Tumgik
#and then Sam desperately wishes for obliviousness again
jenanigans1207 · 3 months
Text
I just love the idea that Cas and Dean actually manage to be sneaky in the beginning of their relationship, keeping it secret not because they don’t trust Sam or are ashamed but because they need to feel solid in it themselves before they tell anyone. So they’ve actually done a spectacular job of keeping quiet and not getting caught.
And then one day Cas and Dean are sitting at the table in the bunker kitchen, half asleep while Cas sips coffee and Dean munches halfheartedly on soggy cereal, when Sam comes back from his morning run.
“There you guys are!” He says as he pulls his headphones out of his ears. “I’ve been waiting for you to get up!”
“Why?” Dean asks, dropping his spoon into his bowl and splashing a little milk over the side. “You find us a case?”
Sam shakes his head as he heads to the fridge for a bottle of water. “I think there’s something wrong with the bunker.”
“What kind of something?” Dean asks, casting a curious glance around.
The bunker had seemed fine to him. Nothing strange had happened. No weird noises, no strange smells, nothing creepy or daunting that was outside of the ordinary as far as living completely underground went.
“Well, the lights have been acting weird.” Sam begins, thinking. “And the electricity will just randomly short out. It’s like all the fuses blow at once, or something, even when nothing has changed.”
Dean, still half asleep and only a few sips into his own coffee, doesn’t immediately make the connection. But Cas seems to go incredibly still across the table from him.
“Huh.” Dean says, pushing his bowl away and reaching for his mug. “I haven’t seen any of that. When is this happening?”
Dean still hasn’t pieced it together, but Cas is sending him a solid, desperate stare over the rim of his own mug. Dean’s mind is trying to kick on, to figure it out, and then Sam says—
“Well, most recently was last night. You were already in bed. And Cas— I don’t know where you were.”
And oh. Oh. Dean understands now.
Because yeah, he had been in bed last night. It just so happens that Cas had been in his bed, too. And they were— busy, but sleeping isn’t exactly what they were doing.
Dean purposely does not meet Cas’s gaze.
“Weird.” Dean says with a shrug that he hopes is nonchalant.
“Yeah,” Cas finally manages to agree, his fingers tight around his mug. “That is strange, I haven’t noticed it, either. We’ll have to keep an eye out for it and address it if it’s an electrical issue.”
Sam, beautiful, sweet Sam, doesn’t seem to notice anything amiss. He shrugs. “Yeah, just let me know if you notice it. Maybe it’s just a weird fluke.”
And it will be awhile yet before Sam understands why this only happens when he’s alone in the bunker at night, why it never happens when Dean and Cas stay up with him to the early hours of the morning to research. Sam will live confused but peacefully oblivious for as long as they can all get away with.
1K notes · View notes
mostlymarvelsstuff · 1 year
Text
Requested by: @romanoffsbish #6 “Are you really so oblivious?” ; WandaNat•Tony says it to R who’s currently “googly” eyeing the couple from across the room with a sad smile, and Tony’s had enough of the dancing around each other nonsense. 
Authors note: requests are still closed. I’m trying to clear my inbox before opening them again. Thank you for your patience 💖
Word count: 2898   WandaNat Masterlist   Marvel Masterlist
Tumblr media
   Wanda giggles as Natasha playfully spins her around the kitchen, the ingredients for their pancakes quickly forgotten as the spy initiates an impromptu dance session to the music that plays from the Sokovians phone. 
   They don’t even notice the attention paid to them by the few of their teammates over at the table. Sam smiles at the scene before returning to his oatmeal and Tony pretends to gag at the display of affection before he sits down with his omelet. 
   “Let them be Stark” Thor chastises with a mouth full of poptart,  “Love is special, and it deserves to be celebrated”
  “I know that goldilocks” he retorts with an eyeroll, “Besides, I doubt they even heard my teasing."
   Clints brow quirks as he drops his banana peel on the table and his eyes meet yours as you glance up from your plate. You both share a knowing look before smirks spread on both your faces.
  “Oh yeah” the archer agrees, “No way the super spy with super senses heard you. Ridiculous notion”
   You chuckle at the nervous expression that crosses the billionaires face only to earn a glare from him in turn, “At least I let my feelings be known”
   Mistaking his jab at your not so hidden feelings for more teasing you simply toll your eyes and grumble, “Whatever Tony”
   “Is he bothering you malysh(baby)?” Wanda voice suddenly rings out through the dining room and Sam has to suppress his laughter at the way Tony's complexion pales slightly 
   “Oh. Uh, no. No, he's just being his normal, annoying self” you tell her, smiling over where she stands with her girlfriend at the kitchen island.
   “Good” Natasha says, her tone sending a chill through both you and Tony but for different reasons, “Otherwise I’d have to punch him”
   “I’m right here you know” the man says, waving his fork in the air
   “Oh I know. I just don’t care.” she replies, sending a wink your way 
   You try your best to ignore the warmth that spreads across your cheeks at the action, instead focusing back on the man next to you again. He purses his lips, letting out a small huff in annoyance and you laugh at the Russians ability to get under his skin so easily. You completely miss the way Natasha beams at Wanda for being able to make you produce the sound they both adore so much.
   “Y/n?” 
   You turn to look at the brunette again, “Yeah Wans?”
   “Tasha and I were going to go into the city today. Do some shopping, go to lunch, sit in the park for a little bit and maybe get some ice cream. Then we were gonna watch a movie when we got home. Would you like to join us?”
   “I’m sorry guys, I have a briefing to attend in like half an hour. I think I’m being sent on an impromptu mission.”  you tell them as you stand and walk back to the kitchen with your dirty plate to clean, “I hope the two of you guys have fun though”
   “Oh, ok” the witch responds, her shoulders deflating at both the missed opportunity and the distance you’ve created. Truthfully both she and Nat have noticed you being a bit more distant with them lately and it was worrying them, "Maybe next time then"
   Though you feel nervous about spending that much alone time with the women you nod, "Yeah next free day I have we can definitely do something" 
   Natasha doesn't like the knot of discomfort she feels in her gut. She doesn't know what other team members are going with you on this sudden mission but she desperately wishes that she or Wanda was on the chosen team. She feels better when one of them is there to watch over you. What if something happens to you today?
     The look her girlfriend gives her indicates she feels the same way about this situation and Nat wishes there was something she could do to change things, but there isn’t. So she settles for doing something that both shows she cares and helps slightly settle her nerves.
   “Just be careful out there, ok kotenok(kitten)?”
   You smile at her, “Always Nat. I’ll see you guys later.”
   The two continue to stand there a few minutes after you leave. The worry for your fate on this mission and the disappointment for your lack of presence in their lives of late might as well shine over their heads like neon signs in Vegas. So Tony decides to do his best to reassure them.
   “Try not to worry too much” he says, placing a hand on each woman's shoulder, “T’Challa and I are going with her. Hill will be there too so she's in good hands. I can’t promise no harm will come to her because you know how hectic these things can get, but I can promise that I’ll bring her back in one piece.”
   “Thanks Tony. I just wish we could go with her.” Wanda tells him, a sad smile on her face, “We like being able to see that she's safe”
  “I know. Which is why I will do my best to stick to her like glue, and have her home in time for your movie”
   Nat turns to him with a smirk, “You know, don’t you?”
   He chuckles, “You may be a spy, Romanoff but there's no hiding that look. Plus witchy here doesn’t know what it means to have a poker face”
   “Hey! I can keep a straight face” she huffs, crossing her arms. 
   Natasha quirks a brow at her girlfriend, earning a glare that makes her chuckle, “I didn’t even say anything”
   “You didn't have to, I heard your thoughts” she replies, making the redhead smirk
   “Good luck Romanoff” Tony cuts in, “I’m off to the briefing”
Tumblr media
   Several hours later the quinjet lands back down at the compound and you and your team tiredly shuffle around, gathering your things as you prepare to disembark and head inside. 
   “It’s been a long day. Head inside and get some rest everyone. Turn your paperwork into me tomorrow morning and I’ll get it to Fury” Hill states before heading off
   T’Challa is the next to move, he has a jet to Wakanda to catch tomorrow afternoon and needs extra rest to get that paperwork done beforehand, “Goodnight Tony, Y/n. Good work today, and if I don’t see you before my flight, it was good to see you”  
   “Goodnight” you and Tony say in unison before heading inside yourselves.
   As the two of you walk through the hall you're stuck by the fact that the tv and light are still on in the living room, something which is unusual for this time of night. You both wordlessly decide to take a peek at what's going on and stop in the doorway.
    Over on the sofa, curled up with each other under a blanket sit Natasha and Wanda. A Bond movie plays on the tv and even at your distance you can tell by the way the Russians lips move that she's softly quoting every line. Wanda looks up at her with a fondness before linking one of her hands with Nats and her attention returns to the screen. You smile at their cute interaction, but it doesn’t quite reach your eyes.
   A deep ache fills your chest as you watch them, and you sigh. You’d give anything to be able to join them, but you can’t. Not in the way you want to at least. And you’re tired of pretending that you don’t want more with them. You've had to withdraw because only being their friend while they held your heart, it hurt. You know it's nothing personal, nor is it their fault, but you couldn’t continue to do that to yourself. You hope one day, when your heart has righted itself, that they’ll understand. But until then, solitude is best.
   “Well” you whisper, “Glad to see Nat still likes Bond. Goodnight Tony”
   You go to turn away but his firm hand stops you, “Are you really so oblivious?”
   Your brows furrow, “What are you talking about?”
   “Kid, it's past midnight and they're in the living room. They have a tv in their room, and you and I both know that's where they always watch their movies.”
   You shrug, “Maybe they just wanted a change of scenery”
   He exasperatedly runs a hand through his hair, “Christ sake kid, they waited there for you.”
   “Huh? Why would they do that?”
   He sighs, “Because they miss you, and they didn’t get to spend the day with you, so they at least wanted to be here to greet you once you got home. They wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt.”
   “Oh.” you pause, feeling guilty for hurting them with your absence while also feeling grateful for their care, “I better not keep them waiting then. Goodnight Tony”
   “Night Y/n” he says, with the hope that finally everyone's confessions would come to light tonight
   You slowly approach the couple, feeling guilty you were about to disrupt their movie despite knowing they waited up for you. In the end you don’t need to interrupt them as your movements end up catching the Sokovians attention and her eyes light up.
   “Malysh(baby), you're back!” 
   Nats head quickly turns in your direction, but her smile fades slightly as she notices the dirt and small scrapes that adorn your forearms and face, “Are you hurt?”
   You shake your head, “No. Just some normal bumps and bruises is all.”
   They both frown at your statement and Wanda quickly untangles herself from her girlfriend in order to approach you. Her hand gently trails across a bruise on your cheek before grabbing onto your hand and she looks back to Nat to receive a nod.
   “Let's get you cleaned up, ok?” You're too tired to say no so you dumbly nod and follow her to the couples bedroom, with Natasha right behind you.
   “Sit down kotenok(kitten)” she instructs, her tone softer than what you're used to
   You do as you're told, relaxing into the small sofa in their room as Wanda heads into the bathroom and Natasha rifles through their closet. You unintentionally doze off as you wait and the two women briefly contemplate allowing you a small nap before they decide that you’d be better off and more comfortable once cleaned up and out of your uniform.
  “Y/n…Wake up sweet girl” Wanda coos, as she gently shakes you
   Your eyes strain to open, “Sorry guys”
   “It’s alright. You've had a long day.” Wanda says, sitting down beside you, “Let's get you clean.”
   She brings the washcloth up to your face first and Nat smiles as she watches you practically melt at the feeling. The brunette softly scrubs your face, careful to not agitate any of the small scrapes as she rubs the sweat and dirt from your face. 
   “There we go. I knew your beautiful face was under all that grime” 
   You blush slightly, and you know with as close as both women are that they've seen it, yet neither tease you for it, “Thanks Wans”
   She smiles and nods, “Give me your arm”
   You do so, watching with sleepy eyes as she cleans your left forearm before moving onto your right one. Youd been so focused on her movements that you hadn’t realized Nat had momentarily left in order to prepare the bed for them.
   “She all clean, detka(baby)?”
   Wanda nods, “Yup. Clean and ready for bed.”
   You assume that's your queue to leave and shuffle as you prepare to stand but the redhead is quick to stop you, “Woah, easy there. We haven't gotten our Y/n time for what feels like ages, so we’re claiming now while you're too tired to protest. Here, go change”
   You look down to see that she's handing you an extra pair of her pajamas and your stomach erupts with butterflies, “Thanks Nat.”
   The two share a smile as you head off to their bathroom to change and Nat helps the younger girl off the sofa, “Go ahead and get into bed detka(baby)”
   When you emerge from the bathroom you find Wanda suggled into her side of the bed while Nat sits on the edge of her side. The Russian can’t help the smile that spreads across her face, seeing you in her clothes has her heart speeding up in her chest. 
  “Well, goodnight guys” you tell them, taking a step forward only to be stopped by Nats hands grabbing yours
   “Where do you think you're going, pretty girl?”
   “I-  I uh, the couch?” you stutter out, mentally slapping yourself for becoming so flustered by her words
  Wandda frowns as she sits up, you never used to mind sleeping in their bed with them on movie nights, when had that changed? Why are you so distant now?
   “Y/n?” she hesitates, “Have Tasha and I upset you?”
   “What? No. No, of course not. Everything is fine” you stress, but Nat defeatedly drops your hands as her expression turns sad
   “Everythings not fine, Y/n. This is the first time we’ve been able to spend any time alone with you in nearly a month. You've been avoiding us, and it hurts”
   “Just please tell us what we did so we can fix it.” Wanda practically begs, “We miss having you around. We miss you.”
   “You guys haven’t done anything. I promise.”
   “It doesn’t feel that way” the Russian mumbles, and your guilt returns ten fold
   “Ok. I probably should have said something sooner, but i didn't know how” you sigh, “I still don’t, but you guys don’t deserve to be left wondering”
   You stand there for a moment, nervously picking at your fingers as you try to figure out what words are best to use to explain everything. But your anxiety is getting the better of you, and you can’t blame it. I mean how are you supposed to tell your two best friends, who are a couple, that you love them.
   Wandas eyes widened as unbeknownst to you, your thoughts had become incredibly loud. But she doesn’t want you to panic, and your anxiety is already quite high, so she decides to not let it be known that she’d heard you. Instead she gets out of bed and slowly approaches you, grasping your hands with hers once she's close enough.
   “Whatever it is Y/n, you can tell us. I promise it’ll be ok” she assures, squeezing your hands for added emphasis.
      Heat rushes to your cheeks as you think about the prospect of saying the words out loud, but the way Wanda reassures you gives you some courage, “I um, I-  I love you both. In a more than friends kind of way.”
   “Oh kotenok(kitten)” Natasha coos as you glue your eyes to the floor, and she quickly gets to her feet to join the two of you. She grabs your chin and tilts it up so you're looking at her, “That's something you never had to hide from us. Because we feel the same, don’t we detka(baby)?”
   Your eyes widen in disbelief and you look to the other woman for confirmation, “You guys love me?”
   “We do, we love you Y/n” Wanda admits, smiling wide
   “So very much” Natasha adds, wearing a matching smile of her own and she can wait no longer, “Can we kiss you?”
    You eagerly nod and she brings her lips to yours. It's everything you thought it would be, fierce and full of passion and it quickly takes your breath away. As soon as she pulls away from you Wanda replaces her on your lips. Her kiss too is just as you expected, tender and full of love. Once it ends the brunette pulls you into a hug, which Nat joins.
   You let out a happy relieved laugh as their arms wrap around your body and you easily sink into them. They can feel just how exhausted you are, so despite the wonderful discovery the three of you have made, they know that their first priority is letting you get your needed rest.
