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#sorry i'm not very much active on here anymore
chlo-le-mouton · 1 year
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Do you see this shit, Snufkin?
I've missed drawing my round boy so much 😭 Despite being in an animation school, we're not doing a lot of animation in first year. But because I had a bit of time and energy tonight, I thought I'll try animating something. I'm so glad I did! I'm a lot quicker and precise now, and it's so nice to have a reminder of why you're working so hard. I love animating so much, I had almost forgetten how happy it makes me!
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chaoticspacefam · 1 year
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@vihola tagged me to make some OCs in >this< picrew so ofc I jumped on the opportunity!
Tagging (if you want to, up to you & no pressure if not!) @rainofaugustsith @mercurypilgrim @tearlessrain @darth-bagel @outcastcommander @messes-of-men and anyone else who wants to do this one! <3
Have one Saarai because, of course, she is my favourite hahah Also a Maiite!! because this one has vitiligo!! (honestly it has so many options, props to the OP of the picrew! <3) Maite’s a little more red than she should be (she’s more orange-y red really) and ideally her hair would have a more reddish undertone too buuuut everything else was lovely to be able to find options for her in a picrew for once! :D I gave Rai a cocktail and a nice jungle bg because honestly ya girl needs a vacation to a planet that has a nice jungle to remind her of home, she’s EARNED it lmao I had to think a bit for what to put Maite in bc I didn’t really want to cover up all her vitiligo but also I didn’t want them to be dressed exactly the same lmao then I remembered that IRP she likes to steal her husband’s work button-ups and wear them as sleep shirts when he’s done with them so I went for that and some cute shorts & sandals :3
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msgexymunson · 5 months
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Dr E. Munson, D.D.S
Description: praise from your dentist is the last thing you thought would stoke your passions. During another meeting, intoxicated after surgery, you accidently tell him how he makes you feel. 
Warnings: Fluff, angst and smut, my favourite trio. NSFW Minors DNI, reader mid 20s and Eddie mid to late 30s but not explicitly stated, no real time given implied 90s but written as open, reader is AFAB, no use of Y/N, tooth extraction (don’t worry it's not gory), little to no knowledge of the dental industry (please don't come for me I tried my best), fem oral receiving, overstimulation, massive praise kink, p in v protected sex.
A/N: Well, the tale of my praise kink being activated at the dentist appears to have struck a chord with you all, so as unbelievable as this is, just go with it. Eddie's a dentist. Not just a dentist, but a soft pleasure dom dentist ;) I tried to make it believable!! Also, I can't write short fics anymore. I gotta get elaborate before I get into the good ole porn. 
🖤 Comments and reblogs are my lifeblood, please reblog if you want me to keep writing, it really makes my day sweethearts. 🖤
8.8K words
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Fidgeting restlessly with your rings, your leg shakes compulsively as you sit in the sterile waiting room. You really wish you didn't have to go through this alone, but your best friend Alex is working and you are far too old to be going to the dentist with your mom. 
Needs must, though. Yesterday, whilst you were eating one of your nieces candy suckers of all things, you bit down and shattered a wisdom tooth. Just thinking about it you can see Dr Burke's stern face, with his ridiculously bushy eyebrows and wrinkled frown, telling you off for eating too much sugar. 
When the perky receptionist calls your name and instructs you to go to room 2, you're a wobbling bubble of nerves. Walking over the cheap linoleum on click clack heels, you pause for a moment outside the door in confusion. 
The little plaque on the wooden door is different. It used to hold old Dr Burke's name on it, but it's changed. 
Dr E. Munson, D.D.S.
Swinging the door open, you see a much younger man sitting on a swivel stool looking over some notes. His hair is long and wavy, so long he's scraped it into a low ponytail, and there's a sprinkle of stubble over his face. As he looks up, you're met with the deepest, most soulful brown eyes you've ever seen. And is that, an eyebrow piercing? He flashes a grin, one filled with such mischief that for a second you forget why you're here. 
“Well hello! You must be my next patient. Take a seat right here.” 
He pats the treatment chair but you still stand gormlessly by the door. 
“You're not Dr Burke.”
Well done idiot, state the obvious.
“Seems your eyesights OK.” 
He shoots a wink at you which immediately turns your insides to jello. 
“Dr Burke retired actually. I'm Dr Munson, I just moved to the city. You can call me Eddie.” 
He extends a hand out to you. Shuffling forward in your pencil skirt you click your way over to him and take his hand. It's huge, enveloping your own, but he holds your hand with care and shakes it very gently. 
He lets go to wash his hands and put a pair of latex gloves on. 
“You know you don't have to dress up to go to the dentist, but it's appreciated.” 
Is he flirting with me? 
“I-I was at work this morning.” 
You perch on the seat and pull your legs up, sliding your handbag to the floor. 
“So, what seems to be the problem?” 
“I was, well…” 
“It's OK sweetheart, I ain't gonna tell you off.” 
Sweetheart? Oh Holy Shit. 
You found yourself clenching your toes in your heels. This guy is far too hot to be a dentist.
“I was eating a sucker and I, well, I bit down, broke my back right wisdom tooth. It shattered.”
He scoots his stool towards you and instructs you to open your mouth. As he examines you he hums, feeling inside your mouth with a gloved hand. 
“Yup, that's broken up alright. I'm sorry, that must be painful. Don't worry, I'll do my best to help. I'm gonna do an x-ray, that OK?” 
“Yeah.” 
Pulling a little plastic T instrument from his desk, he wheels back over.
“Now, this is going to be uncomfortable, and I'm real sorry. Open your mouth and I'll slide it in gently.” 
Face flickering a violent shade of red, you nod. Surely he's aware of how this sounds?
“OK, open wide, that's it.” 
He puts the little contraption in your mouth.
“OK, now bite down. I know, it's uncomfortable. It'll just take a second. That's it, just breathe for me.” 
It's not intolerable but it's not exactly nice. A moment before it would have been too much he takes it out. 
“That's it, did so good for me. Well done sweetheart.” 
Now, this is not the fucking time to have these sorts of feelings. A heat had started  spreading between your legs that you haven't felt for quite some time. 
“Hmm,” Eddie said as he looked at the x-ray, “I definitely need to remove those pieces. I'm a bit concerned about the tooth above it. That's got a cavity, it'll need to be removed, but it'll need surgery I'm sorry to say.” 
“Surgery? Oh God.” 
“Hey, it'll be alright. I'd do it now but it's too risky. Never had to go into surgery before?” 
Laughing nervously, you fiddle with your fingers. 
“I've never had a tooth removed! I'm a tooth removal virgin.” 
The words just flew out and there was nothing you could do to pull them back. Eddie leaned in a little, a cheeky glint in his eye. 
“Well, then I'll be extra gentle.” 
A stare that's a fraction too long, and he scoots back over to his desk. Not long after he's got a needle in his hand.
“Now, I'm gonna need to numb the area, and this is going to be painful. But once this is done, that's the worst of it. If you need me to stop at any point, you just raise your hand. That OK?” 
“Sure, do what you need to.”
“Atta girl, so brave for me. Open your mouth wide.” 
My good God this man and his words; you can picture yourself on your knees in front of him as he says the same things.
Atta girl, take it a little deeper, that's it, so good for me… 
Squirming hotly in your seat, you do as instructed and his gloved fingers invade your mouth once more. 
“OK, you're gonna feel a sharp scratch, it'll go on for a few seconds, doing it now… good girl.” 
As he says ‘good girl’ two things happen. He injects your gum, and you flood your panties. The pain is inconsequential at this point, you just want him to keep talking to you like that.
“OK, one more sweetheart… that's it, so brave, look at you, taking it so well.” 
He stares at you with those soft brown eyes and once again you forget entirely why you're here. 
“Now, you should start to feel your lips tingle, it'll mean it's working.” 
Your dirty mind can't help but think; which lips? 
As a numbness invades your mouth, you let him know. 
“Yeah, it's definitely working.”
“Good stuff. Now, I'm gonna feel in your mouth again, OK?”
You nod, beyond words, and he puts his fingers in your mouth. 
“Now, if you need me to stop, what do you do?” 
Sheepishly you hold your hand up.
“That's it, atta girl. Such a good listener.” 
Nothing you can do but beam inwardly at the praise.
“Now, you can feel me right here, but there should be no pain, yeah?” 
Resisting the urge to moan around his fingers, you make a sound akin to a muffled ‘uhuh’.
“Awesome, now just hold still, you'll hear some crunching and feel pressure, and then it'll be done.” 
As he pulls a shiny implement from a tray and starts working the tooth shards from your mouth, you focus on his forehead, at the look of total concentration. How the lines on his forehead furrow. How his beautiful eyes harden slightly. How his perfect pink tongue dips out… 
“All done.” 
“Huh?” 
He laughs, a rich, bubbling thing, and nods.
“Yup. You're good. Need to make an appointment at the desk for the other tooth though.”
“Will you be doing that?” 
It rushes out in a blather which you can't control. 
“Sure thing sweetheart. Just ask at the desk for me.” 
“OK. Thanks.” 
“Not a problem. Got to be there for my favourite patient.” 
He flashes another wink at you which seems to rush straight to your knees as you get up and leave on newborn foal legs. Reaching the door, you hear his voice ring out behind you. 
“And what should we do with suckers next time?” 
Turning to face him, he raises an eyebrow, awaiting your response with the most serious expression he's given you so far. 
“I should… suck?” 
“Yeah you should.” 
A mind altering grin later and he's turning back to his desk. 
I should suck? What the hell is wrong with you! You need to get laid like, yesterday.
********************
It's a couple of weeks later and you're laying in the most unflattering hospital gown known to man with your best friend Alex who is trying to distract you. 
“Honey, you'll be fine, they're putting you under! It's like, free drugs!” 
You laugh at his antics, smiling with nerves. 
“It's not the surgery, its-” 
You hear mumbling in the doorway, two nurses gossiping in what they must think is out of earshot. 
“Did you hear? Dr Munsons performing the surgery?” 
“Yeah, he's not even supposed to be here. I hear Dr Stevens is pissed.” 
As they walk away, continuing their whispering, you look over to Alex who is smirking at you. 
“Oh, so he's not even supposed to be here? Ooh he likes you!” 
You blush, thinking about the other day. 
“No! I… I asked for him, that's all. You know I don't like this sort of shit.”
“Ah, so you thought Dr Dreamy would make it bearable huh?” 
“Shut up!” 
Dr Munson walks in then, smiling that smile that held a firm grip on your panties. Alex's eyes widen as he mouths the word ‘hot’ to you. You subtly nod your agreement and then smile at Eddie.
“Well, fancy seeing you here.” 
“Couldn't stay away,” you respond, rolling your eyes. He chuckles back and looks you up and down. 
“I told you sweetheart, no need to get dressed up for me.” 
“What, this old thing?”
You share a laugh whilst Alex's eyebrows raise practically through the roof. This is clearly crossing some line, this banter between you, but he's the doctor and he started it. 
Soon, the procedure has been explained and they're wheeling you out of there and putting you under anaesthesia. 
“OK, good job, such a brave girl. Now, countdown from ten for me.”
“Ten, nine, eight…” 
********************
Blinking bleary-eyed, you look around and catch the eye of your friend. 
“She's awake! You OK?” 
You are OK. In fact, you're fantastic. 
“I'm great! M'I goin’ in surgery now?” 
“You've been, it's done! It's all fine.”
“Huh?” 
A fantastically handsome man walks in, entirely distracting you. Long hair, sparkling eyes, a gorgeous smile, and a slender tall frame. He's so hot. Wait, you can just say he's hot, right? 
“Wow, wh'ryou? You're suuuper hot.” 
He laughs, looking a little embarrassed. 
“I'm Dr Munson, remember? Eddie. The er, drugs will wear off soon.” 
“Eddie!” 
You sit up immediately, despite the hands that shoot out to keep you still. 
“Now, take it easy, the ketamine makes people act a little funny. How are you feeling?”
“M’great! All… floaty like. S’good shit.” 
Eddie laughs as Alex holds his head in his hands. 
“Good to hear. It'll wear off soon, I'm sure your boyfriend will take good care of you.” 
“Nooo he's n’my’boyfrien’. He's suuuper gay. Ya’single? I no’had- not had any for nine months!” 
Alex pipes up. 
“Honey, you know I love you, so much, but you need to shut your mouth.” 
Eddie laughs, flashing his perfect teeth. 
“He's got a point. Glad you're doing good, the surgery went smoothly, so you'll be good to go in a few minutes.”
“Thank's'much Eddie. God, you're s’gorgeous. Did I do good?” 
Eddie looks like he wants to be anywhere but here. 
“Course you did. The best. That's why you're my favourite patient.”
Holding your hand up to your mouth and doing the worst stage whisper known to man, you look at Alex. 
“See? Tol’ ya, his wors’ make me wet.” 
“...aaaand that's the line. Thanks for taking care of her Dr Munson, I'll get her home safe.” 
With protests from you, Eddie shuffles awkwardly out of the room. After a little while you're discharged, with Alex promising to look after you until you're back to normal.
********************
The strong coffee aroma assaults your nostrils; you take a massive inhale of your cup as if the caffeine could be absorbed by smell alone. The coffee shop was busy this Saturday morning but you'd managed to carve out your little comfy seat and tiny table so you can work on your writing. It was a relief after the busy week you've had to actually focus on something you love. 
The noises and chatter of the place wash over you as you zone out, thinking of how to handle the plot twist coming up. It needed to be thoughtful, but unforced, as if the characters… 
“Well, if it isn't my favourite patient.” 
“Huh?” 
You look up and see a very familiar pair of eyes. Eddie. The rest of him however, looks very different. 
Eddie's in an old Iron Maiden t-shirt, worn with age, and tight black jeans. A chain hangs low at his hip, and his large hands are adorned with silver rings. His hair is loose and unkept around his shoulders, but his signature smile still beams at you. His forearms are on display, covered in tattoos. It's certainly not what you were expecting. How did he just get even hotter? 
Remembering what Alex told you about how you made an utter fool of yourself brings you out of your revelry. The stuff you said to him after surgery makes you visibly cringe. You were torn between wanting to ask him out and wanting the ground to swallow you whole. 
Cheeks blazing with heat, you find your voice.
“Eddie! Er, hi.” 
“You mind if I sit here? It's pretty packed.”
Gesturing at him to make himself comfortable, he swings his leg over the stool opposite and sits down, mug of steaming coffee in his hands. 
“What brings you here?” 
“Well, I write. As a hobby, you know? Needed to get out of the house and get some done. And you?” 
He points a thick finger across the street and you gulp in your throat, remembering the feel of those fingers in your mouth. 
“There's a record store across the way, I was scouting for anything I've missed. Unlucky today it seems.” 
It was weird seeing him here. Like when you see a teacher in the wild. Except you're not a kid, and the teacher is fucking fine. 
You nod and share a very uncomfortable silence. 
“Listen, I'm sorry for anything I said-” 
“Hey, don't worry about it sweetheart, it was the drugs. Trust me I've heard some weird shit!”
He seems to shrug it off and you breathe a sigh of relief. The last few weeks all you've managed to think about is how much of a fool you've made of yourself. Hopefully he's chalked it all up to the drugs. No need for him to know you were speaking the truth.
“I gotta say, you don't look like a dentist.” 
Eddie laughs, a perfect deep laugh that has you squirming in your seat. 
“Yeah, I get that alot. I er, used to get beat up when I was a kid. I got punched real hard once, broke my jaw. It was wired shut for like six weeks. After that, well, you find some respect for dentistry. Thought I'd give it a shot, went to school. Seems I have a knack for it. I have an impeccable bedside manner, apparently. Or so I'm told.” 
I'll say. 
“I can- I can see that.” 
He blazes a grin at you that damn near combusts your insides. And that's what you blame for the thing that's about to fall out of your big mouth.
“Listen, I know this is crazy but can I have your number?” 
What the fuck are you doing?? Hitting on your dentist?
It seems your word vomit was indeed something that happened in real life and not just in your head. Eddie looks pained as he warms his hands on his coffee mug. 
“Listen, sweetheart, you're a very pretty girl but… I can't. It'd be wrong of me, you're my patient and-” 
“No, I get it, it was dumb, ignore me.” 
You grab your belongings at the speed of lightning and stuff everything into your bag. 
“Hey, sweetheart, wait, I literally ca-” 
Hell no. 
You've made more of an idiot of yourself than you're prepared to be comfortable with. Now, cheeks burning hotly you shoulder your heavy bag and bustle out of the store, leaving an open mouthed Eddie sitting there with his arm outstretched.
********************
Today was the cherry on top of the icing on top of the cake of embarrassment. You've never asked a guy for his number before and the first time you do you're shot down? Confidence well and truly knocked, you called around and found a new dentist, and then called your old dentist's office to let them know. There was no way you could face Eddie again after you'd made a fool of yourself three times. 
In an effort to cheer yourself up after that disastrous rendezvous, you'd dressed up, put on your highest heels paired with your shortest skirt and a red silk blouse, and went out for a night on the town. 
Now, you don't make a habit of sitting at the bar on your own. You've dealt with enough creeps in your time to know that it was a bad idea. However, when it comes to your friends, you can give a little leeway. 
Hence why you sat in your very short black skirt, heels tapping on the little rail on the bottom of the bar as you sip your Manhattan, watching your friend Alex out the corner of your eye have a make-out session with his new boyfriend. They were sitting at a table just to the right; you were on a barstool giving them a couple feet of privacy. 
It was getting a little old though. In the past half an hour three men had approached you. You can't lie to yourself, it was the reason you'd agreed to be a third wheel in the first place. Trying to manifest the right kind of man clearly wasn't working however. 
The first guy looked around twelve, with the wispiest facial hair you've ever seen. As he'd nervously bumbled a line at you, you told him you've never seen a theoretical moustache before. That saw the back of him. Contestant number two was the sleaziest douchebag in the whole bar, perhaps the entire city. He was the hardest to deal with; you'd ended up just turning away and ignoring him until he'd left. Number three was some balding, middle aged man with a pot belly and a stained tie. Exhausted by the previous two, you interrupted his practised line with one clear and concise ‘No’.
Almost certain that your date tonight would involve you with your vibrator, you order another cocktail. On your left directly next to you a guy starts leaning on the bar and calls to the bartender. 
“Hey Jack, can I get a beer please, and whatever this lovely girl is drinking.” 
Rolling your eyes and turning to look at contestant number four, ready to tell them to fuck right off, you realise its Eddie. Of course it fucking is. The universe seems to have a horrible sense of humour today. He's still in his jeans and boots, but now sporting a burgundy shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Stupid dentist and his stupid hot tattooed forearms. 
“Are you following me? I don't need a pity drink thanks, I'm good.” 
You reach into your purse to pay for the drink you ordered but Eddie already has cash in his hand. He pays for it anyway and leans on the bar facing you. 
“It's not pity, it's an apology for earlier. And I think you're the one following me, I live two floors up.” 
Lips pressed into a firm line, you stir your drink with its cocktail stick and pretend that dentists don't exist.
“You can't just ignore me, you know.” 
Taking a sip of your drink you continue to stare resolutely forward. 
“OK, you can just ignore me, but I'd like it if you didn't.” 
Another sip, and you pull the little cherry off its stick and chew it. 
“So, you got a thing for dentists or is it just me, sweetheart?” 
That's it, you turn angrily to face him and scowl. 
“That's totally unfair you can't just-”
“Ha, got ya talking.” 
He's grinning at his little victory, laughter lines creasing near his eyes. If your eyes could shoot daggers you're sure he would have died from blood loss at this point. 
“Listen, I'm sorry, OK? I would have said yes in a fucking heartbeat, but I could lose my license.” 
Your eyes soften; he's clearly telling the truth and it does make sense. His licence hadn't even entered your mind. 
“I understand. Sorry for being rough on you.” 
“Don't worry about it. I just thought I better clear the air if I'm gonna be your dentist.” 
“Oh, don't worry about it. You're not.” 
“Huh?”
Looking down at the bar and drawing circles in the condensation from your drink with a finger, you explain. 
“I couldn't face seeing you again, so I, ha, ran off to a different dentist. It's a half hour out of my way, but never mind.” 
Eddie's posture changes immediately, standing fully to attention. 
“You're not my patient anymore?” 
“Nope,” you reply, and knock back the last of your drink, “I'm not.” 
“You're not my patient anymore.” 
You risk looking back at him; he's wide eyed, nodding in your direction, as if he's just told a joke that you didn't get. Face scrunched with confusion, you blink it away as a light bulb pings on inside your head. 
“Oh. I'm not your patient anymore.” 
The grin that slowly unfolds across Eddie's face is damn right sinful. 
