lbjeff

[lbjeff]

Danny as the Ghost King and God of Space who has been alive for far too long and decided to jump into the DC dimension. He’s bored, whimsical, and mischievous. He grabs a piece of cardboard and writes:

Challenge me to a game of your choosing. Loser grants any one (1) wish the winner asks.

And, of course, people roll their eyes at it. They roll their eyes at the clearly homeless young man on the street corner with the weird sign. Some toss him some change every now and then, but no one “challenges” him.

Then, someone does.

Sarah, a street kid with quick hands figured that she’d be able to easily beat the weirdo with the sign. She says, “I bet I can pick more pockets than you.”

She’s been doing this all her life. She knows what she’s doing. And yet, she loses. She doesn’t run, despite the danger she fears she may now be in. She lost, fair and square. So she waits for whatever “wish” the weirdo has.

He says, “I wish for you to take me to the best street food vendor you know.”

And she stares at him like he’s lost it. Waiting for the other shoe to drop. It never does. She takes him. He buys them both dinner.

Later, at “home,” she goes to bed without being hungry for the first time in weeks and doesn’t think about how she’d been wishing for that very same thing.

—

It’s a while after that someone challenges him again.

A street worker, Maxi, with nothing to lose. She jokes with him, says, “I bet I’m a better kisser than you.”

He says, “Let’s find out.”

She wins. He asks, “If you could have anything, what would you wish for?”

At this point, they’re friendly, somewhat close. It’s been a wild night and she has nothing to lose. She’s about to lose her kid to CPS, she lost her day job, she’d just gotten an eviction notice.

She says, “I’d wish for the chance to go back to school without worrying about paying for tuition, rent, whatever. So I can give my kid a better future, y’know?”

He nods, says, “I’ll see what I can do.”

She doesn’t get it, at the time.

A month later, she puts the final box down in her new apartment. She smiles at her kid, who is staring out the window with bright, wide eyes and not shying away at the worry of gunfire. She joins her baby by the window and thinks about how lucky she’s been; she has a good job, a new apartment, she’s going back to school— and she makes eye contact with the person she made a stupid bet with months ago. He waves and tilts his head in a knowing nod. She gasps, smiles, and cries because how could it be possible? But also because who cares how it was done. She’d gotten her and her kid out.

—

It’s not something that happens often. People challenge Danny on occasion, some win, some lose. Nothing outrageous.

Then a kid, far too young to be out as late as it was, comes up to him. She’d heard the guy was safe. How DJ won and got a new skateboard and how, despite losing, Sarah’s dad finally got convicted and her mom was steadily getting clean.

Li Chen figures it couldn’t hurt to play. She chooses rock, paper, scissors. She loses and says, “What is your wish?”

The man looks up and Gotham’s smog covered sky, “I wish I could see the stars from here.”

Li Chen agrees. “I don’t think I can do that.”

He smiles at her, something knowing in his eyes, “Maybe not right now, but you will.”

Li Chen doesn’t understand until decades later, looking at the stars under Gotham’s semi-clear skies with her wife, how both their wishes came true.

[lbjeff]

Danny: Hey, we need to talk-

Jason: I'm pregnant.

Danny:

Jason:

Danny:

Jason:

Danny: I knew ghost biology was weird but what the fuck?

Jason: Ghost?

[lbjeff]

Danny: I know this looks bad but it's not what you think.

Bruce: What is it then?

Danny: I swear B. this guy was like this when I found him.

Bruce: This young man was already covered in glitter, his hair changed to green with red polka dots and half dresses in, what is that, a space suit?

Danny: It's actually a hazard suit.

Bruce: Explain yourself.

Danny: Okay, first of all, just because you're my mom's godfather doesn't mean you can boss me around, and second, he was literally left here.

Bruce: A random boy was left in your room without your knowledge? Someone just randomly broke into my highly secure manor without anyone the wiser?

Danny: Yes!

Bruce: You're grounded, and yes, I can ground you since I could ground your mother.

Danny: You're only two years older then her!

Bruce: And yet, I'm still her godfather! You're grounded! And you're going to apologize to this young man when he wakes up and introduced him to the family in case he's a boyfriend!

Danny: This isn't fair I dont know how he got here!

Damian two doors down: Who is that stranger you planted in Daniel's bed?

