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#and that’s IF and only IF i’m able to even fall in love in the first place
geotjwrs · 2 days
Note
Hey is it possible if you could do Jenna x male reader based off the song Dark Red by Steve Lacy? Thank you
only you babe
Pairings ; Jenna Ortega x Male!Reader
Warning/s ; none
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The faint sound of music hummed in the background, barely loud enough to be heard over the quiet tension in the room. Y/N sat on the edge of the bed, his phone clutched in his hand, his eyes staring blankly at the screen. It had been an hour since Jenna had texted, and her silence felt louder than anything else in his life right now.
"I think you know that I miss you…"
The lyrics echoed in his mind, but all he could focus on was the gnawing feeling in his gut—the one that told him something was wrong. He hadn’t heard from her since their last conversation, and now every passing second felt like a countdown to something he didn’t want to face.
He stood up, pacing the small apartment. He’d always had this fear, deep down, that Jenna might slip away. That one day, she would realize she didn’t need him. And lately, that fear had started to feel more real. The way she’d been distant, the way her messages came less frequently, it all pointed to something he didn’t want to acknowledge.
"Something bad is ’bout to happen to me…"
The words from the song buzzed in his head, like a warning he couldn’t ignore.
Y/N ran a hand through his hair, feeling the weight of everything bearing down on him. He knew he should call her, talk to her, ask her what was really going on. But every time he thought about it, that voice in the back of his mind whispered, What if she’s done? What if you push her away?
Just as he was about to give in to the anxiety, his phone buzzed. A message.
Jenna: “Can we talk?”
Y/N’s heart dropped. He stared at the screen, his hands shaking slightly. Those words—“Can we talk?”—were never a good sign. He could feel the blood draining from his face, and the room suddenly felt too small, too hot.
He sat down again, his mind racing with every possible worst-case scenario. She was leaving, wasn’t she? She had found someone else, or maybe she had finally gotten tired of him. Y/N’s thoughts spiraled out of control, and before he could stop himself, he typed out a response.
Y/N: “Is everything okay?”
The seconds stretched into minutes, and still no response. Y/N stood up again, pacing even faster now, his palms sweaty as he waited for her reply. He couldn’t breathe. His mind was clouded with every possible thing that could go wrong.
"I think I’m losin’ it…"
He looked around the apartment, his gaze falling on the little things that reminded him of her. The jacket she’d left hanging on the back of his chair. The coffee mug she always used. The picture of the two of them sitting on the shelf, smiling like nothing in the world could ever come between them.
But now, Y/N wasn’t so sure. He hadn’t been sure for a while, and it scared him more than anything.
Finally, his phone buzzed again. He snatched it up, his heart pounding in his chest as he read her message.
Jenna: “Yeah, but… I just feel like things have been off between us lately.”
Y/N closed his eyes, feeling a lump form in his throat. He had known this was coming. He had felt it in every silence, in every missed call, in every time she had looked at him like she was seeing someone else. But hearing her say it, seeing it in black and white on his screen, made it real.
Y/N: “I know… I’ve felt it too.”
He didn’t know what else to say. He wanted to tell her how scared he was, how much he loved her, how the thought of losing her made him feel like he was drowning. But he didn’t. Instead, he just waited, feeling like the walls were closing in around him.
An hour later, Jenna showed up at his door. She stood there, her arms crossed, looking at him with those dark eyes that had always been able to read him like a book. There was something different in them tonight, though—something he couldn’t quite place.
Y/N stepped aside, letting her in. They hadn’t talked in person for a couple of days, and the air between them felt heavy, loaded with everything left unsaid.
“Hey,” she said quietly, her voice almost fragile as she walked past him.
“Hey,” Y/N replied, his throat tight. He closed the door behind her, leaning against it for a second before following her into the living room.
They sat on opposite ends of the couch, the space between them feeling much bigger than it had ever felt before. Y/N fidgeted with his hands, trying to come up with something to say, but his mind was blank.
Jenna looked at him, her expression soft but serious. “Y/N… I don’t know what’s been going on with us lately. But I can’t shake this feeling that something’s wrong.”
Y/N swallowed hard, his heart hammering in his chest. He wanted to tell her everything—about how terrified he was of losing her, how he’d been feeling this weight of uncertainty pressing down on him for weeks. But instead, he just nodded, afraid that if he said the wrong thing, he’d make everything worse.
“Me too,” he finally managed to say. “I’ve felt it too.”
Jenna sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I don’t want us to fall apart, Y/N. But lately, it feels like we’re not even on the same page anymore. Like we’re both just waiting for something bad to happen.”
Y/N’s heart sank. That was exactly how he had been feeling. Like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop, for her to say she was done with him. He hadn’t realized she was feeling the same way.
“I don’t want to lose you,” Y/N said, his voice cracking slightly. He hated how vulnerable he sounded, but he couldn’t help it. This was Jenna, the girl he had loved for longer than he could remember, and the thought of her walking out of his life was unbearable.
Jenna’s eyes softened at his words. She reached out, taking his hand in hers. “I don’t want to lose you either. But we need to figure this out, Y/N. We can’t keep going on like this, pretending everything’s fine when it’s not.”
Y/N nodded, squeezing her hand tightly. “I know. I just… I’ve been so scared, Jenna. Scared that you’d wake up one day and realize you didn’t want this anymore. That you didn’t want me.”
Jenna’s expression softened even more, and she moved closer to him, her hand still gripping his. “Y/N… that’s not it. I love you. I always have. But we can’t keep letting fear control us. We need to talk to each other, not shut down every time things get hard.”
Y/N closed his eyes, feeling a wave of relief wash over him. She wasn’t leaving. She didn’t want to leave. But the fear, the doubt, had been eating him alive for weeks, and now that it was out in the open, he realized just how much it had been affecting them.
“I’m sorry,” Y/N whispered, his voice barely audible. “I’ve been so wrapped up in my own head that I didn’t realize I was pushing you away.”
Jenna shook her head, her thumb gently brushing over the back of his hand. “We’ve both been doing it. But it doesn’t have to be like this. We can fix this, Y/N. We just need to be honest with each other.”
Y/N nodded, finally meeting her gaze. “I want that. I want us to be okay.”
Jenna smiled softly, leaning in to press her forehead against his. “We will be. But we have to stop letting fear get in the way.”
They sat there like that for a while, their foreheads touching, the weight of their unspoken fears slowly lifting. The tension between them wasn’t gone, but it felt lighter now, more manageable.
As the night wore on, Y/N realized that the dark cloud that had been hanging over them for so long was starting to fade. There were still things they needed to work through, still conversations they needed to have, but for the first time in weeks, Y/N felt like maybe they could make it through this.
And as he held Jenna close, he knew one thing for sure—he wasn’t going to let fear take her away from him. Not again.
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hiraethwa · 3 days
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to be loved is to be known
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zero; i was made for loving you // from a distance
<the collection — to be loved is to be known>
pairing. kageyama x reader
cw. angst to fluff, timeskip, setter!reader, one-sided pining, blasphemy, soon to be married and then divorced!reader, not very canon timeline compliant if you squint
wc. ~600
lucky is to have you. lucky is something i am not.
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kageyama tobio thinks he must be born cursed. that or the gods just enjoy playing cruel pranks on him to see him flounder about and suffer as he flits around in the palm of their hands. 
because how else would one explain missing the person who he’s been waiting for by years, not just once, but twice? he swallows the feeling that is bubbling up in his throat as he watches you give him a thumbs up on the sidelines, eyes catching onto the glint of gold on your finger. 
yeah, he decides bitterly, they must be toying me for their own amusement. 
he remembers the first time he met you as clear as day, introduced by kuroo tetsuro—the gods-favored one who had been blessed not only to have the fortune of meeting you first, but also managing to claim your heart as his in the process. 
he had seen you in passing a handful of times, heard of your name on the same stage as him, your names endlessly intertwined together. as if you were two sides of the same coin despite never having properly interacted before. 
if he was being honest, he had been mildly irked at the constant comparison. the articles, doing their analysis of “genius setter kageyama tobio vs strategic setter oumae y/n”, goes on and on about your technical prowess (which is almost on par with him) and your strategic plays (purportedly better than his own), all concluding with a question—will you surpass him as japan’s best setter? 
not to mention, you are the people’s darling, all smiles and sunshine, even-tempered and ever so delightful to be around, unlike the storm that accompanies him whenever he is off court. 
though when kuroo-san personally requested for his help, he found his own curiosity piqued. considering that he is indebted to kuroo-san for all that he had done to help karasuno grow into their wings years ago, how could he reject his request?
besides, kageyama had his own questions for you. he found himself looking up replays of your games on youtube after going to one of your matches with hinata and his younger sister, mesmerized by your skills as a setter. despite the minor annoyance he had with the media, he quickly came to agree with their shallow assessment.
“oumae y/n, nice to meet you.” your words were polite, that dazzling smile that wins everyone over to your side making its first appearance. “i’ve been dying to meet you since i saw you play a couple of years ago. your precise sets are a work of art, and i’m sure you’ve been told this, your serves are godly.”
somehow you almost, almost remind him of oikawa tooru, if not for the sincerity behind your words, the stark contrast to oikawa-san’s habitual disingenuous tone. 
despite himself, a faint smile made its way onto his face—one of many, many more that you will pull out of him in time. 
“i’ve heard some things, but godly, that’s a first.” and you had fucking beamed at him like a bright sunny day, like a fan meeting their idol for the first time. he supposes that it was exactly that, if you had been following him for a while. 
you went on to pepper him with questions about his serve, showing him how you do it, and asking him to correct your form.
he wishes he could chalk it all up to falling in love at first sight. at least then he would have been able to blame it all on illogical emotions that do not have a basis for why he fell for someone who is taken. 
but the gods do not favor kageyama tobio, for they curse him so, bestowing the fate of koi no yokan upon him—what was supposed to be a magical feeling of knowing that you are meant to fall for them inevitably, with a cruel twist just for him. 
and he knows, fuck the gods, he knows more than senses the light flutter of his dormant heart awakening to you. 
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taglist. @hatsukeii @daisy-room @soulfullystarry @kitsune-kita @bakery-anon (open! ask for taglist)
a/n. might have lost my mind writing lovesick tobio but it was worth it <3
awaiting updates? browse the library while waiting
if you liked this, please consider leaving a like, comment, rb or ask <3 (perhaps i enjoy hearing about how i break hearts a little too much)
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soukokumychildren · 2 days
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Chuuya: It kinda sucks, y’know?
Dazai: ?
Chuuya: That in some universes, I don’t tell you that I love you, or you don’t tell me that you love me?
Dazai: What’s this about?
Chuuya: Well, since we have such convenient access to the internet and to a hub of different universes, I just think it kinda super sucks when we don’t fall in love.
Dazai: Only super sucks?
Chuuya: I’m holding back a mix of emotions but I see this one rather cute universe where I’m so terribly oblivious, even everyday people aren’t able to convince me of shit. *Shrugs*
Dazai: You aren’t that oblivious…
Chuuya: …
Dazai: ….
Chuuya: You tryin’ to start something, Mackerel?
Dazai: Nyyeeeoooooh—
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masonmontz · 13 hours
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hellooo everyone :) hope you like it
REMEMBER: english is not my first language
angst word count: 9,5k
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“Y/N has a new boyfriend” Declan spoke and silence was the response he received. Mason felt his heart skip a beat and then fall to the floor, causing Mason to get a lump in his throat.
He just stared at Dec, trying to swallow the food he had put in his mouth before hearing the news. It took a lot of effort to swallow.
“I’m not hungry anymore” Mason pushed the plate away, feeling the strange sensation in his stomach, the same feeling that kept him awake at night. 
