#you can just be. be without definition. be without limit. be without labels.

[katsdynam1ght]

i was going to make some post talking about sexuality and queerness, but i decided that’s way too much work. in truth, i don’t care about sexuality. not even a little bit.

you want to know what’s really attractive to me? passion. fervor. determination. willpower. women or men i can go either way but someone with a brain and drive? there is nothing more appealing to me than ambition—someone who knows what they want and will fight for it with everything they have. that fighting doesn’t have to be in response to a threat or fear, just… the desire to obtain, y’know? to achieve, accomplish, whatever. to get what they want. that’s the most attractive thing in the world.

and yes, this says a lot about the characters i’m drawn to as well—i am a very passionate person myself. i have a lot of strong opinions and i do not bend easily. i take a lot of time to think about things, but once i make a decision or set a goal, i stick by that and i work toward whatever it is that i want. this is a quality i appreciate in myself and something that is unbelievably appealing when i see it in other people.

“ok kats, what’s the point of this post?”

full transparency? there’s not one. i don’t know. maybe i’m just telling you that it doesn’t matter how you look or how you dress or what your gender is or your aesthetic and maybe your identity is completely irrelevant as a whole. i’m not saying this to invalidate anybody but i am saying sometimes i think we focus too much on what we are and not who.

let me just say it plainly—the what doesn’t matter so much. but are you fierce? are you loyal? are you shy? are you strong? do you endure quietly or do you fight loudly? have you ever given up? will you try again? do you stand by your beliefs or is performative activism enough? how hard will you work for what you want? are you empathetic? are you kind? how much love do you have for those you don’t like?

and i don’t say any of this to judge anyone, because whoever you are, whatever qualities you have, the only person that should matter to is you. you decide who you want to be, now and always. you are not a fixed entity set in stone—you are malleable; you can change. if you haven’t yet succeeded at developing a trait you want to have, that doesn’t mean you can’t continue to try.

or you don’t have to listen to me at all. i’m just a stranger online. nothing i say really matters, and that’s fine—that’s how it should be. but give it a thought or two, maybe. all i’m saying is that i think people will be drawn to you based on who you are, not necessarily what.

[mariasont]

Early seasons Spencer’s gf joining the team and quickly realizing just how used to Spencer she is bc the rest of the team’s reactions to him are so different from hers

Cinnamon Sticks - S.R

a/n: obsessed with the idea of baby spencie having a gf who just gets him while he's still an awkward, nerdy little genius! thanks for requesting bestie so sorry it took so long i am the worst LOL

masterlist

pairings: early!seasons!spencer reid x fem!reader

warnings: established relationship, secret relationship, relationship being exposed bc these two are just so in love

wc: 1.7k

Garcia burst into the bullpen like some sort of whirlwind that was practically painted in neon, her scarf fluttering behind her almost like a cape. She juggled a precariously full cup of coffee, while her phone teetered between ear and shoulder as if testing the limits of human dexterity.

"I swear to all that is holy, if my life doesn't slow down in the next five minutes —"

The sentence derailed as she misjudged her pace, the coffee sloshing dangerously close to the rim of the cup. She stopped abruptly, but not quick enough to stop the scalding liquid from spilling over and searing her fingers.

"Oh, fantastic! Just what I needed!" she huffed, waving her hand like it might stop the sting.

She threw herself into the closest chair with a dejected sigh, slumping back and fixing the coffee cup with a murderous glare, like this was just another tally in a long line of grievances.

Your eyes darted up from your work, only for a moment, enough to confirm what you already knew. You hadn't been working here long, but it was long enough to recognize the phenomenon that was Garcia: a blur of movement and words, mid-rant before anyone had the chance to catch up. It was like clockwork really.

You risked a glance across the desk at Spencer, who was so absorbed in his notebook it was a wonder he even remembered to breathe. If Garcia's antics registered as white noise to anyone, it was him. But then, almost like he had a radar for being watched, he looked up, catching your gaze.

His eyebrows lifted into a subtle what can you do? expression, and you couldn't help but smile back.

That was the thing about Spencer. He had this uncanny knack for knowing exactly what you were thinking, almost as if he had a cheat sheet for your brain. And maybe he did, like his brain worked three times faster than everyone else's in the room (which, let's face it, it definitely did). But instead of that being intimidating, it was oddly reassuring.

"At this rate, I'm one bad email away from alphabetizing my entire pantry for stress relief."

Spencer's notebook hit the desk, and there it was, the shift you loved to look for. His shoulders drew back, face lighting up, the kind of thing that signaled his mini-lecture was incoming.

"Organizing your pantry is actually a practical stress management technique. By categorizing items, you create a structured environment that reduces decision fatigue. Its why people feel calmer in tidy spaces, it's psychological."

Morgan held up a hand. "Psychological, huh? Sounds like you’re just trying to justify your weird love affair with labels, pretty boy.”

“Don’t forget,” you added absently, flipping a page in your report, “it also saves time when you’re cooking. I think you called it practical efficiency."

The words slipped out without much thought, but as soon as they did, the bullpen stilled. You glanced up, heart sinking as you saw every face turned in your direction.

Morgan’s grin was the first thing you notice, wide and knowing, stretching across his face. He tilted his head, eyes bouncing between you and Spencer like he was putting pieces together in real time.

“Wait a minute,” he said, sitting forward with a gleam in his eye. “Did you just quote him? Like, word for word?”

Your cheeks heated instantly. “What? No. I mean — maybe. I don’t know.”

“Pretty sure you did,” Morgan shot back, smirking. “Man, what else has he been teaching you? You got the periodic table memorized too?”

You rolled your eyes, leaning back in your chair. “Oh, please. If you’ve been around Spencer long enough, you’re bound to pick up a few things. He’s like a walking encyclopedia.”

“Well,” Spencer said, his head tilting slightly as he spoke, “your cinnamon sticks always end up at the back of your pantry. That’s why I figured you might appreciate the idea of organizing by use frequency. Like I said, practical efficiency.”

The moment the words left his mouth, you knew he’d made a tactical error.

Garcia gasped, her eyes lighting up like she’d just been handed the juiciest piece of gossip of her life. 

“Oh. My. God. Spencer Reid, how exactly do you know what the back of her pantry looks like?”

You froze, rooted to the spot as the realization hit you like a cartoon anvil. 

This was bad.

Spencer’s expression mirrored yours for half a second, bug-eyed panic, but he quickly scrambled for an answer. 

“It’s, um… a logical assumption,” he stammered, his fingers toying with the pen in his hand, a nervous tell he couldn’t quite suppress. “Spices like cinnamon sticks always seem to migrate to the back of the pantry unless there’s an intentional system in place.”

Morgan let out a long, low whistle, rocking back in his chair with enough force to make it creak.

“Nice save. But I don’t think Garcia’s buying it.”

Garcia tapped her chin, clearly enjoying herself far too much. “Oh, no, no, no. This is too good. I mean, logical assumption  my fabulous behind! Cinnamon sticks in the back of her pantry? Really? What’s next? A detailed analysis of how she stacks her cereal boxes?”

You laughed, though it sounded more like a bark than anything natural. “You’re all reading way too much into this. Spencer just knows weirdly specific things about, well, everything. That’s kind of his thing, remember?”

“Mmhmm,” Garcia hummed, clearly unconvinced. “Alright, genius, I’ll let it slide this time. But I’m watching you.”

“Please don’t,” Spencer muttered under his breath, earning a round of laughter from the team.

Garcia spent a solid ten minutes in full interrogation mode after that, her eyes narrowing with each and every pointed question she lobbed your way. Morgan, of course, was no help. He leaned back, grinning like a kid with a front-row seat to the circus, his smirk practically screaming that he knew they were this close to striking a nerve.