Jazz: His name is Wes. He followed us to Gotham and Danny pissed me off yesterday. I figured I could hit two birds with one stone in terms of revengance.

[lbjeff]

Jason: *Pinning for Tim.*

Tim: *Hunched over like a shrimp at the bat computer in three day old sweats and eating Cheeto Puffs with chopsticks to keep the powder off his finger.*

Jason:

Jason: Really? That's what I picked? Of all people? This is not pinning material!

*The Next Day*

Media: Here is Tim Drake in the newest fashion from-

Tim: *in fancy suit with perfect hair, smouldering eyes*

Jason: Right: he can do both.

[lbjeff]

Superman, who spy on the Bats on his free time like an old lady and her favorite TV show: Why? We are not that bad, we even has a farm

Kon, comes down from upstairs, dress in rock and roll jacket, new hair style and a piercing on his nose (he just glue it on): What’s wrong, Clark?

Clark, looks at his son up and down, then let out the sign: I understand know. And you are too young to be a dad anyway

Kon, super confused: Hah?

Jaytim Baby Drama

Au where Tim is intersex. He identifies as male but lately has been going through baby fever and knows his possibilities are open. Until now he had never thought of having a baby himself but now that he’s been thinking it through, he can’t think of anyone better. He isn’t sure who he wants to father his child though, just that he can only trust a few people.

So he just kind of tossed the idea out there and to see who jumps on it.

As they sat in the parlor at night doing their own things:

Tim, blatantly: I want a baby.

Damian:

Dick:

Bruce:

Jason slowly unzipping his pants: well if you must-

Bruce slaps his hand away: let’s not pick your child’s father in a two second decision.

Tim: too late. He’s got dibs.

Jason, grinning: fuck yeah, I got dibs.

Dick: awe, no fair! I want a baby Timmy!

Jason: too late, he’s mine.

Dick pouted his lip.

Bruce: Tim, let’s think here? You’ve got other choices. What about that Kon boy?

Damian: you want a Kent to father his child?

Bruce: …

Bruce: have fun boys.

[lbjeff]

Cap: No! We talked about this. You can only fight the big guys with me when you're 16!

Junior: That's so unfair!

Cap: I know, but it's just to keep you safe! You're too young-

Junior: BULLSHIT. You started being a hero at EIGHT and used to be ALONE, without any adult supervision. And you used to fight all kinds of terror.

Cap: ... It's different, and you know it.

Nightwing from afar having flashbacks of being a vigilante from a very young age and going from anger issues to the always happy, friendly, and helpful persona: omg, the trauma hit us the same way. Trauma buddys!!!

[lbjeff]

update on the rule #9 series!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/67183318/chapters/174541561#workskin

[lbjeff]

Ok ok stay with on this, Billy x Danny x Jason.

Two powerful gods and a guy who die but come back to life because marvel found out that robin 2 die and ask Danny if there is anything that he could do, Danny brought back Jason, Danny and Billy start dating, years later Jason gets told by Constantine that it wasn’t the Lazarus pit that brought him back. (because Jason still ended up in the league cause somehow, I haven’t figured that out yet) cue Batman going into cardiac arrest after finding out that his son is in a relationship with two great powerful beings, that he knows nothing about

Everyone notices how Batman has become much darker and more irritable. Marvel can see the curses of Gotham slowly seeping into the man's body and bones, though Robin's presence has always kept Batman's mental shields up. Has something happened to Robin?

Marvel: Mr. Batman, sir, are you all right?

Batman (sharply): I'm all right.

Marvel: It's not that. I can see it. You've become more irritable and angry. Also, your mental shields are not holding back the curses of the city. And your shields have always been kept up by Robin's presence. Has something happened to Robin? Is there anything I can do to help him?

Batman's lips become a thin line. His body tenses. And his voice is hoarse.

Batman: He's dead, Marvel. There's nothing you can do.

He's gone before Billy can say anything. Billy frowns. Robin's death has taken a toll on Batman. If nothing is done, the hero can become the villain. This should not happen. Luckily, Billy has someone who can help.

Billy: Are you sure this will work?

Danny: Yeah. I'm sure we can do it.

John Constantine (digging up the grave): If we get caught doing this, we'll get arrested.

Billy: I put up a distraction charm. No one will notice us.

