#I understand now why my friend was so sad rip

[summerthatartist]

Damn, has it really been 3 years? Time doesn't feel real....

Here's some art to heal the pain a bit.

I think this is the first time I've ever really mentioned the fact that I had watched Unus Annus before it got deleted. Now, some of you who don't know me will probably be confused, which is understandable, and this part isn't really for you, unless you're curious. I won't stop you if you want to read the rest.

~

When Unus Annus existed, the only reason why I had watched it in the first place was because my best friend had mentioned it. At the time, I didn't care for it. I was too deep in my Aphmau and Harry Potter fixations to give a shit about it. When it got deleted, I felt nothing. I didn't tell anyone I had watched it, including my best friend, who had texted me and cried about it when it ended.

Recently, I've realized how important it was that I had that opportunity. However, I'm still upset that I joined in so late. If I hadn't found Harry Potter and Aphmau at the same time Unus Annus came out, I would've been there the entire time. Time had run out for me by the time I had gotten about halfway through the videos.

3 years later, Unus Annus still has a special place in my heart, and I hold the channel's message as a reminder to keep going, and to make every day count.

Remember to live every day like an Unus Annus video, because life is not forever.

Memento Mori ⏳

~🌙🕯️

[morose-melodies]

when you hit capitano, he let you.

you were angry, you were frustrated and he understood that very well.

your family was gone, your friends were gone and all of this carnage was caused by his sword.

when you hit him again, trying to shove him, he removed his helmet for you - hit him wherever you pleased, and he'd allow it.

he didn't feel sorry for your family, nor did he feel sorry for your friends - he didn't even feel sorry for taking you from your home. it was something he deemed a necessary evil.

you weren't happy where you were; maybe now that everyone you once knew was gone, you were trying to convince yourself that you cared for them, that you were closer to them than you truly were.

you scratched at him, leaving a long stinging mark on his cheek. his eyes had hearts in them as he looked down at you - you were perfect, you deserved nothing less than the best.

you grabbed a pillow from his bed and started beating him with it.

"you're so- ugh, you make me sick!"

you were getting frustrated with him. the captain felt for you, he just wanted you to be happy, "hit me harder if you must, stab me if it pleases you, rip out my hair, spit in my face for all I care."

"sh-shut up... what's wrong with you...?"

you sighed, your arms were sore and you were tired - you'd been crying and yelling at him for hours it seemed.

the captain raised a hand and reached for your face, wiping away a stray tear rolling down your cheek, "I love you... too much-"

you smacked his hand away, glaring at him.

he lowered his hand. "(y/n), I'd like for you to understand why-"

"stop talking! you're making everything worse. just shut up!" you cried over, covering your eyes and cried into your hands.

he wanted to hug you, comfort you, and ease the sadness you felt but he was well aware that that would make things worse.

so, he watched instead.

it was as if he was admiring you even in your weakest moment - he couldn't see you in a negative light, ever. he loved you, that last thing he wanted was for you to think otherwise.

but it seemed you already did.

he'd have to make it up to you, he reasoned.

[icarusredwings]

Thinking about Wade's life and his mental health issues a lot, and I just thought about this. Not only being abused, but his entire brain being made out of cancer, and the fact that oxygen was physically taken from his brain over the course of 2+ days multiple times?

We see him coloring a lot and claim multiple times that he doesn't/ can't read (this is probably a bit, I guarantee he can read), but it had me thinking what if some days were more childish then others as part of his coping mechanisms?

At first, Logans was really confused about why Althea puts up with it until he realizes that it's extremely good for him to just... be taken care of? Praised and given affection for the bare minimum? He thinks it's weird. This wasn't the same man he was fighting with yesterday.

Coming into the living room, he sees Wade sprawled out with crayons and markers all around him with multiple pictures already coloured, his notebook having pages ripped out of it as he kicks his feet and hums.

On the tv, there are cartoons playing. Once in a while, he'll look up at the tv and then go back to coloring. "What are you doing??"

"Hi wolvie. 'm colouring."

"He's behaving, so don't ruin it." Al says. There's pictures by her, and she is holding a box of cereal.

"O..kay??" Sitting down, he's almost too curious to just walk away, picking up puppins so she doesn't ruin his drawings, petting her confusedly.

Sometimes, Al will hold out some cereal in her hand. "Wade." And he will see him shimmy over and take the cereal. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, baby."

As hes scooting back to his color spot he stops and watches the tv for a bit longer then usual.

"...What.. the fuck." Logan says to her and she gives him a brow raise. "What?"

"What is he doing?"

"He's coloring. And I thought I was the blind one."

"No no I mean.. those aren't murder plans. That's puppins."

"Yes? And?"

"And.. what did you do to him?"

"Treated him like a human being. Give it a try once inawhile." She says, and he comes back with more pictures, climbing in between them with no regard for space as he leans into her.

"Oh thank you. What is it?"

"It's you."

"Oh? How sweet. Do I look good?"

"Mhm!"

"Im glad. How about you show our friend here your amazing pictures. And he better be nice!"

So wade turns and now is leaning on logan as he points to a different picture. One of Logan with Puppins on a leash with a sun in the corner and crappy grass, a hearts all over the place.

At first he wants to tell him to get off of him, but seeing the pictures and how excited his eyes were to show him, it hits him and he understands.

".. uhm.. thank you?" But he puts it back in his hand. "Oh- you want me to keep it?"

Wade nods and starts cleaning up his crayons.

Logan turns to whisper to Al "How long does this go on?"

"About 2 hours or so."

"Why?"

"God only knows, but it helps with his nightmares."

"Colouring helps with his nightmares??"

"Its more then that. Hey sweetheart? Why don't you bring your ponys out."

"Theyre horses."

"Oh im sorry, my mistake. I think logan here wants to play horses."

Logan gives her a look like excuse me? When did I sign up for that? "No.. uhm.. I think im good."

Wade gets this look of sad innocence but goes to get them anyway, beginning to play by himself, brushing them and making them talk to each other quietly. As if he speaks any louder, he would get hit.

Logan groans and is like "Gimme a fucking horse.."

From then on, Logan is quick to understand what's happening and is much nicer to him, starts giving him snacks, buying him actual coloring books, and has pinned his drawings to the fridge each time he's gifted one. His horses name is Buttercup, by the way.

[spicyhamsamson]

I am. So fucking tired of Batman being portrayed as a bad parent and a toxic person. And it’s so goddamn widespread. Fuck, it might be as bad as the whole “Superman being a kindhearted Boy Scout is boring” take.

I get it, the man’s not exactly stable, he watched his parents get murdered in front of him and spent years of his life training to fight crime dressed like a giant scary bat, of course he’s not perfect.

But to say that Bruce Wayne isn’t caring, isn’t empathetic, to call him abusive…it just misses the point of who the character is to me.

Why do you think he fights crime? Yes, part of it is because he’s bitter and sad because his parents were cruelly ripped from him as a child, and he’s lashing out against the corruption of his city. It’s arguably the focus of his earlier years. But he learns to become more than that. He learns to bring hope, a chance to be better.

Harleen Quinzel is the Joker’s right hand lady, but she’s also a victim of an abusive relationship and a woman with a surprisingly strong moral compass and a love for animals, and wants to get better. That’s why we see time and time again that he has a noticeable soft spot for her, because he knows that she’s a good person at her core.

Harvey Dent is a man who will decide someone’s fate on a coin toss(and a pretty inaccurate depiction of DID), but he’s also Bruce’s close friend who clearly needs help learning to live with his condition, rather than try to get rid of it, and someone who he still goes out of his way to visit, even after everything, because he recognizes he’s not just a criminal with a weird gimmick, he’s a man who is struggling with a condition that he’s mishandled his whole life.

Victor Fries is a cold, emotionless man who will callously discard allies and blame them for being careless, but he’s also a man who’s either lashing out because he had the love of his life taken from him, or just desperate to make sure she isn’t taken from him, and is willing to do anything just to guarantee her survival. Of course Batman would understand, his whole life was defined by having people he loved taken away from him.

Even the Joker, arguably one of the most morally bankrupt characters in all of fiction, is someone that Batman has offered a chance to. After the guy shoots the daughter of his friend, a girl he cared for like she was his own kid, and paralyzes her from the waist down, he tells the Joker that he doesn’t want to hurt him. He wants to get him help. He looks at this monster who has taken countless lives and says “You don’t have to be alone.”

For fuck’s sake, he sat with Joe Chill in his last moments so that he wouldn’t be alone. Joe Chill, the man who murdered his parents, who took so much from him, the person responsible for all of the misery and suffering he’s gone through. And he sits with the man to comfort him while dies. Do you know how much emotional intelligence and maturity that must take? To comfort someone who arguably ruined your life?

And you’re gonna tell me the man who did that would abuse his kids?

That he’d hold up the young man whose death was his greatest failure, the boy he grieved, and say this?

That he’d look his goddamn son in the eyes and say this to him?

Why the FUCK do you think he took in Dick Grayson in the first place? It wasn’t because he saw the kid and thought “Ah. A potential soldier.”, it was because he saw a boy experiencing the same heartbreaking loss he had so many years ago, and wanted to make sure he didn’t end up as bitter and miserable as he was.

Why do you think he smiled when Tim Drake presented him a broken watch for Father’s Day? Because he was just happy to see the boy alive and safe.

DAMIAN LITERALLY POINTED AT A COW AND SAID “I’m keeping her. She’s Bat-Cow.” AND BRUCE JUST WENT WITH IT. DIDN’T EVEN NEED TO ARGUE WHY BRUCE SHOULD LET HIM KEEP HER. HE SAID “this cow is my pet now” AND BRUCE SAID “aight, bet”.

The thing about Batman is that he wants to make sure nobody else ends up feeling the way he does. That’s not just about stopping a mugger so a boy’s parents aren’t gunned down. It’s about giving his loved ones the support and care that he couldn’t have, because it was taken from him. It’s about comforting someone who just went through a traumatic experience and letting them know that they’re going to be okay. It’s about going to someone locked away in a cell who thinks that they’re a lost cause and a burden to society and telling them that he wants to help them get better. It’s about EMPATHY and COMPASSION.

That’s what makes him a HERO. He’s meant to inspire us, to show us that we can have that same empathy for others around us, that we can turn our suffering into hope for a better future.

I just wish more people at DC would start recognizing that. But I might as well follow that example myself. Maybe through this struggle of having to see this hero mistreat the people around him and act like a grade-A jackass, people will start to recognize that missing compassion, and slowly but surely, it might come back. After all, what is this post, if not trying to bring attention to the matter in the hopes of fixing it?

[doomedcousins]

ivypools heart excerpt thoughts

this book feels like it was made in a lab to piss me off. genuinely every little thing in this excerpt besides that one little moment with shadowsight and dovewing makes me want to rip my hair out

ivypool would not fucking act like that.

the constant hammering in of how Sad Ivypool is about her Daughter feels so flat because they literally did not do anything to flesh out their relationship when bristlefrost was alive. also because i dont like ivypool

rootspring is going to hell for making bristlefrosts sacrifice about how she could have been a mother i dont care how much the books tried to sell their relationship to me this is straight up the worst and if i see anyone talking about how sad his life is ill kill myself

i don't even think they remember anything about shadowsight its impressive how little they gaf about it in a book about its cousin, who, as i have said before, literally died to save its life

^ though honestly i think they literally forgot that bristlefrost and shadowsight are kin. like they go on about ivypool and her sister and their respective dead kids and then coincidentally shadowsight is literally never brought up despite its significance in the topic

ivypool would not fucking act like that

i dont like that dovewing and ivypool are suddenly good friends now i dont like it. ivypool should be miserable and alone forever as she continues to let clan culture destroy her in an attempt to be "more loyal" she should hold onto her grudges until it kills her

fernsong is such a nothing character i honestly dont understand why they keep trying to tell me that bristlefrosts parents were actually good at parenting. look me in the eyes and tell me bristlefrosts parents were present in her life outside of when she was a baby

wrenflight im sorry they're setting you up to be yet another woman who's entire character centers around romance im so sorry

[knavesflames]

halloooooo !! I’m not sure if requests are open but if they’re not it’s okay if you don’t write this. I wanted to ask if you could write an Arlecchino x reader (fluff, can be fic or headcanons or anythint) where reader is insecure about her face ? Like they don’t think they’re pretty enough bc of their friends and stuff. Thank you !! Take your time and have a nice day <3

I needed something like this rn so I’m almost glad it took so long for me to get to (though I am sorry, i have been so busy) a lil hard to be positive right now but i tried my best!!

