#to know is one thing but to witness something so wrong is literally so disorienting I’m dizzy just thinking of it

[maggi-cube]

There’s just so much evil I’ve learned about today I don’t know how to hold it all

[starlite-writes]

Hello I am here to be a problem! Anyway!

1 -> Angel 11 -> for any 5 of your kids bc I would ask for all of them but that's excessive so I am just asking for 5! 19 -> Asirli 21 -> Silk and Tussah C: 33 -> Mal 36 -> A......a.......angel......asking for a friend....................also Dr Silk

!! Thank you for asking i appreciate you... dropping these under the cut because BOY did it get long

1. If your oc was to host a TV show, what would it be about? Would your oc be good at it? What sorts of guests would appear?

God, could you imagine Angel hosting any kind of TV show? LMAO But I think, if they had to... maybe some kind of weird psychology show... How To Gaslight 101... /hj They have no guests ever it's just Angel all the time because they can't share the spotlight... but you know, of course, there was a guest on last week; don't you remember? No? Hm, weird. There was definitely someone there. Perhaps you should pay closer attention next time.

11. What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to your oc?  Do they still feel ashamed for it? Were there any witnesses?

Oh, God. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Luke! I think he's still really embarrassed about punching Maximilian when he first showed up... it was really out of character for him, but to be fair this was immediately after Mal in his mind and he was extremely combative and disoriented... he's apologised many times and so has Maximilian for making it worse but that. it took them a while to get over that first impression LMAO like a week before they would even say a word to each other kind of while. But now they're friends so it's cool.

Maximilian... even though it's probably not canon anymore, the masquerade was one of his top three for sure. Being paraded around in fancy clothes and forced to act like you like your kidnapper while you're stuck in a fucked up mass dream with your co-workers, who should have kept you from being here in the first place? That shit scarred him. In Trinity, it is 100% Silk putting him under curfew like a grounded teenager. Absolutely humiliating he has never recovered from that.

Tinashe... she was super excited when she first got her android body,,, but when it inevitably broke down the first time you know she was hella embarrassed and cursing Remy to hell and back. Imagine trying to pass as a person and then your body just breaks??? Awful.

For Mal,,, canonically, I got no idea. in Trinity, his first meeting with Starling. You try to beat someone up and you just beat yourself up instead???? Fucked up. But at least he got a hot black-magic-witch partner-in-crime out of it.

Rixi... that time Tina called her out about being in love with Remy and told her she was crazy for it. Rixi is really good at pretending things don't bother her or brushing them off after she has a cry but I think that's one of the few things that's stuck with her even though she never addressed it again.

The Raven Prince... [All of these words have been stolen from me sorry.]

19. If your oc were to be arrested for something, what would it be for? For being too kind, for a legitimate crime?

Asirli,,, stole a priceless map, probably. They were going to return it! They just wanted to study it a little! Is that so wrong? :(

21. Are there any public events your oc would love to go to? Concerts, plays, movies, parties, etc? What about ones that they would hate? Why?

Oh, hmm... I mean, there's not really anything they couldn't get themselves invited to, if they really wanted, but I think Silk would want to go to a casino and let loose for a weekend. I think she would really enjoy it, actually, especially given her competitive streak, but alas... that would require her to take time away from work. For Tussah... literally anywhere he would not be recognised would be great. Let him be Aurelius for a single day. Let him go to like. an art studio and paint with a group for a day without being hounded about work.

Places they would hate... Silk's is the beach. Tussah's is literally anywhere further than five feet off the ground. In all seriousness, Silk doesn't really enjoy large gatherings all that much, and Tussah gets bored during movies. He's a talker.

33. How does your oc’s own perception of themselves compare to how other people see them? Is your oc aware that other people see them differently (if it’s different)?

Thank you for choosing Mal out of everyone; he is The character for this question!

Mal definitely sees himself as someone who is much smarter and more mature than he is. He thinks he's cunning and strong and all, but he's really just extremely lucky (and being in league with Angel doesn't hurt). Mal's one of those who outwardly has a very inflated sense of self, and to a degree, he's definitely tricked himself into believing it. He's certainly aware that Angel (and most other people) sees him as childish and impulsive, but he doesn't really care too much, because regardless of what Angel says or thinks, they still need him, and vice versa.

36. What is your oc’s ideal night out like? Or would they rather spend it at home?

Wow, I can't imagine why you'd be asking this for them (/lh /s).

For Silk! Her ideal night out is a quiet visit to a planetarium so she can infodump at you about the stars,,, maybe a trip out to the middle of nowhere to look at constellations and have a cup of coffee and some dessert...

For Angel! Good luck getting them rested enough to go anywhere! But if you did manage, they'd probably enjoy a really fancy dinner and a formal concert... or like,,, a night at the opera. You know. Something pretentious.

[altschmerzes]

Anon from earlier here — please feel free to ignore this because it is so ridiculously long and self indulgent that I feel the need to apologise for even putting it in your inbox at all.

Perhaps similarly to you, I’m sort of toe-deep in the Ted Lasso fandom. I’m far too obsessive about the show and the characters to be considered a casual viewer, but completely lacking the emotional capacity to fully absorb myself into a new space. I think this is why I’m so protective of the characters, specifically Jamie, because there’s so much of his arc and backstory that I can relate to, and I’m SO sensitive to the way abuse is portrayed in shows, because it’s rarely done well (from what I’ve seen personally).

The Same Story was one of the first fics I read about Ted Lasso because I wanted read more about Jamie specifically, and I CANNOT tell you how excited I was when I found it. It does (along with your other writing) exactly what the show doesn’t for me. I think the show is the best example of an abused character I’ve seen, but it can’t be perfect, and I found everything I was looking for in your writing. I genuinely can’t thank you enough for that, because it’s been very…. healing ? might be the word ? to read. It’s just done so beautifully and realistically ugh. You’re a really special author.

Going back to the whole Roy thing (who is another favourite character of mine) I think my main issue is the regression as well. Like, yes, first season Roy would ABSOLUTELY charge toward Jamie. Except now we’ve come to understand Roy as a deeply caring, sensitive, protective and anxious person. I don’t think Roy would EVER be violent toward Jamie again after knowing what he knows now, and if he did, he would apologise (or try to, at least.) Maybe we get that in a later episode, I’m not sure.

What’s painful for me about 2.08 is that there was this beautiful, incredible scene that was everything I have ever wanted from an abuse storyline, I could hardly believe what I was watching, and then just…. Nothing. Literally no after effects. Which was ??? Very disorienting ??? Not even a “hey, just checking in man” from one of Jamie’s teammates, a reluctant nod of acknowledgment from Roy, an extra pat on the back from Ted, just… Nothing ??? I absolutely love the show, wouldn’t want to mess with it at all, but this threw me. I’m aware that it is also written for a general audience and not specially for me, a shamelessly demanding and traumatised person, (how dare they!) but yeah, I have a lot of Thoughts on that one.

I’ll self-indulgently attempt to express what I think would be a far more in character interaction between these two post Man City — let’s use the locker room scene in 3.02 as an example:

I don’t think Roy wouldn’t NOT get an instinct to shove Jamie away, because he’s far from perfect — which like you say, makes him far more interesting. I think that Jamie would try and hug him, Roy would make to shove him off, and then stop himself with a Roy Grunt and step away. I think Jamie — being as emotionally intuitive as he is — would pick up on this immediately. Perhaps Jamie would become defensive of this, asking Roy if he’s too afraid to shove him how. He’s not going to break. And I think Roy would probably respond with something along the lines of, “Of course I want to shove you. We’re both pricks. But I’m trying not to be.”

This is of course “along the lines of” as it’s rubbish, hastily put together dialogue, but hopefully you get the idea. Also this is all subjective and I could be completely wrong about Roy and Jamie and Everyone and blah blah blah but yeah. It’s not a perfect response from Roy by any means, but it’s also not a violent one. After all Roy’s growth, I just don’t think he’d ever regress to violence around Jamie ever again — or at least he’d try his best not to.

I have a thousand more thoughts on all of this but I’ll restrain myself here. I’ve sent one or two asks before (you’re actually the only person I’ve interacted with who is interested in Ted Lasso) and I must say it’s been such a delight to get a response. As a fellow aromantic / survivor (I’m always embarrassed to use that word) of abuse, it’s really really lovely to have these little mini discussions with you. I love love love hearing what you have to say. If I ever send an ask again, perhaps I could use a letter to sign off with so you know it’s that person who won’t shut up in your inbox again (I’m too much of a frightened deer to come off of anon just yet). At the same time, if you want to tell me to kindly fuck off, I’d completely get it.

Thanks for making me feel like you’re writing just for me with your writing. I know that you’re not, but thanks anyway. It’s a really wild feeling to read something that feels so perfectly fine-tuned for my brain. I hope to god you’re already a published author.

Anyway, have a great day/night and I’m really truly sorry for the outrageous length of this silly little ask.

— L

no listen you don’t need to apologize at ALL this is so much exactly my feelings on a lot of things that i sat here physically nodding my head the whole time. i get it. Buddy I Get It, me of all people, I REALLY do.

i just tend not to have a good time in general fandom tags and whatnot overall, bad combination of brain ghosts and romance repulsion that just makes that a bad fit, and it just makes the friends i make via whatever means that much more of an absolute treasure to me. especially when, like with this show, it’s moved into my brain completely and taken over and that’s just What’s Going On in here and otherwise it’s a lot of me running in circles and climbing walls absksbsk.

and yeah same if there is One button that always always always trips me it’s “presentations of abuse and abuse victims/survivors in fiction,” im pretty hypersensitive about that. and like i get that it’s My Specific Priority and it’s not gonna be everyone’s or most people’s or whatever narrative it is on the whole but yknow! ill own my bias and i try not to be embarrassed for it. that’s a lot of why i write - the narratives have their own priorities and so do fandoms so im gonna take advantage of the opportunities i have to spend some time with mine.

im really, REALLY glad that my writing’s been meaningful for you! that’s honestly why i do it. because stories like the ones i write have been like, everything to me for a really long time, and a big driving force in getting myself to actually Allow Myself to write them is by going hey, maybe someone else needs to see this too. same story specifically was one i had to push myself to actually release into the world but im very very glad i did and im that much more bolstered to keep going both with it and whatever else there is in my back pocket after this <3

roy is a fantastic, fascinating character and a big part of why he gets my attention and i keep coming back to him is this interesting combination of being a very shut down, reserved person while also being HIGHLY critical of himself and afraid of negatively impacting the people around himself that he’s got influence on. i think about that conversation in the car with phoebe almost as much as the scene with jamie later in that episode when it comes to roy in 2x08. it just feels….. bizarrely static at best and regressive at worst.

i love this alternate version. that’s very fun, and way more in line what what i think roy’s progression to this point would more likely lead to. character interpretations are extremely variable and biased in a million directions but i personally think you’re right on the money and it’s a version of that story that im personally invested in exploring no question. (for what it’s worth, i think you’re gonna enjoy the episode tag im knee deep in writing.)

and yeah im on exactly the same page about 2x08. nobody has to agree with me or whatever but far as im concerned it just….. bizarre and jarring that there were literally no consequences or even blink and you’ll miss it follow up like you mentioned, some hey how’re you holding up, or. Anything. it’s like it didn’t happen, at least as far as jamie and people’s reaction to him is concerned, which is like…. again, this is me and my personal bias speaking but that was an ENORMOUSLY rattling event for everyone there, and just, any kind of recognition that it happened would’ve gone a long way to making that way less disorienting.

also- im so glad you’ve enjoyed my answers and i also apologize if ive missed any!! i am SO bad at remembering to answer things and my inbox gets glitchy sometimes so please please feel free to send something again if you don’t see an answer for a while. id love to hear from you again should you want to chat and the sign off letter is a great idea, i love knowing it’s the same person!!

and for the record, it IS for you. as much as it is for me. i joke around a lot that i write for aros and abuse survivors first and everyone else can read it too so. it is for you, specifically, and it really does mean everything for me to hear that my writing is making it to the people it’s meant for. im not a published author YET but hopefully someday! ive got quite a bit of original work hanging out on my computer and bouncing around in my head thatll ideally see the light of day eventually.

[condorclaw]

How c!Technoblade deals with others’ mental health

(TW: mentions of panic attacks and trauma symptoms)

Just finished the newest Technoblade stream, and something that stood out was Ranboo telling Techno about the voices. More so how Techno reacted to them.

The moment Ranboo tells him about the voices, the two are already in a stressful situation, with Techno's support animal, Steve, in danger. In this panic, the two try to talk to distract themselves from the current situation. Ranboo asks Techno about his voices during that moment, which Techno elaborates on. Ranboo tells Techno about the voice in his own head, trying to connect to him in some way, while letting out his own feelings.

Techno's response during this is asking simple questions and making a few jokes. This could be seen as disrespectful, but it's rather in-line for who Techno is and the current situation.

Techno doesn't do too well with talking to people, and when he does, he makes jokes to try and interact with his peers at least somewhat. He shows more through his actions, and in the moment of him having to hang on to Steve with a rope while a piglin tries to push him, there's not much room for physical acknowledgement. When it comes to what he says, Techno is already balancing Steve's safety and the voices in his head, so his responses won't be as thought out or carefully crafted.

He still knows that Ranboo is telling him something important, and he does care about what Ranboo is saying. When Ranboo says that his voice tells him bad things, but Techno's voices appear to be helpful, Techno responds by telling him that they're just saying "E" at the moment. Techno isn't trying to downgrade Ranboo's experiences at all here, and is rather trying to convey that his voices aren't all that helpful, not wanting Ranboo to feel bad about his own voice.

Techno knows that Ranboo is opening up about something important, and if Techno really didn't care about Ranboo's experiences, he'd tell Ranboo to shut up while they were saving Steve.

Now compare this to another situation where Techno was present: Tommy's frequent panic attacks during exile. More specifically, the ones occurring near Logsteshire and the Final Control Room.

When the two chose to sneak into L'manberg at one point to create a base, Techno shows Tommy a room he found, which turns out to be the Final Control Room, where Tommy had lost his first canon life. Techno wasn't present when the L'manberg Independence war wasn't taking place, so he, himself, didn't know what it was for.

Upon entering, Tommy immediately starts having a panic attack, and Techno tries to ask him what happened in that room. Tommy takes off running, and due to how he normally acts, Techno probably saw it as just another thing he does sometimes. As Tommy ran through the tunnels, Techno repeatedly asked why he was so afraid of the room, only fully realizing what was going on after Tommy said he didn't want to think about it.

Techno followed him, trying to tell Tommy that it was fine, and that he didn't need to talk about it. Tommy then started having conflicting thoughts about Dream again, with Techno trying to direct them towards the "you don't need Dream" area so Tommy could hopefully clear his thoughts more.

Techno's immediate response after Tommy recovering from his panic attack was for the two to head home. Heading in that direction, Techno tried to talk about secret bases to distract Tommy, and the two ended up staying in the tunnels for a little longer after Tommy found a ravine and got distracted, forgetting about what he previously felt like. Techno made some jokes and helped out Tommy with his discovery before they headed home.

The other instance of Techno witnessing one of Tommy's panic attacks was when the duo went looking for some wolves, and ended up going near Logsteshire, which is where Tommy was emotionally and physically abused by Dream.

The journey started off well, where the two continued to banter in their normal way, but the situation started to get worrying when Techno warned Tommy that Dream was online, and Tommy proceeded to talk about how he and Dream were friends, which worried Techno, since Tommy had expressed aggression and hatred for Dream several times.

Techno tries to ask Tommy more about his feelings, but by then, Tommy's trauma is starting to surface as he sees familiar landmarks from Logsteshire. Techno tells Tommy that he can handle the dogs, and tries to distract him by asking Tommy what he knows about the dogs. While Techno is busy with looking up information however, Tommy wanders off to Logsteshire, getting more and more panicked and quiet. Techno tries to ask him where he is and tells Tommy very clearly to come back to where he was.

Tommy sees a forest nearby and insists that he'll conquer his fears and find dogs for Techno. Techno says that he'll go off on his own, and gives Tommy instructions to find dogs, believing that Tommy will be fine since he said he would be.

When Tommy says that his head started spinning, Techno tries to make a joke about it, saying that it's a "promising development", but Tommy takes that literally. Tommy says that he just wants to get bamboo and go home, and Techno talks to him softly, saying that he just needs two dogs, emphasizing that it's not much. Techno meets up with Tommy again, but they get immediately separated as Tommy runs away again, trying to rush past Logsteshire to get to a different forest.

Tommy insists that he's going home, and Techno agrees that they can head back, he just wants to meet up with Tommy so they can go together. Tommy and Techno have a slight argument, where Tommy says Techno isn't the best at comforting him, and Techno says that he wants to meet up with Tommy, implying that he feels it would be bad to let a disoriented Tommy go alone.

Techno mentions that he might have spotted Dream, panicking Tommy who desperately asks where Techno is, and starts rambling about his conflicting thoughts. Techno becomes concerned as Tommy starts talking about how he's alone again, and asks Tommy to describe his surroundings. Tommy proceeds to do that with single words, with Techno trying to ask Tommy as simple questions as he can.

Techno pieces together that something is wrong, and works on trying to get Tommy home, while distracting him with random things and other jokes. As soon as Techno recognizes that Tommy's back in his regular headspace again, the two resume their banter.

The experiences Techno has had with Tommy have been similar in how he handles them. Techno always tries to ask first, and when he realizes that Tommy isn't in the right spot to talk, he tries to make jokes and distract Tommy with his current muddled thoughts. Techno isn't being disrespectful by doing this, and even expresses concern and wanting to get Tommy home when the boy's feelings become too much for Tommy himself to handle. Tommy frequently gets distracted from his own thoughts himself, so Techno finds that joking around helps pull him back to reality, since it's what Tommy likes to do.

When Techno believes that Tommy should do something specific, he always speaks in a clear, short manner, that Tommy can easily understand and reply to in simple ways. Techno himself isn't good with words, so it's easier for him to speak in short sentences when it comes to dealing with serious problems.

Techno could have carried these observations over for when he talks with Ranboo. Ranboo and Tommy are different when it comes to how they express trauma, and Techno is mostly familiar with what Tommy's is like. Ranboo is more direct with his words, while Tommy can't address the situation directly and has to drop cues.

