#this is something that i think i relate to

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Do you have a list of good sex ed books to read?

BOY DO I

please bear in mind that some of these books are a little old (10+ years) by research standards now, and that even the newer ones are all flawed in some way. the thing about research on human beings, and especially research on something as nebulous and huge as sex, is that people are Always going to miss something or fail to account for every possible experience, and that's just something that we have to accept in good faith. I think all of these books have something interesting to say, but that doesn't mean any of them are the only book you'll ever need.

related to that: it's been A While since I've read some of these so sorry if anything in them has aged poorly (I don't THINK SO but like, I was not as discerning a reader when I was 19) but I am still including them as books that have been important to my personal journey as a sex educator.

additionally, a caveat that very few of these books are, like, instructional sex ed books in the sense of like "here's how the penis works, here's where the clit is, etc." those books exist and they're great but they're also not very interesting to me; my studies on sex are much more in the social aspect (shout out to my sociology degree) and the way people learn to think about sex and societal factors that shape those trends. these books reflect that. I would genuinely love to have the time to check out some 101 books to see how they fare, but alas - sex ed is not my day job and I don't have the time to dedicate to that, so it happens slowly when it happens at all. I've been meaning to read Dr. Gunter's Vagina Bible since it came out in 2019, for fucks sake.

and finally an acknowledgement that this is a fairly white list, which has as much to do with biases with academia and publishing as my own unchecked biases especially early in my academic career and the limitations of my university library.

ANYWAY here's some books about sex that have been influential/informative to me in one way or another:

The Trouble With Normal: Sex, Politics, and the Ethics of Queer Life (Michael Warner, 1999)

Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences (Laura M. Carpenter, 2005)

Sex Goes to School: Girls and Sex Education Before the 1960s (Susan K. Freeman, 2008)

Bonk: The Curious Coupling of Science and Sex (Mary Roach, 2008)

Transgender History: The Roots of Today's Revolution (Revised Edition) (Susan Stryker, 2008)

The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity is Hurting Young Women (Jessica Valenti, 2009)

Not Under My Roof: Parents, Teens, and the Culture of Sex (Amy T. Schalet, 2011)

Rewriting the Rules: An Integrative Guide to Love, Sex and Relationships (Meg-John Barker, 2013)

The Sex Myth: The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Realities (Rachel Hills, 2015)

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Tranform Your Sex Life (Emily Nagoski, 2015)

Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men (Jane Ward, 2015)

Too Hot to Handle: A Global History of Sex Education (Jonathan Zimmerman, 2015)

American Hookup: The New Culture of Sex on Campus (Lisa Wade, 2017)

Histories of the Transgender Child (Jules Gill-Peterson, 2018)

Revolting Prostitutes: The Fight for Sex Workers' Rights (Juno Mac and Molly Smith, 2018)

Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex (Angela Chen, 2020)

Pleasure in the News: African American Readership and Sexuality in the Black Press (Kim Gallon, 2020)

A Curious History of Sex (Kate Lister, 2020)

Boys & Sex: Young Men on Hookups, Love, Porn, Consent, and Navigating the New Masculinity (Peggy Orenstein, 2020)

Black Women, Black Love: America's War on Africa American Marriage (Dianne M. Stewart, 2020)

The Tragedy of Heterosexuality (Jane Ward, 2020)

Hurts So Good: The Science and Pleasure of Pain on Purpose (Leigh Cowart, 2021)

The Right to Sex: Feminist in the Twenty-First Century (Amia Srinivasan, 2021)

Love Your Asian Body: AIDS Activism in Los Angeles (Eric C. Wat, 2021)

Superfreaks: Kink, Pleasure, and the Pursuit of Happiness (Arielle Greenberg, 2023)

[steddiecameraroll]

“Oh my god, Robin.” Steve is whispering into the mouth piece of his desk phone, begging she can hear him. Because he’s not going to be removing his hovering hand from over his mouth, while he groans into the phone, risking being overheard.

“What?” She sounds exasperated but not annoyed.

“You know the new guy? The one starting in IT today?”

“Yeah?” He can hear her clicking the ballpoint pen he thought he hid last week.

“He is so hot, and I need your help finding out if he plays for our team.”

“Your team, Steve. If he played for my team, this would be a different conversation. Why can’t you figure it out yourself?”

“Because Mike was the one that brought him by and you know how Mike feels about me. I’m pretty sure he told Eddie I was an asshole or something because he barely made eye contact. I don’t want to come on too strong and then I make it worse if he’s straight.” Steve glances over his cube wall to ensure no one’s listening. “Please, do this for me and I’ll buy you tacos for lunch.”

“Fine, oh speak of the devil. Here they come.” Steve hears her chair squeak. “I’ll call you back.”

They hang up and Steve leans in his chair trying to peer down the aisle and see if he can watch the interaction. Robin’s desk isn’t quite down the line so he can only see the top of Mike and Eddie’s head. Neither of their skulls are giving anything away so he sighs and accepts he’ll have to wait for Robin’s call.

After a painstaking 7 minutes Steve’s phone rings. He grabs it immediately and grunts an acknowledgment.

“Um.”

Steve’s stomach drops because that’s not Robin’s voice. “Sorry, this is Steve.”

“Hey, um, it’s Eddie. We just met.”

“Yeah,” Steve’s voice lilts up. “What’s up?”

“Oh, Robin said you had a question about something.” Of course she did.

“Uh, did she mention what it was about?” He’s going to murder her.

“No,” he sounds annoyed.

Think quick. “I was…do you play softball? I’m on a league and we’re always looking for new players.”

“No?” He’s probably wondering why he had Robin ask him to call. “Not really a sports guy.”

“Oh, yeah ok. That makes sense.” Steve rubs the back of his neck scrambling for conversation.

“Why does that make sense?”

Shit. “No, I just noticed your rings and nail polish. I can never keep polish on my nails during the season. Gets chipped too easily.” Eddie hums some kind of acknowledgment that Steve can’t interpret. “You’re probably in a band or something, way cooler than softball.” Steve sighs and needs to get out of this shit show of a conversation stat.

“I play guitar,” Eddie states simply.

“See? Yeah, so much cooler than softball. I never learned how to play anything. Wanted to, thought it would get me more chicks in high school.” Steve realizes what that sounds like and rushes to add. “Or anyone now.”

“Yeah, ok. Was there something computer related you needed help with?”

Steve wants to jump off the fifth floor of this building because why is he such a disaster at this? “Sorry, no. You’re probably busy. It was nice meeting you.”

“Yeah, you too, man.”

“Bye,” Eddie doesn’t respond and Steve drops the receiver down like he wants the floor to open up and swallow him whole.

“Well that was embarrassing.” Steve whips around to see Robin hovering behind him. “I set you up an easy hit and that’s what you do with it?” She has her right hand on her hip and her left hanging on the edge of his cube wall.

“You sabotaged me.” He points his finger at her then pushes himself to his feet. He needs more coffee.

“I did nothing of the sort.” She follows close behind as he weaves through the maze toward the break room.

“Yes you did. I asked you to find out and keep me away from the entire thing. You didn’t even send me a courtesy Slack message. This does not equal tacos.”

“Not fair!” She whines as he pushes the door open with his shoulder.

“It’s only fair since you didn’t do anything. I was the one who looked like an idiot fumbling to come up with something to say to the guy because my best friend refused to find out if he’s queer on her own.”

Robin’s eyes are wide and she’s not speaking which slightly terrifies Steve. He turns around to see the man of the hour pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“Hmm,” Eddie tuts, then leans against the counter with a level of nonchalance that shouldn’t be doing something for Steve. “That explains that. Glad I won’t be obsessing the rest of the day about what in the world the hot guy was going on about.”

Eddie’s eyes flick up to Steve and when Steve sees the corner of Eddie’s mouth tick up he can’t help it when a blush spreads across his cheeks. Steve thinks he hears Robin back out of the room but he’s not going to turn around to verify.

“My band has a show this Friday. You should come.” He says while pushing his body away from the counter and stalking toward Steve.

“Yeah,” Steve watches the man move closer.

“I’ll email you the info.” Eddie stops a foot in front of Steve, much too close for casual, and it sends a rush of butterflies through his gut. “Harrington, right?”

“Uh huh.”

“Cool,” Eddie puts his hands on Steve’s shoulder and gives it a squeeze as he steps past. “Oh and it’s too bad you don’t paint your nails more. I bet your fingers look pretty wrapped around…that bat.” Steve feels the weight of the pause and so does his dick if the twitch it gives means anything. “See ya later, man.”

When Eddie disappears through the doorway and Steve’s alone he exhales loudly just before Robin’s pushing her way back into the break room.

“Soooooo?”

“Wanna split the carne asada plate?”

“Yes!” She fist bumps into the air. “Knew it.”

“Also, how does manicures at lunch tomorrow sound?” She cocks her head at him. “He thinks my fingers would look good painted when holding-“

“Don’t!” She interrupts.

