#truly like. hearing everyone get the lyrics and the timing and the notes right just bc we all care about this so much..gods

[secondstar-acorn]

can’t think of anything to say other than it was everything I could have ever expected and wanted and hoped for. seeing them perform truly is an electric experience and I am so, so grateful I got to be there. I’ve never felt such overflowing joy and love in one room before and that truly is down to what a one-of-a-kind group Starkid is. I’m so happy and a little emotional that it’s over but like it’s sung in days of summer, “don’t wanna see you go but it’s not forever, not forever” ⭐️💜

[atinyniki]

Hihihi<3 I was thinking of Seungmin or Lee know (you can chose) with a idol!Gf that gets hurt during a award show.. maybe falling off a wobbly platform 8ft in the air? (We don’t brear our back). What would his reaction be? I know it’s kinda cruel but Its been on my mind for a week.. if it makes u uncomfy ignore this and forget u ever read it<3 Ty in advance<333

i'll take care of you.

group: stray kids !

pairing: idol!kim seungmin x idol f!reader

genre: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff

warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, crying, reader fractures her ankle, kissing, play fighting, seungmin wants to murder someone, reader falls from a platform, lots of petnames, just rlly cute and fluffy at the end, seungmin is really scared, injuries, established relationships, munhee is a member of y/ns gg.

authors note: ik this was supposed to be more angsty but im literally head over heels for softie seungmin so here you go :P thank you for the ask annonie !! this is also not proofread. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 1344

“hey hey hey, don’t be nervous my love… you’ll do amazing, i know it.”

“i’ve never done this in front of such a crowd before… what if they don’t like me, min?”

“oh baby… they’ll love you, i promise. and if anything happens on stage, your members will be there to back you up, yeah?”

you give him a hug, he always knew how to calm you down in moments like these. you suppose it’s because of his own experiences, especially considering the amount of award shows he’s been at. 

“i love you, seungminnie…”

“i love you too, baby. now go! you don’t wanna miss your cue. i’ll be in the audience, i promise.”

you give him a quick kiss, shooting up from the seat to go meet your members. seungmin leaves too, sitting down at stray kids’ respective table.

“excited?”, jeongin asks from beside him.

“of course i am! i’m so proud of her…”

his eyes stay fixed on the stage, waiting for your performance to start. the lights dim, and he sits up straight. it’s time for your performance.

there’s no point in recording, he knows they’ll have a fancam. right now, he just wants to watch his baby shine. 

and you do. you look absolutely gorgeous on stage, the lights hitting you at the perfect angles. the track starts, and the crowd starts cheering.

so many people, just for five girls performing. the first song is a ballad, something slow to set the mood. it’s one of your favorite songs from the comeback.

though munhee wrote the song due to her own experiences, your voice carries the same amount of emotion hers does, and it makes the lyrics sound so much more authentic.

seungmin watches from the crowd, he truly thinks he might cry. the rest of the boys are in awe too, some members of gidle clasping their hands over their mouths in surprise.

everyone is used to you doing intricate dances with upbeat music, and they’ve truly never been able to appreciate your vocals.

then it hits the climax of the song, ending with a high note you must complete. as scared you are of heights, you know it’s inevitable. the platforms will go up, whether you like it or not.

its a small space that you have to maintain, but you try your best to focus on the song. and now, you have to sing.

you close your eyes, letting out your voice, and it sounds absolutely angelic. and then you open them again once you hear the low whirring of the platforms.

they all go up. 

except for yours.

nonetheless, you continue singing, determined to keep your professionalism throughout the entire bridge. and then the song ends. the platforms finally lower back down, and all of you wait for your cues to leave.

once you see it, you take a step.

you shouldn’t have.

all of a sudden, your platform shoots all the way up. eight feet in the air. before you have time to process, it wobbles side to side and you fall off.

thud.

seungmin stands up instantly, rushing to get backstage. he doesn’t care how many people hes pushed and shoved, but he needs to know that you’re okay.

and then a shrill scream fills the air, and his heart stops. it feels like your entire foot is about to fall off, the pressure from your fall crushing it under your weight.

he continues running as fast as he can, getting backstage before you can even blink. “baby? oh my god…”

you’re still crying from the pain, being set onto a stretcher for your leg. “it hurts…”

“i know baby… i know. you’ll be okay…”

they finally get you onto a comfortable bed, evaluating the damage to your ankle. luckily there’s no blood, the medics assume that it’s broken.

“seungmin… you’re on soon.”

“i’m not performing. jeongin’s filling in for me today.”

“what? but you practiced…”

“please… let me stay. i just want to help you feel better…”

you grab onto his hand, trying your best to reassure him that you’re okay. he doesn’t budge, so you just give up on it. 

“you did amazing, angel.”

“thank you…”

“no, really. i mean it. you kept it incredibly professional out there. plus the song was way outside your comfort zone, it was just amazing to hear you sing like that.”

“seungmin…”

“i’m going to kill whoever fucking did that to you. normally they’re more careful with these things… i should’ve had them double check or something. i’m sorry”

“hey, it’s not your fault. please don’t worry… it’s just my ankle. i’ll be fine, really.”

“but you’re hurt. if we had done a test before to check… maybe you wouldn’t have to be here…”

you smile, grabbing onto his hand and bringing it up to your lips to plant a small kiss over his wrist. “it was just a malfunction. it was out of our control, min.”

he clutches onto your hand tighter, his heart fluttering when he looks at you again. the black lightning-like streaks paint your face, eyes still slightly glossed over and nose red.

you’re so worn down, but you still look beautiful as ever. he prefers you like this, natural and authentic. you still look just as beautiful, but the black streaks have his heart clenching.

suddenly, he gets up, picking you up and moving you to the side a little. he’s extra careful not to apply any pressure to your ankle. he knows you’re in enough pain already.

he sits down in the empty space next to you, pulling your head to his chest. “you promise you’re okay? no discomfort?”

“it hurts of course, but other than that, no.”

“i’m so sorry…”

“baby, it’s really not your fault.”

he rubs up and down your arms, more so to soothe himself rather than you, and you smile up at him. you place a small kiss on the corner of his lips, as far as you can reach without moving your legs.

“i’m okay…”

“i love you, gorgeous.”

“i love you too, minnie.”

the medics finally come back, telling you that it’s only a fracture. you’re lucky you don’t need a cast, but you still need to heal for a little while.

“thank god you’re okay…”

“seungmin—“

“you’re not going anywhere without me for the next couple days, okay? i’ll take care of you, i promise…”

“seungmin, you really don’t have to—“

he cuts you off again.

“but i want to.”

you giggle again, you didn’t think he’d react this way. but of course he was going to be overprotective, what did you expect?

you lean over to plant one more kiss onto his jaw, and he pulls you onto his lap. “seungmin, i think you’re more upset about this than me…”

“of course i’m upset! they hurt my baby…”

“it doesn’t even hurt that bad anymore… im fine. you don’t have to worry about me.”

he pulls you flush against his chest, nuzzling his face into your neck. you giggle at him, a little confused as to why he’s licking you, but you stop once you realize that it’s not saliva.

they’re tears.

“it could have been so much worse…”

you wipe the tears from his face, smiling once you see him clearly again. “why are you crying?”

he sighs lightly, giggling when he realizes how he’s acting. “nothing, i’m just… glad you’re okay.”

you smile at him, holding his hand again and trying to sit up. it doesn’t work of course, seungmins arms are wrapped tightly around your waist.

“let me go!”

you thrash around in his arms, but he only holds onto you tighter, giggling as he watches. 

“seungmin!”, you whine.

“they said you needed rest!”

“that doesn’t mean you have to be completely attached to me!”

he rolls his eyes playfully, planting a kiss onto the top of your head. “actually, thats exactly what it means.”

“i hate you, kim seungmin.”, you grumble. you turn to look at him, scoffing once you see him wink.

“love you too, babe.”

<3

[plutoccult]

OUT OF THE WOODS

pairing: levi ackerman x gender neutral reader

description: you were notorious for following levi’s every order without hesitation. it was practically unbearable for him, but the one time you disobey him is when he is eternally grateful.

word count: 2.8k

also available to read on my ao3 here

author’s note: this is something i’ve never done before aka write for levi! i’m hoping i haven’t strayed too far from his character, but it’s worth trying something new. i must admit, this is a little messy and i’m quite iffy about it, but i at least tried my best. i almost named this “the monsters turned out to be just trees” because i 1. love taylor swift and 2. thought those lyrics captured this almost perfectly, but i decided it was too long and just went with the song title those lyrics are from. this is something entirely new and never before posted anywhere else, but it will also be shared on ao3 as everyone has their preferences on where they like to read. as always, i hope you enjoy <3

you always obeyed levi’s every order, and god, he hated it.

“yes, captain.” you’d say. “right away, captain.” was another one of your go-to phrases. you could just… talk to him? like a normal human being? yes, he was your captain, but levi craved a normal conversation with you.

oh, wait. why did he want that so badly? why did he want to hear your voice say things other than replying to his commands for you and the squad? it’s not like he liked you. no, no! he couldn’t stand you. that’s what this was. right?

levi was particularly known for only listening to commander erwin’s orders and no one else’s, but he didn’t see himself of such importance. it wouldn’t kill you to protest a little bit for once. he even tested your obedience by demanding you glue a broken vase back together. you then proceeded to spend hours restoring it to its former glory. he was surely impressed, but at the same time, he couldn’t believe you actually did it. dare stubborn ol’ levi ever admit it, but he found it kind of cute.

when it came down to the 57th exterior scouting mission, your final order was simple; retreat back to your horses. things didn’t exactly go as hoped, and while the scouts learned something new that day, there was still so much work to do. you wished for everyone’s sake that one day you all could share a proper victory, but it didn’t seem possible just yet with something as stubborn as the female titan.

you and the rest of levi’s squad did as told, but it all went by the wayside when gunther was attacked out of the blue by a figure hidden under the disguise of your scout gear, their green hood concealing their face. there was no time to go along with the plan, now was time to fight back. the squad couldn’t let whoever killed their comrade get away.

as you all attempted to attack, the disguised assailant transformed in front of your very eyes into the female titan you all failed to successfully capture before. now this truly meant war, but the squad was simply no match for this monster.

it all seemed to happen in the blink of an eye. you lost your squad members one after another. you were the last one remaining, you knew this was it. this was your time to die, wasn’t it? part of you always thought it would end in the middle of battle, but not like this. this couldn’t be the end. you didn’t want it to be.

your brain struggled to catch up with everything happening so fast and hitting you all at once. it was impossible to think straight, to get your head together and fight properly. but it was also impossible to realize eren was turning into his titan form until it was too late. the impact of his transformation knocked you straight into a tree, leaving you unconscious as he avenged your fallen squad members, all while your captain had yet to head to the scene of the crime.

levi immediately knew something was wrong the second he saw the sudden glow of eren’s transformation from afar. of course there was something more to this mission. he had to get there quick before it could possibly get any worse, but his idea of “any worse” had already become true; his squad was gone.

he couldn’t do anything to stop eren just yet, levi knew that. this fight between two titan shifters was to be expected. if only the hothead wasn’t so blinded by rage. levi knew better than to let emotions get to the best of him, no matter how much it hurt seeing his squad like this, dying under his wing.

his eyes scanned the states of everyone. gunther, eld, petra, oluo, and then… you. you, who laid there motionless. the life taken out of you, or so levi thought. he couldn’t let this affect him. levi kept all emotions hidden, tucked and buried in deep where no one could find them, no one except the one person who was capable of bringing them out.

“captain…”

huh?! was his mind playing tricks on him? who dared to deceive his ears? it couldn’t be real. it was nothing. nothing at all. you were dead, levi was sure of it, just like the rest of the squad. he was left alone once again, seemingly cursed with this fate from the day he was born.

but then you let out a cough, blood coming out of your mouth and splattering onto the grass. my god, it wasn’t some sick joke from his brain. you miraculously were alive, and levi was too stubborn to let you die out.

he immediately rushed over to you and flipped you off your side so you laid on your back. you breathed heavily and coughed violently, muttering out weak apologies as blood stained your hands, but levi didn’t care. he’d stain himself over and over for your sake.

“you disobeyed orders.” levi said, trying his best to force himself to stay his usual coldhearted self, but it was a losing battle, just like today’s mission. he placed a hand on your cheek, his eyes once filled with anger now becoming soft. “you disobeyed me.”

you could’ve sworn the sight in front of you was like seeing heaven. the impact from earlier made your memories quite hazy, and while you knew you weren’t dead, you sure wouldn’t hate it if this was it. levi’s head blocking the sun made him look like an angel sent from the very land itself, and it was pure bliss.

you closed your eyes with a smile on your face, unbeknownst to you what had truly occurred. to your captain, it seemed like you had left him for good this time, but when he pressed his ear against your chest, he felt the rhythm of your heart as if it were a symphony.

levi couldn’t stand to leave you like this. he had to make sure you got to safety and were treated right away. even if it took you god knows how long to recover, it didn’t matter. but with the female titan trying to take eren alive, he had to remember why he was here in the first place and attempt to clean up the mess the scouts created. you were able to hold out for a little while longer by some sort of miracle, and when levi was able to capture eren back with the help of mikasa, he took you back to where you belonged; with him and the scouts.

by the time you returned to base, you were fast asleep, worn out from the mission. as there wasn’t enough room for all those who were injured, levi took matters into his own hands and tended to your wounds himself, even giving you his bed as he had a much bigger room and it wasn’t like he slept that much anyway. it seemed almost wrong and unprofessional to do so, but when it came to you, he couldn’t help but be a little selfish. it’s what a good captain would do anyway, right?

after what felt like ages, you finally woke up, your mind struggling to remember everything from yesterday. you grew confused as you found yourself in what wasn’t your room, and it became even more puzzling as you saw your captain sitting in a chair next to the bed waiting for you to wake up.

the look of impatience and worry was all you could read from his face and body language. his arms crossed, index finger tapping repeatedly like a drum on his bicep. he was looking away from you, watching the wind blow on the trees outside. levi had been using that view to pass the time and keep himself calm, but it didn’t really help much. only the sound of your voice was medicine to him.

“captain?”

levi lightly jumped in his seat and turned to see your face. you had been bandaged up, not a single wound left dirty. you were also quite bruised, and you immediately winced when you tried to adjust the way you sat. you couldn’t help but wonder what happened to you. if only you hadn’t hit your head so bad.

“you’re awake.” he said plainly. he didn’t want to show too much enthusiasm and freak you out, but on the inside, levi was so glad to see you were okay. the look of confusion on your face made him worry, and he felt the need to overshare and explain what was going on. “uh, this is my room. i took care of you since there wasn’t enough help.”

“oh?” you furrow your eyebrows. “what… what happened?”

“i think i could ask you the same thing, y/n.” levi replied. he had been waiting all this time to hear the truth of what happened. you saw what had happened to your fellow squad members, but with the way you lost consciousness, you had a hard time remembering it all. you could only draw blanks, and you felt as if you disappointed your captain.

“i’m… not sure. i don’t remember. i’m sorry.” you frown.

“i figured.” he sighed. he couldn’t get too mad, but part of him longed for an explanation so he could know where everything went wrong.

