#it’s all just a confusing emotional soup

[slapshot1977]

i do not have many charitable thoughts about toews or the blackhawks organization BUT. tonight being his last game in chicago is making me emotional :/

i grew up watching the blackhawks and he’s been synonymous with them for as long as i can remember. i literally got into hockey bc of the hawks. i bonded with my dad and my brother bc of them. i have so many fond memories of the late 2000s/early 2010s bc of the hawks. i wish i could separate those feelings from the team but they are so intrinsically connected and i can’t. it’s an end of an era for sure

[baccan0pe]

.

[ellieslob]

★ellie got sick

+idea: ellie gets emotional when you take care of her

ways to help palestine !!!

you knew, deep down, under all the toughness and her act of being completely independent, and solitaire, ellie yearned for touch, but not just anybody's touch, your touch.

the first week after you guys got together you were both hesitant to touch each other, to be near one another, too nervous and definitely too worried of messing up, ruining everything and ending up alone again, so for the first weeks, you guys practically were just friends that called each other “babe” and “honey”.

that was until ellie got sick, it was nothing to really worry about, nothing but a cold, “it didn't matter” as she said, but at the same time, she had spent all of her weekend inside her bed, texting you about how her tummy hurt, her head hurt, her pinky toe hurt, your girlfriend switched from being the strongest and toughest woman you ever met to such being a pretty cry baby. you two were on your nightly call, when she heard the ring bell “oh no, wait babe, god, how do i get up” you heard her covers moving as she growled and whined.

“don't worry honey, i'll get the door” she looked at her phone confused, you hung up and left her even more confused, were you high? or…

the knocking stopped an the door opened showing that it was you at her room, with a soft smile and a little basket in your hands “hi baby. okay, okay, so i brought you a soft blanket, some chocolate, and yes, the milky one, not dark. i bought soda but i bringed tea, because you need to stay hydrated” your hands pushed her back to the bed, tugging her with the little blanket, and then checking her temperature by softly pressing your foreheads “oh and i made you chicken soup, i know you don't loove vegetables, but baby you-

you stopped yourself completely, her face was now drowning in tears, her face all covered in blush and her hands were grabbing her new soft blanket with a very tight grip “ellie, w-what's wrong?”

she got up from the bed, still her movements were slow and silly, but she managed to get to you, your worried look, the little basket, the homemade tea and soup, the little and soft voice you used just to talk to her. she knew it.

she almost tackled you into a hug, starting to cry even harder, her deep voice turning into whines, her sobs were loud and strong that they moved her hole body, she was clinging onto your shirt, hiding her face in your chest, you didn't know what to do, you had yourgirlfriend weeping desperately in your arms and she didn't answer your questions or stop shivering. you caressed her cheek, trying to wipe her tears a little “ellie?”

“thank you, i… i was so exhausted, i am really, but even with all my whining and complaining, god it must have been so boring to hear me complain about everything but still you.. you”

“i love you ellie, i love your face, your little freckles, your voice, your bad jokes, your complains, i love them because i love you, way too much, i’d say, you should be scared, like seriously, you should call the police” you started attacking her with little kisses all around her face.

“stop” she laughed like a kid, making you chuckle a little, her tears finally stopped, leaving her eyes shiny and loving “and you say my jokes are bad” she holds your waist, pulling you closer to her.

“well i guess that's why we are together honey, you'll have to endure”

“i love you”

“i love you more” and as cheesy as it sounded, your voice, your words and your kisses were all that ellie needed to get better.

🥣masterlist!

🫐nat: im back😭 im so sorry for all the time that has passed, this is not my best work but i wanted to make a little something to officially come back, love yaaall so so much

[yggdrasilhypno]

Some hypnosis fun facts!

1. Did you know that trance is easy to obtain and to feel within your body and mind?

2. Did you know that all it takes to brainwash someone is only a few minutes of their attention?

3. Did you know that certain words can subconsciously create certain emotions and feelings in people?

4. Did you know that trance is simple and effortless to fall into?

5. Did you know that my words were this pretty and enchanting to read?

6. Did you know that your eyes can become locked into place so easily and effortlessly?

7. Did you know that your breathing slows almost automatically when you’re focused on something?

8. Did you know that when words start mixing into pretty patterns like this, your mind begins to blur them together into a nice, dazed soup of speech?

9. Did you know that your subconscious picks up and accepts brainwashing without even trying to?

10. Did you know that my words were this powerful?

11. Did you know that you were being counted down into a deep trance?

12. Did you know that you’ve been trapped in my pretty words?

13. Did you know that your mind’s quieted to a crawl?

14. Did you know that the more you listen and focus on my pretty words, the deeper you go?

15. Did you know that you’ve been in a deep trance this entire time?

17. Did you know that trance can be so confusing and yet so comforting and relaxing?

19. Did you know that you’d be this transfixed on what I have to say?

24. Did you know that you’ve been falling deeper and deeper without even realizing it?

27. Did you know that I’ve been skipping numbers without your knowledge?

34. Did you know that your mind’s so empty now that every word I say is just another dosage of deep and dreamy ditziness?

36. Did you know that you’ve been brainwashed so easily and so effortlessly by me?

39. Did you know that would feel this good?

40. Did you know that you’d forget this ever happened right after you hit the number 50?

44. Did you know that you’d wake up on 50, like nothing happened?

47. Did you know that you’d feel so refreshed and happy on 50?

48. Did you know that you’d be nice and brainwashed on 50?

49. Did you know that you’d read this again after you wake up?

50. And finally, did you know that trance is super easy to wake up from?

Isn’t trance the best?

[cheesecakethots]

Part 2 to this.

He had never been so caring for another, the guard noted. Lord Scaramouche was not the caring type, after all.

Despite that, the man had watched the lord express actual worry for you, the one huddled away in his tent as he barked orders at soldiers to find medicine, make warm soup, and heat up water. One of them had had his fingers broken for making the food too cold for the harbingers liking.

On the very few occasions the guard was permitted inside the tent, he had caught glimpses of the lord knelt beside your feverish figure in bed, the back of his hand softly resting on your forehead. If they had been any longer in finding you…

The few medics in camp were situated nearby, with any and all injuries not held by you being mostly ignored for the time being. You had barely been conscious for the past few days, slipping in and out, with some mumbled and confusing phrases leaving chapped lips.

The guard is brought out of his memories when Lord Scaramouche passes him, dramatically parting the tent covering and entering with a few quick strides. He immediately makes a beeline for your cold, limp body tucked away in bed.

Scaramouche places a hand to your cheek. His frown deepens, and you groan, glazed over eyes opening only a fraction.

“M…Mother?”

A sigh escapes him. His soulmate really is pitiful… and weak.

“… You’re safe now,” he mutters, surprised for a moment at the tinge of emotion in his own voice.

“Do… I have to help c…cook dinner?”

“No. You’ll never be doing that again.”

“Oh… okay…” A yawn leaves your throat.

“Go to sleep.”

“Can we have… chocolate later? I bought some… to share,” you murmur, trailing off until your breathing becomes light, and your eyes fully close.

The lord sighs. A shiver wracks through your body, despite the multiple animal hides you have on. He’s certain that his men have destroyed the surrounding ecosystem just to keep you warm, but, oh well.

He stands, hesitantly turning away from you. You need more blankets, maybe some more soup, anything to keep the fever from taking you away from-

Oh. His eyes widen, and he glances back to you, and then at the shaking hand pulling on his fingers.

“Don’t… leave me…”

You’re still asleep. It’s not as though you’re conscious and would know if he left, is it? It’s not as though your plea is anything more than some deluded fairytale in your mind, is it?

“I won’t.”

Curses.

Curse him, and curse you for awakening something he didn’t think he had, something in his chest that for centuries he was sure was simply an empty void of nothing.

He wants to scoff and leave you here, to tell you that he has no need for someone as weak as you in his life. He wishes he had left you tied to that tree and just kept moving, that he had never felt the touch of your skin against his own. That he had felt absolutely nothing, that he hadn’t felt a stab of fear for the first time in a long time when carrying your freezing cold body back to camp. It would’ve saved him a lot of trouble.

He doesn’t let go of your hand for a long, long while.

The next morning he leaves you alone for a short time, an hour at most. He regrets it when he comes back to you standing on two wobbly knees, the parts that make him up jolting at the sight.

“What are you doing?!”

