#like if someone has an opinion you hate maybe simply just stop looking at what they post

[savannahsdeath]

hi i love your writing SO MUCH and idk if i requested this already but… do you think we can get a brothers best friend ellie?? readers brother DOES NOT want them together but they end up fucking when he’s asleep/not home. or reader goes to ellies house and eats her out while shes on call with reader’s brother?? either one is fine i would just love to see you write it

i think you requested that but i made it likee the brother didnt care so heres a second one🤭ill post the first one too tho!!

BBF!ELLIE WILLIAMS X READER

mdni please<3

warnings: 18+!! smut, almost getting caught

writers note: im sorry its so short whateva💔

You couldn't decide whether you like it or not.

Well, of course you did. Ellie never failed to make you feel good, her strap hitting all the right places while her hands caressed your thighs. She was rough, but not too rough. Degrading, but also praising. Basically, she was all you could ever ask for and more. What was there to hate?

But at some point, there was this little voice in your head telling you you're pathetic. Pathetic for liking this, agreeing to this and... just admiring her overall.

Because, jesus, 'she's my brother's friend. Best friend. What am I going to tell him?'

You, as the little sister, always let him insult you. Your opinion didn't matter, you gave up on trying to be important long time ago. You didn't hate him, he wasn't that bad. It was just sibling love language. He just couldn't be nice. If he knew about you and Ellie...

You were good at hiding it, though. When you first met her, you didn't believe she's really friends with your brother. Not to be mean, but you didn't thought he'll get along with someone who seems so... perfect.

'She probably has a shitty personality.'

That's how you explained their friendship. And you were terribly wrong.

After she visited your house once, she kept coming almost every day. At this point, you got used to that.

Oh, well, not exactly... There was some awkward situations, like when you exited the bathroom in only a towel wrapped around your bare skin and you saw her leaning against the handrail in the hallway. She only ruffled your hair and laughed at your embarrassment, seeing you blush and holding onto the fabric like your life depended on it. Maybe it did, actually?

It wasn't long after that before you began to wonder -'She can't be friends with my brother... can she?'- You started to notice more things - her kindness towards you, a tender touch here and there, and the way she looked at you made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. So what if she was his best friend? Would he really mind?

But what if he did? What if he found out?

Suddenly that little voice in your head was screaming louder than ever, and that feeling of shame and guilt crept up on you again.

But no matter how much of the guilt you felt, and despite the small voice in your head telling you you're pathetic, it felt right. You felt accepted. Accepted by someone who was perfect in every way. The thought of telling your brother filled you with dread, but it seemed so far away. You could figure out that little problem later, right? Just for now, you could feel a rush of emotions - mostly guilt, but also a rush of lust that made you want more.

More and more.

And she gave you more.

A quiet -'fuck'- escaped her lips as she saw your cunt throbbing against her strap. Her hands continued firmly holding you down as you didn't even bother to stay quiet. You felt so good... and so ashamed... You wanted it to stop but at the same time, you knew you'd beg for more if she would even simply slow down.

It was really your own fault.

This was the first time in ages you were left home alone, so you immediately invited Ellie over. First time you won't have to bury your face in the pillows. First time she won't have to shush you. First time you could actually do everything.

You were fighting your own thoughts, not knowing which one are the bad ones. You had no idea if you're doing the right thing. And you most definitely weren't but you were too fucked up to realize that.

Ellie chuckled, hearing your not-muffled this time sounds. "Were you always this loud? Jesus, how did we manage to keep this a secret for so long?"

The truth is, she wasn't silent herself. Fine, she wasn't a whining mess, unlike you, but still - the little 'fuck's and praises escaping her mouth weren't too quiet.

You continued squirming and whimpering about how big she is and how much it hurts, hoping it'll magically change, though you didn't really wanted it to. Or maybe you did? You weren't sure. Your mind continued the fight wether it's good or pathetic, none of the sides prevailing.

She clicked her tongue in disappointment, but her smirk told you how proud she really is. "I know, I know, so stop moving so fucking much." She said.

Her raspy, tired voice was enough to make you squirm again. You weren't used to hear it in these circumstances before, since it's obviously the first time she could speak loudly and clearly, without worrying about your brother.

"I said something, doll." Her grip on your hips hardened, almost aggressively pinning you to bed.

You heard the ring hanging near the door, meaning someone opened them. Just by footsteps you could tell it was your brother.

"Should I stop?" She asked with mock-concern and interest. You realized your answer won't change anything - maybe just the intensity of her moves, so you didn't waste your energy answering. That was a sign of your obedience and helplessness Ellie waited for. "Good girl."

She rolled you on your stomach and tangled her fingers in your hair, pressing your head into the pillow. She shoved it down with every thrust - every hit of your climax - to stop you from moaning. And of course it didn't work completely, but they faded enough to be inaudible outside the room.

She was intentionally going faster and faster. She loved playing with you, feeling the thrill of it, even though you didn't find it so amusing. You digged your nails into the tattoo on her forearm, hoping to slow her down.

"Ya know what will happen if he hears?" She didn't seem to care that your fingers were literally drawing blood from her body. "You'll handle it. Unless you want him to find out?" She whispered.

You immediately shook your head, pursing your lips and squeezing your eyes shut.

Then, your moment of focus broke as you heard knocking, on the door to your room this time.

"I'm back!" Your brother announced.

You asked him to tell you whenever he goes out or cames back, mostly so you knew if Ellie's free, since he only goes out with her. Today was the first time he went outside on his own and the poor guy had no idea she found a reason to visit your house anyway, just like he had no idea she did so even when he was home, in his room, right above yours.

The lack of response surprised him, so he knocked once more before shouting confused -'You there?'

Ellie looked down at you, daring you to answer, mouthing silent 'go on' in the most taunting voice she could.

"Yes! That's good!" Your voice was shaky and you knew he will notice.

He wasn't really caring, just curious, so he had to know everything. His first sentence sounded cute, like he really cared, but you figured out he's making fun of you as soon as you heard the other questions. "Are you crying? What, you weren't invited to some lame party? Or a boy you know for a week broke up with you?"

And what were you supposed to say? -'No, your best friend is fucking me for... probably more than an hour now, and her dick is probably bigger than yours, so I can't control my tears'

"Yeah, something lik- Oh, fuck off!" You screamed back, succeeding to pretend you're really hurt because of one of the pathetic things he accused you for.

He laughed. "Mhm- Whatever!"

The footsteps climbed up stairs and got silent. Ellie bit her bottom lip, holding back a chuckle.

"Does he really think of you so low?" Her hips slowed down again, but became more precise. "You did good, don't worry. It'll be over soon."

[miumura]

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 — TEN THINGS I HATE ; JAY FIC

“ I’ll do better, if you stay with me like this. ”

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ where jay keeps a journal where he documents all the reasons he hates you, his rival. despite claiming he will forever hate you, keeping this journal only makes him realize his feelings for you.

PAIRING rival!jay x gn!reader

GENRE angst, fluff — WARNINGS jealousy ; overthinking !

WORD COUNT 1.7K+ (1730)

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ soph strikes again!! angst cb, did we cheer?? anyways i was in the feels okay 😢 listening to music while writing really unlocks something in ur brain im telling you…idk what really went thru my mind when making this but enjoy 😊🫶

#1 – HOW YOU’RE GOOD AT EVERYTHING.

Is it normal to have a journal dedicated to someone you hate? Whatever, I just need to get this off my chest. Whenever you’re involved, it’s like I could have nothing I want. It’s stupid, but I don’t care, it just pisses me off when you easily follow instructions, perfect things on your first try, and get all the awards I wish to have. I admit, jealousy consumes me. It's frustrating how effortlessly you seem to achieve anything you want without even trying. Seeing your achievements plastered all over the school only intensifies my anger, making me wish I could tear your posters into shreds. I've never despised second place more than now. Why can't I find contentment with my own scores or position, just like you? How can I remove you from my life and find peace within myself?

#2 – HOW CHEERFUL YOU ARE.

How is it possible for someone to remain so happy throughout the entire day? I can't help but wonder if you possess some magical influence over my friends, as they seem to shower you with compliments non-stop. It's weird to hear nothing but praise for you while I find myself complaining about various things. It's almost as if nobody comprehends why I harbor such animosity towards you, and this frustrates me immensely. Every time I express my emotions, they tell me to laugh and smile more, as if I don't already do it enough. But then, when I contemplate your cheerful and positive demeanor, it becomes clear why they encourage it. You're like the epitome of a model student everyone aspires to be, while I remain the perpetually angry and stubborn person. No wonder everyone wants to spend time with you, and perhaps that's one thing I can agree with others on.

#3 – YOU LIKE THINGS THAT I LIKE.

It's almost like a curse that we share the same interests. It's the reason I keep encountering you everywhere. Whatever I do, you seem to be there, expressing your fondness for the same things with your friends. It's frustrating, and I can't help but roll my eyes at the thought of encountering you even more. Even listening to music has become a challenge, as I know you like the same artists. I purposely skip their songs because they only remind me of you, and I hate being consumed by thoughts of you. I yearn to stop learning more about you so that I can enjoy the things I like in peace, without these constant reminders of you.

#4 – YOU MAKE ME OVERTHINK.

Maybe because of how perfect you seem to be in other’s eyes, I wonder how I look in other people’s eyes too. Am I that awful to hang out with? Am I always seen as this angry person who hates everyone? I’m not that, I know that–my friends do as well. But others? I’m not so sure about that. What confuses me even more is why you persist in wanting to spend time with me despite any perceived flaws or stubbornness on my part. You could easily choose to be with other people who might seem better to converse with. Yet, you continue to stick around, refusing to give up on our “friendship”. And because of this, I can see how others might form a negative opinion about me. My constant push to keep you away could be misunderstood, leading people to believe I'm simply a horrible person.

#5 – YOU LIKE ME.

I'm not sure if you have romantic feelings for me, but I can tell that you consider me a friend. It's interesting because I hadn't thought of you in that way before, but it doesn't seem to bother you. Today, you stood up for me, and it felt really heartening. Normally, I might have felt angry or vulnerable when someone defends me, but this time it was different. I don’t know, it just did feel really nice. Your quick response in telling those people to stop was captivating, even though I didn't express my gratitude at the moment. Lately, I've been struggling with the loud voices in my head, and sometimes I wonder if you could help quiet them too. But now, I'm not sure what I'm trying to convey. You confuse me a lot.

#6 – YOU GIVE THE WRONG PEOPLE SECOND CHANCES.

The other day, I saw you in tears because someone had broken your heart. I must admit, I was taken aback because I had never seen you sad or upset before. It was quite a contrast to the cheerful version of yourself that I'm familiar with. What happened to you that everyone sees all the time? I hope you had someone to tell you your problems too, as it’s not easy for someone who is your rival to be comforting you. I didn’t, so I hope you went home that night filled with less worries because you have someone to talk with.

What surprised me even more was that the very next day, you gave the person who hurt you a second chance. I can't help but wonder why you keep allowing people to hurt you when it's likely they'll repeat the same behavior, ultimately affecting your radiant smile. Stop going back to the people that hurt you once, it’s only going to be a cycle. I wish I could share these thoughts with you, but I hesitate because I doubt you'd take them to heart coming from someone like me. However, I can't help caring despite my own imperfections. It's puzzling to me as well, as you make me feel oddly connected to your feelings.

#7 – SEEING YOUR TEARS.

I never imagined how much I could despise seeing someone cry until the moment I witnessed your tears. Ever since that day, I always thought about it, so how could I let it slip out of my mind this time? I’m sorry for yelling at you today. I’m sorry for saying I hate you. I didn’t mean it, I was just extremely frustrated today, and not at you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I know how saying this won’t do anything, but I truly mean it. I wish I could rewind time once I saw water fill up in your eyes, but what’s done is done. You made me realize something crucial—that I've always seen you as a rival, whereas you only wanted to be friends with me. I allowed my competitive nature to ruin our chances of a meaningful connection. I fear now that you might avoid me, and I understand if you do. I worry that I might continue to hurt you, just like the people you often encounter, who don't treat you with the kindness you deserve. You deserve better than that, and I'm sorry for contributing to your pain.

#8 – GIVING ME ANOTHER CHANCE.

I never imagined we'd get another chance after what happened. I tried avoiding you, genuinely attempting to keep my distance. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't resist reaching out to talk to you again. It's almost as if we both sensed the need to address the situation, leading us to have that important conversation. I still don’t know why you gave me another chance. Did I not say hurtful things to you? How easily are you able to put that behind? Your ability to forgive and move past it leaves me in awe.

