#writing established relationships is challenging when it's long form

[mariasont]

Ideas From a Book - A.H

a/n: im writing what i want !!!!!!!!!!!!! i have a gun kink SUE ME !!! if you don't like it don't read it !!!!!!!

anyhow HAPPY READING

masterlist

₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧

pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

summary: in which hotch comes home to find you reading and finds out you have a gun kink

warnings: 18+ MDNI, a lot going on here yall idk, gun going in ur vag, reader loves smut she's just like me fr, gun kink!, dirty talk, established relationship, yada yada

wc: 2.3k

When Hotch returned home from work, the ritual he had was comforting in its predictability: shedding his coat and shoes, setting down his briefcase, and locking up his gun. Then, he'd find you, as he always did, nestled into the couch, book in hand. 

It was something he could count on, as reliable as the sun rising in the morning. Your bookshelf was a spectrum of genres--science fiction, poetry, mystery, historical, fantasy--name it, you've likely read it. Among these, he had noticed a trend--your favoritism for romance. It was fitting, as you've always been an ardent believer in fairytales and happy endings. It was a belief he intended to uphold, a fairytale ending he was set on creating for you. 

The book you held today had a cover he didn't recognize. He cleared his throat, announcing his arrival. Your eyes met his in an instant, and he was struck anew by just how pretty you are. Effortlessly so. He told you as much, though you seldom accepted the compliment. 

"Hi, handsome," you said, infusing your words with honey as you folded the corner of your page and laid the book aside. Spencer would scold you for that. "How was work?"

A shrug rolled off his shoulders, fingers working to loosen the tie that felt like a noose after a long day. Stepping further into the living room, he sighed, "Heavy with paperwork."

"That's no fun," you said, lips curving into a delicate pout. 

It was an invitation he couldn't ignore. Leaning in, his hands found your face, and as your lips met, you giggled, pulling back just enough to study his face, the harsh lines under his eyes, reading the fatigue on his features like a well-thumbed novel. 

"What are you reading?" he questioned, easing down next to you, the couch dipping to his weight. 

You dodged his eyes, fingers absently fidgeting with your earlobe as you gave him a half-smile, tilting the book just enough so he couldn't catch the title.  

"Just some romance book," you admitted, with a slight uptick in your voice. "Garcia recommended it."

He regarded you with a contemplative frown. Normally, a book you would have gone on for hours, detailing every character, plot twist, and subplot, dissecting its layers and intricacies in exhaustive detail. 

Aaron watched as you placed the book on the side table, movements deliberate. You positioned yourself across his lip, a seemingly innocent distraction. It almost worked. Your soft thighs sinking into his calloused hands, as if they were crafted just for him. He recognized your ploy, though, giving your leg a squeeze a little tighter than necessary. 

You leaned in, your breath tinged with the minty traces of your afternoon tea, a detail as intimate as any secret shared between lovers. He nipped at your lip, a gentle diversion, as his hand crept towards the book.

You wriggled in his hold, vying to get there first, but he was faster. Much faster at that, although you loved to challenge him on that. He secretly loved when you did. He loved you. 

"What are you doing?" Your voice was rising in a panicked pitch. You stretched your hand out, trying to reclaim it, but he kept it just beyond reach.

Aaron's arm formed a band around you, effectively pinning your arms to your torso while you writhed within his grasp. A groan was stifled in his throat. "Quit that."

You smiled, a hint of tease in the curve of your lips and stilled. You were acutely aware of the effect you had on him, and it was a feat achieved with little effort. 

"Why are you being so secretive about this?"

He nodded to the book. The cover was unassuming, black with a smattering of designs that sprawled across it. It looked like any other book you read.

"I'm not being secretive," you insisted, deliberately avoiding his probing gaze. "You're just being nosy."

"Oh, am I?" He couldn't help but laugh, nose crinkling as he dismissed the notion with a shake of his head.

You nodded, not saying anything in response. He thumbed through the book, opening it to a random page.

"Wait--," you pleaded, but his attention was already glued to the ink. You wrapped yourself around him, your face buried in the folds of his crisp dress shirt as you murmured into the fabric, "please don't."

His arm shifted from your waist to cradle the back of your neck. "Gasping at the cool metal of the gun running across my belly, I want him press it into my panties."

Your breath caught, warmth flooding your cheeks as you pressed your face deeper into his chest. "Aaron, stop."

But he didn't, of course, he was far too intrigued.

"Parting my legs, I roll into the metal. He runs it back and forth across my pussy, wetting it against the barrel to my entrance," He continued, wetting the pad of his thumb as he turned the page, eyes meeting yours. 

He cocked an eyebrow as if waiting for your response. You didn't give him one, huffing a sigh as you plucked the book from his hands and flung it onto the cushions of the couch.

"Are you...into this?" He articulated each word with deliberate slowness, as if navigating a minefield. "This is a little intense."

You groan, tucking your chin down to your chest as you fought against the tingling sensation clawing up your spine.

"I don't know." The words tumbled out in a murmur, a feeble shield against the embarrassment flooding your senses.

It was the truth. You didn't know. Ink on a page was a far cry from reality. Nonetheless, your recent daydreams were filled with images of Aaron with his gun. God, forbid you see him on duty.

He shifted you off his lap, and you felt the corners of your mouth turn downward involuntarily. You watched his retreating figure vanish down the hall, your thoughts racing at breakneck speed, gripped by the fear that you had scared him off, that this was his tipping point.

The welling tears were poised to fall, but they paused as he came back into view. Holding his gun.

Your breath halted, a knot forming in your throat as you clumsily rose to your knees on the couch, your eyes wide and transfixed on him.

You watched, more like ogled, as he methodically removed the magazine, opening the action and ejecting the cartridges of the gun, putting the safety into place. Your throat felt dry. His advance towards you was predatory, a slow march that rekindled a well-known flutter in your stomach.

"Aaron?"

He stepped in front of you, the firearm dangling loosely at his side. You gazed up at him, peering through the shelter of your lashes.

"Do you want me to fuck you with this?"

You knew you said you didn't know if this was something you were into, yet here you were, retracting every syllable. Suddenly so incredibly turned on it almost hurt.

You nodded vigorously, your enthusiasm outpacing your self-awareness.

The look he gave you was one you recognized instantly, eliciting yet another soft pout before you gave in. "Yes, please, Aaron."

"Good girl," he said, making your heart skip a beat as he pressed the nose of the gun into your chest, forcing you backward. "Always so good for me."

You nodded again, even though there was no need to, but you weren't really focused on his words. You were focused on the gun pressing into your body, imagining it pressed against your clit, up your pussy.

"You're sure, um," you managed, trying to catch your breath, pausing in the middle of your sentence to clear your throat, "that all the safety stuff is on?"

You sounded dumb, you were aware, but all intellectual thoughts were out the window.

He let out a deep chuckle, the sound sending another wave of desire straight to your core. "Yes, baby, all of the safety stuff is on."

"Okay, good."

He pressed his lips to yours, the gun still flush against your chest, now grazing your nipple as you arched into him.

He pulled back only enough to speak into your mouth. "What's your safe word?"

"Mercy."

He hummed in response, fingers threading through your hair as he pushed the barrel of the gun down your stomach. You froze, a subtle gap forming between your lips as your eyes remained locked on the motion.

He brought his mouth to your ear, nipping at the skin lightly as he pushed the metal further down your body, lifting the hem of your shirt with it. You gasped at the feeling, pulling your bottom lip through your teeth as you tried to hide just how affected you were.

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes." It was immediate. Without hesitation.

He kissed your lips, gentle and unhurried, as if he was savoring the sensation, like he thought I might crumble under too much pressure. He might be right.

"Take these off."

His gun pressed against the waistband of your shorts. You didn't waste a second, lifting your hips and shimmying out of the fabric. A sound of approval vibrated from his throat, his fingers entwining in your hair, gently drawing your face closer to his.

"Are you sure about this?"

A nod came naturally, followed by a yes breathed out like a prayer, as your eyes trailed down to in between your thighs where the gun was now sitting. 

"Aaron, I need it."

"Oh, you need it, huh?" He tsked his tongue, running the nose of the gun over your clothed heat. "I can tell."

You let out a sharp gasp, bucking your hips into the device as you met his eyes, willing him to keep going. You had never been more turned on in your life. His hand moved from your neck to the small of your waist, pinning you in place. With one hand. Fuck.

He laid the gun beside your hip on the couch in order to pull your panties off. You squirmed at the rush of cold air encompassing between your thighs. His eyes were glued to your pussy, tongue darting out to swipe across his lips.

"Christ sweetheart," he hissed, sliding one finger through your slit, showing you the moisture you had produced. "Needy girl."

"Aaron, please." You needed something inside of you.

He laughed, at your expense, but you didn't care, concentrated on his hand grabbing the Glock and repeating the action his finger just did.

You choked out a sound, stuttering against the touch. He in a merciful mood apparently, pushing the gun slowly into your sopping cunt. You were writhing against it, your mouth parted as you tried to get used to the foreign object.

"You okay?" He asked, pausing his motions, giving you a second to adjust.

You swallowed; gaze drawn down to where he was sliding the gun into you. You bit down on your lip hard enough to draw blood.

"Yes."

"You can take it," he said, but the way the firearm was stretching you made you unsure.

It wasn't the size necessarily, but the way the groves and magazine were cramming into you was making hold your breath, which him being him he noticed immediately.

His hand rested gently against the pouch of your stomach. "Breathe."

The pent-up breath escaped your lips, and he rewarded you by sinking the gun further into your pussy. You fingers wrapped around his biceps, the tips digging slightly into the constellation of freckled skin.

One final thrust and it was fully in you. You could feel every groove and contour of it, cunt clenching and unclenching at the sensation. 

"Look at you," he drawled, beginning to fuck you with it. It transcended the prose of any book, a sensation that no array of printed words could fully capture. "You like that?"

Nodding was your only recourse, mouth hanging pathetically open as you moaned and whined. You were in a daze-like state, every sound and motion involuntary.

"This is the Glock 17," he explained, thrusting the gun faster, causing you to tighten your hands around his neck, bringing him so close his words were melting into your skin. "It feeds from a staggered-column magazine that has a 17-round capacity. It sends 115 gr bullets downrange at about 1200 feet per second."

You could feel your arousal leaking to your thighs, coating his forearm in the process, but that would never stop him.

"This gun has taken the lives of nineteen unsubs."

You know this should make you coil away, that it should feel wrong somehow, but all you felt was that growing tightness in your core, your legs shaking, your chest rising and falling at a more rapid pace.

"You don't even care, do you? All you care about is getting yourself off." His chuckles wove through his words, and his motions didn't falter, intent of ushering you to your peak. "My dirty girl."

You were so close, the edges of the gun managing to hit every spot just right.

"Come on, honey."

Fuck. You let out another strangled gasp, way louder than intended as your back arched like a string of a bow, and then suddenly you released.

A prism of colors exploded behind your squeezed eyes. A collage of musical notes falling over your ears. Your whole body was being ignited as you gushed around the gun.

"Christ." His new favorite word as of late. He withdrew the weapon from you.

You let out a subdued hum, propping yourself on your elbows, your eyes lazily rising to meet his with a tender flutter.

"You're so pretty," he murmured, the compliment settling on you like dew on morning flowers. Your gaze caught the gun, now bathed in a liquid gloss, cradled in his hands.

"Oh my god," you said, hand covering your mouth.

He laughed softly, placing it on the coffee table before his lips brushed against yours, a soft and measured caress that belied his previous urgency.

"You might need a new one," you said sheepishly, heat creeping into your ears as he pressed another soft kiss to your cheek.

"Absolutely not," he murmured into your flushed skin. "It just became my gun of choice."

You were going to give him the best head of his life.

taglist: @hotchhner @khxna

[kleopatra45]

Sun in the Houses [Solar Return]

In astrology, the Solar Return chart is a powerful tool used to predict the themes and events for the upcoming year. The Solar Return chart is cast for the exact moment when the Sun returns to its natal position each year. The house in which the Sun falls in the Solar Return chart is particularly significant, as it highlights the main focus and areas of emphasis for the year.

Sun in the 1st House

When the Sun is in the 1st house of the Solar Return chart, the focus for the year is on self-expression, personal development, and identity. This can be a year of significant personal growth, new beginnings, and increased confidence. You may feel more assertive and eager to take on new challenges.

Sun in the 2nd House

With the Sun in the 2nd house, the emphasis is on finances, values, and personal resources. This year may bring opportunities to improve your financial situation, increase your income, or make important purchases. It's also a time to assess your values and what you truly consider important.

Sun in the 3rd House

The Sun in the 3rd house highlights communication, learning, and local community. This can be a busy year filled with social interactions, short trips, and intellectual pursuits. You may find yourself more involved in writing, teaching, or engaging in various forms of communication.

Sun in the 4th House

When the Sun is in the 4th house, the focus shifts to home, family, and personal foundations. This year may bring changes or developments in your home environment or family dynamics. It’s a good time to focus on your roots, secure your base, and nurture your emotional well-being.

Sun in the 5th House

With the Sun in the 5th house, the year is marked by creativity, romance, and personal enjoyment. This is a time to express yourself through creative activities, enjoy hobbies, and indulge in leisure pursuits. Romantic relationships and interactions with children may also be highlighted.

Sun in the 6th House

The Sun in the 6th house emphasizes work, health, and daily routines. This year you may find yourself more focused on your job, improving your health, and organizing your daily life. It's a good time to establish healthier habits and streamline your work processes.

Sun in the 7th House

When the Sun is in the 7th house, partnerships and relationships are at the forefront. This year may bring significant developments in your personal or business relationships. You may form new partnerships, strengthen existing ones, or experience important changes in your interpersonal dynamics.

Sun in the 8th House

The Sun in the 8th house brings focus to transformation, shared resources, and deeper psychological issues. This can be a year of profound change, where you confront and release old patterns. Financial matters involving shared resources or investments may also be significant.

Sun in the 9th House

With the Sun in the 9th house, the emphasis is on expansion, higher learning, and exploration. This year may bring opportunities for travel, pursuing higher education, or exploring new philosophies and belief systems. It's a time to broaden your horizons and seek new experiences.

Sun in the 10th House

The Sun in the 10th house highlights career, public image, and personal achievements. This can be a year of professional advancement, recognition, and increased responsibilities. You may set ambitious goals and work hard to achieve them, gaining visibility and respect in your field.

Sun in the 11th House

When the Sun is in the 11th house, the focus is on friendships, social networks, and long-term goals. This year you may become more involved in group activities, organizations, or causes that are important to you. It's a good time to network, collaborate, and pursue your aspirations.

Sun in the 12th House

With the Sun in the 12th house, the emphasis is on introspection, spirituality, and retreat. This can be a year of inner growth, healing, and releasing what no longer serves you. You may feel drawn to solitude, meditation, or exploring the subconscious mind. It's a time for reflection and preparing for new beginnings.

©️kleopatra45

[novlr]

how do i write an established married couple that are out of their honeymoon phase and now theyre just cute and comfy w/ eachother??

Established relationships, in particular, require careful consideration and development to make them feel authentic and relatable to your readers. An established relationship is one that has a history of shared experiences and a level of comfort and familiarity between the characters and can take many forms, such as long-term friendships, romantic partnerships, or even familial bonds. Writing established relationships requires a deep understanding of the characters’ backstories, the dynamics of their relationship, and how their connection influences their individual arcs.

Understand the dynamics of established relationships

Established relationships have a history and shared experiences that shape their current state.

Power dynamics, roles, and expectations within the relationship have been formed over time.

Established relationships involve a level of comfort, familiarity, and trust between the characters.

Conflicts and challenges in established relationships may be more complex and deeply rooted.

Characters in established relationships have a deeper understanding of each other’s strengths, weaknesses, and quirks.

Established relationships involve a sense of commitment, loyalty, or even obligation.

Develop their backstory

How and when did the characters first meet, and what were their initial impressions?

What significant events or experiences have the characters shared that have shaped their relationship?

How has the relationship evolved over time, and what challenges or conflicts have they faced together?

What are some of the defining moments or turning points in their relationship?

How has the way the characters have grown and changed as individuals affected their relationship?

What are some of the inside jokes, shared references, or traditions that are unique to their relationship?

Show the depth of their connection

Use dialogue to reveal the characters’ familiarity, comfort, and understanding of each other.

Show the characters engaging in shared activities or rituals that demonstrate their bond.

Describe the characters’ nonverbal communication, like knowing glances or subtle gestures.

Reveal the characters’ ability to anticipate each other’s needs, thoughts, or reactions.

Show the characters supporting, comforting, or challenging each other in meaningful ways.

Demonstrate the characters’ willingness to make sacrifices or compromises for the sake of their relationship.

Explore conflicts and challenges

Identify the underlying tensions, differences, or unresolved issues in the relationship.

Show how the characters navigate and cope with these challenges, both individually and as a pair.

Explore how external factors, such as family, work, or personal goals, can strain the relationship.

Demonstrate how the characters’ individual flaws or weaknesses can affect the relationship.

Show the characters working through conflicts, compromising, or finding solutions together.

Illustrate how the challenges and conflicts ultimately strengthen or change the relationship.

Develop character arcs

Show how the relationship influences each character’s personal growth, decisions, and actions.

Explore how the characters’ individual journeys affect the dynamics of the relationship.

Show how the characters learn from each other and inspire growth or change.

Show how the relationship evolves because of the characters’ individual development.

Illustrate how the characters’ shared experiences and challenges shape their shared future.

Reveal how the relationship ultimately supports or hinders the characters’ individual goals and desires.

Craft authentic dialogue and interactions

Use inside jokes, nicknames, or references that are specific to the relationship.

Show the characters finishing each other’s sentences or thoughts, demonstrating their deep understanding of the other.

Use subtext and implication in dialogue to reveal the characters’ unspoken feelings or concerns.

Demonstrate the characters’ ability to communicate effectively, even during conflicts or disagreements.

Show the characters engaging in playful banter or teasing that reflect their comfort with each other.

Illustrate the characters’ ability to have meaningful, vulnerable conversations that deepen their connection.

[fallingdownhell]

Hello!

Could I request headcanons of Diluc, Xiao Zhongli, and Ayato with a demonic water dragon s/o?

Her dragon form is huge, with a serpent-like body, covered in scales blacker than the night, has 2 pairs of horns (the top pair curve upward and the bottom pair curve downward), sharp fangs and claws.

I'm gonna be honest, I have never written anything like this. It's new, but I like to challenge myself, so thank you. Hope I could satisfy you with the way I went about it.

Characters Included: Diluc; Xiao; Zhongli; Ayato

Content: gender neutral reader; shapeshifting; established relationship (Diluc; Ayato); getting together (Xiao; Zhongli);

Word count: 2,5k words

Hope you like it and sorry it took me so long to write.

