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#Yeah I'm...feeling something (or.. if you've read this.. not feeling something and then feeling something because of that non-feeling)
polyestercleaner · 3 days
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Slow Touch⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚
|Summary:You go out on a "date" with Joost thinking it would be an average date, little did you know it would be more than just average.
|Content Warning⚠️: Smut, Fingering, joost being a gentle dom
You open your eyes to the sun grazing you, you groan in exhaustion as you slowly adjust to the lighting in your room, you slowly turn your head to the side, the clock reads out, 10AM, how early, this isn't when you usually get up, but you accept your fate for today, you get up and walk towards the bathroom, the reflection is merely you, your hair is a completely Bush of sticks, your eyes are puffy and tired, "what the fuck." You sigh to yourself before heading back to your room, you sit down on your bed as you plan to go back to sleeping, but that thought flies away once you hear the noise of your phone buzzing, your eyes open wide as you grab your phone quickly, it's a text from... Joost! He's a close friend, you've known him for over a year now, and as much as you lied to yourself, you knew you liked him and you knew there was something going on between you two. You quickly tap on his text.
Heya! Just wanted to ask if you wanna come with to the Cafe! You and me, my treat. You decide!(。•̀ᴗ-)✧ ps:if it's a yes meet me at 11:30
You shudder in excitement, you wanted this for so long now. He was BASICALLY asking for a date! You held your phone so tightly and your hands you were sure you're gonna break it, you smiled to yourself as you thought of what to say.
You and me? Sure! I'll be there, just don't be late,also could you get a pack of cigarettes? I ran out of 'em, thanks!(ゝз╹)
You put your phone down as you ran to your closet, pulling out a white dress and black heels, you quickly got dressed and brushed your hair enough to make it look tidy and neat, you pulled your purse and closed the door, you checked the time and it was already 11:20, "fuck I'm gonna be late!" You grumbled as you ran towards the Cafe, it was a 10 minute walk and yet with these heels your attempts at running were completely useless, you reached the Cafe gasping for air, you caught a glimpse of joost sitting at the Cafe, earphones intact and phone in hand, you walked towards him as you hugged him, "hey!" He let out, each hug you've ever given him or he's ever given you made your heart thump fast, always. You sat down infront of him as he gazed at your body, "well aren't you all dolled up and pretty huh?" You giggled to yourself as you put down your purse next to you, the waiter made his way towards your table, you quickly looked up at him as he asked you what you'd like, you smiled and asked for a strawberry smoothie and pancakes with blueberries, as you ordered for your food you could feel joost's eyes burning into you, watching every movement as your eyes slowly fluttered and as your finger moved each time you wanted to add something to what you wanted to order, you looked hot. And he had to admit that to himself, he was knocked out of his thoughts once the waiter asked for his turn of food.
"Dont be late huh?" You groaned, "it was the heels fault okay!" He laughed out, you'd always warn him about punctuality when you can't even stick to what you say most of the time, it was always funny, time goes by, 20 minutes, simply you two eating and laughing and chatting, what could be better than this? "Do you wanna go to the park next to this Cafe?" You smiled, he nodded in response, "hell yeah!" You both got up, joost places the money down, "oh come on! Thanks that's really sweet" he shrugs in response, a smile plastered on his face "i told you it's my treat didn't I? Ja?" You walk away together, making your way to the park, sitting down at an empty bench, the trees were absolutely gorgeous, a beautiful mix of green all around, you felt so tense for so long that for once you felt good. With him.
Joost pulls out a cigarette, lighting it up and taking a drag, you sit in silence for a moment, the sounds of birds chirping filling your ears, "you know your really pretty." You continue starring forward, you didn't wanna believe you just said that, you mentally slap yourself, joost tips his head to the side before turning to look at you, taking a drag from his cigarette "oh ja? Is that so?" He smirks at you, you don't stare back though, you nod, "yeah". "Well nothing could be as beautiful as you. Alright?" You can see the smoke coming out of his mouth as he talks, he's gorgeous truly, "can I?" You turn your head to meet his gaze, gesturing to the cigarette, "ja" you take the cigarette into your fingers before taking a drag, you coughed a little, smoking wasn't something you always did. You felt a wet droplet on your forehead, "Huh?"
Joost looks at you, the droplets multiplying, it was clear that it was "raining, it's raining" he chuckled, "we better get going huh?" You quickly got up,"fuck! It's getting worse! We better run!" He quickly pulls your hand before guiding you out of the park, you both giggle as the rain becomes more intense, the sound of thunder waving through the city, "mine or yours!" He practically yells at you, "Yours!" You quickly make your way to joosts house as he opens the door, he closes the door quickly, sighing and gasping for air as you took off your heels, joost following along, "gee that was crazy!" You let out, you both stopped for a moment, starring into eachother, you can tell you synced up in that second because immediately you crash lips and start making out, he roughly pushes you against the wall, his tounge pushing into your mouth, you didn't put up a fight for dominance, not one bit, his hand roaming your body as he gropes your tits, you whimper out as he slowly kisses your neck, "come on." He pulls you by the hand, guiding you upstairs to his room, "sit down liefde" you quickly sit down as he takes off his jacket, his hair all soft and slightly wet, the thunder was clearly still there, rain hitting the window and producing a mystical sound, one you atleast thought was definitely mystical. You unzip your dress as joost slowly pulls it off of your body, leaving you in your black bra and panties, joost bends down to unclip your bra, slipping it off before bending down, his finger hovering over the hem of your panties, "can I take this off too pretty?" You nod slowly, your exhaustion from all the running was evident, he slips off the panties and spreads your legs gently, getting back up, you look up at him, eyes fluttering gently, hooded and cheeks all red and lips parted in a gentle manner, your the image of beauty and he knew it, he brushes a thumb over your lip, "are you exhausted schatje?" You whimper gently, nodding, he slowly presses his body against you, forcing you to lay down, he places both hands on your knees and spread them wide open for him, "gonna make you feel good okay doll?" You nod once again, he bends down , gently rubbing at your clit, you immediately let out a soft whimper, moans and gentle whispers of his name, he licks two of his fingers before slowly rubbing one down your cunt, sliding it in, he pumps it in and out inside of you, you feel his second finger plunge inside of you, you grip the sheets as you groan, your in a daze and the pleasure your feeling is making it worse, your eyes flutter, your spitting out incoherent sentences, you suddenly feel his breath inch closer to your pussy, you whimper once you felt his tounge lick a long strip from down to up, "God you taste amazing" hid thumb still rubbing circles at your puffy clit, you can feel your cheeks heating up as he continues gently pumping 2 fingers in and out of you while sucking your pretty clit, what more do you want other than for joost to completely fuck you and eat you out, your back arches as you instinctively roll your hips, You feel yourself inching closer to the edge as you let out a whimper, "joost! Fuck...m'close" your words are shaky, almost uncertain, your hands roam down to his hair, gripping harshly, you hear him groan and whimper, he's clearly enjoying himself and enjoying the way your pathetically begging for him to let you cum, your legs start trembling as you feel yourself finally get enveloped with that warm good feeling, your thighs close up around his head as you cum on his face, his groans still evident, you whimper and shudder, your thighs slowly parting as to let joost breath, you look down at a smirking joost, head tilted to the side, pussy drunk and completely head over heels for you, "come on, let me fuck you okay?" ...
Side note: if you think you have more requests, for ANY character, or for joost, send a request over! Hope ya enjoyed (´ε` )♡
Extra: I apologize if any of this is corny? Or not well written, the first version was good before it got deleted, I rushed over this. Promise there's better to come. Thanks!
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You're Dead To Me.
Lando Norris x Fem!Reader, Fem!Reader x Uncle
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort
A/N: this is based off a situation that happened to me irl and everything the reader says is basically everything I want to say to this blood relative. (I'm hoping this is therapeutic for me) and as much as I want to I'm not using this relative's real name.
warnings: Cursing, deadbeat uncle, mentions of suicidal thoughts, mentions of attempted suicide, maybe mentions of mental abuse but idk.
NOT PROOF READ!! COULDN'T SEE THROUGH THE TEARS 🤪🤪
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I stared at the text message on my phone. I know I shouldn't answer it but part of me wants to know why he's texting me, why now after all this time he reached out to me?
My uncle (if that's what you could even call him) texted me. Just a plain and simple message: "Can we meet for lunch and talk?" I should've just ignored him like he's done to me for the past 4 years but I like to think that I'm better than that.
"Babe, is something wrong?" Lando asked as he nudged the side of my arm
"Hmm?" was all I hummed while I finally pulled back from my phone
"You've been staring at your phone with a sad look for the past 5 minutes" Lando said as he placed a reassuring hand on top mine
Lando and I were currently having coffee by the kitchen Island in our house. Well I was drinking coffee, Lando was drinking tea.
"Yeah, Jace just texted me. Wants to know if I want to meet with him to have lunch today to 'talk' whatever that means." I said unsure of what emotion to feel right now
"Jace, as in your uncl-"
"DON'T call him my uncle." I snapped as I cut Lando off.
I honestly didn't mean to snap at him but he knows about all the things he's done to me, to my family. He knows that I'm ashamed he's my blood relative and sometimes I wish I never met him.
"Right, m'sorry" A pinch of regret and sadness laced his voice which made me feel even more mad
"No, fuck. M'sorry Lando, you just know how I feel about him and I guess hearing you call him my uncle kinda sent me over the edge." I could feel the lump in my throat and my eyes burn at just the thought of being in front of him.
After a few seconds the silence was broken as Lando started talking "I'll be with you, if you meet with him"
"Yeah, I think I'd like that." I mumbled as I roughly rubbed my face with my palms before picking up my phone and texting Jace back.
Me: 2pm, Holly's Diner. Don't be late and come ALONE. Jace:Thank you.
with a scoff and a sigh I placed my phone down. I had 2 hours before I had to meet Jace, let's just hope I can compose myself.
"Where are we meeting him at?" Lando said as he walked back over to the Island after placing both our mugs in the sink.
"Holly's, 2pm" I said, uncertainty lacing my voice
"Let's get ready then." Lando guided me to our shared room where we gathered all our clothes and thing we'd need for a shower before making our way to the bathroom.
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Lando and I have been waiting in this Diner for what felt like years before I finally looked at the time for what must've been the 7th time since we'd arrived. '1:58' just 3 more minutes and then he's late which gives me the green light to leave and avoid him for the rest of my life.
A ring of the bell above the door pulled me from a thought I wasn't aware I was deep into. Turning my head I'm met with a man who I didn't see as family, the man I saw was a total stranger. It didn't take long for him to spot me too, given that the diner wasn't big.
Once Jace got close enough, I watched as his arms opened as if indicating for a hug, which I quickly shut down with an awkward nod. Jace took the note and just sat in front of us.
"Who's this, I thought we were both coming alone?" Jace said gesturing towards Lando who sat in the booth right next to me
"I told you to come alone, I said nothing about me and this is my boyfriend Lando" I saw Jace reach a hand out to shake Lando's hand and as much as I wanted to pull Lando's hand away, I couldn't make his decisions for him.
Lando opted to quickly shake his hand before letting us talk
"So, why'd you want to talk?" I said coldly while playing the ice in my Dr Pepper, avoiding eye contact
"Right! I'm just trying to make amends with the family, you know how much I love you guys so much and I really want to be in your life again. I know I've been a bit distant with you guys, you especially and I want that all to change. I want to be a better Tio to you, I know it's gonna take time but I'm willing to allow as much time as you need, Valerie also wants to see you again." Hearing him say all of that almost made me to storm out. I felt the lump coming back in my throat and my eyes starting watering. There was no way I was getting through this little meeting without absolutely sobbing and throwing shit at him.
"Are you kidding? You called me here to makes amends? Do you know all the shit-"
"Hey! You know how I feel about curing." He had the nerve to cut me off
"NO! I'm talking! I gave you the floor interruption free so I want the floor interruption free!" I could feel my blood boil and if it warns for Lando right next to me I think I would've absolutely lost my shit already.
Jace just stared at me before slightly nodding his head gesturing me to continue
"Do you know all the SHIT you put me through?? All the shit you put my family thro-"
"They're my family too" oh you're fucking joking me right?
"You have one more time to interrupt me before I walk out and block you" I said sternly as I pointed my finger at the older man in front of me.
I know I should have respect for my elders but I only respect them when they respect me.
"Sir, please let her finish" Lando tried pleading with the man
"This doesn't concern you. I don't know why you're here." Oh NOW I'm fucking done
"Lando, let's go. We're leaving" I said as I started to make my way out of the booth
"No! Please, I'm sorry. We need to talk." Now he wants to listen to me. Unbefuckinglievable.
I felt Lando's hand on my wrist which caused me to look at him. His eyes saying 'just let him hear you out' which made me reluctantly give in and sit back down.
"One more disrespectful remark or interruption, I'm LEAVING"
"Sorry" Jace mumbled
"I don't care what kind of realization you came to that made you realized that you fucked up and wanted us back but its 5 years too late. Do you know how many things I've done in my life that I thought you would be proud of? I tried to call you when I got my permit and you declined the call, I thought you were busy so I waited a few hours before I called you back and you still didn't answer so I let it go. I also tried to call you when I got my license but you also didn't answer, I invited you to my National Honors Society induction ceremony and you didn't show, I invited you to my sweet 16 and you didn't come, I then invited you to my 18th birthday party and surprise surprise you didn't show. Against my better judgement, I invited you to my high school graduation and you told wela that you already had dinner plans and you 'couldn't' move it. Do you know how much each and every single one of those situations hurt me? How much I HATED still wanting your validation even though I knew you couldn't care less? That's only the tip of the iceberg after we moved to Pennsylvania, when we still lived in Florida and we all live together, do you know how much I HATED living there after Valerie and her 2 kids moved in? Valerie never liked me, she and her daughter ALWAYS blamed everything wrong on mean guess what? You NEVER stood up for me once. You punished me for my dirty room even though it wasn't my mess and after you realized that it was in fact Erica's mess and not mine, you never apologized to me. You didn't care for me, didn't love me and you even told me so. Remember that one day in the pool where you told me AND I QUOTE 'you don't get love because you're the middle child' then proceeded to get mad at me when I got upset, claiming that I 'couldn't take a joke'? Well I do because it's fucking drilled in my head. I bet you don't remember the time you punished me so hard for a DIFFERENT mess that Erica made that it really made me believe that you didn't love me and that you really didn't care whether I lived or died so I tried to kill myself that night? I bet you do because my mom absolutely reamed you a new asshole because of it. Yeah, that wasn't the only time I tried to kill myself because of you. I tried 4 separate times and at the time I was mad that God didn't let me die but now I'm kinda happy. I'm happy because I met the love of my life, I have a great job oh and remember my dad's oldest friend Luis? Yeah he took on the role of the uncle you were supposed to be to me and my siblings. Everything you were supposed to go to that you didn't, he went to. He made sure that we knew he loved us, he takes us to the movies, to amusement parks, pools, he's gone on family vacations with us and overall in the last 4 years he's been the 'play' uncle, he's the best uncle I could ever ask for. Oh and I know you just want to be in my life right now because I've had a pretty successful career working for the McLaren f1 team and my boyfriend is an f1 driver, but to give you my answer on whether I'll allow you to make amends with me, my answer is a big fat fucking no." I said as I threw the linen on the table before grabbing Lando's hand and got out of the booth before turning to face Jace one more time "Oh and you're dead to me" I said before Lando and I walked out of the diner.
