#i feel bad for the victims that they were mocked in this way but also i think all she’s done with this apology video is make it pretty damn

[fingertipsmp3]

Like I hate to be one of Those People and I would never say “I told you so” but I was always creeped out by Miranda Sings tbh. I remember I watched like a minute of one of her videos back in the day and was like “how does anyone like this?”

[stitched-mouth-vs-the-world]

Edge You To Death

Pairing: Undertaker x AFAB! Reader or Undertaker x Fem! Reader.

Summary: Undertaker loves ruining your orgasms.

Warnings: NSFW, Smut, Casual sex, Undertaker and Reader have a weird ‘situationship’, Age gap relationship, Mention of pedophila (not in reference to Undertaker! UT is not a pedo!), Reader is unaware Undertaker is a reaper or of what he does for Ciel, Reader has MY personal thoughts on pedophila (I don’t think they are controversial but just in case you don’t wanna here it skip the introduction), Oral sex (fem receiving), Edging, Daddy kink.

Writing Time: 1 hour.

Word Count: 1,317.

Format: Kinktober Fic, Day 20.

A/N:

I kinda forgot wtf I was doing here.

Most of my Kinktober works were written well in advance, but this wasn’t one of them. I wrote this 2 days before it was due. My requests are pilling up but I should start prioritising these now. I doubt I’ve gotten that Matthew Patel request done yet, I planned to do that when I got the requester’s first message about it, sent the same day I got the request, but not anymore. Sounds a lot like a request got ages ago on my previous account but deleted when I started feeling harassed by the requester. This is more for the Matthew Patel requester than anyone else but yeah… don’t harass people about requests especially if it hasn’t been that long since you sent it. Everyone, harass me over a request and I’ll just delete it. You can send one reminder after a week and that’s it. Anymore and I delete. I usually have requests done in a week or two and those kinds of messages just destroy my motivation.

Anyway! Please enjoy this Undertaker smut.

Here are my other Kinktober 2023 works.

—-///—-

You had been feeling dam good since you started sleeping with the Undertaker.

You had new relationship jitters, even if it wasn’t really a relationship. He was what you had fantasied about for years. An older gentleman who was kind and treated you like a Queen, but also open about wanting to ravishing you. With his age also came along a lot of life and sexual experience, a lot more than you had. He never mocked you for knowing less than him, he was just happy you wanted to know and happily taught you a lot.

Whilst age gap relationships have always been common and considered normal prior to the Victorian era, it was slowly becoming distasteful. Something many were unhappy with but also many other who were happy. Undertaker, years ago, would have been in favour this but with you now… he was in the middle and uncomfortable with it. Surely you and his relationship was ok because you was definitely an adult.

You were pretty set in stone on the matter. To you, age gap relationships were bad, unless it was you. You were a young woman who would never say no to an older man, even when you was a girl. You knew your exes were absolutely pedos, but you didn’t care as long as it was just you they were after. And no you didn’t consider yourself a victim.

You didn’t think of Undertaker in the same way though. You was an adult when you met him therefore wasn’t bad for perusing you. Well, you perused him but it didn’t matter.

Right know you was doing some dusting in the front of Undertaker’s shop, he was in the back. The first thing you took notice of when you first met your lover… was how nasty his shop is. It’s always covered in dirt and stinked of death. Obviously it would smell of death, it’s a funeral home, but the dirt was unnecessary and you was surprised that Undertaker had tried to do something about the smell. You figured he’s probably gotten used to it now and gone nose blind.

Once you had cleaned to a satisfying amount, you heard the bell go. You looked up and saw the familiar Earl Phantomhive and his butler. The young boy always looked so dam miserable, it depressed you. You didn’t like interacting with either of them and they never seemed to want your help, so you called your bedmate.

Undertaker came into the room, happy to deal with the Phantomhive and his butler. You was aware the two engaged in a different kind of business than coffins or funeral services, but it was none of your business what their business was. So you wasn’t going to ask…

Instead you headed out of the room and upstairs to bed, it was late and you knew Undertaker would join you after he was done with his ‘business’.

—-///—-

“Sort out the Earl?” You asked.

“Yes, Dear.” Undertaker smiled as he climbed into his bed, next you.

You sat up immediately and glared at him, “How many times have I told you Undie?! No sleeping in your day clothes!”

He laughed as you pushed him out of his own bed. Yeah, Undertaker had a bad habit of sleeping in his day clothes. He didn’t own PJs until you came into his life, nearly a year ago now.

“Ok! Ok!” Undertaker walked over to his drawers to fish out his sleepwear.

Once he did, he placed them on the end of the bed and looked down at you. You gave him a small smile, suddenly remembering this was his home and his bed and who are you say anything about how he sleeps? After all, you’re not even dating.

Undertaker grinned widely at you and slowly started removing his cloak. Ah, he was trying to indicate something.

He slowly stripped completely in front of you before getting back on the bed and crawling onto you. You kissed his lip gently and took hold of his arms, but Undertaker shook your hold off his arms and grabbed your face to pull you even closer to him, deeping your kiss. He quickly slipped his tongue into your mouth, desperate for a makeout session.

You moaned in between the kisses, you were started to feel a growing sensation in between your legs. If not dealt with quickly, it would become uncomfortable. Luckily for you, Undertaker could sense your arousal and was more than willing to help.

He let go of your lips and before you could even whine or complain, he was pulling the duvet and sleep shorts down and licking your lower regions. You made your hands comfortable, pulling on the pillow under your head and proped up your legs and planted your feet into the bed.

Undertaker ate you out like a mad mad. Sucking, licking, spitting and groaning like crazy. Your pussy and it’s sweet smell made him act unusual, way less calm and in control than usual. This was something you was proud of. You had the power (or pussy) to make Undertaker lose all composure.

You started to feel less prideful about your achievement as you started to feel yourself losing to Undertaker’s tongue. Your whimpered had become cries and moans, you begged him for release but you should of known better. It would be a long while before you got that.

Undertaker grinned evily against your cunt then looked up you, just go get a glimpse of your flustered expression. Having wait himself for release was a sacrifice he was willing to make if he got to see you cry and beg him for climax. He absolutely got a weird power trip from it.

“Oh please… oh please Daddy, I need to cum now!”

“Nu uh uh! You don’t get to cum until I say so, Dearie!”

You were still staring up at the ceiling and unable to look down, but you didn’t need to look down to know Undertaker was wearing his usual evil wicked grin. He always had that look when he was planning to edge you to death.

[explodingchantry]

Anders isn't my problematic fave because he isn't problematic. I think the wider concept of anders being 'wrong' the fandom has is a clear example of how biased the writing has been in the games. It's the same reason why people hate Jowan, or why they think the kinloch hold mages were stupid. There's a clear bias in the writing and framing of it all that guides the player towards feeling negatively.

The majority of answers you can give Jowan in Dao are negative, mocking, or downright insulting. The ones who aren't are just... Neutral. You can be a bit sympathetic to him in the circle origin but by the time you meed him in redcliff most of your dialogue choices are so fucking mean. In my replay I was trying desperately to be nice and sympathetic to him but the best you can do is be neutral and let him go but for every rude dialogue option there is no "you've been through something horrible, I'm sorry" or "you were manipulated, loghain took advantage of your vulnerability, I'm sorry" it's soooooo.

Likewise, I always make sure to speak to every single npc in the mage origins and the One mention of uldred before the broken circle quest is from the one mage who tells you about the different political faction enchanters are in, and it's with absolute disdain. That mage thinks uldred is annoying and it's implied that the other enchanters think so, too. Uldred who was an activist for mage liberation is treated as annoying for being an activist.

Then he turns out to be a blood mage and to have killed the majority of the circle, turning them into abominations. The message is clear: those who seek liberation are wicked. In the first game of the series, thus in the game which introduced the concept of circles at all, their existence is justified by the text. It overtly says: look at all those foolish mages, how dangerous they can be when One of them is wicked. Can you imagine if they were free? Can you imagine those abominations' destruction if they were out in the open?

Something similar happens in the mage origin, with Jowan. Through the whole origin, whilst Jowan is painted as annoying, he's definitely seen as a victim. Up until he uses blood magic, that is. Suddenly, the player is likely supposed to think "oh, so they were right to want to make him tranquil after all". Instead of being a way to show that the circle will often turn innocent mages tranquil, it shows you that greagoir was right to distrust Jowan, because he was indeed a blood mage. Instead of showing you how paranoid those in power are about mages, the writing justifies their fear and hatred.

Bear in mind this is the first game and likely the very first thing that happens to a lot of new players. The game does not expect you to know the intricacies of its lore yet, doesn't expect you to understand that blood magic is actually fucking neutral unless you sacrifice people for it. You might be tempted to argue that it's setting up for that realisation later and for you to feel bad about Jowan later, realizing he was led to blood magic because it was his only solution, because he and all other mages are caged like dogs (except this is ferelden, so the dogs are better treated than them). But then you've got the redcliff fiasco where it's obvious the writers expect you to fucking hate his guts

And while dragon age 2 is more overt in its depiction of mage suffering, it also tries to pass on the idea that kirkwall is a special case, that it's only the gallows that are this bad. That it's just Meredith whose craaazeyyy 🤪 and not just Meredith being a product of a corrupt system. The writers expect you to think of Anders as an unstable extremist, or as his writer puts it, a "bipolar terrorist" (note that ofc there's nothing fucking wrong with being bipolar, but I don't think his writer cares!)

With different writers and the exact same set of events, Anders blowing up the chantry would be easily recognized as a positive, as an act of justice, of rightful rebellion. Instead it's seen as a tragedy, a mistake. Instead Anders is categorized as a villain, morally grey even though Hawke themselves has a higher death toll than he ever will.

It's a lesson, I think. In narrative bias.

[iridescentttears]

my thoughts on the deal with the toxic ex thing we’ve got going on from a late night noncoherent ramble hot take:

the whole billford shipping is so fascinatingly heinous and foul and complex and infuriating and interesting that i certainly can’t look away and i’m intrigued by seeing more of the billford sexy kinky shipping, like that’s not the right word for it but u get it. and i won’t be mad when i see it again but i will slightly shake my head disapprovingly because i know that no iteration of billford is in any ways healthy.

and as someone who’s been through DV and emotional abuse situations it’s kinda odd to me that ppl are making serious and silly takes on, oh no they’re fucking n sucking, they’re kinky af. (and i know that’s an oversimplification on that regard as well but just like for the point of this i think you get what i mean— like it’s in my hc that they hooked up after karaoke and maybe for a while after that it was like a partnersitustionship and in the year of our good lord and savior casual by chappell roan it’s a perfect addition to the lore timing wise)

but also it’s like, no they’re in an unfair power dynamic. sure they each come to it with unique sets of trauma and experience. but one participant is way older way “smarter” way more manipulative and to me there’s no way for that to be sexy. it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

i also, from experience was filled with an overwhelming sense of peace and relief at the end of the book of bill when ford lets his family into his world, into his inner trauma, and they embrace him. they tell him that he’s not stupid or weak for being a victim of abuse they tell him that bill is a fucking loser! and he is. and the ppl who hurt me were fucking losers and so is every person who hurts people!! and having that moment when he was surrounded by their love, and he no longer felt shame and guilt from what happened in his past— that moment right there is what made the book something i will cherish. that’s a moment in the book where i out loud had a moment where i was like yes, this right here is the heart of what this is all about what gravity falls is at its core level.

like journal 1 taught me that i could embrace being weird and in the end i’ll turn out all right. the book of bill missing journal pages taught me that even tho ive had some shit happen to me and it’s changed who i am and how i see the world, i am more than a victim and if i allow myself to trust the ppl i love and let in the light, my past will not consume me and does not have to continue to be a part of my story. i can dance around in the woods with my niece and mock a triangle statue while wearing witch hats. i can grieve and move on and a lot of that is my internal work with myself like ford with himself, but its not done all alone, when you have love around you in your friends, in your chosen family whether they be by birth or not, that’s how you really learn to let it all go.

so in a way it’s really fucked up, the ship that is, but again i’m not mad at anyone who ships it. i’m sure you all have very different perspectives and thought and reasons that are totally valid, this is just how i feel from my perspective! i will continue to enjoy all the billford edits and fanart that comes across my page. i especially love anything to do with the breakup/divorce/ fiddleford, bill, ford love triangle angle. i love that shit

this is favorite thing on the internet rn:

@ raycipher2 on tiktok i think is the creator of this delightful viral sensation!

so i took a detour rant there, oops word vomit am i right?

if u read all this pls tell me if this makes any sense lmao

[sapphic-agent]

Let's Talk About Bakugou's Apology

Jfc, I swear this wasn't meant to be an MHA blog but whatever. Let's get into this.