Diluc

he would be absolutely clueless

he thinks you're a normal human just like him, only that you are a little obsessed with water and always want to be close to a big body of water

It's a good thing that Dawn Winery is so close to a huge lake

he always knows he can find you there, sitting by the shore if he can't find you anywhere else in the mansion

today however, something was not right when he went looking for you down at the shore

he saw you sitting there, feet in the cold water of the lake, nothing unusual about that

but... was there something laying behind you? Why was is swinging side to side from time to time? And why did your head look kinda weird, too?

Diluc didn't know what to think or expect, but he went closer to you nonetheless, not wanting to assume

When he did get closer, he noticed that those things seemed to be attached to you

As he was pracitcally behind you now, he finally made his presence known and you immediately jumped up, scared out of your mind since you didn't notice anyone approaching you. You even let out a deep, warning growl until you realized that it was Diluc

You started to relax a bit, but as you saw how he was looking at you, you realized that you forgot about something very important

Before you could run away - which you were definitely trying to do just now - Diluc grabbed you by the wrist, silently begging you to stay

You reluctantly do so, expecting to be bombarded with questions, which... never came?

He was just standing there, taking in your half-transformed state and with each passing second, you grew more and more restless

Soon enough, the questions started to come, but instead of being all over the place, he seemed to keep his cool, asking you one thing after the other

He even asked to see your other form, but you declined that, not wanting to shock him any more than you already have. He accepts that, but deep down, he really does want to see it

Surprisingly to you, he doesn't seem too put off about that reveal. Sure he has to get used to the fact that you are... dragon? Half-dragon? Diluc isn't too sure, but he doesn't mind

After all, this detail didn't change anything about the feelings you both had for the other. So why would he change his views of you? It was just another aspect of you and he could understand why you kept that hidden from him

Not many people would react to such a revelation the way he had reacted

Does ask to see your full form from time to time, but never pressuring you. He's just really interested, he was fascinated by the color of your scales at that time already, he couldn't imagine what it would look like when your entire body was covered in them

When you finally agree, he is mesmerized by your sheer size and the colours, absolutely can NOT take his eyes off of you

Swears to protect your secret and falls even more in love with you when he learns that you can also transform into a half-half form

Overall a pretty positive reaction from him, which you would have never thought would happen, but you sure as hell aren't complaining about it

Xiao

Immediatley knows.. upon your first meeting he just knows that something is up with you

you are no adeptus, but you aren't a human being either

yet he can't seem to figure it out, either, and that bothers him

he is supposed to protect this land, yet how can he do that when he can't even pick out what exactly you are

would keep taps on you and your activities, trying to determine wether or not you would become a threat he has to exterminate

he follows you around for quite some time. In fact, it almost becomes a routine for him and he doesn't realize it but at some point, he also knows your usual schedule by heart

why does he want to smile whenever he sees you interact with the children of Liyue Harbor? What is this warm feeling inside his chest?

Panics when he realizes this and tries to keep his distance from now on, but he quickly learns that he can't seem to stay away from you for too long

there's just something about you that keeps pulling him in, wether he wants to or not... and he also still has to make sure you're not a threat.. at least, that's what he tells himself

if he were to be honest, deep down, he was already convinced that you're not dangerous, but he needs and excuse to come and see you

that is, until one fateful day

he was fighting against some demonic creatures at Yaoguang Shoal. There were many of them and they kept coming, his karmic debt starting to wear him down as well

he was threatening to be overpowered, not being able to control the pain any longer since he had been fighting for quite some time already, when a huge shadow appeared out of nowhere

as he saw this huge dragon form approaching, he mentally prepared himself for a fight, but also for the possibilty of his death... when suddenly, against his expectations, the dragon attacked the demonic creatures instead of him

stunned for a second, Xiao quickly recovered and joined the fight again, this time at the side of this unexpected ally

with the help, it was over pretty quickly, but Xiao kept his guard up, not being able to predict what would happen next

then, the form of the dragon started to glow, then began to shrink until it was as small as a human. The glow kept fading and then the next moment, he was facing you

Xiao was confused, the emotions for once being obviously displayed on his face as he looked at you, connecting the dots in his head

"There, now you finally know. Can you stop stalking me now?"

You said this, with a teasing smile on your lips, indicating that you were aware of him all along, but seemingly not minding it that much.

On the other hand, Xiao was mortified. Without any reply, he teleported back to Wangshuu Inn, where he tried to process what had just happened

He kept to himself for a few days, and probably would have done so for longer, if it wasn't for you, seeking him out to talk to him about all the things that had happened

from this point on would be where your relationship started to bloom, Xiao slowly coming to terms with his feelings for you

he is not bothered by your upbringing at all. In fact, this meant that you were "blessed" with a long life just like him, so he wouldn't have to fear losing you far too soon again

sure, he still has to get used to it, but he is fascinated more than anything else. Constantly asks you questions, wanting to learn all there is about you

would care deeply for you, and depending on your believes, would keep it a secret from others if you were to ask this of him

Zhongli

just like Xiao, he also knows immediately that something is up with you

but unlike the adeptus that watches over Liyue, Zhongli figures it out on his own rather quickly

after all, he spent many years as a dragon himself, so of course he would recognise someone of that species

but it still gets him thinking... because, dragons don't exist that largly anymore, especially not the ones with the ability to shapeshift

he really wants to approach you and talk to you about this topic, but he also knows that he can't, as it would probably come across as creepy, especially if he were to bring something like that up in broad daylight with people surrounding you all

so, instead, he invites you out for a day. You spend the entire afternoon and evening together, ending the little get-together with a walk around the almost abandoned harbor at night

This is when Zhongli decides to bring this topic up, having felt the urge to ask you throughout the entire day

when he does, your eyes widen, not having expected anyone to ever get behind your little secret. You were scared.. scared of what he might do to you and him telling everyone else

Zhongli on the other hand, only now realized why you were looking so scared. He wanted to assure you that he would not tell anyone, but he also knew that you were not likely to believe him at all. He had to prove himself somehow..

and the only way he could think of would be to reveal his true identity to you, as well

at first, you obviously don't believe him, because... who would? A random person, claiming to be the God of Contracts, watching over the entire nation of Liyue? Yeah, as if.

But then, you have no choice but to believe him when he transforms into a half human, half dragon state infront of your very eyes

you suddenly feel extremely connected to him and instead of saying anything, simply follow his example, revealing half of your dragon form to him

Zhongli is mesmerized by the beauty the colour of your scales take. He wants nothing more than to trace along them with his fingers, the urge almost too strong to resist, but he does

you two begin to bond over that shared experience, your connection growing stronger and stronger with each passing day

your identites are a secret to everyone except you two, which only helps in strengthening that shared bond

it's hard to say who falls in love first, but it's not like that matters. It happened and that's the only important thing, since it led to the most fulfilling and loved relationship you ever had

Zhongli was enamoured with you, willing to do anything for you. Plus, he was an expert at keeping things hidden from other people, so you would never have to worry about people finding out about you. At least if you don't want that to happen

Either way, Zhongli swore to always stay by your side and protect you, and he plans on keeping this promise....always

Ayato

he would be just as clueless as Diluc

sure, he and his people did make a background-check on you before Ayato started to pursue you romantically, but that didn't bring anything unusual to light

nowadays, you and Ayato were engaged, with you already living with him at the Kamisato estate

he loved the open affinity you displayed towards water. He could often find you sitting outside, looking out towards the sea, lost in your own thoughts

you never seemed to care about the weather. More often than once had he found you sitting outside at night, the cold not seeming to bother you at all

At times like these, he would go grab a blanket before he sat down behind you, wrapping you two into the warmth of the fabric as you lean back against his chest, still looking towards the ocean

you also once told him that you adored the fact he had been blessed with a hydro vision. According to you, it made him smell like the ocean you so adored, his touch cool and calming on your skin

at first, he was a bit taken aback by the statement, but once he thought about it, he couldn't help but seeing it as a compliment towards him

at some point, the guilt starts to build up inside you, feeling bad that you hide such an important thing about yourself

you feel like he should know before you guys get married, since it might change his view on you. And what if he someday finds out by accident and then accuses you of lying to him?

No, you definitely don't want that to happen, so you decide to tell him

You write Ayato a little note, telling him to meet you down at the beach where you two can talk in private

he is a bit concerned at this, trying to think if he did something wrong or if he might have upset you in any way

instead of meeting you after his work, he decides to abandon it alltogether, making his way to you immediately

you're a bit surprised to see him this early, but you also welcome it. This way, you don't have time to overthink things and just tell him

When you tell him that you want to share a secret with him, Ayato is perplexed at first. He thought that there was nothing kept hidden between the two of you, but he also didn't want to judge just based on this statement

so, he tried to keep an open mind and signaled for you to tell him. When you did, it was obvious he didn't believe you. He didn't need to say anything, his eyes were telling it all

so, with a deep breath in, you started to transform entirely, your form growing huge, scales as dark as the night decorating your entire body, until Ayato was a mere peck of dust next to you

He watched all of this happen, equally terrified as well as fascinated. He honest to god thought you were joking, that this was one of those pranks people like to play on their significant others

you, after having proven your point, transformed back, now looking unsure, not knowing what to expect of his reaction

he, in the most diplomatic tone ever, told you that he would need some time to think, which you nodded, understanding that request fully

so, you waited. And those days were the absolute horror for you. Luckily, it didn't seem like Ayato told anyone, the people of the estate still talking to you and treating you like they usually did

but you haven't seen or heard anything from Ayato at all

the first time he comes to you again is after five days. And what he does confuses you even more. He just comes up to you, kissing you on the cheek and greeting you good morning like nothing had happened

before you have the chance to ask him about it, he is gone again, so you wait until you catch him in a quiet moment

And when you ask him about it, he just shrugs his shoulders. "Well, you're still you. That fact doesn't change anything. You're still my spouse and I still love you."

You're beyond relieved that he's not bothered by it, having expected the worst already

Ayato on the other hand, doesn't want to admit it, but that little revelation made him even more whipped for you than he already was

But that's something that you don't have to know about...

[night-raven-tattler]

Hello Mx Tattly! I really enjoyed your ideal types post involving Heartslabyul characters. I like the idea of Riddle liking his significant other being someone earning his respect. So in this request, if they are open, of Riddle having a Yuu!Female reader s/o that is naturally gifted prodigy in fencing & swordsmanship, making her a bold, fiercely talented swordswoman who usually wields double swords (but is just as well with one). Both mostly got closer after his overblot since she was involved in defending him (somehow).

Just headcanons of Riddle having a s/o that is physically stronger than him (and affectionate when just the two of them since she also isn’t much of a pda person)

Extra: After getting to know a bit more of Diasomnia, she also manages to go under Lilia’s training after finding out he trains Sebek and Silver because she wants to continue sharpening her skills and seeing any form of improvement.

(She’s originally an OC of mine but idk if you take OC requests and didn’t wanna assume, so 😭)

Anyway thank you! I’m sorry if I wrote a lot.. 😭

Hello anon! Mx Tattly appreciates your kind words! Currently they don't do OC requests, however she might consider answering such requests in the future. He is sorry if the writing is not what you envisioned, especially since she didn't include Riddle being "protected" per se by the reader character, as they considered their narrative choice is one Riddle would appreciate more. He is also grateful for the brainrot you caused, as they are an enjoyer of sword weilding characters themselves. Hopefully you can still enjoy!

A knight fit for a queen

Characters: Riddle × F/GN!Reader* (romantic, pre-established relationship)

*the reader character has no gender defining charactersitics mentioned

Warnings: swords, book 1 spoilers, violence, mentions of hospital-like settings

By opening the document, you agree to Mx Tattly's terms of source confidentiality.

-ˋˏ’✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Ace laughed in your face when you told him, Deuce and Grim to wait in front of Ramshackle for you to get something, and you came out of the dorm with a pair of swords dangling from your waist, supporting your dominant hand

“Why are you bringing a sword with you? Where did you even find that thing?!”

It was an older pair of swords you found abandoned in one of the Ramshackle rooms, mere days before Ace and Deuce decided to challenge Riddle for his housewarden spot

Something about them told you they would be useful in the situation at hand

But even after hearing your reasoning, Ace still laughed in your face

Boy, was he proven wrong not too long after...

Riddle was just punched by Ace and, before your brain was able to catch up to what was happening, Riddle spiraled out of control

Everyone was trying to reason with him, yet it seemed as if he completely shut out everyone around him

Everyone turned from disobedient students into living targets of his fury

The gravity of the situation finally sunk in when Riddle summoned the rose trees all around the maze and ordered them to attack Ace

Yet, before thinking in through, you jumped in front of Ace and sliced away the threatening branches

They detached from the trunk, turning into cut pieces of cards as they flew past you and your friend

If you wouldn't have stepped in, Trey’s signature spell would’ve kicked in too late

The sky darkened as Riddle’s inner world started to collapse, bringing chaos and destruction to the outside world as well as he overblotted

“In my world, I am the law. I am order made manifest! The only response I will accept from you is ‘Yes, Housewarden Riddle’! All who defy me will lose their heads!”

And, while your Heartslabyul friends and Grim decided to face Riddle head-on, you decided to stay back and protect any incoming danger towards the students the Headmage was evacuating

The crowd of students around the magic mirror diminished, so you returned to the main place of action

Which turned out to be a good call, as a lot of flying debris caused by rogue spells kept flying towards the students

And you managed to redirect any incoming danger with your mysterious swords

Just in time to see Riddle collapse to the ground

You stayed close to Riddle when he woke up and was taken to the nurse's office, and visited him as often as you could

While you felt a personal duty to help out Ace and Deuce repair their destroyed labyrinth, you also wanted to keep Riddle company, mostly to assure him there were no hard feelings between the two of you after what happened

…But your intention were not as clear as you intended initially

Riddle was mostly silent and cautious, and so were you, which made things kind of awkward

Compared to his wary nature, you were trying to be at least a little bit comforting

And he finally realised your intentions when you brought him some tea in a thermos

He was truly astonished by your gesture, even touched by your small kindness

It was some milk tea with herbs he didn’t quite recognise, sweetened with a bit of honey

Bits and pieces of a memory of his crying about milk tea with honey flooded his mind, piecing together the puzzle of your intentions

Not only did you remember such a small thing, but you also went out of your way to cater to him while he was still atoning to his mistakes

Shortly after, Heartslabyul started getting back to its orderly peace as the unbirthday party put together was fast approaching

And you were very satisfied with the peace and quiet

What you didn’t expect, however, was Riddle’s sudden summon to his room directed to you and you alone

You entered Riddle’s room, and he turned around in his chair towards you, leaving the paperwork he was looking over unattended

He was back to working as diligently as ever, something you weren’t sure was appropriate so early in his recovery

But Riddle’s face looked serene and at peace despite his serious eyes, and you decided not to comment

“I believe it is time for the two of us to have a proper conversation about what happened. I know your visits while I was bedridden were… not the most conversation-filled, but I would rather not leave any rocks unturned.”

As gentlemanly as ever, Riddle guided you to an empty seat in his room, and he sat down only after you sat down yourself

“I want to apologise to you for what you witnessed.”

You wanted to interject, but Riddle stopped you with a gesture of his hand

“As a housewarden, my duty is not only to maintain order within the group of students under my guidance, but also to ensure their safety during a moment of crisis. As I was the, um… ‘crisis’ in this case, I was unable to do so. I apologise for falling short on my duty, and for having you make up for my mistakes.”

You were taken aback by the apology, but Riddle was not done yet

“I would also like… to thank you.”

You listened as Riddle poured his heart out to you

“I have heard you were a main participant in ensuring the safety of the student body. It might be hard to believe, but…”

Something in Riddle’s eyes softened, before his gray eyes regained their composed coldness

“I am not cold hearted. I may be harsh, but I care about my card soldiers.”

And you were aware of that

While you helped the Heartslabyul students put themselves together, you’ve heard the grateful stories of a relieved group of students who praised Riddle for his dedication and meticulous nature

They told many stories about Riddle taking time off his schedule to tutor struggling students, who always did his best to offer guidance and who never raised his voice while explaining to students how to tend to the Heartslabyul animals

“I may have fallen short, but you have proven yourself to have a good head on your shoulder in times of need. I thank you for ensuring the safety of my card soldiers.”

You took a few seconds to process his words before formulating your response

“I was just… fulfilling my duty.”

“Pardon?”

“I mean, I am the ‘prefect’, right? I also have a duty to the students. I just did my best to act according to my role.”

Riddle’s eyes widened slightly, and something sparkled in his eyes as a proud smile blossomed on his face

And your heart couldn’t help but skip a beat, being witness of the first time you gave Riddle a reason to smile

“That’s a very elegant answer. You sure are an interesting person, Prefect.”

As time went on, you and Riddle became good friends

Your friendship mainly consisted of you finding your way to Riddle and striking conversations as you followed him around

You didn’t have a particularly threatening aura, but the swords you used during the Heartslabyul event became a permanent part of your uniform

Initially the teachers were not too on board with a permanently armed student, especially since the student body was filled with rambunctious individuals

Yet, Riddle vouched that you knew when it was appropriate to use the swords, putting the professor’s minds somewhat at ease

Lines started blurring little by little as your attachment to Riddle became more obvious, and Rook’s teasing towards Trey about him “losing his spot as Riddle’s knight” started reaching your ears

But you didn’t quite mind

And neither did Riddle

He was, if anything, in awe at your abilities

Riddle was amazed at how natural swords looked in your hands, how your sways and slashes were always forceful yet elegant, wide yet precise

And the sweaty sight of you after a training session did, admittedly, leave Riddle with a racing heart and mind

But, above all, he admired your dedication to improve despite having no guidance

And, with a little push from Ace and Deuce, he put together a plan to help you in that regard

You just entered your dorm when the most unusual gathering of people was seated in your living room

While Ace and Deuce were around often enough to become honorary Ramshackle members slash dorm decoration, Riddle, Sebek and Silver were not part of your usual guest list

You were surprised to hear the invitation extended by a sleepy Silver and a very reluctant Sebek for you to join their training sessions

And it was revealed how Riddle used his connection to the two guards as fellow equestrian club members to ask them for a favor

After you all settled some details with the guards, they took their leave, and exited the dorm as Sebek kept yelling about not allowing you to fall short

And being the teasing pieces of work that Ace, Deuce and Grim were, they left you and Riddle alone as they winked at you

“Is this your way of making sure I keep ‘fulfilling my duty’ as the resident day saver and Hearstlabyul knight?”

Your teasing made Riddle throw you an unimpressed glance that was quickly replaced by a smile

“I am quite sure this will do nothing to diminish the use of your newly acquired moniker, but my priority is to ensure you keep honing the craft you are so obviously proud of.”

