#lap tortoise

[thewhimsyturtle]

Saturdays are for snuggles!

[mothlover69]

I wrestled with a tortoise today (which was so fun tbh) and im just like *twirls hair* i wonder if my f/os woulda thought i was soooo hot ;3

[luveline]

hiiii not sure if your requests are open but if they aren’t just ignore this😭

imagine getting into an argument with james, sirius, and remus because you brought a stray kitten or something home and you really don’t have the room for a kitten

“but look at him🥺”

“no”

“🥺”

“… no” *less convincingly*

You hold the kitten in your hand. Remus strokes her head, her little damp ears. “It's not about that, Remus, I just couldn't leave her there, the box was falling apart and… I thought that only happened in movies.” 

Sirius leans forward on his knees to give the kitten a stroke of his own. “She's lovely,” he murmurs, scratching under her chin and grinning when she moves into it for more. “It's too bad the flat's so small. Otherwise we could keep her.” 

She's tortoise shell with a white half circle around her mouth, eyes squinted closed as she shivers. You've wrapped her in a tea towel like a blanket. She is, without a doubt, that cutest and saddest creature you've ever seen. “Where is she supposed to go, Siri?” you ask gently. 

“People love cats.” Sirius puts his hand on Remus' thigh casually, giving it a loving squeeze as he settles in. “Everybody wants a kitten.” 

But not everyone will be nice to a kitten. She feels like your responsibility now; how can you leave her? She's burrowed into you from the moment you picked her up, shushing and murmuring, your knees sodden in the puddle of rainwater beneath you both. 

“We have to keep her, please,” you say. 

There's a mutual surprise. “Dove, we can't,” Remus says. “The bathroom barely fits the toilet, shower, and sink, we'd never be able to have a litter box.” 

“It wouldn't be fair,” Sirius agrees, “on us or the kitten, she'd have no room once she turns into a cat.” 

You bring the kitten close to your chest and show them her helpless face. “But look at her,” you say softly, widening your eyes gently, your brows bunched together in the beginnings of heartbreak. 

“No,” Remus says, shaking his head sympathetically. 

You frown at him and Sirius in turn, your bottom lip jutting out ever so slightly. 

“No,” he says again, sounding unsure. 

Sirius rubs his leg. “Stay strong, my love.” 

“There's just not enough room.” 

You fear you may be losing this battle, and if they really don't want a cat, maybe you shouldn't force them. But then your trump card comes out of the bathroom with a towel around his neck, shirtless, grey joggers low on his hips, and you know you still have a chance. 

“Wow, Jamie,” you say, not having to act very much to give your voice a hoarse rasp, “you might need to shower again.” 

His smile is magnetic. “Yeah?” he asks, immediately delighted by such a brazen comment. “How's the little sweetheart? Reckon we can leave her alone?” 

“She's cold still,” you say.

James visibly melts at your sad tone, while Remus rolls his eyes. “She's just trying to get you on her side, James. I've said we can't keep the cat and she's–” 

“Taking advantage of her feminine wiles?” Sirius suggests. 

“Cheating,” Remus finishes. 

James leans over the back of the sofa between your head and Remus to kiss behind your ear, a brief press of the lips. “Why should I care? Doesn't she deserve her own way?” 

“It's not as though I'm lying,” you say guiltily. 

James laughs and kisses your jaw. You bring your shoulder up to your chin and flush with heat at such a simple thing, trying your hardest not to jostle the kitten in your hand as he wraps an arm around your front, resting his face against yours. The wet curls of his hair are cold on your skin, and the straight line of his jaw digs in. “I know,” he says. 

“Catch on, Jamie,” Remus says. 

“Shan't, won't.” Another kiss to your cheek. 

“Please, Remus, I promise if you don't want her then I won't make you, but if it's about room, of course there's enough. The four of us manage to squeeze in, don't we?” You lean into James’ embrace, eyes melty-soft. You're practically batting your eyelashes at him. 

Sirius flops into Remus’ lap with a resigned sigh. “If you don't say yes, I will anyway. Look at her.” 

You don't know if he means the kitten or you, but you choose to believe it's you he's complimenting, and you react accordingly, your little smile pushing Remus completely over the edge. 

He sighs. “Yes, alright. Fine.” 

You pass James the little warm parcel of fur and use your freshly emptied hands to grab Remus by both arms. “Thank you! Aw, thank you, Remus. Sirius. I'll be so absolutely clean and if it does seem too small I promise, I won't make anyone suffer.” 

“I never thought you would,” he says. “If you really want to keep her, I can't stop you. I'm your boyfriend, not a prison warden.” 

“Well, we share a home–” 

“I know,” he says warmly, “it's alright. Keep your kitten, dove. Looks like you've found her for a reason.” 

You laugh happily and gather him up for a hug. “Oh, I love you.” 

“What shall we name her?” Sirius asks around you. 

“I'm not fussed. What do you like?” James asks. 

Sirius meets your eyes as you and Remus pull apart. “You always get your way, hmm? Why don't you name her?” 

Oh, you could hug him to death too. He looks comfortable where he is, his face on Remus thigh, hair fanned out over his joggers, and you don't want to disturb him (he's not quite as tactile as the others), so you stroke a curl from his cheek and offer him a cheeky smile. “Don't you have any ideas?” you ask. 

“About you, or the cat?” 

You laugh at his teasing. “Which one do you think?” 

Remus nudges you in the ribs. “Don't start. If we're keeping your cat, we need to go out, don't we? You'll have to go get dressed again.”

You give them all a glowing smile and clamber off of the sofa to find your shoes. 

[spitinsideme]

maid pomni is helping ragatba with her makeup !!!! (ragatba can perfectly do it herself, she just wnats an excuse to hold pomni in her lap and have her so close)

ALSO !!!! BECAUDE I FOR SOME REASON AM SO INTO THIS AU RIGHT NOW !!! i made little reference sheets for them ... becaude i love them

ALSO !!! going to talk about this au now i have .. her name is agatha abernathy, she got married youmg because youknow texas wasnt accepting of lesbians and she was caught kissing a girl when she was 16, so she married some rich guy family friend FAST to have her parents forgive her and she absolutely hates it (then her little lover pomni came along bless pathetic girls) she still likes horses and she has a horse ranch but she owns a cat, a litrle tortoise one .. he is the best and hid name is Curtis. shes southern from texas obviously, and shes 30 and RICH !!!! she has maids and shit shes richrich .... thats it for now honestly until i expand more on it i guess

pomni !!!! shes russian american because russian name word whatever .. pomni golubeva because i saw that it means pigeon and ithink .. thats funny .. shes like working class, she appplied for the maid job but she has SHIT skills and cant do anything but ragatha was like aww shes like a loser and just accepted her, she tries her best and everything shes so silly ... she looks so good in a maid uniform ... thatd it for now i will expand on them mor late but SHE HAS FRECKLES !!!!! ON HER BODY !!! hadd to point yhat out

[gojoroui]

Hi! Can i request a headcannon where they get jealous of your pet 🥹 ? Any pet and fandom is fine 🫶

DOMESTIC FIGHT

cw: blue lock x gn! reader, fluff, headcannon, jealousy, pets can be chosen / they focus on cats tho

a/n: thanks for requesting anon !! hopefully this is what u want , it’s kinda long -︵-

rin just shrugged when you told him you owned a pet. he saw it normal that his partner had a pet, what else could possibly be wrong? well, rin now despises your pet. whenever you let it out or call it over - that was when the action starts. the animal would start nuzzling you and take your attention away from him. and whenever rin tries pulling you closer to him, it would just hiss; like he was gonna harm you or something. and rin wasn’t dumb about it; every night, he would brainstorm on how to get rid of it - trying not to upset you in the process.

sae is similar to his younger brother, but instead - the pet despises him. sae simply ignore the creature with his sanity, he doesn’t give a damn about the pet; although he gets scolded by you, the animal can’t do anything about can it? he doesn’t feed, play, or even share you with the domestic animal — it gets on the pet’s nerves. and sae just ignores it. you almost walked into sae and your cat ‘wrestling’ each other once. he also sometimes grabs your pet and replaces it whenever it takes his spot — your lap.

