#i know a lot of people cant exactly see them in a good light because of what he did to real Mitsuba but i dont really relate the two much | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fictionalmenmistress · 1 month

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I haven't seen anyone else talk about it, so I wanted to share that Logan's rant monologue insulting Wade in the Honda Odyssey, before Wade decides to beat him up and they ~fight~ all night... that so clearly to me, was Logan projecting. It started as a tempered rant to cope with how annoyed and pent up he was, with the heat of everything and with Wade's muchness that makes him, him, but the longer he went on, the more he started ranting and exposing himself in the process.

"THE XMEN REJECTED YOU, AND THEY'LL TAKE FUCKING ANYONE!!!" That was my first hit, that he was referring to himself. He sees himself so lowly, so failed, that's canonical to the film. And canonically, he didn't even quite originally feel worthy or want to be with the XMEN. Didn't feel like there was a place for him there, a place for him anywhere. One of his biggest healings was Professor X not giving up on helping him believe that he deserved to be there, was wanted, was worthy, was a good guy. That's canon to his character. So we know he was speaking about himself. He was chewing Wade out, but he was also talking and focusing moreso on what upset him about himself. (He sees himself as just any jo shmo, when he IS literally THE X MAN ㅠㅠ)

He was seeing himself in Wade, how he "can't even save a relationship with a gd stripper", (he sees himself as not able to save anything either, and he's angry for that more than anything else he's angry or annoyed at) projecting SO HARD as he pieced together saying it out loud, that Wade was exactly like him. Logan hated himself for not saving anything. For being a "loser", a "failure", for all of the same reasons he was lashing out at Wade for. He was so angry and annoyed by Wade reminding him of himself, because he related to him. Wade was his reflection, in his eyes, calling him out so loudly with his own behaviors. And he hated himself. He deeply was suffering with that hatred for himself, and as a result, he lashed out on Wade when really he was chewing out himself, inside, admitting it.

"God's CRUELEST JOKE, IS THAT YOU *WONT* DIE ALONE. BECAUSE YOU! CANT! DIE! SO THE REST OF US HAVE TO SUFFER YOU THE REST OF OUR EXISTENCE!" (something along that.)

He didn't know for sure that Wade can't die. He picked up on that Wade can't be killed. Logan is the one who can't die. They are two flipped sides of the same immortal power coin. When he finished his screaming at him, and everyone was silent at how cruel and shocking the confrontation and his words were, I was sinking with a very empathetically whispered "oh, Logan..." Because I felt his misery. I immediately picked up on him really talking about himself, and I think that was genius and layered. I was upset for how awful that was to say to Wade, heartbroken for Wade taking that to heart, and I was heartbroken that Logan was saying that because he believes that about himself. Because they are, oddly, a lot alike. Very compatible.

This scene here:

I read that Hugh said that Ryan wrote that. He's brilliant with these films. It was so genius. I really needed to share this and bring this thought, meta, analysis to light. For all of us to have.

Is Logan mad at God's "cruel joke" of his immortality, yet ability to feel so much pain through it still? Yes. He punched the roof in rage, because it's not fair. Venting his own pain. He sees his powers, his own and Wade's too, empathetically, as their curse. The curse of being the one who lives, and the guilt with that. The one who can't die. The one who lives, who is forced to live, while everyone who "deserves to live" dies. And WILL die, around them.

"And You can't die. That's on all of US!" Logan says, clearly referring to himself living forever... And "us" being the people HE loved. He saw himself as a burden for existing with them, for them. He deflected that onto Wade, as if the people in Wade's life must feel that way too, but didn't really mean that. He meant it about himself. Logan believes he was a burden on the people he loves, the people he lost. That's probably why he left too, and didn't come back when they called out for him to. He distanced himself to protect them, and protect himself from that fear of rejection that he feels is so imminent, and them not having him, is the one element that led to none of them surviving without him. He was always the key. He was always wanted, and he was always important and needed. He just couldn't ever believe that.

Man, that's why it became so personal for Logan too, when he was shown Wade's photograph of his family. Because HE had a family, and he would do anything now to save them. Just like Wade. He held that photograph all night, he went and got it when it fell out of the car, he kept looking at it. It became personal for him, when he identified with it. That Honda scene really was their turning point of everything. That's when Logan cared with everything. He got it. Wade is the him he couldn't be. But now he can.

I dropped some heat with this one.

Extra little personal context/thought notes: Maybe I just spotted it because I have a natural knack for psychology, I'm hyperobservant, highly empathetic and deeply feeling, and I'm also years experienced of my parents and whole family treating me the same exact toxic lashout way almost every other day. That's a workweek for me to see through toxic lashout anger BS. These are not my gifs!!! They were created by another amazing account. I will refind their @ and tag them!! >>> It's @landoslastnerve ! Thank you friend! 🤍

Also wanted to include someone's tags from those gifs:

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nadvs · 6 months

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watch and learn (part two)

pairing fratboy! rafe cameron x female reader

rating explicit 18+

content warning drug and alcohol use

summary it takes one conversation with your college dorm neighbor to know you won’t get along. rafe is loud, rude, and short-tempered. after he overhears you talking about a disappointing fling, he loses his confidence in his sexual abilities and suggests you start hooking up to both improve your skills in the bedroom. you can’t stand him, but it’s too good of an offer to turn down.

» masterlist

*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*━━━*+:★:+*

You’re at the library the next morning, enjoying how quiet campus is on a Saturday. You’re trying to focus on a discussion board you need to respond in, but your mind is elsewhere.

You can’t believe you agreed to Rafe’s idea. But you don’t regret it. He may be a jerk through and through, but he’s surprisingly a really good listener in bed.

You’re pretty sure he gave you the best orgasm you’ve ever had with someone. While it was an awkward challenge guiding him, you realized how liberating it was getting exactly what you wanted instead of quietly hoping the guy you were with knew what to do.

Your phone buzzes and lights up with a text. It’s 9:44 am and the notification is from Rafe.

Rafe: if you ever want practice sucking dick let me know

You flush and instinctually look around to make sure nobody in the barren library can see your screen. You reply: good morning to you too.

You take a second and send another message. The thought of going down on him rouses you. And, of course, the feedback will be helpful.

You: might take you up on that

Rafe: might?

You: might :)

Rafe is lying in bed, nursing a minor hangover. When he thinks about what happened on the other side of the wall in your room last night, he gets turned on all over again.

Feeling you cum around his fingers was fucking amazing. Knowing he did that to you, made you shake like that, was like an achievement. And he wants to keep doing it.

He texts you: we’re having a party on the beach today. bring friends

Rafe’s brand new to the frat, but he has already learned how important it is to invite as many people as he can to events. And if he’s being honest, he really wants to see you again.

You: only if you dont hit on them. i cant subject them to that

He feels his lips quirk up in a smile. When you don’t have a stick up your ass, you’re actually kind of entertaining.

Rafe: wtf why

You: you’re a fuckboy

Rafe: nahh you said i was amazing

You: i said the sex was amazing. and thats only because i told you what to do

Rafe: you can’t take all the credit

You: watch me

Rafe: you’re annoying

You: YOU’RE annoying

You: send me the address and time for the party

He quickly sends you the details.

This is the best idea he’s ever had. No strings attached sex with a hot girl who has zero interest in a relationship and can be brutally honest with him. He gets to fuck and improve his skills. It’s a dream.

Later that afternoon, Rafe watches the setting sun as he hangs out with a couple of his frat brothers in the sand. The party’s slowly starting to fill up, conversations growing in volume over the sound of the waves crashing on the shore.

“We don’t host a lot of parties here,” Blake continues to explain to Rafe.

Blake’s a sophomore legacy and Rafe has slowly realized that he sort of looks up to him. He’s involved in the frat and seems to know everybody.

“It’s ‘cause it’s impossible to get people to pay cover, so we don’t even ask for it,” Blake says.

“No door to do it at,” Sam, another sophomore adds with a laugh. Blake looks back and shakes his head.

“Fun police is here,” he hollers. Rafe turns to see pacing towards the keg next to the same girl he saw you with last night.

His pulse quickens as he takes you in. Your shorts are barely covering anything. Damn.

You glare at Blake as you pick up a red solo cup.

“Kidding,” Blake says. “We were kinda being assholes the other night, weren’t we?”

Your lips twist into a small smile. Rafe isn’t sure why, but he doesn’t like you looking at Blake like that.

He didn’t mention to anyone that you two hooked up last night. No particular reason - it just didn’t come up. But clearly, he’ll have to fill the guys in later. They need to know you’re off limits.

“Thanks for admitting it,” you say, filling up your cup. “Why can’t you be my neighbor?”

You look over at Rafe, whose jaw is clenched. Him and that temper. Admittedly, you’re already kind of sexually frustrated over how good he looks in his tank top, his big biceps exposed.

“Life’s unfair,” Blake replies with a bigger grin. You return it. It makes Rafe’s blood run hot.

“I guess it is,” you say as your friend finishes filling up her cup.

You walk away and Rafe realizes he didn’t exchange a single word with you. The second you’re out of earshot, he leans towards his buddies.

“I’m hooking up with her,” he tells them.

“Your neighbor?” Sam laughs. “Cap. That chick hates you.”

Rafe almost tells him not to call you a chick because of your advice last night. Wow. He really is learning from you.

“Didn’t hate me last night.” He takes a sip of his beer.

“Wait, for real?” Blake asks.

“Yeah.” Rafe loves the confidence high he’s riding right now.

“How was it?” Blake asks.

Rafe decides to lie. Painting it as a boring experience will make his buddies lose any interest they might have in you.

“Fine,” he says casually. Yeah, right. It was incredible.

Rafe watches Blake turn, surely to check you out.

“She’s cute,” Blake mumbles.

“Bro code, man,” Sam says, slapping his friend’s chest. Rafe is kind of relieved he said that.

“Shit, my bad,” Blake says with a chuckle, looking at Rafe. “You like her?”

“Oh - no,” Rafe laughs. “No.”

“Then you wouldn’t mind if I talked to her, right?” Blake says it as more of a statement than a question.

Rafe realizes he shouldn’t care. This whole arrangement is so both of you can get better at sex with other people. He doesn’t know what got into him thinking you owed him loyalty. His impulse to be possessive serves no purpose here.

“Go for it,” Rafe says.

Dusk falls as you stand in a crowd with Liv, your feet sunken into the sand as you drink and chat.

You told her about your arrangement with Rafe and were surprised to hear how jealous she was, mentioning how rare it is to find a guy who cares about giving his girl an orgasm.

You had to clarify to her it’s because Rafe’s ego needs all the stroking it can get, especially in the bedroom. And that you are not his girl.

You know it’s a crazy situation to be in with someone, but it’s worth it. You’ll learn what you can from him, and he’ll do the same with you, and then you’ll use what you picked up with people you actually like.

As the night goes on, the crowd gets bigger and closer together. It’s dark at this point, the moon covered with clouds.

Rafe’s been looking at you all night, at your bare legs, thinking about how he had his mouth between them last night.

You feel your phone buzz in your back pocket. When you pull it out, you see a text from Rafe: you ever fucked in a car? or are you too scared lol

You look up to meet his gaze from eight feet away at most, shaking your head in incredulity as he smirks at you.

The abruptness of his message, the promise of doing something so outside your comfort zone, is thrilling. But still, you just have to mess with him.

You reply: too scared :( no thanks

You laugh at the way Rafe’s face contorts at his phone. He looks up at you.

You text again: jk let’s go

He flashes his middle finger to you and you return the gesture. He then cocks his head behind him to signal you to follow.

“Tip for you,” you say when you approach him, walking away from the crowd together. “Don’t flip off a girl you’re trying to fuck.”

“Is that not good foreplay?” Rafe asks with a smirk.

“Aw, did I teach you that word?” you say.

“I knew it before.”

“Sure,” you say. “Just like you knew that girls fake it.”

“You’re annoying,” he groans, amusement in his tone.

“You’re annoying” you say, echoing your text conversation from earlier. You playfully shove his shoulder. He hardly budges.

You approach the parking lot and Rafe pulls out keys to remotely unlock his car.

“Get in,” he says, stopping in front of a large black SUV and opening the right backseat door. You notice the luxury brand immediately.

“This is your car?”

“Got a motorcycle, too,” he replies smugly.

“It makes so much sense now.”

“What?”

“You’re rich,” you realize. Rafe shrugs in such a pompous way.

“And?”

“That’s why you’re so…” you begin. What’s the right word? Entitled? Arrogant? Shameless? “You.”

Rafe scoffs at you, unsure of how to take the comment and unsure if he should even care as you settle in his car. He ambles in behind you, settling on the leather seat and shutting the door.

You don’t feel shy to initiate like you did last night. You straddle him, immediately locking lips, feeling him freeze in what you think is surprise before his hands drag over your hips.

Rafe really wants to grab your ass but he remembers you telling him he shouldn’t jump right to groping.

He tastes like beer and he smells like cologne as you deepen the kiss, weaving your lips together. He dips his tongue into your mouth and your noses nudge together, wet lips smacking in his dark, quiet car.

He shuffles under you, the leather squeaking, allowing you to feel his hard-on between your legs, his hands finally wandering over your ass and gripping hard. Lust burns in your stomach.

Your mind drifts back to what he texted you this morning. You’ve been thinking about it all day. You sit back, unable to see much of Rafe in the darkness, but enough to see that his eyes are half-closed, drunk off the feeling.

“I wanna practice…” you say, stroking him over his shorts. “You know.”

“Say it,” Rafe coaches, his dimples caving into his cheeks. You roll your eyes. Right. This is why you’re doing this. To stop being so reserved.

