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ap0llonian · 1 month

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Park Follies

PERCY JACKSON x Apollo!READER

sypnosis: you don't like the rides percy's taking you for your “friendly” themepark date, until you head for the ferris wheel.

notes: reader is, again, a child of apollo, reader is gender neutral, reader is very judgemental, fluff, friends to lovers, ferris wheel trope

a/n: took the pic from a manhwa called operation: true love!

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The sun was already setting, beaming down on the theme park, and you couldn't contain your excitement as you navigated through the vibrant seas of people. Every corner of the park pulsed with energy, from the screaming rollercoasters to the colorful stalls lining the walkways.

But the rides Percy led you to were... not so thrilling. You were a child of the God of—many things! You were the embodiment of fun. He must've lacked the “humor literature.”

“This ride is seriously lacking,” you declared, shaking him with an insistent grip. “I thought you would show me something that could really make my adrenaline pumping, not just a slow spin on a plastic horse.”

Percy smirked, shaking his head. “It’s a carousel, not a roller coaster. Not everything can be an epic adventure.”

“My point still stands.” You shrugged with a grin.

The day continued with a mix of roller coasters, carnival games, and food stands. Every ride you encountered seemed to get an immediate and loud critique from you. You had a special way of making even the simplest attractions sound like the worst thing ever. Despite your constant complaints, Percy remained as patient as ever—only staring at you with an underlying tone of something you couldn't seem to shake.

As you approached another game stall, your attention was completely captured by a prize displayed on the table. It was a plushie that had the exact features of Percy—and with no problems, you got it.

“Wow, it’s got the same hair as him too...” You muttered, fiddling with the knitted clothes. It was removable too—who does that?

“Look, Jackson, it looks exactly like y—”

Turning around, you'd only seen a random kid staring up at you with the stink eye (what a bitch.)

Your heart dropped, and your eyes immediately started darting to her surroundings, trying to find the supposedly, very spottable son of Poseidon. He was nowhere to be found. Like, literally. Too many people to even find him.

“That guy!” You grumbled to yourself as you rammed through the seas of unfamiliar faces, muttering a few apologies to whom you had accidentally bumped into.

None. None. None!

He was nowhere to be found, making you even more agitated.

Minutes stretched on, each one feeling like an eternity. Your eyes darted back and forth, scanning every black haired guy. The thrill of the games and rides seemed like a distant memory now, replaced by a gnawing worry.

“He’s—” There he finally was, standing in line for the ferris wheel. He seemed so nonchalant, with a pack of pretzels—he didn’t even think to tell you!

Relief (with a mixture of irritation) flooded through you, and you rushed over to him.

“Percy, where have you been?!” You demanded, grabbing a hold of his arm with a vice-like grip. “I was about to organize a search party! You can’t just leave me like that!”

He, clearly taken aback by your sudden outburst, raised his hands in a placating gesture. “Sorry, sorry! I was just saving a spot for us on the ferris wheel.”

“Next time, tell me where you’re going!” You scolded, reaching up to tug on his reddening ear.

He nodded, an apologetic smile on his face, and led you to the ferris wheel. As you climbed on one of the cabs, you noticed the slight shiver to his body, even under the weight of his jacket. His hands started to pale, a contrast to yours.

“You seem cold,” you muttered, trying to lighten up the wilting mood.

“Nah, I’m alright.” Percy assured with a shake of his head, and sat in the opposite direction as you.

You didn’t buy it—not when the blood on his palm was starting to go away. You unwrapped the scar around your neck and rose from your seat. Without hesitation, you wrapped it around his neck, hoping to provide some comfort.

His eyes slightly widened, and he instinctively grabbed your wrists. “No, I’m okay. You keep it—”

“Percy, just take the scarf. You look like you’re about to turn into an ice sculpture.” You deadpanned, your eyes staring directly at his. The once glowing aura of yours seemed to darken along with the sun setting, making the atmosphere more—intimate, ish.

With a resigned sigh, he gave in, accepting the scarf and wrapping it around his shoulders. The two of you settled into the cab as the ferris wheel began its slow ascent, the view of the park unfolding below you.

The sky transitioned from bright blue to soft oranges and pinks, creating a breathtaking backdrop that framed the scene perfectly. The fading light bathed the scene in a soft, romantic light, enhancing the atmosphere.

“Dad would’ve loved it here. The view is breathtaking!” You said as your eyes landed on the little people below you. “Even if—”

Before you could finish your dramatic musing, Percy’s gaze fixed on you with an intensity that made your breath hitch. There was something in his expression, a mix of hesitation and longing, that made you pause.

“Percy, what’s wrong? You okay?” You asked and leaned in slightly with narrowed eyes, trying to find anything out of the ordinary on his face.

Well, none. He was perfect.

Your cheeks started to heat up—and not from the temperature, but from his gaze. You turned your head to fully face him, mouth opening to speak. But then—

His lips press against yours, for just a moment. A very long moment. It was gentle but filled with an unspoken deoth that made your heart race.

You then reeled back, staring at him wide-eyed and gaped. You couldn’t even notice the faint tint of pink spreading across his cheeks, embarrassed by the sudden intimacy.

“I’m sor... what?” Your words died on your tongue, which was unlikely of you. You were usually so talkative.

Not here, though. Your breath was utterly taken away.

“Y-yeah... sorry, I’m so sorry.” He stammered softly, his hand flying to his mouth.

You cleared your throat, not being able to hear the incoherent and muffled apologies and explanations coming out of his mouth. Your mind was trying to process this whole thing.

You weren’t mad; quite the opposite. You felt... giddy. The same feeling with your father when he was with his past lover—but you didn’t know that. The author just wanted to add that for references.

Albeit, your fingers slightly twitched, almost wanting to do something you might regret. But you only live once, right?

So, with no hesitation, you grabbed the ends of the scarf and pulled Percy in for another... well, kiss. Your lips meshed into each other perfectly, the softness of it making you melt. The kiss was longer, a little more passionate, and it conveyed everything you had been feeling throughout the day.

When you finally broke apart, the both of you were breathless, staring at one another with flushed cheeks and bewildered expressions. You kissed Percy Jackson.

A shy smile managed to dance across his lips, “So, how’s the view?”

You grinned and gently pushed his face away, averting your gaze to the ground.

“Definitely better now.”

#percy jackson and the olympians x reader #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson x you #oneshot #pjo hoo toa #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackson and the heroes of olympus #pjo x reader

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olderthannetfic · 4 months

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Sometimes I see the latest fandom wank about heteronormative this and comphet that because someone put the wrong bishonen on top in a fic, and I just think about how my great great grandfather was probably asexual, possibly gay.

I think about how ace people can fall in love. I think about ace people can want to become parents. But I also think about how, in my great great grandfather's time, it wasn't normal for a man to be single. It wasn't normal for him to not want to marry and become a father.

I think about how he married three times and only had one child. I think about the shameful whispers from my grandparents about how he was probably gay, but no one can point to any evidence that he was interested men at all, just that his wives were more like friends than like wives.

Everyting I've heard about him reminds me of myself. If I lived in his time, I would probably have married a friend of the opposite gender just because it wasn't really an option not to.

Fandom wank can really cheapen queer issues sometimes. Comphet isn't when someone writes a sex scene involving a bi fictional characters of opposite genders. It's when you *have* to marry someone of the opposite gender to get your family to stop tittering about it (and obviously that didn't work, since I heard about it over a century later).

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willalove75 · 7 months

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stop simping over women and pay attention to your husband. You clearly made your choice to be with a man and have his child rather than choose a woman. You bisexual women don’t get to exist in lesbian spaces when you lean towards men. Unless your husband lets to you step out on your marriage or lets you have delusional thoughts that any lesbian would want a woman knocked up by a man. You bisexual women who lean more towards men or are with men have no right to be in sapphic or lesbian spaces. And lady d is a lesbian so as if she would be with someone who let a man touch them let alone knock them up.

Oh, I'm sorry, did my husband tell you that I'm not giving him enough attention? Didn't think so.

Yes, I made a choice to be with him, because I fell in love with him. Because he's my best friend and my biggest supporter in everything I do (yes, he even supports my writing and fics and he tells me often how proud he is of me). I did not chose him because he's a man. Truthfully, his gender had absolutely nothing to do with why I married him. I just happened to fall in love with and marry a man, but that does NOT make me any less of a bisexual woman.

"You bisexual women..." and people question whether or not bi-erasure is a thing, meanwhile, this entire ask is such a great example of just that😒

"delusional thoughts that any lesbian would want a woman knocked up by a man." is truly offensive to not only every bi woman who has been with a man, but any woman who has. What about the lesbians that got pregnant by men?? Because this may come as a shock to you, but it does happen. It may not happen a lot or often, but it does. Does that mean that those women are "tainted" or "ruined" also??? No it fucking doesn't, you idiot.

It really makes me laugh when people try and use a fictional character to make a real life argument. You want to know why? BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT FUCKING REAL!!! So honestly, you have absolutely no idea if that's true or not because she's a fake fucking character from a video game. Are you also this upset at the fic writers who make her trans??? Or what about fic writers that make Alcina's partner trans??? Or are you just that much of biphobic person and this is the hill you're choosing to die on?? Either way, you're an actual bigot.

This post just SCREAMS biphobia and bi-erasure and it's fucking gross. You are so very obviously projecting your own issues and insecurities in this and honestly I would be embarrassed if I were you. Because not a single thing you said is true AT ALL or holds any merit.

Bisexual women who lean towards men or who are with men ABSOLUTELY do belong in those spaces. Just because a bisexual woman is married/with a man or leans towards men does not discredit or change their sexuality. No bi person automatically becomes straight if they date/marry the opposite gender or become gay/lesbian if they date/marry the same gender. It's called BIsexual. More than one gender. You do not get to invalidate every bi person with this shitty (and inherently wrong) opinion.

I know you wrote this trying to get a rise out of me, and congratulations because you succeeded. But I also know that people like you leave messages like this because they feel so broken and hurt and shitty that they want others to feel like that too. Unfortunately for you, I grew up in the era that birthed anonymous hate messages so you'll have to try harder next time. Not only that, but I am proud and confident in who I am and no pathetic anonymous (especially anonymous, you pussy) message is going to shake me.

I am a proud bisexual woman. I am proud to be married to my husband. I am proud that I will soon be the mother of a little boy who I will raise to be a much better person than you'll ever be. I am proud of what I've written and no, I will not stop.