Lauren looked at him with pity and Mason felt like an idiot. Declan cleared his throat, realizing he shouldn't have told Mason the news, but what could he do if you were friends with him and Lauren too?
“Sorry mate, I shouldn't have said that” Declan apologized to Mason, but he shrugged it off, not placing the blame on Declan. 
“Who is the guy?” Reece asked, because after all he is also your friend. The restaurant seemed silent with the awkward atmosphere that remained at the table and Mason just stared at the plate he barely touched. 
“David. They work together” Lauren spoke and Mason looked at her, but Lauren was already looking at him waiting for Mason's reaction. Mason looked down and felt everyone's eyes on him, Dec, Lauren, Ben, Reece, Aimee and Henry. 
Mason felt like he was a bomb about to explode and everyone wanted to see the moment it happened.
“Sorry guys, I’m going home” Mason got up quickly and without looking at his friends, ‘cause he already knew that everyone noticed how affected he was by the news that you were dating, but he didn't want to see the pity in everyone's eyes. “Declan, pay my portion and I'll give you the money later.”
Mason left the restaurant quickly, but he heard Aimee's heels behind him and he sighed, knowing he wouldn't be able to outrun the stubborn woman running after him. 
“Mase, wait-” she called him, and Mason only stopped walking when he felt the cold air on his face, needing some fresh air. “Hey.”
“I can't take this anymore, Aimee. I can't” Mason's voice was cracked, and the state he had been in for almost two months was deplorable. “She left me in the shit.”
Mason knows that Aimee is your best friend and he knows that you two talk daily, but he needs to talk to someone ‘cause Mason feels like at any moment he will reach his breaking point. 
His eyes filled with tears, and he was looking out into the cold night but Aimee could see his eyes were wet. 
“I'm so sorry, Mase. I tried to talk to her about it but she won't let me” Aimee hugged Mason from the side, putting her arms around his shoulders, even though he was taller than her. 
Mason looked at her devastated, and Aimee felt her own heart ache at the sadness on Mason's face.
“I really can't take this anymore, it's too much for me, Aim” Mason sighed and brought his hands to his face, because he still felt his heart tighten in his chest, he wasn't hungry and he felt like he could vomit ‘cause of the emotions that were going through him.
He missed you.
He was sad.
He was alone.
And you left.
“You know you can talk to all of us, right? We're your friends, Mason, and you can run to us whenever you need to. You don't have to deal with all of this alone” Aimee held his hand and Mason nodded, but he knew Aimee had been busy lately because she was planning her own wedding with Henry, but she was so nice that she offered to be Mason's support since you left.
“I know, thank you” Mason tried to smile, but he knew he gave the saddest smile anyone had ever seen. “Tell them I apologized for ditching dinner.”
“Don’t worry, but please, take care of yourself.”
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
You and Mason have been friends for years, you met in school and you had some friends in common. Everyone knew that Mason had been in love with you since you were a teenager, but you were never able to see him as anything more than a great friend. Not since the night you kissed for the first time.
You also knew that Mason was in love with you, but sometimes things don't happen the way we want, and even though he always treated you much better than your boyfriends, there was nothing you could do if you didn't like him back.
The night you were celebrating your twenty-fourth birthday in a place where all your friends were was when Mason decided to make the first move. 
He asked to deliver the gift he bought for you away from the others, and he gave you the most beautiful bracelet you had ever seen, it was gold and had your initial as a pendant, but it also had shells and stars, books, teacups and everything you liked the most. It was so delicate that you were moved when you realized how much Mason knew you.
When you hugged and thanked him that's when Mason kissed you, and that's okay, at that moment you didn't care and kissed him back. It was terrible to realize that that was the best kiss you had ever had, no one had ever kissed you so intensely, with so much love and passion.
Your mistake was going home with him after the party, ‘cause Mason was all over you the whole night and everyone could tell something was up, and you were also wrong for kissing him back every time, maybe giving Mason hope that it all meant something. 
At first it didn't really mean anything, but after weeks of having sex with him, even you who had an impenetrable heart found yourself attracted and in love with him. Mason made you smile, Mason treated you well and always put you first, and when you realized that, you also realized that you never put him first. And you never would.
You were working so hard at work to get the job the company was offering in Australia that it wouldn't be fair to him ‘cause you wouldn't be able to give him what he deserves if you had to move. 
Mason didn't accept staying away, so he said he didn't care if you didn't give a name to what you had. You weren't just friends but you weren't dating either, you knew his parents but not as his girlfriend, and Mason accompanied you everywhere just as... someone you were sleeping with. That was it.
For months it was like this. It was your house that Mason went to after games, it was you he called when he lost a game and wanted comfort from someone he loved or when they won and he wanted to celebrate with someone. You, always you, no one else. 
Mason loved you so much that he felt his heart jump with joy every time someone said your name or when he saw a message from you on his phone. Everyone thought you were his girlfriend, but Mason was too embarrassed to tell you that you weren't his girlfriend. Even he couldn't understand what was going on between you, so imagine telling others.
But your time was limited, and everyone knew it.
Almost a year later you received the proposal you had dreamed of for so long, and you were so happy that the idea of ​​leaving England wasn't scary at all, it was wonderful. You only told your parents at first, then Aimee ten days before you left. 
You didn't know how to tell him that you were moving, especially since you knew Mason wouldn't handle it very well. He was injured and had some problems with his Chelsea contract, and Mason was looking to you every day for comfort to feel good. 
He found out before you could tell him, and only because you left the plane ticket where he could see it, but it wasn't intentional, you just forgot to put it away. You still remember his face when Mason turned to you with the ticket in his hand, and you felt your heart skip a beat as you realized the argument was closer than you thought.
“Why do you have a plane ticket to Australia?” He asked quietly, but deep down you knew Mason knew what it meant. 
You couldn't lie to him anymore and you had to be honest, no matter how much it hurt.
“Cause I’m moving to Australia” Mason looked at the paper in his hand once more, probably wanting to see the date. The day you would leave.
“In ten days?” You just nodded, sighing when you saw Mason’s lip tremble. He put the paper back where he had found it and stared at you. “And when were you going to tell me? When you were getting on the plane?”
“I was planning on telling you right away, you weren't supposed to find out like this.” 
“It wouldn't hurt any less if you had told me sooner. How long have you known you were moving?”
“Almost two months” Mason agreed and you could see a piece of his heart break, then another and another. “C’mon, let's talk about it.”
You held out your hand to Mason, but he didn't take it and just stood there staring at you. You walked over to him and grabbed his hand, pulling him onto the couch with you. Mason sat on the couch and you knelt on the floor in front of him, resting your arms on his knee as he stared at you in so much pain that you felt your heart clench.
“Mase, you know how much I wanted this job, I worked really hard for this transfer and I finally got it” you explained to him, gently stroking his leg. “Don't be mad at me, but we knew I would have to move if I got the job.”
“It's not that I didn't want you to get the job, I just didn't think it would happen, it seemed so far away and you didn't tell me. I'm the last to know” he spoke, staring at his hands without looking at you, but you brought your hand to his chin and made him look at you. “And we both know that our relationship isn't going to work out.”
“We just don't date because you don't want to, if it were up to me you know you'd be my girlfriend” he spoke softly and you sighed, knowing it was true.
“Mase, I know you have a crush on me and yeah, I have a crush on you but-”
“Y/N, I don’t have a crush on you, I’m in love with you. I love you” he said and you felt your heart race ‘cause you never let Mason confess his feelings to you, and you knew that what he felt was much bigger. “How can you say that I have a crush on you when I've been doing everything for you for almost a year? It's not fair to me.”
“Well, I never asked you to do anything for me. Mason, I'm sorry, but I also never promised to offer you more than I already do” you got up from the floor and sat next to him, but Mason continued to stare at the floor in front of him.
“I love you and I've loved you since before I kissed you for the first time, how funny is that? And even after months of sleeping next to you, having sex, wanting to be good enough for you, you don't feel anything for me? How can you be so cold?” 
“I never wanted this relationship to go ahead ‘cause I always hoped to go to Australia. You've got Chelsea, you've got enough women to last you the rest of your life, live it, Mason.” 
“I don't want any other woman, it's always been you, Y/N. It's always been you, and you acting like it's nothing is what hurts me the most” a tear ran down Mason's face, but he quickly wiped it away, which was in vain because he couldn't stop other tears from falling, and before you knew it Mason was crying, sobbing. “Why are you doing this to me?”
You didn't know how to respond, so you stayed silent as you watched Mason cry. And the scene was sad, because there was nothing you could do to comfort him, what was done was done.
“I will wait for you to come back” he whispered, and then turned his face to look at you.
“Mason, that’s the point. I don’t know if I will ever come back. What if I like Australia? Or if I find someone there?” At that moment Mason felt like he was going to have a panic attack, and he was sure he was running out of air to breathe. “Go and live your life and forget about me, that's what I'm asking.”
“I can’t do this, Y/N. I can’t. I love you and I have loved you since I was eighteen, how can you ask me to forget you? How can you ask me to forget you after sharing so much of myself with you?” He stood up, putting his hands in his hair and breathing quickly.
“Don't forget me then, but I won't promise you that I'll come back.” 
“How can you pretend you don't feel anything for me? You can confess it, no one has to know.” 
“Because I don’t love you back.” You said it, and even Mason knew it was a lie, but it still hurt.
“You do. Don’t lie. If you don’t love me you shouldn’t act like you do” he said between sobs. “Don’t do this to me, please. I’m begging you to stay.”
“I already made my decision long ago, you're not going to change that Mason” you spoke with a lump in your throat, wanting to cry but refusing to cry in front of him and making things more difficult. 
“Just say you love me back” he begged, and Mason looked like the saddest man you'd ever seen.
“I'm not going to say anything ‘cause things can't get any harder than they already are. Everything it's over between us, Mason. In ten days I'm going to Australia and you're going to stay here and conquer the world. Without me.”
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
Mason sighed as he entered his quiet London flat. It was strange to return to a place that had once been the place he considered home, but now London was no longer his home, and neither was Manchester. 
Because the place Mason considered home for a long time was in Australia, and now it was someone else's home.
Mason was going crazy and he was sure of it, but he swears that when he threw himself on the bed where you used to lie he smelled your perfume. That's where Mason broke down.
“Why did you do this to me, Y/N?” He spoke to himself, closing his eyes and feeling the tears run down his neck ‘cause he was lying down. A sob escaped his lips, it was the first time he had cried since the last time he saw you and Mason realized that he didn't know how to deal with the things that were happening in his life.
His contract with Chelsea ended and Mason joined Manchester United, but he was far from a happy man. Even with so many insults and threats, he didn't cry once, and every smile he gave when he went to Manchester United was fake. 
Mason was just surviving and doing whatever he was told to do, ‘cause all his thoughts were about you, from the moment he woke up in the morning until the time he lay down to sleep. 
And Mason even had the false idea that you were also thinking about him, but no, because now you have a boyfriend. Mason feels his own body heat up with anger when he thinks about another man touching you, kissing you in the same way he did. 
Mason's phone vibrated in his pocket, and he sighed because he didn't want to look at the message. And it was something that had become a habit for him, if no message was from you, why would he be excited to receive one?
But he still picked up his phone to check and was not at all surprised to see Aimee's message.
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Mason threw his phone on the mattress, looking around the room and seeing that you hadn't left anything there, not even a sock, and it was as if you had never entered that room. 
The worst part is that every time Mason saw Aimee he remembered that you two were always together too, because you were like twins, you were always together and did the same things. He also heard that you and Aimee had a falling out over your decision to move to Australia, but had talked things through before you traveled.
Y/N has a new boyfriend. Declan's voice crossed Mason's mind again, and that phrase had been haunting him ever since he heard it. 