You flinch, yelping when you abruptly turn to him and lose your balance. Hands, ones that send a feeling of static and electricity straight to your very core, are soon grasping onto you, holding you up before you can hit the ground.

“Are you daft?” The man spits out, visibly aggravated.

“Wh-What? What?”

“Get back in bed. I won’t ask you again.”

You don’t move, the sensation that comes with his touch only growing the longer the two of you stand.

“You’re… you’re…?” You whisper, eyes widening.

He pauses, the irritation in his expression dropping a little. After a beat, his lips part.

“… Yes.”

“We were in the woods, right? My village, they…”

Any softness on his face is wiped away the moment you mention your old home, and the people that resided in it. No longer waiting, he lightly pushes you back, leading you into the makeshift bed below. A blanket is soon wrapped around your quivering shoulders.

“Eat this,” he orders, pulling something out of his pocket and holding it close to your lips.

Chocolate.

“I’m not-“

“Eat.”

You tentatively take it from him, and the atmosphere grows awkward, at least for you, while he watches you chew on the rest of it.

“Thank you, it was delicious,” you tell him, truthfully. You haven’t had chocolate in a long time, as it was simply too expensive for your family to afford. Your mouth curves downwards into a frown.

“Rest.”

You don’t. You’re not sure if you can.

“My family, they let them take me. They didn’t… they didn’t stop them. They must…” A gasp is torn from you, and you meet his eyes once more. “How long has it been?”

“… Three days.”

You begin rise to your shaky feet, “I-I must go back, they’ll think that I’m-!”

He pushes you back down effortlessly.

“Are you a fucking fool?”

You can’t help but flinch at the absolute venom in his tone, but he isn’t done yet, towering over you.

“What do you think will happen if you go back, hm? That they’ll accept you with open arms, or they’ll send you right back to where I found you? Or, better yet, maybe they’ll set you alight there and then, rather than troubling themselves in having you freeze to death, they’ll instead watch you burn. Would you like to test if your family would spare you from that? Hm?”

You have never felt this small in your entire life.

“I-“

“Enough.” It appears the question was rhetorical, and your mouth closes, quickly feeling very dry.

His chest shudders with each deep breath he draws in, and he closes his eyes shut for a moment, seemingly trying to calm himself.

“Sleep. We have a long journey ahead of us. Don’t ask me anymore stupid questions,” he turns on his heel, most likely deciding that he has something better to do. However, before he fully departs, he pauses at the entrance to the tent, still not looking back at you.

“You deserve better than that village, than that family who threw you out as though you were nothing to them. Know that I do not plan on doing the same, and that you… aren’t nothing to me.”

The intimidation you feel from him dimishes when you catch sight of the pinkish tinge to the tips of his ears. He doesn’t wait for your response, swiftly departing. You miss the few words of parting he gives you, as you tuck yourself into bed.

“Besides, it’s not as though you have anything to go back to, anymore.”

[moonie-moon-o7]

Big Mom Pirates Incorrect Quotes

Imagine being so unpredictable and random that not even Katakuri's observation haki works on you 💀

Katakuri: Stop thinking whatever you're thinking. You: Huh? Katakuri: You always make that face when you're about to say something stupid just to piss me off. So cut it out- You: I love you. Katakuri: You: You: Also, cereal qualifies as a soup. Katakuri: I KNEW IT!!

You: It's not like I try to blow things up, exactly. It just sort of happens. You've got to admit though, fire is fascinating.

You: I hate you with every inch of my body! Katakuri: That’s not a lot of inches.

Big Mom: That’s the key slice of truth we need to complete the entire truth pie. You: Ooh, can we get some actual pie? Big Mom: I like the way you think.

Brûlée: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health, so you shouldn't do it. You: I know, that's why I bottle up all my emotions, both positive and negative, so it cancels out. Brûlée: Th-that's not how that works-

Pudding: How the hell are you still alive? You: Honestly, I’m just as confused as you are.

Katakuri: Would it be discrimination to only hire employees at my doughnut shop who have the same name? You: Legally, I don't believe that breaches any discrimination laws. Morally though... I don't know. Katakuri: I believe god is on my side when it comes to Duncans' Doughnuts.

You: Can I ask a dumb question? Katakuri: Better than anyone I know.

Pudding: My expectations are low, but they can always go lower.

You: What’s up? I’m back. Katakuri: I literally saw you die. You died. You were dead You: Death is a social construct.

You: Why don't humans have a specific noise that means "there are bees here, let's leave immediately." Why are elephants more advanced than us. Perospero: We do have a specific noise for it. It sounds like this: Perospero: "There are bees here, let's leave immediately."

You: How many vampires do you think have been hit by a car backing up in a parking lot because the driver couldn’t see their reflection? Big Mom: I’ve never considered it but you’re really shining light on what’s probably a very serious issue.

[dandylovesturtles]

havin' all these Splinter and Leo thoughts. augh.

this is partly the fault of @/turtleblogatlast's post about Leo just wanting to make Splinter proud.

post-movie

...

Seven days post-invasion, and Leo is feeling (relatively) pretty good. Sure, he's still on a truly ridiculous amount of painkillers and he can't walk two steps without collapsing, but he's able to stay awake and talk to his family and considering where he thought he would be right about now, well... that's everything.

So yeah, he's feeling pretty good. He just finished his lunch of soup and a protein shake, warm and a little drowsy while he listens to April talk about some of the more ridiculous conspiracy theories that have started spreading on the surface. Donnie's tinkering with one of his smaller inventions while he listens, Mikey is nestled in Raph's lap, and everything is calm and cozy in their makeshift medbay.

And then his dad walks in and says, "I would like to talk to Blue, please. Alone."

And suddenly Leo doesn't feel so good anymore.

"Aha, wait," he says quickly, reaching out and grabbing April's sleeve just before she rises from her chair. "Whatever it is, you can say it in front of everyone, right?"

Splinter shakes his head. "This is a conversation I think it is best we have in private." He makes a shooing motion at the others, and April pulls her sleeve from Leo's fingers with a helpless shrug.

"See ya in a few, Leo," she says, then walks out. The others look from Splinter, to him, then back to Splinter, and one by one they each get up and shuffle out, too, with their own hasty farewells.

Traitors, every single one of them.

The door closes, and Leo finds himself alone with Splinter for the first time since coming back from Staten Island. Or at least, the first time he can remember. He was pretty out of it the first few days; most of what he remembers is muddled and confused. And embarrassing. He cried a lot more than he'd care to admit.

Splinter hops into chair April was sitting in and pulls it closer; he has to stay standing to be anywhere near eye level with Leo. He wishes he could read Splinter's face, but his expression is giving nothing away. Sometimes it's easy to forget he spent a not-insignificant part of his life as an actor, until something like this happens.

Leo decides to speak before he can. Head him off at the pass, or something.

"If you're going to yell at me, just remember my eardrums are already damaged."

Which is true - turns out being 1, too close to an exploding alien spaceship and 2, getting punched in the head repeatedly by an alien very mad about said exploding spaceship is bad for the ears, even when you don't have outer ears like a human. So super loud noises are a bad idea right now, and thus Leo cannot be yelled at. Flawless logic; maybe he can keep using that every time he gets in trouble.

For the first time, his dad's expression shifts, just a little. A deeper frown, a heavier set to his brow.

"You think I came in here to yell at you?"

Leo feels his stomach twist. Does he have to spell it out? "I mean, didn't you? That's usually what kicking everyone else out is leading up to."

"I see..." Splinter is still unreadable, looking a little too intensely at Leo. "And what do you think I want to yell at you about?"

He really does want it spelled out. Leo suddenly realizes that there won't be any yelling because this is his punishment: to admit everything he's done, to speak all his sins for his dad's ears. Lay it all out in his own tongue and show that he understands, really and truly, the depths of his screwups.

Oh, he understands. He understands it so well he may choke on the words.

"...For losing the key," he says finally, and it stings on its way out. He hasn't talked about it since it happened; every time he tries to say anything to the others, they shush him, saying, "It's okay, Leo, everything is fine now."

It's not okay, and everything isn't fine, and this is when he finally hears about it.

Finally, an identifiable emotion on Splinter's face: horror, dawning clear and present. And Leo doesn't understand that, because doesn't Splinter know he lost the key? He was there for that conversation, wasn't he? Leo's memories of that day have grown a little hazy between the drugs and the recovery and the fact that thinking about it for too long makes him go fuzzy around the edges, but he's pretty sure he remembers Splinter being there. He flicked popcorn at Leo's head. He probably should have done more than that; maybe then Leo wouldn't have made such a mess of things.