Word count: 707

Contents: fluff, insecure reader

UTC!

Your friends are beautiful, handsome. They truly are. Your girlfriend, Arlecchino, is stunning too. It seems everyone around you has the perfect face, looks utterly amazing. You find yourself admiring them whenever you’re around them. Yet, you, yourself, are not any of those things. Not in your own mind. You can’t even look at yourself in the mirror, at least, not recently. You find your eyes burning with hot tears the second you catch a glimpse, and you find yourself growing bitter at the sight of anyone who doesn’t look like you. At least before it got so bad you could joke about how you wanted to be them, and now jealousy has given way to hatred, even if they’ve done nothing wrong.

It isn’t like Arlecchino hasn’t noticed, either. The way your makeup mirror has been flipped around so you don’t have to see yourself, or the way you purposely avoid looking towards any reflective surface, even during intimate activities. And if we’re honest, Arlecchino loves to make you look at yourself while you’re coming undone because of her, except her recent advances have been met with a firm ‘no’.

She can’t figure out why you suddenly began acting like this. Any mention of either your frame or your face turns you angry and silent, with your fists clenching. You aren’t angry really though, you’re just sad. Sad you won’t ever look like the people you wish you could look like. Devastated at the thought that Arlecchino will one day see sense and leave you for one of them. The thought of that hurts you so much you begin distancing yourself from her, too. Arlecchino, at first, is confused. She, for the life of her, cannot understand any of this. Yet, the day comes where you can’t even bring yourself to look at her while she speaks to you, and she can’t seem to keep herself quiet anymore.

“Look at me,” she snaps. She tries not to lose her temper with you, not when she knows there’s a clear reason why you’re acting the way you’re acting, but you’re not saying anything, you won’t even look at her.

You feel your own jaw setting, all of your negative feelings bubbling up for no reason. Unfortunately this time, she seems to be the target. “Or what, you’ll leave me for someone prettier?”

Arlecchino doesn’t flinch, but her expression, the one that’s usually so graceful and emotionless, crumples into a frown of pure disbelief and confusion. Her voice this time comes out as a quiet hiss. “What? You doubt my affection for you after all this time? Is that what this is about?”

When you go to argue back, and your voice breaks into a cry, she softens as much as someone like Arlecchino can soften. “I see,” she murmurs, sitting down next to you. Her hand softly lands on your knee, squeezing it gently. “This again, is it? I have told you countless times—“

“It doesn’t help. I still feel this way.” Your attempt at a venomous response does nothing but highlight how you’re feeling, the exact opposite effect you wanted. Still, you sniffle, your hands curled in on themselves as you talk. “No words will help that I want to rip off my own skin because it feels like I am the ugliest creature to ever walk the earth, or that I feel like I have been created for the universe to be amused at my torment.”

“Yet to me, you are a creature full of beauty and grace. You are wonderful, your face is, too. Do you not think I would have left if I wanted to?” Your response to her words is silence. Unfortunately for your brain, she has a point. She could leave in a heartbeat, you couldn’t stop her if you pleaded. She stays, though. Doesn’t that say enough?

“If I didn’t know better, I would say you are a descendant of a goddess. So, how dare you speak about yourself in that way? I did not fall for your friends, or some girl on the street. I demand nothing but the best for myself, and that is exactly what I have. Next time you feel this way, you come to me.”

[imtryingbuck]

Reflections

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x plus-size fem!Reader

Summary: You don’t like your reflection but Bucky makes sure you know how beautiful you are

Word count: 671

Warnings: body hate (EVERY BODY IS PERFECT) sad reader, perfect Bucky.

Masterlist

Your eyes trailed the light purple lines mapping your stomach and arms with disgust. The sight of your stomach makes you wish you could rip it off and throw it in the trash. 

Your eyes shift from your reflection to the photos hanging from the fairy lights that you hung up. The images of you and Bucky smiling, photos of you and your friends happy and carefree were mocking you, you were sure of it.

The one photo of you and Bucky, with his arm around your waist with huge, genuine smiles plastered on your faces, standing on the soft sand at the beach you both went to - you couldn’t help but cringe at yourself wearing a swimsuit. You remember how happy and proud Bucky looked seeing you in that swimsuit, he was so determined to get you to wear it. Over and over again he told you how stunning you looked. You remember how happy you were.

Now you stand in front of the mirror wondering where that happiness and self-love went.

You couldn’t understand why Bucky was with you when he could have anyone else, someone that wasn’t overweight, someone that didn’t have stretch marks on most parts of her body. 

It had been three years since you two got together and while you’re happy and felt comfortable with and around Bucky you just can’t help but question - why is he with you?

Bucky’s just finished in the shower, he watches you from the doorway with a towel snug tight around his waist.

His heart does a double take at you standing there in matching underwear, he’s truly never seen of a more beautiful sight. He leans against the door with a small smile on his face as he admires you, like he does everyday.

Then that smile drops along with his stomach. There’s tears rolling down your cheeks.

“Y/n, baby what’s wrong?” His feet can’t move fast enough towards you.

“N-nothing”

“You’re crying.”

“It’s fine babe, let’s get dressed” You try and move away from him.

“Again, you’re crying.”

“Buck-“

“Baby please just talk to me! I hate seeing you crying”

“It-it doesn’t matter I promise I’m fine”

Wrapping his hand around your arm he gently tugs you towards the bed, he sits and pulls you onto his lap. “Talk. To. Me”

“Can I ask you something?” You ask.

“Of course doll”

“Why are you with me?” The words come out as a whisper.

“W-what?”

“Why are you with me Bucky?”

“Because I love you” He’s says without hesitation.

“But why?” You try and pull away but his arms tighten around you.

“Because my love you’re my happiness, my joy, my heart, my soul and mind. I love everything about you, from the top of your head, to the tip of your toes and every part in between” he ends each statement with a kiss, darting around your face “And baby you’re so beautiful, so God damn beautiful”

The waterfall of tears wouldn’t stop. Even with his words of affection you just couldn’t stop the words from coming out.

“I’m fat Bucky, you shouldn’t be with m-“

“Stand up.”

“What?”

“Stand up and go to the mirror”

Doing as he says, you walk over to the mirror. He follows, standing behind you.

Placing his large hands on your belly “This belly? Perfection” His hands then trail to your thighs “These…” A deep groan slips from his mouth “these thighs baby, perfection” His fingers slowly slide up your sides tickling you as they go “your arms, perfection.”

Resting his head on your shoulder he smiles “you are perfect baby, I don’t care what anyone says or what you think. I love every inch of you, I worship the ground you walk on”

“Buck I-I… really?”

“Really my beautiful” A mischievous smirk pulls on his lips “Why don’t I take you to bed and show you how much I love you?”

You release a squeal of laughter as he picks you up and takes you to bed.

~ banner credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

[larissasgirl]

I always love seeing new writers! Could I request some fluff with regina and insecure reader??

I will never let you go again

Welcome to my first storyyyy my guys! I was surprised at how easy it was to actually write, I hope this is what you had in mind! I'm sorry if there is any mistake :-)

You thought you had a pretty good reading of the situation, but now, you weren’t sure where you stood with her. Your first encounter with Regina wasn’t exactly what you’d call love at first sight. In fact, she had insulted you, ripped your heart out and left you at the border of Storybrooke to walk home. But then, you slowly warmed up to each other. It started by acknowledging each other, then politely smiling at each other if you’d come across one another in the little town. Then, it was dinner invitations, drinking apple cider on her couch and deep conversations until the early hours of the morning.

And now, you were feeling so unsure, so insecure. It led to locking yourself in your apartment, thoughts racing through your head. In the past two weeks, Regina had been distant, too distant. You didn’t understand why she had texted you earlier this morning to cancel your usual dinner at her place, or why she wouldn’t answer any of your messages and calls. Truth to be told, you were heartbroken. Surely enough, this wasn’t just an innocent friendship to you. You knew she wasn’t the Evil Queen anymore, that she wasn’t this person that got described to you many times by the citizens of Storybrooke. She was the proof that anyone can change. She was fierce, something you had always admired about her, and you had always pitied anyone that ever got on her bad side, knowing you had once been there, as her strong personality mixed with anger was sometimes scary. You had seen her beautiful brown orbs shine with fire, and despite your heart screaming at you to fix it, to fix your friendship or whatever it was, your head had eventually won the fight. You had stopped calling. You had stopped showing up on her doorstep, knocking on her door only to be met with silence even though you knew she was home. If you were being honest with yourself, her message from this morning was your last straw. You were too broken to continue fighting. 

You felt as if your light has gone out. You’d only got out at crazy hours in the evenings, when you were sure you wouldn’t meet anyone, or at least, very few people, and especially not her, to get some groceries and cheap wine to drown your sorrows. You knew your eyes were constantly red and puffy from crying over someone who so clearly sent a message without literally doing so. Regina didn’t feel the same way than you did, and there was nothing you could do about it. So should you hang on to something that would only extend your pain? 

So instead of giggling with Regina like you would do usually every Friday night, you found yourself sitting on the couch, and old episode of Friends running in the background as you were having yet another glass of wine, hoping it would lure you to the sleep you craved so much, but couldn’t find as easily as before. You were wearing an old hoodie with gray sweatpants, an outfit you had gotten at university during your studies. You could feel your legs falling asleep from being crossed for such a long period of time, but you didn’t bother to move them, concentrating on the tingling sensation, hoping it would somehow take over your sadness. 

Halfway through the bottle, you heard a knock on your door. As your posture straightened up, the blanket that you had draped over your shoulders slide down, the cold air making its way to you even with the hood you had folded on your head. You weren’t really in the mood to see anyone, especially on yours and Regina’s evening. Your mind was working slower as usual, a result of the alcohol you were consuming. Yet, you shrugged and decided to ignore it, pretending you weren’t home when your mind was still clear enough to tell you that the lights were on, that the tv was loud and that the person behind the door probably noticed all of that too. Yet, another knock came to your ears not long after the first, and you knew whoever was there had no intention of going away. You figured it was either Emma or Snow checking on you, both knowing how hard you’d been taking Regina’s silence. Knowing it wouldn’t be easy to send them on their way if you didn’t answer the door, you sloppily got up from the couch, cursing as you bumped your calf into the table in front of the couch as you made your way to the front door. 

You didn’t get a chance to open your mouth to say you were fine, as the person standing in front of you was the one that was clouding your mind for the past two week. Your eyes locked with hers, and you noticed that she was still wearing her work clothes, a silk white blouse tucked into black pants, a beige coat keeping her warm from the cold air of the night. You noticed that she was also evaluating the state you were in, her eyes going from your sweatpants to your hoodie, to the wine bottle that was resting on the table behind you, her gaze softening as her brown orbs met yours again. 

“Hi,” she began softly, as if she was scared you’d break, as if she thought you were as fragile as glass. And truth to be told, you did look like you would, like you were holding on by a thread. 

You opened your mouth to answer, only to close it again, no words not coming out. “Can I come in?”, her voice cracking as she cleared her throat, fidgeting with her fingers as you noticed the black leather gloves she had on.

