#if you saw the original no you didn't i realized i didn't add everything i wanted

[ryker-writes]

To add more angst to your Sibling Vil headcanons, what's if the reader is the one who overblots instead of Vil, after he basically ruins their confidence and realizes Vil has some resentment toward them? Revealing in their overblot form that they never even wanted to be famous and only did it for Vil's approval

yesss the angst I live for it!

For those who didn't see the original post you can fine it here. (Let me know if link doesn't work)

Vil's broken sibling relationship (alternate ending)

when Vil did hang out with you, he would always point out some small thing about you that was out of place

even if you had everything together, he would find something to criticize

afterwards he would always make a comment about how you should be careful because your actions reflect on him and your father

sometimes he would even give you a backhanded compliment or when he was especially angry, he would straight up insult you and claim he's trying to help you

it became very clear that Vil hated you

hated how you acted and how you looked

you two used to get along

he even helped you become who you were today

when you were young, he would always help you with how to act or how to look right for all the cameras

he carefully help you and taught you back then

but now he was openly insulting you and hating you

according to Vil, you were many things

you were an idiot for not being able to understand or see the simplest things

you were naïve and stupid for not realizing that your friends only liked you because of your fame

you were annoying

you were lazy

you were ugly

your own brother said all this to you

the only person you thought you could truly rely on, hated you

maybe he was right about you

maybe all those things were true

everyone else probably say you like that

now it was so much easier to pay attention to all the negative publicity you got

Vil was right

you wish it wasn't him that said it, but he was right

it's safe to say that your confidence wasn't doing too great lately

and as you walked through the school halls, it felt like everyone was watching you with criticizing eyes

like they were just waiting for you to embarrass yourself

and when you did, they would be watching, recording, and laughing

so lost in your own thoughts, you weren't paying much attention to where you were going

and you ran into him

your dear brother who hated everything about you

of course, he started criticizing you again

and in front of everyone

"Looks like you're even worse than I thought if you can't even pay attention to where you're walking. You look more unsightly today than usual. You really can't get anything right can you?"

the students around you two started whispering, some even snickered

they were talking about you

you could just tell

it was too much

everything they were saying was too much

you couldn't be here

not with them, not with Vil

you backed away from Vil with tears in your eyes

and you looked directly at him

the cold and uncaring expression clear on his face

thinking back on it, did he ever even care?

was he only ever helping you because your father was forcing you two to be in the spotlight

did he only help you because he couldn't be seen next to someone so hideous?

how horrible it all was

your life, your image, your thoughts, you

for just one moment you wished they would all stop talking, stop talking about you

without even thinking you sent one spell, a simple spell, in Vil's general direction

and that was enough

enough for the air to suddenly feel so thin and an overwhelming sense of dread flooded through you

the world seemed darker

like someone had dimmed everything down

but the whispers got louder and louder until it turned into shouting

they all hated you

it was clear

you just had to accept and give in

Vil was right

you could feel liquid running down your cheeks

reaching up, you went to wipe away the tears

but when you pulled your hand back, you saw black

those weren't really tears

it was blot covering your hand

and it wouldn't stop running down your cheeks like a river that never ends

it ran down your hands and even covered your arms

you could feel it run along your skin and even drip down to the ground

but none of that even mattered right now

Vil stood in front of you now looking shocked

everyone else scrambled to get away from you

of course they did

"You should be proud, Vil. They all love you, and would never run away from you."

he pulled out his magical pen

"You're even incredibly stupid when you overblot. You can't even see how much they love you more than me. They've said that you're the most beautiful. You don't even work that hard and you get amazing opportunities. Meanwhile spend every hour of every day trying to be the best."

looking down at yourself, you could see that your clothes have even changed

beautifully designed clothes were in the place of your old ones

drops of blots swirled down your clothes, and somehow made them look nicer

Vil said they called you the most beautiful, but he's also told you how ugly you were in the past

how could he suddenly change his words like that

they obviously didn't like you that much

they constantly talk and even now avoid you

it made you angry

Vil has been nothing but cruel to you

you couldn't control it

and you lashed your magic at him

he was able to dodge some of your attacks and even started attacking you

your anger just kept building up

"Are you serious? You made me like this. You helped guide me when we were younger. I never even wanted any of those roles! I never wanted to live like this!"

you sent a particularly strong attack his way and he took it full force

Vil staggered back, disheveled and wounded from the fight so far

but your attacks just kept coming and only grew in intensity

"All I ever wanted was for you to just accept me, to like me. But ever since we started growing up you've done nothing but hate me."

it was getting harder to see and hear what was happening

ink plagued all your senses

and all you felt was anger

when you next opened your eyes, everything was blurry for a second

your body felt weak and it hurt to even move

but when your vision cleared, you could see that you were in the school infirmary

and sitting next to your bed was Vil

he seemed to notice you were awake

"How are you feeling?"

despite his calm tone, Vil looked rough

still beautiful as always, but a well trained eye could see the way his hair was slightly out of place and makeup ever so slightly smudged in the corners

he had been here a while

once again you could feel water run down your cheeks

you quickly reached up to wipe it away and looked at your hands

it was actual water this time, not blot

Vil sighed and grabbed your hand

"I'm sorry."

a heavy silence hung in the air afterwards

a million things that he wanted to say

things he needed to say

but right now, he couldn't find the words

so Vil promised himself that he would be able to tell you everything and that he'd do everything he can to try to fix what both he and his father had broken

[redactedrem]

You know what? Fuck you. *Ponifies Batman*

Guys I'm so excited to share my newest project of ponifying the Batfam, it started out small with the hypothetical "I wonder what Batman would be like in a mlp universe." And then the project kept getting bigger and bigger.

If anyones interested in my world building/ headcanons surrounding this project, you can see it under the cut. (I didn't want to make the post too long.)

Incase anybody couldn't read my bad handwriting, I gotchuuu.

-(First pic) Bruce Wayne: Bruce had got his cutiemark the night of his parents death, after the grief had broken his spirit and he realized that he never wanted anypony else to feel the same pain as he does. (He has a fake cutiemark to cover up his obvious destiny)

- The first pic is pretty self explanatory, but I want to make it clear that Bruce's destiny isn't "My parents are dead so now I dress up as a bat and beat up mentally ill folk". Because I've seen people on here give hot takes on cutiemarks that directly link them to a ponies destiny.

This goes for specifically in the mlp fandom but (for the sake of being on topic) I'll use the the example of that one post where someone gave the hot take that Jason would get his cutiemark in the warehouse right before he dies (or after he dies? smthing like that) because "It would be really fucked up to know that you were always destined to die." And listen, I can appreciate some good Jason Todd whump as the next guy but knowing that this would be based in a mlp universe . . . just doesn't sit right with me.

It sounds less magical that way. Its like saying that Rainbow Dash was always meant to be the fastest flyer, so theres no point in trying to compete with her. So uhm, trying to stay on topic here. My personal hot take is that a pony's cutiemark is symbol of something that they do/ a skill or talent that they have that makes them happy. And whats a more magical and fulfilling destiny than doing something that makes you happy for the rest of your life?

Looping back to Bruce, he didn't get his cutiemark the moment his parents died, but I like to think that he got it sometime later on in the night. After hours of being checked on by the police, getting looked at by the paramedics, and after Alfred took him home. Its 1:40ish in the morning and tiny foal-Bruce is just staring at his bedroom wall feeling numb and dissociated to hell. And sometime after processing everything that night- he just decides that this is the worst thing that has ever happened to him and that he will do anything to make sure that nopony will ever feel the same pain that he has felt. And then-- Ta da!! Cutiemark!! Too bad neither he or Alfred got to experience the excitement when they both saw it the next day :')

(Edit: I didn't know where to put this detail, but Bruce's fake cutiemark is based off of the "Make It Wayne" TV logo from this fanfic here )

-(Second pic) The Bat: This is heavily inspired by Flutterbat, I know theres canonically already a race of bat ponies made from Lunas stunt as Nightmare Moon. But I chose to go through with the Flutterbat route because batponies are a race, and have bat-like features 24/7. In comparison Fluttershy maintains her pegasus appearance by day and transforms into Flutterbat at night (ALSO with there being implications that there are "Triggers" for her transformations in the day too!!) Which adds the "Vampire." right in front of her batpony title.

I might do a lil comparison chart between vampire batponies and regular batponies in the future or something. But for now I'm focusing on my batpony Bruce Wayne headcanons so yea. My point is that I felt like making Bruce a "vampire" batpony would give him a more solid secret identity with also the bonus of a really metal origin story.

Now we all know that the canonical origin story of batman is that a few months after the tragedy of his parents death, Bruce had fallen into a cave? a well? a pit? of bats and triggered a fear of bats since then. Later on he decides to become Batman so he can invoke the fear of bats he once had into the criminals of Gotham. Yadda yadda yadda.

Now canonically, we don't know the exact science on how Fluttershy turned into Flutterbat. What we do know is that at the time, pony magic is not researched enough for Twilight to be aware that Fluttershys "Stare" is her own form of pony magic and that it would interfere with Twilights spell.

Do you see where I'm getting at here? Uhmm don't ask me what exactly happened in the cave, I'm doing this for fun and thinking about it too hard makes me spiral. But uhmm something something- Bruce looked at a bat in the eye and decided to embrace his biggest fear to fuel his cause, and his already traumatized and fucked up pony magic had transformed his body- something something. (Edit: I didn't think about this until now but maybe Fluttershys "Stare" and Bruces "Bat Glare" could be a usage of the same form of magic? Just a thought)

I'll probably come up with a more suitable explanation in the future, but like I said. All of this is just for fun.

[nekoannie-chan]

I won’t wait for you

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Reader (past).

Word count: 371 words.

Rating: Teen.

Summary: You don’t need Steve.

Major Tags: Angst, mention of cheating.

Additional tags: This is my entry to @caplanbuckybarnes Weekly Writing Challenge! #1 with the prompt:

"You don't get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms."

@saiyanprincessswannie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission for my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish:  Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter. 

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme @bluemusickid @leyannrae @harrysthiccthighss @marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1 @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted @chemtrails-club  @marigoldreamer @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @here4thefanfics @theestorm @patzammit @kmc1989 @somegirlfromasgard @rogersbarber

You gave a biscuit to your daughter Sarah and another one to the puppy that was only a few weeks old that you had just adopted after the little one had been begging you for more than a month for a pet. You just couldn't say "no" to her; she actually looked a lot like Steve. Although that didn't bother you, you just kept pretending he didn't exist anymore.

You didn't notice that someone was watching them in the park; nothing seemed suspicious, not even when he started following you.

"Y/N, “Steve called out to you.

For a split second, you stopped but immediately kept walking, even though Steve caught up with them.

“Y/N, it's been a long time," Steve said.

“Who is he? “your daughter asked.

“An old work colleague," you replied. “I don't have anything to talk to you about," you mumbled quietly enough so your daughter wouldn't hear.

Steve turned to look at the girl, who looked a little dismayed, and then at the puppy. He stepped aside; it wasn't the time to talk.

You looked at the clock; it was eleven o'clock in the morning, and it wasn't time for Clarice to come home from school with your daughter. John and Clarice were busy taking all the children who were mutants back home after school.

You opened the door and closed it later, but Steve wouldn't allow it.

“Why didn't you tell me I have a daughter?“ Steve reproached you.

"You don't get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms."

“You just disappeared."

“I saw what you did with Sharon; I had planned that after you got Bucky to safety, I was going to tell you, you know, we don't need you; you'd better go," you said.

"Everything is all right?“ Lorna stepped in; you hadn't even realized when they'd arrived.

“I think you should leave, Rogers; you're not welcome here," Wanda said.

Steve looked down and turned to leave.

“I can still take Sarah for the ice cream I promised her, right?“ Wanda asked, not taking her eyes off the road.

“Sure, she hasn't stopped talking about it since you told her."

[cookieswithay]

🎄Christmas Rottmnt...headcanonsish!

(🎅Rated E for everyone!)

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• Leo, the snowman☃️

• "Okay, my little mistletoe~"

• Leo purred (with his usual charming smile.) He set his hands on the box. Sticking his fingers directly under the seams of the wrapping paper.

• "Let's see what you got me."

• With one motion, ALL the wrapping paper torn was off. Super confused and a little impressed, you looked too Donnie.

• "Leo has the "perfect" method to remove wrapping paper."

• He replied, deadpan. You snickered and looked back at your boyfriend, waiting for his reaction.

• He raised it up.

• "What's this?"

• He asked, softly. You cleared your throat. Time for the present's dramatic origin story! You sat down next to him.

• "I noticed whenever you post your "champion" pictures on Tok Tik, you only have shades and a robe hanging off of you."

• You looked down and tugged a loose thread out of your jeans.

• "So, I bought you a crown."

• "It'll look nice on you."

• ...That didn't sound nearly as powerful as it did in your head.

• Leo closed his mouth and put the his crown back in the box. He just stared at with a neutral expression. You looked around.

• "...Do you like it-?"

• The moment those words left your mouth, you were smooched and spun around in the air.

• "Oh my gosh! You are so thoughtful!"

• Leo shouted, still spinning you. You said a dizzy "yer welcome" and he finally stopped.

• "Hold on, I got the perfect thing."

• He said. He rummaged through his jean pockets. And out came the pinnacle of Christmas traditions.

• "Mistletoe~"

• Your cheeks burned. He's not gonna set you free in awhile.

🎄

• Donnie claus🎅

• "You're my secret Santa, right?"

• Donnie asked. You nodded quickly. That was his, alright. You made the "go on" motion. Normally, you're not one to rush, but you were dying to see his reaction. Noticing your eagerness, he snickered and slowly peeled the wrapping paper away.