Splinter doesn't say anything right away, just stares at Leo with that horrified expression, and the silence is so scary that Leo starts filling it without even thinking.

"I was kidding about the whole... not yelling at me thing. I know I deserve it. I mean, I was fooling around, doing what you and Raph told me not to do, and I doomed the whole world doing it! Some leader I am, right? And I know I'm not exactly your favorite son to begin with, and that's fair, because I keep letting you down, but this is definitely my worst screwup to date, and you yell at me when I don't close the fridge door all the way or throw balls around the TV room so why wouldn't you yell at me for destroying the planet, right...?"

His voice peters out at the end, too hoarse to continue. That's the most words he's strung together over the last week, and for the first time he's glad for his injuries, for stopping him from spewing any more embarrassing word vomit just to fill the air.

Splinter is still looking at him with that same horrified expression. If anything, he just looks more upset, which means that Leo at least accomplished his goal.

Leo's waiting for the yelling to start, but when Splinter finally says something, it's, "You think I have a favorite son?" throwing Leo for a loop once again.

"Uh, yeah?" he says, because that's all there is to say. He's always assumed it's Donnie - the "funny one", the one who fixes Splinter's TV when it's broken, and the only one of them likely to get a real job and move out of the house. But even if it's not Donnie, it's gotta be Mikey, or Raph. His brothers are amazing and talented, and all Leo has ever been good at is winning the Lair Games.

Splinter closes his eyes a moment, and when he opens them his face moves back to a more neutral expression. "I do not have a favorite son," he says, firm and serious. "I love all of you just the same."

Leo thinks that can't be true - if it is, he feels bad for the other guys. But he doesn't think he can just say that, so he says, "Yeah, Dad, of course," instead.

Splinter looks a bit crestfallen. "You don't believe me?" he asks, and shoot. Leo has no idea how to respond to that.

"...I know you love us," is what he says. And that's true, it is! He just doesn't know how his dad could like him as much as the others.

Splinter's expression turns sad. He reaches out and lays a furry hand on Leo's arm, careful of his bandages and all the many wires he's hooked to. "You think you doomed the world?"

"I lost the key," Leo repeats. "It was all my fault. It's why I had to..." His voice fumbles over the words, and he revises. "It's why it had to be me."

Splinter's mouth twists. He climbs out of the chair and onto the mattress, careful not to jostle Leo as he settles down on his knees.

"Blue," he says softly, gently palming Leo's face this time. "None of this was your fault."

Leo's stomach twists again. He thought he was being punished, but somehow this is worse.

"Yes it was," he argues. "I lost the key," for the third time, "and... and I ignored the order to retreat, and got Raph captured, and and and, I ignored the guys and tried to force our way into Metro Tower, and it was me who told Donnie to try to fly that stupid ship, and because of me Mikey had to-"

"Leonardo," says Splinter, sharp, and Leo goes silent. His dad looks devastated, but he keeps his hand on Leo's cheek, brushing with his thumb, and for the first time Leo realizes his skin is wet. Splinter sighs heavily, his entire frame seeming to droop with the weight of it.

"Leonardo," he repeats, softly this time. "You did not doom the world."

"But-"

A furry finger on his lip quiets him.

"You did not doom the world," Splinter repeats, once again firm and serious. "You did not take the theft of the key seriously, because you did not know what it was, the threat it represented. But it was the Foot Clan who chose to use that key, fully knowing what evil it would unleash. That is not on you, my son. The responsibility falls squarely on them."

Leo doesn't know how much he can believe that - isn't it their job to stop the Foot Clan? But Splinter looks so sure as he says it, and his hand is still tender on Leo's cheek, and for the first time a little bit of doubt seeps into Leo's heart, telling him that maybe, just maybe, this wasn't all his fault after all.

But still...

"Even if that's true," he says, with heavy emphasis on the if, "everything I did after that-"

"You are young," his dad interrupts. "You are inexperienced. You are learning. And the amount of growth you showed us all, even over just that one day... You shined as brightly as I know you can."

Again, Leo's stomach does a twist - but it's a happier one, this time. Splinter's voice is sincere, leaving no room for doubt, and Leo can almost, almost believe that this is true, that his dad has believed in him from the very beginning. Has seen something in him, whatever it was that led him to make Leo the leader, that lead to him putting trust in Leo.

He just wishes he felt like he'd done more to earn it.

"You did not doom the world," says his dad again. "You saved it. But, it never should have been like that to begin with. You should never have been facing down such a fierce foe so young, especially as alone as you boys were. And you-"

His voice becomes choked up, and Leo's heart lurches.

"You... sacrificed yourself to save us all. I... I am your father, and I... could not protect you."

He's crying. His dad is crying, and Leo feels panic, reaching out to try and stop this.

"Dad-"

"No." Splinter holds up a hand, giving his head a hard shake. "All I ever wanted for you boys was to save you from the sacrifices asked of our family. And yet I could not - and for that, you paid dearly. You almost paid the ultimate price, and we almost lost you forever."

A thick knot forms in Leo's throat, and he can barely get out, "I'm okay, Dad, I'm here."

"Yes you are." Splinter squeezes his shoulder desperately. "You are here. You are safe. But that doesn't change that it should not have been you to begin with."

Leo watches in dawning horror as Splinter steps back, then kneels over on the mattress.

"This is why I came in here, Blue. Not to yell at you. To apologize."

He presses his forehead against the sheets.

"I am so sorry that I could not protect you."

He's crying. So is Leo, openly now. He reaches out for his dad, fumbling for his shoulders and urging him to straighten up.

"No, Dad... This wasn't your fault!"

"But-"

"No! It was just... it was just a really, really shitty thing that happened, okay? It was the Foot Clan, and the Krang, but it wasn't- it wasn't..."

Splinter raises his face and looks at him, and suddenly the words he's been trying to get Leo to believe for the last several minutes barrel into him and Leo crumbles.

"...I didn't have to do it," he says.

"No." Splinter gets up, coming closer. "You had nothing to atone for. You did it because you are brave, and you are kind, but this was never yours to fix."

Leo sucks in one harsh breath, then another, and then he's sobbing harder than he ever has in his life, and his dad hugs him tight, his arms warm and his fur soft where Leo buries his face in his shoulder.

All the feelings he's pushed aside - the ones he didn't think he had the right to feel, because he'd had to do it, he had to make up for his mistakes - bubble over, gripping him with grief and despair but also relief, that he's still here to cry and be hugged by his dad.

"I was so scared."

"I know."

"I thought I wouldn't see you guys again."

"I know. We thought we had lost you, too."

"I just... I didn't know what else to do... I couldn't let him... I couldn't..."

"Shhh, it's alright. It's over now. We're all safe."

Leo hugs his dad back, as tightly as he can with his injuries, and sobs and sobs until he's all out of tears. And all along, his dad tells him he is safe, he is good, and he is loved.

Later, Leo feels even better than he had before.

[twstfanblog]

Savanaclaw Random Headcanons

Ruggie's grandma actually warned him to not get involved with Leona before he went to NRC. Dealing with royals as a poor folk rarely ends well. He was grounded when he came back on winter break to tell her he was basically his errand boy.

Jack is confused constantly as an upperclassmen. Other first years ask him questions and he just goes 'How would I know that?'

Now he's known as a mean senpai to a few first years.

Ruggie actually made an insane amount of money in his first year by doing cooking challenges. People would bring him things they think couldnt possibly be made into a meal. And Ruggie would prove them wrong and get a free meal and 50 madol.

Leona tried to trip him up by just giving him a knife to cook.

Ruggie just sold the knife and bought some canned soup.

Jack actually ties down his ears sometimes. Just so his emotions aren't being on display 24/7. His tail is a lost cause.

Leona can and will fall asleep in under a minute. Its not a heavy sleep and he can still follow conversations. He does it during dorm meetings mostly.

If everyone thinks he's trying to sleep, the other savanaclaw memebers won't get into so many shouting matches.

Jack is the only one who can handle smelling salt in close range. Never use them on him. But he can at least hold them.

Ruggie has bitten into a rock before and left marks.

Leona sleeps with his hair in a loose bun to act as a pillow.

After his overblot, Leona makes it a habit to have more dorm centered activities to show he cares.