“You wanna come upstairs?” 
“Hell yes.” 
Leaping lightly off of the bar stool, you turn to dislodge your coat from the back of Alex's chair and wave at him frantically to tell him you're leaving. He turns to you, then Eddie, then back to you with what can only be described as A Look. If you weren't so excited you would have admonished him, but who the fuck cares. 
Eddie grabs your hand firmly and pushes through the thronging crowd with you in tow. The cold night air hits you like a blow to the chest when you escape, as does your rash decision. 
Eddie seems to sense your hesitation. Pulling you into a doorway he grabs your other hand and looks at you. 
“Sweetheart, you know you don't have to do anything you don't want to. We can just go upstairs, have a drink, or not, and chat. Really.” 
“Really?” You cock your head with the question as he licks his bottom lip with a pink tongue, dragging it to his perfect teeth to bite. He looks nervous, and for some reason, that is doing it for you right now. 
“Really. I'm just saying we don't have to rush-” 
The rest of his sentence is swallowed whole by your kiss as you tip your head up and push your lips against his firmly. Eddie grabs your waist with one hand, the other snaking into your hair to cradle your head. 
For a moment you forget about the cold, about the fact that anyone can see you like this right now. All that matters is the pounding heat of his body smashing against yours and the passion pouring from his tongue as it swipes and rolls and fills your mouth with unexpected moans.
Nails digging into his back, as if attempting to claw under his clothes, you force his body against the wall in the wanton desire to be closer. His hand massages the silk of your blouse at your waist, warmth spreading from his palm into your very flesh and seeping down between your legs. 
You'd have him, right here, against this wall, right now, if he hadn't pulled your head back softly to break the kiss. The tips of your noses rub together as you both gasp for the same air. He's smiling and biting his lip again, but this time it looks like a distraction to stop himself from devouring you. Eddie breaks the feral spell first.
“So, just a chat, yeah?” 
You both laugh, a giddy silly thing reserved for the two of you. 
“Yeah, you're probably right. Don't want to rush these things.” 
Nodding sagely, you take his proffered hand and let him lead you inside and up the stairs. 
You're not sure what you expect his place to look like, but you're pleasantly surprised at how open and spacious it is. Hardwood floors, big windows, a big black sofa, and an open kitchen area with a little breakfast bar. There's a wall of shelves with what must be hundreds of records, CDs and tapes on it, all neatly organised and displayed, and an expensive looking sound system. Two guitars sit by the couch as if they'd been played recently, along with an amp that seems to be doubling as a side table. There's a small pile of boxes over by one wall that have yet to be unpacked. And that's it.
No wonder it looks so spacious, there's nothing in it. 
“Eddie, it's a great place, but er, where's all your stuff?” 
He looks a little sheepish as he flicks a standing lamp on and shuts the curtains. 
“Yeah. Got the basics sorted; kitchen, bedroom, music. Honestly, never lived anywhere this big before, and my last place came furnished.” 
He gestures widely at the sofa with a swing of his arm and you perch on it, ankles crossed, fully aware of how short your skirt is. 
“So, you wanna drink? Unfortunately I can't make a Manhattan but I’ve got rum, some vodka, sodas, maybe a beer?” 
“What do you mean you can't make a Manhattan? What sort of establishment is this?” 
You huff dramatically, folding your arms. 
“I'm terribly sorry Ma’am, I shall have a word with the management.” 
Eddie falls to one knee in a low bow, a mock plea for your forgiveness and the sheer goofiness makes your heart do a little hop inside your chest. 
“What can I possibly do to make it up to you?” 
His eyes are open, honest and sincere. But the grin fighting to crawl over his face is naughtiness personified.
“Well I shall have a beer now, and maybe you can make it up to me later?” 
Smirking, he presses a soft kiss to your knee, then another, to the side of it. Letting his teeth drag further he playfully nips at the outside of your thigh and smooths the area with a lick. 
Breathe. Remember, you need oxygen to live. 
You take a harsh, ragged breath in as if inhaling for the first time and try to concentrate on slowing your heart rate. This is madness, you feel wrecked from a sprinkling of kisses. 
Feeling Eddie's soft chuckle as the air from it dances on your thigh, he gets back up looking far too pleased with himself. 
“You know, you shouldn't be that forward with a lady.” 
Throwing his head back and laughing loudly he walks around the back of the couch. Directly behind you, he begins talking again. 
“I don't see a lady here.” 
Whipping your head around to reprimand him, he bends to your level and whispers in your exposed ear. 
“I see a very good girl.” 
Words die in your throat having never reached your tongue. There's no witty repartee, just an odd noise that blurts out of you, halfway between a whimper and a squeak. 
Eddie walks away towards the fridge to grab your drink, no doubt with a very smug look on his face. In his absence you fan yourself to try to quench some of the raging heat within, but at this point it's like throwing a water bomb at a house fire. Undoing one button on your blouse, you let the girls have a little air at least. 
He returns, drinks in hand, and offers one to you with a bow of his head. 
“Milady.” 
You take it and sip as Eddie sits next to you. 
“I thought I wasn't a lady?”
“You are right, absolutely right,” he responds, shuffling closer to put an arm around you, and nuzzles your neck teasingly, “and I am not a gentleman.” 
You reach out to the side, and realise there's nowhere to put your beer. 
“Eddie, you need a coffee table or something.” 
“Just, put it on the floor.” 
Placing it gently on the floor, wincing as you do so, you mumble half to yourself, “if my mother could see me now…” 
“I'm sure she'd have more important things to say than about the lack of coasters, sweetheart.” 
“You have a very good point.” 
Eddie holds your jaw, softly turning your face to his own, and presses a kiss to your cheek, then your jaw, and finally to your lips. It's more gentle than the searing heat of the last one; a languid spell of tongues finding their way against each other. 
As you both break away, Eddie strokes your bare thigh, whispering in your ear as he does so. 
“God, when you walked in my office, I thought I might have to switch professions. I just wanted to hike that tight skirt up and bury my face right here.” 
His hand moves up your leg, a finger ghosting over the top of your panties that makes a shiver work all its way to the tips of your toes. It's a bold move, and one you wouldn't stand for usually, but this is Eddie. You've been fantasising about this for the last two months. Hell, this scene has played in your brain so long it was almost like it didn't feel like the first time.
So, if he's going to be that bold, then bold it is.
“Well, I gotta confess, it took a lot for me to not moan around your fingers in my mouth.” 
Eddie groans loud, throwing his head against the back of the couch. 
“Fuck that's so hot. C'mere.” 
He's coaxing you into his lap and you follow his lead, swinging your leg across him and most likely giving him a choice view of your lacy underwear. His large hands wander over your frame, mapping out your curves with his eyes as well as his fingers. 
“Eddie.” 
You breathe it out, your hands resting on his shoulders. He's getting hard beneath you, you can feel it as your hips start to move back and forth of their own accord. 
“Hmm?” 
He doesn't look up, busy stroking your sides, thumb brushing your breasts with each pass. Every nerve feels like a live wire, feeling more needy than you think you've ever been. 
“Eddie, please, just kiss me.” 
“No.” 
“No?”
He does look at you then, giving you a cheeky smile.
“I think I've got the hottest girl in the city on my lap right now, let me savour it a little.” 
Rolling your eyes, you reach to the front of your blouse and start unbuttoning it slowly, letting the silky fabric fall off your shoulders and away. The fates seem to be in your favour for once; this is your best bra, adorned in satin and black lace.
“Well, someone's eager. Were you looking to get lucky tonight?” 
Eddie says as he smirks at you, a hand stroking up, over your laced covered chest, coming to rest on the side of your throat. 
“It's been a while Eddie, forgive me for being keen.” 
“Oh yeah, what was it? Nine months, right?” 
Cringing at his words whilst he chuckles, you rest your forehead on his shoulder to hide your face. 
“Technically no.” It's muffled into the fabric of his shirt.
“No?”
Still unwilling to look at him, you reply, “that was a few weeks ago. It's ten now.” 
Pulling you upright again, he playfully pouts, a little mocking face that's making your insides pulse. 
“Aw, poor, poor baby. Guess I shouldn't tease so much. Why don't you take this ridiculous skirt off and sit for me sweetheart.” 
It's comical how quickly you follow his directions, shuffling your skirt off and laying back on the sofa, ass near the edge, as he drops to his knees on the floor in front of you. 
“That's it, right there. Such a good listener.”
As he runs his hands up the inside of your thighs, you spread your legs to make room for him, breath quickening in anticipation. 
“I suppose I better check,” he says as he looks up at you with a serious expression, pierced eyebrow arching. 
“Check what?” 
“How wet my words made you.” 
‘Oh God!” you squeak, hiding in your hands, “I can't believe you remembered that!” 
“Remembered it? I can't think of anything else.” 
His thick rough fingertips reach higher and higher; he slips two under your panties, hooking them to one side as his digits glide through your wetness. 
“Oh sweetheart, you're soaked. That must be uncomfortable. Don't worry I'm gonna do something about that.” 
You're thinking of something clever to say back but your mind empties entirely as his touch moves to your clit and rubs slow, deliberate circles. 
The relief of him finally stroking just where you need it has you near tears, breathy gasps pulling from your chest and rushing out your mouth. 
His fingers leave you suddenly and you resist the urge to stamp your foot like an impatient toddler, fists tight at your sides. Eddie raises up on his knees, leaning toward your chest. 
“I'm gonna take this off first, that OK sweetheart?” 
He runs a finger between the valley of your breasts as he speaks, making your back arch into the hint of a touch. 
“Y-yes.” 
“Atta girl.” 
He reaches behind you and flicks your bra clasp, opening it with such ease that it makes you question internally how many times he's done that before. Then, he pulls the straps down slowly and with such reverence that you forget your thoughts. 
“Jesus Christ, you are just perfect aren't you.” 
Solid knuckles rub gently over a pebbled nipple making you whimper and bite your lip. Leaning in, his mouth is wet and warm, almost leisurely massaging your nipple, then giving the same amount of care and attention to the other. 
When his teeth graze you an unfiltered moan shoots out from you, entirely unbidden. 
“Wow, you're really sensitive,” he says when he unlatches his mouth. He pinches one abruptly and you cry out, hand grasping at his bicep in pleasurable shock. Licking his lips, he grins at you. 
“Oh we are gonna have a lot of fun sweetheart.” 
Running a finger just under the hem of your panties, he pulls them down as you assist him, lifting your ass to give him room. He shakes his head, biting his lip as he takes all of you in with his eyes now that you're entirely exposed, as if he can’t believe his luck. 
Kissing down your quivering form, he finally slips that overbold tongue of his between your folds, running it back and forth over your sensitive nub. His tongue searches you, taking care to leave no spot untouched. It's deliberate; a slow and intense exploration of your sex, as if mapping out every sweet spot, spurred on by the moans spilling from your lips with ever increasing frequency. 
Each sound you make is echoed, mirrored by Eddie, as if he was taking as much enjoyment in eating you out as you were in receiving it. The build up is as slow as his movements, but that certainly isn't a bad thing. Far from it. The feeling fizzing in your very blood is deep and profound, and it keeps building. 
Until Eddie does this twirling thing with his tongue that makes your eyes cross, that sets each one of your nerves on fire, fingers desperately grasping at his soft waves as you moan even louder. 
“Fuck, Eddie! Right there!” 
His words are muffled, a hint of amusement in them, but you're sure he says “yes ma'am.”
Then he does it again, and again, tongue twisting like it's independent from his body, swirling you into a deep pool of overwashing ecstasy. Back leaving the soft confines of the couch you clutch at his hair as your hoarse moans pound out of you, until you flop back down, a glistening panting mess. 
Eddie's still kissing your delicate parts, leaving soft, almost innocent kisses. He presses his lips to your clit again and you squirm, trying to get out of his gentle, grasping hands. It's a soft touch, but his hands are immovable, like velvet wrapped around a steel bar. 
“Eddie, fuck, I-I'm really sensitive-” 
“Oh I know sweetheart,” he says, pressing his mouth against you over and over, “but we're not done.” 
Staring at him wide eyed, he lifts one hand, ring and middle finger outstretched, and brushes the tips of them to your kiss bitten bottom lip. 
“Can you get these nice and wet for me sweetheart?”
Parting your lips slightly, he slips the fingers inside and you do as instructed, licking and suckling on them, surprised by how fiercely you wanted to. They felt rough and heavy on your tongue. Eddie's staring at you with a burning admiration in his eyes, still pushing his lips to you. He suckles softly at your clit making you writhe and moan around him. As he pulls his fingers out you call to him. 
“Eddie, I can't it's too much-” 
“Shhh, princess, do you really want me to stop?” 
A little drop of shame trickles down your throat at the thought. 
“No,” you whisper. 
“That's what I thought,” he says as his fingers circle your silken entrance, “be good for me sweetheart, good girls come twice.” 
You're not sure if the heady moan that you release is due to his fingers slipping inside you, or his words. It could be a combination of both. Stroking at you incessantly, his fingers drive into you, perpetually caressing that soft spot inside that makes your toes curl. 
Your release creeps up unsurprisingly fast. It's all force and pressure, a tightening, full feeling that's gripping your insides in its strong claws. One minute you're holding on to reality and the next, you're gone, floating away as the pressure melts and cascades from you like stardust. 
Your vision unblurring, you realise what's happened when the sound of it reaches your ears. That squelching, soaking noise of Eddie's fingers working you through the last throes of your pleasure. 
As you look down Eddie's staring at your dripping pussy with awe, having to pull his fingers out of you with a bit of force since you don't seem to want to let go. He sits back on his heels with a smile that could rival the Cheshire cats, absolutely coated in your juices. It's covering his face, his hand, and it's even darkened the front and sleeve of his shirt. 
An apology nestles on the tip of your tongue, but it stays there when Eddie speaks. 
“Atta girl, did so good for me. Fuck, I kinda want to see if you can do that again.” 
Opening your mouth for a witty remark, it escapes you. Your usually sharp mind is now the consistency of spray cheese. All that comes out is a soft little noise, a cross between a hum and a thank you. 
“Stay right there, I'll be back.” 
You giggle a little as he runs off. Where on earth does he think you'll go? And more importantly, how? 
When he returns his face and hands are clean, and crucially, he's shirtless. Lean muscle gleams in the low light, decorated with a dozen or so tattoos. He's got a cloth in one hand, and a glass of water in the other. 
“Here, drink up sweetheart, you need it.” 
You search for a hint of playfulness or smugness in his face and come up empty. In fact, he's staring, waiting for you to take a sip. When you do, he smiles, and goes about wiping the tops of your thighs. The cloth is even warm. You've never been given a warm cloth before, the closest being a handful of scrunched up tissues. 
“Eddie, where have you been all my life?” 
Laughing loudly, he sits next to you, stealing a sip of your water. 
“I came as quickly as I could.” 
It was a cheesy line, but you're beyond caring, a goofy grin smeared all over your face. 
“Can I take you to the bedroom?” 
You nod and before you can get up he's scooping you into his arms. 
“Eddie, I can walk you know,” you say as you drape your arms around his neck. 
“Oh I know, I just want to take care of you.” 
Fuck. You could move in tomorrow. 
The only things you notice about the bedroom are the soft blue of the duvet as he places you gently on top of it and the bedside lamps he flicks on that bathe the room in a warm glow. The rest doesn't matter, not right now. Your eyes are on him as he stands at the edge of the bed, looking at you as if you were a beautiful sculpture carved from the finest marble. 
Getting up on your knees, you smile cheekily up at him as you hook your fingers into the worn denim and pop the top button. 
“And what do you think you're doing?” He asks, hand moving up to cradle your face. 
“I was going to return the favour.” 
You unzip the fly and pull them down, eyes widening at the swollen bulge in his trunks. They're tight, leaving little room for the imagination, but anything you may have imagined couldn't possibly compare to the real thing. 
“Not tonight sweetheart. Like I said, I want to take care of you.” 
He turns to the nightstand and rummages around, pulling out a packet of condoms. It's new, you notice, as he unwraps the film and takes one out, placing it on the side whilst he rolls his underwear off.
As he's putting it on you gawp shamelessly, truly wondering if it's actually going to fit. No wonder he's so confident. 
“Did you actually just turn down a blow job?” 
He smiles, crawling between your legs and caging your head between his arms. 
“What can I say, I'm a giver.” 
He stops for a moment, knuckles stroking your cheek. 
“You sure you wanna do this?” 
Smiling gently, you reach down and grasp his solid member making him jolt, and rub the tip through your slick. 
“Yes.” 
You line him up and his smile turns into an open mouthed groan, eyebrows knitting together as he starts slipping inside of you. 
“Eddie, holy- fuck.” 
“You're OK sweetheart, doing such a good job for me.” 
He pushes in further and you realise why all the foreplay was necessary. Clearly, he enjoyed it too, but you're not sure you could have taken him without it. When he's finally sitting flush inside you wince a little, hands tight on his shoulders. 
“You feel incredible, so tight for me.” 
Whimpering, you can feel your cheeks heat with the praise. 
“God you really do like my words don't you?” 
Grinning mischievously, he plants a soft kiss to your lips. It weirdly feels more intimate than him being inside you. 
“Y-yeah, it's really sexy Eddie.” 
His cock kicks up inside you, making you gasp a little. 
“You're really sexy. The little sounds you make, your moans.”
As if demonstrating that, he pulls out a little and thrusts in gently, forcing a quivering sigh from you. 
“See? Fucking perfect sweetheart.” 
He begins rolling his hips into you, never pulling out too much, as if he couldn't stand to be any further apart. 
One of his sinewy arms snakes its way underneath you, holding you close as he playfully nips your earlobe and breathing whispers into your ear. 
“How many times?” 
“Huh?” You respond, utterly lost in the feel of him dragging against your gripping walls. 
“How many times do you want to come?” 
You giggle, despite the situation, or maybe because of it.
“I don't usually, oh, get t-to choose, is there a- oh fuck- there a menu or something?” 
He chuckles and slows down just slightly, pushing into you devastatingly deep. 
“What's the most you've managed?” 
He's so thick, and the feel of him is otherworldly; it had you wondering how it'd feel without the layer of latex between you. 
“I can't- fuck- I can't think- like two?”
He stops, looking at you incredulously  with a furrowed brow.
“Two? We can do better than that.” 
He speeds up, leaning on one arm as his other hand finds its way down your torso and begins to rub your clit. That pulse inside you is sent into overdrive, mouth open and panting as you cling to his back, nails digging into his skin. 
Your release swells inside, growing, and intensifying, until it suddenly pops, showering you in pleasure. Tears spring in the corners of your eyes as you moan out your release an inch from his face.
“Atta girl,” Eddie says as he nudges you with his nose, “do that again.” 
Your clit feels a little sore, swollen and sensitive after so much pleasure. His touch is gentle, but it's still overwhelming. 
“Eddie, I-I can't, please-” 
“You want me to stop? I'll stop if you want that sweetheart.” 
The sharp feeling begins to dull, making way for another wave of euphoria that washes over your whole body. Legs twitching uncontrollably, you whine long and low, a flood of noises bursting from you that no damn could ever stop. 
“That a no, sweetheart?” 
“Don't stop don't stop don’t stop - oh!” 
You'd be embarrassed by the crazy noise you made as you come again, if you were even aware of it. A screeching loud moan, eyes scrunched as your body leaves the bed and your nails drag across his bare back. 
“That's it, knew you could, so good for me. Fuck, nearly lost it.” 
He does stop then, biting his lip to stop himself from unleashing his own orgasm as his breath comes in short huffs. 
“Eddie, you don't have to- ohmygod!”
The last of your sentence evaporates on your tongue as he hooks his arms under your legs and pushes your thighs flush to your chest. It seems even Eddie has lost the power of speech, dirty moans pouring from his mouth that rival your own. 
He's so deep, impossibly deep; as if he were in your guts at this point. You've never felt so full in all your life. Your third release is almost there, a tightening string wound around you, pulling and twisting and contorting your body into a writhing sweaty shambles. 
You're clenching and convulsing around his pumping length as he twitches inside you, his groans and grunts spurring you on. It's faster now, his thrusts becoming more erratic. Sweat clings to the very air, the heat in the room creating this cloying humidity that dampens each breath out, making hair stick to skin and creating loud slapping sounds of your conjunction. 
Eddie's face is red with effort, teeth gritted and lips tight. 
“Are you gonna come again? I can feel you. Please, sweetheart, please- fuck- I need it, I need it, come with me!” 
You let go. The tight string breaks and your orgasm spreads through your very soul; it's so profound and savage that tears spill out and down your cheeks with its intensity. Eddie joins you, coming as one with a drawn out groan that borders on feral. 