“A baseball bat,” he says innocently.

“Uh huh,” she narrows her eyes. “As long as you’re driving, I’m game.”

[mysteryshoptls]

SSR Vil Schoenheit - Tsumsitter Voice Lines

Due to event restrictions, Groovy related lines are locked until the event has been cleared. I will update once these are unlocked.

When Summoned: I always give my all and look my best, no matter what. Tsum, are you capable of doing that?

Summon Line: You look like you're dying to say something... But if you even think of saying that this peanut and I are in any way alike, you will regret it.

Groooovy!!: --LOCKED--

Home: Carry yourself with dignity, tsum.

Home Idle 1: As long as you are to stay with us in Pomefiore, make sure to behave properly with grace and poise. I will not be any less strict just because you are a tsum.

Home Idle 2: I'll be heading out on a run with the tsum. Would you like to join? You're more than welcome to refuse if you're happy with having poor physical condition.

Home Idle 3: Idia's tsum has horrendous dark circles under its eyes, and lacks basic skin and hair care... It didn't have to be that similar to the real person.

Home Idle - Login: --LOCKED--

Home Idle - Groovy: --LOCKED--

Home Tap 1: Since they're saying you are my split image, you absolutely should be aiming for the top. Don't you dare let someone else take the top-most position when you are stacking atop each other, either.

Home Tap 2: I saw Ruggie's tsum moving to and fro in the Mystery Shop... It's not actually working there, is it?

Home Tap 3: I saw the tsum Silver is taking care of was sleeping so peacefully. It would be miraculous if the other tsums could be just as calm.

Home Tap 4: I can't believe it. The tsum plastered glitter all over itself and walked the dormitory halls, so the floors are now completely covered in glitter... Does it think that it is actually wearing makeup!?

Home Tap 5: You want to pet the tsum, but it keeps running away? Well, of course it would. It's terrible manners to try and touch someone so suddenly. You should ask them for permission, first.

Home Tap - Groovy: --LOCKED--

Duo: [VIL]: Good choice, Silver. [SILVER]: Vil-senpai, FEVER!

Requested by Anonymous.

[thegoldencontracts]

Prefect

Azul is your boyfriend. Yes, boyfriend, as in, person you're in intimate and romantic relations with. So why, just why is he still calling you Prefect?

Notes: credit to @/cephalo-punk for the idea... Im sorry for my sins, reader is the Prefect, GN reader as usual

You and Azul had a wonderful relationship, really. Wonderful, and romantic, and everything. It was safe to say you two were closing, dating, even. Yes, you two were dating. For months now.

And what did people usually call their partners whom they were dating? Their first name, maybe a petname. They usually dropped the titles.

But not Azul. No, Azul could never drop the title you held. Why? Who knew?

"Prefect!" Azul's voice pulled you out of your frying pan of rage only to plummet you into its fire. Ah, yes, that 'nickname'. That damned nickname. "Would you like to dine together this weekend? My treat, of course. I secured a reservation to that restaurant you kept ogling on our trips together. I know, I truly am a benevolent soul."

And yet, immediately your rage was quelled. Azul was asking to take you out on a date. And especially this week - Finals' must've left him completely swamped, no? But he did. And he even got a reservation to that one place that you somehow forgot the name of! Sure, you didn't remember the name, but you did remember that those reservations were super hard to get.

So, did the Prefect thing really matter that much?

"I'll gladly go on a date with you, Azul!" You said. Azul's lips jutted out ever so slightly.

"A 'date' is one way to call it, I suppose," he said. "Really, Prefect-"

Nevermind. In an instant, your mood was dampened by that stupid term of address. He loved you enough to go through all this trouble, and you really appreciated that, honest! You just wanted him to use your goddamn name!

Wait. You had an idea.

"Fine, fine, I'll stop teasing you," you said. "Housewarden Ashengrotto."

Azul looked at you in confusion.

"Housewarden Ashengrotto?"

"That's you, silly!" You said, like you didn't know the real reason behind his question.

Azul's face puckered up in displeasure, like he'd just eaten a sour lemon. He stayed silent for a while before speaking up again.

"Have I done something to offend you, Prefect?" He asked.

"Nope!" You said. "Why, Housewarden Ashengrotto?"

Azul's eye twitched.

"You've decided not to call me by my name all of a sudden," he said.

You smirked.

"Well, since you don't call me by mine, I thought we'd be on even footing!"

The realization hit Azul like a truck. His eyes widened, only to narrow as his cheeks flushed in an indignated pout.

"W-Well- that's different, er-" Azul sighed. "Does it truly upset you that greatly?"

You couldn't help but soften up a bit at that. He really didn't mean you any harm, even if you did still think it was uncharacteristically stupid of him.

"How does it feel when I call you Housewarden?" You asked. His face darkened.

"Point taken."

"Good," you said. "So, why don't you try calling me by my name?"

Azul's eyes widened.

"E-Eh?"

"You heard me. We should be on even footing, right, Housewarden Ashengrotto?"

Azul gulped. If he wanted you to call him by his name again, he'd have to do this, and obviously he was going to, since it was clearly important to you, but...

It was hard.

"O-Of course," he said. "E-Er, Pre- ah-"

And then he said your name. Without "-san" added as an honorific. Nothing of the sort, just your name.

You smiled.

"Yes, Azul?"

And just hearing his name again made Azul beam.

"Why don't we go to your place? It's getting rather late."

"I would love that."

[dunmeshistash]

Literally right after I saw one of ur Milsiril posts today I saw another person doing a Mithrun analysis with a huge focus on Milsiril only helping him bc of ulterior motives and it makes me sad :( She’s such a soft mum that would teach her children anything. If anything she’s less overbearing than my Chinese mother

What are the arguments? I don't really get what she gets from helping Mithrun. I guess the thing she would be able to get is making him fight the demon.

But like, she's no longer a canary and there isn't really much to hint that's what she wants. This is her part in Kabru's version

My boy really fairy tale-fied his backstory, it just ends with "And from that point onward Mithrun lived only to slay demons. He ate even though he had no desire to eat. He lived on, even though he had no desire to live."

Which is objectively false, in this version it really seems like she lets him live cause he can still be used, but he can't.

This doesn't really look like a killing machine that can be used to fight demons does it. Kabru as usual oversimplified what happened cause as he said "the world doesn't need to know personal things like that"

Again with his timeline vs Kabru's

Utaya started and ended while he was still recovering, 20 years from being saved to being appointed as a captain again. I know elves see time differently but even if we do the divided by 5 that's still the equivalent of 4 years of his life if he was a tallman. I don't think that's a negligible amount of time and honestly I'm happy Ryoko Kui considered that recovery from something so traumatic isn't fast or easy.

I said Milsiril only started to help with his rehabilitation after she retired because of this bit. "Mithrun. I saw a demon in Utaya" the situation from arrival to destruction was at most one year, I can't imagine she was able to leave in the middle of it just to visit Mithrun?

So I always assumed she did it after retiring (perhaps one of the first things she did since she's still in canary uniform)

Even if she left in the middle the earliest this could have happened is 498 so at most from his 20 years of rehabilitation Milsiril was with him for 2. At the most.

To me her smile here is cause she's seeing a way to motivate him to eat

Doesn't really look like someone sinister or with ulterior motives to me, she has her eyebrows slighty furrowed and a forced tight smile. To me it looks like she's worried. The other point is that right before this scene this is what she says

Here she has a soft smile as she remembers that he was someone similar to her. I think she didn't kill him because she saw herself in him, and I think she tried to help him for a similar reason. "It was such a warped, convoluted place built from inferiority jealousy lies and anger" "We might have hit it off pretty well"

She isn't saying that to judge him she's saying that and acknowledging he was just like her. I don't think the fact she relates to him would have been set up right before she tries to motivate him to eat to show "ulterior motives".

If anything I think the ulterior motive she has is that she sees herself in him, and wants to help him to help herself. Which as 'ulterior motives' go I think it's fine.

Everytime I talk about Milsiril I end up with a huge text lmao, I think I might be repeating myself too but I wish I understood the arguments for a sinister Milsiril using Mithrun. I don't really see anything in the extras that could indicate that. And the biggest "proof" is a intentionally abridged version of Mithrun's backstory told by Kabru that ignores all of his interpersonal relationships in favor of a easy to understand cautionary tale.

Oh yeah, and Mithrun's bitchy past self that didn't trust or like anyone saying it,

[slfcare]

♡ things about people's bodies that i admire (as someone with a physical disability who cannot relate) ⌁ the way you take your steps so easily. you want to go somewhere and you lift your foot and put it down and move without too much thought or being Overly Aware of how to do it? that's so cool

⌁ when you move not just individual fingers but bend them a certain way. how fluid your movements are. also how much control you have. you're telling me you pick up a plastic cup like no problem and you never accidentally squeeze or put too much pressure?

