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#Peter is 100% dead on to me
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What would each Marauder characters smell like in Amortentia:
James: Broom polish, cinnamon, fresh spring air, oranges (like a tangeriney smell) .
Sirius: Hairspray, Ash (the smell of a campfire), vanilla lip balm, basil.
Remus: Black coffee, a brand new book, caramel, whiskey.
Peter: Sunscreen, watermelon (but the artificial smell), mint (fresh, like you’re smelling the herb directly), fresh laundry.
Lily: The sea, strawberries (fresh not artificial), lavender, dewy grass.
Marlene: Broom Polish, cigarettes, rain, apples.
Dorcas: Coconut, Acrylic Paint, Cold Air (it has a fresh scent imo), Cherry Coke.
Mary: The Earl Grey Tea She Drinks, Chocolate Chip Cookies, Sweet Cream, Her Vanilla Purfume.
Regulus: Cold Water, Pine, Musk (it’s in his cologne), Expensive Ink.
Pandora: Seaweed, Limes, Rosemary, Soil.
Barty: Oil (don’t ask why), Cedar, Rain Water, Copper.
Evan: Sandalwood, Coffee (with milk), Coconut Conditioner, Grapefruit.
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ella-ashmore · 10 months
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finished what i was working on for the third prompt of lautski week (movie) !! they r having. a little sleepover :]
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hereissomething · 1 year
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so, uh,
good omens, season 2, last episode, last few minutes.
yep.
yeP.
YYYYEP.
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dolokhoded · 10 months
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there's something incredibly funny about the dynamic between me, fandomed your bible made them queers but has no actual extreme opinions about christianity because i think it's all made up and you can believe in whatever pleases you, and my best friend, somewhat orthodox (with a natural hatred for the church any actual christian should have), very lowkey and respectful towards everything, frowns at me when i slander the apostle john, but straight up believes with his whole chest paul was the antichrist and will argue with your 80 year old christian grandmother about it
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clvric · 2 years
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        ❝ I should have known I’d leave alone... Just goes to show that the            blood you bleed is just the blood you owe. ❞
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animusrox · 7 months
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TOP 10
Past Lives
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
How to Blow Up a Pipeline
Poor Things
Oppenheimer
Barbie
BlackBerry
The Holdovers
The Iron Claw
Killers of the Flower Moon
MY LETTERBOXD Grade A 11.    The Killer 12.    Beau Is Afraid 13.    Dream Scenario 14.    Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 15.    Godzilla Minus One 16.    American Fiction 17.    They Cloned Tyrone 18.     Evil Dead Rise 19.    Eileen 20.    The Artifice Girl 21.   Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem 22.    Talk to Me 23.    Reality 24.    Leave the World Behind 25.    A Thousand and One 26.    Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One 27.    Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. 28.    Theater Camp 29.   Carmen 30.    Merry Little Batman 31.    Priscilla 32.    Society of the Snow 33.    Infinity Pool 34.    Enys Men 35.    Sanctuary 36.    Rye Lane 37.    Skinamarink 38.    Monster 39.    Anatomy of a Fall 40.    Landscape with Invisible Hand 41.    Reptile 42.    Sisu 43.    Pinball: The Man Who Saved the Game 44.    No One Will Save You 45.    Tetris 46.    May December 47.    The Zone of Interest 48.    V/H/S/85 49.    Dumb Money 50.    El Conde 51.    Arnold 52.    Maestro 53.    Napoleon 54.    20 Days in Mariupol 55.    Influencer 56.    The Creator 57.    Origin 58.    Thanksgiving 59.    Next Goal Wins 60.    The Boy and the Heron 61.    Bottoms 62.    Wonka
[Press Keep Reading For The Full Graded List]
Grade B
63.   God Is a Bullet 64.    No Hard Feelings 65.    Joy Ride 66.    Fair Play 67.     Cocaine Bear 68.    NYAD 69.    Asteroid City 70.    Nowhere 71.    The Angry Black Girl and Her Monster 72.    Divinity 73.    The Equalizer 3 74.    The Last Voyage of the Demeter 75.    Venus 76.    Butcher’s Crossing 77.    Somewhere in Queens 78.    The Persian Version 79.    Boston Strangler 80.    Polite Society 81.    Miguel Wants to Fight 82.    The Color Purple 83.    The Royal Hotel 84.    Saw X 85.    All of Us Strangers 86.    Fallen Leaves 87.    Ferrari 88.    Elemental 89.    Peter Pan & Wendy 90.    Renfield 91.    Cat Person 92.    Scream VI 93.    The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes 94.    BS High 95.    Blue Beetle 96.    Huesera: The Bone Woman 97.    When Evil Lurks 98.    Dark Harvest 99.    A Good Person 100.    Final Cut 101.    Knock at the Cabin 102.    Quiz Lady 103.    Leo 104.    Air 105.    The Super Mario Bros. Movie 106.    Batman: The Doom That Came to Gotham 107.    John Wick: Chapter 4 108.    Beaten to Death 109.    The Wrath of Becky 110.    Passages 111.    Transformers: Rise of the Beasts 112.    Gran Turismo 113.    65 114.    Sick 115.    Sister Death 116.    The Blackening 117.    Please Don’t Destroy: The Treasure of Foggy Mountain 118.    Flamin’ Hot 119.    Nimona 120.    Cobweb 121.    Totally Killer 122.    What’s Love Got to Do with It? 123.     Sharper 124.    Unseen 125.    Dunki 126.    Bird Box Barcelona 127.    The Marvels 128.    Shazam! Fury of the Gods
Grade C
129.   Wildflower 130.    Freelance 131.    M3GAN 132.    Strays 133.    Sympathy for the Devil 134.    Creed III 135.    Chevalier 136.    The Marsh King’s Daughter 137.    A Haunting in Venice 138.    The Little Mermaid 139.    Silent Night 140.    Master Gardener 141.    The Flash 142.    Fast X 143.    The Pope’s Exorcist 144.    Saltburn 145.    Kandahar 146.    Stand 147.    Plane 148.   Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny 149.    Fingernails 150.    Quicksand 151.    Fool’s Paradise 152.    Migration 153.    Rustin 154.    The Covenant 155.    Good Burger 2 156.    The Pod Generation 157.  �� Alice, Darling 158.    Insidious: The Red Door 159.    Missing 160.    Shotgun Wedding 161.    You Hurt My Feelings 162.    The Boogeyman 163.    Showing Up 164.    Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom 165.    Champions 166.    Consecration 167.    The Nun II 168.    Biosphere 169.    House Party 170.    The Exorcist: Believer 171.    Big George Foreman 172.    Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves 173.    Children of the Corn 174.    The Beanie Bubble 175.    Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania
Grade F
176.    Anyone But You 177.    Marlowe 178.    Paint 179.    Extraction 2 180.    It Lives Inside 181.    Deliver Us 182.    Trolls Band Together 183.    Finestkind 184.    Corner Office 185.    Wish 186.    Prisoner’s Daughter 187.    Pain Hustlers 188.    Foe 189.    The Mother 190.    Old Dads 191.    Ghosted 192.    Ruby Gillman, Teenage Kraken 193.    Haunted Mansion 194.    Mafia Mamma 195.    Five Nights at Freddy’s 196.    The Machine 197.    Justice League: Warworld 198.    We Have a Ghost 199.    What Comes Around 200.    Legion of Super-Heroes 201.    The Boys in the Boat 202.    Attachment 203.    Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre 204.    About My Father 205.    You People 206.    Meg 2: The Trench 207.    Pathaan 208.    Rebel Moon - Part One: A Child of Fire 209.    Assassin 210.    Dalíland 211.    Vacation Friends 2
Bottom 10
212.    Sound of Freedom 213.    Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey 214.    When You Finish Saving The World 215.    Heart of Stone 216.    Family Switch 217.    Expend4bles 218.    Sweetwater 219.    Hypnotic 220.    80 for Brady 221.    Spinning Gold
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wakeup01 · 2 months
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buttslut
If you had asked Dante whether he would ever bottom, 1, he would probably punch you. And 2, he would insist that topping gays was just something 100% straight men like him did. And he’d say it with…well, with a ‘straight’ face. It was a display of superiority and power, an act to show people their place. He wouldn’t be seen dead bent over, presenting his rear. The mere idea disgusted him, a fact he made very clear when loudly talking to his recently made friend, Cris, inside the local inclusive night club.
An unlikely friendship that only came about from bumping into each other while Dante was taking selfies in the college bathrooms. Something of a regular past time, as Cris quickly learned. Even in a public place, Dante didn’t miss the opportunity to admire his own body, smirking as several gay guys around him turned to get a glimpse. Maybe that was the only real reason he agreed to come along. Then again, he was capable of being kindhearted, in his own special way.
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“You see those pathetic ‘guys’ earlier? Practically begging to be shown what a real man can do.” Dante commented, chugging down the rest of his beer. Blatantly ignoring the warning hanging on the wall which stated ‘discrimination will not be tolerated’. Yes. Kind. In his *own* special way. “You get me?”
“Uh huh...” Cris sheepishly replied, trying to hold back a wince. Looking down with disappointment, his eyes tearing up slightly. Now definitely wasn’t a good time to reveal that he was actually trans. Maybe when the sun was about to implode, yes, that seemed like a more appropriate occasion.
Dante was a somewhat typical douchebag jock in most respects, keen to display his dominance and superior body to anyone with a hole to fill. A fuckstick with a guy - rather inconveniently, attached. Dante pushed out his perfectly sculpted chest and flexed his rippling muscles while he made his openly deriding remarks as a group passed him by. Deliberately yelling over the obnoxious club song that was blaring overhead. Cris merely laughed nervously, ashamed to admit his infatuation with Dante’s body - adjusting his trousers as his dick unconsciously rose to attention at Dante’s confident voice.
“Christ, your drink looks kinda fruity. You should try some of mine.” He lifts a glass and holds it out.
“Maybe later, do you want to go dance? I kinda dig this Charli…song.” Cris’ voice peters out at the expression shot in their direction. “Maybe not, huh.”
Unfortunately for Dante, the patrons and staff weren’t too keen on his ‘colourful’ choice of words, especially when starting to talk about ‘butt sluts’, as he put it. A bit of glitter blown in his direction was all that was needed to kickstart a change in perspective. Cris watched with wide eyes as he witnessed his toxic crush’s language and demeanour gradually adjust in front of him.
Dante attempted to brush away the glitter that somwhow got all over him. “The fu—fudge is this gay shi—shizzle!” Instead he only managed to spread it everywhere, speeding up the adjustments. Dante took another sip of beer and scrunched his nose up at the taste, pushing the drink aside. His stiff and once proud stature grew limp, hips swaying to the rhythm of the club music. The plethora of swears and insults softened into a series of enthusiastic lisps and giggles. His deep voice changing pitch one word at a time. “This soOOoong s—slaps, like, a totes banger!” Dante shouts out, to his friends amusement.
“But I thought you hated this—“
“Uhhhh, as if!” Dante’s whiney intonation quickly interjects, somewhat unbefitting of the muscled body it came from, his defined pecs still pushing out against the thin fabric of his tank top.
A warm insatiable itch caused Dante to absently remove his top and shorts, revealing a jockstrap cupping his bubbly rear - which quickly doubled in mass as it comically splayed out beneath him. A result of the rainbow glitter sticking to his sweaty body. The rest of him remained built like a tank, wide shoulders and thick thighs. A meaty chest glistening under the flickering lights of the club. He was so hot, but not just in appearance. The drunken stupor had fully gripped his easily manipulated mind. Everything around him suddenly seemed soo funny.
“Gawd, my butt’s, like, pretty big. Weird. Heehee.” Dante points out, turning slightly to show Cris, causing his cheeks to wobble. “Do girls even want big butts on guys?”
“Well…I…” Cris stammers, blushing bright red at the image of his ultra masculine friend shaking his butt while effeminately biting his lip.
“Like suuuper big and…” Internally Dante was unaware of his out of character behaviour, unquestioning as his brutish dominance was purged, replaced by adorably bratty submissiveness. He was the same old Dante deep down, just…happier. And sluttier. His body unconsciously began to gyrate to the heavy bass throbbing in his head. All he noticed was the growing need centred around his tight hole. His fingers cautiously touched the jiggly mound of flesh weighing him down from behind. Dante’s eyes filled with lust as he stared at his friend Cris, noting the sight of him and all the other hot men around him. A pleasurable sigh escapes his pursed lips.
“Big and…empty.”
A couple minutes of character growth later, members of staff arrived to offer Dante ‘vip status’ at the club. A program they had setup to deal with any ‘troublemakers’. Dante didn’t mind however, and agreed instantly. Cris followed as he got directed out the back door towards his new station, taking his position as a public relief hole. Leaning against the wall as the cool night air brushed against his bare skin. All the while he was incapable of keeping his hands off his rear, feeling it up without a second thought as onlookers watched. Dante simply nodded along dimly while the club’s manager explained that he was about to be fucked and used repeatedly to atone for his remarks. That once he has filled his quota, he and his twerkable bubble butt would become the club’s next permanent dancer.
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Dante smiles and says “mmkay” while pushing his hands against the wall and widening his legs - staring blankly ahead. “Like this?” There was a little sign above his head that simply read ‘hole’ with an arrow pointing down. Just in case it wasn’t clear.
Cris made sure he was first in line to try out the new resident ‘butt slut’. He positions himself behind Dante, and struggles to hold back a laugh at the sight of the once bigoted jock willingly preparing to get dicked. He definitely liked him a lot more like this - the same muscled physique, but without the crude superiority complex. Their friendship was sure to hit new heights.
