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#and i want to write more into the journal we keep
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dumping more of my stancest feels here because i cannot NOT think of them. i read journal 3 for the first time this week and its great because Ford acts like stanley's biggest hater which is pretty fking funny (if not absolutely infuriating at times because omfg stfu you smug prick)
but the moments like this get to me
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Ford being blinded by his quest of grandeur, accolades and praise for world changing discoveries, so obsessed with greatness, being the first name people remember, and all the other things his npd-isms tells him he wants.
And then there's "reminds me of camping with my brother. i wonder what he's up to..."
i mentioned in my previous post that stan acts quite a lot like the anchor to ford's boat, keeping him grounded and most importantly, safe from both the bitter and the sweet kinds of evils. but he also represents something so much simpler to ford too: the simple desires he represses so much because its not "good enough" for someone special like him.
he resents stan so much because he represents a "block" against that percieved good enough success he wants, the obstacle that made it impossible to get in a fancy college, become the world renowed researcher, the one who wanted to destroy his journal's and lifes work (even though it was the better, safer option if Bill really WAS that dangerous, which he was) that could still make him famous. because if ford's not "praised and weird" then he's just "weird" and being "weird" was nothing but a pain his whole life that kept him rejected and isolated from the masses. and stan prevented him from that.
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(btw "maybe he can prove himself to me" is nasty work my god ford is a douche lmao)
a lot of his projections of something greater comes through with how he treated dipper in the show (his whole spiel in damvtf) and fiddleford in journal 3 where he looks down on the happy life that fiddleford had with his wife and child and saying he was "wasting his talents" making computers. and like, we all know by the way he takes them on high stakes adventures they're not as prepared for compared to him (and end up causing more trouble than not by doing so), he's trying to fill a gaping hole left by someone else. we all know this obviously, we all know what we ship here, but what i came to appreciate the most about it is how much that gaping hole exists in the low stakes
everytime ford is thinking during the "down time" moments, his thoughts always drift back to his childhood, and one person who represents it.
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childhood memories, making fun of stans favorite snack, scribbling out a design of the stan o war, whenever Ford lets his mind wander it expresses such an intense yearning for the past before he became obsessed with wanting something more. these are his most utmost and most unfiltered thoughts, which is why he scribles them away or and writes in code. and the fact that he directly says they are about NOT getting married, followed with "wondering what he's doing right now", painting the picture of what his most ideal idylic life is. wanting a return of something lost. wanting Stan back more than anything.
he finally accepts that his dream never really changed, just the same as stan's and so they saild off together for the rest of their days, in ford's own words (which ironically sounds like a marriage to me either way so tough shit ford)
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sisterdivinium · 5 months
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There's a lot of stuff I'd love to do but then there's only so much time and only so much external interest regarding such events too.
Some sort of short fic exchange for non-juggernaut WN ships or some funky comment fic place or a capslock community for all your unhinged commentary needs or a WN bingo... I don't know, something.
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washedoutwings · 1 month
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yeah so uhhhh we’re always permanently low on motivation so umm yeah sorry but we are doing one of those note things
20 notes: we will try to take our meds more consistently
50 notes: draw at least something once a week
70 notes: eat something for breakfast every day (at least an apple or protein drink)
100 notes: start keeping better track of our delusions/hallucinations
150 notes: tell our therapist about 2 of our headmates
200 notes: start a system journal
300 notes: tell our therapist about 5 of our headmates
500 notes: tell our therapist about all of our headmates
700 notes: tell our doctor about about our chronic pain
1000 notes: eat something medium for breakfast at least three days a week (like a bowl of cereal)
1500 notes: ask our closer friends to use she/her less (they know that we’re trans)
from here on it’s more about just good habits that we don’t have much motivation for instead of self care type stuff, so less important
2000: draw every day (when possible)
2500: finish writing one of our wip stories/fics
3500: start working on an art commissions portfolio
4500: start working on a writing commissions portfolio
6000: set up art commissions
8000: set up writing commissions
sorry, we feel really guilty about this but we really need some motivation for this stuff. honestly we don’t expect this to even get to 20, but that’s fine! no deadline, ummm if you really want to spam idc, feel free to tag people. i’m not gonna tag anyone, i don’t want anyone to feel pressured
edit: WHAT THE FUCK where did yall come from???????
edit 2: damn i was offline for like 2 days and it was barely at 300 and we log back on to 500+ uhhhh thanks ig lol
edit 3: well we’re almost at 700 so..i guess i’m gonna add a couple more?
edit 4: the gimmicks got to us…also added some more
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likeumeanit9497 · 3 months
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just like that | m.s. |
matt sturniolo x fem!reader
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based on this request :))
summary: after dating for four months without having sex, y/n finally decides that she's ready to take matt for a ride
warnings: smut; established relationship; unprotected p in v; oral (fem receiving); riding; mentions of questionable consent (NOT with matt dw); dirty talk; 18+
notes: damn i completely forgot about this im so sorry:/ i've just been so busy over the past week or so it completely went under the radar. def not my best work (i wrote it all today), but i wanted to get it up because i'm going on a trip through europe for 6 (SIX???!!?!?!) weeks and will probably not be able to post much when im there. anyways i hope u all enjoy!!
p.s. working on one more fic that i would LOVE to post before i leave tomorrow, if not it might be a while before im able to write again :/ it's gonna be a good one for the matt girlies though so keep ur eyes peeled ;)
─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─
“Do you want anything from the kitchen baby?” Matt’s soft voice in my ear pulled me from the lull I was in, curled up beside him on the couch watching a movie. My drooping eyes fluttered open and I couldn’t help but smile once I came face-to-face with my beautiful boyfriend. The late-August sun was setting, and it shone through the living room windows in just the way that made Matt’s gorgeous blue eyes almost transparent; a harsh contrast to his dark eyelashes and tidy beard. He was looking at me with such unclouded care, the way he always did, and it never failed to make my heart flutter.
Matt and I had met on social media about six months ago, and started dating just two months after that. Our earliest conversations online had consisted of occasionally discussing our shared interest in pretty embarrassing hobbies — playing Minecraft, journaling, and watching rom-coms to name a few — but those occasional conversations evolved into staying up all night messaging each other, multiple-hour long Facetime calls, and eventually meeting at a restaurant for our first date.
Although it hadn’t been long since we started dating, Matt’s soul was one that I felt like I’ve known all my life. Never before had I felt more at home around another person than I did once I met him, and his presence in my life gave it a new level of stability that didn’t exist before. I had dated a guy in high school for almost two years, but the quality in the time spent with Matt versus him was incomparable. I was sure that Matt was the person that I was meant to be with, and everyday he did something new to prove that to be true without even trying.
Another thing that I loved so much about Matt was that, even after months of dating, he hasn’t once pushed me to have sex with him. In one of our early conversations, I had told him that my ex had always made me feel bad when I would turn down sex with him. While him and I did have sex a few times during our relationship, I had since come to terms with the fact that I really was just doing it to make him happy. Once Matt got over his immediate anger for me, he had sat me down and told me that he could wait forever, but that he won’t have sex with me unless I tell him I’m ready.
That was months ago, and still, he has kept his promise. While we have done plenty of other things in bed, he has always made it a point to stop everything before it gets to the point of sex. At first, I felt riddled with guilt because I felt like I should want to have sex with my boyfriend —especially one so kindhearted as Matt — but over time that guilt has fizzled out from Matt’s reassuring words and actions. He never ever put me in situations that he knew had the potential to make me uncomfortable, and wouldn’t allow me to feel bad about it either.
Lately, though, I had been feeling slightly different. While before, I would squirm at the thought of anything more happening once Matt’s hand would slip out of my panties, now I feel a slight tightening in my stomach at the idea of more. And before, I would feel a certain level of nervousness as I felt the weight of his member in my hand, where now there is a flutter in my core at the thought of that same part of him filling me up.
Never before in my life had I felt any of these feelings, and I didn’t quite know what to do with them. I was afraid of the abundance of dirty thoughts that flooded my own head constantly, and I realized that I was ready for more, but only with Matt. I had been contemplating on telling him this for the past week, but as I watched him walk back over to me on the couch in nothing but baggy grey sweats — the black ink of his tattoos hypnotizing me — my body reacted in such a way that let me know that tonight was the night.
“Here, I know you didn’t say you wanted anything but I grabbed you a water anyways. I haven’t seen you drink any yet today and you-” I cut Matt’s rambling off by climbing on top of his lap as soon as he was back on the couch; wrapping my arms around his neck and planting a deep kiss to his pink lips. He responded with a soft hum against my lips before wrapping his own arms around the small of my back. I opened my mouth slightly before pressing it against his again and moving them in a slow but passionate rhythm. Matt quickly followed suit, slipping his tongue through my parted lips before using it to explore my mouth. I fluttered my eyes open for a brief moment and caught a glimpse of Matt’s most beautiful features up close — lidded eyes, flushed cheeks, straight eyebrows — and released a satisfied sigh against his mouth.
I ran my hands through his soft brown hair, tugging slightly at the ends and eliciting a soft gasp from him as I felt my body flood with arousal. His hands travelled up and down my back, his firm yet somehow delicate touch a comfort that eased my nerves. From my place on his lap, I could feel a growing hardness against my ass. This wasn’t uncommon, obviously, but in the past I usually pretended to ignore it pressing against me. This time however, I rolled my hips up and down, feeling it slide against my aching core. “Baby.” Matt’s voice was barely above a whisper against my lips, but the combination of shock and arousal was still evident in its tone as he grabbed firmly onto my forearms to hold me still.
I detached my mouth from his while still keeping our faces just centimetres apart. His breath was rapid, but so was mine as we stayed like that for a moment; wild eyed and equally uncertain. Finally, I repeated my action by grinding my hips against his clothed shaft; this time watching as his eyes rolled back slightly in pleasure. “Y/n, what are you doing?” He mumbled, clearly wavering between making sure I was okay and wanting desperately for more. I continued grinding my hips against him, my mouth dropping open as I felt his shaft reach my nerves. “I want you Matt.” I whispered, and I watched as his eyes widened in shock; pupils dilated. “What do you mean?” He asked hesitantly, brushing his knuckles softly against my arms.
“I mean, I’m ready. Ready to have sex again.” I blurted out, feeling my face immediately flush in equal parts nervousness and arousal as I waited for him to respond. His face was unreadable as he clearly tried to gauge whether or not I was serious. That was confirmed once he finally spoke. “A-are you sure? I don’t want you to think just because I’m hard we have to do anything, baby.” I felt his dick twitch in between my legs as he spoke, and it shot electricity down my spine. “I know Matt, but I really am sure.” I responded, running my hands up and down his bare chest and leaving a trail of goosebumps in my path.
He continued to stare at me, his eyes travelling wildly across my face; clearly still in a state of uncertainty. I, on the other hand, was growing more and more frustrated by the moment as the heat continued to grow between my legs. “Give me your hand.” I stated, and he obliged; placing his much larger hand in my own. I guided his hand down to the waistband of my sweatpants, inside of the material, and finally slid it against my dripping wet core. Intaking a sharp breath from the contact, I watched his face as it immediately darkened once he felt my arousal coat his fingertips.
“See? I told you I’m ready,” I leaned forward slightly, bringing my lips to his exposed collarbone and kissing it wetly. “So please Matt, can you fuck me?” The room stayed silent for a beat, the only sounds being our ragged breathing, and I felt fear begin to trickle down my spine; worried that Matt might reject me. Just as I was about to retract everything I had just said, Matt’s hand snaked to the back of my head, guiding it up from his chest before crashing his lips onto mine.
I deepened the kiss immediately, feeling a mutual level of desperation like a surge of electricity between our lips that had never been there before. Matt’s hands began traveling all across my writhing body — taking his time on the curves of my ass — before planting firmly on my hips where he helped them grind against his rock hard member. Breathy, almost silent moans fell from both of our lips as our bodies slid against each other, and the deep-rooted sensation was taunting.
Matt’s hands slithered from my hips up to the bottom of my t-shirt, where he toyed with the material for a moment before detaching his lips from mine. “Can I take this off?” He asked, glazed eyes staring longingly into my own. I nodded, and without a moment’s hesitation my vision was blocked for a brief second by Matt peeling the fabric over my head and tossing it to the side. Once my vision returned, my view was of Matt’s hungry eyes glued to my bare chest.
Matt had seen my tits countless times before throughout our relationship, but at this moment it was like he was seeing them for the very first time. Mouth slightly parted, his breathing was ragged as he brought both hands to my chest and cupped my tits delicately between them; pushing them together slightly and brushing a thumb along each nipple. I hissed at the feeling, and that seemed to pull him from his trance, as his eyes immediately shot up to mine. “This okay baby?” He asked, and I nodded my head wildly.
A smirk toyed at the corners of his mouth before he attached it to my left nipple. I released short moans as he sucked and nibbled it gently, still pressing my core against his throbbing shaft. I felt myself falling deeper and deeper into a trance that I had never experienced before, and it was like my body and mind had completely separated as I mindlessly tugged desperately at the waistband of his sweats. Catching on to my gesture, Matt shifted slightly below me before using one of his hands to haphazardly pull his sweats down slightly; allowing his cock to spring up in between my legs.
I gasped at the sight before me, only now realizing its true size with it between my legs and feeling just a tinge of excited fear trying to figure out just how it was going to fit inside of me. Shaking the thought from my mind, I collected a pool of saliva in my mouth before spitting it in my hand and bringing it down to his shaft.
Running my thumb along his slit, I felt his whole body shudder below me from the contact. I began pumping my hand up and down his length; spending extra time twisting my wrist around his sensitive tip, and watched as his mouth went slack on my tits. “Mmm, keep doing it just like that baby.” He muttered against my plump skin, and I continued to work his cock in my hand while simultaneously grinding my core against its base. Just knowing that I was making him feel good was making me feel good, and my eyes rolled to the back of my head in pleasure.