⌁ typing with ten fingers. again, hello???? you can move ALL of them individually like that? and so fast? huh?????

⌁ rushing down stairs is insane to me because you just keep your balance and also watch your step and also move your legs that fast

⌁ nothing is impossible. you button the world's smallest buttons. then you walk to a cafe and order something in a full cup and carry it to a table without spilling, then you write on paper with a pen for more than 3 seconds at a time and the strokes come out exactly as you intend and that’s a regular day for you!!

⌁ you speak to people and have no problems with the muscles in and around your lips. you probably don’t even think about them. they don’t pull to the side or jerk when you pronounce your vowels – they’re as fluid as your fingers (amazing) and people take your words seriously because of this

you have a lot to appreciate, just as I have a lot to admire in you ♡

[coquettebratzdoll]

ᡣ𐭩 •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅

Okay a while ago I made this post talking abt how I haven't shifted yet bc I'm lazy, and while the sentiment holds true, I made some advancements is my beliefs. I've come to the realisation that I wasn't lazy, I just lacked some things 😭😭. Since many of you guys seemed to relate to my struggle, I'll go over what I found to be lacking and how I am fixing it:

1. Persistence - I just wasn't persisting in the fact that I am a master shifter. Some days I believed, only to give up a few hours later. I let the 3d tell me stuff that was literally not true. Like okay not you tryna be relevant gtfo 💀💀

2. Direction - I had no clear goal in mind. Like ofc I wanted to shift, but I was switching up on myself every half hour. First, I want to shift by xyz date, but then I change my mind and say that I'll shift tonight. So by the time night actually came around, I would just say one aff then give up on myself.

3. Mindset - talking abt giving up on myself, my mindset is all over the place rn. I don't hate myself (far from it), but I do not believe in myself. It's even crazier cus I KNOW I can shift, and I HAVE SHIFTED multiple times to realities like this one 😭😭. Ik that it has to be real, but I am limiting myself by believing that I personally can't shift (or don't deserve to). I know that it is possible to shift with doubts, but if you don't believe in yourself, where will that get you.

4. Methods - there are a plethora of methods that I can choose from to aid my shifting, but I just don't resonate with the traditional methods of shifting. I know that you don't need a method to shift, but I wish someone told me sooner how little methods actually matter. Lemme be honest, I've never been a Type A planner person. Steps and instructions aren't my strong suite. I prefer to be 'lazy' and just go with the flow.

So now that I listed my problems, here are my solutions !!

For persistence, I'm just gonna shut my ass up and do it 💀💀. Like ik 4d is the only reality that matters, so imma continue to hold true in that assumption.

As for direction, imma focus on one dr for now. I'll also gaslight myself so badly yall just wait 😭🙏

Mindset is gonna be the most exposing one lmao. Imma do some shadow work to find the root cause of the problem and deal with it from the source.

For methods, imma use the law of assumption to my benefit. I alr apply it to everything else, so why not shifting ? I'll also add on lucid dreams cus they're fun 💀💀

Overall, this really made me think harder about why I am so 'lazy' when it comes to shifting and inspired me to do something about it. I hope you do the same :)

[heizlut]

Closing the Distance

ꕀ cw: mention of blood/injury (nonsexual related)

ꕀ tags: fem!reader, inexperienced and possibly ooc!calcharo, oral f!receiving, first-time sex, breeding kink, creampie, mostly proofread

ꕀ nsfw under the cut

ꕀ m!list here

Calcharo didn't expect this at all. He only agreed to help you find and fight against the tacet discords that had sprung up from a particularly strong tacet field. But here you were, laying underneath him and looking up at him with big eyes, your chest heaving with heavy breaths and your lips looking quite inviting.

All he was trying to do was get you out of harm's way by practically tackling you to the ground and caging you in with his own body as the final tacet discord emitted an explosive energy as it was struck down. It wasn't anything special, he swears it's not.

You clear your throat awkwardly, blush evident on your cheeks, "You can uh... get off me now..." You avert your gaze, unable to properly look him in the eyes, not now, and not since you felt something particularly...hard brush against your stomach. Your words snap Calcharo out of his daze, heat rising to his own pale features, "Ah, y-yes. I apologize..." He moves off of you and stands up, extending his hand towards you to help you up as well.

You take it, pulling yourself up and let go abruptly, "Thanks for your help today." Calcharo looks down at his hand where the warmth of your touch still lingered, then curls it into a fist, "It was no problem." The air felt heavy and awkward. There was something bubbling up inside of him that felt wholly unfamiliar. He rolls his eyes at himself and he turns away from you. Why was he acting like this? As if he's never seen a pretty girl before... How pathetic.

He peeks over at you as you absorb the echoes, taking in your strong but soft form. Calcharo could at least admit he found you to be a strong fighter, you were part of the Ghost Hounds after all. He was familiar with you, so why was he feeling like this now. He's never had time to form a romantic relationship with anyone nor has he ever felt the need to. He had more important things to worry about than getting his dick wet and being all soft with someone.

You meet he gaze, noticing that he's staring at you again with his intense blue-grey eyes. You raise a brow as you walk back over to him, "What's the matter with you today? You seem off." Calcharo huffs, looking annoyed as he turns his face away from you and crosses his arms, his voice deep and monotone as usual, "I'm fine." You study him for a moment and then shrug, "Whatever you say. Let's get going." As you move past him, Calcharo notices your gait, "You're limping."

You freeze in your tracks, having hoped that whatever was bothering him would keep him distracted enough to not notice. He already did so much for you today, you wanted to handle your injury yourself. You feel his large hand on your shoulder as he stops beside you, "Why didn't you say anything?" You want to shrug off his hand, but you don't; instead you sigh, "It's not a big deal. Let's just-" "No", Calcharo cuts you off quickly, moving in front of you, "At least let me take a look."

"I don't think that's such a good idea...", you say a little softer than you had liked. Remaining stern and stoic as ever, Calcharo crosses his arms as he looks down at you, "And why would that be?" His question sounds icy and he must've realized it because he tone softens when he speaks again, "You're injured and I wouldn't be a very good leader if I didn't look out for another member." Thunder rumbles in the distance, a sure sign that a storm was on its way. You look down and then grab his arm, surprising him, "Fine. But let's not be out in the open..."

⌁ϟ༒︎ϟ⌁⌁ϟ༒︎ϟ⌁⌁ϟ༒︎ϟ⌁

If you hadn't been injured and limping, the two of you wouldn't be soaked from the rain you had gotten caught in. Slamming the wooden door shut of the run-down cabin you found in the woods, you immediately sink down onto the floor. "How did you know this place was...", Calcharo's voice trails off as his blue-grey eyes find the growing patch of blood on your upper thigh, immediately crouching down to your level.

His intense eyes take in your features, your face flushed red from a slight fever and a couple droplets of water run down your face to your neck. Calcharo's hand reaches for your wounded thigh before pausing, hovering right over the wound, "May I?" You grit your teeth and nod. With uncharacteristically shaky hands, he undoes your pants and helps you lift your hips off the ground as he lowers them. In his head, he repeats over and over that this is just to treat you. That's it!

But he can't help glancing at your cotton panties... There was nothing particularly special about them, but the way they hugged your hips, pressing close against your pussy underneath; it had him inadvertently licking his lips. Calcharo shakes his head and looks to the open cut on your thigh. He does his best to make sure his voice comes out even as he speaks, "It's not too deep. There's just a lot of blood from straining yourself." You point to your bag, "There's a first aid kit in there..."

With a single nod, he grabs the bag and rummages through it til his fingers brush against the small first aid box. He grabs it and mentally prepares himself to give you stitches while also trying so damn hard to stop from popping a boner at the sight of you.

You were injured, for fucks sake! Now wasn't the time to suddenly sprout inappropriate thoughts that he had never had an issue with before. Sensing his hesitation, you practically snatch the kit from his hands, making him blink in shock.

Though flushed with a bit of a fever, drenched from the rain, and injured, you still have the nerve to narrow your eyes at him, "I can do it myself." His jaw hangs open for a moment but he quickly shuts it, returning to his usual cold demeanor, "Fine." He sits back, watching as you thread the curved needle and piece your own flesh as you stitch yourself up. Mentally he cringes on your behalf, but you barely react as your skin closes with the thread.

If anything, seeing just how strong you are, not just physically, but mentally, it makes things even harder for him, quite literally. His cock throbs in his pants and he presses down on it, willing it to just go the fuck away. After tying up the thread and cleaning off the remaining blood, you look his way, noticing his hands pressing down in his lap and you raise a brow, a weak smirk playing on your lips, "Are you seriously hard right now?"

Calcharo's eyes flick to yours, all wide-eyed as he looks at you, then he frowns and looks away, "No, I'm not." You breathe out a laugh that does nothing to help the ache in his pants, "Really? Then move your hands." Calcharo grimaces, his nose scrunched in what looks similar to a snarling dog, "I don't want to." You just shrug, looking amused albeit still a bit weak from your condition, "Suit yourself then. It just looks like you're having a bit of a rough time."

