#im dying to know her backstory

[lowestechelonabomination]

so I've read SB and you know that scene at the end? where Chuuya finally became executive and he goes to see his parents and encounters Akutagawa and Higuchi on the way? yeah so uh. when did Higuchi join the mafia exactly?? like Chuuya is ~16 in that scene right? so Higuchi would be ~14? I mean her exact age isn't known but I assume she's around Akutagawa's age. so like. she was Akutagawa's driver even at 14? she's been around the mafia for that long? what even is her backstory? how did she get there? ASAGIRI-SENSEI I NEED ANSWERS

[cherrysnax]

Demeter is afraid of bats so their main villian is gonna be this like. mad scientist who prolly created the spiders that bit her who is prolly experimenting on themselves to become some sort of bat creature.. like man-bat and the lizard mixed together but I don’t think this guy is in anyway sympathetic. he’s obsessed with evolution, he’s bored of humanity he’s prolly obsessed with spider-man (whichever spider-man exists in this universe is probably going to die or sumn 😭)

[wetsocksinbed]

Things I loved in the 2 Episode Release:

THE CLONE BOYS ARE BACK

Wrecker likes ice cream confirmed

Emerie getting a fucking conscience

Also, Emerie giving Omega's straw toy to Ava (Eva?)

Wrecker risking his life to save Gonky

THEY LEFT TECH'S GOGGLES AT THE SHRINE IM SOBBING

Things I Want to See in the Coming Episodes:

More about Emerie's backstory. It was very briefly mentioned that she was essentially Nala Se's first "Omega", and that Nala Se abandoned her when she was young. I need to know more!

Omega using the fucking force

Rex at least mentioning Ahsoka

UNMASK THE GODDAMN SHADOW CLONE HOLY SHIT. I'm still torn between Tech and Cody. He doesn't talk like Tech, but there have been references to Tech throughout the season which I don't think is a coincidence.

Hemlock getting a bullet in the brain, preferrably from Crosshair

Emerie helping to free the kids from Tantiss, and NOT DYING IN THE PROCESS.

At least ONE of the original Bad Batch members surviving to raise Omega because if Dave Filoni kills Hunter AND Crosshair, I'm burning Disney to the ground

[dailyadventureprompts]

hey! was wondering if you have some ideas/tips for running a dark fantasy campaign? ive been running one for about a year now and while ive included horror elements im a naturally silly person and i feel like i go a couple sessions without including something strange and off-putting. i do wanna be distinct from grimdark, i want my story to have hope and moments of levity, but still feel scary and like the world is against the pcs.

hope ur day is well :]

Genretalk: Dark Fantasy

Maintaining a consistent tone at our d&d table is a notoriously hard thing to accomplish. Partially it's because it's a collaborative game and not all of our players might be as dictatorially inclined as we are, there's also the dice to contend with and those little polyhedral bastards don't care about dramatic consistency or the wrath of god.

So it falls to us as dungeon masters to do most of the work, but luckily I've found that evoking a specific genre can be pretty easily done through keeping a few ideas in mind while we're running scenes and building out our worlds.

First, a meditation on loss :.|:;

What makes dark fantasy dark? The surface level is aesthetics; dirt covered fauxmedivalism, horror imagery, gritty "realism", a lack of smiles and rainbows and happiness. These are all too common but they only reflect the feelings the genre exists to convey, specifically ones related to both the fear of loss and the suffering caused by it.

If people are going to lose something (whether they be players or npcs), you're going to need them and your audience to care about it, which means learning to build connections and evoke sympathy. Having those moments of levity is SO important because they're the point of attachment for your players, the thing that makes them care about this sometimes rotten world you've crated that they've taken on the responsibility of saving. If you skipped this step you'd be going into grimdark, which is one of the reasons I dislike the genre: death and suffering lose all meaning if there's no alternative.

Likewise, as easy as it is to lose hope, people are going to try to make the best of bad times. There's good food and the warmth of a fire and the company of friends and the chance of something better happening tomorrow. People are going to want these things no matter how turbulent circumstances get, so it's important to focus on them to give contrast to the darkness of your story.

Bad things happen to good people and there's (probably) nothing you can do about it

One of the central conceits of playing D&D is that the players are heroes, characters with a unique power and agency in the world and the ability to shape the outcome of events, specifically to beat the odds and save the day. However we can still lean into the dark side of dark fantasy by highlighting that while the players are privileged by their protagonist status, most other people aren't.

Most NPCS the party end up getting to know should have something tragic in their backstory; a war, a famine, a plague, a loved one's death. This will have affected them deeply and have coloured their outlook on the world and will set up their later dramatic arc. The town magistrate is going to have opinions about adventurers after her sister befriended a passing gang of sellswords and ended up dying in childbirth after being seduced by their charismatic leader. The townspeople are unlikely to rebel against their petty and sadistic baron since they remember his military acumen that saved them during the last border war. This also sets up the unexpected moments where the party can fight against the darkness of the world by getting people to see past the lifetime of cruelty they've been forced to endure.

A centeral part of the players having agency is making choices, but sometimes things go wrong, and sometimes there's no good options. Innocent people get hurt, there are costs that we end up having to pay that may or may not be worth the price. Keeping the young lovers apart and letting the unpleasant political marriage go through is the only way to avert war. There's a murder demon stalking town and the only way to banish it is for someone innocent to be ritually sacrificed, none of the heroes count, they've all got blood on their hands.

One of the best tricks I've learned to highlight the "no good options" approach is to present the party with a status quo that needs to change, but characters they like who are reliant upon it. It's easy to justify toppling the evil empire, those guys are jerks and are actively making life worse for everyone, but things get messy when doing what needs to be done involves making life worse for a lot of generally good people.

Messy decisions are what we want in dark fantasy because it really gives the party agency over the story. Are they willing to give up something they care about to perform an act of heroism? Are they willing to let the world tip further into chaos for the sake of seeing justice done? If there is no right choice, then what choice will you make?

The universe trends towards darkness

Worldbuilding is an important part of establishing your tone, and while you don't need to constantly keep ratcheting up how dreadful things are it pays to be mindful while thinking up new details for your setting.

Living in the world is a bloody business and people are all too often accepting of awful things if it makes their lives easier. On the base level it's the "kill people who are different monsters take their stuff" angle of self enrichment, but it gets more abstract as you venture into the non-adventuring levels of society. It's stuff like religions venerating painful martyrdoms as miracles, joyous feast days and festivals to commemorate some bloody event, national or family pride over participation in historic slaughter. A dark fantasy world is one that celebrates it's hypocrisy and compromises because it has long given up on good actually winning out.

To really hammer in that "fighting against the odds" feeling, stories/legends/songs about other heroes should either be tragedies or well known falsehoods.

Change (to say nothing of actual improvement) comes at terrible cost. It isn't fair that the world/narrative/universe is set up this way, but now the heroes have to deal with it.

Artsource

[pinyeti]

EPISODE 6: RETURN OF THE JEDI

Is it just me or have they just not explained the Death Star properly?

I cant take Darthy seriously anymore, he’s just a bag of organs 

Whats quirrel doing here

OMG ELEPHANT SNAKE IS BACK

Isnt this that old caterpillar from Alice n wonfderlad

WOW LUKE REALLY SUITED UP FOR HIS MESSAGE- DID HE JUST SELL???? GOLDENFACE AN R2-oh right Hans in the carbon - way to go to the dark side Luke, triangular droid trade YOU ARE YOUR FATHERS SON LUKE 

So much of Star Wars is just running into the problem with a glowstick and hoping it dies

Wow hansolo has been imprisoned, thrown into garbage, tortured, thrown into carbon, imprisoned AGAIN all cuz he has can’t shut my mouth disease

What even is their relationship with Luke btw, are they his adopted fWOAH WOAH WOAH WHEN DID LUKE TURN INTO A MAN??? Last I saw he was a child who couldn’t get a plane out of a lake AND THEY LEFT THE LAST MOVIE WITH ALL OF THTEM BEING TOGETHER wow the text in the beginning is more important than I thought 

No seriously why is Luke dressed like a pastor whats going on

WOAH GOLD BIKINI LIEA - OKAY STORY TIME I USED TO WATCH PRINCESS RAP BATTLES AS A CHILD AND THE ONE I SAW WITH LEIA IN IT SHE SAID “I wore a gold bikini and the whole world lost its shit” ANF NOW I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

Ok yoda we get it you’re 900 no ones talking about your wrinkles anyway with pastor Luke in the room, projecting much?

Is yoda suidicdal???

