#Remus is so in love with his dumbass

[weirdtinkerbellversion]

Feb 1. Prompt: Chocolate. Word count: 161 @wolfstarmicrofic

I haven't written a microfic in over a month but I'm so bored in a night class so here we go.

Sirius is staring up at the crimson curtains around Remus’ bed, unable to sleep.

“Rem?”

Remus groans.

“Lily said that dogs can’t eat chocolate.”

“You’re not a real dog, Pads, you’ll be fine” Remus mumbles into his pillow.

“If I eat it as a human, yes, but what if I eat it as Padfoot?”

Remus opens one eye to look at his boyfriend and raises his eyebrow. “Then don’t eat chocolate as Padfoot?” he says, matter-of-fact-ly.

Sirius turns his face towards Remus, looking very guilty, and that wakes Remus up properly.

“Sirius? What did you do?”

“I had a chocolate frog as Padfoot while you were in the shower. I needed to know for sure! But now I’m too scared to fall asleep.” and Remus can hear real fear in his voice, so he pulls Sirius until he’s draped all over him.

“Here,” he presses a kiss into his hair, and Sirius can feel his smile on his head. “That way I can feel if you stop breathing in your sleep.”

[holychaossandwich666]

Guys guys

Why are you fighting about the ships??? Just make them all poly boom, problem solved. Then there's no fighting.

[hemmingsleclerc]

Worth it┃sirius black

summary: where Sirius is completely in love with James's sister, but everytime he wants to ask her on a date somehow ends up doing something embarrassing

just sirius being a dumbass in love

･˳ . ⋆ .˳⁺⁎˚ ⋆･˳ . ⋆ .˳⁺⁎˚ ⋆･˳ . ⋆ .˳⁺⁎˚ ⋆･˳ . ⋆ .˳⁺⁎˚ ⋆･˳ . ⋆ .˳⁺⁎˚ ⋆･˳ . ⋆ .˳⁺⁎˚ ･˳ . ⋆

Sirius Black, known for his confident attitude and big ego, became a totally different person when it came to Y/n Potter, James' twin sister. From the moment he first saw her on the Hogwarts Express, he fell in love with her. Her bright eyes, her laughter that echoed through the halls, and her loyalty to her friends captivated Sirius in a way he couldn't explain.

However, every attempt Sirius made to impress her seemed to end in humiliation. Whether it was tripping over his own feet, accidentally dropping a potion in Potions class while he was trying to show off, or simply forgetting his words when she stared at him or smiled, Sirius managed to humiliate himself over and over again and the marauders found endless fun in his failed attempts.

One particularly incident occurred during a Gryffindor Quidditch match. Sirius had been practicing tirelessly, determined to catch Y/n's eye with his skills as a Seeker and impress her (again). As he zoomed across the pitch during the game against Slytherin, he spotted Y/n cheering enthusiastically in the stands. Heart pounding with nerves, Sirius dove towards the Snitch, only to misjudge his speed and crash into a ring, sending the Snitch away to the opposite end of the field. The entire stadium bursted into laughter, including Y/n, who clapped a hand over her mouth, trying to stifle her giggles.

"Nice one, Pad! Maybe next time you'll catch something other than the ground," James joked mercilessly after the match, laughing his head off, slapping Sirius on the back.

Sirius tried to laugh, but inside he felt enormous disappointment and shame. He had wanted with all his might to impress Y/n, to show her that he was more than just a prankster or a reckless troublemaker. But every time he tried, it seemed like he only managed to make a fool of himself.

Despite his repeated failures, Sirius refused to give up, she was worth it and he wasn't going to give up so easily. He found himself casting nervous glances at Y/n during meals in the Great Hall, trying to work up the courage to approach her. However, every time he decided to talk to her, his tongue would get stuck and his palms would sweat. Even simple greetings turned into awkward exchanges in which Sirius would end up stumbling over his words or making some ill-timed joke that fell flat.

One rainy afternoon, Sirius was sitting in his dorm with his friends. Peter and Remus were playing a game of wizard chess nearby while James lay on his bed playing with his snitch, occasionally casting sympathetic glances in Sirius' direction.

"You know, mate," Remus began tentatively, moving a knight on the board, "maybe you should just ask her out straightforwardly. None of this grand gesture stuff. Just be yourself."

Sirius sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I've tried, Moony. Every time I try to talk to her, I end up making a complete fool of myself. She probably thinks I'm an idiot by this point."

James chuckled "Nah, she doesn't think you're an idiot. Just a bit… charmingly clumsy as she told me."

Sirius rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help but smile at his friends' attempts to cheer him up. Deep down, he knew they were right. Maybe he had been going about it all wrong. Perhaps what Y/n needed was not grand gestures or witty banter, but simply honesty.

The next day, Sirius was walking through the black lake, letting his feet walk without any direction, however he realized that he was precisely addressing Y/n who was reading a book in front of the lake. His heart raced as he made his way over, his friends watching with anticipation from a distance.

"Here goes nothing," Sirius muttered under his breath, taking a deep breath to steady his nerves.

As he approached Y/n, she looked up and smiled warmly at him. Sirius felt his legs weak.

''Hey Y/n''

''Hey sirius, what's up?''

''everythings fine, um I wanted to ask you something''

Sirius felt his throat dry and his mind went blank.

''Are you okey sirius? you seem a bit...pale'' Y/n asked doubtfully, standing up and getting closer to Sirius.

''No! I'm good don't worry!'' Sirius was actually planning on pretending to faint, or running away.

''Okey?..Well anyways I also wanted to ask you something''

Sirius was about to open his mouth to let the words out but Y/n interrupted him.

''I was wondering if you'd like to go to Hogsmeade with me this weekend?" Y/n said smiling ear to ear

Time seemed to stand still for Sirius. His eyes widened in shock, his mouth hanging open. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Did she just ask him out before he could ask her?