The dorm favorite is the pool party/ BBQs

Ruggie can tell the price of anything you bring him. Only with an error of a penny or two off normally.

Jack has used Epel as a weight before and didnt have the heart to tell him he weighed next to nothing.

It's a dorm rule to eat at least one piece of fruit a day. (To avoid scurvy since all of them would rather just eat meat all the time)

Leona has found Ruggie passed put more than once. He always takes him back to the dorm, and Ruggie will wake up in Leona's room, thinking he fell asleep cleaning his room.

Leona makes a just barely there effort to be nice to Jack since he looks up to him so much.

It's the most basic thing, but it's enough to turn heads of people who know Leona.

[drac-kool-aid]

I'm thinking today about the running pattern of sleep deprivation and exhaustion in Dracula, and like how it truly affects the story and the character beats if you really think about it.

Like, okay. First, we have Jonathan, whose sleep deprivation was purposeful, a way to slowly eat away at his sanity by Dracula. Mina, who has to stay awake to protect Lucy from sleep walking, who spends her days in a mess of anxiety and stress, exhausting herself further. Lucy sleeps and sleeps, and yet becomes even more exhausted. The one thing that can give her relief is also when she's most in danger. Jack, dealing with his emotions by working to exhaustion and then experiencing insomnia, and rightly being cautious about taking choral because it was addictive, so working more.

Soon, there will be more sleepless vigils, more hurried traveling (where sleep is hard to get), more high emotions causing poor sleep, and they all will fear the night for the dangers it brings.

All these characters are, to their core, DEEPLY exhausted. And the problem with exhaustion like that? One good sleep doesn't repair you. It takes weeks of good rest to make up for the sleep debt some of these people have. Even Jonathan and Lucy's bedrests are exactly restful. Sure, they are probably sleeping most of the time, but judging by the descriptions of their conditions, they are tired to the bone and greatly weakened any time they are awake.

And like, it messes with you just as much as Dracula. I'm not kidding when I say time feels different. You feel like it's a soup around you. Your emotions are harder to control. I mean, sure, you get angry easier, but from personal experience, you usually just get more and more overwhelmed. And, in a true "the straw that breaks the camels back" situation, you usually end up breaking down about some small, inconsequential thing and end up sobbing. You're easily confused, easily lost, and feel like you're drifting away.

Like, I want to cry just thinking about it. It's just an extra, subtle added layer of horror.

[m1d-45]

i’ve reread duality of man so many times, it’s completely captured my brain and i’m literally obsessed with it….. i’m going insane (/pos) imagining how it would feel for childe to learn that he was wrong, he was wrong and if it weren’t for foul legacy, his god would be dead at his hands!! how horrible it would be to learn that the creator trusts foul legacy over him because of his own actions!! FUCK!!!

inversion of fate

a/n: you are so right. target audience. anon is referencing this post.

word count: 1.8k

-> warnings: childe, major spoilers for his lore, imposter au things, it/its pronouns for foul legacy because it’s childe’s perspective

-> gn reader (you/yours)

taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yum1x || @esthelily

< masterlist >

childe doesn’t really see foul legacy as much more than an extension of himself, an extra tool he utilizes in the heat of battle, so to be shown that this ‘tool’ was correct? that his bloodlust had blinded him to the one thing that matters??? OUGH

foul legacy’s emotions sort of bleed into his due to the nature of their bond, so he can feel the genuine love that legacy feels for you and it drives him mad. he can tell it’s being genuine, that the claws swiping a strand of hair from your face are only moved by care, and it’s so irritating to him. he has to just sit there and simmer in the adoration from legacy, and he can’t do anything while you’re being so lovingly cared for by a creature of the abyss, only sit in a body he no longer has control over.

when foul legacy finally urges you to stand, he thinks it’s over. he tracks your direction and hears through abyssal ears, following your movement. he’s ready to go the moment that legacy gives up control.

maybe that’s why the moment never comes.

foul legacy closes its eye, spinning quickly to a seemingly random direction. it navigates solely by its own invisible senses, one’s childe’s brain isn’t wired to receive and decode, and he’s stunned into silence.

why is it going through so much trouble to protect you? surely it knows that even if childe isn’t the one, you’ll be caught eventually, right? it has to know that it can’t control his body forever (can it?) and that eventually he’ll get his revenge. it has to.

childe tries to keep himself oriented as best he can, if only to point others in the right direction, but legacy kept stopping to spin and confuse him. it only opened its eye once the sounds of the harbor reached its ears, and even then, childe found himself near the southern end of the harbor, near where the path split to lead up to the golden house.

he’d found you somewhere near luhua pool. he couldn’t tell whether to be impressed or annoyed that legacy managed to get him here so quickly.

standing on shaking legs, childe stumbled into the harbor. maybe it would be wise to get an agent to walk with him: he was always exhausted after a transformation, and this one was more mentally taxing than most.

in the back of his mind, he swears he can hear a satisfied rumble from the devouring deep.

it was rare that childe received a letter.

folders were common, crossing his desk to report on missions he didn’t order and announce things he didn’t ask about. orders themselves were common enough, ‘letters’ of notice in neat packages, a small box with a map and a card denoting what was to be done. he was familiar with both, as all harbingers were, but an actual letter?

childe spotted the bright blue paper from the moment he stepped into his office, slowly closing the door behind him. as he rounded his desk, he saw the bright gold wax seal shimmered under the light, taunting him from the center of his desk. the room was eerily quiet, the creak from his chair bouncing off the walls and back at him. as he picked up the envelope, the textured paper sparking a memory, the seal suddenly felt a lot more daunting.

the seal of the fatui was also a familiar thing. it was stamped on papers and issued on uniforms, badges and reports embossed with the dark four-pointed star. he had a stamp of it himself, in one of his drawers, though he’d admittedly swapped the usual black ink for a blood red. all the harbingers tended to put their own spin onto their paperwork, usually for ease of filing or to show off. signora had the corners of the seal spiked into flames, licking across orange ink. dottore had his in a variety of shades of blue, wire forming the outer ring.

pantalone had the circles in the star changed to mora.

he flipped it over just to be sure, reading the shining golden scrawl, but the writing in the corner confirmed it was from pantalone, the characteristic cursive ‘regrator’ justifying the weight of the paper. he doubted there was much more than a single page inside; pantalone was always rather concise, even if a touch flowery in the way he did it.

with a sigh, childe turned the envelope back over and fit a nail under the wax, neatly separating it from the textured paper. he pulled the letter out and turned it to the side: only one page, though it felt like three.

a laugh slipped from him. it felt forced. in the back of his mind, foul legacy chittered.

‘shut up,’ he muttered, tossing the empty envelope on his desk.

‘you will not wish for my silence much longer.’

childe paused, a finger under the flap of the folded paper. ‘what does that mean?’

‘what do you think it does?’

he shook off the cryptic response—though it’s been months since he ran into you, it’s been in a mood ever since—and unfolded the letter, beginning to read.

he almost wished he didn’t.

there’s only two paragraphs on the page—succinct as always, he thought numbly—but the paper weighed as much as a mountain in his hands.

it was a letter updating him on the hunt for the imposter. a common source of news for him, who couldn’t personally take part in it due to his foul legacy, but this…

no matter how many times he rereads the cursive scrawl, it refuses to register. the expensive paper wrinkles around where his thumb is pressing into it, his grip tightening with every passing moment in an attempt to combat the shake beginning to set in. the same words glare at him, unchanging, shimmering off the page like an oasis of poison.

he feels legacy crawl out of the cave in his head that it has sealed itself in, finally coming forward into the light of reality that childe is washed in. the abyss stares, inspecting the harsh gleam of truth, the shine that pierces into childe’s eyes and makes them water, the one that doesn’t go away even if he closes them. legacy chitters, almost like a laugh, and the paper finally falls from childe’s hands.

‘we were wrong,’ the paper says.

you were wrong, his mind repeats.

legacy reads the paper, cooing sadly at the news that you’ve been missing ever since zhongli cornered you. you’d slipped away in his shock, and he could feel the way it wanted to chase after you. the barrier between their minds was always rather thin, and he can feel it press against it, the sadness and concern bleeding into him.

legacy pawed at his mind, urging him to let it take over and find you, and childe couldn’t even find humor in the fact that a creature of the abyss was whining at him.

it was his fault. his fault, his, if he had just listened to legacy and to the call in his own heart, if he had stopped and thought like he was told, if he had recognized the fact that legacy would never turn down a fight-

something like pride washed into his mind from legacy but it didn’t register, the overwhelming realization that he’d tried to kill his god driving all thoughts from his mind.

and he would have succeeded were if not for the abyss.

the abyss itself, the liquid poison that clung to his skin and made him dream of stars fallen from the sky, the small part of it that he had to permanently take on to survive, that had been more right than his own mind. the very place known for being bloodthirsty and ruthless, that never turned down a fight and was the first to draw blood, had been kind to you. he should have noticed.

he was wrong. how could he be?

his foul legacy chittered, an equal mix of taunting him and asking to find you.