Mason knew you loved him, he could see it in the touches, the looks and even the secrets you shared with each other. You were too stubborn to tell him that, and Mason knew it wasn't fair to ask you to give up on a dream, but he wished he could have heard at least once the three words he always wanted to hear from your lips. Just once was enough, because then Mason would know that all those months together had been worth it.
Mason can't understand how you don't miss him, someone you shared everything with until months ago and now he's a stranger. How can you not miss him when Mason has been missing you even when he's sleeping? Don't you miss him when you're taking a shower with your new boyfriend? The thought makes Mason want to vomit.
But now you have a boyfriend and it's him you say I love you to, it's him who asks to hold your hand, it's him who admires you sleeping.
Mason didn't know it was possible to feel so jealous of someone while having a broken heart. It's been five months since you left and Mason feels like his heart hurts more every day, and he doesn't know how long it will take for him to heal.
He needs to forget you ‘cause you've definitely already forgotten him, but he doesn't know how. Mason discovered that he needs you the same way he needs air to breathe. 
But you moved on and Mason moved on with a broken heart, in a helpless state, and even though he'll never open up to anyone the way he did to you, at some point that pain has to pass.
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹ 3 months later ✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“No, I didn't forget the dress, mum” you said in a phone call walking through the London airport while talking to your mother. She was traveling to Ireland and wouldn't be back until next week, so you were alone for the next few days. “Yes, I will wait for you to come back, you know I will stay in England for twenty days. I know. Yes, I will. Bye, I love you too.”
You almost groaned at the amount of people walking around London airport, and it would be much harder to find Aimee than you thought. After eight months, you are back in the rainy, cold weather of England, and you missed it so much that you felt like you could cry at any moment.
Aimee and Henry's wedding is in three days, and that's why you've brought yourself back to England, ‘cause you wouldn't miss it for anything. 
Australia is a great place to live and you love your job there, you've made some friends but... Australia is not London. 
“Y/N!” You heard Aimee's voice before you even saw her, and your eyes filled with tears when you saw her waiting for you at the airport exit. It was like a scene from a movie, but you ran and hugged each other while you cried.
“How can you go and live far away from me? My God, I hate you, I was dying missing you” she cried, and you didn't let go of each other for long minutes. “Did you miss me?”
“Of course I missed you” you wiped the tear from your tear-streaked face, and it was impossible to stop smiling when you knew you were home again. “You look so beautiful. How is everyone? Are you looking forward to the wedding?”
“I can't believe I'm without my best friend when I get married, let's start there. And yes, everyone is fine, everyone is excited to see you again” you and Aimee walked towards the airport exit carrying your bags, and the reception you received was heavy rain at the exit. Nothing better than being in England.
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“I heard you have a boyfriend in Australia” Henry said with a smirk on his mouth, and you blushed. “Why didn't you bring him?”
“First, we’re just having sex, he’s not my boyfriend. Second, why would I bring him to your wedding?” You put a piece of pizza in your mouth, wanting to ignore what they were talking about. 
Josh wasn't really your boyfriend, you worked together and enjoyed being together, but he was in love with someone else and you knew it, so you never wanted anything from him. Your heart was only half in Australia too.
“And what was that photo you posted on Instagram months ago?” Aimee asked and you looked angry at her. They were nosy and wouldn't change.
“He mentioned me in his stories, what could I do?” You shrugged it off, because it really wasn't that big of a deal.
“Everyone saw it” Henry said, and he emphasized when he said “everyone”. 
You looked at him and thought of Mason. In fact, Mason hadn't left your thoughts for months, he was what you thought about twenty-four hours a day. You looked at the table without looking at the two of them, and even though you didn't want to show that you cared about Mason, they were able to read your face like a book.
“You know he's coming to the wedding, right?” Aimee asked and you agreed. “It's the international break and he has a few days off, he'll be in London during those days.” 
“I know.” 
You were nervous about seeing Mason again after so long, even more because you left without saying what he wanted so bad to hear. 
It wasn't fair to confess your feelings when you were moving to the other side of the world. It wasn't fair to him and it wasn't fair to you, that's why even after so many months with him and knowing how much he loved you, you refused to tell him how you felt about him, because you knew it would be worse.
Deep down you know that if he brings someone else it will hurt, but you can't feel hurt when it was your decision. Maybe, just maybe, if Mason is over you it means that going back to Australia and moving on is the best option, even if you feel incomplete. 
God, it's so hard to love someone and want to do the right thing.
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“Should I wear red lingerie?” Aimee asked and you looked at her with raised eyebrows. “Don’t look at me like that.”
“You’re not supposed to have sex until the wedding” you looked at yourself in the mirror, admiring your bare legs in the long-sleeved black dress. “Do I look hotter or is it just me?”
“You are hot, baby.” 
You and Aimee are getting ready for her bachelorette party at a club in London, one you used to go to as teenagers. She's invited her bridesmaids and other friends, and it's sure to be an amazing night.
You can't believe your best friend is getting married. 
The club was full of people, the music was lively and soon you found the place reserved for Aimee's bachelor party, because there were balloons, glitter, feathers and lots of pink and white.
In Australia you made some friends but it was different being with the people you grew up with, who know you inside out and like the same things as you. 
Aimee cried every fifteen minutes when she remembered that she was going to marry the love of her life in two days, and in the end someone always cried with emotion with her. She and Henry loved each other since they met, it was incredible to see how well they worked together, how much Henry treated her well or did everything for her.
You always wanted someone like that by your side.
As you watched Aimee talk to Kylie, probably about the wedding or about Henry, you remembered that you had a person like that for you.
And you ruined everything. 
You felt your heart skip a beat when you thought about Mason again, and even after the drinks you had already had, you felt sad when you remembered that besides pushing Mason out of your life, you were also alone.
A few months ago, before you moved, you asked your mother how she knew that Richard, your stepfather, was the right person for her. She and your father had a bad marriage and she was not happy, and you and your sister suffered the consequences of that failed marriage, but with Richard she was glowing with happiness.
“It needs to be someone special.” 
Someone who doesn't argue with you, someone who celebrates the little things, someone who makes you happy most days. Happiness isn't eternal but it's moments, and if someone makes you sad more than happy, there's something wrong.
You had someone special, and you realized it when you stared into that empty, silent apartment in Australia, far from everyone you love. 
You were lost in thought, but you came back to reality when Aimee screamed and pointed behind you, and then you heard male laughter.
A laugh that you could recognize anywhere.
You smelled Mason's scent before you even saw him and your legs went weak as you realized what was happening. 
“Hi boys” Aime squealed, cheering as Henry walked up to her and kissed her in front of everyone, causing the girls to clap. You’d have smiled if you weren't feeling Mason's gaze on your back.
It was ridiculous that you were afraid to turn around and look at him, but you were scared to death. You turned so you could look at his face, even if it was the only time that night. You couldn't help yourself ‘cause you needed to look at him, so you turned around.
You met his eyes before you could react, because you knew he was watching you, his gaze heavy on your back. His face was serious now, and the worst thing was that you noticed that his eyes no longer had that sparkle they had when you were together.
You were the one most to blame for this.
You couldn't look away from him but you couldn't say anything either, you were just taken out of your thoughts and had to look to your side when Declan shouted when he saw you. You smiled at your friend, happy to see him, because Declan was your family too.
“Hello, D” you hugged him, closing your eyes and feeling emotional. You don't know how you managed to go so many months without seeing them. “How are you?”
“I'm fine. And you? Did you realize that England is your place?” Lauren walked over and Declan wrapped his arms around her neck. “This woman has been talking about you every day since you moved in, I couldn't take it anymore.”
“That’s not true” she complained and rolled her eyes smiling, because Lauren was also one of your best friends. “By the way, we missed you, Y/N.”
Mason was standing in the same spot and you finally turned to him after talking to Declan, and you almost rolled your eyes when you saw them all move away purposefully. It was like seeing a ray of sunshine after a storm, and you felt like nothing else mattered when Mason had his eyes on you like you were the only woman in the room.
It was ridiculous to try to explain how handsome Mason looked. He was wearing black pants, a black men's tank top, a white wool coat and Converse. 
“Hello Mason” you said, and even with the loud music he would hear, because it seemed like there were only the two of you there. 
Mason scratched his throat before answering you, he seemed as nervous as you were, and deep down, you were glad for that.
“Hello” he mumbled but you could read his lips. Oh, how you missed his voice.
You took a step towards him, ignoring that everyone was looking at you, and you were lost with the Mason colony around you. 
“You good?” You asked and Mason just nodded, but then Reece appeared hugging Mason by the neck and breaking the bad mood between you. He was drunk and you noticed, he was laughing at nothing and holding onto Mason. You smiled, because you had missed him too. 
“Oh, did you remember you have friends?” You rolled your eyes and hugged him, feeling Mason's gaze on you. “I missed you, Y/N.” 
“I missed you so much, Reece. There is no one like you in Australia.”
“Mason missed you too, but he doesn't tell anyone” Reece whispered in your ear and you smiled, not looking at Mason so he wouldn't realize his friend was talking about him, but before you could do anything, Mason left and went to Declan and Lauren. “He's been a complicated boy these past few months.”
“I fucked up with him and he hates me now” and it was true, Mason probably started to despise you after you were such a bitch to him. 
“He loves you, but he is so stubborn ‘cause you hurt him.”
Mason was now on his back, and God, you just wanted to hug him and feel safe again as you felt his arms around you. 
Mason ignored you perfectly for a long time, you couldn't get close to him and you didn't know how either. Was it fair to want to talk to him and then leave again? Maybe Mason is just protecting his own heart because you already broke his heart once, it's not right to break his heart again after so many months.
Henry said that he had decided to come to the same club as Aimee ‘cause he wanted to have fun with her and the boys, and you smiled at his confession. Aimee knew he was coming and hadn't told you anything, who thought it would be a girls' night. 
“Where's your boyfriend, Y/N?” Declan asked hours later when you were both sitting on the beanbags, the music lower now and you could talk without shouting. 
Before you could answer Mason stood up, saying he was going to get a drink from the bar even though the table was full of drink options. You looked at him disappointed ‘cause you wanted to be able to talk to him or tell him that you don't have a boyfriend, and he preferred to leave than hear you talk about another man.
“Our boy Mason is jealous” Reece laughed and you decided to go after Mason, without answering Declan's question.
It wasn't hard to find Mason, he sat in one of the chairs at the counter and had his back to you, so you quickly sat next to him. He noticed when you sat down next to him but didn't say anything, just continued to stare at the untouched drink in front of him. 
“Running away is not something you usually do” you said and Mason finally looked at you, raising his eyebrows.
“I used to do a lot of things that I don't do anymore” not that you deserve Mason being rude, but it's clear that Mason still resents you. 
“And that's why I know things between us aren't resolved yet” you saw Mason sigh, and you wanted so much to be able to hug him, but if you asked him to he would probably run away from you.
“Yes, everything is resolved. We resolved it when you decided to leave” Mason held the glass and threatened to get up, but you grabbed his arm and stopped him from leaving. “Please let me go, don't make me suffer again.”
“I don't want to make you suffer, Mason, I just want to talk to you for a while” you practically begged him, but Mason was still trying to pull away from you. 
“Talk about what? About how my life went to shit after you left? That I was here suffering while you started a new life in fucking Australia? You wanna know about that to laugh at me because I was an idiot?” 
“Don’t do that, please” you whispered, because Mason had no idea how much you suffered away from him. You never told him, of course he doesn't know.
“I gave my all to you, Y/N, and that's the worst ‘cause I still love you so much that my heart feels like it's going to jump out of my chest” he said looking at you and you felt your own hands tremble, Mason always had that effect on you. “You can't just leave and come back wanting to talk to me like everything is fine, because it's not.”
“Please don't act like it wasn't difficult for me too” You felt your eyes water and Mason shook his head in disbelief.
