#harry potter maps

[jegulus-till1die]

“the marauders got the teenage years the golden trio couldn’t and the golden trio got the adulthood the marauders couldn’t get”

STFU😭😭😭😭

[icedcoffeebabyy]

I fear no fancast will ever match how sexy Sirius Black actually is.

[gottabewolfstar]

why is another guy calling MY MOONY "moony"? ☹️

[darkcademiasss]

Reblog if you've ever stayed up all night to read a fanfiction about dead gay wizards on a School night

[antsrust]

The boys <3

[juleswritesstuff]

Am I the only one who thinks most of the Marauders and the Slytherin Skittles would have the biggest praise kink in history ?

warnings: smut

Just a little thought I had today. Let me know if you want a part two with the reader and the boys' roles reversed, I'll be more than happy to comply 😉

Enjoy💗

James would have one because of his constant need to be perfect, to be what he thinks the others need him to be: the perfect son, the perfect friend, the perfect student. But he always has doubts ‘am I enough ?’, ‘am I doing enough ?', ‘will they like me ’, ‘what if they don’t ? what if they hate me ?’ He needs to be reassured that he is. He is enough, he is more than enough. 

I feel like it would be more prominent while he is intimate with you. He is mostly afraid of not living up to the expectation he thinks you have of him. So you make sure he knows that he makes you literally touch the sky.

‘That was the best match i’ve ever watched ! Merlin, you were brilliant on that broom James’ after Gryffindor wins the last match of the year.

‘What do you mean ‘stupid’ ? They’re your glasses baby, they help you see. And you look really hot wearing them in my opinion’ after he overhears someone talking about another person and saying they look stupid with that specific pair of glasses.

‘Like that, baby. You’re doing so good’ while he is covering your neck with kisses and gentle bites.

‘Yes, yes, fuck, right there Jamie’ after a particularly deep and strong thrust leaves you breathless.

‘You look so good between my legs, love’ while he is eating you out messily and hungrily and so, so perfectly.

‘No one feels as good as you. No one could ever make me feel the way you do, James’ while he is still inside of you, catching his breath and looking at you with devotion.

‘Are you sure it was ok ?’

‘James, it was more than ok. My legs are shaking baby, that's a sign that it was pretty damn amazing’

‘Are you serious ?’

‘Apart from the very lame joke I am sure you’re thinking about, yes, I am. Actually, why don’t I show you how serious I really am ?’

‘What do you mean, baby?’

‘I mean that you’re gonna fuck me again and i’ll show you how much I always crave your lips, then a third time and i’ll make sure the entire castle hears how you can make me cry with just your tongue, then a fourth because that perfect dick of yours needs to be fucking worshipped, and, finally, a fifth to show you that you fuck me so good that not a single coherent thought processes in my head when you're taking me apart on your cock, Jamie’ 

Remus would have one because he has hated himself his whole life. He feels like a monster, like he doesn’t deserve all the love he is surrounded by, like all the good things people say about him are just lies. And he knows the truth, he knows he is nothing but an horrid creature and that he doesn’t deserve to be loved. Except that it isn’t the truth, and you tell him everyday.

With him I feel like it would be more out of the bedroom, and outside of sex, but not exclusively.

‘You’re really good at that spell Remus, mind showing me how it’s done ?’ after he gets a rather difficult charm right at the first try.

‘You look very hot today, Rem. Well, you look hot everyday actually’ which makes him blush from head to toes.

‘You’re the best, you know ? You really are’ after he explains a difficult concept that nobody else got, but him.

‘Holy hell, right there Remus. You feel way too good’ while he eases in and out of you with a steady rhythm, knocking the air out of your lungs.

‘You take such good care of me’ while he is going down on you, slowly, sensually and with a glint of hunger in his eyes, knowing exactly what to do to make you fall apart.

‘I love you, you know that right ?’

‘Yes, darling. You tell me everyday’ 

‘Well, that’s not enough. From now on, I'll tell you twice a day’

‘But why ?’

‘Because it’s true' and then you give him the sweetest kiss.

Sirius would have one because he has been told his whole life that he wasn’t enough. That he needed to be better, to do better, to be a better heir for the Noble House of Black, to be a better son, to be a better brother. He was told that he was worthless, that his parents had no use in having a son like him. He was a disappointment, a shame to the family. For them he didn’t exist anymore.

But for you he was the most perfect person to ever walk on earth. Your brightest star.

He would love it both inside and outside the bedroom. I feel like he would also ask you to tell him something that makes him feel good, especially when he is having a bad day. He has no problem being praised in public, but he becomes especially vulnerable when you’re intimate because he can finally let go.

‘Tell me what did I do to have the best boyfriend ever ?’ After he brings you flowers one day because he told you they reminded them of you.

‘It’s ok Sirius, you’ll get it eventually. You’re one of the best students, you just need a bit more time which is totally fine’ after the tenth time he tries to get one of the most difficult spells right, only for it to go wrong.

‘You’re worth it Sirius. You’re worth every single good thing that happens to you, never doubt that’ after he breaks down reading one of his mothers older letters, full of foul words directed at him.

‘You’re such a good boy, aren’t you ?’ after he listens to you so well, kissing every inch of your body.

‘Fuck, you should see yourself baby. You look so good, so perfect for me’ while you’re on his lap, riding him slowly to savor that sultry fucked out expression on his face that makes you go feral.

‘You’re so sweet, Sirius, do you know that ? So fucking sweet’ after you bob your head on his length, swirling your tongue around his head to suck gently as his taste coats your mouth.

‘Was I good ?’

‘You’re always good, Sirius. More than’

‘Are you sure ?’

‘Do you want me to describe in detail how good you are at splitting me open in every position known to man ? Because I can do that if you want. Might take three whole days though, a week if you want me to talk about that sinful tongue of yours, too’

‘I think we have enough time’ and then you both start laughing.

Regulus would have one because he’s been second his whole life. Second for his brother, second for his parents before Sirius left , sometimes he feels second even for his friends. He thinks no one cares deeply about him, he’s just there as a rebound. He’s never been anyone’s first choice, and he thinks he never will be.

You make sure he knows that not only he would be your first choice in every lifetime, but that he would also be the only choice for you, no one else would or could ever compare. He is the center of your universe after all.

