#idk if im very Good at it but i have p clear ideas of how characters look in that respect u kno…..

[saintbleeding]

Art trademark: I don’t know enough about art language to be super detailed, BUT—your lines!! The way you shape lines in a character’s body is v distinctive and whenever I see it, I’m like OH THATS SAINT

CRIES!! i love this thank u,,,

[viixenvi]

𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥 | 18+

Summary: You friend drags you to a celebrity house party since she's a famous influencer. You get very bad anxiety and hide in the master bedroom, unbeknownst to you, Mitch comes up to get away from his party and finds you in his room. And God, does he like the way you look on his bed.

Characters: Famous!Mitch Rapp x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Oral (fem receiving), makeouts, pet names (baby, love), Mitch is drunk, Reader is tipsy, Reader receives mostly, p in v penetration (no sex), cockwarming

A/N: Not proofread or edited! also I tried something different with cockwarming, idk if yall will like it but oh well. I'm trying a lot of new things with coming up fics! (possible pt 2 where we get rough Dom!Mitch?)

𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐃𝐍𝐈

As much as you loved your best friend, she never seemed to understand that you hated parties. Nevertheless, you always went with her when she invited you. Mostly just to look out for her.

Here you were, at a celebrity's house party in LA. Its funny, you don't recognize a single person you've seen so far. Leah, your best friend, took shots with you and you ended up losing her in the crowd.

As the party grew larger, you got more anxious. You'd much rather be home, in the comfort of your own home. You were now tipsy and made yourself upstairs carefully.

It was less crowded upstairs but still not quiet enough for you. You slowly made your way down the hall and to the only room that seemed to be closed.

You walk right in, shutting the door behind you and sitting down on the bed. Your clothes felt uncomfortable now, so you pulled off your shirt. You are left in a bralette and skirt.

"God, why do I say yes to her," you groan to yourself, laying back onto the bed. You stare at the ceiling, there is nothing there but it seems more interesting then the party outside of the room.

The music is so loud that you don't even hear the door open or close. Mitch is staring at you for a few seconds, soaking in your looks, before he says anything.

You are startled by the clearing of his throat and you jump up. He chuckles and sits on his bed, opposite of you. "What are you doing here?" You question.

"I can't come to my own room?" he jokes, you blush a little in embarrassment and look at the ground.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't know this was your house."

"I should ask you why you are here actually," he turns to look at you, smiling. You cant look away from his eyes. He's gorgeous.

"I just got anxiety out there. I'm not the party type, especially celebrity parties," you laugh, picking at your finger. Mitch nods and looks away from you for a moment.

"Yea, I didn't even want to host this party. My manager thought it would be good to announce my newest movie. I'm Mitch by the way."

"I'm Y/n, it's nice to meet you. Are you an actor?" you shake his hand. His look seems to linger on your chest and you almost forget you are in a bralette that is mostly see through.

"Yea, I guess I am," Mitch chuckles. You have no idea that he's one of the biggest actors currently and he seems to like that. It's refreshing to him.

You look down and only now realize how you look. You scramble to find your shirt and cover up your chest. "Oh I'm so sorry! It just got so hot in here!"

Mitch shakes his head and slowly pulls away the shirt. "Nothing to be ashamed of, you are beautiful," your shit is disregarded on the floor and Mitch is now close enough that you can smell the alcohol on him.

You can't even stop to think before you push your lips onto his. Suddenly you are on his lap and his hands are running down your body.

"Fuck. I can't believe im doing this," You whisper against his lips. He chuckles and flips you over so your back is on the bed. He kisses your neck, moving his hands to unclip your bralette.

You pull it off and he stops just to stare at you. "You're beautiful, baby." He continues kissing down your body. You almost shiver at the kisses he placed right at your hips.

His fingers hook at the top of your skirt and he taps your hips. "Up." You push your lower body up and he pulls the skirt off easily.

Your hands are on his hair the moment he starts kissing you again. He presses both hands to your thighs and pushes them open, pulling you to the edge of the bed.

He doesn't hesitate before pushing his face against your pussy. His tongue swirls against you and you bite back moans that ultimately make their way out.

He hums at your pleasure, enjoying all the noises you are making. You press his head down more and he doesn't seem to care.

"Fuck!!" you moan out, letting go of his hair and gripping the sheets instead. There's a hot feeling in your stomach and the pressure builds up heavily.

"Go ahead, cum for me baby." Your legs shake, pushing together on his head as you cum.

It feels so good you almost see white for a moment. Mitch continues to lick your clit after you cum and it may be the most heavenly think you have felt.

When he finally pulls away, his face is covered in your juices. He smiles at you, and you want to kiss him so badly for how sexy he looks.

You don't hesitate pulling him in for a kiss, making him climb on the bed. His hands run up your body, pinching your nipples. Pleasure courses through your body and you moan into the kiss.

"I need you," You whisper out, he pulls away from the kiss. He moves away for a moment, pulling the rest of his clothes off. You can't stop staring at his cock.

You reach over to give him a handjob but he pushes your hand away gently. "Shh. I want to fuck you when I'm sober." You nod, moving to grab your clothes but he stops you. "I never said I wanted you to leave, pretty girl," he says, pulling your back to his chest. He pulls the blanket over you two.

"What are you doing?" you ask when you feel his cock press against your hole. He chuckles and pushes himself into you, causing you to moan.

"Just gettin' warm. Go to sleep, baby."

[quirklessidiot]

title: Y/N and her boys [sneak peek] pairing : Upper classman/popular kid!Gojo Satoru x F!reader, Exchange student!Eren Jaeger x F!reader, MMA Fighter/Celebrity!Ryomen Sukuna x F!reader, Childhood Bestfriend!Aki Hayakawa x F!reader, Varsity football player!Itoshi Rin x F!reader (use of she/her pronouns) Genre: Alternate Universe-University setting, romance, fluff, angst (if you squint), slice of life, drama, all cliche romance genres unite! (Based on the Manhwa, Bunny and her Boys)

Summary: Y/N’s denied the existence of pretty boys and god forbid she’d ever end up dating one yet with one horrid break-up, she decides that relationships aren’t just meant for someone stupid like her but the problem is — five of them suddenly appear and god, why does it seem like they can’t get enough of her?

General warning for the story: mild sexual content, cliche tropes (help), mahito is his own warning, minor character death, mentions of depression, a lot of second-hand embarrassment from y/n's part (shes not a cool girl, SHE IS A BUBBLING MESS AND THATS OK <33), insecurities, bullying, and mentions of cheating Notes: english isn't my first language! (dont judge me) this multi-chaptered story will probably be 20-30 chapters (idk) in ao3. you can totally tell this story is rooted from self-indulgence LMFAO. Im not sure if i should cross post it but im leaning towards ao3 more either ways, can't wait to release this on friday!

also can u guess who she ends up with :P rb’s are appreciated yay FULL VERSION IS RIGHT HERE!

SNEAK PEAK

“Maybe…Maybe we should break up.”

There's another round of silence between you two, and you know that you can’t exactly take it back anymore since you had said it loud and clear, “Woah, woah, I told you I wasn’t with Misa.” his voice turns louder, and the background noises are good as gone as if he had left the noisy place, “Where are you? I’m coming to get you-”

“I said,” you try to control the stammering of your voice, trying to avoid the stares of the people who cast odd glances, “We’re done. I don’t want to see or hear from you again.” and before he could let another excuse out of his mouth, you end the call. It is only now that you notice how your legs have been quivering and your mouth has gone dry, seemingly like a pup who had just been born and trying to walk. You lose your footing and sit down on the dirty pavement.

No tears were shed at that very moment, probably because you were only stupefied, and it was written clearly on your face that this wouldn’t be something you’d recover anytime soon. Heck, you couldn’t even grasp the idea entirely that someone you’ve been friends with for years and, eventually, a lover would do that to you.

Was it as easy as a snap of a finger?

“Miss? Miss?” someone calls out, but it only bounces back to him like an echo in a cave. You remain still, eyes blinking rapidly while the rest of your face is slack. Everyone around you continued to move, but you remained there like a decorated statue.

“Miss? Christ, you’re about to be–” the husky voice also stops, and it’s only now that you look up to find a man. He seems stocky but, simultaneously, smaller, as if he didn’t want to come off as intimidating when he maintained eye-to-eye contact. 

He is incongruous with everyone who walks by since he desperately tries to hide his features with a baseball cap and a dark face mark. The only thing you can see are strands of his bleached hair, his eyes that resemble the sunshine that peeked through the glasses of whiskey, and the swirls of ink becoming visible underneath his coat when he stretches out his arm.

If this were any other day, you’d run in the opposite direction because he looked like an unscrupulous loan shark, but your body remains in a state of unknown fatigue that you just wanted to stay still. 

You watch as his face softens, the lines on his forehead somewhat disappearing when he watches the color bleed from your face. “...Alright…” he stops, squinting as he crouches to your level. His thick thighs encompass the rough expanse of his straight jeans, and you wondered if he had been an athlete or something. Aside from his built, his presence was rather invigorating,  “oh…” he continues, “Sorry, you-uh…” The confidence he had to throw you off is gone like the evening dust as he motions his index finger up and down his face.

At that moment, you feel something wet running down your cheek. It seemed like the waterworks were late.

You didn’t want to be a pity party in front of anyone, and you’d expect there to be only bystanders, not ‘good samaritans’.

You sniffled, violently wiping the tears away as you felt your ribs were too tight when you took one long breath, “I’m fine…” you respond monotonously.

Who were you even fooling? 

“Right…” you carefully watch him take out a handkerchief, “Fine, sitting on a dirty pavement near my car doesn’t make you look fine, Miss.” he prodded.

“Well, what do you care, anyways?” you tried to keep your voice from cracking, but the stranger showed no qualms of anxiety or fear, nor did he seem mad at your snappy attitude. The blue handkerchief is laid on his palm, waiting for you to take it, yet you exhibit no signs of accepting his kindness. Instead of forcing you through like the usual status quo, he returns it to his pockets.

The odd man.

“Well, for one, I don’t want to run your feet over since I’m parked over here,” he thumbs towards the black jeep that’s parked in front of you, “And my mom didn’t raise me to leave a girl sitting alone, crying her eyes out…”

“Well, did your mom tell you to mind your own business, as well?” your body remains heavy and distant from the stranger, not minding if it came off as rude, but you’ve always been wary of them, especially the ones who claimed to be nice. You wouldn’t be swayed even if you were in a vulnerable place.

He sucks in a deep breath, quite surprised that you had the energy to exchange a vehement response to him. Weren’t you just about to bawl your eyes out?

“Well, you honestly looked like you deserve some niceness after whatever happened.” he conceded, remaining suspiciously friendly, “Piece of advice, though, if it’s a guy, he’s not worth it.” 

“I-what makes you think it’s a guy?” there it goes again, the unknown tightening of your throat and the way the gummy lids on your eyes would heat up as if a pipe of water was about to burst and flood the segways any moment.

“It’s always an asshole who doesn’t seem to know how to treat a woman right.” he lamely explains, and slowly but hesitantly, as if he was waiting for you to move away, he places one hand on top of your hand. 

Unlike a while ago, you weren’t as hostile, but you were confused about why the stranger suddenly did this and didn’t seem to tilt away like you usually would, “So go home tonight, Miss. Cry it out and wake up tomorrow for yourself. You’ll be fine.”

You don’t even see his entire face, but the way he gently caresses your hair as if you were a long-time friend had your lips quivering, and without even realizing it, your torso bends forward. You bury your face in your arms, finding solace in your makeshift fetal position.

The stranger says nothing more; honestly, you didn’t even mind. His newfound presence is comforting.

[ty-bayonet-betteridge]

Gimme directors commentary for Two Liars Lying To Eachother please!

its been a while since ive thought about this fic in any capacity lksajdaskdfld lets see if it still holds up! directors commentary for chapter 1, i'll be doing the others separately later :D

Each of his hands was cuffed to one of the table's legs, somewhat restraining his motion. He hated it; he preferred being able to fidget.

autism edgar but this also isnt the sort of autism i tend to see him as having? idk the idea of edgar stimming is very weird to me

That was a somewhat good sign. He took another glance at the large, mirrored wall of the room, which he had no illusions was reflective on the other side. The only question was whether anyone was in the viewing room to catch his knowing glances.

theres an XKCD about how fun it is to occasionally announce "i know you're listening" to an empty room, because if you're wrong nobody will ever know and if you're right it will freak the HELL out of them. thats basically what Mustardseed is doing here.