isagi is probably the only one that gets along with your pet. it’s probably either he has second nature or the pet is just fond with him. you’ll sometimes find the two playing or napping together. you sometimes think that your cat might like isagi more than you. but isagi always says that your pet obviously likes you more; but how can you agree when your pet’s always following him when he goes home? even so, at least they get along… maybe they get along too well.

nagi. let’s say he doesn’t really give a shit about your pet. they already went off on a bad start the second they met. he pretty much despises the pet; like, how can he not when it’s hogging you all to itself. you’ll often catch nagi giving death glares at your pet whenever their in the same room. they’ll have starring contests once in while, and if you were being honest, ‘if looks could kill’ would be the best way to describe the two. and nagi isn’t the guy who would have dates out in the world, he’d obviously prefer to do house dates - but when it comes to your pet - he’s always up to go to his house or a public date. anywhere away from that ‘thing’.

reo honestly just reacted with a ‘cool’ when mentioning you had a pet. but it’s not very cool once he meets it. he would often tell you that your pet is literally the definition of satan. it wasn’t like your pet scratched the furniture, it was just that it took your attention away from him. sometimes, whenever you left to get something in another room - he would ‘gently’ grab the domestic animal by the throat and point his finger in its face, telling it threats to back away from you. but the animal was stubborn and ignored every word he punctuated. making him loathe the pet even more.

bachira is just like any other person. caring and loving for your pet, it’s like a lil family to him. but sometimes, if your pet is an introvert, things might get a little messy and the pet might be the one despising him. but it’s ok! if your pet is extrovert, they’d have a fantastic time. it’s like their best friends or even brothers. overall, bachira is amazing at pets ( just don’t get him a tortoise, it might bore him )

[chanshoesunite]

Chan wants to record your moans for a song

GENRE: smut WORD COUNT: 2.6k Author’s Note (Author Hare): This is my 500 follower hug for y’all inspired by two prompts given to me by my favourite reader of all times, Author Tortoise. Maybe you can guess what they are! WARNINGS: rated M (minors do not engage!), unsafe sex (wrap it up, kids), slight dirty talk, Chan calls reader a slut (but in a very loving way)

You unlock the door, enter the flat and kick off your heeled ankle boots, balancing two bags of takeout as you do. Having successfully completed that task, you dump them on the floor and shrug out of your coat as your obligatory “honey, I’m home” call stays unanswered. You smile to yourself – you’d expected that; it means that your boyfriend is still so focused on creating music, he forgets the world around him. That is also the main reason why he got you a key to his flat – more than once had you been standing in front of the door, waiting for him to open it for you, and he simply hadn’t heard the doorbell, lost as he was in his creative process.

You’re still in your work clothes – a black dress (that might have screamed “overdressed!” to some people, but you are aware that being overdressed is a concept created by people who don’t want women to feel beautiful every day), stockings and bright red lipstick – as you make your way through the hallway with the sashimi you’ve picked up at Chan’s favourite place to treat him for dinner.

You knock on his studio door, but the gesture is again futile – through the glass door, you can see that he’s wearing massive headphones and can’t hear anything that’s not blasted through those. You take a moment to watch him – he is clad simply in a black oversized shirt, his hair a dark mess as if he’d dragged his hands through it a hundred times today while looking for words and melodies to match in ways that you find to be positively magical. Elbows on his desk, his gaze is turned towards the ceiling as he vibes with the music, nodding to the beat, critically analysing something he has created. It’s so incredibly attractive, the way he is so focused on and passionate about his work, your heart is full just looking at him.

The song seems to end because Chan looks down and catches your eye. He gives a little start – after all, he thought he was alone in his flat until a few seconds ago – and then a glowing smile takes over his face. He waves to you in an almost childlike gesture, and you mirror his smile as you enter the studio. Chan pulls the headphones off, letting them rest around his neck before putting them on the desk. “Hey, baby girl,” he greets you happily, rolling back in his swivel chair and patting his thighs. “Come here!”

You oblige, sitting in his lap, your legs dangling over one of the armrests as your arms come to rest on his broad shoulders. You lean in to kiss him, and though you mean it only to be a peck, your kiss lasts a little longer and feels a little more heated than your average welcome back kiss. “Hi,” you whisper, smiling, as you pull back eventually.

Chan’s eyes are fixed on your red lips, but eventually stray as they take in your dress. “You look beautiful,” he pronounces, his hand sliding down the skirt of your dress and coming to rest on your knee. “Did you have a good day?”

You nod emphatically, your curls bouncing as if supporting your claim as you recount your successful day at the publishing company where you work. “The presentation went very well. The boss was ecstatic and said I’ll get to manage more of the marketing campaigns since I’m doing such a good job.” You nod to the takeout bags. “I got us some sashimi to celebrate.”

Chan’s face, which had lit up at the news, now takes on an even more enthusiastic expression. “I’m so proud of you, baby, those are wonderful news! I’m so glad your boss can see how dedicated, hardworking, and talented you are! And I’m happy I get to celebrate with you. Thanks for bringing dinner.” He nuzzles into your neck, and you giggle, feeling giddy at his euphoria.

“Thanks for being such a hype boy, babe. And how was your day? How is the new album coming along?” You glance at the computer, where Chan has obviously been busy mixing a sound file. Chan shrugs. “Ah, you knaur.” He’s trying to sound non-committal, but you know that he cares deeply. “I’m trying to write a new unit song. Hyunjin is in it, so it needs to be racy.” He winks at you. “Another hoe anthem, you mean?” Your boyfriend bursts out laughing. “Something like that. Do you want to hear it?” “Sure!” You always love listening to early versions of songs – it is intriguing to watch Chan decide what to keep and what to cut, what to put on demos – and then listen to the final product as it is released. The process is fascinating, and you love being a part of it, even if you’re only a spectator.

Chan reaches around you, and you turn to face the computer, leaning back against his broad chest. His left hand slips around your waist, securing him against you as he starts the song. Immediately you know why this song is meant for Hyunjin; it is a dark-sounding RnB track that seems to continue the tradition laid down in “Red Lights” and “Taste”. There is an almost hypnotic organ melody that reminds you of church, but in a distinctly unholy way as it is paired with lyrics such as “I know that we shouldn’t, but I want to”. Chan’s voice on the demo carries the song without difficulties, and it’s positively captivating; breathy whispers and slight vocal fries add to the sexy tone of the song.

You feel the mood in the room shift, anticipation making room for arousal. You shiver in Chan’s arms listening to it, and you feel your boyfriend shift beneath you before he presses a kiss to your neck. “Do you like it?” he breathes into your ear, and the air against your neck tickles you in a decidedly not innocent way.

You nod, releasing a breath you don’t know you’ve been holding. “It’s definitely racy,” you agree, your breath hitching as Chan continues to kiss your neck while the song moves into the second verse. You can feel him smile against your skin.

“It’s almost as if hearing my voice singing it is doing something to you, baby girl. It must be like me getting dirty thoughts when you wear lipstick like that,” he almost purrs, gently biting your earlobe as his right hand finds your breast, teasing it through the cloth. A tiny gasp escapes you, and even though the music is still playing, it doesn’t slip Chan’s attention. “God,” he almost growls. “Your moans would sound so good on this track.”

That one sentence causes you to groan again, and Chan’s hand slips from your waist downwards, under your dress and directly into your panties. He gasps at the wetness he finds there and starts stroking you softly, maddeningly, but not in any way that could actually do something for you except tease you further. “Does it turn you on that much, baby girl? Hearing me sing a naughty song, knowing I wrote it thinking about your body? Do you like the idea of me recording your moans, putting them on the track, having the fans wonder who got so horny just listening to the demo version? You’re such a little slut, baby.”

At the word slut, he pushes a finger into your pussy, and this time, your moan is anything but quiet as you throw your head back. The song comes to a close, ending, just as it started, with the organ melody, and the only thing you can hear is Chan’s finger sliding into you and the two of you breathing heavily.