Spencer and you had been so careful. You'd been dating long before you joined the BAU, but the moment Hotch had called to offer you the position, you both knew you'd have to keep things under wraps. Dating a coworker was one thing; dating Spencer Reid, a genius with an accidentally too-honest mouth, was an entirely different challenge.

You hadn't expected it to be this hard, though. Keeping the secret wasn't the worst part, it was pretending he wasn't the center of your universe every time you walked into the room. It was keeping your hands to yourself when all you wanted to do was smooth out the messy strands of hair that always fell into his eyes. It was biting your tongue when someone interrupted his long-winded tangents because the truth was, you loved hearing him talk.

The hours stretched on, and the bullpen slowly thinned out. Garcia was the first to leave, blowing a kiss to the room. Morgan left soon after, pausing to flash you one last grin before disappearing. Even Prentiss packed up for the night, muttering something about needed an extra shot of espresso tomorrow morning.

"You handled that well."

You looked up from your report to find Spencer by your desk, one hand tucked into his pocket, the other skimming lightly along the edge of the divider. His expression was surprisingly soft, almost bashful, as though he had been waiting to get you alone.

"Handled that well?" you repeated, raising an eyebrow. "You were the one who almost blew it, Spencer. Cinnamon sticks? Really?"

He smiled, lips twitching upward as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "Okay, I'll admit that wasn't my most subtle moment. But in my defense, they do end up at the back of most pantries."

You couldn't help but laugh, shaking your head as you leaned back in your chair. 

"We're lucky Garcia got distracted. If she'd pushed any harder..." Your voice drifted into a soft sigh. "That could've been bad."

"That was a close one."

The quiet that followed wasn't uncomfortable, but it felt a little more substantial, if that was the word, filled with that miniscule ache that always bloomed in your chest when he was near. 

Spencer stepped closer, his hand brushing against the edge of your desk. His body angled toward you, like even when you weren’t touching, he couldn’t help but gravitate toward you.

“You know,” he said, his voice softer now, “I don’t think she actually suspects anything. But we should probably be more careful.”

"Probably," you replied, drawing out the word in a teasing, sing-song tone. “Unless you’d rather keep showing off how ridiculously well you know me.”

His cheeks flushed a soft pink, but he didn’t look away. Instead, that shy, boyish smile, the one that always made you a little breathless, spread across his lips.

"That's going to be hard," he admitted, voice barely above a whisper. "I noticed a lot about you."

You could feel the flush creeping up to your neck, and you mentally cursed him for how easily he was able to do this to you.

"You're lucky I like you."

His smile widened, and his eyes crinkled at the corners in that way they only came out at specific moments. Like when he successfully performed a card trick for the team or when he stumbled across an original copy of a book at a library sale. 

The same one you'd seen when he talked about his mom on her good days, or when you asked him on a date. 

You leaned forward. "And since I like you, any chance you'd want to kiss me right now?"

"How could I not, with you looking at me like that?"

The angle was clumsy, your chair too low, his frame leaning awkwardly over, but all of that melted away the second his hands found your face. His thumbs brushed soft circles against the place where your cheek met your jaw.

His lips were soft against yours at first, testing, before growing firmer, more sure. The kind of confidence that came with a hundred familiar kisses before. 

Time seemed to slow, or at least for you it did, the rest of the world nonexistent.

The sound of a throat clearing broke the spell, and you jerked back from Spencer, your chair wobbling slightly as you turned toward the sound. You immediately regretted it — your lips felt swollen, your face hot, and there was Prentiss, leaning against the doorframe.

"We were... uh, testing something," you blurted, avidly avoiding eye contact. "You know, like... oxygen exchange! For scientific purposes."

Spencer blinked, then mumbled, "Oxygen exchange? That's the best you got?"

"Shut it," you hissed through gritted teeth, not daring to look at him.

Prentiss arched a brow. "Relax, lovebirds. If this is your idea of scientific research, I'll make sure Garcia doesn't find out. You're welcome."

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[txrully]

I'M SO STUPID IN LOVE!

·˚ ༘ ꒱ summary lovey-dovey things they'd do for you!

·˚ ༘ ꒱ characters isagi yoichi , bachira meguru , itoshi rin , nagi seishiro , mikage reo , chigiri hyoma , hiori yo , shidou ryusei , itoshi sae , michael kaiser , alexis ness .

·˚ ༘ ꒱ warning lowercase intended

·˚ ༘ ꒱ song inspo stupid in love - max ( ft. huh yunjin of lsrfm )

·˚ ༘ ꒱ isagi yoichi

you know how isagi’s brain is basically soccer, soccer, soccer? well, this man rewires his ENTIRE system for you. suddenly, every time he scores a goal, he dedicates it to you. like, mid-celebration he’s shouting your name in front of thousands of people. embarrassing? a lil. cute? definitely.

he’s also the type to leave you notes everywhere. you’ll open your locker, and boom: "i hope your day is as perfect as your smile. also, pls drink water. - yoichi 🩵"

or you’ll find random sticky notes around the house with stuff like: "you're cuter than my dog. and that’s saying a lot." ( i hc he's a dog person, fight me 🫠 )

"yoichi, did you seriously compare me to your dog again?"

"is that bad?? you’re both my top priorities!"

·˚ ༘ ꒱ bachira meguru

bachira is a walking ball of chaos, and it only gets worse when he’s in love. he makes you weird handmade crafts—like a necklace with your initials carved into a random rock he found because “the vibes were immaculate.”

he’s also the king of grand gestures. once, he showed up outside your window in the middle of the night blasting your favorite song from a boombox. and no, he didn’t think it through—he got yelled at by your neighbors, but he swears it was worth it.

"meguru, why is there a rock with my name on it?"

"because i love you. duh."

"…you couldn’t just buy a necklace??"

"where’s the FUN in that?? D:< "

·˚ ༘ ꒱ itoshi rin

soft tsundere energy incoming. rin doesn’t say much, but when he’s in love, he SHOWS it. like, he’ll memorize your coffee order, your favorite book, and the exact way you like your hoodie sleeves rolled up. you swear he’s psychic, but he’s just that attentive.

he also sends you texts at random times:

"don’t forget your umbrella. it’s going to rain."

"i noticed you like this song. added it to my playlist."

you’re 99% sure his search history is “how to take care of someone without being obvious.”

"rin, did you... did you learn how to make my favorite food?"

"shut up and eat it."

"you’re so sweet it’s disgusting."

"i said shut up."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ nagi seishiro

nagi’s love language? pure, lazy dedication. he may not seem like the romantic type, but trust me—he will move mountains for you... as long as it doesn’t require getting up too much.

once, he spent HOURS figuring out how to build you a playlist of all your favorite songs, complete with a cover photo of you two. he even labeled it: "for my player 2 🕹️"

"sei, this playlist is amazing!"

"mm, yeah, it was exhausting. now can we nap?"

"you literally just sat there and clicked buttons."

"exactly. so tiring.."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ mikage reo

reo goes all out for you—no budget, no limits, no second thoughts. one time, you mentioned how pretty cherry blossoms are, and the next thing you know, he’s flying you to a festival in japan. casually might i add.

but the sweetest part? he remembers the little things. your favorite snack? stocked in his pantry. your favorite flower? delivered to your doorstep every friday. he spoils you rotten but somehow makes it feel like the most natural thing in the world.

"reo, this is too much—"

"no, it’s not. nothing’s too much for you."

"you’re literally insane."