According to Michael, he had traded himself in to the compound in exchange for catching Mustardseed - for catching me, Edgar thought, smiling faintly.

seamless exposition, me. i had to establish that this Edgar was Mustardseed, but the narration is roughly tied to his view of things, and Mustardseed doesn't think of himself as Mustardseed, just as Edgar, so the narration couldn't call him Mustardseed.

The door swung open and in came Ty Betteridge. He was a few years older than the last time Edgar had seen him, back when he'd killed him inside of Tier Two on the night Base was formed,

...wasn't that Hunter? or did it become Edgar that killed young!Ty in the post-72 timeline? i am confuse

Well, I appreciate making me feel like a criminal after you plucked me out of the middle of my normal day.

hes so bitchy and for what?

If you're worried about unpredictability, why does the cowboy get to roam free? He's been rather hard to keep under control, in my experience.

i wanted to make it clear just how bitter Edgar is towards all members of Base, so of course five seconds into this conversation he tries to fuck Michael over

Ty's grin was somewhat predatory.

this fic is 90% me looking for different ways to describe smiles. Ty and Mustardseed are both very smiley.

They called you OVEdgaR,

i think im the only person who capitalizes ovedgar that way

"With my husband, yeah." Edgar smiled and raised his left hand to show off the simple wedding band. "Mm. Congrats. Mike told me he wasn't married to you, how odd."

I FORGOT HOW DISMISSIVE TY SOUNDED HERE. he cares of course but

Base Mike and Edgar aren't married.

i try to be very precise about the names characters use for each other, because i think its a very quick way to characterize relationships. Mustardseed always refers to them as "Base Mike" and "Base Edgar", while Ty refers to them as just Mike and Edgar, or possibly Mikey and Edgar, depending on context.

"Hm. You're much less trouble than the Mikes; each one of them ties so much into their name. It's a little exhausting keeping track of them, to be honest." "Well, I never really had trouble with it, but I suppose it is easier if you care about him." Edgar smiled like he hadn't just thrown out the barb. Ty laughed. "I care about Mike Walters more than you can imagine, Panther." Ty grinned, waiting to see if Edgar would respond to the pet name. Edgar kept his face neutral and pleasant.

Edgar definitely won that exchange :P its important to me that Edgar feels like he's in control of the conversation even though he very clearly isnt in control of the situation, because that's the vibe he gave off in ep 84.

Moving on… you established a campaign of terror against Mike's base in an attempt to free yourself and your… husband… from their control. Is that right?

Ty is reading these questions off his clipboard and the prompt on it didnt say "husband," it said "OVER Mike." HOWEVER the pause before saying it was something Ty probably did deliberately to keep up his veneer of indifference.

"I'd rather not put Michael through any more undue stress. He's had a hard couple of days, especially with all the strain you've been putting on him."

this is so funny to me, because it IS another barb, but its also sort of Ty trying to guilt-trip Edgar like thats gonna work??? :P

I have a lot of sympathy for Michael too, but as far as I know, he's never had anyone threaten him at gunpoint to stay in Base.

i'll be honest, he probably has. Michael's seen some shit

"I am sorry for your situation, Edgar, I really am. But you do keep pulling me away from the questions, and the sooner we get these done, the sooner we can get you out of those cuffs and moved to your quarters."

this is a very Ty Betteridge thing to say. like yeah, im sorry that YOU keep delaying me from getting you comfortable. hes so...

So he was listening when Michael and I were talking.

reading it back, i feel like i didnt give the audience enough credit. they probably could have picked up on these little jabs and maneuvering tactics without me having to point them out. anyway yes, ty is doing this interview only half for actual information gathering reasons, the other half is just to waste edgars time as a form of basic psychological warfare

Your Base may be rudimentary, but I believe that you are a smart man, Edgar.

i keep pointing out the little jabs and not having much to say about them, but theyre still so good to me. "i know all your friends are stupid but i didnt think you were too"

"Sometimes smart people do dumb things in the heat of passion." "And is that the only reason you made those thirty-two duplicates?" "It's the only reason I'm going to be telling you."

i'll be honest, i have no idea what i was hinting at here. i think canon at one point suggested there might have been an ulterior motive to the Mustardseed escapees, but i didn't make any sort of plan for what that might be. if i had to retroactively justify it, i'd say Mustardseed's future scouting told him that the escapees would be consolidated into MW, and that MW's existence was important to his plans somehow.

"I've got all day, Ty." Edgar smiled across the table, a smile that didn't reach his eyes.

i just ctrl+f'ed and the word "smile" appears 7 times in this 1k word chapter.

[hertwood]

👀😈🧠👩‍🏭???

👀 Do you have any WIPs that you would never let see the light of day? If yes, what are they about?

i have several fic ideas that have just petered out and i'm resigned to not finishing. it's not about not sharing them, it's about making peace with never finishing them. (i also have several fics i havent touched in months but im DETERMINED to get back to but that's a separate problem.)

one of those is, sadly, femdomverse 3 (and everything else i had planned). i have shared bits and pieces about it before, and it was going to be called "points present" bc she leaves a pair of her underwear as a ~treat~ for getting his first points ladkfjasldkfjaslkjf

i think my big problem with femdomverse was just down to teething problems. i wrote fdv1 on impulse in under 24hrs, i dont think i would've even finished fdv2 if i wasn't trapped in my appt with covid (thanks covid.) it sorta grew into a much larger idea than it started as and trying to figure out planning it out once i was already in the middle of it. i think it was a good lesson for really taking the time to think out longer projects fully before i post anything in the future.

but fdv still has such a place in my heart and its spirit lives on in my other girlfics!!!!

😈 Is there anything you enjoy doing that you think your readers hate?

this is such an interesting question because i spend very little time thinking about this. i write what i wanna write and if yall like it thats just a bonus :P new ask game tell me things i do as a writer you find annoying??? lol i suppose one thing i do a lot is talk about fics and just not get them finished or posted in a reasonable amount of time. WHICH ANNOYS ME TOO TO BE FAIR. idk. let me know~

🧠 What’s an idea you have that you can’t quite call a WIP yet?

ooooooh gio for u. as a treat. i'll talk abt my sargewood fic idea. this doesn't really count as a wip yet bc i haven't written anything yet, BUT circling back to the first one, planning out longer forms fics is important for me in the writing process. i've only talked abt this with care in DMs so i guess this is its first proper public sharing.

so, it's an au where kyle never really got into racing, he and logan knew each other in carting but kyle's career petered out and he and logan fell of of touch. for logan, his career progresses as we know it irl, until he gets dropped at the end of the 2024 season and he ends up without any sort of drive, goes back to florida in a sort of career limbo. and runs into kyle again!!!!!

but!!!!! surprise!!!! kyle's a dad! (this was all thought up around this btw. i was like how do i make singledad!kyle as a concept into an actual story with substance.) kyle and a high school ex had a baby, kyle realized he was gay so they broke up, she's very very smart and got into law school or smth so she's off doing smart businesswoman shit and kyle is the primary parent who gets child support. (amicable coparenting!!! just to be clear!!!!)

so with all of logan's new free time he can spend all this time with kyle and his kid to the point where lines start to blur and he now has all this free time to unpack any feelings that might pop up. writing a chaptered fic would be so so daunting but i think it'd be a good challenge for me, i just rly need to sent aside time to rly work on outlining everything i want!

👩‍🏭 If one of your fics was going to get you arrested, which one and why?

i'm not quite sure how to answer this question aldfjaslfjasldfja i'm big on. feeling morally neutral abt the fiction we all write. HOWEVER i do know that like, oscarmark is ~controversial~ and i do have this wip. that i havent touched in a while but i love the concept so much i still rly want to get back to at some point. the wip actually predates fdv and i originally was like 'oh i'll just anon post it i'm too embarassed' but now any embarassment abt the wierd shit i write is GONE lmao. i did talk abt it in the replies of this post and thats the most i've said about it before. it's really just a contrived silly little plot all just to set up oscar being fucked over the side of a boat. which is public sex technically which is also a crime. its v self indulgent its very For Me i hope i can take it out of wip purgatory someday :'(

[anothersebastianblog]

So you agree that Dahmer and Blonde were exploitative and gross but you still support p&t? please explain, how is it any different? I'm not even being snarky, just genuinely asking.

Mind you that this is the last time i talk about this simply because we are over this era and im not interested in talking about it now again! So it’s gonna be a long one 😁 im replying this because if you are new you could have missed the p&t talking.

So, no. I don’t fully support any of these projects.

But I think here we have three different but similar situations:

1. Blonde. The easiest one. One of the worst movie ever made. It’s genuinely bad under every aspect, even the more technical ones: directing and writing. Ana’s performance is half good half a parody (and she didn’t even sing herself..) but the rest is so awful that she managed to be the best part of the movie.

Blonde is based on a FICTIONAL book about a dead woman that can’t reply or express her opinion anymore and that has been the subject of thousands of projects now. It’s directed by a man and you can fucking tell it. It contains a pro-life campaign and a first p.o.v blowjob scene. The story in general is not accurate because again the book is fictional

2. Dahmer. From a technical perspective is good. You lie if you say it is not. Ryan Murphy can do his job well especially if the stuff he has in his hands is depraved and about real people (probably because he actually is not a great screenwriter). Evan did his job very well.

Sadly everything else was wrong. Idk who actually thought it was a good idea to make this series tbh. This time the victims’ families ACTUALLY loudly complained about the series and the fact that seeing themselves portrayed onscreen made the re-live the trauma.

It was also labelled under the “LGBT+” tag on Netflix (to be clear this tag is also applied to series like Heartstopper). Now. Do you think a black gay man would enojy to see Dahmer, a series found under the “LGBT+” tag on Netflix?

Last but not the least … actually the most important point: the victimisation of Dahmer. Choosing to show him as a baby and a child and the problem his parents had as a sort of justification of his crimes…

(And at these stuff can we add the absolute imbecility of the people who glamorised that criminal, treated him like and idol, made his “halloween costume” go sold out, etc?)

3. Pam and Tommy. Pam and Tommy seems a fucking joke compared to the previous two. It has its huge problems, to me the most important one is how they handled the press tour (bad) and Sebastian himself who should have shut is pretty mouth up. Lily too tbh.

For the rest , it’s a well made series with great musics and great performances. It actually stands by the two victims while showing you one of them was (at least at the time) a bad person. (Mind you that the series was about the sex tape being stolen not their marriage issues, some people didn’t get that). The impact on Pamela is so big that you can’t justify Seth Rogen’s character at the end of it which is good.

Thank god Pamela can say her version: she actually had a documentary in works for two years before the series was released… on the same platform who produced Dahmer. Oh the irony.

On a less ironic note, of course she has the right of saying whatever she wants. She is capitalising on it as well (good for her)

One thing I didn’t like about this is how people were so so quick on defending her without knowing how a bad person she is… and treated sebastian (just him… the other people who worked on it apparently get a pass) like he is the devil or something. While of course he did some mistake im convinced some reaction were a bit too much

[twonderland]

☆*:.｡ NRC HAS A MAID CAFE ?!? .｡.:*☆

Note: sooo this is my first writing ! Omg I’m so nervous I have never written for any fandom before but I wish this goes well 🙏🏻😂 anyway, hope y’all like it and if you have any thoughts about it pls comment I would really appreciate it ☺️💖💖

Summary: NRC was organizing a school festival to attract new students and also to let the guys have a day of fun and chill. However the dorm leaders were out of ideas while deciding what activities they were gonna have, until you decided to talk about some options of what your school used to do in this kind of events (before coming to twisted wonderland), most of those activities were really alike to what NRC already had, except one thing ...