WDYM LUKE IS REaDY???? HE DIDNT DO ANYTHING TO BE READY EXCEPT FLY FACEFIRST INTO A MILITARY BASE HIS TRAINING ARC IS SO SHIT

 Whos the other Skywalker?? lukes not even a Skywalker isnt his name Luke vader where’s skywalkers real son OH darthy’s deadname is skywalker

BABY WONKENOBIII IS BACKCKCKC-OMGWHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WDYM LEIAS LUKES SISTER WDYM HE SUSPECTED THIS AFTER MAKING OUT WITH HER FIFTY BILLION TIMES??? WHAT THE HELL

??? HELLO>>??? WHAT TH EHELL??? WHAT IN THE GAME OF THRONES IS GOING ON??????? How is Leia a princess then?? HahahahaHAHAHA SO YODA KNEW …… ABOUT THEIR LITTLE TRIANGLE

Nice the gang is back together, waiting for chewbakka to be revealed as darthy’s next offspring

YES YES GOLDENFACE GETTING THE RESPECT HE DESEREVEVVES I LOVE GOLDENFACEEE

I cant believe these are the idiots the emperors trying to kill

"yes I could sense you were my brother when my tongue was down your throat"

Oh yes Luke hands himself over- haha darthy sensitive over dead name 

Luke youre so stupid- but since jedis cant die is he gonna go to wherever yoda and obi wan is 

Lando is growing on me, also squid guy

This movie is gonna end with emperor and Luke dead isnt it

Is the emperor a jedi too how else does he have power or something something Sith

Id make a horrible jedi- im made of hatred

Hansolo my pathetic little idiot

I JUST REALIZED WHO LUKE EP6 REMINDS ME OF - TROY BOLTON

IS HE BEGGING DARTHY TO KILL HIM WTF

You’re telling me this big of an empire cant take down 6 idiots lead by a happy go lucky guy, never heard of this before

OHMYGOSSDDHD. LYKE YOU IDIOT NOW HE KNOWS ABOUT LEIA

Hahahah a hand for a HAND- wait what…. Why does he have a robo hand too whats going on 

Luke stop acting like you didnt hear about jedis 5 secs ago

Aw does darthy have a heart among his organs

OHMYGOD DARTHY IS A GOOD GUY????? ????? What A VILLAIN TTURNS GOOD ITS BEEN AGES SINCE I SAW A VILLAIN COME OVER TO THE GOOD SIDE

OMG DARHTY FACE REVEAL

Oh damn hes not as ugly as I thought he’d be

Kinda cute even - bro how did he even get this weak why’s he dying rn 

He has such kind eyes

Yeah ok I am so lost I NEED DARTH VADER BACKSTORY RIGH FUCKIN NOW

Is the empire this easy to penetrate? No but they did it with the power of lOVE and FRIENDSHIP 

Love lando 

YES HAN THATS THE REACTION I HAD AN HOUR AGO ACTUALLY WTF

Yes Luke its so sad your daddy that blew up an entire planet in ONE second without a single thought died IM NOT FORGIVING HIM THIS EASY

No way thats it??? They took down the empire just like that???? What??

Damn no one in this world can dance

OHMYGOD ANAKIN???? HOW CAN HE SEE THEM NOW??? IS IT CUZ HES BETTER AT WEILDING THE FORCE

ok fine anakin is cute

(3/9)

[your-local-asylum-escapee]

What if instead of Merlin being destined to be the protector of Arthur, he's destined to kill him?

Ofcourse Merlin hasn't heard of the prophecies yet until the plus sized lizard tells him in the show. But what if there was already a well-known prophecy about Emrys and The Once and Future King? A prophecy in which Arthur is destined to kill Merlin in order to save Camelot from a deadly curse that is slowly killing them. But with a twist.

So the backstory is kinda the same with a few minor tweeks. Uther uses magic in order for Ygraine to give birth to Arthur, but there's a consequence, Ygraine's life. Uther tries to cheat his way in this by making Nimueh put Ygraine's name in the cup of life, much to Nimueh's protest that it will lead to a bigger problem (and consequence). It succeeds but Ygraine is pretty sick and is bedridden.

Uther thinks that her being sick was the consequence itself but then, two years after all that, Merlin gets born in Ealdor.

At the same time this happens a druid comes to the castle while there's a hearing or smth idk maybe a council meeting? and then asks to have a word with the king (Ygraine didn't fully die so Uther was still pretty chill about magic at this time so he wasn't that surprised about the druid, but he was very wary though).

The druid however tells the prophecy but only to Uther (Idk like he goes to Uther and whispers the prophecy in Uther's ear or smth). Uther immediately goes into a frenzy about how what the druid was saying was nonsense and that it was treason.

He kills the druid and then lures the other magic users to Camelot for him to also slaughter. Balinor escapes (obviously) and goes to Ealdor. No one knows about what the druid actually told the king but because they're so afraid of him after just killing all those sorcerers no one questions him until Ygraine hears about what happened and goes to confront Uther.

He says that it was some sort of lie and that the druid was wrong and a con, but Ygraine knows Uther and gets him to tell the truth. He takes a moment but then says that he'll announce it tomorrow for everyone to hear.

At a council meeting or whatever he announces what the druid told him. He says that Camelot and its citizens 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 or 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 cursed, he doesn't say why or how and nobody asks. The curse wasn't specified by Uther, either he was trying to hide what it was or that he actually doesn't know, nobody knows but it was quite obvious that it was a serious and deadly one.

But, there was a way to fix it. The curse will only be lifted once there prince, Arthur, will kill the most powerful magical being in the world, Emrys.

After this every knight in Camelot search for the so called Emrys to bring back to Uther and for Arthur to kill it. No one succeeds of course.

Fast-forward a little bit and the people of Camelot are covered in scars and are slowly dying one by one for mysterious reasons, those mysterious reasons being the curse.

Camelot's population decreases and becomes weak and vulnerable so Uther secludes the entire kingdom (or maybe just the citadel? im not sure, u decide ig) so their 'protected' from the other kingdoms.

More fast-forward and Merlin goes to Camelot (as usual) but because Camelot is kinda seen as a 'weak' kingdom, a bunch of guards stop him and question him first at the gate before he can get inside.

Merlin tells them that he's there to meet Gaius. The guards are kinda skeptical but calls Gaius anyways. Merlin gets inside the citadel and death scene comes and goes and the scene plays in 1×01 where Gaius falls but then Merlin saves him with his magic, just this time Gaius doesn't ask him who he was.

Everything just goes like in the show but its visible that the people aren't as healthy and as many in the show. idk how to describe it but like the people are obviously suffering because of the curse like there's more death and grief.

And instead of an arrogant and cocky Arthur in the beginning of the series we see a very kinda different type of him? im not sure but ofcourse he's still noble and stuff but he's also quite wary? (wary is not the right word for the feeling im trying to describe but its the closest so please bare with me for a moment)

'Cause in the show he didn't actually know about the prophecy (at the start, at least) but now that he knows it, i think he's gonna be a little like Merlin in the series? like he's already kind of burdened by the fact that he was the only heir to the throne and everything but now that he was the supposed 'saviour' that will lift the curse that has been hurting and killing his people for two decades now. i think that'll bring a lot of pressure in him, like sure he might pride with the fact that they depended in him and everything and that 𝘩𝘦 was the only one who could actually help his people but i think this version of Arthur is less of a 'everything can be solved with violence' since Ygraine is there and he has a mother figure to guide him and also shows more fear

Merlin is still Merlin but then everything changes when he decides to listen to the stinky ass plus sized lizard that lives in the sewage system of the castle.

Killgarahh-that-damn-lizard tries to tell the prophecy but Merlin says that he already knows about the prophecy. The wrinkly snake with wings just laughs at him and tells him of the 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 prophecy

Merlin's like 'what do you mean 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 prophecy? the prophecy where Arthur kills Emrys? wth does that have to do with me??' and the weird lookin' large stick with legs just laughs harder and says something cryptic and shit (idk how to be metaphorical okey? idk how to be as cryptic as that olde-velociraptor-but-uglier) and then Merlin's even more confused and asks him wth he's actually saying and for the first godamn time, the offspring and a shoebill and an electric eel finally stopped laughing and told him the prophecy

"The prophecy, young warlock, concerns you for you are the Emrys they speak of that is destined to slay the prince so his divine blood will flow through the kingdom, bringing Camelot's suffering to an end."

((that last sentence was inspired by a wiki post if your wondering why or how i got poetic all of a sudden))

This can end however you want to be honest. (or at least many that i can think of, unfortunately 99% of them includes someone dying)

One of them is Arthur dies (Merlin obviously wont kill him so either he accidentally/indirectly kills him, someone else kills him or he kills himself. depends how much trauma you wanna cause your readers) (you can also make it like even though he's dead, since it wasn't by the hands of Emrys, the curse is technically there and will probably forever be there)

Merlin kills himself so that he cant kill Arthur and in doing so dooming all of Camelot (this devotion is kinda like in the show where Merlin's sacrifices everything for Arthur but in this one its himself and not just a part of him)

they both kill each other¹ or

that both of them die protecting each other²

(¹ they kill each other because they're forced to like they're supposed to duel each other but they don't wanna fight the other so they just bothe self elliminate themselves ex. merlin effs himself and arthur

"i-cant-live-without-my-gay-twink" pendragon also effs himself and they live peacefully in albion cause i said so

² protecting each other cuz some idiot knights try to kill merlin when they found out he's emrys and arthur protects him and vice versa cuz some sorcerers somehow finds out about the 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 prophecy and tries to kill arthur)

OR they both shout 'FRIGG U' AT destiny (and the mushu wannabe that lurks underneath the castle like a troll) and run away together to find another way to lift the curse

idk im just rambling at this point ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[kosmicdream]

oh now i want to know why you hate one piece (just so you know where im coming from, i used to hate the series and thought was the stupidest thing ever and there was no way it was good, and then i read it and it was amazing and i loved it and it moved me in profound ways, and yet i did not forget why i thought it was stupid and indeed i can still fully see why someone would think it is stupid because, lets be honest, it is kind of really stupid so) yeah, im curious

i once loved it as a late teen, i even had one piece ocs LOL. One Piece is not bad because its stupid, or has toony art style or w/e .. but it is bad because its betrayed all the characters and core principles of the story that it pretended to be so invested in. in so many ways its honestly impressive. While i don't agree w/ everything said - youtuber Drizzt has made a very long mutli-series video essays about the various issues and i have enjoyed watching them as it covers arcs that i could not force myself to read. I personally kept reading to the mermaid island arc, but emotionally i dont think it was good when they reached the grand line. (laboon stuff was cute, but after that.. trouble) i dont really like alabasta arc and i feel like every arc after that, is just trying to do that arc again but worse every time. (all complete w/ a new princess character to be tossed aside for the next round..) i hated robins backstory and her part in water 7 (she was my fav female character in the series & i loved her powers.) i wanted usopp to leave the crew or have some real consequences w/ him and the ship. i hate luffy being like such a chosen one in so many ways he has 0 agency in the story, there's some to be expected but now its like at the point where i dont even know what else you could add. he really is the nepo baby of the one piece world. no one dies EVER and i dont even count ace dying bc who gives a fuck abt ace, luffy sure doesnt cuz he got over it in like 1 chapter after he died w and now he has a new retcon brother (who also was dead at least once i think and had amnesia) to fill in the void. franky is ugly as shit now. i could go ON.

