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#Hope people now understand what I meant
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so it’s only adults who ship themselves with the turtles? like, if they’re in the fandom it doesn’t automatically mean they have fictional crushes on the main characters.
(rereading this it seems like. condescending for some fucking reason but i can’t think of another way to word it, so if it comes across that way to you too i’m so so sorry, i just wanted clarification on what you meant by that!!)
— sincerely, a newly 18 year old who’s confused as fuck lmao 👍
Don't apologize. I'll gladly clarify what I meant to clear some stuff up. I will mention the post was made while I was angry because of some TikToks and finding another pedo that ships herself with one of the turtles on TikTok.
So let me explain:
In that post I wanted to explain that adults that do ship themselves with the turtles or have a crush on them weren't allowed on my blog. Looking back it was worded rather poorly which I'll admit right now.
Now, not ALL and ONLY adults ship themselves with the turtles. There are some adults who ship their OCs with the turtles but they aren't self inserts of that said adult. This might be really confussing so I'm sorry but the point is.
The post was directed towards adults that do have crushes on the turtles or characters that are underaged and do ship themselves with the turtles and or even go as far as to make NSFW of them. And what you said is true, not all adults will automatically have a crush on the main characters or the turtles. That is true.
In short, the post was directed to adults that do ship themselves with the turtles and that are actual pedos.
I do apologize if the way I made that post was confusing or also condescending in a way. That wasn't my intention at all. I made the post while in a fit of anger which was kind of the reason it might have sounded that way.
To now say this short and simple: to any adult TMNT fan who does ship themselves with the turtles or crush on them, please leave my page and don't interact with me. You are nothing more then a pedo and a creep. This only goes to adults that do this kind of stuff, not all adults. I hope this clears some stuff a little.
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cats-in-the-clouds · 1 year
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idk if this has any merit to it so correct me if i’ve got the wrong idea but a thing i’ve been thinking lately is that the biblical dichotomy between jew and gentile (which new testament scripture teaches is no more) is sort of reborn in the modern dichotomy between like.,,, cradle catholic and random atheist/agnostic
point being, God will reach out to everyone. even those who aren’t doing all the little traditional rituals right, even those who don’t know what they’re doing, even those who just walked in out of nowhere. so the former need to remember to have humility and compassion for others who are trying their best to seek truth.
this is not to say the former are doing anything wrong by going through all those motions- of course not! and of course those motions aren’t insignificant; they’ve got so much history and tradition behind them. but ultimately they aren’t what save us. the foreign gentile who just showed up one day is baptized and saved. the deathbed convert is baptized and saved. funny how that is
the devout jewish people of the scriptures and the modern day hardcore tradcaths are neither better nor worse than other people- they are the people fortunate enough to be born in the ‘right’ environment, so encountering Christ and being saved will be much easier for them. but this also means they have a responsibility to do more.
and if they go haywire in the way they behave the consequences will be so much worse because of what they’re supposed to be representing (and i’m sure we all know that biblically the jewish people have caused lots of their own problems and presently. well. a lot of catholics Suck™️. we are all that person sometimes. often. usually)
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sowearecleariamhere · 1 month
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your blog feels the same kind of safe as the inside of the main hall at a woodcraft camp whilst the rain is chucking it down and now everyone's gathered by the fireplace because we can't have a campfire and we're singing songs and whispering to eachother and laughing because of the shadow puppet shows and we all feel safe and happy even though we feel cold
That is beautiful imagery! Thank you so much <3
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iniziare · 3 months
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Tag drop: Solas
#solas. [ what would you have had me say? that i was the great adversary in your people's mythology? ]#solas: ic. [ the dread wolf inspired hope in my friends and fear in my enemies. not unlike “inquisitor” i suppose. ]#solas: inquiries. [ let me help you. / you cannot. there is no glory here. only a price that i alone will pay. ]#solas: countenance. [ i was solas first. “fen'harel” came later. an insult i took as as a badge of honor. ]#solas: introspection. [ war breeds fear. fear breeds a desire for simplicity. good and evil. right or wrong. chains of command. ]#solas: meta. [ just remember; an enemy can attack but only an ally can betray you. betrayal is always worse. ]#solas: little notes. [ but nature is and always has been; grey. a spirit is a purpose. a demon is that purpose perverted. ]#solas: wishes. [ i walk the din'anshiral. there is only death on this journey. i would not have you see what i become. ]#solas: etc. [ i have people; seeker. the greatest triumphs and tragedies this world has known can all be traced to people. ]#solas: mythal. [ they killed her. a crime for which an eternity of torment is the only fitting punishment. ]#solas: elvhenan. [ imagine beings who lived forever for whom magic was as natural as breathing. that is what was lost. ]#solas: fade. [ everything is a memory; they are easily muddied. they contain truths but reason and sense are required to extract it. ]#solas: skyhold. [ there is a place that waits for a force to hold it. there is a place where the inquisition can build… grow. ]#solas: inquisition. [ you created a powerful organization. and now it suffers the inevitable fate of such; betrayal and corruption. ]#solas: inquisitor. [ you would risk everything you have in the hope that the future is better? what if it isn't? ]#solas: vhenan. [ what is the old dalish curse? “may the dread wolf take you”? ]#solas: dorian. [ is that a problem for you? / no. no. you're a special and unique snowflake. live the dream. ]#solas: varric. [ you know what i like about you? your boundless optimism. / it's comforting that what qualities i lack; you invent. ]#solas: cassandra. [ i am impressed by your honesty and faith. it is a difficult path; but if anyone can walk it honourably. you can. ]#solas: cole. [ never forget your purpose; cole. it is a noble one. even if this world does not understand. ]#solas: vivienne. [ i leave you with the greatest curse of my people. dirthara ma. / what rustic curse is that? / 'may you learn.' ]#solas: blackwall. [ you have seen a great deal of battle. / we all have. / not like you. you live and breathe war. it's home to you. ]#solas: sera. [ i suppose now you’ll switch to how i’m the same but different? / you are the furthest from what you were meant to be. ]#solas: bull. [ what you think is what you say and do. / even peasants may find freedom in the safety of thought; you take even that. ]
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caffeinatedopossum · 2 years
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Crying screaming and throwing up about the new owl house episode. I'm so autistic about this show. It means so so much to me.
Aghgjf not actually throwing up because emetophobia but definitely crying and screaming for real
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sometimes I think about The Last and want to scream
#I hate that I love it I hate that it's so out of pocket and uncalled for and downright out of line but SO COMPELLING AND FASCINATING#LIKE THE CHARACTER WORK THAT ONE AUDIO DOES IS INSANE???????#Everyone In This TARDIS (which is missing) Is Suicidal#and I am not even kidding they ARE#C'rizz seeing ghosts. he always sees dead people but this isn't that it's just that he's almost like them but not quite yet#he's always been haunted it just happens more now.#eight's failure and perception thereof he hates himself but still thinks he's the only one who can handle it but he can't handle it#charley who's been on the other end of it who knows what c'rizz has been through and done and who knows what it's like to be asked#STILL asking him to kill her if it comes to it even though she KNOWS it would shatter him bc it already HAS and it already shattered HER#and eight oh eight oh doctor at the end of his rope I am in fact always thinking about the way he says oh what the hell at the end of it#he doesn't care if he lives or dies he's at the end of his rope and has lost all hope he's failed everyone who loves him not only charley#who miraculously still trusts him to some degree even after he broke her into pieces not only charley who he loves#but also c'rizz who did still have that open honest trust in him c'rizz his hesitant beginning to be friend#c'rizz who he understands and who understands him bc the kinship and silent bond between them existed even then#someone remind me to go get my rant on scaredy cat's importance and spruce it up I need to talk about it#because the doctor did love c'rizz too he DID charley was wrong!!! the writers were wrong!!! everyone was wrong about them!!!#he LOVED him but it was so different as to be almost unrecognizable I'm going to CRY#THEY MEANT SO MUCH TO EACH OTHER ALL THREE OF THEM THEY COULDN'T EXIST WITHOUT EACH OTHER ANYMORE#THEY LOST ONE THEN THE OTHER AND NONE OF THEM WAS THE SAME ANYMORE#only in the Last it happened in the wrong order. not the way it was supposed to be.#Lu rambles#dweu#meta finding tag#eighth doctor#charley pollard#c'rizz
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nerdnag · 1 year
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I hope everyone who reads this is having a better day than I am 🙏
#Away on a work thing for a couple of days and while my work situation has started to improve it's still not great in many aspects#Things can't just become amazing in no time I understand that#The main difference now from a month ago is that I now have someone who has my back#And who is systematically working to relieve me of a lot of burdensome work#And she is great. She is amazing. She really DOES have my back and I feel hopeful for the future. She cares.#But I still have coworkers (especially one of them) who are treating me so unfairly#I had to go to my hotel room and cry over the phone with my partner earlier today#Because I've worked my fucking ass off for such a long time to do good things and help my coworkers#And try to get us out of impossible situations as best as I can#And this is in no way meant to be a brag I just want to be extremely clear here about what's going on:#Without me they would be out of a job. Because I've been tearing myself into a million tiny pieces to hold the company together.#And what I get in return is literally... Complaints. And negativity. And annoyed comments about how they wish things could be better.#And the things they DO SEE that are GOOD they do not attribute to me at all#They have barely even thanked me for anything I have done#And I am supposed to fucking sit there. And smile. And be pleasant. And be social with them and have a haha good fun time with them.#But I am just so sick and tired of working my ass off for people who don't even care.#I don't even think anyone realises it but I am *this close* to just saying fuck it and quitting.#The only thing that's keeping me from doing that right now is the fact that this person who is slowly making things better for me DOES CARE#She is slowly realizing just how much of the company I'm carrying on my back and how close I am to collapsing under the ungrateful weight#And she has made it very clear to me that she will help me. That she sees me and supports me and that she will get things off my back.#And I really truly believe her#But if for some reason she would disappear... I don't think I can stay here anymore#So this is really the last chance I'm giving it#Anyway it will all turn out okay. I'm sure it will.#I'm just so disappointed and angry and sad right now#I've just suffered through a long dinner with them all and now I have escaped to my hotel room#I am going to comfort-binge Netflix for the rest of the night and try to be kind to myself.#Sorry for the long-ass vent#I'm impressed if you got this far#Tw vent
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irlnikeiyomiuri · 1 year
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guys did i ever tell u abt my bestie in 8th grade. we were so fucking close genuinely attached at the hip and then we went into ninth grade and covid, and then i saw him again at senior hoco and it was great and then i saw him at senior prom and it was fucking nasty he ain’t even greet me even though we hung out w the same group of people the whole night.