John: This is the last time I'll join in on any of your plans.

Danny: Don't whine. You'll get a piece of your soul and an old grimoire. So get to work with the shovel.

Billy: We'll also have to work through his mental issues after he's resurrected.

Danny: It won't take long.

The shovel hits the coffin. The three exchange glances. John digs up the lid. He sighs and opens the coffin. The smell of dead flesh hits his nose. The Brit holds back his gag reflex. Danny and Billy climb down. Danny gently touches the coffin. A green portal opens above the coffin. Ectoplasm slowly flows into the coffin. Robin's body trembles, absorbing the bright liquid. Slowly, a core forms. Suddenly, Robin takes a hoarse breath and opens his eyes. Billy whispers a spell. Robin quickly falls asleep.

John: We just fucking broke the law of the world.

Billy: I authorized its breaking.

Danny: This is why I like you.

John: Yeah, yeah, teenagers, always horny.

Danny: You're jealous.

John: Me? No. Let's get the kid up.

Robin's body is being lifted to the ground. Billy was fixing the suit, while healing the wounds that hadn't healed well. Danny put his hands on Robin's temples and fixed the kid's mind. John was covering up the traces of their little stunt.

Bruce is awakened by a worried Alfred. The butler looks scared. This immediately puts Bruce into a fighting stance.

Bruce: What happened?

Alfred: Master Jason is asleep in the Batcave.

Bruce rises from his bed faster than lightning. He doesn't remember how he got to the Batcave. Jason was asleep in a chair, covered with a bat-print blanket. Bruce's breathing becomes labored and he falls to his knees. His son's chest slowly rises and falls. He was actually sleeping. So peacefully. As if he had been sitting at the computer for too long and had fallen asleep from exhaustion. Tears roll down Bruce's cheeks and he begins to sob.

Jason wakes up slowly. His whole body feels so rested. He hasn't slept this well in a long time. He opens his eyes and sees the ceiling of his room. Jason sits up slowly. He freezes. Bruce was asleep in the chair next to his bed. Jason blinks, confused.

Jason: Bruce, what the hell are you doing here?

Bruce wakes up instantly. He looks at Jason intently. Jason felt uneasy. Bruce was assessing him. But why?

Jason: B, did you hit your head? Any news from Dickhead? How was his trip?

Bruce: Everything went well.

Jason: B, what happened? Why do you look like you've been crying a few times? Will Alfred tell me if I ask?

Bruce: You...don't remember?

Jason frowns. What doesn't he remember? Suddenly images pop into his head. He screams and clutches his head. He remembered. The pain, the Joker, the blood, and the explosion. He remembered it all. Jason starts to cry. Bruce quickly hugs him, rubbing circles on his back.

Jason: Am I dead?

Bruce: Yeah. Sorry.

Jason: But if I'm dead, then why am I alive?

Bruce: I don't know. But I promise to find out.

So the long tests began. Memory is fine, body is even better than before, DNA is slightly different, but only slightly, there is a strange addition in the blood that no device can recognize. Jason bites his lip nervously. Why is he alive? He clearly remembers how he died. But no matter how much they searched, they found nothing. Even his grave remained untouched!

Dick cried for several hours after he saw Jason. Jason spent several hours in his brother's arms.

Bruce became more protective. He forbade Jason to go outside at night. Limited his heroic hours. This infuriated Jason and he ran away from the mansion. Then Bruce attached a bracelet to his leg that tracked his location and emitted an annoying squeal if he went outside the permitted zone. Jason felt trapped in a cage.

And then Tim shows up. Bruce and Dick have been captured, Jason can't leave the manor, and Alfred is too old. Tim shows up, looks at Jason in shock, then asks for the suit to save the two dumb asses. Jason personally puts the suit on him and sends him to the coordinates. Tim arrives in time and saves the day.

Jason is furious with Bruce, so he says he will find himself another teacher, that he will not be so obsessed with guardianship. If necessary, Jason will cut off his own leg to do it. Bruce removes the bracelet. Tim stands aside and does not understand what is happening. Jason offers Tim the role of Robin, so that Bruce does not go crazy. Tim immediately accepts the role of Robin. A brief peace reigns in Wayne Manor.

Diana became Jason's new mentor. He almost died when Wonder Woman agreed to train him, Green Arrow also convinced him to use a firearm. And so Jason began his training. He took on a new hero name and a new image.