• He looked closer.

• "Lou jitsu: the video game?"

• You slid next to him, bumping his shoulder.

• "Uh-huh. But unlike the original that only pixels, this is remastered."

• You replied, rolling the R. Noticing all the brothers looked puzzled, you decided to go with the simple yet awesome explanation. You stood up.

• "Let's just say I persuaded Jace into remaking the game this Christmas."

• You said with a smug smile. Obviously, you let your fist do the talking. You're real, like that. Donnie shot up next to you.

• "You shook down the purple dragons for me?"

• You nodded.

• "Even got 'im add to a dlc."

• "Plot written by me, of course."

• D took a breath, kissed you on the cheek, and headed towards the bathroom.

• "Where are you going?"

• Mikey asked. (Already tearing into his present.)

• "Too much eggnog."

• Donnie said, tearfully.

🎄

• Mikey, the red nosed reindeer🦌

• "Wow...it's so big!"

• Mikey laughed. He shook the box around. Which was bad for the gift.

• "Is it just one thing or a bunch of doohickeys?"

• You clamped your hands over his, your chest on his shell.

• "Just open it and find out."

• You said calmly, hiding your nervousness well. He nodded and got to shredding. He was gobsmacked when he saw the shinier box underneath.

• "Oh. Me. Gosh."

• "The Jupiter Jim super awesome fan box!?"

• You nodded, a little smile on your face. You gifted all the boys (and Splinter) Jupiter Jim stuff, but...your boyfriend got the best one.

• "Aw, what?"

• Leo whined in the background. You weren't sure why he was pouting. You got him the BIG set of JJ posters.

• "Posters, stickers, comic books,"

• "Ah! It's got everything!"

• Mikey looked at you with a HUGE smile. You suddenly lost your footing and was pulled into a very tight hug.

• "You're the nicest, sweetest, nicest, person ever."

• He gushed into your shoulder. You kissed him on the cheek and then realized your leg kinda hurts...Did this boy trip you?

🎄

• Raph Frost❄

• "Can I take off the blindfold now?"

• Raph asked, reaching for it. You answered with a sharp 'no' and he totally stopped. He was pretty confused since wrapping paper is enough to cover a gift. Why all the secrecy? After some scuffling and scolding Splinter for trying to "taste test" the gift, you put your hand on Raph's.

• "Okay...you can take it off now."

• You said, quietly. He snatched the 'fold off and looked down. His mouth instantly watered.

• "You made me a cake!?"

• You nodded, getting shy. You wiped your hands wiped on your apron.

• "Funds were kinda low this year, so I could only make you somethi-"

• Raph pulled you close.

• (With one hand, mind you.)

• "Are you kidding? I can't wait to eat this circle of festive goodness!"

• "Donnie grab the plates!"

• You felt, lowkey overwhelmed. You were expecting an awkward 'thank you' and the silent treatment. But...he's super happy. About an edible gift!?

• "You're okay with gift you can only have today!?"

• You asked, still squished against his plastron.

• "Of course, I got it from you after all."

• That one sentence...melted your frozen heart. Why is he the absolute sweetest?...But, it's just for today though! You sighed and laid into on his front shell.

• "Merry Christmas, ya dork."

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Merry Christmas! This was a last minute post, but I'm glad I did it. Did you notice the difference of each reader? I hope so. Please be merry and reblog! That would make me happy. Stay warm today everyone🥰

(Reblog list: @usoppsstar, @takibikaen, @futuristicmage, @whattraintracks, @cottoncandyclown123,)

(Most of those people are the ones who read part 2 and 1 of Donnie 0 recently. Sorry if I missed you. Merry Christmas!)

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[metaltangodiva]

what are your thoughts on the different 'versions' of Krauser as well his various dynamics with Leon? Also do you have any advice for like...not being afraid to add your own interpretations and spins to characters? Like i think i care way too much about what people would think, so i'm a but scared to start posting anything, but at the same time I'd love to add to the fic collection lol

Hello hello~!

I wanna preface this quickly by saying I'm fucking unable to summarize anything, lmao. This turned out to be TWO ESSAYS.

I'll start by replying to the second question, because I sorta realized, about halfway through the answer, that I was writing a fucking essay on Metaltango and I didn't wanna overlook the second point of your message. Because it's super important to me, as a writer (amateur/hobbyist, but writer nonetheless) that people who want to write can do it.

And my suggestion is super easy: do it. Write the thing.

I know it's hard, I went through it too. It's hard to not compare yourself to other people, to go and think "man, they're not gonna like how I portray them". When I started writing "Normal", that was my worry. I was taking these badass, gun-toting, zombie-killing, masculine characters and putting them into a situation that's not only opposite to that, but pretty damn taboo in general. I've had Comments™. But whatever.

And what I tell people, when they say they're worried about how their stories are gonna be received, maybe because it takes a weird non-canon spin, or they feel their tropes are overdone, is:

Do it anyways. There's only you to craft that story you wanna see the way you want it; no one else can do it the exact same, even with the same prompts, the same tropes, the same characters. Everyone views things differently, and I think it's an amazing thing when it comes to art, well... almost everything, honestly. A saying that goes in a Discord server I hang out on is "there's nothing original anymore", but not in a bad way at all — so many works have the same themes, and yet they all still stand out somehow.

I might not the audience. This guy next to me might be, though! Or who knows, maybe *I* am the audience!

But you don't know any of this until you write it. Do it.

OKAY SO I GUESS THAT WAS PART ONE, lol.

SO LET'S GOO FOR PART TWO!

My thoughts on the different versions: I love them! Each version and each game brings something new to the table. I got started with RE4 (VR) — I liked how *aggressively homoerotic* that knife fight was.

Since it was my entry point to RE as a whole, I was curious as to *who* Krauser was, what was his relation to Leon, what happened between them, so on, so forth. Probably what a lot of people went through before Darkside Chronicles became a thing. His obsession for Leon and especially the *passion* behind it. Surely what happened between them was personal!

Then I heard of Darkside Chronicles and I had to play it for myself. So I did. And I was positively surprised when I saw Krauser as he was back around 2002. Gruff, rough around the edges, but just as snarky as Leon — and I love snarky characters. I felt their humor meshed so well. The "boy scout" exchange has lived rent-free in my head since I heard it. Same with the shared water bottle/indirect kiss. The snake/butterfly. Krauser starting as kinda dismissive of Leon, but quickly wisening up about it and treating him as an equal (and I feel it's more than that). And this became what I really wanted to see between them on the long run, hence why I started writing the AU "Normal" takes place in. They were such a good team, in spite of Krauser's wildly varying emotions.

Then RE4R came out, and it introduced them in a mentor/trainee relationship and I love that too. It's a whole different dynamic; Krauser's more serious but still does not shut up, Leon is still a smart mouth — I guess they clashed a lot overall and Leon can probably thank Krauser for all the extra push-ups and laps that gave him this *chef kiss* physique... but Krauser has a soft side to him. The guy really cared for his men, but as an instructor, as a soldier, as a superior and also as a human, probably couldn't voice it all too well. I cried when Leon picked up Krauser's knife, kneeled next to him and Krauser told him he was proud of him. That he had trained him well. It's a dynamic I wish I could capture well enough to put in words, but my real-life experience with anything army-related is nonexistent (well, so is my ageplay/military/"life as a couple" experience with "Normal", lol) and I feel I'd have a harder time with portraying it how I want to. So... I'm eventually gonna do it, outside of oneshots.

TLDR: Give me all the Krausers. They all bring something to the table <3

[suhfics]

Hide and Seek

Pairing: Jeno x reader

Word count: 8.6k

Contains: dumb shit that the characters did, a bit of humor, endless college parties, cigarettes, alcohol, brief mention of addiction, angst, fluff(?), Jaehyun Kun Hendery Jisung and Chenle cameo, mostly 00-line with Mark, i think that's all.

a/n: I finally finished this omygod i swear it took me so many months because if not for the writer's block, the characters just add and add and add scenes! This is longer than I originally planned and I hope I did it justice. and I rlly hope the ending is okay because I suck at writing endings. In no way am I promoting smoking, but if you do smoke pls do it moderately! There will be inaccuracies so pls do forgive me for that. Anw hope u enjoy this one as much as I enjoyed writing it!

It took you exactly 4 months, 23 days, 19 hours, and 58 seconds to realize that you have moved on from your recent ex. You're precisely sure because you had a tracker. And a journal.. and a jar full of paper cranes that you have folded everyday whilst thinking about how you miss the guy. 

But today is the third day you ditched folding cranes, and there are also three pages in your heartbreak journal that are still empty. 

Your stopwatch has finally stopped and you are very determined to celebrate it with your best friends. And so you called up Renjun, can't wait to declare that you are finally done crying for a boy you used to know. 

"We're actually at Seb's! You should come!" He was practically screaming into the phone, trying to drown out the loud background noise from the club and Haechan's noisy ass bickering with someone. It's probably Jaemin. Not a surprise. 

"Is that Mark I hear?" You asked right after you heard a series of laughter, too familiar and too funny not to notice. 

"Yeah!! We met them here!! Enough talking and come over here already!!" Renjun /was/ shouting. Was it that loud there? 

That question was answered by Haechan screaming "MARK LEEEEE!" 

Yep. Definitely loud over there. 

"Be right there!" You answered enthusiastically before hanging up. 

You wore the sexiest party dress you have because you felt like going wild tonight. Pairing it with a comfy yet cute heels because you know you'd be hitting the dance floor. Completing the look with a clean makeup 'cause you didn't want mascara and foundation dripping down your face later. 

The night was still young when you arrived at Seb's. People were already dancing, others just chilling in their own booths. And your people were easy to spot because they had a blue haired Mark. 

"Y/N! Finally!! God what took you so long?!" Haechan's drunken noisy ass clinged onto you for dear life. Half dragging you towards their booth while you try to carry a fourth of his weight. 

Renjun gives you a shot of vodka, "Presenting, the newly reformed woman of the year! Y/N! A round of applause everyone!" He was even raising his own shot glass before drinking it, bottoms up. And every single one of them followed. 

Renjun and Haechan were your best friends since high school. You took a different course in college, hence their new friends. Mark, Jaemin, and Jeno. They all took the same course and just clicked. You hangout with them but not as often as they do with each other. But it wasn't a problem. You have your own circle as well where Renjun and Haechan can join too from time to time. 

You sat next to Mark then started teasing him with the blue hair. "Last time I saw you, you were blonde!" 

"Well you don't see me often! You should have seen it in green!" 

The drinks were overflowing, your company taking shots after shots of whatever was offered on the table. Renjun's at another booth, mingling with... you don't know who. You, Haechan, Mark, and Jaemin were on the dancefloor dancing the night away. And Jeno offered to stay in your booth— Jeno! Right! You should probably accompany the guy. Seize the opportunity to get closer with him because he's very much quiet. The guy basically just smiles at everything anyone says. 

You left the dancefloor to go to your booth where Jeno is, but saw only Renjun and another person making out on the couch. Jeno was nowhere in sight. 

You decided not to bother the two and tried to find Jeno in the crowd. 

Hmm... black hair, undercut, tall, and what was he wearing again? Ah! Leather jacket and a white shirt underneath. 

Yet Jeno was nowhere to be seen inside. So you decided to expand the search. Actually, you have a choice to just stay put in your booth. Jeno's a big boy, he knows how to find his way back. But maybe it's the alcohol in your system that pushed you to find the lost pup. 

Luckily for you, the lost pup was just outside the backdoor, in an alley. A cigarette in between two fingers. 

"There you are!" You pushed with your body to fully open the heavy backdoor. "I've been looking for you!" 

And like a criminal caught in the act, he threw away the cigarette. Stepping on it to fully extinguish the stick. "You were?" 

"Why'd you stop? Afraid I'll snitch you? Hmm?" You teased. Your friends didn't know Jeno smoked. It's just that one time, after a party, you caught him taking a hit. And he begged you not to tell the nosy bunch. That was the last time you had a five-sentence conversation with him. 

"You can smoke though. I don't really mind." You gestured for him to continue. 

"Is this a test?" He joked. His face morphed into showing that famous eye smile of his. It was pure contrast to his black leather jacket and ripped jeans. His fit screamed violence while his face whispered kindness. It was utter confusion on your part. 

"Oh yes, definitely. Take that hit and I'll tell Haechan about it." He laughed at your retort. "You'll never hear the end of it, Mr. Lee." You snickered. 

"What a snitch." He narrowed his eyes on you yet still keeping that smile on his face. Then proceeding to put another cigarette in between his lips. "You don't mind, do you?" He asks. 

"No, I don't," you said while kicking a few small rocks around your feet. "I do mind getting second hand lung disease though," You teased and he acted offended at that. Even putting his hand on his chest. 

"I'm feeling very guilty right now," he said. Slack-jawed. 

You elbowed his side, "I'm kidding! Go on. I don't mind at all." The two of you shared a laugh before he continued to light the one in his mouth. 

It was the first time again after a few months that Jeno Lee laughed with you. The first being the one when you caught him smoking in Haechan's garden. 

"Jeno Lee," you called. He immediately turned to you, putting the cigarette in between his fingers. 

Actually, you didn't have anything to say. You just tested out how his name rolled out of your mouth. And honestly? You liked it. 

Jeno Lee... maybe it's the surname. 

What if it's Haechan who is also a Lee? Heachan Lee... Mark Lee? 

Nope. It's not in the surname. It's the whole 'Jeno Lee'. 

Jeno Lee. 

"Y/N?" Jeno nudges you. And you realized that you've just recited his whole ass name three times in your head. Now you have to say something because you've just called out Jeno Lee's name— aand there it is again. 

"Oh! Nothing. I was just thinking about what smoking feels like..." You made it up. Of course, why would you say you spaced out because you liked his name? 

He hummed. And then brought the cigarette in between his fingers near you. "Wanna try?" 

He had that look on his face that was very much enticing to try out whatever it is he asks you to do. 

But the thing is... you actually want to try it out. 

Ohh, Haechan's going to scold you for this. 

You nodded and hesitantly put the death stick in between your lips. And not even a complete inhale, you coughed and coughed and you felt like it would never end. Jeno Lee—that devil in disguise—was just laughing at you coughing out batches of translucent smoke. 

"I'm never gonna put that hideous thing in my mouth again," you said in finality while you were coughing and he was laughing. 

And that was the start of you hanging out with Jeno Lee every free time. Odd that despite the differences of your courses, you almost had the same schedule of vacancies as him. Sometimes, Mark and Jaemin join you both but more often than not, it was only you and Jeno. And his small pack of unlit cig. 

It was your little secret with Jeno. Just like how you keep Haechan's big fat crush on this guy from lit class 101, and Renjun making out with the TA from his summer class. Obviously these secrets outdo Jeno's but... still, secrets are secrets. And you like keeping them. 

Your hangouts are mostly just Jeno smoking while you either do your plates or read. You don't actually mind the second hand smoke, you just feel like you should be there whenever he takes out the cig. When Jaemin is around and Jeno can't smoke, he just helps you study. 

Today, he's doing both. 

A set of flashcards in hand and an unlit stick in between his fingers, Jeno decided to help you study because he noticed the dark circles under your eyes. 

"Are they that noticeable?" You panicked. You've already covered them with concealer and a full coverage foundation but he still saw them! Maybe you should change makeup brands... 

"Not really, I just have keen eyes." 

You rolled your eyes at him. "Yeah, sure. You can't even read that signage anymore. Just go get glasses, Mr. Lee." You pointed to the 'do not enter' signage that was just a few meters away from you. 

"Lucky you I'm wearing contacts today." It made you look into his eyes to see the brown colored contacts he usually wears when he's the designated driver... 

and there were.. shivers? 

You just made a face and started clearing up the table you both were occupying. The exam you were studying for will start in a few, and Jeno staring at you with eyes smiling was either motivation or distraction. You just... weren't sure. Maybe next time you should be asking Renjun to quiz you. 

"Oh we're done?" Jeno asked. It was the simplest question, yet it took you five good seconds to answer. 

"Yep." You were sure you had a panic stricken face. It was the first time you felt flushed in front of this guy. THIS guy! 

You saw how his face turned from happy to confused. And he just looked like a lost puppy again. 

"Professor Randall doesn't accept late people during exams. I wouldn't want to waste my hard worked eye bags right?" You tried to crack a joke to hide the nervousness in you. 

Nervous? Because of THIS guy? Nah, it's just the exams. Yeah it is. Yeah... it is. 

"I'm taking these. Stop ruining your lungs!" you grabbed the easiest thing to get just to cover up the fact that your face was actually heating up and turning red, it was his box of cigarettes. 

And then you left Jeno with his cigarettes in hand, exactly 60 minutes and 21 seconds before your supposed exam. 

Running late you say?

--- 

There was no point in shushing Haechan. He was unapologetically noisy. Sometimes you'd think it's his sole purpose in life. 

"I call dibs on shotgun!" He exclaimed and then proceeded to chant "Shotgun. Shotgun. Shotgun. Shotgun." 

"Designated driver gets to decide who's shotgun. Right, Jeno? I'll pay for your food tonight, my friend." Renjun puts an arm around Jeno's shoulders.  

Next thing you knew, you were sandwiched between Renjun and Haechan who were endlessly bickering. Jaemin was right next to the car door, remaining unbothered. And the shotgun seat? Taken by a black haired Mark. 

Just how is his hair still growing? 

Anyway, Mark was the one who knew the location, earning him the spot. 

"But I have waze!" Haechan reasoned, but you all knew nothing's changing Jeno Lee's mind. 

In all honesty, you were kind of... bummed? You liked shotgun. Jeno knew that. As he's not a heavy drinker, he always presents himself as the designated driver. And you yourself do not like getting wasted so much, you'd blackout. So whenever you guys went home after clubbing, you were always at the right hand. Well, it's not like he's got a choice when everyone except you was drunk dead. 

But you deemed it not big of a deal. 

After all, you've been trying to limit your interactions with Jeno. 

You wonder if he notices it though?

As expected, Haechan was the life of the party. He's basically friends with everyone. Even the super seniors Johnny and Yuta are friends with him. Those three clashing would make one hell of a night. 

Tonight's party was at Taeyong Lee's house. Only Mark knows the location because he's been there one too many times. Taeyong helps him out with things you couldn't understand... anyway! Johnny is here too. You're already sure tonight's gonna be a blast. 

And you're not shotgun (though that depends). 

You can get wild! 

---- 

At 2 AM, your vision was spinning. 

Drunkenness and sleep was getting you. And it was your interaction with Jaemin that got Jeno standing from his seat. 

You and Jaemin were talking... with indistinct noises. In Jeno's ears, it was like the Sims talking. It got weirder when Hendery from another college joined the conversation. Suddenly, the three of you were like speaking your own foreign language! 

"Oh! It's Jenolee!" You exclaimed, pointing at his face when he went to where you were. 

"Jenononono we don't talk about Jenoooo!" Jaemin was singin in the tune of that one Disney song. 

"Riiight, I think we should go," Jeno calmly said to the both of you and Jaemin who are basically under his supervision. But the latter turns around and clings on a junior he knows. 

"Jisungieee, my Jisungieee~" 

and that's one less responsibility for Jeno, he thinks. Jisung is Jaemin's younger cousin and they are quite close. And whenever Jaemin clings to him drunk, that's gonna last for the rest of the night. 

"Okay... you, woman. We gotta go." He talked to you like you were still on the right mind. Well sike, you're not! 

Because if you were, you wouldn't be clinging onto Jeno like a hungry koala. 

And in Jeno's mind, he was thanking the heavens he didn't skip any gym day. He carried you like a rice sack, but you weren't actually heavy. It's just that you were trying to— 

"We gotta go. She's out," He told Renjun when he met him out on the lawn. Mark and Haechan were there as well, they were playing some game with Johnny and the others. Jeno just hit three birds with one, much to his relief. 

"Go bring her home, we can manage!" Haechan was the one to answer, he seemed like he was still enjoying himself. 

Jeno looks at Renjun and Mark who were also still laughing from whatever they were doing, they just nodded at him before redirecting their attention to their game.

So Jeno leaves 14 minutes past two. With a sober mind, and a completely drunk girl. 

---

You woke up with your body blanketed by a musky black leather jacket, in a parked car, seatbelt still on. The window on your side was open. 

And the guy outside the car, seated on the side of the hood, was Jeno. A cigarette between his lips as usual, and the cold air brushing his hair away from his eyes. 

At some point, you just wanted to stay there and stare as he blew out white smoke. But you shouldn't, you knew you shouldn't. 

Yet you still did. 

Just 45 seconds. 45 seconds will do. 

In the 43rd second, Jeno tilts his head and looks at you. Dammit. 

Panic flowed through your veins, pushing blood up to your face. So you yawn in an exaggerated way, covering your face in the process, and Jeno laughs. 

"You're awake, your grace." He throws away the cig and crushes it with his vans. 

You chuckled at his greeting and leaned on the window sill, your chin over your arms. "Indeed, my lord. Although I feel like I am still dreaming. Are you sure you aren't an angel?" You imitated an English accent to play the part. 

You've been obsessed with this certain series on Netflix nowadays and have been doing short skits with your other friends using the accent. You are actually surprised to hear Jeno doing it. They didn't find your English accent amusing, Haechan said. 

Maybe that was only Haechan's opinion. 

Jeno chuckles and shakes his head and you laugh. He just can't take a compliment. 

"Where are the others?" You asked. The backseat was empty and you were seated at the shotgun. The last thing you remember was you taking a swig of a drink concocted by Mark. It was... it should explain how you ended up here. 

You think you should really stop taking drinks made by Mark... like, seriously.

Because every time you do, the world around you spins like a ferris wheel. 

"They said they could handle themselves, and that I should take you home," he says. 

"but we're not home..." 

"Last time we brought you home wasted, you got grounded for a week... your grace," he snickered. "And besides, you told me you didn't want to go home yet." 

"I did?" And he nodded. "Okay... but did I... say anything more...?" 

"You did." He answered. 

You waited for him to continue talking but he just put the stick in between his lips, leaving it unlit. 

"...and?" You raised a brow. You were expecting he'd tell you what you apparently said before you went out. 

Jeno just shrugged. 

"Huh?" You tapped the car door from the outside. "Hey. Mister. Why aren't you talking?" 

And still, he just shrugged. So you threw his leather jacket at him but he caught it while laughing. 

"I'm kidding! You immediately fell asleep." The unlit cig was just stuck in between his teeth. 

Relief washed over you. You were worried you might've said something about trying to avoid him just because... 

"Why aren't you lighting that?" You gestured to the cig between his teeth. 

"I just... don't want to." 

The silence between you highlighted the birds chirping and the soft blowing wind. The skies were slowly turning bright with the first few moments of sunrise. 

"Jeno Lee..." You let his name roll out from your tongue like the first time. And he looked at you just like then. 

"Y/N," he imitated the way you spoke. 

The two of you just looked at each other with the intent of testing who will laugh first. 

Or maybe that's what he thought. 

You were just staring at him as the emerging sun illuminates the side of his face. You would've taken a photo if your phone wasn't dead. 

As cliché as it was, you could look at his face forever. 

So you chose to look away. 

"Let's go home, my mother's gonna kill me." 

"Yeah.." Jeno squints. Because of the sunlight or not? You aren't sure. "Let's get you home."

You've figured that the best course of action in dealing with this fiasco inside your head (or maybe your heart) is to avoid Jeno Lee at all cost. Of course, your almost identical vacancy schedule with him wasn't of any help, but who cares if you just lie your way out of it? 

So for the remaining days before summer break, you've given a ton of excuses just to not see Jeno. The worst part? You weren't sure why you were doing this. 

It's just that... something shifted that day. Beneath the blossom tree, right in Jeno's eyes. 

And then the sunrise. 

And the leather jacket. 

And the drive home. 

I should know better than this, you thought. I've been through this. 

You've liked people in the past, loved even. 

The big jar of paper cranes in your room was proof of this, and it's been 2 months since you stopped. Certain you were done with the boy. 

You are sure you are completely over the guy, but how did you know you loved him then? 

How did you— 

"Y/N." A voice cuts through your thoughts. 

Familiar. 

"Jaehyun," Ah. "I didn't see you there..." 

It's been exactly 6 months 13 days and... you lost track of the time from when you last saw him. 

You were just walking out the campus, making your way to a café nearby to study (and to avoid places you and Jeno always went to). And here you were, face to face once again with somebody you used to know so well. 

Jung Jaehyun. 

Ironic how you were just thinking about how you're moved on, and then... life. 

"How have you been?" He initiates the conversation. 

"Good." 

... 

Awkward. 

"Uh.. I was.. about to get coffee, wanna come?" You asked out of politeness. 

Jung Jaehyun looked at you like he was shocked you even offered. He'd probably decline anyway. 

"I mean, if you don't want to—" 

"I guess coffee won't hurt." Oh. 

And then the next thing was you seated in front of your ex, awkwardly sipping coffee. Like it happened for the first time. 

"You look good," you started. It was sincere, he actually looked fine. He had his hair parted in a different way, and his built has improved in comparison to before. 

He looked well. You hoped you were the same in his eyes, afterall you believe yourself well and happy now. 

"You too, y/n," he answered. 

In your mind was a series of memories of you and Jaehyun, spending two springs in each other's company. How you felt happy and content. 

And how the both of you slowly broke each other into millions of tiny pieces. 

You were the one who broke up with him. It happened when you had a lot of love to give while he had a space too little to fill. Incompatible, you were. 

So you decided to cut the thread. It was for the best. Because you knew that if you stayed any longer, it would take everything for you to heal. 

"Y/N..." he called and you looked him in the eye. "This might be a little too late but.." He licked his lips. A mannerism whenever he's nervous. "You know I loved you right?" 

It was like a punch in the gut, sucking out all the air in your lungs. Even your voice was gone and your tongue dry. 

"I just thought I didn't tell you enough." He'd look at anything except your eyes. "I loved you." 

"Jaehyun..." 

"And I'm sorry. I could've done so much more, I—" 

"Jaehyun, stop." You've finally found your voice and he finally looked you in the eye. All you saw was pain and somehow, it felt like torture. 

But you're done loving this man. Saying that in your head suddenly puts you at ease. 

"You know how I felt about you, Jae.." You lightly held his hand that was on top of the table and gave him a small yet genuine smile. "It hurt. But all is done, and I'm okay now." 

His eyes showed different hues of brown as the ray of setting sun hit them. There's no denying the beauty in them, but all you had in mind were those brown contact lenses and a mole near the eye. 

A smile formed on your lips at that thought but you tried to suppress it. 

"In fact, I'm very... content." You gave his hand a light squeeze. "We're good, Jae." 

Soon, the black leather jacket and the cigarette between one's lips flooded your mind. This time, the smile was unconcealable. 

"..We're good." 

One last squeeze 

and then you let go of Jung Jaehyun's hand. 

--- 

Certainty hit you like a truck. 