“where is everyone? surely petra must have helped you with this, right?” you ask, the question paining levi without you knowing a thing. “you couldn’t have done all of this by yourself.”

levi found himself unable to think about how to go with this. he wanted to let you down easy, lessen the blow, but with that look of innocence in your eyes, you just made it so damn hard for him. “y/n, they’re all gone.”

“gone?”

“gone.” he hated having it come out so harsh, but he had to get the point across without any sugarcoating. levi couldn’t lie, it would be an incredible disservice to you.

“no…” then you began to recall all that happened yesterday; the forest, that god damn female titan, it all replayed in your mind like a never ending horror movie. “no, this is all just one big nightmare. you can pinch me now, okay?”

your delusions only made it worse for levi. he couldn’t let you fool yourself thinking there was the slightest chance they weren’t gone, but he saw, he knew. all the life had been taken out of them, and whoever was behind the monster did it so cold-heartedly. it made him seem a little more humane in the eyes of his peers, as shocking as that was.

“i found all of you scattered on the ground. i thought you died just like they did.” levi said, those last few words coming out strained as he struggled to keep it together. he couldn’t let you see him like this, no way. he had to find an excuse to leave you be so he could go somewhere and let it all out without anyone seeing him.

“this can’t be, oh god.” you sob uncontrollably, making levi uncomfortable. he felt this way because it only made him want to cry with you, but at the same time, it felt wrong to feel like that.

“i can give you space to process this.” he began to stand up, but you tug on his sleeve to stop him, much to levi’s surprise.

“no, no, no. stay.” you giving him orders? he couldn’t believe it, but he would let you stop him, just for a moment.

“it is typically me who gives orders, you know.” levi spoke deliberately.

“well.” you pause, trying to find the right words. “i order you to stay.”

and just like you always did with him, he couldn’t help but obey your order. you let go of levi’s sleeve as he sat back down in his chair, too flustered to look you in the eye.

“i just… i wanna say i’m sorry i failed the squad, but most importantly, i’m sorry i failed you.” you say, your words full of utter shame, feeling like a complete failure. it was like you had just harshly tugged at levi’s heartstrings, despite it being crazy to think that levi ackerman did in fact have a heart.

“there was nothing you could do. the female titan outsmarted all of us.” he replied in that typical monotone voice. it almost started to irritate you. you were trying to have some sort of heartfelt conversation and it seemed like he couldn’t take you seriously. levi wanted to take all of it seriously, but he continuously battled with his mind and heart, and his mind kept winning.

“but it shouldn’t have happened.” you try to protest.

“we can’t turn back time, y/n.” levi argued back.

you can’t help but roll your eyes at him, a huge shock on levi’s end. “god, your words are terrible.”

“excuse me?”

“don’t you know it’s okay to feel things, captain?” you ask him. “i know they call you “humanity’s strongest soldier,” but is being emotionless a requirement?”

he’s unable to form words. where had this fire in you come from? had it been hiding this whole time? where had this disobedient soul been during the entirety of levi’s reign? he couldn’t help but be shocked yet amazed at the same time.

“that squad was like family to me.” you say with tears streaming down your face. “i thought you would’ve felt the same way, but i guess that suspicion i desperately tried to push away was right.”

“…and that is?”

“that you never liked any of us, not one bit, especially…” your lips tremble, but you force yourself to finish your sentence. “especially me.”

when you said those last two words, levi almost gasped. it made him feel so… terrible. so goddamn terrible he knew he couldn’t let his mind win anymore. it was time he chose his heart for once. “that’s nowhere near how i feel, y/n.”

“and how is it that you feel, captain?” you question, refusing to let your tears stop you from standing your ground.

this was it. this was the moment levi would pour his heart out to you. you were a rare jewel who was capable of giving him those pangs in his chest. not everyone could do that, but you sure could without trying or realizing it whatsoever.

“all my life, i thought that there was no point in caring because you’ll lose it eventually, but…” he began to speak, almost tempted to hold back, but he refused to do so any longer. “all i’ve ever been given here is a reason to care, and i didn’t want to show it. i didn’t want anyone to see it, and i wish they could know that i did. i did care, more than what’s possible to express.”

your hardened expression turned soft. to think he didn’t have such feelings made you feel so stupid. it’s easy to judge a book by its cover, isn’t it? but you read levi all wrong. oh so wrong. “you did?”

“i do, even now. that applies to you too, you know.” levi replied without shame.

“i didn’t think it did.” you avert his gaze.

“it’s almost disgraceful to admit how often you cross my mind, y/n.” your eyes widen when those words escape his mouth. was this real life? it seemed too good to be true. levi immediately thought he crossed a line, so he tried to shut the situation down as quickly as he could without ruining this moment. “i’m sorry if that came out weird, i—”

“no, no! it’s not weird!” you swiftly interrupt him. “i… i could say the same thing.”

“you could?” he said in amazement. it was like he was completely oblivious. why else were you always so eager to obey his orders and make sure you never let him down? you wanted him to notice you, and now he has given you his attention in the best way possible.

“yes, which i guess is kind of odd considering this is the first real conversation we’ve ever had.” you say with a faint giggle towards the end. “it’s a shame it had to be under these circumstances, really.”

“i know, and i’d like more, if you do too. it’s not an order, i swear.” levi replied eagerly, which was a pleasant surprise.

“i’d like that, captain.” you grin.

“can i… give you an order though?” he asked with a bit of hesitance.

“seems like poor timing to me, don’t you think?” you question, almost tempted to laugh at him, but you were going to see where this went.

“it’s not. i just… would prefer it if you called me levi from now on, please.” as if this couldn’t get any better. levi was saying “please” to you. god, you loved it.

“okay, levi. now i have an order for you.” you say with a smirk. “have a cup of tea with me, and you’re making it.”

levi smiled at the thought of what he would say next. “right away, y/n.”

© plutoccult / 310802. please do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my content in or outside of tumblr. reblogs are appreciated <3

[ioniansunsets]

Okay so... your Heartsteel Boys and Their Love wrecked me, esp Ez and Phel. Is it okay to make requests? Could you write a Heartsteel!Aphellios scenario with a smol male reader who works at the studio? Requited "unrequited" crush; he thinks it could never work cuz this man is a music icon and clearly with Sett lol Like Settphel is probably a thing in-universe gossiped about by fans (but doesn't actually exist). Oh wow, that was long 😅 But yeah! You can take it from that prompt! Your work is awesome.

✖ Heartsteel!Aphelios x Male!Reader Confession ✖

✖ Word Count: 1.5k

✖ Tags: Mutual Pining, Confession

✖ A/N: Just know I have been thinking about this since you sent it in, for weeks I've wanted to write this and I got really carried away so I hope you enjoy it! It made my heart race in anticipation and I was the one writing it LMAO

Unrelated lyric wise but this was what I was listening to while writing this oops I'm old but the acoustic vibes and unrequited love felt right.

----

It was hard. Watching him from a distance this way. Holding yourself back knowing you were not part of the band nor part of their inner circle and truly have no chance. And that is already ignoring the fact that you don't even get to work with Aphelios alone much, he doesn't sing and you worked on that side of things so the only times you really see him at the studio is when he is working on stuff with you or for a photoshoot like now.

Wincing, you watch Sett pick your crush up. Aphelios' arms flailing in annoyance, gently resting on the taller man's chest as he visually shows how he demands to be let down. The giggles and chuckles of other staff and band members just made your heart ache all the more. You scoff, turning to walk away to spare yourself anymore of their cute interactions. You know, just looking at this scene, exactly why everyone thinks they're a couple. How could they not. Even you couldn't deny how cute the interaction was, how you wish you were the one holding Phel close.

The excited comments of " How cute!" and " I ship Settphel so hard." from other people working in the studio just rubbed salt into your wounds. The only solace in that, was at the very least, maybe it meant Phel swung that way and you'd have a chance. But against Sett? What could you do, if his type was big buff men, you were out of luck yet again. You let out a dry laugh as you leave the studio to take a break, not noticing Aphelios' gaze tracking you as you hurry out.

Get some air, yeah, you'll be fine if you grab a snack and pretend you saw and heard nothing. You'll be fine, this was what it was like loving Aphelios. This was alright.

So here you are, moping about it, a drink in one hand and your face in the other. Sitting depressingly with your elbows on the table in an booth far off in the corner of the building's café. If anything, at least it wasn't lunch rush so you could take some time alone. The soft instrumentals of the café's ambient music was somehow making you feel worse.

Thoughts and frustrations were plaguing you so hard you don't hear someone else enter the café, you don't hear them walk over and then sit by you.

It was only until they leaned in close and shoved an open note app on their phone screen under your hands into your line of sight that you jumped, shocked by your personal space getting intruded upon.

[Saw you leave suddenly, are you ok?]

Ah fuck fuck fuck, you know that phone you know that hand.

Looking up to see those god forsaken beautiful ruby red eyes sparkling with concern. You wanted his attention and care but not like this, not when you looked so pitiful, not when you're trying to push down your overwhelming feelings for him.

Offering Aphelios a pained smile you wave away his concern. Silence between you two was thick. It only made your heart sting more. You came here to escape the obvious one sided pinning but with Aphelios here it just made it so much worse.

[It's not really nothing if you're crying...]

Oh were you crying, oh this sucks this sucks. A soft shaky laugh leaves you as you wipe away your tears. Doing your best you try to divert the conversation away from bringing up your feelings.

" Why are you here anyway, you're mid shoot Aphelios. We're not even that close."

You ask him, leaning back into the booth chair. Hands now clasped together, trying your best to hold yourself together.

[I took a break. Wanted to check on you when I saw you run out. You're still my friend you know?]

He looks at you, eyebrows furrowed in concern. How you wish you could reach up and lightly caress that little cut in his brow and tell him its alright, it was just your personal problems regarding him. But you hold yourself back. You bite your tongue, thinking what to say to make all of this better. Recognizing your hesitant attitude he quickly types something else before holding his phone up to you again.

[ You always look out for me when I'm alone and frustrated in the studio, let me do the same for you.]

You pause again, shocked he even remembers all you've done for him.

" I am in love with someone I can't have."

You blurt it out, your own hand rising to cover your mouth. Ah, there was no going back now, this conversation was happening, you did this to yourself.

You see Aphelios freeze up, a flash of heartbreak across his features before it quickly returns to his cool default expression. The click of his neatly trimmed and manicured painted nails against his phone screen was all the more deafening. You should have told the truth.

[ An idol?]

Were you imagining this or was his hand shaky as he held up the phone again.

" An idol...but I think he already has someone so-"

[ He?]

Those damned sparkling ruby eyes looking up at you in hope set your heart off yet again. Why the hell did he have to look at you like that.

" He.

.

.

.

You."

Time froze as you whispered it out. The words leaving your mouth before your brain could catch up. The overwhelming feelings pushed you to admit it, to tell him after months of pinning. You were in love with him. You watched of course, the way shock crosses his features. Alright, you've done this before, the disgust would come next. You prepare yourself but it never happens. Instead he moves closer to you. What? He moved clos- You gulp hard, watching him.

Gently and so painfully slow, you watched his hand rise, slowly pulling down his mask. Ah, his lips, slightly pink, looking so soft, lip gloss still evident on the surface from the photoshoot earlier. The way it curls up gently into a smile as he leans in to you. He leans in to you?! He was barely hovering by your ear now. Your breath gets caught in your throat as Phel's soft breaths lightly ghost over your ears before, the softest, raspiest whispers grace your eardrums.

" I love you."

You froze. What else could you do. The shock gripping your heart, leaving you stunned for what felt like an eternity. It was only when Aphelios pulls away from you slowly. His damned, beautiful, ruby red eyes. They lock with yours. Eyebrows furrow just a smidge in concern, hoping he didn't overstep his boundaries, that your earlier comment allowed him the grace of talking directly into your ears. They had of course. You dreamt of this. His lips, once again, you watch, the way it slowly purses into a thin line, you should say something. Leaving him hanging in the same anxiety you have this way is horrible.

" I love you... Aphelios."

Ah it felt good. The way your chest now feels light. To say it out this way. To let your feelings finally escape into the world outside. To no longer stump it down in frustration. The trembling of your hands, the gasp and smile as Aphelios hears you speak.

And everything hits. All at once. Heart thrumming incessantly in your ears. The hustle and bustle of the world outside suddenly all too loud. The hand reaching up to hold your face and pull you close was all so fast. So fast. So soft. So gentle.

The way his eyes flutter close, the way his hands hold your face like you were something precious to him. The way his lips find yours. Just as soft and supple as you imagined all these weeks. His lips find yours. So gentle. So soft. So gentle. So soft. Your head spins as he kisses you. This was amazing, better than you could ever whip up in the private scenarios of your mind when you daydreamed about him from a distance. This was perfect. So perfect.

The two of you gasp as Aphelios pulls away. His lips slightly parted as he breathes slowly. The way it now shines a little from residual saliva from the kiss. Your heart races, you were so sure it has skipped more than a few beats. The whole scene burned into your memory for years to come.

He was oh so beautiful. Aphelios' face breaks into a warm smile. His eyes narrow from the grin, the pink tinge of a blush under his makeup, his hair falling softly around his cheeks. You can't help but smile too, all the endlessly frustrating one sided pinning that led to this was worth it. You sigh, content, pulling him into a hug. You don't hear it but feel the rise and fall of his chest as he laughs, hugging you back tightly as he leans his head on your shoulder. This was right. This was good. This was happiness. This was yours.

[circle-with-me]

‘tis the damn season - part 5

Pairing: Will Ramos x OFC (Gen/Viv/Vivvy)

Content Warning/Tags: 18+ MDNI!!! nightmares, psychological abuse, verbal abuse, implications of physical abuse, menacing/threatening behavior, toxic relationship with parent (father), mentions of death, mentions of car wrecks, mentions of alcoholism, panic attacks, unprotected vaginal sex, creampie.

First part of this may be rough for some but after that is pure FLUFF I swear! Tooth rotting. They’re adorable, I love them so much.

Word Count: 3k

tag list: @concretenoah @deathblacksmoke @sitkowski @bngurngheart @malice-ov-mercy @witchyweeb34 @lyschko666 @cookiesupplier @lilrubles @meekahy @lacktoesandtoddlerants @sammyjoeee @collective-heartbreak @agravemisstake @catharsis-in-darkness @0fth34byss

Authors note: PLEASE PLEASE READ THE TAGS BEFORE YOU READ THIS PART!

There is a nightmare scene that can be pretty rough for some and I want to make sure everyone is prepared. You do not have to read that part to know that is going on with the rest of the story so I have divided it up so you can scroll through it. The scene is in italics. Once you reach the snowflake divider you’ve made it to the rest of the story. Love you guys and thanks as always for reading my thing ♥️

thank you to @deathblacksmoke and @concretenoah for being the best beta readers/listening to me go on about this fic incessantly. They’re my biggest helpers and supporters and I wouldn’t know what to do without them 🤍

warning divider by @cafekitsune, snowflake divider by @saradika-graphics, t. swift lyrics dividers by yours truly

“Genevieve! Get down here NOW!” 

She stiffens at her father’s booming voice calling for her downstairs. Even with her door closed it sounded as if he was right next to her. Gen sits at the edge of her bed, dreading what would happen next. He would become angrier the longer she made him wait but fear kept her frozen.

“GENEVIEVE!” The voice boomed again. “Don’t make me come up there!”

She whimpers at the threat, knowing if she doesn’t get up immediately he’ll make good on it. Wiping the tears from her cheeks she gets up and opens her door, padding down the hallway to the staircase.