‘give up,’ it cooed, a bitter edge of false affection around its words. ‘you’ve already done enough.’

he hated that it was right.

he hated that were it not for legacy he would have hurt you further. he hated that he had the gall to try and taunt you, you, the one he’d sworn to devote his life to after he escaped the abyss. you who gave him a form strong enough to handle the devouring deep, you who gave him the strength to stand up and keep on, and he repaid you by hunting you down, claws bared.

and he hated that he would never be able to find you on his own.

‘let me find my god.’

‘my god,’ he weakly replied, but bile quickly rose in his throat. were you? did he even have the privilege of calling himself your follower if the only words he spoke to you were threats? could he call himself faithful when he pressed on after the abyss itself cried for mercy?

‘are you the one they held close?’

childe was going to be sick.

he wasn’t, he wasn’t, he was so awful that you had to turn to the abyss for comfort, his hands were so stained that even the highest of the high recoiled, weapon drawn. you, his light, the one thing that he could always rely on, the sole constant in his life, and he turned his back on you when you needed it most. he had willingly thrown it all away, blindly following a fake that took advantage of his faith. even when all the signs asked him to stop—to think—he had pressed onward, so blinded that a creature of sea and stars could see what he could not.

‘let me find them.’

he stared at his desk, at the work he still had to do, at the letter proclaiming his failure, at the wide window to his left that spanned nearly the entire wall, more than large enough for even his foul legacy, and made a decision.

ajax gave up his body, bitter in the knowledge that the only time he could only see you would be through another’s eyes, and sick in the understanding that it was all his fault.

[stuckasmain]

Hal’s deactivation is hard hitting across both the movie and the book. It’s been dissected a million times and likely more in the future. Most recently in the way of Hal having little agency…he has no arms to ward off his attacker or means of defense (but I’d argue killing Frank and the others was his defense, especially in the movie when his reasoning is more ambiguous). I do love the idea this is following and hope to see more of it in the future, however the way I’m approaching it is with a more romantic lense.

The entire lobotomy sequence is heart wrenching and almost worse in the novel purely because we get to see Dave’s thoughts on it. Not only do we hear Hal’s frightened pleas for his life but we get the ‘attacker’ perspective and it’s… an act of mercy.

While there is the themes of survival and violence this is approached with a softer touch. It’s much more that he is putting Hal out of his misery. Ending his suffering. Not putting him down like an animal but rather the harsh decision faced when one has an ill/dying lover.

“The only answer was to cut out the higher centers of this sick but brilliant brain, and to leave the purely automatic regulating systems in operation” 155

After the job is done Dave forgives Hal incredibly quickly once all of the facts are in. He can quickly pull together the mental break that must’ve happened and recognizes that Hal had the very human ‘fight or flight’ response to what he had been through. He had always been treated like a sixth crew member, respected and talked to like anyone else but it is only “post Mortem” that Dave recognizes how human Hal was and that true emotion might be more than theorizing.

“And yet, in one very real sense, he was not alone. Before he could be safe, be must be lonelier still.” 153

The fact that Dave genuinely sees Hal as his last true connection. Even after the murders. How he fights and forgives and comes up with excuses to not have to go through with the enviable because then will he be truly alone… but he also knows logically- Hal isn’t right and can’t be left active. Despite his feelings safety and protocol come first.

Hal is human in Dave’s eyes and it makes things all the more tragic, it’s what turns shutting off functions into lobotomy, into murder. He thinks he won’t feel pain, not because he’s machine but because there’s no sense in the human cortex. So human that his “true” voice is unrecognizable and horrifying.

“Bowman could bare no more. He jerked out the last unit, and Hal was silent forever.” 157

It’s not rage which he makes the final blow, it’s sorrow. It’s pulling the plug.

Some of Hal’s lines in the book particularly, as we get more insight into him as well and some of his pleading. His honest to god confusion and panic because he’s so young and has no idea of sleep and …

“I don’t understand why you’re doing this to me. . . You are destroying my mind. . . Don’t you understand? I will become childish. . . I will be nothing. . .” 156

I don’t know, I’m becoming borderline incoherent but there’s something here that’s so tender and sorrowful that I have to address it. I’m a sucker for the violence = intimacy metaphor just as anyone but the unwitting murderer is also an angle I have to adore.

Maybe in another life Hal got to be a little gay Victorian with someone to hold his hand on his sick bed rather than be murdered. I just think he deserves better; they both do.

Computer death sad -> he should be fed soup

This is when you know you should go to bed.

[midgardian-witch]

From the prompt list: “Because every time I see you, all I can think about is kissing you and I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about that.” with Steven Grant please.

Since I already did this prompt with Jake I decided to approach this a little differently. And it turned out much longer than I had planned. I still hope you'll like it, anon 💙

Stupid Sexy Steven

tags: friends to lovers | kissing | cursing | Steven being effortlessly adorable and sexy | gn!reader

ships: Steven Grant/Reader

AO3

Edit: added AO3 link

“Because every time I see you, all I can think about is kissing you and I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about that.”

You've been avoiding Steven. It's not the bravest thing to do and you're not exactly proud of it but you don't know what else to do. 

You need the space to figure out how to deal with your emotions. It's not an everyday thing you realize you're in love with your best friend. So avoiding it is. 

You know you'll have to say something at some point, you just didn't know how to say it. It's like your brain just shuts off when you look at him nowadays. He's just so genuinely kind and loving, and that goofy little grin he makes when he gets excited, and the way his brows furrow when he focuses on something-

Focus. Don't get distracted. 

So yeah, you get a little silly around him since you figured out that you have a crush on him. It happens. But also you don't want to make a total fool of yourself so some distance was in order. 

You just didn't account for Steven to just not let that happen. 

It's your day off when the inevitable happens. You were just getting ready to catch up on a TV show you had on your watchlist for a while when your doorbell rings. You get up, confused because you didn't expect any visitor or delivery, and walk over to your door. You open it to find the one man you didn’t plan on seeing. 

Steven smiles at you, standing there in your doorway like an excited puppy. 

"Hello! I hope I'm not disturbing you but we haven't seen eachother in a while and I wanted to check up on you."

Curse him and his puppy dog eyes. How could you turn him away like this? 

You clear your throat awkwardly and step aside to let him in. 

"Hi Steven. Yeah it's been a while. I didn't want to worry you."

He steps inside and you lead him into your living room. 

"You've been busy then, yeah?", he sits down in front of your TV and you join him, "I mean you didn't answer my calls or texts either so I thought maybe you weren't feeling well."

It's only now that you see the little container he's holding. Your heart squeezes in your chest. 

He got you soup because he thought you were sick. 

And all the while you had muted him in your contacts so you wouldn't be tempted. You were the worst human being on the planet. 

You take the offered soup, thanking him profusely. Quickly you carry it into your kitchen and return with some water for Steven. 

"You really didn't have to do this. See, I'm fine."

You smile at him as you place his water on the table. Steven returns your smile before his face turns thoughtful. 

Fuck, he looked so pretty even like this. His mouth twists into this little pout and you are once again wondering what it would feel like to press your lips against his, what sounds he would make as you lean in to kiss him, how he-

"-so it was either that or you were avoiding me."

You didn't even notice Steven was talking again. Curse Steven and his stupid, kissable mouth. 

"I- well…", you stammer. You couldn't lie to his face, you had to say the truth. "I was kind of avoiding you."

You regret it immediately. Steven looks at you like a kicked puppy. "Why?", he asks and just with that one word your heart breaks for him. 

It's too much, the guilt and the still lingering thoughts of Steven's lips on yours destroyed any brain-to-mouth filter you've ever had. 

“Because every time I see you, all I can think about is kissing you and I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about that.”

You slap your hand over your mouth, a desperate attempt to stop the words that have already left your lips. Steven stares at you, mouth agape and cheeks flushing. He starts stuttering and you can’t really make out what he's saying. 