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that moment when: everyone's lives are restricted and constricted and these imposed consequences are attributed to anyone's continual individual failures to seek, find, and follow the Correct Path through Life, and so everyone is left on their own to only be seeking & finding these failures as well as the only answer to how their lives can be better....versus Not seeing the world as the free marketplace meritocracy of everyone's personal failures/successes, nor everything in your own life, and thus not forever having to scrutinize Where You Must Be Bringing It Upon Yourself by fucking up or at least failing to do the correct thing, and exist only in perpetual punishment for your ongoing failure and occasional temporary reprieves from it. recognizing everything that wasn't & isn't & wouldn't be [this is because you're bringing it upon yourself] and thus having more capacity & capability to look at the realm of your personal individual self, reality, experiences, life through the perpetual instances of seeking, finding, and following your own needs/wants through one's inherent personhood and exercises of autonomy and recognition of where & when & how one recognizes moments of their existing freely & in more resonant genuine alignment with themself, you know? endless examples to be found in endless fractals of [where & how are people's lives made smaller]. and that of course this doesn't preclude the ability/option at any time to question one's choices, since you'll be able to find more Actual choices available to you (and, also crucially, find more actual choices made by others that are in the pursuit of limiting Yours) to look at, and people getting to exercise their autonomy isn't the same as "everyone doing anything they want regardless of how it affects others" since that [how does it affect others?] element instead being Regarded would be able to lead to recognizing that, in fact, an effect might be the infringement on others' autonomy, hence: There's A Problem....like the ability to just go ham with [questioning???] anything in existence, certainly including oneself, b/c the "norm" is such that rather you're only supposed to be able to question yourself for your failings (or those positioned as less than, thus, beneath you) and not even have the language to express a questioning of aspects of life beyond that b/c stop calling anyone "cis" they're just Normal, Just Be Normal and it would all be fine
#brought to you by: i think one of my feelings lately of A Shift is in my less than ever running this like continuous background function of#looking for Thee Answer (just like the black suits) in any & everything that could serve as the Key to like. whatever could fit into place#to like set things on a [hell yeah. life? better] path. juxtaposing this recent sense of things with the [lol. in retrospect i Do see a new#context wherein i can Recognize smthing abt myself] past going on of like. granpa greentext story be me be fifteen i'm in college b/c i hat#school i also mostly assumed i'd probably fail out freshman yr but didn't. i've never known what i'd wanna major in & as a sophomore i'm de#supposed to figure it out in time for scheduling my jr yr classes (though Ideally have known from the start / been scheduling thusly) & so#many evenings during dinner i'm furiously perusing the daily print news as i've been doing for some yrs to Keep Up W/Current Events but now#also consciously like ''boy i hope in the course of doing this i stumble across some info that sparks some eureka moment of Getting what my#major should Obviously be so i can understand the rest of my life around [do job] b/c i sure as hell don't understand it around [be married#much less [be parent] so one option remains obvi'' whereas now i realize like lol you Were figuring out a guiding light in doing so & that#perspective being honed was one of Having A Political Analysis times....which also provides another Example of [only being able to interpre#what makes your life & your world the way it is: via Your Personal Failures to have already Had Better] in that just like i often forget i#misguidedly (but also reasonably; clearly also using & seeking that autonomy & freedom) tried to have a better existence within the#situation i was in by Coming Out As Trans to parents via an email that was then not directly discussed ever; b/c any legitimate discussion#was not permissible like how so many matters of [supposed correct existence] are Unspeakable so as to be Unquestionable#languaging that succeeds & sustains itself having to be expansive / flexible / creative / evolving too. Making Up Words hell yes#anyways so i also forget i Did try to propose majoring in things that Did more approach what i was suspecting were things i'd wanna do#but even the first like expression of anything on the periphery of that was met with ''no you'd hate it b/c you'd have to deal w/Stupid Ppl#every day'' (by which was meant; with believed inherent synonymity: poor people) & then i also will oft forget i pushed for it any further#which i Know i did b/c of it next being met with angry & aggressive ''i've never heard you talk abt that interest before So''#(wonder why? withholding info to protect yourself=finding room in one's life for existing more freely; exercising the autonomy to Do That)#but it's easy to forget b/c The All Encompassing Perspective was rather [i'm sure Failing to just Know my major for the sole possibility fo#defining one's entire life: The Correct Dream Job] & then Failing to push it or just express it & be understood ''correctly'' even if i Did#have any ideas in that realm. vs seeing how i Was succeeding & was recognizing shit & pursuing it & looking out for myself & etccc#it's undeniable lol like the framing even that Blaming Oneself is an autonomy seeking response. b/c your autonomous power in your own life#sure Would be more immediate if Everything Really Was Your Fault (when ofc really this is abt obscuring & denying the responsibility of ppl#who have the power over others' lives & then have to act like this is all the fault of the Others; they themselves have never Truly Chosen)#no victim blaming no condemnation of anyone's ''passivity'' here babey#re: the undeniability it's how like. maybe you've only Just realized you're not cis but in doing so it's like ''oh That's what i already#recognizing in various ways throughout my whole life'' it's all always Been there/going on & perspex shifts + new lenses can reveal them
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btw i think one of the most impt hobbies in the world is having a mostly non-existent, mostly self indulgent crush on a professor/lecturer just to zone out to their classes to and focus instead on their hair and their hands and their dark circles speaking NAWT from experience. maybe a little bit.
#yeah he's got me a lil crazy i was doing dishes this morning thinking abt all the things i still have to do this week#bc we have his exam on friday and im trying to determine whether i should try to do some prep work or just leave it for the day of#& i was just thinking abt like. oh he's so fucking precious he like actively took the time over winter break to memorise the names of#the people who consistently show up to class and like its cause he's sweet and wants to eventually teach more focussed smaller groups#but like my man my absolute angel you have accidentally stumbled upon the number one surefire way to make people wanna keep coming to class#like his classes r great but mostly i like that he knows who i am#and like i was thinking abt like. we were talking abt language in art movements like dadaism and i asked if he'd read embassytow#-n and he said he hadnt but that he had a list of student recs i'd be on and then in a later class i asked if he read fever dream and he#like made the joke that he'd have a section in his list of just things i told him to read#You Dont Understand I Need This Man Carnally. THIS is what one direction meant when they said thats what makes u beautiful#fuck me i hope he has this effect on the ladies cause if not hey babe there's a whole world out here for you ready to be explored#its also jst funny bc we r genuinely all afflicted by this tragic desire of him i think its partially bc his classes r a little boring#again love him to bits he does try his best its just rly surface level shit because it has to be within the nature of his classes#anyway. convincing myself not to fail his class on purpose so i can retake it next year its going poorly#also just had like a rly long convo w him after class once and he's just. URGH SO SWEET IM LEAVING. IM GOING AWAY NOW.#dreamboy... ugh ! AND he's a poet professionally !!!
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dawnwriterimagines · 2 months
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The Guilty Plea
SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY x FEM!READER TASK FORCE 141 x FEM!READER
Traitors Among Us (Part 1) and Innocents Among You (Part 2)
Verdict Due (Part 4)
Summary: As you're discharged from the infirmary, under watchful eye, you head to Laswell to talk on the rest of your now ruined military career. Of course, you're forced to confront your team as it happens, the last people on earth you'd like to see.
If you liked this would you Buy me a Coffee?
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Running your fingers along the raised, pink scar across you cheek, the feeling of it...it really looked terrible. A part of you thought it would disappear, hoped it would, but it didn't. It just became severely more noticeable. Looking at this, you knew you'd always have to think of it. You'd sport this reminder for the rest of your life.
Looking away from it, you find your own tired eyes in the mirror, you haven't been sleeping well. Or at all. You can't remember the last time you got 4 hours, let alone 8. Dark circles still surrounded them but at least the bruising and the swelling had gone down.
You couldn't recognize yourself. Not really.
This woman looked so exhausted, so frail and so goddamn angry. It was accurate, it was how you felt. All of it. So, you supposed that the mirror's reflection was the truth, this was you indeed.
"If you need another day or two, no one will ask questions."