Riddle’s words were truly touching, and it was so like him to go out of his way to help the people he cared about…

“Besides, I don’t really mind the moniker. It must mean the students are starting to recognise your skill and dedication.”

That statement really made your heart skip a beat

You hesitated before you took Riddle’s hand into your own

“Well… If you don’t mind the nickname, then I don’t mind it either.”

And you brought Riddle’s hand to your lips, leaving a kiss so soft Riddle almost though he only imagined the soft press of your lips to his knuckles

He took his leave soon after your biggest show of affection yet, but you didn’t mind

Despite Riddle’s reddening face usually being considered a bad omen, you quite enjoyed the brilliant glow of red on his cheeks as he left your dorm

[peachyforthis]

Eternal Duty, Mortal Love

Pairing: Neuvillette x reader (angst no comfort)

Disclaimer: tw: reader’s passing away with time in the end, very slight Neuvillette story quest spoilers idk why i was in the mood for angsty stuff lmao so sorry if this feels rushed as this is my first try in writing, lovers to strangers, reader is human, established relationship to not, I loveee Neuvillette but I feel having a relationship with him would be a lot challenging.

The rain starting to pound against the window barely drowns out Neuvillette’s sorrows as he holds you and lays his head on your shoulder, his tears slowly staining your cloth. Yet you couldn’t move an inch as you stand there, seemingly ignoring his pleas for you to stay, to give him another chance to show his love to you.

As he couldn’t believe that you were over that feeling a long time ago.

“Please stay…” his mouth quivers, and you couldn’t help but remember yourself saying those same words to him. When he would visit you only for a few hours in a week and leave as soon as even a menial work came in his schedule. You couldn’t blame him for this, he was the Chief Justice of Fontaine. The renowned, impartial judge every citizen respected. Your sweet, loving dragon who successfully worked out with humans who admired and respected him back.

But perhaps it was your mistake to think dragons and humans could ever really work out in love.

You had loved and admired him so much, even after knowing he was the Hydro dragon, your feelings for him had never wavered, you read up any book you could find about Dragons to understand him better, tended to him whenever he felt exhausted, while Neuvillette loved you too. Whatever time he could make, he’d be all attentive to you and your needs.

“Please… stay.”, he says again. It was rare to see him in this state.

“It’s over Neuvillette…” You didn’t have enough strength to argue anymore. “We’ve discussed this before…”

His grip on your arm loosened a little as he heard that. He couldn't believe how calm you were. How nonchalant you sounded while saying it..

".. How can you say that so easily? So nonchalantly?.."

His voice faltered a little. You could tell he was trying to hold back tears. He couldn't believe it. He didn't want to believe it..

There was one thing Neuvillette didn’t realise though, your mortality.

He was basically immortal, while you were on limited time. As months went by with his role and workload, Neuvillette thought he would have all the time in the world for you eventually… some day. He didn’t get it that for you it was basically being fed on crumbs. Time held different perspective to you and him. He gave you the best he could but honestly? it couldn’t be enough…

“Neuvillette… I loved you so much.. but i just can’t bear it anymore! I didn’t ask you to stay with me forever and I want great things for Fontaine too… but you chose the nation over me Every. Single. Time… Maybe if you were in my position, you would understand!” Those long nights without him were too much for you to bear.

The second thing was that Neuvillette wasn’t able to choose you enough either…

He had worked so hard to become and uphold the title of the Iudex of Fontaine, honouring the sacrifices his two first companions made and ensuring a better future for the Melusines. So it was inevitable that his duty clashed with his plans for you often. A pang in his heart whenever he saw you choosing him over your work everytime, but could he really choose you over his duty too if the choice came down to it?

Neuvillette honestly couldn’t tell you… or maybe he knew deep down but didn’t want to tell you… as you would feel the same pang in your heart when he had to cancel most of the multiple dates you both planned together.

“I… I had to… it is my duty.”

“Then my dear Iudex…” you sniff as you feel tears forming, “…I wish you well.”

You pick up your bags and start to leave when his hand grips you softly again, as if he knows it’s his last chance to make up your mind.

“Please, love…”

The storm raged on.

He wanted to say so much. He wanted to speak and beg for you to stay, to not leave him..

But his voice failed him. He couldn't form a single word. He just stared at you silently. The expression on his face said everything he wanted to say..

But… maybe it was for the better after all. You deserved so so much more in his eyes. Someone similar to you who would be able to choose you over anything, and give you more and better memories in life.

Meanwhile you look into your lover’s eyes, those purple irises swimming in tears, so tired. Even if you never saw him again, you could never forget him. The ethereal, majestic hydro dragon who once loved you, a mere human. You softly cup his cheek, trying to etch his memory in you forever.

“Goodbye, Neuvillette.”

He reluctantly let go of your arm. He just stood there, silently. He watched you turn away from him..

Centuries have passed by since then, with you long gone. Some sources say you became a wandering traveller , while others say you got married and settled down. Neuvillette doesn’t know, since he never heard from you again. Nevertheless, he had wished the best for you, even after he was left alone to pick up the broken pieces of his heart… even till now.

Something which he didn’t know he had the power to feel until he knew you.

Fate was cruel to you both. He wonders if you would come in another form too some day. Perhaps now that Fontaine has prospered and stable enough to not need him anymore.

After so long his memories of you have been starting to become slightly blurred, but there are some things Neuvillette can never forget.

Like how those centuries ago, in this similar light rain that starts to fall, two rapidly beating hearts had confessed to be each other’s forever…

[thatsdemko]

falling in love again - p.gasly & c.leclerc

masterlist

requested: y

pairings: Pierre gasly x fem!reader & charles leclerc x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of cheating + anxious thoughts + established relationship + love triangle +mentions of affairs

a/n: boy oh boy has this been a challenge for me to write. six drafts later and this is the final product! and yes there will be a part two! there was a second part to the ask that’s not yet complete! ☺️ also a Pierre girl thru and thru 🫡 so this PAINED me to write. would really appreciate some feedback on this xx

weddings are supposed to be happy occasions. the joining of two people coming together as one. the day every little girl dreams of, has finally come for you.

except it’s not a beautiful dream. it’s far worse.

for the past six months of your engagement, the man who once brought you so much joy and happiness no longer gave you that same excitement. you blamed the cold feet, anxieties, and stress of planning the wedding, but the moment has finally come and you still feel that way.

Pierre gasly, is your fiancé and the most perfect man on all paper and of any girls dreams. he’s kind, sweet, caring, and so beyond loving you swear you don’t deserve him. and truth be told, he doesn’t deserve you. he doesn’t deserve a wife who won’t love him the same that he feels.

matter of fact, since the beginning of the engagement your eyes began to fall towards a particular groomsman— the best man may you add, charles leclerc. you never noticed him right in front of you all this time until it was too late.

charles was the other man, and probably the worst friend ever, because for six months he was the reason you arrived home late, you held off on picking a date, and took away all your fears. he’s the man you so badly want to be walking down the aisle to, but he’s not.

charles has convinced himself he’s okay with it. in fact, he’s more worried you’ll say ‘I do’ instead of I don’t because he knows for a fact you don’t love Pierre. at least not anymore.

he knocks quietly on your door of the church. the music is faint but the over excited giggling from your bridesmaids fills his ears. he’s been given the task by Pierre to check on you and make sure you’ve been eating and staying hydrated. it’s sweet how much he cares, but all you care about is that Charles is there to do the same, and maybe worse.

convince you to leave the alter.

“is it safe for me to enter?” he pushes open the door a smidge, his accent rings through the room to let the girls know it’s not your fiancé, and he’s pulled inside by your maid of honor quickly.

“don’t linger for too long out there! he can’t see her.” she hisses, making sure the door is locked behind them, “she’s in the bathroom.”

she points to the door that’s cracked open, the only person in there is you. you’re crouched on the floor next to a bottle of vodka and a fan. the train of your dress is fluffed out all around you. he can hear your mothers voice over the phone, she got too sick to attend, and is trying to now calm you down. you’re terrified of what you’re about to walk into, you can’t marry him.

you hear the shuffling of dress shoes, and you’re greeted to a man in slacks, but when you look up it’s like he saves you from the worst phone call of your life, “I have to go, mama I’ll call you later.” you hang up quickly trying to get up from the floor, and he rushes to help making sure to not step on the white dress.

he swallows the lump forming in his throat, he can’t believe how gorgeous you look. there’s no amount of words to describe how he feels because he’s on the worst rollercoaster of emotions of his life right now. he wants to be happy for Pierre, but part of him holds onto that hope that you’ll disappear with him. leave all this behind.

“mon amour, you look breathtaking.” he breathes out allowing a tear to slip down his cheek, you frown wiping his cheek with your thumb. it almost would be better if he wasn’t here, but you know why he had to be. he’s Pierre’s best man, and it’s his job to check on you.

“don’t be this way, charles. you’re making it hard.” you whisper watching his back lean against the cracked door to gently close it all the way. you don’t have time for what he’s thinking about, you’re supposed to get married in an hour.

“do you have to marry him?” he asks, it’s a dumb question, but it’s the right one to ask considering you don’t even want to answer it. you don’t want to marry him, but now there’s thousands of people arriving to France today for this particular day. it’d be horrible to not walk down the aisle now.

“charles,” you breathe out, mouth going completely thick and dry you can’t speak. you’re blinking away tears to try to keep your makeup intact, you hate this. absolutely hate it.

“I think if you really want what’s best for him, you’d call this off. you’d leave with me instead and we can just go anywhere. anywhere but here.” he takes your shaking clammy hands in his beginning to kiss your knuckles. he strokes your ring finger that for the first time was bare to the bone. the big rock that once sat there was about to be replaced with a promise. one you couldn’t keep.

“cha–“

“no, y/n. I love you and I know you love me. you told me at rehearsals you don’t love him. I can’t see you being happy with him.” he drops your hands from his and he’s twisting open the bathroom door leaving it open for the girls to rush in and check on you. there was now thirty minutes left until the wedding bells would ring.

he slips out the room and heads back to where Pierre is nervously pacing with yuki attempting to get him to drink water. when Charles walks in Pierre is relieved, “how is she?”

“nervous but good.” charles plays a fake smile patting his friend on the back before taking the seat next to yuki who had inhaled the after smell of your perfume on his suit jacket, “you sneaky bastard.” yuki just mumbles shaking his head.

the time is a ticking bomb, it’s now ten minutes and everyone is beginning to line up. charles has been given the honor to walk you down the aisle since neither of your parents or close family could attend.

your hand presses against his back, allowing it to linger longer than it should’ve, “so where would we go?” you whisper hoping the wedding planner and photographers aren’t listening. you take the bouquet from him using it as a shield to protect your privacy.

“anywhere you want, amour. just say the words.” you both watch the first bridesmaid and groomsman walk down the aisle, both moving up closer to the door. it’s t-minus 5 minutes until your arrival in the church.

there’s a long pause between you two, he’s beginning to grow nervous you won’t back out. you’re beginning to have reality settle in for the first time. this is real life, not a fairy tail or a movie. there was no redos, but there was a chance to bolt.

“how about Asia?” you offer, eyes flickering down at the white flowers in your hands before looking up at him. he shrugs giving you a nod, moving up one more space now.

“I could do Asia, but where in Asia?” he asks, one more step closer. three more groups ahead of you both now.

“Japan? heard it’s beautiful.” you loop your arm through his, you throw the flowers to the side both of you watching them silently fall to the ground making the wedding coordinator pick them up.

“your flowers, mrs.gasly—“

“it’s miss y/l/n. just tell him I’m sorry.”

[fakesimp]

Could I make a small request? XP (pls spare me I never made a request before)

Luxiem boys with a haphephobic s/o (tho they are used to touch from the boys there are bad days where it doesn't work)

And it is one of those days cuz a stranger decided to hit on them even if their boyfriend was present. Hence a bad touch day. How'd the boys react and do? OwO"

Haphephobia, with Luxiem

Warning !

Hurt/Comfort ; Established Relationship

A/n !

Haiwo ! I'm so sorry this took a long while, And I'll be writing these in headcanons form, I do hope you love this..

➶◜◝➴

Vox Akuma

Will keep his composure, but lord help the person when he glared at them.

The person will fell on their knees as he look up at him terrified,

That aside, he will be very, very worried about your well being.

Would check up on you, and asked if you want to go back home or not

If you trust him on touching you, he will be so gentle like he's holding a very fragile glass.

He will hold your hand, gently pulling you away from the crowd.

Leading both you and him back home.

If you don't trust him on touching you, he'll try his best to help you.

Though it is going to be a bit challenging for him, but he managed eventually.

Once both of you got home, he's going to ask you, if you want to rest or eat first.

Either way, he's going to indulge into your requests.

"I am so sorry for what happened today dear, Please do let me indulge into your requests, make you comfortable and forget about what happened.."

Mysta Rias

Lowkey losing it also panicking,

He's going to tug your clothes, as he nervously pull you away.

But if the person have the audacity to approach you again,

He will lowkey growl and glare

If you allow him to touch you, he'll put his hand over your shoulder as he lead both you and him back home.

If you don't allow him to touch you, he'll gently tug at your clothes. Looking at you, worried.

When you both got home, he'll kneel in front of you, looking at you. Then around your body to see if you're injured anywhere else other than the spot the person hits you.

He's nervous as you are, but he's trying his best not to look like he is in front of you.

He's definitely trying to find ways to make you forget what happened,

"Hey.. do you want to, uh, watch movie nights together?"

Luca Kaneshiro

The audacity?? Right in front of the Mafia Leader????

Honestly, before the person manage to hit you, he already grabbed the person's hand to prevent it to happen

His grip on the person's arm is strong, if he could break it he would, but he wouldn't, at least. For now.

Letting go the person, he told them to go before the worst happen to them

And then his golden retriever behavior will come back to him again as he looked at you worriedly

Looking around your body to see if you got any injuries anywhere

If you allow him to touch you he will gently grab your hands

Asking are you hurt anywhere? Please do not hesitate or be shy to tell him if you do

If you doesn't allow him to touch you, he will drape over his coat to your shoulders

Both of you still keep going on the day, but he's definitely staying closer than before so that the same incident doesn't happen

"Are you okay? Here let me give you my coat, we have a long day to go! Come on, let's get ice cream-"

Ike Eveland

Arms already out, preventing the person's hand to land on you

His eyes narrowed at the person as he slowly moves over to cover your body with his

He looked at the person with the most, judging look like 'what do you think you're doing?' look as he glances at the people walking pass them

He'll just stand there, staring at the person until the person backs away

After he's sure that they're gone, he'll turn to you

His voice soft, asking you are you alright? Do you know who they are?

Either you know them or not, your safety and your comfort is his priority at the moment

If you allow him to touch you, he'll hold your hand, gently rubbing his thumb at the back of your hands

If you doesn't allow him to touch you, he'll be like luca, draping his coat on your shoulders

"Don't worry, I'm right here to protect you.. come on, let's get going älskling.."

Shu Yamino

He would step over the person and gently push the person's hand back

He'd raise a brow at them, confused

He'll ask the person who are they, but if the person just walks away without answering

It'll make him let out a chuckle, 'that's weird' he said

He turned to check up on you, he'll offer his hand to you

So it is your choice if you want to hold his hand or not

If you decided to hold his hand, he'll smile reassuringly at you, gently rubbing his thumb along your knuckles

If you decided not to hold his hand, he'll retreat his hand back, nodding his head, understanding.

He'll ask if you want to go back or go buy some, food or sweets

Anything honestly to make you forget about what happened

Either way, he's more than happy to do it with you

"That's weird.. anyway, you wanna go get some, pancakes? Or Ice cream? Or both? Haha..!"

©fakesimp . 2023

A/n !

Here you go ! Apologies if it's not what you're expecting.. (⁠╯⁠︵⁠╰⁠,⁠) but I tried my best, also apologies if they're ooc-!

I am, listening to Luca's Honeymoon Un Deux Trois Cover on repeat since yesterday.. dear lord..

[junosmindpalace]

Hihihi!! I absolutely LOVE your writing and i was wondering if i could request a modern setting senku x reader where they're academic rivals? Tho it would be cool if reader (can be either gn or fem!) was good at writing/literature and stuff instead of science like senku. I feel like it would be a silly little dynamic:3 Uhhm i hope it's okay!! Tysm in advance and pls take your time!! <3

hi hi! thank you for your request! i hope this is okay!

Though it often didn't seem like it since he is always so eager to indulge people in their scientific queries, Senku Ishigami is competitive.

This is something that his friend Taiju knows from all their gaming sessions, and later, this is something that is eventually discovered upon further watching him tackle tricky experiments. Never will Senku Ishigami turn his back on someone in need of help, on someone who wants to hear and learn more about science; but when a challenge presents itself, he’s determined to prove himself against it. Not for pride, but a sense of achievement. Excitement.

And for the longest time, you have been the biggest and most exciting challenge Senku has had. 

The same went for you. Senku Ishigami had caught you quite off guard when you first met him. An eccentric, brilliant kid who wowed you with his scientific knowledge and capabilities. And when he discovered you in a similar fashion, a sort of unspoken rivalry was established--

--If rivalry even was the appropriate term to use, because there was never any real malice toward one another, especially from Senku’s end. Yet there was this lingering competitive air between the two of you on who could come out on top in certain projects. This was for all classes and assignments. 

Jabs at one another was just part of your relationship (and sort of ritual, when in competition) with Senku, and certainly from an outsider’s perspective did it come off harsh and from a place of hatred. Any thoughts of malicious intent toward one another were instantly dissolved, however, when said outsider took notice of the way you two looked at each other, with not only matching challenging expressions, but genuine reverence and appreciation for what you bring out in one another.

Science, of course, was where Senku was primarily eager to take up a challenge. Though it was mostly him who showed you up in this area, it was you that showed him up when it came to literature. Reading, writing, communications; now that was your area to shine. It was not only this passion but your extensive general knowledge of the world (and what lies outside of it, which had pleasantly surprised Senku) and ambition for learning, forming relationships, and growing, along with your indulgence of Senku’s own enthusiasm, that made you so exciting to the scientist. 

If previously discussed outsider who assumed that the two of you harbored malicious feelings for one another couldn’t catch on to those lingering gazes and continued to hold their previously stated assumption, there were many other instances that could’ve changed their view. 

The two of you could often be found in a spare classroom sitting at the same table doing work together, asking each other questions and making conversation both pertaining to the work at hand and about whatever else was on your minds. Through the door that was often left half opened, passerbys could catch on to your enthusiastic chatter and get a glimpse through the long thin window an exchange of notes on the table the two of you occupied. 

The members of the science club can always anticipate your visits, your name and face becoming recognizable as a regular visitor despite not being a formal member. Nevertheless you were always welcomed in with updates on projects, and you spent your time looking over (primarily Senku’s) shoulders and having your eccentric friend eagerly walk you through his own recent work.