- when you mentioned that in your “dimension” there was different options that could be introduced in NRC at the festival he was actually pretty interested. Obviously he would have to make some changes so that “activities” could fit in Heartslabyul rules but, he never thought that he could have the opportunity to see you in such an ... outfit.

- Who does he think he can fool ? He’s a blushing mess and can’t even look at you in the face. How can he ? The moment you got out of your room with that white coping, that really short skirt, and oh god the stockings

- You look so cute and obedient and hfkogkebdiej

- The plan was simple, you were a “maid” and the boys attending the clients at your side were butlers, easy ! Except from the part of talking to you

- He’s angry because he can’t believe that such an outfit has this power over him and he thinks “god Riddle get yourself together and just talk to her about the menu” but somehow you think he’s angry for some strange reason since he tends to get all red face when he is angry (poor bean he’s trying his best to not collapse)

- HE’S A GENTLEMAN ! HE DIDNT HAVE SUCH A HARD UPBRINGING FOR NOTHING !! he goes with a straight face to your direction and then .... “(y/n) ! Have you learn your lines ?! Customers need the best of attention from this establishment !!” (Riddle this is just a classroom turned into a maid cafe, chill)

- “Ah sure Riddle-senpai, just look *you clear your throat* Welcome home master !!”

- Riddle.exe has stopped responding

- what ? A maid cafe ? Isn’t it just like the rest of the maids at his palace in Afterglow Savana ? He’s used to being attended by this kind of servitude at his homeland but he had never seen Classic or French (I leave that to your imagination ☺️) maid style

- He thinks “ohoho this can be quit interesting” and has that smug smirk in his face, OF COURSE he’s gonna take this opportunity to tease you

- However after he sees you in that cute and tempting outfit, for a little moment (just a little moment) he doesn’t want to admit it he goes shy, stops just a moment to admire you from head to toe in your outfit, you go like “what? “ and then he just shrugs it out just in time before you notice “hmph are you some kind of panda ?”

- Seems like he doesn’t care but actually you never get out of his view, he drinks his woman respect juice every morning but not the rest of the students

- If he sees that some idiot gets a little too close to you he may roar from across the cafe and shoot some killing glares to those idiots and problem solved

- Don’t get it wrong, he’s still Leona and may slide the tip of his tail under your skirt a little ... just a little 😏

- He listens to all your descriptions of the activity of the maid cafe, takes notes and adds some good ideas so everything’s on point

- He’s pretty chill the majority of the time while preparing everything, he even helped you to practice your lines so you could attend customers with the best training !

- Until ... he saw you in character. It was kind of a self goal since he told you to not get out of character when you wear your uniform, how fool and unfortunate (lucky) soul he was

- “Ashengrotto- sama ? I had some doubts about the menu ...” “yes ? (Y/...n)”

- his glasses break

- Azul.exe has stopped responding x2

- His mind can’t process all the things that are going on, you , on a cute really really short skirt, calling him “sama” with your innocent voice, and OH LOOK AT THAT

- THIGHTS

- he didn’t know he had a thing for thights until this day

- Tries to solve all your doubts without stuttering but fails miserably

- Thinks really seriously in a way to make you sign a contract where you accept to wear that outfit whenever you visit octavinelle (azul that’s practically impossible but ok try 😂)

- OMG A MAID CAFE ?! It’s foreign and interesting !! This guy is all in after you finish to talk about your idea

- Kalim is also used to being all pampered and having hundreds of people attending him at all times so he’s really curious about what is the difference between what he knows and what you know

- You tell him that is nothing too awesome, but is more to have fun in getting into character of “master and servant” BUT NOTHING IS BORING IF YOU ARE IN IT he tells you that you don’t need to worry and he just wants to participate in the experience

- He doesn’t assist as a butler but like a customer, and the night before the event he can’t sleep from the excitement, “Jamil, how do you think is a maid ?” “Idk Kalim sleep now” “ne~ ne~ Jamil do you think that (y/n) will call me master? tehehe” “OMG KALIM ENOUGH” poor Jamil he also couldn’t get enough sleep that night

- He’s one of the first clients to arrive and oh god ... when he finds you. He doesn’t know what is it with that uniform that it makes you look ADORABLE AND BEYOND also ... kind of .... ?? (Sexy kalim the word you look for is sexy) he just doesn’t know how to react the very first seconds but doesn’t last long until

- “Kalim-sama ! Welcome back, we are so enlightened to see you again”

- What is this ? Why is he feeling funny things in his stomach, every time he’s called like that in his palace it doesn’t happen anything, is something of everyday but now...

- “.... kalim-sama ?” “AH ! Sorry sorry ! Haha I zoned out , say ... could you say that again ? It was so fun !” “Uh.. hu, of course, if that’s my master’s wish !! ☺️” (HAPPY BOY HAPPY BOY HAPPY BOY)

- He probably is inside the maid cafe for very long time just to hear you every time you come around

- “Is everything alright master ? Would you like something else ?” “YES ! One more parfait please !! “ meanwhile Jamil is like “KALIM STOP, YOU HAVE ALREADY ORDERED 30 PARFAITS !!!, what are we going to do with all of this ?!”

- “the potato ? As a servant ? That’s hilarious” Vil is aware of all the maid thing since where he comes from wealthy families tend to have this kind of employees in their mansions

- NEVERTHELESS he can’t have a girl/boy in NRC dressed as a maid and you NOT 👏🏻 BEING 👏🏻 ON 👏🏻 POINT

- DRESS ! Check HIGH HEELS ! check STOCKINGS ! Check .... he goes on and on

- “Vil-senpai, I’m really grateful that you have taken your time to help me but don’t you think that your dorm also needs help-?” “SHUT UP GRACELESS POTATO we are not getting out this classroom until you learn how to move graciously in those high heels between tables while holding the tray , NOW LETS START AGAIN”

- At the end of the day somehow you have managed to make him happy, the next day you will show all your effort to Vil !

- He comes with Rook, it seems that he’s looking for you with his eyes but when you look back at him you never expect to receive such a gentle and proud look

- “Vil/senpa- ! I mean ... “Vil-sama !! Welcome ☺️” you say nervous yet excited to see him there. “Good enough, it looks like even dirty potatoes can turn into princess” (you are like “wait I’m the maid here, not a princess 😅”)

- Vil leans forward and puts a string of hair behind you ear and says in a low voice so only you can hear “a really pretty potato indeed”

- He enters the maid cafe and leaves you blushing in the entrance

- “Are we gonna treat ourselves or what potato ?! “ “ ah ! I’m so sorry master !!”

- Vil has a satisfied smile

- He is so grateful that every time he attends councils is via LIVE ‘cause the moment you said “maid cafe” he spilled the beverage he was drinking

- “m-m-m-mAID CAFÉ ?!” He can’t believe this is happening, for some seconds he can feel a creepy smile appearing in his face until ...

- “But how am I going to go to the cafe ?, I can have Ortho going there but knowing him he will focus the camera on desserts and not in (y/n) costume ... NOT THAT IM A CREEP OR SOMETHING Ijustwanttoseearealmaidinaction well is not that she’s/he’s “real” per say but-“

- Ortho is listening to all his mumbling from back his seat

- “Onii-chan 😊”

- “Ah... what is it Ortho ?”

- “Just go 😠”

- It took A LOT from his little brother to convince him to go and look for you

- The day of the festival it was CROWDED as hell and he was sooo grateful that the classroom where you were having the cafe had a window that had a view to one of the gardens

- He was peeking all the movement from the window looking for you, but some minutes passed and he started thinking (what am I thinking ? Obviously she’s not gonna see me from here ... but entering is NOT an option either ... maybe I just should go-) “Iidia-San?”

- You scared the crap out of him, he was lost in thought but thanks to that he didn’t go

- “Ah! Sorry sorry, Um ... (you remember your character) “iidia-sama, is something the matter ? Why are you out there ?”

- Perhaps Zeus had pity on his soul. You look SO CUTE SO ADORABLE SO SEXY-

- “Uh.... no, it’s just ... there’s a lot of noise inside” you know about his anxiety and you tell him “well, doesn’t my master want something ? I can bring him anything he desires to this window if Iidia-sama wishes”

- He just had a nosebleed

- “I-Iidia- sama ?!” “Ah ! Sorry .... Um yeah o-one crepe... p-please”

- He goes back to Ignihyde with a delicious crepe and a memory of you calling him master... but wait a sec...

- “WHY DIDNT I BROUGHT A CAMERA?!?!?!?!” “I ALSO COULD HAVE RECORDED HER/HIS VOICE DAMN IT!!!!”

- maid ... cafe ? This is interesting

- He was processing everything, from the concept and your explanation to all of the reactions that caused in the guys

- (Why were they so shocked ? Well I guess I will have to find out)

- He’s royalty and everyone calls him “sama” all the time, well except from Lilia, so he thinks that a bunch of butlers calling him that again isn’t any different ... but you 🤔

- How intriguing, you always call him “senpai” or “san” ... now this have caught his attention

- His dorm was organizing everything quite well and as usual Diasomnia had really disciplined members so his presence wasn’t really that necessary so he went to Lilia and asked him about this “maid cafes”

- Lilia knew about the maids but also didn’t understand the concept of mixing maids and cafes, but Lilia being the little devil he was he said some ... funny information that could intrigue Malleus

- “They are humans, but just like pixies they charm every man when they see them” “charm them ? But (y/n) is human ... how can she/he charm anyone ?” “Hehehe you will understand when you see her/him”

- The day arrived, and oh yeah, Lilia was right, he was expecting you to be little and with wings, leaving pixie dust behind but no ... it was just you with a strange yet cute little skirt and fluffy sleeves... your eyes looked at him and your little cheeks tainted a light shade of pink ... (what is this ? I can’t stop looking at her/him) he was in daze

- “Umm .... Malleus-sama ?”

- “Uh .... I’m sorry, so this is a maid ... you are quite powerful”

- “ uh.. hu” you just said your lines when you saw him but he didn’t seem to have listened to you so you decide to repeat them

- “Welcome back Malleus- sama ! We are so enlightened to receive you !!”

- Again .... he’s dazed , but this time he did hear you, so acting a little weird he enters the cafe, you handle him the menu and explain the recommendations

- You are so nervous trying to remember all your lines that you don’t notice it but Malleus is admiring everything about you with loving eyes

- You take his order and go to the kitchen (he honestly doesn’t know what the hell he just ordered since he isn’t familiar with the dishes but anyway)

- Maybe he doesn’t notice himself but he’s looking at you everywhere you go with a little smile on his face

- “Maybe (y/n) has magic after all”

[actualbird]

You have infected me with marluke brainrot AFSGSHSJS

Anyways idk if anyone has mentioned this before, but I was just thinking about how marius' competence kink must really be going through it being constantly surrounded by the very beautiful, highly capable members of the nxx

- 🐍(I hope no one has taken this one yet??)

hello there, Snake!anon :DDD im p sure this isnt taken yet so i'll go with this for future tagging purposes hehe

IM VERY GLAD TO HAVE INFECTED YOU W MARLUKE!!! ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST //evil villain laugh. ALL ACCORDING TO KEIKAKU (keikaku means plan)

and kJBJDFKSD i love that idea so much because YES and UR RIGHT. i have unfortunately not truly explored marius "holy shit ur so hot when u do things ur good at" von hagen in regards to the nxx team in particular, but there was a split second of it i wrote in filler episodes of the lost gold, martem flavor:

Marius leans back against the wall. Having nothing else to do, he watches Artem pick up a handgun. He looks as if he’s gauging its weight, the heft in his hand. Artem seems to think for a moment and puts that one down, picking up another, and...The way Artem wraps his fingers around the grip is one that screams expertise. The way Artem inspects the handgun with a sharp gaze is clear with his meticulous nature. The way Artem looks, holding something he very obviously knows how to use and is most probably very good at using, is honestly, pretty ho— Marius feels his face flush and turns away. Goddamn bisexuality. Always bites him in the ass at the worst times.

yeah, rip this poor shmuck when he sees all the other members do stuff theyre good at, he'll be SUCH a whiny blushy mess. that or "UGH FUCK YOU FOR BEING GOOD AT THAT, GET YOUR HOT FACE OUTTA MY FACE!!!"