Marvel stood aside and smiled softly. He was glad that Robin was happy.

A few years later, Jason was on a mission with John Constantine, where they had to dig up an old grave to retrieve a very dangerous artifact.

John: Why am I digging up graves again?

Jason: Again? How often do you dig up graves?

John: This is my second time. Last time, it was a boy's grave.

Jason: Really? Where?

John: Gotham.

Jason freezes. He looks at the magician. Digging up graves is not popular in Gotham. And bodies always turn up. There was only one grave that didn't have a body in it.

Jason: You dug up the second Robin's grave.

John freezes. The Brit looks up.

Jason: Why did you dig up that grave?

John raises the shovel and points it at Jason's throat.

John: How do you know that?

Jason: Because I was that Robin. That grave was mine.

John (lowering the shovel): Damn me.

Jason: Answer the question. Why did you resurrect me?

John: Dude. I'm not all-powerful. I was only there because those two wouldn't do the dirty work. I don't have the spell or the mana to resurrect a human.

Jason: Then who resurrected me?

John: The Phantom, at Marvel's request.

Jason's heart skips a beat. The Phantom. He's heard the name a few times. Bruce said it was a ghostly entity that was the king of all ghosts. Jason only saw him once, when the Phantom came to pick up Marvel for some meeting.

Marvel asked the Phantom to resurrect him. Why?

Jason: Why would they resurrect me?

John: I don't know. They just came to my house and offered me a job. I swear, they'll kill me soon.

After that, they work in silence. Jason wondered why Marvel needed to resurrect him. How did the Phantom even agree to this?

Jason: I found out who resurrected me.

Bruce: Really? How did you know and who did it?

Jason: John answered. The Phantom did it at Marvel's request.

Bruce straightens up and looks at Jason in shock. Jason waits for the shock to pass.

Bruce: Why didn't I realize that right away? Only the Phantom is capable of such a perfect resurrection, and he would do anything for Marvel.

Jason: They've known each other for a long time, haven't they?

Bruce: Yeah. They've been dating for about three years, officially. I should call Marvel.

Jason manages to catch Marvel after his shift.

Jason: Marvel!

Marvel: What is it?

Jason: I want to thank you!

Marvel: Really? For what?

Jason: I know what you asked the Phantom for.

Marvel (squints): John told you about it.

Jason: He let it slip. I connected the dots. Didn't Batman call you?

Marvel: I saw the calls from him. But I couldn't call back. There was no time.

Jason: Will you convey my thanks to the Phantom?

Marvel: Sure!

Jason: I wanted to ask you a question. Why did you ask to resurrect me?

Marvel: Your father was going downhill. He wouldn't let anyone near him to help him. He would become the villain he was afraid of becoming. I know a lot of people like that. I just wanted to help him. Also... You were too young to die. So please be careful. I don't think the Phantom will be able to bring you back to life a second time.

Jason: I'll definitely take that into account. Thank you for everything.

Suddenly, Jason has an ability. And it's fire. The mages are confused because they can't find the magical core in Jason. John explains everything.

John: It's a ghost core. He was resurrected by ectoplasm.

Zatanna: But he's not a ghost. How could his ability manifest?

John: Did you touch any bright green goo?

Jason: I was involved in destroying the Lazarus Pits. I was pushed into that pool.

John: That's my answer. I'll contact the Phantom. This is his territory.

The Phantom arrives quickly. Jason falls to the ground from the immense pressure, which quickly disappears.

Phantom: Is this the Robin I resurrected? You've grown very large.

John: And he has fire powers.

Phantom: I see. The core has awakened. The fucking Lazarus Pits. You need training to control the flames.

Bruce: Can you train him?

Phantom: Not always. But Marvel can when I can't. He knows as much as I do.

Jason: I'd be very happy to train under you.

Phantom: No big deal, kid. You became my responsibility the moment I brought you back from the grave.

Thus begins Jason's training in fire control. He also began to levitate for a short time. Marvel and Phantom turned out to be very good teachers. They understood him and always gave him good advice.

Sometimes Jason caught himself looking at the two heroes longer than necessary. He couldn't help himself! Marvel's laugh was pleasant, and Phantom was dangerously handsome. The two heroes flirted with each other without shame. Jason's insides twisted every time Marvel or Phantom corrected his stance or called his name. Not to mention the dreams. Jason wanted to kill himself every morning. It's a good thing he didn't live in the manor anymore.

