probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
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Marcille wants you to think she's the normal sensible one, the straight man to everyone else's bizarre shenanigans. But no. She's just as much of a social outcast freak as the rest of her party and that's why she's my favorite
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Alright so I fucking love any of the Robins interacting with the rouge gallery. Like Poison Ivy just fucking sighing at Dick's plant related jokes because it's been 4 fucking years when will he get new material and Two face just loving the irony of fucking with Jason because he's the second Robin, but one that has been on fucking tumble dry in head is Tim and Cat Woman, not Tim as stray or any form of relation outside mask, just Cat woman and Robin
And like maybe Batman and Robin are at this museum because Bruce knew that she would stir up shit soon because there's a shit ton of jewels on display and like Selina is actively picking up this big fucking ruby unaware that Batman and Robin are about to make their debut with a lecture but Tim!Robin yells with the most indignant voice Bruce had ever heard
"YOU CANT STEAL THAT"
and like the entire illusion of mystique is loss and Batman is just baffled because what the fuck Tim
and like Selina is also fucking baffled because, what?
And like Tim is like floundering because how the fuck does he explain without showing his hand, but then he just says fuck it, and he starts striding towards Cat Woman, lecture ready
"You can't steal that, Drake industries funded the stealing of that 7 years ago from the country of Morroco, it was important to an ancient civilization there and the local museums were desperate for it"
He spit this all out rapid fire continuing his stride towards Catwoman and taking a breath before continuing "BUT, Drake industries is under new management and the current acting CEO is working to return influential artifacts stolen from their cultures", he finished this while reaching Catwoman and plucking the ruby from her dumbfounded hand and placing it back on display, before proceeding to point at four other artifacts and finishing off lamely with "those too"
He then walked back over to stand at Batman's side. He may have baffled Batman beyond belief, but hey, he gained Catwomans respect
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well, I can't say I expected the new chapter to feature Idia (metaphorically) going to (metaphorical) hell, getting a pep talk from his (metaphorical) Phantom brother which helps him finally move on once and for all from his brother's death, and (metaphorically) overblotting again to fight his way back out of (metaphorical) hell, only to have his darkest fear (non-metaphorically) come true when his mom goes through his computer and finds all his secret files. but I am glad it did!
also this is all a flashback for the purpose of explaining to our group what the heck is going on (whether or not any of it is getting through is another matter)
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