#this is the 3rd time im trying to write and post this because every time there was a problem with the files. god.

[cryptile]

Thank you @frenziedworship for commissioning me to draw this gorgeous Raphaella!

It was an absolute pleasure working on this drawing, especially rendering all the little feathers (i made sure to put extra effort into those), which is why right under the cut you'll find close-ups of all the fun render-y bits :3

[makeit-tothemoon]

Disclaimer : English is my 3rd language. Be kind.

I'm sorry for tagging so much but im desperate for help. Please pardon me.

During my time in this fandom i have always read through every vent post, every rant post by every author or artist during their times of distress. I am a writer but not an author or an artist. I have no following. But if you see this please read.

Please understand this comes from a kind place and in no shape or form am i intentionally trying to condemn or shame anyone. I dont know if this will reach anyones feed but i have been seeing alot of people say that it is not your fav authors or fan accounts responsibility to speak up about every conflict. I understand that. Completely i do. But still read this i implore of you.

As someone whose ancestors have been colonised, enslaved, attempted to be ethnically cleansed, crippled and forced under occupation until 1971, i just want to say - although it takes alot of mental strength to interect with upsetting content from conflcited regions such as Gaza and Iran and Syria - your words, no matter how small your platform is can help.

Since there have been posts saying its okay not to speak up (and im not shaming that i promise im trying to be respectful and understanding to the best of my abilities during this upsetting times) - i wanted to write to you to encourage only. To say something. People from Gaza have only this hope - their pain is heard and seen and documented.

I urge you to help out. Because even though comparitively this fandom is small but spreading their cries to even a single person is helpful during these times where propaganda against the gazans are so rampant.

1. Even a single post about ur solidarity with the palestinians is HELPFUL.

2. Info graphics (ik they've garnered a bad reputation among some people recently) can HELP.

3. Linking donation links by finding 20 mins of your life to search credible links in your bio is HELPFUL

4. Interacting with content from Gaza is HELPFUL.

5. Speaking up even once is HELPFUL.

Every 15 minutes a child dies in Gaza. It is a privilege for us to be able to close our phones and get away. People in Gaza do not have that. I URGE you to post at least once in solidarity and spread news.

Fadom is a safe space for many. I UNDERSTAND that many might not want to bring the real world into it, many might not want to take away that comfort. I understand. All im trying to do is motivate you to post at least once. Gazans themselves have urged us to help them win this information and proganda war that is going on against them. The crimes happening against them is not a war to win, it is simple genocide and ethinic cleansing. This is not a highly complicated situation. This is oppressor vs the oppressed.

We've all become so desentized to these words and to all the death toll numbers we forget how real they are. It is uncomfortable and sad but i urge you to let yourself understand the depth of these words and these numbers we're saying because palestinians are being brutalised as we speak.

Be brave. Be brave like the characters we adore. Please help.

I have always loved this fandom as a queer, person of colour living in a third world country. If you are among the people who are reluctant to speak up because palestine does not support queer rights i have this to say to you -

My country does not support lgbtq rights but im still here and so many queer people are here. WE ARE HERE. AND WE LOVE OUR COUNTRY. Because countries are not their governments. Country is the roots of the trees we plant, it is the food we eat, the family we embrace and the culture that we celebrate. Queer people of colour do not deserved to be left alone in times of crisis.

Palestinians do not have human rights.

They have had their HUMAN RIGHTS attacked for years since 1948. And currently they have no human rights at all. That is almost 75 years of the lack of basic rights.

Queer Palestinians exist. I used to know them. Some from this fandom. They're gone now. My friends are gone.

They didn't get the chance to see a future where their country acknowledged queer rights. They were too busy fighting for their basic human ones.

I wouldn't deserve to be left alone in a genocide.

They didnt either.

I urge you to say something. I urge you to be with the right side of history not just as people but also a fandom. So after many decades we can tell children and the youths, we were there in times of crisis and pain when a whole ethinicity was being wiped.

Because as a fandom we've always represented and celebrated our people of colour. We have stood by our marginalised groups. Our favourite characters were celebrated as people of colour.

And remember Jews are NOT doing this crime. Zionist settlers of Israel are. This is NOT a religious conflict. This is Israel genociding the Palestinian people.

To everyone who read to the end, if anyone has read this that is, thank you.

Free Palestine.

[franticfanficloremakers]

How much did you pay for the tumblr blaze’s reach?? It has been legitimately the only ad I’ve seen on the site and it’s after every 3rd post 💀💀

wait its the only ad youve seen? ill answer your question in a moment but im... a bit stupefied by knowing THAT detail specifically. as for how much i paid for it, well time to spill the beans i guess: i have blazed this SPECIFIC post (but i blazed other posts on this blog earlier this month) for $150. and thats only from THIS month. i have blazed this other times and i cant give an exact number, but honestly i can say in total i paid MORE than $200 on that post in general. now why would i do that? because i love seeing some people make jokes about it, getting REALLY pissed off from seeing it OVER AND OVER AGAIN, like just that knowledge is SO FUCKING HILARIOUS TO ME. the thing is about that too is THE PEOPLE TOOK THE BAIT! they took the bait, literally reblogging how much they hate it, how much its complete DOGSHIT and probably thinking about how i should be a cow on a trash farm like that one german dude on twitter said to edmund mcmillen. but theres also the polar opposite, the people who find it very funny, people who oddly enjoy it, like genuinely enjoy it. or people who just saw the blaze and think its based. i like that, too, honestly. i like this polar opposite dynamic with the post and how people see it over and over. its funny, at least to me. it gives me genuine enjoyment, seeing how much people both genuinely seem to like it bc funny, and how much people hate it. oh and yes i can afford this, so you all are probably stuck with this for a GOOD LONG WHILE, because i feel like i practically live in a factory job that pays me well enough.

oh and also, i see a lot of people dont notice what that post is referencing. originally referencing, i mean. people also dont seem to get the whole mordetwi thing so im just going to explain that, too: so i mentioned this horribly made mordetwi fanart made YEARS ago on deviantart with literally the same exact lyrics and a VERY similar background to the art my good friend harvey made. this is the art it was referencing:

so yeah, i mentioned that artwork to my friend harvey who was trying to come up with something for me to post on this tumblr to specifically make jokes about our cursed, horribly written at first crackfic that turned serious at some point (which to be fair, during this time i wasnt writing much but i got into it a bit later, came up with a lot of plot and helped the best i could with consistency on frantic fanfic writing, but enough of THOSE details!) and got genuinely better, storywise. i made that joke about the fucking ship we put in there, YOU CAN GUESS FUCKING WHAT I DONT THINK I NEED TO SPELL IT OUT. so i made a joke about him making parody art of that and the dude really did it. i was so shocked, astounded, and overjoyed with this POWER I HAAAVE that i blazed it and successfully knew i got people to go through some serious mental anguish, cringe, and even a small bit of trauma from viewing that. but also some people who genuinely enjoyed it, which KUDOS TO YOU PEOPLE YOURE GREAT!

but yeah no i spent too much cash on this and it probably wont stop anytime soon, SUCKS TO SUCK, GUYS!

[astraystayyh]

Eek more questions hehe I really like this new set

Really curious for #1, #7, #8, #10, #13, #21, #24, #28, #34, and #35!!