“Sucking dick,” you finally say. Hearing and watching you as your words spill out of your mouth makes his skin prickle with excitement.

“My turn to teach you, huh?” Rafe’s voice is deep and husky, dripping with desire. You nod, your bottom lip trapped beneath your teeth as you continue to stroke him.

“Should I keep doing this?” you ask, palming him.

“You got it, baby,” he rasps lazily. “Touch it before you put it in your mouth.”

“Fuck,” you half-chuckle. Rafe smirks. He knows you love his dirty talk.

“You can talk, too,” he encourages. “Try it.”

You twist your lips in apprehension, but push yourself past your comfort zone.

“I’ve been thinking about doing this all day,” you admit, goosebumps blooming across your skin. “About how your cock is gonna feel down my throat.”

“Goddamn,” he groans, his hands gripping your ass tighter. How’d he get so lucky to be here right now? “That’s good.”

“Yeah?” you whisper, gratified. You unbutton his shorts and pull down his zipper.

“You liked the way it felt inside you last night, didn’t you?” he asks. He shifts to give you the space to pull down his shorts and boxers.

You watch him shut his eyes in pleasure as you wrap your bare hand around him, no fabric in the way anymore.

“I loved it,” you whisper, giving into the impulse to kiss him again. When your thumb rubs over the bead of warm precum on the head of his cock, he bites your bottom lip.

You move to position your head at his groin, your knees on the carpeted floor of his car. You lean forward, slowly putting your lips around the tip, feeling just how wet your panties are when you taste him.

“Shit,” he shudders. You slightly raise your head to dribble spit onto his thick cock, bringing your hand up to rub the moisture over his length.

“Sit up,” Rafe says. “I wanna watch you spit on it again.”

You straighten and the sight of your line of saliva dropping from your mouth to his dick makes Rafe feel like he might go crazy.

His cock is slick now, your hand sliding up and down it easily.

“Should I use both hands?” you ask.

“Yeah,” he huffs. You nod, both your palms rubbing over his girth, cupping and twisting.

He’s about to tell you to start using your mouth, but you drop a hand, leaving the other at his base, and take him in.

Your hot, wet mouth feels unbelievable. You start to suck and slide over him nicely, leaning up and down.

“Squeeze harder,” he instructs, and you nod with his cock still in your mouth, your hold stiffening at his base. You’d assume gripping this tight would hurt, but this is why you’re doing this with him. To learn.

You take a little more of him with every dip of your head, lips locked as spit dribbles down your chin. The sound of your slurping is fucking amazing to him. Your tongue twists and curls as you move.

“Keep using your tongue like that,” Rafe says to you, his words whispered and rushed. “And take as much of my cock as you can. Try to take all of it.”

You nod again, pushing down, gagging but reaching all of him, your nose touching his toned stomach.

“Fuck, yes,” he moans. “Good fucking girl.”

The praise makes you stir with enticement as you pull back, then take all of his length again, flicking your tongue.

“Just like that,” Rafe grunts, his voice hoarse. “Look at me.”

You meet his eyes in the shadowed car, his chest heaving. Rafe might just lose his mind at the way you look with your mouth stuffed with his cock. He reminds himself this is supposed to be instructional.

“Guys love this shit, okay?” he says. “When you look up like that.”

You pull back, making him watch his cock slowly get uncovered as you pop off of him.

“Is it wet enough?” you ask.

“Yeah, baby, you’re doing a good job,” he replies. You nod and sink onto him again, starting to move faster, moving your hand in sync with your mouth.

“Hold my balls,” he tells you. “Not too tight.”

You obey, cupping the soft flesh with one hand while the other remains wrapped around his cock. You squeeze gently, massaging his balls and earning a deep groan from him.

Wow. You really are learning a lot from him.

Rafe feels his stomach tighten. He’s close.

“You gonna swallow?” he asks.

“Yeah,” you say, muffled and vibrating over his cock. You never have before, but you really want to impress Rafe and do this right.

He starts to shake, his voice reduced to a whimper. You feel him get even harder, then shudder.

His hot cum hits the back of your throat in one hard splash, trailed by short spurts. He moans his way through his orgasm, his load heavy.

You take it all, making him smile as he looks down at you, panting.

“That was… fuck…” Rafe huffs, titling his head back, his jawline sharp.

It’s pretty gratifying seeing such a big, loud, arrogant man reduced to this tired, heaving mess. He rakes a hand through his hair as you shift to sit next to him.

“A-plus?” you ask. You’re expecting him to tease you but he nods.

“Fuck yeah,” he laughs. “Give me a few minutes. I want you to show me how to make you cum on my dick.”

Nerves suddenly bubble in your stomach. Even after what you just did, the thought of fucking him in here makes you feel on edge.

“Let’s do that another night,” you say, adjusting your top.

“What? Why?” he asks. He looks at you, lips still parted as he breathes heavily.

“We could get caught.”

“The windows are tinted,” Rafe tells you. “Nobody knows we’re even in here.”

You look away, which by now, he has learned means you’re embarrassed.

“Holy shit, why do you get so nervous all of a sudden?” he laughs. “Do you feel bad for liking sex or something?”

You swallow hard. You never thought about it but... maybe he’s right. There always is a little bit of shame attached to every hook-up you have.

He called you out on your lack of confidence last night. Here he is, doing it again.

Rafe doesn’t understand how a girl can be so sure of herself one minute, then ashamed the next.

“Relax,” he says. “Don’t think. Just answer, understand?”

“Okay,” you say.

“Do you want to fuck?”

You nod.

“Say it.”

“Yeah, I do,” you relent.

“Then take your clothes off.”

(part three)

if you want notifications on when i post my fics, follow @xorafe-library and turn on notifications 💘

#the way i listen to a playlist called ‘fratboy anthems’ while i work on this series….#don’t think i’ve ever written this much this fast??? what rafe cameron does to a mf #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron #rafe x reader #rafe obx #rafe outer banks #obx smut #rafe cameron fic #rafe x y/n #rafe x you #rafe cameron and you #rafe cameron and reader #rafe cameron and y/n

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cmncisspnandmore · 10 months

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One Night Stand; Part 3

Pairings: Simon 'Ghost' Riley X Reader

Warnings: OOC Simon (kinda?), fluff, alcohol, pregancy, talks of abortion, vomiting,

Summary: Its been 3 months since your night in the sheets with Simon and your life just got a whole lot more complicated.

A/N: I know, I know. okay. I get it. Not everyone like the pregnancy trope, so if you dont im sorry. If i lose some readers for this then im sad to see you go but i hope to see you in future writings i do for the COD men. This is not going to be like other pregnancy tropes that get all mushy and fluffy and light after. This story will be filled with dark themes coming in later chapters that i hope will keep people interseted. We all know Simon Riley's life cant be easy, so if you're still here after this part. Buckle up. Its a wild ride.

Word Count: 5,015

New to the Series? Catch up here: Part 1, Part 2

The bar looked exactly the same as it did three months ago. The music wasn't as loud, but that was probably because it was still early. Many people were still at work at 5pm on a Thursday.

Not you, you had found a job working online, writing articles for business pages. It wasn't the most exciting thing in the world but it paid well, and it occupied most of your time. An added bonus of not leaving for work was you never had to worry about coming home from the office to find someone on your couch. You shake your head trying to clear the thoughts. You weren't even 100% sure why you were here, the chances that Soap even knew Simon were slim. But he had said he knew almost everyone that came to the bar.

So there was a chance.

One you couldn't pass up, you had to at least try.

Wrapping your coat around you tighter, you walk into the bar. The dim lights reflect off the shiny tables. A few people sit at them, watching a replay of a game on tv. You glance around behind the bar, looking for the familiar mohawk.

It pops up from behind the bar towards the end, Soap holds a bin of limes in his arms. He sets the bin down on the shiny black countertop, pulling a small cutting board out from the top of the bin and a knife. He slices a lime in half as you slide into the seat in front of him. His blue eyes meet yours and a smile breaks out on his face.

“Lass! Good to see ya, you disappeared on me the last time ye were here!” He smiles, turning the lime and cutting it again.

“Sorry about that, I needed to clear my head, I hope I didn't upset you,” you smile back, placing your hands on the bar.

“Nay, what can I get for ye? Vodka Soda?” he asks, setting the knife down as he turns towards the shelves of alcohol behind him.

“Uh, actually, can I just have water instead?” You bite your bottom lip and Soap nods, grabbing a glass and filling it. He slides the glass of water in front of you, and you stare down into it.

“Everything okay?” he asks, looking at you with one raised eyebrow.

“Oh yeah, I'm fine. Early day tomorrow ya know? Don't want to be hung over is all.”

“Aye i get that, so what brings you here?” Soap leans his forearms against the bar, “Miss me?” He smiles.

You can't help but roll your eyes, “Oh totally,” you laugh.

“I knew it, not many women can resist the MacTavish charm,” Soap grins, he stands back up and picks up the knife. He cuts each lime into wedges before putting them in the bin, you reach over grabbing one from the cutting board and squeeze it into your water.

“Aye! Paw off,” Soap smiles, shaking the knife at you. A smile of your own breaks out on your lips as you watch him.

“You have plenty to spare, plus someone around here has to keep you busy.”

“I assure you Lass, the folk around here keep me plenty busy,” Soap points over your shoulder where Price and Gaz are walking in. They’re deep in a conversation as they make their way over to where you are sitting in front of Soap.

Kyle is the first to notice you, and he pauses looking at you over. “Y/n, it's good to see you again, not going to lie. I was kinda sad you left without a goodbye last time,” Gaz takes the seat on the left.

“Sorry about that, I promise to say bye this time. I don’t want to bruise your ego,” You say over the rim of your glass.

“Good, I don't think I can hear him wallow about it anymore,” Price says as he sits in the stool on your right. “So what do you think of London? Everything you could’ve imagined?”

“It’s alright… It rains a lot more than I'm used to, but it's not too bad. Definitely different from the small town I'm from,” you look over at him. He gives you a small smile, and turns towards Soap.

“Soap, we ship out tomorrow morning, be ready at 0600 hours,” Price grunts as Soap puts the last lime into the bin.

“Yes sir,” Soap turns towards the bottles of liquor on the shelf and grabs a bottle of bourbon. He sets it down on the counter with a soft thud, he then grabs two glasses for them, pouring each man two fingers. He slides the glasses across the bar to them, the acidic smell of the bourbon makes your stomach turn. Saliva pools in your mouth as you desperately try to swallow.

“Oh uh, Soap, I wanted to ask if you knew someone actually,” You take a sip of water, your eyes following him as he moves behind the bar. Soaps bright blue eyes look over at you, his brows furrowed together.

“I might,” he smiles. A loud noise from behind you startles you, and a drunken man tumbles into the back of your stool. His drink spilling down your back as he leans against the back of the barstool, the smell of the alcohol hits your nose.

“Oops,” the drunken man mumbles, his breath wafting over your face.

Your stomach rolls, as Price and Gaz help the man up. Gaz and Price half drag him away from you as he continues to mumble about his drink. Gaz says something and pats him on the chest as they pull him to the door. You stand from the chair, the fabric of your coat and shirt now sticking to you. Nausea rolls through you as you try to breathe through your mouth.

“You alright lass? You look a little green,” Soap is now standing in front of you, a clean bar towel in his hands. He gently pats the towel against your soaked shirt and coat trying to soak up some of the liquid that's seeping into your skin.

You can't answer, if you open your mouth you’re sure you’ll throw up so you push past Soap and hurry towards the bathroom. Soap follows behind you, pausing at the door to the women's room. You shove open one of the stall doors and drop to your knees. The cold tiles bite through the fabric of your jeans, as the contents of your stomach is emptied into the porcelain bowl. It takes you several minutes to stop dry heaving, your stomach clenching painfully with each contraction of your abs. When the feeling settles you stand, before rinsing your mouth out with some water from the tap. You grab a paper towel, wiping your hands and mouth.

“You alright in there?” Soap calls through the door, his voice laced with concern.

“Yeah..” you call back, tossing the paper towel into the bin and pulling open the door, “Sorry about that.” You shove your hands into your pockets as you come face to face with Soap. His eyebrows knit together in worry as he looks over you, one hand hovers in the air as if hes going back and forth on if he should touch you or not.

“You su-” he pauses looking over your shoulder, his eyes widened slightly.

“MacTavish, the bar can't run itself…” A familiar voice rumbles, the hair on the back of your neck stands on end. Memories of your night 3 months ago rushes back, that same voice that murmured praise to you as he pounded into you.

You whip around, at the end of the hall stands Simon, his black hoodie pulled up over his head, his mouth and nose covered by a skull print face mask. His brown eyes widen slightly as he sees you. “Y/n…” he whispers.

“You two know each other?” Soap muses from behind me, his hands coming to rest on my shoulder as he walks by. An uncomfortable silence settles over the hallway and Soap slips by, muttering “I’ll leave you two alone…”

Simon takes a few steps towards you, and it seems like he takes up the whole hallway. You look up as he towers over you, his face is unreadable, he lifts a hand, brushing his fingertips across your cheek. It sends electricity skittering across your skin, your breath catches in your throat.

Over the past 3 months you have tried to forget about the man whose brown eyes haunted your dreams. Whose touch caused your mind to go blank. Like someone wiping a harddrive. But there was no forgetting, not anymore. He was here in front of you, sure, you had come to ask Soap if he knew him. But you hadn't expected to run into him tonight. You still had no idea what you were going to say to him. How do you justify just leaving his house at 3am?