After a few short moments, I felt Matt’s hands snake to the waist band of my own sweats. My eyes found his again, and I watched as they searched my face. “You’re sure you want this, Y/n?” He asked, his voice gentle but laced with a huskiness that could only be explained as pure desire. I nodded desperately once again, feeling so pathetic but not capable of giving a shit. “I’m sure baby, please.” My voice had a slight whine to it, making my frantic need even more evident.
Planting a soft kiss to my lips, he grabbed firmly onto my sweats and began peeling them off of my body. I lifted my hips up slightly to assist him in this, and once I dropped them back down, I hissed from the feeling of my bare core against his cock. “Matty, I need you right now.” I practically cried out, leaning my body forward and planting nibbles and kisses along his exposed neck. The suspense was torturous, my body only just now recognizing how badly it was craving his.
His hands cupped my ass, and he used his grip to lift me just a couple inches off of him. I felt him spread me open slightly before dragging a finger once again against my aching folds. “Mmm, so wet for me baby.” I released a breathy moan at the combination of his touch and words, and squirmed in his grasp. “I’ll help you get it in, but I want you on top. That way you can take it as slow as you need to, okay?” His voice softened as he spoke, and his hands massaged me gently causing me to physically relax. “O-okay.” I muttered, so turned on that I was willing to do just about anything he wanted me to.
Just then, he placed a soft kiss to my lips before I felt the very tip of his cock brush against my opening; causing me to gasp. “Shh, it’s okay baby. I’ll go slow.” He whispered in my ear, and I pressed my forehead into the crook of his neck in anticipation. Finally, I felt my walls begin to expand as he pressed the first few inches into me. Moaning at the sensation, I felt my whole body flush in immediate lust. As if they had a mind of their own, my hips subconsciously began lowering onto his shaft; taking more and more of him as I sunk down.
A moan fell from his lips as my walls enveloped him inch by inch, and I slowly lifted my head from his neck and straightened my body up to allow more of him to fill me up. Even though he was big and I hadn’t had a dick in me in a long time, my slick arousal allowed him to bottom out without causing me to feel any pain; only indescribable pleasure. Once every inch of him was in me, I stayed still for a moment looking down at him. His desire was plastered across every inch of his face, and it made him look impossibly beautiful. There was no fear in me in that moment, only want, and so I began riding him.
As soon as I propelled my body up and down his shaft just once, I felt a pit of arousal begin to grow in my stomach. Groaning in pleasure, I continued with my moments; holding onto his shoulders to keep my trembling body stable. “Mmm you feel so good baby.” Matt moaned out, his eyes never leaving my pinched face. After a while, my body adjusted completely to his size and I was able to increase my speed. As I slid my walls up and down his shaft, Matt gripped onto my ass with all his might, using his hands to help me maintain my speed.
Moans fell from my lips as his cock ruthlessly hit my g-spot, and I felt my lower stomach build in pressure. “Fuck.” I muttered under my breath, feeling my skin go flush from the heat of the moment. The room filled with the echo of our wet skin slapping against each other, adding to the erotic air around us. Prolonged strings of moans fell aimlessly from my lips, and as I came closer and closer to my impending climax I began struggling to maintain my movements.
Matt seemed to pick up on this, as he adjusted his hips and began pounding into me from below; his hands holding me in place where I just clung onto him for dear life. “F-fuck Matty, like that. S-so good.” I cried out, my voice choppy from his rapid movements. My brain melted into a pool of liquid as all I could think about was reaching my high that was just out of reach. “You’re taking me so good baby.” Matt groaned out as he continued driving his length into me, staring deeply into my eyes with a fogged over expression.
“I-I think I’m gonna — oh god, think I’m g-gonna cum Matt.” My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I dug my nails into his shoulder blades, struggling to give into this new overwhelming sensation bubbling up inside of me. At this, a guttural moan fell from his lips and he somehow increased the speed of his thrusts even more. “Want you to cum around me baby, please.” There was a desperate whine to his voice as he spoke through his shortness of breath, and it was enough for me to reach my climax. Legs shaking, I released a plethora of moans and curses as my body was hit with multiple waves of indescribable pleasure. “Good girl, feels so good honey.” Matt’s voice was soft in my ear, and it helped to bring me back to earth as my hurricane of an orgasm left my body in shambles.
I continued to bounce on Matt’s dick slowly as I attempted to regain what little composure I had before my orgasm stole it from me, but I quickly learned that all of my energy had been stripped away. My body was trembling uncontrollably, and my head was filled with a fog that made it difficult for me to stay upright. Matt caught on to this, as he planted his hands firmly on my hips, keeping me still, before reaching forward and kissing me deeply. “You tired, baby?” He asked gently, rubbing circles on my sensitive skin. Sheepishly, I nodded, and Matt didn’t hesitate before guiding me off of his lap and helping me lay down on the couch.
As soon as my head hit the soft material, I felt my body immediately begin to relax again. I watched from my place on the couch as Matt began to slowly crawl over to me, before leaning above me. “You did so good baby,” He brought his lips to my chest and began dropping soft kisses against my skin, “Now,” His mouth travelled from my chest down to my stomach, “I want you to just lay here and relax,” He continued to move his lips down my stomach to my hips, “Let me make you feel good, okay?” His face was now hovering above my swollen heat, and I couldn’t help but nod frantically, feeling a sudden need to have his mouth on me.
Matt situated his body so that he could lay down with his face still just above my core. He brought both of his hands to my folds and I flinched as he used his thumbs to spread them apart slightly; exposing my bundle of nerves to the air. My vision partially skewed by his hair flopping in front of his eyes, I watched in awe as he brought his mouth closer and closer to where I needed it the most; before immediately gasping in pleasure once I felt his warm tongue make contact with my clit.
Immediately, Matt got to work in swirling his tongue in expert circles on my overstimulated nerves. This sensation in combination with his rough beard against my inner thighs was so intense it was almost painful in the best way possible, and I was incapable of controlling the throaty moans that fell from my lips as I watched him devour me entirely. Matt then used his mouth to suck on my nerves, bringing forward yet another new sensation that drove me crazy. It felt so unbelievably good, my hands flew to his hair where I held firmly; doing everything in my power to keep him in place. “Oh yeah baby, please, just like that.” I struggled to get the words out through my constant gasps of pleasure, but it was clear that they didn’t fall on deaf ears as Matt moaned in pleasured acknowledgement against my heat and kept his rhythm and pressure the exact same.
Feeling another orgasm begin to bear its teeth in my stomach, it was like my hips grew a mind of their own because as soon as Matt brought his hands under my ass to lift me slightly up on the couch; I began grinding my heat against his eager mouth. “Fuck.” He moaned against my clit as he continued to greedily suck and lick my nerves. I squeezed my eyes shut as a whine escaped my lips from an approaching orgasm, the pleasure that his mouth was giving me was too much. “S-stop baby.” I said suddenly, to which he immediately detached his mouth from me and I watched as his eyes scanned my fucked out face. “What’s wrong? You want to stop?” He seemed so concerned, clearly worried that he had somehow crossed a boundary, and it caused my chest to flutter. “N-no. It’s just, I was gonna cum again.” He raised a quizzical eyebrow, clearly confused by how that might be a problem. “I…I want to cum with you.” I finally said, and watched as his facial expression changed from one of concern back to one filled with lust.
He smiled quickly before dragging his body up my own, planting occasional kisses along my body on his way. Once he reached my head, he immediately began kissing me passionately, slipping his tongue through my parted lips and allowing me to taste myself on his mouth. Pulling away, I noticed my arousal laced throughout his beard, and that along with his pink swollen lips fresh off of my heat was enough to make my head spin. Just then, I felt him line his shaft up with my entrance, and immediately gasped out when he slid it in completely. Before moving at all, Matt took a moment to gaze down at my destroyed face before grabbing my legs and wrapping them around his waist. He then leaned forward and propped himself on his forearms on either side of my head; slipping a hand through my hair and grabbing onto it gently.
After noticing my body relax, he finally began thrusting into me. Starting off slow and deep, he gradually increased his speed until he was pounding his inches deep into me at a rapid pace. Already being close to cumming, I struggled to get a grip on my thoughts as the pleasure of the moment pulled me deeper and deeper into a world of euphoria. “You’re so tight sweetheart.” He muttered through his grunts, and I felt my eyes roll to the back of my head at his words. “F-feels so good Matty.” I managed to reply, tightening my legs around his waist as I tried everything I could to hold off my orgasm.
Matt’s hand snaked through my hair before he grabbed onto my cheek, brushing it gently with his thumb as he stared at me with a gaze so intense that it was almost intimidating. “I-I’m close Y/n.” He nearly whispered, and I felt his pace begin to slow slightly as he began to be overtaken by his own orgasm. My eyebrows knitted together as I felt my walls began to break. “M-me too.” I replied, wrapping my hands tightly around his biceps to keep me grounded. “Ah fuck, I’m cumming baby.” His erotic words were followed by a string of animalistic grunts as he drove his cock in and out of me — slow but hard — and it was like my body was waiting to hear those words as my second orgasm immediately ran through me like a freight train.
My breathy moans harmonized with his deep ones, and I felt my walls contract around his shaft; milking his dick as it painted them white. My legs were wrapped so tightly around his waist, he was barely able to move them as we both rode the waves of our intense pleasure. As my orgasm continued to tear through me, my back arched off of the couch and my body trembled. From above me, Matt watched me writhe in bliss as his movements completely stopped. As I finally began coming down from my high, I felt his hand brush through my hair affectionately, and watched as his face turned up in a smile before he placed a deep kiss to my lips.
He gently pulled his cock out of me, causing me to wince from the raw pain, before laying beside me on the couch and pulling me into him. Face to face, we stared lovingly at each other for a moment; my mind still spinning from how good he had made me feel, and in that moment I was worried that my heart might explode. His blissed expression told me that he was feeling the same, and his hand delicately rubbing the small of my back confirmed it. “Are you okay?” He finally asked, minor concern visible on his beautiful face. “I’m more than okay.” I answered honestly with a chuckle, causing him to laugh in relief as well. “I think I actually love sex.” I continued, causing him to really laugh this time before planting a kiss on my sweat-beaded forehead. “Well I think I actually love you.”
─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─
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thatgirlie-diaries · 11 months
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How I get out of a slump
Hello girlies! Welcome to another blog of mine. This topic was very spontaneous for me to write about. I'm having a writers block since last week because I have been stuck in a rut, that's my reason bts. I'm going to tell you my personal tips to get out of this state and regain your consistency on a healthy lifestyle!
My tips
Journaling: You may do this step whenever you feel it's right, but I think it's important to be concious about why are you in a rut in the first place and what you can do for you to feel better and get back stronger. You may let yourself just dump and feelings or go to Pinterest and look out for prompts.
Tidy up my space & take a shower: I truly believe that our space is a reflection of our own mind, as so I think that I reflect my state in how much I take care of my appearance and hygiene. So, this is the first thing I do to step into a state in which I feel clean and calm and able to focus on my mind after taking care of my physical space. Take your time to cleanse yourself!
Listen to high vibe music: I know my ruts happen in first place because I am in a low vibrational state and with a negative mindset. Even if it's not your case, I reccomend you to listen to songs that motivates you and empowers you up to again make an effort for yourself , rather than listening to low mood lyrics.
Revisit your goals: it's time to think again about what are the things you want to accomplish. Ask yourself what do you need to get back on track: Are there any goals that don't align with you no more or you need to change to be accomplished? What are the habits or steps you need to take?
Take it slow: We are just getting out of a rut, so it has been hard for us this days to keep track on habits and goals, even to do simple things. Girl, take it easy and at your own peace, no one is chasing you and your wellness it's first before other matters. If you need to, break down your habits or steps into small ones. One of my favorite reminders is "something is better than nothing". Examples: You don't feel with the energy to clean your room? Use a timer of 10 minutes. Can't read? Just read one page. What matters is that you are making an effort to be in a better place.
Take care of your health: First things first. Related to other points of the blog, take care fo your health and then focus on heavier effort or alongside doing small but significant actions. Health is something we start neglecting when we are in a slump (alongside keeping our space clean, our goals & habits and our mind). Make sure you are sleeping well, having a healthy diet, doing exercise, take some sun, whatever you need to do to have a healthy body.
Be consistent!: Consistency will be an important point in this one. For me, the hardest thing is taking the decision to take the first steps, after it keep them on track until you feel better. Rather than seeing it as discipline, see it as devotion. Think that "you are being devoted in taking care of yourself and giving you the best present and future", it sounds lovely, isn't it?
Health + Clean space → Reflection → Revisit your goals → Take small steps →Consistency
Let's get out of this one together! 𑄽𑄺ྀ
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marlshroom · 1 month
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came to the fucked up realization after finishing gravity falls again last night the parallels of the dream bubble bill made for mabel and the literal state of delusion he keeps himself in.
in the book of bill on the page where bill cipher describes how he figured out a way to manipulate her into giving him the rift, it says:
"Summers ending, my guy. Ending to death, bro. She'd do anything to make it last just a day longer. Probably something RASH and OUT OF CHARACTER, even!"
as we know, mabel cannot handle the fact that she will be growing up. that the relationship with her brother is going to change. she is scared of high school.
bill then says "That was it. She'd never make a deal with me. But she'd make a deal with someone she believed could give her more time. The dream was done. I had her."
bill then creates the dream bubble for mabel, he makes every one of her dreams come true, a place where time is still and she can be a kid forever. a lie so great that she wont have to face the truth.
in journal 3 on one of the pages bill is writing in code, we see this:
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[ID: "I ask you, why must[should] time only move forward? Why must cause preceded effect. Who voted on the law of physics."]
my friend helped me break down what bill means by this:
why can we only move forward in the 4th dimension of time. why does something have to make another thing happen, why must cause come before the effect. why cant you move backwards, in the other direction, change the decisions youve made.
how interpret this is bill asking why he is not able to back and stop what he did to his family. he says to ford that he tried and failed to undo the past.** why did him wanting people to acknowledge his advantages instead of suppress him lead to the destruction of his whole dimension?