#willalove75 #lady dimitrescu #alcina dimitrescu #bi erasure is real #tw #biphobia #bi erasure #fuck outta here with these shitty and wrong opinions #you picked the wrong bitch my guy

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lordsukunas · 7 months

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tldr: suguru as a child/early teenager and his journey as a sorcerer after he meets you, his new neighbor.

cw: mentions of vomiting, not in-depth. not edited, not beta-read, rushed, and possibly ooc suguru. gender neutral and sorcerer!reader.

a/n: sigh... i’m so tired. probably when i wake up i’ll actually edit it, but i just needed to get something out, so maybe consider this a lil teaser...? i might make a second part expanding on how he ends up going to jjt n then whenever he defects, but im absolutely exhausted rn. exams have been kicking my ass </3 + im going to a festival so this might not be edited for a lil while longer. sorry yall!

a part of me thinks suguru would live in some small, unknown little town. the people are closed-minded, content with the life they’ve built for themselves, and they don’t want it to change. if you’re born there, it’s hard to get out, especially with such few opportunities. it’s a town meant to keep aspiring little doves caged within its walls.

so imagine some six, maybe seven year-old boy going around saying he sees monsters sometimes. of course, the first conclusion any adult would reach is that the poor thing is having nightmares. he’ll grow out of it — all of them do.

but suguru doesn’t.

he’s afraid to sleep at night, and despite his parents’ pleas for him to sleep in their bed, he says that he can’t. “what if you get hurt too?”

they end up having to sneak melatonin in his dinner to get him to sleep at night.

when he turns eleven, he gets a grasp on his technique. he has to eat the monsters, consume them so that they don’t go out and hurt anyone else. that’s easy enough, right?

for the first few weeks, he vomits. they taste disgusting, like dried, crusty rags used to clean up puke and shit. but he has to do it, he has to! otherwise, who’s going to keep his innocent parents safe?

so he keeps going. exorcise, consume, puke. exorcise, consume, puke. exorcise, consume, puke.

exorcise and consume.

then, at age twelve, you come along.

you’re like the sun peeking through the dark clouds after days full of rain and thunder. a breath of fresh air, a sugary treat to balance out the saltiness of this shitty town.

you move into the once abandoned house right beside his, a radiant smile on your face and eyes twinkling with determination.

beautiful, perfect, normal.

the two of you click almost instantly, although suguru’s a little reluctant at first — what if you think he’s weird? his parents and teachers say he’s a bit troubled, nosy neighbors joke that he’s a few sandwiches short of a picnic, and bored grandmas claim he’s been touched by the devil. despite their rumors, despite suguru’s reputation, despite the fact you two are polar opposites, you don’t avoid him. in fact, it’s like those things just entice you even more.

“suguru.”

the fear in your voice catches him off-guard, and he stops walking. your hand grips the hem of his jacket, and your finger slowly raises to point towards the corner.

“what is that?”

it’s a crude thing. skin a dingy shade of purple, stubby limbs twisted and contorted into impossible angles, and jagged yellow teeth that poke past its thin, cracked lips.

that’s when he realizes it: you can see them too.

he’s not alone. finally, fucking finally, suguru geto is not alone.

by thirteen, you and suguru are attached at the hip. there’s not a day where the two of you don’t see each other, even when you get grounded for accidentally breaking a bathroom stall trying to exorcise a curse.

they’re so ungrateful.

he’s tainted your image. you were once normal, the cute neighbor nextdoor, but now you’re best friends with suguru, the pretty boy with the strange bangs and broken mind.

you don’t care though, and he loves that you never have.

nothing can separate you. you go to school together, take the same classes (thanks to suguru modifying his schedule), walk home together, exorcise curses together.

you’re all he needs, and he’s all you need. you’re the only ones who understand each other on a fundamental level, who know each other inside and out, down to the very last atom in your bodies.

with you, he’s sure that he can snap the chain and leave this place, to soar so high in the sky that there’s nothing and no one left but you and him.

you hand suguru his slushie, and he takes a long sip, letting the sugar-filled drink wash away the lingering taste of today’s curse.

“sometimes, i think we’re kinda like batman and superman.”

suguru can’t help but scoff. “us? you think we’re superheroes?” how unsurprisingly childish of you.

you nod, snapping your kit-kat bar in half and taking a bite out of it. “yeah, dude! we fight alien bad guys with our superpowers. pretty cool, right?”

he leans back, legs spread and an arm resting on the back of the bench. “sure, but they always get rewarded for saving the day. what do we get?” he doesn’t wait for your answer. “nothing.”

a small frown flits across your typically cheerful features, and suguru wishes he could shove his words back into his mouth and down his throat.

“mm... i think we get stuff. we get to see our parents safe, and even if no one else here really likes us, they’re safe thanks to us, too.” the toe of your shoe traces shapes into the pavement. “we’re the only ones that can do this, suguru. it’s our duty.”

right. duty.

suguru hums, but you can’t tell whether it’s in agreement or not. you decide that it doesn’t matter, that he’s just thinking like always.

“wish i was rich, though," you joke and pop the rest of your little kit-kat stick into your mouth.

after a moment, he shakes his head and takes a sip of his bright purple drink. “me too.”

#jjk #jjk geto #jjk x reader #jjk imagines #geto suguru #suguru geto #geto suguru x reader #geto suguru x you #suguru geto x reader #suguru geto x you #🪵 – writing

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bitbugbites-re · 1 year

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𝙼𝚒𝚗𝚎 | 𝔩𝔢𝔬𝔫 𝔨𝔢𝔫𝔫𝔢𝔡𝔶 𝔵 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯

Your husband, Leon, seems to love being a new father. He also seems to love the new territories that come along with it -- such as trying the milk you produce.

a03 link

word count: ~2.1k

gender: fem! reader

cw: NSFW, FLUFF // dilf! leon, married life, lactation kink, cunnilingus, vaginal sex, you and leon have a baby // ktober

a/n: "hey have u started studying for the midterms?" no but I did write a lactation kink fic. thanks for asking!

p.s. -- no black bar this time because it picks up like. literally right away

“C’mon,” he purred, his stubble rubbing up against your naked thigh as he stared up at you, grinning. “Just a little taste?”

You stared at your husband with a raised brow and a small smirk, amused by his suggestion. He wanted to try some of your breast milk, and you weren’t quite sure how you felt about that.

It hadn’t been long since you had given birth to your and his child, a healthy baby boy, who resembled Leon a lot more than he’d care to admit. The two of you were pretty happy with the birth of your son, elated that you were able to start a family together – and while all the early morning screams and consistent diaper changes were tough, neither of you regretted a thing. Especially Leon.

In fact, for some reason, he seemed to be newly invigorated in more ways than one. Not only was he eager to spend time with your child, but he was also becoming more proactive with household duties as well. Not that he hadn’t done it before – he’d take out the trash, clean up after himself, and cook when you asked him to, but now, he was more aggressive about it. You spent the entire day cleaning? Go ahead and kick your feet up on the couch, Leon’s got dinner handled; Your back hurts from sleeping wrong? Don’t worry about watching the baby, Leon took the day off; You have an unexplainable craving for pumpkin pie? Leon’s already on his way to the grocery store. You weren’t sure why this sudden change came about, but you weren’t complaining either. You’d heard a lot of stories from friends whose husbands became totally unhelpful after the birth of their kid, so you were glad that the same thing didn’t happen with Leon.

Although, no matter how grateful you were that he wasn’t a deadbeat, you still weren’t sure why he was suddenly so enthusiastic to help out. You figured that, psychologically speaking, there had to be a reason for it. You just weren’t sure what it was – although, you did figure that it probably had something to do with him wanting to have a family of his own, considering how he lost his at a young age. Either way, it didn’t matter – you were just glad he was being both a good husband and a good father.

“Why? It’s technically baby food. It’s not sweetened or processed – it might not taste good.” you softly chuckled, watching as he spread one of your legs before pushing his head against it. He then began kissing the inside of your thigh, making eye contact as he did so. You petted his head, running your fingers through his hair in response.

“I don’t care,” he mumbled, his voice laced with lust. Leon then placed the hand opposite of the one he used to spread your leg onto your calf, cupping it, before running it up and over to your knee. It then traveled over your thigh, caressing it back and forth as Leon’s kisses started to grow closer and closer to your core. Suddenly, you felt him flatten his tongue against the inner fat of your leg, licking a small stripe up it. “I’ll trade ‘ya.”

You giggled, your face growing hot. “Trade me what? You gonna lick up my whole leg, or something?”

“No,” he spoke, his voice deep. “I’m gonna lick something else.”

You shut your mouth after that, losing the words to speak. Well, you thought, it’s good to know that even after having a baby with him, the passion in the bedroom won’t be dying down any time soon.

He kissed, licked, and sucked all the way until his nose and mouth were centered at your clit. His hands now rested at your kneecaps, and he looked up at you before speaking. “It’s a deal?”

You blushed, biting the inside of your cheek, narrowing your brows at him, thinking before speaking. “...Yes. It’s a deal.”

He said nothing in reply, clearly very serious about what he was doing, as usually he would crack a corny one-liner. But he didn’t.

He moved his hands slowly from your knees to your hips, dipping his thumbs under the lining of your panties before withdrawing them from your body. He slid them all the way down your legs before placing one hand under your heel, lifting it, and helping you step out of the underwear as you continued to sit on the bed.

Once they were fully off, he tossed your panties across the room, watching them as they flung. Somehow, they landed on an adhesive wall clip that you had been planning to use for a hanging potted plant, and you eyed Leon as he raised a brow, seemingly impressed with himself for unintentionally getting the article to dangle from an object. You swore you heard him whisper out a small “nice” as he pecked his way back up your leg and to your crotch, although you weren’t 100% sure.

Finally, he began to do what you were waiting for. He kissed the area above your clit where your folds start, teasing you, knowing that it would be sensitive for you, but not quite as sensitive as if he placed his lips on your sweet spot. Leon then ran his warm hands up your slightly cold body, and before you knew it, he was pulling you by the hips, into his face.

You felt his tongue lick at you in a multitude of different directions, and at one point, you swore he was spelling something. You wanted to ask, your guess being that it was the word “mine,” but your mind was so focused on the wet, warm, tingling feeling down below, that you missed the opportunity while trying to stifle the moans growing in your throat.

Leon continued to lap at you, dipping the wet muscle in and out of your hole occasionally while also alternating between sucking at your clit. He knew exactly what he was doing, and after a while, you started to get close to reaching your orgasm.

You huffed repeatedly, desperate for air as you hooked a leg around his wide back, pulling him closer into you. As you did, his nose drove right up into your sensitive spot, which resulted in him mumbling something into you, his breath brushing up inside your private area.

God, you thought, I don’t know if I can hold on for much longer.

He worked with his tongue for a little while longer before you began to cum, gripping him by the shoulder of his shirt. You were practically heaving him into you, although he didn’t seem to mind. You felt the heat at your clit take over, an electric shock of a climax rising over you as you rode his face, grinding your hips up against him as you panted.

Once you finally calmed down, catching your breath, you felt him pull back, the cold air washing over your core. It was a stark contrast as compared to when Leon’s head was hitched between your legs.

You watched as your husband began to stand, towering over you, wiping his mouth with his forearm. He then picked you up by your sides, where your ribs are, lightly bouncing you further back onto the bed before crawling over you. Leon placed his head between your neck and your shoulder, his hair tickling you slightly. “So. Ready to hold up your end of the bargain?”