[mikyouknow]

Please! Rewatch the quiz! I need something to remind me that that actually happened.

I still vividly remember that day. Going out on a chill bike ride with my two best friends for the first time in months. Sitting in the cool grass. Having a picknick. Not too hot out, nice weather. AND THEN I GET HOME TO THE ABSOLUTEL SHITSHOW THAT HAPPENED THAT DAY! Because what the HELL even was that, I still haven't processed anything. My mind keeps erasing that memory until some days the it just hits me square in the face and knocks me out 😀

So yeah! I would love it if you talked more about it, might help to cope a bit xD

Okay anon you motivated me, you were my Final push, I’m Doing it ! 🗣

Also I love that story tho you really have a Vivid memory connected to this whole thing and I’m living for it 😂 you were just having a nice day and then Boom, all this mess 💀

But aight so I’m Watching it rn and will be taking notes Live as I watch Here we go:

My first thoughts is, when Dream decides to do the quiz, he seems so like, confident? And then as soon as he reads the description, his voice falters at ‘and now things are changing’ and I’m Dead 💀 his confidence from two seconds prior in that moment goes like 📉 then cue flustered laugh lmao

“Do you ever catch yourself staring at your bff?” Dream’s flustered laugh and being all like “these questions are gonna be so weird” uhhhhh dude what are you expecting you’re taking a are you in love with your best friend quiz 💀

HES SO DEFENSIVE ON THIS ONE LIKE- he keeps wanting to make excuses aww drema aww 😭 it’s okay !! George is pretty we Understand you staring king 😌

Like legit that’s the first question and he’s already so flustered and- MY GOD GEORGE HASNT SAID A THING I JUST REALIZED WAIT HOLD ON I NEED TO GO BACK-

Two scoffs. That’s it 🧍‍♀️

GEORGE JSJWNSOWNEEJEN HES NOT SAYING ANYTHING IM DYING WHAT

Even when Dream first goes ‘aight imma take the am I in love w my best friend test’ George is SILENT 💀

Listen- listen, I’m having a moment over this cause I don’t remember him being silent from the start I thought it was like a slow descent into him just going silent eventually, BUT NO he’s just Silent from the moment the quiz is brought up 💀 but gives like a slight scoff when Dream’s voice wavered at “changing” like he’s very much Listening, just being So silent.

I just can’t wrap my head around how he doesn’t answer any of Dream’s comments, Dream keeps being like ‘right? Like that’s normal, right? Like that’s not weird. Right?’ And George is just SILENT 💀

“Do you get jealous if he or she has a bf or gf” LMAO THIS QUESTION MY BELOVED

His answer is so weird I will die on this hill.

ALSO GEORGE S P E A K S for the first time in the quiz 😭🗣 but not much, he says ‘but’, cause, yk, they both know he do get jealous so.

Which, again. Weird as hell. Imma say it, I’ve never felt jealous of my best friend getting a partner like what ???? W h a t

But ofc when they’re so clingy on each other, like a partner would take the others place because they pretty much have each other in that spot already, so it makes sense huh

And that’s not platonic btw I wanna make that clear LMAO

I think the points of which George laughs are interesting. And there’s something interesting to his laugh too. I don’t see his face lighting up with it, if that makes sense. It’s like a, I wouldn’t say ‘nervous’ laugh but, I struggle to find a better word for it 🤔

AYO MY MANS DREAM SAYS I DONT KNOW TO IF HE GETS BUTTERFLIES FROM GEORGE I- 💀

THATS NOT AN I DONT KNOW QUESTION KING

EITHER YOU DO OR YOU DONT AND YOU KNOW IF YOU DO OR DONT LIKE W H A T

I have to sit with this one for a second like . What ? 🧍‍♀️

Butterflies.

I’ve never. In my life. Like.

That’s not- you can’t say you don’t know- THAT MEANS LIKE-

Dear lord.

Aight I’m moving on (not actually imma be awake thinking about this later. Not by choice, absolutely not. This just won’t leave my brain unfortunately.)

Hang on. George says something here when Dream says ‘I have no idea’ but I can’t tell what he’s saying ? Like he mumbles something whilst Dream starts talking at the same time and I can’t make it out and I wanna know what he says 💀🗣

I Think he says ‘what do you mean you have no idea?’ Which like, YEAH, you Should question him on that king 🧍‍♀️ but it’s interesting how quiet he is, like he barely pushes the question, and this is like the second ?? Time he’s spoken so far. 🧍‍♀️

Also Listen to how flustered Dream sounds my god💀

This quiz never should’ve happened what’s Wrong with him like is he this blind ?? Did he Really think taking this quiz was gonna end well ?? 💀

“TecHniCally🥴”

“My future is your future”

I feel like we’ve talked abt these LMAO such Romantic phrasing my god

Again him going ‘right?’ And George is Dead Silent 💀

It’s interesting, like I’ve reached the ‘dreams’ question now, and it’s hitting now and throughout this quiz how, Dream is Loudly deflective, but George is silently deflective. If that makes sense? Like he’s choosing not to speak so his words can’t be thrown back at him cause he Knows if he speaks it’ll be obvious. Whilst Dream over explains and fucks himself over p much lmao. They’re both just a mess around this subject 💀

“How would You be in my dream” is such a funny sentence from George LMAO he’s so defensive 💀 like even I have had dreams abt Dream, like you’re his Best Friend, ofc you have dreams abt him my guy 💀 deflecting it is so weird. So Weird

“I’ve never hugged you” Sad hours 😔

It’s interesting here. Cause they speak abt the whole ‘do you go out of your way for this person’ and Dream is stuck on if he should say ‘more than anyone else I know’ or not. Which, there’s ofc observations to be had here as well.

But ! What I found interesting here was how George goes onto say ‘you made me pay you’ when Dream says he edited his video for him. And how George keeps the ‘lie’ going for a very short bit before laughing slightly, by god he sounds so.. different? Like when he usually makes little lies to troll or stuff like that, he’s much more extra and keeps the bit going and- idk how to explain it but the tone of his voice is usually way different. Here he seems to, idk, struggle to keep that up. His laugh is also just like, somewhat toneless?

LMAO The MOMENT Dream got the question ‘what do you think abt their laugh’ George’s laugh Stops. 💀

“Do you ever think abt what it would be like to Kiss your best friend?”

THE SILENCE

Also,

how Dream read ‘kiss’ 🤝 how Dream read ‘changing’

Some words hit this man different huh LMAO

“Why did that take you so long” on the kiss question, CALL HIM OUT GEORGE 🗣

HRKEJEKEEJEKJEEIEJ HOW ARE THOSE- SORRY WHAT DREAM ??

“HOW ARE THOSE THE ONLY OPTIONS” ???

God, for real, I wish Dream would get to sit down with someone one day who just Listened to him speak and allowed him to slip up and just sound so in love with George like give himself away simply because nobody is saying how weird he’s-

Hold on.

Wait. A minute.

George.

George is doing that LMAOOOO

Him sitting there silently and not responding to all his small questions abt what he Should answer and such, he’s so smart🧍‍♀️

AIGHT MOVING ON

George’s laugh keeps sounding very, like, strange😅

Anyways the way Dream Had to have a ‘yes’ answer to the kiss one will forever keep me up at night. Now along with the butterflies one🧍‍♀️

I rly wonder what options it is Dream is looking for when he says ‘none of these options’ so often. What is it you wanna say king ?

WHY IS THE BUTTERFLIES QUESTION TWICE AND WHY IS HIS ANSWER NOW DIFFERENT LMAO - drema it’s okay it’s Safe Space 🗣 I feel like he probably saw chat responding to his first answer and realized ‘oop, that’s not platonic’ and changed his answer LMAO 💀 he’s- Ahh hard to find the right words for my Thoughts here, but he’s doing that thing where he looks for others what is ‘normal’ instead of seeing what he feels, cause what He feels is, uh, well we all know what results he got at the end there,,

I mean the kiss question is all u need really. The butterflies one puts icing on the whole cake.

“Do you compare this person to others you’ve dated? Noo...” AIGHT AND THERE WE HAVE THE CHERRY ON TOP OF THE WHOLE THING

This was the one of the Most sus ones imo from when I first watched it. It had my head spin, head in hands for Days.

What do you MEAN you compare him to others you’ve dated? Why does he tell George to shut up, why do they both Know there’s a story there- I have so many questions on this and- this isn’t platonic 💀😭 AT ALL - and there’s no excuse or explanations for this one, they just Move On 💀

The Speed at which they move on 💀

And then George goes So silent 🧍‍♀️

Dream is cruising through the questions and George is so silent now. He was Stunned into silence from that shut up LMAO

I like how Dream picked ‘absolutely’ on being able to tell George everything :’)

So.

Why does George not say anything on the ‘do you think your best friend is in love with you’ question? No joke, no protest, no- no nothing?

That leaves us to fill in the blanks king, just saying🧍‍♀️

Why does Dream sound sarcastic when he says it’s a tough question LMAO

“I have no idea” aight good answer ig LMAO let’s Pretend

George’s silence is for real very sus there. Very. 🥴

Dream putting ‘no’ on thinking he’s in love, is Very funny and shows just how blind he is to himself.

He rly put ‘I don’t know’ for the butterflies one and found the nearest ‘yes’ option for the kiss one and then still put ‘no’ at the end - he’s a lost cause and owns no mirrors I see how it is. (/j btw lmao I have hope in drema ofc, he too can become more self aware one day<3)

“You are a little in love with your best friend” cue both of them laughing in just the weirdest ways. George just sounds absolutely toneless like, I don’t think he’s even smiling with that laugh, gaze absolutely dazed at what he’s being witness to, not even knowing what to do with himself in that moment. And Dream’s laugh is also just, weird?

“You don’t wanna ruin it, Dream.” Followed by Dream’s immediate, “oh what? It says-“ like immediately moving on lmao 💀 that “oh what?” Sounded like “oh what’s that there oh that’s rly weird wow let’s move on from what you just said ahem wow really weird thing over there” LMAO

“There’s a two percent chance there” LMAO

OH NO THE SILENCE WHAT

I THOUGHT I ACCIDENTALLY PAUSED THE VIDEO BUT THE SILENCE IS SO LONG AND SO LOUD

Then Dream going onto pretending like he’s gonna do another test As If he’s not been planning his escape excuse from the very moment he got those test results LMAO

And the silent pauses are taking me out 💀

‘I think we’re done’ HOW COULD HE LEAVE AT THAT POINT 💀💀💀

“COOL PODCAST” IM DEAD ON THE FLOOR

“WHY ARE YOU SO NOSY” DREAM I- WHY U SO DEFENSIVE GEORGE ASKING WHERE YOU’RE GOING IS A NORMAL THING TO ASK 💀YOU’RE THE ONE WHO’S SUDDENLY LEAVING

NOT DREAM AWKWARDLY SINGING THE WIZARD OF OZ-

HE SOUNDS SO WEIRD-

The tone of his voice is so off my guy is so ready to leave and sit and stare at a wall whilst looping heatwaves for five hours 💀

:((((( drema my beloved :((((( it’s okay to be in love !!

Not him leaving- he full on ignored George’s ‘where are you going?’