When it comes to using words to comfort others, Techno is mostly familiar with distracting the person from their pain, wanting them to keep stable long enough so he can either get more information about what's going on, or get them to a better spot where they can rest.

Techno deals with the pain of others' in a similar manner to his own. He makes jokes constantly, and keeps moving frequently to keep unwanted voices away from his own thoughts. He's not heartless, and rather has a different way of handling certain issues than many others do.

[genaleah]

ANSWERING WILDCARD QUESTIONS

For the first time in about a year maybe??? Some of these might be even older than that.

Yes, it is Korka! I definitely want her involved, she’s a wonderful character and there is a *lot* of fun paranormal stuff going on in this setting that she can help them research. Also, I’d just love for her and Nelson to become friends!

Thank you! I love him a lot, and it’s fun to picture him interacting with the other guys. They’d all make for some interesting uncle figures, but they might not be that great in terms of role models.

OHOHO. Devilish laugh. That’s a wonderful idea, and a good way to keep him occupied at some point. He’s a great character, but he’s incredibly powerful, and I want these dudes to solve their own problems whenever possible. 

A good question! I don’t remember most of my dreams, but there’s usually a consistent look to the vivid ones. Lots of water, mountains, creeks, and high, winding roads. There are also a lot of buildings that are closely integrated with nature, even though I have almost never seen construction like that. 

I had not, but now I have! Here’s a trailer, for anyone else that missed it:

https://youtu.be/33HXHaaagsw

I really like these new models! I’m looking forward to watching a playthrough when that’s available. Just like with Rhombus of Ruin, I don’t think I’ll be able to play this one myself.

DOUBLE FINE, I WISH TO SPEAK WITH YOU- no, I’m kidding! I think great minds think alike. But I’m really excited to learn more about that character and possibly involve them in this whole au eventually. 

I’ve actually tried to avoid almost any info about Psychonauts 2 so I can go in mostly-blind, and a lot of the characters are vague to me. It’s fun to look forward to, but it’s also a little harrowing because I don’t know how to anticipate for it!

N...NO..... I NEED TO... Honestly those are old enough that it might be a good idea for me to re-make them, as well as the playing cards I made for the mega playlist cover. I think it’d be nice to remake them as vectors... that might make for a nice art stream sometime. I’ll mention publicly if I start doing that, and sharing any of these conceptual Wildcards arts when they’re done. 

And if you’re just curious about what the tarot cards for the other characters are going to be, it’s this:

Eddie: Judgement, The Magician, The Emperor

Manny: Death, Justice, The World

Sam: The Chariot, The Tower, Strength

Max: The Devil, Wheel of Fortune, Joker

Although! I may actually give the Moon card to Max instead of the Devil, and replace the missing card from Nelson’s selection with the High Priestess?  🤔  I’ll decide when I get to it.

Could be! I’ve flip-flopped occasionally on if I want the split-a-cab gang to participate much in the story. I think they deserve a break, and splitting an apartment in New York seems like a good situation for the four of them.

Oh boy, that must be so disorienting for him. The Psychonauts deal with a lot of hippy-dippy weirdness in a seemingly organized way, but it seems like they’re not as paranoid about safety as a real federal organization would be. Not necessarily a good thing, considering one of their camp counselors went AWOL one day, and the head of the Psychonauts got kidnapped the next. They kinda need to get their act together.

Fun fact, in one of the earlier drafts of Chapter 3 I was actually going to make Nelson get scanned by the equivalent of a metal-detector for malevolent thoughts at the door and get really spooked by it, but I decided against it.

YEAH IT’S ON THE LIST

Honestly, a big bulk of the plot in this just regards characters having to face their mental health struggles... via facing it as literal internal demons, unstable powers, etc.  It’s going to take a little while for any of Eddie’s teammates to realize how MUCH he has going on under the surface because he does a pretty good job of hiding it. “Needing to help others above ever helping themselves” is a hard issue to notice if you’re not looking for it. But it’s a guarantee that once they find out he needs help, they’ll give it; whether that’s making sure he’s not working himself too hard, or fighting off demonic cultists. Care comes in many forms.

SHE NEEDS TO REST.... POOR SYBIL (on the upside, they don’t TECHNICALLY work there, so she might be fine most of the time.)

Strong Bad isn’t a Psychonaut! He’s just a vlogger and a petty (psychic) criminal. It’s honestly not very different from canon.

Free Country, USA is a smalltown hotbed of psychic activity. Nearly everyone there has some mild capacity for supernatural powers, but nobody really notices or cares. Strong Bad just pops the tops off of cold ones and.... sometimes alters reality, a tiny bit. But mostly just in regards to media. The cartoons, comics, etc, that he invents and talks about have a tendency to suddenly voip into existence and nobody knows how. I swear, there’s actually a line of him saying something to this effect, but I can’t find it anywhere.  Don’t worry about it! Nobody in town is ever going to do anything truly nefarious with their powers, so it’s not a high priority on the Psychonauts’ radar, just a weird footnote.

The only reason Homestar is an actual agent is because he seems like exactly the kind of guy to sign up for a job like that on accident and then stick with it. And he’s a talented telekinetic! None of his other friends know about his job or notice his absences.

And just for fun, here’s some weird instances of psychic overpowering that happened in the cartoon:

---

(Poor Strong Sad)

I’ve actually answered this one before! BAM  Pretty sure all of it is still accurate.

Nelson: He sees floating sheets of paper containing notes, questions, etc. Anything that he wants to know more about regarding that person. The notes are subject to edits, cross-outs, ripped pages, etc.

Guybrush: He sees the item that the person is carrying that he wants most. As he gets to know people better, he sees them for their useful skills first.

Manny: His view of most living people is not very kind...

The people he’s closest to will eventually look a lot less garish. More like a flattering, camera-ready versions of themselves.

Eddie: Sickass sketch drawings that look like they belong in the margins of a composition book. The illustrations improve as he gets a better picture of where they’d fit in the internal lore of his mental world.

Sam: A lot like Nelson; Sam pictures case files, though his are a bit more in-depth.

Max: Max’s visions of people are highly personal and uncomfortable for those who witness them. He sees Nelson as a puzzle with a piece missing. Guybrush is a ripped up voodoo doll. Manny is a forgotten ofrenda. Eddie is a powder keg with a long, lit fuse. Sam is Sam, but he’s the wrong one.

I also got two questions that were pretty big subjects, or that I didn’t want to repeat, so I’m gonna cover them pretty broadly:

REGARDING [X] CHARACTER OR SERIES INCLUDED IN THE AU

Sure, I support it! I’ve gotten this question a few times in regards to things that I haven’t had time to delve into yet, or I’m not interested in, so I’m not going to include it into the AU myself. But if you want to explore an idea like that, feel free! This AU is pretty dang collaborative.

My main focus is just on the main 6 properties: Psychonauts, Puzzle Agent, Monkey Island, Grim Fandango, Brutal Legend, and Sam & Max.

But my general rule of thumb for “characters that exist somewhere within the background of this story” are any other properties owned by Telltale, Lucasarts, or Double Fine. And considering all of the licensed games that Telltale was getting into before it kicked the bucket, that includes some really weird characters, even up to the Venture Bros. I loved that series, but I’m not really interested in doing anything with them for this story! Partly for my sanity, the canon I’ve picked are already a lot of content to play with. 

ASSORTED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE WILDCARD AU DISCORD

There’s no particular criteria needed to join the discord, and it’s not strictly on a need-to-know basis! Because it’s been a long while since anyone has joined, I've been hesitant about adding new people in... But I‘ve decided to try sending invitations again! Everyone who had asked about it in the past will be getting a ping by me in about a day or so, since I want to double-check if you’re still interested. If you’ve been nervous to ask you can reply to this post or message me privately.

Some things to keep in mind before asking or accepting the invite:

If you’re not a friend or a follower I recognize, I will likely double-check your tumblr along with some other current members before sending the invite. 

Here’s the Rules page, so you know what to expect before you join: 

Be Mindful - Respect other people's boundaries, don't do or say things that would cross the line. If your behavior makes other people feel uncomfortable or unsafe, I will remove you from the chat. In most cases I will try to resolve things with you and offer a chance to do better, but that will depend on the severity of the situation. And if you have any concerns regarding another member of the chat, you can contact me privately.

Health Boundaries - While discussions of mental health do occasionally pop up, do not rely on the chat for help. None of us are equipped to handle serious mental health concerns, and it will only cause distress for everyone. Please seek real help if it is needed! If you rely on people beyond the point that they have asked you to stop, I will remove you from the chat.

NSFW - Generally speaking, try to keep NSFW talk to a minimum. Swearing and humor is fine, but don't get too explicit please! Discussions should usually keep to a PG-13 / occasional R, but no NC-17.

Spoilers & Censorship - Please use the spoiler function to hide story spoilers, as well as discussions and graphic depictions of gore/excessive blood/body horror/severe psychological horror. Include a content warning so that people know what they could potentially be seeing when they click on the censored content. If the spoilered content is the subject of a back-and-forth discussion, please use another warning when you are switching to a different spoilered topic. (Note that these rules were added to the chat later, so be careful when using the search function or back reading.)

The canon series involved with the Wildcard AU are Psychonauts, Puzzle Agent, Monkey Island, Grim Fandango, Brutal Legend, and Sam & Max. Please be mindful of story spoilers!

Channel Organization - Also be mindful of which channel you're in and move a discussion over if need be! That way they don't get too clogged with unrelated info.

Creative Criticism - When it comes to writing, art, or character creation; try to be open to suggestions from others! Nearly all of the creative work in the chat is collaborative, so input from others is important! Creative criticism is not the same as judgement, and is not a personal attack.

Have fun! - Discussions move quickly in this chat! Don't feel bad if you ever need to step back, whether it's because of the speed or a disinterest in whatever current topic we're focusing on. If you ever want to come back, we're happy to have you and can give quick explanations if you feel out of the loop! :thumbsup:

We’re a group of approx. a half dozen to a dozen people, either posting very very quickly in a span of a few hours or barely anything for a few days. We’ve been in an activity uptick lately and there’s about a year and half of back content, too. If it’s hard to keep up on, not that interesting to read through, or you just have a hard time gelling with the group that's already there, there’s no shame in just lurking or dipping out if you need to.

We also talk a lot about Psychonauts OCs, so anticipate that.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 276: Our Turn to Save You

Previously on BnHA: In a refreshing change of pace from the usual “the adults refuse to tell the kids anything” shtick, Deku and Kacchan flew around trying to get Tomura’s attention while refusing to explain jack shit to Endeavor! Deku eventually thought to ask Kacchan why he was getting in on this, and Kacchan launched into a two-page Denial Speech which seemed expressly designed to prime him for losing his quirk any fucking second now! Tomura then showed up and the two of them were all “KJSDLFK” but thankfully Gran dove in to rescue them from dying INSTANTANEOUS HORRIBLE DEATHS, and reminded them that there are practically SIX WHOLE GROWN-UPS left who can definitely still fight Tomura and won’t die at all!! And one of those grown-ups is Aizawa! Who’s getting ready to fight Tomura now! Listen Horikoshi you fucker, when I asked for more Aizawa angst and badassery this ISN’T WHAT I –

Today on BnHA: Tomura is all “THIS QUIRK WON’T STOP ME BECAUSE I CAN’T READ” and sort of shrugs it off and continues to kick ass even though his Decay and AFO powers aren’t working. The pros all try to stop him with Endeavor taking the lead, and because THEY ALL SUCK, APPARENTLY, nothing they do is effective in any way whatsoever! Meanwhile Gran dumps Deku and Kacchan off and is all “YOU’LL BE FINE HERE” which is the most ridiculous thing anyone in this manga has ever said, and then pretty much as soon as he says it at least nine more High Ends (excuse me, NEARLY High Ends) just POP UP OUT OF NOWHERE and are all “RARR” and the heroes are all “oh shit” and Tomura is all “lol yeah I actually had more High Ends this whole time” and Ujiko is all “it’s true!” and, fuck. The chapter ends with Tomura charging in to kill Aizawa only to be intercepted by MY TWO PRECIOUS BABIES, MY DARLING LITTLE HERO HATCHLINGS, and...!! I blame Gran for this.

gotta say, my sense of time is distorted enough as it is these days without chapter leaks coming out A WHOLE ENTIRE DAY EARLY out of nowhere. not that I’m complaining, because I want to see Aizawa kick some ass & immediately lose his fucking quirk as much as anyone, but it is disorienting

anyway time to dive into this chapter which I predict will be titled “everything instantly goes horribly wrong.” I’ve had a lot of time these past two weeks to think about what is going to happen next, and I’m pretty sure I nailed it you guys

so we’re opening with a familiar sight

I like that Horikoshi thinks that helicopters go “chop chop.” well, close enough

anyway, so yet again we have a scene in BnHA of a town in the process of being destroyed by villains while a helicopter whirs (WHIRS, Horikoshi) and chuffs (SOMETIMES THEY CHUFF TOO) anxiously nearby. I wonder if this helicopter is going to fucking disintegrate. that’d be something new

ARE YOU GOING TO DIE, MISTER LIVE REPORTER SIR. OH MAN. OH GOD I’M ANXIOUS

dozens, you guys! there are dozens of them left! not to worry then. the good guys definitely still got this

oh hey it’s that news anchor with the cutely fucked-up backstory of chopping off his own horn so as to more handsomely report the news

oh god don’t tell me this whole thing is going to be broadcast live. that’s all we fucking need right now. I wonder what’s going to throw society into chaos more, the reveal of just how powerful Tomura is now, or the exposure of what the government-mandated child soldiers get to do during their super-educational practical on-the-job training! no coffee-fetching for these kiddos! we’ve got ‘em rolling up their sleeves and getting their hands good and dirty!

oh hey and it looks like this means that All Might will get to watch protege #2 lose his quirk live on TV -- HEY WHAT ARE YOU SERIOUS

BAD BABYSITTER!! MY GOD MAN, I KNOW YOU’RE THE INDULGENT GRANDFATHER TYPE, BUT MAYBE CONSIDER CHANGING THE CHANNEL TO DOC MCSTUFFINS FOR THE TIME BEING??!

also I know this is just a perspective thing probably but lmao his hand on her shoulder is fucking huge. All Might you been working out again

but seriously this is not good for either of them to witness. they don’t need more trauma in their lives! All Might doesn’t need yet another thing to blame himself over! and he has conflicted feelings about Tomura still on top of that which I’m sure isn’t going to make this any easier. ANGST ALL AROUND. EVERYWHERE YOU LOOK, EVERYWHERE YOU GOOOO

MOTHERFUCKER I --

is Mitsuki looking at fucking baby pictures of Kacchan. reliving the memories of the good old days, thinking about how far her baby boy has come and how proud she is. that’s just great you guys. that’s just fucking great. these aren’t even red flags at this point these are red fucking tapestries

(ETA: and this basically goes without saying, but I’m sure the fact that not one but THREE Todorokis are represented in this little montage means that Endeavor and Shouto are also going to be just fine.)

:)

HE’S SO HAPPY just fucking try and tell me he doesn’t have a mental fucking link to Tomura and Deku you guys. this bitch knows exactly what is going down right now and he is LIVING FOR IT. that does it. someone please save my spot in the chapter for me I am going to go take a quick walk to calm down

and of COURSE that’s a fucking lie though, god -- [frantically clicks to next page]

LOL HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS

FUCKING MANUAL IS HERE TO SAVE THE DAY LMAO. YOU CAN ALL FUCKING RELAX NOW. and fuck me, I’m so fucking happy RockLockRock is still alive as well but WHY ARE YOU STANDING RIGHT NEXT TO AIZAWA IN WHAT I LIKE TO CALL THE “CAUTION: YOU WILL GET SHOT” ZONE. swear to god Horikoshi THAT MAN HAS A FAMILY don’t you even think about -- !!

sigh, anyway so then the rest of the page is panels of Gran & The Boys, Endeavor, and Tomura, along with the text “WHICH SIDE IS THE VICTOR”, which is not helping matters any! also the title of the chapter is “Cheating” which I assume is a reference to both the erasure of Tomura’s quirk, and the soon-to-happen permanent removal of Aizawa’s. I’m just an optimist like that

oh hey and Tomura’s sending out some quick orders to his squad as well

and to think this homicidal maniac is in my top ten favorite characters. sob. I do love you kiddo so please don’t take it personally that I have to unequivocally root against you here. maybe if you listened to me once in a while and would even just consider my radical alternate plan of not killing anyone in sight

anyway lol but here everyone including myself thought he was going straight for the bullets and instead he was pulling out his phone. shows what we know. [braces myself for the follow-up panel of him putting the phone away again and THEN reaching for the bullets!!]

meanwhile we’re being introduced to some new sidekick of Endeavor’s who’s probably going to set the record for shortest time in between being introduced and dying horribly. sorry Kido. I’m just jaded

don’t mind me I’m just putting up emotional walls in between myself and any new lovable characters as a means of self-preservation. mmhmm. he can manipulate the trajectory of things. that’s nice. he seems nice. wouldn’t that be a nice quirk for Tomura to steal and then trajector a bullet straight towards Aizawa ffffff

(ETA: watch this space, everyone. Endeavor’s Sidekick Kido. gonna fuck everything up for everyone, mark my words.)

so I can’t help but notice that now that Tomura can’t use his quirk anymore and is helpless, they have all decided to just sit around doing nothing again?

like. far be it from me to openly wonder why they are not immediately knocking him out or setting him on fire again or whatnot. I am just a lowly civilian. it’s not my job to question these things

(ETA: I must learn to be patient.)

also lmao at Manual saying Aizawa’s ankle is “twisted”, similar to how Deku is constantly “twisting” all of his arms and legs all the time. or did he mean “twisted” in the sense that his leg was pretty much literally wrung out like a fucking towel

anyway so Manual is waterbending liquid into Aizawa’s eyes like that’s supposed to help him NOT close them

has Horikoshi ever had water splashed into his fucking eyes. he and I have had very different experiences as to the effects of this apparently

there we go!!

at least someone out here is fucking trying. for a second there I was honestly worried we were going to see a repeat of “oh well he seems dead enough, let’s just leave, see you at the victory party this weekend, X-Less”