   “Come on malysh(baby)” Wanda says, breaking up the group hug, “It’s very late and you need sleep”
  “She's right. We can talk more about this tomorrow” Nat adds, ushering you over to the bed
  This time you don’t argue, you climb right in and get settled in your spot in the middle of the bed so you can be between the two of them. Wanda happily joins you, snuggling closely as she pulls you against her. Nat smiles as she joins you but instead of snuggling close she leans on her elbow, her other hand cupping your face.
   She gives you another kiss, “Love you”
   “Love you too Natty” you sleepily mumble, making her heart swell. You then turn to Wanda to let her have a kiss, “Love you Wans”
   “Love you too, sweetheart” she whispers, brushing a hand through your hair, “Sleep well”
   You end up falling asleep before they even finish pulling the covers up over you. They both scoot closer, each wrapping an arm across your midsection to ensure you remain close.
   “Our pretty girl” Nat mumbles as she nuzzles her face against your neck
   Wanda does the same on your other side, “All ours”
Taglist: @wandaromamoff69 @when-wolves-howl @danveration @sheneonromanoff @sayah13 @likefirenrain @nighttime-dreaming @just-a-torn-up-masterpiece @chaoticevilbakugo @crystalstark02 @wackymcstupid @lovelyy-moonlight @blackwidow-3 @mistressofinsomnia @that-one-gay-mosquito @yomamagf @yourfavdummy @justarandomreaderxoxo @scoutlp23-blog @whoischanelle15 @lissaaaa145 @eline03 @wizardofstories@imthenatynat @marvelonmymind @fluffyblanketgecko @bitch-616 @dakotastormm @zoomdeathknight
869 notes · View notes
stayinhellevator · 7 days
Text
Parallels
Tumblr media
"I love you but not in that way"
Synopsis: Love had found its way into Seokmin's heart, yet a different kind of love, unrequited and unspoken, lingered in yours.
Pairing: DK x fem!Reader
Genre: Soulmate AU/Angst/Unrequited Love
Word Count: 1890
Warnings: none (I think?!)
Playlist: Not In That Way ~ Sam Smith
<Equation 1> <Equation 2> <Equation 3>
Tumblr media
"You may now kiss the bride."
A thousand times you had imagined this scenario; a thousand times you had planned your wedding with Seokmin; a thousand times you had wanted to be the bride that he was now holding in his arms and kissing so gently as if even a little pressure would break her; an uncountable times you had wished to be his soulmate. And you had spent almost half your life thinking about all the possibilities, all the outcomes and all the calculations of 'what ifs'.
Yet nothing could've prepared you for this moment; the final showdown. There were cheers of congratulations around you as the newly weds bowed in gratitude; everyone was happy; heck, even your parents were applauding in happiness but you couldn't.
God knows you couldn't. You didn't even know how you were able to conjure up the energy to go through the wedding when there was a bile building up in your throat. The weight of an invisible stone on your heart was dragging you at a rapidly growing rate and all you wanted to do was run away and hide in your room but right at that moment, your infuriatingly gorgeous and oblivious childhood best friend, Seokmin waved his hand in your direction, giving you his infamous bright smile that held your heart in a chokehold ever since you began to understand the concept of love and soulmates. A hand that you noticed was entwined with his soulmate's; nevertheless you did what you had managed to perfect around him and ignored the pang in your chest, smiling back at him.
As you watched him exchange pleasantries with the guests, alongside his wife, a tear finally managed to escape the confines of your eyes. This felt like an unfavorable ending of your favourite book; the one that you desperately wanted to change. Alas! Destiny, the author, wouldn't even let you appeal your case for you were never meant to be the main character of this story.
You had known this when your soulmark appeared on your tenth birthday and it seemed different from Seokmin's. You remembered crying in your mother's arms for, to the ten year old you, it didn't make sense that Seokmin and you weren't soulmates because of course you were; after all you were attached to the hip ever since you were born and you both loved each other, didn't you?
Turns out, you were the only rider of that romance train for Seokmin was happy that you two received your soulmarks and that there were people out there waiting for the two of you. He didn't seem to be upset that you didn't have identical marks; he never was. And that's when he first broke your heart.
But God were you unable to stop loving him when his very essence brightened up even the darkest corners of your mind. Even now, you weren't able to move your eyes off his figure, as he practically buzzed with joy, an energy you'd never seen in him; his eyes brimming with adoration towards his wife; his smile brighter than all of the chandeliers in the venue; his steps light and bouncy as if he was the wind itself.
Later in the night, in the safety of your room, when you're empty after pouring your heart out, you'd be disgusted at yourself for wishfully staring at a man who belonged with someone else, a married man, someone's soulmate but right now, you can't stop. You want to paint his picture forever in the back of your mind, for one last time. Then, never again.
Your heart constricted with all the love you had for this man, your best friend, the love of your life who had already put his heart in someone else's hands. How were you ever going to forget about him and move on?
"You alright?"
A hand placed itself on your shoulder and without even turning back, you knew Hansol's otherwise indifferent face was twisted with concern for you because he knew; had always known how down bad you were for Seokmin, even though he joined your duo years later. He always expressed his surprise as to how Seokmin could not know about your feelings; he was even convinced that Seokmin was aware but chose not to acknowledge it but who knows? You were never curious for the answers after all. It was embarrassing enough that even a stranger could detect your feelings for him but he couldn't.
"Do I look okay?"
An exhausted sigh was your reply as if he understood and matched your desolation and quietly stood beside you to watch the newly weds have their first dance. A constant throbbing in your head made you want to smash your head against a wall and knock yourself out but you stood quietly, fisting your palm, as if trying to ground yourself.
"Why does fate gotta be so cruel? It's even hurrying the time against us. It must really hate us huh?"
A nonchalant chuckle escaped him as he tried to sound unaffected but you knew him as well as he knew you, if not more and you turned to face him, a tick in his jaw as he tried to stay stoic.
"I've had all the time in this world with Seokmin, at least as much as I could've had, until I couldn't cheat the fate anymore but you have one last night. So, go on, don't waste it on me. I'll still be there in your life but she won't."
His head snapped towards you as his eyes suddenly watered, making you smile at him with all the empathy in your heart for the third of your trio. Who knew better than you how much he was hurting? He gulped his emotions down before nodding at you in something that would always remain between the two of you and you watched him escape the hall with his lover on his toes.
At least, one of you was having a good night.
"Did you really think you could escape the dance with the man of the hour? I'm really hurt."
Oh if only he knew what hurt was.
You could only follow him as he held you and guided you towards the dance floor, both of your movements as naturally flowing as they could because everything was easy with him. You two worked like two peas in a pod, like bread and butter.
"The man of the hour was too busy tonight and I didn't want to gatekeep him."
You swallowed the lump in your throat before replying to him, not wanting to ruin the happiest day of his life. His playful eyes shone with mirth, before twirling you and bringing you back around.
"I could never be too busy for my best friend, you should know that."
Ah! Of course, you should know that, shouldn't you?
Blinking back the building moisture in your eyes, you nodded in agreement before pressing your lips in what you could only, a smile.
"Are you happy Minnie? Was it everything you ever dreamt of?"
You asked gently, wanting a confirmation to appease your broken heart, though you knew, his answer would be futile, because his shining eyes already gave you the answers you were looking for. And just like that, his face broke out in a breathtaking smile that used to be your home, your refuge.
"I'm on top of the world, like I don't even have words to tell you how I'm feeling right now. If I went on to describe how happy I am today, it'll probably take years for me to accurately put my feelings into words."
His eyes moved from yours to his soulmate, as if unable to detach from hers as yours to his face, a cruel magnet truly; and his voice softened with so much love that you had desperately wanted for yourself all these years.
"She's so pretty, so divine, that I feel unworthy of her. I can't believe I get to love her as my soulmate. I can't imagine a life without her. How have I ever lived a life without her in it?"
The tears that you were holding back ultimately started flowing down your cheeks as you heard him. If only you could have half of this devotion, you'd be delirious. He loved her so much. God, how were you ever going to recover from his words that were permanently going to scar your memories.
"I don't even wanna find out. I have her and that's more than enough for me. She's everything that I've ever dreamt of and more."
He shook his head, as if bringing himself out of a trance and faced you, only to be concerned on seeing you crying. He cupped your face, wiping your cheeks, a small frown on his face and you immediately hit yourself in your head. How could you be so selfish and worry him on his wedding? Your feelings are yours alone and not his concern.
You broke your heart loving a man destined to love someone else and it was your burden to bear not his.
"Hey! What happened? Why are you crying?"
You shook your head trying to both shake off his concerns and mustering up some courage to answer him without breaking down in his arms.
"It's nothing I'm just so happy for you. I got emotional seeing you all grown up and married and so in love. I'm so happy that you're happy Minnie."
His eyes softened at your words and he immediately pulled you into a hug, still softly swaying to the music.
"I hope you find your happiness too. I'll be right there when you find your soulmate and get married and have lots and lots of kids with them."
"I hope so too."
You really did, it was wishful thinking but you really hoped for his words to come true. You pressed your face on his shoulders, hiding your cries and you tightened the hug just a little before taking a deep breath and patting on his back and stepping back from his hold.
"I've taken a lot of your time. Now go back to your wife."
You watched how his frowning face smoothened before he gave a small pat on your head and walked towards his wife and pulled her into a kiss.
You found comfort in the fact that even though Seokmin was not meant to be yours, he'd never truly be away from you. He might not love you but a part of you would always love him and your love for him was enough for you.
You took a shaky breath as you realised you were about to close a big chapter of your life and put a lock on it, only to never open it again.
Seokmin and you might not be soulmates but you were platonic soulmates and it was the one thing no one could snatch from you.
You gave a half hearted smile to your mother, who looked at you with a knowing look on her face, before walking out of the hall, content with the bittersweet truth of your life.
You could always love him from afar and that's a privilege no one could ever take from you. It was your burden to bear alone after all.
Tumblr media
©stayinhellevator: Please don't repost, translate or copy my work on any platform.
Tumblr media
Read On Wattpad
52 notes · View notes
motownfiction · 1 year
Text
doomed voyage
Sam should have known it would be a doomed voyage from the very start. That’s what driving long distances with Charlie is always like. But he made him a promise when he was eighteen, and two and a half years later, he’s keeping it. Sam is, contrary to popular belief, a man of his word. He changes his mind about everything else, from how long his hair should be to his favorite flavor of ice cream. But promises to his siblings are set in stone.
It’s the day after Thanksgiving, and Charlie wants to get his shopping done early. He has ideas for all the things he wants to buy for Carrie: books, nail polish, and a really nice perfume. Sam’s pretty happy to take him. He doesn’t have a girlfriend to buy for (though he constantly thinks of things to get for Steph, even now, more than two years after their breakup), but he likes walking around in the mall. It makes him think about possibilities. Maybe one of these days, he’ll combine a music store with a pretzel stand. He’s not sure what he’d call it, but that’s what the mall is for: shopping for inspiration.
Charlie wants to go all the way to Briarwood. When Sam asks him why, he turns a little red and mumbles something about how he’s less likely to run into anyone from school if they go to Ann Arbor. Sam sighs, but he goes along with it. Charlie’s always been afraid of running into people from school. Sam was never crazy about it, either. It’s just that it’s different with Charlie. Where Sam was concerned about having people from St. Catherine’s in the business of his weekends, Charlie is afraid of having to share small talk with people he finds boring (or worse, inferior). And Sam should have told him to get tough, to get used to insipid conversations about the Advent wreath at school Mass and buying Duran Duran records in your free time. He knows that now.
It’s just that now, he’s standing on the shoulder of I-94, shivering in his shoes with a car that needs a jumpstart. He wasn’t worrying about that before.
Sam watches as Charlie sits in the front seat of the car, warm from his head to his feet, bobbing his head along with “Dig That Crazy Santa Claus” on the radio. He never even thought about leaving the car to help. Sam is hunched over the hood of the car with a stranger who introduced himself only as “Mr. George,” trying to figure out how to make the car go again. It’s not often Sam stands around wishing he’d taken his father seriously when he tried to teach him how to jumpstart a car, but in the cold November air with an oblivious brother on the passenger’s side, he wants a time machine desperately.
They’ll make it to the mall today if it’s the last thing Sam ever does. Maybe it’s weird that Charlie doesn’t want to go shopping anywhere near the house, and maybe it’s shitty for him to stay in the car while Sam fixes the problem with a stranger. But years ago, Sam made a promise to his little brother. And if there’s one thing Sam knows about himself, it’s that he loves his little brother … that he’ll do anything for him, even if it means getting stuck on the interstate.
He looks through the car window one last time to remind himself of that. Charlie’s still dancing in his seat. Sam lets out another sigh.
That’s enough.
(part of @nosebleedclub february challenge -- day xxvii! i’m trying here, haha)
0 notes
Text
The Way You Make Me Feel (Bucky Barnes x Reader)
[Marvel-Masterlist]
Summary: Steve sent Bucky & you on a mission together. Nothing special, you worked well together, after all. This time, you had to go undercover. Pretending to be a couple. Your frustration after an unsuccessful night needed to be released. Bucky had something in mind.
Words: 3,137
Warnings: 18+, NSFW, smut, oral sex, fingering, multiple orgasms, protected sex bc Buck’s a responsible person, this is pure filth, I don’t know what else you want me to say…, language, undercover mission gone wrong, I wanted to write angst??? What happened? …oopsie? I’ll go take a cold shower now.
If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤
Bucky Barnes. Used to be the Winter Soldier. Now the White Wolf. Muscular body. Broad shoulders. That metal arm of his that did unspoken things to you. Basically, he had ruined every other man for you. Unfortunately, he was not yours. He never would be yours. Coworkers. You were coworkers. Nothing more, nothing less.
The teasing was a given. Both, Bucky & you, had personalities that made it impossible to not flirt with each other. It was all playful, of course. Nothing would ever come out of it. Though, you would have lied if you said that you did not wish for it to change. His strut so manly, so strong. Thank God he was oblivious to how your body reacted whenever he was around. Those accidental touches. His hand touching your lower back. Everything set your body on fire. If it was not enough for him to be so hot, of course he had the most charming smiles to top everything off. It was unfair.
It was even worse that the entire team had picked up on the way you eyed Bucky. How whenever he entered the room, your eyes could not fixate on anything else. How your smile got wider whenever he talked. No matter how hard you tried, you fell for him. Harder & harder each day. The chemistry between you guys was no secret. Which was why you usually got teamed up with Bucky to complete missions together. But that was all there ever was. Constant flirting, teasing. Anything beyond that did not exist.
Another mission with him. Undercover. Your absolute favorite. You would have been fine with Sam or anyone else for that matter. But Bucky? Things were bound to get complicated. It was inevitable. Posing as a couple? Really? As if things were not bad enough already. A couple usually shared a room. You understood that. The thing was that you guys were not together. Not outside of this mission. So you had to deal with your emotions for him while being in the exact same room. With one bed. Yeah, things were starting great. After finishing up here, you would kill Steve for sure. He knew about your crush on Bucky. Probably the reason he liked to send you somewhere together. Apparently, it was incredibly exhausting to watch you guys dance around your feelings. You were a lot of things. A dancer was not one of them. More like an observer. Watching from afar to avoid stupid mistakes. That was more fitting.
Gala number one was over. Without any luck. There was no new information & nothing that brought you closer to your target. Just hours of unnecessary pretending & fake laughing. That was exhausting. Especially if Bucky had to be close to you all night long. Always an arm around your waist. A kiss on the cheek for effect. If it were not for this stupid mission, you would have enjoyed every single second of it. Sadly, it was an act. That thought alone broke your heart into a million pieces. Not even you were sure when your feelings for Bucky started. It was like you were thrown into ice cold water all of a sudden & now you had to deal with the aftermath.
Unsuccessful missions always left you frustrated. This type of frustration that let you overthink every little detail. What if you did this? What if you did not do that? What if, what if, what if. Mind being filled with so many thoughts, it was barely possible to stay sane. Even worse, you still had a couple of nights ahead of you. If you did not finish this job then you should not head back. Great. If all nights turned out like this, you would throw yourself out of a window. No, really. You were exhausted.