You simply nodded, opening the door for her to see the mess your apartment was. She had the decency to not say anything, knowing you were always a tidy person, even if the sight of the dirty dishes piling in the sink, the empty pizza boxes sitting on the counter and the pile of clean clothes unfolded resting on the kitchen table made her jaw clench. You knew she loved order over chaos, which is why you always tried to keep your place clean, but you didn’t think she’d actually witness the mess it was right now. Regina knew she was the reason for this, for the state she had found you in. She was no idiot. She had noticed the way your smile got wider every single time she’d walk in a room, the way you’d always pick the seat right next to her at Granny’s even if the one in front of her was available, the way you’d always hug her a little longer than anyone else. And she knew she did the same. Her day lightened up when she’d catch a glimpse of you, if you name would light up her phone, if she’d hear your voice or your laugh. And knowing she was causing you so much distress was breaking her heart even more than it was already. She made her way to the couch, her eyes never leaving your frame as you did the same.

“I’m sorry,” she simply stated, as you took the furthest spot possible from her on the couch. Her heart sank a little, jealously hoping you’d still want to be next to her, to be close to her. “I’m sorry I canceled our evening together.”, she muttered the last part, not trusting her own voice.

You closed your eyes, trying to keep the tears at bay. You couldn’t look at her, you couldn’t bear to see her expression as she would tell you it was a misunderstanding, that you were simply very close friends. Yet, you knew this conversation had to happen one day of another, so you’d rather it be now, while the wine was making it seem like a cushion you could rest on as it would unfold. You braced yourself for it and opened your eyes, choosing to fix your gaze on the side of the blanket that was messily unfolded in front of you.

“Why?,” you managed to whisper, your voice cracking at the end, as your grabbed the corner of the blanket, fidgeting with the edge. You felt Regina move from her seat, causing your heart to beat even harder in your chest. She instead sat right next to you, her now glove-free hand resting on top of yours, stopping your movements. She then used the other one to gently grab your chin, lifting it up slowly so you’d meet her eyes. You noticed she had taken off her coat, but you didn’t have the strength to look away from her gaze, her eyes piercing into yours. 

Your breath stopped once again, seeing the remorse and the hurt that was shining in them. All you wanted to do was to wrap your arms around her and hold her, to make all of it disappear. Yet, you couldn’t, your own pain a reminder it was her who had been avoiding you, and not the opposite.

“I got scared,” she hesitated before continuing, noticing you were sitting still and that your eyes hadn’t left hers. This seemed to give her the bravery to continue. “I-I want what’s best for you, Y/N. I love spending time with you, I look forward it every day. I wake up and my first thought is you. I go to bed and my last thought is you. I-I’m in love with you and it scared me,” she blurted, her cheeks tinted with a soft red color. “I don’t know what I thought. That maybe if I distanced myself from you, it would go away. But I missed you so much. I was sitting at home by myself, and I couldn’t stop thinking about you, about our evenings together…If I hadn’t ruined everything”, she continued in a low voice, her grip on your hand tightening, as if she was scared you’d run away, that you’d slip from her touch and reject her. Yet, it was like you were hypnotized by her, as if she had put a spell on you to keep you still, your mind registering her words one at the time, almost jokingly slowly. 

“I have been avoiding you because I got scared to have fallen in love with you, but being without you is an even scarier feeling,” she confessed, her eyes swelling up with tears. You had never seen Regina so vulnerable, despite the closeness of your relationship. And almost as if you were being remotely controlled, you felt your hand free itself from hers, making her gasp, probably thinking she was indeed right and that you were rejecting her after her past actions. Instead, you caught the tear that was falling on her cheek, causing even more to make their way down her beautiful features.

“I thought you didn’t want to be near me anymore”, you finally confessed to her, tears falling on your cheeks as well. You took a deep breath, preparing yourself for the confession you were about to make. “Since I’m not a hero, or anything, really”, you mumbled, shaking your head, trying to put some orders in your thoughts as your deepest fear was finally out in the open. 

She cupped your face, wiping your tears with her thumbs as she pressed a soft kiss on your right cheek, so softly that it felt like a feather was brushing against your skin. You closed your eyes under her touch, the one you had been craving for ever since you had realized you had feelings for Regina.

“You’re not anything, Y/N. You’re the woman I love,” she whispered, her lips brushing against your skin as she spoke, smiling softly as she heard a soft sight coming out of your lips at the contact. You weren’t aware that you did. Your mind was blank. You couldn’t move, couldn’t speak. Was she really saying she felt the same way you did all this time? That it was a misunderstanding? And she had kissed your cheek? You had hugged before, but you had never felt the softness of her lips on your skin, which truthfully didn’t help with registering the situation. It felt like hours when a minute probably went by. Regina’s lips were still brushing against your cheek, her eyelashes tickling your skin every time she’d blink even if her posture was completely immobile, as if she wanted to take in the closeness she had with if you’d decide to move away from her. The chaos in your heart was instead replaced by relief, by disbelief for the words you had been craving to hear for so long.

Finally coming back to your sense, you grabbed the hands that were still resting on your cheeks, moving your body so your forehead was now touching hers, your noses brushing against each other.

“You love me?” your voice sounding so small, so foreign to her ears that she was scared words would fail her, as she simply nodded. “Don’t ever do this to me again,” you whispered, smiling softly even though she couldn’t see you. Regina instead had other idea, wanting to see your face, wanting to read the depth of your mind in your eyes, as she distanced herself from you to do so, wrapping her arms around your neck in an attempt to keep you as close to her as possible. The frown on her face was quickly replaced by a smile matching yours, pure adoration written cross her features as light seemed to have returned to your eyes.

“I could never,” she stated, shaking her head, her perfume reaching your senses and embracing you, making you feel calmer, safer, loved. “I’d rip my own heart out.”

“Don’t do that, “you giggled, biting your bottom lip in the process. “I love you too, in case you were wondering,” you beamed at her, your mind finally catching up to what had just happened, the weight on the world having finally being lifted off your shoulders. The smile she gave you then completely turned your world upside down, the kind of smile that made your knees go weak, making you thankful you were sitting down. You were living for that smile, you’d do anything to see it, to have it directed just at you. 

Regina moved a piece of your hair away from your face, her hand resting on the back of your neck. Your skin felt on fire, your heart threatening to jump out of your chest. She glanced at your lips for a second, and you did the same, licking your lips in an automated gesture. She slowly leaned forward, giving you enough time to move away if it was your wish. Instead, you closed the distance and met her lips. Goosebumps rose on your skin as she gently pulled you towards her, as if she was afraid you’d disappear, her arms wrapped around your neck as yours found their way around her waist. The kiss was gentle, even more than you’d have imagined if possible, but yet, so passionate, filled with all the emotions you so desperately tried to express to each other. She eventually pulled away, leaving you gasping for air, as you immediately thought that you wanted to kiss her again and again for the rest of your life. She had her eyes closed still, a soft smiling playing on her lips, and so you leaned in again, making her giggle as your lips met hers, this time only lasting a few seconds, an attempt to convince yourself it was really happening. As you pulled away, she brushed her nose against yours before kissing it. 

“Now that it’s settled,” she chuckled, getting up from the couch and pulling you with her, “Let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow, we have some cleaning to do,” she grinned as she motioned towards the mess around you, as you rolled your eyes and got up to give her some clothes for the night, Regina never letting go of your hand.

[rory-multifandom-mess]

This might be an odd request, but if you’re interested could you do Jhad angst with prompts 2 and 21? I get it’s a pretty niche ship, but I’ve seen your other work and I’m interested on your take of the pairing.

Brother I shit you not I was JUST talking about this ship right before you sent this ask I am not even kidding. The timing on this was amazing. Here’s the screenshots of my exact reaction

ANYWAY I’d gladly do this pairing!! I think it would be really cute and I may or may not be thinking about writing a slow burn for it eheheheh

2. “Please don’t leave me” and 21. “I’m better when I’m with you”

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

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.

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Alone. A word that kept repeating in J’s head.

She was alone again, just like before, just like she always was. Just like before the manor, and after the massacre. She couldn’t win. She just couldn’t win.

Tessa was her friend, yet she was ripped away from her by that damn thing. V was her friend, yet she ruined that by siding with it.

Why couldn’t V just understand? It was the only way to survive. There was no escape, even in death… Though apparently she was wrong. Because they won. Solver was gone, and she was alone again.

J sighed as she gripped the blow torch harder, repairing the ship she had unceremoniously blown up.

She grit her teeth together, memories of their battle flashing before her, of Cyn using Tessa’s skin as a suit.

Suddenly, the blowtorch snapped in half from the pressure, the metal dented.

“Damnit!” J exclaimed, angrily throwing it into the snow beneath her. She jumped off the ship and kicked the broken torch further away, fists clenched by her side.

“Yikes-“ A voice said nearby, by the exit of the corpse spire.

J immediately swiveled around, one of her hands switching out for a rocket launcher as she aimed in its direction.

The worker drone flinched and fumbled with whatever it was he was holding before putting his hands up, eyebrows raised.

“Woah, J, relax!” He said.

“Oh.” J huffed, lowering her arm.

It was Thad, the one worker drone she managed to befriend. Well, more like he befriended her, despite her previous attempt to kill him. Granted, it was at least a few months after she had attacked that bunker.

She’d first met him in the woods, just outside of the abandoned city where “Tessa” was scouting out. She’d put J on watch duty.

At first, J didn’t bother to interact with him. But then she kept seeing him, and he’d only look even more sad and cold each time. Eventually, it turned into pity. She’d visit him while Boss was scoping the planet.

She would never admit it, but she slowly grew acquainted with this strange Worker Drone. Maybe it’s because it reminded her of the manor, when life was simpler. Maybe it’s because he reminded her so much of Tessa, goofy and dorky and funny and caring all the same. It was a breath of fresh air.

That was, until boss pulled her away from him too, because she finally had a lead.

J wouldn’t see him again for a while, at least not until everything came to a head and it was finally time for Solver to finish what it had started on the planet. They hadn’t gotten to talk at all, of course, everything was so intense, but she had noticed that he was hesitant to attack her before the planet had suddenly broken into pieces.

“What do you want? Here to mock me?” She asked with a snarl.

“Uh… no,” Thad said, scratching the back of his head. “I wanted to check up on you, actually.”

Her gaze softened as Thad walked further in.

“Y’know, that whole big battle seemed really intense. Thought you could use some company, since…” He trailed off.

J crossed her arms, putting her weight on one of her legs. “Because everyone hates me now?”

Sweat ran down his visor. He blinked and nodded slightly.

“I wanted to give you this.” He held out the item he had been holding to her.

It was a plush of a pink rabbit, its ears, arms, and legs floppy. It had button eyes and a white belly, yet it looked dirty with oil and debris. J took it from his hands and turned it slightly, looking at it.

Her expression softened more.

She loved plushies, even now after all this time since the manor days. She had missed just being able to hold one close and play with it. She gently squeezed its torso.

“…Thank you, Thad.” She said, glancing away and furrowing her brows, “But I don’t… I don’t need plushies.”

Thad raised an eyebrow. “Then why did you hesitate?”

J stopped for a moment, then moved the plush to her other hand, her claws extruding from the other as she pointed them at Thad.

“Don’t forget I can kill you right now!” She threatened, baring her teeth.

Thad put his hands up again, but only chuckled. “C’mon, J. You know you don’t have to hide anything anymore, right? You don’t have to pretend to be something you’re not. It’s gone. It can’t hurt you anymore.”

J froze. How did Thad know any of that? He was just a worker drone. There was no way he could’ve just said that on a whim.

He was right. She knew that. But— how?-

“I, uh… I asked V, N, and Uzi to give me a run down on everything,” Thad admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t fully understand everything, but from what I got, it… sounded pretty rough. For all of you.”

J felt her legs start to shake. First, anger, but then confusion and relief, all hit at once. Someone knew, someone, for the most part, understood, wanted to understand, wanted to understand her. Her expression twisted, trying to keep the emotions at bay, but the softness of his voice, the tone, the look he was giving.

It all made her so weak, in such a good way.

J lowered her arms and hung her head, arms shaking, her fists clenched around the bunny plush.

“And yet, after all of what they told you, you still want to talk to me?” She asked incredulously, her voice shaking slightly.