The school newspaper and book club recognize his face just as much as the science club members recognize yours. The paper has covered Senku’s eccentric projects a few times after taking up your suggestion that the work he does would make for an interesting article. He’s read them and sprouted glowing praise on the way you captured the thrilling essence of science so stunningly (all in an awed tone as he scanned over the paper, while you attempted to exude nonchalance with a shrug, though you could feel the warming in your cheeks give yourself away). The book club has discussed quite a bit of science fiction from Senku’s own suggestions. He’s sat through a couple of meetings despite not being all that interested in genres that weren’t related to non-fiction, sci-fi or fantasy. Still, his in-a-nutshell summaries of chapters and events make you laugh, and so he at least gets something out of them. 

And so when the misconception is eventually cleared up, the outsider can now see how endearing your dynamic really is; the fact that the two of you can get so into your competition but so very easily fall into a groove of working together. You encourage and build each other up to be better with your own work and questions inspiring him, and his inspiring yours. 

And ultimately this is what made you so attractive to one another; the fact that you were both incredibly dedicated, hard working and intelligent people. Now, it’s no wonder the two of you got along so well together 

(If there was something that wasn’t so endearing, and again brought up the point that perhaps you held some sort of malicious intent with your quips, it was when you’d combine your knowledge to gang up on others. The ill-natured vibe it gave off was unintentional on your parts.)

...

[serenaoffaerun]

Tenacity - Chapter 3 of the "Consequences" series

It's finally here!! Thank you all for your patience. Because of the physical letter writing I drew for Tav and Gale's back-and-forth, this took much longer than I anticipated. Plus, the story just kind of...ran away with itself... This chapter comes in at a word count over 8,000 and I don't know how that happened LOL.

Big thanks again to @alpydk who started off this series with what was supposed to be a one-off angst story, and allowed me to write my own sequel chapters to finish the story my own way. (Alphydk's chapter 2 can be found here.) As my first long-form writing in over a decade, it's been a fun challenge to take two characters I love so much and get them out of a position I wouldn't have put them in in the first place. 💜

Without making you all endure any more of my "propensity towards verbosity," I present chapter 3: Tenacity (complete with hand-written letters!)

Summary: After agreeing to try to re-establish their friendship/relationship by writing letters back and forth, Tav and Gale set out on their journey of communicating, listening, and healing. You better believe they're both going to hold on for dear life.

Word Count: 8,289 (I'm not sorry.)

CW: References to depression, alcoholism

Tags: GalexTav, angst/fluff, pre-established (albeit rocky) relationship, future smut? (no spoilers...), brief mention of infertility (in a positive way??), depresso espresso, communication, healing, Tara's getting ALL the tuna.

[I'm sure I left some out, I'll come back and add to it once I get this on AO3 - coming soon!!]

Screenshot: Taken from my own gameplay. Please do not re-post as your own.

NOTE: For those who don't want to read Tav's mediocre (but improving) handwriting or Gale's flowy cursive, the text version is printed below each letter (including doodle descriptions!)

9/2 4:45PM Pacific - EDIT FOR MORE NOTES:

My underlines went away when I copy/pasta'd from GoogleDocs, and now I realize that you can't underline because of links, so they're bolded and italicized instead.

REGARDING BHAALSPAWN INFERTILITY - this is NOT canon to BG3/DnD/Forgotten Realms. I totally made this up to fit my literary needs. 😉

Alpydk's chapter 1: Consequences

Chapter 2: Acquiescence

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tav assessed herself before she even opened her eyes. Between the wine and the crying, she was probably the most dehydrated person in all of Faerûn. The pounding headache she was used to. She'd made blackout curtains for a reason, after all. But the soul-wrenching nausea, that was new.

Being blissfully infertile, she knew there was no risk of pregnancy. One of her permanent "gifts" as Bhaal's former Chosen was the ability to be as promiscuous as she pleased without fear of pregnancy in order to weasel her way into the hearts, minds, and pants of any of her previous victims. Not that she'd needed that ability since the Nautiloid, or especially her subsequent severing from said god. But this was no ordinary nausea anyway. It was coming from somewhere much more complex.

Among the growing list of sensations Tav noticed from her downward-facing zombie position on the couch, she found two long-lost friends: the physical feeling of being simultaneously sated but also achingly empty in her core, and...hope. Surprisingly enough, she realized it was the latter that brought on the nausea.

Crippling anxiety, overwhelming depression, stabbing guilt, these are feelings she was familiar with and knew how to handle: with denial and alcohol. Just ball it up and shove it in the "future ulcer" pocket by the stomach and cover it up with a bottle of wine or two.

Hope, on the other hand, is a fickle bitch. It introduces the possibility of a better future. The idea that things could get better. Then comes the uncertainty.

‘Desirable things in life are never guaranteed,’ she told herself. ‘You can always lose them. Don't get TOO comfortable! You might still have to live the rest of your life without the man you truly believe is your soulmate.’

Tav had NEVER believed in the idea of a ‘soulmate’ before. That was even more laughable than ‘love at first sight.’ But she’d come to believe it now.

‘And you fucked it up, didn't you? You let yourself have the worst lapse in judgment, then you doubled down on it by screaming and being a hurtful wretch. You did this. You did this and you don’t deserve forgiveness, you don’t deserve mercy. No one else will ever fill the hole in your heart, so you’re going to die alone and unloved. That’s what you deserve.’  

The words from the voice in her head kept playing on a loop for the last six months and they wouldn’t shut up. Drowning them out with wine and sleep had become her modus operandi. There’d been nothing to look forward to, nothing to hope for. It was the way things were going to be, she’d accepted it. Especially in the last few months after Waterdeep. She couldn’t have her heart broken again if she didn’t expect anything.

But now, new words were taking up space in her brain. His words.

‘…there was a time that we’d also brought out the best in each other, once. I refuse to believe we can’t find our way back there again.’

‘Fuck.’ Those words had stolen her breath. Given her reason to think that there was a chance. That maybe he would give her the mercy she knew she didn’t deserve. Gale was just that kind of man.

If that were truly the case, though, why did he shut her out so quickly in the first place without getting to even talk about things. Why did he go straight to the biting comments and yelling instead of showing any kind of signs of forgiveness being a possibility.

‘Because you ripped out his heart that was already broken and threw it on the ground with all the remains of any self-confidence he had left after Mystra, you inconsiderate, unfaithful monster. It’s a wonder he’s still alive.’

These were the new conversations Tav now had running back and forth in her head and that’s where the source of the nausea was seated. In the unknown future where happiness still existed. Along the path that could go to life-long depression and loneliness or a blissful existence with the man who completed her, and she wouldn’t know which way she’d end up traveling until she got there. It was terrifying.

‘I refuse to believe we can’t find our way back there again.’

Face still mashed in the couch pillow, she balled up her fist and slammed it down into the cushion. Depression wasn’t going to win today. Or any other day, for that matter, at least not like it had been. She would not allow herself to be swept up in the waves of self-loathing and doubt to the point of being non-functional. Not anymore.

She took a deep breath and sat up, eyes still closed. There was a warmth on her face that she knew would be the late-morning sun coming in through the living room window. As she cracked her eyes open, she winced as the light seared into her brain and fired off pain signals. Slowly, she stood up, walked across the room, and felt around for the blackout curtains.

Medicine. Shower. Food. In that order.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Looking around the room later that day, Tav felt pretty proud of herself. Once she got herself cleaned, fed, and a bit more clear-headed, she opened the curtains again and opened all the windows. Her little depression hole needed a good airing out.

Starting with all the trash, she got rid of the wine bottles, the old food, even the bin filled with dirt and burned clothing. After washing off surfaces and sweeping floors, she put all the books back on the shelf, keeping a box full of scrolls and a quill pulled out on her desk. One sandwich and two sinks full of dishes later, it was nearing night time, but she had one more task ahead of her: the letter.

She’d been chewing over words in her head all day, but she still had no idea where to start. How do you even begin a letter like this? ‘Hi, Gale’? ‘Dear Gale,’? ‘Esteemed Professor Dekarios,’? If the greeting was this difficult, how would she even move on to the rest of the letter? She knew for damn sure that she wasn’t quite ready to be fully emotionally vulnerable, especially with him (even though he’s the only one she should ideally be emotionally vulnerable with…).

‘Welp, might as well just start,’ she said to herself as she sighed.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hi Gale,  [in the top right hand corner was a little swirly doodle with some flowers and leaves. Next to it was written ‘I don’t have fancy paper, so I tried to do something cute?]

I’m having trouble starting this letter, so I figured maybe just admitting that is as good of a place as any. I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what you want to hear, I don’t know what will help or what will just hurt… Here’s what I do know:

-          I’m sorry. [there are tear stains on the paper here]

-          There’s no excuse for what I did.

-          I don’t even know if I know the reason for what I did.

-          I don’t feel like I deserve your patience, your forgiveness, your mercy, anything, really. Your anger is totally justifiable.

-          I don’t know who I was that night or in the months following.

Except, I do. I’d reverted back to the person abomination I walked away from. The hateful, murderous, evil, wretched thing I said I’d never be again. Yet, I can’t claim that I wasn’t in my right mind at the time either. I never lost consciousness. I was aware of the decisions I was making. I just don’t understand why I made them in the first place, other than I’d lost hope. I’d stopped trusting you. I’d assumed you were going to leave me and go back to Mystra or pursue godhood where you’d no longer be…you. [Next to this is a small sketch of a broken heart.]

Here's what else I know:

-          You didn’t deserve that.

-          I don’t deserve you.

[Below this was another item that was heavily crossed out, but you can make out the words ‘I still’.]

(this letter is a mess, I’m sorry. I’m just…flustered)

[On the right side of the paper, there was a list of four items outlined in a rectangle, above which was written ‘Good things’ – a question mark had followed this, but it was crossed out with an X. The four items are:]

-          I took a shower today.

-          I cleaned my house for the first time in weeks today.

-          I’m going to stop drinking for a while.

-          I’m exhausted and I’m going to bed.

It’s not ‘the letter of a lifetime,’ but it’s a start. I hope you’re well and that your students aren’t giving you too much of a hassle. Can’t be as bad as slaying a whole camp of goblins, right? [Here there was a small doodle of a goblin head, X’s for eyes and tongue sticking out, laying in a pool of blood next to a sword.]

I look forward to hearing from you. Take care of yourself, please.

-Tav

P.S. I’m working on my handwriting. I’m sorry if any of this is illegible. Not really a subject that was covered in “Bhaalspawn University.”

[At the bottom of the letter was drawn a curvy vine with leaves, flowers, and flower buds.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Gale swallowed thickly as he held the letter in his trembling hands.

‘She did it. She actually wrote, and it wasn’t full of anger and insults. It was a real, honest-to-the-gods attempt at talking.’

His eyes shimmered as he re-read two lines over and over again:

-          You didn’t deserve that.

-          I don’t deserve you.

His heart ached as he pondered the fact that she thought so little of herself. It made him remember his inner monologue after the debacle with Mystra and the orb. All Gale told himself for a year was that he’d made mistakes so huge that no one should have to ever bear the burden of his presence again. Anyone who showed any affection towards him, platonic or otherwise, was a fool who was wasting their time. They’d just end up being let down by this depressed shadow of a former Archmage. Knowing that Tav was the one now who truly felt she wasn’t deserving of forgiveness or mercy brought tears to his eyes.

He felt a bit lighter, however, at the implication that she even cared whether or not she was worthy of him. Not only cared, but was taking bolder steps forward. She’d apologized, she’d wished him well, she’s taking care of herself… Then it dawned on him that she’d gotten so low that a task as mundane as taking a shower was to be celebrated on a list of positive things.

Oh, did he remember that pit of despair well. He’d spent a year down at the bottom of it. Cut off from all outside contact, forgetting (or refusing) to eat, going days, even a week or more without bathing because he didn’t have anyone to see anyway. No point in expending the energy.

Now, however, Gale was at least teaching. That had kept him going. Even if he didn’t interact with many people outside of Blackstaff Academy, he was still getting dressed, going to a place with other people, and teaching Faerûn’s youth to harness and control the Weave.

But what of Tav? How often was she seeing others? It seems she had relocated after all. The return address is listed in Daggerford, a town not far south of Waterdeep full of retired adventurers, artisans, craftsmen, and farmers. A relatively quiet place compared to Baldur’s Gate, but still a city with plenty of opportunities. (And only a three-, maybe four-day travel from Gale. That would explain how easily she ended up in Waterdeep in the marketplace on that cold, rainy day…).

He remembered her telling everyone how much of a hero she’d been at the reunion party. What happened to her adventuring? Would she even be home enough for their letter-writing to be consistent? She’d made no mention of her activities, that was something he’d want to follow up on. As much as it would have previously brought him satisfaction to see her put in her place for everything she’d said, cut off from others and alone, now it just caused an ache in his chest.

The threads of his bitterness and rage had already begun unraveling. He’d been letting the truth sink in since the reunion: Tav had acted reckless and lashed out because she was scared. Scared of losing him. The thought of him abandoning her for Mystra or for godhood drove her to seek pleasure in someone else. Yet he hadn’t bothered to get to the root of the problem at the time. All he knew was that he had his heart broken. He had been betrayed. He had been ‘abandoned.’

He sighed heavily as the pangs of grief and remorse started to take hold. What a fool he’d been. A self-centered, arrogant, quick-tempered fool. But he shook those thoughts out of his head. This wasn’t the time to keep dwelling on what he had or hadn’t done in the past. Where the ball of anger had resided in his chest, just as roiling and hungry as the Netherese orb had been, he felt the tension had begun to break apart. There was still much healing to do, but now there was a little room for the patience and understanding he’d wished he’d displayed before.

He re-read the letter again, chuckling lightly at her doodles and scratches. Her handwriting had much improved, she gave herself too little credit. It was good to see she still had her silly sense of humor as well. She hadn’t been completely robbed of her beautiful qualities.

Draining the last sip of wine in his cup, he arose from his spot on the balcony and walked inside to sit at his desk. One thing nagged at him before he could start writing his response, though. Underneath the bottom list where she said she didn’t deserve him, she’d written something and then furiously scratched it out. He thought he might know what it said, but didn’t want to get carried away if he was wrong. Holding the letter carefully in front of the lit candle on his desk, he stared at the scratches, trying to piece together the words underneath. His breath caught when his eyes brought them together:

‘I still’

I still… Still what? I still hear the voice of the Dark Urge? I still won’t forgive you?

No. Given the context of what was said and the direction they were going, it had to mean only one thing. He would only allow himself to think it was one thing.

‘I still love you.’

Hoping with everything he had that it was true, he took another deep breath and pulled out a scroll from his desk drawer. It was his turn now.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Dear Tav, [In small writing to the right of the greeting, it says (my ‘fancy paper’ is at the academy) with a winking face doodle.]

Sometimes I think I’d prefer a good goblin massacre to a room full of hormonal teenage wizards learning to control a firebolt spell, but each day is a new adventure, after all! [After this sentence, Gale had doodled a flame, his head/hair with wisps of smoke, and in small writing with an arrow pointing to the drawings, (I tried).]

Thank you for your thoughts, and especially for your apology. I can’t in good conscience say that everything is forgotten, but I fully believe we are on the right path forward.

I would also like to apologize, because you deserve it. You are so much more deserving than you think you are of kindness, understanding and, yes, when I am able, forgiveness. I understand, likely better than anyone else you might know, how strongly self-loathing can take hold.

Which is why I want to tell you that I’m proud of you. I don’t know what you’ve been up to in recent months. I heard you telling the others about some adventuring opportunities, but I gather from your letter that self-care had gone by the wayside. I’m proud and happy to hear that you’re starting to focus on yourself. Yes, I agree with you: showering, cleaning, limiting alcohol intake, and even being tired enough to go to bed are all good things. I hope you continue being kind to yourself.

Admittedly, I’d fallen into a similar rut. While I get plenty of social interaction at the academy, my extra-curricular life has been…non-existent. I come home to my tower, I usually remember to eat, I grade papers, stay up entirely too late researching, and then attempt to get enough sleep to repeat that schedule ad nauseum. The cleanliness of my home, and myself, had been sorely neglected. But as you are focusing on self-improvement, I shall endeavor to do likewise.

Speaking of self-improvement, that’s where the letter-writing idea came from. Rather, through Tara’s efforts to help me during my year of isolation. She’d suggested I do some journalling to write out my thoughts and emotions regarding Mystra. Not only to get them to stop rolling around in my head, but to be able to articulate them. It did help, quite immeasurably, in fact. That’s why I’m so thankful you’ve agreed to this in the first place. I feel like it will serve us well. [A filled-in purple heart was drawn here.]

Actually, I can’t tell you how many letters I started writing to you in the last six months. I really did try. It just always felt…wrong, somehow. Like it wasn’t the right time, or my words weren’t sincere, or they’d fall on deaf ears. But I’m so glad we’re ‘talking’ now. I’ve missed you, Tav… [A filled-in but broken purple heart was drawn here.]

Tell me what you’ve been up to! Tell me your thoughts. Tell me any and everything you want to. I’ll be waiting to take it all in.

Yours,

Gale

[To the left on the bottom, Gale had drawn an open book with an ink pot and a quill. In the middle on the bottom, Tara had been drawn, wings outstretched, lying down, eyes closed, with a small note: (Tara’s sleeping on my desk and she’s adorable!). On the right under his signature, Gale drew a wand with sparkling stars and a curved line of weave making a flourish.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Dear Gale – [Here, she had drawn a wand with stars similar to the one he’d put by his name in his letter]

Thank you for saying that you’ve wanted to talk this whole time. That makes me feel so much better. I never put quill to parchment, but I started countless letters in my head. Like you said, it just never felt right. [After this, Tav drew a scroll, an ink pot, and a quill.]

This does feel like the right path at the right time, but to be honest, Gale…I’m scared. I’m scared to put everything on the table again. With how much I got we got hurt last time we allowed ourselves to be vulnerable with each other, I can’t go through that again. Nor do I want you to go through it again. [Tav had drawn two filled in broken hearts after this paragraph.]

It humbles me to think you feel I’m deserving of good things. Truly. I don’t feel like I am, so I suppose it’s good that someone in this world does. Your encouragement in taking care of myself is unexpected, but ultimately not surprising. That’s just who you are. I’m thankful to hear that you’re taking it upon yourself to improve as well. [Here, Tav had drawn some grapes and cheese on a plate, and to the right of it, a broom and dust pan.]

I fully understand, however, that you can’t forgive me, at least not yet. (I wouldn’t forgive me either.) Hopefully I can begin to earn it over time. I’m not going to sit here and defend my actions with trying to find solace in Mizora’s…experience. It wasn’t even fulfilling, if it makes you feel any better. (It won’t, I know you). It was just tricks of the mind and a devil’s words of promises for things I didn’t even desire. (Perhaps the ‘old me’ would have.) I regretted it immediately, yet it has marked me forever.