[ghost-bard]

Main d20 fandom that hates on kipperlilly for being mentally unwell, for being angry and confiding in a trusted adult about said anger and then dying and coming back serving a distorted goddess of conquest and rage im so happy for you not ever having a genuinely fucked up thought because being an angry person and having thoughts of wanting to physically harm someone because of something truly childish is not a hell i would wish upon anyone but lord have mercy should any of you meet someone irl like that i hope you treat them with respect knowing that feeling insurmountable anger and not being able to truly understand why you are that way is not something that anyone who feels that way wants.

And i personally hope i never meet any of you and i think some of you should analyze how you talk about fictional characters with very real mental illnesses because YES it’s fucked up that she was jealous of riz for having this tragic backstory, but have any of you considered the fact that she was working through it with jawbone and then she fucking died and is in service to a corrupted god of conquest and rage and lost her closest friend and now has so much anger in her that she is now forced to put somewhere

Anyway apologies for the rant/wall of text i just find kipperlilly and the rat grinders as a whole very interesting and knowing how others perceive primarily kipperlilly deeply annoys me, especially now that im completely caught up with fhjy, and if some of (or most of i know how i sound most of the time) this reads as condescending or similar it’s because i was a bit upset when i started writing it lmao i have since calmed down

[zirobitches]

One Piece: Soulmate AU

Always in this twilight - Crocodile x GN!Reader

Summary: Soulmates are incapable of hurting each other. As a pirate, this leads to some tragic moments midst battles. You thought you were prepared for when it might happen to you, but damn you were wrong.

Gn! Reader, Angst no comfort, no beta we die like Roger, Reader is Croc's First Mate and a former Roger pirate (Shanks/Buggy's age) but it doesnt really matter, also former slave background, congrats you are now in the place of my self insert OC, no promises on not being cringe this is literally a /reader fic, also had to make a fake crew bc we dont know enough crocs backstory HAND IT OVER ODA

Word count: 4500+

Also first fic on tumblr, idk what im doing here, lmk ur opinions. It is now 2:03am and i have class at 10:30. Might have to skip lmao

EDITS: grammar check lol. also cross posted it on ao3 - same name as my blog

-----------

Soulmates weren't as common as you'd might assume when you first hear about it. There's an easy way to prove someone is your soulmate, but when that method is to harm them, well, it doesn't make it easy to find that person. And society gets a bit weird when you know your soulmate is out there.

you've known that some people carry around little needles to poke into strangers hoping to find the one. But that was in decent society; among pirates you more often heard tales of bullets suddenly dropping to the ground after they hit their target, or swords stopping on someone's skin as though it just hit steel. A battlefield is a hell of a place to meet the person fate had decided for you, but for pirates it had become a norm.

Not that long ago, some genius named Vegapunk did a study on how many people meet their soulmate - 1 in a 100. And that's just how many people find them. It never accounts for how many actually happily end up together. You had chosen to live your life as a pirate, so a happy ending with your supposed soulmate wasn't something you foresaw in your future.

You were always grateful most of your current crew felt the same. There was a small group among pirates that were always on the lookout to find their soulmate and then immediately retire. Your crew however like to joke that if they found them in battle, they would move out of the way so someone else could finish them off. It was a grim reality, but it was your reality.

However, on nights like these where you drank the night away, some romantic always had to bring it up.

"C'mon, did old Roger really make you so cold hearted that you don't believe in true love?"

"Pfft, you're fucking joking right?" You scoffed back. You always argued with Tink about this, but you understood your young navigator still had hope. Too bad you were the pessimist of the crew.

"It's not that I don't believe in true love," you continued. "Soulmates are real, I don't really see another explanation for not being able to harm only one other person in the world. But why limit yourself to waiting for a person you might never meet? So many are denying themselves to fall in love with someone else and then end up dying alone because they never found their soulmate."

Tink pouted in front of you. This was a tired conversation, one that was repeated every few weeks much to the chagrin of your other crewmates. But a controversial topic was always a great topic for a group such as yourselves.

"I'm not denying myself the chance to fall in love! I'm denying ever feeling heartbroken over someone who doesn't matter!" Tink tried to argue back, but you just groaned in response.

"And if you never meet the one? You'll just live and die without ever letting yourself even get a taste of what it is you're chasing." Tink glared, knowing it was futile to keep going, but the pink of her cheeks told you that the grog in her system was trying to get her to keep fighting.

It was then that a familiar tall figure caught your eye. There was your beloved captain Crocodile, trying to sneak behind everyone's back to grab another bottle for himself.

Crocodile was never much one for festivities, at least not one 'undeserved' as he might put it. While there was no battle won to celebrate, the night sky was clear and the waters calm; in the Grand Line, shouldn't that be enough to be happy about?

However tonight you weren't going to let him sneak booze and hide from the crew.

"Cap'n!" Apparently the grog was getting to you as well. "Come over here and help me crush Tink's dream of a soulmate!" You laughed as Tink gasped at your audacity. The rest of your company seemed more or less happy with how the night was going, but your captain was still less than enthused to join.

"If this is the same soulmate debate you've been going on about for the past 3 years, I will pass again. You already know my feelings on the matter." Crocodile's deep voice reverberated across the deck of the ship. Even if he wasn't giving orders, he still commanded the attention of everyone within earshot.

He gave a long drag of the bottle in his hand, and then turned to walk away. However you felt it was your duty as first mate to pester your captain into spending casual time with his crew.

"I may know your opinion, but would you be so kind and gracious to remind the rest of the crew? Perhaps?" You called out to the dark coat trying to run from the party, and saw him pause, then turn to walk back.

You could see some of the newer additions to the crew cower. You didn't blame them, Crocodile was an imposing figure, and was developing a infamous reputation as a pirate on the Grand Line. But he was your captain, and he would never hurt his crew, this you knew.

"If I ever met my soulmate," Crocodile began, "I assume it would be when I attempt to kill them." He took another sip from his bottle. This was one of the rare moments he was not puffing a cigar you suddenly realize. It made his face look younger, as though he was actually a man in his 20s as he claimed he was.

As though he knew you were thinking of him, Crocodile made eye contact with you. "When I realize I can't kill them, I'll call out for you." You felt your heart skip a beat. "Then you can finish them for me."

It was purely the grog's fault for making your face warm. The lack of a sea breeze was also suddenly apparent. But you couldn't be flustered, not when you were the one who asked for this answer.

You smiled, doing your best to brush off the tension. You were still maintaining eye contact with him after all. "Well there you have it. Not exactly the opinion I remember, but I hope I can live up to your expectations, Cap'n."

Crocodile nodded, then told you all to start to sober up or get to bed. "I don't need a crew of drunks on the Grand Line, or else we will never make it to the New World."

Your crew began to disperse and you went below deck to your cabin. You really hadn't had much to drink that night, yet your chest felt tight.

You thought you had learned your lesson, but no. Even after promising yourself you wouldn't, you became attached to your crew. Even after your last one fell apart. Even after you watched your first captain, your savior, be executed, you fucked up and dove straight into a different crew expecting it to be different.

You laid down in your bed, staring at the ceiling, the world slightly spinning. Suddenly all you can think about is when you met Croc.

-

It was little more than 3 years ago now, wasn't it? A whole 3 years since Roger died. The weight is still heavy in your chest, but not nearly as devastating as it was in Logue Town that day. You were a wreck, physically and emotionally.

After watching the execution, you were too heartbroken to join the others in pursuit of the One Piece. Your world has just officially ended, the crew was technically already disbanded, but now there was no hope of getting it back.

You ended up in some local bar. No one recognized you, and in the haze of all the excitement following Roger's death, why would they? You had just been some nobody apprentice who happened to stick on his ship after Roger saved your life.

But your sorrow did catch someone's eye.

You sat at the counter of this dive bar in Logue Town, mindlessly stirring whatever number drink sat in front of you now. You had run out of tears, and sat stuck in some frozen state of grief.

However, this sad portrait of yourself did not seem to deter someone from sitting next to you.

You paid them no mind, just staring into empty space, not enough energy to even remember you were still alive.

"You were a member of the Pirate King's crew weren't you?"

A deep voice rattled from the stranger, but it was his words that really caught your attention.

"How'd you figure?" You had paused your stirring at first, but now focused on your drink to avoid eye contact. You were a mess, you could feel your puffy eyes, and were still sniffling every so often.

"There's no reason anyone in this town should be sad that someone like him died. So, you must have known him, right?" The deep voice continued, and you could feel their eyes staring, but didn't have the strength to meet them.

"Well, you caught me. Going to take me in and see if you can get a reward? I'm afraid you won't find any posters of me though. I tended to get lost in the crowd, you could say." After that statement you finally grasped the glass in front of you and decided to knock back what was left. If this was the end of your little pirating career, so be it. It can die with Roger.

"Will you join my crew?"

Your head snapped up at that, and you finally looked up at the stranger.

Long black hair was slicked back to show all the sharp features of the man's face. A strong square jaw, a prominent, perfect nose, and pale, piercing eyes, hooded by thin black eyebrows. Undoubtedly, even in your drunken haze, you were sure sober you would agree the man was handsome.

After a moment to take in this stranger all you could manage was a "Excuse me?"

He smiled - no, smirked - and pulled a cigar out from his coat. "I could use someone with your experience on my crew." He carried on, as if you were discussing the weather outside. He lit the cigar with a lighter you hadn't noticed him pull out. Perhaps it was the booze, but looking at this guy, he almost seemed… fuzzy, around the edges.

"Having someone who once worked for the Pirate King should help me become the next Pirate King."

The stranger took a long drag from his cigar, then exhaled over the counter. You didn't know where the barkeep was now, but at the moment, it felt like you and him were the only people in the building.

You should be mad. Enraged at the audacity of someone to come up to you on the worst day of your life, and to ask you to work for them. But you felt nothing.

No. That wasn't right. You did feel something.

You chuckled. Giggled even. A small laugh that built up till you were laughing, nearly hysterically. You hadn't felt like this sort of light headed elation in a long time, and it was nice.