It's making me reflect on my own flaws, especially how I tend to hold grudges and struggle to let go of negative feelings. I can't quite comprehend how you do it, but you make me think about you more than ever before. Every word I speak now feels like it needs to be carefully considered, thanks to your presence in my thoughts. Your gesture of offering another chance touched me deeply and brought a smile to my face. I can't help but wonder what you've done to influence me in this way. I think you really did something to me.

#9 – FEELINGS, FEELINGS, FEELINGS.

We've connected much faster than I anticipated, even surprising my friends. I'm left wondering what you've done to me. You've become an all-encompassing thought – your smile, your laughter, your sense of humor – everything about you fills my mind. At times, I ponder whether I ever cross your thoughts too. Could this be love? My friends have mentioned it, and I can't find a way to refute them. I'm fond of you, immensely so. Isn't that a crazy twist?

It's a strange journey we're on. I started this journal to document the reasons I disliked you, but look at where it's led us. Is it too soon to be feeling this way? The idea of revealing my feelings is terrifying, yet I'm unsure if I'll ever have another opportunity. Please bear with me, allow me to find the right moment. Perhaps soon, hopefully, you'll be in my arms. I realize how absurd all this sounds – what am I even saying?

#10 – HOW EASY YOU WON ME OVER.

You won. You won my heart effortlessly, but I didn't win yours in return. I'm burdened with regret for how I've treated you. My ignorance and neglect weigh heavily on me now. It's painfully clear that he's all you've ever been able to think about. Why did I delude myself into thinking I could make a difference? If only I had treated you with the kindness you deserved from the start. Could that have made you love me instead? These thoughts haunt me.

I've grown aware of my own attachment, and I'm sorry for allowing it to consume me. I apologize for the disruption I've caused in your recent weeks. I can't bring myself to be genuinely happy for you and him, though he does seem like a better man than I could ever be. It's evident that I need to move on for your sake, to make things easier for you. Yet, there's a part of me that wishes I could still claim you as mine. That longing will always remain unchanged.

I doubt you'll ever stumble upon this journal entry, not that I would ever permit anyone to. But regardless, I want you to know that I do love you. It's a truth that's etched deeply within me, even though it pains me to admit it.

💭 — fun fact this was supposed to have a happy ending until i pulled out spotify n listened to lyn lapid…yeah.

ENHA PERM TAGLIST (🎥) — @flwoie @ixomiyu @yenavrse @shinsou-rii @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @yenqa @dimplewonie @bubblytaetae @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @starcubes @starikizs @wonioml @chirokookie @xiaoderrrr @neozon3nha @en-chantedtomeetyou @millksea @enhaz1 @eundiarys @woon2u @ja4hyvn @judeduartewannabe @j-wyoung @thia-aep @vampcharxter @softpia @officiallyjaehyuns @itsactuallylina @hsheart @sweetjaemss @ahnneyong @hanienie @jwnghyuns @kpoplover718 @jiawji @rikizm @haknom @yeokii @wvnkoi @whoschr @teddywonss @shinunoga-iie-wa @flwrshee @skzenhalove @misokei @s00buwu @ox1-lovesick @miercerise @litttlestars @enhapocketz

[yi3248]

what’s your favorite roach headcanon?

hi anon!! sorry it took so long. your ask came in just as i decided to rewatch mw2 gameplay to refresh my memory so it took a While, but its finally here! it's a bit messy. feel free to ask if there's something specific you want an opinion of :D

i subscribe to the headcanon that he is selectively mute

was found hiding in a closet, somehow chilling with a cockroach in there

on another note, he finds the closet to be a comfortable place to be in, when everything gets too much. a makeshift barrier from everything

likes smooth peanut butter

when he was in primary school, while dropping him off, his mom got fed up with his nonverbal responses. parked near the gates, wants to know why he was being so difficult

(it wasnt on purpose. he wasnt trying to be difficult. he felt so exposed, through the windows, like other students could just know why he was locked in there, why they were taking too long to simply drop off someone)

hates tomatoes

likes the sweet kind of chili sauce

wears whatever graphic tees at his disposal when on leave

does dress up once in a while though, but like, for wildly mundane occasions

i want to say he has slightly bad vision (near-sighted) but its corrected with his goggles. doesnt wear the goggles on base, when hes not in immediate battle

either skips leg days, or hes the type who has difficulty building strength in his lower limbs

still trying to reason out why he failed 2 jumps lmao. since he was able to shake his pursuers in hornet’s nest, his running and jumping muscles should also be adequate. maybe as mactavish’s journal says, his gear was weighing him down (dear god, there was a lot of parallels mactavish drew in btwn him and roach)

likes snow. likes any snow activities. doesnt like how it freezes him though

probably hid in the toilet when there was a fire drill evacuation practice at school

roach and mactavish wouldve spend some time in the same room, quietly jotting out their thoughts on the mission in their respective journals

or even lets their frustration shine through. about their lack of ability to be better, to be more efficient (this was a common theme in mactavish’s journal. regrets and aftermaths)

a steady hand forces him to stop engraving his regrets deeply into a page. eyes snap up, mouth ready to follow along until he meets roach’s heavy gaze. he huffs, the exhaled air carrying some of his tension away, the shroud of distress slowly dissipates, but it lingers

he has his own team, and the burden, the need to watch them get through to the other end all safe and sound is so juxtaposed in their career. it is inevitable, but he can still try. they can be better, stronger, less chances to be picked off

he shakes his head, patting roach’s arm. “what? yer want to take a gander at my words?” he tuts, closes his journal with a snap, a wry smirk on his face. “go put that curiousity to proper work.” he ushers roach to the training area, ignoring roach’s pointed look of distaste

(dimly, he wonders if he will follow in price’s footsteps. if roach will assimilate some of his habits to remember him, in some sort of way. we’re all amalgamations of all the people we have met, naturally)

((as he yells into the comms for an answer that never comes, he doesnt have a chance to find out))

hates the water on base. it tastes different

somehow enjoys playing the mobile ads games more than the actual game

[bluewasthecolor]

A Roller Coaster Kind of Rush

Word Count: 1,897

Warnings: None!

A/N: Based off this request! Also, I had meant to get this out about three weeks ago, but life got in the way (as it tends to do). I'm going to try and write some ficlets soon as well. I can't say this is my favorite thing I've written, but as always, let me know if you like it! Also, let me know if you want a part two!

Now

She says everything I need to hear, and it's like

I couldn't ask for anything better

You hadn’t meant to keep your new relationship a secret. It’s just that you and Alexia only talk at training now and you’d really rather not break the news in front of the whole team. You’re waiting for the right time, or, at least, that’s what you tell yourself. As it turns out, the right time is a random Wednesday in April. You’re walking hand in hand when, out of the corner of your eye, you spot a familiar blonde head on the other side of the street. It’s enough to make you turn your head fully, just in time to make eye contact with the Spaniard. She looks away almost immediately but you know she’s seen you, know she’s clocked the woman holding your hand. Alexia’s eyes, the ones you know so well, the ones that are normally so full of passion, have gone cold and distant. She continues to walk down the street, not looking back or acknowledging you in the slightest. Your girlfriend either hasn’t noticed the woman on the other side of the street or simply decides not to comment on it because she squeezes your hand and points to the café the two of you are passing.

“I’m hungry, babe. Can we stop in here?” You smile and nod, but are unable to give her your full attention. Alexia has lodged herself at the forefront of your mind and refuses to leave.

Alexia thinks she’s moved on until she sees you from afar, hand in hand with someone new.  She’s gone on a few dates, dates that went well, but nothing’s stuck yet. Still, though, it has felt good to ‘get back on the horse’ as Mapi loves to say. It hits her like a freight train when she sees you (with her): she misses you. You’re walking on the other side of the street with some redhead who, in Alexia’s opinion, looks like the opposite of your type. She’s short, maybe 5’2”, and she’s definitely not a football player. She’s laughing at something you’ve said, resting her head on your shoulder, and presses a kiss to your collarbone. It’s so different from how you and Alexia were, so much softer, so much simpler. Just as Alexia is thinking this, as the jealousy is bubbling up inside her, you look across the street and make eye contact. You freeze, pausing for a moment, but then continue on as if you never even saw her. This is what hurts Alexia most. The fact that after everything you’ve been through, after every burning hour you spent together, you could be so cold.

When she sees you at training the next day, Alexia marches straight up to you. Her eyes are narrowed, her lips pursed, and you can tell what’s coming next. She has the same expression on her face as when she catches Mapi trying to prank her or when the training schedule gets changed without notice. If there’s one thing Alexia hates, it's surprises.

“You’ve got a new girl then?” The midfielder is standing in front of you now, hands on her hips. 

“Yep. Didn’t know I had to issue a press release though.” “Is it…good? Do you like her?” You sense a bit of jealousy in Alexia’s voice and smirk before answering. 

“It’s amazing. She’s perfect. She just…she gets me. We never fight, she’s always there when I need her. I hope you can find someone like that someday.”

Alexia is caught off guard by your comment but scrambles not to let it show through. She just nods and wanders off, leaving you more confused than ever. You hadn’t spoken that much about anything other than football in months–not since the break up. You’re both able to be civil on the pitch because it’s your job and you’re professionals (that and the fact that her injury has kept her out of training) but when it comes to anything other than work your relationship is nonexistent. It’s a stark contrast from the way your love felt and this is what both of you leave the conversation thinking about. 

Then

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

And it's 2 a.m. and I'm cursing your name

“I can’t believe you. I can’t believe that this is the hill you’re choosing to die on.” Alexia snapped bitterly, turning on her heel and stalking away from you. She headed straight for the door, slamming it on her way out but you were hot on her heels. 

“You can’t believe me?!” You asked incredulously, following her out into the street. It was pitch black and raining torrentially but neither of you cared or even seemed to notice. “I can’t believe you! We don’t get many days off and all I’m asking for is one fucking day that you aren’t consumed by your injury and that you can just be here with me. Is that too much to ask for?” 

“You know it’s not that simple, Y/N. You know that this injury is all I can think about and you know how much it hurts that I can’t play right now. I’m sorry that my being injured has been an inconvenience for you but there’s not a whole lot I can do about that. This is how it is.” 

“Don’t do that, Ale. Don’t pretend like I don’t understand exactly what you’re going through. I’ve been through this before, you know that. If you would just trust me I could—”

“You could what, Y/N? When you tore your ACL you were just starting out and it wasn’t just before a major international tournament, so I’m sorry if I don’t want to take your advice. I think our situations are just a little bit different.” 

“Wow. Alright. Suit yourself then.” Your voice had gone small and you turned around slowly to walk back inside. Alexia sighed and caught your wrist with her hand. “No, Ale. I don’t want your apology right now.”

Luckily for you, she hadn’t been planning on apologizing. Instead, she pulled you into her and pressed her lips to yours. The tears on both of your cheeks mixed with the rain that was still falling and made the kiss uncomfortably wet, but the passion was undeniable. You clutched at one another, conveying all the emotions you could in the kiss. Eventually, you had to break away. Alexia looked at you, a question in her eyes. She wanted to know if the two of you were okay. She knew the kiss didn’t solve anything, knew it didn’t erase the hurtful words you’d exchanged, but she also knew it meant that not all was lost. You didn’t give her a verbal response, but you slipped your hand into hers and led her inside, giving Alexia all the confirmation she needed.

Little did you know, this was the beginning of the end.

Now

She can't see the smile I'm faking

And my heart's not breaking

'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all

Your run-in with Alexia at training makes you question everything. For the next couple of weeks you feel like you’re going through the motions but not really experiencing your life. You go on dates with your new girlfriend, meet her parents and her friends, but none of it feels real. She doesn’t know you like Alexia did, can’t tell that your passiveness is out of character for you. Eventually, though, you begin to pull away. She notices that. She even tries to confront you about it once or twice, is so earnest that you begin to feel bad, but you can’t bring yourself to change your ways. This is when she breaks up with you. The fact that it doesn’t hurt–not even a little bit–tells you everything you need to know. You miss Alexia. You miss her more than you knew was possible, more than you’ve ever missed anyone or anything. 