Meanwhile, Billy and Danny have a conversation about how they are both attracted to Jason. They trust each other. After all, they have been through a lot together. So they decide to take the first step. Together.

Phantom: Listen, Jason. Marvel and I want to talk to you.

Marvel: This is very important. Do you promise not to tell anyone?

Jason: Of course! What do you want to tell me?

Billy says a word, and Danny becomes human. Jason opens his mouth in pure shock.

Billy: Nice to meet you, I'm Billy Batson. I'm nineteen years old.

Danny: I'm Danny Fenton. I'm also nineteen. I'm also planning on changing this guy's last name. Will you help me?

Jason: What the?!

Billy: We decided to reveal our identities to you now because we wanted to.

Danny: You would have found out later anyway when we started training you in the ghostly gaze.

Jason: You're a year younger than me!

Billy: Yeah, that happens. Life is weird.

Jason: You were a hero for ten years!

Danny: Getting powers at nine isn't very helpful.

Billy: You actually died to get powers.

Danny: Honey. You were homeless.

Billy: Your parents were hunting you.

Danny: And they couldn't catch me. But all you had to do was smile and I was caught in your net.

Jason looks at the two. Danny has become even more handsome, Billy was cuter than Marvel, although his muscles showed a lot of training. Jason wanted to touch those muscles. How warm was Danny compared to his Phantom form? He wanted to know.

Billy: Are you okay?

Jason: Yeah! I'm totally fine!!

Danny: I don't think so.

Jason: I'm fine! Thank you for revealing your identities! I'll keep them a secret, no one will hear about them from me!

Billy (puts his hand on his shoulder): You're all red. Are you sure you're okay?

Jason (blushing even more): Yeah!

Damn, why did Jason act like a girl?! What will they think of him? Danny leans close to him and lifts his chin.

Danny: I know you're not okay.

Jason: I...I...you....

Billy: Danny! Don't embarrass him like that!

Danny: I'm sorry, Sparky. He's so funny when he's embarrassed.

Billy: If you don't want to tell me. I will. Jason. Danny and I want to go out with you. I know you need time to think. We're not pushing...

Jason: I agree!

Danny: That was quick!

Billy: Really.

Danny: When are you free?

Jason: Tomorrow, all day.

Danny: Great. Billy will come get you. We'll go to the best cafe. We should get to know each other better. I'm sure we can make a great triangle.

Billy: If you were kidding about the Bermuda Triangle, I'll eat all your cookies.

Danny: Never thought of that, Sparky~

Bruce nearly falls out of his chair when Jason tells him he's started dating Captain Marvel and the Phantom.

Bruce: What are you doing?!

Jason: They're both so gorgeous. I almost died when they kissed me. Who knew the Phantom was a slow kisser and Marvel was so intense.

Bruce: When did you start dating them?!

Jason: About two weeks ago.

Bruce: Oh my god. How...? Why...?

Jason: Don't worry. They're really good.

Bruce: We don't know anything about them. Not a single weakness!

Jason: Yeah, that happens. Okay, I need to go get ready for another date.

Jason hangs up and Bruce slumps into his chair, his paranoia about Marvel and the Phantom resurfacing. He needed to find these two's weaknesses. Now.

[lbjeff]

Danny was going to step up before *BAM*, Superman fall through his roof, right in front of him, making a big hole next to the hole that Nightwings already broke

Danny looks up at the big hole at his roof then looks back at Superman, then looks back at the roof. Finally, Danny looks around his house, with holes on roof, walls, broken windows, ruined couch and his brand new TV.

Danny: Oh come on! What now? The whole JL hold a meeting in my house?

“Oops.”

Danny shrieked.

The bloodied vigilante leaning against his wall was concerning. But even worse…

“My window!! Oh my god! Why?!”

“Your- is that- that’s seriously your first concern? I’m actually offended.”

“Oh, is the dumbass bleeding out on my carpet giving me sass? Watch the attitude, you’re half a quarter pint from death right now.”

“You’re strangely calm… about this.”

Danny gestured to his window, shattered in front of him.

“Do I look calm to you? I literally just replaced that window last week!”