He’s not going anywhere istg the moment he left that discord he put his head in his hands and just Stared 💀

Poor George 🥺

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i��m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

[yakocchi]

Becoming a Family With Him, Part 3 // Shuichi, Hikaru, Rhion, Luke, Eisuke

so this came out, as further celebration for the anni. VERY GOOD, much more appreciated than the prior story set lol that one was kind of boring but i get it

they made the kids for all the... kid-less ones, and the eisuke one that used to be VIP-exclusive is now here for everyone to buy (rip those ppl who gacha for it)

my rambling behind the cut (spoilers!!)

shuichi // as ud expect, shuichi has a literal hime ass looking girl (kikyo) for a daughter. she’s only 6, but is pretty calm and ladylike. She even calls her parents with –sama so... ok luckily shuichi does not strip down all the way in the presence of her daughter and only takes off his suit coat. thanks dad

anyway since shuichi has a break coming up, he wants to have a family trip how nice. but then the dang girl wants to go over to see eisuke WHAT when soryu exists and lives a block away? unrelatable, im closing the app anyway eisuke is her first love, which wtf he’s like 20 yrs older than u. even worse, mc says she’s been in love since she was like 3.

shuichi is reconsidering the benefits of democracy in his mind but eventually relents. but then they’re still following the fucc-days rule they set years ago. well, as he says in the story, RULES ARE RULES

blah blah i don’t want to go over everything bc then it’ll be boring reading the story when it comes out in engl right? also im tired bc it’s 1 am and i just want to play toontown in bed but nothing really bad happens. they are a v cute family bc shuichi is a pleasant and mature dad. kikyo and mc even do a little surprise for him at the end and it is very sweet. i feel like out of all the families, this is the most ideal

mad hatter // so they have twin sons named Rui and Kai. Rui is the childlike one that resembles Rhion in personality, Kai is the more mature one that resembles Al. man i forget that boy’s name but u get me i know they only can use stock bgs but it’s killing me that these dang kids get to sleep in what looks like separate king sized beds.

even though rhion is now a father of two, he still acts like... 10. i mean he still horni but it makes me feel weird

later it’s revealed that Ota teaches them both as an art tutor bc they both showed an interest in art. this is cute bc ota is bad with kids in this universe LOL

the ending on this one was weird cuz the kids didn’t show up in the entirety of the last ep bc it was about WORK. so uh... interesting

hikaru // so their son is named akari. haha get it because it means light. like how hikaru also means light. can mc name her kids unrelated to their father or is that against the Geneva convention

this kid actually acts like an actual little boy. like what hikaru would’ve probably turned into if not for the whole sad backstory. the story starts with akari just bringing a dog randomly home one day. he actually saved the dog (it is very cute bc he did not want the dog to cry), and then after a talk they decide to keep the dog as long as akari knows the responsibility of taking care of an animal.

so next day, the bidders come over to their house and everyone’s like woaw a dog. lol they come into their house as guests and eisuke and mamo still demand for beverages, they all suck

akari names the dog... “Light” (Raito) and i want out of this nightmare. Naturally bc Light is an abandoned dog it’s still kind of bad with interacting with things. But then Light suddenly be giving the ( ╹ਊ╹) to soryu bc remember, animals love him. everyone clowns on soryu for being an unintentional dog whisperer and then akari is like “soryu san pls make me ur apprentice” and he gives some advice like approaching it slowly, and talking to it from the front instead of back.

blah blah there’s a situation where Light goes YEET after a Doberman gets all angry and then hides bc then another dog is scaring it. hikaru swoops in to the save the day as the Real Dog Whisperer. ok it’s cute when hikaru actually gets to look cool  for once LOL

luke // luke is cute on the bc “pre-story” scene he’s actually pretty open to the idea of having kids; he actually goes “well imo we should think abt it pretty soon, but i wanted to hear ur opinion on it” but then he gets horni. and then he’s like “our kids are going to have your collarbones. awesomeee im looking forward to that” ....ok

ok cut to the actual story and they’re in Japan. Luke’s kid looks... strange versus the others. why are his eyes so big? omg voltage his eyes arent going to be saucers just cuz he half white also the kid’s name is Yuri (Or Urey). They couldn’t think of any other Brit-styled names? Like Harry? Henry? William? Wilfred? hey stan be my princess btw he’s pretty cute, though he gives serious “timid kid that gets bullied in the children’s movie” vibes. He calls Luke “daddy” and mc “mammy/mommy”.

so luke talks about his relationship w/ soryu and eisuke and then yuri is like “i want friends like that” wow cute but also find less ethically-complicated friends

so luke lets yuri meet a young patient of his (haru) so they can be friends. they get along so it’s good. haru gets in critical condition later so luke zooms outta there to do the operation.

LOL but at the end yuri is like, “i want to make more friends. (...) can i go to the bidder’s room from now on?” this boy works fast

And then he’s like “Eisuke-san... please be my friend.” HIS POWER. even eisuke was like :O so then eisuke orders a whole bunch of food and books up to the penthouse. But then yuri’s like “...i like eisuke’s eyes” and everyone’s like oh man that’s gonna be his fetish

Baba: why have u started to have an interest in eyes Yuri: I read it from one of daddy’s medical books Hikaru: wtf u can read that at 4??? (...) Soryu: wat Yuri: um... i want soryu to be my friend too Yuri: bc soryu’s eyes are also powerfully cool...

eisuke // ok this gets an extended ramble bc the more annoying the story the longer i must complain

so you might be thinking, “oh so this is gonna be a flashback in some in media res styled story with your 2 kids, u know in the style of the others” and well, no you just go straight to white screen into the flashback, back when eito was smaller and thus a little more cute. well it’s not really false advertising bc they did say “reminisce” in the description. but i wanted to see eito be a good big brother for a moment! or... less good? man i wanted to see kaito go waaaah like a baby idk i wanted to see him exist

so back to the story they cut to small eito. even as a smaller punk he does fight with his dad a little, just w/ a more narrow vocabulary to work with. tho at this point he’s still pretty sweet so clearly eisuke clowning him day and night was a negative effect on his development. (doesn’t treat his child like a child) (child grows up to a punk that doesn’t respect him) (surprised pikachu) being the son of a billionaire means that this child has to go study at a very young age and listen to MOZART. no child of eisuke ichinomiya will be listening to degenerate bops like lee taemin’s criminal next day they all go to the very fancy school that eito will be attending. eisuke does a speech, but then eito is all like “why is papa over there all the time” in reference to how all the other parents in attendance are having fun with their children, but eisuke is busy talking to other people for business and connections etc. etc. mc kind of has a hard time trying to explain it to eito bc... it’s honestly poor parenting... eiji shows up after arriving late, and he’s like “gramps is gonna be with ya today! instead of papa” which is cute but then she’s like psst thanks for coming and im like oh... so grandpa just didn’t randomly come to the open house for fun he’s just gonna be surrogate dad while real dad is busy... aw... and then at the end eito’s like FUC THIS KINDERGARTEN. eisuke is like “(smh) don’t yell in public. (despite everything) you are still the eldest son of the Ichinomiya family”

and so afterwards it’s clear that eito does not want anything to do with this school. he just sits in the classroom until mc is there to pick him up instead of playing in the courtyard or w/e, wanting nothing to do with the other kids.

so later there’s a hiking trip for the students and both of their parents, and mc asks eisuke if he’ll be available for it. eisuke is like, “i have a business trip that day, so I’ll have to adjust my schedule” and he’s been very busy in the opening of a new business or w/e. mc tells him to not do so much for something like that and that it’s ok if she goes alone with eito on the trip.

it’s the day of the trip, and mc goes alone with eito. she notes that a lot of dads did indeed come along for the trip. she apologizes to eito and says that she did talk to eisuke about the trip before, but he’s simply busy for this day. and im like... but girl, you were the one who told him not to change his schedule for the trip. yes a trip may seem less important than business ventures, but don’t make it sound like you weren’t the one who stopped him. lol. idk why im pressed abt this single line of dialogue bc later she does realize she fucced up there well eito is just like w/e about it and has pretty much accepted that sort of thing

anyway eito goes missing later and one of the kids said that he told eito that his dad (eisuke) didn’t come bc his dad thinks that his work is more important than his son. so eito got mad and ran off somewhere

and then mc finally gets the lightbulb moment that eito... wants to see his dad!! he ran off to go try to see him somehow??? !! wow so sweet

it’s raining like a mf but then in her search for eito eisuke randomly pops out of nowhere. He’s like “ho i did not remember saying that i wasn’t coming” and she’s like “im sorrryyy” and both me and him are like “just find the dang kid”

ok yea they find eito, he starts being a good student, and u start to see where he starts being antagonistic towards his dad LOL etc. etc. lol this story annoyed me so i don’t feel like doing the rest of the play by play orz

anyway thanks for reading my garbage LOL

[attemptingtowriteagain]

Masterlist - Updated 08/17/2020

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader - Kiss prompt #1

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader - Kiss Prompt #2 (NSFWish)

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Senator!Reader

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Senator!Reader

Obi-Wan Kenobi - I’m tired of being your secret

Obi-Wan - I might have slept in your robe while you were gone

Commander Cody

Commander Cody x Jedi!Reader

Commander Cody x Reader Imagine

Cody - I had a nightmare about you and I just wanted to make sure you’re okay

Cody - We both know that I should walk away but I can’t

Captain Rex

Imagine tripping over your own feet and Rex catching you in a dip

Rex x Padawan!Reader

Rex x Reader

Captain Rex x Jedi!Reader

Imagine Rex asking you to marry him

Rex - What’s in the box

Rex - So... Breakfast?

Arc Trooper Echo

Imagine spending a lazy day with Echo

Arc Trooper Echo x Reader

Echo - I don’t know why I’m crying

Echo - I adore you

Arc Trooper Fives

Imagine Fives always telling you lame pick-up lines

Fives x Reader

Fives - This is by far the dumbest thing you’ve ever done

Clone Trooper Jesse

Jesse x Reader (NSFW)

Jesse - If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were flirting with me

Jesse - Are you really flirting with me right now

Jesse - Ugh, not you again

Commander Wolffe

Commander Wolffe x Reader

Commander Wolffe x Reader

Commander Wolffe x Reader

Wolffe - Well this will make an exciting diary entry

Wolffe - Let me tell you exactly where in the hell you can go

Wolffe - The baby’s kicks are keeping me up

Clone Trooper Kix

Kix - I brought you some caf

Kix - Are you still awake

Clone Trooper Hardcase

Hardcase - First one to make a sound loses

Hardcase - I love you a lot, but please stop trying to cook me dinner, you suck

500 Follower Appreciation 

14 - Morning wood sliding against your ass - Kix

25 - His fingers sliding between you own - Wolffe

NSFW 5-10 Sentence Requests

(Below the cut in case people don’t like NSFW)

NSFW with Fives or Wolffe playing strip-poker? XD Thank you ;)

NSFW Headcanon: Can I get a hc where the reader strip-dances around Hardcase during a night at 79’s? owo

Hello there! For NSFW headcanon thing: may I please request first time with Obi?

NSFW head cannon request: Rex likes to surprise his S/O in the shower to initiate intimate times ;) Thanks a ton!

You said so yourself, you can send as many as you want!!! THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD!!! Lemme request a Tup ficlet, where they do a quickie before battle?

NSFW headcanon Request. Fives enjoys morning sex. Please and thanks!!

3rd time here again, back and betta aye Lemme get a Kix ficlet where Kix teases the reader throughout the day, and when they get into the barracks shit really starts going uphill?

NSFW Headcanon request please! Wolffe likes marking his s/o😏 p.s your writing is AMAZING liebling😍i love you💞

NSFW headcanon request: Cody finds the reader masturbating to him; Cody gives them an intimate time after finding them in that stance? ;)

NSFW headcannon: Hardcase loves the risk of getting caught. Thank you so much!

Hi! Can I request a NSFW with Fives and Reader having sex after having some stupid fight? Thank you!! :)

THERE HASN’T BEEN A CODY NSFW HEADCANON SO HERE IS MY THOT ASS- Nsfw ficlet Where Cody likes to use leashes on their s/o?

I love your writing! Can I get a 5 sentence NSFW Wolffe? That he loves to eat out his s/o on the kitchen table? Please and thank you!

Can you do the the Nsfw headcannon of Captain Rex fucking his gf while she wears his helmet? THANK YOU🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

For the NSFW headcannons can you write Hardcase loves cumming in his ladyfriend? I need more of him❤️ You’re the best!

For the NSFW headcannons can you write Hardcase loves cumming in his ladyfriend? I need more of him❤️ You’re the best!

NSFW head cannon please and thank you : Echo is reeeeaaalllyyy good at oral ;)

NSFW head cannon request: Anything with Rex and blindfold. Pretty please and thanks!

Hello! NSFW with a frustrated Wolffe after lost a battle? Thank you!