You glance over towards your psychologist, your fucking therapist, a nice little 'gift' sent over by the bureau to check in on your mental state after your ordeal. Glaring at him through the reflection of your mirror, he sighs, putting down his pen that slaps against his notepad, "I can't help you if you don't talk to me."
"I'm going to Laswell." Ignoring his statement, you speak. "I'm ready. I'll pack up. Get back to base. Vera had me discharged from the infirmary. I can start ov--"
"Vera?"
"My nurse. You met her," you continued, annoyance spiking at the interruption. Your wrist brace squeaking quietly under the pressure of your fist tightening beneath the table.
"Right..."
"Do you listen to a word I say outside of...my 'trauma'?" You wonder, bluntly.
Your psychologist blinks, surprised, before clearing his throat, appalled. "If you feel I can be more attentive to your state of well-being throughout our process, than by all means--"
"Oh, so 'no'?" you lean back into your seat, a strained laugh leaving you. His lips press together and you continue before he can find the words. "Because whenever I mention leaving this fucking team, you either adjust our schedule for another two weeks or suggest hypnotic therapy, as if I need anyone else digging around to fuck up my mental state."
"I never meant to imply--"
"Oh, you implied it," you interrupted, gritting your teeth. "I know what I want. And I want off Task Force 141."
He taps at the leather of his notebook. "Scars heal, just remember that, Ms. (L/n). The reminders of your experience shouldn't have to haunt you."
"It's not the scars, I've had my share way before this," you admitted, rising to your feet. You exhale deeply that tells to the effort of it, the steel gear hinges along your leg braces shift with your change of position. Still getting use to them. "It's the person."
"Has she changed, you think?" the psychologist begins to write, getting somewhere.
"She doesn't exist anymore."
Finally, placing the mirror down and onto the side table, you pushed off of the table, rolling your IV pole along with you. Passing the chair your psychologist sits on, he closes his notebook with a frustrated huff, looking over his shoulder. "Session over for you already, Ms. (L/n)?" he sighs. "We've still got the hour."
"I'm done," you take the knob in your hand. Turning.
In more ways than one.
"You understand that, informing your captain on your leave is required of you. Have you spoken to any of them, in the last few weeks?" he spoke up, quickly. "I'm sure giving them a space to open up, share from their view--"
"Why should I care--"
"--will give you better understanding, better clarity of the situation they were in--
Appalled. "What the fuck?" Jamming the door closed with a loud, shuttering thud, you whip around. "IT'S NOT ABOUT THEM!" you could just rip your hair out. "Who--who says that to someone?!"
Your psychologist sits there, eyes wide in confusion. "What--"
"Christ, can you hear me? Can you--can you see me? I've got metal plates in my spine, braces holding my knees in place and nerve damage that'll never heal! Who gives a fuck about them!" your skin feels red hot, your face twisted in rage. "I gave my life! My life to this! And then I'm tortured, I'm threatened, drugged and beaten by my own team, my f--my family for eight fucking years..."
You continue with a heavy chest. "And I'm supposed to invite them for dinner to talk and listen them bitch and moan about why they thought it was necessary to beat me to death for two weeks?! Fuck you!" you spat. "I don't owe them anything!"
"That's not what I was trying to say, Ms. (L/N). I apologize, I overstepped. Come sit down--"
"Of course you meant it," you interrupted, mock humor. "Don't be a pussy, own up to it. Revel in your truth. Be tter yet--" you snatch a journal from the cabinet. Tossing it his way. "Make a note of it."
Turning the knob, you leave the room with a slam of the metal door.
---
You were officially famous. On the base, you were now a legend.
A story that would be mentioned and told at lunch for months. Probably years.
First, you were a rat. Next, you were innocent. This was the most gossip any of those in service had ever seen in their years of service.
An interesting reminder to those in service that you weren't safe off duty either.
You learned a few days ago that there was an update put into the interrogational unit, something about how to properly go about dissecting evidence and being on the lookout for enemy spies in the militia.
You guessed you had been told about it in an effort to be appeased by the thought that the head of control paid attention to anything beyond their own noses for once. But, you had little to no faith in a system that's nearly killed you on and off the field by now, so it didn't matter.
You doubted the new rules would be followed though, there was a plethora of things they'd done to you in that cell that were both illegal and unsanctioned. Most of all, that were expected towards an enemy, a prisoner of war at best, and not a fellow marine.
You arrive at the housing quarters, swiping your key card, pulling the handle and entering the wing. Immediately, you're greeted by a dozen eyes, conversations stopping short and clothes ruffling to silence, suddenly whispers fill the space and eyes turn away.
"Oh, god, it's her..." says one man in the far corner.
"Shut the fuck up, man!" came a harsh whisper back.
"I didn't know it was that bad..."
All those eyes on you, makes you pause in your step, looking around at all of your fellow soldiers, the men and women you've served with for years. Many you recognized, ate with, fought beside that turned their backs to you now. Out of respect? Out of distaste, morale, nerves, pity, it all didn't matter. It all felt the same.
The wheels attached to your IV pole suddenly sounded much too loud on the polished flooring, as you walked down the hall as fast as you were able to.
Breathing out deeply, you get to an elevator, pushing on the button, once, twice, three times, just open goddamn it.
With a ding, the metal doors open, and suddenly you're aware that people could be in the elevator, they could be in this elevator, he could be in this elevator. Your eyes flicker down to the floor, your grip on the pole of your iv tightens, your shoulders stiffen, waiting for a blow that will never come.
You stand there as the doors open up, the small space empty, the metal walls reflect only her and a streak of lighting from the ceiling.
Looking up slowly, finally taking a breath, before sliding the iv up and onto the elevator, following it as you press your floor number along the way.
The ride up is fast, a little rumble as it stops, and then the doors open. Faster than you were prepared for.
Peeking out down the hallway, luckily no one to bump into, which you were thankful for. But, it didn't make this hall any less haunting. You'd been cornered in this same hall, you could recall being hauled out of the room after the solid handle of a knife hits your temple.
You don't go down fast enough, whipping around as you stumble to take the wrist of your attacker, mostly for balance, it's Price. In shock, you're unprepared as Johnny's arm encircle your neck, locking you into position as you both stumble backwards onto the floor. He blocks your airways, hushing you harshly as you struggle, feet kicking out and your vision blurring as your team surrounds you. Your family.
That was quite the headache to wakeup with afterwards.
You hadn't quite remembered until now. Being back served as a hell of a kickstart to your memory.
Just a few more reasons to get the fuck off of 141.
Getting off the elevators, the metal doors sliding closed behind you, you make your way down the hall. The polished flooring creates a subtle squeak through the wheels of your iv pole, your hand absently running over the fading stitches along your side.
Passing the shadows of your tortured memory, the doorway of the office was closed, locked.
You pass Kyle's room.
Johnny's.
Finally, you rush up to the next room on the left, grabbing the handle, before beginning to twist, but then you're yanking your hand back as if the metal had burned you. Your back ramming into the back wall, catching yourself, this wasn't your room.
It was Simon's.
You'd spent hours, days, in that room. More than your own.
Why wouldn't you? You were about to get married to the man. You had more in this room than you had in yours.
Sharp breaths leave you, shivering in your effort to keep yourself together, your head goes back into the wall, swallowing down the ache in your chest.
You wait, muscles tensed and your body pressing back into the wall, hoping it'd absorb you if that door opens. Listening for every sound, any pin drop, even an exhale from beyond that doorway. Luckily, Simon seemed to be out for the day.
Hurriedly, nearly running, you steady yourself against the wall as you rush down to the corner of the hallway, finally finding your room.
Turning the handle, it's not locked, it's broken. It opens with ease.
Entering the room slowly, pushing the doorway aside, the crackle of glass beneath your boots as you step forwards, clothes and picture frames laying scattered.
The mattress flipped and ripped open, springs and cotton cut from it. Your wall of metals and certificates, from acts of bravery and mementos of valor, discarded, later you'd find them in the trash, one with a bullet lodged into the gold.
Sniffling as you leaned down, picking a specific frame off the ground, the only one that hadn't been broken. Laying along the ruined rug, with no care for the glass digging through your jeans, you stare at the still shot of your family.
The only family you had outside of Task Force 141, your father and his sister, military brats themselves, until their retirement. Your mother had passed, or just up and left, days after your 5th birthday, you weren't completely sure, the story kept changing every year. But, these two were the only family you've ever known, ever had, until you joined the military, following in their footsteps.
They'd been so proud when you arrived back after your first assignment, in truth you were heavily traumatized, but seeing them, you just had to smile. Having a family that understood the harsh toll on the line of a trooper, now a lieutenant, it was always easier to bring your troubles to them. But, they were also military nuts so "suck it up" was also a quick go to answer from your aunt, while your father was the smoother talker.
They had met Simon, loved him, his rank, his love for you, his seriousness. They trusted him completely with your heart.
So, when he called them, after the evidence leaked...
They believed him.
"What're you talking about?" You took the handle of the chair in your grip, easing you down into it as your legs do weak at what you were hearing. "I didn't...I didn't do it, Dad."
"Do you know how humiliating and disappointing--how it felt to hear him say that to me, hm?" he says, static crackles on the reciever. "My daughter...my own flesh and blood...working with terrorists--"
"I'm not working with anyone! Are you-" you huff out a breath of disbelief. "Are you even listening to me? I've never betrayed the code. How can you think that way of me?"