I wanted to give Bakugou stans the benefit of the doubt. I wanted to think that they would only hype something up if it was groundbreaking. I wanted to believe that Horikoshi was a halfway decent writer and would put actual effort into such a pivotal, revered moment in the series.

I was left sorely disappointed for multiple reasons.

1) A List of Excuses To be completely fair to Bakugou, he does take some accountability which was more than I expected. He does acknowledge that what he did was wrong a few times during his little speech. I have to give him credit for that. However, it's overshadowed by the narrative making sure to stress that it was the people around Bakugou who were at fault for that behavior. Which isn't true because even before he got his quirk, he still treated Izuku like garbage. He gave him the name Deku and acted like he was above everyone way before Izuku was deemed quirkless.

(I'd also like to add that the only thing that literal pre-school teacher said was that Bakugou's quirk could make for a fine hero. He was the one who ran with it and decided that it made him better than everyone and that he would be the best)

There's also the fact that every time he does point out what he did was wrong, there's always some kind of justification behind it. "I did... because I felt..." It undermines what's supposed to be a genuine apology because it's not about Bakugou's feelings, he wasn't the one hurt (more on this later).

2) Timing

So many people have brought this up and they're absolutely right; that was the worst possible time for this to happen. Izuku was injured, starving, and dirty. Not to mention his mental state is practically in shambles. He's been isolating himself for weeks in his attempts to walk a selfless, lonely path. The absolute last thing he needed was this shitty apology.

This was supposed to be an effort for Class 1A to show Izuku that they care about him and to convince him to share his burden and come back to UA with them and rest and heal. Instead that genuine effort is highjacked by Bakugou rambling on about something entirely unrelated. He could have done this during the bath scene or even right after that. Instead, it's shoehorned into Izuku's actual friends trying their best to help him.

Iida's words should have been the final ones. They had enough impact and were way more powerful. There was no reason for Bakugou's apology to be the finishing lines.

3) The Insults

It's wild to me that Bakugou apologized for insulting Izuku... right after purposely insulting Izuku.

This is something that has been detrimental to Bakugou's entire character "redemption". "Oh, he's changing!" Except he's still doing the same shit he's always done. It undermines the entire point of redeeming him.

(I hate to be pro Endeavor in any way, but at least when he decided to change he made the genuine effort to stay that way and didn't relapse into old habits)

Not only did him mocking Izuku do absolutely nothing to change his mind, it's just so shitty to do to someone who's clearly struggling. If you are incapable of showing empathy and kindness at a time like this, shut up and sit down because there's no reason for you to open your mouth. You're not helping, you're only making things worse.

And then he says, "I don't expect this to change things between us." Like bro, that's completely on you. All you have to do is not be a dick and act like your apology actually meant something by refraining from hurling insults at someone who did nothing to deserve it. But even after this apology, he continues to yell at and insult Izuku. Sato and Tokoyami even call him out on this, only it's just played for laughs.

Word to the wise kids, an apology means nothing if just keep repeating your bad behavior.

4) No Autonomy for the Victim

Not once do we get to see what Izuku's thinking. Not once do we ever see things from his point of view.

This moment is entirely about Bakugou. It's only a plot device to develop his character and make him come off better. And Izuku who was the victim gets no attention. He doesn't even get to respond, he just faints by the end of it.

In fact, the closest thing we ever get to an insight into Izuku's feelings is All Might saying that he wouldn't hold what Bakugou did against him. That's such a copout considering a) nothing Izuku did ever indicated he felt that way and b) another person is speaking for him. He doesn't even get to say this himself.

Horikoshi does this consistently. Izuku is never allowed to voice how he feels. We never get to see how things are affecting him. The only time he's ever permitted to show strong emotions is when it's in favor of someone else. You would think that by this point in the story that would be rectified. But no, everything has to be about Bakugou. Not even in his own rescue story can Izuku ever be the center of attention. No, it's all about making Bakugou better.

(Again I hate to be pro Endeavor, but at least Shoto, Fuyumi, and Natsu get to respond to Endeavor's attempts at atonement on their own terms. Natsu is allowed to be angry. Fuyumi gets to make the choice to forgive him. Shoto is allowed to ponder the decision. Both cases are terrible abuse narratives, but at least the Todoroki kids have a say in how they feel and are allowed to express it. Izuku doesn't even get that)

It feels like Izuku isn't even allowed to be a victim in any way, shape, or form. He's just there to prop Bakugou

[noyzinerd]

Ohmygodohmygodohmygod 😭 @raisesomehale tagged me for an excerpt-writing-thing! This is my first time getting tagged for this kind of thing, thanks so much! Excerpt from my WIP, Pseudology, where the boys have to face their inner demons in the forms of dark versions of each other. Enjoy!

"Don't tell me you're honestly surprised you're here." Nega-Derek sneered. "You always talk about how unfair it is to be dragged into all the shit that happens to you, about how you're always the first to be taken or hospitalized or the one to lose the most friends. Oh, boo-hoo. Always the victim, aren't you Stiles? Never stopping to wonder why so many things happen to you when you can never leave anything well enough alone. It's never your fault Scott follows all of your whims, right? That's on him for getting himself left out in the woods. You weren't the one who released the Nogitsune, so why would it be your fault poor Allison and all those people died? Letting the Nogitsune in had nothing to do with what happened, right?"

"Please…" The 'don't' died on his lips as the thing circled around Stiles, those colorless eyes piercing deeply into his own.

The spirit tutted in mock disappointment. "And what about me, Stiles? You've found a way to manipulate me into loving you just like you did Lydia. Now here I am, willing to die for you in your ridiculous ocean of lies and secrets. Are you going to get bored and leave me too? When is that trophy of catching the most sought-after specimen going to lose its charm and have you kicking me out on the street, broken and empty? Do I deserve it too, just like Lydia? She ignored you for years and used you to get at someone who hurt her. Apparently, that's all the reason in the world to get back at her, make her suffer for making you feel this way. She was your claim, your property, to treat however you wanted because her actions displeased you. It made you want to watch her cry. It made you want to insert yourself into her life and to make her yours even if you had to drag her in, kicking and screaming. Am I just another Lydia to you? Am I here because you like me or am I here for you to punish for bullying you? Is that what you want? To see me cry over you? Does it make you feel powerful having so much control over me? Does it flatter your ego to know that the big, bad, strong, former-Alpha Derek Hale, the Derek Hale, is so helpless to your charm that he can't even go a single day without thinking about you? Do you even know what I am to you?"

Stiles had nowhere else to back up. His feet were frozen. The words kept gnawing at his brain, twisting in his chest like a noose around his heart. Covering his ears hadn't helped. The sound of that too-familiar, but too-wrong voice was infesting his ears in a way that rang in his mind rather than his ears, starting inward and echoing out like the words were coming from his very soul. There was nothing he could say. He couldn't fight the words.

Especially since he knew they were all true.

"Ha! You don't even know!" Nega-Derek practically squealed delightedly. "Chatty Cathy Stiles suddenly with nothing to say. Well, isn't that just a rare sight! Finally ran out of bullshit to spew from that poisonous little goblin mouth, I see. That's fine. I have enough to talk about for the both of us," the thing chirped happily.

Sorry, I've never done this before so I'm terrible at tagging, especially since I don't know how many of you are actually writers. Also, am I supposed to just tag mutuals or just anyone? 😰I don't actually have a lot of mutuals, so I guess whoever else out there feels like writing, feel free to say I tagged you (no one's going to double check that shit 🤣). Literally no pressure tags: @cursedtruth, @gynnnicsworld, @grimmypuff, @haleshomeforthederanged, @princecharmingwinks, @raisesomehale

[spacebarbarianweird]

For the parental HCs prompts:

Hide and seek with the amazing Alethaine? Vampire vs. Barbarian vs. Dhampir and

see who wins (I bet on Alethaine because she sneaky!)

Summary: Astarion plays hide-in-seek with his daughter but it doesn't go smoothly.

Pairing: Astarion x OC (Tiriel)

Tags: hurt/comfort, fluff, dadstarion

Alethaine's age: 6-year-old

Read on AO3

Masterlist

Headcanons

Dadstarion prompts

“Now my turn to hide!” Alethaine squeals as she waves to Astarion from the ground.

Astarion chuckles and jumps from the branch. There is no point in hiding from Alethaine – as a dhampir, she just knows where he is. 

Sometimes Astarion thinks it’s a blessing – his daughter will always be able to find him, no matter what. But then he remembers the 7000 spawns released in  the Underdark. How many of them have already conceived children? Pale half-vampires, born one foot in their parents’ graves?

And how many of them have decided to hunt vampires?

Will Astarion ever be safe, after all? Or will his mercy towards his victims be the end of him?

“But I will hide very very well, much better than you!” the six-year-old elf’s ears twitch in anticipation.

It’s a dark night, way past midnight and the dark woods of the Unicorn Run are as unsettling to mortals as possible.

But Astarion and his daughter aren’t mortals; thus, the woods have become their playground. Here, in the dark of the night, Astarion can forget about his vampirism and his limitations in the daylight. Here and now, he is the father of this little girl and he plays hide-and-seek with her. 

What can be more normal?

“Alethaine, don’t run too far away, '' he tells her strictly.

She nods and grins. Another weird quirk of the little dhampir. Astarion can’t catch her scent, so he tracks her the same way he does with Tiriel. Her heartbeat is so quiet he can’t hear it. She is invisible to him the same way she would have been if they were mortal elves.

“Count to… twenty!” She tells him and once Astarion turns away she disappears in the woods. 

Astarion tries to hear her footsteps but they soon fade away. He stops counting and slowly moves forward.

There is something natural about this game. Something that appeals to his predatory side. Astarion makes no sounds looking for the hiding girl.

Thanks to the dark vision he sees perfectly – and he also catches heartbeats and breathings of different night animals that hide in fear sensing the presence of the undead. 

Alethaine is nowhere to be seen or heard.

Astarion feels the wave of panic but suppresses it. She just hid somewhere in the bushes or in the leaves. Soon when he fails to find her she will run to him laughing and mocking him for “failing such a simple task”.

But it doesn’t happen.

“Alethaine!” he calls her out. “Alethaine, are you all right?”

No answer. His daughter has just disappeared. 

Old habits that refuse to die heighten his new fears. He lost his daughter. Something bad has happened to her. What is he going to tell Tiriel? What if Alethaine is wounded? What if someone kidnapped her?

What if she’s fallen down on the rocks and died?

“Alethaine!” Now his voice trembles and he feels his body freeze.

Mistakes mean punishment. Punishment means pain. Even now when there is no one to torture him, his mind can perfectly do it.

Astarion calls for Alethaine and searches her across the area, but she is just gone as if taken by a fey. Maybe she has been? There are so many dark creatures who love to mess up with little kids. Well, whoever and whatever did this must know that Astarion is very good at breaking contracts and beating the shit out of powerful bastards who deceive and manipulate.

Another wave of fear makes his skin itch.

The sunrise.

He looks to the east and sees that the skies are turning lighter and the stars start disappearing.

“Fuck!” Astarion’s voice is already hoarse. “ALETHAINE!”

He needs to come back to the town. Run to their home that was built in the underground part of Daggerlake and tell Tiriel what has happened. He is embarrassed, he hasn’t felt so much guilt since…. forever.

He had one job – to take care of their daughter. And he failed. He’s lost his child in the woods.

Of course, he couldn’t be trusted. Who the fuck would think he could be a good father?

Astarion rushes home driven by a terror only the undead know. The fear of burning.

“Astarion!” Tiriel who’s spent the whole night in the tavern in the upper-town and probably has just come back stares at him anxiously. “Where… Where is Alethaine?!”

“I am so sorry… She… just…disappeared…” Astarion sits on the porch and grabs a fistful of his hair. “It was sunset… I couldn’t… stay…”

Tiriel casts a glance at him and he subconsciously expects anger but sees nothing but motherly fear.