“You could've said goodbye, you know… You didn't have to sneak out and call an Uber at 3am..” Simon whispers, and guilt slams into you. He knew you left. He wasn't asleep like you thought…

“I-I..” you stumble over your words, unsure what to say. There wasn't anything you could say really. You knew you should’ve just waited, dealt with the awkward small talk. Maybe even exchange numbers you would never plan on using. But nope.

Instead you fled. Just like you fled after your sister's funeral.

At least you were consistent.

“I’m not upset, I understand.” Simon adds after a moment, his hands shoved deep in his pockets of his hoodie.

“Simon.. I.. I’m sorry.. I’ve been going through a lot. And i didnt .. I couldn't face you after that. Not, not that you did anything wrong. Because you didn't! I mean you were great. I just,” You run a hand through your hair. “God, this is not how I wanted this to go.”

“Breathe. Love, breathe.” Simons hands cup your face and you freeze. “It’s okay, like I said I'm not upset with you,” he lets his hands drop, and you nod.

“I didn't know you knew Soap,” He muses, leaning against the wall. You shuffle your feet, taking a deep breath.

“Yeah… I met him the same night I met you… You know him too, yeah?”

“Soap, Gaz, Price and I all serve together,” Simon rubs the back of his neck with his hand, looking slightly uncomfortable.

“Oh! I don't know how I didn't pick up that you were military,” You bite your lip looking down at his black boots.

“We didn't exactly get to know each other very much that night..” Simon says, and a small blush creeps up your cheeks at the mention of your night together. “So what brings you here tonight?” Simon asks.

The familiar feeling of nausea swirls in your stomach again, you clench your fists, nails biting into your palm. Something you have come to do a lot over the past few months. “I came here to ask about you, actually. I needed to talk to you..” You whisper, and Simon's brows furrow.

“Well you found me.. What did you need to talk about?” He asks, as you chew your bottom lip. Anxiety creeps into your chest, wrapping itself around your lungs like an icy hand. The air rushes from your lungs, your eyes burning with tears.

How the hell could you turn this man's life upside down?

“Hey, hey,” Simon whispers, his large hands clasp your shoulders steadying you. The world feels a million miles away, like you were floating out in space untethered. Everything sounds muffled, and the lights are suddenly too bright in the hallway. You raise your shaky hands, running them through your hair. A large hand guides you down the hall a little until the bitter cold air of winter in London hits you. You gasp, your lungs filling with the cold air, goosebumps break out along your heated skin.

The world slowly comes back into focus, soft murmuring in your ear as large arms wrap around your middle holding you against a solid chest. “Breathe, you’re alright, you’re okay… Just breathe, Love.” Simon murmurs into your ear. Tears fall from your eyes, trails of hot tears stream down your cold cheeks.

“I’m sorry I left that night…” you gasp in between sobs, “and i am so sorry im going to say this…” You whisper the last part. At first you aren't sure Simon heard you but after a moment he turns you around. His arms are still around you as he looks down at you, your teeth starting to chatter from emotion and the wind.

“Whatever you have to say can't be that bad, love. Did you find out you had some like STI or something? Do I need to get tested?” He asks, his brown eyes searching your tear stained face. His hands moving up and down your body in an attempt to warm you up and comfort you at the same time.

You shake your head, if only an STI was the least of your problems. “N-no, i didn't give you anything like that…” you choke out.

Simon watches you as you stand face to face with him in the same alley you met him in 3 months ago. Although this time you’re different, instead of the woman who was caught in her own head. Who was running from demons he couldn't see, trying her best to show the world it couldn't break her. Instead standing in front of him was a woman who was scared, who looked so lost in the world, like she was barely hanging on. He studies you, even as you stand in front of him crying, your entire body shaking. You were still beautiful, and he would be lying if he said he didn't think about you.

You had haunted him every moment since he heard you leave the apartment. When he heard the door click shut it took everything in him not to follow you out. But he didn’t, he laid there staring up at the ceiling until almost 5, before he got up and started making himself some tea. It was then he noticed the note you left your swirling handwriting on the scarp paper wishing him well. He was saddened to see you hadn’t left a way to contact you, but part of him understood. He had offered you a chance to get out of your head for a while. He hadn’t asked you on a date. He DIDN'T date.

The onslaught of disappointment was tough for him to swallow. Simon was never upset when a woman he brought to bed left with no goodbye, and a hasty note. Simon preferred it that way, it was better if the one night stands didn’t stick around but for some reason Simon couldn’t stop thinking about you. About how your curves felt beneath his palms. The silky smooth expanse of your skin. The way your moans stirred something deep in him, or the way your eyes told him more than you ever would.

Now as he looked down at you, standing in the darkened alley way. He knew whatever you wanted to say was about to bring his world crashing down. But instead of the overwhelming feeling to flee, that he normally had when confronting emotional issues like this. Simon wanted to hold you close and tell you that it was okay, that whatever it was you could face it and make it out the other side. During his years of doing interrogations and studying people he had learnt the signs of when someone was teetering on the edge. It was clear in your face and body language that you were one gentle gust of wind from toppling over. Crumbling into pieces he wasn’t sure anyone could put back together.

“What is it then Sweetheart? I’ll help you figure it out, whatever it is.” He whispers, pulling you closer to him, his body heat seeping into you, as the wind blows. You sniffle, your shaking hands coming up to swipe at the tears under your eyes. You take one last breath, eyes closed as you brace yourself.

“I’m pregnant.”

It’s like the world stopped spinning.

Time was suddenly suspended, as you pried your eyes open to look at Simon. His brown eyes were guarded. His brows pulled together, as his hands stopped their motions for a fraction of a second. Your lungs burned from holding your breath, your throat tight. Every muscle in your body was tense, as you waited for him to say something. Do something. You needed some sort of reaction from him. Yelling, screaming, swearing, anything was better than the earth shattering silence that took place after you muttered the two words you hadn’t yet said out loud since you found out.

It wasn’t like you planned on getting pregnant by your one night stand. Hell. It was the LAST thing you wanted. You were always careful to get your birth control shot every 3 months. But with the chaos of the last few months, somewhere along the line you must’ve missed your last appointment. It wasn’t until you went into your appointment earlier today to get a shot that they had informed you they couldn’t administer it. That you were already pregnant.

“Okay.”

The word shocks you, and for a moment you aren’t sure you hear him right. You raise an eyebrow, as you look at Simon.

“Okay?” You ask.

“Yeah, okay. We’ll figure it out.” Simon states, his hands resuming their soothing motion up and down your sides.

“You’re not.. not going to freak out?” You whisper.

“There’s nothing to freak out about, this isn’t just going to go away. So we need to talk about our options, and we will. Just got standing in the back alley of a pub.”

“Okay…” you whisper, as Simon’s hands guide you towards the emergency exit door that he brought you through. The inside of the bar is louder than before, more people have shown up. Soap, Gaz and Price are all talking at the end of the bar. Your glass of water is filled and sitting on a napkin. They all look over when you two walk over.

“Ghost, Soap was just telling me that you and y/n know each other. Small world isn’t it?” Gaz smiles, his brown eyes looking between us.

“We do,” Simon turns to Price, “I’m going to be bringing her home, I’ll see you at 0600 tomorrow, Captain.”

There’s a look that passes between Price and Simon, but he just nods, then turns towards you. “I hope to see you again, dear, maybe next time we can all have a nice meal.”

“Maybe,” you smile, after waving goodbye to Soap and Gaz, Simon leads you out to the street where the cars are parked.

“Did you drive here?” He asks, looking down at you.

“No I took the bus,” you shove your hands into the pockets of your coat. It was still wet from where the guy spilt his drink, and you shivered.

“I’ll drive you home,” Simon takes your hand, pulling you towards his truck. He pulls open the passenger door and waits for you to get settled in the seat before shutting it. You run your hands together as Simon climbs into the driver's seat. He starts the truck, turning the heat on high.

“Where do you live?” He asks, as he turns on the headlights.

“On Ashton street, the apartment complex there” from the corner of your eye you see Simon visibly stiffened, but he doesn’t say anything as he pulls away from the curb. The ride is mainly quiet, neither one of you having much to say. As you get closer to your apartment your anxiety starts to grow again. What if he tells you to get rid of it?

Is that what you wanted? What if he decided he would rather give it up for adoption? Would he help you find a family? Maybe he would tell you he didn’t want anything to do with a baby? Could you deal with a baby? Bile burns in the back of your throat, and you try to swallow it back down. You weren’t about to throw up all over his nice truck. The grimy bathroom of a bar was one thing, but Simon’s leather interior of his car was not an option. Simon turns down a side street, there weren’t many streetlights on this stretch of the drive. You try to focus on the passing shadows but the rolling and twisting in you hug doesn’t let up.

“Can you pull over please?” You whisper, and Simon glances at you. Your hands bunched in the fabric of your coat, your eyes closed as you take deep breaths. Simon eases the car over, barely putting the car in park before you flung the door open and hop out. You move a few feet into the woods, your hands scraping against the tough bark of a tree, as you get sick. Bile burns your throat and nose, tears stream down your cheeks.

Warm hands gather the hair from your face and hold it back. Holding your hair back with one hand the other rubs up and down your back. It takes several minutes of dry heaving for you to be able to stand up. A handkerchief is suddenly floating in front of you. You take it and wipe your mouth with it, shoving it into your pocket after.

“You okay?” Simon asks, as you take a deep breath.

“Yeah, I’m okay, sorry..” you mumble, as you turn back to the car and climb back in. Simon doesn’t say anything as he climbs in and continues to drive to your apartment. As he parks his car, he glances around, his eyes resting on the boarded up windows of the glass door.

“Everything okay?” You ask, noticing as he stares at the glass like he’s trying to get it to tell him what happened to it.

“Yeah. Sorry, let’s go inside,” he mumbles, climbing out and coming to your side. He pulls open your door and offers you a hand. You walk towards the building Simon’s entire body is tense as some residents barrel out of the door. They’re shouting and swearing as they stumble out, a lit cigarette dangling from their fingers. Simon pushes you behind him, as they pass, he watches as they head over to a parked car and continue arguing in front of it.

“They’ll stop arguing after a while. They do this often..” you mutter to Simon as you take his hand pulling him towards the door. He grunts and follows you up the three flights of stairs to your apartment. You hesitate, your hand on the knob as you take a deep breath. Entering was always the hardest part now, every time your hand touches the handle the images of your family break through the mental box you shoved them into. You let out the breath you were holding and pushed open the door. Flicking on the light switch next to the door.

Your eyes falling on the empty couch against the far wall in the living room. Some of the tension leaves your shoulders as you stare at the threadbare fabric. You step further into the apartment allowing Simon to slip in behind you. He turns the locks on the door, and reaches down unlacing his boots.

“I don't have much to offer.. Is water okay?” You ask as you shrug off your alcohol stained coat. The fabric is a sticky mess, the fabric ruined from the drink spilt on it at the bar. Tossing it onto the counter, you head over to the cabinet and take down two glasses.

“Water is okay,” Simon walks into your living room and takes a seat. He watches you fill the two glasses with water and you come and sit on the other side of the couch, handing him the glass.

“When did you find out?” Simons asks, taking his face mask off and shoving it into his pocket and taking a sip of water.

“This afternoon… I went in to get my birth control shot and they make you do a pregnancy test…” You pull your legs up to your chest, holding the glass of water in one hand. The other hand wraps around your shins keeping them pulled up to your chest.

“Did they tell you how far along you are?” He asks, “So we know what our options are, I mean.”

“They said based on the blood work, 12 weeks. But I have to go in to get an ultrasound next week..”

“Okay, so we don't have a lot of time to make a choice… have you thought about what you want to do?” Simon sets his glass down on the table next to the couch.

“I .. I don't know.. I was waiting to hear what you had to say before I made up my mind.” You mumble, your eyes trained on a spot of carpet that is fraying.

“If I'm being honest, I never wanted kids. They were never in my cards… I'm not saying I don't like them, kids are great, I just never pictured myself having any,,” he admits.

Your heart sinks.

Here we go, he's going to tell you to get rid of it, and tell you to delete his number, forget he exists and move on with your life.

“But, with you, it feels right.. There's just something about you that I can't get out of my head and at the risk of sounding like a total barbarian. The thought of having you in my life until I die because of this baby fills me with excitement. I wanted to go after you when you snuck out of my apartment but I didn't want you to be uncomfortable. The night I spent with you was one of the best nights I've ever had. So if you would like to, I would love the chance to raise this baby with you. Even if it's as friends and nothing more. Because I know that you were put into my life for a reason, and I'm going to take any chance I can get to keep you around,” Simon finishes, his hand coming to rest on your ankle.

You sit there for a few moments, mind reeling with everything he just said to you. He wanted to raise a baby with you? Just so he could get to know you? Did you really have that much of a profound effect on him? Would he still feel the same when he found out what had happened to you? Could you do this? I mean really do this?

Babies are huge commitments. They were for life; there was no backing out. But the way Simon was looking at you, like he would take on the world for you with barely knowing you. It made you feel like you could do it. As long as you didn't have to do it alone, well, at least not completely. You chew on your bottom lip for a few more minutes, the thoughts rolling around in your head as Simon's eyes trail around your apartment.

“Okay…” you finally whisper and Simon's head whips towards you.

“Okay?”

“Yeah, okay. I-i don't think i can get rid of it anyway… The thought makes me feel sick,” you confess and the tension in Simon's shoulders all but disappears.

“Alright, we can figure this out. No pressure for us to be together, we can just start by becoming friends, and seeing where things go okay?” He smiles, and its a real genuine smile. Your heart stutters in your chest, and you can't help your own smile that spreads across your lips.