“Of course I do. You were there for me when I was stuck in the woods, even if you were mostly mocking me.” He chuckled at the memory, then added, “I’m repaying the favor.”

J glanced away from him, hugging her arms.

“Thanks, I guess.”

Thad smiled up at her, then looked past her at the ship.

“What’re you working on?” He asked.

She followed his gaze, then groaned.

“The ship. I was repairing it after I blew it up- You know, as an… apology to V. And N and Uzi, I guess,” She explained, “But I just broke the only welder I had.”

“Oh!” Thad perked up. “Want me to go grab you one?”

J looked at him again, confused. “Why?”

Thad shrugged. “Why not? I don’t want you to be lonely out here forever, J.”

Her core shook.

“Be right back, kay?” He said, turning on his heel and sprinting back out of the spire.

J watched after him until he disappeared behind the corpse walls. She looked down at the snowy footprints he made in his wake, tracing her eyes over each ridge of the shoe tracks.

She turned back to the ship, her mind wandering as she hugged her arms.

Now that she thought about it more, Thad really did remind her so much of Tessa in many more ways that she thought. They were both so bright and bubbly all the time, yet they bruised so easily. They were fragile, one and the same yet two separate people. Two separate things.

She was athletic, just like him. He was kind, just like her. He smiled with his teeth, just like she did when she laughed. She would glow when she was happy, and so would he.

He made stupid jokes just like she would, and would sometimes mess with her just to get a reaction. J gripped her arms tighter and closed her eyes.

The day of the Gala. Tessa’s left arm was hurt. It was bruised, yet untreated. J wanted to help, but she couldn’t.

“I’m ‘right, J.” Tessa would tell her, smiling nervously and rubbing the bruise with her hand.

She could tell she wasn’t alright. It hurt still, even moreso emotionally, she figured. But J never got to express how much she cared, because in the end all she was to Tessa was a pet. Something to be admired and laugh at, something that wasn’t supposed to have or understand the same complex feelings that a human possessed.

J knew she was more than that.

Then, before she and Cyn had reached the cabin fever labs. She found Thad in the woods again, hunched over and sitting in the snow, holding his left leg tightly. When she walked over, he looked up at her and smiled.

“Hey! What’s up?” He’d say, cheerfully, attempting to mask the pain he was in, albeit terribly.

“What happened to your leg?” She would ask, sounding stern and uncaring, her arms crossed across her chest, portraying faux feelings of apathy toward him.

“Oh— It’s nothin. I’m alright, J.” He’d promised, smiling up at her nervously.

Her heart swelled. He even talked like her sometimes.

J opened her eyes again and looked up at the glittering stars above her, a complacent expression playing on her face.

It was a surprisingly clear night out that night, the stars clear and twinkling softly, looking back down at her.

Thad was everything Tessa was and more, wasn’t he? He cared about J. He wanted her to have friends, to learn how to live with them so she wouldn’t have to live alone forever, regretting the decisions she made and the pain she caused.

He held his hand out for her, much like Tessa did, but this time, as a friend. Not as an owner, guiding a lost dog to her home. Thad had picked her up despite her flaws and tendencies, to try and guide her down a path of love and joy.

Not to mention, he was as handsome as his personality. J would never admit it herself, but he looked nice. Nicer than most male worker drones she had come across and ultimately slaughtered. For a moment, she wondered why he, of all drones, had hair, despite most males not having any, from what she could tell. So full of mystery as well, wasn’t he?

Just then, J froze, her head snapping back down as she stared into the distance, her eyelights hollow and blush forming beneath them.

“…Oh no…” She said slowly, the realization kicking in. “No no no!” She exclaimed, hiding her hands in her face.

She had fallen for him. And hard. Either it was because he was so much like Tessa, or because he was just himself, it didn’t matter. She liked him; no, she loved him, just as she had Tessa.

But— how could he ever love her back? She tried to kill him— She tried to kill everyone. She sided with the thing that was trying to eat the planet and kill everyone else with it. N, V, and Uzi undoubtedly hate her, and worst of all— …She was a failure. All of this time trying to be the best, and she couldn’t even do one thing right.

She failed Tessa. She failed to be the best maid, she failed to keep her safe. She failed Cyn, and the company. She was sent to do a job, yet she couldn’t even complete it.

She was pathetic.

The sound of snow crunching underfoot broke her from her thoughts, a gentle tap on her shoulder.

She flinched and turned her head.

It was Thad, looking at her with concern. “Are you okay?”

Don’t look at me like that.

“Yeah. I’m- I’m perfect!” J said, straightening her posture and turning to him, her tail swaying close to the ground. “Just fine.”

Thad tilted his head, then shrugged. He held out the welder to her.

“Here. Just don’t break it this time,” He joked.

She rolled her eyes at him. “Yeah yeah”

J’s wings appeared from her back again and flared out as the anti-gravity jets roared to life, sending her up so she could gracefully land on the top of the landing pod again, carefully welding the metal pieces together. She watched Thad out of the corner of her eye.

He put his hands into his pockets and watched, leaning back and forth on his feet. Despite his body language, he didn’t look bored. He seemed more intrigued than anything, looking over the ship in its whole, or at least as whole as it was at the moment.

J glanced at him.

“Why are you still here? Shouldn’t you go back to the bunker now?” She asked, putting on an annoyed facade.

“It’s the middle of the night, man,” Thad explained, “No one knows I’m here. And I don’t have to get to school for another two hours.”

J huffed. “Well, you better not distract me,” She said.

Please talk to me.

Thad put his hands up and nodded. “You got it, J.”

No, not like that. Stop acting like her.

J drew her eyes away from him and back at the metal she was welding, trying to focus. But her thoughts always went back to him. She couldn’t get him out of her head. Just the thought of hugging him was enough to make her mind spiral, and the idea of holding him made her feel like melting.

She was hyper aware of all movement in the area - a side effect that came from being a disassembly drone - so every small subtle move he made was enough to gain a glance from her. When he shifted his weight, or moved his hands, or took a few steps forward, she’d notice and look at him.

Suddenly, his words broke through the icy air.

“Hey, J.”

J glanced up at him, then back at her welding job.

“What?”

A smile slowly grew on Thad’s face, getting an idea.

“What’s this thing for anyway?” He asked, knocking on a metal panel, “Trying to build some kind of forest creature?”

J paused, looking at him in confusion. “You, of all people, should know what a space ship like this is for.”

Thad shrugged. “I mean, if you look at it from an angle, it kinda looks like a messed up spider.”

J simply rolled her eyes and returned to welding the metal panels. She moved to another support and lifted another metal panel, holding it against the metal already attached to the ship.

Thad seemed to stare at her for a moment, then glanced away.

It was times like these where J wished solver granted them the power of mind reading. She wanted to know what was going on inside that little brain of his. Two out of her six eyes squinted at him, the remaining four focused on the welding.

The only thing that filled the air was the crackle of the welder and the howling of the wind for a moment, until Thad interrupted.

“Hey, JJ!” He called.

“What, Thad?” She asked, the eyes on her display deadpanning.

“I bet your humor is as hard to catch as a frisbee in the wind!” He said with full confidence, a wide dorky grin on his face, his hands on his hips.

Stop doing that. Stop being like her. What is wrong with you?

J stifled a smile and rolled her eyes. “Yeah, well maybe you aren’t trying hard enough.”

“Ooh, playing hard to get! I like it!” He teased, pointing at her with finger-guns and winking, “Challenge accepted.”

J shook her head. What was he doing? What challenge? What was the point of this? What was he going to gain out of this?

J’s mind raced so much, she nearly welded her hand to the ship.

Now he was doing the one thing she told him not to do. Distract her. Granted, him merely being there was enough to distract her at first, so maybe he wasn’t at fault.

“Ooh! I got a good one,” He said, a mischievous look in his eyes as he rubbed his hands together.

“What’s white and has wheels?” He asked, anticipation in his voice.

J paused for a moment, thinking. She tilted her head slightly. In all the jokes that Tessa had told her, this was one she was unfamiliar with. Her mind went to the first most logical answer she could think of.

“A bike?” She said, hesitating.

“The snow! I lied about the wheels!” Thad basically shouted, throwing his arms into the air with a large grin across his face. She noticed that some of his teeth were strangely sharp.

“That doesn’t even make any sense,” She said, rolling her eyes and returning to her welding.

“Sure it does!” Thad said with a snicker, “You gotta stop thinking so literally about everything, J.”

She stopped, if only for a moment. She remembered when Tessa had told her that, after making a dumb joke like that, with the same gesture and the same, proud grin.

Her grip tightened on the welding tool.

Thad paced around, thinking of what to try next. She glanced at him.

Seriously, what was he doing? He kept saying random jokes, despite the fact she told him not to distract her. It’s not like she was going to do anything to stop him, she liked the jokes, it just—

WOAH. No! She did not like the jokes! She didn’t like jokes! Jokes were stupid and wasted time— There wasn’t any point to them, they made no sense—

Suddenly, she heard a thud and flinched, breaking her from her thoughts once again. Her head snapped to the sound, only to see Thad stumble back from one of the ship’s legs and fall into the snow, holding his foot with a pained expression.

J couldn’t help but snicker at his misfortune, confused but delighted.

He opened an eye and looked up at her, surprised to hear her snickering. She turned her head away quickly and covered her mouth, stifling her laughter.

She lowered her head and shook it, trying to keep herself calm. Behind her, she heard Thad call her name. She looked up and turned her head to him, curious.

Right as she turned her head to him, he began sprinting up a mound of snow, only to purposefully slip and tumble down the mound, landing on his stomach. He looked up at her expectantly.

J simply stared at Thad, her eyelights half-lidded. She shook her head and averted her attention back to her welding. She was almost done with the panel.

Honestly, watching him get thrown around was kind of funny, especially since he was throwing himself around. All that, just to get her to-

The realization hit her like a bowling ball.

Those silly jokes, the stupid looks, the dumb actions that would end in him getting hurt— they were all for her. To get her to laugh and ‘loosen up a little,’ as Tessa would put it.

Dear God, he’s just like her. Why is he so much like her? What is wrong with him?!

“Oh!” Thad suddenly exclaimed, causing J to stop welding. It was alright, though. She had just finished a panel.

She groaned, trying her hardest to keep her front up, and hopped off the ship, picking up another panel.

“What did one corporate say to the other?” Thad asked, excited to tell the joke, eagerness in his voice.

J raised an eyebrow as she shook the panel off, dusting snow from it. She was intrigued this time. Thad didn’t seem the type to know anything about corporations.

“What?” She asked.

“Nothing, because they’re bad at diplomacy!” He announced proudly, almost way too excited to see her reaction.

J stifled her laughter, quickly raising the new panel over her face so he wouldn’t see the look on her face.

She was smiling because of his dumb joke. It was funny, of course it was funny, and it made sense- and she was sure Thad picked up on her attempt to cover her laugh.

She tried to play it off, lunging back onto the pod with the panel in hand. In the corner of her eyes, she saw Thad’s goofy grin, and knew that trying to hide it had already failed.

A silence fell between the two of them as Thad began to pace, presumably thinking of more jokes, scratching his chin. Whenever he’d think of one, he’d stop and blurt it out. Of course, most of his jokes needed her to respond, but J didn’t mind that.

With each joke, J would giggle just a little bit more than before, even snorting quietly once. She couldn’t help it.

The way he delivered each joke with enthusiasm and the tone of a comedian, his stupid, adorable little face, full of excitement and pure joy, his face brightening whenever he’d hear her giggles.

She had to admit, his charm was irresistible.

She slowly began to forget her worries, forgetting how much Thad and Tessa had in common.

After a prolonged silence, Thad stopped in his pacing again.

“Oh! What do you do if you get the bird flu?” He asked, that same silly grin playing on his face.

J leaned back and looked at him with a smile. “What?”

“You get— …Uh…” Thad trailed off, glancing at the snow.