“So,” he drawls, almost sounding bored but of course he’s anything but as his thumb comes to circle your clit. “What do you say?” You meet his eyes as he glances down on your face, still hypnotized by your lipstick. “You know,” you rasp. “Your song is so hot I wish I could fuck it, but I can’t. So I will fuck you instead.” You watch as Chan’s pupils dilate, and the growl that escapes his throat as he claims your lips is almost feral. Well, you know what you do to him, and you have him exactly where you want him.

“Turn on the mic,” you breathe as you pull his hands off you. In a quick gesture, you grab the hem of your dress and discard it onto the floor, standing in front of him in just your stockings and black underwear, lasciviously leaning against the desk. “Let’s see how good these moans sound.”

He seems to contemplate your words for a few seconds before he takes a step closer and, his eyes never leaving yours, leans forward to push a few keys on his keyboard. This right there, this silence before the storm, this uninterrupted eye contact, might be one of the hottest moments you’ve experienced in a long time.

Chan is on you in a second, hoisting you up onto the desk as he kisses you deeply. Your hands grab for the hem of his t-shirt, greedily pulling it off to feel more of his skin. Chan’s meanwhile busy opening your bra, and in his impatience, he has to fumble for a bit to get it off you.

“Eager?” you tease against his lips before biting down, eliciting a groan from him. “You have no idea, baby girl,” he admits as he finally gets the offending garment off. He lets it carelessly fall to the floor, already focused on nothing else but your naked breasts resting against the palms of his hands. He kisses you deeply as he strokes your stiff nipples, his erection pushing against your scantily clothed pussy as he stands between your spread legs, trying to still be closer to you than he already is.

You cross your ankles behind him, helping him in his endeavour, and you both gasp as he grinds against you. “Off, off, off,” you breathe, gesturing to both his sweatpants and your underwear. Chan smirks. “Who’s eager now?” he asks, nipping at your collarbone. You roll your eyes playfully. “Who has written a song about fucking me?” He seems to consider that for a second. “Fair point. Move your hips for me, will you, baby girl?”

You help him pull your panties off and take the liberty of pulling down his sweatpants and underwear in one go, letting his girthy cock spring free. Chan appreciates the view for a second, seeing as you’re only wearing stockings now. “You’re the most attractive woman I’ve ever seen,” he declares in a raspy voice, and it only adds to your need. You make to touch him, but Chan easily catches your wrist and pins it to the desk with his hand. You actually whine at that. “Please, don’t tease me,” you beg, wanting nothing more than to feel his length stretching you out deliciously.

Chan’s smile is wolfish. “Don’t worry, baby, you’ll get what you want.” And before you can protest any more, he lets go of your hand, pulls you to the edge of the desk and guides his cock into your pussy. Your gasps mix with his broken moans as he slowly pushes in. Chan pauses, but only for a moment – both of you are far too turned on to take this slow, and even though the height of the desk isn’t perfect, the newness of the location adds a level of spice to the encounter.

He starts thrusting into you, fast, hard, causing the desk to shake beneath you. You scramble to push the keyboard to the side, falling back onto your elbows as Chan’s punishing pace throws you off balance. You stare up at him: his hair sticking to his forehead, a slight sheen of sweat glistening on his neck, the muscles in his arms playing as he holds onto your hips with a ferocity that might result in bruises. You give yourself over to your sensations: the cold desk below you, the sound of skin slapping against skin, Chan’s steady groans at the pleasure you give him, his big cock positively railing your wet cunt.

You grab onto him, pulling yourself back up and clinging to his broad shoulders, wanting to be even closer to him, feel his breath on your skin. “You feel so good,” you moan into his neck, biting his shoulder lightly. His retaliation comes in form of a thrust so powerful that it punches a loud groan out of you.

“Fuck, baby girl, you’re so hot, making me take you in my studio,” he gasps as he pushes into you again and again, relentlessly. “You’ll sound so good on this song, and it’ll be our little secret, but at the same time everyone will know. Everyone will know that only I can fuck you so well, make you make the hottest little noises, make you fall apart on my cock.” He slips a hand between you and starts stroking you to make sure the falling apart can actually happen, but he knows your body well enough to have you panting and at the edge of your orgasm within minutes.

“You’re such a good girl, making the most beautiful noises. Tell me, baby, who’s making you feel good? Say it. I want to hear it.” Pushing against him, trying to get closer to the delicious friction, you gasp, “You, Chan, only you can make me feel like this!”

You can feel Chan’s concentration slipping, his thrusts becoming sloppier, but he seems determined to make you come first, so he redoubles his efforts stroking you, whispering dirty nothings into your ear, how you’re a good little slut for him, taking him so well, how you’re made for this, made for him, how no other pussy could ever feel this good.

“Come on, baby girl, be good and moan for me and Hyunjin.” For some reason, that and a well-timed thrust does it, and you come on Chan’s cock with a loud, drawn-out groan, your pussy spasming wildly around him so he follows you over the edge mere seconds later. He crushes his lips to yours once more, and you make out as he spills into you, and continue to do so as you both slowly come off your highs.

A few moments later, you break the kiss to lean against his shoulder, still enclosed in his embrace. “That was a really nice entrée,” you declare, and Chan chuckles. He is quiet for a few seconds. “Are we gonna pretend you didn’t come the second I mentioned Hyunjin’s name?” You know he is teasing you, so you decide to go along. “Well, maybe you should invite him over some time?” Slowly, gently, you push against him so can slide out of you. You can feel a dribble of come making its way out of you and onto Chan’s desk, but that looks like a him-problem.

Chan clutches his chest in mock-terror. “Am I not enough for you?” You shake your head. “Oh baby, you’re sometimes more than I can cope with,” you say, pressing a kiss to his shoulder as you grab your underwear. “But in a good way. The best, really.” Chan slides an arm around you, stabilising you as you slip on your panties. “I’ll take it as a compliment, then.” He glances at the takeout bags. “Dinner?”

You nod. “Have you turned off the mic?” Your boyfriend turns around to check the equipment. He curses. “Oh naur, it seems like it was off the whole time!” He catches your eye as you slip on his t-shirt, and there is a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Guess we’ll have to do this again soon…”

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Dog days are over

Pairing: Elizabeth Olsen x Fem!Reader

Summary: Elizabeth isn’t a dog person… but you are. After the puppy interview, you try to convince your girlfriend to take one of them home.

Disclaimer: English is not my first language. It was inspired by the iconic puppy interview, obviously, but I changed the questions to fit the plot.

MASTERLIST

“Oh, my God,” you uttered at yourself under your breath, immediately bringing a hand to cover your mouth and stop a laugh from escaping as you watched the scene unfold in front of the cameras.

You were sitting behind the expensive equipment among the technical team while you all watched your girlfriend, Elizabeth, sitting in the middle of the room with several puppies surrounding her as she tried to answer the questions being thrown her way. It had been complete havoc since the start, something you had predicted when Elizabeth first told you she agreed with that interview - an internet success, which you had watched many other actors doing it before. However, Elizabeth kept her distance from most animals and you were waiting for the chaos that was going on right now.

What you didn’t expect was that a black puppy would jump to try to bite her hair and just fall on her chest, causing Elizabeth to squeak before she could stop herself. You had to hold your laugh the best you could so you wouldn’t disturb the recording, but you almost slipped when you saw your girlfriend trying to cover up her reaction by laughing and awkwardly scooping the puppy into her arms. You usually didn’t tag along to her interviews - especially because sitting behind the camera all day was boring as hell - but Elizabeth had asked you if you wanted to go with her and you didn’t think twice before saying yes. The reason? That scene right there. A slightly panicked Elizabeth holding an overly excited puppy who was waggling his tail and trying to lick her face.

Well, the fact that there were going to be cute puppies also convinced you to be there.

Elizabeth might not be used to being around animals like that, but you grew up surrounded by them. Since you were a small child, your family had a dog, which ended up coming home pregnant one day and the house was suddenly filled with eight other puppies. Your mother managed to give two of them to other family members before you started crying and screaming saying you didn’t want them to go, and that has been it. You grew up surrounded by dogs. When you left for college, you couldn’t adopt any dog since they took so much time, but you entered your dorm one day and found a black cat sitting on top of your computer, and that’s how you ended up with a new pet. The cat, unfortunately, was already a bit old and he ended up passing away a couple of years after you left college.