“Ready? Let me show you what a ‘real man’ can do.” Cris says with a newfound sense of confidence. Playfully, he spins Dante’s baseball cap around and places his hands across the himbo’s rear, parting his huge round cheeks to show off the cherry he was about to pop - before the rest of the club would inevitably leave him gaping.
“Mm.” Is all Dante can muster before Cris’s cock forcefully stretches him open and leaves him moaning like the natural cock hungry bottom he now was. “Don’t—don’t stawwwp babe!”
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igotanidea · 8 months
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Personal rhythm: Jason Todd x reader
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Summary/request: Jason finding out that you've never slow danced before, and he goes out of his way to arrange a dance for just the two of you alone.
thank you @miraculous-panic ;)
***
„What do you mean never?”
‘Seriously Jason, it’s a five letter word. One of the most common used in English. With all the books on your account this is not the question you should be asking.”
***
It was a Saturday night.
Movie night.
Y/N and Jason facilely decided that after all week of working/vigilanting, some silly teenage drama to cool off and relax would be in place.
And that’s how they ended up watching „To all the boys I’ve loved before”.
Or rather - binging through the whole trilogy.
Or - in other words - giving commentary and laughing at every other silly, cliche scene.
And it was so good and so nice and so peaceful, finally not having a care in the world and just relaxing in each other’s company.
Any other guy would probably complain about the choice and force his way to Fast and furious or some Jason Statham action movie, but not Jason. Truthfully as long as they were both spread comfortably on the couch, his head on her lap, being treated with the most welcomed head scalp massage, he might have watched the Paw patrol or Dora the explorer and not say a word.
However-
All good things must come to an end.
After something around 4 hours they finally reached the prom scene. The choosing king and queen of the ball scene. And the slow dancing scene.
And that changed the serene atmosphere.
„Do you see that Y/N? Come on, this guy can’t even lead her properly. I swear if he was moving like that in a real life poor girl will have her feet trampled.”
„Guess they should have hired you for the scene.” Y/N laughed in response.
„Damn right they should have! After all you were the one to say I remind you of the guy who plays -- what was his name again?” Jason rolled on his back so he could stare up at his girlfriend.
‘PETER!” she laughed as if they didn’t hear that name like 100 times already
„Right! Right, Peter! Of course! Still think I’m way more handsome though-”
„Damn, you’re such a tease Todd!”
„You’re my girlfriend, you’re supposed to agree with me!” Jason sat up abruptly, turning her head back from him and towards the screen. „Now, watch it carefully and confirm my theory. He doesn’t know how to slow dance, does he?. Seriously, from a girl’s perspective. ‘’
„I --”
„Are you blind now?” Jason smirked at her indecisiveness.  
„Hey!” the punch on his arm did nothing to hurt him but was definitely a surprise
„Just admit it! Guys don’t dance like that! This is not the way a girl- a woman-- should be held!”
„How would I know?!” she finally exploded, her emotions pushed forward because of Jason’s obliviousness.
„What do you mean--?”
„I never slow danced!”
‘Never?” now that was shocking. Yes, they rarely dwelt in the past, especially the time frame in which Jason was absent, but how come he never knew about that?! shit, what else did she missed from the teenage/young adult years? And how the fudge he didn’t make it right yet?!
‘Do you want me to spell it out for you?” she rolled her eyes stopping the movie „N-E-V-E-R”
„you’re right it’s a five letter word. One of the most commonly used in English. But to me, in this context, it doesn’t make any sense.” he grabbed her hands pulling her forward to him and looking straight into her eyes, smirking. „That’s bullshit and I won’t be fooled.”
„You’re being fooled by not being fooled.”
��Huh?” damn that girl had some twisted logic on her. „the hell does that mean?”
„It means I’m telling the truth.” she blushed slightly despite her best effort to act cool. It was a bit embarrassing to admit to her boyfriend that she lacked in the experiences of youth.
„No shit!” he laughed
„This is not funny!”
„This is plenty funny!”
„Oh, like you slowed danced before!”
„I didn’t get to go to prom, cause as you might have noticed I’ve been dead at the time--’
„Like I could ever forget that.” she rolled her eyes in annoyance to cover up for the heartache she felt at the memory.
„- I did slow dance.”
„What now?! With who!? Cause definitely not with me!”
„Is someone jealous now?” Jason leaned forward
„You wish Todd!”
„Jealousy is a bad trait, you know. I’d advice you to stop it baby...”
„Or what?”
‘Or I might have to actually help you enrich your experience.”
„Oh really, and how --?”
That sentence was cut by a involuntary squeak as Jason pulled her to her feet, almost causing the girl to crash with his hard chest due to the force.
„Shit, sorry Y/N. Forgot how tiny and light you are.”
„I am--”
„Sh.” the tone of his voice and the gesture of putting his finger to her lips definitely couldn't stand opposition.  „don’t you dare saying another word, I forbid you. You are tiny and light. And now, I’m going to make you feel like a fragile princess in the arms of a handsome and brave prince.”
One of his hand found a way to her waist, the other to her shoulder blades, grabbing her firmly but delicately. For some crazy reason she actually did feel secure and loved in his hands. Like nothing wrong could happen as long as she was held like this.
As long as his eyes were focused solely on her.
And it was both terrifying and wonderful experience.
„You can touch me, you know. It’s not like you haven’t done it before....” Jason chuckled at the way her hands hung awkwardly by her sides
„You’re ruining the moment, dipshit!”
„You’re the one using invectives baby. Don’t get any silly ideas in your head. You’re not going anywhere. Not until you get that slow dance.”
‘I’m make-up-less and wearing sweatpants.”
„And you’re still the prettiest girl in the world ”
„We don’t have any music.” she objected almost causing Jason to groan.
„Here.” he grabbed her hand and put it to his heart „feel that rhythm?” she nodded „good. Very good. Now this is the only sound you should be focusing on. Cause it resounds for you. You hear me, Y/N?”
„I hear you....” she whispered
„It’s only for you, baby.”
„i thought you weren’t romantic....” his grip on her tightened as he pulled her closer to him, swaying gently right and left, their feet barely moving, but it was still considered slow-dancing for them.
„I’m not. But I can be for you....” he muttered against her hair, planting a gentle kiss on the top of her head „You even made me dance, which is enough of a sign that I’ll do anything for you. I’ll be whatever you want me to be.”
„Can you just be yourself? The guy I fell for?”
„I suppose that can be arranged.” he smiled, even though she couldn’t see it with her face pressed to his chest.
And they would stay in this silence, moving to their own song for much longer if it wasn’t for their cat jumping on the couch, right on the pilot, and resuming the movie on the prom dance performance.  
Giving Y/N and Jason a chance to put that scene into reality and adapting it into her their lives.
First time.
With many more to come.
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okay-j-hannah · 2 months
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Part 8: The Favor
Teen Wolf : Multishot
Stiles Stilinski x Reader
Word Count: 13.5k
Warnings: series rewrite, season 2 {aka 2011}, slow burn, friends to lovers, Stiles pining and depressed, usual teen wolf levels of violence and gore, heart conditions, talk of scars {good}, amnesia, finger picking, AGAIN ANGSTY AS HELL
Request: This just came from my own head 😊  
A/N: Don't worry
100% recommend listening to rain sounds when you get to the end part where it's a thunderstorm.
Part 7: The Summer Filter
Part 8: The Favor {You Are Here}
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“No, I’m sorry, who are you?” The look on your face sends a wave of hurt down Stiles. “How do you know my name?”
He’s gripping the steering wheel of the jeep, cruising with Scott and Allison in the car. Lydia had gone missing about twenty minutes ago, the police at the hospital taking witness statements and rallying an APB.
With you indisposed, the trio decide to take matters into their own hands. That doesn’t mean Stiles is free of the hurt. You really have no idea who he is.
“Alright, but if Lydia’s turning, would they actually kill her?”
Allison is fretful, “I don’t know. They won’t tell me anything. Okay, all they say is, ‘We’ll talk after Kate’s funeral when the others get here.’”
“What others?” Stiles looks in the rearview mirror.
“They won’t tell me that, either.”
Stiles sighs, “Okay, your family’s got some serious communication issues to work on.” He yells at Scott whose head is out the window, “Scott, are we going the right way?”
Scott sniffs the rushing air and says, “Take the next right!”
“This is really turning into a real shit night.”
Allison is chewing on her fingers, “(Y/N) really doesn’t remember us?”
“She’s lost her memory from the last few months,” Stiles bites the inside of his cheek. “She remembers last summer but doesn’t remember starting her job at the hospital. That means her memory stops around October of last year.”
“God…” Allison mumbles, “Did they say if her memory would come back?”
Stiles digs his thumb into the ridges of the wheel, “They called it retrograde amnesia, and there’s a chance the memory loss could come back if they treat the underlying cause. But the cause was an anoxic brain, and they just needed to oxygenate her body to fix that. I don’t…” he slams a hand against the wheel as Scott slides back into the car. “This is what happened to…”
“Happened to…?” Allison presses, but it was Scott who answers.
“His mom,” Scott’s voice was quiet and full of sympathy. “There were days she didn’t know who Stiles was.”
Allison looks mortified, “Stiles, I am so…”
“How close are we?” Stiles cuts in, jaw set.
Scott points toward the woods, “It’s coming from that direction. We’re definitely closer – the scent is stronger.”
“There’s no way she’s a werewolf, right?” Allison says in a shaky voice, an attempt to get past the topic of you. Clearly this expedition to save Lydia was a way to distract Stiles. “You said her bite didn’t heal.”
“I know,” Scott frowns, not-so-subtly looking over at his friend to gauge the hurt he was feeling. “Maybe it was a late reaction?”
“I don’t think so,” Stiles muses, tone a little rigid, “This has got to be something else. Peter made it clear that she either turns or she’s dead.”
Scott directs the jeep further into the woods, “Maybe we should try to get ahold of Derek?”
“I’m done being on speaking terms with psychotic alpha werewolves,” Stiles goes off road into the trees and leaf-strewn ground. “I want that guy out of here by the next full moon.”
“Do you think he’ll leave town now that he’s gotten his revenge?” Allison muses, eyeing the back of Stiles’ head just as much as Scott was looking. “He avenged his sister, right?”
Scott shrugs, “I wouldn’t be surprised if he wants to create a pack of his own.”
“And he can do that somewhere else,” Stiles scoffs, bouncing along with the jeep, “Go back to wherever he was the last six years.”
“(Y/N) wasn’t bitten, right?” Allison asks quietly.
Stiles is quick with the answer, “No, just… she was just thrown around a bit. No teeth action.”
“With all the supernatural stuff happening to us… hearing about (Y/N)’s heart problems just seems so – human, don’t you think?”
Scott gives his girlfriend a warning look, “Yeah, you’re right.”
“I think her memory will…”
“Can we drop the whole (Y/N)-amnesia thing?!” Stiles grumbles.
Allison is swift in her retort, “She’s my friend too, Stiles. I’m allowed to be worried about her just as much as you!”
“Let’s not do this right now,” Scott says in a louder voice. “Lydia’s scent is coming from there.”
Stiles parks the jeep, leading the way into the moonlit forest and the house far in the distance. The Hale House. He’s still grumpy as he asks, “She came here? You sure?”
Scott stands back with Allison, hands nearly touching, “Yeah, this is where the scent leads.”
They keep walking, “Alright, but has Lydia ever been here?”
Allison shakes her head, “Not with me. I don’t think with (Y/N) either.” She talks with Scott in hushed tones, “Maybe she came here on instinct, like she was looking for Derek.”
“You mean, looking for an Alpha.”
“Wolves need a pack, right?” she asks, “Would she have been drawn to an Alpha? Is it an instinct to be part of a pack?”
“Yeah, we’re stronger in packs.” They watch Stiles wander around the tree line, inspecting the area as he goes. “Like literally stronger, faster, better in every way.”
They could see the breaths coming from their mouths, it was so cold. Allison pulls her beanie over her ears, “That’s the same for an Alpha?”
Scott nods as something tightens around his ankle and lifts him into the air. Allison muffles a scream and backs away, watching her boyfriend be pulled toward a tree.
Stiles makes a funny choking sound, squatting on the ground and holding a black wire between his fingers, “Sorry, buddy.”
“Stiles, next time you see a tripwire… don’t trip it.”
Allison smiles, cheeks rosy from the cold, “Let’s get….”
“Wait, wait, wait!” Scott flails in the air, waving them off, “Someone’s coming. Hide!”
The pair of them jump into action, Stiles grabbing Allison’s arm to pull her back towards the woods. No sooner had their footsteps soften on the leaves as they hide behind a tree, did a group of hunters appear from the backside of the house.
“Oh, shit,” Allison mumbles into Stiles’ shoulder, “They probably thought about Derek too.”
“I can’t hear anything they’re saying,” Stiles bemoans, “This is stupid.”
Allison clutches his arm, “It’s going to be okay.”
In a quick motion, Stiles slams his head into the tree. Considering they were already pressed into it, the hit wasn’t that hard. “Things are anything but okay.”
~~~
The boys huddle into the locker rooms as Coach yells for them. Isaac fumbles with his equipment, joining the back of the pack.
“Quicker!” Finstock yells, “Danny, put a shirt on.” The coach prattles on, “Stilinski, that means you! Let’s go, gather round. Listen up.”