For a moment, you both revel in it, just panting, feeling sticky skin against skin, heartbeats slowing, muscles unwinding and relaxing. 
He finally unhooks his arms from your legs and you lay them shakily on the down as he clambers off, collapsing next to you on the bed. 
“You OK sweetheart?” 
“Hmm.”
It's all you can reply with, a little satisfied noise. Scooting closer to him, you place your hand hesitantly on his chest. 
“Hang on a sec.” 
He gets up and disposes of the condom, slowly padding out the room. Returning again with another glass of water for you, he hands it over with a raise of an eyebrow. This time you take it gratefully, chugging half of it before passing it back. 
A moment of panic grips your chest, followed by shame. You barely know him, yet you'd gone to his place with hardly any hesitation. 
As he lays back down next to you, scooping his arm around your back, you clear your throat. 
“I just, er, wanted you to know I don't usually do this.” 
“Hey, it's alright. Neither do I.”
Feeling slightly less trampy, you stroke his chest with delicate fingers, wishing for the moment to last but knowing it can't. 
“I don't think my legs work anymore, I think you'll have to call me a taxi.”
Eddie sits up suddenly, looking at you with anguish written all over his face. 
“You're not leaving, are you?” 
“Well, I don't fancy doing the walk of shame tomorrow in that outfit.” 
He pouts, looking much younger than he is. 
“Oh. Well, you can always borrow something to wear?” 
“That's even worse!” You laugh, hitting his chest softly. 
“Fine, then I'll go out in the morning and buy you something to wear.” 
Staring at him wide eyed, you realise he's not joking. 
“Really?” 
“Sweetheart, I'd buy you a whole new wardrobe if it meant you’d stay.” 
Heart beating just that little bit faster in your chest, you fight the tears that want to build up. 
“I just thought, you know, well, we don't know each other that well and that you might think this was just, a thing.” 
“You mean a one night thing?”
You nod, not trusting your voice. 
“C'mere.” 
Melting into his open arms, he kisses the top of your head.
“I want you to stay. I'll take you home Monday and-” 
“Eddie, tomorrow's Sunday.” 
“I know.” 
“Eddie, I have to work Monday. So do you!” 
You laugh, trying to break free of his arms but he doesn't let up. 
“Fine, I'll take you home tomorrow. Late. Then see you Monday night.” 
Face hurting from smiling, you settle into the cuddle, the swell of feeling in your chest almost too much for you right now. 
“Eddie I can't stay. I don't have a toothbrush.” 
You say it jokingly, and he squeezes you. 
“It's fine, I've got like 20 of them from work.” 
“Thief.” 
“I prefer to think of it as resourceful.” 
Suddenly he pulls you on top of him making you squeal. 
“So you gonna stay?” 
“Yeah, fine I'll stay.” You try to say it in a mocking manner but your silly grin belies your rolling eyes. 
“Good.” 
Holding you close, Eddie breathes such a sigh of relief; a deep one, one that sounds like he's been holding in for some time. A sigh that makes you feel special. 
Permanent Taglist (couple of these are assumed, if you want off let me know! Same if you want to be added sweethearts)
@liminalpebble @eddies-puppet @rip-quizilla @micheledawn1975 @vanilla-demon @millercontracting @roanniom @josephquinnsfreckles @leelei1980 @mrsjellymunson @usedtobecooler @eddiesprincess86 @ali-r3n
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fauustic · 11 months
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hi hi! i'm not very active on tumblr anymore but i came back for miguel o'hara and your snippets are what are keeping me alive at the very moment, is it alright if i request for some miguel fluff?
the prompt is that he tries really hard to keep his "touch-starvedness" unnoticeable but reader makes that very hard for him because even brushing shoulders and hands is enough to send him into cardiac arrest. it all goes to hell when reader gets genuinely concerned for him and twists into reader giving miguel the gentle touch he deserves :3
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(( I loved this ask so much... I will definitely do a different concept with this idea to bring it more justice! thank you for your request, so wonderful nonetheless! ))
my requests are still open!! i didn't proofread this one so if there are any mistakes sorry!!
gender-nonconforming reader x miguel “spider-man 2099″ o’hara
fluff. miguel, so desperately touch-starved, yearns for any touch he can’t get. you unknowingly give it to him.
warnings: jealous and slightly violent miguel, perhaps slightly suggestive? MAINLY FLUFF THOUGH!! HE LOVES YOU SM!! anyhow he’s just a little silly and painfully in love with his co-worker ..
word count: 2852
A soft bump met your shoulders, tilting the vial you held ever so delicately with much more force than anticipated from the unexpected collision. The goggles resting upon your nose slanted from the impact as the burst of color within the flask splashed onto your lab coat. A frustrated groan erupted from your lips as a light chuckle sounded from right beside you. 
“Jeez– this isn’t funny Miguel!” You couldn’t help but whine while hurriedly cleaning up your lab station before anyone from a different department of Alchemax could see your slip-up. The vial that held a mysterious substance wasn’t anything to worry about, it was a prototype for a more ecologically efficient paint alternative to further the health of citizens amongst Nueva York– but the progress being wiped away over something as small as a little bump on the shoulder almost made you fall to your knees. 
Being hired as a rookie chemist to the most successful chemical corporation in existence had you sweating bullets over your every move– not even allowing yourself to step foot in the break room in fear that you’d have to reiterate what you have done during your time here. Which was much less accomplished than your assigned veteran lab partner, who always offered to help bring your concepts to fruition– but you declined with ease because you wanted to feel worthy to the department you were assigned.
This didn’t stop Miguel from coincidentally being a step behind your movements always, despite your insistence that you had everything under control.
It was nerve-wracking, feeling his gaze study you a bit too hard as you measured how clean a sample of underground Nueva York was in the dim light of a late night shift. He’d make quips, soft against your exhausted temple while Miguel would finish the rest of your unfinished goals. Drifting off into the embrace of sleep, your eyes would crack open ever so slightly as he examined your work with a level of admiration in his gaze you've never noticed fully awake– tinkering and fiddling with whatever environmentally-productive project you had going on that shift. The last recollection of the night would be the touch of Miguel’s knuckles grazing your shoulders, a jacket wrapping around your back like a blanket. The smell of praline alongside bergamot orange stuck to your body like a shadow as you slumped awake the following morning, rushing home to shower and get ready for the shift you had the upcoming afternoon.
Following the next day, Miguel had a subtle smile upon his features as you returned his jacket with a flustered expression he’s never seen from you. Excitement bubbled against his chest like a shaken-up soda as he observed the slight bow of your head in appreciation, hands atop his scarred grasp that held onto the jacket you returned. You never caught the deep breaths flooding his lungs as the two of you separated, his jacket held tightly against his hammering heart. “I, I need to go grab a coffee–” Miguel muttered underneath his breath, leaving before you could even acknowledge his dismissal. Confusion dazed your focus, remembering the last time you asked if he had wanted any coffee he mentioned he didn’t even like the caffeinated drink in the first place. Told you it made his insomnia worse.
The both of you had grown closer ever since that experience as surprising as it was, due to his cocky yet cold attitude usually clashing against your focus. If it wasn’t for his seriousness, the two of you would be bickering like partners forced to work on a group project in grade school. Which brought you back to the present, cleaning up the mess he had technically created due to bumping into you. A frown etched upon his face, stress lines from his hundreds of late shifts growing prominent at the tip of his lips. “I was doing something important– and you waltz in and just knock it all over?”
“‘Didn’t mean to, conejito.” Miguel replied in his usual matter-of-fact tone, waving off his actions like every other time he's accidentally skewed your focus. "But I'm more than willing to fix what I did if you just stop acting like a spooked animal." It rolled off his tongue like an insult, but you knew that's just how he spoke. Short and blunt, with little quips towards anyone who annoys him just briefly. Just like every other co-worker, despite the amount of time the two of you have spent together, you always would get a taste of his attitude before you snapped right back at him.
But today, you were tired and running off of pure coffee as the sun began to set. Bickering with Miguel was something you wanted to stray away from at the time being. So you caved, giving him a gesture to come closer to you. "You can't help if you are standing seven feet away from me, O'Hara." You told him the obvious, readjusting the goggles that sat atop your nose while you went over the variables involved with your test. 
For the first time in response to your sarcasm, Miguel was silent. Seconds ticked by as you grew more invested in resuming from where you left off, the little quarrel leaving your mind as soon as it came. You thought he'd ignore you and end up doing his own thing in your shared lab, but the distinct footfalls from his leather shoes moving closer after the rare quietness proved you wrong.
Miguel slid up right beside your hunched stance, close enough that the warmth from his arms met your wrists but not close enough where his rolled-up sleeves would collide against the fabric fitted against your arms.
You stood there, measuring the exact precise measurements from before with the several natural ingredients surrounding the both of you. And Miguel just watched, at least that's what you assumed, because that burning gaze of his seeped into the back of your head and sizzled against your fingertips working painstakingly slow mixing and working against the organic compounds. Nervousness prickled your skin, goosebumps following in its wake.
Due to your posture, when you snapped your attention to him you couldn't help but look up. Miguel's features were soft, an expression that you've never seen on him meeting your eyes. He was looking down at you, breathing in sleepily while subsciously leaning his body into your space. The unusual mannerism caught your attention with haste, and you were about to question if he was feeling okay before he perked up like he got shocked.
His gaze was distant until he realized you were looking straight at him– immediately looking off towards the vials you had splayed in front of you like he was caught doing something wrong. You couldn't help but frown while you watched Miguel exhale deeply, his index and thumb meeting the bridge of his nose in a habit you've noticed throughout your time here. Miguel was stressed. 
"Hey, it's okay that you messed up." The forgiveness falling from your lips only made him curl into himself more. Worry clouded your mind at seeing him so worked up, something you were so unfamiliar with. Usually, Miguel expressed himself in abrupt irritation that you always tried to help him through– the silent loathing almost made you ask him to go home out of concern. "Mistakes happen in the lab, Miguel. Please don't beat yourself up.
Soft graze meeting his shoulder, his body tensed up at the unexpected attempt of your's that was made to comfort him. The both of you danced around each other at best, the most contact from one another would be leading his movements with your own hold onto his hands while instructing assistance. Miguel's mouth fell agape, his unusually sharp canines he kept away was brought to your attention from the dim light highlighting his features. A gasp followed as your hand met his cheek while aiming for his forehead, which he tried to cover up with a cough. 
"What are you doing–" He hissed out in a mess as the heat blooming from his cheeks set your own touch aflame. You hushed him, which he obliged without a word. Strange, you thought to yourself again. He never acts like this towards anyone, let alone get this close to another chemist within the building of Alchemax.
Palm brushing against the strands of hair blessing his forehead, you checked his temperature while his eyes fluttered close. "I'm checking your temperature, Miguel." You murmured against his jaw, boosting your height on your tiptoes in order to reach his forehead. "You've been off today, it's concerning." 
"I'm fine," He muttered into the space between you, beginning to distance himself from your touch until your free hand met his other shoulder. It was as if a weight held him into place, grounding him within your touch as he shakily dug his fingers into his black dress-pants. You hadn't noticed the subtle slices into his thighs from his claws. Miguel's resolve was failing terribly.
His breath, quick and shallow, met the skin of your ear. It tickled. Hot air crashed into your contrasting cold flesh, digging into your nerves like boiling water.
Once your skin met his temple, he pushed against your touch like you were the only thing keeping himself afloat. His grasp met your elbow while the other relied on the counter for support. "Just feeling a bit under the weather." Miguel managed to mumble, brow furrowing as if he was in pain– never once did you catch the reddened hue painting his face and flustered glint in his eye.
"I've been telling you to stop overworking yourself," you scold him softly, shaking his grasp on your elbow just to take his hands into yours. "How much sleep have you gotten recently?" The question makes him cringe, the dark circles around his eyes as prominent as ever.
"Not enough." He admitted.
"You know that's not good for you." You reminded him with a frown. Warmth blossomed in your chest as his skin, warm and marred from his work with all sorts of scientific junk, caressed your knuckles with his thumb. He had calmed down as time ticked by, a sleepiness that clung onto him as darkness painted the canvas beyond the window of your floor. A huff of air escaped his lips as he rested his cheek against the cool of the lab table, safely distanced from what you were working on. Miguel’s hand didn’t dare move from your grasp, and you didn’t think about moving either. Miguel was slowly becoming a good friend of your’s, if something so small as a little comfort was needed you were more than willing to help.
“Yeah, yeah.” Was all he said. Silence dawned over the both of you as you resumed back to fixing up his mistakes. The dim light filled words left unsaid with a soft ambience, vials clinging against each other gently while liquids poured into one another. The night ended with you successfully conjuring up an ecological alternative to whatever paint Nueva had used before, which will certainly be good on your reports– and Miguel ended up getting the rest he needed.
You had pulled up a chair for him long ago, and he took it without a word. Slumped against your lab station, each time you’d try to pull away from him he’d mumble out a little, “no, please– stay here.” with his eyes still fluttered shut. He didn’t drool or snore, in fact it was a bit concerning how quiet he was as slumber took him. Almost like a vampire in his coffin, the idea of Miguel dressing up as Dracula made you stifle a laugh against the back of your free hand. Maybe you’d have to convince him to dress up for the next corporate Halloween event, as silly as it would be.
Miguel’s brow furrowed ever so slightly, mumbling out incoherency as your hand anchored him to this world. The light reminder of success infiltrated your senses as the smell of beeswax and linseed oil– honey and lemon. You’d already be on your way back home if Miguel didn't have his fingers intertwined with yours, murmuring things you’d never imagine him to say. It made your stomach churn, a wobbly smile meeting your lips as you laughed off his sleepy nonsense.
The fun ended too quickly it felt, as he suddenly stretched and groaned– his hand pulling you a little with him. The weight on him snapped him awake, senses kicking into overdrive to clear his confusion. Once he realized he was in the safety of the lab he shared with you, Miguel visibly relaxed. When his gaze met your interlocked fingers, he almost fell out of his chair.
Miguel whispers out your name in an embarrassed mess, wrapping his free hand around his mouth in an attempt to calm himself down. But you merely hummed an automatic response, and he couldn’t help but shake the thoughts clouding his consciousness. You were affecting him in a way that almost left him frozen, emotions that felt close to a high rushed into his brain and messed with any rationality he was able to clutch. Miguel’s claws he kept at bay threatened to unsheathe into your knuckles as warmth painted his features into an unbearable heat.
By the time he had fully woken up, you were dozing off yourself. 
Elbow propped against the counter while your head rested on your hand, drool etched the side of your lips as the world of dreams scooped you up and cradled you lovingly. You were blissfully aware of the carnal gaze of your lab partner, soaking in your soft, resting expression like a full-course meal. His heart ached painfully at a small snore that escaped his lips.
When it came to you, it’s almost as if he had a bad case of cute aggression on top of the painful crush that held him in a chokehold.
Every brush of your shoulder meeting his own short circuited his every thought, shocking his cold attitude into a soft spot for you. Every graze upon his hands, with that mouth of yours snapping at him with a certain playfulness, had him melting against you like putty. And here you were, spending the night with him in the stiff chairs of the lab simply because he had told you to in his exhausted stupor. 
Miguel almost hyperventilated at how nice you were to him, grasp tightening on your hand every so slightly. He wanted all of you, he realized, as his lips came into contact with your knuckles. 
Were you as sweet as always with the others in your shared department? Did you give them a piece of your mind, but then turned around with open arms and a hug when something went right? Did you share your secrets in the comfort of being busy, finding companionship with the one helping you who wasn’t him?
Miguel kissed your finger-tips as a soft gasp escaped your drooling lips, breathing in your scent like it was keeping him from unravelling altogether. The thoughts of someone else so close to you made his skin crawl and the urge to dig his claws within flesh. An insistent voice growled in the back of his head, “protect, closer, closer, need.”
It was his voice, snarling like a devil on his shoulder whenever he was clouded with your embrace. He craved your touch like it was a necessity to live, as important to breathe. His fangs trailed your wrist and your hold tightened onto his own hard instinctively. A pleased hum rolled off his tongue, you were just like a bunny caught into a trap. Prey at his mercy.
But he pulled away before he was too into his own head and did something he shouldn’t. Miguel wanted to see your nervous, wide-eyes gaze for himself when he offered to kiss you– or practically begged you to when the time came. In no way would he allow himself to take away a moment so special between the two of you.
So Miguel swiped away the drool dripping down your chin, bringing his thumb that delicately grazed your face onto his tongue and tasted your spit for himself. It was sweet, like you had just finished chewing down a piece of pink bubblegum hours ago– and that knowledge alone almost sent him off the edge of any human thought he had left.
So he collected himself, soothing out his lab coat before bringing a palm against his hair to smooth it back out. With a light smile and a deep breath, he invaded your space with a gentleness that rivalled a melodious tune.
Shaking you awake, Miguel brought his claws to your hair and raked through the curls. The action took you both by surprise, by you couldn’t help but purr a sleepy “hello, silly,” at the sight of waking up to his sleep-ridden self. He only chuckled, a red painting his ears that you couldn’t see.
“Hello to you too, mi corazón. I’ll help you get home.”
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thebibliosphere · 9 months
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Hi there, ive come from your post about ADHD and emotional disregulation, firstly thank you so much for putting it into words, its such a complicated part of how i deal with emotions and i havent ever been able to articulate how to why.
Secondly, in that post you mentioned how you've used stress as a motivator and how eventually your stress regualtion broke, i was wondering if you'd be willing to talk about that? (If not, its not a problem)
I feel like the same thing has happened to me but until i read your post i had no idea that something had... snapped? I suppose? I struggle with motivation all the time and in the past id have a week or a few days left and id be able to suddently push myself very hard to complete whatever it is before the deadline, just barely making it in most cases. However now it seems that i can't find that motivation anymore, deadlines come and pass and i can't being myself to work on anything, and i just end up spiralling into shame and guilt. That motivation was the only thing that I was able to rely on sometimes for things like uni, and i conviced myself that it was just me growing lazy or trying to get out of responsibility as to why the "last minute panic-mode" doesnt work anymore.
Again, if you don't wanna tackle this can of worms or if it's something youd rather not post online i totally get it, its no biggie! thanks so much for making the original post as well, it means a lot
Hello friend, thanks for the message. I'm sorry you're also dealing with this.
The good news here is that I've already talked about this using the rubber band analogy my therapist gave me. (Stress is like a Rubber Band)
If you don't have the mental bandwidth to read all of it now, the tl;dr is "stress is like a rubber band; it can stretch to hold numerous things in place when you need to, but if you do it too often or keep adding more and more strain under the band, the elastic eventually becomes brittle and snaps, taking your mental and sometimes physical health with it too."
I've been in intensive therapy for this for roughly three years now, and trying to piece my brain back together after my last bout of stress-induced productivity gave me a total mental breakdown.
It's... odd not being able to use stress and having to actively avoid it to avoid a relapse. But it is doable. Medication would help, but alas, I've got weird health issues and am unmedicated at the minute.
(And just in case that sparks anyone to go, "Oh, you do all this unmedicated! Wow, that's so inspiring!" as sometimes parents do to me on here as they then tell me they don't want to medicate their kids, I've unfortunately also written a post about what that kind of success looks like from an unmedicated perspective and the kind of suicidal ideation I deal with on the regular because I cannot take meds. It is not pleasant reading, but it is necessary for some folks, specifically anti-med, "if you just tried harder" people.)
A book you may find helpful is Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. It was very validating for me to read about other people going through the same things, and made me feel less of a "this is a personal failing on my part" and more of a "Oh okay yeah, no stress literally breaks people."
It helped soothe some of my own internalized "I just need to try harder" and helped cement me on the path I was already going down with my ADHD therapist toward changing how I view myself and how I manage my ADHD.
I hope that helps! If you've got more specific questions or I didn't touch on something in my old post, I can try to answer them :)
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monnn · 1 month
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Am I the greatest bastard that you know?
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staring: idol! jeonghan x non-idol!, gn! s/o
wc: 1.3k-ish
genre: ANGST. big angry feelings of reader, kinda fluff towards the end?
a/n: hi, ur fav angst lover is back! things have not been great lately and this fic might just be a vent of mine. big feelings and anger is very valid but so is taking a break. hope you realise that and take a break from life to just exist! to whoever's reading this, i love u, let things take time, take time for yourself, stay hydrated and BE ANGRY!!!
divider by @saradika-graphics !!!
song rec for this fic is The Greatest Bastard by Damien Rice!
