#what does the 2020 eclipse mean for me

[cto10121]

Midnight Sun Part 2!!! Possibly my favorite section; I could not put it down, especially the rescue part. I did have Des Notes, though:

“It wasn’t really a difficult ask.” Nope, no way a vampire from 1901 would say this 2020s slang in 2006. Don’t slip up, Meyer!!! Or get better editors!!!

Alice introducing herself to Edward by hugging him and calling him brother and Edward going like “Yep, legit” will never not be great

Edward lying in bed and nearly giving Bella a heart attack with his sluttishness is almost worse in his POV, omg. How the fuck does that happen

Edward reading Tooth and Claw just because Bella recommended it. Remind me again why some people don’t like Edward?

Wait—Edward describes Bella’s scent as “lavender” or “freesia.” One of Bella’s favorite scents is lavender, as well as clean laundry. And she blushed when she looked at Edward, clearly thinking about his scent. Could Edward’s scent actually…be similar to Bella’s? Is that why her scent affects him so powerfully? Holy shit.

Edward “It was enlightening and alluring to watch her in her element” (Bella *eating Cheerios*) 🤝 Romeo “See how she leans her cheek upon her hand” (Juliet: *leaning her cheek on her hand*)

“Bella had gone to the other room to calm her mother. And then the vision had overtaken Alice.” Nice way to cover up that little plot hole, very enterprising

“The image of myself astride the sleek black motorcycle was so appealing that for a second I ignored her” 🤣🤣🤣🤣 🤣🤣🤣🤣 It’s giving Terminator. Love it. Also, what a great parallel to Bella’s motorcycle adventures

Very ambivalent about the highway scene. Otoh, it’s interesting and clever and detailed how the Cullens worked together. Otoh, it’s over the top at places! Like why did they flip the car into upcoming traffic????? Why did they even have to switch cars to begin with????? Meyer really should avoid full-length action scenes (I did like the Victoria fight in Eclipse, though)

Ngl, the James hunt is probably better than in Twilight, if just because Edward is at the front of the action. Still amazing how James slipped away from them

“Bella’s blood was the opposite of pain. It erased every burn I’d ever suffered. And it was so much more than just the absence of pain. It was satisfaction, it was bliss. I felt suffused with a strange kind of joy—a joy of the body alone. I was healed and alive, every nerve ending thrumming with contentment.” The Metaphor(tm) has now become literal.

Book Edward *drinking Bella’s blood*: ✨Bliss ✨🥰 >>>>>> Movie Edward: *gnaws on Bella’s arm like a chicken wing*

“The chuckle that bubbled up from my chest surprised me. I had her blood on her tongue. It was probably tinting the edges of my irises red even now. It was drying into my clothes and dyeing my skin. But she could still make me laugh”

Jasper looks so dangerous to other vampires that James just…accepts his fate. Like welp, guess I’ll die. Iconic

“Why am I towing that ridiculous truck?” Okay, the Cullens hating Bella’s truck is officially a gag.

“For a moment, I imagined Renée as a vampire. Would her thoughts shout audibly at everyone, inescapable?” Nice foreshadowing/Easter egg for Renesmee. So there is a meaning and rationale behind the name other than Bella’s corniness.

That section where Edward watches James’ video and is so overcome with rage and despair and then starts to pray for the strength to leave Bella…that passage was so well-written I was nearly crying

Re: Edward’s decision to leave Bella, It is genius on Meyer’s part (or, well, just practical) to make the obstacles internal instead of external. Edward needs to deal with the consequences of leaving Bella and learn from his mistakes

Finished and in sum: This was great and only gets better in the re-reading. There is a lot of whinging and whining over certain aspects, mostly by anti fans, but those didn’t really bother me. Most lines were taken out of context, as they always do, and spun into something questionable; in context they were fine. Then there are those who say it is better and better-written than Twilight, but I disagree. Twilight was much better structured and less superfluous in detail than Midnight Sun, which could get bogged down in minute-to-minute summary. That said, Midnight Sun does have the advantage that all the dynamic change and development are on Edward’s side than Bella’s, as in a proper Beauty and the Beast telling. But Bella’s story does have power and is arguably more subversive than Edward’s. I think the two complement ultimately each other—the subtext of Twilight is the text of Midnight Sun, and vice versa. Reading both gets you a more complete picture…which the TV show would undoubtedly fuck up in some way if they decide to use parts of Midnight Sun. Le sigh.

[neonscandal]

"JJK really went from a loved manga to a mid-to-bad story with insufferable fans 🙏 may more of us hate it in the future. It snatches the spotlight from genuinely good shows and its another case of "general shonen fan will call any trash 'goat' if the fight is well animated".

I used to be a fan, until the start of the culling game. And after this controversial, inconsistent and inhumane adaptation of shibuya, im glad that I have no interest in both manga and show anymore"

Do you think Culling Game really that hard to understand? Cause I saw quite a llt got turned off to JJK since that arc....

⚠️ Content Warning (no real spoilers) for the Culling Games arc. Nothing in depth to warrant burying beneath a "Keep Reading" but fair to mention just in case.

I don't know how to say this without generalizing negatively but the sentiments very much sound like they came from a cishet dudebro. I've noticed that shonen series' that have a fanbase made up of vocal queer people and/or womxn fans are widely renowned for their "insufferable fans" and this specifically is applied to JJK and MHA across social media. I wonder why.

From the lack of sexualization of female characters/students, the immediate shutdown that Nobara was going to fall for Yuji or Megumi in typical shonen fashion, the cast of men being curated for the female gaze across the manga and anime adaptation (Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Toji, etc.), the overt queer coding and presence of canonically queer/trans characters... also, the simple fact that the canonically attractive and OP characters aren't insufferable assholes? Maybe that's just a me thing but it seems like these factors have been rubbing certain people the wrong way.

Re: the animation of Shibuya and the practices that delivered the work with such an insane timeline and not to the quality of the team of animators' liking... that's valid. But that is a Mappa shortcoming in an effort to snatch up all the prolific and iconic adaptations they can, not a JJK shortcoming. As such, throwing the baby out with the bathwater there doesn't seem like a particularly sound argument but just a means to pile on.

A/N: As it stands, Mappa held the reigns on AOT's final season (taking over from Wit Studio due to production schedule), S2 of Vinland Saga (taking over from Wit Studio due to production schedule), JJK S1, JJK 0 movie, CSM adaptation of S1, Hell's Paradise adaptation of S1, JJK S2, CSM movie adaptation for Reze Arc, Zom 100... all since 2020 and does not encompass other, smaller series'.

I'll concede, it makes sense that the culling games left a lot of readers lost in the forest, myself included. Not the point of the games since we know, to what end, Kenjaku!Geto hopes to achieve at this point.

I think readers were stymied by how much time was spent on developing unique characters who were offed like.. a chapter later. A necessary evil to maintain the living core cast of characters who would later have to take on the Big BadsTM while also moving along the point system for the Culling Games. It seems like Gege Akutami took their time to cultivate these mini-fights though it wasn't clear to what end from a plot standpoint... yet. Empirically, we've seen small details woven back into the story which didn't seem apparent at the time given the exposition style of the mangaka.

As a reader, I love guessing at the end of stories. You can see the crackpot theories that pepper the Manga With Me tag. But the Culling Game arc spans long enough to lose the plot and make it so much harder to forecast where the story is going. Especially when Gege Akutami generally seems like a troll of a person anyway.

I think the Culling Games happening immediately after the Shibuya arc was a choice. Based on anime only fan reactions to Shibuya, what's to come is not for the faint of heart fans. Especially when you consider the losses suffered in Shibuya are immediately eclipsed by the regular losses and disappointments within the Culling Games. However, as a fan, I'mma let Gege cook even if they're using my tears and angst as seasoning because we haven't seen enough of the story to determine the Culling Game's true place/meaning within it.

I think, story wise, they started off too strong with emphasizing Gojo's overpoweredness. Subsequently, they had to write in caveats and build ways to close the gaps between him and other characters to allow for the story to press forward with or without him. I still don't know how this story is going to end though I think I have a new hypothesis from the last time I guessed at who would survive.

At the end of the day, it's definitely that person's opinion to jump back in once more of the story has been fleshed out should they choose to do so because a lot of people don't like dealing in uncertainties. Whatever they decide, don't let it sway your enjoyment one way or another, anon. ❤️

[lampmanliveblogs]

The Lampman's Conspiracy Corner

Lamp Entertainment presents...

The new and improved Conspiracy Corner! It is bigger! It’s better! It has red string!

(note for any newcomers: I'm currently doing a mostly blind watchthrough of The Owl House. The last episode I've seen was Reaching Out. No spoilers please)

Isn’t it beautiful? This legitimately took me hours to set up.

Here’s a closer look at the Timeline. I’m very happy with how it turned out, I especially like the detail of the clock. It’s five to twelve, because the Day of Unity is soon upon us!

So, as I discovered in my last liveblog, the series doesn’t actually take place in 2020, but I had already written all of this. So I just hung up that thing as nod to that.

The thing that this timeline does a really good job of establishing is that Philip really went for hundreds of years seemingly doing nothing. What was he up to during all that time?

Here’s a closer look at the Wittebanes page. It has a simple family tree, as well as some info on the known members. I had the great idea to make some of the spots modular, so if/when new information is revealed, I can remove them and fill it in for real. You’ll also notice that string connected to the paper beneath…

(don’t ask why or where I got the british airways paper from because I’ve no idea)

Here is all the information on the Grimwalker that I’ve gathered. Which isn’t all that much. The only thing about the sad pedestrian that I’ve brought up before that isn’t mentioned here is that there is an emphasis in Philip/Belos’ notes on its eyes. That’s because I can’t draw eyes.

That blue thing is a periodic table. It’s the very one I got in high school chemistry, finally getting put to use. Oh stars, there is an actual interview where I said I might go into chemistry after I graduated… haha! Year 2 of high school Lampman was a very different person.

So, yeah. In Eclipse Lake, I brought up a certain possibility, but dismissed it almost immediately. Then, in Any Sport In A Storm, I brought it up as a joke.

The thing I’m talking about is the possibility that Hunter is the Grimwalker. That would explain how, you know… he exists despite the fact that his father died hundreds of years ago.

If you look on the left, I listed a few possible inspirations or things that were brought to my mind when thinking about what this Grimwalker might be.

First on the list is a Homunculus. It’s real term that was used in alchemy and means ”little person.” Maybe the most famous example in popular fiction though is from Fullmetal Alchemist.  Dana Terrace has referenced Fullmetal Alchemist when talking about The Owl house before (Luz is a fan of Hiromu Arakawa and used to trace her manga; hence why she’s so good at drawing glyphs). So that is a possible inspiration. And I recall reading a post once that compared Belos to Father from FMA. And, well… if Hunter is the Grimwalker, then in some way, that would make Belos…

The second on the list is something I stumbled upon when researching the third item on the list. Bakru. According to one of  my books on mythological/folklore creatures and monster, bakru are unruly children created from wood by witches and wizards. They require powerful magic to control and are often sold to ordinary people.

The third item on my list are a few creatures from Swedish folklore. Because of course I have to reference that. There are a few stories about witches creating helpers like milk hares. They were often created from wood, fabric and other items. Some of them require things like dirt from churchyards, a blood sacrifice (three drops of blood from your left pinkie) and a magic spell. These creatures were used by the witches to steal from their neighbors, usually milk from cows. Hence, milk hare.

And while I have your attention; did you know that the ”mare” in ”nightmare” comes from another creature from swedish folklore? The mara. Maras are at day regular women. Exactly how they become maras is not known. Some say it’s a curse, others say it’s because their mother used dark magic to lessen the pain of childbirth (if the child is born a boy, he becomes a werewolf). At night, maras turn into an oily mist. They can slip through any crack, so you can’t lock them out. They will sit on your chest while you sleep and cause bad dreams and difficulty breathing. To protect yourself, spread flaxseeds around your bed; the mara will have to count them before it can do anything to you.

N-no, please don’t leave! I’ll move on, I swear! No more nordic mythology or folklore!

Here are some miscellaneous things. A note on the portal door, the Titan, The Collector. I put a star on The Collector’s note because he’s associated with stars and moons (and I couldn’t draw a good crescent moon)!

Okay, so I lied before. On the note about the Titan, I bring up a figure from nordic mythology. That being Ymer (or Ymir). It’s a primordial giant from which the world was made. I belive I mentioned that connection in a season one liveblog… I think it was Adventures in the Elements? I could be wrong, and I’m too lazy to go check.

I also drew the glyphs! And the spells Luz has learned so far! They’re not very good, but hey. I tried.

Funny story: I like to doodle the glyphs on random pieces of cardboard occasionally. I ended up showing a coworker a light glyph I drew. She told me it looked like a failed christmas tree. I have not been the same since.

Oh, and I also listed the elemental symbols from the Engelsfors Trilogy. Because I felt like it.

So, this was the new conspiracy corner. I had a ton of fun making it and I hope to bring it back again.

[hereticaloracles]

Lunar Eclipse in Cancer: Day of Destiny

“Do not be dismayed by the brokenness of the world. All things break. And all things can be mended. Not with time, as they say, but with intention. So go. Love intentionally, extravagantly, unconditionally. The broken world waits in darkness for the light that is you.” ―L.R. Knost

Helios’ Astrological Angle on the Lunar Eclipse in Cancer– Here we are, Heretics- on the brink of chaos, an eclipse to rival any other, in a year where fate hangs heavy around our necks like an anchor. What else is new, right? The world still turns, regardless of who is in power, and whether or not we are here to mark its turnings. We lived through the Cardinal Crisis and Mutable Meltdown, and all that came after… all of that feels like so long ago. Things felt more important and desperate then, so much bigger. Now everyone I talk to is just tired. So tired. And that is fair- you’re allowed to be exhausted right now. Eclipses have this way of sucking everything out of you. What you are going through is valid.

And this isn’t just any eclipse, no ma’am- we’re also under the first act of the triple conjunction of Jupiter, Saturn, and Pluto. This part is just Pluto and Saturn, Jupiter will come in later in the year, but that’s the big headline. This is the time we’ve been preparing for. This is it. You already know it, deep in you- this is what you’ve been struggling for, this is the reason. More than that you know that this is your time; Time to step up and own who you are, and show us all what you’ve got.

Are you ready? Cause you’re up, Heretics. Let’s see what you can do!

The Sun and Moon, Mercury, and Saturn– Yes, it feels like the world is ending and everything that you have built is falling down around you. Accept that- but it does no good wailing and moaning about it, wringing your hands in consternation. Your choice with this Astro is to fully stand in your own personal power and accept the burden of changing the world to suit your vision or to own your impotence and accept that you cannot stop the worst of what can come; so you must, therefore, shrink your focus to what is under your purview and within your control. Both come with downsides, and neither can be chosen for you. Whichever story you tell yourself right now will be true, whether it is one where you are weak or powerful.

Not only are the stories we tell ourselves important right now but so are the secrets we keep. Eclipses have a way of revealing truths that you might prefer to stay hidden. These will be your Achilles heel right now. My advice would be to disclose what you can and make it so that what you can’t disclose will never ever come to light by any means. This will be uncomfortable for a lot of you, and is not an easy thing to ask- but this is not easy Astro, and it’s more of a demand by the cosmos than them asking nicely. You were given time to come to this of your own volition, but you didn’t, and now your time is up. The goal here is liberation so that you are not held back by anyone or anything. You think that hiding your secrets makes you safe but all it does is make you a slave to them. This is your chance to disclose them before you are exposed.

Minor Planets used: Ceres, Juno, Eris, Arawn, Deucalion, Borasisi, Rhiphonos, Hebe, Arachne, Sphinx

Venus and Pluto– Okay so here’s the thing: You need to choose. You’ve been torn between two very different paths in your life. You are drawn to both of them and both have merit- but here’s the thing, your heart cannot serve two masters. Your choice must be made from the heart, and the hard part is that you are emotionally invested in both paths- but you must choose. You will need to make your choice never knowing if the choice you made was the right one, and you will have to make it knowing that you are actively choosing not to pursue an entire life. There will be an entire version of yourself you are saying no to. This has its consequences, but it may come as a relief to some. In choosing, you will be free of an entire life, its trappings and consequences. Let your choice release you, and boldly go into your new life, unfettered and unafraid.

Minor Planets used: Pallas Athene, Sedna, Hygiea, Hidalgo, Narcissus

Mars, Jupiter, Chiron, and Uranus– With all of this heavy fatalistic Astro in the air, what can you actually DO about any of it? Quite a lot, actually. This is a time for you to show what you are made of, and you can’t do that by bitching and moaning, talking about how much better things would be if they were different. Things are NOT different, they are what they are. Start there and go forward, taking action that gets you from where you are now to where you want to be. Define your goals, and take action to get there. This is major Astro that can help you overcome just about any obstacle in your path, but it has to start with you. Heaven helps those who help themselves, after all- and the more you do on that front, the more that you will find this Astro a ready and willing ally. You are not alone, but you have to walk your path. The only one who can live your life is you. Nothing is set in stone or decided yet, you are still able to change the narrative- but your window to do so is closing. Act now.

Minor Planets used: Varuna, Quaoar, Rhadamanthus, Pholus, Nessus, Aphidas, Klotho, Ophelia, Niobe, Tantalus, Astraea, Magdalena, Siva, Sisyphus, Orpheus, Asclepius

Neptune– The malaise is thick and heavy, and it’s coming from him, y’all. Neptune is the backdrop of the eclipse and he is dragging it all DOWN, yet simultaneously making it bearable. That is the tradeoff with him. So on top of EVERYTHING ELSE, you are going to feel super sluggish and lackadaisical. That, and you’re going to be confronted with serious questions of worth and fulfillment- mostly of if what you’re doing right now is providing you with a sense of fulfillment and self-worth. Are you living your path right now? Are you aligned to your truth? Are you willing to let go of what isn’t aligned, even if it hurts you or others to do so? How far are you willing to go to find your path if you’ve lost your way?

More importantly, in getting lost, have you been able to find others that were similarly off their path? Have you been able to help them find their way as well? The true point of this astro is to bring us home to ourselves, in our truest selves. No one gets left behind- least of all you, Heretics.

Minor Planets used: Mors-Somnus, Dziewanna, Iris, Burney

Lunar Eclipse in Cancer: Day of Destiny was originally published on Heretical Oracles

[sitp-recs]

D'you happen to have anythig for draco being a real dick? then he falls in love with harry. but is still a dick just a loving one?

Hello anon! I guess that would depend on our definition of “real dick” here lol I do like Draco being snarky and morally grey to some extent, nothing too extreme. This was a tricky list - I’ve only included fics where he’s purposefully being mean/unpleasant, as opposed to lashing out as a self-defense mechanism or just displaying normal levels of snark which is a common trait of fanon Draco. These fics came to mind, let me know if they work:

push and pull you down by @bonesliketambourines (2020, E, 5k)

Harry's resigned himself to petty, inconsequential cases and no real connection to his job at the Auror department—after all, what else would he be doing with his time?