"only for you, babe."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ chigiri hyoma

chigiri is the definition of 💌romantic aesthetic💌. he writes you poetry and leaves it in random places, like your bag or your coat pocket. sometimes, you don’t even notice until hours later.

he also takes you on dreamy dates—picnics in scenic fields, long bike rides at sunset, and slow dances in your living room when it’s raining outside. everything he does feels like it’s straight out of a romance movie.

"hyoma, did you just quote a shakespeare sonnet to me?"

"maybe."

"oh my god, you’re so dramatic."

"and yet you’re still here."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ hiori yo

hiori is the sweetest, softest boy in love. he keeps a journal where he writes down all the little things you do that make him happy. once, you caught him scribbling, and he turned BRIGHT red.

he’s also the king of quiet acts of service. your phone’s always fully charged, your favorite snacks magically appear in your bag, and you never have to ask for help because he’s already two steps ahead.

"yo, were you writing about me again?"

"no... maybe. okay, yes."

"you’re adorable."

"please don’t look."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ shidou ryusei

oh boy. shidou is CHAOTIC in love. this man would probably fight a wild animal to impress you. he’s all about making you laugh, even if it means doing the dumbest stunts imaginable.

one time, he literally climbed a tree to get you a flower. it wasn’t even a nice flower. but hey, it’s the thought that counts.

"ryu, you’re bleeding. what did you do??"

"got you this flower. cool, huh?"

"you FELL OUT OF A TREE FOR THIS??"

"worth it."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ itoshi sae

sae is the definition of quiet but deadly romantic. he doesn’t show his feelings often, but when he does? damn. like, he’ll casually fly in from another country just to spend the weekend with you because “it’s no big deal.”

he also sends you fancy gifts out of nowhere. but if you call him out, he’ll play it cool like it’s nothing.

"sae, did you just buy me an entire designer collection?"

"it’s just clothes."

"just clothes?? this cost more than my rent!"

"and you look better than rent."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ michael kaiser

kaiser loves showing off, especially when it comes to you. he’ll buy out a billboard just to plaster your picture on it with the words "the love of my life 🩵."

but he’s also surprisingly sweet. like, he’ll carry your bag, fix your hair when it’s windy, or randomly pull you into a dance in the middle of the street just because he can.

"michael, did you seriously put my face on a billboard??"

"obviously. everyone needs to know you’re mine."

"you’re ridiculous."

"ridiculously in love with you, yes."

·˚ ༘ ꒱ alexis ness

ness is a total softie. he writes you little love letters and leaves them in your mailbox, signed with his initials like he’s a secret admirer. you obviously know it’s him, but you let him think he’s being sneaky.

he’s also BIG on cuddles. whenever he sees you, it’s like he can’t function until he gets a hug.

"ness, you know i know it’s you, right?"

"…you’re supposed to pretend you don’t!"

"why?"

"because it’s romantic!"

© txrully

do not copy/translate/plagiarize/repost my works in any way. ( i will find you 😶‍🌫️ )

likes + reblogs appreciated ‹𝟹

[ew-selfish-art]

DP x DC AU: Tim had heard the phrase 'The wrong twin made it home' a number of times in his life, his parents were always very upfront about how the felt towards him. But... 'made it home' doesn't indicate death, does it? ...Tim ends up taking Danny's place by Sam's side in front of Congress to lobby the end of the Anti-Ecto Acts.

...

Tim has been up for hours passed when he told Alfred he would be resting and he's wrapped up his case files into neat little bows to deliver to Babs and the GCPD/Lawyers to do their jobs. Damian had made a comment earlier in their patrol that night about Tim being the wrong sibling to make it to his rescue and... and it got him thinking about that phrase. His parents were negligent with him, certainly, but they were always very clear about how he stood in their eyes. Praise and criticism were the two options, and very strictly limited passes of 'I love yous' that faded as he got older.

He's run his DNA before in the national databases- it was critical for maintaining his Alias' that multiple people didn't flag- but he's never searched in records before. About his twin. About the one who didn't make it home.

And its definitely the lack of sleep, and definitely the lack of brotherly affection he feels these days, but Tim just can't close the door until he's seen a death certificate. He's hacked Gotham General Hospital a million times for work, but doing it for his own gain feels wrong some how and he works with extreme caution. He finds his own birth certificate and... One Theodore Daniel Drake.

Tim snorts with a short ha, pretentious name alert and goes on to find not a single certificate of death or medical record of atypia. Oh no, what he finds is adoption paperwork meant to be closed to all wondering eyes and one Daniel James Fenton leaving the hospital instead. Tim blinks a few times, retraces his steps and then sure enough, learns for a second time that his TWIN was still alive.

Finding the Fentons was easy enough, their Lab address on all of their patents was seemingly also their home address. Danny had a much better hidden internet presence, it was good cybersecurity he'd have to praise him, but Tim had been trained better. Getting into his brother's files... Raised a number of new questions. Why was he compiling evidence against the government? What the fuck was he doing analyzing policy? Why did he have 'rogue' files???

Then Tim hacks into Danny's phone (he's learned at this point that Daniel was a no-go) and sees the conversations between his twin and his twin's best friends.

Sam Manson has an appointment with a Senator to Lobby for the end of the Anti-Ecto Acts. She wants Danny to join her, demonstrate something Tim can't determine, but he's refusing to leave and let his adoptive parents have even a moment to develop a new weapon without him there to destroy it. Someone called CW warned him about changes coming his way or something cryptic. Tim learns a lot from their back and forth, but stops reading once it gets to their personal squabbles.

Tim gets the meeting details and forwards it to Tam- If Danny can't make it... Tim will. And if Tim can't demonstrate whatever Danny was going to, it would at least help to throw around his name.

Tim writes an email to Danny- It's meant to go out after the lobbying appointment- and it explains that Tim found out about him and wants to connect if Danny does, and if Danny doesn't he at least wants to get him set up with his half of the Drake family inheritance. He includes a few personal facts, including that he too ended up adopted in life and had siblings, that he helped run a company and took on the world too soon. It takes a lot out of Tim to be so candid- but he doesn't want Danny to be too blindsided by the Waynes. He attaches a family photo with the label "you'll be able to tell which one is me'.

...

Sam is tapping her stupid, uncomfortable heels waiting for these dumbass, elderly politicians to get their shit together so she can speak. Sam was resourceful and surprisingly, the second she took on politics as a way to waste the family money, her mother Pamela was all for it. She's wanting Sam to run for president now... At least she doesn't complain when Sam organizes protests.

The door behind her opens, and while she knows its not going to be Danny behind her, a girl can feel a bit crushed. She really thought he would be behind her today, but Danny was being weird about this whole thing. Clockwork had him spooked about something changing today, and Danny wanted to be in Amity Park in case it was another Pariah situation or something. His parents had been on edge lately too...

"Sorry, I'm not late am I?" A voice asks and it's just so close but not- Sam turns her head to see Danny in a nice suit with long hair and eyebags way darker than she'd seen on him in a while. This... Wasn't Danny. She blinks, and then something in her anxiously decides that the universe is fucking with her and she will be fighting back.

"Everyone is late." She glares at him, appraising his every move. The woman behind him is typing dedicatedly on her tablet and the man himself looks like he might fall over while he shuffles his files in hand.

"Well, then I'm on time. My name is Tim Drake, I'm here to help your cause in getting the Anti-Ecto acts repealed and the parties responsible for it apprehended."

"Tim Drake? As in-"

"As in Co-CEO of Wayne Enterprises. And I've done a lot of research, so I hope you'll let me play a supportive role while you speak."

"There's no way you've been able to research if you've been out of Amity, The whole city is under a media blackout." Sam's glare looks like it could cut him.