Since then, you hadn’t gotten any other pets because you lived in an apartment and had a demanding job that kept you away most of the time, but you loved going back to your parents’ house because they still had many dogs and some other animals - your father still hadn’t explained how they ended up with a tortoise, but you were fine with it.

So, yes, you were having the time of your life.

“Are you a cat person?” The question made by one of the interviewers brought your attention back to the scene in front of you.

When Elizabeth quickly replied with a short “nope” you laughed before you could stop yourself, but luckily you weren’t the only one since everyone else in the room shared the feeling. It also made Elizabeth laugh while she looked around at everyone else and struggled to get the black puppy with the blue collar out of her lap at the same time. Her eyes met yours for a brief second, something that made you smile softly even if you could see the silent ask for help behind her green eyes.

“Is it obvious I’m not a dog person?” Elizabeth wondered out loud with another laugh. “The way you said that like ‘so are you an any kind of animal person?’” She said, trying to sound like the woman asking her the questions. “Are you a bunny person?” She joked in the end, which only made everyone laugh again.

The dog in her lap finally gave up trying to lick her face and ran away to play with his little friends, and you saw how Elizabeth visibly relaxed, having a small break from the cute attackers for once. You were still smiling at her, unable to believe how cute your girlfriend was, when you felt something touching your feet. You looked down and saw that one of the puppies had run into you while playing with a toy and you didn’t think twice before leaning down to pet the cute dog. That was the puppy that seemed the most excited about Elizabeth since the beginning, jumping into her as soon as they saw her, and you received the same treatment as her. That made you smile even more widely and your eyes raised for a moment to see how your girlfriend was holding up before grabbing the toy from the floor to toss it away for the dog to chase.

You could have tossed it to the other side, you could have. Instead, you tossed it right on Elizabeth’s feet and then watched the puppy skid with the little paws to reach the toy. Elizabeth was answering a question you hadn’t heard, her attention away from the dogs, so when the puppy jumped on her again she yelped even louder than before in surprise at the sudden attack.

“Oh, God!”

You bit the inside of your cheek to hold another laugh, but you saw someone giving you a thumbs up for helping in getting that scene. You weren’t sure if your girlfriend realized it had been you who threw the toy at her, although you were praying she didn’t.

“I don’t have a dog,” you heard Elizabeth commenting with an awkward laugh when another puppy tried to get into her lap. She tried to move the first one, but he wasn’t having it, so she reached out for the toy to squeeze it. It was, obviously, the wrong choice because that only made all of the puppies rush to her to try to take it. “Okay, okay, okay…” She repeated the same word countless times while trying to dodge all of the dogs jumping on her and, finally, she threw the toy away, which made all of the puppies run away to get it. “I don’t remember what was the question.”

“You were telling us what are your hobbies,” the interviewer reminded her.

“Oh, yes.” Elizabeth nodded and opened her mouth to reply, only to be jumped by the puppy with the red collar again. She tried to move out of the way, but that only made the dog fall with his paws almost inside of her shirt. “You like the inside of my shirt, I see. You would get along with my girlfriend just fine.”

The laugh that resonated around the room was the loudest it has been since the start of the interview and, even if you were one of the people laughing, you still tried to make yourself look smaller in your chair when everyone turned to look at you. You felt yourself blush and you met Elizabeth’s gaze again just to shake your head at her little joke, but she just laughed and then had to avoid another jumping puppy from hitting her face.

“Since you talked about her,” the interviewer started, “can you tell us about how things are going? You recently moved in together, yes?”

“We did,” your girlfriend replied with a more contained smile. Elizabeth didn’t have a problem talking about you during her interviews - she knew it was going to happen when you both decided to go public about your relationship - but she tried to avoid giving out many details and always tried to change the subject as fast as she could. “People always say we only know who someone really is when you have to share a house with them,” she joked. “But things are going great. Aside from the occasional wet towel on the bed, there hasn’t been any trouble.”

The interview continued after that with the same level of chaos. The dogs kept jumping on her or running around like crazy, there was a poop incident and even a moment where you were sure Elizabeth was regretting putting herself in that situation, but she managed to answer the questions and all the dogs - and Elizabeth - were alive in the end, which you counted as a victory.

Once the questions were over, someone asked Elizabeth to stay in her spot for just a few more minutes while they collected the dogs to take them away again. You had gotten up from your chair since you felt like you needed to stretch a little bit and you were about to pull out your phone to check the time when you saw three of the puppies running towards you while fighting over a toy. Without thinking twice, you sat down on the floor and quickly reached for the toy.

“Hey, now, don’t fight!” You said. They all started to jump to try to get it from you and you felt your legs and arms being scratched with their little sharp nails, but you didn’t mind. It wasn’t their fault and, honestly, you were almost used to that. “Play nice, kiddos,” you asked before throwing the toy away.

To your surprise, not all the puppies rushed to get it. The black puppy with the red collar, that had been among them, decided he wanted to climb your lap instead and that’s what the dog did with his wobbly legs and waggling tail. You laughed happily as you decided to help him by picking him up and pressing him against your chest while you brought your other hand to scratch behind his ear.

“You’re so cute,” you cooed before pressing a kiss on top of his head. In return, the puppy raised his head to lick your chin and you let him do it. “Do you like me? I also like you, boy.” As soon as you said that, though, you paused and picked him up with both hands so you could hold him in front of your face. “Wait, are you a boy?” You turned him a bit to take a look and gasped when you put the dog back against your chest. “You’re a girl! No wonder you were trying to look at Lizzie’s chest!” You declared while trying not to squeeze the dog too much. “I don’t blame you at all for that!”

No one would be able to tell if you were joking or not since you were being so serious while saying that, but thankfully everyone was too busy trying to pick up the running dogs or putting the equipment away before the wires got chewed or something. You didn’t move from where you were sitting playing with the cute puppy and letting her lick your hands and face while all the other dogs were picked one by one to be taken away. You could already feel your chest tighten with the prospect of letting the black puppy go as well, even if it sounded crazy that you had gotten attached to her so fast.

Since you were too busy cuddling the dog, you missed when Elizabeth got up and walked towards you, getting startled when her voice sounded just by your side. “Why is he so calm with you when he was trying to murder me a second ago?”

You looked up and your lips quickly curled in a smile when you saw Elizabeth standing there with her hands on her hips while trying to pretend to be mad. “She wasn’t trying to kill you, babe,” you defended the dog. “She was trying to show you love!”

“That’s some aggressive love,” Elizabeth scoffed.

You laughed. “Yes, because she’s a puppy. She has too much energy. They get calmer when they get older.” Just as you said that, you raised the dog to your eye level again and kissed its snout. “Right, little princess? With a few walks and a lot of plays, you will grow up to be a lazy dog.”

As if she could understand you, the dog barked and tried to lick you again. You cooed and hugged her, but, before you could say anything else, a man approached you while chasing another puppy. You decided to help him out by reaching out with your arm to stop the puppy from running past you, but you still didn’t let go of the dog in your lap.

“Thank you,” the man said as he leaned down to scoop the dog.

“Of course,” you replied before you saw another person bringing a cage. “Where are these cuties from?” You wondered when curiosity got the best of you.

“From a shelter, ma’am,” the first man answered.

“Oh, so they don’t have a family?”

“No, ma’am. Their first event will be this weekend. The shelter organizes a fair to try to find their animals some owners.”

You made up your mind before the man was even done talking. You knew it was insane to even think about it, but you couldn’t help. The puppy in your arms had already won your heart, you couldn’t deny it. Besides, you have been working from home since you got a new job and you certainly had the money to take care of a pet. It could work out perfectly.

Elizabeth seemed like she had read your mind because, when you slowly turned your head to look back at her, she was already shaking her head. “Absolutely not.”

“Lizzie,” you tried to call out her nickname to soften her heart - exactly how you did it every time you were trying to get her to agree with something.