I somehow didn't cry at all through my whole speech to Jace. I also knew that I wasn't going to be able to hold in all this anger and sadness anymore and soon I was going to breakdown.
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Miraculously, I somehow was able to make it home without crying too. It was only a 10 minute car ride but it consisted of concentrated breathing and occasionally looking up when I could feel the tears well in my waterline.
"Baby, are you okay?" Lando said as he closed and locked the front door.
The second those last three words came out his mouth, the wall I built up came crumbling down and so did I. I just fell to my knees and started sobbing into my palms, I haven't cried this hard since my dad confronted me and started crying about my suicide attempt. I quickly felt Lando wrap his arms around me before gently lifting me up and walking over to the couch before sitting down and placing me on his lap allowing me to sob into his chest, while whispering sweet nothings in my ear the whole time.
We stayed like this for about a good 10 minutes before I stopped crying, well I didn't necessarily stop crying but I wasn't a gasping mess like before.
One thing about Lando? He's one hell of a comforter and I love him dearly for that.
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Sorry for dropping this on you guys but I'm hoping this is therapeutic for me because it allows me to say what I want to say (even if I can't say it to his face)
this really isn't proof read, I literally cant stop crying rn.
taglist:
@luckyladycreator2 @itsmiamalfoy @jeffs77 @ilivbullyingjeongin @forevercaffeinated-lee @daemyratwst @gulphulp @callsignwidow @f1wintermoon13 @teenwolf01 @victoriassecret101 @hiireadstuff @formulaal @eddieharrington @kazza72584 @zabwlky1999 @dark-night-sky-99 @rougekiki @xoscar03 @jess-wither @bountychanti @dhanihamidi @Ggasly.p @tellybearryyyy
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kolyasangel · 8 hours
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oh baby!
synopsis: you have baby fever and nikolai is intrigued...
content: fem!reader, husband!nikolai, fluff, suggestive ending
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You don't even know how you got here. You were currently clothes shopping with Nikolai, but you somehow wandered into the baby's clothing section, looking at the small garments.
"There you are. I've been looking for you." Your husband's voice called for you. It didn't take long for him to find you, so he must've already been nearby. You saw he was holding some things, a few plain shirts and a jacket with a black and white checkered pattern draped over his arm. He noticed the jacket caught your eye, so he held it up for you to see and get your opinion on what you thought about it.
"Do you like it? I saw it and I thought it would suit me, don't you think?"
"Yeah, I do! You know, you really own black and white." You chuckled. Nikolai smiled contently and placed the jacket over his arm again before taking the shopping bags you were holding, wanting to hold them for you. His eyes shifted, suddenly aware of his surroundings.
"Sooo, what are you doing here? Do you have something to tell me?" He nudged your shoulder with his elbow.
"No! I'm just- just.. looking around.." You quickly responded, realizing what he meant by his question.
"Looking around? I don't think these clothes will fit you, dove." He playfully teased as he picked up a baby outfit before placing it back on the rack. You didn't miss the slight smile on his face while he looked at the tiny outfit.
As you two left the baby section, you continued to browse leisurely around different shops with Nikolai, hand holding onto his bicep. This surprised him because you usually didn't like showing such affection in public, but he didn't mind at all, of course. In fact, he loved it, but he couldn't help but notice you were being more clingy than usual.
You've already envisioned countless heartwarming scenarios of Nikolai embracing fatherhood. One in particular was your favorite to imagine, a disheveled and sleep-deprived Nikolai tenderly feeding his newborn from a bottle, the baby's tiny hand holding his finger. Others consisted of him buckling up the child in their car seat, dropping them off on the first day of school, making them laugh uncontrollably by smothering their little face in smooches, and many more. You imagined who your child would look like more, maybe Nikolai. The possibility of them inheriting his beautiful eyes filled your heart with immense happiness.
It's not like you didn't want to tell him, but the uncertainty of what he might say kept you on edge, even if you didn't know for sure. What if he doesn't even want kids? What if he says no? You knew you would have to tell him sooner or later though, since it wasn't like he could read your mind. The last time you even remembered Nikolai ever mentioning or interacting with kids was when he said babies look 'squishy' after an encounter in the grocery store where one kept staring and smiling at him in an aisle. You swore you felt the eggs shoot out of your ovaries as you watched that scene unfold. Something about him with a child just looked so right.
Nikolai wasn't clueless. He had already picked up the hints a while ago and realized that you might be contemplating starting a family, but he still wanted to hear the words directly from your mouth. The idea of starting a family excited him, yet it also made him nervous. While he would be more than happy to have children with you, doubts plagued his mind as he feared he wouldn't be a good enough father. Nevertheless, he would be lying if he said he'd never thought about it before. He would be lying if he said a warm feeling didn't grow in his chest whenever he heard you talk fondly about children.
Later that evening, Nikolai suggested he try some of the new clothing he bought in front of you. You agreed and lay on the bed, watching as he removed his shirt each time, leaving him shirtless and just in sweatpants for a short moment before he tried on the next one. You've seen him shirtless many times, but each time left you absolutely breathless.
He tried on the last shirt, and you gulped as it just had to do him so much justice. It was more form-fitting than the previous ones he tried on, his fingers running over the outline of his toned muscles visible through the fabric.
"I think I should only wear this one in front of you," he laughed as he winked at you flirtatiously before sliding the shirt off, leaving him shirtless once again. This time, it would stay that way. He then removed his hair tie and started to unbraid his hair, catching your gaze and offering a teasing smirk. It took everything in you to not push him down on the bed and-
"You like looking at me, don't you?" He raised his arms above his head, clearly wanting to show off his body for you. It almost seemed like he was doing it on purpose, ravishing your thirst for him.
"I'm sorry.." You don't know what you were apologizing for, your mind scrambled at this point.
"For what, dear? Don't be, you can stare all you want! It's all yours anyway." Nikolai seemed confused at your apology, so he swept some hair behind your ear to get a better look at you.
You stayed quiet, contemplating bringing up the topic now or later, now that you felt hot and bothered by his little show.
"What's wrong, dove? You seem to be lost in thought lately," he asked as he joined you in bed.
"I'm just.. thinking about something." You said.
He noticed your nervous demeanor and tilted your chin with his fingers to make you look at him. "Why've you been so shy with me, hm? You can tell me anything, you know I'll never get mad or judge you," he stroked your cheek gently before his hand trailed down to hold yours.
That's right. You always told Nikolai about anything and everything, so why was this any different? No matter what it was you talked to him about, he always made you feel heard. It was only a question after all, so you decided to just let it go and finally tell him.
"Kolya, what do you think about having kids?"
"Oh my! I knew it." He giggled before patting your cheek, amused at your question. You didn't know what kind of reaction you expected from him, but it certainly wasn't this.
"What do you mean?"
"You think I haven't caught onto your hints? You haven't been so discreet with your actions, sweetheart."
You felt a warm flush of embarrassment creeping up your face as you nervously fiddled with your fingers. It felt like a huge weight had just been lifted off your shoulders. He already knows.
"I know it's a major decision, but I feel ready.. and it's okay if you're not yet, I just thought I should let you know," you stammer.
He reached out and planted a soft kiss on your nose before speaking. "Well, I have thought about it before. Honestly, I don't know how great of a father I would be, but the thought of having a mini version of you running around the house sounds like a dream come true."
You felt a pang in your heart as you heard him speak ill of himself falling short of being a good father. The sad look on his face was discernable, it was the same one he had whenever he thought about the horrible actions committed in the past. It still made him shiver at times, regret consuming his mind whenever he sat on the thought for too long before you recognized his despair, rushing to comfort him.
"Nikolai, I don't think you give yourself enough credit. You're not who you used to be."
It was only natural for him to have worries due to his past, but the mere fact that he cared how he may affect you and his future children indicated that he was a changed man, so you made that point very clear to him.
He smiled at your comment and you felt a surge of emotions as he continued, "When I was younger, I never imagined myself getting married, but now I can't imagine having a family unless it's with you."
"Kolya, that's so sweet. I know this is new for the both of us but we'll work through this together. You're already an amazing husband so I have no doubt that you'll be the best father!" You expressed, gently squeezing his hand. A faint rosy hue dusted his cheeks, flustered by your praise.
"Thank you, dove.. and you're going to be such a wonderful mommy." He sighed as he mused about you being a mother to his children. So gentle, so caring, you would just be perfect. He could already see himself peppering your belly with kisses, blabbering on and on to his unborn child about frivolous things. The more he thought about it, the more he couldn't wait.
"What if I wake up in the middle of the night asking you for pickles and ice cream?"
Your adorable question caught him off guard, making him laugh. He imagined the scene happening in his head, and it was too cute for words.
Nikolai wakes up groggily as he feels you shaking his arm, wanting him to fulfill your request. "Kolyaaa.. I'm hungry and I need pickles with ice cream please.."
"Even if you do, I wouldn't mind at all, darling! If you want to eat ice cream with pickles or any other strange combination, then I'll gladly get it for you. I'll even try them with you."
Your eyes glimmered at his sweet response and trailed down to his chest, fingers running across his abs. You were overcome with so much love for him that you felt you couldn't wait any longer, and it seemed like Nikolai could tell.
"Kolya.."
"Hm?"
"I want to make cute chubby babies with you." You pleaded with cute eyes.
"Yeah? Right now?" He asked as he pulled you closer to him, finger hooking onto the strap of your tank top, sliding it off slowly before placing soft kisses on your shoulder. "How many?"
"Mm, one? No, two.."
"How about ten?"
"N-No! Too many."
He snickered and pushed you down onto the bed, climbing on top of you.
"Well then, we better get started if we wanna make those cute babies~"
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eekshade · 2 days
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hey!! sry for not writing anything for 5 months, school has been yucky, but im back!! i started with an alphabet bc it was an easy way to ease myself back into writing. also happy gay month 🫶
Bucky Barnes Fluff Alphabet
bucky barnes x m!reader
word count: 4.4k
warnings/info: letter J depicts a make out sesh ig, internalized homophobia is mentioned, Buck cries, use of you/your for reader but is said to be male, there are scenes after the hcs for a little bit but I gave up on that lol, made in my notes app so sry for any formatting issues, not proof read
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A - Admiration. (what do they admire about their S/O?)
☆ Bucky loves your hands. He likes how "innocent" they are compared to his. He adores when you hold his hand, especially the vibranium one. It makes him feel all warm and soft. It makes him loved. The kind of love that causes one's stomach to ache, it makes him want to love himself.
The two of you are slowly making your way through the crowded farmer's market, somewhat resembling a can of sardines. You were walking in front of him, taking notice of a small clearing off to the side, grasping his metallic hand, pulling him behind you. He follows without question, a small smile pointed at your two interlocked hands.
Once stopped in the empty area, before you could even think of letting go of him, he pulled you into him, placing his cracked lips onto your own.
"You know I love you, right?"
"Of course I do."
He kisses you again.
B - Boldness. (how bold are they in regards to their S/O? who confessed first?)
☆ Bucky was a confident man in his youth, always the one making the first move. Ever since he started living in Brooklyn again, he started to notice the anxiety crawling up his throat whenever he interacted with others. This is why he wouldn't start talking to you, even if he's interested in you, so you would need to initiate the first few (dozen) conversations before he starts to feel comfortable around you. That being said, given that you've been talking as friends/acquaintances, he'll have no problem asking you out, it might just take me some time.
☆ Once in a relationship he is extremely bold, there are still some topics where he would be more hesitant to talk about (such as the full extent of his past), but when it comes to you he won't having any problem charmin' you like there’s no tomorrow.
Bucky lingers in front of your shared apartment building hoping to catch you on your way home after a day out, he nervously switches from leaning on a tree to sitting on a bench, then back to the tree. He only waits for about five or so minutes before he notices you walking on the pavement leading to the building, but after locking eyes with him, your course changes.
"Hey, Bucky!"
"y/n! I'm glad I caught you, can I walk you up?"
You simply smile and nod in the direction of the door. You smell like newly washed clothes, but to Bucky, it might as well be heaven. You break the silence by asking him about his day, he breifly responds, giving you some of the highlights, you two chit-chat for bit, not able to dive into much as the trip is rather short. By the time you two reach your door, he realizes that he longer can try to find the perfect segue so he might as well just go for it.
"...Well, thanks for walking with me." You smile at him, reaching for the door handle.
"Wait, y/n, I wanted to talk to you about something." You raise your eyebrows as a sort of permission for him to continue.
"I hope I wasn't misreading this, but would you like to get dinner together sometime?" His voice remains unwavering, with a sly smile dancing across his face.
You roll your eyes at his tone, but it's hard to hide the smile forming at the corners of your mouth,"I guess I don't see why not."
"Yeah, yeah," he snickers, "here." It's his number written on the back of receipt, a small smiley face had been drawn next to it, then erased.
"See you, Bucky."
"Bye, y/n."
C - Comfort. (how do they comfort their S/O?)
☆ Bucky is more of an advice guy than a comfort guy, this is due to him getting extremely awkward/uncomfortable during touchy, feely situations (and not because he doesn't know how to confront his own emotions!!). However, he does understand the need for warmth during hard times, he just opts to show it through acts of service instead.
Your thoughts thrash against the walls inside your head, the throbbing only getting worse as you slowly pull yourself out of his bed. Your face caked in sweat and dried tears, your bloodshot eyes drift to the phone resting upon the on of the nightstands, your unsteady hand grips the device, checking the time.
The late afternoon sun coats the walls in an irritable light, despite the curtains being mostly closed. You notice on the second nightstand that he left a glass of ice water (which was mostly melted now) and a note, which read:
"EVERYTHING NEEDED FOR A BATH IS ON THE BATHROOM COUNTER - ILL BE BACK WITH YOUR FAVORITE ASAP :)"
D - Dates. (do they prefer going out or staying in? do they prefer fancy or simple?)
☆ Bucky has a really hard time with this one. All he is used to are the classic dinner and a movie type dates, but in his heart, he likes the more intimate, at home, kind. Over time, he finds a sort of balance between the two, like a picnic at a drive-in movie.
"Bucky, where the hell are we?"
The two of you are currently driving down backroads you've never seen before. The road is slightly too narrow for anyone to get fully comfortable, the night sky darkening the path. Bucky has been relatively quiet, letting you do all the talking, and control the music; he never has liked modern music, but there's something special about when you play it.
"Well, if I tell you it's not really a surprise, is it?" He answered, turning his head to you slightly. The smile on his face is almost aggravating, if it had been anyone else's, you would've jumped out of the moving vehicle.
"You're not funny," you playfully roll your eyes, "if I didn't know you any better, I'd say you're trying to kill me." You pretend to study him as if trying to find a motive.
"Well, I can promise you I'm not doing that." The smile changes to softer, genuine.
The car is almost silent for the rest of the way, the soft music leading you two down the road. The car pulls into an unpaved parking lot, bringing you back to reality. You look around and see a white screen proudly standing twenty or so feet ahead of you, realizing what's going on, you turn to Bucky. A nervous grin shines back at you, he's holding a basket filled with dinner, and movie snacks.
"You like it?"
E - Equal. (are they more dominant or passive?)
