#anonymous assistant

[ask-winston-byrd]

Hey Winston, why are you so goobie woobie?

My-my first ask! Thank y-you for the quest-you for the question! As for answ-answering, my assistant said this is a compl-complimen-complimentary statement. I apologize for my-my-my outdated understan- understanding of modern Toon speak, but I try my best- my best to be as "g-g-goobie woobie" as possible! It is my job- it is my job to connect our sides and represent our company after-after all!

-Winston Byrd, Public Relations Representative

[incognitopolls]

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[demonic0angel]

I KNOW, I sound... Obsessed with City Spirit Danny WHICH I AM. But I still like to imagine he has a large veil much like Secretive Plotter but if that's the case. What if Jazz had MANY halos. And I still want to see a ship. And I know what you ship so Imagine Dead Silent and Anger Management and Both Jason and Cass meet Danny and Jazz(different Occasions) and fall for these mesmerizing beauties <333

Lmaoooo it’s funny how much you like this AU XD Ask me this again when my wrist feels better bc I’m going to draw them for you 😭

ASDFGHJKLL MY PREDICTABLE SHIPS (however, I will add that I actually ship almost anyone with Danny. There are like,,, 5+ ships with Danny in my blog somewhere and only 1 with Jazz lmao)

Oooh, I imagine that Jazz being the Crime Alley Spirit means that she helps out Jason a lot and this could branch out into the assistant Jazz AU. Meanwhile, Danny is helping the rest of Gotham. When he meets Cass, who can’t read him, she gets curious because he seems so familiar and kind and then she follows him around to investigate. Ensue a lot of moments where Cass joins in helping him and they both learn more about trust and kindness together and become another symbol of hope within Gotham.

[canisalbus]

What kind of clothes would Vasco wear after Machete's death? He tends to wear bright and warm colors, and I was wondering if he would start wearing dark and cool colors to reflect his inner state

I also had thought that he might start to veer towards more somber shades. In reality, late 16th century fashion was dominated by dark colors, if you look at portraits from late renaissance/early baroque eras you quickly notice that pitch black was the most fashionable color (compare that to early and high renaissance fashion from 1400 to 1550 which was visibly more vibrant and colorful). I might be bending the timeline a little bit by having him dress in vivid blues with gold accents, but it's his signature style and I think it mirrors his luminous, free-spirited and approachable personality well. After Machete's death he might've experienced a period where jewel tones had lost their luster to him.

[starmocha]

horny zayne thoughts:

he's obsessed with mc's entire body but there's just something about her breasts that makes him lose it. he loses his mind when she's riding him and he's sucking her nipples, alternating between one and the other.

he loves when she's about to get her period and her nipples are extra sensitive. she's the one who begs him to suck on them and she trusts him to apply just the right amount of pressure and be completely in tune with the way her body responds. he knows exactly what hiss means keep going, it hurts so fucking good and what hiss means too much. when it's the latter he chooses to run his tongue on them and she melts all the same.

countless lunch breaks have been spent locked inside his office, with her stradling his leg, riding his thigh while he's got her shirt up, sucking on her very sensitive breasts while she's jerking him off. they don't have time to do more than that sometimes but it's one of his favorite things. he always makes sure she comes first, flexing the muscles on his thigh as she rides it faster, suckling on her nipples like the devoted man he is. when she comes, she falls onto him for a few seconds, just to catch her breath and then she slides down between his legs to swallow him whole and let him finish inside her mouth (it has to be this way, she reasons, when they're in his office. he comes a lot and always makes a mess, they still have work, can't risk him shooting his load on her face and having it drip, ruining her clothes. or his. but he does keep spare clothes for them both in his office, just in case they get carried away.)

another thought is that, during traffic, he really loves squeezing her thigh. sometimes it's just really innocent, she'll feed him snacks at a red light while he holds her hand and right before he needs to move again, he lets go of her hand and squeezes her thigh playfully.

other times, especially during road trips while they're on a highway, his large hand is back on her thigh and it stays there until he needs to either stop or make a turn or change gears. when she wants him, she holds his wrist, gives it a squeeze too. he lets her guide his hand, always with a smirk on his face. he always warns her to behave, especially when she decides to run her hand on him too. there's no better euphoria then when she palms him through his pants, feeling how hard he is, watching the way his breath hitches and how he closes his eyes for just one tiny second. and he's a patient man, sure, but he never fails to take the first chance he gets to find a secluded spot to park the car and have her there.

it's like he falls in love all over again when she climbs on him giggling and giving him quick, noisy kisses while he says she's going to drive him insane. she counters with a "you can punish me later" and he really loses it. 💕

Thank you, I was starved and this was absolutely delicious and hitting all of my fetishes especially the titties tlc 😩

[adobe-outdesign]

I like the idea that humans aren’t the smartest species in Pokémon, but the intelligent psychic types essentially looked at how hard humans work and all the problems they have and said, “nah, I’ll pass,” to evolving past being pets or having small, primitive settlements in the wild.