"Not to brag, but that sort of thing doesn't slow me down these days. I've made physical copies of the things they're most likely to delete and I've sent everything to the Justice League, who in turn are sending it to the Lantern Corps." He states matter-of-factly and Sam finally stops being angry at the world to just be... stumped. What the hell was going on?

"How did you... Why?"

"Tam, tell Ms. Manson how passionate I am about human rights?" The guy sounds anxious, the woman rolls her eyes and says "Very." without stopping her typing.

The doors open and Sam has only a moment to decide that Tim can join her... He proves himself to be an asset, and his name alone gets them further than she had anticipated getting today.

....

Danny is watching Sam walk into the space via C-span, gasping when his own likeness follows behind her. What the fuck???

He can barely drag his eyes away as the clone (?) introduces himself as Tim Drake and proceeds to rip them into shreds for delaying Sam Manson of all people. Danny is transfixed and Tucker is blowing up his phone.

"DUDE ARE YOU SEEING THIS?" Tucker's voice loudly calls out the second danny blindly answers.

"Dude, I just, I don't even know? He cant be a clone right? But he's gotta be?" Danny hypothesizes.

"Nah dude, there's like, a whole lifetime of media presence for Tim Drake since he was like, tiny. This is so weird he looks just like you..."

"This is so weird." Danny dumbly agrees because he can't think of anything else to say.

Sam finishes her points, Tim submits the evidence to the court and they leave. Danny's phone pings with an email notification.

"Danny my guy, you should check that, Sam isn't responding yet. Her phone is probably still off."

He follows Tucker's advise and opening his email... Is a new message from Tim Drake.

"...I don't know what the fuck is going on?" Danny continues to say, and Tucker asks him just to read it out loud, "It's just... Apparently I am both adopted and a twin?"

"...My guy." Tucker sounds just as much at a loss.

...

Sam calls them both after Tim Drake is rushed away by his PA Tam (who she found herself admiring more and more), and is relieved when they dont immediately answer by screaming.

"So Danny, Tucker, you guys are traveling with me next weekend." Sam deadpans.

"Apparently shit gets twilight-zone level weird anytime you leave Amity!" Tucker exclaims.

"...What's next weekend?" Danny asks, hesitation in his voice.

"Your twin invited us, well, mostly you, to a Wayne Family Brunch. We're going cause those assholes have money and political influence, you're going because we all probably need to know what the fuck is going on with that guy."

[loveless-arobee]

My main gripe with the posts that are like "love is love includes platonic/familial/queerplatonic/etc. love" is ofc that they still fully ignore and exclude loveless people.

But what is also quite noticeable is that they also never mention sexual love. Because, it seems, in one stance about love (beside the "everybody loves"), a lot of aspecs still agree with society: that sexual love either just straight-up doesn’t exist, or that it’s inherently bad and abusive (that loving someone sexually without romance is abuse, "only using them for sex" etc.)

And on the other hand you also have aspecs acting like, on a societal level, sexual love is seen as equal to romantic love (with phrasing such as "love that isn’t romantic or sexual is devalued by society"), as if romanceless sexual love isn’t seen as basically the worst thing ever.

While I don’t experience love per se, the only type of love I can relate to even remotely is specifically sexual love. I care a lot for people I’m sexually attracted to, and sex is very important to me overall. And let me tell you, me expressing interest in a purely sexual relationship, no matter if I’d label my feelings as love or anything similar, are not ever treated any better than friendships or platonic relationships are.

I’m demonised to hell and back from queer people and non-queer allies and queerphobes all the same for my feelings and opinions on sex. Sex is seen as something that should only happen in very specific situations, and only then is it "good"; any other type of sex is "bad"; it’s just the definition that varies slightly between those groups—and I fit none of their definitions for "good" sex. No one sees sexual love without romance as a positive thing, least of all something equal to romance. (And especially not sexual intimacy and closeness without love and romance (or friendship, in slightly more progressive views, but that’s rare tbh))

Its just very noticeable that the majority of queer people, and between those especially aspecs because they do talk about non-romantic love the most, still don’t see sexual love as something that could just exist. It’s very noticeable when there’s hundreds of posts broadening the definition of love to include literally everything but specifically sexual love. Endless lists about what love is in non-romantic ways, and it’s glaringly obvious that people just do not believe anyone could care for someone they "just" want to fuck, "just" have a sexual relationship with, without wanting to be labelled as friends or anything similar even when they do things other see as friendship because they cannot grasp that people can care for their sexual partners even without having feelings for them that aren’t sexual.

Just still seems very sex-negative to limit sex to be something that either happens between people in a different kind of relationship (usually romantic, but again, some do agree you can have sex with friends, too), or something emotionless between strangers who then never interact with each other again (which is also most of the time treated as a bad thing which should stop).

Point is: Maybe question why you exclude sexual love specifically from your post about non-romantic love. (And at the same time, also stop acting like every person must experience some type of love)

[pannman]

Qpr with Alastor Headcannons

He's not fond of touching unless he's the one ignoring people's personal space. But for you, you are allowed to touch him more than others. He still prefers some kind of a warning and certain parts of him are off limits

However he is all over you. An arm around your waste, randomly pulling into a dance, playing with your hair or just poking you and pinching you to get a reaction

He doesn't agree to share a bed tbh he doesn't really sleep. But on certain occasions he'll lie by your side for the night and watch you sleep. Some might that creepy but you find it comforting

You wake up to him making breakfasting and brewing coffee. He knows exactly what you like and makes it perfect just for you

He may not be the most romantic but he loves domestic stuff. Cooking together, telling each other about your day, you tying his bow tie for him while he opens doors and such for you (no matter your gender he's just been taught to be a gentleman)

This started off as a friendship that grew into more of a partnership without much of a label that was unlike most relationships

He doesn't refer to you as his friend but doesn't want to call you his lover. You propose the idea of just calling each other partners. It's doesn't always imply romantic but it's definitely more than friends

When he is having a bad day, he comes to you no matter what you are doing and vents. Sometimes he just uses his magic to summon you to his room and begins ranting

If this bothers you then you can try talking to him. However don't be surprised when he has no sense of boundaries. Even when its with you

If you are having a bad day he will first make sure no one mistreated you. If someone did their screams will be in his broadcast by this afternoon. If not then he will just listen. He will listen to you talk about every stressful thing from to today. He will maybe offer advice or come up with a way he can help make sure those things don't happen again

If you are particularly upset and he is feeling up to it he may hold you. He knows that physical affection isn't really his thing but he also knows it helps soothe you sometimes

After you calm down he might suggest something fun to do together to get your mind off it

"I know, I know. It sounds like a very stressful experience. If it will help, maybe we can go to that new restaurant you were excited about it earlier today. I'm sure a delicious meal will assist in taking your mind off it"

[yesimwriting]

The diversity of louis is sometimes giving protective big bro and sometimes he’s a bestie. I feel he out of all people know how cruel the world can be, especially to women - ya know considering he’s able to hear the thoughts of people he and bestie reader encounter in their way. (Unrelated but know bestie reader is a stunner, I feel it in my bones ;))

I also figured out why I enjoy your writing so much: it’s the casual displays of affection & physical contact between a man and woman without making/forcing it to be romantic or sexual, like at all. It’s so refreshing to see.