I feel like he would blush like crazy and pretend he is annoyed by your words when you’re in public and you praise him even for the simplest thing, but his eyes would also warm up a little, just for a second, before going back to his blank and rather stoic expression. He would be a mess in the bedroom though, when he can finally let go and he allows himself to feel good about the sweet words that leave your lips.

‘You have the prettiest eyes I have ever seen’ after he catches you staring at him for a moment too long.

‘Your poems are literally art, Regulus. I can’t believe you can write like this, you know this is pure talent, right ?’ after he shows you his poems for the first time and you nearly cry because more than half of them are dedicated to you.

‘You were so good up there, Reggie. And the way you caught the Snitch ? Fucking incredible. You are incredible’ after Slytherin wins one of the biggest matches of the season thanks to Regulus catching the Snitch one minute from the end.

‘You feel so good, love. Stretching me out so well’ after his cock slides inside of you perfectly, filling you up so nicely.

‘Eyes on me, Regulus. They’re so gorgeous, I want them focused me while I make you cum, ok ? Be good and keep them open’ as you stroke his length up and down, feeling the velvety soft skin on your palm as you give his head a gentle suck, tasting him on your tongue.

‘You’re so pretty when you’re all fucked out, Reggie. You feel so good taking me like this’ while you’re riding him and he looks at you with hazy eyes, lust and pure bliss fogging his brain’

‘I’m yours Regulus. I’m undoubtedly, irrevocably and utterly yours’

‘Promise me’

‘I promise, I’m not going anywhere. I’m afraid you’re stuck with me forever, actually’

‘Mmh, it’s gonna be hard, but I’ll survive I guess’ while you’re still joined, one body and one soul as you kiss him slowly and sweetly, his tone sarcastic but betrayed by the smile that's progressively growing on his lips.

Barty would have one because his father never gave him his attention. He was never enough for him, never a good son, never a good student, never good. He was constantly ignored, and the few times his father acknowledged him was to tell him that he was a lost cause, a disgrace, a shame. He was just a stupid boy, too reckless, too careless, too unhinged, too much, and, at the same time, never enough. But it wasn’t like that. He was a bit impulsive, and sometimes he went a little bonkers, but he was a good person, and there were people who cared about him and his well being. You always made sure he knew that. He was your priority.

I have a feeling that he would be completely unashamed of being praised in public exactly like he is praised in the bedroom. Probably not in front of the whole school, but he wouldn't really care if people eavesdropped, his crooked grin widening when he notices their horrified faces. It is  their fault, they could mind their own damn business.

‘Yes, Barty, you’ve been a good boy’ after he asks you if he has been good after getting an O in Potions.

‘Baby, we’re in public, I can’t just scream about how good you fuck me. There are people eating, for Merlin’s sake’ after he sees a guy talking to you before sitting at the table in the Great Hall. He asks you if you could tell him that he is the only one who could make you come with just his skilled fingers.

‘Don’t think like that ever again, Barty. You are not a lost cause, you aren't. You deserve good things, you deserve the best things, sweetie. You deserve to be loved, and I do. I love you so much Barty, don’t ever think you are not important to me because you are. You mean the world to me’ after he receives a letter from his father asking how a cretin like him was able to find someone who could love him. If he hadn’t begged you to stop after calming down a little you would’ve been in Azkaban with a murder charge by now.

‘Fuck, I love when you do that. Feels amazing, baby’ after he trails a path of kisses down your chest only to focus on the tender flesh of your nipple as he sucks gently, and grazes it with his teeth, teasing you.

‘Harder, baby. I know you like it like this’ while his thrusts become more erratic, stronger and deeper and you can hardly think.

‘You’re cock is perfect, Barty. Fills my mouth so nicely’ while you’re sucking him off, his tip hits your throat and you swallow as the loudest moan leaves his mouth.

‘I told Mulciber that no one can make you scream as loud as I do’

‘You did what ?! Barty !’

‘What ? Is it not true ?’

‘I- of course it’s true, but why did you have to tell him ?’

‘He was being rather cocky about the fact that he could make you scream like, and I quote ‘a bitch’. Then he started using other very disrespectful words to describe you baby, and at that point I had to punch him right in the face, because no one has to even dare to talk about you like that. He is actually lucky my Sectumsempra is not perfect yet, or he would’ve ended way worse. And then I added that little detail. I probably shouldn’t have done it, but I was furious. Do you want me to obliviate him ? I can do that if you want’

‘It’s fine, he needs some salt rubbed on his wounds’

‘Are you sure ?’

‘Yes, baby. And it’s nothing new, I'm sure the entire dorm hears me when you’re fucking me, I can't help it. Now come on my knight in bloody knuckles, let’s go to Madame Pomfrey to get those bruises checked’ you kiss him lightly before heading to the infirmary.

[amomorii]

8th year 🍏⚡

[raphael-angele]

The Gift

POV: It's Regulus' birthday and he's opening presents at the breakfast table.

Regulus: Okay, so far I got a journal that cannot be opened unless I'm the one holding it; thank you, Evan. The Cain's Jawbone book; thank you, Barty. A brand new stationary set; thank you, Pandora. And a silver snake ring that has a needle that injects poison to whoever it punctures; thank you, Dorcas.

Pandora: Happy birthday, Reg.

Evan: Happy birthday, buddy.

Barty: Yeah, yeah, yeah, happy birthday and all that. So which one is your favorite?

Dorcas: You kidding? I win by a mile.

Evan: Oh, I almost forgot *pulls out a small box* This is from Potter.

Dorcas: Why was James Potter giving you a gift for Regulus?

Barty: And why was he with you in the first place?

Evan: Calm down. We bumped into each other in the halls and he asked me to give it to Reg.

Regulus: *opens the box* oh wow.

Pandora: What is it?

Regulus: *shows it to Pandora*

Pandora: Aww, that's so cute.

Barty: What is it?

Pandora: It's like an small pin of the golden snitch but instead of a ball, it's shaped like a star.

Regulus: *reads the note* "Still can't believe I caught you. JP"

Dorcas: Aw, Now that's just romantic

Barty: If Potter wanted to be romantic, he'd realign the stars to say, "I am untterly, undoubtedly, and deeply in love with Regulus Arcturus Black. I say with with sound mind and body. Love, James Potter"

Regulus, putting the pin on his robe: So whose gift is that one? *points to a box*

Everyone:

Regulus: ...no one?

Evan: *inspects* Well, it's addressed to you. And it says Happy Birthday. Maybe it's from your parents?

Regulus: Unlikely. Give it? *takes the box* Really nothing written on here.