For a moment, he's silent. "Alright, then," he began. "Than, what'd you do? huh?"
"What--what..."
"Oh, come on, (Y/n)!" your father yells. "What did you do?! What could they possibly have had on you that made you the most likely target? You had to have had done something, been somewhere, were with somebody you weren't supposed to be with! They didn't just get that information from anywhere."
"What the fuck--" Your expression twists with frustration and misery, running your hand through your hair, pulling at it. "I've sacrificed every part of myself for this job, for this team, what do I have to gain from throwing that all away? They send me everywhere, places you've never heard of, places you'll never hear about and people you'll never have to meet, because of me! Why would you just believe Simon? Why couldn't you just wait to talk to me?!"
Hearing your father scoff at your words was painful. "What reason do I have not to believe him? He knows you, maybe even better than any of us. Besides, he was going to be my son in law--"
"I'm your daughter! Fuck Simon, what about me? You'd believe him instead?"
He sighs. "Listen, you're upsetting Cass. We didn't expect your call. I gotta make this brief..."
"You're upset?" pulling at your hair, sucking in sharply. "I'm the one who's permanently fucking altered here. What do either of you have to be upset about?!"
"Watch your fucking mouth!" he seethes. The anger in his voice isn't new, but the way he spits it at you is. "You did this to yourself, I didn't. Maybe that's what your nightmares were about, am I right? Your guilt?"
Wiping the streaks of tears that had fallen down your face, lips quivering and chest aching with sobs you frustratedly shoved down. "Why don't you believe me?"
"I don't deserve the disgrace that will come with you as my kin, I've lived my part of this war. No daughter of mine should even be in this fucking position," your father spat, disgusted into the receiver. Suddenly, he was the cruel, bitter old man your mother had always known him to be, you wished she had stayed to at least remind you of that. Maybe it wouldn't have hurt as much. "You should be ashamed of yourself, but at least you got yourself out it. The least you could do for us."
"Well--what does that mean?" you spoke, quietly.
"Don't call again..."
"Dad, no--" you break this time, a sob escaping you.
"Me and your Aunt Cass..."
"Daddy please, don't do this--"
"..We've decided to cut ties. We're not taking any heat from this, you're on your own," he finishes, clearing his throat, waiting a moment, listening to the pleads and cries of his only daughter, his once pride. "You take care of yourself. Goodbye, kid."
"Why can't you just believe me? Why?!" you cried.
"Don't come to the house."
"No, no,--" the line goes dead. And staring down at your phone, his caller id going blank and the call disconnecting.
Your phone all of a sudden feels heavy, the device and your hand falling down to your thigh, before the phone slips out of your grip and onto the floor. You sit there silently, until your tears drop up and even after.
Staring at the photo now was haunting in its own way, it was just another painful reminder.
Using the bed frame to stand to your feet, your grip on the frame is painful as you squeeze it, the glass cracks audibly.
"Bonnie..."
Whipping around at the sound of John MacTavish's voice, you back up a few steps at the sight of him, your back hitting the edge of your desk.
He reaches out as you stumble, before his fingers curl back into his palm as you find your balance, his hands receding back to his sides. He doesn't enter the room, just lingering just beyond the doorway, his eyes flickering around the room, guiltily.
"I didn't know--we didn't know you were out," he speaks quietly, as opposed prideful personality that translated into his voice usually.
You say nothing.
In the dark, your eyes are wide and your shoulders are tensed up, he can see the glint of your leg braces, the iv pole at the side, the scar beneath your eye. You looked terrified to see him.
"We were coming back to clean up today, just got back from...from a mission..." he stutters on his words, shifting his feet.
"It's been a week."
His lips press together hearing your voice. "I know..." Johnny glances around at the room he'd let those officers destroy, it hadn't been them, but they might as well had done it. "I know...we just...didn't know it was so bad."
"Really?" your voice is mockingly sweet, drawing out the word. "You didn't know? Well look..." you hold up your family photo, the light in the hallway catching on the glass. "You missed one."
Your hand dropping, the heavy frame comes down just as fast, ramming into the ground, the glass practically exploding on impact.
Johnny flinches, the photo of your family...He looks back to you, surprised. "Bonnie..."
Snatching the next closest thing from your desk, a ceramic cup. "Oh, wow, can't believe you guys missed this one," you chuck it into the wall. It breaks on impact, the remains scatter along the flipped mattress and onto the floor. "That used to be my favorite mug by the way."
The Scotsman worriedly steps forwards, 'Lass, I'm sorry--"
"FUCK YOU!" you spat, coming into the light. You're sure you look deranged, and you didn't care. You could've wrapped your hands around his throat, killed him right on the floor and you wouldn't have blinked. "It doesn't mean anything! 'I'm sorry', 'I'm sorry', 'I'm sorry', over and over and over again! As if you shouldn't be! Your apologies mean fuck all."
"I know...I know," he breathes. "But, I've gotta say it anyway, bonnie. I should've believed you, there was no reason not to. I know that now. I just--"
"Believe me!" you cut him off with a yell. "Trust me! Fucking 'HELP ME'!" you screamed with the same fever as your days in the interrogation room, that terrible cell, the cold, the burn and pain. "I cried it all to you, to all of you, and nobody came. Nobody came for me," you breathe in sharply. "It doesn't matter what you should've done. You didn't do it!"
Johnny's eyes are red, he opens his mouth, closes it and then swallows down whatever chokes him up as he looks at you. "I should've came for you. I wish I did. I wanted to, Bonnie..." he steps forwards, and you recede back away from him, your eyes narrowed with violence. "I'll never forgive myself for not listening to you. For not coming to help you. For laying a hand on you. I'm so sorry, (Y/n). I'm sorry..."
I'll never forgive myself... "That makes two of us," you assured.
Johnny's eyes widen, before they close, his guilt ever consuming. He can't help but understand, to respect your decision, to know things can never be ok again. "(Y/n)...."
Grabbing hold of the nearest thing, a pencil cup, you hurl it at Johnny. He doesn't put his hands up, flinching as it hits him, the metal clinking against his kevlar, eyes closing then opening, he stands still. "I don't forgive. I don't accept your apology. I don't fucking care about it!" with each sentence you throw something else his way, a broken frame, the trash bin, a pillow, the CD player.
His hand has to come up for the knife you unsheathe, a memento from one of your missions, it's rusted, ancient probably. But, you hadn't given it up to a museum or to pawn, you had nearly died on this mission, saving Johnny ironically. You had to keep it.
Seeing the weapon, his defensive position is instinctive but his hands drop just as fast, he understands, you need this. You deserve this. "If you need to..." he speaks. Your eyes flicker up to him, away from the knife. "If you need to, I get it..."
And you need to. You really fucking do.
Your grip on the knife is dangerously hard, it hurts.
Looking at Johnny, he'd been your brother in more than a few ways on and off the field, he had been your comfort, your friend, your family. You had bled with him, held onto him as he carried you from the battlefield, joked, laughed, screamed and cried. You've loved him for years.
He'd had a rough few nights you could see that. He was quieter, reserved. Almost as terrified to see you, as you had been of him.
And you could kill him right now and never bat an eye.
And so, throwing that knife was so fucking easy.
Johnny's eyes close as you do just that, fists clenching and teeth biting down on his tongue to prepare for the pain.
The ancient weapon whiz's through the air, the sound is sharp and he knows it will cut through him like butter.
The thud rings in the room, and Johnny's eyes blow open wide, holding his breath as he collapses to his knees, before turning to you.
You dig into the pile of clothes that had been cast aside, a pair of sneakers and a new shirt. You don't look at him a single time as you take it all, stuffing them in a bag, and leaving the room, passing him completely, a limp in your step.
Johnny releases a pained breath, tears finally leaving him as he looks up, the knife lodged into the frame of the doorway, just barely missing him. The sleeve of his uniform ripped open.
He sits there in the quiet, destroyed room. A testimony to the relationship he's destroyed between you.
Part 4!! OUT NOW
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tellafairy · 10 days
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get anything you desire overnight; what is SATS? how do i use it? — a quick guide.
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STATS is short for “state akin to sleep,” a phrase used by neville goddard several times.
for example, one of neville's most popular experiments utilizing SATS is called the "ladder experiment". this experiement demonstrates how useful sats is.
what was the experiment?
1. During one of his lectures, Neville instructed his students to visualize themselves climbing a ladder vividly. He asked them to repeatedly imagine this scenario in detail each night before going to bed. They were to feel themselves climbing the ladder, using all their senses to make it as real as possible.
2. on top of this, Neville told them to write down or say affirmations throughout the day such as, "I will not climb a ladder." This was meant to consciously contradict their nightly visualizations, creating a sense of disbelief in the process. The challenge was to see whether their repeated visualization of the ladder would override the conscious denial of the event.
3. Many of the participants reported that within a few days, despite their daily affirmation of "I will not climb a ladder," they ended up encountering situations in which they physically climbed a ladder. The experiment was intended to show that the subconscious mind, which was being impressed by the vivid visualization during the SATS state, was far more powerful than their conscious thoughts or affirmations.
essentially, Neville wanted to show that imagination, particularly when focused in the relaxed state akin to sleep, could create real-life outcomes, aka — attract your desires instantly.
so . . . how do i use SATS?