Taken by surprise, Sirius took a step back, his heart racing even more. To his surprise, he tripped on a tree root and fell to the ground with a thud.

Laughter erupted in the distance, echoing through the garden. James, Remus and Peter had been responsible for these as they were almost crying of laughter, unable to contain their amusement at Sirius's latest fall.

Sirius lay on the ground for a moment, his face burning with shame. He stood up as quickly as he could, trying to maintain some semblance of composure and dignity.

Y/n rushed over to him, concern mixing with her laughter. "Oh my god!, are you okay?"

Sirius nodded, his cheeks still flushed. "Y-yeah, I'm fine. Just… just caught me by surprise, that's all."

Y/n chuckled softly, offering him a hand up. "Sorry about that. I couldn't resist."

Despite the embarrassment, Sirius couldn't help but grin. "No need to apologize. I… I'd love to go to Hogsmeade with you."

Y/n smiled wildly, relief evident in her eyes. "Great! It's a date then."

Sirius felt a wave of relief and excitement. He had managed to get through another embarrassing moment, but this time he had turned out better than he could have imagined.

As they separated, the rest of the marauders approached him, still laughing at him. James patted him on the back, shaking his head in amusement and hugging him by the side and Sirius couldn't help but do a little victory dance.

Despite all his fumbles and embarrassing moments, he knew one thing for certain: Y/n Potter was worth every stumble and every awkward pause.

[writtenbymoonflower]

Stumble

James is drunk and you are easily flustered. James Potter x kinda shy!reader

cw: mentions of drinking, being drunk, swearing, slight mention of smut

806 words

You would’ve been scared of the sudden sound of your front door opening if you hadn’t heard your boyfriend's erratic giggles echoing from behind the entrance, along with someone fervently shushing him. 

“Fuck Prongs, are you trying to wake up the whole bleedin’ city?” You heard Sirius’ irritated voice. 

You rushed to the front door to see all the commotion, you knew that James had gone out with Remus and Sirius tonight, but you didn’t expect them to be home so early. 

“Oh thank fuck you’re awake.” Sirius sighed in relief, nudging your bumbling boyfriend towards you. 

“Angel! Oh Merlin, I missed you.” He flung himself towards you, nearly sending you both tumbling to the carpeted floor. You giggled despite yourself. 

“Someone had fun tonight.” You stroked the hair at the nape of his neck, feeling the light amount of sweat coating the tendrils. 

“Oh believe me, he did." Sirius said, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. "He got slightly drunk within thirty minutes and started sharing way too much information about the two of you.” Your face heated and scrunched at that, thankful Sirius chose not to share specifics. “Then he tried to order a lemonade to slow down, but the bartender thought he meant a vodka lemonade. Dumbass didn’t notice until his fourth.” Sirius cracked up, clearly finding humor at his friend's expense. 

“Oh baby,” You laughed in pity. “Thanks for getting him home, Siri.” You waved at your friend before he left, while he muttered something about can’t take him anywhere as he shut the door. 

“Y/N…” James slurred, still not letting you go. “My girl, my sweet baby girl, I missed you so much.” 

“You saw me not three hours ago, Jamie.” You said gently, trying to urge him towards your shared bedroom. He finally relented, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and side-hugging you as you both walked down the hall (you walked at least, he stumbled). 

“I know! A whole three hours without seeing this pretty face.” He tried to boop your nose but ended up just pawing at your face. “How am I supposed to thrive under these conditions? I felt myself dying, I was being drained. You’re too cute to be kept from me.” You thanked your lucky stars he was probably too wasted to notice how his words affected you. 

You were always easily flustered by James, anytime he was his usual sickly sweet self your whole body heated and you couldn’t look him in the eye. He made you feel all too exposed and all too small at the same time. Thankfully, he was a kind boyfriend and rarely used his powers to torment you (despite how much he wanted to declare his love for you every second of every day). But apparently, in his impaired state he either didn’t remember how he made you suffer or didn’t care. 

You walked through the bedroom (having to tug James away from the bed, which was very difficult considering he was both strong and dead weight), into the ensuite. 

“You’ve gotta brush your teeth, Jamie.” He whined but complied, grabbing his toothbrush and jumping onto the counter like a little kid. "Thank you." You said, being extra gentle with him in this state.

“How am I supposed to disobey when you sound so cute bossing me around?” You rolled your eyes, trying to keep from getting dizzy with affection. You put some paste onto his brush and he got to cleaning his teeth, keeping his doe-eyes on you the whole time. He brushed for about 20 seconds before jumping from the counter, spitting and rinsing his mouth. He didn’t waste any time grabbing for you. 

“Jamie, c’mon, let’s get you changed.”

“Yeah? You gonna strip me down, baby?” You stifled a pained laugh, turning to ash on the spot. “If you wanted me naked you just had to say so, you didn’t have to pretend there was another reason. Sneaky girl.” He grabbed your face in his hands and squished your cheeks, kissing your pushed-out lips. You shook him off and he quickly started undressing down to his boxers. Once he was done with that he grabbed you again. 

“Let’s get to bed.” You tried to gently lead him over but he flung you both onto the mattress. You every so gently pulled his glasses form his face, folding them and setting them on the nightstand.

“Never stop touching me, I can’t handle it.” He whined, looking deep into your eyes with enough love to make your chest burn. “You’re too pretty to let go. Way too pretty. You’re like, glowing. You always are. It’s no fair, Angel.” He grabbed your face in his hands and started kissing all over your face. 

You had a feeling the night was nowhere close to being over. 

[moonstruckme]

could you do a poly!marauders with fem reader where reader doesn’t swear at all (or like REALLY rarely) and the boys are with her and something happens and she just starts cussing like a sailor and the boys are like O: ??where??did??that??come??from??