“It’s all right… I am going to look for her. She has probably just hidden somewhere”

“What if something bad happened to her? I will never forgive myself!” Astarion sniffs. 

Tiriel, still dizzy after the merry night, takes her two-handed ax. “I will find her. Don’t worry. How far were you from the tunnel?”

“Maybe half a mile. It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have taken her to the woods”

“Don’t be stupid, love. You can’t be outside the lower town in the daylight. When else are you supposed to play and walk with her?” she kisses his cheek. 

Astarion nods but he knows Tiriel is scared to death, she just never shows it up when he is afraid too. And he is sorry for that, too.

**

Alethaine has cried her eyes out. 

At first, it sounded like a good idea to hide a bit further in the woods. Her dad is a vampire and he can find her! But then she saw a weird-looking butterfly and followed it, enchanted by its blue wings. 

And the dhampir got lost.

She started calling for Dad, but he couldn't hear her and she had no idea how far she wandered. Then, Alethaine decided that maybe Dad returned home and she needed to do it too but the narrow pathways of the dark woods took Alethaine even further. 

She has never felt so lonely and scared in her life.

Alethaine cried hoping her dad would hear her, but no one came. Now, she is sitting on a small boulder in the center of the clearance and the sun is showering the woods in its light.

Alethaine is hungry.

And tired.

It’s way past noon, the last time she ate was when she left home with dad – mother told them she would go to drink some ale in the tavern.

The dhampir sniffs.

She wants home. She wants to eat. She wants to sleep. She wants her parents. Her stuffed toys. 

Alethaine starts crying again.

“Alethaine!” She hears her mother’s voice from a distance. 

“Mum! Mum!” Alethaine jumps on her feet. Her dhampir hearing immediately identifies where Tiriel is, and the girl rushes there.

The red-headed woman lifts her up and hugs her. Alethaine wails and presses her little face to her mother’s shoulder.

“Where have you been?!” Tiriel pulls Alethaine away and starts looking at her arms and legs trying to see if she is wounded. “Dad told you not to wander too far, how come you’ve disappeared?”

She sniffs.

“I wanted… I wanted… To hide better… And then… there was a butterfly…”

Tiriel squeezes her lips and Alethaine senses how her mother’s fear is being replaced by anger.

It's not easy to make Tiriel angry, but Alethaine, like any child, managed to do that.

“Your father is scared to death. I was scared to death. What if someone took you?”

Within the next half an hour Alethaine hears all the possible stories about children who were taken by feys, and hags, eaten by wolves, kidnapped by giants, frozen to death, drowned in rivers, and died of open wounds. Every story feels like a slap and, even though none of her parents have ever gotten physical on her, Alethaine suspects being spanked wouldn’t be that scary in comparison to the horrors her mother tells in the barbarian voice she uses against her enemies.

“Let’s go home” Tiriel lifts Alethaine up again. “No sweets till the end of the week. And you aren’t going to play outside until you learn how to follow the rules.”

“But mum!”

“You heard me, Alethaine.”

Alethaine places her cheek on her mother’s shoulders. The fear is taking its grip on the dhampir’s half-dead heart and she just wants to hide under the blanket at home.

**

Astarion tries to occupy his mind with something at least. Worrying won’t do him any good. He needs to wait till Tiriel is back and, gods, he hopes Alethaine has just got lost. And that nothing bad has happened.

It’s been too long.

Tiriel left at the early summer sunrise. And now it’s almost evening.

Astarion takes one of his books out. It’s a collection of short stories for kids he found in a dungeon a year ago, but, once he opened it for the first time he realized it’s actually a guide on how to join the thief guild written in Thieves Cant. It’s been years since he practiced the language for the last time and it feels like a good mind exercise.

And then he hears the familiar scent. 

Tiriel is coming back.

Astarion can’t understand if she carries Alethaine or not, and he’s afraid his wife is coming back alone.

He rushes outside and sees Tiriel coming back with Alethaine in her arms. The fear lets him go and he runs to them to truly make sure she is fine.

“Where did you… Gods…” he gasps, taking Aletaine from her hands. The girl's face is puffy because of how long she’s cried. 

“She ran away. And got lost.”

“I told her not to…” Astarion presses Alethaine to his chest as if fearing she would disappear.

“Well, I suppose she’s learned her lesson. And will learn it even better,” Tiriel repeats what punishment Alethains is going to receive. 

Astarion places sleepy Alethaine on a bench and helps her to undress. It's obvious the girl needs to bathe and eat, but she is barely conscious so he decides to bring her night dress and let her do the rest once she wakes up.

The word “punishment” ties a knot in his stomach.

“Tiriel, she almost died! I think it’s enough punishment,” he says once Alethaine is put to bed. The girl hugs a plushie dragon and immediately falls asleep.

“It's not enough, '' Tiriel says, closing the door. “Astarion, please, I know what it reminds you of. Punishment, disobedience. Running away. Your master twisted the idea of a family making you call him his father and other spawns your siblings. But there is nothing internally bad about punishing a child for breaking rules.”

“She almost died!” Astarion insists. “She is scared.”

Tiriel shakes her head. 

“Alethaine is much stronger than me. She can already take my ax! She is stronger than you and, soon, she will understand it. And if she decides to run away in the daylight you won't be able to stop her. Imagine her hooking up with someone older than her, who can manipulate her? Alethaine will just go not knowing what dangers lie ahead! And we won’t be able to do anything! We need to punish her for what she did. Because what she did could have killed her. Actions have consequences and we both have to be on board with that. You can’t be “the good parent” in this scenario. Because if you spoil her rotten and I try to impose rules, she will just do whatever she wants.”

Astarion clenches his fists. Rules. Disobedience.

And now one more terrible similarity.

Many of his victims, the ones who weren’t just lonely travelers or drunkards, were those careless young people, girls and boys, who, for some reason, thought nothing would happen if they got wasted with a handsome stranger in a shady tavern. Or someone would save them from vampires if they fucked up.

Kids who knew no dangers were coddled by their parents from this dangerous world and were killed for that.

“I agree. She needs to learn,” Astarion finally says.

It doesn’t go smoothly. Alethaine, probably being sure that it was all just words, asks for gingerbread after dinner and starts crying after a rejection.

“No sweets,” Tiriel reminds her.

Alethaine looks at Astarion with her puppy eyes but he shakes his head showing that there can’t be any disagreement between him and Tiriel.

Then, they don’t let her go to play with the neighbor’s kids who come to pick her up on their way to the river which causes another meltdown that stops the moment Alethaine realizes her cries aren’t working.

Unluckily for her, both her parents can withstand much worse things than the meltdown of a six-year-old.

**

The young man in a rich red doublet looks anxious. All his arrogance and pride have disappeared the moment he realizes people call Astarion a vampire for a reason.

“Will you… Will you do what I ask?” he cocks his head. The heir of one of the local jarls, the boy has gotten used to getting what he wants. And now he is bound by a pact with a hag who will turn him into a gnoll if he fails to deliver her his bride, and he needs to ask a vampire for help.

“One hundred and fifty gold. And you pay the half right now. I will come to your father for the rest once we’ve done” Astarion plays with his dagger trying to look as distraught as possible. 

“That’s insane! Eighty gold!”

“I have a family to feed, boy. '' Astarion chuckles. “Besides, you were dumb enough to make a pact with the hag. What did you want? Money? Power? More lands? Didn’t your parents teach you not to meddle with things you can't understand?”

The young man huffs. Then he notices Tiriel, who watches the whole conversation in silence – and cringes at the sight of a fresh bite mark she hasn’t hidden. 

Astarion suppresses the desire to beat the guest. 

“I was dying in the swamps… She… It…”

“Offered you salvation because you told her you would do anything?” Tiriel finishes the sentence. 

“I can hire an adventure party to slay the hag! I thought you were going to help me with the contract but you aren't the only one who does this kind of work!” 

Tiriel laughs. “There will be at least six adventurers and each of them will demand a fair share. And if they make it out alive, there will be one with good intimidation and persuasion skills - and you will end up paying much more. Oh, and there is a big chance they will make a deal with the hag and will bring you to her because hags usually have more things to offer.”

“They… They won't!”

“I've been an adventurer since I was fifteen. Trust me, I know my kind. I would have made a pact with the hag.”

“To be fair,” Astarion adds. “You murdered the hag.”

“Wyll dealt the final blow. And I was staying in the corner of her lair contemplating what choices led me to have a tadpole in my brain, a vampire in my bed, and ‘killing the devil’ in my to-do list.”

“The devil you’d made a pact with, which I told you not to do,” Astarion reminds her.

“Hm, it ended up well, didn’t it? I was also advised against giving you blood and meddling with your master. I did both,” Tiriel presses the young man’s shoulder causing him to yelp in pain. “Astarion is your best choice. You don’t need a monster hunter. You need a magistrate.”

The young man looks absolutely defeated and then calls his bodyguard, a half-orc woman who puts a few small sacks of gold on the table. 

“Don’t involve my father in this, once you’ve done, come to me and I’ll pay the rest”

“No,” Astarion bares his fangs. “We go together. And you follow my every order”

Tiriel takes the money and leaves the room to store the gold in the basement of their house.

Suddenly, the guest looks up at the ceiling and mutters something incomprehensible. Astarion follows his sight and sees Alethaine standing right above the table upside down. She wears her black dress and her long hair is braided. 

“Is she a vampire?” The bodyguard asks.

“Dhampir. This is my daughter, Alethaine. Princess, don’t scare my clients. Come down and say ‘hello’.”

Alethaine does not react. She just sits on the ceiling and observes the visitors. Astarion shrugs.

“Not very talkative today,” Astarion continues. “We go at sunset through the underground tunnels. Don’t worry, I won’t drag you to the Underdark. Unless you really piss me off. Wait for me in the tavern. Now go, I need to prepare for the road.” Astarion bares his fangs again, enjoying the fear on the guests’ faces. 

Alethaine jumps from the ceiling once the strangers leave. 

“I don’t like them,” she says.

“I don’t either. Did you want anything?”

“Daddy, are you going to be away for long?”

“Maybe a month. Don’t worry, I will be home before the winter starts”

Alethaine frowns. 

“I am sorry. For running away. I won’t do this again. Can we play in the woods when you are back?”

Astarion studies his daughter’s face. There is an honest guilt in her pitch-black eyes. 

“Apologies accepted. Come here.”

Alethaine wraps her pale hands around his neck and he enjoys the sound of her heartbeat for a few moments.

“Can I go out with my friends while you are away?”

“Yes. But only in the town.”

It takes Astarion an hour to get ready for the trip into the wild. He knows Tiriel wants to go with him, but they’ve agreed not to leave Alethaine on her own while she is so small. 

“When you are back, I will give you a very good rest, if you know what I mean,” Tiriel playfully smiles and kisses him goodbye. 

Such a normal thing, he thinks.

A father is going to do some work in the wild.

His little family will be waiting for him.

Such a normal thing and so precious to him. 

--

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[loveswrites]

Pumpkins Please Billy Loomis x Stu Marcher x reader

Pumpkins Please Billy x Reader x Stu

Word count: 1397

Time it Took me: 1 hours 30 mins

To my loves: It was so obvious that stu and billy would win for our celebration of 300 followers! I wrote it that same night so I've had it in my drafts for 6 days now. I was thinking if I should wait till the poll ended but we reached over 300 followers before it even did, So here you go loves! Enjoy! Thank you for the support. It makes me so happy you guys enjoy my writing as it is all I want to do in life.

Love <3

“I wanna carve a pumpkin.” You pouted.

“Why don’t we just crave someone up instead.” Billy smirked playing with the tip of his knife. 

“I already have the pumpkins at my house. You wanna carve em here or there?” Stu said dropping himself on the bed making you and Billy shake with the bed. 

“You didn’t tell me you bought pumpkins.” Billy said, narrowing his eyes at Stu.

“Do I have to tell you everything?” Stu laughed out.

“Yes.” You and Billy said in unison. 

Stu started to laugh but slowly stopped when he realized you and Billy were not joking. 

“I just thought I should have them at the house since you know it is halloween. You know our favorite holiday.” Stu said, looking in between you and Billy.