☆ Due to Bucky growing up in the 40s, he does still have quite a bit of internalized homophobia. Therefore, he tends to try and be the stereotypical, manly, provider. He does unconsciously feminize you to make himself feel better, but the second he realizes, or you tell him, he'll do everything to stop, as well as profusely apologize.
☆ Other than that, I do see him as being in the middle. He can obviously take control when he needs to, but also because of his past, he loves when you take the pressure off, and take care of him.
(I can't think of a scene for this rn, and I rlly need to finish this so sry, if anyone want more about this just ask)
F - Family. (do they want to start a family?)
☆ Bucky loves kids, and is great with them, but he doesn't want to have his own, at least until he's stable. So for now he's okay with being the cool uncle.
After spending a lake day with the Wilsons, it was noticeable that Bucky wanted to say something. He looked uncomfortable, nervous even as he waited for everyone to finally call it a night. A little after the kids were put to bed, Sarah called it in, then Sam. You went to follow, seeing as it may be weird to stay up longer than the hosts, but Bucky ushered you to follow him to the back deck.
You sat on the stairs next to him in silence, waiting for him to speak, the warm air surrounding you two. He bit his lip and looked at you, studying you.
"I love you," He smiles at you, his tone signifying a second part of what he needs to say.
"But?" You laugh, nervousness now making its way into you.
"But I can't give you this." He has tears in his eyes, threatening to fall if he says anything else.
"What does that mean?" Confusion grips you tightly, his face giving nothing away.
"An apple pie life," he laughs at his own words, "I can't give you the house, and two kids, dinner by 6, it's all too much for that." He looks to the lake as if it could help him.
"Bucky," you gently take his chin, making him look at you, "what makes you think I want that?"
"The way you looked at me," he wipes a fallen tear from his cheek, "when I was playing with Cass and AJ today.
"Oh, Bucky." You kiss a tear away from the side of his nose, "I don't need any of that, hon. I just need you."
G - Goofy. (how serious are they when it comes to a relationship?)
☆ When it comes to a romantic relationship, Bucky can be pretty serious, while he is smooth/sly, 'goofy' isn't really the word I'd use to describe him. Not to say he wouldn't be funny, but I feel as though his humor is more sarcastic than anything.
(same thing as before)
H - Hugs. (how do they hug?)
☆ I imagine Bucky's skin to be cold, so that transfers to his hugs, but he's cold like a soft breeze on a hot beach. His hugs would also be very firm because of obvious reasons. If he's in an emotional mood, they may be slightly too hard, but never enough to hurt you.
You shiver slightly as his arms wrap around your frame, his head resting upon your shoulder. You two stay like that for a moment before he shifts his head into the crook of your neck, leaving a chaste kiss on it before planting his nose to touch your skin; eyelashes softly tickling you as he blinks.
"I miss you."
I - Interests. (what Interests do they want to share with their S/O?)
☆ Bucky's a fucking nerd, his main interests being motorcycles, fantasy novels (reading in general), folklore, and ancient history.
Bucky smiled widely as he firmly gripped some obscure fantasy novel with a dragon on the cover, unintentionally waving it around. He's excitedly explaining the novel to you, about how well written the book is, about how interesting the character dynamics are, and so on. You mirror his smile as you watch him talk, hanging on to every word that falls off his tongue.
You stand, your smile never wavering as you walk toward him, he stops talking, confused. Once you reach him, you pull him into your grasp, kissing his cheek, holding him close.
"What?" His voice lacking confidence, his smile now unsure.
"Keep talking." You mumble into him, "I like it when you talk." He grins and continues his rant.
J - Jealousy. (do they get jealous?)
☆ He can get jealous, this is do to his trust issues, but he's mature enough that he won't be a bitch about it unless you want him to, he'll just talk to you, and the two of you will work through it one way or another. He does get rather clingy when jealous, though, wanting to touch you in some way.
You and Bucky are currently at your workplace, your boss decided in order to boost morale that a company party was needed, and you (thankfully) convinced Bucky to go, promising it'll be quick.
Both of you were chatting with one of your work friends when they asked you to come help them get refreshments, leaving Bucky alone with their spouse. Bucky wanted to be nice, he did, but the spouse would not stop going on and on about some shit Bucky had never even heard of. So, naturally, his eyes wander trying to locate you, hoping that you'll come back and save him from this dreadful conversation, and that's when he saw it. Your co-worker was basically feeling you up, their eyes traced your figure as you bent over to grab a couple of waters from the case on the floor, and when you stood back up they grabbed your waist to "move you out of the way" of someone walking by.
The final straw was when you attempted to walk back to Bucky and their spouse, they grabbed you by the elbow stopping you from moving, the grip wasn't very hard from what Bucky could see, but the look on your face was enough to get him moving.
Bucky walked away from the spouse mid sentence. They called out at him, but he paid it no mind. He reached the two of you, and you smiled at him, saying something along the lines of "What couldn’t stand to be without me?" Bucky rolled his eyes when the co-worker asked what he was doing.
"Sorry to cut this short, but honey, we got to go." Overpronouncing the pet name, as he pulls you toward him.
"What? You just got here!" The co-worker joked, "Come on, y/n! The night is still young." He whined out.
"I'm sorry, but Buck's right. I promised to make dinner tonight in order for him to come." You laughed, pulling Bucky's hand into your grasp, "See you on Monday though." You smiled at them, causing Bucky to tighten the grip of his hand around yours.
The second the two of you walked out of the building Bucky pushed you against the wall of it, just barely out of view from the window, kissing you harshly. You opened your mouth in shock, giving Bucky the opportunity to slide his tongue in. His hands roam your body in search for nothing in particular, he smirks when you moan into the kiss, motivating him to pull as much of those pretty little sounds out of you as he can. He thinks of your co-worker, the slimy bastard, they could never have you like this, this thought makes his smile grow as he attaches to your neck, and slips his knee in between your legs. Once he's satisfied with your disheveled state, he silently walks away to the car, leaving you to follow him, confused, calling out for him to slow down.
K - Kiss. (how they kiss/favorite place to be kissed, and vise versa.)
☆ Bucky’s kisses are tender/soft, this is attributed to him subconsciously not wanting to hurt you in any way, so any time he touches you it's rather gentle. His lips tend to taste a little like blood, because he has a habit of biting them.
☆ His favorite place to kiss you is on your cheek, specifically with his hands on your hips as a form of greeting.
☆ His favorite place to be kissed is his neck, it feels special, a place just for you and no one else, it's a form of intimacy he hasn't been able to truly experience until now. He especially likes it when you hug him from behind kissing up from the top of his spine to his nape hairline.
Bucky uncomfortably cleaned the kitchen as he waited for you to return from work; he had recently moved in to your place, and it was just now starting to hit him how serious you guys were. You and him have been dating for quite a while, he stayed over more times than not, so it was only natural for you to ask him to move in. He said yes of course, how could he not? He thought about the two of you, about him no longer sleeping in your bed, but sleeping in his. Next to you. It's driving him insane, oh god - when did he start crying? Seriously though, how could you chose him? He just doesn't understand how this happened, how could you, of all people, want him? More tears. God, Bucky, pull yourself together man.
His thoughts screech to a halt as he hears the door open, he hears you call out his name, he doesn't respond, wiping the tears, this proved to be a lot harder to do as one's tears are still actively falling. You find him within a few seconds, he's facing the sink, you snicker at his concentration; you walk up to him, making sure not to be silent, though there’s not a doubt in your mind he knows you're there. You wrap your arms around his lower torso, placing your chin on his shoulder. His hands stop moving as he leans into the touch.
"Hey, Buck." You softly whisper, "You get out today?"
"Of course I have." He turns his head down slightly, trying to avoid eye contact, "You worry too much." He grumbles, he attempts to move his arms forward, but stops when he feels your lips graze his nape.
"I like worrying about you." Another kiss. "It keeps me grounded." You laugh into his neck.
"Please." He drags out the word in an almost whiney tone, moving his head back to get even closer to your mouth, "Please don't stop."
You consister teasing him, turning his chin to look at you, but stop when you see his wet cheeks you decide against it. You leave a kiss on the corner of his mouth as a sort of apology, before going back to what you were doing to the back of his neck.
"God, Buck, you know how much I love you?" You mumble into his skin after a few moments.
"No, I don't think I do," He smiles at the wall, "how much?"
You unravel your arms from around him, placing them on his shoulders, turning him to face you. You deeply press your lips onto his nose, causing him to scrunch his face, the kiss makes a humming sound, before a soft pop of your lips.
"That much, times like a thousand." You giggle at his soft expression.
"Wow. That's a lot." He remarks with faux amazement, trying to make it seem like you didn't just make his heart nearly beat out of his chest.
"Yeah it is." You exaggerate the words, gripping his cheeks for one last kiss.
L - Love Language.
☆ Bucky's love language is definitely acts of service. He enjoys doing things for you, and putting his skills to use, I think this can been seen in fatws when he helps Sam with repairing the boat, and getting him a new suit. He likes surprising you with household takes already completed when you get home, he absolutely basks in the praise you give him for doing this.
(yuck. This is where I officially give up on the scenes, as said prior if you want to see any specific ones just ask!!)
M - Meals. (kitchen dynamics.)
☆ Bucky doesn't like to cook with other people, you can watch for sure! But he doesn't like to share the space too closely, it just annoys him when people do things he believes he can do more efficiently.
☆ The two of you will most likely do A/B days when it comes to cooking and clean up, unless one person is pampering the other/it's a special occasion.
N - Nicknames. (what do they call their S/O?)
☆ His nicknames for you are obviously older, and slightly feminine (unless you tell him off), he starts you relationship with names like, doll, darling, and dove. As time progresses he will start incorporating handsome into his list of pet names. All that being said, I don't think he's too into pet names, for the most part he'll just say your real name.
O - Openness. (how open are they about their past/emotions with their S/O?)
☆ He starts telling you about his past in the form of jokes (like that one date scene in fatws). He's able to tell you about everything in a factual tone a few months into dating (just so he knows he trusts you), as far as his emotions surrounding it - that does obviously take longer, but in my opinion not by that much. The amount of emotion shared does vary, but maybe a month or two after he tells you about it for the first time, he'll start venting about his nightmares and such.
☆ also it does depend on how you view/retain media, because you might have already recognized his face/name.
P - PDA.
☆ Bucky is in the middle when it comes to PDA, he likes holding your hand, will give you goodbye kisses and such, but he doesn't go father then that. Half due to his social anxiety, half to him wanting the more intimate things to stay private.
Q - Quarrel. (how they apologize/ how long it takes them to forgive their S/O?)
☆ If Bucky feels he's in the right he can and will be petty, such as brushing you off, or making sarcastic comments. He typically won't confront you because of the attitude he holds, but when you decide to apologize he's ready to talk it out. He accepts your apology in time, (depending on what you did) but he is still standoffish for some time after, due to his trust issues.
☆ When he fucks up he is all over fixing it. He starts the apology in a very formal manner, stating how he knows he what he did was wrong, how he'll do better. The second part of the apology is him being (too) nice for the next week, as said on L his love language is acts of service so he'll overcompensate, and do every task you needed done.
R - Rules. (boundaries they have.)
☆ His "main" boundaries are focused around his past, such as you're not allowed to pry when it comes to asking about it - he will talk about it in his own time. You're also not allowed (at least for a long time) to touch the scars he has next to where his arm is attached, or the attachment itself. As far as other boundaries go, he doesn't want you to go further than hand holding, and a quick goodbye kiss in public, and he hates it when you pity him out right - keep that in your head.
S - Security. (how protective are they of their S/O?)
☆ He is very protective of you, not in a weird controlling way, but he always checks in out of fear someone will use you to get to him for one reason or another. This protectiveness isn't really that obvious, more just him checking in on you, and keeping an eye out when you're out together.
T - Time. (how long does it takes to fall for their S/O?)
☆ Bucky does take quite a bit of time to actually fall in love, but him finding you attractive/intriguing is very fast if not immediate. It takes about 2-3 months for him to ask you out (though he does flirt for a while first), and about 5-7 months of dating to "love" you.
U - Upset (what things upset them in a relationship?)
☆ He can get upset from a few things namely; everything said in R, when you grab him first in his post nightmare state or during/after a panic attack (he wants to be the one to initiate contact, because sometimes he doesn't want to be touched), and if you disagree on politics - although Bucky isn't the kind of guy to compromise on those so it most likely won't happen, because he wouldn't be dating you in the first place.
V - Vacation. (what kind of traveler are they with their S/O?)
☆ Bucky's a NERD!! He likes to go to places with rich history/culture, and he won't take a second to rest, he just wants to see everything, can you blame him? If you're the kind of person who wants to spend a day relaxing by the pool, I'm sorry, but he will leave you behind without hesitation.
W - Words. (promises they make to their S/O.)
☆ Bucky promises to never hurt you in any way shape or form, he promises to protect you agianst others who wish to harm you, and he promises to never leave you behind as he doesn't want anyone, especially you, to feel how he felt.
X - Xenial. (how they make you feel welcome/what makes them feel welcome?)
☆ Bucky likes to do little things for you to make you feel welcome/comfortable around him. This comes in different shapes and forms, such as complimenting you in every which way, making mental notes of things you like, and always being ready to help you out with anything you may need.
☆ Bucky feels the most welcome when it's explicitly said that he is. You using your words to validate him, not even compliment him, but just say he's doing fine, it does more for him then you could imagine.
Y - Yearning. (do they miss their S/O easily? what do they do about it?)
☆ Bucky is able to survive being isolated for long periods of time, even going as far to do it intentionally, but you've weakened him. He misses you rather fast. Now, it's not like he's going to cry over it or anything, but he will sometimes sit up at night unable to sleep without you next to him.
☆ Let's say that you two, for whatever reason, can't call. Bucky is an old fashioned guy, he likes to keep a least one physical photo of you on him at all times. He says it's his good luck charm; he would never tell you however, is that when you two are separated he keeps the photo as close as possible at nights because it calms him down from his nightmares.
Z - Zzz. (sleeping habits/how they cuddle.)
☆ As said so many times throughout this list, Bucky gets nightmares, and sometimes he can't fall back asleep afterwards so he gets up to go do his own thing, because of this while the two of you do sleep near eachother, you rarely cuddle. It's not even that he doesn't want to cuddle, he does, it's the fact he feels like a burden any time he wakes you, so instead he lied and told you he doesn't like them.
☆ Other sleep facts about him is that he runs hot at night, somewhere earlier it's said he's cold to touch, but for whatever reason he can not have more than one blanket on him, plus your body heat.
☆ His typical sleepwear is a pare of shorts, and if you want to count them, his dogtags. During the colder months he'll add a long sleeve shirt, or even just a standard tee, depends on his mood.
