#my only regret is that I don't make enough fanart of them to show my love and support

[deeveedoodle]

Today's not a good day...

I just wish nothing but the best to both of them 🧤📗

I'm just so hurt...

[calamari-inari]

"... you become what you believe."

Dimitri and AM!Ferdinand mini doujin, 7 pages. Read right to left!

Transcript and personal captions under the cut

CW: blood

Comic transcript. Thoughts/monologues are in parentheses. Background dialogue is in brackets.

PAGE 1

D: Ferdinand.

D: I've been wanting to ask you a question...

F: (He looks like a demon..!)

F: Yes? What is it? Please speak properly...

PAGE 2

D: Why did you leave the Empire?

D: I remember how you were during our time at the Officers Academy.

D: You placed so much pride in your heritage.

F: What is the use of pride if I have nothing left?

F: The former Duke Aegir was dismissed. My title, my land... They are all gone now.

D: ...It's because of that woman.

D: Tell me, what do you seek?

PAGE 3

F: I am not sure I understand.

D: Last night, I entrusted one task to you.

[P-please! I'll tell you what I know!]

F: Yes. I killed the Imperial soldier as you had instructed me.

D: That is what I mean.

D: You are simply following my orders.

D: You did not want to kill him, correct?

F: Dimitri, he had vital information for us and you did not let him finish!

PAGE 4

D: Anyway, similarly, I also lost the throne. I have little care for that, however.

D: Now, I'm fighting with a single mission: avenging the dead. They will not be satisfied until I have her head.

F: *sigh* You had said that, but you should not accept that as true.

D: What rubbish. Anyone that deserves to die will die.

F: Dimitri! That is-

PAGE 5

D: Silence, Ferdinand!

D: This hatred and regret I feel... Nothing I do will ever be enough until that witch is gone.

D: What are you-

PAGE 6

D: ... Hmph. What a pest you are.

D: Why do you insist on staying by my side? As you used to closely affiliate with that woman, I could easily kill you here and now.

F: You do not wish to, do you? Because your heart says otherwise. Learn to forgive yourself.

D: But do I deserve forgiveness? The guilt that weighs down on me is...

PAGE 7

F: Dimitri, while I may have left the Empire behind, my nobility has not dulled.

F: Create the grandest vision for yourself because you become what you believe. Do you understand? It is a noble's duty to support you until the end, no matter how far you may stray.

F: That is why I am here for you.

💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡

I don't really draw comics often, but this was certainly worth the effort!! I've always thought Ferdinand is the greatest support character ever, and with him joining the Blue Lions, his role won't change. Just like in the stories of Pan and Loog, Ferdinand would choose to help Dimitri on his path to become the restoration king of Faerghus without ever taking any credit. It's quite evident in his character based on some of his paired endings. I just think that's one of the things that makes them so great and sweet 🥺 I imagine Ferdinand wouldn't hate Edelgard in AM, but rather, he wants to show her that he's able to support his lord (Dimitri) in a way that she never would have thought of. After all in AM, Edelgard only ever knew his snobby academy version who would always childishly rival her.

Please let me know if you liked it!! I'm definitely creating more fanart of these two (maybe a little more intimate next time because I want to lol 🫶)

[kaledya]

HOWDY!!🌟🌟 I haven't been active on Tumblr for a long time, to be honest I haven't been active on any platform until recently.

I think it would be right to make a small update and let my followers know what's on my mind.

(And a little note, I am writing this article from a translation. If there is a mistake in any sentence or if it sounds rude, I sincerely apologize.)

First of all, I would like to talk about why I am  less active than before.

I don't want to go into too much detail about it, so I'll keep it short, and it'll be easier for you too!

I have a disease that worsens with stress, and I can say that this disease has leveled up because I have been stressed a lot lately due to some events.Now, for no reason or if I put too much pressure on that arm area my joints and arm start to ache. This means I can't draw for 2-3 days.In general, it means that I try not to use my arm too much.