I just had this thought as like, an NSFW headcanon where Fives likes to talk dirty in his s/o’s ear just to tease them during the day and to just get them in the mood

NSFW ficlet with Hardcase? His S/O and him went on a secret mission, and his s/o is dressed up in a extremely revealing costume, and Hardcase just does them when they go back to Coruscant. Thanks! I REALLY LOVE THESE

NSFW heascanon for Cody. He starts off slow and loves foreplay but once the first article of clothing gets removed the whole mood changes 😉

Nsfw ficlet where his s/o is a pole dancer, and during their break, Cody just takes them backstage and just pounds into them relentlessly until his s/o cannot walk straight?

NSFW Ficlet with Kix? Kix likes to do BDSM with his s/o?

NSFW request: Rex’s reunion with his girlfriend after a long time apart gets heated ;). Thanks!

Nsfw ficlet with Fives? He likes to use sex toys on his s/o?

Your writing is awesome! Can I request nsfw Cody with a jedi lover after thinking they were dead (dat sweet ‘i almost lost you’ stuff tho)

Hi! Can I request an NSFW head cannon w/ Wolffe please? He really likes it when his s/o rides him? Thank you!

NSFW Request: Captain rex being the readers first time. Thanks a ton!

NSFW with Fives throwing a “special” birthday party for reader?

NSFW ficlet with Rex? He loves to use sex toys on his s/o in bed?

Hello! I really love your stories, and I am so in love with these NSFW ficlets!! Could I request with Jesse, please? Jesse likes to use his hands on his girl to make her cum a lot???

Nsfw headcannon? Fives loves getting head in public Thank youuu

i see that you’re writing again!!! may i get a nsfw request where cody likes to finger his s/o and see her squirt? 

I see NSFW requests are open again >:D Rex gets too stressed sometimes working on files so his s/o decides to help relieve his stress by riding him

....nsfw clones? Hmm. Any that doesn't get enough love or your muse...or who fits best for this. GF that loves going down on them. And if your feeling it. Separate or together. F2f who loves being railed against a wall by their lover ;p

I love your writing! Could you write NSFW with cyborg Echo and his s/o? His metal arm could vibrate and they used it in bed. S/o convince Echo that he's still her Echo no matter how he looks.

im a hoe and im back for the requests. ANYWAYS, can i get a nsfw request where hardcase has his s/o pose up as a stripper and he gets really turned on so he fucks her really hard in the back rooms 😳😳😳

Yo I asked for an nsfw request a long time ago when they were closed and I'm so glad they're back. ❤ Can I *cough* *slides a $20* get: Can I request a rex nsfw ficlet and he and s/o got a thing for cum. Like lots of it and everywhere. 👌

Headcannon idea, Obi Wan wall sex? Or sex standing up, where he is holding the reader?

Could you do Obi Wan face sitting?

can i get a nsfw request where cody likes to get called ‘commander’ in the bedroom?

Nsfw request: Rex making his s/o squirt for the first time and being really into it??

hey! can i get nsfw request with commander cody where the reader fingers herself on a comlink video call with the commander? he commands her on what to do and stuff? thanks!

nsfw headcanon thing idk - for kix: he gets a holovideo of his s/o masturbating and he jacks off to the video then his s/o catches him; then they masturbate to one another before fucking ❤️ thanks

Can I ask for an NSFW headcannon with obi wan and the reader engaging in some bdsm?

nsfw headcanon - tup loves to eats out his s/o on the table; his s/o loves to praise him and run her fingers through his long hair. thanks!

Hello there! I love the frustrated Wolffe NSFW headcannon and was wondering if we could get one for Rex?

NSFW for Rex- reader is a huge tease and Rex finally snaps and roughly fucks the reader

nsfw request with hardcase pretty please? he likes to pick up his s/o and eat them out against the wall as he squeezes at her tits? thank you☺️

NSFW with kix needing some help from his “nurse?”

NSFW: fives eats you out from under your desk while a commander tries to talk to you!

nsfw prompt w/ jesse - they catch their s/o pleasuring themselves and see their lewd expressions and sounds; jesse teaches them some patience

hello! can i have a nsfw prompt with fives? reader is his s/o and she gives him a lap dance for him? fives takes care of her ;)

nsfw with wolffe asking his s/o if he's making them feel good

NSFW for captain rex and s/o where the s/o is pleasuring themselves when rex walks in and they're super embarrassed and tries to apologize when rex decides to help them

NSFW Jesse eating out mechanic reader while she’s bent over fixing something?

for the nsfw request! Echo talking dirty to reader at inappropriate (and appropriate) times 💙

Nsfw prompt with Cody - Cody saves reader and she repays him for his heroic act

nsfw prompt for echo - his s/o wears very revealing clothing around him and echo can't take it anymore and rips off her clothing. thanks

NSFW request: teasing Jesse in front of the shinies and he orders them to clear out so he can fuck your face 😜

NSFW: Fives x reader where it’s the readers first time please? Thanks!

i’d like to request a nsfw prompt with echo? his s/o always sends him lewd photos of herself for him when he’s away, and when he’s coming back she sends him a picture with her in his favorite set of lingerie. thank you❣️

Idk if it’s canon but I feel like Jesse is a bit bigger than your average clone? I was hoping for the NSFW prompt you could write something about him having a size kink and teasing the reader by saying dirty things throughout the day! Thank you!

NSFW with Rex where the reader made him jealous and he snaps? Thanks Love

nsfw prompt - reader is wolffe’s s/o; s/o rides/sits on her commander’s face ;)

Can you do a NSFW with Cody where he just teases her throughout the whole day please? Thanks.

Jesse smut pre order 66

nsfw with wolffe when the reader enjoys teasing

wolffe fucking his s/o inside a laat gunship? thank u❤️

NSFW: could you please do one where the reader is Cody’s first time?? I’ve never seen it done before, and your writing is amazing I thought I’d as you!

Nsfw of Wolffe fucking the reader.

[sleepless-in-starbucks]

14 (bodyguard AU) and 46 (blind date) sounds fun,,, your choice of ship ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥

14. Bodyguard AU || 46. Blind date

Random choice generator got me creativisleep!

~

roman's a semi-popular actor- he's never really been to an awards show, and he's not been in That much, but he had a small but strong role in a real popular film and plenty of leading ones in lesser known movies. he's got enough of a following to be satisfied with himself, even if it isn't That huge of one

because of this, roman didn't take the possible dangers of his fame seriously... until he got jumped by one fan at a play in his hometown. he came out fine (he's always fine ;p) but it made him reconsider his choice to not have some sort of protection

he ends up hiring remy to be his bodyguard, a choice he Slightly starts regretting when he realizes remy, despite having excellent marks out of bodyguard school, is about as professional as a golden retriever

they take roman's food out of his fridge Whenever, borrow Way too many of his shirts (and roman hasn't seen his BMC 'boyf riends' hoodie since they got their hands on it), and is never in typical bodyguard wear (they wore a suit for the interview and never again)

but they also bring roman coffee (when did they get his regular figured out...?), talk to him like he's just a Person and not a celeb, and have yet to try and kill him themself so. roman's alright with them staying

(plus, is it so wrong if roman enjoys how they look? he deserves for a bit of an eye-candy sorta bodyguard, damnit, they're with him all the time after all)

remy's been with roman as his bodyguard for a few months when roman decides he cant just keep Lookin at a pretty person, he deserves to have a pretty person to kiss and cuddle with too!! so he pokes around for a bit, finds a non-homophobic service (he's pan, so he could Technically use a plain ol' straight service, but he refuses on gay principle), and uses it

idk how datin apps work but this one that im makin up is a blind match up app, which takes ur information and uses it to randomly pair u up with random accounts. the app keeps account info privated until After the first date has been gone on, to really maintain the 'blind match' aspect. the matched up people play a mini guessing game through the app about places they can go for a date until location and time is determined

roman likes the idea of the app mostly to keep his own identity secret as long as possible- he doesnt want people pickin his account Just bc he's a celeb, y'know?

the first couple of blind dates dont go well tho... most are nice people who roman just isn't compatible with, one was a straight woman who spent the entire date being Very homophobic despite roman's rainbow heart + pan flag pins, and someone who was clearly Too Much Of A Fan (remy had to physically pull them off of roman and help him escape the park before they could latch back on)

oh, did roman not mention? remy's been coming on all his dates with him

because of course they are! they need to protect roman! whether that's by eating dinner in the booth over or sitting two rows back at the cinema or awkwardly half-stalkin roman and his date while they walk about

so they're always there, to bring roman there and take him home, and listen when he complains about the bad matches and lament the almost-winners, and convince him he is a catch that needs to try again because eventually Someone will realize he really is too good to pass up

(remy always says that line in a weird way)

so he keeps trying... until roman has possibly the worst date ever

because he gets stood up. it's fifteen minutes past the scheduled date time, he's gotten no text explainin where they are, but he's sittin at the restaurant alone and starting to become rather upset by the pitying look the server gives him when he says he's still waitin on someone else before he orders

remy slides into the seat across from him at the 20 minute mark. shoots roman an apologetic smile that an outsider would mistake as a 'sorry im late' one when roman knows it's a 'sorry they didnt show' one

roman appreciates the gesture to save him, but he almost just wants to go home at this point. he's tired and bein stood up feels like Shit, actually, and he's about ready to call off the whole dating thing really, dramatic as that may be (like it's not his middle name)

but remy says smth about this place having really good sandwiches, and it's clear they're tryin so hard to help roman out here, even a little, and roman can't just dismiss that effort, so he picks up his menu again and orders smth and tries to ignore the way his face heats up just the slightest at the relieved smile remy flashes next

lunch with remy is great, actually, better than it would've been with whoever couldnt be bothered to show or apologize or Anything. remy even knows the way to an ice cream shop on the way home, sayin it's for roman's 'broken heart' as they pay for it

except, well... roman's heart isn't feelin so broken anymore

it's actually feeling pretty put together. really functional. functioning really fast. especially when roman's looking at remy. or when remy's lookin at roman. or when they smile. or when they laugh. or when they speak. or when they-

roman doesn't fall asleep until 2am that night, heart still racing a bit, screaming into his pillow a bit as he acknowledges he is wholly and totally head-over-heels for his bodyguard

he tells remy the next day he's done with dating for a bit, saying he's still upset over being stood up. he doesn't mention that it's also bc remy's ruined all other people for him

things try to fall back in routine from there, but it's a bit harder when roman's trying to not be so in love with someone who just works for him. and remy's definitely started pickin up on it too- they had asked him just last if he was okay, that he didn't seem as upset by remy takin his clothes anymore, and that didn't seem like him, was he getting sick?

the opposite, actually, absolutely nothing makes me feel better then seeing you walk around in my shirt or jacket or whatever else, please never stop and also kiss me?

roman just said he was tired

eventually... roman decides this can't keep going on. remy's giving him more weird looks these days, and roman is pretty sure being around remy so much without Any kisses is starting to cause brain decay (it's not, it's really not, remy always bein on his mind is just a side effect of.... pretti........). so, he takes matters into his own hands

admittedly, maybe firing remy wasn't the best way to go, given remy immediately demands to know why, what they did wrong, even asking if roman's being blackmailed into this

"blink once for yes, twice for no" remy asks, lowering the sunglasses they always have on to look directly at roman's eyes

roman doesn't blink for a full minute. he might not be breathing for that minute either. has he ever seen remy's eyes this close? has he ever seen them at all? they're such a brilliant shade of brown. roman could drown in them. he might be already

roman's pretty sure he started this conversation standing up, but maybe not, because when he finally blinks and remembers things outside of remy's eyes exist he's sitting down and remy looks extremely concerned

"okay... what's wrong, hun?" they ask, and oh no, they look so sad, and worried, and that's not good, roman should fix that right now, regardless of whatever he was doing before (he's forgotten)

"im gay" he responds intelligently. this will fix everything

remy, however, just looks confused. "yes?"