“No, Y/N.” Elizabeth kept her ground, firmly letting you know it was not going to happen. “We’re not taking a dog home with us.”

“But it’s not just a dog,” you complained while raising the puppy for her to see the cute little face. “It’s this little princess.”

“No,” she insisted. “No dogs. No little princess who tried to kill me either.”

“She didn’t try to kill you, I told you that,” you argued and then, because you could feel you were going to lose the argument, you went for your last weapon. A pout. “I promise you I will take care of her, you don’t even have to do anything! I will keep her fed and change the water, and take her for walks, and take her to the vet, all of it.”

“That’s not the problem, Y/N.” Elizabeth sighed. “I’m thinking about all of the mess. And the smell.” She added the last part while throwing a glance at the place where the puppies had pooped before, her nose scrunching adorably when she remembered the awful smell. “Look, I know you like animals, but we’re not getting a dog.”

“Lizzie,” you tried one more time, putting the dog down and pouting as well. It was now or never. “Pretty please? She won’t even get that big and we have so much space around the pool where she could run and play. We don’t need to let her go inside the house even.” Which you know was a little lie since you wouldn’t be able to keep the dog outside, but that was a problem you could solve later. “And I know you like animals, you just don’t… have much practice.”

“And I intend to keep that way.”

You sighed sadly at that and looked down at the dog who had gone oddly quiet during all of that conversation, as if she knew she shouldn’t interrupt. With a sniff, you leaned down to kiss the dog’s head before you let your cheek rest there. It was like saying goodbye to someone from your family.

“Oh, no, are you crying?” Elizabeth now sounded completely in panic, but you had your own emotions to deal with. You just shook your head, clearly lying since you could barely see anything after tears formed in your eyes, but you also didn’t want to seem stupid crying over it either. “No, my love, please don’t cry.” Elizabeth crouched in front of you and you briefly saw her wide green eyes staring at you like she had no idea what to do. “You can get a fish! What about that?”

“Okay,” you mumbled with a trembling voice without looking at her. You didn’t want a fish, although you couldn’t get enough energy to explain that to her. Besides, the lump in your throat wouldn’t allow you to form a phrase anyway.

“My love, please don’t be upset,” your girlfriend tried again, sadly this time. “I don’t like when you’re upset.” All you did was shrug. “I love you so much, my love, but-”

Before she could finish her explanation, the dog in your lap wailed so miserably that it made you hug her tighter and look at Elizabeth again.

Ironically, that’s what broke her.

Elizabeth closed her eyes and pinched her nose for a few seconds before she shook her head to herself. “I can’t believe I’m about to do this,” she whispered while staring at the ceiling above you and then she finally let out a sigh and looked at you. “Okay, fine, you can have the dog.”

“Oh, my God! Really?!” You didn’t wait for her confirmation. You just threw yourself at her, almost taking both of you to the ground, and started spreading kisses all over her face. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you…” you kept repeating it non-stop.

“Okay, okay.” She pushed you away when it became clear you wouldn’t stop anytime soon, just to raise her index finger while she started listing some rules that you both knew would eventually be broken. “The dog must stay outside, you will take full responsibility for it, you will have to figure out what to do when we decide to travel together, and the dog is gone if she ever causes a single leaf from my garden to break.” Then, Elizabeth turned her attention to the dog, pointing at the puppy and raising her eyebrows. “And I mean it.”

“Did you hear that, pup?” You asked the dog while pointedly ignoring what Elizabeth said. “You’re going home with us!”

The dog picked up on your happiness and started to jump in your arms while trying to lick both of you, but Elizabeth quickly moved away and got up. “God, it has been a second and I’m already regretting it.” Just when you were about to get worried she might change her mind, Elizabeth added: “Wait here, I will see what we need to do to take the dog home.”

“Wait, Lizzie,” you called her before she could take another step away and she turned around at you in expectation. “Come here.” She rolled her eyes, but did as you asked. “Closer.” Again. “Closer.”

“Only if I climb in your lap, but my seat has been taken.” Elizabeth glared at the dog, but you could see she didn’t mean anything by it.

You chuckled and raised your chin. Once again, your girlfriend rolled her eyes although she leaned down to give you a kiss. “I love you,” you whispered when she pulled away.

“You better,” Elizabeth replied with a huff.

“Really, I love you so much.” You pecked her lips one more time.

She sighed and kissed your forehead. “I love you too, my love.”

Elizabeth had just started to leave again when you asked: “Can we call her Wanda?”

“Don’t make me change my mind,” was the reply you got even if she didn’t even turn around to say it.

You only laughed and hugged the puppy again. You could convince her about the name too.

[softagenda]

pillow talk (multi)

rating: m+

drabble collection: moments with each LI in the sheets, told through intimate and vaguely sinister drabbles

originally posted on ao3

masterlist

Preview

You stared into the smoldering fire by the bed, amidst the sumptuous blankets and furs, from the prison of his arms, suddenly cold.

Leander

“And how does the magic happen,” you teased, now languorous and slightly drunk, your body aching pleasantly and cheek pressed to his bare chest.

“Give and take, beautiful.” His hand stroked along your back, tracing a swirling, winding pattern.The rings on his fingers brushed a cool kiss against your skin. “Sometimes, it’s a small thing: a free drink here, a favor there. For others, well… every debt must be repaid in equal measure.”

A handful of free drinks. A room at the inn. 

Information, knowledge of the city, a personal guide. 

Minutes - an hour now, altogether - holding your hand, resisting an ancient curse, a risk of incalculable value.

You stared into the smoldering fire by the bed, amidst the sumptuous blankets and furs, from the prison of his arms, suddenly cold. 

The tip of a finger dipped in the valley of your spine and drew a line up your back. As though he felt the slight stiffening of your body, his hand settled against the nape of your neck, his palm a hot, firm weight holding you to him. His thumb sat below your jaw, stopping over your pulse.

Leander rested his cheek against your head and pressed a kiss to your hair, the words drifting across your ear like the mist enshrouding the city.  “The only truth of this universe is this: nothing is free.”

_______________________________________

Kuras

Candlelight brought you from the shadows of your doze.

Blurrily, you nuzzled closer to the firm pillow by your face when the familiar scent of  magnolia - sweet, slightly citrus, earthy - filtered through your senses, alerting you like smoke in a barn.

Your eyes opened. 

The pillow was, in fact, a thick, muscled thigh covered in a layer of white cotton trousers. Following the leg upward, you took in the sight of Kuras in the dim,  flickering light of a single candle by the bedside. He held a book in his lap, one hand idly turning a withered page. A thin trail of smoke drifted into the dark beyond his shoulder.

Gold eyes met yours after a moment. Even in the deep night, they glowed brighter than the flame at his hip. 

He smiled indulgently. “Dawn will not break for  a few hours more. Sleep.” 

You stared at that smile, blinking heavily, clinging to wakefulness for just a little longer. A thought nudged at the fuzzy edges of your mind at the smile, the eyes - a thread of disquiet amidst the warm cocoon of blankets and his body.

Kuras lifted one hand and turned to the bedside table. A thin stick passed through the flame, the smoke blooming like petals from the stem, before magnolias perfumed into the air once more. 

As the scent wrapped around you, filled your lungs, soothed the voice at the back of your mind, a large hand cupped your cheek. His thumb caressed the corner of your eye before coaxing the lid shut and lingering there, gently holding.

“Sleep. I am here with you. I will watch over you.”

You slipped back into the night.

________________________________________

Ais

The soft bubbling of water woke you.

Your hand sleepily tugged the kimono over the bared edge of your shoulder. You’re curled into a ball beneath the thin fabric, legs fully tucked under the hem, hands curled against your chest, a tortoise sheltering from the cool, humid air drifting from the water’s edge.

Peering through the folds, you stared at the empty sheets next to your eyes adjusted to the night. Then, turning on your other side, you looked for him.

Glowing red eyes caught yours instantly.

He leaned against the open door. Moonlight painted his chest and shoulders pale silver, glinting sharp on the necklace that hung by his navel, his rings, his horns. A cigarette lingered by his mouth. As he drew another puff, embers burned and flared at the end.

“Want a hit?”