"I'm so sorry. I didn't want to just dump this on you. I swear I had a plan and everything.", you groan, annoyed at yourself and hide your face behind your hands. 

Cautiously, softly, Steven asks: "Do you really want to kiss me?" 

He sounds like he doesn't believe it, that you couldn't possibly want that. And that could not stand. 

You take your hands off of your face and look directly into his eyes. 

"Steven Grant, I have been thinking about nothing else for the past weeks than how badly I want to kiss you. So believe me when I say that yes, I really really want to kiss you."

The noise that leaves Steven's mouth is the sweetest sound you've ever heard, something between a whine and a moan. You can't believe that he doesn't know what an effect he has on people. But you're happy to show him. 

"Would you- Do you want to- now?", he stumbles over his words, nerves overtaking him as he looks at you with such need in his eyes it almost leaves you breathless. 

Not a moment later you are on him, lips locked with his in a desperate first kiss. You swear you can see fireworks behind your eyelids as your lips connect. Steven whimpers into your mouth and his trembling hands hold onto you for support. In your rush you push Steven into the couch, all but laying on top of him as the two of you kiss to your heart's content. 

You force yourself to break apart from him with a gasp, forcing as much air into your lungs as possible. Steven looks up at you with dreamy eyes and a far away look, his face even more red than before. 

"Could we- Can you do that again?", he all but begs and with a laugh you nod. 

"Yes, Steven. As much as you want, whenever you want."

Immediately he pulls you back on top of him and seals your lips together again in another heedy kiss. 

[aprocessionofthoughts]

Trust

part 9 of DLM ao3

After the stew was done and Danny got out of the shower they all sat down to eat. They ate in silence for a while neither one of the bats wanting to push Danny into feeling uncomfortable, but Jason had a question he wanted to ask. He probably should have asked earlier, but he’ll blame it on the shock for not thinking of it sooner.

“Hey, Danny?”

“Yeah?” Danny said, setting his spoon down.

“How did you know it was me?”

Danny tilted his head and squinted, “What do you mean?”

Jason gestured with his spoon, off to the side Dick was watching them, his gaze analytical. “I mean, how did you know the guy in a red helmet was me?”

“Oh.” Danny settled and picked up his spoon again, through a mouthful of soup he answered, “It wuz th’ same ectoplasmic signature.”

Jason stared. He glanced at Dick, but he also looked confused.

Across from them Danny paused and glanced between them warily. He stared at Dick for a moment before turning to Jason. “Like I mentioned before, we’ve both been… death touched. And when someone’s been death touched a bit of ectoplasm gets incorporated into their system, the amount of ectoplasm varies depending on the situation. But when ectoplasm binds with a person it develops its own unique chemical signature. You can think of it like DNA. Ghosts and some machines can sense the differences, so when I came across Red Hood, I could sense that it was you.”

“Huh.” Jason said unable to come up with anything else in the face of discovering that he gave of what probably amounted to his own unique radioactive signal.

“And you said some machines can track this?” Dick asked. Jason was thankful that his brother was here because he wasn’t sure if he was up for asking all the necessary questions.

Danny looked hesitant again and looked at jason.

Jason nodded at him and Danny looked a little reassured.

“Yeah. There are a few. That’s how the GIW are tracking me. I don’t think they were around Jason enough to latch onto his ecto-signature so you shouldn’t need to be worried about them tracking you down. Gotham has plenty of low level ghosts so their scanners should be pretty muddled. But that’s also why I should go. My signature is stronger than the shades of Gotham and They know how to track it. I don’t want to give you any more trouble.”  Daanny wasn't looking at either of them, instead he was completely focused on stirring his stew.

Jason and Dick glanced at each other.

“Hey, Danny, look at me.” Jason said.

It took a bit, but eventually Danny looked up.”

Jason smiled slightly, “I told you I’d protect you, didn’t I?”

Danny looked away, biting his lip. “I don’t want to put you in danger.”

Jason reached across the table and placed his hand over one of Danny’s. “I’m Red Hood, kid, I can defend myself. And there are plenty of bats in Gotham who would love to help.”

“The GIW are different. They don’t care who they have to hurt to get what they want. They’ll just keep bringing in more agents until they get me.”

“Well then we’ll bring in the Justice League.” Jason said, Bruce would be okay with it if Jason told him it was to protect a kid. 

“I don’t want you to get caught in the crossfire. I won’t let you get hurt.” Danny said, shaking his head. 

Jason glanced over at his brother. Dick was always better with the emotional talk.

“We’re vigilantes Danny. We’ve been trained in defending ourselves and others.” Dick said.

“And they wouldn’t be able to take us down without causing people to go after them for attacking vigilantes.” Jason added.

Danny shook his head harder, he was staring at the table, his eyes slightly glossy. “They won’t care, they'll lie and say you were defending dangerous creatures, that you were being manipulated by evil ghosts.” Danny laughed bitterly. “Or they’ll claim you’re also contaminated and capture or exterminate you. They’ll do anything to get what they want.”

There was more to this, Jason knew. Something bad had happened to the kid, apart from the obvious scar, but now wasn’t the time to push for information. Right now, they needed to convince Danny to stay with them, to let them protect him.

Jason got up, walked around the table and crouched by Danny’s chair. “Kid, look at me.” Jason said gently. He waited till Danny did before continuing. “I know you’re scared,” Danny opened his mouth and Jason continued before he could argue, “and I know you’re worried about us getting hurt. But this is what we do. We fight to protect people. And there are a lot of powerful people on our side. And I’m sorry we haven’t been there for you before, I’m sorry we didn’t get to you in time in the past, but we’re here now. Together we can take down the GIW. Let us help you.”

Danny’s eyes started watering, and Jason reached up to give his shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

Then Jason was falling back as the kid launched himself at him. Jason held Danny as he started to sob. “I’ve got you, kid. I’ve got you.”

“Thank you.” Danny whispered as he cried. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

[fishsticksloser]

Could I ask for a future Rise Donnie x fem reader that is angst that could possibly turn to comfort where reader has doubts about being with him because maybe he has been spending more time to finish up a project and idk where i was goin i jsut crave sweet sweet ✨Emotional Devastation✨

Miss You More Than Life

F!Donnie x gn!reader

Warnings: angst, Donnie is not good at balancing life and work, no comfort (sorry), insecurity

A/N: Soups up. You know I love angst... I have so many angsty (or at least I can make them angsty) requests at the moment. 2 f!Donnie fics in a row? It's more likely than you think...

Donnie was busy, of course he was busy. He's the smartest out of all the yo'kai, mutants, humans on base. At the moment he was studying some new Kraang tech a team brought in for him. He had been excited when it was placed on his desk, immediately working on it instead of continuing his conversation with you.

⋆｡ ﾟ｡☁︎👾｡ ﾟ｡⋆

You quietly step into Donnie's lab, not wanting to distract him. He had told Leo he was close on figuring something out. You gently set a few papers, just reports and inventory, on his desk as well as some water and food for him. Always supportive, you press a kiss to his temple, letting your lips linger for a moment. "Are you coming to bed tonight?"

Donnie glances up from his work, he couldn't help but feel a small sense of irritation creeping up within him from your interruption. "The weight of the world rests on my shoulders, I have to keep working to find a way to stop the Kraang." He paused for a moment, his eyes narrowing as he continued. "I have important tests to run and calculations to make." With a dismissive wave of his hand, Donnie returned his attention to his work, clearly indicating he had no intention of joining you in bed.

Your heart breaks a little at his dismissal. "You could've just said no." You mumble, though you're not sure if he heard due to his focus. You wanted to kiss him again, but based on how he spoke, you decided not to. "Goodnight, Donnie. Please at least make sure to eat." You say softly, hiding your frustration and sadness before heading off to bed.

Donnie's eyes flicked up from his work, barely catching the sadness in your voice. For a brief moment, he felt a pang of guilt. But he quickly dismissed it, burying himself deeper in his work. He didn't have time for distractions. As you left the room, Donnie didn't even turn to watch you go. But deep down, a part of him wished to prioritize you and your needs. Unfortunately, that part was overshadowed by his drive for scientific discovery and the weight of the world on his shoulders.