LMAO WHAT KIND OF NONSENSE

[GRABS THESE PANELS AND WAVES THEM IN FRONT OF THE UNCONSCIOUS HAWKS] DID YOU HEAR THAT. DO YOU SEE THAT, BOYO. FACTS. BEING WEAK TO FIRE IS, IN FACT, 100 PERCENT A CHOICE. IF YOU HAD JUST DONE MORE PUSH-UPS AND TRAINED HARDER YOU WOULDN’T BE IN THIS SITUATION RIGHT NOW. SMDH. YOU FUCKING WIMP. YOU RECREANT. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED

hooooh man. hokay. whew. has anyone seen my suspension of disbelief. I’m so used to having it on me at all times when I read this manga that I must have let my guard down and now it seems I’ve spaced it out. well we’ll just keep a lookout for it

so now we’re cutting to Ujiko who is gleefully bragging that Tomura’s strength is on par with All Might Prime’s, which is just great. and now he’s also starting this sentence and then just... not... finishing it

that’s fine. you just trail off, then. hang those implications. whatever dude

meanwhile RLR and Manny are helping Aizawa limp away while he awkwardly has to twist his neck around to be able to still keep Tomura in his line of sight. I feel like there was probably a better way for them to do this but whatever

anyway thanks for confirming that Ujiko did make Tomura into a Noumu in addition to giving him AFO, though, Horikoshi! that’s very nice of you to unsink one of my theories like that. appreciate it

and hold up, so it occurs to me that “Being Fireproof” could still be a quirk, but just a mutant-type quirk rather than an activation type, meaning that Erasure would have no effect on it! aha! oh, there’s my suspension of disbelief lol it was in my pocket the whole time!!

anyway so Endeavor and Tomura are tussling but I really wish they’d be more careful because if Tomura is still capable of super strength and super speed then he could propel himself out of Aizawa’s line of sight really easily and I feel like this isn’t really helping

is it just me or do they look like they’re TRYING to jump in between Aizawa and Tomura, like?!?! GUYS

LMAO now Gran is just

SHUP. toss. dusts off hands. well that takes care of that

and apparently he’s under the genuine impression that a mere “now stay put you dumdums” is going to have any effect on these two whatsoever. lol okay. we’ll see

anyways YESSSSS, KACCHAN MEET GRAN, GRAN, KACCHAN

meanwhile Kacchan falls silent as he mentally tries to work out who tf “Toshinori” is lmao. I’M SO CHUFFED ABOUT THIS. YES THAT’S ANOTHER USE OF THE WORD “CHUFFED.” VERY VERSATILE AND REMINISCENT OF HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRLING

and now here’s a convenient map showing how far away Deku and Kacchan are from safety!

thanks for that. that’s so reassuring to have this nifty little visual

OH MY GOD GRAN

DO YOU WANT TO FUCKING DIE?? DOES EVERYONE IN THIS FUCKING ARC HAVE A DEATH WISH. MY GOD

“BUT FAR BE IT FROM ME TO LEAVE WITHOUT ANY OMINOUS FORESHADOWING!!” NO INDEED WE CAN’T HAVE THAT!!!

rather than focus anymore on how goddamn foreboding that is, I would instead like to take this moment to call attention to the fact that Gran apparently knows Bakugou’s name but not Present Mic’s. that’s amazing

sob

what good indeed. imagine if they couldn’t even do that. I imagine that would have some far-reaching consequences which might even be interesting to explore as part of a story

:O

I made the same face as them just now fyi

fucking Schrodinger’s High Ends. they only exist when the plot says it’s convenient for them to exist. maybe they’re like fairies and if you say you don’t believe in them they drop dead. where the fuck did these things actually come from?!

WAY TO DROP THE BOYS OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF NOUMU FUCKING CENTRAL MY GOOD MAN. MAYBE WE SHOULD SCROLL BACK UP AND UPDATE THAT MAP. GOOD JOB LMAO

WHAT THE FUCK

welp. they deleted Tomura’s quirk and then sent the strongest guy they had after him, annnnnnnd he went and beat him anyway in like two fucking seconds. so that’s. ... wowee. ...so do we have a plan b, or...

like, holy shit though?? and can you imagine the kind of psychological impact this is having on everyone watching this live on TV right now?? this is literally the anti-Kamino. holy fucking shit. also did Tomura lose an arm or am I just not understanding this image right?? NOT THAT IT SEEMS TO BE BOTHERING HIM IN THE SLIGHTEST??

(ETA: somehow I missed the fact that he is even calling attention to it lol. “I’ll raise [the other hand] when it’s back.” fucking look at Mr. Transcendent here who’s so powerful that when you tear his arms off all it does is make him more sassy. is he secretly related to Mirko.)

idk guys I really think my original chapter title was better

at least Endeavor isn’t fucking dead just yet. four more pages and you might actually make it out of this chapter alive my good man

blah blah blah flashback to Ujiko explaining that the Noumu could be activated by an electric current flowing through them, and that they’re programmed to move only on Tomura’s orders. you know. just more good news

oh hey but at least these ones are mindless so I guess it’s okay for the kids to kick their asses without feeling too conflicted. it’s just too bad “their strength is higher quality than the others” but you win some, you lose some

OH GOOD, THEY’RE GOING STRAIGHT FOR AIZAWA

I’M SURE THAT MIDORIYA “MY BODY MOVED BEFORE I COULD THINK” IZUKU AND BAKUGOU “I’M THE ONE WHO’LL GET PAYBACK FOR THAT DAY” KATSUKI WILL TAKE THEIR GRANDPA’S SAGE ADVICE AND GO AND HIDE WHILE THEIR TEACHER IS IN DANGER. IT’S NOT LIKE THEY’VE LITERALLY GONE TO SCHOOL FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR EXPLICITLY MAJORING IN NOT DOING THAT. YES THIS IS FINE THIS IS FUCKING FINE AND GREAT

NOW WHAT’S HAPPENING THERE’S LOTS OF RUBBLE FALLING AROUND AND STUFF MOVING AND SOMEONE IS TALKING

OH IT’S HIM

excuse me. EXCUSE ME. no, you are NOT. going to fucking die, Aizawa Shouta. HORIKOSHI KOUHEI!!! YOU’RE UNDER ARREST FOR THE CRIME OF DRAWING THIS FUCKING PANEL. THIS ONE, RIGHT HERE. YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE DOING. HOW DARE YOU. how FUCKING dare you sir

and if anything happens to RLR I SWEAR TO GOD!! you know what?! you know what?!?

STOP IT

[sitting curled up into a little ball with my knees drawn up to my chest, drawing little finger circles on the floor] I see. so he’s not even concerned about himself at all. it’s his two tiny little hero eggs, his problem children, and the fact that if he dies here there won’t be anything preventing Tomura from finding and killing them. ahh. okay. it’s okay. that’s fine

and goddammit what is he pulling out from his belt. everyone is on the same page here, right? Aizawa’s Not Allowed To Die. that was the deal. WHAT HAS THIS ALL BEEN FOR OTHERWISE

(ETA: yeah but he seriously did just pull a knife out of fucking nowhere though like the kid in that fucking vine lmao. APPARENTLY HE’S HAD IT THIS ENTIRE TIME?? “what if I just stabbed him” lulz. based on the way things were trending, I’m willing to bet it would have literally bounced off of Tomura’s chest at this point, but I’ll give him credit for making the effort.)

NOPE NOPE NOPE NO

(ETA: Shinsou being in the bottom corner... ;_; )

is anyone listening to me!??! I’m over here screaming myself fucking hoarse??! AIZAWA ISN’T FUCKING ALLOWED TO DIE??!! HELLO!?!?!

lol well at least RLR didn’t get steamrolled over

well everyone. we’ve reached page 18. one more to go. what are the odds we end with the boys arriving in the ta-da nick of time to defend their teacher. just who is watching over whom

THERE IT IS!!!

OH NO OH GOD AM I CRYING??! YOU HAD TO GO AND PUT THOSE FLASHBACK PANELS IN?? HIM SAVING DEKU AND CO. AT USJ, PLUS THAT ONE TIME HE DEFENDED BAKUGOU DURING HIS MOST VULNERABLE MOMENT IN FRONT OF A NATIONAL AUDIENCE??? “IT’S OUR TURN TO SAVE YOU”???

and they look so determined and desperate?? and the “Aizawa-sensei!” echoing in both their minds?? and meanwhile Aizawa looks fucking horrified though, because of all the... [gestures] you know? the Terrible Danger?? sob??

anyway. I really let this manga do this to me every damn week. let it just have its fucking way with me. at least Horikoshi didn’t end up breaking the law after all. I don’t know if I could continue to support a mangaka who is willing to commit an actual war crime. no touching Aizawa. OKAY?? OKAY

[americas-golden-boy]

Operation Merry and Bright

Summary: Sam Wilson is many things.

Highly trained former United States Air Force pararescue airman, Avenger, and above all else:

Expert matchmaker.

AKA the power of Christmas traditions bringing together Bucky and the girl from down the hall.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Reader

Word Count:  2,161

“Hey, F.R.I.D.A.Y.?”

“Yes, Sergeant Barnes?”

“Bucky.  It’s uh...” he trailed off, pushing a hand through his hair before dropping it to rest on his hip, head hanging slightly as if it’ll hide the wave of embarrassment that he’s feeling from the A.I., “It’s November, right?”

“Yes, sir.  It is November 13, 2017, your name is James Buchanan Barnes, you were born on March 10, 1917, you are in the Avengers Tower—“

“I’m okay, F.R.I.D.A.Y., thank you,” he cut her off, the corners of his lips curling at her reassurance.

Even with the trigger words safely removed from his consciousness along with the rest of HYDRA’s programming, it was still a long road to recovery dealing with the aftermath of his time as the Winter Soldier.  Nightmares were a regular occurrence, his training was always pushing at the back of his mind, and on rare occasions his memories would lapse, leaving him confused and disoriented.

At times like these, F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s programmed response to his mounting distress, if he was alone, was to recite facts, beginning with grounding him in the present and becoming more detailed as she progressed.  The last time he had snapped back into his mind was to her reciting a recipe for plum cobbler, something he had built up the courage to ask her for in preparation for the team dinner around Thanksgiving.

He found it almost sweet that on more than one occasion, such as just now, she did it even when he spoke to her directly, despite the realistic probability that he would recognize her in that state being close to zero.

Even for an A.I., she had enough sass and sarcastic wit to stand on par with her creator, and she still met every random question and whim he had with seemingly unlimited amounts of patience and understanding.  

Which, he supposed, she could really have.

He hadn’t forgotten the date, though.  Or at least he was relatively sure he hadn’t.  He figured it couldn’t hurt to check, but with that simple piece of information, he just found himself terribly, incredibly confused.

Because hanging from the ceiling, right in the middle of the hallway leading from the common area to his suite, was a mistletoe bunch.

Even with Stark’s eccentric party planning at every opportunity, not a single Christmas decoration had made its way to the residential floors yet.  Not on any of the floors, probably, but he hadn’t made any recent visits to the S.I. or R&D sections of the building, both out of a lack of necessity and a personal mission to avoid social interaction when at all possible.

As he shifts his weight to his other leg, arms coming to cross over his chest with a soft huff, he sifts through his recent memories, trying to determine the most likely culprits with a motive to hang up the offending piece of greenery.

“It’s not even Thanksgiving yet, where did they find this thing?” He questions aloud, thankful that no one else is around to see how ridiculous the whole situation is, even before he started talking to empty space, and even more so that F.R.I.D.A.Y. didn’t answer his rhetorical question.

I should take this down, she's in this hall too, it might make her uncomfortable, he thinks idly, moving under the bundle to inspect how it was suspended from the ceiling, muscles stiffening as soon as he fully processes the thought.

Could it be for you?  There’s really no evidence that it’s for him at all when he thinks about it objectively, and he really wouldn’t put it past a few of the other people on the team to hang it up as an excuse to see you flustered, or some setup to an elaborate prank, something he knew you’d been victim to more than once.

Almost all of which were headed by the same person.

“Fucking Wilson,” he grumbles under his breath, spinning on his heel to head to the training room and confront the man in question, before promptly rocking back on his other foot to prevent himself from knocking straight into you.

“Sorry!” You squeaked in surprise at the sudden movement and proximity, hand shooting out to grab his arm in an attempt to steady him if he needed it.

He didn’t, but he wobbled a bit longer than necessary to enjoy the feeling of your hand on the plates of his arm.

While Stark and Banner had made some improvements to the limb that HYDRA gave him until a new, upgraded prosthetic could be completed, he was still limited to the basic sensations of pressure and temperature along the surface.  

It made his heart swell every time you touched his left arm, knowing that you weren’t afraid of it and embraced it as just another part of him.  Despite this, he really wished you had grabbed his right, just so he could enjoy the contact of your skin on his.

“That was my fault, I should have heard you coming,” he managed to get out, the slight lift of your brows and the hint of blush spreading across your cheeks equal parts humorous and sweet, as your wide eyes flitted across his form to make sure he was securely planted before slowly releasing your grip.

Would it be too obvious if I just tipped forward?

“Didn’t know I had what it takes to sneak up on a super-soldier.  What did Sam do?” You questioned, slipping back into your easy banter with a small smile.

“Oh, right. I’m actually not sure if it was him yet but um...” he trailed off, foregoing completing his statement in favor of simply pointing above them.

She quirked a brow at him before tilting her head back and shifting her gaze to the ceiling.  

If her expression before had been humorous, this one was simply priceless.  

The blush erupted with renewed force across her cheeks with all the grace of paint splashed across a canvas, lips parting at the sudden drop of her jaw, eyes blinking owlishly before they shifted to focus on him again.

This time he couldn’t hold back the bark of laughter that came out of him, smacking his left hand over his mouth, the slight sting of the impact a punishment for possibly offending her.

“Is that...mistletoe?” She asked slowly, looking back and forth between him and the bundle.

“Yes.”

“In November?”

“That’s what I said.”

“And you think Sam put it there because...?” She trailed off.

“Well, uh, this hallway is just you, me, and him.  I highly doubt it was put there because of me, and he pranks you all the time.  He just seemed like a logical option,” he explains lamely, realizing how weak his logic is when forced to voice it out loud.

“That makes sense, and it probably was Sam, but it’s uh—“ she starts, peering over her shoulder at the end of the hallway— “it’s not for the reason you think,” she finishes, her voice lowering a bit as she fiddles with the bracelet on her wrist, a habit he noticed she had a tendency to do when she was nervous.

“Okay, well, what do you think is the reason he has to hang it up?” He decides on asking, the direct approach seeming like the quickest and most effective way to find answers to the question literally hanging above his head.

“He— Well we—“ she attempts to answer, eyes darting to look anywhere but his face, “We were talking about the holidays a few days ago, right?  And I really love Christmas, it’s probably my favorite holiday.  So we were exchanging stories, things we like about the season.  At some point I, um, I mentioned that I had never been kissed under the mistletoe, and that it was on my bucket list.  He’s the only person that knows that, I think, so, yeah.  It’s probably because of me.”

By the end of her rant the words are coming out in a rush, and she finally manages to meet his eyes again, looking up at him from beneath her lashes, the soft jingle of her charm bracelet drifting in the space between them.

His brain stops functioning.

Not really, he knows what that feels like, but it’s his turn to look dumbly between her and the bunch as he processes her confession.

It’s probably the most endearing thing he’s ever heard her say, and the warm feeling blooming in his chest creeps up the back of his neck in a way that is in no way unpleasant.

What she told him was also in no way an invitation, and he doesn’t even think he’s worthy of taking away an opportunity like that from her, but it doesn’t stop the image of her body pressed against his from pushing to the front of his mind, and the tingle in his neck turns into a burning electric current, shooting straight down his spine to rest in a roiling boil in his belly.

He realizes he’s still staring at her.

“Bucky?” She asks quietly, looking like she wants to melt right through the floor and he could kick himself for putting that doubt in her head.

“Yes, yeah, right.  I would say that’s sweet of him but uh, I doubt he did it with pure intentions.”

She huffs out a laugh and he feels a bit better for relieving at least a bit of her tension.

“Yeah, well, he’s probably making fun of me for being one of the only people that hasn’t done it.  He thinks it’s mostly for kids,” she concedes with another self-deprecating laugh.

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” he reassures her quickly, stepping closer to place a hand on her upper arm, startling himself with his own sudden movement, smile growing when she relaxes into the contact, “I haven’t either,” he adds on.

Her head snaps up to look at him so fast that he’s momentarily concerned about her neck.

“Really?” She asks incredulously, searching his face like she’ll be able to spot the lie.

“As far as I can remember.  I always spent the Christmas season with Steve and his Ma or my sisters, eating more popcorn than stringing it,” he confirms, chuckling at the memory.

“I thought you were a player in your day,” she teases, gently pulling her lip between her teeth as she grins at him.

“I might’a been,” he concedes, deciding to take the risk and trail his hand down her arm to grab her own, carefully holding it and checking her expression for any sign of discomfort, “but I spent the most wonderful time of the year with the most important people in my life, and if I had a girl I think I really would’a enjoyed the sweet and simple things.”

The smile she gave him nearly took his breath away.  It crinkled the corner of her eyes and shone brightly enough to compete with the star on the top of the Rockefeller Tree.

And in that moment it was just for him.

She slowly reaches up with her free hand and brushes the loose hair behind his ear, palm resting on his cheek with a tender swipe of her thumb.

“Bucky?”

“Mm?” He hums lightly, almost scared to break the moment as he leans into her touch.

“It’s a bit early but, will you kiss me under the mistletoe?”

The warmth in his chest explodes with the strength of a supernova, pulsing heat licking across every inch of him so hot he’s worried he’ll burn her where they’re connected.

He brings her hand to his lips, pressing a feather-light kiss on her knuckles before guiding it to caress his other cheek, resting his own hands on her waist and the small of her back, closing the last bit of space between them with a gentle tug.

“Nothing would make me happier, doll.”

He watches the way her eyes flutter shut, wanting to memorize every second of this moment before letting his own close.

There is no rush, the press of their lips is languid and soft and even better than he could have ever hoped for.  It’s not a kiss of desire, the embrace isn’t hurried and needy, it’s an acknowledgment and acceptance between them and says all of the words they haven’t gotten a chance to express yet.