“Fine,” you rolled your eyes, smiling. You lightly pushed him back by his shoulder, so that he now sat with your knees in between his spread ones. Pulling your shirt over your head, you revealed your chest, looking down at it, noticing that your bra was lightly stained with a splotch of leaking breast milk. “Oh, perfect,” you said sarcastically. Leon only grinned, not seeming to mind the now-dirty undergarment.

It didn’t take long for him to begin unclasping your bra, which he had gotten pretty good at during your time together as a couple. He could now do it with one hand, which unsurprisingly enough, seemed to impress him more than you.

Once the top undergarment was off, he hovered himself over you, placing one hand on your waist to pull you into him as he hung his head low and took your nipple into his mouth. His other hand rested on your opposite breast, cupping it as he squeezed and played with it softly. You gasped at the sensation, and soon enough, you felt him begin to suck at your nipple, the warm liquid seeping out semi-steadily. As soon as he had enough of your milk in his mouth in order to have tasted it properly, a hum escaped his lips. He seemed to like it.

After a couple more minutes of this, he delicately laid you down flatly on the bed and began unbuttoning his pants, his manhood bulging through his black briefs as he revealed them. You then watched as he pulled back, some of your breast milk spilling out of the corner of his mouth as he tugged his shirt over his head. His toned chest was on full display now, and you swore to yourself that you fell in love with him all over again.

Leon leaned back down into you, kicking his pants and underwear off, his cock springing up and hitting against his belly button. You were glad you had a husband who was as big as he was because otherwise, you wouldn’t be able to be in awe every time he pulled himself out of the clothes that restrained him.

You placed your hands on the mountains and curves of his firm shoulders, squeezing them lightly as his lips returned to one of your breasts. A couple of seconds later, Leon removed his mouth with a pop! and spread your legs, placing himself between them. He then took hold of his thick and slightly irritated-looking member, lining it up at your hole. You watched him with eyes full of desperation, your breath hitching as he finally pushed himself in. He groaned at the feeling of himself inside of you before leaning down over you, pressing his chest into yours. Breast milk continued to leak out of your nipples, innocently, and you were sure you felt some rub off onto Leon as his body consumed yours.

You then hiked your legs around his hips, feeling him grind into you the way he knows you like. Leon seemed satisfied with your action, smirking and chuckling through broken breaths as he looked into your eyes while pumping his cock in and out of your core. You grinned back, soft haa’s and hmm’s escaping your lips as you did so.

Eventually, Leon began to speed up his pace, rocking his hips into you with a desperation that only turned you on even more than you already were. The sounds of the bed creaking wildly filled the room, along with the sounds of his skin smacking against yours. You knew for sure, that the two of you wouldn’t be able to last much longer.

Leon’s head drooped down next to your neck, and he shakily whispered into your ear with that deep voice of his, “I’m gonna cum. I’m gonna cum.”

The desirous tone of his voice sent shockwaves through your body, you shivering a little at the velvety nature of his words and panting breaths. You then yelped out a moan as he suddenly thrust up into your G-spot, likely accidentally, and you could feel yourself begin to unravel then and there. You clutched onto him with all your might, smacking his shoulder to let him know you were cumming, shutting your eyes as you began to feel pleasure overtake all your sensitive regions; your clit, your core, your nipples.

Leon lost himself in you shortly after, his cock rutting up into you in an unstable, unpatterned manner. You felt his seed pour into you in warm spurts, still lightly lurching his waist into you as he rode out his high. You listened as his throaty groans and deep whines spilled from his mouth, trying to catch your breath as you did so. Soon enough, both of you had came and were desperately trying to get enough air in your lungs to breathe normally.

Leon pulled out of you, throwing himself down next to you, taking your hand in his. You turned to look at him, watching as his chest rose and fell with heavy inhales and exhales. A couple of seconds later, he felt your stare and turned his head to look at you, grinning.

“Did you feel me spell something earlier, when I was going down on ‘ya?” he asked, rubbing his thumb in circles on your hand. You simply nodded in response, too exhausted to speak.

“It was ‘mine.’ I spelled ‘mine.’”

For the official and original Kinktober 23 prompts, check here. Credits to @kinktober2023 for the ideas!

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pillow-anime-talk · 5 months

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HIII I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL

may i please request prompt 49 and 51 for William James Moriarty from mtp?

Like the reader is as smart as william and helps him with his plans and stuff and they both fall for each other but can't be together?

Thank you, have a great day!!

# tags: scenario; kinda lovers/enemies; unrequited love; light romance; mostly drama; also angst; reader as police inspector; mention of murder and blood; nsfw

includes: gender neutral reader ft. william james moriarty {mtp}

author’s note: long time no see. sorry for that but thank you sm for your request; due to the rules i only chose the one number you asked for :) i hope you like it, love u all

49. “I told you this is how it ends.”

You looked with visible regret at the figure sitting across from you, on an uncomfortable chair in a cramped room lit by dim white light. Next to you stood your friend and co-worker, who is a five years older than you, and opposite your person, with a calm expression on his face, sat William, who just a few days ago was drinking tea with lemon with you, and today he was accused of murder. And with particular cruelty.

The young man, however, didn’t reveal anything; no sadness, no bitterness, his eyes showed no positive or negative emotion. Just plain emptiness, interspersed with the flash of a lamp above the three of you.

“What made you kill Sandy Moriarty, née Lonewood?” Asked a young policeman, also a profiler by profession. “She was your sister-in-law after all.” Your eyelid twitched with slight sadness. Sandy was Louis’ partner; they had been together for over two years. You even had the opportunity to meet her – she had foxy hair and calm eyes, and she was a talented painter. “Moriarty answer to me.” The uniformed man’s voice was low and firm. Unlike your expression: soft, full of despair.

“… Well. I had my own reasons, sir.”

“What reasons?”

“It’s all my business, sir.” Your co-worker just sighed, looking at the accused with a disbelieving expression. His nose wrinkled and the whiskers beneath it twitched slightly.

“Y/N, I’ll be right back. I’ll go get some papers and things. Keep an eye on him.” You only nodded at his words, never taking William out of your sight. His long blond hair fell unruly over his forehead and his chest slowly moved back and forth.

As soon as Alois left the small room, devoid of furniture and color, your hands trembled slightly and your eyes turned to the right wall.

“Who are you protecting, William? Tell me.”

“… For your safety, let it go. It’s not a matter of solving the mystery of who stole the little child’s candy and why. Just accept it all that it just had to be like that and let it go.”

“Why?” You repeated in a slightly more confident voice, and your eyes met the ruby ones.

“I told you this is how it ends.” He whispered. “I’m not from your world, Y/N. And I never will be. You wanted to protect me, I appreciate that, but it won’t always go your way. We’re too different.” He added, and after a while the door to the room let in a bit more cold and light. Your work partner stopped next to you again and threw a few photos and descriptions from the scene on the gray table, pursing his lips at the same time.

The photographs showed the silhouette of a woman in a beautiful yellow dress, with a large smear of scarlet blood and several bullets around her.

Whatever your intentions were, you certainly wouldn’t be able to help William anymore, who in your eyes at that moment was just a murderer hiding behind a mask of a calm smile and pale skin. Although your heart was obviously burning like a hot coal, you couldn’t do anything more than look at the photos and move one of them closer to the blonde male.

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emaistome · 9 days

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Alicent and her "liberation"

I wholeheartedly believe that to tell a feminist story, you have to at least tell a story that make sense, this is unfortunately not what Ryan Condal and his team did with Alicent Hightower, in season two of HOTD.

I kept defending them and their choices, until that last scene of season two, and although it breaks my heart that Alicent “sacrificed” Aegon, I have to admit that the things she said around it bother me a bit more.

Before anything, I want to point out that the patriarchy is not some fable, some story that they tell women to make them be submissive; it’s a setting that affects the lives of every living woman in the world (both the real world and asoif). It restricts the freedom of women, and put their very lives at stakes all the time. It manifests itself everywhere, so much that it’s easy to make people believe that “It’s just the order of things”. Sure, women can try to fight against these rules, like Rhaenyra (to a certain extent) who did not care about the prejudice against women and their sexuality, and vied for the throne despite having bastards. Or like Rhaenys, Visenya and Alyssane who despite all of their faults, did try to make the lives of women in the seven kingdoms better.

Alicent did believe that men were more fit to rule, while she thought that women were supposed to “guide them gently”. Although she believed that Rhaenyra should sit the Iron Throne, and she also tried to be named regent, so it’s inconsistent, but I digress. However, I don’t blame her for that. Alicent did not make these rules; these rules existed long before she was born, and that’s what she has been taught since she was a child. Alicent suffered a lot from them. In fact all her life, all she did was trying to make a better life for herself and her children under these rules. For the entire season one, Alicent was shown as the person who suffered more from gendered oppression in the show. Her reasoning for taking the throne was valid her actions were understandable and motivated by self preservation. If they Rhaenyra took it, she would need to kill all of Alicent’s children.

Somehow, season two episode height, had her apologizing for all the actions she made out of self-preservation. And you can smell that some 21st century writer was the mind behind her reasoning, but I’ll say more on that later.

Multiple people in charge of the show, talked about Alicent needing to be humbled. Why does she need to be humbled and apologize for her sins? While a man like Viserys, who cut his wife to take a child out of her and raped Alicent is glorified. They had her recite all the misogynistic criticism the general audience had against her, and apologize for it.

Alicent tried to be the perfect friend for Rhaenyra, more than she should have. For some reason people still find ways to blame her. She was groomed since she was 14 by Viserys and Otto; she is blamed for that, as if she had any agency in the situation.

Alicent should betray her family, disobey her father to protect Rhaenyra, do the opposite of what she was told since she was a child. And it would still not mean anything because neither her, nor Rhaenyra have power in the situation.

She was raped by Viserys as a 15/16 years old girl, again it must be her fault as a 15 years old girl, and she manipulated poor old Viserys who had no idea that he was grooming a young girl. And they always use the argument that it was fine at the time. The discourse around it resembles the discourse around Lolita when it was first published more than 50 years ago, and people still haven’t moved from blaming young girls for the actions of the men around them.

If they have a little bit of conscience, they will tell you that they feel bad for Alicent when she was a child, but not for the adult she became. But the adult is the direct result of the abuse that she suffered when she was a child. And again she fears that her children could be killed, a valid fear. Why would I blame her for doing what she could to save her family? Apparently Ryan Condal and Sara Heiss, think that she should apologize for that. “I lost my way; or rather it was taken away from me.” Implies that she realizes that getting married and having babies was never what she wanted, but something that was forced on her. But in the same scene (just like in the entire season), she praises Viserys even thought he was the main person who took her agency away from her. And I understand that victims can cope by idealizing their abusers, but viserys did not abuse only her, he abused her and her children, and clearly didn’t value her sacrifices. I think it came to that point where she didn’t even need a “liberation arc” to realize that, yet she still praises him.