His body language revealed how stressed he was as well. Completely tense, clenched jaw. He did not like it any more than you did. Truthfully, he was even angrier than you. While the two of you worked well together, when things did not go your way, it could get pretty heated real fast. Words thrown at each other’s heads. Blaming the other one for that particular thing because if that did not happen, then you would have finished this mission already. It took a few hours until the tension died down again. An apology later & you were back to normal.
Not today, it seemed. The two of you were worse after that gala. Maybe it was because you felt uncomfortable all night. Maybe it was because you had to stay here for however long. Maybe it was just him. Him acting like a shy gentleman. Like the husband obsessed with his wife. Wanting to show her off whenever the chance was given. Tonight, you were her. You were his wife. You were the one he wanted to show off. But you were not really her. Just a fraction, if anything. He pretended & so did you. At least that was what you told yourself. Deep down, it was so much more than just pretending. It was like giving in to a craving you had had for years. And while it was not much, it had to do. Had to be enough. Because that was the most you would ever receive. The most he would ever give you. How you wished this were not the case.
So why the hell was he staring even more intensely than usual? Why the hell did he eye you up & down like a hungry animal waiting for the perfect timing to attack its prey? Why the hell did his hands clench into fists? And why the hell did it affect you so much? So much, in fact, that your thighs pressed together involuntarily. An action that did not go unnoticed by him. Standing up, flexing his muscles. Eyes that looked darker in the barely lit room. His never leaving yours when he approached you carefully. He took his time. You knew he did it to give you enough time to escape this situation if you really wanted to. You did not, though. For once, you wanted to give in. For once, you wanted your body to fully feel. Feel him. All of him.
His body was only mere inches away from yours. The exposed skin on your back pressing against the cold wall of your hotel room. The dress did not cover much. Enough to keep the others interested. And apparently to keep him interested, too. Both of his arms came up to rest next to your head. By now, he was caging you with his entire body. An action that let goosebumps appear. You breathed the same air. It seemed like the time stood still. Everything that kept on was you & him. In that hotel room. Against the wall. If he decided to lower his head just a little, your lips would be touching. He did not. No. If this was about to happen then he wanted to take his time with you. Tease you. Hear you. Feel you. Your breathing picked up its pace. He had not even touched you yet but you were already reacting like this. His smirk showed you how much he truly enjoyed having you putty in his hands. One of his legs moved slightly. Until his knee opened your legs slowly. His thigh pressed against your center. Barely, barely enough pressure to give you any form of satisfaction. Yet, you could not help but whimper at his touch. To shut you up, he pressed his soft lips against yours in a passionate kiss. There was no hint of gentleness behind his actions. Just purely heated with a desperation that made you weak at the knees. You melted into his touch, your hands roaming all over his chest. Any way to bring him closer to your body. His metal hand found itself at your waist while his other one cupped your cheek. An almost tender action that balanced out his rough & relentless kiss. It was like he was your drug & now that you got a taste of him, you would never let go again.
When his hands brushed over your shoulders to push the straps of your dress down, your breath hitched in your throat. His mouth went down to your neck, sucking & gently biting every now & then. You moaned when he reached a certain spot. Staying at this place, he focused solely on it all while pushing your gown further down your curves. The moment it reached the floor, he took a step back to take in your full beauty. To him, you were the most gorgeous woman he had ever laid eyes on. Not wasting another second, he dropped to his knees in front of you. So close to where you wanted him the most. Where you needed him. His hands grabbed your hips tightly. It would sure leave bruises but you knew you would love looking at them after waking up. Because he did that to you. Kissing his way down your belly, he made sure to focus on his task. His eyes opened when he reached your panties. Silently asking for permission. You were too far gone already so you eagerly nodded at him, threading your hands through his soft locks. A slight push earned you a groan. One, that went straight to your pussy. But he would not give in that easily. After all, he had waited so long for this to happen. He would savor it in great detail. His flesh hand kneaded one of your breasts, rolling your nipples between his fingers. You were in a state of bliss & he had barely touched you. That was enough to let him know what he did to you. Before you could even process what he was doing, he pulled your panties off in one swift motion & slid his metal fingers through your slit. The coldness of it made your excitement grow even more. Usually, you would feel embarrassed by how wet you were. But this was Bucky. With him, it was different. An approving hum coming from him was enough confirmation. You had no need to be ashamed.
His fingers worked slowly, almost lazily. He knew how to push your buttons. By the way he touched you, so skilled, with such certainty, it was like he knew your body better than you did. Bucky encouraged you to be noisy, he wanted to hear you. The sweet moans, the whimpers, that he caused. He was the reason for them. Finally, he found your clit & put more pressure on it. Rubbing it in a steady motion. You could feel your orgasm building up already. You wanted to warn him, wanted to let him know that you needed a tiny bit more. He got the message when you pulled his hair tighter. While his finger stayed on your bundle of nerves, his head dipped lower, using his tongue to eat you out. And holy shit. That man knew what he was doing. He was so skilled, you assumed he had had tons of women before you. Right now, you could not care less. Your entire focus was on his ministrations & how his tongue entering you mixed with his fingers on your clit brought you higher & higher. Gripping his hair harder made him groan into you. That was all it took for you to let go. Your thighs shook & if it were not for Bucky steadying you, you would have fallen to the floor. For a few seconds, your vision was all blurry. That had never happened before. All the people who you had been with had never managed to satisfy you quite like this.
Again, his lips met yours. This time, you could taste yourself on them. And if it were possible, it turned you on even more. Both of his hands went to the back of your thighs, lifting you up with ease. He walked over to the bed & laid you down gently. All while his lips stayed locked onto yours. He propped himself up on his arms in order not to crush you with his weight. It was only then when you realized that he was still entirely dressed. Which was not really fair, considering that you were completely bare in front of him. Your hands went to open the buttons of his shirt but since you were still shaky after that first mind blowing orgasm he gave you, you could not quite succeed with that. A low chuckle escaped Bucky & his face left yours to help you out. His frantic actions showed you how he did not want to waste any more time. You barely had enough time to appreciate his body in its full glory. His muscles. His soft skin. Bucky knew what he wanted & he wanted it now.
He topped you, this time you opened your legs for him to slip in between. The kisses grew more & more passionate. But before you could get lost into it once again, he pulled away from you entirely. Your eyes opened, concern written all over your features. Bucky shushed you before you had the chance to ask if you did something wrong. Crossing the room in no time, he came back with a condom in his hand. The wink he sent you made you breathe easier. So he was not about to leave you. Opening the package, he took one of his arms to stroke over his thick cock. Sitting up, you kissed him while taking the condom from him. Your hand grabbed his wrist & you replaced his with yours, mimicking his previous motions. He groaned lowly & you smirked at his reaction. Twisting your hands just right, you picked up your pace. By the way his breath got heavier, you assumed that he was enjoying it. Suddenly, he pushed you away from him. Not hard, just so you would get the message. You knew what he was getting at. Giving him another short peck, you rolled the condom on & laid back down on the mattress. He followed your motions & set himself between your legs again. One arm on each side of your head as to not hurt you. His tip teased your entrance. Slowly sliding up & down to gather you slickness. Whenever he touched your clit, a moan left your mouth. That went on for a while. After all, Bucky made it his job to tease you. When the whimpers got too much, he asked you a simple question. In that deep, lust-filled voice of his.
“What do you want, doll?” you knew what he was trying to do. He wanted you to beg for him. But you were not that type of person. Not usually. Bucky was the exception. And he only had to ask that question twice before you gave in, the frustration clearly audible.
“Please, Buck. Please, I need you.” that did the job. In one swift motion, he entered you, filling you up so painfully right. That familiar, delicious sting. He stilled for a second. While he knew that he wanted to make this rough, he did not want to hurt you in any way. So he let you adjust to his size. Only when you moved your hips slightly & when you moaned out his name did he start his thrusts.
At first, he set a steady pace. Long, deep thrust that made your breasts bounce in the sweetest way possible. Not once did he close his eyes. No, he wanted to remember everything about this. Everything about you. You being under him. It did not take long for you to beg him for more. Giving in, he quickened his thrusts. Now, much deeper than before. He reached places inside of you you did not even know existed. The entire bed was moving & for once, you did not care if anybody heard you. All that mattered was the man on top of you. The man who made you feel like this. Like you were a goddess that needed to be devoured. During this moment, you felt like the prettiest woman on Earth. Bucky made you feel like that. You hated your body’s reaction to him. Because you could already feel your second orgasm building up. You did not want this to end so soon. You did not want to let go. But you knew you could not hold it back. Not much longer. Not if Bucky kept going like this. Somehow trying to signal that you were close, Bucky got an idea. His entire weight was now on his right arm while his metal one made its way between your bodies. Before he touched you there, he gave you an order. One that you could not help but obey.
“Open your eyes, doll. I wanna see you cum for me.” he said it in such a sexy way, barely above a whisper, but loud enough for you to understand that he was serious. So you did. You opened your eyes, locking them with his. That was when his metal fingers started rubbing fast circles around your clit. The noises coming from you got louder & louder. You were so close. When his thrusts did not slow down, you knew you would be there soon. The last bit it took came from Bucky, lips brushing your over your cheek, breathing another order in your ear.
“Cum for me. Yeah, that’s it. Cum all around me.” you had never heard something so hot coming from him. His words brought you over the edge. For the second time tonight, you saw dark spots clouding your vision. Bucky watching you cum under him made him reach his high as well. He bit your shoulder when he did. The pain mixed beautifully with the ecstasy you were currently experiencing.
He stilled inside of you, the two of you breathing heavily. You had never felt this satisfied after sleeping with someone. Slipping out of you, he rolled onto his side, propping his head onto his arm. There it was again. His charming smile. While he was a shy, polite gentleman outside of this room, he sure as hell did not hold back in bed. And you were glad that he did not. Smiling at him, too, he leaned in one more time for another kiss. This time, it was soft. Delicate. Not like the ones you shared only a few minutes ago. This sweet, romantic moment got interrupted when Bucky gripped your hips & rolled you on top of him so you were straddling his lap.
“I’m not done with you, doll.” yeah, it was about to be a long, tiring night.
Published (04/07/2021) by Cathy
Tags: @sweetserendipity65, @buckysleftarm420, @longinusfilibuster, @kathsheaven, @your-local-awkward-barista, @xfeliciahardyx (thanks for your support <3)
282 notes · View notes
Note
If Bella was somehow bitten somehow and woke up alone during New Moon, but the Cullens didn't find her (I don't know if this is still 'Edward mercy kills Bella' territory but if it is then maybe her gift knows this and starts blocking Alice) and she became a nomad, would she still do the diet and if so for how long?
This is shockingly in the realm of possibility and not necessarily in the land of Edward mercy killing Bella.
Though there are some dangers Bella would have to avoid somehow for survival.
Bella is Bitten Alone in New Moon
We have one vampire who meets Bella during New Moon and another who with very little difference in the timeline would have run across her: Laurent and Victoria.
In the case of Laurent, he and Bella have a chat, he decides Bella smells delicious and he'll spare her the pain of being slowly murdered by Victoria, and just as he decides to go for it he gets run down and eaten by giant wolves.
Bella survives her vampire encounter.
In the case of Victoria, she never really gets close enough to do damage until the fight between Edward and Victoria and Riley and Seth in Eclipse.
So we have a few ways this could go:
Laurent's a few seconds ahead of Sam and company. He manages to get a good bite in and doesn't crush Bella on impact. He's run off by the wolves and Bella survives.
The problem here is that Bella has now been bitten and there's no coming back for her. It's a tragedy, and the wolves will feel a shared sense of failure and burden that they failed to save her, but she's dead anyway. They have to kill her before she fully turns.
Bella's gift, while powerful, doesn't appear to help in this kind of situation. Though, that said, in her dire need it could suddenly give her the ability to project illusions like we see in Renesmee. Doesn't seem to be how Bella's gift typically rolls, but hey, this is her darkest hour.
Otherwise, Jake could pull his alpha move much earlier in order to save Bella's life. He ignores Sam's order, flees with the turning Bella, and dumps her in the wilderness somewhere with a note from Jake that she must never return to Forks. She wakes up alone, only guessing though not knowing what Jake has done for her, and stares blankly at the wilderness.
If Victoria catches up to Bella, well, it's not looking good. All too likely, Bella dies painfully, and Victoria leaves a video tape of the entire ordeal in the Cullen house for when they eventually return (as they surely will).
Though, that said, the ease with which Victoria accomplishes this and the complete lack of Cullen intervention could catch her off guard. Perhaps... Edward doesn't actually give a rat's ass. That says terrible things about James' needless death, but Victoria's holding this girl hostage. She will die, in the most painful manner imaginable, and the Cullens aren't there.
Victoria might turn Bella out of pity or else turn her as she figures out, in part from Bella, that Bella becoming a vampire is Edward's worst case scenario. However, in that case, it's unlikely Victoria would abandon Bella, so Bella wouldn't be on her own.
Which, I think for this post, makes Jake's alpha sacrifice the most likely path. He dumps Bella's half-vampire body somewhere in nowhere Canada.
Bella After the Bite
Being dumped in the wilderness helps a lot. For one, Bella already has unbelievable control, for another this is Edward's penguin scenario. There is no one else out here for her to eat even if she wanted to.
So, following the diet is easy.
And it's something she'd very much wish to do. Bella sees the world of vampires divided into two types of vampire: the good Cullen vampires who don't eat people and the bad vampires who, well, eat people.
This left such a mark on Bella that she has very little idea of what a vampire even is.
Bella would be horrified at herself if she became a bad vampire. In wanting vampirism she wanted the vampirsim she sees in the Cullens. Bella might be miserable and alone, without a friend in the world, but she would be horrified to choose anything other than the Cullen way of life.
At least, at first.
The Return of the Cullens
There's a few paths for Bella after she's dumped in the middle of nowhere.
Alice sees that Bella's become a vampire, an abandoned newborn, and is wandering aimlessly around the wilderness somewhere. Even though Edward has forbidden contact, this is probably enough to motivate Alice who was genuinely worried.
She likely goes behind Edward's back and tries to find Bella with Jasper and possibly the rest of the Cullens.
Edward, of course, is still in Rio being a miserable saint for leaving precious human Bella.
Eventually, they manage to find her, and there's a lot of miscommunication, very hurt feelings, and heartfelt apologies even from Rosalie because look what happened to this poor girl. Though they each, either reluctantly or more enthusiastically, agreed to leave this was not what they had in mind.
Bella forgives them quite readily, as she did in canon, because she has the self-esteem of a thimble. The Cullens are awed and very grateful, Rosalie would never have forgiven them for this.
It probably takes them both a) a while to decide how best to tell Edward and break the news to him b) a while to get a hold of Edward because he's ignoring all their phone calls.
Eventually they do, it's a shit show, for the purpose of this post we'll say he does not mercy kill Bella. He might actually be feeling too guilty for that. Instead he grovels on the ground constantly, begging Bella's forgiveness, and refuses to enter a relationship with her because he's unworthy.
This undoubtedly upsets Bella, because she's also unworthy and Edward knows it and doesn't love her, but that's not the point of this meta.
In this world, the Cullens keep Cullening after picking Bella up, Bella's adopted into the fold and made Edward's twin sister due to looking the most like him (which, of course, makes them look actually incestuous in high school to add to the Cullen mystique).
With the support of the Cullens, living the Cullen lifestyle, and having the control that Bella has there's no question of ever leaving the diet.
Bella stays on the wagon.
Bella Seeks Out the Denali
Alice is successful and doesn't see Bella's future for whatever reason. Edward will be so proud. Bella is left alone in Canada to eat moose.
Eventually, Bella decides that however great being a vampire is, she's lonely and miserable. She wants companionship.
Well, obviously the Cullens hate her, so even if she could find them they probably never want to see her again. But what about the Denali?
Bella's already in Canada, she could head over to the Denali National Park in Alaska, and surely the least she could do is actually introduce herself.
Of course, the coven sounds blonde, hot, aggressively female, and very intimidating. Tanya's history of wanting to bang Edward has Bella feeling very small and worthless. More, the Cullens may have told the Denali all about how stupid and ugly Bella, Edward's current human girlfriend, is and they've all laughed at her.
However, Bella's so desperate for companionship, for some connection back to her old life, that she goes for it.
She makes it to Alaska, wanders around until she eventually finds the Denali coven, and introduces herself. The Denali are weird assholes, but Bella's so oblivious she actually doesn't notice.
That said, they've had their brush with the law, and Tanya doesn't want a newborn running around by herself. Eleazar also gives a truly pompous, awful, speech about compassion to their fellow man. It's unbearable, Bella finds it charming.
They take Bella in, she can be the dark-haired sister. Her control is so good the three single ladies quickly take her clubbing and encourage her to sleep away her troubles with human men.
Bella quickly finds that, when you're on the vampire end of the equation, the relationship with human thing is kind of gross. These people smell like food, are squishy and overly warm, and have the substance of tofu.
Bella feels even worse about her relationship with Edward.
She sleeps with human men anyway so that the Denali sisters won't judge her/will think she's cool.
They're so proud of her.
Regardless, Bella stays on the diet as the Denali follow the diet. She will likely have a few accidents with her human lovers, and will be inconsolable, but the coven will be there to offer comfort and help her get back on the wagon.
Bella stays on the wagon
Bella's Low Self-Esteem Wins and She Becomes a Hermit
Bella can't return to Forks and she's so ugly, stupid and boring that even though she's a vampire if she met anyone new they'd realize how ugly, stupid, and boring she is.
Better to just forsake society altogether and live with moose.
Bella's able to do this for quite a long time. Years even. And it's... fine. But her life has no purpose nor any direction to it.
She becomes tempted by society. How many years has it been? Has the world changed since she left? Has Forks changed? Is Charlie still alive? Is Renee? What about her classmates?
Bella starts travelling and visiting human cities and, thanks to her control, she does very well.
However, it's very likely that one day she'll slip, she takes her control far too much for granted and all it takes is one mistake.
And that's where Bella starts getting into trouble.
She's horrified at first, of course, and that likely doesn't break her. She gets back on the wagon, but the second time it happens...
There are no consequences to her breaking the diet. She has no companions, no one cares. Why is she living in constant agony, every single day, for people who will one day die anyway? Why is Bella choosing to suffer?
As time goes on, as humans start to mean less and less to her and all the humans that she knew when human herself are dead, Bella starts forgetting the reason that the diet seemed so vital to her existence.
At one point, it stops meaning anything at all, it's just Bella pointlessly choosing to live in agony.
Bella falls off the wagon.
TL;DR I think it'd take a while, at least ten years, but if she becomes a solitary nomad, it would inevitably happen.
148 notes · View notes
13uswntimagines · 3 years
Text
Never Enough (Kristie Mewis x Reader)
Tumblr media
Request: mal x little sister!reader where the reader is always hidden behind mal's shadow
Author’s Note: So I really hope you like this (though it deviated slightly from the Request) and good luck to everyone starting their next semester of college!!
Pt. 2
You drummed your fingers absentmindedly on the table in front of you, your knees bouncing rapidly. You had just won the challenge cup (proving to the world that Huston wasn’t just the land of broken toys), the last thing you wanted to do was a press conference, but coach had insisted. At least you had Kristi with you.
She had taken you under her wing the second you had been transferred to Huston, becoming your best friend (though your feelings were more than friendly). She understood what it felt like to be overshadowed and could more easily grasp the fiasco that was Jill Ellis in charge of a roster.
Her hand grasped your thigh, halting its movement, and continuing on with the rest of the vapid reporters’ question without so much as a blink.
You probably should have been paying attention to whatever the fuck the reporters were asking, but honestly sitting back and letting the vet field the question so you could watch her answer was so much more your speed.
They didn’t want to ask you about soccer anyway, they wanted sister drama and you weren’t in the mood to indulge them.
You loved your older sister. You were adamant about that, but you didn’t always like her. You and Mal had never really gotten along, even as children. You were 3 years younger than her, always chasing after her, and always falling short. You had come so close, only to have it all ripped away.
****
3 weeks before the start of the World Cup
You glared at your packed suitcase, fighting the tears that threatened to fall from your eyes. Your fingers clenching and unclenching in a desperate attempt to keep your opportunity from slipping through your fingertips again.
You could still hear coaches' words ringing in your head. You weren’t living up to your last name, you weren’t good enough to wear it for your country.
You shook your head, retiring your attention to your very excited sister (who appeared to be completely oblivious to your distress). Mal and you were polar opposites. She was bubbly while you were shy. She had made it to UCLA while you had barely gotten into Texas A&M.
She paused in front of you, holding 2 celebration outfits for you to choose from in her hands.
“Cheer up, I’m going to the World Cup and your mopeyness is killing my mood,” She scoffed. You had been sulking since you came back from your meeting with coach, and while it was probably hard for you to be excluded, you should be happy that she was gonna get to live out one of her lifelong dreams.
You smiled weekly up at the woman “And I’m going back to Huston to watch you,” you blinked and pointed to the backless dress on the left, swallowing down the comment about how Jill’s teardown of your career had killed your mood too. “That one, Rosie likes you in blue,”
Mal rolled her eyes. She could practically hear your lamenting in her head. Enough was enough. This wasn’t about you, it was about the team. it was about being happy for others even when you didn’t get your way. “So, you weren’t good enough. You want us to win right?”
You shrugged, scratching the back of your neck. Of course, you wanted the team to win, but you had hoped that you would get the chance to help them in France. To have it taken just days before they left hurt more than you could put into words, all because you weren’t as good as your sister. “She said she could only take one of us and she chose you. It stings just a little bit,”
Mal gave you a scathing look. It was annoying how you were always doing what she was doing, how you were always running after her and her friends. She wasn’t happy when you started to play soccer, cause it was her thing. She was excited that the World Cup was going to be her thing. She didn’t want to share it with you, and she didn’t care how immature that sounded.
“Look, I’m a better fit for the squad, and for once in my life I wanna do something without you. Anyway, I’m going to celebrate, don’t wait up,”
The door slammed as she left, and it reverberated through you like the final nail in a coffin. How could she be so cold towards you? How could she agree with Jill? You sniffled once, burying yourself under a pile of blankets, your tears your only company.
****
“Y/n, my next question is for you,” A different reporter said when Kristie finished answering, pulling you back to reality. You sat up in your chair, blinking owlishly at the reporter.
“Oh, um go for it I guess,” You smiled shyly at the reporter, shifting uncomfortably in your seat. Kristie squeezed your thigh when it began to bounce again. You blushed, more from the contact than from being caught daydreaming.
“First, congratulations on the win and being named tournament MVP,” The reporter smiled, and you nodded at her, the red that colored your cheeks making its way up to your ears. Kristie squeezed your leg again, and you brought your fingers down to tangle with hers.
“How did it feel to really get to show off in front of Vlatko Andonovski,” The reporter asked.
You let out a deep breath, buzzing your lips. How did you feel? You had scored 13 goals and brought the underdog team to victory. You didn’t just show off, you had implemented all the things he wanted you too when he called you up for a camp before the Shebelieves cup.
“Good, I felt good at camp, so it was really nice to get to show him how I’ve improved in the last few months while we’ve been quarantined,” You smiled, glancing at Kristie as she began to rub her thumb on the back of your hand comfortingly.
She was nervous when you got called to camp again. Terrified that they would crush you like they had before. Terrified that she wouldn’t be there to help you through the fallout of seeing your sister again for the first time in months.
*****
“You sure you have everything?” The blond midfielder asked for the 15th time since you entered the airport. You smiled softly at the woman, who was shifting foot to foot, bringing your joined hands up to kiss the back of her buckles.“Yeah,” You nodded,  glancing over her shoulder to the taller Mewis sister, who also nodded that you both had everything.
“And you’ll text me when you land and get to the hotel?” Kristie asked, pulling you to a stop and forcing you to face her. You Y/e/c orbs met her worried blue ones.
You rolled your eyes good-naturedly, pulling the woman into you and tucking your head into the crook of her neck.“Yes, mom. I promise. Now give me a hug,”
She huffed, but still wrapped around you tightly and placed a kiss on the crown of your head. “I just care about you kid,”
“I know, and I love you for it,” You mumbled, into your favorite hiding spot. “now I’m gonna go get a coffee before I pass out,” You kissed her cheek before heading off towards the crappy airport Starbucks. She watched you go, fingers twitching by her side. How she wished to tell you that she loved you too (probably in a much different way than you loved her, but still).
“You’ve got it bad,” Sam snorted, patting her sister’s shoulder. She was visiting Kristie, so it was easier for her to get a flight out of Huston anyway, and in the time of her visit, her sister’s feelings for you had become abundantly clear.
She was glad that you had a shoulder to lean on. someone to confide in after your fallout with Mal. Though she had had several words with the younger player, the woman couldn’t seem to grasp your pain. At least her sister could understand it better than anyone, and she was clearly helping you overcome it.
Kristie blushed, shrugging slightly. “Maybe a little,” she hummed. It was hard not too. You were actually quite adorable once you let your walls come down.
Sam smirked (how she didn’t know you felt the same way, Sam would never know) “Does she know?”
The older mewis’s lips formed a thin line and she shook her head “no,”
It was complicated. The two of you were roommates, and you were just beginning to pull yourself together in the wake of Jill Ellis destroying your self-esteem.
She watched you grab your coffee, smiling at the young man behind the counter (who blushed). You had this incredible ability to light up everyone around you, like the sun. Though over the years you had lost some of your sunshine, you were beginning to gain it back. She didn’t want you to lose it again.
“Just keep an eye on her for me, alright? She was really messed up after what happened at the last camp,” Kristie said softly, faintly tearing her eyes away to look at her younger sister.
Sam nodded solemnly. “You know I will Kris,”
She knew how much you meant to her sister, and she would help you through whatever this camp brought, even if that meant keeping one of her best friends in line.
****
“My question is also for you Y/n,” A different reporter said, and you tilted your chin up at him in acknowledgment.
“We know that Mal is currently out with a knee injury, any idea on when she’ll be back with her team, and if that impacts your chances with Vlatko?” He asked, scribbling furiously on a notepad in front of him.
You tilted your head to the side, almost like a puppy. You weren’t abreast to Vlatkos’ plans (only that he seemed to be more attuned and aware than one Jill Ellis), and considering you hadn’t spoken to Mal in months, you were also clueless on her progress.
“Oh um, I have no idea about either of those questions, sorry,” You mumbled, biting your lip and shifting awkwardly in your chair. The man frowned at your answer, his pen pausing on the pad as he studied you over his horned rimmed glasses.
“Do you think you could beat her out for an Olympic roster spot? And if your success here will help your chances of taking her spot on the team?” He tried again, pointing his pen in your direction. Kristie’s thumb tapped the back of your hand again, three little taps, helping you focus and giving you a little bit of comfort.
You smirked at the man, masking your irritation behind a quip. “Again, I have no clue. That stuff is way above my paygrade,”
Kristie’s hand tightened around yours in warning, a reminder that biting a reporter’s head off wouldn’t make you feel better. It wouldn’t make them see that you didn’t want to be compared. It would just give them more ammunition to shoot at you.
“Do you feel overlooked, as you’ve continuously performed better than your sister within the NWSL?” A different reporter pipped in, looking at you expectantly.
You shrugged, trying to ease the tension that had suddenly come over the press tent. “Well, I think my average is helped by me not having to miss games due to national team duties,”
You swore a few of the reporter’s lips ticked up, and the pat on your thigh told you that your midfielder counterpart was pleased with the deflection.
“Do you think you’ll continue to be able to live up to your last name?” The horned rimmed man asked a vicious smirk etched on his face. You flinched slightly.
It was the one fear that plagued you. The one shortcoming that your parents preyed on. That you would never be as good as your sister. That you would never be the Pugh that she was. That you were undeserving of the name.
Kirstie’s arm was around you immediately, shielding your opening and closing mouth from the furiously clicking cameras as she pulled you to stand.
“I think this press conference is over. We’re very excited to have won and it’s time for us to celebrate,” She said stiffly, practically dragging your frozen form through the door towards your locker room.
You stumbled after her, eyes wide as you tried to catch up to what was happening. Your brain was still split between its lament over his you’d never escape your sister’s shadow (no matter how hard you tried) and the feeling of your crush’s arm wrapped tightly around you. It made you feel safe and warm and wanted. She made you feel like you had a place beside her, like how you were feeling was important.
She paused, pinning you against the cool cement wall of the stadium. You stared over her shoulder, adamantly refusing to look her in the eyes. You didn’t want her to see your inner struggle, to know that despite all her efforts, you still weren’t confident that you could ever be good enough.
“Hey, look at me.” She said, a finger on your chin forcing you to look up. Her blue eyes studied you for a moment, her hips pressing you to the wall while her other hand brushed a stray hair out of your face. “Are you ok?” She asked, her voice soft, hesitant.
“I’m great,” You scoffed, shaking your head. “I just fucking won the fucking Chaos cup and all the fuck they want to ask me about is how my sister is, and if I think I stand a chance against her in making a fucking roster. She hasn’t even talked to me since-...” your chest heaved as the words spilled from your mouth, like the steam from a pressure cooker unable to be contained any longer.
“Hey, take a breath,” her voice was soft as she wiped away the tears you didn’t even know were burning a path down your red cheeks. You leaned into her warm hands.
“I just. I want to be good enough,” You mumbled, your eyes closing with the admission. You didn’t want to be weak.
“Baby, you are enough. You’re more than enough. You’re funny and cute and an amazing forward. You aren’t your sister and that’s ok. You don’t need to be the best Mal, you just need to be the best, most amazing you you can be because I love you,” with every word she got closer to you, until your faces were mere inches apart, and you could feel her breath fan across your lips.
You leaned in the rest of the way and connected your lips with hers. Your mouths moved together, her tongue gently probing for entrance, which you gladly gave her. Her fingers tangled in the baby hairs at the base of your neck, while yours settled on her hips to pull her closer.
“You said you love me,” You smiled against her lips, pulling away when the need to breathe finally caught up with you.
“Hm, I do,” She hummed back, connecting your lips again.
Maybe to the soccer world, you would always stand in Mal’s shadows, but here in the belly of the stadium, you knew. You were enough for Kristie, and she was enough for you.
533 notes · View notes
bonjour-rainycity · 3 years
Text
Late in the Night | Part One
Prompt: Unrequited love/the love is requited, they’re just oblivious (Content Challenge Day 5)
Pairing: One-sided ( or is it ;) ) Female Reader x Legolas
Rating: G
Word count: 1847
Warnings: None
Challenge participants: @game-ofthe-company @grunid @themerriweathermage @errruvande @the-reformed-ringwraith @awkwardkindatries
A/n Hello hello, and happy Day 5 of my content challenge! As always, you can find the challenge’s masterlist here and my personal masterlist here. 
I’m making these last three days into a mini-series, so here’s part one! Also, for this story, I’m going with the “girl wakes up in Middle Earth” plot, but LOTR doesn’t exist in her world. So she doesn’t know anything about the characters or their journey. She just kind of fell through a portal between worlds. Y’know?
Translations (I think): Taur-e-Ndaedelos — Mirkwood // Eryn Galen — Greenwood
Reader’s POV
“And Miss Y/n, what will you do once this is all over? Will you go back home?” Pippin stops to let me catch up, bringing me into step with him and Merry.
I purse my lips, not wanting to give too much away. The others know that I have a bit of an, erm—strange— situation, but they don’t know that I haven’t got a home in Arda. We’ve had at least ten variants of this conversation already, and each time, I’ve managed to avoid participating. It seems my hobbit friend, though, is done letting that slide.