Gen stands at the top of the stairs and peers over in an attempt to catch a glimpse of him. She hears noises from the kitchen, shuffling around followed by shattering glass and a string of curses. He’s drunk, but what else is new? 

“God dammit Genevieve, you don’t fucking li-” She jumps as his large frame stampedes out of the kitchen and to the bottom of the stairs. He halts when he sees her, the fury in his eyes turning to annoyance. He grips the railing, taking a step up. 

“Mija, why did I get a call from school today telling me you’ve been skipping class?”

Gen feels her heart start to race. 

“Daddy, I-I..” She stammers, tears welling up in her eyes. “I only skipped class once so I could..”

He slams his fist against the railing and Gen freezes in place, wrapping her arms around herself for comfort. 

“Don’t lie to me, bitch.” He spits.

“I’m not lying to you, daddy! I promise. It was just one time! I wanted..”

He takes another step up.

“What the fuck is so important that you had to skip class for, huh?”

Gen whimpers, she knew he’d be furious to find out the truth but if she lied it would be ten times worse. She doesn’t even look up when she speaks.

“Tomorrow is Will’s birthday and I wanted to get him something special. He likes manga and the only place that sells it around here closes early. So, I left before the last period started so I could get there on time.” 

“You skipped school to buy that stupid boy a comic book?” Gabriel sneers, narrowing his eyes at his daughter. 

“Daddy, he’s not..”

“And whose fucking money did you buy that with?” 

“Mine.” She sniffles. “Mrs. Hart has been having some trouble getting around so she asked me to help her with some housework. I told her not to but she insisted on paying me.” 

He barks a laugh but there’s no humor behind it. In fact, it’s so cold it makes Gen’s skin crawl. 

“Always taking advantage of people. What would your mother think of you?” Gen winces. He loves to use her mother against her. “I bet you went over to the neighbors begging for money. Just like when you cry to Will about how terrible I treat you.”

Gabriel ascends the step once more, taking two steps this time. 

“Maybe I wouldn’t drink all the time or be so ‘terrible’ if I had a better daughter. Did you think of that? I lost my wife and I get to look at her spitting image every single day. You will never be half the woman she was… It should have been you that died in that wreck.”

If he had said that a year ago, his statement would have devastated her. She reasons that in some way it probably still does, but her bitterness and hatred for the man she calls her father usurps that feeling. 

Gen looks in his eyes— eyes that have been lifeless and cold for years. She knew the risks, the consequences, the days of recovery ahead of her but she didn’t care. If he was going to sink that low then so was she.

“No, daddy. You can blame your drinking on me if you want to but you had a problem long before mom died. If you weren't such a drunk that wreck never would have happened. It should have been you that died.”

Gabriel’s lips curl in anger, a snarl coming from his chest. “You little fucking bitch!” He bounds up the stairs towards her, reaching out to grab her and—

Gen’s eyes fly open and she pants looking around the room. Her vision is so blurry she can barely see anything and it doesn’t help her racing heart. She lays her head back against the pillow, trying to slow her breathing. 

“It was just a bad dream. It’s over. Breathe.” She whispers to herself. After a few minutes, she opens her eyes, her vision much clearer. She feels something shift slightly next to her and she looks over.

Beside her, as far away from her as he possibly could be, was Will. His brown eyes stare at her like she’s a wounded puppy and he wants to rescue her. From day one, he was always her protector, but he had witnessed enough nightmares to know he needed to stay away until the coast was clear.

Gen smiles meekly at him, body still trembling and tears falling freely. She stretches her arm out towards him. He was so far away from her that her fingertips barely brush his chest. 

A strangled “baby” is all she can get out but that’s good enough for Will. He envelops her in his arms, pulling her into his chest, softly kissing her face. She sobs into his arms while he rubs her back, soothing her with sweet words. 

“I’m here, baby. I’ve got you.” He whispers. 

Will doesn’t need her to tell him what happened. The whines and cries in her sleep were enough. He remembers all of the sleepless nights for both of them, navigating through the nightmares and trauma plaguing her. Will thinks about the years of nightmares she has had with no one to comfort her like he is now and his heart aches.

Gen clutches onto him, burying herself deeper into his chest, gasping sobs wracking her body. Will holds her tightly, knowing it always gets worse before it gets better. He gently strokes her hair, crooning a song he’s done his best to forget in her ear.

“I look back to the one and only summertime

When my girl was the envy of every friend of mine

She slept safely in my arms

We were so young and invincible”

Will feels her shuddered breaths calm a little. The grip she has on him relaxes, her hands still shaking but lightly rubbing at his sides. He takes that as a hint to keep going.

“Closed lips

She was never one to kiss and tell

Those trips in the summer never went so well

Young love was such dumb love

Call it what you want

It was still enough”

Gen’s body continues to calm as he sings. He stops singing and hums as he takes a peek at her. He notices she’s not crying anymore and wipes the remaining tears from her face. She cracks an eye open and sniffles, hugging him even closer and nuzzling into his neck whining for him to continue. He smiles softly. There’s my girl. He thinks.

“And it's still out of my reach

And you're still

All of the things that I want in my life

How could I ask you to leave me?”

And we were just kids in love

The summer was full of mistakes

We wouldn't learn from

The first kiss stole the breath from my lips

Why did the last one tear us apart?”

His singing becomes quieter as he processes the lyrics. They were fifteen when they first heard this song. It came out the summer they started dating and it seemed perfect at the time. Will heard it first and declared it “their song” immediately. Gen had complained at first that the song was too sad but Will told her to focus on the sweet parts. He reassured her the sad verses would never apply to them.  

Fourteen years later the realization that they not only do apply to them but almost mirror their situation perfectly was almost too much for Will to bear. 

“We're falling down

Can we pick up the pieces?

We're at an all-time low

How do we get it back?

We're falling down”

The last few words come out a cracked and broken mess as tears stream down his face. He attempts to hide his pain from Gen but she hears it and can feel his heart pounding. She looks up at him, tears of her own returning, but the look in her eyes is no longer panic. Instead, it’s heartbreak, empathy, and longing. 

Gen smiles at him, adjusting herself so that she can wrap her arms around his neck. She kisses him gently. It’s so gentle that he can barely feel it and he wants more but doesn’t want to rush her. 

They lay together, wrapped in each other’s arms for a while, their lips meeting with little intention besides soothing the other person. Will’s hands roam her back and sides, staying in neutral areas until she’s ready. 

 When Gen deepens the kiss, he lets her have control. He can feel that she needs more by the way she pulls at his neck and rubs herself against him. He smiles into the kiss and plays with the frayed ends of her shirt.

“Is this okay?” He breathes, rubbing his fingers only barely under the hem.

She nods and he slides his hand under her shirt, his thumb brushing her ribcage just under her breasts. She lifts her leg over his hip and pulls him in closer, moaning as she feels how hard he is against her. Will cups her breast in his hand while he grinds into her slowly, swallowing every moan she gives him.

“Turn around for me.” Will requests and she obliges, rotating in the opposite direction and making a point to place her ass right up against his crotch as she settles down. Will chuckles and grabs her hips, grinding into her hard. Gen giggles back at him, gasping softly. 

“Are you ready for me, baby? Need you.” He says slipping a hand in her panties and running a finger through her slit. He curses at how wet she is and quickly shoves his boxers down, hiking her leg over his. He pushes her panties to the side and slips inside of her.

Will slides his other arm underneath her and wraps it around her chest, pressing his body as close to hers as he can get. He presses kiss after kiss on her face and neck, slowly dragging his cock in and out of her. 

Gen reaches back to card her fingers through his curls, bringing their lips together. She whimpers against his mouth, begging him to go faster. Will increases his movements, the sound of her stuttered moans already forming a knot in his stomach.

“Touch yourself for me, Vivvy… please” Will pants into her neck. “Need to.. fuck, want you to finish with me.” 

Gen snakes her hand down her stomach, circling her clit with the pads of her fingers. Will watches her from over her shoulder, squeezing her hip so hard  he’ll be shocked if he doesn’t leave a mark. 

“Will.” Gen cries, moving her hips to meet his thrusts. With every new thrust inside of her he can feel her getting closer. The muscles in her belly are tensing and her legs are beginning to shake. Will watches as she practically bounces on his cock chasing her release.

“I’m here, baby. Let go for me. I’ve got you.” He coos, feeling his own climax coming on quickly. 

Gen stills in front of him, crying out his name, shaking and moaning. Will pulls her so close he can barely breath and continues thrusting until he spills deep inside of her. 

For some time, neither of them move or say a word. Will curls around her, still holding her tightly while Gen places featherlight kisses to his fingers. Both actions, while truly sincere, have hidden meanings. 

One of them is trying to keep the other as close as possible in fear of them retreating. While the other is remembering for the first time in years what it’s like to experience a safe place in the form of a person.

Gen feels the bed dip beside her and a warm hand runs up her arm. She makes a contented sound but keeps her eyes shut. Will removes his hand and replaces it with his lips, kissing up to her shoulder. 

“Time to get up, sleepy head.” He hums. 

Gen pulls the covers over her head groaning and he laughs, fighting to get them off of her. 

“Viv, It’s almost 2:30. We’ve been sleeping all day!”

The vice grip Gen has on the comforter stays as Will hears her grumbling something underneath them.

“What’s that?” He says, tilting his head and putting his ear to the blanket. “I can’t hear you, you’re gonna have to whine louder!”

A hand reaches out of the comforter and pinches Will’s side and he yelps. A satisfied snicker comes from below the fabric barrier as her hand retreats but he’s quick to grab it.

Gen squeals as he rips the comforter off of her and grabs her other hand, pinning them above her head. He watches her as she giggles uncontrollably; She’s trying, but not really to remove herself from his grasp. He kisses her face repeatedly and he lets her remove her hands so she can wrap her arms around him. 

“We need to get up, Vivvy.” Will says between pecks. 

“Whyyyy?” Gen drags out, giving him her best pout.

“Well, for one.. we haven’t eaten all day which is just not acceptable. Especially for a lazy day. And two…” He stands up and walks over to the window and peeks through the blinds. “It’s snowing.”

Gen sits up on her elbows, a baffled expression on her face. 

“And…?” 

Will rolls his eyes. 

“And.. If I recall correctly someone used to love playing in the snow. At least before she turned into a big grump.” He teases.

Gen’s eyes light up and she scrambles to the window. She looks out as Will holds the blinds open for her, noticing how much it snowed overnight. Gen estimated there were probably five to six inches outside. It was perfect for a fun day in the snow.

“Can we go outside now?” She asks, buzzing with excitement.

“Food first. Snow after.” He replies.

After they eat, Gen practically runs to get dressed, stealing clean clothes from Will’s dresser to layer with. Seeing her in his clothes, the way his sweatpants cling to her hips and accentuate her curves makes him short of breath. 

He considers the option of pulling them off of her and bending her over the dresser she was standing at but he knew not to mess with a woman and her snow plans. Even if sex was involved. Besides, there was always afterwards.

Will decides it’s best to distract himself so he walks into the living room to finish getting ready. Gen follows him shortly after, grabbing her boots and putting them on.

Will zips up his puffer jacket and turns around, watching as Gen puts on her pathetic excuse for a coat. He stands and watches her for a moment, an amused expression on his face. When she looks up, she sees him and grins.

“What?” 

“You spend a few years in L.A. and forget how to dress for the weather here.” Will snickers as he gets up and assesses her outfit. He shakes his head and tuts at her. “Unacceptable.” Gen sticks her tongue out and Will laughs as he walks to his closet.

He brings her his extra puffer and beanie, placing the hat on her head and letting her put the jacket on herself. 

“At least you brought a scarf, you monster.” He teases, fixing it around her neck. “Can’t have my girl freezing out there.”

Gen feels her cheeks flush, surprised at how quickly she accepts it. Was there a point in fighting it though? She was his girl. That had never changed, no matter how long she tried to combat it. In the back of her mind, she’s reminded this is temporary, but she stubbornly pushes it away. For once, she’s going to let herself have what she wants. 

Will zips the jacket up for her, adjusting the scarf and making sure she was nice and snug. “That’s much better.” He says as he leans in and kisses her nose. He wraps his arms around her waist and rubs his nose against hers, grinning as she giggles uncontrollably.

“Ready to go, baby?”

Gen peers around the corner of the tree she’s hiding around. Will stands a few feet away, his back facing her. She sneaks around the tree, as quietly as the crunch of the snow would allow and runs toward him, throwing the snowball in her hand at him and hitting his back. 

“There you are!” Will yells, running after her. He gathers up snow, throwing it back at her while he chases her. Shrieks of laughter permeate the cold winter air as they sprint around like little kids. Will finally catches up to her and grabs her, pulling her down on top of him.

Gen pulls down the scarf around his face, covering his face with kisses, focusing specifically on his cold red nose. She doesn’t miss the quiet giggles he lets out between each peck. His arms squeeze her tightly against him and despite the 20° temperature, she feels warmer than ever.

Will removes his arms from her suddenly and she sulks. He beams at her, spreading his arms and legs out in the snow, attempting to move them in a sweeping motion. 

“It’s very hard to make a snow angel when you’re on top of me.” 

Gen scoffs and rolls off of him, landing on her back next to him. 

“That’s the first time you’ve ever complained about me being on top of you before.”

“First and only time, Vivvy.” He winks. “Now, are you gonna make one with me or is mine gonna sit here out in the snow all by itself?”

Gen and Will make their snow angels, and Will hops up to help her off the ground. They stand in front of them to assess their handiwork.

“Looks good to me. What do you think, babe?” He asks, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

“Perfect.” Gen responds, nuzzling into his chest. “Absolutely perfect.”

[taeminsung]

backstage..

pairing: jeongin x reader

summary: a grumpy jeongin misses you while on tour, and cannot be bothered to smile until him members give a much needed distraction.

a/n: my dear anon - thank you for your request! please enjoy ♡  

Jeongin knew, he really knew, he shouldn’t be in the mood that he was in, yet here he was, tired, annoyed, and grumpy. Touring and seeing Stay was supposed to make him happy, but the thought of having to go do a rehearsal caused a quick sharp intake of breath, followed by a very long exhale that he knew attracted the attention of at least two of his hyungs. He felt bad but didn’t know what to do. Letting his head drop back to the back of the couch, he pulled out his phone again, scrolling through his various apps before opening his notes app to continue working on the lyrics he started the last time he saw you.

Thumbs hovered over the keys as his thoughts drifted back to that day. He promised you a day filled with fun before you had to leave again, but instead the two of you ended up in the studio for hours on end so that he could record the guides for the new comeback songs. Those hours turned into you quietly sleeping on Chan’s couch, not only breaking Jeongin’s heart but also inspiring him to write a new song. He rarely got time with you due to the distance of your relationship, and he hated that after traveling all the way to him, he had to work for most of it. If he was truly honest with him, that day was the beginning of the decline in his mood as he quickly turned around to go on tour.

Rehearsals started before he could get any lyrics written, souring his attitude a bit more. He again knew it was himself that he was frustrated with and not anyone else, but when he saw Changbin and Han messing around, something in him snapped, and the scoff was heard around the empty stadium. All eyes turned to him, and he simply turned and moved to get into position for the next song, trying his best to ignore the stares and whispers of concern around him. Rolling his eyes, he mentally started counting the hours until Chan cornered him into talking about what was going on with him. His fingers moved slowly to his neck, where the necklace you gifted him laid. He just wanted to talk with you before he said something to his members that he really didn’t mean.