“It’s not my favorite holiday mine is-”

“Christmas.” The two boys groaned, making you smile.

“The moment September 1st came along you were running around here yelling out ‘It’s christmas!’” Billy mocked you but you could see the slight smile in his cheeks as he recalled the memory. 

“It’s a lovely holiday, what can I say?” You smiled rubbing your socks together. 

Billy stroked the sides of your waist with his knife sending a shiver down your spine. He did this often. To both you and Stu. Still would often get cut most of the time cause he'd always laugh or move too much. But you trusted Billy to never leave a mark on you and he never did. Never has. 

Billy had three favorite things. His knives. His girl. And his best friend.

“Do we have to go to school tomorrow?” You questioned as Stu rubbed your legs while he stared up at the ceiling.

“You wanna skip again? Something on your mind, pretty girl?” Stu questioned. 

“Is someone bothering you? I can handle that, you know.” Billy said with stern eyes as he watched you respond.

“No no none of that I’m fine and no ones bothering me. I just don’t want to go and talk to people you know?” You said, stressed by the thought of even being in that building. 

“When do your parents get back in town?” Billy asked, putting his knife on your nightstand after taking one last long drag against your skin that sent tingles throughout your body.

Your parents had left for a business trip so you invited your two boyfriends to keep you company because why not? They weren’t doing anything before you called anyways.

“Sometime next week. It might get extended depending on some things. They told me I could go with them as always but I wanted to stay.” You said snuggling into Billy’s side.

“I would’ve left. No school and a free trip as a replacement sounds fun right about now.” Stu said, making you smile knowing that he wouldn’t just leave. He’d make sure that you and Billy were able to come as well. No matter if he wanted to admit it or not Stu couldn’t live without Billy nor you. 

Looking up at Billy who had his eyes closed you know he couldn’t live without you or Stu also. He wouldn’t admit it but he shows his love in crazy ways. Rather that’s spray painting the sides of buildings to pulling pranks on literally anybody to actual crimes. Billy has killed for you and Stu. If someone hurt one of you two you either never saw them again or saw them in the news the next day. Same if it was reversed with Stu but Stu doesn’t really clean his tracks very well so it’s mostly just Billy. 

You wondered if loving them made you a bad person. You wondered if keeping their victims a secret made you a murder. You wondered if not feeling a drop of remorse made it seem like you have the knife in your hand. 

But at the end of the day you didn’t really care because at the end of these dark sad thoughts all you saw was Billy and Stu. The two crazy boys who were in love with you. The two boys who showed you the world and would kill anyone who got in the way of your happy fairytale. You just prayed that they wouldn’t be the one to ruin your love story. 

You woke up the next morning feeling relaxed and refreshed. This made you just up and check the time. 1:24 pm. Shit you thought I missed damn near all of school. Rubbing your eyes you noticed that your bed was empty. Where did they go? Getting out of your bed you walked downstairs. Hearing voices, you followed them to the kitchen.

“Dumbass! the butter goes first, did you not read the box?” Billy snapped hitting Stu in the back of his head with said box. 

“You didn’t say that!” Stu said, trying to defend himself as he wiped his cheek leaving some flour in its place making you smile. 

“Maybe if you looked at the box I wouldn’t have to say it!” Billy fussed back. Stu opened his mouth to say something but that's when you decided to make yourself known.

“So are you two gonna bicker all day or tell me what you're doing?” You questioned walking fully into the kitchen.

“Baking you some cookies. Again..” Stu said, making you frown your eyebrows.

“Again?” You questioned.

“Stu burned the first batch.” Billy said, rolling his eyes.

“I did not! They just cooked a little bit longer than the rest.” Stu finished.

“Burnt.” You and Billy said in unison. That was happening a lot more often than usual. 

“We just wanted to do something nice for you before you woke up.” Stu said sneezing all over the batter when he rubbed flour on his face.

“What the fuck Stu!” Billy yelled while you just turned your nose up at the fact that he just sneezed on the batter.

“It’s fine. I’m not hungry. Like at all. I just wanna carve pumpkins okay? That’s it.” You said shifting your eyes between Billy and Stu.

“I’ll go get the pumpkins then.” Stu said starting to move, making you and Billy scream out ‘No!’.

“No! I’ll do it,  just stay here.” Billy said, shaking his head as he walked past you but not before giving you your ‘morning kiss’.

“You keep touching me I’m gonna throw pumpkin guts all over you.” You yelled out. Stu’s elbow kept touching yours as he attempted to show you how to carve your pumpkin.

“I’m trying to help you! You're doing it all wrong, trust me I do pumpkins.” Stu stated as if he was some kind of Pumpkin master.

“You do pumpkins?” You laughed out, tightening the grip on the knife in your hand.

“Shut up if I did you’d be jealous of the pumpkin.” Stu said, rolling his eyes. 

“As if, Who wants to sleep with you?” You questioned going back to cutting your pumpkin.

“You!” Stu said laughing as if that was the funniest thing in the world.

“Only on holidays.. Billy gets Monday through friday.” You said poking your tongue out at Stu to which he leaned in and bit your tongue making you jump back squealing in surprise. 

“Good thing Halloween is coming up.” Stu grinned. 

“Billy, he bit me!” You pointed at Stu with the knife in your hand. Billy pointed down to your pumpkin that was hanging on for dear life. 

“You need help, you keep cutting it like that there's not gonna be any pumpkin left.” Billy said, smirking, making Stu laugh.

“Shut up, it's perfectly fine.” You said going back to cutting pieces of the pumpkin.

“As if.” Stu snickered, earning a handful of pumpkin guts to the face.

“Hey!” Stu yelled out. 

“That’s what you get your lucky I didn’t throw the whole pumpkin!” You yelled.

“What pumpkin?!” Stu yelled back making you gasp.

“Billy!” You yelled.

“God.” Billy said, holding his head in his hands still with the knife in his hand. All he could hear was you two fighting with each other

He was in for a long bumpy ride if he wanted to be with you two forever. But watching the two of the most important people in his life bicker made him realize that he would kill any bump in that road to make them happy.  

[mikhailwrites]

MWIII Campaign thoughts&opinion

⚠️SPOILERS AHEAD (OBVIOUSLY)⚠️

Alright, here we go. Modern Warfare III. Disclaimer: I've been part-timing as videogame journalist (not in EN, obviously) for the past 10 years so this might read a bit like a review which this is not.

It's been a year since we watched the 141 sit in the bar in Chicago and look at the photo of one Vladimir Makarov. And the day of reckoning is finally here, at least for those of us with eaely access to the campaign.

The game opens, surprisingly, from the Konni perspective. As one of Konni soldiers, you infiltrate the prison to free your boss. First look at Makarov is menacing and leaves an impression.

Speaking of Makarov, however, I can't but feel like the writers had dropped the ball. It's obvious they were trying to go for the unhinged psychopath vibe but honestly, so many Makarov's lines borders on ridiculous, oftentimes crossing the line entirely. At times, I felt like I'm watching an old 007 villain and I don't mean it in the good way.

Most glaring example was in the Flashpoint mission. As Price and Soap capture Makarov after bombing the stadium in Verdansk, the terrorist then taunts and mocks them, revealing to know their names and threatening them with a revenge. The dialogue is, frankly, on a bad side and Makarov in that scene sounded to me more like a spoiled, rich teenager than much feared leader of a private army with ambition to start another World War.

It also contrasted wildly with the continuation of the scene where we see Soap almost lose it, tackling Makarov and pressing a gun to his head while Price tries to dissuade him from killing the criminal on the spot. That bit was well executed and I really liked it.

What I also liked was the Passenger mission and the very unique perspective we got as players, feeling the helplessness of the victim as it's forced to play role of a terrorist, solely based on their ethnicity. The "You're not a terrorist, but you look like one," line felt very powerful, especially in the context of current affairs.

The whole campaign felt very rushed and, in my opinion, the total commitment to the "race against the clock" hurt the narration a lot. There is not a moment of respite and every piece of the puzzle is delivered in a manner so hurried, I sometimes had trouble following it.

Especially in the Danger Close mission as we, similarly to MWII, operate Shadow Company gunship to provide air support, and out of nowhere, we get a shout that there's a helo nearby and Makarov's in it.

We then proceed to shoot the helicopter down and Makarov is seemingly KIA. Well, he's obviously not but the whole scene is delivered in such a luckluster manner that I was wondering if I perhaps missed some cutscene or debrief (I didn't) and was asking myself if the developers are even serious.

The overall pacing is off, especially compared to MWII and this leads to the lack of impact and emotional response.

Which brings us to the more sensitive part of this post. Being a Ghost/Soap shipper, I was happy to see the two interact and to pick up the rapport established in the previous game. Like many others, I, too, would appreciate more time with them, but I would appreciate more missions and longer campaign rather than cut other characters' screen time.

When they are on the screen, banter is usually quick to follow. Soap and Ghost interact easily with each other, hinting at a natural progress of their relationship. The Milena interrogation is especially great in this regard.

And then there's that ending. Honestly, I knew someone would die. I think it was pretty much given. Still, I had my bets on Ghost, thinking that Soap was way too fresh and had his whole career ahead of him to be sacrificed. Well, I was wrong.

In the confines of the story, it makes sense it's him. There is major foreshadowing happening in the Verdansk mission and when Soap ends up going with Price at the end, well, it was clear. Soap almost killed Makarov years prior, Price stopped him, and now Makarov comes and kills Soap right in front of Price. The choices and consequences. It makes sense.

But.

But it serves no purpose. It's literally the last mission, so what could've served as the major catalyst for the big finale - rest of 141 coming for Makarov for some good old revenge - just ends up rather sour. Especially since Johnny, during his last struggle, as he saves Price's life, doesn't even manage to kill Makarov, only injuring him, albeit badly.

It gets worse when you realise that during both games, Soap didn't get any justice at all. In MWII, he seemingly kills Graves, taking a revenge for the betrayal and the Alone mission. Only for Graves to casually reappear later, stating he wasn't in the tank that the game clearly stated he was in.

And now he loses his life without taking Makarov with him. It's... beyond sad for the character to get treated this badly by the narration.

The team's response to his death is a bit mild as well. It starts well, with Ghost scrambling to him as soon as he spots him, feeling for vitals even though it has to be clear to him that he's gone, that felt gutwrenching. But after that? It's... lacking some stronger emotional response. They say their farewells to Johnny, a single sentence each (and, my god, did they truly think the "he was the best of us" clichè would work on any level whatsoever?), scattering his ashes, and that, too, as great as the animation was, just... felt a bit hollow and artificial.

There are ways to kill a beloved character to make it feel truly heartbreaking and meaningful. The scriptwriters here should've taken notes from Destiny 2's Forsaken DLC for example. They could've used Soap's death in a myriad of ways, including making player to choose between, say, saving Soap and letting Makarov escape. Or between saving Soap and defusing the bomb. Or just about dozen other narrative choices that would make Soap's death more meaningful and would have much bigger impact on the player.

As it is, I cannot help but say my own farewell words: Johnny died, but what for?

[fierceawakening]

Because it’s on my mind , I wanted to talk a bit about what I remember of baeddelism when I’d was going around.

Full disclaimer I am not a trans woman, nor am I doing research on the era. So I neither claim to be unbiased nor do I claim to accurately remember everything. I just want to set down what I remember so I have it.

My recollection of how it started was that a trans woman user on tumblr noticed an etymological chart on I think Wikipedia, which said that the English word bad is related to an Old Norse word baedle, which was a term for an effeminate male. In that culture such people were seen as evil or creepy for doing woman things, and their doing so was associated with what we might call black magic.

A group of trans women on tumblr really liked this, and embraced the insulting ancient term in a similar way to how many people embrace queer. “You call me bad for being AMAB and a woman, I call that fine with me.” Baeddel started popping up in lots of trans women’s usernames.

(I do not know if the etymology is accurate. Nor do I know if the ancient term referred to people considered feminine men, considered gender confused, considered to have women’s temperaments or souls, etc.)

What you also saw with this group, though, was an emphasis on being assigned male (as they phrased it, CAMAB for Coercively Assigned Male At Birth, a phrase that has been criticized as ripped off from the intersex community, where people are recognized as physically ambiguous at birth by doctors but a binary assignment is picked anyway.) This was a little surprising at least to me, as the movement I was seeing was away from terms like MTF or FTM that emphasized assigned sex.