Thanks for requesting my love! This is not based at all on anything that's ever happened to me ofc (I've never cursed even once in my life and am a very attentive driver) but it was fun to write!!

cw: near-miss car accident

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 820 words

“I can’t believe you keep the seat so far back,” you say, squinting into the rear view mirror. 

“Right?” James backs you up from where he’s gently massaging Remus’ knee in the backseat. “Moony, your height is an injustice to us all.” 

Sirius smirks out the passenger window. “I don’t mind it.” 

You laugh, glancing into the mirror to assess Remus’ countenance. He’s usually the one to drive the four of you around, but he’d woken up this morning with his knee aching and none of you had wanted to chance him getting a cramp or tweaking a muscle while he had his foot on the gas. He claims the pain isn’t bad and the rest of you are playing along, but his promises do little to reassure you. Remus’ tolerance is crazy high from years of aches, pains, and injuries, so him saying it doesn’t hurt very much is like when Sirius says he’ll be over in five minutes; he probably believes it to be true, but everyone else knows better. 

Remus’ lips are twisted slightly upward at your bantering, though, and when you scan his face for signs of tension or discomfort you don’t find any. He starts to lean onto James’ shoulder, then shoots back up, eyes widening. 

Sirius’ sharp inhale has you whipping your attention back out the windshield, where another car is trying to butt into the small space between your car and the one in front.

“Fucking fuck!” You hit the brakes and slam the butt of your hand into the horn, letting it blare until the intruding car swerves back into their lane. If you’d hit them, it would have been Sirius’ side colliding with the driver’s door. Your blood pounds in your ears. “What the hell, jackass? Stay in your own fucking lane!” You start to pass them, and the driver hastily puts down his phone, avoiding your gaze. “Yeah, how about we stay off our goddamn phones while we’re on the road? Fucking dumbass.” 

You blow out a harsh breath, refocusing on the traffic around you now that the danger has passed. The car has gone completely silent. “Oh no, Remus, did it hurt your knee when I braked, honey? I’m so sorry.” 

A beat, and then Remus clears his throat. “Uh, no.”

The tension doesn’t break. You wouldn’t blame the boys if they were still in shock from your near-miss, but the quiet is a bit unnerving. You’re fighting the urge to look over at Sirius or glance at Remus and James in the rear view mirror, not wanting to take your eyes off the road again. 

You jump when James asks, “What just happened?” at the same time as Sirius shouts “Fucking yeah, baby!” and holds up his hand for you to high-five. 

You barely brush it with your fingertips, hesitant and a bit wary. “What?”

“Dove,” Remus says hoarsely, “I’ve never heard that kind of language from you.” 

“Oh.” Your ears burn. “Yeah, sorry.” 

Sirius makes a sound that’s half startlement, half something else. You chance a look his way, and he’s grinning at you, mouth hanging slightly open. You think those might be stars in his eyes. “Don’t fucking apologize,” he laughs, sounding downright giddy. “That was great! Fantastic! I didn’t know you had this side to you, gorgeous.”

You shrink a bit in your seat, but there’s nowhere to go. You know if you check your mirror, you’ll find two more pairs of eyes staring at you from the backseat. “I don’t usually…well, you guys haven’t been around me while I’m driving before.” 

James guffaws. Sirius has begun to shake with silent laughter beside you. “Do you mean to tell me this happens every time you drive?” James asks.

“Not every time,” you say defensively. “They spooked me.” 

“They spooked you?” Sirius hoots from beside you, and now you can hear even Remus’ quiet chuckling. “Baby, I didn’t know you knew half those words! If that’s what happens when you drive, I want you behind the wheel every time.” 

“Oi,” Remus objects, but there’s no offense to be found in his tone. “It’s not like I don’t cuss.” 

“No,” James replies, reaching up to squeeze at your shoulders playfully, “but with you it’s not usually such a performance. That was a spectacle!” 

“I don’t know why you’re all so surprised,” you say, but you’re giggling now too, worse when Sirius joins in on James’ teasing, pinching at your side. “You all curse like sailors, you were bound to rub off on me eventually.” 

“It’s not like you’re not allowed to curse, dovey,” Remus says. “It’s just that we weren’t expecting it from you.” 

“And what, you’re gonna act like it’s our fault?” Sirius scoffs, poking you in the ribs and grinning when you squirm away. “As if any of us would ever say ‘fucking fuck.’ That’s an amateur's work, gorgeous. Can’t blame us for that one.” 

[ffionaapplescigarette]

sirius: why do you read muggle books anyway?

remus: what, philosophy?

sirius, *mockingly*: wHaT, pHiLoSoPhY?

remus: so i can say things like 'love, loved and shall love only you with everlasting pain and passion'.

sirius: oh

sirius: i still think philosophy is a dumbass name

remus *tired of his bs*: philosophy also taught me how to ethically kill someone

sirius: ...

sirius: now thats hot

[foursaints]

“I don’t care what [Barty] says, Dumbledore’s not stupid”: On Barty as Machiavel

i think we're all forgetting the moment where harry explicitly draws a parallel between barty & remus and i wrote the world’s longest post about it 

under a close reading, moody!barty operates in a manner that is SO distinct from canon!moody, and i think it’s made especially apparent in the way he interacts with students & the virtues he emphasizes in his lessons. even when disguised, barty has a machiavellian tendency that comes through consistently in several different moments. 

i think this quote is a weaker example, but “very tactful” is NOT something that would be used to describe canon!moody under any circumstances. c!moody’s lack of social tact is a known characteristic, and barty uses his tactless reputation to get away with his machinations (see: the dustbin excuse, breaking into snape’s office, even the ferret to an extent).

on the other hand, BARTY is clever and subtle and manipulative, and we see this coming through in how he handles neville. the biggest difference between him and c!moody is the way that barty!moody tends to openly value or praise Cleverness & Craftiness above more moody-ish virtues like bravery, loyalty, or Taking Care of His Students’ Safety… but i think the most interesting part of all this is the way that harry reacts to it.