“If we’re being honest here,” you sigh, wringing your hands together in your lap,”I couldn't stop thinking about you either… I mean, even before all… yeah.. You know.”

Simon's hand comes over to rest on the side of your face, and he leans forward pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “I'm glad to hear that I wasn't the only one with lingering thoughts,” he chuckles.

Simon drops his hand and looks around your place once more, a furrow deep in his brow. He opens his mouth to say something but thinks better of it, before he notices the time on the clock hanging on your wall. It was almost 10 and he needed to check over his gear before he shipped out in the morning.

“I hate to do this… but I have to go,” his lips pulled down into a thin straight line.

“Oh right.. You told Price you would see him in the morning…”

“Yeah… Look, i can't tell you much, but i don't know how long i’ll be gone…” he looks around, and grabs the notebook you write your ideas for articles down in and scribbles on a spare piece. “This is my number, i won't promise i’ll respond while i'm away, but if anything happens, call this number 3 times in a row and you’ll get through to someone who can get a message to me okay? But that is only for emergencies, otherwise just text me and i’ll do my best to get back to you, alright?” He tears the paper out, coming to stand in front of you. He presses the paper into your hand. It crumples slightly as you close your hand around it.

“Okay,” you murmur, looking up at him from your spot on the couch. His fingers crush along your cheek as he brushes a strand of your hair back from your face.

“Be safe, keep the door locked… i’ll be back soon and we’ll go do something fun and get to know each other.” Simon smiles, as he takes a few steps backwards towards the door.

“I’ll hold you to it,” you smile, “Be safe out there.”

The only response is the soft click of the door.

Next: Part 4

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yelling-space · 6 months

Text

CELESTE APPRECIATION post

I raerly see anyone mention her but i love her sm yes this is mostly like 98% hc shes only got like 5 lines in hole game what more do u want from me

anyways, my sweet sweet barely domesticated celeste :

-"Why did my husband come back with a child ,a dog ,a living skeleton, a man who can throw him around like he weights nothing and a knight(derogatory)" -Cahara's so wiped 4 her and honesty i would to if that was my wife, she def pegs him 2 btw i mean just look at him, my point exactly.

-gets along with Enki the most 2 everyone's surprise, there paper wight besties. & share a worrie for Cahara they will never verbalise as well a dislike for D'arc- i mean knights.

-celeste is d'arces first (and only) female friend, much to clestes own dismay.

-d'arce thought she was a gold digger at first, as you can tell they had a grate first impression of each other

-only trusts people about as far as she can throw them (rip rag , he can still man handle the group whore with ease tho so good for him)

-can not hold a convo with a child 2 save her life , the length of her mertanl intents extend to bringing the child 2 Cahara .

-she is not mother material but for some reason they're trying to keep a baby with a high infant mortality rate its funny

i think celeste probably didn't have great parents or a good role model, deadbeat drunkard parents that kicked her out and kind of left her to fend for herself & close of to the world and that's why she has such a disillusioned take on parenthood + where her own approach to children comes from but uh oh !! cahara wormed his way into her heart ! and who's to say his clear and utter devotion to this little girl cant win her over either i dont think either her or Cahara were going out of their way to get pregnant - it's like an unfortunate by-product of the nature of Celeste's career, and Cahara's love for her being what led to him being so willing to step up. i don't think either of them ever really thought about having kids, or at least didn't think they'd be good parents, but celeste getting pregnant or cahara bringing back a child is just the way life ended up going. it's the renaissance era, abortion methods are on par with childbirth in terms of deadliness anyway. she's just not going to have to keep risking her life via pregnancy if cahara goes out, gets enough coin to support them both, she's not going to be like every other peasant woman who's forced to become a broodmare because every 1 in 2 children fucking die before they turn 5. clesest being pregnant is just what ended up happening. the love in that is to do with their RELATIONSHIP, not their love for some idealistic family life. i think cahara wanting to give it a try is something celeste would think is really sweet and admirable, but she'd probly keep a lot of her more cynical thoughts to herself on the matter.

saying that i think they both have a lot of cynical thoughts about it really, but i cahara goes so quickly into "this is my wife, this is our future baby" because otherwise what's the point in taking on such a risky mission in the first place ? but if he's got a noble cause, then it might seem worth it, right ? it's that extra push of encouragement for him, even if it comes with a lot of scary things like the responsibility, being a parent, maybe settling down witch is a scary thought for someone whos always so used 2 being on the move

as for celeste ; she doesn't even know if she's going to make it through the pregnancy, or if the baby will. it's just another mouth to feed at the end of the day. she doesn't care about carrying on a legacy, or raising a child into greatness like so many others beg and plead of god to bestow upon their children. she knows she'd be a shit mom and she's hardly a loyal partner at the moment. but she loves cahara, and seeing that fear in his eyes when she told him, but also that spark of light, that little bit of joy, made it at least worth holding on for.

celeste: it's probably not going to make it anyway, i either risk death in childbirth or death in abortion methods, so. celeste: its getting me enough bank rn to keep myself healthy so we'll just see what happens i guess celeste watching cahara bring home an entire child:

okay cringe time over. i wont go into 2much detail about her relationship with the others though i think its a very slow process of her learning to tolerate get along with the creatures friends cahara brought back -as soon as celeste meets d'arce her mild suspicion and distaste for ragnvaldr will be replaced with her disgust for d'arce -think celeste would be pissed she wouldn't be able 2 pull cahara out of ragnvaldrs grip unless she stabbed him or something, witch shes both angry about it but also relieved since it probably kept cahara out of trouble in the dungeon (because lord knows her husband is a magnet for trouble) inside me there are 2 wolfs ; one is mmm hot stong wife carry cahara like a sack of pataos , the other is screaming at me that this is the 1600 and she would be starving and poor. so to compromise with myself im going 2 say : - physical speaking celsest is probly stronger then most women in her profession and could probly drag an unconscious cahara around then againg i also think cahras way ligher then someone of his build&carear should be shes stronger then enki (then againg who isnt) but cant match d'arces physical strength. saying that modern au Celeste would beat d'arce in an arm wrestle.

in-refence 2 my last post; celest is a child darkness, she has a barbie killer husband,there for. she deserves to be as much hater as she likes d'arce: you two are the healthiest couple i know who still have an avid sex life cahara: ASSUMPTIONS ! celeste: we're the only couple you know.

acholic wise i think celeste could out drink d'arce (and at least keep up with ragnvaldr for a little bit)

celeste: d'arce is a pain in the ass cahara: :confustion: :stress_smile: she means well babe cmon celeste: im gonna beat her with a stick cahara: ,, babe,,

cleseste is not payed enough 2 be d'arces therpist or help d'arce figure out she likes women (shes not payed at all actuly,she is simply trying 2 tolrate her husbands new freinds becuse she loves him but also only has so meny braincells she can lose in a day and conversing with d'arce seems 2 kill all of them)

celeste hears d'arce talk about jeanne once and instantly starts going "wow you loved a girl wow that girl who was like you in every way wow that girl who like. shared your morals. or something. wow tell me more about that girl" (stab stab stab metaphorically stab stab stab)

(about cahara getting arrsed and taken by the police) rag: you lack of concern,,, concerns me. are you not worried ? celeste: dogs always find their way back home.

- d'arce and cahara make the same enamoured and light-blush expression whenever celeste rages btw - celeste :handshake: enki taking the piss out of knights + a generally more cynical outlook on life & being cold bitches that secretly care about cahara a lot

(first time they all stayed the night) enki learning hes the favorite for once and he thinks its just the most hilarious thing to fucking happen local woman-lover put out by being rejected by hot scary wife, local berserker intimidated by what scary wife might do if she finds out what he did to her precious boytoy local shadow wizard ? on the floor ugly laughing because scary wife reluctantly asked if he wanted the guest bedroom.

celeste: YOURE NOT STAYING HERE PERMANENTLY. but youre allowed to stay overnight. enki: is this (gags) kindness ? oh my god. revolting. celeste: is that a yes or not you fucking worm enki: yesplease

#celeste fear and hunger #fear and hunger #celeste ily #take a shot everytime i spelt her name wrong #cahara #enki #ragnvaldr #d'arce #i love pitting 2 bad bitchs against each other when its not over a man and 1s obluous 2 the fact the other fucking hates her #didnt mention it ealer but cleste bi queen btw #i dont Rembert if i mentioned it in my post but clests dislike of d'arce stems from her being a knight #this isnt d'arce slander btw i love her i just like bullying her even more #celeste when shes a little hater and i love her for that #enki expences being someone's fav for the first time #rag when hes both terrified by but slightly curious about his little freinds wife #the girl fear and hunger

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gingerjolover · 9 months

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HOLIDAY REQUEST SEASON EEEE HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!! okay so we know that julien definitely isn’t enthralled by the holidays because of the stereogum interview buuuut i cant shake the vision of julien and soft!gf facing off in a (ginger)bread (see what i did there!!!!!) house battle like idk i could just imagine soft!gf running errands at the store, coming across a gingerbread house kit and being like…..yes!

omggggg... also i see what u did there teehee

im gonna hc this bc this is sooo cute

i feel like soft!gf and julien compromise a lot in their relationship, like they show up for each other in many different ways even when the other isn't super stoked

jb shows up for you EVERY. CHRISTMAS. like yeah she doesn't love christmas but she looooves you so she indulges your every whim during the holidays

if we are in the same universe (soft!gf and julien have moved to LA and the house needed renovations/the end of touring/lots of events taking place and so on, so their holiday party/housewarming is taking place around the holidays) then you are zooooming around running errands trying to prep

thankfully munagenius is helping a lot and you thank your lucky stars for bff!kelli bc boy does she come thru for you

but it's exactly like that, soft!gf sees these gingerbread kits at like world market or something and there's a sale on traditional ones but then there's a midcentury modern kit and a camper one (these are real)

so you get a couple of the traditional ones (maybe for a mungenius hangout or group date night) and then get some of the cool ones

and you come home so excited and julien is matching your excitement because she doesn't like christmas but she likes how excited you get around the holidays and the constant twinkle in your eyes

julien greets you in the driveway, one of your dogs at her calf as she waits for you to park, her tattoos out and about in her linen button down

"didja buy the whole store?" julien asks teasingly, her hand pulling you into her by your beltloops, kissing your cheek and jaw in quick succession

"we have like 25 people coming over jay," you say unamused but unable to fight the smile at her affections, starting to grab bags

but boyfriend!julien is lowkey jacked and can get 95% of the bags in her arms as she quickly waddles into the house

julien is rifling through the bags when you get inside, pulling out the gingerbread houses before you can even butter her up

"i saw them at the store and i thought it would be so fun...look," you say grabbing the midcentury modern house and showing her the box

julien sees how excited you are and loves a good craft so she acts like its such a chore but once dinner has been eaten and the dishes have been washed, julien is putting plastic down on the dining room table and organizing all the supplies as if it was her idea

and lets be real, julien gets into it, okay?

soft!gf is a little genius so there's extra icing and candy and toppings for the houses on the table

and julien is constructing a masterpiece, murmuring to herself, "need a good foundation...good bones," or something like that

"i bet i could build us a real house baby..." "im sure you could jules."

and somewhere between letting the houses set and decorating, julien gets competitive

"i thought you wanted us to decorate it like it was our real house jay?"

"i do but im just going to do it better than you :)" and she smiles so sassily you're like fine, game on

and julien is soooo messy

she has icing all over her hands and on her cheek

and she's popping candies into her mouth left and right

"jay stop i needed those for my roof!" "you're roofing too slow babe, 's not my fault"

and there's Christmas music playing softly in the background, the dogs are sleeping underneath the table at y'alls feet and as it gets dark the Christmas lights husband!julien so diligently crafted around the house on a timer go off

and for the first time in a long time julien looks around and is so genuinely happy with the christmas-ness of her environment

and its silly like her and soft!gf are literally making replicas of their house out of inedible gingerbread and its so christmassy it should make her sick but she sees the streaks of icing on your cheekbone and how you've placed little m&ms in a repetitive pattern on the roof of your gingerbread house and she decides that the focused look on your face with your tongue peeking out, an almost ethereal glow behind your head from the Christmas lights is worth dealing with some of the lingering anger and resentment she has during the holidays if it means she can create new traditions with you and learn to love Christmas

<3 sorry its late guys

i feel like ive forgotten how to write and post and im in my imposter syndrome era ;P

#anon cutie #julien baker x reader #julien baker blurbs #julien baker hc #gingybread’s holidaze

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cal-daisies-and-briars · 13 days

Note

I did not do this fast enough and now I cant find the emojis so im gonna try and do my best with remembering the fics you had:

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨(That ending though. My heart was breaking and healing at the same time when Chris came in)

🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟🧟(OOOOH Im curious to see who is showing up and also learn more about Buck and Eddie's journey!)

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️(THEY ARE FINALLY MARRIED..in a great ceremony by the way!!!)

WOO! Let's do it!

30 for 🚨 (awww glad it resonated!!!!!!!!):

---

“I’m glad you’re catching yourself,” he says.

Buck nods. Yes, that does feel significant.

“Uh, I don’t know what you have in mind,” Buck says. “Or how difficult my past would make something like adoption. But if the question is, would I want that with you? The answer is yes.”

Eddie grins. “Really?”

“Really,” Buck smiles back. “That would be like… Like a dream, I guess.”

Eddie’s cheeks look a little rosy.

“Yeah, I, uh… I think so, too.”

iv.

It’s February and Eddie is looking at engagement rings.