You liked Jeno Lee. You just realized that you've been liking him for quite a while yet this made you more determined to avoid the guy. 

In the short time of two months where you hung out with Jeno, you've formed a bond that you didn't want to break nor to risk breaking. He is your friends' friend who also became your close friend in the long run. If you took the risk and tried it out, will you be able to handle the consequences? 

The answer was so simple yet so complicated. So, your personal mission to avoid Jeno Lee continued. 

But apparently, you've miscalculated things because in front of your door was Renjun and Haechan, both looking like parents who are ready for severe scolding. 

"You little liar..." 

"Sneaky little bitch..." 

They both had their eyes narrowed at you despite the fact that you didn't know what you did. The last time you saw these two was when they hung out with you the day after the last party. The three of you nursing hangovers, lounging around your room. 

"Huh?" You were confused as to what these two were up to. Haechan began to tap his foot, crossed arms. And Renjun began shaking his head like he was so disappointed. 

"You know I'd rather you tell me what I did than this cryptic head-shaking and foot-tapping." 

"You know what you di—" 

"So you're back with that guy now?" Haechan cuts Renjun's speech. The latter hits him hard on the chest. 

"Ouch!" 

"What are you talking about?" Who's back with who? 

"A little birdy told us you were spotted with Jung Jaehyun in a café near campus." Renjun walked into your house while talking, and then Haechan followed in so you got to close the door. 

This information made you raise a brow. 

"And holding hands?? What's the point of me throwing out your love letters back then?" Haechan added, casually lounging on your parents' couch. 

They continued rambling about how you used to cry for Jaehyun and that they didn't want that to happen again. They were loud, too loud. And you had to defend yourself, because after all, it wasn't the truth. 

"Okay stop." You spoke with a firm voice and that made them look at you. 

"First of all, I'm not back with the guy." A pause. "We're done and we're good. I merely offered him coffee and he accepted." You defended. 

But the two rascals were just looking at you sketchily. So you continued. Telling in full detail what really happened, that he told you he loved you. Why you held his hand. What happened after. And that it was your full and final closure. 

"So... you aren't back with him?" Haechan asked once again and it made you groan out of frustration. 

"Ugh no! I'm not that much of a fool!" 

"Oh poor little birdy..." You heard Renjun whisper. 

"Who's that little birdy of yours anyway?" You asked in an irritated tone. 

"Lee Jeno." Haechan—who apparently found his way to the kitchen, eating your leftover chips—casually said. 

The name took five full seconds to register in your brain. Lee Jeno. 

Jeno Lee. 

Oh gods.

Remember when you used to avoid all the places you went to with Jeno? Well now you're doing the exact opposite of that. You even searched through all of the smoking areas around campus, hoping you'll spot him right there having his daily dose of nicotine. 

But Jeno Lee was nowhere to be found. 

You've asked Jaemin and Mark... Haechan and Renjun.. even that guy in his physics class that he'd mentioned to you once. All their answers varied everyday so you didn't know where to start. 

Jaemin says he's probably in the gym. So you went there, but apparently he was done with his session. Mark didn't have any idea on his whereabouts. Haech and Renjun both just asked you why and teased you non-stop (it didn't help at all!). 

Now it's been forty-seven days since you last saw even a smoke out of Jeno Lee's lips. And slowly, you've been filling up a small jar with paper stars. It eventually became a calming activity for you. 

You still haven't stopped looking for Jeno. Everyday was a different place of where he could be. You figured he'll eventually pop up like he used to. 

Today you returned to the picnic table under the shade of the blossom tree. 

While walking towards it, you noticed that it was occupied. A black piece of clothing on the table, and a man in white shirt and tattered jeans... and blonde hair? 

Is this finally him? 

"Jeno?" You called and he easily confirmed by turning his head to face you. 

You never thought you'd go slack jawed for a man but this... this was an exemption. 

He had his hair up and styled. His physique was exceptional as before. A cig slowly burning between his lips. But his face, it wasn't the same as the ones that greeted you every vacant time. It was stoic. A hundred thousand times different from his famous smiling eyes. 

"Hey." He spoke. 

"Hey.." 

You walked closer, scared that taking a step nearer would chase him away. You silently prayed to the gods for him to stay. 

But guess your prayers didn't reach the heavens. 

Throwing the cig away, he gathered the other things he had on the table and wore his leather jacket, preparing to leave. 

You weren't letting this chance go. 

"Jeno, stop." But he didn't. "Please." This time you pleaded, trying to convince yourself you weren't gonna cry. 

"You're avoiding me." You added. 

He scoffed before turning to you. "Well what can I say? I learned from the best." His words reeked sarcasm but you still saw through the pain in his eyes. You knew damn well he was talking about you. 

"I'm sorry. Let's talk. Please?" Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. 

"I don't want any misunderstanding, y/n. Please." He sounded defeated. "Just... be happy." Then he turns away. 

"It's not wha—" You tried to explain but the distance between you and him took your voice away. 

It's not what you think, Jeno.. 

-- 

Day 71 from when you first realized your feelings for Jeno. Exactly twenty-four days since he turned his back on you underneath the blossom tree. 

You have filled two small jars with small paper stars to the brim and have started filling up the third. 

Everything's back to normal. And by normal, it meant the time before you found Jeno behind the club hiding his vice. 

For consolation, Jeno never avoided you again. He was always there, present during night outs, still the designated driver, still the one who remains sober. You thought that after your last encounter, he'd never want to see you again but here he is. Always in your presence without acknowledging you. 

You felt that it was better if he had avoided you completely rather than seeing him everyday, laughing at Haechan's jokes but never meeting your eyes. 

But then again, you like Jeno Lee. Seeing him physically is a hundred times better than just thinking about him 24/7 (while in fact you do that as well). Also, why did he have to be so hot in his blonde hair?! Your honor, this is torture. 

He'd talk to you... at times. Mostly about passing food. Or a drink... It was very civil. Like you and him did not have a shared short lifetime of nicotine and quizzes.

Day 79, you passed by him in the hallway. You waved hi, he gave you a smile, then walked away. 

Day 86. Vacant time before a major exam, you were reviewing on the picnic table under the blossom tree. You weren't gonna lie, you were expecting him to be there to help you. But what is to expect if there were no unwritten promises? 

By the 91st day, your third jar has been filled halfway. 

Haechan had already scolded you for using too much paper. Renjun, on the other hand, knows what the meaning of this habit of yours is. 

"That's what you call self soothing, Donghyuck. You don't know that because you always had your mommy to soothe you." 

"Hey you can't use mama's boy card on me when in fact my mom likes you more than me!" 

"Damn right she does! I'm like the most perfectest son she could have!" 

Haechan scoffs and mumbles "most" and "perfectest" under his breath. You laughed at the use of words as well. 

The two rascals are in your bedroom again, saying they are your pretty little angels who will apparently comfort you after you barely passed that one major exam. 

Guess their bantering became your comfort afterall. 

"Don't you two have anything better to do?" You asked in the middle of your star folding. 

Renjun crossed his arms. "Actually, we're supposed to be at a party right now. But you should ask Haechan why..." he had his eyes squinted at the latter. And Haechan was avoiding eye contact, playing with the stars you have already folded. 

You squint your eyes as well. "What is it, Haech?" 

"Yeah, Donghyuck, tell her why we won't go to Kun ge's house party..." Renjun added, emphasizing Haechan's real name like it had something to do with it. 

"Kun? Like... that cute senior? You were invited and you're not coming??" 

"I kissed his brother okay? I have to save face!" Your jaw dropped at his confession. 

"The guy from lit?" You asked. 

"The guy from lit!" Renjun exclaimed. 

You dramatically threw your half folded origami and stood up with conviction. Going straight to your closet, you grabbed a party dress. 

"What are you doing?" Haechan's voice was filled with fear and Renjun was laughing so loud, even holding his stomach. 

There are so many things you live for. Embarrassing any of your two friends was one of them. 

"We're going to the party!" 

Pre-game at Renjun's before driving to the party, surely there's only one of you who isn't very willing to come. But Haechan had no choice, he'd be missing out on a night of his life if he didn't. When you arrived, the party was at its peak. People were drunk, bodies clung to one another... you even saw Kun taking out what looks like another bottle of Cuervo. It would've been fun to get sloshed but you presented to be the designated driver of the night since you are the plus one. 

"I'm gonna get drinks!" Renjun half yelled over the loud music before leaving your side. 

"And I'm gonna puke!" Haechan pulled away from you but you didn't let him go. You know he's just gonna escape from you. 

"Not on my watch!" You laughed and searched through the area where Kun's brother could be. And just at the right moment, you spotted him near the fireplace. They were playing what seemed like a game of spin the bottle because they were in a messy circle. 

"There he is." You mumbled proudly, much to Haechan's chagrin. 

You pulled Haechan towards the group. Some of the players were already leaving (possibly to party more outside), so you took their seats. Not realizing that there was a still-blond-Jeno Lee right in front of the seat you've just taken. And when your gazes aligned, his was already leaving yours. 

So you did the same and just pulled Haechan down to sit beside you. 

Apparently they were playing truth or dare. Just a moment ago, Jisung (who you just noticed) actually dared to drink two small shots of what seemed to be vinegar. 

As the night progressed, the wilder each dare became. Two players were already dared to do body shots, others had to do lap dances. Jeno had to be on the receiving end (which really pissed you off, by the way). Haechan, on your side, was shaking his foot. 

"Next dare!" Chenle started picking out a piece of paper from a fish bowl. "Liplocking for five seconds!" And the crowd roared. Because knowing these people, five seconds will probably turn to ten. Fifteen even. 

"I'm gonna pass out." Haechan whispers in your ear when the tip of the bottle pointed to him. On the other end of the bottle was Kun's brother. The lit 101 guy. You didn't know the name. 

"You've been blessed by the gods!" A cheer from you got the other people cheering as well. Ten seconds of simple kissing would be hot, but ten seconds of Haechan french kissing his big fat crush would be hella spicy! 

"You aren't safe, I'm telling you!" Lit 101 guy was already crawling towards Haechan since he was in fact sitting on the floor like the rest of you. Undoubtedly he ain't sober anymore, a good explanation as to why he's unashamed in doing the dare. 

Haechan had a tight grip on your arm while the other guy's face was already close to him. It was a frontrow seat of them doing edges and you weren't gonna lie, you're loving it. 

Not until you caught a glimpse of Jeno's eyes on your lips. And then on your eyes. And then back at your lips again. 

Suddenly the two people in front of you were already locking lips, yet your mind was wondering how that felt... with Jeno in mind. 

Heachan loosened his grip on your arm and it started caressing the cheeks of the other. They stopped kissing and for a hot second they whispered into each other's ears. The next thing you know, the seat beside you is vacated and then replaced by another player. People around you cheered, yet your mind was too occupied by the blonde guy in front. 

Your mission here is done. You tried to convince yourself. You should go. 

And go, you did. You excused yourself from the game, your seat immediately taken by another. Your friend is about to have the night of his life, meanwhile, the other is nowhere to be found. You had drunk a few shots from the game and you're in between tipsy and downright drunk, your friends are gonna need to find another ride home. You've fully accepted that you are indeed lightweight. But that's more fun right? 

No. 

Because why did you have to be so weak when tipsy? If it wasn't the case, a guy wouldn't be holding your wrist right now. 

"Where are you going?" Worry evident in his voice. But you wouldn't figure that out. 

"Away from your presence, my lord." You let out small drunken giggles. It was the first time again that you've used this way of speaking. 

"You're drunk." 

"And you're not?" 

"Let's get you home." 

"It isn't even past two!" 

"Come on..." 

You broke away from his grip and proceeded walking somewhere away from Jeno. But somehow he surpassed you and blocked your way. You tried to get away through the opposite but he somehow blocked it too. Now you're cornered on the wall and your mind just realized that you're in a quiet hallway upstairs. Alone together. 

"Jeno, stop." 

"Stop what?" 

"You can't do this. Stop doing this." 

"What can't I do?" He went closer. "Tell me, y/n.." and closer. "What am I not permitted to do?" 

His eyes were on yours. Burning intensely. Piercing through your skin; like gravity pulling you in. The alcohol in your system seemed to be already flushed out by the browns and blacks of his eyes and by the pinks and reds of his lips. This is torture, your honor. 

You looked away. And then threw a punch on his chest. Then another. And another, and another, and another. And he was just letting you do so. 

"You cannot avoid me like that and then return like nothing happened at all!" a punch. 

"You cannot leave me like that! Like I meant nothing— like we meant nothing!" Another. 

"You just had to listen! But you chose not to, Jeno Lee! You chose to walk away—" a kiss. 

Jeno Lee's lips were suddenly on yours. Soft. Gentle. It was...new. A movement was all it took for you to know it was true. 

It was happening. Jeno fucking Lee is kissing you as if he didn't tell you to be happy with another guy. You responded back, lips moving against another. His arm snaked around your waist and pulled you closer to him. Your body molded into his, arched towards his stomach. Your hands found their way to his hair and raked through it, feeling how soft it was even though you figured it went through a cruel bleaching process. And in between your kisses, you heard him groan. 

You heard and felt his groan and it sent shivers down your spine. If he wasn't holding your waist, you probably were on your knees. In just a moment of weakness, his tongue found its way in. 

You felt like floating. You've had a lot of good hookups, but no one ever kissed you the way this boy did. You never want to stop. You just want to have his lips on yours forever. 

But you had to break away to breathe. 

The both of you panted to catch your breaths. His forehead was on yours and his gaze still on your lips. 

You couldn't explain but he looked...confused and angry and desperate all at the same time. 

"Fuck..." He whispered, still catching his breath. 