These were really good questions hehe

-💫

What inspired you to start writing fanfiction?

it was i think my 3rd month of being a stay? and I really loved reading ff on here even tho I had no idea how this app worked LMAO I've already told her but @rachalixie's hurt/comfort drabbles were my fav thing to read, she was one the first ppl I followed on here, and so, tmi, I was feeling so anxious and I wrote a channie helping u through an anxiety attack drabble (that I never posted AJSNJSB) and I was like hold on! this is fun! i can write what I want??? and post it for people to read...... like I was already writing some poems for a couple of years now but they were just for me yk, so i got super ambitious and i posted a long ass OT8 saying ily for the first time as my first fic akssjnjb i was so nervous like actually shaking and refreshing the notif bar every two seconds, i still rem the very first two comments i got, i think that's when it hit me that people actually READ stuff I wrote.

short answer, i've always loved writing and then stayblr -mainly anny inspired me to start writing too hehe

10. What's your favorite part about the fic writing process?

wahhhh probably coming up with lines i'm proud of?? i also loveee weaving parallels into my fics and for everything to come full circle, I love the symbolic aspects of fic writing in a way, thinking of mundane things and giving them an important significance for the characters!!! someone commented underneath Orange that they cannot believe they're crying over oranges and that rlly made me giggle!! that's the point HEHEH

13. What's the most challenging aspect of writing fanfiction for you?

for me it's descriptions ;;;; especially when it comes to sceneries or clothes or omg PLACES like decor and all,, I can't envision these things in my mind so I always worry I'm not describing them well in my fics,,, also the little transition scenes where nothing MAJOR happens but that are still pivotal to the right flow of the story ;;; yeah these mess with my head the most

21. Have you ever used fanfiction as a way to explore your own emotions or personal experiences?

hiii heyyy ofc i did ZJKNJD i think a lot of authors will relate but art cannot be completely separate from the artist, every work u read of mine has a little (or big) piece of me in it, that's why it's so vulnerable for writers to share their works on this scary place because u are perceived and judged for them and u hope that someone will find solace in ur struggles or relate to ur worries,,, and this is really helping me mend back my rp with love!!!

24. What advice would you give to someone who wants to start writing fanfiction?

JUST DO IT!!!! seriously go for it, you'll 100% cringe at ur earlier works later on but u will also improve and learn and discover things about urself that u would've never known otherwise!!! be self-indulgent and write things for urself and there will be always someone who will appreciate them

34. Are there any fic writing tips or tricks you've learned along the way that you'd like to share?

im trying to think of smtg i never mentioned before mmmm.... oh I think that trying to include bits and quirks of the member u are writing about is always so fun and makes the story more enjoyable for the reader!! ofc we don't know what these idols are like irl BUT there are some aspects of their personalities that we know of (like their interests or small habits) and it's always fun to incorporate into ur story, also helps with the characterization hehe

35. What do you enjoy most about being a fic writer?

THE FEEDBACK!!!!!!!!! nothing beats the feedback for me it's literally what makes the entire thinking, writing and editing process worth it!! the feedback is what keeps me going and fuels my motivation, it is so so important for writers I can't stress this enough,,, I'm so so grateful and lucky to have such sweet readers who leave me the most THOUGHTFUL feedback, like with just one rb u could erase SEAS OF DOUBTS in the writer's mind. i always say this but the only way for me to know if my fic is good is by reading u guys' opinions,,, so yeah the feedback is my fuel ;;;;

7. How do you handle writer's block or moments of creative stagnation? 8. Do you have any rituals or habits that help you get into the zone? 28. What's the most ambitious or challenging fic you've ever written

i answered these here and here <33

[awek-s-archived]

please can you guys stop acting like bee wasn’t antiblack, or that her being rightfully angry about antisemitism means that it’s ok to be antiblack. i get it i get that she was hotheaded and emotional. i also get that she is not doing well mentally at all and that’s why she disappeared off tumblr as a result of the situation. i ALSO get that she read and re-read that post after writing it multiple times and went back and added to it and reblogged it a couple times to encourage people to also reblog it to spread it. i know this because i didn’t reblog it myself until about the 3rd time i saw it on my dash. there was ample opportunity for bee to see that her wording was messed up and if she didn’t mean it or miswrote what she meant to say, she could have removed it. whatever, that isn’t the situation at this point. the situation at this point is people know and accept that bee herself admitted she was being antiblack and apologised, but are now rallying some kind of a support group for her being like ‘we know you were antiblack and we don’t agree with that, but it’s ok because we know you didn’t mean it and we love you!’ THAT ISN’T YOUR PLACE. it’s not my place either but evidently you need someone to tell it to you like a dickhead because everyone affected has been way too fucking nice about it. like are you guys stupid? genuinely asking. because you’re starting to sound exactly like the twitter fans you keep mocking and disowning every day in your little screenshots you post on your blogs. racism sucks until it’s your friend, or your mutual, right? then it’s fine? because it’s your friend and you know them and they’re absolutely NOT racist, just in this instance, right? i’m closer to bee and laura than over half of you people on anon or throwaway blogs ever were btw ????? like im literally their friend???? or was supposed to be???? which is why i even expressed such disappointment @ laura and waited so so long for her to try and get back to me and try to tell her that it wasn’t ok to get so defensive????? to the point of her also being racist and antiblack???? but im not gonna stay silent abt it and pretend it’s not happening or defend them on main OR WORSE ON ANON LOL like not even owning what you say, to say things like ‘i know you were racist but i love you :(’ like cmon.... are you SERIOUS with this. BRO YOUR FRIEND WAS RACIST. if you’re not gonna get involved directly on main like i didn’t get til now, at the very least try and talk to them about it, like i know other mutual friends of ours have. at least BE A FRIEND not a fucking asslicker. you didnt see me asslick bee for being in the wrong. i sent her a dm at the start of the chae situation telling her to take care of herself and then supported the community she hurt on here. me distancing myself from them further after all the other shit that happened is because i personally dont feel comfortable interacting with people who were so confidently antiblack and racist on main after doubling down on the initial callout. if u get called out, you review what you said, you apologise sincerely if you were in the wrong, you move on and grow. you allow the people you hurt to process that hurt. that’s how this shit works. you guys are 3rd parties DO NOT get to sit there and go ‘it’s ok!!!! you deserve support, we know you didnt mean it!!!’ while COMPLETELY IGNORING the fact that an entireeeeeee group of black people have been hurting over this situation for DAYS.... like. i have literally seen it with my own two eyeballs because i see their posts. they are hurting!!!! you guys are literally NOT CARING!!!??? get a grip! if you’re gonna support your friend, fair, but at least acknowledge at the VERY LEAST that they literally added to the disgusting treatment black people face enough on here and off here every day. MAY I ALSO MENTION, as my friend jewel also mentioned yesterday, black jewish people exist. this situation hurt them tenfold. like what was the reason for pitting two minority communities against each other like that??? not once have i seen one of you guys say something so simple and so true and that is that ANTISEMITISM IS BAD but SO IS ANTIBLACKNESS.

[nebulaleaf]

goodbye persona 5 royal. after 121 hours (140 on my switch profile) i got 69% of thieves den achievements, 99% in the compendium, and took 910 switch screenshots (third sem having a recording block really cucked me fr.) I think I did as much as i possibly could. despite my gripes this was my most fulfilling playthrough i've ever done of P5. i have a lot of bad things to say about royal but i really did have so much fun with it. getting excited over the new moves with the grappling hook (guessing where the cutscene would be and having fun being technical with chains de hook), making more strategic personas with fusion alarms, using all that extra time p5r gives as efficiently as possible. I loved maruki's confidant even if it ended in a kind of mediocre palace. he's just a fun guy who's so naturally inserted into the story it feels like he Should've always been there (except for the end). though its a shame because of how his confidant is structured in terms of topics, you cant easily insert it into p5 (its basically just a huge foreshadowing/ general set-up for the themes of 3rd sem). akechi's though... akechi's confidant and the addition of kichioji was WONDERFUL and i'd have killed for it in vanilla. im so glad for it. its such a fun place to explore and i love all the new npcs; penguin sniper was fun to play (though i hate playing with akechi, esp because its useless to) and jazzjin's gameplay elements were REAL FUN TO MAKE BUSTED ASS TEAMMATES WITH. no more what-ifs is also... a good song. i think i might even add it to my personal faves playlist. i'll have to sit down and listen to the ost when i don't have a headache. anyway there's probably a lot more good things i can say, but my head is kind of muddled rn lol. that post-game feeling fr.

