#anxiety tips and tricks

[thatsbelievable]

[lachiennearoo]

How to Make Friends

A more-or-less clear guide on social interactions

Growing up with heavy ADHD and generalized anxiety, it was always a bit hard for me to make friends and socialize. Despite my yearning for friendship, I was always "the quiet one" and "a loner", simply because I didn't know how to approach certain social situations, and it made any friendship I had extremely unstable (except for my sister @vive-le-quebec-flouffi, who was so extroverted and friendly it was literally impossible to escape her clutches of socialization)

As I grew older, I learned through a lot of trial and error what makes a good friendship.

Or, rather... what's the best way for someone to WANT to be your friend (without being superficial or hypocritical.)

Now, obviously, this doesn't work for everyone. But this is what I found helped me the most in social circles (especially online) and I hope it can help others too

LET'S BEGIN!

1 - Be yourself

Now that sounds very cliche and cringe, I know, but hear me out, because my opinion on this is not the same as all those feelgood inspirational movies and ads.

"Being yourself" isn't as simple as it seems. Because after all, what does "self" imply? If someone is, say, a criminal, would "be yourself" mean that they should embrace their sinful side?

No, obviously not.

"Be yourself" is a bit more nuanced, but I'll try to boil it down for you.

It just means "be unashamed of your qualities which you think are flaws". For example, "be yourself" would apply to someone who sees themselves as ugly, or maybe someone with an odd yet unharmful hobby, or a weird sense of fashion, or someone with say a handicap, a speech impediment. "Be yourself" is a sentence for the specific people who have genuine good in them, but are afraid to show it to others because they have been persecuted in the past, or are scared to be. It does NOT mean to accept genuine flaws. "Be yourself" does not include say violent anger issues, an addiction, a recent crime committed, or a generally unpleasant personality. Those are obviously not things to encourage. You can understand they may be a thing that happen to you, and accept it in your life, but that's different from being proud of it or encouraging it.

Speaking of personalities... let's talk about that

2 - Be kind

Now when some people hear that, they think it means "always smile no matter what, always look happy and positive, always agree with everyone just so you don't hurt their feelings, and never cause any drama", like you're Deku in My Hero Academia or Steven Universe in his titular show.

But that's... not quite that.

Obviously, kindness is something you use to help people feel better, to cheer up, and feel happy, and obviously to be kind, you need to have compassion, heart, empathy, and always put yourself in other people's shoes regardless of who they are. But it is not necessarily all-encompassing.

There's a rule that I think anyone learning kindness must learn. It's that sometimes, kindness means to be firm.

Not mean, of course. Not judgmental, not insensitive. Don't insult anyone, don't belittle or patronize anyone or make them feel inferior to you. That's still very rude and that's not what you want.

But what I mean is that sometimes, if you know that a person's actions towards something are wrong, especially if it's towards someone else, you must be able to point it out, and act accordingly. Don't just stand there and agree with them just because you don't want to hurt their feelings. You must still be able to know right from wrong. Kindness just means you won't be an ass about it, it doesn't mean to stay silent.

Hey, that brings me to point three!

3 - Show your own opinions

If there's one thing people hate just as much as meanness, it's those who stand by and do nothing about it.

Regardless of if you agree with them or not, if you say absolutely nothing when genuinely bad behaviour is happening, out of fear of "starting a fight", you are actively making the person who is being attacked feel alone.

I remember myself, when I was bullied in the first two grades of secondary school (11-13 years old for those who don't know) for "being ugly", I was told by my mother (who was friends with other kid's parents) that some of the kids "didn't hate me" and "didn't agree with the bullying". And I asked her "if they don't hate me, why won't they talk to me?" She never managed to answer that one. And it broke my heart, because outside of my sister, I had no one else.

Don't be like that. You may be scared of acting, but you know who would be grateful if you did act? The victims. And isn't their opinion of you much more important than the opinion of someone who acts with hatred and bigotry?

If you see someone suffering injustice, or even just hear someone who has a rather harmful opinion, don't be scared to tell them that you disagree. Obviously don't be an asshole about it, stay civil, but if you voice out your opinion, you will be seen as someone who stays true to their beliefs and is brave enough to stand up for them if the opportunity comes.

There's obviously much more that comes with social life (nonverbal cues, sense of humor, timing and mood), and I don't know everything (I'm just some random québécois girl on the internet). But I hope this was a bit more helpful. I did have fun writing this, at least. So I guess that's better than nothing!

[abd-illustrates]

How to DRAW your own 3D models! | Blender TIPS + TRICKS

I don’t often do full-on tutorials like this, but I’ve really caught the 3D-art bug recently and wanted to talk about this fun new sketching method I’ve been trying to pick up! 

Feels good to be back behind the mic after spending so long working non-stop on secret project stuff lol - I still have a little ways to go on all that, but for now I hope y’all can enjoy going on this lil’ learning journey with me! ✨

🍁 LINKS 🍁

[thenerdytomboy]

Maybe I'm late to this(being I've been drawing consistently for about two years now)

But

To any new artists who may come across this-

Let yourself have those shit drawings

Just doodle things with no intent of showing anyone, worst case scenario you can still show them if you think they're funny/still look good enough

Let yourself have those doodle sheets filled with half-assed ideas that make no sense and are just cool to you

Not every piece you create has to be posted or shown off to anyone other than yourself and MAYBE some friends if YOU are comfortable with doing so

The best way to improve after all is to just fuck up and observe so you can think of what to try fix to improve

Practice makes Progress after all

[glorious-blackout]

Daily migraines are something I really didn't need in my life, but my useless body has decided to grace me with them anyway 😭

[tailoroffates]

Anxiety Brain Fog and Tips to Defeat it!