"for you" roman adds, helpfully, sure that Now remy will understand they're just really very pretty and nothing's wrong and if they feel bad still they should look in a mirror because then they'll be good again

now it's remy's turn to sit in silence, expression frozen in one of shock. they still havent put their sunglasses back on, so roman doesnt mind, bc this gives him more time to stare at remy's eyes

"you're having a breakdown because you're gay for me???" remy finally asks, expression unfreezing to look incredulous and a little hurt

roman returns a similar look. "im not having a breakdown!"

remy scoffs. "yeah, sure, right, that's why you suddenly froze and completely stopped breathing and minorly collapsed after i... look off my shades to look at you..." they suddenly break out in a smirk. "oh my gods, you're a gay disaster"

roman doesn't try to deny it, especially with the knowledge he apparently did stop breathing to admire remy's eyes. they have a point

"how long?"

"since that date you hijacked after i got stood up" roman admits. he finds it extraordinarily rude when remy starts laughing

...until they're pulling out their phone, hurriedly opening up the exact same dating app roman had been using, showing a log of all the dates they had planned- there's only one marked as having actually been attended

same date time and place of the one where roman had assumed he had been stood up

"you broke my heart!" roman says as remy puts away their phone, over-dramatically, not actually giving a damn, just feeling gay and a bit giddy at the thought remy hadnt gone to any of the other dates, just theirs

no longer worried quite as much about roman for the moment, remy's smirk just grows, smoothly moving from being crouched in front of roman to being set firmly in his lap, lazily brushing hair out of his eyes and wow was remy always this warm? and stunning? and perfect?

"i dunno babe... sounds more like i stole it" remy teases, movin from playing with roman's hair to cuppin his cheek, leaning in close and not even bothering to pretend to be looking at anything other than roman's lips. "which, yeah, bad bodyguard etiquette... i hope you can forgive me..."

roman doesn't need his words to answer that tease

[jbarness]

huh, that's new

a social media au

[27: news]

warnings: language, "pregnancy"?? uhh idk what else hehehe

a/n: this is a pretty long chapter i think? (2000+ words) im very nervous about this chapter cause its kinda a big deal asdfghjk anyways, please please please tell me what you think about this! and ik this idea is very odd HAHAHAHA but what else would you expect from two dumbasses named bucky and y/n? hehehe i really hope you enjoy this chapter!! ♡

flashback is italicized

huh, that's new - masterlist

You wanted to laugh so badly.

For some reason, your housemates are panicking over who the hell set this gender reveal party up in the living room. 

It was you. With the help of Bucky of course.

Natasha and Wanda have been shouting “I’m not pregnant, I think you are!” to each other for about 10 minutes now. Steve decided that he needed answers too, so he joined in the shouting. Pietro’s talking to his camera, probably vlogging the whole thing. Peter’s talking on the phone with MJ asking if she set this up. Sam’s the only one enjoying the food. Bucky was looking at you from across the room, keeping the smile from forming on his face. 

Just about an hour or so ago, you and Bucky were just setting the whole thing up. Bucky was pushing the table to the living room when you arrived with the cake. You placed the rest of the blue and pink food on the table along with other decorations. There were many variations of food, but the cupcakes that have toppers that said: “Here for the Sex” were Bucky’s personal favorite despite not knowing how they taste. The balloons were still lifeless when both of you hung the streamers on the walls with the banner that matched the topper of the cupcakes. After finally finding the balloon pump, blue and pink balloons filled the living room. Some were on the floor while you hung the others on the wall. When you were content with the appearance of the room, you and Bucky went your separate ways.

You got the idea of throwing a gender reveal party when you were working at the diner one evening. “You’ll be at the gender reveal party next week right?” the woman at the booth asked her friend. “Of course, Jill asked me to pick up the cake,” Her friend says. When you got the idea, you thought it was silly, so you dismissed it. Later on, you thought of more ideas and details to add, then in a blink of an eye, you were in the bakery, asking the baker if they can make a three-layered cake of your favorite flavor with the inside colored blue.

“Maybe P set this all up for a prank again?” Nat looked at Pietro who was filming the whole thing. “Just because I have a channel that doesn’t mean I always prank!” Pietro said, turning off his camera.

Steve sighed, “Okay, one by one. Nat and I were the first ones here, but it was all here already when we arrived. Wanda was the next one here, she was in the bookstore the whole morning. Bucky and Sam were next and they only came here because he saw the Instagram story of Nat. Pietro and Peter came home today from LA and Peter from Tony’s. Lastly, Y/N came home from the cafe,” everyone nodded. 

After a couple of minutes of silence, you couldn’t handle it anymore, “Okay, I can’t do it. I give up. It was me. I set this up,” you laughed. 

“But why Y/N?” Peter gasped, “Are you pregnant?”

Everyone’s eyes were on you now. Natasha’s eyes widened, “Wait, who’s the father?”

Bucky was laughing internally, you could tell. He wasn’t looking at you anymore, he turned around to look at the window. You could see his shoulders slightly shaking, he’s definitely laughing. Good thing the attention wasn’t on him. “I uhh… I don’t know,” you said. You technically haven't met Bucky's dad, you were being honest.

“Doesn’t matter, my sweet Y/N! We’ll support you and help you. Anything you need” Sam swallowed the macaroon whole before going to you and hugging you tightly.

“I know you will.” In less than a minute, you were trapped in the middle of the group hug.

“Why didn’t you say anything sooner? We would’ve known the gender by now!” Pietro said as the group untangled from the hug. 

You laughed, “I was enjoying the show.” 

“Well, come on! I wanna know if my godchild is a boy or a girl!” Wanda yelled excitedly and went to the kitchen to grab the knife. 

Bucky walked towards you before you could join the others who are now gathered at the table, waiting for plates and the knife. “I’m tellin’ ya, doll, they’re gonna be frustrated at us,” he said. You shrugged, “They already are.”

Wanda handed you the knife to cut the cake. Everyone took out their phones to take a video of the “soon-to-be-mother”. You were trying very hard not to laugh at this point and so was Bucky, who was taking a video of his friends’ reactions to what they’re about to say.

You sliced a triangle on one side of the cake and pulled it out, showing blue. “Oh my God! It’s a boy!” Peter yelled, jumping around with Pietro. Sam and Steve took turns hugging you and they were later pushed aside by Wanda and Nat. “I’m happy for you, hun I am, but I really hope that a girl comes out of you,” Natasha said while hugging you and Wanda tightly. 

You cleared your throat, catching everyone’s attention, “It’s actually a Bucky” you said, nonchalantly. 

“Bucky?” Wanda pulled away slightly from the hug, making Nat do the same. “A Bucky? As in it’s Bucky’s baby?” Steve asked, wide-eyed, obviously excited, looking at Bucky who is now looking back at you, covering his mouth with his hands, to keep himself from laughing. 

“I meannnnn… Bucky... is my... baby,” you said while extending your arm, inviting Bucky to come closer, which he did. 

Peter was still confused and it shows, “You’re Bucky’s mom?” he asked, making Pietro smack his head, “Pete, it means they’re dating... Right?”

Both you and Bucky nodded, “We are.”

“Oh my God! Fucking finally! I was starting to think you’ll never tell each other how you feel! Do you know how frustrated you two made me?” Sam yelled, throwing a pillow at Bucky.

Natasha was yelling “I fucking knew it! I told you so!” repeatedly to her boyfriend while Wanda kept pinching both your and Bucky’s cheeks saying, “CUTIESSS!” 

You looked at Bucky, “they don’t look frustrated” you said which made Bucky roll his eyes and smile. Both of you laughed when you saw Steve silently saying “Yes! My ship!” Either that or something about shit.

“Calm your asses. Now, this party isn’t just for us to announce that we’re together. This is also a party for Natty and Steve. Sorta like the part one of the roomies night we’re gonna have�� you said, looking at the couple.

“Thank you, Y/N, but I don’t wanna think about moving right now. What I do want is for you two to give us the fucking details about how you two finally got together” Nat said, making everyone agree and sit down and get comfortable in the living room.

Bucky cleared his throat and looked on his left, where you sat. “It happened the night that her friend came to the city.”

☆

To say you were excited for tonight was an understatement. 

Last night, you already picked out the clothes you wanted to wear tonight. It was simple, really, just a pair of jeans and the most comfortable hoodie you owned. Or should you go with a plain sweater instead? Printed shirt? Oversized shirt? Your grey sweatpants? They look comfortable. Or your black ones?

You ended up with your first choice. 

Wanda and Nat noticed how upbeat and cheery you were the whole day. It wasn’t exactly like you to be this happy at 7 am. You cooked a lot more food than usual and you haven’t even had your coffee yet. “Maria’s in the city today!” was the only excuse you thought of every time they asked you. You had some errands to do that day, its something you find really boring and exhausting but you found yourself skipping to the bank. Skipping, not walking. 

At the tower, Bucky was a nervous wreck. He couldn’t focus much on what he was doing. He would zone out and forget what he was typing, then he remembered he wasn’t typing at all, he was fixing a floor plan. Sam being Sam, noticed how Boinky was acting. He kept teasing Bucky about being distracted while Steve kept asking him to stop. “What’s up with you, Buck? What’s making you zone out?” Steve asked, giving Bucky some water. Bucky just shrugged and continued whatever the hell he was doing. 

The evening came too fast for Bucky and too slow for you. You got home, got dressed to meet with Maria for dinner before seeing Bucky. When Bucky got home, he changed into something more casual and fixed himself at his bathroom. “Tell her tonight, you fucking idiot,” he told himself, looking at the mirror before grabbing his helmet and his old helmet that you proclaimed yours when you were hanging out before. He smiled at the memory then remembered that Dot never even got to see his motorcycle. Huh. 

He picked you up at the hotel that Maria was staying at. In a few minutes, you were at the bar that you two used to go to. You two bought a couple of drinks before going to the spot - your spot. You almost forgot how beautiful it was there, especially at night. 

“After tonight, you’ll only have one night of free drinks, use it wisely,” Bucky said, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, I’ll have to find another way to have free drinks from you,” you joked.

He looked at you, “You can just ask, you know? You don’t have to blackmail me,” he smiled. 

You laughed for a moment and it became silent once again. It felt... awkward. You two were seated a couple of inches away from each other, the closest you two have been since you avoided each other, but you wanted to get away. You remembered the last time you were here, in this exact same spot. Drinking the alcohol of your choice, laughing with Bucky, talking about your high school selves. Many things have changed since then. It feels so weird and new to you, sitting next to someone you genuinely like, your friend. You took a deep breath and stopped thinking. 

“I like you, did you know that?” you said out of the blue making Bucky wonder if he was just imagining it and he was just hearing things. He stayed silent, deciding that it was just his mind saying that cause that was what he wanted to hear.

You turned to Bucky, waiting for his reaction. Nothing. “Buck?” he turned and looked at you as if he hadn’t heard you. “I like you,” you said once again only this time, it was louder and clearer. 

“You like me?” Bucky asked, finding it hard to believe for some reason. “Like, you like-like me?” You nodded, smiling at his creased eyebrows and slightly tilted face, like a confused puppy. You almost didn’t notice how your heart is beating quickly as if it wanted to jump out of your chest. It was taking Bucky too long to reply, and that made you anxious. All you wanted was to take it back and change what you said. You should’ve said “I’d really like to go back to being close friends” or maybe ask him why he avoided you or somethi--

“Did Wanton ask you to tell this to me?” he asked with an accusative tone. “No, why would I agree to that? Even if I did, I’d only agree to say something like that if I really meant it,” your voice getting louder every word.

“So it’s true? You like me? Romantic styles?” You nodded, slightly annoyed that he would think that you would play with his feelings. “Yes, it’s no big deal. I just wanted to tell you, I don’t expect you to like me back. I just- I want you to--”

"I like you too. Romantic styles," he said holding your hand. "That was why I set you up with Loki, why I avoided you after that and why I was avoiding you until you invited me to join you and Pietro. I kinda got a bit… slightly, sort of jealous so I agreed to go with you."

"Wait, hold on, you like me... and you... set me up with Loki? I don't get it"

"I like you and… That doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is that you’re happy, and I'll do anything to make you happy,” he said, offering you a small smile.