MARVEL MASTERLIST
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melverie · 1 month
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Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh today I've been constantly experiencing the urge to un-private today-in-the-devildom & start writing for it again
#i'm gonna ramble in the tags but#i've been talking with starr (if you're reading this--hi starr!! <3) about the blog today and sharing some of the entries#and it just made me miss it so much#+ the conversation actually made me realize some other reasons why i didn't enjoy the blog in general anymore#like i genuinely love the blog and i genuinely loved writing for it & that conversation reminded me of that#but also there were so many reasons that ultimately pushed me to more or less abandon the blog & then later private it too#so i'm kind of at a loss here#tbh i think i'm mostly just scared to pick the blog up again only for it to end exactly like last time i picked it back up#i've actually always wanted for the blog to be a source of inspiration y'know?#like the things mentioned in the entries are kinda just small ideas right#i was hoping that people would read these & feel inspired to write or draw something of their own based on my entries#that was actually what made me start the blog in the first place. the hope that i could inspire others that way#aaahhhhhh.... maybe it's on me since i could have more openly communicated that idea......#i did get to meet one wonderful person who wrote a few fics based on my entries tho!! (hi ali <3)#but yeah..there's that#also the way engagement just dropped significantly after a while#like i know i was gone for a good while & that a lot of people left the fandom and all that#but still getting maybe one reblog if i'm lucky really feels like a punch to the gut#ESPECIALLY considering that i was close to 900 followers on there#do you guys know that feeling when you proudly show someone you care about something you did only to get a disinterested answer?#yeah...#that's essentially how it feels like to me#and well as you might know the feeling of “why should i keep writing if apparently no one cares” eventually won... haha.....#but aaaahhhhh i'm still clinging onto the hope & what ifs here#that conversation with starr really just made me forget about everything that frustrated me about the blog & left me with this#longing feeling to start again lol#hey if you've made it this far into the tags let me just ask--would you care if i picked the blog back up?#would you also *show* that you care?#i'm actually quite curious (you could almost call me george lol)#anyway maybe we'll see each other on today-in-the-devildom again in the future.. who knows
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fraudulent-zodiac · 30 days
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david-watts · 4 months
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really interesting how some people on this site, who seemingly are the type to be smug about the fact they have no trouble with critical thinking skills too, will take their opinion on something subjective and pretend it's objective fact. what's the definition of subjective again
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thecherrygod · 4 months
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#my posts#you know how this usually goes#i make an amount of tags so that if you read this its bc you've clicked and its not bc i am just posting it like whatever lmao#... unsure if i should even post it tho but what else do i do just leave it in my brain? idk maybe its the same maybe its better#maybe its worse? .... why have i been feeling kind of like this and at this kind of intensity for like about 2 weeks or more#2 weeks is how long ive been properly aware so i think its more but like. man.#like maybe its been like a month and i just havent been keeping track of time bc january is way too long to even try lmao#. but. idk. i just wish i could be kinda.. stable. like i cant feel good lmao#like it truly doesn't matter nothing is good enough in general#what i do isnt good enough#what goes on around me doesnt help trying to ignore the constant.. dread?#and like all things considered i should be doing good currently#or at least not this bad#but here i am constantly trying to not let myself feel too bad until im alone bc man.#so... yeah it just doesnt feel like anything is truly worth it not me as a person nor the things i do nor the things i experience lmao#also lately ive been just feeling more..... disconnected to others... like i dont understand them and they dont understand me#but like.. more than usual#and i guess its me? that it's kind of a me problem#idk I'm just tired. i need to sleep. i want to let face down on some sort of big water body or do something that will make my life worse#or they i will regret lmao#i. wont do any of those#also when i mean face down in some sort of bldy of water or whatever i dont necessarily mean like die#not against it but its not the only option#just lay there and float..... also not against it#i just want something that i cant have i guess bc im not sure what it is#like i just know what i want is to not constantly feel like this but idk how lmao#... u would sleep if i can bc man also I'm so tired#.... adding tags its a bit worse than I assumed lmao im also thinking about wether i deserve stuff or not lmao#like it got windy and cooler and i was like 'a blanket by my legs would be nice' only to be like 'no you don't deserve that ' like ah yeah#its kinda worse than i thought lmao
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martsonmars · 1 year
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desperately trying not to have a panic attack about university hehehe
#literally the only thing i'm supposed to do is study#am i doing it? nope of course. i have less than a month left to take exams and i should take at least 2 but i haven't opened a book in more#than a month and the thought fills me with dread and i literally physically cannot do it#it's possible that going back to my uni flat would help (it would be a change in scenery for sure) but on wednesday it will be a year since#my father died and there's this fucking church thing and my mother won't force me to stay but i really should. shouldn't i?#after all it's already saturday and i've already wasted 40 days. what's half a week more?#i keep staring at the list of exams and i know that if i spent every waking second studying i could get back on track and graduate when i'm#supposed to graduate but 1. it's not healthy and 2. my brain refuses to study for ONE exam let alone 14 so it's unrealistic#and at this point i should just accept that i'm going to graduate one year late and one year after all my friends because last year i did#absolutely nothing. and last autumn started out great. i moved. i was organised. and then the first week of october my mother was at the#hospital and i had to go home for a week and somehow i let that week screw up my entire semester#and now i'm panicking because i have only 18 days before the exam i'm supposed to take and it doesn't feel enough for everything i have to#study but it's not going to get better if i just let all the days pass without doing anything but i can't i can't i can't#so yeah i should be kind to myself and accept i'll need one additional year for all the exams and take it slowly which is the only way to#actually get things done. but i don't want to. i don't want to tell my mother that i failed at the one thing i'm supposed to be doing#but i really really can't it's hard and i'm failing and my head is screaming that i don't deserve hobbies and yet i keep wasting my days#it's one am and i should either sleep or relax because it's not like i can do anything now and yet i feel like i need to fix my entire life#right this second or i'll explode. i'm so tired of my thoughts.#please ignore all this ^ because i know most of it is irrational or whatever and i DON'T WANT to hear rational things#if you've read until here and really want to say something just tell me that right now i'm allowed to relax#any other comment would make me feel worse#💖💖💖#**one month left to take exams this semester not forever hahaha but then i'd be supposed to take all the remaining exams in the summer#and i can't possibly take 14 exams between now and july which is why i'm panicking (there are other logistically confusing things in what i#said but i wanted to clear this one up at least lmao) (i'm already feeling vaguely better can't you see?)
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maddy-ferguson · 8 months
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now that i've read both the haunting of hill house and the turn of the screw i do have to ask why mike flanagan is adapting things he doesn't even seem to like
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primofate · 3 months
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Confessions Series - Part 2: Description [Genshin Impact Male Characters]
In a nutshell: He asks if you have your eyes set on someone. You start describing HIS features and watch for his reaction. (Hint: He likes you too)
Other works in this series: (Part 1 - Overheard)
Warnings: The usual, haven't written in a while, please forgive mistakes, bit of angst in Diluc (couldn't help it), I am a sleep deprived mother, some profanity, for some reason did not feel like writing Zhongli though he's one of my faves.
Characters: Aether, Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Baizhu, Bennett, Chongyun, Cyno, Dainsleif, Diluc, Gaming, Heizou, Itto, Kaeya, Lyney, Neuvillette, Scaramouche, Tartaglia, Wriothesley, Xiao, gn!reader
Personal Favourites: Diluc, Wriothesley
Aether
"Yeah, I do," you start. "He's very selfless...He's always running around helping other people,"
Aether nods, intense gaze in his eyes while listening.
"Hmm...He has...a partner. Like a companion he always travels with..."
Aether's brows start to furrow and his head tilts the slightest bit. Paimon flying next to him has no clue who it is whatsoever.
"He's not originally from Teyvat...He's on a journey, you see..." this is where you start getting nervous
You see it click in Aether's head slowly, and his eyes start to widen the slightest bit
"Hey, that sounds an awful lot like you, traveller! Why have we never met this person before, Y/N?" Paimon asks and you only smile.
"P-Paimon," Aether glances at her and then back to you. It's silent for a moment. Paimon is super confused.
But Aether being Aether didn't want to get the wrong idea and racks up the courage to ask you one last question. "He's on a journey...to look for his twin sister?"
You smile the brightest smile you've ever given him. "Correct!"
"Ah...Well..." Aether starts to feel the heat on his cheeks. "That's..." he doesn't say anything else for a few seconds. "Don't get me wrong, I'm just...I'm happy!"
Is basically flustered when he realizes you've technically just confessed to him.
Albedo
"Simply put, I think he's dedicated to his craft," You shrug and smile
"...An admirable trait," he responds.
"He's frequently in Dragonspine. He spends a bit of time in his lab there," you decide to just go straight for the obvious.
Albedo pauses. "I...see..." Turns to you with a small smile "I wasn't aware that you were that fond of me,"
"Now you know," you simply say and try to play it off with a wave of your hand.
He chuckles under his breath and strides over to you while saying. "Well then, I suppose it's my turn to talk about the person I've set my eyes on,"
Proceeds to describe you accurately, down to your likes and dislikes. In his eyes, you seem like something so precious and you can't help but feel a bit embarrassed.
Alhaitham
"Hmm... Sort of," you explain. "He's a little...hard to reach,"
Alhaitham "...and you still pursue him?"
You laugh a bit "I'm hardly pursuing him, I'm just...observing. I like watching him, even though he has the most unreadable face I've seen,"
Alhaitham goes quiet for a moment. He catches on fast, he already has an idea but is cautious about what he says. "...I see," he doesn't ask anything else, but you continue to offer information.
"He likes reading. Really smart guy...but kind of no nonsense type. Very straight to the point," You begin to feel a little nervous so you pretend to read your own book with a small shrug.
The silence is deafening.
"I suspect that type of person will be hard to put up with," he suddenly says aloud and you chuckle in response.
"Possibly, but he seems to be putting up with me too...I guess?"
He suddenly closes his book and leans forward to pry the one in your hands away. He locks his gaze with you. "...'Putting up' is hardly the word I would use." his lips twitch the slightest bit before continuing. "He has little to no patience for other people...so if he keeps you around...perhaps it signals something else,"
"Something else...As in, I'm special?"
Again he quiets for a moment, before he stands up, chair scraping the floor. "...Precisely," he turns to start walking out of the library, waving a hand behind him. "I'll pick you up in the morning tomorrow,"
Ayato
"I do, but he's a very busy sort of man,"
Ayato "Is that so?" he pours tea for you.
"Quite. He's also a very important person,"
He hums and watches the billowing steam from the tea. "It sounds as if I might know this person," but he genuinely doesn't know it's him, he just thinks its another noble.
"...You most definitely know him. He has a sister. Lovely girl." This is where you avert your gaze from him in fear of him instantly connecting the dots.
He talks in pauses "A...sister..." His mind is starting to make connections but he can't be quite sure yet. So he prods further. "...Does she happen to have a vision?"
"A cryo vision holder, yes," you're biting the inside of your lip at this point. There's a moment of silence before you hear Ayato laughing rather gleefully, like he was amused by a story.
"I see." he ends with a chuckle. "I apologize for being so busy, Y/N," he smiles at you "I promise I'll do my best to arrange my priorities in order to spend more time with you,"
Baizhu
"He takes his job too seriously and can be quite reckless...Sometimes he even puts himself in danger,"
Changsheng catches on immediately. The snake had already known for a while. Baizhu was just being dense. "Oh here we go," the snake half whines.
Baizhu gives it a weird look before turning his attention back to you. "That does sound reckless,"
"I've told him a couple of times to think about himself too...but I guess he's just really passionate about his job,"
Baizhu sort of shrugs, "What IS his job?"
"...Well for starters he owns a pharmacy around town,"
To Baizhu the realization hits all too slowly. It's not that he was slow or dense, but he was having a hard time believing that it was him you were talking about, specially when you hadn't said it outfront.
"...You do realize I'm the only one who owns a pharmacy around town?" he asks, eyes piercing through you and awaiting your answer.
Changsheng is the one who answers for you. "Yes you ridiculous doctor, Y/N's pertaining to you!"
It's the first time you've seen him blush and he turns his head away when he does so. "I-I see, well...that's rather, unexpected...but not unwelcome,"
Clears his throat "Just give me a moment"
Changsheng would roll its eyes if it could.
Bennett
"Has a lot of energy...Sometimes I wonder where he gets all of it. I really like him for that though."
Deflates as soon as you start talking about your "crush". What kind of answer was he expecting anyway? That you had eyes for him?
"He has a bit of a...problem when it comes to luck," you continue
Bennett stops, you look at him and you can practically see the gears in his head starting to turn a little faster.
"Y-Y/N? Are you talking about..." then the gears suddenly stop. "Oh what am I saying, it can't be. Ahahaha! Let's go!" starts walking again as if nothing happened
Your jaw drops and you're forced to just DIRECTLY tell him you're talking about him.
"...Oh...Oh! F-For real?! Oh...Sorry... I just thought... there's no way! B-But, I'm really glad! Really!"
Chongyun
"Hmm...He's a little shy...but he's very responsible,"
Chongyun stares at you intently and nods as if taking notes.
"He doesn't like spicy stuff,"
Chongyun nods twice, eagerly.
"He's very dedicated in learning about thaumaturgy,"
Chongyun blanks out, brows furrow but still nods. Slowly.
"He's really good with a claymore too!"
Chongyun stops and stares at you, you see a hint of red gracing his cheeks "Y/N...You can't possibly be...talking about... m-m-m-"
Can't seem to say it, so you outright say that it is, in fact, him.
Combusts into a tomato red
Cyno
"How do I say this...He's a pretty strict guy." The two of you are playing Invokation TCG during this convo.
"Mmhmm..." Cyno is focused on his cards, frankly he doesn't give a craps ass who you're into. He didn't even know why he asked, he just dug himself a hole.
"...but he really only takes his work seriously. It's his job to be serious, I guess. I think that's what Matras need to do," he finished his turn and its yours now, though he's still studying his cards intently. Until you get to the Matra part.
"He's a Matra?" You rarely see a surprised face on Cyno so you focus your gaze on him. "Which one?" He further asks. Honestly he looks about to murder someone.
You blank out a bit at how intense his stare was, "Well...You know. That one, the one who's really into Invokation TCG,"
He immediately follows up without missing a beat "I don't know anyone else who's into--" then it clicks.
It was so damn silent for a good 10 seconds. You clear your throat, tear your eyes off him "Um, it's your turn,"
STILL doesn't budge until he finally goes back to his cards with a whisper, you can't really tell but he looks slightly bashful and you can barely, BARELY hear him "...If I win then we go on a date,"
"Okay, and if you lose?"
Cyno "...I'm not gunna lose,"
"See, I told you he's a really serious guy,"
Dainsleif
"I think he's a very dedicated person," you get lost in thought a little, thinking about him. "Whenever I look at him...Sometimes I feel as if there's a certain sadness in him... Perhaps he blames himself for not being able to protect his nation,"
He IMMEDIATELY knows. And he knows that you hurt for him too. How could he not?
"He searches for answers... I don't know for how long, I suppose a long, long time," you close your eyes, imagining how long he must have been wandering Teyvat.
You only open your eyes when you feel a hand brush against yours. He's looking straight at you, neither happy nor sad. "...You don't have to feel that way, for my circumstances,"
The brush against your hand disappears and reappears next to your cheek, his fingers gently resting on it "...Knowing that you feel that way, has taken away some of the burden that I shoulder,"
His gaze suddenly hardens and his voice drops to a whisper, "But please, just don't end up in the same way as everyone else,"
Diluc (I don't know why I end up writing a whole novel for this guy. I guess he's my OG favourite)
You pause for a moment, wondering how to describe Diluc. "...Sometimes... I feel as if I know a lot about him and yet... he's still far off in the distance,"
Diluc, rifling through paperwork, doesn't even look at you. "...That tells me nothing about him," there's a bit of bite in his statement.
You sigh a little, "I mean, simply said he's a hardworking man. He always has Mondstadt's best interests in mind...but he prefers to work alone,"
He's silent, but you can still hear the paper shuffling.