“Wait, I— I forgot the punchline,” He chuckled softly as he spoke, furrowing his brows as he tried to remember.

J snickered. “Take your time.” She said smugly, turning back to her welding.

Silence fell between the two again as he wracked his brain, trying to remember. J almost forgot he had even started to set up a punchline.

Suddenly, Thad’s head jolted back up as he shouted.

“Tweetment!” He exclaimed, his voice so loud it echoed through the barren outdoors.

J finally couldn’t hold in her giggles anymore, a hearty laugh erupting from her throat as she leaned back from the spot she was welding. Her legs slipped, sending her careening off of the pod and into the snow, still laughing and smiling, snorting every once in a while.

Thad grinned at her, admiring her smile and the way she laughed. He loved every snort, every giggle, every time she would roll on the ground, clutching her sides as she couldn’t stop from laughing.

He had succeeded in getting her to let loose, at least for now.

He chuckled, approaching her from the side and leaning forward slightly to hover over her face, placing his hands on his knees.

“It’s nice to see you smile like this, Jaybird,” He said softly, his expression kind and full of adoration.

J’s heart exploded in her chest, butterflies in her stomach as her eyelights hollowed at what he had just said.

Tessa’s voice echoed in her head.

“It’s nice t’see ya smile like this, Jaybird!”

That same smile. That same nickname. That same damned expression and tone of joy and pride. Those damned green eyes.

J quickly sat up and shoved his face away, turning away from him and curling up in a ball, her hands on her head.

Thad yelped and stumbled back slightly, trying not to fall.

Damn it all! Why do you have to be like this, you stupid toaster! Why? …Why me? Is this my punishment? Is this what I get?

Her mind raced, a swirl of emotions, anger and sorrow and melancholy, her core pounding in her ears.

“J?” Thad asked, concerned, rubbing his face.

She didn’t respond, her arms beginning to tremble.

She hated him. No, she hated herself. How could she let this happen? How could she allow herself to fall so heavily for this little drone? He was so much like Tessa, yet so different at the same time. She craved to hear his voice and feel his touch all the same as she did with Tessa, yet somehow stronger.

Thad’s worry only grew as he stepped forward, placing a hand on her shoulder. “C’mon, Jaybird, talk to me. What’s up?” He asked again.

That stupid nickname!

He was so much like her. But what if he was too much like her? What if she had fallen for someone with the same quirks and personality and phrases as her first crush, just for them to be ripped away again? Just for her heart to be taken and stomped on and spit on all over again? What if he didn’t like her back? What if he was just there because he thought she was pitiful?

“…You’re so much like her,” J finally muttered, not lifting her head, her voice shaking. Despite her doubts, despite everything— she decided to tell Thad what was going on. Maybe not about how badly she wanted to kiss him, though. Not yet.

“…What?” Thad responded, sitting next to her in the snow.

“Tessa. Cyn was wearing her skin, you know.”

Thad’s eyebrows raised. “…Oh.”

J chuckled sadly, hugging her legs. “I’m such an idiot, Thad.”

She paused for a moment, waiting for Thad to react, though he didn’t.

“I sided with that thing because I thought there was no point in fighting. I knew what it could do. V and I both did.” She sniffled. “It toyed with us. It used us to slaughter billions, all three of us.”

As she began to explain, Thad sat beside her and rubbed comforting circles on her back, listening closely.

“It used us to kill Tess’s family. It used us to kill her. It wore her skin like a badge… I still remember her screams.”

Finally, J’s head lifted. She looked out at the snow, her eyelights hollow, digital tears wavering in the corners of them.

“…I tried to fight back, Thad. Before all of this— I wanted to stop it. But I never won. It would always kill me and then clone me again. There was no escape, even in death.” J paused again, then huffed. “Guess I was wrong.”

it became silent between the two. The air around them turned sour, dampened by J’s experiences.

She sniffled and sobbed, internally berating herself for being so vulnerable in front of a stupid adorable worker drone. She was pathetic.

“…Geez,” Thad finally muttered, “I can’t imagine how I’d feel if I was in your situation.”

J didn’t say anything.

“I… I don’t think you did anything wrong, J.”

She turned her head to him.

“Sure, you made some mistakes,” Thad said, shrugging, “but you were just scared. You did what you thought was right, even if it wasn’t the best. Everyone makes mistakes.”

J stared at him. “How can you not be mad at me?”

Thad thought for a moment, glancing at the stars. Then, he looked back at her. “Because everyone has their own story. You were forced to kill someone you were super close to. You gave up, because you couldn’t fight back. You only wanted to survive.”

He paused, then smiled. “In the end, that’s all any of us want, right? That’s why the Worker Drones fled under the ice when you guys showed up.”

J looked into his lime green eyes. Her heart swelled. He was genuine. He didn’t hate her. He actually understood her. He was finally someone who cared enough to see her side of the story, to listen to her grief and fear and empathize.

Something Tessa failed to do.

Tears welled up in her eyes again as she dropped her head back into her knees, hugging her legs.

Thad frowned, his brows furrowing in concern. He gently leaned on her, awkwardly slinging his arm around her shoulders and patting her arm.

“It’s okay. You’re gonna be okay, J,” He reassured, speaking slowly and softly.

Stop doing that.

She hated this. She hated being vulnerable like this, sobbing pathetically into her knees while a Worker Drone leaned on her, comforting her. She hated that it was working. She hated that she needed comfort. She had said it before, she would say it again. She didn’t need anybody.

…But deep down, she knew that wasn’t true. Without someone to boss her around, what was she worth? If she couldn’t do a job, what was the point? That was the real reason she had started to put that stupid pod back together.

Most of all, J hated how much she crumbled around Thad. She hated how much he reminded her of Tessa, and how she fell for him just like she did her. Just because they cared. Just because they were trying to save her from a terrible path. She hated how pathetic she was.

She was suddenly broken from her thoughts by the sound of an alarm. She hadn’t even realized she stopped crying. How long were they sitting there for?

Thad jolted upright, slapping his face.

“Crap! I stayed out too long! I’m sorry, J, but I gotta bolt!” He said in a panic, quickly scrambling to his feet.

J perked up as well, but quickly turned, her knees hitting the snow as she reached up and grabbed his wrist.

“Wait!” She called.

He stopped and looked back at her, surprised.

She looked back up at him. Blush spread across her visor as her jaw hung open, eyelights hollow.

Wait. What am I doing?! She thought, panic rushing through her wiring.

“…Uh… P…Please… don’t leave me.” She asked quietly, glancing away, “I… I, uh… I feel better when I’m around you, Thad.”

She groaned and pulled her hand away, covering her face.

“God, I’m so pathetic, aren’t I…?” She asked no one in particular.

Thad didn’t seem to move for a second. Then, he dropped down onto his knees and gently grabbed her hands, pulling them off her face with a soft smile.

“No no, it’s okay! What’s one missed day of school, right?” He shrugged, “It’s Friday anyway. I’ll stay. I promise.”

J looked at him in the eyes, her processor running at two miles an hour. She felt so conflicted— she wanted him to stay, but her pride— like it wasn’t already damaged enough— but it’s a Worker Drone! I don’t need pity from a worker drone—

“…Thank you.” She muttered, cracking a small smile.

Thad smiled back.

“No probbles.”

J snickered.

“Such a dumb abbreviation.”

She didn’t care. She could sit like this for the rest of forever.

.

.

.

HOOLLLYYY SHIIIT. LONGEST ONE OF THESE EVER I APOLOGIZE FOR ALL OF YOUR DASHBOARDS. ANYWAY. I'm so sorry this took fucking ages to complete, my personal life has been so so busy.

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED ANYWAY!! This was so so much fun to write, I love exploring J's character. AUGH. Don't worry Thad eventually helps her get over Tessa :D