Everything nowadays has underlying themes of attraction/sexuality and this is pure fluff. I love it.

i haven't been able to stop thinking about this ask since i got it.

first and foremost, thank you so much for sharing what you enjoy about my writing! part of the reason fanfic writing is fun for me is bc it's a way of looking at characters i already love and thinking about what they'd be like in a day-to-day way outside of crucial plot points.

i've also always felt more naturally inclined to settling the reader into the world of a story bc of how much i love world building, and i think friendships are a part of that. thank you for reading and enjoying :)).

omg, also unrelated but it's so cute that you consider bestie reader a stunner bc i almost made her a model/fashion girly lol.

i really love what you're saying about louis and bestie reader's dynamic. it's really important for me that it's clear that while they are so close they feel like family, there's nothing parental about their dynamic.

louis does not see bestie reader as his daughter/child, and reader does not see louis as a father/parental figure. however, his previous experiences as a father impact his relationship with her in ways he doesn't understand.

the way i see louis, he has a lot of subconscious trauma that aggravates the regret/doubt he's actively aware of. louis does not regret claudia, but i do believe he does regret not being there for her in certain ways and not protecting her. and while he doesn't see reader as claudia, being so close to a young woman that hasn't had to endure claudia's hurt, it's hard not to see what claudia could have been if he had been there for her more...or if she had never become a vampire at all.

he also feels guilty about getting to live so contently after everything that happened. if louis can 'protect' reader and prove that he's learned, then it's less wrong of him to be happy with reader bc he's doing something good.

this is why he acts like more of a 'big brother' sometimes. bestie reader and louis will be chilling and then reader will mention wanting to go to some out of control party or meeting up with an older art collector by herself and louis suddenly remembers every evil thought he's ever heard a man have...and he just can't let it go.

i see this as being maybe one of the only real points of contention in their relationship. i picture bestie reader as being in her early-to-mid 20's, and while she's definitely an adult, that label means so little to louis. he's nearly 200 yrs old and he can hear men's thoughts when he goes out with reader. he's not wrong to think that he has a greater understanding of the world than reader, or to be worried about her.

however, on reader's side of things, louis being protective is a sore subject. part of it is a freedom thing, but it's mainly bc she doesn't want to think about what she's not. she's not a vampire, she can't say she's roamed the earth for centuries, and sometimes she thinks that makes her too 'limited' for louis. the one time they got into an actual fight, it was because louis tried to imply that he wouldn't let her do something. louis was so villainously annoyed and insufferable during this time armand and daniel were struggling as much as them 😭

also, while louis does look out for bestie reader bc he wants her to be safe/happy, he's also protective bc he's already getting a limited amount of time with her. if something were to happen to her, he'd have the crash out to end all crash outs.

also, kind of a side note, but god forbid a guy makes the mental decision to act on thoughts of doing something to reader. louis is taking care of it :).

reader lowkey doesn't remember what it's like to have to worry about her safety, which is only good if she's going out with louis, which again, aggravates louis's overprotectiveness. it's a vicious cycle.

[taeiun]

this love is small.

synopsis: some of the little things that they do in your relationship

who: zb1 x gn!reader (not including yujin)

categories: fluff, some crack, headcanon styled scenarios

warnings: mentions of food in jiwoong + taerae's parts, light swearing

word count: 1.1k

✧ JIWOONG !

✧ jiwoong gains a newly formed sixth sense when it comes to your needs; he knows your favourite snacks by heart and also picks up if you guys are low on them without even looking at the cabinet.  you don’t even need to ask him to grab a snack for you because he’ll just know. probably knows when those foods are on sale before you even open your mouth to tell him. like, he’s probably already picked up three bags of those chips you really enjoyed last time and they’re waiting on the counter for you.

✧ will send you a notes app shopping list so that you don’t get jumped scared by the random appearance of shrimp chips and sour candies constantly and wonder how they got there half the time when you both haven’t even talked about being out of them.

✧ ZHANG HAO !

✧ hao keeps a collection of short, vlog-like recordings of the two of you in a private, for his eyes only folder on his phone. he watches these whenever he misses you or feels down and needs a pick me up. these videos will range from past dates, his commentary as he records you sleeping, to not even a two second moment of you laughing. you might find the angles unflattering, but he treasures each and everyone, watching them with a goofy ahah smile on his face.

✧ the others have 100% definitely, not even up for question, walked in on him in the middle of a watching session. he’ll just be sitting curled up in bed, blanket draped around him, with the lights turned off and earbuds plugged into his phone. this ends two ways. 1) the member leaves before he can notice and all is well or 2) they tease him only to end up with a pillow to the face

✧ HANBIN !

✧ whenever he’s on tour or can’t see you for long periods of time, hanbin will keep a list of things that happen throughout the days he’s gone to share with you. he never wants you to feel left out of his life and wants full communication with things. he can send you all the pictures you want of his travels, but nothing beats the actual stories.

✧ he mainly keeps tabs of things he did but will include the members’ shenanigans if he thinks they’ll make you laugh. starts a new list every time he has to leave and each one is dated, the activities labeled for what day and the time gone written at the top.

✧ MATTHEW !

✧ a big chatterbox when it comes to you, especially when it comes to his family. phone calls, messages, will even in emails to relatives, the conversation will drift to you no matter the topic. the only criteria needed for this to happen is for someone to simply breath in his direction.

✧ matthew pivots the conversation so fast that it gives his family whiplash. they aren’t complaining though; it’s nice to see him so happy and they can tell just how much he cares about your relationship. he wants them to love you as much as he does and by telling them these fond memories, he’s sure they will.

✧ TAERAE !

✧ the silly man he is, taerae will send you selfie updates throughout the day of where he is. you could probably make and sell your own bootleg, limited edition, taerae of zb1 pcs with how many you get from him. from walks to the company building to convenience store runs, he’s always sending you a picture of when he leaves to when he arrives at the destination as a way of assurance he’s safe.

✧ stores all of these in a folder labeled “for yn and yn only” and refuses to post them publicly, no matter how good you tell him some of them are. the background settings of his photos are always interesting. sometimes the members will be there, sometimes it’s while he’s in a storage closet. it’s funny until you wake up to find selfies of him at mcdonalds at 4 am with a handful of chicken nuggets shoved in his mouth.

✧ RICKY !

✧ spoils you so much. he knows that love doesn’t mean the amount of money you spend on someone but he can’t help but buy trinkets that remind him of you. the thought process is basically just: “oh. this kind of looks like yn.” and proceeds to checkout with a ditto keychain. ricky pays close attention to what type of accessories you tend to wear and prefer for this very reason. if your ears are pierced, you’ll find a new pair waiting for you on your desk that look eerily similar to his… like what? nooooo he totally didn’t go and buy subtle matching stuff pfttt nah- ok yes. please wear it; coordinate matching outfits with him.

✧ also, don’t bother asking for the prices of these things. he’ll never tell you because he knows that you’ll pay him back and he doesn’t want that. he doesn’t expect anything back and wants to make sure that you understand that he wants to do these things. you also probably won’t want to know because oof scary.

✧ GYUVIN !

✧ omfg he will abuse voice memo privileges to hell and back in order to let you in on dumb jokes and random thoughts. gyuvin constantly has his phone close within his reach just because of this so that he never misses the chance to blow your mind with… whatever falls from his mouth. even when in bed. the voice memos range from “i love you so much i don’t know what i’d do without you” to “did you know you are always within three meters of a spider?”. you never know if you’ll be swooning or sleeping with one eye open with these.

✧ the worst ones come at night for sure; he’ll wake up suddenly, blindly search for his phone, string together a weird ass sentence that only he’d be able to decipher, send it, then knock himself out again and sleep without remorse for his actions. he should be paying for your icloud with how much storage he clogs with those messages.

✧ GUNWOOK !

✧ he’s classically cheesy in a way and sends you screenshotted song lyrics that describe his feelings or remind him of you. “#LiterallyUs” and it’s paper rings by taylor swift. can be unserious about it though. one time, you couldn’t hang out with him because of exams and he responded with “tell me why / ain’t nothin but a heartache”.