"....but people love him. They care for him. I suppose I understand why he keeps a distance but..." at this point you don't even realize that you're just rambling and staring into space. Sort of in a daze of thinking out loud. "...isn't it lonely? ...I suppose I shouldn't assume how he feels. Maybe he's fine with it...I just wonder how long till he sees us..." there's silence, no ruffle of papers, you're still just staring at the bookshelf and you continue in a monotone voice. "...or sees me,"
You blink, and all of a sudden its as if a magic spell is cast on you and you wake up to the reality that you've been rambling about him. You sit up straight "Oh," then turn to him with a careful smile. You don't think he knows what or who you're talking about anyway. "I better get going," you stand, "Jean must be waiting for me."
You leave, and he doesn't stop you.
You don't really think anything of it, feeling as if your whole monologue was very vague...but to your surprise he knocks at your door in the evening, there's a bit of rain falling.
"Diluc? You're drenche--"
"I see you,"
The determination in his voice lulls you to keep quiet and only stare up at him, wondering if he had more to say, but instead of saying something, he leans in, wrapping his arms around you and resting his forehead on your shoulder, as if he had been defeated.
You only welcome his embrace, and, for the first time in a long time. Diluc finally feels like he's home.
Gaming
"Passion!" You nod your head as you say it. "He knows what he wants to do and is incredibly dedicated to it!"
Gaming looks surprised, has no idea you're talking about him. "Huh! That's really cool!" He thinks he's the total opposite. "Wish I could be as dedicated as him."
You kind of laugh out loud and he raises his eyebrows and tilts his head. "What?"
"Gosh you really sell yourself short," you shake your head "Anyway, this guy, right, he kinda works two jobs," you put out your hand to count one and two "One, for the Secure Transport Agency and two, he's in a Wushou Troupe,"
Gaming instantly straightens his back and looks at you wide-eyed. You figure you had to be direct when it came to him otherwise he'd never get it with how modest he was.
"...You're...talking about...me?" You smile at him sympathetically.
"You know, Gaming, I wish you saw yourself the way others saw you. You're a great person,"
Big smile, but legit looks like he's about to cry. "Between the two of us? I think you're greater Y/N,"
Heizou
"...Honestly he's kind of a flirt," you raise your eyebrows at the fact and kind of question yourself why you like this kind of person. "Makes me wonder if he does that to everyone, you know?"
Heizou hums and puts his hand under his chin in a "thinking position"
"That's not enough evidence to go by. Perhaps we can investigate this guy together to see if he's worthy,"
You look at him, pursing your lips while musing and giving him a suspicious look. You're not sure if he's figured it out.
He's got no idea. I mean, it was a pretty general description. "Any distinguishing features?" he asks.
You look at him in a deadpan manner. "Red hair, I guess. And moles under his eyes,"
He looks back at you with a matching blank face.
Then breaks into a wide, close eyed grin. "I see! From experience, that person is truly trustworthy,"
You sigh a little, "Is he though?"
He chuckles heartily. "I promise you he is," offers you his hand with a genuine smile. "Let me show you,"
Itto
"Ummm... big, tall, strong looking guy. Intimidating at first look but he's actually a dork," you explain.
Itto crosses his arms above his chest with an unamused face. "Tch! No way! Ain't no one taller than me in Inazuma!" Then he looks smug again. "Anyway, keep goin'. What else?" Only asked you because he wants to see what your "type" is.
"...Popular? Nah... Infamous is the word, I think. He kinda gets into a lot of trouble,"
Itto raises a brow "You serious? Whaddyou want with someone like that?" as if he wasn't a troublemaker himself.
"I mean... He also loves life and somehow always sees the good side of things."
Itto "Eh... guess that's a good thing..." folds his arms behind his head and huffs.
This guy is never gunna get it so you drop more obvious hints. "He's an oni who has his own gang."
For a split second he looked like he was going to get it, and then... "WHAT?! There's another oni who wants to challenge the Arataki Gang?"
"That's not what I--"
punches his fist onto his palm "Lead the way Y/N, let me at 'em!"
"I'm talking about you!"
"Huh?"
"Itto, there's no other oni around town!" leave it to him to make you exasperated.
He quiets for a few seconds. "...But Y/N..."
You expectantly stare at him, curious what he was going to say about your confession.
"...Did you just call me a dork?"
Of course that's what he picks up on.
When he finally processes it though, he's stoked and on an all time high.
Kaeya
"...good at talking to people, and he knows it... Exudes charisma like he breathes air," You're saying this with a glare.
He chuckles and rests his head on his fist. "Why, pray tell, do you look angry when saying that?"
"Not angry..." you mumble under your breath, eyes trailing away from him. "Just... probably a lot of people like him,"
"And you don't like that?" He smirks. He totally knows.
"...No...Well...I'm okay with it... It's just... I think he's so much more than what he shows to others,"
That, he wasn't expecting. He actually feels genuinely touched.
"Sure he jokes around a lot...Is good at making people feel comfortable...but he's also kind...and you can always count on him," there's a faraway gaze in your eyes now, a small smile on your face. "To me, he's...a safe space."
Kaeya's smile drops. It looks like he's unhappy and you think that maybe you've made a mistake. Still...there's no way he knows that it's him, right? It was kinda vague...
You're about to stand and excuse yourself but he catches your wrist easily. "...You know..." he starts, meeting you eye to eye. He looks at you as if he's looking into your soul, his eyes the gentlest you've seen them.
"You make it so hard, not to fall deeper in love with you,"
Lyney (I have no idea how this ended up so dramatic)
"He isn't exactly a trickster...but he has a lot of tricks up his sleeve,"
Lyney "Oh?" Raises an eyebrow. Something kind of clicks in him, but he shakes it off. "The good kind or the bad kind?"
You stall a little, thinking of the answer, knowing that he's Fatui. "The...good...kind,"
"You don't sound very sure," he gives you a lopsided smile.
"It's complicated," you admit. "Regardless of the circumstances though, I think he's a great magician,"
You watch his face turn into surprise quite quickly, but he still looks and feels unsure of himself. "Oh, perhaps...I can learn a thing or two from him?"
Your smile turns forced and hard. He can't be serious? He STILL doesn't know, or...what?
"I...Well..." You don't know what to say next, but he seems to get the idea.
"Sorry, have I put you in a hard place? Ahaha..." Scratches the back of his head. "My apologies, I was just curious,"
This, for some reason, really puts you off and you feel as if you've been rejected, even though you technically had not outright told him that you're talking about him.
It seems silly for you to get upset, but you are. So you stand, and make a request of him. "Can we... just pretend this conversation didn't happen?" and you give him some sort of excuse that you need to run an errand or something, and you're off, leaving him feeling...guilty. But he doesn't know why. Or does he?
Lyney would look like the type of person who would be confident about himself. But, really, as a magician, he had to be 1000% sure about something before he went ahead with it, and so...that's where his doubt stemmed from.
Lynnette is really the one who knocks some sense into him. "...and you...let Y/N leave?" after hearing the story from him.
"Oh, Lyney... Regardless of what Y/N feels... For you, next to Freminet and I, is there someone else that you love dearly?"
That's how he ends up at your doorstep. Though you've seen his disappearing rose trick hundreds of times, he was the most sincere at that moment, when he says sorry that he didn't get the hint and to give him a chance.
Neuvillette
"Serious person. He seems to put his work first, above all else," you say. "I respect him a lot for that,"
Neuvillette is interested in what you say, but doesn't know at all that it's him. "He does sound quite respectable," he says while looking through some files.
"A long time ago he said that he feels like he's an outsider...but really I feel like there isn't anyone who knows Fontaine the way that he does,"
Neuvillette, moves the file he was reading downwards, just to look at you questioningly. "He's from Fontaine?" this was surprising to him.
"Well...he currently resides in Fontaine, yes," you nod.
"Ah," he answered curtly. "And I have never met him?" he asks.
"...He's very busy." you bite your lip, about to say something and you know that the next sentence is the point of no return. "He's the Iudex...so it's hard to catch him,"
You swear you can hear your heart hammering in your chest.
You see him put his files down and just stare at you with a sort of...unsure look.
His shoulders relax, he wasn't even aware he had been tense that whole time. "That... must have taken a lot of consideration and courage to say," he clears his throat.
You only nod your head slowly, moving your gaze away from him with an awkward smile. Hand absentmindedly grabbing a book and flipping through the pages...you had no idea what you were doing out of nervousness.
"I apologize...I'm unfamiliar with what to do in these kinds of situations... However," he pauses and seems to think carefully about what he was going to say next. "Please don't take it as a rejection. I'd be honored to navigate this with you, if you would so graciously have me,"
Scaramouche
"He's an asshole," you bite back a laugh.
He instantly knows.
"Actually he acts all tough only to give in to his inner-kind-of-agreeable-personality,"
He snorts
"What? Am I wrong?" you challenge him. You KNOW that he knows. The two of you have been hovering around each other for a while, and there's a certain closeness between the two of you. Though that line was never crossed.
He doesn't answer you back but prods you more. "Is that all? You like that he's an asshole? Are you some type of masochist?"
You almost laugh. "No, you moron. I'm saying he has a weird way of showing he cares. He's always biting my head about not being careful enough. But if he really didn't care he wouldn't be screaming at me, you know what I mean?"
Scaramouche grumbles something under his breath and crosses his arms, turning away from you.
"Say that again?" You ask, not hearing what he said.
"...I said, you're not as stupid as I thought you were," shrugs his concealed embarrassment off and turns back to you all nonchalant again. "Anyway, stop yapping and get going, we got things to do,"
Snatches your hand and starts pulling you to walk with him.
Tartaglia (I feel like this is ridiculously short but I also feel like Tartaglia would have known a LONG time ago if the two of you had the feels for each other)
"Oh man...Probably the most reckless man I know,"
Also knows. Instantly. But shuts his mouth just so he can listen to you talk about him, but it gets deep real quick.
"In my opinion he's a handsome guy. Real charming," you smirk the tiniest bit. "but I don't know if I can keep up with him, honestly. It's a little hard not knowing when he's going to come back...or if he's even gunna come back at all,"
You weren't going to hide the fact that you were scared shitless he didn't return from Fontaine for ages. You legitimately thought he had died.
Tartaglia stops you there, by suddenly cradling your cheek. "Y/N," he's wearing a pained expression. "I'm sorry,"
"Don't be, it's your job, right?" You reassure him, and shrug.
He sighs "Yes, but I'll promise this to you as I've promised my family," he smiles, the most confident smile you've seen on him. Even more confident than when he wields his blades. "I'll come back to you, I always will,"
Wriothesley
"Er... How do I say this... He kind of has some... big boss energy?"
"Oh?" he sips at his tea, glancing at you while he looks at today's paper. "So he's a bigshot?" he asks curiously.
"Somewhat, yes. Intimidating at first look, but...he just has a great sense of responsibility," you pick at the selection of cakes and cookies he has.
"Huh," he lets out in a quick huff. In the deepest, DEEPEST parts of his mind there is a NANOSECOND that he thinks its him but it gets erased so quickly he's not even sure that he had thought about it.
"Sounds like a good person... Any interesting, weird quirks?" he grins as he says this, yet again glancing at your expression.
Your lips tremble a bit at what you're about to say, because you're SURE he was going to get it once you say it. You gulp and feel the hairs at the back of your neck stand before you say out loud "He likes tea. I kind of wonder if it's an addiction," you can't meet his eyes.
He's looking at the paper he's reading but nothing.registers.in.his.brain.its.like.it.stopped.working.
You shift in the uncomfortable silence but he calmly folds up the newspaper and places it on his table. "...I'm inclined to ask, because it would be embarrassing if I got the wrong idea,"
"Mmhmm," you pop a cookie in your mouth to distract yourself.
"By any chance, are you...talking about me?"
"Mm," you nod your head, still not looking at him and glue your eyes on the cookies instead, out of embarrassment.
Suddenly chuckles. You brave a peek at him, now covering his eyes with a single hand, head tipped back to rest on his chair.
You're not sure if that's a good or bad thing.
"Sorry, no, it's just... I didn't think it would happen this way." Visibly takes in a big breath and sighs it out slowly. Seems to have regained his composure and is back to his confident self, smiling at you. "Thanks Y/N, I... don't think it's much of a secret that I enjoy your company too. I'm just a little embarrassed that you beat me to it...some big boss energy huh?"
Xiao
"...He takes on everything by himself. I worry about him," You look at the stars as you say this. Xiao doesn't say anything.
"But I'm glad that he's opening up a lot more now. It's great to see him among friends,"
Xiao has a feeling at this point, that its him you're talking about, but he still doesn't say anything and keeps his gaze in front of him rather than on you.
"Yes, the road in front of him is long but...he's also already come a long way," you sigh a little "The time of Rex Lapis has long gone, but he still sticks to his principles. I think his dedication is part of what I like about him,"
This is when he turns to you, blank look on his face, contemplating on what to do. When you turn to meet his gaze, its then that he decides to bridge the gap between the two of you, shoulder to shoulder, leaning in sideways to catch your lips in a chaste and rather shy kiss.
"You should give a bit of credit to yourself, for putting up with me all these years, Y/N,"
End!
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4K notes · View notes
toxicanonymity · 11 months
Note
omg the way every inch makes me drool idk what u did to me i haven’t been the same since 😃 ur so talented i owe u my kidney for that fic alone ! would ever consider part two?? no pressure !!!
EVERY INCH 2
2200 words, m!ghostface x f!reader
follows Every Inch. NEXT: Every inch 3
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SUMMARY: Last time you saw ghostface, he was unconscious from the car wreck and you had your way with him. Now, he's coming to take what's his. A/N: He's never unmasked so ANY Ghostface with a 🍆. Thank you so much for all the love on my first Ghostface fic. This was a "one shot fail" because of the engagement & enthusiasm so keep that in mind. night walks coded. WARNINGS: I8+ piv, noncon, ghostface calls himself daddy once, peeping tom, dirty talk, masturbation (both), knifeplay, hair pulling, manhandling, choking kinda, degradation, pet names (baby, sugar, nasty). NO USE OF Y/N. 
You've put Ghostface behind you, at least in terms of fearing for your life. He's finally left you alone. He must be too humiliated to face you after you restrained him and had your way with him in the car while he was passed out. You still look at the picture you took every day.  You'd like to get it printed and stick it on your bathroom mirror.  He looks so pathetic with his own mess all over his robe. But it's not just the humiliation you love to see. It's his cock. . .
Yeah, his cock.  You've thought about it more than a few times. He would've given you every inch. All you had to do was ask. And the video of him whimpering? You save that for special occasions. Like when you need to cum in a hurry. 
It's Friday night and you're lying in bed after getting home from seeing a movie.  You make sure your vibrator is charged before you start reading, but soon enough you get distracted.  You're looking at your video of Ghostface coming all over himself when a call pops up on the screen. No ringtone.  Your phone is still on silent from the theater.  
The restricted number still makes your heart jump even after such an empowering victory. But you rip the bandaid off and answer it on the first ring. "Hello?"
"So... how'd you like the movie?" the voice changer asks you. 
You panic and hang up, but when he calls right back, you answer again. "This isn't funny, whoever you are."
"You know it's me, baby. You feel it in your. . . pants."
"What do you want?"
"I asked how you liked the movie." 