Isaac searches the office wall behind Finstock, looking for you. You were always near the Coach during team meetings, usually holding an energy drink or pointing out things Finstock failed to mention to the team.
But you are nowhere to be seen.
“Police are asking for help on a missing child advisory. It’s a sick girl, roaming around, totally naked.”
Isaac remembers how the Sheriff questioned him about the same advisory that morning when he reported the strange grave robbery at the cemetery.
“Now, it’s supposed to get below 40 degrees tonight. I don’t know about you, but the last time it was that cold, and I was running around naked… I lost a testicle to exposure. Now, I don’t want the same thing happening to some innocent girl. So police are organizing search parties for tonight.” The Coach brandishes a piece of paper and Isaac can visualize the rolling of your eyes at the poor delivery of the speech.
Finstock tapes the paper to his office window, “Sign up, find the missing girl, you get an automatic ‘A’ in my classes.” He smiles at the instantaneous cheers, but Isaac is of the few standing still.
He holds his duffel bag and looks for you again. There was no way you’d let Coach give students straight A’s like that. You were his voice of reason – the only way classes came out coherently and fairly graded.
A swarm of players rush past him, but Isaac lets his eyes roam until he finds Stiles and Scott. He knew you were friendly with those two, more so than him at least. He walks over to the boys at the shower entrance.
“Um… hey…” he says awkwardly, holding the strap of his bag with two tight hands.
Scott looks taken aback, but is friendly anyways, “Hey, Isaac.”
Stiles is a little more blunt, “What do you want?”
“I uh… I wanted to ask where (Y/N) was,” he wrings his hands, “Usually she’s at these team meetings.” He notices the way Stiles looks to the ground, letting Scott speak first.
“She’s still at the hospital,” he says calmly, “She won’t be back for a while.”
Isaac knits his brow, “Oh, is she okay?” Again, he notices how Stiles scoffs at his shoes.
“Yeah,” Scott says with a lackluster tone, “She’ll be fine. Did you need her for something? We can give her a message.”
“Just… I haven’t seen her in class and – we miss her.” He has a hard time looking them in the eye, “And maybe that Coach is running rampant without her.” His lips upturn ever-so-slightly, “She’ll want to know her assisting is very much appreciated.”
“I’m sorry,” Stiles cuts in front of Scott’s laughter. “I didn’t realize you and (Y/N) were close?”
Isaac wipes the smile from his face. “We’re not. Not outside of class at least.” He grinds his teeth, “She’s great. She’s always been kind to me. I’d hate if something happened and I didn’t know about it.”
That seems to appease Stiles, a flash of guilt washing over his face. “Right.”
~~~
The days seem to darken. Even with the promise of spring right around the corner, the world seems dusky, like the sun was a dimmer set low. Stiles’ lens was filtered with gray, shadowing his perspective with melancholia.
He spends his afternoons chasing the supernatural with Scott. But his nights he spends alone – quiet – in his room. He sits at his desk, spinning from side to side to look at the bulletin boards on the walls.
The one directly in front of him was all about you. He had covered it up with a blanket when you slept over that one time. A family picture and a selfie he got from your social media are pinned in the middle. Countless strings are between the picture of you and little bits of information.
A few green strings lead to fun facts like:
Watches true crime
Likes to read
Works at Beacon Hills Memorial Hospital
Born in Palo Alto, California
Fireman Tom
Front Desk Westbrook
Atrioventricular canal defect
A yellow string leads from the fact about a congenital heart defect. It spreads to multiple pictures, article clippings, and website screenshots on the heart problem.
“Children born with this condition have a hole in the wall between the heart’s chambers. They also have problems with the valves that control blood flow in the heart.
Atrioventricular canal defect allows extra blood to flow to the lungs. The extra blood forces the heart to work too hard, causing the heart muscle to grow larger.”
“Ventricular tachycardia is a type of irregular heartbeat, called an arrhythmia. It starts in the lower chambers of the heart, called the ventricles. A healthy heart typically beats about 60 to 100 times a minute at rest. In ventricular tachycardia, the heart beats faster, usually 100 or more beats a minute.
Sometimes the rapid heartbeat stops the heart chambers from properly filling with blood. The heart may not be able to pump enough blood to the body. If this happens, you may feel short of breath or lightheaded. Some people lose consciousness.”
He has a red string leading to an unknown section about the 3-inch incision on your chest. After hearing you mention that it was a device inserted near your heart, he did some more research. It might have been an implantable cardioverter-defibrillator, or an ICD.
Those devices detect irregular heartbeats and deliver electric shocks to hopefully restore a regular heart rhythm.
Other blue strings lead to theories he has about why your CHD correction wasn’t permanent, as well as solutions to your persistent tachycardia.
The other side of the board has a few other green strings that lead to a picture of you, Lydia, and Allison. Another is the name ‘Andrew’ written sloppily and then crossed out repeatedly with a ballpoint pen. A few short strings lead to the various situationships in your past and some notes on their kissing techniques.
Overall, Stiles was proud of the research he had conducted on you. But staring at it wasn’t making him feel any better. He was exhausting himself over retrograde amnesia, failing to put those details on your bulletin board.
He was hoping it would correct itself before he had to.
He barely registers that his dad enters the room. “Hey, kid,” he says, void of his sheriff uniform. “How you holding up?”
Stiles shrugs and it pulls a sigh out of Noah. “Listen, I’m glad we were able to find that Martin girl tonight. We should consider that a real victory.” Stiles just nods and Noah continues, “I uh… what in god’s name is that?”
He looks over Stiles’ bulletin board. “Research,” Stiles mumbles.
Noah sounds hesitant, “Right. Um… should I be concerned about this?” He searches his son’s vacant expression, “Like, are you peeping into her windows and stealing things from her underwear drawer?”
“What?” that snaps some life into Stiles, “No! No, dad, it’s not like that. It was a little inside joke from when we first started hanging out. Then it kind of turned into me trying to figure out what her heart problem was.”
Noah looks to the side with the medical research, “You know… uh, the Westbrooks called.”
“And?” Stiles looks up with dull brown eyes.
“And the doctor says (Y/N) should be exposed to things that might trigger her memory back. Stuff that she doesn’t remember.”
Stiles bites at the inside of his cheek, “Like me?”
Noah takes a deep breath, folding his arms. The reserved Stiles before him was disconcerting. “Having you visit might help.” The Sheriff tries to find something helpful to say – his wife was always better at these things. “They’ve had Scott sit with her and she remembers the few times they ran into each other during her early hospital days; back when she was still getting surgeries.”
“I don’t know how I… how do I sit there and…” Stiles leaves his hands limp in his lap. “How am I supposed to help? Pretend that I don’t know anything about her? Act like we’re meeting for the first time?”
“Maybe,” Noah grimaces, “I’d start with keeping this bulletin board to yourself. It might scare her into getting a restraining order.”
Stiles cracks the smallest smile, “How long is she going to be at the hospital?”
“About two or three days,” the Sheriff scratches the scruff on his chin, “They’ll probably keep her from school for even longer.”
“She’ll need to keep up on homework,” Stiles sighs, “She’d hate to miss out on so many assignments.” His small smile grows, “Of course she’s already done with her end of term projects.”
Noah smiles, “Even that biology one you guys were supposed to do together?”
Stiles shrugs, “Honestly, I don’t have a clue.”
They both share a laugh before Noah beckons him, “You should go. I’ll tell Tom you’re on your way.” He looks at his son, nostalgia flooding him.
Little Stiles jumping across waiting room seats. Little Stiles following the nurses around. Little Stiles foraging for snacks in the vending machines. Little Stiles afraid to talk to his mother who didn’t recognize him.
Little Stiles that cried in the hallway while he was busy with a police dispatch.
“Hey, it’ll…” Noah tries, “… it’ll be okay.”
Stiles looks drained, but he smiles at his father’s attempt. “Thanks dad.”
It was a long drive to the hospital. It felt like the world around him was moving in slow motion. It was like his jeep was gliding on the road with no traction. It didn’t help that he let the ringing in his ears be the only source of sound.
There was a tightness in his chest that wasn’t as warm as before. It was accompanied by an anxious knot in his stomach. Hospitals were bad enough. He doesn’t need to be reminded of his mother while he sits with you.
Knots in his shoulders, he walks into the hospital with shuffling steps. He vaguely remembers running into Melissa. He barely notices how the Westbrooks dismiss themselves to grab lunch.
He’s in your doorway and watching the line of confusion grow between your brows. The look of someone meeting a stranger.
And he’s suddenly eight years old again.
“Hi, (Y/N),” he says with a growing lump in his throat.
You fidget with the blanket laying over your legs. Your eyes are uncertain, “Hello. Um… are my parents…?”
“They’re grabbing lunch,” he says, hands in his pockets, “Is it okay if I visit for a bit? The doctor said it might trigger your memory.”
You look reluctant and it pains him. “I guess it’s worth a shot,” you watch him pull a chair over, “I don’t think you told me your name before.”
He tries to swallow past the lump, “Stiles.”
“Stiles,” you say quietly, as if you had never said the name before. “Stiles what?”
“Stilinski.”
Your eyes brighten, “You’re a Stilinski?”
He snorts, “Yeah, my dad’s the sheriff.”
“Woah,” you smile, “Your dad has been to my house a few times.”
Stiles nods, reminiscent of your first conversation together searching the woods for Scott all those weeks ago. “And you’re front desk Westbrook’s daughter.”
That makes you giggle, “I like that nickname.” It grows quiet for a few seconds while you consider his deflated figure. His eyes are downcast and his hands are stuffed in his pockets; you can see his leg starting to bounce. “Are we really good friends?”
His muted brown eyes turn to your brighter ones. “Yeah, we are.”
You nod, “For how long?”
“Since January when the school came back from winter break.”
You give a side smile, “So I did manage to start public school.”
He licks his lips, “Yep. And being a medical assistant here and being a teacher’s assistant to Coach.”
“That’s amazing,” you remark, “I didn’t realize… I’ve been dreaming about doing those things for years, but the fact I did… and I don’t even remember.”
Stiles frowns deep, “You haven’t gotten any of your memory back?”
You shake your head, “I get these flashes sometimes and I can’t tell if they’re dreams or not. Like… blue spray paint on my arms.”
Stiles’ face brightens with hope, “That’s – that’s real! That’s not a dream. We had a spray paint fight when we were fixing my jeep.”
Your eyes snap to his. A strange guilty feeling enters your stomach. It was bad enough disappointing people simply because you couldn’t remember them. Seeing the hope on his face makes you fill with pressure. You two must’ve had a pretty significant friendship.
“What other things have we done together?”
Stiles takes a tight breath, “Well… we’ve had dinner together. You’re an excellent cook. We painted my jeep and took Scott to get drunk on the preserve. We did a few school projects together and hang out at lacrosse practice. I took care of you when you were sick,” he suddenly looks you right in the eye, “I was there when you broke up with Andrew.”
Your eyebrows go up, but you don’t interrupt him.
“I was there when you got those claw marks on your shoulder – and other times you felt in danger,” he swallows hard, “We went to the winter formal together.”
“I went to a school dance?” you breathe out quietly. “Was it amazing? I’ve always wanted to go to a school dance.”
Stiles rubs his suddenly clammy hands down his pants, “It was. You looked great.” At seeing the light shining in your eyes, he continues. “You wore a dress that had these sparkling stars on it. The… y-you let the scars on your chest show. You were… you looked beautiful.”
“Did we slow dance?”
“Yeah, we did,” he sighs, chest aching. “It was the only dancing you could do that didn’t mess with your heart.”
You feel a drop of insecurity enter, “How much do you know about my heart?”
“I know about the heart defect and the tachycardia,” he rubs at his face. He could really take advantage of the situation here and learn more about your condition. But as quick as the thought came, it left. He wasn’t going to manipulate you like that. “I know you had a device put in last summer.”
“And that’s it?” you ask quietly. “I didn’t tell you more?”
“You always felt like it wasn’t the right time,” he shrugs, “But I suppose you might feel differently once your memory comes back.”
You brush your hair away, “I’m sorry I don’t remember.”
A sadness creeps into him. “It’s not your fault.”
“I’m still sorry. I hate seeing the disappointment,” you gesture to his slumped figure, “I really am trying.”
“I believe you,” Stiles says with a little more vigor.
Your eyes are a little wide as you say, “My mom told me you were the one to find me and bring me here.”
Stiles bows his head, visions of your bloodied figure going purple from the lack of oxygen. “Like I said… it’s not your fault.”
“And you’re saying it’s yours?” It was an honest question, but you said it with such sarcasm that it takes you aback to see the seriousness on his face. He really believes it was his fault. “From what I hear, you saved me Stiles.”
“Not all of you,” he winces a smile, leaning back in the chair, “If I had been sooner… maybe your heart wouldn’t have given out in the parking garage.”
“You don’t know that,” you say quietly. You may not recognize the boy, but it upset you to think he was blaming himself for your condition. “Regardless of whatever retort you can think of… you brought me to help. If you hadn’t done that then I would’ve been dead for sure.”
He doesn’t see the point in arguing with a version of you that doesn’t even know him. “Maybe. How has your heart been since being here?”
“Fine,” you say quickly, “I’m ready to get back home.”
“Ollie misses you,” he smirks.
You gush, “Oh my god, you know Oliver! He’s my handsome little man.”
“That he is…” Stiles laughs, “Very handsome.” He plays with his fingers, leg still bouncing from the rising anxiety in his stomach. “Is this helping with your amnesia at all?”