☆

"Then we kissed and… yeah,” you smiled at your friends’ faltered smiles.

Sam stood up, “Why was everything else so detailed and the kiss was just ‘then we kissed’? What’s that about?” He said, grabbing more food from the table. "And, I fucking told you so, Boinks!" 

Bucky rolled his eyes, “Do you wanna hear how I kissed her softl-”

“Excuse me?” You said, raising your eyebrows at your boyfriend. “I kissed you, and it wasn’t soft”

“Y/N stop saying soft!” Peter shouted, covering his ears.

Wanda wiggled her eyebrows, "You didn't come home that night, hun."

"Yeah, I invited her to my place, we had some wine and we just talked for the rest of the night. Nothing happened. Okay? After talking we just slept. That's it,” Bucky defended.

Steve kept nodding his head, “Hence the Instagram story, mhmm, mhmm. Alright.”

“Whatever happened that night, I’m glad it did. And, I’m really really reallyyyyy happy for you, dumbasses,” Nat laughed.

Peter walked to you, “I’m happy for you too, sis. But please, don’t get detailed with… you know. I don’t need to know that.” You laughed, holding his hand. “And Bucky, if you ever hurt my sister, I’ll hunt you down and beat you up,” Peter looked at Bucky squinting his eyes, trying to look intimidating, which made Bucky laugh.

You looked at Bucky, “He’s serious. And very strong. He gave Steve bruises when they were boxing at the gym.” Bucky looked at Steve who was nodding.

“O-oh”

☆

taglist:

@intovert-gone-wild @jbb-bucky0310 @jessicakimba @mariachiii @essenceproxima @cazslaughter @eldahae @rororo06 @bonkyboinkybucky @a-hopeless-fan @danosaurushowell @hannibal-lecters-bitch @ceeellewrites @divainthesun @kseniiafirebrace @k-n-e @adriannajackson @connorhoez @fanfuckingtastic04 @cherthegoddess @captain-america5 @onlyjamesbuchananbarnes @writerwrites @lovinnholland @softboibarnes

[zhuhongs]

Upon rereading tgcf, one of the biggest complaints I have is how lackluster all the extra chapters were. literally none of them were good and all contained rlly gross and harmful sentiments (like the amnesia one which.. yea.. or all the things implying xl should get pregnant for hc thus equating gay relationships with hetero ones and playing into the wife thing and just GOD I HATE MXTX) 

There were a lot of little plot points i wish that had been further elaborated on more in the extras as opposed to hualian being ... like that. I had enough. Like mdzs had actaully good extras (minus the incense burners) that were nice side stories that elaborated more on the characters. Like the hook one with the juniors was so cute and i loved seeing them grow more. Or the lotus pod extras omg.. im such a lotus pod extra stan. those were so cute and gave us a lot of good insight into just how lovestruck lwj was during the times when he didn’t see wwx. mxtx should've stuck to those sorta extras in tgcf but NOOO. SO I have a list of so many other more interesting things those chapters couldve been spent on like:

A resolution on He Xuan’s revenge and his character arc. Bc its implied He Xuan is still hanging out and watching over sqx and that taking revenge didn’t fully satisfy him bc ok.. yea shi wudu is dead but he xuans family will never come back. Now what does he have to live for?? i wish we couldve seen a look into his life during the entire ordeal. like a chapter from his perspective while he was posing as Ming Yi  and maybe a look at a conversation btw he xuan and the real ming yi or a chapter after SQX was banished to see what he’s doing now. Also what did he xuan owe hua cheng money for anyways?? Like ik not every little thing has to be explained but I Want to Know. PLEASE more goth boyfriend content now I just wanna see him :,((

a better resolution of yin yu and quan yizhens storyline. im still mad abt how that plot point was split btw books 3 and 5  when it was rlly out of place and  there were other more pressing plot matters and it just rlly deserved more time. Also i thought yin yu died!?!?!? but apparently one of the extras says he’s alive and man... i;m not reading any more of the extras to see that, give me a full yin yu and quan yizhen chapter.. fuck.

a day in the life of the guoshi fangxin or general hua PLEASE especially like one where hua cheng was SO CLOSE to meeting xie lian but had no clue that xie lian was there at the time but the two did smth that inadvertantly helped the other and they still were connected even though they hadnt met omg pls that’d be so nice. like imagine Hua cheng catching a glimpse of the guoshi in public in yong’an while he’s trying to follow some lead that points to xie lian or maybe following a lead to capture qi rong bc he said he knew qi rong was a part of the yong’an stuff and originally thought the guoshi was one of qi rongs pawns. like can you IMAGINE him getting so close. but at the last second he did smth small that impacted xie lian. like they bumped into eachother on the street or smth. god i’d go crazy

OR vice versa.. like a day in the life of the young ghost king hua cheng. Like again, one of my biggest issues was that hua cheng just knew everything and its never really explained how he got all of that info. like yes he’s been alive very long and has eyes and ppl working for him everywhere but like... how did he build that network?? I’d love to see a chapter of young ghost king hua cheng travelling around trying to learn as much as he can abt the world and how it can help bring him to xie lian. and the two maybe are in the same kingdom for a bit and they don’t meet exactly but hua cheng stops some fight or something and helps xie lian indirectly or maybe xie lian is performing on the street in some costume and hua cheng doesn’t recognize him and smiles and gives him a coin or smth. idk i’m just dying for any sorta extra chapter or fic like that. i’m honestly so tempted to write my own but i cant write

also!! we’ve seen how xie lian picks up people down on their luck near him and show them kindness (like banyue, lang ying, xiao ying, he tried to with san lang but we know how that ended lmao) so i’d love to see another little vignette of him doing that on his travels and how every person he meets teaches him smth about life and being a good person and idk, i just think it’d be rlly sweet. i love this facet of his character and feel like we didn’t see enough of it towards the end.

ALSO hua cheng only seems to respect one heavenly official besides xie lian and thats yushi huang.. i assume thats mostly bc she was the only one to help xie lian and let him use the rain master hat to bring water to yong’an. I was thinking maybe when he was a new supreme he had run into trouble and maybe was picked up by the rain master and helped him heal and in return he promised to help protect her village from harm in the future. Like i know a heavenly official wouldn’t cooperate with a ghost like that but yushi huang is different and doesn’t really care about the heavens so i think she would protect him if he could do something to benefit her village. ik this is kinda far fetched but when he first became a supreme I’m sure a bunch of ppl probably tried to mess with him and didn’t rlly believe him to be undefeatable bc he hadn’t proved himself yet also i doubt all his power came overnight. he had to learn how to use it once he escaped the kiln. and some group probably thought they could weaken him somehow. I’m thinking maybe a rlly well formed group of ghosts actually caught him off guard once and he had to retreat and was picked up by the rain master and stayed with her and learned from her a bit. i think it’d be a cool concept also i just rlly want more yushi huang content and i’m on their friendship agenda bc he rlly did seem to actually respect her when she first appeared and i think it’d be cool if the two had some history together.

Also idrc if this was addressed I couldve missed it But!! Did xie lian ever tell Hua cheng that the reason he got the curse shackles and was banished again in the first place wasnt bc jun wu wanted to punish him, but because he requested it. And specifically requested it bc he felt guilty abt letting wu ming take the human face disease and disperse for his sake. So he took the shackles and descended to atone for that?? Bc I dont recall hua cheng learning that bc his soul was already dispersed at that point so it didnt follow him and xie lian didnt say anything so uhhh... someone should tell hua cheng that. Like I dont think xie lian rlly said how much hua cheng meant to him and didnt show him he was loved in grand ways. Like xie lian did always care for bc in other ways but I think if hua cheng learned abt this on screen it wouldve been such a great moment and I'm rlly surprised mxtx didnt address this iirc!?!? Like imagine jun wu telling Hua cheng this in the kiln bc xie lian wouldnt say it himself. Imagine how cool that would be.

Also a small thing adding into the whole young ghost king Hua cheng stuff. Its implied and p much stated that hua cheng isnt his real name. That he likely doesnt have a real name bc his parents died? (It's not clear. I'm still mad at mxtx for not making his childhood clearer). So I'd like to see when and why hua cheng chose that name for himself. The new tgcf ending song kinda hints at its meaning with the lyrics "for you I'd fill a city of flowers" as xie lian is the flower wielding martial god so it's probably inspired by that. Also xie lian saved hua cheng from leaping off the city walls but I'd love to hear him say it bc the implication of his name didnt dawn on me for quite a bit and I dont know if everyone made the connection. Again I sure as hell didnt. So itd be cool to see a chapter that takes place in his past after just ascending as a supreme

Overall I rlly think tgcf had a lot more potential to be even better and a lot of that comes down to fleshing out the side characters and letting hualian have more of a storyline independent of one another. like i know the appeal and message of tgcf is that through love, people can overcome anything, but fuck man. i just wanna see what these two (mostly hua cheng) where like in the absence of each others presence. Part of what I really liked abt mdzs is that we got to see that longing develop btw wangxian when the two weren’t together and how they thought about each other and did things in thei others spirit bc they knew the other wouldve done the same thing. but whatever, mxtx was too consumed by her own unhealthy idea of what devotion and true love looks like but still. i rlly think the extras couldve helped the story be better rather than be fujoshi fuel that i try to bleach from my mind -_-

[sour-n-salty-citrus]

Morty and Rick for your new ask game :-)

Hi anon! :D I already did Rick, but I'll do Mor-turtle too ^3^

Favourite thing about them: He's just such a good kid! He's so smart- as in emotionally intelligent!!! I will always advocate the importance of emotional intelligence because its such an underrated but vital part of our lives. Like, can Morty do an 8th grade math equation? Probably not. But can he read people really well and see through their actions and words? Yeah! I love how kind and sweet and gentle he is, and that's something I really treasure in his character. Like yeah he's become pretty jaded by everything, but he still does his best to be understanding and show compassion towards others. He knows what it's like to be the "little people", so he looks out for them. He's not afraid to stand up for others and speak out about his ethical concerns. He's always looking out for his family, especially his mother and sister. His idea of an ideal adventure is a cutesy fantasy setting where he goes on quests to help townspeople and meet all kinds of interesting characters. He's the glue that binds everyone together. Even when one of the family is being an ass to him and he gets upset, he'll still forgive them pretty quickly, cause he's just good natured like that. He's just always really optimistic and energetic and hopeful, and I admire and adore his character for that! It's easy to be an asshole, it's harder to be kind. He's not perfect, and he's done messed up and wrong things too, but he tries hard often to stick to his principles and do the right thing, and I love him for that!

Least favourite thing about him: haha, @necklace-of-sin puts this well, in that I kind of wish he wouldn't detach himself from Rick so easily. It's clear Rick needs Morty, so it'd kind of be nice to see something implying the reverse, too. Idk, just more moments showing how important Rick really is to Morty, and that he really does want him in his life, not out of a sense of obligation because "he's family", but because he really does want Rick around.

Favourite line: "A vat of fake acid? Are you dying of dementia?!"

BrOTP: Summer and Morty for liiiife! I love when these two team up, sibling teams are always the best >:0 !!!

OTP: yeah ,,, its rickmorty (im sure that's a surprise(!))

NOTP: uhhH i guess either Morty x Jerry or Beth. Other than that I'm down to read p much whatever.

Random Headcanon: Morty has brown eyes! It's not a very original headcanon, but it's a hill I will die on.

Unpopular opinion: I don't really like how Morty lost his virginity (at least I'm assuming) to Planetina. Idk it's just that they NEVER would have allowed it if the genders were reversed- or at least maybe addressed how problematic it is. Like- I read dark fiction because I can seperate fiction and reality, but this scene bothers me because I know that (a disturbing amount) of people aren't bothered by it just because Morty is a boy and Planetina is a woman, and still hold that mentality irl. (And maybe that's more of a fandom problem than a character one but yeah... it kiiind of felt like Morty was being groomed, and I've read fics like that, but the difference is at the authors acknowledged it for what it was.)

Song I associate with them: Cry Baby by The Neighbourhood.

Favourite picture of them: Aw man i have so many good images of Morty saved, but it has to be the classic: