#Where are introverted characters who love people who know how to joke smile and laugh and oh my goodness have friends! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-wisteria-house · 2 years

Text

How You and Aizawa got together.

I know this has been done-but I wanted to give my take on it.

WARNINGS: Angsty, mutual pinning, mentions of character death, and not to graphic mentions of injuries.

So you and Aizawa went to UA together, but you where in class B.

The two of you where both introverted awkward messes.

The only reason you first ever spoke to one another in the first place was because he was in your hiding spot during lunch.

The conversation was pretty awkward honestly.

"I uh, didn't realize somone else knew about this spot..." You stammered awardly, not knowing what to say.

He thankfully saved you from social suicide and spoke next.

"Sorry, I didn't know someone else ate here, it is a dusty old closet... It's kinda a gloomy spot." He said in a blunt, but clearly embarrassed tone.

He didn't talk to people much (especially girls)

"Man, you didn't have to put it like that." You glared at the other first year. Though there was no real malice in your voice.

He was right after all.

"You're here too though y'know." You couldn't help but retort.

The boy only gave you a blank look before responding with a simple: "Touche."

From that point forward you guys would eat lunch together everyday.

You bonded over your dislike for socialization (ironically) and having mental quirks.

It was just you guys.

Well just you guy's until you both met Oboro and Hizashi,and they ruined it all.

Those boys would harass the two of you in your spot everyday, so you guys snuck up to the roof.

That didn't do much because they found you not to long later.

But what made it worse was because they found you and Shouta in a compromising position...

You guy's got in a playful argument about whether Greenday or MCR was better.(Greenday obviously)

It escalated into playful rough housing.

You had Shouta pined, hands holding his wrist above his head when you were found.

Oboro joking asked if the roof is where to two of you makeout.

Shouta couldn't look you in the eyes for weeks after that

He'd never admit it but he'd thought about it once or twice

But that's not all

He thought about holding your hand and making cringey poetry to recite to you (he totally dosen't have a book full already)

He couldn't stand how illogical you made him and it cracked the squad up

The boy's would alway try and set you and shou up on dates

Kageyama would also join in on the fun

Oboro would alway try and push Aizawa to confess to you

While Midnight would always give you tips on how to catch Aizawas attention or on how to tell him how you felt

But you never thought he liked you back

One day in your second year you were cloud gazing with oboro and you got on the topic of romance.

"Come on (n/n) you have to admit you a Shou would make an awesome couple!!!" He gave you a closed eyed smile.

"Oh shut it Weather-boy. Shouta dosen't like me that way...That's just some pipe dream." You can't help but sigh and glare at the sun

Oboro busted out laughing at this,"God- (n/n)!You-you're hopeless!"

He managed to calm down his laugher after a few minutes and give you a serious look

"Shouta adores you; he looks at you like you hung all the stares in the sky. He just doesn't know how to say it... I love him he's prettymuch my brother at this poin, but I know he'll get to in his head, and let his chance slip pass him."

You knew what Oboro was getting at

So you decided you'd confess to Shouta despite the urge to vomit at the idea

You and the gang were going to go to the arcade after your work studies ended for the

Your plan was to confess

Sadly that day never came

Your hope of ever confessing to Aizawa shattered the moment the ruble made contact with your best friend.

You fell into an anguish,but you had to keep it together for Shouta.

And you did for years, or at least made it look like it.

Shouta shut you out but you wouldn't leave his side.

You couldn't and never did.

You may have became shadows of who you once where, but you still cared deeply for one another.

You stopped eating on the roof; it hurt to much.

You started eating in the courtyard instead.

You usually ate in silence.

Hizashi joined you guy's in your spot,so did Nemir, but it wasn't the same.

Hizashi and Nemir both grew busy with work studies and couldn't join you anymore.

But eventually you guy's found your voices and slowly began to communicate again.

You where a pair to be feared in joint training exercises.

After graduating from UA you became roommates.

It was actually Shouta's idea. He said it was only logical to cut the living

Once you started living together you could tell the death of ypur freind still effected him as it did you

Then you had an accident

Your employer gave you some faulty intell on the target you were going after

You caught the suspect but not before you broke 3 ribs, your left arm, right leg, and had a minor concussion

The hair on the villain could turn into a blade; you had a perment scar on you left cheek after that

You were in the hospital for a few day's, but you were passed out for the most of it.

According to the nurses Shouta refused to leave your side.

He took you home once you were ready to be discharged.

He was very attentive, but oddly distant at the same time.

This only grew worse as time progressed. He'd become snappy, though he'd never raise his voice.

You thought he was annoyed at having to take care of you so you tried to convince him to go back to work.

He didn't know how to respond. Did you want him to leave? He couldn't leave you alone what if you got hurt, and he could have stopped it?

No he couldn't leave you when you were vulnerable. "No, not now." He said, voice absent of any emotion.

He would remain seemingly absent of emotion. Well until the fight.

You where trying to get something off the top shelve in the kitchen, but you were ment to be on bedrest.

You couldn't reach the snack you wanted and tried to use your crutch. In hindsight this was foolish on your part.

You fell and that produced a loud bang, rousing shouta from his nap.

When he heard the bang from the kitchen he instantly knew something was wrong.

He ran as fast to investigate and found you on the floor. "(N/n)- What the hell are you doing out of bed!" His eyes were glowing a intimidating red as his eyes peirced your very soul.

He was pissed

He quickly, but as gently as he could picked you up of the floor.

He didn't utter a single word till you got to your room.

Then all hell broke loose.

"Are you and idiot!? The doctor told you to stay in bed! Are you trying to het your self hurt?" He blew up with in seconds of placing you on your bed.

"I was hungry!"You try to defend.

This only made his more angry. "I would have made you something! It was illogical for you to get up and risk getting hurt!"

You knew he was right but you couldn'tback down,"I didn't want to ask you! I could do it myself!"

"If you could do it yourself then why did I have to pick you up off the floor?!" He was pacing back and forth at this point, the tension in his shoulders clear.

You where at a lost for words,"I-why-why do you care so much! It's my body!" You quickly spit out.

"It's because I love you damnit! God- I always have...I can't loose you too...It'd kill me if I did- I know that for sure." His voice grew quite at the end.

The shock must have been clear on your face. It took you a few minutes to respond. "I-Shout...What do you mean?"

"Damnit- when you're involved all rationality flies out the window! It makes no sense!" At this point he's gripping his hair like a life line.

When he walks past you again you grab his arms and stop him.

"How long." The question hangs in the air until he quitly breathes out, "Since we were 15..."

You got him to sit down eventually.

That night was full of alot of confessions and tears.

Okay I'll be honest...I did not edit this. I started this 2 weeks ago and added pieces here and there, so there may not be much of a flow, but I spent to much time on it to not post it...

I hope you enjoyed please feel free to tell me what you think. :)

#aizawa x y/n #aizawa #aizawa headcanons #mha aizawa #mha midoriya #aizawa fluff #aizawa angst #aizawa sensei #shouta aizawa #aizawa shouta #bnha fanfiction #mha #mha fanfiction #y/n x mha #mha headcanons #bnha headcanons #aizawa x female reader #aizawa x gn!reader #aizawa x male reader

397 notes · View notes

naoko-world · 2 years

Text

How I relate to (most of) the characters in Encanto

I often say I relate to a lot of characters in Encanto! Not everyone of them, like I'm nothing like Julieta, but a lot of them are like me in their own way. Honestly there are so many it's like this movie was made to touch me.

Starting with Bruno because...He's my favorite so...And I'm the one to decide!

I relate to Bruno a lot! Well, I'm neurodivergeant, I have some mental health issues and honestly I'm glad they cut that scene where we see him talk to his rats. Because it would hit too close from home and could have triggered me.

Like him, sometimes I try to make people laugh and it fails because I'm bad at joking (Bruno is hilarious though) then it gets awkward and I'm hoping it didn't spoil my relationship with people. Well, because like him again I'm pretty nervous and anxious. I often fidget with my hands (or feet) like he does and seriously if I could hide in the walls of my home I totally would to just escape my worries. With some entertainments because it would quickly be a bit boring alone in there.

Also I would totally have tried a joke like "It looks like rain" to try to make a member of my family laughs and it thus lead a big event into a disaster...I mean I know I tried making jokes and it was taken seriously. And I had to apologize. Same thing when I say things a bit too bluntly because I didn't think I'd hurt someone by talking like I did.

I too have a very low esteem of myself. I think I'm not a good person, I'm someone who can feel really dark feelings, someone who can hurt others because of jealousy or because I have one person bothering me so I grow hate and anger.

I also look an awfully lot like Mirabel!

Like physically I have glasses, she has glasses, I have a round face, she has too, short hair like her and curls in my hair. Hers are curlier though, my hair are more wavy. And her skin is darker than mine.

It's not the only part I look like her though since I have the same kind of anxiety of her and Bruno. I just want to be special, want to be skilled, to be useful to the society which I can't do because I don't have a job so some people think I'm just lazy. I'm not lazy though, I'm job hunting but recruiters feel I'm nervous so they don't want to have me in their company because I'd "be eaten" (yes, one recruiter decided to not lose more time and told me that).

Another part I have in common with Mirabel, something people I love know about, is when I love someone I'll show it a lot. If I was in a musical like Encanto I'd have one song for each of my closed friends telling them how wonderful they are!

When I was a kid I was talking really low and I sometimes talk low without noticing it, but when growing up I started talking way louder and becoming more extravert and less introvert, my shyness showing less. I'm still shy though, like I smile a lot and give excited answers to hide my nervosity and uncertainty. Well, now when I need to interact with people I take a deep breath before.

But enough with Mirabel! Time to talk about Pepa!

Maybe it'll surprise people but I tend to be a really bad-tempered woman. Like when I can easily get angry and when I do it's hard to actually hide it.

So yeah I can relate to Pepa. I still manage to contain my anger until I can unleash it somewhere but MAN if I had Pepa's gift I would like get much more upset than the usual because I'd get upset for being upset and afraid people would hate me for getting upset.

Me with Pepa's gift, Paris would very often see hurricanes.

That's all for Pepa now is...Luisa's turn!

Yes, after Pepa, Bruno and Mirabel I relate a lot to Luisa.

It'll be quick though: I can understand feeling I must carry the weight of everything on my shoulders.

I'm not the oldest of my siblings, I'm actually the youngest, but my older brother is autistic. I'm not talking about autistics like @hectic-hector for example who can still be independant, more an autism like can't understand how to (or the point to) use a computer, is yelling instead of talking, and if we don't watch over him he could empty the fridge or go on the road and be killed. It's like that since I was a kid and I always felt I had to be the oldest, be the one in charge to look after him, to literally carry the weight on my shoulders.

I also tend to take very seriously every task I'm given, and I gets desperate when I can't do it efficiently.

But enough with Luisa! Now is time to talk about the one I didn't imagine I'd relate to her: Isabela!

Well, I was never said I should be perfect but I still feel I must, as if any mistake from my part is unforgivable. As if if something isn't perfect from my part it's worth nothing. As if I must always smile and be sweet, never be angry or the one in need of moral support. Like I'm not even authorized to cry because it bothers my dad.

Ah but well there is also what I said in my analysis of the Adults in Encanto on Isabela's character and how she stays feminine but by her own terms at the end of the movie. About how, again, I was the "not like other girls" girl because I like Video games, mangas, hate makeup and shopping...So I was saying I'm not feminine because I'm not a woman according to the society's view of a woman.

However I still identify as a woman and I still have feminine parts. There was the parts asked to me by the society (and especially some other women) which I didn't like and ended up being hateful toward in response to pressure, and there was the parts nobody asked me for but are still considered feminines. Like I like taking care of my hair, I like wearing some hairclips, crunchies, or hairbands. I like jewellery too like I have some in a box. I wear some earrings everyday, as well as a pendant about Bruno because I love it. I love plushies and dolls too or knitting. I'm fond of what's cute! I'm feminine!

This is why I can relate to her as the pressure to be perfect, but also the pressure to be what society says I should be as a woman.

Who else?

I think I can relate to Camilo?

Also have to be the one to smile and reassure the others. And afraid to be a bother when I complain.

Antonio?

Like nobody asks me for anything, especially when I was a kid, but I still could see what was happening and I wanted to help, not let the adults struggle while I was playing. I wanted to show we could count on me! Be of use!

Agustin?

Like I can understand wanting to reassure someone and be afraid for them but still having to smile and then someone else says something and I realise it's what I should have said. Then I'd literally yell on someone else to defend them.

And...Alma.

Yes, I can relate to HER! She's the antagonist but I also said she's an amazing character with a tragic story who doesn't deserve the hate. Today though I realise I can even relate to her in some way. Even while I'm still only in my 30's.

I know a bit the feeling to want to control everything, to have everything be perfect and be frustrated when everything doesn't go according to the plan because I doesn't want errors to be repeated.

Like me not wanting to see hate on the Internet anymore after my experience on Twitter and people hating each other for nothing. But I can't control people, even those I love.

Well, honestly at this point that's all! It's a good way to reflect on myself to say who I can relate to and how! And it's again an occasion to analyse characters I love!

#encanto #encanto analysis #my analysis #mirabel madrigal #bruno madrigal #pepa madrigal #luisa madrigal #isabela madrigal #agustin madrigal #antonio madrigal #camilo madrigal #abuela alma madrigal #alma madrigal #abuela madrigal #abuela alma #very personal

19 notes · View notes

wenellyb · 4 years

Text

My journey in the MCU fandom on Tumblr: Sharing my thoughts on the Falcon and the Winter Soldier, racism in the MCU fandom and the best and the worse of the fandom

I wasn’t going to write this much but here I am… I don’t even know where I’m going with this but since The Falcon and the Winter Soldier just recently came out, I wanted to share some thoughts.

I joined Tumble because of a show I loved but most of you don’t know it “ Hit the Floor”

I stayed on Tumblr for two reasons only, Anthony Mackie and Sebastian Stan.

Before the Captain America:Civil War premiere, a friend sent me the link to the Sebastian and Anthony ET interview, and I was hooked. In just one interview. I discovered Anthony Mackie. The guy was hilarious!!! I just couldn’t get enough and I knew I had to know more about him. How could he improvise so many funny lines on the spot? He was just amazing.

I had pretty much watched all the avengers movie but that was it. I was not involved in the fandom. So I knew Sam Wilson’s face, but I couldn’t even remember his name if my life depended on it. That’s how much the MCU treated him as a side character.

I was like how the f*ck don’t I know this guy?

His talent reminded me of Eddie Murphy, Jim Carrey or Robin Williams, like yes they can make some emotional or serious movies, but when they want to make you laugh, you will laugh. Whether you want it or not. I kept wondering how this guy wasn’t more famous.

And the banter with Sebastian Stan? Wow, you could tell their friendship was strong, the way Sebastian lighted up when Anthony was talking, and keep bouncing off his jokes. It was art. the way Sebastian said “ I love you” at the end of the interview. Pure gold.

I then started to watch some of the interviews and boy was that a mistake!!! I literally couldn’t get enough. So I watched all and I say all their interviews, it was the best. We got some gems:

“Why aren’t you looking at me as much”

“Which way is the beach Seabass”

*Them saying nonsense in Spanish and then Sebastian Saying Papi Chulo*

¨And so many more, ....

I watched other solo Anthony interviews and he was still HILARIOUS, but you could also tell he felt a little bit more at ease with Sebastian around. I won’t pretend I know him or his personality, but Sebastian seems like a little bit more of an introvert and looks like he doesn’t enjoy the interview experience unless Anthony id around him. Just my thoughts

I watched the interviews before I went to see the movie, I even cosplayed as the Winter Soldier to the movie premiere and I was IN!!! When I saw Captain America Civil War, I became a SamBucky shipper, these two were hilarious and I really so the potential for a great realtionship I love enemy to lovers stories.

I also shipped Stucky because, to me, the trope of the movie was Superhero gives up everything to protect his long term friend” Hollywood movies have some codes and if Bucky were a female character, there is no doubt in my mind that the movie would have been marketed as romance.

Stucky really was an easy ship! But then the MCU fandom of Tumblr fandom messed up everything for me. You see I really liked the CACW and I I liked Stucky, I liked Sambucky, and I loved the introduction of t’Challa’s character, but one of things that affected me the most in the movie was that it was the first blockbuster I watched with 3 black main characters, Rhodey, Sam and T’Challa. That, and the fact that they were planning to realease a Black Panther movie in two years, I was super excited, and that’s the main reason I got involved in the MCU fandom so much, when before, I was just a casual watcher.

If this seem weird to you, then you have no idea how we were only getting crumbs before. For me it was soo huge, I even told all my friends, and they were laughing at me. But usually blockbusters, especially superhero movies get one black character and that’s it, usually the best friend or something and never the leads. So, for me it really was a big deal. How sad is that by the way…

I became more involved in the fandom and, at first, I wasn’t focusing on anything special, Sambucky, Stucky, Stackie, the Black Panther, and even Zemo, whose character I really liked.

But soon I noticed that the CACW tags were always flooded, and I mean flooded with the same two white characters: Steve and Bucky. I told myself, ok that’s fine Steve is the lead after all, but it would be good to see the other characters too.

And then I noticed another interesting trend: Evanstan…. Wait what?

Chris Evans, and Sebastian Stan… did I miss something? Listen, obviously I’m sure they must be friends or something, but you’re going to tell me you watch all MCU the actors and you’re going to focus on Steve and Sebastian? I’m sorry what?

Sebastian and Anthony are right there… Or Chris and Anthony, they even have a secret handshake, only the 2 of them do… what more do you want?

Tell me one iconic Evanstan moment… go ahead tell me… See??? There isn’t.