After taking a moment to catch your breath you finally looked back at the stranger. He didn't look upset at your reaction. He just kept smoking his cigar, waiting for an answer.

"I'm afraid I didn't catch your name."

"I am Sir Crocodile, captain of the Neverland Pirates."

"Hmmm. Well, Sir Crocodile, I can tell you now that you have no chance of being Pirate King." You smirked back at him, propping your head up on your hand as you leaned against the counter.

This response still didn't bother the man. If anything, you swore he almost seemed… satisfied by your answer. Perhaps he knows what's coming next.

"I can help you out on the Grand Line and maybe help you get to the New World, but I promise," you leaned in towards this captain, staring him down. "You will never be the man Roger was. No one will."

Yet Crocodile was unperturbed.

"So you'll join my crew?"

You leaned back and reassessed your empty glass. You cast a quick glance at the bar and then back at the other pirate.

"Sure. I don't have anything better to do anyways."

-

You thought back in Logue Town you could never feel the same way about Crocodile's crew that you felt with Roger's, but you were always the fool. Now you are attached.

Now you need a reason to leave.

You couldn't waste your time or your heart with them. You had already died once with Roger, and if you stayed any longer you know you could never leave alive. You got up from bed - still plenty tipsy you swayed over - to your dresser.

Middle drawer, back left, underneath some no longer worn t-shirts was a small box. You opened it.

There were several small scraps of paper. Vivre cards.

As a child on Roger's boat, you were ecstatic to learn about vivre cards. A simple way to know the people you loved were alive and safe, and be able to find their exact location? It was too good to be true.

When you remember the feeling of Roger's paper burning in your hands at his execution, you knew the reality of vivre cards.

Your fingertips gently sorted through the papers you had made for some of Roger's crew. Each had a tiny name written in a corner. Shanks, Buggy, Ray, Gaban, Oden, and a few others of people who had been most important to you.

Maybe you could leave this crew and seek out the others. Rayleigh had always said he would retire at Sabaody, and your crew was bound to get there soon, hopefully in a couple months. The ache in your chest; you missed your old family. This could be the excuse you needed.

With a heavy sigh you closed the box and hid it away again. Sleeping on it would be good. Sleeping away the booze would also be nice.

Maybe then the tears would stop silently slipping down your face.

-

It turns out the excuse of seeing your old crew was unneeded. The news coo was kind enough to drop a reason to leave directly in your lap.

You stared at the newspaper for a long moment. The sinking feeling in your gut still did not go away.

You walked up to the bow where Crocodile was standing. He stared at the horizon as you approached the next island, Water 7.

"Captain."

Crocodile turned to look at you, face neutral, signature cigar in his mouth.

"Morning. The news any good?"

"They want to make you a Warlord."

Your own feelings were swept under the rug as your crewmates overheard. Instantly the deck was buzzing, the news spreading and making the once sleepy, slightly hungover crew come back to life.

"This is perfect!" The helmsman Diat yelled, a grin wide on his face. "Not only do we get the Marines off our back, it's recognition that we are some of the strongest pirates on the Grand Line!"

You would have laughed at him if not for the ice in your chest. Similar celebratory remarks were made all around you, but you didn't have the strength to pretend this was good news to you.

All you could feel was an icy feeling on your back, right where you had a large scar that tore up a long faded tattoo. But time could not get rid of the mark you could never forget about, no matter how much you wanted to.

Amid the spontaneous party you finally turned back to Crocodile. Amidst it all, he was still only looking at you.

Your words were quiet compared to the raucous around you, but your captain heard you just fine.

"If you become a Warlord I'm leaving the crew."

A couple of nearby crew gasped, heads whipped in your direction and murmurs quickly took place of all the yells.

Instantly protests, people yelling your name, yelling their arguments, but it all fell on deaf ears as you stared down your captain.

Tink of all people knew it was futile to argue with you, and turned to the man of the hour. "Captain! You can't just let your first mate leave!"

Before she could continue, Crocodile interjected. "You never planned on making me King of the Pirates, right? So you never planned on staying on this ship anyways."

This evoked even more protests from the crowd. Many of them weren't sure what you two were talking about, and some had begun to yell again.

The sounds were starting to be overwhelming, and this was not a conversation that required the whole crew anyways.

"That's enough from everyone!" You yelled over the cacophony. The crew went quiet. "This is a conversation for me and the captain, the rest of you need to beat it! Do something useful, we will make a port soon."

The crowd was not placated in the least, but it was true the ship would be docked soon, and there were things that needed to be prepared beforehand.

"You heard them. Get back to work." Crocodile finished your command, and the crowd dispersed. You knew they would still be listening, but it didn't stop you.

"I refuse to be part of a crew that works alongside the Marines. If you become a Warlord you automatically become their dog - then you may as well be a dog of the celestial dragons." Your tongue burned even at the mention of the world nobles.

Crocodile took a long drag of his cigar. He looked away from you and sighed an exhale of smoke, then dragged his line of sight back to you.

"I haven't decided yet."

You bristled at this. "Are you suggesting they already offered this to you? And I had to find out through a newspaper?"

Crocodile took yet another drag, and you lost your patience with his nicotine addiction. "Answer me Crocodile."

Your captain sighed through his nose this time, some of the smoke reaching you, a familiar smell after all these years. It once may have been a nice fragrance, knowing your captain was near, but now it blinded you and stoked your anger.

"We are almost to Water 7. Let's save it for there."

-

Tensions were high, especially between you and Crocodile, when your mood worsened when he disappeared while you oversaw the docking. But you docked. You got the crew into a hotel. During this time the crew began splitting into sides, which was not something you had anticipated. But you ignored it all until finally, Crocodile returned and you cornered him into in a room alone with you.

He had no cigar, and you had no drink in hand. It was a painfully sober room.

Crocodile sighed and slumped into an armchair. He dragged his eyes across the room till they met yours. You refused to look away this time, jaw set with determination to stand your ground.

"I don't want to be the Marine's dog," Croc began. "But they offered me a deal."

"The deal that our crimes are excused? Big whoop, as long as we don't get caught it's almost the same."

"No," he sighed, a large ring covered hand dragging down his face in exasperation. "A deal to help take down Whitebeard."

That got you silent. For a moment, as you recalled every time you saw Roger and Whitebeard exchange blows and fight for days on end.

"You? Take down Whitebeard?" You laughed, but it was a dry and bitter thing. "Your bounty is $81 million berries. Your devil fruit is great and all, but it is by no means fight and beat Whitebeard good. Even if Newgate was without his crew, our entire crew would be wiped off the map. You've lost it if you truly believe that this is achieveable."

Crocodile glared from across the room. Not his usual, perpetual glare, but a genuine, freeze you in your tracks ice cold glare.

He stood up, all 8 feet imposing over you as he stalked across the room. "I have let you say plenty of cruel things to me, but this may cross the line."

But you were his first mate and you couldn't fear him if you were supposed to talk sense into him. "Cross the line? I'm not the one who is making deals with the Navy so I can sail us to our deaths at the hands of Whitebeard!" You were yelling now, no, roaring at your foolish headstrong captain.

"If you take that ship and that crew as it is now to the New World to fight Whitebeard and his sons, no one will come back alive!" Your heart was on fire with rage and frozen in fear. Rage at your captain, who is very much overestimating his abilities. Fear for your crewmates who have no idea what sort of danger their captain was going to put them in.

Crocodile was now truly enraged on the same level as you. He sneered down at you as he suddenly grabbed you by the neck - much to your shock. "I wanted you there to see me become the next Pirate King. But if you can't support me for this, one of the biggest moments in my life since I've been a pirate, then I have no need for you anymore."

With his free hand he opened the door that was behind you. A group of Marines walked in with cuffs ready. "To sweeten the deal, what better than to give a former Roger pirate to the Navy?"

You felt all the blood drain from your face, as fear for your own well being finally pierced your heart. You looked up at Crocodile, and you could feel tears begin to creep at the corner of your eyes. "You never fail to surprise me, Captain."

"Well done Sir Crocodile." One of the Marines spoke, and you could tell from their uniform it was a Vice Admiral, though you didn't recognize them.

"A public execution of a Roger's pirate should be a grand way to ring in your instatement as Warlord."

You felt the world slow down around you and felt Crocodile's grip on your neck slip at the Marine's sentencing.

Crocodile began to speak, "That was not what we agreed on," But your ears had begun to ring.

Growing up on the Oro Jackson, you had picked up some neat tricks. You found out you were hopeless with the color of observation haki, but had a special knack for color of arms. Perfect against those darn logia fruit users.

In a blink of an eye you ripped Crocodile's arm away from your neck and you made a mad dash past him. And jumped straight through a window, glass and all.

You could vaguely hear a commotion behind you as Marines ran after you, but it was lost with the ringing in your ears.

You could hear and feel your heartbeat, pounding throughout your body as you ran through the endless alleys and canals of Water 7. You could feel tears pierce through the wind rushing past your face as you ran, desperately with no objective.

All you could think about was the way the heat of Crocodile's hand felt on your neck, the cold metal of the rings that had pressed against your pulse.

Have you ever really touched Crocodile before?

…

You missed him. You didn't understand why. He had just betrayed you - fucking hell, he was just handing you over to the Navy as part of his deal to become a warlord, but god. You wanted to be with him anyways. You're not sure how long you've been in love with him; his sharp eyes, the smell of his cigars, the rings on his hands, but gods above.

You had fallen in love with Crocodile.

In your realization you slowed down. Your legs and lungs burned, you were gasping for air and not just because you had been running.

Has it always been this dark? When did the day leave you behind?

You now stood in some nondescript alley, dimly lit a golden hue by windows that lined it. It was a long alley, each end blocked by canals. How you arrived there you weren't certain. But you weren't alone.

At one end sand had appeared. And from it stepped your dear, awful captain Crocodile. You both stared at each other, both of you panting for breath.

"I didn't want it to be like this." Crocodile's voice cuts through the air to you. You knew you should run. But for some reason you couldn't find the strength.

