#he needs a hug honestly

[mintypsii]

his first reaction to losing all his friends in one go and facing the crushing weight of lonliness is to get high on mushrooms i am In Pain

[foreverascout]

what does your heart look like?

Broken, missing pieces that once were there

Your heart has been torn before, chipped and maybe even shattered. Some pieces will never be recovered, and you are shaped by the loss. But it can still be shaped into something tangible, something good, even with its flaws and imperfections. You don’t have to do all the work of rebuilding by yourself. Allow other hands to leave their fingerprints on the new heart you create from the remnants.

Tagged by: @arrowablaze many moons ago

Tagging: You!

[hinamie]

I'm always pushing you away from me / but you come back with gravity / and when I call, you come home

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.

[taichea]

i will wait for you [spoilers for p5 royal …..]

…. hahaha … a little bit late to the absolutely regular day that is 2/2 … hahah… anyway fav frames

[corpusdiem-seizethedead]

Husk: This is my boyfriend Angel, he's so smart and handsome and I'm so proud of him

Vaggie: This is my beautiful girlfriend Charlie, she's my angel and I love her so much

Alastor: this is Niffty she has rabies

[emo-batboy]

A Wild Battinson (Social Media AU)

Part 11 (Masterlist)

(Part 12)

@bruciemilf This one’s just really chaotic

[httpiastri]

bailando, bailando 💃💃

[saltedpineappleart]

posting art in this blog becuzzzz...

[damonalbarn]

Damon listening to The Ballad of Darren for the first time.

[brigid-faye]

small scene that's been bouncing around my head for idk a decade. not an excerpt from anything

Remus is standing in the shadows of the owlery, his chest jumping in too-quick breaths behind his folded arms, his barely-17-year-old face scowling and Sirius knows - he knows - the other boy is about two seconds from bursting into tears. Sirius doesn't understand why James and Peter don't seem to see that.

Unfortunately the two of them are currently between him and Remus, because those two are the sorts of friends you turn to when you're upset. You go to Peter for sympathy. You go to James to be buoyed up. Sirius knows who he is. His brand of fury will just make it worse.

"You sent it already?" James is asking, confused and disappointed.

"Why not?" Remus snaps.

They're talking about a note Remus just let fly, one in response to a nasty letter he received less than an hour ago over breakfast. The letter was rescinding an offer of a summer job at the national museum Remus got a week earlier. The letter didn't say they were pulling the offer because they learned Remus was a werewolf but Remus assumed that. Sirius did, too, because the world is shitty sometimes. (A concept Sirius is starting to understand that James and Peter don't quite grasp.)

James looks bewildered. Peter makes a 'slow down' motion and says, "Well-but-what did you say?"

Remus shrugs. "Thanks for the opportunity," he says flatly. "What was I supposed to say?"

"That they're being assholes!" James says. "Or-or, I don't know, I could write my mum, she could-"

Remus makes a hopeless sound, a shaky laugh, bitter and lost enough that Sirius involuntarily takes a step closer.

Remus looks at him.

Remus turns those hazel eyes to Sirius, his expression angry and hurt and pleading, and fuck-fuck-fuck this year has been a delicate, delicious, terrifying mess between the two of them and Sirius is so gone for him, and has no idea where they're going, or what he's supposed to do, but Remus is begging him to get this - this right here - right, so Sirius stops thinking.

He steps between James and Peter and yanks Remus into his arms.

Remus is startled; Sirius notices the way he stiffens and pulls back a little, like Sirius might think better of this. But when Sirius doesn't, when Sirius just holds tighter and says "Fuck 'em" in his ear, Remus collapses against his shoulder, letting go of his tears and hiding his face in Sirius' neck.

James and Peter are right there and silent and there's no way this looks like an embrace between friends, but Sirius doesn't care. Because maybe Peter is more comforting and James inspires hope, but Sirius is the one Remus wants right now, and that is everything Sirius needs.

[sebfreak]

Edgar Redmond

[mandalhoerian]

leon kennedy + love languages analysis

It’s in Leon’s job description to help and serve, he’s always out there chasing bioweapons and their makers to save others or doing the bidding of his higher-ups — it’s all in the name of the right thing and out of his strong sense of justice. It doesn’t matter if he’s in an overbearing mission breathing down his neck in utmost priority, he will stop and try his best to help out a random citizen as you can see in RE6. He does also state in RE2 remake that helping people in need was why he chose his occupation, be it in his emo era too, Leon just can’t look away from innocent bystanders. Accepting to look for Claire’s brother when he just met her that night, and also the inability to leave Ada alone in the maze of the sewer he has no idea how to solve the puzzle to, and agreeing to whatever Helena wanted to show him when he was so suspicious of her because she was distraught and clearly in need of something are just some examples of this. 