✧ there are times where gunwook will not only send the lyrics, but also a clip of him singing that certain part of the song. he mainly sends these versions at night from the bathroom, and you wonder how none of the others have stormed into the room and told him to shut up.

^ . _ . ^ !? told myself to take it easy and not post again this week but um... this is a heavily edited fic from my old blog @/luvjiun that ive been meaning to repost. hehe ok junjun out >_&lt;

© taeiun 2023. all rights reserved. do not copy, repost, translate, modify, or claim any of my writing as yours.

[lifenconcepts]

BEING YOU DOES NOT NEED ANY RULES!!!

AAAAA

You can be an alterhuman while still feeling content with being in a human body!

You can use terms or not, relate to certain situations or not, and it doesn’t make you any less than what you already are! You’re you and that will stay true even if you feel like you’ve changed, no longer relate to the person you once was, or on the contrary, go back to being the being you were before. There are no limits or concrete steps you must take, as it’s all just part of existence!

Being uncomfortable with things others don’t see problems with is fine, as even if they don’t understand, your experience is valid. Enjoying things that are unusual for the self you present is also quite alright and you shouldn’t be brought down by anyone!

you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone, nor explain why you are the way you are. Any little detail and aspect about you is allowed to exist even without a label, and should you use one, there is no obligation to fit the stereotypical definition of said term!!

you’re allowed to have unusual symptoms or strange behaviours, desires for unsettling things and fascination with harmful things! It’s all a part of you and you don’t need the praise of others to feel like you can be yourself.

You can be a therian with no past memories, be a conceptkin of an entirely new thing you have seemingly created, make up terminology that allows you to express yourself in a way that you’re more comfortable with, you can feel like you need physical attributes to validate your identity, it’s entirely fine and possible to even have species dysmorphia and be fine with still presenting human, relate to species that simply have no concrete form, be a dog and yet like licking yourself clean, be a cat and adore dogs, be a bird and yet hate the sky, be a bug and yet seem big, be a slow creature and yet love the wind in your hair, be a god and yet proudly take on the form of a mortal.

even those “unusual” things that seemingly have no presence online, you’re still valid.

Stereotypes hold no value over you and any aspect of you is still you even if it ‘doesn’t make sense’. People can relate, or they can’t. And that’s not a you-problem. It’s theirs.

You can have reasons, or not have them. It still doesn’t change the fact you can be whatever you are. No matter if others demand an explanation. The only things you should feel inclined to share are your preferences or voluntary answers. The rest? Hidden away in a little box! Nobody needs the key, why should they?

[khaire-traveler]

hii, something i never understood is the difference between revivalist and recostructionist in the terms of helpol, may i ask you what are the differences?

Khaire, Nonny!

These definitions are sometimes a little different, depending on the person, but the way I've come to understand it is like this:

Reconstructionism: A methodology of practice that attempts to recreate the religion based on ancient worship, typically according to academic and historical resources.

Revivalism: A methodology of practice that emphasizes modern adaptations for worship and the modern day (this does NOT mean revivalists don't engage in historically arrested worship, to clarify).

-

One is focused more on "change" (revivalism), while the other focuses more on "tradition" (reconstructionism). This is probably the easiest way I can find to explain the difference. These methods can, and do, exist on a spectrum.

Personally, I don't care much for these labels. I don't enjoy labeling myself or my practice, as it feels very limiting for me. If I absolutely had to choose a label, I feel my practice leans more towards reconstructionist offline. I feel that these labels are sometimes used as a means to divide the community into two groups, which I'm not a fan of. Obviously, they're not always used that way, and people use these labels all the time without making it an "Us vs. Them" thing.

Anyway, I hope this answers your question! These definitions vary between people, as I mentioned, and these are definitely not rigid definitions. This is just how I would describe these terms in my own words. Take care, Nonny! 🧡

[thistlerock]

eughhhhh okay i'm caving i'm giving in this is it this is the qpr fabriz post i can no longer pretend that im normal abt them. This is just vaguely connected string of thoughts ft arospec headcanons. And very personal, I also often enjoy other people's more explicitly romantic interpretations of them but hey this is mine.

I've been fond of Fabriz ever since Riz offered to tear someone's eye out for Fabian because he was on a violent high and I jokingly said "woah that's romantic" but then it suddenly occurred to me that Fabian Aramais Seacaster, Son of Bill Seacaster the greatest pirate to have ever lived should actually think so too (even if he's like "what the fuck??" in the moment because Riz is ultimately, funnily enough, consistently more hardcore and violent than Fabian ((and honestly the rest of the party too 98% of the time))). There's something about "oh this guy took your eye? Want me to bite his out of his corpse for you?" that shows undeniable devotion and deep affection, be it because they're best friends or more.

After the second season it for me personally warped into more oh okay aroace king. (Oriented aroace. Because of Baron.) This isn't romantic it's just a deep emotional connection on a level that doesn't really fit into conventional terms but they're very important to each other and enjoy existing in the same space together but that's still Fabriz, just a different flavour, so y'know.

I think Fabian dates people and Riz stays at his side all the same. I think that if in the far future he and Mazey weren't together anymore because idk, Highschool romances don't often last forever, he would still be like hello potential romantic partner this is Riz The Ball Gukgak he is very important to me and my emotional support and also impulse control and whether you and I work out or not Riz will always occupy the space closest to me, it's about whether you're willing to share the space or not. He definitely is.

Riz doesn't have any romantic feelings but he's happy to be important enough to his dearest friend to be a priority even when relationships are involved. I think he's fine "sharing" affections because he's learned to feel secure in the fact he won't be abandoned. And he has his other friends who love him too (though not in the same way Fabian does, of course. And that's okay, he wouldn't want to occupy the role he occupies in Fabian's life in theirs. It's different) and he loves them and life is good, sometimes. He kind of just wants to be together forever without the implications or obligations a typical romantic relationship would bring? And there's a point where he's like "hey Fabian am I ruining dating people for you?" and he's. Worried. About that. But Fabian would assure him that it's fine, he's probably not all that compatible with people who are uncomfortable sharing anyway. I think a strictly monogamous partner wouldn't be all that happy with him, regardless of whether Riz is involved or not.

Fabian has a lot of love in his heart and feels it very strongly and it's kind of impossible to limit it to only one person? Polyamarous king. This is where I note that I do read Fabian as being aro-spec (allosexual though) but on a completely different level than Riz is. Fabian adores people so quickly and so strongly, and I think at some point he isn't able to differentiate whether that adoration is platonic or romantic or something in between? And that's a struggle at first, it'd be a struggle for any teenager, but I think as he'd get older he'd stop caring as much. No sense trying to label something that's so all over the place, he just goes with the flow? He calls it love and that's that, and he'll indulge in it.

Fabian says "I love you" a lot, Riz says it back. It doesn't necessarily mean the same thing, but it doesn't have to, that's fine. I think Fabian's love language is literally all of them (though giving gifts above all, maybe?) and Riz's is just quality time (acts of service is a close second), so a lot of their relationship is just hanging out like they would with other friends as well (and Fabian paying for as much stuff as he can get away with). I think Riz isn't opposed to physical affection but he's not a fan of pda, and while he likes sharing a blanket in the winter or sitting way too close in the back of the hangvan or pressing his face into Fabian's back when they're riding the hangman he'd probably not be that into hand holding. Its fine but it's probably more pleasant to maintain physical closeness in other ways with the height difference? And the claws, idk. There's also kissing. Riz would be cool with like, cheek or forehead kisses probably? (Unless he's having a day where he really doesn't want anyone to touch him period. Which I do think happens. Something something autism I don't think I can word this properly in detail) And Fabian would grab his face and smother him in those for fun. Or get dramatic and kiss his hand and act suave only to eat shit ten seconds later. I think being kissed on the mouth is a different story and kind of a fifty-fifty, depends on how touchy Riz is feeling that day. But in concept he's fine with it as long as it's just like, a peck on the lips, because he sees it as an expression of intimacy and affection and hey he doesn't have a problem with that that's cool. I definitely don't think he'd initiate them, though. It's more a "oh hey my partner likes this and I don't mind doing it for him" thing.