Hey-hi! I’m back again to chat about yet another aspect of anxiety!  Anxiety brain fog… Anxiety brain fog can happen when a person is feeling anxious and it causes difficulty thinking clearly/concentrating. It’s common to experience brain fog when dealing with stressful situations, or while an individual experiences high stress in general. So, why does anxiety cause brain fog? Well, it typically happens because anxiety takes up a lot of mental resources. This makes it so people need to use more energy while trying to focus on anything other than that anxiety, which is why it makes it so difficult to concentrate or think clearly.

Symptoms of anxiety brain fog include:

Fatigue

An inability to organize thoughts or activities performed

Feeling confused or “spaced out”

Being easily distracted

Forgetfulness, or a constant loss of your train of thought

Having difficulty finding the right words

Processing thoughts slower than usual

Forgetting about a task you need to complete

Needing more time to complete basic tasks

So basically, anxiety brain fog creates a forgetful mental state affected by your anxiety. The more anxious you get, the harder it becomes to focus. It usually happens when you go to do something that you know makes you anxious, and it makes preparing for that task much harder than it needs to be. There are other causes for anxiety brain fog, meaning things that can make it more likely to affect you. These are:

Neurological conditions, like head injuries or dementia.

Some chronic illnesses

Dehydration, hunger, or vitamin deficiencies

Drugs and alcohol

Certain medications, like chemotherapy or mood stabilizers.

So the gist of the situation is, if it isn’t anxiety induced then you should do your best to take good care of yourself and if that doesn’t help, seek out medical attention that could provide better answers for your condition. Now, since the brain fog is a symptom and not a medical diagnosis there is no treatment for it that I am aware of. Though, managing the anxiety or the conditions causing the brain fog may help. I’m no medical professional or therapist, but as a fellow struggler of anxious tendencies, I happen to have a few tips to help you along the way.

My tips: 1.  Make a checklist and actively run through it before heading out to ensure you don’t stray off track. 2. Try to prepare ahead of time, or leave the things you need near the door where you can see them. Sometimes visual cues can help to re-spark your memory and clear the fog enough to set you back on the right path. 3.  Work on methods to slow or calm your anxiety. Giving your brain less to focus on can help redirect your attention towards what you need, instead of what you’re afraid of or anxious about. The tips I mentioned above are my personal methods of clearing, or at the very least, working through my own anxiety brain fog. I hope this information helps you find your own path to victory VS the foggy brain feels <3 Unfortunately, that’s all I have for you today, but for those of you who have your own tips for working through anxiety brain fog, I’d love to hear about them and how they help you in the comments or tags! Sharing is caring!

[0ffbeatqueer]

Random Story Time!

My friend has been having some trouble making friends at college. One of her biggest issues is basically being too nervous to say hi back to people, so I jokingly said that she should make business cards. We laughed about it and such and I'm sure she thought I was mostly joking (if you're my friend, you know that there's always a slight chance of me being 100% serious), but I have a deep dedication to committing to the bit.

Which brings us to the image above. Obviously I had to censor her information but the message is still there :)

I thought it was hilarious and was fully prepared for her to just keep laughing but she's printed and cut a bunch of them out and we went over plans on how to give them to people without causing her more anxiety and now I guess she has business cards for when people say hi to her in the halls and she panics? Which is honestly such a vibe to think of someone receiving one of these and I hope she follows through

TLDR: if you're too anxious to say hello in the halls, a simple business card stating you have anxiety might do the trick!

[taegularities]

jfc i want to write and answer asks so bad, but i am feeling so sick to my stomach bc of this freaking anxiety, i can't think straight or breathe

[depresseddepot]

I'm trying to find ways to slowly ease my way into taking walks (debilitating social anxiety) so I was going to download pokemon go again but my phone is too old :(

[brainfugk]

Now I realised, that listening to the same song on repeat is a stress/anxiety response. To be able to predict the sounds should've calming effect.

(should've, but actually isn't helping anymore)

Sooo

My question is - what should I try next?

[thatsbelievable]

[kikozsstuff]

I hate myself so much, I used to be at the gw of 130lbs. Everyone used to admire me and how fast I lost weight, ofc it’s was because of how little at if I ate anything at all. But now I am fat and ugly again, I can’t even stand to look at myself in the mirror because I’m fucking disgusting to look at. I hope to at least to get to my goal weight by the end of March and by then I better have a smaller waist or else I will start losing it

[seesgood]

nah but like, the subtle slide into the Bad Space of mental health is so uniquely weird bc i didn’t get crushed by the wave, i just got very gently eased under until it’s like hm, am i? drowning a little? oh shit

( it’s all good. we’re good. 🐼 have a panda for your troubles. 🐼 )

[avoidace]

I have unique way of lighting up a room. My secret?

Matches

[californiaquail]

genuinely has anyone made like a folder or powerpoint to give to new therapists and did it work. i'm tired of going through the traumatic events complex family dynamics and adverse childhood experiences spiel every time

[themidnightfox]

Having a panic attack cause I can't remember if I did something important, I keep telling myself I can't do anything about it in the moment so there's no point in worrying, but it's not working, anyone know ways to help?

You