A few days after the break up, you’re sitting at a café with Ingrid when you make a decision. She’s been rambling on about Mapi and just how special she is, and something about a trip back to Norway, when you realize that you don’t want to go another minute without Alexia being yours. “Do you know–” You start, interrupting Ingrid mid-sentence. She looks at you surprised. For the past month or so your weekly coffee dates have been mostly Ingrid talking, so she welcomes the interruption. “Has Mapi mentioned anything about Alexia lately? About anything she’s said?” “Oh, Y/N.” Ingrid’s eyes are soft, a bit apologetic. “Mapi and I promised one another when you two broke up that we wouldn’t get involved. We love you both dearly and we don’t want to interfere.” “Really, Ingrid? That’s all you’re gonna say?” “I’m sorry. But if you want to know anything you should talk to Alexia, not me.” The Norwegian taps your hand. You nod to yourself, and go back to your reminiscing as Ingrid launches back into her story about her girlfriend.

The Next Day

And I never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you

You pause outside Alexia’s door, willing yourself to knock. There are a number of factors that could go wrong here, you know this very well, but you’re willing to take that risk. Even if Alexia doesn’t want you back, even if she’s moved on, you need to know. Before you can muster up the courage, however, the door swings open. Alexia is clearly on her way out and she looks at you in surprise as she steps out the door.

“Y/N. What are you doing here?” “Are you–where are you going?” “I was just about to run some errands. I can wait if you need me to though. Is something wrong?” “No, no, nothing’s wrong but, um, if you could wait that would be good. I need to talk to you.” The Spaniard gestures wordlessly towards her flat and you follow her inside. It hasn’t changed since the last time you were there, since the night of the breakup. You wander to the couch and make yourself comfortable, while Alexia perches herself on the chair across from her. Her arms are folded and she looks at you expectantly.

“You said you needed to talk to me, so go ahead.” 

“Right, right, sorry. So I don’t know if Mapi told you this but I got dumped.” At this, Alexia’s eyebrows fly up in surprise. Apparently Mapi was also taking the whole not getting involved thing seriously. “And here’s the thing, Ale. The breakup didn’t hurt at all. Like, not even a little bit. If anything it was a relief. That’s not how it’s supposed to feel, I know that because when we broke up…when we broke up I fell apart. I can’t do this without you, I don’t know how. You're everything to me. I've never felt anything close to what I felt–what I feel for you. And I know last time we fucked up and I know things need to be different if we try this again, but I need to tell you this now. I’m still in love with you. I want to try again, if you’ll have me.”

Alexia doesn’t say anything for a moment, but when you look up she’s crying.

[kindasleepywriter]

BoP - Chapter 4: Rough Landing

Bird of Prey masterlist. Azriel x Reader.

Chapter summary: Your arrival in Velaris ruffles some feathers.

Story rating: Mature - Minors DNI

Warnings: None.

Word count: 2.4k.

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There was nothing that you hated more than winnowing. Sure, it was a great timesaver and a practical way out of dangerous situations, but it made you dizzy, and you always had to fight back the urge to spew your breakfast for at least an hour afterwards.

Every time someone winnowed you somewhere, it felt completely different than people said it should, you weren’t just ‘stepping’ across the room. It was more like you were hurtling towards it at light speed. Not a great experience. Another fun reminder of your power or, well, your absence of it. This, however, was nothing like winnowing.

The Shadowsinger had tried to convince you that flying would be the easiest way to get to where he was bringing you, but you’d scoffed in his face. The idea of being held like a child for the entire flight felt humiliating. You missed flying, but not like this.

After minutes of arguing, he’d finally given up and told you to winnow instead. While the prospect of nausea didn’t feel much better, at least you’d save face at least a little. You mentioned to him that you couldn’t winnow yourself that far, to which he’d quirked a brow but said nothing in the end. Contempt, pity, or suspicion? You couldn’t tell. It was probably all of them anyways.

However, when he grabbed your arm to leave for Velaris, instead of feeling like you were being thrown across the sky like a projectile, you’d simply been shrouded by complete silence and darkness until you’d emerged on the other side of the Night Court, barely a breeze passing you.

The relief was short lived, however, when you found yourself suspended in mid-air, dozens of feet above the stone balcony underneath you. Your eyes widened as you started to fall, and panic overtook you. The absolute audacity of this motherfu-

You didn’t even have time to finish the thought before you were roughly encircled by arms that slowed your imminent fall and deposited you on the ground, crushing your wings painfully against your side in the process You turned quickly the second your feet were on stable ground, immediately shoving the Shadowsinger away and pulling your fist back aiming to break his damn nose. He stopped the blow with a single hand, looking unimpressed. What he clearly didn’t plan for, however, was your knee straight to his crotch.

He doubled over as he let out a loud swear, letting go of your fist and looking at you like he was planning your immediate murder. You smirked. You’d bargained to cooperate with the High Lady, not him. And technically, he was the one who’d let you start a freefall and had grabbed you against your will, hurting you in the process. This was only self-defense. You hadn’t technically broken any laws. He couldn’t do anything to you.

“I swear by the mother,” he growled, “I’m going to rip that leg straight off your body the second you’re out of this court you feral, conniving-”, only to be cut off by a loud boisterous voice.

“HA! I don’t know what you did to deserve that brother, but she got you good”, the man laughed, “Maybe we should ask her to come to training. I’m sure she has a lot more in mind for you.”

At this point you’d already jumped back a couple steps to place yourself out of the Shadowsinger’s immediate reach, shaking out your wings as much as you could without opening them, and you spun to see another Illyrian striding out of the balcony doors, a grin on his face as he mocked the one you’d aimed your anger at just moments earlier.

On average, Illyrians tended to be taller than average, just like Peregryns, but didn’t share the gracefulness and speed of the dawn-born faes because of the large amounts of (unnecessary, in your opinion) muscle from the brutal training they put themselves through. This man, however, was simply gigantic.

If you didn’t know better, you’d think he was a descendant of the mountain giants that once ruled over the mountains of Illyria. Of course, no such person existed as the species had been extinct for millennia, but if anyone were ever to make you doubt the fact it would be him. The muscle, the height, his face… a fine specimen of a man, truly, although you cut short that train of thought before things got out of hand.

The Shadowsinger was still in the process of gathering himself and straightening back up again, his dark eyes unwaveringly glaring daggers at you with a hand posed on the railing for support. His numerous siphons were glowing as if in warning.  If looks could kill, you’d already be six feet under.

“I’m Cassian,” the giant lookalike introduced himself, fully turning his attention to you. “Hopefully, we’ll start out on better terms than Az has managed to. You must be the Peregryn that caused Rhys to be mentally harassed from the moment he woke up, and apparently a Peregryn who can also manage to get a hit on Azriel’s favorite parts. Truly, a pleasure.”

He held out a hand for you to shake. You glanced at it and didn’t move a hair. You weren’t surprised Rhysand had heard all about your forest shenanigans. Daemati really did have it better than everyone else.

“Ah, so you’re the silent type.”, he said, amused, “Not exactly what Az had portrayed of you, I must admit.”

“Trust me, she had plenty to say earlier.”, Azriel bit out from across the balcony, now standing at his full height and advancing towards you slowly with his eyes fixed on you and his wings spread wide. “Don’t tell me you’re too shy to spit at him the same insults you did earlier?”

“I have none to give to a man who’s acting like a decent human”, you flatly said and rolled your eyes, “perhaps you have a few things to learn about the subject from him.”

Cassian let out a low whistle and put a hand on the Shadowsinger’s chest to stop him from advancing further . “I can almost smell the hatred between you. What the hell did you do to her, Az?”

Azriel didn’t have the time to respond before another figure emerged from the open doors. This time, it was an annoyed looking High fae that held a book in one hand and a teacup in the other. She was in relaxed, comfortable clothes, but they did nothing to hide her toned arms and legs, looking every inch as much of a warrior as Azriel and Cassian. Looking just as attractive as them too– humanoid faes were generally considered very attractive, but this was almost impressive.

You couldn’t stop yourself from staring at her, keeping the Illyrians in your peripheral vision to better prepare yourself for the possibility of Cassian letting Azriel have his fun.

“I don’t know what you guys are doing, but I’m trying to read.”, she said, waving the book in the air, “I didn’t agree for Rhys and Feyre to use my home for a “special meeting” just to have you both keep me from the best part of my novel.”

She passed a look over the two Illyrians, evaluating Azriel’s murderous stance before her eyes finally met yours and swept over your body, assessing you as if she’d only noticed you just then.

“Ah.’, she sighed, “So you’re the reason why the boys are all so wound up. Hmm. Thought you’d be more… assassin-like.”

You bristled at the comment, your emotional walls coming back up. They’d been lowered only the slightest bit with Cassian’s opening words and her initial relaxed state, but she had made sure, voluntarily or not, to remind you of your place here. A stranger. A suspect.

“Play nice, Nesta. We don’t want to run her off before she’s even arrived.”, Cassian said as he stepped closer to her and landed an arm on her shoulder. Despite the clear familiarity between the two faes, Nesta shrugged him off, laughing a little. “Old habits”. She faced you again, her smile disappearing instantly. “Come with me.”, she said. “They’ve been waiting for you.”

You nodded, hoping she only meant the High Lord and Lady. You had already seen too many Illyrians today. Nesta led you through the mountainside mansion, guiding you into a study with large windows overlooking the bright city below. It was mid-day by now and the sun shone strongly against the windows, but the room still maintained a comfortable temperature. The wonders of magic.

To your relief, the only people in the room were the two imposing figures standing behind the wooden desk: the High Lord and Lady of the Night court. Rhysand you’d seen before, although it had been centuries ago, and he’d been sporting wings that time. You weren’t surprised to see him without them, it wasn’t exactly a secret that he had the ability to conjure them at will, just like the woman beside him.

She, on the other hand, was a new face to you. A very intrigued looking face, certainly, watching you as if she was a child examining the shiny new toy she got for winter solstice. You shifted, uncomfortable.

With Cassian standing at your back, Azriel moving closer to the High Lord and Lady in front of you, and the annoyed book-reading fae standing at your left, you felt quite like a caged animal. You held your mental shield strong, hoping your face was just as unbreaking. You felt the slightest relief knowing they couldn’t hurt you. Not yet anyways.

It was the High Lady who broke the silence first, calling your name softly.

“We’ve heard a lot about you. Azriel mentioned he found you near our borders, is that right?”

“Yes, High Lady.”

She laughed as if you’d made a great joke, putting up a hand placatingly.

“Please, call me Feyre, Rhys and I don’t keep court matters as uptight as they do in Autumn. You may call him by his name too.”

Rhysand nodded beside her, smiling a wicked grin at her words, not helping in easing the tension. You were straight as a rod, face completely unmoving. You felt a brush of claws – no, talons – against your mental shields. Your stone walls held strong against the albeit gentle touch, and Rhysand’s eyes narrowed.

“If you prefer it.”, you said in the same flat tone you’d used earlier.

Feyre, seemingly unphased by your lack of reaction, continued.

“We were informed that you’d agreed freely to come meet with us here, I can say that we appreciate you not making a fuss about it. It’s only for the good of our court, I’m sure you understand.”

Agreed freely without a fuss? That’s not exactly how you’d describe securing a bargain with their court’s Spymaster, unless… they didn’t know, did they? You couldn’t help but glance at him. For once, he was sternly avoiding your gaze, confirming your suspicions.

The curious look Rhysand and Feyre gave the both of you went unnoticed.

“I simply wish to be able to continue on my journey, my Lady.”, you said, “If it matters, I’m quite keen to do that as soon as possible, as I’m sure you are too.”

“Well, it seems like someone doesn’t appreciate our hospitality”, Rhysand snarked, “Perhaps we’d appreciate your company for a few days. You sure seem like an… interesting character. A clipped Peregryn? We don’t see that often.”

Your eyes narrowed.

“I’d have thought you’d be used to the concept, given how much your camps love that particular tradition.”

“I’ll remind you that the practice has been banned since my predecessor passed away, as you surely know.”, he replied.

“And I’m sure the hundreds of fae that lost their ability to fly since that law was passed hundreds of years ago fully support the way you’ve been enforcing that law, High Lord.”, you spat.

A hand almost painfully grasped your shoulder from behind you. “I would watch your tone, Peregryn, or one might think you’ve come here with dishonorable intentions.”, Cassian warned.

“I couldn’t hurt any of you even if I tried, didn’t you know?” Both Rhysand and Feyre looked at you suspiciously.

From where he stood, there was no way Cassian couldn’t see the black markings that surely peaked out underneath the collar of your tunic. His hand roughly pulled down the fabric, far enough to reveal a few more of your vertebrae. You heard his breath catching in his throat. Bingo.

