#and it's not your place to decide they fuck with your blog's aesthetics or some shit oh my god

[genshinimpactlife]

Psssst psssst could I request nsfw headcannons for c0ckwarming alhaitham and dottore? Have a wonderful day/night 😚

Cockwarming Headcanons

Alhaitham is a lazy man, so he would adore cockwarming.

Early morning hard-on? He will happily pull his pajama pants down just enough to let his cock out, slipping it inside you before falling asleep again.

He loves the feeling of being inside you. He would happily lay there for hours with you keeping his cock warm.

He likes to lazily grind against you but never fully thrust his hips into you.

When you're being a brat, he will have you sit on his cock, not letting you move until you're begging him to let you ride him.

"Can my Pet not keep still? That's another five minutes of having to sit here and look pretty."

After you have sex, he doesn't like to pull out. Instead, he lets his soft cock stay inside you as the two of you cuddle.

When you're connected like this, he can't keep his hands off you, always running them along your body, leaving behind goosebumps in their wake.

He will do just about anything to keep you on his cock, keeping you distracted with sweet kisses and mumbling about "five more minutes."

Working in the lab? Of course he expects his pretty assistant to keep his cock warm.

He always has you sitting in his lap while you work, chest to chest.

You are not allowed to talk or wiggle while he's working. You just have to be a good warm hole for him to use.

If you move too much or make a sound, he won't hesitate to slap your bare ass, leaving a bright red mark before returning to his work.

But of course, he always rewards you when you do a good job. He will even let you decide how he fucks you if you were perfect for him.

Most of the time cockwarming is a punishment for you, to make you squirm, or simply for his own pleasure.

But some nights after you have sex, he can't help but keep his cock buried inside you.

If you try to move away to clean up or roll over, his arm will wrap around you, pulling you right back into place.

The two of you will fall asleep like this, connected for the entire night.

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[ethereal-night-fairy]

Forgotten sorrows

Chapter 1

A Fae!AU story including COD characters

Fae!Soap X Female Reader

Your sister meets a mysterious man with an odd name and things just spiral downhill from there.

Warnings: MDNI, suggestive language, one use of the word fuck, dark themes , minor character death, attempted SA (not by soap),

This story was completely inspired by @ghouljams Fae!Au of COD MW. This won't make much sense if you don't read their blog. But I promise you won't be disappointed their an amazing writing so you should definitely check out their jaw dropping work. I hope I could do this au some justice. It's been a really long time since I've written a story. Sorry for any spelling mistakes in advance I did proof read when I was editing this chapter but I could've missed something. I'm halfway through the second chapter which will be extra angsty and hopefully in the third you'll enjoy Soap's Pov. Other COD characters will make appearances later on if I decide I want to continue writing.

Forgotten Sorrows Masterlist

Masterlist

Words: 7k

The Renaissance festival was beginning to take life, like a dragon awakening from its long slumber. Majority of stalls were set up with a numerous array of artwork, jewellery and knick knacks on display, while the main stage for theatrical performances was receiving its final touch ups. Food stalls were made to look like tavern bars and the arena for jousting was getting rowdy with fans cheering for their favourite 'knights'.

Groups of people were beginning to pile in dressed in their finest mythical attire, their excitement creating a buzz and ripple through the air, it was almost electrifying. Some costumes were eerily realistic causing you some discomfort if you stared too long. Your own excitement was settling in as you finished setting up your stall with your work. You liked dabbling in a number of different creative hobbies hence why your stall looked like the inside of a pawn shop but at least your products all matched an aesthetic making it look somewhat cohesive.

The place was getting increasingly crowded as the festival went into full swing. People had bumped past your stall in a hurry causing things to tumble to the ground. You rush to pick them up as people brush past you. Looking up you catch the eye of a strange man who just stares at you while you tidy things away. You try to ignore him as his eyes roam your body but you can practically feel his eyes on you. Suddenly a hand settles on your shoulder as you finish fixing your display causing you to jump.

Turning around you see your younger sister, smiling ear to ear. You sigh with relief as you looked around to find that the odd man had disappeared. She had just come from the stage with her binder in hand, obviously excited to tell me something with the way she was bouncing. She was dressed as a pink fairy-like creature more on the costume side rather than aiming for accuracy, but she looked beautiful nonetheless.

"Well? Go on, tell me what's gotten you so jittery", You smirk holding her shoulders swaying her back and forth jokingly.

She smiles and begins her monologue as if she's talking to an audience. She goes on and on about a guy she had just met, how kind and sweet he was, how he really liked the short play she had written. How he couldn't stop complimenting her writing. How he was exited to watch her play later on today. You had already watched it multiple times at your local theater. You always went to support her, this would be no different. At this point you had zoned out from her monologue since all she was doing was fawning over said dude. You still caught small details here and there as she talked while you worked and dealt with customers. Boyish charm, rugged ensemble, electrifying green eyes, strong biceps was what you had learned about this oh so charming man. She was a writer through and through you laughed silently at her antics.

"Oh and you wouldn't believe what he did next", she screeches

"Let me guess he grabbed your hand, kissed it like a knight devoting himself to you, while confessing his undying love!", You joked

She gasped with theatrics "How did you know!?" "He did actually kiss my hand though, there will be plenty of time for him to confess his undying love later" she laughed. "I'm so full of inspiration I feel like I could write for days, who knew a compliment could get me so worked up", she giggled.

"Oh! Before I forget I wanted to show you a job offer I received to write another play, this could be my big break!! My plays could reach Broadway!", She explained excitedly.

You look at her skeptically considering her history with scams. But took a look at the contract anyway. While you read the contract you don't initially find anything suspicious until you get to ownership clause, and lo and behold in the terms and conditions in very fine print you find out once someone publishes their work the company claims to own that intellectual property as the writer has 'voluntarily' given over their rights to their own work by agreeing to work for them. And thereby are entitled to sell or distribute their work accordingly without consulting or needing to pay additional compensation towards the writers. You feel yourself seething from the audacity of this company.

You look at your sister with tired eyes "Please tell me you haven't signed anything yet", I plead

"Oh no I wouldn't have, especially since the last incident that happened", she looks down sheepishly.

"Oh thank god... this company just wants to steal your work, they don't actually want to help you so don't accept the offer", You let out a long breath while showing her the terms and conditions of the contract and telling her to read them next time. You look at her with pity, for someone so talented she was extremely naive when it came to things that required common sense, probably because she was always in her head but it was hard to stay upset with for the same reasons. You smile at her and let her know she did a good job telling you before deciding to do anything. Your sister smiles proudly at your compliment. You give her some advice about stalls that sell cheap manufactured products to pass them off as homemade. And to be careful talking to strangers before she goes around the festival while you continue working telling her you'll see her later on in the day.

You were hoping to enjoy the festival once you finish up with your stall but for the time being you happily engaging with customers and other artists that came for a chat. One of the products you offered was small paintings on thick ornate card roughly the size of a palm. They resembled the aesthetic of renaissance paintings. They were selling pretty well, by late afternoon you had sold majority of your products. Things weren't as busy around the stalls anymore since the theater performances had begun. You met some odd customers here and there and tried your best not to stare at their life like costumes. They were almost ethereal in the way they held themselves but you put on your best smile and treated them like anyone else. Their appearances often inspired you to paint more. But you didn't want to be rude and do it without their consent.

Time went on and things began to quieten. The jousting seemed to be going well, with the cheering as any indicator. You hoped to finish up soon. You wanted to explore a bit before the plays started. As your waiting around for customer you suddenly feel a dark pressure on your chest as if someone had placed a rock on your heart while you were tidying your display. You look up at your new customer and feel a shiver run down your spine. There was a dark looming presence about this.…this man? He wore a mask with a skull on it, which you supposed wasn't too uncommon especially with the way everyone was dressed here, but what you found odd was that you could feel fear seeping into your bones by just his appearance, you could almost see smoke or some sort of shadow emanating from him. You didn't even notice his partner until she spoke to you breaking the weird hold you had just felt. You grazed your woven rowan bark choker unconsciously, it had a small shield knot pendant on it. It brought you some peace as you subconsciously thank your best friend for gifting it to you years ago.

You put on your best smile while greeting them, you were back into your professional mode hoping not to offend them for staring. His girlfriend or wife was super kind and sweet, a really big contrast to the hulking figure behind her. She asked about the portrait paintings, you told her the price and rough time it would take to complete. The man didn't want to be in the painting so his partner who he affectionately called 'Love' was the one you painted. You were compelled to put extra effort to make it even better than your previous paintings for some reason, maybe out of guilt for judging them. You finish the painting, signing it on the back with your nickname and spray the sealant on it so it would last.

'Love' was overjoyed how it had turned out and eagerly handed it to their boyfriend, who stared at it for a while before turning and looking at another odd couple standing off to the side, he specifically stared at the very tall man with a full head and face covering which funnily enough looked like a t-shirt with eyeholes. You didn't quite understand what he meant to be, maybe an executioner? He had a menacing aura about him as well, something you definitely didn't want to deal with. Once he had caught his eye he proudly showed off the painting before sliding it into his chest pocket with a smirk you think with the way his mask moved upward slightly. You show your appreciation to them as they leave still terrified trying to control your trembling. They walk around while the other couple approached your stand. You really were low on your luck today. It seemed like the girlfriend wasn't all that interested in a self portrait but took her time browsing some of the jewellery pieces you had made. While her very large and very intimidating boyfriend whimpers at them so he could get a painting too, "But that beast got one Liebling, why can't I" "Don't you love me anymore?" He sulked. After a while she sighs and finally relents not wanting to deal with his whining for the rest of the festival.

You get to work immediately not wanting to stay in this awkward and nerve wracking situation. You put the same amount of effort into their painting as you had done to the previous one through a very compelling feeling. You chalk it up to guilt again for judging them. As you finish, you sign and seal the painting before handing it to them. This giant of a man is overjoyed when he receives the painting and you see him hold his darling close while staring at the painting. You watch them leave after paying, confused as to what you had just witnessed. But you decide to ignore it and continue working for another hour or so, before closing and packing up your stand with the little products you had left.

You look everywhere for sister but can't seem to find her even after numerous calls and text messages. An odd feeling of dread settles into your stomach. It almost felt as if you were being watched which put you on edge. You look around one last time hoping to catch a glimpse of her somewhere. Then suddenly you see her pink fairy hair at the edge of the crowd going towards the outdoor theater. You hurriedly make your way towards her incase she disappears again. Finally catching up you see a man clearly flirting with her. You roll your eyes thinking this is the likely reason why she hasn't checked her phone. You wave to get her attention and she looks and smiles at you while you make your way towards them not knowing what to expect from this guy.

"I've been trying to get a hold of you for so long" you pant slightly from your jog. "Where have you been?"

"Oh Soap here has been keeping me quite busy", she laughs playfully introducing him

The first thing you notice is his eyes… his overwhelming green/blue eyes, you felt like you'd drown in them if you didn't look away. Next came his perfect white smile, a little too perfect. With his boyish smirk to follow, you stare for a second too long earning you a toothy grin. Making you look away in embarrassment. You find yourself drawn to him in a weird inhumane way which unnerved you since you usually had great control over your emotions. You felt almost tied to him in a sense, like he was reeling in a fish with bait. But right now all you could think about was his lips devouring yours, stealing your breath away, then breathing life back into you when you'd clutched onto him desperately. His hands around your waist, holding you against a wall, his fingers touching…..You snap out of it quickly while holding the pendant on your choker. You feel guilt and shame enclosing around your heart making it hard to breathe but managed to calm down. While your sister continued her conversation, oblivious to your reaction to him. Your never had such a physical reaction to anyone before, paired with the feeling of being watched you were at your wits end today.

You introduce yourself as "Faoi Rún" or just "Rún" (pronounced as fae ruin or just ruin), before your sister can give him your government name when trying to introduce you. Knowing she has a tendency to forget you don't like your name given out.

"Oh? rún eh? That yer real name?" He asks intrigued

"Wouldn't you like to know" you say laughing tensely trying to avoid his beautiful eyes almost afraid he'll look too deep into your psyche. Afraid he'll figure out what was going on in your dirty mind.

"She's particular on strangers knowing her name, sorry, she might tell you if you get to know her better", she laughs playfully lightening the mood.

"Ye two don't look like sisters" he says "Did one o' ye get switched at the hospital by mistake? he joked

"We grew up in the same orphanage, we're sisters by choice not by blood", you state plainly indicating you didn't want to delve deeper into this topic.

"Come, both of you my play is about to start, I want you both there with me", your sister says trying to lighten the mood. In the short amount of time she knew him you couldn't understand how they had gotten so buddy buddy so quickly. This was extremely concerning for many reasons.

You weren't one to believe in the supernatural or faeries per say. But growing up with your witch best friend who lived near the orphanage you had certain habits instilled in you. With how often she'd visit you those habits just became second nature at some point. You were thankful for the knowledge you received on the unseen, though not always believing it.

People were tricky. You'd meet odd people here and there but you'd never think they weren't human per say though you were told otherwise. Maybe they were just odd or maybe you were desperate to deny their existence for your own sanity. Not wanting to complicate your life. Deciding to live in ignorant bliss. But the current situation had it becoming near impossible. Things you wanted to suppress were starting to bubble up. Especially since your encounter with this strangely charming but terrifying man.

Your sister had many friends in the orphanage when she first arrived. Who were closer to her age to play with so she didn't see the need to tag along when you went to see your best friend. Who lived nearby and had her grandmother's house just down the road to the orphanage.

You were often left to your own devices being among some of the older kids that weren't adopted. Even though you were only one or two years older, what made playing awkward with Daisy was how much you matured at a young age due to unreliable guardians. Where the orphanage caretakers lacked you would pick up the slack and care for the younger children especially your sister who relied on you more as her friends slowly started leaving. She felt hurt and alone thinking something was wrong with her for not being adopted like her friends. You often had to remind her she had you and you weren't planning on leaving her. Among the other unadopted children you two stuck together and took care of one another even after leaving and becoming adults. While the rest moved on and started new lives trying to forget their time in that orphanage.

You're snapped out of your thoughts as you arrive at a decent stop to sit on the grass as the performance begins playing. The whole time through the play you watched your sister swoon over this ethereal man in an extremely concerning manner even for her. She didn't really acknowledge you much, too busy hanging on to every sweet word this man had to say. There was something off about him you just couldn't place your finger on it. Every fiber in your being was telling you to grab your sister and run far far away. You didn't know what to do but you tried desperately to keep your composure, deciding to have a talk with her once he left. He caught you staring while you were deep in thought thinking about how you could warn her. He smirks almost knowingly as if he could read your mind and gives you a wink as he continues to flatter your sister who was weak to compliments.

The play ends and you stand up to applaud with everyone else then you ask to go grab something to eat with her alone but she quickly states that Soap wanted to treat her to dinner. You glare inwardly at his boldness. While he returns a smirk. You think about his odd name that you brushed past the first time you heard it, why did you ignore it the first time? You were usually very attentive to details and information.

You sigh knowing full well that you won't be able to dissuade her now he has his claws in her. So you relent for now thinking of an action plan to get rid of this leach even though you knew very little about him. He just gave you bad vibes and didn't quite understand it. Still trying to convince yourself he was just an odd human, someone you definitely didn't like. Someone who you should never get involved with. But you had to protect your sister. You just had too, something sinister was brewing. You could feel it and you needed help.