So you started seeing the mocking trans men phrased as mocking AFAB people. “Theyfabs” was popular, the idea being that trans masculine people say we don’t fully identify as men because we don’t want to get kicked out of women’s spaces, a neat trick we get to do that trans lesbians don’t.

But our AGAB is fixed. It’s something a doctor says and that gets put on a birth certificate. Once you have it, it doesn’t change.

Which leads to seeing people as inherently evil or inherently good. If you’re (C)AMAB you’re a victim, doomed to be mislabeled a predator. If you’re (C)AFAB you’re privileged, destined to get all the pussy be accepted by lesbians.

But whenever people make a trait destiny, the lends itself to Manicheanism.

So how do you get from “we trans women are cursed to never be accepted” to “we must be put first?”

Well, there’s already an echo of that in leftism anyway, and most gay and trans USians are leftists.

Leftists really like (for good reason imo, I count myself somewhere between “pretty lefty Dem” and “less extreme progressive”) the idea that a lot of social inequality is about certain groups being left out of the discussions and events that shape policy and culture, so the thing to do is listen to those voices first.

Couple that with “around birth you’re sorted and that sorting matters, but for us trans folks that sorting is wrong and painful, and you get, from virtuous to vicious:

Transfem: assigned male, rejects patriarchy/opts out. Most virtuous.

Cis woman: assigned female, oppressed by pstrarchy. Fights oppression but not by leaving high social starts behind. Pretty mid, unless they’re a TERF.

Cis man: assigned male, benefits from patriarchy. Doesn’t reject it, as he’s got a fairly cushy deal and why meds with that. Kind of gross, as shown by unwillingness to refuse the system.

Trans man: assigned female. Opprsssed by patriarchy. Deals with it by doing everything possible to reject assignment. Essentially begging for status and not caring who knows ir. Selfishness incarnate. Pretty fuckin evil.

Some people might think this couldn’t possibly be how any transfem person thinks—isn’t being trans about internal feelings, not relationship to patriarchy?

Usually, yes! But I think the emphasis on ASAB, coupled with the (correct) idea floating around that you don’t need dysphoria to be trans, led these people to focus less on internal sense and more on politics.

My evidence for this belief is that you started to see a lot of posts by these particular transfems saying things like “Ever wanted to be a girl? You can just be one! No particular internal states required!” You started to see a lot of talk by these blogs about trying to look for and crack eggs, talked about less like “I’m going to go look for nominally cis men who seem unhappy and tell them transition is possible” and more like “I’m going to plaster this everywhere to recruit.”

As I see it, the reason everyone is suddenly so chatty about transmisandry is not that we just made it up. It’s that these people had a stranglehold on discourse for a long time, and transmascs who saw it could either openly reject it and be labeled MRAs, silently ignore it and not be heard, or believe it and internalize that choosing not to just live with our dysphoria (when transfems get to have HRT for theirs!) makes us literally evil and selfish.

It often takes a while, when someone is no longer being abused, for them to come up with language to describe what happened. The reaction can be immediate, but can sometimes be a few years delayed. That’s what I think happened here. You’re seeing us talk about transmisandry now because we’re feeling safer to say “no, that’s fucked up, we aren’t just sex gods at the dyke bar, listen to us.”

Do I think that everyone around currently who thinks “transmisandry as a term implies misandry is systemic, and we shouldn’t do that” ascribes to this weird valence flipped “assigned male good, assigned female bad” gender essentialism?

No, but I think it’s reasonable to wonder if someone might, and thus reasonable to say “don’t tell people to stop using that word. Replace it in your head with ‘transphobia,’ shrug, and find another hill to die on.

[fernsproutxx]

My fnaf lore.

anywhooo… here it goes! just to note; i have written down what happens in the security breach era, but it enters more into au territory tbh, so that will probably be a secondary reblog to this post later, since i have still to add ruin into the mix.

but without much further ado, enjoy reading my lore interpretation of this franchise (i focus mostly in satisfying narrative than being accurate)

William Afton, born on the 2nd of November in 1939 as an only child, lived in England with his parents. He was a smart child who got placed in bad circumstances by no fault of his. He was born susceptible to mental illness, afraid about his head, but the abuse from his Father after he made it back from war in 1945 shaped William terribly (If you wanna know how I picture William’s childhood, it’s pretty much just like in “His Empire of Dirt” please for the love of god read that fic it’s so good i can’t even-)

Everyone is the victim of a victim.

William moved to the USA [Hurricane, Utah] in 1958, pursuing better studies for a major in engineering and a minor in business. But also at the same time to get as far away as he could from his abusive Father. He got a part-time job at a local restaurant too.

He meets Henry Emily (born on 25/Apr/1946) in college in September of 1964, and William finds himself intrigued about how his new colleague’s mind works, even seeing a little of himself in him. William is captivated by him, his ideas, and his being.

He grows attached to Henry, as for that period Henry is the only constant in William’s life, due to him having no one to rely on when he moved alone to another country.

Without noticing, William becomes obsessed with Henry, writing in stacks of journals. Envy and admiration blind him when bearing witness to the seemingly good childhood Henry had, unlike him.

Straight William doesn’t exist, his brain just really said no homo, so he has internalized homophobia smh. Henry is straight in this, and he’s completely oblivious to William’s feelings. So it’s pretty much a one-sided thing but that one side is in denial.

Henry found William odd, unnerving, and rude at first but soon got accustomed to his presence. In the end, he felt good that finally someone intently listened to his uncommon ideas instead of saying how his projects and dreams wouldn’t get him anywhere. Having a close friend felt good for once.

Later on, William, like the jealous and obsessive bastard he is, just wants to be equal to Henry. They’re very competitive, like at first they’re just competitive in a friendly manner but as time goes on, that same competitiveness begins to corrupt William.

In November of 1965 in the middle of one of their class lessons, both of them brainstormed about opening a franchise together, Fazbear Entertainment.

Henry brought it up first as a joke, as all things usually did between the two. This time though, William enhanced the idea further than expected. He followed the lead and threw even more things into the mix. Things like how both could incorporate robotics with entertainment and how William could take care of the financial side of things.

It started as a joke, but then William dig deeper, and soon enough, Henry’s joke became something more.

While both were still finishing their studies they began the first project for their growing franchise, Fredbear’s Family Diner, as well as making the blueprints for its respective animatronics.

In May of 1968, months before their graduation both William and Henry walked around the campus. William catches a glimpse of a young ballerina at the auditorium, Cecily Schmidt (born on 29/May/1944). Henry mocks him about how dumbfounded he looked by the ballerina as if he’s never seen a woman before (lmao).

Later William would find himself at the back of the auditorium every time Cecily performed, marveling about her fluent and intricate movements, imagining one of his creations moving in that same hypnotic way.

One day William was caught off guard by Cecily, and she told him how she had seen him watching her since the beginning. William was surprised she had even noticed him since she seemed so deep into her choreography that Cecily used to always dance with her eyes closed.

They talked for a while, and Cecily found William quite charming. From then on they would always talk when she finished her practice sessions. William learns that Cecily suffers from Cystic Fibrosis and that it might cut short her dancing career.

Around July of 1968, William began to show interest in the theatrical (he even learned how to play the banjo, like terrifyingly good at it xd). He got so invested in acting that he decided he wanted to perform in Fredbear’s, so he alone came up with the idea of building the animatronics to double as wearable costumes (this was also to save some money). That’s how the spring-lock suit blueprints came to be.

It’s graduation night (16/Dec/1968) and everyone gets drunk as fuck. Henry drags William to a party at someone’s frat house where they don’t even know the host.

William was just watching Henry from afar while leaning against the wall as he drank a beer, then another, and another, and…

He doesn’t remember what happened that night. When William wakes up he's completely wasted on the floor in the master bedroom, as if he had rolled off the bed and the fall didn't wake him up. He was completely alone though, and the room was trashed.

He also wasn’t the only person that had passed out too (there were more knocked out persons in the living room and one with their head inside a toilet kekw).

On the 23rd of January 1969, William finds out Cecily is pregnant and she keeps saying that the kid is his which he blatantly denies, until she brings up the prom night. The night he doesn’t remember. He still denies it even when knowing she might be right.

Around February of the same year, Henry announces that he’s marrying Isabella Barnett (born on 31/Jan/1946 (if you know you know)). William then proposed to Cecily out of spite of Henry having a wife, and since she was already pregnant with his son he just took the chance like the competitive bastard he grew to be.

Michael is born on the 16th of August 1969 (n i c e), and William has a lingering hatred towards him but decides to put it aside for once. Henry had a child with Bella a little over a year later, and they named her Charlotte Emily (born on 7/Jun/1970).

William starts to slowly fall in love with Cecily in 1972, and they have another child, Elizabeth (whom they nickname Abby) born on the 11th of August 1973. Later on the 23rd of September 1976, they decided to adopt a boy, Evan (born on 13/May/1975).

In 1979, Fazbear Entertainment was founded and Fredbear's Family Diner was built as well as the spring-lock animatronics. Audiotapes were recorded as a means of training employees. One day while wearing the Springbonnie suit the locks fail, impaling William, but he survives despite being left scarred.

The spring-lock animatronics are retired from their wearable mode until further notice, so they instead start using regular mascot suits as they now can afford them due to Fredbear’s Family Diner being a fairly great success ever since its opening. After a while they decide to add more members to the cast besides the golden duo; Freddy, Bonnie, Chica, and Foxy. The classics.

And for once life was good. But good things don’t last forever. Cecily’s illness strikes harder in July of 1980.

Then why did William have the Funtime animatronics even when he hadn’t shown any signs of bloodlust¿ Well, to achieve immortality still BUT not for him. Guess who did end up falling in love despite not being for the right reasons at first~ fuckin William the bitch, he fell in love with Cecily and then she got sick af, but since he can’t make a cure he rather find a way around and cheat death for someone he ended up loving as one does. William experimented with animals first and while it gave positive results it didn’t get enough of what he needed so he debated on murdering children.

Between Cecily being at the hospital and William neck deep into his experiment and work, there was no one else to take care of the Afton children. Michael refused to call Uncle Henry for help, and he wouldn’t have admitted it but looking after his siblings as if he’s a parent, even if he definitely shouldn’t have had to because he’s barely a teenager, gave him a sense of normalcy because he knew that at least they weren’t being that neglected.

Cecily died from Cystic Fibrosis on the 3rd of November 1980. Michael takes it out on his brother because you know how anger is part of grief¿ Yeah…

Abby died to Circus Baby on the 11th of April 1982. Evan saw it happen from afar. This didn’t help in the slightest with Michael’s grief, and with kids being dumb in general, the bullying towards Evan gets worse. Michael just wanted to be loved just like how Father loved his brother, to have his attention.

After losing Abby, William goes apeshit (lmao), and he kills Charlotte Emily on the night of the 7th of June 1982 at a friend's party at Fredbear’s out of jealousy while wishing to make Henry feel the same way he does so they're equal. Michael loses his best friend. A little later Isabella divorces Henry due to their child being murdered, she would later pass away (29/Oct/1984) in a car crash without knowing who killed her daughter.

Around July of 1982, to make sure his youngest child, Evan, doesn’t go near any animatronic unlike his sister, William gives him a Fredbear plush with a modulated speaker and camera to monitor him at all times. He would constantly instill that the animatronics were dangerous monsters and remind him of “what he saw” when speaking at Evan through the plush, settling a new fear in him in hopes of keeping his child as far away as possible from the machines.

Evan is bullied by his older brother Michael on his birthday and forces him inside Fredbear’s mouth. Due to Evan’s tears and pushing when trying to get out, the moisture and jerky movements caused the jaw spring-locks to go back into their default position, closed.

On the 13th of May 1983, Fredbear bites Evan's head on his 8th birthday, leaving him in a coma.

“Can you hear me? I don’t know if you can hear me …I’m sorry.”

You’re broken. We are still your friends. Do you still believe that? I’m still here. I will put you back together.

Evan dies a week later due to his injury. Everything goes into an even steeper downhill.

Michael was only 13 years old when all this unfolded, and began to suffer from AvPD (avoidant personality disorder). This disorder began to develop from William’s emotional neglect and got worse after the rejection he received from others after the bite of ‘83, especially from his friend group and classmates, practically becoming an outsider.