It’s not premature. He keeps telling himself that. As if someone is going to jump out of the woodwork and accuse him of exactly that. They won’t. Who fucking would? So he’s looking at engagement rings. It’s been a year. A year since Eddie was buried alive and nearly drowned and kept swimming until Buck found him. A year since Buck held him while he pulled himself out of his own paralyzing terror at the thought of dying. A year since he changed his will. A year since they fell into bed together. Almost a year since they both declared their love. And Eddie is still so in love with him.

---

30 for 🧟 (answers to half of that this chapter!)

---

Eddie likes how light Buck seems. Like he floats where other people trudge. There’s a brightness to him, even among all the ruin.

“Maybe things could be okay, though,” Buck says after a second. “Maybe we could all have good lives, you know?”

Eddie smiles, despite the corpse dragging themselves around outside his truck window.

“Yeah,” he concedes. “Maybe.”

▪️▪️▪️

They make it to Shannon’s more easily than he would have expected. They don’t see anyone alive that isn’t zombified. No raiders or deranged lunatics. No danger beyond the obvious. Eddie imagines that there are people alive in Los Angeles. He imagines these millionaires and billionaires up in the hills, in those big celebrity compounds, could make an easy go of it. Well, he won’t disturb them. He just came for his family.

They have to be careful getting out of the truck. The zombies may not be doing too well, but they still outnumber Eddie and Buck by a lot.

“I’ve got your back,” Buck assures him.

And maybe it’s because he was a firefighter, maybe it’s because he’s persuasive, or maybe it’s just because Eddie thinks he’s hot - regardless, he trusts him. They dismount from the truck, weapons loaded, safety off. Buck covers Eddie’s back, while Eddie mounts the stairs to the apartment’s entryway.

Eddie tries not to let the fact that the apartment looks abandoned make him abandon hope. Sure, there are big cracks in the cement stairs up to the front door. And the glass door is shattered. Yes, what appears to be a disembodied remains of a foot sits off to the side in an overgrown garden. But surely, he didn’t actually think Shannon would be just sitting in the apartment waiting for him. No, he came here for clues. Clues to where Shannon might be.

Buck keeps his gun aimed at a zombie across the road from them. It seems to be missing most of its leg and is laying, moaning, under a street sign. Maybe that’s where the foot is from.

“If it gets closer, I’ll shoot it,” Buck says.

#daisies and briars writes #any other way fic #go and kill go and die fic #things we're all too young to know fic

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luka-couffaine-ship-tournament · 10 months

Text

Round 1 Side A - Pair 1

CAMPAIGN

Luka Couffaine/Marinette Dupain-Cheng

-They‘re just so good for each other. Luka is such a calming presence in Marinette‘s chaotic life and helps her relax when she feels anxious and unsure of herself, always willing to be there for her and offer a helping hand during tough times. Marinette has a deep appreciation not only for Luka‘s ability to play music but also hear heart songs, as if she understood immediately what he meant after listening to him play for the first time. They feed off each other‘s creative energy and are just generally so wholesome together. I could talk about them forever, they make me so happy!!

-Luka is the best boy, and deserves love from the girl he adores

-I just woke up and am too lazy to think of words for my favorite couple so here's some gifs as propaganda

Gif de gifs-misc

Gif de bizarrelovesquare

Gif de notasiren21

Gif de ouiladybug

Gif de kochengnoir

Gif de jeldraximo14

Gif de notasiren21

Luka Couffaine/Sabrina Raincomprix

-Listen, Sabrina needs someone who treats her well, she needs someone who considers her an equal and someone to show her what real love is like. And I truly and honestly think that she would try her best to understand and appreciate Luka but who he really is (if she can see the good in Chloe she is capable of seeing a God when she meets one)

-Vote lukabrina people. We cant lose this!

-This is just unfair we need to help our girl out!

I'll start!

Item Number One: Viperhound Is S Tier

This is the fucking duo right here, this is endlessly clever and positive tag team action, this is a pair who will NOT fail the mission alright?

They are designed so interestingly parallel and then put right next to each other in this sweeping shot of the new miraculous squad???

Like, am I supposed to not assume something about it??

Item Number Two: opposites contrast

Orange and Blue, extremely Sun and Moon energy, but I don't think that would make this ship sail smoothly. See, Luka likes being a moon. He is happy to support and enjoys being someone's shining beacon in the endless dark of night, and no one needs that kind of anchor to hold onto more than Sabrina right now. Sabrina cut ties with her best and only friend and while we see her hanging out with other classmates just fine, we don't really know how she is with being actual friends with people. I don't think anyone has tries to reach out to her since evillustrator and we saw in that episode how she approaches new potential connections. Overwhelmingly cheerful and warm and oppressively clingy, like a ray of sunlight that won't leave your eyesight on the hottest day of the year. She means well but, boy, she can be a lot. And more importantly, she needs to be the one helping because, what kind of friend is she if she isn't? Who is she if she's not doing everything for everybody else? It would, amusingly and annoyingly and endearingly, put her into conflict with Luka, who is similarly always pushing his own problems aside to help people with theirs. This would lead them into a loving rivalry of "take care of yourself" "no u" that goes both ways, a back and forth that ends with them reluctantly letting the other help them. And after so many years as someone's shadow, Sabrina deserves to have someone in her orbit, someone she shines a light on when he needs to be seen.

Item Number Three: YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE

Look I'm SORRY okay, but I have to say this even tho I also think their ship got done dirty by the show, I still think they wouldn't have lasted. I think Marinette and Luka being "too easy" is exactly their problem, as even if they didn't have everything else to worry about Marinette needs complexity or she starts to lose her mind overthinking things and goes looking for it. The simple nature of her relationship with Luka is what 13 year old Marinette needed, the Marinette who wasn't Ladybug yet, who hadn't stood up to Chloe and maybe even just had her heart broken in a mean prank. It makes sense she'd fall in love with and gravitate towards this living embodiment of all the comfort and security she wished she had, she had desperately needed at that time. But that's just it, she needed it then. And now she can rely on herself a lot better, she has a whole support system to fall back on, and what she needs from a romantic partner is something else. But Sabrina? She's done horrible things in the name of her friendship with Chloe and even enjoyed some of them, but had finally hit her limit of how much abuse she can both dish out and take herself. Sabrina can definitely recognize that Luka is a good person, but more importantly Luka would have to actually try to sympathize with a person, rather than just immedietely like them. Lest we forget, Sabrina is the one who locked Juleka in the bathroom on picture day. Chloe told her to but Sabrina physically did it. Being confronted with someone who hurt his sister but is, herself, hurting, and is determined to help everyone but herself will be a lot of conflicting emotions for Luka, and Sabrina would need to get used to being the center of someone else's attention in a way not entirely dissimilar to how Chloe was for her, although significantly less codependent.

What makes Lukabrina interesting isn't that they're perfect for each other or that it's immedietly easy.

It's awkward and messy and they clash, they push each other out of their comfort zones and find a new one to settle in together.

It isn't instant or love at first sight, but by resolving their issues with each other through communication, honesty and trust, they are able to become a happy and wholesome couple.

Don't fucking tell me the odds lol, I know they're probably not winning but they deserve a fighting chance. So please feel free to add your own Lukabrina Viperhound propaganda!

TAG:

Luka/Marinette - @mikoriin

Luka - Twitter @Karma_sensei_

@lukacouffaineappreciation

#luka couffaine #miraculous ladybug #viperion #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #ship tournament #tournament poll #tumblr polls #tumblr tournament #fandom polls #polls #luka x marinette #lukanette #luka x sabrina #sabrina raincomprix #marinette dupain cheng #mlb marinette #mlb sabrina

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thatdeadaquarius · 2 years

Note

Theres a lot of cuss words in this one so be warned lol

Bro i just had this-- insane fucking idea when i saw your "flowery words" post and i just-- omg I just had to shareee

So reader right? Very blunt, straight to the point sentences that dont dance around the bushes for 6 hours trying to tell you "oh no your house is on fire" or something, yeah? Well-- what if it turns the OPPOSITE when they start to SWEAR--

Because like-- i know myself. Me and like, so many people i know speak like that (blunt and straight to the point) but like-- when i get even MILDLY inconvenienced, i will start swearing like i have a masters degree in cursing out you and your entire flippity flappity bloodline

So id imagine the contrast to be like--

Reader, chill: aether, we're supposed to be going that way, this is literally the wrong direction

Reader, stubbing their toe: oW FUCK SHIT TITS-- WHY HAVE THE GODS FORSAKEN ME SO-- I CAME OUT HERE, TO THIS POINT, TO THIS PLACE, HOPING AGAINST ALL HOPE AND DESPITE SIGNS AND PORTENDS SUGGESTING OTHERWISE THAT I MIGHT, SOMEHOW, FIND MYSELF HAVING A PLEASANT EXPERIENCE, AND YET, HERE I STAND, ALONE AGAINST THE WORLD, FEELING ASSAULTED, ATTACKED ON ALL FRONTS, NOT KNOWING MY ENEMY'S NAME NOR HIS FACE NOR WHETHER OUR BATTLE IS DONE--

(Yes this is the "i came out here to have a good time and im honestly feeling so attacked rn" post)

I can just imagjne the sHEER WHIPLASH-- like, this dude has been speaking in the "divine tongue" or whatever and then suddenly theyre immediately reverted to their "lowly mortal jargon" or something-- AHAHA

Or like-- if it just turns into a reeeeeally long string of curse words, everyone would probably be so scandalized or something lolllll

YES YESS PSPSPSPSPSPSSS COME TO ME ASKS, COME TO MY INBOX COME ! !

Anyway, with our sponsor's message out of the way,

Bless you for this 🙏 my pets are fed, my crops are watered, my skin is clear

✨️This is gorgeous, just a gorgeous idea ✨️

I LIVE for Teyvat being scandalized maidens from the Victorian era, gOD BLESS ITD BE WONDERFUL

Like our modern music?? Absolutely would give heart attacks, not even the most stoic of them would escape the blush

Esp with cussing pretty please i wish i could see the looks on their faces, they'd also probably blush at how creative it can get lmao

(daresay, maybe even impressed?)

oh the whiplash, its be so funny, every time. No one can keep up with you, you've got Teyvat linguists stumbling, the older beings cant understand you sometimes, the newer ones only understand you SOME of the time, and apparently most often? Only when you're cursing??

(I think various characters would find an ancient deity only deigning to speak their lang. when they gotta cuss smth out the funniest shit ever, like Venti, Itto, Cyno?, Diona, Hu Tao, Kaeya, maybe Kazuha, Lisa, Nahida probably would get a giggle, Rosaria, Heizou, Childe, Tighnari might like, be trying desperately to hold back a laugh but it's not working, Scaramouche/Wanderer, Xingqiu, Yae Miko would def commission a light novel for this, and Yelan - im so sorry i listed who exactly, this is so long ill stop, i just thought someone would like to see it 😭😭)

(I CAME OUT HERE TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AND IM HONESTLY FEELING SO ATTACKED RN LMAO U MADE IT SO LONG AND FLUFFY THAT WAS PERFECT)

THANK YOU!! FOR THE ASK!! WHAT A LOVELY TIME!! COME BACK AGAIN!! WHENEVER!! :DD!!

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

#my asks #ask box open #please send asks #everyone #i would love to hear ur rambles or essays abt this topic #pls share with the class #genshin sagau ideas #genshin imagines #genshin impact #sagau #gender neutral reader

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plaguethewaters · 6 months

Text

@thetiredyuk i am having more Thoughts about that one - ranboo is the sone of death beeduo au. I was about to just send you an ask but also this is almost 2k words so it may be better off as a post lmfao

So like. bullet points time, this is an approximate summary of what i think the Plot would be like - wordbuilding aside

(Temporary mcd, suicide warning)

Year like, 1500 something (to be more well researched but i do want it to be like. something something renaissance. it works) we've got two poor ass kids born of the same year. Except tommy is pretty much a normal guy, liked by his family and such. His parents have enough children they can gamble for at least one to be successfull, so they send him to be a painter's apprentice in the hope he'll make some kind of money. There, in the slighter bigger town thats almost a city but not quite, he meets tubbo. Now Tubbo would have been a normal guy, except he was born with facial deformities so now everyone thinks he's a demonic freak hated by the gods (this renaissance world is politheistic bc kristin needs to be there and also i wil not do christianity if i dont have to lmao.)

Tommy is not intimidated by any gods. obviously. also his dad is really into the goddess of death and he prays enough for both of them, so he's like. protected and shite. And he immidiately hits it off with the cursed boy

surprise hes not actually cursed but people are dicks anyways. Tommy makes him a fancy mask to cover his face - even thought its totally cool as shit, but its cool enough only tommy should ever get to see it - and that eventually does help him. Because tubbo wasnt like, a shit guy. Hes a damn good builder and knows how to read, which are talents big enough that the costruction workers for that church out of town are ready to ignore the whole probably cursed thing. As long as he as the masks.

Tommy: makes him the first genuine gift hes ever received in fifteen years of life Tubbo: never takes it off again. like never Tommy: shocked pikachu face

anyways so tommy dies like. super young. They have their fun for a few years but at like seventeen tommy is called to be the artist for this very fancy duke of the town over - and at the start they'r super happy bc that means Money and Food and Roof over your head and shite. its a very good fucking deal.

except the noble is a bastard. His town revolts against him, and when they storm the castle they aren't exactly asking names or faces: tommy gets immidiately like, super destroyed by the crowd, and dies a few minutes later.

Tubbo hears of this like five months later bc its the fifteen hunderds and hes poor.

He does Not take it very well ngl

He goes a bit murdery - basically hes like "im not living without tommy, might as well burn down a village while im at it right, right."