You sighed and rolled over on the bed, cheek pressed to the cold sheets. “No. Could use a drink though.” Your mouth felt dry, your belly hollow.

Ais held your gaze for a moment before releasing the smoke in a soft grin. He flicked the cigarette outside the door and strode over, bare feet silent on the creaking wood of the old pier.

At the edge sat a chalice. With two fingers, he hooked the rim, knelt by the red waters, and dipped it beneath the Seaspring.

The chalice full to the brim, spilling over his fingers, Ais took a seat on the bed and braced his arm over you. Several drops fell to the sheets; they wicked into the fabric, not fading to a blush but thickening like blood.

You glanced up from the stain to his face cast in shadow, the red gleam of his eyes thickening too, swallowing up his pupil..

“Drink up, sparrow.”

_____________________________________________

Vere

A claw traced delicately over the crown of your head before sinking into the length of your hair. He stroked as though petting a cat - idly, indulgently, reclined against the mountain of pillows on his bed and curled above you with his chin braced on his palm and bent elbow.

You laid there on the sheets, sweaty and panting, every nerve in your body vibrating, aching with the ghost of pleasure and pain. A sickly feeling sapped the strength from your body. The gold veins across your hands and arms felt hollow as scorched earth.

“Can’t catch a breath?” His voice curled with smug satisfaction, the smirk evident without needing to see for yourself.  “All that muscle and misery, with the stamina of a virgin.”

Craning your head back, you glared at Vere through the messy fringe of hair sticking to your face. His claws pricked the nape of your neck. You arched your back away from the bright points of pain and heat.

“Soon, I’ll have you trained to my tastes,” he mused, his gaze trailing down your bare body. “Enough to sate me, at the very least. It’d be troublesome to have you burn out too fast.” 

Fur brushed against your thighs and stomach. His thick, russet tail flowed over your body in a fiery river, the soft pelt tickling over your skin. Heat radiated from it, the ancient magic humming in his veins, less volatile now that he’d taken the edge off.

After one last teasing prick of claw, Vere reached down and lifted the length of chain pooled on the sheets. He slipped the end around your neck and pulled through. 

Then, with a rumbling sigh, he leaned back against the pillows and closed his eyes. “Wake me up before noon, and you’re lunch.”

With a flick of his hand, the candles extinguished. 

You stare at the dark ceiling, cold steel brushing your throat with every breath.

______________________________________

Mhin

A chill settled over your skin, casting your dreams in shades of winter. Goosebumps rolled down your arms in a wave. Subtle, heavy breaths disturbed the peace of the night.

Your eyes shot open.

The window gaped open. An autumn breeze stole inside, undulating against the curtains. Clear moonlight spilled across the floor, illuminating the toe of a boot and a pool of blood. A ghostly figure sat beneath the sil.

Heart pounding, you held still, squinting through your lashes, trying to see the face hiding within shadow.

Thick leather pants and bracers. Flowing white shirt. Midnight blue hood, hooked to the collar with silver rings. The light caught the edges of messy hair beneath the hood, shining in the gloom like frost across a frozen pond.

Your hand released its taught grip on the dagger beneath your pillow.

Wrapping the blankets around your body, you sat up and leaned across the mattress. “.... Mhin?”

White eyes with red pupils appeared within the shadowed face. 

You shuffled to the edge of the bed. Glancing at the blood, you asked, “are you injured?”

After a quiet moment, they slowly shook their head. Mhin folded one leg and braced their arm on their knee. In their hand was a silver dagger, twin to the one you’d hidden beneath your pillow. Fresh blood licked the edge of the blade.

“Are the bodies on the roof or the street?”

Finally, a spark appeared in their eyes. “Strung them up like gargoyles.” 

You huffed a laugh. Fresh corpses lured Soulless like flies to honey. They’d never. “How thoughtful of you to help decorate for Leander’s party tomorrow.”

Mhin shot you a weary look that clearly spelled the fuck do you think, before their head dropped back on the wall with a soft thud. The bruises beneath their eyes were dark as plums. They’d never slept soundly, but since the attacks had started, a few good hours had dwindled into a half hour here and there at best.

You considered chiding them for a moment before sighing and rising from the bed. Scooping the quilt from the bed, you shuffled over and dropped down to the floor next to them.

“What are you doing,” they grumbled, frowning when you leaned into Mhin’s side. 

Heedless of the blood wicking into the sheets, you spread the bedcovers across their lap and yours before gingerly resting your head on their shoulder. 

Mhin sucked in a breath. “You’re not actually going to sleep like this?” When you only closed your eyes, they growled, “Ridiculous.”

Minutes passed. Then, “I’ll shove you off the second another wave hits. You realize that, right?”

You kept silent. Beneath the sheets, you found their hand and covered the back with your palm, fingers webbing through the gaps between theirs,  hoping to warm them.

“Your back’s going to hurt like hell tomorrow.” 

Then slowly, as the night and their body next to yours filled you with a sense of safety, their grip tightened on your fingers.

A smile slipped across your mouth as you drifted off to sleep once more.

_____________________________

a/n: ending on a fluffy note - comments and likes are appreciated!

[gothamslostboy]

Can i request bones characters and their pets headcannons?

OMG YES OF COURSE YOU CAN

Brennen

She’s against pets in general but if she had to pick one she’d choose a monkey

But after researching it and realizing she doesn’t have the adequate amount of time to care for one she lets booth get a dog

Has to be one that’s known for its intelligence tho

Booth

A dog man through and through

Specifically a high energy breed he can take for runs

Also likes to play fetch with it

Teaches it tricks

Constantly gets lectures from Brennen every time he says they have the smartest dog

Wants to let it lay in the bed but Brennen says no

He sneaks the dog up after she goes to sleep sometimes

Wendell

I bet you’re thinking dog huh?

Yeah you’re right

He has a American pitbull terrier he adores

Buys her sweaters for the winter

Takes her out to those dog friendly restaurants to play with Booth’s dog while they hang out

Cam

Cat lady 100%

Either a Siamese or a hairless cat

Spoils it with toys and treats, but makes sure it stays at a healthy weight

When no one is around she speaks to it in a baby voice

Arastoo

A cat he found at his local shelter

He doesn’t know what kind of cat it is

Has to take allergy pills because he developed an allergy after he already was attached

Sweets

A hermit crab he keeps in his office

Gets an artist friend to paint new shells based on sci fi movies he likes

Before he picked a name he was calling it buddy, which just kinda stuck

Angela

Likes many animals, but not keeping them

Only got one after Michael-Vincent kept begging

Ended up getting a hedge hog

It curls up in her lap while she paints or draws

Hodgins

Has the hedgehog with Angela obviously

He lets sit on his shoulder when relaxing

Built it a fucking MASSIVE enclosure in their house

This lil thing has so much to play with it’s insane

After a year or two of owning the hedgehog, he convinces Angela to get a tortoise

Who he also spoils

Zack

He bought a beta fish one day bc he thought a pet would make him less lonely but he was scared of all the other species at the pet store

He named it Archimedes

Originally just had it in a glass bowl

Bought it a proper tank after Hodgins explained how bad that is

Hodgins also went with him to pick out things it could hide in

Daisy

Honestly I’m not really sure

Maybe a hamster when she was young

But never got another pet after it died bc she was so sad

Loves Lance’s little hermit crab though

Says hi to it every time she stops by his office

Fisher

An iguana

He brought him into work once and cam made him put it in Hodgins’ bug room

Takes it for walks

It wears a black spiked collar with its leash

Vincent

He has two ferrets and and a set of Guinea pigs

Talks to them for hours telling them all the facts that pop into his head

Carries the ferrets around his body (neck, shoulders, arms, etc)

Talks about them like they are his human children

[thewhimsyturtle]

I made it to the top of Knee Mountain!

But how do I get down?

[bwabys-scenarios]

I love wholesome Kurapika! If he and Darling were to ever get a pet together what kind do you think he'd prefer? Horse, bird, cat, etc

Kurapika is definitely a cat and dog person. He’d probably prefer a cat though, they’re low energy and don’t make too much noise.