I shrug, trying to seem nonchalant. “I haven’t really thought about that much…” Just in case there’s no ‘once this is all over’. “But I guess I would find a human town somewhere and build a life. I’ve learned quite a lot on this journey, so maybe I could make a living as a guard or even a seamstress, seeing how often I mend your clothes,” at this, I throw a teasing look at Gimli, who blushes. Out of all of us, he’s the most prone to non-battle related injury, and I often find him trudging back to camp with a rip in his sleeve after simple tasks like collecting firewood or refilling his canteen.
Pippin ignores my joke, and now I realize that I have the concern-laden eyes of all four hobbits. “You…would not go back home? You wouldn’t see your family?”
I sigh, avoiding Gandalf’s gaze. He said I was free to tell my companions that I am not of this world, but I haven’t yet worked up the nerve. The stress of figuring out how I got here, why I’m here…it’s too much to burden them with on this perilous quest. I stifle a little laugh, my exhausted mind finding humor in the situation. Maybe that’s what I’ll do ‘once all this is over’. I’ll tell them that I’m practically an alien.  
Lost in my thoughts as I was, my silence drew the attention of Gimli and Boromir, and now I have six sets of concerned eyes regarding me. Great. I try to speed the conversation along so we can get to someone else. “Well, I haven’t seen my family in quite a long time…I think they think I’m dead, actually, and for all I know, they could be too…” This thought troubles me greatly, and I hurry to replace it with something else, forcing my voice to sound cheery and hopeful.“But that only means that I’m free to go anywhere—explore any place I like.”
Pippin looks quite heartbroken at my words, and I scramble to think of ways to fix it. But before I can, he grips my hand tightly in his, and I feel Merry mirror his actions on my other side. They look up at me triumphantly, smiling brightly. “You can come live with us, in The Shire,” Pippin declares, to which Sam nods earnestly. Frodo, as always of late, seems distracted, but offers me a distant smile.
A laugh of shocked joy escapes my lips, and I look between my valiant hobbit friends with possibly even more affection than before. “Do they even allow that? Big Folks moving into The Shire?”
“Sure they do,” Merry brushes away my concerns, appearing quite assured of himself.
But Pippin only shrugs, seemingly having not a care in the world. “And if they don’t, we’ll just sneak you in.”
“Gondor would be happy to host you as well,” Boromir adds, surprising me a little. We haven’t talked much on this journey, so it’s nice to know that he sees me as enough of a friend to invite me to his home.
Feeling much better, I squeeze Merry and Pippin’s hands. “Thanks, you guys. Really.”
{***}
We stop when it gets too dark for most of us to see.
“We are too far from Rivendell’s borders for me to feel comfortable.” Aragorn shakes his head slowly as he considers our surroundings and the potential risk we face. “I would ask that we keep a double watch tonight, and for many nights to come. Y/n, Legolas?”
Legolas—the only one of us who seems to have an endless supply of energy—jogs to a tall rock a couple hundred meters from camp, and begins to climb. I’m a bit slower to follow.
In the past three weeks, Aragorn has put me on watch eight times, the most only after himself and Legolas, and definitely more than our other companions. Sam shoots me an apologetic look and quietly promises to bring us dinner as soon as it’s ready.
I grab my cloak and follow Legolas’ path, trying to keep my annoyance to a minimum. After all, it’s not the worst thing in the world…staying up most of the night with Legolas, just the two of us.
He hears me coming and turns around with a welcoming smile, lowering a hand to help pull me onto the boulder. His hand is so warm in mine, so solid, and I find myself wishing he wouldn’t let go.
But of course he does, taking his hand from mine the moment I’m settled next to him. I tuck my hands into my cloak, trying not to lament the loss. Regardless of my quickly-growing feelings towards my elven friend, he has never given me an indication that he sees me as anything more than that, a friend, and I need to respect that.
He fixes me with a raised eyebrow, somehow both looking at me and the landscape over my shoulder. “Are you alright with staying awake tonight? It has been a while since you slept fully.”
I freeze, caught in a sudden burst of happiness. He noticed that? Has he been paying attention to me?
Legolas continues, and the fledgling hope that perhaps my affections for him aren’t as one-sided as I thought comes crashing down. “I could speak to Aragorn. It is no issue for me to stand watch alone.”
I briefly close my eyes, berating myself for my stupidity. He’s not commenting on your well-being, he just doesn’t want to have to be alone with you for the next five hours. He must somehow know of your feelings and wants to discourage them — because really, why would an elf want to be with a human?
I purse my lips, desperately not wanting him to know I’m upset. “No, it’s okay, thank you though. I’ll do my part.” My words come out a bit more cooly than I intended, but that’s just as well. Best to seem unattached.
He nods, giving me a funny look, then turns to look back out on the vast expanse of trees.
Nearly an hour passes in silence, then Sam visits, bringing dinner with him. Aragorn had managed to find two rabbits, so we eat well tonight. I savor it, knowing we might not be so lucky tomorrow, or the day after next. As usual, Legolas chooses to eat standing, not willing to sacrifice his careful watch over our surroundings. Knowing he’s got it covered, I sit down on the rock with Sam, having a make-shift picnic. Still, I keep my daggers close and periodically take note of the sounds of the forest, just in case. Sam entertains us with stories from his childhood and of life in The Shire. At a tale of how he and Frodo found themselves running from a furious farmer in the middle of the night, even Legolas cracks a smile.
But eventually, the food is gone and Sam is stifling yawns, so he bids us goodnight, leaving me alone with Legolas once again.
I stand, brushing the dust off my leggings, and take my place next to him.
His eyes never leave the horizon, but I hear his voice, soft, quiet, and almost hesitant-sounding. “Is it true that you haven’t a home to return to?”
I’m a bit caught off guard. During that conversation earlier in the day, Legolas was all the way at the front the group, leading with Aragorn. I didn’t know he’d heard that. “Uh, yeah.” I nod, trying to project a confidence I don’t really feel. “It is.”
He goes silent, and stays silent for such a long time that I think that’s all the conversation we’ll have. But then, he speaks again, his voice steady and deliberate. “My home, Taur-e-Ndaedelos, is not safe right now.”
“Oh.” I blink. Is he opening up to me? I try to respond delicately, not wanting to accidentally discourage him from sharing his feelings in the future. “I am sorry. That must be very difficult.”
He waves off my apology, meeting my eyes for the quickest of moments and then turning once more to the landscape before us. “My people get by. I only meant that, perhaps…well, if we succeed, and the Great Evil is defeated, Taur-e-Ndaedelos will be safe, and might even be called Eryn Galen once more.” He shifts from one foot to the other, something I’ve never seen him do. “You would be welcome there.”
A smile—the widest one I’ve managed in a while—spreads over my face, and try as I might, I am unable to reel it in. Because even after all this is over, when the time would come naturally for us to part ways, he wants me still in his life. I’ve always figured that it would hurt me to be parted from him, but I never dreamed that he would feel the same way.
Legolas seems to grow agitated by my silence, and turns to look at me with a measure of stress in his brow. But once he sees my reaction to his words, the lines in his face soften into a grin of his own. “Gimli is similarly without a permanent dwelling. I have extended an invitation to him as well.”
Oh.
Of course.
I fight the urge to roll my eyes at myself, feeling incredibly stupid. Of course I would read into his words. He didn’t mean anything significant by them, he was just offering me a place to stay, like he obviously would to any of his friends. Because he is a kind, good, and noble ellon.
Of course he doesn’t feel the same way as I do.
I was silly to hope.
I try to keep the smile plastered to my face and not let him see my crushing disappointment. That would be horribly embarrassing, and I’m not sure I could take the pity that would surely be on his compassionate face if he had to verbally express his disinterest.
“That—” my voice sounds annoyingly weak, and I clear my throat to correct it. “That’s really kind of you, Legolas. Thank you.”
There’s a question in his eyes, but he doesn’t ask it, only nods once and returns to his watch of the forest.
For my part, I try to turn all of my focus to the task at hand, reminding myself that, even if he never loves me back, I am truly lucky to have such a wonderful friend.
A/n See you all tomorrow with part two! Likes, comments, and reblogs make my day! Also, let me know if you would like a tag.
Masterlist
Next part
227 notes · View notes
puppypeter · 3 years
Text
Tumblr media
These are all dark fics, READ THE TAGS before reading the fics. It is your responsibility to check whether what you are about to read is something that you can stomach. While most of these fics are based around trauma, recovery etc many feature triggering scenes or flashbacks as well as darker themes. Please be safe and don’t read them if they can be triggering for you! Proceed with caution! Most of them are Hydra Trash, but still not just the ugly bits as I like there to be a plot. Hiding them below the cut:
between scylla and charybdis | 21590 words
Sam Wilson has been witness to a lot of things he wishes he could unsee. Civilian families shot dead in their cars because of miscommunications at checkpoints. Riley’s body spiralling to the ground in a smoke-plumed plummet. His own face in his bathroom mirror after waking up hung-over as hell at two in the afternoon, the day after the anniversary of Riley’s death, year after year after year.
And now, in an abandoned bunker on the outskirts of Boston, a seemingly unremarkable manila folder at the bottom of a filing cabinet.
Berceuse | 10730 words
There are strange, new things Bucky needs from Steve.
Dreamers Often Lie | 11040 words
As far as Bucky remembers, sex is something that is painful and terrifying if you wake up while it's happening. As the Asset, sleeping through sex was a rare treat. When Steve lets Bucky know he's interested in a sexual relationship, what Steve doesn't know is that they have fundamentally different ideas of what that entails.
despite the threatening sky and the shuddering earth (they remained) | 71532 words
“They really didn’t want the mask to come off.” Hill thumbed through the scans, and pulled out a film that she then handed over to Sam, face mostly expressionless but for the flat line of her pursed lips.
Sam accepted the film and held it up to the light, angling so both he and Steve could see it, squinting at the outline of the Winter Soldier’s skull, and the blips of unnatural white that showed up, God, in his brain, not to mention about half his teeth, plus the mask, with its thin protrusions—
“Those are pins,” Steve realized. He looked over at Hill. “The mask—it’s nailed to his face.”
Hill’s face was as unmoved as ever. “Like I said. They really didn’t want it coming off.”
Fire And Water For Your Love | 77084 words
When the Avengers investigate an abandoned HYDRA base on behalf of S.H.I.E.L.D., they unexpectedly encounter a dark-haired man with a torn metal arm, who leads them to an even more shocking discovery deeper inside the base. The Avengers must reconcile what they have found with the lies S.H.I.E.L.D. has been telling for decades.
Give An Inch | 5070 words
The Captain has a warm smile and clear, open eyes. The Soldier knows these are tricks. He's fallen for them before and he won't do it again.
Humans As Gods | 4818 words
"HYDRA's scientists had been delighted to find their serum-reversal procedure had worked. Their jubilation was dampened by the discovery that Steve's smaller self might no longer be Captain America-sized but was still 100% Steve Rogers, and Steve Rogers was now mad enough to spit nails. A minor oversight in the design of the containment area meant that smaller-Steve had simply wriggled out of the now ridiculously-oversized restraints like an angry ferret escaping a paper bag, and punched the nearest technician in the nuts.
Chaos ensued."
HYDRA scientists successfully de-serum Captain America, only to discover that they are utterly unprepared for Steve Rogers. Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier follows his instructions to the letter. This works out just great.
The Only One That Needs To Know | 6571 words
Bucky can't control his body. He can only control what secrets he keeps.
I Was Wearing My Blue Coat | 11503 words
Following exposure of his past as the Winter Soldier, anonymous postings of explicit video footage, 63 charges of murder and the wrath of the Internet, James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes finally steps into the limelight and tells his story to Zenat Patel of the New York Times.
Compliance Will Be Rewarded | 4767 words
Someone told him once: "Compliance will be rewarded," and he remembers pressing his head against a man’s leg in open supplication. He remembers hands in his hair, and a gentle grip on the back of his neck. He remembers a man telling him "so good, so good for me aren't you?" And he remembers nodding his head in a desperate attempt to be exactly as good as he was supposed to be.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Bucky Barnes is physically free from Hydra, but the hold on his mind lingers still. All he wants is to go home, and he'll do anything he can to get there.
To Burn Your Kingdom Down | 12370 words
The Avengers go after a Hydra splinter cell with a nasty habit of brutalizing their prisoners. Steve has some ugly history with them, and when a rescue mission gone wrong leaves him and Sam in enemy hands, the situation gets uglier still.
Worth The Wound | 7709 words
The asset knows that maintenance is better than punishment. But with Steve, maintenance becomes more pleasant, soft and gentle and everything he could dream of. It was only natural that he decided to prolong that maintenance a little longer.
The Spaces In-Between | 6971 words | Part 1 of What We Tried So Hard To Hide Away
"Memories are like buckets of water: they weigh on the heart and the brain until the body fails. You're blessed to stay forgetful and young, Soldier."
Sometimes blessings feel like curses.
Illuminate The Scene | 7086 words | Part 2 of What We Tried So Hard To Hide Away
The doctors had wanted to keep the Soldier. Shock him and freeze him until he was fixed, or tear him to scrap if he couldn’t be repaired so that he wouldn’t be an entirely wasted investment. Steve is the only thing stopping them.
When the Soldier can't trust his own body, how can he trust anything?
All These Riots Of Broken Sound | 83790 words | Part 1 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend
When Steve and the team return to Avengers tower to find Bucky gone, they must venture into B.A.R.F. to figure out what triggered him to leave and hunt those who wronged him. Trapped in a simulation of Bucky's worst memories with rogue HYDRA agents waiting to strike, 100 years of secrets, lies, pain and love drive the team to their limit and push Steve towards a realisation that is a century in the making.
I Was Lost But Left A Trace | 3585 words | Part 2 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend
Disorientated, the Asset reached up to wipe at the moisture on its cheeks and was shocked to find it clear, instead of the crimson it has been expecting. It didn’t understand why this misidentification had caused uproarious laughter from the technicians.
“It is not blood,” the Asset told him, “but it is still a malfunction.”
This sobered the technician a little, and he nodded tightly.
“Yes. It is. But we will fix you.”
I’ll Always Be Blamed For The Sun Going Down | 9907 words | Part 3 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend
He knows he’s in the right place. He has heard the guys at the docks laugh and joke about the queers who come out after dark, looking to earn a little extra cash. He has seen the johns, when he’s been out late enough, skulking in the shadows like predators hunting for their next meal, looking for something in particular. Sometimes they look at him.
A small, rusty pen knife that his father had picked up in Europe during the Great War sits heavy in the breast pocket of his jacket. Just in case.
Book Of The Moon | 16019 words | Part 4 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend
In 1929, Bucky Barnes falls in love for the first time and resigns himself to never telling a soul, let alone Steve, the object of his affections. In 1943, half a world away from the man he can never have and fighting for his life and his sanity, something new begins to bloom.
Habeas Corpus | 18054 words
An unexpected incident in the field leaves Steve Rogers facing the infiltration of a Hydra base and retrieval of important intelligence, all while pretending to be the Winter Soldier. Unfortunately, there are important aspects of the Soldier's past that Bucky hasn't disclosed, and Steve has no idea what he's really walking into.
Bullies | 14979 words
Written for the MCU trash meme prompt:
I wanna see Steve being messed with by his secretly-HYDRA coworker buddies. I want them generally fucking with him, "accidentally" doing terrible things to him or getting Steve into awful situations, telling jokes that aren't really jokes, gaslighting, performing sexual-assault hazing under the guise that "that's what people do now," pressuring him into other sex shit, anything, just fuck Steve up.
Steve isn't failing to fully catch on because he's dumb or oblivious: it's just that he is Steve, so he wants to believe the best of everybody, and he doesn't want to believe that he could be working for/with bullies and that (as Natasha says) he essentially died for nothing.
Not Unwanted, Not Unloved | 50320 words
They'd resigned themselves to never becoming parents - until Bucky gets pregnant and drops off the grid without even a whisper to his mate about his condition. Steve will still raze the earth to find him, but that doesn't mean he likes what he finds.