Friday night. Lucky guess. You know he’s not going to let it go, so you might as well answer. You’re not going to give him the satisfaction of acting aghast that he knows what you did tonight.  "Fine, I liked it. It was fun,” you say dismissively. 
"Picked a bad time to refill your drink. . .  Missed a great kill."
Your heart jumps. ". . .you were there?" The theater wasn't even that crowded. How could he go undetected? Surely you would have recognized something about a man you rode into oblivion. 
He's bemused. "What, you thought I was gone? Nowhere?”
"wishful thinking," you reply. 
Ghostface says, “Oh, we both know what you really wish for. . .”
You’re not even going to argue. 
“How was your date?" 
"How was yours with your hand?" You retort.
"You didn't look interested.” 
"What, are you gonna ask me out?" Your face heats up as you hear your own words.
"Not tonight. 'Cause you've got a date with that toy and my picture, don't ya?”
You freeze. 
He taunts, "Want a third wheel?"
You ask, "How long have you been watching me?"
"Never stopped, sugar." You feel like a fool for thinking he had. “I’ve just been a little. . . distracted.” 
You scoff. 
". . . Okay, did you call just to talk?"
"Wanted some audio with my visual this time."
"Pervert."
“oh I'm the pervert," he chides. Your face is burning up.
"You know, you’ve still got something of mine.”  His knife. You’ve hid it somewhere special.  “Keep comin’ for it. . .but don’t wanna interrupt you.”  
You look out your window, which faces the woods.  "Cause you put on a good show, baby." There’s never been a reason to close the curtains.  You preferred to see danger coming. Danger like him. A lot of good that’s done you. 
“You’re a creature of habit, aren’t you?” 
Are you that predictable?  
“Lucky for me,” he adds darkly.  His breathing becomes audible.  “Oh, you like this, don't you . . . knew ya would. . .  .  .Dripping already.” His voice is steady through the equalizer, but his speech pattern tells you his dick is hard. And god damn if he isn’t turning you on. 
“Dip a finger and show daddy how wet you are.” 
Before you know it, you're doing it. You don’t show him, but you curiously dip you fingers and pull apart the clear string of of your arousal
“Two fingers . . let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”  You lie there clenching your thighs together. 
“Ah, fuck it. Go ahead, turn it on,” he says but you don’t move. You clench your thighs together.  “Turn it on,” he repeats firmer, and something possesses you to turn your vibrator on. 
“Yeah, that’s it . . .”
You don’t even need the picture now, or the video, or your reading. But you don’t exactly want to let him make you come this fast. 
He sighs and says, “You’ve got a nice, juicy pussy." He spits, which the voice changer doesn’t process.
You close your eyes and recall what it felt like impaling yourself on his cock. 
"You don't have to say it," he reassures you menacingly. "I know I’ve got a nice cock.” 
He’s right about that.  You close your eyes as you touch yourself.  You’re too horny to think straight, but in the back of your mind, you try to tell yourself he killed your friends. He killed your friends. It doesn’t make you any less turned on. You sigh in shame at yourself. How does Ghostface have you wrapped around his finger?
“Oh, it’s only natural, baby. This cock’ll fuck you right up.” God, why does that turn you on? “In the guts and the head.” 
"Real shame I wasn’t awake.” He breathes heavily for a few seconds. "Coulda been even better for you.” 
You fail to suppress a moan as heat is bubbling in your core. 
“Yeah. . .Can’t stop thinkin' about this cock, can ya?” 
You turn up the intensity of your vibe. 
“Not everyday someone takes every inch of this.” He moans weakly then spits again. “Filthy girl.  Swallowed it right up.” 
“So tell me, sugar," his breathing is even heavier now. "How do you want it?”
“What if i don’t” you lie, then gasp at the tension in your core.
“Then why’d you take it,” he says with a bite and the heavy breathing stops. 
“Because,” you pant. “It was there.”
You’re getting close.  “How do you want me,” you self-loathingly ask. He doesn’t answer. You look at your phone and he’s gone. Shit. You open the video you took of him and as soon as you hear him whimper, your body jerks as the tension bursts inside you. As soon as you finish pulsing, the regret hits you like a tidal wave. So fucked up. Soooo disgusting.  You need a shower. 
—---
You take a long, hot shower, listening to music. You sigh, feeling a little better already. You turn off the water.
“Soaking wet. That’s how I want you.” You freeze and the only sound is the dripping water for a few seconds while the song changes.  
“Come on, you’re smarter than this.” The voice changer echoes through your bathroom and you almost fall over. “What’s next? Going down to the basement?”
You stand silently in the shower with your heartbeat echoing in your ears.  There’s nothing you can do.  You squat down, hugging your knees.  There’s no good option.   
The shower curtain slowly draws open and he looms above you.
“My turn, baby."  The glint of a knife–your own kitchen knife–catches your eye. He tilts his head slightly and observes you for a moment.  Then he pulls your hair and violently forces you to your feet. You begin to slip and he catches you, then manhandles you out of the tub and you whimper. You’re thrashing around wet and naked.  He drags you to the bathroom sink and puts you between him and the sink, both of you facing the mirror. He reaches out and wipes the mirror with his robe to make sure you can see. 
The sight is surreal. You’re completely nude with Ghostface up against you.  One gloved hand cups your breast while the other raises the knife.  He stays behind you and holds your own kitchen knife to your throat.  
He inhales audibly. “So clean and so filthy.”  
You elbow him in the gut. “Let go of me.” 
“Afraid not, baby. . .” The hand leaves your breast and slides lower.  He presses on your hip, bringing you tight against him. “Too late now.” His hips push forward and the massive shape of his hard cock makes you weak. 
He holds you still with just one of his big arms as you struggle.  “Coulda had it how ya wanted.” 
The unwelcome throb between your legs is spreading through your abdomen. 
“Now you’re gonna take it right here.”  He keeps you pinned to the counter, the arm with the knife holding you still while he lifts his robe and tugs his PJ pants down.  “You’ve put me behind you after all.”  He jerks you back against him, pulling you off the counter and holding you tight against his hard dick.  He lightly trails the tip of the knife down your cleavage and your stomach, dipping into your belly button on its way down to your mound. Then he holds it handle-up and teases your cunt with the flat of the knife as you watch in the mirror. The cold metal sends a shiver down your spine and you watch your nipples harden.
“Who are you?”
“Your favorite bad guy. Ask me a. . . harder one.” He grinds himself against you.
“What do you want?”
“To know what your insides feel like.” You suck in a deep breath and register the smell of weed as his cock twitches against your bare skin. “When I’m awake,” he adds. 
He pries your legs apart with his knee, then his glove brushes your inner thighs as he aligns his cock at your entrance. “Oh you’re ready ready,” he says. He notches himself with the thick head of his cock resting snug against your wet little hole, then he holds you tight and shoves himself into you with a sigh.  You have to try not to moan with the most welcome stretch. “Hell yeah,” the mask says into your ear. Thank God you’re so wet, because there is a lot of him. He pulls back, then slams into you, bottoming out with a grunt then another sigh. You watch your face in the mirror and try to wipe the enjoyment off it. 
The hand with the knife rests against your chest as he pounds you. “You’re lucky you’re so hot.” You want to memorize the feeling of his cock inside you so you can come to it later instead of giving him the satisfaction right now.  He pants as he thrusts into you harder.  “So. . .damn. . . hot.” You look down watching your breasts jiggle as he rails you. “I don’t think so. . . baby.” He grabs your chin and makes you look back up at the mirror. Your drooping eyelids give away how good you feel. 
“Take it like a bad girl.” He grunts and brutally fucks you in the way you’re afraid only he can. No, no, you shouldn’t be thinking thoughts like this. “A real bad girl.” A climax is gathering in your lower belly.  “Cock hungry little slut,” he bites and it makes you twitch. “This pussy’s mine now, you know.” 
He buries himself inside you for another minute and makes it rough. “Now or never baby," he pants. “Know you wanna come on this cock.” God, you do. “Do it now.”  He slams into you harder than ever and groans as he begins to pulse inside you.  You can’t stop it. The feeling of his climax trips you into your own.  Your needy cunt chokes his cock, milking him of an unfathomable load.  He fucks you through it and your body jerks into his imposing, robed form. His cum is in every crevice of your core.  You can’t help but moan and sigh.
“Good girl,” he says.
His cock slides out of you, leaving a void that slowly caves in on itself. He tucks it back into his pants. 
------
Ghostface forcibly positions your chin to take one last look in the mirror. Then he picks up your phone from the counter and forces you to swipe the camera on.  He points it at the mirror and says, “say cheese.” He tosses your phone back on the counter, then slams you chest-first into the back of the door with an impact. He holds the knife to the side of your neck and says, “you’re welcome.” He really smells like weed.
“Now where’s my knife.”
“I don’t have it,” you claim. 
“I don’t believe you.” 
“What’s so special about it?”
“It’s mine.” 
“The cops have it.” 
“No they don’t. Why are you lying?”
You’re not really sure. He presses the flat of the knife so hard against your throat you start to choke. “Okay,” you manage hoarsely. He lets you breathe.  You look behind him toward the toilet. 
He drags you by the elbow to the toilet. He opens the back of it and the knife is wrapped up in a grocery bag. “You watch too many movies,” he says. He pushes you out of the way, opens the door, and leaves. The song turns to Call Me by Blondie.
NEXT: PART 3
--------------------------
Please engage (reblog/comment)  if you want more of this <333 It might go a long way in motivation.
Yes this is my night walks coded ghostface but I think most people reading this don't know what night walks is lol.
Call Me:This Blog::Red Right Hand:Canon. But in this case it especially makes sense 🥹
@hearteyed-shawty had a song rec last time: I'm Yours by Isabel Derosa.
Slasher master list
@ghostslittlegf @sunflowerleii @igotmajordaddyissues @rileyquinn07
8K notes · View notes
finniestoncrane · 1 month
Note
Virginal vault dweller reader you say?? I'd eat that up (and so would Cooper, heh) but seriously I would read the hell out of that if you're up for it <3
Different Up Here
Cooper Howard x Fem!Reader, word count: 6.3k anon thank you lmao i had already started drafting this, so vault dweller reader isn't quite a virgin but they are definitely inexperienced and have never known pleasure like the kind that cooper can offer 🤎 request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi • masterlist minors DNI!! 🔞 cw: power imbalance, dubious consent because once you've said yes to cooper you can't change your mind, overstimulation, crying, oral sex, fingering, instructional, full penetration babiessss i realised i never tag that shit but yeah it's in here lmao, cumming inside, no protection, sweet coop afterwards but only briefly
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If anyone else had asked you in that moment how you were, you couldn't have answered accurately without any hint of sarcasm and irritation. You were being worn down, like buildings by the sands of the desert. Each little molecule of your optimism being torn away from you, painful like plucking a hair. But when Cooper asked you, you tried your best to push down your knee jerk response.
"Let's see, shall we? Since leaving the vault a month ago, bravely in search of resources and supplies for my friends, I have killed, maimed, and eaten things I hope to never think of again. I'm in a constant cycle of very, very stressed and then very, very bored where there is no happy medium between fearing for my life and wishing for death. And oh, by the way, I'm sweating buckets the whole time because it's deathly fucking warm. Thank you for asking, Cooper!"
Instead, you shrugged and offered him at least a partial truth.
"It sounds silly... but I'm kind of bored."
A dry chuckle passed over Cooper's lips.
"Heh, that's a new one for out here."
Sensing an opportunity to at least get some conversation out of him, you sat up on the rusty bed frame, your body sinking into the almost entirely flattened mattress as you crossed your legs and did your best to get Cooper to talk more than a sentence at a time.
"Really? I would have thought you'd be bored a lot, especially when there's no raiders, or mirelurks, or scavengers, or feral ghouls, or super mutants, or roving gangs of-"
"See, this is why I'm never bored. Always somethin' or someone to be killin'."
"But what about like... now? When there's nothing else to do. There's no magazines, no books, no TV."
You watched as Cooper turned from you with a slight smile. You knew the one, the familiar grin that meant you'd divulged some information about your life in the vaults, something he always found so amusing. It was your naivety, your optimism. He was endlessly fascinated by it, as though listening to you talk about it reminded him of something he had before.
That fascinated you. It made you want to stay around him, the way he listened silently as you talked about the old films that were on the holotapes, the food that was still fresh and available, the music you could hear whenever you wanted to, not reliant on some two-bit radio host. He paid attention to you. And any time his deep, brown eyes focused on your lips it made your heart flutter in an admittedly unexpected manner.
Remembering that feeling, you tried again, hoping that your next approach might be something that interested him a little more than just conversation.
"You know how we used to pass time in the vaults?"
Over the sound of the evening breezes that whipped up the sand you could still hear Cooper sigh before he spoke.
"Now if you tell me that you wanna go out there again tonight to find an old blast radius board... well I am just going to have to shoot you."
You laughed at what you hoped was a joke and waved him off, despite the fact that he was still turned away from you, unable to see your gesture as he tried ignoring you in what you assumed was the hope that you might shut up and leave him alone.
"No, no no no no no. Just..."
The lump in your throat felt like it was about to choke you, so you swallowed the clump of nerves quietly, your voice trembling as you finished your sentence.
"... fooling around... y'know?"
Cooper turned to face you. You had piqued his interest, and you couldn't help but show the giddy glee on your face, the smallest smile crossing your lips as your eyes widened. But his words wiped away all hope that you had garnered in that short span of time.
"Oh... oh darlin'."
He laughed a little, each little sound of the short, sharp giggle like a slap to the face.
"I don't think you're ready for that at all."
You raised an eyebrow, defiant, irritated, and keen to know how he thought he had you pegged so quickly. You'd never talked about anything like that with him before. Was he assuming that you were a virgin based on how you behaved around him alone? Maybe he figured that the lack of flirting on your part was down to a complete lack of experience, when in reality, it was because every flirtatious quip he threw your way made you so nervous and flustered you felt like you might throw up.
"How come I'm not ready? I mean, I've... I've done stuff... I've done it!"
"The fat you're not saying it how it is makes me think that you are absolut-"
"I've had sex, Cooper. I've fucked before. I've been fucked."
Blinking off the irritation at being interrupted by you, Cooper pushed up the brim of his hat and stared directly at you, as though he was examining your, to see if you would stand up for yourself any further.
"By who? One of your little buddies underground? Fucking like little bunnies? I don't think that qualifies you, sweetheart."
"Why? Sex is sex..."
You said it with such confidence. As if you really knew. As if you hadn't spent your teenage years practising on your hand, holding a pillow close, lining up for that one girl in the vault who would sell practice kisses for extra bubble-gum. You'd had sex before, of course. You weren't a liar. Just because you'd only ever done it once didn't render it nonfactual. Just because it had only lasted for all of four minutes. Just because you weren't sure you even orgasmed, and your friend had told you that you'd know if you'd orgasmed. Just because it was all over so quickly, and he'd run off before anyone could catch you both, avoiding you at every opportunity after that.
"... Isn't it?"
"Oh no it ain't. Besides, like I keep telling you, it's different up here. Everything's different up here. And that includes fuckin'."
The way he said the word, consonants enunciated with such grit and vigour, filled your stomach with knots that began to tighten as you considered in what way things were so different.
"What exactly do you mean by that?"