One day an Alakazam debated on starting its own society. Then it saw humans paying taxes and was like "lmao fuck that"

[darkkbluee]

L for Minister AU

Light Yagami is desperate to know L's name and face. To know everything about his nemesis ("So I can kill him! Ryuk, stop laughing!"). And so, he turns on the TV, sees the promo video for the upcoming elections and thinks...

L would have to show up in person, unmasked and with his real name, if he was an elected Minister.

A few hours of paperwork filed anonymously and through a shady lawyer, a few hours of hacking and anonymous donations, and The Great Detective L is the latest minister candidate, running as an independent.

L does not know how or why he is suddenly running in the elections. Was this even legal? He wasn't even a citizen! Surely no one would vote for a candidate with no public appearances, a profile page with no photo, obviously overblown promises in propaganda -

Apparently, they would.

[aroaceleovaldez]

what do you think about the charters (Nico, Percy and others) using mobility aids? (Especially after all the wars, fights, and other general injures they've probably got over the years)

I may be biased as someone who uses mobility aids, but I definitely think more demigods should have mobility aids in general. Nico in particular definitely could use it with how often he collapses and with how he generally exhibits some symptoms of low blood pressure at the very least if not POTS or EDS. I'm particularly biased to drawing him with my own crutches, lol (they have knee rests!!!!).

Also I always love seeing Grover with crutches. He was introduced as having a muscular disease - i know that's implied to be just cause he's actually a satyr, but also he's the only satyr to be described as "walking like every step hurt." So give him crutches!!!! He needs them!!!

I dont have any particularly strong opinions for other characters, except maybe usually giving Leo a prosthetic leg so he can thematically match his dad and sometimes crutches alongside that, and my friends and I have talked about Jason using a rollator before, particularly in Jason Lives!AUs. But regardless I always love discussing comorbidity between various other conditions and disabilities with ADHD and dyslexia and a not insignificant number of those comorbidities may require mobility aids. Functionally demigods are kind of more like intensive athletes with magic healthcare, and very few are on the level of like Nico where they've been through the wringer so much that it has lasting effects on them - actually very few in general seem to get a lot of physical damage that doesn't get healed quickly (i think in part cause most campers don't actually go on quests). mostly just psychological damage - so i don't think every demigod would need mobility aids, but like statistically there should probably be more just given the comorbidity stuff to begin with. Everybody who's come back from the dead should probably have more going on with them though imo.

[flightyalrighty]

this is probably something youve answered either here or somewhere else, correct me if im wrong, but how many of the comic panels / art do u have done before release day on thursdays? like how far do you normally get? thank you!

Each page takes a full week for me to create, and sometimes I'm working until 10-11pm, sometimes even as late as working until midnight, just to make sure I've got a page ready in time.

That's why, occasionally, I need to take two weeks for a page. It is what it is! I hope to learn how to get faster!

[skunkes]

this is going to sound insane but do you have the photo of the rodent thing raising its arms in rejoice from the tumblr post of mutuals getting 0.00002 mL of juice as a treat

I know exactly what post ur talking about but idk if i have it reblogged and i dont have the image 😔

Edit: yey

[ask-winston-byrd]

OK NO MORE ENCLOSED SPACES, NOTED, ARE YOU OK???? NEED HUGS?!?! (wait those are enclosed spaces…) GIVE THIS COG 2MILES OF EMPTY SPACE AND LEAVE HIM BE!!!!

It-It-It-It's Fi-i-ine! Yo-ou did not- did not-not know-ow-ow! I ap-ap-appreciate the concern HA. HA. HA.,,, Al-al-also, hug-hugs are fi-fi-fine if th-th-they don't-'t last too-too-too lo-o-o-ong

-Winston Byrd, Public Relations Representative

[total-drama-brainrot]

Saw this somewhere and wanted to throw it your way, sorry if you’ve been asked this before but what do you think of the concept of Noah always having been an assistant (even before the first season)/never playing as a contestant would look like?

The thing about Noah as a contestant is that he's, for all intents and purposes, kind of useless. And by that I mean Noah as a character isn't important to the plot at all in the grand scheme of things. He's barely important from an episodic point of view either; Noah does very little throughout Total Drama in terms of story relevance, and just in general. (Lazy king 👑.)

So taking him out of the equation wouldn't really affect too much in the grand scheme of things, save for probably preventing his friendship with Owen and, from a fanon standpoint, the rest of team E-scope. He'd be pretty much the same person, just behind the camera instead of on it.