ahh, but even when it comes down to the bad, like kasumi-- groaning every time she came on screen was fun in its own way too; whether it was laughing at the hilarity of it or coming to tumblr and grumbling about it with whoever was following along with my posts that day. honestly i just wish they tried a little harder with her and we got to know *sumire* instead of kasumi a little more. reading the interview where the devs admitted to her just being a marketing ploy and how they treated her as such really is crushing. its kind of a reflection of royal as a whole in a way to me. care *was* put in; i can see the heart behind a lot of this, but it's more focused on being flashy and appealing to those who missed the first wave of p5dom; or trying to draw back in those who have already played. which... is the point of a video game definitive edition, but kind of ironic when presented against the morals p5 seems to stand for. (or tries to, anyway. corporate meddling and cultural norms... this is still a video game that needs to sell.) i know i shouldn't treat silly anime game #685 that lets you date a maid-teacher as an 'art form' but i always felt p5 had a pretty solid and profound message. so to see royal trample p5 vanilla and then dance around wearing its skin is... certainly something. i know they're technically the same game, so royal has those messages too, but they get all tied up in the new stuff that royal brings forth (and doesn't deliver on. lmao. lol) on top of the already shaky at times writing p5 came with. i guess what im just trying to say is that royal's content is good... but it's being too much. and that just makes me really, really sad. despite all that, royal still kind of rekindled my love for p5 that was already present. every new playthrough for me lets me look deeper into what i like or neat details i missed; seriously i always find something new when i come back to this game. but this was especially true in royal. i found myself noticing when the tiniest detail was changed and it was always fun to compare them, even if it devolved into a tangent. i really only am disappointed like this just because I love persona 5 as a whole *so much*. its everything to me, so i want it to be the best it can be, yknow? anyway, thanks persona 5 royal. you've been a journey in multiple ways. try as i might, i won't forget you.

[pinkandgreenarepurpleandyellow]

Re-made my pants-leg project

so long story short, it turns out that Im a genius who had forgotten that acrylic paint doesn't actually survive laundry washes, so my very best spring break attempts were tragically ruined and I was very very sad. Fortunately, I got a kick in the pants to do the redesigns that I had wanted to do for some time, so I'm taking this as a net win.

(1st pic - og design. 2nd pic - og design post-laundry incident. 3rd pic - new design.) (Notes on the ruined version: I'm torn between grief and hysterical laughter every time I look at J-Dog's mask. It's just little eyes and vague pink. He stare.)

Some close-ups and details I'm obnoxiously proud of:

I actually did the LA thing! (I could not put the little HU into the barrel because I don't have any brushes that tiny) I was a tad short on black paint and couldn't keep re-mixing the charcoal grey, so the little grey outline around the LA symbol is missing. The buildings turned out pretty ok though.

I liked the og version, so I tried to change minimal stuff here. I did however have a breakdown trying to mix the right shade of grey. You do not know true hatred until you're mixing the grey and it's just too light or too dark to blend correctly.

Patch notes: It looks a little lopsided in the picture, but the mask is actually round, the jeans just bend there cause J3T's mask is right on the knee and creasing does not help things look perfectly straight. The Butterly has more detailing (and is a tad more accurate re both where the swirls and spirals go and the newly added skull). If you look closely, the skull has tiny teeth and outlines for eye sockets and the holes at the nose area.

I spent 3 whole days on J-dog's mask once again. If y'all can't tell, I took my failures very personally, and spent far too much time trying (and even semi-succeeding) to replicate the dollar bill designs on the mask and get the fire right. Note the detailing of/around the pyramid and the tiny eye-like blob in the top triangle. I unfortunately could not write 'Hollywood Undead' under it in the green circle (again, no brushes that small), but it's a lot more detailing than last time.

This one required the most reworking tbh because of how much paint had cracked and smudged off. It probably says something about me that I'm firmly convinced I went wrong somewhere on the spacing of the eyes but can't actually tell you what. On the plus side, a lot more detailing of rust and damage sprinkled around the cross and over the bridge of the nose. The eyes have been repainted again to still have the little mesh outline in them.

Anyways I think I just enjoy suffering. I slept 5 hours and should probably be packing.

[kwxeden]

hey everyone! i’m here with eden han, photography nerd, band nerd, just a nerd loser in general... with a passion! he’s a photography major, loves to take pictures of many things including the people around him, easily inspired. chances are if you’re a friend, you’re in his dslr camera gallery. president of the photography club! he’s also a pitcher in the baseball team. what else, what else... right, he’s also a guitarist. a guy with a lot of hobbies. if he seems familiar, then shhhhhh.

here’s his profile page! bio pages are overrated (read: i did not have the time to make one) so i’ll be listing things about him under the cut. i’ll also make a plots page... one of these days! if you’re interested in plotting, please like this post and i’ll crawl my way into your ims (i also have twitter/discord upon request) ♡

was born and raised in vancouver, canada up until his high school graduation

took ap classes + summer classes so he’s able to graduate high school earlier than most students, hence he’s a young 3rd year undergrad

in middle school, he made a band with ( @kwjun​ ) called “losers who are learning to love themselves”, really hammering that losers club aesthetics! he’s trying to revive it right now with a new lineup

is the lead guitarist and main vocalist! 

had been into photography since he was elementary school. his older brother bought him a toy camera and ever since, he finds himself enamored by the idea of capturing fleeting moments into the lenses of his camera and ‘immortalizing a second’

joined a lot of photography competitions/events back then! won a few, lost a few, he’d end up in second place sometimes. he’d still sign up for them now in uni when he can

left canada and flew to kr to leave... something behind... but ironically...

love starved, touch starved, affection starved—and he throws all of that into music composition. all the songs he writes are about yearning

tries to be a good person. tries to be a good anything to everyone. sometimes he tries a little too hard

he has a fairly unhealthy view on love and relationships/friendships in that he’d be bending over backwards for people but won’t let people do the same for him because... that’s just how he is? hm. we’ll check back later

composed most of the time. calm and teasing smile, unreadable eyes—kinda hard to break him! even if someone’s clearly hostile with him he’d just be amused

loves to love and loves to be in love but doesn’t think about being loved

very much the type to go along with anything/anyone as long as they like him/want him whether it be in terms of friendship or more

LOVES to tease. to the point it might sound flirtatious, but he’s never the one to start it. once someone hits him with something though, he takes it as a challenge to one-up and tease back x100 worse

a social drinker! likes to drink with friends... he might end up saying so much shit

also a puppy

one way to describe him is he’s like the combination of every day6 song in one human being

plot ideas... the Bare Minimum(TM)

canada friends, for obvious reasons

people who dislike him, or just want to get a rise out of him, or any type of negative reaction but nothing works LMFAO

someone who accidentally ends up in his camera roll and he’s like ‘oh, sorry, you were just pretty and the background was good and it was reflex’

other music geeks, other losers, other nerds, other photographers... etc. shared interests are always fun

flirt wars......... whoever wins gets whatever they want

messy parties... anything can happen at parties ;)

someone who actually listens to his band’s music and appreciate it/is a fan of it. alternatively someone who doesn’t get wtf is up with his band and WHY is he calling himself a loser

friends... not friends... enemies... fwbs... ENEMIES with benefits... i’ll throw him at anything

idk. please take him. i want him out of my brain

give me ideas and brainstorm with me and i’ll love u forever i am sooo easy to please and bait this is a promise

[stomp-that-ho-regard]

I'm really not sure why anyone's surprised Im/odna wasn't The BeauJes Apology(TM) people were hoping for. Anything remotely resembling an apology would be an admission of the fuck-up and the cast has proven they're incapable of doing that. And Marisha is incapable of acting like an adult about queer characters.