As a punishment for what he did, in June of 1983, William tested the illusion discs with Michael by tormenting him all night with the nightmare animatronics (this is also why Michael knows how to draw nightmare fredbear in the survival logbook). Michael underwent severe sleep deprivation to the point where he even hallucinated hospital objects in his room from when he never left Evan’s bedside before passing away. If he wasn’t trying to doze off whenever he could, Mike was in a constant state of paranoia throughout the daytime.

On his first night, Michael almost didn’t make it, since right as Foxy jumped him the alarm clock blared out, leaving him with a scratch on his chin from Foxy’s hook. When telling William about it he just gaslighted him into thinking it was simply nightmares and not real for the entire week. Micheal cried for the first time since his brother died.

William did like Cecily, Evan, and Abby, he just hates Michael and blames him for everything, so their deaths add to the reason why he went apeshit, as he starts murdering children out of madness and spite towards Michael (He wanted to murder him but knew that he would get pinpointed by the police too fast). The first missing children incident happened on the 26th of June 1985. They get stuffed inside the classic animatronics plus Fredbear, and William discovers remnant. Fredbear’s Family Diner closes down in July of the same year after the backlash.

One day in November of 1985, William simply came back home to another empty bedroom. His only son had moved out to live on his own, away from anything related to his Father.

Despite not having received any prior disclosure about this, William didn’t have any reaction whatsoever and went back to his experiments without comments.

Around January of 1986, William goes on the run from Henry after they both get released from their conviction due to the lack of evidence, Henry finally realizes that William killed those kids and most likely also murdered Charlotte.

After moving out, Michael gets a small house in a social suburb where all neighbors know each other, and a job that deals with repairs and heavy machinery, nothing crazy. In April of 1986, he also meets a guy named Jeremy Fitzgerald and begins a discreet relationship with him.

In September of the same year, Fazbear Entertainment, now in the solo ownership of Henry, opens a new location, Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza (fnaf 2).

Michael receives a letter from his Father telling him about the sister location. On one of his shifts he gets a hold of the illusion disc that was removed from Funtime Freddy and takes it with him (this will be important later).

He was 17 when he died on the 5th of October 1986, his vital organs getting scooped and replaced by Ennard, worn as a rotting suit. After regaining control of his body Michael isolates himself, ignoring all the worried calls from Jeremy. He never got the chance to go to college and grow up like everyone else. He was just a kid when he died.

Michael suffers from Eisoptrophobia. The fear of seeing oneself in the mirror; is a very infrequent specific phobia. Many believe that this fear occurs in response to several factors such as superstition, poor self-image, or the result of a traumatic event. In his case, Michael is terrified of his reflection due to the likeness he shares with his Father and fears that he's just like him, a murderer. At first, he would simply cover them up with a towel or something but after getting scooped his phobia just gets worse, and he straight up just breaks all mirrors with his fist if he ever catches a glimpse.

The beginning of his phobia takes place after the bite of ‘83 when he sees his reflection. His tangled hair was greasy from the lack of a shower since he refused to leave Evan’s side. Then he saw how it curled around his neck and the dry blood that was still stuck to his hair. In a panic he started to cut it, snipping everything away. Michael refused to let his hair grow out like that, not wanting to remind himself of that day anymore, and he's not had his hair long ever since.

That’s why my Mike has short hair, and after getting scooped he gets a long wig since he doesn’t even bother to look in the mirror. Funnily enough, his facial features resemble even more those of his Father after the scoop, showing just how William already looked dead as time went by, way before actually dying.

After moving out of his Father’s house his AvPD symptoms seemed to alleviate a lot. That’s how he began to open up and be social with his neighbors and even start a relationship with Jeremy.

But you know how life tends to suddenly drag you even deeper when things barely begin to look in a positive light? Yeah, he got scooped right after “tasting the honey on his lips” of a promising future. Basically, the AvPD hit Michael like a truck in the worst way possible after getting tricked by Ennard.

Later Mike makes his mission to find his Father and make him pay for what he’s done.

Around November of 1987, William sneaks inside Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza restaurant and takes away several parts from the classic ones, making them look severely withered. Tries to make a remnant but it’s not enough with just spare parts.

In desperate need of more remnant, William goes on another killing spree, and the second missing children incident takes place. They get stuffed in the tampered toy animatronics.

The restaurant gets shut down. But one employee didn’t get the memo.

The bite of 1987 happens on the 6th day after being moved to the dayshift. Jeremy was looking for Michael all over the state but he suffered terrible consequences because of it.

When hearing about this Michael takes the job under the fake alias Fritz Smith and uses the illusion disc to pass as a normal person (who tf would employ an ourple person), but is fired the next day for tampering with the animatronics as well as his rotting odor.

Also, even though he only worked one shift, in one of his many close calls due to the animatronics being extremely aggressive, his illusion disc stopped working properly.

He also obtained his old reliable flashlight in that location, and it has never left his side since then (that shit is so big and heavy that you could kill someone with it fr).

Then the withered animatronics were reconditioned and put in a new location in 1993 (fnaf 1).

The reason Michael uses the name Mike Schmidt is bc it’s his Mother’s last name, Michael is a momma’s boy. BC MAN HIS FATHER HATES HIM SO HE JUST SPENT ALL THE TIME WITH HIS MOM EVEN AFTER HE HAD HIS SIBLINGS BUT THEN SHE DIES AND BC OF HOW MUCH IT AFFECTED HIM HE STARTS TO BULLY EVAN- FU C K.

Anyways, even after his illusion disc broke he somehow managed to get the job as a rotting corpse lmao, but Michael is fired again a week later for the same reasons as before and the place closes down.

On the 8th of February 1993, William breaks in and decides to take down the animatronics for good. However, he gets cornered by several vengeful spirits, getting spring-locked in an attempt to scare them away with the same suit he used to murder them.

The agony of his death fused his soul into this animatronic. He couldn’t move, barely able to twitch in this state. It exhausted him greatly when he tried. Just slouched over the wall, in a puddle of his dried blood.

His body spasms, wincing at the agony. He wasn’t numb. He could still feel metal in his flesh digging deeper with every movement. He groaned when trying to call out, but it sounded wheezy, filled with static from the voice box inside him. He couldn’t scream for help, despite doing his best. His body shuddered in anger, eyes flashing flickering light into the dark room he was in.

Henry visits his local to check on his failed animatronics one last time before it’s done for good but finds the classics destroyed and leading to the side room, finding William’s body inside the Spring Bonnie suit.

At first glance, Henry thought that he was dead but upon closer inspection, he noticed the flickering eyes a rasping breathing. Somehow William was still alive, but unable to move.

Henry thought this fate was well deserved. After all, he firmly believed— no, knew that William was responsible for all the murders, of Charlotte, despite nothing being proved in court.

So, with one last glance at someone he thought he once knew, he closed the door to the side room, leaving William to rot in his agony.

In later days Henry ordered the side room to be sealed off behind a fake wall.

Micheal spends the next decades looking for his Father and picking a liking to exploring abandoned places, learning the inner workings of his Father's animatronics in his spare time, which was easy since he's dealt with machinery before, and also hiding in the shadows.

[Zeitgeist Ammonium AU timeline starts here :D]

Fnaf 3 takes place in October of 2023. Michael gets a job at Fazbear's Frights, even though he hates the whole concept of an attraction based on a real tragedy. The manager even included Michael in the attraction as a security guard due to his unsettling appearance. He hated that too.

Anyways, blah blah… the ourple boy commits arson and patricide, and fnaf 6 takes placeon the 31st of January 2025. Michael pities that he once considered Henry as family.

Cassidy tortures William for eternity.

[13eyond13]

What headcannons do you have on B during his career (for a lack of a better word) as a serial killer? To me, he's like one of the funniest characters but also the most pathetic in the most poetic try-hard way. Why do you think he's such a try-hard? He's coping but what is he coping from?

OMG B!!! Haven't thought about my favourite stupid son B enough lately, so thank you for this ask....

So he's a try-hard because he is probably VERY INSECURE, to be blunt. He probably has very little sense of self-worth or a concrete sense of identity outside of trying to one-up L, and he takes that to the extreme in a highly comical way. He's also no doubt traumatized from his insane childhood as a shinigami hybrid who watched many people (including both his parents) die while knowing they were going to die / was also raised very weirdly and abusively/experimentally at Wammy's and made to feel like he was only worth something if he could be as smart and talented as the legendary L. In his mind he decided that creating his own destiny would be better and rebelled against that expectation by being like, "why be the next L when instead I could DEFEAT L by creating a brilliant crime that he can't possibly solve?"

ANYWAY there's a reason he is the most creepypasta villain / emo boi / dark academia darling of the fandom, and that highly melodramatic backstory is a huge part of it - which I DO love dearly in its own mid 2000s way, even though I also sometimes sigh at it because of the extra villainous cartoony edge it adds to L's backstory, and don't always want to take it very seriously as part of L's characterization in the manga plot...

So on my most recent re-read of the LABB novel, I feel I was a bit struck by just how... Not Good B's impression of L actually is? And this was kind of hilarious to me to think about. I feel like when I was younger and really into shipping LxB I read it just as "clearly B has a massive crush on L and is doing his best to imitate him perfectly because he hero worships him and sincerely wants to be him so bad!" HOWEVER this time around I remember thinking something along the lines of "wow, this feels almost like B just googled how to cosplay L and then lazily threw something together 5 minutes before crawling under the bed", hahaha. So he either just kinda sucks at imitating L (and maybe so, but he also managed to trick the families of the victims into letting him investigate the crime scenes, so he's probably not THAT bad at acting when he wants to be?) or maybe he's intentionally trying to make a mockery of L. It is ALSO FASCINATING from a psychological POV to imagine he's just being a troll about it all and trying to make fun of L with how he behaves! Like! Was he intentionally mocking L with his impression of him to somebody who would never even get the stupid joke in the first place? If that's the case, it's excruciatingly cringy to me that nobody even gets his joke the entire time, hahaha.... poor Naomi suffered more than Jesus at some points during that investigation, I swear...

B trying to do a scathing impression of L to somebody who has never even met him before:

ANYWAYS. I think that whatever the case, he PROBABLY hoped/expected L himself was going to show up to the crime scene to confront him, at any rate. And so therefore he probably initially dressed up as L not to genuinely pass to anybody as L, but maybe expecting to do some ominous dark mirror/ arch-nemesis big reveal shit to L?? Perhaps once he realized that Naomi was the only one coming / was working for L he just changed gears a bit and decided he'd just lead her through the clues as best he could while trying out this cosplay of the guy that he wants to offend most, but this is in my mind pretty much how it must have gone.

One of my fave headcanons about him is that he re-read that crossword puzzle he made / that the police threw out without solving SO MANY times while he was sweating off his makeup under the bed, as well... that's why he had to show it to Naomi as soon as he got out... he was like "I PUT A LOT OF WORK INTO THIS DAMMIT, and SOMEBODY is going to appreciate it" hahahaha. Ohhh, B....

[jahtrashh]

I saw your take on Zuko and like I agree so much. this fandom either idolises him or hates him and I always found that sooo weird. same goes with characters like Jet who are somehow treated like perfectly functioning adults by the fandom and held accountable of their actions as if they were grown men. and that’s so freaking weird. the point of Zuko’s redemption arc is that his arc isn’t linear, he makes mistakes, learns from it, makes up for it. as for Jet, although not a big fan of the way the writers handled his death, he’s literally being seen as an unredeemable monster, as if worse that characters like OZAI OR ZHAO by many fans and… just… how ?? why ?? they are both 16 ?? like yeah, they did so much bad stuff, they did really messed up stuff but they are also quite literally products of their environment and a freaking 100 years war. how is Zuko, fed with propaganda, on a ship since he’s 13, with a freaking general as his only paternal figure at that time, surrounded by men twice his age who are also either soldiers or at least army related, and still 16 at the time, suppose to be a “nice guy” archetype that does nothing wrong. like please be for real one second. and don’t get me started on Jet. whole village burned to the ground, orphan, had to raise so many kids, probably grew up in extreme poverty. ofc he’s messed up. ofc he’s violent, blinded by rage. but again, 16 !!! HE’S 16 !! it kills how people don’t realise that teenagers (especially teenage boys) are anything but mature, collected and emotionally rational. like bfr.

but in the atla fandom ig saying this would make me a zuko/jet apologist. whatever that means. as an adult i just see a bunch of messed up kids in the middle of the war, and that’s basically it. at best i feel bad for them, at worst i pity them.