Now ranboo, in all of this, freshly the equivalent of seventeen for an immortal death being, is starting on their training to actually become death- His mom send him on a quaint little village in europe thinking "hey, the most those guys die of is like. malaria. consumption maybe. itll be easy as hell"

And now like two hundred different souls are around him with FIRE written on their foreheads and Ranboo feels distinctly outside of his range, to be really honest.

he steps a couple ethereak planes down just to see what the heck is the matter - if this is another of those voide beings his mom will be Super Pissed and they want to see that reaction

And it isnt the void people

Instead, in front of their eyes, the singular most beautiful person hes ever seen - and hes seen lots, in this line of work.

He cant see their face, but their actions speak enough. The sheer rage, the almost dance like movement of their body perfectly framed by the light of their torch, seeing no humanity or mercy in whatever their searching for. their hair look angelic in its softness, burnt by the worst flames of hell and yet tended by the same hands who wield it - strong hands, clearly forged by hard work and dedication. This is a guy who has nothing to lose, and there's little Death loves most than someone who doesnt fear it.

He has to go down, has to speak to them immidiately.

So he does.

There's really no time - his mom had given the singular rule not to interact with humans, shell be on them in Seconds- but one question can be asked in the haste: "What brings a mortal to do this?"

"It's all for you, love!" the mortal says. They also say some other things, after, but Ranboo is not very well versed in the human tongue and they are speaking Very Loudly.

(Tubbo actually said "Fuck you, you motherfucker it's Your Fault, you took every single thing i love". Easy mistake, if one thinks about it.)

Their mom is Pretty Pissed but she does undesrtand stupid things done for young love. So she's like "eh, ive loved mortals too. go have fun" and everything

Except a year passes, and ranboo still hasnt even spoken to the guy, and she remembers suddenly Mortality Exists.

Shes never had them take a soul who died naturally - for lack of occasion, mostly - and they may have been. a tad sheltered. They most definitely do Not know what death actually is like for humans, nor how long does it take for them to die

she wonders if it would be a tad overprotective to take this over for them

she thinks about seventy years in the future, at most, when the boy dies. She thinks that her son cannot cry but can definitely cry. she thinks of their screams of sadness ringing through her ears-

Tubbo wakes up in the river, alive.

He did not Intend to be alive, and it's actually quite unfortunate for him to be so.The survivors are quite angry and probably close to him, now. Welp, no way to die is reallt any worse than another, he thinks. Ill just wait here for them.

When the pitchfork collapses his heart and he continues breathing, he understands something might be a little bit wrong.

And like, a good five hundred years pass like this.

Things Tubbo has learned in his five hundred, twenty three and two halves years on this demon forsaken earth:

Clothes get so much shittier over time. he has One (1) tailored shit from the 1800 and Nothing has even barely compared to it ever since.

getting stabbed does not hurt less just because youre not actually dying. Poisoning is actiively way worse since you're not actually dying. Diving off cliffs is Not Fun. In general, try not to do dying things even if youre immortal

theres a hole in his heart where his loved ones were and it will never get filled

Food gets esponentially better over time. Lord bless whoever decided curry should go on chicken because they were Cooking For Real. Chocolate was still better before though.

Working for soulles bosses has not changed At All in all of this time tho.

he works at mcdonalds because no college would accept his non existant resume, and being immortal dosent deprive him of his needs unfortunately. The manager took one look at this kid dressed from like three different centuries with a goat mask on his head and was like. why not. at least youre not a stoner and you know how to read.

His coworkers firmly believe hes a criptid and have a full going investigation to prove it. The highest bet at fifty dollars says hes mothman in disguise, there to eat the fliest that live on their shitty food. The lowest bets hes an angel waiting for the right time to brign down armageddon.

Every night he goes in the woods to an almost forgotten Death altar and he prays. Half of his prayers consist of insults and the other half are pleas for her to fucking kill him already

This does not help the criptid chronicles

Kristin also has like. only so much patience. Hes holding up the prayers line - which is actually still pretty fucking used in central asia - and hes generally annoying as shit.

She takes ranboo by the scruff, gives them a passable human form, and throws them down there. Get your shit together boy youre like a thousand years old. Get your man (to stop fucking with the phoneline)

Ranboo is Not Enthusiastic about this but cmon. Hes death. How hard can working at a mac really be?

Spoiler it is

Spoiler it does Not matter, because awkwardness aside ranboo is funny, and easy to talk to, and compassionate and caring. He doesnt want to kill tubbo, he doesnt look at him like hes a fictional creature (and yes marcie, hes seen the bet table), he isnt his soulless boss. Tubbo is grieving but he also very desperstely wants a friend.

One day someone stops at his shitty apartment at like three am

Ranboo stands in fron of his door drenched from head to toe, holding the possibly smallest kitten tubbo has ever seen in his Life. Hes miserable but the cat is miracoulously dry, screaming their head off - and ranboo is panicking. Are they okay are they dying? Do you have any food i dont know what he eats but its so small and i didnt know where else to go- please i dont want it to die or something and-

The moon shines on their long, wet hair and their stupid fucking suit is as wrinkled as ever. They look like they desperately want to rub their hands against each other but there is a kitten in the way and it probably makes them even more anxious - theres very little messes bigger than him, right now.

Tubbo falls in love.

They heal the kitten and keep enderchest in their now shared apartment.

They grow closer, and closer, and something is forming. Ranboo is aware a relationship cannot be based on lies, as much as it worries him how tubbo will react.

so he prepares like a romantic ass evening

roses and candles and a nice dinner with a fancy wine

tubbo almost gets flustered

except at the end of the night the confession isnt "i love you" but "im the guy who took away your only ffamily".

and he sees Red.

Ranboo doesnt remember what tubbo screamed, not exactly. He remembers grief, and crying, and feeling worse than he ever believed he could. He remembers the endless guilt sitting in his chest, and the slam of a door - maybe from the inside out. Hes definitely outside, now, and the house ifìs far away enough eh cant see it, but that could also be the tears.

His mother finds him crouched in a patch of grass, tears steaming down their cheeks in a constant flow. Shes not aware if they'd returned to death form to feel safer, or because they believed they deserved the burn. Shes not sure what option makes her feel worse.

shes aware that this is. pretty much her fault

TO HER DEFENSE she was not really aware humans were so touchy about death. The souls she reaps arent very talkative and the guy shes with is chill about it so like. maybe this one is weird

(the guy she's with is Phil, whos Decidly not a human but has also decided not to tell her yet. For the bit, yknow? He's been a live a couple thousand years, it would be awkward to drop it now. He's also somewhat a serial killer and Not Normal about death At All)

BUt this is still here fault and she does have to set it right a little bit

So she summons Tubbo to her persnoal room in the palace and goes like. "oi. why r u so mad little guy"

And hes like: you took away the single person whos ever loved me ever

"Wait that's the only problem?"

"What the fuck else would it be"

"thought u were mad at him cause he lied lol"

"LYING IS NOT WORSE THAN KILLING A GUY"

Anyways Kristen is so relieved rn. She thought tubbo was phisically like, repulsed by the concept of death and all, and he was mad that Ranboo lied to him and all. Which he is, but the rage is so so much less than the grief yknoe. And she knows how to fix it if its just one (1) measly soul

Tommy is so fucking confused

Th modern world is full of sounds and weird textures and the food is fucking fantastic but also Too Much, and Tubbo introduced him to this weird ass potion hed called a bong and now hes seeing gods the likes of which had never been discoveres

Over all hes just happy to be alive and with his best friend

He kinda hates ranboo. The fucker threw a scyte at him for no reason when tommy would have Almost Certainly survived because he is simply That Cool. Ranboo didn't believe in his awesomeness enough and is thus a Bitch

Tubbo is. iffy

He cant deny he has a teensy tiny crush now, because hes far too deep in this for that

But also ranboo did like. lie straight to his face

but also tubbo would Not have believed him if a random guy showed up at three am at a mcdonalds saying they were the child of death

and he Did trust that what he saw in ranboo was real, betrayal aside. No one fakes looking That much like a wet cat

so it does take a while. couple years in fact, to get back at the level of trust they had before (inster a cool anime montage where they have lots of fun together as roommates and cats coparents and all)

One night when they are - not back together, because they hadnt been dating before, but back to that almost definitely dating just not officialized stage- ranboo asks him if would ever want to be mortal again.

And tubbo thinks of it. His time on earth had been so plagued by grief hed never really ecperienced anything it had to offer. Hed never seen the sights or did anything at all besides praying for death, and thats kind of a shitty way to pass five hundred years

'But tubbo what about your humanity? wouldnt it be irrevocabily lost by giving awau something so fundamentally human as death" someone would ask. And tubbo would anser "ehh who cares"

He hasnt been fully human since hes burned that whole village down, anyway. And he likes the benefits of this life more than whateer moral superiority a Normal human would have over him

just-

"and tommy too, obviously. I get the feeling you dont like him dead" Ranboo jokes.

There's no decision at all then. Fuck yeah, immortal boyfriend and immortal brother what more could a fucker want.

They get to cause chaos on earth and probably kill a bunch of rich people for a long long time

the end :)

Im like. very tentatively calling this Deathless Death, in the vane hope that i will write something for this better thant bullet points. But for now bullet points it is

#beeduo #cbeeduo #ctubbo #cranboo #ctommy #dsmp fanfiction #dsmp fanfic #this is the longest thing ive written in Months #plague writes

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moonschocolate · 9 months

Text

Tom Riddle headcanons!!

because lately i've been thinking about this tragic little human <3

tw: mention of torture as a topic

first of all I wanted to clarify that in this there's no Voldemort, no interest in practicing dark magic, just a teen who goes to Hogwarts soo... :)

proud slytherin. no matter how much other people can say 'slytherin = bad' he just doesn't care, he will not argue with you if you think or say that cause he will find it pointless

I don't now where I read this, but if I'll find it I will tag the person who said this before me: he has autism!!

which means he is not a very social person, and he has little/no friends

and he is deeply attached to an object/topic

the topic in question is dark magic

he doesnt want to practice it, he just finds the whole thing interesting

which deeply concerns professors

he knows everything. about horcruxes, the three unforgivable curses, origin and all

he simply thinks that knowledge is knowledge

IF HE READS?!?! OH DAMN

i strongly believe he has one hell of a library in his dorm

the most dramatic myths ever? knows them

he's just a nerd

read books about t0rture, c0mmunism, n@zism, because knowledge is knowledge

also reads light books of course i dont want to scare you

maths is not his thing

like yes he's good at it but he doesnt really care

did i say hes dramatic?

and an absolute pessimist

since i do not believe that his hair is like that just because it is, he HAS to have a hair routine (DROP IT TOM)

has an infinite collection of bookmarks

no person is allowed to touch his books

doesnt write on books even with pencils

listens to DRAMATIC classical music

EXAMPLE

(also y'all have to teach me how to put spotify songs with the blue rectangle cuz i dont have a clue on how)

JUST THE START

Idk it reminds me of him (and regulus but this is not about him)

this goes against the fact that he's dramatic, but i think that in a relationship he would be a good-old fashioned lover boy

flowers, love letters, POEMS, kissing in the rain, handing you his jacket when you're cold

and of course he wears suits

NOT a sports kid

mf doesn't know a single sport

he just learned how to swim

that's it

is defo the kind of person who is SOSOSOSOSO SKINNY

He's skeptical af on food

like i believe he's a picky eater

and i dont think he eats a lot

like he will go through the day with some coffees, some water, breakfast and a snack in the afternoon

is always gentle doing anything

when he's mad he's even more mad that he can't throw anything because then he would be even more angry that it got broken

has NO PHYSICAL FORCE AT ALL

Like his arms are spaghetti

im sorry but imo he's short

like 1.70 cm (5'5''-5'6'')

which is not really short

I CANT SEE HIM AS A TALL BEING

will not admit it but hates the sea

like as long as he can reach with his feet the "land" below then it's no problem

if he can't he'll try to act cool and say he's tired and immediately get out of the sea

it gives him a sense of pure confusion because he doesnt know what he could run into

which annoys him

because when he cant know something it hurts him physically emotionally psychologically

he knows plenty of languages

english, french, latin, russian and german

why?

because it's cool

also knows how to play the piano and the flute and the viola

"never judge a book by its cover" he does exactly the opposite

especially with books he judges the book by the cover, if he likes the cover he'll like the book too

and people can gain his interest only at first sight

he hates how lots of people can easily change their opinions as long as their group/loved ones have a different opinion

or how people always follow the crowd

people who judge mudbloods just because they're mudbloods are too stupid for him

i think we all know that he is THE teachers' pet

he's the Hermione of his generation

which means that while there are plenty of people with their hands raised the only one who will be listened to is tom

is a MANIAC in cleaning

his bed and his overall room is always tidy af

he hates getting his uniform dirty

he has plenty of nightmares about his past

which he never talks about with anyone

is the kind of person to have 4 or 5 cats

he is absolutely quiet

i got a strong feeling that this man was bullied before hogwarts at the orphanage

he has a cute little stuffed animal in really bad shape which he has from his years at the orphanage and it's hidden at the end of his wardrobe

he strongly despises children because he doesn't have a clue how to deal with them

acts like he has patience

lacks patience

in a modern au, the only thing he'd have going to school would be a black pen

not because he didnt care or was too lazy to get other things but because he didnt find having 3985729947 pens and highliters necessary

dada would be boring for him because out of curiosity he would've already learned most of the spells or wtv

i dont remember if i said it but quidditch is NOT something he likes

or just flying on a broom in general

(remus lupin behavior)

