#everything sucks. everything is horrible. i just wish i were dead

[fqiryspit]

FOOTBALL PLAYER EREN HEADCANONS

eren x fem!reader

cw: eren is head over heels for you, crazy fangirls, death threats, eren fucking you, you sucking him, etc etc

you've been in a relationship with eren before his hair was that long and when he stumbled nervously over everything.

he still looks back and cringes, wondering why you wanted to date him

you two have been lifelong friends and once you started your relationship things really were perfect.

eren's football career really took off in college, and he got a lot more attention from the girls on campus rather than old men.

soon he and his team were absolutely famous and you were so excited for him -and incredibly grateful your relationship was swiped under the rug during that time. he had millions of fan girls posting fics and edits of him daily, it was insane.

you asked him to not speak on your relationship -because he got those questions a lot so he just responds with a simple "I'm happy" when they get asked

he wants to -so badly- show you off. to laugh at all his annoying fan girls and bring you out, but, he respects your decision.

after his games, he is absolutely wrecked. he flops down onto the bed and you climb on top of him and start massaging his scalp and he just moans into the sheets

"did you have fun?"

"how was I supposed to have fun when you weren't there?" he says, needy as ever

"errreeen I'm not gonna be able to go that far for every game" you huff

.

and this man loves to spoil you. designer bags out of the blue, wait, did you just eye that coat? no worries, he's just gonna purchase that really quickly.

eren truly truly loves you, he knows he is gonna marry you, it's just a fact.

he melts when he is with you, always needing to hold you in some way and just have you near.

he fanaticizes about your wedding and babies with you late at night or when he's balls deep in you

"fuck, can't wait to fill you up with my babies, gonna make you a mommy"

and by the way, after a game. a win or a loss, he's fucking you.

if he won, he's letting his victory in your pussy, ramming into you over and over while your legs bend in abnormal positions every two seconds while he babbles about how he couldn't get his mind off you the whole time

if he lost...oh man. he's taking all that anger out on you. it goes on for hours until he is finally drained and calm while you lay there full of his cum.

before a conference, you give him a "good luck suck" because he hates going to them, and this makes him feel a lot better <3

.

his fans are crazy, and once they caught wind of your relationship, all hell broke loose.

a photo came to light of eren simply hugging you. you know how careful he is with that stuff so you hid it from him, knowing he rarely goes on social media it should be a breeze, right?

you had your knees up to your chest and a twisted brow on, reading through the death threats and horrible comments made about your appearance.

you're an idiot for not privating your account in time, they found you and are coming in full swing.

you felt your stomach sink, you shouldn't let them get to you, but they're pointing out insecurities you've been trying to bury

"you okay?"

you look up to see eren, in the doorway with a concerned look all over his face. you turn off your phone and put a smile on

"yeah, just stupid stuff" you chuckle uncomfortably. he walks over and climbs onto the bed

"what happened?" "nothing, eren"

he looked at you for a couple more seconds, giving you the option to tell him what was going on. then his eyes slowly traveled to your phone you tossed across the bed. you reached for it franticly but he got it in time and as you yelled out his name he unlocked it with his face

everything on his face just dropped in an instant, he read through message after message about people wishing you dead, saying not-so-nice things about your looks, and more.

he asked when this started while he kept staring into the phone, then asked why you didn't tell him.

"I knew it would worry you, so I just-" "you need to tell me these things" he reached over to grab his phone as he started typing, you looked over to see him making a twitter post and you freaked

"don't say anything about it!" you plead, but it was too late, he made a simple post yelling at his 'fans' and then turned his phone off and held you

"please don't worry about those stupid messages"

.

in all, footballplayer!eren is the man of your dreams, and he hopes you haven't found the ring box in his sock drawer yet. <3

an: love him sm <3

[a-local-idiots-shitpost]

Mc ate Solomon´s food

Lucifer:

he was ready to dial for every type of emergency services they have in the Devildom before you can even think about dying

but to his surprise you didn´t even flinch

and Lucifer came to the only viable conclusion, Solomon managed to clone and keeps the real you locked up somewhere while the clone has to manipulate him to say yes to a pact

but you keep insisting your the real you so he slightly believes you

but he still wants to know how you survived that and honestly no explanation will make him belief you

especially if it´s that it just randomly happened

he´s still convinced that´s just one of Solomon´s weird plans and you aren´t the real you

Mammon:

he was ready to play real life Romeo and Juliet when he thought you died because you fainted

but good thing you woke up before he could go through with it

and he´s losing it when you tell him you´re immune apparently

because that means you were ready to just deal with whatever this abomination Solomon calls food will cause

I mean he´s happy you did survive but he would have just preferred it if you just did not eat it and gave him a heart attack

and warned him beforehand that Solomon dumped his food onto them

who knows what would have happened if somebody didn´t pay attention and accidentally ate it

Leviathan:

he thinks your a Zombie back from the dead to torment him for not stopping your Death aaand now you´re pissed of because he insulted you

which is a fair thing to say because the only thing that´s different is that you look a bit tired and that was Levi´s fault he demanded that you play games with him the entire day and night

but you also ate whatever Solomon made and left in the House of Lamentation so maybe it isn´t that far fetched to think you died and came back

at least Levi is sorry for calling you a Zombie but now he just wants to know if you achieved IRL god mode and just are unable to be killed

and no he will not accept that you´re just immune to whatever Solomon makes

Satan:

it was nice knowing you, but Satan has to hurry or he´ll miss the ally Cats

there is plenty of time to mourn when he has time but he has priorities that are very time limited

and imagine his surprise when he comes Home hours later and your sitting in his room and glaring at him

I mean it´s great you´re alive and everything but now he kinda wished you would have died because you look very angry because he was willing to let you die just so he can play with Cats

and the worst part is that you didn´t get a chance to play with the Cats because he ditched you as soon as he thought you were dead

but sucks to be him because you saw Lucifer and told him what happened, shows him to just leave you just so he can play with Cats and not take you with him

Asmodeus:

he sacrificed you to Solomon so he doesn´t have to die, I mean he loves and would die for you but not like this, never like this

he promises he will lay a Rose on your grave every week and will coordinate your funeral himself

maybe… depends on when it happens he has a bunch of parties planned so he might not remember or won´t be able to to plan your funeral

but it´s a good thing he won´t have to! because you survived, yay!

wait why are you saying you´re going to leave with Solomon? oh come on it´s not because he said he won´t plan your funeral!? he´s a very busy Demon so you can´t blame him!

okay he takes it back he would plan your funeral just don´t leave with the person who´s neglectful behavior nearly killed you, I mean he wanted to sacrifice you so he can live but his point still stands

Beelzebub:

before you die you have to tell him where your secret snack stash is, just because your gone doesn´t mean the snacks also have to die

I mean he´s you´re going to die but he really wants the forbidden snacks, the only food in the House he can never find

and now he feels like he did a horrible mistake asking that because as it turns out you managed to survive and you aren´t happy he just wants you snacks

you even gave him the worst punishment he could ever get, you said you´ll refuse to talk to him for the rest of the week

in his opinion it´s far to cruel just because he ignored that you could have died and thought your Human world snacks are more important

Belphegor:

he´s already planning your funeral when he sees Solomon forcing you to eat whatever he made

and imagine his surprise when you don´t drop dead or faint, I mean you look ready to run and empty your stomach as soon as you can but you´re not dead

but he doesn´t want to know how you can survive that because the only way that would work if you used forbidden magic or did something really stupid and he can imagine you doing anything, not to survive Solomon´s food alone but it would be in character for you

but he´s glad you didn´t die, would be hard to find a new pillow as good as you are

and he would miss you but the pillow part is the most important one

[snailsgoingdowntown]

Red Stained Relationship

Prologue i

Slight yandere! Blade x fem! Reader

Warnings: Implied past child and domestic abuse, twisted sense of ‘love,’ toxic relationship(s), blood, character death.

Blade didn’t abuse the reader btw. He just sucks at anything that is healthy.

Blog contains dark content/dead dove don’t eat.

You'll see why I added "slight yandere' as the series goes on.

Minors/blank blogs dni.

Word count: 684

===

“To kill something is to love it, and to love something is to kill it.”

It was your parents’ favorite saying; behind the jaded eyes and sloppy love they would give. And, of course, you never understood it. Never wanted to, even as a young child, simply nodding your head away whenever they would tuck you into bed at night, kissing your forehead before repeating these words to each other the moment they closed your door.

While you were curious, you never bothered to understand them. They felt alien. You felt alien, an outsider looking in. You couldn’t return your parents’ love as is – your love language was different. Less violent. Less confusing. And more gentle, as gentle as a child could get.

The foundation of your very family was unsteady at best and broken at worse. Even your brother would agree, comforting you on nights that were just a little too noisy. And you would return the favor, perhaps in a less effective way, but all the same. And the cycle would repeat, some days noisier than the others, a mess to be cleaned up. And on others, it almost felt normal.

Almost.

But now, as the dying man rests his head on your lap, you think you get the gest of their oh so favorite saying.

Even so, you still don’t want to hurt him. His blood was staining your dress, and you feel the warmness of it. His breaths were labored, chest slowly moving up and down. There’s blood running down his face, with stab wounds decorating his entire body. But he doesn’t let out any painful whines, barely lets out a grunt.

His wounds weren’t healing. As gruesome as they could be, the wounds stay open. You could attempt to put pressure on them. Especially the gaping one on his chest. You rake your fingers through his hair instead. A small comfort, and maybe even a small celebration. He was the only one happy about it, though.

“You should rest. Close your eyes and everything will be over.” You’re surprised at how steady your voice is. Like you weren’t breaking apart from the inside, cracking like glass. You feel like crying, but nothing comes out. Not even a sob.

“I… I’ve been waiting for this day,” Blade coughs out, wheezing after it. Shakily, one of his arms raises, knuckles grazing your cheek. His vision must be hazy, for when you move his hair out of his face, his eyes are dazed. Unfocused.

“It must be a good day for you then.”

“It… it is. But – fuck – a horrible one for you.” Another coughing fit, but he doesn’t retreat his hand.

“You shouldn’t talk too much. I know it hurts. So, rest.” Blade doesn’t say anything but struggles to keep his hand in the air. His glove prevents him from feeling your skin. And in his mind, it’s probably better this way. Otherwise, he might have second thoughts.

And it’s too late for that.

“… I know that I shouldn’t love you, and that you were a horrible person. I shouldn’t have gotten involved with you, actually. But even so…,” your eyes start to water the more you take everything in. He’s really going to die.

“Yeah… I was… horrible to you. I… I wanted to treat you… nicely. Gently. But I’m no longer… capable of that.” He wheezes out, taking gulps of air. “I’m surprised you stayed…,” he trails off, death knocking at the door louder than before.

He wishes he treated you better. That the bloodlust he had towards you didn’t exist. Maybe then, you could have been happier. No. he should have left the moment he felt something deeper, addicting developed for you.

You close your eyes before covering his own with your hand. Any more of this and you really might cry. Or call for help, something he wouldn’t want. Should you kill him, or let him die on his own?

Even as horrible as he is, you still loved him. Common sense had long gone away the moment you accepted him as is.

“Goodnight, Yingxing.”

[ossifer-bones]

Kiriona's Teeth, Naberius' Body, and Lyctoral Masking

He undid her scarf, and Nona looked away. Beneath the scarf a huge wound in the throat made the neck yawn wide open. When she peeked back, wishing she had her braids to screen everything, she saw that Palamedes had unbuttoned the shirt partway and there was another big wound in the chest—a big purple bloodless puncture wound, with white teeth peeking out coyly from within.

Kiriona's chest wound appears as a purple and bloodless wound, with teeth. A lot of people think that teeth is just a poetic way of referring to her ribs being visible, but I propose an alternate explanation: the devils, and Hell.

As we see on the Ninth, when they inspect the corpse of one of the possessed:

The eyelids hung slack, and there were rows of dark purple pinpricks above and below them—like something fine and sharp had come through.

The possessed bear purple pinpricks through which the teeth emerge, purple and bloodless wounds.

Naberius' and Gideon's Bodies

Naberius' body in Gideon the Ninth:

Naberius Tern lay awkwardly sprawled on the ground. His expression was that of a man who had suffered the surprise of his life. There was something too white about his eyeballs, but otherwise he looked perfectly real, perfectly alive, perfectly coiffed.