1. relax. sit or lie down, and relax your mind and body. this method does not need to be used at night. many people have used it during the day and have gone to sleep for only a few moments before waking up with their desire. This is basically just a form of meditation. A similar mental state occurs naturally in the morning right after awakening, and in the evening before bed, hence why some may prefer to do this method at night despite it not being mandatory.
2. embody the feeling. now while in this state, visualize your goal. Feel your desire completely. want someone to text you? imagine yourself opening your phone to that text message. want a new car? imagine yourself feeling the interior, smelling the new car freshener, testing out the radio. whatever it is, fully immerse yourself in the desire.
3. focus and persist. loop this desire on repeat as you fall asleep, it should be the only focus on your mind. quickly shift any other thoughts that may appear, back onto your desire. the more you do this, the more you'll feel the desire completely.
brief comments;
1. over time, it becomes more and more natural. it's very easy to get into the habit of using SATS to manifest whatever you desire. i often find myself using it without even intending to, just randomly deciding i want something and it becomes all i think about as i fall asleep. it's a very natural method that's easy to custom to.
2. yes, you can use this for shifting realities. there's a reason why so many people "randomly" shift when they stop using long complicated methods and just go to sleep with their DR in mind.
3. you don't need to take action. you don't necessarily need to do anything when manifesting. this doesn't just apply for SATS, but any other form of manifestation. you don't need to take action or do anything further to get your desires if you don't feel like it. remember; they're already yours. they can fall into your hands out of the blue. you don't need to put in effort.
i used several different articles and videos for this to explain it in the most simple way possible, since i know a lot of people tend to struggle with understanding this stuff to the maximum!! so i hope this is easy to read! ૮ ◞ ⸝⸝ ◟ ྀིა
4. does this mean affirmations don't work?
no, it does not. affirmations DO still work for LOA. you CAN achieve anything through affirmations, it was never stated that you couldn't or that SATS is the only way. this only states that according to neville goddards experiement, sats appears to be a more powerful method than affirmations and that's how he viewed it. more powerful doesn't equate to the other method being completely incorrect or impossible. i also personally find this method to work a lot quicker as well.. similar to the void state.
edit; i didn't realize i wrote stats in the title and not sats lol, my mistake it was autocorrect
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nightingale-prompts · 24 days
Text
Comforting Your Batboy
First | Previous | Next
Danny slept next to Dick for a few days after what happened. He no longer felt secure about his place here. No matter where you go you take yourself with you and Danny is the problem here yet again.
Danny didn't understand affection, at least not the kind that a parent gave. The moment Danny told Dick that his parents were scientists Richard understood. Gotham had seen dozens of scientists who pushed the boundaries of morality and there was no shortage of children used to fulfill their ambitions.
Danny still missed his parents. Regardless of how things ended, he had lived his entire life with a family unit that on paper meant life was stable. He had somewhere to go and people who at least acknowledged him as family. Parents that took care of him at least out of obligation.
This story sounded familiar. Like Jason who never stopped loving his mom despite everything or Tim who accepted his neglect as what it was. They didn't know what it was like to have parents that loved them like they should. Dick was lucky to have the parent he had.
Danny remembered quiet dinners as his parents rushed to finish the food that Jazz made or them going on long tirades about their research. For 12 years they devotedly worked on that portal. Every chance they got they'd run off to the basement. Because it was their life's work, the only thing that mattered.
When it was unveiled, Jazz only scoffed. She hated the portal. Dad looked to Danny for praise and Danny didn't know what to say.
"Isn't it just the greatest thing you've ever seen?" Dad put his hand around Danny's shoulder.
"Well...its definitely a thing." Danny laughed awkwardly.
Danny had hoped that when the portal finished it would mean he'd spend time with his parents. Maybe they'd give him more than a passing glance when he brought them his report card. He could share with them his dreams and plans to be an astronaut. Show them the stars and all his research. To prove to them that he was a scientist too.
But that didn't happen. None of that would ever happen.
Jazz warned him not to hope for too much.
"People don't change Danny." She said simply.
Danny still tried. He still hoped. That hope made him try.
That hope killed him.
Danny never told Dick the specifics, about the accident. Dick never pried, but he knew something wasn't right.
Danny would cry in his sleep some nights. Dreams of a life that was far away now. Dick couldn't do much, all he could do was hold Danny's hand and wait for the nightmare to pass in hopes that Danny would forget his dream when he opened his eyes.
Danny's body was scarred. Something he used his powers to cover but they were still there and appeared when the stress got too much. Dick only saw a small part of them.
Dick got a full view once of Danny's back once when Dick left him a change of clothes. Lichtenberg scars like feathered ferns ripped through Danny's left arm and back. Danny hated it when people saw his scars and the marks disappeared the moment he realized he was being watched.
Dick didn't mention it. Not even the faint green glow the marks gave off.
"Why does Batman hate me?" Danny asked peeking out from under his blanket. He was still shrunk down
Dick bundled the toddler up in the blanket.
"He doesn't hate you. He just...he doesn't like things he doesn't understand." Dick tried to not make that sound awful.
"He doesn't understand me." Danny sighed.
"And he doesn't have to. He won't do anything to you. Not with me around. I promise. I know you've been hurt before and you must have felt alone but you got me." Dick ruffled his little fuzzball's hair.
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(Ignore small errors. Have bat picture.)
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theonottsbxtch · 2 months
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Secret Sister | OP81
in which lando has a secret sister and oscar falls hard and fast
oscar piastri x norris!reader
fc: sophia birlem
a/n: lol hello this is my first ever smau, everyone say thank you rianna. hope you enjoy this and if you have any requests lmk!
landonorris:
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liked by ynnorris, oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell and 1376 more
happy 21st birthday to this gremlin, ig being your big brother is fun or whatever @/ynnorris
*tap to load comments*
userone: i’m sorry i beg your pardon what
usertwo: someone say sike rn
maxfewtrell: lando you’re going to break the internet with this post
userthree: a bit too late
userfour: YOU KNEW?!
ynnorris: guys i’ve been held captive for 21 years. dobby is free!
yourbestfriend: how long have you been waiting to say that?
ynnorris: 3 years
userfive: how did lando manage to pull this off for so long?!
oscarpiastri: you have a sister??
maxverstappen1: lando what?
usersix: it’s the way lando just hardlaunched that he had a sister for me 😭
alex_albon: I KNEW IT
georgerussell63 : i’m so sorry i never believed you
alex_albon: i was onto him back in 2019, you guys just thought i was delusional😞
userseven: moral of the story, always trust alex
ynnorris
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liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell and 47 others
hello world. twenty first and graduation? now you guys know who the smartest norris is xx
*tap to load comments*
landonorris: you’re public for one day and you already start publicly bullying me wtf
userone: oh i like her already
usertwo: sorry did i just see she graduated in computer science? from edinburgh? we love an educated queen
yourbestfriend: world’s hottest programmer
ynnorris: get it on a top
yourbestfriend: yes ma’am
userthree: why did she have to wait until her 21st to post? i’m so confused 😭
userfour: maybe lando didnt want her to be in the limelight and now that she’s an adult she’s in control of it?
userthree: oh that makes sense
ynnorris: he just didn’t want people to know that his sister is 100x cooler than him
userfive: yn pls 😭😭😭
oscarpiastri: hello
ynnorris: hello
landonorris: not happening
usersix: oh no poor lando 😭
maxverstappen1: @/landonorris i refuse to believe she’s real, tell her to come to monaco with a birth certificate
imessage
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twitter
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instagram - ynnorris
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liked by landonorris, yourbestfriend, oscarpiastri and 973 others
just arrived to monaco and lan’s ditched me for max, give me recs x
*tap to load comments*
userone: i love that she thinks we’re rich enough to ever be in monaco
usertwo: the waterfront!
yourbestfriend: what happened to “we’ll go together”?
ynnorris: you chose your girlfriend over me 😁
yourbestfriend: she is quite literally graduating today
ynnorris: then don’t complain x
userthree: that’s a few too many suitcases no?
oscarpiastri: the vaundé bakery or the hiking trail
ynnorris: noted 🫡
userfour: something is going to happen between them two i’m calling it now
instagram dms
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ynnorris
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liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, yourbestfriend and 2734 others
i guess i understand why lando left gloomy london for this
*tap for more comments*
userone: where are the insta detectives, is that the bakery oscar recommended
usertwo: it is!
userthree: is that oscar?
oscarpiastri: no
userthree: oh no he’s experiencing his first heartbreak
landonorris: lol
userfour: foul
userfive: she’s living the dream
yourbestfriend: i miss u
ynnorris: come here, lando said i could invite anyone
landonorris: i did not.
ynnorris: do you want mum and dad to find out what happened to the clutch of their old fiesta?
landonorris: @/yourbestfriend what i meant to say is you’re more than welcome
usersix: she’s so effortlessly funny
imessage
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ynnorris
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liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, maxfewtrell and 7610 others
monaco over and out, see you soon 😉
*tap to load comments*
userone: is that oscar??
usertwo: god she is so pretty
userthree: i know oscar’s back when i see it
oscarpiastri: photo credits? 🙄
userfour: i knew it!
ynnorris: the photos are mediocre at best
oscarpiastri: take them down then, copyright 😤
ynnorris: big baby 😤
userfive: wait they’re so cute
maxfewtrell: oh yn
yourbestfriend: he’s going to kill you
landonorris: is that my balcony?
landonorris: answer the phone yn
ynnorris: no x
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ak319 · 20 days
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Lovesick bubbly hubby x reader
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(artist: ppanae100)
You sighed as another picture popped up on your phone, sent during his so-called "study session" with friends. You’d sent him to study, and this is what he was up to. Mentally, you made a note to confiscate his phone the next time he claimed to go to a "group-study."