Because of this and because of how badly some Stuckies were treating Sam and Anthony. I became less and less of a stucky shipper . I mainly focused on SamBucky, Stackie and the Black Panther,

And then the Sebastian Stan stans saw how popular Stackie, Sambucky, were becoming and I started to see some problematic stuff in our fandom too.

I don’t want to generalize, but when you go into the Stackie tag, and you see cropped pictures of Sebastian without Anthony, it’s easy to assume that a Sebastian fan did that. And we know damn well you cropped out Anthony because we watched all Stackie interviews and know exactly which interview your picture was taken from. We know that Anthony was sitting right next to Seb.

You post a picture of Sebastian laughing but you crop out the person who was making him laugh??

“but it has nothing to do with race” How do you know that?

“Sebastian had more screen time” More screen time than Anthony in CATWS or CACW? I don’t think so.

“I have been a fan of Sebastian for longer”, that’s fine but don’t go out cropping Anthony, just post gifs of Seb in his usual, sad, and Anthony-less interviews, not the ones where he’s smiling because his best friend is next to him.

Some of you really are the worst. And just so you know, your fave Sebastian is Anthony’s biggest fan, if he saw pictures where you cropped out Anthony, he would block you on the spot.

When I realized that Anthony Mackie would be the next Captain America I was screaming, no actually, I was crying, Sam Wilson will be Captain America, and Anthony would finally get the recognition he deserves.

You would think that the MCU fandom would focus on Captain America or at least one the two leads, instead of just Sebastian? Right? Right? WRONG.

Anthony is handsome, he’s funny, he’s a great actor, he went to freaking Julliard, he’s at the top, I don’t see what else the man can do??? He should already be a superstar, but no, you will side-line him even to he is the lead of the show.

Even when they are the actual leads, you guys would do anything to bring up the White characters even if it means ignoring the Black characters.

I remember I was having a conversation about Black Panther with my friends and I asked one of my white friends who was his favorite character in BP was and he told me Martin Freeman (don’t even remember his name in the movie) Martin Freaking Freeman, there are half a dozen of great characters and your fave is the only white man??? Ok, ok, that’s great.

Don’t give out automatic reply like “It has nothing to do with race, if you haven’t thought about it first”, because there’s a high probability that it is indeed about race. Stop saying it isn’t, sit down and ask yourself, “Am I biased?” “Why am I reblogging only stuff related to the white characters”.

One of these days you guys are going to make me hate Sebastian with the sh*t you are pulling.

I looove the Stackie friendship and the Sambucky dynamic but after seeing the way some of you treat Anthony and Sam’s character, it make me want to focus on Sam’s character and forget about the rest.

I remember they were some posts about how Anthony was problematic, and I just lost it. Apparently, there was an old article that resurfaced were Anthony was making a joke about women making sandwiches or something.

If you were offended by the sandwich joke, that is totally ok, and I can understand that.

But if you were offended by the sandwich joke, and saying Anthony is problematic BUT you still stan Chris Evans, Jeremy Renner, ScarJo or even Sebastian Stan, just know that there is a high probability you’re racist.

They have all said or done problematic stuff, and people only seem to remember stuff related to Anthony, which was probably just a joke by the way.

Chris Evans and Jeremy called Black widow a wh*re, ScarJo took roles that she maybe shouldn’t have and I didn’t forget Sebastian shady Instagram post, when Kaepernick was kneeling. There are so many more things to be said about Jeremy Renner but google is your friend.

Anthony also got hate for hating on Tom Holland? Like what? Do you guys even hear yourselves? Don’t you have any friends you like to tease? If you hate someone, do you go around talking about him every chance you get? It was obviously friendly banter but some people wanted to turn it into something it was not. Sigh.

I really cannot with this fandom

The stackie fandom was small at the beginning and the Sambucky fandom even smaller, but we were there and it was amazing. Sebastian and Anthony received the same amount of love from the fandom and I wish we could go back to those days.

Stop pretending the fandom isn’t racist. Stop saying “it isn’t about race” when you haven’t even thought about.

Saying “it has nothing to do with race” only shows that you haven’t thought about anything but don’t want to be called a racist.

There is racism in this fandom and it will always be there, but if you guys want to do anything about it, you have to acknowledge it first.

You can’t be pulling off stuff like “I don’t see colors”, “ it has nothing to do with race”. Stop, sit down, think about it and then we can have a conversation.

If you’ve made it till the end, I apologize for the typos and grammar mistakes, I wasn’t planning on writing this much.

#tfatws #anthony mackie #Sebastian Stan #stackie #sambucky #Chris Evans #captain america #CACW #fandom racism #I didn't mean to write this much #my posts

387 notes · View notes

thedragonnerd · 3 years

Text

Rayaari headcanon - canon learning each others' hidden talents

(inspired by this lovely anon)

When Raya and Namaari finally start dating, to the relief of all around them, they soon learn that despite knowing each other for a long time, there are still many surprises to discover about the other person.

After politely tasting Raya's jackfruit jerky, Namaari had (perhaps uncharitably) assumed that Raya would be terrible at cooking. But on one of their first dates, Raya surprises her with a picnic, full of wonderful food that she confesses she made herself. Namaari devours everything on her plate, and vows right then to encourage Raya to cook more often. (The jerky is never produced again, however)

Namaari is a fairly introverted person, good at leading her soldiers when they need a commander, but just as content to sit back in a group and observe quietly. She rarely seeks to make herself center of attention outside of her official duties, and even for dancing, Raya has to interlink their fingers and drag her onto the dance floor before she relaxes enough to have fun in a crowd. It is because of this that Raya assumes she will not be interested in joining into an impromptu singing session that Sisu and some of their friends have started around a campfire one night. But when Namaari laughs and begins to sing along also, the voices of everyone else begin to fade away, too surprised at the beautiful sound coming from her mouth. Namaari is embarrassed when she realises, but Raya's shining eyes manage to persuade her to sing for them again.

Raya has never seemed comfortable around children, at least not in the way Namaari shows herself to be. Some of this is simply because Raya isn't used to tiny humans, and isn't sure how to entertain them. One day however, Namaari is called away to carry out some political duties, and she begs Raya to take over the training session for the little ones, just for the afternoon. When she returns a few hours later, she finds Raya surrounded by a pile of very worn out children, telling them a story while using several surprisingly accurate accents and voices for the different characters. Namaari watches quietly while Raya finishes her tale and cheers along with the children at the description of its final battle, full of dynamic character voices.

One of Raya's favourite places to relax is next to a secluded lake not far from the palace in Heart. Whenever Namaari visits, they invariably find themselves there almost every evening, at least in the warm months. It's especially useful when they are seeking privacy for kisses, where there is less risk of someone disturbing them. Raya likes to lie there quietly with her eyes shut, listening to the sound of the water gently lapping at the stones on the shore, and feeling the warmth of Namaari lying next to her. Sometimes however, Namaari is far more restless, not able to lie still for too long. The first time this happens, Raya opens her eyes to find Namaari skipping stones across the lake, watching the rock bounce impressively until it disappears into the water far away from where they stand. No matter how much she tries, Raya will never be able to skip the stone as much - nor is she be able to throw anything as far as Namaari can in general. Raya blames Namaari's arm mucles.

Raya is however a physical person, often running around and finding Things To Do, or fights to train for, or adventures she can drag Namaari along on. Some of these activities result not only in scrapes and bruises on her own skin, but tears in her clothing also. Namaari is impressed to see Raya is very adept with a needle and thread, fixing the small holes in her day-to-day clothes without even thinking to find a seamstress. 'It was a useful skill to have, out there in our past world,' Raya tells her, when she see Namaari watching.

Namaari loves to work with knives, Raya notices. And not just swords or knives for throwing in a fight, but small pocket knives that she can pull out and thoughtlessly play with. Sometimes when they are relaxing, Namaari hunts down a piece of wood, and will sit and quietly carve out small figurines. She gifts some to the children of Fang or Heart, but most of them make their way into Raya's possession. Some of them she places carefully on a shelf in her bedroom, but her favourites she carries on her person at all times, as a nice reminder of Namaari.

For some frustrating reason, Raya cannot always sleep well at night, always too restless at bedtime unless lying in bed with an arm curled over Namaari's waist. But during the day...well, she can fall into a short nap in an instant. It's a trick she learnt on the road during the Druun years - being able to catch a power nap while Tuk Tuk stood watch was a valuable skill to have. Sometimes, Namaari finds it slightly frustrating when they are in the middle of a conversation, only for her to turn and find Raya fast asleep almost mid-sentence. But Raya looks so sweet when she naps, Namaari instead ends up just watching her with a smile on her face.

Whenever they are at large parties or Council gatherings, Namaari always impresses Raya by her ability to recognize the names and faces of everyone around them. Raya can barely remember the main Council members, let alone their advisors and whatever political envoys are visiting for the week. Namaari however can smoothly slide into conversations with anyone around her, even remembering small details about the person's personal life that they may have mentioned a visit or two previously. It's a skill that Namaari learnt from a young age, needing to emerge as a strong leader for Fang, and that required being able to connect to her people. In return, everyone in Fang bows deeply to their Princess, a love in their hearts for their leader who can smile and call each person by name.

Namaari is a serious person by nature, so often focused on work or stressed about responsibilities that weigh on her shoulders. But Raya...Raya can always make her laugh, even during inopportune times such as Council meetings. She seems to have the ability to know exactly when Namaari's mood needs lifting, as well as the uncanny knowledge of whether it is a silly joke that will set off her smile for the day, or some biting sarcastic remark.

After six years of being alone and without any human to truly trust or have as a support, Raya has become accustomed to moments of feeling unsafe. Sometimes, this feeling overwhelms her when she's in the middle of a large crowd; other times, it is late at night in the darkness. But whenever Namaari is there, those feelings of vulnerability fade, her steadiness and calm manner bringing a sense of security to Raya. Even at night, if Raya awakens and senses fear, she merely has to burrow into Namaari's arms, and the strong hands on her back will let a feeling of calm wash over her.

#rayaari #raya and the last dragon #ratld #raya #namaari #raya and namaari #raya x namaari #hidden talents headcanon #i went with a few themes:#against assumptions #silly talents #talents with their hands #talents for survival #talents for each other

227 notes · View notes

gamerwoo · 4 years

Text

[SVT Imprinted] Seokmin: Sweet Talker

Anonymous asked: Can I request a Seokmin Imprinted story? Like he’s such a sunshine but his mate is total opposite of him? She’s constantly doubting herself and being insecure and he shows her just how awesome she is? In well, a very convincing way 😏

Characters: Seokmin x female reader

Genre/warnings: werewolf au, angst in the beginning, fluff, smut (fingering, lots of praise, just seokmin being super soft n sweet)

Word count: 3,028

Summary: Seokmin is bright, cheery and confident. You, as his mate, are shy, quiet, and awkward. You know Seokmin loves you the way you are because he’s explained how the mating pull works, but sometimes you don’t live up to your own expectations. Seokmin takes it as his job to show you how amazing you truly are.

Tags: @psshwa @uglyratlmao @brokenbutchocolate @shra-vasti @killcomet

Unable to tag: @junuoyi

Previous | Next | Imprinted Masterlist

If you asked the pack if they noticed your integration into the house, they’d be lying if they said yes. You were quiet and kept to yourself -- somehow much more reserved than even Jihoon. They definitely knew you existed, and they knew you were Seokmin’s mate that he had met at his part-time job waiting tables, but they honestly didn’t know at what point you moved in. Half the time, one of them even ran into you because they didn’t “see you there”.

Don’t get it wrong, you didn’t find your shyness to be a problem. You’d accepted yourself to be introverted and quiet a long time ago, and you knew Seokmin loved you exactly the way you were.

Seokmin made up for everything you lacked. He was loud, bubbly, and loved making new friends and talking to new people. He immediately caught your eye when he was hired to work the same shift as you, and you couldn’t be more happy that fate brought the two of you together.

You didn’t want to exchange your quiet demeanor for a louder one like Soonyoung’s, You didn’t want to give up your reserved attitude for Eunmi’s outgoing one. But you still had your moments where you wished you could walk around the house in just a sports bra and joggers like Aya, or snort loudly at a joke without fear of getting made fun of like Faye. You couldn’t help but feel a little insecure sometimes because that’s how you’d always been, even before you met Seokmin.

It wasn’t that you were insecure because you were worried Seokmin might fall out of love with you. You already understood there was a 0% chance of that happening. You just sometimes felt down about yourself for no particular reason. Seokmin knew this, too, and tried to help you out as often as he could. He never hesitated to shower you in kisses and reassurance because that was the type of caring person he was.

But you did have a particularly bad day, though. It started out that morning when Rini brought Kaito over to visit. The excited three-year-old made his typical rounds, saying hello to all of the pack. He ended up in Eunmi’s arms at the end, though, because he liked to look at her scars. The first time he saw them, he excitedly told her “y’know, girls love scars” which earned a hardy laugh from the pack who was nearby. He thought she was tough and cool, but still a nice sisterly figure that would play with him if he asked.

“Alright, I gotta go to class,” she told him, causing him to pout. “Aw, don’t look at me like that. Why don’t you go to _____?”

“I don’t wanna!” he whined, gripping onto Eunmi tighter.

You weren’t offended by his statement. You knew he had a soft spot for Eunmi because he wanted to be as cool as her when he grew up -- next to Soonyoung, who was his ultimate idol. You just brushed it off as a clingy child wanting to stay with his favorite.

“But she’s nice, and she’ll play with you,” Eunmi told him softly, rubbing his back so he wouldn’t start crying.

“She’s too quiet,” he huffed.

Eunmi looked at you, giving you an apologetic look. You just forced a small smile and pretended like the comment didn’t get to you. But it did, and it was probably obvious. Even the child who liked everyone didn’t want to hang out with you.

The day only got worse when you went in for your shift at the restaurant. Seokmin was already there and working, and he grinned and kissed your cheek when you entered the kitchen. “Hello, my darling.”

“Hi, baby,” you replied quietly as usual, going to the back to get your apron.

You got ready to start your shift like you did any other day, punching in before grabbing your notepad and pen, and going to work the tables. The lunch rush wasn’t bad, you got a few good tips since you worked quickly and did your job well. You were a little bummed for Seokmin since he had to work the dinner shift, too, all because somebody called out when they were short staffed. But he assured you with his signature toothy grin that he didn’t mind it.

“More time with you!” he exclaimed, giving you a tight hug and kissing the top of your head.

“I love you,” you laughed softly.

“I love you more,” he replied as he usually did.

It was when the late night dinner rush started that things went downhill for you. More customers were coming in to sit at the bar, and that meant more of them were getting drunk and rowdy as they watched some sports game being played on the TVs.

You minded your business waiting tables, only pausing every once in a while when you had to walk passed Seokmin so you could smile at him. However, you were stopped by your coworker working the bar because they needed a hand. You’d only tended the bar a few times, but you weren’t bad at it, so you agreed and followed them around the back of the bar.

“When do you get off?” Hyunjin wondered as he picked up the order he was working on as if he never stopped.

“An hour,” you sighed as Hyunjin slid a glass with the things you’d need to make the drink that was ordered previously.

“This rush should be over by then,” he said mostly to himself as he looked up at the men and women sitting at the counter.

The two of you worked well and quickly together, mixing drinks and getting them off to the people who ordered them in good time. Nothing was spilled, you didn’t stutter when speaking to anyone for once, and you were proud of yourself for even the small feat you had accomplished. But one man that was getting pretty drunk ruined all of that for you.

“Hey, you!” he called, nodding his head at you when both you and Hyunjin looked up. “Shouldn’t they have pretty girls working the bar? Even this dude is cuter than you.”

His friends burst into laughter, and Hyunjin growled lowly in his chest. You just put a hand on his shoulder and shook your head, telling him silently to not worry about it.

“It’s the end of my shift anyway,” you shrugged with a forced half-smile.

“_____--”

“It’s okay, I promise,” you nodded before taking off your apron and walking back to the kitchen.

Your feet felt heavy, as did your head from the way it hung as you tried to avoid any eye contact as you walked through the busy kitchen to the back room. Seokmin had already gone home by now, so you were going home by yourself. That made you a little relieved, because you could at least cry in your car in peace. You didn’t want Seokmin to stress about you feeling bad about yourself.

Kaito’s comment from earlier was almost forgotten about up until that man commented on your appearance, and it just made you want to cry. Your personality sucked, your appearance sucked; was there anything good about you? Even a three-year-old didn’t want to hang out with you!

You clocked out, got your belongings, and walked as quickly as you could to your car. You started it up and pulled out of the parking lot, tears sliding down your cheeks and into your lap as you drove back to Seokmin’s. Not only were you too quiet and not pretty enough, but even the pack seemed to think you were invisible since they were constantly walking into you or forgetting you were there. Why couldn’t you be loud like Bomi, or pretty like Aya, or make your presence known like Faye? Why couldn’t you be as good as the other mates?

What did Seokmin even see in you?

You collected yourself once you pulled into the driveway, wiping your tears and making sure there was no sign you had cried. Then you got out of the car and went into the house. Almost immediately, you felt something clinging to your leg. You half expected it to be one of the pack just being weird, but you looked down and saw Kaito.

“What are you doing up this late?” you wondered quietly, afraid to raise your voice because you didn’t want anyone to know you had cried.

“Living room sleepover,” he explained, although he was pouting instead of smiling like he normally was. “Everyone’s too loud.”

You bent down and picked the toddler up. He wrapped his arms around your neck and rested his chubby cheek against your shoulder. Apparently he was sleepy and didn’t like the loud laughter coming from the living room.

“They are too loud,” you agreed. “Is Rini in there?”

“Nuh uh,” he yawned. “Rini’s in the shower, and she told Hoshi to tuck me in.”

You always thought the little nickname the Japanese boy gave Hoshi was cute, and it was always adorable to see the blond wolf light up whenever Kaito said it.