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knowing how stressful going on a hiatus can be, you successfully lure jeonghan into a staycation, away from the city. though han had to be present for rehab, you had checked with the doctor and he was okay with han being away for a weekend. doing nothing was the plan since jeonghan was actively burning out from working hard to the extent that he's injured, so he was looking forward to spend time with his loved one for a while. what neither of you knew was the fight that would gonna pop up at reaching the room. hannie had drove all the way to the hotel since you didn't have a license and all you had done after reaching there was ask what he wanted to eat since y'all had skipped the rest stops.
~ 30 mins before
"hey love, what do you feel like eating? i could order it for us" you ask a very eepy han.
"just anything, i'm okay with anything" he replies and you can sense the exhaustion in his voice. to make sure you don't get him more grumpy, you ask again to confirm if he's sure about his decision.
"jesus y/n! can you cut me some slack? just stop fucking bothering me and order whatever the fuck you want!" he yells, shaking you to the core.
here's the thing - there necessarily hasn't been any major disagreements or "fights" in your relationship, so the intensity of his feelings get to you. but he should've known better than to snap because your rage knows no bounds and hannie does know about this.
"well, fuck you with that behaviour of yours, i'm not gonna be ordering any food!"
"good! because i don't fucking need it anymore either!" he screams, walking away from the room. you had put great effort in picking a room which is right by a stream, surrounded by mountains and a temple on one of the mountains.
trying not to mind the rage and disappointment with han, you chug a glass of water before doing anything. but you weren't gonna let han off the hook because he was having a hard time. the value you hold for yourself is much more important and you've tried so hard to just have that value in your life for so long, hence you are not going to let the love of your life doubt on it. finishing another glass of water, you leave the room in search of hannie with some snacks and a drink.
you are yet find han with the passing time. he wasn't by the stream, hadn't left the premises according to the owner and definitely hadn't hiked up a mountain(cause bro was literally eepy). but the one place you hadn't scraped was the temple, so you hydrate and go on to check if he's there.
in fact, he is there. his silhouette seems regretful. melancholic even. hunched over and zoning out by overthinking. you stomp your way towards the temple, letting him know of your arrival as he fixes his posture and keeps his gaze down. leaving your shoes behind, you enter the temple and kneel infront of han to provide well-needed snacks and water. he whispers a small 'thank you' and you move aside to sit away from him. not that you wanted to, rather wanting to just talk without any physical contact. you see him chug the water and eat his snacks, making a part of you feel relieved. after finishing his nibbles, han thinks he's ready to talk cause he knows it's better to do this right now than to dwell and let it become bigger.
"y/n, i'm sorry. i am not gonna reason myself for my actions towards you but i do wanna let you know i'm really tired. probably beyond exhaustion. i love you but that was really wrong of me to behave that way when you were just trying to make me feel better." he begins.
"okay, i accept your apology. but i'm not sorry because i haven't done anything wrong. and i'm gonna have to get this off my chest cause if i don't say it now, it's just gonna grow and rot in me." you say, stretching out your hand for him to hold. hannie slips his palm in yours and there's a little squeeze from both of you before letting go.
"okay, i'm gonna listen what you have to say and i'm sure i'll have things to say after, but i'm gonna listen to you first." he says, reassuring you.
"thank you. i hope you know that i was just trying to be of help and not a bother. you snapping at me was unnecessary, which you know by now and it scared me han. for a moment, you were an angry stranger to me and it made me so angry too. why? because i don't deserve to be treated like this han, you know how hard life has been and still is for me." you pause, taking a deep breath as you feel tears welling up your eyes. but one look at hannie and you know he's making space for your anger, willing for you to continue.
shit, you really do love him.
"i understand how mentally and physically exhausting things have been for the past week or so. i understand so much han, i really do. but that does not give you any leverage to be rude or angry at me. regardless of the terrible things i deal with in my life, i'm really trying to be positive towards our relationship and this unconsciously might've broken a part of me. maybe i'm being dramatic but my feelings are big and valid. i love you but we'll need to work on this at our own pace, yeah? what do you think?" you finish, catching a breath that you didn't realise was held.
jeonghan takes a deep breath, before he begins. taking one look at you, he fidgets with his phone and tries to talk cause he has to start somewhere.
"firstly, i am really sorry love. i wanna let you know that i regret my actions and shouldn't have behaved that way towards you. it's just been really hard for me to go into a break from being so packed with schedules. i don't think i've rested at all since i started working and it's just a lot. it's a lot because i now am realising the importance of rest and that solely is beyond overwhelming. but now that i'm here, i want to make the best of it and spend as much time as i can with the people i love. again, i can't think of anything other than apologising because you don't deserve that. i have no right to be treating you that way when you've put your complete trust and love in me. i'm so sorry again love, i want to work on this. i'm not sure how but i wanna work on us, with you. i love you." he finishes, letting out a loud sob. you hold yourself back from going and holding him cause he needs this more than anything else.
instead you move next to him, taking one of his hands in yours. hannie turns to look at you and lays his head on your shoulder, not caring about drenching your shirt. you gently caress his hand as he calms down and give him some water to hydrate. disconnecting from your hand, he drinks the water and wipes his face but intertwines your arm in both of his the moment he's done. there's a moment of stillness felt, as he leans onto your shoulder, nuzzling further into your neck. you haven't felt this feeling ever and just being present makes you realise that there is always space to be wrong and learn in love. not sure if it's the same with everyone else, but you know for sure it is with jeonghan.
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villainousauthor · 7 days
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Part one
Hero is sitting on the hardwood floors of the living room, as they pass another block to their baby.
She takes it with a giggle, stacking it atop the other ones. Hero can't help but grin at how much this activity is entertaining her, and them as well.
"She's getting good with those blocks."
Hero jumps at the sudden sound of Villain's voice behind them. They must have snuck in through the balcony again. Villain comes and sits next to Hero with an annoying grin.
"You need to stop sneaking up on me like that! And you need to stop breaking in." Hero exclaims, shoving Villain's shoulder.
Instead of immediately responding, Villain feigns hurt.
"Ow! Not in front of the kid, what are you teaching her about hitting?" Villain teases with a snicker before answering seriousness. "You can't come out and fight with me anymore -"
"I have an infant to take care of."
"-I understand why, but that just means I have to come annoy you here now." Villain finishes like Hero didn't interrupt. Hero rolls their eyes at this. They've been coming regularly now for the past few months, never knocking, just letting themselves in. So irritating.
The baby crawls across the floor to where both Hero and Villain sit, having forgotten about her blocks. For a moment, Hero thinks their child is crawling to them until she makes a beeline for Villain. Not surprising, Villain has quickly become a favorite for the young child.
'Betrayed by my own kin.' Hero thinks quietly, shaking their head.
Hero can't pretend they haven't been of help, though, with how they seem to so naturally know how to care for the baby. Hero still wonders how they know so much about child care, but Villain won't divulge. At the very least, the extra pair of hands has taken some burden off Hero's shoulders.
They watch as Villain reaches for her, another one of those rare genuine smiles on their face they only ever seem to show while here. Hero tries to ignore how it makes their heart beat faster.
"You're getting so good at crawling." Villain coos, picking the baby up gently. "At least someone is happy to see me here." Villain says humorously.
"I bet it's the only time anyone is happy to see you." Hero replies, though their tone isn't as serious, and they scoot closer to Villain.
"Heh, probably." Villlain shakes their head, still smiling, though as they hold the baby.
Hero feels the same questions burning in the back of their mind again, curiosity eating them up from the inside. They know Villain is unlikely to answer and will dodge the question again like always, but Hero can't help but ask.
"Are you a parent, Villain?" Hero's voice is quiet as they ask, soft as they bring up the subject. They've never asked so directly before, and for a split moment, they think they see a flash of sadness on Villain's face.
Before they can respond, though, the baby makes a noise, spitting up directly on Villain's shirt. Hero immediately comes and takes the infant into their arms.
"I'm so sorry!" Hero's voice is apologetic, as they look to make sure their baby is okay. Villain is unphased, though, as they smirk.
"Don't worry about it." They look to how she immediately smiles up with those chubby baby cheeks and dimples at both of them. "She thinks that's funny. You're raising a little mini villain, Hero." Villain's voice is full of amusement. Hero rolls their eyes as they stand.
"I can wash that for you if want, I think I have a spare shirt in about your size." They offer, still feeling bad. They set the baby in her play pin as they lead Villain through the house to their bedroom. Hero paws through their dresser until they find the shirt.
Turning around, they find Villain is already removing their own shirt, and Hero tries not to pay attention to the curve and contour of their toned body. Flushing red, Hero thrusts the shirt in their direction, averting their gaze.
Villain takes it, chuckling at their reaction.
"You really don't have to apologize. You have an adorable kid." Villain's voice is softer than normal.
Smiling gently, Hero nods. This is something they both can agree on. "Yeah, she is."
"I have no idea where she gets it from." Villain continues, teasing in their tone evident. Hero pushes their shoulder in retaliation.
"I happen to be adorable as hell."
Villain takes Hero's hand and pulls them close. "You're just hot. There's a difference." Their voice is low and rumbling.
Stomach fluttering, Hero can't help the heat rising up their neck. This has also been happening frequently, Villain's teasing and flirtatious comments. Hero can't tell if they actually mean it or are trying to get a reaction.
Hero doesn't know how to respond, always replying to their teasing words with flustered laughter or deadpan replies. When they don't respond, Villain continues speaking.
"I'll come back later to return your shirt." Their voice still has that playful air, but they look a little dejected. They turn to presumably climb back out the balcony like a maniac.
Before they can think otherwise, Hero grabs them by the elbow, their skin soft and warm under theirs.
"Wait- you don't have to leave." Their voice is still sounding flustered as they speak in a rush. "You should stay. If you want.."
Villain's resulting smile has their heart quickening. "I couldn't say no to spending more time with my favorite ankle bitter. Or to annoying you some more." Their voice is light and joking as they head out of the bedroom, back towards the living room.
"Have you ever thought about having any more?" Villain asks suddenly, as Hero follows after.
They haven't really thought about this. The kid they have now is already a handful, but the mental image of a big family is an endearing one.
"I haven't really thought about it," Hero says, picking their infant up from her pen. "Why do you ask?"
Villain leans in close, offering a finger to the baby. They smile as she grabs it, before looking up to Hero's eyes. Their gaze is full of warmth and amusement, and something else that gives Hero butterflies. Villain's voice is warm and flirtatious when they speak.
"We could have some cute babies."
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My little girl || Jake Sully
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Jake Sully x Daughter! Reader
Summary: Where Jake realizes that you're not his little girl anymore and you're an adult now.
Note: Sorry for spelling and grammatical errors, English is not my first language. <3
The truth is that I didn't like it very much, I like the idea but not how I planted it here.
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Your delicate steps did not go unnoticed by your mother neytiri who immediately stood up from her seat to greet you with her arms crossed while your brothers and father looked in your direction.
"Where have you been?" was the first thing she asked when she saw you "Where and with whom?" asked Jake from his seat.
Well, you had two choices; one was to lie and say you were alone taking a walk on the nice reef, the other was to tell the truth and say you were with a handsome Metkayina taking a walk.
Clearly you were going to lie.
"I was taking a walk, mommy" You replied giving her an innocent wink. You got a scoff from Neteyam who already knew the truth, and as he was on the ground with your foot you hit him on his knee getting a grunt from him.
"Well, I hope you won't lie to me" your mother warned "We don't know the clan well, you can't always walk alone, it can be dangerous" Your heart skipped a beat because you were lying to him, but you didn't want them to meddle, you were already 18.
"Yes, mommy" You said hugging her. "Yes, sure. A walk alone" Lo'ak said as you sat down next to her "Stop bothering your sister" Jake warned her "If she says she was walking alone, it's because she was walking alone".
Your eyes shifted to your father who was staring at you waiting for a comment on the matter, but you felt bad about lying so you just nodded at him leaving him in doubt.
(...)
The outings with Eykxä had been frequent. Your curious brothers already knew about your encounters and always tried to cover for you by saying that you were in other activities with the clan.
That very day your idea was to go out with Eykxä in the middle of the night, but you didn't count that your father was already suspicious of your outings. He was more worried about you than anything else, you were his little girl, well not so little but always his little girl. He had a certain weakness for you being his firstborn, so when he saw your escapades he wanted to know why.
I wish he hadn't.
While everyone was asleep you went out as quietly as you could to a hidden spot on the reef where Eykxä was sitting in front of the colorful fish.
"Hey, I thought you would be later" He said as he patted the side next to him for you to sit down. "I was able to leave earlier today" You replied as you sat down "Everyone was really tired so I was able to leave earlier."
"I'm glad, more time to enjoy your company" He told you, then brushed a lock of hair behind your ear, an action that made your cheeks warm and you smiled shyly at him "Yes, much more time"
Hours you spent together with his company, not realizing that Jake in just minutes found you and realized something.
You grew up, and you were an adult.
(…)
Well, you didn't know why your father was ignoring you but you couldn't let it go. He had been distant the previous days and even your neytiri mother didn't know the reason.
"But mom, he really hasn't said anything to you?" You asked her as she took care of braiding your hair "No, my love. He hasn't told me anything but if you want I can ask him again."
"No, I'll do it" you told her, looking up at Kiri who was standing next to you playing with your fingers "daddy is outside, he said he needed a break" Kiri told you without taking her eyes off your fingers, "See if you can catch up"
That's what you did after your mother finished braiding your hair and you thanked her, you headed straight to your father who was sitting with Tuk on his lap while tickling him.
You smiled because your father often played with you when you were little (clearly I'm going to write about that).
"Hi daddy, hi Tuk. baby, can you go to mommy?" You said stroking her hair "Hi, but I'm playing" She says while pouting "Please" You beg her, and like the good and tender one she is she kissed goodbye and ran off to neytiri.
"Hi, dad" You repeat since he hadn't greeted back "Hi" Dry, not even a hello with your name. "I think we need to have a talk" You told him dentándote at his side "I don't know what's wrong with you, you've been distant these days. I don't remember doing anything to deserve this, dad."
Your words made your father reason, but the feeling that you were already an adult, that you would start isolating yourself from the family broke his heart. He didn't mean to be that way, but he was also hurt that you didn't trust him to tell him your love situation.
"I saw you, the other day I followed you because I found your attitude suspicious. You started smiling more, you were often distracted or your escapades at night. I'm your father, you clearly didn't go out alone, I know you" He said intertwining his fingers with yours "You're my baby, you always have been and always will be. It's hard for me to accept that you're a woman now. That you're not my little girl anymore."
"I always will be, Daddy. Sorry if I didn't tell you, I didn't know how you or mom might react" You excused yourself "I'm in love, it's so easy everything with him/her. I feel good" You told him shyly.
"I think I should have waited for you to tell me before I acted like this, I'm sorry my girl" He told you "I know it's time for you to meet people outside of us, but you are my girl and it's hard for me."
He slipped one of his arms around your shoulders to pull you to his body and kiss your head "I won't intrude anymore baby, I'm sorry for my behavior, it wasn't apt. I love you, my no longer little girl" He said smiling at you with his most paternal smile.
"I love you too, daddy."
"Your brothers did know about this, am I right?" He asked after a few minutes. "Yes, they did."
"Little traitors."
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ghostlythunderbird · 1 year
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Omegaverse ~ Task Force 141+ Alejandro, Rodolfo, König
Warnings: Mostly SFW with a dash of NSFW (MINORS BEGONE)
Author Notes: These are gonna be short and I apologize for it but YALL THE WRITING JUICE IS DRYING UP, so once again I'm sorry. These are also my own interpretations of these characters but feel free to add on top of them. I also wanna thank @l-lend and @kelpiesummer for helping me with these, your honor I love them both.
Before we begin I would like to go over some baseline stuff to this:
In Military pack dynamics there is a Lead Alpha and a Lead Beta, and if the Alpha isn't present it is the Beta’s duty to oversee the safety of the pack.
Apex Alphas do exist here but they only make up 10% of the population, and are often ridiculed due to them being able to control a vast majority of Alphas. They are also much stronger and much bigger than regular Alphas with much stronger instincts. In modern society it's often damning should one be born an Apex because they often have to wear muzzles in public because of their unpredictability.
An Apex’s muzzle is only taken off when they are alone, mated, or receive immunity by extended military service to prove they are not a danger to anyone.
To add on about an Apex, their Ruts become stronger the longer they don't relieve built up tension over time. It has even been recorded that Apexes with no outlet have often become feral and cannot be helped out of a feral state. All Apexes MUST have a physical outlet to reduce built up tension.
All dynamics are able to become Feral, and in this universe there is not enough data to help an individual out of said feral state and will have to be sent to a designated center for proper care.
Apexes, Alphas, and Omegas are able to control themselves decently should a Rut or Heat arrive. Should one help out with these times, consent must be given beforehand and with a trusted individual. Not everyone here is driven to wackiness because of hormones
In the Military, there are often teams that are used for Ruts and Heats of all calibers, they are made up of trained Betas and are the only ones allowed to handle single Apex, Alpha, and Omega dynamics who are in a Heat or Rut.
Simon “Ghost” Riley
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Simon I feel like would be an Alpha, simply because of his size and his ability to lead soldiers like a well oiled machine. He didn't start feeding into his alpha nature until he joined the Royal Army after the attacks on 9/11, mostly because his father would punish him and his family should anyone try to stand up to him. Once Simon completed his training he shows his father what a true Alpha is and acts like, and ends up kicking him out of the house before assuming the role as the protector of his family.
After losing his family and “Simon Riley” being now pronounced dead he started to hide his true nature and his scent. While his scent is practically nonexistent it didn't stop him from the commanding and somewhat protective nature of his inner Alpha. In the Ghost’s mind, no scent and repressing that inner Alpha, is the best way to begin a nonexistent life; to become nothing more but a living shadow.
In a Rut:
To describe Simon in a rut would be a very self protective Alpha, not wanting anyone with a 5 mile radius near him to ensure no one discovers his identity. And in order to safeguard that fact he ends up going to a secluded safehouse far from base to ensure not a single person can find him in such a vulnerable state. During this time he does believe it's better for him to be alone as the worry of losing himself after being pent up for so long could only cause him more trouble on top of someone finding out Simon Riley isn't as dead as they claim.
But to say he's a virgin would be a complete lie, he’s been with omegas before and many were in heat so he understands a little about omegas but nothing really outside a heat. With that being said he often craves an omega during his ruts, but after becoming the Ghost he doesn't actively seek them anymore. But if he did have an omega (maybe even you) helping him out he would definitely be very dominant, constantly on lookout after having sated both his needs and whoever is helping him. If you're close with him, he begins to show a more doting characteristic that he claims isn't there such as getting you what snack you're craving or bringing in more blankets for your heat nest.
John “Soap” MacTavish 
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Now this Scott probably doesn't strike you as an Alpha, but I assure you he is 100% Alpha blood though and through. Johnny is definitely a more playful alpha compared to the rest of his team but that doesn't stop him from trying to get them to loosen up and have fun. He's even been told many didn't think he was an Alpha at their first introduction, with his fun and very caring personality he's been more mistaken as an Omega rather than an Alpha.
But that never once hurt his feelings, and has even offered to show he’s the real deal if you catch my drift. It also means he loves to show off to whoever might be watching whether they are Male, Female, Omega, Alpha, or even a Beta. His only hard NO would be an Apex of any gender, he may not have met any but there is definitely a stereotype amongst Apexes.
In a Rut:
Before anyone starts to make assumptions that he's pretty dominant in bed and during a rut that's only a half truth. While yes his body is telling him to dominate during that time he isn't fully into it, he is actually more of a switch and can be pretty needy during this time. He wants to cuddle about 90% of the time because the skin on skin helps bring his brain back to a safe place where hormones don't dictate his every move.
Johnny definitely isn't a virgin and has actually had many partners of all second genders besides apexes in his bed at least once. He can definitely say he knows his way around anybody that decides to help him in a rut but once he's sated it's straight pampering for his partner. Once you get to know him better he actually wants to play fight with you more after you're both satiated for a bit, Johnny claims it's to help build a bond between the two for you.
Kyle “Gaz” Garrick 
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Before anyone yells at me for making Gaz a Beta hear me out. In a pack like Task Force 141 there needs to be a Lead Alpha and a Lead Beta that takes up for the Lead Alpha should they not be present in a situation. But our sweet Kyle definitely is the voice of reason between the original four, should the Alpha’s hormones and instincts cloud one's judgment Kyle would help set the record straight and see both sides to the coin. He’s definitely the more laid back one of the group but he can get a little wild should he need to, I mean the guy was hanging upside down under a helicopter while going down an active highway.