The Tones That Tremble Down Your Spine | 13889 words
Tony tells him they’re planning a party for Steve’s birthday. He knows how parties are supposed to go.
Lacuna | 62875 words
The Winter Soldier doesn't remember Steve Rogers, but he needs Rogers' help.
OR: The one where Bucky doesn't remember Steve, but falls in love with him anyway.
Not A Perfect Soldier | 93354 words
In a world where HYDRA was wiped out in the '40s, Steve is found by the Army rather than SHIELD. General Thaddeus Ross wants a perfectly obedient super-soldier at his command, and to that end, he sets out to break Steve to his will. As Steve struggles to come to terms with all he has lost, his life in captivity is only made bearable by the presence of another prisoner-- another super-soldier known only as "Soldat". Then the Avengers strike a deal with Ross to "borrow" him for missions, and Steve is faced with a team who dislikes him, an organization he doesn't trust, and the question of what he's willing to do to escape Ross's clutches.
For Want Of Him | 103174 words
It's the twenty-first century, and Steve Rogers has never been more alone. Everything he knew, everyone he loved, is now gone, and a dark, bitter loneliness claws at him, raking bleeding gashes into his heart. And then there's Brock Rumlow. Rumlow is like salt in his wounds; vicious, and cruel. But his dark brown hair and teasing smirk reminds Steve of someone long dead, and his New York accent sounds like home...He's a soldier like him...he understands. And Steve makes the fatal mistake of trusting him.
The Same Measure | 4943 words
The Winter Soldier was never allowed to stop unless an injury was too grievous.
To Be Unmade | 5114 words | Part 1 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower
For the asset, things only ever get worse. The external scars fade quickly enough. The internal ones dig deeper and deeper.
But the internal scars are called love, and doesn't that make them worth the hurt?
Do Not Put In The Icebox | 7143 words | Part 2 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower
When the asset malfunctions on a mission, Rumlow and Rollins learn more than they ever wanted to know about Pierce's hobbies.
And then everyone has pancakes.
The Knowing Makes It Worse | 4130 words | Part 3 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower
No is a bad word and invites punishment.
Or, Alexander Pierce is a very bad man who delights in manipulating and degrading the asset.
Love Is For Children | 5303 words | Part 4 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower
Bucky understands how the game works. He can't understand why it makes Steve cry.
But Natasha and the other Avengers are there to help.
I Just Wanted To Be Sure Of You | 4461 words | Part 5 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower
Bucky has Bucky Bear; it's only fair for Natasha to have something of her own.
Visiting a toy store wasn't strictly necessary, but if Tony wants to throw money around, no one's going to complain.
“Till The End Of The Line | 6069 words | Part 6 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower
It's hard to take a friendship right back up when so much has changed over seventy years.
Particularly when HYDRA's conditioning resurfaces.
*if you feel that any of these fics shouldn’t be in this list please just send me a message! :) I have read them all but over the past 1+ years so some of them I might not remember all the details of :)
117 notes · View notes
florencwrites · 3 years
Text
ECHOES, PAGE NINE 〚dreamwastaken〛
Sam allows Dream to write a singular message, one that he so desperately seeks. A visitor comes to cheer her up, he never fails to. series homepage
The walls of the portal room had been smoldering and sizzling ever since it was built, however, even though the prison itself was built from the same stone they were not one and the same ore.
You see, the portal room had been built from stone extracted from the deepest of caves, lukewarm water with scorching magma. They had been melted and merged until they ultimately would form the blistering mineral they were now.
The prison itself needed more stone than the measly chamber, obviously. So, to cut costs, the prison itself was built from surface lava, a stream that had appeared in splotches across a field somewhere close to the mountain ranges. The water they had used was icey, freshly molten away from the very peaks of the extreme hills. This made it easier to not only mine but also place, gather, and lean against for prolonged periods of time.
Which is exactly what was happening for hours on end, within the tepid confines.
Dream had never felt more useless, bored, simply.. Blasé. Spiritless, indifferent. He could keep mustering up words, carving them down into his singular chest with the blunt pen he had received from the warden. He had been given a full chest of books, and when he grew excited for new reading material; he quickly learned for them to be empty. Devoid of a singular word. All of them.
Sam had rolled the unsharpened pen over the netherite hedge with a level of disinterest even he was quite jealous of. He had shot up from the corner of his cell where he had been bathing his feet in a built-in pond of sorts. His wet feet splattered against the tiles, sliding away from where they were set down in the slightest. "Is she still there?"
"Sam!" He knew not to lean on the bricks themselves, having learned the amount of voltage on them the hard way many a time before. "Sam! Is she still there?"
The man had already stepped back onto the platform that would take him back through the drowning lava. "I'm not doing any of this for you, I need you to know that."
He finally turned back to face Dream, adding, "Write her something."
"Anything?"
"A goodbye, Dream."
She, however, had been oblivious to her friend's unwavering protectiveness. She had not a clue that the letters her lover wrote had been disbanded piece by piece, only because they didn't convey the message Sam so desperately desired.
There was not a doubt in his mind that their parting would ultimately be best for her and her mental well-being. Dream, however, was a stubborn man. He was not someone who got intimidated easily, he was patient and there would always be that one thing Sam could never account for, nor change; Dream's love was set in stone.
It was carved in the walls of every cave he had explored, it was etched into his skin with runny ink. He was feverish with love, whether it was the matching prints they had gotten together that had gotten infected after all, or whether it was simply his unfaltering affection for her.
They had taken away everything, his freedom, his friends, his mask, even his bright eyes had been dulled by their hands; but they would never take her away.
Sam spent his days in the library, hours upon hours spent exploring the aisles and scrutinizing seemingly endlessly long pieces of text in the hopes of finding a way to break the spell he had on her. His every waking moment was brought to by the windowsill, surrounded by towering piles of ancient books.
And, was his mind not occupied by the swirling letters, his eyes would always trail around the waterline in search of her. Not much of a search it was, though, she would always be sat exactly where he reckoned her to be.
He let his eyes wander over the permanent sorrow etched into her face, the trail of grass floating on the waves. "What I'd give to take your place."
She knew there were little men who were as persistent as her, who could drown themselves in their wit for as long as she had. Her tears had dried, deciding to spare themselves for when she truly needed them. Her shoulders were raw with the aches they had had to endure for the longest time, the uncontrollable shaking they would endure for the entirety of every night.
She never really slept anymore, sleeping meant to see him in the worst state imaginable. However, that wasn't the worst thing. The nightmares she could handle. Seeing him all bloodied and tortured, some days he would seem content, happy. Those hurted more.
The worst thing about the nightmares was that whenever she awoke from one of them, for a split second her mind would reassure her, "It's just a dream."
A blade to the heart, constricted airways every morning when she inevitably had to come to the realization that it was not just a dream. The nightmare becomes reality, the hunter becomes the hunted.
"Hey." A scratchy voice sounded from a few feet behind her. "Still sad, huh?"
She rapidly crawled to her knees, pulling her feet from the water that had started to wilt her skin. "You fucker."
She embraced him as he, too, fell to his knees. "You absolute prick."
A smile on her face, bright enough to light up the entirety of the realm. He, almost instinctively, returned her beam, his eyes squinting with the force of it. He'd missed her. "I'm a minor, you can't swear in my presence."
"Please, just shut your mouth for one goddamn second." She giggled in his shoulder, oh, how she missed the times he had been a little boy. The days where she could pick him up with a small huff, throw him on the back of her saddle and return him to his father after another one of his little escapades. How Phil would always thank her with the most genuine eyes, telling her that he wished he could promise that it wouldn't happen again, but how it probably would again tomorrow.
"You're mean to me, I'm gonna tell Philza you said that." He pulled from her embrace, deciding to sit criss-cross from her in the grass, letting the blades tickle his exposed ankles. He truly needed new jeans. "I reckon you missed me more than I did you."
"I'm sure I did, Tommy."
57 notes · View notes
little-diable · 3 years
Text
All the good girls go to hell - Dean Winchester (Wincest smut)
This is my official ticket into hell, enjoy my loves. xxx
Summary: A moment of bravery puts the reader into a situation she kept dreaming about for the past few years, just like her brother Dean, she simply couldn’t stop aching for him. 
Warnings: 18+, smut, unprotected sex, Dean x sister!reader, Wincest all the way
Tumblr media
Standing there, killing time Can't commit to anything but a crime
Falling in love with your sister, the person you shouldn’t love more than a brother should love his sister, the person you grew up with, something Dean Winchester struggled with for the past few years. He felt ashamed of himself, felt disgusted by himself every time he had his hands wrapped around his girth, pumping himself to the thought of (y/n).
 But somehow along the way he had accepted his sick and twisted thoughts, keeping them hidden from the rest of the world, trying to bite down his hunger for her, oh the things he wanted to do to her.
Dean was quite oblivious to the fact that (y/n) struggled with the same twisted love she had for her brother, hand disappearing into her panties late at night, moaning Dean's name, imagining how his length would stretch her walls. There had been some flirting here and there, lasting glances, growls spilling from his lips, but they had never crossed the invisible wall between them.
Not once.
“Will you come to the bar with us?” Dean entered her room without knocking, gulping as his eyes fell upon her frame, wrapped in a towel, drops of water still glistered on her skin, hair pulled up in a bun.
“Uhm, yeah sure, give me a few minutes,” he should have turned around and left her room, but the tightness in his trousers made Dean close the door behind him, plopping down on her chair, green eyes admiring every inch of her. “Dean?” (Y/n) chuckled his name, holding onto her towel a bit tighter, thighs pressed together, his hungry gaze shot shivers right down her spine.
He bit down on his lip, smirking at his sister, “Oh, don’t let me disturb you.” He sunk further into the chair, almost choking on his saliva as she dropped her towel, nipples covered by her arms, eyes focused on him as she grasped her bra. “Shit,” Dean muttered under his breath, “You alright there?” She smirked, voice sweet as honey, slowly dressing herself, taking some time with choosing a fitting blouse and the pair of jeans that would sit tight around her ass.
His breathing quickened as she walked towards him, dropping onto her knees, placing one hand on his leg, moving her fingers further up her brother's thigh.
Dean didn’t notice how she was searching for her pair of boots underneath the chair, his eyes rolled back,  head falling to the side, just as she was about to place her palm on his bulge she rose onto her feet. “I’m ready,” and out of her room she went, holding onto her boots, chuckling at Sam who was impatiently waiting for his siblings, ready to get drunk, to take his mind off the recent hunt, stumbling into the arms of a lonely woman he’d follow home.
All the good girls go to hell 'Cause even God herself has enemies
She’d catch Dean's gaze through the rearview mirror, winking at him, encouraged by the confident feeling that took over every vessel of her body. 
He wouldn’t let her out of his sight, stepping in as soon as another man tried to approach her, shying away from Dean's hard gaze, the clenched jaw, the protective hand on her hip. “How about we play some pool?” She kept holding onto her beer bottle, hand finding Deans, pulling him towards the table, (y/e/c) eyes teasing him with every move of hers.
“There’s no chance you’ll win.” He pressed his front against her back, murmuring into her ear, emphasizing his last word, sharply inhaling as (y/n) leaned her front onto the table, ass perfectly moving against his crotch. “It’s on,” she spat, set on destroying him, to wipe his overly confident smirk off his lips, trying to forget about the wetness that pooled between her thighs, arousal seeping through the fabric of her lace panties.
Halfway through the game Sam whistled at them, waving his hand as he followed a girl out of the bar, at least they’d be on their own in the bunker, having enough time and privacy to tease each other further. 
The moment she wrapped her lips around her bottle, Dean grasped his jacket, interlacing his fingers with hers, pulling (y/n) out of the bar. Forcefully he pressed her against baby, noses touching, hot breath crashing against each other's skin. He cupped her cheeks, lips ghosting over hers, gulping as he shook his head, stepping away from her, holding open baby’s door for an overly confused (y/n).
His thoughts were getting the best of him, once again disgusted by his ungodly desires, no words left Dean, he didn’t spare her one glance, trying to ignore the frown that tugged on her features. “Dean,” (y/n) whispered as he parked the car, an exhausted sigh spilled from his lips, eyes not finding hers, avoiding her gaze. “Dean”, she repeated his name, hand finding his, “It’s okay.” But it wasn’t okay and it would never be.
She followed him inside, another wave of guilt was crashing upon her, too distracted by her thoughts, wrapped up in her anxiety, not noticing how Dean kept on staring at her, mumbling a small “fuck it” as he pressed his lips against hers. (Y/n) was quick to react to his touch, lips moving in synch, arms wrapped around his neck, moaning into his mouth.
My Lucifer is lonely
His hands moved down to her behind, “Those jeans will be the death of me”. With his hands squeezing her skin, she jumped into his arms, legs wrapped around his waist, lips finding his. 
Dean carried her down the hallway, to his room, locking the door behind him, tumbling down on the bed with her, not breaking the kiss once. His lips made their way to her neck, hands unbuttoning her jeans, groaning as his fingers disappeared into her panties, arousal sticking to his fingertips, “You like that, don’t you? About to get fucked by your brother, you dirty little slut.”
The words should have made her realize how fucked up the whole situation was, but the only reaction he coaxed out of her was another moan, giving into his touch, Dean kept adding pressure to her clit, bringing her closer to her release. But he wouldn’t be Dean Winchester, if he’d let her have her release just like that, he pulled off his shirt, lips finding their way back to her skin, kissing her nipples through the fabric of her bra, hands moving her jeans and panties down her leg.
(Y/n) whined his name, walls dripping in anticipation, she had been waiting way too long, wasn’t in the mood for his games, she needed him and every part of him. 
“Such a desperate slut for me, aching for my cock, ain’t that right?” He unclasped her bra, biting into her skin, cupping her boobs with his hands. His length throbbed against his jeans, growing and growing, desperate to be freed, wondering how she’d feel wrapped around him. “Don’t tease me,” she sobbed, groaning as her eyes fell upon his length, he’d completely destroy her.
Her mind wandered back to all those times she had seen him naked, eyes focused on his defined abs, wishing to run her fingers along his skin, to explore every inch of him. God, there wouldn’t be a day where she wouldn’t touch herself to the thought of his naked frame and all those things he could do to her.
Look at you needing me
“You’re mine, you belong to me,” he spat, grasping her jaw, eyes hooked on hers, length pushed  against her inner thighs, tip nudged against her entrance, coated with her dripping wetness. “You belong to your big brother, tell me, how many times did you touch yourself to the thought of me fucking you?” His raspy voice made (y/n) curl her toes, holding onto his defined biceps, struggling to keep her eyes open. “Mhm?” He pressed on, putting more and more pressure onto her entrance, encouraged by the addicting feeling of dominating her.
“Every night,” (y/n) cried out, the sound turned into a moan, Dean had effortlessly slipped into her wetness, completely stretching her walls, bigger than all the boys she had been with. Both were too far gone, to let their minds speak to them, reminding them once again how fucked up the whole situation was. But something about it urged them on, made him snap his hips even more ferociously, made her sounds sound louder than ever.
Soon enough she tumbled over the edge, biting into the spot where his shoulders met his neck, coaxing a deep moan out of Dean. Just as he was about to release himself the door to the bunker crashed open, a very drunk Sam made his way into the kitchen, not noticing the small whimpers and moans that came out of his brother's room.  He sang a few lyrics, cursing as the glass he was reaching for fell onto the floor, crashing apart into tiny shards.
Man is such a fool Why are we saving him?
Dean didn’t move, holding off his release, head whipping towards his door as they heard the glass fall out of Sam's hands. She pushed him off her chest, hurrying  to put her clothes back on, running into the kitchen, scared that something had happened to her brother. 