Instead of bringing Kaito back to the mess in the living room, you walked past the wolves that hadn’t seemed to notice his disappearance, and went to the kitchen for a snack for yourself. There, you found Seokmin already cooking at the stove with Bomi and Mingyu.

“Hey, _____,” Bomi smiled from where she sat at the table on her phone.

Hearing your name, Seokmin turned and grinned at you, coming over to hug you -- and the little kid in your arms -- before kissing your head, “Did you drive home okay?”

“Yeah,” you half-lied. “What’re you making?”

“Pancakes,” Mingyu replied with a sigh like he found the facile task boring. “Bomi got hungry, and Seokmin said you’d be hungry too.”

“He wasn’t wrong,” you admitted, sitting in a chair with Kaito still clinging to you. “Kaito, are you hungry?”

He shook his head, “I’m sleepy.”

“I can take you to Hoshi’s room,” Seokmin offered, going to take the child from you.

“No!” he whined, holding onto your harder. “_____ is quiet.”

You smiled to yourself, unable to hide it. After the awful day you had -- and the fact Kaito seemed to enjoy your shyness now -- you were proud to have this one good thing.

Seokmin grinned at your smile and chastely kissed your lips, earning an “ew” from Kaito. However, your boyfriend could still easily tell something was wrong. The light in your eyes was dull, and you kept spacing out as you looked at the table. He didn’t mention it, though, since he would rather ask you about it in private.

Mingyu finished the food and put a few on a plate for Bomi, and then gave you the rest. Then he sat down beside Bomi and watched her eat, rubbing his temples like he had a headache. You assumed he was just tired since the pack was being extra loud in the living room.

Since you were holding Kaito, Seokmin cut up your pancakes and fed them to you, giggling to himself. Once, Kaito did sit up and open his mouth so Seokmin would feed him, but then he laid back down, chewing his piece and closing his eyes again.

“Bed?” Seokmin asked as he got up to put the empty plate in the sink.

“I just have to--”

“I can take care of Kaito,” Seokmin assured you, reaching for the sleeping child.

Carefully, he took Kaito from your arms and gently shushed him when he stirred before leaving the kitchen. You followed soon after but went in the opposite direction when you got to the hall, going upstairs instead. You opened the door to Seokmin’s room and ran a hand through your hair, letting out a sigh. All you wanted was to sleep off these awful thoughts about yourself swimming through your head, so you hoped Seokmin hadn’t noticed anything off about you.

You started taking your work clothes off in exchange for your comfy pajamas, but Seokmin came in and wrapped his arms around your waist when you were in your bra and shorts. His skin was warm against yours as he rested his chin on your shoulder and let out a soft sigh.

He knew.

“Alright, my love,” he began, “tell me what’s wrong.”

You knew it was better to just admit your problems to him because he would find out one way or the other -- you quickly learned that -- but you didn’t want to get into it when it was getting late, “Can we do this tomorrow?”

“I won’t be able to sleep if I know you’re beside me and upset,” he frowned, using the cutest voice he could.

You laughed softly, turning in his arms, “I’m just having another off day, that’s all.”

“Why?” he cocked his head to one side like a puppy.

You inhaled deeply and let out your breath in a sigh, pulling away from his grasp to sit down on the edge of your shared bed, “What Kaito said earlier, and then this guy at the restaurant was--”

“Guy?” Seokmin asked immediately, going to sit next to you and hold one of your hands in both of his. “There was a guy? What guy? What did he do?”

“Seokmin, calm down,” you let out a little laugh, using your free hand to card through his hair. He nuzzled into your touch, visibly relaxing. “He didn’t do anything, he just made some…dumb comments.”

“About what?” he asked, his eyes intently looking at you. “Did he say something that upset you?”

You shrugged, “He said I wasn’t pretty…”

He frowned, releasing your hand to cup your cheeks, “_____, you are pretty; you’re beautiful, in fact.”

“I know you think so,” you told him, “I just wish I thought so.”

“Come here,” he smiled -- a little too mischievously to be sweet -- and laid you down on the bed, your head resting on the pillows. He pulled off your shorts, making your cheeks blush bright pink. “I’ll show you every beautiful thing about you.”

“Seokmin,” you almost whined, knowing where this was headed. “Kaito’s downstairs!”

“You’re quiet,” he pointed out with a chuckle, “no matter how hard I try to get you to not be.”

He started off by pressing a soft, sweet kiss to your lips before he let them travel your body, kissing every inch of your skin as he whispered how beautiful he thought you were, making sure to go teasingly slow. He removed your bra and kissed over your breasts, rumbling happily at the soft noises you made before continuing down your body. When he reached the waistband of your underwear, he kissed along the skin above it as he tugged the material down.

Instead of moving his mouth down to where you wanted him, he started to kiss back up your body. You almost whined at him, but then you felt a finger slip into you, and you immediately shut up. His lips kissed over the expanse of your chest before moving up to your neck, slowly moving his finger in and out and listening to the soft sighs fall from your lips.

“Even the noises you make are beautiful,” he told you softly, smiling against your skin. “I love how quiet they are because it means only I can hear them.”

When he felt you were wet enough, he added another finger, curling them slightly. Your hands searched for something to hold onto other than the sheets, and they soon gripped your mate’s shoulders as your eyes fluttered closed.

Steadily, he picked up speed, his lips traveling to your ear, is teeth grazing it and making you shiver. “Never listen to any bad thing somebody tells you. You’re more than amazing, _____, and I won’t let you think otherwise.”

“I love you,” you breathed out, followed by a quiet moan.

His inner wolf grumbled happily, the noise vibrating in his chest and against your side, “I love you more.”

Seokmin pressed the warm pad of his thumb to your clit, rubbing circles into the bud of nerves and making you cling to him, hiding your face in the crook of his neck while your hand that went around to the back of his neck gently tugged on the hairs there. He growled softly, his red eyes looking down your body to where his fingers disappeared inside you.

“I’ve never met anyone as perfect as you in my life,” he told you, kissing your shoulder.

You let out a soft but high whine as your hips raised to meet the thrusts of his fingers, your walls clenching around his digits. He pulled back a little, wanting to watch you when you finally reached your high.

“Are you close, darling?” he asked quietly.

You nodded in reply, your eyes desperately looking into his as your nails lightly dug into his skin.

“Do you believe me now?” he smiled warmly, his red eyes twinkling despite their menacing color.

You nodded again.

He pressed a sweet kiss to your lips, mumbling against them, “Then cum for me.”

He pulled away just as you reached your high, his eyes studying every twitch of your face as your toes curled, and you hugged Seokmin tighter. He’d never seen a more beautiful sight in his life, and he only wished you could see yourself like this too. You’d never doubt yourself if you saw what he did.

Once your muscles relaxed and he’d gotten you through your orgasm, he pulled his fingers away and playfully put them in his mouth, wiggling his eyebrows at you as he tasted you.

“Stop!” you giggled, gently pushing at his chest.

He removed his fingers and kissed your cheek, hugging you to him tightly, “Did I make my point?”

“As always, you win,” you sighed happily, nuzzling into his warm chest.

“I love you, my darling,” he sang, burying his face in your hair.

This time, you were the one to reply with, “I love you more.”

407 notes · View notes

thefallenbibliophilequote · 4 years

Text

If you’ll have me

Bucky x insecure!reader

Summary: my entry to “The Other Punk’s 500 Writing Challenge” by the lovely @buckys-other-punk I chose the prompt: “I want you to remember: you deserve this”

The reader moves to the avengers compound, she soon learns how easy it is to fall for a certain supersoldier and how easy it is to give into the lies your brain tells you, and how hard it is to see your own worth in a building full of superheroes.

Warning: panic attacks, self-image issues, anxiety, bad writing, fluff of course, all the themes from the 2012 avengers mindset, endgame!steve is non-existent and everyone is alive bc wow I changed the timeline!

Word count: 4,677

A/N: this prompt could have gone in a spideypool comic kinda way- sarcastic and witty and funny; Or in the direction that I took, I’m at a rough spot so I decided to write the kind of fic that I could use right now. This is the first time I’m sharing my writing, to anyone. So hopefully my nerves won’t be the death of me.

A/N 2: so, I planned this to be around 2k but it got out of hand and the characters did whatever they wanted, I had no control and so the plot is different than what I originally thought.

—

You can’t say no to Tony Stark, you learned that very early on in your friendship. It was absolutely impossible. So when he out of the blue showed up at your apartment at 2am with a request to move out of your house and into the Avengers compound… you knew there was no way out.

Unlike your best friend, you were more introverted, the thought of moving into a big compound full of superheroes and gods was scary for a civilian. But tony needed you, and you are nothing if not loyal to him.

Ever since the fight between tony and Steve, he told you how lonely he felt in the big tower, after they made peace and settled back into the tower- even though they talked it out and were understanding, tony wanted you around.

“It’s to ease the tension, you are easy to get along with, they will all love you. And you got me to talk about my emotions so maybe you could help them. A little normal in our chaotic life, it’s purely logical.” He said to you, but you could read him better than that. Yes, his argument was logical, but he just wanted a friend.

So of course, you agreed. Working for Pepper was so much better than your old stupid job, she was an angel compared to your mean boss. So a month later you moved into the compound and settled in with Pepper on your new job as her assistant.

When you first met the infamous Winter Soldier he was back from a visit to Wakanda just a few days after you moved in. You noticed his left arm was different from what you’ve seen on the news- it was now black and a little golden, no red star in sight.

He was laughing with The Falcon and ran his fingers through his short hair when tony walked with you into the common room his arm around your shoulder as you walked towards the two avengers. Tony told you everything, so you knew about their past and while he told you how they both decided to move on from that you where still a little nervous.

“Y/N meet: Birdie and Spiky.” Tony gestured forward as he took you to meet the two avengers “Guys, this is the incredible Y/N.”

“I’m Sam, pleasure to meet you.” He nodded to you and shook your hand “this is Spiky.”

“Spiky? Really Tony, you could do better than that, my hair is not that spiky.” He shook his head but you could hear the amusement in his voice. That was a good sign you thought, but that was before he looked at you and you saw his eyes, the blue piercing through your soul. “I’m Bucky.”

“Y/N” you raised your left hand to shake his, you could see a slight tension forming in his eyes as he raised his vibranium hand to meet yours, eyes studying you. You smiled at him.

He flashed you a smile that made your heart skip a bit. This is definitely going to be a problem.

“Are you a new recruit?” Sam had asked you then.

“Oh no, I’m just a friend.” You looked at tony with a smirk “apparently this guy can’t function without me so I decided to move here, for the sake of saving the world from the worst cook ever.”

“It was one time Y/N! I did not mean to blow up your microwave.” Tony looked betrayed as he looked at you.

“I present to you one of the world’s greatest mechanics ladies and gentlemen!” you waved your hands towards Tony. You could see the amusement in his eyes, giving in his failed look of annoyance.

“I already regret my decision,” he groaned and rolled his eyes at you. “I hate you.”

“No you don’t.”

“Well, it was very nice to meet you Y/N,” Bucky redirected the conversation to you again, A sincere look on his face. “I hope we will see you around more then.”

“Unfortunately, we have to go, Cap is waiting for us.” Sam nodded towards you and Tony. You returned a goodbye before tony swept you away to show you his new project.

“What was it back there lover boy?” Sam teased Bucky when you were out of earshot. Bucky looked back at you and shook his head.

“Don’t know what you are talking about, Wilson.”

“Sure” Sam laughed at him but let it go.

As much as you hated to admit that tony was right, it didn’t take long for the team to warm up to you and take you as one of their own. Two weeks later and you found your place there. Natasha and you became quite close as you, Wanda, and Pepper occasionally had girls night.

Tony was smug all day long when one day at the lab Bruce told you that you’re very calming to have around. When Steve and Sam agreed and said it could have a good effect on the team Tony’s smugness somehow increased. It was very annoying. No one should ever let Tony be proved right.

Thor was the biggest puppy you have ever met, basically a Labrador. You found out his slight obsession with pop tarts, and you took it on yourself to educate him on some pop culture because let’s be honest who would turn down an opportunity to watch your favorite movies with someone who wouldn’t object to any of them. When you one time watched the Sherlock Holmes movie with Thor and Steve came in and said he didn’t watch it, you decided it is absolutely essential to have a movie night. You found Clint in the vents shouting an agreement to you.

Even though you managed to befriend Thor, Loki and you soon became good friends. He appreciated your skill of lie detecting and you two often sat and read books together.

Then there was Bucky, your friendship started to form when you joined in on a prank on Sam. You and Bucky ran so fast, dying of laughter, as Sam chased you around with his brand new sparkly pink wings.

From there you friendship blossomed, but to your dismay so did your little crush. It started from invitations to go on walks, to him coming to your door in the dead of the night in seek for comfort after a nightmare. You always let him in. you’d listen to him if he wanted you to, and you distracted him when he didn’t.

Your best friend never showed up to breakfast so you’d sit next to Bucky instead. In movie nights you found Bucky saving you a seat next to him every time until he didn’t have to, it was a silent agreement amongst the team.

You never would have expected the next development though: Bucky was a cuddler. It started small, a hand on the small of your back in the morning when he entered the kitchen. Then an arm in the dark around your shoulder, stroking your arm as you all sat and watched a movie.

“Can I just maybe lie down?” he asked one night. It was 3am and the dark circles under his eyes made your heart ache. You just nodded but were surprised at his actions. You assumed he meant to lie down on the bed rather than sitting against the headboard. He lowered himself on the bed and put his head on your thighs and began to talk to you. You got over your momentary shock to listen to what he wants to talk about, absentmindedly you found yourself stroking his short hair. It was soft and from his content sigh he seemed to enjoy it too.

Imagine the Fourth of July. Now, imagine it with a bit more… Tony. That’s exactly what happened to Steve’s birthday party. Tony told you all about what he was planning weeks before, and you two worked about it endlessly since then. You were a bit annoyed at first, it was way too extravagant to your taste but now that you’re standing at the entrance, looking down from the stairs at all the people there, you couldn’t help but feel proud. The people there varied, from the avengers to the agents you didn’t recognize and all sorts of people who you assumed were high profiled? Never the one to initiate a conversation with a stranger you went ahead to the bar to try and find Tony.

Instead, at the bar you found Natasha who sat there with a drink, scaring away anyone who tried to bother her, you of course she welcomed.

“I’m so glad you came! I know it’s not really your thing but this place looks amazing, so is your dress!” Natasha gashed at you.

“You look absolutely incredible Nat!” you took in her tight short stress and how well she looked in it, she was your friend but you could feel the discomfort start to grow. You smoothed down your skirt. “Do you know where tony is?”

“he is probably talking to some rich assholes who are leaning in to his every word” she joked with you, “I think I saw him with our birthday boy so maybe you should ask him.” She nodded to behind you.

“Steve! Happy birthday!” you rushed to hug him. “How do you like the party?”

“Well, tony sure has expensive taste, it’s lovely Y/N.” America’s golden boy smiled at you.

“Speaking of tony, have you seen him?”

“Yeah, he was actually looking for you earlier, he’s right there.” Steve pointed to the other side of the room where tony stood with Pepper, surrounded by a group of people.

With a short thank you, you attempted to make your way there, casting tens of apologies as you tried to shuffle through the dancing crowd. From the corner of your eye you spotted Bucky, sitting on the couch next to a girl who was basically sitting in his lap, you saw the smile on his face, you never saw that kind of smile on him before. In an attempt to ignore the twist in your stomach, you continued pushing people until you found Tony, surrounded by a whole new group now. When he noticed you and the look on your face, he whispered to Pepper who then diverted the conversation away from Tony- who slipped away towards you.

“Hey darling, I tried to find you earlier.” He told you as he gave you a hug.

“It took me a little longer to get ready I guess.” You looked behind you to see Bucky still with that girl, you adjusted your dress.

Tony took in your actions. He knew you too well.

“Do you want to go outside, a little bit of fresh air could help?”

“No, no you love these parties! I can’t take you away from that.” You dismissed it quickly.

“Well fine, if you want me to enjoy it so much then dance with me.” He dragged you to the DJ and you heard him ask for a couple of slower songs, and then dragged you to the middle of the dance floor. You heard your favorite song playing and tony enveloped you in his arms, immediately comforting you. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“There isn’t really much to talk about, you know how sometimes these parties can trigger me. Sometimes it can make a person like me feel a bit inadequate I guess.” You leaned your head on his chest.

“You’re better than all of these people sweetheart, you’re my best friend tell me who made you feel like this and I will personally give them a free ride to Antarctica.” You could see him doing that which made you laugh.

“With all the penguins? That sounds fun though.” You argued.

“Oh you’re right. I guess I’ll have to think of a different place then. Do you think Barnes would like the desert? I mean with that metal arm it must heat up-”

“Wait what? Why would you say Bucky?” that sneaky son of a bitch.

“Come on, I saw you look at him, did he make you feel bad?” tony looked you in the eyes this time, sincere.

“No,” you shrugged. “I just saw Nat and all these beautiful agents and then I saw him with one and I guess it just made me feel bad way too fast. He didn’t do anything wrong.”

Some days were worse than others, some days it was just a few passing thoughts, some it was thunder and dark lingering clouds.

“Well, there isn’t a point in me telling you how gorgeous you are because you will never believe me, even though you are and I should probably get you an eye doctor, maybe schedule something with Dr. Cho. Anyway, if this is because of Barnes, then I can assure you he only has eyes for you.”

“I don’t need an eye doctor!” you hit his arm and laughed, before putting your head back on his chest. “And about the other thing, I doubt that. I think maybe he should be with someone more like him, which makes more sense.” You still looked around, not seeing Bucky anywhere.

“I don’t think you should make any sort of decision when you’re this anxious. I don’t think you’re capable of clear judgment in this situation darling.” He said to you quietly, worried overtones in his voice.