He turns his body away from you, not wanting to listen to anymore of your teasing. "It wouldn't be very nice of me to not show my gratitude to my leader for helping me so much today...", you trail off with a teasing lilt in your voice. Calcharo straightens up and peeks at your over his shoulder, "What do you mean...'show your gratitude'?" Hook, line, and sinker. You put on a more nonchalant look and sigh heavily, "I'm simply saying that since you helped me out..." You look into his eyes again, "I could help you out as well."

Too many thoughts race through Calcharo's mind. How could he even take you up on that offer, especially when you're injured. Especially since he shouldn't be having thoughts like this. Especially because you were special to him. Wait... You were... special to him? When did he feel this way towards you? I mean, sure he always went with you whenever you were itching for a fight and he did talk with you a little more frequently than the others, albeit not too much.

You can tell his mind is racing, so you lean forward, ignoring the bit of pain in your wounded thigh, and place your hand on his shoulder, "Just quit thinking, Calcharo." Your hushed voice and hot breath fan across his ear, sending tingles straight down to his cock. Fuck it. He turns around and faces you once more, his face close to yours as he speaks low and deep, "I don't want to hurt you." His eyes are on yours, but yours are on his lips as you speak again, "You won't."

Before he can protest again, your lips are on his in a soft, but demanding kiss. Calcharo is frozen for a moment, having never done this before. Hell, he's never done anything romantic or sexual in the past. But the plush softness of your lips on his has him beginning to melt. He returns the kiss hesitantly at first, but once he finds the right rhythm with you, he finds himself leaning into you more. His hands are on your flushed cheeks and your heat radiates into his palms.

Your tongue prods his lower lip, begging for entrance to which he allows, parting his lips as you tongue slips in and moves against his. It's a slippery feeling, but you taste so sweet.

Without having realized it, Calcharo has you caged in underneath him yet again, although this time is was special. Your legs are spread to accommodate his body between your legs and your fingers are tangled in his wet, but long silver hair.

Your lips brush against his, "As much as I'd like to help and take things over, my injury-" Calcharo cuts you off with a kiss, "I know. Tell me what to do and I'll do it." His voice sounds husky and breathless, needy for more of you. You grab his hand and place it on your breast, making his breath hitch, "You can touch me."

He looks down at where his hand rests on your breast, taking in the way it fills his palm so perfectly, and he squeezes lightly. Truthfully, he wants your shirt off so he can feel the soft skin against his own calloused hands.

Calcharo's eyes go to yours and his fingers hover over the buttons of your shirt, "May I?" You chuckle a little at his formality, "Please do." With your affirmation, he unbuttons your shirt, tugging the material gently down your shoulders. He takes in the sight of you under him in just a bra and panties. You truly were a sight to see. Without asking for permission again, he fumbles with the clasp of your bra before eventually unhooking it and sliding it off.

Calcharo licks his lips again when he finally sees your bare breasts, so round and perfect. His hand makes its way back to your breasts, gently palming them. His thumb flicks over your nipple, making you draw in a breath. His gaze break away from your chest and back up to your face in alarm, "Did I hurt you?" You smile tiredly at him and shake your head, "No, it felt good." Calcharo visibly relaxes and returns his attention back to your chest.

Leaning down, he captures one of your nipples in his mouth, his tongue sliding over the pert bud as you let out a soft sounding moan. His eyes flit up to watch your reactions as he continues with his ministrations. All he wants is for you to feel good even if he's not entirely sure what he's doing. But from the look on your face, your lips parted and brows knitted together, he can tell he's doing well so far and that's all he needs to know to keep going.

Calcharo presses little kisses from your breasts, to your stomach, then pauses above your covered cunt. Without a word, you shakily raise your hips, signalling him to remove your panties and continue on. He bites his lip, nervous as hell, but he didn't know when he would get an opportunity like this again. So he slides your panties down, ever so careful to not have the material rub against your wound on it's way down your legs.

With you panties off and your pussy now exposed to him, Calcharo feels like he's in a daze. You raise your hips yet again with a raised brow, "Well? Haven't you done this before?" Calcharo looks away from you, not wanting to confirm nor deny, feeling too embarrassed to say you were his first everything.

Your sweet voice pulls him back in, "You're so unlike yourself right now. Where'd my confident leader go, huh?" You were only half teasing as you spoke, just wanting him to move on from your first quip.

Hearing you call him your leader stirs something inside of him. Calcharo feels like he has something to prove. You were right, he did everything with a cold confidence, so he could certainly do this. Calcharo lowers himself to your pussy, his lips so close to touching. With a quick look back up to you, he lightly licks at your clit. It's experimental at first, just small little licks to test out your reaction. But once he sees how turned on you are, he dives right in.

It's sloppy and wet, but Calcharo has no intention of stopping now. His tongue prods and licks at your entrance, lapping up your arousal as it coats his tongue. His cock twitches as he mindlessly grinds against the floor. Your beautiful moans and shaky breaths only spur him on and make him feel even more brave. His calloused thumb rubs at your clit in time with his tongue lashing between your folds.

Your hands fly to his hair, pressing his mouth further into your pussy as you cry out his name, "C-calcharo! 'm cumming-ngh!" The taste of you flooded his senses and he simply could not get enough. He grips your hips, keeping his mouth latched onto your soaked cunt as though it was his first and last meal he'd ever have, groaning as if he were the one on the receiving end. You try to push his face away, "S-stop! Too much-ngh!- 'm sensitive!"

Calcharo knew he should stop, but your moans and the way your arousal flowed from you was way too delicious. His tongue flicks over you clit once more, making your legs shake as you moan loudly, releasing on his tongue once more. Finally being merciful, Calcharo removes his mouth from your pussy, your juices and his own saliva glisten on his lips and chin, but he doesn't have a care in the world right in this moment.

Your breasts move in time with your heavy breathing and you narrow your eyes up at him, "You're so lucky I'm injured right now..." Calcharo's eyebrows furrow, cocking his head to the side slightly, "But you liked it." You can't keep your glare when he's looking at you like some confused puppy, although quite the scary looking puppy... You look down, spotting the wet patch on his pants, "Just take your pants off. It looks like your cock is ready to burst."

Calcharo's eyes widen at your straightforwardness, but he immediately schools his expression, "...Right." He undoes his belt harness, letting it drop to the floor with a soft clank of the metal. Next, he pops open the button of his pants and lowers the zipper, tugging his pants and briefs down just enough to free his cock. His cock springs forward, large and veiny, twitching and leaking profusely.

You're in awe of his size and if you had known he was packing that much down there, you would've intentionally tried to get yourself in this situation much sooner. With one hand, he holds his aching cock and covers his face with the other, "Why are you staring so intensely?" Seeing the state he's in makes you laugh. The sound of it makes his length twitch and he peeks at you through his fingers, sounding a bit annoyed, "What's so amusing to you?"

You give him a genuine, yet cheeky smile, "I just... Never thought I'd see such an intimidating guy like yourself get so flustered." Calcharo groans at your teasing remark and lowers his hand from his face, his other hand absentmindedly stroking his cock, "Enough of your teasing."

You spread your legs a little more, careful not to strain your injury, "By all means, please continue. I promise I won't tease you anymore." "Hmph...", Calcharo does his best to look displeased, but there's too much longing and desperation in his eyes for it to be even remotely convincing.

He lines his leaking tip up with your awaiting entrance, but pauses, "Just tell me if it's too much, alright?" With a nod from you, pressure begins to build as he pushes his length slowly inside of your tight, wet cunt.

Cacharo's face scrunches with pleasure and he sucks in a breath, the feeling of being inside of you, inside of anyone for the first time has him struggling not to cum right then and there. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down to you, speaking softly, "It's okay. You can move now."

He whines at the affirmation and begins to thrust slowly, trying to keep himself calm so as to not cum immediately or hurt you from going too hard too fast. His muscular arms cage you in and his silver hair cascades over his shoulders.

His blue-grey eyes lock on yours as he keeps his steady pace. Calcharo's voice is strained when he speaks through gritted teeth, "This feels too good..." He groans as his hips make contact with yours, his cock pressing deep inside of you.

You press a kiss to the corner of his lips, whispering against them, "Then keep going." Calcharo's cock jumps inside of you and he starts thrusting a little faster, a little harder, "F-fuck..." He kisses you deeply, his tongue tangling with yours as his cock fucks into you. All you both can do is whimper and moan between relentless kisses as he comes closer and closer to orgasm.

His thoughts are only on how fucking good you tight pussy feels squeezing around his cock and how badly he wants to breed you with his cum. Gods, what he wouldn't do to see your stomach growing round with his kids.

Fuck, what the hell is even thinking right now. He can't even own a dog, let alone raise a kid, it was too dangerous. But your pussy and your hold on him was way more dangerous to him. He had to keep going.