Say it louder for the people in the back. I don’t know how to dumb it down enough for people to wrap their damn head around how these are in fact, also, teenagers involved in war. The world is in shambles during war, right and wrong are easily blurred during those times, and it takes a very special person to be able to differentiate between the sides without getting too caught up in what they believe is right or wrong.

Zuko could’ve stayed a racist, imperialist, dipshit. But by the end of the show, he turns into just a simple dipshit who accepted his life changing 180 with open arms. Yes he said some insensitive shit to aang about his beliefs and mocked his anti-violent views even when he joined them in season 3, but AGAIN, not only was he still learning how to be a decent human being, he was also blinded by his own hatred of his father, mixed with the very much pro-violent nature of the fire nation, PLUS the lack of education on Aang’s culture and philosophy which was AGAIN, taught around PRO-PA-GAN-DA the FN created. All of which, takes time to unlearn. On top of figuring himself and who he was, which is what most teenagers, more often than not will have a whole crisis about ALONE. I honestly don’t know how people expect a redemption arc to go, we’ve all had to learn how to be better about things, and the progress isn’t going to be liner nor will it always be easy. That is human nature. That is LIFE.

And on Jet’s case, why do people think it’s such a terrible thing to make some characters who were victims of war crimes, to be angry, to lust for revenge against the perpetrators, or be irrational and violent. THEY HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO. The FN took the last bit of Jet’s life that he barely even had and stripped all of that completely away from him like the savages that they are. Why is it a terrible thing to be angry at people who didn’t think twice about the families, the sense of community that his village had? I agree that Jet was going too far when he was trying to take it out on innocent people, but can you really blame him? He didn’t have an adult to help him out on the importance of emotional maturity and how to be angry at the ones who actually harmed you like Zuko did, and even if he did, teenagers won’t be emotionally matured TRULY until they develop into adults. He had to be the mock adult for the kids younger than him, he didn’t have time to decode himself and better his actions because he was too focused on protecting the freedom fighters and himself against the FN’s abuses.

People don’t realize that this is not babying them, or being so called “apologists” this is called understanding why these two are the way that they are. Why are they like this? And it’s so much to take in and talk about at once that you’d need an entire college level essay to completely break down and comprehend how deep war can affect not just adults, but teenagers and children. Those two groups don’t have true moral compasses, so the environment and circumstances can really impact and easily mold their minds to fit the standards in said situation in order to survive it. This is called self-preservation. A more than common trauma response.

I mean seriously, I heard someone say they can understand Zuko hate but not Iroh hate, when he has in fact, done much worse than Zuko has ever done in those 3 years at sea. I love Iroh, but he’s an adult, why are we choosing adults over traumatized and war-fed teenagers who mainly comply in that shit to seek approval from their actually psychotic, genocidal, narcissistic, and abusive father that would dispose of them if they didn’t fit his standards? Why are we quicker to blame the teenagedvictim of the FN’s attacks and cruelty, than the actual people, adults, who conducted the attacks?

Are we truly regressing as a fandom? The show wouldn’t give them their traumatic experiences and talk about their abusers if they wanted the viewer to antagonize the victims. Goes to show that the loudest voices screaming “irredeemable monster” and “they want people to feel sorry for him” never truly know who these characters are and how they operate, they need everything spoon fed to them which is very unfortunate. The real irredeemable monsters are right there in their face and they choose to look somewhere else.

It’s so obvious how people in this fandom pick and choose who to feel sympathy for, when they all needed it.

[dearest-siblingtwst]

°•Admiring or In Love•°

• Deuce Spade x Reader •

Note: Reader is Gender-neutral and might OOC, Reader was a bit shy / Blunt, bad grammar Chapter 1 & 2 Spoiler!

⊱──────────── • °. °

Name!Rosehearts, you are Riddle's twin who has the opposite character of Riddle, but you also avoid breaking the rules so you don't get Collar cage by your own twins.

°•°.⊱──────────── • °. °

You still remember where you were dragged into a problem by your underclassman.

the moment when you were ordered by the Headmaster to take care of your underclassman and the magic-less student with their familiar.

You still remember where you first looked into the eyes of your underclassman who was higher than you, his gaze that was filled with awe and warm as he stared at you.

the same gaze after he saw you take responsibility for the Unbirthday party Incident just because of Marron tart.

you still remember where he and Ace wanted to fight your twin to take over the dormleader position.

you remember how Deuce tried to protect you when your Twins, Riddle Rosehearts, Overblot.

You still remember Deuce's words when he tried to comfort you who was very worried about Riddle who fainted after the Overblot.

and here you are now, sitting at the unbirthday Party heartslabyul which was held after your twin began to fully recover from his Overblot.

"So what happened to that tart Dorm leader?" Ace asked Riddle the tart that Ace ordered from last week.

"I made it for you, as I promised I would Here: one strawberry tart, crafted by yours truly." Riddle shows the strawberry tart he made, you look at him happily.

"Psst, [Name]." your friend calls you which makes your attention move to them. "Need something?" You raise your eyebrow knowing damn that if your Dormmates calls you there must be some latest gossip.

"Are you not aware of how that underclassman behavior when you are around him?" your Friend ask you with a mocking smile while pointing their finger at Deuce, it makes you turn your head after hearing the sound of shouting "SALTY from your twins group.

seem like that the Tart that Riddle made only have the beautiful decoration but not with the taste, You just sighed at the sight and your Friend laughed but were little annoyed because the question they ask had not been answered.

You were surprised by Deuce who turned his gaze toward you, but look like he realized he just made eye contact with you and looked the other way with a tint blush.

it makes you a little confused but ignore it, But you notice that some sweets on your table are missing.

"Magical shift tournament? yes I've been practicing so no need to worry!" you said answering your another classmate's question.

"I'm just making sure you're ready to compete in the tournament!" your classmate from Diasomnia puffed his chest with a pride making sure everyone knows you're really cool especially when playing in tournaments.

"But be careful. I hear that there have been incidents of many students getting hurt for no reason, especially those who get hurt are Mostly great players in every dorm." one of your classmates who is from Scarabia warns you with concern and you nod in response.

You also heard that from other students gossip, you also have to be more careful, especially your childhood friend, Trey. who broke his ankle by falling down the stairs.

but for a moment, deep down you feel something heavy like you are worrying about something.

You always think about what Deuce is doing now. Is he not a victim of this incident? Is he Practicing well? Is he thinking about you? your mind is filled with your worries about Deuce making you just quiet and making your two classmates look at you full concern.

"[Name], are you okay?" the Scarabia student asked you with worry and fear that something was making you un-energetic than usual.

"uh-? oh i'm fine don't worry, it's just that.. I'm worried about my underclassmen" You waved your hand to sign nothing happened to you.

"Deuce Spade ?" your Diasomnia friend guesses while holding his chin like a detective.

"yes it's him and- wait, how did you know?" You stopped and widened your eyes at your friend in surprise,

"Diasomnia thing fufu, I didn't think you would like your own underclassmen who are even higher than you."

"And more importantly he admires you, wait- the word admiration doesn't really fit, in love! yeah!" exclaimed your Diasomnia friend making your cheeks red and looking at your Scarabia friend to defend you.

Unfortunately your Scarabia friend just stares with a smile as if he's holding back his laughter making you pout.

"Sorry sorry- i'm just messing around, hey don't be angry at me!" Your Diasomnia friend laughs and hugs you so dramatically and makes you just roll your eyes but make you slightly smile.

The Diasomnia and Scarabia Student stopped laughing when they saw your small Grin and just look at each other and smile warmly.

"aww our dear Rosehearts has grown up!" Your Scarabia friend hugs you like a mother hugs her child, making you flustered.

"OI !!"

because the event this afternoon made you just eat your dinner in silence.

you looked at Deuce and saw him chatting with Ace made you stare at him for too long, Deuce, who feels he is being watched, turns to you which surprises you and goes back to seeing your own dinner.

Riddle who saw only raised his eyebrows as if there was something suspicious, while Deuce was just silent and didn't expect that the person staring at him was someone he admired, wait- he doesn't even know if he's just admiring you or more than that.

he realized and just after his shoulder was hit by Ace, Ace mocked him and said that Deuce was looking at [Name] lovingly

making Deuce blush.

..

...

you came into your room after dinner and Immediately threw yourself on the bed, You Think that today is a tiring day.

but you are still thinking, is it true what people say that Deuce is in love with you?

you buried your head in your pillow feeling your head is very dizzy thinking about unimportant things.

maybe Deuce just admires you! Yes, that must be the reason that makes Deuce shy when you're around him!

But still, your heart feels a little cracked if he only admires you as if you want the rumors is actually become reality it feels selfish but you still expect that, but why?

You are really confused with your own feelings, do you actually consider him your dearest underclassmen or not?

Why did you just realize this feeling is the reason that makes you feel something strange?

feeling your brain getting dizzy with so many thoughts stuck in your head, you close your eyes hoping all the bad thoughts are gone.

You start to wake up early morning,

you realize that you are wearing a blanket even though last night you didn't wear anything to keep you warm, could it be Riddle? Your dearest twins?

You don't really care about it because you still feel your head is very dizzy and even your forehead feels hot.

Wow, it turns out that a lot of stress will make you sick. You are not sure if you can survive if you go to class without breakfast?

Well let's try:D

........ ........ ........🍭

it was a bad decision you chose and now you regret it.

Now you are lying in the infirmary with a broken leg. What? Too fast?

repeat the scene.

—

you walk out of class with your other friends, all the way you just hold your stomach in pain from hunger.

your pomefiore friend who saw you miserable offered to help find medicine for a stomach ache. Of course you, who felt suffering, nodded without hesitation because you couldn't stand it anymore.

when you want to go down the stairs you feel your legs move on their own as if someone is moving your body.

You haven't fully thought what going on before your friend screamed your name and your vision started to darken.

—

you are sure that your Diasomnia friend will lecture you and your Scarabia friend will cry hysterically at your condition.

not to mention what Riddle would do when he found out his dearest twin was doing something reckless.

You try to sit up but it only makes the pain in your legs even more pronounced, making you groan painly.

you hear the sound of the door opening making you turn your head and see the figure of Deuce entering the infirmary room carrying a plastic bag.

"[Name]-senpai, you awake!" Deuce beamed at you and walked over to you, he put the plastic he was holding on the table near you and sat beside you.

"Deuce, what brought you here?"

"Of course to visit you! , Dorm leader was very worried when he received news that you had fallen down the stairs and were unconscious from your friends.."

"And also.."

"Also…?"

"We have found the culprit behind all these incidents, it was Ruggie Bucchi." Deuce's answer left you speechless in disbelief that Ruggie was the culprit,

you sighed heavily and wanted to go back to rest but you felt your stomach hurt again because you hadn't eaten yet made you sneer while holding your stomach and Deuce who was surprised and worried stood up to check on you.

"What happened!?" deuce asked while looking at you with panic on his face.

"I forgot that I haven't eaten since morning-" your answer makes Deuce immediately take something out of the plastic which you assume is a piece of cake that Trey made.

"luckily Trey-Senpai prepared a cake which didn't contain fruits" Deuce cuts the cake with a plastic fork and reflexively feeds you and you eat the bite too.

That unexpected right made you and Deuce freeze before you both heard a door slam,

you see your Scarabia friend who looks very worried and panicked with your Diasomnia friend, you also see Trey, Riddle and also Ace behind them.

"DEAREST, I JUST GOT A MESSAGE FROM YOUR CLASSMATE THAT YOU FALL FROM STAIRS AND—" they all fell silent seeing the position of Deuce who was still feeding you.

Deuce and you burning up with embarrassment while Trey and your Diasomnia friends stare at the both of you with an amused smile.

"looks like they need some time alone" your Diasomnia friend chuckled and pulled your Scarabia friend who was still in shock and was followed by Ace, and Trey

Riddle glanced at you briefly and then followed the others.

"I'm sorry about that- um.." you look at Deuce with worried fear he feels uncomfortable but what you get is Deuce looking at you with a sheepish smile.

