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rdng1230 · 1 month

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Sal Deluca Meta

Okie dokie here we go. Just remember y'all asked for this.

Here are some repeated talking points I’ve seen about Sal and why I think most of them are ignoring certain contexts or misattributing things to Sal that were said/done by somebody else. Also just general thoughts about our little mook.

Hen Begins

That Sal was a raging racist/sexist/homophobic.

Let’s deal with the first one first. Is he a member of the white boys club? Absolutely. He makes no effort to include Hen and doesn’t really acknowledge her at all until he’s complimenting her for her skills at the end of the episode. This is OBVIOUSLY not good. He should’ve been kinder and more welcoming to her. But the only one who specifically makes negative/mean comments about Hen is Gerrard and Tommy. Literally the only thing you could even interpret that way is him saying “for real?” to Gerrard’s diversity hire comment and the fact that he drops the pick axe or whatever the hell that metal thing was on the floor along with everybody else besides Chim. Not great, but also with what we know about how other rookies are treated even by Hen herself, I don’t think any of this behavior falls into “irredeemable racist monster” Buck chased Ravi with a chainsaw for christ sake.

Ok now the sexism. He actually stares daggers at Gerrard for the entirety of his stupid “waste of taxpayer money/women won’t be able to rescue my guys” spiel. Like the camera specifically focuses on Sal looking pissed as hell. Another thing I’ve heard falsely said is that after Gerrard storms off, Sal/Tommy follow him. That’s not true. They do get up and leave but they actually leave in the ass opposite direction. Sal’s face when he signals to Tommy to get up reads to me as “let’s get the hell away from the fallout of that grossness.” not “I agree with what that dinosaur just said.” But I also realize people can interpret that moment differently.

I think the sexist reading largely comes from the Kristen Stewart conversation. And come on, This is the lesbian website, if we start dinging people for finding Kristen Stewart attractive, we’re all going down. Plus again, Buck was STEALING EMERGENCY EQUIPMENT TO GO GET LAID AND HE’S EVERYBODY’S FAV SO I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT. We see Sal kind of ignore Hen but also agree with her at the same time during this exchange. Again a case of Sal not really acknowledging Hen but not attacking her either. Go and look at his face when Tommy says that NY bitchiness comment. Sal does not look at all happy with him. Most of the time when anyone is being actively mean Sal looks pissed off, not approving.

Ok now the homophobia thing. And it's at this point I’m going to bring up the idea that some characters seem bad/good not based on their actions but on whose perspective we’re viewing those actions from. I see this being a problem with several characters. Most notably Taylor Kelly. But that's a whole other post.

Sal’s team Jacob comment is homophobic and gross but it's also 1) 2009 and 2) directed at someone who he clearly knows incredibly well and who we KNOW gives as good as he gets. I easily could’ve seen this interaction reversed with Tommy saying that to Sal because that's who they are and how their friendship works. But because we’re seeing this from Hen’s perspective it's another thing that makes her feel isolated and othered. And again THAT IS NOT GOOD SAL SHOULD NOT BE DOING THAT. But I don’t think Sal at all said that with the intention of putting Hen down, it very clearly reads to me as Sal teasing/riling Tommy up as they always have. Now obviously the harm still hits even if the intent wasn’t present. But I think if we can forgive Tommy for comments that were MEANT to be mean, then we can forgive Sal for comments that were just him fucking around with his best friend of several years.

That Sal was the ringleader or Gerrard’s right hand man

Does Sal have a sort of in charge vibe? Yeah absolutely. But very notably the only thing he actually initiates is the olive branch. It’s him that offers a hand to Hen and says nice job and you’re good at what you do. I also will die on the hill that the hemorrhoid complaint was his. Chim would definitely say that but not in an official report, Tommy would definitely bad mouth Gerrard, but not like that. Now who is known for kind of cruder language and a short fuse and absolutely would put that down in an official report? Sal motherfucking Deluca that’s who.

One notable thing that I find interesting is that Hen herself distinguishes Gerrard’s behavior from the rest of the team's. She definitely gives them hell during her big speech but when Chim does dishes with her she specifically says men like him not men like them. Just something I realized on my most recent rewatch.

To summarize, the only real thing Sal did that was unique to him (because they all failed to stick up for Hen, yes even Chim. Chim was nice to her but he never actually stood up for her to Gerrard’s face. He tried to redirect the conversation a couple times but that was it.) was the Kristen stewart comments and the Team Jacob comment. I would argue Tommy’s comments in Chimney begins and his NY bitchiness comment in Hen Begins are way more targeted, hateful, and fucking rude. (said with all love because we know Tommy had a bunch of growth and change and became the man we all know and adore.) IMO nothing in Hen begins that Sal says/does is as bad as what Tommy did/said.

Bobby Begins Again

Ok another reason why I don’t think Sal is this irredeemable sexist/racist/homophobic pig is WHY ON EARTH WOULD HEN STAND UP FOR HIM IF HE WAS???!?!?!? Hen is THE FIRST PERSON TO CALL OUT THAT CRAP even from the first episode she says something like “why is that always the first instinct with you whiteboy macho types?” So why why why why would she stand up for Sal if he hadn’t shown any improvement in that area in the now 7 years minimum that she’s worked with him. Answer: she fucking wouldn’t. Ok moving on.

The Bobby stuff

So remember how I said perspective changes everything? This is the major reason why. We as the audience love Bobby and know intimately the struggles he’s faced, so we’re naturally going to be angered by anyone who is antagonistic towards him. The thing is Sal doesn’t know ANY of that. This is what Sal knows about Bobby.

He’s from somewhere in middle America and has never worked in a MAJOR American city like LA/NYC. That’s it. He COMPLETELY ACCURATELY I MIGHT ADD predicts that anybody with that background will struggle to adapt to the specifics of LA. It’s Sal that has to pick up Bobby’s slack as he adjusts, calling out the shots at the tree trimmer call, taking the initiative with Maurice even though Bobby does ultimately do the saving. (Which Sal actually seems impressed by btw.) Bobby still can’t even read the city map when they pull up to the restaurant fire call.

Now imagine you’re Sal. First you had Gerrard as captain, who (I think it's fair to say) you DID NOT LIKE. One of the things he did was put down firefighters who disobeyed orders by rescuing people. We saw this with the “fetching a tide” call and with saving the boy in the submerged car. Hen disobeyed orders but showed real skill as a firefighter. And all she got for her troubles was being berated by her Captain.

Ok then after Gerrard you have an interim captain that seems like a decent dude, but he leaves and for a while you have a revolving door of retiring brass that are checked out, behind the times, or just generally disengaged. You become used to filling in as captain and get actually pretty damn good at managing the team. (I say this because Sal leads the team several times in BBA and nobody looks at all like this is a new development) Then they finally pick a nobody who has never worked in a proper city before and to you he’s just the newest asshole that will probably screw up and get someone killed. Sal has no idea about the challenges or traumas Bobby has had to face, just like we have no idea what might have happened in the 5+ years between HB and BBA. Sal has probably MANY REASONS not to trust Bobby that we don’t know about.

So how would you feel after you’ve successfully rescued a teenage boy’s life, if your new captain who you’ve known for like a day and still doesn’t even know how to get the engine to calls on time, calls YOU stupid for SUCCESSFULLY SAVING A CHILD’S LIFE. I think you’d be likely to blow up a little too.

Was Sal a hothead? Absolutely. Was he being smart by mouthing off to Bobby? Absolutely not. But I think his lines to Bobby during that scene are so telling. “You’re just the latest jag off in a long line of jag offs to come to this house and think you know how to run it.” In other words, he’s not really seeing Bobby during this exchange (he couldn’t possibly, Bobby is still being very closed off and won’t tell anyone what his story is for years) he’s seeing the long line of assholes that started with Gerrard that Bobby is unknowingly falling into the pattern of. Just like how Bobby didn’t really see Sal and one relatively tiny restaurant, he saw his wife and family and a massive apartment building with no way out. That to me is the tragedy of Bobby and Sal. I genuinely think they could’ve learned a lot from each other if they had left their baggage at the door.

In other words, would we judge Sal if he had gone after Gerrard in the way he went after Bobby? I doubt it. And that to me is what Sal is actually doing, going after Gerrard and all the other nameless asshole captains he’s been dealing with for YEARS. Sal was hotheaded and impulsive, but at the end of the day I think he was just dealing with misplaced anger that he put on Bobby, something both Buck and Eddie have done at some point or another even when they DID have all the information. If you can forgive the lawsuit arc, and Eddie’s comments in season 5 about Bobby’s kill count than dear god I think Sal has more than earned a pass.

Overarching things I find interesting about Sal that I don’t see anyone talking about

He cares a lot about the people they save on rescues, he’s the one on the majority of calls saying some variant of “its gonna be ok/we’re gonna get you out/don’t worry. Whatever the firefighter equivalent of bedside manner is, this guy has it.

His personal code of who he gives a shit about seems to boil down entirely to who has skills/is talented and who isn’t. The minute Hen shows real promise by saving that little boy, he is down there hand shaking and complimenting her. Ditto Freddie Costas. “Smart kid, probably saved his own life with that move.” You see this in his conversation with Bobby too “that wasn’t luck man that was skill.” You have to earn Sal’s respect and the way you do is by demonstrating competence. Sal genuinely does look impressed with Bobby for apprehending Maurice and showing ingenuity, the problem is it's immediately undercut when Bobby belittles him for saving the kid.

Anywho, that’s my Sal defense thesis. There’s probably other stuff I forgot but that's the bulk of it. I reserve the right to randomly reblog this with any other shit that comes to mind. Also as a disclaimer I still LOVE reading toxic Sal or asshole Sal content, absolutely eat it up with a spoon gimme gimme gimme. But I think it would be unfair to say that’s the ONLY read of him. He clearly does give a shit and is capable of growth and change, he just also happens to have a short fuse and very little willingness to go about things in a tactful way.

TLDR: free my man, he did do some of that shit but so did your blorbos, it's just your blorbos had the narrative on their side when they did it.

#sal deluca #Tommy kinard #911 meta

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herejusttosufferalong · 2 months

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Ok, so I gotta put my 2 cents in after shipping N & L all on my lonesome for far too long. But ever since finding this blog & reading through to earlier posts, I’m starting to think whether I should entertain a different possibility about the situation. If we take N’s comments about L to be genuine - that he is uncomplicated in the best way, I wonder if that also means he’s just not on her wavelength. Like I think there is already consensus here that L’s fiends are duds & maybe L himself is too straightforward, his ambitions and interests too plain to really make N feel invested in pursuing something. We know that N is very politically aware, super smart/high achiever, a grafter and always wanting to do something new - she once said that she wants every role she does to be different from the last. Also, as a woo woo astrology girlie, I know that N is a sag Venus just like me & we get bored of romantic partners who don’t expand our horizon. It’s a shame because it’s obvious they have a lot of affection for each other, but maybe N just feels like it wouldn’t work out long term so doesn’t want to jeopardize the friendship & curdle all the beautiful memories? I even wonder whether this has somewhat contributed to L’s edgy new persona since HBS 2023. Though I’m not sure how dating a basic b like A makes him more interesting. Maybe he’s going scorched earth & just wants to lean into ‘meaningless fun’. It’s a real shame - I think if L continues to avoid what he really needs to do for personal growth & maturity, he is going to get stuck in this vapid life in the company of shallow people who don’t push him towards greater aspirations or deeper connections. Not saying that he has to hustle and be an A-lister, but he should at least do meaningful work that he finds fulfilling & I wonder if the people he surrounds himself with just don’t provide that encouragement or motivation. It seems like he’s paralyzed by too many seemingly difficult choices so he’s just free falling, letting life happen to him. This is based purely on vibes on my part of course, but I think his outward persona (not physically!) has definitely changed since he was with J. Like he thinks the goofy, silly guy that he was isn’t good enough - sheesh how Colin Bridgerton of him!

I should add that I’m of the camp that nothing has actually happened between N & L other than heavy/obvious flirting - like even more than what we’ve seen in public. That’s all the sexual tension imo that has nowhere to go as they haven’t acted on it.

At what point do I give up on the ship and accept that L might never step up & N isn’t the type of woman to settle for anything less than what she wants or wait around?

Sorry for the real downer vibes, but I’m obviously looking for a more optimistic perspective to talk me off the ledge 😆

#this is all opinion

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mysterycitrus · 5 months

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Quick question about how you decide what comics to care about? When it comes to characterization?

I know there’s comics that are generally considered ooc and no one really incorporates them into their characterizations. (Eg: I skimmed All Star Batman and Robin for fun. I now understand why people call him Crazy Steve, and I’m obviously not going to be taking this particular iteration of Batman and Robin into account when characterizing them.) But other than these really obvious instances, how do you deal with it? Like, I know fans of pre-N52 comics avoided a lot of stuff during that time? But now that we’re in Rebirth? I know that characterization in comic fandoms is always a bit thorny because of comic books as a medium, with all those different writers, timeline resets, etc… But you seem to have a really good handle on that, cause whenever I read any of your stuff and then read a comic, I’m usually like, yeah, same person here. Which I think is a feat! So, do you sort on vibes? Writers? Another metric? Case by case? TLDR: How do you deal when a character canonically says/does something that makes you go, “he would not fucking say that?”

Love your blog! And your writing!!!! Thank you!!!!!

ahh, crazy steve. what a guy (derogatory)

hmmmmmm for me personally if im writing a character i generally identify a “core” comic, regardless of retcons or conflicting characterisation, and then go off that. im reading a lot of bart allen atm so i focused on mark waid and todd dezago and completely ignored everything geoff johns has done with the character. for dick, scott snyder and judd winick are kinda the benchpoint for me, and then i kinda pick and choose (from wolfman, dixon, higgins, etc) what i think fits with that character. jason is easy cause he’s only had two comics worth anyone’s time. weirdly, some of roys best comics are written by devin grayson. so on and so forth.

wrt “he wouldn’t fucking say that” disease of which i am a chronic sufferer, I look back on dick (as an example) and his legacy characterisation, and whether or not it would make sense. not all legacy characterisation is good, mind!! but it’s generally easier to get a good benchmark if u go off a period when writers weren’t terminally on twitter. a lot of it is case by case, and i just map that in my brain

idk like SO much of it is just vibes and trying to create some internal consistency. like u said — there is so much conflicting characterisation and plotting and events that it can be very difficult so u just kinda have to trust ur own intuition. when i first posted persephone and got positive feedback for how i wrote dick I was kinda surprised — cause how i write him tends to clash with his popular depiction in both fandom and many modern comics. ig my real advice if ur writing (or reading) about these characters is to not fear complexity, and be conscious of exactly how racist most comic writers are.

#so sweet!!! but yeah comics can be whack #never fear conflicting characterisation !!! pick ur own adventure!!#Dick grayson #nightwing #dc comics #Batman #the ask and the answer

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deadpool15 · 11 months

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Roomate part 1

This is some dumb fucking shit. How can someone be this bad at their job, while sitting here smiling in my fucking face. "So, explain to me, umm, what was your name again?" Mika said, staring at the realtor with absolute disgust and annoyance. "Just Kim would be fine, sweetheart," he states, staring me up and down with a flirty expression. "Yea, that's amazing. I'm gonna call you bitch ass, you cool with that?" I stated watching his face completely drop. "So, since this very kind women can't talk to you like a fucking adult, I'm just gonna talk to you like the man child you mother obviously failed to raise. Now, would you be a dear and tell me how exactly does someone manages to sell a place to two different people with knowing. We obviously don't fucking look or sounds anything alike. Therefore, that rolls out that pathetic ass excuse. I should whoop your ass bitch-."

As I went to jump on him, the unknown woman that was standing next to me grabbed me. Holding me while apologizing, causing the man to immediately leave in fear. "OK ok you can stop now, Ms." I roughly back away from her casting her to put up her hands in the air as a showcase of surrender. "I know we are in a bit of a predicament here, but the papers have already been finalized. Plus, this place is more than big enough for the both of us, so we can just share it." I stared her down before laughing and shaking my head. "If you fuck up, I'll whoop your ass too."

And well, that's how me and bada met. At first, there was a bit of hostile energy, mainly from my side. I wasn't really sure about her, like I was judging her character before I let the real me out. Then, it all changed one night. She randomly got home from a long ass day of working, saying she needed some self-care immediately. I mean, true enough, I wasn't so sure about her yet, but I'm not a monster, and a girl in need is simply a girl in need. I sat her on the couch while we did face masks and painted each other's nails. She was a little on the rocky side about the nails, but I managed to talk or more so threaten her into it. After a while, we started talking about life. I learned she had a boyfriend named Howl, strange ass name.

"Wait so like when you two fuck, do you moan out howl or just government name. Because u fucking can't right now." I said laughing and hitting the coach, while bada sat there embarrassed and pushing me over. "I mean, I don't know. Like I don't really sit there and think about it." She says shyly. "What about you?" "Oo I don't do relationships, I mean, it's enough me to go around right. Plus, this pussy game is crazy, will have a motherfucker all obsessive and shit." She stares atcthe ground shocked. "Wow, are all Americans like this?" "Like what?"Just open and out there." I chuckle before adjusting myself on the seat. "To be honest, babes, I mean sex is sex. We are adults we should be able to talk about it freely. Plus, Korea is just really hush hush and polite about that stuff."

That night, Bada and i bonded. We became like sisters. Telling each other everything. I even met her man. They were a hot couple. I could see why they would go for each other. But that's pretty much all about Howl. we got to know each other to a certain degree. I mean, at the end of the day, girl code still exists, and it's something i truly ride and believe in, sisters over misters, you know. Like him and Bada would help pick out my outfits and stuff. Like right now. "So, what do you think?" I ask both of them as they are sitting on my bed eating snacks. "Don't you think they are a bit revealing?" Howl said while opening up another bag of the hot fries I had shipped here, while bada shoke her head, agreeing with him. "First of all, I'm a grown ass woman who is everything but insecure so I can show off. Secondly, shawty was fine in that pic she sent me, so she must wanna see all this. So, which one sluty sexy or sluty cute."

Each outfit was revealing yet gave a different vibe. I never questioned why Howl was protective over me, shit I thought he saw me as his little sister like Bada. Boy was I fucking wrong. I started showing then the messages between me and mystery women. She was a hot masc with a long wolf cut. And the entire conversation basically consists of us trying to have phone sex. But why sit in bed and play with myself when I can have her do it for me. "Wow, you two really are going to do this on the first date?" Bada asked while staring at me, looking slightly nervous, yet I couldn't understand why. To be honest, they both had been acting weird lately. They were like my best friends, so I wanted to know what was happening but didn't wanna drag it on. Maybe it's nothing. "Now you know I don't plan on dating that girl. Anyways, I'm sticking with sexy, so I'll be back and you two can do anything you horny fucks can thing of. Except fucking on my bed. Move it along weirdos." I tell them walking out the house.

"What the fuck, this shit is getting out of hand, Bada I thought we agreed to tell her?" Howl said angrily thinking about all the things Mika could be doing right now with that girl, she had been gone for hours. "I know, this is hard for me too. But we can't just tell her out of the blue. Hey, me and my boyfriend are totally in love with you, and I know you don't do relationships, but are you willing to date us, so we can finally call you ours and stop listening to you fuck other people." Bada stated basically yelling at him. "We just need to tell her this is bullshit-"

Before they could finish their conversation, they heard something slam against the door, startling them both. The sounds kept repeating as if someone was trying to get in, causing Howl to immediately grab Bada and place her behind him, thinking someone was trying to break into the apartment. "Are we being robbed?" Bada asks Howl in slight fear, but before he could defend them, both Mika comes crashing through the door, drunk as shit. With what seems to be her date. Both of them kissed and basically dry humping each other with clothes on, paying no mind to the people in the house. Mika moves her hand trying to lock the door before, the unknown woman grabs her neck shoves her knee into pussy, making sure to rub away all the tension. They both moan into each other's mouths and finally lock the door stumbling into her room, still without acknowledging her fellow roommate and boyfriend.

As they bedroom door abruptly closes shut, they are now finally out of the eye sight of Bada and Howl, who are seething in anger. "I thought you said they weren't gonna work out, jackass?" Bada whisper yelled at Howl, hitting him in the shoulder. Though he can't even find the time to register the pain before all they can hear is the sound of the bed creeks against the wall. "They shouldn't have, I mean, they don't have anything in common. What the fuck does she has that we don't?" "We are telling her tomorrow, I don't care what we have to do but she is gonna know. We can't go on like this. It's supposed to be the three of us, ok?" Howl says while grabbing Bada's cheeks, looking into her eyes for reassurance. She nods along.

"Y-yes... shit.... right there.... ughhh... fuck me...". Bada turns to looks at the door with a sour expression, "but let's go, I refuse to listen to this shit any longer. Not when we can obviously make her moan way louder then that." Howl just smiles for a moment and nods, "exactly baby let's not feed into negatively. She will be ours by tomorrow night."

(See, I know yall are waiting on the mommy duties part 2 fic, but I just got sick as fuck and I feel like garbage. But I don't want yall to think I'm one of those writers that's coming up with a new excuse every week, so I will try my best to work on it, babes. Now tell me if yall feel like roommate pt.2 would be a good idea or nah?)

#swf2 #street woman fighter 2 #street woman fighter x reader #bada lee x reader #bada lee

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ca-suffit · 2 months

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im sorry your takes are generally pretty great and i appreciate the space you make in fandom but i find the dismissal around lestat's queerness to be diminishing.

louis is a fantastic gay character and u r right about how he represents his queerness which is fabulously. he is mother he is fashion he is wife, a lot, and lestat is a lot more masc in aspects of their dynamic. louis also struggles with it, had internalized homophobia, and his relationship to his sexuality is fraught. now you can have that complexity and still be a "gay icon" sure but what i see here is a gay man existing. not every gay man existing has to be ~iconic~. louis is working on himself.

lestat is a different person and is going out there to make a mark on culture actively, regardless of why. he's not putting on a dress for five seconds (which btw was still pretty impactful in context but ok), he is being meaningfully gnc and making art. this is what queer culture is. it's frustrating to see this element diminished like it's just a meme or a bunch of people being thirsty.

im all for critiquing fandom being weirdos about it but i think the showrunners are doing something spectacular and pretending like fans are making lestat into something he is not just isn't the vibe.

reading this made me realize that I left out a sentence in this ask, so it did come off differently than I intended. I'd meant to say there's already been a lot of exploration of characters / ppl like lestat, but there's never been a character like louis before. I wasn't rly ever talking about lestat's queerness itself, I was talking about how he's prioritized bcuz he's white.

if u personally identity with him in this then that's ur right to, obviously. no group is a monolith and I was never trying to say one way is more "right" than the other. I rly do apologize if it came across like that, cuz I can see why it did.

"he's not putting on a dress for five seconds (which btw was still pretty impactful in context but ok)"

I don't rly know what u mean here bcuz within the show, nobody comments on the dress. ppl react to the baby but everything we know of the dress otherwise was only revealed by carol cutshall bts. I don't know what impact ur meaning here. to the tv audience, sure, but the NOLA audience?? or is it the fact he designed it in the first place.

tbh the thing I most noticed was that once again a white, european immigrant got to be center stage in an event that louis, as a black, louisiana native, isn't (like the card game lestat already had a place at more favored than louis earlier in S1). he also was able to wear that dress in public without public scorn (being european prbly helped here too, he's "other'd" but not the same way as louis is "other'd" for being black), which is something louis could never have done and actually survived at all. it's not that lestat doesn't experience homophobia otherwise, but he's still got a lot more room to confront it than louis, claudia, or armand would have, as ppl who would be confronting homophobia *and* racism with no access to white privilege (claudia literally dies in the same hour we see lestat confront a homophobe otherwise on his and louis' behalf and "win").

idk what they're going to explore for S3 yet, but what we've seen so far is....not that deep tbh. it's not even especially "queer." we're aware he is so we know it is, but straight men have worn makeup and flashy outfits and done homoerotic shit as musicians before too. very often. nothing we've seen from lestat so far has been pushing any boundary as a queer artist or making any kind of statement. I'm not trying to sound like a total bitch here, but a lot of what ur saying is pushing this white fandom agenda of the "importance" of so much that any white, queer character does that....just isn't. lestat's image and sound is taking a lot from other ppl in real music history who *were* doing groundbreaking things at the time, straight or not, but what he's doing is just wearing it as a costume rn. his lyrics even say "I'm an actor / in my makeup." like I said, S3 in full will bring more to the table, obviously, but for what we've seen so far....this hasn't said anything in any objective way that's "deep." u can still like it and identity with it, but idk how u'd argue that it's doing anything tbh. ur welcome to do it tho, I'm not trying to shut down the conversation here. I'm just giving my perspective. I *do* actually think this is stuff we should talk about exactly *bcuz* fandom rides so hard for it all the time. it should be explored why that is, what's the logic behind it. I rly am interested.

edit: wanted to add too that p much everyone we see in this show is queer and creative so literally why is nobody ever saying all this about louis' photography, claudia's acting and interest in fashion (or her general observations on the world thru so many diaries that are referenced in multiple ways as she's not around anymore to speak otherwise), armand's theatre work, madeleine's dressmaking. that's usually why ppl comment on lestat, bcuz he's the most noticed and praised but he's literally not the only one doing it at all.

#asks #interview with the vampire #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc #amc iwtv #iwtv 2022 #louis de pointe du lac #iwtv claudia #lestat de lioncourt #rockstar lestat #gay #queer

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idkjustlemmedrownlikerab · 26 days

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Midnights (Marauder's Version)

Welcome back to the new series by @marsmarauders and I. Obviously we got carried away again but here you have every single song from Midnights related to the Marauders characters :D

So we present to you... Midnights (Marauder's Version)

Lavender Haze

“The 1950s shit they want from me, I just wanna stay in that Lavender haze"

Like this song is very obviously Jily falling hopelessly in love with each other I don’t think it needs to be further elaborated

Maroon

“When the silence came, we were shaking, blind and hazy, How the hell did we lose sight of us again?"

Wolfstar, but specifically like… November 1981. The vinyl reference, "the lips I used to call home," "laughing with my feet in your lap," and "the rust that grew between telephones" signifying how they weren’t communicating well and hiding things from each other "I see you everyday now" cause Remus sees the sky and what just so happens to be in the sky? Stars. Sirius also sees the sky from his prison cell and what does he see? Oh that’s right the moon!

Anti-Hero

“When my depression works the graveyard shift, All of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room”

We had two theories for this one first being Regulus bcoz of the self deprecating vibe and “I'll stare directly at the sun (James) but never in the mirror”

But we could also see it as Mary post-war? It's hard to describe why, but everyone sees her as the Anti-Hero cause she saved herself even tho she had full right to do that

Snow on the Beach

For this one I was utterly confused and absolutely useless and Marls came up with this interpretation herself

"Can this be a real thing? Can it? Are we falling like snow at the beach?"

This song is Sirius's perspective specifically during the wolfstar forgiveness phase after the prank. "You wanting me tonight feels impossible".

You're On Your Own, Kid

"You're on your own, kid, You always have been"

Both of us agree that this song screams all the Black children because none of them chose this town (family) and dreamt of getting out, I mean the whole song recounts a young person who longs for love but eventually understands that they are on their own and always have been afterall whatever you do you can never escape the black family curse can you?

Midnight Rain

“He was sunshine, I was midnight rain”

I mean do I even need to say anything? Its jegulus bcoz they r the literal definition of opposites attract even tho they loved each other they were born on two different sides of a war which inevitably became the reason of their end.

Question…?

"Can I ask you a question? Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room"

Dorlene. That’s it, like we have no explanation, just vibes.

Vigilante Shit

"I don't start it but I can tell you how it ends, Don't get sad, get even"

Both of us agree it could be both Regulus or Dorcas because canonically Regulus knew about the horcruxes, and died while deceiving the dark lord and on the way to kill him (also bonus bcoz the final blow which made him take this decision was bcoz Voldemort exploited Kreature so Reg decided to get even) Dorcas on the other hand canonically had to be killed by Voldemort himself because she was posing as too big a threat to his empire

Bejeweled

"Baby love, I think I've been a little too kind, Didn't notice you walking all over my peace of mind"

Lily about Severus and how even tho she mourns and misses her friendship with him, it will never be worth more than her self respect and how she won’t let him walk all over her, a diamond’s gotta shine afterall ;)

Labyrinth

"Uh oh, I'm falling in love, Oh no, I'm falling in love again, Oh, I'm falling in love"

To me this song is sooo obviously jegulus coz of the chorus alone, its James realizing that he’s falling in love again, this time with Regulus after pining after Lily for years. Just how when he thought he was “unlovable” and it was all doomed this sickly, victorian looking, snarky slytherin boy swoops in and steals his heart right out of his chest

Marls has her own hc for Emmary tho where basically Mary was in love with Lily but it was unrequited and then she had a situationship with Emmaline but ended up catching feelings which is so perfect for this song

Karma

"And I keep my side of the street clean, You wouldn't know what I mean"

Again I had no opinion on this song coz it felt like too happy and too upbeat a song for any of these miserable sods (I still love them ) but Marls swooped in with a brilliant interpretation which was that its from Dorcas’ pov to the slytherin trio basically throwing shade at them for choosing to stay and join the death eaters instead of leaving and fighting for the “right” side like her

Sweet Nothing

"They said the end is comin', everyone's up to somethin' I find myself runnin' home to your sweet nothings"

Now for this song we had differing views with me being a jegulus girlie while Marls being a jily girlie (we still love both the ships tho, we just have a preference)

To me the song is jegulus coz I see it as them expecting the inevitable end of their relationship and doom due to the impending war and their family’s differing views and them just trying to tune everything out to spend their limited time together and in love.

On the other hand Marls interpreted is as to when the Potters were in hiding with only each other and Harry for company. How they could see that the war was on full ride and they were at the centre of it while still trying to create some sweet and happy memories with their son

Mastermind

"I laid the groundwork, and then, Just like clockwork, The dominos cascaded in a line, What if I told you I'm a mastermind?"

(Try and tell me the whole bridge doesn’t scream Regulus Arcturus Black.) To me the song is about Regulus because the man literally was a mastermind, while being a death eater he planned to betray Voldemort by destroying a horcrux and he was actually successful in retrieving it tho maybe I’m a little biased due to his characterization in the fic only the brave (Marls also thinks the song could be about James bcoz of the bridge "To make them love me and make it seem effortless")

The Great War

"I vowed I would always be yours, 'Cause we survived the Great War"

Marls didn’t really have an opinion on this one but for me it was very clearly wolfstar. First reason obviously being the fact that they are pretty much the only couple who actually survived the war (the first one that is, we all remember how the second one went). "Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed" being how they both thought the other was the spy and the prank

Bigger Than The Whole Sky

"Every single thing I touch becomes sick with sadness, 'Cause it's all over now, all out to sea"

Now this could go two ways one being the black brothers,

"Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, You were bigger than the whole sky"

Basically how Sirius feels when Regulus gets the dark mark. Because his brother is too far gone

Bonus since Regulus dies literally all out at sea

The other being marylily bcoz of

"What could've been, would've been, What should've been you"

"And I've got a lot to pine about, I've got a lot to live without"

Obviously from Mary’s pov since Lily is dead

Paris

Now Marls had no idea about and I suggested rosekiller just coz of vibes and coz

"I wanna brainwash you, Into loving me forever"

This seems like something Barty would definitely say

High Infidelity

"You know there's many different ways that you can kill the one you love, The slowest way is never loving them enough"

To me this song is bartylus coded (don’t worry they then get together with Evan and James and have a happy relationship) especially coz of this one specific rosekiller microfic I’d seen if I find it I’ll reblog it with this post

Glitch

"In search of glorious happenings of happenstance on someone else's playground, But it's been two thousand one hundred and 90 days of our love blackout"

We agreed this song gives off wolfstar vibes tho we are open to suggestions

Also 2190 days is six years which is around the same amount of time wolfstar dated if we hc that they got together around their 5th year :D

Would've, Could've, Should've

"If clarity's in death, then why won't this die?, Years of tearing down our banners, you and I, Living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts, Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first"

Now this track could be taken in many contexts I like the interpretation of it being from the Black children’s perspective to their parents

And another one being from Remus to Greyback

"And if I was a child, did it matter, If you got to wash your hands?"

Marls also suggested it being from Narcissa’s pov to Lucius or Bellatrix, regretting not going with Andromeda which also fits wonderfully

(Since it in itself is talking about the person suffering due to a relationship when they were young and it even now haunts them I feel like this song could be interpreted many many ways bcoz all of the marauders era characters dealt with a lot of trauma at a young age)

Well obviously since most of them didn’t even reach their twenties

Dear Reader

"Dear Reader, if it feels like a trap, You're already in one"

Peter Pettigrew. Need I see anything more?

Hits Different

"In the good in the world, you once believed in me, And I felt you and I held you for a while"

Lily without Snape in her life especially when she starts falling for James

You're Losing Me

"How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?, I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick, My face was gray, but you wouldn't admit that we were sick"

For this one there wasn’t even a discussion needed it is wolfstar during the first war and we won’t hear otherwise. How even tho Sirius and Remus loved each other, the pressure of the war itself was too much on them especially coz they were so young and also coz of how Peter was manipulating them against the other ("Was it because I'm a werewolf?" "Was it because I'm a Black?" I’m sorry). They could see their relationship was straining, they kept waiting for the other to take a risk, a step to fix it and how even through their suspicions, they loved each other regardless

AAAAND THAT'S A WRAP!! THANK YOU FOR READING THIS!!

Make sure to come back to see Evermore, coming soon! (To a theater near you.)

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joanofexys · 3 months

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Please I must know more about Angel…

I’m gonna do a mix of fun facts and extra Angel backstory/PSU stuff so hopefully there’ll be something good in there

Some fun facts abt Angel:

Cuts the sleeves off most of his shirts

Crop. Tops.

Basically I wanted more men to dress like whores

Except he lowkey does it in a dad, rock band in someone’s garage, hot mechanic kind of way if that vibe makes sense in any capacity

His nose is crooked

Has a lot of scarring across his body, most of it has keloided (idk if that’s a word but I have keloid scars so leave me alone rip). He’s also got a few on his face

Because they’re raised and pretty prominent they tend to weird most people out and even though most of them are from when he was 10 or younger (courtesy of his father) they haven’t really faded. Some of them hurt some of them don’t

He doesn’t really like them or think they’re cool, he’s learned to feel neutral about it. However, Phoebe loves his scars

He’s built like a fucking brick wall. Just absolutely massive

gonna put it under the cut cause partial nudity ig but this is an idea of his body build:

also real quick the closest I’ve gotten for a good face claim for him is Isaiah Baumgardner

His hands are really cut up/scarred (I’ll explain this in a sec)

Cat and dog person. He will argue very passionately for it too and how unfair he thinks it is whenever people try and demonize cats or dogs

Queen would probably be the top artist in his Spotify wrapped

Hoards different editions of classics

Okay yeah moving on from the random bullets to me writing another essay about him

I did NOT get into this in his initial post but yeah his dad is a serial killer. For years his mom is labeled as missing (went missing when he was 4 years old) and then at 10 years old he’s removed from his dad’s home and moved into foster care. It wasn’t until 14 that his mother was confirmed dead upon his father’s arrest and confession.

When he was 14 years old the police randomly showed up at the door of his foster family at the time and took him down to the station. He was questioned for 7 hours, wrapping up at 3 in the morning, while the police tried to figure out if he had any knowledge or involvement in his father’s murders. All it resulted in was a crying Angel begging for his mommy to come home. With how young he was and the fact that he had been out of the home for 4 years (and his father continued killing during those 4 years) they declared there was no way he was aware. He was offered a chance to testify against his father. He refused to show.

When they dropped him off at his foster home he very nearly got the cops called again. He destroyed his room. Every personal belonging he had bought or been given by former families. He moved to a different home within the week. He breaks a lot of glass. And insists on cleaning it up himself. He cuts up his hands bad doing so. They have to take him to the ER.

Because he was a minor and had basically no ties to his father he was largely kept out of the media. When his father’s arrest and plea of guilty made the news it was mentioned that he had a single son but there was never a name. Obviously with Di Fiore anyone who looks him up is likely to get his dad in the search results instead. But he does his best to keep it hidden. It’s pretty easy for Wymack (and Andrew rip) to dig it up but Angel keeps it buried until he ends up at Palmetto. Once Andrew drops that he knows then Angel gives up on trying to keep any secrets from the foxes pretty much

He spends most of his time with the monsters. Phoebe’s favorites of them end up being Andrew (much to Aaron’s dismay since Aaron babysits more) and Kevin. However, like how cats can tell when people don’t like them, she is prone to asking for Neil and refusing to let anyone else hold her. Neil has no fucking clue what to do with her

When he goes to Eden’s with them if he can’t leave Phoebe with Harper then his go to babysitters are Dan & Matt and Wymack

He spends more time crashing at Wymack or Abby’s places than in the dorms

Resisting the urge to dump about my oc x canon ships but he and Allison are fwbs. He and Kevin are something (he’s basically a weighted blanket as a person which is something I think Kevin needs)

Uhhhhh fuck what else is going on with him. Idk he keeps to himself. He and Harper go on double dates with Katelyn and Aaron despite being broken up. He’s both very obviously a fucked up teenager and a good dad at the same time. He’s prone to cheating at board games. He doesn’t yell at people. His hearing’s a little fucked but he’ll probably never get it checked out. He’s very physically affectionate when he’s given permission (but he’ll always ask first. it’s good for setting healthy boundaries but it’s especially for Phoebe and to make sure she knows her boundaries will always be respected at home even from a young age). He likes RPGs (he’d be a huge fan of BG3) and is a fantasy nerd. Yeah that’s just a bit more about him

#asks #anon #my ocs #oc: angelo di fiore #aftg #aftg ocs

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batsplat · 4 months

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more thoughts? PLEASE

okay I'm gonna assume this is about my tags on the sete post and well when I was editing I cut out a lot from a bunch of different sections so there's not necessarily... uh. this isn't going to be a coherent addition. but I have a few more thoughts I might as well rattle through

1. reinvention

idk I just enjoy what he's doing with his style changes during that time... like in 2002, 2003 and 2004 you've got a different vibe going on each year. the whole point of that brno hair colour thing was that it was almost a step back into the past, of re-embracing the fun and the whimsy and escaping the constraints and pressures of the present. very much embracing a more youthful vibe when you compare it to 2002, getting back in touch with his inner teenager, all while he's plotting his crazy move to yamaha. and then 2004 obviously he inevitably changes up his colour scheme, but he also lets his hair grow out and it ends up nicely emphasising that this is a New Era for him. not really an original point but there's just something fun and playful to how he uses his cute lil visual storytelling elements, from the hairstyles to the celebrations... he makes it fun to analyse him, y'know? always thinking about The Narrative

2. the symbolism of it all

this bit was too vibes-based to make it into the post but it's basically linked to these bits in the conclusion:

and following on from the reinvention thing, I do think there's something narratively rich to how valentino had to change his approach as a result of the switch to yamaha. you have this... I wouldn't call it a regression necessarily but maybe a recapturing of this playfulness in the middle of 2003 with the whole brno thing, but then there's something a little tougher and hardened about him in his yamaha days that kind of comes from necessity because he just didn't have that margin for error anymore. from the mat oxley reference book:

Some racers think motorcycle racing is a high-speed ballet, others think it's a petrolhead's wrestling match. Valentino always had the killer instinct, but it's significant that he only became known as a warrior rider after he left Honda. Without the technical advantage of the RC211V, he needed to find another way to beat rivals. He found that way at the 2005 Spanish GP, where he battered into Sete Gibernau at the final corner to win the race. He used similarly aggressive tactics to beat Casey Stoner at Laguna Seca in 2008 and Jorge Lorenzo at Motegi in 2010, and to deal with Marc Marquez during 2015. It has been said that Vale invented this kind of racing, although a deeper look into the sport's history reveals that this isn't true. And yet there's no doubt that he loved the thrill of the chase and the thrill of the kill.

and yeah, crucially, he did always have it in him. he was a proper menace in his rookie 125cc season, to the surprise of absolutely no one. but it's a very valentino thing, isn't it... you've got this clown prince persona, you have this exuberance and joie de vivre and all of it, and it's not like any of that is a lie. it's also not like his friendliness to other people is a lie either: the anecdotes about this are pretty consistent in telling you about how he does take genuine interest in his fellow human beings, which is hardly something you can take for granted with the kind of socially isolated egomaniacs competitive sports tends to produce. (though he does also benefit in that regard from coming up through an era in which the sport was still a little less professionalised and he was afforded somewhat more time to develop into a generally more well-rounded character, not a bad thing lbr.) but then, back against the wall, the fangs come out. and in a way that's what the entire 2004 season was about for him - this period where he was actually facing real challenges, a period of transition and transformation where the winning was a little less easy and he changed as a competitor as a result of that

and there's just something... idk, fitting, about how it was sete specifically who ended up being the victim of this, the guy who had always been seen as a little too carefree and nice and soft to cut it at the sharp end of the sport. who valentino had befriended: he'd been happy to blur that line between competitor and friend back then, though obviously that friendship started before sete became a serious threat. if you really want to go off the deep end with this, you could say valentino ended up exorcising the softness within himself by crushing sete. he wasn't going to allow any weakness in his own competitive make up, not when it could actually cost him. and in a way he really did have to understand sete really well, to know how to get to him in the way he did, to know how to play all those little moments in front of the cameras... those moments where he's cold to sete and knows it will unsettle sete, where he extends his hand and knows sete will accept, all of it. targeted cruelty, based on a thorough understanding of sete's character. again, this is a bit of a reach but you could say the two feuds where he went the furthest with his cruelty were against the two blokes who were the most similar to valentino. and, well, sometimes you do have to understand someone to truly know how best to hurt them

the whole episode also ended up signalling something to his competitors, almost like a warning. it's not like his relationship with everyone else in the paddock changed from one day to the next and he still had good friendships with other guys after that - even those he was actually competing against, like nicky hayden or loris capirossi. but inevitably, it will have also shifted perceptions of valentino. after the feud with biaggi you could say he was really young and also a lot of people had problems with biaggi. but gibernau? if you need concrete evidence people took notice of valentino's behaviour, take casey in 2007 saying to valentino that he didn't want their relationship deteriorate the same way it had with biaggi/gibernau. one feud can happen to everyone, two starts looking a little suspicious - three was where it became a pattern

3. rivalries

y'know, I've seen that casey quote about valentino and gibernau and biaggi thrown around a fair few places over the years, but the thing I've always been kind of curious about is what valentino thought about casey telling him that. if this is a pattern of behaviour, then what's happening there is valentino being confronted with that pattern, right? I think an underlying question you have to address at some point with valentino and his rivalries is how aware he is of what he's doing. like, is he consciously engineering feuds or is he doing it subconsciously? and I think it can be a bit misleading if the first valentino feud you come across is the marc one, because it'll prime you to read all the other ones in certain ways that might not be entirely accurate. I've not quite figured out how to express this yet so bear with me here - but marc is the one who valentino felt the most hurt by and continues to feel the most hurt by and as a result it's the most emotionally charged feud from his perspective. but what that also means is it's the feud where he's the least consciously aware of how he himself has contributed to this whole nightmare situation they've got going on. because from his perspective he did treat marc differently from... well, basically from any post-sete major or even minor rival. he offered marc all that kindness and generosity and good will and graciousness in defeat as well as victory and had it thrown in his face

which makes it easy to assume this is all just... well, not just twenty years of feuding but also twenty years of self-delusion. and it's not quite like that - he has more self-awareness than that I think. when you read how he talks about biaggi in his autobiography (who he is kind enough not to completely erase from his narrative), even in 2005 he seems to have a pretty good handle on what that feud really was. okay, maybe he does somewhat shirk responsibility and somewhat overemphasises the role of the media as opposed to his own malice, but there's an awareness of how stupid and silly and mean-spirited the whole thing was. it was just a kind of nasty rivalry with a guy valentino didn't like much - but who, for what it's worth, wasn't exactly going out of his way to be nice to valentino either. sure, it ended up being torture for biaggi, and sure valentino did maybe relish inflicting said torture a little more than is morally appropriate. but y'know, in some ways, it's quite straightforward, this honest mutual dislike. uncomplicated, even

and this I did not include in the actual sete post because it's just complete and utter speculation, but I wonder to what extent the sete experience did end up changing valentino's approach to his competitors. whether he deliberately embraced that side of himself a little more and was a little more considered and calculating in how he treated his rivals, more in touch with his inner bastard, if you will. even if he just had in the back of his mind that something like with sete could happen again, even if he was just a bit more careful about keeping certain blokes at arm's length. because, remember, from his perspective this was also the first time a relationship with a rival deteriorated this drastically - now you can say 'yeah but it was his fault', but that doesn't change how it was a new experience for valentino too! he was also learning stuff about himself in the process, going through an important journey of self-exploration, etc etc. love crushing my enemies on the path to self-actualisation

and valentino did learn a lot from that whole experience on-track, he did learn useful skills in terms of managing rivalries - so maybe he also looked at what worked on sete in the psychological warfare department and, y'know, consciously made a note of it. when casey delivered that little spiel to valentino about not wanting their relationship to deteriorate, I assume valentino responded perfectly pleasantly in the moment... but I do also think he was extremely ready to deliberately sour their dynamic if he had to. zero self-delusion required

he's quite calculating with casey and jorge I feel... especially with casey, he really didn't waste his time feeling emotionally slighted or coming up with reasons why casey was the devil and needed to be destroyed. he wanted to destroy casey because he wanted to win, and was comfortable enough in his own skin to use the full bag of tools and tricks to do so, no complex internal narratives to justify the whole thing needed. for him, that was all just part of the game. it wasn't for casey, which is a topic for an entirely different post, but... well, casey and jorge in particular are the ones who have spoken about this valentino desire to create enemies, to give himself someone to hate etc. and in a way, ironically I would say they're the two for who that was the least true. yeah, they gave him a helpful target and he was perfectly happy to whip up drama where needed. but I don't really think he was going to any particular lengths to invent reasons to hate them (even his 2010 dramatics were really just faffing about). he found them both kinda annoying and he wanted to beat them. that's it

4. these photos of valentino and sete at sepang 2004

idk I just like photos that have nebulously bad vibes if you know the context. it would have been quite funny if they'd consistently used the same shade of yellow in sepang press conferences over the years

5. marc

all of the stuff above does to me really emphasise how... god. this is the thing about valentino and marc, right, as a tragic narrative - it feels inevitable in many ways that this had to somehow go wrong, but then at the same time the exact way in which it did end up going wrong was reliant on so many things playing out the exact way in which they did, that it feels like if you could have just slightly changed things... like, let's say for a moment my baseless speculation about valentino is correct and he did become a little more careful and deliberate in how he approached his relationships with his competitors after the sete experience. there's so much that had to come together for him to lower his guard around marc to the extent that he did. again, injuries, ducati, how he wasn't really competitive in 2013, how dominant marc was especially in the first half of 2014... all these things that came together to lull them both into this false sense of security, spurred on by genuine interpersonal chemistry - all of which allowed them to even become friends in the first place

think about what the early marc and valentino relationship looks like if you're casey (who, bless him, certainly wasn't paying close enough attention to motogp to be aware of 'press conference vibes') or jorge (who, bless him, was unfortunately unable to avoid said press conference vibes). isn't there a little part of you that goes 'what the fuck is all this then' when you see valentino act like marc is god's gift to motorcycle racing after spending years enacting elaborate hazing rituals any time particularly promising talent had come through? casey's little 'yeah he was fucking with me in practise in 2006' line, jorge... okay in valentino's defence, it's worth pointing out that their 2008 relationship was more cordial than literally anyone had expected, and things only really soured in 2010. but still, their camps did already start up a healthy habit of sniping at each other in the press in 2009 and they did have the whole cold war cosplay situation going on, so. jorge certainly wasn't being given the kid gloves treatment

and sure, 2014 was a pretty drama free year for everyone because the general consensus was 'what would be the point', and I suppose if you're jorge you might also just assume the old man's washed and has gone soft in his advanced age. but still! I think I'd be a tad peeved myself, especially given valentino immediately fell into a lovely little habit of taking marc's side in controversies from the very start of marc's rookie season. but that's kind of the point - valentino's entire approach to marc required that past history of feuding for him to fall back on, for him to imitate/echo when the moment arrived (as I talked about here)... but it also required valentino to have gotten enough distance from all of his past misadventures for him to not have that sort of mindset from the outset when it came to marc

which, another thing I feel like maybe can get obscured a little if you're looking back on past rivalries with the marc-lens - this concept of valentino 'switching up' towards his opponents. because I do actually think there is something categorically different between the sete + marc rivalries when compared to any of his other ones - and it's how deliberate that switch-up is from valentino's perspective, vs to what extent it's driven by 'genuine' emotion. I just think there were rivalries (for a given value of the word if we're including melandri here) between sete's era and marc's era where valentino decided he was going to create a little distance there - but it was all part of the game. he didn't hate those guys. he just wanted to win, and understood as much about himself

but he does hate marc, because that rivalry was never supposed to be like the other ones. which, in the end, is what made it far far worse

6. che spettacolo

'he was so happy after sealing his first yamaha title :)' I go, knowing he had just pulled off a pretty fucking nasty spite win against a bloke he'd recently put a curse on. he really did risk quite a lot in the penultimate round of the season, just because he could not bear to see sete win that race. revealing, isn't it? obviously he'd always try to win the race, but... at times he just couldn't help himself in how far he went

anyway, it's my favourite of his title-winning shirts. a deliberate departure from tradition - he told his team he didn't want logos or any other decoration or even any mention that he was world champion again. the reasoning he gave was that nobody would expect it from him, which... well, yeah, it's what that whole year was about, wasn't it? about doing the unexpected, about proving everyone wrong - and, in the end, about putting on a show. like all the best valentino celebrations, it gets the message across and explains to you quite clearly what he thinks the story of his victory was. memorable in its simplicity but tells you everything you need to know

one of his career highlights <3 it's in character that the whole thing was just a little bit evil

7. film

I cannot for the life of me remember when this was except it was post-2015, but one time in a presser valentino was asked which rivalry of his he'd make into a movie and his answer was biaggi. obviously it's hard to argue with the dramatic appeal of that particular story and it's certainly got a lot of very memorable moments, but my hot take is that the sete rivalry has got it beat by virtue of having a far clearer narrative arc. it's a slightly unusual, slightly odd story for a sports rivalry... like I said in the sete post, people aren't typically all that compelled by sports rivalries where you know from the outset which one of them is better. what's the point then, right? very much the indie flavour rivalry, a little more niche and philosophical and inscrutable and, y'know, darker. this is a feud that centres around a curse, after all. this one's for the girls who get it etc etc

valentino's erasure of sete is interesting for a lot of reasons, but it's a shame because it really is such a good narrative arc that adds so much to the transition to yamaha. the transformation valentino himself went through as a competitor, how he responded to real threats emerging, revealing your true nature in extremis and all of that... I'm not entirely convinced by how sete says valentino didn't need to do what he did against sete - he said it specifically about jerez, which I suppose is debatable, but I imagine he meant it more broadly too. there was a moment valentino could have lost that 2004 championship. and he'd already decided he would do anything to stop that from happening, which things like that assen last lap nicely symbolised. the thing about judging valentino for the foibles and the spite and the dishonesty and the competitive paranoia and all of it - well, at the end of the day they are key aspects of his make up as a competitor for a reason. you can judge him as a person... but as an athlete, more often than not they worked out in his favour. that's what's so interesting about sepang 2015 in a way - it's the only time the whole thing well and truly backfired

(I know casey has drawn the comparison between himself and marc before and argued valentino's biggest mistake was in making enemies but... well. was it? it wasn't against casey - valentino did not lose anything by making an enemy out of casey and he very well may have gained a lot, depending on what your read of the 2008 season is. very much a topic for another post... but this is the thing right, I think it's perfectly reasonable to object to valentino's behaviour on moral grounds, less reasonable to ignore why it was such a big part of who he was as a competitor and how it helped him succeed. I completely understand why casey wants to draw that comparison, but - perhaps unfortunately - it's a little too nice to be true that valentino's malice cost him as much as casey suggests it did)

valentino learns a lot from the sete rivalry in terms of his storytelling and self-mythologisation, not least in how he plays up the theatre of the sepang presser. one aspect that really stands out to me is the pointed cruelty of his celebrations after sepang. from the sete post:

revisiting his whole 'character arc' from the 2003-05 period here, you've got this reversion in 2003, right, this throwback to the antics of his teenage years, and then you've got him getting meaner in 2004... and these things are married here. the whimsy and fun inherent to his celebrations is being wielded in the name of humiliating his competitors, of making a joke out of them. there's this thin line between joy and malice, where throughout his career he seems so endlessly capable of both - even at the same time, clearly. he's obviously already shown himself capable of mocking his opponents in the biaggi days, but, I don't know, it really does feel like there's something to how deliberately the humiliation is incorporated into the theatre of victory here. what a spectacle indeed

8. rage and panic

but then again, I really don't want to pretend like valentino is perfectly rational or calculating in what he's doing here. remember where all this started - in qatar, a race where he well and truly lost his cool and he knows as much. I included the relevant autobiography section in this post, but just to put the bit here that's bit about qatar itself:

he knows his brain fucked him over! I also think it's interesting that this reads slightly differently from his immediate post-race quotes, which I included in the sete post:

was he angry or was he relaxed or, somehow, both? was that unfortunate moment of relaxation caused by the inevitable letdown from the anger - was it unsustainable to ride like that? either way, the key bit to me is the heightened emotions involved and how usually he has it under control, usually he can use all of this in his own interest to spur himself on... except when he can't. as I pointed out in the tags of the qatar post, there are elements of that race that do remind you of another 25 year old rider who had received a penalty he felt was unfair and was working his way through the field while running hot on emotion. it's all fun and games and smiling assassins etc etc, but if you get them really angry...

and, y'know, in a way there's an element of panic to his post-qatar media rampage. okay, sure, he was clearly furious and the whole thing did end up working out in his favour, but in the moment he must have also been scared he was going to end up losing a championship he'd thought he basically had wrapped up. it's funny because if motogp were a sane and normal sport, valentino (allegedly) vowing his title rival would never win a race again on live tv should have been a moment of foolishness and hubris and should have been remembered as such. it should have been him losing it for a moment there and saying a bunch of stuff he'd need to gloss over and hope everyone moves on quickly from. it is absolutely bonkers that it all played out the way it did post-qatar and it just like... all went in his favour. it could not have gone better for him. there's a world in which 2004 is remembered as the title valentino squandered. but sometimes hubris gets rewarded, I suppose

9. margin

sane and normal sport, huh? the thing about sports is that none of it is sane and normal. if you actually go through the races one by one and look at all the instances sete could have won a race post-qatar, it does feel just incredibly improbable that sete never won a single one of those damn things. I mean, there are five races where he's literally going into the last lap(!!) with a chance of winning. (in the name of journalistic integrity I do have to point out sete's fuel ran out in the last lap of brno so he didn't really have a chance of winning, but that just brings us back to the 'does motogp exist in a parallel universe where black magic is real' question.) in three of them, sete is ahead of valentino at some point of that final lap

one of the worst things about sports is that sometimes it can trick you into thinking the final outcome is in doubt when it actually kind of isn't. the fact that these two blokes are arriving at the last lap together fools you into thinking that both of them have a decent shot of winning. but obviously it doesn't actually work like that. call it skill and the extra margin of error a decisive performance edge will provide you, call it a clutch factor, call it how 'broken' sete was - it really was just the illusion of proximity, the illusion of tight margins. maybe it really was a test of wills. in two of those races, valentino risked quite a lot to win. phillip island for obvious title arithmetic reasons, jerez because he's literally throwing his bike against sete's in his desperation to prevent sete from beating him. in some ways, it feels unfair to judge sete's mentality too harshly - firstly because this is an insane person sport and I do think he has a point when he says it's maybe not a great idea to laud crash-happy riders for their 'bravery', and secondly because he was just fundamentally the worse rider, which obviously means it was always going to be harder for him to beat valentino than vice versa. but, and this is without any judgement, sete's problem was that valentino always would have been willing to go further than him in his desire to win. to be good at the insane person sport... you do unfortunately have to be insane

10. momentum

I'm not going to be able to do this justice here so I'll only address it very briefly. but I've referred quite a few times to what valentino 'learned' from those years and the sete rivalry and how it helped him acquire tricks he'd be able to use for his other rivals in the future, and there's one aspect of this that kind of stands out to me. you know this bit, right:

this is the thing to me, he becomes so much more proficient at managing momentum. take his 2001 season, he was just kinda doing stuff... panicked a little bit when he had a bad race at the sachsenring until jb talked him off the ledge and reminded him that neither him nor the bike were all that great there. poor thing. and then 2002 and 2003 didn't really have title fights, though I guess 2003 did have a mid-season turning point of sorts when valentino just decided he'd had enough of losing races. which is a nice thing to be able to do, I suppose

but yeah, obviously I already addressed at length how valentino did his whole show at sepang to stop sete's momentum cold, and then how he fatally undermined sete's self-belief and hope and conviction in jerez a few races later - basically stopping that title bid before it even got started. which is all well and good, but... okay, how do you actually manage to make your three most famous overtakes so meaningful? obviously the cause and effect relationship is a bit muddled here - just because they're his most famous overtakes, they're not necessarily his best, and we remember them particularly strongly because they had such a strong impact on his fortunes. but still, when you think about it... sepang was only a turning point that season because of the theatre and not because of the race itself, his overtake in jerez was 100% last minute desperation... but laguna and catalunya? he literally could not have scripted those races more perfectly

both happen at a time when he really, really needs a big win. in 2008, he might have had the points on his side but he sure didn't have the momentum, with casey's three consecutive wins on a ducati that finally seemed well-settled enough to fight for the title and with a lot of strong casey tracks to come. like, he basically wasn't the title favourite any more going into that race - even at the end of laguna one of the commentators still referred to casey as "the man to beat" for the rest of the season. in 2009, the situation was similarly dire. from here (I say like I'm citing something more substantial than my own tumblr posts):

they were both races that valentino went into at a time when he was in serious trouble - but on the flip side they also presented a serious opportunity. both laguna (a race casey must have felt completely certain he would win) and catalunya (jorge's home race) were ones where he could really hurt his rivals. at some point that weekend, whether before the race for casey or before the final corner for jorge, both of them would have been 100% confident they'd win... and valentino stole those victories from right under their noses. and the thing is, right, he couldn't have planned exactly how those races went. first of all because, contrary to whatever the italian public may believe, he is not literally a god. and second of all, the specific overtakes everyone remembers are also ones that inherently had a lot of risk attached to them you'd obviously prefer to avoid. at laguna you have the excursion into the dirt where he needed skill and also quite frankly luck to not crash. catalunya was a last corner overtake - and as we've established, valentino by this point had learned his lesson about leaving it that late if he had any choice in the matter

still, it's not like it was just fate or coincidence or any of that. obviously, he did get lucky that these races unfolded in such a perfect manner for him... but athletes do have a hand in creating their own luck. for laguna, and this is so very much a topic for another post, valentino deliberately deployed tactics to fuck with casey in a way that ended up generating that overtake - without getting into it too much, he basically knew he couldn't allow casey to be ahead going into turn 10 (the corkscrew's turn 8). so if you've decided in advance that come what may, you'll stick your bike in front of your rival's bike in a certain corner... well, if you get lucky, then maybe you can create a little magic. with catalunya, he said afterwards that he'd been imagining that overtake for the whole week before the race. incidentally, according to the commentators jorge had told them that if you're ahead going into the last two corners, you've won the race (which is obviously the kind of thing you should never say, are you insane??) - and that's the key, isn't it. here too, there's a meeting of skill and luck and jorge maybe not being as diligent in protecting the inside line as he should have been (a fact that casey, always polite, full of tact, ever helpful, was willing to repeatedly point out to jorge) and it could have very much ended up with two bikes in the dirt and some awkward conversations within yamaha that evening... but still, at the end of the day, you've got to "invent something" as the commentators put it, you've got to come up with that move and decide it's possible and visualise it again and again before eventually turning it into reality. both of those wins and both of the overtakes everyone remembers were at least to some extent built on tactics and prior planning and valentino deliberately producing something special when he really needed to

the other key bit is, okay, obviously it's not that remarkable that valentino immediately clocked they were important wins, given he'd intended them to be important wins going into the respective races and he knew full well how dramatic the duels had been... but he was still very adept at leaning into the theatre of it all. the idea that valentino came up with the idea of kissing the corkscrew during the race is very funny to me, but it is pretty plausible given he will have had time to do so while coasting at the front after casey's fall. and it's just very memorable, isn't it? sure, that corkscrew overtake helped him win the race, but so did the first lap move into turn 8 or that nifty move on the outside of turn 3 on the lap casey went down. the battle still continued for another twenty odd laps after that corkscrew overtake, but valentino had the shrewd showman's acumen to immediately pinpoint that as the moment of the race, the thing everyone would remember, the defining image, and paid tribute to it in his celebrations to ensure the association would stick in everyone's minds

obviously, he also goes for all kinds of over the top celebrations in catalunya, including wildly ecstatic fist pumping on the bike and breaking out of parc fermé to soak up the adulation of jorge's home fans and all that stuff. and he's a huge fan of the fact he got his 99th career win beating the number 99, because of course he is

also obviously he does that annoying thing where he goes up to both of them while they're doing their interviews so their reactions will be recorded for posterity. so yeah, that's the thing, right... it's about knowing immediately the wins are special and meaningful and signalling with your overblown celebrations how meaningful they are to everyone else so that everyone else is extra sure to remember them and talk about them forever and ever... obviously he got lucky here, obviously it's a little crazy that both those races worked out that well from his perspective. but, y'know. got to hand it to him, I guess. something pretty neat about how both times he went 'yes I am going to change the momentum of the season today'... and he did. plus you've got to give him credit for the fact that he actually capitalised on his momentum, which isn't always easy, and basically took control of both seasons from that point onward (if in different ways and to different extents). he knew he had to take advantage of how his rivals were on the back foot after his daring victories, and he did. you could almost say, right, he knew he had to bite harder when his opponent was already bleedi- *gunshot rings out*

bonus: valencia

so the thing about this whole 'back to back wins with different manufacturers' business is that, understandably, everyone focuses on the welkom side of the equation. very spectacular, very unlikely win, really shouldn't have been possible and somehow valentino did it anyway. but, y'know, that other side of the equation is noteworthy in its own right! he really was crap at valencia. eighth place in his 1999 250cc campaign, his worst result all year when he finished the race (1 dnf that season)... his 2000 title campaign died there when he crashed... eleventh place in 2001, his worst result all year when he finished the race (1 dnf)... in 2002, he got second place there, one of only five races that season he didn't win

but he really, really wanted to win that race in valencia. now, personally, my assumption has always been it was kind of supposed to be a 'fuck you' to honda, which I still completely believe btw. but this is how he himself frames it:

I was the one who worried. Saturday night I took pictures of myself hugging and embracing the RC211V. I wanted to say goodbye to my bike because I knew that tomorrow we would race our last race together. Leaving the RC211V was what hurt most. In fact, I now believe the reason it took me so long to say yes to Yamaha was because I was so attached to that bike. As I looked at the RC211V and thought that we would soon be separated, I genuinely feared that it would take a very long time before I once again tasted victory. That's why I decided I had to win that last race of the 2003 season. It would be a great way of saying goodbye of course, but also I wanted to stock up on victories, I wanted to have the taste of triumph fresh in mind because who knew when I would win again with Yamaha?

which, okay, setting aside for a minute what a freak he is about these bloody bikes, there's two underlying reasons he expresses here for why he's so desperate to win this race. first of all, yes, he really loves that bike and wants to give it the farewell their partnership deserves. and second of all, more poignantly (for the non-bike fuckers anyway), he really did not know when he'd win again. I don't know, it's something that stuck with me... I think we can talk all we like about how big a risk it was and what a step into the unknown it was and nobody believed he could do what he did etc etc, but to me this is just the most straightforward way of capturing that uncertainty. valentino wanting to remember the taste of victory, because he knew he might be giving it up for a long time. he loves winning so, so much, he's done so much over the years to win, he's never been able to stop chasing the high... and yet he walked away from that bike

"I decided I had to win that last race" is in itself funny because obviously a lot of people can't just 'decide' to win races. which, yes, it's just a thing people say, but it does capture the essence of that type of valentino win where it feels like he's won it through sheer force of will. a lot of the times, these are his spite wins - the phillip island 2004's and jerez 2005's of this world - hey, speaking of sete duels, we should include le mans and sachsenring and brno and qatar 2005 as well. various biaggi wins, perhaps most memorably the middle finger race in suzuka 2001 and his last lap overtake in phillip island 2001, where he won his first premier class title. when he beats spaniards in dramatic battles at catalunya like 2004, 2005, 2009, 2016. his fury at his penalty at phillip island 2003 that results in that spectacular fifteen second margin over the field. his desire to fuck with jorge in motegi/sepang 2010. let's throw in his dominant win in jerez 2016 in enemy territory, the first race win he'd had of that nature since... oof, let me have a think, maybe assen 2009? (incidentally, the race that directly followed catalunya.) like, man, this is not how he was winning races post-prime, it was always one hell of a struggle - with one glaring exception

which makes it worth pointing out that the second and indeed last time he won in valencia was in 2004, when he was in the process of dismantling sete. now, given sete ended up finishing fourth, it wasn't strictly necessary to get the win to ensure the curse continued doing its thing. but, y'know, there was a point where sete was in front of valentino on-track. then sete tries to overtake biaggi, pretty firmly it has to be said, and pushes them both wide allowing valentino to sweep right on through, which I found pretty funny icl. anyway, the best way to ensure your rival doesn't win a race is to win it yourself, right? after the frustration of qatar, he reacted by winning the last three races of the season spurred on by sheer spite. no wonder he took notes and learned a little something about how to best motivate himself

bonus 2: things that aged badly

october 2003, mind you. he really got those guys good

bonus 3: dovi

I mean, come on. it is a little bit funny that both valentino and marc acquire a new rival at age 24 seemingly out of nowhere who was their main rival for three years. (I don't care what the championship standings say, marco melandri was not valentino's main rival in 2005 - sete might have been extremely cursed but those were still The Battles that year.) said rival was 6-7 years older than them, known for being a particularly smart rider and a wet weather specialist, and announced themselves as a major threat in large part through winning two dramatic last lap duels against the all time great in the first year of that rivalry. both rivalries were (well, initially in valentino's case) notable for being significantly warmer on an interpersonal level than the ATG's previous major rivalry

both had previously been hrc riders but had been fired by the team. gibernau had one premier class win before 2003, dovi had two before 2017, and all three of those wins came in the wet. ofc dovi did have a bit more pedigree - the 125cc title, stronger results in the premier class, considerably more podiums. but both dovi and gibernau weren't really supposed to be the main rival to the ATG, not even within their own team - though, obviously, the reasons why they ended up assuming that mantle couldn't have been more different. with both of them, people said they'd changed their approach to riding, mainly in terms of their mentality - and that it had helped them grow into their new role as the primary challenger

there's not really a point here... I just think it's neat. obviously it is a little funny how differently those respective relationships unfolded, but I also wouldn't say it's fair to entirely pin that on the personalities involved, as opposed to circumstantial factors. that being said

#valentino rossi #//#vr46 #sg15 #this post is very much just throwing stuff at the wall. lightly edited brainstorming from my notes #heartwarming: tumblr user proves they are capable of editing their essay-length posts by showing way worse was possible #no wonder I answer asks at a snail's pace... sorry if you've sent me something. may take a while #batsplat responds #heretic tag #curse tag

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amageish · 11 months

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People seemed to like my post chronicling the queer history of Felicia Hardy, so I'm going to do something similar to that... Let's chat about the queer history of Marvel's unwitting power couple, Ellie Phimister and her girlfriend Yuki Ohara.

Let's dive in!

Content Warning: This summary will include discussion of anti-mutant hate crimes and genocide, as that is part of Ellie's comic book story.

Like a lot of queer X-Men stories, this one begins with queercoding in the 80s.

While Jim Shooter famously prohibited any queer storytelling in Marvel Comics during his tenure as Editor-in-Chief of the company and, on top of that, the Comics Code Authority also banned it, Chris Claremont, the architect of the X-Men as we know them today, never really followed those rules - and neither did his editors, artists, and co-writers. There are so many queer-coded relationships throughout his runs on the X-Men and the modern X-Men stories are still playing catch-up to this day, canonizing the intentions of him and his collaborators one character at a time. Mystique and Destiny are probably his most famous pairing nowadays, as that is canon now, but he also wrote the Juggernaut as being with Black Tom Cassidy, Kate Pryde as being bisexual for most women she encounters in her life, and, the topic for today, Storm being in a romantic relationship with the Japanese assassin Yukio.

Yukio is, to put it mildly, a risk-taker. She runs through life with seemingly no self-preservation instincts whatsoever and, for some reason, always gets by nonetheless. She and Storm have a fling while Storm is in Japan (Uncanny X-Men 172-173) and this leads directly into Storm's famous punk era, which certainly does recontextualize some of the vibes of her having suddenly gotten a mohawk and a taste for leather.

Their later reunion in Uncanny X-Men 311-313 is extra funny to me - both because of the narration textually referring to them as "more then friends" and because of Yukio justifying her daredevil attitude by suggesting it would have been "politically incorrect" of the villain to have attacked them in public.

These two "kindred spirits" hang out for a bit, but Yukio is ultimately a Wolverine character and not a larger X-Men team member, so they naturally split off as time goes on. Their last appearance together was during the 2014 Death of Wolverine event - though their affair was mentioned by an angry Kitty during the Storm flashback mini earlier this year.

That said, Yukio is obviously a Sapphic and I guess when the team behind the movie Deadpool 2 decided to give their version of Negasonic Teenage Warhead a girlfriend, they looked at the list of queer-coded characters and decided she was the right one for them...

Now, as for Ellie...

Eloise Phimister AKA Negasonic Teenage Warhead debuted in Grant Morrison's New X-Men, but her name was not said on-panel until after she was already dead. She was one of Emma Frost's students, a gothic woman with telepathic powers that foretold the death of her and her classmates at Genosha... and yet she died nonetheless.

This is a very tragic character. She has a silly name, but that is part of the heartbreak of this moment. Ellie is a child who died as a result of a genocidal desire to kill all mutants. Her silly name emphasizes her youth... which makes it REALLY tonally dissonant when it played for comedy from here-on-out.

She was briefly brought back by the camp gay villain Selene when she revived horrific versions of many deceased mutants as part of X-Force... and then she was revived for real with a new design fter the release of the first Deadpool movie. She maintains her precognitive abilities and future-sight here, but otherwise... Well, she's now a comedy character in a Deadpool book. She also can warp reality now, partially as an explanation for why she looks/acts different then her first appearances.

She paled around with Deadpool for a bit, but didn't do anything explicitly queer in the comics until 2022 (good god) where she kissed an unnamed woman, causing Wolverine to wonder if she'll one day lead a X-Men team that is exclusively made up of her multiple girlfriends. This comment is also a subtle not to the implied status quo of the Krakoa era, where Wolverine himself has two partners - dating both Jean Grey and Scott Summers.

This is a funny moment, though I do wonder why it took so long for her to be queer in the comics - Marvel comic books are generally the most queer media Marvel puts out, so I do wonder if it was something specifically about her being a Deadpool character that caused people to hesitate to greenlight queer stories about her.

Finally, in 2023, Ellie got her first solo series in the form of an Infinity Comic.

This series uses the increasingly-popular approach of having "fate" be a stand-in for "the concept of being a loyal adaptation in a multimedia landscape," as she is fated to kiss a girl named Yuki Ohara or else the fabric of reality as we know it will be destroyed.

While Deadpool is only in it for a bit, it is a very meta narrative, with a lot of commentary on the way that female characters are written in comics in general and female reality-warpers specifically, with Ellie having a lot of anxiety about the risk of her becoming like Jean Grey or Scarlet Witch - not helped by the TVA chasing her down and declaring her a threat. However, in the end, she meets her girlfriend-to-be and pauses time itself to get know her properly before having their universe-saving kiss. Good for them!

Since then, she has appeared exactly once - in a Pride issue fashion show - but I imagine she and her girlfriend Yuki are just in a little reality-warp bubble, hidden away as Fall of X finishes up.

Synergy is a dirty word in the comics landscape, but I personally like Ellie and her romance with Yuki - and I'm very relieved that they introduced a new, younger Yuki O. based on the movie for her to date instead of just retconning the established Yukio into becoming Eloise's girlfriend... Storm doesn't deserve to have her girl stolen away like that!

Also, Yuki has a giant mech and electricity powers. Maybe a little cliche for a Japanese character's powerset, but it is badass...

I hope we see more comic book stuff with these two eventually... There is potential there that is as of yet untapped - especially as they are probably two of Marvel's most notable queers by virtue of being in wildly popular movies, even if their comic queerness is a relatively modern thing.

#negasonic teenage warhead #negasonic x yukio #yukio #yuki ohara #storm #storm x yukio

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saintsenara · 5 months

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the wizarding world really just does not care about anything huh? i mean. what would have happened if tom had been institutionalized due to his magic?

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

i need to actually get around to writing the big meta i have on the idea - which i know a few people have asked me about - that hogwarts applies some level of selection [that is, that - despite what lupin says in deathly hallows - it doesn't teach the majority of magical children in britain, whether they're born to magical or muggle families] when it comes to who it admits, and that muggleborn potential pupils who fall short of its criteria never get the letter-delivery meeting that we see the canonical tom riddle receive.

which would mean that, had tom been committed to a psychiatric hospital as a child, i think the wizarding world would have quietly struck his name off the list for potential admittance to hogwarts and continued on untroubled.

which is obviously grim.

although i think it's worth saying that, while there is a lot about 1930s psychiatric care which was legitimately inhumane - and the sort of one flew over the cuckoo's nest-style dystopian vibe, which makes the idea of poor wee tom being stuck in a hospital seem so terrifying, isn't entirely inaccurate - there's also, as odd as it sounds, a chance that he might have been genuinely helped by the psychiatric treatment of the time period.

we picture the psychiatric treatment of the early twentieth century as straitjackets and padded cells and lobotomies - violent and dehumanising procedures with no clinical benefit - because [as is often the case today in the way mental illness is spoken about both clinically and culturally] the medical community tended to regard anything accompanied by psychosis [schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, bipolar disorder, and so on] as intensive, untreatable and unmanageable [and to - therefore - institutionalise patients with these symptoms permanently].

but at the same time, mental illness which wasn't accompanied by [long-term] psychosis [depression, anxiety disorders, addiction, ptsd and so on] was increasingly seen not only as treatable, but as curable - and clinicians' aims were for patients to be treated temporarily either in the community or in modern hospitals which looked very different from the padded-cell asylums which were holdovers of the victorian/edwardian era, and to live independently after their course of treatment was done.

this was largely due to the prevalence of "shell-shock" and "soldiers' neuroses" - which we would nowadays understand as types of post-traumatic stress disorder - among men who had served in the first world war. these men - often from "respectable" backgrounds, with no history of mental illness in their families - were a very different demographic of patient than either the destitute "lunatic" or the hysterical woman of the victorian and edwardian imagination. they were also needed back in the trenches - but with their symptoms under control enough that they weren't considered dangerous to their fellow soldiers.

and treatments for shell-shock were - as a result - considerably more humane than the contemporary treatment of psychosis. emphasis was put on holistic treatments - especially the chance for men who had been shivering in the trenches to get a period of real rest - and on talking.

[british army officers were ordered - for example - to attempt to reduce shell-shock cases by encouraging their men to process their experiences of the war in individual and group settings.]

after the end of the war, the treatment of long-term shell-shock combined with the growing interest in "analysis" - which, while the image i'm sure many of us have of it is of sigmund freud suggesting the patient wanted to fuck his own mother, actually looked rather a lot like the various branches of psychotherapy do today - into courses of treatment for conditions like depression, anxiety, and ptsd [especially those caused by childhood trauma] which aren't actually terrible...

the way the young tom riddle speaks about magic in canon absolutely sounds like psychosis to someone who doesn't know he's a wizard - and so, yes, there is a very high chance that he would have been institutionalised to be stuck in restraints for the rest of his life.

but it's also the case that, since he was a child when mrs cole was trying to have him "looked at" by doctors, this increasing disciplinary focus on the psychological motivations for behaviour - especially in childhood; child psychology and the causes of juvenile delinquency were things the psychiatric community was increasingly interested in during the 1930s - might, instead, have had his belief that he could do magic put down to a fantasy which he had invented on account of his numerous [and treatable] neuroses.

and while it's not the case that he's making up being a wizard... it very much is the case that he's neurosis-central. you've never seen a more unbalanced ego.

and that actually being prompted to confront his childhood trauma [especially his grief over his mother's death] - even when the strange, freudian flavour any psychotherapy would undoubtedly have had is taken into account - would probably have done rather more to actually help him than hogwarts' "ignoring children's emotional needs is fine" approach...

#asks answered #asenora meta #tom riddle #lord voldemort #on medicine #the tl;dr of this is that there's a huge amount of presentism in the way the history of medicine is talked about #people have always been treated and they have always been helped by that treatment #and this can coexist with the fact that other people have been harmed by the treatments to which they were subjected

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issuesdolly · 4 months

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Surprising Jonathan Davis with "Groupie Rolepay"

Warning: explicit/sensitive content, deviant theme, 18+ Smut. Male/female sex (romantic boyfriend/girlfriend theme + BDSM "stranger play" roleplay theme) foreplay, fingering, oral sex, blowjob, handjob, unprotected sex, rough sex, p in v, praise & degradation, edging/denial, fear kink, adrenaline kink, .. Overall, A WILD RIDE AGAIN 🤣💀

#jonathandavis #jonathan davis #korn #jon davis #fanfic #jondavis #fanfiction #smut #fem reader #x reader #bdsmplay #bdsmkink #edging kink #praise and degredation #edging #degredation kink #degredation #edging #edginganddenial #fear kink #bdsmkink #adrenalinekink #female reader #make me masturbate #make me cvm #korn #numetal

Summary: You are Jonathan’s girlfriend and it’s the evening of one of his first solo tour gigs. After some nervous sexual tension between him and female fans, you inquire about whether or not he ever misses the casual hookups he used to do back in the day. He admits he does miss it at times. You decide to play “the stranger game” with him, giving him a kinky surprise as you roleplay as a groupie/stranger who desperately wants one encounter with him after his show. He plays along and takes you as he would a groupie back in the day, just for fun/nostalgia-sake.

Preface: In real life, Jonathan described the tone of his solo tours as more “laid back/vibey” and “for the chicks,” as he put it in one interview:

He’s been pretty open about his shows being an intentionally more seductive/intimate experience of him. A “treat” for female fans if you will. For ME, it certainly was lol. Lot of people adored his solo tour for the simple reason it was musically phenomenal. But as a woman, that tour was like witnessing an even sexier/more relaxed side of Jonathan than when he played with Korn. Loved the idea of a fic where Y/N and Jon hook up after one of his solo shows.

But as a twist, Jon and Y/N decide to make it a kinky “game.” Y/N roleplays for Jonathan as an infatuated female stranger. For those unfamiliar with the concept, the BDSM kink called “the stranger game,” is where consenting partners role play and pretend to be strangers meeting for the first time. From there, they play out a dirty/kinky scenario in their “roles.” In this game, Y/N roleplays as a cheap/thirsty groupie and Jon roleplays as his colder/former, more promiscuous self. He hooks up with Y/N the way he would seduce/use a woman after a gig back in the day.

In Jonathan Davis's real life interview with Penthouse, he talked about some of the more messed up BDSM play he would do with freakier women back in the day. So…. this story is a bit less “romantic” lol. But y’all know I’m deviant sometimes…. Plus A LOT of folks begged me for a story where Y/N acts more like a stranger who hooks up with him. So … WHY NOT? Lol

Story: It was mid-afternoon on one of the first tour dates in Jonathan’s solo tour. You were with him at the hotel nearby the venue he would be performing at soon. Allowed to come along and sit backstage while he performed, you were excited/proud of him. His solo tour had a completely different vibe than his Korn tour. The venues were more intimate, the crowd was more appreciative of just him, and the female audience was even more “receptive.”

It was the kind of experience where the orchestral arrangements allowed the very best of Jonathan��s voice/stage presence to shine through. Intimate lighting, pianos, jazz musicians, world music drums, world renowned violinist and Jonathan’s voice cutting through with incredible edge. Audience seated and Jonathan performing seated, it let everyone take in the best of him and connect with him even closer.

The audience it drew was obviously more interested in just Jonathan. Even more captivating than his theatrical/headbanging stage presence, this tour had the audience more in stunned silence than freaking out. He was a true musician, as well as one hell of a male “siren.” Sitting in his chair, singing in a mix of emotional, arousing, and guttural tones, it was like he cast a spell.

Watching him getting ready…he looked phenomenal….

Rounding the corner to the hotel bathroom near the wardrobe closet of your deluxe suite, Jonathan was putting on his black leather shoes and completing his look. Dressed in a black pinstripe suit complete with waistcoat and bright red neck tie, in contrast with his unkempt, long jet black hair and dark eyes, he looked like a sexy vampire. You giggled, knowing full well that was his aim for his performance aesthetic. His solo tour was a real treat…. So naturally he was dressed like a “treat” as well.

“God baby, you look so incredible,” you admitted.

Jonathan looked over at you with a huge, awkward smile.

“Thanks sweetie… “ Jon said nervously. He grimaced a little and stared back at his reflection with some self-doubt. It was adorable to you that he was still insecure about his appearance. If ONLY he could see himself as others did.

Jon stepped over to you, admitting he was still more than a bit nervous. You gave him a hug and held him tightly, feeling the soft, well-made fabric of his fancy outfit against you as you embraced him.

“You’re gonna kill it, baby, I know you will,” you said, encouragingly.

“I hope so…. We’ve been rehearsing like crazy…. But it’s still a lot more improvisational,” Jon replied in a slightly shaky voice.

You let him out of the hug but kept your hands on his waist, just taking in his incredible appearance.

“Oh trust me… they’re gonna love it,” you said, smiling at him and eyeing him up and down.

The two of you stood pressed close together for a moment as Jon played with your hair and let you gawk at him in his sexy outfit.

“Damn… those ladies are gonna cream their seats,” you teased.

Jon let out his naughtiest chuckle, cracking a wider grin.

“You think so?” Jon teased in return.

You gently smacked his shoulder and let out some more laughter.

“We both know so,” you admitted, shaking your head.

There was awkward silence as Jon looked at the mirror and checked out his tie again. You were feeling very turned on, looking at him in this outfit and knowing he was going to drive the audience (and you) crazy that night with his performance. Eventually you spoke.

“Jon?” you said, softly.

“Mmmm?” Jon said, distracted.

“Do you ever miss it? The…. hooking up? Getting whoever you wanted?” you asked, genuinely curious.

There was dead silence as Jon froze, staring at the mirror and being very afraid to answer your question.

“Um….pfft…” Jon stammered, cracking an embarrassed smile and shaking his head, lost for words.

You couldn’t help but smile and laugh, knowing full well he LOVED the fiery/passionate encounters he had back in the day. Women were/are desperate and FULL of lust for just one encounter with him.

“Um…. I really don’t know if you can handle my honest answer….” Jon muttered, smile fading as he began to wince….

“Honestly, I don’t blame you if the answer is yes,” you replied, earnestly.

Jon nervously twisted some of his hair, staying silent, worried you were about to get really pissed off.

“You can tell me the truth, Jon. I’m not insecure like before. I bet some of those hookups were insanely hot,” you admitted. .

Jon didn’t know how to answer your question without hurting your feelings. He eventually spoke.

“I mean…..ugh…. If you want brutal honesty… yes,” Jon whispered in an apologetic voice.

“I was fucking addicted to it. I couldn’t get enough. The aftermath sucked though. How I felt about myself. How it made my girl at the time feel… it… it’s- that’s an awful feeling,” Jonathan continued as he shook his head. You nodded your head, taking in his words.

“But if you’re asking what it felt like in the MOMENT, yeah…. It was….” Jon’s voice trailed off. There was silence for a moment.

“I get it…” you said, quietly.

Jon couldn’t even look at you. He fidgeted with his hair more intensely and stared at the ground, shifting his feet around. Some of those "hotter"encounters were clearly replaying in his mind. Just thinking about how badly some women had wanted him and what they’d been willing to do for him was insane. He was trying hard not to crack a huge grin just “reminiscing.”

The crazy things they’d do to meet him, the level of arousal they felt for him, and the way they’d let him do ANYTHING to them was still very arousing to recall. Many were very beautiful women, from all over the world. Jon had to stop himself from losing his train of thought. He cleared his throat and tried to stop thinking about that. He re-focused his attention on you, fearing your reaction to his words.

“I’m sorry if hearing that hurts. SERIOUSLY. You just have to understand…. I’ve had some really crazy times. It’s not a lifestyle I want back…. But if you want the truth… yeah… a LOT of those experiences really got me off. I’m sorry,” Jon admitted, apologetically.

You understood. At this point in your relationship, you were secure enough with things to just appreciate hearing the truth.

“It’s really understandable, Jon. I’m not mad,” you replied, reassuringly.

Jon stared at you nervously. He was waiting for your anger/jealousy to have some kind of delayed fuse. But you truly weren’t pissed. You didn’t want to give him “a pass” to hook up again… But you did wish you could do something to give him a hint of that “experience” again. The “fun” part of it at least. As you stood, reflecting on that idea, Jon apprehensively walked over to you.

Gingerly touching your hair and stroking your chin, he forced eye contact with you. He nervously searched your face, hoping to reassure you in some way.

“I’m serious, hun. I don’t wanna lose you. I love you. That stupid temporary ‘high’ isn’t worth it anymore” Jon reiterated. He figured he had really hurt you with his answer.

“Jon, really…. It’s ok, I would have rather you tell me the truth. I love you too. We’re good. Okay? Just go out there tonight and give those ladies what they want,” you replied, winking.

Jon cracked a naughty smile and brought you in for a hug and kiss. He gave you a slow, passionate kiss. He let his tongue do the apologizing for him as he opened his mouth against yours. He pressed seductively against you, cradling your lower body. You returned his kiss as he spent a moment feeling you up and wrapping his arms around the small of your back…. then down towards your ass. He squeezed and caressed your ass for a moment, letting out gentle “mm” noises against your mouth as he pushed his tongue more into your mouth.

The two of you knew you had to stop. He was all “fixed up” for the show and the chauffeur car to the venue would be arriving soon. He slowly inhaled some new air and reluctantly let go of you. Jon looked nervous and sexually frustrated now. He tried to compose himself, knowing he had to focus on the actual musicianship he planned to showcase tonight. You reached up as tall as you could and stroked some rogue black hair out of his face before speaking.

“You look amazing…. And you’re gonna do great. I know it,” you whispered. Exchanging warm smiles, Jon slowly Jon stepped out of the master closet and towards the bedroom doorway.

“Thank you sweetheart. You’re amazing. I’m gonna get my shit together and wait in the bedroom. I’ll let you finish getting ready, ok?” Jon questioned.

“Yeah, let me get my shit together too. I’ll be there in a minute,” you replied, collecting yourself.

Your eyes moved around the bathroom dress closet, you decided what you were going to wear. It was a semi-formal event. Even though you’d be backstage, a mid-length long sleeved goth lace dress with a deep plunging neck paired with some red and black heels would be a very good look. Matching his classy goth/dressy outfit. You put that on and paired it with a red, purple and black beaded necklace. As you finished your look and put makeup on, an idea occurred to you. You had NO idea if your idea would play out well… but depending on Jon’s mood after the show, you started devising a kinky plan.

The two of you had tried numerous “role play” games together, but you’d never surprised Jon by initiating one. You always let him take the lead. However, you knew Jon was freaky enough to pick up on a “role play” game if you opted to initiate one. Generally, after all Jon’s shows, he is amped up on adrenaline, elated by the positive energy he gets from pleasing a crowd.

You reflected on WHY it must have been so intoxicating for Jonathan to hookup with thirsty groupies back in the day. The mix of adrenaline/joy after a good show, combined with the groupy’s unrelenting pursuits and willingness to do ANYTHING for him was probably awesome. The high of a good show followed by a sexual high must have been incredible. Contemplating that… you began wondering if a kinky surprise after Jon’s show might be just the release he needed.

As you reflected on this, your eyes moved to your luggage bag. In it, you had more “sexy time” clothes. All the stuff you wore just for him. The lingerie, fetish/roleplay outfits, and so forth. You quietly started digging through it. There were some recently purchased outfits Jonathan had not even seen you in yet. Among them was a short purple and black plaid goth/schoolgirl style miniskirt with chains and a black lace hem. There was also a black sleeveless camisole with a bodice/lace up front that exposed a ton of cleavage. There were also thigh-high black stockings and a new matching dark purple lace bra/panty set. Also, a black satin choker necklace.

The clothes were so lightweight and flimsy, you knew you could easily stuff the whole “outfit” in your purse and bring it with you to the venue. Jon would be none the wiser. You hid the items in a zip compartment of your mid-size black purse. You also brought some makeup remover and gothier/sluttier makeup and stuff it into the purse compartment.

Your plan, should it work out, was this:

Towards the end of his show, you would leave your spot backstage, change into the naughty outfit in the bathroom of his private dressing room…. Wait until he is alone…. and “surprise him.” But, you would not “surprise” him as his girlfriend. You would pretend to be a groupie…. If Jon happened to be in the mood for your game, you were going to let him pretend you were just another infatuated female desperate for a shot with him. Give him a taste of his “fond” dirty memories. You were afraid of actually going through with this idea. But, after that chat you had with Jon, you had a feeling he might respond quite well to your surprise. Especially if the female energy at that show left him a bit sexually frustrated.

He gets PLENTY of “I fucking LOVE you” catcalls during shows. And in a smaller, well-lit venue, Jon would be looking directly at the faces of hundreds of beautiful women, sitting closer to him and staring HARD back at him. He took his music/performance art seriously. But tonight, in this intimate setting, it would be even harder for Jon to not notice the admiring/aroused faces in the crowd.

Meeting Jon in the living room, you exchanged warm smiles. He looked at your refined-sexy black dress/necklace and shoes. Jon’s eyes lit up as he saw your outfit.

“You look incredible, hun,” Jon complimented, in a soft voice.

“Thank you sweetie. So do too… but… you know that,” you replied, giving him a sly grin and nudge on the arm.

He let out a dark chuckle, and wrapped a hand around the small of your back.

“Our ride is here. You ready?” Jon asked.

“Yeah, definitely ready,” you replied, excited (about everything). You mainly wanted the show to be fantastic. You knew he was nervous, but you had total faith in him.

The two of you held hands and climbed in the back of the chauffeur car. Jon let out some nervous breathing on the way to the venue. He was tense, and the ride was fairly quiet. You just held his hand and sat next to him in the car. Getting into the venue through a back entrance, the two of you had to part company as Jon began preparing backstage.

“Ok hun, here we go,” Jon said in a tense voice, giving you a big, nervous smile.

“You’ve got this! I love you, baby!” you replied.

“I love you too, sweetheart,” Jonathan said softly. The two of you gave each other one final passionate kiss and hug before you had to part company and let him get going.

Jon walked off, initiated conversations with his stage managers and fellow musicians. A chair and refreshment table was available for you backstage. You took your seat, watching the chaos of last minute adjustments as stage techs swarmed around. Looking at the crowd gathering as the venue filled, you could clearly see the women pouring in before other concert attendees. Disproportionately, women had purchased tickets as close to the stage as possible. Almost the entire front/middle section of the audience was lined with women racing to their assigned seats and waiting with tense anticipation and giddy energy.

You had to laugh. It was just as you suspected. But you were comfortable enough with your relationship with Jon to just shake your head and smile. If you weren’t with him, you would DEFINITELY be in one of those closer assigned seats. You were giddy also, deeply looking forward to watching him perform. You felt jolts of adrenaline as you prepared yourself to see him in his element.

As the show opened, people were already going wild. Jon’s pace of songs was unrelenting. No long pauses between songs. No long unnecessary speeches. Just one AMAZING, energetic performance. You watched the audience reactions as they rotated from captivated to thrilled, to aroused… or just rocking out. You giggled to yourself as women jumped out of their seats and screamed from time to time as they forgot it wasn’t a “rock venue.” No matter how often you watch Jonathan perform, it still captivated you the same way as well. You couldn’t take your eyes off him, and watching his raw emotion had you just as blown away.

When you heard the band start the instrumental version of “Last Legal Drug (Le Petit Mort)” you knew it was going to be HOT. Those female audience members weren’t the only ones creaming their seats. Your panties began dripping, hearing him vocally seduce the audience and throw his head back towards the end of the song. With his legs splayed and head tilted back, he basically mimicked an orgasm on stage whenever he performed this song. You heard wild screams as Jon opened his mouth, pretending to gasp for air with that blissful “climax” face.

Knowing what he looks like when having a real orgasm, your heart was pounding as you watched him mimic THAT aspect of his true self for a whole crowd. He was a VERY sexual man. You considered placing your trench coat over your lap and rubbing your pussy a little as you watched him. Instead you just sat on your heel a bit, restraining yourself. But your clit was hard watching him “please” the crowd. By the end of his set list, you were extremely aroused. You figured it was time to slip out of your spot backstage and initiate your plan.

You scurried off to the private dressing room and got into the bathroom. Removing your refined makeup, you put on the exaggerated, sexy/goth makeup and the choker. Quickly you ripped off your dress and zipped up the goth miniskirt, putting the stockings and skimpy lace front camisole on. Hiding in the bathroom, your heart pounded, hoping this idea played out well. As you heard wild applause and the show wrapping up…. You just let time pass. Eventually, you heard Jonathan enter the private dressing room with several people from his entourage. Your phone was in your hand. After some time of overhearing Jon chatting with his team, you began receiving texts from Jon.

“Where are you?” Jon texted.

You didn’t reply at first. In short order you got another text.

“Are you okay? I’m in the dressing room. I’ll be here waiting,” Jon texted again.

You figured you’d better say something. He was getting concerned.

“I’m in here too,” you replied.

Jonathan sent several “???” question marks as a text.

You felt stupid at this point, unsure how to execute your plan. You figured a good starting point was to get the two of you ALONE in this dressing room. You sent him a text:

“I’m in the bathroom. Can I talk to you alone for a minute?” you inquired in a text.

“Sure, one sec,” Jon replied, confused. You overheard him tell his team he needs some time alone in the room or words to that effect. You heard people gradually file out and the room grow quiet. Then you heard footsteps approach the bathroom door before a knock.

“Baby? Is everything ok?” you heard Jon ask, concerned. Your heart was pounding out of your chest, TRULY hoping this was not a stupid idea. Slowly, you opened the bathroom door and stood in the doorway. As Jon saw you, his expression went from confused to completely taken aback. He had figured something was wrong and THAT was why you needed to be alone with him. You gave him a huge, naughty grin, as you slowly stepped towards him in the doorway.

“Um…. that’s…. quite the wardrobe change, babe,” Jon said, aroused and confused. You decided to start roleplaying…. Hoping Jon is freaky enough to just “pick up” on it. In a sultry, unfamiliar voice, you began:

“I’m sorry… I know I’m not supposed to be back here,” you began.

Jon was baffled for a moment.

“I just had to meet you,” you admitted in a giddy tone.

Jon was still totally lost.

“MEET me?” he repeated.

“Yes…. I snuck past security. I couldn’t take it. I had to see you,” you continued. You let your body language RADIATE sexual frustration. Jon stared at your eyes, as it slowly started to click for him.

“I had to know what it would feel like to see you in person” you continued in a nervous, quavering voice.

Slowly, very slowly, it was beginning to make sense for Jon. You let out some fast, nervous breathing. You let your eyes grow as seductive as possible. Finally, Jonathan fully realized your roleplay game. You were pretending to be a groupie who’d snuck in, desperate for him. Cracking a half smile/half smirk, Jon folding his arms in front of him, eyeing you up and down. He leaned his body more against the doorway and let out a dark chuckle.

Jon had a lot of sweat dripping from his hair, face and clothes. He’d given his all during that show. He was already on a “high” from that, but after realizing what you’re up to, it didn’t take him long to decide he was DEFINITELY up for your freaky game. His smile broadened. He gazed at you with animalistic eyes. He no longer looked at you as he would his girlfriend. Jon gave you his naughtiest “fuck me” eyes with a hint of cold indifference. He lulled his head against the doorway and let out a seductive sigh as he gave you the up/down “assessment” for “would I fuck her?” The same way he’d contemplate it back in the day with a stranger. You returned his sly gaze with infatuated/excitable eyes and a nervous smile.

Eventually, Jon spoke:

“Soooo… you just snuck past security, huh?” Jon teased.

You gave a slow, sexy nod.

“Bullshit baby,” Jon said in a low voice, giving you a wicked grin.

“How’d you really manage it?” Jon inquired.

“Umm… I may have given a few favors,” you said in a naughty tone.

“Hmmm… yeah that sounds more like the truth,” Jon teased. The two of you eyed each other as you continued to pretend to be strangers. Jon cleared his throat.

“What’s your name, babe?” Jon asked, softly.

“Emilia,” you replied. Jon cracked an even more devilish grin. “Emilia” was the name of a very young, extremely horny female fan who got carried away at a Meet and Greet a few months ago when she met him. Jonathan was getting very aroused as he realized your plan was to let him make you “Emilia” for the night. His body language got more sexually aggressive.

“Well…. It’s nice to meet you, Emilia,” Jon said in a sexy voice. He outstretched his hand and gave you a handshake. You shook his hand and didn’t give it back to him, holding onto it as long as possible. Jon didn’t let go of your hand either. Instead, he gripped it firmly and slowly started pulling you closer to him by the arm. You let out a soft moan, genuinely aroused as he pulled you into him.

“It’s okay baby, you can give me a hug if you want,” Jon cooed, holding onto your hand and pulling you into him. You let out a giddy moan as you pressed up against him, giving him the naughtiest hug possible. You squeezed his upper body and pressed your short skirt against his lower body, letting your crotches rub together. Jonathan was getting more aroused. It did slightly feel like he was meeting someone new… someone DESPERATE for him. You slowly slid away from him, but kept ahold of his hand.

“You have no idea how bad I wanted to meet you,” you said softly.

“Ha… um.. I’m getting that sense,” Jon replied in a sly tone, playing with his hair and slowly letting go of your hand. You let there be awkward silence. Jon eyed you up and down more with a naughty grin.

“Normally, I wouldn’t let someone just fucking hang out back here. You seduced security and hid in my room. That’s pretty fucked up,” Jon repromanded.

“I know…. You must think I’m crazy,“ you said apologetically. “ I don’t normally do shit like this. I have just never wanted to meet anyone so badly,” you whined.

Jonathan folded his arms again, shifting from side to side in the doorway and licking his lips, watching you.

“Yeah it’s pretty crazy…. But… I get it. You had to know what it would feel like, huh?” Jonathan teased.

“Yeah,” you whispered, staring hard at him with “fuck me” eyes.

Jon cleared his throat again.

“Well, if you wanna hang out for a minute, I guess it’s ok with me,” Jon said softly.

Jon took slow steps towards you and threw an arm over your shoulder. Leading you to the couch, he sat you down next to him. You moaned and shook as Jon faced you, letting his face and body get closer to yours. There was more silence as your breathing picked up, along with Jon’s.

“Guess you’re just back here for a nice heart to heart chat, hmm?” Jon teased. The two of you let out nervous laughter and you refrain from replying. As he smiled at you, he moved his hand from your shoulder downward towards your breast. You moaned more, trying to compose yourself. Jon’s hand stopped just above your nipple, gently rubbing your skin. Eventually, you spoke:

“I mean….. I didn’t know if you’d like me or…just kick me out! Haha. I just want…. Anything,” you admitted. Jon groaned, looking down at your legs in the short skirt and then back towards your breasts. He slowly put his other hand between your knees and rubbed them.

“Anything?” Jon whispered.

“Yeah…. We can hang out…. Or… talk, or…… “ (you took the hand Jon had on your knees and gently pushed it higher on your legs towards your thighs) … “or anything,” you whispered into his ear. Jon let out a dark chuckle as he rubbed his hand between your thighs.

“I just want…. Anything….” you whispered again, right into his ear.

Jon’s dick was firming up. His face/hair was still wet with sweat from the show. He had already sweated considerably into his clothes from the exertion of performing as well. He groaned a bit as he pretended to “contemplate.”

“Anything hmm? Well…I don’t fucking know you…. But, if I’m being honest, you look like one hell of a treat,” Jon complimented in a low, dirty voice. He slowly pulled one of your knees towards him and parted your legs. With his other hand, he gingerly touched your breast, letting his fingers graze your nipple. You shook more.

“I want you,” you admitted in a shaky voice. You got bold and grabbed Jon’s hand, aggressively pulling it between your legs and further towards your pussy.

Jon let you ease his hand between your stocking-clad thighs and find your pussy. You had your slutty lingerie on. You let Jon lift up your little skirt and gawk at your panties as he stared at your lap with a more evil grin.

“Fuck….. you came prepared,” Jon teased. You giggled and nodded.

Jon slowly lowered your skirt and stopped touching you. He decided to tease you more and make you work for it. Taking his hands off you, he slid away from you on the couch and splayed his legs, bouncing his knee and staring at you more. You let there be tension. Jon stared down at his lap again… then back up at your face, tilting his head more and locking eyes.

“So tell me babe, what do you think about when you think of me?” Jon inquired (knowingly).

“Well… ahem… I think you’re amazing….” you started….

“And?” Jon asked in a sly voice.

“And…. sexy as hell,” you admitted.

Jon gave you a dark, naughty stare before gently poking a finger into the cleavage of your flimsy shirt. Gently pulling you towards him by the front of your shirt, he smirked more at you.

“AND?” Jon said in a low, taunting voice.

“And I just wanted to know….” your words trailed off.

“Say it,” Jon teased, smiling.

“I wanted to know….what you’d feel like,” you admitted, looking at the ground.

Jon slowly nodded while smirking more.

“Hmmm…And how do I feel to you so far?” Jon asked, reaching a hand into your shirt and caressing your breast while lulling his head against the couch.

“Amazing,” you whispered.

“So come here,” Jon whispered in reply. You nervously huddled against him as he moved his hand around inside your shirt. He placed his other hand back between your knees. Jon worked his way up to the elastic of your thigh high stockings before teasingly pulling at them.

He leaned in, pressing his wet, sweaty face/hair against your cheek.

“How far do ya wanna go?” Jon asked in a sultry voice.

“Um…..I’m embarrassed to even say,” you replied, voice shaking. Jon slid a hand higher between your thighs, stopping just short of your pussy. He leaned his face against your ear and breathed against it for a moment. He smelled your hair and teasingly nuzzled your neck/ear. Your nipples hardened and your pussy dripped more.

“You wanna know how big my cock is?” Jon whispered.

You gasped and moaned a little, feeling genuinely aroused by his aggressive “pickup.”

“Mmm-hmm,” you admitted in a giddy voice.

“You wondered what it might feel like sliding inside you?” Jon whispered against your ear, gently pulling your hair out of the way and licking around your earlobe. You felt genuinely weak. If you’d been a groupie, you’d have folded like a lawn chair at this point.

“Yes ... .all the time” you admitted, moaning more.

“You wanna taste it too?” Jon groaned into your ear.

“Mmmm, yes please,” you admitted in a slutty voice.

You turned to face him. You desperately wanted to give him a kiss. As you leaned in to kiss him, Jon slowly gripped your neck, pulling back slightly and stopping you. Your breath shook as he kept you in a playful, light choke hold.

“No offense babe, but I don’t kiss on the mouth,” Jon said in a sly, cold tone. “You did say you gave a few ‘favors’ to get back here,” Jon teased. Briefly, you were offended. But, again, you remembered you were playing a slutty groupie. You implied you gave head just to MEET him. So yes, he might let you fuck him… but a deep kiss on the mouth would be too much.

“Ok… fair enough,” you whispered as he gently gripped your throat.

“I’ll let you put your mouth anywhere else, though” Jon said with a wicked smile.

You slowly nodded your head in agreement, giving him very sultry, desperate eyes. You leaned forward and caressed his neck with kisses as he kept ahold of your neck, slightly tightening his grip on it. He pushed his hand more firmly against your crotch, rubbing up and down your slit through the flimsy fabric of your panties. He groaned deeply.

“How long have you wanted this?” Jon whispered in a guttural voice.

“Longer than you can imagine,” you whimpered back.

“Does that feel good?” Jon teased as he traced his middle finger against the entrance of your pussy through your panties, pressing harder.

“So fucking good,” you whined.

“You gonna let me in there?” Jon questioned.

“Yes Jon. PLEASE,” you begged. Jon groaned louder. He moved your panties to the side, dipping a single finger halfway into your pussy while staring down at your lap. His finger felt so good, just teasing the very opening. He knew doing this would leave you DESPERATE for more. Slowly removing his finger, he brought it to his mouth and tasted you.

“Fuck, you’re such a fuckin’ treat, girl,” Jon said, pushing you down against the couch. Your panties were saturated and you breathed hard, staring at him. Jon paused before giving you a dark stare and reaching a hand to lift your short skirt back up.

“Spread your legs for me more,” Jon asked, softly. You did as he said and let him look between your legs at the growing wet spot on your purple panties.

“So wet….just for me?” Jon asked.

“All for you,” you whispered, bringing one thigh up and draping it over his lap as he faced you more on the couch.

“You wanna sit on my lap, huh?” Jon grunted as he gripped you by the hips and pulled you closer to him.

“More than anything,” you replied.

“Mmmff… go for it,” Jon said, leaning back against the couch more. You quickly straddled his lap and sat back down, shaking with genuine nervousness. Jon really had you feeling like you were touching him for the first time. You were shocked at how slutty he had you acting. You felt his hard dick through his pants as he slowly rocked you in his arms, letting you dry hump up against him in slow, writhing movements.

“How’s that feel?” Jon inquired, as he gently pushed his crotch against your spread legs. He let you feel his rising dick pressing against your pussy through the clothing fabric.

“Feels really good… “ you said as you shook in his arms.

“You gonna let me make you feel even better?” Jon teased, rocking you gently in his lap.

“Absolutely,” you said. Jon grunted louder. “Ok babe…. But… not here… someone could walk in.” Without warning, Jon gripped you hard around the hips. He bucked hard against you before chucking you off of his lap and roughly plopping you back down on the couch next to him. You gasped in surprise. He was being a lot more rough with you than usual. But you liked it.

“What if we go in there? Are you down?” Jon asked, pointing to the dressing room bathroom.

“Mmmm… yeah,” you said, coyly. Jonathan gave you a smirk and grabbed you by the hand, pulling you firmly into the bathroom. Stumbling against him, he pushed you into the bathroom and slammed the door behind the two of you. You felt genuine adrenaline. Once inside, Jon pushed you hard against the wall and reached up under your skirt, gripping your pussy and rubbing his hand harder against it. You moaned against his chest as you let him pin you up against the cold bathroom wall.

Jon lifted your shirt up, leaving your tits out as he squeezed and carressed them more. He started sucking your nipples as he smushed you harder against the wall. You whimpered as you held his wet hair. His face was still drenched in sweat after the show and the heat and moisture from his face was getting all over your chest. You squealed with excitement and let him continue. He stopped for a moment, stepping back. He wanted to edge/tease you even more.

“Lift your skirt up for me, baby” he commanded in a sly voice. You did as he said, slowly/seductively raising your skirt. He eyed you like a hungry animal. “Take the panties down,” Jon whispered. “I wanna see that pretty little pussy,” he teased. Breathing quicker, you inched your fingers around the waistband of your panties before slowly sliding them down and letting them drop to the floor against your feet. You kept the front of your skirt raised up, letting him take in the view of your naked pussy. You leaned back against the wall, shirt still raised, so your breasts and pussy were exposed for him. His dick was very hard but he kept teasing you by just standing there, eyeing you hard, not touching you.

“You’re really gonna let me do it?” Jon teased, eyes boring into you.

“I’ll let you do anything,” you admitted in a hushed voice. Jon slowly stepped towards you, nodding his head. Before you knew what was happening, he firmly gripped both of your shoulders and spun you to face away from him. He pinned you back against the wall, pressing his crotch into your backside. You gasped more as you felt him pull your hair out of the way and start to bite your neck as he pulled your ass harder against his hard dick through his pants.

Dry humping against you again, you felt some pussy fluid literally start to drip down your inner thigh with anticipation. You were shocked at yourself for thoroughly ENJOYING this side of Jonathan. He pushed several fingers back against your pussy as he held you in place against the wall.

“I wanna feel how tight you are,” Jon groaned as he roughly slid two fingers into you front behind and started fucking you with them. You slumped your head against the wall, letting him push your pussy open. Your pussy walls quivered and clenched against his fingers as Jon began to moan with sexual frustration. His hand was getting very wet as you dripped onto his fingers and palm.

“Mmmfff.. Pretty fucking tight,” Jon groaned as he dipped his fingers around and let them slide further into you, rubbing hard. You whined louder.

“You think you can handle this cock?” Jon grunted as he pressed it harder against your backside. You felt the firm, warm outline of his big dick poking at your ass through his pants.

“Ahhh… uhgmmm.. I think so,” you whined.

Jon slid his fingers out of you and gripped you by the shoulders again, spinning you to face him.

The two of you breathed hard and stared at each other. He was sweating even more profusely now. Slowly, a wicked grin grew on Jon’s face. He knew he could make you work for it.

“I’ll tell you what, baby…. I’ll fuck you…. But only if you blow me a little first,” Jon said in his naughtiest voice. Again, you were a little offended. But you were also ridiculously aroused. He had you in the palm of his hand and you would do ANYTHING for him. You were literally desperate to get fucked by him. He had you wanting to go down on him. Wordlessly, you nodded. He leaned himself comfortably against the bathroom sink and waited to see what you’d do. You were nervous, staring at his pants. He made no effort to undo his belt buckle or zipper. He wanted to see what you’d do to him.

“You…. want me to just….????” you stammered, nervously taking steps towards him.

Jon wordlessly nodded, slumping his arms behind his back with a huge smile on his face.

Gingerly, you pressed yourself against him. He groaned as he watched you undo his belt buckle and zipper, exposing his boxers and revealing the outline of his raging hard-on. You decided to just go for it and be as slutty as possible. You pulled his cock out of his boxers and slumped to your knees, crouching in front of him. You quickly took his dick into your mouth and he let out a gasp as he grabbed the back of your hair and firmly gripped it. He pushed your head harder against his dick and let you keep sucking him hard and fast. He bucked against your face as you choked and sucked harder on him. You felt his cock twitch in your mouth and you tasted him on your tongue.

“Fuck baby, I can see why they let you back here,” Jon teased. “You’re good,” he groaned in a naughty, complimentary tone. As you kept sucking him, you did feel a little offended…. But… again… he was treating you how you BEGGED to be treated. You decided your best “revenge” was to get him off even more before leaving him hanging. You pressed his dick as far as you could against your throat and firmly gripped the base of it with your hand. He let out louder moans and threw his head back as you went on firmly sucking and gripping his dick. You kept at this for several minutes before wordlessly pulling your mouth away. His dick stood rigid and needy, begging for more. Slowly standing up and backing up against the wall, you smirked at him as he stared at you with hazy eyes.

“Was that good enough to get fucked now?” you teased, locking eyes with him.

Jon was lost for a moment, hazy expression on his face. He stumbled and balanced himself against the bathroom wall, grunting and breathing hard.

“Ughh… fuck….yeah…” Jon admitted…..”I think you deserve this cock now,” Jon teased back, smiling darkly.

He stepped towards you and grabbed you by the waist. Pushing you against the sink, he gripped you around the hips and raised you up onto it. It was a perfect height to fuck you against. He freed his cock from his boxers more, pressing his hard dick against your vaginal entrance as he held your legs open. You felt the cold sink tile against your ass as your pussy dripped even more, desperate to feel him push into you.

Instead of just giving it to you, he pressed the head of his dick against the entrance of your pussy, slowly pushing/rubbing the tip against it. You whined and gripped his hair, bucking your pussy against the head of his dick, inviting him inside you. You wrapped your legs around him and tried to pull him more into you. He was edging you HARD. He used his hand to rub the head of his dick against your clit and tease your slick pussy entrance with it. You knew what he was doing. He wanted you to beg for it. You whined more and braced yourself against him, wrapping your arms against his shoulders.

“Mmmm… Jon…. I need it,” you whined.

“Yeah?” Jon cooed.

“Yes!!” you begged.

Jon gently grabbed your hair and pulled the side of your head next to his mouth before speaking right into your ear.

“Say please,” Jon commanded, crushing your hair in his palm and holding you in place.

“PLEASE,” you whispered in a desperate, raspy voice.

He pushed hard into you as the two of you gasped. He didn’t fuck you like usual or start slow. From the very first pump, Jon pounded into you like an animal. All you could do was hyperventilate and keep a firm grasp on his shoulders for balance so you didn’t fall off the sink. He slammed you more against the mirror as he took rough pumps into you and pressed a hand up against the mirror behind you for balance. He let out animalistic, guttural noises as he took you.

Your pussy was drenched as he kept fucking you like this. His clothes were drenched in sweat by now and his sweat was getting all over you as crushed himself against your body. Your clit throbbed more from the shock and intensity of this experience. The way he was fucking you was somewhat unrecognizable. It was both selfish and insanely hot at the same time. You were shocked at yourself for loving it as you did. You let out loud squeals of pleasure and slight pain as he slammed his cock into you with reckless abandon.

“Gotta stay quiet baby,” Jon demanded as he reached a hand up and firmly pressed it to your mouth. His palm was drenched with sweat. He fucked you even harder as squealed louder into his palm.

Your pussy throbbed around his dick as you began to feel close to cumming. However, he was fucking you so hard, it also hurt a bit. You let out more of a scream sound into his palm and slightly shook your head, trying to let him know he was fucking you too hard.

Jon slowed for a second, letting out angry moans.

“Ughhhh.. Fu…… too much huh?” Jon teased.

You pulled at Jon’s hand, trying to get him to uncover your mouth and let you speak. He slid his wet hand off your mouth for a second. The two of you breathed hard, locking eyes as he left his cock inside you, waiting for an answer.

“Ahhh…. Mmm… yeah… a little too much,” you admitted through gasps.

“Mmmff…. I thought you could take it,” Jon said in a sly voice while slowly sliding his cock in and out of you and rocking you gently against the sink. You whined as Jon teased/edged you. You were very close to coming, but being fucked THIS hard made it more difficult to come.

“I just wanna come sooo bad,” you begged. “Just… be a little more gentle,” you pleaded.

Jon gave you a dark grin, slowly nodding his head. He kept rocking you and slowly sliding his dick in and out of your pussy.

“Ok girl…I guess you deserve it,” Jon whispered in a sultry voice. He slowed down just a little as he fucked you. He let you grip his shoulders as he took slightly slower, more seductive pumps into you. He licked his fingers and pressed a hand between your legs as he rubbed your clit. You whined against his shoulder as he rubbed your clit and took slower, rhythmic pumps into you.

He let you buck against him at your own pace as you got closer and closer to an orgasm. You started whining like crazy, desperate to cum. Unlike when he fucked you as his girlfriend, he was being cold/impatient because this roleplay experience was more about him getting off. He was far less interested in your satisfaction. You worked hard and fast, riding against his dick and building to your climax as he grew impatient and started fucking you harder again, grunting angrily.

Strangely, his coldness and hard fucking was still extremely arousing to you… witnessing this different side of him. As he felt your pussy walls quiver and your body begin to shake against him, he knew what to do to push you over the edge. He softly moaned and leaned his face against yours, nuzzling your ear and neck again… You were so close to coming you could barely stand it.

“Let go baby…..I wanna feel you cum all over my cock” Jon cooed in a seductive, soft/reassuring voice.

Your pussy had had enough. Shaking in his arms, your pussy clenched and quivered around his dick as you had a powerful orgasm. You couldn’t restrain yourself from screaming against his shoulder. Pushing his cock deep into you as you came, Jon grabbed the back of your head, pulling you hard into his shoulder. Screaming into his shoulder, his body slightly muffled your orgasm screams. He slowly writhed against your body, holding you in a tight embrace and letting your pussy clench around his dick. He was surprisingly comforting as you came in his arms. Lovingly holding you and letting you come hard, you kept moaning into his shoulder. He gently stroked your hair and soothingly rocked you in his arms as your pussy finished spasming around his engorged dick. As you gradually stopped coming, he let out a dark chuckle before whispering into your ear again.

“Mmmmff, you feel better baby?” Jon teased.

“Mmmm-hmm,” you whined weakly, stroking his soaked scalp and gripping his hair.

“Good….” Jon groaned. Jon leaned back slightly, exchanging hazy looks with you. Without giving you a chance to recover, Jon started taking quick, rough, pumps into you while. He groaned louder and his eyes grew black as he went back to rampantly fucking you. You gasped in shock over his sudden switch.

“Jon?!” you squealed in complaint as he gripped your hips hard. The look of indifference had returned to his face.

“I gave you what you wanted, baby…. Now it’s my turn,” Jon grunted while smirking and pushing harder into you.

“Fuck! ” you squealed as you braced yourself and got ready to let him take you more aggressively. Again, you were shocked at yourself for enjoying this…. But… Jonathan was an incredible fuck whether he was being gentle or rough.

Out of nowhere, he slid his raging hard cock out from between your legs. He pulled you off the bathroom counter by your thighs. You were confused for a moment and nearly fell. He gripped you hard in his arms so you didn’t tumble to the floor. Catching your balance against him, Jon squeezed you tightly in his arm while gritting his teeth and breathing incredibly hard. As you got your balance and stood, Jon firmly gripped your shoulders and faced you away from him. He wordlessly bent you over the sink. Gripping your hips, Jon pushed his cock back into your pussy from behind.

You yelped as he firmly gripped you around the waist with one hand and gripped your hip with the other. He used your hip to pull your lower body against his crotch in hard, fast, motions as he fucked deeper into you. Instinctively, you yelled “FUCK!!!” as he took you nice and hard. He was fucking you so rampantly, it felt like your legs were going to give out. It was clear he was REALLY enjoying himself as he pretended this was your one and only “moment” together. Jonathan began making much more noise as he let out loud growls, grunts, moans and whimpers.

He was 100% lost in the moment/fantasy. You gripped the sink basin as hard as you could so your legs didn’t give out. He was taking you with such intensity, you knew how sore you would be after. But again, you LOVED how insane he was getting. Your heart was racing and it felt like electric jolts were running through your whole body. You had never had THIS experience of Jonathan.

“FUCK, you’re gonna make me cum baby,” Jon groaned through his grit teeth.

“Ahh… gah… y- yeah, cum for me!!!” you yelped as you nearly fell, feeling him grip your waist even harder and slam into you over and over again…. Faster than you have ever felt him pump.

“AHHHHHHH SHIITTT!!!” Jon yelled as he pulled his dick out of you. You were confused. He always came inside you. Jon growled like an animal as he pulled out of you and aimed his dick at your bare backside, shooting his cum at your ass and lower back. Some cum shot onto your skirt as well. You felt the warm spurts hit your skin as he kept shooting. Dripping down your thighs and onto your stockings, he was literally covering you. You just slumped against the sink, breathing hard, feeling him collapse against your backside and finish coming against your body. It took you a moment to realize why he pulled out.

Obviously, if you were just a groupie, he wasn’t going to risk cumming inside you. It made sense. He’d definitely taken the fantasy “all the way.” You felt cum seeping down your ass as Jon’s grip on you gradually loosened. He sighed deeply and gradually slumped backwards. You couldn’t stand up anymore. He had fucked you WAY too hard. You slumped down to the floor. Falling to the cold tile, you felt Jonathan slump down to the ground behind you.

He was spent from a mix of fucking and performing earlier. He was absolutely drenched in sweat and had soaked/stained his clothing as well as yours. The two of you just breathed hard and grunted…. Sitting in the absolute mess you had made. But the experience had been well worth it for both of you. Your legs quaked and felt sore. Your ass was wet with his cum and you gently slid across the floor to face him.

Jonathan had his head lulled against the bathroom wall. He slowly put his cock away and did up his zip, shaking and tilting his head back. You cracked a smile, knowing you’d made him make his infamous head-back “climax” face for real. Figuring the fantasy roleplay was over, you gingerly crawled across the floor and slumped against his chest. He let out some soft moans while letting you hold him and rest against his chest. However, after some minutes of recovery, Jon cleared his throat and composed himself like nothing happened. He indifferently pulled away from you, standing up and grabbing a towel. He began wiping his face and acting like you weren’t even there. You were left sitting on the floor, wet, sweaty and exhausted.

Looking down at the ground at you, he cracked a grin and shook his head.

“C'mon babe, stand up,” Jon said as he offered you his hand and helped you to your feet.

Your legs still felt like jelly and you were very unsteady on your feet. You leaned against him for balance and tried to kiss him, but again, he pulled away. Instead he just let you hug him for a moment before letting go of you and locking eyes.

“You were really good baby,” Jon said in a naughty voice. The way he looked at you with a mix of sultriness and indifference made you realize the roleplay game wasn’t quite over. You went along with it and laughed.

“Um….. thank you…. You were amazing too,” you replied through labored breath. Jon’s gaze shifted from you over to the corner of the room where your panties were still sitting lyinf on the ground. Stepping away from you, Jon picked up your wet panties with a single finger and dangled them in front of you.

“Don’t forget these,” Jon said in a low, teasing voice. You let him hand your panties back to you. You shakily put them back on while he watched, smiling. Jon went to the sink and splashed some cold water on his face before mopping it down with the towel again. As you stood in the bathroom corner, leaning against the wall for balance…. Jonathan approached you again. He put an arm around you and guided you out of the bathroom, opening the door and leading you back to the main dressing room area.

You realized he was gently but firmly leading you to the door…. “seeing you out.” You felt your heart sink a little. It was at this point you were glad it was just a roleplay fantasy. Jon definitely had you feeling STUPID and QUITE slutty now. You were about to do the “walk of shame.” Jon sighed one more time, spinning you around to face him while pressing you gently against the door. He leaned in and gave you a final hug. As he let you out of the hug, he gazed at your face, giving you a few final seductive kisses on the cheeks and forehead. He pressed his face against your ear:

“I hope you got everything you wanted, hun…. It was really nice meeting you,” Jon whispered.

All you could do was nod as your legs continued to shake. You realized if you HAD been a groupie, all you would have done was make a fool of yourself if you tried to hang around from this moment forward. You let Jon open the dressing room door and usher you out, giving you one final grope on the ass as he gently pushed you out the door. Once outside, you heard the door slam behind you. You froze with shock as you stood alone in the hall. There was nothing but dead silence now…

You turned and stared back at Jon’s dressing room door….COMPLETELY taken aback in EVERY way. You continued to breathe hard…. Trying to catch your breath and stand up. Your legs still felt like jelly and your pussy was more than a little bit sore. After a moment, the dressing room door opened and Jon stood in the doorway with a silly/normal expression.

You stared at him in amazement, not sure what he’d do next at this point. Jon rubbed his forehead and shook his head, taking quick steps towards you and wrapping his arms around you in a big, reassuring hug. You embraced him back, realizing the “game” was over and he was your boyfriend again. You shook your head, holding him.

“Sorry baby.. I um… let that game FULL circle,” Jon admitted apologetically.

You pulled away from him, locking eyes before giving him a FIRM smack on the shoulder.

“FUCK Jon! You were a heartbreaker!!” you taunted. Jon slumped his head down, mopping sweat from his brow and nodding in embarrassed acknowledgment.

Quickly, you pushed your way back into the dressing room, shutting the door before anyone could see you in this SLUTTY, stained outfit you’d worn for him.

Back in the dressing room, Jonathan resumed apologetically holding you and guiding you over to the couch so you could “recover.” Your legs were definitely sore and you were happy to be sitting back down. Jon took off the waistcoat and stage clothes as he got dressed in a t-shirt and jeans. His stage outfit was soaked with sweat and fluids.

As you recovered, he handed you your dress and you changed in front of him. He stared hard at you, grinning and feeling pretty elated to have a lady who was willing to do these kinds of games with him. Stumbling a bit, Jon slumped on the couch, watching you with a big goofy grin as you pulled down your soaked panties and put your good ones back on. Leaning against him on the couch, the two of you held each other. After a long silence, Jon spoke:

“I… um… feel kind of bad for LIKING that so much… but, I’m glad you let me do that, baby,” Jon admitted. You let out some nervous laughter, looking up at his face and stroking his facial hair.

“Fuck…. I feel bad about myself for liking it too!!” you replied, giggling and shaking your head.

Jonathan pushed some hair out of your face, giving you a big, passionate kiss. It was definitely the only way he could think to apologize for “taking” you the way he did.

Slowly letting you out of the kiss, Jon spoke again:

“So…. we …both liked it?” he inquired, trying to gauge your reaction. Obviously he was hoping this roleplay could happen again sometime.

“Yeah…we both definitely liked it” you whispered back …..”except for .. ya know.. THE GETTING KICKED OUT PART!!!” you taunted before gently slapping his arm again.

Jon let out dark laughter while playing with his hair. There was silence between the two of you. You knew it was about time to get out of this dressing room and head back to the hotel. Jon helped you put your coat on and he put a light hoodie on as he packed up his stuff and wiped down his wet face/hair one more time. Placing a hand around your waist, Jon gently led you out of the dressing room. As you unsteadily walked down the hall, using him for balance, he whispered in your ear one more time.

“So…. are you gonna be my ‘Emilia’ again sometime?” Jon inquired in a dirty voice.

“Mmmmm…. Definitely,” you replied.

---

Side note:

I have a TikTok & Youtube where I make sexy/funny JD thirst traps/naughty joke Korn-related comedy edits if y'all are interested. I include myself in several vids, I'm an openly pervy/dorky lady haha. My accounts are not for clout/promotion. I'm just way into him (if you couldn't tell). If you stumbled THIS far into sexy JD stuff you might enjoy my vids.

Link to an example of a funny/dirty JD+ Commentary Stitch Vid I did recently lol:

Link to my Tiktok:

Link to my Youtube:

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