Time passed quickly backstage and with only an hour left before the concert, Jeongin tried calling you repeatedly since you weren’t picking up. After the fourth or fifth time, he gave up tossing his phone on the couch, moving to get changed. However, he didn’t miss the way that a staff member said something low to Minho, who quickly moved to whisper something to Felix. The actions rubbed him the wrong way as he assumed they were talking about him and his actions. With a huff he left the room to get changed into his first outfit and hopefully calm down before touching the stage, as he didn’t want Stay to see him like this. His thoughts drifted back to your warm smile and the way you giggled and hide behind him whenever the boys poked fun at the two of you. He desperately missed your smile today.

Entering the room again, he noted the way that every single member stopped talking as soon as he was in view. Snatching up his phone, he again tried phoning you and was only met with the sound of your voice on your message system. Intently listening to the entire thing just to hear your lovely voice, he quietly left a message, I miss you… a lot today, before hanging up and turning to see Hyunjin and Minho close by getting hyped up to get on stage. With one last longing stare at his phone, hoping to see your name light up the screen, he allowed himself to turn to his members and begin to get in the right head space for the show. Throughout the show, he found his hands wandering to that necklace, lingering a few moments before moving back to the dance moves or his side.

When the show was over, and everyone returned backstage, Jeongin started to feel like his world may crash down around him, as again the feeling of grumpiness settled into his bones. In truth, he really didn’t want to sleep alone, but he also didn’t want to be that annoying youngest member was always asking to share a bed on the road. Releasing a shaky breath, he headed toward the other room to change out of his stage cloths, noticing again how everyone started whispering. After a quick scan of the room, he also noted that Chan was no where to be found. Slowly, he left the room and changed into his other cloths, looking at his phone again to see that you hadn’t even tried to reply to him in the house since he called you. The feeling of hollowness entered his chest, and he took a deep breath going back to his members.

Dragging his feet, he returned to the other room, staring at the floor wondering what member would be the most receptive to sharing a room with him. As he was coming to his decision of who to ask, he heard the melody of a voice that he loved so much dance across the room. His eyes snapped up to see you half standing behind Chan explaining to him and Felix how amazing it was to finally see the concert from the audience and how the experience was so much different than being backstage. A smile tugged gingerly at the corners of his mouth as he quickly floated through the room, wrapping his arms around your waist, and spinning you around a few times.

The relief flooded through his body as the sensation of happiness immediately took over him. He felt as though his heart was skipping beats all over the places and he tucked you into his side, planting a long kiss into your hair. Coming back his senses, he turned to see all the members surrounding you both, smiling and greeting you in the ways you had grown close with each of them. Thank you again for getting me the tickets, he heard you sincerely thank everyone in the room, it was such a treat to see this guy on stage from the audience, you finished as he felt your hip bump into him. At the words, he again buried his face into your hair, a blush creeping across his face.

We felt like you needed to have her by your side for the remaining part of the tour Innie, Chan explained with a wide grin on his face. The words sunk into him, and his actions earlier forced his eyes to the ground as he knew that he really did owe a lot to his hyungs and this only added to that very long list. Honestly, we were just over you bring grumpy all the time, Minho shrugged with a small smirk on his lips before going to change out of his stage cloths. Laughter filled the room, as he found you looking up at him with a puzzled look on your face. Jeongin turned pulling you into another crushing hug as he knew that he deserved those words after today. Your arms wrapped around his waist as you melted into him, he relaxed at the light tough of your fingers on his lower back. Later, he mumbled before pressing his lips to yours quickly, before pulling back and looking at your face. Another kiss was planted on your lips before dragging you over to the couch, to cuddle while everyone changed before going back to the hotel. Holding the girl he loved, he let your presence heal the parts of him that needed it.

♡ ── thank you for reading! requests are open.  

[dr-tonytonychopper]

BATFAMILY AS FOLKLORE SONGS

i’m honestly shocked i’ve haven’t done this one. this one is a little different tbh, usually i just do characters and maybe lyrics but this time i did actually did explanations and i was watching the long pond sessions so i could get accurate notes on each song. DISCLAIMER there’s a lot of run on sentences and i hope it all makes sense, peace and love-ssb✌️🫶

the 1: steph and tim, i see this as being from both of their povs. i think a relationship between them wouldn’t work long term it would’ve been fun if you would’ve been the one

cardigan: dick/babs, i know that all writers have their own opinions on who is the “other woman” but timeline wise it’s kori so i see this as being from babs pov bc she goes back to him no matter what

the last great american dynasty: The Wayne’s, i feel that after Bruce adopts his kids and starts collecting others he starts kinda shifting what the wayne’s are where as when he grew up it was about image, poise and galas he starts to change and all he cares abt is if his kids are comfortable i had a marvelous time ruining everything

exile: jason and bruce, even though this song is like two lovers fighting i think it can be interpreted as jason being upset after tim becomes robin and it took you five whole minutes to pack us up and leave me with it and i can see bruce’s pov of being fed up with giving jason the chance to do the right thing but him not doing it like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me second, third and hundredth chances balancing on breaking bridges, i couldn’t turn things around you never turned things around

my tears ricochet: damian and talia, “it’s a song about greed. it’s a song about how somebody could be your best friend and your companion and your most trusted person in your life and then they could go and become your worst enemy who knows how to hurt you because they were once your most trusted person.” Taylor Swift long pond sessions you had to kill me but it killed you just the same this whole song and specifically this part and the quote reminds me of when talia made and had a clone of damian kill him i didn’t have it in me to go with grace and you’re the hero flying around saving face you hear my stolen lullabies

mirrorball: Stephanie, i’ve never been a natural all i do is try i know everyone is like this is dicks songs it’s not he’s the natural however i feel stephanie is put on this pedestal for being independent but she’s not and i feel like she morphs herself into a different version of herself depending on who she’s with “we have mirror balls in the middle of a dance floor because they reflect light they are broken a million times and that’s what makes them so shiny. we have people like that in society. they hang there and everytime they break it entertains us” Taylor Swift long pond sessions

seven: damian and jon, it’s a song abt besties idk 🤷🏻‍♀️ past down like folk songs the love lasts so long

august: kori/dick, IM SORRY DICKORI/ KORI STANS! to me when writers write this love triangle they write babs as the one, she’s smart and sensible and someone to settle down with while kori is written as a fling and something that is just someone who’s there in the moment and that’s what august is about it’s about this girl who was seen by this guy as a fling while she is truly falling for him and from everybody’s pov she’s this bad girl and temptress while all she wants is to love and to be loved

this is me trying: tim, they told me all my cages were mental so i got wasted like all my potential, tim is often now written as this happy go lucky character and i think that in red robin he’s fighting some real demons but in the newer runs he’s fighting to make it through the day or insecurities about his position in the family or as a superhero or even as bernard’s boyfriend and i feel like it’s just so real like no other character is going to compare to me when it comes to that and when it comes to his position in everyday life he is the definition as wasted potential he is crazy smart and charismatic but he just hates school and hates studying i was so ahead the curve that the curve became a sphere

illicit affairs: bruce/ talia, bruce and talias relationship is not healthy but i do believe that they both or at least bruce loved the other person and i feel like it shouldn’t even be described as an relationship because it seems like a means to an end

invisible string: the entire batfamily, definition of right place at the right time

mad woman: cass, in the comics and fics cass is often written to be a crazy, feral woman and i think that it’s a narrative constantly written about women and i feel like men are written as traumatized while women are not written or perceived with that tone they are written as vindictive or crazy

epiphany: babs and jim gordon, epiphany is written paralleling WWII to the pandemic and i think the perfect parallel in comic book history is babs and commissioner gordon fighting the same fight but taking different paths or routes and aaron dessner describes the song as comparing taylor’s family history and hero’s of today and i feel like that’s the perfect way to describe it

betty: babs/dick/kori, i already described my thoughts twice but i feel like dick would maybe take more accountability

peace: bruce/selina, imma be honest i don’t know if it’s canon that bruce doesn’t do relationships bc of batman but it’s fitting and i feel like it’s probably that even in relationships with other heroes is a conversation to be had bruce truly can’t give selina peace, he cannot promise stability or a promise of staying alive or not being over tabloids as he’s the richest man alive all these people think loves for show but i would die for you in secret

hoax: duke, duke is the one character that i can’t really get a read on but as the newest member of the batfamily i feel like there’s still this feeling in him that’s like i have this new family and i love them but at the end of the day i want my parents my parents that raised me at the end of the day he’s a boy who wants his parents. i also feel like he’s still trusting of people and he reaps what he sowed everytime

the lakes: tim/bernard: tim always has an exit plan and it’s always escaping by himself to be by himself and i feel like it’s the same no matter who he’s with but when he met and started dating bernard he finally found someone to escape with and exit the hero world for im setting off, but not without my muse

batfam (taylor’s version) is coming so lmk what albums you guys want next🤭🤭

[dragonfly0808]

The Heathers Soundtrack Essay: You Only Have Yourselves to Blame for This

(I may not be wording this as well as I’d like cause I’m sick as fuck and I’m not sure I’m thinking very clearly but I’ll try to be cohesive)

Beautiful

So, Beautiful is such a good start to our story. It’s an 8 minute track but not a second of it feels unnecessary or boring. This is a perfect track not just to set the scene and the mood of Veronica’s high school and the people there, but it also does a great job at introducing almost every single important character in this musical.

For Veronica I personally get the vibe of someone who used to be, and may still want to be positive but has just been worn down by the cruelty of not ‘fitting in’ and being deemed an outcast. (As someone who was bullied for years for the stupidest reasons ever -being short and reading- I really feel every lyric from Veronica.) Veronica in this song tells us, we used to be so beautiful as children when we were innocent and we didn’t buy into steroetypes and stupid societal hierarchies, why can’t we go back to that? I am pissed that we can’t go back to that. I want to burn this place down because of all the pain I’ve been given for no real reason. At the end of the song, she seems to regain some of her hope and positivity at the chance of being one of the Heathers.

Martha feels like she’s trying to cling to her positivity. Like someone who indulges in the fantastical for some good old’ escapism (‘I’m a sucker for a happy ending’) she just gives me barely-holding-on vibes from what few lines she has here.

Kurt and Ram, I’ll only say, they’re asses and they sell it.

The moment when they’re all singing and lines overlap with each other is beautiful. Like, everyone is struggling in different ways, even if not everyone shows it.

Then… the Heathers. They’re moment in the bathroom perfectly sets each one of them up. Heather McNamara as the ‘softest’ of the Heathers and the most insecure as well as maybe a tiny bit ditzy. Her intro sets her up perfectly but also, later on we’ll see just how many layers she has.

Heather Duke, she cares ever so slightly about McNamara but is a bitch to Veronica, snapping at her for no real reason.

And of course… Heather Chandler, the icon. She’s just bitchy but in an almost classy way that I can’t really describe and I love her.

Also, quick note on the bathroom scene: I find it interesting the way the teacher, Miss Flemming speaks in this scene. Like, she’s almost giddy to have an excuse to put the Heathers in detention and very clearly doesn’t give a single flying shit about McNamara throwing up and in fact makes it a joke ‘Perhaps you didn’t hear the bell over all the vomiting-‘. That to me could be a nod to those teachers who just make high school/school in general worse than it has to be. Teachers that target specific students or that try and make themselves feel superior in weird ways. You know which ones I’m talking about.

Right now, I have a specific teacher that loves to embarrass students and it’s really fucking draining.

But yeah, Beautiful to me may be my favorite intro track to a Musical. It just works so well, I love it!

200/100

Candy Store

Do I have to say anything about this song? Come on, we all love it. It embodies the Heathers, especially Chandler perfectly. Heather Chandler is a grade A bitch. She’s unapologetic and she doesn’t really seem to have a conciense and if it is it is tied to a chair and gagged. Like, I think Heather Chandler would either never really see the error of her way (more accurately, she does know it’s wrong but she just never cares) or she gets to a point in which she realizes that she’s a bad person and tries to change for the better. But that obviously will never happen for her character so she’s stuck in this place in time/in her life when she truly did not give a single flying shit about anything or anyone. And that’s what truly allows her to shine.

Heather Chandler isn’t supposed to be a tragic character, that’s what Candy Store represents to me, she’s horrible and doesn’t care about even her closest friends. But she’s forced into being a tragic character with a sob story by Veronica and JD later in the story. And it’s this fake narrative that changes how everyone looks at her.

In the song we also see a bit of the dynamic between the Heathers. Like how Duke seems to want the spotlight but is literally shoved back by Chandler. How McNamara mostly goes along with everything but also her line ‘if she had your shot, she would leave you to rot’ gives me teeny tiny projection vibes from her.

250/100

Fight For Me

I love this song. It’s so… it’s almost corny and cheesy but in the best way possible.

I don’t have much to say other than listening to this with headphones truly just transports you to another world, you really get into it and it’s awesome.

(Though I will never forget that time it came up on shuffle during a car ride and my mom just kinda stared at me cause, the beginning is literally just ‘Holy shit’ x 20)

95/100

Freeze Your Brain

I love JD so much… his songs may be my fave…

Freeze Your Brain is just so amazing, it gives you a lot of insight not just into his character but also his mindset at the moment.

He’s just kinda given up in a way, why bother with making bonds with other people if he’s going to have to leave eventually?

He’s almost drifting through life, untethered to anything or anyone with no real purpose. At this point, he’s still a frozen lake.

He doesn’t see the point but he still doesn’t want to straight up die. So he does the best that he can to not feel the emptiness and pain inside this. ‘Happiness comes when everything numbs, who needs cocaine?’

And of course, the best line (and my fave) in the song:

‘And when the voice in your head says you’re better off dead, don’t open a vein! Freeze your brain.’ This is also the only moment in which we see his shield crack a bit, his voice changes, and we hear a tiny bit of the pain within him when he hits the high note.

200/100

Big Fun

Kurt and Ram are assholes, Veronica is way in over her head, Martha is too pure for this world, Duke is berated by Chandler and Heather Chandler is a menace to society.

What’s new?

Also, ‘There’s no alcohol in this, are you trying to poison me?’ Made me laugh way more than it should have.

And, ‘Showing up here took some guts, time to rip them out’ … Heather?! What the fuck?! She’s an absolute menace and I love it. STEP ON ME!

Just a fun song to reinforce what we already know about the characters and to exaggerate the high school experience.

90/100

Dead Girl Walking

…she’s an icon. We know her, we love her. She’s a legend.

A bop to lose one’s viriginity to (I’m Ace DO NOT take that seriously)

But in all seriousness I love this song. Veronica is just spiraling and truly decides ‘fuck it’ and goes to JD’s house.

‘So the world’s unfair keep it locked out there. In here it’s beautiful. Let’s make this beautiful’. These are two outsiders, two ‘others’ finding comfort in each other.

I think this: ‘I know it’s cause you’re beautiful, you say you’re numb inside but I can’t agree.’ Is when JD truly falls for Veronica, I think he was always attracted to her but I think this was his …oh moment.

Aside from deepening their relationship and being (in my opinion) the moment they both truly fall in love it’s just loads of fun and a bop.

250/100

The Me Inside of Me

This is when the chaos truly begins.