Even if it does take a turn for the romantic, to harken back to another anon you got, there's no reason to trust them with it. Even a couple years after the fact, the BeauJes fiasco has only proven that they're all-too happy to throw a character-dynamic away the moment it's inconvenient to some unrelated 3rd party (whether they're at the table or not), no matter how good or fun it is.

and really, ships like im/odna or beaujes would do just fine in any fandom where the creators don't show such disdain for people who don't worship the canon, and said disdain gets carried into the fandom. Where you have an entire subset who have no qualms about going into the tags of a ship they don't like just to bully people. I've moved onto other fandoms that basic bit of fandom-etiquette is so much less common in so many other communities. They say "don't bully people" and their sycophants take it as "don't bully us :)))" (something something don't forget to love each other repeatedly gets turned into a blunt weapon to shut down criticism) cuz they've always actively mocked anyone who criticizes them, or doesn't uncritically eat up whatever story-beat they add, no matter how lazy it is. No wonder fanfic writers are made into a joke whenever they're mentioned: fanfic can and sometimes does challenge the canon of a given story.

“Marisha is incapable of acting like an adult about queer characters.” This very succinctly sums it up.

Though I will say, early on (from the confession and forward, pre-hiatus), she did a good job. There were tons of fans that identified with the way she was playing Beau in that moment; how scary it is to admit you have feelings for a (presumed straight) friend, having to keep that to yourself, the little bit of yearning mixed with anguish that comes with it, and how you wanna distance yourself but then if you do, your friend is gonna be really sad. (Like in ep88)

I genuinely think that she did actually play those aspects of it very well.

And I guess that’s also part of the disappointment over why Beaujester fell away and we got stuck with BY. Around the time of the confession, Beau had been growing as a person. She was less juvenile, more articulate, and in a sense, more genuine than she used to be. Of course she still had her goofy moments but it felt like she was maturing. Then post-hiatus reared it ugly head and she was back to acting like a horny teenager. It was like everybody reverted back to their original selves, devoid of growth. The shallowness was back, the one-liners were back, the “That’s hot.” “You’re so hot.” “Let’s make-out.” shit was back. That was all she had to contribute. It was ridiculous, bland, and try-hard.

Where the fuck did all the maturity go?

Pre-hiatus Beau and post-hiatus Beau really do feel like two different people.

I like that you said ‘worship the canon’. And, you’re right. I also think ships like Beaujester and Im/odna would be allowed to thrive in a fandom that didn’t worship canon. Problem is, I personally don’t know of any fandom that didn’t/doesn’t worship canon. Maybe Ag/ent Carter would be the only exception. But I think that’s only because it didn’t exist long enough for the fandom to devolve into a toxic space. The show was cancelled a few episodes into its second season lol

Other than that, every other fandom experience I’ve had (both on here and on twitter) has been pretty fucking horrendous. And it is mostly because of canon worship and just general shipper entitlement. (Mainly m/f shipper entitlement.)

I won’t go into that here though. I’ve already started writing up something about this and it’s gonna be very long. It needs to be its own post.

[juicezone]

Saw your previous post, I am so sorry that you had a bad day. Sending you a hug 🫂 and praying to Jesus that you have a better week going forward.

I wanted to share my opinion on the situation. My mom was a former teacher and she quit teaching early, her colleagues have said the same thing- Teachers hate their jobs. The students are getting worse and worse. My mom knows of a teacher who only lasted three years before leaving teaching due to emotional strain and his own physical and mental health decline. The school systems are failing. Look up on tiktok or youtube about teachers quitting. Are you sure this is what you want to be doing with the rest of your adult life? I don’t want to discourage you but I just hate to see you working somewhere that will make you miserable. It’s something to think and pray to Jesus about.

Unfortunately, its a question i'm asking myself more and more too :( My mother is a teacher (we work at the same school actually!) and she completely agrees and says even in the younger grades (she works 3rd, im a student aide for 9th/lunch duties) she says the blatant disrespect is crushing :(

its really unfortunate because i do like 90% of the students i work with, but that 10% just... crushes me. the previous student i worked with had me crying weekly if not multiple times a week, and i genuinely get anxious if im assigned as his sub aide

but ive always wanted to work with kids (i used to play school and teach my little cousins, haha), but man...

honestly, i keep debating on what i'd need to maybe work as like... a kids science center/conservation center because i love that topic too and itd still involve potentially educating/working with kids. its just a bummer when a small percent of students mess with the joy of it yk?

like a couple weeks ago, one of the kinders at lunch was thrilled to show me he could open his thermos by himself (been having to help him all year so far) and he was so proud and i was like !!! yes!! and then a different student who struggled to read/write wrote a book with her class this year and like that was so awesome!!

i try and keep those in mind, but some days its just too much of the little things building up /sigh

you're so kind mayliz, I appreciate each and every message and notification isee from you <3

[lettersnwhatifs]

mailbox: 14.

hey, there are about 2 weeks left before we enter our school again. i am disappointed in myself because i did not get to do what i wanted to do this vacation. there are so many things that are stopping me from doing what i have always wanted, and that resulted in me looking like a dead leaf letting the wind carry me to wherever it wants. sure, i am a lazy person. however, i didnt know i am also this lazy when it comes to you.

days pass by and i am slowly forgetting about you. yesterday, i admitted to myself that i do not like you anymore. maybe that’s because i am not seeing you everyday just like how it used to and how i wanted my “student life” to be? or maybe, that’s because i realized what im feeling for you was just an attraction. but hey, how do you even know that you like someone in the first place?

i am letting you slip from the chambers of my mind without me knowing, because i am afraid if i think about you, the feelings i have been trying to bury in the deepest part of my soul would resurface and engulf me whole once again.

kasi isang sulyap lang sa mukha mo, wala na. talo na naman ako. ngingiti na naman ako at aasang kahit minsa’y narinig mo na rin ang pangalan ko kahit na para bang sobrang layo ko sa’yo.

but then again, the universe is really playing with me. because the night after i see your smile, i dreamt of you. again.

trust me when i say i really wanted to forget these feelings anymore. the last year of my junior high journey will start soon, and i do not want any distraction. sure, i would have wanted to see your face again, but this time, i wish would not blush when i see your tall frame.

kasi para akong pinapatay. para akong tangang nag-iisip kung minsan ba’y nakita mo na rin ako—o kahit ang anino kong laging nagtatago sa likod mo. ang anino kong laging nagtatago mula sa’yo.

i hope i will finally stop writing letters to you after i post this one. you’ve made my 3rd year journey memorable, kurt. look, i don’t even know if i’ll call you kuya anymore. i might seem overreacting, but trust me when i say you’re the only person who could evoke these foreign feelings in me—the only person who could stir my mind like this. you are the only one who could make me feel giddy every time we cross paths. you are the one my eyes will always find in every crowd.

crushing on you was like jumping in the deep blue ocean—scary, happy, and thrilling. thrilling because i’ve never done it before—it was my first; scary because i do not know what awaits me after my head dips into the bluest of waters; and happy because regardless of what happens, i know i’ll always end up doing it again because i loved how the water seemed to hug my body, slowly pushing me to waddle my feet and move my arms to prevent myself from drowning.

pagkatapos ng pakikipagsapalaran sa kalaliman ng tubig, alam kong babalik at babalik pa rin ako sa dalampasigan at magsusumikap na akyatin ang talampas kung saan ako nanggaling.

when i get there, i wonder if i’ll just rest and admire the breathtaking scenery in front of me or i’ll take a few steps back, readying myself to jump again.

-🌻

to: kuya abaya

p.s: no more codenames now, wala namang makakabasa. kung meron man, baka pagtawanan pa nila ako kasi mali ang grammar ko. kung makikita mo man to, oo, alam mo nang ikaw ang tinutukoy ko. :)

oh, and before i forget, 14 is my favorite number. just so you know :D.