“Sammy, hey, you okay?” She began to pick up the shards, eyes focused on Sam, giggling as a loud laugh rumbled through him, mumbling a few drunken words. Dean stepped into the kitchen, he didn’t say a word, avoiding her gaze at all costs, pulling Sam off the chair, tugging him into his room.
She sighed, a lump formed in her throat, tears momentarily blurred her vision, the somber realization of what had happened just moments ago seemed to settle in, god, what had they done. 
(Y/n) cleaned her hands, careful not to cut herself, eyes focused on Dean's closed door as she made her way into her bedroom. She pressed her face into the pillow, tears soaking through the fabric, feeling overly disgusted by herself, though not because of what had happened, but because she feared that Dean had realized that he didn’t want her, why would he want to be with his sister in the first place.
Just like (y/n), Dean had his face buried into his pillow, heavily breathing, trying to calm himself down, wondering if she’d ever look at him the same, would she hate him, would she avoid him, for the things he had done just moments ago?
My God is gonna owe me There's nothing left to save now
Minutes of tossing and turning faded  into hours, a sigh rumbled through Dean, he left his room, tapping into the kitchen, freezing as his eyes fell upon her frame. “Hi,” she awkwardly waved at him, a smile tugged on his lips, leaning his weight against the door frame, “hey, can’t sleep?”
She shook her head, toying with the sleeves of her shirt, “Dean?” She whispered, “can I ask you something?” He stepped closer, waiting for her to keep on talking, “Do you hate me?” A sob left her mouth as soon as the words spilled from her lips, arms wrapped around her knees, pulling them against her chest.
He grasped her sides and picked her up, carrying her into his room, hovering above her as he placed her down on his bed, “I could never hate you,” he wiped a few of her tears away, smiling at her.  (Y/n) couldn’t stop herself, pulling him down against her lips, somehow everything would fall into place, in their own twisted way, not letting go of each other, ever.
Tumblr media
Add yourself to my taglist
SPN Masterlist
Masterlist
304 notes · View notes
Text
The Mind of  a Broken Soldier (Leave Me Be, Chapter 2 )
Tumblr media
Hello People of Tumblr ! It’s ya girl Hazel ! I am back again with another chapter which i am 100% sure NOBODY request it because nobody requested this story in the first place but i’m still continuing it because i feel like it. I was planning on continuing this story and give sly nods to WandaVision and The Falcon and The Winter Soldier here and there along the way. Not in this chapter but... maybe on future chapters. But I’ll see how this one goes and where my idea leads me to.
So you need to read Chapter 1 to be able to understand this chapter properly because this chapter is solely Bucky’s point of view of the reader and some random thoughts. I love reading novels and love their style of writing hence i aspire to write a decent and proper story fanfiction. I mean when you read some books, there will be several chapters viewed from that other characters’ perspective so i decided to implement that style to my story. 
So once again, thank you so much if you decided to pop by, read it and love it. Don’t be shy to pop by my message box to share some ideas you have or maybe you just wanna vibe together, I’d love to do that with you guys too. But please please please don’t be mean if you don’t like it. FYI, this chapter is slightly shorter than the first chapter. Love, Hazel .
Disclaimer: No disclaimer or any warnings. But definitely do me and yourself a favour and check out Chapter 1 so you can properly comprehend this chapter with ease :) 
Characters : Bucky x Reader; teeny weeny mention of Sam :)
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“Look man, I know we don’t really see eye to eye but I call to check on her…How’s she doin’?” Sam heaved a sigh of empathy from across the line.
I tightened my grip upon the thin, slick and smooth communication tool which now known as smartphone that I hadn’t had the chance to acquaint with. I let out a sigh of desperation, desperate of ways to haul her from the rabbit hole she’s now falling into. My fingers combing through my unruly long hair that’s bundled up in a disheveled bun. A bad habit of mine when I’m in desperation and anxiety.
“It’s been a week since Steve walked out from her life and if I’m being honest, Sam, she’s not doing very well. She’s…she’s been nestled up in her room since then.” I heaved another sigh of despair, my right human arm gripping the kitchen counter tightly in effort to prop myself while the other man-made hand still latched onto the phone.
“I even had to force feed her just to keep her alive for god sake.” I asserted whilst rubbing my right eye with the heel of my right human hand and quietly strutting towards her door. Leaning my side against the stark beige wooden door, plopping my ear against it to silently eavesdrop, just like how I had done countless times to check on her well-being without having to barge into the door. Soft whimper gradually shifted into muffled sobs. I closed my eyes, let my head hung low as if my neck was already tired enough to brace the weight of obstacles and desperation that merge into one and let out a long exhale.
“Gotta go, Sam… I’ll call you back.” I lowered my voice into mutter and hung up.
Even though I had known Steve for so many years, sometimes I still couldn’t decipher what’s in head. Recalling back to the 40s, way before he and I even considered enlisted into the army, women would always prefer me over Steve to take me out as their dancing partner when we’re at the bar. I felt bad for him and he’d sometimes complained that if only there’s the one out there who would see him through his frail and tiny stature. Seventy three years later, he abandoned the woman who’s been through with him through thick and thin, put up with his stupid decisions and god knows what more for eight years, for Peggy.
The woman whom he knew for only two years and only dated briefly.
The woman whom he’d share his infatuation and obsession with.
The woman he met at the army who didn’t even spare him a glance…not until after he’s gone through physical changes then eventually decided to give him a chance.
I wouldn’t even consider that as official if they only exchange flirting and longing glances at the office…
Tumblr media
bar… 
Tumblr media
and even Howard Stark’s Lab.
Tumblr media
Clasping my hand upon the door handle, I levered it down and pushed open the door generating soft creaking from the hinge. I tiptoed my way in and left the door ajar. There she was… dressed down in only white camisole and panties while curled up in a fetal position upon the bed which was a bit too spacious now for a single person. Her back facing towards me, shoulders quivering from muffling her own sobs into whimper. 
Oh Steve… what have you done…
I slowly crept my way towards her and slowly sank myself on the bed. I was hesitant to lay next to her but I tried to push that thought away considering her mental health was already at stake. If I left her untended, she might eventually spiraled into deep depression and she’s already halfway there. So I laid next to her, draped my arm over her frail, delicate and small body to hold her close as if sheltering her from her own whirlpool of emotions . While offering her the comfort of silence, my mind wander off to how on earth Wanda dealt with her own grief… poor kid not only lost her significant other but also her twin brother and parents as I was informed by Sam. My train of thought was halted when I heard her croaked a rhetorical question, 
“H-h-he’s not coming back, is he? Did that prick even try second guessing his decisions?”
I wish I could do more than being her shoulder to cry on and dragging Steve back by the ear. That punk really took all the stupid with him. I contemplated whether I should say something decent to comfort and lift her spirit but I retracted. “I’m sorry, Doll… “ Were the only words I could muster from my still-healing disrupted mind. After Hydra’s infamous torturous events and being sent away to Wakanda to get my mind fixed. I found that I had difficulties of expressing my thought and feelings emotionally from the years of being over-electrocuted and memory-wiped conducted by Hydra, more strenuous than my old self. Not that I couldn’t do it but I realized it took more time to do so.
But even so I still try to rack my brain, dig deeper to find something nice to say; to make myself feel a tad better for at least doing something good in my life for once after the horrendous past, to at least counteract all those gruesome dirty work I unconsciously did to the others.
“I tried talking some sense into him, but he was very adamant of his decision. That punk…I’m really sorry…” i tried to string those words together carefully, worried that one step further or slight wrong move might set the fire ablaze even more. At this point, I was scared considering I had never connected to women emotionally. Sure I’d dated many women back in the 40s, but never considered them seriously… Now I know how it felt to wear their shoes, to know how it felt to be ditched and forgotten, even though I didn’t experience it firsthand.
Running out of options and words to say, I scooted closer whilst tightened my embrace and inhaling her scent, a hint of fresh bed linen and lavender; Steve hates it when women used too much perfume to the point it’s suffocating. I remember he’d always complained about the atrocious penetrating smell of perfume whenever we walked past the women at the bar.
Tumblr media
“Doll… tell me what to do… I can’t bear seeing you breaking apart like this and I am running out of ways to numb your pain…” I consoled.
I used to be a good pep talker, a great one even; constantly spewing encouragement and lending a piece of advice or two to Steve. But I guess I had to shift my roles and be the good listener instead.
I did not expect her to open her heart and confide everything, as if she was confessing everything to me. I could only fervently listen to her anguish secrets that had been tormenting and keeping her awake. I felt really bad for the insecurity and self- doubt she had to endure these past years. Constant comparison with Peggy and doubting herself; nevertheless, she still fought her way to prove her worth… such strenuous and tenacious effort just to keep Steve’s attention to her…
Oh Steve… if only you’re in my position now, you’d know how much effort it took for her to keep up with your fantasy. They said love is full of sacrifices but not as much sacrifice from one side, both sides needed to make equal sacrifices to make things work, if one sacrifices too much, they’d weaken because they’re giving out too much and eventually died, just like her.
I knew Steve was always oblivious with things, but never as horrid as this. My heart sympathized and mourned for her. Eight years of relationship that she fought so hard to keep slipped out of her hands just like that.
“I-i-i-it h-h-h-urts, Buck… it hurts…He’s my first love, first kiss and…”
Tumblr media
I felt her body shook under my embrace. No longer able to withstand her emotional suffer, I tried to soothe and lull her to sleep.
“I know, Doll. But I promise you’ll get through it, I promise to be with you every step of the way. We will get through it. I am not going anywhere. I am not going to walk out this door, not until you kick me out because you’re so sick of looking at my face. You have my word, Doll. I am staying.” I promised.
I promised myself I’d be there to pick up the pieces regardless of any circumstances, because it’s the right thing to do. I’d be there to hoist her up when no one else could. i’m doing what a good friend would do... It’s the right thing to do … Right? 
60 notes · View notes
feather-dancer · 4 years
Text
Tales of Arcadia Fanfic Recommendations - Part 4
Are you thinking perhaps, wow I never expected a fourth fanfic recc list so soon? Because if you do I feel exactly the same way! I thought I’d have some more of my own writing out by the time it happened and yet even before Wizards I was building up a good list of reading then the release just set off a flood of ‘em I’ve been duly binging and hoarding. Because of how long this post is getting I’m at the point of wanting it out my drafts and in the wilds before it begins to grow legs.
As when I posted the third list, I suspect within 48 hours I’ll find a new fic and I’ll need to start drafting a fifth one thus the cycle continues...
You can find Part 1 of my fanfic recommendations here!
And Part 2 here!
Part 3 is here!
Plus one shameless plug for my own current fics because I can.
General Trollhunters
Hold My Hand in The Dark - Jim may have escaped the Darklands but even now it still has it’s claws in him.
To Say Nothing of the Dog - A Steli fic that’s very cute. Sometimes trolls aren’t the strangest thing you find out in the woods of Arcadia.
say that you'll stay awake for me - Another Steli fic where they’re both completely useless but it’s full of fluff anyway.
Candy canes and Sugar plums - Two very sweet Christmas themed one shots. In one Not!Enrique has to get ready for a photography session and another Jim as a half-troll gets mistaken for Krampus by a pair of kids.
Despondent Contemplations - Back in the old library that was once their home in Heartstone Trollmarket, Blinky and AARRRGGHH reminisce about old times. Contains minor spoilers for Wizards but not enough to remove from this section.
The Indecency of Courage - The thoughts of Kanjigar during his final battle.
Brotherhood - It’s hard to love a sibling who betrayed then later attempted to kill you and in return you permanently blinded but with some relationships it’s worth seeing if it’s still possible to mend.
In Our Times To Come - Jilaire, trauma comes in many shapes and forms but as long as you have the right people around you perhaps you can work your way through them together.
General Wizards - Skip this section if you wish to avoid spoilers
The City Never Sleeps - Douxie, Archie and Nari are now on the run trying desperately to keep off the radar in their new home of New York City but the flights of fancy of the old traveling days meet a whole new reality where things are a lot more expensive. For his new family though, this wizard willingly burns himself out over and over to keep them safe.
Home Away From Home -The sequel oneshot to the above and the struggle continues. Nari's attempts to figure out her place after a month of adjustment while Douxie seems to have lost all concept of things called plates.
a rescue from the weight you've carried - The ending these kids DESERVE.
Eyes Like Hope, a Smile Like Mercy, a Voice Like Justice - Without even realising it, Jim offered so much to the trolls of the past just by the virtue of being Jim.
Another Mistake - It’s not easy to revisit your past but in Douxie’s case he is offered a unique chance to see his younger self and the humbler roots he once came from.
Strings - Zouxie and oh GOD is this adorable and fluffy and I love it very much.
Waiting for Dawn - It’s over isn’t it? But Jim’s journey isn’t, not quite yet. His next task involves stumbling back home with the help of his friends and family and figure out the immediately of the after.
Center Stage - Douxie’s relationship with Merlin might have been incredibly complicated but it does not make the grief any easier to bear.
i've got to find my soul all before i sleep - Jim has been given a second chance at life and as a human at that but the niggling feeling of his old (New?) skin not quite fitting right anymore.
Stricklake
A Little Bit Pear-Shaped - Even when you think you haven’t taken your eye off the ball you find out maybe you might have and, well, then the title happens.
it's a lovely day in stricklake month - And Dreamcrow is once more coming up with the goods for us all to enjoy. The 6th chapter is nsfw as forewarning.
Dropout - Jim was human, once, then in the course of mere days he was transformed into a half-troll, fought to save the world and then forced to leave home and family behind as a reward for surviving. It’s no wonder that when given the chance to finally breathe again Barbara struggles with what has and what will be.
K.O. - The end result of Strickler’s terrible not so fun day results in a hospital visit but at least the upside involves the fact Barbara is there.
Alternate Universe
The Unwelcome Guest Do you remember Sam from the wonderful Whispers Within aka the Gay Uhl with a monster boyfriend fic? Well here he is a bit earlier than that still causing chaos but this time via trying to be ever so helpful towards a certain avocado coloured changeling who would sincerely like this to stop happening. Please.
left-hand florilegium - Even the great Walter (Stricklander) Strickler was a youngling, once, but no road a changeling may travel was designed to be anything other than a constant test to prove your worthiness in survival to gain a place in a brand new world.
Both Sides of the Sky - Jilaire with a historical regency twist and an arranged marriage that forces Jim into Claire’s path. On the surface he appears extremely nervous of something (Or more specifically someone) and she’s had quite enough of suitors making for a poor match. However, a simple act of kindness can bring with it an awful lot of shadows you might well have better off staying oblivious to.
A Foundation of Fluff - I never knew a ship of Barbara, Strickler and Draal could be so adorable and?? Yet?? The spite ship train is glorious. A foundation of fluff is a very apt description.
Broken Mirror - You might think this is another Unbecoming take but you’ll be surprised. During an argument with Merlin over his general treatment of others after the great move to New Jersey, Jim is flung elsewhere to wake up on the fabled day he found the amulet and very much human again. Not wanting to mess things up this time he goes to rescue Kanjigar before he is felled but nothing goes as expected.
Bitter Sixteen - The stalkling was set on Jim and in a lightning storm he was carried away but what if Toby never got that call to come to his rescue?
The World Ended Yesterday - The events of Unbecoming seem so long ago now yet here something went very wrong during the attempt to return to the future causing Jim to be lost to not only time but the very world he came from. Seemingly within another reset, he is not going to bury his head in the sand but equally the half-troll is determined to spare this world’s self future tragedy.
What the Night Brings - There are trolls in Arcadia, hidden underground and planning payback for having the surface lands stolen from them centuries ago. While there is contention in the ranks nobody dares say no to Gunmar the Skullcrusher and there is no Trollhunter to protect the dissents. Jim unwittingly witnesses what he should not and now carries the scars and no longer does he remain a human when the dusk comes, instead he is now some form of were-troll. What’s worse, he’s having to face this whole confusing mess alone.
Claire The Courageous - In a different universe Claire became the Trollhunter instead of Jim and Steve of all people ends up being the one dragged into the world of trolls with her. That however does not mean that Jim isn’t still involved in her journey in some way...