While he might be the more laid back one, that doesn't exactly mean he isn't a little trickster. He likes to rile Soap up before he gets told to stop which often leads to someone getting sent to the medbay, while he does mess with Ghost and Price he doesn't take it too far because not only are they Alphas they also happen to be higher in the chain of command. Kyle has stated before that it's just easier to pick on Johnny because they are both the same rank, and that Soap is the one who actually wants to up the intensity or stakes to whatever they are doing.
I'm just gonna add this in on this part to say since Betas don’t have Heats or Ruts I won't have a Rut part for Gaz. But that doesn't mean that this man doesn't get any. To anyone who has ever met him, they can say he’s super helpful during those times and has even offered to help should they need it. But that is only to a select few, he mostly just makes sure you don't die from starvation or dehydration and will even run messages and updates back and forth on whatever you want to know or need during that time.
John Price
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Our captain in tight fitting camo is not just an Alpha he's The Alpha of Task Force 141, his presence is calm yet demanding attention from anyone who crosses his path. That being said, he isn't one to outright snap at anyone who gets on his nerves, but rather lets them make a fool of themselves. He will only ever step in if his team or his own safety starts being questioned around an individual or in a certain area. He is always aware of everyone under his charge and does the best he can to ensure they all make it back home safe, although they aren't scratch less sometimes but alive nonetheless.
While John is a leader and an officer he makes sure he has an end time to the mountains of paperwork on his desk. Should he have someone at home waiting for him, he makes sure to keep them updated on his whereabouts but once he's in the security of his own four walls his top priority is only them. John has been known to go off the radar sometimes while at home, but it's mostly because when he's home he doesn't want work knocking at his door when he's got other priorities. Overall this man is sweet as he can be, in his own rough way, and all he ever really wants to do is just love and pamper his mate like it might be the last time.
In a Rut:
Right off the bat he tells you he might be a bit much during this time of the year, but it's much more different than what you'd expect from an Alpha of his standing. While most of the time he's peachy with being the dominant one in bed, if the Rut is strong and he just came home all he wants is for you to take control. He will mostly complain that it's because he's “Getting old as crap” but you set that aside and simply say it's ok to let someone else take control. John just wants to be pampered in his Ruts mostly because every other time he has to be taking care of someone else.
Now if he goes into Rut while he's on extended leave and has the energy of a young buck, better buckle up then honey cause you're just gonna have to ride it out. The easiest way to say what he is in bed would be a switch but personally it isn't that simple. Personally I do believe that John can be dominant but with his line of work and his responsibilities it takes it out of him even with a rut, he wants to be dominant but simply put the man is tired most of the time. So in order to make up for it he is very caring of his partner, he wants to provide and protect his partner. John is by far one of the sweetest Alphas out there but don't tell anyone that, he has a reputation to uphold back on base.
Alejandro Vargas
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This FINE Latino man is without a doubt an Alpha, with his ability to be both cunning and devious in his line of work he can make sure the job is done. While he might be unforgiving to his enemies, anyone that is a previous lover or his mate can say that he is a hopeless romantic. He showers and pampers his lovers with anything they could ever desire, Alex wants to show that he is a perfect caregiver and provider to their needs.
While he might not be a stereotypical Alpha, he can still effectively protect his mate and his pack should some catch the wrong side of him. He’s a protector and has even said that he “Will fight to his very last breath as long as it means you are all protected in the end.'' With that it's easy to say Alejandro is a very selfless person to those he trusts and will ensure all are properly protected and provided for should they come under his protection and care as the Lead Alpha.
In a Rut:
Imma say it now, Alejandro actually feeds into that inner Alpha during this time. He wants to release all that built up tension into the form of rough sex should anyone help him out. He only ever has someone with him if he knows it's bad and has no mate or anyone special, but if he does have a mate they are gonna be covered in bruises and love bites and probably bred after it. Also without a doubt he's bound to become more aggressive than normal, but again he is simply acting on instincts. However that aggression will never be used against you that could potentially hurt you.
Maybe after a few rounds Alejandro does feel like he's able enough to check on his partner, he goes to town should they need aftercare, snacks, or a shower. He kisses on deep bruises he's left along your skin, helps wash your hair and body, even makes sure you're properly fed even if he's the one who is in Rut.
Rodolfo Parra
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Once again please no one yell at me for this decision, but I do feel like Rudy would also be a Beta as he works closely with Colonel Vargas as his second in command. After growing up with Alejandro, they both decided to stay together after their basic training and fight for justice in Las Almas. Wherever you see Alejandro, Rodolfo is never far behind updating the Lead Alpha should news come up over the radios from their team.
Rudy is also more alongside the more nurturing nature, he wants his team safe and will do anything to protect them. His team is his Pack and without them Rudy has nothing left, that being said he tries to improve whatever he can as the Lead Beta for Los Vaqueros. I can also say without a doubt Rudy is also the most loving person to whoever is his mate, but this isn't one sided as he also wants all the love and adoration from his mate just as much. He is a lover by nature but he also wants to be bathed and be told that he is doing a good job and a lover and a mate.
And while again Rudy may be a Beta and doesn't have a Rut it doesn't mean he is inexperienced, He chooses to wait and is actually very selective of potential partners that he shares such intimate moments with. But if you ask Alejandro he can tell you Rudy has had some drunken one night stands that makes the Beta beat red at just their mentioning.
König
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Our lorge Austrian man here is one of the lesser known dynamics that makes up only 10% of the world's population; An Apex. Truly it's no surprise that this man right here would be anything less, but in König’s personal opinion it's nothing but a curse. Ever since he presented he was mocked and shamed for his second gender, it was much worse when the government sent his family a muzzle for him to wear in public. It was nothing short of humiliating, it even was something else for him to be bullied for. The bullying was also the reason why  König has deep scars around his face from the muzzle digging in, some of them because his bullies often pulled on the straps to where it was too tight.
Over the years König became more and more anxious around others, there were very limited times the large man would go out into public because he knew people would turn him away simply for his second gender. And due to the large amount of prejudice it was hard to find both a pack and a mate that would accept him, that was until you barreled into his life (literally) that he felt like someone would love him. He's a very caring Apex that goes above and beyond for his mate, there were often times he would stay on his knees and would hardly make eye contact with you. His worst fear is you realizing you don't want an Apex as a mate and leaving, he honestly thinks his heart would stop beating if you did.
In a Rut:
Now this is where he really fears himself most of all. His ruts were strong and they only continued to grow the longer he kept denying himself release with someone else. But when he was assigned to KorTac they allowed him an alternative way to help him during ruts, by sending him on solo operations to let loose on the supposed targets. But again all this was before you showed up.
After you started to share Ruts and Heats together you realized that an Apex was really just a bigger Alpha, and one who wanted nothing more to provide for you. Now while I love König being an absolute sweetheart, that's not how he is during a Rut. König is demanding and can often be rough the first few times but it's only because he never had someone to spend it with, he does end up becoming much softer and sweeter after a while. You thought König was a big soft boi during this time for your first few couplings, nope his brain is empty besides the words Mate, Breed, and Protect for an entire week (good luck walking after that). And if anyone thinks otherwise y'all meet me in the Burger King parking lot at midnight.
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kedreeva · 4 months
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The person I love left my life this year.
For a while back then I wasn't really sure I wanted to survive, but having a history of depression helped me realise what was happening, so I finally decided to go to therapy for the first time ever. I'm proud of myself for 1) realising the danger in time 2) sticking through therapy despite how hard it is for me 3) getting to the point where I am not in active danger anymore!
This year was not kind to me in several other aspects, and yet: 1) I discovered loose-leaf tea!! It helps with a lot of things 2) as a side-effect of therapy, I am opening up more to people, and this means that I actually now have more friendly acquaintances than ever! May I have a photo of Stan and his beautiful train? I also love Bug and Indy, but Stan is my favourite!! <3 <3 <3 Thank you so much!
Congratsssss I'm happy that you are here and getting help!!
I'm very sorry I cannot give you Stan's beautiful train, as it's winter and SOGGY right now, but please have a photo of this idiot after he attempted to take a dust bath in the MUD outside instead of the dry sand inside the coops:
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I had to rescue and clean him up, absolutely filthy wet beast hours over here.
Play the game!
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lovesickry · 7 months
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- let the light in.
┈⋆⭒ lando norris x rival femdriver!reader [2.4k] ┈⋆⭒ part 3 !
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ find all parts here! .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ contains: 18+, smut, swearing, angst, handjob LOL .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ a/n: sorry for my little hiatus I was really trying to think about what im trying to do with this story. .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ comment if you wanted be added to taglist
by all accounts Spain had been...interesting. considering the close proximity in which you came into with a certain man by which you (or at least thought) certainly disliked.
A sense of unease followed you in the coming week, a kind of distrust. With yourself? It was an odd feeling, unlikely to be exactly pinpointed so it was more or less thrust far back into your mind, his lingering, burning touch hopefully soon forgotten.
You were eager to more or less throw yourself into training, it was Monaco after all, the race every driver wanted to win. You were not an exception.
-
You saw Danny for dinner on Tuesday and it was actually very refreshing, you had taken some convincing (done by yours truly) to actually attend, by in doing so you did actually have a good time. He was Danny Ric of course you were gonna have a good time. Anyway, you were walking around Monaco much too late, talking about the season and actively trying to avoid any talk about his current teammate. He mentioned he was worried about you. 
“Why?”
“Oh just you know, sometimes I see a bit of myself in you and I know how I can get.” 
Your eyebrows furrowed, he cared so much. Danny had never been your teammate but youd drifted together through one force or the other and he'd been nothing but nice to you. You understood where he was coming from, you guess you were similar, the same kind of persistent optimism, sarcasm, devotion, not knowing when to stop pushing, problems of burning out etc; 
“I’m fine”
He waits for you to continue, you do.
“I mean, I think, it's just all a lot. I've wanted to be in Formula One for as long as I can remember and now that I’m here, it's still like everyday I'm fighting to be here. And it's not all just about being a girl either, like most of it is but still. It's like there's something inside me that's almost contradicting my existence, like I'm not meant to be here. It's pushing me forward and also pulling me back. I don't know how to explain it.”
You take a deep breath and try to keep your voice steady as you continue.
“There's just so much that I want to achieve and I don't even think I believe I can do it.”
Your voice wobbles only slightly as you pause walking and look at him, suddenly breathless.
He looks at you with so much understanding you could break down into tears. He extends an arm and pulls you into a side hug as he continues down the street slowly walking. 
“I think when you first do this that's how everyone feels, like they’re lying to themselves or that they don’t deserve it, but believe me when I tell you Dylan you are so deserving, more than so many drivers and you will get there. The isolation will dissipate and your body will realign and you’ll know what to do and how to do it and you’ll truly believe in yourself and your life won't be pushing and pulling at you anymore, i know its hard and i hate to say it, but time is truly your best friend in shit like this.”
You don't know how danny seemed to always know what to say but the words he spoke resonated with you and made something click, the rest of the walk home was lighter as you reached your hotel just after midnight, saying goodbye to Danny and watching him walk off into the lit streets of Monaco, quiet, peaceful and picturesque. You were amongst the other drivers who didn't (yet) live in Monaco, but you loved every moment you visited. Yes it was a posh persons wet dream, but it was undeniably beautiful in every part and you loved the safeness as a woman too. Though you'd have to admittedly work on your french.
When Thursday rolled around and you had to go to the track, ending your period of peace, it was  gratefully uneventful, not once did you see who you had prayed you wouldn’t and that was enough to leave the paddock with a smile. Friday was less than satisfying however, achieving not even in the top 10 in either practices. Saturday and Sunday, were thankfully a different story, you had qualified well, pulling your car into P4. You were happy, the car was happy and you were focused, the chat with Danny had made you in some way looser? 
You had mixed emotions about the part of the day in which you would attend the drivers parade. On one hand you could argue that it was a bit of a break from the seriousness, a time where drivers genuinely just chat shit while people look on and occasionally get asked questions, but on the other you could also argue that its kinda pointless and stupid. Regardless all the drivers piled into the moving vehicle and settled into a chatter of conversation in their respective “groups”. Just by your luck, as you eased into a conversation with Danny and George, Lando decided to join in. You didn’t ignore the look up and down he gave you before swiftly intervening in the conversation. For some reason the minute Lando joined in you were mute, not cintrivuting to the conversation in the slightest bit, other than nudging Danny every now and again to point something/someone out. You spoke few words with Lando present and even fewer when prompted by him to speak. At a point George simply dragged you away and talked to you one of one to save the awkward silence that seemed to surround the you and Lando. You had never found George unattractive, but at the same time you werent attracted to him either, which you thought in the moment he wasnt understand, as everything he said he would lean closer, almost intimate. Not too obvious, not romantic, but obvious enough, atleast to you and the eyes that you felt bore into the back of your head from a certain McLaren driver. Waling through the paddock following the drivers parade was always an ordeal, fans were out and you signed caps and shirts and skin and took photos, before finally making it anywhere near your garage. That was a part of the fun honestly, you always thought: The fans. You hear familiar voices and try not to eavesdrop, though subconsciously straining to hear, it's muffled and you only make out. “Shes not” “Dude” “fuck” “embarassing” “gross” “come on?” “you jealous?” your spying however is put to an end when none other than George Russel and Lando Norris round the corner to where you stood or recently stood, because as soon as you heard shuffling you resumed movement so they didn’t know that you were really just standing there listening to whatever the fuck they were saying.
“Speak of the devil” Lando says with a smirk.
You don't fully register the meaning behind that line however, still relishing in the fact they didn't know of your habit to eavesdrop. 
“You're such a twat” George says, and more or less storms off.
You watch as he goes, still silent and then turn towards Lando. 
“You’re actually such a dickhead ”
Lando scoffs before continuing.
“I was the one defending your dignity, George was drooling at you, its embarrassing”
You raise your eyebrows at him
“George?”
“Oh come on you're not that naive, he's so into you it's disgusting.”
“piss off”
“No seriously Mr Russell was in a seductive mood” it's said with an air of humour and you nearly laugh. 
“George was trying to seduce me?” you let a deep breath out of your noise, nearly letting loose a laugh.
“And how exactly would he go about that huh?” you continue sarcastically.
‘Hmmm” his eyebrows straighten and his whole face looks as though it changes composition.
You move to go, sick of whatever the fuck Lando wants to play with you, you round the corner, reaching a small end of a hallway with no current people near and suddenly hes there too. Lips grazing the top of your ear. His body was against yours and radiating with heat, breath fanning your temple. 
“Like this?” his voice is too fucking low, too fucking delicious and your mind is begging for you to succumb, but you cant, you wont.
“Youre a fucking asshole” its said through your teeth and you dont make any action to move your body away from his.
He hummed in response, simply moving his breaths down your neck.
“You mean it?” a smirk paints his face
“I hate you” the words come out more breathless than you'd hoped.
He laughs into the skin of your neck, you're still not moving, unable to move. In fear giving into him. 
You close your eyes in hopes to centre yourself but it's impossible to ignore the heat that seems to surround you, your blood flows like molten lava through your veins and every breath is staggered and fractured. Opening your eyes was a mistake, Lando is looking at you with someone that could be moulded into admiration and his pupils are blown. You can't stop the way your back arches to meet him and suddenly your hands are in his curls and his mouth is on yours. It is so sweet, so filthy, so hateful. The way your mouths are moving against each other, his hands grasping at your back while you pull at his hair, you notice as you pull away the way he bites his lip, as if to not make any noise. 
Well that's rich, he doesn't get to pretend he hasn't been the one chasing after you, acting all shitty just cause you’ve been the only girl not to fall to your feet at the sight of him.
He deserved a taste of his own medicine, you moved your lips off his and his eyes widened slightly thinking you're stopping whatever this was. Not yet. You move your lips down to his necks and begin to kiss him until you reach where he tenses at, figuring that's your best shot. You find the spot just above his clavicle and he inhales sharply before biting his lip. You were getting somewhere, focusing on this singular spot had Lando more desperate than before, biting so hard on his lip you thought it might bleed and gripping your waist so tightly you thought it might bruise if he adjusted his grip anymore. 
The next idea that hit you was albeit self-indulgent but you thought would get your point across, or atleast suffice some of Lando’s infatuation with you just enough to clear your mind of him.
While one of your hands holds firmly his curls while you kiss his neck fervently, your other hand drops down further, trailing over the muscle that lay taut and hot underneath his fireproofs. His throat bobbed and he threw his head back only slightly, making an incoherent noise that made you smile against his neck, his control lost and gained so fast. Soon after your other hand left the back of his head, he dropped it onto your shoulder, still fiercely remainly quiet as you moved the other hand down his back, both hands reached under the material at the same time and his body was hotter than you had ever thought possible, retaining so much heat you are surprised there wasn't some kind of steam coming off of his skin. You pull his race suit down lower so it meets his middle thighs, his forehead still resting on your shoulder, keeled over. Pulling the material of his fireproofs up so you could actually see the muscle that was residing under there was fucking awe-inspiring, the small gap that you allowed yourself to see, breathing hard and fast, watching the muscle, the skin go out and in which each breath, you were nearly hypnotised. 
“Im not gonna fucking beg tait”
His voice is rough but fractured and static, not portraying the toughness you think he’d like it too. It's your turn to hum in response as you move your hands achingly lower to where he is painfully and unbearingly hard for anything you do. The minute your hand makes contact with the sensitive skin he gasps, you relish in the noise and you slowly move your hand around him, gathering the pre cum that coats the tip and focusing on it, slow moments make him shake and he's suddenly making small, consistent noises that only egg you on more. You hated to admit that the power in the movement was absolutely superb, enough to ignore the ache between your own legs. You twist your hand slightly causing a strangled groan to come from Lando followed by a “fuck you” though its not too aggressive. You speed it up and soon he's breathing too fast, his eyes are fluttering and he’s so close. You position your hand and fingers at just the right part of him and he's coming hard and fast and hot and heavy in your palm. Followed by a deep, long breath and then a swift laugh. Lando Norris just came in your hand in his fucking racesuit. If that wasn’t karma that while he sung the national anthem he’d have cum in his fucking pants you didnt know what was. 
“That's for the crash and all the shit in the press.” you know how it must sound, that you'd just jerked him off and now you're labelling it as payback, but to the relationship that you both held it was pretty much just that. You slip out from under him, smoothing your hair and wiping your hands on his race suit. His face has fallen and hasn't moved, though he moves his arm to steady himself. 
You don't look back as you finally walk out of the corner of that measly little hallway, grateful that nobody happened upon you two. 
“Fuck you” its quiet but loud enough to hear and its almost….whiny? 
The ache between your legs has dissipated by the time you climb into the car, eager to get anything else into your head than the one that had been resting on your shoulder that day. 
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tag list:
@ssararuffoni, @eviethetheatrefreak, @fairiesdowntheroad, @landosgirlxoxo, @hiraethrhapsody, @hockeyboysarehot @mcmuppet @honethatty12 @darleneslane @formula1mount @borntogayz @kodzuvk @potatos-on-clouds @jullamy @taytaythirteen,@mrsmaybank13, @spiderrmoon, @giuliaabergaminii.@thenoblenomad, @luanemone, @spaceodd-ty, @aphroditeisamilf, @chonkybonky
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flickering-nightfall · 9 months
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I’m pretty sure that you made a post explaining why the arm is not the umbilical but I can’t find it, so, if you did make one, can you give a link to it? Sorry if you didn’t make one, I don’t have very good memory.
I'm not entirely sure which post that is but it sounds like something I'd ramble about? I have this post talking about making a 3D umbilical and this post talking about making a 3D arm with allusions to that buuut...
If that post doesn't exist then I'll make one right now!
Here, I made a diagram of terminology I use for the puppet/arm/umbilical structure. These terms aren't necessarily canon - they're just what I use.
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As for umbilicals being different from mechanical arms, it's an interpretation, I think. But there's reasons why I call them different things.
So first here's this Moon dialogue.
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(I think that's vanilla dialogue? The wiki confuses me sometimes. Link here if you want to see it yourself.)
We can assume from that dialogue that the wires + cord are the "umbilical." Moon's are obviously cut, but Pebbles' are not. And Moon's puppet is still attached to her mechanical arm.
(Lots more under the cut)
Umbilicals in real life resemble the wire/cord structure far more than the mechanical arm portion does. So that's another reason I refer to the wire/cord as the umbilical.
Lemme slap some stuff from my iterator headcanons doc here.