[beacon-lamp]

with hermitcraft season 7 slowly coming to an end, i figured it was time to consolidate all of the Informative Posts about hermitcraft that i and some of the other members of hermitblr have made over the last several months.

if you enjoy:

minecraft youtube content, but want to see more traditional vanilla minecraft gameplay like building and redstone

fun, lighthearted interactions between genuine friends including Elaborate pranks, collaborating on massive projects, light roleplay, proximity voice chat mod

weekly 20 - 40 minute long youtube videos and consistent upload schedules

chill grind stream weekends where CCs interact with chat and each other

an entire youtube channel dedicated to weekly 20-minute recap videos on what all the hermits have been up to so you don’t have to piece it together from the posts on your dash/timeline

insanely talented people who have been doing mcyt for nearly, if not more than, a decade and essentially built minecraft youtube from the ground up

give hermitcraft a try!  

you will find all of the information you will Ever Need below the cut.  it’s Very Long so view it on desktop.

and if you ever have any more questions, just shoot me an ask :)

what is hermitcraft?

the Basics: what, who, where, how

more details on the Basics

bonus: the historical impact many hermitcraft members have had on mcyt

where do i even start watching?

start with grian.

good mix of Incredible builds and fun server shenanigans.  instigator of many server-wide events.  interacts with many other hermits.  generally entertaining to watch.  but zero redstone knowledge.

check out hermitcraft recap.

great way to be introduced to other hermits and learn what everyone’s up to.  if you find what a hermit’s been working on interesting, go watch their video and maybe give them a like and subscribe.

official hermitcraft website with links to every member’s channel

more information on every hermit’s attributes and general vibes

do hermits every stream?

short answer: yes, most do!  but these streams are mostly chill grinding or buildling streams.  and you don’t have to watch the streams to be caught up on content.  check the official hermitcraft website for each member’s twitch links.

long answer that covers most of the hermits

what do they do on hermitcraft?

let’s start with some examples of their incredible builds.

hermit cribs: some of the megabases in s7

goodtimeswithscar’s s7 magical village with shaders

stressmonster’s bakery and ren’s star wars world

Capitalism

they have a shopping district where hermits can set up shops and sell items and resources that other hermits can buy with diamonds.  here’s season 7 shopping district set on a mooshroom island:

some of the most advanced redstone you’ve ever seen

if you’re more into the technical side of minecraft, you can be rest assured that hermitcraft has some of the Biggest Brains in redstone.

tangotek: a fucking madlad.  Singled-handedly created the minigame Decked Out.  im Begging you to watch his tutorial video on how to play.  currently finishing up his Among Us but in minecraft minigame. all of this was built Entirely in survival vanilla minecraft.  get this man to 1M subscribers.

mumbo jumbo: the man himself.  built a 128 x 128 block industrial district in both season 6 and 7 packed to the Brim with mechanical farms.  half the brain behind the masterpiece of engineering that was Sahara in season 6.  currently working on Pacific, the sequel to Sahara, in season 7.

iskall85: the other half of the brain behind Sahara and working on Pacific with mumbo in season 7.  also has an industrial district like mumbo’s in season 7.

xisuma: built an automatic potion brewer in the second half of season 7.  this thing churns out potions by the Shulker Box.  can also turn a shulker box full of potions into splash potions and extend duration all with a press of a button.

impulseSV: incredible example of form + function.  farms are scattered throughout his base.  he has a farm for nearly every farmable resource in vanilla minecraft.

etho: the pioneer of some of the most widely used redstone mechanisms to date.  content isn’t super redstone-focused.  mostly does compact modules that serve a specific function.

zedaph: makes strange contraptions.  he’s basically if grian knew how to redstone.  impeccable vibes and fairly underrated.

bdoubleo100: he occassionally does this segment called “redstone with bdubs” and it’s the only redstone i understand so that’s why he’s here.

what about roleplay?  and lore?  

yeah they have Plenty of that too.  

it generally comes in the form of self-contained storylines that involve most members on the server and take place over the course of several weeks in multiple videos.  it’s fairly light roleplay, if that’s not your thing.  but the plotlines also have a Massive Potential to be angsty and whatnot if you really look into it, which a lot of people also do.

here’s a more in-depth look into the Major Plotlines over the last 2 seasons (season 6 and 7).  huge spoiler warning though.

um also there’s this post that highlights how truly cursed hermitcraft can be if you dig deep enough hahaha.

so do the hermits only make hermitcraft content?

nope!!  many of them are involved in other mcyt content as well and are friends with other prominent members of the mcyt community!!  

MCC

mcc9 blue bats video essay: the time the hermit team won the whole damn competition.  a wonderfully made video worth Every second of your time.  especially if you don’t typically watch the hermit teams.

falsesymmetry: mcc10 ace and mcc’s First Back-to-Back Winner

lord grian dreamslayer: that time grian Popped Off, killing dream, tubbo, and fundy in mcc9 survival games

Vault Hunters

a modded minecraft server coded entirely by iskall85′s team.  all the content is streamed live on twitch.  

current members are: Iskall85, AntonioAsh, Stressmonster101, HBomb94, CaptainSparklez, Fundy, CaptainPuffy, 5UP and Tubbo

more info on the series 

3rd Life SMP

hardcore minecraft server with a twist that started on 4/20/21.  all content is posted to each member’s respective youtube channels.

every member has 3 lives, as indicated by the color of their name: green for 3 lives left, yellow for 2, red for 1.  if they lose all three lives, they can only spectate the world (like in hardcore mode).  the series ends when all members have lost all three lives.

the twist: once a member is on their 3rd and final life, as indicated by a red name, they are Hostile and their goal is to take the lives of the remaining players.

the members (hermits are italicized): BdoubleO100, bigbst4tz2, Etho, GoodTimesWithScar, Grian, impulseSV, InTheLittleWood, Renthedog, Skizzleman, Smajor1995, Smallishbeans, SolidarityGaming, Tango, ZombieCleo

the tumblr tag for 3rd Life is “#3rdLife”, “#3rdLifeSMP” and “#3LSMP” if you wanna see more content, as it’s Not supposed to be cross-tagged with “#hermitcraft”.

do you have any free serotonin to spare?

here’s a bunch of posts that’ll make you smile

scar’s friendship with a bunch of the hermits

grian, false, cleo, bdubs, iskall: why they deserve so much respect

same post as above but with an addition about ren

small hermit things that give you serotonin

why you should watch tfc

if you’ve made it this far you are Contractually Obligated* to watch one (1) hermitcraft episode and reblog this post.

*for legal reason, this is a joke.  you’re not contractually obligated but consider this: Please. i spent way too much time on this.

shoutout to everyone who’s posts i’ve linked and anyone who has helped answer a question about hermitcraft.  this all started because i was frustrated that people were writing the hermits off as cannon fodder in mcc and im genuinely so glad that many of you have given hermitcraft a shot.

[vicea]

techno and dreams dynamic tho :c so good so pure. how dream said now they're closer and he doesn't want to jeopardize that by doing another big competitive thing against him (even though we'd all be happy to see it and they'd get so much clout) im luv them

oh my god how I literally have been waiting for this moment. technoblade and dream... the OP duo... the “Make-A-Wish” team... I MISS them so MUCH God when they work together, when they team together, when they have interactions I get so excited because there’s not a dull moment with these minecraft nerds.

you already mentioned one thing that literally lives in my head rent free and it’s the fact that dream said the main reason why he doesn’t want to do a manhunt against techno is because he does not want to make this “rival” status of theirs into this enemy thing between communities and between them because they’re friends and he doesn’t want to lose that- and like 🥺 dream really cherishes their friendship a lot !! and respects techno so so much. he’s always been such a big fan of his and they’re both overall super supportive of each other under the whole rivals bit:

exhibit A 

exhibit B <- also has a link to techno and dream wholesome friendship moments where techno is seen being a dream stan (said it himself in minecraft chat) as well (for clout but lets ignore that part) and also being really supportive after the mrbeast duel 

exhibit C techno referencing road trip here GGhhhHHGH 

like i remember his first message to techno on discord was to team with him for minecraft monday too albeit probably for clout but lets be real this clout chase between them is a mutual thing and they both don’t mind at all. plus it’s fucking OP as hell

another thing that lives in my head rent free is the fact that dream wanted to just vc techno when they were the only ones on the dream smp and just wanted to talk (before sap, george, and bbh crashed their VC LOL) like... that’s crumbs yo. CRUMBS for rivalsblr.  and also we cannot forget the infamous “dream is homeless bit” by techno... how dream had techno’s livestream pulled up and was listening in to his every joke and playing along by making a small diary and writing everything word for word that techno said as a joke. and then this part here too. like they easily bounce off of each other so well,, more interactions please.