“I’m fine Tony, I’m not that anxious.”

“your hands are shaking Y/N…” as he told you that, you looked at the hand you put on his chest, his hand now cradled it as you saw it shaking. How did you not notice it? When tony saw as you realized what was happening he knew there was no room for argument. “I’m taking you away.”

You put up no fight as he quickly managed to take you away without drawing too much attention. You didn’t see Bucky searching for you in the crowd after that.

Bucky sat there on the couch, happy for his best friend as he enjoyed his party. He was smiling uncomfortably as the girl next to him scooted closer to him. His mental health got a lot better, and his confidence grew- he felt the man he once was but newer, most of the time. Big crowds still managed to get to him though. He nodded along to the girl next to him who refused to call him anything but James, he tried to be polite. He hated the crowds, you would know that. He thought. Then he heard your favorite song playing from the far side of the room, there he finally saw you, dancing with Tony. He knew tony was your best friend, but he still felt a tug at his heart as you put your head near his arc reactor.

He has been pondering on when to tell you about his feelings for you, confident that you wouldn’t turn him down. The two of you grew so close, you were an absolute angel to him. He saw you hit Tony’s arm and suddenly his smile turned genuine. He knew you felt the same way as him, it was hard to ignore. You seemed almost as happy as he is when the two of you are alone. Maybe he could tell you tonight.

“James? Are you even listening to me?” the girl called him.

“Yes, sorry, your name is August right?” she nodded at him. “Sorry but I have to go, I have a couple of things to do.” He got up then and went towards where he last saw you, but you where nowhere to be found.

The next day tony seemed to be stuck at your side, you tried to tell him that you’re fine but he insisted to “borrow you from Pepper because he needs an assistant.” Or so he claims. Apparently he needed an assistant to buy him ice cream in your favorite flavor or to cook him a meal which coincidentally happens to be your favorite desert- to give him credit he did try to help but he might have tried to mix the eggs with the flour and got it all over the counter. You burst into a fit of laughter and he told F.R.I.D.A.Y to order pizza. So, the two of you sat in the kitchen with your pizza, after cleaning the place.

“I might have to borrow you from Pepper more often, you are a great assistant.”

“Yeah, sure” you played along before setting your pizza down. “Thank you Tony.”

“Anytime” He smiled at you through a mouthful of pizza.

The kitchen door opened, and in stumbled Steve and Bucky, who for once slept in today.

“Well hello boys, what got you looking so bad?” Tony smirked at them.

“It’s all Thor’s fault, he brought the Asgardian mead.” Steve said, you laughed at his hangover state, it was rare but precious.

“Hey doll, I didn’t get to talk to you yesterday, couldn’t find you.” He smiled at you, his rough voice nearly killed you- you were certain. You looked over at tony as you stumbled over what to say.

“We left early, she claimed I was too drunk and should get some air.” He winked at you “isn’t she just the best Barnes?” he then looked at Bucky; you swear you hated him sometimes.

“An absolute angel,” Bucky replied, assessing tony. “But you seem okay enough.”

“Yes well I tried telling her, but she insisted.” Tony easily replied and matched Bucky’s stare.

“How did you manage to get him to actually listen to you Y/N? That’s impressive.” Steve commented, oblivious to the slight tension as he made coffee.

“Years of practice I guess, it is hard to accomplish because he sure can be an ass sometimes.” You kicked Tony under the table to look at you. He only smiled.

“Capcicle doesn’t like that kind of language Y/N.” you heard Steve groaning as he put a coffee cup in front of Bucky who was seated next to you, and sat in front of him next to tony.

“That happened years ago Tony!”

“Doll, I was wondering if you wanted to watch a movie later maybe?” Bucky leaned in to ask you, before you could answer though, Steve spoke up.

“Why is there flour on the counter?”

“On your ass too, you picked the wrong chair.” Tony helpfully chimed in “you know, those pants do nothing for your ass.”

“Tony messed up the kitchen, I guess we didn’t clean it all.” You said apologetically and got up. “I actually have a lot of things to do for Pepper today, since tony stole me, so I should probably go start on that.” You exited the room, looking forward to a distraction at work.

“Tony, you know you shouldn’t cook!” Steve patted the chair, and then sat on it again.

“Hey, I was only trying to help Y/N in baking a cake, I had good intentions!” tony defended.

“Why was she making a cake in the afternoon?”

“Relax Barnes, I asked her to bake me a cake but when it tragically somehow blew up we settled on pizza.” Tony lifted up his slice of pizza in proof. “Why do you care anyway?”

“What kind of question is that?” Bucky looked at him quizzically. “Tony, is there some sort of a problem?”

“I’m just asking, why do you care about her?” Steve noticed the change in the question but Bucky just looked confused.

“I care about her because she is my friend, just like the rest of you here!” Bucky was getting angry by the second, where was this all coming from?

“Yes, but do you care about her only as a friend?” tony asked and this time Bucky noticed the change and his anger all melted away.

“No.” he admitted, not bothering to hide it. “Were you just trying to get me to confess my feelings?”

“They learn things so fast, don’t they Steve?” he looked at an amused Steve who just nodded.

“Even I couldn’t get him to say something. Good job Tony.”

“Okay, I am leaving, this is clearly an ambush.” Bucky left the kitchen then.

Bucky was headed to his room to clear his head, hoping you won’t be as busy tomorrow. He was in the hallway when he passed your room, it was then that he heard your TV on; he recognized the theme song of Brooklyn Nine-Nine playing. Why were you watching TV when you said you’re working? Bucky went to his room and decided to let it go.

For the next week Bucky studied your moves carefully. You started to avoid going out with him, making excuses that he could easily read as lies. At night you accepted him with open arms to talk about his nightmares, but he noticed you smiled less now. When movie night came along he found the seat next to him empty as you sat next to tony, he wasn’t the only one to notice it. That was it for him.

“Nat,” he found Natasha the next day alone in the common room. “Do you know if Y/N is upset with me?”

“Probably, yes, I don’t know why though.” Natasha shrugged.

“I don’t know what I did, she is still nice to me but she avoids even being in the same room as me.” Bucky sat next to her. The assassin put her book down finally and paid attention to Bucky. “I don’t know what to do; I can’t accuse her of anything. I just feel something is wrong. We were really close.”

“I’m sure it’s nothing major, you should talk to her.” Natasha put her hand on his, to try and comfort her friend. She’s seen the way you looked at each other, it was impossible to miss the connection.

You entered the room, unaware of the conversation until you looked up and the two avengers stopped talking and looked at you, but you looked at the position they were in, you were clearly interrupting a private conversation.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t realize you were here. Sorry, I’ll leave you two alone.” You exited the room before Bucky even stood up, he came to seat back down but Nat kicked him.

“What are you doing? Go and talk to her!” she all but commanded him. He wasn’t going to fight Natasha, that’s just a lost cause.

You were safe in your room, it was all fine. Everything was fine. You couldn’t have expected that falling for an avenger would be a good idea. They are different from you, you’re just… you. They are superheroes. Everyone in the building is either a highly trained agent or one of the top scientists in the world. You were just Tony’s friend, here to support him and maybe bring some normalcy to the superheroes. How could you possibly compete with all that? Your lungs felt too tight, it’s like you could barely breathe.

“Miss Y/N I am recognizing symptoms of a possible panic attack, would you like me to call Mr. Stark?” F.R.I.D.A.Y called to you, snapping you out of your daze.

“No, don’t call tony, or anyone, can you just talk me through breathing?” the AI complied until you managed to calm down and get your breathing right. Bless Tony Stark, anxiety can fuck off.

“Miss, Sergeant Barnes is requesting to open the door; I have shut it alongside any outside noise, would you like me to lift it?”

“Yes F.R.I.D.A.Y, thank you.” You could handle it. You opened the door to see a frustrated Bucky. “Hi Bucky, what do you need?”

Bucky just stepped right into your room and shut the door behind him.

“I need you to tell me what did I do wrong?”

“What? You didn’t do anything wrong.” You were confused now.

“Then why the hell are you avoiding me? I thought you were happy, I thought you wanted me around.” Oh, how could you explain this to him without him taking pity on you?

“Of course I want you around Bucky, it’s okay it’s not that. I’m just giving you space. It’s alright.” You tried to assure him, while also hoping you could convince yourself.

“Giving me space? Doll I don’t want space away from you. Why are you pulling away from me?” he reached for your hand, his metal arm trying to bring you closer.

“Bucky, really it’s alright. Just let this go.” You pleaded him.

“No it’s not alright, I’m not alright. Because the woman I’m in love with is pushing me away and I don’t know what to do to bring her back to me!” He confessed to you, the frustration in his voice gave away to the longing look in his blue eyes.

“You- you what?” you stopped trying to resist him, your shock letting him pull you closer, he was holding both your arms now, keeping you close.

“I’m in love with you. Is it really that hard to believe?” He questions, his voice low now, as if someone might hear, and he wanted to keep this intimate moment just for the two of you.

“No.” you said before collecting yourself. “No, you can’t be in love with me.”

“Of course I can, it’s really easy to fall for you doll.” Bucky huffed a laugh. “I thought you felt the same way, do you?”

“I…” Could you really lie to a supersoldier? Would you lie to Bucky? “I do. Of course I do, but you don’t understand. Bucky, you’re a superhero, a supersoldier. I’m on the other hand just a girl with too much anxiety who happens to have the best friend in the world which is why I was even allowed to live here in the first place. You deserve so much better Bucky, you really do. And I- I don’t deserve you.” You hang your head low, if only he could realize that, it will hurt less. Your eyes were watering but you blinked them shut.

Bucky’s right hand came to your chin and held it up. You are an absolute idiot. Bucky mused at what you said.

“Doll, if there is one thing that I learned in therapy is that even after everything I did, I can still become the man I want to be and I deserve to get happiness. You make me so happy doll, you really do. But you deserve happiness too. Tell me, do I make you happy?”

“Yes, very much. But-”

“No. You deserve all the love and happiness in the world and if you’ll have me, I promise to keep you happy, always. I know I can’t solve anxiety, I have it too. But you help me with it, so I’ll do whatever I can to help you.”

You looked into the sea in his eyes, trying to find any doubt, but all you found was determination to make you understand, to make you believe it. And for a moment you did. That was all it took.

“If you’ll have me, I promise to make you happy and make sure you are loved, always.” You whispered. “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me, I just- I want you to remember, you deserve this. Whether it’s happiness with me or with someone else. You deserve to be loved by your friends, and if it’s here than this is your home and we’re your family. You deserve love and support and if it’s me then please, will you have me?”

“Yes. I don’t want anyone else.”

The next thing you knew, his lips crushed into yours, pouring out all of your emotion to the kiss. This feels right, this is right. Maybe you’re worthy of a happy ending after all. Maybe you’ll find it right here, in this compound, with Bucky.

Little did you know, in the far away land that is Tony’s messy lab, F.R.I.D.A.Y notified him per his request about your panic attack. Now, with the monitors turned on, he watched the two of you with a smile at his lips.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y? Tell Steve he owes me 20 bucks.”

#bucky #bucky x reader #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #writing challenge #fluff #bucky x insecure!reader #bucky fluff #otherpunks500 #my writing

963 notes · View notes

twst-campos13 · 4 years

Note

ah hello!! i'm literally so excited to see a blog for enby and male readers sodjfoijf,,could i maybe request a scenario where male reader is a staff member (idk?? like a librarian?? a nurse??? do they need nurses over there???) and is crushing on crewel but is too scared to confess because he's both Too Dense to pick up any signs of potential reciprocation and also just isn't sure if crewel likes men??? maybe. maybe with a happy ending though because i am a fool,, thank you very much!!

One hopelessly cheesy scenario coming up!! Thank you for requesting! I hope you don’t mind I made reader a librarian who may or may not be a bit of a romantic because i listened to a particular playlist while writing this- (commentary in notes!)

Warnings: none! Tags: male!reader, fluff!

A simple man such as you live a simple life. As simple as life can be in Night Raven College, that is. A prestigious school that holds a student body that can barely tolerate each other. It would be typical for a librarian to be the observer than the observed, but hey, if it means getting out of trivial matters of the school and enjoying the show in your personal bubble, then you have no complaints.

This attitude of yours did come to have its own consequences. You were seen as timid by most students as you were quite closed-off, taking it as a reason to poke fun at you sometimes. You proved them wrong when they step out of line with their fun. Most of the time you choose to ignore them. However, you lived up to your introverted nature, especially when it comes to him.

Tall, dark, and handsome. Approachable but also not at the same time. Sharply dressed and sharp attitude. This man that visits the library ever so often had become your daily motivation to keep on working at this school despite the wage that Crowley gives you.

Divus Crewel, feared and admired by staff and students—also known as the man who stole your heart.

You feel so small compared to him. That would not be so farfetched. He is a remarkable man, and what about you? You are just a librarian at this school. You are like mere dust to him.

Yet, despite this, you continued yearning for him no matter how ridiculous it seems. Perhaps you have fallen too deep in romantic fiction that you make hopeless wishes. You are known to be excellent in reading people but for some reason, you find it hard to read Divus. His perfect posture whenever he would scan the Applied Sciences aisle showed that he is focused on his reading. However, it is his expression you find hard to decipher. He looks dashing as ever, of course, but his thin lips and neutral gaze makes it hard for you to know what he is thinking.

If your life is a novel it would be so easy to know what runs in his mind. What he feels for you. Maybe he could even know what you feel for him. In a story, what makes characters likable is knowing what their emotions, their feelings, their ambitions, and their dreams are, for they are already laid out in ink on pages. Implicit or explicit information, simple or complex structure of personality, it does not matter. You would easily know about them for they are just sentences away from understanding.

And in romance novels…oh, how dreamy they are. How easy they make it seem to fall in love, to confess, and to achieve a happy ending. However, as a librarian, you know the reality of your situation. Your relationship with Crewel is a professional. Strictly, if you were to add an adjective. Is it really strictly professional? Your right brain points out the moments in your life where you interacted with him. At faculty meetings, reunions, at the library…moments like those just feel surreal you almost believed that you made those up on your own. Probably because you initiated each of those interactions yourself.

The only time, where Crewel would come to you himself, are rare. One time he came to the library and checked out a book to read in his spare time. His voice distracted you. It was like cherry wine. Sweet, smooth, enough to make your throat dry and your cheeks flushed. Oh, you could listen to him talk for hours in that tone of his, and he could even make you do anything he pleases.

You greet each other good morning or good afternoon when you pass by each other, and he would smile a teasing one at you as if you two shared a secret with each other. Well, technically you did, for one time you bought him coffee under the pouring rain, and he repaid you for your kindness. Soon enough your coffee exchange became a routine for both of you. It was sweeter than the cream in his coffee. It was more refreshing than the rainy day you shared with each other.

His gaze. His posture. His voice. His smile. Despite those small interactions with each other you are still troubled by what he thinks of you. A friend? A colleague? A special someone? Why is this so hard? Why was it so easy to fall in love? And when things could not get worse for you, your left brain argued that he might not be interested to mingle with a man.

Well, you could find out for yourself, but that would be creepy. Your workspace is in the library! You could not just leave when you please just so you can observe him. You could not use the staff files to your advantage—that is being a borderline stalker. Whatever Crewel’s orientation is, is his to keep and his to disclose to you. Oh, but still. If this were a novel, you could easily analyze the situations that give off evidence of him liking men. Or liking someone like you.

If that were the case you would not have a hard time trying to decipher his words, his gaze, his tone, and his actions towards you. If that were the case…if that were the case…then…well, there’s no then. Divus Crewel is not a fictional character to analyze. He is your coworker, your colleague.

It is hard to know what he thinks of you, at all. You really wished that you could…but the thought of knowing what he thinks to scare you, as well.

Rejection is not that far from reality. Who are you compared to him again? A nobody. A simple, ‘timid’, librarian that enjoys reading romantic and fiction novels and inserts himself in scenarios he makes up for himself just so he can…find the happiness he wishes to have.

But Divus is your happiness. Became your source of happiness. Ironic how he colors the muted floor of the library with his monochromatic appearance. Maybe it is better that you keep your feelings to yourself. You avoid the risk of rejection and humiliation as well as ruining whatever it is your current relationship with Crewel is.

You barely registered the visitor in front of your desk until a familiar red leathery gloved hand rested atop of yours. The contact of the leather sent a spark of electricity through you that you snapped your head up to meet alluring silvery blue eyes. There is only one person in this college that owns those distinct, beautiful, silvery blue eyes.

Divus.

“Have I interrupted your moment of peace, sir?” He asked in that cherry wine voice of his. It made your throat dry up and your face warm. “N-No—no!” You squeaked, shaking your head to brush off the embarrassment. Quickly, you fixed your composure and appeared presentable. As presentable as you could be under his stare that is. You just hope that he found some amusement in your haste. “D-Div—Mr. Crewel, what can I do for you?” You smiled as you speak in a professional tone. The edge of his lips curled into a familiar smirk and still you could not determine what was running through his mind at the moment.

“I came to return the book I borrowed last week,” he said, placing down the novel on your desk. Sense and Sensibility. Jane Austen. Right, he borrowed that last week. It is not your place to judge whatever it is he desires to read. “Of course,” you nodded, “did you enjoy reading it?” You started on a small talk as you take out your logbook for the check-ins and outs of books. “Somewhat,” Crewel shrugged, “I had my eyes set on another book I would like to borrow.”

“Oh? What is it? I’ll go get it for you.” You stood up after sliding the logbook back to its drawer. Crewel did not leave from where he was standing. His eyes were simply on you. You had to hide your nervousness under his gaze. “I had my eyes on it ever since that rainy day, when you offered me shelter in the library until the rain passes,” he mused. “General fiction, I believe, was the genre.”

