#and one reddit post but i found it on tumblr too so it counts right?

[dahliadagger]

BSD as random tumblr posts part 2

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

I saw your posts about Redditors' very unfair interpretations of Loki. And the fact that they went straight to calling you a narcissist because you questioned who is a reliable narrator makes my blood boil. They're shutting you up by perpetuating stigma towards NPD and other Cluster B disorders. And also I hate the acceptance of police tactics that often lead to entrapment and false confessions being framed as therapy.

in response to this post describing the situation. the comment thread itself can be found here, if anyone's curious, although that just shows the specific context around my comment; the broader context was this post, and then this original comment, which unfortunately got a shit-ton of upvotes despite also being on the same general dumb argument, although before the commenter got aggressive about it. so then somebody else started arguing, and the original commenter argued back at truly ridiculous length, and then I butted in to say "er well could you maybe clarify a couple critical parts of your premise here because I'm nnnnnot sure the text supports them actually" which yes is a little obnoxious in principle but not at all unusual for this type of discussion? because...this is...how Reddit discussions go? or Twitter or Tumblr discussions for that matter, like nobody has to respond to your entire long-ass exhausting thing about how Loki Is A Nasty Narcissist With A Huge Body Count when all they really want to do is point out that you, uh, seem to have a tiny bit of a structural problem underlying your whole argument, just...right there? that structural problem? and that other one? right, and these things you're ignoring kinda render the rest of your argument a little bit irrelevant? and since you were saying that you were only talking about stuff that directly happened onscreen, then surely you have no problem talking about other things that happened directly onscreen, right? like, obviously you have answers for those things too, if this is all so self-evident. right?

...but also, I was genuinely curious who they meant by things being "explicitly stated by reliable narrators," and irritatingly enough I still am because they never fucking answered, just got pissy and flounced. like I'm assuming they meant Mobius and probably Odin? maybe also Thor? but I genuinely don't know because they literally refused to answer! probably because they knew I'm right and didn't want to admit it 🤷‍♀️

anyway. to be 100% scrupulously fair, this person speculated that I "identify with Loki's narcissistic traits and [am] trying to excuse them" rather than outright calling me a narcissist, but...you know, that's...a difference of semantics. I politely brought up some textual evidence about how maybe actually their reliable narrators aren't so reliable and also Thanos's coercion probably extended at least until the Hulk-smashing, and they responded 1) as if I was the person they'd already been arguing with (but then didn't take back any of the aggression when I said I wasn't, so, idk) and b) by personally insulting my character. soooo.

in hindsight it's actually kind of satisfying that they didn't even try to argue with me, just insulted me and flounced, because if they really had a good argument, they could've come up with something. kind of indicates they realized I had a good point and that's why they got so pissed.

honestly the thing that bothers me more is how common this viewpoint is that Loki's a narcissist, which...I hate to blame the show for but I kind of have to, because I don't think it's something I really saw until the show actually used the term, and then everyone started going "haha yes of course" without a second thought even though the vast majority of Loki's behavior isn't even remotely in line with either NPD or the more informal, nonclinical definition of narcissism that people toss around. (although, side note, I did read an absolutely incredible human AU Thorki series where iirc Loki did have clinical NPD, among other things, and it absolutely worked there. uh, mind the tags if you check it out though, maybe especially the parallel series from Loki's POV; it gets very dark in parts.) even aside from perpetuating stigma against real people with real mental illnesses, it's just--such a lazy, shallow reading, you know? and it's...honestly, it's unrealistic. you want me to believe that Loki was a narcissist by the informal definition and completely in love with himself (but also scared and hurt. these things do not fit) and blind to the damage he was doing until Magical Mr. Mobius's therapy session knocked some sense into him and forced him to do some introspection for the first time in his life, and only then did he realize some things that the all-knowing Mobius already knew about him, which caused him to make a sudden, massive personality change? yeah, no. come on. he's not stupid, lying to himself sometimes out of self-defense doesn't mean he lacks self-awareness, and nobody straight-up changes that fast. also if you want to tell me the poor kiddo who was in a constant state of breakdown from the Jotunheim battle onward was also too much in love with himself and that was the real problem, then uh...I don't think we watched the same movies.

...I guess that's the other thing that pisses me off about all this, that people keep putting so much emphasis on what Mobius did, giving him all the credit for the reality check that allowed Loki to become a hero or whatever the fuck. honestly? that was an accident. Mobius saw a potential asset and was perfectly willing to use all kinds of emotional manipulation and psychological torture to get information and see if he could turn this potential asset into a more long-term investment. the reality check wasn't what Mobius shoved in his face, it was what Loki found out on his own and had to accept for himself: that this was all real, that he did still deeply love his family and they still loved him and they were lost to him anyway, and his fucking preordained life ended with him dead at Thanos's hands.

Mobius gave him the opportunity to watch the tape and yelled at him for a while. that's mostly it. Loki did the actual work of grieving and processing everything alone and he deserves 100% of the credit, and actually I'm a lot more pissed about this than I realized. like, even if if that had actually been therapy, or even if we figure Mobius had some charitable intentions toward Loki in there as well as pragmatic ones (which...look, nobody in the TVA is exempt from ACAB so I'm not inclined to give him much benefit of the doubt, is all I'm saying), Loki would still be the one doing the work, and it's some ugly shit to act like this cop who manipulated him should get to take credit for that.

[autisticempathydaemon]

Have never done anything like this before but I wanted to participate because why not!

Hope I'm doing this right- this is for the RedactedAudio Match-up :)

1 - Ok so I have 2 song fixations, first one is "Used to the Darkness" by Des Rocs and the other is "Morning Coffee" by Chevy and Nalba

For Used to the Darkness the specific verse is the chorus, it's a bit long for tumblr but I'll give my reasoning. I've always loved this kind of rock because it reminds me of the 90s rebellion kind of era and this verse strikes me as 'society has forced me down by its standards and is leaving me in the dust because I've "made a mistake", but I'm going to fight because my life hasn't started yet and I'm too young to simply give up'. Every time I hear that chorus it gives me a second wind of sorts and reminds me to just keep going, to keep being stubborn and to keep being me unapologetically.

For Morning Coffee there is no specific line because I resonate with the whole song lol. I'm a very big coffee addict, like I need coffee or tea every day to make it feel right. The reason being is that it's a small comfort treat to help me feel better especially when some days just aren't the best and I need a pick me up to feel better, even if it's a little bit. I listen to this every morning on my commute and every afternoon on the way back home, it's such a big comfort song that I keep on repeat.

2 - 6! (subtype sp) 3 - I love a good video essay! My favourite ones are a bit niche but I especially love SovietWomble's essay about "The Forest" because it's a deep dive critique and explanation of what happens when lore is added to a game post-release and why it's so important to develop it as a whole rather than doing it in bits as it can be the difference of an amazing or completely underwhelming experience. As someone who writes for fun and loves to play games soley for the lore sometimes, I found it useful to develop and hone my skills in world-building and making my stories more coherent. Also because he did a face reveal at the end BUT THAT'S BESIDES THE POINT!

4 - Gosh I haven't talked about my imaginary friend in a bit, her face evades me but I remember she would always help me sleep or play with me when no one else did (so everyday basically). She always wore a yellow dress and had her hair up in pigtails. I never gave her a name because she never needed one, I just called her 'friend', I miss her

5 - Put on a redacted audio vid and fall asleep to that lmfao (usually a david vid)

6 - I honestly don't know what I'd change my name to, sometimes I just wish I didn't really have a name because my self identity fluctuates so much

7 - Favourite redacted audio, hm, tbh any of David's audios. I find myself always returning to one of his videos but I think I like his camping one the most, I cry every time but hearing the stories makes my heart so full and like I genuinely want to comfort him.

8 - Huxley maybe? I love his pairing with Damien but I've never really liked or gotten into his story much, might just be a me thing- but hey he's gay so that's fun

9 - RWBY! Specifically volumes 1-3 because they're so iconic, love the entire series though, I quote it a lot to myself.

10 - Guy, he's as much as a dumbass and gremlin as I am and I THRIVE off of the chaotic energy so much. Plus he can make me pizza while we hang out so that's fun!

11 - Memes, I will start quoting memes. Either that or "Which character would win in xyz situation? A or B?" 12 - 7-11 hot chocolate but instead of milk I put a latte in it

13 - Karu's "How To Train Your Dragon" orchestra cover playlist 14 - smutty audios... idk I just find it fun to scour for a good audio on reddit lmfao

15 - I'm very argumentative and will debate anyone on any topic (I've been a debater for years), but I'm also very much a people pleaser because I like to give people gifts and do acts of service. Uh- does a plushie addiction count as something that'll tell you who I am? I like dnd and Critical Role

Thank you!

Ooh, I love you; you gave me so much information to work with! There were a good amount of possibilities I was working with, but if you’re an argumentative Six, who else can I pair you with but Avior?

You’re both similar in a lot of ways- a love of debate, prone to Acts of Service, Type Sixes who are loyal, thoughtful, and reliable. It’s these similarities but also the differences that make me think you’d be compatible. Avior and his sarcastic, sharp nature would be good at keeping your people-pleasing chaos in check. Your love of storytelling and narratives would be new and so refreshing to him as he’s never put so much thought into fantasy and fiction. He learns to accept your gifts graciously because he wants you to be happy even though he’s not used to it.

Your life together would be so fun; you’d make his life so fun. Avior does not understand your plushie collection, but he tolerates it and comes to terms with their watching eyes every day because he loves you. He also doesn’t understand any of your memes either; he pretends he thinks they’re insipid and pointless, but he actually thinks they and you are cute and silly when you quote them. Also, you’re totally coffee/tea addicts together, and you’ve got the best stocked caffeine cupboards in all of Dahlia.

Song:

Just tea for two and two for tea/ Me for you and you for me alone/ Nobody near us/ To see us or hear us/ No friends or relations/ On weekend vacations/ We won't have it known, dear/ That we own a telephone (oh, I hate telephones) (yeah, me too)

I couldn’t help it; you gave me a coffee song, so I had to give you a tea song in return! I also like it for you, because it’s cute, it’s sweet, it’s singable. It’s not just about tea but love and being together, having tea side by side for the rest of your lives. It’s the kind of song you could sing at Avior, and he’d have to try really hard to not be charmed.