Let’s talk about her plans to run away. This is where the writing started to feel the most like a 21st century pseudo-feminist was in charge of this writing and was more attached to the idea of Alicent being free, instead of real freedom. Alicent planned to runaway with her daughter and her granddaughter to “breathe the open air, and finally be free”, but she doesn’t plan any money? It’s as if they were trying to make her sound dumb because Aegon and Larys were also planning to runaway but somehow they knew they had money somewhere. But Alicent? Nothing. I’m actually not nitpicking. The patriarchy actively refuses to grant women power or money, so that they could stay bound to the men around them, to their family. And she doesn’t have any skill to survive when she “wanders in the wilderness” she was raised a highborn lady in a castle life in the wilderness, without any family to protect her would kill her and her autistic daughter and granddaughter. Women usually stay in abusive environments not only because they were brainwashed, but also because they feared that the world outside might be less kinder to them. It takes a minimum of logic to understand that the patriarchy can’t be kinder to a lowborn unknown woman than Alicent who sat in the royal small council, where only her and Rhaenyra sat as women in the seven kingdoms. She is still top two, of the most privileged women in Westeros, running away would not make her situation better.

We have a a history of women actually running away from Westeros and not being free from the patriarchy. Saerra was sold to a brothel, Jorah’s wife was some man’s concubine and Daenerys, had all her money being stolen and was sold as a child bride to Khal Drogo.

There is not a single way to make that scene work, it’s not feminist, as it realizes nothing but making one of the most intelligent characters appear very dumb. And I’d rather have Alicent be misogynistic and intelligent than having her be liberated and dumb. Women in real life can be misogynistic and perpetuate the system that made them suffer because that the only way they can survive. But also how can I blame her for her own oppression, how can I ask her to apologize for her actions as a victim.

#alicent hightower #house targaryen #house of the dragon #feminism #alicent don't need to apologize #Ryan Condal #team alicent #team green #hotd alicent #hotd

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uramitashi · 1 month

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radfem got an hate i never fully understood, as an outsider. i was pretty much a libfem following the stream, so i just justified it with "oh, they are probably hostile towards trans people". still i was weirded out by the comparison to nazis, the kill threats and the desire to assault them.

i got into radical feminism for two reasons:

• the whole concept of women oppression was understimated in any other social group. growing up i independently realized that sexism and misogyny were pervasive AND the root of all human misery in a way or another. they shaped wars, greed, and ALL kind of crimes in a way or another. it weirded me out that no one mentioned it ever, nor did anyone notice how fucked up gender roles were; in fact, i was disappointed in liberal feminism for starting to justify them and even encourage them. women and girls around me were becoming more hyperfeminine than ever, with all the anxiety this kind of focus meant. i wanted to rip out my gender from my body and exist outside of it. a libfem friend of mine asked me "maybe you're non binary?"

i was disenchanted.

• the whole male sexuality expression was fucked up. first I thought I was angry at porn, but surprisingly I wasn't. the problem felt deeper. after some reasoning I realized - men felt sexually entitled and compulsively stimulated by women's body. It wasn't about porn per se. it was about the fact that a photo of me in a bikini could become a screenshot men could sexualise and masturbate to - something that wasn't porn but could be sexualised anyway. female sexual objectification, the hypersexualisation of women's body made me angry in a visceral, primitive way.

non-feminists could not even grasp the topic. liberal feminists were very supportive of the topic, considering it a sexually progressive stance and indirectly calling me a "conservative prude" (i am anti religion and very leftist and those friends knew). that made me angrier! because how can you suggest sex work is an ok thing to do, if it's not equal among the genders? why do women not buy sex? why don't men beautify themselves to be bought? all those questions could have been answered with gender essentialism and the reinforcement of toxic gender roles, so i never tried to argue with them again. It felt pointless; liberal feminism became empty in my eyes.

i noticed something, while becoming a radfem. i noticed it in the news, in my real life circles, while studying surveys and browsing socials - people despised radfems more than they despised nazis, or communists, or each other. it dawned on me that radical feminisms was in fact just Feminism with the capital F, like normal textbook Feminism, and that everything else (liberal feminism, proletariat feminism etc.) was its sibling or child. but radical feminism, from a historical point of view, was just the core ideals of feminism. and I realized people hate it so much even today because its opposition to the status quo rises uncomfortable questions, which in this day and age are too much of a taboo to even elaborate them properly. to put it bluntly, people hate radical feminism because misogyny is blatant, pervasive and unquestioned. women are properties - whether private or public. No one discusses it. men are entitled to sex - what, you want to ban porn? Christian prude bitch. oh you don't want an hourglass figure and an obsession with beauty that you need to constantly validate with male attention? then you are invisible in society.

Choice feminism is only popular because it allows women to choose the patriarchal option, therefore not representing a problem for the status quo. that's what it all boils to: women can choose to be whatever they want, as long as they are fuckable.

but those people aren't your friends. the male friends who call (all) feminists "annoying bitches who need to be fucked so hard they forget how to whine" don't see you as human. the girls in your class who strictly adhere to hyperfemininity are only going to be seen as fleshlights and trophies for men to collect and trashtalk about with other males - they gain no power from their gender role. The people who defend sex workers' existence don't give a fuck about those women as human beings but just as spank banks. In fact they hate them with every fiber of their being, and they can't even justify the reason.

all this to say that no political current has bought me so much sense of community and intellectual enrichment as radical feminism. realizing how unfairly hated it is, made it much clear to me why i need it.

it is a cruel world.

#radfem #radical feminist community #Radical feminism #radblr #radical feminist safe #radical feminists do interact

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postmodernmulticoloredcloak · 1 year

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Light spoilers for the Barbie movie, but mostly a reflection about myself and gender. (You also don’t need to have watched the movie to read this.)

Something that really resonated with me was the part of the movie where it was said that in the context of the gender roles of our patriarchal society, in order to be attractive to men, women act like they are more vulnerable, less intelligent, and generally helpless, insecure and in need of men’s assistance. The Barbies eventually weaponize this, but it is still a statement about something that projected me back in my high school years.

Back then I had no idea I was queer or anything (it was the mid 00s, we were fed a steady diet of Bush era conservatorism, islamophobia and fascistoid ideas on the corruption of the west and whatnot - the future queer-friendly climate was baaaarely a germinating seed thanks to cultural milestones like Brokeback Mountain, but damn it was a different world, really) but I was perfectly, acutely aware that I did not perform femininity in the way the girls around me did.

I had no knowledge of the concept of performing femininity or anything of that sort, but I remember being very perceptive about the difference in which I related to the “opposite sex” and in which my female friends did (not all of them, of course, but in retrospect they likely were not all heterosexual).

I knew that I couldn’t act like them even if tried, but also that I wasn’t actually interested in trying. Part of me was saddened by it, kind of regretted it, because I believed that I would never be attractive to boys unless I acted like the other girls. (Turns out I didn’t actually care, but back then I just assumed it was something that one just cared about, and blamed my “shyness” for my unwillingness to try going out with boys. Turns out that if someone wants to bang guys, they go and do it. Wild, right?)

But another part of me just couldn’t... summon the willingness to try. I didn’t want to act like I was insecure of my own intelligence and abilities compared to boys’. I didn’t want to act like I didn’t know my own value. I didn’t want to act like I thought I was stupid, and that I needed (wanted) a boy’s support and assistance.

I saw boys as competition, not as objects of desire, not as something to attract. I wanted to show that I was just as smart as the smartest boys. Heck, I wanted to show I was smarter. Later I learnt I was trans and asexual, which explains why I saw myself as a peer to the boys, not as a potential girlfriend for them.

(The biggest regret I have about my adolescence was that I didn’t realize that I should have tried to hang out with the boys more than the girls, but back then we self-segregated based on sex a lot, kind of crazy to think about now.)

This post doesn’t really have a moral, except maybe that it’s so incredibly fundamental for kids to know about the facets of gender and sexuality. I was smart, I understood things that I was not given the tools to conceptualize but I still managed to understand some of them, but I still lacked fundamental tools to understand the whole picture.

But also that gender non conformity just... happens. I didn’t have the conceptual tools to understand any of it, but I was gender non conforming and I fundamentally knew it, even if I didn’t have the words for it. You don’t catch gender non conformity from the outside; you have it, and from the outside you learn to understand what it means and how to navigate the world the way you are.

I’ve felt suddenly very close to my teenage self thanks to that scene in Barbie. She was a girl, she didn’t have the tools to be anything but that. But she was a girl in a way that didn’t conform to what being a girl was supposed to be according to the gender roles of the world she was in.

As a child, I was absolutely a girl. I played with Barbies with other girls. I wore dresses and skirts and read books with girl protagonists and watched movies and shows with girl protagonists. You can see the clues of my future gender and sexuality in my childhood, but only if you know what you’re looking for. I was indeed a girl. But I didn’t grow into a woman, I grew into something else, and teenage me - the age when you are in between childhood and adulthood, the age I was supposed to go from girl to woman but didn’t - was in between those. Still a girl, but without the germs of womanhood.

I wore a pink Barbie shirt to the movie theater (literally a Barbie shirt, with a print of several Barbie dolls on it). It felt like a homage to girl me. It was also campy enough to feel right for my current me, of course. But mostly it felt like something that had to do with my past girl self. The entire movie felt like something that had to do with my past girl self and how that intersect with current me. I’m not a woman, but I was a girl, and the movie said something about my past girl self, but also to current me, the one who knows they’re asexual and trans. It’s hard to put into words, but the fact that the movie said something about non-conformity to stereotypical gender roles and to heteronormativity (including allonormativity) through the lense of girlhood femininity... it felt like something that wrapped together past me and current me.

We’re not two different mes. It’s still me. We are one person. I am one person. I am that girl and this transmasculine person. I am me. (And I am Kenough. We are all Kenough even without what society says we must have to be complete.)

#blabbering me #barbie #gender #actually trans #transmasc #actually asexual #asexuality #queer things

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yellowocaballero · 1 year

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SHAZAM SHAZAM SHAZAM pls tell us about billy batson. ive only ever seen the movies o great comic knower

Very very very VERY far from comic expert (that's brawltogethernow) but I have read a lot of Shazam. His history is actually really, really fascinating and involves more than one lawsuit that really defined very early comics. I'll focus on one thing, though.

There are two Captain Marvels: One from the 1940s to around 2013, and one from 2013 til now. The Captain Marvel you're familiar with (who is named Shazam) is from 2013. He's a more realistic, grounded character. He was created to be pretty much the polar opposite of his original version. The best summary is to say that the Wizard chose Billy Batman 1940 because he had the purest heart, and the Wizard chose Billy Batson ~2013 because he was there. My personal 'best' Shazam story is the "Shazam: The Monster Society of Evil" graphic novel by the guy who made Bone. It's good because it's for elementary schoolers yet acknowledges this small child as homeless. Which, don't get me wrong, you shouldn't always do. My personal favorite is the 1970s ones.