141 notes · View notes
rainwolfheart · 3 years
Text
i've been playing lovelink for a few days and i have reviews
Adam/Dominic - total sweetheart. lil basic but I am absolutely spending gems on him. 9/10
Aesha/Samantha - I wanted to like her but I can't deal with the cringe. and mc being so oblivious to game culture. also I am not into the sexy videogame outfits thing. 3/10
Albert/Jonathan - no thanks I don't respect the troops. might match with Albert if I'm desperate to farm gems. 1/10
Alex/Calum - too forward, wish there were more "cool your jets bro" options like there are with Blake/Keanu. also just doesn't feel realistic. "couldn't afford canvas so I painted on myself"??? you can buy canvas at the dollar store, it's good paint that's expensive. try harder. 3/10
Alice/Eve - matched with Eve before I reset and I want her back. didn't get far enough to really get to know her tho. 7/10
Ana/Milena/Ruby - I'm not into the "born sexy yesterday and you're the only human she knows" thing. I think she's super sweet and interesting and I want to help her, but I want her to make real friends and do stuff without mc! the obsession makes me uncomfortable. 3/10
Angel/Emmalyn - super sweet but I want to have nuanced animal rights/veganism conversations with her every time 😬 5/10
Antoine/Noah - one of the only pairs who's never come up! I want to match with Noah and get dog pictures. 5/10
Austin/Damien - ehh could take it or leave it. probably gonna match with Austin to farm gems. maybe I'll be surprised. 2/10
Blake/Keanu - kinda enjoying it. I matched with Blake first with a more femme mc in mind and I was kinda creeped out, but after I reset I matched with Keanu with a more masc mc and I'm into it. he's cuter. wish his pics were actually covered in ink tho?? he's got a sleeve and like 2 big pieces, he's not even the character with the most lmao. 5/10
Charlie/Jake/Zayn - ngl Charlie was one of the reasons I reset. I had already matched with Zayn but I found out Charlie is probably trans and I couldn't not. honestly not super into the storyline, as a theatre major who is a terrible actor, but I can live with it. 6/10
Clementine/Grace - matched with Grace before I reset, gonna go for Clementine tho. Grace has too many "sexy nerd halloween costume" vibes for me. Clementine has the same name as my cat but at least she's less cringe. 4/10
Cpt. Muffin - BEST MATCH. BRING HIM BACK. 11/10.
Dahlia/Rose - I think Dahlia is the most like someone I'd date irl she's too fucking cute. I have spent gems on every single option so far. I am buying an engagement ring and all the snacks as we speak. 10/10.
Daniel/Ryan - matched with Daniel before I reset and probs will again. kept rolling my eyes at his story tho. you can't just breach your NDAs to a random person on a dating app!! 4/10
Didier/Mamoru - waiting patiently for Mamoru.... 5/10
Dr. Vile - I'm a lil disappointed he greyed out so early. I'm having fun with the story but not sold yet. 6/10
Eveline/Jade - had Eveline before I reset and I want her back!!!! possibly my fave after Dahlia and Adam. also the kind of person I'd be into irl. 9/10
Garrett/Rory - pls match with me Garrett. 8/10
Hazel - ??? 4/10
Hugo/Marco - unpopular opinion but I really really dislike him. he's constantly flirting with someone behind Sally's back, I'd call that cheating, and yet you can never be upfront with him. I choose the friendliest options every time and yet he persists. 1/10
Jaden/Skylar - everyone's obsessed with Skylar and I haven't found him yet. curious to see what the hype is about. 5/10
Jamie/Seth - I've heard so little about these two. curious but only vaguely. 5/10
Jasmin/Kayla - pleasantly surprised by how much I like her? I feel like both their profiles don't reflect how they are in conversations at all. wish she and mc weren't such dumbasses tho. 5/10
Julien/William - match with me pls Julien. 6/10
Liam/Min-Jae - matched with Min-Jae briefly before I reset and I'm curious about his story, not sold yet. I'm not into kpop so it's interesting for mc to also be an outsider. 5/10
Michael/Sam - you are a child!!! I don't want to match with them tbh. 1/10
Nicholas - I like the concept but because mc keeps worrying he's pranking them, he sometimes reminds me of those people who are really into historical rp to the point where they pretend to not understand modern life. that da Vinci pic is hilarious. I wish you had the option to talk about being queer in the 18th century with him!! 6/10
Nick - ??? 4/10
Oliver/Stefan - no. 1/10
Raphael/Wyatt - Wyatt looks too much like Shaggy for me 😂 curious to talk to Raphael tho. 4/10
Sage/Vitoria - big titty goth gf. love her. she's not a werewolf yet in my game but I am waiting respectfully. also wish mc wasn't such an asshole after she ditches the first date. 8/10
Sheng/Tomas - idk enough. curious. 4/10
Theo - so mad I missed them. come back. be queer with me. 7/10
Tiros - as long as you don't think too much about how centaur sex works he is so much fun. sexy constantly shirtless man lost on a beach trying to reclaim his honour. sign me up. 6/10
22 notes · View notes
jensengirl83 · 4 years
Text
Prom Queen
Dean x plus size reader
Word count-2422
Warnings- Angst, body insecurities, unrequited feelings, fluffy ending
Summary- The reader is in love with Dean but knows he can never feel the same way about her. 
Thank you to @mariekoukie6661​ for showing me the song that inspired this.
Tumblr media
“Damn, I am glad that’s over!” Dean says from the front seat of Baby. This was a rough hunt, starting out being what we thought was going to be a simple salt and burn, turning into a three-day demon hunt.
“Tell me about it! I’m ready for a shower and a drink.” Sam agreeing with Dean to hitting up the local bar, proof enough this was hunt was shit show. “What about you Y/n? You coming with us?”
“Sure Sam.” I say quietly from the backseat, not really looking forward to another bar. It always turns out the same way, Dean picking up some random girl, while Sam just looks at me with pity on his face. I have been living and hunting with the Winchesters for a couple years now. Unfortunately, in those few years, I have fallen for Dean. A very stupid mistake, considering he will never feel the same about me. See, I am not what you would call a catch, too short, too much weight on my small frame. Nothing like the women Dean leaves the bars with. Sam knows my feelings for Dean, the eldest Winchester, not so much, and I want it to stay that way.
“What’s with the sour face Y/n? You look like someone just kicked your dog.” Dean thinks he’s funny, and he is most times. This moment is not one of the times I find funny.
“I’m fine Dean, just a little tired. This hunt sucked.” Of course, I’m not telling him the truth.
“Get a shower and a few drinks in you and you’ll feel better in no time.” His eyes on me through the rear-view mirror, that smile on his face that would make any woman drop her panties, me included.
“Whatever you say Winchester.” I smile back just wanting to end this conversation. The car ride falls silent as we make our way back to the hotel where we are staying. Sam has his nose in this phone, no doubt already trying to find another hunt. Dean singing along to his cassette while drumming his fingers on the steering wheel, the usual car ride. Why can’t I just forget how I feel and be able to enjoy the trips in Baby like I used to? I miss the joy I felt riding along with the boys before I caught feelings and ruined the fun. Sam keeps telling me to tell his brother how I feel, to just be honest. That would be ok if I could handle the look of rejection and disgust that would cover Dean’s face, but there is no way I could. I would have to leave, never to see him again, and the thought of that makes my heart ache. Not only because I love Dean so much, but because Sam has become my brother too. So I just keep my mouth shut and endure the torture of watching Dean with all his conquests.
“You coming Y/n/n?” The question from Sam pulling me from my thoughts, making me realize we are back to the hotel already.
“Yep, sorry, must be a little more tired than I thought.” The look Sam gives saying he knows I’m full of shit, but he doesn’t say anything. Thank Chuck he respects my wishes of keeping this to myself. Dean has already made it in the room getting his clothes to take to the bathroom for his shower.
“Better save me some hot water this time Dean.” I say as I throw my duffle to the bed.
“We could always shower together short stuff.” He says wiggling his eyebrows. I know it’s another one of his jokes, but oh how it hurts wishing he really meant it. He has always cracked this kind of jokes, but I know he would never really want me.
“In your dreams Winchester.” I roll my eyes but turn my back to him before he can see the look of heartache in my eyes.
“Just an offer sweetheart.” He winks moving into the bathroom closing the door. I collapse on the edge of the bed with my head in my hands. I really do not know how much longer I can go on like this. I feel the bed dip beside me and a big hand on my back. I look up to see Sam looking down at me with a heartfelt look of concern.
“Just talk to him Y/n. I hate seeing you like this.” His voice is soft and sincere.
“I can’t Sam. I cannot take the rejection from him. It would destroy me.” My voice breaking with the tears I am desperately trying to hold back.
“You don’t know he would reject you unless you talk to him Y/n. I will never understand why you think so low of yourself.”
“No, you wouldn’t Sam, no offense, but have you ever had someone tell you that you would be so beautiful if you just lost some weight? That they would love to date you if only you weren’t so big? No, I didn’t think so.” My voice getting a little too loud with my frustration. I stand to move to get my clothes ready to go straight to the shower as soon as Dean is done. This conversation only going to make it even harder to face Dean.
“Y/n….”
“Don’t Sam. I don’t want your pity, alright? I just want to get tonight over with so we can go home. Where I can go to my room and not have to look at him and know I’ll never be the one he wants. So just drop it please!” I feel horrible as soon as the words leave my mouth, not meaning to be so harsh with Sam. It’s not his fault I fell in love with his brother.
“What’s the yelling about in here?” Dean asks, walking out of the bathroom with only a towel wrapped around his hips. Fuck him for being so damn sexy!
“Ughh I’m taking a shower. You guys can go ahead with out me.” I brush past Dean, accidentally slamming my shoulder into him on my way to the bathroom, not really caring. I had to get out of that room.
“What the hell is going on with her?” I hear Dean ask Sam. I hold my breath, hoping I didn’t piss Sam off enough for him to spill the secret I am so desperate to keep.
“Not sure man. Maybe she really is just tired and ready to be back at the bunker.” Sam tells his brother. I release the breath I was holding, thank you Sam. I go through the motions, washing my hair, my body, shaving my legs, hoping they will be gone when I get out. I need a few minutes to regather myself before I go to the bar. I get out and get dressed, towel drying the dampness from my hair as I walk back into the room. They are gone, thank goodness. I sit down on the bed to gather my thoughts, but instead, I break into sobs. The emotions finally becoming too much to hold back. In the middle of my mental breakdown, I didn’t hear the hotel door open.
“Y/n sweetheart, what’s wrong?” I freeze, recognizing that voice instantly. Dean. Well fuck, this isn’t going to end well. He is at my side, his arms wrapped around me, definitely not helping the situation. “You gotta talk to me babe. Take a deep breath and let me help you.”
“You can’t help Dean, just go back to the bar.” I stand up to walk over and get a glass of whiskey, turning up the glass, chugging it all down. Hoping the burn from it will mask the other pain already in my chest.
“No, I’m not leaving until you talk to me. You have not been yourself in a long time. Don’t’ think I haven’t noticed Y/n.” Dean is now standing in front of me, arms crossed over his chest, a look of determination on that stupidly handsome face.
“Well congratulations for noticing. You want a cookie?” Sarcasm lacing my voice. I don’t’ want to be a bitch, but the reality that I am going to have to finally admit my feelings, both angers and scares me.
“Alright, that’s how you want to play this sweetheart? Fine.” Before I can even comprehend what he means, he has his arms around me, carrying me back to the bed. Placing me at the top of the bed against the headboard sitting on my legs so I cannot move. Damn him. “We are not moving from this spot until you talk Y/n.”
“I can’t tell you Dean, not this.” I lower my head, trying to hide the tears brimming back in my eyes. I hear him sigh, hoping will just give up, but I feel his finger under my chin lifting my face up to look at him.
“You can tell me anything darling. I will always be here for you.” His voice is so sincere, almost making me think he will not be absolutely disgusted if I tell him.
“Not if I tell you this Dean, it will change everything between us.” He smiles, moving his hand to cup my cheek.
“Nothing you can tell me will change how I see you sweetheart. Talk to me. Do you not trust me?” He looks so hurt that I don’t’ want to tell him. Well here it goes, sink or swim.
“Dean, I can’t keep going out with you and Sam. I hate it, watching all the women falling at your feet, the incessant flirting, watching you leave with woman after woman. I cannot do it anymore. I know I have no right telling you how to live your life, so I am just not going to do it anymore. I don’t want to be the ghost on the wall always disappearing. When we walk into the bars, the one getting noticed is not me. That is how it has always been for me. I was ok with it for a while, but I am not anymore. The jealousy that rattles my bones when I see you walk out the door with the women that I wish were me, breaks my heart Dean. I want to be the tall, beautiful, thin women that you want, but that will never be me. I will never have the long tone legs, the flat stomach, the beauty that catches your eye. I will always be the girl that will be your friend but nothing more. I love you Dean, and I know you will never feel the same. I will never be your Prom Queen.”
I am a sobbing mess, the confession I just let flow from my lips, draining me of everything I have. I can’t bring myself to look at him, the rejection I know is coming, making my stomach turn. Why did he have to come back? Everything is going to be different now. The thought kicking in my fight or flight instinct, flight definitely being the winner. Dean is still silent, his weight on my legs being the only way I know he is still here. I finally look up to see him staring, a look I can’t make out on his face. Are those tears in his eyes?
“Sweetheart…” His voice barely above a whisper.
“It’s ok Dean. You don’t have to say anything, I get it.”
“Obviously, you don’t get it Y/n. You really were oblivious, weren’t you?” Dean says with a small chuckle.
“What are you talking about Dean? Oblivious to what?” I am so confused right now.
“The way I feel about you sweetheart. I have been crazy about you for a long time. I kept throwing out the hints, but you would always blow me off. All those women were just a distraction Y/n. A horrible imitation for what I really wanted all this time, you.” I know my jaw is in my lap. All those times I thought he was just being flirty to be nice, he meant it.
“Dean..”
“No, listen to me sweetheart. All those people who made you feel anything less than the amazing, kick ass, sexy, beauty that you are, can go to hell. I love you too Y/n, and I will forever show you and tell you just how perfect I think you are if you will have me.”
I am speechless, can think of nothing to say. The way he is looking at me making me feel, for the first time in a long time, like I am good enough. That I am worthy enough to let this man love me. I finally break a smile, which must have been what he was waiting on. He cups my face in his hands, leaning in so close, our breaths mingling together.
“Can I kiss you baby?”
Baby
That word leaving those soft pouty lips, driving me wild. I don’t give him an audible answer. I reply by crashing my lips to his. His lips even softer than I had imagined, a perfect fit to mine. Our kiss is slow and sweet, no rush, just enjoying the feeling of what we have both longed for. We break apart after what seems like forever, the need for air becoming to strong to ignore. Dean leans his forehead to mine, placing soft pecks on my lips, not wanting to completely break apart from each other.
“How about we call in a night?” Dean asks running his hand over my head.
“You don’t want to go back to the bar?” I look to see him with a bright smile lighting up his face.
“Everything I want is right here in this room sweetheart.” He has his hand behind my neck pulling me in for another light kiss. I pull away to nod my head. Staying here with him is much more appealing than a bar. Dean wraps his arms around me, maneuvering us to lie down with him behind me. This is a dream come true, being here with him, his arms around me, knowing he feels the same way.
“I love you Y/n. Get some rest darling.”
“I love you too Dean. Good night.”
The exhaustion of the hunt and the breakdown I had, has me drifting off fast. I feel Dean placing kisses to my hair, his breath ghosting over my neck. I am almost asleep when I hear him speak, so low I almost missed it.
“You will always be my Prom Queen, Y/n.”
Tags: @flamencodiva​ @waywardbeanie​ @emoryhemsworth​ @sorenmarie87​ @foxyjwls007​ @voltage-my2dlove​
229 notes · View notes