Barty: Open it.

Regulus: *opens it and gasps*

Dorcas: What is it?

Regulus: *looks over at the Gryffindor table* Nothing *packs up the gifts, stands and leaves* Thanks for the gifts.

At the Gryffindor table:

Sirius: Hey, the birthday boy himself.

James: Oh, hi, babe.

Regulus: Hey. Sirius, a word? *they move a bit farther away*

Sirius: So what's up? Did you need something?

Regulus: The gift.

Sirius: Yeah? What about it?

Regulus: ...help me put it on?

Sirius: ...*smiles softly* Yeah, okay.

In the bathroom:

Sirius: You okay in there?

Regulus: *comes out of the stall with a roll of bandage*

Sirius: What do you think?

Regulus: *runs his hands through his torso, looks at the mirror and turns to the side*

Sirius: It's not too tight right? I think I hooked it on the right row.

Regulus: *cries*

Sirius: *goes up to him* Hey, hey, c'mon, don't cry. It's okay. What's wrong? Is it too small? Does it hurt?

Regulus: *shakes his head* No. It's perfect.

Sirius: Aww, I'm glad. Feels better right?

Regulus: Mhm.

Sirius: *sighs* I told you to stop using bandages to bind. You're gonna hurt yourself.

Regulus: I didn't have a binder to use.

Sirius: Well now you do. And this is a lot safer and comfier. Right?

Regulus: *nods*

Sirius: Yeah. Now, you have to promise me that you won't wear it for too long. If I find out that you've been binding longer than what's safe, I'm confiscating them. Understand?

Regulus: Mhm. I promise

Sirius: Okay.

Regulus: *hugs Sirius tightly* Love you

Sirius: *kisses the top of his head* Love you, too. Now, let's get you to class.

[slythergirl666]

remus lupin who loves to sneak up and hug you from behind, resting his head on your shoulder to give you sloppy neck kisses. remus lupin who asks you to sing him to sleep. remus lupin who begs you to help him in potions, the only class he's barely passing. remus lupin who always brings you food at the most random times. like you'll be in the middle of a history lesson and he'll just pull out an apple, offering you a bite. remus lupin who ends up doing your homework for you when you ask him for help. remus lupin who always has a book in hand. remus lupin who loves to lay his head in your lap when you're reading in bed together. remus lupin who gets flustered when you want to take care of his scars. remus lupin who loves seeing you in his one of his sweaters.

sirius black. james potter.

[ultravioletbrit]

“important” - Jegulus microfic - @into-the-jeggyverse - 348 words

 

Regulus is sitting in one of his favorite spots in the castle. It’s a secluded alcove behind a tapestry on the fifth floor in a corridor that barely anyone ever uses. He loves it because he can sit and read in peace, and no one could ever find him. 

“Hey Reg.” Remus says casually as he slips behind the tapestry.

“What the fuck, Lupin!” Regulus jumps slightly “How the fuck did you find me?”

“Not important.” Remus brushes him off, as he slips a large piece of parchment into his bag. “Listen, we need to talk about you and James.”

“What about me and James?” Regulus asks feigning ignorance.

“You two need to get your shit together because you’re driving us all insane.” Remus tells him.

“I don’t know what you’re—” Regulus starts.

“Reg, it’s obvious you like him. And it’s obvious he likes you—”

“He doesn’t like me.” Regulus interrupts in a weak voice as he stares down at his lap.

“Regulus,” Remus’ voice softens, and he leans down to try and make eye contact, “There is no way that boy doesn’t like you. I’m pretty sure he’s in love with you. And I know you’re probably just as scared as he is. He’s terrified to do anything and risk losing what you already are to each other. But you could be so much more. And I know you both want that, and you can have it.”

Regulus keeps looking at his lap, he feels his eyes starting to water.

“But what if…?” Regulus trails off, not even wanting to voice his fears out loud.

“He wants what you want. I promise. Talk to him.” Remus whispers firmly as he squeezes Regulus’ shoulder reassuringly.

-------

Meanwhile…   

James’ back is against the stone wall and Barty’s wand is pressed into his throat.

“I swear to Salazar, Potter, if you do not talk to him in the next 24 hours, I will hex you every hour, on the hour until you do! Get your shit together, you’re driving us all insane!” Barty growls at him then unceremoniously drops his wand and walks away without another word.

[maryfromwork]

PSA: Stop pretending Peter doesn’t exist‼️He was a marauder just like the rest of them. There is no “big three” it’s big four; Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs. Plus leaving him in your canon just makes more room for angst.

[mini-anne]

I still can’t get over Harry with “the map must be wrong” and Remus probably having to try so hard not to be like “bitch??? My map??? Wrong??? Nah. But for real… wtf happening… don’t blame it on that piece of perfection, tho.”

[gottabewolfstar]

wonderful commission I made for @lexithwrites ♡

[777heavengirl]

AM - Chapter 1

Snap Out Of It 

Sirius Black x reader Chapter 1/3 Warnings: angst?, smoking, suggestive themes, fwb to lovers word count: 4,684 masterlist

Currently playing: Snap Out Of It by the Arctic Monkeys

Chapters i, ii, iii

Sirius Black does not care. He doesn't care about who you date or hang out with. He does not care that when you smile the corner of your eyes crinkle or that he made you laugh so hard once you actually cried. Sirius does not care that the pink hair clips Remus got you for your birthday matched your lip gloss, as well as the underwear you wore on his birthday. He doesn’t care that you don’t protest when he doesn’t want you spending the night. He doesn’t care that you risked the wrath of Walburga Black by sneaking into the Black household during the summer, just to help heal his wounds as they were so extensive he could not do it alone. He doesn’t care that you always wink at him before your quidditch matches. He doesn’t care that you ditched him to hang out with a no-name blond from-

Sirius didn't want to remember what house he was in, much less his name.

The Gryffindor common room was warm and fairly empty. While the marauders never wasted an opportunity to run around Hogsmeade for a couple of hours, it had been the collective decision, dictated by the foulness of Sirius’s mood, that the lot would stay in the castle today. At least for the first part of the day. It was now 5 in the afternoon.

Remus slapped his book closed, nothing short of exasperated. Although sitting crisscross on the large plush armchair and reading had helped negate the hostile vibrations Sirius had been emitting the past hour, enough was enough.