As some background: Otto Binder was the creator/main writer of the very early Captain Marvel comics. He was by far and away the best writer of the early Superman Silver Age comics, because all of his comics were batshit insane. Shazam has a complicated and legal history with Superman, so the 1970 run was a super fun high camp tongue in cheek reinvention of the best Silver Age stories.

So the 1970 Captain Marvel comics are insane.

I can't even summarize them without sounding crazy. Basically the conceit is that Captain Marvel, Captain Marvel Jr, and Mary Marvel (Billy, Freddy, and Mary) are having 1940s Golden Age Adventures when they get somehow in suspended animation and are basically time travelled to the 1970s. This don't bother them too much. Why would it bother them. Nothing bothers these people. Nothing. I don't think anybody experiences a negative emotion in these comics. Not bc they were twee. Bc they were insane.

Many of the comics basically had three shorter comics inside it: one Billy story, one Mary story, one Freddy story. Interestingly, they all had different art styles, artists, types of story, genre, etc. Billy's stories had a cartoony art style with very over-the-top and silly plotlines that involved supervillain bad dudes. Freddy's art was slightly more realistic and was slighty more grounded, but still had some classic Marvel indescribable scifi that can best be summarized as that one meme panel people have seen where Sivana recites a science equation that lets him walk through walls. Mary's stories were much more realistically drawn and featured the most banal shit, like her starting a club with her friends. Somehow Mary Marvel gets involved in those.

Sometimes they worked together and did superhero things and fought bad guys. The average fight looked like this:

Billy was a twelve year old who lived by himself, in his own apartment, had his own radio show, a full-ass job, a whole thing as Captain Marvel. He paid fucking taxes. Everybody knew this and nobody cared. He's the most affable, good natured kid on the face of the planet. Nothing bothers him. Nothing. Nothing bothers any of these people. Sivana shows up and he's BIG MAD so he's creating another death ray and Captain Marvel shows up like "Oh you rascal! Time to punch this and go back to helping my friend eat his infinite Jello."

He has a friend named Talky Tawny, who is a talking tiger wearing a suit. He also has a friend named Sunny Smiles, a person of indeterminate gender who everybody falls in love with, for unexplained and unknown reasons. Not to be confused with Freddy's friend Gregory Gosharootie, the "World's Dullest Mortal", who is so boring that nobody notices him and he keeps accidentally comitting crime. There is also an old guy named Uncle Marvel who pretends he has superpowers, which they all find funny so they just roll with it. Freddy is a disabled orphan who has to sell papers on the street corner to make a living. Mary lives in a middle class suburban home with loving foster parents. It never once seems to occur to Mary's parents to adopt Billy, for Freddy to live with Billy. Everybody is happiest this way.

I do think this is partly why a good Shazam comic has to be aimed at the 6-12yo demographics. They have to be for small children, because Billy is living a complete and utter power fantasy that only a ten year old would think is a good idea. He's a kid, and he doesn't have drag parents or a lame family, but he can turn into Superman, and he can also do magic, and everybody loves him and thinks he's the nicest person, and his supervillains are Dr. Doofenschmirtz and a worm, and his supporting cast is like okay my sister if she HAS to be involved, but also my best friend who is a paperboy! but cool because he's disabled, and….

Look, you could engage with that seriously. You could go "holy shit this is a homeless child". That's fine. That's what they do these days, and that's what they did in the movies. Nothing wrong with that. Take the story more seriously.

But also they don't give a worm the electric chair in those stories, so.

To actually give some commentary on these comics: these comics really love people. I've never seen comics that were so entrenched in their community. The kids just know everybody they meet on the street. Freddy delivers paper up and down every block, so an average story for him is just talking to a butcher or baker or old man or grumpy housewife and helping them out with some batshit problem. Mary's a sweet girl who's always starting clubs with her friends and taking on neighborhood projects. Many Billy stories involve one of his many friends falling into some trouble and Captain Marvel helping them out - or just exploring some fun with Billy hanging out with Sunny Smiles, who is a person of indeterminate gender who for some reason has magic love brainwashing powers -

This isn't the biggest #Shazam take, but I think a good Shazam story stays grounded in that. These are poor street kids who love Fawcett City so damn much. They love fighting their supervillains, but they love helping out the random guy off the street with their problems even more. Way more so than Spider-Man or a lot of other guys, I think of the Marvel family as the friendly neighborhood superheroes. They're both larger than life and street level. They're Superman level powers but they just use the powers for wrapping up their hijinks. Isn't that nice? Aren't you tired of going apeshit? Don't you just want to be nice?

#captain marvel #shazam #mary marvel #freddy freeman #billy batson #captain marvel jr #mary batson #i pulled open the old comics to review to write this #and as a kid I was like.#“hah! silly old silver age comics! they don't know how dumb they are!”#but reading it now im like #“holy shit i think they're doing it on purpose. holy shit. i think this is the most sarcastic comic ive ever read.”#“I don't think this is the funniest thing ever on accident. I think these were jokes. This comedy is sublime.”#genuinely they hold up SO well. they're fucking delightful.#high camp.#my writing #my asks

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mirai-e-jump · 3 months

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Murakami Erica Photobook: Admiring Erica (select pages and translation below)

Publication: May 29, 2024

Erica's Story

An ordinary high school student who was suddenly scouted one day in Harajuku, won the Grand Prix of an audition, and quickly became a "ViVi" model. After that, she also expanded her activities as an actor, and by taking on the challenge of the Super Sentai series, Erica became the nation's "princess" loved by people of all ages and genders. Including stories about her beloved family and work, this is the beginning of Erica's true story, which can only be told in a photobook.

"Congratulations on the release of your photobook 💛. What were your thoughts when you heard about it?"

Somehow, I always thought about wanting to publish a style book or a book related to beauty someday, but I never considered a photobook at all! I was surprised at first, and I couldn't imagine how it would turn out, but I knew that if I teamed up with ViVi, it would definitely be stylish, so I was really looking forward to it!

"How did it feel to actually shoot?"

The moment we started shooting, I was so excited because the photos were so stylish and had an atmosphere that only ViVi can create!!! The clothes were cute and had alittle bit of an emotional vibe to them but with the lighting that's so ViVi, ViVi is the best~ 💛.

Family Stories

-Talkative and mischievous. I'm a lively girl who grew up carefree in Fukushima-

"Erica is loved by her family, fellow models, staff and co stars. What kind of child were you during your childhood?"

I did things at my own pace from the moment I was born. I wouldn't shout, and was the kind of baby who would look around at the new world with wonder. I've been talkative and mischievous since I was young. I was a lively child, running around at the front while dragging my younger sister, younger brother, and the neighborhood children along with me. I grew up carefree in the rich nature of my hometown, Fukushima, so of course I was good with bugs. I loved to play pranks, and would catch grasshoppers and cicadas and release them at home, where my mother would often become furious with me. In elementary school, I did swimming, karuta, and piano……Since I had plenty of energy, I was able to learn a bunch of different things. From middle school, I started to dress up alittle more, and became interested in fashion and cosmetics. I'd wear the magnetic earrings I bought at the general store, and borrow and try out my mother's eyeliner without permission. In middle school, I joined the Soft Tennis Club, and while leading a club centered life, I became addicted to "Detective Conan." Mori Ran-chan was so cool, that I even tried karate for a brief time (laughs). I fell in love with the scientific field because Haibara Ai-chan was so cool, and she made me aspire to become a science researcher. From that time on, I had an otaku mind set, and would always get completely into whatever I liked.

"You must've been an actively curious child."

I was always active! I was always willing to try anything without hesitating, and even now I'm still the type of person who's curious and quick to act on whatever I want to do.

"Your father is originally from Canada. Did you go to Canada often?"

My grandfather and grandmother lived there, so I used to go there often when I was younger. When I was in middle school, me and my younger sister would spend our Summer vacations in Canada. I'd speak English together with my father, so I was able to speak it when I was a child, but I regret that I gradually became less interested in English. Now, I think I want to study English again.

"Being blunt, were you popular?"

Eh, not really (laughs). The only story I can tell you that made me alittle bit excited was when I was in high school, a friend told me that a boy from another school wanted to know my contact info. Unfortunately, I don't have that many stories of bittersweet love 💛, as I tend to become friends with the opposite sex pretty quickly.

"What kind of girl were you in high school?"

I decided to seriously pursue a career in science when I was in my first year of high school, so I went to cram school and studied hard in order to focus on entrance exams. I was involved in club activities, such as baking sweets in the laid back Family Life Club. If I got a job, I'd probably return to my hometown, so I wanted to go somewhere where I could do what I loved while being a college student, I even though, "Maybe I can study abroad!" So, I guess leaving Fukushima was the image I had in mind for my life plans. Rather than saying, "I definitely want to go to Tokyo!" I just felt like college in a city would be more exciting. I hoped that in the future I'd be able to work for a company involved in the development and research of cosmetics.

-I can be my most relaxed self when I spend time with my siblings 💛-

"Are you close with your siblings?"

My younger sister is 1 year, and younger brother is 5 years apart from me, and the three of us used to play together when we were in elementary school. When I started to enjoy fashion in high school, I lent and borrowed clothes with my sister. Since moving to the capital, I've been spending more time with my sister and brother whenever they come to Tokyo, and we often play together. It's probably because I'm the eldest daughter, but I have a strong desire to do things for my younger sister and brother. I lived with my sister when I was in college, so we were together alot. My brother's a spoiled brat and would call me to say, "I'm going to Chiba tomorrow, let's go to Disney together!" or "I want to eat sushi," and so I'll go with him. My brother has been in Tokyo since April, so I'm planning to take him to lots of places. I can be my most relaxed self when I'm spending time with my siblings.

"Do you ever fight with your siblings?"

When I lived with my sister, she often scolded me about not doing housework. My sister got angry with me when I was too busy and put off doing the laundry or dishes (laughs). Even now, I feel really bad about that. My sister was the kindest, cooking dinner for me when I worked late at night and prepping my bath. When I complained about how tired I was from work, she just let it slide in a nice way. I appreciated that as well. She knows how to treat me. Of course, when I was really having a hard time, she'd be there for me and listen to me seriously at dinner. She's my younger sister, but she's become like an older sister to me and supports me emotionally. My sister is the one who gives me the most objective opinion. She's the only one who'll say, "Onee-san, you don't look good in that outfit."

-I'm working hard at my job to show my family good things!-

"Erica loves her family."

I think my family is really close. I didn't have much of a rebellious phase, but when I was in middle school, I would pretend to be abit cool and listen to music by myself with earphones. My parents were the type to let me do what I wanted, so I was free to do whatever. On Friday nights, when my father came home alittle early, I'd fill a big bowl with my favorite snack, order pizza, and watch a movie together. My grandmother and grandfather took care of me when I was a child because both my parents worked, so I'm also very close with my grandparents. Even now, if I have two or three days off, I go back to my parents house and tell my family everything about work. I feel refreshed when I have conversations with them because I can talk with them while organizing my thoughts. They're so positive about everything I do, so if I feel like I'm lacking energy, or my self esteem is alittle low, I'll just video call them. No matter which one I call, they always come up on the screen, they're both adorable parents, always wanting to talk to me before anyone else (laughs). Once I've reached the point where I can put a pause on work, I'd like to take a family trip while my grandfather and grandmother are still healthy. The world is changing rapidly, even in just one year, so I'd like to give back alot while I can.