Because it was really difficult. You spent weeks thinking if you did the right thing, if leaving everything in England was the best option, if ending the best thing that had ever happened to you was the best choice, and there was only one answer in your head. 
“Yeah, I know. By the way, where's your boyfriend? Is that why your life was hard in Australia?” Mason asked and drank all the last drink he had ordered. “I went to hell after you moved out, and while you were there enjoying your new life I stayed here because I was dropped off without notice. Don't feel rejected because I don't want you to fuck me again, you rejected me first.”
Mason turned his back and left the club without saying goodbye, leaving you alone with the guilt and regret consuming you.
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
You took at least five deep breaths before ringing the bell on the white door in front of you. You also don't know how or why, but your fingerprint was still registered at the entrance to the building where Mason has a flat in London, and after convincing Aimee to tell you if he was there, she finally said yes. 
You regretted it the second you rang the doorbell, especially since it was only seven thirty in the morning, but you had been up all night and would go crazy if you didn't go there. You raised your finger to press the doorbell again but heard a grumble coming from the other side of the door, and you hated yourself ‘cause you probably woke Mason up.
He opened the door wearing only underwear and a crumpled face. You swallowed hard.
“Y/n?” He spoke in a hoarse voice, and before he could tell you to leave, you entered the apartment cause you needed to talk to him. “Is there something wrong?”
Mason closed the door and looked at you, waiting for you to answer. You took another deep breath, but it still wasn't enough to make you less nervous.
“It was difficult for me too, it still is” Mason raised his eyebrow. “Don't think that just because I never said what you wanted to hear, I didn't feel anything, I just knew that our time together had an end date and there was nothing to change that.”
“Look, I don’t want to-”
“You’re gonna listen to me, Mason” you stopped Mason from speaking, and then he kept looking at you. “It's not fair for you to say that I didn't suffer, because no one was in Australia with me to know that, you don't know how many nights I cried on the phone with Aimee wanting to give up everything to go back to England and to you.”
“And I don't care if you think I don't care about you, but know that you were one of the best things that ever happened to me and you can't treat me badly like you treated me yesterday, it's not fair to me either” you stopped for two seconds to breathe, and Mason looked at you without saying anything. “You know how much I always wanted this job, Mason, and you can't imagine how much it hurts me to realize that I'm gone and I was much happier here than I am in Australia.”
A tear fell from your face and you wiped it away, Mason brought his hands to his face and sighed, taking a step towards you, but you stopped him from getting closer. 
“I'm not here to ask you for forgiveness, I just needed to say a few things.”
And you were gone as quickly as you arrived, leaving Mason and his own thoughts alone.
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
Mason felt like shit for the rest of the day, mainly ‘cause he knew he treated you badly. The problem is that Mason gave you everything, and when he least expected it, you broke his heart into pieces.
Those were terrible months, Mason was training, he was irritated with everyone and especially on the field, which caused him to be sent off and made the coach discuss with him. Mason spent months without sleeping through the night, got drunk at every party he went to, and even spent weeks without talking to his own family so no one would ask about you.
Aimee and Henry's wedding is tomorrow and Mason would rather be anywhere but there. He can't even imagine what it's going to be like to see you so beautiful and in a relationship with another man who's oceans away, but Mason knows it's going to be very difficult.
“Why do you have such a shitty face?” Declan asked as he took the beer Mason handed him, and Mason had been quiet for minutes while they were watching an old football match that was on the television.
“Y/N came here this morning” Mason spoke softly and threw himself onto the couch, sighing as he remembered the words you spoke to him. “I feel like shit again, bro.”
“You've been feeling like shit for eight months, my friend” Mason rolled his eyes, but he couldn't disagree. You came back and turned over all the feelings that Mason thought were gone, when in fact they were stored and emerged to squeeze his heart again.
And he knows that in a few days you'll be gone again, he knows it'll be shit again and it'll be another eight months to forget everything. 
“I feel like we haven't ended things between us yet, but I'm not ready for that. Man, I love her so much, she's gonna kill me again” Mason confessed, and for months he hadn't talked about you to anyone but Aimee. His mother would always ask, but Mason wouldn't talk about it to her, or anyone else. 
The funniest thing was that even the fans said that there was something wrong with Mason, but he always said that everything was fine while putting that sadness deeper in his heart. 
“Don't let her bring you down again then” Declan said it like it was obvious, but it was easy for him because he had Lauren, Jude and he was happy.
“It's not that simple.” 
“Make it so.”
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“You look so pretty, I'm gonna ruin my makeup from crying this much” you said as you shook your eyes to stop crying as you looked at Aimee in the wedding dress. “I have never seen such a beautiful bride.”
“Please, stop, you're making me emotional and I can't cry” Aimee said looking at the ceiling, and then you approached and hugged her, saying once again how beautiful she was. “You look beautiful too, that color looks wonderful on you.”
“I know, I really look good in blue” you joked, and she laughed as the two of you checked to make sure everything was ready for Aimee to get married. “Let's check if we have everything.”
Aimee agreed and went to the window to see the place where the ceremony was taking place. All the guests were already there and in a few minutes it would be her turn. The day was beautiful, and everything was perfect. You walked over to the window, looking down at where the guests were sitting, and even without meaning to, your gaze quickly found the person who had been your thoughts for months.
Mason was laughing with Declan and Reece, and he had no way of seeing you there but you could even see his eyes closing as he laughed. He looked so happy, he didn't look like the same sad-hearted man you'd met two days ago, and for a moment you felt good that Mason was smiling.
“Did you talk to him?” Aimee asked, and you nodded.
“He hates me” you shrugged because it's the truth. 
“He doesn't hate you, don't be silly, Mason loves you so much, he just didn't know how to deal with you leaving.” 
“It doesn't matter now” you wiped away a tear and turned to Aimee, smiling at her. “So, something old?”
“My grandmother's earrings” Aimee pointed to her grandmother's gold earrings, and they really were beautiful. 
“Something new?”
“My dress.”
“Something borrowed?”
“My shoe.”
“Something blue?”
“The sexy lingerie I'm wearing underneath.”
“Oh, spare me the details” you rolled your eyes, and then smiled nervously ‘cause the time was finally coming. Aimee's father came in to call her and you finally left, but not before wishing her good luck.
You went down to where the ceremony would be and greeted a few people, some surprised and happy that you were back in England. Lauren waved and called you over, so you quickly walked over to her, sighing because Mason was there too. You felt your hands sweat as you walked down the hallway, as well as your heart racing.
“Hey guys” you said and almost groaned when you saw that the empty seat Lauren had saved was next to Mason. “Is this place for me?”
Mason looked at you and you almost forgot how to walk, because he had this effect on you, making you nervous with just a look. He was so handsome, he looked like he was ready for his own wedding. You quickly looked away from him, but Mason didn't stop looking at you for a second.
“Sure” Lauren smiled and you wanted to kill her. You sat next to Mason, controlling your breathing, and even so he didn't stop looking at you, leaving you blushing. 
“You're drooling man, control yourself” Reece spoke softly to Mason, and Mason cleared his throat and shifted in his chair, making RJ laugh. You were talking to Lauren because you had nothing to talk about with Mason, but his cologne was all around you, making you drunk by the smell of the perfume he had been using for years. 
Everyone cried or got emotional when Aimee walked in, especially Henry who cried like a baby when he saw her walking towards him. You and Lauren were almost sobbing throughout the ceremony, and Declan was already laughing at you. 
When they said their vows was when you and Mason looked at each other, and a racing heart because of his deep gaze on you made you come closer and hold his arm, leaning your face against his suit in a loving way, and it was the closest to love you had come in eight months.
Because Mason means love to you, and not even so many months apart have changed that.
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“I'm nervous, I forgot the speech paper” you whispered to Anthony, Aimee's brother, and he shrugged with a laugh.
“Not my problem, Y/N, I've already said my speech.”
“Okay, I can do this” you took a deep breath and he helped you climb onto a chair. Everyone had already eaten dinner and everything was so spectacular, it would be a wonderful night for your best friend. 
You trembled as you saw all the eyes on you, but you held the microphone and smiled to pretend you weren't nervous.
“I wrote some words on a piece of paper but I forgot the paper at home, so I'll have to improvise, I hope the bride and groom don't mind” everyone laughed at what you said and you felt your cheeks heat up, speaking in public wasn't very easy, speaking at a wedding was even worse. “I remember the day Aimee came to me when we were in college a few years ago and said she met the coolest guy in the world and I said "impossible, no man is the coolest in the world" and yet she said he was.” 
“In fact Henry, you proved that you are really a very nice guy and Aimee was right, ‘cause she shines when she looks at you, just like we can see in your eyes how much you love her. I could tell you all about some of the embarrassing moments of the two of them, but I prefer to talk about love cause I think everyone would like to hear it.”
“I once asked my mom how she knew my stepdad was the right person for her and she told me it had to be someone special. It's a person who doesn't mind being silent by your side because they know that everything is fine even without talking. It's someone who makes you happy just by remembering that person for a minute of the day or the whole day. It's someone who doesn't judge you, doesn't embarrass you or devalue what you feel.”
Even without wanting to, your gaze fell on Mason, and he was staring at you on top of that chair with a microphone in your hand. He was paying attention to every word that came out of your mouth and you almost lost focus because it hurt so much knowing that you would never have him in your life again.
“You two are each other's special person. I'm sure everyone here has someone special, and it's worth dropping everything when you know you have someone by your side to love you and go through everything with you, because that's how love works.”
Your eyes filled with tears and you had to stop looking at Mason ‘cause even he got teary-eyed listening to you. You looked at Aimee and she was crying and trying not to ruin her makeup as she ran her hand over her eyes, and Henry next to her smiled as he wiped a tear that ran down his face too. 
You also had to wipe away the tear that ran down your face. 
“Here's to Aimee and Henry. May their lives be wonderful” you raised your glass of champagne and everyone raised their own, toasting to their new life together. Anthony helped you down from the chair and you quickly went to your seat, but in reality you wanted to go out and cry.
Mason didn't take his eyes off you and you started to feel suffocated, especially since he hadn't even wanted to come near you for two days and he still left you in pieces when you tried to talk to him.
“I've never heard such beautiful words, Y/N” Aimee Aimee hugged you and you smiled, still with tears in your eyes. “Thank you for coming, thank you for being my best friend. I love you so much.”
“I love you too, Aim.”
You didn't even make it to the table because everyone stopped to congratulate you on your beautiful speech, and when you finally got there, Mason was no longer there. 
“Where is he?” you asked RJ, and he said that Mason had gone to the bathroom, before anyone could stop you again, you went to look for him. 
You waited a few minutes before Mason came out of the bathroom and saying that he was surprised to see you waiting for him was nothing new. You stared at each other for a few seconds before another guy came out of the bathroom and you and Mason had to break contact, so you pulled him by the hand and walked down the hallway until you found another door. 
Mason didn't say anything as he followed you, and when you saw that it was a warehouse and there was no one there, you went in and pulled Mason with you, pushing him against the wall.
“I love you” you whispered and Mason's eyes widened, shocked because he finally heard the three words he wanted to hear so much. Maybe it was too late and you would never be together again, but at least you got your feelings off your chest and told Mason. “Oh my God, I love you.”
“What?” Mason put his hand over his mouth, not wanting to show his smile, but he was smiling so much it was impossible to hide it. “I didn't hear.”
“I love you, I love you, I love-.” You had never felt such relief when Mason reached out and pulled your mouth against his.
Kissing Mason is like Christmas morning, or the morning of your birthday or the birthday of someone you love. Feeling Mason's arms is like feeling like nothing in the world can bring you down ‘cause you have someone protecting you from everything and ready to fight with you. 