“If that’s the case then you better tell me the title,” you joked, taking a stool to the genre’s aisle. “Are you certain you can find it?” Crewel coolly challenged. You almost laughed but did not fight the smile on your lips. “Mr. Crewel, I spend most of my time in this library. I know every book and I still have the Dewey Decimal system memorized…” You kept your eyes distracted by scanning the spines of the books on the shelves. You are aware that he is still looking at you that is why you refused to look back at him. You are not sure what will happen if you look back at him while conversing.

“If that is the case—” why does he suddenly sound a bit close? “—may you find ‘How to Ask your Dense Colleague Out to Dinner?’”

What a lengthy title. It sounds very basic and almost like a rule book than a novel. Well, that is General Fiction for you. Though you are quite unsure if such a book exists in the library. “Hm…” you hummed, a finger on your chin, as your eyes scanned the shelves. “I don’t think I have that here…Crowley pays me enough to support my rent and meals, but not enough to buy new books. Plus, the students…”

You heard him chuckle beside you and fought the urge to turn to him. “I believe I was not frank enough. Ah, well, I will put all subtleties aside, then…”

His warm breath tickling your skin was what made you finally turn to him. The proximity of your noses startled you that you nearly stumbled out of your stool if it were not for Divus’ hand grabbing yours to pull you to him. You gasped, shocked, as you landed close to his chest. His other hand supported your waist, and your eyes widened his silvery blues. You can feel your heart hammering against his. Your legs feel like putty when he gave you that teasing smirk. Your name—your first name—sounds surreal from his lips. Your entire world was a confusing mix of vertigo and bright lights.

“Will you go to dinner with me?”

You stared. You stammered. You are flabbergasted and flustered. You were unsure how to react to such a forward question that your brain completely shut down. But you cannot embarrass yourself—you must not. Not when…not when…not when…!

Oh, he will he stop saying your name with such sentiment?

“Is your silence a rejection or a consideration?” He rose a brow and your face flushed even more. “No! I mean yes—I mean—no, it isn’t a rejection—”

“Then you have been anticipating this?”

“Divus!”

He laughed. He laughed at your state. He laughed at your awkwardness. But most importantly his laugh sounds so pleasant. Like he was teasing you and you liked him teasing. You grew shy, averting your gaze from his and fidgeting with your fingers. “I mean…I mean…why?”

Crewel stopped laughing and looked at you. “Why what?”

“Why…me? Out of all people?” You asked as fear and denial keep you from grasping the fact that this is all real and not another scenario you made up during rainy days. Crewel’s face remained passive. Neutral. It was eating at your heart and you just wish what is going through his mind.

“Is it not obvious, puppy?” He raised a brow at you. The hand holding your wrist now tilted your chin in his direction. “It is not by fate or destiny, but a mere law that dictates the gravitational pull of similar atoms that is programmed by the need to chemically bind together.”

You suddenly felt stumped. “W—What?”

“I like you, puppy,” Crewel clarified, adoring the way your confusion turned to pure surprise, “and I would like to have dinner with you. Perhaps another, if the first went well.”

You need some time to process this. Your head felt so light you might pass out in his arms. Actually, you would not mind that in the slightest. His coat is just so soft it feels like heaven. A proper response of agreement failed to come to your mind so instead, you asked him again, “And what if the first does not end well?”

Crewel smiled at you. “Then we shall try again with the next dinner. Mind you, puppy, as a man of science, I am not afraid of failure if trying means more chances of perfecting my goal.”

“And what’s that goal?” You asked and physically stopped yourself from combusting when he leaned closer to you that your noses touch and you smell his cologne, and his bold scent.

“The goal to become yours.”

396 notes · View notes

redxblueihateloveyou · 3 years

Note

Hiiii!!! 💫💕🌸🥳

Can I bother with a question... I was (re)watching that zhang qiling edit (not today) - 'cause it's so cool, btw- and I wondered if Reboot Xiaoge’s your favourite one...? And if you're up to answering, what do you think about the other adaptations? Especially (our small bean) xiao yuliang's interpretation of xiaoge?

🤗🌺💐🐰💕

Hey, my precious patootie hehe ILY it always makes me very happy knowing that you rewatch my vids <3

lol dang it, I was kinda hoping to avoid this question, just because I feel like I'd find it hella hard to explain some things, but I'll try my best and hopefully it'll make some sense xD

I'll start from afar bc I wanna try to explain my reasonings, since I don't want to go without arguments into such highly debated question lolz. I talked about this a bit in my previous asks somewhere, but not broadly as to why that one guy hit all the right spots.

So throughout the books Wu Xie always does this wonderful thing, where he very tangibly describes the feeling he gets when Xiaoge is near, I mean like the aura around him. And he always somehow does it so colorful, that this mix of safety, assurance, calmness, composure and some things I can't quite put into one noun, that he brings to him, I think everyone who've read the books can recognize as this almost magical "Xiaoge feeling". It's not just the way he acts in some dangerous situations or smth like that. It's just everything. You either have it or you don't. And here goes my first argument... to me none of them, except for Huang Junjie and Yuliang have it.

I mean it's not even the obvious stuff, it's like the way they move during the action scenes, the way they even stand and hold themselves, the way they touch Wu Xie, the tone of their voices (both of which are like soothing as fuck), little things you'd think wouldn't matter, but when you watch it and all the puzzle pieces are together, you're like... fuck yeah, thats him.

Also not really that weighty of a point, but to me there's always a joy to see that the actor who plays the character not only gets what's he's playing, but also loves it, bc it's always seen on screen. Usually when some asked about the character they play and what they have in common for example they answer with obvious things like if some character is introverted they're like "well I also don't talk very much" or smth like that, you know what I mean. When I was watching interviews of Yuliang and Huang Junjie I was just smiling so much, bc they've said such things that made me go "yeah, Qiling is safe in their hands".

In Reboot case working in such close proximity with the author definitely also played a huge role here. Bc it kinda gets complicated in some aspects since the books are written from Wu Xie's point of view and you can't only base your picture on his perspective, just bc it's coming from a person who after being basically told "you're my whole world" goes "I'm just a person he randomly passes by in his long life" in his thoughts. Not only he's utterly clueless and dumb when it comes to all this, that he wouldn't notice the way Qiling looks at him and other things, its also not that kind of book, that would go "I suddenly caught poker face looking at me like I'm his whole existence" (and I honestly don't want it to be that book lmao). So you have to take into the account here stuff like what author says to get the whole picture, bc if you look at that from the point of Qiling's view for example, this shit takes a whole wild turn. So I really loved that in UN and Reboot ways of showing Qiling's feelings were well thought out and fit the timeline.

Bc it also works both ways, when it comes to other adaptations. Like Qiling is very and I mean ETREMELY hard to win over. We all know that it was a very long process of gaining his trust and even longer for him to fall for Wu Xie to the point of him being his everything. So what I want in those interpretations is for them to get at which point of their relationships what Xiaoge's behavior makes sense. I do not need any fanservice if it ruins the character, I'll just hate it. The thing that their feelings didn't come out of nowhere is what I LOVE about this ship, bc I'm not the kind of person who believes in "we love for nothing" thing and love at first sight thing (only "got hots for each other" at first sight), bc thats bull. Wu Xie became his everything after a long LONG process of getting to know each other. At the beginning tho he was the same stranger to him as everyone else. So what Reboot Qiling feels for Wu Xie is not what UN's Qiling feels for Wu Xie yet and what UN's Qiling feels for Wu Xie is not what Lost Tomb's Qiling feels for Wu Xie (which at that point was nothing). And I feel like not everyone gets the fact that you can totally wreck the character if you make him behave not the way he behaved in that particular time. Like for example, if someone would make a MDZS adaptation where at the very beginning of their relationships LZ treats WWX the way he treated him after the reincarnation just because "who cares, it's still LZ", that would be dumb af, see what I mean. So Xiaoge having a weakness for Wu Xie in part one is automatically not a Xiaoge to me, bc a huge part of his character and the thing NPSS speaks a lot about is just how IMPOSSIBLE it is for someone to catch his attention and how long it took Wu Xie to get there. So let's just say to me UN and Reboot Qilings for the first time didn't feel like some mashup or character summary/parody, they were Qilings the way they are supposed to be in that part of the story, bc it was the only times someone actually bothered to coordinate it.

Now as to why I prefer one to another. Xiaoge has this thing... the way he holds himself with other people, that is sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally suppressing.

Like everyone knows that if you're a passerby, Qiling genuinely doesn't fucking care and would in fact be pretty harsh about it in terms of treating people like they do not deserve their attention. He won't be like "please, don't bother me", he simply ignored them like an empty space. He is also like that with acquaintances who in his opinion do not deserve his respect like that girl who went hysterical, bc she was upset that he was the only one who wasn't drooling on her like all other men on the crew, Chen Wenjin, Wu Xie's uncles and etc. He's not openly disrespectful unless they trigger him in some way (usually by trying to act superior or later on for not treating Wu Xie right), but if they do, he will in fact remind them their place in sometimes a very rude way, at times humiliating them in front of ppl bc he looks younger than them and talking starts.

He's always doing things on his own terms and hates being told what to do. Like he legit scared Chen Wenjin just with a look and the tone of his voice when he said "let go", when she tried to command him on the mission and grabbed him trying to lecture him about what he should or shouldn't do. That's why Wu Erbai didn't even try anything like this and let him do whatever he needed to do and equally lead the mission in Reboot. And why the scene where Wu Xie 'commands' "Xiaoge, come back" and he immediately listens holds another special place in my heart. Bc he NEVER and I mean NEVER allows such things to ANYONE.

So here I came to a point of why despite loving them both dearly, my favorite Xiaoge is Huang Junjie.

I have this dissonance with Yuliang's version when to me in many scenes it felt like he and Wu Xie are the same age. Like if he was Xiaoge, but in his 20s. In his interactions with Chen Wenjin the dynamics was turned upside down, with him being okay with her telling him what to do and just in general the way she behaved with him. Same as like I didn't always quite believe him to be on par with older generation or even Pangzi, it just felt like he was truly younger than them. Some scenes that I do find extremely cute just don't fit book Xiaoge at all, I'm talking about some moments like his face when Wu Xie gave him food, or him pouting and many things he's done, when you were going "uwu he's a baby". He just never gives me this feeling in the books ever, not just bc he's 100 years old, but sad fact here.. bc he's simply unable to behave that way. Like in the books you'll desperately want to shower him with love, but he's just... I can't quite explain, it's very sad.

I guess it's just you know these characters, who are like hundreds years old, but look like they're 18? I think you have to be very careful with how you write those, so you could deliver that. And in UN because of some changed dynamics and scenes I straight up forgot about it, until Wu Xie threw some joke like "he's an old man" in front of a restaurant.

In Reboot Xiaoge could make Wu Erbai stutter with one move, put Yuliang's version in the same scene, I just don't think it would've worked. Like I'm trying to imagine him telling UN's Wu Erbai what to do and having troubles already haha. Same as I don't think he's capable to be genuinely mad at Wu Xie, and HJJ nailed it esp in one of my fav when Wu Xie was laughing at Pangzi's joke about him catching cold. The look he gave him and how ZYL just retreated was priceless xD. And boy could Qiling get angry with him in the books!

Otherwise I didn't have any drastic fall outs there, like with Joseph's Wu Xie and Ah Ning's death, because that was just too much of a difference, but there were still moments where it was once again this the same scene completely different emotion thing. He was more tolerable to ppl in general here, more pliable. And 50% of the time he gave me the cute lost kitten type, which I just cannot connect with the feeling he gave me in the books. His personality is a cat type 100%, but like seriously "cute baby" is the last word combination I would ever apply to book Xiaoge, but with Yuliang's version it's easily applied. So small bean he is indeed. With Joseph and in UN it works incredibly perfect to me, but the way he is in UN is at times too gentle. And there are lots of scenes where Joseph himself looked at him in a way "you're too cute, let me pinch your cheeks" kind of way, or the way he like sat down next to him on the coast, he was a bit babying him at times. I can't imagine book pingxie doing that. It's just a whole different vibe, the way he takes care of him, the way he lets him take care of him... it's...uuuuuuuuu another vibe (see, I'm so good at explaining lmao).

It's also kinda funny to me, bc HJJ who's the smallest and who irl truly a kitten never once gave me that feeling on screen for some reason. The one babied and loved by every crew and old ppl, who was cutely hiding behind ZYL's back on set, who won't sue an ex who almost ruined his career bc of how stupid she is, bc he "didn't want to hurt her", who according to staff can't even step on a fly, whom CMH was petting for several minutes after he had to hit him with a prop brick bc he didn't wanna do it lmao. I was just like.. ok, this is hilarious, bc I in fact didn't expect him to be a small bean, so watching all the bts made me go LOOOOL. Probably ZYL acting like a 3 year old helped him transform and the age difference problem got lost lmao

As for other adaptations. You know I can't watch seriously "Lost Tomb", I think some ppl probably have some nostalgic feeling about it, but I'm sorry, to me it's fucking hilarious. Like I've already said it looks like some type of twilight parody thing or smth. Soft damselle Wu Xie esp killed me, bc 1st when he ever was that, 2nd in the first book he's salty af, I don't even know this dude in this interpretation, I was like who's this. YangYang I know him from other things, I really don't think it's his role. I know the script and everything is bad. I know the costume and hair are horrendously funny, but it's just I was watching him in those action scenes and was like no... just I'm sorry but I'm not feeling it. I simply just don't know what to say about the whole thing seriously, bc I don't even know where to start. 10 episodes of some salad finished with one mutilated scene from book 6 for no reason the fact that characters are weird themselves also I can't quite tell, did they really just meet or they imply smth else lmao.. I'm sorry, but I do not get it.

I've given LT2 another try after finishing all the books and I've dropped it half way through, Cheng Yi wasn't even close to how I pictured Xiaoge in any aspect. He in fact didn't do anything OOC or off the book or anything, I just was like "not my Qiling". Happens sometimes.

Explore with the note you already know how I feel about this lol let's just forget.

P.S. To be fair here also maybe we should take into account the fact that some got luckier than other with "at which point" Xiaoge they're playing. Like for example, "Wrath of the Sea" and "Qingling Tree" books which is LT2 is not exactly you can say much about Qiling there, he trolls them there in the beginning (in a brilliant way that was totally lost in the adaptation) and he is there in "Wrath of Sea", but it's not the part that can make his character shine in any way, there's not much things happening there that would make you fall for him or get to know him; Yuliang grabbed the fattest piece bc it's middle several books, when they're always together and his character shines the most in terms of clues about past, opening up to Wu Xie and Pangzi, and there are many many events where you can get the picture of what kind of man he is; Huang Junjie grabbed my fav piece of utter devotion, where he's already fully and wholeheartedly belongs to Wu Xie, that I'm just weak for. So like... there's also that I guess xD.

#answered #jaecomments #zhang qiling #daomu biji #dmbj #lost tomb reboot #i still feel like i couldn't quite explain stuff lol #its a complicated question xD #do not kill me for my i guess weird opinions haha #huang junjie #xiao yuliang #lost tomb #pingxie

53 notes · View notes

sweethq · 4 years

Text

♡ fem!so who seems intimidating but is just shy // headcanon

❝omg hey! i love your writing and your texting fics! i was wondering if you could write headcanons of tsukishima, sugawara, tendou, and kuroo with a fem!s/o who seems really intimidating but she’s actually just really shy? thank you so much!❞

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* requested by: @chopstickcamewithalargelomein *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

𑁍 Characters: Tsukishima Kei, Sugawara Kōshi, Tendou Satori, Kuroo Testurō

»»—Trigger warning(s): none—-««

➶ Genre: hmmm fluff?