When picking out the cat, he’d prefer looking in shelters or even rescuing a stray off the street. It’s more likely for the two of you to randomly adopt a stray that you’ve both been feeding than to proactively go to adopt a cat.

And I hate to inform you if this, but the cat will absolutely love Kurapika more than you. He’s not even at your shared apartment enough for the cat ri like him that much!!

Kurapika is on missions more often than he’s home, so why the hell does the cat adore him so much?! Well, animals adore good Hunters… and you love Kurapika with your whole heart too, so you can’t blame the feline for having a preference that you share.

You find yourself walking into Kurapika’s study when he’s home to see him looking over plans while absentmindedly petting your cat. He’ll scratch under its chin, pet behind its ears and down its back as he crosses out something and scribbles down a phone number or address.

Then your boyfriend is up and kissing your cheek, leaving for a meeting with an informant, leaving both you and the cat to mourn his absence.

If you were to get a dog it would be something big. Kurapika would get it because he’s paranoid about your safety and wants a big scary dog for your security, but the pup ends up being an absolute sweetheart that couldn’t hurt a fly.

Although it’s a large dog, it nearly crushes you both attempting to lounge in your laps, often causing Kurapika to scold it. Though the blonde feels bad when it looks up at him with those puppy eyes… he’s not a good trainer, he’s too soft.

I also think Kurapika would like having a snake or some kind of reptile as a personal pet that he keeps in his room! This entirely depends on you and how comfortable you are with having that in your home though!

He would not like a bird, any kind of rodent, or turtles/tortoises. They’re just too messy, smelly, and/or loud. He especially dislikes hamsters. They’re so cute, but don’t make great pets in his personal opinion.

Overall he’s not really a pet sort of guy, the animal will be your responsibility since he’s gone most of the time, but when he’s around he’ll take over and give it plenty of care and affection. So just know that if you get a pet you’ll be the main caretaker since Kurapika is a very busy guy.

[blorbocedes]

WHY MUST CHEATCO FANS BE SO ANNOYING

"#birdoutrenniein" "checo would have been p2 if not for the fia's british bias" "lando deserves to celebrate alone for shittalking another driver" "he had to fight charles it's not his fault he's not p2" "red bull sabotages his car"

IT ISN'T BIRD'S OR THE FIA'S FAULT CHEATCO IS DRIVING ONE OF THE MOST DOMINANT CARS IN F1 HISTORY AND STILL CAN'T CATCH UP TO AND OVERTAKE A MCLAREN THAT HAS THE STRAIGHTLINE SPEED OF A TORTOISE.

WHY ARE YOU ALL BRINGING CHARLES INTO THIS. IT IS NOT HIS FAULT THE "TYRE WHISPERER" FORGOT TO WHISPER TO HIS TYRES WHILE BATTLING HIM.

WHAT YOU CALL SHITTALKING IS ACTUALLY JUST THE TRUTH. LANDO WAS CORRECT, NO LIES DETECTED WHEN HE SAID OBVIOUSLY MAX AS A DRIVER MAKES A DIFFERENCE BECAUSE THE RED BULL WOULD NOT LOOK DOMINANT AT ALL IF TWO CHEATCOS WERE DRIVING IT.

WAS RED BULL SABOTAGING HIS CAR LAST YEAR WHEN HE WAS IN GRAVEL TRAPS AND WALLS ALL ON HIS OWN? DOES MERCEDES SABOTAGE GEORGE RUSSELL'S CAR ON LAST LAPS? DOES MCLAREN SABOTAGE NORRIS' CAR ANY TIME A WIN IS POSSIBLE?

INSTEAD OF BLAMKING BIRD AND LECLERC AND NORRIS AND VERSTAPPEN AND RED BULL AND THE FIA, THEY NEED TO COME TO TERMS WITH THEIR FAV BEING MID. MAYBE AUDI WILL SEE SOMETHING APPEALING ABOUT CHEATCO. I DO NOT. THAT MAN NEEDS TO GO AND TAKE THE DELUSION WITH HIM WHEN HE FUCKS OFF TO NASCAR.

are you having a stroke

[lymoncat]

AOT HCS MODERN AU! What pet you guys own

Eren-

he has a dog I’m not even gonna lie, he comes across as a dog person, he doesn’t care what breed but prefers big dogs specifically German shepherds he bought a dog when y’all moved in together and he’s actually really close with the dog, you named the dog bobo you chose the name cuz you thought it would be cute, the dog is very attached to eren

armin-

a cat, an orange tabby cat. Armin comes across as a more calm less crazy person meaning he would want a cat to chill and read with. He named the cat tangerine cuz it’s orange. You bought him the cat for Christmas one year since you didn’t know what to get him. It’s the wholesome moments, when you see him on the couch after work holding the cat, you fall in love all over again with your gentle small ray of sunshine

Jean-

you may think that he has a horse but your very wrong, he has an annoying green parrot that calls you mom, you can simply walk by the change and you’ll hear “food mom?” And you eventually get used to it and get another parrot for them to play together and stop bugging you

connie-

oh you poor unfortunate soul, him and that tortoise. Jk he has a dog still, you poor unfortunate soul, him and that dog do everything together, he has a border collie that joins you two in everything, taking a shower, the dog is at the door, using the bathroom?, the dog is staring into your soul, trying to leave? The dog is following you out the door. The dogs same is bacon cuz the dog loves bacon

Reiner-

Bull dog off the bat, he has a big dog strong like him, they wrestle on the living room floor all the time, go on walks, play fetch, chase little kids- wait- what?! Yeah, they think it’s funny to chase children in the park especially the snotty teenager brats over in the corner doing some not so innocent things, the dog is a female named Presley very energetic and playful but don’t expect any unwanted visitors there will be none, middle of the night a robber comes ain’t no way that person getting out alive, maybe in a body bag but not alive.

Bertholdt-

a tortoiseshell cat with gold eyes, you guys went to an animal rescue center for your anniversary and he fell in love with this cat, he was begging you until you said yes I mean how could you not?! He’s batting those pretty green eyes while on his knees with the cat “please can we get her? I’ll do anything my love” it was a yes in that very moment and next thing you knew you were on your way home with a cat named pineapple don’t bother asking how that name came across his mind but it’s always nice to see him in one of his weird sleeping positions with pineapple splayed across his chest on her back

Erwin-

a lazy pug named Mr. There’s no question just a fat lazy pug that sheds buckets of fur.

Levi-

you begged him to get an animal and he kept saying no until he came home to you having bought one without his permission, he glared and looked pissed until that fat fluffy black cat looked him in the eyes with her emerald ones. He caved in. The cat was named jasmine and he allowed you to keep it because cats are very hygienic and easy to take care of. He hates changing the litter box but will do it for Jasmine. And when he does actually sleep it’s curled up with you and jasmine and absolutely precious, jasmine sits on his lap when he’s doing work and he shares his food with her all of the time strangely enough she loves lettuce, you’ll be in the kitchen making salad and she’ll prance over and sit there meowing for lettuce

I hope you guys liked this, please comment your thoughts and send me requests and don’t be afraid to give me feedback ❤️✨

[aquanutart]

I absolutely LOVE the Squirtle/Wartortle illustrations by kantaro in Pokemon 151!

The Squirtle jumping so joyfully from the rock into the ocean, the colors are STUNNING! I love the contrast of the Squirtle's aqua blue framed in the vivid orange sky, the soft bit of blue reflecting in its shell and its tail just catching the sun, how little and squishy its body looks as it launches itself towards the water with such tremendous excitement!

The lineless style of the background gives me the feel of a travel poster and I sense the tropical environment around it from the rocks and trees framing the corners, the waterfall splashing with as much energy as the Squirtle!

The layered blues on the surface of the water and the bubbles rising at the corner make me FEEL the liquid rising to meet the Squirtle--I can just feel how the next moment it's going to break through and be immersed in a cool island swim!

And the Wartortle running along the sunset beach, this is somehow everything I always imagined for Wartortle! I adore the way the rich purple melts into the warm red/orange sky, the matching purple clouds and shadows in the foreground, and how the dimming sunlight glows red on Wartortle's deep blues!