“You didn’t think I’d come here without any protection, did you?”

The eyes of everyone in the room, except for Azriel’s and Feyre’s, widened. Rhysand turned quickly to the Shadowsinger, slapping the back of his head angrily as Azriel failed to duck in time.

“You bargained with her?”, he growled as you chuckled. His attention turned back to you instantly and he waved at the door.

“I am not done with you yet either. Cassian, if you’d escort our wonderful guest out of here and into a room, while I deal with our idiot of a brother.”

“Actually-” Azriel tried to argue, but Rhysand didn't give him the chance to breath out another word: “You, shut it.”.

The Shadowsinger tried to protest again, but not before you had the chance to speak up. “He must be the one to approve who accompanies me, actually. Another part of our agreement, I’m sure you understand.”

Another slap to the head from Rhysand’s hand. Azriel groaned but took the hit without any further comments.

“Any other surprises I should expect?”, the High Lord bit out at you.

“I’m sure your spymaster will love telling you all about it.”

“You can go with Cassian”, the abused Illyrian sighed, having apparently accepted his fate. “And Cass? If she tries anything, you’ve got every right to beat her up.”

You snickered. As if.

Cassian shoved you out of the office, the doors snapping closed as he lead you down the corridor. You went along willingly. You couldn’t leave this court until Feyre let you, and you didn’t quite feel like jumping off the balcony down to Velaris, thousands of feet below.

The last thing you heard before you were not-so-kindly pushed through a bedroom door was a roar from the now distant study, its doors vibrating audibly from the other side of the manor. “AZ, ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND?”

Rhysand’s voice echoed through the halls as if in response to his anger. You let out the smallest smile. You were looking forward to leaving this place but, in the meantime, maybe you could let yourself have some fun.

Glad to be back to reader's POV! I don't know what Azriel expected after touching her wings 🤦‍♀️

We're about to get into the thick of the plot, maybe our little bird-bat duo will finally get to discover a bit more about each other and hopefully not rip out each other's throat in the process.

Banner created by the amazing @saradika

Taglist: @sapphenaa

[c-e-d-dreamer]

I'm feeling spicy and hot-take-y on this fine Saturday morning, so I just need to get this off my chest.... I fucking hate Emorie. If Emorie has no haters, then I am dead.

In my opinion at least, it's one of those lazy ships you often see. Because, that's the thing, it's something that exists across multiple fandoms and frankly across media in general. Where two queer characters are shipped together or end up together simply because they're queer.

Like honestly, why do Mor and Emerie make sense as a ship? What is it they have in common? Other than them both being warriors because literally everyone in these books minus Elain is one at this point. Why are they a perfect match? Genuinely asking.

Is it just because Mor is openly queer and Emerie is queer coded? 🙃

Because that's what always happens! It's like oh well these are the two queer characters, so they have to end up together. That is the unfortunate trend. And that's just insulting to any and all queer fans and like I said, it's LAZY! You would never do that to het ships.

I mean look how many essay long, color coded posts for whatever configuration of Az and Elain's ships there are! Do you ever see those for Emorie? Ever see anyone touting out all the contextual evidence of why they're a perfect match?

The only actual contextual evidence we have is Mor saying how much she hates Illyria. In fact, she literally tells Feyre that she wishes someone would burn the whole place to the ground when they visit Windhaven. And you want her to be with Emerie? What in the John Smith and Pocahontas BS? Be so fucking for real. Is Emerie going to teach Mor that not all Illyrians are brutes? 🤮 Spare me!

While I have literally -5 hope in SJM, I would love to see more queer characters introduced! Characters that actually make sense for Mor and for Emerie. Maybe one of the mostly unnamed priestesses? Another Illyrian? Someone new from the Winter Court since we know Mor has spent time there with Vivianne? Like please please please give us more genuine representation! Because both Mor and Emerie deserve happy endings and the type of romance their het-co-characters get! They deserve color coded essays on why this fae is actually The One for them. Ya know?

I just wish that fandoms and media as a whole would stop reducing queer characters to just their queerness. Them being queer is not in fact their entire personality. And that's my soapbox 🫡

[lovemyths]

hear me out: zosan pro wrestling au

i'm a huge wrestling fangirl and i've been thinking about how zosan really fits into this. let me lay out my argument:

pro wrestling is a mix of sports + theater/entertainment right? so while there is a sports element, pro wrestling has storylines, characters, and wrestlers engage in more dialogue-based scenes (promos) outside of the ring. HOWEVER pro wrestling as an art form has the blurriest fourth wall EVER. they often blend reality and fiction. things in storyline are represented as Real. but more often or not, Reality is brought into storyline. a big example of this is that when 2 wrestlers dislike each other irl, good business practice is to turn it into a storyline. so a feud can be a mix of fictional elements mixed with real animosity. MESSY!!

also because it's scripted, everyone in the match/storyline has to agree. which means you have to be willing to lose, or "put someone over" (make them look good). obvs if there's real beef between 2 wrestlers the politics of that can get testy

similar to acting wrestling has CHEMISTRY. it's very clear when 2 wrestlers just click in the ring. in fact there is a term called wrestling soulmates, which people use to describe a pair of wrestlers who simply bring out the best in each other naturally.

so. zosan.

often rivalries have a babyface (hero) and a villain (heel). i have so many one piece pro wrestling au Opinions and scenarios, but my ideal one for zosan is:

it takes place in the indies. babyface!sanji (nicknamed black leg) and heel!zoro come up in the business around the same time. they wrestle for different promotions (companies; side note: indie wrestlers are not contracted like in wwe so they can wrestle wherever whenever) for several years before they so happen to be booked for the same show. because they're both rising stars, they are scheduled for a match together. they're already familiar with each other's work, but there's an immediate tension there bc they are both trying to be The Indie Wrestler of their era. and their personalities clash. they clash a LOT while planning the layout of their match together.

but when they get in the ring, it's magic. inexplicably it's as smooth as butter when they wrestle each other.

which is good for both their careers, but also bad, because they hate each other and now companies all over the country want to book them together. so they're stuck in a storyline together, and unfortunately, it's the best work they've done in their careers so far. the wrestling is great, and their promos against each other are heated and leave crowds coming back for more beause they can't tell what's real or not. backstage though they get along like cats and dogs, especially when it comes to deciding who wins each match + how they can still look strong in defeat. the bookers don't mind they're both such divas because they put on a damn good match whenever the bell rings

but obvs working so closely together leads to bonding anyways, not to mention the intimacy of wrestling as a sport. some wrestling rivalries last multiple years, or decades, and rivals often are forced to team up for storyline purposes to.

what i'm saying is that maybe their storyline ends up leading to them being a tag team and going on the run of the century. maybe sanji turns heel and they're just an evil wrestling duo wreaking havoc around the country (they're both nice people irl).

i have a gajillion thoughts on this but i will stop here.

[venusssssssssss]

I rewatched ep 10 here are some thoughts:

We knew Jin took the video but he is an unreliable narrator, I don’t think he leaked it even if he said he did. Someone else leaked it but who? It would be such lazy writing because we, the audience, already saw Jin had Twitter on white mode and the video was leaked by someone who had dark mode. Why would the writers miss something so obvious? Anyway.

I understand Phee’s POV (if he’s being truthful): he did not sign up for murder nor did he know what he was really getting into. It’s also a very human thing to fall in love again and I liked that they played this card as well (not because I care for this ship or for any other ship tbh but because it such an earthling thing to do. “I love you despite of it all & i fell for you even though this started as a lie & we are both flawed & we are both guilty” bla bla bla. Love it and I will eat it up each time) Phee in this case plays the role of some of the audience (an important part of the audience is on New/Tan’s side regardless, while the rest is thinking this is too much and he needs to be stopped. There are also people who see them as simply gray characters and think that none are pure and aren’t taking any sides because they think it's pointless, but the writers don’t care about them imo. They want the first two categories to fight in the trenches about who’s right and who’s wrong and miss important details along the way - because we want so badly for some characters to deserve what they are getting).

White. We don’t know who White is and it’s been 10 episodes. This is supposed to be a slasher/thriller/murder mystery and the writers made sure we love him and hate his boyfriend Tee. But the actors said in several interviews that White is very similar to Tee and also described him as vain. Now why did they do that? The writers made sure the audience hate Tee. Now that could mean 1000 things. Maybe they are playing into the narrative: White is a colateral victim, Tee was a shitty kid but a kid too who was the product of the very bad adults around him & although he is flawed look how much he loves White. They already gave us fluffy flashbacks episode with PheeNon & Pheejin. Are we getting another one with TeeWhite this late in the show? I don’t think so. White remained spotless ‘till now but I feel a twist coming. He is probably related to someone very important or withholds some very important information from us, the audience. Are they gonna explain to us White and Phee’s little moment in the beginning of the show? That had to mean something. Some people say White is just a colateral victim. Because we saw already that New doesn’t care if people who weren’t directly involved die. So I see why people believe that as well. But White is one of the main characters so I don’t think he is just a damsel in distress.

Phee is also an unreliable narrator. He thinks New did all that but he doesn’t know all the details. Phee at this point knows less than the audience and is showing us what he thinks is true. What we saw half of this episode is what Phee thinks happened, but New is telling the audience nothing so we can't be sure.

New never trusted Phee. He already warned him 2 years ago, he already saw how his dynamic with Jin would play out, he predicted a lot of his moves, he used him but did not tell his real plan (and why would he? New wants the world to burn he has no time for feelings).

More people are going (and need) to die because this is a slasher. They have 2 episodes to kill pretty much everyone and I wanna be entertained. I want this to go out with a bang.

Also this is just my opinion and burning desire but i want a big reveal. I don't want the big reveal to be that Tan is New because it wasn't a big reveal for the audience (who already saw it coming) and it surely was not a big reveal to the other characters involved.

[synergysilhouette]

Changes I'd make to Tim Drake (Warning: may be controversial)

As my favorite Robin, I've needed to make this post for a long time. I know my opinions may not be agreed upon, but I hope my dedication is still appreciated, nonetheless.

He isn't dragged for his superhero goals--Any poor mistake that DC makes, they decide to pin it on him having poor judgement, which is really unfair. As many things that get ignored/retconned (even if they arguably shouldn't be, depending on the subject), it feels bizarre to drag Tim for things like his ill-fated "Drake" costume and era, especially when it was walked back on so quickly. On top of this, people seem to look down on him for genuinely enjoying being Robin. Robin wasn't always a "move on" position, per se; Dick had been Robin for consecutive decades before deciding he wanted something different, while Jason was murdered and became someone else as a reflection of this. Tim became Robin because he saw that Batman NEEDED him, and deduced Batman and the previous Robin's identities on his own. If he wants to do stop being Batman's partner (or sidekick, depending on perspective), it should be his own choice, not everyone else saying "this was a temp job and you're out."

He has his own unique color, costume, and maybe even codename--Even if he remains by Batman's side, Tim deserves to be distinct; his codename and color scheme are shared with all his brothers, and it doesn't do much for him. I'd definitely prefer a cowless take on his Savior costume (unsure about the codename; it feels a bit too on-the-nose, but it also feels like it represents his need to help others) or bring back his N52 Red Robin suit WITH the wings as well as making him the brother in purple, which goes well with the Batfamily's aesthetic as well as signifying his romance with Stephanie and friendship with Bunker.

He's going for a psyche major--I feel like this fits so well with his motivations. It's weird that the Batfamily doesn't put more stock in studying psychology outside of Harley (who rarely uses this skill, much to my chagrin). Tim wants what's best for everyone, and became a hero in order to help people. He isn't simply trying to stop problems, but prevent them and make Gotham a better place for everyone. While he can still go for a cyber-related degree (I don't remember his exact major), I'd prefer he also go for a degree that furthers his desire to understand and improve others, plus it's good to help him better understand himself as well. Definitely would've made this something he furthered in "Heroes in Crisis" (which I should make an post about another time).