the hp books notoriously do this clumsy thing where the morality is starkly Black/White (as ursula leguin rightfully criticized). but seemingly arbitrary categories like “gryffindor” or “slytherin” are also conflated with this strict Good/Evil dichotomy. which results in these random-ass traits like “brave 😎🦁” and “cunning 💀🐍” also taking on moral associations within the world of the text (jkr has also done this with physical traits & racial stereotypes, which is vile) 

but an overarching theme in hp is harry grappling with this dumbass in-world black/white morality & unlearning part of it (ex: snape, the epilogue w albus severus about slytherin). but i think it’s sooo interesting that one of the few characters (aside from snape & dumbledore) to demonstrate & valorize a machiavellian tendency AND be admired for it (by harry) is LITERALLY barty jr. 

like! barty’s tact is not a good thing in-canon! he uses his tact to get away with murder & torture & elaborate terrorist plots (he’s part of a group of death eaters described as having "managed to talk their way out of azkaban” p. 527) but i looove that the same trait which allows him to do all sorts of Dastardly Evil is cast as positive and remus-like in this moment. obviously i don’t think jkr was doing of this on purpose, but i love how these little things are unintentionally more compelling than whatever the hell she was trying to do with snape. and it goes deeper!!

this moment is especially telling of barty’s character, to me. subbing out the names, “I don’t care what [Barty] says… Dumbledore’s not stupid” is a CRAZY line. 

it’s lowkey THE barty!moody thesis in comparison to c!moody: nothing we’ve seen from c!moody would even remotely suggest that he’d EVER imply that dumbledore is stupid. (c!moody adopts the “it’s imperative that we blindly trust dd’s mysterious plans” attitude that most of the adults in harry’s life take, that hermione re-emphasizes here). but barty’s attitude is something that harry heavily fucks with in this moment!! 

that’s all i really have to say about The Implications or whatever. but i want to call more attention to moments in canon where barty’s tendencies shine through his disguise because (unlike most marauders characters) his personality is really fleshed-out. especially this aspect of it. my silly 

i. "mind works the right way, granger"

barty speaking about dumbledore like he’s stupid (💀) is enjoyable for several reasons up to & including how big-dicked it is of him, but most importantly i think it’s symptomatic of an overarching theme of his character. in GOF, barty has a tendency to take stock of the people around him, according to what appears to be a really concrete & consistent set of internal values: he values cleverness matched with a certain degree of ruthlessness. 

this bit with hermione is fun. there are about ~6-7 other instances where he praises cleverness, but that’s not really a unique or noteworthy thing to value? but the phrasing in this quote is my favorite. i know that it’s in reference to the skillset required of an auror, but the phrasing of “mind works the right way” can be applied to so much of barty’s character if you reach hard. i love that barty’s language almost casts the mind as something rote & mechanical which can function right or wrong. 

but anyway it only becomes interesting when placed in context of THIS earlier interaction: 

there are endless ways barty could have gone about guiding harry to use his firebolt here, so his specific phrasing holds a lot of weight to me. (keep in mind: he’s prompting harry to feel that he came up with the firebolt/accio idea, but this whole plan was concocted by barty himself much earlier. he’s on the “convince harry to do my broomstick dragon thing” step of his overarching scheme) 

in a sense, by “inspiring” harry to do what HE already independently decided was best, he’s sort of… giving away his own reasoning, a little? the italicized emphasis on enabling oneself to “get what you need” feels… unnecessary, in context? i love that THAT is where emphasis slips into his voice because it betrays his values. 

barty’s Revenge Scheme is insanely fucking convoluted, but at every stage i think that logic is there. in his villain monologue where he rehashes the deranged level of micro-managing he was doing to get harry to resurrect voldemort, at every individual step he was following his own advice. to barty, sometimes murder is just the Simplest Spell to Get What He Needs. 

according his own advice, barty sees the clearest path between two points, and generally has 0 ethical qualms about closing that distance by the Simplest means possible. he later confirms this by describing harry’s morality introducing complications as “contend[ing] with [his] stupidity” (676) 

ii. “good boy,” growled [barty]. “i can make good use of this…”

the scene where barty acquires the marauders map is CRAZYY.. for a moment, barty is so excited & taken aback that we see a few of his genuine reactions. i love that absolutely nothing manages to faze him EXCEPT genuine delighted shock over an interesting new tool he can implement in his schemes. (sidenote: he probably recognized the marauders’ nicknames, which is so funny)

that fact that we have a canonical barty crouch jr “good boy” makes me claw at the walls. anyway. i feel that i don’t need to explain how “i can make good use of this… this might be exactly what i’ve been looking for” supports characterization of barty as a scheming little machiavel because it’s pretty much explicitly stated right there. 

but this quote stands out for his genuine preoccupation with it. from the instant that barty sees the map, his eyes don’t leave it— his eye “whizzed over [it’s] surface” (491), he questions harry about how his name appeared when he searched snape’s office (”’Crouch,’ he said. ‘You’re— you’re sure, Potter?’” (491))— all while harry is sinking into a trick staircase & getting concerned that moody is ignoring him.

“penetrating glare” ← top barty rights! 

the image of him getting new information, questioning harry about it tactfully, and then spending A FULL MINUTE silently integrating it, is one of my favorite instances of him in the book… it’s like you can hear the gears in his head whirring. i like that we can see this type of assessment that he does extends to other people, when he turns it on harry and “size[s] him up”. 