But that's kind of a boring answer, and not at all what you were looking for, right?

So, let's say that Noah lands himself a job working as the personal assistant for some hot-shot A-list celebrity through one of his many siblings' various contacts; is it nepotism? Probably. But who's Noah to look a gift horse in the mouth? A fairly easy job following some pretentious asshole around all day and grabbing him the occasional coffee sounds like a pretty sweet gig, especially with the salary and various benefits that come with the job description. So Noah takes the job without question.

And that's how he finds himself stuck in the middle of nowhere, Muskoka, on an undisclosed island owned by said A-lister whilst he films the first season of his new Reality TV show, Total Drama Island.

Being Chris' personal assistant was supposed to be an easy pay check. "Supposed to be" being the point of interest there; Noah didn't anticipate Chris being as sadistic or as childishly needy as he was. If he wasn't running around like a headless chicken trying to accommodate for Chris' oftentimes outlandish whims and fancies, he was stuck answering to the producers in the host's stead- and the producers were pissed with Chris more often than not for his frivolous use of the show's budget. Something about having a genius level IQ and enough snark to make grown men cry apparently made him qualified enough to deal with the industry big-wigs. Noah was far too overworked to question it.

So much for an easy pay check.

Noah's not bad at his job by any means. In his professional opinion, the whole show and Chris' career would be in the dumps without his personal input keeping everything afloat. That doesn't mean he doesn't loathe his job with every sleep-deprived inch of his being.

And, inevitably, Noah ends up spending a lot of time around the campers themselves. Mostly as a consequence of always having to remain "on set" so to speak, since Noah's pretty much contractually obligated to linger around Chris' vicinity and wait for his boss to assign him some menial task to do. Most of the campers are just as egocentric and insufferable as he'd first assumed- and honestly, what else would he expect from people who singed up for a Reality TV show?- but a select few turn out to be decent company; namely Owen and Eva (and Izzy, but Noah refuses to admit that the "Psycho Hose Beast" is actually bearable to be around).

He'd even go so far as to claim they were friends good acquaintances.

Of course, his job takes precedent over frivolous things like relationships, platonic or otherwise, so Noah doesn't exactly have the free time to hang out with them. Which is probably for the best considering if he did spend a lot of time around his friends acquaintances, the other contestants would have a solid enough foundation for accusations of foul play in the competition, and that's a headache Noah really doesn't want to deal with.

Consequently, Noah floats through the filming of Island, and later on Action, maintaining cordiality with his little group and cold indifference towards pretty much the rest of the cast. Not that he doesn't keep close tabs on the campers; of course he does, not only is Noah incredibly observant by nature, but he's also the one in charge of accommodating for these weirdos... plus, Chris is oddly invested in his "prize cast of ratings jewels", whatever that means. So Noah knows these people, probably more than some of them know themselves, thanks to a combined sixteen-ish weeks of observation and forced proximity.

In turn, the competitors know of Noah, though for the most part he's regarded as little more than a spectre on set- Chris' elusive personal assistant who the cast will occasionally see the barest glimpse of, usually hidden behind an impassive pair of mirrored sunglasses and, more often than not, rushing off to do whatever it is a PA does. Chris does get a little lazy in Action and on a few occasions does get Noah to make a "guest appearances" on screen- mostly just to deliver him a coffee and a gluten free muffin during the downtime of that day's challenge- but he's still practically non-existent to he majority of the cast.

Which is fine by him.

What isn't fine by him is the surprise addition of two people he knows nothing about, come the third season.

One of those contestants happens to know a lot about the cast, and a concerning amount of information about him. It's uncanny, just how much Sierra seems to know about everyone around her, even more so because of the way she practically worships the ground they walk on. Sure, Noah's encountered the odd super fan here and there- not fans of himself, of course, but in this time as Chris' assistant he's had to chase off more than enough rabid fans from trying to sneak their way onto the set of whatever show Chris was working on (or more accurately sic the on-scene security on them)- but Sierra's brand of crazy takes it to a whole new level. Noah doesn't like her on principle and is both incredibly vindicated and incredibly concerned when her stalkerish behaviour rears its ugly head. Not that he's allowed to do anything about it; the producers are adamant that Sierra's outlandish behaviour is entertaining enough for the audience to ignore the immorality, and given how much Chris has been allowed to get away with in the past Noah's inclined to begrudgingly agree.

And the other new contestant? The one who qualified for the apparently non-existent Total Drama Dirtbags (and Noah totally isn't salty about that show being an elaborate ruse that he spent countless sleepless nights working on)? Noah's just as concerned about his friends acquaintances ignorance to Alejandro's inherent sliminess as he is about Sierra's blatant disregard for others' privacy, but again it's not like he can do anything about it. He's not even supposed to be on the show, so any sort of interference would be a big no-no.