“Does he ask to hold your hand?” Mason whispered and then kissed you again, and you couldn't respond because you were busy feeling the wonderful taste of his lips. “I bet he doesn't kiss you like I do.” 
Mason held you with both hands on your neck, and then he brought his hand to the back of your neck and grabbed your hair, making you pull your mouth away from his and look at him.
Why did he have to be so handsome?
And that stupid blond hair, that made you want to take his clothes off completely.
The look on your face was probably desperate with desire ‘cause Mason smiled and ran his tongue over his lips, staring at your mouth. 
“No” you confessed, feeling Mason smile. “You're the only one who knows how to touch me and how to love me.”
Mason smiled when you responded and pulled your mouth against his once more, wrapping his arm around your neck and holding you against him. It was okay, you didn't want to be anywhere else but in his arms.
Mason pushed you against the wall and you gasped ‘cause his body against yours gave you protection. How did you manage to go so many months without him? You only knew one home, and that was next to Mason. 
You'll never be able to live in Australia alone again. 
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
“Are you ready for a wedding?” Mason asked as he kissed your skin, and he whispered it because of the blue panties you were wearing. You weren't discreet when you left the wedding together and you heard your friends cheering when they saw you get into Mason's car, and you hadn't been able to stop smiling for hours, ever since he kissed you for the first time. “Something blue…”
You sighed as Mason showered you with kisses, you were numb with his body on top of yours. You didn't know how much you had missed this, these moments with Mason where you completed each other like soulmates, because only he knew how to drive you crazy. 
“There is still something borrowed and something old missing” you said, closing your eyes and bringing your hands to Mason's hair. His breath was on your groin and you almost moaned, because you were tired but you needed Mason so much that you felt like you were going to explode. “But we can think about it.”
“I don't want you to think about anything but me right now, love.”
✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹
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It's been a month since you got back to Australia and you and Mason have been trying to keep things at arm's length, but it's really hard because when you're waking up, Mason's going to sleep or when you're working, Mason's waking up.
But ever since you set foot in England again, you knew that this was where you belonged, and when you returned to Australia, you didn't think twice when you asked for a transfer again.
Your boss agreed and said that you could get the same position in England, but you would have to wait a few weeks for all the paperwork to be ready. No one knew you were  coming back because it would be a surprise to both Mason and his mom or his friends.
And at that moment you were at Manchester airport ‘cause the first place you were going was home. Mason. You don't even know if he's at home, if he's training, he might even be with someone else there and you feel like you might faint when you think about it.
It's already getting dark and cold, but you’re at an Uber with the only two suitcases of stuff you'd taken to Australia with you. The car dropped you off in front of Mason's house and if you weren't so nervous you would roll your eyes at the size of the place. 
You rang the bell at the gate and after a few rings you heard a bark and raised your eyebrows, because you didn't know Mason had a dog. 
“Hello?” His voice was hoarse and you almost cried, you were missing him so much it was making you sick.
“Hi, were you the one who asked for a girlfriend?” you were smiling and everything was silent for a few seconds until you saw the door to the house open quickly. Mason ran barefoot on the wet grass and you couldn't stop the tears from falling down your face. 
“What the fuck? Are you insane?” Mason pulled you against him, lifting you off the ground as you jumped against him and wrapping your legs around his hips. “I thought you were in Australia, my god I missed you so much. I love you, I love you” Mason whispered and squeezed you, without letting you go. 
“I love you, I'll never leave, never again” you cried as you hugged him, trying to hold onto Mason everywhere so he would never let you go again. “You are my home Mason, I'm sorry for everything, I know I don't deserve it but I just want to be with you forever.”
“I can't believe you're back, I'm dreaming” Mason finally let go of you and put you on the ground, then he pulled you in and kissed you after more than a month away from your lips. “You're still going to kill me by doing these things to me.”
Mason pulled your bags and pointed to the entrance of the house, and you walked as he pulled your things. You stopped when a puppy ran out of the house towards you, and you bent down to pet it.
“Oh my God, we already have a child?” you joked and Mason just smiled and crouched down to be close to you. The puppy jumped on your legs and then ran to Mason, who petted his fur.
“This is Ace, he’s a boy and he has been my new company since you left me alone.”
“Ahh, poor boy, he had to put up with you crying for long weeks.”
“His mommy is home now” you stood up and looked at Mason, kissing him once more. 
“My home is wherever you are.”
109 notes · View notes
jaredpadonlyyyy · 2 days
Note
Could you make a fic where Sam and Fem!Reader finally get a motel room alone without Dean and enjoy the night?
𝙁𝙄𝙉𝘼𝙇𝙇𝙔 𝘼𝙇𝙊𝙉𝙀
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• 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏, 𝙋𝙐𝙍𝙀 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏, 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏𝙏𝙔 𝘼𝙎𝙁
• 𝙈𝙄𝙉𝙊𝙍𝙎 𝘿𝙊 𝙉𝙊𝙏 𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙀𝙍𝘼𝘾𝙏 𝙄 𝙒𝙄𝙇𝙇 𝘽𝙇𝙊𝘾𝙆 𝙔𝙊𝙐.
• 𝙐𝙉𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙏𝙀𝘾𝙏𝙀𝘿 𝙎𝙀𝙓 (𝘞𝘳𝘢𝘱 𝘪𝘵 𝘶𝘱 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘴) 𝙁𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙀𝙍𝙄𝙉𝙂, 𝙎𝙊𝙈𝙀 𝘿𝙄𝙍𝙏𝙔 𝙏𝘼𝙇𝙆, 𝙐𝙎𝙀 𝙊𝙁 𝙔/𝙉, 𝙋 𝙄𝙉 𝙑, 𝘼 𝙇𝙄𝙏𝙏𝙇𝙀 𝘽𝙄𝙏 𝙊𝙁 𝙁𝙇𝙐𝙁𝙁, 𝙈𝙊𝙎𝙏𝙇𝙔 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏.
𝙎. 𝙒𝙄𝙉𝘾𝙃𝙀𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙭 𝙔/𝙉
• 🎀 • • • • 🤍 • • • ✨ • • ✨ • • • 🤍 • • • • 🎀 •
Sam and Y/N had to get a room together because of the fact that Dean, wanted to bring a woman over to the room. So that left her and Sam alone in the room. It’s not that they minded. They had slept in the same bed. But lately. Sam and Y/N had, had some kind of attraction towards each other. She just couldn’t help the fact that he was handsome. She had eyes, she could clearly see how attractive the Winchester Boys are. But something about Sam’s personality draw her in. Y/N had known the boys since they were all kids.
Sam and Y/N were always best friends including Dean. But it was mostly both of them, since they were around the same age range. Dean is six years older than them. He was always with other girls as the best friends were left alone to be there for each other. Even though they were the bestest of friends. They shared their first kiss together to get it out of the way. That wasn’t the only thing they both had shared. They also lost their virginity’s to each other.
They were each other’s first in everything, but there was no kind of feelings that came from all of that. They had both thought it was better to be each other’s first. Then to be other people’s first, strangers at that. Both of them still remember that day like it was yesterday. After that day. They had done it a few more times. That was until Y/N had gotten her first boyfriend at the age of 16. They had to stop what they were doing. But that relationship lasted a week.
She placed her bag in the only bed in the room and she sighed. “They didn’t have another room with another bed?” She asked the tall hunter as he rolled his eyes. “What? You kick hard in your sleep.” She told him as he puts his duffle on the bed same as her. “Well, then I’ll sleep on the couch.” He shrugged his shoulders and she shook her head. “No way I’m going to let you do that.” She told him as she grabs her bag and walked into the bathroom to take a good shower after the hunt they had. She got undressed and stepped into the hot shower letting it hit her body as she sighs letting the stress from the hunt melt away from her body. After she was done. She dried herself and changed into her night clothes.
Which consisted of a very short pink satin nightgown with nothing underneath. She hated sleeping with anything that consisted of undergarments. Hated the feeling of not feeling comfortable when she slept. “You going to shower?” She asked him as he snaps out of his thoughts. Unbeknownst to her. His dirty thoughts about what’s underneath the nightgown.
Sam hasn’t gotten laid in a while and being alone with the woman he’s been in love with since he was a child. Where doing things to him. He just wanted to grab her and bend her over the table and fuck her until all the people in the motel knew his Sam and the way she screamed it. Sam shifted uncomfortably as he imagined that. So, he grabbed his bag and quickly walked into the bathroom as he hid the problem he had going on in his pants. Closing the door he groans
Y/N and Sam laid on the bed with the lights off, but they weren’t able to fall asleep.
After a while Sam and Y/N turn to face each other and they sighed. “This is this suddenly weird for us?” She asked Sam as he lightly chuckled. Sam reached over and pulled her hair behind her ear as she closed her eyes. Y/N felt the bed rustling and she opened her eyes watching as Sam got closer to her, she did nothing to move. Sam closed the gap between them and places his soft lips on hers as he softly had his hand on her cheek. Y/N reached behind Sam and she ran her hands through his hair giving it a light pull as he moaned softly into the kiss as it started to get heated. Sam got in between her legs not breaking the kiss as his hands ran up her thigh up her nightgown. Sam pulled away from the kiss and he kissed down her neck slowly pulling the straps on her gown down as he softly, gently kissed her shoulders.
Y/N buckled her hips up rolling her own with him as he hissed. She moaned as she felt how hard he was, and how big he felt under his boxer shorts. She had forgotten that he had always been on the bigger side. Her nails drags along his body as she gets to the waist band of his boxer shorts and reached inside of him lightly touching his long, thick cock. “Fuck.” Sam softly whispered as he felt the pad of her fingers on the tip of his dick. Sam pulled her nightgown up to her body and looked at her body sitting back so he could get a view of that glistening pink pussy. He bites his lip as the pad on his fingers run through her folds making her gasp and arch her back off the bed.
“So wet for me.” Sam said as he lightly touched her clit. “So good for me.” He said as his finger went to her entrance teasing it making Y/N whimper as the feeling of his fingers touching her hole. Y/N opened her mouth to say something, but instead her head fell back into the pillow as Sam’s middle finger enters her. “Aah!” Her back arched as Sam went in and out of her. “Fuck, Sam. So good.” She moaned as Sam curled and finger fucked her in a steady. “Faster!” She said and gasped louder as Sam decided to add another finger into her pussy. “So tight.” He groaned.
Sam has his middle finger and his ring finger inside of her as he went so fast. His jaw clenched as she moaned louder. “God! I’m cumming, fuck!” She shook violently. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as a wave of her orgasm hits her as Sam curled his fingers. Wave after wave of pure pleasure hitting her all at once. Sam lightly moaned as he felt how her walls fluttered on his fingers. He could imagine how it felt with her around his cock as he fucked her hard.
Y/N slumped against the mattress breathing heavy as Sam slowed down taking out his fingers. She look up at him as he licked them clean making her close her legs at how sexy he looked licking her orgasm off his fingers. Y/N pulled the rest of her nightgown off tossing it to the side as Sam went and took off his boxer shorts throwing them aside getting in between her legs. He looked over at her body as he had, had dreams about her. His hands ran down her body, as it grazed her hardened nipples making her moan lightly as her back arched as chills erupted all over her body.
His hand reached her clit. The pad on his thumb rubbing it gently as she lets out a moan. He grabbed his dick pumping himself as he looked at her pretty pink pussy. He loved to her how her legs were spread open for him. He took his cock, his tip, gliding it from her entrance to her clit making her into a whimpering mess. “Sam, please.” She whined. “Beg.” He told her as she whined more. “Sam, I need you please.” She said to him gasping as his dick kept on gliding up and down on her, her legs slightly shaking as he as she clenched over nothing, breathing heavy moaning
Sam looked at her falling apart before his eyes. He looked at her and slides inside making them both gasp in pleasure. Her walls stretching as he fills her up. “Fuck! Aah!” She moaned loudly as he slowly rolled his hips into hers as he, himself groaned. “You’re so fucking tight.” Sam groaned as he pants.