**(i just want to point out that this is probably the time where bill is the MOST open to anybody, or at least the first. to his henchmaniacs he had been telling them that he liberated his dimension until the oracle discovered the truth. here, to ford, he got so much closer to telling the truth. he SHOWS ford the last atoms of his world. he says that it was destroyed by a monster, not that it was liberated! destroyed)
back to when bill says "I had her" about mabel, he had her cause he knew exactly what needed to happen to trap mabel in a delusion because it is exactly what he is doing to himself. creating a fake narrative of what happened to him, that he was vindicated in killing his whole dimension. only ever doing exactly what he wants because confronting the truth is too scary for him(good fucking lord). the morality page offers good insight into this too.
i am actually just going to quote the whole page and highlight the important part. it speaks for itself really
"THE POINT IS it's[morality] is a very flexible concept! But parents and presidents don't want you to know that, because then you might start asking other questions, like who put them in charge, anyway? So they cram your brain full of guilt and regrets for transgressing the laws that they just made up(the laws that they made to prevent the destruction of their dimension, regardless of if the law + the wrongful medication of a fucking baby triangle did any good to actually prevent it). Wouldn't it be nice if you could put all that baggage down? Quell the shame that follows you everywhere for a lifetime of crimes? MAKE THE SCREAMS FINALLY STOP? The good news is you CAN silence that annoying voice, and here's how!
DENIAL
Works 100% of the time in every situation. What you you mean there are people who disagree? I can confidently say there aren't!
RATIONALIZATION
If you can do it, you can justify it! "Truth" is open-source code and anyone can edit it anytime! Want to be like me? List 3 "evil" things and then 3 "reasons why they're actually good." You'll be rationalizing like Bill in no time!
DETACHMENT
Did you know 100% of your human cells die and are replaced every 7 years? That means that anything you did 7 years ago wasn't even you-it was some dead loser! You can't be held accountable for what a dead person did! What? You think this is just another form of rationalization? I DENY THAT!
THE BILL CIPHER DECISION METHOD!
Working over the eons, the voices in my head teamed up and worked out a foolproof method for making any decision in any situation.
DO WHATEVER I WANT."
ooooooooooooooooooh boy.
he is fully admitting here that he is living in a completely different really in order to justify doing whatever he wants. he gives mabel the tools to deny, to rationalize, to detach herself from the reality of it all. that time has to move forward. and he thinks it will work because it worked on himself.
but it doesn't work on mabel because she understands that she needs other people. shes vunerable, she lets people in, admits when shes wrong. and bill cant do that because it would destroy the fantasy he's created for himself.
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hamsternella · 1 month
Note
maybe headcanons of Bill Cipher being obsessed with us for being Ford's wife, but at first he feels jealous and gradually that changes as he finds we have equal things (e.g. we are blind, and that makes Bill start to want to get more intimate with us as he has with Ford because he finds that we have also been despised/put aside because of that difference), and maybe he wants to make a deal with us but we refuse out of loyalty to Ford and that makes Bill jealous- but now of Ford, not of us lmao sorry if that is confusing or too specific.
Are you going to write any Gravity Falls fanfic on the side? I've seen your poll and I'm very excited
HELLO, and no problem. Here it is, I hope you like it.
As for the fanfic, I do plan to write one. Actually, it's in drafts; I just need to correct what I have written. I don't know if I should make it long or cut it and put it in chapters.
Bill Cipher being obsessed with you [headcanon]
cw: fem!reader, non-con touching, possessed body, jealousy, maybe a bit of ooc(?
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The reason Bill begins to feel his plan is threatened is because of you. As much as Ford has him on a pedestal, you are still the main reason for his early accomplishments. The special person who has been with him since his college discovery years.
You're not like McGucket; your judgment carries paramount weight in Ford's most decisive decisions. You're not a mentally dazzling woman, not like him, but your claws keep you firmly entrenched behind Sixer's back. Bill repudiates that—it makes no sense at all!
As if that weren't enough, the affair culminates with you being blind. Can there be anything much more repugnant than a romance fueled by misfortune? Ford is drawn to your sincere heart, and you support him unconditionally because beyond your husband's obsession, your love for him seems to break down the most terrifying walls. And how can you be afraid of something you can no longer see?
Bill feels he has the enemy breathing behind his back. For the first time he thinks he can't solve everything with a kick to the rock in the middle of the road.
The closest thing to a tantrum you get from him —unknowingly— are regular nightmares, a weak body and constant paranoia about unfamiliar sounds and sensations. Your home is suddenly a new world; frightening and strange. Because of this you become clumsy and unpredictable, and even your husband doesn't understand what it is that has you so off track.
Bill can't use his influence on your reality at all, but through Ford and other extensions, as well as fine print manipulations, he manages to reach you without arousing suspicion.
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''I've told you many times, Bill,'' sighed Ford with his back turned, both hands placed on his journal. ''I don't think I can go through with this completely until I manage to find a way to help my wife.''
''Isn't this a sign that it's time to get her out of your way?''
"Excuse me?’’ The man turned his attention to the demon; his eyes laden with bitterness and desolation. ''What do you mean by that? I can't abandon my wife, Cipher—she would never do something like that to me.''
''Well,'' Bill chuckled, ''it's not like she's really done anything for you all this time. This project is our thing, Fordsy, and it shouldn't be interrupted by a little stumble that doesn't even belong to us. Or are you going to give up everything you've sacrificed for this?''
''You have understood me like no other, Bill; I admit that there is no person or creature existing on this planet who can do all that you have done for me,'' admitted Ford solemnly. ''But she's my wife—she's been around even before you, when I was nobody. When I had nothing. And even when I came to Gravity Falls and left everything behind she was always there. Bill, I... I can't, I'm sorry.''
Bill held back another complaint, beginning to notice that things were not working out the way he had wanted. Your clumsiness didn't kill Ford's patience or control, but what little sanity —if any— there was in him. It was humiliating; Bill Cipher losing to a human being, a random woman—blind, to make it worse.
The demon was beginning to withdraw in on himself, frustration rising to anger, when Ford's voice from the entrance to the room drew his gaze back. There was a different gleam in his companion's, and Cipher understood with annoyance where the conversation would end up now.
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Your husband introduces you to the possible solution to all your problems: Mr. Cipher, a doctor and close friend of Stanford. A mysterious man with a booming voice that makes your hair stand on end, but at the end of the day a man of studies and degrees. Of course you were going to trust your husband's recommendation.
''What a coincidence that you happened to be passing by, sir! Thank you for offering to help me. That's very kind of you.''
Bill starts pretending to be your personal doctor in search of a miracle solution to your problems. It's not hard to avoid contact with you to hide the truth; Ford tries hard to keep the situation straight.
If the demon hated you before, now you better start praying.
Cipher understands that he needs to play along with Ford if he wants the project to stay on track, even if that means starting to help you heal while containing his desire to get rid of you.
Maybe if he possessed Stanford and took advantage of you during your naps.
Maybe.
But he knows better than that—Ford isn't stupid. Not stupid enough, at least.
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It was humiliating to have to take care of what he himself had caused, but it's not as if Bill could afford any other way to get back on the project. Ford was all he had. Where was he going to get someone else capable enough? This had been fate; interrupted at the last minute by the appearance of a bad third. This was all your fault. Blind little rat—woman busybody with a sweet smile and giggly voice. Cipher understood why Sixer was where he was with you, on the one hand. On the other it was all the same: a whim that cost dearly. Who needed someone like you? What was the benefit? Sex, maybe? But Bill Cipher was a thousand times better than something so banal! Please…
Bill rolled his eye, snapping his fingers to undo the nightmare you were in. As soon as your dream was undone you let out an exclamation of surprise, jumping on the bed. You brought a hand to your face, feeling the sweat, and almost immediately moved your body to where he lay. Cipher held back surprise, finding himself genuinely intrigued.
''Doctor,'' you whispered hoarsely, ''good afternoon. I... Forgive me, I think I fell asleep—it was sudden, I don't know what came over me...''
''Did you know it was me here with you?''
The smile you gave him threw him off. A ''Well, yes, isn't it very obvious?'' kind of grimace.
''Does your husband know that you have these nightmares during our therapies?''
'Therapies' sounded fancy, but it was shorthand for the tortures Bill forced you to go through; a theater of supposed recovery to cover up his need to hurt you.
“He doesn't know, doctor. I haven't told him, if I'm honest,'' you replied. ''Please don't tell him anything.''
''It would be unethical!''
‘’Pretending to be a doctor is also unethical, sir,’’ you laughed. ''I am blind, not stupid.’’
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Killing you was going to be the only solution to all of this—although from that day on nothing else ever happened.
Bill has to accept that you have a lot of tricks up your sleeve. You're not just any woman anymore; being Ford's wife had to have been warning enough for him.
You continue to not remind him of his charade and allow him to continue 'treating' you, while your husband resumes the plans for the portal.
Surprisingly, Bill seems to have found interest in something much more striking.
You.
The nightmares subside, your mood and judgment improve, and Cipher finds a strange pleasure in this new side of you: much more alert, more talkative and wittier. You have your charm.
But it's your husband who pulls the reins. Bill gets it right away.
Evenings with you aren't exactly revelatory like they are with Ford, who always has enough data and information to surprise everyone with. With you it's different; it's something much more intimate and almost forgotten by Bill. He knows so much that it would be impossible to be taken by surprise—but you manage to do it.
He is overcome with a nostalgic and unpleasant feeling, but which ironically keeps him alive as he decides to lie to Ford.
Bill doesn't want to let you go. It's strange. Maybe he got used to another glaring presence besides Sixer? Torturing you a little more in silence to keep you under his care should not be a stupid thing to do at all.
Cipher encounters another particular feeling: curiosity. He needs to know why you know what you know; and what it is, above all else, that keeps you here.
What keeps you with so much power over him, Bill Cipher.
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''Are you saying that I have tricks up my sleeve? I don't get it, doctor...''
''Oh! Oh, please,'' Bill interrupted, thunderous laughter bouncing across the room. ''You know I'm no doctor; the title is ridiculous.''
''Should I call you 'Mr. Cipher' instead?''
Bill held back a sigh, rubbing his eye for a moment before orbiting around you. If you had noticed, you didn't say or do anything. Your eyes, white as opaque pearls, remained fixed on a corner of the room.
''Since when did you know I wasn't a doctor? No, better yet, since when did you know I wasn't human?''
''Well, it's not quite like that either,'' you replied under a soft laugh. ''You just revealed to me that you are not human. As for the doctor thing... Well, don't take this the wrong way, but I don't think that dream therapies and transverse snoring with citrus scent induction while dipping my feet in spoiled milk is something a professional would recommend.''
Bill pretended not to be offended.
''Besides that,'' you continued, ''I know my husband very well. I know that he hides dangerous things down there, where I cannot reach by myself, just as I know everything that has been happening is not the product of chance.''
''Did you know all this time that your nightmares and fears have been my doing?''
‘’No, not really. You just confessed it to me.''
‘’Oh, come on!’’ Bill shook his fists in the air, abruptly remembering that you couldn't see him. It was strange, you seemed to know the world you inhabited even though your eyes wouldn't let you. The thought made the demon orbit around you again, returning in front of you. Opaque pearls; gaze lost in the open. "I've had a majestic revelation at this very moment! Do you want to hear it, or will your big, bold woman brain let you know in advance what I have to say?”
"I have a slight feeling you don't like me.”
“Yes or no!”
“Of course, tell me.”
"I have to assume you weren't born blind; this must be the product of an accident," Cipher began to say. "That would explain why the hell you do everything you do, and why the fuck you know where I am.”
"That's right, Mr. Cipher," you nodded. "I've had an accident, though I suppose you know that because you've infiltrated me. Either that, or my husband told you.”
"So you did know that I'm a demon?”
“You just—”
“Oh, shut up! Don't fucking say it again.”
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Your coexistence with Bill becomes pleasant, despite the early revelation of his nature and his having been the cause of your misfortunes.
Cipher comes to believe that he may have been wrong; maybe you were stupid after all.
But that would be crazy! Unlike with Ford, with you the feelings are extremely nostalgic and warm. There is no trace of some kind of farce or genuine morbid interest behind your words. You believe everything you say.
Bill, who despite not sleeping or dreaming, being haunted by the memory of screams and an old distorted and flat reality, finds in your company a comfort zone that makes him delirious.
Sadly, your heart and your judgment is still tied to Sixer—as if that brainiac cared at all!
Bill begins to drive Ford crazy; he feeds him extensive knowledge, possesses him more often to enjoy the benefits, and then alters his memories, making it difficult for him to know what is truth and what is a lie.
Where he can no longer meet your needs, Bill is always there to dazzle you.
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You jumped in your seat, feeling your husband's warm hands wrap around your neck. Fingers, rough from machines and dust, caressed your skin awkwardly, drawing a chuckle from you. His breath came to you from above, as if he had just sighed in delight at your reaction. When you felt him rest his hands on your shoulders, you slowly brought one of yours to caress the back of his. You felt him tremble.
''I thought you were sleeping?'' you asked with genuine interest. ''Is everything all right? All these days you've been doing the same thing.''