“If you’re going to pout all day about Y/N’s absence, invite her to Hogsmeade yourself instead next time,”

“Is that where she is? Hadn’t noticed,”

“You are a terrible liar Pads please spare us,” James groaned from the ground, his back against the bottom half of the armchair Remus sat on.

“I don’t know why you think I give a rat’s ass where she is or who she’s with right now,” Sirius knew he was really stretching it now, his tone hadn’t exactly come across as calm and nonchalant. Quite the opposite, his brows had furrowed his face into a scowl and Remus had taken this as his sign to leave, getting up from his chair, James sluggishly crawling into the now empty spot.

“Y/N is not yours Sirius,” Peter frowned at the boy. Sirius’s clenched jaw and hard stare did nothing but spur Peter into rolling his eyes. “You don’t get to be upset when you insist there is nothing between the two of you and then expect her to be at your beck and call,” Peter swiftly got up after, not wanting to even hear what Sirius had to say. They were best mates, but that didn’t mean that any of the marauders wouldn’t tell Sirius Black when he was being an asshole. Peter grabbed his coat from the back of the couch, as he and Remus made a beeline to the common room door, no doubt to make their way to Hogsmeade, enough of the day had been wasted. The fat lady's singing, as she so often fancied doing, perforated the room briefly as the boys opened and closed the door.

“Seriously mate,” James shook his head. ‘You need to snap out of it”. Sirius looked up from his spot on the couch, his legs could now stretch with Peter’s absence and he took the cushion Peter had been hugging to put between his back and the arm of the couch. He couldn't help but stare at the ceiling. James started speaking mindlessly about anything, really, the new prank they wanted to try out, if he should ask Lily Evans on a second date or if it was too soon? I reckon she enjoyed it though. James knew quite well Sirius hadn't been truly listening, but he didn't mind. Not really anyway. He knew his friend quite well, he knew the feelings the boy was trying to repress were bound to bubble up sometime. He had caught Sirius staring at you the entire time you had been at Hogwarts. His eyes trailed after you since you were 11. Since you met on the train.

It wasn't like James didn't know what had been happening recently either. You had been attached at the hip since the ripe age of 5. He was your closest confidant, you joked you were actually cousins. Siblings. He had known about the spirals of conflicted feelings you had fallen on during your fifth year. Much to your own dismay, you liked Sirius Black.

James had a low-key way of encouraging it, even knowing the casanova tendencies Sirius had started to display. The way you bounced off of each other, the jokes, the irony, the stolen glances. The way Sirius's touch always seemed to drift towards you, small pushes after jokes, sweeping you off the ground as you landed, snitch still in your grip. You'd have to be blind to not see the chemistry the two of you had.

Maybe Sirius needed glasses.

James did, however, regret encouraging you. Since April of your fifth year til now, February of your sixth, you had been tangled in Sirius's bed sheets. But not his heart. He wouldn't allow it. And you acted like you didn't either. James held you a good couple of times, as the sobs broke your chest and endless tears poured from your eyes. It isn't his fault Jamie, promise me you won't be mad at him. He couldn't exactly bring himself to let your heartbreak roll off his back, but he didn't want to expose your feelings. So he kept his mouth shut and went to crazy lengths to make sure Sirius wasn't seeing anyone else. Pulling Sirius into crazy unprompted schemes, setting up the girl of the week with someone else, and putting all sorts of spells to lock their door during parties. This one had left them locked out and sleeping in the common room quite a few times. Remus hadn't been happy.

James had tried his best.

Sirius continued to stare up, eyes glazed over as he tried to count the cracks in the ceiling of the common room. He wondered if you were having fun. If the unnamed blond made you laugh. Had you laughed to the point of tears? He doubted it, he looked a bit dull.

Sirius Black did not care that when he asked you if you were going on a date, you blushed, waving off his statement like it was a cloud of smoke.

-

You didn’t want to piss off Sirius. That actually wasn’t the goal at all, because who the bloody hell cares what he thinks? Yet you couldn’t help but think of him while you sat in Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop.

He'd hate this place.

The tea shop was a cute place, it frankly was. It was a rather twee location, filled to the brim with bows and frills. You stared holes into the lacy napkins and sugar bowls. You didn't particularly dislike it. It was cute and you had grown to cherish the pinks and bows, that came with what some defined as femininity. But you enjoyed such things in moderation. And in secret. A lacy napkin stuck out slightly from your small handbag pushed down in a hurry. It would be nice for your scrapbook.

It was the date spot for the hopeless romantics. Or the pushy ones too. You didn’t peg Mr. Jacob Brown as one to frequent such places, but you wouldn’t say no to a free meal with a handsome man.

You weren't usually into blondes though.

You shared the same table as him for Potions. Slytherin and Gryffindor were mixed in this class and you had a feeling Slughorn was regretting this fact as the term trudged along. Jacob was not what you expected. He was one of the more quiet ones, if you squinted he reminded you a bit of Peter. Demeanor wise at least. Jacob's kind eyes found it hard to look straight at yours as he caught you after class, you wouldn't have heard him calling you if he hadn't been in front of you. You could feel Sirius's eyes burning holes into the back of your head as he wanted at the classroom's door while you talked with the tall boy. You opted to ignore him as you listened to Jacob stutter out how he'd be delighted if you would be up for going to Hogsmeade with him on Saturday. You didn't need to say yes though,

You did.

His tall stature, golden blond hair, and tanned skin quite contrasted not only your dear friend Peter but a certain boy you were trying painfully hard not to think about. Jacob was quiet and kind, with a knack for exploding whatever was brewing in his cauldron often. But when you met up with him at Hogsmeade, the frigid February air bitting your cheeks, it was like he had come loose, his usually tense demeanor relaxed and warm. He complimented your outfit quite thoughtfully too.

You wondered if Sirius would like it too.

"Did you hear me Y/N?" You blinked, fuck.

"Merlin no, I'm sorry Jacob I got distracted," he lightly chuckled at the apologetic twist in your face "The frills y'know?" you said with a circular motion of your hand. The boy couldn't help but laugh.

"I was just asking if you liked your dessert, you've barely touched it" his lips spread into a small smile as you glanced at the abandoned oversugared pastry sitting in front of you. It wasn't bad, but much like this place, the cloying taste was sticking to your gums.

"No, I did! But maybe we should've shared it I feel like I'm going to go into a diabetic coma," you let out a laugh, standing up, prompting him to do the same. "Do you want to maybe go for a walk?"