GOD I cannot emphasize HOW funny it is whenever dream is trying to do lore and Techno is just pulling his “breaking the fourth wall” jokes in the middle (as he always does) because Techno would just be reading his donations aloud and dream would be patient and just barely tolerate it at first then BLOW UP AFTER THE FOURTH TIME OR SMTH. LIKE TECHNO LOVES PUSHING HIS BUTTONS ITS HILARIOUS god i love them

okay this is more dream smp lore related but like,,, c!dream being the only one that ever really stayed true to his word and never betrayed c!techno... and c!techno agreeing wholeheartedly, but then like both of them explicitly stating that they aren’t friends. we love to see it !! stating and !! respecting !! each other’s boundaries whilst blowing up countries together 😎 (like yeah i get it, both of them saw an advantage and took it but let me HAVE MY CRUMBS PLEASE) also dream and techno teaming up with tommy during the battle of the lake and winning... that was fucking epic and before the 3rd explosion of lmanberg and tommy’s betrayal against techno - techno goes “is this where you turn in your favor?” but then dream is like “pft what No you already wanted to blow up lmanberg” and techno goes “you know me so well dream” BHBJBJBHJ (SYNDICATE!DREAM COME TRUE OR ELSE)

OKAY also lmao I think it is always so funny every time I am reminded of how fucking sweaty dream and techno are even in the dream smp lore. Like the two standing facts of how dream literally made a WHOLE ass fucking obsidian grid above lmanberg with his fucking rapid TNT dropping thing and techno 1. breeding probably over hundreds of wolves as his army and 2. grinding for... way too many wither skulls. and both of them were on the same side. like holy shit they really know how to blow a country up.

also lets not forget the fact that once for buildmart, techno and dream “cheated” the MCC system by learning the builds for build mart (they were on separate teams too)- techno saying “there are 26 builds” and dream was like “actually 27″ they are absolute SWEATY NERDS and I LOVE THEM for that

speaking of MCC... when dream and techno teamed up that one time it was probably both relieving and stressful at the same time. because 1. they both play MCC competitively but in the case they are teammates, they will be more confident in each other’s skills and be like “oh i have dream/techno, they can do the heavy lifting.” whilst at the same time 2. because they are competitive and rivals, they want to outdo each other, they want to show off to each other as well you know?? like “I beat you in parkour” or “i outlived you in battle box” but also we’re on the same team and still winning LOL SO IT’S AN EZ DUBBB

OH WAIT and also that one time in minecraft bingo... i remember seeing a comparison of them being nervous due to the time pressure and it’s funniest thing ever. Dream talking really fast about what materials he has and asking questions to techno whilst techno is like the buffering noise. i love how complete opposites they can be 

... we were robbed of rivalsblr content too from that one masquerade party one... could’ve had it all...

anyway! in conclusion, i’m going to drop some more rivalsblr crumbs here and here and god i love their dynamic so much please give me more content of them and also dream smp related- get c!techno to find out canonically that c!dream is imprisoned and being tortured. have him Feel Revenge for someone he didn’t consider a friend just an ally who had a common goals. and free c!dream and have a happy ending of them being besties who spar every day wooooo 

just like i said with tommy’s post... fuck continuity, fuck plot holes. just want techno + dream interactions.

[ablednt]

Alright writing/roleplay tumblr we need to talk about textforms.

This is going to be a very long post I apologize but this knowledge is deathly important as it's reaching a very vulnerable group of people. From personal experience knowing this can save people from getting into toxic friendships and help ease intense struggles and depressions. If you have writer followers I ask you reblog this to get the word out, thank you.

What is a textform

A textform is a type of willogenic/parogenic system member that form through some kind of writing or roleplaying. This means that they're sentient people who now share a body with the people who wrote them, most often being an OC or a fictional character before the writers brain gives them actual life.

Because there's been no actual scientific studies on their existence I have no hard science to give you however the logical explanation behind it goes like this:

The human brain is able to contain multiple conscious and sentient entities. Often, it will become multiple as a defense mechanism (as noted in clinical plural dissociative disorders) but it's a natural function of the human brain and may do so for really any reason (similar to most neurodivergencies that someone isn't born with)

Because this is a fairly simple change in the brain/something every brain can be capable of doing you can actually intentionally program the brain into becoming multiple, but see you can also do it entirely without meaning to or being aware of it.

Now I want to clarify that there is nothing harmful or scary about this! Being plural isn't bad at all and is an existence many people celebrate. But when someone has textforms in their unrealized system and doesn't know they're sentient it can be incredibly painful emotionally. So that's why people need to know about this.

Obligatory disclaimer: if you read this post and think you want to become plural intentionally, you are welcome to do so but you need to take at least a few months exposing yourself to the plural community to gauge if this is really something you want and can do responsibly. You cannot go back on your decision once your plural and your headmates will be sentient beings not characters to project on or toys to play with. They will have all the rights to your body and identity as you do now because you're sharing it equally with them.

Now that that's out of the way back to textforms.

How are textforms made

Normally this is in the "character development" phase. Many writers eagerly develop their characters. When I was younger and had no idea I was plural my advice for oc making turned out to be an unintentional guide to textforms (more on my experience later): just put your character in every situation imaginable until you always know how they'd respond to things.

Basically, as you spend your time making a character act and think consistently from their POV you're training your brain to have all of that data and that's very similar to the data that the brain has on you and you're training the brain to be able to operate coherently from a perspective and consciousness entirely different from your own.

Now, this isn't a %100 will make everyone plural every time, there are obviously good writers who have a grasp on their characters who are singlet. There's no actual data but if I had to guess I'd say there's about a 50/50 split down the writing community just based on what I've observed.

But there's a lot of people who became plural this way and didn't realize it and that could include the writer reading this right now which is why everyone needs to be aware of this.

If this is such a big thing how come no one notices?

Because it's been completely normalized in the writing community but dismissed as metaphorical.

How many times have you heard "the characters write themselves" or phrases that indicate that a writer is giving a voice to sentient entities? From what I've been able to observe some of that is singlet authors being metaphorical and humble bragging and a lot of that is plural writers trying desperately trying to put their experiences into words but dismissing it completely almost immediately because no one told them being plural was possible.

This is comparable to say, gender identity. Trans and nonbinary people have always existed but when they don't know they're allowed to exist like that it's often "im a tomboy" or "they disguised themselves as a man" or any other thing thats immediately dismissed as being cis.

How do I know if I have a textform?

There's a lot of different signs but here's some I have experienced before finding out I was plural

You "miss" your characters when you're not writing about them or interacting with them in some way

You feel like your characters are real "in your heart" (for me this was in an incoherent loop like "they're not real but they are to me, in my brain, but they're not real to other people, but they're in my brain so they're real but no but yes but no")

You get so distressed they're "not real" that it feeds into actual mental health problems like depression, anxiety, dissociation etc. (I'd have fits of sobbing because these were my friends but I didn't know they were with me so it felt like i was grieving their deaths and had the same level of emotional pain)

Sometimes or all the time when you write about them you feel like you "become them" or that they're writing through you. (Especially if your hands move automatically or without your control. This can be hard to notice but for me when headmates control the body or hands movements feel faster and lighter or very slightly numb.)