He helps however he can, whenever he can; he also expresses great concern for the wellbeing of others before his own as it’s his main drive in life. Leon’s a man of duty and selfless in nature, the only time he’s done anything for himself was when he wanted to chase the trail of bioweapons in Eastern Slav Republic instead of pulling back like he was ordered to, and even that was work.   

Therefore we can say acts of service is his primary love language, so much so you would want him to take a break from it. 

Leon really doesn’t look after himself. 

His go-to self-destruction method is to indulge in alcohol to deal with his problems and drink away his feelings instead of seeking help. Maybe he doesn’t believe in getting help in his field of work (nobody has gone through what he has, and seen what he’s seen, and maybe he doesn’t want to bother people with any of it), but he does shut himself off and ignores his problems — doesn’t ask for help, at all. 

In Damnation, he pushes Hunnigan away when she tries to explain the situation to him and nonchalantly dissolves the conversation when she’s afraid he’s going to take off. In Vendetta, he’d rather fight Chris and put on a sarcastic demeanor than to express vulnerability when he clearly needs someone to be his confidant. He doesn’t want to share his burden, but will relentlessly pressure you to share yours.  

With his significant other, he would want to take on the weight of whatever’s on you regardless — from mundane things around the house like cleaning, fixing things, preparing breakfast so you can sleep a little bit more and being a great giver in bed to grander gestures like taking a bullet for you and becoming mean to you in order to keep you away from harm’s way (like he did with Claire at the end of Infinite Darkness, he lost his friendship with her but it kept her safe). Leon will go above and beyond to make life better and easier for you, but he is obsessed with your safety first and foremost. 

However, you will have problems with getting him to open up like I mentioned previously, he deals with his problems on his own and he won’t want to trouble you with whatever he’s going through at the moment — with the plus of his job being mostly confidential, it’s a struggle to help him when the most of his suffering comes from the loss and trauma that comes with it. 

It makes him emotional that you help in other areas though, when you clean up his place at times he is away for a long time, when you make a homemade meal cooked just for him, or when you offer to give him shoulder massages seeing as he’s extremely tired. He isn’t used to being taken care of, and part of him feels guilty, but he’s so appreciative and happy someone cares for him this much. 

Leon moves around quite often and is rarely at his place of residence, so he doesn’t spend a lot of time at home. Therefore, even when his place screams how fat his salary is from the outside, his house is not a home, it doesn’t have a lot in it and is basically empty like a ghost is living in it. And again, with being an agent comes the practicality of not having a lot on you so you can be more flexible, but it’s almost as if it reflects how little he thinks of his life and has nothing to leave behind if he dies on duty.  

He even has two default outfits, first is anything he can throw on himself (preferably jeans) with a leather jacket and the second is the agent outfit, which is just a suit (button-up shirts grew on him over the years.) He isn’t someone who treats himself aside from alcohol and he doesn’t care much for luxuries — the only materialistic things that could excite him were a bike and a bazooka, and both were found by him randomly and were tools to help him in action. 

What he chooses to own, though, are high in quality. His RE4 outfit has Schott’s Classic B-3 Sheepskin Leather Bomber Jacket is $1495 USD. He also drove to Racoon City in a Jeep that he had to abandon. Being rich makes you this carefree, huh? 

He has a lot more than he can spend, therefore I believe he would happily spend it on his significant other. Leon would be the type of guy who buys something out of nowhere because it reminded him of you, or that he saw you looking at it, maybe it was a chocolate bar, or maybe some random scented candle you thought looked sick. He loves seeing you surprised and delighted, and thinking of your space having the traces of him makes him happy — makes him feel the bond is more concrete and tangible. He’s a giver, so it’s only natural he gives presents too. 

Now, receiving gifts from you is another level of joy for him. Leon wouldn’t have thought he cared much about things like that but the thought. The idea of you thinking this much of him and putting your heart into it, there’s something intimate in it that has him feeling so important. Owning things you gave him has a special place in his heart, and he will take great care of them. Maybe he still has the wrapper of some ribbon from a package in his drawer, who’s to say? It’s the carnal desire to hold onto the proof of your existence, perhaps. 

Leon has absolutely no time at all for himself, and in his days off, they keep pulling him back for some unexpected emergency. His schedule is unpredictable. In RE4, he does say “Story of my life,” when Hunnigan reminds him that he’s on duty right now after he flirts with her. Then later, he reminds her that it was them who pulled him out of furlough for this when she tells him to fall back on his Eastern Slav Republic mission. Leon rarely gets any break from bioweapon fighting and over the years, the exhaustion has taken a toll on him, the only constant is chaos in his life, he scarcely can spare any mundane moments to his acquaintances as he barely has any time for himself. 

Quality time though, as he lacks so much of it, is something he yearns for deep down. I mean, hello, the way he wanted that dinner with Claire in Infinite Darkness? He really really wanted her company, and to catch up with her. He asked Shenmei as well. It's a crime that nobody accepted his requests, someone go get dinner with him right now.

It’s because he can’t spend time with people that he wants it so badly in the first place. That’s where he is also self-destructive and it’s a double-edged sword. He seeks company of flirtations because he’s lonely, yet he won’t pursue anything serious. He’s scared of committing to someone since it won’t work due to complications and the distance, it’ll get messy. 

He even deprives himself of friendships and is unwilling to let anyone get too close. Leon is an isolationist, yet he needs people in his life to process his trauma and grief and bully him about his drinking habits but keeps denying himself the company. 

And then there’s the fear of losing that person. He doesn’t spend any time getting close to people, he treasures the companions he has, but everybody is at an arm’s length. He already reacts so negatively to the deaths of allies he barely got to know briefly — Ada messed him up real good, too. How do you think he feels imagining what he could have had with her? He wants stability and settling, but Ada is anything but that. He chases every interaction to be longer, seeks her company just for their meeting to be stretched even by minutes. Leon gets attached so easily, and he deprives himself of time with them out of being scared by it. One part of him must be comfortable in his love for her because it’ll never become a reality, because she’ll never take him up to it, he’d rather take the suffering than the happiness. 

But quality time also is so important to him because it’s in these times of ordinary domesticity that he can find normalness outside the crazy undead shit he has to deal with. It helps him recharge and he craves having this to come back to. 

He would feel so guilty about not being able to be with his significant other, he could even forget important days and miss important moments of your life and he wouldn’t even know most of the time because he’s just so occupied and in survival mode for a while after he comes back. You would have to be understanding of his situation and forgiving, too, it’s not up to him whatever he gets called in for, and because you wouldn’t know what it was, it’s a great deal of practicing patience, and that’s why it’s hard being in a relationship with Leon. Hell, it’s the base reason why couples break up; the guy is inattentive and negligent and the girl breaks it off in the end. In this scenario, zombies are involved. 

You can only get the peaceful moments inbetween with him. And it has to be enough, and believe that he hates going away as much as you do and more.    

Leon hates being praised. He dislikes being heralded as some legend for getting out of Racoon City alive and his experiences ultimately leading him to rescuing the president’s daughter only to be elevated in praise more. 

He was just at the wrong place at the right time. He got lucky, ended up trailing behind Ada who was competent at what she did and reached the root of the problem just because he happened to run into her — it wasn’t him, it was just stars aligning. Pure coincidence. 

Leon sometimes thinks he didn’t deserve making it out, but he did anyway, and now this life of his belongs to a purpose, the purpose. 

He’s just doing his job. One shouldn’t be applauded for doing their job. 

Compliments make him uncomfortable and it’s the easiest way to make him clamp up on a conversation, he’ll vehemently deny whatever it is and change the subject. It looks like Leon’s being humble (he is), but there’s a deeper reason with an underlying imposter syndrome going on in the back of his mind. He just doesn’t feel worthy some days. 

Affirmations on the other hand also don’t come easy, he’s in one of the most coldly professional fields and it’s strictly business, and he is emotionally constipated and deeply traumatized, therefore there’s a lot he doesn’t say and he doesn’t know how to say, and he is bad at telling you what he wants. He’s good at sass and banter, but ask him to tell you about his nightmares and he’ll just hug you and go back to sleep. 

Leon isn’t used to expressing affection through words either, and prefers to show it instead. You’ll know he loves you even if he doesn’t say it outright. But with his significant other, though, he’ll do his best to learn to be more affectionate with words to you to show his appreciation — just prepare for shy and awkward Leon. The soft side of him comes out this way, he’ll hesitantly ask you to stay and he’ll look so young doing it that it’ll melt your heart.   

Leon is one touch-starved poor bastard. 

Here’s the reason why: he’s a pretty lonely guy but he’d rather indulge in the warmth of a person than letting them in. Solitude is a personal preference of his, and it leads him to seeking out temporary companionship to feed this part of his. Meaningless one-night stands are a go-to of his, as they mean no deeper connection but all the skin to skin contact and the soothing heat beside him. If he’s lucky, his partner would pet his head during the deed, or caress his face, now those are the treat. 

If he could just let go and the perfect opportunity arose, he would just lie in the arms of his significant other for hours being hugged by them, enveloped in the coziness, head empty and fuzzy. Those would be the perfect naps he needed, because wow does this guy not sleep well.    

It would be a first for him to get affectionate touches coming with a friendship as well, it’s been a lifetime since he let himself be that way with someone, it’s not easy to get him to be chummy and lighthearted with you in that aspect. He’s a well-mannered guy too, so he’s the type to keep a respectable distance even when he’s being playful. Half-hugs, back pats and handshakes are the best you’re going to get as his friend, and they don’t happen often.   

The clinginess blooms well into the relationship after Leon gets comfortable with exploring that childish, neglected part of his. He would adore hugs, hand-holding, reaching out to grab you casually while sitting next to you in the confines of your private space, you would feel his love through him seeking you out for comfort voluntarily and lowering his serious exterior to be relaxed around you. His utmost weakness is you playing with his hair and tracing his face with your fingers, because he goes out like a light almost immediately.  

Leon also won't be rough with you physically while bonking so don't expect playfighting and do not hit him while joking around, he gets thrown around and hurt so much as it is (the amount of being strangled by tyrants and plagas? no, he's not into choking), and he tends to be extremely tender and sweet. Though you might discover a pretty interesting side of him if you decide to be assertive and take care of him in bed, you might just get addicted to how shy he could get.

[header template credits]

[peku-g]

"Shut up! Leave me alone! This... this is just too much... Why do I have to be a part of this...? I mean, I'm different from the rest of you... And I don't even have a talent... (...) Ha... hahaha, I don't understand it at all"

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Don't Wormy About Me.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[auteurdefeu]

So I feel like it’s almost collectively agreed upon that Fabian is not straight. I’ve seen a lot of people talk about him probably not being cis either, I’m personally on board with he/they Fabian.

Now allow me to present my headcanon:

Fabian being on the asexual spectrum. Not as sex-repulsed as Riz, probably more neutral to it, but still. I’ve brought this up before but this time I’m doing it outside of the context of specific ships.

I can’t find the specific instance so someone please tell me if this didn’t actually happen, but. I could’ve sworn there was a time someone (probably Kristen) was talking about having sex, a comment was made about how Fabian could learn from that, and he insisted that he already knew how to kiss. Which, buddy… completely different thing. But it is always “getting his kisses in”, when it’s shown that the Bad Kids/Intrepid Heroes don’t usually censor themselves when it comes to that.

He’s been very awkward when it comes to any actual advances, as seen especially with Mazey this year. To be fair, that is a pretty normal thing for teenagers but for someone with his confidence, he seems skittish when it comes to proper relationships. In my experience as someone aroace-spec, I love romance and take no problem with the idea of sex in the abstract, but as soon as any of it feels personal or directed toward me, it leads to a similar kind of panic/discomfort, unsure how to engage.

My personal take on it, overall, was Fabian trying to live up to his father’s legacy. Bill got around, and Fabian spoke proudly of it in Freshman Year (only to later have to deal with the fact he apparently had a lot of half siblings that have since been eaten by Captain James… oops). Given everything else in his arc, it would make sense that he sees it as an expectation to follow in Bill’s footsteps, because that’s how to seem ‘cool’ and ‘fit in’. It seems more like something he has to do than something he actively wants.

I know he and Aelwyn apparently canonically had sex. if Siobhan hadn’t leaned into it and acted like Adaine was an unfortunate witness, I’d say it wasn’t above Fabian to beg Aelwyn to lie for him to make him seem cooler. But I digress. It’s all headcanons anyway, and asexual people can still have and enjoy sex. Just senseless rambling over here 🫡