So, Narin Gul was indeed your husband. This young, clingy, bratty, bimbo of a man—your husband. You, a college professor. No, not his college professor. You just happened to grow up in the same neighborhood, and the moment you helped him with an essay—something he was initially too shy to ask about but did on his parents' insistence—he fell hopelessly in love. Deeply. He wanted to be yours and you to be his only.
He still couldn’t quite understand how he’d fallen for a Chemistry professor, of all people, since he hated anything related to studying. His parents had to practically beg him to pursue a degree, just for his own good after he’d all but given up on academics. In the end, he chose English, thinking it might be easier—only to now cry over novels, not because of the stories, but because he absolutely despises studying! He just wanted to be whisked away. To stay at home all day and keep himself and the house pretty.
And you, you were everything he ever dreamt of. Like his own knight, a Princess Charming. Sure, you were a bit older, and that only made it all more romantic in his mind. He, a cute and eager English Literature student in his first year, and you, a sophisticated, cold, dashing, and incredibly intelligent Chemistry professor--just the thought of it made his heart flutter. After that first interaction, he practically melted onto the floor when he returned to his room, unable to believe that you were the same (Y/N) who used to play on the streets with your friends. He, a kid at the time, would watch from the sidelines, sometimes joining in, and then you had disappeared for years to get your degree. And now you were back--thank God, you were back--and more dreamy than ever.
From that day forward, he started paying more attention to his English studies. Well, at least trying. He’d read poetry or skim through the synopsis of novels he hadn’t actually touched, hoping to impress you with a few lines memorized just for you. His bimboy brain, of course, failed to process half of it, but that didn’t stop him. He had to prove that he was more than just a pretty face, that he was your good, studious boy—even if "studying" for him meant reciting two lines of poetry and hoping they stuck.
Narin knew, deep down, that you would never accept him as your anything because of the age gap. But despite his airheaded tendencies, he had a brain--one he didn’t use often, but when he did, he was clever. So, in a move that could only come from a desperate, lovesick boy, he concocted a scenario where his honour was on THE LINE!. And, of course, it was all because of you! His genius plan? Spread the rumour that you had asked him out on a date.
That single rumor was enough to send his parents into an absolute frenzy. Both families got involved, concerned about preserving reputations and traditions. Before you knew it, you were being dragged into marriage talks, and suddenly, you had a pretty boy in your lap with plump lips and an endless supply of cheeky grins. You couldn’t help but shake your head at the absurdity of it all. Tch.
🍭"Why do I have to study?!" Narin whined, flopping dramatically onto the couch like a toddler. "I want to be a househusband! I will be a househubby! I’m not going to college! Please, Coco!" His pleading eyes were wide and desperate as if hoping you’d magically let him off the hook.
You pinched the bridge of your nose, already feeling the day’s frustration mounting. It had only been one day since the wedding--a wedding where he cried hysterically about leaving his parents’ house, despite orchestrating the entire thing himself. And now, this?
"You have to go because your parents paid for it! A degree is important. After that, you can sit in the house. Got it?"
"No, it’s not! There-" He froze, gulping as your stern gaze bore into him. His rebellious stance deflated with a huff, like a child who’d been caught sneaking cookies. "Fine..." he grumbled, crossing his arms but relenting nonetheless.
Sigh.
You were so frustrated with the way your life had turned upside down that, instead of taking time off after the wedding, you threw yourself straight back into work just to stay sane. Meanwhile, you had Narin take a few days off to stop his constant whining about everything. You needed the quiet, but what shocked you was coming home every day to a home-cooked meal that was, annoyingly, delicious. Turns out, he’s actually talented at something after all. Not to mention those adorable outfits he wears, like that Panda onesie. What an adorable little minx.
However, he’s perpetually pouty, glaring at you like a scorned child every time you leave for work. He always tries his best to make you late, his antics a cheeky mix of playful defiance and desperate need for your attention which you cave in sometimes. He hadn't stopped grumbling about not being taken on a honeymoon either, arms crossed and lips jutting out in a sulk. But he will wait, deep down, he knew you’d take him eventually. He just wouldn’t let you live in peace until you did.
His friends were apparently waiting for honeymoon pictures—how embarrassing would it be to tell them his wife was too much of a workaholic to go on one? So, of course, he told them you were saving up for something huge. Eventually, to quiet him and his friends, you took him on that honeymoon just to get it over with.
Narin always made sure to do his homework right beside you, his head often resting on the table, watching as you graded papers with that calm, focused look on your face. Did he forget to mention you looked so hot?! It was like he was in his OWN K-drama! He loved being in your presence--it was warm, comforting, and-
🍭"Narin? Narin! Stop dozing off. I want to see you writing."
He jolted upright. "Y-yes! Wait—why are you being so strict? I was just... taking a break." And there they were, those tears welling up in his eyes again. His go-to move. No, as a matter of fact he savoured your strictness. So, so much , like 'choke me already, ma'am'.
Sigh # 2
Despite his exaggerated bouts of emotion, Narin never forgot to remind everyone at college that he was a newlywed--with you as his wife, an established and respected professor. Oh, he made sure the world knew. That’s right. Go rot in jealousy, losers.
🍭"Your husband has, again...behaved very rudely in the class." Your friend, Payton who was a professor at his college called you from work. '"I mean, before that teacher went to the dean, I handled the situation.'
You glanced over at Narin, standing nearby with his arms folded, clearly shivering under your gaze. What the hell are you supposed to do with him?. You made him apologize to said teacher and now he was ranting on the way to the car.
"Not my fault! She wasn't letting me go to my hair appointment! And why weren't you picking up my phone?! Did you already find someone else?! More beautiful than ME?! ARE THEY YOUR STUDENT?!"
"You little-" You held back, controlling the urge to snap. Control, (Y/N), control. ''Get in the fucking car." You slammed the passenger door as he got in and once in, turned to him.
"You were expecting me to come and take you to a salon in the middle of my job?! And why the hell do you have an appointment in the middle of your classes in the first place?!" You knew perfectly well he made the appointment as an excuse to bunk.
"Well, forgive me, wife, for trying to look pretty for you," he muttered, looking away dramatically. Then, with a smirk, he added, "And by the way... have you got your friend spying on me here?" His cheeks flushed pink, and he giggled like a child. Possessive control freak, he thought to himself. God, that’s so blazing hot of you. Just when are you gonna collar me? That too a pretty diamond one? :(
Why is he smiling like that?
"Look, Narin, she is just doing her job—"
"Oh my God, staaahp," he interrupted with another giggle. "Just drive~. You don’t need to be so defensive about it. I know you love me so much." He pecked your cheek, likely leaving a glossy stain behind, then laughed, clearly enjoying his latest episode of theatrics.
Great, you thought. He’s at it again.
Sigh #3
Well, after that, you had to keep a close watch on him to ensure he didn’t book any more 'self-care for wifey' appointments during college days. You still wondered why he squealed and shied away whenever you demanded to check his phone. What bothered you the most was that, despite having a sharp tongue, he seemed quite naive and innocent when it came to understanding the consequences of his words and actions. This often led to clashes with his in-laws. Had his parents even bothered to teach him anything?
🍭"Good, you're ready. Let's go." You got up from the sofa as he finally emerged from the bathroom, dolled up. You were really hungry and just wanted to get to the family dinner.
"And here I was expecting you to shower me with romantic compliments... write a damn poem or something so we’d get delayed, and then YOUR family would ask why we're late so I could tell it to their faces that THEIR (Y/n) couldn't stop showering me with compliments and affection, making THEM jealous. THAT’S HOW IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!"
"Um... you look pretty. Pretty as ever. And we’re late either way, so you still get to use that line. Come on now." You walked past him, not forgetting to--
"Hey! NO! You don’t get the 'smack my bum pass' after that lackluster compliment you threw at my face, professor." Liar, he definitely loved it.
He’s a little manipulator with the eyes that of a siren. He knows how to use #keepingyourpartnerunderyourspell tactics very well. If you get furious or don’t take his side after he acts like the spitfire he is in front of your family, then goodbye. He’s leaving with his suitcase, which is mostly empty because he knows you’ll come to bring him back home anyway, to go to his parents’. After enjoying at least half a day of tranquility , you have to bring him back before his parents call you and inform you about his hunger strike.
However, when you visit your in-laws, you’re treated like a queen, being their only daughter-in-law. Narin, although a headache sometimes, really takes care of your comfort, always standing over your head and feeding you various dishes. You just wish he would be this docile in front of your family. Perhaps one day. Your parents scold you for being so lenient with him, but what are you supposed to do? On one side, your husband won’t let you be in peace, and on the other, your family. You just use the excuse of him being young and immature every time. It hurts seeing him sad without you even realizing it.
Narin feels deeply wounded by the way your family sometimes favors you and disapproves of him, especially after how he has schemed his way into your life. Despite this, he believes their disapproval is unjust and is tormented by the idea that they want you to LEAVE HIM! Leave such a beautiful, ideal boy like him!. The fear of this happening haunts him, makes him furious, even giving him nightmares. He can't bear that. He will wilt. He won't ever let that happen!