But I know that how it left me afterwards is not the point. The point is why I let myself go along with it in the first place. I’ve done a lot of thinking in the last months, especially since the reunion. Let me preface this by saying that I am not shifting the blame. I still made the decision to give in. However, after days and weeks of your near-obsession with the Crown of Karsus, I could see that look in your eyes. You couldn’t stop thinking about the power it could offer. Power that we know all too well would only corrupt you and change you. Then, your meeting with Mystra, introducing her back into your life with her deal to get rid of the orb for the crown… I could feel you slipping away from me.

[On the left side by the words Crown of Karsus, Tav had drawn the crown with a big ‘X’ through it. Near where Mystra is mentioned, she drew a scared ‘Mystra,’ identified as ‘witch bitch,’ being threatened by Tav with a dagger.’]

What I should have done was keep talking to you, seeking reassurance. I should have spat in Mizora’s face and told her to get the fuck out. [In this area, Tav drew herself spitting in Mizora’s face.] I should have sought solace in your embrace, in your words, in your love… But one thing I need you to understand: I was brought up my whole life to be let down. Every success came with a defeat. Every win came with a loss. Every gift came with a sacrifice. You were the most important gift I will ever have in this world or the next. I was positive I was going to lose it, so…I don’t know. I think maybe I wanted to push it from myself first before it was taken outside of my control? Mizora approaching me with her “offer”… She knew exactly what she was doing: giving me an “out” that she knew I would take because I was at my most vulnerable.

For all my accolades being a “Hero of Baldur’s Gate” and savior to many, I clearly didn’t have the strength to stand up to her temptations. I let her use the fact that I have major trust issues to weasel her way into my deepest fears and exploit them. I didn’t have a chance. It doesn’t excuse my actions, but I hope it at least explains them.

I’m running out of parchment. You asked what I’ve been up to. If it’s of any comfort, things are going well enough. I’m eating mostly regularly, I’m keeping up with the chores, and I’m even starting to finally organize some garden space in the yard. I’m trying to spend some time outside every day, and I’ve replaced the wine with various teas. They’re small steps, but they’re steps.

I don’t know if I’ve gotten us closer to any kind of resolution, but hopefully my words can fill in some of the gaps. I look forward to hearing your response.

Thank you, by the way, for giving me something to look forward to again.

I’ve missed you too. Very much so.

Humbly yours,

Tav

[At the bottom left of the page, she drew a cup of tea]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Dearest Tav, [to the right of the greeting, it says in smaller writing (I apologize for the condition of this letter. It was rather difficult to write.) The letter is littered with smudges where tears had fallen and letter had been re-written over them.]

As I wrote my last letter and have been pondering your response, it weighs on me just how grave a mistake I also made. The blame for our downfall does not fully rest with you. (Let me finish…)

Feeling like you’re not worthy, like you made too big of a mistake to recover from; you know how familiar I am with those thoughts. Looking back, this means I should have been the one who was there for you the most. Yet I wasn’t. I was the furthest one away.

I agree with you that my anger was justified. I’d felt like I’d been told I wasn’t enough for you, which is exactly what I feared from the beginning. In my mind, you had openly told the entire world that Gale Dekarios, fallen Archmage of Waterdeep, scorned by Mystra herself, could not, in fact, make you or anyone else happy. You had to go find your pleasure elsewhere.

Where my mistake lies is in never stopping to think how much you had to have been hurting in order to find solace in Mizora in the first place. I don’t think I even gave you the chance to confirm you hadn’t been possessed, quite frankly. It’s no wonder your defenses went up immediately. My reaction, while potentially understandable, was absolutely awful.

I am so sorry that I never gave you a chance to talk things through before letting my hurt and rage take over. What I should have done was walk away and screamed into the void instead of at you before hearing any kind of explanation. I suppose I figured there would never be one good enough. Never did I think until recently that I could have possibly had something to do with you feeling pushed in that direction. I should have been more reassuring. I should have given you no reason to doubt my love for you and my dedication to you.

The possibilities that came with the crown had taken over my waking thoughts, and even infiltrated my dreams. Providing an eternal life without conflicts for both you and I sounded like the perfect solution, and I became hyper-focused. You had tried telling me that you were scared, that you didn’t want me to lose my humanity. I just still thought I was smarter and had this whole grand plan all figured out and you would realize it eventually.

[Before the next paragraph is drawn an infinity symbol, a heart nestled into the loops on either side.]

But I didn’t do enough to put your mind at ease. I didn’t help you understand that I wouldn’t have actually left had it come down to choosing between you and the crown. I never, never would have left you, Tav. As I shouted rather rudely before, I only ever truly wanted you. I assumed you knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt, so I didn’t spend any time reinforcing it. I let my focus drift too far. Then, I left you scared and alone afterwards with no chance to explain. I, the ex-Chosen and ex-lover of a goddess, from whom he should have learned humility after his hubris, the man to whom you showed so much kindness and understanding and support when anyone else would have run in the other direction, I couldn’t even show a fraction of that back to you.

Taviela, my heart, I am so, so incredibly sorry that I wasn’t there for you. When you pulled me from that portal and later heard my harrowing tale of foolishness and desperation, you stood by me. You took care of me and encouraged me, and I threw that back in your face at the first opportunity. It will be a long time before I can forgive myself for that. But I humbly, honestly, and hopefully ask if you could ever forgive me. I understand if you cannot, but know that I will spend the rest of my life proving myself to you.

Please keep telling me your thoughts, Tav. I want to hear them. I need to hear them.

Repentantly yours,

Gale

P.S. I’m far too emotional at the moment to do many little doodles, but yours warm my heart. Please keep doing them. [A filled in heart was drawn here. He had also drawn a simple version of the wand and stars under his name.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

My Dearest Gale, [Across the top of the page was a wand, a wavy line of weave, and small stars.]

I’ve been staring at this parchment for at least an hour, but I haven’t been able to write anything until now. I’m sobbing at your words. Your insight about everything I put you through, the weight of what happened after all your hurts and insecurities from Mystra and the orb, the fear of being inadequate to me… That weight is almost too much to bear. I’ve berated myself for months now for hurting you, but the full impact never hit me until I read it in your words. I want to fall on my knees and cry at your feet and beg for mercy. But how could you possibly ever forgive me? I’m sorrier than you will ever know for allowing you causing you to feel that way again.

Also, to think that you are taking any of this upon yourself so strongly, I really don’t know what to say about that either. I still feel like this is all due to my deficiencies. My weaknesses. My fuck-ups. But I can understand where you’re coming from, wanting to take some responsibility. All I’ll say is that there is nothing to forgive anymore. I hold no more ill will towards you. We both acted like children throwing tantrums, but we were each already pushed to our limits and didn’t stop to think about, well, anything, really.  [Tav had drawn 5 filled in hearts here, along with writing (I don’t know what else to doodle here because I’m also emotional).]

It feels cheap to keep coming back to my upbringing, but it’s an unfortunate reality where I’m concerned. Everything was always a bitter fight of either words or daggers. There was no real “communication” to speak of. There were no “feelings” shared. It was all cruel lessons with harsh punishments. ‘Be a bitch, or get walked over’ was something I told myself a lot. I never truly learned to stop and step back and give things time to breathe. Putting myself in another person’s shoes is something I’ve forced myself to learn, especially during our adventures.

I have a confession to make. When I (literally) ran into you in Waterdeep a few months ago, it wasn’t just happenstance. I’d come there with a purpose. The downward spiral had begun weeks prior and I was nearing rock bottom. I came to look for you. To see if you were possibly even half as miserable as I was without you. I was certain you would be, and that it would give me a reason to approach you. We would be on common ground and might actually be able to talk. [On the right side of the page, Tav had drawn an open book sitting in a puddle of water in the rain. On the pages of the book it said ‘I’m sorry about the books.’]

But then I saw you. You were in the marketplace, smiling, making small talk with the merchants, even laughing with them. You looked full of life. You looked like you were doing just fine – without me. My heart dropped into my shoes and I’d considered just walking away, never letting you see I was even there. But something in me snapped. I apparently just had to get in a couple more digs before I walked away forever. That was childish and unacceptable and I’m sorry I put you in that position. (I don’t blame you one bit for the Hold Person spell, for the record. I deserved it.) [Tav had drawn the symbol for the Hold Person spell here, along with Tav approves.]

Please forgive me, but I’m emotionally spent. I think I’ll wrap this up to send in the morning, go sit on the back porch with a cup of tea, and just think for a while.

Still yours,

Tav

[Along the left side of the bottom of the page, Tav drew a small flower garden. On the right side, a cup of tea.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

My Darling Taviela, [On the right side of the top of the page was carefully drawn an eternity symbol. Inside each side was a heart – a G written in the one on the left, a T written in the one on the right. Next to it, Gale wrote:] (I’ve been doodling this a lot lately.)

My heart aches for you, for us both. You’re right. There’s nothing to forgive anymore. We were both stretched so far beyond our limits, no wonder we broke down. We both have acted out of turn, we both have put ourselves through the wringer, and we both built impossibly high walls around ourselves. I’m happy to say that I believe we can push those walls down now. I want to move forward in whatever way we can, even if that ends up being as friends (though judging by your comments, it doesn’t sound like that will be the case, but please correct me if I’m reading the situation incorrectly).

I have a confession for you, in light of your revelations regarding our “run-in” in the marketplace. It was all an act to save face out in public. The laughter, the ‘life’ you say you saw in me, the light-hearted interactions – they were all a façade. I was miserable without you, however angry I was. After that interaction, it got even worse. I felt awful immediately, leaving you standing there shivering in the rain. [Gale had drawn a hand getting smacked by a ruler with words in a bubble outlined in sharp angles: BAD WIZARD!] I couldn’t believe that, even though there was some provocation, that I’d still reverted to such a childish response. I sank further into my depressive state. I almost didn’t come to the reunion with our companions either, actually. It felt like more of an effort to get myself put together than I was capable of. Fortunately, Tara snapped me out of it.

Speaking of Tara, I’ve been working on getting her to be more understanding. I’m sure you have noticed that her protectiveness of me overrides any kind of empathetic nature towards anyone who has caused me even a lick of hurt. But she’s come a long way in understanding both sides of our…predicament. I’ll keep at it, for both of our sakes. [A trail of small paw prints was drawn after this.]

I’m pleased to say that I’ve been keeping up with the cleaning, [on the right side of the page, Gale doodled a robed hand holding a sparking wand next to two balls of dust that look like rabbits. Underneath was written, (dust bunnies).] I feel like I finally have a handle on my students and my lesson-planning, and I’ve found joy in cooking meals again. Too much time is being spent grading sub-par assignments in the evenings, I’ll admit, but it comes with the territory. My heart has been all the lighter in the last couple of weeks, and it’s all thanks to you: your words, your patience, and willingness to work on…well, us.

What have you been up to lately? Any more adventuring opportunities coming your way? Are you doing any traveling? I wonder if there’s any chance our paths might cross in the near future.

I’ll admit, my mind has been wandering to thoughts of seeing you again. I miss the warmth of your embrace, the sparkle in your smile, the feeling of home when I look into your eyes – I feel like a part of me has been missing since our falling out.

I was actually thinking… What would you say to coming back to Waterdeep for a proper visit?

Take care of yourself, my darling [a filled-in heart was drawn here]

Gale (no fancy drawing in my name this time. Just me, missing you.) [above this, Gale had drawn a side profile of himself from the chest up, looking down, eyes closed, a tear falling from his eye.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The letters had been going back and forth at a regular, weekly pace. It was about six weeks after the reunion, which already seemed like forever ago. They had come so far, and his words made her realize that she missed him more than she knew was possible.

However, when Tav saw the last question in Gale’s letter, she froze. Her chest tightened and her breath quickened. She got dizzy, her hands shook, and her mind raced, tears threatening to overflow onto her cheeks. She was having a panic attack.

She threw the letter in her top desk drawer, slammed it shut, ran down the hall, and pulled the lever for her shower without bothering to warm the water first. Fully clothed, she stood underneath the cold deluge until her breathing slowed and she could process her thoughts.

The nausea was back. She sat on the floor on a towel and just let the water drip off her. Tucking her knees up to her chin, she stared at the wall and focused on her breathing. She wanted nothing more than for Gale to walk in the room right now, pick her up, and hold her in his lap, caressing her hair and whispering comforting words to her until she felt better. But as much as she wanted to feel his arms around her, to smell his scent, to run her fingers through his hair and more, she was absolutely terrified.

All she could think of as she started rocking back and forth was that she was going to end up hurting him again. She cried and cried until she resigned herself to lying down on the floor and crying herself to sleep, shivering in her damp clothes.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A week went by and there was no response from Tav. Gale tried to brush it off, attempting to convince himself that perhaps she had gotten a chance to do some traveling, and was running behind sending her letter.

Nine days went by and his resolve started to falter. He replayed every word in his head that he’d written in his last letter. Was he moving ahead too fast? Did he assume too much? Did he push her too far? He ached to see her, to hear her voice, and to comfort her. But he could NOT let himself fuck things up again…

On the tenth day, he sent just a short message in hurried writing, requested for the utmost urgent delivery.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tav,

I’m truly, deeply sorry if I’m pushing you too far. You don’t have to answer the last question. We can continue just writing if that’s what makes you comfortable. I’ll do whatever you need, but I cannot, I will not lose you again.

Please, talk to me, my love.

Gale [A filled in heart was drawn after his name.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sleep never found him that night. He let his brain run through every worst-case scenario it could come up with. Tears were still crawling down his face every so often as he saw the faintest colors of the dawn coming to greet the eleventh day. Thank the gods he had the next couple of days off for Midsummer…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

On the afternoon of the twelfth day, Tav’s response arrived. Gale didn’t even go back inside or shut the door. He ripped open the envelope and tried to steady his breathing as his shaky hands held her letter. He let himself take a deep breath and fall back against his door frame as he read:

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

My precious Gale,

I am so very sorry for the delayed response and for making you worry. I don’t know what came over me, but when I saw you asking to see each other again…I panicked. I had a full-on panic attack, after which, I slept for days. I lost all track of what day it was or how much time had gone by. I kept picking up my quill and the words just wouldn’t come. I’m so sorry. Your words in the message I received today snapped me back out of it. Thank you for checking on me. [A filled-in heart was drawn here.]

Gale, I can’t bear the thought of hurting you again. I’m not saying that I don’t want to see you. Believe me, nothing would make me happier. My dreams of getting to be near you, to hold you again, to be held by you, they are my greatest source of comfort. But we haven’t spent any time together in person since the reunion, and we spent months before that acting like completely different people.

What if we can’t change, Gale? What if seeing each other brings out all the anger and spite again? I can’t forgive myself, even if you have. I don’t know what to say – I can’t lose you again either, I won’t survive it. And I fear that I will become upset by something and fall back into my old ways of dealing with arguments: with juvenile pettiness and venomous words. I’m so scared…

In fact, I’m going to deflect now so I don’t dissolve into another panic attack.

To answer your other questions – honestly, adventuring hasn’t happened in a while. I was being truthful at the reunion when I said I’d been adventuring and helping people. But coming back from Waterdeep is when I started to shut everyone out. My house descended into chaotic messes that I didn’t have the energy to clean, I stopped eating regularly, I was drinking at least a bottle of wine a day, and I slept all the time. I have enough money set aside that I can get away with not working for quite a while, but that won’t last forever.

The gardening is going well now though! I haven’t killed so much as a tomato plant! I’m growing flowers and selling bundles here and there. I’m also growing my own vegetables and some fruits, though I haven’t begun selling those yet. I’m getting the itch to start baking, however… I’ve found a great deal of fulfillment in creating (growing) some kind of life now instead of dwelling on the memories of taking it. [Along the left side of the page, she drew a tomato plant crawling up the side. Along the right, she drew a plate of danishes and a cup of tea.]

I’m so sorry again for worrying you. I just froze because I don’t want you to get hurt. I’ll get this sent to you as quickly as I can, but please tell me your thoughts. I’m hoping your insight can be of some comfort.

With all my heart,

Your Tav

[At the bottom of the letter, Tav drew the same symbol Gale had been doodling on everything he could: the eternity symbol with the hearts in the middle, one with a G, one with a T. Next to it, she wrote:] (I tried… Yours looks much nicer.)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

My sweet Taviela, [Their infinity symbol with hearts and their initials was on the top right.]

Thank you for explaining the reason for the delay. I completely understand, and I’m sorry to have caused you to panic. If I may offer some encouragement, however, perhaps I can help quiet your heart.

Neither of us are under anywhere near the amount of pressure and stress that we were at the time back in Baldur’s Gate. We are taking care of ourselves now as individuals, fully independent of others, and neither is a crutch for the other. This bodes well for quelling any fears of being too dependent on each other for our own good.

We’ve seen what damage can be done by careless words and actions, and we’ve walked back from that ledge – together. Now we’ll be more aware of the warning signs should we become frustrated with each other again. We’ve talked about what we can do to avoid arguments in the future, like walking away for a breather, should we need to. Lest you have any unrealistic expectations, please remember that we will become frustrated with each other and we will likely have some arguments. That’s only natural for any two beings that have a close relationship. But we have some experience now and wisdom gained. I truly believe that we can be better for each other. We can change. Together. [A filled in heart is drawn here along the left side of the page.]

If you are comfortable thinking about the possibility of visiting, I have a proposition for you. Some simple guidelines that will help keep us in check as we try spending time together again, under completely different circumstances.

-          I will get you set up in a lovely room at The Yawning Portal for one week. The bartender owes me a favor for clearing out some riffraff a few weeks ago. Then you can have a place you feel comfortable retreating to without feeling trapped in my tower, should you wish to get some space.

-          So as to not put too much pressure on either of us too quickly, we can have a date each day, but we don’t spend the entire day together (at least not every day). It may be midsummer, but I still have regular responsibilities with the academy that I need to see to. Besides, that will give us time to individually reflect on our time together and how we’re feeling.

-          At the end of the week, we can talk about how things have gone and what direction we should go at that point. We won’t pressure each other, and we’ll agree that we won’t be disappointed if one person needs more time than the other. Above all, we need to make sure our friendship stays in tact.

So, what do you say? Look! I even got Tara’s stamp of approval! [On the side of the page is an ink pawprint.] (Do you have any idea how much convincing it took to get her to put her paw in ink? I owe her tuna for weeks…)

I won’t pressure you, but if you’re amenable to this plan, we can do this as soon as you’d like – even next week. Having said all that, if you still want to take things slower and keep writing letters for now, I will fully support that decision and be delighted to keep doing so.