He isn't bi--Hate me if you must. I'm a gay guy, and I just didn't vibe with this reveal. During the mid-2000s, it was stated by one of his artists that he and the writers kind of already saw Tim as bi, though DC never made this canon until 2021. As far as I know (as a 2010s comic person), it never seemed like DC was keen to lean into LGBT sexuality for Tim, and given that they've been treating him poorly post-N52, it feels like this was a random "let's find a way to make Tim as popular as his brothers" by making him stand out in a way that they didn't. I know this is a bold claim, but this is a feeling I've had for a while now, especially since his personal life now mainly revolves around Bernard (personal bias, but I'm usually not a fan of heroes dating non-heroes; I'd prefer him with Bunker--or Connor, if he's romantically into guys). And they haven't done him many favors since; DC infamously described him as the "always-online bisexual" in a now deleted tweet that embodies my concern that they're just defining him by his sexuality now, as well as a solo comic with horrendous art for most of the run. If Jason or Damian were depicted as bi (with the latter being the least controversial choice, imo, given his younger tenure in comics and romantic life not as fleshed out), I'm almost sure they'd be better handled, probably because they've been better handled as characters in recent years. Overall, I found Tim's retcon of sexuality unnecessary (yet we have bi characters such as Ghostmaker who were LGBT from the get-go and don't get nearly as much attention) and overall used as a metaphor for his "indecisiveness" at making decisions that DC forced onto him.

He still has a (biological) family and life--A big problem with writers and artists is that they sometimes have a problem with trying to make the 4 Robins identical in appearance and lives. Unlike Jason and Dick, Tim wasn't an orphan adopted by Bruce, not originally anyway. He had his own life and chose to be part of Bruce's world, and the need to make him an orphan with pretty much nothing going on in his civilian life was disrespectful (is he still an Olympic-level gymnast? Kinda love the idea that he takes time off for "me time" here and there and that's when Damian or another Batfam member jumps in). Let him have friends and family as Tim Drake, not just as Robin. Let Bruce be his dad without killing off his biological one. Let Tim have autonomy and individuality!

More A-list connections--This is being petty, but most of his friends are next-gen heroes with no major stuff going on for themselves, just like him. Surrounding yourself with important people can help you become important, too. I'm not telling friends to drop his friend groups (him and Conner have one of the best male homosocial relationships in comics and it sucks how they got overshadowed by Damian and Jon), but giving him more relationships with well-known characters could help his status. Plus maybe involve him in more teams outside of Teen Titans and the Batfamily; it's not good that he jumps between being an underrated member amongst iconic characters and a leader of underrated people. Just make sure he's not trading positions to become another hero's apprentice--there was once plans for him to be the next Blue Beetle as well as a temporary Nightwing, neither of which would be good for him, tbh. I have similar feelings for Starfire (we need more of her friendship and Superman; plus I'd love another underrated TT team led by Tim, perhaps with Ryand'r).

Never lose sight of who he is--The idea with Tim (at least from what I've absorbed) is that he's the most optimistic, maybe even naive, version of Dick, committed to wanting to help people and support them, and not one to brush them off of devalue them. He's got a heart, not just a brain, and I like to consider him one of the glue sticks that holds the family together. He doesn't need to be edgy or cool in the way that Damian and Jason are, nor should he be reduced to a sex object like Dick (which is another post entirely).

[pikkish]

I'm new to the fandom, just played 2016 and Eternal in quick succession. Eternal's DLC left me really dissatisfied, but I can't really explain why or how. Based on that poll you made, it's clear you've got some Opinions on the writing, so I was hoping you would like to share them? I feel like I need someone to mull over that whole story with. You can message me privately if you wish!!

Hi there! Welcome to the Doom fandom! I hope you enjoy your stay here more than you enjoyed TAG's writing! And you're more than welcome to come yell with me about Doom and its related games any time!

You're more than correct in your assertion that I have some Opinions about modern Doom's writing, in fact, I have quite a few of them. Most of them can be summed up as "the writing is just plain bad," which is probably also the reason you're unsatisfied with it. It's inconsistent, it regularly sacrifices coherence for the sake of something that looks cool for trailer shots, it has a lot of details that very much could be interesting plots but are simply ignored after their first mention, and at least a few more things that I'm forgetting, it's been a little bit since my last playthrough of TAG and these are just the major ones off the top of my head.

Take Hayden, for example. In 2016, he's the classic egotistical, powerful CEO of a major weapons industry, who maybe didn't necessarily intend to get a ton of people killed, but now that he has, he's gonna stick to his guns and insist he's still in the right, this was an unfortunate accident, but what he's doing is necessary, for the good of humanity, can't you see? He's the good guy! He's just trying to make things better! And he's dedicated to this course well enough that he's willing to betray the man who's there to save him, and boot Doomguy back into Hell at the end of 2016.

Then you get to Eternal, and he's inexplicably changed his mind for no good reason? And it's not like he's learned his lesson and has become more humble for it; sure, he got his rear handed to him by demons, and he emphatically states that the creation of Argent Energy is an "unholy union" that "cannot continue," but at the same time, he still acts constantly like he has everything under control and heavily implies that, were he in charge, this situation wouldn't be so bad- as if he weren't in charge when it got this bad. It's like they wanted him to have the exact same attitude (and therefore, ability to deliver dramatic voicelines) as in 2016, but didn't want to commit to him being a villain, so they just went "ok! he doesn't like Argent Energy any more," and went with it, then never felt the need to explain how or why this complete shift in attitude came about. As a result, it feels like Hayden has no clear motive or goals, and falls pretty flat as a character in general.

And then, to take it into TAG, there's the Seraphim, and don't even get me started on how much I hate that that's his name, "seraphim" is the PLURAL form of "seraph," it's like how "Guy" is a real name but then if they decided to name a character "Guys" instead, and it drives me crazy-- whom they go to some lengths to confirm is, in fact, the same person as Hayden, but then, despite the fact that Samur is sick and dying from the moment you revive him, for some reason, Hayden has to turn back into Samur. I suppose there's maybe some indication that Samur and Hayden are actually different people implied by Hayden referring to the Seraphim in the third person through the beginning of the Atlantica level, but there's still never any explanation given for that, whether they are or aren't the same person, or why you need to bring Samur back in Hayden's place.

And then, you beat Samur up, and guess what? He immediately stops being relevant to the plot and is almost completely forgotten. And that's a recurring theme in modern Doom! Olivia Pierce and the Khan Maykr both share the same fate, the moment they're dead, they practically just stop existing. Sure, there's the statue of Olivia in Nekravol, and, like, a single mention of the Khan in one of TAG's codices, if I remember correctly, but personally, to me, both of those feel more like the devs giving you a wink and a nudge and saying "haha hey, remember them?" like it's more of an Easter Egg than them actually having any significance.

And then there's the whole mess that is Davoth. Admittedly, having the Divinity Machine be fueled by his power, and Doomguy being enhanced by that power is thematically appropriate, what with the whole reason Doomguy wins being that he's even angrier than Hell. I also think something like the Divinity Machine and Dooomguy becoming superhuman did have to happen eventually, because how many times can one man singlehandedly beat back the whole of Hell itself before he stops being just some guy? But I don't think it was executed very well.

For one thing, I don't think it was a good move to imply that Doomguy always was some sort of pseudo-god super entity right from the start. Sure, like I said, he did inevitably have to stop being just some guy, but him being just some guy was a good bit of the charm of classic Doom in my opinion. All we knew about him was that he loved his pet rabbit, and was more willing to punch his commanding officer in the face than follow an order to shoot civilians. And yeah, if you take that, and also assume that the story cards are Doomguy's own internal monologue or at least a representation of his attitude, then you can't really say he was ever a blank slate character, but he was still just some guy, and he was relatable for that. And going "well, actually, he was a godling from the very beginning" just doesn't feel very good in my opinion, and feels like a big retcon besides. (And we'll get to more "well, ACTUALLY" stuff in a bit, but first I wanna finish up the tangentially Davoth related stuff first.)

All that aside, if we take it at face value and say sure, Doomguy was always something a little more than human, always destined to become the ultimate warrior, rather than making himself into the Doom Slayer by surviving Hell, then there's still not really any reason for Davoth to have looked exactly like him, beyond going "you-- but EVIL!!" for the drama of it. I think there was maybe one codex entry that says Davoth's whole soul-stealing operation was for the sake of providing his own people with immortality, which is to say, he was fighting to protect his home or something to that effect, so an argument could be made that his looking like Doomguy is an attempt at exploring "this is you, gone too far, this is you if you ever let go of your morals, this is everything you risk becoming," but, again, it's mentioned like... once, in one codex, and never explored or elaborated upon further. If I remember correctly, Davoth himself never even acknowledges this, it's just the codex entry, and he just goes on about how he'll kill Doomguy and destroy everything he ever loved. If they really wanted to make him a sympathetic villain like that, then they should've actually given us the opportunity to feel that sympathy for him. Let me see the people he's trying to protect- is it an idyllic paradise, oblivious to the lengths being gone to to keep them comfortable? A broken, dying people who should have gone extinct long ago, but for this thievery of the lives of others? I know Hell is supposed to be Jekkad, corrupted, and even in theory, that's fine- you could say Davoth's become so ruthless in pursuit of this immortality for his people that he's blinded himself to how it's also destroyed that which he was attempting to save- but you can't really see that. It's still just Hell, not really any sort of remnant of something worth saving.

And speaking of that. Trying to make Davoth a sympathetic villain at all feels like a bad choice to me. Doom is about fighting demons, about carving a bloody war path through the ultimate evil of Hell itself, and about feeling viciously satisfied about doing it. Making it about a desperate man who can't accept that he failed to save what he cared about, and making about killing that man before he does any more damage in attempting to do what he's already failed to do just doesn't feel good the way the rest of Doom does. And beyond that, TAG doesn't even succeed in the emotional gut punch that would come from it, had they managed to make Davoth into an actually sympathetic villain. It's like they're trying to strike a balance between the gratuitously violent and exhiliratingly triumphant feel that Doom is known for, and an emotionally impactful story, and as a result, both end up landing somewhere between mediocre and just plain bad.

I don't have a good segue into this bit except to say it's coming back to the "well, ACTUALLY," thing I mentioned earlier, which is: there are a lot of parts that feel a lot like a six year old kid is just making up the plot on the spot, like, for example, "Doomguy LAUNCHES himself out of a CANNON and he has a MAGIC SWORD and a PET DRAGON that carries him to the MAGIC CRYSTAL in the MIDDLE of the PLANET." Granted, these ones are pretty small and relatively inconsequential in the grand scheme of things, and, yeah, okay, they do look pretty cool. But they don't really... fit? Yeah, it's not like classic Doom didn't have this too, In Doom I alone, Doomguy gets pissed about not getting a reward for beating up the barons, practically just jumps off the side of Deimos, and then finally gets to go home when a secret teleporter just opens beside him after Hell decides he's "too tough" for it. But that all fits in classic Doom, because it's not trying to be a serious, grimdark story. Classic Doom is goofy, and it knows it, and it doesn't try to be anything else. But modern Doom tries so hard to be a very serious, dramatic story and also keep the sillier bits of classic Doom, and- yeah, okay, I already made this point once, but here it is again- it ultimately kinda fails at both as a result.

But then there's the bigger of these, namely VEGA. You spend the majority of both 2016 and Eternal with him as your main companion, and, as far as I can remember, there's never really anything to indicate that he's anything other than what he's introduced as, a sentient AI, created to help manage the Mars base. And then you get to the end of Eternal, and- after basically making you sacrifice him for a second time- with next to no buildup, go, "well actually, he's the god of the bad guys." And I'd complain about that plot thread also being brought up and then dropped with no further elaboration, except they do elaborate on it, and that's basically all that TAG is about. They spend the whole of TAG 1 telling you how VEGA is the god of Literally Everything, and how he made Davoth, then didn't kill him when he started to get out of hand, and aren't you MAD at him, for making all your problems, for being too merciful with his own creation that he loved, and don't you just wanna DESTROY the thing that would give him power again?

And then you get to TAG 2 and they spend the whole time going "WELL ACTUALLY it's DAVOTH who's god and VEGA STILL couldn't kill him and he's been LYING to you this ENTIRE TIME." It almost feels to me like a bad fandom interpretation to justify not liking a character, except worse because they're actually the ones who made the character and wrote the story, and I'm not entirely sure why they intentionally tried to make VEGA a helpful, likeable character, gave him a backstory that arguably makes him more sympathetic than Davoth, and then went "actually we hate him now and are gonna do everything we can to try to make you hate him too."

There are definitely more things I could bring up, like whatever the whole deal with the wraiths and the World Spear is, and probably a handful of other things I'm forgetting, too, but it's getting late and I gotta get up to go to work tomorrow. At any rate, thanks for stopping by and giving me an excuse to finally yell about these things! Feel free to stop by and chat with me about video games whenever you want, I love getting to hear other people's thoughts on these things just as much as I love getting to give my own.