''Do you mind, beautiful?''
You stifled a laugh.
''No, Ford, your company would never be a bother to me... Are you smelling my hair?''
‘’I just can’t get enough of you.’’
You felt him circle your body, delineating one of the chairs near you so he could relax his body in it. You didn't last long without his hands—as soon as he resumed his seat, you felt his fingers intertwining with yours. This time it was more consistent and comfortable; not like all those days where it seemed like your husband had forgotten how to use his own body.
''Oh, dear! Seeing you with these two orbs of nerves and membrane is amazing! You look even more dazzling.''
Although the comments without any context or sense were still there.
''I'm not that great,'' you said with a small laugh. A little shy. Ford didn't used to give you so many compliments. “How's your project going?’’
‘’That thing? Good, very good. Excellent, my dear! Maybe you could see for yourself—oh, well, you can't,'' he guffawed. ''Right. Whatever! Hey, uh, can I ask you a question?''
‘’Y-Yeah, sure, honey.’’ You cleared your throat. ‘’What’s the matter?’’
''Hypothetical scenario. You're married, but you're not quite fulfilled. Suppose someone comes along who is much better than your husband,'' he explained. ''He's smart, funny, multifunctional, powerful, extra-dimensional, or very soon will be, and also very stylish!'' Silence. Moments later an exclamation. ''Do you have a favorite color? His favorite color is yellow!''
‘’I… I mean, sorry, but I actually don’t understand at all where’s the question.’’
‘’Don’t be silly! Would you leave your husband for this entity—excuse me, for this person?''
‘’What?’’
‘’The heck.’’
Another booming laugh, and though you tried to accompany it with your own, the sound that came from you was choppy and awkward. This exchange was strange.
''I can't find a reason to leave my husband for this so-called mystery person,'' you replied. ''I am supposed to have married him for a reason which should be more than enough. Ford,'' you rushed on, ''is this regarding Mr. Cipher?''
''Why?'' he asked at once. ''Why do you think of him all of a sudden? Do you feel something forbidden about him in this marriage?''
''But of course not!''
''What do you mean ‘no’?!’’
His hands let go of yours. The chair in front of you seemed to be dragged, the wood against the floor squeaking with the sudden friction. The movement had taken you by surprise.
‘’Ford?’’
''Why are you so happy? Why, huh?'' he sighed, frustrated. ''Haven't I abandoned you every night in a freezing bed, while I prefer the company of machines? Cipher has been very kind to you and kept you company!''
''Ford, what are you—wait. Wait a moment... Bill, is this you?'' You covered your mouth, terrified at the discovery. Your companion didn't respond and you simply let out a shaky breath. ''Are you possessing my husband?’’
‘’Damn, that was fast.’’
‘’That’s awful!’’
"There was full consent!" added Bill with a chuckle. "This is a man-to-man thing, my pretty little fleshbag. Something between colleagues, plain and simple. You needn't fear—Bill Cipher is taking care of everything.”
"But it's horrendous anyway!" you exclaimed with your voice splitting. "It all makes sense now... The words, the touches, the way you acted—it was all a sham! You were using my husband!”
"Oh, please, little one. Wasn't it you who dreamed of being able to touch me?”
"You, not a substitute class using Stanford's body! Have you two been doing these kinds of exchanges all along?”
"It's just that there was a change of plans!”
“A change? What—”
“I mean, I tried to kill you; but it's not that easy now,” he laughed.
You tried to calm your breathing. Your heart was beating painfully against your chest, and your whole body was trembling. This wasn't right, obviously. It was like a vivid nightmare.
“Not that I want to do it, of course.”
“Why?” you asked after a long silence.
You felt the presence of your husband's body very close to you. A pair of hands rested on your cheeks, caressing them with his fingers very softly; the touches getting lost under the trembling of your figure when you heard again a sigh of delight. Something was up.
“You know,” he whispered, “I think we could make a deal. A little, pretty one, and just for you.”
“A deal? A deal with a demon, you mean. No, thank you.”
“Oh, come on! It will be fun!”
“And it makes no sense.”
Bill turned away from you, returning to his chair to take a seat across from your body.
"What exactly is it that Ford gives you that I can't manage to satisfy? Because very soon the little project will be complete, and I will have full disposal of many wonderful tricks to take care of you, my dear," he continued. "An eternity together! We'll be able to create and tell thousands of new stories; to travel across the world and let you experience hundreds of new sensations. We'll be unstoppable! Incomparable!”
"That's not the way things work, Bill…”
"Things work because of the strongest. I will soon be the only one with that title.”
"What will happen to Ford?" you asked haltingly. "What will you do to my husband?”
"He's my co-worker, dear.”
"You're hiding something from me.”
"So what if it is? He doesn't matter here! It's our time... You're mine.”
The way your husband's voice was beginning to distort sent a shiver through your body. You loved Ford—you missed him. The idea that you had been kissing the lips of a man possessed a couple of days ago was turning your stomach. Your silence seemed to feed something inside the demon; his voice thundered, totally changed, across the room.
"A few weeks ago you said you missed the stars," added Bill. "The last time you saw them was when you were a teenager. I miss the stars too—the ones I saw with a different eye. It's not the same anymore. Nothing is, since..." Silence. You didn't dare interrupt the creature who seemed to be drowning in bitter memory. It took him a while to pull himself together; a split laugh piercing your ears like an arrow. "Oh, the misery! I thought it repulsive the way you two looked so united over something so pathetic. Anyway, what does the past matter now, what does misery matter! There's no such thing being with Bill Cipher. You'll want for nothing.”
"I refuse, Bill.”
"And I refuse too," he laughed. "See? We can play the same game, silly. I don't recommend testing my patience, though.”
The touch of palms against the warm skin of your neck took you by surprise. The roughness of those fingers you loved so much were now forbidding you to breathe; the softness of moist lips pressing against yours, taking advantage of the way you parted yours to find a sliver of air. You soon struggled against your husband's body, desperate to deny the foreign tongue that flicked unseemly and inexperienced inside you. Bill was drowning in an unfamiliar feeling that felt too good. You were soft, fragile. Your flesh was tender and warm, quivering like an animal about to die—he was going to devour it to the bone. Was this what Ford had been doing with you? You liked it?
He could kill you. He could end your life when the portal was complete; he could take advantage of Ford, as he had been doing all this time, and keep the prize all to himself. Why was it so hard? What was it you had done to him? Was Ford a victim too? The thought burned like a fierce fury at the back of his mind—jealousy once again. The need to own even the crumbs. Ford wouldn't have the right to be your victim anymore. This feeling was too good for that brainiac to understand, surely he never did.
But Bill understood everything. He was incomparable. He could dominate your life and hold the reins as well as Ford had been doing. No. Cipher was going to do better! Did you miss your husband's domination? Bill would be your ruler; he would destroy obstacles and build better ones to keep you in check. Maybe a little training and you'd become a beautiful little bag of flesh and muscle—tight, warm and obedient. And who knows if you'd end up exceeding his expectations! Who knows if a little gift occupying your orbs would give you the chance to enjoy the same star-studded sky together.
"Don't think too much," whispered Bill pantingly. "There's plenty of other things to do than something as dull as that. Don't worry your pretty little head.”
You shook your head, surrendered to crying. Your husband's hands had left your neck, but now they wrapped around your wet cheeks, offering shy caresses.
"From now on you're going to use it when I say so. Everything will be that way, and you know why?”
A crooked laugh vibrated against his chest, reaching you through his hands.
"Because now you will be my new pet. A special one! The best of them all… You could say ‘muse’, even. Isn't that beautiful, dear?”
A cold kiss. The last one.
“Aren't you, above all, beautiful too?”
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mywritersmind · 5 days
Text
SAVIOR - LN4
pt.2
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summary : Y/n’s favorite place has quickly become her and Lando’s shared hallway. They grow closer and finally make it to the fresh air.
OG SUMMARY (When y/n’s absent neighbor shows up, causing her great annoyance with smoke and repetitive beeping, she marches over to tell the man off but is met with a handsome face and strong hands that are in distress.)
listen up : no warnings!! y/n is clueless abt f1. lando is silly. i’m craving strawberries now.
word count : 1878
⋆。‧˚⋆
I haul my five grocery bags into the elevator, struggling to keep them all off the ground. I sigh when I finally still in the metal box, i’ve carried these at least two blocks and one had broken on the way.
The doors are about to close but a hand slides in between them, making them automatically open for him.
Hello my hot mysterious neighbor.
He looks relieved he made it, “Y/n!” He says cheerfully, like we’ve known each other for ages. It’s been a couple weeks since I slammed on his door and stomped through his kitchen.
The other side of the hallway had been quiet until last night when I heard keys rattling and the door opening. I can’t help but wonder what he does that keeps him from home so often.
“Lando, Hi!” I smile back as he slides beside me and presses our floor.
“You need help?” He eyes the bags as I bite my lip, not wanting to bother him. I don’t have the time to respond because he takes three bags out of my hands like it’s nothing.
“Thank you.” I sigh, “I’ve been struggling for like two blocks.” He laughs a bit with me as the numbers get higher and higher.
“I’m happy to help.” We finally reach our floor, Lando watches me go first and walk to my door, unlocking it and walking in.
Lando follows hesitantly, like he doesn’t know if he’s allowed.
“Thank you again! I put myself in a bit of a bind when I decided that my friends need fifteen types of salami and cheese.” I place the bags on the counter, Lando following.
I push back my hair and suddenly wish I had cleaned up a bit more. My friends are coming over tonight and I had decided to push back my cleaning. Looking around at the clothes and old popcorn bowls scattered around makes me want to slap myself.
“Really, I like to lend a hand! I never get to be neighborly.” He shrugs.
“What do you do for work? If you don’t mind me asking?” I start placing the cold items in the freezer.
He leans against the counter, his arms holding him up and looking alarmingly fit, “Uh… You ever follow Formula 1?”
I nod, “Kinda? I used to love it!” My mom and I would watch every sunday but I stopped in college so I don’t know any of the current grid, “So you work in the sport! That’s cool, pretty hands on?” I ask as he laughs a bit, looking awkward.
“Yeah, I work with the cars.” He looks around my place a bit, “So, why does one need this much food? I’m judging or anything it’s just… You don’t seem like the type to need a jumbo sized pretzel bag.”
I smile and snatch the bag from him, “I could definitely eat all of this by the way! But I'm having a bit of a party tonight. If anything’s too loud just let me know! It’s just old friends from college- actually.” I look up at him, a boost of confidence appearing in me, “You could join us. If you’re not busy.”
It suddenly sounds like a ridiculously stupid idea. I turn back to the fridge, placing a bottle of lemonade in it and cringing.
“I would love to.” I let out a sigh of relief, “But I've got plans…” I frown and turn back to him, finally putting away the last of my groceries.
“Aw.”
“It’s really nice of you to invite me.” I smile, a bit sad and confused why I'm disappointed. I mean I barely know the man. “What do you do for work?”
I lean against the counter so I'm across from him, “I’m a writer. Journalism right now but I really want to take a more bookish route…”
He genuinely looks so intrigued, more interested than anyone else who I've told I write articles about neighborhood drama.
He checks his watch, which I'm now realizing is incredibly expensive, and swears, “I gotta go. Have fun with your party tonight.”
⋆。‧˚⋆
I definitely do have fun. My friends and I eat, drink, and play board games just like we’re back in dorms. I’m seeing my last and closest friend off when Lando comes up the hallway, As my friend's eyes go wide when she sees him, I shake my head.
“Goodbye!” I push her out of my apartment, “Love you!”
“Yeah love you too! Text me!” She walks past Lando, nodding at him before she turns behind his back and mouths ‘he’s hot’.
I roll my eyes at her, a smile still on my face as Lando looks at me. He’s in a full suit, holding his blazer in his hand.
“Fun time then?” God he’s hot!
“Absolutely!” I giggle, a bit tipsy, “How about you then?” I eye his suit.
“As good as I could make it.”
I slap my hand over my mouth, “God you aren’t coming from a funeral then, are you?”
He laughs at this, “No! No. A work banquet thing.”
I giggle a bit as he turns to his door, “Hey!” I say without thinking, “Would you want to come in? I have wine.”
He’s sitting on my couch thirty minutes later, a glass deep and talking about where he’s traveled too.
“That’s my dream!” I say, my feet tucked under myself as I tilt my head on the couch cushions, “Traveling. I mean- You’ve been everywhere!”
He shrugs, sipping his wine, his tie undone and shoes off, “It’s amazing but I'm not there for long so I don’t usually get to sightsee much. Honestly the most interesting thing that’s happened to me recently is this pretty girl came to save my baking disaster.”
I hum to his words, blushing a bit, “Sounds like a hero if i’ve ever heard one.” We both go silent, taking pieces of my leftover charcuterie board. “Should I start watching F1?”
“No!” He says it so quick that i’m taken aback.
“No?”
He laughs a bit, shaking it off, “It’s boring. I can’t have someone else in my life talk about it.”
I spin my wine around in the glass, “So I'm someone in your life now?”
He smirks, “We’re friends, aren’t we?”
I pretend to contemplate this, “I’ve never had a friend who hasn’t gone to the strawberry market with me.”
He makes an odd face, “So we must go then.”
I sigh, “If you want to be my friend…”
The corner of his mouth pulls, “Tomorrow at 9?”
⋆。‧˚⋆
He’s at my door at 9:12. Thank god he’s late because I hop over to the door, pulling on my shoe and pulling down my jean skirt.
I open the door and stand up straight, smiling breathlessly. He, of course, looks perfect in jeans and an olive green shirt, “Morning.”
“Ready to taste the best strawberries you’ve ever had?” I grab my bag and keys.
“So ready.”