If you will allow me, however, I would like to make one last plea: I want to see you, Taviela. I need to see you. My heart aches for you and my arms feel so painfully empty without you in them. I long to curl my fingers into your hair, to hear your contended sighs, to be lit up inside by your laughter, and, when you’re ready, to make love to you and cover you in affectionate, healing kisses until every hurtful word we’ve ever exchanged is erased from memory itself.

I know you’re scared, my darling. But I believe in us. I believe things will be different this time around. I hope and pray to every god and goddess who will listen that you can find it in your heart to take the risk.

Come here to me, my love, and we can keep walking our way forward - together. [A filled in heart is drawn here.]

I eagerly await your reply, whatever it may be.

Yours always,

Gale [A doodle of a wand surrounded by stars is by his name.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tav’s hands trembled. Gods, she missed him so much it physically hurt. Especially now that she knew how much he was missing her as well. Sitting at her desk, she re-read his last full paragraph with tears flooding her vision and heart filling her chest, not to mention a familiar heat between her thighs. She knew at that moment that her desire and her renewed trust in Gale Dekarios FINALLY outweighed her fears. She didn’t even need to think about her response. It was short and sweet:   

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Gale, my love, [Their eternity/hearts/initials symbol was drawn on the top right.]

I’ll set out tomorrow by horse from Daggerford and will arrive at the Yawning Portal on Sunday evening around dinner time. I sincerely hope your arms will be waiting for me, because I’ll be rushing into them the moment I see you. [A filled-in heart was drawn in.]

Just don’t be holding a stack of books this time… [ Tav had drawn a doodle of a winking face here.]

Yours always,

Tav

P.S. I doubt we’ll be waiting long for those healing kisses… I know we’re going to space out our time together, but stay with me the first night? Help me “settle in” to Waterdeep? [Tav sketched a set of lip prints in the bottom right.]

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tears fell from Gale’s eyes, but happy ones this time. He could tell his cheeks were flushed too from her “P.S.”… He laughed at her jab about the books, then folded up the letter and brought it to his lips, kissing the edge she would have folded with her soft hands.

He had planning to do. 

[invye]

How They Met [2/3] - CoraHawk

[CoraMiShanks Fix It AU]

I think it's time I write up my thoughts about how exactly Mihawk, Shanks and Rosinante met and outline the start of what will become their relationship. And since I am pathologically incapable of writing short posts, I'll cut it into three, so I can take my time.

Mihawk & Shanks [link]

Mihawk & Rosinante/Corazón [this post]

Rosinante & Shanks [link]

- Mihawk & Rosinante/Corazón -

Technically, Mihawk meets Rosinante before he meets Corazón. It just takes until meeting Corazón for him to realise that he did indeed cross paths with then Marine Ensign Rosinante a couple years back.

For that he can 'thank' Vice Admiral Garp. The Warlord system was created about a year into the aftermath of Rogers' execution; and with nothing better to do, Garp apparently decided that Mihawk would make an excellent addition. They spent another year playing catch across the Grand Line, with way too many cannonballs lobbed at Hitsugibune way too close for comfort, until Mihawk gave in.

Really it was less giving in and more getting bored. He had fought his way through the new and coming pirates, had found himself the old and established swordsmen and beat them all. Two years and the only interesting challenge left for him was Shanks, and the Dark King Rayleigh, whenever he deigned to resurface again. It wouldn't be long until the title is his, some people already considering him the Strongest Swordsman, and with the amount of Marines he has killed along the way, he's gained quite a lot of attention. A fact that becomes annoying as the Marines sent after him are more of an insult than a threat.

So Mihawk accepts Garp's invitation to join the Warlords. His acceptance was met by Garp laughing, clapping him on the back and then turning to a blond Ensign and saying: "See Rosinante, I told your old man I'd get him!"

Mihawk didn't make a habit of remembering Marine Ensigns, but when five years later that very same Marine turns up at the Warlord meeting as a silent shadow to Doflamingo? Colour him intrigued. He knew it was worth attending the meetings for the wine and the drama alone.

Corazón is not having a good time. Two months in deep cover and he couldn't convince Doffy not to drag him everywhere and loudly announce his long lost brother returned. So now he's standing in the corner of a room with six of the Seven Warlords assembled and has to pretend he doesn't know Sengoku sitting at the other end of the table. To make matters worse Doffy is making a scene as usual and the (former? please say former--) Marine Hunter has been unblinkingly staring at him ever since they walked in.

To make it even worse, Knight of the Sea Jinbe, leans over to Mihawk, says something, receives a response and then proceeds to give Rosinante Corazón an extended quizzical look of his own. The cherry on top comes at the end of the meeting, in form of Dracule Mihawk, Marine Hunter, walking by Corazón on his way out and quietly, just for them to hear, saying: "Good luck on your assignment, Donquixote Rosinante. You will need it."

Corazón falls over his own feet with how quickly he rushes after him.

Turns out the Marine Hunter / Strongest Swordsman / (Hawkeyes?) / Dracule Mihawk a) is not at all intimidated by Rosinante's silence ability, b) remembers Rosinante from his Ensign days on Uncle Garp's ship, c) dislikes Doffy with an unexpected fervour and d) thinks Rosinante is the worst possible choice for the job. Great.

Oh and also his Observation Haki is so strong that even despite the Silence blocking out all sound, he knows Doffy is about to walk in on them having a conversation. With words. That he isn't supposed to be able to speak.

Corazón swears he has been given extensive undercover training before all this. He swears. The deep cover preparation was a whole big thing across an entire year. But how is he, an alleged mute, supposed to explain away an extended interaction with another Warlord during which he didn't write a single note??

So here he is. Kissing the Marine Hunter and praying that Hawkeyes won't kill him for it. Or blow his cover.

And for some insane reason Rosinante will never forget to thank his luck for, Hawkeyes goes with it. Kisses him back (okay, first off, wow), gives Doffy the coldest side eye that has even his insane brother take a step back, says something about Rosinante better being safe in the upcoming storm, and manages to slip him his contact information under the guise of pulling out Rosinante's sunglasses which he proceeds to put on his face for him.

Rosinante Corazón is floored.

Doffy is delighted that his brother brings a connection this powerful to the table.

The message going along with Hawkeyes' number reads: "For when you inevitably require competent assistance" in perfect cursive that Mihawk must have written before all this.

[inconsistentlywrittensoul]

I’m way behind on posting about my rewatch - there’s plenty I do want to say about S2, and there’s a whole essay about gender and Phases that I’m probably never going to write - but I’m into Season 3 and I really want to note how much early S3 establishes the issues that are going to drive Buffy’s long breakdown in seasons 6 and 7.

Firstly, Buffy's tendency to pull away from her friends, feeling she has to take care of everything for herself and protect them from her problems and her feelings rather than sharing them. It’s a consistent pattern, and we see it in her running away at the end of Season 2, and continually refusing to talk about what happened with Angel with both the Scoobies and Faith. When she eventually does try to talk to her assigned school counsellor about Angel, she explicitly says she can’t talk to anyone else about what’s happening (only to find him dead, which I’m sure didn’t help).

Of course, this isn’t just a flaw of Buffy’s - her friends have a pretty big role to play, especially Xander. His sanctimonious, judgemental whining about Buffy leaving, as well as anything to do with Angel, does a lot to push Buffy away. (Not to mention the first thing he does when he finds out Angel is back is try to manipulate Faith into murdering him.) It’s also hard not to suspect that Xander’s lie back in Becoming did a lot of damage - because of that, Buffy thinks even Willow hates Angel and wouldn’t understand her continued feelings for him. ‘Kick his ass’ made Buffy feel like literally no-one is on her side.

Regardless of the reason, here we see the beginning of the split that will make Buffy feel increasingly isolated and unable to trust or rely on anyone as the series continues into the depression years, especially Season 6. But we also see the start of a pattern that will become a central flaw in Season 7 - her inability to express empathy or care for anyone who she sees as a reflection of herself.

I’m actually not talking about Faith here - that’s related, but it’s also a whole can of lesbian worms I don’t want to get into right now. But aside from Faith, in the first few episodes of Season 3 there are two girls who mirror Buffy, specifically in her relationship with Angel. In Anne, we have Lily/Anne, who’s wants to spend the rest of her life with her older boyfriend, who has a criminal past and seems a little crappy but also genuinely loves her and is trying to be good to her, and who ends up being sent to hell. Then in Beauty and the Beasts, we see Abby, who started dating a guy who seemed nice at first, but who turned out to be an abusive monster. Both are very obvious parallels to Buffy in her relationship with Angel (in soul-having and soulless forms), and serve as ways for her reflect on that relationship.

But what I want to focus on is the fact that, while Buffy does try to help both girls, she’s also unusually harsh and unempathetic towards them. Her attitude is ‘This is how things are, and you need to set aside your emotions and just deal with it immediately and without emotional support’; it reflects how she treats herself, but it’s also a pattern in how she treats people whose challenges reflect hers. Which will come to a head in how she treats the Potential slayers in season 7, and the way she alienates everyone around her in part through her treatment of them (and therefore also her treatment of herself).

It’s just interesting to see these issues that will dominate the last couple of seasons come across so strongly in this early part of Season 3.

[cam-ryt]

Just nudging myself into your inbox as a complete stranger 🌈 for Obikin prompts: things Anakin changed about Obi-Wan's life as a Padawan.

It's Sunday prompt day again 🥳

Ngl this one made me tear up a bit but I took great pleasure writing it because their relationship is so precious to me ❤️‍🩹

TW : mention of death

I'm still taking prompts btw ! I'm just slow to write because I'm busy during the week, but you can still send them to me and they will be answered eventually 🌼

_______

It was supposed to be just another pathetic life form Qui-Gon had picked up in the deepest corners of Tatooine. An enslaved little thing he had freed and separated from his mother on the grounds that the child had a midichlorian count even higher than Master Yoda. 

Obi-Wan was more than skeptical, and maybe a little jealous that his Master had turned his entire attention to that tiny, dirty and incredibly chatty boy who was always cold, no matter how many layers of clothes they put on him. 

He had spent a lot of time observing the kid from a safe distance, trying to understand what was so interesting about him. 

He was clearly gifted in the comprehension of the engineering and mechanics of things, able to fix everything with anything and already speaking a technical language Obi-Wan didn't even try to comprehend. Still Qui-Gon could spend hours listening to his rambling with a fond expression on his face that made the young Jedi's heart clench. 

Anakin - he refused to call him by the little nickname everyone seemed to have adopted - was trying to reach out to him every once in a while. Obi-Wan suspected the child was like a cat, always seeking attention from the most disinterested people. He probably didn't like that Qui-Gon’s padawan was still the only one to resist his charming blue eyes and angelic face. 

Obi-Wan didn't interact with him more than necessary, and when he made efforts it was generally after Qui-Gon made a face at him or scolded his attitude towards the younger one. It pissed him off. Anakin was Qui-Gon’s responsibility, not his. He had decided to set Obi-Wan’s training aside to take care of the kid, he couldn't expect his padawan to do the same. 

The few months following Anakin’s entry into their life were a troubling time for Obi-Wan. His daily meditation sessions gravitated around the control of his emotions and his acceptance about the situation. 

It was challenging to hear his Master praise a child day after day for a future that was still incredibly blurry. Anakin didn't even know how to use the Force yet. He was maybe extra-sensitive to it but Obi-Wan joined the council when they said he was too old to be trained. 

If he listened to the darkest corners of his heart he secretly wished Anakin was too old to be trained. He didn’t know how he would react to Qui-Gon taking him as his apprentice. Abandoning him. 

He was not ready yet. He still had a lot more to learn, even if his Master often told him otherwise. He was not ready to let go of the relationship they had developed for so many years, to the comfort and intimacy of it. The bond they shared had been so long and hard to create that he didn’t want to lose it. 

Qui-Gon was his only family, his friend, his teacher, the only one he could rely on in almost every situation. 

Qui-Gon was the universe he floated safely around day after day, a strong and steady pillar in his life, eternal and reassuring. 

And now Qui-Gon was gone. Killed by the filthy hand of a Sith. And his last words were for Anakin. 

The weeks after his death, Obi-Wan moves forward by the mere strength of his will and the comfort he finds in pre-established routines. He feels like a ghost, forcing himself to put one foot in front of the other while his head feels like he’s underwater. 

The child is hard to manage. He cries a lot. Obi-Wan thinks he doesn't really understand what's happening. Master Windu says he’s old enough to understand that Qui-Gon will never come back. 

Obi-Wan doesn’t know how to take care of him. He already doesn’t know how to take care of himself. He’s so caught up in his own grief that he doesn’t have the strength to feel ashamed when he lets Anakin on his own. 

It still twists his gut when he hears the little boy crawling to the bottom of his bed in the middle of the night, curling himself like a kitten on the sheets, making sure to always be far enough not to touch him. Obi-Wan lets him, but he pretends to sleep every time Anakin wakes up in sweat and tears after a nightmare. 

There’s a part of him whispering in his mind that Qui-Gon would still be alive if he hadn’t tried to save the kid. 

But Anakin clings to him no matter what. No matter how Obi-Wan ignores him or speaks to him or pushes him away. He endures all his moods with his head down, patiently waiting for the storm to pass. 

It infuriates Obi-Wan at first. He’s not proud of it but he’s sometimes mean to him, trying to push until he finds his limit. It would be easier if the child hated him. But Anakin never says anything. He might have tears in his eyes but he always comes back to him. 

It takes a while for Obi-Wan to understand that Anakin is even more lonely than he is. Where Obi-Wan has the Jedi council and a few friends across the galaxy, Anakin has no one except for Qui-Gon. And now that Qui-Gon is dead, the closest thing to him… is Obi-Wan. 

After he’d been granted the rank of Master, time flows a little bit more easily and Obi-Wan falls into a reassuring routine. 

He’s heard that time heals all wounds, and it does. It’s slow and it's not linear but he manages to keep his head above the water a little longer each day. 

Then Master Yoda approaches him, asking if he will train the boy now. Obi-Wan surprises himself by accepting after only a day of reflection. It’s Qui-Gon dying wish and it’s the only reason why he does it, he assures himself. 

Anakin learns quickly, and he’s desperate to please. Obi-Wan starts to see what his Master saw in him. 

The child is talented, and he works hard, almost always to the point of exhaustion. 

Obi-Wan tries his best teaching him about the Jedi Code, about the spectrum of the Force, about their purpose in the universe. Mostly he parrots what’d been taught to him, not really knowing where to start and where to go. He’s still lost and he realizes soon enough that having a padawan is a responsibility he wasn’t prepared for. 

In addition, they have to learn to navigate through the new bond forming between them. They don't use it yet but they’re both aware it exists in the Force. Master Yoda says it’s the beginning of all things. 

Anakin is still careful around him, he doesn’t ask for much except a little bit of attention. He still sleeps on the farthest corner of his bed but when he has nightmares, Obi-Wan allows him to scoot closer. 

Their relationship changes slowly and smoothly enough that the older Jedi doesn’t realize when Anakin started calling him ‘Master’, or when he had made a mental note of the kind of food he liked after a hard training day. 

It bothers him at first, to realize that despite what he’s telling himself, he cares about Anakin. He does. The boy did grow on him and he has to admit that he likes teaching him more often than not. 

Anakin might feel the shift because he becomes more comfortable around him, less inhibited and more like himself. Obi-Wan discovers a funny kid with interesting stories, and they start to talk more.

As they open up to each other, they get closer. Obi-Wan asks about his life on Tatooine and Anakin asks about his life at the Jedi Temple. They don’t talk about Qui-Gon, the subject still too painful, even years after. 

Anakin is thirteen and he doesn't stop growing up. Obi-Wan says he’s big enough to sleep in his own bed and Anakin says ‘okay’ but he still sneaks in in the middle of the night. He’s becoming more confident, timidity being progressively replaced by insolence when he wants his Master’s attention. He doesn’t really have friends, despite the council’s advice. He’d rather spend all of his time with Obi-Wan. 

The older Jedi wonders sometimes if that kind of dependence is healthy. He himself starts to feel the aching feeling of loss when Anakin is away from him for more than a few hours. The realization bothers him for a couple of days. What if he’s trying to find a substitute for Qui-Gon in the last thing his Master put his faith in ? He wonders if he has to open up to Master Yoda about this. But he’s never been one to open up easily, especially not about the internal turmoils of his heart. 

So he decides to take the matter into his own hands. 

Of course, Anakin doesn’t understand why he becomes so distant all of the sudden. Why he locks the door of his bedroom or why he leaves him with training groups when he never did before. 

But his Padawan is not the scared nine years old he was when they met, he has a voice and he’s not afraid to use it. 

He confronts Obi-Wan about it and when the Jedi doesn’t give him a satisfying answer, he yells about it. And then he cries about it. He says that Obi-Wan is being unfair and that he always did everything his Master ever asked and that he's being mean punishing him for something he didn’t do. 

Obi-Wan is taken aback when he understands that being away from him is a punishment for Anakin. It comforts him in his decision. 

It last two years. Two years of constant fights between them, two years of Anakin shouting the most horrible things to his face but still sleeping every night on the floor behind his door. Two years of him threatening to leave the Order but meanwhile becoming the more talented padawan of his generation. 

Two years of tension rising up between them. Until it breaks. 

One day Obi-Wan is holding onto the stubborn idea of what their relationship should be according to the Code  and the next he can’t bear to hear Anakin tell him he hates him for the thousandth time. 

He’s just so tired of what they have become. He tries to convince himself he did it for Anakin’s good but he can’t lie to himself anymore. They both suffer from the situation and it brought them nothing except a painful lack of trust and resentment. If he’s truly honest with himself, he doesn’t feel at peace when his padawan is away from him. 

A discussion with Master Yoda makes him understand how he had mistaken independence with rejection, and how his fear of losing Anakin like he had lost Qui-Gon might have been the trigger to the whole mess he’s drowning into now. He had thought that if he doesn't get attached, he doesn’t take the risk of suffering again. But he’s suffering right now, so it was all in vain, years ruined by his own insecurities. 

And he misses Anakin. So he tells him. 

Anakin being Anakin yells at him before listening. But this time Obi-Wan doesn't back up, doesn’t give up on them. He patiently faces his padawan’s anger and listens while Anakin spits his bleeding heart out of his chest and cries and yells some more. 

Then Obi-Wan pulls him into his arms and Anakin stops crying and yelling, too stunned by that foreign thing that is his Master’s affection. It the first time they’re so close and it heals something in Obi-Wan. 

It still takes two more years until they trust each other like before. Except it’s even stronger than before. Obi-Wan came to the realization that the peculiar bond they share is a strength and not a flaw. 

They’re constantly with each other, flying together, training together, fighting together, sitting through boring meetings together. They even share their personal life together. 

Anakin has a permanent place on the left side of Obi-Wan’s bed. Abandoned pieces of a half built droid are lying on Obi-Wan’s desk. There’s a toothbrush in the bathroom that Anakin left just in case. In case of what, Obi-Wan never knew. 