He’s not sure how much time has passed when they pull apart, but it feels like no time at all and he already wants to sweep her away and continue for as long as she’ll indulge him.

With one last peck on her lips, he presses his forehead to hers, maintaining the contact that he had been yearning for so long.

“We might need to get Sam a fruit basket or something,” she says.

“Maybe. But he can wait till Christmas.”

[red-becca]

Too Many Reds

One last oneshot I wanna share before Revin week. I swear, this is the last one-

Anyway, I originally only had plans to do one with a lot of Kevins. Much like @nunukim-182's art. As seen here.

But then, I got obsessed with an anime with five Reds. Which is Quintessential Quintuplets (Goutobun No Hanayome). Also, I don't just think Red when watching the anime. It is genuinely a good anime that I enjoyed.

That's about it, really. Hope you enjoy this!

---

"Kev~ Kevin Stoley~ Wake up already, please~" A familiar voice could be heard whispering into Kevin's ear. "Come on, Kevin~ Wake up~"

Kevin made small noises as he squirmed, slowly opening his eyes and seeing his redheaded girlfriend give him a look of concern. "Red? What... What's going on? What happened exactly?"

Red sighed in relief, gently pushing the male's hair back. "Oh, thank goodness that you're okay. No need to call an ambulance for you..."

"Well, none of this would have happened anyway if a certain brute of a lady wasn't so rough with him..." A girl who looked exactly like Red suddenly popped into Kevin's vision, the clear distinction being that she had massive black angel wings and a thorny halo floating above her head. Not to mention, a long flowing black dress and really dark makeup that rivaled the goths' makeup.

"Wait, what?" Was all Kevin could say as he stared at the girl with squinted eyes, still feeling disoriented from waking up.

"Hmph, stop acting all high and mighty! Which you are not, by the way!" Another girl who looked like Red showed herself to the male's vision, her differences this time being that she had on a Viking helmet atop her wild unruly hair that had a few baby braids scattered about and a large battle axe strapped behind her.

"Alright, alright... Girls, I think we should all calm down before we end up scaring Kev off again like last time..." You guessed it, yet another Red clone was with them. This one had clothes resembling that of a pirates, with large gold accessories and a huge scar across her face to go along with the look.

"Oh, shut your mouth! You have no right to boss us around like that! You're not that much older than we are!" Viking Red yells at her, huffing and crossing her arms. "Stop acting like you can easily just be the middle man between the five of us!"

"Hmph! As much as I hate agreeing with such a brute like you, you're right!" Dark Angel Red puts her hands on her hips the turns to Pirate Red. "Don't you ever dare boss us around like that again!"

Pirate Red let out a few nervous laughs as she raises her hands in defeat. "I'm sorry if it seemed like I was bossing you around, you two. I just don't like any fighting between us..."

"She is right about one thing, though!" And then, one final Red showed up. She had three tentacle looking aliens wrapped around her along with a clear green visor over her eyes. "Look, Kevin looks really freaked out at us!" The alien points at the male which makes him jump and get even more nervous.

All five Red looks over at him, making him jump again. Viking Red spoke up first and squinted her eyes at him. "And so he does... What the heck, Kev? Why are you looking at us as if you had only just met us? Huh?"

"Because I have just met you!" He yelled out, getting off his girlfriend's lap, if she even was his girlfriend as he was having serious doubts after witnessing to what was right in front of him. "Red! What the fuck?! Why are there like... four more of you?! And who the fuck are you four?!"

"Umm... Kev, there's always been four of me? Hell, you've meet all five of us before..." Normal Red raised a brow at him, giving him a confused look.

Viking Red angrily pouts at his words, her face looking exactly the way Red does whenever she gets angry. "Hmph! Typical of you to forget about us just like that, Stoley..."

Kevin was about to speak up but Pirate Red beat him to it, letting out a few laughs before she spoke. "Well, the stunt you did with him was pretty severe... Maybe it did a number on his noggin there..."

"So, you're saying it's my fault he's like this?! Typical! Always blaming me when something goes wrong with Kevin!" Viking Red huffs, looking away as she crossed her arms.

"There's no point in arguing about him losing his memory now... All we have to do is introduce ourselves to him all over again. That sounds like the most plausible thing to do... What says you, Alien Red?" Normal Red turns to Alien Red who was happily playing and petting with her aliens. "Alien Red?"

"Hmm? Oh! Me!" Alien Red giggles cheekily and rubs the back of her neck then immediately loses the cheery expression. "Well, first off! Call me by my proper title, you peasants! I am a queen by birth!"

"Didn't you technically renounce that title of yours, princess?" Viking Red smirked, glancing over at her before looking away again.

"W-well... Again, I am a queen! And so I did... Because ruling my kingdom became too much to me... But I am still a queen in my heart!" Alien Queen Red gave a proud grin before turning back to Normal Red. "Wait, Red... What was your question again? I forgot..." She giggles shyly and rubbed the back of her neck.

"Typical... Despite being the oldest one here, you are such the airhead..." More giggles could be heard from the alien. "Then again, you got distracted by yet another snarky comment from our dragonslayer who hasn't even slain a dragon herself for years now..."

"Ooh! You just got roasted, girl!" Pirate Red hollered. "And not even by a dragon as you haven't even seen one in ages! Oh! You just got burned again! How does that make you feel, so-called dragonslayer?!"

Dragonslayer Red smirked as she looked down. "Why, just great, really... It gave me the genius thought that if I can't slay a dragon right now, I'll just slay one of you bitches right now!" She grabs her battle axe from behind her back, ready to swing it right to the pirate's neck.

Dark Angel Red sighed as she used some of her dark magic to stop the dragonslayer before she could even get near the pirate. "What is also typical is all four of you acting with literally no class! Like a bunch of children!" She huffs as she lets go of the dragonslayer. "Let's just get the introductions over with already! I'll just do it for us, even!"

She clears her throat before turning to Kevin, giving him a small curtsy. "Greetings, Kevin Stoley. My name is Dark Angel Red... I know it might be pretty obvious with how I look, that is what I'm named. But just to make things clear and all that..." She points to Alien Queen Red.

"Now, you might have heard her name already but I'll still introduce her, either way. Her former Majesty, Alien Queen Rivqah of the planet Cervana. We mostly just call her Alien Queen Red for short."

Alien Queen Red waved at Kevin and he responded with a small wave back, letting out a nervous laugh as he did so.

"Now, here is-" Dragonslayer Red cuts her off, scoffing loudly as she puts her axe back on her back.

"Oh, I'll damn myself to death first before I even think of letting a stuck up bitch like you introduce someone like me..." Dark Angel Red just rolled her eyes in response. "Anyways..." She spits on the ground and crosses her arms before giving Kevin a death glare, making him gulp nervously.

"I'm impressed you managed to forget someone like me... Unlike these whiny girlies..." The other four girls glare at her after she said that. "I have a personality worth remembering..." She proudly said along with a huge grin, a hand on her chest.

"Umm, I think you were supposed to introduce yourself there... Did you forget to?" Alien Queen Red pointed out, making her face go red and the other Reds giggle under their breath.

"I- Uh- Of course not! I was just getting to it and you interrupted me!" She let out another loud huff and crossed her arms again.

"Oh, right! Of course! My mistake, Dragonslayer Red! Go on then!" The alien giggles innocently, a small smile on her face.

"I mean... You fucking ruined my introduction by saying my name there but..." Dragonslayer Red looked over at Kevin and pointed a finger at him. "You heard it, Stoley... The name's Dragonslayer Red and you better not forget it. Got it?"

"G-got it!" Kevin nodded, shakily raising his hand to give a thumbs up.

This, for some strange reason, got the dragonslayer all flustered, making her look away and cover her face with one hand. "D-damnit... Why must you do that?"

"H-huh? D-do what?" The male asked with a confused expression on his face.

"Ugh! Be a nuisance, obviously!" She angrily yelled, growling underneath her breath.

"S-sorry then!" He raised his hands in defeat, this version of Red definitely being his least favorite with how hostile she was to him.

"And there you go again! Such a nuisance!" She huffed, walking away from the small group to clean her axe.

"Uh..." Kevin wanted to approach her and apologize but was scared she would just snap at him again.

"Oh, just ignore Dragonslayer Red, Kev... She's the biggest tsundere between all five of us..." Pirate Red giggled, waving a hand in the air.

"I am not a tsundere!" Dragonslayer Red yelled. "How many times do I have to tell all you girlies that?!"

Pirate Red laughs a bit before turning to Kevin. "Guess it's my turn, hmm? From my get- up, you would assume my name would be something as simple as say... Pirate Red?" Kevin nodded at her question. "Well, wrong! I'm actually Swashbuckler Red! I used to travel far and wide to find booty..." She smirks at Kevin. "Then I found a booty worth staying for~" She finished with a wink.

Normal Red immediately pushes her away before Kevin could say anything more. "I, uh... Hi, Kev... You obviously already know me... I just get called Red... As there's nothing that special about me..." She nervously laughs before clearing her throat. "Anyways..  Kev, after that whole mess, do you remember us now?" Normal Red asked as all five of the girls stood in a line before him.

"Uh... No! Actually, that whole introduction thing didn't help me at all! Look, I didn't hit my head, lose my memory or anything else!" Kevin yelled as he slowly walked back but all five Red simply just walked towards him.

"Hmm... It seems to be that his condition can't be treated by us simply introducing ourselves... I think each of us need to spend more alone time with him and help him remember something about us..." Dark Angel squinted her eyes at him.

"Oh, yes! Sounds the most scientifically accurate way to get better results!" Alien Queen Red happily exclaimed, wrapping her arms around one of his. "I get first dibs on hanging out with him alone!"

"Uh, no..." Normal Red grabbed hold of his other arm. "What makes you have the right to do that? Nothing, right? Therefore, I have the first dibs on getting him alone because-"

"You're his best friend, blah, blah, blah... We know..." Dragonslayer Red groaned and rolled her eyes as she grabbed Kevin by his collar. "That is a shitty excuse, girly. If anything, he should get to know me first seeing as I am the most amazing and cool one between us..."

"Oh, please... You don't even like him. So, why even bother introducing yourself to him, you filthy brute?" Dark Angel Red huffed as she grabbed hold of Kevin's leg.

"W-well..." Dragonslayer Red started getting flustered, shaking her head to get rid of it. "Whatever! What do you care?! This is my life, not yours! I do what I want with it!"

As all the Reds started yelling and fighting over him, Kevin ended up screaming on the top of his lungs. And that was when he woke up from the horrible nightmare he had... Kevin was now back in his bed with a slowly waking up Red beside him.

"Ugh, Kevin... What the heck, sweetie? It's like..." She checks the alarm clock. "3 in the morning... What's with the scream- Ah!" She yelps as the male hugs her. "A hug? Geez, if you wanted to cuddle while we slept, you could have just asked..." She blushed as she hugged back.

"Oh, it's you! It's really you! The one and only you!" He happily exclaimed, hugging her with tears in his eyes.

"Uh, yeah? It is me? And there is only one me? Why are you saying the obvious to me?" She looks down at him with a confused look.

"I..." He chuckled softly as he cuddles up to her. "Okay, this might sound crazy... But I actually ended up having the same nightmare you had a while back..."

Red laughs at this, cuddling him back. "Please... Kevin, we live in South Park... That's the least crazy sounding thing to be said ever..." She kisses the top of his forehead. "But that nightmare made you realize something, right?"

He gave her a nod and a kiss on cheek. "Mhmm, firstly... More than one Red is not Heaven, it is fucking Hell..." Red laughs at him again. "And that... I'm really happy with the one and only Red I have... The perfect Red for me..." He smiled up at her before they went to sleep again.

[realityhelixcreates]

Dance of the Spheres Chapter 4: Venusian Vogue

Chapters: 4/?

Fandom:  Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: PG 13

Warnings: drugging, kidnapping, forced marriage

Characters: Loki(Marvel),

Additional Tags:  Loki Goes Overboard, But When Doesn’t Loki go Overboard, Mature Reader, Disabled Reader, Political Intrigue

Summary:  

Images of broken light Which dance before me like a million eyes They call me on and on across the universe.                   Across the Universe-The Beatles

“I am Loki.”

“I asked for a bride.”

The declarations smashed into you like fists and took your breath with them.

There was a ring on your finger. Silvery, plain, simple. Why hadn't you noticed it before?

This was clearly Loki. Sunken eyes, and onyx hair, and refined bones. Exactly like the pictures. Why hadn't you noticed?

Too many things all at once. Too much. A fearful whine escaped your teeth, as you tugged on the ring. It didn't budge.

“You're supposed to be dead.” You whispered.

His face fell the instant you spoke.

“You know. I sometimes think that myself. Yet somehow I remain. Take it as a reassurance: you will not lose me to battle, or accident. I will never leave you. I suppose that is something that new brides must worry about, especially human ones. You may put that fear to rest.”

“That's not what I'm-” You clamped your mouth shut. You were in a bad position, worse than you'd ever been, maybe. You were completely alone here; you could contact no one for help. You weren't even sure where exactly 'here' was-no one knew where Asgard was located.

You were trapped in a room with a madman. A prince among his own people, who had proven himself capable of the mass murder of humans like you. Yet claiming you were his bride.

No one would come to your aid.

Did anyone even know you were missing?

You glanced at the ring once more. Its twin rested proudly on his own left hand. What choice did you have?

You had to play along. At least until you found some way out of this. Stay on the madman's good side, as much as that was possible.

“Why me?” You asked, fighting down your panic. Just gather information for now. “I'm literally nobody.”

“I don't understand either.” He sat down on the bed, just a little closer to you than arms length. “This was supposed to be a chance at reconciliation. I willingly gave myself up in a symbolic act of unity. Sacrificed my own freedom.”

You side-eyed him hard. Gave up his freedom? In what capacity? He wasn't the one kidnapped and married without any knowledge or choice!

“This isn't an uncommon arrangement.” He continued. “Your species has done this since time immemorial. From kings all the way down to commoners, uniting families, uniting fortunes, uniting entire lands. Surely your...leader...understood what was to be gained. Yes, I did a terrible thing to your people, but this should have forged a new alliance. A promise that not only would I not do such a thing again, but that my formidable prowess would be for your people, rather than against them. Was this not enough? This should have opened the way for trade, for treaties...And you! Why do such a thing to you? One of his own people?”

“Oh, I'm not his.” You said. “I voted against him. I march in protests against his shitty policies. I oppose him in any way I can. I'd say 'maybe that's why', but it really can't be. I'm nowhere near important or influential enough for the government to pay any attention to me. They're too busy trying to kill me through austerity. Or through the cops.”

Loki's face darkened. “I should find that officer and flay him. Make you a bodice of his skin.”

He'd been reaching for your shoulder, but you flinched away.

“Okay see? That right there? That's why people might not want to ally with you.” You pointed out.

“He shouldn't have hurt you.”

“That's true. That doesn't mean you can use my pain as an excuse to rampage on Earth!”

“I shan't!” He protested. “Never again, I promise you that.”

But how good was the promise of government? Politician or hereditary ruler, it was all the same. How good was the word of a murderer? How many promises had he already broken?

“How do you feel?” He asked. “You seem...lively. Whatever you were drugged with, is it having a lasting effect?”

“I'm a little disoriented, but I'm awake.” You said. “The food and water helped.”

“Yes. About that. Ah. Would you like to see your rooms? I've been anticipating your arrival-well, someone's arrival-for some months now, and I've had chambers created that befit your new station.”

The big unknown outside. Beyond this room was nothing but uncertainty. But you would be the first human being to see this new Asgard. You told yourself it was a perk.

“Um...” You mumbled. “My clothes...” You weren't going out there in a flimsy hospital gown, that was for sure.

“Being cleaned and mended.” Loki informed you. “I have a simple gown that I believe should fit you. Here.” Wit a sweeping gesture, he produced a voluminous, forest green garment out of seemingly nowhere.

You scooted away. “How did you do that?” You demanded.

“Magic, of course.” He said. “You...don't know about the magic...?”

You shook your head and took the robe from him. It felt real enough, smooth and soft, with fur trim and pin tucks. This was simple?

“What do you know about me, my dear?” He asked.

“Not much. Just what...turn around!” Sheepishly, he turned his back so you could change. “Just what was on the news. And the approximately three million conspiracy websites that popped up afterwards. You might be shocked by how many people think you were an inside job.”

“A what?”

“That's not even counting all the cults. You and Thor really got the radicalization machine cranking them out. White supremacists, nationalists, doomsday cults...thanks a lot. Not as if we didn't have enough problems cleaning up the mess you left behind.”

“That...was not my intention. Were you...?”

“I was not part of any cults. I was also not part of the celebration of your death, either.”

The news broadcast had interrupted every television, lit up every phone. A tired and battle-worn Thor, looking not one inch the hero the world knew him to be, as he towered over the reporter. He gave only a short statement: His brother Loki was dead, perished in honorable battle, in an effort to protect the galaxy from an ancient enemy.

People had trusted him. They'd seen the destruction that enemy had caused, in their quest to destroy everything. The odd teleportation anomalies in England that had dominated youtube for a long time. The leaves in your bathroom, the foreign plants in the park. Exotic, even alien creatures being spotted.

People threw parties at the news of Loki's demise. You'd gone out, gotten yourself exactly one drink, and then stayed home for the weekend. It didn't seem right, not after seeing Thor so hollowed out. You didn't really get on with celebrating the death of your enemies anyway, only the success of your causes.

“Oh. Well. Thank you.”

“But yeah, all I really know is that you attacked us out of the blue, and brought an army with you. You caused billions in damages and cost hundreds of lives. Thousands more lost everything. The economic blow is still with us, and led to some of the problems I've been marching against. And then you died. Except not, obviously. Was Thor lying to us?”

“No. He truly believed me dead. I did too, until I woke up. So you know nothing of me. I feared that might be the case. I am no warlord, not truly. I am the foremost sorcerer of Asgard. My magic has many applications, one of which is that I am rarely found without what I need.”

“So magic is real?” Why not? Aliens were real. Gods were apparently real.

“Yes, very. When times were...better, I used to tutor younger students. I might go back to doing that, once we are more established. Once we are safe.”

Safe? From what? Was whatever it was that had destroyed Asgard still out there? Thor had said otherwise, before the radio silence, but he had also thought that Loki was dead, and he was wrong about that, so...