I like interpreting the puppet as a place to focus an iterator's consciousness. It acts as a sensory hub and a means to interact more finely with their surroundings. Neurons, in turn, are active memory comparable to RAM. Moon refers to Pebbles' imprints on his neurons as "a ghost left from his processing routines." They're not meant for long-term memory storage, but upper processes such as, well... thinking... cannot be done without them. So removing neurons affects an iterator’s ability to encode, recall, and process information. (Courtesy of my friend Folly, I also think they're mostly made out of fat. Kind of gross to eat.) Although Moon's umbilical is severed, she is still able to see through and control the movements of her puppet. So either she has some sort of other connection to the rest of her can, or her consciousness comes from the puppet rather than the can. The mechanical arm’s functions would be mostly structure-to-puppet function (control movements of arm and puppet, transmit the sensory information of the puppet) while the wire/cord handles more consciousness-in-puppet-to-structure function (facilitates awareness and control over superstructure and all that encompasses). So both the cord and the arm are part of the iterator-to-puppet connection, but the cord is more important. I feel like with the wire OR the arm's internals intact, the iterator can maintain perception of the puppet. When you give Moon an overseer eye, she says, “I am not much more than what you are looking at - a little creature in a box.” This can be literal, or it can imply that her perception is just limited to what she can see through her puppet in her damaged state.
In Rivulet’s campaign, the rarefaction cell could be partial compensation for a missing umbilical. Moon can move on her arm, call up image projections, reconnect to her overseers, and broadcast locally to Pebbles after getting the rarefaction cell. She refers to it as finally having her freedom back. But we don't know how many of her systems she does or does not have access to anymore.
If you eat one of Pebbles' neurons in front of him as Rivulet he says "I would appreciate if you would not eat those. My umbilical will keep me conscious, but every neuron lost is a piece of me lost as well..." We know that Pebbles keeps his wires/cord/arm connected in Saint's campaign, though, and he remains conscious despite having no visible neurons. Does the umbilical compensate for the lack of neurons as well? Maybe there are some still alive in the structure that we can’t see, and the umbilical allows him to stay connected to them.
...honestly, I think downpour makes questions about umbilicals harder to answer than if you only base off of vanilla lore. But I like working with downpour stuff, so oh well.
One last thing - the wiki page for Moon also says this under her trivia: "Looks to the Moon is still connected to the wall by her umbilical, but the damaged hardware lacks power to let her move around." Other references to umbilicals written throughout the wiki imply the arm is the umbilical as well. But! I don't know where the writers of that got that information. I don't think there's anything in the game that confirms that the umbilical and the arm are the same. If there's anything in the game that supports that, let me know~
So to summarize: I think evidence suggests the wires + cord are the umbilical because Moon refers to hers being cut. The mechanical arm could also be a part of the umbilical, or it be considered a different part that provides function in a different way. I usually refer to them separately, but that's just me, and I mostly do it for the sake of clarity. It's not confirmed canon.
There are a lot of things about Rain World lore you can run in circles around for hours, but not find any definitive conclusions for. It's part of the fun even if it drives me nuts sometimes. Come be confused with me :)
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le-trash-prince · 3 months
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Kenta
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Okay. It is once again time for me to talk about my number one little man. I was interested in Kenta from the very beginning, and at some point I realized that I was not going to be normal about him, but I really did not anticipate how much he would come to mean to me. I hope y'all have enjoyed witnessing my descent into feral blorbo state. It is not over for me in the slightest.
I want to say that Garfield really acted the shit out of this role, and the writers knew what they were doing when they cast him. His arc was so important to the overall plot, with his growth being pivotal to Tony's downfall, and yet he had a relatively small amount of dialogue to work with (although certainly not the smallest amount of the cast).
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A lot of his scenes involve him standing in Tony's office, taking instructions, or even just simply observing. A lot of his lines are based around business deals and errands—rather than furthering his emotional development. He doesn't give big speeches, he doesn't talk about his feelings or his dreams, it's always just "I'm doing xyz for Tony, and I will never betray him."
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Some of his most dialogue heavy scenes are in one stairwell with Pete and in another with Tony, which I think are extremely pivotal moments, both of which reveal a fear of abandonment.
But it's honestly when he's quiet that he says the most.
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And I love that, I'm obsessed with it. I love that the whole fandom could insantly tell that he and Pete had something going on, just from the way they looked at each other. I love that the storytelling in his arc was so highly visual.
In the beginning, Kenta appears to be nothing more than Tony's lackey: quiet, intimidating, and actively complicit with what is going on.
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But as we see him more and more, it becomes exceedingly apparent that he cares, so much. I know I am biased in saying this, but I do also pay close attention to what other people are saying about Kenta, and I know almost everyone has been waiting the entire series to see him stand up to Tony. The amount of acting that Garfield did with his eyes, while remaining such a stoic character, was insane.
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Despite him repeatedly declaring his loyalty to Tony, despite the fact that he does not reveal any actions against Tony until episode 12, we feel so much of his inner conflict.
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I think for me, personally, the aspect of Kenta's character that I relate to the most is his inability to speak up when he wants to. I've struggled with selective mutism my entire life, and there have been countless, countless scenarios where I've had so many things to say and no ability to say them. The more dire the situation, the more my words fail me. I have to spend so much of my energy constantly planning for potential conflict scenarios just so I can have the time I need to figure out which words to use. Because it can sometimes take months for me to figure out certain phrases. And because it is so painful to stay silent when you want to tell someone to stop. To stop fighting, to stop hurting each other, to stop hurting me.
So I was beyond moved and proud to watch Kenta finally be able to protect his brothers and quietly say the one thing he has wanted to say all along.
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Don't hurt anyone anymore.
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Don't hurt anyone anymore.
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Don't hurt anyone anymore.
I will take some of the words that P'Chod gave to Garfield before they went into production. "It’s just you want to live in a peaceful house and be happy together.” All we want is peace.
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I wish that Kenta had not been forced to kill Tony because I don't think he has ever wanted to hurt anyone. But I'm sure as hell not sorry that he did it. There will always be people who are unwilling to stop.
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And I recognize that Kenta tried a peaceful method first. He gave X-Hunter what they needed to put Tony in jail, and Tony refused to give up. He was never going to be the kind of person who would simply surrender. To him, these people's lives are property that he is entitled to.
Here is an auto translation of something Garfield said about Kenta at the final episode screening.
"I already knew that Kenta would be similar to me, in that I'm someone who doesn't dare to express my feelings to the people around me, saying very little. So when I got the role, I felt… that it teaches us that as long as we dare to be ourselves and do things that make us happy, that's enough."
We may never know what happened to Kenta after Tony died, but I hope he is able to find his peace. I hope he is able to engage with restorative justice, and I hope he is able to learn what family really should be.
And I hope that someone, anyone, will give him a goddamned hug.
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the first shot / the last shot
Thank you, Kenta, from the bottom of my heart, for showing us yours.
96 notes · View notes
kingofbodyrolls · 28 days
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My Heart's Home (m) | pjm | nine
🐴Chapter summary: You haven’t talked to Jimin in months— he has been successful in avoiding you since he saw Yoongi kiss you. But when a charity gala forces you together, will you erupt like an active volcano? 🐴Chapter title: Take the Rain Away 🐴Pairings: jimin x reader (main), jungkook x reader (only happens once in the first chapter), jungkook x OC (jessi), namjoon x OC (jessi), yoongi x hoseok, namjoon x oc, seokjin x oc, taehyung x oc 🐴Characters: female reader (isn’t mentioned by name and no “y/n”), Jimin, Jungkook, Namjoon, Yoongi, Hoseok, Seokjin, Taehyung and four female original characters. 🐴Genre/AU: ranch!au, slice of life!au, soulmate!au, cowboy!au + smut, humor, fluff, romance, slow burn and angst 🐴Rating: mature/explicit/R18 – this is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact!
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🐴Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸 🐴Chapter warnings: yelling and curse words 🤭 Jin’s pink slipper is finally here (though it’s not him wielding it lol) 🩴 🐴Status: completed (the epilogue is in the works!) 🐴Word count: 8.2k
🐴Taglist: @kookswifesblog, @kiki-zb, @babejinnie, @ownthesunshine, @allie-is-a-panda, @glllhjh, @bergandysam, @13-manggaetteok, @jeonsbabygirlsworld, @antisocial-mochi267,
🛑 psa to all you lovely people on the taglist, I’ve seen that some of you aren’t interacting… I’m wondering if you’re still reading or not— do you wish to be removed from the taglist? It’s okay if you don’t like it anymore, I can remove you if you want to 🛑
🐴Now playing 💿 “Take the Rain Away” by Rebecca Lavelle. [Wanna listen to the serie’s playlist?] 🐴Author’s note: can you tell I wrote this chapter while severely depressed (as I did the previous)? 🥲 But, it was very easy to channel all my feelings into it, so I wrote it in like a day while crying most of the time. But here it is! Also, again I’m sorry. I’m really going through it and dealing with my depression, so I’m sorry if I take longer to reply… I do look at your messages though! I don’t know, life is hard and I’m waiting to get a referral from my doctor… all that shit takes such a freaking long time! But yeah, I’m still struggling, but I’m doing my best to hang in there; bad days and a few good days finally. Thank you all so much for reading and for sticking with the story, tbh there were a few times in the latest chapters where I just wanted to delete it all and stop posting.. But yeah, thank fuck🫂 Also… I really hope you’ll love the next chapter and please don’t hesitate to let me know your thoughts in either a comment or a reblog ☀️💦 🐴Author’s note #2: I'm sorry… today I'm feeling extremely emotional and anxious. It’s making me cry and my head is so heavy with a lot of thoughts… I hope you still like the chapter, right now I’m afraid it’s crap, so I’ll go hide (don't mind me, this is 50% my anxiety speaking). See ya on Thursday lovelies!
It’s been cross posted to AO3 if you prefer to read there. Wanna see the book cover?
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“Take the rain away Take the rain away Give me hope Give me love Make it sweet from above Take the rain away Oh take the rain away Give me praise Give me heart Take the rain away”- ‘Take the Rain Away’ by Rebecca Lavelle
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The rain pelts on your windows, a rhythmic symphony against the glass that serves as the melodic backdrop to your dance with the paintbrush. Each stroke elicits a clench in your heart, a poignant harmony with the emotions that escape onto the canvas. Despite a tear finding its way down your cheek, you persist. The canvas becomes a vibrant tapestry, weaving through an array of red hues, from the delicate blush of pink to the profound richness of vermillion. In this intimate dance, you surrender to the guidance of the brush, allowing the strokes to tell a story only your heart understands.
The paintbrush becomes the voice of your unspoken thoughts, an ethereal extension of your mind that guides you through an escape. It whisks you away to an alternate reality, a place where joy and serenity prevail. Yet, as you gaze upon your canvas, the illusion shatters – a mosaic of red tones, a stark reflection of your inner turmoil. You’re aware of the truth it conceals, reluctant to acknowledge the lingering ache for a man who remains silent, a man whose choices have been clear and that choice wasn’t you. But why the heck would he decide to date someone that looks like you?
The baffling revelation still eludes you, a persistent enigma that has gnawed at your thoughts for days since the girls disclosed it. The meaning behind it remains a puzzle, and you find yourself grappling with the uncertainty. There’s an urge to confront Jimin, to seek answers, but the apprehension holds you back. 
Instead, you retreat to the solace of your bedroom, losing yourself in the strokes of your paintbrush. Each canvas becomes a testament to your emotional turmoil, saturated in shades of red that echo anger and sadness. The thought of whether anyone would buy these artworks fades into insignificance; the therapeutic process takes precedence, offering a semblance of peace in the midst of your inner storm.
For a solid week, the relentless rain has played its melancholic symphony, a constant companion to your shifting moods. While you don’t inherently despise the rain, its prolonged presence begins to cast a subtle veil of gloom. The weather, once a neutral backdrop, now becomes a weight on your shoulders, a persistent force tugging at the edges of your mind, leaving a trace of subtle melancholy in its wake.
Perhaps a twinge of bitterness creeps in, accompanied by an admission of jealousy as you observe Jungkook becoming a frequent overnight guest. Their shared moments are anything but discreet, the resonance of their love making echoing through the walls. You’ve mastered the art of drowning out those sounds, resorting to nocturnal strolls when needed. In the depths of your heart, you yearn for the same intimacy, but with Jimin. 
You sigh, feeling utterly deflated. Life never goes the way to want it to. Why can’t you just have something good happening for once?
In the dead of night, raindrops patter on your skin as you venture out once more for a solitary walk. The rhythmic percussion of raindrops becomes a welcome reprieve, drowning out the less-than-subtle sounds emanating from your sister’s room. Ugh. it’s just great— now you can’t stand people in love anymore! Despite your genuine happiness for your sister and Jungkook, witnessing their affectionate gestures becomes a bitter pill to swallow. The kisses, the embraces, the whispered words—all of it, a poignant reminder of what you yearn for with Jimin. 
If only you could have that.
You know that jealousy is a nasty feeling and it leaves you feeling bitter inside.
The rain penetrates your jacket, seeping through to your skin—a subtle reminder of your lack of preparation. Cursing under your breath, you navigate through the yard, each step burdened with the weight of your drenched attire. As you reach one of the paddocks, darkness envelops you, the atmosphere dense and humid, mirroring the warmth and heaviness echoing in your chest. Yet, you yearn for this feeling to dissipate, much like the wishful thought that the rain will cease, allowing the sun to once again cast its hopeful rays upon you.
Lifting your gaze to the sky, the night sky unfolds above you, a vast canvas adorned with innumerable stars shimmering in their cosmic dance. A sigh escapes your lips, a blend of appreciation and melancholy. The celestial display, though undeniably beautiful, carries a bittersweet weight tonight, stirring emotions that twirl like distant constellations in the vast expanse above.
With the rain as your shield, you ponder whether it’s safe to return inside again or not. Opting to let the rhythmic dance of raindrops cloak you further, you choose the soothing drumbeat of rain over the potential moans echoing through the walls. It’s better to give them more time to finish whatever they are doing, instead of going back and having to listen to it.
As the rain clings to your clothes and skin, an uncomfortable yet strangely welcomed sensation, you yearn for more than just the soothing touch of the downpour. Hoping against hope, you wish the rain could wash away the turmoil in your chest, or perhaps, deliver to you the one thing you crave and need the most—love. 
Jimin.
In the recesses of your heart, the truth echoes loudly— he is the one meant for you, and the regret gnaws at your soul for not confessing your feelings earlier. The fear of disrupting and jeopardizing his current relationship hangs heavy, a bitter pill you swallow. His decision is made, and you must bear the weight of it. 
Frustration clenches your hands as you yearn for a conversation, a connection—anything to breach the walls he’s created, leaving you to wonder why he’s avoiding you or won’t acknowledge you at all.
As your breath quickens, tears intertwine with the raindrops on your cheeks, a blurred fusion where your own sorrows become indistinguishable from the weeping sky.
Your clothes cling to you, saturated by the persistent rain, and you decide it’s time to retreat from the star-studded night. With a silent farewell to the celestial display, you make your way back into the house, yearning for the solace of a quiet room, and silently hoping your sister and Jungkook have concluded their love making.
As you open the door and traverse the hallway, the muffled exchange of hushed voices reaches your ears, causing your heart to sink. Determined, you press on and step into your bedroom, conveniently situated next to your sister’s. Lately, you’ve cursed this proximity, contemplating the idea of seeking refuge downstairs in the guestroom.
The rhythmic creaking of the bed and muted moans persist, making you release a weary sigh, hastily snatching your pillow to shield your ears from the intimate sounds infiltrating the air.
Morning arrives, and you’re weary, having fallen asleep with the pillow cocooned around your head. Your once-neat hair now resembles a bird’s nest, and your body, feeling rigid and sore, yearns for the elusive embrace of a restful night’s sleep.
Fatigue clinging to every step, you drag your weary body to the bathroom, performing the mundane rituals of brushing teeth and washing your face. The mirror mercilessly reflects the under-eye bags, taunting reminders of restless nights. A scoff escapes your lips as you splash water on your face, a futile attempt to shake off the lingering exhaustion and rouse yourself from the morning haze.
When you finally emerge from the bathroom, Jungkook steps out of your sister’s room, wearing a sheepish yet gentle smile. Weariness etched on your features, you respond with a weary nod, acknowledging his presence.
Apology etched in his expression, he inquires, “Did we disturb your sleep?” 
Concern lines his face, yet beneath the surface, a subtle smirk plays on his lips as his eyes sweep over your tired form.
“It’s fine,” you sigh, the weight of exhaustion evident in your voice, though deep down, you acknowledge that ’fine’ is a distant echo from the truth. 
“We’ll keep it down,” he assures, a warm smile gracing his features as he absentmindedly scratches his head. A soft chuckle escapes you, an acknowledgment of the genuine sweetness and kindness that radiate from him.
“Jungkook, really, you don’t have to worry. I’ll grab some earplugs or whatever,” you laugh, the sound devoid of true joy. Despite your attempts at humor, each forced smile or chuckle only serves as a reminder of the hollowness and sorrow settling in your chest.
Jungkook gives you a reluctant nod, a silent acknowledgment of your weariness and the deflated emotions you carry. With a heavy heart, you retreat into your room to get dressed, the weight of the morning and the unresolved thoughts lingering in the air.
As you descend and enter the kitchen, the comforting aroma of Ha-rin’s nearly finished breakfast fills the air. Offering a hand, you assist her in setting up the table in the cozy dining room. The rarity of having everyone gather for a meal is not lost on you; usually, you’re consumed by solitary, hurried bites as the demands of the ranch beckon. However, today unfolds differently, marked by an unusual slowness in the rhythm of ranch life.
“You look tired,” she observes with a gentle concern in her voice as the two of you collaborate in setting the table. A soft chuckle escapes you, a mixture of acknowledgment and self-deprecating humor. It’s as if they’ve pointed out the obvious—yes, you’re aware you don’t look your best, but must they bring attention to it?
“Thanks. Jungkook and Jessi kept me up again,” you respond with a weariness that seeps into both your voice and posture, a tiredness underscored by a stifled yawn.
As you turn your head, Jungkook and Jessi stand in the doorframe, wearing apologetic expressions that mirror the remorse evident in their eyes.
“We’re sorry,” your sister offers a sincere smile as she pulls out a chair, settling down. Jungkook follows suit, immediately diving into the meal with an eagerness that hints at his hunger.
“It’s fine,” you brush off their apologies with weary eyes and a nonchalant wave. “At least you’re getting some,” you jest, but an awkward hush descends upon the room. The atmosphere turns dense, and their uncertain expressions reveal they’re unsure how to react. “Don’t mind me; I’m just... frustrated. Not at you, though!” you quickly reassure them, taking a seat and joining in the meal.
For a few minutes, an uncomfortable silence descends, wrapping around the room like an unwelcome guest. It’s the kind of awkward stillness that feels stifling and peculiar, and you find yourself yearning for someone to break it, to utter anything to shatter the tension lingering in the air.
“We actually have something to tell you,” your sister begins, and as you meet her eyes, you notice a sparkle of excitement, maybe even love, dancing in them. Her happiness is contagious; a radiant smile graces her lips, and a delicate pink hue adorns her cheeks, complementing her beautifully. It’s a sight that warms your heart, pulling a genuine smile from you in return.
Jungkook gently moves his hand over Jessi’s, giving it a tender squeeze, and his eyes gleam with a radiant light, an unmistakable shimmer of affection, you presume. Their laughter dances in the air, and their shared smiles are like a silent declaration of the love that binds them.
“We’ve been meaning to share something with you,” your sister begins, her voice laced with a mix of excitement and apprehension. “Jungkook and I are dating,” she announces, and you can’t help but feel your smile broaden. You observe the subtle exchange of glances between them, a blend of happiness and nervousness, as if unsure of how you’ll react to this newfound chapter in their relationship.
Your eyes glisten with unshed tears, and you can’t help but beam, your emotions laid bare. “That makes me so happy to hear!” A single tear escapes, and you playfully scold yourself, but deep down, you’re overwhelmed with joy for your sister and Jungkook.
Your sister’s concern deepens as she leans in, her eyes reflecting worry. “Are you okay with this? You seem a bit sad…”
With tear-streaked cheeks, you point to your clearly emotional face, chuckling through the joyful tears. “This? I’m just thrilled for you. I just... wish I had that too. But I’m genuinely happy for you.” Sniffling, you manage a smile, though your plate is nearly obscured by your overwhelming emotions.
Jungkook, your sister, and Ha-rin exchange concerned glances, but wisely refrain from prying further. You believe they’ve caught on; your weeks of moping and the emotional rollercoaster have left little room for secrets. It’s ridiculous, you scold yourself internally, navigating the intricate maze of your own emotions. The irony of grieving a relationship that never truly existed weighs heavy on your chest, and you can’t help but feel a pang of sorrow for what could have been.