Oh, what's that? They want him on the show?

Fuck.

Turns out, Noah's brief appearances during Action (characterised by his usual level of sass and snide comments) really resonated with their audience; they like him for some inexplicable reason, and want to see more of "Noah, Chris McLean's mysterious personal assistant".

So he's pretty much forced into acting as a co-host of sorts, much like Chef had done for the first two seasons, all whilst carrying out his usual tasks. Is he happy about this? Not a chance in hell, and he lets the producers know exactly how he feels about the sudden change in his contract. Not that it changes anything.

And the best part? World Tour is a musical themed season. If they expect him to sing, they've got another thing coming.

But, as a small part of him chimes in, spending more time on camera would give Noah plenty of opportunities to spend time with his friends acquaintances. There's a non-zero chance that he could have fun, even if it's at the expense of his valued privacy.

His new status as part of the show does allow Noah some opportunities to skew the competition in the favour of his friends acquaint- no, screw it, his friends. That's one silver lining of the whole situation.

Better yet, he can tilt things out of Alejandro's favour, since the former Dirtbag seems to have a knack for manipulating the competition anyway- Noah might as well make things more challenging for him, as it seems this game is too easy for him thus far.

[harveylikestoart]

For the jade assistant au - what was mk's life like before he met pjf?

Probably hopping from place to place.

He got distracted by a bug that splatted onto his face and some old lady took care of him before a demon nabbed him which their subordinate felt bad about so they handed him to their relative who worked at PJF’s court and boom. Here we are.

All this because of the literal butterfly effect…

[cripplecharacters]

Hello! I recently decided to visit a bunch of character concepts and artwork I did when I was younger. One of them was this pretty girl that used a wheelchair, but, I noticed how long her dress was. I watched a couple of vids by wheelchair users, they had made me realize the fabric and length could hinder her travelling and transferring (especially to the toilet) so I decided to change it into a skirt buuut I still have to wonder if that was a good choice... should I opt for a shorter dress?(and provide her a bag or pillow to avoid flyaways) Those pants with fluttery ends?(if I can't go for a dress I'd like to go for something that gives an illusion of it) Something I didn't mention?

Hello,

Maybe a dress with a slimmer skirt for the length issue, because a length issue is usually more of an "it's too baggy" issue. It doesn't have to be a pencil skirt type of dress, but a slightly-modified maxi skirt could work. You can also create a subtle skirt, a shirt and a skirt that match up and look like a dress, which should help with transferring. If you use a few barriers to block the dress from getting tangled in the wheels (barriers at the sides of the leg rests, etc,) all you'd really need to worry about with the style of the skirt is making sure it's not so long that it drags on the floor.

I would definitely recommend giving her either a subtle skirt or a dress with magnetic closures down the back or sides in order to to make taking it off and going to the bathroom easier. Not even because she's disabled, but because those are horrible things to deal with when wearing a dress.

Mod Aaron

[doumadono]

you're a fucking bitch for not accepting emergency requests during christmas time. selfish cunt. I hope you rot in hell, fucking pig

Initially, I had half a mind to ignore this message, you know, let it drift into the abyss of unread notifications. But then, on the flip side, I figured it might be worth my precious time to drop a line or two and enlighten you on a couple of things.

About six months ago, I graciously introduced emergency requests as a feature on my blog. Since then, I've effortlessly tackled nearly 80 emergency requests, rejecting just one which contained explicit content. I'm consistently available when others need to let off steam, doing my utmost to lend a listening ear and offer advice.

You see, I'm practically donating my personal time to craft these requests and provide a dash of solace to those desperately in need of it. I want to clarify that my availability to fulfill requests may be limited during certain times, including holidays, due to personal commitments or high demand.

Listen up, you self-righteous hypocrite. Calling me names just because I need a bit of time for myself? That's some next-level hypocrisy right there :) Thanks to folks like you, I'm seriously contemplating shutting down emergency requests as the new year kicks in.

In case you haven't noticed, I've got a truckload on my plate. I'm waging a freaking war against leukemia, juggling the responsibilities of raising kids, and still, I manage to get back to work to help my patients going through awful situations. And what do I get in return? Your snide remarks? Bitch please.

I usually brush off stupid comments, but your words hit a nerve today. I bust my ass to aid others, often when I'm feeling worse than low. Am I being selfish now? Damn right I am. But who can blame me?

As for those emergency requests, who the heck knows? The decision will be made by the end of the year. Right now, I'm feeling lower than low, and I don't have the time or patience to deal with this crap. So, do me a favor and save your judgment for someone who gives a damn. If you're feeling a bit Grinchy, maybe a cup of cocoa or some jolly tunes will do the trick.

[animatronic-assistant]

Dumb poll to satiate my curiosity