“My bad.” The vigilante slid down the wall, leaving a bloody smear.

“Oh my god,” Danny groaned as he got a first aid kit and began patching the guy up. “I’m never getting my deposit back.”

“You have weird priorities.”

“Listen, bird guy-”

“Red Robin.” Bird guy interjected. He winced as Danny dabbed the alcohol soaked cotton ball harder on his cut.

“But if I had a nickel for every time a vigilante crashed through my window, I’d have two. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice.”

“Who was the first one?”

“Surprisingly? Signal. Dude got a migraine and crashed through like a pigeon versus a glass wall.”

“Damn, he didn’t mention that. You got pics?”

“Pay for my carpet and wall first, and then we talk blackmail negotiations after.”

“Deal- ow!”

“Stay still, dumbass!”

[lbjeff]

So do yall know about Jon Breaks Bad News? Guy that calls people for other people to, y'know, break bad news, sometimes in a funny way sometimes for serious stuff...the reason why I am saying this is because like any other DP fan I have the urge to say "But what if my favorite ghost?"

--

Danny, l a ring down as he reads the message: Hello is this Jason?

Jason, fully still in "I cut off mafia boss heads and put them in a duffle bag" days: Who the fuck is this.

Danny, not even a little bothered: My name is Phantom, from Phantom breaks bad news, are you Jason?

Jason, honestly confused what is happening here: I...how did you get this number?

Danny, sipping a smoothie: i am just going to assume your Jason, Tim says that you broke into his house and beat him up in scaled panties, and that your whole gimmick is a rip off of the guy who killed you, B misses you and would still love you after all...why did you wear underwear while breaking into some guys house?

Jason, feeling like he just got flashed banged: Ex-fucking-scuse me? Tim that little bitch, I swear to- he fucking stole my dad and my fucking suit he doesn't get shit to say!

Danny, looking to Jazz off camera: So you broke inot the house to beat up the guy who slept with your dad and stole a suit? What was he going to a wedding?

Jason, feeling like he is having an aneurism: I...I am going to hang up.

Danny, stretching like a cat: Okay bye, love you.

Jason: confused sqawking before hanging up

Danny, dead pan looking to the camera: He didn't say it back.

---

Babs, infront of the computer in the clock tower: Keep going that way Batman, the target is just around the corner...hang on i am getting a call.

Danny, now floating upside down: Hi this is Phantom from Phanton breaks bad news, is this Barbara?

Babs, eyes widening as she scrambles to start tracing the call because its coming through the bat network: Who is this? How did you get on here?

Danny, looking to Sam and Tucker off camera: I just picked up the phone, are you Barbara? Because I have bad news for you.

Babs, getting frustrated because every time she finds an avenue of finding the caller, it goes dead a second later: It...it is, who is this?

Danny, watchingnas Tucker gets an evil smirk on his face, typing hard on his PDA: Like I said, my name is Phantom of Phantom breaks bad news, this message is from a dude named Jay? Saying, get your redheaded ass back home you can play with the leather clad bastard man later, you have a college exam later, your father would be disappointed. What are you doing for college?

Babs, freaking out because what ever was blocking her started to counter hack her: U-uh...Library stuff, Sorry did you say Jay?

Danny, popping the 'P': Yup, payed me 50 dollars to call! I love you bye."

Babs, confused as the counter hacking stopped dead: I...what?

Danny, still haven't hung up: Say it back.

Babs, so utterly confuaed: I-i love you too?

Danny, grinning: great thanks bye.

Babs, wondering what the fuck just happened.

In Amity Park

Danny talking to Sam: Could you see what Tuck was doing during all that?

Sam, who in turn was lounging in a bean bag reading a book: Yeah...something about batman files? I wasnt paying attention, he'll tell us if we need to worry.

---

Bruce, running around all of Gotham, trying desperately to solve the Riddlers puzzle to save some hostages, getting a call over coms: What is it.

Danny. Looking over at Ellie who was in camera frame, floating above him: Wow someone's grouchy, take a cough drop dude, Anyways my name is Phantom from Phantom breaks bad news,I got hired from a guy named Edward to tell you some.bad news? Is this Batemen?

Bruce, skidding to a stop, tapping into another com level: Oracle, he is back

Danny, blinking a bit as the call went silent: Hello? Fuck did he hang up on me?