Your shoulders rise in a shrug, “I’m not sure. Nothing has come to me yet. But I do like talking to you.” You have a sweet smile on your face, “You mentioned I was dating someone named Andrew?”
“Just for like two weeks,” he says hotly.
You don’t notice, “I told myself I wouldn’t ser…”
“…seriously date anyone,” Stiles finishes, “That’s why you broke up. He was looking for something long term with you.”
Curious, you tilt your head to the side. “Was he cute?”
Stiles snorts, “Well… I guess. You had a crush on him.” He tries to stop his leg bouncing, “You have good taste too, he’s a good guy.”
“Is that why we went to the dance together?” you wonder, “Because I broke up with Andrew?”
“Technically we both went stag,” he says with a faux smile. A forced smile to keep you at ease. “But it was important to you to have the full experience – so I asked.”
You sigh, leaning against your pillows in thought, “You don’t realize how lucky you are to live such an average teenage life.” Stiles holds back his sarcastic laugh. What you said was so ironic. “I spent a lot of my life dreaming about the little things – silly things – like high school dances and playing sports and learning to drive.”
“Wait…” Stiles leans forward, “You don’t know how to drive?”
“No, I do,” you say defensively, “I have a license, technically.” You slump a little further, “But medically I’m not allowed to drive. The potential for fainting is a big red flag for driving. I don’t want to cause any accidents because my heart decided to give out on the road.”
Stiles has a wary smile on his face. “That’s okay, I drive you everywhere.”
“Is that with the jeep you mentioned?”
“Yep, my pride and joy,” he says, “It was my mom’s. She called him Roscoe.”
You remember how the Sheriff lost his wife. Something your parents told you after a few visits from him. You remember feeling sad that someone had died. Now you realize how sad it would be for a child to lose their mom as well.
“And we fixed him up one time?” You want to hear him talk more.
“Yeah, we put a new hood on him,” Stiles sighs out a smile. “You kept poking fun at how… how much duct tape and spray paint I have for him.”
You have a sweet smile on your face, “You want the car to last, I get it. Probably will be just duct tape by the time you turn him in.”
“Oh no,” Stiles waves his hands, “I’m going to keep this jeep for the rest of my life, even if it runs down. I’ll import custom parts to keep him fixed, I don’t care. I just need to find a way to make enough money to.”
You giggle and it strikes Stiles.
“What sort of job would that be?”
“I don’t know, maybe like an FBI agent or something.”
“FBI…” you nod, impressed, “That’d be cool.”
Stiles swallows, unsure of how to keep a conversation going with you. That was a feeling he wasn’t used to. It was so easy to talk to you before. He hates the awkward edge he feels brimming his smile.
“What about you?”
“Another one of those silly things I dream about,” you say sadly, “I don’t know what I’d do.”
His brow knits, “Spitball some ideas for me.”
You laugh again, “Maybe… a writer. Or maybe I’d open a cat rescue. Even better, what if I opened a cat café where you could read and buy books and pet cats.” The more you talk, the easier it was to spill your dreams. “I could be a nurse one day. Maybe work under a cardiothoracic surgeon. I could also just be a stay-at-home mom.”
Stiles feels that achy warmth in his chest more and more. “You want a family?”
“Of course,” you say as if it were the easiest decision in the world. “I always hated being an only child. It made being stuck at home so much worse. I’d want a bunch of kids.”
“How much is a bunch?”
You smirk, “I don’t know, like ten maybe.”
“Ten!?” Stiles jerks in his chair and it makes you laugh louder than before.
You wave a hand, “I’m kidding. I think four might be my max.”
Stiles wipes at his brow comically and your following giggle keeps that ache pulsing in his chest. “I think all those ideas are great. I think I’d even read a book written by you.”
“Are you not a big book reader?” you ask.
He winces, “If it’s not for research I don’t usually partake.”
“That’s a shame. There’s some really good fiction out there,” you smile. But there’s a sudden shift in your expression. “Have we had this conversation before?”
Stiles feels a tug at his heart, “No, actually. We don’t talk about the future much. Usually it’s whatever has happened in the past before we met – or what our friends are up to.”
You nod, a little reassured. “I would hate it if you just pretended like you didn’t already know this stuff about me.”
“When it comes to you, (Y/N),” he says confidently, “I’d say I’m scarily unfiltered. I say things to you that I don’t to anyone else. I don’t think I could pretend.” Even with his feelings for you – they came out in the littlest of ways without him voicing them directly.
That puts the smile back on your face, “It makes me sad not remembering you. It sounds like we got along really well.”
“We did,” he says quickly, “We do.”
You pull at the edge of your cotton blanket, “Our friends seem nice too – Allison and Lydia.”
“Nice might be a little kind for Lydia,” Stiles laughs, “Maybe a faux cold-hearted rich bitch is more appropriate.” He feels proud to rouse a look of shock on your face, “She’s all talk at school, but she has a good heart and is super smart. Just don’t get on her bad side.”
You chuckle, “And Scott sat with me a couple times. He looks different than what I remembered.”
“It’s been almost six months from where you memory ends,” he says, “That makes sense to me.”
“Do you…” you falter, “Do you think I will remember eventually?”
God, I hope so, he thinks. “I think you’ll get a few things back,” he says honestly, “I don’t know about everything. Amnesia is stupid like that.”
You frown, “Will you still – hang out with me?”
“Of course,” he says instantly, “If you want to. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I know it’s probably overwhelming.”
“It is,” you push back your hair again, “But I still want to try.”
~~~
The next week is full of anxiety. With spring right around the corner, March appears with sunny days and average temperatures. The promise of rain was on the way. It was nearing the next full moon and Stiles was full to the brim with nerves.
You still hadn’t come back to school, and he was finding it hard to come visit you. Meanwhile he and Scott try to tackle school one day at a time. Scott finds ways to see Allison while the overly watchful eyes of her grandfather become an increasing pressure.
The old man, Gerard, was still living at the Argent residence after his daughter’s funeral. His presence brought a newfound fear to the group.
He was the one at your door when you heard it knock.
“Hello, (Y/N),” he says with a smile. “I’m Mr. Argent, the new principal at Beacon Hill High.”
You blink a few times before awkwardly saying, “Right, um… hello.”
He raises his eyebrows, “May I come in?”
You look behind your shoulder for a moment before muttering, “Sure, we can sit here.” You gesture to the sitting room with the piano just beside the door. The older man nods his thanks and finds a seat in a comfy armchair.
You follow and sit on the loveseat opposite him. “How can I help you?”
“I’m just checking in on your progress since leaving the hospital. Many of your teachers have asked about you returning. I understand you experienced some memory loss the night of the school dance.”
“Yes,” you say, sitting on your hands, “I don’t remember any of it.”
He leans his elbows on his knees, looking at you seriously, “And you haven’t regained anything?”
“I get these flashes sometimes,” you mutter, looking towards the carpet beneath your toes. “But those seem like dreams to me. I don’t recognize them.” At his persistent look, you elaborate, “Like visiting the mall or a lacrosse field or the woods.”
He nods, “I’m sorry to hear that. Do you have any intention of returning to public school?”
You swallow hard, “Well, um… seeing as I don’t remember any of it – I think it would be hard to pick up where I left off.”
“Our staff is willing to accommodate to your situation,” he finally leans back, “We’ll give you special permission to use more resources and have extension time on all assignments. We want to make sure you’re comfortable in returning.”
“That’s good to know,” you say, noticing Oliver enter the sitting room. He jumps onto the couch with you, “I’ll need to talk to my parents about it.”
Gerard gives another strange smile, “Of course. Are you getting any of your course work from friends at least?”
You grimace – does he mean the friends you don’t remember? “I’ve had a few homework things dropped off.”
“Some from my granddaughter, I believe,” he chuckles, “She’s always had a good heart, that one.”
“Who is your granddaughter?”
“Allison Argent,” he says.
You widen your eyes, “Oh, yes – Allison. She’s been helping me with some assignments. I didn’t realize her grandfather was the principal.”
“Like I said, my position is relatively new.” He claps his hands together, “Please reach out to the office if you plan on returning full time.”
Meanwhile, in the middle of town, Stiles and Allison are at a hardware store looking for something to help Scott with the upcoming full moon. Allison was intent on being involved this month, her first full moon since learning the truth of it all.
“You used handcuffs last time?”
“On the radiator, yeah,” Stiles grumbles, looking at the shelves stocked with tools. “And he still got out and almost killed (Y/N).”
Allison gasps softly, “You’re kidding.”
“Not at all. If Derek hadn’t shown up, I think he would’ve…” he stops at the end of the aisle, “We need something that won’t break as easily. Heavy duty.”
“Like… chains?”
Stiles waggles a finger at her, “I like your thinking.” He checks the signs above each aisle for what they need. “We can chain him up somewhere until the moon sets.”
She follows, her intentions on more than just helping Scott with the full moon. “(Y/N)’s told me you haven’t been visiting her.”
It’s like she can see the tension knot in his shoulders. His sneakers squeak on the tile floor, “And you have been?”
“I’ve been helping her keep up to date on our school assignments.” She watches the hunch develop in his posture. It was like he was deflating before her eyes, “Don’t you remember the doctor said exposing her to things she…”
“Yeah, I know,” Stiles says a little more coldly than before. “It’s just that…” He spots the chains and goes for them.
How does he tell Allison that seeing you might finally break his already tearing heart? He’s sure seeing the look in your eyes again – the polite look someone gives a stranger – would kill him. How does he explain the pain he feels knowing you don’t remember a single memorable thing you’ve done together? It was a new kind of rejection.
He prefers daydreaming about the you that knows him. The you that he feels more deeply about than anyone else before. The you that he now searches for in his sleep. It was now his favorite time of day.
Sleep meant he could dream about you. He could see you there, smelling of sparkling strawberries by the lake – looking like a sun warmed burst of color. He yearned for that peachy summer filter your presence brought to his life.
His days were dull without you. Like the world resorted to turning the brightness down because its sun had disappeared.
“I’ve been…”
“… distracting yourself?” Allison offers.
He grips a coiled pile of chains and pulls them over his shoulder, “Maybe. The full moon kind of takes priority the next couple of days.”
“Do you think (Y/N)’s in danger?”
“Not if this idea works,” he grumbles under the weight of the metal links. They walk towards the registers. “And with you helping it might make things easier.”
Allison pulls out some cash so they can split the cost. “First searching for Lydia, then looking into a new beta werewolf, now making plans for the full moon… you’re going to run out of distractions eventually.”
I’ll just sleep then, he thinks. You’ll be waiting for him there.
“Let’s tackle this first,” he says.
Allison sighs her frustration. “I wish there was a way we could just… reach in and pull the memories out, you know? Make her remember.”
Stiles drops the full weight of the chains on his foot, and he curses loudly, “Ah, fuck!” He bounces on his unhurt foot, panting as he has a stroke of brilliance.
Maybe there was a way to force your memories to the surface.
 ~~~
Scott is lying on your living room floor, Ollie hiding upstairs from the doggish presence. You’re sitting cross legged on the couch ottoman, listening to his woes.
“So you think the principal became the principal to spy on your secret relationship with Allison?”
“No, there’s got to be more to it than that,” Scott grumbles, arms splayed to either side. “He’s looking for something more. The Argents are… very loyal to their ideals. Once they set their minds to something – they accomplish it no matter what.”
“And by becoming principal, Mr. Argent is trying to accomplish… total domination over teenagers?”
Scott sighs out a laugh, sitting up, “Maybe. I’m sorry – I’m venting too much. It’s got to be super confusing for you.”
You shrug, “Just a little. I’m starting to piece things together.” You start to pick at your nails, a nervous habit you’ve been more partial to since the hospital. “Allison has been a big help. I think Lydia is still recovering from the attack, more than me at least.”
“And Stiles?”
You frown, “I haven’t seen him.”
Scott matches your frown, “He’s taken it pretty hard.”
“I thought as much,” you pick at your cuticles, “Why do you think that is?”
Sensing the touchy subject, Scott looks to the ground. “We all deal with hard stuff in our own way.”
“But he told me he still wanted to see me,” you say confusedly, “Even if I didn’t remember everything.”
“I think he holds a lot of guilt for the memory loss,” Scott defends, “He uh… he cares a lot.”
“I sort of got that from his last visit,” you wince, “I guess I wouldn’t want to be reminded of something I consider a failure.”
Scott furrows his brow, “You being alive isn’t a failure, (Y/N).”
“My amnesia is, though,” you sigh, “But it’s got me thinking… maybe there’s more to why he thinks of it as a failure.”
“What do you mean?”
You swallow, “I don’t know. It’s hard trying to figure this whole thing out. It’s like I’m trying to give a summary on a book I never read.”
“We’ve done that plenty of times in English class,” Scott smiles warily.
You chuckle at the joke. “I mean, I’m seeing the end of the movie without any plot. I don’t know what to make of anything I see. I hear of all these things I did, and it just feels like I’m out of the loop. I’m being told about someone I don’t even know.”
Scott nods at your words, happy to be your confidant. “It sounds hard.”
“And even with that, everyone is making an effort to stay connected to me. Everyone I don’t remember. Allison does homework with me, you vent to me about Allison, the hospital has put my work schedule on hold, the high school is making accommodations, even Lydia has texted me.” You grimace as you pull at the skin around your nail. Part of a cuticle tears away, “So why hasn’t Stiles? Why is he different?”
Scott bites his tongue. “This whole thing might mean something a little different for him.”