"What does family mean to Erica?"

It's healing. Part of me works hard because I want to show my family good things. Because I grew up in a close family, I long for marriage and want to start a family myself. I hear that many people don't want to get married these days, but I really do! (laughs), I feel like, "If you want to get married, come to my house." If there's anyone out there who's a good person, I'd like them to come and join my family.

Beauty Stories

-My private time is devoted entirely to beauty. "Erica's method" is to make a plan and keep at it for a long time-

"What's the number one thing you're interested in right now?"

It's beauty! I actually really love beauty. I love skin care and cosmetics, but I'm also interested in pilates, moxibustion, acupuncture, nutrition, diet, and anything related to health in general. I love it so much, that I now spend most of my private time on beauty.

"How long have you been into beauty?"

When I was in high school, my father had an opportunity to reevaluate his diet, and since I also had a weak stomach, we started together. The first thing I took care of was my eating habits. I started eating less additives and prioritized the vegetables from my grandparents garden. From there, I became interested in intestinal health, and since I like to do research, I got more and more into it. Since then, food and health have always been on my mind. I think that my family created the base for my healthy diet. When I was in college, I cooked for myself with vegetables from Fukushima that were sent to me, and even now I still cook for myself. Just recently, during the filming of "Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger," I brought my own bento to keep myself healthy, including onigiri for breakfast and fruit for a snack. Food is important to maintain my figure, especially during busy times. But, when I go out to eat together with everyone, I don't worry about it and put priority on having a good time. I do care about it when I eat alone, so I like to find the right balance. Instead of making everything perfect, I try to be more flexible and make the best of what I have. The important thing is the long term, so I think it's those small steps and accumulations that have led me to where I am today.

-Occasional treats are OK! If I eat, I'll cover for it the next day with adjustments and exercise-

"How do you stay in shape?"

Honestly, when I first started modeling, I thought that if I gained weight, I wouldn't get any work. Currently I don't think it's enough to be thin, and I know that it's not everything, but when I was 18 or 19 years old, I was absolutely convinced that, "I should never be fat!" The idea of exercising never came up when I thought about eating less. I went without meals for about two days for my first swimsuit shoot, which was a complete disaster as I got heat stroke and felt sick. I learned to reflect on why I needed to be thin even though I was ruining my physical condition. Now, I think it's more beautiful to have abs rather than just being thin, and I've started to take up pilates not just to keep thin, but to improve my posture. I like pilates because it builds more flexible muscles than weight training. Exercise makes you more positive, and it's good for your mental health. When I have time, I sometimes go swimming. Now, I go to do pilates 2-3 times a week, and have incorporated walking. I love walking, so I wear comfortable shoes and try to walk around as much as possible when I can.

"What are you conscious of in your daily diet?"

I eat three well balanced and proper meals. If I don't take in enough nutritions, my complexion will be ruined. Now, because of the action in King-Ohger's stage play, I have to use alot of energy, so I eat sweets every time I take a break. So, I make sure to bring dried sweet potatoes, chocolate with at least 70% cacao, and fruit for snacking. I think it's important to know what to eat, not to refrain from eating. When I occasionally receive sweets as gifts, I enjoy them and try to move my body as much as possible. In my refrigerator is natto, mozuku, mekabu, and also dried wakame and koya dofu. The freezer is always stocked with burdock and beans. When taking meals on location, I just put bonito flakes and miso in a soup jar, add hot water, and I'm good to go. Miso soup is truly great. Speaking of, the miso by my grandmother is homemade. I heard that bacteria is important, so for awhile, I'd mix my grandmother's homemade amazake with yogurt.

"What's important in maintaining your figure?"

Of course, I don't always follow a stoic diet, if there's something I'm concerned about, I eat it, but I try not to do it continuously. People don't gain that much weight if they overeat for a day or two, but if you reward yourself every day and continue to do so for a week or more, it becomes a habit and will absolutely affect your figure. Swelling is a habit after all, so I'll take care of it on that day. Of course, not eating is also stressful, so when I eat, I try to exercise as much as I can. I used to worry about swelling, but now I don't. I'm more concerned about what kind of condition I want to be in on a regular basis. Rather than cramming everything together and doing alot of different things, I'd rather be in a state where I can make consistent progress every day and not have to do anything special. That's what motivates me, and when I want to have fun, I enjoy myself to the fullest and then make adjustments the next day. I guess that's the most like me.

-Always checking beauty care info while taking a long bath!-

"Tell us your at home beauty routine!"

At home, I use a foam roller to stretch and loosen up my muscles. I also use an easy to apply sticker type of moxibustion to warm up pressure points on my feet and improve blood circulation. When I'm tired, I love to use "Kyusoku Jikan Pressure Point Stimulating Gel Sheets" and going to bed because it makes my legs feel lighter 💛 also, it's important to take a long bath. I add bath salts like epsom salt and himalayan salt, and while soaking in the tub for 40 to 50 minutes, I'll search for beauty care info. When I want to warm myself up, I sometimes add sake. When I sleep, sometimes I'll wear medical compression socks. Also, I heard that it's good to sleep with a warm body, so until Winter ends, I put disposable hand warmers on my futon and wear "Nightmin Warming Earplugs" when I sleep. Recently, I bought a Zojirushi humidifier and it works great! It's good for my health and makes my skin feel soft.

"Do you take supplements?"

Honestly, I don't think anything can compete with food, but for this photobook, I also took extra of my favorite supplements. Recently, I've been taking Lypo-C in the morning and Lypo-CC+D at night. When I was alittle concerned about the condition of my skin, I got a prescription for coix seed from my hospital. I started taking it to treat water warts, but at the time, I got compliments on my skin, so I only take it before important events. Plus, I take Vitamin B for skin and fatigue, and glutathione for when I'm drinking alcohol. I heard that glutathione improves liver metabolism, and since I also like to drink, I always keep some handy. I'm currently interested in collagen supplements. As I get older, my problems will also change, so I'm always exchanging information with hair and makeup artists and beauty authors, and I actively try out new things that interest me. By the way, if I'm really busy, I can also rely on nutritional supplements. I use Chocola BB and Alinamin, and also the Orthomol that I bought from Korea, as they give me energy.

-I love acupuncture 💛 I also incorporate beauty clinics for skin care-

"Tell us what beauty places Erica goes to!"

I've been going for acupuncture once a month for about 3 years. I started going to improve my poor circulation, sensitivity to cold, and stiff shoulders, and I became addicted to how good I felt when waking up the next day. It seems to have a detoxifying effect that makes my body feel refreshed. The doctor is very knowledgeable about beauty and taught me some basics, like because I have a weak stomach, eating too many raw vegetables isn't good for my digestion, and that I should avoid coffee as the first thing I have in the morning.

"Do you go to beauty clinics?"

I go! Basically, my main focus is skin care, as I had rough skin around the time I moved to Tokyo, so I started looking for a beauty clinic to fix it, and then I started going to different ones. Laser toning treatments had visible results, and that's how I became hooked. Currently, I use a proper amount of both aesthetic and beauty clinics. I regularly go to "Aesthetic Salon CIEL" for facial contouring, where even sensitive skin can be managed. I don't do strong procedures that require downtime, but when I want to feel the power of medical treatments, such as toning or making acne scars less visible, I sometimes turn to cosmetic medicine. Recently, I heard that titanium lifting is a good thing, so I immediately made an appointment. I'm also interested in skin boosters. The idea is to not just slim down facial lines, but to have skin that looks healthy and tight.

-Beauty is my hobby. I always want to improve myself-

"What skincare regimen are you into lately?"

Since the beauty clinic will be thorough, my skin care regimen is basically protective. Currently, I love carbonated beauty. I like carbonated face washes, and use things like suisai's "Beauty Clear Fizzy Powder Wash," which I think as a side effect feels like it refreshes the area around my face! For a period of time, I was so addicted to it, that I used to make carbonated water with a "Soda Stream" and wash my face with it. I'll often use foam carbonation packs on my scalp. I also like fermented ingredients and will try out various kinds.

"What is Erica's goal with beauty?"

Smooth and soft skin! And above all else, health. Rather than wanting to be like someone else, I always want to better my image. Beauty for me is a hobby. It lifts my spirits and helps me "reset." It's my precious time 💛.

Work Stories

-I want to try something new! I dove into this world out of curiosity 💛-

"Now then, let's look back at Erica's work. When was the turning point?"

I participated in "High School Quiz" when I was in my second year of high school. I won the competition and was going on to compete in the national level, and while I was walking around Harajuku, excited to be in Tokyo for the first time, I was scouted by my current agency. I had previously been scouted in my hometown, but I turned them all down because I was preparing for exams. However, they asked for my contact info since I wasn't affiliated with an agency, and so we exchanged info. About six months later, I was recommended to audition for ViVi by the agency, and thankfully, I won the Grand Prix and became a ViVi model.

"Why did you decide to audition?"

I'm not swayed by trends, I'm just an ordinary girl. I had read ViVi before, but I was just a high school student who thought that the entertainment industry was a world I had no connection to, and that I'd just go on to higher education and find a job. Still, I like to try new things, and I thought it'd be simple and interesting, so I dove into this world out of curiosity.

"You auditioned as part of the experience and it changed your life."

I had a simple feeling about the audition, thinking, "I get to go to Tokyo, it's like a trip, it's going to be fun 💛." That's why I was really surprised when I passed. More than anything, my mother was happy. My mother's a huge fan of Hasegawa Jun-san, so when I told her about the ViVi audition, she was excited and said, "I think Erica will definitely become a ViVi model!" and I think she was more excited than I was when I passed. I was also happy to win the Grand Prix, but it was memorable to see how the many people around me, including my family and grandparents, were happy for me.

"Was there ever a moment during an audition when you thought you'd be accepted?"

Not at all. For the second round of selection, we were allowed to wear casual clothes, but I was told by my agency to "wear a white T shirt and shorts!" and I went to the venue as instructed, but everyone there was very fashionable. I thought, "Ah, I look completely out of place. This is the end." But, on the other hand, I think I stood out (laughs). Until the end, it never once crossed my mind that, "Maybe I'll be accepted?!" I felt like I'd just be lucky if I made it to the final round.

"The final selection was on the runway at the "Girls Award." Were you nervous about walking in front of an audience?"

To be honest, at the time I had no idea how enormous the "Girls Award" was. I was nervous, but I didn't really feel like I was standing on a big stage. It felt like, "There are so many famous people here!" If I failed here, I wouldn't have been able to study for entrance exams, and I wouldn't know what to do about going on to college.

"Tell us how you felt when you passed!"