Cooper sighed, exasperated, resigning himself to the fact that you were going to keep talking to him regardless of his short replies and attempts to end the conversation.
"You are a dog with a bone, huh? Ain't gonna let it go."
His yellowed teeth were exposed as his lips pulled back in a baring, mischievous smile. Those knots doubled, the ends being pulled by tension in your nervous system as Cooper's smirk put you into a dazed stupor.
"No, sir."
"Now, I don't remember signing on to be your personal tutor in all things apocalypse. Do I really need to show you how everything works up here?"
As your cheeks began to blush, you nodded enthusiastically.
"Yes, sir."
You were hopeful for just a bit of a distraction. Something to help take the stress away. To relieve the tension that had been building up between you and Cooper as of late. You'd been studying him, watching the way he looked at you, fascinated by your perceived, and frankly obvious, innocence. The way his fingers moved, contributing to the skilful way he handled his gun and his ropes. The confidence, the charisma, the charms.
You wanted him, but you weren't quite sure how to broach the situation without it seeming desperate. But you were past that now. You were desperate For anything, just something. Something to cure the monotony of walking and hiding and fighting and surviving. You didn't want to just survive. You wanted to at least find a semblance of fun and pleasure in this nightmare you had found yourself in. And in the vaults, when board games and books and debates got boring, there was always fucking. That was what you desired most right now. The fact that Cooper happened to be the closest target for your desires was just a sweet miracle, or a cruel tease depending on how willing he was.
And luckily, he seemed agreeable.
"Well then, how about you come over here and let ol' Coop show you a little thing or two about how dirty you can really get up here in the mean, dusty Wasteland, hm?"
Your excitement was palpable, even though you were trying to keep your composure. There was no escaping the echo of the giddy squeal you let out as you jumped up from the bed and made your way over to Cooper. He waited in the far corner of the room, setting himself down on an old armchair as you stepped towards him, slapping his thighs as an indication of where he wanted you. And you did as you were told, following his instructions, knowing they hadn't led you astray so far in your time together.
It felt awkward at first, being so close to him. You shifted your weight nervously, trying to get comfortable while making sure Cooper was still at ease, which of course, he was. He always was. Nothing stirred him, he was forever at peace. Competent in any situation. Quick to adapt. And as you fidgeted and fussed, you felt his strong hands pushing you forward on his lap, until your chests were practically pressed together, his hands skirting over your lower back as he held you still. In command. In control. The sudden sensation of his hands on your body made your breath hitch, a soft, surprised squeal on the inhale that had Cooper raising his brow at you.
"Now... you agree that you asked for this, alright? Because I am not going to put my effort into entertaining your little whims if you're gonna get fussy and decide it's too much for you. I did warn you."
"Yes, you did, and I really don't think you needed to. I doubt there's too much different about it, and I've picked up what I needed to know pretty quickly from your other lessons, haven't I?"
Your retaliation to his insistence that you needed him to teach you everything, and that some things just might prove themselves a little too hard even for your levels of enthusiasm, had irritated him when he'd first met you. But now your optimism and sheer refusal to believe anything was too much for you were a source of entertainment for him. A challenge.
"That's fine then, darlin'. But I'll remember that."
His eyes bore into your soul, keeping your focus on him as he dared you to look away. They sparkled as he ran his tongue over his lips, the pretence of preparing for his next words covering the obvious flirtation in the way he dragged the flat muscle along his chapped skin.
"So, gimme a benchmark here, lil lady. How much foreplay was involved in your previous encounters? I'd hate to leave you high and dry."
"Foreplay...? What... uh, what is that?"
Cooper sighed, rolling his eyes before closing his eyelids over gently.
"Well, it's something like this."
He pushed a loose strand of hair back behind your ear, rough fingers following the curve and grazing over your neck as he let them drift down the front of your chest, tickling the exposed skin as far as your jumpsuit would allow before he took a hold of the zip at the front. A quick flit of his eyes up to you seemed to ask for permission, and your small, almost imperceptible nod, told him to keep going.
Slowly, painfully so, he pulled the zip down, watching as the centre of your torso was slowly revealed to him. Smooth skin, in comparison to his anyway, clear of any unnatural blemishes or war wounds. One calloused digit followed down your sternum to your stomach and back up, hooking under the left side of the fabric and pulling it over, then the other, exposing the top half of your body to him.
Cooper traced his fingertips over the top of your breasts, watching as your chest moved in and out, slowly, but exaggeratedly. The knots in your stomach felt like they might burst with the tension as his sharp, ragged nails crossed over your hardening nipples, a gentle tingle coursing through your veins.
"Well?"
"No... n-nothing like that... just grabbing..."
"Oh yeah? You like that? How about this?"
He closed two fingers around your nipple, one hand still on your back to keep you balanced as your body reacted to his touch. Between the two digits, you felt your nipples heating up, the slight, burning pain from the way he squeezed them sending a signal down your spine that seemed to affect every part of you. Tighter, tighter, and then as your eyes closed a little more, eyelids pressed tight, he would ease up to offer some relief.
"You like that? Like it rough?"
"I think... I think I like both."
"So, something like this?"
He teased your nipples once more, pressing harder with his fingertips, pulling them out and jiggling your breasts as he tugged at them, this lewder act interspersed with a gentle caress as he held your breast against the palm of his hand, carefully cupping it as he flicked his thumb over the sensitive and completely erect nipple.
You bit your lip, trying to keep quiet, Coop's hand moved swiftly from your body to your cheeks, popping the lip back out as he pressed his thumb and forefinger into your face. Understanding the message, and seemingly showing this in your wide-eyed gaze, he let his rough, leathery hand make its way back down to your breast, cupping it once more as he spoke.
"Different, see? Pleasure is hard to come by out here. You gotta do it right when you've got the chance."
Cooper leaned into your neck, whispering the words low and slowly, his dry, chapped lips skimming over your skin as he continued.
"I bet down there they didn't know the first thing about real pleasure. Takes time, something like that. You gotta learn the body, gotta make it feel good."
His teeth grazed over your shoulder and back up along your neck before he pulled back, watching your eyes refocus from the haze of arousal.
"Did they make you feel good?"
"No."
You were confident in that statement. It hadn't felt good. It felt rushed. Clumsy. Shameful. And as you pondered it, your mouth remained open in a slight pout which trembled as Cooper asked his next question.
"And what about your pretty lips... did they kiss them?"
"A little..."
Cooper leaned in, his rough lips pressing onto yours with firm contact, his tongue staying in place as though he imagined that might be a bit too much for you right now. But that same level of restraint didn't keep him from letting his teeth catch onto your bottom lip, pulling it out, only letting go when you winced in surprise as the suddenness of the action.
"Didn't bite them either. Of course not, what am I thinking? That would be a little too adventurous for your kind."
His face took on a darker tone as he smiled knowingly towards you.
“And what about these pretty lips?”
Before you could piece together the question, his hand was diving into your jumpsuit, pushing down the front and past the waist, stroking against the front of your underwear which, by now, was soaking wet with your arousal.
“They touch these lips, huh?”
You gasped as he pushed your underwear to the side, stroking his fingers along your slick, plump pussy lips, withdrawing them soon after to taste you on his tongue, the way you had watched him taste the blood of enemies, the blood of victims.
“Stand up, darlin’… Why don’t you take that suit off, hm? Get yourself comfy.”
As you raised yourself up from his hips, your legs wobbled under you, not quite steady enough to support you so soon after being reduced to jelly by Cooper’s touch, his caramelised words that filled your ears, the sharp twang of his accent, the delicate cadence, the power rumbling underneath like an almost silent bassline.
“Do it slowly though.”
Cooper watched carefully as you stood nervously before him, shuffling out of your suit, stripping for him, your hips moving from side to side slow and steady, unintentionally sultry in the way you moved. Without taking his eyes from you he reached for his canteen, taking a long sip from it as you let your suit fall down over your legs, stepping out of it and pushing it to the side with your feet.
“That’s it, darlin’. Can’t do this half-hearted. I need to have access to all of you there. Now come sit back down.”
You held your arms in front of you, feeling far too exposed for the shelter you’d found for the evening. No windows, no locks on the doors. But it was difficult to focus on that worry for too long as you watched Cooper’s tongue flit back out over his lips, clear strands of drool sparkling in the light as he took you in, hungrily, dreamily.
“Turn around though. You face that way.”
The metal buttons on the front of his duster coat were cold against the skin of your back, but you leaned into them anyway. Cooper’s hand curved around your neck and up under your chin, holding your face forward.
“You keep an eye out, holler if you see anything coming. I’ll do everything else.”
A faint clicking sound, the safety on his gun being flicked to off, before those same fingers draped over your mound and down on to your lips, spreading them apart, the cool air of the decrepit room cooling the heat of your hot, aching cunt. With two fingers holding your lips apart, he let the middle digit tap against your clit, each tiny sensation turning your blood cold before heating it exponentially, a cold sweat beginning to form on your brow as you felt a tingle in your abdomen.
The finger that tapped the sensitive bud began stroking it from side to side, laying flat against it length wise as Cooper strummed your body, still holding your chin in his hands, smiling to himself every time your back arched away from him in intense pleasure. Every nerve-ending was at his mercy. He was right, it was different up here. But you wondered how much of that was the Wasteland and it’s effect on sexuality and pleasure, and how much of it was just him. Cooper Howard, Wasteland bounty hunter, a past life he refused to talk about, the most charismatic monster you had ever met. His fingers, daintily crossing over your clit, as you felt his breath, silent except for an occasional hum of satisfaction in the form of a long moan. Maybe it was just Cooper who was different.
It was hard to focus on this new line of though as his hard fingertips clamped down on your clit, pinching it as he rolled it between his fingers. Even harder when he let his hand drop from your neck and instead began teasing at your nipples once more. Soft, cruel flicks over the hardened bumps, his fingers at work on your body, his lips kissing at the back of your neck. Moans growing louder, more frequent, as he let himself enjoy the act of making you squirm. You could tell he was having fun, as you rolled your hips back a little, feeling the thick bulge of his stiffening cock against your rear. You wondered how it might feel, how it might look, and what he could do differently with it.
“Cooper… Coop… I think I’m going to cum…”
His movements quickened, cock twitching against your body as he pinched tighter and pressed his fingers harder against your cunt.
“Don’t you dare, little lady.”
“Ok I’ll… I’ll try but… you have to… stop… please stop… Coop…”
He ignored your please, the whining, desperate begging as you tried to stop your body from the natural, encouraged reaction.
“Have some self-control, sweetheart.”
“Cooper, I really can’t… please… please stop touching me…”
“I absolutely will not.”
Your fingers dug into his thighs, but you noticed that you refused to move away from him. You wanted to do as he asked, wanted to hold yourself back from the brink of orgasm to prolong his touch, but you couldn’t risk him actually stopping, fearing that your body might crumble if his fingers left your quivering, pathetic body for only a second.
Each stroke against your increasingly wet and sensitive pussy had you trembling and shaking, and Cooper had to remove his hand from your breast to keep you steady, placing it under your chin and holding you steady by the neck.
“I am warning you, missy.”
“Cooper… I can’t stop…”
You shuddered and whined as your body gave in to the temptation, feeling a rush of heat and relief as you came on his lap, your arousal coating his pants, adding to the collection of stains and wear on them. But he didn’t stop then.
“No wait… seriously, Cooper… I can’t… I can’t take much more, honestly…”
“Listen, I told you. I said you better not cum. I wasn’t done with you yet.”
Your eyes began to sting with tears of exasperation as your body kept on pushing to its limits, conjuring up another wave of climax, tormenting you with never-ending bouts of arousal that kept you rutting against him, despite how painful it was to keep writhing into his body. You could feel your stomach knotting again, not much time between each orgasm to relax, and you dug your hands into his thighs, pushing your body up off of him as you tensed completely.
“Ok, this time, you do it on my command. You do it when I say you can, alright?”
“Cooper…”
“Don’t give me that pleading shit, you asked me to show you how things are done. Well this is how Cooper fuckin’ Howard does things. So are you ready? You gonna come for me?”
“C-coop… I’ll… I’ll try…”
“Good girl, now you keep that mouth making those whines and moans. I don’t need you to call out my name or anything, I know I’m all you’re thinking about.”
The praise, the self-confidence, the way his fingers seemed to be pulling your orgasm out, motioning for it to come closer to him.
“Come on, darlin’, come on…”
Your vision blurred as the climax came over you, body rolling and convulsing as you came once more at Cooper’s insistence, your cheeks stained with tears, salted water rolling through the layers of grime and clearing paths to your chin.
As you settled back down onto his lap with a shudder, you felt Cooper’s fingers stroking through your hair. He was surprisingly gentle, oddly calm, but you supposed that you deserved his kindness as you had done as he had asked, making up for your previous indiscretion. He was almost cooing, shushing you as you found your breath, establishing your sense of self once more after the overstimulating orgasm that shook your core.
“You seen enough of the big bad world for one day then?”
You probably had, but you still found yourself shaking your head, ignoring the way your body reacted with a violent twitch at the notion of Cooper’s hands delivering intense pleasure.
“A glutton for punishment, hm? Or just keen to learn?”
As you pondered your answer, Cooper seemed to have come to the conclusion for you, as he tapped your hips and began to shift underneath you.
“Alright then, get onto your knees.”
Positioning yourself at his feet, you couldn’t help but look up at him, catching his eyes as he looked down at you with that unique brand of disdain and intrigue he had somehow mastered. You knew what was coming, what was about to happen, and your mouth began watering at the thought. What he might taste like. What he might look like.
You didn’t have to imagine for long though, as you could see his fingers working the belt of his pants, loosening it, unzipping his fly, and gripping his semi-erect cock at the base as he took it out, brandishing it. He kept close attention on your own eyes, a soft sigh of relief imperceptibly escaping his chest as he noticed your pupils widen, your mouth opening in preparation for him.
It was exactly as you had expected. The texture of the shaft was similar to that of his cheeks and his forearms, a similar colouring, though darker at the base and on the shaft which was tinted red. Thick, purple tinged veins covered it, winding around the length, cutting across the ridges of the scars.
“You can come closer, darlin’. I don’t know what they told you about mutations and radiation effects down there in your little utopia, but I can assure you… it doesn’t bite.”
The fear was palpable, clearly, but it was nothing to do with Cooper’s body and everything to do with your lack of experience, which, despite you arguing otherwise, was becoming plainly obvious even to you. You had only ever touched a cock with your hands outside of being quickly fucked. Several times you’d been cajoled into quickly stroking an erection under the blankets before your partner ran off to the bathroom, clean and tidy, flushing away the sins. And you were very well aware that there was always the option to suck on one, but it had never presented itself. It had never seemed that appealing to you. Until you were faced with Cooper’s.
He hadn’t even asked you to do either yet, but you found yourself curious, salivating over the thought of him, mind racing as you imagined how he might feel against your tongue.
“Can I taste it… you?”
Cooper smiled warmly, one of the few times you had seen him look at you with genuine pride.
“Now that is using your initiative. Of course you can.”
You kept your hands to yourself as you leaned in towards his body, content to let Cooper wield his length at you, his hand firm around the base as you inched closer, tongue pressed out over your lips. A strand of drool collected and spilled forward, hitting the floor in a soft patter just before the tip of your tongue came into contact with the tip of his cock.