Bruce, growling as he speaks: Speak, You said that Nigma sent you something to tell me?

Danny, scrunching up his nose: Your a real people person arnt you...Your buddy Edward says, you got duped, it isnt actually him and your being scammed into not looking in the right places, and that he is offended that you would think such a low quality riddle is from him.

Bruce, eye twitching: What. How could this not be him we...unless...

Danny, batting away Ellies hand as she tries to steal the Fenton phone they are calling from: Oh he just payed me more, looks like he is...actually on vacation? And who ever bitch with a bad bob is running around with his name isnt actually him, if you dont believe him check...I think that is in Cuba?

Bruce, switching coms once more: Oracle, look into Cuba, The real Riddler may be there actually, Robin, go back to the cave and grab the extra strength Clayface spray.

Danny, at the same time, looking at Ellie who makes grabby hands at the phone: No i am- no i am not done yet- okay you can do the next one but- ugh fine but let me hang up first.

Bruce, finally returning to the call: Phantom are you still there? Phantom...Fuck me sideways in a gondola.

Babs, pulling a face that could be felt from over the coms: Could never pay me enough to sleep with your stinky goth ass, go see the Cat or Supes later if you want to get-

Bruce, blushing slightly: Silence. I didn't mean to say that, try and find Nigma then get back to tracking Phantom.

---

Ellie on the phone this time, Danny over her shoulder this time: Hello this is Specter from Specter breaks bad news is this Bateman?

Bruce pausing giving a presentation, looking up at the intercom of the watch tower: Of course you are able to call here.

The rest of the JL, looking around at each other: Batman what is-

Ellie, leaning back into Danny: Yeah, so i got a message here from you kid Dick, which b-t-dubs, is a super bad name to give to your child, like come on man.

Bruce holding his head in his hands because he has been subjected to these two for years at this point: I didn't name him, he came with it already when I got him...just speak, get this over with.

Ellie, giggling: Pump the hate breaks Bates, Dick here says that Fuck you for being a horrible father, you are a narcissistic, sociopathic, middled aged man baby that cant seem to keep the goth furry inside and causes untold emotional and mental trauma on anyone unlucky enough to meet you, he hopes you die alone and you are undeserving of love...also that if you replace the pop tarts you ate he takes everything back and he would love you forever.

The JL, completely speechless because some little girl just absolutely roasted batman but also since that roasting was written by a grinning Nightwing that is sitting across from batman

Bruce, after taking a few deep breaths: I really dont like how my children use you two to air grievances with me.

Ellie, humming: Oh yeah, we also got one form Tim, Tason Jodd, Damian Al Ghul (specificallynot Wayne), and...Jarro? Also, like five more from this Dick guy.

Bruce, slumping into his chair: I am revoking Tim's computer privileges...its that bastards fault about telling the others about your services...

[lbjeff]

Danny: Nice teeth. They would look better on my floor.

Jason, the most turned on he's been in his entire life: Okie. Yay❤️

Damian, listening through a bug: ??????

[lbjeff]

[lbjeff]

Dick after Jason dies: I'm a failure of a brother. I don't deserve family, much less younger siblings.

Tim: bonjorno person I imprinted on as a toddler. Can I help solve crimes too?

Dick:

Dick: curse my weak, adoptable heart

[lbjeff]

I know it sounds sensitive but what will happen when they “making love”?

Hal: what’s happening? Why everything shape in heart? What happened to triangle, rectangles or any other shape? Do you know what I feel when I went to toilet this morning and everything in it shape in heart?

Flash: why the sky is red with heart-like clouds? Is it rainbow look like two people kissing?

Superman: it is raining cloud candies out there. Like the whole worldwide is made with love only

Batman: … Where are Marvel and Phantom?

MM: You don’t wanna know

Diana: Do you know something, John?