-ˏˋ A/N: Thank you for the request, love! I’m glad you enjoy my writing and texting fics! I’m sorry if this isn’t what you wanted......ˊˎ-

wow what a powerful couple

tsukishima himself is intimidating, but add you to his side, you guys are basically untouchable

you had this kind of reputation even before you guys started dating

when people would try and talk to you, you would kinda just stare at them and not respond lol

not because you want to be rude or intimidating or anything, you just don’t know what to say

you’ve never been the best with being vocal

because of this, people thought of you to be as cold as ice and to not be messed with

people would tend to avoid you when you walked through the halls or give you short glances when they thought you weren’t looking

what people didn’t know is that you’re incredibly shy and have a hard time opening up to people

you were a little hurt in the beginning just because you couldn’t help how you react in those types of situations and the fact that people would say things about you made you sad

the only person in your life who understood you was tsukishima

you met him through your mutual friend, Yamaguchi, and instantly clicked

maybe it was the fact that you both had the same stigma around you at school or maybe it was because of the attraction you each had for one another

it wasn’t a surprise to others when the two of you started dating since they saw you as basically the same person

what did surprise them, however, was how both of you slowly began to open up to others

which is weird because you wouldn’t think that two introverted people could break down each others walls very easily but it happened

he brought out the best in you, and you to him

since you became so comfortable talking to him, it slowly became easier and easier to talk to others (but it did take a lot of time and practice)

you now knew how to properly hold a conversation instead of just blankly staring at the person lol

and since you and tsukishima started dating, he has also began to show his more extraverted side that no one knew he had

at volleyball practice he is a lot more willing to give compliments and ask for feedback, something he got used to after spending time with you

he also sometimes laughs and jokes around with the other members, even Kageyama (although this is still rare)

basically you two have a relationship where you’re able to help each other build up your strengths as well as improve on your weaknesses

he’s so good for you, and even more, you’re good for him

you poor baby

all you want to do is fit in and have friends but you’re just so shy that people mistake it for something else completely

you like to keep your distance from people and sometimes feel uncomfortable holding a conversation so there’s times where you run quickly walk away just because you have no idea what else to do in that situation and you do not want to be there

soooooo you kinda have an interesting reputation

people are intimidated by you but not because you’re mean or scary, but rather because no one knows anything about you or what you’re feeling in any particular moment

this makes you even more shy and uncomfortable talking to people since everyone also seems to not want to approach you

except for one person

sugawara was in your first and fourth period classes

and oh boy, he sure was curious about the cute girl who never talks

when he heard that there was going to be a group project in your fourth period class, he made sure to ask the teacher to make you his partner

he’s just so charming that the teacher does whatever he says??

after spending so much time together, you were able to come out of your shell around him

he was the only person that you felt comfortable around and felt like you could trust him with anything

before you knew it, you fell for him

and lucky for you, he did the same

people were so confused in the beginning

they still thought of you as the girl who doesn’t want anything to do with anyone so when they find out you’re dating sugawara, an actual prince, they couldn’t believe it

how could someone like suga be with someone who was so different from himself? or so they thought

after spending more time by suga’s side in public, the sweet and caring personality that usually only he saw started to shine in other places

he likes to introduce you to new people, knowing that you really want to make more friends but are too scared to do it by yourself

the biggest step in your relationship was when you met the rest of the volleyball club

these were the people that are the most important to suga, so the thought of them not liking you or feeling intimidated by you made you incredibly nervous

luckily for you, they are a group of the most chill and understanding boys

they instantly welcomed you to their family and fully supported your relationship

being with suga allowed you to come out of your shell not only to him, but to everyone

although you’re still a relatively shy person, the stigma people once had about you no longer exists thanks to suga

poor boy knows what its like to be an outcast, i mean, kids were pretty mean to him when he was younger

soooo when he saw this cute girl in his class who didn’t seem to interact with anyone, he was intrigued

your sheltered demenour reminded him of himself in his younger days when the kids didn’t want to play volleyball with him; it reminded him of the feeling of not belonging

he knew the feeling all too well, but also knew that one person could change that for you

and he quickly decided that he was going to be that person

after what felt like a million years, you eventually let tendou inside and shared some of your deepest secrets and biggest insecurities; one of them being your extremely shy personality

as your relationship with tendou turned from a platonic one to a romantic one, he was able to help you blossom more than you ever thought possible

he didn’t necessarily help you bring out your more extraverted side, but rather helped you become more confident in who you already were as a person

people had always given you weird looks, thinking that you were so strange to not peep a word to anyone throughout basically your entire high school career

and it sure didn’t stop, even after you started dating tendou

but he was always so supportive and reassuring, and showed you that other people’s opinions about you don’t matter

who cares if people are intimidated by you because you’re shy??

as long as you’re comfortable with the person that you are and you’re happy, who gives a damn??

not to mention that he never fails to mention how much he adores you and your shy personality

and the whole shiratorizawa volleyball club loves you and is happy that tendou has you and vice versa

basically tendou allowed you to see yourself in a different light and show you that you’re perfect the way you are, no matter what anyone else thinks

i imagine him to react to this situation similar to the way tendou did even though they had different childhoods

kuroo only had two close friends growing up (you and kenma), but he didn’t really feel like an outcast and even if he did, he didn’t really care

he always kinda had the “who cares what other people think” kind of attitude, which is what he always stood by

since this was the only ideology that he knew, he was super confused when you would start telling him about how you were sad because people at school found you intimidating even though you’re just incredibly shy

he didn’t understand the logic of being affected by the words of other people who don’t even know you

nonetheless, he comforted you and continued to tell you all the things he loves most about you

and even accidentally slipped a confession in there oops

this man really has a way with words

so after the two of your started dating and he was able to actually tell you how he feels about you, he nEVER STOPS

like he’s so whipped for you and thinks you’re too perfect, so when others start making you feel uncomfortable with who you are, it makes him want to explode

he makes it a point to tell you every single day that he loves you for who you are and that he would never want you to change because of what others might say or feel

just wants you to love yourself and feel more confident in your skin

eventually you do become more confident in who you are, especially with kuroo always by your side, giving you loads of encouragement

you’re able to smile and joke around more when you’re in school, which makes people feel less intimidated when they see you actually express emotions lol

you’re just thankful that you have kuroo to show you unconditional love and even teach you to love yourself

#haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu!!#hq #haikyuu social media #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu writers #kuroo testuro #tsukishima kei #sugawara koushi #tendou satori #kuroo x reader #tsukishima x reader #sugawara x reader #tendou x reader

588 notes · View notes

en-worlds · 4 years

Text

first and hopefully last love

➵ sunghoon x gender neutral reader

➵ established relationship, ice skating date, honeymoon phase relationship

➵ 1012 words, lowercase intended

➵ warnings: none that i could think of

➵ fourth member for my valentine’s with enhypen series

➵ a/n: sunghoon is already retired from figure skating but he’ll live forever in my brain, this was kind of a late upload as i am currently drowning in schoolworks ;___;

“this one or this one?” sunghoon asks you while holding two very similar looking bucket hats. “sunghoon, they’re both black hats. they look pretty much the same,” you sigh. you’ve already finished dressing up and see sunghoon still standing in front of the mirror right where you saw him 15 minutes ago.

the boy still looks undecided, so you take matters into your own hands. “sunghoon, you look handsome even if you put a trash bag on your head,” you say as you cup his cheeks.

you two were still relatively new to dating. you were introduced to each other by mutual friends, saying that you two complement each other - both in looks and personality. sunghoon was the shy introvert who only had few people in his circle, and you were the bright and bubbly character who easily gets along with anyone.

you give yourself this valentine’s as an excuse to try and be more vocal about your appreciation for your boyfriend. you knew he still found it awkward to initiate skinship, but he tries his best. he may not be latching onto your side 24/7, you found it adorable how he would mindlessly look for your hand and play with your fingers. it became a habit of him eventually.

sunghoon’s cheeks turn red after you shower him with compliments once he’s finally made his mind on his fit. and you weren’t kidding - sunghoon literally pulls off any look. you snap a photo of your matching fits in front of the mirror before heading out. it’s also becoming a you and sunghoon thing to try and match each other’s style fashionably.

➵

you’ve been on a couple of dates with sunghoon, but this was the first time you’ll be spending valentine’s day together. this means that sunghoon was determined to impress you on this date.

on the way to your lunch, sunghoon stops by a flower shop. “i heard from your friends that you like tulips,” he says as he gives you a beautiful arrangement of tulips.

“they’re pretty,” you say as you continue walking. “nowhere near as pretty as you,” he says. you look up to him and see him awkwardly hide his smile with his hand. you’re the one being complimented, but why was your boyfriend the one blushing? you holding his hand didn’t help die down the red from his cheeks too.

he takes you to a fancy japanese place, knowing that you were craving some sushi these days. trying to pull off a brave facade, he claims he’s good with wasabi and places more than enough of the recommended amount on his sushi.

“i can handle this, it’s just wasabi,” he says as you continue to playfully joke about how he’s bad at eating spicy food. “okay tough guy! it’s just wasabi.”

he takes a good three seconds contemplating his decisions, but sunghoon has an innate pettiness and wants to prove that this green paste can’t be that bad. he’s tried wasabi before, it’s not bad.

he takes a bite and for a second, he genuinely thought it was okay. that was until it finally hit his nose, making his eyes seem watery. you laugh as he coughs, but immediately offers him water and some napkins to wipe his eyes.

once he’s finally able to inhale without the sting, he laughs along with you. and he thinks your laugh is one of the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard in his entire life.

➵

determined to redeem himself from the wasabi fiasco (you agree to never bring it up, especially not to his friends), he takes you to the ice skating rink.

you knew how great of a skater sunghoon is. as graceful as he already looks on land, you wonder how he looked even more ethereal on ice. being a bit clumsy, this meant you had to hold onto sunghoon most of the time you were skating.

you knew how to skate, and could stand for a good fifteen seconds without falling over. but sunghoon took this as an opportunity to be closer to you and hold you as you go over the rink. after a few laps over the ice, you felt a bit tired and offered to get some drinks for the both of you.

sunghoon skating was a sight to see. even though you’ve gotten your drinks already, you were in a trance as you watch your boyfriend beautifully skate over the ice, spinning and jumping from time to time. if majestic could be personified, it would be sunghoon.

there were other people on the rink, but you couldn’t take his eyes off of sunghoon. he was skating along to whatever pop music was playing on the speakers, and once he’s caught you staring at him, he calls you back with him on the rink.

so you skate along together, with him holding your hand as you tightly cling onto him as he speeds up to the music. he even swings your hand together along with the beat and happily sings along if he knew the lyric. there are only a few things that sunghoon loves in this world, and sunghoon is more than happy that he’s with his first and hopefully last love.

since it’s valentine’s, the music suddenly changes to a more romantic and slow song. sunghoon slows down your pace and faces you, wrapping his arms around your waist while you wrap yours around his shoulder. you couldn’t care less if people were slowly looking at you because in that moment, it was only you and sunghoon.

sunghoon, who was slowly leading the dance between the two of you, had such an affectionate look on his eyes. you can’t tell if it was cold, or was it his gaze that caused you to blush. you two continue slow dancing on ice along with the song. and as it comes to an end, he kisses your forehead gently while hugging you tighter.

“i am so in love with you,” he says as he looks at you before pulling you in for a kiss.

#enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen headcanons #enhypen #enhypennetwork #park sunghoon #sunghoon imagines #enhypen fluff #enhypen x reader

97 notes · View notes

wonwooze · 4 years

Text

Something told me it was you.

characters: jeon wonwoo/reader au genre: light smut, fluff warnings: cussing, alcohol consumption word count: 5841

Jeon Wonwoo is your best friend for life. You two met just before the two of you were supposed to depart for college. The two of you declared that the term platonic was the exact terminology to describe your friendship. You two were each other’s wingman, sworn protectors, and so many more. So it became a wonder, a great mystery when the two of you starts to realise that the line between love, and being in love is a fine one. Wonwoo best friends! to lover inspired by Zayn’s Tightrope.

i. We Should Thank Seungkwan

messages

15:46

Seungkwan boo: hey loser. What are you doing today? Probably nothing I shouldn’t ask. I’m going to eat out with a couple of my friends tonight. You should come and stop being such a caveman. See ya.

y/n: when? What should I wear? What friends?

Seungkwan boo: at 6, we’re going to a movie first at the mall. They’re my school friends. And they’re cool don’t worry. Be ready I’ll come get you.

y/n: ????? Ok

Seungkwan was a friend you, almost quite literally, found on craigslist. At the time you met Seungkwan, you were struggling with SAT and college application. Wanting to get into one of the top 5 universities didn’t help either. Equipped with wits, and endless resourcefulness, you found Seungkwan’s ad on craigslist. He was offering himself to be an SAT tutor, claiming that he almost graduated as valedictorian. After a quick search of his social media, Boo Seungkwan turned out to be enrolled in one of the top private schools in the country. You decided that he looked like a legit tutor that could help you ace your college application, and enlisted his help. As it turns out, Seungkwan was a better friend than he was a tutor. He was always hanging out with you at your house, or at his, telling the perfect jokes where he reiterates funny stories of his schoolmates—whom you never met—in great detail. You liked hanging out with Seungkwan, it would’ve been so much better if you have met him earlier, you thought.

That night was like no other. Seungkwan had never asked you to meet his schoolmates before. You’ve only seen their pictures on Seungkwan’s instagram posts, and have only heard of them from his anecdotes. All you know was that he had a large group of friends, and that they’re supposedly really fun. When Seungkwan showed up on your doorstep, he was eerily excited. He had a huge grin stamped on his face, and a Prius waiting behind him with the engines on. “I’m so excited for my friends to finally meet each other! You know y/n, I’ve been telling these fools that you would be a great addition to our friend group but they weren’t having it.” Seungkwan gestured to his friends inside the car. “Their loss, not mine.” You told him. “That’s the spirit!” He chimed.

When he finally shoved you into the backseat, and himself into riding shotgun, you finally had a look at the infamous Seungkwan’s friend group. There were a total of 5 people in that car, including yourself. You were stuck in the backseat, with two other guys you absolutely had never seen before. “Everyone, this is Y/N! She’ll be gracing us with her presence tonight.” That remark made you blush, and chummy in the gut, feeling the room temperature about to get awkward. You were always kind of anxious about meeting Seungkwan’s friends, fearing they decided they didn’t like you at the end of the day. “Hi.” You said awkwardly, waving your sweater paws lightly.

“You know, y/n. I always thought Seungkwan made you up just so he can ditch us lately. Nice to meet you though, I’m Soonyoung.” The boy sitting at the other side of the seat said by way of greeting. “Yeah, I always doubted you were real. I’m Vernon, nice to meet you.” The boy next to you said shyly. He was good looking, and had the faint smell of aftershave. “Yah! You guys are always on my neck it’s annoying.” Seungkwan chimed in from the front. And that’s how you met Wonwoo. Even if he didn’t made the introduction right then and there, you finally had a good look at him when the group finally arrived at the mall. He straightened his blazer before he reached out his hand to you, and with his baritone like deep voice announced that his name was Jeon Wonwoo.

“Wonwoo! Y/n is going to go to NYU this year! I was helping her with her application remember?” Seungkwan said in the middle of gulping down his cola. Your heart leapt when he mentioned NYU, still berated with the anxiety of college entrance procedures. “You are? Me too! What are the odds. Man I sure hope I get accepted though, it would suck if I didn’t.” “NYU is famous for its film school though, are you majoring in film?” This was the first chance you got of a private conversation with Wonwoo. “Nope. I’m majoring in English lit. Are you taking film?” “Yeah, I do actually.” You liked Wonwoo immediately. You remembered thinking his presence was so still, and calm, so calm that it softened your rough edges, and calmed your anxiety. “I hope I got accepted though. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t” You told him. Wonwoo shrugged lightly, and nonchalantly adds, “You’ll get in. Trust me.” You’ve never trusted zodiacs, or tarot reading, or anything of the sorts. But the way Wonwoo said it, his deep set cat like eyes piercing into you, that day you decided you were going to trust Jeon Wonwoo and whatever he said.

The next time you met him was when the two of you settled into orientation day at NYU. Wonwoo lived in a dorm at campus area, and you got your own place 5 minutes away from him. The two of you were so delighted when you met each other that day. Wonwoo remembered thinking it was like a match made in heaven. Being the quiet, shy, introvert that he is, Wonwoo relished the idea of having company when venturing into a brand new territory. He secretly wanted to held your hand the whole time but refrain from doing so. That day, Wonwoo took you to eat at a wings joint near campus, and the two of you laughed your asses off listening to Wonwoo’s anecdotes about Seungkwan. Lips smeared with barbecue sauce, Wonwoo ended his sermon about Seungkwan with a statement that you had etched into your memory until today. You and Wonwoo had fought about a number of things, which band was better, which movie was better, which tie he should buy. Sometimes he changed your mind, and sometime you changed his. But on this specific issue, you have never changed your opinion about because you had agreed completely. That night he said, “we should really thank Seungkwan though. If it wasn’t for him, we wouldn’t have met each other and I wouldn’t have a friend at campus. Who would’ve thought he would be a blessing?” The two of you have never stopped talking since then.

ii. The Tale of Two Roommates

“Won!” You banged at Wonwoo’s dorm room at exactly 7 pm. The two of you were supposed to hang out at the library, studying for finals. “Just a sec!” You heard Wonwoo called from inside the room, and couldn’t help but wonder what is taking him long enough. Contrary to what you expected, when the door finally swung open it wasn’t Jeon Wonwoo that was at the other side of the door. It was Wonwoo’s roommate, Kim Mingyu, if you had remembered correctly. “Oop! Sorry to startle you. Wonwoo is going to take some time, you better come in.” He said sweetly, a smile was breaking on his lips. Mingyu was kind of cute, and you wondered why Wonwoo never mentioned that fact. “Thanks! Um, Mingyu is it?” “Correct! I suppose Wonwoo have mentioned me?” Mingyu had eyes like sugar and caramel, sweet. “Only in passing.” You shrugged lightly. Mingyu proceeded to sit on his bed and fiddled his laptop.

“I hope you don’t mind me blasting a song through my laptop? I lost my headphones a couple of days ago.”

“Yeah no problem! This is your room anyway.”

“Just between you and me, I lent my headphones to Wonwoo and I could swear he had never given it back.” Mingyu said, not looking mad at all, instead his visage was decorated with a dubious grin. Implying that him and Wonwoo are close enough to make fun of each other. You continued to wonder why Wonwoo never properly introduced the two of you. The person in question was still in the bathroom, hell, only God knows what he’s doing in there.

You had thoughts that Wonwoo was going to be taking too long, and the library is going to be crowded by the time you two got there, but in all honesty he was unknowingly doing you a favour. As you sat on Wonwoo’s bed on the other side of the room, Mingyu was casually playing music by different artists. His tastes ranges from electric music, dance music, to popular songs you often hear on the radio. Your heart skipped a beat only when he glances at you from across the room, and replayed the song that was playing before. It was from Arctic Monkey’s 2013 album, a song you often play when you were in the mood to fall in love. The song, titled Knee Socks, was dripping through the speakers, and Mingyu caught your head bopping along with the beat. “You know this song?”

“Yeah, it was pretty popular when it came out didn’t it?” You added. This time you held Mingyu’s gaze. “It is actually! God, I feel so dumb playing this song now. It feels so outdated.” You chuckled at that. What does an attractive man like Mingyu had to fear? He began to talk to you about the songs he played after Arctic Monkey’s famous ballad was over. And you realised that Kim Mingyu, had held your attention completely. There was something about him that reminded you of chocolate covered caramel. When Wonwoo finally came out of the bathroom, he had looked unusually dashing. His face was completely bare, save for his round eyeglasses he never took off. He was wearing a v-neck t-shirt that shown his perfectly sculpted collarbone. And his wet hair was still slightly dripping. Not that you had noticed any of this, because that night you were completely smitten by Kim Mingyu.