He doesn't really question it. He's never felt so alive with Anakin by his side. The young man is like the brother he never had. 

Time flies and Anakin doesn’t stop growing up. When he’s nineteen Obi-Wan has to raise his head to look at him in the eyes. He struggles a bit more to match his strength during training. He begins to notice the way he attracts attention while being totally oblivious about it. 

He's proud of the Jedi Anakin is becoming. Of the man he's becoming. Fiery and passionate, smart and creative. He truly thinks that if his lightsaber skills matched his wit, he could easily overpower Master Yoda in a fight. 

But he also knows that if Anakin looks  bold and confident on the outside, on the inside there’s still a huge part of him being the little boy he was on Tatooine. He's still full of insecurities, still afraid and starved for affection. He still has nightmares that Obi-Wan tries to chase away night after night. 

Their relationship is not perfect. They still fight, especially since the war against the separatists is hovering menacingly over their head. But as long as Obi-Wan can feel Anakin’s heart beating peacefully when he holds him at night, he decides it’s all worth it. 

Now that he’s facing death, Obi-Wan thinks about all that. About all the changes Anakin brought into his life. About how Anakin made him change and progress as a Jedi and as a man. About how the majority of his life had been Anakin. Anakin’s fears, Anakin’s joys, Anakin’s tears staining his clothes, Anakin’s scent on the sheets of his bed, Anakin’s hand on his shoulder after an exhausting mission, Anakin’s padawan braid tucked inside his utility belt, Anakin’s ambitions and frustrations and trust and anger and love and hatred. He wonders what he has missed. Where he has failed. 

Maybe if he had loved him more, if he had loved him earlier, better, he wouldn't have to face one of his worst nightmare right now. Loosing him to the dark side. Mourning him while he was still alive. 

Having to take the most painful decision of his entire life. Having to kill half of his soul. 

He knows he has to. He knows he can’t. Not when there’s still something of Anakin inside Vader. 

Maybe Vader is right after all. Maybe he is weak. 

He’d rather doom the entire universe than hurt the man his heart is aching for. He’d rather die than even think about killing him. 

So he does. 

And when Vader plunges his lightsaber into his heart, all he’s thinking about is Anakin’s smile, shining brighter than the Tatooine’s suns when they exchanged that promise to always care about each other, no matter what happened. 

[rambheemficrecs]

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[sinninghowlter]

Danisnotadom

Ship: Phan Rating: E Contains: collaring, pre-established relationship, very light angst, degradation, namecalling, smut, cursing, heavy language, d/s undertones, daddy kink mentioned four (4) times, use of the word "slut" Words: 5746 Summary: Dan's not a dom. Everyone swears up and down that he is, insists he is domming his boyfriend and is too good to take it in the ass.

Phil's not a sub. Everyone thinks he is, everyone thinks his baby is in charge. What they don't know is his hardcore boyfriend is actually a princess. Read it below or on AO3

This fic was a brainchild of mine back in December 2022 and finally, here it is! It wouldn't exist if not for the cheering on of the Superstarkers groupchat on Discord and my writing friend @khalixascorner!! Thank you for believing in me and this fic with two strangers you've never heard of before me. A/N: this is unbeta'd and uses 2015 phandom with 2022 dan and phil. :)

 "Alright guys, Dan insists he's starving so I've gotta feed him before he eats me."

 "Not like that!" Dan shouts from the other room, "I just have been in the U.S. for so fucking long that all I want is familiar food goddammit!" 

 "You can't swear on my live streams, Dan!!" Phil shouts back. He begins scanning the chat, hoping that a slew of messages reading "OMG PHAN!!!!1!1!" and "DOMESTIC!!!!" doesn't follow. Instead of the expected messages, he starts seeing a few, albeit more explicit, replies in the chat: 'I bet he likes it that way', 'Dan probably eats him all the time', 'We all know Phil likes his daddy to eat it.' He hides the need to frown and roll his eyes behind a smile, answering an ask about what kind of plant the followers should get. "Um... I think you should get a cactus! They're always a good choice!" 

 "Phil! I'm starving!! Let's gooooooooOO!!!" Dan whines, now in the doorway. Phil looks up, taking in the younger's form leaning against the white wood. Dan smirks as Phil's eyebrows raised in challenge. 

 'omgggg look at the way he looks at Dan!!! OTP FOR LIFEEEEEEEE', 'PHAN DOMESTIC!!!!!' the chat reads, but neither of the boys are paying any attention to Phil's live stream. 

 "What are you thinking for food?" Phil asks, silently hoping for pizza. 

 "How's pizza?" Dan murmurs, and Phil can't help but smile affectionately at his boyfriend, "I really don't wanna cook."

 "Sounds good," Phil replies, trying to tune out the part of his head that hones in on the comments in the live stream about how he does anything Dan says. He's not a simp. He just likes to indulge his boyfriend after he's traversed half the world alone for the first time in 13 years. He wants Dan to feel loved, heard... safe. If that means that a handful of kids on the internet calls him #DanHowellsSlut, well that's on them. 

 "Text me what you want, and I will order so you can wrap up your stream!" Dan smiles, walking out of the living room and back into the office, watching the end of the stream.

 "Alright guys, I guess that means it's time for me to hop off here. For real this time. Danny boy gets fussy when he's not eating carbs." Phil chuckles at his own joke, saying bye to a few people in the crowd. "See you guys next week! Bye!" He signs off the live stream, falling back against the couch, and closing the lid of his MacBook with his foot. "Fuck..." he mumbles to no one in particular. Dan texts him, and he replies mindlessly, requesting the usual from Domino's. 

 "Daaaaan..." Phil calls, waiting for the man to reappear in the doorway.  

 "Yeah? You alright?" Dan pokes his head in, eyebrows pulled together in concern. They had just been texting, what was wrong that he felt like talking in person?

 "I... it's nothing." He shakes his head, deciding last minute not to bring it up to the other, "Want to watch a movie or something with our pizza?"

 "Sure. We should watch something old though, I don't really have the energy for something new."

 "How's Hunger Games? We both have seen that loads of times."

 "Perfect. Put it on then, I think the pizza is here." He rushes to the door, tipping the person and handing the boxes to Phil.  He collects the paper towels and glasses from the kitchen, sitting down on the turquoise couch next to his partner. "Lights on or off?"

 "How's lamplight?" Phil replies, distracted by the flatscreen across the room. He clicks on the movie, pushing his glasses up his nose as he grabs a slice of the pizza. Dan does the same, laying his legs across Phil's lap and watches the movie.

 After a few slices, Phil takes to scrolling Tumblr on his iPhone. He smiles at the screencaps from his liveshow, likes a couple of pieces of fanart of himself, and reblogs a couple of gifs for the gaming channel. 

Then it happens. 

 He hits a group of posts commenting on how whipped he is for Dan. How submissive he is, and how good he is for Dan. He can't help but scroll through the asks on the blog, reading about how he definitely almost called Dan "daddy" in a recent video. How he definitely wanted to kiss him at 12:23 in the newest gaming video... He sighs softly, turning back to the movie, just in time to see Katniss pick up her bow for the first time.

 Dan's fallen asleep by the time the credits roll. Phil can't help but smile at the man wrapped up in his pimp blanket and hugging the cloud pillow. He looks exhausted and a tiny part of his heart breaks for Dan. This is most likely the first good night's sleep he's had in weeks, and Phil can't bring himself to wake him. Carefully, he lifts Dan's socked feet off his thigh, sliding out from underneath him. Instead of turning on the next movie, he gathers the plates, cups, and paper towel roll in his arms, disappearing into the kitchen. Phil deposits the dishes in the sink, vowing to clean them tomorrow, and returns to the living room. He tiptoes past the younger man and cleans up the pizza and coke bottle, trying his hardest to avoid banging into the corner of the coffee table. Thankfully, he doesn't hit anything until he gets the pizza box into the fridge. He cringes, hoping Dan isn't awake. 

 "Alright, now to wake the baby..." he murmurs to himself, shutting off the light in the kitchen. He returns to the den and presses his lips to Dan's forehead. "Honey? We need to go to bed."      Dan crinkles his nose and groans, curling deeper into his ball of faux fur, "Nooooo... I wanna sleep here. 's cozy!" He hides his head under the blanket, attempting to fall back asleep. 

 "I know, Bear, but you'll be really sore if you don't go to bed. I love you, but I also know that you will complain all day about it." 

 "Gee, thanks, babe," Dan smirks, finally looking at his boyfriend. 

 "You know I'm right. Now, c'mon. You'll feel better." Phil reaches under the blanket, pulling Dan's hand until he finally obliges and stands up.

 Phil can't help but kiss his boyfriend's cheek. Somehow, even after thirteen years, he's the most handsome man he's ever met. Dan smirks sleepily, resting his head against Phil's shoulder as they stumble into the bedroom.

 He tries to sleep. Really, he does. Instead, though, his brain replays the posts, tweets, and messages haunting him for the last three weeks. They've gotten worse since Dan left for tour, it's like the posters have gotten bored and tried to stir up trouble. He presses his face to the pillow sighing deeply. Dan stirs in his sleep groaning softly. 

 "Whatever you're overthinking over there isn't worth it. It'll still be there in the morning. Go to sleep." The brunette murmurs, nuzzling into his side. They really do know each other inside and out. He nods and closes his eyes, pretending to sleep. 

 "G'morning," Dan mumbles, pressing into his side, making his hardon known. It's almost a ritual for them. If the weekday ends in y, Dan or Phil will push the other for morning sex. It's a given, almost like eating cereal for breakfast. Before he can reciprocate, though, Dan is staring at him. "I love you but you look like a dead man walking. So how about I take care of you this time, sir." Dan sits up, pulling his shirt over his head. 

 "Baby, you don't have to... I'm fine. It's not a big deal." Phil replies, hands finding their place on his waist.

 "Okay. What's actually wrong? You never turn down sex." Dan furrows his brow, brown eyes locking onto Phil's as though he can read his mind if stares hard enough.

 "I just don't feel up to it right now. I'm sorry." Phil gently presses a kiss to Dan's forehead. "I promise it's not you, I just got in my head last night. It's not important."

 "I understand that. It's easy to do. Would you like pancakes or cereal for breakfast?" 

 "Pancakes, of course," Phil replies, thankful for the change in subject. Dan climbs off the bed, ignoring his lack of shirt. "I'll be right there, baby. Don't start without me!"

 "No promises! I might eat them before you get in here!" Dan calls from the hallway, disappearing around the corner. Phil pulls his glasses on his face, making the bed and buying himself time. Just to allow his brain a second of clarity before he's met with the feeling of panic when Tumblr throws another post in his face. 

-_-_-_-_-_-_

 He makes it two weeks before he breaks. The duo had gotten back into their usual routine, reveling in the break in the chaos. Their livestreams were returning to normal and the whole debacle was behind him. Or so he thought. 

 Tonight's livestream was a joint event. Both men deciding it would be the perfect Christmas present for their fans. They answered questions and it all went smoothly until he sees it. He feels Dan go tense against his arm and Phil knows he saw it too. 

 A single message.

 Nine words.

 "Shout out the "Phil Lester Is A Sub Groupchat"!"

 "I think we should get indian food tonight, don't you agree? I want that vegetarian bowl I get every time. It just sounds amazing!!" Dan tries, covering the awkward silence.

  He takes that moment, disguising it as listening to the older's response, to take stock of the situation. There's a sense of panic in Phil's eyes. One so small only Dan knows what it looks like. He sees something else mixed in too, something he can't quite place. It's as though exhaustion and anger mixed together and created this new thing. He subtly gives Phil a nudge, three bumps on his right hip: 'check your face.' They'd implemented it after Dan rolled his eyes at something in the chat back in 2013. They decided it was best to avoid any issues. Phil blinks a few times, smiling quickly. 

 "That actually does sound amazing. I really am craving it too..." Phil replies quickly, changing the subject to what games they've been playing recently.

Twenty or so minutes later, Phil interjects, "Dang it Dan, I can't stop thinking about indian food now. But I swear we always abandon these guys for food."

 "I'm starving, guys. Soz." Dan laughs, "We can continue this video game discussion on Thursday on my livestream! For now though, bye guys!"

 "Bye!!" Phil clicks the button to end the stream and his shoulders drop. 

 "What was that about? You looked upset that someone called you a sub earlier."

 "I am, okay? It's been haunting me for almost a month now. I'm weirded out by the fact that people get the vibe off you that you're a dom or the sub vibe off of me. What does it matter to them?! What we do in our bedroom when the lights are off is between us."

 "Or inside us." Dan jests, attempting to break the tension. It works, causing Phil to burst into laughter.

 "Jesus Christ, Dannnnn." Phil scolds still smiling. "But no, it's been messing with my head all month. That's why I pushed you off the other day. I was inside my head about the idea that the fans think that you're in charge and when you offered to take the lead it panicked me a little. I was worried they saw something I didn't, and they knew something I hadn't. Like a joke I wasn't a part of." He sighs, scrubbing his palms over his eyes. "I just don't like not knowing."

 "Are you not happy being a dom? Do you not want to anymore?" Dan asks, eyes locked on the rip in the denim on his thigh. There's panic in his voice, and it breaks Phil's heart

 Phil sighs, raising Dan's chin, "Trust me, sweetheart, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I fucking love being your dom." 

 Dan's cheeks tint pink, shivering slightly, "If it makes you feel any better, I have been haunted by "#Danisadom" the entire tour. For some reason, our fans are very observant about everything else, but this is one area that they're completely oblivious to. This is #Philtops2k15 all over again. At least then they had it right..." Dan laughs lightly, hoping Phil will join in. 

 "I remember that! And you're right, we made it through that just like we will this. Because you're my baby, Bear. Nothing is going to change that." Phil kisses Dan gently. 

 "And you're my sir. But I need you to tell me when you start getting in your head again. Please tell me, Phil. I don't want you hurt." Dan replies, voice low. He presses kisses to Phil's jaw. Before they can get too heated, he pulls away, "We have a meeting in thirty minutes."

 "Wha? Dan!" Phil drops his arms to his sides, following the boy with his eyes as he disappears down the hall.

 "Don't tell me you forgot! You set the appointment!" Before he can inquire further, his phone dings with a notification on their shared calendar: 'collar appointment'. Dan's voice calls from down the hall, a smirk evident in the tone, "the cab will be here in fifteen. Better hurry if you want to change." The black-haired boy sighs, willing his semi to soften.

 "Fucking hell." He murmurs, rising from the couch to collect his jacket and wallet. "Dan, we have to make sure no one sees us." 

 "They won't, Phil. We made sure to get an appointment super fucking late. I promise no one will see us."

 "I know, but I don't want this to get out. I'm not ashamed of being your dom but I don't want the rest of the world to be yours as well. Yknow? I just fear that if they somehow figure out how to manipulate you, then it will become an issue, or the parents will insist we are shoving it down their precious darlings' throats..."

 "Phil," Dan touches his hands to the older's shoulders, pressing a kiss to his forehead, "It will be okay, I promise! If it makes you feel better, we can frame it differently." he leads them towards the door, out to where the cab is waiting, "Yknow? If we get caught, we can say we were collaring you." He whispers the last part against the shell of Phil's ear, breath ghosting across his cheek. 

 "No!!!" Phil whisper-shouts, "I hate you so much!" The two laugh it off, nervousness forgotten. 

Almost...

 The feeling of unease resurges when they arrive at the shop. "Dan, it's just here." He mumbles, motioning at the doorway. The other man turns back, having walked past it completely.

 Neither of the guys knew this place existed, but they'd passed it millions of times. It's a small shop on the west end with blackened windows and a subtle navy tint to the stucco. It blends in where you wouldn't notice it if you didn't look for it. 

 He pulls open the door, and the words "OWNED" catch the streetlight, dark lettering glinting. 

 Phil takes a deep breath, leading Dan inside. 

 When they enter, Phil isn't sure what he was scared of. From inside, you can barely see the streets, and the knowledge that no one else can see inside calms his soul. 

 Dan's in his element immediately. From the first second, he's holding Phil's hand, pointing at different materials, gemstones, and buckles. "Look at this one!"

 "Welcome in, you must be Mr. Lester and Mr. Howell! Pleased to meet you! My name is Gerald Rogers, I will be doing your sizing and fitting today." Both men shake Gerald's hand, their nervousness subsiding. "You guys seem nervous, is this your first collar?"

 "It is." Phil begins, wrapping his arm around Dan's hips, "We've talked about it a lot, but I decided it was the perfect Christmas present."

 "Well, we will be sure to find one that suits your dynamic perfectly. To start, let's have a seat back here so I can get a feel for your dynamic." The two men nod, following Gerald to the heavy black desk. 

 "Alright, let's start simple and work to the heavier details." The guys nod, and Dan takes Phil's hand. A silent testament that he's there and they're safe. "What are we thinking for the budget?" Phil replies with their budget and how flexible it is. Gerald begins typing on his laptop, nodding. "Who's going to be collared today?" Dan raises his hand, blush tinting his cheek. 

 "He is."

 "Perfect. And can you guys describe your dynamic?"

 "How do you mean?" Phil asks. 

 "I mean, what titles do you use, how hard is your play, do you tend to get rougher than most?" Gerald raises his eyebrows, hands poised over the keyboard.

 "Well, the titles we use most for Dan here are 'baby, honey, sweetheart....' The soft stuff. And then for me--"

 "I use "Sir" more than anything. We do joke around with 'daddy' but I don't really want that included this time." Gerald nods, updating his notes. He smiles encouragingly, waiting for the boys to continue.

 "Are you wanting to have an all-the-time collar or just a play collar?"

 "We are definitely looking for just a play collar. Our fans wouldn't take kindly to Dan suddenly wearing a heavy collar." Phil laughs lightly. 

 "Fans?" Gerald asks, casually.

 "We're YouTubers. I presume you won't release to our fans what we're up to? Our relationship is kind of a personal secret they aren't aware of."

 "I promise, discretion is one of the main things I promise with my services."

 "Perfect," Dan states, hand squeezing Phil's.

 "And are you two rough with your play? I don't mean physically, I mean are you guys planning on attaching leashes, pulling on the collar, or leading by it?"

 "We were planning to try implementing it, does the collar hold up to that?"

 "Oh, easily. We can do a double-layered flat leather collar with reinforced D rings."

 "Perfect." Phil smiles.

 "Great, let's get you measured Dan!" He nods, nervousness in his eyes. 

 "It's gonna be okay, babe." Phil smiles, reassuringly. "I'm right here." Gerald raises the tape measure, and Dan nods. "Don't flinch, it's okay. I'm right here." 

 "Alright, I've got the measurements." Gerald smiles, writing the numbers on his computer, "I'm guessing you are someone who hates people touching their neck?" Dan nods, never breaking eye contact with his boyfriend, "You did great."