Calcharo growls out a low groan, "I'm gonna cum -fuck- take it all. Please, please take it -ngh- all!" With a harsh, deep thrust, he releases his warm seed inside of you. His cock throbbing as his cum pours from his tip and the excess drips down to the floor.

He presses his sweaty forehead against yours, the heat from your fever seeping into his skin. Fuck, you had a fever and were injured... He pulls out of you, making you whimper at the feeling of emptiness.

His eyes flick over to your stitched wound, eyes wide as he sees some of the stitches had popped open and fresh blood was trickling down the side of your thigh, "I-I apologize. I shouldn't have-mmph!" Your lips on his shuts him up and when you pull away, you only smile tiredly at him, "I'm fine. Quit worrying about me." Calcharo's expression shows just how much he's struggling with all of this. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt you or make anything worse.

You tug a strand of his long, silver hair, bringing his attention back to you, "If you really feel that bad then I guess you'll have to make it up to me another time." Calcharo's eyebrows furrow, but then his expression softens slightly, "Of course. As your leader, I-" You cut him off quickly, "No, not so much as my leader. But as my partner. How does that sound?"

He's stunned for a moment but then clears his throat, trying to keep his typical brooding expression, "We can't. I don't want you to get hurt." You roll your eyes and look up at him, speaking in a resolute tone, "This is different. I'm not just some civilian, I'm part of the Ghost Hounds just like you. I can handle whatever danger comes my way or else I wouldn't be here right now." Calcharo processes your words for a second, then sighs, "Fine. But don't say I didn't warn you."

Your expression brightens, "I'm pretty sure that's similar to what you said to me when I first joined." Calcharo rolls his eyes as he gathers your clothes and his, "Whatever. I meant it as much then as I do now." You just breathe a small laugh, "Of course. I think we'll be just fine."

⌁ϟ༒︎ϟ⌁⌁ϟ༒︎ϟ⌁⌁ϟ༒︎ϟ⌁⌁ϟ

a/n: calcharo is a cutie patootie under that tough exterior, i just know it🥺

[mapiforpresident]

Final req: Aitana x reader

team is celebrating the final win and either aitana or Reader gets drunk and confesses their feeling to the other?

Confessions

Aitana x reader

warnings: alcohol

~~~

You liked to party. Being surrounded by your best friends, Pina, Patri, and Cata, meant that right now you really, really liked to party. The private club where your team was celebrating had an open bar and good music, and you were taking full advantage of it.

Having scored the opening goal of the 3-0 win against Lyon, you were currently on cloud nine.

"I'm going to get another drink," you shouted to Pina, who you were currently dancing with. "You want another too?" you added.

"Sure, hurry back, these two clowns over here are getting out of hand," Pina replied as you both glanced toward Patri and Cata trying to do some sort of dance-off while both holding two beers. You were glad Alexia was in the corner with Olga ignoring the rest of you, or you were sure she would lecture the four of you, probably something related to good choices, logical thinking, and alcohol poisoning.

You stepped up to the bar and ordered. While you were waiting, you turned your head and saw Aitana walking towards you, and your breath immediately hitched in your throat. She looked absolutely stunning in her tight dress and medal gleaming around her neck in the club lights.

You had been hopelessly in love with the Ballon d'Or winner for over a year now. You had tried so many ways to get over your crush, but absolutely nothing was working. It had gotten so bad that you took private Catalan lessons just to impress her.

You knew Aitana didn't like you back because you didn't even think she liked girls. The only time she had ever mentioned a partner was a childhood boyfriend. She also didn't really interact with you unless it was in a group setting or at training. Your fellow English internationals were the only two that knew about your crush after they questioned you on why you were so adamant about learning Catalan even though you really only needed to know Spanish to get through training.

You grabbed your drinks and started to turn back towards the dance floor, trying to steady yourself both physically and mentally. The butterflies in your stomach fluttered wildly at the sight of Aitana approaching you. Just as you were about to head back to Pina, Aitana reached the bar and smiled at you, her eyes twinkling under the club lights.

"Hey," she greeted, her voice smooth and warm, sending a shiver down your spine. "Having fun tonight?"

You nodded, smiling brightly, trying to appear as calm as possible despite the rapid pounding of your heart. You really concentrated on not slurring or stuttering your words. "Yeah, it’s been amazing. It’s not every day we get to celebrate a win like this. Your goal was absolutely stunning."

Aitana’s smile widened, and she looked genuinely pleased. "Thank you. Your goal was also amazing."

Your cheeks flushed, and you could feel the heat rising. "Thanks, Tana."

She laughed softly, the sound like music to your ears.

Before you could respond, you noticed Pina waving you over from the dance floor, clearly eager for her drink. You turned back to Aitana, your mind racing for something else to say, something to keep her here a little longer.

"Hey, do you want to join us?" The words tumbled out of your mouth before you could stop them. "We’re having a little dance-off. It’s pretty hilarious."

Aitana looked over to where your friends were laughing and dancing wildly. She seemed to hesitate for a moment, then shrugged with a smile. "As much fun as that sounds, I promised Keira I would bring her a drink and start teaching her a couple of Catalan phrases."

You tried not to look too disappointed, but Aitana noticed the slight frown on your face after the words left her mouth. She didn't want to see you sad, so she turned towards the bar to order, which you took as your cue to leave. Pina saw you and reached out and grabbed her drink, taking a big gulp. "Finally! What took you so long?"

"Sorry, got caught up talking," you replied, glancing at Aitana, who was now grabbing her drinks from the bartender.

Pina raised an eyebrow at you but didn’t press further. Instead, she dragged you back onto the dance floor, and soon you were lost in the music and laughter once more.

~~~

As the night went on, the drinks continued to flow, and you found yourself getting increasingly tipsy. You tried to focus on having fun with your friends, but every time you looked at Aitana, your heart skipped a beat, and your thoughts became a jumbled mess.

Eventually, you found yourself sitting on a couch, feeling the effects of the alcohol more intensely. Aitana somehow ended up beside you, laughing at something Ingrid had said, and you couldn’t help but stare at her, the words you had been holding back for so long threatening to spill out.

Before you could stop yourself, you leaned closer to Aitana, your voice barely above a whisper. "Aitana, I need to tell you something."

She turned to you, her expression curious and slightly concerned. "What is it?"

Before you could say anything else, the trophy entered the room and the music was turned down so a couple people could make a speech.

"Group picture everyone, vamos vamos," you heard Alexia shout so all your teammates could hear her.

"What were you gonna say?" Aitana asked as she turned to you.