A lot of the movements were instinctual, following your desires more than what you thought might be protocol as you dragged your tongue up the shaft and swirled over the blushing head of his cock. It tasted bitter, but in a pleasant way.  Savoury, not sweet. Salted, a tang that stayed there for a few seconds after your tongue had moved on to another spot. A flavour you found yourself craving now.
Cooper gripped tighter and pushed forward, taking you by surprise as he slid himself into your mouth, his free hand moving to the back of your head, fingers curling into your hair. As the taste of him hit the back of your tongue, cock almost touching your throat, you coughed and spluttered a little.
“Fuck me, darlin’… do you need me to show you how to do this too?”
He looked down at you, filled with pity as he saw your face. Red cheeks, puffed out, lips stretched over the girth of his cock, tears welling up in your eyes as you struggled to breathe.
“Breath through your nose… breathe in…”
You followed his instructions, instantly calmed when you found your lungs filling with air once more. Almost immediately back to enjoying yourself, the feeling of Cooper inside of you, the control he had as he held your head against him.
“Now… you don’t want to choke too much, so keep your tongue flat… yeah, just like that…”
It was so much easier like that, and you could feel your cheeks getting warmer and redder as you realised that not only had you embarrassed yourself with your spluttering and lack of knowledge, but that Cooper had clearly done this a lot.
“And your teeth… well, usually they’ll tell you to keep ‘em outta the way, but you know me… gotta be different…”
Taking the hint, you let your jaw close slightly, the pain of the stretch lessened, your teeth scraping along the top of his shaft as your tongue worked the underneath, sucking and rolling as much as you could while keeping it flat.
He didn’t say much else, and you couldn’t tell if he was particularly enjoying himself. It worried you, the fact that he had specific preferences, the way it was so clear how much more experienced he was than you. How many others had there been? And were they all better than you? As your mind wandered to your anxieties, you completely missed the fact that you had begun to drool all over yourself until Cooper relaxed his grip on your head and wiped at your chin with his thumb. Catching your eyes and sensing some of your worries, he was surprisingly quick to soothe you.
“You can swallow or spit or let it all spill out, I don’t mind makin’ a mess darlin’. But whatever you’re doing, you keep that up.”
You were so pathetically grateful for the encouragement, for the tiniest semblance of praise, that you felt yourself moaning involuntarily. The soothing motion of sucking on his cock, the taste of something new, the comforting knowledge that he was happy with your efforts. You could feel your clit throbbing, aroused by Cooper’s satisfaction, how pleased he was with the way you worked him over.
Which is why it surprised you so much when he pulled his cock from your mouth, your lips slipping off of it with a disgustingly lewd popping sound, drool spilling onto your chin in long strands which stretched from your lips to his cock and tore apart as he distanced himself from you.
And again, that sympathetic gaze, the way he could tell what you were thinking before you even said it.
“Oh, don’t you look at me with those big, sad eyes. You got nothin’ to worry about, sweetheart. That was good, ‘specially for a first try…”
He winked to you as he spoke, causing your heart to skip enough beats that you thought you might die there and then.
“… It’s just that I’m all slicked up and ready to go now… so you wanna bend over for me? Or do you wanna come sit on my lap?”
“Uh… lap, please… I was kinda bent over for the last… first time.”
“Well, you come and take a seat then, darlin’, let ol’ Coop show you something new.”
You nervously settled your entirely nude body back down onto his thighs. Cooper’s hands were gentle against your shoulders as he pulled you backwards with him, leaning at a slight angle in the chair, his cock rigid and firm as it sat against your waiting cunt, coated in your drool which almost seemed to shimmer with the dancing light of the fire.
Then, so carefully, so gently, far more than you’d ever seen him be before, Cooper took hold of his cock at the base and slid it inside of you, one hand on your stomach as he braced you, keeping your body steady as he inserted himself further and further between your clenching walls.
“Bigger than before?”
You nodded, biting your lip as you felt the distinct stretch, his rough, textured cock forcing its way inside your cunt, pressed up to the hilt, testing your limits.
“Better?”
“Mhm…”
“Speak up, darlin’.”
With your voice strained and breathy, you managed to form some words.
“Yes… it’s better.”
“That’s it, good girl. Now, I’m gonna buck my hips, ok? You just try and keep your balance.”
Below you, Cooper shifted a little, his hips rolling backwards, inches of his cock escaping your tight, aching cunt, before he rolled them forwards and upwards, back into you. A slow, steady pace that he focused on keeping until you felt warmer, more relaxed.
“You got this, it’s like riding a horse.”
“I’ve never… hm… ridden a horse…”
Cooper chuckled, a low and rasping sound that sent shivers over your skin and seemed close enough to you that it was coming from inside of your body.
“Never ridden a ghoul before either, but you’re handling it alright for a first timer.”
You were coping ok, you had to admit, but you could feel your stomach muscles tensing, the knots back in full force as they tensed and tightened, loosened and frayed with each pump of his cock within you.
“Ah… Cooper…”
“Too much, darlin’? Does it hurt?”
There was a sense of genuine care in his tone, as though he had taken it upon himself to show you that yes, things were different up there in the Wasteland, but that didn’t always mean they were worse. Some things were good, if not a little bit difficult to take at first.
“A little…”
Cooper tilted your chin up, forcing your head to lean back completely against his shoulder. In a delicate move, one far more romantic than you imagined from him, he ran his thumb over your lips, angling his neck to look at them, his own mouth open ever so slightly, a monotonous panting as he kept his hips moving, increasing the speed and the force at which he entered you.
His eyes flicked up suddenly, looking into yours, catching your gaze and holding unblinking eye contact as he spoke.
“I know… I know… Just a little longer, though…”
He closed his eyes, focusing on the feeling of his cock pushing against your body, enveloped in your hot, wet, velvety interior.
“I know it hurts… but I ain’t stopping, so don’t even ask… here…”
You watched as he brought a finger to your lips, offering it up to you.
“…you bite down on that if it gets too much, ok… but don’t hold back on those sweet sounds… I wanna hear you scream.”
With that vaguely threatening remark, he thrust up into you, banging against your body, spurring on your orgasm but unleashing a dull ache that spread through every sensitive part of you.
“Won’t… be long… keep it together… good girl…  good girl…”
It felt good, the pain, the sting, the ache, the shivers. The fact that he was using you, finding pleasure in you. All of it culminating in Cooper’s nearing orgasm which you could sense was closing in on him. His movements were becoming more frantic, sloppier, and he was mouthing all manner of sweet nothings as he let his façade slip away.
And those soft mumbles opened up into a wide roar as he clung to your body, the hand on your neck cutting off the air to your lungs only briefly, one hand on your lap pressing sharp indents into your skin as he forced himself into you. The last few moments of his fevered thrusting, fucking you wildly, drool pooling in the corner of his mouth as he rutted into you in a dazed stupor before his body gave in. His cock throbbed, each pulse sending another rope of cum against your insides, filling you with his seed as he shuddered finally, slinking backwards into the chair and taking in a deep breath as you removed yourself from him.
You’d only managed to take a few steps forward before Cooper addressed you, opening his eyes to watch you standing there awkwardly, his cum dripping down your thighs, a warmth that quickly turned cool in the air of the room.
“Did I say you could get up?”
Panic settled in your chest, aware that you had waited until you felt his muscles relax, his body retreating from you, before you slid off his cock, expecting him to push you away anyway, like your first time. You assumed he was finished, and you weren’t sure you were ready for the idea that he might not be done with you.
“Are we… oh, Cooper, I really can’t take anymore.”
Even as you stood, you could feel your legs shaking, weakened by the intense orgasms, the way they tightened against his every movement.
“That’s different up here too then, I suppose.”
Cooper stood up from the chair, pacing towards you with a purposeful stride as he pushed his cock back into his pants, zipping them up as he reached you. You inhaled sharply as he placed his hand at the back of your head, those knots in your stomach beginning to form again, worried that a further, albeit pleasurable punishment was on the cards. But you were surprised as he slid his free hand around your back, tugging at your waist as he pulled you in close to him. A quick smile before his lips were on yours, the brim of his hat pushed upwards as he leaned into the kiss. Warm, gentle, the kind of kiss you’d seen in movies. Practised and confident, meaningful, sincere.
When he pulled back, your body following him a little before you settled back onto your feet, he smiled warmly.
“Sweet with the sour, darlin’. You gotta keep ‘em wanting more.”
“M-more?”
More as in now? Or more as in the idea that Cooper had enjoyed himself and would be willing to offer that kind of pleasure to you again. And he answered with a wink.
“Definitely. There’s a still a lot you’ve got to learn.”
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ghosts-cyphera · 8 months
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pornstar!ghost defo gets millions of views because of the way he makes his favourite costar cum on his cock🥴 i don't make the rules🤷🏻‍♀️
"oh, bloody hell."
ghost blew out a breath, his thumb moving to run across his lips. for the past hour his phone had been buzzing so loud in the metallic locker of the gym dressing-room that the front-desk assistant had eventually been forced to come ask him to turn it off.
yet not for a moment had he prepared for—for this.
whatever the fuck it was.
his social media was flooded. twitter, instagram, even his goddamn fucking tiktok account that his coworkers had forced him to create during a drunken night out a couple of weeks ago.
and it was all because of you.
well, because of the most recent video the two of you had shot together.
apparently it was—ghost's brows furrowed, as he read through the comments flooding his posts—relationship goals. apparently it was all that a girl could ever want. apparently the two of you were now... being shipped.
his fingers working fast, he looked up your name from his contacts and brought his phone to his ear. not two rings later you answered the call, a touch of amusement to your voice.
"you've seen it, haven't you?"
he could hear the laughter in your voice—the warmth of it making him feel more grounded as he shook his head. "fuckin' A, love. not sure I should be shitting my pants or feel fuckin' flattered. they're saying that we'll be—shipped."
"that we'll—" your laugh was bright. "oh, they're shipping us now, are they? no it's—they want us to be—together."
together?
"they've already seen me railing the shit out of you in front of—," ghost's words died down on his lips.
oh.
oh.
"well I'll be fuckin' damned." the widest of grins tugged at the corners of his lips as he nodded his head, slow. "all because of the way I fuck you, eh?"
"something about the way you look at me when you do." he could hear the smile on your lips as you spoke. "price is reworking next week's schedules to see if he can fit more of us in."
"weren't we already scheduled for—," ghost bit down the rest of his sentence.
"thursday, yeah. but apparently his golden couple takes priority. he's—oh, hold up."
the line fell quiet for a moment, and ghost allowed himself to wet his lips with the deepest chuckle. if he hadn't know himself any better, he would've thought that the sudden heat playing on his cheeks was brought there by you, and not by the workout he had just finished.
it was definitely from the workout.
"ghost?"
your warm call only brightened his smile, and he nodded his head. "yeah, darlin'?"
"I'll see you next week on—," you laughed, "four days."
four fuckin' days.
"alright," he managed out a chuckle. "yeah, alright. I'll—err—I'll see you then, yeah? tell price I said—" thank you. "tell him I said hi."
"I will," you hummed. "ghost?"
"yeah, love?"
"I'm looking forward to next week."
fuckin' hell.
he bit down his smile, for nothing. for there was nothing he could do to control the sudden flutter at the pit of his stomach: to hide the warmth of his voice as he nodded his head.
"me too, darlin'. me too.”
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a/n: this is not even smut anymore. this is just—it's just fluff. I'm falling for them so goddamn hard, lmao. / pornstar!ghost masterlist / my inbox is so, so open for all your thoughts about him. 💌
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murderandcoffee · 1 year
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erwinsvow · 1 month
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random but i can see rafe giving shy!reader like a large amount of “pocket money” and she’ll always wait until she’s fully broke and runs out (if she doesn’t have a job), she’d be so nervous to ask him for more.
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at first you're so shy around rafe you can't even find it in you to question what the money is for—you just assume it's some sort of test. you keep the cash in your pretty pink wallet until it's so full it won't fit in your purse.
rafe has no reason to be giving you money—you've got your own, your parents', that is. and suddenly you start to question everything, start overthinking like normal. does rafe think you're reliant on him for money? if so, is he mad at you because of it?
one day when he comes over to your place for once, claiming he wanted to get away from his noisy house to the serenity and peace of your bedroom, you dig out the wallet from under your bed and drop it next to him. he's laying on the mattress, sprawled out playing chess with a robot. the wallet lands with a thud.
like always, you let him speak first.
"what the hell's this?" he asks, lifting the thoroughly packed leather.
"i'm giving it back," you state, trying to remain a little firm. it's so hard around him though.
"jesus, kid," he comments, flicking through the cash. "did y'spend any of it? huh?"
"n-no," you stammer, suddenly nervous. "i kept it safe for you, like you wanted." you look at him with big, confused eyes and he looks back at you in disbelief.
"s'not for that, baby. it's for spending. for nice things, y'know, all the crap you like."
"crap?" you question back.
"stuff. books and records and ice cream when m'not around. y'know, pocket money."
"but i already have that," you reply. "did you think i didn't? did i ask for it?" suddenly confused, you wonder how you gave rafe this implication. "sorry, rafe."
"why are you apologizin'?" you perch yourself next to him.
"i guess because i didn't spend it.."
"well, stop. just use it for somethin' nice. for yourself, not me." he clarifies because he knows you—knows you'll go find him a new polo or golf glove if he didn't tell you otherwise.
and the way he says it—you comply, pressing a kiss to his cheek, mind floating to all the ways you could use it—a new beach read, a new bikini for boat days, ice cream nights with wheezie and a big tip for the nice girls who worked at the parlor.
you were used to spending your dad's money, now you were spending daddy's money. it wasn't that big of a change after all.
and it's really not.. until you run out.
you never had to ask your parents twice for anything, but rafe gives you cash and you don't question why, but now that you're used to getting things from rafe's money, you don't want to revert back. in all honestly, it felt nice when someone asked you where you got something from and you could tell them your favorite words.
"my boyfriend got it for me!"
credit cards are unlimited, but cash runs out. and asking rafe for more seems like the absolute worst thing in the world, especially when you were so hesitant to even start using it.
approaching the door to rafe's bedroom, you pace infront of it for a moment, thinking of the right words to say. ward walks by and smiles at you, though he's confused at what you're doing. panicked, you run in, standing in front of your boyfriend while he's looking at something on his desk. rafe glances up when you walk in.
"hey, kid."
"hi." it even comes out nervous. rafe shuts his laptop at the sound of your voice.
"what is it?" he asks, and you blink back in response.
"what's.. what?"
"y'think i can't tell when you're off? c'mon, start talkin'." you give in immediately.
"well... it's just, um, this cash. your cash. i ran out. and, um, this book i wanted releases out tomorrow. and i told wheezie i'd take her to the movies because that book we both like is a movie now, and it comes out this weekend, and y'know she's a child so-"
"yeah. m'aware."
"sorry," you reply, feeling your cheeks heat up. "sorry." he gets up from the desk, and you wonder if you really messed up by demanding so much.
"what'd i tell ya? stop apologizin'." when he gets close, rafe does what he always does, lifting your chin up so you're looking at him, his fingers resting on your jaw. "what'd you think? i'm gonna say no to you?"
"maybe. i'm being kinda greedy."
"nah, kid. be as greedy as you want." when you smile, he laughs at you, at how nervous you still get, how worried you are that you're doing something wrong. "besides, i got some ideas on how y'can make it up to me."
sounds like a win-win for you.
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