“Faster, Sam!” She said. He held her hips and started to pick up his pace making her gasp and moan. Her hand shoots out to his hard abs as she gasped louder as he slammed into her. Her head rolled back as her mouth dropped open. His eyes solely on her as she was falling apart. Sam grunted as he looked down to where they both connected. His thumb going to her clit rubbing fast circles on it making her scream out his name over and over again as her hips buckled up.
Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as Sam’s moaning was bringing her to the edge of her climax. “God, Sam! Don’t stop! Don’t fucking stop!” She shook as he pressed her down onto the bed as the coil in her stomach exploded. “Ooh god!!” She shook her whole body in a euphoric state, she was seeing stars. Sam was moaning as his hips slammed into her hips his dick twitching hissing as she clenched around him. “Sam, cum.” She said as she looked at him. “Cum for me.” She told him. Sam grunts loudly as he released his seed inside of her halting his movements as he fell forward panting her walls white
Sam groaned his eyes screwed as he grunted in her ear. “Fuck, baby.” He whispered kissing her neck softly as Y/N hugged his sweaty body against hers. Letting out a breath Sam pulled out and rolled onto his back, trying to catch his breathing, his heart pounding in his chest from his orgasm. Y/N had her eyes closed with a smile on her face her body relaxed
Sam opened his eyes and looked at her. “I love you.” He said making her snap her eyes open.
She slowly sat up and looked over at him. Her eyes were wide open as she looked at him. “I have for a very long time.” He said as he also sat up. “Since we were kids.” He said as her eyes softened looking at him. Her fingers reached over and softly puts his messy sex hair behind his ear as she lovingly looks at him. “It’s so crazy, because, I think I love you, too.” She whispered to him making smile widely at her.
She leaned forward and placed her lips on his. Sam grabbed her hips putting her on top of him. “So, you’re mine?” He asked her softly with a small smirk on his face. “I don’t know, am I?” She said back with an even bigger smirk. “I think you are.” He said to her.
“Well, then.” She said lifting his chin up with her finger so he could look at her. “Show me.” She said.
Sam grabbed her from her waist flipping her on her back making her laugh out loud and they immersed themselves into another hot love making moment.
• 🤍 • • • • 🎀 • • • ✨ • • ✨ • • • 🎀 • • • • 🤍 •
𝙎. 𝙒𝙄𝙉𝘾𝙃𝙀𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙈𝘼𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙍𝙇𝙄𝙎𝙏
If you have any requests lmk. I’ll see what I can do. Since I don’t really do stuff like this. I can try. The only things I don’t do. Are daddy kinks or wincest, or age gap or peeing kink. But other than that feel free. I☺️ ps. I’m a destiel shipper but I don’t write destiel smut sorry.
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reguluskeys · 2 days
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jegulus snippet - 1036 words - i’m a very amateur writer </3
cw: self hatred (im projecting)
cody if you see this no u don’t
The moment James saw Regulus in the astronomy tower that night, he knew something was off. He had his legs to his chest and was resting his head on top, staring at the stars. James slowly walked towards him, and sat down with one leg dangling over the edge.
Regulus either didn’t notice him or was simply choosing to ignore him, so James tried again to get his attention.
“Reg? You ok?” James nudged the boy's shoulder. When Regulus finally looked over, James saw the face he’d seen a million times from Sirius, only- well it was different. While James could read every signal on Sirius’ face to know exactly how he was feeling, Regulus seemed to have a wall up. His lips were pressed into a line and his eyebrows were knit together into almost a scowl, but his eyes… His eyes were filled with a deep sadness that James wished he could pluck from Regulus and give to himself, just to never see it on the boy again.
Regulus’ eyes flickered, looking James over, before turning back to the night sky. “I’m fine,” he mumbled. James let the silence sit between them for a minute as he too stared at the Stars. He wondered if Regulus or Sirius were out tonight.
“Well… Something’s definitely wrong… but you don’t have to talk about it! I’ll be your ‘shoulder to cry on or whatever they say!” James gave Regulus a smile that could melt anyone’s heart.
Regulus tried to hide the small smile but James caught it immediately and laughed. “Oh! Is that a smile? Did Regulus Black just smile?” Regulus rolled his eyes but the smile didn’t fall. “Well this must go in the history books. Wizards for generations must learn of the- dare I say gorgeous - smile that you have. Personally, I feel blessed-!” Regulus cut him off with an elbow to the stomach but James just kept laughing.
“Shut up!” Regulus said, laughter in his voice. “My smile isn't- it's not ‘gorgeous.’” He let one of his legs fall and dangle over the edge, mirroring James.
“Uhm, yes it is! You even give Sirius a run for his money! Don't tell Remus I said that. Or Sirius.” At the mention of his brothers name, the smile on Regulus’ face faltered. James immediately noticed.
“Hey, you ok? Did I say something wrong?” James leaned towards Regulus and lightly put his hand on the boys shoulder. Regulus tensed and went slightly red, though James barely noticed.
“I’m fine,” he paused for a moment. “Merlin it’s just, why does Sirius treat me like I'm still 9?!” Regulus let out a frustrated groan and let the other leg fall over the edge. “Yes, I love Sirius and I want to make amends but I can fight my own battles, I can make my own decisions! He acts like I'm still the crybaby who would sneak into his room at night because I was scared a bogart was in my room, or the kid who never spoke to anyone but him because I was scared to embarrass myself.”
Though it was probably not the best moment, James was enchanted by Regulus. He’d never heard the boy speak that many words at once, let alone the amount of passion and emotion.
“I love him but sometimes I just want to strangle him or drown him in the lake!” Regulus made a vague gesture, strangling the air in front of him as though it was Sirius’ neck. James let out a small snort that Regulus thought sounded weirdly similar to that of a stag, but the thought was overtaken by the sudden embarrassment. His face was suddenly bright red.
“Well now that someone has heard my incoherent ramblings about my brother I must either kill you or myself, and right now I'd rather it be me, so goodbye James. Tell Barty he can’t have my money.” Regulus said in a completely monotone voice and began to stand up on the ledge.
“Hey wait! If you kill yourself now you’ll never be able to beat gryffindor at the quidditch match- well not that you would, i’m the best captain the schools ever seen, but you wouldn’t even get to try!” James scrambled to pull Regulus back down next to him. Regulus huffed and rolled his eyes.
“Fine, i won’t kill myself. But in exchange for you hearing that… I need to hear one of your secrets now. Not that James Potter would have much to hide.” Regulus rolled his eyes and James let out a chuckle.
James had never been a private person, everyone knew when he liked a girl or if he hated a class. Everyone could tell when a marauders prank was about to be in motion because James simply did not have a poker face.
There was one thing though. Something not even Sirius knew. His small smile didn’t falter as he looked straight ahead and spoke.
“Sometimes, I really, really hate myself.” James spoke in a calm voice, as if he’d just stated his favorite color, and not something that had just shattered Regulus’ view of the entire world. The boy just stared at James, and when he finally realized Regulus wasn’t going to say anything, he continued.
“Don’t get me wrong, I don't think I'm a bad person… I have great parents, great friends, I get good marks, I'm a quidditch captain, and if I tried hard enough I could get almost any girl I wanted, but…” James moved his glasses off his face and held them infront of him. “I don’t know I guess, sometimes there’s just something in the back of my brain telling me i’m a terrible person- that everything I do is wrong or that i’m not doing enough. Then I think about all the things i’m lucky enough to have and I hate myself even more for even having those feelings in the first place.”
Regulus took a moment to truly look at James. Not the dumb-jock facade he showed the school, no he looked at the James who despite being the embodiment of sunshine, was burning inside. The James who had bad days and the James who sometimes hated himself.
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thatsmzbitchtoyou · 2 days
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Sweet Pumpkin Chapter 5
Summary:  Bucky is struggling with the dating world and knows that if he ever hopes to have a serious relationship, that he needs to get through his touch deprivation issues.  It’s not that he doesn’t want to touch people, or them to touch him, but after decades of pain he doesn’t know how to accept physical intimacy from others, or how to give it himself.  He hires Y/N, an intimacy coach and professional cuddler, who comes highly recommended.  Will his heart be able to distinguish between a service given versus real love?
Warnings: mentions of past violence and past sexual assault, language, physical intimacy, eventual smut
**curvy reader
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Their relationship very quickly progressed after that.  Neither of them saw any point in waiting any longer when they both felt good about themselves and where the relationship was taking them together.  Bucky moved into her apartment, not bringing much of anything with him since he loved her stuff so much.  He only went on missions every once in a while, and only ones that were more stealth or surveillance.  He was tired, both physically and mentally, and ready for a slower, cozier life to settle into.
The hardest part was getting over the fact that she had other clients that she was helping and close with.  He met most of them in passing as they came in for appointments and he would disappear into the back rooms to let her work.  The jealousy of knowing that she was physically close with others like she’d been with him was hard to stomach, but his rational brain knew better than to fixate on the idea.  That was until she shut the door hard after a fairly new client he hadn’t met one day.  
Bucky opened the bedroom door and walked through the hallway to the main living room, finding Y/N hugging herself and leaning against the front door looking unhappy.  “Pumpkin?” he said, walking up to her.  “What’s wrong?”
Y/N shook her head and then rubbed her face harshly.  “I think I’m going to have to fire my newest client,” she said tiredly.
“Why?” Bucky asked, reaching up and grasping her hands.
Y/N looked up at him worriedly.  “Because he keeps pushing the contract boundaries.”
Bucky immediately became enraged.  He had to sign a contract when he first started working with her, and the rules and boundaries were extremely clear.  Y/N was a consummate professional, never pushing the boundaries beyond what was specifically listed within the contract.  She was friendly with her clients, as she had been with Bucky, but the second he had expressed feelings toward her she had ended their working relationship, she just so happened to reciprocate his feelings.  “Who is he?  What did he do?” he asked, trying to keep the anger and bitterness in his tone at bay.
Y/N sighed, and he could see she was upset but trying to keep her emotions under control.  “Helmut Zemo.  Retired Sokovian special ops.  He’s been very pushy about getting straight to the cuddling part, and just…” she swallowed harshly.  “He keeps giving me lingering touches on intimate parts of my body.”
Bucky inhaled deeply, his hands almost shaking as they held hers.  “Where?” he whispered, looking her over.
“My face,” she blinked rapidly to keep her oncoming tears back, her voice starting to wobble.  “My lower back, close to my butt.  And…” she paused, her lips trembling as she shut her eyes tight.  “He touched my breast.  He tried to play it off as an accident but…he squeezed it,” she released Bucky’s hands and hugged herself around her chest again.  
Bucky’s jaw clenched, his frown making his brow hurt from how tense he was.  He lifted his hands and cupped Y/N’s face, making her look at him.  Her tears started to fall and he quickly swept them away with his fingers.  “You’re going to call him,” he said, keeping his voice even and quiet, “and tell him that you’re voiding his contract for inappropriate behavior and touching.  If he decides to be an ass about it, I’ll take care of it.”
“Buck, you don’t have to–”
“Believe me, pumpkin,” he leaned down and kissed her nose.  “I’d love to.”
Y/N called the client a few minutes later, gripping Bucky’s hand tightly.  “Hey beautiful,” his voice rang out through the speakerphone.  
“You can’t call me that, Zemo,” she said simply.  “I’m just calling to inform you that our contract is officially void as of this moment, and I won’t be taking you as a client anymore.”
“Excuse me?” Zemo asked, his European accented voice angry.  
“Our sessions are canceled.  I will not be working with you,” Y/N said firmly.  