"It's nothing important, i'll tell you later."

~~~

It was a while later before people started heading back to the hotel to get a small amount of sleep. Luckily, it was literally across the street.

"Hey, y/n," Keira said, slightly stumbling towards you, gripping onto Laura's arm. "I made some room changes. Laura is going to spend the night with me in our room, so you are going to share with Aitana. I just talked to her and she said that it’s fine and that you can walk back together."

"What about Ona?" you replied, trying to think of an excuse. You were freaking out; you couldn't spend the night in the same room as Aitana. Your heart would beat out of your chest.

"Ona is definitely going back to Lucy's room by the looks of it," Keira replied as you caught sight of Lucy pinning Ona against the wall and making out with her neck in a dark corner.

"I'm trying to help you out here. She definitely likes you back."

"Shh, someone will hear you, and she does not like me back."

Keira just gave you a sly wink and nudged Laura, who gave you a thumbs-up before they both staggered off, leaving you standing there, heart racing, and stomach in knots. You looked over at Aitana, who was chatting with a few of your teammates near the door. She caught your eye and smiled, motioning for you to join them.

Taking a deep breath, you walked over, trying to calm your nerves. You could feel the alcohol buzzing through your veins, making you slightly unsteady. When you reached them, Aitana turned her attention fully to you.

"Ready to head back?" she asked, her voice soft and inviting.

You nodded, trying to keep your cool. "Yeah, let's go."

The walk across the street to the hotel was short, but it felt like an eternity. Your mind was racing with all the things you wanted to say but knew you shouldn't. Aitana walked beside you, her presence both comforting and overwhelming.

Once inside the hotel, you took the elevator up to the floor the team was staying on. When the doors opened, you stepped out and followed Aitana to her room. She unlocked the door and held it open for you.

"Make yourself at home. I have been sleeping on the bed by the bathroom, but we can switch if you would like," she said with a smile as you walked in.

"No, no, I'll take the bed by the window. I like that one better anyway."

You glanced around the room, trying to distract yourself from the fact that you were alone with Aitana. The room was cozy, with two beds neatly made and a small sitting area by the window. You sat down on Ona's bed, trying to steady your breathing.

Aitana disappeared into the bathroom for a moment, giving you a chance to collect yourself. When she returned, she had changed into more comfortable clothes – a pair of shorts and a loose t-shirt – and she looked even more beautiful than before. You felt your heart skip a beat. You don't think you had ever felt like this about someone in your life. Even when you were dating your ex, Georgia Stanway, you loved her, but never felt this strongly.

"So, what were you going to tell me earlier?" she asked, sitting down on the bed across from you.

You hesitated, the words caught in your throat. The alcohol had given you the courage to start this conversation, but now that you were here, you felt vulnerable and exposed. You took a deep breath, deciding that it was now or never.

"Aitana," you began, your voice shaky. "I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now. And maybe it's the alcohol talking, but I can't keep it to myself any longer."

She looked at you with concern and curiosity, urging you to continue.

"I have feelings for you," you blurted out, feeling your cheeks heat up. "I've had a crush on you for over a year, and I've tried so hard to get over it, but I can't. You're always on my mind, and I just... I needed you to know."

There was a long silence, and you could feel your heart pounding in your chest. Aitana's expression was unreadable, and you started to panic, thinking you had made a huge mistake.

But then she reached out and took your hand, her touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. "I had no idea," she said softly. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

You shrugged, feeling a lump in your throat. "I was scared. I didn't want to ruin our friendship or make things awkward. And I didn't think you liked girls, so I thought it was hopeless."

Aitana's eyes softened, and she gave your hand a gentle squeeze. "You're right, I haven't been very open about my personal life. But the truth is, I do like girls. And I've liked you for a while too. I just didn't know how to tell you."

Your eyes widened in surprise and relief. "Really?"

She nodded, a shy smile playing on her lips. "Really. I guess we both were too scared to say anything."

You let out a laugh, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. "I can't believe it. This feels like a dream."

Aitana's smile grew, and she leaned in closer, her face inches from yours. "Well, it's not a dream. It's real."

Before you could say anything else, she closed the distance between you, pressing her lips to yours in a gentle, tentative kiss. The world seemed to melt away as you kissed her back, all the fear and uncertainty dissolving into a feeling of pure happiness.

When you finally pulled away, both of you were breathless, and Aitana's eyes were shining with emotion. "I'm glad you told me," she whispered. "I've been waiting for this moment for a long time."

"Me too."

That night, as you fell asleep with Aitana's smaller frame wrapped in your arms and her head on your chest, you had never felt more at peace. You drifted off to sleep, planning on taking her on a magical first date after the international break.

[formulawolff]

i. alkaline - t.w.

pairing: female driver! x toto wolff

word count: 2.7k

warnings: cursing, significant age-gap, power imbalances, slow burn, eventual smut, inappropriate work relationships, mentions of infidelity, drug/alcohol use, use of common fic tropes

synopsis: as the first american female driver for formula one, you are thrust into the competitive world of racing. when you are approached by a team principal willing to make a deal, you presented with the opportunity of a lifetime.

author's note: this is my first f1 related fic, so i may have made some errors in terminology. the title is based on the song alkaline by sleep token. i recommend listening while reading! please, please, please let me know if you like the fic! i plan on making this my first f1 series :')

racing was never in the cards. 

well, racing a nearly 1,800 pound car was never in the cards. 

especially at speeds reaching two hundred miles an hour. 

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

yet, here you were, shaking james’ hand, beaming as the cameras flashed. there were a flurry of voices, all of them nearly trembling with excitement, relief, and well, hope. if you were able to accomplish eighth place today, what did that mean for the future of williams racing? 

would williams be a sizable contender for the 2025 constructors’ championship? would they be able to squash the disbelief? the doubts? hell, if you kept this up, there was a chance that you could get williams into the top ten of the 2024 championship. 

were you what they had been missing for so long? 

were you the key to their future success?

“great job,” james’ voice is nearly hoarse, more than likely from all of the celebration, “you wouldn’t believe what they’re saying about you.” 

“probably nothing great,” you scoff, rolling your eyes slightly, “i’m sure that everyone is claiming i didn’t deserve it.” 

“quite the contrary,” a chuckle bubbles up from his throat, “they all adore you.” 

“was it because i gave the camera the finger?” 

“no,” there is a slight twinkle in his eyes, quite the contrary from what you were used to, “they love you because you’re you. there is no one in this sport who is quite like you.

there’s an authenticity that cannot be replaced. it’s obvious you have a true passion for racing. it shows on the track. good job, today.” 

heat flourished into your cheeks, tears welling up at james’ words. after years of being ridiculed by team principals, attacked by fans, and bashed by the media, praise was something to be cherished. it was always welcomed warmly, your heart swelling as james brought you in for a sweaty embrace. 

“thank you, james,” the words are slightly muffled as he squeezes you gently, “you know how much that means to me. thank you for believing in me.”

“of course,” james murmurs, rubbing your back ever so slightly, “great job, american girl. you deserve this. go do some interviews, flash that beautiful grin of yours, and then get some rest. you need it.”

“no partying?” you arch your brow, “i think i deserve a drink or two.”

“maybe a little bit,” another chuckle rings out, “i just don’t want to see any press about it in the morning. that’s the last thing we need after our victory today.”

“right, right,” you nod your head, saluting the principal, “aye, aye captain.”

“it’s principal,” james shoots you a wink before turning to several engineers, the group getting swept away into the chaos. 

no matter how well the team did, there was always chaos after a race. it was typical, routine even. there was always the pit crew cleaning up, shouting to one another as the fans trickled out of the stands. engineers milled about, tablets in hand, murmuring to one another, pointing out aspects of the car that needed improvement. there was always some piece of the car that could be adjusted, a slight tweak or advancement. it could make the car faster, or it could only lead to inevitable disaster. 

exhaling, you stroll out of the paddock, the dread of facing the press weighing down every step. 

you could turn around, and hide in the paddock. 

however, this was part of being a driver. simply a requirement of the job. press was an essential aspect of formula one. how else would the world know how you felt after that race? how else would information about driver contracts, car modifications, disqualifications be shared?

how else would the world have known about the first american female formula in formula one?  

you had to at least thank the press for that. 

even if it was shared before your official announcement that you were joining williams racing for the 2023 racing season. 

“there she is!” a voice calls out, light and airy. 

the corners of your lips tug into a smile as you see daniel ricciardo jogging towards you. before you know it, his arms are wrapping around your frame, holding you tight. he’s sweaty, per usual, but you accept the gesture, suppressing a giggle as he sways you back and forth. 

“i knew you could do it! i knew you could do it!”

“don’t puncture her lungs, please,” another voice chimes in, “i would like to keep her around, you know.”

daniel releases you promptly, placing a swift peck on your cheek, “no need to fret alex. i’m not that mighty.”

“i’m more worried about contracting any diseases from the land down under,” scrunching your nose, you wave your fingers at daniel, earning yet another laugh from the australian. 

“the only disease you’d contract are my insanely good looks.”

“here we go again,” alex rolls his eyes, “are we ready to face the press or what?”

“i think so,” daniel shrugs, “go ahead, alex. we’ll follow you.”