"Ah no, I should be the one who apologizes.. I'm feeding you without your- permission?" you stare at him but start to smile a little, feeling cute seeing him like that.

"I mean, I do not mind really, I even loves you feeding me! E- " You stare at Deuce embarrassed while Deuce can't say anything before you both laugh together.

"[Name] really take my word seriously" said your Diasomnia friend looking at Riddle who was pressing his temple while Ace and Trey just sweat drops seeing your Scarabia friend crying ugly.

[thatfeyboy]

Hey quick question why does saying things like "men have issues" or "androphobia exists" are treated as saying "I hate women and misogyny doesn't exist" when they are the most vanilla nothing statements known to our species?

It's becoming bizarre. And I know, people are traumatized, bad people exist on the right, those words or phrases are used by MRAs/incels, etc., but in the end that's not really important. It doesn't matter what word or phrase is used here, because no matter what it is it still only superficially represents the problem. The issue is some of you have connected men(all men or those assumed to be a man/male-like by someone) having genuine worries, feelings, concerns, or a desire for their own voice, as an attempt to oppression women.

This is not to say all men to everyone(despite the haha funny jokes about That). What people's threshold for "true, privileged man" is different. Some might include queer men, some might not. Some may or may not include minority men, or trans men, or what have you. But at the end of the day anyone who can be put under this label, if convenient enough, will at some point be belittled or silenced because of that. Trans women are definitely included in this, because a significant reason people are horrible to them is because they are perceived as gnc men or too "male-like"/"male-socialized"I (they are not men, and do also often experience misogyny, transmisogyny, and transphobia) . This is not a topic up for debate. It is a fact. This is a standard experience for most men/people perceived to be men.

At the end of the day it's the same rhetoric any bigot or regressive uses. They dehumanize and make a monster of the target in order to help stifle negative feelings about mocking and ignoring them. Over time this segregation of ideas and community leads to in/out group thought and eventually actual militant hatred. There is, without doubt, militant hatred of men on this site and beyond because it is seen as justified. Those most affected by this belief are men who are already vulnerable(trans/gnc/racial minority/disabled/gay/etc).

If you are at the point were, actually literally for real, you think hating or degrading men(as a type of person) is ok and moral(no matter your reason), you need to realize you are in fact projecting. There is simply no way around it. Most people who are left wing and decently civil would be horrified if you publicly discussed your feelings in totality, because you are exactly the kind of monster you pretend to protect others from. That's not to say you haven't been hurt or victimized, but if you continue to do it to others you will be seen as the problem because you are actively choosing to hurt people

[where-theres-smoak-2]

I've been thinking about the driftmark episode again, there is so much debate and argument over who was at fault and who the 'bad guys' where in both the fight between the children and in the following chaos in the hall after, here's how I see it.

When it comes to the fight between the children there is a lot of discourse, on one hand you have people arguing that well Aemond was the victim because it was four against one, Rhaena struck the first blow and because in the end he lost an eye which was a permanent and traumatic injury. One the other side you have people argue that actually Jace, Luke, Rhaena and Baela were the victims because Aemond stole their mother's dragon at her funeral, he threatened to kill them both verbally and then literally when he tried to bash Jace's head in with a rock and that Luke was only acting out of self defence. The thing is, every one of these statements is true. I don't think this fight was ever supposed to be about which child was in the right and which was in the wrong, it was a fight between children that got out of hand. It was a storm of events that lead to Aemond tragically losing his eye.

Aemond claimed Vhagar, Laena's dragon at her own funeral, there is no denying that this was a disrespectful and shitty thing to do. I am also not sure what the legalities around it were. I've seen some say that dragon's are a free for all once their previous rider is dead but I still think it is considered disrespectful to do it, especially without the family's permission/ blessing. It reminds me of when Daemon stole the egg that was meant for Baelon. Both Viserys and Rhaenyra were very upset by the action and this was six months after Baelon died, it was disrespectful even though the egg was obviously no longer going to be used by Baelon who was gone, its why Daemon took that specific egg because he knew it would anger his brother enough to get his attention. And this was just an egg so I can see why Laena's daughter's would be so upset when a living, breathing dragon that had belonged to their mother was claimed by someone else so soon after her death. It's also worth noting that when Rhaena says Vhagar was hers to claim, Aemond doesn't deny that, he doesn't say well anyone can claim a dragon or you don't have an exclusive right to Vhagar, he says that she should have claimed her then. Which to me suggests that maybe there is some custom where family members have a right to first claim so to speak. Anyway I feel like I've gone on a tangent here but it was wrong and very insensitive of Aemond to claim Vhagar the way he did.

Then that leads to the situation where the girls, who are now upset about Vhagar and their mother's death, confront Aemond, who is very likely on a high after claiming and riding Vhagar, and he responds very coldly, callously telling them their mother is dead and saying they should get Rhaena a pig to ride, which in turn angers Rhaena and so she throws the first hit in anger. There is one thing I do want to address though about this moment. I see a lot of people talk about how Aemond was desperate for a dragon, he was mocked for not having one and had self worth issues and felt left out because he didn't have a dragon when his sibling and cousin's did. But you know who else had self worth issues and felt left out because they didn't have a dragon? Rhaena. It does confuse me how everyone will try and justify Aemond claiming Vhagar because of his want to have a dragon and his issues around not having one and will villainise Rhaena for throwing the first punch, but will look over the fact that Rhaena herself has the same issues around not having a dragon. It was obvious that she herself was planning on claiming Vhagar, just stop and think for a moment what that would've meant to Rhaena, not only would she have gained a dragon but it would have been a way for her to honour her mother's memory, to be the rider of the largest and oldest dragon in the world, just like her mother. Only all her dreams are crushed because on the eve of her mother's funeral someone else claims Vhagar before she gets the chance. I understand Aemond's motives behind claiming Vhagar, but I also understand why Rhaena (and Baela) were so angry and hurt by Aemond's actions, especially when his response to their confrontation was to further antagonise them.

When it comes to the other kids, Baela, Jace and Luke, they all only attack Aemond in defence of each other. Baela hits Aemond in defence of Rhaena when Aemond throws her aside, Jace hits Aemond when he hits Baela and then Luke jumps in after Aemond hits Jace. I'm not saying that their actions were right, just to be clear, but they are understandable, of course you are going to jump in and retaliate when you see your younger sibling or your cousin get hurt.

Talking about the whole four on one thing though, I do have some thoughts on this too. One is that I do think this is kind of a mirror for team black vs team green. What I mean by that is, in my opinion team black are much more united than team green who seem to have a distance between them, I might make a more in depth post about the contrast between the two sides at some point. But that's not to say that team black don't have issues and disagreements or that team green don't have love for each other, more that the way they are presented, team green seem much more at odds with each other. Aemond in this moment is standing alone, he doesn't have any one at his side helping to protect him like the other four do. He's alone because he snuck out to claim a dragon in an attempt to prove himself after being bullied for not having one, a bullying that was instigated by his older brother. On the opposite side of this you have Jace, Luke, Baela and Rhaena who all banded together to go look for the dragon thief, they are one unit and they are all looking out for and fighting for each other. The stark contrast between the two sides actually does make me have alot of sympathy for Aemond.

However another thing to point out is that despite it being four on one it is very clear that it is an uneven match in Aemond's favour. He is able to overpower all of them relatively easy and quickly gets the upper hand over them so that they are the ones in a position of danger. I mentioned this in another post but what I did find a bit disturbing on a rewatch is that when Aemond is standing over Jace with the rock, ready to smack him with it, he has this smirk on his face and is clearly enjoying the fear he is instilling in the others, he is enjoying the violence of it all. I also said that I mostly blame Cole for this behaviour along with Aegon's enjoyment for watching children fight. I really do believe that Cole fed this enjoyment for violence to them through his training sessions.

Luke slashing out at Aemond and taking his eye was very clearly self defence, or rather an attempt to stop Aemond from killing Jace. I have seen some argue that well the rock wouldn't have killed Jace, which again really confuses me because an episode earlier Daemon used a rock to kill Rhea, so obviously, yes a rock would kill a person, and yes Jace was in very real danger. Also whether the rock would actually have killed Jace or not (it would have) the important thing is that Luke and the others believed Aemond was going to kill Jace, and we know they truly believed Jace's life was in danger because when they were all yelling at each other trying to explain what happened you can hear one of them shout 'he tried to kill jace.'

As I said above what this fight ultimately was about was the consequences of the adults fuelling this feud between the children, how their own rivalry was trickling down into their children who were too young to fully understand what the conflict was truly about. The adults are the real culprits here. Not only for not watching the children closely enough but for creating such a toxic environment around them. The important thing to me is that Luke did not act out of true maliciousness or hate, he acted out of defence for his brother when he feared for his brother's life. I also don't think that it was Luke's intention to maim Aemond, again he was a very young boy who just wanted to protect his brother. I've seen so many people say, well Luke didn't even apologise for maiming Aemond and yeah he didn't, but I don't recall Aemond ever apologising to Rhaena and Baela for claiming their mother's dragon at her funeral, or to Jace and Luke for attempting to you know murder them with a rock, either. Unfortunately this fight could have been avoided if the adults in these kid's lives one, hadn't encouraged the feud between the children in the first place and two had actually been keeping a closer eye on them, the result is that Aemond has to live with this injury for the rest of his life and it only made tensions between the children even worse.

But now let's talk about the aftermath in the hall. Honestly, whilst I am not Alicent's biggest fan, I did understand her frustration and anger in this moment. Like I cannot imagine what it must be like for a mother to learn that her son has gotten into a fight with his nephews and has now lost an eye, for her to see her son in pain and that stitching across his eye, she had my sympathy and I can understand why she lost it. That being said, her demanding Luke's eye in return was insane, that was made clear by the way the entire room gasped when she suggested it.

I also understand why Alicent felt frustrated that Luke wasn't punished for it, though to be clear I agree that Luke shouldn't be punished for what was essentially an accident. But also there is a very good reason why Viserys didn't punish Luke besides that it was an accident. I feel like Viserys gets alot of stick from the fandom for not acting in this instance but I also think the reason why he doesn't act is overlooked. If Viserys punishes Luke then he also has to punish a whole lot of other people too. He'd have to punish all of the children for striking each other, Rhaena, Baela, Luke and Jace all struck a royal prince, but so too did Aemond, Jace is heir to the throne so it was against the law for Aemond to strike him and it was definitely against the law for him to attempt to strike him across the head with a rock. So that's all four children that would need to be punished to varying degrees. On top of that, Jace and Rhaenyra announce to the hall that Aemond called Jace and Luke bastards, which truth or no, Rhaenyra is right, to make an accusation like that could be considered treason. It is obvious again from the reaction of those in the hall, including Alicent's own, how bad this is. Aemond then throws Aegon under the bus to protect his mother so that means Viserys would also have to punish both Aegon and Aemond for at best spreading slander and at worst literal treason. So punishing Luke like Alicent wants could lead to Rhaenyra demanding that Aegon and Aemond also be punished for spreading the rumors about her sons, and Viserys wouldn't be able to punish one without the other because that would just cause more discord and anger. After Alicent then decides to take matters into her own hands and try to take Luke's eye herself, well we're just adding to the crimes to be punished, because now Alicent has disobeyed a direct order from the King, stolen a weapon, tried to maim the grandchild of the king and in doing so proceeded to injure the heir to the throne. Like maybe its just me, but surely people can see how impossible this situation is. Asking Viserys to act is asking him to severely punish two of his grandsons, two of his nieces, two of his sons and his wife. Not to mention that punishing Luke, Jace, Rhaena and Baela would likely anger Corlys and Rhaenys which we've already been there, done that, and realised the consequences suck. Punishing his own sons would likely anger the Hightowers, again not a good idea. So lets all be honest with ourselves here, Viserys response of would you all just stop fighting and make good will with each other was the best option for everyone involved, it was the only option really.

Like I said above I really and genuinely do feel for Alicent in this moment, for Aemond, for Jace, Luke, Rhaena and Baela, for Rhaenyra who people seem to forget also was fearful for her children, and also for Viserys who was having to deal with all this family drama where there really wasn't any reasonable solution other than commanding them to all get along. Basically this situation sucked for everyone that was involved.