“In what way?”
“Just you,” he swallows, “You mean something different to him.”
“You mean, because he was the one who saved my life?”
Scott clenches his jaw, “Yeah, something like that.”
You suck on your finger. It stings where you tore the cuticle away. You taste blood on your tongue.
“We should do something,” Scott decides, “We should get the friends together and hang out.”
“And do what?” you ask, standing to find a band-aid.
Scott follows you to the hallway closet, “You have a firepit in the backyard. Maybe we roast some marshmallows?”
“You don’t think it might rain?” you wrap a plain brown band-aid around your finger. It almost surprises you to see two other fingers with the same bandage around the nail. “It’s been cloudy all week.”
“No, I think we’ve got a few more days before the weather gets real bad,” Scott waves a hand at you, “Would your parents be okay with it?”
“Sure,” you shrug, “My mom would probably be thrilled.”
Scott is already texting on his phone, “Perfect. I’ll let everyone know – do you have firewood?”
“Are you kidding?” you laugh, “My dad keeps the shed fully stocked. Marshmallows and everything.”
“It looks like Lydia is going to be at her dads place tonight,” Scott grimaces at his phone, “But Allison is available.”
You watch the dopey lovestruck smile grow on his face, “Won’t it… won’t it be terribly awkward for everyone? You guys have history to talk about while I… I don’t remember meeting any of you.”
Scott shifts his face into a serious expression, “That doesn’t mean we don’t want to still hang out with you.”
You fist your bandaged fingers into the pockets of your sweats. “I guess I can see it as a chance to get to know you guys better.”
“We could play like truth and dare, or answer get to know you questions,” Scott chuckles.
The next half hour has you creating a s’more station outside while Scott brings over a pile of firewood. He’s just exploring the depths of the shed when Allison appears, the sunset illuminating her in flattering light.
“Hey!” you say, glad to see her again, “I was just laying out the chocolate.”
Allison gives you a hug, eyeing her secret boyfriend carrying an armful of wood from the shed. “Perfect. Let me help with the camping chairs.” She hops over to kiss Scott before taking the covers off the chairs.
“Have you talked with Lydia recently?” you help move the seating around the firepit, “She was a little frazzled the last time I saw her.”
“She was a little shy coming back to school,” Allison admits, “But Lydia has always exuded a kind of confidence, even if she doesn’t especially feel it. The whole school was gawking at her, and she strut down the hallway like nothing happened.”
You nod, a smile of gratitude on your face, “I’m glad.” You notice how Allison deliberately set the chairs in two pairs across from each other, on either side of the firepit. She plans to sit by Scott, and across the fire, you sit by Stiles. “Is Stiles for sure coming?”
“He told me he would,” Scott throws a few more logs on their pile, “Just that he’d be late.”
As Scott was making a tent of wood in the firepit, a grumbling engine could be heard pulling in front of the house. You sit in your chair, matching cream colored sweatshirt and sweatpants on. You even had a green and blue flannel on over the sweatshirt for an added layer of warmth. It was something you just found in your closet.
Stiles appears walking around the house, hands in his pockets. His lips are in a thin line as he waves a hand in hello.
“How are you, Stiles?” Allison asks, ever the polite one.
He shrugs, eyes flitting between the remaining seats. He knows his best friend will want to sit beside his girlfriend. “I’m alright.”
Your eyebrows knit. Stiles doesn’t look very alright. He looks like he could collapse from exhaustion at any second.
“Hey, grab me some of that kindling, would you?” Scott says, kneeling beside the firepit and crumpling old newspapers into flammable balls.
Stiles leans down for a box of splintered wood and shaved bark. He gives the pieces for Scott to create a nest in the heart of the pit.
You fold your arms as the sun fully sets and the stars become more visible across the indigo sky. You observe the wrinkled nature of Stiles’ clothes – the dark rings beneath his eyes. He looks a little worse for wear.
“This is my first fire of the season,” Allison says, crossing her legs and admiring how Scott sets the kindling aflame, “I love having campfires.”
“Me too,” Scott says warmly, standing to go sit beside his girlfriend, “I’m a fiend for toasted marshmallows.”
“I like them a little on the burnt side,” she says in reply, enjoying how he easily slips his fingers between hers.
Stiles stands as the kindling burns more brightly, sending plumes of smoke into the air. His eyes find your form tightly wrapped in your chair. There’s a flicker of something sad in his gaze – guilt, pity, pain?
He walks around the pit and sits in the camping chair beside you. It was more like he collapsed in the chair, the legs scraping on the stones littering the ground.
“What about you?” you ask timidly.
Stiles looks at you with tired eyes, “Sorry?”
“How do you like your marshmallows roasted?”
His eyes are still sad, but something quirks in his lips, “Golden brown – although that’s dangerously close to burnt and that happens more often than I care to admit.”
“I don’t have patience for roasting marshmallows,” you say begrudgingly, “They’re never exactly what I want. I eat them too fast.”
Stiles swallows hard, moving his limbs slowly as if any faster would give him a headache. He spears two marshmallows on the end of a roasting stick. “And if you had patience for marshmallows – what would they look like?”
“I like them golden too,” you smile, “A little or a lot is fine with me. I just don’t like them burnt.”
“It gives them flavor!” Allison defies, “And it’s fun blowing them out when they catch fire.”
“Until they melt right off the stick,” Scott laughs, “And they burn in the pit like Anakin near the lava pools.”
You giggle, a strange flash of a dream crossing your mind. Yourself wearing a star wars t-shirt with a blue and green flannel. The same flannel you have on now. Was it a dream… or a memory? Was it like the strange memory of blue spray paint on your arms?
There was something stirring in your stomach. You could mistake it for anxiety or the painful churning of your insides – but something was trying to pry itself out of you. Watching Stiles rotate the roasting stick against the firepit was sending waves of familiarity through you.
The campfire reminds you of Stiles in a way. He reminds you of autumn and woods and campfire smoke. It makes you think of fallen leaves and flashlights and flannels.
Just as you remind Stiles of summertime – he reminds you of autumn.
“Did you hear about Isaac’s dad?” Allison suddenly speaks.
Scott sighs, “Yeah, he was taken out of lacrosse practice today to talk to the police.”
“I don’t think he has a strong case of his innocence,” Stiles mumbles.
“What happened to Isaac’s dad?” you ask, unsure of who Isaac even was.
Scott clears his throat, checking his marshmallow by pinching the soft white fluff. “He was murdered.”
Something cold and steely takes ahold of your limbs, “Oh my god, that’s terrible.”
“Yeah, it happened during the last rainstorm,” Scott continues, “I think they suspect Isaac.”
“Why would he kill his own father?” you ask with a slanted brow.
Allison prepares some graham crackers and chocolate, “I don’t think they had a very good relationship.”
“You could say that,” Stiles scratches at his neck, “Seeing as he comes to school with new bruises weekly.”
A small gasp escapes you, “That’s awful…”
“You’ve actually helped Isaac with it before,” Stiles says, “You’ve taken him to your house and cleaned him up after a fight.”
You find it hard to swallow, “I’m glad someone did. Has there ever been an investigation at the house for child abuse?”
“Not that I know of,” Stiles sighs, “Isaac has never wanted any trouble.”
“That doesn’t make any of it okay,” you say more to yourself, “Is he still being questioned?”
“I think my dad might take him into the station tomorrow for further questioning,” Stiles says.
You tilt your head towards him, “As in, Isaac is going to be arrested?”
“I’m not sure,” Stiles says quietly, “I wouldn’t be surprised seeing as he’s their biggest suspect with a damning motive.”
You don’t realize your fingers are searching for more tender skin to pick at around your nails. Scott puts his toasted marshmallow on a prepared cracker and proceeds to set another on fire. Allison giggles as she smashes one s’more down.
“I haven’t seen Isaac,” you say quizzically.
Scott presents the marshmallow aflame on his roasting stick for Allison to blow it out. “He’s been asking about you though.”
Stiles removes his marshmallows from the fire as well. “He says Coach has been unreliable and chaotic since you’ve left.”
You bite the inside of your cheek, “Because I’m his TA?”
“He may be your superior, but that man is hopeless without you,” Scott laughs, “I honestly don’t know how Coach has kept his job as long as he has.”
Stiles is preparing two s’mores beside you, layering a graham cracker and chocolate with golden brown marshmallows. You are picking at your unbandaged fingers terribly.
Scott and Allison are preoccupied with feeding each other sticky s’mores while you stare into the dancing flames of the fire. You wince at a sharp pain. Looking down you see your fingers have pried a sliver of skin from around a nail. It stings being exposed to the nighttime air and a blossom of blood speckles the tender skin beneath.
A large hand enters your vision – long fingers reaching for yours. He pulls your injured hand away and inspects the bandages on your fingertips. He places a readymade s’more in your palm. “What’s happened to Isaac isn’t your fault,” he says quietly, “Neither is Coach being manic – that’s nothing new.”
You watch his hand pull away, fisting in his lap as if regretful to touch you without your permission.
Taking a deep breath, you look at the perfectly cooked s’more, “Man, there weren’t even coals yet,” you say with mustered warmth. “This looks amazing.”
You catch him staring at your smile. The tiredness is evident in his look, but the fondness that warms his eyes is undeniable. He holds his hands together like he fears they’ll move for you if he didn’t.
The gooey marshmallow sticks to the sides of your face as you eat. It’s exactly how you like it, and you can’t help giggling at the sticky sweetness melting on the chocolate.
Stiles is watching you with something sad and sweet in his face.
“Thank you,” you say, cracker crumbs littering your lips. “You didn’t have to make me one.”
“I wanted to,” he says in return. “I wanted to see if that marshmallow would stay on the cracker or not.”
You snort with a full mouth. Bits of sticky fluff are on most of your fingers and stuck to your cheeks. You flick your fingers, seeing how some of the marshmallow was gripping the fraying fibers of your band aids.
“Oh, shoot,” you shake a hand free of crumbs. “I’ll be right back.”
As you rise from your chair, Stiles grips the arms of his – like he was about to stand with you. His eyes follow you all the way to the back door.
Scott clears his throat loudly and Allison nibbles the marshmallow from her fingers.
“What?” Stiles questions, still on the edge of his seat.
Scott wiggles his eyebrows, “You know what.”
Allison licks her lips and nods toward the house, “Take the chance.”
“Ah… god.” Stiles slips out of the chair, tripping on his way to the house. He opens the door and spies you starting to open new band aids at the kitchen counter.
 “Oh!” you say sharply, “Hey – everything okay?”
“Um…” his throat was suddenly very dry, “I just – wanted to see if you needed help.” He walks to the counter and sees the pile of marshmallow coated band aids. “I know it can be hard to… wrap those on your fingers by yourself.”
You feel shy, hesitant to display your fingers, “That… that’d be nice, thank you.”
He ignores how your hands shake, unwrapping a band aid and picking a finger with raw skin around the fingernail. Some were scabbed over, and others were still wet with exposed, tender skin.
He’s soft in how he holds your hand, gently wrapping the band aid. “I’ve never seen you pick at your fingers before.”
“Me neither,” you say quietly, “I guess it’s just a new nervous habit.”
“What was making you nervous?” he asks just as quietly. He keeps his gaze on your hands, his own oddly cold against yours.
It leaves you free to look at his face without fear. You never noticed how thick his eyelashes were. You suspect they frame his bronze eyes well, especially when they were well rested. He also has a constellation of moles across his face.
You were tracing them with your eyes as you say, “I guess I was feeling guilty again for losing my memory. It sounds like people need me… the old me.”
I need you, Stiles thinks, upset at how the guilt was presenting itself in you. “But none of it is your fault.”
“That doesn’t stop the fact that lots of problems would be solved if I could just remember.”
“I’m sorry,” he says with hidden emotion, “I… I could’ve… if I had just stayed with you…”
Your brows knit as he applies a third bandage. “It’s not your fault either, Stiles. We’re both doing the best that we can.”
He clenches his jaw, “Maybe we should put band aids on all your fingers so you’re not tempted.”
You snort, “Thank you for helping me.”
Stiles smiles and again you’re struck by another one of his features. Stiles is cute, you think, he’s really cute. “You’re welcome,” he says.
He holds your hands for a second before lifting them to his lips. He kisses each of your bandages in a chaste, silly way. “Make-it-better kisses,” he says almost dreamily – remembering a past memory, “Your specialty.”
You’re stuck on the way his mouth hovered over each of your fingers. “You learned well, apparently.”
“You’re basically cured,” he smiles again, though it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Make-it-better kisses are a medical miracle, so they say.”
You nod slowly, “Maybe I just need a couple more of those to get my memory back.”
Stiles’ eyes blow wide, “Oh… oh my god – that’s not what I… I didn’t mean to insinuate – I mean, not that I’d be upset to do… ah, shit, I’m messing this up.”
Giggles are falling out of you faster than Stiles is running his mouth. “Stiles, I was meaning a forehead kiss. Help fix my brain.”
He lets out a loud sigh, “Of course – of course that’s what you meant.” He’s jerky and hesitant and terribly endearing as he leans over to place an awkward kiss to your temple.
~~~
The jeep stops with a jolt in front of the sheriff’s station. Through the blinds Stiles and Derek see a woman behind the counter.
Somewhere in the holding cells is Isaac, being held on suspicion of his father’s murder.
“Okay, now the keys to every cell are in a password protected lockbox in my father’s office,” Stiles says. He grits his teeth, “The problem is getting past front desk Westbrook.”