alex shoots you an inquiring glance, but begins to walk in the direction of the conference room. once he was a reasonable distance away, daniel clears his throat. 

“someone seemed a little jealous.”

“i wouldn’t say jealous,” you can’t help but defend alex, “he’s probably a little bitter.”

“fifteenth place is nowhere as good as eighth,” daniel points out, the notes in his tone solemn, “he’s been there a few years and seen subpar results. you came in last year and have pretty damn good ones. i’m sure he can’t help but feel a little bit of envy.” 

“maybe he just had a bad race.”

“you say that every–” daniel begins, but he’s swiftly cut off as you pull open the door to the conference room. 

all around, cameras flash, reporters chirp out questions, and phones are immediately pointed in your direction. sucking in a deep breath, you settle on the couch next to daniel, max verstappen across from you. he shoots you a thumbs up, complemented with a wide smile. alex was on your right, fiddling a loose thread. 

confusion consumes you momentarily once you realize that max was the only one from the podium to remain in the conference room. checo and carlos were not present. so why was he still here? 

daniel passes you the mic, placing it on your lap. a shit-eating grin plasters his face, and you grimace. of course he was going to make you speak first. hesitantly, you pick up the mic, clearing your throat. 

“hello, everyone. any questions?”

immediately a reporter butts in, “how does it feel to not only be one of the only women competing in formula one, but the first american woman to place in a race?”

your hand tingles as you hold up the mic, trembling slightly. public speaking was never your forte. fuck you, daniel. 

“w-well,” you curse yourself for stuttering, “i take a lot of pride in the way i compete, especially as such a trailblazer for women who love the sport. i’m aware that there is a lot of unrest and outcry concerning my gender and how i’m not ‘supposed’ to be competing with the men–”

“i think she’s a worthy opponent,” max’s voice interjects, “she competes at the same intensity as we do, if not more. she is going to be standing next to me on a podium in a matter of weeks. i’ve never met someone so driven to win or passionate about the sport. 

we pay no attention to her gender. it doesn’t affect us. we pay attention to her character. i do not want to speak for her, but i am sure she would appreciate it if you all refrained from the gender based questions. ask her about the race.”

as he finishes speaking, his eyes drift back to you, sparkling ever so slightly. his cheeks were tinged a pink hue from the passionate sentiment, and you couldn’t help but just sit there, frozen with disbelief. 

max verstappen, three time world champion, one of the best drivers to ever step foot on a formula one track, publicly praised you. in a room full of journalists, no less. 

sure, you were friendly with max. since there were only twenty drivers, most of you were close, on and off the grid. you had exchanged numerous conversations with max over the last year, but you were still a little intimidated by the dutch driver. 

of course, who wouldn’t be? he was a dominant force on the track, winning nineteen of the twenty-two races last season. 

so yeah, when he just did nothing but send you the uttermost praise in a room bustling with the press, you were going to a little starstruck.

“do you have any additional remarks to maxs’ comments?” a reporter snaps you out of your trance, “you appear to be a little off-put by what he just said.”

blinking, you bring the mic to your lips, “no, i actually appreciate what he said. maybe that means you guys will finally take me seriously.”

“are you under the impression that formula one does not take you seriously?”

as the reporter baits you to respond, a twinge of frustration brews in your stomach, churning it into a knot. sucking in a sharp breath, you focus your attention to the reporter. 

“no, that is not what i said. it is the simple fact that i have been working my ass off this last year to be a competitive racer. i’ve worked tirelessly with williams racing to place. i’ve been trying to earn points for my team because i believe in my team and i want us to succeed. yet nearly every day i wake up, someone on social media posts some bullshit or bashes me for competing. 

i’ve been making a name for myself, and look where it has gotten me. you all are more concerned about my gender than the race i just had. i think it’s a bit frivolous to be more invested in my gender than my racing. so yeah, when the three time world champion says something good about me, i would hope that you guys listen to it.”

there’s a few gasps from a few reporters, and you can’t help but notice all of the beady red lights on the cameras. of course that was all recorded. of course it was going to be blasted all over social media these next couple of days. 

so much for good press. 

setting down the mic, you lean over to daniel. the words are low enough so that only he can hear, “i’m done here.”

“i don’t blame you,” the aussie plucks the mic out of your hands, “get out of here. cool down. i’m sorry about that prick.”

“don’t worry about it,” you mutter, cheeks burning hot with sheer anger, “i’m leaving before i cuss them all out.”

“atta girl,” daniel winks, “i’d like to see that, though.”

“not now,” you bite your lip, “i need to bite my tongue.”

as you get up, max’s gaze is full of sympathy. alex’s mouths, i’m so sorry, disappointment painting his features. walking across the stage, daniel’s words drown in your ears. 

balling your fists together, the tingly sensation resides as you march towards your motorhome. tears blur your vision, strings of curses filling the air as you walk. after that little incident in the press room, james was not going to be happy. of course, after everything you accomplished today, it was diminished somehow. 

by an asshole reporter, at that. 

flinging open the door to the motorhome, you resist the urge to just scream. it would not help much, but god would it be cathartic. however, there were more important things to be addressed. you needed to decompress and settle down. 

as much as you wanted to celebrate with a few drinks, a shower, some comfy clothes, and your bed were more appealing. 

maybe a glass of wine in bed wouldn’t hurt. 

as you unzip your fire suit, a knock at the door disturbs the silence. 

shit. just as you were finally getting settled. 

groaning, you spin on your heel, making your way to the door. 

“daniel, i swear to fucking god. i don’t want to talk right now–”

however, it was not daniel standing at the entrance of your motorhome. 

before you was torger wolff, also known as toto wolff, team principal of mercedes-amg petronas. 

donning a white team button-up, the sleeves were rolled to his elbows, showcasing his muscular build. inky black slacks were on his lower half, making him appear taller than he already was. fluffy brunette hair stood up on nearly all ends, messy from the stress and chaos of the race.

however, there was no denying he was handsome. with sharp, angular features, and wrinkles scoured in his face over the years, it gave him a powerful yet stoic aura. 

like his name suggested, he was like a wolf, poised and eager to pounce.

yet, you were more focused on his eyes. a brilliant, warm, mocha-hued gaze framed by thick, dark lashes. and they were peering right at you, taking in the sight of you in your half-zipped fire suit, a black long sleeve underneath. 

your eyes widen, a hand covering your mouth. sheer embarrassment courses through you, heat flooding your cheeks, trickling down your neck, “i – oh my god. um, oh my god, i am so fucking sorry.”

clearing his throat, he arches a brow, “did i come at a bad time?”

“no,” you shake your head, perhaps a little quickly, “no, no, no. please, come in. how rude of me.”

there is no readable expression across the austrian’s features, his lips pucking ever so slightly, “it won’t be long, i promise.”

swallowing a lump in your throat, you step back, inviting the principal in to the motorhome. you lead him to the kitchen, gesturing to a barstool, “you can sit here if you’d like.”

he glances at the stool, yet does not sit. your brows furrow as he remains standing. leaning against a counter, you fold your arms across your chest. 

“is there a reason you stopped by?”

“as you know,” toto begins, “lewis is leaving mercedes after the 2024 season. he will be joining ferrari in 2025. to put it simply, i am on the hunt for my second driver.”

your lips purse, “i’m not sure why you came to me. you would have better luck with carlos. he’s looking for a team. i made a verbal commitment to james. i’ll be staying with williams through 2026.”

“is that so?” toto inquires, taking a step towards you, “and why are you choosing to stay with a team that limits your potential?”

the question takes you aback, “i’m not sure you what mean.”

rolling his eyes, he tuts, “williams racing is nowhere as near as competitive of a team as ferrari, redbull, mclaren, or mercedes. for years they’ve been piddling around, finishing at the bottom of the championship. yes, their drivers are talented, but they are not given opportunities to thrive.”

his comment sends another wave of anger coursing through you, your fists balling at your sides, “you have no idea what you’re talking about–”

“actually, i do. i’ve been around a long time. i’ve seen a lot more than you ever have. james is a great team principal, but you are not going to compete if you stay at williams. eventually, you’ll be like alex. you’ll finish with mediocre results. you’ll lose faith in the team who you once cherished so deeply. you’ll be ridiculed even more by the world of formula one, even more so than you already are.”

gritting your teeth, you take a step forward, “i think it’s time for you to leave.”

“what?” toto cocks his head, “did i say something you didn’t want to hear, little dove? did i strike a chord?”

“i think you’re just projecting,” you maintain your composure as the principal scoffs, “that’s exactly what happened to lewis, and you’re afraid it’s going to happen to george.”

“you’re a smart girl,” it takes a moment for you to realize how close the two of you had suddenly gotten.

he was in very close proximity now, only a few inches apart, looking down at you with a wickedly smug grin, “and i know that you’re very aware that formula one is a business. i have to maintain the mercedes reputation and acquire a driver who will bring us home podiums.” 

“i think you’ll have that luck with carlos,” breaking away, your gaze settles on the door of the motorhome. 

fingers grasp your chin, tilting your head upwards. 

“but i want you to drive for mercedes. i want to make you a world champion.”

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆

please let me know if you would like to be tagged! thank you for reading! <3

[ask-shane]

in a college au, what would shane major in?

[bembwashere]

Rattmann, man me a rat

--- --- ---

If you can't tell I am obsessed with the messy rattmann style. I'm gonna say it. I think Mr. Doug Rattmann here is an underrated character and there ought to be more art of him.

Anywho, something for once that isn't Wheatley related woah. I rarely draw rattmann myself but I should do it more. I WAS going to make a speedpaint vid with this BUT windows gamebar crapped itself and corrupted the video file afterwards 😔 Hope you enjoy this little piece of mine though!