His lips split into a wide smile as he dropped the change of galleons onto the table.

"You're a blessing, let's go,"

Maybe this would go better than you had thought.

-

"So?" James wiggled his eyebrows, throwing a look over his shoulder briefly, catching a certain Slytherin staring from the other side of the hall. Jacob turned as red as the Gryffindor table runner. "How was your date with the shy lad over there?"

James could feel Sirius glaring at him from his spot next to you. He hadn't left your side since you came back, an easy smile on your face much to his dismay. You had come just in time for dinner, meeting the boys as they came down.

"it was really good," a smile broke on your face, your hand still felt warm with the ghost of Jacob's. You couldn't help but contrast this new boy and Sirius. The way he asked to hold your hand, Sirius only ever threw his arm around your shoulders, the way he seemed sincere and upfront with his intentions, the way he complimented you at every turn. Genuinely too, his big brown eyes showing nothing but pure kindness.

You struggled to find a time Sirius had genuinely complimented you. One that wasn't from in between his sheets.

"Well don't just spill it all at once," You couldn't help but roll your eyes at James. Impatient fellow wasn't he?

"Well, he took me to Madam Puddifoot's" a collective groan came out of all the boys' mouths.

"So cheesy-" Peter laughed at the thought,

"He's a bloody wanker if you ask me, reject him while we're ahead," Sirius mumbled as he popped a grape into his mouth, regaining his failing appetite. You shook your head, cheeks tinted red. Of course, Sirius would say that. You couldn't even imagine him in that tea shop, much less even considering that you may have liked it. You couldn't help but frown. Although you had a good time, you secretly wished you were out with Sirius instead. You wished he'd compliment you, you wished he'd open the door for you and ask you your favorite flavor of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor bean. You wished he'd hold your hand, you wished he'd kiss your cheek as you said goodbyes. You wished he liked you enough to be bashful at the thought of asking you out.

You wished Sirius would just ask you out.

"Well, I'll have you know I quite enjoyed it," Sirius suddenly didn't feel hungry again, pushing his plate away. "after the abusively sweet dessert caught up with me, we went for a walk," Remus couldn't help but push the plate of food back in front of Sirius, giving him a pointed look.

"We talked a whole lot, he asked me stuff I don't think anyone has ever asked about me before like really detailed stuff," you couldn't help but pause as you thought about it, his interest in the things you liked, your favorite quidditch team, what you thought of your divination class.

"He asked to hold my hand-"

"Who the hell does that?" you failed to notice the kick James sent into Sirius's shins. He kicked back.

"I just haven't had a good time like that in a while, he was so genuine" James and Peter smiled widely, Remus slowly breaking into a smile as well as they all stared at your face. It was obvious you were happy, the way you hadn't stopped repressing a smile, the small bite of your lip as you thought about it more.

James wasn't going to let Sirius ruin it. As Sirius opened his mouth to speak James stepped on his foot as hard as he could.

"We are all very happy it went well," Sirius let out through the pain, and immediately James took back his foot.

"Thanks, Black," you hadn't called him that in ages. Sirius felt his heart clench, as well as his throat. He'd prefer if James stepped on him again.

You didn't last much longer at the Great Hall, waving them goodbye as you went up with Lily and Mary, spilling all the details to them as well.

"You're the bloody wanker Padfoot," James hissed, Sirius rolled his eyes as he pushed his plate of food away. Remus rolled his eyes too. It was like they were taking care of a child at this point.

Sirius stayed quiet, as he rested his cheek on his hand. Eyes looking for the blond on the far side of the Great Hall. He still didn't know which house to look in.

"Don't do anything to the poor boy" Remus frowned, Sirius always had something to bite back with. Always some quip, some remark. But he stayed silent.

Sirius stared blankly at Remus. He didn't know why. But the truth was that he wanted to beat the boy to a pulp. He didn't have a reason. You weren't his, he made sure of that. The kilometer-long distance he put between you and his heart. He didn't have any reason to be jealous, it wasn't his place. There had to be something wrong with the guy.

When he broke your heart you'd run back to Sirius.

-

Sirius didn't care. He didn't care that he could hear your giggles from the other side of the potions classroom as you helped the blond boy. He didn't care that you had disappeared the last two weekends to hang out with him. He heard from Remus you were trying to teach him how to fly. Imbecile.

He didn't care that he hadn't kissed you in two and a half weeks. Not since the day the boy had asked you out. Sirius Black was perfectly fine and did not at all care that you ran to hug Jacob after your latest victory. The boy had been waiting for you at the changing room's door even if it had been a win against his own house. Leaving Sirius standing in the middle of the pitch, being dragged inside by James. Sirius didn't care that you were missing from the victory party thrown later that night. He saw your names floating together on the map, they mocked him as he tried to swallow the knot at his throat. The rest of the night felt like a blur, like the entire world flew around him and he remained still.

In the two weeks since the date, you had drifted so far from his grasp. He missed the smell of your hair, you always smelled vaguely of vanilla. It was spicy and intoxicating and he could never get enough of it. He missed your laughter when he made some stupid joke. He missed having you in his arms. He missed how soft and supple your skin was. He missed the way your lips would curl up in a smirk when he said something vaguely snarky, or when they roped you into some scheme that would definitely land the lot of you in detention. The way you rambled on about constellations and everything else that crossed your mind when you sat at the top of the astronomy tower. The way you would rip away the occasional cigarette from his mouth, talking about these not being the muggle habits he should be picking up, you'd always take a quick drag before putting it out.

He didn't care that he felt a pit at the bottom of his stomach for two weeks.

"Do you think he'll ask me to be his girlfriend?" you felt juvenile even asking, your words had been barely a whisper, they hung heavy in the common room as Lily, Alice, and Frank as well as the marauders all lounged around. It was fairly late, so the place lay otherwise empty. Your arms hugged your legs as you sat in the far corner of the couch, staring directly into the fire not wanting to see anyone's face. You usually were overjoyed at spending time like this, with all of your friends. Alice and Frank's relationship had brought the girls closer to the marauders as Frank was already a close friend. You no longer had to divide your time between your friends and James got to be around Lily.

James was delighted, of course, patting Frank's back with an I knew we were friends for a reason Frankie dear, the first time the girls stuck around to hang out.