Oh speaking of the word partner that's the word they'd use, I think. Not boyfriends, just partners, and they're not dating but they're together. It's not, like, a thing they're particular about it's just the words I think they'd feel inclined to use. They probably don't talk about any of this stuff in that much depth, Fabian isn't that introspective anyway. It's kind of just a state of being. And what's a nicer state to exist in than close to your best friend?

Idk, I don't usually get involved with fandoms where a character seems so aromantic in a way I can relate to or a pairing feels so queerplatonic to me, but these two sure do and that's so delightful that I think about them all the time.

[notafraidofredyellowandblue]

Flake (from about 0:04) reading for Drecksack evening 2024-10-18

Topic "His better half" which Flake first mentions is his wife, who everyone who knows them will say is definitely his better half, but then moves on to the actual subject of the reading: his keyboard ❤️

While doing so, he mentions a couple of nice side-notes (like Flake always does) like the disadvantages of playing with Rammstein

like wanting a little painkiller at the dentist only to be laughed at '....but you play with *Rammstein*!"

or people charging him to pay double for stuff because Bild wrote how many millions Rammstein earn, without mentioning the costs they have

or his place getting burgled because the tourdates are published so everyone knows when he's away (but his place is a bit of a mess anyway so he still doesn't know if something went missing)

has a little dig at guitarists who give their guitars a women's name, Flake names his keyboard just what it says on the label. Keyboards and samplers all have nice long names like Ensoniq EPS 16 Plus, not like guitars which are just called 'Gibson' or something.

When Flake got a real keyboard that he could take along to concerts, his dad got him an old violincase, a straight box, which fitted the keyboard perfectly. For concerts further away it also had room for a toothbrush and some underpants. After Flake got a new keyboard that was a little bit bigger, it still fitted the case, but there wasn't room for underpants anymore.

(After 20 minutes and turning another page he says "such a long text...who writes something like that" 😄)

His band (and himself) got a bit tired of the keyboard and got the idea of getting a sampler, with which you can take random noises and play them with the keys, at 0:30 he mimickes how a sampler works 😊

Flake loves music because it just exists in a moment, then it's gone, there's nothing left. Just air being moved in specific waves (at abt 0h32 he mimickes this) which create sound, it's there when you play it, and then it's gone, and evrything is back to how it was, but different because the music changed things. Just like a concert, it's there in that moment, but after that it's over and that's it, everything back to normal. Just like life..

The Ensoniq sampler was very complicated and you had to think of a whole lot of things to use it, and even had to take care to remove the bits you didn't use, because storage space on the device was very limited, for storage you needed floppy-disks (Flake says he sounds like opa before the worldwar talking about it)

At one show (0h36) Flake wanted to play his solo with a broken down micstand, but then the sampler didn't play any samples anymore...when he tried the old trick of turning the sampler of and on, it didn't even do that. At Rammstein Flake's sampler starts the sequencss at which the whole band takes direction to start songs, so when the sampler broke down, the others just stood there and waited (Flake chuckles mischievously at the memory) 😊 after that he got an external harddrive, and a UPS (in case electricity failed) and had to schlepp more and more stuff to shows, but nobody really noticed because by that time the guitarists had started to a (gear) competiton (bringing ever more stuff)

As there came more songs and Flake wanted to have them all on one sampler to avoid having to changes storage in between, he ran out of keys to put the samples on and often shifted an octave to different keys, until no key actually matched the right note anymore... at this point the band 'with soft pressure' to move with the timds and made him start using a keyboard device linked to an Apple notebook, and Flake was amazed how much music he could now play with the one keyboard. He had to redo all his samples, get used to playing this all new, and what was worst...because all the others in the band used a similar system and actually did understand it, they all felt they could help invent new samples and keyboardmusic, some even better than his own.

With all these electronics, when a loud bang happened on stage or a huge pyro or light went on, sometimes the computer froze and had to be elaborately restarted which took it's time. Maybe that's the reason why you can see Flake dancing or walking around on stage so often.

In the end all the electronics failed too often, and the Ensoniq got too old (like Flake himself he says) so he bought a Nordstage organ, two of them, both having the same sounds on it so he can choose which to use. Problem with that one is that everyone has it, you see it everywhere, like a Volkswagen Passat car, everyone has it, it works, but you'd rather have something different.

(0:43) Imagine saying that about your better half, Flake realises he is a lot better off with his wife 🌺

(couldn't help doing a little 'take'...i miss his podcasts)

[bitstitchbitch]

I think something that isn’t talked about much is that sometimes you don’t know if you truly “count” as disabled. Like, I don’t consider myself disabled, but other people with my medical conditions do consider themselves disabled, and I believe them. I fully support anyone who claims the “disabled” label, but I’m hesitant to claim it myself.

if you asked me if someone who is disabled could work full time and go to school part time I would say yes, with some difficulties, but yes.

But in the same breath, I use working full time plus part time school as an example of how I am NOT disabled. Even though those things take most of my energy. Even though my sick leave use has ramped up during the school year. Even though I can only handle two classes, when before my fibro I could have handled three or even four (it would have sucked, but I could have done it). Doing that now would cause a major flare-up. But what I can do, I do well for the most part. I do it without accommodations. It just takes careful planning to make sure I account for flare ups.

I keep joking that it took the fear of fibro flare ups to get me to stop procrastinating so much.

idk what my point is. Maybe that the line between disabled and abled is blurrier than you think? I can do almost everything I could before fibromyalgia, but now it takes more planning, and some days I simply can’t do some things and have to put them off for another day. How much limitation is limiting enough? When does inconvenience and forethought become impairment? I’ve read the disability definitions. I understand them. I just don’t understand if they apply to me.

[bloggingboutburgers]

Hey, allo anon with an ace partner here. I wanted to say thank you so much for the well wishes! I figured I would send this in here again, so anyone else who is curious about what this experience looks like from the other side can see it.

My girlfriend came out to me a little over 2 years into our relationship. At the time it surprised me a lot, because she'd never given me any signs that she wasn't enjoying what we were doing. After we talked more I understood that she wasn't repulsed by sex and she didn't hate it, but she didn't really love it either and wanted to stop doing it for a while (so a sex-neutral ace).

Honestly, at the time, I did get anxious about it. Not just because of social conventions, but because I had viewed sex as an important bonding part of our relationship. I don't do well with change, and I was super worried about how a lack of sex would change our dynamic. I also had some insecurities about my own body, and my girlfriend admitting that she didn't see me as sexy was upsetting. But after speaking to my therapist, I realized that I was projecting my own issues on to the relationship. So I spoke with her again, and she reassured me that she wanted to be with me, and that she was confiding these feelings because she trusted me. She likes how I look, she just doesn't have the same sexual impulses I do.

So, I realized this was pretty much like cuddling. I love physical touch a lot, and I want to cuddle for a much longer time than she does. I like it when someone lies on top of me. She doesn't want me on top of her chest during cuddling. She still cuddles with me, but she tells me when she's satisfied, and we stop.

A few months went by, and I noticed that she wasn't spending any less time with me; she was actually spending more. We would still call every evening when we didn't meet up in person, we would still joke around, and she still told me she loved me and did everything she could to show it to me. We also began trying out new stuff together, and playing games and watching stuff more often. We also still had plenty of physical intimacy with things like cuddling and kissing, which made me really happy.