⋆｡ ﾟ｡☁︎👾｡ ﾟ｡⋆

In the morning, you get ready for your normal duties around the base. You step back into the lab to leave, seeing Donnie engrossed in his work, his attention fixed on the task at hand. He doesn't even spare a glace your way, your heart sinking as you gather up the empty plates and completed reports.

You watch him for a moment, feeling a mix of frustration and sadness welling up inside you. With a heavy sigh, you decide to respect his space and silently leave the lab. You hope one day he will notice your efforts and appreciate the support you provide, but for now, you continue your duties.

The rest of the day, you handed off tasks that required going to Donnie's lab. As much as you yearned to see him, you couldn't stand it. But soon night fell and the only place to go was back to bed.

Donnie barely registered your presence as you entered the lab. His eyes remaining focused on the screen in front of him, his mind consumed by calculations and theories. When you pressed a short kiss to his temple, he barely reacted, his focus unwavering.

Donnie finally looked up from his work when you left without a word, a hint of confusion flashing across his face. He watched you go, a mix of emotions swirling within him. Part of him wanted to call out to you, to apologize for his single-mindedness and selfishness. But the stubborn side of him refused to admit his own faults.

With a sigh, Donnie returned his gaze to his work. Deep down, he knew he had taken you for granted. But for now he continued to toil away, convinced that his pursuit to defeat the Kraang was more important than anything else.

⋆｡ ﾟ｡☁︎👾｡ ﾟ｡⋆

It continued like this for weeks, almost months. Your heart aching, sleep lacking. Donnie seemed to only got to bed if you weren't there.

Did he hate me? Did he realize that he no longer wants me around?

One day though, you had to be on night watch so you decided to sleep in the middle of the day.

As you entered the lab, the emptiness weighted heavily on you. The absence of Donnie's presence intensified the ache in your heart. With each step you felt unsure of where you stood in his life anymore.

When you reached your bedroom and saw Donnie peacefully sleeping, a part of you yearned to crawl into bed beside him, to seek solace in his embrace. But the fear of upsetting him held you back. He hadn't wanted to be in bed with you in weeks, why would he now?

Instead, you grabbed your pillow and silently retreated to the couch in his lab, resigning yourself to sleep in solitude. You lay on the couch, surrounded by the paraphernalia of Donnie's scientific pursuits, a wave of sadness crashes over you. You couldn't help but wonder if he still wanted you around, if he still cared about your presence. The doubts and insecurities ate away at you, leaving you feeling empty and alone.

Despite the pain, you had remained quietly supportive, hoping that one day Donnie would realize the impact his distance was having on you. In the darkness of the lab, you clung to the hope that he would wake up and see how much you longed for his love and attention.

[mousfri]

do you mind talking about will's narcissism? i see ppl talk about that aspect of hannibal far more. also are you drawing a line between will being narcissistic and hannibal being egotistical for character analysis reasons or just to vary word choice? if it's the former, why do you make that distinction?

part of the reason you won't see much of will's narcissistic traits being mentioned is because a concerning number of fannibals like to misrepresent him as caring and selfless. it's highly ironic given his entire character is based around how desperate he is to pretend he meets that ideal of a loving, stable entirely conventional person.

i do tend to lean towards making a distinction between will's narcissism and hannibal's egotism, but it's not so much in relation to differences in their definitions as it is the meanings i associate with each term. you could probably use them interchangeably if you were going off dictionary definitions, but it's a good way to separate how and why hannibal and will each make self-centred decisions.

hannibal's egotism is grounded in his sense of superiority. he thinks himself better than others, and so he will nearly always prioritise his wants and desires over the wants of others. he is highly capable of observing, understanding and analysing the emotional responses and actions of others - it's what makes him such a good manipulator. he knows EXACTLY how to frighten or comfort or confuse someone. he knows what they want. he simply doesn't care. he does what HE thinks is best regardless of whether the object of that action would agree. selfish decisions are made in the conscious knowledge that he is better and so he MUST BE right.

this is what makes decisions like saving will over killing alana and choosing to give will the benefit of the doubt when he smells freddie on him particularly interesting. it's evidence of will's creeping influence on him, the significance of the opinions and actions of a man who he cannot predict but who he cannot help but hold in the highest regard.

will's tendency to be self-centred predates hannibal's involvement. it's much less evident when he's sick, but it is there. beverly basically tells him as much, although in much nicer words that i'm about to use. with jack telling will it's necessary he works on one side and hannibal trying to convince him he's too mentally ill to keep functioning on the other, you really can't justify why will chooses to keep working through his illness. he knew he was sick, he knew how often he'd begun to hallucinate violence, murder. he knew he was losing whole swathes of time, where he couldn't account for his whereabouts but was clearly competent enough to drive and navigate. despite that equal jack-hannibal dichotomy, will decides that upholding the ideal of crime-fighting, innocent, capable fbi agent will graham was far more important than the potential danger. sacrificing his health in the process was not selfless (particularly not in a universe where there are no long-term impacts of nearly becoming brain soup), it was an expression of how much harm he was willing to do to maintain his false sense of self. but he mostly hurt himself with this one. and abigail, obviously.

speaking of abigail, there's only a couple examples with her i'm going to bring up, but their entire pseudo father-daughter relationship was a projection of that false sense of self (caring, loving father figure) onto abigail. it was an expression of that particular brand of narcissism - he didn't see her, he only saw who she COULD BE in relation to who HE could be.

firstly there's the fact that he knew he was sick and yet risked going to an isolated area with her alone anyway. that obviously went super well. and then there's him telling her how ugly killing is. yes, he didn't know she'd killed yet, but where was all of that graham patented empathy when she was so clearly guilty about SOMETHING. again, his ideal is more important to him than her feelings. he doesn't actually stop to think about her at all, only how he expects her to feel, how he WANTS her to feel. how HE wants to feel. i mean even hannibal was judging him for that one,,,

moving on to s2, we've got matthew brown and related shenanigans occurring. now i'm not counting his interactions with beverly as particularly problematic because it was a fairly even relationship, and she mostly involved herself in his business (sorry bev i love you but sneaking into hannibal's house???). but matthew was a little different. quite frankly i don't care about will manipulating him, just as i don't particularly care about will manipulating hannibal - you can easily justify those decisions because lying is hardly the worst either of them have done. BUT. will knew about matthew (or at least suspected) far before the 'we're hawks, mr. graham' speech, which meant will (who by this point in the season has chilton hanging on his every word out of self-preservation, and jack slowly and surely moving in the right direction) knew matthew had killed and would kill again and did NOTHING.

matthew was more useful to him close than locked up. it would've been easy for chilton (yk matthew's boss who is totally willing to commit a little malpractice) to getting him fired at least, locked up at best. but nope, because matthew is useful to will and unlike hannibal he hasn't actually tried to manipulate him at all. it's not will's job to catch him, the ideal of will as stable and innocent seems further away than ever with bev dead, so why would he try? who cares about any innocents that get killed while he keeps matthew nice and free to be used at his convenience?

and THEN he lies to jack from the very beginning. he really says, out loud with full confidence, that nothing he did or said caused matthew to try and kill hannibal. and the insane thing is that he believes it. to an extent - in his mind, hannibal has earned this. pain, preferably death, at his hand by proxy. in his mind, he's washed his hands of it. he can still convince himself that this is not proof that he is just as murderous as hannibal sees him, and that he knows who he is (certainly not a killer, because it's not really murder if hannibal deserves it, is it? (idiot)).

comparatively to hannibal's egotism, will's narcissism is much less conscious. he often makes choices based purely on the impact it'll have on his plans, without ever stopping to consider who he harms in the process.

but my favourite example is chiyoh (<3).

he does not care about her prisoner. he does not care about chiyoh's duty. what he cares about is the fact that he wants her to go with him to find hannibal. he acts as if he's entitled to it - he sees her use to him, sees their similarities, and decides he must have it for himself. will cares so little about how she feels about killing him that he somehow STILL manages to perceive himself as some kind of victim in the aftermath. regardless of whether chiyoh kills the prisoner, will has either made her a murderer or ended a decades long commitment to hannibal lecter. fannibals who argue that will is in any way naturally caring or selfless should go rewatch that whole sequence and come back to me with a caring and selfless explanation for that move.

there are plenty more examples of this happening through the rest of the season too. will's immediate change of plans upon finding out hannibal loves him (confirmation he is wanted, finally ready to claim his prize through whatever means necessary). how easily he gives up on repairing his relationship with walt (because really he could've made ANY effort to explain). his framing of chilton as his 'pet' to get francis to respond (i mean REALLY?? man's been through enough goddamn).

the manifestation of their narcissistic traits is very different, but they're present in both of them. ultimately it's the fact that they are often exceptions to each other's rules that makes them so good together, and so compelling to think about too.

thank you very much for the ask!! as usual it has given me an opportunity to infodump about hannigram, which i always love and appreciate.