“May I look now, dear?”

“Oh...yeah. I'm dressed.” The gown did fit, though mostly because it was a shapeless, oversized thing that was closed around you with ties. Still, it was luxurious, and made you feel like you were actually pretty-as long as no one looked at you too closely. Was this what a princess wore? You shouldn't allow yourself to get too used to it. As soon as you found a way out, you were out.

“Delightful. Even such a simple gown enhances your beauty. Will you come with me, dear? Let me show you our grand achievements.”

You didn't really want to be exposed to the people of Asgard, but this room was no safer than anywhere else right now. Loki hovered, and you stood, and managed a few wobbly steps before you overbalanced. He caught you instantly.

“Don't worry.” He murmured. “I'm here.”

As if that wasn't the problem in the first place.

“So, while you were carrying me off...I mean, when you, uh, received me, did you notice a cane lying around?” You asked. “I had one. Did the guys who brought me give it to you?”

“I'm afraid not.” He said apologetically. “They seemed strangely eager to quit the area.”

“Yeah, well. They had just committed a felony.” You griped. “They probably had orders to disappear. And they probably didn't want to hang around and witness what a warlord was gonna do to me.”

He winced. “I promise you, that's not what I really am.”

“Sorry.”

He held out his arm for you. “I don't have your cane, but I can support you. We will have another cane made for you. There should have been an Artificer and an apprentice Healer in here at some point, to measure you for a new prosthetic.”

“Uh, there were. I, uh, kinda told them to piss off.”

“Ah. I suppose I cannot blame you, now that I know of your situation. But they are here at your service, as is all of Asgard.”

He helped you limp along, somehow maintaining his dignified stride, even as you wobbled along like a penguin. The hallways were as bland and labyrinthine as a human hospital, if somewhat more softly lit. Again the light source was obscured behind thin panes of cloudy crystal, which diffused the light, giving everything a comforting, if slightly mysterious atmosphere, which the general emptiness of the area only enhanced.

There were few people here, but for some reason, you had been placed in a room far within the hospital complex. Maybe they wanted to hide you away, so that no one knew you were here until they were ready to introduce you to Asgard. Or until they were certain you were going to survive. It might cause a scandal if the prince's bride just up and died upon arrival.

Or perhaps it was to protect you. There were plenty of reasons why a human bride might not be accepted by the Asgardian populace; everything from nationalism, to someone wanting to make a bid for that crown themselves.

There were still no windows to be seen, and everything was made of stone, just like in the hospital room. Out here, in the halls and waiting rooms, the desks, chairs, and tables all seemed to be joined to the walls and floor, as if the whole place had been carved from a single, solid piece, like the rock-cut architecture of the fabled city of Petra. Here again were the creamy grays and oranges lining the walls, though a smooth black also made an appearance.

Eventually, you came to what must have been a foyer, with a high ceiling, complex stone mosaics, and huge, gorgeously carved double doors, but still no windows.

“We will be going outside now.” Loki said. “This facility is within the palace complex, and is not far from your special chambers, but we will have to cross a few halls and courtyards. There are plenty of places to sit, so if you need a rest, simply say so.”

He opened the doors for you, and you stepped out into a world of stone.

Everything was stone, stone or metal. Before you was a wide open courtyard, clearly unfinished, but spacious. At regular intervals were stone towers supporting open pillared hallways in a multiple storied, vaguely Roman courtyard style. The towers shot up, and up, and up...you climbed them with your gaze, following them to the heights to which they had to buttress each other with thin struts of stone, higher still, where they joined with an impossibly high ceiling.

There was a roof over the courtyard, so tall that your couldn't fathom how it had been built. Beyond the courtyards stacked walkways-six full stories-you could see the tips of other towers, lined with lights, merging with this high rise ceiling. Was the entire palace built under this massive shelter?

Clearly the sun did not reach into the palace. To offset this, the crystal-paned, inset lights were everywhere, creating complex patterns that mimicked the intricate knotted carvings that chased up the towers and pillars. The corbels glared down at you, fierce masks of bearded men, wolves, dragons and birds, lights in their eyes.

Combined, it was not as bright as sunlight, but not dim either. The softness of the glow made shadows diffuse, made the stone look soft and fake, and even shimmery in places, like the set pieces in eighties fantasy movies. If not for the pain in your bruises, you'd have thought the dreamy atmosphere was just that, and that you were about to wake up from this absurd dream any moment now.

But the pain was there, and denied that simple, hopeful wish. And Loki was there, gently urging you forward like he was a real gentleman, instead of a heinous war criminal. There were a few other people out here as well; walking the courtyards pillared halls, resting on stone benches, carving hollows into the ground.

There was no soil here. All stone. As you crossed the courtyard, you noticed black, and gray, and cloudy crystal inlaid into the ground in a shape reminiscent of a compass rose, decorated with silvery wire knotwork in bird and serpent shapes.

There were troughs and niches being carved into the ground that looked to you like they were meant to be flower beds...eventually. You had seen no dirt here yet, no grass or growing things at all. Maybe once you finally got outside. But for now, it felt as if you had left a building, only to exit into another building, that was in turn, within another building.

It was a bit suffocating.

Loki led you across several courtyards, each with a different pattern inlaid into their bare floor, and through vaulted hallways that still contained no windows. Many of these hallways intersected in large, circular domes, and few of them had any distinctive markings. Soon you were completely lost. With any luck, you would be able to get your hands on some paper, and create a map-otherwise, any escape attempts would be doomed from the word go.

But maybe that was the point.

Your staggering steps echoed down a particularly tall and wide hallway, almost completely devoid of people. You were almost at the end of your physical capabilities, and while there were places to sit, you felt like you must be close to your destination. You really wanted to be in a room whose dimensions you could be certain of. A space you could comprehend.

Loki brought you to a stop in front of a pair of carved wooden doors. As the first piece of architecture you had seen here that was something other than stone, you found them more beautiful than anything you'd seen all day. They were something almost normal, almost like something you would have at home. If you were insanely rich, or your dad was a carpenter or something. They were a warm terra-cotta color, carved with a dizzying array of knotwork, framed with blackened, riveted iron. The handles were iron serpents.

“We imported some things from your homeland. This redwood lumber is one such thing. From what I hear, these trees are emblematic of your country.”

“Er...” How to politely say, 'not really, even though most people who live there do know what a redwood is'. They weren't very important to anyone who didn't live near where they grew. They weren't what you would call 'quintessentially American'. There wasn't anything you could really call that. The place was just too damn big.

“We couldn't bring too much, not yet anyway.” He continued. “It is expensive, unfortunately, and we only have one ship. It can only carry so much, and it takes about three days to transport. Things are moving slowly, but our construction projects are moving along speedily. There's little else to do right now, save build.”

He opened the doors for you, and led you into a fairy tale.

[harryspet]

Guarding Genevieve - h.s.

[Warnings] harry styles x named oc, girl!sub x dominant!possessive!jealous!boy, bodyguard, spanking, handcuffs, angst, mild violence

In which genevieve sneaks away for the evening and her loyal bodyguard finds her and decides to punish her for it.

word count: 1.8k

Gen should've been happy that she was on some beach in a beautiful foreign country and away from the dangerous men who had intentions of hurting and even killing her. Still, she missed her friends and her family back in the states, who she wasn't allowed to contact anymore. For the past month, the only "friend" she's had was Harry.

Harry was a sad excuse for a friend.

He was an attentive man. Ten years working for the special forces of the government will do that to you but how did that teenage girl manage to slip from his hands. He was getting his usual four hours of sleep and, usually, he heard everything that went on in their house but, when he woke up at two in the morning, he felt something was wrong.

He picked up the gun that always sat on his nightstand and focused his hearing. He checked her room and found the form of her body laying between the sheets. He almost brushed off his feeling of worry until he realized that her chest wasn't slowly rising and falling. He walked over and pulled back the comforter, finding an array of pillows instead of a human body.

Fuck, he cursed mentally. Her father wasn't paying him six figures to lose her.

It only took five minutes to search the rest of the house, put on some clothes, tuck his gun in the waistband of his pants and file out of the door. As he expected, the car was still there which meant she had made it out on foot. The little rich girl never learned to drive because she had always had a chauffeur. Thank God she couldn't be far away.

Knowing her, the young lush, she was probably at the nearest bar or club.

"Where are you from?" The blonde-haired boy with sun-kissed skin, a local, asked her. They had been flirting for at least ten minutes and he had bought her a drink, thankfully, because she had no money on her. Harry was in charge of the financials. However, she did have a little black dress that helped convince him.

"Chicago," She lied. She ran away from the man keeping her safe but she wasn't stupid enough to tell a stranger any personal info.

"Never been," He said, "I can imagine why you'd want to get away. The scenery here must be much better."

She nodded, "Yeah," She sipped her bloody mary, "I like the views here very much," She did this thing, gave men this sparkly-eyed look, that would bring men to their knees. Every man except Harry of course. 

The bar was right on the ocean and she was definitely right about the views, "So how long are you going to be in town?"

"Just for the night," She lied again, "I really just wanted to do something fun before I get back to reality, you know?"

"Fun, huh," He bit down on his bottom lip as he thought for a moment, "Let's see, my buddies and I have a place on the water just a few miles from here. We could hang out, have some more privacy if you want."

"I would love some privacy," Her words had a double meaning, of course, because Harry had been invading hers for the past month. They had a few more drinks and laughs before he paid the bar tab and they headed out to his car. 

He was about to take her hand when Gen realized she left her jacket inside, "Hey, stay right here, give me one second," She said before turning around. The jacket was where she left it but, when she returned, her hot date was not where she had left him.

"Dude, who the fuck are you?" Surfer guy cursed, angry that the devil himself was blocking him from getting in the car.

"Harry?" Gen spoke, eyes wide.

Surfer guy turned to face her, "No, it's Hayden, remember?"

She shook her head, "Not you," Harry stepped forward and grabbed onto the surfer guy's shoulder, pushing him roughly into his own car. "Harry, stop!"

"She's not interested, Hayden," He said his name with such distaste, "You can kill yourself drunk driving but she will be staying with me."

He was obviously too disoriented to fight back. Even when he tried to push Harry away, he stumbled. "Fine, keep her, cause I don't fucking want her," Now surfer guy was looking at me with distaste.

She opened her mouth to say something to the surfer guy. She was so close to defending him and screaming at Harry but the words that left his mouth took her back. Maybe she was more trouble than she was worth.

Harry stepped back and she could feel the anger radiating off of him, "Fucking bitch," she was looking down so, at first, she thought those words came from Harry expressing his anger towards her. Turns out that it was Hayden and there were exactly three seconds between him uttering the last syllables to when Harry's fist collided with the surfer guy's face.

"Harry!" She shouted after it all happened so fast. She had never seen him like that. He looked crazed. Surfer guy doubled over and then was kicked in the stomach several times.

When he was done, he grabbed Gen and pulled her away from the scene. I had no doubt that someone from the bar had witnessed the brutal scene and was in the process of calling the authorities.

The car he drove here was still running and the way it was parked suggested that he was in a hurry. Now, she was the one being pushed up against the car. His whole body was pressed into hers and his hand was around her neck. Not enough to cut off her air but enough to scare her. "I don't like killing people, love. It's not my favorite part of my job so, when you put me in situations like that, I get extremely frustrated."

He wasn't yelling but his voice was so loud in her ears and the outside world had gone silent. She gritted her teeth as she tried to push him away. "I hate you!" It only resulted in him grabbing her arm, turning her body around, so now her front was pressed against the metal. "Let go, Harry!"

"Does it seem like I'm trying to be your friend? I'm not the one with ten million on my head. I'm the one trying to keep you safe and keep my job in the process."

She felt him reaching into his pocket for something and she heard the jangling sound of metal before something clicked around her wrist. She was in the tropics but all the heat she was feeling was coming from him. There was a mix of anger and something else that she couldn't recognize.

"Harry," She whines, the metal digging into her wrist, as he forces her into the passenger seat.

"Just be grateful I'm not putting you in the trunk."

"Ugh!" She let out a frustrated breath of air, kicking the door, before finally slouching and accepting her fate. 

She watched from the window as a man exited the bar, he looked like the manager, and she heard Harry as he coolly informed the man that he was a bounty hunter and I was the criminal he was charged with capturing. Apparently, she was a crazed meth head who’d gone on a crime spree. 

The drive back to the house started quietly, the tension thick between them, mainly caused by how hard that Harry was gripping the steering wheel. "I don't understand it," He finally broke the silence, "You were going to sleep with him of all guys? Some random one you just met?"

His question took her back. They had spent the last month together yet this was the first personal question that he had ever asked him, "I wasn't going to sleep with him . . ." Her voice trailed off.

"No? Then what were you going to do? Have a romantic dinner?" He scoffed, the sarcasm dripping from his tone. 

"Why does it matter?" She blurted out, "So what I was going to spend my night with someone else that wasn't you? Are you jealous or something?"

He fucked up. He got quiet and gave Gen the answer that she wasn't expecting. He knew Gen believed he had a cold heart but even he grew attached to the people around them. Especially the ones with beautiful smiles and unbelievable confidence.

"You're jealous!" She displayed a shocked look on her face. If she could cover her mouth right now, she would have. "Oh my God, Harry-" The car skidded to a halt and Harry pulled off to the side of the road.

"You're infuriating, Genevieve!"

"You like me," She was teasing him now and, although she was cute, Harry couldn't stand it.

"It's not that I like you," He corrected her, "It's that I rather you not die."

"You like me, Harry," Now she was grinning wildly.

"Genevieve-"

She interrupted him with her sing-songy words, "Harry likes me-"

It was a risk. Bolder than any risk that he had taken and the man had chosen to pull a trigger multiple times. If it was one thing that he had over her, he could change the situation quickly and he did because, seconds later, he had her bent over the middle console.

"Fine, I like you," He admitted but he had the upper hand, literally, set on her bottom. He lifted her dress and there were no more songs from her. He had taken the words from her and instead of fighting him, she found herself anticipating what was next, "But there are still rules you have to follow. Just because I like you doesn't mean that I will let you disobey me."

She jumped, squealing, as he brought his hand down on her bottom, "You're sensitive. I haven't even hit your bare bottom."

"You – are – not – to – leave – my – sight – little – girl," He punctuated each word with a spank to her bottom, causing the girl to squeal and struggle in her restraints.

She wanted to speak but her voice had disappeared as she grew more embarrassed. "If you act like a spoiled child then I will discipline you like one."

"O-Okay," She stuttered out, scared that he'd deliver one of his exciting smacks again. And with her face so close to his crotch, she didn’t want to risk anything else. "I-I get it–"

She was interrupted by the hardest spank, "And you'll address me as sir, always, and you will speak when you are spoken to. Understand?" She could practically feel the smirk growing on his face.

When she hesitated, he spanked her red bottom until she finally got the words out, "Y-Yes, Sir!"

His hands rubbed over her bottom, which stung at first until it didn't anymore. He seemed to have gotten out all of his frustration because he began to run his hands through her hair, "Things are going to be different from now on, Genevieve, but I think you'll get used to it. You might even enjoy it."

Then he did the worst thing she could've possibly imagined. He felt the crotch of her panties which were completely soaked, even to her surprise. She didn't know how she could be turned on by someone literally hitting her, "No, you'll definitely enjoy it, Genevieve." 

+

This is one-shot but if someone request another part (and gives me an idea of what they want to see) I could make a part two! If you want to read more of my work just check out my #masterlist !

[capricornus-rex]

Hey Hon! I know you’re cramped with requests and the “Old Friend, New Family” story so feel free to do this one whenever you’re ready! No rush! ☺️💖 Cal not knowing the reader has arachnophobia so when they go to Kashyyyk and are attacked by a huge, albino Wyyyschokk, she freaks out? To the point where she’s completely out of her wits, panic mode on FULL, and just scared to death? I have arachnophobia so when I had to play Kashyyyk, it was the worst experience of my life ;////3////;

Honestly, those spiders always give me the creeps and make me shudder ;;A;; Also, so very sorry for not publishing so soon! :( But good thing I just brought home my newly-fixed laptop today!! <3 I hope I can make it up to you and everyone with the fics. I’ll try my best to really keep publishing. Don’t worry, I’m not planning on quitting. Why would I? ;3 I’m having a blast with everyone here!!!

“In the Face of Fear” | Cal Kestis x Reader

Summary: Kashyyyk has its own charms and surprises, but what if one of those said surprises rear its ugly, unpleasant head right in front of you in the form of a spider that’s the size of a boulder?

Tags: Arachnophobia, Wyyyschokk, Matriarch Wyyyschokk, Kashyyyk, Arachnophobic! Reader

Also in AO3

Next: Part 2 | Masterlist

1 of ?

You and Cal finish off the last wave of Stormtroopers.

The partisan informants were right about the Imps getting into the forest to find Tarfful’s home village—which also doubles as a hideout for the Wookiees and a handful of partisans now led by Mari Kosan after Saw had left them.

“Good thing they haven’t come close to the hideout itself,” Cal commented.

“No,” you scoffed a chuckle. “They have a lot to go through besides us.”

Beneath your snarky, roguish facade, you clench your fist as you fight off the chill travelling down your spine when you catch the cluster of hatched Wyyyschokk eggs glued to a tree trunk. Cal spotted your grimace, you’re not taking your eyes off of those empty, shattered shells.

 “You sure can’t stop looking at them,”

“I want to, but… Oh, I don’t know,” you shrugged.

“Come on, let’s get away from them. Those hatchlings could be close,”

“Heeeey!!” you whined, he laughed in response. You playfully tackled him from behind as he walked ahead of you.

It was a tedious trek to the hideout village—but that’s its advantage—both Jedi had to cross paths with a few more creatures before getting to any of the watchtowers or huts. You’re just secretly thankful that you haven’t run into any Wyyyschokks yet—most especially the albino, which happens to be the rarest of its kind.

You tread the forest with more caution than care, your eyes pan from tree-to-tree—searching for signs of eggs and webs—and Cal was quiet about noticing your anxiety. He knew you hated it when your phobia is being pointed out in some way, though he figured you’d like to talk about it just to vent it out.

For someone who isn’t familiar with the terrain of Kashyyyk, it can either be mesmerizing or downright frightening. It goes both ways for you. It becomes the latter when you and Cal stumbled upon a wrong turn due to the labyrinthine layout of the forest. Cal realizes his mistake and attempts to solve it.