-

One month had passed since the incident, your sister had left with…with, what was his name again?.... Whatever it doesn't matter she had left with him to go to dinner while you tried enjoying the rest of the festival. But you couldn't calm your nerves for some reason and ended up leaving soon after. Just to make sure she was ok you sent her a text asking if she had gotten home safe later that evening. You were relieved when she responded by telling you all about the date they went on afterwards. Although you were happy for her there was a boulder in the pit of your stomach telling you to keep this man away from your dangerously naive sister. She's been a bit slow to respond since then for some reason causing you some anxiety, but try to rationalise and chalk it up to her being busy at work. Even though you would usually meet a couple times each month. She hasn't said anything else about that man….why can't you remember his name?....His features are difficult to recall now too…. You usually pride yourself about your retention of details. But it feels like a fog enters your brain when you try to think about him, how odd… But the one thing that hasn't left is your desire to protect your sister. Something isn't right with this situation. But considering she hasn't texted you fawning over him you might be paranoid for no reason. She probably decided she didn't like him all that much after all.

You put down your painting brush even before your alarm went off signaling you to take a break. It's been something you've been working on after your hospital incident. You weren't planning on working yourself into the ground. There needed to be a balance. Growing up an orphan you didn't have many people to care for you apart from your sister, your best friend and her grandmother that you visited often. So you would overwork yourself in academics and in your career to gain some sense of worth. Years of neglect had taken its toll on you, ending you up in the hospital in the intensive care unit for months. Only then did you realise the people you worked so hard for didn't give a flying fuck about you, you were so easily replaceable to them that they gave your projects to someone else who took credit for all your hard work. Not once did they come to see you, the only thing you received on your return was an office full of paperwork and a deadline to complete them by. You quit there and then only keeping in contact with the people who genuinely cared to visit you on your near death bed. Which were few and far between. From there after getting encouragement from your best friend and sister you decided to pursue your painting career again. And a bunch of others craft related hobbies.

It wasn't too hard considering you had a art college degree as well as having a couple years of work experience as a gallery curator. You had connections in the industry which you definitely used to further your career. Painting was your main focus from then on but you dabbled in other crafts including metalwork and pottery.

You found joy in the variety of work you could produce. This path in life felt more fulfilling and worthwhile in the long run. You enjoyed the spontaneity of your daily inspiration spikes. It kept things new and fresh to keep you engaged for longer periods of time without burning out or getting bored. You never forced yourself to work on something you didn't enjoy doing even if that meant stopping halfway because you know once you were up for it again the piece would be completed. So you had many unfinished projects just waiting patiently for you to come back to them, and eventually you will but you were never in a rush.

You stand up from your craft desk putting away your brushes and paints after cleaning them, glancing one last time at the large paintings you were commissioned to paint by the community council for the local library. Your back was stiff due to the prolonged sitting position you were in. You stretch on your way to the kitchen about to make yourself some herbal tea. You browse through your phone deciding to send your sister a text saying you'll be coming over to check in on her with dinner. She had a tendency to neglect herself when engrossed in work which you could relate to. You go to grab the jar with the tea only to realize it's empty. You let out a groan, jotting down on a piece of paper to visit your best friend with baked goods to buy more tea from her, not that she ever really lets you pay in cash so have to get creative. You stick it to the fridge while you go about preparing dinner and some snacks to bring her.

Everything was cooked and packed tightly you placed the food in your tote bag as you grabbed your phone, wallet and keys. Glancing one last time to see if you received a text back from your sister, which you hadn't. But that wasn't too unusual either. You had made her favourite dishes, hoping she would like them. You lock up as you leave, adjusting your Rowan tree branch hanging from the door of your condo.

Once you get to your sister's apartment you get buzzed in by the front desk since you visit so often. You knew the security guard and receptionists by name. They were very kind and sweet, just a bit odd at times but harmless.

"Evening Aodhán", you smile handing him a two wrapped homemade cookie,

"For your trouble, for looking out for my sister", you laugh jokingly "Ones for Ilayda"

Aodhán: "It's not raining Ilayda won't be working today", he says greeting you back

"Oh? I hadn't realised she only works on rainy days", you say confused

"Is Migina here? You can give it to her"

Aodhán: "Oh yeah she'll be here soon I'll let her know you left something nice to eat"

You say your farewells as you make your way up the stairs finding her apartment on the first floor. You knock and wait. Nothing happens, there's no noise from inside the apartment. You knock again harder this time checking your phone hoping you didn't just arrive when she wasn't home. You could always leave the food with Aobhán to give to your sister but that wasn't the problem, you had a nagging feeling you needed to get into her apartment right away. So you ring her number as you knock much harder this time probably disturbing her neighbors as you call out her name, not her real name of course. You use her childhood nickname 'Daisy'. Because she loved asking you for daisy crowns in summer.

Finally the door creaks but you aren't greeted by your sister, something with captivating ocean eyes has taken residence in her home. You look at him with your mouth agape confused as to why he's here.

"You!? Why are you here? Where is she!! What have you done to her!", panic sets in, your mind is racing with the worst possible scenarios. You push past him into the apartment frantically looking for her. Your arm is grabbed preventing you from going further in.

"Calm yer horses, ah haven't done anythin tae her lass", he says with an eerie calmness. "She's sleeping in her bed after writing all day. Ye should calm down, she needs her rest" he says in such a gentle voice it almost had you convinced he cared…. almost but you caught an insidious glint in his eyes for a quarter of second which sent your mind reeling.

You yank back your arms wondering what he's thinking. You don't bother responding to him as you eye him with skepticism. One glance around the place you can see she hasn't been taking care of herself. The apartment is messy, the dishes have piled up and papers are thrown everywhere. You go to look into the fridge and find it empty. You level this infuriating man with your worst glare. You place down your bag on the counter.

"Why are you here?" You say seething at him

"What dae ye mean? cannae ah come see mah lassie?", He says matter of factly. "Ah dinnae appreciate ye hissing at me. Ah haven't done anythin' tae ye…", It felt like he was about to say 'yet' but stopped himself. He looked at me like a fly who had come in to ruin his day by buzzing around his head.

"Since when? When did you two become so close? She hasn't said a word about you since the festival", You say trying to keep your voice calm and level not wanting to wake her up. Looking at him like he's some parasite, as you begin to tidy up the kitchen quietly.

"She's a grown lassie she doesn't need tae consult ye tae see someone, ye seem awfully nosy if ye ask me" he says losing his gentle voice completely to adopt a more rugged sound. Something that sits deep in his chest, causing your insides to churn for odd reasons. Your eyes meet his and for a second as you look back, you're very much frozen while the soapy dishes sit in your hands. You feel your blood run cold as his eyes flicker downwards towards your body. What was this man thinking!?

"Good thing I wasn't asking you then", you clap back trying to snap him out of whatever hedonistic thoughts he was having, praying you yourself wouldn't fall down that rabbit hole with how easily he could charm someone. But then again your sister was a bad example considering how gullible she could be. You continue to tidy up while deciding not to engage in a conversation with him anymore than necessary.

"How long has she been sleeping for?", you ask as you pick up her pages while setting them aside.

"Couldn't say, a while?" he shrugs nonchalantly leaning against the wall while watching you, no devouring your figure as it moves around cleaning.

You fix him to a glare not understanding why he was here, what purpose could he possibly serve doing nothing in your sister's apartment while it's in this sorry state, he didn't even offer to help you seethe.

You were more upset she kept it a secret that she was seeing him. Because if she had told you, you would have come over the same day to explain why that would be a very very bad idea. You just decide to ignore him for the rest of the cleaning which takes an hour before you decide to wake your sister up to get refreshed as you heat the food up for everyone.

Knocking on her bedroom door you enter to find her flopped onto her bed , sheets thrown around. You approach her gently as you call out her nickname to wake her up. Her face had dark circles and she looked exhausted, you've never seen her look so exhausted and overworked. After many attempts she finally wakes up groaning.

"Sis? What are you doing here?", she says rubbing her eyes

"I came to check in on you, you haven't been replying back to me properly I got worried and came here to drop off some food" you say kindly as she just nods saying she had gotten caught up in a new project and forgot to do much else apart from writing.

"Freshen up I'll get the food ready for us" ,you say before leaving the room to do just that. Not realising Soap was listening the whole time.

You set the table for three as Soap watches from the wall looking like a statue not saying anything too busy in his own thoughts, probably plotting something you think.

You reheat the food and refill the water jug, placing it on the table as your sister enters. Soaps demeanor changes drastically as she approaches. He goes towards her to show his concern for her wellbeing as she reassures him that she's okay, that she's just tired from overworking and that she's sorry she fell asleep while he was here to spend time with her. Where was this concern when the house needed cleaning? or when her fridge was empty? or when she hadn't probably eaten in days? You looked at him with venom which my sister noticed as she sat down beside me while soap stood by her side.

"It's not what it looks like", she whispers to you. "He was just here to help with my writing, I'll explain later". You just nod as you pour food for her and go to do the same for soap but he stops you.

"Oh ah wouldn't wantae intrude, ye twa enjoy yer meal", he says with sad voice kinda implying you had said something to upset him or make him feel unwelcome. Your sister looks at you for answers. While you just shake your head ignoring her look.

"It's not intruding at all, you've been such a great help to me for this past month, I couldn't even thank you enough even if I tried. Please sit down and have a meal with us. My sister is a wonderful cook. I'm sure she doesn't mind you joining, she even set you a place on the table" she says in her sweetest tone.

"Are ye sure, a'm feelin like I might owe ye later," he says sitting down beside her

"You don't owe me anything, this meal is given freely without strings attached", you say plainly trying to keep your hate at bay.

"Consider it a repayment for helping my sister for the past month", you quip while smiling innocently while you pour him the food. Your sister was too busy inhaling her meal to notice your comment. Which concerned you further, she looked starved.

You make small talk asking about what your sister has been doing that caused her apartment to be in the state you found it in. You reprimand her lightly telling her she needs to take care of herself better. Which she agreed to but said it was extremely difficult when she was in her 'writing zone' but promised to do better.

You tell her you'll go grocery shopping with her tomorrow since it was sunday and her kitchen was barren and she agreed. She complimented 'Soap' who's name you kept forgetting for some reason but tried desperately to remember it this time. She said he was a huge help since he worked as theater stage director at a point in his life and knew what looked good on stage and what didn't. He often came over to help her adjust her scenes or to just hang out which was why he was here today not for any other nefarious reasons she insisted. You simply nod along not saying much.

"My sister is just a little overprotective", she says smiling at him. "But she has my best intentions at heart" you smile slightly at her words while continuing to eat, not happy at this new friendship that was blooming between the two when you were certain he had ulterior motives.

"Hmm I can see that", he laughs while eating his food. He looked up at you as looked at him wondering if he was enjoying the food. You feel a blush creep up your neck as you look away quickly, your heart hammering as he chuckles at your odd bashfulness. You didn't understand why you were so drawn to him but you hated the fact you couldn't control your thoughts. Why did you care so much if he was enjoying your food or not!? You weren't usually like this…

"Ye weren't kidding when ye said she could cook", he complimented. "Ah haven't had such a crakin' meal in a while" he winks at you smiling which you ignore and say you appreciate it.

You tried many times to get to know Soap throughout the dinner but he gave vague answers that angered you further but you kept it within. He seemed to be enjoying your frustration. It almost seemed like he was trying to get a reaction out of you that wasn't complete hatred and mistrust. Your sister was oblivious to his antics which concerned you further. It seemed like she was in a daze and not her usual daydreaming daze. This felt different. But you couldn't explain how. You cleaned up the dishes after everyone was finished while thinking of a way to talk to your sister today or tomorrow about cutting off her new friendship. You had to do it in a way that wouldn't upset her since you knew she had trauma relating to losing friends. The last thing you wanted to do was upset her. You laid out the snacks for later if she wanted them and decided to put the rest of the food in the fridge. You start getting ready to leave since It was getting late and you'd be back tomorrow anyway to help with her groceries, you look at Soap to see if he was leaving too.

Maybe he felt your stare and decided to call it a day not wanting to face your wrath. He said his goodbyes and left before you did saying he greatly enjoyed the meal you provided. Your sister thanked him for all his help recently and apologized for falling asleep while talking to him. You tell your sister to take care of herself and to rest up and try to be more careful who she lets into her home so easily after Soap had left. She says she'll be more careful before giving you a tight hug as you make your way out of the apartment. You put a reminder on your phone to go grocery shopping tomorrow with your sister and to bake some desserts to bring to your best friend later that day. You write down a quick list of things you'll need as you walk down the stairs.

You say your farewells to Aobhán and Migina as you make your way out of the building towards your car in the moonlight parking lot. The air was chilly and there was an odd mist in the air. Wanting to get home as soon as possible you hasten your pace feeling the heat of your breath on your face. As you get to your car a cold ice hand grips you from behind pushing you against the car door. You feel a large body behind you as you begin to struggle but it wasn't producing any heat which was odd. But that was the least of your worries, you were pressed harder into the door until your movements stopped and you began to shout only for your mouth to be covered by a rugged hand. You felt disgusted by the man grinding his body on yours

You continue to put 110% of your energy into fighting off this attacker while trying to stay calm and collected. You put your keys between your knuckles and try to stab them backwards hoping to hit something which you do. He lets out a grunt beside your ear as he steps back slightly to gain his ground again. In that little time to turn around with your keys ready to attack again, your heart hammering thinking you might die here. The attacker grips his side where you had hurt him still growling as he knocks the keys out of your hands as he pins himself against you again. You finally get a glimpse at his moon lit face.

It was no one you recognised, his face was hard to describe as it seemed like it didn't have a consistent state. Every time you look away briefly while fighting him off if face slightly changed or maybe your mind was playing tricks on you in the dark. The face started contorting into a vile form the longer you stared, resembling a beast more than a man. It had large bulging eyes, thin hair balding on its head and warts forming on its face. You managed to throw him to the ground in blind rage as he tried to grab you more intimately. It almost felt you were drawing strength from somewhere other than yourself. You felt utterly disgusted, you kicked him hard in the groin for good measure. While backing up to call the police with your taser out now. But before you could do anything else, another figure stepped from the shadows and stepped on the man's neck as he struggled on the ground to breathe.

You look up to see smoke coming out of Soap's mouth as he flicks his cigarette at the man on the ground without saying anything. You were too shocked to move or do anything as you saw the pure unfiltered rage emanating from his body. His eyes once a beautiful ocean blue were almost black in comparison now. You see him step harder on the man's neck while saying something in a language you didn't understand, it sounded ancient. Like a forgotten battle song sung by your ancestors in times of turmoil. You watched in horror as you heard a snap and pop as the man's body goes limp on the ground before disintegrating before your very eyes. Everything you tried suppressing about the unseen, everything you tried so desperately to deny was crumbling.

You watch Soap approach you and your mind tells you to run, to get away. You might me next! But you couldn't move your legs, all you could do was clutch your heart for dear life. You close your eyes and wait…. The first thing you feel is his breath on your face, warm and bitter due to the tobacco. Next his rough hand on your chin tilting your head back gently.

"Look at me lass", he growls. You whimper and shake your head afraid of what you'll see.

"Come now, ah just wantae make sure yer alright", he changes tactics acting sweet but you could still feel his anger radiating off him.

You open your eyes slowly not wanting him to direct his rage toward you. His blue ones meet your teary ones and you see him smile.

"Ah there she is", he massages the side of your neck trying to comfort you, while you tremble under his touch.

"He didnae hurt ye noo did he? ", You shake your head at his question still afraid of what he was about to do.

"Good…good, ah wasn't expecting someone tae get tae ye first", his words cause your blood to run cold.

"Althoogh all ah was thinking about doin' was havin a word with ye", he smirked at your discomfort

"Ye see ah dinnae appreciate ye interfering with me prey especially one that was sae easy tae catch. Usually isolating thaim is fairly simple bit fur some reason ah cannae git ye tae comply. Ah might fin' ye a wee bit interesting but that doesn't mean ah will let ye ruin mah hard wirk"

You look at him shocked. You didn't expect him to just come out right and say he was planning to do something horrible to your sister. Suddenly all your fear dissipated and anger takes its place. You push him away roughly, while looking at him venomously before you speak.

"You stay away from my sister, or else" you hiss

"Or else what?", he laughs "What can a wee lassie like ye dae?"

"You don't want to see what lengths I would go to, to protect my family. I'll make you regret ever coming into my sister's life", you say with conviction.

"Let's see about that. Ah wonder if ye'll be able tae dae much when ye cannae remember anythin' ", before you could react you felt a tap to your forehead as everything faded into black.

Copyright © by ethereal-night-fairy. 2023. All Rights Reserved. Writing not permitted for reposting, transcription, translation or use with AI technologies.

[edensrose]

˚◞❀˳ a proper farewell

god that title sounds dramatic as fuck so let me just clear things up immediately: no, I'm not leaving tumblr, I will still be very manageable to reach and interact. what I am drifting away from is the tolkien fandom — and since this place, despite my hardships, has meant so much to me - I decided to give it a proper little farewell, to the people who made everything count. along with a little explanation for my decision while shedding light on my experience. ( I'll try to be brief )

I joined the tolkien fandom while writing for thranduil, it's here I gained my following in the fanbase and things went quite smoothly. however, upon beginning to write for mairon, then melkor and then later the ainur — I saw an increase in hate anons. something I have experienced before, natural of a multi fandom blog, but never to this degree. initially I assumed it was because I was simply growing larger as a blog, and perhaps that is the reason — but from what I noticed, I was battling with a bunch of chronically online people who simply could not handle my love for. . . "problematic characters"

I never understood it, really. I never saw other ainur blogs getting the hate I did - I guess I'll truly never know. had I done something? was my writing just not good enough? were my vibes off? over the time I've been called things like two faced, fake, a romanticiser of abuse, lazy for not filing out requests, been told I shouldn't write reader inserts, told to kms and other graphic incidents ( such as people sending death threats and actual gore to my inbox ). this branched from burner accounts to anons, and I could just never understand why me. a quick gander at the #clownon tag and you'll find some of the instances in which I've been harassed.

I genuinely thought my writing was the issue.

which demotivated me from writing for quite some time. could I have turned anon off? sure, but that would have meant that the anons I'd frequently interact with would most likely not come around anymore. it meant a decline in requests, it meant just a crippling factor to my blog in general, so I chose to ignore. but it got hard to eventually. I was bullied for liking a god with big wings just because for crying out loud.

I've tried to fake being okay. fake being strong and unwavering about the hate, but I just couldn't anymore. and that's okay.

it wasn't all tears and hardships though. I have made very good friends through the tolkien fandom, many of which I consider close. from @bluezenzennie to @kiatheinsomniac — @a-contemplation-upon-flowers , @cilil , @someoneinthestars and so so many more. it'd take me forever to tag and honestly my heart is squeezing so much listing these few down already. they made fandom fun, whether it was our silly little play fights or collabs or you name it. those of you that have spent time to tell me about your day on anon or send in the nicest of things. I haven't forgotten them, and I cherish them, but it's time for me to go

am I sad? fucking of course. a part of me found so much comfort here and in these characters. I've spent hours on end developing lore for aus or designing aesthetics for writing — just writing and pumping out content or blogs, everything and anything I could do. and while I don't regret those times - the way I've been treated in response hurts. which is why I've made this decision.

I'm growing as a person too. I'm writing a book now, I've got an oc blog to promote that book that I'm working hard on ( @valentine-cafe ) , things are looking good. does this mean I'm just gonna disappear? of course not. I plan on staying around, getting back into request writing ( for other fandoms ) and still interacting and supporting my tolkien moots and friends. will I be writing or creating content for tolkien? probably not. at least not in the foreseeable future. the characters I once loved and cherished have now been ruined for me. I've been made to feel embarrassed for loving manwe and namo to the degree that I have, and I don't see myself being able to write for ainur without thinking of all the shit I've gotten for doing so.

regardless, I'll be here still. and while I might not be your local valarfucker anymore, I hope to be your rose still 🩷 thank you so much for two and a half years, I love you all dearly

[thetypingpup]

Curse you tumblr😠✊🏿✊🏿/lh

First off, I love the new aesthetic on the blog 🫶. It’s so cute and also kinda a cool contrast to the courage (even though she is a queen who I love dearly). The courage gives me more warmer season vibes compared to this which feels more wintery vibes.

Second, basically my hard hours ask was about general menaces to society/criminals crazy form Hongjoong and Yeosang going to visit their partner after a night of chaos. Either sneaking in through the window (cause adrenaline) or if they have the patience, using the key their partner gave them. Then just going to town on them😩. Like real “had a rough time so I need to put my face in between yo legs to fix it” type beat.

Third, since I’m already here, making myself known/lh. I’d also like to throw in rebel leaders seonghwa and his partner‼️‼️. Omg, big brain moment where it’s mommy! Rebel leader Seonghwa 😩. They can be monogamous or this can be an open relationship with the rest of the ateez rebellion gang. Wait, dots are connecting, everyone in the group is mommy🫠. Or you could switch it up with some of them being more submissive. Either way, I’m eating/lh

I swear I’m about to leave but siren hongjoong or San ‼️‼️🫠🫠🫠

I hope I didn’t overload you. Here is to hoping this gets to you🫶 stay wonderful.

note to self bring courage back for the spring ✍🏾

wow ok circling back to crazy form i haven't been crazy form minded in a bit 😅 buuuuuuut, an open relationship with all of them sounds perfect. like a continuation of bouncy where you do mayhem with different members at different times. mommy!hwa in this context just speaks to my damn soul just having all this chaos around, and then you calling him mommy in the middle of all of that, something about that speaks to my soul.

now with hongjoong and yeosang they could visit you back at your place...or y'all could fuck in that alleyway where the spraypainting was. like as soon as y'all lose the cops you're still hopped up on adrenaline and decide to be even more risky, which leads to hongjoong eating you out on the hood of the car and yeosang deciding to join in and start making out with you while playing with your boobs. yea...yea that makes sense to me 😅. and especially if we think about this happening after the van, yeosang would definitely be more bold and pent up and more eager to toy with you out in the open. hell he might even fuck you before hongjoong does, but not before making you cum a few times on his tongue ofc 😏

[doberbutts]

I've had a long post churning in my head about this but I'm kind of chewing on something else first.

Now I've mentioned but not really gone into detail about how people have decided to simply Make Shit Up about me and for the most part I've just ignored it and blocked the worst offenders. Sometimes I'm not allowed to reblog a random completely unrelated post in the wild because someone I've never even heard of has blocked me but for the most part it's pretty whatever. Since blocking the worst offenders my askbox has been fairly peaceful.

However... I want to talk about this.

Part one of "people making shit up"- it's interesting that I've gone on record saying again and again that rape is possibly the worst thing you could ever do to someone, that I have close family members and friends and former partners who've been raped and I find the problem deeply personal, that I've broken up with partners because I did not trust them not to rape me, that my first sexual experience if it was anyone else I'd call it assault but I struggle to think that way about it for myself, that I would rather die than be raped, that I really dislike a lot of media that depicts certain sexual scenes in positive manner because of a solid lack of consent... and all of that is very findable in a search of my blog for the word.

What you will also find is an argument with terfs on whether consensual sex with strangers who don't tell you anything about themselves is rape, and a solid "I do not give a fuck what consenting adults do in their spare time".

Similarly, the closest thing to pedophilia you'll get is a discussion of how a church member preyed on me when I was 16 and how my parents intervened before it progressed past a certain point, as one of the main factors in distancing myself from the Christian faith before my total break from the church, and, similarly, overall personal disgust for witnessing ageplay but same "I do not give a fuck what consenting adults do in their spare time" and "please be at least somewhat normal about fanfiction and use your fucking brains I beg you". Also very easily findable with a basic search on my blog.

Also interesting that "someone who is in dogblr" believes I hate or hated pit bulls. I don't want one, that's true. I'm honest about their use in dog fighting both historical and modern, that's true too. I do hate scotties and corsos due to personal experience. I'm very upfront about that too. When I get talking about pit bulls I generally do bring up the racial aspect, because I'm black, and I care about black topics, and our dogs are certainly a topic. I like the aesthetic of a good solid amstaff. I've trained several and they've been both some of the best and some of the worst clients I've had. There's a gamebred pit that spent every weekend in my house over spring/summer while I helped his owner on a favor. I also don't want the risk of dog aggression if it's not also a doberman. I've planned my pack dynamic out pretty well to avoid that and the risk is too great for me to try it.

This one I've brought up before but this is the one that's probably the worst. A post discussing how WHITE feminists were putting "black lives matter" in their bio and yet saying stupid shit like "men don't have to worry walking alone at night" and "men aren't in danger walking down the street" as if police killings of black men aren't literally a major reason why we even have the black lives matter chant in the first place. Somehow got translated to "black women are more harmful to black men" and yet when I asked for receipts for what racist shit I say about black women none were given. Literally the world's worst whisper down the lane.

Me: raceplay is weird as fuck to me and I don't like it at all, I block on sight when I see it, also the government shouldn't control what you as a consenting adult do in the privacy of your own home as long as it's with other consenting adults

Them: so you think raceplay is okay

Me: how dare you say we piss on the poor

I do find it interesting that I don't think I've tagged a single one of my posts transandrophobia and also I rarely use any word to describe what my experience is, really the only times I ever use the word is to say "hey it doesn't seem to matter what word we use, we get shouted down regardless" or if I've like. Reblogged from someone else who's used that word. But cool I guess.

Also I've spoken to Saint like twice and it was to clarify something being claimed about him. Like I don't think it's a crime to talk to the guy but also. It's weird that I'm "regularly involved" with someone who I haven't talked to directly in over a year and when I did it was to ask if something was true or get his side of the story. Also are we just... doing guilt by association now? Because talking to someone on good terms doesn't inherently mean you 100% believe or condone everything that other person does or says. It means you're able to have a conversation and treat others with basic respect and human decency before deciding how you judge them.

Anyway. There's not really a point to this. It's something that I see kick around from time to time when one of my posts gets popular and as said before generally speaking I just block the worst offenders and continue ignoring it.

But really like. People do just make shit up. If anything is ever claimed about someone ESPECIALLY when it's something that can be weaponized? Ask for proof. And if no proof is given then most likely it's a case of Making Shit Up. I would LOVE proof of any of these claims. Please, by all means. This is a sideblog that cannot leave replies or asks and I can count on one hand how many posts I've deleted and still have plenty of fingers left over. So prove it. Prove that I am this person.

Otherwise, I know it isn't true. You know it isn't true. So there isn't any reason to continue to spread it outside of pure maliciousness and bullying. High school level tactics.

[patronsaintofhomosandpain]

» [Misguided Ghosts - Paramore] «

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𝕴𝖒𝖕𝖔𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕾𝖞𝖓𝖉𝖗𝖔𝖒𝖊 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝕮𝖔𝖒𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖙𝖆𝖇𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖞 𝖔𝖋 𝕲𝖎𝖛𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝖀𝖕

══ஓ๑🦇๑ஓ══

I've been hesitant to post here. I haven't known what to talk about, and I've been anxiously picking through what would be the perfect first post, the perfect place to start.

I've come to the conclusion that there's never a perfect place to start, whether it's the start of your story, meeting someone for the first time, or hell entering a roundabout! There is no such thing, and you'd think I'd know that by now.

My father once told me, "If you're uncertain about where you're stepping, toss something onto your path."

He was making sure I didn't bust my ass on a particularly questionable jungle gym, but I feel like it applies here as well.

When I first started my story I was just having fun, throwing shit on my path all day just to see what would stick. When I decided writing was going to be a full-time job, that's when shit got real.

I was just out of high school and all I knew was authors didn't look like me! Authors look like James Patterson and Stephen King, authors are scholars and socialites. They aren't some smart-ass sixteen-year-old kid with neon orange hair and nothing to their name but a story they wrote on their phone and a go-fuck-yourself attitude.

Even now, starting this blog, I don't feel like I'm in the right place. I know the kinds of people that run book blogs, they keep everything nice and tidy, they always have fun aesthetical pictures to perfectly backdrop their words, they're cheery and sweet and they always have something encouraging to say.

They're not lying on their carpet, high on cold medicine for a sinus infection, typing their posts out on their phone keyboard at 1 AM.

It's anxiety provoking and isolating as fuck to think like that, it's self-sabotage and I need to knock that shit off, but the truth of that matter is those thoughts happen! No matter who you are, or what you're doing, it's natural to doubt yourself because you've never been here and/or done this thing before. Unfortunately, there's no guidebook (despite multiple books titled "how to write your book") or magic crystal ball telling you how to do it perfectly because no one is you and no one can do it like you, and until you do it you'll never know how it comes out.

"But how can I do this thing if I've never done it before?"

Do you think in whenever the fuck BC they knew how to perform heart surgery? No! They cut open Mr. Caveman Dinosaur Guy and diddled his heart a little until they learned something! Sure, a few people died at first, but the good news is that more than likely, you probably won't!

Imposter syndrome is so unbelievably real that it hurts, and unfortunately, the only cure for it is to let it win and give up. While that might be a reasonable solution to keep your wits about you, it isn't a sustainable one.

Giving up is like cigarettes, it's comforting, it eases your anxieties, but, at the end of the day, it's not good for you and like everything else will kill you.

Sure, it helps in the moment, but it isn't a cure.

You ever hear the phrase "shit or get off the pot"?

Well, someday you're eventually going to have to shit. It doesn't have to be today, take your time, enjoy some delicious bran muffins, but someday your time is going to come! So keep your head up and do it on your own terms.

And, unless you are Leonardo DiCaprio in Catch Me If You Can, the only person your imposter syndrome is hurting is you, so let it go.

Easier said than done, but as long as nobody is traveling back in time to stop your parents from meeting, never doubt yourself.

You're way better than you think you are.

That's the tip of the week. Write it down.

El que no arriesga, no gana

- Izzy 🖤

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PS

If you follow the second link I put with the song, it's to the genius lyrics page where Hayley Williams talks about a similar thing. I don't know, I just felt like it was powerful :)

[brre-som]

THE HALLWAY

It was such a long long time since my last post in this app.

I had a Tumblr in 2012-2014, I totally forgot about it but, my sister came to my place today, and we were searching for our old Skyblog (a french blog platform used by 90's baby's in the early 2000) I couldn't find mine so I decided to search for my Tumblr and I found it.

It was really strange to see it... Especially with the fact that this times was though times for me (I think, for the most of us actually). It was my sad girl/ anorexia/ depress teenager era. I never realized before, how sad I was but I finally did! By scrolling, reading the tags and of course trying to interpret each images that my adult eyes and past photographer and cinema student is now able to read

So I thought it will be a good idea to describe to you how I felt while scrolling down those dark pages.

First thought: I was laughing at my old profile picture, I was light blonde with big round sunglasses and an oversize Boy London shirt that I was wearing as a dress. A real Tumblr sad girl (but a bit hipster). I started scrolling and a picture of an unknown man wearing tattoos appears, in black and white.

I thinked: such a Fuck boy, with this attitude. The exact same than my ex .... Anyway it's kinda funny how immature I was to be attracted to this kind of person. Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking about style I'm really talking about the attitude.