"I didn't know they would execute you. I imagined they would send you to Impel Down." Crocodile continued to speak. You just stood there and listened as he walked towards you.

As you watched him, there was a strange look on his face. You've seen it before but still didn't know what it meant.

He stopped walking ten feet in front of you. The light was still too dim to see him clearly, but it was fine. You knew his face well enough.

"I won't let the Navy kill you. Not after what the nobles did to you, it feels wrong." You had never told Crocodile what the scar on your back was. It didn't feel like it mattered anymore.

"I think I'll feel better about this if I'm the one who kills you."

You knew this was coming. The second you saw him at the end of the alley. But you agreed with him. If you had to die at someone's hands, you would pick Crocodile over anyone else. Even if it meant he didn't feel the same about you, it didn't matter anymore. You were so tired.

It would be nice to see Roger again.

But then Rayleigh's face flashed in your mind. You still had to pay him a visit. You still had to visit Wano to see Oden. You wanted to see Shanks and Buggy find the One Piece.

You couldn't see Roger just yet.

So, in a sudden scramble, you turned around and ran.

The ground where you had been standing suddenly crumbled. You felt a gasp finally escape your lungs as you realized you almost gave up. But not yet. You had to save your crew too.

Then you finally ran out of luck. The dim light hid a hole in the cobblestones and you fell to the alley ground. You quickly twisted your body just in time to see Crocodile's scythe of sand arc straight towards you.

It hits you right in the chest, and crumbles to dust.

Confused, you run your hands through the sand that has landed on your lap. You're not cut in half - instead you just have sand all over you.

Crocodile change his mind? He was letting you go? Thoughts and heart still racing, you looked up at him.

Oh.

Oh no.

The horror on his face was plain to see - that was supposed to be a killing blow.

But he didn't hurt you.

Your hand jumped to your neck from when he grabbed you earlier. But in retrospect, you had just been shocked by the action, he hadn't harmed you.

Crocodile didn't hurt you.

No.

Crocodile couldn't hurt you.

Because he was your soulmate.

It was the look on his face that hurt you the most. The disgust, anger, horror - this man did not want a soulmate. He did not want you. So why bother sticking around?

You scrambled back to your feet. Even if he couldn't hurt you, the Marines still could.

So, with blurry eyes and a heavy heart, you ran away.

Faintly, you heard a painfully familiar voice call your name, but then all that was left was the wind as you ran.

pt. 2 (if you want, but this might be better as a one shot)

[melusinealarice]

I saw someone ask for this, and I want it as-well so Im writing it

Finnick and reader (y/n) screwing in the arena as a “fuck you” to the capitol.

A final, fuck you

Annie doesn’t exist, quarter quel, no established relationships, just enemies to lovers, sexual tension and an axe to grind

Warnings: cursing, smut, angst, hunger games so yk, violence, mentions of prostitution, porn with a little plot, If you wanna skip there I’ll put a huge red heart right before ❤️❤️‍🔥🩷❣️

Backstory: reader is 23, district 4 won 70th games, family was killed,

“Look at you,” you turn around to see Finnick, and turn away covering your eyes. “You know there are children watching this Odair, wanna put some clothes on? Or leave anything to the imagination?” You say, “ouch, feisty.” He retorts, tossing a sugar cube up catching it between his teeth. “What are you? 12?” You say rolling my eyes at him. God he is such a peacock, and it pisses you off so much. He just thinks he is god’s gift to man. “12 inches deep in your mom.” He says playing into the character. You try my best not to laugh, and Finnick can tell, “you wanna laugh and you know it.” He says, a smirk on his face. “Funny, hilarious actually, it almost made me not want to kill myself.” You roll your eyes, regaining your composure. “Well, we wouldn’t want that now would we, who would be the pretty girl on my arm?” He says eyeing me up and down, “we are wearing the same thing (y/n). You have no leverage here.” He says. “Yes, it seems ive lost my clothes, usually its just you dressed like a whore, i mean if the shoe fits.” You fire back, now it was your turn to smirk, “what? Cat got your tung?” His face falls, he looks, angry? He pulls you in so no one else can hear him. “Look (y/n), you dont know shit.” He whispers harshly, his grip on your arm tightening, his nails digging into the skin, you like the feeling. “So i’ll give you a warning, shut the fuck up.” He finishes before pulling away, his facade back on. “After you m’lady,” he says, a fake smile that looks teasing now, as he holds out a hand to help you into the carriage.

After that interaction meals are quiet, you had quit trying to talk with him, focusing on the task ahead, getting out of that arena, one way or another.

“(Y/n)?” Your stylist, Ines says snapping you back to the present, “what?” You ask. “Never-mind,” she says, waving if off. You’re about to enter the tube that will take you to the arena. “30 seconds remaining.” The speaker says. I step into the tube. “Good luck,” Ines says. “20 seconds remaining.” “Thank you,” you reply, “10 seconds” the tube closes, “5, 4, 3, 2, 1.” You start to move up. Sun hits your face, as your eyes ajust to the light you look around. Water, you’re completely surrounded by water, well, you know who this arena favors. You get ready as the count down starts. “60 seconds” you look around, Beetee and Chaff are on either side of you. “50 seconds” you look at the cornucopia, you’re facing it’s mouth, there are throwing knives relatively close to you. “40 seconds” you look for Johanna, the two of you made an alliance, she is your best friend and if you’re dying you wanted it to be with her. “30 seconds” you spot her, she is already looking at you. “20 seconds,” you get ready to dive into the water. “10,” you’re shaking, “9” This is really happening, “8” fuck. “7” just get to the cornucopia, “6” Dive as far out as you can, “5” get onto the rocks, “4” run as fast as you can, “3” dont trip “2” you’re ready, “1” shit. The cannon booms, you dive in, you pull myself onto the rocks and start running, not looking anywhere but forward. You make it to the cornucopia and grab the knives and the belt. The first cannon goes off, you look for Jo, and spot her, you run towards her, “Fight them off, Ill get Beetee and Wirus!” She yells, you throw your knife, it finds it’s way into a tribute’s chest, cannon, you throw a few more. “LETS GO!” You shout to Jo, “ok come on follow me!” She starts down a strip of rock, you dive in swimming along side her. You all make it to the beach and run into the cover of the jungle.

“Ok wait stop.” You say after a few minutes of running, “lets stop here and talk strategy.” “Good idea,” says Jo. “I think we should play evasive until we have no choice.” Says Beetee. You all agree. After a minute or two of talking Blight talks, “ok, lets keep moving, we’ll walk as far into the jungle as we can.” He says, “alright, take the lead.” You say, motioning for him to start. Jo and you bring up the rear, half defending half talking and joking. “Would you two focu-” blight starts to say but he is cut off. “RAIN!” You scream, tilting your face to the sky, but something is off, Jo notices it aswell, you all exchange confused looks. “Oh shit.” You say with Jo. Suddenly the ‘rain’ turns into down pour, but its not rain, its blood. Thick hot blood. You can barley see in-front of of you. Jo grabs your hand “RUN!” blight screams, starting to run forward, you start to follow as best you can but he hits something. It throws him back. “WAIT WAIT! STOP!” Beetee screams, “its a force field, other way!” He screams, the cannon goes off. “Damn it!” Jo screams, you turn around. Stumbling blind, you trudge through the jungle, only knowing where the others are by hearing their voices. “THE BEACH! I SEE THE BEACH!” Jo screams, and you follow her voice.

You get to the beach around the same time as Jo. You hug each-other, a few seconds later Beetee emerges with Wirus. She is freaking out, you all are covered in blood. As Jo tries to coax Wirus out of the tree line you are checking the surroundings. “JOHANNA!” You hear, you turn drawing a knife, its just Finnick. But you dont put the knife back tho. “FINNICK!” She screams back. He starts running to her. Sometimes you can’t believe they are friends. As you look past, you see Katniss and Peeta, you clutch your knife tighter seeing she has her bow drawn. Johanna starts explaining the situation to Finnick, but Wirus starts getting on Jo’s nerves, who is already stressed out and pissed off. “Tik tok, tik tok,” she repeats over and over like a mad woman grabbing Jo. “OKAY OKAY!” Jo screams pushing her off. “Hey, HEY, LEAVE HER ALONE!” Katniss screams running up and pushing Jo, she draws an arrow. You look around, Peeta, perfect! You draw your dagger and before anyone can react you put him in a headlock, holding the dagger to his throat. “HEY!” You scream, Katniss turns, aiming her bow at you.“Let him go.” She comands, as if she has any authority in the situation. “Leave Jo the fuck alone, we just ran through fucking blood!” You yell back. She fires her arrow, but you dodge out of the way taking Peeta with you. “Shoot it again, I fucking dare you! This time, I’ll move lover boy right in the line of fire, try me!” You scream at her, pressing the knife harder into Peeta’s neck. He puts his hands up in surrender. “Woah woah, calm down.” Finnick says stepping in between the two of you. “Dont tell me to ‘calm down’! SHE HAS A KNIFE TO PEETA’S TROAT!” Katniss screams at Finnick, “How about we all put our weapons down,” Peeta says, pleading to Katniss. “Shut up.” You sneer, moving your knife to tilt his head up. “Ok look, Katniss, she just thought you were gonna hurt Jo, are you gonna hurt Jo?” Finnick asks Katniss, telling her the right answer, “No.” She says, arrow still in place. Finnick exhales, Katniss must realize your too good to be stubborn with. “See, now, (y/n) let Peeta go,” he says. “I’ll drop my dagger, but im not letting him go till she drops the bow.” You drop the knife. “Katniss, will you please drop your bow?” Finnick says, he knows, you’ll kill him, right here, right now, and that’s exactly what he needs to not happen. She drops her bow. “If you try anything I swear to god i’ll snap your fuckin neck.” You whisper in his ear, he nods. You let him go, with hands still in the air he walk to katniss. “Okay, good, we’re all stressed lets just cool off,” Finnick says walking to you. “Im fine,” you say grabbing your dagger. “No your not, your mad and you’re gonna do something stupid.” He says grabbing you and throwing you over his shoulder. “FINNICK! FINNICK WHAT THE FUCK! PUT ME DOWN- I SWEAR TO GOD ILL KILL YOU!” You scream squirming around. “Calm down” he says dunking you in the water a few times before straight up dropping you into it. You stand up, wiping the water from your eyes, still pissed off, just at him. He laughs, “god you know, you look so… cute when your mad.” He says, still laughing. “Oh fuck off Odair.” You say turning away from him. You wash the blood off as he turns and walks back to the beach. Jo joins you, washing the blood off her. Once you are both done yall go back to the beach, sitting together on the sand.