“And why may I ask?” Zemo sneered.
“For inappropriate behavior and touching,” she explained.  “Goodbye.”
“Y/N–” 
She hung up the phone and blocked his number, sighing heavily.  Bucky hugged her tightly.  “Good job, pumpkin.  I’m proud of you.  If he ever even looks your way again, you tell me and I’ll handle it.”
Y/N snorted.  “My big bad super soldier boyfriend is gonna come to the rescue?”
“Always,” Bucky said, kissing the top of her head.
@mishkatelwarriorgoddess @cjand10 @railmesebstan @danzer8705
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britcision · 2 days
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Technically it’s not Wednesday anymore and technically I should only be writing the next chapter, not several chapters down the line, but Jazz grabbed me by the throat so y’all get a rough draft on something that’s gonna be like, 2-3 chapters away 👀
Maybe 👀
Enjoy!
———————
Dan’s lips curled into an unpleasant snarl, pointed fangs suddenly more prominent.
“Oh, really, Danny. Did you think this was going to work? Some stupid illusion and I’d fall to my knees, sobbing for reconcilliation? Or did you bring me the real thing so you could watch me kill her in front of you this time? It might not stick but I’m sure I can try.”
Part of Danny nearly lunged forward, Obsession throbbing down to his core… but he held it in check. After all, this wasn’t the Jazz Dan had known; she wasn’t just a teenager anymore.
And she certainly wasn’t impressed.
“Daniel James Fenton, you know better than to talk about someone when they’re standing right in front of you,” she snapped, her hip cocked out and arms folded in an entirely done big-sister posture that only got scarier with age. “If you have something to say, say it to my face.”
And Dan… froze, for a moment. And Danny knew he’d been right in that second, that microsecond of hesitation. Of inactivity.
Sure, Jazz might be well past six feet tall herself now, but she looked like their mom enough to make his Vlad severely uncomfortable. More than that though… Danny had never gotten over the thought of her dying. Dan had broken the world about it.
And he couldn’t bring himself to look her in the eye.
It was covered up a moment later, in bluff and bluster as he scoffed and glared in her general direction.
“What, are you going to psychoanalyze me? Tell me how sad and tragic I am too? Give me a break, I’ve got some lovely coping mechanisms,” he snapped, aura flaring in a burst of green fire.
But Jazz had never been scared of Danny’s aura, and frankly? He was the Ghost King. Dan’s was a drip in the bucket by comparison.
She marched straight up to him, ignoring the flames completely, and grabbed him by the chin. Forced him to face her, even as his eyes widened, face freezing.
Danny had never heard her voice so cold.
“Is that supposed to be scary? Am I supposed to be impressed, Danny? Honestly, I’d like to say that must be the Fruit Loop’s influence, but you’ve always been a drama queen.”
And then she twisted him into a headlock, all 6’9 mountain of muscle like he was still a ninety-pound twink, and noogied him.
“You’re such a fucking dork, Danny.” She sounded almost fond now, exasperated, a tone Danny was painfully familiar with. Even knowing she wasn’t talking to him-him, the cringe was automatic.
Dan sure as hell had no idea what to do about it, panic flaring madly across his face and his aura, trailed by a lacklustre attempt at anger.
“Get your hands off me,” he roared, turning intangible and going to jerk himself away… and then Jazz’s eyes flashed teal and she reached after him, her own hand changing to pull him straight back into the noogie.
Something about that broke Dan completely, his entire body suddenly limp and held up only by Jazz’s continued grip on his head. He seemed almost catatonic, completely zoned out… which Jazz completely ignored, grinding her knuckles into the top of his head.
Danny was pretty sure he knew why though; it was the one thing which had always been able to calm him down, back when he was approaching his twenties and the possibility of Dan started giving him panic attacks. Jazz had snapped him out of it in a much gentler way, but it amounted to the same reminder.
Jazz was his big sister. His beloved mentor, his voice of reason, his rock. And after living in Amity Park for almost twenty years, directly on top of the Fenton Portal, she was liminal as hell and about one near-death experience from a halfa herself.
There was just no way he was ever going to lose her, until she decided she was good and ready to move on. It wasn’t possible, and a little thing like dying wasn’t going to slow Jasmine Fenton down.
If it happened before she graduated, Danny was pretty sure she’d rise before Finals Week even if she died the night before.
(And given her self-care habits, he did occasionally worry about it actually happening… but she promised her ghost-envy days were long behind her and she’d never get that bad.
Belief: pending.)
Danny wasn’t actually fully sure if her ghost-grabbing abilities extended to anyone else or if she could just always wrangle him, but he and Dan were the same person; enough so that it sure as hell worked on him.
Dan wasn’t going down without a fight though - Danny was almost a little impressed with how quickly he fought past the blue screen (it might have been Vlad’s influence, given the sudden haughty tone) as he began to shove at her arms, quickly working up to a shout.
“Get your hands off me! Do you have any idea who I am! I am the great destroyer, breaker of worlds, and you will not treat me like a small child!” He bellowed, struggling viciously against her grip.
If they were in the real world, it’d probably have worked. If he had access to any of his ghost powers, it wasn’t a fight Jazz could possibly have won.
But this was a dream, and either Nocturn had a damn good idea what’d happen to him if anything happened to Danny’s big sister in his realm… or he just plain liked Jazz better.
(Most people did. Danny was fine with it.)
Because the more Dan struggled, the more Jazz began slowly increasing in size, getting bigger and bigger until she entirely dwarfed him and had him cuddled like a doll under her arm. Watching him struggle at this point was just a little embarrassing, actually, and Jazz finally took pity on him.
And settled him on her hip like an unruly toddler, grinning down at him.
“Now, do you think you’re ready to actually talk to me?” She asked him gently - and if she found the sight of this full sized man so relatively tiny as funny as Danny did, it didn’t even show.
Dan glowered up at her.
“You may be favoured by the fool who runs this domain, but you will never be my equal in anything but dreams,” his snarled viciously, his anger apparently stoked by indignation.
(Danny made a note. Still definitely some Vlad tendencies.)
Jazz just chuckled softly, bumping him up to give him a kiss on the forehead.
“Oh, baby brother, you know that’s never going to be how it works,” she said brightly, then paused, glancing around. “Uh… Danny, we never talk about this again, alright?” She asked, squinting down at him.
Mildly offended that he was about the height of her ankles, Danny raised both hands in immediate surrender.
“Dude, I am not letting anyone try and get freudian on me for Jumbo-Jazz. My lips are sealed from self preservation alone.” And he’d have to make sure to emphasize to Nocturn just how valuable his own silence would be. Vital to survival, even.
Apparently satisfied, Jazz nodded, sitting carefully cross legged and settling Dan in her lap, her chin on top of his head.
“So… you told me about your future once, y’know?” She said slowly, while Dan struggled and once more surrendered to the indignity. “And Danny told me some more later. And, obviously, we all actually know that taking over and destroying the entire world isn’t actually a healthy way to process grief…”
“Fucking spare me,” Dan growled, looking about a minute away from taking a bite out of her hand.
Jazz ignored him.
“But… in spite of all of that…” she paused for a moment, leaning back and smiling down at Dan, who couldn’t quite help craning back to look at her… if only to know where the next attack was coming from. “It’s… really sweet to know that you’d break the world for me, Danny. I just really wish it hadn’t broken you, too.”
And once again, Dan froze… and for the first time, Danny could feel a crack in the impenetrable wall around his core. Between all of the performative rage and theatrics and what he really, truly felt.
Even his rally only managed to produce a vaguely sulky “I’m not broken!”
Jazz sighed softly and turned him gently in her arms, lifting him to hug tightly to her chest. She might have been shrinking now, either by Nocturn’s will or her own, but she held him close anyway.
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cakerybakery · 3 days
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I’m getting ads on tumblr for a love spell to bring an ex back (which is weird alone and no thank you) but…
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“So this spell will do what exactly? Make Eve go crazy for me again?” Adam asked, poking around the magic shop shelves as he waited for the demon behind the counter to mix together the ingredients for his purchase.
She paused. “It’ll bring you back your lost love. Make them see the future they could have with you if you were together. Help them fall in love with you again.”
Adam picked up brimstone skull, looked at the price tag, and quickly, and gently, put it back. “Yikes. And then we’ll bone. Nice.”
Maybe hell wasn’t so bad if he got Eve back. She left him centuries ago then got together with fucking Michael. Adam couldn’t believe both his ex-wives left him then immediately started fucking what was basically the same guy.
Fuck, man. Lucifer even fucked Eve after she left him. Then set her up with Michael! What the fuck was up with that? It’s like he didn’t want Adam to have Lilith or Eve but couldn’t keep Eve and handed her off to an inferior Lucifer as sloppy seconds.
Well, jokes on them. Lucifer and Michael were both eating out his sloppy seconds. Now he was going to steal Eve from Michael. Make the bitch want him again. He was going to cum in that cunt and then send her packing. Maybe he’d do the same to Lilith.
A thought sparked in his brain. ‘Or maybe I’ll string them both along. Get them both in my bed at the same time. Then dump them both.’
Yeah. He liked the idea of Lilith and Eve fighting to please his cock and then dumping them both and ruining both their relationships with the tiny twins.
Lucifer’s sad now? Adam would break that bitch.
His potion was done. Two drops in an eye dropper.
“You only need one.” The demon warned. “The second is just if you drop the first. Throw the whole thing into lava to get rid of the second drop. Drip the drop onto your wrist and they won’t be able to resist the visions. It only works on past love. So do keep that in mind. And no refunds, sweetie.”
Adam handed her the credit card he swiped from Lucifer that morning and left the shop.
He made his way slowly and windingly back to the hotel. Using Lucifer’s card to pick up some other shit that caught his fancy. When he got back he slipped it into Lucifer’s pocket easily.
Later he would overhear Lucifer mentioning finding it there to Charlie after searching the whole hotel for his credit card.
It took a couple of weeks but he managed to get Eve and Lilith to separately agree to meet with him at the same time.
He dressed as nicely as he could in his least ripped jeans and cleanest shirt, only worn twice since it was last washed, styled his hair up, and cleaned up his facial hair a bit.
Dabbing the first drop on his wrist, then the second to be sure. If one worked then two should work extra well, was Adam’s logic.
Now to snag the old goat’s card again. He’d treat the chicks to some salad or whatever bitches liked if they did a good job taking care of his cock.
It was easy enough to palm Lucifer’s wallet. He was trusting as an angel. Or perhaps he just thought no one would have the balls to steal from him. Adam got a couple feet with Lucifer’s credit card before his arm was grabbed.
“Adaaam!” Lucifer sang out. “How lovely to see you!”
He was pulled into a hug. Lucifer’s head resting on Adam’s gut and his hands -!
Adam squeaked as they squeezed his ass cheeks. Kneading them.
“HEY! Fuck, man! Get off me!” Adam shouted as he tried to shove Lucifer away.
Lucifer just giggled and grabbed harder. “I ever tell you, you’re pretty when you’re angry?”
“If you don’t let go of my ass,” he hissed, “I’m about to be the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen.”
“You already are, sweetheart.” Lucifer smiled up at him.
Adam’s heart skipped a beat and he froze. ‘What the fuck was that??’
Lucifer was giving him these big innocent eyes as his hands were spreading Adam’s cheeks. “Let me take you out, Adam. Anything you want. Then after I’ll do to you what I should have done in Eden.” His tongue licked his bottom lip before he bit it.
A picture was being painted in Adam’s mind. Those hands, that mouth, the hard dick pressed against his thighs.
Eden.
Lucifer had loved him once, apparently. The love potion was working. Working a little too well. Was this why he was only supposed to use one drop?
“Oh fuck me.” He muttered. Realizing too late that Lucifer heard him.