But you had felt a tension lately, even with Lily and the rest of the girls. Like they were hesitant about your blooming relationship. Like they all knew something you didn't. Like they were waiting for some other shoe to drop. The smiles Lily shot your way as you talked about the boy and how well he treated you, were the same type of smile she used to give Marlene when she was delusional about some girl last term and didn't have the heart to tell her. James looked at you like you might break any minute, nervous to speak about your romantic affair. Sirius was completely avoiding you. You were scared you were reading too much into the compliments, into the attention you were receiving.

The tension came to a close when James spoke, his body was taking up 90% of the couch you were on, and he lay on his side. You knew his eyes stared into Lily's curled form. His foot poked yours as he spoke lowly,

"What makes you think he wouldn't?"

"Well-"

"None of that," Alice spoke up from Frank's arms on the opposite couch. He slowly fed jellybeans into her mouth as she spoke, the varying flavors making her face scrunch up every so often. "you're so lovely, and if he can't see that and commit then I'll blast him to hell myself," Lily hummed in agreement from her spot on one of the armchairs, sleep tugging at her eyelids.

"Cheers to that," Sirius spoke from his spot on the carpet, spread like a starfish in front of the fire. James wanted to kick his head in the fire. Sirius would probably welcome it at this point. He felt a knot form in his throat at your words.

Peter snored from the armchair next to Lily's.

"There's no reason to think he won't Y/N," Remus said softly from his spot also on the floor, his back resting on the front of the sofa seat, directly in front of you. You carded your fingers through his hair, and he shot you a small smile. You felt pathetic. You stared into the fire.

It wasn't as if Jacob hadn't been clear. He was really into you, and every second that he was free he'd find an excuse to be around you. Even when his housemates looked at him like he was mad. You felt a swirl of emotions clawing at your throat, almost to the point that you couldn't breathe. You wondered what Sirius thought. You hadn't talked in so long.

You almost felt bad at taking every ounce of attention Jacob gave you, you felt terrible. Like you were using him. Godric were you using him?

Were you using this poor boy to get over Sirius?

No! you liked him, he was kind and he never smirked nor got under your skin. He didn't laugh at you or drive you up the wall with his winks and smirks. He was nice and kind. He was kind yes. Probably what you liked best, one of his best qualities. And let's not forget how agreeable his face was, his strong features and dirty blond hair. And his parents were Americans! You didn't hear that often…

You thought back to December. When Sirius read to you in French, with your head on his chest and his fingers running through your hair. The grounds had been covered in white, cold seeping in through the windows. The words on the page, although foreign to you, rolled off his tongue with ease. Sirius had joked that this would be your Christmas present. He chuckled as you covered your face when he took out a little red box from his bedside table.

You fiddled with the thin golden bracelet he gave you that Christmas.

You felt like you were fighting back tears.

-

"Thought you'd be in love and giggling on some corner of the castle," Your feet dangled from the top of the astronomy tower, and although the security of the metal bars made sure you weren't going to fall, the lack of ground under your feet made you feel at the mercy of the air. Your fingerless gloves did little to stop the biting cold and your fingertips looked pale but you moved them nevertheless, taking the lit cigarette out of your mouth. Your large jacket and the sweater you had stolen from their dorm helped a bit, but you had sat unmoving for a good thirty minutes. You briefly thought of a professor finding you frozen in place the next morning. "I also remember you saying we shouldn't be picking these habits up hm?"

Sirius sat on the floor next to you, feet also dangling through the metal bars. His own jacket was zipped up to the top and the black leather material shone under the light of the moon. This was a different jacket from the one he used when he rode around on his stupid muggle motorbike. It was big and the leather looked soft and worn. His pajama bottoms couldn't be providing him with enough heat though… That wasn't really your problem, was it?

He took the cigarette from your fingers taking a drag.

"Not like you ever listen to me Black,"

"I hate it when you call me that," Sirius passed it back to you, his voice low. The cloud emanating from your lips turned and mixed with Sirius's in front of you. The crescent moon highlighted the swirls of smoke dancing in the air.

"And I hate smoking-"

"Then why are we here?" He hummed as he took the cigarette from you, taking another drag and putting it out on the side of the tower.

"Why are you here?" for the first time since he had arrived you turned to look at him. He did not turn to look back. His side profile was enviable. His defined nose, the plump lips, the way his pearly pale skin contrasted against his coal black hair. It was shorter than usual. His mom had maimed his hair during the two days he passed in his household during Christmas. He was trying desperately to grow it out again. The moon seemed to make him almost black and white. It was like watching a monochromatic film, and you were hooked on it.

You thought of the brown tinge his hair had during the summer months.

"Get bored of the blond yet?" you scoffed, taking out the pack of Player's No 6 cigarettes from your jacket pocket.

"He has a name, not that it matters to you" The ribs of the wheel on the lighter scratched at your thumb as you flicked it quickly, but the flickering warmth made your thumb feel like it was finally shedding a layer of ice. You lit your second cigarette of the night.

You really did hate smoking. You didn't answer his question.

Sirius moved his hand to take the cigarette from your mouth, as you let out the smoke. You moved his hand away, offering the pack instead.

He took the container in his hand and chucked it through the air. You watched with wide eyes as it disappeared through the air, the shadow of night covering whatever hint of where they may have landed. He took the cigarette from your lips and took a drag.

"What is up your ass Black?" you snarled at him, you felt your lips quiver as he finally looked at you one of his insufferable smirks on his face.

"You shouldn't be smoking love, it ain't good for ya," he took another drag and offered you the cigarette once again.

You felt like you were going to blow a fuse. You brought your legs back from the brink, tucking them in and using the bars as leverage to swing yourself up. Your fingers clutched the lighter in your pocket tightly. Sirius stared at the spot you had been sitting at.

"You're such a prick Sirius Black," he finally turned to look at you "You can never let me be happy, you won't even let me have my cigarettes,"

"come on love-" you scoffed, you could feel the hot tears welling up in your eyes.

"Dont 'love' me, you're so selfish" You could see his jaw clench, his chest rising as he took a deep breath in surprise. "go find yourself someone else to satisfy your needs, you will not keep me in this vicious loop any longer,"

You made to leave but turned back "His name is Jacob by the way, and I am not in love with him but he doesn't make me cry Sirius," he could see the trail of tears down your cheeks, the glow of the moon reflecting off of them. It was like you were crying starlight. He had never hated his name falling from your lips more than he did this moment.

"And that's all you do," he felt the bile crawling up his throat,

"You make me cry."