MM: Lucky this time I figured it out early and blocked the connection with Phantom. But it almost give me a heart attack by having sugar rush. And I didn’t even know it could be possible for me

Do funny idea that popped into my head

Magic and death when mixed with each other make a really nice weird bubbly sensation dangerous to humans but when you don't really fit in that spectrum anymore it's more like really powerful emotions

Billy and Danny didn't know this at first when they started dating until they revealed their identities to each other

So every time they're busy at Captain Marvel and Phantom things around them get weird stuff turns colors it never been that color before gravity feels like it's off a bit or magic feels a bit wonky or ectoplasm turning a bright pink and popping and little heart bubbles

Billy and Danny don't know this yet but they're affecting everything around them since you're so deeply in love with each other

So imagine the Justice League reactions would feel them kisses Captain morgue on the cheek and somehow the sky is turned the bright dusty greenish pink yellow stripes inside for a couple of minutes we're going back

Batman's going to try to go super detective

But the whole idea is that Danny and Billy since they're so powerful or kind of accidentally messing with things around them cuz they look out little spurts of their own magic or energy anytime to showing really high emotions with each other

John: How I hate them.

Marvel and Phantom: *rub cheeks tenderly*

John's cigarette smoke curls into a heart shape.

Phantom kisses Marvel on the lips.

Flash: Why is the sky pink!?!

Superman: Do I hear a choir of angels?

Marvel hugs Phantom. They both smile contentedly.

Batman: *protects himself from the hearts that were flying off the two*

Oliver: *lying on the floor, a heart hit him, a look of pure pleasure on his face*

Hal: *sitting in the barrier* I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die.

Superman: Why are the clouds like cotton candy?

Marvel and Phantom were sleeping on one of the clouds nearby.

Scientist: Why are the stars shaped like hearts?!?

Marvel arranged a date with Phantom on the roof.

MM: *unconscious*

Flash: *pokes him with a stick* What happened to him?

Diana: He didn't know Phantom could break through his mental shields. Marvel gave Phantom something. The wave of joy was so strong that MM passed out.

Arthur: Because of you, a new species of fish appeared!!

Marvel: Is that good?

Arthur: She tries to have sex with everyone!!!

Dina: I know two lovebirds who can change the laws of reality just because of embarrassment or love.

Jazz: I know two guys who are sweeter than any candy.

[lbjeff]

Do funny idea that popped into my head

Magic and death when mixed with each other make a really nice weird bubbly sensation dangerous to humans but when you don't really fit in that spectrum anymore it's more like really powerful emotions

Billy and Danny didn't know this at first when they started dating until they revealed their identities to each other

So every time they're busy at Captain Marvel and Phantom things around them get weird stuff turns colors it never been that color before gravity feels like it's off a bit or magic feels a bit wonky or ectoplasm turning a bright pink and popping and little heart bubbles

Billy and Danny don't know this yet but they're affecting everything around them since you're so deeply in love with each other

So imagine the Justice League reactions would feel them kisses Captain morgue on the cheek and somehow the sky is turned the bright dusty greenish pink yellow stripes inside for a couple of minutes we're going back

Batman's going to try to go super detective

But the whole idea is that Danny and Billy since they're so powerful or kind of accidentally messing with things around them cuz they look out little spurts of their own magic or energy anytime to showing really high emotions with each other

John: How I hate them.

Marvel and Phantom: *rub cheeks tenderly*

John's cigarette smoke curls into a heart shape.

Phantom kisses Marvel on the lips.

Flash: Why is the sky pink!?!

Superman: Do I hear a choir of angels?

Marvel hugs Phantom. They both smile contentedly.

Batman: *protects himself from the hearts that were flying off the two*

Oliver: *lying on the floor, a heart hit him, a look of pure pleasure on his face*

Hal: *sitting in the barrier* I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die.

Superman: Why are the clouds like cotton candy?

Marvel and Phantom were sleeping on one of the clouds nearby.

Scientist: Why are the stars shaped like hearts?!?

Marvel arranged a date with Phantom on the roof.

MM: *unconscious*

Flash: *pokes him with a stick* What happened to him?

Diana: He didn't know Phantom could break through his mental shields. Marvel gave Phantom something. The wave of joy was so strong that MM passed out.

Arthur: Because of you, a new species of fish appeared!!

Marvel: Is that good?

Arthur: She tries to have sex with everyone!!!

Dina: I know two lovebirds who can change the laws of reality just because of embarrassment or love.

Jazz: I know two guys who are sweeter than any candy.

[lbjeff]

This happens a lot but pls credit me if you ever repost my art💔

[lbjeff]

Marvel: You know what hurts like bullets?

Villain: What?

Marvel: Bullets.

Marvel: *reloads gun*