Also so sorry to all the people who are waiting on their requests , especially to those who have been waiting since August. Life has been busy and I've been unmotivated. I'm hoping to get back to it whenever I can though!!!!

~~~~~~~

Prompt Post! Lizzy x Doll; "Stay with me forever"/"Because I love you!" N x V; "I thought you didn't want me"/"Why haven't you kissed me yet?" V x Thad; "I'm in love with you" V x Thad "I missed you so much"/"I can't stay away from you" N x Thad; "Can I kiss you?" N x Thad; "I want you. Only you." V x Thad; "I thought you didn't want me." Sam x Uzi; "The way I feel with you"/"I can't stay away from you." Uzi x Thad; "Please don't leave me"/"I'll always love you" N x Thad; "Please marry me"/"Why haven't you kissed me yet?" N x Uzi; "You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen"/"I'm better when I'm with you" J x Thad; "Please don't leave me"/"I'm better when I'm with you." <- You are here!

[apollodeath]

I want to make my own hc for König so here goes my attempt!

(Also there is some inspired by the millions I’ve read but some are purely from my mind lol)

My own König Headcannons!

(SFW)

He loves petting your hair whenever he can.

The bracelet he wears is a matching one to yours. Bought as a pair somewhere and you mailed it to him while he was away.

He never takes it off. Ever.

He loves getting home to see you, of course, but also just loves taking off his shoes and wearing pjs.

He definitely loves holding things up in the air away from your reach just to tease you. It makes him feel even bigger.

When you are sad he loves picking you up baby style and just holding you on his lap or in bed

Nights when he can’t sleep he whispers to you even tho you both live alone; he says he talks quietly because the stars are sleeping.

Usually falling asleep halfway through a sentence

Loves hugs, will without a doubt ask for one right when you wake up.

Hates coffee, makes him jittery

Maus is FOR SURE his petname for you. 

Doesn’t see a reason for a phone. Has one but barely knows how to use it.

Loves seeing you in his oversized shirts

He really likes when people are intimidated by him (unless he wants to be their friend.)

Gets tears in his eyes when he sees ASPCA commercials with the sad animals.

He saves every letter you send him under his pillow, he swears it smells like you and helps him have better dreams

He shaves his face rarely cause only stubble grows slowly for him

He minds his scars

He’s insecure about his scars that litter is body but he can’t help but blush when you trace them or kiss them

He treasures a moment in his mind when he tried hiding his scars with clothes or his mask but you said “let me see your pretty face, Köni~ ?” He said why he didn’t want you to see but that just made you say “I understand if you don’t want to now I’ll wait for when you are ready.” It made him smile and more comfortable with showing you slowly

He thinks it’s so cute and romantic when you tie his shoes so he returns the favor

He loves brushing your hair after showers/baths

Loves taking baths. Especially with you.

MDNI

DO NOT READ BELOW THIS LINE IF YOU DON’T WANT NSFW CONTENT

(NSFW)

Loves baths when they end with you on top and water on the bathroom floor from…. Splashing.

He’s guilty of leaving bruises on your hips on purpose because he just loves seeing them.

He also loves when you leave marks on his neck and chest just before he goes on missions

I feel like he has a super high sex drive and masturbates whenever he’s away or thinks you’re busy or you’re sleeping

If he’s away and catches a glimpse of his hickies on his chest or neck while getting ready he can’t help but get hard and have to finish himself to the thought of you leaving them on his body.

He moans quiet at first touches but, once he’s in the middle of pumping in you he’s cussing in his own language because honestly he forgets English when he’s in so much pleasure.

“Bitte kleine Maus, du fühlst dich so gut Scheiße”

Translation: Please, Little mouse you feel so good fuck!

He doesn’t do it often but, when he aches for only your touch not his own he will ask you even if you’re in the middle of your chores/busy. If you make him wait he’ll sit back getting more and more frustrated. His hard on will stay prominent and his hands will be pinned at his sides as he watches like a hungry animal ready for its pray to take a step closer. At times you get done and think about doing something else just to watch him shift in his seat and sigh.

But once you’re free and give him the look or a simple “König~” in your bedroom voice he’s up and pinning you to any surface ripping his own clothes down to his ankles and yours off and thrown to the side

After moments like that he usually apologizes with words sprinkled in kisses and cuddles

If he orgasms before you he will continue thrusting his seed in you

HE HAS A BREEDING KINK

He gets off on how he can throw you around and hold you to a wall while thrusting in so deeply

He knows you like when he holds both your wrists in his hand

He also enjoys being dominated. If you wanna tell him to get on his knees or that you wanna try something he’s in for it.

He loves watching you please yourself, no matter how it’s done.

Once you rubbed yourself against his thigh until your release and he had so much precum leaking it puddled in his pants. He bites his knuckle trying to stop his moans watching you.

He’s masturbated to you in his bunk while away… and other places like the bathroom, shower, outside under the stars on a mission etc.

He sometimes keeps all his gear on to fuck you in. He likes when you grab at his chest for stability and hold his tac vest. Must admit you like when the rough fabric rubs against your legs

His gloves on your body while he stares at you through his mask

He trains still at home by doing his workouts and going on runs just to keep up his health but he especially loves when you admire him sweaty and breathing heavy.

He knows what you’re thinking when your eyes travel up and down his body after a shower.

He keeps his mask on and only that when laying you out

He gives head for hours until his jaw feels sore just to taste you on his tongue and lips

When you finish he asks if he can make you cum again and again

He’s very jealous type but doenst let it get to him unless the person starts flirting or touches you.

Thank you for reading!

If there’s any typos I’m so sorry and I haven’t written anything like this ever soooo again sorry if it’s different or weird to read 😅

Also let me know if you want more I actually really liked this.

[leah-lover]

Meeting again. Alexia x reader part 3.

Reader is confronted by her friends.

Saying that tension was in the air would be an understatement. After the hellos, hugs and kisses the whole team went back to the changing room and took Leila with them. So there I was standing in front of Alexia, mapi, ingrid, parti, claudia, and aitana.

The silence was loud and their glares were unforgiving. All i thought to myself was that i didn't belong in barca anymore, i was cursing myself for ever choosing to leave city before Ingrid said “ We cant talk about this here how about we go to a restaurant and have a proper conversation.”

The rest of the girls seemed to agree with her, then Parti jumped and said “ okay then we will meet at our usual spot in about an hour, you still remembered no ?” she asked me with a sarcastic tone.

Confused, I only nodded and waited for them to all get inside before I breathed again. This encounter was harsh but I had a feeling it wasnt gonna get any easier.

After an hour I found myself at a table in my favorite restaurant with feelings I buried three years ago. All the anger, shame, and sadness came back with it. I waited a little before they all came together except alexia who was running late.

“ So how do you want to start this? Maybe with an apology for what you have done.” started Patri as soon as she sat down, which earned her a jab from Claudia who told her to be nicer.

“ i don't know what had gotten into you these past three years Patri but i don't this i have anything to apologies about.'' I replied with a defensive tone.

“ yes you do carino. You let us, no goodby no nothing we had to learn the news from instagram like everybody but we are not everybody we are your family and we felt hurt. Plus you didn't talk to us for 3 years. You denied every try at contacting you. You abandoned us you……” said mapi softly so as to not sound angry because she wasn't. They all went angry; they were just hurt.

“ Look, we don't have to do this. I came here to do my job and play good fucking football. I did this for my career not to rip my insides out again.'' I replied, trying to hold back my tears.

“ Darling, we are not trying to hurt you, we are trying to understand you. We are just curious why our best friend left us. ” explained ingrid with a concerned look on her face.

“ there is nothing to understand that your bestfriend is dead. She died three years ago. I have been a walking corpse since I left. I don't feel anything i am numb to everything.'' I managed to get out before a few tears left my eyes.

I then got up and went out. I was overwhelmed and all the feeling came back rushing. Which led me to hyperventilate. Suddenly I felt a hand on my back.

“ I am sorry about our reaction. We didn't know this would happen. We acted out of love for you. We missed you. We just are so very sorry just come back inside.” said aitana before pulling me into a hug.

I then started crying, all the tears i have been holding back decided to go out all at once.

“ i love her tan, i still do, i abandoned her, i gave up on her i didn't fight for her.'' I said while crying into tana’s shoulder.

“ I know darling, I know. She loves you too. She has been suffering without you we all have. Now just come back inside please.” she added running her hand through my back.

“ i dont think it's a good idea, I just want to go home now.” I said after we separated.

“ okay. Call me when you are ready to talk, okay.” she added before going back in.

When I got home Leila was already there. So as soon as I saw her on the couch I went straight to her and laid on her chest.

“ How did it go?” she said, running her hand through my hair.

“ fucking horrible.” I answered.

“ Do you want some ice cream?” she asked. “ I will get you some ice cream.” she answered herself after looking at me.

When Leila was gone the doorbell rang so i went to answer it.

And there she was in front of me, beautiful as ever. “ I know you want space but we need to talk.” she said and I ushered her in.

“ I miss you and I want you back.” she started after sitting on the couch. “ I know I was shitty to you, you didn't deserve what I put you through. I changed carino. You motivate me to get my priorities straight. You are my number 1 priority. You matter more than football more than le and more than life itself. Please give me a chance again. Please mi amor.”

Her words left me speechless. I was too tired to start over. I just want to be comforted and loved.

[mentally-gone002]

is it too early to love you? - part 6

(moodboard made by moi)

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7

summary: readers mom is told about her breakup with james by spencer. he made the mistake of thinking she already knew, but it ended in reader getting annoyed, and later angrier than she was before. 

warnings: our babies kinda fight so angsttttt

a/n: HEHEHAHFIDBIDBEKFBEID i needed to prolong it because this was originally gonna be the last part but the voices were like “NO WE DONT WANT IT TO END” so here we areeee😋😋😋 ily guys sm btw thanks for all the support on this series!!!! ENJOY GANG!!!

————————————————————————

i’ve been confused.

ever since spencer told me the reason for the kiss in his hotel room i’ve been reflecting. mostly on my feelings, which sounds like a load of bullshit but it has to be done. 

‘is it too early to love you?’ 

i didn’t know the answer to the question i’d asked until i found out that it was my best friend the whole time instead of the guy i was with for three years. and that shocked me.

i don’t know what to do about that. 

i wasn’t about to let it influence my ability to work. 

“thanks penelope.” i reached for the door handle of her lair after asking her to research something for a case i was finishing the paperwork for. 

she spun in her chair, smiling brightly. “of course! i love your visits mon ami.” 

i smiled back to her and quickly walked the hall back to the bullpen. 

upon my quick arrival through the large glass doors i was surprised to see my mom talking with spencer at my desk. i was expecting her to come by but not until five. 

my eyes went to the clock and i read that it was ten after five. i must’ve spent more time with penelope than i’d thought. 

“hi, mom.” i walked to my desk and set down the file in my hands. my eyes went to spencer’s briefly before i hugged her. “sorry i kept you waiting. i had to get some information on something.” i apologized. 

she patted my back. “it’s alright, your work is important.” she said in understanding. i pulled away and smiled at her. “why didn’t you tell me you broke up with james?” 

i looked at spencer, with wide eyes. “uhm,” i looked back at my mom. “can we talk about this later?” i asked, reaching blindly into my bag for my car keys. she nodded and pursed her lips. “i’ll meet you in the lobby, i need to give something to my boss.” i told her. 

she nodded. “okay. i’ll see you down there.” 

i watched her leave the bullpen, waiting for the glass doors to close all the way before i was looking up at spencer. “why did you tell her james and i broke up?” 

he looked shocked. “i- she asked about you two because she hadn’t heard about him in a while and was wondering why.” he replied. “i’m sorry.” 

i shook my head and gathered my things and started walking. i spun around to look back at spencer. “don’t go around telling people things that isn’t any of your business.” with that i turned and kept walking, faster now because of the annoyance bubbling under my skin. 

why would he do that?

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

“why did you break up with james?” my mom asked over dinner. 

i knew it was coming, i just didn’t realize she would ask as i’m in the middle of swallowing my drink. i coughed slightly and looked away, humming like i had to think about it. “he’s the one who broke up with me.” i told her. 

she frowned. “why? what happened?” 

i shrugged. “he just… got tired of me. he said he couldn’t deal with my job, or me as a whole.” i sifted my fork through the food on my plate. “we broke up like two months ago.”

“why didn’t you tell me?” my mom reached a hand across the small table to touch my hand. 

i gave her a look. “because i knew you’d call him and tell him to change his mind.” she bit the inside of her cheek. “he wouldn’t have anyway.” my eyes rolled slightly. 

she made a sad humming sound. “are you doing okay?” 

i nodded. “yeah, i mean he was kind of a dick because he broke almost all of my dishes, ripped up a bunch of my books and stole my tv after he’d broken up with me, but other than that, i’ve been doing good.” i gave her a tight lipped smile. “i got everything replaced so don’t worry.” i added before she got that sad look back on her face. 

“how come spencer knew about this before i did?” 

i dropped my fork and pressed my fingers into my eyes. “because he confronted me and then correctly guessed what was going on.” my lie was believable because he’d done this type of thing before, and i’ve told her about how strange it was that he could figure me out so fast. 