Some time passes, “Im gonna go get water.”you say getting up and walking into the jungle. Really you just wanna be alone for a little. It peaceful until you hear a scream, it’s Katniss’s name, but its not a tribute. “PRIM” you hear her scream in the distance, shit. You try and ignore it, not your circus, not your monkeys. You hear another scream. “FINNICK!” “FINNICK HELP ME!” What? But thats not possible, you’re not screaming. But its your voice. “(Y/N)” you hear him scream back. “DAMNIT ODAIR!” You scream to no one in particular, your circus, your monkeys. You run towards the screams but run, into a wall? But it’s clear, and it doesn’t throw you back like the force field did with Blight, you cant hear any screams anymore. “(Y/N)! Over here!” Jo beckons to you. You walk over to her. “What is this?” You quickly regret asking as Beetee starts going on about some science stuff. “Okay, okay.” Jo says cutting him off. You look to see Katniss on the ground covering he ears as birds swoop in. “Jabber-Jays, DAMNIT, I HATE SNOW! FUCK YOU, CANT YOU JUST FUCKING DIE ALREADY! HOW ABOUT YOU COME DOWN HERE AND WE CAN FIGHT YOU PUSSY!” You scream up at the sky, Jo is smiling, Wirus is mentally gone, Peeta is staring at you like you’ve lost your mind and Beete is just not saying anything. “Finnick flipped out when he heard your screams,” Jo says sitting beside you. Finnick is currently on the ground as well, but he looks up for a brief moment, long enough to see you, and you see some of the worry in his face leave, you look back at Jo but he stays staring at you. You look at Jo, a look of confusion on your face but you know exactly what’s going on because you’ve felt is aswell.

❤️

The hour is up, you run up to Finnick, holding his head, “shit, im so sorry” you say, he straightens hugging you back, it’s strong, and he smells like the ocean. Katniss is worried about her sister, “they aren’t gonna do anything to Prim.” Peeta says. “He’s right ya know, the whole country  loves your sister, if they ever did anything to her, forget the districts, there would be riots in the damn capitol. HEY HOW DOES THAT SOUND SNOW? WHAT IF WE, WHAT IF WE SET YOUR BACKYARD ON FIRE? YA KNOW YOU CANT PUT EVERYBODY IN HERE!” Jo screams, waving her axe around. Katniss and Peeta stare at her in absolute terror, its almost funny. “What? He can’t hurt me. There’s no one left that I love.” She says, “im gonna go get some water.” She leaves. “Lets go scout out the area Finnick,” you say. The two of you get up and walk away. You walk for a few minutes in silence before Finnick breaks it. “Im so fucking ma-” but you cut him off, backing against a tree and pulling him with you into a kiss. Its rough and passionate but hungry. “Fuck,” you pant out. “God you’re hot,” he says kissing down your neck. “Wait, what about the Capitol?” You say before he draws a whine from you, sucking on a sweet spot. “Fuck them, now they’ll know how I really feel.” His voice is low and raspy, his eyes filled with lust. You pull his zipper to the wetsuit down revealing his abs and arms and fuck, he might be god’s gift to you. “Is this really, the best, place?” You say in between pants and moans as he peels the wetsuit off your body, grabbing your breasts and massaging them, making you push back into the tree throwing your head back in pleasure. “I dont want to die never having done this with you sweetheart.” He growls into the crest of your neck. “Mhm oh god, me neither.” You say as you feel his bulge against your stomach. On instinct you start to grind on it. “Fuck thats it.” He says, groaning as he throws his head back in pleasure, “please,” you whine, he brings the rest of your wetsuit down and picks you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. You shimmy his suit down the rest of the way, pulling him out. He groans at the contact, “Fuck, you’ve hardly touched me and look at how worked up I am,” he says, lining up with you. “Oh darling, you’re so fuckin wet for me” he coos, running his tip along my slit eliciting a whimper from you as you grab his hair. He pushes into you with a groan. “You feel so good (Y/n)” he says, moaning your name. It sounds so right coming from his mouth. You clench around him and he lets out a loud groan, his nails digging into your arm, you like it, so much more this time. “Fuck, Finn,” you whine out. “Yea good girl, say my name, tell them all who’s making you feel so good, im making you mine (y/n)” he groans, thrusting into you faster and your moaning and whimpering around him, he feels so good, so so good, “so so so good, finn, mhm dont stop.” You whine out, yanking his hair harder, closing your eyes. “Open those pretty eyes for me,” you whine in protest, “now or I stop.” He forces your eyes open, looking into his as he fucks you harder, hitting all the right spots, getting all the best noises. You can feel how close you are, and so can he. “Finnickk.” You whine out, “I know, me too,” he grunts out, moving his hand to rub your aching clit, “yes, right there, please oh god oh god FIN!” You cry out as you cum for him, “fuck sweetheart you sound so pretty, you feel so good.” You whine and your hips buck up trying to get away from the overstimulation, “Finnickkk, please I can’t,” you whimper out, still shaking from your first orgasm, “Im close sweetheart.” He says his pace picking up, his fingers still working your clit. He hits the spot deep in you that has you seeing stars. You moan his name, as a second orgasm hits you, “Oh god Finnick, finnick,” you moan his name like a chant it feels so good, “Im gonna cum (y/n)” he grunts out, his thrusts getting sloppy before he cums inside of you, moaning your name and burying his face in your neck as he thrusts in a few more times. “God, you did so so good sweetheart” he pants out.

You both regain your dignity before turning to face up and flipping off the world. A final fuck you to the capitol.

The end, hope you liked it ❤️

Funny story, as I was writing the smut while my playlist was on shuffle, Ronan by Taylor Swift started playing, so I had to take a break and cry. 😃 so if the smut sucks thats why, it killed my mood. Then my cat came in and needed my attention.

[monggay]

heyyyyy remember this series? yknow, hermitcraft x the mechanisms, the one i keep thinking ill be able to post about once a week or so? well its actually apparently more of once a month instead haha. anyways heres cleo as ashes! rambling under the cut as usual!

also see: pearl as gunpowder tim, gem as drumbot brian, and mumbo as nastya-ish !

OK OK OK SO. their mechanism is their heart :) idea was from @octopus-defence-squad OH MY GOD OZ IM SO SORRY I JUST REALIZED THAT ASK WAS FROM FREAKIN SEPTEMBER and i only now just answered it even tho ive been thinkin abt it since then 😭😭

[id: a tumblr ask from @/octopus-defence-squad: having thoughts about a mechanisms cleo. maybe she’s the inverse of gem, all her body human except her heart. (i know this is jonny’s thing but i don’t necessarily love his backstory for her? maybe she was more of like. the body was found and the heart didn’t work but bc of Reasons everything else was okay except memories? idk i like cleo being maybe a bit less backstory-having before the mechanism)]

maybe she was found on a desolate planet with stone and dust for ground, inky black seas, and strange purple growth as the only sustenance 👀👀 maybe with some tall thin glowing purple friends

so anyways, the mechanisms are a steampunk band blah blah blah, they play characters as the mechanisms, an immortal space cabaret from the starship aurora travelling the stars having fun violence adventure ...and more violence! they were turned immortal by d. carmilla after dying/nearly dying idk

ashes o'reilly, the one who cleo is based off, has mechanical lungs after getting betrayed in the mob and killed off in a burning building, relevant song backstory here or a live one here in all its 2012 480p recording glory ft jonnys trademark gravelly voice and ashes being ashes (aka being ridicoulously cool 😳), its called lucky sevens, hit it.

but cleo's story is a bit different w a different backstory (found dead alone mysteriously, gets their heart replaced) but they have a similar vibe :) aka badass people who can kick your ass and also probably commit copious amounts of arson and/or murder

another inspiration for this one was this bernadette banner video haha

ALSO the skull is joe :) hes just. a talking skull idk

ALSO ALSO love the headcannon of cleo just taking other body parts for their own so thats a thing here :) hence the skin n also the cane (lil detail i kinda like, the hair maybe being like yknow how ppl put in doll hair? yea) anyways im p tired maybe ill add some more later :)

[texasbama]

I wanna ask your opinion on something bc im not black and dont wanna overstep on anything but have you noticed that 911 is like more tragic and graphic w trauma than necessary w black people than others? Im doing a rewatch and it seems like all the mains get reasonable physical traumas but then theres hen w losing nia and athena being beaten. I just finished the tania story and it was like more graphic about her death then i thought necessary not to mention the mara plot. Idk maybe im overthinking but the only other really graphic story i can think is the maddie one w doug hitting her but again wasnt nearly as bad as jeffrey attacking athena. I also think in terms of calls theres almost always a black parent dying and leaving kids behind and i just wanna know your opinion

oh no you are 100% spot on. while this is a show that showcases all types of trauma, the trauma with the black characters - minor or major- are almost always more violent and tragic in nature. it's abhorrent. Athena beaten the way she was. Mara's backstory and then comparing her trauma to a dog. A DOG. showing her taken away from the Wilson's in such a traumatic way. idk if you followed me back when 6x03 aired but Tanya's story had me sick to my stomach. I know there have been a lot of episodes of this show, but I don't recall one that has EVER been that vile. Is it a reality for little black girls? unfortunately. but to see it played out like that? i was disgusted.

and honestly, I'm sure if we went through each episode there are probably more examples. 911 is no stranger to tragedy but they definitely make sure the black characters trauma is the worst. I am convinced that 1) there are no black writers in that writers room. 2) Tim Minear and Co. love to exploit black trauma, specifically with black children. Overall this show is amazing, but they fail in a spectacular fashion when it comes to writing stories for these black characters that is impactful but doesn't exploit our trauma. They have to do better.