I love how the yellow and orange of the sky illuminate the lapping waves, I can just feel the gentle motion of the sea at dusk. The aqua color of the ocean matches Wartortle's ears and tail and sets off the red-orange sand, I just love how the colors are here!

Wartortle looks so round and squishy, I love its happiness as it goes frolicking through the shallows, chasing the bubbles caught in the setting sun! The shine and deep shadow on its shell give it an almost jewel texture like real tortoise shell; I love the silhouetted splash Wartortle leaves as it goes running across the shore. It's so full of energy and delight at the end of a gorgeous day! The colors in these are SO vivid and harmonized and the style is so cute and bursting with energy and joy. I just LOVE it (also Squirtle is my starter)

[hmshermitcraft]

wels x grian || theme: pets || extra: autistic wels (bc im projecting)

“Would you like to get a cat?”

“No. They smell.”

“Oh.” Grian was taken aback by Wels’ bluntness. He knew his partner wasn’t being mean on purpose, but Grian was still getting used to the matter of fact way Welsknight preferred to communicate.

Wels turned around to Grian once he finished sewing a banned back together. “We do live in seperate bases, love. You can get yourself a cat.”

“What about a dog?” Grian chirped happily. He knew Wels liked dogs, he loved playing with their friends’ pet dogs.”

“No, no, they shed too much. Grian, please listen, if you want any pets you can get however many you want, I just don’t want to live with any right now.”

“What… but you look after everyone else’s dogs all the time!” Grian was growing exasperated with his partner.

“Grian, listen to me.” Wels snapped, stepping closer to Grian and leaning over him. “I don’t want a pet like a dog or cat because they are very overwhelming for me to have around all of the time. All the time I spend looking after other hermit’s pets is organised, planned and outside of my home. If you want a pet, then get yourself a pet. I can come and help look after it with you but I do not want to live with a pet.”

Grian frowned, “You don’t get it.”

Wels sighed and sat down, letting Grian come and sit in his lap. “What am I not understanding, Grian? You know I am not good at reading between the lines.”

“I want us… to move in together, and I want us to have something to look after together.”

“Why didn’t you just say that, prince?”

“I…” Grian went red with embarrassment, “I don’t know.” He started to cry, but also burst into laughter. “This was so silly, I don’t know why I can’t just say things straight up rather than dancing around the issue.”

Wels sighed light heartedly, “I don’t know either.” He chuckled and pressed a kiss to Grian’s forehead. “So, you want to move in together? And get some kind of a pet?”

“…yes. If you’re ok with that.”

“Hmm… I think we can make it work.”

And so they did. They spent a few months getting their shared home sorted and moved into, including a house warming party with all the hermits, and there they finally landed on the perfect pet for them.

“Morning, Bowser.” Wels grinned down at their baby tortoise who was just waking up and walking over to lay under his heat lamp. “How did you sleep?” the tortoise made a quiet squeak in response, “Sounds nice. I’ll get you some breakfast, Bowser.”

A tortoise was their perfect pet. He was weirdly very nice to hold, which was a shock to Grian, and he was almost as introverted as Wels himself. The three of them would often sit in silence, Bowser on their large desk while Wels sewed and Grian drew up building plans.

Grian had never expected a tortoise to be such a good pet, but he had been willing to compromise for Wels and… maybe he loved Bowser even more than Wels, considering he showed off pictures of him to other hermits like a proud dad.

-🌻

Grain likes to tease Wels by comparing him to the turtle. They both have their protective shells, and they enjoy lounging around in the warm sun. It makes sense that he's perfect for Wels. And if he's perfect for Wels, then he's perfect for Grain too!

It taught them some important lessons for communicating with each other as well, and they still use the things they've learnt now! Wels has gotten better at figuring out when Grian is inadvertently speaking around what he wants, and tells him so. Grian has gotten better at just saying what he wants.

Neither of them have gotten better at not spoiling Bowser, though... The most pampered tortoise there is.

[silverynight]

I'm drawing up what I think the Hashira and Tanjirou's pups would look like. But I already have their names and personalities done.

Giyuu's Daughter: Eimi (影美): Meaning “Ocean” Age: 11

A calm, mature, and sweet girl who takes her task as the eldest seriously, much like her Mommy Tanjirou. She tries to keep a close eye on her younger siblings and keep them from overwhelming their parents, as well as help around the headquarters and home whenever she can. She tries to follow her mommy's ways of helping out those who need it. Though Eimi wishes her sire was more sociable.

2. Kyojuro's Daughter: Rie (りさ): Meaning "One whose laughter is like the sun" Age: 10

An excitable and playful little ball of flame that adores her family and learning how to cook for her father. Rie is always looking at the bright side of everything and can never have a negative thing to say to anyone. When she's not helping her Nee-Chan and Mommy care for the younger pups, she's learning new recipes to make for her father's huge stomach.

3. Tengen's Son: Habiki(はびき): Meaning "Sound" Age: 9

This boy is truly his father's son. A rebellious young (wannabe) shinobi, who tends to practice his ninja skills on his siblings, his parents, any other suspecting target EXCEPT his darling Mommy. He gets A LOT of timeouts. Habiki tries to follow his sire's way of flashiness. He's not quite there yet, but he'll get there.... eventually.

4. Shinobu's Son: Jiro(次郎): Meaning: "Second Son" Age: 8

The most intelligent of the pups. Seeing how his mother helps out so many people with her medicine, Jiro can't help but be inspired to learn medical science. Constantly studying herbs and remedies, as well as reading literature books in his spare time. Jiro often talks more like an adult than a child, due to his large vocabulary. Aside from his siblings, other pups don't really interact with him.

5. Gyomei's Son: Goro(五郎): Meaning "Enlightened Son" Age: 7

Born with terrible eyesight, Goro walks around with his eyes closed the majority of the time. Though he is not the oldest, Goro already towers over all his brothers and sisters. He's basically almost the same height as his Aunt Nezuko. Goro is quiet and likes to listen to everything around him. Although he won't hesitate to use his height to intimidate anyone who messes with the people he loves. Will sit on Gyomei's lap while he meditates, even have Tanjirou sit with him.

6. Iguro's Daughter: Kameko (亀甲): Meaning “tortoise-child” Age: 6

A timid child with Tanjirou's gift of talking to animals. Especially reptiles. One of the few people not put off by her sire's scars and loves to cuddle and chat with Kaburamaru whenever she's sleepy. She does hide her ability from people outside her family as not to be ostracized. Kameko is more comfortable interacting with animals than people, with the exception of her family.

7. Mitsuri's Son: Gohan(悟飯): Meaning "cooked rice’ or ‘meal of any sort" Age: 5

Fiercely protective of his Kameko-Nee. Has a black hole for a stomach. Loves going to different restaurants with his Mama Mitsuri and trying all different types of food. Believing that the more he eats, he'll be as strong as her! Strong enough to keep his siblings and Mommy safe! Gohan's a growing boy after all.

8. Sanemi's Daughter: Satsujin(殺人): Meaning "Murder" Age: 4

A feral little albino girl who bites people to assert her dominance. Often ridiculed because of her appearance, Satsujin has a low tolerance for bullies and insults. Be it towards her or her family. But she gets in trouble often with the people she bites. Tanjirou scolds her for resorting to violence, (and Sanemi for encouraging her), but calms her down afterwards.

9. Muichiro's Twin Son and Daughter: Niko (二湖): Meaning "Two Lakes" Nao(なお): Meaning "Docile" Age: 3

Niko is alert and hyper-focused while her twin brother is sluggish and has a case of narcolepsy. Nao would end up bumping and falling into a lot of things, if not for his twin sister and his Mommy to keep his eyes open. Niko has always got her eyes on her brother, to keep him safe and secure.

10. Kyojuro's Son: Yinjuro (No meaning. Just following the naming pattern of Rengoku's family) Age: 8 months

Just a cute chubby baby, who loves being carried around by his Mommy and older siblings. Also, enjoys his Uncle Senjuro rocking him to sleep.

Sweet pups that are very much loved by Mommy Tanjirou and all their Dads and Moms. 💕