I keeped scrolling and it was almost only this type of posts. It was all black in white. I first thought it was for the overall aesthetic. I was just hyping myself by saying to my sister "I always was addicted to tattoos and body transformation"

Second thought: as I was going down it became quite sadder. black and white pictures are still everywhere, quotes about how our lives make no sense, how wobbly our place on society is. Lot of cigarettes pics and se*x ones... Like if I was trying to make it look edgy. I used to be a heavy smoker since my 14yo (I recently stopped) but I never really liked nude photography. I was raised in a bashful family, we don't trust in any God, it was just our old mindset. I used to see se*x as something dirty, shameful, almost like a sin. This kind of images really make me uncomfortable when I watch them... But now that I'm a grown woman I understand the beauty behind it and even the artistic choices. I can enjoy it even if it's still a bit uncomfortable for me. I feel like am a real stalker watching these vulnerable people.

I thinked: was I matrixed by my nymphomaniac ex or was I just trying to fit somewhere between the rebel mind of a teenager and the beginning of the adulthood. And this nicotine addiction... Disturbing.

Third thoughts: I keep diving deeper and deeper, and all I can see is Anna, everywhere, lost and surrounded by sadness. Heavy sadness. Hashtags were saying "too fat", "too big", "not enough". Between them, the figure of the Joker facing the Batman was everywhere. It was literally the future me watching the tumblr me. Hoping to deliver something with the need to break it before.

I thinked: I was so fascinated by this fictional tandem, but I never understood why it fascinated me before, during those times. But I think that My young brain knew that everything that can rise from demolition always rise stronger and better but I couldn't admit it, so I was sharing it like subliminal messages to my own self: You destroy yourself to the maximum, so you can wash it away easier later. Like a deep spring cleaning.

It wasn't a weakness. I'm sensitive and empathetic but I've never been weak. Those hard time was just the crysalis to the caterpillar. Everyone got their own healing process, some are tough and drowns the most fragile souls into the inferno like an unpassable test. Some are easier but can never bring a real value to your own evolution.

At the end this Tumblr used to show my journey, healing from my relationship with the anorexia and that toxic ex boyfriend (what a wonderful duo) in an abstract way, using images instead of words so only myself could understand the deepest secret that my mind was hiding from my beloved family and friends.

Picture by brre_som

[cagedchoices]

Hiiii I'm really sorry to bother you but I noticed on your old blog you used to have a rule that said not to treat your character like Jesse Pinkman. I think I get why its a concern but I'm wondering why it doesn't say that anymore and also I'm curious to know about what you think the differences between Caleb and Jesse are

omg ok first of all bb, you are certainly not bothering me by asking questions. i appreciate being asked thank you 🥰

secondly uh, i removed that disclaimer from my rules bc i felt like i didn't really need it anymore. it does still apply but i really only had it up bc when i was still fairly new to writing caleb i would get a lot of anons making br.ba jokes. so naturally there would be a lot of people pretending to be fuckin walter white in my inbox trying to tell caleb "let's cook" and like "jesse stop screwing around with robots and get back to work" and shit and like. yeah it's a fun little joke. ONCE. 😬

when you're seeing it multiple times a day/week it loses charm real quick. so i decided to be kinda petty about it and be like 'y'all know that caleb is NOT jesse right?' and i did two things. i flat out stopped responding to br.ba anons and i added that warning to my rules. and it seemed like it worked! i stopped getting flooded and my inbox was allowed to know peace again. but like i said, i don't think i really need it anymore because it should just be kind of a given, right? i mean i'm sure this has happened to other people before and will continue to happen bc that's the internet and unfortunately some people have no concept of boundaries and others just struggle with understanding that they might be making someone uncomfortable without intending to.

but like. to think of a popular example which i'm sure has happened before and will surely happen in the future i just think of a mun who writes joel from the last of us and maybe they like using pedro pascal's portrayal and they enjoy using him as an fc. now imagine that rper getting an inbox filled with anon messages treating joel as totally indistinguishable from the mandalorian. telling him he's gotta go find grogu or asking him why he abandoned his son for ellie or something along those lines. there are some GLARING differences between joel miller and din djarin. they're clearly not the same character.

so it might be funny to the person sending the messages and they're probably just having fun like. i'm sure they don't mean anything bad by it. but lemme tell ya, it's not as much fun to the mun on the receiving end. and in my case it sent me into a lil bit of a writer crisis like 'oh fuck is caleb nichols just a carbon copy of jesse pinkman is that how other people i write with see him?? what can i do to make him stand apart and be different without pulling him away from westworld canon too much??'

so anyway that's the rant over with. to answer the second half of this, caleb and jesse are different people. they just are. they do have a lot in common ranging from appearance to basic personality traits to the way they use body language, but they aren't completely the same. they come from different backgrounds which were influenced by various different factors.

jesse is more creative, he's an artist at heart and he has an artist's mindset and that's a kind of freedom to him. he expresses himself mainly through aesthetics. he draws, he wears a colorful wardrobe that really makes him stand out, the first time walter tells him that cooking crystal is chemistry jesse argues back that it is art and he has his signature style and he resents that walt forces him to change it. the reason jesse got involved in the drug trade is predominantly because it's the one place he is allowed and encouraged to express himself freely through art.

caleb on the other hand, is a soldier and he has a soldier's mindset toward most things. he is/was for the most part content with being told what to do next, following orders, sticking to a game plan. he expresses himself mainly through acts of service in canon, particularly to family as we see with his mom in the hospital and when he leaves his wife and daughter behind to go try and put a stop to the war that's coming. he wants to help, he wants to keep everyone safe and the only way he really knows how to do that is to fight.

i'd also say that while jesse and caleb are both highly empathetic and sensitive to the feelings of others, caleb is more stoic about it. i'm not totally sure if that's just how he is naturally or if he's so wracked and troubled by traumatic experiences and was trained to swallow those emotions in the military or otherwise learned to shut down but like. where jesse is always emoting something and never just sitting completely still and blank, caleb seems more comfortable with staying quiet and not always necessarily showing what's on his mind at a given moment.

and there are or course many more things i can say about specific differences but i feel like i've made this post long enough and gone on a scattered tangent so like. i might explore it way more in depth at a later date. ❤️

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

i've been trying to work on getting more specific about criteria i set my boundaries around and adjacent--namely around actionable behaviors as opposed to just things that tend to be accompanied by them, like 'if you engage with me to argue whether a dynamic i consider to be abusive is actually abuse i will block you' instead of just 'if you don't think [X specific dynamic] is abuse DNI.' but man sometimes there are things that are context-specific enough that if you don't specify that particular instance people are unlikely to know what you're talking about.

('if you call pericles a nazi i will block you for holocaust denial, [short summary or link to explanation]' is a personal example that comes to mind. i can name the specific shitty trope--'The Nazis Were Gay is a homophobic myth and it is holocaust denial, cut it out'--but if someone hasn't already made that connection with pericles, they are..... probably not going to unless you lay it out yourself. and it will probably involve a Lot of Context when your DNI is really just not the place to stop for a thousand-word essay about the tropes and framing and character dynamics in a piece of media, even if it's something you're happy to infodump about elsewhere.)

('if [criteria relating to the All Germans are Nazis trope or nazis otherwise getting thrown in for bad guy shock value] i will block you' i think gets closer to the broader issue--because hoooly shit there is so much nastiness that inevitably comes with, once again usually holocaust denial--but i don't even know where i'd start with framing that. 'if you do/don't engage critically with [X]' is a nothingburger and it's worse than useless. but like, chances are VERY good that if your policy is not 'look real fucking hard at the presence of nazis in a piece of media, what it means relative to the other elements of the story, whether invoking them is appropriate or even relevant, and the author's intent in doing so' you are going to have takes i do not want to engage with and think are really shitty to spread.)

and there's also not much nuanced shorthand language around for things like 'if you have [opinion] and didn't realize why it might be shitty before seeing it pointed out, i'll be understanding of that, but if you're going to double down when it's laid out in front of you i will block you.' or, for that matter, 'if you make unsolicited comments about my abuse history while discussing fiction i will bite your fucking head off and post about it publicly on my blog, with url attached. if you don't want that then stay off my goddamn posts and mind your business.'

there's also a really important distinction, i think, between the contexts in which you're laying these boundaries. you can't expect every rando who reblogs a post of yours that got big to click through and read through every single boundary you have to make sure you won't block them, but if they're going to follow you it is much more relevant to them to know if they'll just get blocked (or decide they want to block you). and some person following you to occasionally reblog aesthetics or fanart from a distance is a different level of engagement than someone who might take part in meta discussions on your posts, or draw fanart of your AU, or get in contact with you outside of the platform where you met to make friends. it's reasonable to have different expectations for strangers on the street, people you run into at the coffee shop now and then, and people you invite over to your house.

like.... in general i feel like DNI is just not the right name for it, because that presents a binary that might not always fit. if someone has an opinion i'm bothered by and don't want to engage with directly, but will go 'oh, huh i didn't think of it like that' when seeing an explanation from the outside, that's not a 'never breathe in my direction again' offense to me. if anything i think most people are basically decent and would like to be decent, and it makes me happy to be able to provide someone with the perspective to make an informed choice for how to do that.

as it is you're just kind of boxed into the corner of FUCK OFF GTFO GO AWAY, which is even more unhelpful when it comes to communicating criteria where you Really Fucking Mean It, like 'if you think it's acceptable to tell someone to kill themself then fuck off, fuck all the way off, stay the hell away from me.' that 'gtfo or don't' binary takes away the capacity for that emphasis, and honestly also contributes to the extreme black-and-white toxicity of fandom and internet spaces in general this past decade or so. if 'didn't pick up on a subtle depiction of abuse at first and was kind of insensitive about it' and 'literal suicide baiting' are exactly the same degree of Bad, then either the suicide baiting seems trivial, or people are going to feel Attacked and like they must be a terrible person for any slightly imperfect good-faith thought or opinion they might have, or have just not thought through.

in the latter case, even if they end up going with the Other Opinion(tm) because feeling attacked put them off, fandom these days is a nightmare of systemic abuse which weaponizes that binary. seeing it replicated even from people who are trying to push back against it--even if it's because those people have been pushed into a corner and aggressive Get the Fuck Away from Me is, understandably, all they have left--just reinforces that there is no other model for this, that the abusive framework for how to navigate the world is all there is. i hate the idea of contributing to that, and i wish i weren't having to feel out the alternative by myself while already being so goddamn burned out on the whole thing.

and like.... i think 'boundaries' as a term is definitely getting warmer, but by itself doesn't quite communicate its nature as a Thing for the specific purposes of navigating socmed spaces. just. hm.

[astrobydalia]

🌸OBSERVATIONS!! (finally lmao)🌱

Credit: Tumblr blog @astrobydalia

It's been a long time coming! So happy for spring being finally here! Here's the long ass observation post you guys asked for. Since it's quite a big amount of observations, I've decided it'd be a good idea to number them so that it's easier to reference them. As always, enjoy them!

🌸 1. Lilith in the 2nd house can indicate something fishy going on with the relationship between the native’s parents.

🌱 2. Malefic placements such as pluto, chiron, Saturn or Lilith in the 12th indicates a lot of skeletons in the closet when it comes to family and family history

🌸 3. Chiron in Aries/1st house or Leo/5th house is kind of bitch placement. The person basically feels like they can’t be themselves and there’s a lot of self-denial and/or not accepting themselves, how they really are, what they really want, etc. Lots of self-esteem issues

🌱 4. People with sexual placements in the 2nd house (Mars, Venus, Lilith, Eros, ruler of the 8th house) base their self-worth on how sexually attractive they are. If they don't feel sexually desirable to everyone, they feel like they're shit

🌸 5. Lilith is what people think Pluto/Scorpio is!!!! All that stuff about magnetic, sexual and intoxicating but dangerous? Lilith.

🌱 6. Scorpio/Pluto in 4th could mean that the person had to work hard to survive something growing up. It could be poverty, their parents’ expectations, an early trauma, etc. Whatever the situation is, the native felt like they grew up in a high-stress environment where they had to endure and survive

🌸 7. When it comes to degrees, the higher the degree, the bigger or stronger the effect. For example Leo degrees (5º, 17º, 29º) are fame degrees. 5th degree would give small fame, 17th degree would be normal and significant fame or recognition inside the person’s field and 29th degree is moreso widespread or permanent fame

🌱 8. Saturn in the 5th house is a huge indicator of turning your hobby into your job. Also these people can be very awkward in their personality

🌸 9. I’ve noticed people with Neptune in the 6th (maybe 2nd) house may have been hospitalized and if Uranus or Pluto are placed here also indicates getting surgery or operations for health reasons

🌱 10. People with Uranus or Pluto in the 1st, 2nd or conjunct the ASC could get surgery due to aesthetic reason

🌸 11. Mercury dominant people (or strong Gemini energy in the chart) like to have or get things quick and easy. For example they prefer a straight forward summary over an in-depth and elaborated explanation with too many details

🌱 12. Your moon sign shows how you see your past. Your 4th house represent how you see your childhood. But your moon represents under which light you always view your past and everything that has happened in your life in general. It also shows the type of stuff from your past you tend to focus on. Since Cancer and Pisces represent past and remenaicence, that's why Cancer and Pisces moons have trouble getting over the past.

🌸 13. Your 10th house on the other hand is how you see your future. Whenever someone asks you “where you see yourself in 5 years?” your 10th house is the one that’ll be answering that question

🌱 14. Gemini moon/mars are the LEAST likely to hold grudges (unless chart says otherwise)

🌸 15. The house where you have your Neptune indicates the themes you tend to lie about, don’t give much info, say stuff about it that are misleading etc. and in consequence people might not have a clear/correct idea of this part of your life

🌱 16. Virgo risings rarely or basically never pose for pictures. They just look straight forward to the camera, sometimes smile and maybe make a small gesture like putting one hand in their pocket or tilt their head but that’s it. (Virgo = minimalism)

🌸 17. Scorpios really don’t give a single fuck they just DON’T 😭💀 Remember this sign is all or nothing, they either care too or don't care AT ALL

🌱 18. I said it once and I’ll say to a hundred times more: Geminis are not two-faced, it’s LIBRA!! Seriously Libras are the FAKEST people I’ve ever met. Why? Because it's ruled by the planet of love (Venus), which means Libra has a knack for being liked by everyone and making everyone feel liked. HOWEVER Libra is an AIR sign and air represents mind, NOT feelings. In conclusion, Libra can make you feel "loved" (venus) and still not give a damn about you bc its air nature makes them prone to emotional detachment. That's why they are able to roast you and make it look like they're complimenting you, specially when they have Scorpio mercury.

🌸 19. Just like you look at where’s the ruler of your rising sign to get more info on your rising, check the ruler of your Sun sign for more info on your personal identity (check sign and house). For ex. I have Virgo Sun in the 9th. Ruler of Virgo=Mercury. I have mercury in Libra in the 10th house which makes me more serious (10th house) and diplomatic/people pleaser (Libra)

🌱 20. If you found that you “couldn’t” do what’s previously described because you’re a Leo sun, check the degree and decan of your Sun

🌸 21. I’ve noticed mercury retrograde people are the type of individuals who always know exactly the right things to say. You’ll always see them take a couple of seconds before answering but they tend to give very good responses

🌱 22. I’ve noticed many women with Virgo Venus/Sun/MC/Lilith have been slut-shamed at some point of their life or they’ve been seen as promiscuous/sexual/etc.