my mom took a sip of wine. “and then you just forgot to tell me?”

“what? no. i just… kept putting it off. i just didn’t- i don’t want to think about it.” my fingers scratched at the spot in front of my ear. “can we talk about something else, please?” 

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

after i’d gotten home from dinner i was calling spencer. he picked up as i was locking my deadbolt and i didn’t give him a chance to greet me before i was saying, “i just sat through the most uncomfortable dinner that i’ve ever had with my mom because of you.” 

spencer sputtered over the line. “because of me?” 

“yes, because of you. you and your big mouth that told my mom my business.” i paced back and forth behind my couch, one arm wrapped around my middle. 

“this wouldn’t have happened if you would’ve just told her sooner.” spencer retorted. 

i scoffed. “oh, so this is my fault now? what a mature way to handle this.” 

“this is all immature, not mature.” 

“i was being sarcastic.” i rolled my eyes in annoyance. 

“we’re both being immature.” he said. 

i shook my head while staring at the floor. “i just wish you wouldn’t have told her.”

“i thought she already knew.”

i looked up and walked back to my room. “yeah well, she didn’t.” i put the phone on speaker as i started to get undressed. 

spencer hummed. “no kidding.” he scoffed and i could almost hear him rolling his eyes. “i already apologized for this anyway, why are you calling me?” 

i pulled a tank top over my head. “i don’t know, honestly.” i picked up my phone again and pressed it to my ear. 

“how do you not know?” 

“i just don’t, okay?” i raised my voice. “sorry.” i sighed, sitting down heavily on my bed. “i just needed to hear you voice.” 

“and the best way to hear my voice was to start arguing with me?” he wondered. 

i nodded. “i just needed to vent, i didn’t want it to turn into an argument.” my eyes watched as my feet slid over the carpet. “i’m sorry.” 

spencer was quiet for a moment. “it’s okay.” he replied. “how’d your mom react to everything?” 

i scoffed a bit. “oh, you mean what did she say about him vandalizing my place?” 

“yes, that.” spencer laughed. 

i smiled at the sound of his voice. i didn’t like to fight with him. that was our first argument and i hated it. “she… didn’t say anything, believe it or not.” i laid on my back. “she did ask me why you were the first one to know.” 

he hummed. “what did you tell her?”

“i told her you just figured it out on your own.” i answered. “she believed me.”

“good. now she won’t have to cope with the fact that you love me more than her.” 

i laughed softly. “know your place reid, i love my mom. you’re second on that list.” i bit my lip, waiting for him to reply. 

“what about your sister?” he quizzed. 

i sighed. “you’re a close second.” 

“just a close second?” he inquired cheekily. 

i smiled to myself. “fine, you can share the podium.” i bargained. 

“i can work with that.” he agreed after taking a few seconds to reply. i could hear the smile on his lips and the way it infected his words. 

i smiled. he was contagious. perfectly contagious. “i’m… i’m gonna go.” i said it hesitantly. i didn’t want to go but i had things to do. not sure what they are yet but i’d find something. 

“okay.” spencer’s voice was softer now. a little quiet and disappointed. “i’ll see you tomorrow?”

“tomorrows saturday.” i reminded him. 

“right.” spencer murmured. “i’ll see you monday then.” 

i hummed in agreement. “see you monday.” 

“okay. bye.”

“bye, spencer.” 

when the line beeped to signal the end of the call i sighed with my eyes closed. why did it have to be saturday?

i called spencer again. 

“it hasn’t even been thirty seconds-“

“do you wanna do something tomorrow? like… play chess in the park or something?” 

spencer stumbled over a reply. “y- yeah. i’d like that.” i smiled widely and sat up. “what time?” 

“maybe noon? we could get coffee and then go to the park.”

“that sounds perfect.” he was breathy but loud enough so that i could hear him. 

“okay.” i bit my lip. “i’ll see you tomorrow.”

“yeah, see you tomorrow.”

“okay. bye… for real this time.”

spencer laughed. “for real this time.”

i smiled at his repetition and hung up. 

[gummygowon]

forest green | choi san

word count: 1k

request: forest green + angst (pls with happy ending i cant take sadness 😥💔)/opposites attract + san <3 !! thank u !

warnings: a few losers being mean to sannie

a/n: hi love thank you so much for requesting i'm so sorry this im posting this so late but i really had sm fun with this one i hope you enjoy!

"no shot y/n." your best friend soojin whispers to you as you guys walk out onto the court before the game starts.

"what?" you whisper back, trying to keep the cheerful smile on your face as you wave your forest green pom poms in the air at the crowd.

"you like choi san don't you?"

"what?" you pause, whipping your head to look at soojin.

"be so for real y/n, i can see you looking for his nerdy ass in the crowd right now."

"i am not!" you argue, turning your back to the crowd as the basketball team makes their way onto the court.

"y/n, you have the entire school at your finger tips and you choose choi san? nerdy ass choi san who spends his time in the library every friday night."

"and? i don't mind." you sheepishly answer staring down at your poms as san's cute dimple smile infiltrated your mind.

"my god, y/n, you have the kim mingyu wrapped around your finger and you want san?!?"

"at least san has a brain and isn't a jerk."

"so? he's hot that basically covers everything." soojin defends as you guys walk to the sidelines.

"for you it does." you huff, smoothing out your skirt as you get in your spot that was on the corner of the court. it gave you the perfect view of san who was wearing a forest green sweater to represent your school's colors. he was sitting at the very top of the bleachers looking lost as soon as the game started. a small smile appeared on your face as watch san's eyebrows furrow in confusion trying to understand what was happening in front of him. eventually, his eyes trailed down to the cheerleader section where you were. you caught his gaze and gave him a small wave which he returned with a shy smile.

the crowd erupts in cheers as hongjoong scores the first basket of the game meaning your little moment with san was rudely ended. the game however goes on well as your team absolutely destroys your opponent. cheers erupted the gym as the students shouted in celebration. as one of the cheer leaders you follow your team to the court to make a tunnel for the team as they head back to the locker room.

once they leave, your coach gives out her post game speech and then lets you guys go. to your surprise, you see san waiting outside the gym trying to make himself look busy.

"hey," you softly say bumping his shoulder with yours causing him to jump. "do you need help finding the exit or?"

"no," san scoffs bumping his shoulder into you as revenge, "just thought i should say you did great out there."

a shy smile makes its way to your face as your heart beats against your chest. "thank yo-"

"y/n!" mingyu emerges from god knows where, throwing his arm over you forcing you and san to separate. "you comin' to my house later? my parents are gone and i'm throwing a huge party for tonight's win!"

"oh, i-" you peer over mingyu's large frame to see san looking dejectedly at the floor.

"you're going!" yuqi shouts from behind, another one of your teammates.

you didn't even get a chance to say goodbye as mingyu and his teammates along with yours push you to the parking lot.

"why are you even hanging out with san? isn't he a total loser?" someone asks from behind you.

"yeah, plus he's a total sqaure!"

"little man probably hasn't felt the touch of a woman since his mother changed his diaper!"

"excuse me?" you say utterly in shock that your so called friends are just outwardly saying shit about someone.

before anyone even had a chance to say anything san pushes his way through the crowd angrily.

"san, wait!" you say trying to catch up to him only to have mingyu tug at your wrist.

"leave him be y/n. kid's a loser anyways."

"he is not!" you argue, ripping your arm away from him. "just fuck off and go have your stupid party!"

you made a beeline to your car and drove to the one place you knew san would be at a time like this. the park where the playground was a mix of ugly beige and forest green and where the park overlooked your little hometown. san liked it because it made him like he was on top of the world even if he was treated like shit.

thankfully, san's beat up toyota corolla was parked in front of the playground.

"thought i might find you here." you say in a quiet tone, wrapping your hands around self because of course you forgot your lettermen at home.

san didn't even turn to look at you as he swung slowly on the creaky swing set. "aren't you supposed to be at some party?"

"yeah, but i didn't feel like going." you answer sitting next to san on the other swing.

"so you decided to hang out with a loser on a good friday night?" he sarcastically asks.

"san-"

"why do you even wanna be around me? midterms are over so you don't have to be around me for awhile." san spits, still not even daring to look up at you. "you know, i thought that maybe there would be a chance you actually like me."

your heart cracked at every word that was coming out his mouth. "san, i do. a lot. trust me."

"no you don't." his knuckles turning white because of how hard he was gripping the chains on the swing. "not in the way i do."

still san was refusing to look up at you until you take a hand and place it softly on his cheek. san jumps at your sudden touch before slowly raising his eyes to meet yours.

"i like you sannie." you confess, heart racing a hundred miles per hour. "i don't care what people or even you say about yourself. i like the way your dimples pop out when you smile. i like the way you never get frustrated with him when you're teaching me. i like the way you remember the little things about everyone. i like you, choi san."

"i-are you sure?" he asks to stunned to even respond to your confession.

you nod your head, giggling at the way san was staring at you in shock.

"can i kiss you?"

"of course, sannie." you answer before smiling to the warm kiss.

[thepaperpanda]

A Morbid Jealousy || Low-honor Arthur Morgan x fem!reader

Summary: A successful robbery has led to the gang celebrating at the camp, but Arthur gets very nasty when he sees you dancing with John

Warnings: smut (unprotected p in v, low-honor Arthur)

Word count: 1442

Authors: Cass & Rouge

Everyone in the gang just sat together and had fun like one big family during this rare moment. A small bank was robbed successfully. Except for Arthur, everyone returned intact with bags full of money.

You were told by Charles that he had decided to return to camp alone. Arthur probably wandered around the town and got into trouble; that's what he does.

As you listened to Javier's guitar and the gang's happy voices singing a song, you had a still full bottle in your hand.

Your look of unhappiness caught John's attention. He patted your shoulder and said, "Hey." You were offered a hand by him. "Wanna dance? I can't dance, but seeing you sad like that is annoying."

Getting up and drinking your beer, you were glad someone was trying to cheer you up. Your arm wrapped around his neck as you rocked along with the rhythm of the music. You chuckled, "Abigail would be jealous."

John wrapped his arm around your waist. "Don't worry about her. I'll deal with her on my own," he spun you around.  Even though John didn't know how to dance, watching Dutch many times helped. "The only thing I want to do is cheer my friend up." he offered you a bright grin.

Taking a moment to let the rhythm control you, you whispered, "You're sweet." and kissed his cheek briefly. While nuzzling his neck, you giggled, saying, "You're a good dancer."

John shrugged and held you tightly as he laughed, "Me? No, I just watch old Dutch dancing all the time."

It was the worst time you could have chosen to dance with John - Arthur returned to camp just now; he hitched his horse and went to the campfire. The moment he saw you and John so close, he stopped in shock. A loud roar from Arthur brought everyone's attention to the direction he was pointing. "What the fuck?"

As you pushed away from John, you whispered, "Arthur..." Your face flushed with confusion as you noticed your boyfriend's consternation; you knew how jealous he could be.

Both of you were approached by him. 

Arture growled at you loudly and grabbed your arm tightly as he turned to John. "I know you are so desperate for every little touch, rabbit, but you could make some fucking standards." Arthur turned to Johna and added briefly, "Martson, you should be fucking happy you have a child, or I would kill you right here and now for even talking to her,"  Arthur said and dragged you away from everyone.

While Morgan dragged you away from the crew, you whispered, "John," as you wanted to apologize to him for Arthur's behavior. Your arm soon slipped from Arthur's strong grasp. "Arthur, you didn't have to be that mean to John. He did nothing wrong."

"He touched you," Morgan growled. "Undress," Arthur ordered as he closed your tent's flaps.

"Yes, because we were dancing!" You reminded him and cocked your brow at his order. "Why?"

Arthur yelled, "Undress, or I'll rip your clothes off myself! I don't care what you two were doing. You are mine!"

Unbuttoning your dress, you shook your head. You said firmly, "You overreacted, Morgan," as you let the dress fall to the floor. "Happy?"

As he put away the gun belt, he said, "On your knees."

Slowly getting down on your knees, your eyes on his face, you shivered but obeyed. He was clearly pissed off, so you decided not to argue with him anymore.

I'm so surprised you're so quiet. Suddenly, you are not defending John," he smiled. "You are in the right place now, rabbit," Arthur purred and ran his hand down your hand before grabbing it tightly. "You are mine and only mine. Do you understand?"

Liking your lips, you nodded eagerly. "I belong only to you, Mr Morgan," you agreed, closing your eyes for a while.

He quickly opened his pants and purred, "Now this is a good answer. You've got to show me how sorry you are."

As you looked at his face, you reached into his slightly worn jeans and pulled his half-erected cock out; you spat on its tip and pumped your hand over its shaft.

In his low grunt of approval, Arthur watched you like a hawk; he let go of your hair for now and placed his hand on your nape.

Trying to suck his dick at the same time, you bobbed your head back and forth and used your palm to pump over his cock. Your hand squeezed his shaft as you sucked on his balls.

Arthur purred, "That's right, girl. For once, you behave like you should."

You were suddenly picked up by him; he flipped you over to your stomach and put you on the cot. 

"Was touching that bag of bones even worth it, rabbit?" Arthur growled at you.

Apparently he was hot for you; you blinked and blushed as he pushed you onto the bed. Your butt was raised a bit and you shook it for him. "Fuck me," you begged.

He roared, "I asked you something!" You felt Arthur squeeze your throat.

"It wasn't," you whispered.

"Louder! I can't hear you!"

You growled loudly, slipping your hand beneath you so you could slip your finger into your aching pussy. "It wasn't!"

He sighed, getting up from his cot to search for his bag. "You really love to annoy me, woman. How can I even put up with you."