 "You really did, Dan." Phil praises, reveling in the way he minutely preens. 

 "Alright. what materials and colors were you thinking of doing this time?"

 "We had been discussing doing a double-layered vegan leather collar in black and white." 

 "Are you thinking 12 millimeters or more?"

 "Ah, definitely 12 millimeters... I think that's right. The site we were looking at said half an inch was ideal for a first hard-play collar." Dan looks at the measurement sheet in front of him, reading the numbers off internally. "I don't want anything too strong around my neck." 

 "Then that would probably be right around perfect... Let me get something drawn up for you. Wait here." Gerald walks into the back room, leaving the boys to their own devices.

 "I'm really happy we're finally doing this." Phil murmurs. 

 "I am too. I like my collar, but one from the pet shop doesn't work well for us. It'll be nice to have one made special and not for a dog."

 "Agreed. Did you want to go for a locking collar, baby?" 

 "I would be honored." Dan blushes, "But we can't lose the key or forget it's on."

 "Oh, I don't think that will be a problem for you two." Gerald interrupts, presenting his sketch. 

 The piece on the iPad in front of them is perfect. It looks like someone took the essence of Dan and created it. The thick black leather is sewn with white thread and the thin leather on top is sewn with black. There are three sets of eight rivets surrounding three D rings, and Dan can almost feel the black chains ghosting across his collarbones and back. "It's perfect..." He whispers, awestruck. 

 "I'm glad you think so! Is there anything you'd like to add or modify?"

 "Can we possibly add in a few gemstones? Like maybe black gems here and here?" Phil points between the D rings, smiling awkwardly. 

 "Like... this?" Gerald adds the gems, turning it back. "And were you two considering a locking or belt-style clasp?"

 "Locking. Can we get two sets of keys though?"

 "Absolutely, that is a default for these collections, just in case one set gets separated. I will make a note on your order though just to be sure." He types it in, "I will have your piece ready in about two weeks." He smiles and clears the approval, having both of the men sign the agreement before reading out their total.

 "That is perfect. Thank you so much." Phil smiles, handing Gerald his card. 

-_-_-_-_-_-_

 Back home, Dan can't keep his hands off of Phil. "What's up? You were trying to hold my hand in the cab, you've been glued to my side since we got home. Is something wrong? Are you having second thoughts about your collar?"

 "No! I mean, no. I'm nervous but I'm not regretting it." Dan blushes, leaning against the counter, watching Phil eat cereal from the box, "If anything, I am excited." I can't wait to have something that symbolizes how much you want me to be yours. It's an honor that you want to collar me, Phil. I mean, what did I do to deserve this?"

 "You existed, Dan. That's all that matters. You were deserving of it from the beginning, no one has noticed before me. I have wanted to collar you since 2010, but I didn't want to scare you off. Some people classify this as more important than a wedding ring. I mean, you are literally allowing me to put a lock around your neck. My love, you are the most worthy of anyone I have ever known or dated. I can't imagine anyone else would rather be mine than you. You're my world! I--" Before Phil can finish rambling Dan is pressing their mouths together. 

 "Fuck I have wanted to do that since we left Owned." He reconnects their lips and the quiet groan from Phil reverberates through him. He replies with the softest squeak, and most people would have missed it, but Phil catches it. 

 "If I had known that getting you fitted would have this effect on you, I'd have done it ages ago!"

 "Oh shut up you spoon." Dan blushes, wriggling away from the older. 

 "Never," Phil replies, smirking. Dan glares playfully, disappearing into the living room.    -_-_-_-_-_-_

 Dan has been dreading this. It's finally Tuesday and he hasn't even said hello before he sees it:

"Hi, Daddy." 

 Dan can't help but freeze in his tracks, slipping before he can school his expression. He glares at the message. He hopes no one sees the look, but the chat's speed says otherwise. He doesn't know why it affects him so much. Neither of them has used that title since 2010. But yet it still haunts him. 

 Because it's not him. 

 "Have you guys tried any new shows this week? Phil and I-- ope!! Phil and I!" He snaps his fingers and laughs, "We've been watching a new anime! I can't remember the name though!" He deflects the chat, ignoring the comments in chat asking about his sex life with Phil.

 "Da-an!" Phil calls from the hallway, walking in with a black cardboard box. 

 "Oh! Phil! I was just getting ready to call you!" 

 "You were?" He walks in, box still in hand, leaning down next to his partner. 

 "I was trying to tell these guys about that new anime we started! What was it called?"

 "Oh, it was an old one I watched when I was younger. Vampire Knight?" The chat explodes in reply, half of them asking about the show and the other asking about the box in his hand. 

 "It's fun. Definitely a teen drama though. which I think makes it funnier. Cuz we're two grown-ass men watching a romance anime made for teenage girls." The two talk a bit more about the show before Phil comes up with an excuse to leave. 

 "Alright, now. Where were we?" Dan asks, "I have the memory of a gnat I swear to gods... Oh! The new album! So..." His phone dings somewhere in the middle of the discussion and he wishes he'd put it on silent. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees a text:

Sir-- 9:08: It's here. 9:09: On the counter in the kitchen, I won't unbox it without you.  

 He almost whimpers, excitement settling into his body. "Well, I think I need to head out and finish editing the new video for you guys! Hopefully, I can have it out for you in the next six months!" He laughs, waving to the camera, "Bye guys! Talk to you all next week!"

 He clicks end live, rushing out of the room. "Where is it?" He calls, words running together with excitement.

 "It's right here! I told you I had it! I even showed you the box!" Phil laughs, pushing the box closer to the younger. "I haven't opened it. Do you need a knife?" Dan nods, cutting the box open. 

 Inside the box, wrapped in red tissue paper is a satin pouch. Neither of the boys can do anything but gape at first, shocked that it's actually real and in their hands. Finally, Phil comes to his senses and lifts the satin out of the box, untying the ribbon. 

 "I-- it's real," Dan whispers when the leather piece has been revealed. The chains softly tink together, and the loop for the lock at the back waits expectantly. His hands shake gently as Phil raises the leather, eyes meeting Dan's.

 "It-- It's--"

 "Perfect." Dan finishes his thought, breath coming in short gasps. He touches his fingers to the D-rings, blinking slowly. 

 Phil can't help but smile at the awestruck look on Dan's face, "Wanna put it on now? I mean, we are done for the night. Might as well test and make sure it fits." The boy nods, nervously. 

 "Alright. How should we go about doing this? Should I get on my knees or..."

 "Just like we always do, bear. This is just another one of our collars. Hold still and I'll help you put it on." He turns around, back to Phil's chest, and digs in the box for the padlock. Dan grabs it, holding it in his hand, waiting for the feeling of the vegan leather on his throat. He hands the lock to Phil when he finally gets it into place, hearing the click when it's finally done. 

 "How does it look?" Dan asks, turning back to face Phil. The older doesn't reply, eyes wide and pupils blown. 

 "Holy fuck..." He whispers, causing Dan to blink rapidly.

 "That bad?" Dan asks, hands reaching for the band. He grows self-conscious, confusion evident in his expression. 

 "N-no... No. Quite the opposite, actually. You look amazing, Dan." Phil blushes slightly, "Could you imagine wearing this in a video? They'd die."

 "Because the one they thought was the dom is in a collar?"

 "No. Because this may actually be one of the top ten sexiest things I have ever seen you in." Dan looks down at his loose t-shirt and joggers, raising an eyebrow.

 "This? Phil, I wear this every day. They're literally my pajamas."

 "No, I mean this." Phil laces his fingers under the collar, gently pulling Dan against him. "This is the sexiest thing you've ever worn. Probably up there with that one time, you dressed as me for Dailybooth."

 "That was one of the first times you said you wanted to collar me." He blushes at the memory, remembering just how hoarse he was the next day. 

 "I know. And now look at you... All locked up and nowhere to go..." Phil's voice lowers, sending a shiver up Dan's spine. He presses their lips together, never letting go of the younger's collar. "What do you want to do, Daniel? Shall we break in this new toy?" Dan nods, mutely. "Alright. I want you on my bed ready in two minutes."

 "Yes, sir. The same stuff as always?" Phil nods, turning back to the box. He digs through the paper, finding the second set of keys. He takes stock of the situation, wondering if this is a new chapter in their BDSM journey. Sure, they've had collars before, but nothing like this.

 He thinks back to the time when Dan had asked for a stronger pair of cuffs. He remembers how he wondered then if this would be a new normal for them. 

 Before he can answer his question, Dan calls from the other room, "You comin' or what?" 

 Phil laughs breathily to himself, walking quickly down the hallway. "I'm comin', baby, don't get impatient on me or I'll make you wait."

 "Yes, sir." Dan murmurs. 

 Phil opens the door, breathlessly. Before him is his boyfriend of 13 years waiting expectantly, eyes trained forward and collar around his neck. He's taken off every thread of clothing, and the blush on his skin catches the streetlight out the window perfectly. 

 "Fuck you're going to kill me, Bear," Phil whispers unbuttoning his corgi shirt as he closes the door. 

 Phil approaches him, connecting their lips. Dan whines, hoping and praying Phil would let him do something, anything to get the friction he craves. Instead of indulging, Phil takes his hand, leads him to the bed, and pushes him back onto the colorful bedsheets. "What do you want?"

 "I want you!" He gasps in reply, brown eyes blown wide in desperation. "Please, I just want your cock." 

 "Aww, desperate already?" Phil growls dominantly, "Pathetic, aren't you." 

 Dan watches as Phil unzips his black jeans, waiting for the man to reveal what Dan's been waiting for, "C'moooooooon" 

 Phil glares, abandoning the buttons and instead sliding his fingers underneath the edge of the collar, pulling it up. "I know you're desperate, but you need to remember who's in charge here. I know our fans think it's you, but you and I both know the truth. We're going to try this again, who's in charge, Daniel?"

 Dan nods, "Y-you are, sir." 

 Phil preens at his reply, pushing his jeans off his legs. He grants himself a couple strokes before pulling Dan in closer. "Good boy. What do you want, bear?" Dan blinks, silently communicating with his boyfriend. Phil nods, tangling his fingers in Dan's curls.

 Dan blushes, licking Phil's tip. "Can you... Y'know..." He looks up at Phil, expectantly. 

 "Aww, want me to fuck your face?" Dan nods, parting his lips. Phil pushes his length into Dan's mouth, pausing briefly at the base, the feeling of his tongue too much to handle. "Fuck," He groans and resists the urge to jerk his hips. 

 Dan blushes, talking as best he can around the intrusion. Phil smirks and tangles his fingers in Dan's hair, pulling his head back to meet the base of his cock. 

 "That's a good boy, c'mon, take it all." Dan whimpers, suckling at the older's cock. "You're doing so good baby, I'm gonna cum though if we aren't careful..."

 Dan pulls back, wiping his mouth, "W-want you to fuck me... Please?" Dan whispers gaze downcast towards his knees. 

  Phil smirks in victory. His usually articulate boyfriend has been brought to his knees, begging for any attention the older will grant. Phil growls, lifting Dan's chin to meet his gaze. His lips are parted, breaths escaping in short pants. "I would love to do that, sweetheart," Phil replies hotly, "Let's get into it then." He scoots back on the bed, "Did you stretch earlier like I told you too?" 

 Dan nods, handing the older a well-used bottle of lube, "Mhm, but you might need to check."

 "If I didn't know better, I'd think you wanted me to finger you," Phil smirks, spreading lube over two fingers and pressing them to Dan's entrance. When they go in easily, he presses into Dan's prostate. 

 "I know noth-- Oh fuuuuck," Dan moans, pushing his hips backwards. Phil smirks, adding a third finger.

 "You know nothing? You're right. You're just a pretty slut. Made perfect for my dick." Phil pulls his fingers out, wiping the excess on his leg. He spreads more lube on his cock, pressing into the younger. "Beg for it."

 "Please?" Dan begs, head dropping. "I've been waiting for this all day, sir. Please..." 

 Phil pushes the tip in, and pauses. "I didn't tell you to stop." 

 Dan attempts to push his hips back, mewling. "Please, sir... Please please please..." He curls his nails into the sheets, curls falling across his face. 

 The older shakes his head affectionately, pushing in the rest of the way. "Taking my cock so well, bear. You're such a good little slut for me. Take it all." He tangles his fingers into the back of the collar, using it to gain leverage. "Fuck..." Phil moans, speeding up his thrusts. 

 Dan tangles his hands into the sheets, groaning loudly. "Please, Please, please... I'm so close please..."

 "Good." Phil's thrusts grow rougher, as he bites Dan's shoulder. "Don't cum until I tell you to." 

 The sound of their bodies colliding causes Dan to tremble. "Please... Please.... Sir... Lemme cum please!" 

 "Fuck, Dan... I'm so close... Ready?" he nods, desperately, "Okay... Cum for me. Right now, baby, I'm right behind you." Phil groans roughly, feeling Dan squeeze around him, pushing him over the edge. He reaches around, giving Dan's leaking cock a few strokes, helping him through his orgasm. "Good boy... You did so good." He whispers, letting go of the collar and pulling out of the younger. 

 "I love you so much, Dan." Phil whispers, pressing a kiss to Dan's nose. "You did so good."    "I love you too. Thank you." he replies, dazed.

 "For what?"

 "Loving me, and for collaring me." 

 "Of course. Just proof your mine forever baby bear." 

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed!! Likes and reblogs are much appreciated!!

[lilpunkrock]

where you go (I will go) - bonus content #2

Hello and Happy Valentine’s Day, friends! In honor of the day of love, here’s another piece of WYGIWG bonus content. 🤍 Beware, spoilers lie below the line break!

series masterlist

Top 10 Dream & Love/Reader Moments

(In chronological order because I can’t rank my children, lol)

1. Part ii - Dream and Love’s First Meeting.

This is definitely a Top 10 moment. I remember being so excited to write Dream for the first time and to describe him through Love/Reader’s eyes. Establishing their relationship (especially Love’s habit of challenging Dream), writing their first little bit of “tension,” and then adding the abrupt end was so much fun for me.

2. Part iii - A Day in the Life of Love

This was another favorite early on. This chapter was entirely dedicated to establishing Dream/Love’s dynamic and revealing the inner workings of Love’s world, and I adored every second of it. Writing Dream’s obvious surprise at Love’s passion for simple pleasures (coffee and earl grey, anyone?) and his (thinly veiled) interest in her function were opportunities to show off Dream’s curious nature. I also loved writing the opening scene of him showing up in her room unannounced, reading a novel, with no regard for her personal space. To me, this emphasized just how otherworldly Dream is, particularly in comparison to how strongly Love clings to her past as a mortal.

3. Part viii - Dream Gives Love the Pouch of Sand

This gift from the Dream Lord was something I was really looking forward to. It definitely signals a turning point and a big step for our Dream Lord. Dream’s downplaying of how thoughtful it was for him to introduce Love to Hob is 100% thick-headed, pulled-the-wool-over-his-own-eyes Dream material. Also, this scene gives us the first time that Love refers to the Dream Lord as “Dream.” Up until this point, it had been Dream Lord, Lord Morpheus, Morpheus - another subtle but significant development!

4. Part ix - The Whole Dang Chapter

This is one of my all-time favorites of this series. I was so excited to finally put together all the pieces and reveal Love’s complete past to the reader. I was even more excited to write Love journeying to the Dreaming for comfort and finding solace in our Dream Lord. This chapter has our first truly voluntary touch by both parties (When you slip your fingers into the palm of his waiting hand, you’re surprised at the smoothness you find there. Soft as silk.) I was also dying to finally write from Dream’s perspective in this chapter. His evident desperation to gain answers about Love’s past without really knowing (or at least being able to admit to himself) WHY he wanted to know – so fun. Plus, their attachments start forming! So much going on in this chapter.

5. Part x - Love’s Grapples with the Fall

On a deep note, I adored exploring Love’s difficulty grappling with her feelings for Dream in this chapter. Getting to see how her past impacts her current decisions and how it cultivated this strong sense of hesitancy to fall in love out of self-preservation… this was a blast. On a more light-hearted note, writing the scenes where Love begins to notice little things about Dream that she didn’t before, her nervousness in his presence, all her little “simping” moments were SO MUCH FUN, AH.

6. Part xii - Love Submits to the Truth

Writing the scene where Love visits Dream unseen in his throne room was one I was looking forward to for a long time. There was a sweet surrender to this scene – the simple pleasure of being able to really look at him, unabashed and unashamed; admitting his beauty to herself; submitting to the truth of her feelings. That moment where you see someone you care about in a different light for the very first time, where you realize that what you’ve been feeling is actually love… This experience is one I’ve actually lived out in my own life, so writing this scene was very special to me.

7. Part xiii - Protective Dream + “I Remember You”

I mean, need I say more? Getting to finally write Protective Dream was SUCH a huge payoff. I’ve always subscribed to the concept that Dream is not unfeeling; rather, he almost feels too much, and must contain it for the sake of his function. Getting to open the floodgates a bit in this chapter was a thrill. Also, the realization that a part of Dream remembered Love, had always remembered Love, had been aware of her removal from the Dreaming on the night of her murder, and Love’s “Please don’t tell me that, Dream” that followed after his confession – *screams internally*

8. Part xiv - THE Dream and The Break-Up

The “dream” scene where Love and Dream finally give in to their feelings was actually the first scene I ever wrote for this story. Needless to say, the buildup was LONG. Finally getting to write these two lovebirds having a happy moment and opening up to one another gave me all the feels. The exchange of vows!! And then, of course, we had the whiplash of Love declaring her need to stay away from Dream later in the chapter. One love interest lying about their feelings to protect the other love interest is a hill I WILL die on.

9. Part xvi - The Sacrifice

Because I’m a sucker for some good old heart-stopping, gut-wrenching, knock-the-wind-out-of-you angst. This part had it all - Love missing Dream while in the Garden of Forking Ways, Love finally harnessing the full potential of her function, and then the ultimate sacrifice. I remember being so nervous to write this chapter, as it felt the entire story was riding on its shoulders. Dream learning of their attachments, Love’s acceptance of her fate knowing that it was worth it to protect Dream, her admitting her feelings, Dream promising to “find her” – it all set us up for our final chapters.

10. Interlude – Dream’s Vow

Honestly, any time I got to write for Dream was a major highlight for me in this story. Definitely planning on writing a one-shot entirely from Dream’s POV after the story is over. Describing the aftermath of Love’s sacrifice from Dream’s point of view, his utter devotion, his utter destruction – oof, it was a doozy. The angst was rough, but it all set us up for that final line – “And, in that moment, Dream of the Endless knows.”

Bonus: Any dock scene/”Twenty Questions” scene. I love writing for these two dorks. Enough said.

What are some of your favorite moments from WYGIWG? I’d love to hear them in the comments! 🤍