Veronica and JD accidentally kill Heather Chandler and now they want to make it seem like a suicide. So Veronica fakes a suicide letter.

I… love this song. Honestly more because of the… almost critisism of society than the actual song ajajjajaa

So, as I said earlier Heather Chandler isn’t really presented as a tragic or misunderstood character. But that’s exactly what she becomes when Veronica literally manipulates her narrative in the suicide note.

Now, Heather Chandler is suddenly this misunderstood girl that no one truly saw. She’s more of a concept for people to project their own pain and fears on to.

The teachers that thought she was the devil all of a sudden are saying ‘Oh, we just misjudged her. This is the loveliest suicide note I’ve ever read’.

She almost becomes a spectacle (which Heather herself seems to love ‘I’m bigger than John Lennon!’). All of a sudden everyone cares when before, everyone hated her.

Then there’s the line ‘Heather would be so proud of you!’ Which just makes me feel icky in the best way possible cause like… how the fuck would you know that? You are the one who said Heather was misjudged and never thought much of her but one read of the suicide note and you know her mindset?

Idk if I’m explaining myself all that well but let’s just say that I love how almost ironic this is and how everyone seems to see Heather as a martyr and someone to project their own feelings on to. Especially since we only really get the reactions of outsiders, not the Heathers or her parents who actually knew her and were (supposedly) close to her.

They only see her as someone who just maybe may have needed help after her death.

I just love it

200/100

Blue

This will be short. I’ll just say that this song had no right to be that fucking hilarious. You could take almost any lyric of this song out of context and it’d still be either hilarious or absolutely stump you.

Like, first time listening you’re just like… what the actual fuck is happening? Third time you’re screaming along cause you just can’t not do it.

100/100

Our Love is God

Welp, this is the start of JD’s unhinged arc…

First off we just have gorgeous, gorgeous vocals and I just die at the final high note every single time ugh!

Now. First part of the song (pre Kurt and Ram showing up) is beautiful.

It shows what we already know to be true. That deep down both Veronica and JD are incredibly vulnerable kids who just want someone to lean on. Someone to say ‘You’re not alone’, someone to understand not just the pain, but the rage that can come from years of being picked on, of being alone.

‘Are you okay?’ ‘I was alone. I was a frozen lake, but then you melted me awake see now I’m crying to.’ SOMEBODY SEDATE ME

We also get a tiny peek, a hint at what will happen later in the song from the very start ‘They made you cry. But that will end tonight. You are the only thing that’s right about this broken world. Go on and cry. But when the morning comes, we’ll burn it down and then we’ll build the world again.’ We already know that JD is depressive and maybe even suicidal. We know that he’s kinda given up on life and is just drifting through. Then he meets Veronica, who dissolves the numbness.

Of course she’s gonna be important to him and he’s going to be pissed when she’s hurt… but we don’t realize just how far JD is willing to go until later on.

Then… Kurt and Ram show up at the cemetery and what Veronica believes to be a prank… ends up being real.

She watches JD kill both of them and slowly realizes that, ‘I worship you’ ‘We’re what killed the dinosaurs, we’re the asteroid that’s overdue’ ‘they died because God said they must, the new world needed room for me and you’. Meant something a little different to JD than what it meant to her.

I think the last part of the song can be summed up by ‘And it was at this moment she knew, she fucked up.’

350/100

My Dead Gay Son

Another song more on the comedy side, I love it. Now, while Kurt and Ram also become a spectacle, this one is least about them than it is about why they supposedly died.

Are there a lot of stereotypes in this song? Yes, but it’s set in the 80’s and also it’s comedic so I pass it.

But there are also a few genuien moments that… not gonna lie get me sometimes. I really love the way that the dad’s are truly like, you know what? I don’t care that my son was gay, he should’ve been able to have a good life and that’s what I want the world to know.

Also, ‘Go forth and love each other now like our boys would’ve done’… ouch.

200/100

Seventeen

…I am just… *screams*

While my fave track changes every 5 seconds, Seventeen is probably my most listened to track. It’s just so beautiful.

From the very first lines of ‘Fine, we’re damaged. Really damaged. But that does not make us wise.’ I knew this song was gonna wreck me. And man did it wreck me.

This is just, Veronica imploring JD to not go down this dark path anymore.

This song is, I don’t want glory or a legendary life, I just want a normal life. I just want to be able to take a walk around the park and eat ice cream with you. Why can’t we have that?

I love the concept of Veronica being like, I thought my pain and trauma made me want to strike a match and set this dumb ablaze but now I realize that I just want a normal, soft life. With JD.

Also, the fact that JD doesn’t sing until the, ‘People hurt us.’ ‘Or they vanish.’ Hurts me in ways that I can’t quite explain.

And JD is really willing to try, he wants Veronica. A part of him wants revenge and pain but a part of him also wants that soft life. To be seventeen with her.

‘If you could let me in, I could be good with you’. I feel like that line sums up Veronica and JD so well and it hurts. If you could just let down your walls, show me who you are and I know that we could be so good together, that we could help each other so much. Ugh.

And then… the outro.

‘Yeah we’re damaged.’ ‘Badly damaged.’ But your love’s too good to lose. ‘Hold me tighter.’ ‘Even closer.’ ‘I’ll stay if I’m what you choose, cause you’re the one I choose’.

…Murder me right now that would hurt less.

This song is just too much!!!

400/100

Shine a Light

I think this one is a really fun song with an actual pretty good message. You know, ‘Why not shine a light on your biggest fears? If we show the ugly parts that we hide away, they turn out to be beautiful by the light of day! Shine and your scars and your flaws will look lovely because you shine, you shine a light!’

I have so much fun every single time this song plays, it’s just really upbeat and I love it.

Also, Idk why I always picture Veronica and JD just trading glances and smiles during this song and it makes me want to cry.

Also also, Pauline’s part slayed.

120/100

Lifeboat

…so… this is when Heather McNamara’s mask fully breaks and we see just how vulnerable and scared she is.

Every line of this song is just… wow. (Fun fact: My theater group back in high school was going to put on a Heathers musical despite none of us being able to sing and I was going to audition for Heather McNamara cause I really wanted to do this song but then… fucking pandemic ruined everything)

This song to me is one of the ultimate break-down-moment-song. You can truly feel Heather’s pain and panic and fear. She’s trapped in this role, has to play it to perfection or she knows that she’ll be replaced or left behind in an instant. She knows that Chandler never cared about her and would’ve had no problem kicking her to the curb. She knows that she can’t let people in without being torn down.

‘Everyone’s pushing, everyone’s fighting. Storms are approaching, there’s nowhere to hide. If I say the wrong thing, or I wear the wrong outfit, they’ll throw me right over the side!’ …I couldn’t even process this the first time I heard it.

I just love this song. In less than 2 minutes we get so much context and depth for Heather McNamara. I feel like McNamara at least to me is the most tragic character in this musical before Veronica joins the Heathers.

350/100 Will make you cry

Shine a Light (Reprise)

This song is… panic. That’s all I really have to say. This song is panic.

100/100

Kindergarten Boyfriend

This is definetely my least listened to song but I listened to it the other day and I wanted to slap myself cause like, why don’t I listen to this more often?

Along with McNamara, Martha is the other tragic character even before the story begins. (Though of course JD is THE tragic character of Heathers).

Martha is lonely and probably depressed, just really good at hiding it. Her best friend stabs her in the back to join the popular kids and she learns that her crush never liked her and was gay (or at least she believes that).

She looks back at the days before the kids learned about the ‘ideal man/woman’ before they started to care about that shit, when they were just kids. ‘Then he woke up.’ NO SWEETIE.

‘Now we’re all grown up and we know better… Certain boys are just for kindergarten. Certain girls are meant to be alone.’ Fuck me.

But yeah… this song in underrated and deserves more cause fuck is it sad.

200/100

Yo Girl

This one is just so much fun. And we get to see Chandler shine again.

‘Martha Dumptruck took a belly flop off the Old Mill Bridge last night holding a suicide note.’ Veronica horrified: ‘Oh my god is she dead?’ Mythic bitch Heather: ‘Just some broken bones! Just another geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably’

I love Heather so much.

And Veronica sees just how much this whole situation has snowballed. She feels so bad and regrets so much.

‘You’ve earned that red scrunchie, come join Heather in hell’ have me chills.

And of course, this sets us up for another JD song…

90/100

Meant to be Yours

I think you already know what I’m going to say about this one… VERONICA open the- open the door please-

I’m getting ahead of myself…

This is when we truly get to see JD become just absolutely unhinged. He goes a little crazy… and it’s amazing, I love it.

JD has slowly descended into madness. I think he loved having control for once in his life. Having the power to control the narrative of other people’s life for, what he thinks to be for the better.

He truly believes that killing everyone in the high school will make things better. And he wants Veronica by his side to do it ‘Bring marshmallows we’ll make s’more, we can smile and cuddle while the fire roars!’

Because their love is god. Their love can change the world. And maybe it could have in another life if they’d taken very different paths. If he’d become the lawyer he teased Veronica she’d marry someday.

But that’s not what happened.

Instead JD wants to take out all the pain he’s felt and tried to keep numb for so long. And he’s going to take it out on the people that hurt Veronica and made her feel excluded for so long.

He thinks he found the cure for the both of them, what will make them both better. And he’s desperate to have her by his side once more, ‘They made you blind messed up your mind but I can set you free’ ‘Finish what we begun’ ‘I am all that you need’.

And the best… ‘You carved open my heart! Can’t just leave me to bleed- VERONICA! Open the, open the door’ … ‘Veronica, sure, you’re scared I’ve been there I can set you free! Veronica don’t make me come in there. I’m gonna count to three! One, two- Fuck it!’

And then… he thinks Veronica, the only person he can trust, the only thing that’s right about this broken world, the person that he needs to go through with his plan… is dead. And it fully shatters him.

He needed her for the plan, but now that she’s gone, he’ll still pull through.

500/100

Dead Girl Walking (Reprise)

Veronica knows that she may be in a way responsible for JD becoming unhinged. But she’s going to make things right.

But, even as she faces him down and tells him to stop… she still loves him. She doesn’t know how this night will end. But she knows that she doesn’t want a tragic ending. She wants a soft story… but that’s not what she gets…

‘I wish your mom had been a little stronger. I wish she stayed around a little longer. I wish your dad were good, I wish grownups understood. I wish we met before they convinced you life is war. I wish you’d come with me!’

But JD has made his choice, ‘I wish I had more TNT.’

And to me ‘I wish we’d met before they convinced you life is war’ is the most painful line in this song… maybe in my top 5 lines of the entire musical. To me this line is kind of like, Our what if will always haunt me.

Because truly, what would have happened then? Would they have gotten their soft epilogue? We’ll never know.

300/100

I Am Damaged

Veronica said she chose JD in Seventeen. Here… JD choses Veronica. To make sure that she is safe.

He realizes that his ideas were wrong. That they’re both damaged… that’s he’s far too damaged. But he can see that Veronica isn’t. That she could still have a soft life… a happy ending. Even if he isn’t a part of it.

So he tells her to step back, to let him try and correct at least a little of what he did.

‘Hope you miss me, wish you’d kiss me’ … ‘And once I disappear, clean up the mess down here!’

And while he sings we hear Veronica pleading in the background, ‘Not this way.’ She doesn’t want to lose him. Even after everything.

250/100

Seventeen (Reprise)

Veronica is done. She has watched enough pain and suffering at the hands of stupid ideologies. She puts her foot down. Listen to me, we are done. We’ll lay our weapons down. Because at the end of the day all of us are scared and freaks in one way or the other.

And what’s important is they stick together with the people that matter.

When Martha asks her ‘Are there any happy endings?’

Veronica doesn’t know. But she does know that right now, she just wants to be Martha’s friend. To make up for everything. She just wants to be seventeen. She wants to be a teenager.

Maybe that will be enough for now.

And then… ‘If no one loves me now, someday somebody will’ because ouch. Because it’s true. Sometimes we’re alone. But sometimes isn’t forever.

(Has nothing to do with anything but I headcannon that McNamara joins Martha and Veronica and they form their own little trio cause that line ^ is all them)

Because at the end of the day, they’re teenagers. They still have time to find love. To love and to be loved. ‘Still time to make things right. One day, we’ll change the world, but let’s kick back tonight!’

‘Act like we’re all still kids, cause this could be our final chance!’

Seventeen (Reprise) is about… we still have time. So let’s make the most of it. Let’s let go, have fun. Let’s change for the better.

Let’s make things beautiful once more.

500/100

Ooooooffff hope you liked that cause this was a lot… but it was a lot of fun!

[leafy-mints]

Now!

"Now, do it now. While he's gassing himself to a palpable stupor, the timing's ideal and the moment is super, to ready and fire and blow the sick bastard away!"

This is the song Yuuji struggled with the most. Between the tempo speeding up at the end, getting a little too lost in Yuta's incredible acting, and stumbling over the faster lyrics.. He had a hard time keeping up.

They still didn't have all of their props yet, but Gojo instructed them to pretend like they had them anyway in order to get accustomed to acting with something in hand.

So now, Yuuji was also trying to remember to acknowledge the fake pistol in his right hand.

"Oh boy, Seymour, I am flying now!" Yuta starts with a loud laugh, "Oh, the things we're gonna do to your mouth.."

Yuuji has a moment where he remembers how nervous Yuta was and how hard everyone laughed at that line the very first time they did a read-through of this song.

"-I'll just take the mask off now and.."

Yuta hovers his hands around his head as he pretends to struggle taking a mask off of his head. Yuuji tries hard not to break character at the silliness of it.

The dark haired teen continues his crazed monologue with ease. He really is an incredible actor, Yuuji figures he'll make it big someday.

He also knows the section of the song he stumbles over the most his coming up. Focus, he tells himself.

"Why this whole thing strikes me funny, I don't know." Yuta is leaning against a counter, wheezing a little and chuckling in between lyrics.

"Cause it really is a rotten way to go!"

Here goes nothing. Yuuji takes a deep breath..

"What we have here is an ethical dilemma. Unless I help him get the mask removed, he doesn't have a prayer.."

His mouth is moving from sheer muscle memory at this point. He prays he's getting all the words right.

Yuuji can faintly hear Yuta belting his ad-libs and laughing, but he's much more focused on his own lines.

"..Couldn't shoot him if I tried, but the fates are on my side. I can off the guy by staying in the chair." Yuuji lets the last word rumble in his chest and basks in it for a moment.

He did it!

Now he can relax and listen to Yuta finish it off.

"Don't.. Be.. Fooled if I should chuckle like hyenas in a zoo.."

No one has truly adjusted to how perfectly Yuta has captured the insanity of the dentist character. Considering his usual personality, he plays Orin eerily well. He's incredibly versatile, Yuuji notes. Another trait of a great actor.

"All my vital signs are failing cause the oxide I'm inhaling makes it difficult," He falls to his hands and knees and wheezes hard, "As hell to catch my breath."

He sits back on his heels and faces the lawn chair Yuuji is sitting in.

"Are you dumb? Or hard of hearing?!"

He growls these lines with a hint of aggression Yuuji hasn't heard from him before. He flinches a little and quickly hopes Gojo didn't notice it.

"Are you satisfied?" Yuta yells, then dies off, "I've laughed myself to.."