I realized that I didn't feel like anything was missing from the relationship. I just needed her to show and tell me she loved me in the ways she normally did. Sure, I am still attracted to her that way, but it wasn't something that would make or break the relationship.

It's been years since she came out, and at this point, I never expect anything sexual. It happens rarely, and I always check in with her multiple times before and during. We stop at any point she tells me. There are quite a few hard boundaries about what is and isn't off limits, and I always keep them in mind. I would rather satisfy myself forever than make her uncomfortable, and she knows it.

It's been over 5 years and we are still going strong. I am hoping to ask her to marry me in the next few years, because honestly, I can't picture wanting anyone else by my side. She is kind, funny, beautiful, intelligent, and treats me well. I could never ask for anything more from a partner.

Thank you SO MUCH for sharing. I myself definitely lack knowledge of what it feels like from an allo's perspective, so this was very educational for me, but beyond that... You have no idea how much hope this gives me.

From you being aware of how much sex meant to you in the context of your relationship and still being fine without it, to just... Heck, even your therapist for not blaming her for the situation. Therapy is still very much, in my country at least, an area where the absence or lower levels of sexual attraction will be hastily labelled as something wrong physically or mentally, so... Yeah, the amount of relief I felt reading that, you have no idea. And I can only imagine how much your partner appreciates it too.

Honestly I teared up a bit reading this - I sincerely wish you guys all the best and I hope you have a bright future ahead! (Also fun fact, seems you guys have been together as long as my partner and I have, it's nice to be able to relate to that too hehe^^)

[zanytotheyaks]

Otherchar Definition + Info!

hellooo everybody! Yakko [or Tape] here! Recently I came up with terms to better describe my own experiences with alterhumanity [more specifically the fictional portion of it all], and I thought it might be cool to share it all with you as well! Maybe someone’ll get use out of it, who knows? So without further ado…

What is otherchar?

Otherchar refers to an alterhuman identity in which an individual identifies as a fictional character, regardless of reason. It’s intentionally quite vague, as to encapsulate a wider variety of fictionfolk experiences that may prove to be otherwise quite unexplainable.

There’s much more information under the cut!

Why not just fictionkin?

I realized that I needed a wider term whenever I started gaining "kinsiders" that I couldn't make out. I knew I was them, but they also haven't been a part of me for a whopping 6+ years and ergo couldn't be regarded on the same level of my other "kins". Also, because I feel like my experience needs an explanation that only I can provide!

So what about the terms?

Char - Short for "character", this refers to the character that is identified as.

Main Chars - Characters who don't necessarily fit into cores, but are still influential enough to avoid gaining the "statichar" label.

Core - Characters at the center of the self. Because of my personal experiences with fiction and my tendency to draw connections between real life happenings and things that happen in stories, the lines between fiction and reality here are heavily blurred and it's difficult to separate these characters from being an integral part of myself.

Statichar - Short for "static character", this is a character who is almost stuck in time. I may have identified as them heavily at some point, but much less in the present day. This does not mean that they are not a piece of me, but rather that they are a representation of my identity at a younger age.

Symbolichar - Short for "symbolic character", these are characters in which the official canon of the media they come from is so limited that it's practically just identifying as their design. Maybe a few personality traits are there, but all-in-all it's difficult to call it a full-on "main char" because of the lack of content. It's almost as if I am more of an influence to them, and not the other way around like it is for my main chars and cores.

Recents - Chars who have not had enough time essentially. I haven't "been them" long enough to do the introspection necessary to categorize them more specifically. There may be an absence of "events" or "eras" here, since they're typically VERY newly discovered.

Events - Instances where I feel more like the char. This is fully out of my control, and sometimes is much more obvious than other times. It could be as little as saying a sentence and getting reminded of the character, ergo influencing the way I act until I forget about it again, or could be as large as a full-blown hyperfixation on the media influencing my behaviors to be more akin to the character's.

Era - A longer period of time in which an event had influenced behavior in some way. Looking back, I would be able to say that "Tails worked at a summer camp X years ago" because of how many events I had during that era and how influential it was to my perspective on that time.

Disclaimer and final thoughts!

You may have noticed that most of these descriptions are using first person pronouns. That’s because this is a description of my own experiences! That said, ANYONE can use these terms! Honestly, let me know if you resonate at all! It’d be really cool :D

I imagine my chars to be more like a jawbreaker or an onion. They're ALL me, ALL the time, but sometimes you can't see past the first couple of layers. On a surface level, you're going to see my recents. My layout likely reflects one of them! But that doesn't mean I should have to neglect my cores, who had such influential eras that I can't think of those times without thinking about me as these chars. But there's still stuff between too! I'm a multifaceted being with many different colors inside, and I think that’s pretty epic personally.

[hairscare]

If this is too personal honestly delete this ask id hate to make anyone uncomfortable💔

I was just wondering how you go about acquiring a qpp😭? Did you ask your friend to be best friends one day orrr did it jus happen and only later u decided to label it? Again was just curious abt aroace dynamics but no worries if this is too private love ur stuff ❤️

no worries im always happy to talk about my aroace experiences :) my honest advice is not to look for one. i know that sounds crazy but bear with me. if you approach every friendship with the lens of "can i make this into a commitment" youre only going to put weird pressures on yourself that will limit your capacity in the friendship. in my experience its something that has to happen on its own. not every close friendship has the potential to be one! i think people tend to be very eager to turn any relationship they find meaningful into something more than friendship so that they can justify its importance- escaping that mindset is very important!

now in my experience, we had already been "special friends" as we call it for two years before we decided to a qpr. basically we were best friends who felt a special connection to one another but we werent in a relationship. this is another important thing to emphasize: youre not in a qpr without all parties explicitly agreeing to it. a close platonic connection does not immediately equate a qpr. our relationship has been exactly the same for 2+ years, but it was only when we both agreed to be in a qpr that we actually were in one. i dont value our time pre-qpr any less than i do our current relationship as its the same connection its just that now theres more commitment involved

neither of us actually wanted to be in a qpr beforehand. id had a very bad experience with relationships beforehand, and i really never saw myself entering one after that. id even been in an 11 hour "qpr" that i broke off because i found it to be way to much unnecessary pressure with someone that i just wanted to be my friend. the qpr feeling absolutely wasnt there. aspen on the other hand didnt understand how qprs worked and so didnt want one. wed had an ex friend of ours (who was allo might i add) desperately try to push us into a qpr together but we both pushed back at the idea. you cant force it, and you DEFINITELY cant force it to happen out of the allonormative expectation that everyone needs a relationship to be fulfilled.

when we did finally change our minds, it was on our terms. aspen figured out what a qpr is and realized that he did want a committed friend, and i realized that i wanted to spend my life with him, so when he told me about his sudden change in perspective i immediately said id like to be that person for him. really the only thing that has changed since then is our future plans, we still act exactly the same with each other. of course if youve been here long enough you know that we do sometimes have a bit of difficulty trying to label each other when talking to others. sometimes i call him my roommate even though were on opposite sides of the country right now, sometimes i call him my boyfriend at the risk of someone misunderstanding it as an allo situation, sometimes hes my best friend (feels a bit watered down but whatever), sometimes i call him my boygirl (this one works well since its kind of unclear what it means), and of course my special friend is the most accurate but it doesnt make much sense to people who dont know us. sometimes he calls me his ghoulfriend and i really like that one

the best analogy i can really give for how a qpr feels is like bonded animals you see on petfinder that have to be adopted together. you cant force animals to be bonded, it just happens. its like that. hope this helps!