We make it to the market just on time. It’s my favorite neighborhood gem. Every Sunday people gather with strawberries. There are big and small, some covered in chocolate and some in honey.
I buy a box of chocolate ones, well Lando does. He insists that he still owes me. Handing one to Lando with an extra fork, he bites into it, his eyes roll, “Fucking hell.” I nod, excited that he likes them as much as I do.
“My favorite treat! Something you can’t burn your house down with.” I eye him and he eyes me right back. Being with Lando is like a breath of fresh air. I’ve never been so confident in my social skills.
He laughs with a shop owner as he buys his pack of plain strawberries. He's so nice and just listens politely as the woman goes on and on about her childhood on a strawberry farm.
He gives her a bigger bill than necessary and as she insists it’s too much, he just shakes his head and continues walking.
We settle at a park bench nearby, tasting all the pieces we’ve bought, “This is genuinely phenomenal.” He says while eating another, “How’d you find this place?”
“Had to write about something local and had total writers block… I was walking around one day and just sort of stumbled upon it.”
He smiles, I really like this smile. “You seem like the type to just stumble upon a strawberry market.”
I laugh, covering my mouth, “What does that even mean?”
“You’re just so…” His hands make these weird gestures, his fingers moving around as he laughs and gives up, “It just fits.”
I smile, meeting his eyes. They're so nice, a mix of blue and green. His gaze washes over me and I feel the need to smile even more.
“You’ve got nice eyes.” My stomach twists as he says it so calmly, “Real pretty.” I feel a blush on my cheeks and I turn away from him, looking at the park near us and being startled by the child looking up at us.
Lando follows my gaze, mumbling softly, “Shit.”
“Hi.” The kid says awestruck, I look to Lando who’s smiling and sitting up straighter. “Um- Are you Lando Norris?”
Lando scratches the back of his neck, “Yeah I am! What's your name?”
“W-William!” He says, swallowing and pulling a pen from behind his back, “Could you sign this?” I glance to what looks like his mother, she’s watching him with a smile.
Lando simply nods and takes the cap from his head, its bright orange. He signs his name and messes up the kid's hair, “Thanks a lot! My friends’ll never believe it!” The boy squeals and runs back to his mom who waves slightly and takes the boy's hand.
I raise a brow at Lando, still confused, “I’m sorry…” He looks embarrassed but I don’t even know what for.
“I’m going to assume you didn’t tell me the whole truth in what your job is?”
His cheeks get a bit red, “I do work with the cars… Just really close. Like I’m in them. One specifically.”
I nod, “Yours?”
“Mine.” He crosses his arms, his lips in a thin line, “I drive for McLaren.” I breathe out.
“Oh.” I can’t help but think I have a type because I grew up with Jenson Button posters on my wall.
He runs a hand through his curls, “I don’t usually get recognized around here- Thought we would be okay.”
“We are okay!” I reassure him, realizing he’s actually embarrassed, “That was sweet.”
He looks up hopefully, “You think? I’m sorry for lying- I just really liked that you didn’t know who I am or what I do.”
“Well, I sort of still don't. I know your full name now, that’s about it.” He smiles at this, I bite into another strawberry.
“Do you want to go out with me?”
He is yet to say something I'm not shocked at.
“Yeah.” I nod, smiling at him as he grins, “I’d really like that. Don’t you have to race soon though…? Singapore, isn’t it?”
The smirk that pulls at his lips is just plain mischievous, “I never said the date would be here.”
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theaceace · 5 months
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sorry but I just keep getting stuck on the way Charles sees himself and the skills that he's cultivated and values in himself, and the fact that at no point does he ever seem to consider himself smart or capable in any way that isn't physical?
Like his backpack, that Edwin fully admits to being unable to use and took Charles years of practice, but Charles just shrugs off? It's a pocket universe that he navigates with no problem, how did he learn to do that, did he have to teach himself? He seems to have a fantastic memory for their past cases, and he so easily keeps up with Edwins technical talk on multiple occasions. He went to a fancy boarding school, and I know we aren't really given any information on how he did there academically but i can't help but think that if he was struggling then he would have brought it up as another thing he couldn't do right in his dad's eyes.
This boy traversed hell with nothing but a journal a lantern and the stories he remembered from his best friend offered over 30 years, and you want me to believe he's stupid
I dunno, every time he writes himself off as just the brawn of the duo who doesn't offer anything more to the agency, I want to shake his sweet self-deprecating face
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honeytonedhottie · 2 months
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lessons in protecting ur peace⋆.ೃ࿔*:・🛍️
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after reading the book pyscho cybernetics something that rly stuck out to me was that literally EVERYTHING IS UR MIND. and duh, thats what i've primarily based my blog on…💬🎀
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but i wanted to talk about the idea that everything that u experience is because of ur mind and that goes into how you interpret things as well. so lets talk about how u can protect ur peace through ur reactions.
CAN WE NOT? ;
first, lets remember that everyone experiences the world differently and reacts to things differently from each other. based on subconscious belief, self concept, upbringing, trauma etc. therefore everyones perception of things is shaped by their own unique brain.
for example lets imagine that theres a rly pretty girl and shes rly sweet. the people around her have an idea in their mind that pretty girls are stuck up and mean, so they look for reasons to categorize her and prove themselves right. they look for ways to make her fit into the narrative that they've fed themselves…💬🎀
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i give this example to show that peoples judgement of u is based more on them and their subconscious beliefs more then it is about you. period. someone else's problem with u isnt ur business. when u persist in a belief whether its consciously or subconsciously your reality will prove you right. your literally manifesting a belief that doesnt serve you so can we not?
PROTECT UR PEACE BY NOT TAKING THINGS PERSONALLY ;
taking things personally means, misinterpreting someone's thoughts/actions and believing them to be targeted toward us personally…💬🎀
this is particularly dangerous to our peace because when u take things personally you'll start to adopt what other people tell u about urself as fact. if someone calls u dumb then ur gonna believe them and think that something is wrong with you when that isnt the case.
if u know that ur actually rly intelligent and someone tells u that ur dumb, you won't care because you know that ur smart and you know that they're just projecting their beliefs unto you. you make the facts about you. not others.
YOU DECIDE THE FACTS ;
for a fun journal exercise i want you to write down the facts about yourself (u can also write down new traits that you'd like to manifest and make fact about urself) so open ur diary to a fresh page and write an about-me page. fill the page with positive facts about urself and who you are. these are the facts and if someone tells u otherwise, fact check em.
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BE GENEROUS ;
people spew some crazy shit when they dont like you or are envious of you and the best way to respond is to first, not respond at all because they dont even deserve to get a reaction out of you. but if ur lowkey petty, add onto their accusations to make them look dumber.
like if they try to clock you about something and accuse u of something, make the accusation WORSE. ofc with nuance but have some fun with it sometimes.
people can't shame you for made up accusations if u dont care and if ur living in ur truth and therefore their agenda to try and bring u down to make themselves feel better is ultimately squashed. dont waste ur energy arguing with people and just keep that peace protected.
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steddieas-shegoes · 3 months
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does he always do this?
for @corrodedcoffinfest prompt 'heard it in a love song'
rated m | 995 words | cw: mentions of sex | tags: everyone loves steve, but eddie loves steve like a love song, steddie, corroded coffin friendship
🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸
Eddie tapped his pencil against the journal, checking the clock above the phone in the kitchen for the hundredth time in the last 30 minutes.
Steve was late.
Steve was never late.
He was only minutes away from trying to call his house to make sure he didn't forget he was coming over when he heard a car pull up out front.
"Finally," he said to himself, throwing the pencil down and pushing the chair away from the table.
He went to open the door and was shocked to find not just Steve, but his entire band as well.
"Uh…hi?" Eddie watched as they all grabbed backpacks from Steve's car. "What's happening right now? Is it an intervention? I don't even drink."
Steve rolled his eyes as he got closer and kissed the corner of Eddie's mouth.
"The guys are here to help with the song."
"What song? There's no song," Eddie panicked. It was supposed to be a secret, dammit. He'd been so careful.
"The song you've been writing for me that you're having trouble with. You've been distracted for days and I want my boyfriend back," Steve pushed past him and into the kitchen, opening the fridge to start grabbing random things Eddie didn't even know they had.
"Hey Eddie," Jeff and Frankie said in unison as they pushed past him and set their bags on the floor inside.
"Hey, man," Gareth said as he did the same.
"Who told him about the song?" Eddie hissed as Steve made himself busy pulling a pan out of the cabinet.
"No one. You left your journal wide open on your desk and he saw it when he was getting ready for work," Jeff rolled his eyes. "We told you to keep your stuff hidden."
"I thought you were just being assholes about Steve being my boyfriend!" Eddie threw his hands up in frustration. This was bullshit. He could get the song done on his own!
"Anyone allergic to anything?" Steve called out from the counter, where a variety of peppers, onions, and garlic were spread out to be cut.
"I'm allergic to vegetables," Gareth smirked.
"Right. I'm sure," Steve didn't even entertain his comment, continuing to cut up the food in front of him. "Dinner will be ready in 45 minutes."
"Does he always just come in here and start cooking?" Frankie asked from his spot on the couch. He sure made himself comfy fast.
"Only if he knows I haven't eaten much."
"How does he know that?" Jeff asked as he settled in Wayne's chair.
"His hands are shaking because his sugar's low and he has six empty cans of Mountain Dew on the table, meaning he hasn't gotten up from the table for hours. Focus on the song, pretend I'm not here."
Eddie smiled fondly at Steve, only turning back to everyone when Gareth clapped his hands in his face.
"Dude, you're so fucked."
Eddie groaned. "Yeah, well, the song has me fucked up worse."
"What have you got so far?" Frankie asked.
Eddie got up to grab the journal from the table and threw it to him. Frankie read the few lines and nodded, smirking.
"This isn't a love song."
"What do you mean? Of course it's a love song!"
"Dude, this is a sex song."
"It is not!"
Jeff grabbed the journal and read the lines, his eyes widening momentarily before handing it over to Gareth.
"Damn, this is a sex song."
"You writing dirty things about me, baby?" Steve asked from his spot at the counter.
Eddie covered his face with his hands and groaned. "I wasn't trying to."
"Alright, so do you wanna shift gears and try to focus more on love or do you wanna stick with this?" Jeff asked, getting down to business. He was good at keeping them on track.
"Stick with this."
They sat around figuring out lines that could work, and Steve stood at the stove listening, but keeping to himself.
He ignored the teasing Eddie received when he admitted to wanting to see Steve in only his vest, but smiled to himself when he remembered the first time he'd worn only the vest while Eddie fucked him against his bedroom wall.
He ignored how red Eddie got when they tried to rewrite the line about "seeing white on red", saying it didn't make sense. Maybe to them it didn't, but all Steve could picture was when Eddie's cum painted his ass, bright red from the spanking Eddie'd given him.
They luckily didn't talk much about it over dinner, too busy shoving the food into their mouths to say anything.
After dinner, Steve cleaned up while they got back to it, then went to take a shower and get ready for bed. They might stay up all night writing, but he sure wouldn't be awake for much longer.
Eddie snuck into the bathroom while he was rinsing his hair, sitting on the sink and asking about his day.
When Steve got out of the shower, he wrapped his towel around his waist and stood in between Eddie's legs, cupping his face in his hands.
"You love me?" Steve asked, the same way he did every night.
"More than anything in the world, Stevie," Eddie answered, the same way he did every night.
"How's the song?"
"It's…our sex life. Kinda out in the open. Is that okay?"
Steve smirked. "Yeah."
"It's not really a love song."
"Sure it is. You love me, you fuck me. It's all the same," Steve kissed his lips softly, smiling into it. "Can't wait to hear when it's done."
"I could sing it to you tonight," Eddie wrapped his arms around him.
"Hey!" Gareth banged on the door. "No fucking while we're here!"
They both laughed.
"Better get back to it," Steve kissed him again before opening the door and walking to the bedroom.
Eddie watched him go, biting his lip.
"I've got the chorus," he yelled to the guys.
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freakassfemme · 1 month
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chronically offline abby headcannons ✧˖*°
she is coping so well and thriving. i said i could fix her and i did
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heyyyy so this is sort of kind of low-key a little bit of a continuation on beloved butch abby, the premise of the au and personality is the same. i got a request asking for more and i was thinking about this anyways and thought they worked well together
♫ above the chinese restaurant (laufey)
ೃ༄ abby is (unfortunately) a retired soldier, she's got a kid to look after, she runs a cafe downtown and she's got two dogs. all at like, 22. did we really think she has the time to go online for anything more than 🔍 thirty minute dinner recipes your vegan teenager isn't going to kill you over
ೃ༄ just kidding. she doesn't mind lev trying out new things lol. he is her whole fucking world, she's more than happy to spend time with him cooking something he remembers from home, giving each other grossed out faces when they fuck up the tofu again, and giving up and going to target 15 minutes before close to piece together some random junk food.
Manny will come over and cook with them sometimes, and that's always a fun time. he's got abby drunk before nine and she's just a laughing mess.
ೃ༄ she just loves being around Manny in general. they meet up for lunch a lot, go on runs together in the morning, work on each other's trucks, etc.,
now that she's living a normal life, she's able to take a serious Spanish class, and he's very supportive about it.
ೃ༄ definitely takes the dogs into the cafe with her. whenever someone complains about the pandora radio she puts on, she blames it on the dogs.
yeah she uses pandora until someone teaches her what Spotify is
ೃ༄ she's such a planner. she's got a huge chalkboard in the kitchen for the week and the month with both of their schedules drawn on it down to the hour if needed. hers is written in orange and lev's is written in green.
only watches tv once a week, and it's for a designated show that's so laid back, like the great British baking show.