"Why..." you started, trying to catch your own breath. "...why'd you do that?" 

He turned his head away from you, his arms still caging you in. Until he let them down, whispering more curses under his breath. 

"Jeno—" 

He walked away too fast but you were suddenly in the right mind to catch up. He headed towards the garden while you were just behind him, people were bumping into you so you had to double time when the amount of drunk humans subsided. 

"Lee Jeno, stop walking away from me!" 

Yet he didn't stop, even getting in his car. But you were fast enough to enter the passenger's seat. 

"You're not getting away this time." You said while buckling the seatbelt. He was just looking at you, confusion and anger(?) in his eyes. 

"You brought your own car." He pointed out. 

"I'm too drunk to drive. Now why did you kiss me?" 

"I'm too drunk to answer your question." He revved the engine. 

"And yet you're starting your car!" 

"I can drive." 

"Then you can answer my question too." 

Yet you received no more answers. 

Jeno just buckled his own seat belt then started driving. Around the block, and then the village gates. Silence ensued between the two of you, no one dared to talk with the height of emotions the both of you had. 

He stopped the car near a gasoline station's convenience store, went out of the car and into the store, leaving you still holding on to the buckled seat belt as if he will try to drop you off anytime soon. 

He returned with two cans of warm coffee on hand. 

"What..." 

"You want us to talk right?"  

"Well yeah—" 

"I'm not doing that while we're not completely sober." He flicked the can open then gave it to you. Doing the same for his can. 

You hesitated to drink but you figured that it wasn't so you to be doing serious talks with an alcohol cloudy mind. 

So in a parked car at a gasoline station, two people were sitting in silence. Sipping their coffee, waiting to be sober enough to discuss actualities and emotional dilemmas. 

"Are you not going to smoke?" You asked, wondering why he hasn't taken out a stick like he always did when he was with you. 

"Besides the fact that we're in a gasoline station, I'm actually trying to stop smoking..." 

"And why is that?" Looking back, you realized that the last time you saw a glimpse of smoke out of his mouth was when you finally found him after days of searching. 

"Someone said... I should stop ruining my lungs." You turned to him and saw the usual glow of his eyes. It was the eyes that you used to know, you're glad to see them again. 

"Well..." You swallowed. "That someone influenced you well then." Jealousy drips down the tone of your voice. You had told him more than once to quit the vice yet he continued to do so. This someone probably holds a special place in his life for him to follow so easily. It made you question, had you ever held a place in his life? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe you had a small stool reserved in his life full of grand dining chairs. 

"Yeah.." 

"And your hair?" 

"Mark did it. It sucks I know..." He chuckled while ruffling his hair. 

"No, it looks nice! Like really nice." It's so nice that every girl turns their heads when you're around and I'm annoyed every freaking time. 

"It does?" He looked at you in wonder if you were really telling the truth. Instead of answering, you were caught in a trance with how he looked so...so... 

Deja vu. 

Your mind suddenly showed you an unfamiliar memory of you in this exact same car with your hands cradling the face of a black-haired Jeno. 

"What are you doing, miss drunken gir—" 

"Holy shit!" You blurted out. 

"What, what happened?" Jeno also panicked. 

"Did I... did I ever kiss you before?" 

Jeno blinked. 

You blinked. 

Once, twice, thrice... 

"Tell me... what did I do that night? After Lee Taeyong's party?" 

You saw his adam's apple bob up and down, his jaw clenched as well and he looked away from you. 

"So... you just remembered." 

"Tell me what I did!" You demanded while hitting his arms in the process. 

"Okay, okay..." He grabbed your hands that were still hitting him and held onto them to stop you from further physical (but light) abuse. 

"That night, you were so drunk that you kept clinging onto my neck. And you... you..." 

"What?" 

"Let's just say that you tried leaving marks." He scratched his nape in embarrassment. "So I had to carry you like a sack. And I couldn't bring you home because I wouldn't want to be the reason you are grounded. So I brought you somewhere you could get sober. You were sleeping, I was sure of it. But suddenly you were awake and... kissed me and things were escalating quickly and then boom... in dreamland you went." 

"I fell asleep while making out with you?!" 

"Kind...of?" 

"What the fuck is wrong with me, seriously?" 

The self loathing was so present in the moment. How could you ever fall asleep while kissing a Jeno Lee! 

"You also said something that time..." 

You looked at him and he was still avoiding your eyes like it was him who did something embarrassing. 

[From here on out, all italicized words will be Jeno's side of the story starting from Taeyong's party]

"I think.... I think..." A hiccup escaped your lips. "I think I like you."  

Jeno looked at you to see if you were awake again but you had your eyes closed already. Was it a dream of yours? Do you think the kiss was just a dream? Were you aware that you were saying these things to him? 

They say drunk words are sober thoughts. Jeno used to believe that. But right now, your drunk words were too much of a fantasy for him. How could you say that so easily when he himself couldn't find the courage to do so for months? 

When you woke up (once again) that day, fully sober. He had expected you wouldn't remember anything in an instant. So he decided to leave the drama for tomorrow. You and him had all the time in the world to talk about it so why rush? 

He brought you home, came back to Taeyong's house to fetch the others, went home himself, and rested. He had to gather up all of his strength to face you the next day. For sure at that time, you already remember. 

But on the next day, you weren't there at the picnic table under the blossom tree. He tried asking your other friends, they all said you were busy. He tried again on the next day but it was still the same. 

Days passed. Weeks. He couldn't get a hold of you. His calls to you were always declined. If not declined, it reached voicemail. His texts left with no replies. His chats left unread. 

Were you avoiding him? But why? 

He assumingly answered the 'why' when he saw you in that cafe with the guy you told him stories about. 'Jaehyun' was it? Of course, you weren't the type to ghost a friend. You always had a valid reason for everything. 

Jeno then decides to spend the days trying to forget that night. Suppressing his own feelings by lifting weights and avoiding even a bit of your shadow. 

He heard from people that you were looking for him and for a moment, he almost succumbed to the thought of it. But he believed he shouldn't see you. Not when you were probably back with the guy you used to like and he was there with existing nicotine-originated feelings for you. 

He chose to be kind to himself. Because that's what he should do right? 

Not until one day when he chose to relive his moments with you and you found him. 

Why...why did you look so sad? 

He knew he had to go right away. He couldn't promise he could keep his arms to himself. 

And go he did. 

And later on realizing that it was a dumb decision because seeing your eyes again brought life into his system. Like they were the fuel to his fire. 

Jeno decided he won't avoid you the way he did ever again. No scratch that— Jeno knows he couldn't avoid you ever again after seeing you like that. He had to make sure you were always okay. But he didn't know how to approach you. 

So he just became present everywhere you went. Like he used to be. Except he was just there and you were out of his reach and the nicotine withdrawal has been very tough that he wanted to tell you about it but he just...can't. 

The next thing he knew, he was kissing you in a silent hallway. His arms snaked around your waist while your hands raked through his hair. It was like the first time, except this was better. So much better. 

But the taste of the mixed vodka from your lips brought him back to his cloudy senses. 

You were drunk. Not 'drunk' drunk like before but you weren't sober. And he has seen this all before, he didn't like what happened next. 

Besides, you didn't deserve intimacy initiated by alcohol and lack of nicotine. 

So, he tried to run away like every dumb and coward person would do. 

Because why would he tell you 

"I like you. And you deserve to know that... at least while I'm in the right state of mind." Jeno finally confessed. 

You were once again slack-jawed from everything he told you. 

"But if you actually did get back with him.. then just brush it off. It's okay, I promise." He finally looked into your eyes like he was trying to prove that he would be okay. Like he hadn't just told you how your stupid decisions in life caused yourself unnecessary torture. 

And what? He still thinks you're back with Jeong Jaehyun? 

With no thoughts, head empty, you unbuckle your seatbelt and reach for his face and kiss his lips. 

It was the sweetest, the realest, and the softest kiss you ever had. 

And literally, it's your first time kissing him with a sober mind. 

At exactly 3 months, 2 days, and 3 hours from the day you first realized that you liked this boy, you finally get to stop folding those paper stars. 

No more silly games of hide and seek. No more dumb decisions. 

The taste of coffee lingered on your lips when you pulled away and it made you laugh. 

"Funny, we both taste like coffee.." You bit your lip to suppress a smile. 

"Then maybe caffeine will be my new addiction." He said before pulling you in once again, savoring your lips. 

This time with no more inhibitions.

[scoonsalicious]

the first thing i really want to say, i hate being right. i really hate it this time. WE WERE ROOTING FOR YOU BUCKY. I !!! WAS !!! FUCKING !!! ROOTING !!! FOR !!! YOU !!! I'll be calling you other names now until further notice. honestly, what more can I say? I basically said all the thoughts I had on my previous ask, and while at first they were based on theories, well, now they're not 😭 I'm not even mad at him anymore, I'm just so drained and tired of it all. Disappointed really. Just disappointed. I do know he didn't do the "<3" tho. Since Jethro went through his phone so she probably changed it herself. But that's the least of everyone's problem right now.

Like I said, if he had just confessed right off the bat, it wouldn't have been as bad, in my opinion at least. I mean, it's still a shitty thing to do no matter the semantics or technically, but it's the LYING. It's truly what fucks a person up. And yes with what you said!!! Brendon took so many choices away from Pocket!!! She was blindsided and manipulated to some degree and it's just. sigh. so disappointed.

Now, let me put my theory cap on because lol surprise, I have some. You said the first time didn't count. So something must've happened and I know you said it wasn't SA but sex pollen? could be? Or omg, something Hydra put because you know how they would probably want super soldiers to procreate even if it's against their will? What if Jacinta knows that code? and ..... shit, omg. wait. I just realized something. I really had to stare at my screen because this could be mind blowing but I also could be so wrong because this probably won't make any sense. BUT, (i know this will seem like i'm defending him but hear me out) if the first time wasn't his choice (not fully anyway), he probably still felt disgusted by himself that it happened. So, the second time, do you think Bob did it to punish himself? Like doing the act didn't give him any pleasure at all, just disgust and guilt and regret and actual physical pain? !!! TW !!! but kinda self-harm but in a different way? Because maybe in the back of his mind, he knew this would destroy Pocket, and the thought of that itself is so painful to him that, he did it as a way to punish himself? To hurt himself by hurting pocket? Which is a really fucked up mental gymnastic but idk okay, i have no idea how my brain works LMAO. He needs a new therapist my god. Or maybe he needs two. Or maybe I'm just way over my head and the reason the second time happened was because that was the time he saw the articles. OR could be both a mixture of both. And again, he had an actually devil in his shoulder. But still, to given in that easily. Weakass supersoldier if you ask me. Like I said, the whole "I did it for revenge" cuts differently too. Honestly just basically what i said on my previous ask hahaha

Sigh, I know there's something else going on. I know something was cooking underneath all that. I'm sure Jenny had more at play to this than Baker. I don't think she's that lucky that the universe just decided for everything to fall into place like that. I'm sure she had all the string. Like yes, I won't deny Bryan is an asshole, and he still did what he did. But still, no matter if there was something that happened that led up to the act (apart from the articles which is shitty on its own as a reason but he's a fragile weakass man so) It still won't change how he lied about it after. I do think the heaviest part of it, especially to Pocket, wasn't exactly the fact that he slept with Junia but the fact that he lied about it and covered it up.

I will add tho, as much as I am looking forward for Pocket to have her villain origin story, because she absolutely does deserve it, I'm just hoping she won't do something that she's regret later on. Though right now, I also have no idea how she's ever going to forgive him. We'll just have to wait and see as everything unfolds.

Honestly, I don't think I've got anything more to add. I'm just sitting here sighing and shaking my head as I'm typing this. Though I can't wait for the truth to unravel, because I really do have a feeling there's more than meets the eye. I'll probably pop back in if I have a new theory, but either way. You're amazing as always!

— Jnon 🤍

I think getting your posts are the favorite part of my day!

Let's address! I'm sorry you were right. I hate that you were right, but right you were. Pocket is also definitely drained and tired from it, too. Exhausted. Brutus definitely did not do the <3; he didn't even know how to unblock her. Venus Flytrap (going with a V-name this time, lol) did it all herself.

Part of what hurts Pocket so much is that Buckwheat knows her history, knows how much trouble she has with trusting people, and yet, he keeps lying. It's one of those "I lied because I knew the truth would hurt you," but he doesn't realize that the truth is so much more easy for her to digest than having to constantly wonder if he's being honest with her, just to find out he's not. One of the things they bonded over, early on in their friendship, was that they had had their bodies used by others, without their consent, so she thought he understood how important that was for her, and to have him make the same decisions her abusers did, by taking away her ability for informed consent, that's what's killing her. She thought he knew her better than that. Your theories! The "first time" doesn't have anything to do with sex pollen or Hydra. You are definitely close in that he felt disgusted with himself, which has a lot to do why the first time doesn't count. You'll have to wait until Chapter 27 to find out! It really was a happy accident for Jaeger Bomb that the articles happened. She didn't pull any strings, but she absolutely used them to her advantage. If they hadn't come out, she would have most likely come up with some other diabolical plan to get what she wanted. Pocket's going to face some dark times coming up, definitely. There will be a lot of self-destructive behavior and spiraling, but she's not gonna go full-on Thanos or anything (who could blame her if she did, let's be honest). The only person she's really going to hurt, going forward, is herself :( As always, Jnon, it is a pleasure. Thank you so much for bringing such happiness to my days <3 I love you!

[floareadeaur]

I'm the anon who asked for hcs with ferid in intimate moments. I also think that such labels as 'vanilla' or bdsm don't fit him, I don't think that he would care about this stuff, and neither do I. But I couldn't find any better words to describe what I wanted to say. I also didn't want to write a long essay about it lol. I am curious about vampires' nature and how their emotions work.