Gideon's body in As Yet Unsent:

The corpse has still failed to rot. The princess says they are leaving it outside in significantly fluctuating temperatures, under observation, and it still fails to rot.

The corpse is still as it ever was. I asked Hect if the scavengers had got at it. She said that animals refused to touch it even when encouraged.

I wonder if they will stop the experiments now. The corpse of the Ninth House cavalier is as pristine as when Camilla Hect convinced them to take it on board.

Both fail to rot. Both bodies appear obviously dead on inspection, yet uncannily pristine. Perfectly coifed, pristine as when first taken on board, remarkably so.

Lyctoral Masking

Ianthe was a black hole to you, a null, an empty, overradiant space, unreadable; but close physical proximity could echolocate that darkness.

Black hole, overradiant, darkness. Dark, light, dark.

“Harrowhark,” he said, “You are a Lyctor. You generate too much light, or too much darkness, for me to look at you and make out any strong detail [...]

Too much light, or too much darkness.

Lyctoral masking means the body is, at once, too light and yet too dark for detail to be made out necromantically, at least from a distance. John says that even he cannot make out strong detail as a result of it. Where else does John say that his power falls short? Hell.

“It is the mouth to Hell [...] Anyone who has entered a stoma has never returned. It is a portal to the place I cannot touch—somewhere I don’t fully comprehend, where my power and my authority are utterly meaningless.”

When else do we see light and darkness associated with necromancy?

Soul Siphoning

The torchlights gave an asthmatic gurk and dimmed as though their batteries were being sucked dry, and when Gideon looked at her hands through bleary eyes they were deepening grey [...] The world grew heavy and black around the edges, and Gideon felt cold all the way to her marrow.

Then Gideon saw the colour begin draining from Colum the Eighth as though he were covered with cheap dye: leaching as shadow leached hue in the nighttime, more horrible and more obvious in the unforgiving light of the electric torches and underfloor lamps. As he faded, the pale Silas incandesced. He glowed with an irradiated shimmer, iridescent white, and the air began to taste of lightning.

“When Master Octakiseron siphons his cavalier, he sends the soul elsewhere and then exploits the space it leaves behind. The power that rushes in to fill that space will keep refilling, for as long as either of them can survive [...]”

“Brother Colum has fought harder and in colder climes,” said Silas calmly. “He has come back to me through stranger ghosts. He has never once let his body become corrupted, and he never shall.”

Soul siphoning, as we can see, relies on sending the soul somewhere else and exploiting the power that rushes to fill in the space it leaves. This place is almost explicitly said to be Hell. As Augustine says to Mercy, founder of the Eighth: “You never did take the stoma seriously, which is why your whole damned House sucks at it like a grotesque teat—”

And, as you can see from the above excerpts, siphoning dims the lights and brings a chill to the room. Where else do we see gloom descend and the temperature drop?

With an awful crack, his head turned one hundred and eighty degrees to look impassively at the room behind him. One of the lightbulbs screamed, exploded, died in a shower of sparks. The air was very cold. Gideon’s breath came as frosty white frills in the sudden darkness, and the remaining lights struggled to pierce the gloom. Colum licked his lips with a grey tongue.

Siphoning taps into the power of Hell. And, as Ianthe says, she suspects the Eighth's contribution to the Lyctoral megatheorem was getting the power flowing.

“And then for the last step you hook up the cables and get the power flowing. You’ll find that one a walk in the park, Eighth, I suspect it was your House’s contribution.”

Conclusions

Soul siphoning relies on displacing the cavalier's soul, to draw power from the resulting space.

The displacement of soul siphoning derives power from Hell, the realm beyond the Stoma, where the devils originate from.

After their deaths, that allow their respective necromancers to ascend to Lyctorhood, Naberius and Gideon's bodies appear to be preserved.

Devils grow teeth from purple, bloodless wounds. The wound on Gideon's body appears purple, bloodless, and has seemingly grown teeth.

Ianthe theorised that the Eighth's contribution to the megatheorem was getting the power flowing, granting them access to the lyctoral well of thanergy.

Lyctoral masking is said by John to be due to the Lyctor generating too much light or darkness, obscuring details from even him. Soul siphoning generates light and darkness. Soul siphoning derives power from the place beyond the Stoma, which John defines as being a place where his power is meaningless.

The Stoma are in the River, where dead souls go after death, and an essential component of imperfect lyctorhood is the death of the cavalier.

[katy-l-wood]

"Everyone" is self-diagnosing on the spectrum, please get tested or don't claim to be on the spectrum. Personally, everyone I know who has self-diagnosed and then been tested has failed the tests and been like "I guess I just had anxiety and stuff".

Basically, dunning kruger syndrome. People who think "Oh, I'm weird, and awkward, and have social anxiety, I must be autistic or on the spectrum."

No, you likely just coincidentally have those traits.

Medical testing will tell you if you have those traits in such a degree that it effects your entire life to the level of autism.

Most people do NOT meet this criteria, and they're just trying to join a group of people and fit in. That's fine, but it's also insulting to those who struggled beyond their understanding.

There's a difference between struggling in school and suffering with everything in school and having an absolute nightmare of which the only emotional response at that age is to cry every night and wish you were dead.

The difference between being socially weird and being so different that there's a target on your back and even the most mild of kids turns into a bully around you because it's so easy.

To need decades of therapy just from how people have treated you, THAT is closer to autism than "I have adhd and I like cats."

I am not saying that is the only kind of autism or only experience, I am using it as an example. There are, of course, those who went under the radar and absolutely have autism in adulthood. But to be aware of the massive and documented problem of self-diagnosis and over-diagnosing autism, is not to gatekeep it.

I'm assuming this is because of my post about my character Conifer?

Look. How about you don't assume shit about when:

A) You don't fucking know me or anything about my life.

And B) That post is about a CHARACTER. A character you also know nothing about because the book isn't even out yet.

The rest of this I'm not going to bother to address. My personal business is not yours. If you disagree with my stance on self-diagnosis (which, for the record, is 100% in favor), the unfollow and block buttons are right there.

I'm sorry you went through such a horrible experience with being autistic. That truly, truly sucks. But you do not get to lash out at strangers on the internet just because their experiences don't perfectly mesh with yours.

[damianbugs]

please share your dick and bruce fic recs, both sad and fun stuff

–someone who thinks about them a normal amount

OHHH my friend my dearest friend i will totally share the best most crazy brainworm inducing bruce and dick fics i have ever read. i wish i was exaggerating when i say this dynamic changed me as a person, but it is the truth i fear. THE troubled father and son blueprint.

DICK AND BRUCE FIC RECS ON AO3

a pointless resistance by emavee

It starts with a news report running in the background of a greasy little diner, but it ends with Dick dead. Except, it doesn't stop there. It keeps on ending, over and over. Bruce's son keeps dying, and nothing he does seems to make any sort of difference.

MY NOTES: whenever i stumble upon an emotionally repressed individual i imagine a little cartoon person in my head shouting SEND HIM TO THE TIME LOOP because it truly does fix all problems. wonderful bruce and dick writing and the dialogue was so real to me i have tears in my eyes just thinking about it. it is also set during the robin jason era!

Making Time by CaptainOzone

Bruce does not remember anything leading up to this moment. He does not remember teaming up with Superman recently, nor does he remember being anywhere but Gotham proper. He does remember having Robin at his side. Robin, it turns out, is not there any longer. God does he hate magic.

MY NOTES: you'll notice a common theme with these recs and that is bruce needs to be having a horrible time and then is forced to confront his emotions and express them accordingly to dick. there is something very bittersweet about this yet it was handled so wonderfully. again, tears in my eyes.

Catch and Release by snackbaskets

There's a tradition among the family: when in danger, you grab the smallest Robin and hang on tight. But like all traditions, this one had to start somewhere, right? Alternately: three times Dick bodily attacks his father (with love)

MY NOTES: ohhh i think about the last part of this fic like all the time. something so sweet and precious about it to me. such a fun and comforting read.

Afraid of the Dark by WrongLeverKronk

The wind whispered outside his window and the dim moon failed to provide comfort. He was embarrassed. Richard Grayson sat on his bed, above the covers, with his arms wrapped firmly around his knees that were tucked against his chest. He thought everything would be fine when he parted from his friends for the evening, that his confidence would follow him in solitary. He regretted parting as soon as he turned out the lights in his bedroom and became enclosed by the eerie atmosphere. (Or: the aftermath of the episode in which Robin hallucinates Slade. He calls Batman)

MY NOTES: can u hear the sounds of me screaming crying sobbing. one of my first ever dick and bruce fics. fun fact i have never watched teen titans but watched this episode specifically just for fun and then read this and now it is seared permanently into my mind forever. anyways read this.

in the dark of the night by fanfictiongreenirises

“I already have a dad, y’know? So you don’t have to be my new dad. I don’t really want you to be my dad, anyway. We can be friends. Partners.” Bruce seems to sigh in relief, having stiffened up halfway through Dick’s speech. “Friends and partners, then.” And they were in agreement. Bruce and Dick and a series of steps and leaps and jumps.

MY NOTES: sometimes im okay and then i remember how many times dc COULD have made bruce adopt dick and DIDNT because they SUCK and so this fic is here to warm the hearts of all those who need it. so lovely.

After the Wake by nighhtwing (divineauthor)

Fathers should not bury their children. —•— When Jason dies, Dick comes home, and Bruce muses on being a parent.

MY NOTES: a shorter one, but man does it pack a real punch to the heart. i find bruce and dicks dynamic immediately after jasons death the most fascinating and this was a wonderful spin on it!

You Are My Reflection (As I Am Yours) by Fairy527

A rope snaps. A collective scream echoes in the tent. (A threatening low voice. A sinister metallic click.) The Flying Graysons fall, and Bruce is sent back to that fateful night in Crime Alley

MY NOTES: clutches my heart screaming OHH. OH THE PARALLELS. there is just something so personal about the night the graysons fell and the night the waynes died being referenced with one another AND THIS GOT IT SOOO WELL. tears. tears forever.

i can't promise (it's not written in the stars) by konan_konan

Batman is following him, surely, but he’s smaller and faster and he’s not going to let someone take him and lock him up again. Wayne Manor, he’s learned, is just another kind of prison. It may be big and fancy but it is also empty and cold and he’s not going back. Tony Zucco dies tonight, he tells himself. It is the only thing that matters. or: dick loses two soulmates, and gains three.

MY NOTES: oh this fic. i need a moment. soulmate aus can be a real hit or miss sometimes but the way it was portrayed in this literally surpasses all expectation it was just SO GOOD. the dick introspection is honestly one of my favourites like. ever.

In This or Any Other Universe by wildsofmarch

There was a new vigilante in his city: a man who smiled too much and talked too loud and knew his way around a fight a little too well. Bruce wasn't bothered by his antics. Except the man also seemed to know a little too much about him. Who was this Nightwing, anyway? ------ OR: Dick Grayson (DCU) accidentally lands himself in Battinson’s Gotham.

MY NOTES: here it is. my favourite bruce and dick fic of all time forever and ever. im so serious. the tears are not in my eyes because they are streaming down my face. the idea of battinson with a robin was lovely and now that this gives us battinson with NIGHTWING i am just inconsolable. MUST READ.

[klausysworld]

Could you write something with yandere klaus and he’s kidnapped the reader but she’s slowly becoming a yandere over him and refusing to let him have attention on anyone but her or to leave her alone?

I think…I love you

It started of like a nightmare. I was trapped and i hated him, i wished him dead or locked away like he had me.

I felt like a caged animal, i am caged animal…or i was?

It’s gotten confusing over the months. The more he spent time with me, the less i seemed to mind. To begin with i would yell and rile him up and he would lash back, be cruel and rough but once i gave in and stopped kicking or hitting and screaming, he wasn’t so bad.

The food he gave me was of the best quality and there was no shortage of snacks in the cupboards he had put up in my room.

Over time my room went from just a bed to a full on apartment. There was a kitchen section with a stove that only he could turn on, after the small incident that i caused when he originally installed it and tried to burn the room down, and then a microwave, sink and fridge freezer

“Now we can cook and bake together, my love, no more waiting for me to disappear and remerge with the food, you have your own” he said with a smile as he opened the cupboards filled with crisps and chocolates and such.

That was a moment I wouldn’t ever forget, I practically threw myself at him hugging him so unbelievably tight he could barely breathe. After a minute of shock he hugged me back before we baked dozens of cookies and cakes.

Next was the TV. That was a game changer.

Again i had jumped on him so suddenly he fell back onto the sofa he had bought with me on top of him. His eyes were wide as i slammed my lips to his, he moaned in surprise as my tongue met his in a frenzy. His hands were in my hair as he managed to get himself above me, my legs wrapping round his waist much to his surprise.

Now we didn’t go all the way but he was overly happy to have his fingers inside me. He seemed to be in more pleasure than i was-if that was possible- as he continued to groan into my mouth and curl his fingers against my spongey spot to have my chest pushing to his and my mouth opening wider for him. And when my head was thrown back while i cried his name and came all over his hand, he was sucking dark marks into my neck with a growl of satisfaction.

We had become much closer since then. I found myself drawn to his talented hands, aching to have them back on me, in me. And he was all the more happy to oblige. I knew once we had sex i would’ve finally given in completely, there would be zero chance of ever leaving my room. But that didn’t mean I couldn’t let him have me in other ways.

Now he was allowed to touch me he was all the more eager to get me whatever i wanted. He was like a gift from hell. He could be so horrible, demanding and selfish but then he would be kind, loving and giving. And I couldn’t help but want him around. I didn’t try to escape anymore, there wasn’t any point. I was…happy here, with him. There wasn’t anyone left for me in the real world, he had made sure of that ages ago so he was all i really had and i he had everything i needed so why run away?

There was one small problem though. He was often leaving, never able to stay too long because of another problem in town, his family, Salvatores, everything.

At times i even had to beg him to stay, anything for another ten minutes. It was horrible being in here alone, it felt empty and lifeless. Besides he enjoyed my pleading and grasping for him to stay, almost guaranteed me extra time with him.

I began to grow upset when he mentioned other women. One name in particular: Caroline Forbes. Someone who had very clearly taken an interest i him and yet he seemed oblivious

“She likes you” i stated and he laughed

“No she’s using me, she thinks she has me in her pocket but it is i who is winning this game” he muttered. A game? With a girl? Not good.

The annoyance in his voice was clear when he spoke of Elena and Bonnie, though sometimes he was a little too impressed by Bonnie’s power which always twisted something inside me. He liked me to be weak, enjoyed the hold he had over me so why was he so enamoured by hers?

Something when he didn’t come down to sleep beside me, my mind began to wonder. Was he in someone else’s bed? Were there other girls with their own room somewhere else i this place? Did he love me at all? I was well behaved now, obedient. Surely he wasn’t still mad at me for our earlier interactions?

That fear drove me. It had me clinging to him relentlessly, I needed him to stay with me like i would him. He had to be mine if i were to be his.

———————————————————————

I waited patiently as i heard his footsteps nearing. The door unlocking before he walked in dressed impeccably. His suit was tailored perfectly and his hair was gelled. His bowtie was white like his shirt with his blazer, pants and shoes were black.

“My love” he breathed as he pulled me into his arms. I hugged him lightly before pulling away with a frown

“Why are you dressed up?” I asked and his lips twitched into a smile

“It’s my mother, she has returned, she’s throwing a ball and so my siblings and i had to attend, bring dates and all that” he waved his hand dismissively before pressing his lips to mine but i pushed him away making him frown

“Dates?” I questioned, that sick feeling rising throughout me as i glared at the thought

“It’s only Caroline love, i had to otherwise it would be suspicious. I can’t have anyone suspecting you down here” he explained softly but his faux innocence only caused my fear and anger to rise

“How on earth is that fair? You have me! You don’t need her!? Am i- am i not enough? Oh god you’re going to take her too aren’t you?” My emotions were running a thousand miles a second as i backed away from him

“No, love no, of course not. You’re more than enough, i love you. It’s just an act sweetheart, i don’t mean anything by it. I’m not keeping anyone else like i have you, you’re all i will ever need, ever want” he assured but my head shook as my heart began to race, my breaths coming closer together

“You’re lying- you keep giving me things to distract me don’t you? Because you’re with other people… is- is this because I won’t sleep with you? You need someone else to-“

“No! No that is not what is happening at all!” He yelled, his eyes wide and his hands coming down to my shoulders but the contact made it worse. How many people were being touched by his hands? Fingers that had been all over me, in someone else?

“Y/n look at me, look at me bunny” he pleaded quietly, my eyes reluctantly rose to his as i felt tears cloud my vision. His thumbs were quick to wipe any away as he held my face gently

“I would never, and will never, do that to you. You have no idea how much i love you sweetheart. I watched you for weeks, months before coming to take you home, i know you my love. You’re mine, and i am yours, completely and utterly yours. I would do anything to prove that to you” he confessed as i saw his eyes glisten over as worry seeped in

“Then why do you leave me for her?” Her i whispered, my voice breaking as I attempted to withhold the sobs that were clawing at the back of my throat.

“To protect you” he murmured “that is all, you must believe me, i wouldn’t have done all of this just to throw you away, i love you more than could ever love anybody else, you mean an impossible amount to me”

“Why can’t we just be together Klaus? Why cant we have our own house and we can be together” i asked quietly now the tears ran down my face

“It isn’t safe for you to be outside” he explained

“Then I won’t leave. I’ll stay in the house, you can spell it, we can stay inside, together, isn’t that what you want? Just us..forever?”

He smiled sadly at me as he pressed a kiss to my forehead

“I’m afraid that just isn’t possible in my life, my family will always find me, my enemies will always find me, this. This is the only way to keep you safe and with me. I wish there were another way, and there is in a different world but not this one love, this is the only way” he whispered desperately trying to have me believe him

“Please don’t go to the ball with her” i uttered

“No love, I won’t” he promised pulling me into a hug and hiding his face in my neck, kissing tenderly. “I’ll just stay here, my family won’t notice just this once” he muttered as his lips moved down to my collarbone, sucking gently

“I think…I love you” i told him so quietly i was surprised even his supernatural side could hear me.

But i knew he had when his face hovered just over mine, his eyes shining as he smiled down at me

“And i love you, more than you could believe” he reminded

“I want to be yours, fully” I muttered bringing his hand to rest over my heart. “Please, i know you want to”

His eyes darkened as i moved his hand to squeeze my breast

“Not like this” he murmured “you’re vulnerable and upset, we will soon, I promise… but under far more romantic circumstances” he kissed the corner of my mouth before bringing me over to my bed, sitting me down in the middle “But if you lay back, i can still certainly help you feel better” he purred as he emerged from between my legs, his hands pushing my knees apart making me laugh lightly

“You know you’ve done the pleasing an awful lot over the past months, perhaps i can help you this time?” I offered, my hand reaching down to feel his crotch, my brows widening feeling him already hard and much larger than I expected. I could see his smirk as his hips gently rocked against my hand

“If you come here we can please each other” he grinned and my face grew hot

“I love you” i told him leaning up to kiss him

“And i, you”

[colourprinter]

Probably too personal thoughts, feelings, and ramblings around Our Wonderland

A couple of warnings, this will likely spoil all of Our Wonderland and this will likely get personal on the thoughts and feelings. It's a personal look (and total ramble) at this game more than anything.

If you haven't played or don't know what Our Wonderland is, I don't know how you found this but you can find it for free on this link.

To keep the spoilers hidden and to prevent forcing , I've put everything in the expand below.

I found this game from the Queer Halloween Story Bundle on itch, I was looking around what was in the bundle and enountered this game. I had already played a visual novel from the bundle that didn't gel too well with me so my hopes weren't too high.

I had no idea what this free game in a bundle had in store.

I was casual during the intro, I don't know when it hit but I knew I was locked in when act 2 hit and I saw what the meat of this game really is.

Something in this game sucked me right in, and wouldn't let me go.

I can't say I remember every detail but I was quickly emotionally invested, trying (and almost always failing) to keep Iggy alive and seeing how this friend group had completely gone off the rails, how their wishes twist around them.

Everything gave me the feeling I believe it was meant to, Gidget's advances on Iggy, Orlam, Buck's outright brutality, Genzou trying to get out alive while throwing the worst words at Orlam (I think he's just like that anyway) and Iggy having the worst time of his life.

While that doesn't sound like much, I don't usually get a reaction from a lot, the mix of visual and words hits just right... or wrong given how horrifying some of this is. Well, some things in the game would easily get a reaction...

For a bit of context for the next parts, I am aro/ace, something I truely discovered myself in the middle of a relationship, not that I hate being in a relationship but I think I'm completely incapable of feeling romantic love, there's just... nothing there. With being ace, I kinda resented the way my brain would react, litrally wishing sometimes that I was ace, glad I grew out of that for my own sake.

I also tend to feel awkward enough around sex in video games. I got goaded into the House of Hope scene, the first time the game crashed to save me and the second time I went dead slient and fixed my eyes down, only looking up enough to see the choices... I've now got an agreement to never have that happen again.

So obviously Gitget's sections got a big reaction from me, I thankfully haven't had any expriences close to anything like that, I could understand Iggy's perspective.

But enough about the horrible stuff for the moment, I'm not going to explain that, yes, seeing Orlam's and Buck's scenes were also shockers because eating human flesh and brutally murdering people are kinda bad things as well.

What I want to focus on next is something I currently only have one full perspective of, the romance. I usually verbalise everything to myself in RPGs and VNs, doing silly little voices for everyone (doing 6 children voices at the end hurt) so when I was given the choice of an ending... obviously, I chose the Genzou ending. Usually I'd feel awkward and stilted reading out the words but this time, it felt nice, I haven't done the other endings but I'm sure they're just as good, even if they're not, I got at least one good romance which given that this topples my fav VN romance (Slay the Princess which is pratically a joke romance anyway), I'm more than happy with it.

Niceness is over, I have another list topper, worst thing I've ever encountered in a video game, something so bad that even being foribly censored (I'm not checking if there's a visible version this time), it made me sick to my stomach. The tree and the infant in Her branches. Now I've played though and done some horrible things in video games, including child murder, but the way the body is described, the way everyone reacts to it. I can't call it anything below truely horrible and I'm putting this above freaking turn based RPG murdering children, I thought after that nothing would get me again (I think doing it actually knocked a screw loose because I've suddenly stopped being a goodie two shoes in video games, that's how bad that was). I mean this as a compliment but that is the worst thing I have ever encountered in any media.

And I think because I've felt these strong emotions where I haven't been hit so hard before, I've become completely pulled into it all. The fanwork contest was the first bit of my own art I put online in years and that kick started me getting back into art as a hobby, something I don't think I would have gotten back into if I didn't do that bit of Iggy art to prove to myself that I could do it if I put myself into it.

So... Carrot, thank you so much for this game of romance, fun, death and wishes.

If I land on my feet, I'd like to make a game with multiple acespec PoVs one day, much less horror though.

[writingforfun0714]

So I wanted to wait and let the new Bad Batch trailer sink in before posting about it.

Warnings: Spoilers, some thoughts/opinions will be critical

Alright so I don’t think it’s any secret that I don’t care for the Bad Batch. Even ignoring the horrible, incredibly RACIST clone model, the writing is mid/passable at best and not even watchable for me. Most of S1 and 2 combined is the typical ‘mission of the week’ type of story where only a few Empire-focused episodes stand out. There are also instances of ableism concerning Echo in particular (CF99 are also super dismissive of him in general—going along with that whole fucking ‘superiority over regs’ thing—seriously wtf).

Most episodes were very bland and predictable. S1 had no stakes despite its finale. By Mando/ST it’s clear that something has happened to Kamino. Didn’t really need to see a 2pt ep of the city getting wiped. Plus AZI should’ve been sacrificed. Even Ahsoka learns the lesson that you can’t save everyone in S1 when she disobeys Anakin and Admiral Yularen. TBB S2 had no character development from anyone besides a little bit for Omega (and Tech—but that was always speculated by fans since S1 and he’s dead now so it doesn’t really matter). A lot of the dialogue felt…basic. I think the only thing that TBB does well is the music. It’s really amazing and beautiful along with the smooth, crisp animation/scenery. Shame they ruined it with racist clone models, racist tones with the ‘reg’ dispute in both seasons, and being ableist and dismissive towards Echo.

Which brings me to the trailer. Oh boy. First, right off the bat I noticed how similar the trailer opening is compared to the S2 trailer. I do like that Phee is back. She did take time to grow on me but I do like her character and am curious to see where they will go with her.

It’s interesting we are seeing Crosshair back with the group so soon. Personally I do believe that is Crosshair and not just someone else wearing his armor like some think. I like the idea of Omega and Crosshair escaping early on but Omega gets recaptured/separated and taken back to Tantiss.

I’m interested in Hemlock and his backstory (is his gloved hand robotic?). I wish they’d create more interesting and unique characters like Phee and Fennec Shand instead of relying on cameos of established characters/fan-favorites like Ventress. I loved Dark Disciple and I thought it was a great ending for her.

I know it’s officially said that Ventress’ story will follow Dark Disciple but I don’t see how unless they retcon her death or pull a ‘somehow she survived’. Either way that sucks. Reminder!! DAVE FELONY DIDN’T EVEN FOLLOW REBELS FOR AHSOKA. SABINE IS NOT FORCE SENSITIVE IN REBELS. DAVE RETCONS THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYTHING. I have no faith that they will remain loyal to DD. Anything that will be ‘canon’ will be mid at best because even Crosshair’s arc has been messy (which is due to the weird S1 ‘reset’ the characters go through. Like they totally should’ve appreciated ‘regs’ by the end of TBB arc in TCW S7–there was no need for that awkward food fight scene in S1).

I hate that this show has to rely on cameos to get the viewing numbers. Here is a list of every character cameo we’ve seen so far:

—Rex*

—Tarkin*

—Palpatine*

—The Lawquane Family

—The Syndullas/Chopper

—Nala Se/Lama Su*

—Cad Bane

—Bail Organa

—Riyo Chuchi

—Gungi

—Gregor

—Wolffe

—Cody

—Scorch

—Saw Gerrera

—Martez Sisters

—Kanan/Depa*

—Muchi/Rancor from RotJ

—Taun We/Halle Burtoni

—Ventress

*I consider these important/relevant cameos and am not bothered by them like the others*

What a list right? I might even be missing one. These were just off the top of my head. Some are big players, others smaller and almost not-relevant to the plot. Not counting the one’s I asterisked, it’s 15 characters. There are original characters but a lot of them, especially in S1 felt like one off, not important characters. And I hate Cid so much—glad to see she was absent in the S3 trailer. I’m really starting to love Phee and I’ve always loved Fennec Shand, and Hemlock is definitely an intriguing villain and Emerie feels like a total mystery (though the reveal was not shocking due to the similar design and accent to Omega). Like why can’t they create more characters like these? The rest just feel forgettable. And it’s clear that characters like Saw, Gungi, Scorch, Cad Bane and even the Syndulla and Lawquane families just felt like fan service. The rest kind of make sense that they’d show up but it also feels a bit like fan service.

Moving on..

I know a lot of people think that new weird dark trooper at the 1:40 mark is Tech. While I’m inclined to agree as I think the ‘Winter Soldier’ story is an obvious choice to pick, I also think that Tech is dead. I’ve changed my mind and kind of hope that Tech isn’t brought back.

I hope this is someone new. I also wouldn’t mind if it was a bounty hunter we’ve seen before. Due to the frame and stature, I could almost think of Boba due to him being older than Omega but it’s definitely more likely to be Tech than either of these choices.

It’s interesting a lot of cameo characters from S2 do not make an appearance in the trailer. Bail, Riyo, Gungi, Gregor and Cody are all absent from the trailer. Trailers usually show action shots to avoid story spoilers, but with Gungi, Gregor, and Cody all being capable fighters, I’m surprised they didn’t appear (usually stuff with politics is a story spoiler).

Overall I’m skeptical of the trailer. I don’t like Ventress being alive/in TBB being a Dark Disciple lover. There’s a lot of mystery surrounding the story of S3 so I don’t feel like I can give an accurate take on that. I hate how Omega’s longer hair looks. Curly haired Omega is adorable!! The animation (everything but the clone model) is definitely getting better. However, based on how S2 was marketed as a ‘darker story compared to S1’ and was like 80% fetch quest I’m definitely skeptical.

Those of you that made it through this post, thank you for your time and I hope I gave you something to think about. If you wanna learn more about the racism and ableism portrayed in this show, check out @unwhitewashthebadbatch for more info.

[expecto-kedavra]

Hi i love your MC's man bun lolol

but i was wondering if i could request a male mc ravenclaw piece where he is trying to work through trauma caused from ranrok? also could you use me/i perspective cause i've never seen that written for HL on here

the longer the better!

First off, thank you! Second, this was a great first ask as I myself am a male Ravenclaw/Slytherin who has dealt with trauma ✌️I HOPE ITS NOT TOO LONG 😂

RAVENCLAW M!MC DEALING WITH THE AFTER EFFECTS OF RANROK

!Warning! - insomnia, nightmares, grieving over death, loved ones dying, PTSD.

4,257. That's how many stars were on my Ravenclaw dormitory ceiling. I had long memorized the constellations before all of this, and I quite wished I hadn't. It would be another wonderful way to pass the time. I sat up on my bunk, and let out a large, dramatic exhale. I looked down at Amit, and chuckled as I saw him drooling into his pillow. It was a wonder that he was able to sleep with the dragon that was Everett snoring in the bunk on the other side of the room. I always managed before, but not now. Not anymore. I usually don't dream, and if I did it was something ridiculous like Sebastian turning into a Runespoor. It started the night of Ranrok. The night he attacked Hogwarts. The night Professor Fig...left.

It had been six months since the events underneath the school. Six months since the nightmares began. The first time it happened, I thought I was awake. I was in Hogsmeade, but it was...different. There was a low fog covering everything. From out of it walked Victor Rookwood. "Impossible. You're dead!" I screamed at him. He let out a low, cruel chuckle. "Arrogant child. Thinking death is the end." He grabbed my shoulder and we disappeared into a writhing black mess of flames. I dropped onto the floor of the Final Repository, right in front of the demonic dragon that was Ranrok. I barely could stand before I was incinerated by a massive black wave of heat, death and pain. Then I woke up. They all started like this, for the first week or so. Then they got worse. I could handle those ones. I couldn't handle the ones that came after. The ones with my friends. At first it was Professor Fig, and I had hope. I thought he would save me, just as he had so many times before. I was foolish to think that. Ranrok eviscerated him. I was left to grieve again, crying over his body as the ghostly forms of Rookwood and Ranrok cackled over me, telling me how I will always fail. Of course it got worse after that. It was no longer Fig, but my friends. Sebastian, Ominis, Amit, Poppy, Samantha...all dying horrible and painful deaths, while the ghosts of my enemies laughed at my failure to protect them. It was easier to just stay awake. Brewed several wakefullness potions in the room every day, so it wasn't hard to keep myself up. It was dreadfully boring though.

Eventually the morning caught up with my thoughts and it was luckily time to head to class. Classes were easy. Like Fig always said, I had an affinity for magic, which meant I seemed to absorb everything and didn't have much struggle with anything. Unfortunately, I seemed to always drift off into my own thoughts, which would always lead me back to Fig. How he gave his all, literally to his death, to help me seal the repository. I hadn't been down there since. As soon I decided to pay a visit tonight, Professor Hecat called on me. "And MC, could you tell us the difference between a Lethifold and a Dementor?" She looked at me with that knowing look she always had, like she was fully aware of everything I was thinking. "A Lethifold is classified as a Beast, and eats its victims, whereas a Dementor is a non-being and sucks out the soul of its prey." I effortlessly answered. "Correct, and how do we repel them both should they cross our path?" She knew that I knew this. Why did she ask? "A patronus charm." I'd never cast a patronus before. Quite frankly I'm unsure if I'd be able to. "Correct again. Points to Ravenclaw." she beamed. "We must remember that happiness is subjective, and often finds itself accompanied by other emotions, even sadness." Again she looked deeply at me, almost studying my very thoughts. "That is all for today, class dismissed!" I couldn't help but feel her piercing eyes follow me out of class.

"MC!" I heard from behind me. It was Samantha Dale, one of my closest friends. "Hey, Sammy. How are you?' I asked. "Doing well, thank you. I was wondering if you'd join me in the gardens? I'd like to ask you something about..uh...nature." she seemed to stumble over the last mouthful. "Oh, sure. I'd think you wouldn't need any assistance in that area, you're an expert." Something seemed a bit out of place, but I didn't press for more. Turns out she needed help identifying a beehive, and if Glumbumbles had infested it. They hadn't. Once we had concluded, I turned to head out of the gardens and on to Charms. I was called back by Samantha. "You are stronger than you know." she said. That was what Fig said before I summoned everything within me to seal the repository. Why did she say that? I abruptly turned, confused. "Thank you." I managed to get out. The thought barraged my brain...why did she say that?

The rest of the day was uneventful. I visited Hogsmeade with Natty, and helped Poppy with some Kneazle trouble. Darkness fell, and after I was certain everyone was asleep, I headed down to the Map Chamber with the assistance of a disillusionment charm. When I reached the large sleeping dragon statue, I was startled to see someone there. Professor Hecat. "Welcome." she said. I removed my charm. No doubt her years as an Unspeakable had fine tuned her senses. It was useless to try and pass. "Lovely night, isn't it?" she said, rather gently. "If one can avoid Peeves and his flaming pins, I'd say so." I replied. She laughed. "Yes, well I suspect you have something and someone to attend to. I'll leave you to it." This lady will always astound and confuse me. "I suppose so, Professor." I responded, trying to keep the confusion out of my voice. Who was she talking about? The portraits? She was there for the battle of the repository, so I knew that she had met the Keepers. I picked my brain as to any other hidden meanings she may have been trying to allude to as I made my way down the spiraling stone stairs. I decided she must have meant the Keepers and they must have some new knowledge or task for me. I was wrong.

Once I entered the Map Chamber, I was greeted by four very empty portraits. "Strange." I muttered to myself. I pushed Professor Hecat's cryptic words to the back of my head and meandered down to the repository. Sealed, blue and glowing, as it should be. I could feel the power emanating from it. So much pain. literally, went into it. So much loss...and luckily, so much more prevented. I shuddered at the thought of Ranrok gaining that power. It would be my nightmares come to life. Right as I sat in front of it, a warm, familiar voice rang through the cold air.

"Shouldn't you be in bed?" I turned with a start, wand drawn. Once I saw who was speaking to me, it clattered to the floor. "Professor Fig?" I croaked. His pale ghostly form stood just a few feet in front of me. Well, hovered, not stood. "Yes, my young friend." I apologize I didn't present myself to you sooner, but I wanted to speak to you here. I enlisted the help of some friends to get you here." His voice was just as comforting as I remembered. Suddenly, Samantha and Professor Hecat's words all made sense. "I'm sorry, Professor." I tried to force down the lump in my throat. "I'm sorry I couldn't save you." I fell to the ground, and six months of emotions poured out of my eyes. I felt him kneel beside me. Even as a ghost, he felt warm. "Do not burden yourself with this shame my friend. It is not your fault." His tone was reassuring. "But if I did more, if I tried harder.." I choked through sobs. "Maybe you'd still be here." I looked at him, and saw him smile. "My dear, young friend. You are stronger than you know. You saved so many souls. Do you know why some of us become ghosts?" He mused. I gathered myself. "Yes, when we have unfinished things that our souls cling to after death. Like that poor chap who has to run away from his wife, the one with the ax." I couldn't help but chuckle. "Precisely, and do you know why it is that I am here before you?" He asked, in that very professor-ly tone. "I can't say I do sir." He responded before I could even get the words out. "You, my dear MC." he said lovingly. "Me?" I sniffed. "Yes." he chuckled. "I never told you how much you meant to me. I had may students over many years. None like you." "What none of them could wield an ancient and powerful magic?" I joked. "Of course not, but that's not what I mean. You were more than just a student to me. You were my friend, and my adventure companion. You constantly were impressing me, not only with your magical abilities, but your kindness, cleverness, and incredible sense of love for the world." He stopped abruptly, as though he was swallowing his own lump in his throat. "Miriam's death left me devastated and alone. This pain I shoved deep down, but it still seemed to leave me a tad bitter. Once you came along, however, I found myself laughing and smiling once again. Miriam truly would have loved you, my friend. As I did." I looked at his face, and saw tears streaming down his cheeks. "If I may, you were a son to me. And I am beyond proud of you. You will change the world." As soon as he ended his sentence, a brilliant yellow light filled the room. I shielded my eyes, and saw a figure emerging out of the brilliant golden aura. A short, older witch with a straw hat and half-moon glasses. She had an infectious smile and the kindest eyes I'd ever seen. Miriam. I saw Professor Fig rise to meet her, and take her hand. "I have said what I needed to say. Good luck, my young, capable friend." with that, he turned and entered the light, hand in hand with his beloved. "Now I shall rest." The light faded. I laughed to myself, and wiped the dried tears from my cheeks. "Yeah, me too Professor." and rest I did. The best sleep I'd had in a very long time.

[surplus-of-sarcasm]

Number Twenty-Six

TW: Broken bone, blood, knife, general angst, violence, wounds, me not editing

Rain pattered against windows covered in months, maybe even years worth of accumulated dust, leaving dirty tracks streaming down glass, obscuring the hero's vision. The flickering, half-dead light bulb hanging from the ceiling wasn't much help either, but they didn't have any better options.

Still, it bothered the crime-fighter that they couldn't see everything properly, that no matter how hard they focused, they were still at the mercy of whatever could be lurking in the dark shadows. It meant they were vulnerable, and in their line of work, that idea went hand in hand with a horribly violent death.

They sucked in another careful, measured breath, ignoring their racing heartbeat, the tightness in their chest and the gash across their leg, blood slowly snaking across the torn, battered skin, staining their makeshift bandage, a scrap of an old towel they'd found here a dark crimson. It was what they had trained themselves for; to act like pain, anxiety, anything that could be an obstacle to the ruthless efficiency they were expected to exhibit was nonexistent.

There was no shattering of glass, no creaking of doors or anything of the sort, just a soft ruffle of fabric that one would never be able to discern from another eerie noise produced by the flimsy windows flapping back and forth in the wind, except if they were the hero, senses turned up to a hundred. Their grip tightened on the throwing knives in each hand, contracting and relaxing their muscles rhythmically to steady their nerves. A rush of adrenaline was simply a reflexive function of the body. That was all it was. All they told themselves and wished to believe.

"You know you only heard me because I wanted you to," a lazy, taunting voice drawled. That invoked a completely different emotion in the hero, but the only change to their appearance was a slight clenching of their already tight jaw, and an almost imperceptible tension of their muscles.

Villain scoffed, still concealed somewhere in the shadows, but their tone clearly showed they weren't interested in hiding. "Still quiet? I mean, I admit I wanted to give you a good scare, but you're already terrified into silence this fast? Shame."

The hero could feel the villain's warm breath against their skin in phantom sensations that were all too familiar and yet still horribly foreign. They couldn't see them, thanks to the criminal's powers. They didn't just make them invisible; they helped the criminal move without any sound, without disturbing anything they touched even if they ran straight into it, provided they were still using their power.

Hero's own ability paled in comparison; telekinesis, except they could only move things they saw, so their usual tactic of using an opponents limbs against them was useless against their adversary, who could just bloody disappear if they wanted to.

The villain finally showed themselves, grinning from ear to ear with nothing behind those wicked, emerald eyes. They weren't even wearing a mask, too vain and too proud to care, yet again, their abilities were their mask. And they'd told the hero before that they were one of the few people who knew what they looked like, an awfully intimate piece of information they'd simply said in that distant manner of theirs.

But the hero was not here to dwell on the villain's sentiment; they were here to stop a threat, to seize a target and bring them to justice. So, they maneuvered their body into a fighting stance, readying their knives for throwing, as they would have with any other enemy.

Hero pounced on their target, tackling them to the ground, but Villain disappeared from right underneath their body, letting their form crash into the ground, flimsy, wooden floorboards smashing in the process.

Cursing and lifting themselves upwards, the hero whipped around, listening for any noise the villain would allow them to hear because when it came to the hero, they liked to "Play with my food before I eat it, darling," they'd crooned, another dark, hollow smile across their face.

Soon enough, they felt strong arms bracketing around them, one of which slithered up their figure till cruel fingers wrapped around their neck, slowly increasing pressure on their trachea till the hero's breathing constricted, coughing and wheezing and flailing in the villain's grasp.

In their quest to humiliate the crime-fighter as much as possible, the villain hadn't been able to keep up their power for too long while still touching the hero, reappearing again. Their nemesis wasted no time in seizing the chance, breaking one of the villain's arms with their telekinesis with a resounding crack.

Only for the bastard to laugh in their face. "After all this, you're still going soft on me?" they mocked, absolute scorn dripping from their tone.

"I just don't want to waste all my energy," the hero shot back, trying their hardest to convince themselves more than they were the villain.

Hero's face was outwardly calm, no quirk of the lips or creases on the forehead, their gaze just as empty as the villain's. But the slight clenching of the jaw, the way their hands tightened subtly on the blades; all these small, inconspicuous signs of the hero's tension didn't go unnoticed by the villain.

"Your little, brave face is so cute it almost makes me feel bad for wanting to end you," Villain purred, dissappearing just shy away from the hero's blade, the steel cutting a perfect straight-line through the fabric of their expensive shirt.

Hero's blood boiled, all pretences of indifference dissappearing from their face as they let out a nearly inhuman snarl, as several of the capillaries in their nose burst as a result of all the increasing pressure, a streak of red running down their visage. They were so goddamn sick of the villain and their exhuasting mind games.

They got the idea of using their power to throw obstacles in haphazard parts of the room. If the villain was forced to waste their energy on objects they tried to go through, especially when injured, the hero would finally be able to end this.

Finally, their nemesis had reappeared, leaning against a wall, their arm twisted in a horribly grotesque angle, and for the first time since the beginning of this ridiculous fight, the villain actually looked tired, shoulders slumping, having depleted almost all of their energy. Still, something defiant burned in their eyes, the intention to destroy written all over their features.

Unfortunately for them, though, the hero was at their heels, kicking them backwards so that they were flush against the wall, the crime-fighter’s good leg preventing them from escaping. "You know I'll just disappear again, but you really like torturing yourself with this, don't you, doll?"

Every pet name, every time the villain touched them, whether deliberate or accidental, felt like poison was being forced down their throat, spreading into their system like a wound that only continued to fester and grow.

They stabbed their blade somewhere near the villain's collarbone, ripping through skin, a dark carmine pooling around it as the muscle fibres were torn through, making their enemy howl out in pain. Some part of them wished to twist the metal stuck in their nemesis's body, just to test how much they could make them scream.

But that dark fragment of them that resided in a soulless corner of their mind quickly had its voice muffled as déja-vu washed over them in a nauseating wave.

The villain sank to the ground, a lost, faraway look in their eyes, full of an emotion the hero couldn't discern. "It wasn't personal," they said softly, "but this is personal, isn't it?"

Two weeks ago, the hero had gotten daring, a little cocky even. They'd pinned the villain against the wall with their leg, their warm breath like a summer breeze, caressing their enemy's skin, as their hands toyed with the fabric of another one of the villain's elegant tops. They pulled them closer, ready to whisper those three heavy words as they pressed a kiss to the villain's cheekbone, the hero's skin feeling like it was on fire with the passion.

Except the villain had twisted a knife into their abdomen before the hero's lips had even touched their skin, walking off like nothing had happened, their eyes hollow again, as though the hero was a fool, and this was all so obvious.

"It's never personal with you," the hero choked out, eyes red-rimmed and glassy, the treacherous wound on their leg reopening completely as they fell down.

Villain's eyes still held that unfocused look. "It wasn't at first," they clarified, sucking in a sharp breath and wincing as it disturbed the knife in their flesh, "you were a target. I was told to knock you off the board, out of the game, and I was never told how. I was so sick of hiding in the shadows forever, so I showed myself; what difference would it make if I'd kill you anyway? I thought we were both just testing the waters, trying to pretend these fights could be anything more. You weren't wearing your heart out on your sleeve," the criminal reasoned, raising their hands in a placating gesture so that the fuming hero would let them finish.

"But then that look in your eyes changed, your touches lingered more, and I wanted more. So that time in the alleyway, I realised I was no longer experimenting. But I couldn't have it. Stuff like this is not meant for people like us. So I ended it. Because that's all I know how to do."

Something entirely raw flashed across the villain's features as they leaned in closer to the hero, ignoring the stinging, the pain of their fractured arm; the breathlessness as they continued to lose blood, and their hand cupped the crime-fighter's jaw, their thumb stroking across it delicately. "You make me vulnerable," they whispered as their fingers skirted down the hero's neck, rubbing an old knot that seemed to tighten every time they were anxious.

Except instead of a shiver and a soft sigh as they relaxed into the touch, telling the villain they were magical, the hero let out a whimper, wrenching their eyes shut as furious tears streaked down their face. "Do you really wish to hurt me that much? You've already broken me, Villain, or what's left of me. You don't need to do any more!" they snapped.

"I just want you. Do you think if I wanted to kill you, I would leave you any chances? You know my ego is only a pretence, right?" the villain attested.

The hero's diamond-hard gaze softened as they carded their fingers through the villain's hair, closer to dark silk than anything else. "Stop hiding in the dark, then. We can both make it out of here alive. No one cares for our civilian identities," they reasoned, trying to sound as logical and rational as everyone else saw them.

Everyone but the villain, that is. Hero's desperation was not lost on them, and that realisation had pulled another choked sob out of their throat.

"You make me vulnerable," the villain repeated, voice laden with conviction, "and it used to scare me, yet now, I want nothing more," they finished, and for the first time since the hero had met them, the villain's eyes were wet with tears.

They hooked their good hand into the hero's, and both of them helped each other up.

Love, much like fire, can light up one's world, letting a comforting warmth seep through their form, mesmerising to any onlookers with its wild beauty. Yet, at times, it could be dangerous, its flames licking the skin of whomever falls victim to it. But just like fire, its vitality is of priceless value.

✨️Le Taglist: @larinzz @syberianjade @lateuplight @altu-interactions @enbious-prince @astr0-mj @thelazywitchphotographer @a-fucking-simp-00 @addictedsandwhichaki @justalittlecorrupted @quaggasus @theangstyclown @vernilliom @mothmancommitsarson @starssabove @kurai-hono-blog @talkingsperm @muffinrebel44 @sunnynwanda @annablogsposts @cardboardarsonist @itsmyworld23 @onlywhump @m3rakiii @crotchgoblin69 @wtfevenisausername @pendarling @avloki-pal @kaiwewi

Wanna be on the taglist? This'll take you there!

[widevibratobitch]

ventpost sorry losing my goddamn mind lol

i feel like shit also i havent texted back my friend who sent me her recordings and she was at some competition these last two days and i was trying to be supportive but my head just turned off on thursday and yesterday i was busy and its this kinda person that you cant just quickly view and respond because they'll immediately start a conversation with you so i really just didnt have the time and now i feel like shit and i really cant spend the energy for being supportive and patting her on the back and listening to how great and perfect her life is and i want to fucking die rn but if i dont respond today she's gonna hate me and/or be mad again and i cant fucking deal with that either and im just feeling so fucking horrible i think im legit just gonna cry can someone end this all for me plz like i dont understand what my whole fucking deal is with this but i suck so bad at texting back and meeting everyone's expectations everything i do is wrong and it's never fucking enough also i didnt ask for that to be a real actual friendship when we have any responsibilities and commitments to each other she just decided that one day and i like her i really do she's fun but this pressure is just too much and see fucking see this is why i try not to form deeper relationships with people it's cause i always inevitably fuck up no matter what im just not made for this there is something inherently wrong with me and i feel so fucking revolting and disgusting like i wanna tear my body to shreds with my bare hands i need a fucking break jesus h christ BASTA i really wish i were dead and burnt to ashes stream of consciousness ass post that makes no sense but im just daydreaming about all the different and more and more violent ways i could kill myself or better yet if someone could do if for me please my goddddddd oh and now my mom is calling and i gotta say im fine because she doesnt need any more sad shit like lmao yeah i cant even kill myself because of her now can i lol and lmao i hate my fucking life so much

[youredoinghorriblesweetie]

What He Would’ve Wanted

Ao’nung x Reader Angst

Can be read as platonic or romantic

Description: Ao’nung was trying to refuse going to Neteyam’s funeral after the battle, so it’s our job to convince him

Warnings: Neteyam’s death, Neteyam’s funeral, angst, Ao’nung is depressed and angry, one slap

Word count: 742 words

Why was everything so quiet? Barely anyone had spoken, maybe they were too sad themselves. You know you were. The sky people had attacked. Many were injured. Some were dead. The Tsahìk was overwhelmed with the amount of injured people, everyone who knew basic healing and wasn’t horribly hurt had been summoned to assist her.

But even so, when anyone did speak, it sounded so distant. Like they were trying to yell from the barrier of the reef and you were in the center of the island. It was mostly adults who had died, but there was one boy. He was your friend, Neteyam. Why did he have to go too? Why was the Great Mother so cruel as to take him when he was still barely a man? He had only just complete his Iknimiya. It was wrong.

Yet you couldn’t focus on that, everyone was sad. Not just you. You had to be strong. You had to help the people. You walked around, marui to marui, offering hugs, food, and drinking water to anyone inside. If they weren’t crying before, they certainly were once you hugged them. There was so much pain. Father, mothers, brothers, sisters, daughters, sons, and mates had been lost. Everyone was trying to hold themselves together, but in order to be put back together, you need to separate the pieces first.

Finally, you come to the Eyktan’s marui. Ao’nung sits inside, face blank, Tsireya sitting in front of him and holding his hands, trying to comfort him. Of course she had the same idea as you, she’s the sweetest girl in the clan. You approached them, sitting beside Tsireya.

“Hey, talk to me guys. I want to help you,” you gently whispered.

“He’s refusing to go to Neteyam’s funeral!” Tsireya shouted, she never shouts. And despite being the sweetest girl, always so happy and lovely, she sounded broken and angry. Probably angry at Ao’nung for what she just said. You sat shocked, Neteyam was all of our friend. Why would he not wish to come?

“What?! Ao’nung, you have to be there! It’s what Neteyam would have wanted!” You yell.

“And what do you know about what Neteyam would’ve wanted?! He’s gone now! He’s dead! He doesn’t want anything! I’m not going to let the last memory I have of him be his own dead body!” Ao’nung yells. Tears begin flowing down his face. Tsireya even looks shocked, she definitely hadn’t expected an outburst like that. Neither had you.

Before you can think, you hear a snap and feel a sting in your hand. Ao’nung’s face is turned, had you just slapped him? You had. And honestly, you didn’t feel bad about it.

“Neteyam may be gone now but his family was most important to him. No matter how angry and sad you are, imagine his brother and sisters. Imagine his mother and father. They’ve lost their elder brother and son. He would want us to be there to support them. Peace is found in community. Love is found in relationships, right now they need the relationship of friendship. And so do you. Everyone is upset. I promise you, EVERYONE. And yet, they still want to be there for the Sooli’s. You are the future chief. And I know it sounds harsh, and that you already feel the stress of the responsibilities, but you need to act like you can lead now more than ever. Your people are all devastated. Families have been lost. You’ve still got your sister, and mother, and father. You do not know their pain. So suck it up. They are hurting too. After the funerals, you can go and be sad and do whatever you want, but just this once, we all need you.” You rant.

He scowled, he knew you were right but by Eywa’s grace he did NOT want to do this. He didn’t try to speak, he would cry again if he did. He nodded at you, and you felt satisfied with that answer. You gave him a gentle side hug and left. He was going to break down again any moment and you knew only his baby sister was allowed to see that, they are each other’s support beam. Your heart hurts and you don’t want to leave them, but the Eyktan and Tsakarem have each other.

*cue funeral scene from the movie, I’m not writing it because I’ve already cried enough writing the rest of this*

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Author’s Note: yes I did indeed cry writing this. It hurts. I don’t know why I wanted to do this prompt, but here it is. Ask if you wish to be tagged in any other works. My masterlist is here and it has my request guidelines and everything so enjoy that. Have a nice day guys, go take a nap, you’ve earned it.

[starkid256]

can i rant about how bad 2023 is for me rq?

ok so in the first couple of months of 2023 i was doing great. new year new me amiright. i was chillin on the crk wiki n shit and i wasnt doing very well in school but what can you do the us education system is flawed and nothing can fix it. i made a contest for people to draw strawberry crepe cuz that was the rage and all. once the deadline hit, i was ready to make the prizes.

i hit the biggest fucking roadblock in my life.

i just got hit with the worst burnout and depression i have ever had in my life. it took 11-12 days to write something with 1k words. this depression is still there. it pains me to even attempt to draw or write or anything. whatever, depression like this is very common. eventually, i moved on from the crk wiki and went to comic studio.

oh. comic studio. where do i begin?

to start off, if you dont already know, comic studio is a website to share comics. shocker i know. i met some friends on here from there. some of my moots i met from cs. and yet, it was the worst thing that ever happened to me. there was drama left and right, mainly centering some specific sensitive users that ive blocked on here, there were people sending death threats and threatening to kill themselves every day. and i desperately told them that their lives had value. all of this drama and suicide baiting was absolutely murdering my mental health in cold blood, so when i broke my kindle screen, i had an episode where i nearly killed myself. no one saw. not anyone irl, not anyone online except for a friend who didnt take it seriously. i didnt really draw too much attention to it anyways. btw, all of this was happening while my dad ran off with my now stepmom and was dumb enough to put himself into a mentally abusive relationship. my mom, who i live with, hates those two so much. also my stepmom is queerphobic and has internalized conservativity.

i got tumblr as soon as i got my first phone, near the start of june. i love tumblr with all my heart, but it fucking murders your mental health nearly just as bad as cs. i mean, what do you expect from a website that makes you think that all the problems of the world are your fault? i have met great people here, but it still fucking sucks.

the real nail in the coffin was when a user on comic studio (who i have now blocked on tumblr) made a half baked shitty "callout post" on me. i will say, i did do something wrong that i apologized for afterwards, but everything else was past drama that they brought up even though i had already apologized for all of it. i apologized, and decided that i should leave comic studio. and so i did. keep in mind that all of this has been happening while my main family (which means excluding my dad and step mom) lives paycheck to paycheck.

now flash forward to the present. im on my phone for 14 hours a day on average laying on the couch scrolling through tumblr and watching youtube and playing roblox wishing i was dead. i have no one to blame for this behavior but myself. i would hope that the rest of 2023 is ok, but i already know i will have a horrible rest of the year. yeah this was a rly big rant. ily guys and i hope your 2023 was better than mine.

[googoobabajogwick]

Hot Knife chpt 7

descripton: You and John head out to get more answers plus argue some more which leaves you both miserable but perhaps not everything is as bad as it seems.

triggers: violence / talks of drugs / withdrawals / misogynistic slur 

word count:5.8k

mini authors note: im debating not posting my fic here lol might not but if i do it will be awhile :D

<------------>

Hot Knife Chapter 7: Still I Cling On

You and Jardani sat on the subway. Your body ached as you went through the withdrawals Doc had told you you would go through. Jardani had made you promise to quit using but many times you had ended up right back here. This time would be different. You were twenty five now and had a different outlook on life.

Even more so now that you and Jardani had been together for seven years. He’d really helped you through some dark days and nights although he himself struggled at times. He just did what felt right and somehow, it was always right. You laid your head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around you.

Your boyfriend was taking you out but you still had no clue where and every time you asked he smiled a huge smile showing off his teeth. He wouldn't tell you and while you hated surprises you knew Jardani would never do anything to upset you. Most of the time you could get it out of him but not this time. 

He had woken you up and you were pissed at first. Withdrawals sucked. Your body ached and shook and all you really wanted to do was snuggle up with him in bed until you couldn't take it and kicked him out of the bed. Why wouldn't he let you sleep through it? Asshole.

The irritability you felt at the feeling of him shaking you awake was enough for you to almost throw the lamp on your bedside table at him. Jardani was healthier though and caught your wrist. He had a surprise. You'd think he’d tell you what it was, considering how you already hated surprises and were in discomfort, but no. You were getting too depressed, another symptom of withdrawals.

Jardani wanted you to get out of the apartment and as much as you wanted to hit him for disrupting your small moments of relief, he was too cute. Despite your shaking and sweating he dragged you out of bed and onto public transportation as his car had been destroyed, once again. 

You looked like death; pale, chapped lips covered in chapstick, horrible bags under your eyes, sweating like crazy in a pair of sweatpants and an oversized shirt. People stared and you stared right back until they looked away. Some people were way too bold, if only they knew how dangerous the strange couple they stared at was. 

“How much longer?” You croaked out in Belarussian. 

“Almost there baby.” He responded in Russian. 

You rolled your eyes. Jardani would never speak his native language, opting for the more commonly used language at the theater, Russian. When you first met him, Belarusian, Ukrainian and English were all you spoke but everyone was taught multiple different languages. Your boyfriend didn’t care for his life before Roma Ruska took him in. 

You didn’t blame him but you wished he’d talk to you in the language you loved most. That was what you shared. He was stubborn though and only would during his most serious and intimate moments with you. Before you knew it he was standing up and bringing you with him. 

As the two of you got off he wrapped his arm around you once more and guided you down the street. It was warm out and the birds were chirping. Mid-spring was always your favorite time of the year. Not too hot, not too cold and everything was regrowing from the dead of winter. The winters in New York sucked, not enough sunlight.

“Night day out, yeah?” Jardani asked you. 

You nodded and continued to analyze your surroundings, he was taking you towards some private hangers. He’d brought you here before but you were confused because he didn’t have a car this time. You turned to him, confused, but he continued to walk. 

The two of you entered the property and he got behind you to covered your eyes. 

“Ok. What are you doing?” You asked unamused. 

“Trust me?”

“Always.” Your response was immediate. “Well sometimes because sometimes your judgment can be questionable.” 

Jardani just chucked and continued to walk with you. After a minute of walking you felt him pull away and you opened your eyes. In front of you was obviously a car under a blanket. You crossed your arms as he went to pull the fabric off. Then you tried to stop the awe from breaking out on your face as he revealed a Black Ford Falcon with heavy tinted windows. 

“This is your new car?”

“Well, after I destroyed my last car…”

You cut him off.

“You’re always destroying your cars”

“I just haven’t found the perfect one. I’m meeting with a seller soon, a 1969 Ford Mustang. Anyways I needed a new one.”

His dream car. You smiled at him and then took a look at your dream car. It was so nice you couldn’t help but be saddened by the fact it would probably be destroyed within a week, thanks to Jardani. He watched you with his hands on his hips before opening the passenger door. 

You got in and he jogged to the driver's side. Your hands ran along the smooth dash and they itched to grab the steering wheel. He turned the key and the engine roared to life. A giddy laugh escaped your throat as you forgot all about your withdrawal symptoms. 

“How much was this thing?” You asked him worried, yet excited.

Jardani shrugged his shoulders but you could see the mischief in his eyes.

“Does it matter? We’re rich.”

Before you knew it he hit the gas and began to take you on a little joy ride. Drifting around corners, passing people and speeding like crazy. You laughed and shouted and held onto his bicep for dear life even though you’d done this many times and knew he’d never let anything bad happen to you.

When the ride was over he pulled in front of your shared apartment. You coughed, still trying to catch your breath from laughing and having so much fun. Jardani sat and watched you in awe. He loved seeing you happy. The entire ride he was watching you from his peripheral vision, if he didn’t have to stare at the road he’d keep his eyes on you. 

Jardani was very excited for what came next. The two of you sat in silence in the car, your hand held his. He brought your knuckles up to kiss them while gazing into your eyes. You felt butterflies and your face heat up, so charming and sweet he’d put even the most chivalrous knight to shame. 

“It’s yours.” Jardani whispered against your knuckles.

Your eyes went wide and you ripped your hand away from him.

“What?”

“This car. I bought it for you.” 

You scoffed, expecting him to tell you it was a joke but the words never came.

“My goddess is hurting.” His hand caressed your cheek. “I can't have that. Let’s go camping together, just get away for a bit. There’s a contract I have… maybe you could help me.” 

Shocking enough— considering the thought of going on a hit at a time like this hadn’t even crossed your mind— another huge, even bigger than before, smile graced your lips. The woods would do you some good, a great place to detox. You’d never felt happier and you leaned over to claim his lips in a kiss. His hands came up to cup the sides of your face as the two of you made out. 

It was rough and sloppy as your fingers threaded through his hair and pulled him closer to you. You loved him so much you almost wanted to absorb him, become one with him. He knew just how to make things better. Both of you broke apart and were out of breath.

“I love you so much.”

Jardani returned the sentiment as you undid your belt buckle and he expected you to climb onto his lap. Instead you started to squeeze yourself into the back. 

He had to help you since it was a tight fit but once you got back there you sat, your arms stretched out around the back of the seats and your legs spread open. Your boyfriend couldn’t help but think you looked like a dude and smirked. 

“Well first I should say thank you… but I think there’s something more important that needs to be done.” 

“What’s that?” 

You gave Jardani a knowing simper and brought your hand down to pat your thigh. 

“I think it’s time to christen the thing. Why don’t you get back here and eat my pussy?” Your hands were on their way to push your sweat pants down. 

He let out a mesmerized chuckle at your crass words. 

“Okay.” 

Instead of the smarter decision to get out and meet you he himself tried to shove his way in the back. Your hands came up, leaving the waistband of your sweats, to grab him by his jacket and help pull him to you. You kissed him as his much larger body struggled to meet you in the back. Your gut was going to bust with the amount of laughing you were doing today. 

Eventually he made it in the back and all that could be seen and heard from the outside was a car rocking and giggles from inside. 

*

You tried to focus on the road as John shot out the window next to you at the men chasing you down in their car. Both of you were trying to get to this cafe but were finding it difficult. This was the third car since you left the King’s place that has tried to run you off the road.

Your head ducked the best it could as the back window was shot and shattered everywhere. The car was almost destroyed and you felt your heart breaking into little tiny pieces. Your ex came back into the car and reloaded his pistol. You swerved the car trying to get them off your tail but your attempts were futile. 

John had killed two of the passengers but couldn’t get the driver. Your hands turned the wheel and you lightly hit the brakes before hitting the gas again. If he wouldn’t stop following you, you’d do what you had to do. You side swiped the car causing it to crash into a ditch. Your brain hurt imagining the damage you were doing to this beautiful machine. 

The way the car crashed gave John a perfect shot of the driver and he pulled the trigger, shooting him in the head. 

“The poor car…” You whined while drifting around the corner and not stopping. 

Your ex gave you a sympathetic look.

“I get it.”

“Yeah right if you understood you’d stop destroying every nice thing you owned.” Your voice was filled with attitude.

You were still pissed about yesterday. The car may have brightened your mood a bit but you were still miserable. Plus it was destroyed now, reminding you again, that every good thing comes to an end in your life. You thought about yesterday. 

John’s low blow’s usually hurt deep. He didn’t answer you and opted to look out the broken window, knowing exactly why you were upset. 

John knew you remembered last night but it was obvious it didn’t change anything. He felt torn, not knowing his feelings for you were going to be that intense that fast, he felt guilty. She wouldn’t be mad. He would remind himself. Then why do you feel so wrong? He shook his head without even thinking. 

“What?” You asked. 

Christ. Did you always have to be watching him? 

“Nothing.” He said in a curt tone. 

“Fine.” You bit back and the gas light turned on. “Great. Almost out of gas. We should probably walk anyway.” 

John nodded as you pulled over in a parking lot. You got out and stretched your arms and legs as they felt sore from all the jerking around you did in the car. These people were insane. All for money too, you could never understand that and you were dirt poor as a child! Then you were an orphan and even then you wouldn’t risk your life the way these people would. 

Not for money at least. There would always be more hits in the future. 

Shutting his door, he couldn’t help but watch. The permanent glare on your face was a bit endearing. John knew this all must be so weird to you. You never understood why people did what they did. Well, you could but this whole situation was a new level of crazy and the two of you had been in some strange situations together. 

You took one more look at the car. A deep frown on your face. Such a waste. It was riddled with bullets and almost all the windows were destroyed. This pain you felt… This is exactly why you never bought another Ford Falcon in your life. You didn’t deserve them. 

John would laugh if he knew for sure you wouldn’t swing at him, which he didn’t, so he continued to observe. He still remembered the day you lost the one he bought for you in an explosion. There was no saving or restoring it. You cried but it was more due to all the memories you made with and in it. 

With one more goodbye you turned on your heel and began to walk in the direction of the cafe. If you were right it would be a twenty minute walk. John gave the non sentient object a nod and followed in your steps, hanging back a couple of feet the entire way there. 

The walk took twenty minutes, thankfully there was no one to make it longer. You stared up at the old sign that said “Sandies''. It was an older building and cute. You’d even take your daughters there if you weren’t about to go in and fuck shit up. 

John looked at you, to see if you were ready and you shrugged. He acknowledged you and walked in first. You followed and looked around the diner. Not many people were inside. There was a waitress pouring a man a cup of coffee near the back, the cook and a table of three men sitting together. 

It was like out of the movies; everyone stopped and stared at you. Even the waitress stopped pouring the coffee. The older of the three sitting together, eyes widened before he nodded at the younger men. John continued to observe the situation and then all hell broke loose.

Everyone pulled out a gun and a laugh of disbelief almost left your throat. Seriously? Back in the 80’s and 90’s there were a lot of assassins but this was insane. Even the fry boys were hit men these days? A lot of things were different. Everyone stared at each other and everything moved in slow motion. 

John lifted his suit jacket to cover himself as everyone started shooting. You watched as the bullets rolled off his jacket like oil in water. The thing you noticed was that everyone was shooting at each other, which made you realize the bounty went up. It was too high to not at least attempt. 

The two young men jumped from their seats, shielding themselves from all bullets. They ran past the two of you and out the door. You grabbed John, who was about to join the shooting and pulled him behind the host stand. He looked at you with confusion written all over his face. 

John’s eyes followed where yours were when he saw you staring out the glass door. The two men were racing to their car, trying to get the doors open fast. You opened the diner door and one almost fell over as you shot him in the leg. Curses left your mouth as you shoved the door open even more and focused. 

It was hard not to celebrate when your bullet went through the back window and hit the passenger in the head. The driver sped off and you could only hope he’d bleed out before he got to where he needed to go. You turned back towards John and held up one finger, indicating you killed one. He gave you a small dip of the head. 

When you both returned to the fighting in the diner you saw the waitress was fighting with the man who sent the boys off while the fry cook was shooting at the lonely man. You would go after them and John would get the other two. Out of all these people there was only one that needed to be alive and it was the older man. 

With a small bob of your head you ran for the kitchen. You held your own jacket up, hoping it would help you like it did John. A bullet hit you and knocked you to the ground and you groaned. It still hurt like hell. While you were down the lone man decided to go after you but you grabbed his legs and spun yourself, knocking him in the ground. His head hit the ground disorienting him while you jumped on him, shooting him in the face. 

You groaned and you knew there would be a bruise but you got back up, continuing your sprint to the kitchen. Your shoulder hit the swinging door and you ducked fast to avoid getting smashed in the face by a frying pan. When you got back up he had his gun pointed at you. 

Like second nature you grabbed his wrist, aiming the gun away from you as he shot. You pulled him towards you and twirled yourself around. John tended to use this move a lot, more than you did. It was very effective. You hit him in the stomach and then neck. As he doubled over you grabbed his shoulders and the back of his head, slamming his skull agains the nearest hard surface. 

It just so happened that that hard surface was the stove. The man let out a horrific scream as his flesh sizzled before you pulled him back up and shoved your knife into his throat, ending his misery. His body made a ‘thud’ sound as it hit the ground. You let out a deep breath and pulled your pistol back out. 

The sounds of gun fire seemed to have stopped. You flicked the clip out of your gun and grabbed a new one off your hip. Only three rounds were used but you reloaded anyways. You could never be too careful. Not wasting another second you walked out. 

Your gun was raised and ready to shoot. The waitress was dead on the ground and John was holding the man up by his collar. His face was bloody from the beating he received from the Baba Yaga. You rolled your eyes. This is why he needed you. Too much brawn and no brain. 

You walked up and took your backpack off your shoulders. While digging around you heard the man start to chuckle. 

“So it’s true. The Angel of Death is back. Tell me, has La Saint-Glinglin finally occurred? I’ll never tell you a thing.” His French accent was thick. 

“No it hasn't. Something crazier happened; you pissed off John Wick meaning, you all have annoyed me enough to help him clean up his mess. I had a reputation too, y'know.” You didn’t look up until you found what you were looking for.

Everyone could say what they wanted about John but to undermine you… Even your ex felt sick at the sight of the long needle. You definitely brought that for times like this. The man’s smug smile dropped as he swallowed. You could get anyone to talk and he knew it as well. 

“Hold him up facing me and time me John.”

He grunted and looked out the window. Torture wasn’t that fun to John. Not like it was for you. To him it was a necessary thing that had to be done sometimes. He stuck to the basics while you enjoyed coming up with the worst ways to get someone to talk. Though he couldn’t lie, you were very efficient at it, due to your anatomical knowledge. 

John would stop you if it got to be too much. He listened to you as you walked up to the man and explained how you knew where every major nerve ending was. You observed his body trying to decide where you wanted to poke him. Right as you pressed the needle into the skin where you wanted he spoke.

“Chucks Auto Mechanic’s up in the Western part of New York. Niagara Falls, Hugo keeps his guns there. That’s what you wanted right?” He spoke fast and looked at John, “Right?” 

You turned to John. 

“Pathetic, I hadn’t even done anything yet. Anyways It’s about a seven hour drive if we don’t get stopped.” More like a day with how things were going. 

“Oh you’ll get stopped.” The man chuckled. “Once my boys tell everyone that bounty is going to double. Like a swarm of bugs. Baba Yaga and his psycho bitch…” 

You jabbed the needle into his musculocutaneous nerve, making him scream. John had to hold on tighter as he jerked around. You would never tolerate anyone calling you that. Never had and never would.

“You can kill him now Jonathan.” 

John nodded and though the man began to plead— he did tell you what you wanted to know!— your ex felt a bit of satisfaction hearing the man’s neck snap. He let go of the body and you watched it fall. Stupid fuck should’ve known he was going to die the second you walked into that place. 

“Well we should get going. Normally it’s about seven hours but given how long it took to get here…. I’d say we’d be lucky to get there by tomorrow afternoon.” You turned once more to stare at your partner. 

John agreed and you walked over to the dead waitress. You bent down and began rummaging through her pockets. Her death saddened you but she chose to fight, to try and kill the Baba Yaga but failed and you needed a car. When you felt her keys you tossed them to him. 

You had enough driving for now. As you made your way outside you turned to say something to John; a classic mistake. He shoved you to the ground just in time to grab the arm of the man who swung a machete at you. Your head hit the concrete and your vision went blurry. 

John had seen him the second you walked out. The man was able to slice through his suit and cut his side but you didn’t see. You were still on the concrete trying to figure out what the fuck just happened. The attacker was thrown to the ground and he shot him in the head. 

You groaned and John came over to help you up. When you stood up you wobbled a bit and didn’t notice as you reached out to steady yourself on an object, that object was him. He tensed under your hand. 

“Fuck you.” You spit at him as you walked towards the car. 

A few seconds later John got into the driver's seat. He started the car and sat there for a moment before putting the car in drive. The first few minutes were silent as you rubbed the sore spot in your head and he thought about what to say. That was a good ‘wack’ on the ground but you didn’t pass out which was good. You sighed and he decided to break the silence. 

“We should talk.” 

John didn’t mean to tense up but he couldn’t help it. You’d never listen or believe him, he knew this. He’d like to try and talk to you, to explain himself. In fact you 're probably the only one still left on this Earth he felt like he could talk to for hours. 

“No.” You continued to look out the window.

John called your name and you turned your head to look at him. 

“Twenty years…”

“John shut up.” Your words were threatening, “I don’t want to hear your shit.” 