But don't worry, thanks to my doctor I'm getting better quickly and I don't have as much ache anymore, much less! Almost gone now!!🌟🌟🌟🎉

And besides these, I was trying to get accepted to the university, but I learned that my drawing skills were not enough for the animation university!( I knew this actually, my anatomy is really bad but I wanted to try my luck) It's a little sad, but I'm not discouraged!🫡

 (I think my only regret was that my arm started to hurt in the middle of the exam after I had come such a long way. Why on earth would anyone make two one and a half hour art exams back to back??) Show some mercy to the students!!)😭😭

༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽

I just need to focus on more art skills  and I will do that!! From now on, I will focus only on improving myself and my arts! YIPPE!!

About  HH SS AU or My's OC development

It saddens me to say this, but even though I've been drawing in the HazbinHotel fandom for months, I've lost my inspiration at the moment.I probably won't be able to share any content about HazbinHotel until I regain my inspiration because I can't think of an idea or get excited about series anymore.But of course this is a temporary thing, my fandom had faded before but then it blossomed again!!

This is valid for SSAU as well, I don't have any inspiration to develop AU or draw for AU right now. 

And thank you very much to my followers who have liked and supported my HazbinHotel content so far!!!

Same goes for my OCs, I'm putting my OCs like Constantine and Serenity and the archangels on the shelf for now.Of course I will use them again in the future when I get inspired about them again, I love my babies!

About SSAU inspired fanfics Thank you again for loving this AU and for being inspired to write your own fanfic!!!

It makes me really happy to see you having fun And it makes me proud to see that I inspire people!! 

But from now on I don't prefer to use my HH OCs to write Fanfics,There are a few reasons for this but the main one is that I can't give you much feedback anymore and I wanted you to know that and I really don't want to upset or disappoint anyone when it comes to feedback.

Of course the fics about SSAU that have been written so far can continue, I have no problems with them, have fun!! I just want you to know I won't be able to give feedback  to you, or it will take a long time 

 This is of course temporary, I will let you know when I return to this fandom or change my mind about this!!

Some people ask about YouTube, I don't plan on posting any content on YouTube anytime soon.

Thank you in advance for respecting my opinions!

In short, yes, these are what I was going to say. It can be said that I have switched to the Gravity Falls fandom at the moment and I am sort of making my childhood dream come true by giving fanart to this fandom.And this is something that makes me very happy. 

Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!

[onnahu]

Batkids as AO3 users

Dick - I don't think he'd be a writer. He just don't give me the vibes, ya know? He would, however, read fics about people he knows. And himself. He's deep in superhero fandom, and at some moment he gets super invested in some rarepair and actually menages to set them up. I also think as a teenager he would stumble upon some E rated fic for someone he knows, then promise himself he'd never touch it again, and then a few years later he reads them a lot, is just super secretive and guilty about it. He does not, however, touch Batman E rated fics with a ten foot pole.

Tim - you'd think he'd write Hero RPF, huh? No. He's deep into Formula 1 RPF. He writes, he reads, he's just very active in fandom. Most of his works are some kind of Formula 1 murder mystery.

Jason - he is the one from Hero RPF. He doesn't read it, he just writes it. In various AU's, ranging from some inspired by his crazy adventures to those from classic literature. When he was still Robin, he wrote Pride and Prejudice Superbat fic, that became crazy popular. After ressurection he sweared he wouldn't touch it, but after checking it out once and realising how tragic his writing style was, he rewrites the whole thing. He reads fics from fandoms he does not know the original works of. He finds a fic he likes, and learns things from it. Then he spirals deep into fandom. Like many of Batfam fans I imagine. That's why he doesn't write, because he feels he can't without knowing the original, and he sure as hell ain't watching some kids show called Ben 10.

Babs - I think her beginnings were in something like Twilight of DCU. She would regret it forever. Currently she's involved in some shows she watches when on break from work and Oracle. I'm not really into TV series but maybe something like Bridgertons or The Boys or something like that. She writes only one-shots and is active on Tumblr. She has like a thousand bookmarks and she posts fic recs with the most wild analysis of writing style, plot consistency and just vibes. She stays away from any RPF's, but esoecially Superhero RPF. She's got it enough on day to day basis thank you very much.