Genuine happiness radiates within you for their newfound relationship, and you don’t perceive it as strange. Sure, there was a fleeting encounter with Jungkook, as Jessi pointed out, but it was just that—a passing moment. You never harbored romantic feelings for him; your joy stems from seeing them genuinely happy together. Yet, an undeniable pang echoes in your heart, a yearning for that elusive connection you witness in them, to have that special someone— and that someone is Jimin.
Caught in the whirlwind of conflicting emotions, you grapple with the uncertainty of your feelings for Jimin. Every attempt to navigate this emotional maze has hit a dead end – avoiding him, attempting conversations that fall on deaf ears, and even embracing silence only to be met with his intense gaze. 
The enigma that is Jimin remains beyond your comprehension. Your desire for him lingers, leaving you in a perplexing predicament with no clear path forward.
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“Relax your shoulders,” Yoongi’s voice cuts through the rhythmic sounds of hooves against the earth, offering guidance as a fiery-red mare gracefully circles you in the pen. Perched atop the fence, Yoongi, accompanied by Hoseok, shares his insights. Lately, with the challenging task of taming wild horses, Hoseok has become an invaluable ally, contributing his skill and energy to the shared pursuit.
His involvement extends beyond mere assistance; he actively contributes to the preparations, occasionally joining your rides and, on other occasions, simply sharing moments as you engage in the day’s tasks. Today, he observes with keen interest, his presence an unspoken support in the rhythm of your work.
You attempt to find your focus, and you let your shoulders sag, reminding yourself of the importance of a calm and clear mind in handling the unpredictable nature of the horses. Despite your efforts, stress and frustration linger, making the task more challenging. Today seems particularly difficult. Your gaze repeatedly drifts toward Yoongi and Hoseok, seated closely. The air between them carries a subtle tension, Yoongi fidgeting with his shirt, an uncharacteristic unease marking his demeanor. It’s funny how being around someone you like can change the way you behave.
You let out a soft chuckle, finding Yoongi’s crush on Hoseok endearing. The uncertainty of whether Hoseok reciprocates, or even what his preferences are— if he’s into men, women or both. You have no clue, but you genuinely hope that Hoseok shares Yoongi’s feelings; knowing that Yoongi could use a guy like Hoseok in his life.
The red mare’s whinny echoes through the air as it breaks into a wild gallop, gracefully navigating the pen with powerful bucks. This one, a recent addition, demands more patience than its counterparts. However, you embrace the challenge, recognizing that each horse is unique, and you’re willing to invest the time needed to build trust and understanding.
You let the spirited mare run around the pen, attempting to divert your attention from its antics. Instead, your gaze returns to the two men on the fence. They’re engaged in casual conversation, possibly about work, but the genuine smile on Yoongi’s face has an inexplicable effect on your heart. Hoseok’s eyes light up at every word from Yoongi, and it feels as if your heart could burst into a garden of blossoming flowers. In that moment, you yearn for a connection as beautiful and captivating as the one unfolding before you.
As your gaze drifts, it travels up to the yard, settling on the house that holds the thoughts of the man who occupies your every waking moment—Jimin. The silence between you two persists, leaving you in a state of anticipation. Every now and then, you catch glimpses of him with Deiji, their laughter echoing through the air. Despite the small flower in your chest withering at the sight, you remind yourself it’s okay, even though anger still lingers.
“Watch out!” Hoseok shouts, leaping down from the fence with Yoongi in tow. Before you can react, you find yourself sprawled on the ground with a thud. A frustrated groan escapes your lips as you rub your back, rolling over to your side.
You spot Yoongi approaching the red mare, hands raised in the air, skillfully redirecting its attention away from you. Meanwhile, Hoseok is already down on his knees beside you. As your eyes flutter open, a wave of confusion washes over you.
Concern fills Hoseok’s voice as he asks, “Are you okay?” 
Your gaze meets his, lingering confusion evident. Meanwhile, Yoongi persists in his attempt to soothe the red mare, now employing a gentler approach, his words whispered in a hushed tone.
Your eyes lock with Hoseok’s as you ask, “What happened?” 
His outstretched hand becomes your anchor, pulling you up into a sitting position, your fingers instinctively rubbing your sore back again.
His words hit you, “The horse ran you over,” accompanied by a subtle chuckle. Yet, his eyes reveal a deeper concern as he carefully scans you, ensuring that you’re genuinely okay.
You glance around in confusion at the sandy expanse of the pen. 
“It did?” you inquire, perplexed, your gaze shifting down to the ground where you find yourself. You must have blacked out or something. You assess your body, feeling a general lack of pain, at least not as much as you expected.
“I think I’m fine,” you assure Hoseok, allowing him to help you up as you stand. You dust off the sand from your pants and shirt, trying to regain a sense of composure.
Yoongi, having calmed the mare, walks over to you. “Are you sure you’re fine?” he asks, raising a brow as he looks you up and down. You chuckle, dismissing any concern with a wave of your hand. There’s no need for a fuss over a simple fall.
“I’m fine. I was just pushed. No biggie!” you declare, gesturing with your hands to reassure them that everything is under control.
“Maybe we should take a look at you at the house?” Hoseok suggests, and you instantly flinch, a wave of apprehension washing over you.
“Oh god no. I’m fine, and I really don’t want to go in there,” you state firmly, a pressed smile on your face. The last thing you need is to see Jimin with Deiji again; better to stay clear of them, as you’ve been doing recently. Both Yoongi and Hoseok laugh, and you notice the way they look at each other, as if there’s something you’ve missed. For a split second, you feel left out before joining in the laughter yourself.
You ask Yoongi to finish working on the red mare while you and Hoseok take a seat on top of the fence. From there, you observe him letting the horse run about, much like you did earlier. Yoongi always appears so relaxed when he’s working. His ability to keep his mind sealed off and clear during tasks is incredible. Unfortunately, the same can’t be said for you or Hoseok. The dynamic between the three of you is unique, each with your own way of approaching the work at hand.
The happy-go-lucky man next to you appears captivated by watching Yoongi work; his eyes shine as bright as the sun. The way he holds his breath, as if the air is too thick with something, sparks a glimmer of hope within you. Perhaps it’s because he might harbor feelings for Yoongi.
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You meticulously apply eyeliner and mascara, ensuring you look flawless. Returning to your room, your eyes fall upon the elegant purple satin gown laid out on your bed. The floor-length attire boasts a sweetheart neckline, perfectly complemented by a pair of carefully chosen low heels that you gracefully slip into.
Before stepping out, you steal a moment to gaze at your reflection in the mirror, and what stares back at you is nothing short of captivating.
As you step outside your door, you encounter your sister, adorned in a floor-length gown of deep blue that borders on the verge of velvety blackness.
“Wow, you look stunning,” you compliment your sister, and she responds with a soft smile, her fingers nervously dancing with the edges of her purse.
“Thanks, you look incredible too,” she smiles warmly, and together you descend the stairs to join the other girls.
Ara, Soo-ah, and Ha-rin await you downstairs, adorned in stunning gowns for the night’s gala in town. The charity event, featuring an auction, aims to raise funds for the local hospital’s children’s ward. Ara stuns in a radiant red dress, Soo-ah elegantly dons baby blue, prompting you to ponder if it’s her favorite color, and Ha-rin exudes sophistication in a black gown. The quartet, a vision of beauty, gathers in the kitchen, the air buzzing with excitement for the glamorous night ahead.
“Ready for an enchanting evening, everyone?” you inquire, casting a smile across the group, your eyes dancing with anticipation.
“Yeah!” Soo-ah cheers with infectious joy, and without a second thought, you all rush to the door, hitch up your dresses, and dash into the yard, the relentless rain already kissing your gowns with its playful touch.
You hastily hop into the car, and Jessi swiftly ignites the engine, reversing out of the yard. The rain’s symphony dances on the windshield, while the sun gracefully sets, painting the sky in captivating shades of gold and pink.
Jessi navigates the road with precision, and the group settles into a comfortable ease. Casual conversations and light-hearted jokes fill the air, yet your mind strays elsewhere, tethered to thoughts of Jimin. Anticipating his presence at the gala, you resolve to keep a careful distance, aware that the crowd might offer a shield for the avoidance you seek.
Navigating the rain-drenched roads adds extra time to your journey into town, but finally, you pull up in front of City Hall. The building itself seems to have donned its best attire for the occasion, adorned with banners and a vibrant red carpet that unfurls invitingly through the grand entrance.
As Jessi skillfully parks the car, you hastily step out, seeking refuge under the overhang of the building to escape the relentless rain. A quick scan of the parking lot reveals the presence of Jimin and Jungkook’s trucks, instantly causing a pang in your chest. The prospect of encountering Jimin tonight tightens your heart, and you brace yourself for the emotional storm that might follow.
“Ugh I fucking hate the rain,” Soo-ah groans beside you, her disdain for the downpour resonating with your own sentiments. Your chuckle, a small escape from the damp reality, lingers in the misty air.
Ensuring everyone is prepared, you lead the way into the grand hall. The opulence hits you instantly – a symphony of golds and reds creating a lavish spectacle. The vast space is adorned with small, round tables draped in rich red cloth, each topped with flickering candles. Towards the front, a podium commands attention, surrounded by carefully curated art pieces. Among them, proudly displayed, are a couple of your own paintings, awaiting their moment in tonight’s charitable auction.
Approaching the guys, you’re met with a sight to behold—Jungkook impeccably clad in a black tux adorned with subtle stripes, while Yoongi and Hoseok exude charm in their tuxedos, each strand of hair meticulously styled. Embracing them warmly, your attention shifts to Jimin, not far off, accompanied by his stunning girlfriend. The duo radiates elegance, and you can’t help but curse Jimin silently for his undeniable allure— his ass looks so good in those pants. His tux drapes his frame flawlessly, accentuating every curve, and you catch yourself practically drooling before quickly averting your eyes.
Spotting his gaze directed your way, you respond with a silent nod. Despite your desire to keep your distance, you choose the path of politeness, offering this small acknowledgment in the crowded elegance of the gala.
The room swells with a mix of familiar faces and strangers. Across the expanse, you catch sight of Namjoon and Seokjin at a neighboring table. With a warm smile, you extend a friendly wave in their direction.
As the auction commences, you navigate through the crowd toward a table, silently grateful for opting for low heels to spare your feet. A glass of champagne in hand, you join Yoongi, Hoseok, Soo-ah, and Ara at a table. Meanwhile, Ha-rin has engaged in a lively conversation with Namjoon and Seokjin across the room, their friendship evident even from a distance.
Jessi and Jungkook are stationed at a table alongside Jimin and Deiji, and a scoff escapes you when your gaze lands on Jimin. The silence between you two remains, a lack of surprise settling in as a familiar companion at this point.
He appears incredibly alluring, like a full-course meal, and something stirs within your veins—a concoction of anger and jealousy, perhaps. The desire to speak to him, to feel his touch, clashes with the urge to tear him apart. Later, the thought of dancing with him lingers, but the awkwardness stemming from his radio silence and the undeniable truth that he isn’t yours keeps you at a wary distance.
The auctioneer’s voice becomes a distant murmur, his words lost in the whirl of paintings and various items on the stand. Your attention, however, is not tethered to the auction; instead, it’s ensnared by the intensity in Jimin’s gaze. The way his eyes lock onto yours mirrors a familiarity, reminiscent of the look he gave you weeks ago during Jessi’s cast celebration dinner. The unspoken depth in his eyes unsettles you, inducing a subtle sweat, nervous energy, and an involuntary gulp.
With no refuge in sight, you attempt to anchor yourself in the rhythm of your heartbeat, a desperate bid to quell the storm of emotions swirling within you.
Indeed— sin personified gazes your way, but what does it matter? His silence, his refusal to engage, grates on your last nerves. You know you’re at an auction right now, and it would be weird to talk at this event, but dammit, he could just come over and ask you for a talk, pull you off to another room. Anything, really. 
A sly smile graces your lips as Yoongi playfully nudges your shoulder, and you, in turn, lean into the comfort of his presence. A subtle shift in Jimin’s gaze doesn’t go unnoticed, the intensity of his eyes deepening as the unspoken tension weaves through the air.
Hoseok playfully nudges you as your vibrant red painting graces the auction stage. Surprisingly, an elegant elderly lady becomes enamored with it, bidding generously and claiming it as her own. Gratitude swells within you, knowing that the proceeds will contribute to a worthy cause.
Jimin’s unwavering gaze continues to linger on you, an irritation bubbling within. You question why he can’t redirect his attention to his girlfriend or, at the very least, the ongoing auction.
The auction unfolds in the background, but your focus remains unyielding to the bidding, stolen by the persistent gaze of the blonde man. His intense gaze feels like he’s stripping you down with his eyes. Yet you remain nonchalant, indifferent to his silent advances.
During a brief respite, as delectable appetizers circulate the room, you discreetly savor the miniature delights, determinedly diverting your attention from Jimin as per your original strategy.
Abruptly, you interject into the group’s conversation, “Is there something on my face?” Their perplexed gazes pivot towards you, uncertain of the sudden inquiry.
As you munch on a bite of food, you nonchalantly toss in, “Jimin keeps giving me these intense stares, and I just don’t get it.”
Yoongi and Hoseok share a knowing chuckle, their eyes reflecting a camaraderie that Soo-ah and Ara immediately catch onto, shooting you looks of playful understanding.
“No, there’s nothing on your face,” Soo-ah says with a teasing smile, her words dripping with a playful undertone.
“Maybe you should talk to him?” Ara suggests, her voice carrying a gentle note of encouragement, like a flicker of a candle in the dim room of uncertainty.
“He doesn’t want to talk, and I hardly think this is the place for it…” you say, the words hanging in the air like a fleeting sigh, drowned out by the buzz of conversations around you as you take a thoughtful sip of your champagne.
You redirect your attention to the auctioneer, a black vase taking center stage this time. As the bidding unfolds, you indulge in another sip of champagne, feeling the effervescent bubbles dance teasingly across your tongue, a subtle distraction from the tension in the room.
As the final gavel falls, signaling the end of the auction, a wave of relief washes over you. The speakers come alive with soulful melodies, casting a warm ambiance over the room. To your surprise, the atmosphere becomes infectious, and you observe couples from other tables swaying to the rhythmic tunes. A chuckle escapes you, realizing you’ve never been one to dance at such formal events. Nevertheless, the music’s allure beckons, and you find yourself succumbing to the rhythm, ready to embrace the unexpected joy of the night.
Yoongi seizes your hands, whisking you onto the dance floor in a whirl of laughter and joy. The dance is a delightful blend of fun and friendship, his every move resonating with an infectious rhythm. As you twirl under the dazzling lights, you catch Hoseok’s gaze fixed on Yoongi. Leaning in, you share a whispered observation, “Hoseok’s eyes are practically glued to you, you know?”
His laughter reverberates through the air, a melody that resonates with a warmth you find comforting. “I know,” he chuckles, the sound a harmonious note in the symphony of the evening.
As he smirks, a playful glint in his eyes, you can’t help but reciprocate with a grateful smile. He twirls you around, a dance of understanding, letting you sway out of his embrace only to draw you back in. Oh, the dance you share with him is a temporary refuge, a wishful escape from the reality you yearn to change. However, your joy falters as you catch Jimin’s gaze; his eyes, far from angelic, hold a mysterious intensity that pierces through the rhythm of the music.
With a chuckle, Yoongi leans in, “Jimin’s got his eyes on you too.”
“I’ve felt his eyes on me since we walked through that door,” you admit with a sigh, your gaze wandering over the dance floor where your sister twirls with Jungkook, and Ha-rin gracefully dances with Seokjin.
“You should consider talking to him,” he suggests again, but you dismiss the idea with a subtle shake of your head.
“I doubt it would make any difference, honestly,” you laugh, pressing your body into Yoongi’s. His warmth envelops you, and for a brief moment, in his embrace, everything feels like it might just be okay.
Taking a step back from Yoongi, you express the need for a break. As you make your way back to the table to sip on more champagne, you observe Yoongi inviting Hoseok to dance, a proposal met with a willing agreement. Soo-ah joins you at the table, casting a gentle gaze in your direction.
“You danced with Hoseok?” You inquire, your gaze softened with curiosity.
“I did,” she admits with a smile. “He’s a really nice guy.” You nod, acknowledging her words. However, you can’t shake the understanding that someone in your circle might end up with a bruised heart, considering both Yoongi and Soo-ah have affections for Hoseok.
As you watch Hoseok and Yoongi gracefully moving on the dance floor, impressed by Hoseok’s skilled control over his body, a genuine smile plays on your lips. However, that fleeting moment of joy is interrupted as you sense the weight of brown eyes piercing into your back. Turning around, you find Jimin dancing intimately with Deiji, the intensity of his gaze making your smile fade.
You observe Jimin and Deiji dancing cheek to cheek, their bodies pressed tightly together, making you scoff and redirect your attention to Soo-ah. Just as you try to shake off the unsettling sight, a tap on your shoulder interrupts your thoughts. You turn around to find Hoseok, his bright smile inviting, “Do you want to dance?”
You seize his hand, allowing him to whisk you onto the dance floor, reminiscent of how Yoongi did earlier. Hoseok effortlessly twirls you around, evoking laughter that bubbles up from deep within. Knowing you’re not the most adept dancer, you surrender to his guidance, and he proves to be exceptionally skilled at leading you through the dance.
Amid the enjoyment, a surge of audacity overcomes you, prompting an uncharacteristic move. “What do you think about Yoongi?” The words spill out unexpectedly, catching Hoseok off guard, a reaction vividly displayed on his face. A chuckle escapes you as you revel in the spontaneity of the moment.
“What do you mean?” he asks, catching off guard. 
Unable to contain your mischievous grin, you lean in and tease, “You know he likes you, right?” As the words escape your lips, you’re conscious of the trust you might be breaking but convinced that mingling is the key to any potential connection. Hoseok, though initially shocked, isn’t repulsed as you feared. Instead, his eyes widen, and a subtle pink tint adorns his cheeks, leaving you wondering how he’ll respond.
“He does?” Hoseok stammers, caught off guard and missing a beat. Your chuckle only intensifies as you nod in confirmation. The revelation lingers in the air, and you sense that you might not have to do much more to set things in motion.
As you continue to dance, a comfortable silence envelops you both before Hoseok breaks it, his words hanging in the air, “You know Jimin likes you too.”
You roll your eyes, well aware of the situation. “Yeah, not much to do about it when he has a girlfriend,” you admit with a wry smile. Despite Hoseok’s good intentions, you’ve firmly decided not to act on your feelings while Jimin is still in a relationship. It’s a line you won’t cross.
You dance a little longer until Yoongi is at your side again, grabbing your arm and pulling you into his embrace. He wears a curious smile as he asks, “What were you talking about with Hoseok?”
You chuckle softly, “I told him.”
He glances at you, a puzzled expression on his face, “Told him what?”
“That you’ve got a crush on him,” you declare, matter-of-factly, in a hushed tone meant just for the two of you. However, with the rain tapping on the roof and the music playing, it’s a challenge to catch every word.
Yoongi’s expression doesn’t exactly radiate joy, but there’s a subtle softness to his features, an almost-relaxed demeanor. He releases a frustrated sigh, raking a hand through his hair in apparent exasperation.
“I’m sorry. I know it isn’t my place to say anything. But he actually seemed intrigued!” You share, your words riding the rhythm of the music as you sway with Yoongi. His tension eases, and he responds with a soft expression, a subtle acknowledgment of the revelation.
“It’s okay,” he breathes out, “it wasn’t your place, but it’s fine.” 
You lean into him, embracing him gently and offering a reassuring pat on the back. In that moment, you catch Jimin’s gaze fixed on you once again. The repetitive stares leave you puzzled. Why is he focused on you instead of his girlfriend?
You feel your heart quicken, your nostrils flare, and your hands clench around Yoongi’s back. He pulls you away, confusion etched on his face, questioning what’s wrong. But you see red. It’s reached a boiling point. The anger simmers inside you, consuming every inch of your being, and with determination, you let go of Yoongi and stride purposefully over to Jimin and Deiji.
Standing before them, you take a deep inhale, a turbulent storm of emotions brewing beneath your skin. “Why the hell are you staring at me like that?” Your voice slices through the ambient sounds, a piercing question that fractures the comfortable cocoon around Jimin and Deiji. Jimin slowly turns to face you, his expression shifting from surprise to a somber acknowledgment, as if he’s been caught in the act of something he’d rather keep hidden.
“Shouldn’t your eyes be on your girlfriend, huh? Why the fuck do you keep gazing at me? Look at your damn girlfriend!” you hiss, your hands tightly clenched at your sides, radiating with anger.
“And while you’re at it, why the fuck can’t you talk to me like a normal human being?” you raise your voice, the anger boiling so fiercely within you that you feel breathless as you unleash your words.