Runner-Ups:

If you’re a DnD fan, I’ve got to give you Lasko as a runner-up; my brain would not allow otherwise! The two of you could write together and be so cute. Asher is your other contender because you’re similar in a lot of ways that would be really fun but more in a platonic, best friend way than romantic like Avior.

note: thank you so much for waiting~! I hope you like your match-up!

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[misdre]

here is an ultimate guide to my book reading ritual. it is the culmination of a progress of a few years

i have four different, hand-written lists of books that i've hung on my fridge door and a wall. one is a list of books recommended to me by people here back when i made a post asking for recs. one is a generic "x number of books everyone should read" from some finnish blog. one is a list of finnish book recs from some finnish blog. and one i have manually compiled from a reddit thread titled something like "genuinely disturbing horror novels" or something similar. i only read books from the latter around halloween so it's mainly untouched, the rest i follow in order, no two books in a row from the same list. i cross a title over when i'm done with it. in the tumblr recommendation post i got some "(any) books by x" recs, so there i just write a little x for each book finished by that author. one of my favourite little moments is getting to open my local library's page and look up a new book from the next list that's up and see where i can get it and then either put a reservation on it or plan when to do the next library trip to get it (usually i get at least two in one go though so more like look up next 2)

sometimes (but rarely, actually) a book just is no good tho and i don't feel like finishing it. i generally give it 100 pages to convince me before dropping it (or something like, 2 hours of an audiobook) and if i'm unconvinced i smudge it over on the list like Shame on you and your entire family.

i have three different bookmarks and choose one that best fits the colour of the covers. the better it fits the more pleased i am. i like also just looking at the current book sitting there with the bookmark that fits nicely

i read books out loud, and getting to pronounce all the names (in non-finnish books) is the best part so i make sure to get them right. sometimes i google how to pronounce things. if it's by an english-speaking author, i pronounce english the british way if it's a british author, american way if it's an american author and so on. i read the entire three musketeers constantly googling french place names

i take a sip of water between paragraph or chapter breaks and have a proper drinking pause every 5 pages. i count the sips so e.g. if there's just one paragraph break within 5 pages, i get 4 sips of water at the end, or if there's none i get the full 5 (this varies so wildly between different books that sometimes i'm taking more like 10 sips in 5 pages and run out of water in the middle. i always use the same water bottle btw. i have a little beyblade coaster for it that's got the BBA boys and usually i position the bottle on top of takao&kai so i always have rei&max visible next to me i'm sorry)

generally i read 20 pages a day in one sitting. it used to be 30 but that felt a bit too much. then if there's something on TV in the evening and it's a commercial channel, i read during the breaks so i get at least 25 pages a day which is my actual goal but this way those other 5 are kinda extra, and sometimes i get even further if there's a lot of breaks, and then i feel like i got a lot of freebie pages and that's great

i've had phases when i basically had one physical book and one audiobook going simultaneously (from two different lists, naturally) but now i don't have any audiobook app subscription anymore. i just found that i wasn't really paying attention to any book i was listening to anymore idk. maybe i'll treat myself a subscription now tho since i'm getting some moneys and have a long daily commute to work. i feel like an audiobook with an unsatisfactory reader can really ruin the whole experience, but then sometimes the experience is just perfect and becomes iconic with my memory of the whole book. it's kind of a gamble

i wrote this down because it's A Great System and also because i started thinking "i'm so weird. like imagine if i explained my whole book reading habit to someone irl. they would think i'm insane" and maybe i am but hey i'm 2 books ahead of my schedule this year on goodreads

[broken-record-system]

Welcome to our System Blog

Hello! :D

I’m guessing you found this one of two ways: you came from my main or AO3 blog, or you just found some random ass post of mine that we sent into the void that is Tumblr.

I have no idea what we’re going to post here, we just made this side blog a while ago in order to make sure no one stole our sys name (although I doubt they would but idk, stranger things have happened). Sometimes we just like to scream into the void and see if someone screams back. Also we have like- zero people we actually know that we’re comfortable talking about our experiences as a system so what better thing to do than to tell strangers on the internet?

Stuff About Us

We are a medically recognized DID system. Collectively we go by Puffs on the internet, we prefer they/them but any pronouns are fine. Transmasc enby, aroace, mentally and chronically ill on multiple levels, the whole shabang. The flag in our pfp is the cupioromantic flag.

We can and will use the block button to its fullest extent. We use the internet to escape the shit that happens in our life, we don’t need it to follow us here. If someone is blocked by us and they don’t know why, they probably fall under any of our hard DNI and we found them before they found us. For safety reasons we like to block people we accidentally come across that we know for a fact are on our DNI to eliminate- or at least lessen- the chances of interacting with them in the future. We don’t keep track of everyone we block, we just kind of do. It can be from a post, a comment they made on someone else’s post, something they reblogged, something they liked, it could literally be anything. Unless it was from years ago and/or they’ve shown that they’ve changed and grown as a person, if they’ve shown that they’ve a /neg weirdo, we’re going to block you.

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Other Blogs

Main Blog: @caffeinated-creampuffs

Ao3 Blog: @j3lly-tarts

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Tag Masterlist

+Will update as we post more on here

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DNI + Userboxes under the cut

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Please Interact! +Other traumagenic systems (I hate using that word but it's what we have to do to keep the endos/endo supporters away on this site ig)

+Anyone not in my DNI. Like literally anyone. If you’re chill and happy to be here and vibe then I’m happy to vibe with you.

Thin Ice

+Antis of any fandom

+Anyone who joined fandom space in general after 2019 (I’m sure some of you are fine but I just don’t trust a lot of you)

+People who lack media literacy but want to/are open to learn

+People under the age of 16. I won’t post anything outright explicit or even suggestive but I’m 18 and going on 19, I just am not that comfortable interacting with anyone who’s more than a few years younger than me.

+Regular Twitter/Reddit posters, too much shit goes on there for me to properly trust any of you right off the bat

+Anyone who doesn’t know proper fandom etiquette.

DNI

+Basic DNI Criteria (homophobia/transphobia, racism, sexism, ableism, xenophobia, fatphobia, pedo/zoophilia, etc.). LIterally just don’t be a gross and/or shitty person

+People who still support “cringe culture” (you guys are fucking weird and not in the cool way)

+People who lack media literacy and refuse to learn

+Fetishizers of ANYTHING. I don’t care what it is.

+Endo “systems” and their supporters    +Just to add, I don’t want any syscourse on any of my blogs. Arguments of any kind, even joking arguments, just generally make me uncomfy as hell

+Anti-furry/therian/neopronouns/xenopronouns/ageregre/anything that does not hurt anyone

+People who demonize or genuinely romanticize any kind of trauma disorder (Cluster-B, OSDD/DID, etc.). Someone just posting about how their life is with a disorder, whether good or bad, both or neither, does not count as romanticization.

+Anyone under the age of 13. Like I said I’m 18 and just don’t feel like interacting with anyone that much younger than me.

+r/FakeDisorderCringe / r/SystemCringe users. Please go touch grass, maybe pick up a book while you’re outside for the first time in god knows how long. 

+AI “artists”

+Shitsreal supporters (I wish you a merry die)    +THIS DOES NOT GIVE ANYONE THE EXCUSE TO BE ANTI-SEMETIC ON MY BLOG!!

REMEMBER THAT DNI GOES BOTH WAYS! If you break your own DNI to harass me I have no problem breaking mine to laugh at you.

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Our Userboxes

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Blog-Specific System Userboxes

[richardsondavis]

Three or four days ago, I was reading this light novel, 86-Eighty-Six-, published and licensed by Yen Press.

I just want to preface this with my opinion of the book, specifically Volume 1. Volume 1 is a masterpiece. A GOD GIVEN MASTERPIECE. It could've worked as it's own standalone novel and I wouldn't complain. It was translated so well, that I didn't realize I was reading something that was translated from Japanese which is hard at times, as made aware by many translators.

Now that that's through, my gripe of the week.

So I was reading Volume 2. I came upon this word while reading and that word was...

This.

"patriarchy"

I was surprised to see it on the book to be honest. I was shocked, appalled. I was livid at the thing I was seeing, was reading.

Why did this word exist here? Is the author woke? Is he with the feminazis? Does he have an agenda?

I asked myself these questions but I also realized that if the answers to these questions were yes then the first volume would have been filled to the brim with woke stuff. However, that is not the case. As I have stated above, the first volume was a masterpiece and I stand by that statement.

I just was not really expecting to see this word that's "loaded". I say "loaded" cause the word has been used so many times by feminists that it's essentially loaded with negative connotations. That no one will take the word "patriarchy" seriously because of how the feminists have used it.

So I reacted the same way I would when you see something woke, I was mad. Funny thing is I always be a little livid at something then I post it on Tumblr where it gets lost to the void. I appreciate doing that but this time I decided to post about it on reddit. A place where I can really get a discussion going.

So to my reddit posts.

I posted in two subs, r/KotakuinAction and r/eightysix.

KotakuinAction is the premiere Gamergate and anti-woke sub of reddit. Been around since '14. If you want to check if something is woke, then you send it to them. They're usually right on the nose.

So my post there is this...

Let me break this down. I have a lack of nuance when it comes to reactions. So when this happened, when I came upon this I was so shocked but I tried to test it with the scanlations I found online.

They were similar in spirit but not entirely synonyms, I have found.

So I really questioned why this was here. Why was the word patriarchy used instead of others?

I wanted to test the raws as well but I couldn't find some, thankfully one of the comments on my post at KotakuinAction did just that.

This really emphasizes my concerns to zero. It really does make sense. And I agree with the tl;dr. I find the entire thing wonky but not malicious.

The gamergate sub also emphasized that I was overthinking.

Very much overthinking.

I agree.

Link to my KotakuinAction post: https://www.reddit.com/r/KotakuInAction/comments/13q5ss5/perhaps_i_lack_a_nuanced_way_of_looking_at_things/

Now onto the 86 subreddit itself, not great stuff there. One comment actually said that it would involve woke stuff like freedom and rights, what the fuck? That's the best part.