First of all, I thought that you are a reliable person that can actually see Ferid for who he is. I also knew from the beginning, when I started reading the manga, that Ferid, and many other characters, aren't how the fandom perceives them as. It is sad how so many characters in such amazing mangas and animes get so misunderstood by the whole fandom. I knew that Ferid had many 'secrets' and that everything he shows to the world is simply a facade. I knew that he had hidden motives and he may be an antihero. I understood that he was actually a lonely and generous soul, besides all his masks that he puts on to hide this vulnerability of his. I don't want to write an essay about him, so I'll just say that I agree with everything that you write about him.

Second of all, because I realized that there's finally another person that can really understand these characters in OnS, I decided that it is best to ask for your opinion on this matter, since it confused me. I thought for a long time that all vampires are asexual, but I saw how many vampires in ons break the stereotypes of vampires in their universe. So I've been wondering for a while if Ferid can also feel lust. I like your writings and your perspective about him. I can also feel that you genuinely love Ferid, even if he's fictional, because of how much of your soul you put in these analyses and stories. I guess that the Seraph of the End fandom perceives Ferid like how so many other people in the ons universe view him as. That's why so many characters in OnS are driven to do something for their love for someone, but Ferid may be the only character who REALLY was unloved, alone and misunderstood his entire life. I sometimes wish that Kagami would add a love interest for Ferid that could understand and love him, even if the manga is not about romantic love, rather about familial love.

But it's worse when you're a ferid kinnie and the fandom also thinks that you kin him for being 'creepy' and a clown with daddy issues. LIKE WTF IS WRONG WITH THIS FANDOM?? I am part of many fandoms but this fandom is the worst one that I have ever been in. If I were Kagami and I saw how this fandom is, I would honestly kms. So much effort is put into these writings of Kagami, only to be misunderstood and fetishized by the whole fandom.

Hello!

Honestly, I did not expect to receive such a message. Usually, the feedback here is non-existent. I can say that it is one of the most beautiful surprises of my existence on tumblr. Thank you!

I prefer this type of communication, where people who read this blog talk openly and honestly with me, saying exactly what they think, what they like about what I write, or what they love about this series. Or, last but not least, what frustrates them about fandom.

Maybe it is because that is how I feel a real human interaction here, or maybe I just love discussing everything in depth!

Do not worry about using those terms. I have a very long opinion about the origin of "BDSM", or the way today's society influences such labels. All I can say is that, as you pointed out, I do not see Ferid falling into such "mechanical" labels.

I do not see many characters being into these labels, honestly. But I guess it is easier to classify characters under such categories in a black-and-white fashion.

To touch more on the topic you opened in the previous question, about what Ferid would be like intimately, I deeply emphasize his need to live truly, authentically and freely, as who he really is.

That is why I think he manifests very naturally and organically from an erotic perspective and just loves passionately, as it is said. Showing his real personality, being vulnerable. Love for him must be genuine.

Perhaps many do not notice this. But this character has extraordinarily sharp and objectively correct discernment.

For Ferid, good is good, bad is bad. His understanding of the world and values ​​is not distorted. That is precisely why he is so angry that his world, including his soul, is created from darkness, from a curse, a putrid origin. Because he realizes well what normality would be, something that does not exist in OnS. And he longs for this good and harmonious ideal.

That is why he is so frustrated and angry at those who should have given him genuine love: his parents, his older brother, Rígr. Remember how he tells Rígr, in their discussion in chapter 91, how he believes it is a father's duty to teach his son "the meaning of life". And beyond any irony, Ferid is right. It is the duty of the parents, the older brothers, the figures who have authority and responsibility over the little ones to genuinely love and care for them.

But Ferid was only objectified and used by all these people who played a fatal role in his existence, especially considering that he was a child, or at most a teenager when he interacted with them, meaning that he was an extremely impressionable being, an easily marked, vulnerable one.

And on the principle of his own universe, he tries to pay back all these people. Revenge is not something that makes him happy, given the ideal of a good universe that he would like, so he suffers.

But this tangibly demonstrates how Ferid knows what true love is, but has never met it. He tries to create it, going so far as to change the rotten origin of the universe that created his soul and holds him captive.

For me, this shows a special nobility of soul, a huge potential that Ferid has.

That is why I believe that if Ferid met genuine love, especially romantic, erotic love, he would give everything for it.

Of course, it is a situation he never encountered before, and he needs some time to get used to it.

That is why I described him in the previous answer as appearing "frozen" sometimes, stiff.

But if she truly loves him, Ferid opens up and resolutely offers a love of the same kind.

Ferid needs to be seen as human. A human person is not a label. How Ferid is not a label. A human person has a complexity of nuances, a paradox of experiences and feelings. Perhaps the hardest thing is seeing someone as human, not projecting your expectations onto them and just understanding that person.

In his love for his beloved woman, Ferid could be seen thus, humanly, in his complex reality with all the nuances. And he would see her that way too.

For the first time, he, who always truly reads people, would find something so harmonious in her being: the ability to be seen as himself through someone's eyes.

That is why I mentioned in several of my posts how Ferid would love to look into her eyes. Because her gaze would remind him of the sky, the place where he always looked for love and got no answer. But in that " sky " beyond her vivid, warm eyes, he now finds all he has sought all his life.

That is why I think that the way he would make love to her, how he would "be in bed" would be deeply derived from the way he loves her and how he feels loved by her.

I think it can be called "adoring" the way Ferid would make love to her. The way I portray every such scene with him in my mind is extremely organic, natural.

Their erotic intimacy would be a dive into the very lives of both.

It is precisely for this reason I see that Ferid has this tenderness and meticulous care for her. And at the same time that he leads her and is so dynamic.

Ferid simultaneously offers his sensitive fragility, his determined ability of leading to his woman. All in a lively, passionate form.

Thus I see that his every touch is so " consistent", " decided ".

It feels like a true dedication to her, how Ferid gives everything to their love, and I think this topic could be fleshed out more by me.

How the way Ferid touches his woman gives her safety and symbolizes how his true potential is given to a cause that makes Ferid truly happy. Why she loves him.

Why she loves Ferid Bathory, why she is melted in her intimacy with Ferid Bathory.

This subject is almost never touched upon in the writings of a fandom.

And that can lead us to what you were saying, why you love this character, why I love him.

I believe that the author of OnS has created vivid characters. Each character has a real human consistency. They are organically written, realistic for their contexts. That is why I think that each character can be admired, if we try to understand them as human beings in their universe.

I, at least, look at Kagami's works from a writer's point of view. I analyze literary, what were the intentions of the writer. Maybe that is why I also see these characters as living human entities in their fictional universe.

And I try to understand them like this. Before romanticizing, forming a romantic attachment, or a fantasy, I am focused on humanly understanding these characters and keeping their "living breath" further in what I write and analyze.

I think this is necessary in the understanding of some literary characters, especially when they are penciled in this way by the author.

Now, as I said, everyone understands everything as they can and as they want.

There was a time when I was so saddened by what you say, that the fandom does not understand any of the author's message. But I have realized that I had rather enjoy what I love than discuss what other people's opinions are.

Especially, Kagami said something that impressed me. He said how he never imagines "the voice of the fans" when he writes and that he is not interested in writing anything popular. He also said that he only writes from his heart, exactly what he feels and that he will always do only that, and how he strongly believes that if he does that, he will find his niche of readers.

There is a saying in my native language, "what comes from the heart touches the heart" and I think it is very appropriate for Kagami and OnS.

The author writes from the heart and his writings touch some hearts, as he touched mine, or yours.

This is nice and motivating enough for me so I can just enjoy this series that I love and ignore any unpleasant opinions of some strangers online.

At the end of the day, fandom does not define a series. As I said before, the canon material does not change. It is always there for those who want to read it, reread it, analyze it.

Thank you for answering me. It really means a lot. And yes, I can say "I love" Ferid, even if he is fictional. I love the humanity of the character and the way I can feel him "alive" in his universe. The way I can even discover myself, understanding him, and growing as a person, developing my soul and mind. This is what I do with Ferid, with this series, and I consider that the author has achieved his purpose as a writer with me!

In the end, you are right. It is ironic and sad how many in the fandom see Ferid just like most in his universe, but maybe that is the charm of this deep character.

Do not forget, he is named " unparalleled ".

Everyone in OnS does anything for the ones they love. But Ferid wants to change the very putrid origin of the world, the laws of the universe that created people out of hatred, just to have harmony, a real meaning, authentic love.

This universe has been corrupted since its creation, humanity is cursed and trapped as in Hell, and Ferid wants to solve this vicious circle, to break it.

I think this shows the nobility of this character, that he really is "one of a kind". And even though I wish he had someone to truly love him, I understand and appreciate the author's intent. The hidden nobility in Ferid's tragedy is something truly beautiful to me.

I would go into more detail about how Ferid would love his woman, how he would make love to her. But I feel like my essay is getting too long.

Please write me any questions you have. Just like that, just like now. I will gladly answer.

I think we can have some fascinating discussions!

Thank you so much for this heartfelt message!

Have a nice day to you and whoever finds this post!

[miasiegert]

Day 2, and one workshop photo of MY work

Before I say ANYTHING, hello to Wichita folk from Chaz. :) He was shocked (and delighted) at how much people enjoyed the show and we absolutely are brainstorming things for the future. So a huge thank you for the support and kindness. It meant a ton to him (and obviously me and David as well!)

Day 2 was a roller coaster... for ME!

I'm very suspicious because everything is going so well. Too well. Things never go this well. So I decided it was time to start really stoning some costume pieces that I hadn't before while David got supplies.

Then I got a phone call, never a good sign, from David asking me could I get the padlock open for the gate.

Padlock? What Padlock?

There are no concrete answers, only a guess... but it's believed that people who share a lot to store their boats left and padlocked the gate behind them so I was TRAPPED in the costume shop (which is a completely different building/drive away from the theatre) all alone with no food and had been the entire day while David couldn't get me.

Some chaos to get a key and get out, and David decided to go to the night time run through for notes. Chaz told me to take tonight off because I went through ND hell as there was a loud beeping noise nonstop and I had to turn my headphones up louder than normal (I usually watch a show in the background--today was "Power Book III: Raising Kanan" from Starz) so it hurt then the panic of being alone and trapped.

Anyway, what I *Did* realize was that I absolutely can share a wip of Bedazzling more of the Reba!Suit because that is my costume, that has been seen onstage before, there is no actor in it, no full costume, and it's MY original design.

Way back, we had very cheap acrylic rhinestones because we were too poor for better ones. Now, we're mixing in preciosa and swarovski with some crystal and glass ones. We have not removed the acrylics YET because a lot is carefully plotted fill ins and until I have enough time to REALLY thoroughly do it, I don't want to remove any sparkle.

So, for your pleasure (or not, Idk, maybe you don't care) this is the epaulets and belt for the Gumbie Tap Suit that's my design. If you notice a few interesting things with the waistband/tail, that is because it's got four strong snaps for the waist. There's stretch but not as much as some of our other specialty fabric, and different tappers prefer different tightness. We're hoping to add some snaps as this Jenny is between sizes and really wants a snatched waist (she didn't want to take the costume off--never seen anyone so happy before!)

I will be adding gold, yellow, and orange to it. I added purple to Misto in two shades and some AB crystals.

I forgot if I said this or not but I was requested to rhinestone Misto's shoes for his song number. I can't wait to show people pictures. I'm pretty sure there will be video. The last time I saw a very flippity Misto was my first pro production where an INCREDIBLE cheerleader/gymnast/hiphop dancer was cast. It was incredible to watch. This choreo is really fun and Misto's actor's manner actually does come across as shy and aloof at first... then super excited and happy. METHOD ACTING OR JUST HYPED ABOUT COSTUMES??? The world may never know.

I think people will REALLY like Rumple and Mungo a LOT. Cassandra is FANTASTIC.

Also anyone here have Starz? I need to gush over "P-Valley" and cry over "Hightown" s3 with someone! "Raising Kanan" is good but not hitting me in the feels the same way.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 29/09/2023

I Saw a Brainwasher Today

Season 1 Featured on: GilvaSunner's Highest Quality Video Game Rips: Volume FOUR HOURS! Also on: PC Master Rips

Ripped by Xarlable

It shocked me to realize that, four months into this blog's lifespan, I've still barely touched the SiIvaGunner channel's first big story event - Season 1's Reboot. To many, myself included, it was a turning point for how they consumed the channel: It escalated the channel from a joke or a one-trick pony into something truly worth taking seriously, with an ongoing narrative and stakes at play that many of us didn't even realize were possible.

So lets set the stage, briefly. We're about four months into the SiIvaGunner channel's life in 2016, and most things are proceeding just as they always have. Funny Flintstones! Funny mashups! Funny screams and funny melodyswaps, a grand ol' time all around. Yet one type of joke in particular - inserting Snow Halation from Love Live into various rips - has been receiving pushback from the audience at large as apparent by the dislikes and comments left on videos. So things are proceeding smoothly, most people are content, yet...there's a sort of unrest bubbling underneath it all, a rift between SiIvaGunner and its audience, between what the people behind the channel want to do and what the audience wants to receive. After a long buildup, the camel's back snaps in two, and the Reboot commences - in direct response to the neverending bitterness of those against Snow Halation's inclusion on SiIvaGunner as a whole.