A Fox's Bargain by raitala (2014, E, 6k)

Harry made a bargain with Draco. He knew it was going to come back and bite him on the arse, he just didn’t think about what exactly Draco would ask for.

Let Me Have You and I'll Let You Save Me by Frayach (2012, M, 6k)

Draco keeps coming back, and Harry keeps letting him. Draco can’t stay away, and Harry can’t live without him.

Timeshare by astolat (2016, M, 14k)

“It’s not for long,” Hermione said. “By the time we get back to Hogwarts, the Unfettering Brew will be ready.”

“Listen to you!” Ron said. “He’s got to get through a month with the Dursleys and a month at Malfoy Manor. With Draco Malfoy.”

Dirty Little Secret by @writcraft (2013, E, 22k)

When someone threatens Harry’s life, Kingsley decides to send him to a safe house with only Draco Malfoy for company. As the two men are forced together, memories of the past resurface and secrets are discovered.

The Good Guys by Frayach (2014, E, 26k)

The Second Voldemort War is limping into its fourth year, and the Forces of Shining Light are slowly turning into the Forces of Expedient Grey.

Stain of Silence by brummell (2013, E, 28k)

After the war, Draco serves out his sentence in Harry Potter's house.

Fearful Trill by @vukovich (2021, E, 29k)

Harry should have come out and met someone when he was younger. He should have seen a doctor about the pain in his hip while youth was still on his side. Now, he's made his peace with dying young, but maybe not with dying alone.

Make Me a Headline (I Want to Be That Bold) by @dictacontrion (2015, E, 31k)

Draco never expected to see Harry doing that again. Especially with someone else, in a grainy photograph that's landed on his desk one Monday morning.

Bite Me, Hate Memes by pir8fancier (2007, E, 44k)

Draco Malfoy is incensed to realize that someone is trying to usurp his position as the premier Harry Potter hater.

Reparo by amalin (2008, E, 85k)

Voldemort's final defeat does not mean Harry Potter's troubles are over; far from it. In the aftermath of war, he returns to a Hogwarts that is fractured and divided, but this is no break that can be fixed with a spell.

Eclipse by Mijan (2003, T, 287k)

Draco swore his revenge on Harry for Lucius's imprisonment, and Harry all but laughed at him. But Draco is planning more than schoolyard pranks this time.

[whatiwillsay]

kaylor oomfs avert your eyes 😞

i get asked from time to time “why don’t you like kaylor, why don’t you like karlie, why do you think kaylor isn’t together? why aren’t you and ttb married yet?” and i think it’s high time i centralize my thoughts and receipts on all of that in a little timeline of shady things karlie has done to taylor that have made me wary of kaylor/karlie/that whole situation.  don’t read if you stan kaylor this isn’t for you (unless you know you’re interested in the truth.)

first things first, i do think something romantic happened between kaylor go read @swiftiesleuth‘s realistic kay timeline for what i (generally) think happened between them.

but long story short - i think joshlie is real, i think they weren’t all that serious at the beginning, she famously didn’t meet his family for years, he didn’t take her to work events for a long time, so there’s room for her to have a fling with taylor even though we ended up with a real joshlie endgame.

taylor’s music and art supports this theory - in the wd mv she paints herself as the other woman, on rep she sings of secret sexy sex with her best friend that drives her crazy, in cruel summer she sings of a miserable, secret, and toxic situation with a person who rejects her love, in illicit affairs and august again she is the other woman - the art matches up.  she also sings about her sunshine being gone on lover, and eclipsed on folklore. we have good clues in taylor’s artistic expression.

taylor’s given interviews about some of these karlie songs - she said cruel summer was about the start to a “doomed” relationship and look at what she said about august:

“It kind of explores the idea of the undefined relationship. As humans, we're all encouraged to just be cool and just let it happen, and don't ask what the relationship is — Are we exclusive? But if you are chill about it, especially when you're young, you learn the very hard lesson that if you don't define something, oftentimes they can gaslight you into thinking it was nothing at all, and that it never happened. And how do you mourn the loss of something once it ends, if you're being made to believe that it never happened at all?”

if joshlie is real which i think they are that 100% sounds like taylor having to process being gaslit by karlie while she cheats on josh with her.

so why do i think joshlie is real?

-  josh has no credible gay rumors that didn’t originate on gaylor tumblr: he has old ex gfs that came before karlie, harvard message boards gossiped about him and didn’t like him but never said that he was gay, in fact one of the complaints josh’s schoolmates had about him was that he got special treatment for her girlfriend at parties.

-  as stated before taylor’s art suggests she’s been the other woman with someone in her life recently.  if josh and karlie are beards then what is the affair? why is taylor the other woman so often all of a sudden?

-  i’ve spoken to someone with a mutual friend with the kushners - grain of salt of course, i know you can only trust stuff you hear from me with no proof so much, but i do absolutely trust this person and they say - no way in hell is joshlie fake, no way in hell is josh gay, no way in hell is karlie having taylor’s baby.  also karlie absolutely has moved down to miami with josh.  i’m sure we’ll see her in nyc and la from time to time but she is living in miami now.

-  vicky ward, who is a real investigative journalist not some unhinged person on tumblr, wrote a tell all about the kushners.  she uncovered gay rumors about josh’s father and josh’s brother but not josh.  she had actual sources and was legitimately digging up tons of dirt on these people and not a word about josh being gay or joshlie being fake.

-  yes karlie did convert to judaism.  it’s really offensive to suggest she didn’t.  of course she always could have done it for personal reasons but occam’s razor dictates she did it for josh i don’t know what else to tell you 🤷‍♀️

-  also just vibes.  karlie writes him love notes and leaves them with his breakfast.  they make playlists for one another.  if the kushners weren’t so heinous they’d be cute.

so in the joshlie is real world view i inhabit, i don’t stan kaylor the same way i do swiftgron because i don’t think kaylor was ever a committed monogamous relationship.  important and impactful on taylor’s life? absolutely.  inspired some amazing music? 100%. but was is true and tragic love that drives me insane and makes me feral?  no.  i don’t believe so.  is it still an interesting and iconic ship? yes!  but i don’t stan because it wasn’t like...true love or gay shit like that.

so let’s talk about karlie’s screwups that 1. assure me kaylor is not together and 2. make me have no desire to stan karlie/kaylor.

1.  after the kimye drama (something that deeply traumatized taylor we now know thanks to miss americana) karlie said she was sure kim was a lovely person 😭 now i know she walked it back and tweeted she and taylor had one another’s backs. i know karlie was just trying to be diplomatic.  but come on...if someone did what kim did to taylor to my lover or hell even just my friend i would say “fuck that clout chasing fame whore” bottom line.  c’mon guys.  have higher standards for your otp.

karlie also has vibed with kim on IG about her adidasas line.  recently!  yes i know she’s just promoting her brand but c’mon.  taylor still hates kim, their drama got rehashed in march 2020 and just 6 months later kim n karlie are bestie-ing around on ig.

2.  ALL the fucking masters drama and scooter fucking braun

-  not long at all after the masters heist karlie was palling around with scooter on a yacht like come on the only other thing taylor is equally as traumatized over as the kimye drama is the master’s heist.  why is karlie hanging out with him and partying with him at this time?

-  karlie liked a tweet completely incinerating taylor (in a gross and unfair/inaccurate way) regarding the masters heist.  she unliked it but still.  why was she even looking at that shit.

-  and yeah we gotta talk about perez.  so perez hilton (who is a scumbag and gross but sometimes does have legitimate tea) posted a video saying that karlie and taylor were no longer friends because karlie betrayed taylor to scooter.  now if that were all there was to it, it’d be dumb gossip.  but a taylor fan account posted the video to twitter ashley avignone and claire winter both liked the tweet.  ashley liked two tweets about it.  perez proceeded to tweet that since two of taylor’s oldest and truest friends liked the tweets it must mean he was correct and neither of the girls unliked the tweets.  ashley and claire are low key people, not celebs, not pawns in a “fued narrative”, just long time and loyal friends of taylor’s.  they liked the tweet, imo, because there’s some truth to it.

-  that brings me to spencer pratt.  spencer is a reality star and super swiftie/huge fan of taylor’s.  he despises karlie.  he’s tweeted negatively about her and he also had perez onto his podcast to talk about the drama between karlie and taylor.  taylor herself sent him a cardigan.  do you really think taylor is going to allow a cardigan to go out to the guy who’s dragging her girlfriend or bestie? i don’t think so.  receipts on perez and spencer here.

3.  karlie posted for hailey fucking beiber’s bday instead of taylor’s and hailey hates taylor 🤢🤢🤢

4.  karlie married into a fascist family that is associated with the trumps.  like how can you expect me to stan?  trump is a fucking criminal evil piece of shit.  i know karlie isn’t like him (probably) but it’s still awful.  kimby even goes around liking ivanka’s ig posts like give me a fucking break 😭.

in summation, you can disagree w me all you like, you can ship kaylor all you like, but if you’re of sound mind i don’t think you can look at the facts in this post and think i’m misguided for not being a kaylor/karlie stan.  and you can’t blame me for thinking if you spend a lot of time obsessing over that ship you may not really be that big a fan of taylor’s.  and if you’re spending a lot of time leading lgbt kids on to think they’re going to get a kaylor end game when all the objective facts of the case suggest that that’s never going to happen you might need to reevaluate but at the very least you certainly can’t press me for not doing all that.

[phanficawards]

2020 PHANFIC AWARDS: FINAL RESULTS - ORIGINAL AWARDS

While we’ve tried our best to keep the awards fair, we unfortunately cannot help if some biases did come though during voting.

We also want to say that no matter the results, every fic that was nominated is a winner in our minds! Everyone’s fics, whether they’re nominated or not, are beautiful and unique and could have only come from you!

-

Favorite Phandom Blogger Of 2020

First Place: @deadandphilgames

Second Place: @intoapuddle

TIE - Third Place: @ttlmt

TIE - Third Place: @sierraadeux

Favorite Dan Moment Of 2020

First Place: insta wine selfie

Second Place: the attitude magazine photoshoot

Third Place: the book

Favorite Phil Video Of 2020

First Place: Trying To Catch And Rescue A Wild Pigeon

Second Place: Coming Out To You: 1 Year Later

Third Place: Tour Of My Plants (living and dead)

Favorite Phan Moment Of 2020

TIE - First Place: Phil’s Quiz Show

TIE - First Place: h u s b a n d s

Second Place: dan helping phil behind the scenes

Favorite Dan Tweet Of 2020

First Place: shove an ice cube all the way up my ass

Second Place: among us? if pretending to do tasks while everyone else does the work and hiding in vents to avoid social interaction makes me an ‘imposter’ then pass me the knife i’m sus

Third Place: PHEW LMAO

Favorite Phil Tweet Of 2020

First Place: so my phone presented me with a “Dinners in London over the years” memory ..and it is literally the most cursed video I’ve ever seen

Second Place: “why are you like this” #amazingphildothewap

Third Place: Just said a sofa was ‘so comfy it makes my ass clap’ and apparently I don’t understand what that phrase means

Favorite Dan Insta Story Of 2020

First Place: sexy nuggets

Second Place: ominous la story

Third Place: book support

Favorite Phil Insta Story Of 2020

First Place: not sure if dan has enough dips

Second Place: the autumn merch photoshoot with him and dan

Third Place: too much fizz

Best Fantasy Fic

TIE - First Place: Houndstooth (ao3 - indistinct_echo)

TIE - First Place: a strange mirror (ao3 - glowingatmosphere)

Second Place: impractical magic (ao3 - sierraadeux)

Third Place: butterfly (ao3 - A_Million_Regrets)

Best Platonic Fic

First Place: total eclipse of the heart (ao3 - sierraadeux)

Second Place: blue can be kind, too (ao3 - tarredion)

Best LGBTQ+ Fic

First Place: important dates in history (ao3  - judearaya)

Second Place: too far to walk alone (ao3 - chickenfree)

Third Place: strictly come dancing but make it GAY (ao3 - natigail)

[ms-m-astrologer]

The Week Ahead: May 31 - June 6, 2021

Void of Course Moon

Tuesday, June 1, 06:14 UT (Aquarius) - 09:07 UT (Pisces)

Thursday, June 3, 11:10 UT (Pisces) - 17:59 UT (Aries)

Saturday, June 5, 22:47 UT (Aries) - Sunday, June 6, 05:46 UT (Taurus)

Lunar Phases

Wednesday, June 2, 07:24 UT - Last Quarter Moon, 11:59 Pisces

The keynote of the Last Quarter lunar phase is to "turn away from" what we had been doing, and to "tear down old structures" that don't work for us any more. We may be particularly hard on ourselves with this particular Last Quarter, almost to extreme levels. Maybe what we need to give up, is nitpicking and second-guessing ourselves? If we feel like we need to lead simpler lives, then by all means throw out the dross. Just don't throw the baby out with the bath water!

Sunday, June 6, 07:25 UT - Balsamic Moon, 0:49 Taurus

The keynote of the Balsamic lunar phase is to "let go of the past and envision the future." Unfortunately, some of the self-recrimination will carry over from the previous phase - with the unpleasant addition of other people contributing their negative two cents' worth. Keeping life simple is the key. Look for a simpler, saner future. What does that look like?

Retrograde/Direct/Etc.

Pre-retrograde shadow: Pallas Athene/Pisces, Jupiter/Pisces

Retrograde: Mercury/Gemini, Juno/Sagittarius, Saturn/Aquarius, Pluto/Capricorn

Post-retrograde shadow: Vesta/Virgo

Ingress

Wednesday, June 2, 13:19 UT - transiting Venus enters Cancer

This is kind of funny, with my sense of humor, because now that it's summer in the Northern Hemisphere, and the vaccinated among us are free to go out and enjoy ourselves ... all of a sudden we all want to stay home! Venus in Cancer values the home, the tribe, the family (biological or found) - and for the 25 days she's here, she'll have plenty of opportunities to wallow in those more domestic pursuits. Starting a flower garden, baking cookies, fussing over our loved ones - just be careful not to eat too many of the cookies!

Et Cetera

There are two Opportunity Periods this week:

Monday, May 31, 05:25 UT - Tuesday, June 1, 06:14 UT. "As we're between eclipses and Mercury is retrograde, use it to attend to matters started before May 22." (Ms M thinks it's a great OP to get in touch with people you haven't seen in a while.)

Thursday, June 3, 06:24 UT - 17:59 UT. "Great OP to let go of toxic emotions and create harmony within, helped by the trine between Venus and Jupiter. As we're between eclipses and Mercury is retrograde, use it to attend to matters started before May 22."

There is a difficult aspect coming up on Saturday: an opposition between Mars/Cancer and Pluto Rx/Capricorn. It will be exacerbated by an Aries Moon - in effect giving us a cardinal t-square for the day. Some problem which we haven't yet dealt with, which we've allowed to fester, will potentially blow up. Probably via relationships (it's an opposition), and possibly involving us having to make a choice (also an opposition). We'll have to fight very hard to keep in mind the Libra precepts of tact and diplomacy to balance out the t-square.

This also marks the halfway point in the Mars-Pluto cycle. Their previous conjunction was on March 22/23, 2020, with Pallas Athene and Jupiter very close by; on March 24, India and the UK went into lockdown, and the Summer 2020 Olympics were postponed. (Or at least Wikipedia says that's what happened.) Something that happened to you at about that time, some seed that you planted, will come to fruition.

Mars and Pluto's next conjunction, I've learned, happens on March 3, 2022 - with transiting Venus right there also, as well as asteroids Vesta and Siwa, and the Centaur Amycus. This is slightly alarming to me, because that is about nine days after the first US Pluto return.

[yourwitchmama]

Full Moon Lunar Eclipse in Sagittarius, June 5th 2020

I usually like to reference one of my favorite websites for these posts, so this one came from foreverconscious.com which I linked as the source.  The Sagittarius Full Moon Lunar Eclipse on June 5, will be guiding us to stand our ground, claim our power, and allow the voice of our inner fire to speak. It is the first in a trio of Eclipses, and as we walk this Eclipse Gateway over the coming weeks, we will discover a new path emerging, one that is very different from the path we were walking before. Lunar Eclipses are like heightened Full Moons that bring shift, change, and breakthroughs. What’s interesting is that this Lunar Eclipse falls at 14 degrees of Sagittarius, which just happens to be the location of the Great Attractor. The Great attractor is a little bit of a mystery, but our entire galaxy is being pulled in this direction. As the name suggests, the Great Attractor signals a powerful point of attraction in the Universe that can supercharge the energy of this Eclipse. Not only does this Lunar Eclipse fall on this highly charged point, but for those on Pacific Standard Time, this Eclipse also falls at the magical 12:12pm. This is also the first Sagittarius Eclipse we have had since 2010-2013, which also indicates the start of a new Eclipse cycle. For clues on what this new Eclipse cycle may stir in your life, think back to 2010-2013 and see what significant, life-changing events happened during this period. It’s not that you will be repeating these events, but you may very well find yourself leveling up or transcending what you learned at this time and replacing it with some newer and more advanced wisdom. But now, let’s take a deep dive into this June Sagittarius Lunar Eclipse to see what it may bring… A Lunar Eclipse has ten times the potential of Full Moon, and often clears a path that helps accelerate our soul journey. We may receive some news that something in our life is coming to an end. Or, we may find that we are called to release and let go of something that we truly thought was serving us. We may have thought we were going one way, but often an Eclipse comes along to reveal a whole new path. As this Eclipse falls in Sagittarius, we are likely going to find ourselves clearing thoughts, beliefs, and ideas in order to prepare for this new journey that is yet to unfold. Under this Sagittarius Lunar Eclipse, the planet Mars will also be very active. Mars is the warrior, which is why this Eclipse very much plays into this idea of finding our inner warrior and inner flame, and allowing it to shine. Emotions may be heated, but we have to learn to listen to ourselves. We have to learn to listen to our anger and frustration for there is wisdom to gain. If we allow ourselves to sit in our emotions, we are likely to have a breakthrough. If we allow ourselves to feel our anger or feel the intensity of our emotions, we are likely to find the truth of what is bubbling underneath the surface. All the voices you carry within you deserve to be heard. Sometimes we work so hard to silence the voice of shame or guilt or anger, but there is also a power in learning to stop and listen to what it’s saying.If we constantly dismiss the harder or more abrasive thoughts and feelings when they arise, we never really get to understand them. it’s not that we want to sit in our anger forever or allow our inner voice to become drowned by negative talk, but we also don’t want to ignore these voices and push them away. We want to listen to them and discover what they really mean. We want to hug each and every one of them, and see the value in what they have to share and offer. When we listen to ourselves; when we really take the time to go within and listen, we catch things we may have otherwise missed. We learn things about ourselves, and we open to a new truth. It is not just our love and light that can teach us, but our pain, anger, jealousy, and resentment too. These emotions are uncomfortable, and no one wants to feel this way, but it is so much a part of our human experience, and we can no longer ignore them or wish them away with false thinking. We have to listen, find the jewels of wisdom that they offer, and then let them go. We cannot rush this process. We cannot just let it go because it’s uncomfortable. We have to sit with it first. We have to own all of it. Claim all of it. And allow ourselves to rise with it so we can understand what is fanning our flames.What ignites you? What gets you mad and angry? What fires you up is a clue to your power and your purpose. For me, my anger often stems from disregarding my feelings in favor of what others think, or disregarding my feelings in order to play nice. This is very often at the root of my anger.This realization only came once I sat with my anger. This realization now lets me know where I need to focus my attention and not give my power away. This June Eclipse may also be stirring things in our relationships as Retrograde Venus is very active too. If you have been having doubts about a relationship or feeling uncertain, this Eclipse may start answering your questions.There is an illuminating factor to this Eclipse, so if you do have questions, if you have been feeling confused, set an intention and allow this Eclipse to show you the way. Allow it to illuminate and bring you to the path that is best for your soul. This Sagittarius Eclipse will work in harmony with the next two Eclipses, so there is more to the journey that will unfold. By the time we have finished walking through this gateway of Eclipses, we are going to feel reborn. We may enter this gateway feeling confused, overwhelmed, and unsure, but we will leave it with a clearer knowing, a stronger sense of our destiny, and more connected to our personal power. 