He believes in love, just like in the fairy tales and Shakespeare’s sappy lines and knows that one day your heart will melt. He can spot the tenderness in your eyes and the way you care for him, correcting his dumb choices like saving him from sending the shared account details to an unknown number for a free couple spa day at a resort in Greece🥹🎀
🍭"Hey, Coco? Did you tell everyone that I passed my driving test?" Narin asked with a mischievous glint in his eye. It was Sunday, and he’d invited your family over for tea, or maybe he was just feeling playful and bored. He loved stirring things up a bit.
"Yes, on his first try too," you said, looking up from your laptop with a proud smile.
Narin’s cheeks turned a shade of pink at your beaming expression. "Why wouldn't I pass? You were my teacher, after all, haha. God," he turned to your mum, "Your daughter is such a scary teacher, but it was worth it. Haha!"
He got up to refill your tea and serve more snacks, catching the eye roll from your mum as he did.
HE. IS. LOVING. THIS. MARRIED. LIFE. >_<
(AN: wanna get Narin preggo- also a warm welcome to my new subs✨️)
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ariestrxsh · 1 month
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⚠️ content warning: ⚠️ smut, corruption of innocence, mentions of porn, masturbation, manipulative!matt, manipulative!chris, innocent!reader
✍️ Summary: ✍️ Matt and Chris have always had a fantasy of sharing a virgin in a threesome, and once they learn how pure and untouched you are, you become the objective of their conquest.
this fic was inspired/requested by this ask, this ask, and of course, this ask. 💖 hope you guys enjoy.
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You eagerly strode into your last class of the day, seventh period Chemistry, where you took your seat behind Matt Sturniolo. You gave him a playful smile, stoked to talk to your new friend. You didn't have many friends because you were a bit shy and introverted. Despite having just turned 18, you hadn't had many shared experiences with your peers. You had grown up sheltered and still had a naivety about the world. But Matt? He loved your innocence. He was almost intrigued by it. He'd poke fun at you every now and again, but he was sweet about it.
It was a rainy Thursday afternoon, and the teacher was showing a movie while she tried not to fall asleep at her desk in the dimly lit classroom. Matt was turned all the way around in his seat, giving you all his attention. His pretty blue eyes caught yours as you glanced up from your homework you were doing for another class.
"So, you've never seen porn?" Matt inquired, still shocked from having learned this piece of information about you the day before. "I mean, I've seen steamy scenes in movies. Isn't that like, the same thing?" You wondered, tilting your head at Matt. "No, not quite," he giggled at you. "Well, how is it different?" You asked, whispering so no one would hear your conversation. "You get to see everything," Matt responded, raising an eyebrow and biting his lip. "What do you mean?" You questioned him.
"Do you know what sex is?" He asked, wide-eyed. Your face grew red, afraid to answer, because it had led to relentless teasing in the past. "It's okay, darling. You don't have to be embarrassed. I'm just wondering," he assured you, looking at you with a soft, sympathetic expression. You shook your head.
"I have a vague idea, but no, not really," you admitted quietly. "Well, what's your understanding of it, princess?" Matt curiously replied, studying your features intently. "I know it's something people do when they fall in love and wanna have a baby," you started to say, looking to Matt to help you out, but you stopped when he let out a soft chuckle.
"I mean, you're not wrong. People do have sex when they're in love and are trying to have a baby, but that's not the only reason people do it," Matt told you, biting his lip. "Why else do people do it?" You wondered, cocking your head. "Lots of reasons. It could just be because they think the other person is hot. Or they could want to get back at somebody. Or they could just be really horny and want to feel good," Matt murmured, failing to hold back a smirk.
"Horny?" You repeated. You'd never heard that word before. "Yeah, it's when you start feeling that urge to get off, you know?" He looked at you, examining your expression. You looked back at him blankly as if he were speaking another language.
"You ever masturbated, sweetheart?" Matt questioned, flicking his eyes back and forth between your lips and your eyes, eagerly awaiting your answer. "I don't think so. What's that mean?" You wondered, smiling at him. You didn't know what it all meant, but it felt like a conversation you shouldn't have been having with a boy you'd just met. "So innocent," Matt whispered to himself under his breath, fascinated by how sheltered you were from the subject of sex.
"Well, horny is a feeling you get that you can usually make go away by masturbating. You know how when you're hungry, you feel how empty your stomach is, and it starts rumbling because it wants to be filled? It's kind of like that, but you feel it a little lower than your stomach. For guys, we get hard and for girls, you usually get wet between your legs," Matt smirked at you, wondering how you were going to react.
"I think I've felt that before. In fact, I think I feel it right now," you told him. He raised his eyebrows and opened his mouth a bit. "Yeah, princess? Why do you feel that way, hmm?" He cooed. "I don't know. I feel that way when I'm around you sometimes," you told him, clenching your thighs together, becoming hyper aware of the feeling Matt described and also becoming a bit self-conscious like you shouldn't have admitted to such a thing out loud. "Wow. Well, isn't that something?" He responded, nibbling on his bottom lip.
"So, what is that other word you used? Mastur-something?" You wondered. "Masturbation. It's when you touch your private parts until it feels really good, like an explosion. There's lot of ways to do it. You can use your hands. You can use toys. You can even just grind on a pillow or something," he sneered.
"I think I've done that," you smiled, growing a little embarrassed by the conversation, recalling a memory in which you had a pillow between your legs and you'd moved in a certain way, sending waves of pleasure through your system. "What part, princess?" He asked, a malicious smile spreading across his lips. "I think I've grinded against a pillow before, but I didn't feel any explosions," you responded, burying your face as you felt Matt's eyes burning into you. "Oh, really. Not so innocent after all," he chuckled, giving you a look that made you nervous.
"Hey, Matt. Will you show me porn? You know, just so I know how it's different from the movies," you asked, avoiding eye contact. "Of course I can. That's what friends are for. Let's go to my car together after class," Matt smirked at you, and you nodded.
About twenty minutes later, the bell rang and Matt offered to carry your your backpack while the two of you stepped out of the classroom together. You guys made your way across the parking lot, and Matt took off his sweater and held it over your head to keep you dry from the drizzling rain. He even opened the passenger side door of his car for you. "Get in, princess," he smiled at you. He put your belongings in the back and came to sit beside you.
"I'm gonna show you one of my favorite videos," Matt whispered, pulling out his phone and typing something into it. You listened to the sounds of the water droplets beating down heavier now on the roof of Matt's car while you took in the aroma of rain and the citrus-scented car freshner that hung from the rearview mirror.
When he tilted the phone towards you and placed it into your hands, there was a woman in a school girl outfit and pigtails and a man who you assumed was supposed to be her teacher, and the man was asking her what she was willing to do for extra credit.
After a few minutes of them going back and forth with their cheesy acting, the man started to unbutton the girl's blouse and play with her breasts, taking each of them into his mouth and suckling gently on them. He started pushing her up against the desk until she was practically laying on it.
Then he got down on his knees and put his head between the girl's legs, pushing up her skirt, moving her panties to the side, and licking her most sacred place while she started quietly whimpering. It panned to a closeup shot, and you watched the way the man flicked his tongue, swirling it around and gently sucking on her clit, and you found your stomach tying itself in knots as you listened to the sounds of her moaning and the man lapping up her wet pussy.
"Wow," you whispered, your eyes widening as you fixated on the video. "You like that, princess? Does it make you all wet?" He asked, tipping your chin up with his finger, pulling your gaze away from his phone to make eye contact with you. You bit your lip and slowly nodded, and then turned back to the screen.
The schoolgirl was running her fingers through her teacher's hair while he looked up at her, and she began moaning loudly and trembling. "What's happening?" You asked Matt. "She's about to finish all over his tongue," Matt whispered in a sultry voice, studying the way you were watching his phone more than he was the video. You didn't know exactly what that meant, but it looked like it felt amazing. All you could think about was how you wanted Matt to do that to you, but you were too embarrassed to tell him.
After the girl was done shaking, the teacher in the video started gently cleaning her up with his tongue, and the screen transitioned to the man taking off his pants. You'd never seen a man's private parts before, and the sight of it intimidated you. Your jaw dropped as he took his big, hard member and started putting it where his tongue was before. You watched in awe as he disappeared into the hole between her legs. You didn't even know it was possible to fit anything that big in there. The man started bucking his hips quickly as the pigtailed girl cried out.
"Is he hurting her?" You asked with concern in your voice, wondering why she was making those sounds. "No, sweetheart," Matt chuckled at your innocence. "She's making all that noise because she likes it," he bit his lip, staring into your wide, doe eyes. "She likes it?" You repeated back uncertaintly. "Yeah. Sometimes there's a fine line between pain and pleasure. But I promise, she sounds like that because it feels really good," Matt nodded at you and pushed a strand of hair away from your face.
You continued taking in the sight as the girl got pounded by her teacher, and Matt continued watching you, but out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Matt gently rubbing the tip of his cock over his pants with his thumb. "What are you doing?" You smiled at him, eyeing the growing tent in his pants. "Oh, nothing. Don't worry about it," he whispered, carrying on. "Why won't you tell me?" You asked, looking up from the screen at Matt with a slightly frustrated expression.
Usually, he would explain everything you didn't understand, and you wondered why this was different. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. This video just does things to me," Matt said, stroking his member through the jean fabric and letting out a few soft moans while he looked back and forth between the screen and the curious look on your face. "Are you doing masturbation right now?" You squinted at him with a smirk on your face, using the term you'd just learned like a kid who'd just learned the meaning of a swear word. He chuckled at you and said, "maybe."