Arthur pulled out his rope and returned to you; he took both of your hands and tied them behind your back. "It might teach you how to behave," Arthur said proudly as he moved his hand along your spine as his free hand tugged his jeans fully off.

When he was doing things like this, you always shivered, but eventually, it turned you on even more; you simply loved to be mercilessly manhandled.

While his tip moved through your pussy lips, Arthur teased, "You got a problem with moving, darlin'?" He hummed and slammed into you, pushing as hard as he could. "Ain't so brave anymore, huh? You are always so smart until I get you into my hands.

You screamed, "Oh, God!" When pleasure hit you hard, you rolled your eyes and begged, "Untie me, Arthur! I need to touch you!" 

His member was immediately squeezed by your walls.

"Nah, I don't think so," he smiled and thrust deep into you.

His thrusts became deep and hard. "You won't play around with fucking Marston," Arthur growled the last part lowly.

Let out a long moan as you stick your bun up to him. You cried out through parted lips, "I love it when you fuck me well."

"Moan, I want everyone to know who you belong to, and I want that bag of bones to know how well I fucked you," Morgan whispered into your ear after leaning forward to you.

"I'll scream your name if you untie me!" You begged. His thrusts made you feel slick and wet, along with your juice pouring down your thighs.

Grabbing your hair, Arthur lifted your head. "Now, you ain't the one to make the conditions, so you better scream without any stupid ideas or I will fill you up with my cum and leave you here, all tied up for everyone to see."

You screamed, "Arthur! Oh, just fuck me, honey! Just like that!" You rolled your hips for him to meet his thrusts. "I belong to Arthur Morgan!"

After those words, he started moving fast and hard, trying to make you cum hard around his thick cock. "Now you're a good girl," Arthur purred, biting your neck. Choosing such a place, he knew you would have difficulty hiding it.

As soon as he bit into your neck, your walls tightened around his member so strongly that he was unable to back away. You dripped juices down your legs when you cum hard around him. "Fuck," you trembled.

"Such a good girl, I'm gonna enjoy watching you walk funny tomorrow, darlin'," Arthur whispered into your ear and filled you with his cum.

As your vision blurred, you moaned and waited for him to untie you.

Arthur let out a happy sigh and got up. Putting on his clothes, he said, "That was fun. What do ya think, darling?"

You smirked at him and asked, "Untie me. And it was fucking brilliant. You were amazing."

"I know I was," he giggled and tucked his gun belt into his waistband. The tent flaps were raised by Artur without a word, and he left to join the still-going party, leaving you tied up on his cot.

[justanotherarmyfangirl]

In Heat! 2/7

They're in heat, and you smell so hot...

Warning: 18+ smut, dubcon/noncon, hybrid!bts, dog-hybrid!namjoon x human!reader, dark yandere, mind break, manipulation, big/tiny, noona, biting, alpha

Namjoon roamed the night alone. A stray dog. You had taken him in.

Back then he looked so weak and pitiful, you had felt such immense sadness looking at him, you let him into your home in your blind kindness. You showed him love for the first time, a warm room to stay, fresh food to eat, and he appreciated you, loved you.

You had suspected he was a hybrid long before he showed himself, and you still accepted him for who he was when he felt safe enough to shift, you loved him too, as a friend, as a companion. He was smart and funny and cute. A sweet doggy who cured your loneliness and accepted your doting with a dimpled smile.

He was no longer a forlorn puppy, he was bigger, stronger, tougher than you in every way, an alpha. Yet you did not have any reason to fear him, the way his large body would curl around yours as he whined for pets.

You scratched behind his ears, smiling as your watched a movie together. You hadn't expected or prepared for when his wild insticts finally took over. This night, when his face nuzzled into your lap, he groaned and his grip on you became tighter. You were approaching your most fertile days and he was approaching his rut, and all he could think about, dream about, was your tight cunt filled with his seed and his name on your lips spoken in the most obscene way.

You tried to wiggle out of his uncomfortable hold and when he protested, you were more forceful, chastising his demeanor, not knowing your place in your relationship now, not understanding how things really were.

"Joon, hello?! Let me go, why are you being so bad?" His ears fell flat and his eyes turned dark and he pinned you down. You laughed at first, used to his playfulness when he innocently scented you, but yelped out when he brought his mouth down to your neck, licking and sucking and hurting you with his love bites. "N-No, Joon, n-not like that."

You questioned him, pushing against his heavy frame above you, unable to make him move. "You smell so good," he whimpers. "Noona, please, don't refuse me," he grunts into your ear, his deep voice making you shiver.

"Let me go, now!" you try to command him, but Namjoon doesn't shy away, not now, not anymore.

He growls at you for the first time. "I'm going to fuck you full of me, you'll understand why...you'll understand...be a good girl," he repeats the phrase you've said to him countless times, 'good boy,' instead now to get you to comply. "My good girl," he purrs, caressing your hair, settling his body down between your legs.

You cry out, lost on how to stop this spiraling situation. "Joon, w-we can't, as your guardian I-"

"No!" he growls, "No, you're my mate. I'm yours, and you're mine."

"Your m-mate?"

You tried to reason with Namjoon as his grip grew tighter, as he pressed his clothed erection down and rutted into your heat, that hybrids and humans shouldn't do these things, that you'll find someone to take care of his needs, that he can't, it's wrong, please don't do this Joonie, please, it hurts, I don't want to, you're hurting me! No...stop...no!

His stubble scratched your skin, his teeth tore at your lips, he was too rough from years of pent up frustration. "I love you. Your body, f-fuck, it's so soft, so perfect. I fucking love you. You're mine, you're mine. Don't refuse me, ever, okay?"

Namjoon's love was painful. He loved you too much, wanted you so much he couldn't contain himself, needed to feel you so much it hurt him not to act, and it really hurt you.

He whispers soft sorrys into your ear even after he ripped your clothes away and shoved himself inside you. He licked away your tears and nuzzled into your neck whispering all the things he found beautiful in you even as he thrusted into you so deep you felt like you were splitting in two. Your sweet boy was still there even amidst his brutal pace. It made you dizzy and confused, unable to catch a full breath without breathing Namjoon in. You felt overwhelmed, becoming hotter and hotter, so much pain and so much desire, your body didn't know how to react to it.

His strong hands kneaded your breasts and his tongue licked into your mouth and across your lips as his thick cock ripped you open, filled you, hit your most sensitive parts over and over again until your head spun and your cries turned into whimpering moans.

And then you finally whined out everything he longed to hear. Namjoon admired your tear-streaked face and wild hair, your swollen moist lips and glazed sparkling eyes, and fucked into you harder to hear it again.

"Oh-Namjoon."

Like this series so far? A yay or a nay? I don't really know how to write hybrid or a/b/o but I'm trying! KNJ | KSJ | MYG | JHS | PJM | KTH | JJK | BTS

[railingsofsorrow]

summary: you're being neglected by your-so-called-friends and james is there like he always is. 

warnings: self-deprecation; self-isolating; descriptions of being left aside; talk about not feeling enough.

A/N: just words I needed to hear + poor writing (have you caught on that I'm in my james potter phase?) I also wanted to say that if any of you feel like that, you're amazing and you make a difference. don't let people diminish your value. you're loved and you matter. 

w.c: 1.3K

pairing: james potter x gn!reader

navi

masterpost

✧༺༻∞

“you're quiet today,” james plots down on the couch by your side, the leather screeches as he leans closer to you just enough to respect your personal space. 

“I am quiet,” you answer, still with your attention stuck to the parchment. you were finishing an assignment due next week. it's not like you had anything else better to do. 

with a tilt of his head, he tries to peak over your shoulder, smiling softly as he caught a glimpse of your neat handwriting. he loved watching you do anything at all. it was therapeutic.

“you're more quiet than usual then,” james gives you a gentle smile. you had finally offered him your attention. “I didn't see you at lunch or at dinner.”

“I wasn't hungry.”

“I saw you in the kitchens, eating with the elves.”

your glare didn't refrain him from pushing.

“you're isolating yourself,” james says carefully. “why? did something happen?”

you survey his face, from the mole on the middle of his neck to his dirty glasses’ lenses. letting out a sigh, you pull them away from his face, minding the temples on his eyes. 

james doesn't even flinch.

“I'm frustrated, that's all.” you said lowly, muttering a spell to clean off the blurred frames. 

you place them back on his face, aware you were under his awed gaze. 

“d'you want to talk about it?” he whispered after a while, slightly blushing that he'd been staring.

you shrug, going back to your homework. 

james sighs, frustrated himself that he didn't have your full attention. that parchment was snatching all of it.

“did someone upset you? who do I need to hex?” 

you let a giggle escape and his eyes soften. there you are.

“at least six people. are you up for it?” james raises an eyebrow and nods. you rest your quill down, pursuing your lips. “have you ever felt left out?”

james blinks at the sudden question. but taking a deeper look on your eyes and their red rimmed outline he was starting to figure you out a little. the issue must be the group you called friends.

“I have,” he admits, crossing his legs, knees bumping with yours. “when I was little. before coming to hogwarts.”

“what was it like?” you ask quietly but curious. you couldn't imagine james potter of all people feeling left out. he was the boy people looked at and thought I want to be with him or I want to be him. there was no in-between. 

he fiddled with a ripped fabric in a spot on the couch, “it was hard for me to... make friends. my parents kept saying that I should just be myself but that didn't help me at all,” he let out a half-hearted laugh at the memory. “I was lonely, most of the time. before pete moved in next to me. then I felt for the first time that I didn't have to try to be someone I wasn't.”

“do they make you feel heard?” you refer to his real friends, now.

james casts you a look of understanding, “yes, they do. and they care. do you feel like that?” he knew you didn't. it hasn't been your first time with this kind of sadness on your features.

did you feel heard? seen? did your friends at least spared you their attention during conversations?

you pause.

“no.” you admit, ashamed. because now you could see. this wasn't how friends were supposed to treat you. talking over you, skipping your input as if it was nothing. forgetting you completely. just appearing when they need something. like the assignment you were finishing. one of them asked to take a look at it afterwards. let me know when you're done. 

that's all you're remembered for.

“I think people just put up with me. at first, everything is perfect and they even pretend to listen to what I say but then... I don't know what happens, or what I do — if I knew I'd change it, believe me — but they either leave or just stop noticing I'm there, you know?”

you only realize you had spoken it out loud when james is taking your hand and bringing to his cheek. he does it whenever he feels you slipping away or when he wants you to look directly at him. you do. and he has conflicting emotions dancing in his amber orbs. a fire-like anger grazed with a lot of concern. 

you feel like you could tell james anything. any time. he made you feel important. special, even. but sometimes, you think, maybe you should just stay quiet. 

you speak too much. you overshare. you're annoying. everyone thinks you're boring and that's why you shouldn't speak up. you interrupt the smooth flow in a conversation. 

just stay quiet.

“I don't see how someone would just stop noticing you. how is it even possible? you're amazing.” james intertwines your fingers and rests your joined hands against his cheek. “there's absolutely nothing you say that is insignificant. the opposite, really,” he adds, scooting closer as if he was about to tell you his darkest secret. “listen to me now, alright?” he waits for your response and you nod confused. “I don't put up with you. your company is what I look for every day, I love hearing the sound of your voice, I love the way you change your tone when you're speaking about something you cherish. but most of all, I love that you're you. nothing to alter, nothing to leave out.” 

you blinked fast.

hearing the boy in front of you mend up a piece of your heart with those words was... not surprising at all. james had that kind of magic. he didn't need to say anything to make you feel better, just be there. but when he did use his words, it was like your favourite poetry penetrating your chest, brightening your cloudy day with a peak of sunlight. 

james potter really is the sun. 

“you mean it?” you prompt, still pathetically insecure. james, in all his patient-self, kisses your hand and then your cheek to prove a point. 

a smile cracks your sad façade. 

“you don't need people who don't realize your worth, they don't deserve you,” he says, frowning slightly. “besides, they treat you badly, I've seen it.”

“I just don't want to be alone.” you confess, looking down when you felt your throat close. “it's- it's stupid. but now I'm realizing being alone is better than being around them.” 

james shook his head, “you're not alone. never. am I wearing my invisibility cloak now? you can't see me?” he says playfully, pretending to check if his body was visible. you push him slightly and he grins up at you. 

“I'm here,” he says, squeezing your hand. “always.”

letting out a breath, you rest your forehead on his shoulder, “i know, james.” 

his lips waver at the top of your head, fingers working their way up your arm. “come to the match tomorrow.” he requests. 

you look up at him with crossed eyes because of your proximity, “gryffindor plays tomorrow?”

he flashes you a lopsided smile, bopping your nose, “yes. and when I fly through the stands I want to see you there. will I?”

you pretend to think it over and his grin drops. then you smile, kissing his cheek, “of course. I'll be there.” 

sames rolls his eyes, “okay. I hope you mean that.”

“what don't I do for you, james potter?” 

james threw all of his body weight on you, pulling you both towards the mattress with a huff. you squirmed, slapping his back, he didn't move, only laughed into your shoulder. 

his triumph over putting a smile on your face couldn't be masked. making you happy was all that james cared about, and he'd make sure to keep doing that for as long as he was around.

A/N: I wish I had a james potter to cheer me up :(((