🌸 23. Capricorn moons are not emotionless machines. The thing with these natives is that their mothers treated them like an adult the second they came out of the womb, so basically they skipped the “love and affection” stage and went straight to the “grow up” stage, but they can love really hard and real deep (Capricorn is deep down a very sentimental sign). They are very ride or die people tbh, they are very patient, accepting and understanding

🌱 24. I've noticed that people at first deny their rising sign in Vedic astrology, but eventually they end up accepting it and they actually end up relating to it a lot. I feel like this is because our rising sign in Vedic astrology is usually the sign of our 12th house in Western astrology, which leads me to believe that our 12th house sign is not our shadow side but more like our deep subcontious personality and that's why we have a hard time accepting it when we see it as our rising sign in Vedic astrology. It's like your rising sign (in western) is the director of the play but your 12th house is the energy that previously wrote the script

🌸 25. So many celebrities have moon in the 11th house. Also this placement indicates that you had a mother that put you out there constantly like posting everything about you on social media, bringing you to big events or your mom was “famous” in some capacity

🌱26. Gemini risings tend to believe everything they are told. More specifically, once they find someone that knows a little bit more than them they’ll believe everything they teach them and will most likely rely on them intellectually, for advice, guidance, etc. This is bc they have DSC in Sagittarius which makes them see the people they associate with as masters and mentors while, as a Gemini rising, they identify as an apprentice.

🌸27. Both 8th house and 12th house have been associated with secrets. The different is that the 8th house represents what you CONTIOUSLY and deliberately hide from others and most likely deny to yourself (or not, depends on the person). 12th house on the other hand represents subconscious, things that are hidden even from you and you didn’t even know were hidden. 4th house is not necessarily secrets, it represents privacy, like when people have a sanctuary to just relax, unwind and feel secure, that’s the 4th house.

🌱28. Sun or Moon in the 4th house will make you a sociable but private person.

🌸29. Sun or moon in the 8th house will make you an intriguing and mysterious person.

🌱30. Sun or moon the 12th house makes you a very elusive or wishy-washy person

🌸31. I’ve seen many Scorpio sun/moon/mars/rising individuals obsessed with the idea of being prepared for a catastrophe. They could be the type to, for example, have some saved cash just in case something bad happens with their bank money, have a backup account just in case their main one gets deleted, could have a “leave before you get left” philosophy, etc.

🌱32. Is it just me or the astro community talks a lot about Aries moons???

🌸33. I’ve noticed people with 4th house in Virgo could have been raised in a very judgemental household where there was lots of taboos and prejudice as to what’s right and what’s not and the family was too preoccupied with a perfect and immaculate reputation. For example could have been raised with values such as “only criminals wear tattoos” or “you should stay celibate till marriage or else you’re a whore”, etc. and if the native broke those rules they could have been very criticized and almost loathed by the family. They native could have been highly criticized in general by their family

🌱34. I’ve noticed women that have their moon harshly aspecting Pluto, Uranus and Mars or overall have a very afflicted moon tend to have very painful period cramps

🌸35. Something I have noticed with Venus or Moon conjunct Saturn people is that the concept of unconditional love sounds like alien language to them. That of course doesn’t mean they can’t love but they have this deep belief that they have to achieve something in order to deserve love and stuff like that

🌱36. Also, I just noticed that people with Saturn conjunct sun/moon/Venus/ASC, Capricorn big 3 or Capricorn degrees in personal placements have gone through IT man, specially on an internal level. I've noticed going through depression is a common theme for people with this Capricorn/Saturn influence

🌸37. Virgo Suns could often struggle to find balance between having healthy ego and being humble.

🌱38. Also people with Virgo+Leo energy are the MOOOOST judgmental people out there. Imagine ego mixed with a sense of knowing what’s correct. They tend to believe they’re morally superior and easily liable people as inferior

🌸39. The underdeveloped energy of a sign asimilates negative traits of its sister sign. For example underdeveloped Virgo is overly perfectionist and judgmental to the point where they have unrealistic expectations (Pisces)

🌱40. On the other hand the developed version of a sign is balanced out by understanding its sister sign. For example Leo knows they are unique and special and deserves recognition but understands everyone is also unique in their own way (Aquarius)

🌸41. I’ve noticed a person can very easily manifest the stereotypical characteristics of the sign that naturally rules the house where their chart ruler is. For example if someone’s chart ruler (ruler of the ASC) is in the 7th house the person can easily manifest stereotypical characteristics of Libra like being a people pleaser

🌱42. Sagittarius ASC/Mars people are all fun, amicable and outgoing.... until they don’t get their way. They will get away from people and situations that won’t give them what they want and they can genuinely dislike people solely because those people don’t let them have their way. They tend to go around life like they have a free pass to get away with everything they want.

🌸43. People with ASC-Neptune aspects don’t have a very reliable vision of reality or themselves to be honest. I don’t know how people with this aspect haven’t lost their mind already. They are prone to subconsciously manipulating or easily getting manipulated. With hard aspects this is a lot more obvious but I’ve noticed with easy aspects this energy tends to go almost unnoticed and they easily get away with stuff

🌱44. Have seen many famous people with North node in the 2nd, 5th, 11th and 12th houses specially

🌸45. Air risings or air dominance with Sagittarius placements/degrees are people who love cartoons/animations/videogames regardless of their age.

🌱46. When I got into astrology I didn’t understand why Sun is in detriment in Libra, but oh man... All Libras I’ve met had HUGE issues with trusting themselves. They doubt themselves 24/7 and that’s not even an exaggeration and I’ve noticed they actually may have grown up doubting themselves for some reason or they had a family (their dad) that caused this feeling in them. Also I’ve seen that those Libras with Scorpio placements feel like they have to hide something about themselves otherwise they’ll be rejected. Yes they are endlessly charming, but that's because they have essentially created their personality around the desire of being liked/accepted. They always need to feel they have SOMEONE. Their sense of self, INDIVIDUALITY, independence and assertiveness is lost in the process. Unless they have fire and specially Aries placements to balance this out they can feel like they have no personality and that’s why they are often perceived as fake or shallow.

🌸47. Literally ALL Virgo placements one way or another will always suggest a way to solve your problems when giving emotional support

🌱48. I have a theory that, since 4th house is how you were raised, your home and your parents, your 10th house is how you’d be as a parent yourself and the type of home you’ll create yourself

🌸49. Contrary to my expectations, I’ve seen priests having a much more prominent 4th house (many times combined with 8th house/Scorpio energy) than 12th house. People with 12th house placements or stellium seem to prefer artistic fields rather than classic spirituality

🌱50. The house where you have your Pluto is a house you just can NOT take lightly EVER. This area of your life feels like a heavy topic to you in some way (you are either obsessed with it, find It traumatic, get extremely defensive over it, find it spiteful, you feel everything goes wrong, etc, etc.) Can also apply to the house where you have the sign of scorpio

🌸51. In synastry, Venus falling in the 12th house creates a healing dynamic in the relationship, the connection can feel cathartic specially for the house person. The house person might tend to always be comforted by the venus person’s support, always feel better (or even energetically “cleansed”) after being with them. The venus person never judges the house person and accepts them and is always willing to be there.

🌱52. I’ve noticed this pattern in people with mutable moons where they have absent mothers in some shape or form. Their mother is very inconsistent, she always comes and goes. Very often the native may have felt like their mother always “left them be” (virgo moon moms put restrictions but eventually are rather flexible)

🌸53. People with cardinal moons have bossy mothers. In many cases they can have the type of mother that is constantly making decisions for them, like their mother decides what/where they’re going to study for example (the house tells what type of things the mother tends to make decisions on).

🌱54. People with fixed moons have possesive and protective moms. While mutable moons have absent mothers, natives with fixed moons have mothers that are ALWAYS there in some shape or form. At the very least the influence of the mother is always there and they always have this sense of “loyalty” towards their mom.

Credit: Tumblr blog @astrobydalia

That's it for now, next observation post is just as long but much better, stay tuned and safe loves 💕

[case-electris]

Thoma smut (x male reader)

How did he get here? It was just abit of bribery. But somehow some idiot from the tenryou commission had tied him up. Not only that but they also dragged him into this back ally. Archons what was going to happen to him.

"hey, Orokamono what cha doing down here this isn't your assigned route is it?" that sounds like... Y/n the one of the generals of the tenryou commission? "o-oh sir y/n I was bringing this law breaker to the jail" Orokamono said yanking tohma towards himself. "really? If I remember correctly, the jail is not down this dark ally. You should get back to your route I'll take him to the jail instead."

Oh archons your voice dose things to him. your incredibly hot too. Orokamono ran off out of the ally. Helping tohma to his feet, but not untying him. "tohma... You know i see it when you stare at me for a bit too long... It's almost like you love me..." whispering into Thomas's ear. It made tohma's face flush bright red.

You rubbed the cloth at tohma's groin, earning a small moan from the boy. "you like that tohma?" you asked. Tohma rapidly nodded his head. "do you want me to continue?" tohma nodded once more.

You took off tohma's pants and "ohohoho not wearing any underwear hu?" tohma blushed alot at that. You turned tohma to face the wall. Then out of the satchel you carried around you took out a chaos oculse

(One of these)

You then put it up tohma's ass "gah! Wha- what are you doing?" tohma said his vocals definitely going up. The buttplug slowly started vibrating. "hmp! ah-" "tohma,cutie let me hear you" you said peeling his hand of his mouth. you took off your pants and boxers,you then rammed into tohma. earning a slutty moan for the boy.

it had only been at lest 1 minuet and tohma had already came about 2 times. safe to say he was enjoying it. "ah- hmp! too- too much!" tohma whined. "already scumming to me hm, pretty boy?" you ask continuously ramming into him,not slowing down. not long after you also came.

you decided to find a better place to 'punish' tohma. somewhere preferably somewhere thats not a dark ally. so you dressed the two of you. and proceed to drag the fucked out (and tied up) tohma out of the ally. Only to get questioned by someone also part of the tenryou commission. "sir, why is tohma of the yashihiro commission tied up?" they asked. Only for you to reply with "oh, he just finished learning how to be a good boy".

when tohma finally returns to this sences he would most definitely get a earful if the rumors spread that y/n of the tenryou commmistion fucked him in the back allys.

(REPOST DUE TO ME CHANGING MY BLOG AESTHETIC)

[sneezemonster15]

you said kishi wrote a gay love story on purpose saying that the fact they invested so much in a 15 year long project is proof,

so why do all that and then ruin it at the end? have them be het, have children and create all that? what happened to the story 'they were so invested in'??

😳 Because it's shounen? What, did you expect them to get married in some gay ass ceremony with Sakura as their flower girl? Did you think they would kiss and Konoha would wolf whistle and throw rice at their heads? Did you really think that, that was a possibility? What are you even asking me? Guess you are new to my blog.

I will not repeat myself for your benefit, but you are welcome to go through my blog, the trials and tribulations of Kishi to continue writing a gay love story till the end, I repeat till the end because the last chapter is so utterly out of sync with preceding 699 chapters, you asking me this question seems almost surreal to me. But have at it.

However, it's not like having them be married to women and having children with them is such a proof of heterosexuality. No. The proof is in the narrative so fully rich with poetically and aesthetically placed nuances and twists and turns that assimilate so seamlessly with the development of Sasuke and Naruto's characters, that I don't have to look at a poorly manufactured and ridiculously inferior attempt of continuing to milk a gargantuan franchise for any fucking proof. Yes, that's what Boruto is.

And bless Kishi, who could have chosen to finally write Naruto and Sasuke as heterosexual in the sequel, but my dude still writes them like they are in love with each other while their actual wives either make do with twelve year long absences or sleep on their beds alone. We really don't need to know any of this for Boruto's sake but we still keep getting bombarded with throwbacks to SNS moments from part one and two. You think the producers aren't aware of this??

Look. It's really not that difficult a deduction. Like I always say, work with what you have. Solid facts. The fact is Kishimoto wrote 699 chapters dedicated to a love story between two male characters and that he didn't leave any stone unturned to tell us how they were made for each other visually, symbolically, narratively, like cosmic freaking lovers and this is all literally text. The haphazardly applied band aid that is the last chapter doesn't overturn any of that. Any conscientious reader or viewer should be able to see that.

People underestimate the process in which stories are written. Which is to say that they often ignore the deliberation with which an author decides to give us information about the plot and the characters. They don't question it, well if you don't question it, you won't understand it.

The fact is Kishimoto mindfully wrote a vastly intricate narrative that gently but routinely and firmly urged the audience to evaluate and revaluate the nature of Sasuke and Naruto's relationship in order to process the progression of the story. It is so well assimilated in this medium defined genre (shounen), that a younger, more inexperienced audience may still enjoy it without noticing the details that are so obvious, they are easy to miss. But a more mature audience will notice it. And marvel at the obviousness of the fine details. Naruto and Sasuke's story is a poetry of paradoxes. And trust me, it's a privilege to understand it in its finer details. I don't call it one of the greatest love stories in the world for nothing.

It's a coming of age story as well. Coming of age stories don't always end positively. Boruto does not read like a positive ending to me. Not for Naruto and Sasuke, the two heroes and survivors, who look so perennially dejected and defeated, Kishi makes a point of it. Why? Does this not scream investment? Why still be loyal to consistent characterization in a sequel that is not even about the two characters anymore?

Sigh...

The proof is in the pie. Like, please look nowhere else. It's all in there, just be more open, a bit curious. It's in text, subtext, visuals, like tbh, what I don't understand is how you miss it...

[askjerrydandridge]

Movies and series about vampires to recommend?🤔I want to expand my collection!

(( You have COME to the RIGHT place, I am thinking about making a master list of vampire stuff for you guys to go through and check them out for yourselves because I have seen a lot of shit. Anyway, I will start with movies. Just to keep this post from being incredibly long, I will do maybe a sentence worth describing the media itself.

LET'S BEGIN

Movies:

Alright so we got the vampire movies, there are a shit ton out there. I mean A LOT. First, I will start with the more common/well known films.

Bram Stokers Dracula

This one is SPICY, it is a really great watch--minus Keanu Reeves' really shitty British accent ( I love Keanu so I can forgive him ) It is the most book based Dracula film I know, that and Gary Oldman legit steals the show every single time I see the movie.

Interview With The Vampire

This movie? Fucking slaps. Based upon the book, this movie reignited my love for vampires again. --i fell in love with Lestat briefly--BUT WE WON'T TALK ABOUT THAT. It takes place in New Orleans in the 1700's through an interview that a vampire is providing to a young man about his life story. It is a magical experience if you love vampires, you will laugh, cry, and scream all at once.

ORIGINAL Dracula

This one is hella cheesy. If you are a Dracula fan, it is a MUST. It came out in the 1930's so expect some crusty ass practical effects. My favorite including the fake bat on a string they used for Dracula. It is a fantastic movie nonetheless, kickstarting the history of vampires in film forever. Bela Lugosi did a fantastic performance as the caped villain. Highly suggest.

What We Do In The Shadows

This is a comedy/mockumentary about the lives of a group of vampires living in a flat together, trying to adapt to the modern world. It is fucking hilarious and if you want a good laugh, I highly suggest it. Each one of the flatmates have their own era that they were created. The creativity in this film shows and it is just RGRGRHRGRG AMAZING. Also I love Viago.

Fright Night ORIGINAL/Remake

*GESTURES TO MY BLOG VIOLENTLY* What more is to be said about these movies? Big epic vampire man moves next door and causes havoc, the next door neighbor finds out and decides to hunt him down. Along with his girlfriend. Never a good idea. Anyway! If you haven't watched this movie. EITHER OF THEM, and you have stepped into my blog, go watch them 👍 both Jerrys are fantastic.

The Lost Boys

Go

GO FUCKING WATCH IT.

----

Okay so here are the lesser known films that we got here.

Only Lovers Left Alive

This movie was depressing as hell. I don't suggest it if you are prone to tears because you will be bawling. The cinematography is gorgeous and the acting is fantastic. I love these two and their dynamic--especially Tom Hiddleston because the man is a legend. It is about the life of a vampire couple struggling to live in the world surrounded by humans. Beautiful film.