[acourtofthought]

You can't appreciate the story an author is trying to tell if you're spending your time trying to fit your own morals, opinions, etc. into your reading experience.

Reading is about letting go of your preconceived notions, freeing yourself from the rules you live by in your real life.

That doesn't mean you abandon your human decency once you put the book down, it simply means upon entering their fictional world you arrive with a blank canvas so the author can paint the picture for you.

If you fail to grasp then, then you'll never truly experience the journey they're trying to take you on.

Can you dislike the direction the author went? Sure! Can you hate that she made the bad guy a "good guy", the "hero" of the story? Yes! But you can't mistreat readers who have chosen to suspend their disbelief for the sake of "listening" to the author. For understanding what the author is trying to say. For giving the author the respect they deserve for the story they are trying to tell. Just because you dislike something doesn't erase the direction they went.

The acotar fandom way too often tries to claim moral superiority because they look down on character X's actions and how horrible others are for liking them because that must means they'd be fine with allowing it in real life.

To those people I say you're not grasping the point of a fictional fantasy world. Or even a fictional world. Both of which are created by authors for entertainment value only.

I'm sorry anyone feels triggered by the things Jurian said or did in the past and I feel bad that it still disturbs them but is the readers personal opinion about Jurian more valid than Sarah's personal opinion in terms of the story she's trying to tell?

Is anyone getting the vibe that Sarah wants her readers to hate Jurian? I'm not. In fact, I get the vibe that Sarah wants readers to now like his character and to realize he's influential to the human lands. That doesn't mean all readers like him just because Sarah said so but regardless of someone's opinion of Jurian the story has moved forward with him as a good guy at heart to the characters in the book.

Feel free to have personal opinions but maybe stop forcing personal opinions into understanding what the author is saying for the sake of the story.

You can personally dislike Jurian while still acknowledging that within the acotar world he's no longer supposed to be a bad guy and that means if Elain were to become friendly with him it's OK because again, the acotar world has forgiven him even if you haven't.

[darklinaforever]

You said this

So thank you for prove that you have no reading comprehension.

Do you know how many times I have heard this in real life from dickwads like you because I fucked up reading something. It's the kneejerk response people like you use. Instead of being patient and sensible and using your brain to think maybe this person has a reading problem, you just use ablelist slander. It's not about being a mind reader either it's about being a decent human being. It's like telling someone walking slow to hurry up when they might have a physical disability that makes them not be able to. But you wouldn't understand this because you're ablelist.

Yes I made a grace joke because it's meme level now and you are a cunt and treated me badly. Love how you also shat on the sa victim as well. So they're not valid because they were assaulted and feel triggered which colors what they see in the scene but because you like Daemyra and Rhaenyra is your bb girl, you are valid and make out what you see is the reality

Hear is a new flash bitch Viserys was a rapist Rhaenyra was a rapist and Aegon was a rapist. Daemon is a grooming pedo incest wife killer. But you talk about accepting their vices when you don't you deliberately blind yourself to their vices. You are a twat and everyone hates your guts btw

Grace sends her regards lol

Also no wonder you were bullied at school makes sense you're now the bully acting so vile

Do you know how many antis and haters say things to me that don't make any sense when I've given them perfectly clear answers just to try to put me down for free ? Simply because the reality of my words does not correspond to their defamatory speech ?

Literally tons and tons of times.

So yes, sorry for not necessarily having thought that you could be dyslexic and autistic instead of just belonging to the usual group of hateful morons.

At this point, you blame me for not being a soothsayer and not knowing how to distinguish your hatred from that of others.

You also visibly love, like your compatriots, use big words whose meaning you don't understand. Just like ableist which is discrimination or prejudice against individuals with disabilities. But how the hell could I be that when I had no idea you were autistic and basic dyslexic ? You are only trying to discredit me and make yourself look like a victim.

And sorry, but this story with Grace doesn't have to become some sort of meme level, and this sentence : "Tell grace I said hi btw lol" Makes you the first person to be rude out of both of us whether you like it or not, particularly annoying me. So once again, stop trying to play the victim. Besides now you insult me ​​as a bitch and twat...

You're the one who comes to my inbox and talk rude, so don't be surprised that I'm not very polite to you in return.

Then, I didn't shit on the victims of SA :

I simply said that it is not because a person is a victim of SA and sees a fictional scene as such that it means that it is necessarily true, because their opinions can also be false, because the victim of SA are humans like you and me, simple as that. It may shock you that I have the balls to say it, but it's just reality and you don't seem mature enough to hear it.

And the posts about Criston Cole have absolutely nothing to do with Daemyra, so why are you bringing this ship back to the table to try to discredit me ? It's ridiculous.

Funfact : Rhaenyra is not a rapist in Fire and Blood or HOTD and Daemon is not a groomer or a pedophile in Fire and Blood or HOTD (and he didn't kill his wife in Fire and Blood, it is an invention of HOTD, because he was at war when she died from a fall from a horse during a hunt, after agonize for 9 days and getting up one last time before finally dying).

Daemon, suspected of sexual contact with 13 / 14-year-old Rhaenyra in the book /19-year-old Rhaenyra in the show, may be an ephebophile. But there is no evidence (because besides, he has officially only been with adult women by our modern standards).

This came from this post from @nrilliree :

Oh and I would like to understand how the incest part is supposed to be a revelation or an insult ? In this aspect, Daemon is no different from any other Targaryen.

And if I'm willfully blind to Rhaenyra's vices and an twat for it, I hope once again that, as I told the other anons, that the same thing can be said of the writers, producers and actors of HOTD in this case, since everyone on the crew confirmed that this scene was not rape, consistent with what is shown on screen... I hope you say the same for them, but I doubt.

And again, I'm not harassing anyone on tumblr. Stop spewing these lies to feel justified in your vile words. It was you who came to invade my inbox, sending me your messages again and again, being the first to be rude. You are literally doing what you accuse me of, which is hypocritical behavior.

[strawberrymilk-sunshine]

That poor, unfortunate, sweet child...

Can you guys tell just how much I like Octavinelle yet

ALSO ALSO was anyone gonna tell me that Flotsam and Jetsam had their own songs in the broadway version of The Little Mermaid or was I just supposed to find out from this cover?

Warning(s): tweels are over-protective/possessive, Azul is a yandere, forced kissing, mentioned fighting and injuries, reader is gn but the term 'merman' is used to refer to them, I'm writing this super late at night again so the quality might not be great

You would do anything to get Jade and Floyd to stop bothering you.

And, well... you did do anything.

You signed your name upon the golden contract scroll.

"Ah, thank you, (Y/N). I assure you, all your problems will be solved very soon."

"...Azul, why do my legs hurt?" You asked, immediately assuming he had something to do with it.

"It's simple. In order for you to get something..." He smiled. "I must take something in return!"

You fell to your knees, screaming out in pain. It it felt like... like someone was stabbing your legs... or like they were melting...

"Does it really hurt that bad?" Azul asked. "Well... I do suppose that'd be rather painful for you... do quiet down, though, we wouldn't want to scare away the other patrons."

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!" You yelled.

"I simply did what I had to in order to get Jade and Floyd to leave you alone."

That was weeks ago.

What was Azul's solution to the twins bothering you? His solution was... to turn you into a merman. Probably the worst solution he could've thought of, in your opinion.

Well, Jade and Floyd did bother you less now that you were one of them, but still, this sucks.

You were allowed to swim in the stupid little fish tank at Octavinelle's stupid little business and all the stupid little customers find your stupid little new body super cool leading Azul to get more people to agree to his stupid little deals, ugh, you hated it.

Floyd taught you how to use your tail properly, which was nice of him, but it didn't change the fact that he was really fucking annoying.

You didn't want to be here.

Jade and Floyd would wrap their freakishly long tails around you in, I don't know, I guess some kind of hug?

"Poor child." Floyd whispered to you.

"Poor, sweet child." Jade added.

"Aaaahhh, you're not happy with your situation, are you...?"

"How sad."

"How traaagic."

"But (Y/N), don't you know?"

"This is what's best for you!"

"Now that you're here, in the water, a part of our world, we know that you are safe every hour of the day while we're away at school."

"Yeeeah... we were worried for you, just so worried, when you were going to classes! And now that you don't, we don't have to feel so scaaaared for you, ehe~!"

"This is the best solution."

'For you, maybe.' You thought. You wanted to say it out loud, but, well... you don't see that turning out well for you.

But, what the three of you didn't know was that someone else had his myopic eyes on you.

Every day Azul saw you in that new body of yours, he found himself becoming more and more attracted to you.

It was vexing, how beautiful you were. Everything about you. Your fins, your tail's colouration, even the parts of you that didn't change during your transformation somehow was more attractive to him now.

What was different? Was it just that you were now the same species as him? Is that the only reason? No, it's more than that, it HAS to be more than that! Is it... jealousy? Is the only reason he likes you so much because Jade and Floyd like you so much?

Well, whatever the reason, Azul was forced to admit that he was falling in love with you.

"I'll let them have their fun." Azul said to himself, chuckling as he looked into the tank. The twins were too busy smothering you to notice him, and even if they did, there's a thick layer of glass between him and them, they wouldn't be able to hear what he was saying. "I'll let them play with (Y/N) a while longer. But, their time is running out. Long before (Y/N)'s theirs, they will be mine. I'm sure of it."

"Um... Housewarden A-Ashengrotto...?" Some random Octavinelle student asked. "You, uh... not to interrupt your plotting... but, there are some clients waiting for you."

"Ah yes, tell them I'll be right there."

"Yes, Housewarden!" The nameless student ran off.

"(Y/N)... you poor, unfortunate soul. We'll be together soon." He kissed his finger and pressed it to the glass.

Things haven't been getting worse, which is good, but that doesn't mean it's been getting any better.

You've been getting more used to this half-fish body. And it was kinda cool, in a way... you gotta look for the good things in life, you know?

You were just relaxing, wondering if you would ever get to turn back to normal. Then, you heard something enter the water, and the water became... cloudy...?

Oh. Oh, this is ink, isn't it.

"(Y/N), you have to promise not to make fun of me, ok?" You heard a voice that was absolutely Azul ask. Great, this is exactly what you needed.

Wait... maybe it is exactly what you needed! Maybe you can convince him to tear up the contract!

"Why would I make fun of you, Azul?" You asked in a sweet tone. "You're so amazing, there's nothing to make fun of you for!"

"Oh...! Well I... t-that's very kind of you, (Y/N)." Azul said, sounding nervous in a romantic way (don't come for me I couldn't find a word). "Every passing day, every time I see you... I find myself falling deeper in love with you."

The inky cloud disippated, and you saw Azul in his octopus form. And you had one thing you needed to ask.

"Why aren't you wearing your glasses?"

"As an octopus, I have speacial muscles in my eyes that help me overcome my near-sightedness." Azul explained. "Naturally, when in human form, I don't have those muscles and thus need glasses."

"Azul... you like me, don't you...?" You asked.

"Ah-! Yes, I-I suppose that's true..." Azul looked away from you, a blue blush spreading across his face.

'Well, if you do like me, then..." You leaned forwards. "Rip up the contract."

"Mmm... no, I can't do that, (Y/N)..." Azul said, sounding troubled. "That contract is protecting you. You know how... protective... Jade and Floyd are of you. If things were to go back to normal..." He shuddered at the thought.

"What? People would die?" You jokingly asked.

"Well... yes." Azul said. "I'm almost sure that's exactly what would happen."

"Oh."

"Yep."

"But-"

"You'd be much safer with me." Azul stared directly at you. "Wouldn't you agree? I could get Jade and Floyd to agree to a contract where the terms include never being anywhere near you! wouldn't that be perfect? It would, wouldn't it? (Y/N), don't you agree? Don't you agree?!"

"Wha-? G-get your tentacles off me!" You yelled.

"(Y/N), let's make a new deal, why don't we~?" Azul asked, leaning in close as he wrapped his tentacles around you. "I'll give you your legs back..." He whispered. "All you need to do is love me."

Before you could say anything else, two people (or rather, two morays) dove into the water.

Oh, this can't be good.

"What do you think you're doing, Azul?"

"You think you can just try and steal Shrimpy away from us?"

"We won't allow it."

"They're ours."

Azul decided to choose a very risky move. He kissed you. He kissed you directly on the lips, passionately, nearly making out with you. As some sort of power play, maybe? You're not sure why he did it, truthfully.