"do you want to watch this show?" "no it's not Sunday"
ೃ༄ she's definitely the type to limit screen time, and lev himself isn't like partial to brain rot, but sometimes he says something that has her turning around like what did you just say eyes wide and everything
lev tells her to touch grass one day and she goes on a hike
ೃ༄ her favorite evening activities are taking the dogs on a sunset walk with lev, and then when lev's gone up to his room for the night, she will pack him like a little bento-type lunch. she'll cozy up in her lazy boy by the fireplace with Alice at her feet and journal away, sometimes until she falls asleep.
she's got BUCKETS of journals. it started in therapy after her dad passed, as like a coping mechanism to at least attempt to correct her thought processes, and it's always stuck. it's always made her feel like she's putting herself in order again.
after therapy, i feel like abby spent a lot of time thinking about religion. she never really found anything that clicks, but she reads a lot about buddhism and really appreciates the perspective.
ೃ༄ definitely has a weird phone setup going on. she's either got a really old like iPhone 7 with maybe 6 apps on it or one of those CAT flip phones lol. can you imagine flip phone selfies from her
ೃ༄ writes her grocery lists on a little piece of yellow paper that she'll tuck into her front pocket. carries specifically one of those bic ballpoint pens, has like 5 year old reusable grocery bags and a keychain for her Aldi quarter that she thinks is so clever and fun.
she definitely uses one of her favorite coins from her collection as her Aldi quarter.
ೃ༄ gets the paper delivered to her house. she prefers to read it that way, but she pays for lev to get a digital subscription to his kindle or something
ೃ༄ keeps her dads beat up, decaying quilt as a topper for her bed. she folds it up neatly every night and sets it in a rocking chair in the corner of her room, just to preserve it a little longer.
ೃ༄ knows how to get throughout almost the entire west coast without a map or gps or anything
ೃ༄ reading is HUGE in her house. lev's reading log was NEVER forged not once. she spent a whole summer building ceiling to floor bookshelves with a gorgeous trim and a mahogany stain. she loves to swing by the used bookstore after work every once in a while, the one where she can get a book for 25 cents or a big bag of them for two bucks.
every birthday, lev gives her a bag of books, and he always puts one in that he loves but isn't sure she will like. it's usually not her style, but she likes learning more about his interests and she thinks they're always very sweet books.
always secretly surprises lev with little books with transmasc characters or about real trans people. she will just leave them on his desk in their shared office or something with a little sticky note with a heart on it
ೃ༄ makes friends with the lanky manager of the record store with a weird fucked up tattoo when she's looking for more cassettes for her beat up truck.
"dude, you're the only person who has looked through this crate in like, six months. you can just take what you want."
"holy shit, really? it's the only thing i can play in my truck besides the radio."
"jesus, that's kind of funny. yeah, anytime you want, you can use my shit to make your little mixtapes. if I'm not here, just tell them Ellie said so."
ೃ༄ is definitely an active member of her local library, not only for reading material, but to check out music, and she loves to participate in the chess and book clubs.
really loves board games in general.
ೃ༄ I feel like abby loves Birkenstocks, but the clogs. she has a pair of sandals for the summer, but in my heart I know she's a clog girly.
ೃ༄ very simple, very minimalist wardrobe. I feel like she exclusively sticks to Levi's for jeans, and then she has like 8 black tee shirts and some thrifted sweatshirts and tee shirts.
would very much adore though if her girlfriend crocheted her a hat or a scarf or something <3
ೃ༄ speaking of girlfriends, I feel like abby really goes for opposites attract. she's so mild in appearance, that she loves someone that's a little over the top. maybe a little frilly, or adds odd little details to their outfits. she loves funky hairstyles and creativity in women.
ೃ༄ she loves making her own coffee. working at the cafe wasn't just convenience for her, abby loves the slowness of it. she loves packing the espresso, she loves checking on her sourdough every morning, she loved crafting her own tea blends. she definitely has a beat up metal French press, but she probably invests in her own espresso machine to keep at home too.
ೃ༄ i feel like eventually abby would coach for a sports team at lev's school. maybe he joined gymnastics or like, made the soccer team, and abby's packing-coolers-full-for-the-team and carpooling and excessive volunteering eventually takes her to leading after school drills and a best coach ever mug for the middle school boys soccer team lol.
this OR she becomes one of the most active parents any GSA has ever known to mankind
joins the pta
ೃ༄ is SO sentimental. has photos of people she loves all over the walls of her house, keeps tickets from movies and cuts out bits from the newspaper to keep in a little shoebox under her bed. she keeps her dad's medical journals and research on a special shelf above the fireplace.
her little flip hone has a blurry picture of her and Manny in the background
ೃ༄ Abby texts and types like this. She is a very formal typist. She will become very confused if someone texts her in lowercase or without punctuation.
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strawburry01 · 1 month
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The Scientist
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Ford Pines x Fem! Reader
Summary: Bill disrupts a wedding
Word Count: 3k
A/N: I highly recommend reading all previous parts before this for maximum oof-age. I hope you enjoy and I'm sorry I get great satisfaction from writing unhappy things. 500 likes and I'll write their happy ending.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 2.5
It had been a few years since you and Ford moved to Gravity Falls now. You finally moved from your ramshackle cabin into a cozy wooden A-Frame (you insisted on an A-Frame as you always loved the way they looked). Ford and you had worked on building a deep lab in the basement in order to keep it safe from the random storms and power outages, while you kept your growing photography and videography library upstairs. You collected random antiques from stores and sidewalks to add to the house to make it feel a little more lived in. Ford chuckled as he watched you perfectly balance an ornate hourglass you had bought on top of a jammed globe. Satisfied you brushed the dust off your hands and stepped besides Ford to look at your growing mantelpiece.
“I’m thinking about going into interior design if this whole cryptid hunting stuff doesn’t work out,” you grinned. Ford scoffed and put an arm around your waist to pull you closer.
“The whole cryptid hunting stuff is going fine though. I’m just having a bit of a plateau,” he mumbled as he kissed your head. You cleared your throat. “We- we’re having a bit of a plateau,” he quickly corrected himself, his face turning red. 
It was true, the hunting had been stalling a little bit. Ford’s focus had turned from recording these anomalies to trying to track where it was all exactly coming from. It was the real scientist in him needing to know where everything was coming from. On the opposite side was you, who was content to continue trying to get better pictures, better recordings, better visuals of these anomalies. Oftentimes you’d tape or clip pictures into Ford’s journals as you got better so they didn’t just have his scribbles to describe the beasts. You were happy for once in your life, you felt content living with the love of your life in a beautiful, albeit spooky, little town. You were pretty sure Ford felt the same way, if he ever let himself feel accomplished, rather than just continuing to pine over the next question and torturing himself over the solutions.
A few weeks later you woke up groggily checking the alarm. Ford had just slammed the front door and was stumbling back into the house. It was 3:00 am. 
“Hon?” you shouted out as you sat up in your shared bed. You heard him pause and slowly walk to the bedroom door. He stood in the doorway, staring at you for a second too long until shaking his head and snapping back.
“Hey, sorry about that dear, I um-” he said as he slid his shoes and coat off onto the ground, “guess I lost track of time in the cave I was exploring,”. He huffed and thumped into bed besides you as you went back under the covers.
“Are you sure?” you asked, as you carefully took his glasses off his face and set them on the nightstand.
“Mmmm, positive,” he said without hesitation as he traced along your arm with his eyes closed.
“Alright. Sleep well hon,” you said as you kissed his forehead and fell back into your own sleep.
Unfortunately he wasn’t quite the same after that night. He started spending longer hours in the basement. He started staring off into space noticeably more. And strangest of all he was talking to himself more. He was still the same Ford to you though, always snapping out of whatever trance he wrapped himself up into, and he was always endlessly grateful whenever you’d bring coffee or lunch down to him. He seemed revitalized in a sense though, so you didn’t want to discourage his new quirks. You finally did crack and force him to tell you what was happening when you caught him calling Fiddleford McGuckett one day.
“Stanford Pines you haven’t talked to that man since we left Backupsmore! What in the hell is going on?” you demanded with crossed arms as he hung up the phone. He opened his mouth and tried to start a sentence a few times. 
“I’m building a portal,” he finally stammered out. You raised an eyebrow. There were a few random metal supports and debris cluttered in the lab basement, but you had no inkling that’s what it was going to be used for.
“What kind…of portal?” you continued, unmoving. Ford awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and looked away again. 
“I’ve been consulting with someone. They said it would explain all the weirdness and strangeness of Gravity Falls,” he said. The room got cold when he said it.
“Who are you consulting Ford,” you asked again, trying not to overthink the way it really did feel like there was another person in the room now. 
“It was a deal. With someone, well, something, named Bill Cipher. He’s helping me with all of this. He’s a being from centuries ago, and that’s all I can really say,” he sighed, looking back at you, realizing how unsure of all of this you were. He stepped forward and held your hands in his. “I promise, it’s all okay dear. I’m being safe. This portal is what will put our names in the history books,” he said with a gentle squeeze. You looked up into his eyes and could see hope and excitement for the first time in a long time. 
“Okay…” you sighed with a small smile. Ford wrapped you into a hug and you laughed at him slightly crushing you. “Okay, okay, okay, just let me know what I can do to help huh?” you laughed with a sigh as Ford began rambling off all the next steps. 
Later that night you sat in your dark room, listening to the assorted thumps and sizzles from the basement. You could hear Ford talking to whoever this Bill person was. His high pitched shrieking of a voice was hard to miss. But you knew if you went downstairs there wouldn’t be anyone but Ford. You’d tried to catch Bill before, but to no avail. He always zapped out of existence whenever you would turn the corner. 
“Stupid to be jealous of a fuckin’ triangle,” you mumbled to yourself as you finished a glass of wine. You knew that much. That it was some sort of manic triangle. Ford had shown you that much in his journal. You walked down to your kitchen and left the glass in the sink.
“Ford! I’m going to bed!” you shouted down the stairs into the basement. You heard him scuffle and quickly run up the stairs. Your heart melted as he held your face and kissed you. 
“I’ll be there soon dearest,” he smiled. You smiled back and nodded. You were just overthinking everything. It was all going to be okay.
Fiddleford showed up a few days later and started joining Ford in the basement for long hours. Bill’s voice disappeared which was a nice break, and it was pleasant getting to talk to Fiddleford again after so many years. You would make dinner (or more often pick it up from some restaurant) and force the guys to come up and eat with you at the table. It was like you were all back in university. 
“So how long until there’s a mini Ford running around?” Fiddleford asked one night when you all decided to get into the liquor cabinet. Fiddleford was laying on the carpet, staring up at the ceiling, with you and Ford draped over the couch. Both of you reddened and avoided eye contact, unable to think of what to say.
“Well I’ve always thought I’d want to get married first,” you said, breaking the silence, “so the dress would fit, obviously,” you drunkenly giggled. Ford absentmindedly placed a hand on your knee and laughed as he took another swig of his drink. You two had talked about marriage once. Near the beginning of your relationship. You both had poor representations of marriage at your respective homes, which made you both hesitant of commitment to that scale, but you agreed to play it by ear. 4 years later you were still playing it by ear.
“What’re you WAITING FOR FORD,” Fiddleford drunkenly shouted from the floor, “We don’t have all day!” he declared before passing out in snores on the floor. You laughed and laid your head on Ford’s shoulder.
“He hasn’t changed much,” you giggled. 
“His tolerance hasn’t gotten much better either,” Ford remarked. You two both sat in silence listening to the hum of the generators. “Are you good dear?” he asked, obviously referencing Fiddleford’s outbursts.
“Yes love,” you sighed, as you closed your eyes.
It was another average drizzly pacific northwest day when shit hit the fan. You were sitting on the porch taking pictures of a deer nearby eating from a brush when the ground underneath you shook. You were used to random earthly shakings but Fiddleford quickly stormed out shortly after. 
“Fiddleford what’s-” you tried to ask as you stood up to follow after him. 
“Do NOT trust him!” he shouted as he threw open his car door, “That portal is nothing but pure evil Y/N. Get out of here while you still can,” he said with a furrowed brow before peeling away in his car. You stood in stunned silence as Ford threw the door open a few seconds later. He let out a defeated sigh as he saw Fiddleford driving away.
“What the hell did you do?!” you asked under your breath, not looking over.
“I-I don’t know,” Ford said, “he got sucked into the portal…and saw something,”.
“You’d tell me if we were in danger, right Ford?” you asked, as you finally looked over at him. He nodded silently. 
“I won’t let anything happen to you,” he stated, “I’m not working with Bill anymore. It’s not worth it,” he sighed as he sat on the porch and held his head in his hands. “I got blinded by the potential for fame. It’s not worth losing my friends and love over,” he said softly. You sat down beside him and put an arm around his shoulder, pulling him closer. He wrapped his arms around your waist and the two of you sat still as the rain pattered around you. You never told him but you could feel him crying, just a little. 
Ford quickly began installing precautions to keep Bill out. He insisted on installing a plethora of metal plates around the house. He kept trying to convince you to get a metal plate installed in your head but you were able to convince him you weren’t in danger. You’d never seen Bill before. The rain turned into spring and flowers began to blossom around the yard. 
One day you were out picking them to make a bouquet for the dining table with Ford watching you on the porch. He was back to where he had been before meeting Bill, but he seemed more content. Outwardly at least. He read more, and criticized himself less. He was taking a break from reading when he saw you standing in the field picking flowers and kneeling by every animal you saw to say hello to it. At that moment he realized.
“Can we get married?” he asked, when you came back to the porch. You nearly fell backwards before jumping into Ford’s lap, knocking off his book, and smothering him in kisses.
“Of course we can Ford,” you said through your kisses.