The Reboot was simple in concept - the in-universe entity that runs the channel runs into a fatal error and restarts itself, only "refreshing" all of its jokes in the process with similar-enough equivalences. The Flintstones theme is replaced with The Simpsons theme - the "loudest orgasm" scream is replaced with the Howie Scream - Love Live's presence on the channel is replaced with IDOLM@STER, and so on and so forth. Even without the story videos laying things out and introducing us to The Voice Inside Your Head, the Reboot's statement was clear - as soon as SiIvaGunner stops doing what its team is passionate for in order to appease its fans, things *will* go awry. Being part of the community at the time (as a very new member right before the Reboot) was simultaneously enlightening and absolutely insane - we KNEW what we as a collective had done to deserve The Reboot, yet we had no idea what it would lead to or how to stop it. Needless to say, everything was pure chaos - SiIvaGunner had officially gripped me with its narrative and I was all in.

And that chaos is really why I picked I Saw a Brainwasher Today as today's feature. Compared to what we had before the Reboot, its so starkly different in style - its far removed from the typical Nintendo music that gave the channel its identity, its tone is chaotic and noisy due to the two songs mashed up, and neither of those songs had any presence on SiIvaGunner beforehand. Sure, in today's landscape its a pretty simple mashup of two similar-sounding themes, but its context painted such a different picture: it was the perfect instillation of everything the Reboot entailed and all the emotions we felt during it. Deep in the mix you can faintly hear the screams of some old SiIva memes, which adds tremendously to the atmosphere described - its a rip that's just flatly impossible to divorce from its original context.

And yet...here I am, sort of presenting the rip to you outside of that context. Hrm.

This blog's a tricky thing, huh?

[felixstudios]

Infodump about Felix

Appearance rambles:

Even though he's covered in enby pride flags, Felix as a character isn't enby. I'm just projecting my pride onto his design since he's one of my main fursonas + he looks amazing in it

The pride flag on his backpack comes from a content pack someone named Trick made for me a long time ago. I asked for the texture to be changed and said surprise me, and that's what I got. I've kept it as his canon design since.

That also inspired me to add more enby flags to his design, which were added in with content packs {except the one on his shorts}.

The shirt and shorts are the ones they are 80% because I literally didn't know what else to wear and 20% because I actually thought it looked cool. Actually, that's... a lot of his outfit.

I got the shoes during ToonFest 2023 when all the previous codes became public. They look terrible on him and do not fit his color palette or aesthetic. I love them <3

He used to be a tall Toon, but I wanted to look closer in appearance to someone else's Toon so I changed him to a medium height Toon. He also used to be completely orange, but I gave him coral legs because I thought it was something I was obligated to do for being high laff because I saw all the high laff Toons with different colored legs. Past me, sweetie, those were elitists... but it's okay because now I love the coral legs and don't think they're an abomination!

Basically, he's very much thrown together from outside influences and I wouldn't change it for anything now because it became his "brand"

OC lore rambles:

So once upon a time a Toon named Ghostly Felix glitched so bad that his immersion in the world was completely broken and he realized he was in a video game. This was exciting at first and he hacked in max everything, cheated to be invisible so he could hilariously kill bosses with just bike horns or something, ETC.

But after a few years he got bored and basically started pondering his existence. So he created a Toon named Felix so he could be invisible and watch him complete the game so he'd have something to do. When just Felix was boring, he made Cap'n Felix, Doctor Felix, Mr. Felix, Judge Felix, Midnight Felix, Spooky Felix, Frozen Felix, Lucky Felix, Fairy Felix, Prince Felix... you get the idea.

Well, on the day Felix reached 140 laff he found Ghostly Felix by a weird glitch. At first Felix thought he was a new Felixverse addition, but realized that Ghostly Felix already had 140 laff and was acting really scared for some reason. Finally, Ghostly Felix spilled the beans about the fact it was a game and how he created the Felixverse

Felix was horrified to find out he was right, and he instantly got pretty bummed out and asked what the point of his existence is.

Eventually, this was his answer: "To have fun. You don't need to spend so long thinking about it or making it complicated- it really is that simple."

Other rambles:

His name is Felix because when I first played TTR, I tried to name him Shaun because that was my name at the time. It was instantly denied, so naive me thought "too many Toons must have that name already" and picked a random pick-a-name. I didn't expect to really get attached to my Toon or particularly care about him, which is also why he's such an obnoxious orange instead of literally any color I actually liked at the time. Well, orange is now my second favorite color because of him and I wouldn't change his appearance for the world.

He's not based off of a TTO Toon. I only remember one Toon I made in TTO, which was a red rabbit named Raboon {"rabbit" + "toon"}. I've already remade Raboon in TTR on a different Toon slot, but I didn't want to be a rabbit in TTR when I was first starting, I wanted to be a cat! So that's why I made a new Toon.

Originally when my Felixverse lore was much more resembling a kid's cartoon {yes the entire old lore that I told literally nobody was retconned lol}, he had a love interest Toon named Felixia. She was an orange cat who, like older cartoons, was basically supposed to be a copy/paste of him except feminine and cutesy. I do not have any Toons named Felixia in any of my TTR or TTCC accounts, but when I used to play Toontown Offline I did make her an unreasonably overpowered SOS Toon who would use marbles that did 200 damage.

Felix's name is actually pronounced in German, meaning that it's pronounced kinda like fae-lix rather than how most people pronounce it to me, which is fee-lix.

Speaking of his name, if it wasn't evident enough already, he was Felix before I was Felix. He basically became my identity online over time.

[nekoannie-chan]

Love or curse?

Title: Love or curse?

Fandom: Marvel, Captain America.

Ship: Steve Rogers X Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.!Mutant!Reader.

Word count: 579 words.

Rating: Teen.

Summary: You and Steve hate each other, or not?

Major Tags: Love bug, curse.

Additional tags: This is my entry to @sweetspicybingo, Sweetheart Bingo Card & square 4:

"Love bug.”

You can read it on Wattpad and Ao3.

@saiyanprincessswanie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission for my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish:  Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter. 

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme @bluemusickid @leyannrae @harrysthiccthighss @marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1 @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted @chemtrails-club  @marigoldreamer @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @here4thefanfics @theestorm @patzammitt @kmc1989 @somegirlfrom

You ran as fast as you could to escape; although you had failed to obtain the Darkhold, you had obtained another important element. You mentally cursed Steve, telling him that you were not the right one for the mission, but he insisted, and of course, everyone listened to him.

But you couldn't stand it, simply because you owed Fury a favor by agreeing to be on the team, not to mention the fact that it seemed Tony had deliberately put you on the missions as a pair.

"Did you bring it?" Steve asked as soon as he saw you.

"Obviously no; I told you we needed a telepath or someone who could open portals; Morgan almost got me; I'm lucky I got out unharmed, but I brought the rest of the stuff," you said, completely annoyed. The only thing he had done all this time was to stay outside on "guard duty."

"We need..."

"Then go and get it," you spat, already tired of Steve's attitude towards you.

"Natasha would have brought it no matter what."

"Then go get her and make her bring it."

"You have powers..."

"And you're a super soldier; I'm only helping them because Fury asked me to; you're unbearable." You started to walk.

None of you realized that Morgan had seen everything; she knew what you had come for; she had even allowed you to take some things; she smiled when she saw you arguing and then recited some words. You never realized that she had bewitched you.

You couldn't stop thinking about Steve that night in the shower, but this time it was different.

On the other hand, Steve couldn't stop thinking about you either. The next morning, he got up very early to go for a run, but as soon as he saw the bakery with some cupcakes decorated with hearts, he didn't hesitate and went in to buy them, remembering that he had seen you eating those kinds of cupcakes several times.

"I brought you this," Steve said, offering you the box of muffins, which you took.

"Do you have any plans for Friday night?" You asked.

"Only if you have plans."

"Then I'll see you at eight."

"I'll be on time."

You closed the door. Lorna was looking at you confusedly from the other side of the screen. Steve had interrupted the video call they were having.

"Have you asked someone out? That doesn't sound like you," Lorna commented in surprise. "Who was it?"

"Steve," you replied without paying much attention.

"Steve Rogers?" Lorna was beginning to suspect that something strange was going on, probably as a result of the mission you had told her about, but before she did anything, she wanted to talk to someone who knew a lot about it.

"What do you know about this mission?" Nico asked.

"Not much; they were going for a book, and that it was a place where I think there was a sorceress or something like that," Lorna replied.

"Maybe it's Morgan... I think they have a curse; I'll have to find out how."

"Wait, no, maybe we should just leave it at that."

"But... " 

"Y/N deserves to be happy; there's a chance that deep down they actually liked each other."

All week long, you and Steve had been flirting; even the rest of the team was starting to get suspicious.

"Well, they say there is only one step from hate to love," Natasha commented to Clint.

[loguetowns]

Hi! I got into the One Piece fandom bc of OPLA and fell in love with OPLA Zoro lol. I then checked out the anime and found your animanga Zoro fics and they’re so cute, I’ve loved reading them :)

Would love to know your thoughts on OPLA too!

in the iconic words of lola tung, oh my goodness i love this question!!

firstly, i hope you've been having fun exploring the world of one piece!! i feel like getting into a new fandom can be so overwhelming sometimes. with that said, i am absolutely tickled that my fics have been feeding your zoro crush ♡

as for my opinions on opla, was it the most artful masterpiece in the world? no. but did it set out to do everything it wanted to do? yes. did it make me wholly content and leave my heart full? absolutely!!

i'm gonna add my detailed thoughts below (bc there's so many lol) but i will say that i think it was a success!

i'm not sure what the general animanga fandom's thoughts were on opla but for myself, i tried going into it with as little comparison/expectation from the original material as possible and i think that's why i liked it so much. i remember reading that the team's two goals were to honor existing fandom and also bring one piece to a new audience, and they totally did that!!

on the production itself, i think the team did the best with the budget they were given. it's a netflix show, not a hollywood production. certain effects and post-production weren't flawless, but i can 100% appreciate where they chose to spend their money. the choice to focus on character design and setting helped to bring the world of one piece to life in a way where it doesn't feel corny seeing it as a live action, ya kno?

storytelling wise, i can understand why they chose to keep what they kept and where they took out material/story. the essence of each arc was kept and the fact that they were able to introduce new plot and keep the core story intact within 8 episodes was a huge win.

it's funny because syrup village and baratie are two arcs that i don't care for but i adored them in opla. i also didn't even realize until after i finished watching that the buggy arc was so different from the original but i think that speaks to how well it was done!

i also like that they brought in this little side story of coby, garp and the marines. coby was an effective tool to explain the world of op to newer audience members, and the dichotomy between good vs. bad and whether lawful = good was set up really well in a short series because you had this marine subplot.

and then, of course, the characters ♡ the cast of opla has my whole fucking heart fr!! i already knew i was going to love mackenyu!zoro as soon as i saw his concept photos. but what surprised me was how much i fell in love with opla!sanji and usopp! they are so delightfully adorable and i have big crushes on them now.

the other standout thing for me is that i think the cast did a wonderful job at capturing the east blue crew's initial innocence and wonder. after following the strawhats for so long, i forget how much they've grown since the beginning. like, they really were just a bunch of teen dreamers who were given permission to be free by this weird kid in a strawhat.

for me, i don't see it as the opla competing with the animanga, but rather it's another version of the same story that i can love as much as the original ♡

[n7punk]

no i'm going to continue to talk about she-ra merch actually. specifically, i want to talk about the different versions/releases of Adora in the fashion dolls (one in particular but we'll get to that). As far as I can tell they released this line in 2019, botched it, and left the pieces to the scalpers and collectors. I wasn't around for that so feel free to add context in the replies if you know it.

It kind of makes sense since she's the main character but half the line is Adora. The initial line up was Adora (in her red jacket), Glimmer, Bow, Catra, and a separate doll for She-ra, with everyone in their season 1 outfits (obvs). She-ra had a different sculpt than Adora and was taller than the others. That's 2 Adoras out of 5 dolls so far.

They also released the "Battle of Bright Moon" set which featured She-ra in her battle armor along with Swift Wind. I'm really not sure whether to include him in the final doll count, but since his quality was shit and I don't usually count "pets," I'm going to say we're at 3 Adoras out of 6 dolls. (we will be circling back around to this set it's the whole reason we're here)

The last set is the SDCC exclusive She-ra vs Shadow Weaver set. This has (as far as I can tell) the "same" She-ra as the original release but with a bigger cape and better skirt, along with a Shadow Weaver doll.

That's 4 Adoras out of 8 dolls, but what I want to talk about is the Battle of Bright Moon set, because it is SHIT. I'm gonna be using seller photos here because the official pics won't show you lmao. We'll start with what I think is an official photo for the SDCC set so you can see the usual She-ra to compare.

As you can see, she's a skin-color articulated doll with a fabric unitard, skirt, and cape (again, the regular She-ra had a less luxurious cape and skirt, but was otherwise the same to this). Everything gold is plastic, so she has plastic boots, gauntlets, chest emblem, shoulder paldrons, and tiara. Also a sword. Everything I just listed could be removed and put back on. This is what they did for all of the dolls, She-ra or otherwise, in the line, but Battle of Bright Moon took... a different approach. Let's start with in-box seller photos because you can already see problems there.

I wish I knew more context for this and maybe somebody can add it but from the best I can tell this was manufactured (maybe not priced, but manufactured) as a budget set. Swift Wind is a terrible plastic lump, but we have nothing to compare him to. Adora, though, has taken a big hit. The tiara, head, and probably the sculpt are the same but that's it. She doesn't have gauntlets at all, they just casted her forearms in gold since it was a separate piece anyway with the articulation. The skirt in the original she-ra outfit wasn't great, but this one is hot garbage, especially in open-box listings where it has often fallen apart. speaking of, lets go there to reveal the sin.