The aftermath of that was obviously a fight between the trio.

Azul did manage to get out of the water and escape within an inch of his life.

"(Y/N), he didn't hurt you too badly, did he?" Jade asked.

"He didn't hurt me at all!" You insisted.

"He didn't try to force you into a deal, did he?" Floyd asked.

"N-no! No! He didn't! Why would he?" You asked, hoping they wouldn't realize you were lying. That contract Azul mentioned... you can go back to normal, if only you love him! And... and he can make sure the twins never bother you again.

Quite the tempting deal.

"Well alright then!" Floyd smiled almost too widely. "I'm gonna go make sure Azul isn't too injured. All things considered, we need someone to run the Lounge... it'd be so booooooooring running it."

"Yes, agreed. Speaking of injuries, I should go visit the infirmary." Jade said, before turning to you. "(Y/N), you'll be ok on your own, right?"

"O-of course I will! You know me!"

"Alright then! Later Shrimpy!"

"See you soon, (Y/N)."

To be honest, you don't care what you have to do for it to happen, you just want your life to go back to normal.

[black-and-yellow]

The Mind Electric - Loudspeaker AU

Hizashi Yamada gets a stern talking-to, because someone has to reel him in, and of course it would be Kayama.

~2.7k words Yes it's named after the Miracle Musical song, the vibes were just chefs kiss. Based on this comic.

Also on AO3 here

Yamada awoke with a start, eyes snapping open, expecting to see sunlight filling the room, but it was still almost entirely dark. He didn’t know what had woken him, he didn’t remember having a particularly horrifying dream – in fact, he couldn’t remember having dreamt at all. He moved a hand to his stomach, his skin burning hot against his fingers.

That was when his eyes caught a glimpse of something, a silhouette in front of the roof window, where the pale glow from street lights outside filtered pathetically through the thin cloth ‘curtains’ he’d stuck up to cover the smashed hole in the glass.

Clumsily, he pawed around for his glasses and found them on the floorboards by his mattress. He knocked over an empty takeout box as he did, sending disposable chopsticks and the remnants of some kind of cheap sauce spilling onto the floor.

When he’d pushed his glasses up onto his nose and his eyes adjusted to the light, he could see her.

At first his heart jumped, but he calmed himself, knowing there was a more realistic answer. He blew out a sigh, the short lived elation drowned out by disappointment.

“You’re in my head.”

Kayama looked down at him, her arms behind her back, standing there bathed in an unreal glow. Her face was only just visible, but Yamada could make out the whites of her eyes and the lenses of her glasses. She wore an off-the-shoulder sweater, something she’d wear around the house when she was off-duty. Warm and soft and baby pink.

“That’s right,” she said, voice flat and expressionless.

“So I’m dreaming?”

“Obviously.”

Yamada slowly pulled himself to his feet to step closer, gangly legs wobbling under the unsteady weight of himself. He could see her better, then; the dark mole under her left eye, her perfectly applied mascara, the faintest hint of smile lines at the corners of her mouth. Not a detail absent.

“I’m just how you picture your conscience,” she told him, and he sneered a bit, perhaps at himself. Don’t people usually dream about their teeth crumbling or something when they’re nervous? Why did she have to be here?

“So my conscience has Kayama’s face. What’s up with that?” he asked, although he knew the answer perfectly well.

“Oh, please,” she responded, in that short and fed up manner that she always used on him when he wore her patience too thin with his feigned stupidity shtick, “You respect her. You love her, you value her opinion, you need her to talk some sense into you. And you’ll listen to her. More than you’ll listen to yourself, at least.”

He narrowed his eyes, drew himself up to his full height. He hated being read like this, but he paused to remind himself that he was simply talking to himself, in an unconventional way.

“What do you even want?”

“You know full well what I want. I want you to stop all… this,” she threw her arms up at him, regarding him with a certain air of disgust, “This has all gone too far.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re a danger to yourself. You’ve been a danger to yourself for years. But this…?” she slowly shook her head at him in a disapproving way, “You don’t even know what you’re doing any more, or why. You lost sight of yourself the moment you started to spite Aizawa.”

He internally cringed at hearing Aizawa’s name. Admittedly, there had been a switch flicked in his head for a while, but he couldn’t put his finger on when it happened. Maybe it was at the park, when Aizawa had knocked his teeth out, or when he hadn’t shown up to the bar. He’d even been intending to turn himself in at that point, racked with guilt at what he’d said to him. Aizawa’s words when they met up in the back alley rang in his head,

“What do you think Nemuri would say if she were here?”

And he’d justified it to himself since then. Nemuri would have understood, he’d told himself for weeks – months, even. She would be on his side, she’d respect his decision, she’d say ‘If you think this is for the best, I’m right behind you’. But now here she stood, even though it wasn’t really her, but it was what he really knew she’d do, and she was clearly angry with him. She regarded him with obvious disgust and just a hint of pity, like how you’d look at roadkill.

“You started taking a more active role in the vanguard squad. Every time you go out, you use more of your quirk. You like it,” she went on.

And he had to admit. He did like it. Working in close proximity with other heroes, as well as innocents he couldn’t risk hurting, he was constantly holding himself back. But here, he didn’t have to worry about it. When Shigaraki had questioned whether he was even worth keeping around, in his first few weeks with them, when he would mostly provide intel, he had insisted that his quirk could be a worthwhile asset to the PLF. Some of the other villains took him to a secluded area, far enough away from any patrols that might hear, and insisted he prove his claim. He stood on his own away from them, about the same distance the other heroes always kept behind him. He cranked up his bass, his volume, his reverb, his everything, to the point that he had to stop because Dabi started throwing up and the others were all clawing at their ears, but he could have kept going. He’d earned his place in the Vanguards, he’d sat up straighter since then, he kept an ongoing rumble in the back of his throat, and the rest of the squad generally kept their distance from him. And he liked it

That was the kind of respect he just didn’t get back at UA. Even when he’d lose it, Aizawa would always shoot a glare at him and his voice would be cut off and he’d look a fool to everyone. Nobody took him seriously, even when they knew what he could do in theory, like they knew that he was simply too pathetic to actually use it for anything except being irritating and the occasional stun attack, which they didn’t usually see anyway because he was mostly off to the sidelines. Maybe it was because he’d always been shadowed by the statures of the other heroes. Even Midnight could pick him up, and she would, just to be annoying, or embarrass him at parties.

“You’ve stopped caring who gets hurt,” Kayama carried on, then she jabbed a finger at him, inches away from his chest, purposefully not touching him, “All that’s in here is rage. You’re fuelled by it. Spite and rage.”

He’d always been angry, since he was a teen. He’d keep quiet when he was irked, but he never really calmed himself, he just put on a grin and simmered in it. If he started to boil over, Midnight would cool him down, telling him sternly to sit down and stop it. And he only did because it was her. And after she was gone, there was nobody to metaphorically take him off the heat. He could feel the stove growing hotter even now, even though it was her face, because he knew she was right.

“You can’t go back now, you’re like a cassette with all the tape unravelled. You’re all over the place. You’ve got your head in the PLF, your heart stuck in a past you could never have had back anyway, you’ve got your feet somewhere between home and Tartarus. I don’t even know where your backbone is. Oh, you just get so much worse, don’t you?”

He clenched his jaw, heat building in his chest. He could feel the nerve endings in his face twitching but he bit his tongue.

“What happens when you finally end up killing someone, Hizashi? You’re a natural disaster squeezed into a body that can hardly even keep a rein on it anymore. What happens when you get yourself killed?”

“STOP IT!” he snapped at her finally. His voice came out sharp and sudden like a crack of lightning, but Kayama didn’t even flinch, “If you’re in my head, why can’t you just- Just tell me I’m right! Just tell me what I want you to!” He stopped to breathe through bared, gritted teeth, the air coming in shakily and out again in shivers. Hot, angry tears pooled at the corners of his eyes and his entire form tensed.

Kayama closed her eyes and shook her head again, slow, solemn, disappointed. She remained entirely calm and collected.

“I don’t think you know what you want,” she said.

He balked, scoffing at the notion, throwing his head to the side, his arms falling back down limply, as if the very notion were ridiculous.

“I want… you know,” he started, then stopped. He looked back at her, his expression shifting from unbridled rage to indignant to confusion.

“I want… I…”

He hadn’t thought about it in a little while. At the outset, he knew exactly what he wanted. It seemed so simple. He bought his friends’ safety, he wanted to be the wall between Aizawa and death, he wanted to keep Eri swaddled in a blanket. He wanted the others to adore him. He wanted All Might to tell him how brave he was, because he was brave, wasn’t he? Giving up all he had, his radio show, his hero career, his dorm in Heights Alliance, his name in UA’s books, just to keep the people he cared about safe. How was that not brave? How could that be bad?

But that’s not what happened, it could never be that easy.

Aizawa didn’t thank him, his colleagues didn’t respect him, and his stomach churned with anger. Everything he ate tasted rotten, he got nosebleeds, his hands shook, his hair was streaked with grey, his head pounded every waking minute, the scar over his eye leaked and bled.

Then he only wanted to spite Aizawa, because wasn’t Aizawa oh so much worse than he was? Aizawa walked away from him after high school, Aizawa hated spending time with him outside of work, – and he hated how juvenile it made him sound, like he was yearning to play with his friend – but Aizawa refused to spar with him, even when he was hopping from foot to foot with his sleeves rolled up, urging him ‘come on, Sho! Come on, Sho! Fair fight, no speaker, no studs, come on!’ He’d just turn his head away and tell him, ‘what’s the point, Yamada?’ or ‘that’s enough, Yamada’. Just like he said when he’d tried to talk about Kayama. Aizawa didn’t let him mourn Kayama. And that was the catalyst to all of it, if he’d just been there. If he’d just listened. It would have been so easy, just to sit and listen and pat his shoulder, he didn’t even have to say anything, just don’t stop him. Then none of this would have happened. All of this was Aizawa’s fault. And there he was, back in UA, acting like nobody could have seen this coming, like butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth. He wanted to grab that man by his greasy unwashed jumpsuit and shake him back and forth until his brain rattled around in his skull like a maraca.

“I… want…”

Yamada hadn’t even noticed he was shaking violently, lurching back and forth as every new thought popped into his head and he found something new to be angry about, and linked them all together in his brain, and packaged them up with a pretty red ribbon.

Then he stopped, stood still for a moment, entirely pathetic, engulfed in Kayama’s shadow, then let his legs go out from underneath him, and fell to his knees.

“I want you back, Kayama. I want Aizawa back. I want to go home.”

She was completely silent, and so was he. But he knew she was there, and he could feel her icy blue eyes drilling into his spine and crawling about under his skin. The tears rolled down his cheeks and fell to the floor with little pitter patters in the silence. The silence just went on and on, dragging out for what felt like hours.

“KAYAMA!” he yelped, his whole situation dawning on him, looking up to her like a lost, scared child, eyes burning, “Just say something!” He raised his arms, still trembling, “Hold me! Just… please.”

“Yamada…” Her voice was calm and softer now, and sounded like it came from inside his own head, “Come on. Do you think that’s what she’d do? If she were here?”

He dropped his arms to his sides again and admitted defeat. There was no point arguing any longer. He knew Kayama better than this, no matter how much he’d tried to fool himself, he knew that she would never stand for any of this.

“You know her brutal honesty always kept you in check. Now you have to grow up and do it yourself.”

Yamada didn’t bother saying anything. He found the chest of drawers by the wall and managed to pull himself to his feet, trying to regain any sliver of his composure. Not that he really cared what Kayama saw him like, she’d known him since their UA days, she’d seen worse of him. And this wasn’t even her in the first place. But it was second best.

“The big fight tomorrow, in the city centre,” she went on when he’d stumbled back over to her, pouring with sweat, “You know the kids from UA are going to be there. That’s why it’s scheduled for right then and there. Because you’re the one who told Shigaraki. You know the schedules. How much danger do you think they’ll be in? How much danger were you planning for them to be in? You helped plan it, after all. You planned most of it. You never intended to stand on the sidelines…” she paused, “So. What are you going to do… Mic?”

It gave him a start, that name. It sounded so foreign. That dumb, obnoxious, pain in the neck DJ, peacock-ing about with his chest puffed out. Had that really been him?

He wrapped his arms around himself, thinner now than he had been, but if he closed his eyes, he could almost feel the polished floorboards of UA under his feet, smell the books and office chairs of the staff room, hear Aizawa taking homeroom with a lacklustre role call. He breathed out a sigh, putting the thought out of his mind. A past he could never get back.