[antsrust]

Hockey Player!James x Figure Skater!Regulus

These took me so long but I absolutely love how they turned out. I have a whole fic about them planned out in my head but I cannot be bothered to actually write it lol

[juleswritesstuff]

Saw a post that said "James' thighs are meant to be ridden" and, well...enjoy 🤭

james potter x reader

warnings: smut

It was honestly so unfair.

They were there at anyone’s display, exposed, and under everyone’s eyes. Something that you would've liked to keep only for you, but you knew it would've been rather impossible.

And it was so fucking unfair. 

James' thighs were to die for.

They were plump and firm, muscle flexing with every movement as he ran on the pitch screaming orders to pass the Quaffle or informing his team mates on other strategies that might’ve been useful during the game. Inches and inches of soft, smooth and tanned skin that made your mouth water and your head spin. 

What did he need all those muscles for ?

He flew on a broom for Merlin’s sake, he didn’t need all of that.

“I really don’t know what you’re on about. There are some muggle athletes that have thighs twice as big as his, why are you drooling- oh my God Y/n, stop eyefucking him right now or so Godric help me”

Well, James was your boyfriend. You had every right to eyefuck him, thank you very much.

Apparently Marlene didn’t think the same things you thought when you even as much as caught the smallest glimpse of James’ delicious looking thighs clad in a pair of shorts during Quidditch practice.

And, well, she was right. His thighs weren't enormously big, you too had seen bigger, but they were muscular nonetheless. They were firm, and sturdy and they made you feel so good when they flexed just right and the perfectly smooth skin made contact with your crotch, sending bolts of pleasure down your spine and to your core.

Because, yeah, James wasn't stupid and he definitely noticed the way you gawked at him when he wore shorts or pants that were a bit more tight-fitting than usual.

The smirk on his face became even more mischievous, pleased even, when he felt your eyes on him.

“You know you can -ah, try if you want to, right ?” he asked you once.

He was sitting on his bed, dorm room empty, Sirius, Remus and Peter nowhere to be seen. You were plopped on his lap, one leg on each side, straddling him with your hands fisting his hair lightly, just how you knew he liked it, your lips slotted in a filthy kiss.

Tongues swirling and teeth biting teasingly as you rocked back and forth right on his taint, feeling the outline of his cock through his shorts, filling more and more with each roll of your hips.

He stopped just for a second, enough time to ask the question through broken whimpers.

“Try what ?” you asked back, taking his bottom lip between your teeth to nibble lightly, swiping your tongue on it right after.

He didn't answer, apparently too lost in the gentle friction of your groin against his, but not lost enough to not be able to grab your waist gently, lifting you up like you were deadweight, and maneuvering your position until you were straddling his left thigh, rather than his waist.

As soon as you sat on it fully a moan ripped through your mouth.

Oh, that felt delicious.

The firm flesh and tight, flexed muscles making contact with your core made your eyes roll.

You still had your underwear on, not even able to fully undress as soon as your mouth connected with James’, but if it felt that good with fabric in the way, even though fine and now completely drenched, you couldn't even imagine how it would feel if that little piece of cloth disappeared.

Just the idea made your insides melt.

So, logically, you took your panties off as fast as you could.

And so did he with his boxers.

When your bare core made contact with the tanned skin you almost came on the spot.

You started to rock back and forth without even realizing it, shocks of pleasure traveling through your whole body.

“Fuck, baby look at you” James let out in a breath, his voice less whimpery, but still strained. His eyes were adoring and veiled with lust.

“How-oh, fuck, how did you know ?” you asked, your arms resting on his shoulders for support and your head tilted back after a particularly good flex of his muscle made you see stars, broken moans falling off your lips.

“You're as subtle as a Bludger in the face, love” he said with an airy laugh that died on his throat as soon as your knee came in contact with his cock, now rock-hard and leaking pre-cum.

You wet your lips unconsciously.

Oh, to feel that familiar weight in your mouth as your head bobbed up and down slowly, teasing him with your tongue.

Another time.

“Am I ? And here I thought I was being discreet” you said, the sarcasm in your tone broken by the little sounds of pleasure that kept rolling out of your mouth.

You couldn't help it, it felt so good.

He felt so good.

“I could feel your eyes all over me, my legs and my ass. So much about being-shit, discreet” 

“It's not my fault -ah, fuck, do that again please, you're built like a goodamn statue, Jamie”

“Oh, am I now ?” he asked teasingly, but he couldn't keep a string of low groans from escaping his throat.

“You know you are, stop acting all coy” you said in a whisper after a particular roll of your hips had hit just right, exactly where you needed it.

He pulled you closer to him and started to kiss your shoulder, your collarbone, your neck, every fucking centimeter of your body until he reached your lips and he dived in like a starved man.

“You're the one who looks majestic, baby” he whispered directly on your mouth, your lips still touching “fuck, look at you. Riding my thigh so well. Tell me, why didn't we do this sooner ? How could you deprive me of such a sight ? I know you wanted to baby” he started to stroke his cock lazily, his eyes taking in your figure as you moved sinfully.

His words made you moan again, and again.

His hands on your hips guiding you gently as you rocked back and forth slowly, trying to drag the pleasure as much as you could.

“I- it was embarrassing” you cried in a whimper when his mouth latched to one of your nipples, sucking gently, tenderly, before grazing lightly with his teeth, making you hiss.

“Didn't want to make a fool of myself, if you said no” you explained as rationally as you possibly could with the amount of pleasure you were feeling.

“As if I could ever say no to you, Y/n. You know I'll do anything you ask me, baby. I would crawl on the floor right fucking now if you wanted me to” he breathed right on your skin, eyes hazy and filled with lust, but still glued to yours.

“Would you ?” you asked as your hands found place through his hair, tugging lightly, cradling dark brown locks between your fingers. Your hips were still moving relentlessly, swaying in a sultry rhythm that made your veins fill with fire.

“You know I would. I’d do anything for you” he said before kissing you again, till both your lips were red and bruised and you were in dire need of oxygen.

“Ah, fuck. Of course you would, you’re such a good boy, aren’t you ?” you said with a grin and in seconds you got to witness James’ expression crumbling, eyes wide and mouth agape as a sob fell out of his gorgeous lips.

“Holy shit, you know how that gets me, baby” he said, breathless. The grip on your hips tightened slightly.

Of course you knew. His eagerness for praises never went unnoticed by you.