Simply put, I was shocked. I received a bouquet of flowers from Yamashita Tomohisa-san and thought, "Ah, so this is Tokyo. I'm standing in the same place as a celebrity." I think I was rather calm.

"When did you finally realize that you had become a model?"

I commuted from Fukushima during high school, but at first I didn't get much work, and I guess I didn't really feel like a model. During my first year in college, I was so focused on my schoolwork to earn credits that I had very few jobs outside of ViVi. Toward the end of my first year, the amount of work gradually expanded, and I felt that my modeling work was becoming more and more fulfilling.

-Balancing schoolwork and being a ViVi model. My friends were there to help me get through it-

"Did you decide not to apply for college after being accepted as a ViVi model?"

I had always wanted to go to college, and I thought it'd be more fun to try different things and absorb different things than to follow one path. Since I suddenly became a model, I think I had the sense that college was my base, and I just happened to be lucky enough to be able to model. Since the path of modeling is a narrow one, I was determined to try to find a job if I were to stop modeling. I went on to study business administration at a science college, and what I studied has led me to where I am today, and as a result, many things have turned out well. The biggest change since becoming a ViVi model is that it's become easier to try new things. I think I've become more willing to try anything and everything without being afraid.

"Was it difficult to balance college with your career?"

In my first and second year, I prioritized my studies, and I didn't feel like I was doing that much work, so it wasn't hard. I was also living on my own for the first time and enjoying college life. In fact, I even talked to my agency about wanting to work more. But, it wasn't easy getting work, so I was prepared to do my best for when the opportunity arose. Around the beginning of my second year, I started taking more online classes due to the covid pandemic, which led to more jobs outside of ViVi, so I started to enjoy modeling more. Since that time, I've been trying my hand at acting during long vacations. The end of my fourth year (second semester) was honestly a tough time for me because I was balancing modeling, acting, and schoolwork. However, I think I was able to overcome these challenges due to having friendly competition with my college friends.

"What inspired you to start acting?"

It all started when I was asked if I wanted to audition for the drama "Black Cinderella." Everything was new to me, so I didn't know right from left, and it all happened so fast~. I did the best I could everyday, and afterwards I'd feel like I was burnt out. My first acting job was a bigger role than I expected, and the pressure was also intense. I had to memorize my lines and act. I started it casually, wanting to take on a new challenge, but it was harder than I imagined. I felt so tense for so long, that when the drama ended and I went to a ViVi photo shoot, I couldn't help but cry because I felt so relieved. I think I was able to overcome a large part of it because I was blessed with the right people. I'm still good friends with the Black Cinderella members, and my connection with its staff led me to my current job with King-Ohger. I'd like to help others someday myself, but I can't afford to do so yet. I'd like to return the favor someday.

"Did Black Cinderella inspire you to become an actor?"

Honestly, I felt I had to work harder because I couldn't do anything. I didn't have anything in mind for my next project, but I started attending private lessons that I found on my own, preparing for the day that would someday come.

-If I'm going to do the same thing for a year, I want to spend a year different from the one before. With this in mind, I challenged myself to Super Sentai-

"Erica's popularity has grown dramatically with King-Ohger, but how did it feel to take on the challenge of joining Super Sentai?"

When I was in my fourth year of college, I was asked to audition. But, to be honest, I wasn't sure if I'd accept the role at first. It isn't often you get approached for an offer for Super Sentai, so I think it was fate that I was asked. However, I talked to my parents about what to do since it was too different from the career I had been doing up to that point. At that time, my parents told me that I had once said, "If I'm going to do the same thing for a year, I want to spend a year different from the one before." I had forgotten those words, but when I heard them, I thought that was the way I wanted to live my life, so I made the decision to take it.

"What worried you the most?"

Honestly, Super Sentai has a tighter schedule than regular dramas, and you have to focus on your role for a year and a half, so I was worried that I wouldn't be able to work as a model. I thought that if I left for a year and a half, alot of new kids would come in during that time, and that once I went, I might not be able to come back. As you can imagine, I was hardly able to shoot for ViVi when filming for Super Sentai began. The number of projects decreased all at once, and there were months where I had no shoots at all, which made me feel very lonely. I couldn't wait to appear in ViVi.

"That was the most difficult time for you to balance both."

When the number of projects decreased, I wondered if ViVi no longer needed me. I wanted to spend more time modeling, but I also had to make sure I was doing my acting work, so I was really stressed out. I wanted to make ViVi my top priority in the past and still do. But, I didn't want to give up the acting career that I've secured. I was conflicted and thought, "I want to do both!" Moreover, I also had to give up modeling to take on Super Sentai, but my acting wasn't perfect, and it was really hard to keep up with everyone. I was also writing my college thesis at that time, so I was full of energy both physically and mentally. In my spare time between filming, I communicated with my professor and worked with all my might to finish my thesis.

"If you had to give yourself a score as an actor, what would it be?"

It'd still be a minus. However, I think it's a huge plus in my life. My values have changed in alot of ways. At first, I thought I was a model and not suited for acting, but recently, I've come around to where I think acting might be kind of fun.

"What did you gain from working hard in modeling, schoolwork, and acting?"

It all comes down to experience and time, doesn't it? In both modeling and acting, you learn by doing things over and over again, so in that sense, I think the past year and a half has been really important. I tried to pick up everything I could, and absorbed lots of different things. Also, by trying to do many things and working hard, I don't focus too much on one thing, so I don't have to think about unnecessary things. Besides, people I've worked with in the past say they want to work with me again. In the entertainment world, you don't have a job unless someone needs you, so I feel like I'm able to work thanks to people like that. All of my work comes about through fortunate connections, so I want to cherish each and every one of those connections.

-Modeling and acting, I want to do it all. That's because I love it all!-

Please give a message for those who are struggling to balance multiple things they want to do!

If you have alot of things you want to do right now, I think it's okay to try doing both. Of course, there'll be hardships, but sometimes you'll find help from places you least expect. It's important to have goals in life, as it'd be a waste to spend time doing nothing. In my case, both modeling and my acting jobs have had a big impact on my private life. I feel that we can learn alot about how to live from our work.

"From now on, you'll work hard to balance being both a model and an actor."

Currently, I really enjoy working as a model as I did before. It's like I'm back 💛. I've had very little time off this year, but it's been so fulfilling that I don't find it tiring at all. I think it's best to have a job while you still can. Some models focus on acting, but I want to keep being a model and actor at the same time because I love it all. I love ViVi, and I'd like to increase what I can do based on that, and give back to ViVi what I've gained in other fields. Some people leave a group or graduate from a magazine to take the next step, but I think it's good to try a variety of things while staying in the same place, and I think studying and trying different things at the same time, rather than just one thing, fits my way of life.

"Since overcoming the challenges of balancing studies and a job, has your attitude toward work changed?"

In the past, I used to think that I had to be cool or be nice to get a job, but now I think I've become able to prioritize being myself. Even with ViVi, I used to follow the backs of my seniors, but before I knew it, I became a senior myself, and I felt I had to stand tall. Sometimes I think I need to be more firm with my juniors and show them that I'm good at what I do. However, I think it'd be better to be friendly and expose my faults, because then people would talk to me openly. Of course I do it when I need to, but I think that maybe it's more like me not to try too hard. I can't "graduate" when I haven't done anything yet. I feel like I want to be spoiled even more.

"What kind of place is ViVi to Erica?"

ViVi has a very strong sense of camaraderie, and I feel like we all look out for each other and help each other improve. ViVi is my home, my family, and a place that inspires me. Modeling is also where my roots are, so I'd like to challenge myself to various things without losing sight of my role as a model.

#long post #erica murakami #murakami erica #hymeno ran #himeno ran #super sentai cast #ohsama sentai kingohger #kingohger #super sentai #my scans #my translation #toku cast #tokusatsu #ohsama sentai king ohger #king ohger #interview #fashion #the cowboy hat photos were my favorites #and her beauty regimen is...alot 😳📝

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badkitty3000 · 2 months

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Do you think Five was attracted at all to Viktor as a child?

This is going to be a controversial answer, so before I begin, I would like everyone taking the time to read this to know that I do not consider myself any type of Five or TUA authority. I respect everyone's take on all of the characters' backstories and personalities, etc. and I hope they respect mine in return. After all, this is fiction, and I am in no way trying to offend anyone. I believe we can all share this happy, fun fandom with our different theories and headcanons!❤️😊

With that out of the way, no, I don't think Five was attracted to Viktor as a child. I realize I'm most likely in the minority here, but I just don't see it. And I know, Aidan Gallagher has said that he thought Five and Viktor had a crush on one another when they were kids, so I should probably adopt that as canon, but...I just can't. And this has nothing to do with gender, Five or Viktor's sexuality, or his coming out as trans later in the story. The reason I have a really hard time wrapping my head around that is because of their personalities.

Now, I'm going to say something else controversial here, so please don't throw rocks at my head. Viktor is boring. And kind of whiny. And very annoying. There, I said it...I'm sorry! 😫

He has his merits, don't get me wrong, and I admire Elliot Page as an actor. But the character of Viktor just seems so completely opposite of Five that it's very hard to imagine the attraction there.

Maybe when they were younger, they were close, as stated in Viktor's book. They all seem to have kind of paired off at one point or another during childhood, so that I can believe. The entire family was isolated and brought up under weird circumstances and I don't fault any them for any attraction between one another. But come on...Viktor? He's just not going to do it for Five. At least on a level other than brother/friend/confidant relationship.

Unfortunately, we do not get much of their childhood before Five disappears, or really even after. The only thing we get to see that we can piece together (that isn't in the book, since we only know that from the good folks online that have shared their pics of the zoomed in text) is that Viktor doesn't think Five should jump (they look at each other and he shakes his head), Viktor left out sandwiches for Five after he left, and Five goes to him first to tell him about the Apocalypse when he returns. That's kind of it and it's not much to go on.

Five is such a wild card, and full of energy and smug attitude, and overall asshole-ness, that it's hard for me to picture the two of them together in any romantic way. Viktor is such a wet blanket and I can't imagine Five finding that very attractive. Even as a kid, I just can't see it. Friends: yes; More than friends: no.

Here's another hot take that no one asked for: I don't think Five was wrong in threatening to kill Viktor in season 3. The whole thing with Harlan was irritating and Viktor basically took Harlan's side and risked everyone's life to try and save him. Yes, I know, Five can be called the villain here because he works alone as well, but...at least everything he's done has been with his family's interest at heart. Viktor just up and fucked them over. So yeah...I kind of understood his point.

Obviously, I have some blinders on here, and I admit that. Five is my favorite character and I rarely concede that he does anything wrong. He is the love of my (fictional) life and no one else comes close. So, I'm sorry and I know this is not a popular opinion. Please forgive me!! 😭😂

This got a little out of hand for such a simple question...oops! I fully expect backlash on this, but that's ok. And I truly have nothing against any Viktor/Five shippers out there. Like I said, this is all fiction and it's supposed to be fun!