(I had to say it)

studying consists in him burying his face in the books for like 4 or 5 hours straight (my man has some serious issues)

you could tell im completely delusional because he became a killer and nothing's good-old fashioned lover boy about canon him but oh well🥰

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razzmothazz · 6 months

Text

wxs physical build headcanons for me to draw later!!

before and way later on after joining wxs edition

cw: mention of a lot of different eating habits and small mentions of body image issues

TSUKASA!!

before: a bit underweight, i imagine he got a bit too into eating "healthy" at times and would refuse a lot of foods he deemed unhealthy, which caused him to not get certain nutrients at times even tho he needed them, add to that his forgetfulness especially when it comes to taking care of himself and you can see why hes skinny like that. i also imagine he would often burn more calories than he consumed in a day with all his practicing and just running around in general, which is definetly not that good when youre already underweight. he would often wonder why he seemingly just cant gain any muscle and assumed its just kinda how he naturally is, tho he didnt mind much since his build was similar to a lot of his idols

after: he gained some healthy weight!!!! yippieee!!! with wxs constantly reminding him to take care of himself + with emu bringing some food/snacks nearly everyday he gained some healthy weight, hes now pretty average with maybe a bit of chub in some places. he also finally started building some muscle thanks to all the practice and ruis "training"? if you can call it that? he does get a bit insecure about it at times, wishing he would be back to his build that was like his idols, but wxs are quick to remind him that the best star is a happy and healthy one!! his natural state definitely wasnt skinny, at least not as skinny as he was before

NENE!!!!!

before: you already know she was malnourished and looked like she barely saw the light of day... she had a very weak appetite and her horrible sleep schedule didnt help. she tried to eat well but she struggled with it a lot, tho she never exactly knew why, she would just very quickly feel full and wouldnt feel hungry untill way too many hours later. she would eat like. 2 small meals a day and maybe some snacks in between.

after: you guessed it she gained weight and is chubbier!!!!!! yayayyaa!!!! i think she would hear others motivate tsukasa to eat better and seeing him want to improve on that motivated her to do the same. because of the low appetite thing she struggled pretty hard at first but with time she managed to figure it out and now eats more and is feeling good!!! this is thanks to mostly emu who would love to bring foods and snacks nene loved so they can share it any time the 2 would hang out, but also thanks to the practices and stamina building she was able to kinda feel like she was burning the unnecessary calories? i imagine she struggled pretty hard when she realized how much weight she put on thinking its a bad thing, but with a lot of support and care from wxs she realized this is way healthier for her than wherever she had going on before!!! she doesnt gain muscle easily tho, so not much of that going on + she does focus more on stamina itself rather than gaining muscle and physical strength

EMU!!!!!

before: chubby, obviously. fat even!!!! definetly overweight and not bothered by it at all! she definetly thinks it makes her look cuter :3 my girl loves foods and snacks and nobody can ruin her mood for those. she also had a fair bit of muscle and liked that its not visible so shes strong but nobody can tell, and she can suprise them with it for funsies

after: still pretty much the same!! tho since she started training and working out even more i imagine a bit of her weight turned into more muscle, so shes even more muscle now!!!! she loves it!!! its still not visible unless she flexes, which makes the muscles pretty prominent and she LOVES jumpscaring people with that because nobody expects it for some reason, despite how athletic she is. besides her arms i imagine her legs are pretty built as well seeing how much she runs, especially from one school to another in a matter of minutes to visit her friend. what can i say my girl loves to eat and run around!!! her love language is soooo sharing a meal with her friends btw. its canon i just know it.

RUIIII!!!!!

before: barely eats doesnt sleep much, just a mess honestly. he doesnt rlly have friends atp and yet still he takes care of others more than he does himself..... needless to say hes tall, lanky, underweight as hell and palest of them all despite not staying inside all that much. lives off of whatever his parents make him if he remembers to eat it and random store bought/school cafeteria foods. malnutrition for sure too like fym u eat no vegetables and ur fine??? bro doesnt even take any vitamins atp to make up for it

after: gained a bit of weight!! hes still skinny because thats just kinda how he naturally is, but hes getting tricked into eating veggies or at least stuff that can replace veggies with the needed nutritions otherwise. he also started taking some vitamins to make up for that too, and despite being naturally pale he did tan a bit!! he still forgets to eat way too often but wxs make up for it with tsukasa always being willing to share his food with him [at times even bringing bigger portions just in case rui needs it] and emu often bringing food to share with them all!!!!

can u tell im a little bit obsessed with gaining weight as a sign of healing. because i am and i love that trope. with the power of love you will stop being underweight and malnourished god bless.

#pjsk #pjsk headcanons #wxs #wonderlands x showtime

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cheap-jumpscare · 2 months

Text

ranting abt being kanade yoisaki.... if ur uncomfy with doubles, scroll away !!!!!!!1

raghhhhh i need white hair and my hair needs 2 be straight n long...... sighs. i already have blue eyes n im already extremely pale so thumbs up but ugh. i shld be skinnier too and that is related :|

i cant tell if im fickin or not but i rlly do wish i looked like. me? ive even always ACTED like me. im just. Kanade Yoisaki. this is the one "just like me fr.." character that's been CONSISTENT.

i was watching a video essay my meowtual Vriska made and SIGHS yeah. its >here< btw pls watch it. very good art and a very cool survey !!

^ but in relation to that I had a mini realization sorta. if i am a kanade fictionkin then i AM just Kanade. there would be no seperation between me and Kanade Yoisaki. if i AM fictionkind then I wouldn't be a "kanade kinnie" id BE kanade. just like how Vriska's whole video is about how fickind tend to suppress their identity to be more palatable. its just so hard to figure out if i AM fickindddd :|

and even then i dont feel like id be exactly like 'canon' me. id be different. id have several traits and such that i always have said I 'headcanon' Kanade with. maybe thats just me bein a bit Sillymode but urghfghg.

im just like i am in the game. i dont go outside regularly because the sun hurts my eyes, bright lights in general suck (though this may just be because my eyes are a lighter color- qwant it its weird), im very serious about music and i do believe it CAN save people, im not very good at personal hygiene and yet inexplicably im considered ~generally~ attractive by, at the very least, my parents. I've mentioned all that before, though. Plus preferring online school.

another thing i want to say bc i feel like it. everytime i see anyone else who's also a character i Am (ex, someone else who's Kanade) i dont ever get bothered. bc my brain rationalizes it through 'multiverse theory.' TL;DR 'doubles' dont bother me because i believe in infinite alternate realities and that if someone else is also kanade then they're just a kanade from an alternate reality. does that make sense?

i still feel a disconnect between the kanade in prosekai and myself- the kanade i am. enough to where i can refer to her in the 3rd person comfortably. im not the same as her. there's differences, I can feel them. ill just refer to Kanade in the game as 'canon!kana'/'canon!me' because that's easiest;

the biggest difference between us is that, well, canon!me is human. she also isn't explicitly trans in any direction, and is also a hard worker. all of that is stuff that doesnt apply. im trans- im queer in every sense of the word. every inch of my identity is a little weird, a little 'out of the norm.' No part of me can be easily described to a lot of people. I do know, thankfully, that people in the real world can be accepting. My Nana supports xenogenders and she's in her early 70s. Granted, I am her main source of information on neurodivergency and queer identity, but I'm able to unbiasedly explain terms and gently guide her in the right direction. I would feel safe in admitting I am not human, and do not like physically being so. I'm lazy- admittedly due to depressive symptoms, but I do not like work. I generally just hate having to do physical activity- even just in-general work. The reason I'm almost-failing all of my classes in highschool is because I hate working for more than a few minutes at a time, especially consecutively.

Of course, I will say I am not a person who really experiences delusions. That isn't to say those who do are lesser or that I'm better- it's just a simple fact. I specify that because this is the 'piss on the poor' website. I can seperate my physical body right now as I physically am from my possible fictionkinnity- at this current moment I am (at the very least biologically) not a shapeshifter like I often call myself. I am human, I am biologically a perisex female, etc. I don't like to see myself like that. I am Uta, yes. But Uta isn't a human. Uta is Kanade Yoisaki. Uta is a shapeshifter. In some way or another, I am nonhuman- or otherwise 'different.' I always have been.

idk. im just kanade. i dont properly know what i mean by it, other than. well. I Am Kanade. and that's really all there is to it.lon

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nonuggetshere · 7 months

Text

HI GIRL NEW IDEA BECAUSE I CANT LET FLOWER HAVE A MOMENT OF PEACE

But first, PK finds WL there chatting with Flower outside and ends up joining them, and they ask how Flower's been enjoying the ball

But later PK notices how they don't seem too excited to be around other people, only light up when around people they enjoy spending time with, including them

He goes off somewhere to process it and when WL finds him there he's almost crying

"My wyrm-?"

"My root, I–..."

"What's wrong?"

"...I'm sorry, I... I messed it all up again, I was...so wrong, they- ...they don't hate us, do they? They've been seeking us out all night, they light up when we're near, I...how could have I missed this? It's always just one blunder after another when it comes to them, why did I ever think it was ever alright for us to just- just-"

"...My love, even you can't be perfect. This is the first time we've spent time with them since the accolade, we couldn't have known-"

"Exactly, this is the first time we've paid them attention for months, and just look how happy they were about that! If I had- if we had just taken time to at least get to know them, it would never-"

He's cut off by the sound of the door opening and they look over to see Flower peeking outside, looking for them. He quickly wiped the tears in his eyes away but it seemed they already saw.

"Knight- I'm sorry, have you been looking for us?"

They nod but before either could reply they sign, their hands shaking and with teat hesitation but they still sign to their parents, "Are you alright, sire?"

PK wasn't sure if it was the visible concern or that word that felt like a hot blade being twisted in his chest, "...Mhm, just- taking a short break, the crowds are overwhelming at times and the nobles can be a lot. I'll be fine, we'll return shortly."

"...Do you wish to sit with us?" Their mother asked, "We can go back together, but it's good to catch a breather if you need it."

They pause then come sit by them, just a short distance away. Just enough for the gap to be noticeable yet still close to them.

She smiled, "The night is lovely isn't it?"

They nod and occassionaly glance in concern at their father.

"I like the balls, but I like sitting here in the quiet just as much."

PK looks at Flower, he can't meet their eyes...he looks away and through their bond reaches out to his lade beside him, his voice quiet, "...I don't deserve this concern or their worry... I don't understand why they care enough to stay by our side when..."

"And yet they do. Just appreciate it, my love, we can tackle this after the ball."

Later as they're returning to the ball and Flower is going ahead of them he just lags behind for a bit

"...Do you think they wish to be our child? Do you think they'll..."

And she just smiles sadly at him, "...I hope they do, despite everything..."

They decide they'll talk to them after the ball

But they don't get to, as not long after while they're away from Flower they hear a loud crash and look over just in time to see some nobles had tripped them and they landed on top of the table, taking it crashing down with them. The nobles laugh and taunt them, speaking to them something that neither monarch can quite hear. And PK feels his blood boil.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" PK flies over there in a rage, it takes everything in him not to bare his mandibles and hiss as he puts himself between his child and the nobles

His lady is right behind him, kneeling by Flower's side and carefully helping them up. The way they wobble and nearly fall again makes her concerned

"Oh- your majesties, we were just- they're just some clumsy, we didn't-"

"Do you think I am blind or do you take me for a fucking idiot?! Do not play coy with me, I've seen exactly what happened!"

"Come on," Their mother voice is soft as she holds them up, "He'll handle this, let's get you outside and cleaned up, alright?"

Later, after laying into these nobles and making them clean up the mess they've made, he joins his wife and child outside in the quiet, dark courtyard by the fountain.

They're sitting turned away from him, clutching the shawl in their hands, their cracked mask laying on the ground beside them.

White Lady looks at him, the two of them sharing that same concerned look.

"...How are they?"

"It seems they hit their head but they've healed now, they should be okay."

He let out a light sigh of relief, pulling out his handkerchief he approached them to gently wipe the pieces of food from their now messy and ruined hair, "Fates, look at you..."

A whine escaped them and immediately got both of their parents' attentions

"...Oh..." White Lady gently held their hand, "Your shawl..."

They held the formerly white, delicate fabric, now stained with red wine and ripped in multiple spots, tightly in their grip, their hands shaking as they fought back tears

"...I'm sure we can fix this..." Pale King gently took it from their hands to inspect it and immediately winced, it was really helpless "...Maybe we can sew it up and scrub the stains out. It won't be the same, but-"

"But red wine stains, darling? Wouldn't it be better to just get them a new one?"

"Oh, but all that work they've put into this one..." He looked at them, his heart cracking at the sight, and he gently handed them the shawl back, "...I'm sorry..."

"...It's okay, we'll get you a new one, you could even pick one for yourself. I'm sure you can make it just as beutiful as this one here."

Flower didn't reply, just hugged the shawl close

PK sighed softly and reached out to his lady through their bond as he gently brushed the crumbs of food from Flower's hair with hid fingers, "Love, what outfit did you say they liked second best again?"

"It's hung up by the door, that pretty silver dress with an overcoat."

"I'll go grab it then so they can change, you could try to clean them up a bit and fix their hair while I'm doing that."

The entire time their mother was fixing them up they didn't make a move, but it was clear they were upset. She tried to chat with them but it seemed like no matter what she did they just didn't light up like before. She even takes care to make their hair look even more intricate and beutiful, but they don't even react.

PK eventually makes it back with the dress and they go off to change, but when they return they just sit back down and grab the old shawl, running the fabric between their fingers as they look down. Their parents shared a look then just silently sat down with them, not wanting to leave them alone like this.