He went ridged against Adam. Lucifer’s smile grew until he was beaming. Adam couldn’t even get out an explanation that he wasn’t asking for Lucifer to fuck him, before he was hoisted onto Lucifer’s shoulder and the devil sprinted off like a madman.
It was hard to tell Lucifer to stop when his tongue was in Adam’s mouth.
He was only moaning a little.
Adam tried to protest the tearing of the front of his shirt but Lucifer stuck his face between Adam’s soft pecs, straight into the thick chest hair and motorboated him, not hearing a word Adam said.
“No means no.” Didn’t get past N! As Lucifer choked down his cock.
It rather quickly turned into an, “OH GOD! YES!” As Lucifer deep throated him suddenly.
Lucifer pulled off long enough to asks if Adam was ready for more. Adam very quickly agreed to more. He didn’t really notice what more was due to that talented throat until Lucifer was already in him.
Of course, Adam ran into that pesky problem again where when he tried telling Lucifer no, all that came out was an enthusiastic, “YES!” Or “MORE!”
This disconnect between his brain’s thoughts and his mouth’s words was very concerning for Adam, in the morning. Cause right then, even his brain was telling him they’d figure out how to get Lucifer to stop after the next orgasm.
He was very late for his dates. In fact, he never made it at all. Hell’s light was rising by the time Lucifer curled up next to him, completely spent.
Lucifer latched onto his side, a tail wrapped around Adam’s thigh, and now that the pleasure was wearing off, fuck he was pretty sore. But god, what a night. He hadn’t fucked like that since Earth! When fucking was new and they didn’t have kids.
Lucifer drew hearts on Adam’s chest with his finger and purred. “How was that, baby?”
“Good.” Was all his raw throat could squeak out. It was sore from all the screaming in pleasure.
“Hmm, excellent. I love you.”
“Yeah… about that.”
Adam limped back to his room. Lucifer had some words to say about Adam using a love potion to try and get Lilith and Eve in the sack. He had a lot of laughter when Adam told him what exactly the demon said about the potion and went, “never mind then. That’s not even a real a love potion. It can only show visions of the future, if they get together with you. It doesn’t compel someone to be with you if they don’t want to. I certainly had several of railing you all night and decided to take the chance while in a horny fever.”
Then Lucifer stuck his tongue down Adam’s throat once more before he was slapped on the ass and told to go get dressed and Lucifer would take him out for breakfast.
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alluralater · 4 months
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your new avatar AHHH i luv u <3
you are so sweet! it’s an old pic from like three or four months ago and i’ll be using it as a placeholder until i take some new hot ones. i have options currently but i have no clue which one to pick. i’d ask my cutiepie to choose but she is asleep and hopefully having the loveliest of dreams.
#asks#anons#allura.addressed💌#i miss her already. i barely even got to TEXT her today#i was only able to send her like 40 texts today and i’m DYING over those numbers. we talk a LOT. and with me being so busy today i figured i#could just call her which would have been amazing bc i get facetime fatigue like a mf.#her voice and her laugh and her smile are so soothing. i feel all my stress melt away with her and i was lowkey so sad that i didn’t get to#talk to her pretty much at all.#OMG AND I HAVE SNAPS THAT I DIDNT EVEN GET TO CHECK FROM HER??? KILL ME#this is truly sick and twisted. and i started telling my sisters about her and i got interrupted four times so i just left it. but i was#looking forward to that as well which did not get to happen so boo. throwing sad tomatoes.#i’m gonna listen to her voice notes and watch her videos and look at her beautiful face until i feel better (it’s gonna be instant ofc)#i started talking about how i was falling in love with her and about what she’s like and the fact that my little sister kept talking over me#wouldn’t usually be so bothering bc she’s like that but in this case i felt SO unheard. i am saying i am falling in love with the most#lovely woman i have ever met and— ugh it was tragic for my heart. my older sister was really excited though from what i was able to mention#to her separately just before my younger sister hopped on.#my older sister is 27 and my younger sister is 24 so there’s really not much gap between us btw which is why it was so rude like— bro HELLO!#anyways yes so back to the point (i’m so sleepy) i need a new avatar and i don’t know what to pickkkk
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toxictrannyfreak · 2 years
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Thinking about Matthias Nonius. Nonius as the one Gideon can never live up to. Nonius as Ortus’s ideal. Nonius as the Ninth’s last hero, what Harrow desperately needs to be. Nonius as the equal and rival of the Saint of Duty in all their forms. Nonius as the perfect cavalier; the one who fights for and obeys the Ninth out of unending duty, a millennium later. Nonius as what Harrow and Gideon and Ortus want to be, Nonius as the legend of the Ninth, Nonius as a poem, but never Nonius as a person. Nonius as a man entirely trapped by his own myth and memory and name. Nonius as Nonius, never Matthias, always and forever the Ninth. Nonius as a heap of bones forgotten long from home, free from the Ninth at last. Just. Just thinking about Matthias Nonius
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fraberry-stroobcake · 7 months
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is it gay to be so overwhelmed with emotions by thinking about someone you care about so much you almost want to pick up writing again
#- but also it’s night time and you can’t fall asleep even though you need to get up early#and you’re just stuck imagining the lines you want written down#so your only options are to do it now while they’re still there#or not and then forget all of them in the morning and cry#hi i’m the gay one help i haven’t been in this state in a while#i’m just in that state again somehow i guess#probably because i never got a chance to tell this person how something so small for them meant a world to me in that moment#i hope i’ll be able to tell you all that myself in a more direction way but i love you so much you mean the world to me#okay i don’t actually want to scare you off by saying that but knowing what my mind is imagining for this you’d think that yourself anyway#i should probably stop taking now it’s way too late and i’m being tooooo emotionally vulnerable rn#hi guys sleepy night time frab here i’m the (other) emotion + vulnerable one#don’t you love to see it#i wonder if anyone is still down here reading these tags#hi if you are! send aaaa hmmm send a little ‘£; e’ if you read to this point#also why r u still reading? weirdoooo /jk love you#but really don’t be down here too long i’m sorta bleeding all my feelings out right now#because i’m so bad at expressing myself directly and as soon as i want to#ugh i’ll leave now i’m lonely and talking to myself too much again#night night everpony#frabrant#wonder if i’ll write more again… ok i’m LEVAING now gah
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reflectionsofgalaxies · 2 months
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i have thought of 1 (one) pro to this whole housing situation and i’m clinging onto it for dear life
#that being the enhanced freedom of living alone/away from family again#just generally being able to have routines and (hopefully) have them be respected in shared living spaces#of course that depends on who i find as a roommate but i’m choosing to stay optimistic#and on the note of freedom that includes more social freedom to have people over#like games nights with friends and stuff#or like. people staying over occasionally.#which technically i could do before it’s just wildly uncomfortable so i generally don’t#it’s the fear of not having a place to fall back to if things go wrong#that’s really getting to me#because my family is so spread out that even if i was able to crash on my mom or grandma’s couches (bc they both live in small one bedrooms)#they’re both so far away (literally a several hour ferry ride in my mom’s case)#that i wouldn’t be able to continue work or school if i had to do that#my dad is looking for a place in the cities around where we are now but that’s not certain at all and again one bedroom#BUT#and this is a HUGE thing that my friend reminded me of#i have friends in my life who would also support me if it came to that (totally not crying while typing this)#he reminded me that his family has even said in the past that i always have a place to stay with them#and i even did at one point for several weeks when our house got all its wall torn out bc of massive water leaks#and i know i have at least two other friends who would do the same if i really needed it#and i’m so so so fucking lucky#i may not have a ton of people in my life but the people i do have are better people than i ever could have hoped for#i stumbled into knowing (and this is no exaggeration) i believe some of the kindest most compassionate loving people in existence#i was always such a sucker for found family stuff and it was only in the last two years or so that i realized that’s what i have#okay stress crying has turned to emotional gratefulness crying#still physically unpleasant but emotionally incomprebly better#personal
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dutybcrne · 6 months
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Kaveh definitely wants at least one child of his own. Partially to continue his family line, partially bc he himself loves the idea of having a family of his own. He would however like to move out of Alhaitham’s place before he even dares consider getting a partner to begin with. And the longer he stays there, the more stress he feels thinking about it. He even has sketched out nursery ideas and plans on how to raise them all set to go, if only he'd get out of debt fast enough-
Furina also really wants to have a child of her own. She adores seeing the families around Fontaine, and has dreamed a great deal what parenthood would be like. Nothing brings her joy than when children about Fontaine invite her to join in on the little games they are playing, leaving her giddy and smiling bright as sunshine on her way home. Of course she knows that to be a parent, she really has to get her shit together. One can't just rear a child on macaroni and residual payments, after all.
#hc; kaveh#//Mans is stressing#//He’s like ‘I’m damn near pushing 30; I should have my life together by now aaAAAA’#//Do like the idea of Haitham & Kaveh coparenting though#//Them raising a kid together; be it romantically/qp involved or just like#//Some Full House situation type beat lol#//Haitham does like helping kiddos learn after all. And it would make SO much a lot easier for Kav#//Kaveh would preferably want an even number of kids if he has a partner; so they don't ever feel lonely#//If it's just him & his kiddo; then yeah; he's a little more fine w only one. But he really wants them to have someone to fall back on jic#hc; furina#//She's had thoughts of having children of her own for damn near 500 years#//Which she knew would be Impossible; her role came first and foremost#//But now that she's free from that obligation; the thoughts came welling back up#//It's not entirely why she wants to stand on her own right and get better at so many things; but it is part of it#//She'd love the idea of having her own little family at last#//Though her Salon Solitaire buddies will have to do djbhgjfd#//She doesn't actually know how many she wants tho; maybe one if she's single; but whatever her partner is down for; she would be too#//She would be such a doting mom hjcbffg#//She genuinely wouldn't even mind not having a partner if it came down to it. She will most certainly be able to handle a kiddo on her own#//She thinks that; yet she also most certainly get overwhelmed Real quick at first#//Esp since she'd be such a sympathetic crier when it comes to her babu. & bc she already feels the urge to cry when frustrated#//But she would try her best#//Would absolutely consult with The Gals each and every time she needs anything#//Deffo would be the type to get matching outfits for her and her kid jffghh
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whenthegoldrays · 4 months
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Hmm
#pondering#I can’t believe it’s been a year since I gave up on my last crush#it seems like so long ago I feel like I’ve lived eight lifetimes since then#but it also feels like just yesterday#and yet I feel so…. distant from him#I mean I also never see him anymore#the only reason I did then is because I’d seek him out#and even then….#idk what I’m trying to say#just that things change#and myself of two years ago would be amazed#that I’m able to have a normal life and think about him minimally and painlessly#because two years ago I was in the DUMPS#I went through this intense phase where I just felt like I *had* to be with him and got to the point where I’d just cry out of fear that#that I’d die before I got a chance to make him fall in love with me#it was so bad I was so paranoid and lovesick and and and.. ough#I still remember that night so well#it was also a Wednesday like today and it had been an awful day and I had a headache#and I just thought. I can’t take this anymore. where are we even going. he’s never going to notice me never#i GIVE UP#it was mostly an impulse but looking back I’m so glad I followed that particular impulse#it’s like when Edmund walked out of Mary’s house not because he was super resolved but more on an impulse of the moment#just felt like the thing to do. and I may have regretted it once or twice afterwards but in the end it absolutely WAS the right call#and a couple months later YOU-KNOW-WHO showed up#absolutely insane events happening to me last year.#but now ​I feel like the girl from that one video#“girl who is going to be okay” djdjdhdh#but really! I will be!#and I am even! just taking it one day at a time#elly's posts
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jojea · 11 months
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sadly the steamdeck had to charge immediately after i finished in the character creator but look at my tav, boy
it is mandatory
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