The Hunger

LEGIT WHY DOES NOBODY TALK ABOUT THIS DAMN MOVIE? Okay so this film is good with it's flaws, fantastic movie nonetheless. Beautiful cinematography as well. David Bowie plays a vampire in this film which already makes it amazing. The movie does have a weird aesthetic but nonetheless enjoyable. This vampire movie is also about a couple but with a twist--I DON'T WANNA SPOIL IT SO YOU GOTTA FIND OUT.

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

This movie is uh, an experience. Picture a movie about Abraham Lincoln's life but shove vampire hunting in it. That is the entire movie. It is great with the action choreography, beautifully shot at times. If more strange/out there vampire movies are your forte. This is for you.

There are more I can touch on, however, I will stop it here before I continue ENDLESSLY.

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Series:

There isn't very many vampire shows out there that I have seen, simply because I don't care much for shows like Vampire Diaries. I will give you the ones I have personally seen as I have been doing with this list.

Dracula (Netflix)

I CANNOT PUT ANY MORE IMAGES DOWN SO YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT.

This show? Fucking rad. As you can see by this list, I am a big Dracula fan. This show was fantastic. Beautiful, beautiful cinematography. Absolutely amazing soundtrack with fucking awesome acting. This show consists of three episodes, put into smaller bite sized pieces of about ONE HOUR AND 20-30 MINUTES EACH KDKDKDKDK. But don't fret, because you will want more content when it is done. This series takes the Dracula book and throws it out the window. Check it out.

What We Do In The Shadows (Series)

Watch this, it is amazing. The comedy is music to my ears and each character is fucking awesome. Similar to the movie but unrelated. Fantastic, highly suggest.

Castlevania (Netflix)

A wonderfully animated show that is absolutely violent and gruesome. Includes characters from the beloved Castlevania video game. Story is about angry Dracula killing everyone for spoiler based reasons. It's on Netflix, definitely a must.

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AND THAT IS MY LIST! It is a basic one, otherwise I would have put on much more. I loved basically all of these so I hope you will too.

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[pepsicup]

Problems Of A Spaceman

Chris Beck x Stripper!Reader  6.4k words

Summary: Chris attempts to gain some confidence back after his fiancée leaves him, though, the journey is different than he thought it would be... (smut, mentions of cheating, self-deprecation, exotic dancing, space kink because duh, dope fucking music choice if I do say so myself)

Author note: yes I did write this four years ago, this is an updated version since I recently found it after deleting my other blog, enjoy.

2037

It shouldn’t even be a thing. Chris didn’t get nervous, this was something new for him. After thirteen years of education, five standard spacewalks and a back-to-back trip to the newly colonized neighbouring red planet, nothing should phase him anymore – but that was space. There were things significantly more nerve-wracking than his current situation; perhaps he was better at being an astronaut than fulfilling his social and romantic life.

While taking all the prerequisites required for NASA and in medical school, he didn’t have time for fraternizing with anyone, most people in the medical field experience that. It was a miracle that he could even keep the attention of his ex-fiancée during the mission to Mars since he didn’t exactly know how to flirt. No matter how intelligent he was, all of that did nothing to help him in his personal life and everything that came with it.

Furthermore, the sexual aspect was a problem for him, too.

He’s never had an opportunity to explore himself with another person, of course, he’s had plenty of sex but, it was nothing more than the standard modus operandi. Beth was hard to navigate, she was disengaged and blatantly selfish, eventually blaming him for her unfaithful tendencies and lack of interest when he was the only one making an effort. It ended as it began, a complete circumstantial shitshow and because of that, he is on a mission to gain self-confidence back.

Since she kicked him out, he’s been sleeping in the spare room of his good friends’ house for the last couple of months while his new apartment is being renovated. Mark Watney was a single man who knew what that position felt like, and who also knew the beginnings of a solution. The ability to pay women for their undivided attention did wonders for a man’s ego, especially at an exclusive gentlemen’s club rather than a regular strip joint. It is more of a candid transaction that was valued at both ends.

And it is very exclusive. It required a reservation to save a slot since it was so well-known and a general, but hefty, fee at the door as insurance.

He made it sound like the easiest thing in the world, but on the other hand, Chris was so fucking anxious to go that he could vividly feel his blood pumping in overdrive. He’s never, ever attended a place like that before. But as he looked up at the classy, luminescent sign of the building that lit up the dark parking lot, he started to wonder what exactly he’s getting himself into. Just as long as he isn’t awkward, maybe everything will be okay.

Don’t be weird, don’t fuck it up. Simple.

He repeated those words in his head as he was looked over by the heavy before being let in and did everything the lady at the front desk told him to. After that, it was time to be escorted through the big fancy door.

The initial shock passed through him quickly, the smell of perfume, cigars and liquor weren’t as bad as he thought it was going to be. But once he rounded the corner into the main lounge the nerves were back. The wild colours in the dusky lighting gave the atmosphere an alluring feel as he bared witness to scarcely clothed women dancing on stage, at tables with other men and walking around the floor.

He adjusted his ball cap to sit lower on his face and scanned the room for a free seat, suddenly feeling a little overwhelmed and needing to sit down before he either collapsed or backed out entirely. Chris Beck was not good at this.

Could he perform surgery after surgery for 16 hours straight? Yes.

Can he proudly say that he is an award-winning astronaut that helped shape the future of space science? Fuck yeah, he can.

Can he say that he can bed anyone he wants and walk around like he owns the place? No, no he cannot.

The spaceman sat in a vacant booth near the left side of the stage, tucked away in a dark corner to observe as he planned. Yeah, he was good at observing. Watney reassured him before he left, stating that he did specialize in human anatomy and he should do what he does best...observe, evaluate and execute, which helped a bit. A doctor’s point of view was his only saving grace right now, he’d stick to that comfortable method for as long as he can.

Observe.

He found himself zoning in on different interactions that played out as time ticked by. Many lovely women took their turn on stage, very healthy and some men had been taken behind curtains and even thrown out for inappropriate behaviour. He made of a note of that in the back of his mind if there ever came a time. No touching.

He didn’t know how much time had passed since he arrived. There were a few nice girls who came over to talk to him, but he declined any offers they threw his way respectfully and chose to remain where he was instead. Although, just when he thought about turning in for the night, the lights suddenly dimmed until it was almost pitch-black. So dark that he couldn’t even see his hand.

The emcee bordered more background music that rattled his chest through the speakers above the circle booth, it increased slowly and he assumed it was building up to another track. The crowd of regulars and new attendees alike cheered loudly at the change of pace, Chris perked up and clapped along with them even though he had no clue as to what.

      “Ladies, gentlemen and every-damn-one in between, we have a special treat for you tonight.” the man announced heartily.

      He continued as the music came to a peak, then dissipated as he spoke the moniker of the next dancer, “Your house favourite has decided to give you a dance that I think is out of this world...please welcome to the stage, Ares”

The patrons went wild as Chris, on the other hand, went rigid – almost choking on his drink.

As the projected images of deep space filled the room in a flash, a dancer was now on stage walking around in something simple, yet sexy. No one could get enough of her or the choreography, staying for her performances that always seemed to have a different aesthetical essence every time she made an appearance.

The modest man couldn’t stop looking at her, she was the main focus of the room – but for him, the significance was completely different from the others. What were the chances that one of his biggest passions in life could be used as an exotic dance theme, materialized right in front of his eyes?

But when the music started...that’s when things even more interesting.

The song wasn’t one he anticipated, he assumed it would be the same club music that made his eardrums shudder, but this slow beat only made his senses buzz, and not just from the vibrations. He enjoyed the older music his commander played after years of listening to it. So, when he detected the beginning of this underrated 1972 classic by Harry Nilsson, this stripper had his full attention.

Bang, bang, shoot em’ up, destiny Bang, bang, shoot em’ up to the moon Bang, bang, shoot em’ up one, two, three (One, two, three, four)

The woman circled the pole as the song started to wind up, making little gestures to the regulars and letting the music guide her. She hit every deep strum of the guitar by waving her hips from side to side delicately, still holding on to the shiny metal planted at her side.

As the artist started to sing the corresponding words, she spun around the pole. The lights caught the small crystals on her one-piece and somehow, scattered like the night sky on her bare skin. Her hips moved sinfully as her body followed the fluid movements like Saturn’s rings, circulating with the natural orbit of the planet. Or pole in this case.

I wanted to be a spaceman That’s what I wanted to be But now that I am a spaceman Nobody cares about me

Next, with every distinct beat, she put her back to the pole, slid down and arose in one fell swoop. She twirled once, flipping her hair behind her head and rolling her lower body ‘round and around and around and around as the words called out above the hollering. The attention was now drawn to her lower body.

Highlighting her assets as dancers called it.

Hey Mother Earth, won’t ‘cha bring me back down Safely to the sea But ‘round and around and around and around Is all she ever say to me

She melted down on all fours to crawl across the platform, doing the next progressions effortlessly. She laid on her back, arching her body like a tidal wave entranced by the moon, rolling onto her stomach, and using her knees to sweep her torso across the floor until she was up in a kneeling position again.

The way she created a giant slip from her ass to her shoulders gave the perfect view of her behind to the men and women on the left side of the stage, money cascading across her body. It was quick yet elegant.

I wanted to make a good run I wanted to go to the moon I knew that it had to be fun I told ‘em to send me real soon I wanted to be a spaceman That’s what I wanted to be But now that I am a spaceman Nobody cares about me

She repeated similar moves to the first chorus but on her knees this time, feeling up her own body, wiggling her assets playfully at whoever she wanted – connecting with the audience. Chris was captivated by the way she carried her body like that, the slightly distorted music gave a sexy edge to her routine that caused his cock to throb in his jeans. 

In his big doctor brain, he was trying to figure out how someone could be so graceful. Even if he felt ashamed of viewing her so strenuously, he justified it by observing her anatomy like the surgeon he was.

She didn’t wear high heels, opting to be barefoot, and the only extravagant makeup she wore was something that made her body sparkle. Her simple lingerie wasn’t something that stole the show, she just came as herself. The differences help him tell a lot about who she was, the little details sending signals to his genius mind.

Hey Mother Earth, won’t 'cha bring me back down Safely to the sea Around and around and around and around Is just a lot of lunacy (yeah, yeah)

The break in the lyrics gave a sense of anticipation, the echo prepared everyone for the next verse as the song swerved in and out of a muffled tone. Then, she was watching him.

Chris abruptly looked away as the mood changed, his breath hitching as he erratically glanced around before settling on her again. She appeared to be showing off for him now with a smile on her lips. He swallowed thickly as his mouth began to water and dry out at the same time, exchanging aggressive eye contact with the woman that had his undivided attention.

The music got lost in the background noise as they disappeared into their own world, his heart pulsed in his ear and his breath shallowed as everything around them was lost. It was like the earth had stopped spinning, the gravity giving out so the spaceman could feel weightless. There were faint pictures of the cosmos floating across his flushed skin, revealing his lip clamped between his impressively white teeth.

'Round and around and around and around and around (So bring me back down) 'Round and around and around and around and around Safe on the ground

He wasn’t trying to be sensual, Chris chewed his bottom lip when he was either content, uneasy or nervous. And nervous he was. Those eyes said innocence but the rest of him screamed sex fiend who could pound her into another universe if provoked, it definitely piqued her interest.

She never had the pleasure of seeing a person in tune with her like that before, it was refreshing. He looked like he was genuinely enjoying the way her body made him react but on a more personal level, something difficult to accomplish from 15 feet away.

Hey Mother Earth, better bring me back down Safely to the sea But around and around and around and around Is all she ever say to me, yeah

She had to be the one to break the intense eyefuck that was taking place, on both ends, in the middle of her set. Chris sensed the music drift back in, the planet rotating once more and coming back to himself after his mind floated away into endless space amongst many stars filling the void. As the song came to a close, she followed the rest of her routine with similar moves, collecting herself after a mere moment.

Everything was simply...simple.

But there was still so much of the unknown that came with the woman she was, remaining understated in this line of work and feeding a lot of emotion into her life passion. He could feel it.

That is the exact reason why she was a house favourite.

You know, I wanted to be a spaceman That’s what I wanted to be But now that I am a spaceman Nobody cares about me Say hey, you Mother Earth, you better bring me back down I’ve taken just as much as I can But around and around and around and around Is the problem of a spaceman

Evaluate.

That spaceman had a problem alright.

She just took him on a fucking cosmic ride that will be burned into his mind for the foreseeable future. His pants were now painfully tight, pressing his cock close to his body so that every time he moved his tip would be stimulated by his silky briefs. He was being forced to evaluate his current predicament.

He thought about the next step as the projections faded from the room and her along with them, completely vanished by the time the lights dimmed down and back up again.

Chris originally wanted to stay for a while longer to watch some more, not pushing himself to do more than he was prepared for; progress takes time and it depends on the person. He evaluated the options in front of him, either pursue the course that led him to the woman who just blew his mind or, stick with what he had been doing for the past five months – fucking his hand while he rested alone in his bed.

Eventually, after he gave into the disconcerted feeling picking him apart, he went with the familiar option and kept his head down in disappointment at his lack of confidence, sliding out of the booth. He just wanted to go home at this point, maybe he would try again another day. He nearly reached the exit when a security guard abruptly stopped him from leaving, he thought he did something wrong at first but as it turns out, that was far from what was the case.

      “No, you didn’t do anything—you’re being requested by a dancer” the large man chuckled.

Chris looked up at the man that towered over him, questioning the authenticity of the claim. He clapped him on the shoulder.

      “If I were you, man...I would take the dance. She rarely takes requests but offering...one in a million”

The security guard walked him into the back where the exclusive rooms were and into one with a large circular seat, gentle lighting and parlour cabinet full of assorted items. It wasn’t a suffocating space, but he felt like he was running out of oxygen

      “Enjoy the show, man” with that final word, he left Chris alone in the room.

Once the door clicked, he rushed to rub his sweaty palms on his dark jeans and took a shaky breath as he sat down, pulling on the neckband of his sweater. In the meantime, he worked on not being so high strung, the door being behind him didn’t help as he waited for her to come. While the anticipation slowly drove him nuts, he ran the three steps Watney reminded him of in his cloudy mind.

Observe, evaluate and...execute.

Execute.

He was startled at the hands sneaking around his shoulders and lightly down his chest, making him jump in a bit in the big velvet chair. He was too deep in his thoughts to hear the door open behind him or her walking in on his stiff back facing her. Chris heard her soft chuckle behind him and felt the warm air caress his sensitive neck.

      “Easy loverboy” Ares cooed in a low voice.

If it wasn’t before, his heart was racing at lightspeed now. She had such a strong effect on him.

      “...you’re very tense. Did you know that?” she whispered behind his ear.

He shivered at the feeling and slowly nodded, not trusting his stupid mouth to not say something awkward.

      She chuckled again, “You have the prettiest blue eyes...even from a distance”

The woman walked around his seated boy, keeping her hands on him but moving them with her until she was faced with the mystery man from the darkest corner in the lounge. He wasn’t looking at her, but around her, and trying to find somewhere to rest his relentless gaze. It was all in vain though, she trailed her finger along his jaw and under his chin, forcing his eyes to hers.

      “Hmm, there they are—better up close” she bit her lip softly.

He looks so timid, with his big beady eyes and those perfectly pouted lips working in the evilest ways. Chris blushed at the compliment, feeling better about himself already.

Watney might actually be right about this whole excursion after all.

      “I—uh, thank you” he murmured.