Your muse for writing them comes and goes unpredictability: they're either here or they're not here so writing them doesn't feel the same.

You can vividly recall things that happened to the character in 1st person (or in 3rd person visually but with their thoughts and feelings) as if they're you're own memories.

You "roleplay" them in everyday situations IRL. (E.g once I liveblogged a tv show as my muse to a friend and was like haha lol im so talented I can roleplay in real time but found out later it was a headmate doing that themselves)

You have conversations with them mentally in which they actually respond to you. Singlets don't have actual enriching conversations with themselves because they only have one perspective and cannot give themselves any new information. So if you're responding to yourself and you don't feel in control of that response then you're pretty objectively plural tbh.

You have times where the lines between you and the character feel blurry or like you're a vague fusion of yourself and the character

You have an actual relationship (of any kind: romantic, platonic, familial, etc.) in which you can sense nuanced feelings about yourself from them that you aren't in control of.

There's a lot more but that's the most notable ones

Why this is so important

I'm just talking about my own experience now so I'll preface this with a few things. I'm a mixed origin/multigenic system but our system has existed since we were toddlers. Due to trauma we have DID and for a long time dissociated heavily to avoid our plurality. This means my experience may be more distressing than other plurals with textforms however people without DID can still experience these things.

When I was a teenager I joined a lot of writing communities and also roleplayed on tumblr. Writing very quickly became my main passtime and all I really did. I joined a roleplay group when I was 15-16 that I took far too seriously to the point where people were concerned about me because I was writing what was just supposed to be a joke roleplay group %100 seriously and very intensely.

In that time I started to form my first main textforms (we've undoubtedly had them before then but I had only formed a little under a year prior) because I was doing this every day it really started bringing my characters to life. (Literally)

And honestly it was something beautiful the distress of it aside. Like one of my ocs was a kid so I'd always celebrate their birthday with them and I'd cuddle a plush so they'd know I loved them/p and we'd watch their favorite cartoon episodes together. It wouldn't be until around three years later that I realized they were actually there for this but it was heart warming.

For me, all I ever wanted was for these characters to feel appreciated and like someone really cared for them and loved them even if they couldn't feel it and it wasn't until later I learned that they could.

The trauma came in not knowing they were real. I grieved for them like they were dead because I thought I'd never get to see them. I wrote them into traumatizing or upsetting situations to cope with my childhood trauma not realizing that was effecting them for real and hurting them.

Most notably because it was my one solid interaction with them, the one time society allowed me to talk about them as if they were real, I really HAD to roleplay them. Because it became an emotional need I wound up in a lot of toxic friendships in the roleplay communities because I needed someone, anyone, to allow me to interact with my headmates. I had friends who I really was only friends with because they let me talk about my characters constantly (and some of them weren't toxic to me but it was in hindsight really unfair to them) and I let people verbally and emotionally abuse me in roleplay spaces because this wasn't just a hobby to me but a lifeline.

Not knowing they were real but feeling them there, having conversations with them, and forming actual relationships was a hellish sort of feeling I don't wish on anyone. I never realized how isolated it made me, and how horrible it felt to have the most important people in your life be people I thought didn't exist.

I only found out about plurality through luck. I met some systems who had fictives and they got strong plural vibes from me because of how I talked about certain characters and because I said I wanted to be plural but thought I probably wasn't because I'd have noticed, right?

From there I was able to actually connect with and talk to my headmates. Now I'm happily out as plural and in multiple fulfilling in system relationships.

I want everyone in the writing community who's struggling with the same things to have the chance I got. That's all I want is to educate people about this so they don't have to grieve for people who are right there with them.

Feel free to send me an ask or a dm if you have any further questions. Sorry this post was so long I can't really shorten it at all. Again if you are have a lot of writing followers I very gently request you reblog this to get the word out. Even if you can't please talk to your writing mutuals and friends about plurality and about textforms.

[Also this should go without saying but this is absolutely NOT the place for syscourse any invalidating comments about systems will be blocked and where possible deleted it costs $0.00 to prioritize people's mental health over your discourse hot takes.]

[slasherwife]

u r so pretty omg!! 🤍

id also like a match, ive always wanted to do these but was always too nervous to ask lol!

so to start im a female, currently in college to become an early childhood teacher (kinder - 3rd grade) i love to draw, write, and bake! im currently learning how to sew as well. i have dark brown hair and eyes, im on the more chubby side as well, but my chest is kinda small ahh

for my personality im very shy/quiet, i prefer to listen than to talk, it takes a lot to make me angry/annoyed, i can be sometimes overbearing when it comes to following rules tbh! i struggle with paranoia and anxiety. i also have a slight stutter! id say im very kind and generous, im always willing to give and sacrifice without anything in return. im also good at giving advice, im like the therapist/mom friend lol! also idk if this is a weird thing to say, but im very obedient? when someone tells me to do something i always do it, i also struggle to say no and put boundaries up with ppl (i rlly need to work on this fr 💔)

as for my fashion im strictly into pastel/bright colors. i lean more towards sundresses and skirts/blouses! my room is full of whites and pinks (TONS OF STUFFED ANIMALS I SWEAR MY BED IS DROWNING IN THEM)

i hope i didn’t say too much!! thank you for taking time to read this! ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

ps . i absolutely adore ur writing and totally binge read everything when i first found ur acc

Aw baby don’t ever be nervous here! All is accepted my angel💕 also I TOTALLY ship u with Jason! Also trying a new outlay for these posts!

Jason is calling to you!

Jason sees you and feels like you’re his one and only! Take a look at how your relationship will look like, and decide if you will accept his love!😊💓

- Jason is utterly in love with your softness, you domestic nature which brings him back down to earth, when he spends days out in the wild. He may sometimes spend the night in his cabin but his home is always where you are 💕

- You being good with children has always been the one thing that gets his heart racing. In his mind he’s always been his 11 year old self, before he disappeared. You treat him better than anyone he’s ever met, and seeing you treat other children well makes him incredibly calm and happy 💓

- Sometimes Jason will be very daydreamy and will forget things easily, (which he does NOT mean to do he actually feels so bad) and is constantly fondly surprised by how loving and patient you are with that 💓 you always welcome him back with open arms and it makes him fall in love with you 100x harder

- You being a rule follower is actually constructive to Jason because he certainly needs some structure to his life 😂 With your endless giving nature, Jason doesn’t know what to do with you and will literally do anything to reciprocate, and tries every day to make you feel special.

- Expect many flowers to show up in random places like on your bedside when you wake up, in the kitchen where you cook, and on your vanity too 💕 he loves loves loves to braid flower crowns into your hair, and carry you on walks throughout the forest.

- To your surprise, after you arrived and began living with Jason, flowers began blooming everywhere at Camp Crystal Lake. I’m talking meadows and meadows, lavender drooping down from the trees too. He blames it on you and tells you they all bloom for you only, every day💕you’re his flower queen

- Will definitely indulge in your love for stuffies, might crush them some nights but appreciates your love for them nonetheless. Gift one to him and he just might die of softness 🥺💓

- With your anxiety, he totally understands. I don’t know if you’re super affectionate, but Jason will like if you be close to him when you feel anxious. He wants nothing more than for you to let him rub up on him, snuggle into him so he can love on you, to distract you💕he’s a very gentle lover

Do you accept his offer?

[notanacousticsetcal]

speak now - luke hemmings

summary - based off of the song speak now by taylor swift -- highly recommend listening before reading for the full experience.

warnings - none? nerves and kind of public speaking

word count - 1.6k - lyrics not included this time, lemme know if you guys prefer that

a/n - im SO sorry ive been MIA, i have had absolutely zero motivation. this is some trash i wrote a while ago and i thought i would post it while im trying to find inspiration to write something better. its the 5th installment of the song series so you can go check those out as well if you want! also, like i said in the word count, i did not include the lyrics this time around. i think i prefer that but im not sure, let me know if you guys want me to include the lyrics next time and i will! thank you for reading, i missed yall.