Finally the teacher started fucking his student with incredible vigor, and their sounds and movements reached a crescendo. You intently studied the way the student started trembling and the teacher's cock started twitching while he filled her up.
"What did you think, darling?" Matt cooed, running his knuckles along your cheek while your eyes traveled up to meet his. "That made me so horny," you whispered to him. He raised an eyebrow at you, excited to hear that sentence leave you mouth. "Matt, where did you find this video and where can I find more?" You wondered, your eyes glimmering as if you'd just stumbled upon gold. "I'll send you a few more of my favorite videos," Matt responded, eager to corrupt you. "Come on, I'll take you home," Matt responded, looking amused, starting up his engine, and turning on his windshield wipers to clear the rain.
You gave him directions, and he parked by the curb in front of your house. "This is your house?" He questioned, wide-eyed and slack-jawed. You nodded. "What do your parents do for work?" He wondered. "Mom's a surgeon. Dad's an engineer," you half-smiled at Matt. You were used to that question and that reaction. "Matt, please don't forget to send me those videos," you desperately reminded him. "I won't. Promise. And you have my number, so you can always text me to remind me," Matt replied. "Let me walk you to your door."
The two of you meandered up the driveway, and Matt carried your books and your bag. You both stood underneath the stoop of the front door to avoid getting rained on, both searching around the atmosphere with your darting eyes for a reason to invite him inside.
"So, are your parents home?" Matt wondered, peering into your empty driveway. "No, mom works nights, and my dad won't be home for another few hours," you smiled at him, biting your lip. "Do you want me to show you how to get off to those videos?" Matt inquired, taking a step closer to you. "That would be amazing," you nodded, opening your door and letting him in.
"Wow, this is a nice place," Matt declared, walking through the living room, the hallway, and the kitchen, admiring the high ceilings and the decor. "Your parents rich or something?," he asked. "We're well-off," you replied, avoiding directly answering the question as if you'd been trained to do so. "Let's go to your room, princess. I'll show you there," he smirked, and you led him up your spiral staircase and into your room.
Your room was rather large, had a walk-in closet, and an attached bathroom that was just as extravagant. You had a big dresser with a hand-painted design on it next to your king-sized bed, and you had a vanity with an oval shaped mirror on the opposite wall. Your room was neat and tidy.
"A place for everything and everything in its place," was what your mom always told you growing up, and it was a motto you still lived by.
"What do I do first?" You asked him. He sat on your bed and patted the comforter beside him, "come here, and let's get you out of those shorts." "Take off my shorts?" You asked. Matt nodded, biting his lip and looking you up and down. You listened to him, pulling them down to your ankles and stepping out of your denim bottoms. "Take your panties off too," he flicked his eyes up towards yours, and you immediately blushed.
"I was told nobody should see down there unless it's for medical reasons," you shook your head. "You can trust me, sweetheart. It can be our little secret. I just wanna help you feel good," he cooed. You gave him an unconvinced expression. "I won't touch you. You'll just touch yourself. But I do have to look to see if you're doing it properly," he told you. "O-okay," you stammered, slowly taking off your grey, lace-trimmed panties.
Matt stared between your legs, admiring the tufts of hair placed perfectly on your mound. "Come here, princess. Sit on the bed beside me. Spread open your legs," he directed you as you obeyed him, despite your hesitancy. "Wow, it's so beautiful," he gasped, which made your blood rush to your cheeks even more. You never imagined someone would see it and call it beautiful.
"The first thing you should do is get your fingers wet, so it's easier to play with. Can I?" Matt motioned toward your hand. You turned your palm towards him, he snatched your wrist and slowly licked the pads of you ring, middle, and pointer finger. You noted how nice his tongue felt against your fingertips. "Now start touching it princess," he whispered.
You instinctively pressed down on your sweet spot, and started moving your fingers in a circular motion, which immediately resulted in a sweet sound pouring from your lips. Matt watched as your hand wandered between your thighs, examining your folds and savoring the sight of your drooling hole while you pioneered your pussy for the first time. "How's it feel?" Matt inquired, biting his lip and staring at you with a hungry expression. "Incredible," you sighed, drawing tighter circles on your clit. "Need me to help you get your fingers wet again?" Matt asked, his eyes stuck in between your thighs, and you innocently nodded. You reached out to Matt again, and he gently sucked on your fingers, moaning against them. "You taste so good," he whispered. You giggled and starting playing with yourself again.
"You're doing such a good job. It looks like you're a natural," he stated, starstruck by you. "Really?" You beamed at his praise. "Yes, sweetheart. You should try to put your fingers inside," he suggested. "Right here?" You asked, resting your middle finger at your entrance. Matt nodded and he watched as you dipped your finger into your center, rolling your eyes back and letting out a louder moan. "Good girl," Matt encouraged you, which turned you on even more. You intuitively knew to move your finger in and out and you began to go at a faster pace.
"It's such a tight fit!" You gasped. Matt's cock twitched at your innocent observation. He grew excited over how badly you were teasing him without knowing it. You slowly inserted another finger and Matt watched as the pleasure overtook your expression and your movements. "You've never done this before? You look like you know what you're doing," Matt whispered, studying every curve of your body. "No, I haven't. I'm just doing what feels right," you replied, closing your eyes forgetting that Matt was there while you started to lose yourself in the throes of ecstasy. Your body began to tremble, and you were moaning Matt's name over and over again.
You felt like you were on the edge of something about to jump but got scared at the last minute. Becoming self-conscious and remembering you had an audience, you shot open your eyes as you nervously giggled and said, "I think something was about to happen, but then the feeling stopped." "Am I making you nervous, princess?" Matt considered. "A little bit," you whispered covering your pussy with your hand and looking innocently up at him. "Then I'm gonna go. You're in good hands," Matt smirked, knowing there was a double meaning in his words you probably wouldn't pick up on.
It was hard for Matt to resist diving between your legs and having his way with you, but he didn't want to overwhelm you. Plus, he had made a promise to someone, that if he'd ever come across a virgin who was naive enough to give her virginity to him, he was going to share her.
You got up and slipped back into your panties and shorts, and you and Matt stood in the doorway of your room, both searching for any reason to touch each other. "I had fun today, Matt. I'll text you tonight. Thank you so much for your help," you threw your arms around his shoulders and embraced him. "Of course, sweet girl. I can't wait to hear which of my favorite videos you like touching yourself to the most. I'll see you tomorrow in class," he whispered into your ear, hugging you back and feeling your curves as he moved his hands down your waist. He reveled in the way your perky breasts pressed up against his chest and the way your hair smelled of eucalyptus and rose while he held you.
You each said your final goodbyes, Matt descended the staircase and made his way out the front door. Then he walked down your driveway to his car and sped off.
Once Matt got home, he found Chris in the kitchen making a grilled cheese sandwich. "Hey, Chris. You know how we have that little fantasy where we corrupt a virgin and do her at the same time?" Matt nonchalantly asked his brother. "Yeah? Go on," Chris looked intrigued, raising a brow at Matt's words. "I think I found the perfect girl," Matt said grabbing a can of root beer out of the fridge door.
"Who?" A maniacal grin spread across Chris' lips. "You don't know her, but she sits behind me in Chemistry," Matt responded, picturing you in his head, your innocent doe eyes, your cute hairpin smile, and your pink, pouty lips. "She's about as pure as it gets. She didn't even know what porn was before I showed her today," Matt flicked his dark gaze up at Chris and sneered.
"What did you show her?" Chris' eyes lit up. "Just something really tame," Matt smirked. "I wish I could have seen her face," Chris stated. "She loved it so much that she asked if I could send her more videos tonight," Matt said, biting his lip.
"What are you gonna send her?" Chris wondered. "I haven't decided yet, but let me handle this one. I don't want you scaring her off with the violent shit you watch," Matt scoffed. "What? It's tasteful," Chris smiled back at Matt. "No, it is. I just think it would be a lot for how inexperienced she is. Ease her into it," Matt stated, gesturing at Chris to pump the brakes.
"You better share her with me. If I find out you deflowered her without me, I'll kill you," Chris devilishly grinned. "I wouldn't dream of it," Matt said, knowing damn well he had his chance when he sat on your bed that afternoon and observed the most intimate moment you'd ever had with yourself.
"Will you send me more videos, Matt? I really wanna watch another," your text read when he opened it later that night. "Yeah? Don't worry, pretty girl. I got you," he replied. Matt sent you a few different links, and you watched them all, equally entertained by each one.
You did end up getting off that night, tangled in your sheets in the dark while you intently watched the screen under your blanket, to a video of a girl, who looked a bit like you, who was losing her virginity to a man who coincidentally resembled Matt. The actor had dark hair, blue eyes, a tattooed arm, and he was being so soft and sweet in the video, going slow and taking his time with every movement and thrust. You came all over your fingers while you stifled your moans as best as you could to keep from waking your dad who had just gotten home and was sound asleep in the room next to yours. Every muscle in your body constricted and then released as you crossed the finish line for the first time.
You laid in your bed, panting and dumbfounded by how something that was so accessible felt so amazing. "Thank you so much for showing me porn and masturbation. :)" you sent to Matt before you curled up with your knees against your chest and drifted off into a dreamland, feeling like a whole new person.
part two posted here 💖
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