[wordsvomit101]

Just some thoughts on Lucifer's chats

Credits to @shyanimeboi and their friend for sharing, cause this just gives me a newer perspective on Lucifer.

He got me confused at first because why saying the obvious, every human has a name but then he started with Adam, Eve, and Solomon

It gives a lot more nuance to him and other immortal and long-living characters. It makes him so not human but also human in a way. For me, as a normal person, I can barely remember the names of the people I meet every day, but if they stay long enough I can remember them or I will know them through someone I have a closer relationship with, who relates to those I don't have a strong connection with in some way, it's easier. Lucifer in this aspect is like a human to me, he is a dude who lives life slower and longer, it makes sense why he and most other characters addressed MC as "descendant of Solomon" because will MC stay long enough for their name to be embedded into these immortals creatures like how Solomon, Adam, and Eve did or just another fleeting memory.

The "Are you not greedy?" got me thinking for a minute cause what does he mean by that but then, I think it could be an honor thing. It is normal for people to be excited to have someone to memorize their name, like wouldn't you be happy if your favorite celebrity knew your name, your existence? You would, it is something to be greedy for and to have pride in. While his second question also makes sense, because if you're scared of someone, you would rather them never know of your existence, their ignorance of you is your bliss and peace.

And that is some philosophy Lucifer is dropping on my dumb ass, BUT, it sounds to me like he meant, the kings and the seraphim are the beings that reflect on the concept that some truths or pieces of knowledge are not learned through conventional means but are instead a natural part of our awareness and existence. This lowkey sounds so cool and so true to them being the embodiment of inherence factors that everyone has, they will have by just the mere act of becoming conscious.

And I really like that we have this route with Lucifer, getting to know each other is the starting point of every connection, it sounds so easy but probably one of the hardest stages in every relationship. Since it is the starting point, everything could go wrong or it could go great, it is unclear what to do or say and it takes time.

And I really like Lucifer in this chat, I like the slow burn of this and I think the devs did him so well, they cooked in this.

[chocolate-milk-enthusiast]

social's as isagi's girlfriend

-liked by megubachi, chigiwho and 89.2k others

yourusername: the way this mf's date "idea" was also him playing soccer and me js cheering him on. anw i enjoyed it

tagged: isaichii

mikka.kaiser: for the 100th time it's football not soccer ↳yourusername: my account my post i do what i want ↳user1: pop off queen ↳mikka.kaiser: say soccer once more and your boyfriend's deadmeat ↳yourusername: he's better than you anw cry ab it ↳isaichii: why are you in my gf's comments anw ↳mikka.kaiser: my account my comment i do what i want

megubachi: you're everything and he's js ken ↳yourusername: ily bachi come over we'll do a sleepover and paint eachother's nails ↳megubachi: omw rn queen ↳isaichii: no tf not on my watch you can paint my nails ↳yourusername: i tried to but apprently mr football bigshot has an image to keep up ↳isaichii: and i do ↳user2: love the way they give us sm drama

chihiwho: omg you used the hair routine i told you to use!! ↳yourusername: cant believe you gatekept that for so long ↳chigiwho: would have gatekept it for longer but your dumbass annoyed me so much ↳yourusername: no shame in admitting that you love me ↳chigiwho: sigh

user4: leave the ball man for me i can treat you better trust

-liked by yourusername, megubachi and 102.4k others

isaichii: our dates aren't only on the field (wasn't even a date bachira was thirdwheeling us). i treat my girl js fine

yourusername: bachira is my child !! stop slandering him !! ↳megubachi: fr like your giving my daddy issues pt.2 out here ↳isaichii: since when did we adopt this thing ↳yourusername: since forever and he isn't a thing >:( ↳megubachi: #cancelisagiyoichi ↳rin.itoshi: #cancelisagiyoichi ↳reo.miikage: #cancelisagiyoichi ↳mikka.kaiser: #cancelisagiyoichi ↳yourusername: #cancelisagiyoichi ↳isaichii: my gf aswell? wow. zucky better be watching this.

user5: the way even rin commented js bc it was something related to hating on isagi ↳user6: like that man barely uses social media

user7: not his gf joining on the hate bandwagon ↳isaichii: sometimes it do be your girlfriend ↳user7: OMG HE REPLIED?? IM LIKE UR BIGGEST FAN ILY

user8: ugh not isagi's girlfriend hating on him too! i could treat him so much more better.. ↳user9: girl bffr he ain't gonna choose you ↳user8: why not? he's girlfriend's legit a slut lmao ↳bastard.munchen: that's the amount of copium kaiser smokes bfr thinking he can beat isagi. ↳yourusername: HAHAHA I RAISED U WELL ↳mikka.kaiser: oh fuck off ↳isaichii: admin ily

-liked by yourusername, shitdo.ryu and 106.8k others

isaichii: girlfriend appreciation post

yourusername: did i mention ily? ↳isaichii: couple of times, could be said more though ↳yourusername: ily ↳mikka.kaiser: i'm sick. ↳yourusername: go be a hater somewhere else !!

user11: oh to be be posted by isagi yoichi ↳user12: nah, it's more like oh to be able to post y/n ↳yourusername: ily ↳user12: ilyt girlie

yourusername: my man y'all ↳isaichii: all yours now come back to bed i miss you ↳yourusername: omw 🏃‍♀️💨

megubachi: my parents guys ↳isaichii: are we still doing this? ↳yourusername: yes ↳megubachi: yes ↳isaichii: sigh

kuniisuke: y'all are cute or wtvr but get the fuck off my feed ↳yourusername: don't be salty !! ↳kuniisuke: i'm not, i just like being single without you two being all gross ↳isaichii: we aren't gross, we just show love to eachother ↳kuniisuke: do that away from me pls

user13: if they break up, i won't believe in love ↳isaichii: seems like your believing in love for enternity ↳user14: they are the perfect couple, your honor

user15: she's sauurrr pretty, idk how some dude who kicks balls managed to pull her ↳isaichii: ikr!!

js something i came up with impulsively, the other fics i was writing were overwhelming so this is the end result i think i like how it came out. i feel like i should make a series for other characters as well but idk

[spooky-pop]

I am sketching out something in such a lazy way but it's something I can't stop thinking about

Related to Broppy being parents, I imagine a scenario where Branch and Poppy visit Bridget right after Ivy is born to let her meet the baby, and she let's Bridget hold her and it's like she's just holding a teeny tiny bug

so tiny so little. I need the visual of that. So I'm making it.

[mlmarint]

so here’s my thoughts about the “daddy issues” thing with the whole anti tommy shit

you guys are such fucking hypocrites

i would be totally on board with someone bringing that it’s not okay to sexualize someone’s trauma if that was the case. but guess whaaaaaaat???? THATS NOT THE CASE. and it’s not “terrible dialogue” either, there’s so many scenes with terrible dialogue in this show, but some of you should really stop and ask yourselfs WHY you didn’t like this one.

if eddie was the one to make a comment like that some of you’d be OVER THE MOON. i’ve NEVER seen ANYONE in this fandom talk about how a LOT of the buddie explicit fanfics have a daddy kink on it. and before any more comments, i REALLY HATE buddie fics with daddy kink because it always reminds me of christopher and do NOT want to think about christopher in that moment.

“that’s not the problem. the problem is that once again buck it’s with someone who doesn’t care about his trauma” oh grow the fuck up.

tommy LITERALLY decided to not date buck because he thought buck wasn’t ready for it, he gave buck his space, he at first didn’t want to go to maddie and chimney wedding with buck because he thought buck was acting on impulse and wanted him to take his time to be okay with who he is, and after he was sure he tried his best to be on time to his date.

and also!!!! buck is a little “freak” in bed guys, he was a literal sex addict in season 1. every now and then the show reminds us this (like the ring cutter scene), also this is the second buck’s relationship with someone who’s like older than him. i wouldn’t be surprised if buck has a canon daddy kink because GUESS WHAAAAAT some people who have daddy issues??? THEY HAVE DADDY KINKS!!!!!

but you guys wanna know what i truly think?

i think that some of you (these tommy antis) are only here for buddie. you’re not here for the show, you’re here for buck and eddie. you’re not here for all these amazing characters!!! you’re not here for the fact that buck being a bisexual man discovering that side of him in his 30s its one of the most important things that happened in this show when we’re talking about lgbt+ characters and the importance of having something like that to be on media.

you’re not here for bi buck, you’re only here if this means that eddie will be with him. you’ll won’t be here if they decide to give a eddie queer discover story non related to buck on season 8 (and i truly think we’re going that way).

you only liked buck and tommy when you could sexualize two man kissing.

if you want to talk about something that is not okay that tommy did why don’t you rewatch the older episodes he’s in? he wasn’t a nice person back then and honestly i would like for them to bring that up!!! for them to show how a person can change and grow out of their prejudice and realize that they don’t need to be an ass and be okay with who they truly are. in fact why don’t we talk about how they hinted the fact that tommy didn’t like who he was when he was working with gerard? that he doesn’t like gerard and that he was a toxic person and that tommy grow up with a racist, homophobic and sexist dad???? that’s why he wasn’t a nice person back than but he’s different now and he’s a proud gay man and that once again that’s a nice thing to have on media because it shows how it’s NEVER too late to come in terms with who you are and change the way your are for better????

tommy isn’t perfect (and no one that he hurt before seems to actually care about it cause he did truly changed), but that doesn’t mean you need to cancel the guy FOR ONE SINGLE comment!!!! part of the 911 team made fun of buck for being sexually assaulted by his therapist but no one canceled them for it, did they?

honestly i am so fucking tired with fandoms in general.

at this point i hope we don’t get buddie being canon FOR A LONG TIME cause i want you guys to suffer with tommy and buck being in a happy relationship.

just remember: eddies it’s not canonical queer yet, there’s hints of it and they probably are going on that road with the whole thing they’re saying on interviews, BUT buck IS BISEXUAL and HE IS dating TOMMY you like it or not and it’s by far the most healthy relationship he EVER had in this show, can’t you be happy for him????

you can be a buddie shipper and still enjoy bucktommy because what we should truly want more than anything it’s buck and eddie to be happy with who they are.

and I SAY ALL THIS BEING A BUDDIE SHIPPER FOR YEARS