[loveinhawkins]

ring, for the one word prompts! any era you feel like writing, im not picky! i hope you get to feeling better 💙🫂

thank you, i am 💙 this ended up as a little window into Steve’s family backstory, cw: allusions to Alzheimer’s disease, vascular dementia & death of a grandparent.

His mom’s left her ring on the edge of the bathroom sink. Not her wedding or engagement ring—those always stayed on, even during the worst rows, like she was silently making a point that Steve would never understand—but the costume one with a fake ruby in it, tarnished round the edges, the one she got from her parents when she turned sixteen.

Steve knows she won’t have meant to leave it behind. So he picks it up.

“Mom?”

She’s in the master bedroom, just sitting at the vanity. She’s got that faraway look in her eyes again—the one she had last Thanksgiving, when Grandpa looked at Steve vacantly and did not recognise him.

“Oh,” she says distantly when Steve presents the ring. “Thank you.”

She puts the ring on her finger. Looks in the mirror like she’s seeing something else.

Steve doesn’t know what to do when she gets like this.

“You’ll be good, won’t you?” she says, smiling tremulously—like he’s seven years old and he’s being left with a babysitter, allowed to stay up a whole hour past his bedtime.

“Yeah,” he says. She’s still not stood up so he dares a step closer, puts one arm around her. Tries to look at her reflection in the vanity mirror, but she shudders, hides her face against his arm. He goes still. “Mom. It’s—it’s okay. Don’t cry.”

It’s not okay. She’s ironed his sweater for Christmas Eve at the Wheelers, and her father is dying, and Steve can’t fix any of it.

Mom, don’t go, he can’t say. Thinks of flashing Christmas lights and a terror he can’t shake off. Mom, I’m so scared.

He watches the car pull away from the driveway. Knows she’ll be crying again silently, and his father’s jaw will be tight with all he doesn’t know how to say, because that’s always been the problem with them, always.

I love you, they never say. I love you. I’m sorry.

[ceilidho]

So real about the acting, but then he also gets the best subplot with the religious trauma and his kid dying so like… like ig the guy who plays rip tried? (From memory he’s a decent actor…) but the woman who plays teacher Naomi broke me aye. Her actress and Barry blew me away but you’re right the rest were just… there? Ig? I feel mean saying that ehhhh. Idk bear deserved breeding rights.

Idk if this is spoilers but like there’s a scene in the second season where he’s all big and burly with bigger ish beard and a beanie I think and it just screams lone Lumberjack who thinks you owe him a womb full of his kids for letting you stay with him

i've actually seen the guy who played Rip in other things and I actually really like him as an actor, but in this? he kind of stunk, im sorry, dude (he'll never see this). he's a really good comedic actor actually (he's in an episode of Community and he had me crryyyiinnggg).

my god though these writers did NOT know how to properly use Barry's talent. and yeah they did manage to give him such a good backstory/subplot like the religious trauma and guilt....the dead child.....his marriage falling apart because he's suffering with guilt and ptsd (I think).....

also UMMM....THAT LAST BIT THAT YOU JUST SNUCK IN THERE..??? "you owe him a womb full of his kids for letting you stay with him" dude im about to fucking pass out

[foli-vora]

Female reader. Steven grant. Prompts: 21, 26, 75.

In my mind is something like reader having to protect sweet Steven, so she breaks up with him and he’s destroyed and begs her to not leave him or something but ends up telling her he hates her after the whole break up scene, and she leaves.

Break my heart with this please. I want to feel stevens sadness and readers heart breaking knowing it’s what she has to do.

CONGRATS ON 3K MY LOVE!!! PRECIOUS FOLI IM SO HAPPY TO SAY THAT IVE BEEN HERE FOR LONG RIDE!! It’s an absolute honor to read you.

my sweet love, i am so honoured you've been here for the long haul and i appreciate you so much! thank you for your request, i had so much fun breaking sweet boi's heart! i hope this is painful enough for you x

tear into my heart

steven grant x f!reader

word count: 2359 warnings: angst. so much angst. mention of the avengers/other marvel characters, brief mention of S.H.I.E.L.D & HYDRA, mentions of danger, mentions of death/dying, lies, a fake affair, break up, brief violence (throwing a plate)

Dread.

It fills you. It runs through your veins, churns restlessly in your gut and fills your throat until it feels impossible to inhale. Panic begins to build, with sweat stinging at your skin and bringing a wave of fog over your mind.

How had things gotten so out of hand? You’d thought for sure the situation would be contained, would be dealt with so easily. It was looking fine, everything had gone well and it was meant to just be over. Done with. Finished. You should’ve known it was never that simple.

Cut off one head, two more shall take its place.

How did you get here? Maybe you could explain, maybe you could keep him safe, maybe it didn’t have to be this way—

Bucky sighs, the crackled whisper of it falling into your ear from your phone and you bite down on your lip to stem the bitter feel of tears. 

“I’m sorry, doll. I wish there was another way.”

You swallow around the sudden dryness in your throat, picking at the blanket beneath you. The blanket you often shared with him.

The blanket he’d draped around your shoulders when you had a cold, the blanket you tucked around him when he fell asleep reading on the couch… so many memories with just a bit of fabric. You dare not look around to see the other trinkets and memories lingering in his flat.

“Am I doing the right thing, Buck? I don’t want to hurt him, surely I—we—can protect him—”

“I wish I could say we could, but the reality is I just don’t know. Do you want to risk it?”

Could you risk it by staying? Risk him?

“No,” you reply softly, knowing you’d rather suffer the pain of not being with him rather than the pain of potentially burying him. You needed him safe. You needed to know he was safe.

“Maybe once this is over, you could sit him down and explain everything. He might understand?”

Would he? Would you even get that far? While confident in your skills and abilities, there was always a chance of not walking away, and you might never have the chance to fix anything. Death has never frightened you — the possibility simply came with the job and you had long made peace with that, but now?

A trickle of fear buds in the centre of your chest. Could you die knowing you had left him heartbroken? Could you die knowing you didn’t utter a final ‘I love you’? Would he even know you died?

As far as he knew, you worked in an office. A simple job, with occasional travel included.

You hated lying, but it just seemed a lot easier than coming out with the whole 'Oh, well I worked as an agent for S.H.I.E.L.D before that went up in literal flames and I’m now actually stationed in London and employed by the Avengers on the recommendation of Agent Barton'.

Steven was nervous enough in the beginning, you didn’t need another reason to scare him away with that whole backstory. 

“Yeah… maybe,” you mutter, desperately blinking the shine of tears overtaking your vision. “Okay. I’ll be an hour or so, I don’t want to just leave him a note—I want to do it properly.”

“We’ll be here, doll.”

Knowing you didn’t have long until Steven got home, you pass some time by shoving clothes into a bag and clearing your things from the bathroom, trying to not focus on the way his toothbrush now sits alone in the cup. You can barely look at your reflection in the mirror.

Emotion claws at your throat when you empty your side drawer and pluck the single polaroid from its depths. You hold it between two fingers, studying the way he looks so damn handsome in his glasses and fully focused on the little book in his hands, completely oblivious to you taking a photo.

“I love you,” you whisper, trailing your fingertips over its shiny surface before slipping it carefully into the front pocket of your bag, unwilling to part from it should he not want to see you once you were finished with the mission.

At least he’d be safe.

“Take care of him, Gus,” you murmur to the glass, watching the orange fish swim his usual paths through his tank.

The door opens, drawing your attention away from the little animal, and in shuffles Steven, rustling with a plastic shopping bag and a tired smile that considerably brightens when his eyes find you. Your heart quickens in your chest, his presence never failing to send your system into a tizzy.

He’s too good for this, too good for you.

“Hiya, love. Gods, you would not believe the day I’ve had—”

Off he goes.

You love his ramblings. You love how he would use his hands so much as he talks, how expressive he would get and how he was oblivious to anything happening around him. He would talk and talk and talk, and you would soak it all up, hanging on every word falling from his lips.

Just for a moment, you enjoy the normality of it; the calm before the storm, the peace before the pain. He’d stop soon, realising he hadn’t yet given you a kiss, so you straighten before he can do so, knowing if you were to feel that simple, tender press of his lips you wouldn’t have the strength to walk out the door.

“Steven?”

The word gets trapped in your throat.

“—and then some kid knocked the stuffed scarabs over so that was a little disaster in itself coz you know what Donna’s like. Oh! There’s that new David Attenborough doco on the telly tonight so I thought we could watch that and order in some tea, maybe have a little b—”

“Steven,” you repeat louder, firmer, “we need to talk.”

Immediately, he stops. His eyes fly to you and you fight to weaken at the softness swimming in them. This is for him, you remind yourself. It’s all for him. He’d be killed if they knew.

“I thought we already were, though it was a bit hard for you to get a word in what with me going on,” he gives a chuckle, but your face remains indifferent to it. His eyes flick over your face, taking in your cool, stiffly set features and his smile falters. “You ‘right, love?”

Here we go. I’m so sorry.

“No. I’m leaving.”

He blinks, “You what?”

“I’m leaving. This is over.”

“Over?” Confusion twists his brows, his face pinching as the words ring through his ears. “What do you mean ‘over’?”

“I mean this—” you gesture between him and yourself, “—is over. What we have? It’s done. I’m done, Steven. I’m leaving.”

“What? No, you—you can’t. We—” he runs a flustered hand through his curls, his chest jumping with his sharp inhale, “everything’s great. It’s great. Wh… I don’t understand. I don’t understand.”

“I’m sorry,” you murmur before you can stop the words from falling, forcing yourself to swallow the feel of your heart beating in your throat.