Peace and love! ☮️❤️😽

#please don't come after me with pitchforks #five hargreeves #number five #viktor hargreeves #the umbrella academy #tua #umbrella academy #anon ask #number five headcanon #five hargreeves headcanon

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friesian · 4 months

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my father is dead and i couldn't be happier.

the following is a sort of. reconciliation/vent post since i just got the news a few hours ago that my father died, and i finally feel like i can sort of talk about everything that happened to me as a child. for the first time. without the threat of potential violence. so. tw for neglect, abuse, parental death and honestly just. a lot. if you don't like the most stereotypical 'bad dad' shit, don't read this post.

my father was a cruel man. it was only until recently i was informed that my father used to actually shake me as a baby, no more than a few days old. when i was a few months old, he used to do the same to watch my 'funny reactions' and had to be actively reprimanded by aunt and mother in order to get him to stop lest i die a very sudden death.

when i was a little kid, my father i guess got this idea in his head that i was a little innocent flower and that if anything touched me, that'd be it. i'd be sullied. i'd be dirtied. somehow 'impure'. mind you, my father wasn't a religious man. really, honestly, the opposite. i wasn't allowed to talk about religion or god, explore spirituality, really have 'faith'. this would earn me hostile looks, a loud scolding, or called stupid. this also might displace onto my mom, who received it much worse than me.

when i was 7, my father made the move to go somewhere out into the deep west virginia mountains where i would never be in danger. except by him. we moved to a place where the closest store was 45 minutes by car, getting home from school was 35 minutes-- not counting school bus routes, that was up to 2-3 hours-- and there was not a single neighbor that could see the house nor talk to us. we were alone. for good. for over 11 years of my life i was alone in a house with a man who grew actively more and more hostile to being in that house. as i aged, tried to be a teenager, explore my gender, sexuality, ect. it was all shut down. my computer-- my only lifeline-- was bugged with spyware that allowed him to look at my screen and take control of anything i was doing. a vivid memory of mine is when i used to write fanfiction of innocent teenager things. kissing, holding hands, professions of love, the usual-- nothing explicit. at some point i was caught and had my computer thrown and i was screamed it. i could only run to my room and cry, and hope i wasn't chased. this left me with no sense of privacy, as any computer or technology i ever got passed through him, and as he was a engineer for networking, most things were bugged by him first as much as i tried to remove them. my mom suffered similarly to i, both of us being called slurs and having things thrown at us for existing in his radius. we walked on eggshells. we had no room to breathe. if we weren't in his general space, we were yelled at for avoiding him. if we were actually there, we were yelled at for laughing or even breathing too loud. there was no right answer. my friends never wanted to visit because of him, or he would often get mad at their parents for being 'flakes' or 'untimely', leading for me to be berated about my choice of friend. i wasn't allowed to go out unless it was with 'other girls', and i didn't have many friends to begin with due to the many social problems i faced due to his neglect. i grew up in that house, with many other issues i can't even begin to list, but i grew up and left as soon as i could, and didn't really do much. mostly just coasted by after dropping out of college that he pressured me to be in, lest i end up homeless. my mom divorced him shortly after i left due to being threatened with a gun, and at that point i was pretty sure he was officially off the deep end. this is sort of my 'getting it off my chest' moment as i was never able to speak out about what i faced in any regard due to him consistently monitoring my online presence. for all i know, he could've known about this blog-- choosing to hold onto it for some sort of legal proceeding as he had done to my mother. he tracked her car, recorded her calls, did everything he could to fuck her over. his father did something similar to him back in the 90s, and i needed to avoid it at all costs.

he never got the chance now. i never felt like i had a father, more like an angry dragon that guarded a tower with someone who didn't wanna be there. some sort of 'king' that transformed into a dragon, i suppose. but, i remember relating a lot to the imagery of people trapped in towers by beasts. i wanted to make a comic about it at one point. 11 years of solidarity does a lot to a motherfucker.

to this hour, i haven't shed a tear. i cheered and celebrated, put on my mask as i'm talking to the funeral home people, family, his friends, whatever it is. i've just been blaise and calm. i have to go back to my 'tower' this weekend and see it for the first time in years, now with the memory of my father dead seeped in those walls.

it's been a relief i didn't know i needed, but that house haunts me with the horrors that went on in it. i guess this is sort of my testimony to his life. i refuse to have a funeral. i refuse to have a memorial. he's being cremated and disposed of as soon as i can. i can already tell what little remains of his side of the family has an issue with it, but i don't care. they didn't live the life me and my mom had, and they never will now. for what it's worth, somehow, even though i was forged in fires that i don't think any man should go through-- it made me a more hardened and aware person. you get time to think when you're alone for 11 years. a lot of time to see emotions, patterns, understand, and just pick things apart. he never knew me, elf, he knew my dead name. and i'm thankful for that. i came out a good man all things considered, i have my flaws and issues, but who doesn't. but at least i never was like him. here's to getting out of the tower.

#ly talks #tw parent death #tw abuse #tw trauma #just. the whole nine yards.#thanks for reading if you did. it feels good to put down words to what i experienced finally. i don't have to be quiet anymore.#i might be quiet-er these next few weeks handling all the legal stuff. sorry.

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starrylayle · 8 months

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My fave marauders ships and dynamics as a multi-shipper !! Ok so, there are certain ships I like to imagine as canon in the canon universe, and there are other ships that I prefer in aus and such but still ship them so much!! So I thought I’d just ramble abt them here lol.

My fave ships that are canon/I think I should be endgame:

First off, Jily ofc. My loves. I’m generally not super excited abt str8 couples but they’re just too cute. My fave dynamic with them is that they’re academic rivals — well at least lily thinks they are, James is just hopelessly in love with her and enjoys competition lol. Lily thinks he’s an idiot, immature and a bit of a bully at first but slowly warms up to him as she sees his kind-heartedness and stance on justice. Plus, she’s always found him a little hot :)

Wolfstar, duh. I don’t think I have to go into detail coz I already do so much on my blog lol.

Dorlene — aaah I love my tragic, angsty lil lesbians. Sucker for the quidditch-rivals-to-lovers trope. Ooh and i headcanon Dorcas as transfem. But yeah if you’ve read ‘the hands that feeds’ by rollercoasterwords that’s basically how I see their dynamic.

Fralice — cuties and did not deserve the ending they got ;((

Rosekiller — ok, ok. I know I’ve ranted abt how I don’t like the fanonization of their characters in fandom,, but I will admit I do like them together. Especially when they’re depicted as the awful people they are lol. I like to think that they’re still hooking up in GoF on nights where barty’s poly juice wears off lmaoo. Also random but I hc Barty to be in ravenclaw.

Pandora x Xenophillius (idk how to spell his name) — I like to imagine Pandora as a goth who runs an underground magical weed business and Xeno as a hippie weirdo and conspiracy theorist. Both are bi/pan tho and have def hooked up with ppl of the same gender before.

Andromeda x Ted Tonks — iconic. Love them. Andy was the og rebellious black family child.

Emmary — love, love this ship. For context, I picture Emmaline as a little older than Mary (maybe 2 or 3 years) and they meet when Em’s at the order. Mary’s a bisexual girlie who’s predominantly been with men at this point, and Em’s a big Butch lesbian who loves Mary so much but isn’t sure if Mary likes her back, at first. Ofc they end up together after the first war but when Em wants to join the second war, Mary oblivates herself and retreats to the muggle world entirely because she cannot bear more pain.

My fave ships that I like to think are semi-canon, as in their unrequited, or right person wrong time, or both have feelings that the other doesn’t know — they just don’t workout for some reason:

First off, Marylene — my absolute fave, right person, wrong time ship. Love the whole, ‘Marlene loved her too early, Mary loved her too late idea’. I’m a sucker for best friends to lovers ahhh. I imagine that Marls had crush on Mary since they were eleven and came out to her later, and although Mary was supportive she didn’t like her back at that point. Then Marls got with Dorcas and maybe Mary got a tad bit jealous. And then Marlene was killed ofc so Mary moved on and went with Emmaline, but she never really stopped loving Marlene.

Nobleflower — bi narcissa and Alice rights!! I like to think that they had a bit of a homoerotic friendship back in their hogwarts years, but the fact that they were on opposite sides eventually pulled them apart. And so Alice gets with Frank and Narcissa with Malfoy. Aaah so tragic I love them

Lily x Remus — I like to think Lily had a little crush on Remus when they were younger but she got over it and they became besties !!

Bellatrix / Lady Zabini — Toxic murder comphet lesbians!! Tho I imagine they ‘broke up’ their fling coz Bellatrix was murdering with pure blood fascism in mind,,, and lady Zabini was just like,, why can’t we just kill ppl for the sake of killing them?? 🥺🥺

Jegulus — ok so I don’t like jegulus as a canon(ish) ship, buuut I love me some unrequited jegulus, specifically from Regulus’ side coz sorry I just personally don’t see James ever liking Reg in canon. I imagine Reg goes into hogwarts wanting to hate the guy who stole his brother but ends up falling for him just the same. He has internalised homophobia and hates the fact that he’s gay, esp for someone like James lol.

Bartylus — My hc is that neither of them liked each other romantically, but they settled and got off each other to pass time. It’s transactional, at least it’s starts off being..maybe barty’s a little more into it than reg thinks they are.

Peter/Bertha Jorkins — I like to imagine they dated for awhile during hogwarts — until Bertha got bored of him and dumped him. Peter never really got over it and was still bitter.

Peter/Sybil — oooh I remember this one was trending on marauders tik tok awhile back but I’m still not over it. Happens after Bertha/Peter. Sybil breaks up with Peter maybe coz she gets a prophecy that he becomes evil. Peter is confused and heartbroken.

Snily — ok hear me out!! I don’t care for their portrayals in a lot of fics coz I think the pro / anti Snape bias is always there — but I would be open to exploring the complexity of their dynamic in a fic when snapes actions aren’t justified or excused, but he’s not portrayed as a one dimensional bad guy. And I think it would be interesting to explore more of Lily’s character and why she stuck by him so long.

Ok, now onto ships that I only enjoy in aus:

Marylily/macevans — by far my fave ship in aus. Best friends to lovers >>>> also half the marauders edits saved on my phone are marylily edits lmaoo they’re just so cute!!

Jegulus — requited this time!! If it’s an au and James is not reduced to a generic sunshine people pleasing character, then they’re a little cute I’ll admit. Not the biggest fan of the 'best friend's brother' trope but the drama is entertaining at least.

Mary/Dorcas — I don’t think they’re a very popular on here but I personally like it. In a way they’re opposites but they’re motivations are a lot more similar than they realise.

Pandalily — so, so cute. Fanart is spectacular

Dorlily — so academic rivals to lovers coded

Prongsfoot — specifically in aus where James and Sirius are on opposing sides, for example, slytherin!Sirius au

Wolfstarbucks — James and sirius share everything!! Including their lovers apparently. Mostly enjoy it as a crack ship tho.

Well this was fun!! I love multi-shipping <33

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