It was a short turnaround. The next week Ford had found his suit and you had gotten a wedding dress from town. It was long and flowing and got Ford’s approval for having renaissance-esque sleeves and details, which made you roll your eyes a little. You two didn’t know anyone else in town well enough to invite them to a ceremony, and neither of you wanted to invite family. Ford felt guilty about having nobody so he invited the colony of gnomes in exchange for hors d’oeuvres. So that’s what was determined. You were able to scrounge up enough random chairs to have a few spots for them to sit with you and Ford facing each other in front. You had done your makeup and hair, which was the first time Ford had ever really seen you try to do something with your hair which left him slack jawed. All of the gnomes also oohed and awed when you stepped out. You smiled when you faced Ford. The two of you agreed to exchange vows and then you’d sign the marriage certificate and turn it in the next day at the courthouse. 
You bit your lip and opened your mouth to start when the ground shook and the string lights you had hung up went out. The power inside the house went out entirely. 
“Peculiar,” Ford said under his breath. 
“Just a moment folks, we’ll be right back after a few messages,” you said, trying to keep the crowd happy, “take a snack break,” you said, gesturing to the table of random snacks you’d gotten for them all. 
“I can turn the breaker back on downstairs,” Ford said as he stepped into the house.
“Here I think I have the flashlight,” you said as you thumped the flashlight you kept in the utensil drawer. It flickered to life. Ford took a second and nodded. The two of you made your way downstairs to the lab basement, Ford supplying a six-fingered hand to hold to make sure you didn’t trip. 
Once downstairs it was obvious that something was wrong. The portal was still up and whirring. A haze of blue swirls in its center.
“Ford I thought you turned this off,” you said.
“I couldn’t just- turn it off,” he mumbled under his breath rubbing the back of his neck, “it’s been months of work. I figured leaving it running and able to be returned to would be…fine,” he said sheepishly. You chewed the inside of your cheek, looking at it. He had a point, but it was also a memento to losing his dearest friend. Research be damned.
“Ford, I need to know you’re looking to the future and not staying in the past if we get married,” you said, feeling guilty about the ultimatum, but knowing it was the only way. He pushed up his glasses and nodded.
“You’re right,” he said, “besides, there’ll be something better than this piece of junk,”. He pushed the button on a platform and the portal quickly fizzled and closed in on itself, leaving the room engulfed in darkness for a second before the lights flickered back on overhead. 
“Hey look at that,” you remarked, looking up, “bet our electricity bill is about to get a lot lower mister,” you smirked as you tapped Ford’s chest.
“Stanford, you didn’t tell me she had a sense of humor!” a sickeningly familiar voice said. Ford quickly pushed you behind him as you both turned to see the floating triangle form of Bill Cipher in the air. It was your first time seeing the thing that had taken up so much of Ford’s time.
“Bill, why are you here? The deal’s off,” Ford shouted.
“I can’t believe I didn’t get an invite to the wedding! Keeping it intimate with just friends and family I see,” Bill continued on his own as his eye contorted into a video of the gnomes outside waiting.
“Answer the question Bill,” Ford demanded. You hadn’t seen him ever get this serious. 
“Well Fordsy you broke our deal, but don’t worry, there’s a way to get it back on track!” Bill’s voice pinged through the basement, “Y’see, you take something I love-” he said, blinking into the now empty space of the portal. You gripped Ford’s forearm.
“Ford I’m scared-” you said softly.
“I think it’s only fair if I take something you love,” Bill chirped, appearing in front of you two again.
“Don’t you dare Bill,” Ford shouted as he held your hand. 
“Not convincing! Boop!” Bill’s voice pinged and with that, you were gone. 
One moment you were on Earth, in your universe, and the next thing you knew you were falling through space and time, seeing eons of other planets pass by as you floated through free fall. 
After what felt like decades of falling through nothingness, but also everything, you slammed into the dirt of an apocalyptic planet. You grunted as you lifted yourself up, seeing the smoky, forgotten landscape stretch out in front of you. 
Fuck.
Back in the basement, millions of universes and timelines away, Ford screamed at Bill. 
“What did you do to her?!”.
“I evened the deal, Stanford calm down!” Bill responded, rolling his single eye, “besides she was getting in the way of your work, you should be thanking me,”. 
After that, Ford’s world changed. He installed a metal plate in his head to keep Bill out for good and got serious about trying to hide how to reinstall the portal. He hid his journals throughout the town and decided to call his brother to properly take care of the last one. Take it so far that nobody would ever find it. He’d get you back on his own. He’d figure it out. He just couldn’t let Bill ever get the satisfaction of the portal. 
There was a knock on the door and Ford kicked it open, crossbow aimed. It was his brother. He breathed out a sigh of relief and dragged him in.
“Damn what happened to this place? What happened to your woman Ford?” Stan asked, looking around the now cluttered house.
“He took my wife, and I need to make sure he doesn’t take anything else from anyone else,” Ford muttered, “listen there isn’t much time and I’ve made a huge mistake. I don’t know who I can trust anymore,”.
“Hey easy there let’s talk this through okay?” Stan said as he looked around the house, slowly realizing his brother may be crazy.
“I have something to show you. Something you won’t believe,” Ford sighed as he turned to face his brother.
“Look, I’ve been around the world okay? Whatever you’re going to show me I’ll understand,” Stan shrugged.
It was safe to say Stan did not understand. And Stan did not understand when Ford shoved the journal into his chest demanding his brother to take it to the ends of the earth to hide. 
It was safe to say that you and Ford were both tumbling through endless dimensions together, but also so far apart.
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heavenlymorals · 4 months
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Details I've noticed about Arthur Morgan Part 2 cuz you guys seem to be devouring the first one 👍🏼 :
- Him and Dutch share the same sense of humor- dry, sarcastic, and usually at another's expense.
- However, both Arthur and Dutch get really annoyed whenever they direct that same humor to eachother.
-When Dutch and Arthur quick draw, they both turn their bodies to make them a smaller target. They are the only ones in the gang that do this in idle animation.
- Arthur's journal is filled with many half done, not fully rendered drawings. Some pages have one small drawing on them and are then skipped over. Other drawings are just shapes and strokes that represent the schema of an animal or person. It's very realistic to an actual sketchbook and not the Pinterest dream sketchbook.
- Arthur, prior to Hosea's death and Micah overturning his position as Dutch's right hand man, is always there whenever a big decision is being there and is asked for feedback too. Arthur isn't just a member of the VDL gang, he's a leader of it too and people seem to forget that.
- Arthur is very emotionally tough and when I mean very, I mean VERY. He doesn't cry when Sean dies, someone he considered like a little brother. He doesn't cry when Lenny dies, someone he probably saw as a son. He doesn't cry when Hosea dies, someone he saw as a father figure. Of course, they were all in high stress situations that could've stopped an emotional reaction, but even later when he can process things, he doesn't cry.
- There is one time in the game where we see Arthur tear up from emotional pain and that is when he speaks to the nun about his life and what he could've had. Still though, he doesn't cry. It says a lot about him.
- In the final journal entry, though, we see a splotch next to the entry on the empty left page that looks like a tear drop. Take that as you will.
- Arthur's hand writing becomes much more spaced out, messy, and words will be scribbled out more often the sicker he gets. Shakey hands.
- He's very witty and quick with insults, like fascinatingly quick.
- He is pretty intelligent but does allow others to dumb him down like Hosea- as the gang's strongman, this could be so the people they work with would put more emphasis on Arthur's strength so he can be more intimidating.
- The picture that Jack gives Arthur has the male figure wearing a black gambler hat like Arthur and John didn't wear a hat in chapter two. Jack probably saw Arthur as his father figure during that point, not John.
- Does want Jack to learn responsibility ("About time you started to earn your keep" "You got to stick at things, Jack") , but he's very kind, patient, and reasonable considering how young the kid was.
- He doesn't let women carry their luggage if he can do it for them (Mary, the nun)
- He's casually mean or teasing to the younger men and generally polite to the women but he will go off on them in the same way if they anger him enough.
- I wish he was a real person
- I'd like to drink a beer with him
- For I love him ❤️
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starsofang · 4 months
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simon riley x autistic!reader requested by anon! <3 tw: NSFW, smut, vaginal fingering, p in v, but all of it's really fluffy
a/n: was originally gonna make this request more of a headshot typa deal but ended up writing 2.7k of fluffy sex with Simon and autistic/virgin reader, so i hope you enjoy anon, and i'm so sorry for the long wait <3
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Simon knew you like the back of his hand. He knew every little quirk, even the ones you weren’t even aware about.
He kept you afloat amongst an unpredictable sea that threatened to consume you and pull you down under. Your head could be its own raging storm, cracking with jolts of thunder that shook your state of mind, yet Simon was the gleam of sunshine poking through the clouds.
That’s how it had been up until this point. Your relationship was a sweet one, filled with fields of flowers and the buzz of bees. It was soft and supple, but lately, there’d been a brewing cloud looming over your colorful paradise,hiding away the rays of light your flowers needed in order to blossom.
Sex. It was the most complex form of intimacy in your mind, and it was why you’d avoided ever doing it like the plague. The turmoil that the mere thought of sex brought you was nerve wracking, nearly throwing you into overdrive.
Simon never asked for it. He seemed perfectly content with the way things were – staying up late to hear your enthusiastic passion that poured from your lips like his favorite bourbon, encouraging your interests with subtle gifts he’d give you when he’d happen to see it passing by, holding you when your mind wasn’t a whirlpool of spitfire that threatened to lash out at you.
He never asked, nor did he seem keen on asking. And that was the issue.
You were curious.
Simon had allowed you to positively be you in all forms. He didn’t define you by your autism, it was simply a chapter in the book about you, while the rest of your story was much more special in his eyes. It wasn’t a setback, nor was it a concern – it was there, and meant to stay.
No matter how supportive he was towards your individuality and your comfort, it didn’t settle the unease of wanting to take the next step, but not knowing how to ask for it.
It festered your mind like a flu until it began to worsen into a burning fever. You kept it bottled up, the feeling of keeping it locked away making your body feel as if it were going to combust.
It didn’t take Simon long to notice. Of course it didn’t. Like said previously, he knew you better than you knew yourself.
“What’s goin’ on in that head of yours, sweetheart?” he asked you when he finally had the chance to sit you down in his room.
The curtains were shut to keep the light out, knowing they irritated you and too much brightness made your eyes squint to the point of an ache. It was quiet apart from the subtle background noise of his TV, plastered with a show you enjoyed watching on nights alone with him. Bits of you were neatly placed around the room, like your journal placed on his desk with your favorite pen carefully set on top of it, or your clothes folded in a tidy pile on one of his shelves he had reserved for you.
“Nothing,” you responded, though Simon knew you enough to detect the lie, even from just one small word.
“You know you can’t hold it in, so talk to me,” he urged, taking a seat next to you from where you sat on the edge of his bed with your hands in your lap. You were picking at the skin around your nails, and like he’d always done, he picked them up into his own hands, soothing his thumbs along the back.
You blinked at him, mouth remaining shut. But the fever was becoming unbearable in your head, scorching you from the insides. You knew you wouldn’t be able to avoid asking him any longer.
“Why don’t we have sex?” you asked, blunt and to the point. His eyebrows raised from beneath his mask, one that he had yet to take off during your relationship. You never pushed since he never pushed you. Both of you had your own oddities, and for him, the mask was it.
“I didn’t think you wanted to,” he confessed, tone remaining calm and soft as he continued to encourage you to speak your mind. “I didn’t want to ask you, sweetheart.”
“Oh.”
You don’t know why you found yourself frowning, but you did, feeling a bit stumped from his answer. He had a point. You’d made no indications on wanting to be more intimate, and Simon’s only ever considered you in your best interest.
“That doesn’t mean I don’t want to,” he rushed to say. “I meant – do you want to?”
You did. The longer you found yourself thinking about it, the more you grew a need to try it. You trusted Simon entirely.
“I’ve never done it.” You felt embarrassed, though unsure why. This was Simon, after all.
“That’s okay,” he assured, giving your hands a squeeze. “Then we don’t have to, yeah?”
“But I want to,” you protested, frowning at him. He huffed out a quiet laugh, fiddling with one of your fingers affectionately.
“That’s okay, too.”
“Is it?”
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
“I don’t know, because I won’t be good, and I’m scared it’ll be too much, then I’ll ruin it by getting overwhelmed, and–”
“Hey,” Simon called out, lifting one of his hands off of yours to cradle your face. You sucked in a breath, exhausted from the rushed flow of panicked words that spilled out, allowing yourself to breathe. “We’ll take it slow, yeah? We’ll do everything at your pace, and the moment you say stop, we stop, no questions asked. I won’t be upset with you, sweetheart, and you certainly wouldn’t ruin it.”
You stared at him while he stared back at you, eyes filled with fondness and love that was only ever reserved for you. They were understanding, assuring, like deep pools of serenity you could float in forever.
“Promise?” you asked, and he laughed again.
“Promise.”
Simon continued to stare at you for a long moment, taking you in, before his hand lifted the bottom of his mask and tugged it over his head, showcasing the entirety of the very man who’d given his all to you. Since it would be your first time making a new step in your relationship, he figured he’d do the same by completely stripping himself of the very thing he wore to hide away.
Rugged and scarred, but beautiful, and you admired it until you surged forward to initiate the first move, like he’d always waited for you to do. He melted into you, cradling your face with tender emotion, pulling you in and calming the nasty sea that flooded your being.
Simon knew exactly how to make you feel safe, while also enjoying yourself. This wasn’t about him, it was about you, and he was absolutely determined to ensure that your first time was comfortable.
He covered the bed in your favorite blanket he kept just for you, soft and fuzzy, much more comfortable than the cotton sheet that always felt a bit too scratchy, even on his own skin. He laid it out for you, encouraging you to take your place.