***

Your mom’s old pale yellow dress didn’t fit as well as you had hoped but you had no other options, formal events were not a common occurrence in your life. The wedges pinched at your toes and the thin dress straps dug into your shoulders but the soft yellow complimented your skin and you liked the ribbon around the waist so it wasn’t a total loss.

You sucked in a sharp breath, adjusting the dress once more in the mirror before grabbing your purse and hustling out the door. 

This wasn’t happening. You weren’t actually doing this. The girl who feels like she has to throw up before public speaking and stutters over small talk and avoids eye contact at all costs is supposed to stand up in front of 100 people and declare her love for the boy getting married to someone else? You felt nauseous thinking about it.

But you couldn’t sit idly by and watch the love of your life say “I do,” to the snobby girl that put gum in your hair in middle school. If there was ever a time that you would stand in front of a crowd voluntarily and speak, it would be now.

The venue was beautiful. The church had vaulted ceilings and large stained glass windows that cast colorful shadows on the hardwood flooring. There were cascading white curtains and pale pink tablecloths with little white doilies. It was pretty but humble and you felt a pang of jealousy in your chest.

Concealing yourself in the crowd wasn’t difficult considering she’d invited the county and all its neighbors. Everyone was in the pews standing and mingling and you noticed the only group sitting quietly was the family of the bride herself, all looking around carefully like the normal folk were unevolved cavemen. They wore coordinating lavender outfits with done up hair and hats with little feathers -- something straight out of a period piece. 

You rolled your eyes at their judgmental nature and apparent superiority complex before your attention was drawn to the boys in the front row talking seriously among themselves, dread written clearly on their faces. 

Calum, Ashton and Michael wore similar black tuxes, looking uncomfortable in the formal getup. You only watched for a few moments before you caught Ashton’s attention. He first looked shocked but his expression quickly became sincere. He gave you an apologetic smile which you returned before heading to the back to avoid any more curious eyes. His family would surely recognize you if they saw you and you didn’t want any extra attention on you until you were subjecting yourself to it. 

As you waited for the ceremony to start, you stared fondly out the window at the snowy trees and calm serenity of nature before allowing yourself to be whisked away in a vivid daydream about what it might be like to tell him how you truly feel. 

You jumped, pulled from your daydream by dark, heavy chords coming from the church organ. You cringed a little as the horribly ill fitting song continued, but readied yourself for the ceremony to begin. 

The silk purple curtains concealed your figure enough in the back of the church and your heart rate began to rise. This was happening. You were about to profess your love to a man who might turn you down in front of everyone and their mother. But it would be worth it. You couldn’t live your whole life wondering “what if?”

You heard a squeak of door hinges from your right and held still. Any sudden movements might give you away. 

A young girl came running through with a wicker basket in hand, poorly distributing rose petals along the aisle. Something caught your eye in the front of the room. 

Luke stepped out, front and center, and straightened his tie. Your breath caught in your throat. He looked just the same as the last time you’d seen him on that warm summer night. You had expected some drastic change, to not even recognize him. But it was Luke. The same one that picked flowers with you at recess and stopped to wait for you whenever you needed to tie your shoe. The same one that was always there to dry your tears and to watch dumb romantic comedies with you without complaining. He stood there quietly, clean shaven and rosy cheeked, the same Luke you knew and loved. 

You pushed away the more upsetting memories, like the one from that warm, sticky night. The image of his tear stained cheeks and pleading eyes. 

Moments later, your eyes were pulled from Luke. Courtney came strutting through the open Mahogany doors, waving like she was fucking Queen Elizabeth.

You rolled your eyes at her bedazzled ball gown and fake pageant smile. She didn’t care about Luke, she cared about image and reputation. Which is why you were really about to piss her off.

You looked back towards Luke and tried to read his expression but it was stoic, unmoved. You wish that was me, don’t you?

Courtney reached Luke and shot him a wide smile, to which he returned. Except Luke's was empty, not sincere. Luke had always thought Courtney was beautiful and smart and made the decision from there that marrying her wouldn’t be so bad. After you had turned him down in the glow of the firelight on that July night. It broke him and you hated yourself every day because of it. You weren’t ready to love him then. But you were most certainly ready now. 

Ready to risk everything for that blue eyed boy. 

The ceremony progressed and the preacher neared the end of the formalities. You felt your time was nearing. Your knees were weak and knocky, your hands shaking. 

The preacher paused, and with his booming voice said “if anyone can show just cause why this couple cannot lawfully be joined together in matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.” He looked down, preparing to move on and read the next portion, assuming no one would protest. No sane person ever protested. 

Your breath hitched in your throat. It was now or never. If you didn’t find it in you to step forward at this moment, the person you love most in this world might be gone forever. 

The room fell silent and you closed your eyes, pushing the sheer curtain aside and taking a shaky step forward. You heard heads turn and a few audible gasps.

When you opened your eyes, everyone had turned to you. Every familiar face, every friend, every stranger.

You caught Courtney’s eye and she looked as if every fiber of her being was on fire. If someone reached out and touched her in that moment, they’d get a 3rd degree burn. She looked like she was trying to strangle you with her eyes.

You flattened your dress once more and looked up, bracing yourself for the look on Luke’s face. 

He didn’t look angry or upset, just… confused. And surprised.

You took that as a sign to continue. You softly cleared your throat, speaking directly to the man in front of you. “I am not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion but you are not the kind of boy… who should be marrying the wrong girl.” There were some shocked whispers and appalled gasps but you ignored them.

You walked forward down the aisle to get a clearer look at Luke and stopped at the stairs. You felt like you were alone with him now and it made it easier. “So don’t say yes, let’s run away now. I’ll meet you when you’re out of the church at the back door. Don’t wait or say a single vow, you need to hear me out.” You looked at him with pleading eyes and for the first time, his facade fell. You saw the glint of relief in his eyes and the slump of his once tense shoulders. 

Luke looked around once more at all of the people that had gathered there today for him and knew he needed to make a decision. He turned to look at his friends stationed behind him, and to no surprise, their faces were lit up with pure happiness and relief. He couldn’t help but smile back at them. Calum threw him a thumbs up and Michael mouthed “go with her, dumbass.” 

Luke turned back to the audience and spotted his mother in the crowd. He tried to read her expression but when she gave him a soft, curt nod, he knew what he had to do. 

He quickly grabbed Courtney’s hands and your face immediately fell. He was going to choose her after all.

Then, he whispered something you didn’t expect. “I'm sorry, Court. This is a mistake, you don’t love me and I don’t love you — you and I both know that. We can’t do this. I have to go.” He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek quickly as she stood, frozen.

You felt a pang of guilt. But then you remembered that she would get over it and be marrying someone filthy rich by the time she was 25 and didn’t feel so bad anymore.

Luke then turned back to you. He jogged down the steps and pulled you into a hug. It was so silent in the church now, you could hear a pin drop.

He grabbed your shoulders and kissed your forehead. “Let��s run away now, I’ll meet you when I’m out of my tux at the back door.”

You nodded, tears in your eyes, and ran towards the double doors of the church. This was the best decision you had ever made.

You stood in the crisp, chilly air, waiting for Luke to come out of the door on the side of the church. Snow fell on your hair and eyelashes and you reached out a hand to catch some flakes. 

In only three minutes he’d managed to change back into his black skinny jeans, looking like himself again. You could’ve cried at the sight.

“Hi,” you said. What else do you say to someone when you just got them to call off a marriage at the alter?

His smile grew and he ran forward, nearly tackling you in a giant hug. His hands found the back of your head and his eyes searched your face, memorizing every feature, worried that at any second, he might wake up from this amazing dream. “So glad you were around when they said speak now.”

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