[nym-ic]

THERE ARE GOING TO BE AN UNGODLY AMOUNT OF SCREENSHOTS. IF YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT THE DREAM SPEEDRUN DRAMA, YOU’RE BETTER OFF SCROLLING PAST, BECAUSE IT’S A LOT OF INFORMATION THAT REQUIRES THE GENERAL CONTEXT OF THE SITUATION

hi!! so i’ve taken some screenshots of the speedrunning discord in the interest of showing the toxicity i have seen in chat. i will also be including the screenshots of mods who were actually trying to stop the conversation because it was getting way out of hand.

dream’s messages in screenshots will also be mentioned after the toxicity and mods in the beginning.

this is an analysis of the toxicity and mod response as well as an analysis on the conversation that took place with dream.

also, small note: i will be using gender neutral pronouns for everyone mentioned in this discussion aside from dream, as we are aware of what he prefers :)

i am going to state this now that every single one of these screenshots was taken on december fourteenth, 2020 somewhere between 9:30 am and 11 am in the PST timezone:

this is just blatant hatred and toxicity. i don’t have to explain it because it’s very visible.

Mango is both a verifier and mod, and is seen actively trying to end the conversation and toxicity about dream, as it was completely flooding the general chat of the discord. i’m fairly sure the night before, general was locked about 2-3 times due to the spam and toxicity.

CasseBot as you will see later on in the screenshots, is also both a verifier and mod, and the screenshot above me is definitely a statement done in poor taste and uncalled for. however, in the screenshot below, you can see them reprimanding and handing out warnings to end the conversation about dream as well as the toxicity. the statement above was unnecessary, but they were actively trying to end conversation.

now, i will be sharing screenshots of the messages dream sent to the #coding-math channel in the discord, i am apologizing in advance for the pure amount of screenshots, but i was trying to capture the entire conversation, and i left out as many side conversations unrelated to what they were talking about as i could.

i am not blurring names here as it would be very difficult to follow the conversation, and the names are relevant to who is saying what to understand when certain people are talking at once. it should also be noted that these people were very calm in their discussion to dream, and there was no yelling or blatant calling him a cheater, which is a win in my book because it points toward an actually intelligent conversation

every single one of these screenshots was taken on december fourteenth, 2020 somewhere between 9:30 am and 11 am in the PST timezone:

the conversation in the beginning starts out incredibly calm, civil, and dare i say it, wholesome, as everyone taking part in the conversation at this point was genuinely helping dream find the files he needed from his world files in the version folder

the screenshot above is a closeup of the image seen in the screenshot before it!!

i’m not sure exactly what the eclipse directory is, but if someone is willing to explain it, feel free :)

aadil is an average community member of the server (not a mod or verifier!!), and can be seen supposedly very confrontational and flippant of certain evidence, though this is due to the wording of their messages, as they quickly corrected themselves below

Kohru here mentions being able to hide different ways to do the same thing dream is being accused of, however does not send anything due to the fact that they likely don’t actually know. i state this because they use an argument a few screenshots ahead saying they could “get [their] mom to do it” which is an argument that isn’t actually professional to what they’re discussing, however this could be due to the time that these messages took place.

this is where you can see dream start to get a little frustrated through his sarcasm and wording of the statement, but he is still remaining otherwise civil in the conversation, and those having the conversation (aside from a few choice reactions to things he sent as messages including flipping off emojis and a clown emoji) with dream were also being reasonable debaters and relatively non-toxic.

ImZaJojoReference (an average community member, not a mod or verifier!!) states “evidence” claiming anything dream will put forward will be fake, but then does not produce anything else to the conversation of note that could explain why they believe this.

we’ve seen dream admit this many times that he does not have the knowledge in math nor statistics to be able to accurately debate this data, which is the reason for his hiring of staticians to help him in his own investigation and defense of himself. he states he has several, so again, i’m excited for the outcome because maybe the situation would finally get resolved!

throughout this entire conversation, i noticed that Kohru, an average community member (not a mod or verifier!!) was very confrontational in their statements to dream, though i will attribute this behavior to the timestamps of the messages, as it’s so early in the morning (in my timezone at least. this could be fundamentally flawed).

these are all the screenshots i took from the Minecraft Java Edition Speedrun discord, and i hope i grabbed enough screenshots to remain primarily unbiased to both sides of the argument, but i can conclude that most of my perceived bias will be dragged from how i brought up toxicity, and how i was glad it was being taken care of.

if you made it all the way through, thanks for listening to my rambles in between, and i hope this provides information for people who aren’t in the discord, or are generally confused on the dynamic dream holds with the speedrun community. the #general chat is mainly just completely toxic, and there are a few of dream’s defenders in there, but they get almost immediately shot down because of their like of him. this means that many of the people against dream aren’t truly listening to other sides of the argument (not including the many screenshots i provided of the more level-headed members of the discord). dream’s rebuttal will likely bring forward new information, and though a lot of it will be ignored by this community because of their almost pure hatred for the guy, it will be everyone’s decision to make up their own opinions on the subject.

taking information from many different sources and making sure you take in both sides of the story is very important to making an informed decision on the matter at hand. i hope these screenshots of the conversation made information a little more digestible due to its casual and lax nature

I AM NOT ADVOCATING FOR THE SENDING OF HATE TO THESE CHOSEN PEOPLE. I HAVE BLOCKED OUT THE NAMES OF THOSE ACTING TOXIC BECAUSE I KNOW HOW THE COMMUNITY IS. TOXICITY IS NOT A WAY TO DECIDE IF A PERSON IS BAD BECAUSE IN ALL LIKELIHOOD, THOSE PEOPLE WERE UNDER 18 AND THUS CHILDREN. EVEN IF THEY WERE ADULTS, SENDING HATE AND DEATH THREATS MAKES YOU JUST AS BAD AS THEM.

if you send hate to the mods or the people having genuine discussion with dream, i don’t know what else to tell you other than you’re an idiot. because those people were pretty much the nicest people on the server.

thanks for reading, hope you have a good day!!!

[gornwen]

My partner is poly and I'm not. I'm terrified of losing them; they mean everything to me. They reassure me whenever I bring it up that I'm the primary wife, but that they'd like to date. I wasn't brought up around polyamory and I have self worth issues that make it hard for me to remember that they'll love me no matter what. I desperately want to make them happy and let them be who they are, but I'm still scared. I don't doubt I'd be fine with it eventually, but we live apart and it's hard rn.

Hi love, hope you're doing well enough (on the 2020-adjusted scale, of course).

Sorry about taking so long to answer this; I first saw it right after my museum (my place of work) closed because of Covid and I wasn't in a good place to do anything but knit. I have since been too embarrassed about not answering your ask that I've been avoiding it. Which definitely isn't cool to you at all. So here I am getting over my embarrassment, but I fear my answer might not be all peachy and joy, but hopefully hope-filled.

First of all, couples coming to polyamory from monogamy struggle. It is inherently an unstable moment because you are changing the nature of the covenant at the heart of your relationship. You promised to be each other's only romantic and sexual love, to put each other in a place of primacy. If you are married, there are vows of fidelity that you took that you understood reasonably to have a very specific meaning and that meaning is changing. It's okay to be scared. Just don't let your fear rule your emotions or your actions. (I should take my own advice here 😅)

What isn't changing: your devotion to each other, your love, your working partnership, your inside jokes, your responsibility to each other, the joy you find in each other's company. That all matters in polyamory, too.

Fidelity is there, too, it just looks different at first. I expect my partners to be present in the time we are together. I trust them to tell me if and when they are seeing someone new. I trust I will be able to meet this new person and that this new person and I will approach how we relate to each other from a place of love, because we both love the same person. Our relationship is rooted in love. I trust my partners to make sure that our love is not eclipsed as they start seeing someone new.

Here's the big secret, monogamy and polyamory aren't that different. Just like in monogamy, you trust your partner not to hurt you. You trust your partner to be honest about their actions and intentions. You hope your partner has a life that is full of its own joy and that you amplify that joy. You know that you will soothe each other's tears, bandage wounds, and kiss away worries.

Just like in monogamy, you both keep your own friendships and platonic relationships. If you have a best friend or close sibling, the love you have for them does not diminish the love you have for your partner, and ideally helps highlight it. Adding in additional romantic or sexual partners does not deminish the love your partner has for you. Done rightly, more love multiplies into more love. That is something everyone can enjoy.

Jealousy is just as much a part of polyamory as it is monogamy. In monogamy jealousy can be mistaken for love. Love is not ownership. Love is not jealous. Love is giving. Jealousy is an emotion about the self, a warning about insecurities or needs unmet. You will learn to recognize what your jealously is telling you and be able to use it as a tool to grow.

Of course, the longer you go down the polyamory road, there will be ideas that shake you. Contemporary culture centers itself on coupling. Polyamory does not. The longer a polycule practices polyamory the more likely they are to be non-heirarchical. You may in the future shift from being their primary wife to being their first and longest love. Usually when that happens it is an organic evolution as the relationships in your polycule shift. It should feel natural when it happens, but it may feel natural in the way that growth pains feel natural.

In polyamory there tends to be a confusion of the self and your role in your relationships, selfishness, looking out for your own needs, and mindfully choosing how you apply your self and your love. Be mindful. Learn to know that you are worthy of love because you are your own wonderful human. Avoid selfishness, it never wears well and will in the end harm you.

On a more practical level I find kitchen table polyamory, where everyone in your polycule hangs out together in the most everyday settings, to be incredibly helpful for removing fear. People stop being new and you don't have to fear the unknown when they aren't an unknown. You aren't always going to get along, but that isn't a reason not to try.

Remember, especially when meeting new metas (your partner's partners) that since you were the first, the primary, you may be seen as intimidating just because of that (think meeting your mother-in-law or the first time you met their childhood best friend). Be kind to yourself and them. You are obligied to be gracious and soothe your insecurities. Your partner bringing their date home for you to meet is one of the biggest acts of love and trust they can show.

💕

Edited 8/18/2020 because pronouns are hard.

[rowanartist]

Fan fiction rec 2020s

Most Important Meal Of The Day by silentkinght I'd love some fan art. marvel; Explicit; Stucky

Training Exercises by BlitheFool comic my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Love you for you by SaltywithSarcasm genderbend thanks to quirk whammie my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Cry a Little Harder for Me Sunshine by Bronzeflower helping his lover feel/express his emotions my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Allowed to be Loud by ravyn_sinclair mutual masturbation then get together implied.my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Bliss by notveryheroic "Aizawa finally understood why Hizashi had been so hung up on the idea of romance. The sex was phenomenal, but this was what bliss felt like." my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Eraserwatch by LuceCannon21 Aizawa cares.my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

A Perfect Opportunity by rhoen I was in a mood.my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Pieces by Aryagraceling deep thought, insecurity, feelings. Investigate the series. my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

teamwork makes the dream work by ObscureReference two part short series. Relatable. my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Storytime Always Happens by Accident in High School by NothingEnough a transitioned adult tells part of their story to get there.my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

common room by fehinprogress fan art for 5 + 1 by CallingForHeavenon ao3my hero academia; Fic is Explicit; Bakugou/Kirishima

Abide By by modernmint originally I wasn't sure what to think about this but two phrases are stuck in my head: "W’na b’ttm,” and “I want you to.. I want — praise.”my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Circadian Rhythm by deafmic Aizawa needs support and struggles to allow others to give it.my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

How Aizawa Accidentally Became a Dad by writers_writers awww! EraserMic become dads! my hero Academia; General; EraserMic

Dear Listener by geniusbillionairegayboy makes me think of my boyfriend's sibling who I feel is represented in some ways by a few of the charactersmy hero Academia AU; Explicit; EraserMic

Tender by SenkoWakimarin chronic pain, what does attraction mean? Does it matter if there is love? my hero Academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

In Your Arms Tonight by donniedont Aizawa feels the pains of hero work my hero Academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Gonna get Mine/Jump the Gun by cursedwurm i think this is the second band AU that hit mel, the first was Stucky my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

go without, 'til the need seeps in by thinkpink ... possibly aromatic aizawa?my hero Academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

The Wise Man by MsThunderFrost people ask if Izuku is All Might's love childmy hero Academia; now registered users only

To Come Together by dansrusse awww, despite it being heterosexual smutmy hero Academia; Explicit; All Might/Momma Midoriya

Practice, Practice, Practice by B4dandBruj0 mom midoriya practicing her quirk ;) at first i wasn't going to include but then it lingered in my mind my hero Academia; Explicit; All Might/Momma Midoriya

Being riled up isn't fun when you're tied up by DerpDerpDeku one of the reasons that communication makes life bettermy hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Sweet Dreams by Miko odd but interesting thoughts on the widow programmarvel; General; Natasha

Chocolate Cake by daddyissueswho short and sweetmy hero academia; teen; dad mic

Of the flu and issues in the past. By Saratoga3 single dad azawa my hero acadamia; teen; Dadzawa & Shinsou

a mix of six by Argentina dadzawa, characters working through stuff and growing. my hero Academia; series

the roast of class 1-A by catastrophicGallivant funny "chat fic" my hero Academia; Teen; Aizawa-Yamada family

Coming out 5+ 1 times by Just_an_evil_immortal as a cis straight demisexual, this seemed cute - though others could disagreemy hero Academia; Teen; Dadzawa

Silently Loved by eraserheadsmashr sweet and caring! my hero Academia; Teen; EraserMic

When You Have Nightmares and a Gay Crisis but Your Teacher is Gay and Relatable So It's Okay by PastaMic emotions and caring my hero Academia; teen

Good Excuses by lod lovably dense Aizawa, not that I have a right to judge...my hero Academia;Teen; EraserMic & Eri

Mockingbird by angst_goblin adorable deaged Izuku with emotions. my hero Academia; Teen; Dadzawa

More Than Just a Smile by ravyn_sinclairr showing a deeper side to Present Mic my hero Academia; Teen; EraserMic

Goodnight Sleep Prince by tiniest_hands_in_all_the_land very cute and amusing. The last part is the best!! Also, alternativename for Eraser: Energy Saver. my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

Rice by scrawly_times school prioritize mental health of both staff and students!!!my hero Academia; teen; AllMight

The Two Best People in the World by Vagabond insecure Present Mic my hero academia; Mature; AllEraserMic

Adventures in Babysitting by VeryImportantDemon little Iida!! Confirmation that I am Iida (delayed talking, then full sentences). The first in the series is good too. my hero Academia; teen; EraserMic

bOnE?!?!?!? By Vicstaria77 goofy short fic my hero Academia; Not Rated; EraserMic

You better by Asahi_san aka I'm a strong independent hero and I don't NEED my husband :( my hero Academia; Not Rated; EraserMic

Just Enough by Thunder_the_Wolf I commented that I relate to a degree to Hizashi and the author. my hero Academia; Not Rated; EraserMic

Grounded by Aryagraceling from the same series as a fic further up. ^ ponder...my hero Academia; Teen; Aizawa

By the Numbers by ill go with that then (Linelenagain) very cute high school erasermic my hero Academia; Teen; EraserMic

EraserMic Week 2019 by Ryoukon 8 fan arts with fic recommended. Some of my favorites are already shared before this.my hero Academia

whipped by dvntldrr comiserating mom friendsmy hero Academia; Not Rated; Aizawa & Bakugou

Memories by dykenezukor short and sweet get together. my hero Academia; Not Rated; EraserMic

Day Five: Rebuilt by goatman_entrapment "Anyways listen to All Might, kids! Trauma changes you, and that's okay! take the time to mourn the things you've lost so you can start building yourself up from what you've gained!" -author note my hero Academia; Not Rated; EraserMic

Nightmares and Pillowforts by xxInksxx little listener, strong heros admitting fear but coping my hero Academia; Not Rated; Aizawa-Yamada family

Poetry in Motion by xxInksxx cute high school erasermicmy hero Academia; General; EraserMic

Class 1-A cuddle routine by lisanna44 CUTE! my hero Academia; Not Rated

Soothing by DisastrouslyYours innocent intimacy, long hair my hero Academia; Not Rated; EraserMic

EraerMic Week fics by TheGoodKindOfNerdy ch2. ADORABLE! Ch7 amusing... MY HERO ACADEMIA; Not Rated; EraserMic

Fragile Mind by SaltywithSarcasm sweet comfort to anxieties my hero Academia; General; EraserMic

A Fresh Coat of Polish by WearyQueeryReader Aizawa is an amazing teacher! Defying his past...my hero Academia; Not Rated; Aizawa

the skeletons inside of us by firelord_zutara cute AU no quirks with a band, has music recommendations at end of ch2 my hero Academia; teen; EraserMic

A Total Eclipse of Rationality by impulsewriter (trilogycal) cute my hero acadamia; Mature; EraserMic

Day Six: Appreciated by goatman_entrapment cute father's day ficmy hero academia; General

Grounding by SaltywithSarcasm anxiety supportmy hero acadamia; teen; EraserMic

Kinktober 2019- My hero Academia! By Alexander_the_great_nerd ch13 of 31, there's others too like ch11 my hero academia; E; Todoroki/Izuku, various

Relinquishment and Safekeeping by DarklingMoon yes! *blush* my hero acadamia; Explicit; EraserMic

Please Say You Miss Me by MintIceTea very cute! Pre-relationship my heroAcademia; General; EraserMic

One Of Those Days by ghoulvoided once again, i relate to a smaller degree My hero acadamia; General; EraserMic

Duplicated Adoration by BirbIsTheWirb Adorable! And what an opener "To those who know Eraserhead, he is a man of apathy and enigma. And to those who know Aizawa Shouta, he is a man who cares too much for his own good and an emotional catastrophe, but Aizawa will argue to Pluto and back that that is falsified information" my hero Academia; Teen and up; EraserMic

i’ll give it all, take my heart by SammyD adorable and cute laugh :) my hero academia; General; Shinsou and Kaminari

Shouta's Favorite Sound by deafmic later found on a soft fluff fic rec my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

A Little Longer by deafmic sweet in the face of ugly my hero academia; teen; Shinsou & Dadzawa

Obstacles by deafmic cute, especially Shinso's love of erasermy hero academia; teen; Dadzawa and preschool teacher Yamada

The Curious Disappearance of Aizawa Shouta by deafmic wow... my hero academia; teen; Aizawa

Snowed In by deafmic at under school age a canvas tent collapsed over me and an adult, clothing racks protected us but it was still rattling. I was afraid of thunderstorms for a while. my hero academia; General; Shinsou

Helper by deafmic Aizawa is a good teacher my hero academia; General; Aizawa & Tsuyu

Biggest Fan by deafmic AWWW! my hero academia; General; pre canon Shinsou & Aizawa

A Different Kind of Hero by deafmic cute my hero academia; General; Aizawa & Eri

Second Chances by deafmic cute pre canon connected to present; also eraser head costume! my hero academia; General; Izuku & Shinsou

You Can Sing Me Anything by donniedont I relate to Aizawa's disappearing concept. I was tired and felt like I just made people's lives harder, but even so suicide was not a struggle of mine. It frustrated me a lot when people assumed that. It felt like they weren't listening to me. This story was very interesting, from the view point of a cis straight demisexual with a genderfluid sibling. my hero academia; Mature; EraserMic

A Lesson In Opening Up by AWHOOPS ponder, admitting what you want. my hero academia; Explicit

Goggles by modernmint comments my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Aphrodisiac by SenkoWakimarinr either demisexual or some other form of acespec (terminology?), very chill my hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Have Their Cake And Eat It Too by VulcanAizawa kinky foursome relationship my hero Academia; Explicit;

What's Mine Is Yours by Snekpoetryhor took some time to include it but after I found myself rereading it a few times… my hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

geyser by Spineless comments my hero academia; General; Izuku & Dadzawa & Dad Might & good friends

Absence by SaltywithSarcasm Hizashi is lonely and wants to spend time with his best friend my hero academia; teen

Affluence by modernmint sweet and cute slow burn my hero academia ; Explicit; EraserMic; Single dad Aizawa no quirks AU

Many Hands by rhoen Aizawa and Yamada want Yagi my hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Four Of Them Oh God by Snekpoetry quirk whammie means 4 All Mights from different points in his life my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMight

Dreaming about you by SaltywithSarcasm lewd dreams making it difficult to sleepmy hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

September by deafmic sweet and caring in the face of pain, good teacher Aizawamy hero academia; teen; Asui & Aizawa

Lemon Boy by modernmint Aizawa has a blanket! As an adultwith a teddy bear, this is really nice. my hero academia; General; Aizawa & Present Mic

Can't Sit Still by Bronzeflower relatable, found lookingforanother recommended ficmy hero academia; General; EraserMic

Days of My Future Husband's Past by YamiHeart recommended as cute fluffy erasermic via tumblrmy hero academia; teen; EraserMic

Housewarming by KuriKuri cute AU my hero academia; teen; AllEraserMic

One in a Billion by YamiHeart Soul Eater AU. Another fandom I like my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

The One and Only by YamiHeart great little au my hero academia; General; EraserMic

Thinking of You by MintIceTea soulmate AU that i enjoyed, short my hero Academia; teen; EraserMic

Merry Month of Masturbation 2020 Edition by Sonamae ch5 is linked, ch9, ch23, ch26? is a good one too my hero Academia; Explicit

The Ways We Are Loved by Vagabond soooo good! Love and friendship isn't black and white but more of an ombre...my hero academia; Explicit; All Might; Aizawa, Present Mic, Midnight

Kinktober 2018 (BNHA) by Tazii this is ch23 which is cute my hero Academia; Explicit;

Radio Lullaby by TummieStix so Cute!! my hero academia; General; Eri

Reach for the Stars by Demyrie Aizawa stuggles with past trauma, Eri is adorable and class 1-A loves her my hero academia; General; alight EraserMight

All-Nighter by tiniest_hands_in_all_the_land very cute my hero academia; General; Shinsou & Eri

How Did You Do It? By almagwillschu rough but caring my hero Academia; General; Shinsou & Dadzawa

Dead Men Can’t Pet Any Cats by ANoGoodPigeonr rough patch with humor my hero academia; General; Shinsou & Aizawa

Lucky cat by deafmic ADORABLE my hero academia; General; Shinsou

More Than Shinsou Was Promised by keishouta good if you need to cry but has a happier ending my hero Academia; Not Rated; Aizawa & Shinsou

my hero Academia works by keishouta short, emotional my hero academia;

Firsts by keishouta literally fluffmy hero academia; General; Aizawa & Yamada

Showing Him by AgarJelly they show All Might that he's lovedmy hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Alls Well by goatman_entrapment everyone dealing with emotions and finding family!!! my hero academia; General; Series

Shout & Mute by ill go with that then (Linelenagain) the radio show!my hero Academia; teen; EraserMic

Truth Quirks Are A Double-Edged Sword by bravobeavo comments my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Patchwork Family by bravobeavo sweet in the face of injury my hero academia; teen; EraserMic family

All Dressed in Black by a_mug_of_ether feeling sexy... my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Consequences of Quirking by SaltywithSarcasm two separate reading I wanted to give kudos, so that might say somethingmy hero academia; General; EraserMic

Vanilla by a_mug_of_ether emphasizing the sweet simple moments of being together with sex; this is part 4, part 3 is interesting too my hero Academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Never the Good, Just the Bad and the Ugly by deafmic i think this is a reread... my hero academia; teen; Aizawa

Showing Him by AgarJelly sat in my unsure folder, but aftwr rereading it a bunch I realized I should include it here my hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Another Type of Education by BlitheFool a good laugh my hero academia; teen;

Class 1-d(A)ycare by teaandtumblr cute with hard emotions and a surprise my hero academia; General; Aizawa daycare teacher

we were made of stardust (so i wished on you) by Ibelieveinahappilyeverafter found via a comic on tumblr that I sadly misplaced my hero academia; teen; Shinsou & Aizawa, Shinsou & Yamada

The Waiting Area by MarziPanda95 long haul, worry that finds a good ending somehowmy hero academia; teen; EraserMic

No Man is an Island by mistye_dawne longer one, mic centric, emotional my hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Day of Rest by luxurias friends caring for each other my heroAcademia; teen; AllEraserMic & Midnight

Loud, Proud, and a Non-binary Pal. By Arkham_Cat comments my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

Teach me to be angry. By Arkham_Cat emotions can be difficultmy hero academia; rating; Iida & Bakugou

It’s a Red Day by Arkham_Cat it sucks that he goes through that, but it seems as if his family knows how to handle it systematicallymy hero academia; rating; Shinsou & parental EraserMic

BNHA pride 2020 by Arkham_Cat so much going on since each chapter stands alone mostlymy hero academia; teen;

Surprises by MikeWritesThings much cute!! my hero academia; General; Aizawa & class 1A + Shinsou

Shouta Aizawa's Weapon: Origin by MikeWritesThings 1. Baby Tenya, 2. Aizawa capture weapon origin!my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

The Right Thing by UnoriginalToast cute my hero academia; General; Dadzawa & Eri

Eight Weeks With Eri by b00mgh soooo much fluff and goodness! Highly recommended! my hero academia; General; Eri & class 1A

Aizawa's Experiences as a Teacher by Soralith comments my hero academia; General; Dadzawa

yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery by braveandthebold cheeky 10yr old my hero academia; General; Eri & Dadzawa

Aizawa and Eri by angel_ponders very cute Series of super short storiesmy hero academia; General

Lonely Painful Mornings by angel_ponders comments my hero academia; teen; AllEraserMic

Snowy morning by Saku015 short and CUTE! MY hero academia; General; Dadzawa & Eri

Nii-chan by Saku015 very cute my hero academia; General; Shinsou & Eri

Kittens and Family Names by Saku015r the author has a bunch of fluff! My hero academia; General; Eri & Shinsou

bass boosted by happywinks i love Tenya knowing about EraserMic my hero academia; General; Shinson...

look what happens with a love like that-- it lights up the whole sky by Maebee cute!! Secret "mission" my hero academia; General; Hizashi & Eri

and i started to feel like i actually matter by Maebee Eri is adorablemy hero academia; General; Hizashi

the stick-together family by Maebee awww my hero academia; teen; Eri & EraserMic

All in Good Time by bravobeavo oblivious dopes :) my hero academia; General; EraserMic

Echo by yamadadzawa (liarielle) comments my hero academia; General; Shinsou & Midoriya

I Would Understand by deafmic i read if before and I don't know why I didn't already include it unless it was end of last year. Really like it and the author! my hero academia; teen; Shinsou & Dadzawa

Last (First) Adventure by deafmic much flailing, and yes the author explains some of the user namesmy hero academia; teen; Shinsou

Come Listen! By deafmic adorable! Could fit in the same universe as others by the author… my hero academia; teen; Shinsou & dad mic

'Cause I know that I am yours and you are mine by Balinese87 cheesy and sweet my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

They say I'm caught up in a dream by Balinese87 cute my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

Alone Together - Erasermic Prompt Week by Maebee cute collection my hero academia; mostly General; EraserMic

like the dawn you broke the dark and my whole earth shook by softjourney so sweet my hero academia; General; Eri

Kinktober 2019-and other smutty prompts! By Alexander_the_great_nerd Chapter 11 and ch3 [had to refind because it stuck with me unexpectedly my hero academia; Explicit;

take a break from seeing the world by Maebee short and sweet my hero academia; teen; EraserMic

(Il)logical by DarklingMoon i relate to Aizawa, while my chosen crush didn't really hit and was never told. The story of getting together with my boyfriend is funny. my hero academia; Mature; EraserMic

Day 12: Drunken Sex by Shinjitsu-san (Lyna_Laufeyson) not taking sex too seriously(Also CHECK OUT the series and spin off series!!) my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Day 4: Blindfolds by SlicedMilk ponder my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

pretty in pink by afancyghost Shouta in a skirt + praise my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

Come To Your Place, Start a Rumor by Sacramental_Wine suggestion on dealing with sexual performance anxiety my hero academia; Explicit; Amajiki Tamaki/Toogata Mirio

You're So Sweet by Snekpoetry pops into my head every so often my hero academia; Explicit; AllMight/FatGum

BlondeLungs by Wendigobait at first I wasn't sure, but then it stayed on my mind a bit my hero academia; Explicit; AllEraserMic

Leave My Pikachu Alone! (A Story About Shinsou's Gay Panic and Defending His Friend) by PastaMic cute my hero academia; teen; Shinsou & Kaminari

Workload by modernmintor Tenya, the struggle to balance life with mental health, relatablemy hero academia; teen; Iida brothers

Purple Best Boi's How-To Guide to Life by daddyissueswho funny cackle worthy series my hero academia; teen; Shinsou & EraserMic

Stretch Marks and Mentors by wittyjinx part 4 in "Bakugou cares" found because of "Safety In Numbers"my hero academia; General; Bakugou helps Yazorozu

Sexual Healing by Sassywrites77 cute sexual moment my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMight

circumbinary orbit by saigen anxiety during sexmy hero Academia; Explicit; The Big Three

Mute Mind by DarklingMoonor comments my hero academia; Explicit; EraserMic

[grigori77]

2020 in Movies - My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 2)

20.  ONWARD – Disney and Pixar’s best digitally animated family feature of 2020 (beating the admittedly impressive Soul to the punch) clearly has a love of fantasy roleplay games like Dungeons & Dragons, its quirky modern-day AU take populated by fantastical races and creatures seemingly tailor-made for the geek crowd … needless to say, me and many of my friends absolutely loved it.  That doesn’t mean that the classic Disney ideals of love, family and believing in yourself have been side-lined in favour of fan-service – this is as heartfelt, affecting and tearful as their previous standouts, albeit with plenty of literal magic added to the metaphorical kind.  The central premise is a clever one – once upon a time, magic was commonplace, but over the years technology came along to make life easier, so that in the present day the various races (elves, centaurs, fauns, pixies, goblins and trolls among others) get along fine without it. Then timid elf Ian Lightfoot (Tom Holland) receives a wizard’s staff for his sixteenth birthday, a bequeathed gift from his father, who died before he was born, with instructions for a spell that could bring him back to life for one whole day.  Encouraged by his brash, over-confident wannabe adventurer elder brother Barley (Chris Pratt), Ian tries it out, only for the spell to backfire, leaving them with the animated bottom half of their father and just 24 hours to find a means to restore the rest of him before time runs out.  Cue an “epic quest” … needless to say, this is another top-notch offering from the original masters of the craft, a fun, affecting and thoroughly infectious family-friendly romp with a winning sense of humour and inspired, flawless world-building.  Holland and Pratt are both fantastic, their instantly believable, ill-at-ease little/big brother chemistry effortlessly driving the story through its ingenious paces, and the ensuing emotional fireworks are hilarious and heart-breaking in equal measure, while there’s typically excellent support from Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Elaine from Seinfeld) as Ian and Barley’s put-upon but supportive mum, Laurel, Octavia Spencer as once-mighty adventurer-turned-restaurateur “Corey” the Manticore and Mel Rodriguez (Getting On, The Last Man On Earth) as overbearing centaur cop (and Laurel’s new boyfriend) Colt Bronco.  The film marks the sophomore feature gig for Dan Scanlon, who debuted with 2013’s sequel Monsters University, and while that was enjoyable enough I ultimately found it non-essential – no such verdict can be levelled against THIS film, the writer-director delivering magnificently in all categories, while the animation team have outdone themselves in every scene, from the exquisite environments and character/creature designs to some fantastic (and frequently delightfully bonkers) set-pieces, while there’s a veritable riot of brilliant RPG in-jokes to delight geekier viewers (gelatinous cube! XD).  Massive, unadulterated fun, frequently hilarious and absolutely BURSTING with Disney’s trademark heart, this was ALMOST my animated feature of the year.  More on that later …

19.  THE GENTLEMEN – Guy Ritchie’s been having a rough time with his last few movies (The Man From UNCLE didn’t do too bad but it wasn’t exactly a hit and was largely overlooked or simply ignored, while intended franchise-starter King Arthur: Legend of the Sword was largely derided and suffered badly on release, dying a quick death financially – it’s a shame on both counts, because I really liked them), so it’s nice to see him having some proper success with his latest, even if he has basically reverted to type to do it.  Still, when his newest London gangster flick is THIS GOOD it seems churlish to quibble – this really is what he does best, bringing together a collection of colourful geezers and shaking up their status quo, then standing back and letting us enjoy the bloody, expletive-riddled results. This particularly motley crew is another winning selection, led by Matthew McConaughey as ruthlessly successful cannabis baron Mickey Pearson, who’s looking to retire from the game by selling off his massive and highly lucrative enterprise for a most tidy sum (some $400,000,000 to be precise) to up-and-coming fellow American ex-pat Matthew Berger (Succession’s Jeremy Strong, oozing sleazy charm), only for local Chinese triad Dry Eye (Crazy Rich Asians’ Henry Golding, chewing the scenery with enthusiasm) to start throwing spanners into the works with the intention of nabbing the deal for himself for a significant discount.  Needless to say Mickey’s not about to let that happen … McConaughey is ON FIRE here, the best he’s been since Dallas Buyers Club in my opinion, clearly having great fun sinking his teeth into this rich character and Ritchie’s typically sparkling, razor-witted dialogue, and he’s ably supported by a quality ensemble cast, particularly co-star Charlie Hunnam as Mickey’s ice-cold, steel-nerved right-hand-man Raymond Smith, Downton Abbey’s Michelle Dockery as his classy, strong-willed wife Rosalind, Colin Farrell as a wise-cracking, quietly exasperated MMA trainer and small-time hood simply known as the Coach (who gets many of the film’s best lines), and, most notably, Hugh Grant as the film’s nominal narrator, thoroughly morally bankrupt private investigator Fletcher, who consistently steals the film.  This is Guy Ritchie at his very best – a twisty rug-puller of a plot that constantly leaves you guessing, brilliantly observed and richly drawn characters you can’t help loving in spite of the fact there’s not a single hero among them, a deliciously unapologetic, politically incorrect sense of humour and a killer soundtrack.  Getting the cinematic year off to a phenomenal start, it’s EASILY Ritchie’s best film since Sherlock Holmes, and a strong call-back to the heady days of Snatch (STILL my favourite) and Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels.  Here’s hoping he’s on a roll again, eh?

18.  SPONTANEOUS – one of the year’s biggest under-the-radar surprise hits for me was one which I actually might not have caught if things had been a little more normal and ordered.  Thankfully with all the lockdown and cinematic shutdown bollocks going on, this fantastically subversive and deeply satirical indie teen comedy horror came along at the perfect time, and I completely flipped out over it.  Now those who know me know I don’t tend to gravitate towards teen cinema, but like all those other exceptions I’ve loved over the years, this one had a brilliantly compulsive hook I just couldn’t turn down – small-town high-schooler Mara (Knives Out and Netflix’ Cursed’s Katherine Langford) is your typical cool outsider kid, smart, snarky and just putting up with the scene until she can graduate and get as far away as possible … until one day in her senior year one of her classmates just inexplicably explodes. Like her peers, she’s shocked and she mourns, then starts to move on … until it happens again.  As the death toll among the senior class begins to mount, it becomes clear something weird is going on, but Mara has other things on her mind because the crisis has, for her, had an unexpected benefit – without it she wouldn’t have fallen in love with like-minded oddball new kid Dylan (Lean On Pete and Words On Bathroom Walls’ Charlie Plummer). The future’s looking bright, but only if they can both live to see it … this is a wickedly intelligent film, powered by a skilfully executed script and a wonderfully likeable young cast who consistently steer their characters around the potential cliched pitfalls of this kind of cinema, while debuting writer-director Brian Duffield (already a rising star thanks to scripts for Underwater, The Babysitter and blacklist darling Jane Got a Gun among others) show he’s got as much talent and flair for crafting truly inspired cinema as he has for thinking it up in the first place, delivering some impressively offbeat set-pieces and several neat twists you frequently don’t see coming ahead of time.  Langford and Plummer as a sassy, spicy pair who are easy to root for without ever getting cloying or sweet, while there’s glowing support from the likes of Hayley Law (Rioverdale, Altered Carbon, The New Romantic) as Mara’s best friend Tess, Piper Perabo and Transparent’s Rob Huebel as her increasingly concerned parents, and Insecure’s Yvonne Orji as Agent Rosetti, the beleaguered government employee sent to spearhead the investigation into exactly what’s happening to these kids.  Quirky, offbeat and endlessly inventive, this is one of those interesting instances where I’m glad they pushed the horror elements into the background so we could concentrate on the comedy, but more importantly these wonderfully well-realised and vital characters – there are some skilfully executed shocks, but far more deep belly laughs, and there’s bucketloads of heart to eclipse the gore.  Another winning debut from a talent I intend to watch with great interest in the future.

17.  HAMILTON – arriving just as Black Lives Matter reached fever-pitch levels, this feature presentation of the runaway Broadway musical smash-hit could not have been better timed. Shot over three nights during the show’s 2016 run with the original cast and cut together with specially created “setup shots”, it’s an immersive experience that at once puts you right in amongst the audience (at times almost a character themselves, never seen but DEFINITELY heard) but also lets you experience the action up close.  And what action – it’s an incredible show, a thoroughly fascinating piece of work that reads like something very staid and proper on paper (an all-encompassing biographical account of the life and times of American Founding Father Alexander Hamilton) but, in execution, becomes something very different and EXTREMELY vital.  The execution certainly couldn’t be further from the usual period biopic fare this kind of historical subject matter usually gets (although in the face of recent high quality revisionist takes like Marie Antoinette, The Great and Tesla it’s not SO surprising), while the cast is not at all what you’d expect – with very few notable exceptions the cast is almost entirely people of colour, despite the fact that the real life individuals they’re playing were all very white indeed.  Every single one of them is also an absolute revelation – the show’s writer-composer Lin-Manuel Miranda (already riding high on the success of In the Heights) carries the central role of Hamilton with effortless charm and raw star power, Leslie Odom Jr. (Smash, Murder On the Orient Express) is duplicitously complex as his constant nemesis Aaron Burr, Christopher Jackson (In the Heights, Moana, Bull) oozes integrity and nobility as his mentor and friend George Washington, Phillipa Soo is sweet and classy as his wife Eliza while Renée Elise Goldsberry (The Immortal Life of Henrietta Jacks, Altered Carbon) is fiery and statuesque as her sister Angelica Schuyler (the one who got away), and Jonathan Groff (Mindhunter) consistently steals every scene he’s in as fiendish yet childish fan favourite King George III, but the show (and the film) ultimately belongs to veritable powerhouse Daveed Diggs (Blindspotting, The Good Lord Bird) in a spectacular duel role, starting subtly but gaining scene-stealing momentum as French Revolutionary Gilbert du Motier, the Marquis de Lafayette, before EXPLODING onto the stage in the second half as indomitable third American President Thomas Jefferson.  Not having seen the stage show, I was taken completely by surprise by this, revelling in its revisionist genius and offbeat, quirky hip-hop charm, spellbound by the skilful ease with which is takes the sometimes quite dull historical fact and skews it into something consistently entertaining and absorbing, transported by the catchy earworm musical numbers and thoroughly tickled by the delightfully cheeky sense of humour strung throughout (at least when I wasn’t having my heart broken by moments of raw dramatic power). Altogether it’s a pretty unique cinematic experience I wish I could have actually gotten to see on the big screen, and one I’ve consistently recommended to all my friends, even the ones who don’t usually like musicals.  As far as I’m concerned it doesn’t need a proper Les Misérables style screen adaptation – this is about as perfect a presentation as the show could possibly hope for.

16.  SPUTNIK – summer’s horror highlight (despite SERIOUSLY tough competition) was a guaranteed sleeper hit that I almost missed entirely, stumbling across the trailer one day on YouTube and getting bowled over by its potential, prompting me to hunt it down by any means necessary.  The feature debut of Russian director Egor Abramenko, this first contact sci-fi chiller is about as far from E.T. as it’s possible to get, sharing some of the same DNA as Carpenter’s The Thing but proudly carving its own path with consummate skill and definitely signalling great things to come from its brand new helmer and relative unknown screenwriters Oleg Malovichko and Andrei Zolotarev.  Oksana Akinshina (probably best known in the West for her powerful climactic cameo in The Bourne Supremacy) is the beating heart of the film as neurophysiologist Tatyana Yuryevna Klimova, brought in to aid in the investigation in the Russian wilderness circa 1983 after an orbital research mission goes horribly wrong.  One of the cosmonauts dies horribly, while the other, Konstantin (The Duelist’s Pyotr Fyodorov) seems unharmed, but it quickly becomes clear that he’s now the host for something decidedly extraterrestrial and potentially terrifying, and as Tatyana becomes more deeply embroiled in her assignment she comes to realise that her superiors, particularly mysterious Red Army project leader Colonel Semiradov (The PyraMMMid’s Fyodor Bondarchuk), have far more insidious plans for Konstantin and his new “friend” than she could ever imagine. This is about as dark, intense and nightmarish as this particular sub-genre gets, a magnificently icky body horror that slowly builds its tension as we’re gradually exposed to the various truths and the awful gravity of the situation slowly reveals itself, punctuated by skilfully executed shocks and some particularly horrifying moments when the evils inflicted by the humans in charge prove far worse than anything the alien can do, while the ridiculously talented writers have a field day pulling the rug out from under us again and again, never going for the obvious twist and keeping us guessing right to the devastating ending, while the beautifully crafted digital creature effects are nothing short of astonishing and thoroughly creepy.  Akinshina dominates the film with her unbridled grace, vulnerability and integrity, the relationship that develops between Tatyana and Konstantin (Fyodorov delivering a beautifully understated turn belying deep inner turmoil) feeling realistically earned as it goes from tentatively wary to tragically bittersweet, while Bondarchuk invests the Colonel with a nuanced air of tarnished authority and restrained brutality that made him one of my top screen villains for the year.  One of 2020’s great sleeper hits, I can’t speak of this film highly enough – it’s a genuine revelation, an instant classic for whom I’ll sing its praises for years to come, and I wish enormous future success to all the creative talents involved.

15.  THE INVISIBLE MAN – looks like third time’s a charm for Leigh Whannell, writer-director of my ALMOST horror movie of the year (more on that later) – while he’s had immense success as a horror writer over the years (co-creator of both the Saw and Insidious franchises), as a director his first two features haven’t exactly set the world alight, with debut Insidious: Chapter III garnering similar takes to the rest of the series but ultimately turning out to be a bit of a damp squib quality-wise, while his second feature Upgrade was a stone-cold masterpiece that was (rightly) EXTREMELY well received critically, but ultimately snuck in under the radar and has remained a stubbornly hidden gem since. No such problems with his third feature, though – his latest collaboration with producer Jason Blum and the insanely lucrative Blumhouse Pictures has proven a massive hit both financially AND with reviewers, and deservedly so.  Having given up on trying to create a shared cinematic universe inhabited by their classic monsters, Universal resolved to concentrate on standalones to showcase their elite properties, and their first try is a rousing success, Whannell bringing HG Wells’ dark and devious human monster smack into the 21st Century as only he can.  The result is a surprisingly subtle piece of work, much more a lethally precise exercise in cinematic sleight of hand and extraordinary acting than flashy visual effects, strictly adhering to the Blumhouse credo of maximum returns for minimum bucks as the story is stripped down to its bare essentials and allowed to play out without any unnecessary weight.  The Handmaid’s Tale’s Elizabeth Moss once again confirms what a masterful actress she is as she brings all her performing weapons to bear in the role of Cecelia “Cee” Kass, the cloistered wife of affluent but monstrously abusive optics pioneer Aidan Griffin (Netflix’ The Haunting of Hill House’s Oliver Jackson-Cohen), who escapes his clutches in the furiously tense opening sequence and goes to ground with the help of her closest childhood friend, San Francisco cop James Lanier (Leverage’s Aldis Hodge) and his teenage daughter Sydney (A Wrinkle in Time’s Storm Reid).  Two weeks later, Aidan commits suicide, leaving Cee with a fortune to start her life over (with the proviso that she’s never ruled mentally incompetent), but as she tries to find her way in the world again little things start going wrong for her, and she begins to question if there might be something insidious going on.  As her nerves start to unravel, she begins to suspect that Aidan is still alive, still very much in her life, fiendishly toying with her and her friends, but no-one can see him.  Whannell plays her paranoia up for all it’s worth, skilfully teasing out the scares so that, just like her friends, we begin to wonder if it might all be in her head after all, before a spectacular mid-movie reveal throws the switch into high gear and the true threat becomes clear.  The lion’s share of the film’s immense success must of course go to Moss – her performance is BEYOND a revelation, a blistering career best that totally powers the whole enterprise, and it goes without saying that she’s the best thing in this.  Even so, she has sterling support from Hodge and Reid, as well as Love Child’s Harriet Dyer as Cee’s estranged big sister Emily and Wonderland’s Michael Dorman as Adrian’s slimy, spineless lawyer brother Tom, and, while he doesn’t have much actual (ahem) “screen time”, Jackson-Cohen delivers a fantastically icy, subtly malevolent turn which casts a large “shadow” over the film.  This is one of my very favourite Blumhouse films, a pitch-perfect psychological chiller that keeps the tension cranked up unbearably tight and never lets go, Whannell once again displaying uncanny skill with expert jump-scares, knuckle-whitening chills and a truly astounding standout set-piece that easily goes down as one of the top action sequences of 2020. Undoubtedly the best version of Wells’ story to date, this goes a long way in repairing the damage of Universal’s abortive “Dark Universe” efforts, as well as showcasing a filmmaking master at the very height of his talents.

14.  EXTRACTION – the Coronavirus certainly has threw a massive spanner in the works of the year’s cinematic calendar – among many other casualties to the blockbuster shunt, the latest (and most long-awaited) MCU movie, Black Widow, should have opened to further record-breaking box office success at the end of spring, but instead the theatres were all closed and virtually all the heavyweights were pushed back or shelved indefinitely.  Thank God, then, for the streaming services, particularly Hulu, Amazon and Netflix, the latter of which provided a perfect movie for us to see through the key transition into the summer blockbuster season, an explosively flashy big budget action thriller ushered in by MCU alumni the Russo Brothers (who produced and co-wrote this adaptation of Ciudad, a graphic novel that Joe Russo co-created with Ande Parks and Fernando Leon Gonzalez) and barely able to contain the sheer star-power wattage of its lead, Thor himself.  Chris Hemsworth plays Tyler Rake, a former Australian SAS operative who hires out his services to an extraction operation under the command of mercenary Nik Khan (The Patience Stone’s Golshifteh Farahani), brought in to liberate Ovi Mahajan (Rudhraksh Jaiswal in his first major role), the pre-teen son of incarcerated Indian crime lord Ovi Sr. (Pankaj Tripathi), who has been abducted by Bangladeshi rival Amir Asif (Priyanshu Painyuli).  The rescue itself goes perfectly, but when the time comes for the hand-off the team is double-crossed and Tyler is left stranded in the middle of Dhaka with no choice but to keep Ovi alive as every corrupt cop and street gang in the city closes in around them.  This is the feature debut of Sam Hargrave, the latest stuntman to try his hand at directing, so he certainly knows his way around an action set-piece, and the result is a thoroughly breathless adrenaline rush of a film, bursting at the seams with spectacular fights, gun battles and car chases, dominated by a stunning sustained sequence that plays out in one long shot, guaranteed to leave jaws lying on the floor.  Not that there should be any surprise – Hargrave cut his teeth as a stunt coordinator for the Russos on Captain America: Civil War and their Avengers films.  That said, he displays strong talent for the quieter disciplines of filmmaking too, delivering quality character development and drawing out consistently noteworthy performances from his cast.  Of course, Hemsworth can do the action stuff in his sleep, but there’s a lot more to Tyler than just his muscle, the MCU veteran investing him with real wounded vulnerability and a tragic fatalism which colours every scene, while Jaiswal is exceptional throughout, showing plenty of promise for the future, and there’s strong support from Farahani and Painyuli, as well as Stranger Things’ David Harbour as world-weary retired merc Gaspard, and a particularly impressive, muscular turn from Randeep Hooda (Once Upon a Time in Mumbai) as Saju, a former Para and Ovi’s bodyguard, who’s determined to take possession of the boy himself, even if he has to go through Tyler to get him.  This is action cinema that really deserves to be seen on the big screen – I watched it twice in a week and would happily have paid for two trips to the cinema for it if I could have.  As we looked down the barrel of a summer season largely devoid of blockbuster fare, I couldn’t recommend this enough.  Thank the gods for Netflix …

13.  THE TRIAL OF THE CHICAGO 7 – although it’s definitely a film that really benefitted enormously from releasing on Netflix during the various lockdowns, this was one of the blessed few I actually got to see during one of the UK’s frustratingly rare lulls when cinemas were actually OPEN.  Rather perversely it therefore became one of my favourite cinematic experiences of 2020, but then I’m just as much a fan of well-made cerebral films as I am of the big, immersive blockbuster EXPERIENCES, so this probably still would have been a standout in a normal year. Certainly if this was a purely CRITICAL list for the year this probably would have placed high in the Top Ten … Aaron Sorkin is a writer whose work I have ardently admired ever since he went from esteemed playwright to in-demand talent for both the big screen AND the small with A Few Good Men, and TTOTC7 is just another in a long line of consistently impressive, flawlessly written works rife with addictive quickfire dialogue, beautifully observed characters and rewardingly propulsive narrative storytelling (therefore resting comfortably amongst the well-respected likes of The West Wing, Charlie Wilson’s War, Moneyball and The Social Network).  It also marks his second feature as a director (after fascinating and incendiary debut Molly’s Game), and once again he’s gone for true story over fiction, tackling the still controversial subject of the infamous 1968 trial of the “ringleaders” of the infamous riots which marred Chicago’s Diplomatic National Convention five months earlier, in which thousands of hippies and college students protesting the Vietnam War clashed with police.  Spurred on by the newly-instated Presidential Administration of Richard Nixon to make some examples, hungry up-and-coming prosecutor Richard Schultz (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is confident in his case, while the Seven – who include respected and astute student activist Tom Hayden (Eddie Redmayne) and confrontational counterculture firebrands Abbie Hoffman (Sacha Baron Cohen) and Jerry Rubin (Succession’s Jeremy Strong) – are the clear underdogs.  They’re a divided bunch (particularly Hayden and Hoffman, who never mince their words about what little regard they hold for each other), and they’re up against the combined might of the U.S. Government, while all they have on their side is pro-bono lawyer and civil rights activist William Kunstler (Mark Rylance), who’s sharp, driven and thoroughly committed to the cause but clearly massively outmatched … not to mention the fact that the judge presiding over the case is Julius Hoffman (Frank Langella), a fierce and uncompromising conservative who’s clearly 100% on the Administration’s side, and who might in fact be stark raving mad (he also frequently goes to great lengths to make it clear to all concerned that he is NOT related to Abbie).  Much as we’ve come to expect from Sorkin, this is cinema of grand ideals and strong characters, not big spectacle and hard action, and all the better for it – he’s proved time and again that he’s one of the very best creative minds in Hollywood when it comes to intelligent, thought-provoking and engrossing thinking-man’s entertainment, and this is pure par for the course, keeping us glued to the screen from the skilfully-executed whirlwind introductory montage to the powerfully cathartic climax, and every varied and brilliant scene in-between.  This is heady stuff, focusing on what’s still an extremely thorny issue made all the more urgently relevant and timely given what was (and still is) going on in American politics at the time, and everyone involved here was clearly fully committed to making the film as palpable, powerful and resonant as possible for the viewer, no matter their nationality or political inclination.  Also typical for a Sorkin film, the cast are exceptional, everyone clearly having the wildest time getting their teeth into their finely-drawn characters and that magnificent dialogue – Redmayne and Baron Cohen are compellingly complimentary intellectual antagonists given their radically different approaches and their roles’ polar opposite energies, while Rylance delivers another pitch-perfect, simply ASTOUNDING performance that once again marks him as one of the very best actors of his generation, and there are particularly meaty turns from Strong, Langella, Aquaman’s Yahya Abdul-Mateen II (as besieged Black Panther Bobby Seale) and a potent late appearance from Michael Keaton that sear themselves into the memory long after viewing. Altogether then, this is a phenomenal film which deserves to be seen no matter the format, a thought-provoking and undeniably IMPORTANT masterwork from a master cinematic storyteller that says as much about the world we live in now as the decidedly turbulent times it portrays …

12.  GREYHOUND – when the cinemas closed back in March, the fate of many of the major summer blockbusters we’d been looking forward to was thrown into terrible doubt. Some were pushed back to more amenable dates in the autumn or winter (which even then ultimately proved frustratingly ambitious), others knocked back a whole year to fill summer slots for 2021, but more than a few simply dropped off the radar entirely with the terrible words “postponed until further notice” stamped on them, and I lamented them all, this one in particular.  It hung in there longer than some, stubbornly holding onto its June release slot for as long as possible, but eventually it gave up the ghost too … but thanks to Apple TV+, not for long, ultimately releasing less than a month later than intended.  Thankfully the film itself was worth the fuss, a taut World War II suspense thriller that’s all killer, no filler – set during the infamous Battle of the Atlantic, it portrays the constant life-or-death struggle faced by the Allied warships assigned to escort the transport convoys as they crossed the ocean, defending their charges from German U-boats.  Adapted from C.S. Forester’s famous 1955 novel The Good Shepherd by Tom Hanks and directed by Aaron Schneider (Get Low), the narrative focuses on the crew of the escort leader, American destroyer USS Fletcher, codenamed “Greyhound”, and in particular its captain, Commander Ernest Krause (Hanks), a career sailor serving his first command.  As they cross “the Pit”, the most dangerous middle stretch of the journey where they spend days without air-cover, they find themselves shadowed by “the Wolf Pack”, a particularly cunning group of German submarines that begin to pick away at the convoy’s stragglers.  Faced with daunting odds, a dwindling supply of vital depth-charges and a ruthless, persistent enemy, Krause must make hard choices to bring his ships home safe … jumping into the thick of the action within the first ten minutes and maintaining its tension for the remainder of the trim 90-minute run, this is screen suspense par excellence, a sleek textbook example of how to craft a compelling big screen knuckle-whitener with zero fat and maximum reward, delivering a series of desperate naval scraps packed with hide-and-seek intensity, heart-in-mouth near-misses and fist-in-air cathartic payoffs by the bucket-load.  Hanks is subtly magnificent, the calm centre of the narrative storm as a supposed newcomer to this battle arena who could have been BORN for it, bringing to mind his similarly unflappable in Captain Phillips and certainly not suffering by comparison; by and large he’s the focus point, but other crew members make strong (if sometimes quite brief) impressions, particularly Stephen Graham as Krause’s reliably seasoned XO, Lt. Commander Charlie Cole, The Magnificent Seven’s Manuel Garcia-Rulfo and Just Mercy’s Rob Morgan, while Elisabeth Shue does a lot with a very small part in brief flashbacks as Krause’s fiancée Evelyn. Relentless, exhilarating and thoroughly unforgettable, this was one of the true action highlights of the summer, and one hell of a war flick.  I’m so glad it made the cut for the summer …

11.  PROJECT POWER – with Marvel and DC pushing their tent-pole titles back in the face of COVID, the usual superhero antics we’ve come to expect for the summer were pretty thin on the ground in 2020, leading us to find our geeky fan thrills elsewhere. Unfortunately, pickings were frustratingly slim – Korean comic book actioner Gundala was entertaining but workmanlike, while Thor AU Mortal was underwhelming despite strong direction from Troll Hunter’s André Øvredal, and The New Mutants just got shat on by the studio and its distributors and no mistake – thank the Gods, then, for Netflix, once again riding to the rescue with this enjoyably offbeat super-thriller, which takes an intriguing central premise and really runs with it.  New designer drug Power has hit the streets of New Orleans, able to give anyone who takes it a superpower for five minutes … the only problem is, until you try it, you don’t know what your own unique talent is – for some, it could mean five minutes of invisibility, or insane levels of super-strength, but other powers can be potentially lethal, the really unlucky buggers just blowing up on the spot.  Robin (The Hate U Give’s Dominique Fishback) is a teenage Power-pusher with dreams of becoming a rap star, dealing the pills so she can help her diabetic mum; Frank Shaver (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is one of her customers, a police detective who uses his power of near invulnerability to even the playing field when supercharged crims cause a disturbance.  Their lives are turned upside down when Art (Jamie Foxx) arrives in town – he’s a seriously badass ex-soldier determined to hunt down the source of Power by any means necessary, and he’s not above tearing the Big Easy apart to do it. This is a fun, gleefully infectious rollercoaster that doesn’t take itself too seriously, revelling in the anarchic potential of its premise and crafting some suitably OTT effects-driven chaos brought to pleasingly visceral fruition by its skilfully inventive director, Ariel Schulman (Catfish, Nerve, Viral), while Mattson Tomlin (the screenwriter of the DCEU’s oft-delayed, incendiary headline act The Batman) takes the story in some very interesting directions and poses fascinating questions about what Power’s TRULY capable of.  Gordon-Levitt and Fishback are both brilliant, the latter particularly impressing in what’s sure to be a major breakthrough role for her, and the friendship their characters share is pretty adorable, while Foxx really is a force to be reckoned with, pretty chill even when he’s in deep shit but fully capable of turning into a bona fide killing machine at the flip of a switch, and there’s strong support from Westworld’s Rodrigo Santoro as Biggie, Power’s delightfully oily kingpin, Courtney B. Vance as Frank’s by-the-book superior, Captain Crane, Amy Landecker as Gardner, the morally bankrupt CIA spook responsible for the drug’s production, and Machine Gun Kelly as Newt, a Power dealer whose pyrotechnic “gift” really isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.  Exciting, inventive, frequently amusing and infectiously likeable, this was some of the most uncomplicated cinematic fun I had all summer.  Not bad for something which I’m sure was originally destined to become one of the season’s B-list features …

[elminx]

Energy Update: 2021

So you think '21 is gonna be a good year...has anyone else been singing The Who for weeks now?  Or is that just me - it is certainly not generationally appropriate for me to know every line to Tommy but here I am...

2021 is going to be a very different year energetically from 2020 but there are some common elements.   For one thing, Saturn is going to play one of the starring rolls all year as it slowly makes its way through Aquarius and squares Uranus in Taurus a whooping 3x (almost four...it just barely misses a fourth exact conjunction).    It's safe to say that things aren't going to get easy anytime soon.

And...that's okay.   Easy wouldn't even make sense after the year that we have had.    We're still applying a lot of pressure to the cooker we call life but it has morphed quite a bit.

2021 is a 5 year numerologically - 5 years tend to be driven and energetic with perhaps a bit of frenetic thrown in for good measure.   Things happen fast in 5 years - they tend to herald great change.   Everything tends to move a little bit faster so it's a good year to schedule your downtime (and stick to it!), to watch how fast you are driving, and to watch out for mania or other symptoms of an overactive brain/nervous system.   Depending on your nervous system and temperament - you may jive well with 5 energy or feel really put off by it.   There's no "meh" in 5 energy - it's all love or hate. 

It's also a number very associated with breaking free from the structure of the "4" (2020 was a 4 year) - this is echoed with the astrology of the year.   In February alone, there will be six planets in the sign of Aquarius - including our heavy hitters Jupiter and Saturn - and Aquarius is the sign of the revolutionary.    Jupiter and Saturn will remain in Aquarius (basically) all year - as I've said before, 2021 is the Great Unbinding.

The overall theme of 2021 is resoundingly freedom, but at what cost?    This is an idea that we will have to experience as a global whole, as a culture, as individuals, and within our family and social groups.

Something has got to give - a lot of somethings, actually.   The big astrological weather of the year is that (as mentioned above) Saturn in Aquarius will square Uranus in Taurus 3x (2/17, 6/15, and 12/24) while coming close to a fourth conjunction for 12 days in September as well.    This is a clash of the titans - Saturn wants to create structure and Uranus' singular job is to break that structure down.

What is old, what is outdated, anything that does not serve the now, that does not serve the path forward has got to go.   

That sounds so easy when you write it down.  If only we all agreed on the future path and what has to go!  There will, unfortunately, be little compromise to be had when Taurus and Aquarius square off.  This isn't going to be the year to get others to see your way - your best bet is going to have to be to let them do what they are going to do and hope for the best.

I see the lesson in this - we're coming hard out of a year that was built around boundaries.   Saturn in Capricorn reigned hard on the message that we HAD to stay home and wear a mask.   But there was a deeper more subtle lesson - the only thing that you can control in your life is yourself.  The only thing that you can do is put on your own mask.   You can ask other people to do - but what they do is on them.    And the consequences - no matter how dire - need to be on them.

People get really stubborn when faced with Saturnian lessons that they don't want to face.   We are going to see a lot more of this - now that Saturn has entered Aquarius for good (of note - Saturn briefly entered Aquarius in March of 2020...you may see where I'm going here) - Saturn in Aquarius very much has the "but my freedoms" feel to it.   We can extrapolate on what that might mean globally or culturally as we continue to battle this pandemic but I want to talk about it as it might happen personally.

2021 is gonna be a year of "Don't Tell Me What To Do" - expect the people in your life (including yourself) to balk STRONGLY against perceived restrictions over the course of the year.   If you start to feel that way, you are right on time.   If you see it in others, try and cut them some slack - Aquarian energy wants and needs to come to its own conclusions, in its own time.  

This is going to be a year when you may need to let people in your life fall flat on their faces as they run into a wall of their own design.  This is really hard for perpetual "fixer" types, I know.  This is not a year where you are going to be able to fix other people - if you need to fix someone, you are gonna have to fix yourself.   If you try to course correct another during 2021, expect a full-on toddler level tantrum of "Don't tell me what to do!  Don't Tell me what to do!  Don't tell me what to do!!!!!!!"

Again, that is a Saturnian boundary - now of the Aquarian variety rather than Capricorn.    People don't learn from the mistakes that we don't let them make.  Read that one again twice.

I've probably given you a lot to chew on - verbosity is also a very Aquarian trait.  Of note, both our Mercury retrograde cycles and our eclipse cycles fall entirely in the air-fire signs in the coming year - if you've got a problem, 2021 would be a great year to write it out.  Start a journal.  Start a blog.  Hell, write a book if that's your jam!    Find the skills and a strategy for keeping yourself in your own business and out of other people's.   Even your partners/besties/parents/children.

There are going to be some major upsets - relationships, long term business partnerships, other long-term contractual agreements are going to come to an end.     If that is something that scares you in particular in relation to your own life - it's a sign that there's still some work to be done.  Remember: more freedom, not less.

You can support/follow me:  Kofi / Blog/ Insta

[courtorderedcake]

Majestically Too Far Beyond : CSSNS 2020

It’s finally here! Yaaaay! Here’s my @cssns​ for 2020, Majestically Too Far Beyond, title based on the Poem written by Komal Kapoor. You can read my explanation of how this mess all got started Here. Art is by @kmomof4​ and I threw in some too for fun. 

Summary :  Emma Swan has never been that type of girl, you know, the one that cries and sinks into a pint of ice cream after a break-up. She's never ever cared about anyone other than completely out of survival, but then came Neal, and then came the final big break up with someone maybe she sort of kind of loved. So now she is one of those girls who are homeless, living with her adopted brother and his wife at their farm in a long abandoned Victorian keeper's home, desperately trying to save to get her own place while working her difficult government job and as a merc witch on the side.  When a desperate Witch calls on her to do a spell, it's all bad news - but then said Witch revealed a mountain of gold coins, and whimpered that Emma is her only hope. How can she not be a bad ass magic savior for this poor soul? All seems to be well, until the consequences are suddenly very real.  Killian may be a Demon, a fallen Angel that now delights in the practice of revenge, but first and foremost he's a gentleman. Sort of.  Especially when his ruddy Angel brother is focused on bureaucracy and keeping mankind out of chaos, while Killian barely keeps his denizens as safe as he can in a world that wants Demons dead. Witches and Warlocks use them for parts, Werewolves see them as a threat, Angels mostly still hold on to the ancient feud regardless of their treatise, Fae stay chaotic neutral, Vampires don't care for others affairs - it's a perilous world where hate crimes happen without consequence. When Killian goes above to plead for more safety laws in the metropolis of Hyperion Hills, the city that lies over a major portal to hell, he does not expect to meet a council that the elemental five sit on. He especially doesn't expect that the council would ever take him seriously in his campaign for demon safety. Regina, Snow, Ariel, Elsa, and Belle seem dead set on making it their pet project - each for their own very different reasons. Especially when they bring up hiring a tempestuous security consultant, Emma Swan. When they adjourn, he can say that he is optimistically apprehensive. An optimistic Demon never leads to good things, unless by good things you mean throwing back rum while chasing a pretty woman for plundering. He's unsure of what to expect when challenged to do shot for shot by a mysterious blonde Witch, who didn't care who (or what) he is, but he does like a challenge. Too much in fact, the challenge raising the stakes, because from there on it becomes a blur, and yeah, he's bloody well in it now. The idea of a contract sounds fantastic when they stumbled into the strange tower, half naked and wanting. It's the ritual she does instead that he should have been paying attention to. So, maybe now he's missing a hand, and has only the vaguest idea of what happened from the mess of blood he's woken up to, his and someone else's, a mirror's accursed magic the only thing to tell him what took place: he's a prisoner until someone lets him free… And a woman that he’s positive did not exist in his life yesterday, who just happens to not only be a Witch but a complete stranger, is pregnant with his child. 

Rated E, but really falls in at more of a M. Fluffy angst with some adult themes and hinted undertones.  READ ON AO3 HERE.

Chapter 1 - Long ago, eclipses were feared as well:

To say that the Jones 'Brothers' had been fighting since time began, was not an understatement, but also not exactly truthful. They had actually been fighting before recorded time, and before there was even a concept of the perception of anything besides the aether or eternity.

That's why he'd fallen, actually. Loss was a powerful motivation, enough even to question the utmost Authority - and the Authority despised questioning. Fighting was in the nature of the divine Celestials, as it seemed, and in Her infinite curiosity that She defined as 'Wisdom', God had let Lucifer burn too brightly. Their war was a lover's jealous quarrel turned violent. 

Although Liam was created moments before Killian, they were brothers (as it were) even amongst a host of angels, and they were close regardless of their stubborn spats. They fought over the world and its workings, Liam given a flaming sword while Killian was given books. They fought over knowledge of the divine arts, arguing whether humans were worthy of the Arcane. They fought over Killian's love of a mortal woman, and his questioning of commandments. 

They fought over Killian standing behind Lucifer, and Liam fought Killian right before he fell. In some ways, it was Liam's own hand that pushed Killian, but in his last angelic act, Killian forgave his brother. 

While Earthborne and some remnant Angels believed Demons were not capable of love, they were of course wrong. Demons loved, lost, and forgave just as any others. Even after the schism, even after years of passive aggressive pettiness between both sides, Demons were still seen as wayward, dark, demented creatures. Angels had done little to fight this stereotype, instead reveling in their continued status as goodwill ambassadors. 

Even their name amongst mortals was a cosmic joke, the Creator and her lover-made-antagonist too long gone to bother with proper names. They were Angels or Demons to some cultures as humans grew on God's abandoned project, while others called them by their new names. 

The Angel Diana was called a Goddess alongside Hecate, Freya, Gabriel, Uriel, and many others. The Demons Zeus, Odin, Loki, Hades, and Poseidon happily took on roles that suited their carnal needs. Angels mixed with mortals along with Demons, God's secret seeds of elemental magics taking life along beside them as Druids, Fae, and Elementals.  Some of the Celestials even birthed life as their lost parents had, Demons begetting Demons, Angels begetting Angels, and everything or anything in between. 

Humans gained magical prowess as the world changed, Witches, Druids, Warlocks, Mortismals, and Mesmerels becoming the norm for human bloodlines. 

Still, Demons were given less, all because God had cursed them irrevocably before disappearing with Lucifer into the abyss. They were cellularly different now than any of the Angels they had once been, a yoke around their neck that they could be forced to obey. Like Angels, they could be worshipped, called, trapped, or contracted even as their powers and bodies twisted into the curse stained strangeness God graced them with. They were looked on with disgust, pity, horror, and anger for it despite their best attempts.

Which was why his sodding Ponce of a brother working as an Angel ambassador for a Prince of Hell was so important - and so bloody frustrating. 

It wasn't as if being a Prince of Hell wasn't stressful enough - his people always under siege or afraid of some Witch summoning them to place a brand, then using them as a charcuterie board - no. It was that his brother was a baked potato when it came to convincing the public they were not what millennia of ingrained hatred had established Demons as. 

Bosch had died before Killian could uppercut him, regardless of his depiction of Liam as a trumpeting ferret bird or the even less flattering version of Killian. Dante had been another great PR stunt his brother had botched miserably. The Rings of Hell weren't even used, Lucifer gone before he could put God's plans for punishment into place. Now as a museum and reenactment park, it was a popular attraction that helped generate funds for the denizens that lived in the spacial plane that surrounded it, but Dante's review had been swayed by Liam taking him into The Kingdom right after. How could Hell ever live up to the paradise God herself had planned for humans? Only Cedar Point, Busch Gardens, Disney, or Universal Studios could come close as far as themed parks. It was a complete disaster. 

This newest idea of Killian sitting on the board of Hyperion Heights to work with the world's premier intersectional coven, 'StoryBrooke', was another terrible idea in the making, and Killian had no qualms letting his brother know it.

"This is absolutely ridiculous Liam," Killian gritted out, itching under the glamor that made him look mortal. Being confined in a skin suit had his molecules vibrating so loudly he could hear his canines, starlight and cosmic fire sending pinpricks of goose flesh down the dark hairs of his arms and legs. Wearing this was torture enough without Liam staring at him in disdain, his own heavenly image unblemished. Even his halo was a polished gold around his fat head. "While I am a dashing rapscallion in my original skin, don't you think it's bad form for them to see me like this instead of how I actually look? Isn't the point of this to show that even if we're not as pretty as your lot, we're still beings that deserve respect?"

Liam grunted, rolling his eyes. Blue fire from explosions of stars and galaxies lit in mirrors of Killian's own, but framed by rosy cheeks and tawny curls instead of moving shadow, a ghoulish pallor, and dark hair the color of ink or raven's feather. The Angelic glamor contained the haze of darkness that moved like smoke around him, the length of his fingers and claws, and made his flesh look pale but not tinted the color of the universe's light. It did not hide his horns (remnants of shattered halo) or his twitching tail if someone chose to leave eyes on him too long, but that was another Demonic burden to bear. 

"First impressions, little brother. Even the most progressive Witch is still a Witch. I'd rather them see you like this instead of wondering if you truly need all your giblets."

Killian swallowed hard, nodding once before grumbling, "Younger brother. Younger."

"Go over your notes again. You'll need to be your nauseatingly charming self for this, especially if they bring the males in their midst," Liam asked of him, and Killian looked out the dark windows of the car as his tail moved in agitation. 

"Regina. Head of the Coven, Witch and Mortismal that inherited her throne from her mother. Began the integration method and broke away from the Misthaven Coven to create the StoryBrooke one," Killian intoned. 

"Right. She's a tough nut too, and her ghosts do the most of her dirty work. She's not someone to cross unless you want your chairs stacked to the ceiling every morning by some bloody poltergeist." 

"Aw, well, I'm unfortunately haunted by you already, I doubt a poltergeist could do more damage." Killian slanted a look at his brother, who gave an annoyed huff as his pure white feathers ruffled. Killian was thankful in part that he did not have wings at all times, even if the trade off was painful. "While Regina is the head of the Coven, the head of the Council is Elsa Frost of the Frost twins. She's a direct descendant of the Giant Ice Sorceresses with powerful magic, but her passion is creating legislation for Hyperion Heights. Her sister Anna is the family's public relations face, and runs their fashion empire, Arendelle Designs with her Druid husband."

"Good. Good, tell me about Ariel Poisson."

"Siren and Mermaid, with four years on the council. Made history as the first water Elemental to sit on the council, beating the long seated Witch, Ursula, by a large margin. Opponents argue that her father's position as King of the seas and his dominion over fair weather and fishing made voters nervous to not cast ballots for her. Her campaign slogan was 'Part of your World', which could be beneficial to my campaign." 

"Right. Snow Blanchard?" 

"Would-be heir to the Misthaven Coven who ended its elitist reign by breaking tradition and leaving, sending them into chaos." Killian smirked. "She sounds like someone who I could get along with."

"She gets along with everyone except her family, which is more than normal it would seem," Liam replied back, and Killian snorted out a chuckle. 

"Druid, Elf, and Green Witch. Runs a high profile herbal apothecary chain Enchanted Forest Supplies, focused on holistic medicinals, herbs, and spices. Nolan Farms is a subsidiary that sells produce to the Heights, which is her husband's 'pet' project."

"Watch yourself, brother," Liam warned. "While you might get away with that if it's just the Witches, if David and Ruby sit in today you'll find that will not stand."

"Ah, yes. Ruby Reddings and David 'Charming' Nolan. You only circled that they are Werewolves in red ink everywhere you could. David is Snow's husband, and her lead farm hand. Ruby is Snow's cousin who introduced the two. Ruby is currently in a high profile relationship with your colleague, Inspector Wolfe, and they both are very active in pack politics. Many are betting they will create their own pack if the current Alphas do not abandon some of the more ancient doctrines. Nothing new there."

"Don't forget Livre and Fa."

"Belle Livre, Witch turned Vampire, runs a community literacy foundation and bookstore chain. Known ally to Demon rights. Soft spoken but brutally intelligent. Introduced a synthetic blood that allows for daytime living via plant cells collaborating with Enchanted Forest, which made history 6 years ago," Killian listed. "Mulan Fa, Vampire. Cultural Development head of the Heights, and curator of The Hyperion Heights Museum of Art, History, Science, and Culture. Teaches part time at Hyperion Heights University as an adjunct professor. Fa is married to a Fae Elf, Merida Ursa."

"Good. That's as far as we know besides the whole Swan fiasco, which is not to be brought up."

"What Swan fiasco?" 

"Oh, little brother. If you had done your research outside of the profiles I gave you, you would know all about the criminal history of the black and heartless sheep within the Misthaven and StoryBrooke covens. It's better off that you don't know."

"Er. Well. Alright. I didn't look into them because I don't bloody well care about their lots as long as we get protection. There was another slaying this weekend. A Lower Demon."

"I'm aware. Did you know her?" 

"Not really, but that's not enough either. I owe my people more. The other Lords of Hell are fine telling Demons to stay below and never use their name, which is fine for the new blood. It's the old, the weak, and the abused that are at risk."

"Careful, Killian. Your lust for vengeance will never be welcomed by mortals."

"I'm well aware Liam. They like my kind for an entirely different kind of lust."

"Could you please not." Liam sighed, sitting back against the seat. After a moment, his brother spoke quietly. "There was another attack as well, this time in broad daylight in Camelot Town. The Anti-Integration Movement has claimed responsibility."

"Of bloody course they have!" Killian hissed, clenching his fists. He pinched the bridge of his nose, grimacing. "Brilliant. Just absolutely marvelous -" 

"They were going to run a story in the Times. I managed to block it for now, but we need a sympathetic writer on the inside, or we risk them running another story with their bias."

"I have a guy. I'll reach out, he's an old school Warlock who I've worked with in the past on push back. What's their excuse this time?" 

"They said that the Succubus was, quote, 'asking for it by the way she was dressed'."

Nausea rose in Killian's throat, and he swallowed it down with bitter practice. "I wasn't aware that how someone dressed meant their lives were not only void, but taking pieces of them was fine as well."

"We know they're being funded well, and we will get arrests as soon as possible. This won't be forever, Killian."

"That's easy for you to promise when this has been my - our forever." Killian bit out, glaring at his feet.

The car came to a stop, the driver opening the door to let them out. Killian moved briskly up the steps of the council building, as Liam followed behind. They moved through the lobby with an easy flash of Liam's ID that Killian scoffed at, moving into the elevator. 

"After that display, I'm going drinking after this," Killian gritted through his teeth. 

Liam blinked, straightening his tie in the door's polished reflection. "What display? They were nice."

"Exactly. If I came here alone, I would have been in that security line for an hour." 

Liam rolled his eyes, taking down his halo to polish the golden ring. "You absolutely exaggerate how you're treated. Not everyone is out to get you, especially when you look like this. Give others a break."

"I'll give myself a break after this with as much rum as I can safely consume, instead."

The doors pinged open to reveal a small atrium, dark wood flooring in stark contrast to the birch tree covered walls. A secretary stood behind a rounded desk against the far wall, motioning for them to sit. 

"They'll be with you in a moment," she offered, glancing at them with a thin smile. Killian could practically taste her distrust as he scratched behind his ear. Liam swatted at him lightly in a bid to get him to stop, both of them tense when the doors finally opened to reveal a petite woman dressed in a powder blue skirt and blazer. 

"Come in gentleman. The council will see you now." She smiled icily. His brother stood, his feathers slightly puffed in an indication of his own nervousness. 

Killian followed a second later, walking with them as they made forced, but pleasant conversation all the way into the boardroom. 

Women sat at a long table that curved slightly, facing their own small table similar to a courtroom. He was reminded of the tribunals in the old days when law had begun, but the courtiers were far different than the strange group of women scrutinizing them. 

To his surprise, the majority of them seemed actually curious instead of repulsed or bored. 

"The council recognizes Liam Jones and Killian… Jones. These are your chosen surnames, correct? And you identify as… brothers?" 

"Yes," Liam stated firmly with a curt nod. Killian watched from his peripheral as his shoulder muscles twitched, his wings held stiffly upright to keep them from the floor. 

Killian nodded, careful to keep his tail curled around his legs. The skin suit itched as it clung to him, not abated by his attempt to sit more casually. 

"Interesting," remarked the dark haired witch at the far right. A nameplate sat in front of her, marking her as Regina. He wondered idly if her stare was due to the blood on his hands only an eternal existence could bring. 

"You are here to ask for help in creating safety measures and a potential council commitment to Demon rights, correct?" Ariel, a fiery haired lass with a heart face, asked. 

"Our major point of concern is the influx of hate groups that seem to fall in line with smuggling operations and planned violence," Killian said slowly. Attention snapped to him, and he brought up the slide presentation he had prepared. "We have had some luck stopping shipments and arresting bit players, but we can't find the heads of these operations."

"You can't find them, or you are barred from digging deeper?" Mulan asked, and he chuckled darkly. 

"The latter, I'm afraid. We have consistently come to the same dead end again and again. I'm sure I don't have to explain to you ladies how difficult a foe powerful covens behind corporate entities are." He let a grimace creep onto his face, and saw the majority of the women nod in acknowledgement. 

"This could make many enemies for us, if approached in the wrong way." Belle stated quietly. "Specifically with our good friends in the Storybrooke Coven."

Snow nodded, exchanging a bitter look with her. "We may need a professional from our coven, but she's unable to get clearance without special notation."

"Oh? Who is this?" Liam asked. 

Elsa and the rest of the coven smiled in varying degrees of fondness. "The best in the business, and in my Coven. If you need to find someone, Emma Swan can always find them, and she's good at criminal magical activities. She knows the system, knows how and where to hide, and where to seek."

They'd found what the coven wanted, and their stake in the venture. Killian caught Liam's face falling, his eyes narrowing into slits. 

"You can't be serious. Involving Swan in this after -" 

"That was all a misunderstanding, and was blown completely out of proportion. We have long held up our end of the blame and accountability, while Misthaven has shirked theirs in the name of slandering her." Elsa steepled her fingers. "If you desire the best, which I assume is why you are here, you need to rehab not only Demons’ image, but hers as well. She should be sitting here with us."

Liam tried in vain to tip the scale back in their favor, his face going red. "We'll consider this as part of our negotiations."

"Negotiations? Liam, you are a detective. You should have deduced by now that you have no leverage. You have only decisions to make." Regina closed her planner, regarding them with her dark gaze. "So, make them quickly, before our patience wanes."

Killian bit back a laugh at Liam’s sudden blustered stuttering. These witches were good, and as the meeting ran on for hours he realized just how much liquor he would need to recover. 

 "Well that went well." 

Liam’s sour expression and slumped shoulders were just visible in his peripheral, even as his feathers were still quite literally ruffled. He huffed out a noise of disapproval, too vexed to even reply back. 

"Aye to that, brother." Licking his lips, they stepped into the cool dusk air. "I'm going for that drink, are you…?" Killian glanced at Liam, who shook his head with annoyance. 

"Seriously? You really -" 

"Really shouldn't what Liam?" Killian smiled, venom leaking into his tone. "Go get drunk in a town that would rather pretend I don't exist or sell me in a fine powder to the nearest bidder? I think I'll be okay, although the concern is duly noted."

He turned on his heel, his glamor falling away in a puff of smoke. The air hit his itchy, overheated skin, his tail whipping around in sharp, agitated flicks. 

"Take care of yourself, little brother! No need to be a self destructive bastard. We lost a battle, not the war!" Liam called after him, stepping into his sleek car. Killian snorted. 

Hailing a cab with some difficulty, the driver asked where he was headed with the same slight resignation he was used to for his kind. 

"A bar, Demon friendly please. Some place without swill."

The driver nodded, dropping him at a dimly lit corner of the city. A red neon sign spread crimson light along the sidewalk, soft light also spilling out the doors accompanied by loud guitar. Looking up, the looping, swirled lettering made him smirk. 'The Jealous Flask' was as good a place as any in his neck of the underworld woods. 

The inside was smoky, deep red damask wallpaper paired with dark, pitch stained wood panels, booths, and bartop. The liquor selection was displayed neatly, unlike the few early patrons sitting scattered around. The jukebox played warbly rock music, some punchy chords and an easy to memorize refrain. 

'one two three four, can I have a little more, five six seven eight nine ten, I love you' 

The bar stools were empty, and Killian slung himself onto one, the bartender nodding his head by way of a greeting. 

"Rum, neat," Killian stated, pointing to his preferred vice. The bartender did not stop polishing the glass in his hand, but the bottle floated down gently, pouring itself into a tumbler before the glass set itself down in front of Killian. "Thanks, mate."

The bartender nodded again, continuing his work with the aid of his magic. People began to trickle in as the time ticked forward, a witch or two eyeing him suspiciously, vampires playing pool in the front, a group of young werewolves forcing change into the jukebox to get edgier music playing through the speaker system. The Clash crooned out words against the Fae Queen ruling over greater Eld, the pack jumping around excitedly and thrashing their heads back and forth. By this time Killian had moved to the far curve of the bar, his glass refilled to the point of the bottle sitting next to him like a patient date. There were still no other Demons in his presence. It shouldn't have surprised him, shouldn't have even made him angry with the amount of violence they were privy to, but he burned away the emotions with the alcohol flowing down his throat. 

A soft touch on his shoulder caught his attention, and he turned with a growl. It died in his throat when large eyes met his, blonde curls falling in front of her eyes in loose tendrils. 

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to bother you," she stammered, biting her lip. Pointing to a drink that was clearly not his, umbrella and all, she continued. "I was trying to reach my drink. It’s gotten crowded and I thought, I mean, I am sorry I wasn't trying to -" 

"Aye." He nodded, throwing back his drink. "S'alright lass. I'm sorry, I s'pose I'm just a bit out of place here."

She smiled, blushing. "Yeah, I uh, I get that. I haven't seen you around before."

"First time here. I was in the neighborhood for business." He poured himself more, and to his surprise she pushed and elbowed her way to sit next to him. 

"Business?" Her eyes were curious while her fingers toyed with the umbrella in her drink. "Should I be concerned?" 

It was clearly teasing, and Killian felt himself loosening up around her. She seemed to read him well, or at least the alcohol was working. "Not any of the good kind, I'm afraid." He grinned with a wink. 

"Ah, so we're just ships passing in the night?" She leaned in and he could smell the floral and herbal scent of her, her eyelashes batting coquettishly as she sipped her drink in his space. 

"Passing closely, I hope," he murmured. His heart raced; it had been ages since any mortal had shown interest in him that was mutual. 

His head spun as she met him drink for drink, hand unsubtly creeping higher up his hip. 

"Would you be opposed to… Maybe, I don't know… getting out of here?" 

"Are you saying you would fancy a nightcap, lass?" She smiled from under her lashes while biting her lip, and his heated blood grew hotter. 

"Perhaps." She stood with grace as she extended a hand to him. "My place is a quick and easy teleportation spell away from here, and my bed doesn't require any sort of magic outside of what I can do with my tongue." 

Killian hesitated, her golden hair in the glow of the lights making her seem to shimmer. "I don't even know your name -" 

"Eloise. It's Eloise." She pulled him up, letting him stumble into her body. Her lips met his, and soon he was pulling her closer as their mouths slanted across one another's in hunger. She bit his lip and he felt the tightness that had bloomed in his belly spread fire down his spine. 

"Lead the way, love," he whispered huskily, grinding into her. 

She smiled broadly, the world shifting until he was in her dimly lit home. A lone window twinkled starlight, moon huge outside as it hung in the sky. Her tongue slid past his lips, the bitter herbal taste overwhelming while the world shifted again, this time pulling him apart. 

 In a perfect world, Emma Swan would not be doing anything remotely close to what she was currently debating doing. It truly wasn't her fault; it fell on Neal and his stupid family if anyone was to blame, and his stupid coven with their stupid leader. She should have known back then it had been a set up, should have known that Neal was a fucking liar. How many times did the same drawn out plot have to play out? Apparently, too many, considering she had still warmed his bed until a week ago. 

This time it was final. Emma wouldn't accept him back when Neal slithered out from under the rock he had his affair in. She wouldn't be charmed by his smooth talking silver tongue, and if he so much as breathed near her, she would take another five years for breaking his smarmy Fae nose. Final. It had to be final. 

But finality meant certain conditions had to be met, especially if she was to ward him away. For one, the beautiful loft that belonged to Neal in the Heights downtown could definitely not be her base of operations any more. Neither could the various in between places she found where Emma could grieve until he took her back, damaged goods and all. No more hotel rooms, no more abandoned apartments, no more warehouses, vacation rentals, or quiet empty offices. She had to get her own place, and it had to be able to handle her particularly finicky magic. Neal's place wasn't great for her particular practice, but the view had been killer enough to ignore it. Neal's fortune had meant she didn't need to work, and with her record (or, as his coven would sneer, 'notoriety') that was just as well. 

Working added a wrinkle to her life; she would have to find somewhere that allowed her enough space for her magic to keep her employed. That would require a hefty chunk of gold - if she was lucky. The prices in the downtown area were steep, only high profile Witches, Warlocks, Fae, and Celestials could afford accommodation that close to the capitol buildings and Ley Lines. Initially when Emma had glanced through the apartment listings on the bulletin board, she had almost had a panic attack at the amount of gold they demanded. 

Her brother David, blessings be, had been her knight in shining armor. There was a large Victorian home that lay in shambles at the edge of their farm lands, its beautiful scalloped details in need of paint, and the gutters growing weeds as thick as her forearm. But, it was within her budget if she could get the down payment placed before the scheduled demolition. She put what she had down to stall as much as she could, but it was not enough in the least. 

One big job was all she needed. One big job that she could cash out on. A dip of her toes back into the waters of peddling illegal magic, just quickly in and out without a splash. 

She didn't need any more jail time, that was for certain. 

Putting out the word she was available in the whisper market was always dangerous, but listening in was free and without a snag if you were smart. 

Emma heard tell of a desperate woman willing to give a truckload full of gold to the right Witch who could perform delicate, esoteric, deeply Arcane and forbidden magics. Luckily for both of them, that's what Emma excelled at. 

She had always been good at her craft, and her magical workings were beyond powerful. She could do things that other practitioners only dared to dream of, if they could even conceive it. It was why Neal had kept her around, and why his coven's dislike would melt away if she said she would consider joining. 

(If she did that around Yulesmas for better gifts, was it really so bad?) 

The request itself was intriguing, the woman herself a Witch that could not do the spell alone. She wanted an equivalent exchange of unbreakable magical bonds, which while tricky, was not forbidden in most circumstances. The offer was too good to pass up on, but Emma didn't like leaving things to complete chance. 

Cue her sister-in-law, Snow. If anyone could throw runes, read the winds, divine from the mundane, and not keep any of it a fucking secret, it was Snow. 

Emma knocked on their cheery red door in the early morning, which must have been a surprise to Snow considering she was half dressed in business wear. She pulled up her stockings in a one footed hop, motioning for Emma to come in as she balanced the phone receiver against her neck. The coiled cord spun around her, and she groaned loudly. 

"Yes, Regina, I know. I'll be there, I'm literally - it's 2 hours away. I will be there in thirty minutes at latest, but - Well, yes, Emma just walked in." Snow gestured at a chair, and Emma sat, looking at her with an eyebrow raised. "Yes, I know it's early for her. I know. Uh huh. Yes. We will definitely put her on the table; it's absurd not to, considering - yes, I would love to talk to you about this in person as I've said - alright. Yes. Okay then, buh-bye." 

Sighing, Snow twirled, untwisting herself from the phone cord. She smoothed down her pencil skirt and blouse before looking straight at Emma with a curious stare. Her mouth twitched with annoyance as she spoke. 

"Now. To what do I owe the pleasure? I have a meeting with Celestials shortly, so." She waved a hand indicating the clock in the background. Turning to the counter, she opened up a cookie jar and removed a rolled cannabis cigarette, putting it between her lips and lighting it. 

Emma swallowed, watching the petite woman slide the purple lighter back in its space on their counter. "I just need you to divine something for me. A situation, with a woman who wants me to… to uh, do something."

Snow rolled her eyes, narrowing them to glare at Emma. "We are bringing you up as collateral in our meeting today, trying to get you a seat where you belong - on the council," Snow hissed. She pinched the bridge of her nose, taking a breath. 

"Please?" Emma asked innocently, batting her eyelashes for good measure. 

Snow sighed. "Alright. Picture the situation and the woman."

Emma focused on the description, the spellwork requested, the woman's pleas. She could feel Snow's magic engulf her, and the fuzziness that came with it as she wove threads out into the natural universe, time and space sending her back answers. 

A moment passed, and the feeling abruptly stopped as Snow shook her head. 

"This doesn't feel right," Snow said, taking a drag of her blunt. She exhaled, the thick smoke swirling into the shape of birds that dove through the air. Emma coughed, waving a hand in front of her face. "That woman… I don't know. She feels off."

Emma frowned, petulant that the answer was negative. "She's a Witch, and in trouble." 

"Have you rolled your runes?" Snow began to pull on her loafers, gathering her things. 

Emma chewed her lip. She had divined, or tried to, but had not found a concrete result. "Yeah, and they said it's… Questionable, but the end result leaves all parties happy. Tarot said basically the same thing."

Snow let out a little twittering laugh, pulling her purse up on her shoulder. "And how does Neal feel about it?"

"Neal doesn't need to feel any way about it. I… We… I broke it off." Emma looked at her shoes, then idly inspected the counters formica. "Forever this time." 

"Oh. Is that why you're here so early?" Snow's eyes went wide, a hand covering her mouth. "Oh, Emma, honey. I'm so sorry, I've just been under so much stress with Regina and this council. Wait, where are you staying? Oh no - are you homeless!? You mean it, you're never going back to that creep?"

"Never," Emma said firmly, even as her voice caught. "I'll find a place though, Snow. Don't worry." 

"So you are homeless, oh Emma, if I wasn't late - no. No. You know, I'll call Regina and cancel it, you need me more than -" 

"No, well, I mean -" Emma shook her head. "No. I'll stay here tonight if I have to, but you need to get to your meeting. I don't need Regina's wrath on top of everything else."