Yuta reaches a trembling hand towards Yuuji, then brings both his hands to his face with desperation. He gasps and coughs a few more times before letting his body drop to the ground.

Yuuji looks out to the empty (except for Gojo and Geto) auditorium. Toge dims the stage lights and Megumi turns on the spotlight directly over the little lawn chair.

"Death?" Yuuji makes his voice tremble.

Everyone in the wings erupts with cheers and applause. Yuuji even catches Gojo and Geto clapping in the audience before the curtains close all the way. He feels a wave of relief wash over him.

• • • • • • • • • • • •

If you liked this, here's my JJK Theatre AU Masterlist!

[professorspork]

Any chance you'd actually want to do a breakdown of the writing and literary techniques you used in Newsbees? Any excerpt of your choice honestly, I'm always curious about how other writers think about their own work

A) I just want to say that what truly delights me is that this hit my inbox last night, a full 12 hours before the epilogue was posted (and contained within it a request for asks just like this). Way to read my mind! It made me happy!

B) Oh gosh this is so broad WHAT SHOULD I TALK ABOUT

okay after much dithering, using an online dice-rolling tool to pick a chapter to talk about and then being like 'this tool didn't pick the right chapter' I am going to talk about chapter 12, aka the romance novel bed-sharing one right before everything goes to shit.

Before we begin, you'll note that I still insist on calling a wolf at your door chapter 12 even though on AO3 it's chapter 13. I get why for coding reasons AO3 probably can't support calling a prologue "chapter zero" because something like 0/21+ is not a helpful chapter count in the same way 1/23 is but still the discrepancy chafes and I'm glad people have mostly indulged me on this point.

ANYWAY

Firstly, I'll point out that the chapter bears all of the usual hallmarks of what I know defines my prose and which I lean into with some degree of purpose. To pick a portion from the section on Blake's panic attack as an example:

She sinks shakily to the tile and curls into a ball to cry. After hours of gripping onto what remained of her sense with white-knuckled desperation, forcing herself to at least dissociate long enough to find a place to get out of the storm, she can’t fight it any more. Every single emotion she’s been barely keeping at bay—the powerlessness, the fear, the self-hatred, the sorrow—crashes through her all at once, bulldozing the fragile internal structures she’d relied upon to stay upright until there’s nothing inside her but splinters and wreckage.

It’s over. It’s over.

Gods, why won’t she fucking stop crying?

She bites down on her fist—anything to quiet the violent, hiccuping sobs that are wracking her lungs and depriving her of much-needed air—but it’s no use. You’ll wake everyone up, shut up, shut up, you stupid, sloppy bitch shut up.

Inane. Infantile.

Pathetic.

She has no idea how long she stays there, blubbering on the shower floor like a toddler. Time stretches like taffy, malleable and meaningless. She weeps until she’s empty; until even the derogatory, incisive shame is gone and only her hollow husk is left. And then…

…ever so slowly…

…cognizance creeps back in.

Apparently, she’s shivering.

The air in Yang’s apartment, which had felt near-stifling upon Blake’s arrival, is now crisp and biting against her clammy skin.

Gee, can you tell I like alliteration? In just this singular 226-word excerpt, there are eight uses of it (sinks/shakily; stupid/sloppy; inane/infantile; time/taffy; malleable/meaningless; hollow/husk; cognizance/creeps; crisp/clammy)-- and that number goes up, even, if you count incidental usage like 'with white-knuckled' or 'been barely.'

As I've matured as a writer I've shied away from prose that's florid just for prettiness' sake, but I do still indulge in this sort of... lyrical, tone-poem narration, especially in moments of great introspection or emotional import, as Blake's breakdown certainly is. All my writing-- not just dialogue-- is something I both hear and listen for, and the cadence and rhythm of the sentences is something I will tweak over and over and over again throughout the editing process until I'm satisfied with its flows and eddies. This is why I'll often use entirely unnecessary em-dashes to indicate breaths and pauses; to me, that sort of mouthfeel of the phrasing is just as important as the vocabulary is. Alliteration is a great way to get at that sort of smooth, elevated and heightened affect without being too conspicuous; my hope is that no one actually noticed "jesus christ there are eight alliterative pairs in this one half-page's worth of writing" until I pointed it out. It's... a flavor, a seasoning, that provides a bit of lift.

This excerpt also provides a few examples of another favorite thing of mine, which is pairing TWO adjectives for specificity's sake (and that sort of breathing meter). Blake's sobs could have been violent or hiccuping instead of both, but using both gives their brutality and physical embodiment emphasis; time being both malleable and meaningless shows two different facets of the sort of warping she's experiencing; her shame being both derogatory and incisive gets at how it hits both emotionally/verbally and internally/physically. (That's twice there I've said how I want the words to feel physical, to put you in Blake's shoes, and that's also very much a hallmark of my writing and this work specifically. There's a reason Blake throws up or nearly throws up so many times in this story, including in this chapter. I wanted her anxiety to feel LIVED IN, this toxic thing that her body literally has to reject and expel any way it can.)

The last thing this excerpt has that I want to remark upon is an incredibly considered simile-- how Blake's panic attack "crashes through her all at once, bulldozing the fragile internal structures she’d relied upon to stay upright until there’s nothing inside her but splinters and wreckage." I think it's always a worthwhile project to come up with metaphors that haven't been used a thousand times, because readers deserve novelty and forethought, but I really considered how I wanted to portray her feelings here. In other chapters, I compare Blake's panic/trauma to a treacherous ocean filled with dangerous creatures, or to a runaway train; Yang, of course, gets her big moment where she feels like a volcano. All of these things are scary and unpleasant, but they are so in radically different ways. Whereas the ocean metaphor is sort of all about depth and playing the long game, getting dragged under and the process of erosion, I wanted this one to be sudden and impactful. The first thing I came up with was a tornado, but that a) felt a little tired to me and b) still came from the natural world, which didn't feel quite right. The sort of manmade, architectural language I ended up going with reinforced far better the point I was making: that Blake built and constructed her sense of calm purposefully, and it was now being torn down by someone else's violent efforts.

PHEW okay I think that's enough talking about that one small section.

Overall, the chapter also contains a lot of the sorts of tricks and modes I relied on throughout the fic-- playing around with time, explicitly referencing callbacks to earlier in the story, the Adam that lives in Blake's head. This chapter is also, of course, the debut of The Font, which was really fun for me. Blake falling asleep instantly in Yang's bed after two dozen chapters of how bad her insomnia is was a payoff that had been in the outline from the earliest stages. The Hug is both important in its own right but also a reference to yet another musical, Waitress ("I hope someday, somebody wants to hold you for twenty minutes straight..."). Seeing as this is a Newsies adaptation, I wanted it to feel in many ways LIKE A MUSICAL-- to have those big, bold feelings-- but the one thing Newsies isn't is a romance, and I found myself thinking often of love songs from other shows to sort of fill in those gaps. That could honestly be its own post so I won't get into it more now, lol.

OKAY MY GOODNESS THIS IS GETTING LONG I'M GONNA CUT IT OFF THERE. But I hope that was interesting for folks, and if so PLEASE ASK ME MORE QUESTIONS I LOVE QUESTIONS.

[womenareonline]

The 1975 still...at their very...

I was going to be on a low budget. I knew this when I bought the tickets. I knew maybe I would have to sell them. But I didn’t. I booked the low-cost plane train and hotels. 

And I am so glad I did. A day in Madrid and a day in Paris. 

I met some people in the line who were also alone. That’s the thing about seeing niche smallish artists. To quote Matty “They are the biggest band no one has ever heard of”. Every time someone asked me who I was seeing they were like: Who? It was so funny because the place was packed. 

I’m writing this as a journalistic chronicle which I low-key hate.

I wanted to talk about music, art, and live music. I wanted to talk about that feeling you get when you’re surrounded by people who are there for the same purpose. Because you all love the same music. All of us dress in black, Doctor Martens, converse, and vans. Rectangles everywhere.  This was my third time seeing The 1975 but my first time outside a festival and everyone is right. Their shows are insane. It’s not only the band's energy but everyone around you. All the people around you just get it. They understand all this music. We had this bond who just got this music and what it all meant.  

I’m sure you’ve seen online all the viral shit that goes on at shows. There is still a lot of uncertainty about what it all means. But that doesn’t take away from the fact that the show is a whole experience. The theater and movie themes. The media consumption themes. 

It's also of course about the music. The magnetic music. I don’t get it when people say it all sounds the same because you can have a punk rock song like People and then an acoustic almost country one like The Birthday Party (my favorite one). I could go on about the 1975 music production (thanks George Daniel). But hearing their music live is also a whole ocuurance. They don’t miss for a second, and they transmit this beautiful energy that just either gets you dancing or moves you. I used to hate TOOTIMETOOTIME but it’s truly such a fun experience live. Everyone just gets dancing and screaming the lyrics. And they make that, The 1975 does that.

If I have to note some of my favorite moments: 

- When Matty gets on the roof and sings probably one of the most heartbreaking songs ever “Me”. There is something very heartbreaking to hear him sing “Oh I was thinking about killing myself, don’t you mind?” On top of a roof where you can barely make up his face. I did cry the second night I saw them. 

- The 1975 are known for mixing up their setlist, it’s a surprise every time you see them. Hearing So Far It’s Alright (which for me is a masterpiece of songwriting from Matty) which I did not expect in Paris was truly a great experience. I also got a sneaky You and Chocolate in Madrid which also surprised me.  

- When I saw the Paris date I was like “They have to play Paris there", which is one of my favorite songs of all time. Of course, they did (tbh Matty Healy is such a troll that I wouldn’t put it past him to not include it). That was another moment I cried a bit because that was the moment I realized how worth it all was. I realize that getting on that flight, and spending my money on this when I’m struggling a bit, was so worth it. When my plane was moving a lot that day all I could think was “Oh my god, why am I doing this?” And at that moment I realized why. Because I wanted this experience. I wanted to listen to Paris in Paris, one of my favorite songs in one of my favorite cities. I booked the plane tickets and hotel after I saw a tweet one day that said: “Not once in my life did I regret spending money on an experience (a trip, concert, a nice dinner, etc.) be the money always comes back but this is what life is about”. I just realized at that moment why I was there. Why I spent my money on this for this exact moment.

- Before they played Paris (which is about drugs) Matty gave a very good speech about the trouble of drugs and letting us all know he has been clean from heroin for 5 years and the crowd cheered. The beautiful and overwhelming feeling when a few minutes later he sings “as the crowd cheers for an overdose”. That was a very heart-wrenching moment. We are all proud and happy for you, Matty

I get PCD (post-concert depression) but I get post-concert happiness. Where in those moments and a few days afterwards I get this feeling of happiness of being alive. Like I get to be alive at the time as all these performers. I get to do all this stuff and see all these beautiful shows and listen to this music live. I realize being alive it’s very much worth it because of all these feelings. I realize it’s fine to spend money on this thing when you are going to feel this joy and experience all these overwhelming beautiful feelings. So book the flight and get those concert tickets.

[stacyswirl]

Once again, the list was pretty much sorted by early February, but it took me a while to write up the post.  Here's my notes on my Top 15 albums of 2023!

15. Metallica - 72 Seasons

I haven't truly loved a Metallica album since last century, and their previous album, 2016's "Hardwired... To Self Destruct" was exceptionally boring to me.  Modern day Metallica songs are mostly long and kinda repetitive, without much of the inventive structure that made their classic material great, nor their occasional experimentation and pop chops that boosted the best of their ‘90s music.  72 Seasons is a bit better than Hardwired, it's more on par with 2008's "Death Magnetic".  The reason it manages to make the list though is the final song, "Inamorata".  An 11 minute long epic complete with a wah-pedaled slow solo in the middle.  It is very reminiscent of their trio of epics from 1996's "Load" album; "Bleeding Me", "Thorn Within" and "The Outlaw Torn".  Metallica hasn't made a song that sounded like this in nearly 30 years, and it just fills me with such happiness.

14. Pierce the Veil - The Jaws of Life

A truly strange album.  It's kind of like... if My Chemical Romance were simultaneously more poppy and more heavy?  There are some truly deep, heavy metal moments on this album, mixed in amongst the screamo vocals and tiktok trap beats.  It's a very modern mix of genres , which is why I think of this album as carrying the nu-metal torch in a way.  The first song I heard was a relatively soft pop-rock single called "Emergency Contact", it really reminds me of Placebo. 

13. Olivia Rodrigo - Guts

Olivia's debut "Sour" was a great pop-punk punch to the gut in 2021.  Her followup has a few really great tracks (the first three especially; "All-American Bitch", "Bad Idea Right?" and "Vampire") but the album as a whole hasn't grabbed me as strongly as Sour did.  Still good though.

12. Alex Lahey - The Answer is Always Yes

A great straight ahead rock record, Alex Lahey's third album is really fun and chill.  The opener "Good Time" has laid-back swagger reminiscent of Beck, and lyrics espousing how everyone needs a good time after the last few years have been so rough for us all.  She has a wonderful punk edge to her voice, but can sing a very pretty melody when called for.  The music has gained some extra layers since her debut in 2017, there's occasional pleasing fuzz tones to the guitar.  This album has some pretty indie rock ballads amidst the fun rockers too.  A really well-rounded rock record.

11. Paramore - This Is Why

I've never really connected with Paramore, they seem like a great pop-punkish group that I should like but I just never got into them in a big way.  This new album (their sixth) does something a little different than I've heard before.  Exemplified by the title track "This Is Why", they've brought a jagged, start-stop new wave sound to the music.  Recently I've listened to a bunch of old Talking Heads and Blondie, and "This Is Why" has a similar sonic pallette to those late '70s/early '80s weirdos.  It was intriguing enough to get my foot in the door and enjoy everything this band had on display.  A very unique and interesting album, great to erratically dance to.

10. Blink-182 - One More Time...

My first favorite band, my first concert, Blink-182 have been a very important soundtrack to my life.  I didn't dislike their last two albums without founding member Tom Delonge, and did not foresee this reunion actually happening any time soon.  That said, I'm glad it finally happened.  Their first song released from it "Edging" was a little stupid, and didn't make me expect too much.  But then in September they released the video for the title track "One More Time..." and I cried while watching it.  This stupid pop punk band has meant so goddamn much to me over the years, and this song delves into their personal history and breakups and makeups.  Just hearing Mark and Tom trade vocals on a beautiful ballad like this feels so good.  The album has a lot of songs, 17 in total, but being punk songs the whole album is still only 44 minutes.  I'd say the album as a whole skews closest to their 2003 Self-Titled album in sound.  Which most people probably consider their creative peak, so it's not a bad choice.  Who knows what will happen in the future, but I'm glad these guys got together one more time at least.  I'm seeing them in concert this summer, for a full-circle nostalgic trip.  It's good to have them back for however long it lasts.

9. Metric - Formentera II

Metric put out a "part 2" of sorts to my 2022 album of the year.  It has a gloriously catchy, synthy sound mixed with their signature smooth guitar sound.  There's a lot to love on this album, from the meandering soft rock of "Days of Oblivion" to the disco swagger of cheating anthem "Just The Once".  I'm so glad this band has continued to thrive for over 20 years, it seems they'll never lose their effortless cool.