[delqcate]

hi love!! i was wondering if I could request something for scott barringer? i'm the same anon from yesterday btw :)) could it be something where they have like a frenemies type relationship? she's quite witty and a bit of a bitch to him, mainly because he's a jerk to her, but they're friends not down right enemies, almost like banter that they look forward to. then one day she takes a walk during a storm in the middle of the night, and catches scott outside in the middle of the night, and he's upset and tells her about what happened to him and she comforts him? and they like become something?

YOU'LL BE THE FIRST WHO EVER DID

when i got this req i was so excited because 1, i haven't wrote an ask in soooo long, and 2, this is sort of me experimenting with another type of character since in my eyes i always write them sweet n stuff. but anyways i hope you all enjoy this especially u anon! <3

warnings/cw: mentions of abuse (not from scott or reader), cussing, etc.

word count: 1.7k (FINALLY MORE THAN 100 WORDS)

paring: scott barringer x reader

The last class of the day had just finished, and after listening to Jeff's lecture all day you were ready to take a nap when you remembered that the Cliffhangers were assigned to kitchen cleaning duty. So after dropping off your things at the cabin, you make your way to meet with the others.

"Ezra, stop that. I'm not sure we even cleaned that yet!" Was the first thing you could hear from the kitchen, it was Kat's voice. As soon as you head inside you finally get a good view of the situation. Ezra had a soup pot on his head, which did look like it had a bit of dirt on the outside, everyone else was either cleaning or watching everything going on.

Expect one. The one that, despite all your banter, you could tolerate the most.

His eyes were on you again for a short moment before clearing his throat and letting his raspy voice fill your ears. "I could use your help over here." He looks back down at the sink and you nod once, heading over to him.

"Barringer." You mumble as you stand beside him, taking the washed dish from him and drying it up with a rag nearby. "Could you have been any more late? Being surrounded by these idiots is probably worse than being with you." He says as he finishes up another plate.

You scoff and put the plate down, taking the next plate to wash. "As if you're any better, I'm surprised Auggie and Ezra aren't sick of you being such a buzz kill." You put the plate down and move your gaze to him.

As if he could sense it, he moved his gaze to you. It was there again, that tension that always confused the both of you. Ever since the first day you met the both of you had this banter that everyone noticed, it was like sparks.

As weeks went by the both of you learned how to tolerate each other better, and while he could still be a jerk, he was a tolerable jerk. More tolerable than the rest anyway.

You notice a small grin on his face, and you return it as well. "Well, I only like being a buzz kill for you." He smirks and looks back at the sink. "And I like being late to piss you off." You smile sarcastically and head off to help everyone else. He turns his head to watch you for a moment, his eyes just couldn't leave you.

A handful of days had passed and the weather was getting worse each day, it was getting cold so you understood why. What you didn't understand was Scott hadn't been going to classes lately, and every time you tried to talk to him, he was a complete jerk just like the first time you two met.

You didn't understand why he was like this, maybe his emotions just like to change with the weather? It had been raining harder than usual and there were the occasional thunderstorms.

But you had other things to worry about, like the fact you decided to take a walk in the forest but instead was running around in the dark as the rain poured down on her. The thunder was loud, pounding in her ears.

You slowed down her moments to try and see anything through the storm, but it was just a view of never-ending trees. Until you heard footsteps, the splash of water, someone else was thankful out here with you. Unless it was an animal. Or a random person.

"Hello? Is anyone there!" You yell out, hoping they can hear you. "Over here!" They yell out, they sound familiar yet strange, as if something happened. You quickly rush over as their voice gets louder, yelping as you bump into them.

"Shit, I'm so sorry-" She looks up at her eyes widen, her breath hitching. "Scott? What are you doing out here?" You were speechless, you didn't expect him out of all people to be here. He had been isolating himself in the cabin.

"Let's just get back, ok? Who cares about me!" His raspy voice filled your ears, but this didn't sound like him trying to be a jerk. It sounded like he had just cried. "I care, Scott!" You suddenly yell out.

You would agree that both of you needed to find shelter before the rain gets worse or both of you would be stranded and get sick, but who cares about any of that right now?

"Please, why have you been isolating yourself from us?" You plead out to him, trying to read his eyes. He was always tough to read, he always hid his emotions in his cocky personality. You try reaching your hand for his but he immediately backs away, and your heart breaks.

Everyone knew what happened to Scott, his mother abusing him, but you dismissed it. Rumors always spread around here, it was probably made up, but this scared you because what if it was all true?

"I know- I know that you know..." his breath was heavy, his hand ran through his hair and his back hit the tree, slowly sliding down as he covered his face. Your heart slowly broke as you stood there feeling helpless, you were afraid to touch him because you didn't want to hurt him.

You got down on your knees and gulped, taking a deep breath. You slowly reach your hand out to him, gently placing your hand on his knee. At first, you felt him flinch, almost as if he wanted to pull away, but he couldn't. It was a cliche but he felt like you were different, so he let your hand stay there.

After a moment of letting the rain and thunder fill your ears, he finally spoke up. His voice was soft and still as raspy as ever. "I didn't want it, y'know? I mean, I thought I did but-" His voice started to break and you pushed his hair back as a silent way to stop him, you didn't want to bring back any memories the rain was already giving him.

"You didn't. I know." You whisper back, even if it was inaudible due to the weather. "I'm guessing the weather had something to do with the situation?" You watch as he slowly lifts his head and removes one hand to reveal half of his face, the rain is calming down.

"Yeah...you smartass." He chuckles, and you happily return one. This felt different from all your other encounters with each other, more intimate but not the type of way people would think. "You're soaked, idiot." You let out as you stand up, looking around.

"Hey, I can see Horizon from here." You look back down at him, his head already looking up at you. You can tell he wants to say something so you get back to his level. "What's up?"

He looks around, poking his cheek with his tongue. He's never been in a relationship nor has he found any interest in being in one, but the way you made him feel was different than he felt with other people.

"I- god, this is harder than I thought." He chuckles and gulps, bouncing his leg slightly. You suddenly feel nervous, you've never seen him like this before but you let him continue to show you really are listening.

"You make me feel something that I haven't felt with any girl, or I guess anyone. You make me feel safe and uhm..." He looks over at a nearby puddle and gets up, scrambling to pull out a small flower. He faces you and watches as you stand up, heading towards him.

He looked like a nervous teenage boy, and you found that adorable since he's never shown any type of vulnerability. "Will you maybe be the only person I can tolerate here? When you hold me I- It feels like you're the only person to make me feel all.. tingly." He looks at you, his eyes almost pleading.

"Scott, I..." You were at a loss for words, you'd immediately say yes if it wasn't for what had just happened. Was he sure he wanted this? You didn't want him jumping into something after he was just so vulnerable.

"Oh- yeah. No, no, I get it. God, I'm so stupid-" As he turns away to throw the flimsy flower, you take his arm and spin him to look at you. You felt bad that you weren't even thinking after grabbing him like that, despite him basically saying your touch made him feel safe, you couldn't be too sure.

"No, I just want you to be sure you want this. I don't want you jumping into anything you're not sure of." You frown and slowly move closer to him and he does the same, looking into your eyes. His free hand moves over to cup the nape of your neck and he whispers.

"I confessed my love for you in the rain and you need more confirmation?" He chuckles and you feel a soft smile on your face. "Alright, whatever you want." He leans in and kisses you softly, it was like sparks as soon as your lips met.

You wrap your arms around his neck and make a soft noise, both of you deepening the kiss with each passing second. After a while, both of you slowly break apart and take a moment to breathe before letting out a laugh. Your face had a wide smile and Scott had that soft grin on him as his hand travels to your hair and gently places the flower.

"I thought that if I ever told anybody, I'd never be able to look at them again." His voice gradually gets softer, his gaze softening alongside. "You're looking at me now, aren't you?" You say in the same tone as him. "Mhm, and what a beautiful sight it is."

You both share a small chuckle before walking back to the cabin hand in hand. The Cliffhangers will definitely have a field day as soon as they find out, but for now, no one has to know.