“Hey, Cal, are you sure you saw a marker in a tree hollow?”

“I think so,” he replied, with the doubt evident in his voice. “Okay, I really think we took a wrong turn.”

BD-1 politely cut in and flashed the holomap, both Jedi navigated with their eyes, occasionally pointing at patches of land and tracking their would-be path.

“I think we cut across this upper level of the forest, there should be—”

You could’ve sworn you heard something shuffle behind your backs. Your abrupt turning unintentionally cut off Cal in the middle of his explaining.

“[Y/N], you okay?”

“Did you hear that?”

A pause. He listened in on the silence.

A simple rustle of the flora simply heightened your senses—mostly propelled by fear—and then the thing that neither of you noticed before has caught your attention.

“[Y/N], honestly, are you alright?”

You didn’t answer, you kept scanning the area and knew completely well that something isn’t sitting right with you.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you sighed, and stepped forward. “I’m just jumpy, that’s all—”

“[Y/N], BACK AWAY!!!”

Too late! By the time Cal had noticed that you were walking into a literal trap and tried to get you out of it, he was pushed back when the most enormous and most brightly-colored Wyyyschokk both of you have ever seen pounced on you. It had been patiently waiting for either of you to step on its web trap on the ground—and you went right into it. The creature entrapped you with its legs as thick as tree roots, you wriggle helplessly as you couldn’t take your eyes off of its multitude of bulbous, full black eyes, and its mandibles foaming with bile—hungry for flesh—twitch and flick above your bosom.

You let out what ought to be the loudest scream your chords could ever produce; once out of breath, you inhale and exhale rapidly. Your throat goes sore from the shouting that it stings whenever air would enter your windpipe.

The words are dislodged in your throat—you wanted to scream for help but cannot—your voice renders itself absent in your mouth, and only the silence brought upon by the sheer horror of this monster’s overall appearance, and in an uncomfortable closeness with you too.

Cal ran up to it, leapt, and drove his saber into its plump, jiggling hind abdomen. It screeched—a shrill, piercing wail that left a high-pitch noise in the ears—and turned to the offensive against Cal. That was your signal to get up, but the terror had paralyzed you; instead, the entire scuffle with that gigantic Wyyyschokk happened right before your eyes—just like with the eggshells, you cannot look away no matter how much you want to, the longer you look the more materialized your fear becomes. The redhead succeeded in a series of parries to disorient the creature.

“[Y/N], get to the high ground!”

His warning fell on deaf ears. You’re still stuck in staring at the spider, with your back against the wall.

“Bee-beeee, triiiillll!!!”

“I know, BD, I know!”

The little droid warned Cal that you were still frozen stuck in harm’s way, and he needed to think fast to get both of you out of this mess. He cleanly blocked the Wyyyschokk’s incoming wave of attacks, searing its fangs and hairy legs with his lightsaber upon parrying—and while the creature was distracted by its wounds, Cal fished out a flashbomb. He turned his heel to you before the area would be engulfed in bright light in a matter of a split second. He snatched you by the arm, pulled you up, and that woke you from that frozen trance of fear.

“We gotta move!”

The Wyyyschokk thrashed and erratically scampered left and right in search of its prey, you and Cal were making your escape through a pinch in the wall; the enemy tried to catch up but you had already squeezed through the end, its pointed legs jerked as it fitted through the crack, desperately trying to claw either of you just for a scrap of meat.

Life was still flashing before your eyes even after the Wyyyschokk gave up its pursuit. Your heart pounded louder than the Wookiees’ war drums, so much so that your breath cannot keep up with the pulse anymore, and your limbs have returned to its jelly-like state after you crawled your way out of the wall.

He noticed the rapid, sharp breaths that you take. There was also a wetness glossing over the surface of your eyes.

“Are you hurt?”

You couldn’t speak, still shell-shocked by the assault, and slowly shook your head as a response. The tears persist.

“Come on,”

A single touch—gentle and slight—was enough to make you jolt. You were ceaselessly apologetic. For what, exactly? Cal patiently waited for you to calm yourself and eventually helped you. When he thought you were ready, he held out his hand for you.

Slow and steady—Cal took the lead again, and he made sure you were okay along the way. Eventually, you did reach the hideout, but the trauma still hasn’t left your system and you have no idea how to get it out. A partisan was out there to greet you, but the first thing he acknowledges is the horror in your blank stare.

“Is [Y/N] alright?”

“Not really, we just stumbled upon the biggest Wyyyschokk we’ve ever seen,”

“Wait, does this Wyyyschokk happen to have brighter colors than the rest?”

Both Jedi exchanged glances, trying to recall the appearance of the monstrosity, and then the two of you looked at the rebel again; though, it was Cal who did most of the conversing.

“Come to think of it, yeah, it was a bit more vibrant than the others,”

“Oh, well,” the partisan scratched the back of his head, evidently reluctant to break it to you. “I think you guys just met the Matriarch Wyyyschokk.”

Your spine reduced to jelly again, goosebumps pelt your skin as a chill coated your shoulders, your eyes widened so much that they’d almost pop out of your sockets!

“I’m sorry,” you blinked several times, almost comically. “Run that by me again, soldier?”

“The Matriarch Wyyyschokk. Their mother. The mama spider.”

“I know what ‘matriarch’ means! But good gods, those things have a mother?!”

“Well, how do you expect to be so many of them wandering around without one?” the partisan shrugged.

“That’s just spectacular,” you say half-heartedly.

“Just steer clear of its den,”

“Thanks, we’ll remember that!” you whined.

Your hysterics still haven’t died down by the time both of you and Cal waltz through the network of bridges to start a little tour of the village.

[smileforfelix]

ambulance

summary: in which park jisung falls off his skateboard and you're the only one to witness it

words: 1.5k

category: skater boy!jisung x fem!reader, fluff, like one curse word (if you count hell), mild injury (not described really)

a/n: this is like the first thing i’ve written that’s not a drabble so sorry if it’s literally all over the place. it’s inspired by prompt #362 from @creativepromptsforwriting​: 'They only realized they were holding hands the entire time, the moment they had to let go'. so please enjoy!

the harsh led lighting hurts your eyes as the bumpy road jostles your body around in the tiny bench on the side of the ambulance. lying in the middle of the car is a boy that you met approximately 10 minutes ago, and now you're riding with him to the hospital. it still puzzles you why you agreed to go with him when the emt asked, hell, you're still having trouble processing how he ended up in this ambulance in the first place.

. . .

earbuds blasting noah taylor (or whatever music you listen to), distracted by your instagram feed while walking home from school. consequently, the only thing you were aware of was the sidewalk beneath your feet, trying not to fall onto the concrete and hurt yourself. normally, the walk home was uneventful, despite the fact that the route home takes you through the plaza outside the strip mall in town. however, on this particular day, something happened that you would probably never forget. you see, this particular plaza has a lot of benches and fountains and stairs in it that made it difficult to walk through if you didn't know where you were going. nonetheless, after 3 years of taking the route, its safe to say that you no longer really need to pay attention to what's in front of you and just keep walking to get home as fast as possible to greet your cat. and, on this burning hot day, you were to preoccupied to see (and hear) the cute boy with the bleach blonde hair hurtling towards you on his neon orange skate board. 

fortunately for the both of you, your best friend's name popped up on your phone and you stopped to pick up the phone, preventing you from walking the foot forward that would cause you to collide with the boy. regardless, you felt the woosh of air that came with him hurtling past you, and you looked up just in time to see the boy's wheel get caught on the bench that came into his route when he swerved to avoid you, and get thrown off his board and down the short flight of stairs onto the sidewalk. 

looking around, the plaza appeared to be deserted, not unusual since it was 6:00 pm and most kids were at home eating dinner by now, and since you felt like it was kind of your fault he crashed, you hurried down the stairs to make sure he was okay. "hey, are you okay?" you ask while on your way, but no reply comes. thinking he's probably just disoriented you shrug it off, but he hasn't moved at all since he fell off his board. finally reaching him, you shake his shoulders, repeating your question. when still no response comes and he doesn't seem to be waking up or moving, you start panicking. "oh my god, uh what do i do, what do i do?" flows out of your mouth once you start panicking that maybe this, objectively very handsome, boy is not gonna wake up anytime soon, and maybe he's not okay. after all, he did fall down a flight of concrete stairs and probably hit his head somewhere at the bottom. "what's the logical move here? think (y/n), think. who do you call when someone gets hurt? ghostbusters 911!" dialing the 911, you keep your eye on the boy to make sure you know what's going on. "911, what's your emergency?" "there's this boy here, and i think he hit his head pretty hard, and he's really not moving, but there's not much blood and i really don't know what to do" you rush out to the dispatcher. "alright miss, stay calm, everything is going to be okay. can you tell me where you are?" "um yeah, yeah, i can. uh it's the, it's the shopping plaza on st. catherine, on the west side near the stairs in front of the pizza shop." "thank you miss, stay where you are and an ambulance is on it's way to you. it'll be there in about 8 minutes."

not really knowing what else to do while waiting for the ambulance to arrive, you tried shaking him one last time just to make sure he wasn't awake. upon receiving no response, you took out your phone and texted your mom, letting her know of the situation because she was supposed to be home by now. in the middle of her phone call, she heard a groan from next to her and you look over to see the boy open his eyes slowly, rubbing his forehead and looking around. "oh my god, are you okay?" "um actually, what happened?" the boy asked drowsily, still coming to his senses. "uh well, uh so you fell off your skateboard and down the stairs. i guess you hit your head pretty hard at the bottom. i was the only one here, so i called an ambulance. it should be here soon." you answered, letting him know of the situation. "oh. well thanks, i guess. uh but do you know where my board is? it's brand new and my mom is gonna kill me if i broke it." he says with newfound urgency in his voice. "i just told you you were going to get in an ambulance and your response is to make sure that your board is okay?" you exclaimed with surprise. "just stay there and don't move, i'll go get your board. it's up on the plaza." you explained. running up the stairs, you retrieve the orange board which, by some miracle, is in one piece and perfectly functioning. "thanks. what's your name by the way?" he asks. "i'm (y/n)." you reply "jisung. thanks for calling the ambulance and not just leaving me here." he adds while reaching for your left hand to shake. just as you introduce yourselves, the ear-piercing screech of the ambulance's sirens is heard and the ambulance comes into view not ten seconds later. the medics get out and hurry over to you and jisung, ensuring that he's okay and doing some preliminary exams. "it looks like we're gonna have to take you to the hospital do some more tests, just to make sure you don't have a concussion or anything else is wrong." the medic says, directing his words toward jisung. "will you be riding with us to the hospital, miss?" he asks you, raising an eyebrow. "ummm," you hesitate, but after looking at jisung and seeing the scared and pleading look on his face, you give in, deciding that since this accident is kind of your fault in the first place, you should see it through to the end. "yeah, i'll ride along with him." you stay with jisung as he's lifted in a stretcher to make sure nothing happens to his head, and sit by his side in the ambulance.

. . .

and that is how you found yourself here, in an ambulance with a stranger, not really knowing what to do next. you texted your mom the situation and how you ended up riding to the hospital as well. you remembered that you hadn't seen jisung text or call anyone, and just as you were about to ask him, you look up from you own phone to see the medics drilling the poor boy with questions, and you decide that maybe, just maybe, this isn't the right time to ask anyone anything. the bleach blond hair that covered his forehead and a little of his eyes, the cute nose scrunch he would do when the medics got too close, the brown eyes that were looking at you- wait, at you? you lock eyes and raise an eyebrow, causing his eyes to widen and his head to turn away. giggling at the boy, he was cute after all, you go back to scrolling on your phone with your right hand until the ambulance stops and you realize you were at the hospital. you get out of the ambulance alongside jisung, making eye contact with him and nodding to reassure him. "miss? i'm going to take him to his room now." the nurse said at the hospital. confused as to why she was informing you, you just nodded your head, and agreed. "i'm going to need you to let go of his hand, miss." he said, looking at you exasperated. blushing, you realize that since you and jisung have shaken hands waiting for the ambulance, you never let go. you slowly release his hand and watch as they take him down the hall to his room. turning away, you call your mom to tell her that everything is done, and ask if she can come pick you up. when she arrives, among the chaos of the emergency room, you leave the hospital thinking about the cute boy on the orange skateboard that just made a boring wednesday one of the most eventful days of your life.

[soft-sunflower]

Flower of Evil- Episode 7 Thoughts

Okay... so what's up with the whole poor Hyunsoo/Heeseong waking up injured, in pain, disoriented and scared? It's okay. JG pulls it off so well, so I'm totally down with it tbh. Poor man... had no idea where he was, saw a bunch of valuable jewelry, was probably gonna steal it, escape, pawn it so he could get some cash and try to find somewhere to try and live. After all, his f'n roommate just tried to KILL HIM for money! But, for real though... the unfather is freaking me out more and more. WHY is he carrying a tray with bloody towels on it and coming to where HS is...? I'm a little weirded out by that. These unparents give me the willies... Especially the unfather.

Okay, so ummm that lovemaking scene? IT WAS FIRE OK. I mean by kdrama standards, that was WOW and ummm... I'm thinking kdramas might be getting a little bit braver, but omg... here's the thing. It wasn't just sex though... Jiwon STILL loves him. Enough that she wanted all of him. She clung to him. Laced her fingers together to hold onto him and the focus on their wedding rings. This happens a lot. I'm seeing the focus on their wedding rings in many of their scenes often. I feel like this carries some sort of heavy significance. You can tell this is so hard for her, because she's not sure if her husband is a killer or not, but she loves him so openly and genuinely that she even cries while making love to him. She wants him, and she wants a reason to forgive him.

Which brings me to the next part I want to talk about. Where HS is waking up after their night of passion. JW is so tender with him, brushing back his hair. I really truly believe her inner dialogue abut him not having a choice was true. HE HAD NO CHOICE! What could he have done with everyone blaming him and dragging him down and trying to place him in a villainous role he doesn't want?? And there are PLENTY of reasons here that we have yet to talk about to forgive him. This man LOVES you. You are his safe place, for starters. I wonder though, when he wakes up and grabs her hand and looks afraid, if he was having a bad dream. He didn't want to talk about his dream when she asked. It was just a dream. Poor HS. :(

My heart ached when he said "it feels like nothing happened... because nothing changed." He looks so heartbreakingly childlike and desperate, because he wants this to be true. He doesn't want anything to change. He LOVES Jiwon and his daughter. He wants their happy home to continue remaining happy and warm and safe and comfortable, but it's slowly crumbling right before his eyes, and I think deep down, he knows it. The truth will always come out in some way, and as heartbreaking as it is for him, it's happening. His wife is onto him, and at this point, he just might be in denial about this.

The accomplice tape unnerves me. I want to know WHO was on that tape, and it's clear that it's unnerving Hyunsoo also. He could hear the clanging sounds in the background... Sounds from his father's shop? Something else? We saw the cymbol from during his exorcism. Is there a chance that the accomplice could be the village head? I don't know. Village Head, teams up with Do Min Seok, helps aid in his serial killings and then after Min Seok's "suicide" (maybe the village head killed him?) takes in the kids and tries to make himself look like a good man when in reality he is not, and then goes and gets himself killed by Haesu? Or maybe there is a third party involved? Ugh I don't know! I do know this. There's more to the village head than meets the eye and I NEED to know what he's done to these people. Also, the way Haesu reacted to the TV station playing it's bit about the village head's murder? The flashback of the murder weapon, skirt and legs? Hmmmm... REALLY fishy, and I've felt off about that girl for a bit now. I THINK she did it...

Okay, the next part I want to go over is Hyunsoo as a child being questioned by the counselor... that child looks absolutely miserable and depressed. If he were my son, I would've had him in appropriate treatment and not instantly believing he's capable of murder. If you notice him, he looks reluctant to answer... almost as if he were FORCED to say he did these things. Forced, brainwashed, threatened... I don't know. Did he throw the dog in a well? Maybe, maybe not, but to me he does not seem the type to do it. The way he answered "yes" did not come across to me like someone admitting to something they did. I feel like he was forced to say he did these things or wanted to do these things OR something BAD happened enough to cause him severe trauma to the point that he DID want to do these things. SOMETHING terrible happened to him as a child.

HOLY FREAKING UNFATHER!!! You're ANGRY that HS didn't kill the taxi driver!? Just like HS said, I thought you'd be pleased... why are you NOT pleased? WHY are you trying to force this poor man into the role of a murderer when he is NOT a murderer!? WHY are you trying to villainize him?? What breaks my heart during this whole entire scene here is that he's furious that HS didn't murder, so furious to the point that he is now threatening HS's family!? WHY!? Telling him he needs to go? Far away?? What exactly DOES he mean by that? And what does he mean by "I'll take care of your wife and daughter forever." What is "the worst possible outcome" exactly?? This man is more horrifying than anyone I've come across in this show yet. You're a doctor and hospital director, so what the literal HELL!? And HS is afraid of him. You can see it all over his face. All he can do is just agree and say he hears him. The unfather has him underneath his pinky finger and he knows it.

Oh CRAP the unstable ungrandma has Eunha!? That's kinda unsettling... and then when the little one starts work on her studies (it's clear she's a highly intelligent little girl since she's a few grades ahead!) the lady goes batshit and rips up her books? WHY? Does this have something to do with her real son, the real Heeseong? What does she mean by "it'll kill you and your mother?" Poor babygirl Eunha... but at least ungrandma take her out for an egg tart to help her feel better, and she is such a good girl. Ungrandma even tries to gently wipe Eunha's face clean of egg tart. That was... rather unexpected and the first time I've ever seen any form of tenderness from ungrandma/unmother. Hmmm... interesting.

OKAY CAN I JUST SCREAM FOR A MINUTE THAT I KNEW IT!!! I KNEW DO HYUNSOO WAS NOT THE KILLER. I KNEW HE WAS PROTECTING HIS SISTER BECAUSE OF IT. I KNEW SHE KILLED HIM. Of course Moojin still wants to place that blame on Hyunsoo and claims she’s just protecting Hyunsoo. I just had this feeling deep in my gut because something felt off about her. However, do I believe she killed in a psychopathic way? No. I don't. I think that village head was doing something terrible to those kids. I KNEW Hyunsoo was protecting his sister, and I knew that his sister disappearing the way she did was protecting him too. They both know what happened and why she killed him. I have my suspicions why too. I could be wrong, but the sister is far too emotional and sad to be a crazed killer, I feel. I think it was self defense or something along those lines. Could be wrong though! Might shock us all!