It was Angela on duty, filling out her part on police reports behind the counter.
“I’ll distract her,” Derek says nonchalantly.
Stiles freaks, “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” he grabs Derek’s leather jacket, “You? You’re not going in there.”
Derek looks at the hand on his jacket like it might be his next snack.
“I’m taking my hand off,” Stiles says quickly. “That is Angela Westbrook in there – you can’t just ‘distract her.’” He uses air quotation marks.
“Sure, I can.”
“She’s married!”
Derek shrugs, “And I’m charming.”
“You’re a criminal!”
“I was exonerated.”
Stiles licks his lips, “You’re still a person of interest, and trust me, Westbrook is the last person you want to mess with. She almost always hangs up when I try to call the station.”
“That’s because you’re a hyperactive, overexaggerated teenage boy and I’m…” he adjusts his collar, “A handsome innocent person of interest that looks really good in leather.”
The look of acceptance in Stiles’ face was laughable. He couldn’t deny any of those points. “Fine. Try and charm her and see what happens.”
They wait as another police officer appears to talk to Angela, looking like they were about to head home for the night. It’s the opportunity Stiles needs to talk to Derek about one more tiny favor.
“So with me helping with this whole Isaac fiasco… I was thinking maybe you could do something for me.”
Derek whips his head over, “Excuse me?”
“A favor for a favor.”
“You know I could just walk in, knock everyone out, and break into that lockbox, right? I don’t actually need you.”
Stiles lifts his hands in protest, “You do if you want to remain an innocent person of interest!”
Derek stares him down uncomfortably, “What favor?”
~~~
The new spring rain was finally here, starting with a light sprinkle. You are on the couch, your favorite forest green blanket over your socked feet. Oliver is snuggled on your lap, enjoying the way your stomach rocked him back and forth with your breaths.
Angela sits with you, warming her hands on a mug of tea she brewed for you. “Chamomile and lavender,” she says.
You sigh, “Good for stress.” You give her a knowing look, paired with a smile.
“And sleep,” she says, “I’ll probably pass out in about ten minutes.” She laughs and then clears her throat, “You know, there was something super strange that happened at the station the other day.”
“What was it?” you ask, excited that your mom wanted to share about her workdays again. She had been worried about putting stress on your heart by telling you those stories.
She looks worried now, “It was a little chaotic.”
“Please, mom,” you say, “We haven’t just talked in a while.”
Angela seems to agree, taking a big gulp of her tea. “Well, we had a boy in holding for a murder – no, I won’t tell you who. And Derek Hale came in to talk to me.”
“Hale,” you mutter, “Wasn’t that the name of the family whose house…”
“Burned down, yes,” Angela says, “And while he was there, the boy broke out of holding and an officer I’ve never seen before was knocked out on the ground.” She shakes her head, “I have no idea how any of that happened on my watch. The poor officer had an arrow in his leg and everything.”
“Oh my god, from what?” you ask with pursed lips.
Angela shrugs her shoulders, “The Sheriff is looking into it, but I’m not sure. His son was by the holding cells when he got there.”
“That Stiles guy?”
She nods, suddenly looking at you with warmth – a question in her eyes. “That’s right. He’s a good kid. A strange one, but good.”
“Did you…” you start to say, “Did Stiles and I hang out a lot?”
Angela swallows, “You did. He thought we couldn’t hear all the times he climbed the garden trellis,” she smirks, “But your father and I aren’t that dumb.”
You scoff in surprise, “He climbed the front of the house?”
“A couple times,” she replies, finishing her tea, “He’s not exactly the most graceful person. It’s easy to hear him struggle up the vines and fall through your window.”
You laugh, “And you never thought to stop it?”
“Your dad considered it,” she says, pausing to hear the rain fall heavier on the roof. “But we knew you kids were fine. He might be a bit of a troublemaker, but I know he wouldn’t do anything to put you intentionally in harm’s way.”
Squinting your eyes, you suddenly gasp, “Oh my god, you approve of him, don’t you?”
Angela shrugs again, “Maybe.”
“You’ve never liked any boys I’ve brought over.”
“I think your dad still needs a little convincing,” she says, “But Stiles will win him over eventually.”
“I didn’t realize…” you say, flinching as thunder crashes overhead.
Angela shivers, “Well, that’s my cue for a nap.” She stands and stretches, “Warm tea, cozy bed, and rain in the background? Don’t expect me to wake up anytime soon.”
You laugh, “I’ll be here reading. Thank you for the tea, mom.”
“No problem, sweetie. I wish I could start on that garden, but the recommended time frame is the end of April,” she rolls her eyes, “My herbs are suffering in their little pots!”
You smile as she retreats up the stairs. The rain was really coming down now, pelting the roof like a hail of bullets. You always loved the sound of rain. Maybe it was the cliché book reader in you, but the weather gave the perfect conditions for a reading session.
Ollie sleeps soundly on your lap as you pick up your latest read. It was strange coming home to see a bookmark in a book you didn’t remember. It still sits on your nightstand, hopefully to be picked up again should your memories return.
In the meantime, you begin to read a new fantasy trilogy.
The rain and thunder continue for another half hour, Oliver choosing to sleep on an overturned pillow beside you. He snuggles his face into his fluffy tail as you read. You were just starting to feel sleep tugging at your eyelids when a firm knock came on the front door.
You close your book, apprehensive as the last time someone knocked on the door, the new principal sat you down to question your current whereabouts.
But you find that it was someone new. A tall handsome man with light eyes stands on the porch, sprinkled with rain.
He wipes the water dripping into his eyes, “Hey, (Y/N).” He looks up at the ceiling as if listening for something, “Can I come in?”
“I’m sorry, who are you?” you ask, shocked that this handsome man knew you by name.
“I’m Derek,” he says, pushing his way in and standing beside the piano.
You follow by quietly closing the door, afraid to wake your mom. One of the men involved in the strange chaos that happened at the police station was currently in the sitting room.
“Like Derek Hale, Derek?”
“You remember me?” he asks with confusion in his brow.
You fold your arms, “I remember your name on one of my mom’s police reports years ago. About a house fire.”
He clamps his mouth shut and nods. “Listen, Stiles and Isaac have been talking about you – asking me for favors.”
You remember your friends talking about an Isaac. “Okay?”
“I told them it might not even work, but alphas are usually the ones best apt to do it.”
“Do what?” you ask, arms tightly wound and your feet rooted to the spot. You are starting to get a pit in your stomach. Thunder is roiling outside.
“Just… jog your memory a little bit.” He takes a step forward and you suddenly find the ability to move backward as far as the room would let you.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” you say quickly, “I don’t even know you!”
Derek holds up his hands, “You need to calm down. Your heart is stuttering all over the place.”
“Yeah, it does that,” you say angrily, fear overtaking you, “Especially when strangers threaten to do something to jog my memory.”
“It’s just some minor memory manipulation,” he says, shrugging his shoulders, “I haven’t really done it to extract memories out of someone else before, but it can be done.” He approaches your body pressed against the wall, “You need to hold still though – I don’t want to damage your spinal cord.”
You gape your mouth, “What the hell do you mean!?”
He takes ahold of your neck and you’re on the brink of a scream when he covers your mouth with his other hand. “I need you to stand still.” And he sinks his claws into the back of your neck.
You flinch and gasp behind his hand. Something sharp punctures the nape of your neck, heat trickling down from the top of your head to your spine. You feel a strange twinge of electricity and it makes you shiver.
A picture was filling your mind, crisp and warm as you close your eyes to see it better.
It was you in a pale yellow dress, bows in your hair, and your hand held tightly in Tom’s fingers. Judging by how you had to crane your neck to see his tall figure, you had to be about four years old.
Another warm image appears: dirty carrots being pulled from smelly earth. Your mom claps her soil stained gloves, proud of the garden you planted together. Little you was just as excited, taking a bite out of the carrot and grimacing at the gritty taste of dirt.
One memory flows in, a tinge of cold on the edge of this one. Like you found a cold spot in a pool of water. You were finishing a homework page your mom made on algebraic equations. A bitterness was in your chest at not being able to do it in an actual school.
Your mom appears to place a stapled packet of papers in front of you. You curiously pull the first page towards you and the top reads: ‘Beacon Hills Memorial Hospital – Job Application.’ You squeal and launch yourself into a hug with your mom.
The next memory that tries to surface isn’t as warm as the others. And it doesn’t flow in as easily. You start to get a headache as a cold image swims into view. A jeep driving through the woods.
“I don’t get out much.”
He laughs, “Then why the sudden change?”
“I felt like it.”
“Woman of many words,” he smirks.
You flinch, the memory crumbling into something new – just as cold and difficult to resurface as the other one. A movie was playing in the background and a steaming meal was on plates in front of you.
He was describing a different meal to you, “It was a masterpiece.”
“Sounds amazing,” you say, moving your plate, “Like a fancy kid’s meal.”
He laughs, “That’s what it was! When I was little the only thing I would eat was kraft mac and cheese with chicken nuggets. She was determined to make me a better version.”
“I would’ve liked to have met her,” you say softly, “She sounds like an amazing person.”
“She was,” he says quietly, “She would’ve thought you were sweet.”
Pain pulses in your temples as floods of memories try to pry through your vision. It was like trying to yank sharp rocks through a rubber hose. But the next memory appears with a slight warmth.
Your chest was fluttering with desperate breaths.
“And what do you feel?” he asks.
“My heartbeat,” you say, tightening your fingers around his, “Your hand. And the cracking spray paint.” It was getting easier to breathe as you open your eyes to look at him.
You can see your initials drawn on his cheek with blue paint. He looks concerned as his thumb starts to rub along the inside of your knee.
Stiles, you think. That’s Stiles!
A burst of freedom surges through your head – like a lock being broken. You start to remember everything in between these colder memories. They start to warm with recognition.
Stiles is rambling, “… and I wasn’t sure how you felt about me being close when you weren’t in some kind of distress from your heart because so far the only times I’ve touched you has been when you were about to faint or your heart is racing or you just went through a traumatic ordeal, and seeing as being drunk and having a breakup bonfire with your friends is none of those things… I thought maybe you’d be mad at me for, you know… touching you.”
You smile as he gets even more adorably endearing, “I’m not mad, Stiles.”
He still looks ashamed, whispering, “Okay.”
“I would tell you if I didn’t like how you were touching me.”
He whips his head to you, his throat bobbing.
Your eyes start to prickle with tears. How did you not realize how much this boy was into you? The signs were all there.
“Get in the bed, Stilinski,” you mumble, already soothed by his woodsy honey scent. You breathe it in deeply, loving how he apologizes as he gets under the sheets. You relish in his awkward avoidance of your limbs, “It’s fine, Stiles,” you laugh, “We’re bound to touch being this close.”
He swallows hard, staring at the ceiling like avoiding your gaze would save him from the heat encompassing his heart. It was making his cheeks burn.
“Goodnight,” you mumble.
He bites the inside of his cheek, “Goodnight, (Y/N).”
Tears are filling your eyeline, a drop racing down your cheek as the distant, cold memories are fully back in focus. The pain in your head was growing, but it was worth it to remember all this. The fact you didn’t notice Stiles’ feelings sooner was putting a pool of guilt in your stomach. The poor boy was being so terribly obvious now that you saw the scenes again in your mind’s eye.
He smells like candy, you think.
Your lips fall into an easy pattern. He moves his hands to the small of your back to remove any more space between you. Your noses brush and press into cheeks as you kiss.
He hums deep in his throat, and it sends a shiver down your spine. He places two quick kisses along your jaw and lands on your neck, right beneath the bend in your jaw. Your head falls back as he leaves chaste kisses there too.
“Is this good?”
You laugh with your eyes still closed, tears actively falling down your face. It was good, you remember. So good you actually have a crisis in thinking you might’ve made a mistake. You were in denial of any feelings you had for him.
Even when Allison and Lydia questioned you before the dance.
Your mind swims to the desired memory that you had forgotten. Projected stars fill the space as the band plays a soft song. You hold onto Stiles in a beautiful starry dress. You’re hidden from him as you’re pressed together, swaying to the music.
You wonder if that’s part of the reason you two have courage to talk. Neither of you were looking.
“What else?” you ask with a puckered brow. A warmth you now know to be likeness enters your chest.
He grips your sides, “I like… being this close to you. And smelling that wonderful fruity stuff on you.”
You laugh, “You’ve said that before.”
He smiles, “I like you in this dress. I like that your scars are out. I like the fact you came without a date because I get to dance with you like this. And I like knowing you’re smiling right now without me needing to look because I can feel it against my cheek.” He pulls away to see proof of that smile. “I like you, (Y/N). Like a lot.”
Your cheeks start to feel itchy with salty tears, a quiet sob making your breath stutter.
“Like a lot a lot.”
Before watching the aftermath of that dance play out in your mind, you force yourself to the present. Claws rip out of your neck, and you wince, wiping at the tears that had dripped down your chin.
“How…” you sniffle, “How did you do that?”
Derek looks serious, searching for side effects in your crying, “It’s just something werewolves can do.”
“Never heard of that one before.” You cover another sniffle with a laugh, “Thank you,” you say, “Thank you.” You jump on him, wrapping your arms around his neck.
He’s frozen for about three seconds before placing his hands gingerly on your back, “You’re welcome.”
You’re on your tiptoes to reach him, but it’s the perfect height to hide your face in his chest, “He was so devastated when I didn’t remember.” You recall Stiles when he first saw you in the hospital, “He has to be so upset.”