Chris cursed himself for already stuttering like a dumbass.

In his defence, she was touching him ever-so-gently and how can he not trip up his words with her looking like a holy goddess. Ironic, given the circumstance. And now, he couldn’t look away.

Especially since her hands travelled upwards to pull his NASA ball cap off, then leaning forward while maintaining that close proximity as she unzipped his sweater, helping him pull it off.

      “We don’t need those” Ares whispered, tossing the garments on the floor.

But there was always some teasing before the actual contact.

As she put distance between their bodies, he was resting almost slack in the chair – legs parted, arms limp at his side and in his lap as soft music began to play. The apple of throat bobbed in his tight throat as she began moving slowly in front of him, full of grace and precision. She was like a supernova, its effortlessly soft edges melting into the black of space as her skin did with her bodysuit. The fact that he was the only one seeing it made the experience that much sweeter, all those feelings coming back from earlier.

He was also able to recognize that she was wearing subtle glitter and rhinestones that temporarily fused to her skin, causing the shine and sparkle of her body on stage.

Once she gave him time to get comfortable, she spread his legs apart and hovered her back over his chest, grinding her ass into his lap. The shampoo and light perfume made his sex twitch as he inhaled it in, trying his best not to give in and touch. He kept his hands on the edges of the chair, his fingers digging into it painfully – he remembered what happened to the other guys, how they got thrown out. Chris just wants to watch, that’s good enough for him.

No touching.

Ares leaned forward slightly, arching her back and hitting his private areas in all the right places, gradually making him break out into a small sweat. The woman rubbed her ass on his lap expertly and before he knew it, she pressed herself against him to lay her head on his shoulder.

       “I hope you know, the way you looked at me...you really know how to get a girl hot and bothered.”

Of course, he blushed again. His face was burning like the sun at this point.

       “I...I was just enjoying it—you are very talented” Chris laughed nervously.

He turned his face slightly, absentmindedly following the heat of her skin until he was fanning her neck, so close...but never touching. He was so, sooo close, but felt so far.

She stood up without warning and slowly turned around, pushing him back into the back of the chair more and watching as he widened eyes dilated further at her forwardness. He’d clearly never had a lap dance so he probably didn’t know about what happened during one. She set her legs on either side of his thighs, effectively straddling him to get on with the real deal. She smoothed her arms around his neck and left them to hang lazily off the back of the chair, never breaking eye contact the entire time.

       “That’s very sweet, I can feel how excited you are...”

As she began to move, their heads fell back simultaneously from the direct friction. Ares righted her head after a second and pressed into his personal space, their noses touching every time she moved up his lower body and back down again. She circled her hips a couple of times and breathed out a sigh, it was nice not giving lap dances to the clingy regulars and giving a man like this her talented movements and motions instead. It was different this time around, the atmosphere was weirdly intimate – he just gave off that energy.

       “Very excited...” Ares added.

Chris shuttered as she rested her entire body weight on his clothed erection at the sentence, now realizing how difficult it was not to touch. Though she picked up on his hesitation and demeanour instantaneously. She stroked all over his arms, chest and stomach for the first time, feeling how cut the guy really was, there were endless muscles. Very practical.

       He gave her a shy smile, “It’s been a long time since I’ve felt this way—to, uh...to have my body behave this way, I mean”

       “Ah, I’m turning you on?...” she asked, leaning in.

Chris didn’t know what to say to that, he’s never been good in these situations and more often than not resorted to the only thing he knows everything about. He’s starting to lose his cool and what happens when he loses his cool?

Well, he is not very smooth.

       “I, um...it’s the body sending signals the corresponding part of the brain...neurons fire commands and simulate the, uh...ohh,” a moan cut off his rambling.

He could feel himself getting closer to his release, something he didn’t want but also desperately wanted at the same time. He was already on edge when he was in the booth, his brain constantly stimulating his sex to the point where his boner couldn’t go away. The way it was being dragged across his pants made him groan even more.

       She giggled, “Has anyone told you that you’re a dork when you’re nervous?”

Chris shook his head, closing his eyes to try and fight off his orgasm until the lap dance was over. He had to swallow most of the breaths that became more and more erratic with every sway of her hips.

The way his skin flushed a dark pink and his breathing picked up confirmed she was doing a good job, but the only thing that threw Ares off was the fact that he was shaking violently, a straining vein on his neck making an impression in his flesh. She was unknowingly pumping his shaft along with his jeans, practically coaxing his seed to just burst out of him.

Chris felt his balls go stiff, cock pulse and tighten right before he lost control. The thing that pushed him to his limit was his balls compressing between his legs when she quickly swivelled her hips. He gripped the arms of the chair and thrust his hips upward, letting out a long mewl and finally giving up on holding back as pleasure took over his ability to think properly. Ares stopped moving while he continued riding out his orgasm that felt too goddamn good, cum seeping out of his boxers and down his thigh.

Once he found a way to maneuver himself back to Earth, he went completely limp in the chair as if he just ran a triathlon when the reality of what just happened hit him. That just happened, he hasn’t cum in his pants since his first year of university, and didn’t have a clue of what to do about it.

Why didn’t he just stay home? He could have avoided this if he just isolated himself in his room like he usually did.

       “Huh...that’s never happened to me before,” she said in a tone he couldn’t quite decipher.

       He glanced away after opening his eyes, still in a daze, “I...um”

For a moment he thought he made her uncomfortable and was getting ready to apologize, possibly leave if she wanted him to. But instead, he tilted his head as the embarrassment on his face was replaced by confusion at her smirk and gentle eyes. She dragged her ass across him once, making him hiss at the sensitivity of his half-hard cock still dripping with arousal.

Usually, she didn’t allow excessive touching and avoided any kind of sexual encounters at work, it wasn’t her thing – but there was something about this one that told her he should be pleased. To be honest, he wasn’t some run-of-the-mill scumbag or pompous prick like the usual attendees are, she’s starting to see he’s a plain, genuine guy. That’s why it took him by surprise when she leaned down and pressed a long kiss on the crease of his throat, sucking on it periodically.

       “...I thought there was no, mhmm, touching” Chris stammered.

Ares held on to the baby hairs at the back of his neck, then ran his soft hair through her fingers as she kissed her way across his face. Their lips brush together as she spoke.

       “Shhhh, let me take care of you...and this” she moved on him again, a mischievous gleam in her eye.

Chris whimpered out a noise of surprise when she finally connected both their lips together, she sucked his bottom one between hers and nipped at it tenderly. She grabbed his hands, placing them on her to encourage him to feel her, to touch her body. He was hesitant with his movements, still diffident even when she slithered her tongue into his soft mouth, twirling and caressing his.

When they disconnected he panted heavily in the shared space, she hummed at his expression, desire. After she climbed off his lap and kneeled in front of him as her hands began to unbuckle his belt and tug at his zipper.

       “Okay, this is happening? Right now?...oh” Chris breathed out.

Everything was happening so fast, he didn’t have time to think about the repercussions of his irresponsible, but tempting actions. His voice of reason was screaming its concern and he couldn’t help but listen to it as he sat there, immobilized while she worked his pants, then cum-soaked briefs down his legs.

       “You really don’t have t—” he groaned throatily as she pumped his shaft.

It was always the dorky guys who have the nicest and fullest cocks she had ever seen without fail – he was no different in that department, a decent length, thickness and fit for her. Ares stroked him until he was fully solid again, admiring the way he turned his hips up at the feeling of her hand around him – at least, if they stopped now, he’d have a good visual to fuel his lewd imagination late at night.

       She quirked a wholesome smile, “We need to clean you up before things get too heated”

Chris would have mentally retracted the concept of using her as ammunition for his masturbation thoughts, but he was too busy with his eyes rolling back at the most damning sight in the universe. She began to lick the cum from where it was on his body, on his cock, all over his thigh and what remained on her fingers; swallowing everything before working him over with her mouth.

       “Jesus Christ...” he growled, reeling in an abrupt lust. He held the back of her head as she sucked him off, “it’ll be over very soon if you don’t get up here”

Even taken aback by his tone, she grinned and gestured at him stand up along with her, encouraging him to pull the bodysuit straps down. Chris kissed along her collarbone faintly, tugging the lingerie down to expose her breasts and gleaming heat to his eyes. He kissed her neck as best he could, not knowing if he was making her feel good in the least but still giving it his best shot.

       “God, you are beautiful...”

Luckily, she moaned at his rumbling words on her skin, relaxing him a little bit.

This was crunch time, they need to do it now. Ares rushed to pull his white t-shirt off, appreciating his abs, pecs and biceps as she pushed him back down on the chair forcefully – he looked like a complete stud but had the sweetest personality ever. She giggled as he squirmed out of his pants and kicked off his shoes so he could be fully naked like her, climbing on him again as he did so.

Chris didn’t want anything binding him while this happened.

       “Do you have a condom?” she mumbled against his lips, kissing him again.

He made an affirming noise, gesturing for her to pick up his pants where his wallet held one in a hidden pocket. He quickly fumbled the leather out and tossed it with his pants to the ground, barely getting the condom out before she snatched it and rolled it down the length of him. She propped herself on her knees, coating him in her growing wetness as she prepared to take him. 

But, he hesitated and held her just above him.

       “Are you...are you sure you want to do this—with me?” Chris asked, his eyes held a sadness that she never wanted to see from him again.

Of course, she wanted to...now more than ever.

To reassure him, she cupped his cheek with her free hand and pressed their foreheads together. The woman revelled in the way his mouth dropped open, eyes becoming hooded and a gasp hitching in the back of his throat as she sunk onto him. Looking deep into his eyes and watching the sadness dissipate into satisfaction. He grasped her waist with one arm as she began to ride him at a steady pace, his cock stretching her.

Chris groaned loudly, choking on his moans every so often when she caressed the right spot. The speed increased as he began to enthusiastically meet her thrusts, causing them to both murmur muffled whines and whimpers into each other’s mouths. One hardy smack of his thighs to her ass pierced their ears when he gave a particularly harsh snap of his body, pulling her down as he kept up with his hard thrusts into her.

       “Fuck, do that again...” she shivered as he fucked her so carefully, making her needier every second.

He had his brows furrowed in concentration, focusing on pleasuring her and tried to forget the doubts he had to live in that moment. This was more than spontaneous sex for him, he was making love to someone – feeling good for once. He has never fucked someone before but, if anything, he was giving her the most carnal, admiration-fueled sex he could.

She bounced faster as he, in turn, bucked into her harder. She was clenching, he was throbbing...it was too much.

       “God, that’s it, just like that,” he grunted, continuing to manually move her slowing hips.

       “Shit, you’re gonna make me cum...” she groaned, “...please tell me you’re close”

Chris nodded fervently, keeping his eyes locked on her for as long as he could. In the final stretch, as her clenching became more prevalent, he kept one arm around her as he trailed his hand down to her clit. Just when started to rub, his fingers caught the nerves underneath and made her cry out.

       “Does that feel good for you? Is it okay?” he asked politely.

Ares sobbed her ‘yes’ in a pitchy tone.

He hugged her tightly against him as everything started to unwind, leaving his pelvis to stimulate her clit. The woman clenched hard around him as she lost her vision, the way her cunt gripped made him speed up his thrusts to continue moving. Her low whine near his ear did him in, his lower body ghosted on a final thrust as he stopped completely – his heaving was muffled by the clenching of his teeth, letting himself tremble in her arms as he filled the condom with his cum.

       After a while of sitting there, Chris broke the silence, “I...I think my time is up”

She laughed at his witty remark, not realizing how much that boosted his mood and tugged at his heart, or how she just single-handedly repaired his self-worth. There was no way to process it, all he knew was he felt amazing, he felt...content.

Ares stood on weak legs, climbing off him and allowing him to dispose of the condom. Chris had a dopey smile on his face as he pulled his pants back on and did the fastenings quickly, she was already back in her bodysuit by that time. He appeared to be lost in deep thought as she handed him his shirt, smirking at him – his skin flushed a soft rose when he finally noticed.

She scoffed.

       “Do I really make you nervous—after that?” she retrieved his sweater and cap off the floor where they were forgotten.

Chris laughed quietly before shifting back to his serious face, smiling somewhat. She wondered why he was there in the first place when he could have women lining up; well, if he wasn’t so humble that is.

       He cleared his throat, “uh...thank you for that by the way. You didn’t have to do what you did...I just” then began rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. 

         “I’m not good at this stuff, one-time things and strippers—or, I mean exotic dancers, I didn’t mean for that to sound like th—”

To save him from himself, she curled her fingers around his shirt collar and pulled him in, kissing him thoughtfully. Chris cupped the back of her head right away and held her waist as she encompassed the modest stranger with her warmth. He chased her mouth after she broke away from his pursed lips, brows furrowing at his want to keep kissing her.

       “You talk a lot, it’s sweet” she giggled at his actions.

Following that encounter, he felt like a new man. She let him make love to her, or fuck her, whichever it was. He couldn’t get over that woman, she felt authentic in his arms, unlike Beth who felt out of place and made him realize his ex was never meant for him at all.

Chris was walking away, leftover clothes in hand and messy sex hair weathered by her hands, but before he could slip behind the curtain leading back to the lounge, she called out to him. When he turned to face her, she was in a robe and leaning laxly against the wall, just as dishevelled as he was.

       “For the record, I’m not good at this—” she gestured between them, “—either”

He drove home with a smile on his face and satisfaction coursing through him.

Although, he couldn’t shake the nagging feeling of having a mere fling. Not even knowing anything about her while doing something so intimate, something personal to him. He wished he would have asked her real name or her number, so he could thank her properly or even, possibly ask her out.

He had a feeling about her, the attraction was undeniable now.

Perhaps it was a god working some sort of miracle or the planet’s alignment giving him mystical energy, maybe something as simple as luck. But, as he started to get ready for bed that night, a piece of paper fell out of his jeans as he stripped to have a shower.

Curiously, he picked it up and looked it over.

xxx-xxx-xxxx Just because I knew you wouldn’t ask for it. Call me sometime. – Y/N

Maybe he would take her out.

After all, he felt as if they had this connection, even if it was unconventional from any other relationship he had before. One thing he knew for sure was he liked the sound of her name on his tongue, repeating it in front of the mirror and practicing what to say to her...thinking about her until he fell fast asleep.

The spaceman used to have problems, but now?

He has none.

© August 26th, 2018  |  April 20th, 2021 by pepsicup

[maastrash]

Person A and Person B are friends and neither of them have a date for Valentine’s Day, so they decide to order takeout of some kind and watch a movie together. At some point, hidden feelings are revealed. umm elorcan, obvi, because i am nothing if not predictable 🤪

isa... babe... i swear i actually did start writing this around Valentine's day... but... i am CLEARLY a mess.... please accept my VERY late elorcan present 😳

Valentine's Day Confessions

a/n: surprise i am alive ;)

Elide cursed as she grabbed the steaming hot popcorn bag from the microwave. The decadent buttery scent filled her cozy apartment as she poured it into her favorite mixing bowl. She was about to pour in the m&m’s when she remembered who exactly was joining her tonight - Lorcan. And her friend was not a fan of chocolate. If you asked her, the man simply had no taste.

It was Valentine’s Day and the pair had decided to have a singles awareness celebration. Since their entire friend group was filled with couples they were each other’s only source of company on this dreaded day. Truthfully, Elide despised Valentine’s day. Seeing countless couple posts on Instagram and stupid lovey-dovey shit everywhere only made her more bitter. She hadn’t had a boyfriend in a long time - too long. If she was being honest, she had always thought Lorcan would make a move on her one day. Though at this point, it had been years of banter and flirting with absolutely nothing else, so she had pretty much lost all hope. She would just have to accept that she would forever be in the friend zone, but of course, that was easier said than done.