John was not pleased and you could tell by the look on his face. You didn’t care though. The second he told you he wished he was with Helen and not you, you knew there was no point. Your want for closure would never happen. You wanted to smack yourself upside the head.

How could things ever be civil when you acted the way you did and he acted the way he did? You didn’t want to date him again but if you couldn’t even touch him without him being uncomfortable— and you had to touch him if he got hurt— how would things ever change?

John was miserable. He didn’t want to argue with you at a time like this, he didn’t want to argue with you at all! If he was alone he’d groan out loud. Why? He knew you and what you were like. To imagine that this whole ordeal would end with the two of you being best friends and reminiscing about the past was wishful thinking. 

No, not wishful thinking but desperation. John could only rely on himself. He couldn’t trust almost anyone. Nobody was as good as him but one person and that person was you. Working with you was like having eyes on the back of his head. With you everything was possible. He was desperate and couldn’t give up yet.

“Twenty years is a long time to forget someone’s touch. I need time.”

Not to mention it’s been a couple months since someone touched him in a friendly way. Even you tried to beat his ass when he came to see you. Your stomach dropped as you got angrier. It wouldn’t have been twenty years if he left with you. You turned your body fully towards him.

“And whose fault is that…?”

“Yours.”

The two of you said at the same time. John heard your laugh of disbelief and braced himself for the inevitable argument. 

“I think that’s the issue here, Jardani, you seemed to have forgotten why we haven’t talked in twenty years.” You pointed your finger at him, “you chose The High Table over me. How ironic.”

He breathed in through his nose. 

“I didn’t. You up and left. I thought you would come back. You vanished.” His words were calm but you could tell by his body language he was upset. 

Your hands clenched as you wanted to cry but you wouldn’t. Not this time, it would be humiliating. To see him sitting there all chill while you sobbed over something that happened twenty years ago? You did cry about it still but not right in front of him where you’d be trapped in a small space for hours. 

“I was clear on my intentions.”

Clear? John thought to himself. About as clear as mud in his opinion. You’d say one thing and mean the other, then when he began to treat things with that mindset you’d get upset! The two of you’d ‘break up’ constantly. You’d argue, sleep in separate rooms for about a day or two before you were right back in each other's arms. That never happened with Helen. 

John didn’t want to compare the two of you but he couldn’t help it. Helen had shown him what it was like to be in a happy and healthy relationship. Yet when he was with her he couldn’t help but think of you and now that you’re here he couldn’t stop thinking about her. His mind was in turmoil. He had to stop comparing the two of you. 

“On that we disagree. But-“ you tried to talk but he continued on, “we need to work together. After all of this we can talk.”

You stayed silent because he was right. There was no way out now. It was better to be friends right now than enemies, even if you wanted to rip his head off. Though you’d rather rip your tongue out and throw it at him, you agreed. 

“Fine.” You said with gritted teeth and went back to your window. 

John let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding. Finally, that was progress in his opinion. His shoulders even felt a little lighter too. He looked at you and gave you a small smirk but you were too busy mean mugging the window once more. His smirk became a small smile before his eyes went back to the road. 

“Questions?” He asked you.

You couldn’t help but perk up from your brooding fest and give him a coy smile.

“You know I could never pass up playing questions. You first.” 

John appeared to be thinking for a few seconds.

“How did you find out you were pregnant?” He wondered.

“I wouldn’t stop throwing up and I had convinced myself it was because of how upset I was. Then Algo threw a pregnancy test in front of me while I was on the couch.” You laughed, “I almost shit myself honestly. I considered an abortion but I’m not sure what made me change my mind still.” 

John smiled at your story. He couldn’t imagine what he would have done if he was there. Abortion seemed like the most likely answer. Deep down though he knew he would’ve been ecstatic. Plus you had girls, he always wanted a daughter and you gave him two. He felt sad that he didn’t get to experience fatherhood, especially with the fact he had actual children. 

Believe it or not, you regretted it but it couldn't be undone. You knew he would’ve been the biggest pushover when it came to them. You also knew he’d never sleep well ever again, just like you. Living the life you had, knowing everything you knew it was terrifying bringing two little babies into the world. 

They didn’t leave your room until they were five. The first few nights they slept in their own room you didn’t sleep. You couldn’t. When they were older you did background checks on all their friends but only to see if any of their family members had ties. You didn’t really care about anything else. It was a stressful time for you overall. 

With everything going on you were surprised you didn’t miscarry but you were glad you didn’t. You loved your girls more than anything. It sent fear running through your veins knowing you weren’t with them but you trusted Algorithm to keep them safe. You trusted her more than anyone. 

“Okay my turn. Do you approve of the names I picked out?” 

“Yes.” John nodded. 

Had you brought those names to him all those years ago, he wouldn’t change a thing. That made you feel better

considering Tatyana hated her name. It shouldn’t make you feel so insecure but you couldn’t help it. You had put a lot of thought into their names. 

“Did you ever date anyone else?” The man couldn’t help himself.

You stared at him. After the two of you broke up you never wanted to date again, ever. Without Jardani in your life you could one hundred percent admit you hated men. Plus no one could handle you and you were skeptical and suspicious of everyone. Long story short, no, you hadn’t but why would you admit that to him? 

“I plead the fifth on that one.” You chuckled. 

“Rules—“ John began to speak. 

“I don’t care about rules and I know you certainly don’t either. I’m changing them, I’m allowed to plead the fifth on this one.” Your ruling was final. 

John looked over at you. You seemed pretty nervous. Had you never found anyone? It wouldn’t surprise him but it saddened him a little bit. He had no clue though you could even have a significant other right now. If you did, you were very good at hiding them… He had to ask. 

“Are you seeing anyone currently?” His face went bright red at his words.

“Christ John!  Why do you wanna know about my dating life? Seems like you’re going to ask me out.” You were flabbergasted.

John shook his head no. 

“N-No I…” He didn’t know what to say. 

There was no other explanation besides that it was his own personal curiosity. John looked like a fool. You wanted to laugh. He could always be so awkward. Cool, calm and collected when he needed to be but sometimes he was too easy to fluster. You smirked and basked in his misery for a few more seconds.

“No, I’m not.” 

John refused to look you in your eyes. You were having fun and if he wasn’t so damn embarrassed he’d be happy you were laughing. He wished it would’ve been at something he said though and not him himself. Your hand came up as you rubbed your chin in thought. 

You watched John shift, feeling uncomfortable under your gaze. How could you stop messing with him now? It was your favorite thing to do and he knew that too. Your ex kept his eyes glued to the road and you wondered if he was trying to picture you not there. An evil giggle left you. 

“Did you cry over me?” You asked. 

“I plead the fifth.” 

That was a yes. You snorted and that appeared to be the end of your little game. Still, you couldn’t stop thinking about what he said. Twenty years was a long time to forget someone’s touch, he’ll have to get used to it eventually. The silence for once was comfortable. 

You watched as you left the small town and the buildings began to bleed into trees and greenery. A camping trip sounded fun, maybe everyone could go camping when all of this was done. Depending on how your talk after this mission went, maybe even John could come. 

Kat and Darya would love to mess with him, especially when they found out just how easy it was. Until then you had a good idea on how to help John learn your touch again. 

“John?” You called his name.

He grunted to let you know he heard you.

“I’m going to put my hand on your arm and you will burn it into your memory.” 

You didn’t give John time to answer even if he didn’t want you to touch him you didn’t care. You poked his bicep and then laid your hand down. This time he didn’t tense up and the two of you sat like that for an hour. He couldn’t help but feel like everything was starting to look up. 

[rp-meme-central]

In Space With Markiplier - Pt. 2 - sentence starters

1. “Did _____ give up, or did she/he/they move on? All a matter of perspective, I suppose.” 

2. “My goodness, what an adventure. I swear, this story never ceases to amaze me.” 

3. “It’s good to see you again. Or for the first time, depending on your past choices.” 

4. “Was it the nightmare about the spaceship again? That one just keeps coming back, doesn’t it?” 

5. “Not really one for romance. Or, at least, that’s what _____ used to say. Right before the divorce.” 

6. “I can’t wait for our second date. I know our first one got a little away from us, but this one will be so much better.” 

7. “You need to keep your knife clean. You never know when you might need it.” 

8. “I guess I owe you an apology. I was wrong. I was wrong about a lot of things.” 

9. “I’m tired, ____. I’m very tired. I’ve been trying for so long to fix things. I don’t think I fixed anything at all actually.” 

10. “For what it’s worth, you were an excellent captain. You never gave up on your crew. Not even once.” 

11. “Why don’t you just take a break? You know, relax. Let’s be honest with ourselves: It’s not like you’ll be able to help, anyway.” 

12. “Current ship status: absolutely catastrophic. Just the way you like it.” 

13. “Outgunned but not outmatched. Just like old times, eh, _____?” 

14. “You used that, didn’t you? Who gave it to you? And also, give it to me. I need it. Please.” 

15. “Why? Why do you want to destroy everything? How could you?” 

16. “I swear to protect and uphold the laws of nature, no matter what or whom gets in our way. This I swear.” 

17. “Do you understand what is going on out there? Do you understand what is at stake? People are dying because of this.” 

18. “Sorry. Remodeled recently. This is my kitchen, not my lab.” 

19. “I spent all of this time trying to find you, and it’s you that finds me.” 

20. “There’s still time to save the universe. There has to be. Otherwise, why are we still here?” 

21. “Am I dead? Oh, sorry. I really thought I was dying. I really did.” 

22. “Everything has to end, ______. It has to. It doesn’t matter how tightly you hold onto things, they’ll still just slip right through your fingers.” 

23. “You’ll always make mistakes. You have to. And that’s okay. I just wish I’d learned that sooner.” 

24. “For what it’s worth, I’m glad I got to share this adventure with you.” 

25. “Sorry about that. Couldn’t afford to let you make another mistake.” 

26. “I can’t undo what you’ve done. Not here, anyway. Or, at least, not now.” 

27. “If I could go back, if I could try again, if I could stop you before any of this even started, maybe I could save everyone.”

28. “What the hell was that?! Was that sand? Who throws sand?” 

29. “_____, no! You’ll destroy everything! Again!” 

30. “Please! This is it! This is the end of everything. Everyone who ever existed is going to get wiped out unless you let me go!” 

31. “What have you done? You’ve destroyed us. You destroyed everything.” 

32. “____, I’m tired. I don’t know when the last time I slept was. I don’t know if I’ve slept at all. Have you?”

33. “I guess I lost hope. But you didn’t. You never did.” 

34. “You look like you’ve been through hell. Yeah, cryo-sleep sucks, but coffee can help.” 

35. “And... thank you. For not giving up on me. Just thank you.” 

36. “Greetings. You may be wondering where you are and how you got here. Me, too.” 

37. “Oh no, it’s fine. Write whatever you want. It’s infinite power, that’s all. No big deal.” 

38. “You stupid, stupid fool. Do you have any idea what you’ve done? Actions have consquences.” 

39. “Looks like I’ll have to fight my way out of another one.” 

40. “Who wants to read a dumb romance that’s just going to remind you of all of your own inadequacies and mistakes and how if you’d just tried a little harder then maybe you would actually deserve to be loved?” 

41. “I’ve seen many, many crimes in my time, but I’ll never get used to this.” 

42. “Oh, it never gets any easier, but that’s what makes it so fun. Every time is a new experience. Always grisly. Always horrible.” 

43. “It’s your first kill, and I don’t want to be greedy. So why don’t you take a stab at it?” 

44. “Damn it. The cops. Many, many cops. Were you followed?” 

45. “The stabbing’s been the hardest to kick. Everybody just wants to turn around in a place where there’s no guards and no cameras, and I’m just like ‘Hello! Everyone knows I love to stab!’”

46. “Oh my god, it’s you. It’s been - I don’t know how long it’s been, time doesn’t really work the same, but, man, it’s been a while.” 

47. “I know this probably isn’t even real, and it’s probably all just one big dream, but I am just so glad we met.” 

48. “I won’t take no for an answer. And I won’t take yes, either. No choices at all, really. Haven’t you had enough of those?” 

49. “Let me order you a ride, since your previous one seems to have been stabbed by an unknown assailant.” 

50. “Oh, ______, that is so sweet, but you know your cooking will kill me.”