“He’s miserable,” Derek says gruffly, pulling you away. “I need you to fix him. I didn’t think he was capable of being any more annoying.”
Your smile suddenly drops, “I never got the chance to tell him.” Your hands fly to your hair, completely ignoring the pain still pulsating in your temples. “I went to find Lydia before I…”
Derek raises his eyebrows, “Before you…”
You look at him with red eyes, “Derek this is so important. I need a ride. Please!”
~~~
The rain is in full force behind you, providing a backdrop to your panting silhouette. Just traveling from Derek’s car has you soaked in rainwater. The sleek black car drifts away under the cover of thunder.
You’re shaking terribly, water dripping from your hairline and down your face. The porch at least gives you some cover while you wait. It was ridiculous. You left the house in such a hurry, you hadn’t thought to change.
You wear comfy sage green pajamas, matching with little white daisies on them. A sunflower yellow knitted cardigan lays wet and heavy over your shoulders. One sleeve is dangling further down your arm than the other.
Anxiously you check that the police cruiser is absent from the driveway. Then you hear the door creak open.
Stiles is there in dark blue loungewear himself. It brings out the purple circles under his eyes.
“(Y/N)?” the dull expression in his face suddenly changes to one of deep concern, “What are you doing here? Did you walk in the rain?” He’s reaching for your cardigan, wishing to pull you into the shelter.
But he hesitates – not knowing if it was okay to touch you so forwardly. Not knowing if you’d find it a violation that a near stranger lays his hands on you.
It breaks your heart.
“I need to talk to you.”
He blinks, hand falling to his side, “Yeah, of course.” He opens the door further and ushers you in. “You must be freezing.” He jumps to find a towel to cover your shivering figure.
You’re pulling the wet cardigan off when he returns with a giant fluffy towel. He sees the straps of your pajama top and immediately averts his eyes, wrapping the towel around your shoulders. He rubs up and down your arms for about two seconds before catching himself again.
He takes three steps back, rubbing at his face harshly. “What do you want to talk about?”
You aren’t sure if the tears ever stopped since regaining your memories; it was too hard to discern what was from the rain and what was from you. But you look at Stiles now with a deep warmth in your chest.
It was so large and so warm it was constricting your lungs. Looking at him was making it hard to breathe. “Are you not sleeping?”
He clenches his jaw, “I try to sleep as much as possible. It’s probably not very restful sleep,” he runs a hand over his shaved head, “But… it’s nice to dream.”
You want to touch his face, touch the circles beneath his eyes. “There’s something I forgot to tell you. I completely forgot and then there just wasn’t any time to.” You hold the towel around your shoulders, taking a few steps toward him.
He looks scared, his throat bobbing as you approach.
“That night at the dance,” you start, “We were on the dance floor, and you were saying such wonderful things.” You shiver, “And I was afraid to admit the things I was feeling.”
Stiles’ eyes were growing wide. Wide and desperate. They were silently pleading with you. The very air surrounding you two seemed to be sucked out. A hitch is in your chest as you continue:
“I never got the chance to tell you… how I feel.”
His eyes were growing warm, tears lining his bottom lashes, “(Y/N)…”
“I like you too, Stiles,” you say with a proud smile. “I like you a lot.”
You watch the breath leave his lungs – like his chest had collapsed. He’s screwing up his face like he’s trying not to cry, but a tear falls anyway. “Really?”
You give a breathy laugh, voice choking on the emotion in your throat. “Really.” And you let the towel drop from your shoulders, launching yourself forward to crash your lips against his.
He stumbles back and grips your waist for support.
You stand in the entryway, holding his face and kissing him deeply. You tilt your head and make the kiss deeper; he follows a second behind you, still recovering. He’s shaking just as much as you are now.
Goosebumps erupt on your bare arms, and you pull away to look at him. Tears are smeared on both your cheeks.
“You remember?” he whispers softly, moving his hands to hold your face.
You run your hands down to his chest, “There’s this little trick with a werewolf and my spinal cord,” you shrug, unable to stop smiling. “It pulled everything back for me.”
He’s still trying not to cry, twisting his lips, “Thank god,” he gasps a sob. “Thank you god.” He pulls you in for another kiss, soft and tender this time. He wipes away the wet strands of hair framing your face.
You take a deep breath, tracing a finger up his chin to the soft skin beneath his eyes, “You really need to sleep.”
“I do,” he licks his lips, eyelashes sticking together with tears, “Just to see you.”
You take ahold of his wrists near your face, “You need real sleep.” You tug on his hands and lead the way upstairs. The rain continues to fall, accompanied by rumbling thunder. It gives you something to listen to as you enter Stiles’ bedroom.
You take a quick peek at the disarray: clothes strewn about the floor, old books open and stacked precariously on scrap paper, lacrosse equipment dirty with soil and grass piled in the hallway. The bed is scrambled like he was kicking in his sleep.
Pushing him to sit down on the mattress, you turn to move toward the dresser, but his hand clamps down on yours.
“Where are you going?”
You look back at the instant terror that envelops his face. “I’m just going to change out of my wet clothes.” You lean down to kiss his forehead, “I’ll be right back.”
At the dresser, you find a pair of plaid pajama pants and a shirt with a Doctor Who logo. In the hallway bathroom you change and comb through your hair. You’re hanging your wet clothes on the shower rod when you hear stuttered breaths coming from Stiles’ bedroom.
In a few quick steps you’re back in the room and see Stiles struggling to maintain his breathing. His eyes are still wet with tears and he’s holding his chest like it hurt. His head snaps to you when you enter, and a micro change happens in his expression – the smallest amount of relief.
You’re at his side in an instant, running your hands over his chest and to his face, “Stiles, it’s okay. I’m here and I remember. This isn’t a dream. We’re okay – I’m here.”
He nods his head, but still struggles to draw breath. He is fully panicking.
You grab the covers and pull them over you, crawling onto the bed and laying yourself over his body. Like a weighted blanket. You take deep breaths and hope he can mimic the feeling as he feels it against his torso.
One of his hands goes to your back, holding you to him. With his other, you intertwine your fingers. You pull your hands under your chin, giving them a kiss. With your head nestled into his chest, your free hand raises to be up by his pillow. You’re able to reach his short hair, running your fingers over his head in a soothing motion.
A tangle of limbs, your body holding his down, he starts to calm. He holds onto you like his life depends on it. Like if he lets go you’ll float back into his restless dreams.
It feels like hours later you both fall asleep, holding each other.
And it was the best sleep either of you have had in weeks.
~~~
Research Websites
Atrioventricular Canal Defect
Atrioventricular Canal Defect
Ventricular Tachycardia
Ventricular Tachycardia
Implantable Cardioverter-defibrillators (ICDs)
~~~
Taglist: @assassinsasha23 @tasty-book-fans @lovelybaka @the-fandom-queen @runs-with-sciss0rs @iamaslytherin0 @n3muru @bethsvrse @taylorbrooke-0912 @iloveyou2mia @everrrsincenewyork @gisellesprettylies @dullypully @taylordaughter @greenoliveslover @nataliambc @anehkael
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Text
Story Idea:
22 year old Gotham University student Danny finds a Damien clone whose near death and saves his life, offering to let the kid stay with him in his crappy apartment. The clone accepts, thinking Danny seems like a tolerable chump to bide his time with as he builds his strength for another fight with his progenitor for his rightful place as heir to Batman. Danny absolutely 100% knows the kid’s a clone and that taps right into his childhood trauma, making him want to protect him all the more. (Up to you if Dani is alive but in my version she’s not). Over time, Clone!Damien becomes begrudgingly fond of his new caretaker, especially after Danny starts taking him on Doctor Who style adventures through time/space and the tamer parts of the GZ (there are none) as part of his efforts to build up the kid’s confidence (outside his overcompensating ego) and help him learn to grow into his own person.
Bonus!
Danny and Clone!Damien are the downstairs neighbors to none other than Jason Peters (aka Jason Todd). They both clock him as Red Hood pretty quickly, but it takes much longer for them to connect him to the Waynes, so he’s kinda just their marginally more normal neighbor who happens to be a crime lord and who, for some reason, tends to check up on them a lot. (Originally this was because RH thought Danny might be an upcoming villain, then because he didn’t understand how Danny was alive, and then Clone!Damien moved in and he started checking to make sure that he didn’t murder Danny in his sleep). Luckily, Jason is a fantastic cook, so they are both grateful (to varying degrees) for his nosiness. (Is this a Dead on Main situation, are they just good friends? Who’s to say? You. Or me. But probably you.)
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traincat · 7 days
Note
hey!
I recently made a post about wanting to understand the concept of Spideytorch more, and was directed to your blog! If it's not too much of an ask, could you break down their relationship for me?
Sure! I can do that. I'm going to refer back to your post just as a jumping off point -- Spideytorch is definitely, 100% a comics-based thing. Prior to the upcoming Fantastic Four MCU film, the film rights for both characters have never been held by the same company, and "crossover" films are very much a product of the MCU, although ironically Andrew Garfield did once say he wanted Michael B Jordan, who played Johnny in the 2015 Fantastic Four film, to play his Peter's love interest.
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Thank you for your service, Andrew.
But while it is comics-based, it's a very different scenario than Spideypool, where the comics are very much based on their popularity as a duo in fandom. I'm not a Spideypool fan, just as like a disclaimer, but as someone interested in the symbiotic relationship between fandom and superhero comics, Spideypool is really interesting because their popularity came first -- they got that team up comic because they were already popular in fandom, they didn't become popular in fandom because they had the team up comic. So it's a really interesting look at how fan activity influences the connections comic characters have. That's not the case with Spideytorch.
(I'm not saying one of those things is inherently better than the other, but since you mentioned Spideypool and their team up comic in your post, I thought it made for an interesting comparison.)
Peter and Johnny literally meet in Amazing Spider-Man #1, back in 1963. The two premier teen heroes of the day, they have a lot of early interaction because they played well off each other -- Peter, a broke loner, was often jealous of Johnny's fame and money, whereas Johnny bemoaned his girl problems compared to chick magnet Peter. (Johnny's girlfriend at the time literally asked him why he couldn't be more like Peter.) They're both pretty big personalities, so there was a lot of pigtail pulling in the early days, but even when they argued there was always a sense that they genuinely liked each other deep down. For Peter, who didn't have friends in the business, Johnny was someone he could rely on, and for Johnny -- who just, like, did not have friends at all until he got to college -- Spider-Man was a peer, someone he looked up to and admired.
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(ASM #3)
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(ASM #8)
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(Strange Tales Annual #2 -- this is the first appearance of Johnny and Peter's "usual place," the Statue of Liberty. Iconic.)
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(ASM #19)
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(ASM #127)
As Johnny and Peter grew up, the frequency of their team ups faded a little, but their lives have always intersected. In some ways, they've run in parallel. They went to college at the same time, got married at the same time. (Peter's marriage was solid until he sold it to the devil; Johnny's faltered after a decade because sometimes you think you marry someone but they're actually a shapeshifting alien from outerspace who was sent to kill your family. Peter is one of the very few people who Johnny told about that in the aftermath.) Peter unmasked to Johnny, told him his identity, one of the very few people he's done that for. When Johnny "died" (he got better), he left Peter his place on the Fantastic Four. And then, when Johnny came back from the dead, the first person he saw on the other side was Peter.
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(FF #1)
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(ASM #657, titled Torch Song)
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(Fantastic Four #601)
They've lived together, fought together, shared their lives with each other. They trust each other, bone deep, despite their squabbles and differences. It's always been a love connection, however you define that love. It's a connection that has existed from 1963 until today, across multiple fictional universes and continuities. For me, the appeal of them has always been not just their chemistry but also their history.
Also they're just a lot of fun.
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(FF #17)
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(Fantastic Four v5 #14)
I have a long list of important comics for them in chronological order here, if you want to read more: https://traincat.tumblr.com/post/123691883369/so-ive-only-recently-gotten-into-spidertorch
I hope that helps clear up the history a little bit!
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sanjisboyfie · 9 months
Text
one piece smau: dating sabo edition
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liked by sabosbf, kokoala, and 10k others
[name]sblondie: this is exactly why im always late to work
tagged: sabosbf and d.dragon
sabosbf: DONT TAG YOUR BOSS????? HES GONNA FUCKING KILL ME??????
-> kokoala: LMFAOAOOA
-> sabosbf: i'm fuckin scared what is going on koala
d.dragon: This is hardly an acceptable reason to be late to work, Sabo.
-> [name]sblondie: boohoo just say youre sad and single
-> divaiva: SABO you're so dead.
freeluffy: cuddling is worth it
[liked by d.dragon, kokoala, and 200 others]
-> kokoeala: just heard dragon-san gasp in his office hold on u might be saved
-> [name]sblondie: thankgodthankgodthankgod
-> freeluffy: huh?
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liked by [name]sblondie, divaiva, and 18k others
sabosbf: he's urethral guys idk
tagged: [name]sblondie
[name]sblondie: i think you're urethral too baby
-> sabosbf: i love u i knew u would get my humor
-> [name]sblondie: of course i would my love <333
portgasace: no fucking way u two are real
dni_nami: something is telling me theres something wrong with the caption, but lemme not
-> sabosbf: what's wrong with it :0?
