#incorrect wrath

[kirbykonka]

Smaug and Bilbo girltalk be like:

“And I once caught them trying to make off with my silver spoons!”

“MAKING OFF WITH YOUR TREASURE?!

H A N G. T H E M.”

“Well that would be just awful, wouldn’t it?”

“SO TOO IS GOING WITHOUT YOUR SILVER SPOONS.”

[a-local-idiots-shitpost]

Mc: (holding a gun) I found this :D

Lucifer: let go of this you damn bastard!

Mc: someone is in a bad mood

Lucifer: I wasn't talking to you, I was talking with Satan

Satan: (holding a cat) go fuck yourself Lucifer!

[intimidating-fettuccine]

BEN, changing the channels: I think I’ll just watch this baking show.

Y/N: But you know nothing about baking.

BEN: [Shrugs]

[After 24 hours of binge watching cooking shows]

BEN: I don’t care what Slender says; his fondant is dry and I can see the cracks forming already.

[timdrakesbussy]

Haley: *Pointing at Sebastian* We can't manipulate, Haley: *Pointing at Alex* mansplain, Haley: *Pointing at Sam* or malewife our way out of here. Abigail: *Wielding a sword* MANSLAUGHTER IT IS THEN

[overheardbyvarioustherapists]

Lucifer: Why aren’t the dishes in alphabetical order?! Satan: What does that even mean?

[aotearoa20]

Mae&Mags: We went through an entire character arc during the First Age

Mae&Mags: We became more evil if you’re curious

Eonwë: Dont worry, we're still doing the War of Wrath, there is time for a redemption arc!

Mae&Mags: (staring at the elves guarding the Silmaril) We're going to get worse on purpose

[luxthestrange]

WHB Incorrect quotes#53 Wraith vs Petty-

I PERSONALLY believe with satan if he and You/MC procreate... you're gonna have a daughter...he gives girl daddy vibes...plus that girl with both your anger issues+your sarcasm...UY-

Satan: Kids are Assholes Like My daughter is an asshole-*Sees his drinking buddies laugh*She is, We argue me and my daughter argue...She can't even talk-

Paimon*Snickers getting the popcorn ready*

Gehenna Demons*Gets Comfy wanting to hear their king Rant about his home life*

Satan: She knows a couple of words right? She puts a couple sentences together but it's like every time I tell her SOMETHING, she always gets something to say back- NO MATTER WHAT I SAY SHE ALWAYS GOTTA GIVE ME SOMETHING BACK and it makes me MAD-

Satan: We got into an argument over juice the other day...she came into the room she was like-

Scarlet(4)*Pitter patters to her daddy*Daddy juice!

Satan*Puts his newspaper down*No...You had enough juice, Go get some water

And she looked at she was...

Scarlet(4): DU meGama Tch-Nana wah wah ya ya JUICE*Mimicking Satan annoyingly with a Sassy look*

And i looked at her-

Satan:...WHO THE FUCK YOU THINK YOUR TALKING TO-SIT YOUR LIL ASS DOWN AND GET THE GODDAMN-

The Whole bar laughs even Zagan is laughing at the faces Satan is making about his daughter going up against the king of Gehenna

Satan: I was so mad..., I was mas because I knew she knew what she was trying to say, She just didn't know how to say it like in her mind...she was like "You albino midget b*tch, Get the juice punk ass daddy!"

Thats is honestly how I would see Scarlet-Untameble hair her dad's eyes your hair...er well Solomon's purple hair that got passed down to us/mc

[911-incorrect-quotes-dispatch]

Ravi: We have Pride month in June, is there another month for the other 6 deadly sins?

Hen: July would be wrath month.

Chim: Unbearable heat meets unending anger.

Buck: Lust month would clearly be October, hence all the sexy costumes.

Eddie: Greed month could be December, because of all the focus on buying presents.

Hen: I'm not sure what month would fit envy, sloth, and gluttony the best. We'll get back to you with our decision.

[bluetalenerd]

LOG MEMES (what did their lovers do for them pt. 1)

Landon King : Mia spoke for me

Glyndon King : Kill prepared me handmade lunch boxes

Nikolai Sokolov : Lotus Flower didn't have to do anything. i would just fall at his feet for free

Jeremy Volkov : Cecily signed up into Club of Dark fantasies for me-

Landon King : Hello, delusional. Ces joined for me *winks*

Cecily Knight *grabbing Jer's arm* : I only love you, Jeremy.

Landon King : Firsts are Firsts, Ces. And i was your first love

Jeremy Volkov *getting up to kill him* :

Creighton King *in depressed tone* : Annika shot me and put me in come

Landon King : which she missed, and you woke up

Eli King : Mrs. King stabbed me and forgot she ever stabbed me

Landon King : Barbie really missed too, huh? Both sister-in-laws have bad aim

[bribook]

Percy Jackson when Rick Riordan releases another book he has to be a part of:

[severe-kitty]

Niko: Bran is playing hard to get.

Niko: Little does he know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid off.

[a-local-idiots-shitpost]

Mc: I think I started a apocalypse

Satan: did you bring the dead back from the dead?

Mc: yeah, but at least they listen to me

Satan: so that's why a corpse was doing your laundry today

[bookishpedia]

Ava: I can fit the whole world in my hands.

Alex: That's not possible.

Ava: *cups Alex's face*

Alex: *blushes furiously*

Alex: Get off me, I have a reputation.

[avalordream]

How I think an instance of Cove climbing to MC's window went via text

Cove: MC

Cove: MC

Cove: MC

MC: GIVE ME A SEC COVE THERE'S SOMEONE OUTSIDE MY HOUSE

Cove: I know

Cove: That's me

MC: Cove

MC: It's like-

MC: 11 pm today-

MC: ITS NOT EVEN TODAY ANYMORE

MC: IT'S TOMORROW

MC: I ALMOST SCREAMED

Cove: please don't

MC: I WILL IF YOU DONT STOP STANDING THERE LIKE MICHAEL MYERS

Cove: I brought snacks

MC: get tf in here

[lighthousepigeons]

Landon: You look suspicious, want to tell me what you did?

Brandon: *avoiding eye contact*

Landon: Want to tell me who you did?

Brandon: *blushing and avoiding eye contact*

Landon: Was it that brute, Nikolai?

Brandon: Look at the time, I gotta go.

Landon: Wait, get back here you little shi-

[attractthecrows]

solavellan this solavellan that. my favorite way to interpret dalish heroes is as mirrors.

you're Mahariel. your life is over because of a mirror.

You are the mirror of Garahel. Tamlen is the blighted mirror of you. You, the hero, are a reflection of what has been and should never have been. The blood spilled and blackened over a millennium in the name of corrupted once-gods.

you're Merrill. your life is forever altered because of a mirror. you are a reflection of the pride and the folly of your Keeper, of what a Dalish mage should be, and should have been all along.

you are Lavellan. you are the Inquisitor, the lynchpin of fate, both a reflection and avenue of change - like an eluvian. you are the reflection of Mahariel. you are the reflection of your clan. you are the reflection of Ameridan. you are a reflection of Corypheus, caught in a cycle older than either of you. you are a reflection of the elvhen heart and soul. you are, unknowingly, the reflection of Fen'harel, and you will drag the world kicking and screaming into it's new fate and future.

you are, more than anything else, a mirror.