...But the nobles were right,

They had no right to be by the queen's and king's side, they didn't deserve this honour. They weren't even a knight, just a guard, a servant. They meant nothing to them, they weren't their child. They were nothing compared to them. Nothing. Just a nuisance, a bother, a mistake. They shouldn't be here, they dind't deserve it. They were just their fathe- the king's mistake, just a blemish on his name, a disgrace they were ashamed of, a traitor, they shouldn't be alive. They were nothing. Nothing compared to the king and queen. How dare they be in their presence? How dare they even think of them as their parents?

They let out a sob.

Then completely broke down. Just a full on loud, ugly crying into the shawl, burying their face in their knees.

The two tried to comfort them, but any attempts at reaching out were met with Flower pushing them away, swatting their hands away, shuffling away from them. They couldn't even look at them.

PK and WL stopped trying yet didn't leave, just sat close by them and kept them company until Flower cried it all out and calmed down.

Once their cries died down to weak, choked up sobs, PK slowly scooted closer to them

He removed the ribbon tbay kept his hair together and carefully reached for their braid, tying it into a little bow

The surprise of it was enough to make Flower completely stop crying and just look at him in surprise and confusion

"I know it's not the same as your shawl, but...this is my favourite ribbon, I always wore it, and I want you to have it now."

#thylacines can talk #faaf au #spooky writes

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sirenofthegreenbanks · 4 months

Note

🪲 Recommend a great fic centered on your favorite character!

cryptid!!!! these are all my personal recommendations for u!!!! fics that made me go “oh i bet cryptid would like that!”. (disclaimer: i do not take responsibility for any clowning involved in the posting of this reply!) im highly recommending them to everyone else as well though <3 hehe

zhou zishu (novel): our softest pieces by northofallmusic. post-canon i think, E. wenzhou fisting fic, its almost a character study that uses sex and fisting to focus on zhou zishu’s introspective journey of self-discovery regarding pleasure and sex. i read that recently and it?? blew my mind a little!?? i know you already know that fic and i know that because i DisCovered u in the comment section!! huehe (i wanted to go and poke u but I Nobly Refrained). im listing it anyyway because?? its so good?? anyways here is another one that i want more people to read, it also blew my mind: Inside Out by CaffeineAddict94, who is a beloved friend of mine and an amazing writer, i dont know, have you heard of them?? <3<3<3 post-canon domestic wenzhou, E, angst. zhou zishu has abandonment issues and copes with it by taking as much of wen kexing inside him as he can. i love how visceral and tangible your descriptions are here, interweaving zhou zishu‘s state of mind with what he experiences in the body!!! okay, im done with dorking around!! <3 i dont read that much novel fic in general and it was a bit tough to come up with a third fic, after my serious proclaimation at the start that this is going to be a personal recommendation list! When the night is quiet by mtkay13. canon divergence, set during the puppet manor arc, E, light angst. introspective, a what-if of the hypothetical scenario that wenzhou get intimate sooner then they do in canon. what does it take for that to happen? i love how MT solves the issue of zhou zishu‘s insecurity and uncertainty regarding the question of wen kexing‘s sincerity, that makes it very canon-compliant, and it has the typical wenzhou push-and-pull when it comes to expressing and baring yourself in your desire! i eat that up like cake

wen kexing (novel): closer by northofallmusic. post-canon i think, E. wen kexing wants to see what happens if he lets zhou zishu top him. feat. implied comphet, self-discovery, switching. the pov alternates between them and it has some amazing things to say about zhou zishu too, but im putting it here because i really love wen kexing‘s handling of the matter. also one of my most favourite wenzhou novel fics!

wen kexing (show): spare me by staringatstars. post-ep36 time-travel fix-it longfic, heavy angst, graphic body horror whump, T. i literally just recced u that!!!! but let me elaborate on it anyway, for everyone else. it has delightfully gore body-horror (mildly but it is there!) and centres fully around wen kexing‘s state of mind after getting yanked back to the past. if u have ever consumed a time-travel media that features someone finding their loved one in the past at a point before they meet, with the present timeline loved one left behind, and thought that this comes very close to a character death, and that just because these are technically the same person u cant just interchange them and call it a day, look no further! this fic explores exactly this situation, with a lot of grief/mourning and hopeless yearning involved. also: horse shenanigans!

here is my second, actual recommendation!! ive been wanting to recc u this fic for a while because i know u like angsty stuff and grief as a theme, and this fic is really really good at these two things, but i also know u have been holding back from reading longfics because of all the oneshots youve been meaning to get through first. but!!! its free-real estate!!! mwahahaha!!!!! Long Away And Far Apart by timetoboldlygo. post-canon time-travel fix-it, heavy angst, grief/mourning, T. zhou zishu doesnt get cured and dies after three years and wen kexing goes back into the past to change events and ensure they both dont have to end up being the people they are, not expecting to ever remeet his a-xu again except for in the afterlife. i loved that even though the premise is that zhou zishu hasnt actually died here, the author really went there and had wen kexing confront this ugly situation of losing zhou zishu (which is graphic, btw) and being forced to live with it, for 100k, before he finds out about it. its just ugly messy graphic grieving and being forced to survive when u just want to die, of building a new life out of the ashes of your old one, and feeling all the feels that brings with it. the new family dynamics between wen kexing and his parents that are automatically altered by this decision are also amazing. i read this fic twice so far, i think, and it made me ugly cry each time

lan wangji: The Roots Grow Riotous by hansbekhart. this is ,, like ,, my go-to fic when someone asks me to recommend mdzs fic (even though its no longer available) and its also the one i immediately think of in terms of lwj-centred pieces that blew me away. recommending this (or, honourably mentioning this) more in general because u already know it. in case someone has a friend who has a copy: modern au magical realism, E, longfic, heavy angst, graphic body mutilation, graphic body horror, grief/mourning, whump. is set in the fashion industry within the united states and focuses on the diaspora experience of being within that fashion industry as a work-related immigrant, especially in terms of race. i love how tangible lan wangji is in this. its really the character study of someone who is entrapped inside themselves and who is very bad at sharing what hurts them on the inside with other people. the magical realism as well as the mentioned body horror has to do with the actual live plants that grow out of lan wangji‘s body, and the graphic body mutilation comes into play when he him rips them out before anyone else can see. youve already said it in your own post, cryptid, the symbolism is amazing here!

here is my second recommendation which has not been removed from the archive. its doesnt have a lot of similarities with Roots but its also a lwj-centred fic i really like. wonder under summer skies by dragongirlG. modern au, cultural identity, E. also maybe light angst, because the topic of cultural identity and diaspora is written with the kind of weight it does have. this focuses on fashion as well but here from the view of an immigrant small business family-run tailor store in chinatown. i loved how this shifting relationship to your own identity, as diaspora, is reflected in lan wangji, clumsily but determinedly kneeling neck-deep into hanfu making and traditional clothing patterns, and in wei wuxian, whom lan wangji attempts to aid in his endeavour of reforging a connection to his long-dead parents. i dont remember more than that, its been a while since i read it, but it was so good!

bug me for fic recs!!!

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alessiasblood · 4 months

Text

BITE TROUGH ME (1) -Paige Bueckers.

Warnings: Explicit suggestive language.

A/N: yall im back wtf???(and obsessed with paige)and ive been waiting to post this for a while, i hope you like it!!Thank you for all the likes on my previous post it means a lot to me i promise and this one is gonna hit very hard this is the first part!enjoy xoxo!!! 💗

You studied very much for this exam and and you were trying to give the best out of you today. You were aware that if you didnt pass, you'd repeat the year and it was unpleasant.

You pulled back the glasses on your nose and you started desperately chewing on your pencil. Minutes went by more faster, but you blocked on the last exercise, being the most important. You took a quick glance towards one of your friends, Michael, who almost solved the entire test and Maeve, who was in the same situation as you.

"y/n! Are you trying to cheat?I think you really dont want to graduate!"

You hated your biology teacher more than anything in this world. She was standing in your way of going to a summer vacation instead of returning to rise up your grades. She rushed towards you, picking up your paper and inspecting it for a brief moment.

"You failed. You're free to leave"

You were furious, you studied extremely hard for this exam and took you multiple stay at home weekends with your textbooks open and she had the guts to do such thing. You qucikly picked up your bag and went outside. You went to sit on a bench near the freshly cut grass, trying to calm down. The school yard was full, people were on the basketball field inside, you could see it trough the windows, and the ball hitting the ground multiple times.

"Hey Y/n!What are you doing here?" A voice behind me says. As i turn around my roomate Maeve, sat down next to me on the bench. Despite being best friends, you and Maeve were very different. In all aspects. Her bright crimson hair was shining in the sunlight as it was only noon. You didnt necesarilly follow all her negative influences, plus, she was nice and friendly, to you and to everyone, but her friend group wasan't exactly the best. You didnt like partying, Maeve was more care free, you admired her pretty much.

"She failed me. I cant get into the final exam now, i wont do anything!" You whined.

"Dont say that girl, im here for you" She rubbed your back gently, smiling, you took notice of her nose piercing.

"I think that you should totally go with us tonight, you know, Micahel and I, its friday, you have the entire weekend to overthink this." She chuckles, and you cant help but chuckle too. You always refused her invitations, she would always go to that damned frat house, it was full of smoke, drunk people and creeps, too loud and it made you uncomfortable ever since the first time you had been dragged there, you wouodnt have looked forward to it again, not unless Maeve was begging you to come along with them, Michael, her boyfriend was okay, but the rest of her friends usually were full of themselvs and you were a target.

As soon as you reach your dorm you jumped on the bed hesistating to ever leave it again. But Maeve informed you Michael was going to be here to pick her up, well in this case, the both of you. Your mind quickly filled with thoughts, about how you wont graduate like other of your friends and even Maeve who barely goes to any classes still managed to get good grades. Your thoughts dissapeared as a puf of smoke when Maeve voices rises

"Did you hear me?" She smiles

"Sorry....what?" You had not realized your mind wandered

"I said help me pick an outfit" Her wardrobe was majority black, and innapropiate, she pulls out a black dress, at least the bottom is solid but you get the feeling that she would have wore it even if it wasan't.

"You know you cant wear that!" She points out at your white pleaded skirt and pink cardigan

"Whats wrong with it?" You defend your outfit. She was kinda judging you because you wore light colors and soft clothes but you still listened to rock.

"Its just more for....a garden party with unicorns and cotton candy." She laughs "Can i help you?" She pulls out a tight black top that had cape sleeves and it wasant actually your style, but you thought it would look decent with some jeans or a skirt.

"Oh and it definitely goes with this" She shows me a black pleated skirt and you instantly smile "Well i can always go with pleated skirts" You laugh.

After what feels like ages, you finally pull up to the same huge two story house, even to this day, you still didnt know who owned this house.

"How many people will be here?" You ask, but still knowing in the back of your head thaf is going to be the same as it always it and you got used to it.

"A full house, hurry up" Michael answers getting out of the car and being the first to walk in.

The smome fills your lungs as you try to make your way trough the crowd, where Maeve greets a group of girls, you awkardly stand behind her, waiting for her to finish being popular.

"Y/n, you heard of huskies right?" She turns to you, smiling still. You quickly nod.God you hated introductions, but you knew very well the only team of basketball. A blond girl leaned against the kitchen counter, talking to another girl, she takes a qucik glance at you untill she places the red cup down and walks towards you.

"Paige" she shakes her hand with you. You notice her checking you out but she doesnt sketch any expression on her face.

"What are you studying?" She continued, looking down at you, she made you feel small.

"I am an English major" You quietly answer, even tough it was not loud enough over the loud music. You made out what you could call a sligth smile on her face untill she turns away.

"My friend y/n here just failed biology" Maeve says, faking out to be sad.

"Not good at biology" Azzi backs up

"I think Paige knows the bones and all?" Maeve laughs, she made Paige laugh too, you found the entire situation strange. You didnt want anyones help

"i could always help one of my friend's friend" The way she said friend's friend stuck up to you a bit. You looked away trying to act all cool.

"Oh im good" You try to smile friendly.

You quickly glance around the room, full of people, untill you spot a familiar face, which you rapid recognized, Bryce. You wave to him smiling, gesturing to approach you. You earned some weird gazed from the girls, they somehow knew your friend. Bryce was one of them, he greets Micahel on his way untill he reaches up to you.

"Y/n!And...hello ladies" He smirks, Paige looks away trying to contain her laugh.

He drags you aside out of the situation and you're thankful .

"Whats up with you and Alex?" You ask him

"I broke up with him. You think im staying after his ass?No, no, no."

"I think you're gonna drag us again with your dad's truck to that damned gay club?" You say laughing louder than usual, you catch a glimpse of Paige you couldnt make out what was she feeling but she did hear you.

You refused to drink anything all night, despite Maeve drunken voice begging you to shove something down your throat, you only took two shots, even tho your broked your promise. The same Paige finds your familiar face

"You still need help with biology?" She says, but not even a sligthly emotion breaks trough her face. You were a bit skeptic of this Paige, but you were trying to focus only on the good parts of what her help could have offered you.

"If that doesnt bother you" You gained your composure.

"Oh its not bothering me" She mutters, with the same serious expression for a moment, untill you earned a qucik smile.

"And....how do you suggest we do this?" You ask softly looking ahead

"Anywhere you want, no payback, whenever im free i'll tell you" She says, then grabs a piece of paper and a pen and writes down a number "For you" She hands it out to you, for a quick moment thoughts filled your mind, analyzing if this is actually her being nice or its someting else, but you did take it.

#paigebucekers #uconn

#Spotify

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