Since then, you’ve found yourself making up a string of unusual reasons to come over to Wonwoo’s dorm. Either to borrow a charger, borrow Wonwoo’s laptop, anything, just so you have an excuse to see Kim Mingyu. It was between your 5th to 6th visits when Mingyu finally asked you out on a date. Wonwoo, being Wonwoo, always warned you against it. “Be careful! I hear he has a reputation.” It’s always be careful this, be careful that. You only started to wonder if Wonwoo was making some of those things up. As reality goes, Mingyu turned out to be one of the sweetest guy to exist. He was always walking you back to your place, even if that meant he had to take a 5 minute detour. He was always careful of your feelings. He never disregarded anything you said. The first few months, your relationship with Mingyu was perfect. You hung out with him in his room, which gave you the additional advantage of hanging out with Wonwoo too. You made Mingyu hot chocolate when he’s craving for one, and the list goes on.

But some stories are not only about you. When you first started dating Mingyu, Wonwoo was always skeptical about it. He was never quite sure about the odds of you two being together. But when it looked like it was going perfectly, Wonwoo’s frown began to cease. His doubts replaced with another feeling. Wonwoo couldn’t quite give the feeling a name, he just knew it when he felt it.

The first time was when he walked into the two of you cuddling on Mingyu’s bed. It was not like Wonwoo was seeing red, but it almost seemed like he did. He felt the tiniest pinch inside his gut, but no words were registered to explain the phenomenon. After that, he only dreaded the thought of seeing the two of you together. It was not as if he didn’t like seeing you happy, he did. He completely, wholeheartedly did. He just preferred he didn’t have to see it.

iii. You Shouldn’t Build Houses Out Of People

It was nearing the end of your second year in college when you woke up in Wonwoo’s arms. You and Wonwoo stayed being the best friends that you always were. The year that has passed only made the bond stronger. There has been an additional list of activities that you and Wonwoo had shared without making it awkward because you two are almost closer than any friend. Going out late at night for McDonalds, hanging out at his dorm, catching a midnight movie premiere together. It was always Wonwoo this, Wonwoo that, if not Mingyu this, Mingyu that. Wonwoo had hugged you, braided your hair, picked you up and swung you around when your short movie won a college award. You had hugged Wonwoo, caressed the top of his head, squeezed his hand when you get nervous. Anything and everything. You had stayed together with Mingyu too, the whole time. You caught yourself repeatedly saying a prayer for Wonwoo and Mingyu’s presence in your life.

This is where the chapters started to get ugly. Love stories, they tend to get ugly before the main protagonist had any idea what they had been seeing. The same pattern you had found happening with your relationship with Mingyu. It was not as if you didn’t love Mingyu, you do. And he loved you too. But as time strengthen some relationships, yours only wore it down. Mingyu was constantly distracted by his college, his devotion to his music projects, his friend group that doesn’t include you and Wonwoo. This is when you start to realise that love was not a given. It was supposed to be a companion you were supposed to caress, feed and entertain. It was a guest, that came knocking into two people’s heart. And when the people in question started to be too busy to take care of it like they used to, love began to walk out the door. And so then, when Mingyu began to choose hanging out with his band, instead of you, or when you made little effort in making Tuesdays with Mingyu happen again, that was when love began to fade into the background.

The breakup was harsh. It was not as if you had been too numb to not feel broken up about ending a year long relationship with Mingyu. You had silently wept for falling out of love, you often question what you could’ve done to make it turn out the other way. You and Mingyu was sitting at the bench in the dorm lawn. It was almost midnight, so no one could’ve overheard the silent sobs. “It’s hurting me. That we are together, but I don’t feel for you anymore. I feel for the memories. I clung to it as if it’s the only thing I have. It pains me.” Mingyu’s words would not leave your head for years to come. And you had silently nodded in pain, because it was hurting you too. To look at Mingyu, and to wish loudly that things were as they were before. It hurt you to look at Mingyu and could only think of the past when the memories of present was what supposed to hook you onto reality.

He had went inside after that. That night, Mingyu didn’t walk you home and take his usual 5 minutes detour. But Wonwoo did. Like all best friends do, upon seeing Mingyu coming into the room looking completely distressed, something in Wonwoo snapped. He grabbed his coat, ran down the stairs and caught you silently crying on the bench. Wonwoo walked you home. Staying completely silent all the way there. Tucked you in to bed, and brew you coffee. He stayed with you the whole night, skipped class the next day, and moved out of his dorm the next day. “I just think it would be awkward seeing Mingyu after this.” He had said when you asked him why. You promised you would help him find a place.

Before you two had found one though, Wonwoo stayed at your place for a couple of days. And then days turn to weeks. You had an extra spare bed you only used if your parents come to visit, and Wonwoo was welcomed to occupy it anytime he want. It was quite a comical set up, Wonwoo sleeping on the extra bed in front of the tv, and you on safely tucked in your bedroom. Wonwoo’s stuff splattered everywhere in his space, yours neatly stacked in your bedroom. You having to walk over Wonwoo sleeping body when you had to go to the bathroom at 3 in the morning. It was quite comical, but it was extra magical. Wonwoo was the best roommate anyone could ever ask for, he made dinner sometimes, do the dishes regularly, he’d watched shitty tv with you all the time, and he’s basically a kickass friend. You didn’t want to admit it but having Wonwoo living with you clearly made your days a whole lot better. You slept better knowing the safety of Wonwoo’s presence. You studied better, because Wonwoo always offered to study with you—knowing that someone willingly endured a form of torture with you, had given you an extra serotonin boost. You almost wished he would never found his own place.

The one night that you highlighted vividly in your memory about this chapter you shared with Wonwoo, was the night of your final exams. Exams had always tortured you. You always had this innate need to do everything perfectly, but also freaking out over the limited time that you have in studying. It was not a strange phenomenon that sometime you broke down crying before an exam, it was an accepted reality. Especially, when the days are extremely bad. You would cry harder, or break easier. There was nothing in between.

When Wonwoo noticed this, he calmed you down immensely. You were instantly reminded of how Wonwoo’s presence provided you this strange sense of calmness that softened all your edges. Wonwoo told you not to get too hung up over it, you’ll ace it anyway, you’ll be fine, in his deep baritone voice you secretly admired. The cherry on top of the sundae was when Wonwoo brought you to your room, tucked you in lightly so you would sleep. “It’s okay to sleep now. We’ve been studying since 5, we can continue again tomorrow morning. Besides your exams didn’t start until the day after tomorrow right?” The way he said it so calmly just forced rationality inside your head, you did nothing but nod. You caressed Wonwoo’s hand lightly as he sat by your bed to fiddle with his phone. Anyone who didn’t comprehend the bond you had with Wonwoo would think that what you were doing implied that you were his girlfriend. But anyone who shared the same bond probably knew better. But you weren’t so sure you knew better either.

“Won. Please don’t leave.”

“What? I’m not leaving. I’m right here.” He said, not peeling his eyes off the screen. “I mean just sleep here tonight. I have plenty of room.” At that Wonwoo directed his gaze at you. Undoubtedly surprise at your statement. This, was the one activity you had never done together. “Are you sure?” He asked. Wonwoo, the compassionate, quiet guy, who had helped you strengthen your grip on reality, time and time again. Sometimes you ask yourself if you even deserve him. “I’m serious. Just sleep!” You tugged at his hand and tapped at the empty space beside you. “Okay..” He agreed, and proceeded to take off his glasses, put down his phone and lay down beside you. Granted, with Wonwoo on the bed, the space seemed to shrink.

“Are you comfortable?” He asked innocently. “Ugh, don’t make this awkward Won. Just flop on the bed, lay in it, whatever. My bed is your bed, too.” You said as you stare at him. Head propped on the pillow. It was not long after that you started snoring. And so did Wonwoo. Secretly he liked sharing your bed. Your warmth provided him a strange sense of comfort he never experienced before. Wonwoo, only wondered, not out loud though, at the strange beat of his heart that night.

The nights after that wasn’t as bad as the first one. Sometimes you flop over his bed in front of the tv and slept with him. Sometimes he slept on your bed. It was a shared routine that you two never talked about. Not a single word said about the nature of this new activity.

A couple of nights after, you were casually scrolling through your instagram feed only to be greeted with a picture of Mingyu, and a girl you recognised was his classmate. You didn’t know what it meant. Had it meant Mingyu was completely over you? Did he do it just to piss you off? You realised you were living in bliss when you were with Wonwoo. Completely unaware of the world going on out there. Almost like a honeymoon, you thought, but then quickly dismissed the thought as if it were foul. But that picture of Mingyu had completely shattered the serenity that sheltered you and Wonwoo. You threw your phone across the room. Seemingly seething with anger.

“The hell? What is wrong with you?” He began to walk and pick up the phone. Mingyu’s smile was still plastered on the phone. The same exact page. “Oh.” He said when he realised what it was all about. “Yeah. Oh.” Your voice was dripping with venom. Only then did you realise how your anger at the breakup has never really subsided. It was as if anger comes in waves, and this was about to crash, loudly. Wonwoo calmly put the phone down to pull you into a tight hug. His hug felt calming. If your anger was like waves, Wonwoo’s hug was like a lighthouse.

You were sitting next to him on his bed, your head atop his shoulder, and his chin atop yours. “I’m sorry.” He said, softly. You made a mental note that you could recognise his voice, anywhere, anytime. You only shrugged in response. Did your relationship not mean anything to Mingyu? It hurts the most when it almost meant the world to you. You were cherishing the way Wonwoo’s arms curled on your shoulders was like a sign of protection. It in and of itself, meant you’re safe. You could only wonder how someone could be of such importance to another person.

“You know, you shouldn’t build houses out of people, y/n. Because they come and go. So easily. Almost like it’s nothing.” He finally pulled himself away from his initial position to stare at you right in the eyes. His eyes, you’ve always thought was like a cat’s. But now you realised the gaze, the fire flaming behind it, it looked more like a fox’s. Everything about Wonwoo in that moment, reminded you of safety, protection, familiarity and home. He was the only thing in New York that tied you to home. You both came from the same small town, you knew the same people, you’ve been his friend since college barely even started. Wonwoo was, in every sense of the word, home. And that night you’ve decided to come back.

You’d like to think you were never on your right mind when you’re sad. You were always making rash decisions you would later either regret, or forget. You never really know what was into you, to get you to pull him by the t-shirt, close the distance between you two that initially felt like 5 miles, but was now nothing but a shared breath. You kissed him, so hard that it felt like you were drowning. Later in life, when someone offered you to pick between chocolate covered caramel and peppermint candies, you made sure to pick the latter. Because that night, Wonwoo smelled like peppermint candies, and you couldn’t get it out of your mind. Almost as if it was driving you crazy.

You’d like to think you were pushed by all the pent up anger, the unsaid feelings about how you secretly liked Wonwoo’s touch, Wonwoo’s presence beside you on the bed, just Wonwoo. It could’ve been the way Wonwoo was literally sitting underneath the moonlight, basking in all of its glory. It could’ve been the way his fox like eyes stared at you like no one ever does before, like he understood you, through and through. It could’ve been anything. All you knew was if you didn’t kiss Wonwoo, you would’ve gone insane. “Kiss me, Won.” You murmured against his lips. And to your surprise, he did. He kissed you like he had never kissed anyone before.

He, on the other hand, liked to think, he was carried off. He didn’t know what has gotten into his right mind kissing you like that. Like he was hungry. Like he was in pain. He had pushed all other thoughts from his mind. That night there was only you. He looked into your eyes, and was reminded of the person you have always been to him. The only person who would listen to his nerdy ramblings about movies. The only person who remembered the names of all his cousins who always caused him trouble. The only person worth a damn in this whole world. It was not long before his hands found the buttons of your shirt, and your hands slid into his back, passionately lifting his t-shirt. When he pulled himself off of you to breathe, you recited him, “I shouldn’t build houses out of people, because they leave. But you, you’re my best friend Won. You would never leave.” You pulled him into a kiss one more time, and that night was the night the two of you came home.

iv. What We Talk About When We Talk About Love

“Jeon Wonwoo!”

Wonwoo, startled, immediately turned around to see who that was. The owner of the voice was Kwon Soonyoung, his childhood best friend. Wonwoo had his hand on your back, slowly ushering you to Soonyoung’s direction. Kwon Soonyoung was a handsome 20-something year old. He was tall, not taller than Wonwoo, you made a mental note to yourself. His figure was very lean, like the figure of a professional figure skaters, or that of a professional dancer. Wonwoo with a grin stamped all over his face went up to him and gave him the tightest hug.

It was a festive evening. To be precise, it was Wonwoo’s friend, Seungcheol’s wedding. “Crazy how he is only a year older than me, but he’s getting married. Meanwhile, I couldn’t even score a date?”

Strange as it may seems, that one eventful night was the only time you slept with Wonwoo. You two woke up the other day, brushed each other’s hair, straightened your t-shirts and went on with life like nothing had happened. You had always thought it was one of two things; either it meant nothing, or it had meant everything and the weight of the thought had rendered your tongue useless. Either way, the two of you had never mentioned dating, or sex, or relationship in front of the other. As if it was a silent pact. The fact that this pact was never officially made just confirmed that Wonwoo and you practically operated on the same braincells.

“It’s because you have never made a move! Jeon Wonwoo, how are girls supposed to get to know you if you never made a move?” Unlike a normal person, Jeon Wonwoo never thought other girls exist besides you. It was always you, he thought of. You’re the only person he would call if he got into a fight with his mom. You’re the only person that should know his in depth feelings about his classmates. You’re the only person he thought of for a date to a friend’s wedding. After all, you’re his best friend.

“It feels like we haven’t seen each other in years!” Soonyoung exclaimed. The way he inserts himself into conversations strangely feels familiar. Soonyoung has a presence that made you immediately felt embraced, and at ease. He kind of reminded you of Wonwoo that way. “It’s because we truly haven’t, moron! How are you doing? I see you’re still getting 0 luck with girls.” Wonwoo teased him. The way the two interacted, made you think of brothers who have been separated for too long. Soonyoug playfully slapped Wonwoo’s back and gulped down his champagne. “Aish, don’t go flexing on me now that you got yourself a beautiful girlfriend!” He said, gesturing to you who were just standing there.

“Me? I’m not his girlfriend! I would never! No offense to you though, Won.” A smile emerged on Wonwoo’s face. It is a running joke that you would never date Wonwoo, and vice versa. You once told him, “At this point, we’re practically twins!”

“None taken, my lady.” Wonwoo said, still with the smile on his face. “Oh! Thank god. I was about to give you a whole essay on why you should rethink your decision.” Soonyoung teased, winking at you. At that the three of you laughed. You’ve never met Wonwoo’s childhood friends before. But he had always assured you, they’re like family to him, so they should be family to you too.

You, Soonyoung, and Wonwoo took up a table of five, joined by Seungkwan, and Seokmin who just happened to know Seungcheol too. You gave Boo Seungkwan a kiss on the cheek, reminding him how much you missed him. Seungkwan and Seokmin was such a comedic duo, you couldn’t help but burst with laughter every five minutes or so. It was one of those days where you really enjoyed yourself.

Weddings were not particularly your type of events. Strangely though, weddings were always graced with a type of magic that you could sense through the air. It might be because of how weddings itself was supposed to be the strongest union of two individuals who loved each other endlessly, and sacred enough that it could only be broken through death. It could be because a wedding is the happiest moments of a person’s life. It could be because for everyone else who was invited, it was a chance to reunite with old friends, and families.

And that night, the magic poured on your cheeks like raindrops. That night, as you sat by Wonwoo’s side. Feeling strangely nervous for finally meeting Wonwoo’s friends, he held your hands so tight, as if it was a secret message. And the message reads; don’t worry, you’re safe. What’s crazy is how he never let go of your hand the entire night. It was an unspoken gesture, but it was there. Even when you have finally loosen up, and laughed along with Seungkwan and Seokmin, he still wouldn’t let go.

When Seungcheol came up to the stage, serenaded with lovely romantic tunes, and began to start his speech, an homage to his wife. The night began to descend into something you are not entirely sure of.

“If I was supposed to describe my wife in three words, I’m going to be at a loss of words. Because how do you even try to describe someone so attentive, so caring, so beautiful, entirely intelligent, possesses the kindest heart, with just three words?

My wife has given me everything I thought I didn’t deserve.”

During that pause, Wonwoo clutched your hand a little bit tighter.

“I was not the least bit stable when I first met her. That is even an understatement. I was just a mess. I was all over the place. I was late on bills, I was fired from my previous two jobs, and worse, I preferred to be drunk than having to face any of that senseless reality.”

This time you clutched his hand tighter. At one point, you could feel your own breath flowing in and out of your lungs.

“But, my wife? She was like a god sent. She came into my life like the angel Gabriel. Gave me a sense of direction. Helped me get sober. Helped me find a place to live that was not my mother’s basement.” Seungcheol earned quite a number of chuckles at that. But if you look clearly, his wife’s, as well as his friend’s eyes were starting to brim with tears. It must’ve been a dark chapter in his life.

“This woman practically saved my life.”

You turned your head, to get a look at Wonwoo. He was still staring directly at the stage, there were bits of tear on his clear, perfect eyes. As you look at him, you were only reminded of one thing. That night at your place, where Wonwoo was basking in the moonlight. Tonight, it was as if he was the moonlight. His grip on your hands felt like a comfort, security. The way he had always made you feel.

“So, when they asked me to write an homage to the angel who I’m now proud to call my wife, I thought, ‘man, how am I supposed to do that?’”