"You know you can stay here with us as long as you need, oh, Emma, I wish you had told me -" 

"I don't want to stay here. I can't work here, and I love you guys but you both are gross with your lovey dovey hippie -" 

"I get it, I get it." Snow grimaced. 

"So yeah, I need the money. I can't stay here, I need my own place… I put a tiny deposit on that Victorian down the road, but I need the full down payment to keep it." Emma shrugged. 

"The house at the --- Emma, that place is a breeze away from being condemned!" 

"No it's not," Emma groaned, rubbing her temple. "It's got good bones, and character. It just needs some… help."

"Well. I mean…" Snow hesitated, heading towards the door, as Emma followed. "Alright then. I'm just warning you, I get a terrible vibe from that woman and I could cancel this today, we could work out a plan. We have the money from the harvest. You could work for us or with David and help us with the roll outs in exchange for a loan. I'm organized, but the help would be appreciated if you're living so close… especially since I'm making sure that house is safely remodeled for you. I don't want you to end up with the roof falling on you or some gas line exploding." 

"You worry way too much, Snow."

"I hear the future through nature, and it's generally terrifying. Nature is terrifying. Excuse me for being cautious, and wanting to help you out."

Emma laughed as they walked out the door together, Snow rummaging in her bag for lipstick which she quickly applied. "Yeah well, you're also smoking weed so potent it could put an elephant to sleep. I don't want a loan from you."

"I'm not an elephant, Em. I'm an Elf. It'll take more than this to knock me on my ass." She smiled, extending a hand to squeeze Emma's shoulder. "Be careful, okay? No repeats."

"That wasn't -" Emma protested, but Snow cut her off with a sharp look. "Yeah, alright. 

"Good. I'll see you tonight, you're coming for dinner. No buts." Snow grinned, before disappearing with a puff of periwinkle smoke. 

Emma groaned, kicking dirt as she stalked away towards her new potential home. 

 In the final days before moving from the small basement apartment Emma rented, the dingy, unused, bare studio finally found some decoration in chalk outlines, herbs, and a large bubbling cauldron. It hadn't ever been a home or remotely close to one when Neal presented a better option, the bed untouched and unmade. It reminded Emma more of her prison cell than anything else, which offered a strange duality of comfort mixed with dread. It was fitting that she would meet to do this ritual here. 

Gothel arrived promptly for their 10 am arranged meeting in a well worn taupe cloak. She looked as desperate as the correspondences between them indicated, but Emma resolved to get this over with as quickly as possible. They shared a nod in the form of hellos, then Emma pointed to the cauldron.

"Let's begin, shall we?" Emma asked, and Gothel drew back her cloak to reveal her tired and gaunt looking face. 

"Yes. Let's. Your payment, with more upon completion." Gothel dropped a large purse on the counter, Emma immediately grabbing it and checking the contents. It was real, her heart soaring as she shoved it in her bag. 

"So, you are to give me a token of your will, usually blood, an animal you raised, or something that's valuable to you . Something you care about, that you are tied to that a severing will make you -"

"I give you the life of my first child," Gothel interrupted. 

Emma's eyes widened in surprise. "Oh." Biting her lip, she brushed back her braid. "That's… That's super Illegal. I…" 

"You wanted something heavy, you got it. There's a reason why I came to you; you have a reputation for doing things quietly. The reason you chose me is because you need the coin. Now, my terms. I know you provide healing. I want to keep myself young and strong - youthful immortality. Grant me this." The grin on her face unsettled Emma, Snow's warning in her mind. Nevertheless, the satchel of gold meant a secured home.

"Um. Alright. Are you sure, the life of your firstborn? That's a ways off, and the strength won't happen until -" 

"Do it. Do it now, I know the spell will be enacted when payment is due. I'm well studied - Breaking a bond with a child, specifically your first, will grant me the power I need. I know that I can't do this spell myself either, so here I am."

Emma gulped. "Okay. Let me get the texts."

Emma returned with her copper cauldron, pile of books, and spell components. Gothel's grin grew wider, her eyes gleaming at the sight of the tongues, eyes, crushed butterflies, and other more macabre ingredients the spell required. 

Feeling a low tug in her gut that something was wrong, Emma backed away from the altar. The other Witch seemed to shimmer, slightly in alarm, a glamor of some sort possibly covering her skin. Feeling even more unsettled, Emma shook her head. 

"I can't do this, listen -" 

"Please. Please you must, I need this to escape a curse. It's blood magic, almost unbreakable and impossible to escape on my own. Please." Emma heard no lies in her speech. "I admit that I have not been entirely truthful. While I was able to send you the gold easily, I am trapped, held against my will. I can only project myself to you. I was afraid to tell you, because I am desperate to rid myself of this curse." When no lies continued to register, Emma felt a deep sense of pity for the other witch. A blood magic binding was no joke; someone truly must have hated the poor woman. 

"Fine," Emma said, throwing her hands up. Gothel perked up slightly, hope in her eyes. Throwing the ingredients in the cauldron, a shimmering mist roiled over the edge as she spoke ancient words and stirred in the shape of long unused runes. Adding bones that melted in soapy bubbles and stirring with a long Pegasus feather that gradually turned to ash, she looked up at Gothel, who was wringing her hands anxiously.

"Your tokens?" Emma asked. 

Gothel waved a hand over the stained cloth; several of the woman's teeth, a long braid of her hair, and a large chunk of skin fell into the cauldron. The cauldron's contents began to boil, smoke curling in darkened serpentine tangles. 

Emma began the words, Latin, Arameric, the old tongue of the Pagans, Celtic, remnants of Gaul, flowing them together until speaking plainly to her own magic. 

"Blood of one that is two, child, mother, 

Blood of my own, tear them asunder, 

Thicker than wine, thicker than water, 

Ties that bind, bound to another, 

The womb that grows life, 

Kin cared for in kind, 

A payment for power, 

Remake the ties, lift, and unbind."

Scraping her hand against a dagger, Emma let her blood drop slowly into the brew, the words flowing out in the crimson rivulets. As she pulled away the wound closed from her own healing energy. 

"Cradle of moon within flesh, 

Remake that which is to be made, 

Your reflection removed, 

Mine in its stead.

Your burden is mine, 

Carried and held as your first, 

Blood of the two, child, mother, 

As they are born, you are cursed."

She looked at Gothel, who was still wringing her hands, long nails cutting into her palms. This magic was hopefully worth the price the woman had so freely paid. Breaking an infant and mother's bond to give to another was a great sacrifice, the magic comparable to true love, if not greater. The power the Witch would receive would hopefully free her from the curse, but also give her the strength she desired.

"It's done. You must cast your brand over the cauldron, and when you, you know," Emma turned around, holding herself tightly. Caught up in the thought of what she, Emma Swan, would even do with a child, she was unaware of the other Witch behind her scrambling to the cauldron or her deep disregard for anything she was saying. "Get pregnant, let me know. I'll handle that - Wait, what are you -" 

Gothel chuckled lowly, her brand in its arcane circle around the cauldron, neon lines of electricity like power that sparked and crackled. Emma felt her hair stand on end, small pebbles lifting off the stone floor as the cauldron shook. Smoke rose in heavy plumes, purple and a noxious mauve that made the air feel sticky, her lungs not able to fill all the way. Gothel's chuckle had turned into a wild cackle, her braided and matted hair like vines or a visage of Medusa. 

Gothel's voice was crazed, shrill as she pointed a gnarled finger at Emma. "This is it. This is it! I've done it, I'm free! Oh, you silly, stupid girl. Now nothing will ever stop me again!" 

Her laugh grew into a shriek of triumph as magic swirled around them, Emma watching as the woman in front of her disappeared. Gaping at what happened, Emma checked herself for any signs of curses or hexes, unsure of what had just taken place. 

To her surprise, no sign of magic lay on her that she could see. She wasn't cursed, the room wasn't jinxed, and the second payment… Emma quickly checked her purse, finding the large satchel of gold easily. The second sat where Gothel had discarded it without looking twice, and she picked it up hesitantly. It was heavy in her hands as she checked it again and again, realizing that for once in her life, everything was going right. 

 Three hours later, she owned the Victorian home down the road from her brother's farm, the first home she had ever truly called hers. 

 Living near her brother's home had its perks, and disadvantages, as Snow had hinted. For one, Snow was cooking for her every day, and Emma was positive she was going to gain several dress sizes if she didn't stop gorging on various pasta dishes while pouring her magic into restoring the wooden floor. 

A major downside was having her brother constantly fixing her house without her being aware. She'd been woken by him cleaning the gutters, fixing her porch, and of all things, roofing. It had only been a few days, but between his insistence on the outside being presentable and her own work inside, the house was coming along faster than she ever dreamed. It was frightening, and David kept her on edge with his very obvious attempts at snooping around. 

"So, you're done with Neal for good," he said, startling her as she sat out on a newly hung porch swing. She wrinkled her nose at him in protest, and he grinned. "And… You're making doors again."

She froze, panic gripping her. 

"It's alright, I'm not mad. I'm just - just be careful. I trust you, but I know that before -" 

"I made a mistake. I know it, you know it, the Coven knows it, and so does everyone else in the Heights that saw me fall from grace." Emma curled her arms around her knees, bitterly forcing out words. "I won't make the same mistake again. I am on the straight and narrow; these doors are for commuting and hunting skips only." 

David laughed, poking her in the side. "Back to hunting skips, huh? Damn. Don't you ever settle down and enjoy the simple life?" 

Emma laughed, shaking her head. "What the hell is the simple life? Nothing is simple."

"Well, yeah, but… I mean the simple life." He brushed a hand through his hair, looking at her with a gentleness that she instantly felt uneasy with. "House, a pet maybe, hobbies, a partner, kids -" 

"If you are trying to set me up again -" 

"Not me," David raised his hands defensively. "No, I was just -" 

"I don't deserve that life," Emma stated, shrugging. The sun was sinking lower, crickets singing in the cool air. "That life isn't for me. That life is for people like you and Snow, people that are worth something."

"Oh, Emma. You know that's not -" 

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" Emma snapped, standing with a start. David looked at her with a hurt expression, and she felt pure rage. "Goodnight."

She stepped back into the house, letting the screen door slam shut behind her. 

"Emma, come on," David called from the porch, but Emma wasn't listening to him as she fought the immediate urge to be ill. The sudden nausea ripped through her, and despite her attempts, vomit burst from her throat. 

She panted, holding on to the wall with one hand. The other hand gripped her side, fierce cramping making her double over in a scream of agony. She lurched forward, unable to breathe as pressure rose in her stomach. To her terror, her skin grew taut and she seemed to bloat, the pain of it ripping through her. 

David splintered the door, his arms around her as she lost consciousness. 

She woke in an ambulance, David holding her hand like he'd done when they were children. He was always the best big brother she could have asked for, always protective of her, and always pushing her to be better. He had convinced her to trust Ruth, convinced her to take a chance with the older woman who was willing to adopt both of them, and they had found another home together. When she was scared or sick, he was right there to hold her hand. Even now as pain ripped through her, he was there. She tried to understand, but her body burned until the flame became too much to bear. 

She woke again to the beeping of machines and David's yelling, her body aching but no longer in the same searing pain. Lifting herself up to try and hear what David was saying, she struggled to make out more than just fragments. 

"I'm not leaving, that's my sister ---- How did -- she wasn't, she --- I don't know, she never said anything ----- A WHAT? No! I'm --- not leaving!" 

Emma's stomach lurched, and she shifted to get out of bed. The sheets slid from her middle, and she gasped. Her middle was rounded, as if she was pregnant. But that was impossible, that was absolutely and completely impossible. 

A knock sounded, a petite woman entering. 

"I'm Doctor Mullins, Emma. I know that this may take some time to fully process, but… you're pregnant."

Emma hissed out a breath into a hysterical laugh. "What? No. No. This is not how babies work, or pregnancy, or even - I haven't even had sex since - "

"I know, and I understand that you must be frightened." The doctor attempted to console her, but Emma could not stop her rising panic. She touched the rounded skin of her stomach, the firm smoothness lined with stretch marks. Letting out a low wail, the doctor tried to speak over her still. "It's some ancient and dark magic, but it's very real. We have an inspector on the way to take your statement, and we performed a few tests -" 

"No. No, this is a bad dream, this isn't real, this isn't happening to me!" Emma closed her eyes, trying to focus. 

" - most concerning of which is the results on paternity, which indicate that the father has non-human presenting DNA. Normally that's not terribly unusual, but this is clearly not a planned pregnancy considering your… your conception being, well, this, and the genomic markers show that the parentage is half Celestial. I need to ask, have you had any relationships with an Angel?"

Emma shook her head, trying to understand what the doctor was asking. 

"Alright, what about anyone with proximity to dark, Arcane, or Demonic magics? Anyone who associates with Demons? Do you associate with them?" The doctor eyed her curiously, and Emma shook her head again. 

"I don't know any Demons, Angels, or Celestials." Emma bit her lip, frustrated at the question. Rolling it between her teeth, she murmured a thought out loud. "I did recently perform a ritual that was older. It didn't call for this though, I don't know anything about this…" 

"Well, it doesn't just happen." Emma looked at the doctor with enough venom in her stare to curdle milk. The doctor laughed nervously. "I mean, it did but -" 

"This cannot be happening," Emma moaned, throwing her head back against the hospital bed's pillow. "This has to be a bad dream."

"I'm afraid it is all very real. Considering the circumstances, an inspector of magical law will be assigned to question you regarding the situation. Because of the issues of legality, you may not leave or have visitors until then." The doctor stood, brushing her hands on her slacks. "Baby looks healthy despite wanting to grow at an accelerated rate, and we have slowed that as much as we can. Welcome to motherhood Miss Swan, and, er… Congratulations." Giving a last placid smile, she left the room, leaving Emma alone. 

Emma sat stunned, unable to do anything but focus on her steady breathing. 

(Fuck)

The single word came to mind again and again, escaping from her lips as her breath finally began to turn into sobs. 

"Fuck."

[thisismyfookinmusicthingo]

this was meant to be an epic kpop female vocalist list but it ended up being a mamamoo fan post

MAMAMOO SONGS THAT I VIBE TO NO MATTER WHAT:

Egotistic: https://open.spotify.com/track/5Z4aqpT39KpY8gbHoJWdou?si=VAXJqdihQY6RfR89Tp8TAQ  HIP: https://open.spotify.com/track/24nK8tW7Pt3Inh2utttuoG?si=_pJP5HbHQtKxJz4m_GgvCQ                                                          Wind Flower: https://open.spotify.com/track/2qwyjoSsSr3M7HTt611Q5O?si=omRr3TISQuyrjM6qnQ8EKw  Chuck: https://open.spotify.com/track/4LfmJgyInGg96Kaue1ceGZ?si=rZV5IwqAQFaFWt5XcTpUxA  AYA: https://open.spotify.com/track/4BZXVFYCb76Q0Klojq4piV?si=HclT8324TWajq_gF6oNGRg   Dingga: https://open.spotify.com/track/0bDYceyQd1jnJO4sK47YxU?si=9YzPYydrQe2rWn8h5k1vtw                                                        WANNA BE MYSELF: https://open.spotify.com/track/0VPBuXtEG16NtN5ZGYJ7lV?si=4ZACFHehSAaM1noAqqnHpg  Gleam: https://open.spotify.com/track/4dOrfL6qgxnjCMSmkekFhB?si=yKWQAj4HTdSdXjWhL9Tlyg

I ALSO VIBE TO THESE BECAUSE THEY’RE FUN:

Taller than you: https://open.spotify.com/track/05d6pLPZ1DmRfgc5IfdPnx?si=DkKjL_GGRZis2Z1HIeXedg

Mr. Ambiguous: https://open.spotify.com/track/0j5vNjUquRktzFqZexjADt?si=6xzQtYR2SAi5aI0gug3Asw

Yes I am:https://open.spotify.com/track/6DhY27Goy0fUFbySD3ulGn?si=Xzl5gyI6Qveiu6vHoB7l2A

It’s so hard not to put all of their songs on this list.

SOLO SONGS:

Hwasa - Maria: https://open.spotify.com/track/0ZeGfEAL5Rl4pd5LZBGuEK?si=_s5YOLkOTsm1_eDGE1AkMg (yes this is the tiktok song)

Hwasa - Twit: https://open.spotify.com/track/6qyz1KOlGJsKYJ4ZsRmRSD?si=20SESzThSASP723PEY2Zyw (this song makes me hate men 🤡)

Hwasa - LMM: https://open.spotify.com/track/61RWlWnaIKrOBnmjdQgFOH?si=WmV3fZP6RHqVKKQqZeN59Q (i cried to this when i first listened to it)

Wheein - Easy: https://open.spotify.com/track/35Bon0pO4syTi6Hfsr2Kk8?si=MMzFX2X0RrWA-MfZoJl6vA (i love her so much why can’t she just lend me her voice for five minutes?????)

Solar - Spit it Out:https://open.spotify.com/track/5F6RrFgt1yvRhNCdAEumM6?si=v1lfO8NyQjeuk9tF6z1Ywg (FUCKIN PREACH SIS)

Moonbyul - Eclipse: https://open.spotify.com/track/07H4GUtSu2IWIgrpC99zJf?si=nHMN3I1jSYezWTq0EwGvbQ (not really my fav kind of style but SHE DOES IT SO WELL)

I AM NOW OBLIGATED TO LINK PERFORMANCES:  

MAMA 2020 - AYA + Dingga (Agrabah Ver.): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC2oD0d8hJQ (They hyped the performance up a lot considering there was no audience due to corona) 

MAMA 2019 - HIP REMIX ver.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MovSoqLBdHY (I remember watching the livestream for this online and for every single group that performed, the backing vocals were way too loud. I think it worked in Mamamoo’s favor because it was their first time doing such a big performance with a full dance with headset mics. They did a good job, especially since the headset mics they used are known for never staying in place.

Would like to also point out that for the red carpet livestream before the show started the two members with dyed hair having natural hair. Also during the show Hwasa opened for Dua Lipa’s performance with black hair, meaning that they dyed their hair backstage during the performances before theirs. I can also confirm that they didn’t use wigs, because if they did, I would have 100% seen. This proves how much effort Korean entertainment companies are willing to put into their groups.)

MAMA 2018 Performance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUn5QOZF7A8 (This is probably one of the reasons Mamamoo is known as a controversial group. They don’t like to listen to what society thinks of them, and this performance shows it. Their passion and confidence is contagious.   

Sadly Moonbyul’s performance was cut out of this clip, because her featured artist got involved in a scandal, however you can still find it online.) 

I should wrap this up here before I get too carried away, although I feel like I already have.

This was meant to be short. Oh my.

If you got this far, have a gold star! ⭐

stan mamamoo or else