Jiwon, I get why you're showing him Hyunsoo's bag. I know you're trying to garner a reaction out of him so you can catch him, but you still don't know the truth of it all. You don't know everything or what all has happened to him. I know you're a detective, but stop trying to catch him and try to understand and learn all of his truths and his past before condemning him for something he hasn't done. Yes, he lied to you about his true name for 14 years, and a past that he wanted to keep buried, but you keep getting more and more proof that he was not a murderer and it's him that's showing you this. 

Instead of trying to shake a reaction out of him, continue to do your digging and investigating in secret. And poor HS... his heart is aching and racing and he's going into a bad anxiety attack over all of this. It's clear this poor man has some serious mental health issues going on. Not just a personality disorder, but anxiety and panic, possibly even depression since it was stated he suffered from it as a child... he's losing his safe place. It's slowly burning and about to crash right before his very eyes... Please, Jiwon. Please keep looking. He's innocent. You've got to learn that he's innocent. If anything, Hyunsoo is the victim overall.

The scene with the younger him and his sister... he was able to tell she's feeling anger. I don't think he completely lacks the ability to tell/feel emotions but that they've been so heavily repressed for so long that he's likely forgotten/been brainwashed into becoming unfeeling or not understanding certain emotions. But you can tell in their scene alone how close he is with his sister, and how much he loved his mother and misses her. Do you think he witnessed their mother being murdered? I wonder... The cage in that basement... did he see his mother in there? Was HE put in there? Did his father "punish" him in the basement? Not making him copy stuff, but go inside that cage and be tortured in there by his father? Haesu was eager to tell him "Just respond okay to whatever dad says" so he didn't have to copy the Myeongsim Bogam. I don't think he copied anything. I think he was taken into the basement and bad stuff happened in there and possibly happened in that cage.

Okay... now to the last scenes of the episode... the scenes where Jiwon wants Hyunsoo to come with her to the crime scene. Revisiting his past. The place where horrible things happened to him that has caued him very obvious and severe trauma, the place where his father performed various serial killings, the place where his mother died, all of it... I love Jiwon. I understand what she's doing. I understand her, but I don't like it. She pushed him FAR too hard here. I know she's desperate to get to the truth, but trying to force "Hyunsoo" out of him was far too painful to watch.

Joongi needs to be HIGHLY praised for his acting here. When they go into the basement, it's clear that he's experienced something truly traumatic in there. You see him really start to lose at as soon as she starts playing that tape recorder. A woman humming, a woman who sounds sad and near tears as Jiwon stated. Was this woman his mother?? Going back a few scenes, we see Hyunsoo reacting when the Chinese restaurant owner removes the earbud from his ear. Threatens to break the man's arm. But when you watch him listening, he seems so at peace, calm, quiet and gently smiling. It's clear this is soothing for him. I really believe that this is the voice of his mother singing to him.

When he asks her why she's playing it, he starts to tremble, his voice is shaking and she just keep pushing and pushing... pushing all of his past traumas, heartbreak, fear, everything onto him and this scene alone confirms 100% that he is suffering from SEVERE PTSD. And yet here he is, trying so hard to keep calm and be polite toward her, telling her he'd like to leave. I understand why she's doing what she's doing, but it was too much. I screamed at the screen "STOP HURTING HIM! HE'S HAD ENOUGH PAIN!" The man is a wreck, he's distraught, he's traumatized, he's in pain, and he needs to leave. He needs to get away because this is too much for him. AND JIWON HAS A GUN AND WAS PLANNING TO SHOOT HIM!? OKAY COPPER WTF!?

And here she is continuously pushing him over the edge, pushing him to the brink. Her inner monologue is even "Do Hyunsoo. Show yourself. Make a choice. What you choose today will determine our future." And yes, his hand was at her throat, but he literally just THREW this man into a pit of reliving his past trauma, terrors, horrors, nightmares and was on the verge of completely BREAKING him! I don't know if he even realized what he was doing!? Was reliving being choked so his hand went for her throat? He's WHIMPERING, he looks about to break down into tears, and you see his hand slip to her shoulder and he is now in a full blown panic attack, cannot breathe (can he also not breathe because he was once choked down there? Abused down there? Tortured down there by his father?)

Jiwon. I love you but goodness... He wasn't trying to kill you, woman so put your damn gun away. You literally just threw him into EVERYTHING that could trigger him in the worst possible way without even realizing the damage you just inflicted all over him... This man is in pain. He's in freaking pain. Can't feel emotions my ass. Yes he most certainly can. And he's PLEADING with her. Saying PLEASE let's go. Please get me out of here, please just save me. Jiwon... yes. You were way too hard on him. There are still so many truths you don't know. If your husband was this violent killer like the world has painted him to be, do you REALLY think he would've reacted in the manner that he did?? I mean REALLY? He looked so pale and sickened on the drive home... My heart aches for him. Absolutely and utterly aches.

ALSO MOOJIN KNOWS WHO THE REAL KILLER IS. What's going to happen next!? Haesu is his first love and she just admitted to killing the village head! And now HS needs MJ's help... will he help? He does seem genuinely sorry, to the point that he's given MJ back the tape as well... Will they team up and find the REAL accomplice and get down to the real truth of it all? Also, Jiwon is tracking Hyunsoo... she knows he's at Moojin's apartment now... Ugh. And what is Jiwon burning!? I'm honestly dying to know.

HS knows his wife is closing in on his truths... and he's getting scared now. Because the loving and happy life that he's known now for the past 10+ years is slowly unraveling and he's about to lose it all. I'm praying he doesn't. I'm praying they stay together. I'm praying she helps him and gets him buttloads of therapy and that he gets to stay in his safe place. Cannot WAIT til tomorrow's episode! I can't believe we're almost over halfway through the show already. It's going too fast, but not finding out enough! Haha. Ready for tomorrow’s ep, but that ending caption of them saying their goodbyes as Baek Heeseong and Cha Jiwon stabbed me in the heart. No. Please don’t break up my couple. It hurts. T_T

[turquoise-stones]

Edge of Insanity Ch. 5: Slow Burn

Yandere!Todoroki x fem!reader

Previous Chapter

A/N: fluff incoming! the yandere is coming soon, dw ;) for now let’s enjoy innocent todoroki while he lasts.

. . .

You hadn't shown up for your last class. Even when Todoroki tried to take his mind off that fact, your seat, which was so glaringly empty, pulled his thoughts back onto you. On any other day, he wouldn't have been so worried. But after the events that transpired today, he felt his fear was well warranted.

The building frustration with himself only made it worse. If only he had decided to follow you and Shinsou earlier today, he could have comforted you, he could have protected you from all those staring eyes, he could have been the first to find you, he c-

He let out a sigh of frustration. He wasn't even there for you during lunch. While his friends managed to find and comfort you, he was on the other side of the school searching, which made him feel like an utter failure.

After lunch, when he saw you again in class, he had promised himself that he wouldn't let you out of his sight. And seeing how relieved you looked when he offered to walk you from class to class was enough to make his heart ache. He relished the feeling of helping you, relished the feeling that he was needed by you.

And the day had passed smoothly, with him staring daggers at anyone who let their gaze linger too long, until just minutes before the last class when you excused yourself to the bathroom, urged him to go ahead without you, and just never returned.

He felt like it was his fault. Did you slip and knock yourself out? Were you locked in a stall? Or at the very worst, did someone attack you? Another drawn-out sigh escaped his lips. Maybe he was overthinking it and you just had a stomach ache.

"Todoroki? Are you alright?" Kirishima whispered on his left. "You're biting your fingernail."

Todoroki nodded absently, a bit irked that Kirishima broke his train of thought. He glanced at the clock. 25 more minutes until class ended. He really just couldn't wait any longer. He raised his hand and waited impatiently for his teacher to call on him.

"Yes? Todoroki?"

"May I use the bathroom?"

His teacher let out a sigh and waved for his go-ahead. Todoroki needed nothing more to bolt out the door. The moment he was out of sight, he whipped out his phone and sent you a quick text. Eyebrows furrowed, he waited impatiently for you to respond, but as the minutes ticked by, he decided that it would be better to just go look for you.

He first checked the bathroom, fighting back a flush of embarrassment as he cracked open the door, averting his eyes in case there were any girls still inside. Luckily there weren't any there to witness his shame. However, no one responded when he called out, which made him all the more concerned. A quick peek under the stalls showed no bodies or feet (which quelled the fear that you had hurt yourself) and he quickly left the bathroom, hoping that no one saw him and assumed that he was nothing more than a shameless pervert.

He wandered the halls, a bit more frantically than before, searching for you. It wasn't likely that you went home, since you always had work after school...

He walked from floor to floor, shoes making loud squeaks that echoed down the empty halls. He peaked at any empty classrooms and courtyards, but you were nowhere to be found. His lips pressed together into a thin line as frustration and restlessness settled in. Walking slowly back to class, he passed a storage cabinet, but froze when he heard the quietest of noises coming from within. Tiptoeing closer, he leaned against the door, half expecting to hear crying or something akin to that, but instead, soft music sounded from within. Something so quiet he must have missed it the first time he looked down this hall. It had to be you.

He knocked quietly, frowning when he heard no reply. He put his hand on the knob, hesitant to open it lest he scare you. But he couldn't just walk away knowing you were in there, especially since people don't just hide in storage cabinets for fun.

Slowly, he creaked the door open. In front of him were rows and rows of dusty textbooks, illuminated by a dim yellow light. There you were, snuggled against a corner of the small space, fast asleep. Your arms were wrapped loosely around bent knees, and your head rested against the bookcase, hair falling over your face and neck. Your phone, which was balanced precariously on the books next to you, was softly playing calm music. Your backpack was haphazardly thrown opposite you. The word 'relief' could not even begin to describe the feeling he felt when he saw you weren't hurt.

He quietly shut the door behind him, the room scarcely giving him enough space to crouch down next to you. He looked at you thoughtfully, not sure what to do now that he had found you. He didn't want to wake you up but it didn't feel right to simply leave. Would it be too much to touch you? The skin that peeked out from under the curtain of hair looked so soft.

He waited a moment longer to see if you would stir, and when you didn't, he brushed a knuckle against your cheek, admiring the soft warmth that radiated off of you. He paused, listening for changes in your breathing, before gently pushing your silky locks behind your shoulder.

Your eyes were still baggy like they were earlier today, but Shouto noted with a pained frown that they were now puffy and wet too. Tears still glistened at the base of your eyelashes. But even in tears, you looked so lovely. He had never been so close to you, but now that he was, he could unabashedly stare at your pretty features. If you were awake, you would undoubtedly cover your face with embarrassment. You even smelled sweet, like shampoo and soap.

He brushed your bangs behind your ear as well, careful to not be rough, lest he disturb you. His heart ached when you parted your lips and let out a quiet sigh. Black dots spotted his vision and he realized that he was holding his breath.

And then it hit him. Maybe it was the oxygen-deprived delirium speaking, but at that moment he realized that his feelings for you were more than just infatuation. Would it be too much to say that he loved you? He had only known you for a month yet you already meant the world to him. He would do anything for you, do anything to make sure your eyes never filled with tears again. So maybe he did love you. It was a terrifying thought.

The soft music came to a stop, and the song changed to something more upbeat. At the sound, your eyes fluttered open. He froze, feeling as if he had been caught doing something unsavory. You blinked in confusion for a second before your eyes widened and you jolted away from him in surprise. Your elbow knocked into the bookcase with a thump, and the impact caused a plume of dust to come raining down on the two of you.

After a long moment, the dust literally settled, and you gasped his name out.

"W-what? Why are you here?" You placed a hand over your racing heart as the adrenaline slowly ebbed off.

"I... you didn't show up to class and I was worried."

You glanced about, embarrassed to be seen in such a pathetic state, and still a bit disoriented. He was very close to you, probably close enough to kiss you if he wanted to. You hurriedly swiped the tears from your eyes, brushed the dust off your head, and grabbed your phone to turn the music off. Upon seeing his concerned texts, you cast him a guilty look.

"I'm sorry for worrying you... and for not replying. But I'm fine so... it's okay."

"Don't apologize. And... don't lie either." He shifted from his crouching position in front of you to sit next to you on the dusty floor. You looked down, saying nothing.

"What happened?"

You were about to say that everything was okay, but he did seem so genuinely concerned that you couldn't bear to just push him away.

"I bumped into Inomata in the bathroom." You felt him stiffen next to you. "And we... talked a bit."

His face came into your field of view and you glanced up at him. His multicolored eyes scanned your face and then your neck, lips tilted down in a frown, looking for any bruises that he may have missed earlier. You realized what he was doing and shook your head.

"No, we didn't fight. She just gave me a lot to think about."

"What did she say?"

"She told me why she hated me. And I guess... well I don't know. I guess I'm just too dense. Our quirks are very similar. She said that I stood in her way."

Todoroki was quiet for a moment, before saying, "She should know that competition breeds better heroes. And by removing her competition," he gave you a pointed look, "she's only taking the easy way out."

You purse your lips and nodded in agreement.

"And you're the one in 1-A, not her."

"Yeah..." you let out a sigh, and Todoroki was disappointed to see that his words didn't have the comforting effect he had hoped they would have. You leaned your head back against the bookcase and closed your eyes.

"Do you hate her?"

You almost snorted out loud. "Todoroki, of course I hate her. But I don't hate her for having the same quirk as me... I hate her for what she's done to me. There's such a thing as healthy rivalry... but then there is cruelty."

He hummed in understanding.

"I didn't just transfer to 1-A because I felt like it. When school started I was actually pretty happy in general studies."

He raised an eyebrow at you. Ever since that day in the cafe, he had suspected that there was a dark underlying reason for your transfer.

"Inomata and I were friends for a while actually." You let out a sad laugh. "Probably 'cause our quirks were alike, you know? So we had the same training and sparred with each other a lot. And when you're around someone so often you just kinda get close to them."

"But I think something like... I'm not sure how to describe it. Something soured? Something went wrong. The more time passed the more bitter she got."

"She was jealous of you." Todoroki offered.

"Jealous of what? I'm just... I'm just trying to get by. Nothing about me is worth being jealous about..."

"You're kinder, for starters."

You cast him a shy smile. He never ceased to be charming. But the smile quickly faded as you recounted the next part of your story.

"Well... her bullying got a lot worse really fast. She would steal things from my desk, harass me in the halls... and injure me during training. Never enough to look suspicious, but always enough to hurt. I think she was trying to get me to drop out. Or at least leave the class."

Todoroki had known that general studies was a miserable experience for you, but the severity of the situations you were explaining, and the exhaustion in your voice was jarring. If it wore you out even to recount the past, it must have been absolutely terrible in the moment. His blood boiled as he imagined the things that happened to you, and he couldn't imagine how things could even get worse.

"But I finally decided that I couldn't take it anymore when... one day she and one of her friends made me destroy my hero suit.

"What?"

"They made me destroy it. With my very own quirk." You repeated, sounding pained. "And they filmed it."

You realized that the small closet was considerably warmer than it was a second ago, and you realized that rage-induced waves of heat had been steadily rolling off Todoroki's left side.

"Her friend... my classmate had a quirk that could control air. They threatened to suffocate me if I didn't do it. It's not the loss of the suit that hurt me so much, I mean I have a new one now... it was the fact that they literally made me destroy my dream of being a hero."

You were starting to tear up again. Were Todoroki not momentarily frozen by his rage, he would have cursed out loud. She threatened you. She hurt you.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" He hissed.

You looked at him, angry. "Would it have helped? Sure, she would have gotten expelled, but she also would have released that video. I thought about it... but if hero agencies saw that video they would never even consider me. The things they made me say..." you shuddered. "They are things I never want anyone to hear me say."

You glanced up at him and flinched at how intense his stare was. You knew his anger was directed at Inomata and not towards you, but the expression on his face could have frozen blood. Upon seeing you twitch away, the concerned expression returned and he reached out to touch your hand.

"I'm sorry that you had to go through that." He said softly. "No one deserves that."

"And... she still has that video. As long as she does, she'll always have power over me. And I'll never be able to escape her. I... I..."

You started crying again, and Todoroki was at a loss. He already had trouble confronting his own emotions, so it went without saying that he had even more trouble with the emotions of others.

"I-I'm sorry I keep crying, I'm just really overwhelmed and everything is t-terrible right now." You hiccupped, trying desperately to stop shaking but the flood of painful memories had all resurfaced.

Todoroki hesitantly touched your arm, and when you didn't move away, he scooted closer to wrap an arm around you.

"Shh... it's okay to cry."

"A-and that post she m-made today..."

"Shh... shh..."

"A-and what she said in the bathroom..."

"I know... I know..."

At his warm touch, you leaned into him, pressing your face against his shoulder and wrapping your arms tightly around his waist. You normally wouldn't be so forward but honestly, you needed to be hugged and comforted so badly.

His other arm wound around your back and he pulled you into his lap to hug you tighter. He rubbed soothing circles as you wet his shoulder with tears.

"There there... you're okay. You're okay. You're a hero and don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise."

"Can you promise me... promise that you'll always believe that?"

"I promise." He murmured.

You squeeze him tight at his words, warm tears starting to soak through his shirt. Todoroki tried to remember back to when his mother would comfort him when he was small, and rocked you the same way she used to.

And the two of you sat like that, quiet and comfortable until your shaking stopped and your breath slowed. His heartbeat, fast yet steady, and his protective embrace soothing beyond measure. Outside, the final bell rang, but even the muffled shuffling of exiting students did nothing to disturb the peace.

For Todoroki, it felt so good to be needed by you, to have you holding on to him like your life depended on it. He had spent his whole life feeling used and unwanted, but you were the one thing he could make better, the one thing pure and worth protecting. He relished this feeling of your soft form in his arms. It felt so correct, as if you were made to fit with him so perfectly.

As the school quieted down once more, it occurred to him that you must have fallen asleep again. Your hands had relaxed and your head was heavy on his shoulder. Feeling a bit braver knowing that you were asleep, he reached up and stroked your hair, sighing at the silky feeling. He was obsessed. Obsessed with the thought of you. You had so much influence over him and you didn't even know it, and it scared him.