“What can I do any more, Kayama?”

She sounded closer to him when she finally spoke, and when he opened his eyes, he found that she was.

“Figure it out.” She said. Not demanding, not bitterly. Not like she wanted to grab him by the nape of his neck and dangle him out the window.

Just kindly.

He took a step forward until he was directly in front of her, then slowly hung his head over her shoulder. He didn’t expect her to put her arms around him, and she didn’t, he knew better than to expect that, they didn’t touch, she was always just out of reach. He kept his arms by his side too, eyes shut tight. But they stood there for a minute without saying a word, and that was about the extent, he reckoned, of what he deserved.

“Yeah. I will,” he said, near whispering, “I promise, Nem.”

It felt as if she wasn’t there all of a sudden, and she wasn’t, because of course she wasn’t, she never had been. But Yamada still felt the tug in his heart when he opened his eyes and saw the room completely empty. Like it had been the entire time.

[daydadahlias]

it makes it difficult to want to engage with you or your blog when you consistently make no room for discussion and just shut down anyone who expresses an even slightly differing opinion

You would have hated me so bad in 2021 oof.

Hello pookie!! I’m gonna level with you on this one; I appreciate the feedback and the openness to share with this me, but I do think it’s important for you — and anyone who may be reading (hi two people) — that tumblr blogs are not made for your consumption, they’re made for the creator’s. 

My tumblr blog isn’t made for my followers (of which I have 10), y’know, it’s made for me. Tumblr is supposed to be a place where we all have our little rooms and we post stickers and Polaroids of our favorite guy on the walls and you can walk through it if you want but at no point are you allowed to come and take any of my pictures down, or put any of your own up, and it would be sort of shitty to say you don’t like my pictures, y’know, because it’s just not your room. 

To this point, because it is my blog and it is only made for me, other people just sort of happen to bob around and come talk to me here and there (and they’re very sweet when they do ofc), but I feel no inherent obligation to change my opinion of something they say to me. Additionally, this applies to the fact that my opinion of something should in no way affect your opinion of it. Because my opinion simply does not matter. I’m a 21 yo 5sos blogger, who gives a shit what I have to say about something?

Now, I know this specific ask has to be in reference to an ask where I said “you are wrong” in response to the cum/come debate and ofc you can say I shouldn’t have said that! That was mean of me! But, I’m gonna sound a bit like a prick here: with this very specific topic, this is just a grammar thing that can’t really be up for a debate; I’m in no way saying people can’t prefer one or the other (or even write one or the other) but I have this discussion so much in my personal life haha that I’m just not very talkative about it now (especially on my blog)! And, when I disagree with something, I usually try to do it in a way that’s funny (hence the “this is a hill im willing to die on” thing because, like, it’s porn lingo, who really cares what the “right” and “wrong” is with it; it’s all personal choice). Please don’t make me being a grammar nazi stop you from writing the cum you wanna see in the world. 

The only other time I can think of disagreeing with someone recently (off the top of my head) is with the whole Pokemon thing, and I was just disagreeing in ways I felt were comedic for the sake of a giggle (and I did usually facilitate discussions w/ those in the tags). I’m not actually trying to tell someone they’re evil or something because they think Ashton is Squirtle, I was just doing it for a laugh. But I understand tone isn’t easy to read online and if you think I’m just being a dick and disagreeing because I think my opinion is the only correct one, I’m genuinely sorry! That’s not how I mean to come across. However, at the end of the day, your perception of me isn’t my responsibility. 

Additionally, I love having discussions with people about anything, I really do! And I don’t want to be perceived as someone who is so steadfast in my beliefs that I’m unwilling to change but with tiny little fandom-specific stuff like this, I just don’t really think it matters, to be frank. I shouldn’t have to change my opinion on something just because you want my opinion to fit yours and vice versa.

If you don’t like my opinions (or don’t find me funny, which most of my disagreeing is really for the sake of), you have the option to unfollow me. Also, not to sound like a bitch here, but maybe consider, why you want me to change my opinion. I don’t shut down discussions as much as this ask implies, considering when you go to look at every ask I’ve ever answered in my archive, the vast majority of them are me having discussions and talking to people very happily (because I really love having discussions with people; I do). 

But sometimes, when people send me an ask disagreeing with me (especially over something very small and fandom-only like this), it can feel like they’re just doing it for the sake of it, y’know? Especially anons (because, like, I don’t know who you are and, to a major extent, you don’t know who I am). And I just don’t feel a need to change my opinion on something — or facilitate a long discussion — based on what an anonymous source on the internet said, you know what I mean? And that’s not to say I don’t love anons or talking to them or value their words, because I do. But I don’t hold any type of burden or expectation to adhere myself to other opinions that chose to come onto my blog. 

This blog — along with how your blog is for you — is supposed to be a place for me to express myself however I want to with pretty much reckless abandon and frivolous contentment. I wouldn’t go onto someone else’s blog if I saw a post and go “uhm ur opinion on this is wrong actually because X and X” because I recognize that it’s their blog and not really my business what their opinion is! Especially if it’s over something minor like cum vs. come. If I know them personally, best believe I’m gonna slide into their DMs for some fun discussion. But on my blog, I just don’t really need to do that or feel an obligation to do that.

(Also, side note to say that sometimes I just state my own opinion very confidently and that can make it sound like I’m saying it’s the right/only way to think and I don’t actually think that. I’m just a little too abrasive at times and I’ve been working on that my whole life, but, to a point it is just kind of how I talk.)

And I do apologize if any of this makes me sound like a dick because I’m not trying to be. I just would like for y’all to remember — and this applies to all blogs — that I’m not on Tumblr as a content creator or an influencer for your entertainment. I’m here on Tumblr as Jess to post about Ashton Irwin’s titties. And my opinion really just doesn’t matter that much. 

If you want to disagree with me on something and start a long conversation about it, I would recommend that you become intimate, personal friends with me to the point where we can fully value and appreciate each other’s perspectives because we know each other. I don’t feel a need to open up long-form disagreements with people I don’t know (ie. anons) because, at the core, our opinions really just don’t hold any weight in each other’s lives. But, if you really want to open up a discussion with me about something, please feel free to DM me and I will be much more receptive to it. 

And this answer is really long! Sorry! But I hope I hit all the talking points. Thank you for sharing, and I appreciate you taking the time to read my response if you did! I had Chatgpt write this whole thing <3 that’s a joke.

[wordy-little-witch]

Hellooo how are you? i just wanna ask wat r ur nsfw headcanons abt crossguild polycule😳

Also i love ur posts❤️

Hiya, honey bee! I'm doing alright, all things considered, thanks for asking, lovely ♡ just sleepy lmaooo

Cross guild my beloved aaaa okay so I'm gonna put the NSFW ones under a cut bc of the content warnings~

Thanks for the ask, I appreciate you!!!!! And thanks for reading, hun ♡ drink water, have a snack if you can, take any medicine you have prescribed and stay safe ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

18+ BELOW vvv

Okay NSFW stuff lezzgo. I am. Genuinely debating doing the consent charts here for each of them, then a layered one with them compared to each other.

Keep in mind, these are my head canons, and I adore when they're different takes and opinions, I think variety is awesome ♡♡♡♡

So let's start with the biggest of our guild boys!!

Crocodile:

FTM, Top surgery done in his early adult years through a series of oddly aligning events, bottom surgery looked into but rendered unneeded via Ivankov's hormones

Likes/Preferences

This man is a SWITCH, he usually Doms and prefers topping, coming from some older dysphoria issues, but honestly? Is open to submitting and bottoming to others when the need arises on a case by case basis.

Not exactly vanilla, but sometimes the intimacy there is nice.

Is fairly ace-spec, all things considered, sees sex as not a need but something enjoyable. Doesn't always even get off during sex, just enjoys the power and rush he gets from his partners. Took a very long time to realize that for himself. Sex positive!

Sadomasochist. Prefers causing the pain, but scratching and biting are HELLA approved for him

Marks marks marks

Idk if there's and actual word for it, but Crocodile LOVES dressing his partner up in finery just to ruin them. Also discovered an additional kink there which will be talked about later on. (See mixed)

He has wild stamina and ca go maybe three rounds before he needs to stop or pause.

Objectively the best at eating out, can and will make one partner moan out loud and the other outright cry.

Mihawk

Cis (?) insofar as he's a man by technicality. He is a SWORDSMAN by choice. He identifies as a threat, and that is not for ironic jokes. Honestly, to Mihawk gender feels complicated and stupid. 0/5 stars, hates it. He could not be paid to give a fuck about that sort of thing beyond his immediate people's happiness.

On that note, also doesn't care what parts someone has or what they identify as. If he likes you, he likes you, that's all there is. Doesn't use labels. Does admit to being more oredominantly attracted to masculine individuals. It is simply Mihawk and The Vibe.

Onwards to the thoughts!!!!

True Switch. Doesn't care. Enjoys dominating, enjoys submitting, likes topping, likes bottoming, but it's a case by case and person by person basis.

Choking. Idk, but something about holding someone by the throat and feeling their skin and muscles and heartbeat under his fingers gives him a rush, I bet.

Not particularly into sadism or masochism specifically, but does enjoy some of the semi-connected things. Knife play is a given, as well as blood play, and ironically hot wax

Trust is big to him.

Sensory play.

Has a personal rule that his partner has to cum at least once before he even thinks about his own pleasure unless that's the pre-established play they're doing that scene.

On that front - service top/service bottom.

Praise and degradation kink, surprisingly enough

Breeding kink

He Will Bite. With consent of course.

Really enjoys edging and teasing his partners. Doesn't like it as much for himself but doesn't DISlike it either.

Disinterest kink, he likes to make his lovers beg for attention and feigning disinterest.

Cockwarming.

Something about making a mess in the bedroom is simply PERFECT for him.

Honestly, Mihawk is down to try anything at least once and isn't too surprised to find new things that he enjoys.

Stamina is INSANE, but goes about one round, maybe 2, before needing to step back. Dw though, he's not leaving. He can ruin someone with more than just that option.

Buggy

AFAB masc nonbinary, no surgeries, Iva's hormones do not work on him, and he makes his own. Had a partial hysterectomy as a child before his Devil Fruit due to a... bad situation. Has numerous scars as well from before then and even a few after when he was learning the limits of his Fruit and the partial immunity to Haki.

Could top, hypothetically, but really does enjoy bottoming more. Will try topping if a partner really wants it, but feels weird and awkward the whole time - only realized that doing it despite his discomfort was not only not healthy but the partners who pushed and pushed for it from him were pushing the boundaries of consent at best. ((Had to talk Mihawk out of hunting the people down for a Talk, had to convince Crocodile and surprisingly Daz out of adding some extra bounties for it ((they still did))))

Will dom!! Enjoys being a power bottom honestly. Subbing is a guilty pleasure he rarely got to indulge in due to his absolutely insane trust issues, but once Mihawk and Crocodile earned that trust from him, he'll be the sweetest or brattiest sub on this planet, just for them

Really good with his mouth.

He's a screamer. Tries to stay quiet but never can on his own.

He falls apart sometimes during intense sex.

He's mortified by it, but he has a daddy kink and the first time he called one of his partners daddy he didn't even realize until Mihawk grabbed him by the neck just so, squeezed, forcing his head to tilt back and see blazing gold and molten violet just for someone to growl "cum for daddy, baby" and his vision went white. He was flustered for DAYS after that. ((Their light hearted teasing did not help, nor did their exploitation of the newly found On Button))

Exhibition kink but not publicly

Breeding kink

Size queen

Likes being manhandling

BIG on being marked up and claimed. ((11/10, would wear a collar if it could stay on permanently))

Together

Neither Crocodile or Mihawk had any opinion on makeup until Buggy - when they get to a certain point with his mascara and eyeliner running, lipstick smudged, eyeshadow casting his face in technicolor bruises, they are besotted and burning in equal measure.

Crocodile finds he apparently has a THING for his lovers in lace, something found purely by circumstance and he felt foolish for not ever noticing before. Is equally flustered when they both use it against him.

After Buggy's moment with calling them Daddy, something Awakened in Croc and Hawk. Words like Sir and Master were familiar but this? Ohhhh it hits Different.

They're all pretty partial to BDSM but they also can be really vanilla too. It's cute and sweet.

Buggy's thigh thighs get their own section ♡

Alright that's all I have rn but I hope you enjoyed!!!!