-> dni_nami: ....
divaiva: u two are the cutest (please change that caption, i'm telling you this out of the kindess of my heart)
[liked by kokoala, portgasace, and 140 others]
-> [name]sblondie: my boyfriends caption is perfectly fine
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liked by [name]sblondie, sabosbf, and 19k others
portgasace: barfed in my mouth i hate them
tagged: [name]sblondie and sabosbf
[name]sblondie: be nice to ur brother in law damn
-> freeluffy: [NAME] IS OUR BROTHER IN LAW NOW !?!?!?!?
-> [name]sblondie: future* brother in law my bad
-> freeluffy: booooo :(
sabosbf: yeah i hate u too ace, the only rzn u ever go out w us is so u can leech off our wallets
-> portgasace: thats a fuckign lie asshole
-> sabosbf: BROKE ASS
[liked by [name]sblondie, freeluffy, and 100 others]
boahancock: luffy's brother and luffy's brothers boyfriend are so cute <3
-> [name]sblondie: damn she don't even know our names
-> portgasace: professional luffy dickrider (for some rzn)
kokoala: my favorite gays <3333
-> [name]sblondie: ?????
-> sabosbf: thank u koala ;)
-> [name]sblondie: ???????
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liked by sabosbf, portgasace, and 20k others
[name]sblondie: guys do u think he loves spiderman more than me
tagged: sabosbf
sabosbf: if peter parker hit my line, im sorry
-> [name]sblondie: ????????
sabosbf: his theme song is my ringtone for u so i guess it connects?
-> [name]sblondie: YOU GUESS???
-> sabosbf: that just means ur my spiderman baby >///<
-> [name]sblondie: DONT TRY TWISTING THIS IN A COMPLIMENTARY WAY U JUS CONFIRMED THAT IM UR SECOND CHOICE
kokoala: spiderman >>>> any other man
-> sabosbf: u get me koala ughhh
portgasace: good taste [name], gooooddd tasteee
-> sabosbf: hehe
-> [name]sblondie: WHAT THE FUCK????????? STOP FLIRTING WITH OTHER MEN RIGHT NOW???
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liked by [name]sblondie, divaiva, and 16k others
sabosbf: got jumpscared by this pic in my cameraroll pls someone buy this guy brown contacts
tagged: [name]sblondie
[name]sblondie: me looking at u when u wake up 🧿🧿
-> sabosbf: its ok babe jus please maybe think about blinking a little bit longer
kokoala: cannot hold a conversation with him without feeling like hes thinking about murdering me
-> portgasace: what i said
divaiva: nooo you'd ruin his natural beauty :<
-> [name]sblondie: thank u iva <3
-> [name]sblondie: YOU JUST VENMOED ME 40 BUCKS WITH THE MSG "listen to [name]" ???
-> sabosbf: LMFOAOA babe don't actually buy contacts i love ur eyes theyre pretty :3
d.dragon: They are quite terrifying.
[liked by kokoala, divaiva, and 90 others]
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liked by sabosbf, kokoala, and 19k others
[name]sblondie: boyfriend appreciation post because even though hes got a weird sense of humor, hes still mine (...i guess)
tagged: sabosbf
sabosbf: HEHEHE he loves meeeeee
sabosbf: ok why that ugly ass photo of me as the second one what the hell is wrong w u u just hate me
sabosbf: I LOVE U SABO, LOVE UUU
-> [name]sblondie: love u too handosme (...i guess)
-> sabosbf: STOP WITH THE I GUESS i'd choose u over peter parker anyday baby pleaseee
portgasace: not [name] picking up on me and luffy's appetite too
[liked by kokoala, [name]sblondie, and 100 others]
-> freeluffy: bigger appetite is the best appetite !
sabosbf's story
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RESTRAIN ME??? MY SEXY BOYFRIEDN IN MENSWEAR HOLY SHIT IM CREAMINNNNGGGG
[name]sblondie replied to your story: u shouldve told me sooner, i'll wear them more often now just for u babe ;)
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sciderman · 8 months
Note
Gwen Stacy was 100 gazillion percent not dead before Peter’s web reached her??? What killed her while she fell? THE AIR????
and here begins one of the more hotly debated topics in spider-man comics canon - what killed gwen stacy?
(i could make a video essay about this)
goblin says that the shock of the fall alone is enough to kill her
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and honestly, i don't think that sounds fake. like i mean, i've never been thrown off a bridge before but like, the shock of that could probably kill me. i don't think that's fake at all. i'd have a fucking heart attack mid-air. yeah.
but there is the pointed. snap.
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so, really, regardless of whether gwen was already dead or not, the snap is a reality. if she was alive or dead, it doesn't matter, so if the shock of the fall didn't kill her, the snap would've.
i kind of don't know why norman would say she was dead before the webbing reached her. it seems more in norman's diabolical brand to double down and tell peter that his webbing IS what killed gwen. but i think maybe this is another case of the writers and artists not being on the same page - same as how it's described as the george washington bridge
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but the artists didn't get the memo. that bitch is not the george washington bridge.
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that bitch is the brooklyn bridge!!
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headcanon that i guess in 616 the brooklyn bridge is called the george washington bridge. sure. why not.
i figure the gwen "snap!" thing is another instance of the writers and artists just being on distinctly different pages. there's this very funny workflow in comics where they kind of give the artist a rough outline of the plot and the final dialogue isn't actually written until the comic is pencilled so there's always, always miscommunications between the writers and artists. where the artist draws the brooklyn bridge but the writer thinks it would be fun if actually it was the george washington bridge after the fact because get it. norman loves money. but in the synopsis it didn't actually matter what bridge it was so the artist just drew whatever the fuck bridge!!
so. i think it's the same with the snap. in the synopsis it probably says "gwen dies in the fall" - artist interprets it as whiplash, and draws it so. writer has the idea that actually, it's the shock that kills her. synopsis says "dies in the fall" and it doesn't actually matter how. point is she dies! however the fuck!
i'm honestly so obsessed with the running gag in spider-man comics where you know the writers and artists are on different pages. in two separate rooms doing two separate things. rereading the comics is so funny when you know that weird workflow and you see a scene where the art is saying one thing and the words are saying another. almost like a 4kids dub.
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that's why you get such great moments such as the panel that has caused the most outrage in my activity feed. the brown/blue pants debate.
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HIS PANTS ARE BLUE!!
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crazybiaatch · 3 months
Text
I'm just gonna put some of my npmd hcs out into the world bc I have been thinking abt this musical all week and if I don’t talk abt it i Will Explode
Peter Spankoffsi
Polish Jew - ethnic, non practising.
Parents aren't around (travel/dead/lost custody) so he lives with Ted, he was originally living in Clivesdale and was shocked by the Clivesdale hate.
Moved to Hatchetfeild in the 4th grade and was immediately bullied by Max for being from Clivesdale
Had an emo phase
Ted and Paul set up playdates with Richie, Pete, and Alice so they could bond
Ruth Flemming
Lives with her autistic dad
Dad is touch adverse, Ruth's love language is touch. This is why she is so desperate to be touched.
Wannabe Discord Kitten
Plays COD - bullies everyone for sucking at it
Scarily good at English (it's the knowledge from the play)
Richie Lipschitz
ME
He was actually the "I have the power of God and Anime on my side" kid
only listens to Ops/Eds/Osts/J-Pop and Midwest emo music
If he wasn't already being bullied so severely, he would be a full blown emo
Grace Chastity
Baptist
Her parents didn't let her attend sex ed but she already knew everything from finding wattpad as a child
HATES Wattpad when we see her in the show
yknow those people who rant and rave about ao3 being full of cp and r/pe and all those other things? yeah that's her
runs a modesty outfit inspo insta account
She does actually mean well at the beginning of the show. The end is more complicated.
Max Jagerman
transmasc
WAIT GUYS DONT LEAVE IT MAKES SENSE
hypermasculine to reach his dads expectations
youngest brother (older sister at the least - also middle child brother but I'm not as sure on that)
poor
was scared of Coraline as a kid
If he was Australian he would literally just Be A Guy down here
100% makes Jagermeister jokes
Stephine Lauter
half black (duh)
CHUB
army
runs a very popular edit account
when her dad took her phone, her fans held a wake for her
horrible driver with way too much confidence
ofmd fan
was once a child on roblox scamming people for their robux
is now an adult on roblox taking dress to impress way too seriously
has written fanfiction
BONUS
Kyle is secretly a complete and utter geek and only became comfortable being geeky after Max's disappearance, he was also the only one on the team to actually mourn him when they found out he'd died (also offcier Bailey's son)
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r1ver-6 · 2 months
Text
Peter Burke holding it together for Mozzie, even telling Mozzie that he needs to look to accept Neal’s dead, (when he himself turned away almost instantly) is heartbreaking. Especially because he has to do his grieving alone in the hallway. Also that’s another level of love to keep your own emotions in check so someone else can break before you do. I don’t know why they chose to hold his breakdown until Mozzie had gone, but all I can say is CINEMA. That scene broke me. 100/10 choice.
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erinwantstowrite · 3 months
Note
Erin I have a question ⁉️
How did you start writing LoF? Like,.not writing it in general, I mean like how did you get—or learned—or studied—all the information regarding the Batfam and their backgrounds, and also about Peter and the Avengers, etc.
Currently, I'm honestly planning on writing a small fiction about Peter ending up in Gotham (You must know your words hold a very dangerous power to inspire) but unfortunately, I don't have the right information to actually START writing it TT_TT. Do you have any tips on how I can start?
(P.S Apologies if this sounds a little confusing, I am not entirely the best at explaining 😞🤞)
There's one person to blame for getting me into DC, and it's @alighterwood
I've always been a fan of Spider-Man. He was my first hero, I wanted to be him soooo bad. I had gotten around to sort of writing my own fic for it with my own version of Peter around last year? (Very much inspired by ITSV, LoF Peter came about because he's his own universe and is based on Spider-Man lore from multiple media versions). I had never thought about writing a Spider-Man fic until ATSV, but at the time I was pretty much dead set on rewriting VLD. I got inspired after rewatching ITSV and then watching ATSV.
But it wasn't until alighterwood got me reading their favorite Batfam fics (specifically Tim) that I started to enjoy Batfam or DC in general.
(My favorite Batfam fic is "The Lone Ranger Never Had to Deal with Bruce Wayne" )
From there I started branching out into learning more about Batfam, what is and isn't fanon, and forming my own opinions. It was a natural progression into "I want my favorite characters to meet each other" and alighterwood's evil genius plan ended up working.
I've read a few comics (mostly the Red Robin series, because Tim was my intro to Batfam so I figured I'd start there) but most of my information?
Wikis, reddits, forums from years (a few of them from decades) ago, my father (who was a Batman fan as a kid) and his friends (my uncles, who were all DC and Marvel nerds), my own friends- basically anything I can get my hands on. If I had a question, it was (probably) answered somewhere, or there was someone else with the same question that made me feel better for not getting it. The internet has a BOATLOAD of information about both Marvel and DC.
It's a LOT of research and note taking, to be honest. I have a physical notebook where I take notes on lore so I don't forget it. I comb through fanon AND canon and I decide from there what I want and what I don't want/what doesn't work and what does work for what I'm writing.
But here's something to keep in mind: at the end of the day, you're not writing FOR anyone else. You're not out to please people who are 100% canon, all the time, nor are you trying to accommodate people who only read fanon material. You're writing for YOU. This part is fun for me, but could be very tedious for other people. I'm a little weird like that (I started writing essays for fun since I learned about them in school).
I like doing research. Like a lot of writers, I go down multiple rabbit holes a day. I start by googling a simple question that should take five minutes and then I see something and go "oh! What's this!?" and pick it up, and the cycle continues when I see something else and eventually remember that I was writing.
I enjoy the research and figuring out the balance. Because DC and Marvel do the same shit with their own works! Shit gets retconned, or they bring characters back from the dead, blah blah blah. The fun part for me IS going insane trying to figure out the Flash Family and their STUPID family tree, or learning about characters that were basically forgotten by everyone- even the writers. The best part is that since it's my fic I'm writing, I can go: "What's the most entertaining way I can use this?" And no one can stop me.
But if YOU don't enjoy that part, and you try to do it, you might lose your spark!! Your inspiration!! You might not have fun, and that's what writing is all about!! My thing is, is that basically every fan interpretation, whether they try to stick to the original source as closely as they can or not, IS FANON. And fanon is fun!!
Basically it all stems down to: it's your sandbox and you can play in there however you want to. And sometimes, people see what you're doing and they're like "Can I play too?" and you're like "Yes that'd be awesome!!"
If you find that you do enjoy the research, I think it's well worth it. It's very satisfying to put together all that work and then get a comment from someone where they say "OMG!! I know that reference!" or "I love this interpretation of this very obscure thing!!"
My advice for writing a Peter in Gotham fic is to know where YOU are starting at, before you start writing your fic. If you're a Spider-Man fan and you don't know much about the Batfam, try reading a comic about them, or find some favorite fics and base your information on that. It works vice-versa, if you know more about Batfam and not a lot about Peter.
Imagine there are two people sitting in front of you. One is a Marvel fan, the other is a DC fan, and they know NOTHING about the other comics. But they both want to hear your story where you have combined them. It's important that you don't lean too much into either side: you keep both of their interest by appreciating the details from both DC and Marvel.
The Marvel fan will be happy to see Peter reacting to a new world and situations, even if they don't know everything you're referencing. But the DC fan will be excited because you care about the place that Peter is interacting with enough to make a joke that maybe only they would get.
So: have fun, explore everywhere you want to, and get a little crazy. Don't worry too much about not knowing everything there is to know. I don't know everything about DC or Marvel either!
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