DC Comics Incorrect Quotes Pt 30
Connor: Sexual attraction? In this economy?
Crush: I got a ghost I need busted.
Harley: Call the ghost busters.
Crush: Do they have a website or app?
Harley: No, you gotta call.
Crush: Guess I'm stuck with this fucking ghost then.
Kate: Everybody has a bad cousin that teaches you a few things.
Kate: Like how to smoke, how to pickpocket, how to hotwire a car, how to put tacks in your shoes to throw off lie detector tests.
Tim: Which cousin was this?
Kate: ... I am the cousin.
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Today on Daffy's DC thoughts: I'm so glad we got to see Jules' top surgery scars in DC Pride #1 2023. I am so glad Crush got to hang out with Poison Ivy and Harley. I loved Connor and Tim got to bond over their experiences and talk about how coming out and not coming out has affected them both. I FUCKING LOVE MIDNIGHTER AND APOLLO in ANYTHING. This was just. It was an excellent pride special.
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Alfred is getting up there in age. It's time for him to go see the Ghost King, and uphold his end of their deal.
He tells Bruce that he needs to return to England for a bit, to meet up with some old friends.
Gets the Manor prepared for life without him.
And as he's standing in his room, luggage packed and ready to go, Bruce knocks on the door.
"You don't have any plane tickets purchased," Bruce starts, looking concerned.
"Indeed, I have not."
"There's no correspondence between you or your friends to indicate a visitation."
"I suppose I should have expected your insatiable curiosity would lead to that breach of privacy," Alfred sighs, resting a hand on his luggage.
"...Where are you really going?"
Alfred doesn't answer. Bruce has dug enough, and perhaps he deserves a little confusion.
What Alfred does do is snap a small, glowing crystal. One that looked like Kryptonite, but was not.
A portal opens before him, and before Bruce can reach him, Alfred calmly steps through.
The portal shuts behind him.
He turns to face the Ghost King.
"Ã̵͙̤̚͜r̶͓̓ȇ̵̢͝ ̸̝͂͠ẙ̶̘̳̿o̷͈̎͋̽u̵͈̔ ̸̖͉̔ṛ̸̅̀͆e̸͉̓̂͒a̴̻̓͝d̵̬̉̏̉ỳ̶̬͂̕?̴̼̈́͗̀"
Alfred nods.
The Ghost King's face breaks out into a wide smile.
"I believe I have put together a menu that will satisfy you, My King."
~~~~~~
Two months later sees Alfred being given another crystal, and a portal opened for him back to the Manor.
Alfred steps through, a bounce in his step and not a speck of grey in his hair, looking for all the world like he's twenty again.
Now, how is he going to explain this to the very sleep-deprived looking Master Tim sitting on his bedroom floor, staring at him with unfocused eyes?
Or: Alfred made a deal with the Ghost King when he was twenty and dying in the remains of his ship, just after the Battle of Trafalgar in 1805.
If he can cook food the King has never tasted before, and keep it up for two months, the King will put forward his case to the God of Time and rewind him to the point in his life three days before he was grievously wounded.
Basically, he gets to go back to being a 20 year old.
He staves it off for as long as he can, often getting quite elderly, before breaking that crystal and serving two months of full courses to the King of the Dead.
He hasn't told anyone this.
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