“Do you know why I love to say it so much, Jamie ?” you asked as you stopped moving on his thigh only to get back to you initial position, right over his now completely filled out cock.

You took it in your hand delicately, stroking lazily, feeling the velvety soft skin and the little veins scattered along his length.

He hissed through his teeth and looked at you with pleading eyes.

“Why ? he asked in a broken moan as you kept moving your hand up and down.

When you stopped, it was only to hover right above him, aligning his length directly at your entrance.

Then you tipped forward, lips directly on the shell of his ear.

“Beacuse when I say it you always fuck me so good that i’m barely able to think” you whispered, and after a second you were sitting fully on his cock, bottoming out head to base.

He let out a groan and threw his head back banging it to the wall, but he didn't seem to feel the pain, probably because your slick warmth was all he could think about at the moment. His head was spinning, his breath ragged and he couldn't even form a coherent word.

You rolled your eyes, feeling all of him inside of you. The tip of his cock buried so deep inside you that it caressed your cervix with every single breath he took.

“Fuck-fuck, you’re so fucking tight you’re squeezing me, love” he said once his brain started to, barely, work again. 

You took a couple more seconds to adjust and get used to the, much more than welcome, intrusion, but, not even a moment after, you started to sway your hips again.

The breath got knocked out of your lungs, your eyes rolled back so far in your skull that, if you weren’t literally fucking yourself on the best dick you had ever taken, you would’ve been concerned.

James’ hands found home on your ass, gripping so hard you were sure there would've been bruises by the next day.

A souvenir you were eager to see.

You bounced up and down mercilessly.

The coil in your belly started to grow stronger and stronger.

But your legs were tired, almost ready to give out and you let out a broken sob at the thought.

But James, wonderful, amazing, handsome, sexy James knew you like the back of his hand and he noticed.

Of course he noticed.

In a heartbeat hands were on your hips, stilling your movement. You wanted to protest. You wanted to tell him that you couldn't stop now. He’d been such a good boy letting you ride his thigh, he deserved to come.

You couldn't even utter a word before James’ hips snapped up and he was buried deep inside of you again, filling you up and leaving you breathless.

“It’s ok, baby. I got it from here” he said in a whisper before he started pounding inside of you like a fucking machine.

His thrusts were hard and deep, making you see stars, planets and entire galaxies.

Your brain was foggy, clouded with lust and the sounds of your and James’s moans blended together.

“James-Jamie” you whimpered. You were close, you were so close you could feel it in your veins, the fire getting so hot, scorching even.

You just needed- 

“Come baby, you’ve been such a good girl for me” 

The coil in your tummy snapped, your brain went blank and a drowned out moan fell from your lips as your head tilted back in the most breath-taking of pleasures.

James got his release too. Thick ribbons of white painting your insides as you helped each other ride out your orgasms.

You surged forward to kiss him lazily, languidly, without a care in the world. You nibbled at his lower lip, always so plump and inviting and he let out a soft chuckle.

“Merlin, you really like sucking on my lips” he said, bumping his nose with yours in a cute gesture.

“I like to suck on a lot of things of yours” you mused with a grin. His eyes widened a bit and you could feel his cock twitch, suddenly interested again.

“Shit, baby, you can't say things like that when I'm still inside of you” he groaned in a pained voice, burying his head in the crook of your neck.

“So, no round two ?” you asked, acting all innocent, but you had a smirk on your lips that he, still hiding on your collarbone, couldn't see.

He lifted his head so fast that you were afraid he would've broken his neck.

“I would love nothing more baby, but aren't your legs tired ?” he asked, while tucking a strand of your hair, messy and a bit matted thanks to him, behind your ear, stroking your cheeks with the pads of his fingers while he was there.

“Oh, yeah. I can't even feel them anymore thanks to you, your amazing thighs and your glorious cock” 

He laughed, tipping his head back with a smile that could outshine the sun.

Warmth spread inside your chest and the corners of your lips turned up, mirroring him.

“My ‘glorious cock’ huh ?” he said, his shoulders still shaking with laughter “is it that good ?” he asked, lifting an eyebrow with a cheeky grin.

You bent forward, kissing his lips sweetly.

“The best” you whispered right on his mouth.

“Just my dick ? Nothing else ?” he questioned, his hands on your hips as his thumbs drew imaginary circles on your skin and his eyes flicked to you with a mischievous glint.

“Ah, and your thighs of course. How could I forget ?” you said, teasing him.

You really hadn't noticed, but he kept his glasses on the whole time. That meant that he got to savor every single blissed-out roll of your eyes, bit of your lips, scrunch of your eyebrows, and mouth parted in pleasure.

It honestly made you a little giddy inside.

You laughed when a pout appeared on his beautiful features.

“You're not funny, you know ? I knew you just wanted me for my body” he said, but his little smile was teasing and it started to get bigger and bigger.

“I actually wanted you for your ‘O’ in DADA, but, sure, that works too” you said teasing further.

“What ?!” he asked, actually bewildered “really ?!”

You rolled your eyes, fondness gushing out from all your pores.

Merlin, why did he have to be so cute ?

“No, James. I love you because you're one of the best people I know. You're nice, funny, charismatic, smart -well that only sometimes- and you have the biggest heart. You're good. You're so good, baby. Your smoking hot body and your incredible ability to fuck me stupid are just bonuses” you said as your hands cradled through his hair softly.

Then you left a kiss on his cheek, on his nose, his temple, the high part of his cheekbone, until you reached his lips where he proceeded to melt.

He wrapped his arms around you and brought you closer, seeming to forget that he was still balls deep inside of you.

You let out a small hiss as you shuddered at his little movement.

"Careful, baby. Sensitive” you said a bit breathy.

“Fuck, sorry. I'm sorry, love. Do you want me to-”

“Don't you even dare move” you told him, keeping him close to you. Arms looped around his neck as you faced him.

A confused frown settled on his forehead.

“I don't wanna go yet. I like staying like this” you confessed. Your fingers ran all over his face, tracing every nook and angle.

The corner of his eyes, his brows, his nose, cheeks. And finally his lips.

“But your legs-”

“Oh, don't worry, they’re just a bit numb. After we catch our breath a little, I want you to make them fucking shake” 

He stilled for a second, and then he was on your lips again ,hungry and even more eager than before, placing a kiss on them after every word.

“You” kiss “are” kiss “so” kiss “goddamn” kiss “perfect”.

Let's just say your ability to walk was severely compromised for a couple of days.