She settled into the couch with her favorite stuffed animal when the doorbell rang. Lorcan, she assumed.

“It’s open,” she called.

“Elide, I could have been a killer,” Lorcan chastised as he took off his leather jacket and shoes at the front.”

“What killer rings the doorbell?” she shot back.

“Ok fair point,” he said, quickly settling down next to her.

“What do you wanna watch?” she asked, turning to Netflix.

Lorcan shrugged, “Your house your rules El.”

“Lorcan,” she grumbled. “You know I’m too indecisive for this.”

He had the audacity to laugh at her misery, “I know, but it’s funny watching you struggle.”

“I already know no romance movies. I’ve already seen enough lovey Snapchat stories to last a lifetime.”

“Agreed. Did you see all the shit Rowan and Aelin have been posting?” Lorcan asked with a laugh.

Elide laughed too. “Can’t be worse than Lysandra and Aedion.”

Maybe they were just cynical because they were both single, but at the moment Elide didn’t care. It was fun to joke around with Lorcan.

“Let’s watch an action movie then,” Lorcan suggested.

“John wick?” Elide asked, already clicking play.

Lorcan smiled, “Sounds like a plan.”

The movie had barely begun before Lorcan was shifting his massive frame to lay down, placing his head on Elide’s lap.

"Lorcan," she groaned. “You’re heavy as fuck.”

He mockingly gasped, “I’ll have you know I’m on a diet Elide Lochan.”

“It’s your absurd height, stupid,” she whacked him, but he was laughing the whole time.

“You’re warm,” Lorcan whined, sounding much like the five-year-olds that Elide taught every day.

“I have blankets right over there,” she said, gesturing to the basket overflowing with various throws.

Lorcan only stretched his legs out and adjusted himself on her lap. “If you don’t get up I’m gonna sit over there,” she said motioning to the new armchair she recently bought.

“When did you get that?” he asked, finally speaking.

“A few days ago because you literally take up the whole couch when we hang out.” She actually got it for decoration, but bantering with Lorcan was entertaining.

“You’re dramatic Lochan.”

“I’m dramatic?” Elide asked, as she stood. “I’ll show you dramatic.”

She walked to the armchair and plopped down crossing her arms and legs.

She was about to add another dramatic remark, but before she could she felt the chair give way. Suddenly, she was on the floor.

“Ouch,” she mumbled, once she registered the pain she felt on her ass.

“Elide, are you okay?” Lorcan asked, making his way over.

“Yeah I’m fine,” she muttered. “But I am never buying Ikea furniture again.”

In all honesty, it was probably her faulty building skills, but she was not going to admit that at the moment.

She tried to stand but pain shot up her ankle. She had landed on it weirdly, due to her dramatic crossed leg position.

“Wait for me Lochan,” Lorcan said as he carefully picked her up bridal style from the ruins of what once was her armchair.

“I could’ve walked,” she said softly against his chest.

That made Lorcan chuckle. “You were barely standing, El. You would have hobbled at best,” he said gently, placing her on the couch. "Let me get some ice. Your ankle already looks pretty swollen."

“I think it's just aggravated. Old wound,” she tried to say it with a smile, but it probably looked more like a grimace.

Lorcan’s eyes softened in understanding. “Ice won’t hurt though.”

Elide nodded and Lorcan took to the kitchen freezer in search of ice. He returned moments later with a bag of frozen peas wrapped haphazardly in a paper towel. He helped situate her ankle on a pillow so it was elevated and gingerly placed the bag on top.

“Shit that’s cold,” Elide couldn’t help but hiss.

Lorcan laughed softly and Elide smiled. Lorcan’s laugh was one of her favorite sounds. It was rare to see him smile and laugh openly when they were with their other friends, but when it was just them she saw it more often. She liked to think that it was because he was comfortable enough with her to show the real Lorcan.

“That’s the point, Lochan.”

“Get us some drinks, Salveterre,” she chuckled. “There is no better medicine than alcohol.”

“Whatever you say, boss,”

“I have a bottle of wine on the top shelf,” Elide called when she heard Lorcan rustling around.

“Got it,” Lorcan said, returning with a cup of wine. A cup.

“I was too lazy to find the glass,” he said in response to the look she gave him.

Elide stuck her tongue out at him before accepting the cup. “Let’s drink every time Keanu Reeves shoots someone,” she suggested.

“Elide, I think you would throw up if we did that.”

Elide rolled her eyes, “I’m not as much of a lightweight as I was in college, Lorcan.”

He raised a brow at her statement. “We’ll see about that."

As he expected, it had barely been 20 minutes, and Elide was already a giggling mess.

It only took 10 more for her head to fall on Lorcan’s shoulder.

And after another 10 minutes, Elide was onto the honesty.

She had hung out with Lorcan one on one many times, but nothing as intimate as a movie night on Valentine’s day where they were practically cuddling.

“Ok Salveterre truth or dare,” Elide slurred, turning to look at him.

“Elide the movie isn’t over yet,” he said pointing to the screen.

Elide gave him a look and paused the movie, “I’m too drunk to pay attention, plus we’ve watched this movie like five times,”

“Fine,” He laughed, giving in, “I say dare.”

“I dare you,” she said, poking him in the chest, “To kiss me.”

Lorcan almost spit out his wine. “Elide, you are way too drunk to be saying things like that.”

“I’m serious,” she said, setting her wine cup down for emphasis.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you since the day I met you, but you clearly only want to be friends.”

“Elide -”

“I know I’m not your type,” she said, her eyes dropping to the floor. “It’s fine, we can forget about this and blame it on the alcohol. It doesn’t have to be weird between us.”

She felt his hands on her chin, tilting it so they made eye contact.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you since the day I met you too. Elide Lochan, you are smart, kind, and pretty much out of my league in every single way. ”

She felt her cheeks flush at his admission. “Please just kiss me already, Salvettere.”

Without another word, his lips were on hers. Soft and sweet, a perfect first kiss, but she wanted more. She kissed him harder and opened her mouth. He took the hint, his tongue sweeping into her mouth. He pulled her closer, her heart was beating wildly against his.

Elide shifted so she was straddling his lap. She grinded against him and let herself get lost in the way he felt. The way he made her feel.

Lorcan shifted slightly as if he was going to lay her down. It would have been perfect, but Elide’s ankle turned too quick and she grimaced, breaking the kiss for a moment, but that’s all it took for Lorcan to pull back.

“Shit. Sorry, Lochan. I forgot about your ankle.”

“No I’m fine,” she panted breathlessly, trying to pull him back in.

“Maybe we should stop for tonight,” he said, brushing the hair from her eyes.

Elide grumbled, “stupid cock blocking ankle.”

Lorcan laughed again. “I can get you set up in your bed before I head out.”

Elide couldn’t help the pout, “Stay please?” she asked, wrapping her arms around his chest.

He smiled softly. “Anything for you, El.”

They readjusted on the couch so they were facing each other, this time cautious of Elide’s ankle. Lorcan pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and Elide tucked herself closer to his side. It wasn’t long before both of them became drowsy thanks to the alcohol and their heartfelt confessions.

And as Elide began drifting off to sleep in Lorcan’s arms, she knew this is how she wanted to spend every night for the rest of her life.

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[honey-makki]

brainrot kinktober- 10/6

blue encens

Car Sex: Hinata Shoyo x Fem!Reader

Warnings: semi public sex, oral (m. receiving), penetrative sex, dirty talk

word count: 1.7k

masterlist

Hinata hasn’t been back in Japan for long and it’s obvious. His skin much darker from days playing volleyball in the sun. The white tee he’s wearing sits much tighter on his arms than it used to, leaving little to the imagination as it stretches across his chest. His distressed black jeans are the perfect combination to the almost too tight shirt, giving you a taste of skin showing at the thigh and knee that left you wanting more.

He glanced over at you to see if you had put the finishing touches on your makeup before calling an uber. You’re checking angles in the fluorescent light. A smile graces his face as he takes your figure in, just happy to finally be back home with you, be in the same room with you. The uber is ordered as he runs a hand through his hair thinking about how grateful he was to have the opportunity to play for MSBY and to be with you again. The years away were painful.

Trotting over to him when you are satisfied with your appearance and you plop a sweet kiss on his lips, nothing but excitement at the prospect of going out with the team as a welcome party. You knew that Hinata wouldn’t be drinking or want to stay too long since he had a one on one meeting with the athletic trainers and nutritionists in the morning before the afternoon practice. That won’t stop the rest of the boys as they have time to sleep off a potential hangover, and it certainly won’t stop you from celebrating your boyfriend’s return.

The long ride to the club passes quickly as he blabbers about how the city has changed but somehow stayed the same, just like how he still has his childish sense of wonder about him. By the time you arrive, the rest of the team is in the area they reserved, knocking back drinks and joking around. Bokuto is the first to spot Hinata and bounds over picking him up in a big hug. The scene is cute, long time friends reuniting and Hinata introducing you with adoration dripping from very word.

The team welcomes you into their group with ease, pestering you for embarrassing stories about Hinata, taking group shots regularly. Atsumu wants to go dance and a few others agree, you look to Hinata to see what his choice is, ready to follow his lead as the night is about him. So there you are, in the middle of the dance floor, no one you recognize insight with Hinata behind you gripping your hips.

The music is flowing through your body as you sway grinding into the man behind you whos matching your every movement with just as much enthusiasm. His time in Brazil for sure has made him a better dancer. That, or you are drunk and very much in love with your boyfriend. His hands start roaming the longer you stay on the floor. Sliding up and down your thighs, one sneaking up to cup your boob.

Between the heat from everyone crowded around you, the tequila flowing through your veins, and how Hinata was touching you, it’s fair to say you were getting hot. It’s been years since he had his hands on you and both of you were feeling the lust building up. If you were sober you would have moved his hands to a more respectable place, but in your tipsy state, you just ground back harder and moved a hand back to grip his hair. His scent, smoky incense and traces of cardamom and cinnamon flood your nose, overpowering the stench of sweat and spilled drinks of the club.

He places a few kisses along the back of your neck and it isn’t until he starts sucking a mark near your ear do you move to stop him. “Hinata, I need you to calm down, your hands are moving a little too freely and its a lot.” You hope the tone of your voice explains what you mean, because the thought of explaining just how horny you were in the middle of a club mortified you.

“I couldn’t keep my hands off you even if I wanted to, sunshine. I think it might be time for us to leave.” He grinds into you a little harder and you can feel his erection evident against your ass. Your movements cease as you realize your effect on him and he grabs your hand leading you towards the door as he orders an uber with his other hand. Neither of you giving a second thought about saying goodbye to his teammates.

You climb into the spacious black car, and see that the car even has a partition installed, did Hinata call an Uber Lux just to take you home for sex? You shoot him a questioning glance, but your features melt into a smile as you see him just staring at you with love. As soon as you buckle in he pulls you in for a deep kiss, hands intertwined with each other’s hair.

It doesn’t take long for him to move down your body reaching in your dress to grope your chest his other hand finding its way to your ass just under the hem. He knows what he’s doing to you, so in retaliation, your start palming his cock straining against his jeans. You pull back and see how flushed he looks, eyes wide and hungry for you.

He pulls you in for what you expect to be another make out, but its just one kiss and a pained plea against your lips “Suck?” You glance down and see how hard he is and paired with the lust you’ve been building for years, you comply, desperately unbuttoning his jeans to get access to his cock.  

Quickly taking the head in your mouth, precum mixing with the aftertaste of tequila and lime. You bob your head down at what should be a comfortable speed, but the combination of alcohol and being in a moving car, it makes you dizzy. You slow to a pace that is comfortable for you but probably painfully teasing for Hinata who is desperately chasing his high.

He carefully gathers some of your hair in one hand to grip, a soft ‘can I?’ tumbles out of his lips and you hum around his shaft knowing what he has in mind. He starts to thrust up into your mouth in a pace comparable to your original one, unrelenting in speed. Your jaw hurts from being stretched out, but the tequila dulls the pain, and honestly, its worth it./The soft grunts tumbling out of his mouth morph into groaned curses that leave you squeezing your thighs together. Looking for some friction against your needy cunt through your drenched underwear.

His eyes are locked on you and your body. so compliant for him. the body he’s imagined teasing and tasting for years and with the recognition that he finally can do that, he cums unexpectedly down your throat.

He unbuckles you and pulls you into his lap, sitting between his legs. He peppers kiss down the back of your neck, thanking you for making him feel so good and praising you for being such a good girl. His hands spread your thighs apart and one dips beneath your dress. Eyes fluttering shut at the contact on your clothed cunt.

“Can’t wait to be home with y- you, Sho.” Your voice is barely more than a whispered plead to the driver to go faster.

“Who says we need to wait?”

You turn back to face him, suddenly much more sober than you were two minutes prior. “Shoyo! We can’t! The driver will see us!”

He turns the rest of your body so you are straddling him. He whispers into your ear, “This car has a partition, darling.” His tone is daring and enticing, if it didn’t sell you on being fucked in the back seat of an uber, Hinata rolling his hips into yours did. You fumble to help him pull his jeans down and move your underwear to the side.

The stretch hurts but it’s what you’ve been wanting, the familiarity rushing back to you, fiting in your cunt like it was made just for you, filling you to the brim and rubbing against your sweet spot on every deep thrust. If it weren’t for the two fingers Hinata shoved in your mouth before you sunk down on his cock the whole city would have heard your moan.

“You’ll need to cum fast if you don’t want our driver to see you. Looks like traffic is lightening up and we are getting close to home.” It’s a challenge and your walls clench around him at the mere thought of being caught in such a position. He helps lift you up and down on him every thrust deep and hitting deep inside of you just like you want. The coil that’s been building in your stomach since dancing with him on the floor is almost unbearably tight.

His mouth his on your chest just leaving kisses and love marks along anything exposed, committing your body back to memory. When he sees familiar streets, he moves one hand from your thigh to rub your clit, tight and precise circles with his callused fingers drive you close and closer to the edge.

“Hmm, not gonna cum? Did you just want to get caught being fucked in a car like a good little whore? If that’s what you want, who am I to stop you?” His words are all for talk, but they send you over the edge into a violent orgasm, with an embarrassingly loud moan that the uber driver most definitely heard. You can’t focus on that though, not when it feels like lightning is crackling through your body leaving you breathless.

He helps get you put together enough to walk inside as the uber pulls up to your place. You mumble an embarrassed thanks to Hinata for helping you cum, while you walk to the door

“I would never let some random man see my sunshine.” He kisses your head before pushing you inside the door and towards the bedroom.

Tag list:  @definitelythotful @riniwrits @shrimpypenis @nonexistent-social-life @crushingonsuga @revolutionary-chocolate-cake @right-shoe-jpg @sugawara-sweetheart @nxynxy @aoba-baby​ @arianna20​ @scorpiosanssexy @ceo-of-daichi @dinosaurtsukki @turquoiselace @nonamemaximum @omibaby @chokemelevi @bokuakadaily @haikyuuangst @cutie-aesthetic-palace @whet-ones-write @superdepressedhoe @iwachanswh0re @crushzone @kiseox @mysticalroadnightempath @toobsessedsstuff @trouvelle @kodzu-ken @elianetsantana @sonyaroses-blog @tsukkisbitch If you are bold and crossed out please check your privacy settings :)

A/N: I spent a long time figuring out what cologne I wanted to use because timeskip!hinata is very important to me and this is the one I decided on and is the name sake of the fic. also thank you to everyone who has been thirsting for timeskip!hinata recently. you make me feel so so so valid bc its really just been me and daisy.