Wonwoo must’ve felt your stares, because now he was looking at you. There was such tenderness in his eyes, that couldn’t be compared. You’ve never seen Wonwoo this way before. Like a godsent. There was only one time that almost, briefly mimics this moment. It was the day you two went to the beach, for the first time together. Wonwoo was staring straight into the sunset, the wind whipping his hair, the glow of the sunset framing his visage. The scene was so dreamy, you almost thought it didn’t happen.

“Man, I suck at this. I hope my wife isn’t disappointed.”

Again, Seungcheol earned a number of laughter at that. And from the looks of it, his wife isn’t in any how disappointed. There were visible tears running down her cheeks, threatening to undo her makeup.

“So, let’s all raise our glass.”

Wonwoo’s stares was like daggers in your heart. Threatening to undo a secret long unraveled.

“To the most beautiful woman, I have ever met.”

As Wonwoo was fixing his stare at you, everything seems to finally made sense. There has always been a reason why you fit him more than his favourite sweater. To the most beautiful woman, I have ever met, a sentence fit only for you.

“To the love of my life.”

Claps erupted from all around the venue. And when you knew, you knew.

#write-svt #svtwriters #svtwritersnet #wonwoo scenarios #jeon wonwoo au #seventeen wonwoo #wonwoo blurb #wonwoo fluff #seventeen au #seventeen scenarios #wonwoo au #seventeen imagines #seventeen fic #svt wonwoo

136 notes · View notes

lesbianlotties · 3 years

Link

five times Deena and Sam met in secret (and one time they didn’t) - Chapter 5

Chapters: 5/6 Fandom: Fear Street Trilogy (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Samantha "Sam" Fraser/Deena Johnson Characters: Deena Johnson, Samantha "Sam" Fraser (Fear Street) Additional Tags: Pre-Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Canon, High School, Cheerleaders, Band, Teenagers, Teen Romance, First Meetings, First Love, First Kiss, Fluff and Humor, Fluff, Happy Ending, Light Angst

Secrets.

Deena and Sam met by accident. They fell in love in secret.

But how long can they last together like that?

Chapter 5 - secret heartbreak:

The following weeks were a real rollercoaster for Deena and Sam. When they were up, dizzy with love, on top of the world, they were blind to the dangers ahead of them. When they were down, a thin line away from rock-bottom, in moods so dark they could barely find each other, no matter how hard they craned their necks they couldn’t catch sight of what it was like when they were up in the clouds. Objectively, they were kids living under genuinely difficult circumstances already, and the fact that they loved each other tragically turned out to bring on more obstacles. However, if anybody dared to even hint at the fact they were possibly acting as traditionally dramatic teenagers in love… that person was aggressively ignored. If in a couple of months the two girls would find themselves involved in much more dangerous, seemingly inexplicable, deadly situations, well, they had no way of knowing that. At the time, every moment they spent together, the good and the bad, felt like a life or death situation.

Of course, there were still good moments. Those memories would last them a lifetime. Those moments would inspire them to fight back against evil forces beyond their imagination. Those memories would warm them in the cold and lonely nights they’d have to spend separately. There were big, unforgettable nights. The two of them going to a party with Kate and Simon, just so the four of them could end up ditching the party and driving Deena’s car around Shadyside in the middle of the night, music blasting from the speakers, the four of them signing at the top of their lungs, at one point breaking one of the car’s windows. Then there were a hundred simple experiences, nearly identical, but all unique and magical on their own. Three girls stopping by the Grab n´ Bag when Simon was working to cheer him up, hanging around the store as if it was a second home, making a mess and helping him clean up, laughing the entire time. Movie nights in the Johnson’s house, Kate spilling her drink during a scary movie picked by Sam, Josh adorably flustered while trying to help her, Simon waking up the next day with marker scrawls on his face, Deena and Sam sneaking away from them for some time for themselves with little to no shame in their smiling faces. Skipping classes together, bus drives to football games, hanging out at the mall, a perfect hundred years.

Looking back, in their separate houses, Deena and Sam would one day feel it was almost infuriating how perfectly Sam used to fit in with them, all of them.

Because she quickly became Kate’s right-hand woman on the cheerleading team. Kate’s commanding frown was always accompanied by a soft “she’s right” from Sam, a combination that could convince anybody of anything to the point the team looked like a small mafia of blue skirts and perfect ponytails. Kate’s razor-sharp wit was surprisingly matched by soft-spoken Sam with quiet, clever, and perfectly timed comments. The two girls used to go shopping together while waiting for Deena and Simon to get out of detention, they would be the ones in charge of cooking on the rare occasion the group chose to prepare something at home instead of ordering pizza. Deena found out only months later that Sam had approached cheer captain Kate and blushed vehemently asking her about Deena. Sam had always been too scared to call Kate her best friend, knowing Deena would always be Kate’s favorite, but that didn’t make it any less true. Kate joked so many times about how Sam “could do so much better than Deena'', not knowing Sam believed it was the entire opposite. Neither of them even suspected that in a matter of weeks Kate would be comforting a heartbroken Deena and furiously taking her side.

Then there was Simon. Walking away from him hurt Sam almost as much as leaving Deena. Simon had been the first one to call her Sam, the best at cheering her up, the one to encourage her to express every part of her that could be considered out of the norm. Sam used to be the one to paint Simon’s nails, he would be painfully slow attending Sam’s mom at the store just to annoy her and amuse Sam. He would be the one to go with her to the movies to rewatch for the third time her latest favorite horror movie, and she was the only of the girls who didn’t fight back his brotherly affection of bear hugs and occasionally picking her up. Deena had no idea that Simon had gotten the number of Sam’s house in Sunnyvale. He called her twice a week, every two weeks, once a month, and then never again. Sam deeply regretted not calling him her best more often, and she still kept the black nail polish that she didn’t even use.

Every loss that Sam was going to experience upon leaving Shadyside hurt a different way. Josh wasn’t the exception. Because Sam was an only child. She felt like she hadn't known the meaning of family until she found herself eating pizza in the Johnson’s basement with Deena, Josh, Kate, and Simon. Josh didn’t feel like a little brother to her, not exactly, but he inevitably became something very similar. Just as she knew that she couldn’t be a sister to him, not exactly, but she would be lying if she said she didn’t know she’d been a good friend to him. They could relate to each other. They were both introverted, guarded, still keeping their interest safely to themselves and the best parts of who they were hidden behind brick walls. But Sam felt more like herself whenever she was in that house, where she had received nothing but kindness and open arms. The least she could do was return the favor. The least she could do was smile and cheerfully greet him every time they crossed paths, regardless of his apparent fear of cheerleaders. She could ask about his day, about the latest videogame she didn’t really understand, about his current favorite record, listen to his rants on conspiracy theories even if Deena was rolling her eyes and trying to pull her away toward her room. Sam liked to think that if she’d known her absence would actually take a toll on him, that he’d retreat further into himself, no longer talk about his real interests to anybody in person anymore, end up resenting her and Deena as one, maybe she would’ve done things differently.

Something.

Anything.

She would’ve done everything differently if she’d known Kate would hate her, Simon would forget her, Josh would blame her, and Deena…

Deena.

Goddammit, weren’t there good moments with Deena? More than enough to make up for the bad ones? Why should Sam have to give up all that? Skipping class to run away with Deena, eating cheeseburgers in the hood of her car, helping her clean up her house to ease that weight from her shoulders, fall asleep in her arms, wake up with Deena’s head on her chest, stealing her girlfriend’s jacket, laughing with her, kissing her, dancing with her, talking for hours, counting her freckles, just the pleasure of seeing her smile… Who really cared about the bad stuff? Maybe Deena was wrong in pressuring her to come out, and maybe it was true that Sam refused to even talk about the future. So what if Deena’s negativity could be too much at times, so what if Sam’s idea of “better” was other people's thoughts and not her own. But what if it really could hurt when Deena’s temperament got the worst of her, and Sam went out of her way to outmatch her? Maybe they actually cared and suffered because of Deena misdirecting her anger at the world toward her vulnerable girlfriend, and Sam resenting Deena for issues that only Sam could solve but wouldn’t.

In the end, it hardly mattered if they knew that they were worth the fight. They didn’t find in time the motivation to fight against their problems, not even the ones they could have solved. Because if they would’ve just taken a step back they could have seen. The people around them, the ones that truly loved them, had been right when they suggested these were common struggles with teenagers handling feelings bigger than themselves. They could have seen most of their issues weren’t so severe, they were things they could have easily worked on. They had been so close to make it, they were meant to get better and get over those obstacles. And someday, they would. But first, they had to face the chapter in their lives when Deena got tired of being a secret and Sam had one last secret that would change everything.

On the last day, Deena drove as fast as she could to their high school. Her car’s tires screeched on the pavement as she parked hastily, and she was out of the car in the blink of an eye. She practically ran all the way to their spot under the bleachers to find Sam. She was waiting for her right on the spot where they met, arms wrapped around herself and eyes swollen red.

“Sam,” Deena whispered her name as soon as she was close enough and after a couple more steps, she threw her arms around her girlfriend. Sam was nearly thrown off balance, she was so dejected she barely reacted. “Tell me it isn’t true,” Deena begged through gritted teeth. “Sam,” she called her name more desperately now. “Talk to me, please. It’s me.”

That seemed to be enough to break the spell of sorrow that had fallen over Sam. All at once, the blonde wrapped her arms around Deena, grabbing fistfuls of the familiar green jacket and holding on tightly, she started sobbing, she pressed her face against Deena’s shoulder, and her entire body trembled as she cried.

“Don’t go,” Deena choked, holding the girl she loved as tight as she could. “You don’t have to go, Sam,” Deena breathed out. She was trying harder than ever to keep her cool. She bit her bottom lip hard, to avoid crying. “Please, don’t leave me,” Deena said, finally breaking down and starting to cry, “I love you.”

Deena’s heart and mind were racing, trying to make sense of what was happening. The divorce was done. Sam’s mother was moving to Sunnyvale, and taking her daughter with her. Sam was moving away. Not to a neighboring town, to an enemy town. Not a few minutes away, but a poisoned ocean away. She was leaving Deena, she was leaving her behind, and that was the loudest thought resonating in the brunette’s mind.

For a while, all they could do was hold each other. Eventually, Sam’s sobs subsided, their tears stopped coming, and their breathing evened out, so their hearts were once again beating in unison. Sam eased her hold on Deena and pulled away just enough to rest their foreheads together. She looked at the pair of eyes that had become her one true home, and she said, “I love you too, you know?”

Deena gave her a watery smile and moved her hand to delicately wipe away the tears that fell on Sam’s cheeks. “Why are you making it sound like a goodbye?” she wondered. As her only response, Sam closed her eyes, but continued to hold her. “When do you leave, Sam?” was Deena’s next question, but again, she only received silence in response. She saw no option but to pull back so she could properly look at Sam, and she repeated her question. “When do you leave, Sam?”

The blonde nearly started trembling again, but she didn’t cry. She took a deep breath, opened her watery blue eyes, and looked at Deena as she replied, “Next week.”

“Are you serious?” Deena flinched. That was a genuine question, and when the other girl nodded, she frowned. “And you’re only telling me now?”

“I’m sorry,” Sam whispered, looking down again.

“Sam, that’s fucked up,” Deena seethed. Her arms fell from her girlfriend’s frame as she took a step back. Sam reached out just in time so at least their hands would stay linked.

“I didn’t,” Sam sniffled, “want to do this.”

“Do what?” Deena tilted her head. “Break up with me?”

“Don’t do this,” Sam closed her eyes again, tightly.

“Oh, excuse me for being shocked at the fact that my fucking girlfriend tells me she’s moving away one day before leaving!”

“It’s not one day, it’s one week!” Sam protested. “This is exactly what I was avoiding.”

Deena let go of Sam’s hands then. She took a step back, but she bit her tongue to keep her next accusation from spilling out. “I’m sorry,” she finally grumbled.

Sam looked at her with a small spark of hope in her eyes. “Me too. Really.”

There was a pause in their conversation. Sam couldn’t have looked more uncomfortable if she’d tried. Deena was clenching her jaw and looking at the ground. She shoved her hands in the pockets of her pants and when she trusted her voice to be sufficiently steady, she said. “Sunnyvale, Sam? Really?”

The blonde let out a sad chuckle. “My mom’s choice. But… you know…”

Her words made Deena frown. “Know what?” She inquired. “Know what, Sam?”

In response, Sam scoffed. “Nothing,” she shook her head, “Nothing. I just, uh, have to go.” She shrugged, and looked away.

“Holy shit,” Deena breathed out, as something important clicked in her mind. “You actually want to go…”

“I don’t. My mom’s making me go.”

“Bullshit,” Deena snapped. “One, you hate your mom. Two, you’re lying to me right now, Sam.”

“She’s my mom, Deena.”

“You also have a dad,” Deena pointed out.

The comment made Sam roll her eyes. “You know my dad’s not doing much better than yours.”

“Don’t fucking get my dad involved in this.”

“Fine,” it was Sam’s turn to snap. “I’m just saying, it might not be such a bad thing.”

“Not a bad thing?!” Deena laughed darkly. “Babe, you’re moving to Sunnyvale. That goes against everything you are.”

“You don’t know that,” Sam’s frown deepened.

Once again, Deena exhaled a bitter laugh. “Oh, this again?”

“What?”

Sam had taken a step closer, and Deena imitated her, not even realizing when they had moved so far away from each other in the first place. “You think you can move to Sunnyvale and it’ll fix all your problems, huh?” Deena willed herself to smile through the pain she was feeling.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, but I’m right,” Deena continued to smirk, even if her heart broke repeatedly watching Sam’s eyes fill with tears again. “You think that if you follow your mom blindly to Sunnyvale she will suddenly like you? Is that it? You think that you can change your house, the color of your cheer uniform, and it’ll change what’s inside you? Take away all your problems?”

“Deena, stop,” Sam attempted to put an end to the attack, her voice shaking.

“Tell me, Sam,” Deena continued, ruthless, “does she know you came here to break up with me? Or is that a secret too?”

“I’m not breaking up with you.”

“Might as well do it.”

“Deena.”

At that point, both girls shut up. They were hit by the realization of what Deena had just said, what she had hinted at, not very delicately. Deena was horrified by her own words, but Sam was only getting angrier.

She took a deep, steadying breath and said, “Deena, if you really loved me you’d want what’s best for me.”

“How is this good for you?!” Deena hissed. “It’s a lie!”

“It’s an improvement.”

Another bitter chuckle from Deena came. “Nice.” As conflicted as she felt, she couldn’t take her eyes off Sam. The blonde girl was visibly furious, standing painfully straight, her hands tightened into fists, taking deep breaths to hold on to her anger. But she looked beautiful. And Deena knew her, and knew she wouldn’t be able to hold on for longer, and knew, too, that part of her needed Sam to break too.

“In Sunnyvale, there’s hope, Deena,” Sam explained slowly through gritted teeth, “I could have a better future there.”

“A future without me,” Deena added. All at once, without even her expecting it, her voice took a sad and resigned tone, instead of the blazing anger from before.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“It’s what you’ll have.”

“It doesn’t have to be!” Sam’s voice was trembling worse than before, “Deena… I still love you.”

Deena roughly wiped tears off her cheeks and clenched her jaw. “Well, that’s inconvenient for you,” she said, “You’re a Sunnyvaler now, aren’t you?”

“Deena!” Sam yelled. She covered her face with her hands.

“How could you not tell me, Sam?!” Deena yelled too. And she got exactly what she had been waiting for.

“I was avoiding this!” Sam replied, face flushed with rage. “I knew you would freak out, I knew you wouldn't understand, I knew you would blame me!”

“What?” Deena breathed out.

“Deena! Look around you!” Sam continued to yell, moving her arms around her now. “Your life is a mess, and you want to keep it that way! You are way too damn comfortable at your rock bottom you refuse to see any other option. Even worse, you want to drag me down with you! You drag everyone down with you, Deena. Your chaos, your anger, your hate. It doesn’t help you, it doesn’t help anybody, and it’ll get you nowhere! And I’m tired of that!”

There was a tear falling over Deena’s cheek, and her lips were parted in surprise, but an incredulous smile was tugging at her lips. She was trembling as much as Sam, they were both breathing heavily, and they hadn’t felt pain like that ever before.

“Is that really what you think of me?” Deena whispered.

“No…” Sam weakly shook her head, but she couldn’t meet Deena’s eyes as she replied.

That earned the worst laugh from Deena so far. Sam took a couple of steps forward. But when she reached out for Deena, the brunette flinched away. That was one of the worst parts for Sam, because it made her feel like there was really no turning back from this now.

“It’s not the end of the world, you know?” Sam sniffled, looking as sad as she ever did, but trying her hardest to hold on to her anger. “I’m only thirty minutes away.”

Deena thought about it for a moment, she was looking down, lightly kicking the ground with the tip of her boot.

“Hey, if I’m not worth staying for, then you’re not chasing. Are you, Sam?”

Sam pretty much gasped when she heard those words. In the blink of an eye, Deena pictured what would happen if Sam burst into tears again and she wouldn’t be able to not reach out and comfort her, so they would cry together, and kiss, and make up, and solve it all. But, of course, that wasn’t what happened. Because Deena had hurt Sam just as badly.

In the end, Sam only frowned, gritted her teeth, and yelled, “Fine!”

Which, Deena thought, was sort of okay. Because as she started walking away, if she was being honest with herself, this was the only way this could have ended up like. “Have fun living your fake ass life, Sam,” she said, before turning away completely and slowly walking toward her badly parked car.

“Deena!” Sam called out her name one last time.

Sam was frozen and crying in the spot where Deena left her, while Deena drove away heartbroken in the cursed town where Sam left her.

#oh god why is angst a thing and why did i do it #fear street #deena x sam #sameena #fear street fanfic #sam x deena #fear street fanfiction #deena johnson #sam fraser #my fic

21 notes · View notes