You lifted your head off his shoulder for the first time in a long time. Your eyes were tired and your cheeks were flushed. He froze, staring at your flustered expression. His hand was still tangled in your hair and the other settled at your hip. You let out a soft breath and he felt it fan over his lips.

"Shouto..." You mumbled in a sleepy haze.

His heart skipped a beat. You had never called him by his first name before, and it rolled off your tongue effortlessly. He murmured your name back, lifted a hand to brush against your cheek.

Your eyes were so lovely up close, framed by dark lashes, and looking almost multichrome in the light. He leaned in, your noses practically touching...

Abruptly, your eyes snapped open and you jerked back, practically tumbling out of his lap. Your face flamed a brilliant pink as you clapped your hand over your mouth. You didn't mean for his name to slip out like that.

"T-todoroki I-I'm sorry that was so... so..."

He had turned rather pink too, suddenly very shy for having been so close to you just moments before.

"T-thank you so much for comforting me today. I-I need to get to work." You stuttered out hurriedly. You bowed your head adorably at him in gratitude, before rapidly gathering your backpack and books.

"I..." the normally eloquently spoken boy was at a loss for words. He hadn't meant to lean in like that but his body did it before he had even registered the fact.

"I-I..." you tried to say something but your words died on your tongue. "Thank you, again. P-lease... please get home safe."

And with that, you sped out of the closet, a furious blush on your face. A gust of wind ruffled his hair before the door closed and he was alone.

He sat there in the closet, feeling much more empty without you. You had pulled away in the end... but he could have sworn that when he leaned in, you did so too.

Next Chapter

[beauregardlionett]

maybe i, maybe i don’t

AO3 Link

Ever since she had broken Obann's charm over her mind with that peaceful scene on the beach of Nicodranas, Beau had felt an inexplicable pull towards the water, the warm sand, and the calming wash of waves against the surf. Finally being there, with easy access and two days to burn, Beau didn't think twice before packing up a bag and disappearing from the Chateau. Briefly, the monk had considered asking if anyone wanted to tag along, but she knew that this was rare – this downtime. Everyone would spend it how they wished, and Beau felt she had no right to infringe upon their time with a request so selfish.

She figured it was good practice for later – for when they all inevitably split ways and she was left alone again. It was going to be a hard transition; she wouldn't kid herself with that. Almost a year together, and potentially more spread out before them, abruptly being left behind would be massively disorienting. Beau had gotten used to falling asleep squished in between bodies in the hut, or at the very least with Jester sprawled beside her, and waking up to quiet chatter and the smell of whatever Caduceus was whipping up.

Sitting on the beach, perched on her bedroll and staring out over the cresting and dipping whitecaps, entirely alone, Beau kind of hated it all. She hated the silence broken by the sound of waves, hated the chill on either side of her, and hated most of all how her chest ached with loneliness despite the fact that she could easily head back to the group and rectify that hollowness.

But she convinced herself that would be selfish, that she needed the practice in being alone.

The sound of Yasha's harp cut through the raucous silence.

Soothing, fumbling, and familiar, Beau didn't realize her eyes had started to water until she turned her head to look in the direction of the noise. She blinked against the dampness building against her lower lids and pretended it wasn't there. For a brief moment, she considered getting up and following the sound, but then remembered why she was out here, remembered that would be selfish of her to infringe upon Yasha's time alone when they had it so rarely these days.

Forcing her gaze away from the direction of Yasha's playing, Beau instead cast her eyes out across the sea again and made herself be content with letting the sound surround her and took comfort in what she could.

Really, what was she going to do after the Mighty Nein inevitably split up – assuming she survived to see it? She knew that the Cobalt Soul would always be open to her, and there was no way in hell Beau would find her way back to her parents' house, not after everything. She could always just be like Dairon and throw herself into her work, fade into obscurity so deeply that her friends would never hear from her again unless she wanted them to. That...that didn't sound so bad, because she doubted they would actually want anything to do with her once they left her behind. Because when they left, that meant they were done tolerating her bullshit.

It would be selfish to pull them back.

Beau was always selfish – so selfish. Maybe it was time to start fixing that. Maybe they wouldn't leave her behind so abruptly if she did.

"Beau?"

Too late, the monk realized that the sound of the harp had ceased and she hadn't heard the soft hush of sand giving way under Yasha's approach, so lost in her deprecating thoughts. Her head jerked up and around to look at the Aasimar in response, forgetting to dry her eyes and hide the evidence of her tears before she did.

Yasha’s brow furrowed and Beau cursed at herself quietly, moving to wipe her cheeks dry and forced out the fakest sounding laugh she had ever heard. But she tried to forge on anyway, not wanting to confront this right now.

“Sorry…I didn’t hear you coming. I got some salt in my eyes from the spray, y’know?” Maybe Yasha would be gracious enough to accept that bullshit excuse, because honestly if she had fed that to anyone else in the Nein, they would see right through her.

Yasha stayed standing for a few quiet heartbeats before she decidedly sat on the sand next to Beau's bedroll and tugged her harp free from her belt again. Without saying anything, the Aasimar started quietly strumming an aimless tune, her mismatched eyes staring out over the lazy waves ahead of them. This tune was a little less fumbling than the one Beau had borne witness to earlier, a little quieter, but no less soothing. Not entirely sure what to make of this, she turned her gaze back towards the water and shut her eyes, let the sound of the harp interwoven with the crash of waves against the surf completely ensconce her. Beau found it a little easier to breathe after that, a little easier to stop her tears and push away the thoughts that held an iron grip on her chest.

They stayed like that for a while longer, Yasha's aimless tune eventually tapering off to leave them sitting in companionable, easy silence. At some point, Beau opened her eyes and found herself content to just watch the water with Yasha, a silent sentinel at her side. Eventually, though, Beau turned to look at the Aasimar and gave her a quiet, "thank you."

Yasha glanced her way, mismatched eyes soft and understanding – not a hint of judgment to be found.

Thank you for not judging me.

Oh, have you seen me? Who am I to fucking judge?

"Of course, Beau," Yasha all but whispered. "Are you feeling any better?"

Huffing softly at the unintentionally loaded question, Beau glanced away again towards the surf and offered a noncommittal, one-shoulder shrug. Her chest felt a little less tight, but the underlying crux of the problem was still there: her friends would one day leave her and there was nothing she could do to stop them.

"Yeah," Beau lied. Yasha gave her a quiet, significant look, and Beau knew that she would not get away with her lying this time. She offered that same shrug again and sat quietly, feeling the heavy weight of Yasha's eyes on her profile. Deflating under the weight of it after a quiet minute, Beau caved and started talking.

"It's really nothing, Yash. I just keep thinking about what to do when all of this is over, y'know? I guess I'm just stuck on this thought of what do I do after we all part ways. It’s gonna be really lonely, and it’s just something I’m having a hard time rectifying."

"You sound so certain that we won't stick together, or at least keep in touch." Beau looked at Yasha with open surprise and confusion warring in her expression. Did Yasha really think they would stick together in the end? Or was it just wishful thinking?

"I mean, Veth has got her family, and she's always talking about going home to them. Jester misses her mom literally all the time and Caduceus will probably go home eventually – I mean you heard him the other day. He said all that stuff about how he hoped we would all come to him to be put in the ground. He's expecting to go home at some point."

"What about Fjord? Caleb? Me? We don't have homes to go to."

For some reason, that comment made Beau feel like shit. She was here bemoaning and fretting about her future when she did have somewhere to go – and three of her friends had no home at all.

"I uh...shit. I'm sorry, I didn't mean--"

"No, that's not what I meant," Yasha cut her off, expression pinching in the way it usually did when she knew she had been misunderstood. "I just meant that not all of us are trying to leave – because we have no where to go."

That was...not something Beau had thought about before. Blinking quietly for a moment, she then turned bodily towards Yasha and asked, "what would you do – where would you go – if this group dissolved in the next few weeks?"

Seemingly caught off guard by the questions being turned her way, Yasha looked away and seemed to ponder over her answer for a few minutes, quiet and still. Beau took the chance to eagerly soak in Yasha's profile, studying the sharp curve of the Aasimar's nose, the slope of her chin, the way her matted, dreaded hair fell around her shoulders. She was a study in silence and stoicism with a surprisingly soft center that Beau knew she was privileged to bear witness to.

Beau was staring – and she knew she was – but Yasha was beautiful and she couldn't help it.

"I suppose," Yasha started, and Beau twitched out of her reverie at the sudden sound. "I would stay with whoever would have me. Or if no one would, I'd follow the Stormlord's direction."

She turned her gaze back toward Beau and asked, "what about you?"

"Ha...who knows, honestly. The Soul could probably always use me somewhere, and I wouldn't go back to Kamordah even if someone paid me. Honestly, I wouldn't settle down. Not yet."

Yasha nodded, looking contemplative. Beau wondered what was going through her head, but refrained from asking. The pair ended up sitting silently in this way for a while longer, the droning wash of crashing waves to keep their quiet company. Beau could feel the tension near consistently wound into the muscles of her shoulders start to ease and fade. Yasha's companionable quiet, her easy understanding of silence between people being okay, left no room for Beau to worry about saying the wrong thing or not saying the right thing. All she had to do was sit and be, and it was easier than any meditation she had ever attempted.

"You know," Beau started after a long while, the moons hanging in the sky above them now. Her voice sounded so loud after so little words exchanged. "You'd be more than welcome to come with me wherever I ended up."

Yasha took a pause of a moment to look sideways at the monk as a tiny smile crept cautiously at the edges of her lips. Her mismatched eyes were glowing tentatively with fondness tinged in hope. Beau tried to recall if her chest always fluttered like this when Yasha looked at her.

"I'd like that," Yasha agreed softly, her fingers running absently over the taught strings of the harp – not making music but just feeling the length of the strings. "It sounds nice."

Beau grinned – not her usual sharp, dangerous one, but gentle and easy and agreeable. It felt like a promise, sounded like hope for a future she had previously been terrified of. It wouldn't be the Nein, but it would be Yasha, and assuming they both survived long enough to see it, that was a future Beau quite liked the sound of.

With a nod, Beau leaned a little more into where she propped her hands on her bedroll behind her and stared out at the moons hanging over the ocean. The sounds of Nicodranas' night fare were distant and significantly less than the sounds of the day market, but a pleasant hum to their sentry. They lingered for a while longer before Yasha eventually moved, pushing to her feet and tucking her harp away as she dusted the loose sand from her seat. Beau – who had had every intention of spending her two full days alone out on the shores of the city – remained where she was. She knew that it would ache something fierce, but she was ready to watch Yasha walk away. Despite their promise, Beau knew that it was for the future, not for right now.

But the pale woman turned to look down at the monk and raised an eyebrow at her in question, gesturing to Beau's set up.

"Are you coming?" Yasha asked, voice unassuming, leaving it up to Beau to either rise and join her or stay put. It was clear though that there would be no judgment in whatever she decided to do.

Beau thought of the Chateau, of Jester spending the evening tucked into her mother's room, of Veth's sturdy arms encircling her son and husband with brightness to her eyes that Beau rarely saw when they travelled. But she also thought of Caleb's nose tucked into a book, present in the downstairs tavern despite his lack of attention, just for the presence of company. Of Fjord and Caduceus and their excited, idle chatter as they nursed food and drink and knew not to include Caleb in conversation, but kept him company regardless. She thought of Yasha, standing over her now with a cautious expectation, an almost always-willing drinking buddy, a companion who was stalwart and sturdy and consistent even if she wasn't always heard. Beau thought of a quiet promise of a quiet future and made her choice.

"The beach isn't going anywhere." Beau stood and packed up her bedroll and her bag and followed Yasha back towards the winding streets of Nicodranas to the Chateau.

[paradife-loft]

A Smattering of More TGCF Thoughts, Having Finished Book 3

*not exhaustive, because that would be way too much; but still apparently enough rambling to need a cut for length

EVERYTHING IS METAPHYSICAL WORLDBUILDING...... I don’t even know if I have a specific place I’d want to start with this, bc it’s all just deeply fascinating trying to tease out how it all works, but. mmmm delicious crunchy worldbuilding on what heavenly officials (of each court) and ghosts even are, and how spiritual power works! what exactly ascending is, and what role “fate” plays in that, and what even is fate really? what relationship does fate have to social standing in one’s mortal life?

this is my shit. I love to know how it all works. I will poke at all the things.

BLACK. WATER. XUAN. it is probably obvious by now that I am in massive hearteyes with He Xuan?? just. the dramatic flair! the extent of being SO wronged! intense murder aesthetic!  d e d i c a t i o n. power and planning and being utterly terrifying as a trap closing in when the time comes - and an absolute Weirdo antisocial half-person Mess the rest of the time! “I am going to give you all these tests as opportunities to show that you see me, the person your successes came at the very literal physical cost of, and CARE to rectify that horrible injustice. show me that you give a fuck! show me that you’re not just stuck in your pampered myopic little heavenly heads!”

I am a little disturbed by how quickly I’ve built up a whole headcanon persona and POV for He Xuan already despite. not having finished the book yet. :’D what can I say though, intense capacity for violence, plus messy depression/depersonalisation badbrains, plus unstable identity and literally subsuming other beings into yourself, plus hella fucked up relationship with food... This Is Coming For Me Where I Live rn <33

(nom nom transmisogynists make a delicious crunchy snack~)

honestly it’s kind of like, the more intense my feelings & thoughts about a character are, the harder it is for me to really ramble properly about them without more specific prompts.... oops. but just know, I have many He Xuan thoughts. hot damn.

Yin Yu and Quan Yizhen ;____; god, I just have.... a lot of feelings about the way in which Status Issues Fuck Them Up. and about how Yin Yu ends up taking all this blame not because he’s A Bad Person, but also not because he’s Framed Horribly and Is Totally Innocent? he’s just very real, and imperfect, and his personal shortcomings combine with events to create a complete and utter clusterfuck :(

CORPSE RATS CORPSE RATS :D I am enjoying literally everything that’s eaten other spirits in this book honestly. delightfully fucked up favourite “taking on traits of a thing you consume” trope :D

Mount Tong’lu especially, but also just a certain amount of the aesthetic of this book in general, is once again Reminding Me Of Dark Souls. it’s the combo “gain more power by murdering other entities and consuming their souls” / “transformational Final Level specifically called a kiln” thing, I think.

so I guess it’s canon that the Supremes are a “mentally unstable obsessives only” club??? :’D I have a lot of feelings about much-younger-ghost!Hua Cheng just kind of. spending ten years alternately nerding out over trying to learn to read a dead language, and trying to... depict his devotion and somehow express/externalise the very story of who he even is into this empty underground series of caverns? trying to pound it into his head to, like, remember who he is and make SOME part of the world witness to what’s made him, even though (and because) he can’t actually open up about any of that to any other people?

like hmm, certainly I don’t think he’s losing it during the Mount Tong’lu experience as much as, say, certain other individuals might have (*cough*), because he’s not literally taking the essences of other beings into himself, just getting a power-up - but that alone, killing so much and experiencing that kind of metaphysical change, must already be kind of disorienting and weird? especially if you’re functionally alone the whole time?? which is to say, sure, the thousand gods and all the murals might have been a little bit of a monument to Hua Cheng being batshit crazypants for a while, but given the material circumstances of 10 years of isolation/ling nerding/murder, I really cannot blame him. (I would also rather not have other people, certainly not the object of my affection & obsession, get to see those things! that is entirely relatable, not sinister!)

(obligatory “what would a centuries-old sourdough starter from Mount Tong’lu be like“ joke....)

although. that said. I continue! to be not okay! with the extent of Literal Hero Worship happening in this relationship! “if you don’t have anything else to live for, then live for me!” like ok ok it is all very well and good that you said that as a dumbass naive teenage god, and clearly don’t believe in any such thing anymore, but. Hua Cheng! has not gotten over that! he is still very much in that headspace! “oh don’t worry my ashes are in a totally safe place bc if the place where I hid them was destroyed then I would have no reason to live either ~<3″ NO. NO BAD. EXTREMELY BAD, HUA CHENG SIT DOWN RIGHT THIS INSTANT UNTIL I FIND YOU SOMEONE TO TALK YOU THROUGH THIS SHIT.

I just. mmmmmmmnnn. I really enjoy how they interact with one another most of the time! I’m also just... not cool with the level of power disparity in terms of psychological vulnerability to one another, that seems pretty fundamentally baked into the dynamic :/

(it’s funny bc this is the opposite of the panic Mu Qing & Feng Xin were having over Hualian, oops)

actually while I’m being a whole-ass Downer about ships, I will also mention that I do Not get shipping those two..... like “excessive bickering” has never appealed to me in the first place but also. FX seems to genuinely think MQ is a bad person?? and doesn’t understand what his perspective is like in general? perhaps I am simply A Bit Sensitive to people misunderstanding someone and thinking they’re a bad person bc they’re not Nice And Cheerful And Personable, but. eugh, no thank you.

miscellaneous thoughts....

Ling Wen can honestly do as many murders as she feels like, I’m not too broken up about this ultimately :////

Xie Lian’s trauma response panic mode whenever he sees White No-Face! it’s upsetting!

White No-Face is not valid specifically for the reason that I wanted the next ghost king to come out of the kiln to add something cool to the Calamities’ color scheme >:( Give Me A Purple Ghost You Dumb Motherfucker >:(

(actually in part I make fun of him because I am otherwise also terrified of him! he is creepy and horrifying! he seems like substantially less of a Person and more like a Horrible Force of Nature than the other calamities!! also HE WAS LIVING IN THEIR HOUSE *screams*)

(you may notice there is approximately no book 2 content on here and that is.... largely bc I found book 2 very upsetting and unpleasant to read, as “overwhelming futility in the face of world affairs and mass suffering” is in fact my Least favourite emotion to have evoked in fiction. or in real life for that matter. “biological phenomenon wherein foreign entities grow in or on your body” is ALSO a least favourite thing in both fiction & real life too, funnily enough! not actually to the same extent as Futility Forever, but. no thank you.)

there’s definitely more I wanted to talk about at one point or another and then forgot, so, if there’s something you want to hear about in particular, ask me questions!