His fingers were careful as they undressed you, and with every fabric he pulled off of your body, he took off of his own so the state of nudity was matched and you didn’t feel too exposed in comparison to him. He spoke to you with coated sweetness, telling you how proud he was that you told him of your needs, how honored he was that you trusted him to be the one to take you.
Simon took his time. He made no rush or fervent motion, and he allowed you the time to gather yourself if his hands became too much when they mapped out every inch of your skin. Soft and soothing, thumbs brushing along your hips as he waited patiently for you to assure him to continue.
When you were fully exposed to him, he smiled at you fondly, eyes lighting with nothing short of love. He was seeing you for everything you were now, and though for brief moments it was overwhelming to you, he was quick to wash the burden of it away with gentle guides of his hands.
The first finger was uncomfortable, even if he remained careful and slow when prodding you. Your face had mushed up into one of discomfort, and his eyes never left sight of you so he could watch for any indication that it was too much.
You, on the other hand, were both on a cloud of praise from the way he handled you so cautiously, while also free falling from the sky in anxious turmoil. The TV was echoing in your mind, the sounds of chatter causing you to lose focus. Combined with the intimate touches he filled your body with, it was already starting to become too much. You just didn’t know how to express it.
“Hey,” Simon called out to you, easing his finger out of you and instead placing his hand on your hip. “Tell me. What is it? Do you want to stop?”
“No.” You shook your head, letting out an exhale you were holding. “No, just– can you turn off the TV? I can’t– I can’t focus.”
Simon smiled warmly at you, moving without hesitation to shut the television off. The room was quiet now, and you breathed a sigh of relief, your mind finally calming.
“Better?” he asked, and you nodded. “Do you want me to continue, sweetheart?”
“Yes, please.”
Simon gave your hip a comforting squeeze before resuming his previous notions, sliding the pad of his finger along your slit before easing back inside once again. It was only when Simon was sure you could take it that he pressed in a second one, keeping his pace slow and controlled.
Discomfort was turning into pleasure, the feeling so new to you, so foreign. It wasn’t as overstimulating as you thought it would be thus far, but you had Simon there to assure it wouldn’t be.
The feeling of his fingers moving at a steady rhythm, back and forth with the occasional curl of the pads pressing up against your gummy walls, quickly spiraled into something good, something you didn’t hate.
Simon watched you the entire time, and when you gathered the courage to open your eyes and look at him, his smile nearly knocked the air out of your lungs.
“You’re doin’ good, sweetheart,” he praised, and a whimper left your mouth, causing you to squirm shamefully. “No, hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to be quiet around me, you know that, don’t you? Love hearin’ you, always love hearin’ your voice.”
His words caused your breath to quicken at the same time his fingers did, a spark of piping desire and need erupting inside of you, like lava spilling out of a volcano. It filled you to the brim, threatening to explode.
“That’s it, sweet girl. There you go,” he cooed, further urging you to let out any noises you had been holding back.
Before you could revel in the newfound fulfillment, his fingers slipped out of you, leaving you to whine at the loss. He smiled softly at your pout, lifting his clean hand to smoothen the furrow in your brow.
“I want to be inside you when you cum for the first time,” he explained, and you scrunched your nose up at his choice of words. They were unfamiliar, but not unwelcome, and clearly he found it amusing, judging from the snort that exhaled through his nose. “You tell me if it gets too much. Promise.”
You released a shaky breath, peering up at him from where he hovered over you, his hand tracing the lines on your face.
“I promise.”
That was all he needed to line himself up with you, gently easing the tip of him inside. It was an uncomfortable stretch, one that had you whimpering in disturbance. Simon shushed you, cradling his hand over your cheek and placing a warm kiss on your nose.
“I know, sweetheart. Tell me to stop. I will.”
You shook your head in protest despite the clear fluster of your emotions. He could see the inner workings of your mind driving themselves into exhaustion, so he grabbed one of your hands that were fisting the tufts of your blanket in a death grip, gently guiding it to the span of his bare shoulder.
“Dig your nails in if you have to, pretty girl. I don’t mind, hm?”
He knew when you were stimulated, you needed something to grasp and claim as yours. It was the reason you picked at your fingers the way you did, or gnawed on your lip until it was bloodied and raw. Now, he was encouraging you to release that tension, but at his own expense instead. He wanted you to express yourself comfortably.
You did as he said the more he pressed into you. Your nails created sharp indents into his scarred skin, threatening to break and pierce into him. His face showed no discomfort of his own from the sting, instead focused on your own, eyes gazing into yours the entirety of him sheathing himself fully.
Every time your face twitched, he leaned down to kiss it, showering you with his encouragement and pride for you.
When his hips were flush with yours, he stayed still, giving you all the time you needed to adjust.
Your entire body was more full than ever before, and you began to take in that feeling. It was like the world came to a stop and was waiting for your return, remaining patient and kind while you gave in to the fresh feeling of intimacy to its fullest.
“Still good, sweetheart?” he asked, and his voice brushed all the worries away.
“Mhm.”
“Doin’ amazing, sweet girl. M’gonna move now, okay?”
Another nod and he began to guide his hips back, dragging along the inside of your walls before promptly pressing back forward. It left your mind in a frenzy, and the only thing you could do was blink up at him and gasp every time he pushed and pulled in a game of tug of war.
Simon smothered you in affection while he continued to thrust into you, pressing along the spongy spot in your core that had your mind blanking. The blanket beneath you was soft against your skin, and you squirmed against it cozily whenever his thrusts had your body slightly shifting every time his hips slapped into yours, thankful he knew you well enough that he recognized what you needed to feel content.
Pleasure wracked your body, becoming overwhelming hot under the flesh of your skin. It flushed you a sheen a pink, layering you were evidence of your enjoyment, and he pressed daft kisses against the warmth.
The chord was unraveling, and the more it threatened to snap, the more Simon whispered you praises.
“That’s it, pretty girl. Doin’ so well, it feels good, yeah? You can let go, you can do it.”
With a loud cry, you did, the thin chord breaking in half and snapping, leaving you to burn with unfamiliar euphoria that took over every part of your bloodstream. It warmed you from the inside and out, and when you came down from it, Simon had pulled out, finishing himself off into his hand. When you gave him a confused and rather ruffled look, he smiled.
“Don’t think you’ll like the feelin', sweetheart,” he noted.
You laid there with an overwhelming flood of satisfaction when he went to clean himself up. When he returned, he had a warm washcloth that he used to carefully clean you up as well, knowing that if the wet, sticky feeling lingered, you’d grow agitated and uncomfortable.
Simon wrapped you up in his arms when all was said and done, making sure to brush away the stray hairs that tickled your forehead and instead tucking them behind your ears. Your mind was on mute, the consistent buzz that always lingered settling into nothingness. Simon tucked you into him, swaddling you with the fuzzy blanket and tugging it up over your ears just the way you liked, before pressing a chaste kiss on your forehead and softly playing with your hair until you were consumed by your own sleepiness.
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jinxthequeergirl · 13 days
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what would have happened if instead of stanley bill had gotten into reader's head? and in the end it was reader who got their memory erased. i just want to see stan's reaction, cuz reader is his partner. how he will try to do something or on the contrary, resign himself?
writing by translation sorry for mistakes
I See you In the Back of my mind
Stanley pines x fiance! reader
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Thank you anon I love you 🙏😚
Warning:
~~~~~~~~~~☆~~~~~~~~~~
You knew what he was doing. You knew right away what was happening when Bill brought you and the twins back to the Pines brothers still locked in their cage. You'd spent half your life with Stanley to recognize him even in his twins' clothes.
You locked eyes with them shaking your head, warning him not to do what you thought he was about to do, begging him with your look.
"Alright,times up! I've got the kids and your little wife to be! y/n! I think I'm gonna kill one of them!" You struggled in Bills grip watching the kids hopelessly in his other hand. "Enie meni...minie...YOU!-"
"Wait!"
Everything froze for a moment.
"I surrender!" You shook your head before Bill dropped you.
"Good choice!" The air was knocked out of you on impact with the floor. "Don't do it!" You yelled. Bill snapped his fingers, and a zipper replaced your mouth.
"I accept under one condition, you let my brother y/n and the kids go."
"It's a Deal.
Bill stuck out his hand, a bright blue flame engulfing it. Stanley stared at it, glancing back at his family behind him.
"Grunkle Ford, don't trust him!" Dipper yelled.
You stood to your feet, fighting the zipper on your mouth, finally freeing it.
"Stop! Take me instead of st-Ford!" You said running up to stans side.
"What are you doing?" You ignored him. "I know everything he does, I studied thought journals to reopen the portal, I might even know MORE than him, plus.. you can keep my body as a physical form. it's younger than Fords!." He snapped again, the zipper disappearing from your mouth.
"Y/n! Are you crazy!?"
"Y/n no, you can't do this!" Both brothers were yelling at you now. Stan held your hand tightly, giving you the same look you gave him only moments before. You could hear Bill hum while he thought.
"Alright y/n! You make a good point it's a deal then!"
"Same rules apply the Pines family leaves here untouched!" You added.
Bill rolled his eyes.
"Sure, sure."
You turned quickly and hugged stan,slipping something in his pocket. "Do what you have too, take care of the kids. I love you!" Stan stared at you in shock, unable to speak before you turned away and locked hands with Bill.
The Pines watched you fall into a deep sleep in front of them. "She looks peacful." Mable commented. Voicing exactly what stan was thinking in that moment. He felt in his pocket for what you had slipped inside pulling out your engagement ring.
Ford sighed, deeply pulling out the memory gun.
"Wait, we can't...." stan Said stepping in front of you, blocking for your ring firmly in his grasp.
"Stanley, we don't have any other choice...:
"It should have been me... cant...I can't lose her! Before the kids, she was the only family I had I...Shes everything to me." He said, falling to his knees in front of you helplessly hanging his head.
"Stanley...step aside."
You would have tidied the place up if you knew you were having guests. The only thing on your mind when Bill entered was memories of Stan and the kids.
"What do you see in that guy?" Bill asked, finding you watching your last date with stan. You wondered if that really was the last ever time you'd be with him.
"He makes me laugh." You chuckled, you got up wiping the memory completely from your mind, now only standing in complete nothingness. You thought it would have happened right away, but you figured Stanley was putting up a fight about it.
That was another reason you liked him.
Then you felt it.
"I'm really sorry to do this to you cipher, but you messed with the people I love."
Blue flames engulfed your mind before the blink of an eye.
"You tricked me!" He made a move like he was trying to leave. Instead, you created a cage around him. "Your in MY head I still have some control of you right now." You said as he pulled at the bars.
"Is all of this worth it! All for the Pines family? For STANLEY? "
"If not them, who?"
You sat down in front of his cage and watched the flames get higher. "I can offer you anything! Let me out, fame, money riches! I'll let you and stanley live out the happily married life you've always wanted!Anything, please!"
"You're begging for your life!?" You laughed at him.
That was really the last thing you remembered laughing in Bill's face before it all went away.
It all ended so suddenly. In a massive wave, it was over. Stanley wasn't really sure what else he was expecting to happen when it ended. But he didn't really have time to think about that now.
"She did it." Ford said somewhere from behind him as he made his way to you. "Y/n!" You blinked at him in confusion before he scooped you up in the tightest hug he could muster lifting you from the ground.
"Oh! Ah ow!"
"You did it! You saved us!" He said, placing you down and cupping your cheeks. He was so caught up in the moment that he forgot what you just sacrificed.
You stared at him in confusion. "Uh, sorry, Mr." You said shaking him off. "I'm not really sure who you are or what you are talking about..."
"No...y/n c'mon, it's me! It's stan.."
"Stanley... she can't remember..." Ford said, placing a hand on his shoulder. They watched as the kids tried to talk to you, sharing their own memories with you, trying to get you to remember them.
Everyone decided to go back home and rest a moment before trying any further. Maybe the shack would help. You let stan hold your hand mainly to help guide you through the woods.
"You all live like this?" You asked partly, joking as he helped you step over the ruble and debris of the shack. "You live like this too." Stan corrected in a similar joking manner.
"Huh." Stan guided you to what you assumed to be the family room at one point and let you flop into a big yellow seat.
"This feels nice." You sighed, shutting your eyes. You weren't sure why, but your body ached, your head throbbed, and it felt like the first time you'd gotten off your feet in days.
The room fell silent. You opened one eye to see everyone staring at you and each other silently debating on what to do.
"I know!" Mable shouted, running through the house before returning with a book in hand. "My scrapbook! This has to help her remember!" Mable jumped up onto the seat, squishing herself between you and the arm rest. "Look! This is the first time we met! The day we came to gravity falls!"
"What about that romantic yet almost dangerous date we planned for you and stan?" Dipper asked, flipping through the pages.
You stared at the pages, photos with you in them, stories to go with it. But none of it was clicking.
"LOOK! the wedding invites you, let me decorate!" Mable said, shoving one very glittery piece of pink paper into your hand.
"Wedding?" The paper read both yours and stans name the line where a date should have been remained empty.
"If only your grunkle could commit to a date, these would be beautiful mable." You joked, rolling your eyes.
Everyone shared a look. "And where is my ring!?"
"She's staring to remember!" Stan jumped to find the ring once again, digging it out from his pocket and slipping it into place on your finger. You felt something light up inside you when he did. You placed a hand on his cheek and smiled before planting a reasuring kiss on the top of his head, followed by you squishing his fez down on him with a laugh.
It took the rest of the night, and even a couple of days, but eventually you everything fell back into place. And eventually you and stan where passing out wedding invites together to the towns folk of gravity falls during the twins birthday party.
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