8. K.Flay - Mono

2022's Inside Voices/Outside Voices album was a creeper hit for me, I listened to it more and more over time.  I was still in full fledged fandom mode for it when she put out Mono.  I listened to a little bit of it but it took several months before I seriously gave this album a chance.  It has won me over big time.  I'm impressed by how big and loud so much of it is, especially the song "Irish Goodbye" featuring the singer/guitarist of Pierce the Veil.  It uses dubstep-like drops in its chorus that never fails to make me bang my head.  It's not all big guitars though, there's lots of her softer, weirder songs too.  "Spaghetti" is a wandering stoner monologue of a song, set to '90s alternative guitar and a simple boppy drumbeat.  K.Flay has consistently put out weird, interesting music that mixes her punk-white-girl-rapper past persona with the complicated experimental soundscapes of her elder millennial existence.

7. Kesha - Gag Order

The final album that Kesha had to make under her record contract that connects her to her abuser, Kesha pulls no punches on it.  She enlisted legendary producer Rick Rubin for this album, and it's unlike anything she's done before.  Swirling cold synths and tinkling acoustic guitars surround her natural voice while an ominous deep robotic bass throbs underneath.  This is the music of PTSD, a survivor being supported to tell her truth.  It's a very powerful statement, I recommend the visualizer video for "Eat the Acid", it's surprisingly intense in its simplicity.  Lyrically I also really like the song "Hate Me Harder", for anyone who wants to stand up to their haters or abusers.

6. Fall Out Boy - So Much (For) Stardust

Fall Out Boy has taken me many years to appreciate.  I really liked their 2015 album American Beauty/American Psycho, and a couple of their previous album's hits, but hadn't gone much deeper.  But within the last year I've fallen in love with both their first greatest hits collection (of their music from 2002-2009) and this, their newest album.  It has everything I love about Fall Out Boy and more.  They take the pop-punk-emo playbook of the early 2000s and inject it with a sweeping, cinematic epic quality that is hard to quantify but instantly pulls me in.  The song "Hold Me Like a Grudge" is so ridiculously catchy, they've injected a slight disco-riffic quality, with a danceable bassline and handclaps.  Handclaps for God's sake!  I can't not dance around when this song is on.  As for that epic quality I mentioned, the song "Heaven, Iowa" has it on full display, going from a soft crooning intro into a full blown prog explosion over the course of its 4 minutes.  They've got my full attention now, and I am listening intently.

5. Crosses - Goodnight, God Bless, I Love U, Delete.

Deftones' gothy synthwave side project Crosses finally puts out a second full length album ten years after their first.  It's a bit more dynamic, a bit more electronic than their debut, big and booming, sexy and dark.  I took Phoenix to see them in concert earlier this year and this sound was so cool to hear live.  Chino's sexy, ethereal whisper-to-a-scream voice is on full display, dancing on top of the pulsing beats and sharp synths.  Listening to Crosses makes me feel like I'm in an underground vampire club in the late 80s, hoping to be bitten by a femme fatale in sunglasses and patent leather.

4. Cannons - Heartbeat Highway

Cannons shot out of nowhere for me in 2022, with their debut album landing at #2 on my list of that year.  Their retro dream pop that captivated me then is in full force again on their sophomore effort.  It took me a little while to warm up to, at first I was a little disappointed because it seemed so similar.  But it didn't take long for that to not be a con at all, and now I am completely in love with this album, just like I was with their first.  I can see the small differences, and appreciate both albums on their individual merits.  This album has consistently been one of my top listened to in the car, their soft soothing sound has been there for me when I need something to make me feel better.

3. Various Artists - Barbie Soundtrack / Mark Ronson - Barbie Score

The Summer's movie hit was also a gigantic musical hit for me and my whole family.  The soundtrack had some instant classics, including Lizzo's adorable "Pink" and "Pink (Bad Day)" and Dua Lipa's modern pop disco anthem "Dance the Night" (easily one of my most played songs of the whole year).  Ryan Gosling's breakaway book number "I'm Just Ken" and hilariously over-the-top cover of "Push" always brought a smile to our faces.  It's so much fun to sing along with his mushy mouth vocals.  Billie Eilish's piano whispery wonder-anthem "What Was I Made For?" somehow embodied the message of the movie perfectly and always gave me a chill when I heard it.  Most of the rest of the soundtrack was filled with modern pop tracks that ranged from kinda meh tik-tok autotune pop to really engaging fun songs ("Choose Your Fighter" and "Man I Am" being highlights of the latter).  This brings me to the score.  Mark Ronson, retro producer known for his work with Amy Winehouse and Bruno Mars, has taken the colorful plastic world of Barbie and given it a '70s sunshine and lollipops soundscape to match.  Many songs are of a piece with the Lizzo and Dua Lipa tracks, which he also produced, and by the time of "Beach Off" he's in full '80s technicolor soundtrack mode.  There are softer bits too, he uses Billie Eilish's pianoline as a soft introspective theme for the film's quieter moments several times.  This score has been wonderful to put on in the background while working or cleaning, it picks me right up, never bores, and always has something new to hear.

2. Linkin Park - Lost Demos

I'll admit this isn't a normal album.  But its significance can not be understated.  It begins with "Lost", a 2002 era song, fully finished but cut from their second album Meteora and subsequently forgotten about.  Meteora has always been my favorite LP album, and being able to "go home again" and hear a new track with that perfect early-'00s nu-metal blend of rough guitars and smooth electronic production was great.  LP hadn't sounded like this in years.  Of course, the real draw was the late Chester Bennington's unique emotional howl, unheard on new material since his sad passing in 2017 (the day after my birthday of that year).  "Lost" dominated radio last year, and rightfully so.  The next two songs on the album are standard Linkin Park songs, juxtaposing Mike's rap verses with Chester's emotionally charged choruses in a wonderful showcase of the band's musical alchemy.  After that are some songs that do include vocals but are clearly a little less fully realized.  The bulk of the rest of the album are demos of Meteora era songs, some with alternate lyrics and completely different ideas on display.  Taken as a whole it's not as strong as a full studio album could be.  It is instead an interesting complement to Meteora and a welcome window into a past that we'll never be able to fully enter into again.  RIP Chester, thank you for bringing us one more badass banger from the archives to remind us of your legacy.  And thank you Mike for packaging it into this alternate historical document of an album.

1. Dessa - Bury the Lede

Dessa's transformation into pop princess intelligentsia has taken its largest step ever.  The first steps were taken on 2018's "Jumprope", followed by the gloriously giddy 2021 song "I Already Like You" (included on this album).  Her sophisticated wordplay and quick rap skills are still front and center on almost every song.  Now they are accompanied by bright and catchy beats, with zippy melodies that infuse the album with a bubblegum sweetness, all floating amongst the feminist smarts and vulnerable feelings on display.  My favorite song has to be "Tell Me Again", with its amazing '80s synthpop sound complete with handclaps and saxophone overdubs.  Opener "Hurricane Party" showcases her witty political commentary rap over a unique bell-clangs and skittering-synth-hits beat.  Every song has something new, Dessa is in full experimental mode, throwing the pop playbook at the wall and seeing what works best to amplify her intense songwriting so that her audience will think and dance at the same time.

[ironic-sonder]

I'm subjecting everyone on my main to my very important commentary of metal songs that my best friend has sent me. bc the list has been backlogged. for two months

I'll put them under the cut bc it'll be long & really only just for him. hello dearest @assignedjimmymagmakinnie

Resist & Bite by Sabaton

I'll listen to it a couple times bc there's a lot of road noise. I forgot how much I love his voice & the energy & holy fucking shit. How didn't your ex like this. What the fuck. Sylas what the fuck. It sounds like how hearing your laugh feels. Vibrant & tangibly full of life. I'll focus sorry. You'd be very good at teaching history. Focusing now. There's a clinking noise in the back of the chorus. Like a bell or something. Also the guitar is cool as fuck. The way his voice jumps between clear & growling is so like,,,, going feral over it. Guitar solo!!! Oh fuck it's layered. Insane going insane. Wheeeee noises. The drums are also great bc they're just like,,,, driving. I want you to explain the battle they're singing about to me. The song feels like it's buzzing a bit in my teeth. The lyrics are great no I did not process any of them. Truly still just trying to wrap my head around his voice & how much excitement is in it, holt fucking shit. Goddamn. He sounds psyched to sing about this. In a respectful way but also just. Damn they're all nerds. They have you energy. Badass but super knowledgeable about things & excited to share it. Anyway 10/10, it gets a 10

Defence of Moscow by Sabaton

This one already feels more theatrical, like it'd be in a movie trailer. How do they make music like this & release it & we never hear it on the radio. Also the beat dropped & I had to stop typing for a sec bc it was so overwhelmingly good. His accent is so fun. The way words fit in his mouth? Incredible. Amazing. I'm gonna listen to it while reading the lyrics & then relisten & type commentary. Side note though the keys that their songs are in legitimately make me want to scream (/pos). There's a keyboard in the background I think? Fucking love everything it does. I have it on full volume bc of the road noise & holy shit Sylas. I think getting tickets to see them in person would be overwhelmingly just. Yeah. Yeah it would change a person. Life altering. The rhythms of the chorus!!! The way the lyrics work around each other!!! The drums driving it with the guitar!! I wanna learn music theory properly just so I can say a bunch of smart words about it. Fuck fuck the way he leads into the chorus. I like how there's a drum solo right before the guitar one. Wheeeeeee guitar noises. There's something so happy about it. How do they manage to sound so happy. Yeah yeah major key but it's more than that. Fuck the drums right after they sing with no instrumental backing. I'm very normal about everything. Jesus fucking christ. AND ALSO THE WAY IT ENDS. 10/10 also, bc yes

Hypnosis by Sleep Token

Technically Christmas Truce is next but I don't want this all to be me yelling about Sabaton so that'll go in the next post. This is in the same album as Fall for Me. I like how dense the intro is, like. You can hear the guitar but the drums & buzzing practically drown you in noise. Like thunder!!! It feels like a mix of listening to ocean at night & also thunder. His voice hangs on notes so interestingly. Dragging them around. His silly ack noise on the K of take. It's not precisely sultry but it feels deliberate like that. Haha dense noise back. Makes my brain feel buzzy. Not in a happy static way, just the noise vibrations. Also I'm on a very bumpy road now. The way he's incomprehensible on some words but super clear on others. There's something so captivating about it. Alright yeah I can understand the worship & such. Also the way this song is about hypnosis & he drags words around in a very circular way, like how a pendulum swings. Stylistic music things <3. Drummmmms. I wonder if this ranked on the sexiest Sleep Token songs list. Haha called it, it was third. I'm gonna read your commentary on it after it's over. This guitar solo sounds so dark & grainy it's amazing. Heavy & gravelly. Silly noises at the end!! It sounds a bit like a carnival in a horror movie. Spooky bells. 9.3/10 I think, very good but difficult to fully appreciate in the car

Hades by Bathory

Well first off the album art is cool as fuck. ALSO. This sounds much more like the older metal songs I used to review. Haha it's from the 80s, called it. The guitar texture. OH IT GOT CLEARER. That was fun. And the drums the drums. His voice is so buried but I'm more preoccupied with the drums. It's squeaky & growly, like a silly little creature. That tone cannot be good for his vocal chords. I wonder what his speaking voice sounds like. It's extremely fun though. Drums drums. And the way the guitar sounds like the way a sound wave looks. Up & down & very long & consistent & constant. The rhythm is fascinating, like it's on the edge of slowing down or speeding up. Slightly offbeat. I'm upset it was so short, it's losing some points for that, but looping it would definitely improve that. I wonder what you said when you sent it. Inconclusive, the screenshot just said you'd pre-approved it. But anyways yes 8.8/10, fun but too short, wanted to hear the drums more

[sierratitta]

Star vs the forces of evil skeleton fall fall fall

#Star vs the forces of evil skeleton fall fall fall cracked#

#Star vs the forces of evil skeleton fall fall fall driver#

The sluggish and highly unhelpful sloth employees are a constant source of this as long as you pay for your items and don't wreck the store.

#Star vs the forces of evil skeleton fall fall fall cracked#

A crazed goblin thinks he's cracked the incredibly arcane organizing system of Quest Buy: "Housewares is that way!" He then turns right around and runs into a wall.The source of the wand's power? A tiny unicorn running on a tiny treadmill.

#Star vs the forces of evil skeleton fall fall fall driver#

Right before pounding on the driver side window and screaming about how they're going to die, which they can't hear because they're singing too loud.

Also, Star taking the time to magic up a seatbelt so she can stay secure on the roof of the Diaz van.

It got to the point where she was so into the search that she blows off the fact that Buff-Frog, one of Ludo's henchmen, was spying on her while she was spying on Gustav.

Let's just say it ended with her incoherently babbling at Marco in front of a conspiracy corkboard that takes up a WALL of her room.

The absurd lengths that Star went to to try and catch Gustav in his scheme and what it did to her psyche is truly a sight to behold.

a tiny pink spider in a top hat, which scurries away.

Star, in a fit of jealousy, boasts "I can make stuff too!" and conjures up.

If the pictures on the wall are any indication, the Diaz family apparently didn't see anything strange with taking in a robot and a llama as "exchange students".

Marco and Gustav's ridiculous Secret Handshake.

Said mutant then grabs a random student and flies off with him.

Hearing that Marco would like a little more danger in his life, Star decides to do the charitable thing and mutates a wayward butterfly into a hideous monster.

Marco's first look at Star she's trying to gnaw the water fountain into submission.

"And you said there was no magic on Earth!" like light switches and drinking fountains.

Star's fascination with Earth technology.

The most Marco's gloating gets is an annoyed, "Would you just go already?!" from his teacher - just because he thought to ask for a hall pass before leaving.

Even better, no one is paying attention to him.

and his frustration when he realizes Skeeves just wants him to look after Star because he's such a Nice Guy.

Marco bragging about being taken to the principal's office.

And what Principal Skeeves plans on doing with the chest of jewels he got: "Now I'm off to the ice cream shop.

Skeeves gets Dollar-Bill Eyes) She is going to love it here! Star: (Playing with the light switch) And you said there was no magic on Earth! Skeeves: So, you say you're from another dimension. Olga's Reform School for Wayward Princesses".

Every time Marco gets called "Princess Marco" ever since "St.

Mainly due to her very limited knowledge on Earth.

Any time Star is forced to not use magic tends to be hilarious.

A good majority of the facial expressions in this show count.

In the first intro, Star and Marco run up to a giant worm monster that's just emerged from the ground.then as the lyrics go "Gonna have a good time!", the monster's eyes light up like disco balls and everyone briefly dances.

note Then again, when we actually see the school. Olga's Reform School for Wayward Princesses is brought up, it's always followed by lightning, said character who doesn't want to be sent there screaming, and a shot of them being "sucked" (by a strangely out of place conveyor belt) into said school with the gate closing behind them.

The way she even screams "MARCO!" becomes really funny after a while.

Star's mannerisms and actions in general count due to her sheer joy and excitement about everything.

[sharixinsanity]

The Legend of Hades' Beast by Shari X Insanity

The Legend of Hades' Beast by Shari X Insanity

Author's Note: Hello, all. I'm Shari X Insnaity, and this is my Poetry Page. This is my second post here in this type of forum.

I used to post in Facebook's Notes Section, but that feature is now defunct, so this brings me here. You have all stumbled upon my poetry journal blog.

I'm going to be posting here often, so please be on the look out for more original poems, written by me, Shari X Insanity.