“Is it the sleep thing? Love, I-I’m sorry, I can… I can figure something out! I’ll tie myself to the bloody bed if I have to!” He smiles, laughs, but it’s all nerves, panic. 

So many nights you’d woken to him up and moving about. The first time it happened, it was almost as if he didn’t recognise you, like he was so lost to dreams that he wasn’t truly there and was startled at your presence. It happened frequently, almost every night, and with the more you began to stay over, the more it became a routine. 

You’d coax him into bed, wrap him in the quilt and kiss his cheek with a loud smack, expecting his dorky little chuckle or an adoring little comment, but instead you were met with stares that didn’t seem quite so familiar. He looked like Steven, smelt like Steven, but the eyes… there was something there. 

“No Steven, it’s not the sleep thing.”

“Is—is it me?” He asks shakily, faltering on a step forward and bringing his hands together anxiously, his fingers turning and twisting around the others. “I know I can be a bit much, love, but I-I can change… I’ll do anything for you, anything—”

It pierces right through your chest, impaling your heart and tearing it in half. How could he think that? He’s lovely. So, so lovely. You’ve never met anyone like Steven. He’s beautiful. He’s smart. He’s kind and warm and so damn sweet—

“It’s not you, please believe me when I say that.”

No, it’s not you, precious boy. I’m so sorry. 

His hands begin to tremble.

There’s nothing more to say. It’s done. You let your gaze fall away from him, taking a quick second to gather yourself and keep your posture straight, ensuring to swallow down the pressure in your throat before it could morph into tears. 

He moves when you do, watches you pick up the readied bag he had passed coming in, and he steps in front of the door, holding a hand out in an effort to keep you still.

“Love, please—”

“I’m going, Steven.”

He doesn’t move. He stands there in your way, hands shaking by his sides, his lips pressing tightly together to keep the noticeable wobble at bay. 

“Please let me do this,” you mutter, the dull sting pricking the back of your eyes. Get out now.

“You can’t leave, love. You can’t, we—you’re my everything. Please—please, just—we can fix this. Whatever it is, we can fix it!”

He won’t let go.

Gods, Steven, please let go.

The thought of this all blowing out of control and someone finding him… the thought of it makes you physically ill. Your mind rejects the images of him hurt, beaten, laying bleeding and broken on the floor, his eyes empty and staring vacantly into nothing.

Bile builds in your throat. You have to protect him, you have to keep him safe.

There’s a way to make him let go, but it’s fucking brutal, and you’re almost certain there’s no coming back from it. But it’s okay. If he’s safe, it will be okay. It’s for him.

A bubble of self loathing builds in your gut. Please forgive me.

The words make you sick.

“There’s someone else.”

The moment holds after your spoken words, the air in the flat turning harder somehow. His heart shatters. You can see it play across his face. First the confusion, your words not quite sinking in. Someone else? No. No, you would never. The denial—you wouldn’t do that… no, you love him, don’t you? The pain. It pierces right through to the very core of you.

You bite down hard on your tongue. There’s so much you want to say. You want to cry, you want to apologise, you want to cradle him and tell him there’s no one else, there could never be anyone else… but you stand firm, watching the daunting understanding leak into his features.

His shoulders drop, and those tortured eyes meet yours.

“Oh. What’s their name?”

Your training kicks in.

“James.”

“James,” he repeats quietly, his throat bobbing with a swallow. “How long?”

“Steven—”

“How long?”

“A few months,” you lie through your teeth.

Lying had always been somewhat of a second nature to you, but here? Now? The words burn your mouth. The lies feel acidic on your tongue. It burns to the point you think you can’t utter another word.

“All that time?” He whispers in surprise, his voice cracking.

His lips press firmly together but the action doesn’t stem the tears that build along his lash line. The barrier breaks and they eventually spill, falling from his eyes and painting his cheeks with trails of heartbreak.

“Does… does he know about me?”

You don’t answer, but he seems to draw a conclusion from the look on your face. He gives a barely there broken chuckle, forced through shaking lips.

“Bet you both had a right laugh,” he mutters scornfully, “while your stupid little boyfriend waited in his stupid little flat.” 

Your face creases, “Steven—”

“I hate you,” he mumbles, eyes dropping to the floor as more tears stream down his face. “Gods I love you, but I fucking hate you right now.”

And with those final words, he crumbles.

His devastation is palpable, and your heart shatters alongside him.

He wraps his arms around himself, unable to raise his eyes enough to meet yours as he shuffles out of your way, freeing your exit and allowing you to leave. A warm tear slips down your cheek as you listen to the sounds of agony falling from his throat, spreading over your skin when your fingers rise to brush it away.

Every step towards the door is a struggle.

You want nothing more than to turn around, to stay. The door knob is ice cold under your fingers, mirroring the feeling of grief spreading out from your gut. His cries echo around you, burning into your mind with each broken inhale and heavy exhale.

The soul shattering sobs stop, and the startling finality of it is enough to have you pausing where you pull the door open. His curled shoulders stiffen and his body hardens, almost as if he just snapped right out of his heartbreak.

He half turns, his dark, wild gaze locking onto you from beneath the mop of curls falling over his eyes and you’re frozen from the bitter hostility filling them. The rage, the hatred.

It’s not the stare you’re used to meeting at night. This is different. 

The air changes, thickens.

He’s different. 

“Steven?”

“Get out,” he rasps, voice taking on a deeper, angrier husk and it’s not him—it’s not your Steven, “now.”

“What—”

“Leave!”

His hand swipes a plate from the table, sending it flying across the room before it shatters into pieces against the wall and you swallow a sob, quickly resuming your exit and aching at the sounds of further destruction that echo down the hall once the door slams shut.

-

moon bois tags: @acourtofsnakes, @greeneyedblondie44, @hope-for-the-best-98, @fangirl-316, @itswanktime, @stevenmylove, @ruhro7, @juletheghoul, @you-got-me-starry-eyed, @asgardiandeadpoetsociety, @excitedcurtain864, @chickencouncilrep, @bluestuesday, @katronautt, @what-iwish-you-knew, @totallynotastanacc, @bangaveragewhitewine, @chaoticevilbakugo, @trickstersp8, @rominaszh, @gooddaykate, @midgardianminx, @mishasminion360, @detectivecarisi-1, @quicksilvermad, @raphaelaisabella, @iceclaw101, @thatpinkshirt, @breakfastonpluto19, @withakindheartx, @sirpascal, @littleone65, @xoxabs88xox, @timpletance, @jitterbugs927, @randomchick546, @xdaddysprincessxx, @dnxgma, @astronomeoww, @dindjarinswhore, @Curiouser-an-curiouser, @h-hxgirl, @mischiefnevermanaged94, @mando-amando, @mx-ferelden, @xxvariant, @welcometostayingawake, @trinkets01, @shadowolf993, @mwltwo, @loveslide, @lccs-world, @artsymaddie

[botanybulbasaur]

love through fiction

stuff below cut because its just stuff im writing while i cry

a quote i keep remembering over adnd over and over again is tahta stupid "the love was there and it changed everything. if you even care" quote because. i dont like change. i like having positive impacts on people but i dont like when i change or when they change. it feels like im losing something, an aspect i cant gain back, a feature that people mightve counted on me for. even worse sometimes, it can feel like im losing people.

so its easier to just ignore change. act like the love and the hate is the only thing that changes, not time. act like we, humans, control how long we have and how the world changes what we love.

but we don't, and we never will. the world will keep spinning and the people will keep changing against their will, against the beat of their hearts. but the fiction i keep reading

it keeps sayingt hat the love doesn't need to change anything. the love being there in the first place is a miracle, a gift, proof that we mean something and that our actions give us something. thte change was there and it made love if you even care.

'slay the princess' does a good job at taking just what i fear and placing it before me. how terrifying it is to be the one who changes, and how terrifying it is to see people change before you. but despite that everybody tried to work together. the love was there. the love was there and it told you to try and change something

then there's the love that transcends change. dragon maid be damned because kobayashi (human character) tells. uak. tells this teenage dragon character "i am. im lying to you. im trying to charm a chaos dragon with sweet lies" after the teenager tells her that she's just a human and she'll die and she's inferior and she's lying to her dragon girlfriend. i think its been a while my memory is shitty. and the girl didnt leave her side later on when she was in bed for a while. she knew that kobayashi was ignoring their differences, keeping it stacked away that theyd die at different times and i cant stop crying. the love was there and it told you that you dont have to change anything. the love was there and it told you that to be happy you have to ignore the change sometimes

amd TOHRU (kobayashi's gf) dont get me fucking started. her short monologue in the train ride back home about how kobayashi will die soon but shes just trying to enjoy what she has now. her conversation with her dad knowing she'd get hurt when kobayashi dies, following her near breakdown just thinking of kobayashi dying. the love was there and it told you to hold on and slow down, that the change is later, you don't have to be scared yet. it's okay, the love says, because it was there.

last but certainly not least dunmeshi. i know i usually bring up marcille here because i resonate with her but i want to bring up senshi and his backstory. like youre telling me he too feels guilty about his family (i know theyre not related to him shut the fuck up theyre family thats what family is) sacrificing for him but it gave him the inspiration and the courage to be who it was. the love was there and it changed me from the inside if you even care. the love was there and it changed me for the better. the love was there and it saved me

yeah im just crying now. the love was there. the love was there and it meant cooking and exploring and selling your desires to the nearest demon and it meant befriending people you'd outlive by a couple hundred years if you even care. the love was there and it made more love despite the change if you even care. the love was there the love was there im jfn,. :( THE LOVE WAS TEHRE. THE LOVE WAS THERE

the love was there and it made kobayashi risk her life for tohru. the love was there and it made laios, marcille and chilchuck risk their lives to kill the red dragon and get fain back. the love was there and it made toshiro wander deep without food to try and find someone who exhibited warmth. the love was there and it made laios and toshiro really become friends because the love was in us all all along wasn't it. the love wasn't because of change the change was love. what made us what changed us was love. what we all have that leads us forward, even in fiction. god i need a minute.