AND ALL OF THIS IS WITHOUT EVEN GETTING INTO WHAT HIS LESSONS WERE LIKE

this post is long enough as it is! but all that’s left to say is that barty will always be at his most interesting when you pay attention to canon… there’s another longpost that could be written about barty!moody’s differences in disposition. the jokes he cracks, his relative lightness, and the sheer number of times he was openly like “FUCK the law i do what i want” (while literally masquerading as a literal wizard cop) are so intriguing. but that’s for another time 

[marigold-hills]

June 27: drought | @wolfstarmicrofic | word count: 480

PREVIOUS PART • NEXT PART • FIRST PART

“Love you, Moony,” Sirius says. Because he can. Because he’s allowed. Feels it like first drops of rain after a drought. Like letting it soak through the skin and drench his hair, a warm summer storm.

They’re wrapped around each other, Sirius’ head on his Moony’s chest. Each steady breath a raise and a fall. Each like a rebuilding.

“Love you too,” a hand tightening around him, lips on forehead.

Bliss, Sirius thinks, and nothing else at all. It’s quiet in his mind. He wants this moment for forever.

“We should let our two idiots back in, shouldn’t we.”

“Must we?” Sirius whines. It’s warm, comfortable. Perfect to drift off. His eyes are already closing. “I don’t want to move.”

“Can’t let them sleep on the sofas. Come on love, take down the locking charm. I’ll get them.”

Sirius burrows his head further into Remus’ chest. “Come back here, after?” Feels strangely shy asking, “sleep here with me tonight?”

Another kiss on the top of his head. “Wild horses won’t tear me away.”

Remus gets dressed – large tshirt, checkered pyjama trousers. Has already vanished the mess they’ve made and cleaned Sirius up. Sirius waves his wand to remove the enchantments.

“Leaving you in bed like this is almost impossibly hard, I hope you know,” Remus pulls him into a kiss, sweet and chaste and so loving it breaks something in Sirius’ soul.

James and Peter are half asleep when they get back in, stumbling and herded by Moony like they’re particularly awkward sheep and he a shepherd. “I want to hear everything in the morning,” James ruffles Sirius’ hair on the way to bed. “Goodnight, gentlemen. Good work today everyone,” he collapses onto his mattress and is out in seconds.

Remus climbs back into the bed, as promised. Faces Sirius, brings him into his arms. It’s the most natural thing. They might have been like this for lifetimes.

Sirius thinks don’t take this away from me. Let me have this. Let me fall asleep looking at him and wake up to his breath on the back of my neck. Nothing else I’ll ask for, just this. Just him.

They have days left in the Castle, but Sirius is no longer weary of the change. He’ll do what it takes to keep them all together. Under no impression that it will be smooth, or without issues, especially not after the last full moon: he thinks how to prepare for the next one, and for the way Moony’s body sometimes needs its time.

“You’re thinking too much for this late at night. Did I not tire you out enough?”

“Just looking forward to all the things we’ll still get to do.”

Moony holds him closer. “Hmm,” sleepily agrees, “me too. But there’s time still. Sleep now.”

So Sirius does. When he wakes up, Remus’ heartbeat is under his palm like a promise.

moon-girl88 @digital-kam @tealeavesandtrash @sweetstarryskies @alltoounwellll @hunnybeemarie @hoje--aqui @annaliza999 @hihimissamericanbi @gipitothefrog @shamelesswolfstarshipper @a-pine-cone @cosmicweeds @cocoabutterandbooks @bloodoffire @residentdisaster @shamelesswolfstarshipper @ravenwordss @prancingpony42 @themoonlovesthestars @starving-marauder-lover @weirdtinkerbellversion @deadcupcakehere @theprettieststarfr @dumbass-gryffindor1960

(let me know if you do/don’t want to be tagged in next parts)

[chaoticgaywitch]

OKAY OKAY UNHINGED IDEA- MARAUDERS MAMMA MIA AU

james is donna. harry is sophie, getting married and reading his father’s diary. he realizes that his father is lonely after james and lily amicably split because lily realized she was in love with mary. there are three people his father writes about- remus, sirius, and regulus. from the way he writes about them, harry can’t tell which one he was in love with. (this is because harry’s a dumbass. it’s very obvious.) so harry invites them to his wedding. james finds out. harry still can’t tell who’s the one his father’s in love with (but again this is solely because harry’s a dumbass. we all know james gets heart eyes every time he sees reg.) at the wedding, the usual stuff happens. harry realizes he doesn’t wanna get married, james realizes he DOES wanna get married. SIRIUS is the one who sings “take a chance” to remus.

thanks for coming to my ted talk, i’m obsessed with this actually (I MIGHT WRITE AN ACTUAL FIC???)

[lexithwrites]

Hear me out

Remus/James/Sirius started off as just guys being guys. Jerking off together. Kissing the homies goodnight. Cuddling to watch movies.

And then it turned into Remus and Sirius dating, and james being their third every now and again while shamelessly pinning over Lily, Regulus, and even Barty. Each time he got turned down he would go and pout to Remus and Sirius and they would watch a movie, cuddle, kiss, and sometimes it would end in a threesome

But the more this happened, the more Remus and Sirius fell deeper in love with James. They would complain about how oblivious he was and even question if he was just using them. But little do they know- James is just a fucking dumbass who doesn’t realize he’s also in love with his best friends.

Omg poor James getting turned down by everyone is so sad but I feel like Lily, reg and barty are well aware that he likes Remus and Sirius and that’s why they turn him down lmao the closet is glass James

I need to write a wolfstarbucks threesome and now

[patrophthia]

libraries and abs | sirius black

pairing: sirius black x reader

genre: fluff, established relationships, crack, humor, not proofread

wc: 1.7k

originally posted on wattpad

if you were to tell sirius black that one day he would be sat in a corner of the library, tutoring his girlfriend he would laugh his head off and tell you how much of a comedian you were —and yet, here he sat, in front of his (in her own self described words) dumbass of a girlfriend as he taught her all the lessons hogwarts offered.

she had barely passed her assignments, and if sirius hadn't dragged her to where they were now, sternly sat her down and began explaining all the secrets behind every magical thing she might just fail her NEWTs. but sirius was determined, no (permanent) girlfriend of his will fail her NEWTs. he will make sure that she passes the exams with flying colors if it was the last thing he did.

"this is useless! it's all going through one ear and out the other. i'm going to fail, sirius."

they were barely thirty minutes into their studies when she started whining, wanting to give up. there was just so much to be read, so many words, so many letters and they weren't as interesting as any fiction books she could've been reading as of now.

"just let me wallow in self-pity while i'm ahead."

sirius was persistent, ignoring any complains that she had made. he understood why she thought they were so many letters because good godric, there was just so many fucking words. but he was one of the brightest students for a reason, he knew the lessons through and through —despite him barely paying attention in the classes— he knew what the lesson entails and how to explain it in a way that she would understand.

"c'mon darling, just ten more minutes and we can head off to the kitchens for a little break," sirius lied through his tongue, ten minutes will turn into twenty and twenty will turn into however long it takes to guarantee her passing grades.

"love," he sighed exasperatedly, almost pleading with his words, "i talked to someone and they said this showed up on their NEWTs which means there's a chance that it will show up in ours."

this was such a far fetch thing for him to do, it was more of a remus lupin thing —or james potter even, maybe regulus black if you will, but it was certainly not a sirius black thing. the things he did for her.

"i think i know enough to get me to pass, sirius." studying had never been something she was fond of, it was either too many letters or too many numbers —or too many letters in a lessons about numbers.

it was just all so frustrating and all she wanted to do was curl up in her dorm and read about some loving relationship where the boyfriend doesn't force their girlfriend to study as if he had been the type to study at all.

"how about we go back to the dorms then?" sirius suggested, it was like he could read her mind really. she perked up at the idea, liking the thought of cuddling with sirius and joking with his best mates but before she could get even more excited, sirius quickly shot down the idea. "we can have a fifteen minutes break before we go back to studying but this time i will be asking you questions."

"if you get the answers right you get a reward."

she thought about it for a second, she could do with not getting any rewards if it meant she was able to be laying in bed. "what's the reward?"

sirius pursed his lips, a tale tell sign that he was racking his brain for an idea. finally, he answered in a questioning tone. "how does me stripping sound."

•••

"wow," sirius said with genuine surprise, leaning down to touch his ankles. "you actually got it right, i knew you could do it pretty girl."

he slipped his left sock off and tossed it towards the laundry pile before raising himself back up to look at her. there was a pout on her lips and sirius couldn't help but chuckle at it, knowing the exact reason behind it.

he had been firing questions at her for the last twenty minutes and once she finally answered a question correctly, he only took off his sock? seriously?

the only motivation she had to even be trying to answer his questions was that, he, as in the notoriously, effortlessly graceful and handsome sirius black —who also happened to be her boyfriend— would take off his shirt (or pants) so she could ogle at him, but all he took off was a sock. honestly.

"i'll give you a sickle if you make the next one easy," she said, while she rummaged through her bag, trying to find where she'd place her loose change, "then another one if you take off your shirt when i get it right."

"and have you see my beautiful abs at the low low price of a sickle?" he asked incredulously, "honestly woman, what do you take me as, your boyfriend or a hot bod walking around for your entertainment?"

"you're not a hot bod walking around solely for my entertainment?"

sirius' jaw dropped, a look of offense on his face and frowned; the kind that had her biting her lips in an attempt to hide her smile. his bottom lip was slightly jutted out flatteringly, his eyes pathetically wide that reminded her nothing short of a puppy.

"do you not love me?" and then he added with full flares of dramatics. "am i just good looks to you?"

"yes," she answered quickly, jumping on the opportunity at distracting him with banter rather than studying, "it's always been about your looks."

"and frankly, i find it quite rude that you use your sex appeal against me."

"how am i exactly using my sex appeal against you, my love?" he asked, amusing her. sirius got up from his seat at his desk and moved towards where she laid on his bed. "please do go into details."

she hesitated, feeling her breath quicken as he leaned over her. noticing the slight shift in her posture, face growing rigid underneath his gaze, sirius smiled tauntingly. merlin, he loved the effect he still had on her despite the long amount of time they'd been together. "are you nervous, doll?"

doll? that was certainly a new one. with a sly nod of her head, sirius' grin widened. "why's is that?"

why is she nervous? HAS HE SEEN HIMSELF?

"i have actually," sirius snorted, grey eyes twinkling with a sort of mischief. "i put all my effort to look like this for you. i'm all yours, darling."

"you know, if it weren't for the fact that you're only wearing one sock, all my clothes would be off right now."

at that sirius chuckled, his head thrown backwards, overgrown curls brushing behind his shoulders. once he finally gathered himself, sirius smiled sweetly at her, pressing a chaste kiss on her lips before pulling back. "almost forgot why i'm one sock down in the first place."

"now back to where we were." sirius sat up, reaching for the book on his desk. he let out a low laugh at her desperate groans, not wanting to spend a single more minute studying. "i'll be kind to you, princess. this one is easy."

"okay," she murmured reluctantly, maybe easy meant he would take his shirt off (or his pants), "shoot."

"what are the— get your nasty paws off of me, woman!" sirius exclaimed, a look of horror on his face as he smacked her prying hands away from his sweats, "try to keep it in your pants will you?"

"you want me to keep my hands in my pants?" she asked, giggling slightly at the unintentional rhyme.

"no, that's not— you're distracting me again, you minx," he grumbled, "stop it! i need to get your grades up! i can't let our kids be stupid because of you."

"kids?" she repeated questioningly, watching as his face flushed up at the realization of his own words. "what makes you think i want to have babies with you?"

"you quite literally tried to rip my pants off, i'm sorry if i jumped into any conclusions," he quipped, ears still tinged red from embarrassment. it was endearing really, knowing that the famous smooth talker, sirius black, was flustered by her. "can we go back to what we were doing please?"

"and what were we doing, sirius?"

"trying to prevent you from not getting a job."

"what if i don't want a job?"

"nobody wants a job," sirius stated, "but they get one anyways so they wouldn't have to live off of the streets."

"you're from the black family." she pointed out the obvious. "aren't you guys rich? can't i just be your trophy wife or a sugar baby? i can do both."

"wow," sirius blew out, "you want me for my good looks and my money, what else? you're only dating me because you want to get with my father?"

"i mean . . ." she trailed off, watching as sirius grey eyes grow wide, "you are half your father which means you got your good looks from him. if i had been going out with you just to end up with your father —and the keyword is if— then i would get the money and good looks directly from the source."

"you disgust me, [f/name]."

"i do?" at his aggressive nods, she smiled. "then why are you holding my hand?"

"i have my reasons," sirius said sternly before going back to the book on his lap.

—from bee: BOYFRIEND SIRIUS IS MY LOVEEEEE!!

[spiritstar477]

I’m thinking of writing a fic where Sirius gets amnesia (unknown how as of yet) and such. Modern muggle au. I want it to be a pretty chill, happy story with probably not much plot just vibes.

Wolfstar as the main coupling.

These are my character descriptions for our marauders era peeps. Any ideas on any changes or additions to them?

See below the break ⬇️

Also, Sirius isn’t listed bc he doesn’t know who he is bc of the amnesia.

Remus: gay, five years old was attacked by Greyback and cut up, gets tremors on chronic pain now, uses a cane to walk, nerd (will read anything but mostly loves textbooks/educational books), lowkey autistic (you don’t know til you know), always spouting weird facts when he’s uncomfortable, obvi super pining for sirius

James: pansexual, dating Regulus, plays basketball, does one on one with Marlene and they gossip/vent about their day, works out all the time, super smart but a dumbass, actual sunshine with abandonment issues

Regulus: trans (formerly Lyra), bisexual, dating James, nerd (big into learning like remus, he and remus hang out to learn random shit together) plays badminton singles, autistic af, very quiet until he gets comfy then he never shuts up, likes legos (touch and you’ll die)

Peter: aroace, everyone’s bestie, chill and just living his best life, closest with Mary (both just chill but always judging everyone together)

Barty: gay af, dating Evan obvi, graffiti vandal/lowkey arsonist, besties with Pandora, intentionally does stereotypical ‘quiet kid’ stuff just to fuck with his peers, everyone’s afraid of him just how he likes,

Evan: asexual but will ruin Barty sexually (doesn’t get any sexual gratification but enjoys watching Barty squirm and have the best time), collects animal parts in jars and has a ‘bone room’, is that creepy kid, has definitely been to the psych ward before

Lily: lesbian, poly-ish, dating Mary and Pandora, huge chemistry nerd, in the debate club, very popular/friends with nearly everyone

Mary: bisexual, poly-ish, dating Lily and Pandora, very cottagecore, quiet vibes, besties with Peter, vegan/all about saving the planet (but not in a awful way), forgetful and always has a million alarms and reminders on her phone

Marlene: nonbinary they/them, so lesbian they never had to come out, obsessed with gf Dorcas, plays basketball, them and James often do one on one and vent, loves movies and will watch literally anything

Dorcas: lesbian, dating Marlene, most said words are probably “wtf Marlene”, party girl, cheerleader, legit hates men except Reggie but only because they were close before he transitioned and she’d miss him

Pandora: unknown sexuality (always just shrugs when asked), very manic pixie girl vibes, heavy on the manic, sometimes commits arson with bestie Barty, Evan’s unused dead things’ parts are made into fertilizer for her garden (which is impressive btw, mostly flowers but a hidden section of poisonous plants), always has something creepy or downright unsettling to say

Also…

-James is Indian

-Remus is technically white but he does not look it (and it always surprises people), and he’s conveniently unattractive bc I love ugly remus

-Pandora and Evan are black (with naturally white blond hair ofc) and Pandora has vitiligo

-Sirius and Regulus moved from France as children

-Mary is black

-Dorcas is black

It takes place in Canada bc I’m Canadian and I know fuck all about European anything and am too lazy to do research.

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 46

chapter 70:

1. “And now the furniture is covered in dust, the books haven't been touched, the flowers are dead, the food has spoiled, and all the little pieces of himself from before feel foreign to him, like they're from a complete stranger.”

why did i blindly hope that crimson rivers couldn’t get more sad??

2. “Regulus couldn't have imagined it, then. Barty dying. Being dead. He was safe, aged out from reapings, and he would have made it if the war hadn't taken him.”

i want to gnaw on something. this is driving me crazy. i need to go eat dirt oh my god

3. every time i briefly forget about evan in this fic, his name is name dropped like a fucking bomb from the sky and i literally want to break a window

4. “And then there's Sirius, who barely knows what to do with his own pain, struggling to balance it, like he's not allowed to have it, feeling like an imposter for simply daring to grieve a man who wasn't his father as a father, as if that man didn't love him as a son.” the monty and sirius bond are still making me cry, actually

5. “I know I will be dead long before you read this,”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

once again, had to voice memo my freind

6. welcome back to another round of lily vs the fridge

7. mary: you love dorcas

lily: NOOO!!! only you babes 😘

mary: fucking dumbass

8. idk how to explain it, but i’m glad that mary and lily (and dorcas and marlene) had such complex relationships. they weren’t just the badass lesbians who had it all together and had a perfect relationship that scoffed at the silly boys. they love just as hard and fumble just as hard. their relationships are far from perfect and are very messy. i love it

9. “His dad watched these flowers bloom.

His dad never saw them die.”

*eye twitch*

10. maybe i shouldn’t blame dorcas, but i’m kinda pissed at her for not showing up to marlene’s funeral

11. “Barty got a funeral, too. Regulus planned that one, and you could tell, because it was done so delicately.”

screaming crying throwing up

what if i never spoke again? as like some sort of stupid protest? as like a statement to show how upset i am over bartys death? huh?? what would you do then bizzarestars????? huh?????????

12. “Vanity got honored as a war hero in the Hallow, a statue raised in her honor on the castle grounds, replacing Riddle's legacy.” i’m actually losing my mind. i want to shovel grass in my mouth and chew stained glass. idk or drink a latte or something

13. bro i’m so mad that sirius was 100% right about how james wouldn’t grieve around him, always wanting to take care of sirius, which is why he has to leave. i’m so mad. i’m so mad. this is gonna hurt

14. “”Fucking hell, James, we're still in love, so calm down. It's—it's not an actual breakup, you know."” -sirius

😭😭😭 they’re such soulmates omg

15. oh god it hurt more than i thought. james thought sirius was about to break the news about remus leaving. not sirius leaving. james never once considered that sirius would leave

16. SNSKDNJSNSMSKSM THEYRE KISSING YAY OMG JEGULUS KISSS OMGGG AFTER LITERALLY TWO MONTHS THEYRE KISSING AGAIN

chapter 71:

1. “[Regulus] is such a sweet boy, and yes, yes, [Effie] has seen him murder, but that matters very little to her, overall” me talking about my favorite characters 🥰

2. wolfstar

currently wanting to gnaw through concrete and plywood over them

3. “Remus also calls Lily every day. They're more discreet about it, not practically confessing their love and trying to make out through the screen the way James and Sirius do”

remus: this is my boyfreind sirius, and that’s my boyfreind’s boyfreind, james ♥️

4. remus thinking of sirius as a helicopter parent towards regulus has me in fucking tears omg that’s so funny

5. “That's the first time they have sex after the war, when Remus tells Sirius how he made Riddle pay for all that he'd done.”

idk, but that’s not the sentence i was expecting

6. 😭😭😭 remus realizing that lyall never liked any of his ex boyfreinds, and the fact that he approves of sirius, the murderer, is laughable

7. jealous sirius kissing remus within an inch of his life 😭😭😭

8. “It's no secret that Sirius likes the hickies, but it's not just him; the truth is, the only thing Remus likes more than getting to put them there is getting to see them there.”

uhhh um uhhhhh hot

9. 👀 they getting nasty

10. james being a teacher >>>>>>>>>>>

11. what are sirius and regulus gonna get up to?

12. it’s heartbreaking that lily and mary have to raise bingley. on one hand, it’s domestic and it’s their little family. on the other hand, they never should have had to do this. lily cooks and tucks him into bed and raises him. but she’s not his mom. and mary raises bingley. but she’s not his mom. and it’s so scary to navigate this

13. THE BAGELS

14. james’ knife kink >>>>>>>>>

15. omg i’m a blubbering mess. they have a home together!!!

16. hello!???? they’re dancing together????? in their home?????? what if i burst into tears?????

17. AWWWWW JAMES PROPOSED AGAIN

18. please please please please tell me we get a marriage chapter

[ang3l0fde4th4ndd0gs]

Wolfhunter Microfic

Words: 201

“Crouch, you’re dead if you ever do that again.”Remus growled in terror as he sat beside his boyfriend’s sleeping form in the Hogwarts infirmary.

He’d been sitting there for only five minutes but time seemed to take forever to pass. Barty had gotten into yet another fight with Severus after the half-blood had been caught bullying Remus.

“Bartiemus, I swear.”Remus grumbled, nudging the boy’s shoulder.

“Rem, calm down. I’m fine. No need for the full name.”

“You’re an idiot.”

“Oh please. I did my job and gave him what he deserved for what he did to you. You’re my boyfriend.”

“And got hexed doing so.”

Barty sat up completely and held his arms out for the werewolf boy. Remus climbed into the boy’s lap and kissed Barty.

“Don’t you ever do that again.”Remus mumbled.

“I love you. And I’ll do it until he leaves you alone.”

“I know. That doesn’t make this any easier though.”

“You don’t love me?”

“I fucking adore you. But I would rather love the living dumbass that I know, not a casket with his body in it.”

“I’ll try not to die then.”

“You’d better.”

Barty grinned and kissed his boyfriend once more.

[acewitch-writes]

Scrolling on here is so whiplash inducing because one post will be the most delicious, canon-based take on Sirius Black I have ever seen, acknowledging his core traits and analyzing his character in an intelligent, nuanced way independent of his relationship with Remus

...and then the very next post will be some incorrect quote BS or a snippet or a wildly OOC take that depicts Sirius as a mindless, love-crazed dumbass whose entire personality is acting as a cocksleeve for his big strong alpha master that only just barely tolerates him and gets off on belittling and mocking his trauma.

[part-time-zombie]

I love remus as a character because of how different he can be based on how I think of him.

If I take him at face value, he's hilarious. He doesn't care. He's happy. He's clever. He's simultaneously a smartass and a dumbass. He eats deodorant and keeps his bear trap in the fridge. He eats spaghetti with a straw and plays ddr with janus. He's unhinged and feral and makes presents out of stuff from his shower drain. He loves bringing up unpleasant stuff just to bother everyone else. He is just here to create chaos and nothing more and he loves it.

But if I decide he cares... if he cares it can hurt so much. He loves his friends. He misses his brother. His only companion is janus, who probably doesn't even like him. No one else cares about him as much as he does for them. Everyone thinks he's disgusting and scary just for being himself when he doesn't know what else to be. He tries so hard just to do his job and is hated for it. The present he was given was shallow and the present he gave was rejected. No one wants to be around him, so he has no one to be with.

I just think it's neat how much I can do with him.