“You’re a damn coward, aren’t you? You shouldn’t be casting your eyes my way when you have a girlfriend right there!” You jab your finger accusingly at her, and she flinches, uncertain about how to react. Jimin simply gazes at you, as though you’ve lost your marbles—and maybe you have, because the words keep pouring out.
“You fucking jerk. If you had the decency to communicate, to use your damn voice instead of making baseless assumptions, we wouldn’t be in this ridiculous situation!” You huff, the waves of anger radiating from your body. The sudden realization hits you that the entire room is now fixated on the spectacle, and an eerie silence envelops the space, punctuated only by the intensity of your heated words.
Yoongi steps up beside you, a silent force attempting to ground you, but you refuse to yield. The torrent of anger surges within you, and with an accusatory finger, you unleash your fury on Jimin.
“I fucking hate you! You’re stupid. I hate you. I fucking hate you. I love you. I fucking hate you. I hate you so fucking much!” Your words, laden with venom, spill from your lips in a torrent of conflicting emotions. You seethe, feeling strangely lighter, though the room spins around you. Yoongi releases your arm, his face a mix of shock, and confusion mirrors the peculiar glances from those around you, leaving you wondering why everyone is now looking at you even more strangely than before.
“You fucking bastard. Stop looking at me like that,” you hiss at Jimin, catching him off guard. Deiji wears a displeased expression, and Jimin’s features soften in a way that leaves you utterly bewildered. 
Deiji appears visibly irritated, and you’re left wondering if her frustration is directed at you or if she shares your exasperation for Jimin. As the tension simmers, Jimin unexpectedly breaks into laughter, his audacity fueling the fire of your anger. The laughter grates on your nerves, aggravating you further. Why on earth is he finding amusement in this situation? There’s nothing remotely funny about it, intensifying the blaze of your already fiery emotions.
You jab your accusatory finger at him once more, your voice cutting through the tension, “Stop laughing. This isn’t funny!”
Your voice may carry the tone of an angered child denied its desires, but you couldn’t care less. In this moment, you’re finally confronting Jimin, even if the conversation seems to be one-sided.
You observe as he parts his lips, ready to utter words that you don’t wish to hear.
“I don’t want to hear it! You know what? I’m done!” You hiss in frustration, ready to pivot away from the awkward situation, aware of the collective gaze of all the guests upon you. As you start to turn, Jimin’s firm grip on your wrist stops you, compelling you to face him again.
“You can stick your dick where the sun doesn’t shine!” You shriek, wrenching your arm free, and storming out of the building. The erratic thumping of your heart resonates like a dissonant ringing in your ears, mirroring the chaos within.
Gasping frantically for air, your breath catching in turbulent spasms, you step outside, feeling as if your body is unraveling at the seams. Collapsing on the stairs, you surrender to the tremors of anger pulsating through you. Attempting to regain composure, you strive to slow your breath, but the task proves as challenging as holding back a tempest.
Regret floods your senses, a torrent of remorse for every word unleashed in the heat of anger, half of them lost to the haze of fury. The weight of all eyes fixed upon you, their gaze searing into your soul, amplifies the desire for the ground to open up and engulf you whole. 
What transpired in that room, and how did it all spiral into such chaos?
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A symphony of hooves shatters the tranquility of your peaceful slumber, jerking you awake. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you hurry to the window to witness the commotion outside. In the distance, a captivating spectacle unfolds — a wild herd of horses, led by the majestic brown stallion, thundering across the landscape. These creatures have become frequent visitors, drawing nearer to the ranch with each passing day. Curiosity grips you; what secrets do these untamed spirits carry, and why do they venture closer to your haven?
With a contented sigh, you wearily make your way back to your bed, sinking into its welcoming embrace. A spontaneous yawn escapes, accompanied by a luxurious stretch that sends waves of relaxation through your well-rested body. The simple joy of a peaceful night’s sleep settles over you, like a comforting blanket enveloping your weary soul.
Entering the bathroom, you brace yourself for the day ahead. Under the rejuvenating spray of a quick shower, you allow the cascading water to serve as a cleansing force, washing away not only yesterday’s mistakes but also the lingering regret that clings to your every thought. The steam clouds your reflection, a metaphorical veil between the past and the potential for a better today.
The bracing cold water jolts you into wakefulness, a refreshing prelude to the day ahead. As rivulets of water cascade down, you ensure every trace of sleep is banished, emerging invigorated and ready for the rigors of another day on the ranch. Donning a weathered shirt, worn-in pants, and your trusty boots, you complete the ensemble with the signature hat that shields your face from the sun’s relentless gaze. Descending the stairs, you find Ara in the kitchen, skillfully crafting a sandwich for her morning appetite.
“Hey there!” you chirp, a grin lighting up your face, buoyed by the rare joy of a restful night’s sleep. A subtle acknowledgment forms in your mind—thankful for your sister and Jungkook opting for a night at his place, granting you the serenity that fueled the upbeat mood.
“Hey, how are you feeling?” Ara inquires, her attention focused on putting away the butter, as if carefully choosing the moment to meet your eyes.
“Actually, leave it out. I could use one too,” you interject, and Ara obligingly retrieves the butter, finally meeting your gaze. “As for how I’m doing—just fine.”
She hands you the butter and a knife, a wry smile playing on her lips, “Some party, huh?”
She chuckles, and you roll your eyes. The weight of her laughter only intensifies your embarrassment, a vivid reminder of the scene you created at the gala. You find yourself wishing for the ground to open up and spare you from the aftermath of your emotional outburst. Why did you have to make such a spectacle?
Damn you and your relentless emotions. Now the whole world, or at least everyone at the gala, knows the depth of your disdain for Jimin, you assume. You bury your face in your hands, releasing a frustrated grunt. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to create such a spectacle.”
Ara’s laughter rings out, much to your dismay, intensifying the furrow in your brow. You don’t see the humor; you’ve practically made a fool of yourself in front of everyone.
“Well, we all had a blast,” she laughs, a beautiful smile playing on her lips, “I’m sure Jimin is having a good laugh about it too.”
You roll your eyes once more, highly skeptical. After all, you called him so many terrible names, didn’t allow him a word in, and basically told him to stick it in his ass.
Wonderful. Great. Peachy. Words that utterly fail to capture the chaotic storm of emotions swirling within you at this very moment. The vivid memories of your passionate outburst yesterday haunt you, casting a shadow over any semblance of composure. There’s a lingering wish to escape the possibility of encountering Jimin and his girlfriend again, but deep down, you acknowledge that luck doesn’t favor you so generously.
You hastily slather butter onto your bread, devouring it in its pure simplicity. The imminent need to depart gnaws at you; the day awaits, beckoning you to gallop over to the Bell ranch, where the untamed spirits of the wild horses entwine with the shared endeavors of you and Yoongi.
“I have to go,” you declare, snatching the bread in your mouth, and dash outdoors toward the barn. The sun, now radiantly shining, bestows a sense of hope upon your day, propelling you forward with anticipation.
As you saddle up Marshmallow and guide him outdoors, a faint sound begins to patter on the roof—a soft, rhythmic reminder of the rain.
Out in the open, the rain embraces you in seconds, a relentless downpour that draws a scoff. Undeterred, you plant your foot in the stirrup and swing the other leg over, urging Marshmallow into a full gallop. The rain pelts your face, but you ride on, indifferent to the weather’s challenge.
As you ride, thoughts of Jimin’s expression at the gala linger in your mind. Despite his initial composure, his face betrayed offense and anger, as if restraining the urge to shout back. He stood there, his girlfriend by his side, absorbing every word you hurled at him. Regret tugs at you, but the words are irreversible, a turbulent exchange you can’t undo, even if you wished otherwise.
A yearning lingers within you, hoping that Jimin would have retorted, engaged in a verbal sparring, or at least defended himself. However, his silence echoes louder than any words, leaving you to ponder the significance of his unspoken response.
You sense that words were poised on the tip of Jimin’s tongue, ready to spill out, but a conscious decision to shield yourself from his potential revelations compelled you to shut down any communication before it began.
The peculiar weather paints a contradictory scene: raindrops cascade, yet the sun defiantly radiates its warmth, creating a surreal ambiance. In the midst of this meteorological paradox, a double rainbow graces the distant horizon. The sight, both enchanting and whimsical, elicits a genuine smile, urging you to spur Marshmallow into an even faster gallop. Each rhythmic beat of his hooves seems to synchronize with the cadence of your heart, a determined attempt to outride the persistent thoughts of Jimin that linger in your mind.
As the ranch emerges on the horizon, a welcoming sight after the turbulent events, you guide Marshmallow down to the pen where Yoongi and Hoseok eagerly await your arrival. Skillfully securing Marshmallow to the fence, you exchange greetings with the two men, the atmosphere pregnant with anticipation for the day’s tasks on the ranch.
Hoseok’s laughter greets you even before you utter a single word, prompting an eye roll from you in response.
As Yoongi dedicates himself to the fiery-red mare once more, you find your way to the fence, settling in next to Hoseok with a sense of camaraderie.
“Nice gala, huh?” Hoseok teases, raising his eyebrows in a way that suggests he’s well aware of the evening’s drama. You respond with a loud groan, wondering why people find the need to rub your failures in your face.
“Shit. I regret how I behaved. It’s so embarrassing,” you confess, closing your eyes as if wishing to erase yesterday from existence.
“I understand. But it was fun to watch,” he laughs heartily, his entire being pulsating with mirth.
You shift your gaze downward to Yoongi in the pen, “Have you noticed the herd of wild horses getting closer?”
Yoongi nods knowingly, “Yeah.”
You observe the mare’s lively movements before turning your attention back to Yoongi, “What do you think it means?”
Yoongi looks up from the mare, his expression serious, “Nothing good.”
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Author’s note(2): Thank you so much for reading! 🌸 I would very much appreciate it if you reblogged the chapter, if you liked it ✨ A small review or a comment would also mean a lot to me, and even a like. But please, don’t be afraid to let me know what you think; your kind words makes me extremely happy 💜
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01zfan · 1 month
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alright i don’t know why you guys have made me the face of ot6 briize but i’m going to give you guys my thoughts on the situation that you clearly want very badly. i have been into kpop for a very long time. i will say two main things about this boycott.
the first is that i have genuinely never seen such a strange group of toxic solo stans/akgaes that hate on the groups fans and lowkey shade members under the guise of “loving all the members/trying to protect them”.
this boycott campaign is genuinely just solo stans mad that their bias isn't being treated the way they want. if this was truly about the wellbeing of riize, we would be demanding for sm to give them better security at airports so they don't get mobbed. we would've been urging sm to take legal action against malicious comments earlier. we would be demanding better preparations for their comebacks like getting an actual mini instead of a bunch of singles. but none of that is happening.
instead, there's this weird "i don't like the rest of riize because there's no seunghan" vibe about the boycott. like why are individual member activities suffering because of this? why are we swearing at the members online, saying things like sungchan doesn't care about riize, the rest of riize are fake except for eunseok, etc. why are we bullying and bothering briize not participating in the boycott? for not talking about seunghan when there's literally nothing to talk about? these are things solo stans/akgaes do, not people who claim to love their group.
my second thing is that if you want to boycott riize be my guest. HOWEVER i think it is important to face the facts here. SM will not suffer from this boycott nearly as bad as riize will. they are a rookie group in a new generation, and they have an exceptional momentum going. but the industry is cutthroat and it moves fast. if this boycott is “successful,” then it will truthfully only sabotage riize and not SM. even if riize's members don’t end up losing profit, i believe a successful boycott could do insane damage to their confidence/psyche. it could also possibly effect future comebacks and their faith in fans. i’ve seen how fear of a comeback failing can harm members of a group mentally and i don’t want riize to go through that.
i support riize as a group so i'm not boycotting. i stream their music and watch their variety content and buy their merch because i like riize. this is going to ruffle some feathers but if you don't do any of those things SOLELY because your bias isn't involved than you're not a fan of the group! you are a solo stan! that is just a fact!
and telling me the boys would want me to boycott is literally insane. why are we putting words into their mouths? riize literally had a live recently damn near begging briize to stay with them and trust them. the words “we are closer as a group than you think” literally came from shotaro’s mouth...so i will choose to believe what has actually been expressed by the members instead of theory and hearsay spread by fans. if you want to boycott DO IT, but don’t try to guilt trip briize by saying the boys would want it.
all of the members have given up so much and have gone through so much to be in riize. sungchan literally dropped out of MIDDLE SCHOOL to train as an idol. eunseok dropped out and sohee turned down acceptance into a university to train. shotaro and anton literally moved away from their ENTIRE lives to pursue their dreams. you think i’m gonna make them suffer or let circumstances out of their control get in the way of THEIR success? i absolutely can't go for that i'm sorry.
and one last thing, i'm not trying to shame seunghan fans. i feel for y'all i really do. this may be perceived as snarky or rude, but this comes from a place of care. if it is so painful and upsetting stanning riize you shouldn't stan anymore. kpop is supposed to be fun! stanning a group is supposed to bring you little moments of happiness and it isn't supposed to cause so much turmoil or bad feelings! this isn't supposed to be this serious either!
also, i believe alot of my asks regarding seunghan or calling me an ot6 stem from me not writing for him. this is my account and i can post what i want. you guys can make your own account and post what you want. like you guys i'm a working class adult who posts little fics, lets remember that! i write for fun and to share it with people who wanna read it. i don't know why this account has gotten this crazy, or how i've made people so mad. you do not have to follow me or this account if this is an issue. i understand and i would much rather not have these asks or this energy on my page anymore.
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valentine-writes · 9 months
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Hello hello! Been downright dying over how much I love your AtSV work!! So I thought I would feed into it >:) If you're feeling up to it, whats been brewing in your mind about The Spot x reader? Take it platonic or romantic, either has so much potential for fun in my opinion and I guess I'm just interested in what ideas you might have?? Not a lot to work off of from what I'm asking but I hope you're able to have fun with it anyways ^^; Whether youre able to get to this request or not, thanks for reading! Love what you do :)
collision.
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「 tws + notes: possibly ooc, unedited, he's kind of pathetic little meow meowified im sorry, first bit inspired by @//submurged-into-clouds !! <3 」
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↳ ft. the spot
「 gn!reader, can be platonic or romantic <3 」
author's note: first, AUWJHEJSBS thank u so much!!!! im glad u like what i've written so far– and i am SUPER excited to write for the spot becuz im gon b real,,, there was a momentary lapse of insanity where i was scouring for any content of him at all. SO TY 4 UR REQ!!!! ( /)u(\ ) i hope this is ok!!! i got carried away and stuff so,, i hope this is at the Very Least coherent! leaned for platonic stuff with romantic undertones that intensify throughout so,, read it how u like ^_^
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▸ we're going to start this by establishing that bro has literally No Friends anymore. you met him after the collider incident and by some miracle, some sort of mercy from a higher power in the multiverse– you ended up becoming friends with him
really, meeting him was an accident. wasn't supposed to be anything more– just him messing around with his new abilities and slipping into a random universe with no idea where he was.
and there was you.
just you. out, alone at night. just taking a walk– disrupted by someone falling out of a weird portal from the sky.
this is the day your paths crossed, the day your fates intertwined, the moment that your world collided into his.
to put more literally: the day he crashed into you very unceremoniously.
im now re-reading the title and remembering his backstory and giggling at my unintentional joke. he is not catching a break. even from me.
▸ after recovering from a random stranger from another universe tumbling into your own, you began to talk.
now– you don't remember how the conversation started, but you were glad to listen. the way which he rambled to you, words tumbling out of his mouth like they'd been on his mind for a while– you felt like he needed someone to hear him.
he's surprised. you're not bothered. not frightened. not even weirded out. but you're not indifferent. you nod along, you comment on things here and there– but you listen. you actually listen to him.
eventually, when he leaves, you're sat there for a moment. just frozen– processing whether that had really happened or not. you see the indent his body left in the grass where the two of you sat. it's evidence enough for you.
a few weeks pass and you're certain that you were just fated to meet once and never again. you were fine with this.
▸ until he randomly popped up in your living room one day.
yes, he had been actively trying to find your universe again– and as casually as he can be, is now peeking from out the portal he created, head leaning in to get a better look at you.
you're not sure how you can tell considering he has no face,,, but he's definitely smiling.
he waves to you, awkwardly, (noticing that you're just staring at him while not saying a word), "thought i would say hi, so– ...hi."
you blink at him tiredly. "dude, it's 6:30 in the morning–"
he's treating this like it's normal for people to just show up in your house. he missed you– and it's very evident.
▸ no matter what type of relationship you're in with him: you GOTTA set boundaries. being one of the only people who cares to hang around him anymore means that you're gonna be seeing a lot of him.
while he certainly hasn't completely lost grasp on the concept of privacy, it's definitely been altered by the fact he's got powers that allow him to pop up wherever he wants. he's just a teeny bit invasive.
"hello!" he'll greet, randomly poking his head through a portal he made to your bedroom.
on instinct, you throw the closest thing to you. he's just glad you reached for the pillow and not the alarm clock also at your arms reach on the bedside table.
definitely a good idea to remind him that if he wants to hang out, he should probably message you, and if he wants to show up at your house for whatever reason, he should give you a heads up.
he has nearly walked in on you changing. and has apologized a million times every time it's brought up. it fr keeps him up at night.
▸ everyone in his life leaving him def messed him up a bit. he can deny it all he wants, but he's terribly anxious that you're gonna grow tired of him and leave.
constantly like "oh my god what if they leave for someone who has a face" and itz like,,, boy,,,, stfu itz 3am
he needs reassurance, even if he never explicitly says. but you're kind to him. patient. you're pretty much an angel in his eyes.
which is why he feels comfortable texting u in the dead of night like:
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(im gonna b real i dont even know why i have this image)
▸ he's dismissed by most people around him– but you've given him your time. you've shown him that you care. he's doing everything he can to be certain you'll still care for him.
the random waves of "oh no but what if they hate me" hit him HARD. especially if he hasn't seen you in a while, if you take longer to respond to his messages, if you haven't been answering his calls– bro will jump to a conclusion
"hypothesis: they dont love me anymore :("
☝️🤓 SORRY HAKJWOENDOEND he would NOT say that. im just clowning on him itz a part of my luv 4 him </3
needs to be needed. wants to be wanted.
eventually you have a long talk about this. he's got a bit of an ego after realizing how much power he truly possessed– but you gently encourage him to let it down. a simple heart to heart. and while you're certain these things aren't going to dissipate with a single conversation, you've let him know he doesn't have to deal with it alone.
▸ physical contact is a need for him. bro's touch starved. he likes linking his pinky with yours or just intertwining your fingers together. if you ever let him rest his head on your shoulder or hugged him he'd actually have to fight tears. he hasn't been given affection in a while :(
▸ he doesn't really feel like he has to hide anything around you. he really doesn't have much of a filter when you're talking to him which makes for some amusing conversation. he finds your laughter the sweetest sound in the world– he likes making you laugh :] it makes him feel like he's accomplished something
▸ the alterations to his body have caused some weird little changes that most people don't notice. one of them most noticeably to you– he'd cold. not frigid or like icy, but a lot colder than normal people tend to be.
you first notice this when you're hanging out in your bedroom. you're sitting on your bed, while he paces back and forth, rambling about another failed villainous act
(you haven't questioned his whole obsession with villainy considering that he seems pretty harmless with what he's been attempting– no matter how much he tries)
"and then– ohh, and tHEN THEY JUST—" you notice how he's gesturing frantically, exasperated, annoyed– and out of instinct to provide some sort of comfort (or at least calm him down) your hand grasps his wrist
there's a moment of silence.
his voice dwindles into a more soft, subdued tone, watching as your fingers wrap around his wrist. "wh– if you wanted me to stop talking, you could've just... just said or...."
his mind is going blank, trailing off at your touch. he doesn't remember the last time someone has held his hand or even brushed up against him without freaking out.
"you're cold." you comment, now taking his hand between both of yours, as if you were trying to heat him back up. you don't meet his eyes, simply staring at his hand.
"oh– yeah, yeah, it's just– a thing with now. came with the holes–"
the sensation of your hands gently squeezing his shuts him up. you raise his hand to your lips and gently blow hot air onto it.
your brow furrows, nose scrunching up. "you're still cold..." you mutter, more to yourself than to him. quietly, your gaze returns to his face.
"does that bother you?" you ask him, after a beat of silence.
he shakes his head. your hands let go of his– but he quietly reaches back to hold it again.
"hold on a second. why don't you try again?" he suggests. you laugh softly, knowing it's obviously just an excuse. still, you humor him.
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