Please refrain from stealing, or copying, without my permission, or consent.

This post is a second post for Poetober, Poetober is like an Inktober, but instead artists, this is for poets, and there's also no prompts, just a theme--- horror genre, Edgar Allan Poe style techinque, Halloween, Spooky Season. Happy Poetober everyone, to all!

Subscribe, like, comment, reshare, onto other social media platforms, or follow this tumblr page/account/blog/journal, to check out for more Shari X Insanity poetry in the future!

The first Poetober poem, tumblr blog post was The Legend of Satan's Thirst, and this second post is called, The Legend of Hades' Beast.

You can either jump ahead to the poem which are Word DocX pics, PDF to JPEG pics, which are attached to this post, or you can skip ahead and read the caption, which are copy & pasted lyrics, and read along.

All poems are original poems written by sincerely yours truly, Shari X Insanity, and all copyrights are reserved to the poet, author, artist, writer, Shari X InsanityⒸ.

I'll be posting every Friday and/or Saturday. I hope you all will enjoy reading this, as I did writing this. Enjoy!

The Legend of Hades' Beast By Shari X Insanity

There’s a fiery that burns under my skin

An evil beast that I have kept within

I will be the fearsome demon that has ever been

I will be your worst nightmare

That you have ever met

 As my hair turns red

Eyes turn black

Too late, there’s no turning back

My tongue licks my lips

Your gaze already locked

It is time for me to be fed

 As my anger, vengeance, and rage

Builds up ounce by ounce

I can feel my demon heart bounce

I can hear my vicious thoughts race

So fast, so incredibly fast

 What is left of my soul

Right now are fighting to gain control

But it doesn’t stand a chance

Against the evil that boils inside

My human self won’t last

 Now that I have succumb

To my inner demon

That I have always hid from

I have become . . .

 The Beast!

Finally the beast is set free!

So, let’s begin the feast!

Stay away, stay away from me!

Because I have become my beast!

          You can’t run, you can’t hide

I am now embracing the demon

That I have always kept leashed inside

I can feel myself sinking

Sinking under more

I can see clearly the black, blood red gates

Of the Underworld

 Meeting me on the other side

Charon, the silent mysterious hooded cloak man

He nods his head with no words ever spoken

Taken all my golden tokens

His boat guides us down the river of Styx

 Sitting high and mighty on his throne

Hades, the ruler of all the pits of the Underworld

Once I am near him, I bow down

As soon as I get back up from my knees and the ground

He has a mischievous, wicked yet seductive smile

Creeping across his face

He has long black hair that covers his alluring eyes

 I should be afraid but I am not

Instead my stomach and heart are caught in a knot

His skin is pale and flawless

Hades’ beauty leaving me speechless

 Hades’ smile is still seen

Dark eyes staring down at me

Because he’s proud and pleased

Of his new, precious beast.

[sugarylawliet]

no good for me (light yagami x reader)

i’m back lol

> warnings: smut, degradation, spit kink, inappropriate use of the death note, VERY toxic relationship, song fic kinda, lyrics are in bold and italics, based off of diet mountain dew by lana del ray

> tag list: @ygm1slt @cradiot28

❛ you’re no good for me, baby you’re no good for me ❜

Nothing on this earth scared you more than the man you were about to see; the pretty boy brunette flaunting good grades and a picturesque family life whose facade of ambitious, respectful young man was a mask almost no one could see through. Some people felt dread at the thought of spiders or snakes, felt fear in their stomach imagining the paranormal, shadow ghosts or criminal stalkers invading their comfort zones. None of these perfectly rational fears scared you the way Light Yagami scared you. There was no fear to be had at the thought of something undesirable creeping its way into your privacy or comfort zone, because Light had manipulated his way into your comfort and trust long ago. He was scarier than a murderer ready to kill at an urge’s call, his blood lust hid in shadows behind his golden boy facade, his words were tools and his touches were negotiations. You couldn’t trust a single thing that came from his mouth, you often questioned your own sanity. Light Yagami had a terrifying grip on you, and it was exactly what he wanted.

Your eyes scan over the text Light had sent you for the millionth time, the words almost ingrained in your head at this point.

Come to my house. We need to talk. 

You were sure he kept his words vague on purpose, yet another tactic to keep you at his disposal out of pure fear. You weren’t exactly sure if you loved Light anymore; what was your definition of love at this point? You loved him, yes, but was it out of obligation? Was it survival instinct?

It was true, in the beginning you had loved Light purely and truly. You believed his ambition was justice, to make the world a better and safer place for you. But as time went on, “Kira doesn’t kill innocents” began racking up more and more exceptions, and as the twisted justifications spilled from his mouth, so did the gaslighting. Over and over, his sweet words convinced you to keep coming back. His empty promises were a drug and you were addicted. 

His text, you were sure, was a reference to this fizzling out of your love for him. He could sense it, and surely he must have found out you were planning on leaving. You weren’t planning on revealing that he’s Kira- that would cause more commotion you were not interested in being a part of- no, you simply wanted to move states, get away and forget about Light Yagami, forget about Kira and Ryuzaki and Ryuk and everything that has overtaken your life. However, if he did find out your plans to skip town, you may just have to reveal that he’s Kira for safety measures.

❛ you’re no good for me, but baby i want you ❜

Hestiently, you opened the door you had been staring at blankly for what felt like hours. Light had been staying in an upscale hotel during the investigation, so maybe the other tenants could hear you if you screamed for help; the overdramatic thought brought you comfort. 

You walk in the room, closing the door behind you. You’re met with the sight of Light’s back as he sits in the rolling chair across the room. In the absence of any words, without even seeing his face, you know he’s mad. Every slight change of Light’s emotions could strangle a whole room by tension alone; his aura manipulated the feeling in the air, which served as a helpful alarm to know when he is upset. And man, is he upset.

You open your mouth to greet him, but he cuts you off, spinning around in his chair to face you, “Don’t talk.” You nod and close your mouth. Why do you even listen to what he says?

“I knew I couldn’t trust you. From the very beginning I knew you would run that pretty little mouth of yours. I know you’re planning on leaving. And then what? Telling the first news outlet you see that I’m Kira?”

“No Light,”

“I said don’t talk.” He stands up from his chair, “If you tell everyone, you’ll also have to tell on yourself. Imagine what everyone would think of you if they knew...You knew I was Kira and you still dated me, you defended me, you kept my secret, you even got on your knees for me. Are you gonna tell that to the media? That you let Kira fuck you?”

You purse your lips, restraining yourself from talking back. You knew it would only make things worse, but you couldn’t stand the way he talked down on you and expected you to take it. 

“Come here.” He motioned to his desk and you followed, sitting on his lap per his instruction. He placed the death note open on the desk, handing you the pen. With one hand gripping yours and the other on your hip, he began to guide your hand, the pen spilling out the first letter of your name on the pages.

❛ do you think we’ll be in love forever? ❜

“N-No, Light, you can’t do this, please.” You begged, your heart rate quickening as you realize what he was doing. It can’t end like this, it just can’t.

“Shhh, just write. That’s it, baby. This is what bad girls get, you see?” His death grip tightened on your hand as he spelled out your name, the last letters leering closer and closer before you could register the implications of what he was doing. This was it, this was really it.

Light lets his free hand wander up to your jawline, pulling your face closer to yours and enveloping you in a kiss as he wrote the last letter of your name. You shake your head with a whine, however he disregards your concerns and runs his hand on your upper thigh. 

“What’s the matter, Y/n? Don’t wanna spend your last moments with me?~” His nose kisses your neck, and the soft, sensual gestures almost make you forget your life was quite literally slipping away at every second that ticked by. 40 seconds. You had 40 seconds to do something.

You jump off of Light’s lap, reality rushing to your lungs as you felt your world closing in. Your pants become heavier, harsh air ripping through your throat as if they were the last breaths you would ever take because, well- they were.

Your head felt buzzing and dizzy as you fell to your knees, crawling towards Light who had spun around in his chair so his back was facing you; completely apathetic. After all you’ve been through together, after all you’ve done for him, nothing. Nothing at all. 

You crawl closer, grasping towards the notebook Light held in his hands, your weakness limiting your reach as anxiety stole your clearness of mind. He only  chuckles at your meek attempts to save your own life. Your head was racing as your nervousness blacked out everything in the room except for the little black notebook your boyfriend had a death grip on; ‘I’m running out of time, I’m going to die, I need the death note, I need to cross my name out, I need it I need it I need it I-’

“Goodbye, Y/N. You were fun to play with for a while.” Light kisses your nose with an arrogant smirk, peeling your hands off from his lap and wrists before checking his watch, signaling your last few seconds. 

You quit your pitiful attempts to grab the notebook and instead push yourself further and further away from Light until your back hit the wall, lacing your fingers tightly in your hair as you cried your last moments away. 

“5, 4, 3 2...” Light spoke.

“No no no no no, please god,” You cried out, squeezing your eyes shut in preparation for the pangs you would soon feel in your chest.

“1...”

And

Nothing.

You breathe. You let the air flood your lungs; it shouldn’t be possible. You dare to open your eyes, revealing the same scene. You, pathetically on the floor with tears down your face, Light before you in his chair with his head thrown back in a maniacal laugh. 

He tossed the death note down to you, like a dog being thrown a bone. You frantically grab it and flip to the newest page, your name scratched out with two thick lines. 

You were alive- no, he let you live.

❛ hit me my darling tonight, i don’t know why but i like it

“Well?” Light asks expectingly, standing up from his chair and kicking it to the side of the room. You look up at him questioningly, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as tears still brimmed your eyes from the just-curved anxiety attack.

“No ‘thank you’? I spared your life even after you betrayed me- lied to me. You’re so ungrateful.”

“I, I-” You found it difficult to shape your words with your hitching breath. You inhale deeply, eyes closed, calming down, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Light.”

Why were you even apologizing?

“I’m so sorry, please, just take me back. I’m sorry.” The words spilled from your mouth so quickly simply because they felt right. You needed to apologize, you did wrong, you need to be good. You wanted him back more than anything so you can be good.

❛ scary, my god, you’re divine ❜

“That’s right,” Light smiled, his voice softening unnaturally, “Now, how about you come over here and show me just how sorry you are.”

You hesitate for a second before crawling over to him. You sit obediently with your legs beneath your thighs on the floor in front of him.

“Mm, that’s my babygirl.” He pets your head affectionately, coherencing a smile from you. Despite everything he’s done, he always knew how to reel you back in. You needed the approval. You needed his approval.

You look up at him with puppydog eyes, to which he cocks his head to the side. “You know what I want.”

Nodding, you slowly unzipper his khaki pants and pull out his cock. You run your hand up and down, pumping it slowly. 

“Don’t be a fucking tease” Light scoffs, raking his fingers through your hair and forcing your mouth down onto him. That sweet, caring demeanor was gone in barley a second- of course it was. What were you expecting? It was a thinly veiled facade and you fell for it everytime without exception. 

Light groans, pushing your head further onto him as you try not to gag. You feel the tip of him hit the back of your throat as he thrusts into your mouth faster. “God, Y/N, you take my cock so well. Hah, if only the media could see you now. Poor little Y/N wants to run away from big bad Kira, meanwhile here she is on her knees for him, sucking him off like the dirty slut she is.”

He lets out a deep sigh before pulling out of your mouth. “Be useful for once and get on the bed.” He commands, bringing you to your feet with his strong grip on your hair and pushing you in the direction of the bed. You obey, sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for his next instruction.

Light slinks over to you, standing over your figure as his delicate fingers dance up your inner thigh. He takes off your skirt and slowly rubs your clit through the fabric of your panties.

“Mmm, Light, more...” You buck your hips up to meet his touch, his movements were agonizingly slow and you needed more friction.

“More?” At once he removes his hand from between your legs and grabs your face, your jaw in between the tight hold of his thumb and forefingers. “You want more, huh? You don’t get to make demands of me. You really think i’m gonna give you what you want after that stunt you pulled? Hah, I’m not letting you off that easy.”

You let out a whine, bucking your hips again asking to be touched.

“Aww, poor baby...” Light cooed, “Open up.” You obeyed, opening your mouth before Light brought your face closer to his, spitting in your mouth. “Now swallow.”

You do, earning a smirk from Light. “Mm, good girl. Good girls get rewarded.”

He pulls your panties aside before dipping two slender fingers inside you; wasting no time, he pumps them in and out frantically.

“Oh god Light, fuck,”

“You’re so wet for me Y/N, you like this, don’t you? I knew you would, such a dirty whore. You like when I treat you like this? You like being treated for the slut you are? God, you probably got wet when I almost killed you. It makes me hard, having you under my thumb like this, under my control...”

“Fuck Light, it feels so good, I’m close...”

Quickly, he removes his fingers from you once again, earning a cry from you at the loss of heat. “Please Light, I need you so bad,” You beg.

“What did I say? You’re still not forgiven for that stunt you pulled. Don’t whine.” He wraps his hand around your throat, pushing you down onto your back.

He fully pulls his boxers down, aligning himself with your entrance.

“Beg for it.”

“Please, please light, god, I need it so badly. I want you.”

“Hmm, yeah? You’re so desperate for my cock? I’m not convinced.”

“Please, Light, I’ll never be bad again, I’ll never mess up again. I need your cock so badly, I need you to use me. Do anything you want.”

“Mm, that’s more like it,” Light remarks before pushing into you, earning a loud moan. HIs thrusts were slow, no doubt teasing you.

“Oh, Light, please, faster...”

“More demands? God, you’re such a needy slut. Fine.” His grip on your throat tightens, pushing you further into the bed as he snaps his hips into you without mercy. His pace is relentless, quickly finding your g-spot.

“Fuck, Light. It... it feels- fuck,”

“Hah, stupid slut, what’s wrong? Cat’s got your tongue? Or is it me fucking you so hard you can’t even think straight, can’t form sentences?”

His words only egg on your approaching orgasam, “Hmmph, it- it feels so good. I’m gonna...”

With that, Light pulls you up slightly by your neck before slamming you roughly back into the bed, thrusting into you with speed. “Cum, show me how sorry you are.”

You obey, releasing with a loud moan of his name. He finishes soon after, roughly letting go of your throat. “Clean yourself up. You look like a fucking mess.”

You slip your panties and skirt back on as Light sits apathetically at his desk, his focus buried in paperwork. You heart skinks to your stomach. 

Once you finish dressing, Light allows you to leave, informing you of the Kira case work he had to finish and opening the door for you. 

“And Y/N,” He catches your attention before you step into the hallway of the hotel, “Let this be a lesson. Don’t ever try to leave me again. You’re mine.” He grabs your jaw and kisses you tenderly- but you weren’t stupid. You knew the motivation behind it, and let you still kissed his soft lips back and let yourself melt into him. 

“Goodbye,” He remarks after pulling away, “Behave yourself.”. The door slams in your face. 

You can still feel his cum dripping from your heat daring to spill out of your panties. The hallway was empty, allowing reality to rush to you at once. Your senses only seem clear when you were alone- with Light, you didn’t see with your own eyes or hear with your own ears.

You let your back touch the door of Light’s hotel room, slowly sliding down until you were sitting on the carpeted floor. Your life was broken pieces and you cut yourself picking up the glass shards, relishing in the fact that your boyfriend liked the way the blood looked on your pricked fingers.

❛  hurt me and tell me you’re mine, i don’t know why but i like it. ❜