Yeah. She doesn't have clothes. They just casted her body and legs out of white and slapped a terrible skirt over it. At least they gave her actual boots instead of casting them like her "gauntlets." but the armor. It doesn't even cover her back!! It just snaps onto the front and makes it more obvious she's naked! They made this doll right twice why did they downgrade so bad for this set. The first time I saw a naked she-ra doll with a white body for sale I was so baffled because I hadn't paid too much attention to this one and didn't realize they'd done it completely differently (wrong. They did it wrong). I'm convinced they don't put a photo of her in this armor on the box so you don't realize how poorly done it is

[imagitory]

Okay, disclaimer here. I can't really call myself a true fan of Disney's Wish, just as it is. I do think the film had a LOT of really good ideas and I do think that a lot of artists and creative types put sincere work into it -- I mean, all one really has to do is look at the Wish art book to see that the creators wanted to salute a lot of Disney's overall legacy with their work. However the result turned out -- and I personally found it a bit half-baked with a lot of story and character elements that just didn't quite come together for me -- I like the overall concept enough that I've really enjoyed seeing the fandom embrace those good ideas and reinterpret them. I like the art people have started doing based on Star's old designs by artists like Brittney Lee. I like people writing drafts with villainous-couple-goals Amaya and Magnifico. I like people envisioning Asha as becoming a fairy godmother more in the vein of Whitney Houston's version of the Fairy Godmother in the 1998 Rodger's and Hammerstein's Cinderella! So everything I'm going to write here is from a place of sincerely wanting to add onto the original concept and perhaps improve on it, rather than just out of a desire to make petty pot-shots at the film.

With this out of the way, let me get to the crux of it.

(concept art by Brittney Lee, found in Disney's The Art of Wish)

Now of course people have discussed the concept of Star as a love interest for Asha before. And I won't lie, I do think it's cute! It could even offer a great potential for diversity if Star remained androgynous gender-wise, the way they are in the finished film. Honestly, even having a completely mute leading character and love interest throughout the entire picture would undoubtedly be a unique and special challenge for any animator and storyteller...and for those people who want to evoke old Disney projects, it would prove a great opportunity to build on the legacies of voiceless Disney characters like Dumbo, Bambi, and Tinker Bell, while still adding a new twist in the form of this character being magical and therefore being able to express their feelings not just through colors and body language like Tink does, but perhaps also through the instrumental score! You could embody the whole core of Fantasia -- a passion project of Uncle Walt's that he never saw appreciated in his lifetime but is widely considered to be a masterpiece of animation and music -- in one character!

This leads nicely into another tack this could've played into -- the idea that Star could be an embodiment of Golden/Silver Age Disney, while Asha embodies Renaissance/Revival Disney. Star could be endlessly optimistic and a bit naive, but strangely resilient -- something that seems fragile and helpless at first glance until you realize just how many people and creatures alike gravitate toward them and want to help and protect them. Meanwhile Asha could be all about proving herself -- she could want to become a powerful magician and do great things like her master King Magnifico, but lack confidence in her own abilities and feel isolated thanks to how much her service to and desire to honor Magnifico has isolated her from others.

Star would be Snow White to Asha's Tiana. The Aurora to her Mulan. The Tinker Bell to Asha's Elsa. The bright star to Asha's cool, thoughtful night.

And this is what I love most about this idea -- their relationship wouldn't need to be romantic. It could be platonic. It could be romance-adjacent. Or, if one wants to really go and do something different for a Disney movie...Star could be a child. A mute, sweet, brand-new star, one just born, that responded to a wish that Asha made when she thought no one could hear -- a wish she has trouble admitting to anyone, especially her mentor and toxic father figure, King Magnifico -- because as much as she plays contentment, there is a part of Asha deep down that wants something more. That remembers the loving embrace of her deceased parents and how much Magnifico can't quite capture that warmth and nurturing, however tight his hold might be and placating his words might be. And out of that wish is born this little bundle of stardust, which Asha is now suddenly responsible for and wants desperately to hide and protect from Magnifico.

In essence, Asha would be put in the same position that Willow is put in, when he suddenly becomes the caretaker for baby Elora in the film Willow.

Now that would change up the context for At All Costs, wouldn't it? This lullaby-like song would resonate awfully well in a story where Magnifico sees Asha as an apprentice and almost surrogate daughter and wants to "protect" her a la Mother Gothel by controlling everything in her life, while Asha sees this new Star who's now reliant on her and feels this strange, new desire to protect them from the man who filled the role of her father after his death in a selfless way that man could never understand?

If someone tried to hurt you... I don't see how that could happen! I'd fight for you in ways you can't imagine! Felt this? No, I haven't -- I hope it would be alright to Stay right here beside you...

It would be such a beautiful picture on how love can be both selfish and selfless -- how a villainous person can love, perhaps, but that that love is poisoned by the desire to mold someone into your image and hoard that person away from others who could "take them away" or "change" them...how love at its truest core is selflessness and fighting on behalf of others, to give them a world where they could live safely. And again, this could be either in a scenario where Star is Asha's "child" or her peer -- for a world can't be safe for all if anyone is under threat because of who we are. And Asha, Star, and Rosas all deserve to know true happiness, not just mindless, complacent contentment -- the happiness that can come from the birth of ideas we never thought possible, until we're given the freedom to dream and dream big.

[baki-tiene-un-simp]

Hiii💕💕💕 I wanted to make a request for mumon with an s/o that owns a litlle shop similar to kozue's father and she works there and feeds mumon and makes sure he is allways fed

Situation: Mumon with an S/O who owns a ramen shop / Mumon con un S/O que tiene una tienda de ramen.

Mumon Katsuragi.

Mumon was magnetically attracted to the S/O's ramen stand ever since he saw it in a park. The yellow lights over the bar, the five unoccupied seats for him to choose from, the reddish flags that covered part of the S/O's face while cooking, the aroma that wafted through and made his stomach growl.

A fleeting thought made Mumon laugh nostalgically, “Are all ramen restaurants in places as desolate as this?”

His thoughts overwhelmed him for a few seconds, a strong feeling of nostalgia and sadness crawled up his throat, almost taking the wind out of him. The surroundings became fuzzy and dark, consuming him.

“Hey!”, the unknown voice disconnected him from his sadness, enveloping him in curiosity so that he would look for the origin, “This way, boy.”

Maybe they were his eyes used to wandering through the darkness of the night, but he felt blinded by the brightness of the person who was watching him with their hands on their waist. That slight calm expression and firm posture of theirs brought a different mental image to him. He took a deep breath because of that.

“You look very thin,” their observation was a confusing comment for Mumon, he even observed himself to understand the words he heard.

“What?” His confused expression produced a laugh from the other person.

“Are you hungry?” They didn't give him an answer or explanation for their previous comment, they just called him to come over, “Have a seat and I'll prepare something for you to eat.”

“I'm sorry,” Mumon shook his head, rejecting their proposal, “I don't have any money with me.”

“It's not what I asked,” Mumon's face reflected his surprise after the S/O's laughter, “I'll invite you, come on, sit down.”

He wasn't really talkative for a few minutes, staying quiet as the S/O idly talked about what ingredients they have available and which ones they can add additionally to Mumon's order. He just smiled and thanked them for the kindness.

The S/O was warm to him, speaking familiarly as they cooked for Mumon, asking about him and his interests, appearing genuinely fascinated by everything Mumon could tell.

The company was pleasant and the food was incredible, at some point during the night Mumon felt a kind of déjà vu. As if an old memory had come to life. It was nice.

It was like putting a Band-Aid on an untreated wound.

The S/O asked him to come back whenever he wanted, that they would be there and that they would be happy to receive him. And Mumon took their word very seriously.

He returned three nights later, this time with money and a calm smile on his face. Those three nights became two, those two nights became one and when he realized it, Mumon went every night to see the S/O; He would pay to eat or not.

“I'm happy to see you better,” the S/O's comment left Mumon somewhat curious in the middle of his bowl of ramen.

“Um?”, he ignored the S/O's reprimand for speaking with his mouth full, “What are you trying to say to that?”

“You look happy,” Mumon looked at the S/O strangely, as if a second head was growing from their neck, “Your eyes don't shine with sadness like the first time you saw my ramen stand.”

The boy blinked perplexed by their words, remembering the bitter feeling he had on that occasion, feeling a little distant now. Maybe less sad.

“I was very worried that time,” the S/O admitted, “You seemed to be lost in great sadness, even when you smiled the first time that time, I noticed it. There was something that made you sad."

“Aren't I good at hiding my feelings?” Mumon took that as a joke.

“Sadness is hard to hide,” he hummed at the S/O's statements, “It escapes through your eyes and through your skin, and the harder you try to hide it, the more it shows.”

Mumon listened silently after noticing that his plate was already empty, he stood there for a few seconds before looking up and meeting the S/O's calm smile. It was a good comfort, he was sure.

“I think you're right,” he admitted with a small sigh.

Then, Mumon heard the S/O continue talking, being kind and doing what they loved. An insistent thought kept rolling through his head because of that.

“Are all Ramen restaurant owners this nice?”

Versión en español

Mumon Katsuragi.

Mumon se sintió magnéticamente atraído por el puesto de ramen del S/O desde que la vio en un parque. Las luces amarillas sobre la barra, los cinco asientos desocupados para que pudiera escoger, las banderas rojizas que cubrían parte del rostro del S/O al cocinar, el aroma que flotaba y que le hacía rugir el estómago.

Un fugaz pensamiento hizo reír nostálgicamente a Mumon, “¿todos los restaurantes de ramen están en lugares tan desolados como este?”

Sus pensamientos lo abrumaron durante unos segundos, un fuerte sentimiento de nostalgia y tristeza escalo por su garganta, casi quitándole el aire. Su alrededor se volvió difuso y oscuro, consumiéndolo.

“¡Oye!”, la voz desconocida lo desconecto de su tristeza, envolviéndolo en curiosidad para que buscara el origen, “Por aquí chico”

Quizá eran sus ojos acostumbrados a vagar por la oscuridad de la noche, pero se sintió cegado por el brillo de la persona que lo observaba con las manos en la cintura. Esa ligera expresión calmada y la postura firme le trajeron una imagen mental diferente. Tomo una profunda respiración a causa de eso.

“Te ves muy delgado”, su observación fue un comentario confuso para Mumon, incluso se observó a sí mismo para comprender las palabras que escuchaba.

“¿Qué?”, su mueca confundida produjo una risa en la otra persona.

“¿Tienes hambre?”, no le dio una respuesta o explicación por su comentario anterior, solo le llamo para que se acercara, “Toma asiento y prepararé algo para que comas”

“Lo siento”, Mumon negó con la cabeza, rechazando su propuesta, “No tengo dinero conmigo”

“No es lo que pregunte”, el rostro de Mumon reflejo su sorpresa tras la risa del S/O, “Yo invito, vamos, siéntate”

Él no fue realmente hablador durante unos minutos, se quedó callado mientras el S/O hablaba distraídamente sobre los ingredientes que tiene disponibles y cuáles puede agregar adicionalmente al pedido de Mumon. Él solo sonrió y agradeció la amabilidad.

El S/O fue cálido con él, hablando con familiaridad mientras cocinaba para Mumon, preguntando por él y sus intereses, mostrándose genuinamente fascinado por cada cosa que Mumon podía contar.

La compañía fue agradable y la comida fue increíble, en algún momento de la noche Mumon sintió una especie de déjà vu. Como si un viejo recuerdo hubiera cobrado vida. Fue agradable.

Fue como poner una curita en una herida no tratada.

El S/O les pidió que volvieran cuando quisieran, que ellos estarían allí y que estarían felices de recibirlo. Y Mumon tomo sus palabras con mucha seriedad.

Regreso tres noches después, esta vez con dinero y una sonrisa tranquila en su rostro. Esas tres noches se volvieron dos, esas dos noches se volvieron una y cuando se dio cuenta, Mumon iba todos los días a ver al S/O; pagara por comer o no.

“Estoy feliz de verte mejor”, el comentario del S/O dejo a Mumon algo curioso en medio de su plato de ramen.

“Um?”, él ignoró la reprimenda del S/O por hablar con la boca llena, “¿Qué tratas de decir con eso?”

“Te ves feliz”, Mumon observo con extrañeza al S/O, como si una segunda cabeza les naciera del cuello, “Tus ojos no brillan con tristeza como la primera vez que viste mi puesto de ramen”

El muchacho parpadeo perplejo por sus palabras, recordando el amargo sentimiento que tuvo en esa ocasión, sintiéndolo un poco lejano ahora. Quizá menos triste.

“Me preocupé mucho esa vez”, el S/O admitió, “Parecías estar perdido en una gran tristeza, incluso cuando sonreíste la primera vez esa vez, lo note. Había algo que te ponía triste”

“¿Acaso no soy bueno escondiendo mis sentimientos?”, Mumon tomo eso como una broma.

“La tristeza es difícil de esconder”, él tarareó ante las afirmaciones del S/O, “Se escapa por los ojos y por la piel, y mientras más te esfuerces por esconderla, más se nota”

Mumon escucho en silencio después de notar que su plato ya estaba vacío, se quedó allí durante unos segundos antes de levantar la mirada y encontrar la sonrisa calmada del S/O. Era un buen consuelo, estaba seguro.

“Creo que tienes razón”, admitió con un pequeño suspiro.

Entonces, Mumon escucho al S/O seguir hablando, siendo amable y haciendo lo que amaba. Un insistente pensamiento seguía rodando por su cabeza debido a eso.

“¿Todos los dueños de restaurantes de Ramen son tan amables?”