Jesus, these woke guys. Anywho, the only comment of value there is the guy that said this...

Yeah. But let me address the other woke guy first. I have not yet gone beyond Volume 3 so I will not be able to confirm nor deny his spoiler claim.

And the fact that he said something about gay characters as if to drive the point that I'd be driven out by that is absolutely debatable and I will really want to see how they're handled. I've had my fair share of yaoi, hopefully it's an organic yaoi with trials and tribulations.

Now that that's done and addressed, the rest of the comments on that post is just about them that it's nothing to worry about too much or in context it makes sense and stuff. All things I consider as well, well not as much but I still have considered them so that counts.

I have gotten over it now and am a little wiser for it.

Link to my 86 subreddit post: https://www.reddit.com/gallery/13q5h0r

With that said, I bid y'all adieu.

Ciao.

[secondbeatsongs]

what can you tell me about what filk is and how it works? i looked up the wikipedia article but i feel like it leaves a lot to be desired and might be easier to get first hand info

so, I'm not necessarily the best person to talk on this, as I've never actually been to an in-person filk circle.

(well, I did sing folk songs with some people at a potluck at a discworld convention in 2013, so that might have counted. but I'm still not 100% on that)

but, I can tell you what I do know! and then hopefully people with more knowledge than me can fill in the gaps.

basically, filk is folk music written and sung by fans, about science fiction and fantasy...except it's also a lot of other things. parody music, comedy music, and pretty much any kind of music that the filkers want to sing.

like, that Scotty Doesn't Know parody I wrote? that's filk, even though it's not folk music. and lots of other stuff is filk too. in many ways, filk is more of a culture than a genre of music.

(and the wikipedia article about it is okay, but for stuff like this, Fanlore is usually going to be a better resource. So, here's the Fanlore article on filk.)

filk has definitely influenced the way I think about music - some people have accused me of lying in that post I made about singing, but I do genuinely mean what I said. the best music I've ever heard has been through filk, sung by people with imperfect voices. but the quality of the voice isn't what matters when it comes to music - it's about the heart of it, and what people put into it.

to quote one of my favorite filk songs, "every act of creation is an act of joy"

another of my favorite songs is "Take it Back" by Kathleen Sloan. if you only follow one of the links from this post, I’d recommend that one, because it’s a really important message, and a great song.

but if you’d like to listen to more filk, the best resource right now is probably this reddit post. a wonderful person by the username of rocketman0739 has been converting old filk tapes and uploading them to the internet archive. and, I am not religious? but he’s truly doing the lord’s work. this is the best quality audio I’ve heard for many of these albums, and seeing someone preserve history like this makes me incredibly happy.

but that’s just classic filk - there’s new filk being created all the time! you can buy CDs and tapes at Prometheus Music, or look around on bandcamp - there are tons of amazing filkers on bandcamp!

(oh! and there’s a great tumblr blog you could follow, @filkyeahfilk​, which has a lot of good information and links)

and if you’d like to join in and become a filker, there are plenty of ways to do that, even if you just want to listen! you can google around to see if there are filk circles local to you (there are many all over the world!), or you can come to a virtual convention like The Festival of the Living Rooms (which happens every other month - the next one is this weekend, starting 11/5, and the schedule can be found at the facebook page I linked above. and don’t worry - they also have a discord server).

I’ve been listening to filk for more than a decade, but I’ve never been able to go to an in-person filk convention, so these virtual cons have been an amazing time, and I really recommend the experience! go listen to other people sing, and you might find that this is something you really need in your life.

and although I’ve linked to a lot of professionally-recorded music here, know that it’s so much more than that - it’s about the people who sing in the circle, because they want to, and because they can, and because they’re taking back their right to sing and play. it’s a very human activity, and I love it.

lastly, I will leave you with another link - just because I’ve had this song stuck in my head a lot recently, and I can’t get over how good it is. so, go enjoy Andrew Ross’ amazing songwriting, and listen to “Greek Humanities (1,000 Ships)”

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

[ramen-rambles]

Quid Pro Quo

Pairing: Kirishima Eijirou x Reader

Warnings: 18+, mutual masturbation, suggestive texts 

Word Count: 2.7K

Summary: From being a total stranger you met on a dead Discord server, to literally becoming one of your best friends — Kirishima was one of the most amazing things to ever happen in your life. But what happens when you accidentally screenshot his nudes?!

A/N: My first BNHarem server collab! I was really close to naming this fic Penis Pals, if I’m being honest LOL It’s a lot shorter than I wanted but I hope I did my baby justice. Thank you to my fellow Bakugou Fanclub members for hyping me up and helping me edit this piece. I literally couldn’t have done it without you guys, ILYSM! Read all the other amazing fics in this collab, here.

Taglist: @lady-bakuhoe @bratwritings @redbeanteax

♡ ⌒*ﾟ.❉・゜・。. ♡ ⌒*ﾟ.❉・゜・。. ♡ ⌒*ﾟ.❉・゜・。.

Ever since you were in high school, you had always looked up to Crimson Riot — a pro hero who’s strong, manly, and fearless. I mean, who wouldn’t like him? Now that you were in college, there have been many other heroes worthy of being called the best, but Crimson Riot was still going to be Number 1 in your eyes. So, to pay homage to your all time favorite hero, you decided to join a Crimson Riot Discord server. 

You had started looking for any server invites through all platforms of social media. Google, Twitter, Tumblr, but nothing came up. You had started to lose hope, until you stumbled upon a very old server link on an equally old Reddit thread. You looked at the date it was posted and it seemed to have been made all the way back when you were in high school. You clicked on the link hesitantly, definitely not expecting it to work. However, much to your surprise, the link brought you straight to the server! 

“Finally! Something that actually fucking worked!” You thought to yourself, after hours of scrolling though numerous pages of the internet. 

You were a bit hesitant at first, not really knowing what to expect. Were people going to think you were weird for being such a nerd? What if people thought you were annoying? Or worse, what if no one liked you? 

But that didn’t seem to be much of a problem… Considering that the server was rather dead. 

You clicked through the channels — #general, #merch, #photos, #announcements; the last time anyone really said anything was nearly six months ago. “God dammit.” You should have known. All you wanted was a place to fangirl over Crimson Riot, was that too much to ask for?! You got all your hopes up, just for it to all come crashing down. Feeling a bit dejected, it seemed like you had no choice but to leave the server. Not like there was much of a point in staying anyways. 

But then you saw a notification pop up on your screen.

RED RIOT [Today at 7:56 PM] 

@Y/N Hey! How are you doing? I’m the admin for this Crimson Riot Discord. The name’s Kirishima. It’s nice to see a fresh face here :^) 

Y/N [Today at 7:56 PM] 

Oh hi! I’m doing good! I found your discord link on a really old Reddit thread so forgive me for asking but… Is this server still active? I was scrolling through the channels and everything seemed kind of dead tbh LOL

RED RIOT [Today at 7:57 PM]

Well, if I’m being honest, it’s fucking dead LMAO 

Y/N [Today at 7:57 PM]

F

RED RIOT [Today at 7:58 PM]

It used to be pretty active before but people just kind of... stopped. I made this server back when I was in high school because I just LOVED Crimson Riot so much, ya know? He was the one person I really looked up to. Anyways, how did you even find this link? You must have looked real hard LOL

Y/N [Today at 7:58 PM]

HAHA I did, actually! Took me for-fucking-ever to find a server link that actually worked :( I’ve looked up to him since I was a kid too and so I really just wanted a place to express my gratitude for the role he played in my life. Sorry LOL I’m getting cheesy 

RED RIOT [Today at 7:59 PM]

Well Y/N, I’m glad you found this server! You sound like a really great person and I’d love nothing more than to talk to you about our shared love for Crimson Riot, but this server is whack as fuck. Are you down to move to DMs instead?

Y/N [Today at 8:01 PM]

Fuck it. Why not? 

You and Kirishima had been talking for a while now. Ever since you came across his Crimson Riot server, you two would talk almost every single day. You learned that he actually lived near you too. Call it fate. Exchanging phone numbers, following each other on social media, starting Snapchat streaks, meeting up with each other — the chemistry between you two made it seem like you’ve known each other your entire lives. The both of you had practically become best friends. 

To you, maybe it felt a little bit more than just friends. 

Currently, you were mindlessly scrolling through your Twitter feed when you saw that you had received a Snapchat notification, from, you guessed it. Kirishima. You were expecting it to just be a bland streak of his room or something but you saw something that made your fucking jaw drop.

A picture of Kirishima in a tight fitting tank top and a very noticeable bulge that was covered by a pair of dark grey sweatpants. 

You felt your cheeks heat up, a red blush painting across your entire face. In a state of panic, you fumbled the phone in your hands and in the process you had heard a very audible click. You fucking screenshotted his snap.

Fuck. 

You quickly went into your messages and texted him to try and explain yourself. 

[Y/N]

WAIT SHIT. KIRISHIMA. I DIDN’T MEAN TO SCREENSHOT THAT. IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. I SWEAR 

Replying almost immediately, you anxiously waited for what Kirishima had to say about your little mishap. You were seriously hoping that he was just going to let it go and you could both just act like nothing happened.

[Kirishima] 

Wow, I didn’t think you’d be the type to screenshot people’s snaps like that, Y/N :( 

[Y/N]

YOU DIPSHIT. I SAID IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. AND WHY ARE YOU SENDING ME SHIT LIKE THAT HUH?!

[Kirishima]

You telling me you didn’t like what you saw? 

[Y/N]

Okay, fine, you looked good, SUE ME. Is that what you wanted to hear?

[Kirishima] 

It’s only fair you send me one back, don’t you think?

You stared at your phone. What the actual fuck. Was Kirishima asking you to send him a fucking nude? You knew it shouldn’t have, but the thought of Kirishima wanting to see your body turned you on. A small shiver running down your spine at the possibility that he liked you in return. 

[Y/N]

Excuse me, sir. I am NOT sending you a nude. 

[Kirishima]

I didn’t ask for a nude, all I said was that you return the favor. Quid pro quo, ya know? 

[Y/N]

Using big words like ‘quid pro quo’, smh. Since when did you become such a politician? 

[Kirishima]

But, if you want to send a nude, who am I to say no? ;)

[Y/N]

Fucking fine. If I show you one, will you shut up?

[Kirishima]

Depends.

[Y/N]

On what, exactly?

[Kirishima] 

On how good it is

Your eyes narrowed at his response. What does he even mean by that, ‘how good it is’? He should be grateful that you even considered sending him one! Based on your replies, it seemed like you were pissed, but in reality, your heart beat faster with every passing minute. You were never the type of girl to send nudes to anyone, but for Kirishima, you were willing to make a small exception. 

You got up from your bed and rummaged through your closet, looking for something that was a bit more provocative. You picked out a red lace bodysuit that hugged your curves and cupped your perky breasts. Sitting in front of your mirror, you touched up your makeup and fixed your hair, checking yourself out one last time before you started taking pictures. You opened up Snapchat and tried multiple poses, making sure the camera captured your sultriness and how good your tits looked. To mock his teasing from earlier you captioned the photo, “Quid pro quo, my ass.” before hitting the ‘send’ button. 

[Y/N] 

Was that good enough for you? 

You heard no response from him for a good five minutes. You started worrying. “Shit. Was that too much? Did I push it too far?” You chewed on the inside of your lip, anxiously waiting for any sort of reaction. 

And then, your screen lit up again. Another Snapchat notification from Kirishima. But this time, it was way more revealing. He had sent you a picture of him palming his erection, and all it said was, “You’re not even here, and look what you did to me :(“ 

Feeling cocky and with a sudden burst of confidence, you cheekily replied, “Why don’t you come here then?” 

In all honesty, Kirishima didn’t live that far from you. You two were only 15 minutes away from each other, meaning that he frequented your apartment whenever he felt like it. He came over a million times in the past, but this time was different. Very different, in fact. Anticipation was building at the pit of your stomach, but so was a familiar heat that began pooling in the middle of your underwear. 

You tried denying your feelings for Kirishima but you couldn’t help it! Everything about him was perfect. His personality, his humor, his voice, his face, his body… You could go on and on about all the things you loved about Kirishima. 

You would have been lying to yourself if you said that you’ve never thought about him with your hands in between your thighs. Thinking about his massive cock fucking your tight pussy, his fingers rubbing your clit in all the right places, or the way his tongue would feel sucking on your hardened nipples. 

You’d always wonder if he ever felt the same way but he didn’t really seem like he was. 

That was, until tonight. 

You stared at the clock on your wall and saw that 10 minutes had passed, a loud knock on your door making you wake up from the dream like trance you seemed to be trapped in. You quickly turned the doorknob, letting Kirishima inside of your apartment. 

Without saying a word, he pushed your back against the wall and began to roughly grab the side of your face. He captured your lips with his, meeting his kiss with the same aggressiveness, making your head spin at how good it felt to finally get a taste of him.

“Do you know how long I’ve waited for us to do this?” He panted, moving down to place sloppy kisses against the crook of your neck, leaving sharp bite marks and dark bruises littered all over your pretty skin.  

“Haaaa, that should be my line” you moaned, “You know how many times I’ve touched myself to the thought of you?” You whispered teasingly, biting the soft flesh of his earlobes. “How many times I wished it was your fingers inside of me instead?” You trailed your fingers down to his, intertwining them with one another before you dragged him into your bedroom. 

You pushed him down onto the mattress, gently getting on top of him and straddling his waist. Grabbing his hands, you placed them on top of your tits, giving them a rough squeeze before you began grinding your wet heat against his clothed cock. 

”Fuck, Y/N, are you sure?” He groaned, “As much as I want this, I don’t want you to do anything you’re not comfortable with —“ 

“Eiji, shut up. If I didn’t want this, would I be this wet for you?” You slipped your panties off to the side, two of your fingers dipping into your cunt, showing off the slick that stringed in between your digits. “Here, see for yourself.” You brought your coated fingers up to his mouth, making him suck it until not a drop was left. 

“Shit, you taste so fucking good,” He smirked, “Why don’t you show me how you touch yourself, princess?” 

You slowly made your way off of him, leaning back to position your body against the plush sheets. Slowly spreading your legs, you made sure he got a good view, your pussy practically dripping from how aroused you had become. You snaked your hands down back against your thighs, fingers finding its way onto your throbbing clit. Kirishima was sitting in front of you, all of his clothes still on.

That didn’t seem very fair, now did it? 

“Stroke your cock for me, Eijirou. Quid pro quo, right?” You said wickedly. You stood up quickly to remove the rest of your lingerie, Eijirou’s eyes glued to your body, watching your every move as you moved your hands back to their previous position. 

Kirishima let out a small laugh before he finally stripped himself of his clothing, pulling down his boxers to reveal his impressive length that was already oozing precum. “Is this what you wanted to see?” You nodded desperately. 

“You wanted to see me jerk off while I watch you touch that pretty pussy of yours?” Kirishima began moving his hand against his girth, gathering spit in his mouth before letting it drip onto the head. Lubricating his cock with a mix of precum and spit, he slowly started moving up and down his length. Matching your rhythm, as he watched intensely at the fingers that were still stuffed inside of your cunt. 

Soft moans started escaping your plush lips, the collective sound of small whines, and frantic gasps beginning to fill the room. “Fuck, Eiji. You look so hot stroking your cock like that. Do you imagine that it was my pussy, instead?” You say, panting intensely. 

“Fuuuuck. I’m gonna pound your tight little cunt so hard that you’re not going to be able to walk for days.” He sped up his pace, you quickly following suit. Your fingers pumping vigorously, you continued to rub tight circles over your sensitive clit. 

You were getting closer and closer to the orgasm you craved so much, and the look that Kirishima had on his face indicated that he was too. Your cunt clenched tightly around your digits while Kirishima’s fist held a vice grip on his cock. You had been waiting for this moment for so long, the intensity of your orgasm was surely going to rip through you like a plundering tidal wave.

 “A-ah, Eijirou! I’m so fucking close for you.” Your eyes squeezed shut as you felt yourself cum all over your fingers, your arousal gushing onto the bed sheets and covering the inside of your thighs. 

Kirishima quickened his strokes, the sight of your pleasure the catalyst for his own release as he continued to jack hammer his cock at an animalistic pace. “Please, baby, cum for me, I wanna see you cum all over yourself.” You whined, watching closely as you patiently waited for him to reach his end. Your filthy words were the last push he needed. 

“F-fuck Y/N! I love you so fucking much” he groaned loudly. A few more pumps, and ropes of his cum started painting his chest white, covering his sweaty body, as the remnants of both your orgasms stained the bed. 

You both looked at each other with half lidded eyes, still trying to come down from your intense highs. Breathing heavily, you looked at him greedily and whispered, “You know, I’ve always wondered how good it would feel to fuck myself on your cock.” 

“Well, I did say that I’d pound your cunt so hard you wouldn’t be able to walk for days...” Kirishima cooed as he ran his fingers along your exposed thigh,

“I’d be more than happy to show you, Princess.” 

♡ ⌒*ﾟ.❉・゜・。. ♡ ⌒*ﾟ.❉・゜・。. ♡ ⌒*ﾟ.❉・゜・。.

[cashweasel]

Have you noticed any differences between the Tumblr Choices Fandom and the Instagram one? If so, which ones?

I’m probably gonna get hated on big time if I answer this 100% truthfully lmao

I also have strong opinions so .. I apologize if for any reason someone doesn’t like this .. it iz wat it iz

I don’t know what you’re getting me into anon but there is a big ass difference between the Instagram and tumblr fandom

I think this counts as a long post so

Well first of all the tumblr fandom is where the real action happens (at least that’s how I feel?) like this is where people actually talk about books, share thoughts, memes, just anything and everything but the Instagram fandom most of the time is just like .. pass screenshots and yeah there’s not much really

The tumblr fandom is straight up crAZY you guys start talking shit about pb and I’m scared but Instagram fandom they take what they’re given happily actually it’s also the only place I’ve seen anyone talk about how excited they are for the smut books and I’ve been on Facebook and reddit too

This might be a personal opinion but almost everyone in the tumblr fandom is closer to me age wise so it’s cool and I really enjoy interacting and making friends here HOWEVER .. when it comes to the Instagram fandom .. it’s just .. let’s say there’s been multiple occasions where someone wants to be friends and then I discover they’re +20 years older than me and I just .. don’t know I’m sorry I’m uncomfortable kskdkd the conversation absolutely does not the same vibe

Instagram fandom has some good content sure but tumblr probably has more variety

And FINALLY .. the WORST thing ever guys I’m not gonna even apologize if you’re from the ig fandom and you’re reading this here and you’re offended or whatever but .. 👏🏻 CONTENT THEFT 👏🏻 DEALBREAKER !!! especially those freAKING VIDEO EDITORS listen sis I did video editing myself too back when it was still very rare and there were only like 3 video editors in the fandom and we were all respectful so no bitch you got nO excuse .. I just can’t tell you how many people STEAL.FUCKING.ART for their video edits GAAAAHHH the amount of times I’ve seen an artist or a commissioner rant and people telling me about their/ my art stolen and put in edits without credit or permission .. HOW FREAKING HARD CAN IT BE I MEAN- HONEY IT IS STEALING “oH i jUsT FoUnD iT oN gOogLE / TuMbLr” NAH HONEY YOURE JUST TOO LAZY you can literally retrace a source of a post on google and tumblr always shows you who the original poster is no matter who reblogged it and where you got it from also people on tumblr almost never repost art without proper source referencing and it’s fUUUUCCKKING DISRESPECTFUL!!! Oh my gOD the watermark is literally RIGHT THERE!!! And then it’s even worse when they pretend they don’t see you or like take complete 100% full credit for the edit like da fuk not sis that’s MY work in that edit of yours that probably won’t exist without iT SO GIVING VERY BASIC CREDIT IS VERY BASIC DECENCY MY DUUUDDE! YOURE PRACTICALLY SPITTING IN MY FACE THAT WAY FAM Listen y’all I’m a very nice person I’m the nicest person you’ll ever meet but god how many times I was THIS 👌🏻 close to fighting a bitch because of that but yeah anyway the point is tumblr fandom doesn’t do that lol

[phoenotopia]

2020 October Update

So... we've launched. And our launch was... actually kind of... bad...

This is a dev blog, so I'll speak on it. But before that, we do have the game's steam page up. If you're anticipating the PC release, please do visit the steam page and add it to your wish list. It would help us a lot.

VISIT STEAM LINK

...

So what didn't go so well?

1. We launched in Nintendo's Americas and Europe territory. If you've been following the release, you'd know that America got the game first. We didn't move to launch in Europe at all since I thought the EFIGS languages (English, French, Italian, German, Spanish) were pre-requisites for Europe. By the time I learned that this wasn't necessarily the case, and attempted to course correct, the damage was done. We had half the allotment of keys to do outreach, and maybe some European outlets that would've covered us, did not.

2. When the game launched, rather than a victory lap, what we experienced was more of a public lashing. We did get some reviews that praised the game highly, but just as many reviews lampooned the game for its high difficulty or other failings. I've since released two patches (or 3, depending on how you count it) to address the difficulty. A lot of overnighters. If you recall in the last blog post, I thought it'd be a good start if we got 20 or so reviews on Open Critic. But we've only 8 as of this writing, and the aggregate score isn't so hot. So that's a fail by my metric.

3. A publisher reached out to us because they were interested in physically printing the game! Yay! But... to advance our talks, they wanted to see the game's sales numbers to ensure that there's a good chance their investment could be recouped. And unfortunately, the game's sales numbers are pretty low. They backed out :(

Some hard lessons were learned. The biggest lesson for me concerns how well we playtested the game. Looking at the original playtester list, it's a short list. You may recall from a previous blog post that our ability to test was severely hampered by technical limitations. Add to that, a lot of people on this list are objectively really achieved players. We're talking power ranked in Smash Bros, regular tournament goers, and people who've played and bested every Souls game. And as the maker of the game, I am most blind to the game's challenges.

Now, I'm definitely more of the opinion that you prioritize PC development first. I still have some reservations about some stages of PC development. But if you do PC/Steam first, you have the great benefit of being able to do Early Access, which gives you access to a greater testing pool. I now view it as an invaluable part of the equation. If we had been able to do Early Access for 1 or 2 months before release, we probably could have ironed out most of the game's difficulty and balance problems. Hard lessons, indeed.

There were a lot of other notable events that occurred over the past 2 months - the travails of press outreach, realizing my own limits as a developer, feeling defeated and getting back up again, etc. There's too much stuff to chronicle or go into detail. But it wasn't all bad.

Some good things did happen...

We got a publisher to publish for Japan! It came as a huge relief, because clearly, we don't know what the heck we're doing.

The publisher has been an invaluable source of information and feedback. They've recommended some changes to the game to improve user experience. Some of these changes I was hesitant to do at first because they concerned systems I thought integral to the identity of the game. But after trying it, I have to admit, they're good changes.

So a Japanese version of the game was moving ahead. And it looked like that'd be it. I wasn't planning to move forward with any other language translations due to the game's low sales and our funds being depleted. 

But, I was approached by a translator who urged me to move ahead with translations. He told me he was willing to work for only a small price initially and then be paid the rest after from a percentage of the game's sales until the cost of the translation was paid in full.

I was surprised translators were willing to work under such a model since it's entirely likely the game's current low sales trajectory would continue and they wouldn't earn back the full cost of translation. But I was also flattered they were willing to take a risk with me. After that, I approached some others with the same hypothetical deal, and long story short, we're now moving forward with French, German, Spanish, Portuguese and Russian translations. As for why these languages in particular, they were languages for whom I had contacts (because they reached out to me at some point in the past). And also because they were deemed more likely to be profitable based on their home country's gaming market/buying habits. I'd be personally happy to have my native language be represented, but it's not expected to be a profitable territory. But if the game does better in the future, it may justify the costs of translation. There could be a chance!

The plan right now is to get the game supporting these first round of languages and then to patch that into the Switch version as well as launch the PC version with these languages - all in December. A lot of things need to align for this to occur, so a delay isn't out of the question. It'll be busy... I'll update the blog again in latter half of December, probably near the game's PC launch date... OR to announce a delay. Let's hope it doesn't come to that.

Fan Support

While the past two months have been grueling, one good thing remains constant - fan art! Thank you everyone who submitted. It means a lot to me and the team!

Big thanks to Pimez who's taken on watching over the reddit community as moderator. He also combs the other communities and makes sure I see every new art piece. Despite juggling his own life and all these tasks, he still found some time to draw.

Pimez's piece reminds us that just because the new game's out doesn't mean we can't still celebrate the original flash game. The jail dog is a dog found only in jail and only in the flash game. I imagine Gail is just tossing a stick, and they're playing fetch.

A new artist to this scene æv draws both the Phoenix logo AND a super cute picture of Gail playing the flute. So precious, you want to pinch her cheek. Even the Sand Drake is enthralled!

Another new artist, beet4ppy arrives on the scene with two pictures! One features a no-nonsense battle-hardened Gail looking stoic and tough! Kinda reminds me of Vinland Saga actually. The other, a more cheerful group composition - I must say I'm a big fan of Fran's classic anime-style eye!

A returning artist, Cody G, returns with a picture depicting the tribulations of cooking. Gotta love Gail's frantic expression! I've heard the complaints, which is why we've added an option to slow the cooking mini-game down. An improved button font is also on the way.

Gamesing with two undertale x phoenotopia crossovers. Thomas being a robot builder makes sense taking a role similar to Alphys. But why is Alex dressed like a clown? Perhaps there is a hidden meaning here... 

A new artist, Warotar, draws both a pooki wearing Gail's clothes and Gail wearing pooki clothes. Awww. The pooki is a bit scary - it kinda reminds me of a tragic event in a certain anime. But the Gail is adorable!

POL#5655 submitted this one to KM's discord which made its way to me. Here, a stylized Gail appears unnerved by the dark red eyes stalking her in the background. Are they bats or something more sinister?

A new artist, MilesCPW, arrives on the scene with three rare well-vectorized arts! Love it! One scene depicts Gail balancing a bomb on her head - that's a speedrunning trick I only learned about recently after someone emailed me a video O_O

The other drawing gives us new insight into Katash - he could actually look cute if he wasn't trying to kill you.

And the bees... Okay, this one got a chuckle from me :D

A returning artist roccy_chair draws this heart-warming scene from the beginning of the new game. Aww. Mika doesn't get much screen time for story reasons, so it's nice to see her represented.

UnrealWorld_32 returns with another drawing of Gail in Panselo, this time capturing a more idyllic time. I like the tranquil nature of this piece. And Gail does in fact play the guitar, denoted by the guitar in her room.

Returning artist shafiyahh draws a nice portrait of Prince Leo - looking regal and princely. I like the storybook art style of this piece. It made me immediately think of "the Little Prince" - one of my favorite books actually!

Negativus Core returns with a beautiful group composition of Gail and the gang - flying from a Switch shaped window - totally sensible considering the game is only Switch right now. As usual, I'm impressed by Negativus Core's use of challenging angles to frame a more dynamic shot of the characters. Great job!

And it wasn't only artists bearing the banner. I'd like to give a big shoutout to everyone in all the game's little communities (from the reddit to the discords to this tumblr). I've seen this community help newcomers with gameplay and walkthrough advice, discussions, updating the wiki, and so on. It does bring a smile to my face. Thank you everyone!

[imanativeofswlondondahling]

Hiding in Plain Sight (1)- Tom Holland X Reader

Word Count-1792

A/N: This was inspired by this wonderful post by @starsholland. Without it this would not be happening. This will be a multi part fic, but I don’t know how many chapters or when it will be posted so if you’d like to be tagged let me know:)  Welcome to Tom being undercover on Tumblr. Quick notes- Y/T/B = Your Tumblr Blog, Y/A is your age :)

“You’re not going to make me go undercover on Tumblr are you?” Tom asks as they hook up the mike to his white t-shirt. “I’ve heard dangerous things about that site.”

“No, no. We’re sticking to Reddit, Twitter, Youtube. Maybe some Quora and IMDB.” The redheaded assistant sitting across from him states as she places the GQ laptop across from him. Tom sees Harrison’s shoulders silently moving up and down, laughing at the idea of him having to go undercover on the site that he had been telling horror stories of for weeks leading up to this interview. “If any of these don’t sound good to you, we can skip them.”

“No, those sound fine.” Tom says. “I’m ready whenever you are.”

“Camera A ready?” She asks the camera man sitting diagonally from where she is. In response she gets a nod. “Tom when you’re ready say something like I’m Tom Holland and I’m going undercover on the internet to answer your questions. It’s actually me. Something like that.”

From across the room Harrison watches as Tom flows through the questions easily, hoping from site to site with better technical luck than he normally has. He can guess that some of the answers will be giffed and blasted around social media within minutes of this interview going live. It would shock him if it didn’t.

“Check it out mate.” On his screen flashes Tom saying I drink tea darling over and over again. “Your fans love it. Which is good, seeing how upset a lot of them are over the Disney/Sony thing.”

“Where is this?”

“Your favorite site.”

“Instagram?”

“Tumblr.” Tom rolls his eyes and falls back into the couch.

“Why are you even on there?”

“Why aren’t you? So many fangirls, so little time.” Tom shoots a dirty look at Harrison. “But in all seriousness, there’s a lot of great reactions and gifs that you can only find on Tumblr. You should check it out.” Tom reaches for Harrison’s computer but he pulls away. “Make your own account. It costs nothing.”

“Ugh, fine.” Pulling his phone out of his pocket, downloads the app and creates an account. Expecting one of the fangirls to have already have taken his common username, he’s surprised to be able to fill out the form with tomholland2013 as his username. Will that seem too much like him? Who knows. It’s not like he’s planning to actually use this site. He just using it to see what Harrison wants him to see. “What do I look up?”

“Just search the hashtag Tom Holland and look under recent for the most recent stuff. Most of it is your undercover interview. Or you can look under the Tom Holland top posts and see what your fans are obsessed with.” Tom is on the main page and sees a suggestion of blogs. A lot of them have his name intertwined in them with his picture as the profile picture. Guess it wouldn’t hurt to follow some blogs while he’s on here? 

The first one he follows is @starsholland who seems to write fanfictions about him but also shares a lot of marvel pictures. By clicking follow it brings up a lot of suggested blogs to follow. He clicks on @tonguetiedholland and sees another fanfiction writer but also a lot of posts between them and other bloggers. “Is this site just fanfiction?”

“No, there’s pictures and edits and stuff too. Why? You only interested in the fanfiction?”

“I only seem to find fanfictions.” Tom replies as he clicks on a blog called @tomhollandsstan, finding a mix of fanfictions, pictures and conversations. However his eyes scroll through one of the fics and find something much more raunchy than he anticipated finding. “Holy hell. What are they writing all of this about?”

“Reading something steamy Tommy?” Harrison teases. Tom feels his face flush with the embarrassment of knowing that there are girls and guys out there picturing stuff like this with him as the main feature. 

“I’m getting off this site. It’s bloody porn.”

“No wait, you’ve just stumbled down the wrong path. Let me send you some blogs to look at.” Harrison pulls up some of the ones that are mostly pictures and reactions. “What’s your tumblr handle? I’ll send them to you?”

“Tomholland2013.”

“Really? It wasn’t taken?”

“Nope.”

“See how long it stays secretive.”

“I don’t plan on using it.” Tom says as he hits follow on some of the other blogs that Harrison sent him, including one that was @Y/T/B. He found himself scrolling through it a little more in depth than he had with any of the other pages he had been on. The posts and your reactions were more what he expected of tumblr. Glee filled, but not thirsty. Hitting follow was a no brainer.

Across the country, your phone lights up as you get a notification from Tumblr. You’re about to swipe it away, since your day is currently going down hill as the recipes you’re in the middle of trying out are turning into pinterest fails. Also you should have checked before you started baking a cake that you had powdered sugar to make frosting, so you’ll have to do another pinterest deep dive for a frosting recipe since you can’t use your tried and true recipe.

However, the name on the notification catches your eye- Tomholland2013 has followed you. Wow someone finally snatched the name. There had been jokes around the fandom for months that someone should snag the name so Tom could have it whenever or if-ever he decided to join tumblr. But it seems someone has decided to be Tom. Whoever it is though seems to enjoy your posts because they’re liking your posts in succession. While your stand mixer whirls, you open to their blog and see there’s nothing there. Not even a banner or an icon photo. They must be a super new blog. You back out of their blog and almost back out of the app when you see a message from this Tom Holland wanna be.

From: Tomholland2013

I really like all your edits of Tom. Can I use one as my profile pic? X

You pause for a second before replying. This person wasn’t the first to ask to use one of your edits as a profile picture. Why does this feel different though? It has to just be because of the name. You click to reply to the ask.

I’m so surprised someone finally took the name. Me and @imanativeofswlondondahling had a bet going on for how long it was going to stay open in case Tom wanted it. Anyway, feel free to use my edits, or if you have a favorite picture of Tom, send it my way and I’ll make an edit for you.

You hit send on the ask before you can change your mind and then you turn back to your cake- which has probably been overwhipped now.

“Do I have a favorite picture of Tom?” Tom mumbles to himself as he reads over your reply. He’d love to see something that was made for him, but that means finding a picture of himself that he wants edited. “Harrison, com’ere mate. Take a selfie with me.”

“What’s this for?” Harrison asks before posing. @Y/T/B wouldn’t know this was just a selfie. You’d probably think he just did a Google deep dive.

“Need a profile picture. For my blog.” Tom teases, before clicking back to his messages on tumblr. There has to be a way to send a direct message instead of an ask like he did before. He had been planning to use an edit you had done of him saying I drink tea darling, but he wasn’t going to toss up having a custom made icon. After fiddling around on the app for a few minutes Tom finally figures out how to send a message and sends the picture he had snapped with Harrison a few minutes earlier. He tacks on a quick message asking her to do whatever she wants with the picture and to take as long as she wants and or needs. After hitting send, he clicks back to your blog's main page, trying to learn more about you.

At the top of your page, simply stated, it reads Y/N, Y/A, Tom Holland Fan. Well that does tell him you’re around his age, so that makes him feel less like a creeper. He wants to know everything he can about you, but all he can find through scrolling is mainly, well him. He can’t explain why, but there’s a sort of pull towards you from what he can find in your messages to other people and responding to anon messages, you seem like someone he’d want to be friends with. You have a great sense of humor and make jokes as often as you can in your messages. 

“Haz, can I turn on notifications for, like a certain blog?” Tom calls across the living room.

“Thought you weren’t going to use it.”

“There’s a couple blogs I like.”

“Sure, let me show you.” Tom passes his phone over and watches as Harrison turns on notifications for your blog. “Oh she’s great. Her reactions when news is posted is great.” A notification pops up on your screen. “Apparently she just posted.”

A cake maker I am not destined to be. Gordon Ramsay will make an idiot sandwich out of me.

A picture of a very sad looking cake appears under her text. “Maybe she should stick to making edits.” Harrison jokes. 

“Mate, that’s rude.”

“But it’s not wrong. Plus it’s not like yours would look much better.”

“Mine would be worse.” Taking his phone back, he clicks on the comment bubble and types out: looks better than anything I would make X His inbox dings a couple moments later. 

How have I never seen this photo of Harrison and Tom? Did it get posted while I was attempting to bake?

I think it’s an old photo. Found it on my phone. X And technically that’s not a lie.

Well I’ll hop on that edit. Any colors you prefer?

Blue or Red would be good I guess. X

I’ll get right on that. What’s with all the x’s?

Oh it’s a European thing. It’s just how we sign off texts and messagesX

If it’s annoying I can try and not do it?X

It’s fine. Just didn’t know why it was there. 

Do you think Tom does it?

Oh most definitely. What kind of Brit would he be if he didn’t?X

Well I’ll go get on the edit, hopefully I’ll have it done in the next day or so

No hurryX

Thanks againX

[reinelefey]

OKAY, SO. I DID A THING. AND I TERRIFIED MY FUCKING SELF. I DID NOT WANT THIS TO WORK THIS WELL. OH MY GOD. So. I saw this on Reddit (I got curious what reddit actually was after the stock thing):

I found that.

NATURALLY... My brain IMMEDIATELY thought of the "What's a conspiracy you 100% believe" TikTok. Now. I don't believe this. I wrote it out as a... I don't know... Maybe a way to flex my writing muscles, and process the events of the last couple of years. And...well... Let me share it with you.

"Okay, so, like... On the one hand this guy is an idiot. On the other hand... This year HAS been really V for Vendetta already... So... I mean... The second sticker is unfortunately all too believable.

Sadly, the logic of it is almost sound.

You have a terrified populace, divided on racial lines, fighting the authority of the state. You start talking about how we need to make the country great, you read about Hitler, and you have an idea. You remember that during WWII, your country more or less unified to fight a common enemy, or so the history books say. You have a laboratory sample of a SARS COV virus that mutated after the last outbreak.

So do you break the Geneva Convention, and use it on another world superpower to destabilize them?

Do you use it to foster compliance from the people of your own country who sprint closer to rebellion every day?

"So," says your little mind, "So, I have a choice to make."

And in the back of your mind you think "Por Que no los dos?"

So, the virus is released in the rival superpower, and owner of most of your country's debt. If you get it into a remote area, away from the Capital, it'll have time to spread before it's detected as anything more than a bad cold.

Next, release the virus on your own population, this time, in the population centres. New York, California, Florida, and Texas are immediately overrun with cases. Those with weak immune systems are dying off, but stronger immune systems are recovering.

Begin blaming China once the news of the virus is worldwide. Call it the China flu on national television, and stir up the proletariat against a common enemy.

Continue to promote the idea that the "China Flu isn't worth wearing a mask for, because it infringes on your rights as Americans!"

Millions are dead. Housing prices are sky high, fuel prices rocket to heights not seen since the 2007 recession began. Unemployment is at an all time high, millions more are dying.

A child is killed.

Things have backfired. You underestimated how passionate people can be.

The country is more divided than ever, people like you are dying, a vaccine is created, and even though you tried to censor the FUCKING CDC, people are getting vaccinated. You catch the virus, and receive a treatment so expensive it is literally more inaccessible to normal people than Jeff Bezos' empathy.

You receive news. Not enough people are getting the vaccine. You're getting voted out of office. You're being impeached. You failed in what you set out to do with all this death. You can't release your power until you see it through. You remember a similar situation in a time you have tried so hard to emulate. You reflect on your reign of terror: putting a rapist into a lifelong position of power, where he gets to make decisions about legality, openly praising the "good people" of the FUCKING KKK, getting exposed for keeping a copy of your role model's speeches by your bed, your fucking concentration camps, and you think "Gee, WWHD?" And it comes to you.

You call a press conference. You speak passionately about people you call "the enemy," you tell your cult like followers to fight for their country. To ignore election results which showed your pathetic ass lost by a landslide. You realise that we HATED you so much, we flipped fucking red states blue. You speak, whipping them into a frenzy, waiting for the tension to break. You suggest they walk to Capitol Hill. That's the spark. That's the match to the tinder you needed. You watch, rapt, as your sheep file down the road to the Capitol building, doing their shepherd's will.

You see them come against resistance, and you wonder if the systemic racism that you've worked so hard to foster in the police will work in your favour.

It does.

The Capitol is under siege, and you are to blame.

You leave office gracelessly, hoping to stay relevant in the minds of your people. You hope they count you as a martyr to the "socialists" taking over the country. You know your history. You needed to take this step back, to take the next steps forward.

You have four years to plan. Four years to come up with the next "enemy." You have time. There's still one more group of people that can be used as scapegoats... You can bide your time.

(I hate that that came from my mind. And I especially hate that I 100% did not want that to fit as well as it did. But, uh... There's that.)"

There have been edits made to the text here on Tumblr, to fix typing errors I made in the original post.

I... Guys. Guys, I scared mySELF. Like. I know this PROBABLY not what happened, right. But. Like. ITS ANNOYINGLY FUCKING PLAUSIBLE FOR THAT SHIT STAIN TO HAVE DONE.

I swear to all the gods. If he fucking runs in 2024, I'm not even waiting. I'm getting me, and my family OUT.

[the-darklings]

—𝗖𝗢𝗔 𝗙𝗔𝗤;

Hello, everyone! So with COA being such a long-running series and new readers finding it constantly, I have come to realise that a lot of questions I get often repeat. So to keep everything easy and clear and friendly for everyone regardless of whether you started COA at the very beginning of the story or just recently found it, I have spent the day relaxing, eating junk food, and compiling this FAQ. Please read through it because chances are the answers are here somewhere. I have sectioned the guide into following: general, story, ships, original squad (OCs), AUS, OC!V and tips/advice. If the answer to your question is not here, please feel free to send me a message and have a wonderful day! <33 - kat.

GENERAL:

when does this story update?

I try to keep a bi-weekly schedule (now usually Sunday updates). But I always let you know when the chapter is done by making a final word count post (pre edits). 

do you have a masterlist?

yes, you can find it here.

do you have a tag list?

not for COA. they’re very time consuming and I’m already really busy sorry :(

are your requests open?

I rarely open my inbox for requests. the only exception being the monthly blurb nights. then I reblog a prompt list and let people send some requests in for any fandom/ship. however, usually due to how many I get, it only happens every few months. that being said, you can still send me ideas/suggestions and if it inspires me, I will write it. that’s how the majority of the AUs have come about. but i’m also a very busy person so sorry if I can’t. 

can I make X or Y for COA and tag you?

yes. yes. yes. please, please, feel free to create whatever for COA (no matter how small or silly) because I consider it a great honour that I’ve been able to inspire someone else. whatever it is, please tag me. I wanna see.

okay, I made a thing and tagged you but you didn’t respond :(

Tumblr is notorious for eating my notifs. whatever it is (art/post/etc) if I don’t respond to it in a day or two, please give me a nudge. you’re not being annoying, I promise. chances are I missed it/tumblr ate it. 

I wanna scream/discuss/theorise about COA with others, is there any way for me to do that?

my amazing readers have set up this reddit page that is full of lovely people, theories, and memes etc. I check it often and interact on there, too, so feel free to drop by.

STORY:

how many chapters will COA be?

25. the last one being a very long epilogue.

have you decided on the ending yet?

yes. from as early as part 2. it's barely changed since. 

will we ever see more of Prague/Naples? hoe, please say yes.

yes. I plan to write both as COA bonus stories after the main story-line concludes.

will there be a sequel? 

depends. on two things: 1) if anyone will even care by that point 2) time. this story has consumed 5 months of my life entirely. i’ve been incredibly strict with myself when it comes to writing it (in a good way) but at best it won’t be finished till the end of august/beginning of september. so likely even if I do, there will be a break for a few months at least. I do have ideas though.

you promised us smut. where is it?

patience is a virtue. ;)

happy ending or tragedy? (please don’t say tragedy, you monster)

I would describe it more as “bittersweet” but whether it leans more towards bitter or sweet you’ll have to see.   

SHIPS:

any endgame hints?

you know more about the ending than you probably realise

can v/s finally go to Paris? for the love of GOD? pLEASE?

no

hector + v? powerful. will there be more of them in the future? 

agreed & yes. hector and v have their own arc to go on. it’s actually one of my favourites in this story. I don’t want to say more than that right now because I have plans for their dynamic so no spoilers. :)

please stop bullying john. give us some j/v content please? 

i, for one, adore john. it’s team S that’s bullying him lol. but wait till parabellum. i’ve always referred to that portion of the story as the second coming of j/v.

does lucien actually have a thing for v or is it a creepy obsession? 

it’s both.

I ship v with everyone :/ is that bad?

the sky is the limit. ship all the things proudly (but seriously, no, it isn’t. I ship all the ships, too, and that’s the fun of it) 

v/elder tho? 👀

🔫🤡

j/v or s/v? be honest.

you fool,,,, you buffoon. ot3 j/v/s is where it’s really at. imagine their POWER.   

ORIGINAL SQUAD:

what do the Elites/Lovers look like/how old are they?

please refer to this

will there be more step??

of course. he’s my baby. :)

will we see more of camorra/learn more about the elite’s and their backstories?

while I would love to take the time and flesh them all out with full backstories, only hector will be getting his backstory explored in the main canon because plot.

does lucien care for mika anymore or has he replaced her with v?

lucien is a messy hoe. mika is his subject of “affection” but v is his foil and equal. he recognises the same hurt in her that he has gone through himself so it’s more of a fixation. with time, lucien would likely destroy v so no bueno. 

I ship our OCs.

I do, too.

can we write about your OCs/V?

so you would have to come to me and discuss this more in private but I’m fine with this sort of thing usually. in fact, a prequel hector story already exists so you’re likely good but please contact me first. 

AUs:

when/how often do you update the vampire!au?

whenever I have time/inspo. mainly time. so this means you can get it daily or not get it for several weeks because COA is priority. I keep you all updated on when I have something cooking tho.

what is the actual pairing for vamp!au?

undecided as of yet. i’m leaning more towards ot3 right now but we shall see.

how often do you update flowing in me?

same as the above. whenever I have the time but I will keep you updated.

how many parts will flowing in me be?

I have 5 parts(ish) planned.

do you have a tag list for flowing in me?

I will. please leave a comment on the story if you want to be tagged in future parts!

will flowing in me feature other characters (john, winston etc.)?

this story is mainly camorra-centric but I do plan for John to appear at some point.

how did you come up with your lore in vamp!au?

to be completely honest....I just wrote a bunch of stuff down and used what stuck. mostly the ideas were pulled out of thin air while still trying to keep within the spirit of the canon material (the high priest, the holy church, the twelve priests, john being the boogeyman etc). camorra as the natural enemy seemed fitting and santino as a vampire prince even more so.

can we send you new au ideas/expand on old ones (manager!V etc)?

yes, always. I always try my hardest to reply but ofc I can’t promise I’ll be able to use them all but thank you in advance.

OC!V:

who is the face claim for OC!V?

weronika spyrka

what is her real name?

clara

how old is she at the beginning of the story and now?

23 beginning of chapter 1, 30 beginning of chapter 4 (current timeline)

will/would you ever write an original story about her?

I have considered creating something original out of COA itself or one of its sister series/concepts (like FIM). since I really started working on COA during last year’s NaNo, that might be the time I create something original this year. 

TIPS & ADVICE:

how do you write so much, so quickly?

I don’t think that word count is really reflective of the quality work itself. I don’t think you should worry how much you write, either. 100 words can be just as valuable as 1k. most of them time I have a deadline breathing down my neck and I do work well under pressure so that inspires me to force the chapters out. I also do very long days because despite what it might look like I’m not a fast writer.

how can I improve my writing?

read and practice. I know it’s dumb and overused advice but it’s how I learned english and found my style (still a mess and WIP) but still this advice does help. 

how do you keep motivated?

spite, your support, genuine adoration for these characters/word, a lot of spite. 

do you plan? outline?

I have a vague story outline with specific scenes in mind as I go along (helps to set up foreshadowing, twists, and those ‘full circle’ moments). I also plan each chapter scene by scene and know what each chapter is meant to accomplish. So yeah in a sense. 

[bloodgutsanchocolatecake]

Called my boyfriend a fucking asshole yesterday because he didn't put gas in my car and I got stranded at Walmart on my way home from work which is only 2 miles from where I live and I was soaking wet from pouring rain and running a fever from my vaccine.

He didn't take that well and honestly I was out of line to speak to him like that, it's not necessary to speak unkindly to people like that even if I'm frustrated. But highkey I think he's been frustrated with me lately and has been starting a lot of fights because of it bc he started a fight last night where he felt the need to tell me we're in different generations bc of our age gap and we're not. We're just not. We went through generational thing that my peers younger than me didn't and that shows. But he does this now and then it bugs me that he can't admit we're in the same generation? Like he has to other me bc he grew up on reddit and I grew up on tumblr and I'm more knowledgeable on social action and social justice for it, and specifically pursued social justice positions when I was in hs. It has nothing to do with "my generation" being more tolerable. Shit was not that much more accepting. We were all afraid to come out. There was not a single out trans kid in my high-school, and I can count the out lgbq people on one hand. Kids still get beat for being gay but he lives in this bubble like he thinks everyone is accepting now, or was accepting during my time, and it's not true. I understand what it was like when he was in hs. He puts it on Gen Z for this tolerability existing like he had nothing to do with it but it's our generation and the generations before us that did the work that allowed these things to make it into mainstream and Gen z is getting to grow up in a more tolerable world for it.

The pig headed-ness is really obnoxious and the need to establish some sort of other or intellectual superiority because he's older is freaky. Because I had called my mom earlier to ask if I was the asshole for calling him an assholeand she off-handedly mentioned my dad would start fights about him being older and therefore smarter and my dad is a monster...like my bf played it out exactly like my mom said my dad used to.

It freaked me out so bad when this argument started and then after it got worse and he just couldn't admit that I'm not fucking clueless or green to what it was like to grow up in the early 90s/2000s. It's bothering me so bad. I should let the whole.tjing go but it hit me I might be making a really terrible generational mistake if I we get married...

But also I'm dependant and I could never leave him.

It also got worse in which I called a break bc he knife handed me and that's a no no bc he hates when I'm knife handed and I won't allow hypocrisy. But when we cooled off he needed to find another example of how he's superior in something and this time it was childhood trauma. No I don't understand what it's like to have been beaten and I don't act like I do. But I was also touched and stuck with needles in places I was taught no one should touch me in w/o permission and it was all acceptable because I was sick and it was medically necessary but it fucked me up really bad.

Not to mention he had to reiterate that I have my dad's temper and he doesn't worry about me turning into my mom like I do but me turning into my dad. This is the 3rd time he's said this to me recently and I don't know if I should take it constructively or with a grain of salt because I felt a little manipulated yesterday and it freaked me the fuck out.

Not to mention when he says that to me I want to take a blade and slice up my skin and let all the blood I share that's his bleed out. Because when I say he's a monster I mean it... we're currently not speaking and won't ever again because I found out he was stealing money from me and that's not the worst things he's done. It makes me sick to think I could be anything like him. I'm scared of the parts of myself that are him. I'll kill myself before I end up like him and that's not a joke. I'm terrified of becoming a monster too. I'm terrified there's a darkness inside me.

I don't know whether to bring up that behavior to my bf and be like "listen if you're going to use my parents relationship as a means to point out red flags there are some red flags from last night that have me really freaked out" but I don't want to bring up our petty argument which he wouldn't admit that I'm not some green newbie to the world that grew up in some liberal accepting bubble. I don't want to argue anymore than we already have been lately.

I know he started that fight because he was still mad about what I'd called him and had some fight in him and didn't expect me to be like you're right, I should not have spoken to you that way and I'm sorry. Because after unpacking everything it all boiled down to the fact I haven't been very pleasant or pulling my weight recently bc I'm overwhelmed with everything on my plate. Which is totally valid but I'm really caught up on how everything that went down last night went just to get to that. I'm not ok with it even if I'd done something wrong.

Fuck this post is long. I'm so freaked out and I don't want to talk to him rn. I don't know if I should drop it for now and wait till my current stressors are gone and bring it up next time it comes up (it will),or if I should bring it up tn even though we've been fighting a lot.

[freckled-words]

Count The Teeth - Part Eleven

I am just. I don’t even know? I swear I remember posting this final chapter last year with the whole series, I swear I did, but as far as my tumblr account can tell, it doesn’t exist.....I hate tumblr sometimes, I really do. So if this is already in existence, then let’s just roll with this being an odd duplicate.

I’m not going to post all the prior links here, as I’m setting up another post that will have EVERYTHING on it, including the original one shot ‘Smoke and Blood.’

I can’t even remember if this was edited. Regardless, enjoy this random end chapter XD

It had been the oddest thing when you left NateMare licking his wounds.

You’d gone to the driveway and found a taxi waiting for you. The driver said the fare had been taken care of and he was to take you wherever you wanted. When you asked him who had covered the tab, he said a well spoken gentleman had done so. 

Seeing your disheveled appearance in pajamas, the taxi driver became curious as to why you were there. 

You went with an elaborate story. It was your birthday, and your asshole brother had kidnapped you and brought you here for a spooky adventure. You’d gotten fed up with his childish antics and had decided to leave. You added that it was likely your brother’s friend that had paid the taxi driver.

When you got home, you took a long, luxurious, hot shower and collapsed into bed. Your exhaustion was deeper than you’d thought, leading you to sleeping for a straight 12 hours.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4 months later…

It had taken him a month, but Mercer had kept his word. He’d found each of his victims that had been put into a coma, and brought them out of it. When questioned about what had happened to send them into the coma, they all had the same story. They’d been out at night, and they came across a man looking for directions. After they sent him on his way, they’d become dizzy and passed out.

Authorities believed that the victims had been distracted by the man asking for directions, then jumped by a second person that knocked them out and then drained them for blood. Reddit was running rampant with theories about a team collecting blood for the black market.

You supposed it was better than them getting freaked out about a rampaging vampire. The last thing the city needed were civilians taking up guns, pitch forks, torches, and stakes to go after people that were innocent.

In the following months, you remained on alert. NateMare’s promise of retribution had left a fairly strong impression. Armed with the knowledge of something to use against him, you’d set up a collection of weapons throughout the apartment.

In the kitchen, you had a bucket of blessed water by the sink. In the living room, you had a Super Soaker loaded with the stuff and in your bedroom, you had a spray bottle at the ready. You knew it would annoy and delay him at best, but at least it was better than just standing around and letting him curse you again.

You were so intent on watching for hints of a smoke cloud, you didn’t think to watch for any bats.

Which was how Mercer caught you off guard.

You’d spent the day out with one of your friends, and had lost track of time. It was dark when you made the walk home. The night was overcast and the wind was much colder as winter was settling in.

Despite your thick jacket, you still felt the chill. Your hands were stuffed into your pockets and your shoulders were hunched up to your ears. Your attention darted between the people walking towards you on the sidewalk and the people that were walking parallel to you across the street. Leaving no room to focus on your surroundings behind you.

An arm went around your shoulders, pulling you in against a tall frame. Startled you made a noise that was barely a word and some kind of squeak.

A familiar voice chuckled, making the hair on the back of your neck stand on end. You didn’t dare look up, not wanting to get caught by his eyes. 

“What are you doing here Mercer?”

Mercer’s arm squeezed a little tighter, guiding you forward to keep walking.

He was greatly enjoying himself. You could tell from his voice as he replied, “Well hello to you too. Can’t a friend just come around for a visit now and then?”

“We’re not friends.”

“Oh, you wound me.” He lamented, without an ounce of actual dismay.

“Did you come here to get some payback for soaking you?” It was the first thing that came to mind, and you were kicking yourself for not bringing your tiny spray bottle with you when leaving earlier.

You caught sight of Mercer’s hand as he waved that thought off, “Not at all. I’ve gotten over that little trifle. As I said, I’m just here on a friendly visit.”

“At what point between you and NateMare trying to kill each other, did you and I become friends?” You could see your apartment building up ahead, and at this point, you were just utterly perplexed as to what was happening with Mercer right now.

He ignored your question, “I had some time to think while I went from hospital to hospital, and I’ve come up with a fun idea. One that I’m sure you’ll see the benefits of.”

You knew it was stupid, you could hear yourself calling it stupid, but when you both stopped in front of your building, you looked up. 

The bugger was genuinely amused, smiling brightly and in all innocence. There was no glow to his eyes and you didn’t feel any part of you go numb. He was playing nice. For now.

You shrugged off his arm and moved around to stand in front of him, “And what idea is this?” 

“Well, as we’re both aware, my dear, baby brother is all in a huff about you letting me go. The set of lungs on that boy, I swear. My ears were throbbing for an hour after his hollering.”

You winced, but you weren’t surprised Mercer had caught that.

“I was thinking to myself about how much trouble you and he were, going around and messing about in my handiwork. Good job on digging up the family history by the way. Anyways, I thought I should probably keep tabs on my brother, make sure he doesn’t come barging in on me at some point unexpectedly. The only problem is that I’m terrible at tracking idiots.”

You shuffled on the spot, getting colder by the minute. Mercer was clearly intent on dragging this out, and you doubted he’d just let you walk away. But you had no intention of inviting him inside.

“So I came to the only logical conclusion: You! I knew he was bound to come knocking on your door at some point and figured I’d keep watch. I tell you, watching a mortal for a month is boring. Which is why we’re having this chat. Much more engaging than just hovering about bored out of my mind.”

Your blood pressure rose at his declaration of stalking you for the past month. You thought you’d felt eyes on you, and it made you twice as jumpy. Knowing it was this nuisance didn’t make you feel any easier.

Processing everything he was saying all together, you just about threw your hands up.

It was the same damned position you’d been in 5 months before, only now it was reversed!

“Clearly you two are related.” You grouched stomping your feet. The cold was seeping through your boots and socks, making your feet ache.

“I am not helping you find NateMare. You are not hanging around here to wait for him to show up! And I’m not getting involved with either of you again!” You didn’t care if the neighbors heard, for all they’d understand, it sounded like a romantic issue.

You spun on your heel and stomped up to your apartment door.

Just as you put the key into the lock, a decent sized bat flew around you and clung onto your chest. You looked back over your shoulder and saw no sign of Mercer. Glaring down at the bat, you hissed, “You are not coming inside, let go and go away.”

The bat merely wiggled its ears, and much to your chagrin, he nuzzled against your coat. Even worse, it was adorable.

You heard people, more tenants that belonged to your building, coming up behind you. 

Suppressing a frustrated scream you unlocked the door, and kept your body turned away from the approaching people.

You wrapped your arms around yourself, concealing Mercer as best you could, and made a beeline for the staircase.

Huffing up the stairs you swore at him, “You’re in so much trouble. I have a bucket filled with holy water in my kitchen and it has your name all over it buddy.”

The impudent bastard gave a tiny squeak. One that conveyed no distress in the slightest.

A glance down and there was no mistaking a smug smile, even on a bat.

You didn’t stop until you were inside your apartment, at which time you were breathless and sweaty under your coat.

“You make one damn comment about me being out of shape, and I will seriously drown you.”

“I’d very much like to see you try.”

You’d been locking your door, putting your back to the living room.

It hadn’t been Mercer that had replied.

Stiffly, you hit the light switch next to the door frame and peeked over your shoulder.

NateMare lounged back on your couch. His body was relaxed, but his expression was one that read murder.

The sound of dripping drew your eye to the kitchen. Your bucket of holy water was on the floor, along with a puddle of water and some that was dripping off the sink's cabinet doors. 

“NateMare-”

“Shut it.” 

He got to his feet and stalked towards you, “You should consider yourself very lucky. Had I gone after you that same day, I would have happily ripped your esophagus out of your throat.”

You swallowed thickly.

“But I took some time to calm down, recover, and think about it. I changed my mind.”

He stepped closer, leaving two steps of distance between you, “I’ve come to realize that I enjoy having a minion doing my bidding. Unlike some other… people… I could name, I don’t have a host popping out brothers every damn holiday. Plus, you’re already semi-trained.”

He smirked and held up a hand. Smoke gathered in his palm, and formed a thick section of chains.

“Hell. To. The. No.” 

You’d done this song and dance and you were not doing it again.

Turning to face him, you pried Mercer from your chest and shoved him into NateMare, “Here, talk to your brother. Take it outside!” 

Stunned, NateMare had dropped the smoke chain and grabbed Mercer on reflex. 

Unprepared, Mercer didn’t have a chance to resist being shoved into NateMare’s hands.

The two stayed frozen and dumbstruck to the spot while you threw off your coat and went to get your mop and bucket.

There was another second of silence until you heard, “WHAT THE FUCK?!”

There was enraged squeaking, a bit of scuffling, the sound of a grunt, and then silence.

When you returned to the kitchen, you found the two were gone, and your balcony door wide open.

You were in the clear. For now.