Steph - that girl post Robin writes the most sick gore body horror fics change my mind. And she does it in fandom's you would least expected. She also writes Spoiler/Batgirl fics, that are really fluffy but also full of action and actually made the pairing wildly known.

Cass - she reads everything Steph writes for Spoiler/Batgirl. Steph does not know Cass knows she writes them. Cass is really charmed. She tried writing one, but it came out really dark and she didn't like how clumsy it was and gave up on trying to be an author. She reads heavy angst, crack, or Steph's Spoiler/Batgirl fics, nothing else. She's the person that leaves very short but very sweet comments on literally averything she likes.

Duke - that boy is in the same circles as both Tim and Dick. He actually finds out it's Tim that writes his favourite Formula 1 fics as Tim finds out it's Duke that leaves those super insightful comments on them that start's conversations with author and other readers. They have one talk about it and then forcefully forgets about it and continues as it was. He writes Batman and Robin and Robin Gang fics. He's really good at it, and that's how he found Duck Grayson. Not that any of them knows that's the other on the other side of the screen. And yes, he's Steph's beta reader, and she's his. They don't talk about it, it's just how it is.

Damian - he reads Batman and Robin fics but only about himself. He also draws fanart and makes comics about Batman and Robin (himself). Later he gets involved in Teen Titans fandom, then the Justice League one, and suddenly he's a wildly known fanartist in the whole Hero RPF community. And he did draw a fanart for Jason's fic ones. They both don't know it's the other. He also gives aby superhero an emotional support fictional pet. Dick think it's adorable. (He was the one that introduced Damian to fandom.)

[bythepen98]

My childhood ship❤

I love them so much and seeing snippets of their relationship in the new series is heartwarming.

.

(Ignore the rest if u don't want an essay. Might regret this when i wake up tomorrow idk)

.

.

.

They'll always have a special place in my heart. I do acknowledge the criticisms I see from other fans about the pairing (and of Sakura's character in general bc the writer apparently sucks at writing women?) but I also don't know if I have the right to say anything against it as someone who only watched the og years ago as a kid on TV and not shippuden. Didn't have Internet and I don't think the series popped up in cartoon network or animax so I eventually forgot about it. Now the length alone is too intimidating and I barely watch shows in general anymore, so most of my shippuden knowledge are actually from all the fics I've been reading. I just want to like the pairing as they are and my younger self would've been screaming/crying in happiness if she'd seen these shots.

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On a different note, I grew to love Naruto in general again after taking the plunge to read the fics (before that I've been binging hp fics). Maybe not enough to watch the show or read the manga, but enough to love the characters themselves and their relationship with each other. I want to draw more fanart of them but there's also that hesitance where I feel like a poser since I don't know the shippuden canon context like other fans. I feel that way with other shows that I've watched but never finished, and with genshin too(I tried playing once but it was too big for my phone and pc. Plus I'm just not that kind of gamer. Still want to draw some of the characters). I'm not sure if I'm making any sense but this thought has been bugging me for awhile and I just wanted to express it out loud. Maybe there are other content creators like me too who only watched a [small] part of a show or game but adored the characters enough to draw/write multiple pieces of it.

[beepborpdoodledorp]

i'm sorry i'm going through another phase again i just need to get this out of my system or i'm gonna explode. i can't remember if i posted it on both here and instagram or just instagram but either way i've told this story before but i'm telling it before out of…necessity i guess?? accountability?? some sort of imposter syndrome i've developed from it?? back when i was 12 or so i got into this ship that was relatively popular in the fanbase but was controversial due to the age discrepancy between the characters - some wikis and firsthand sources said one of the characters was underage, others said they were of age (14 to be 16 by the sequel and 16 to be 18 by the sequel respectively). i've always been vehemently antiship or whatever the hell it's called and believed that within the context of the story it wouldn't make sense for the character to be as young as some sources say they were, a belief which only got further enforced when i was i think either 13 or 14 and got really involved with the current fandom at the time here on this website, with creators and supports of the ship that I admired putting together entire essays and shit digging through decade-old interviews to show that the character was of age. and i believed it! i was in this fandom and ship for like 3-4 years and during that time i drew fanart after fanart, wrote fanfic after fanfic, i fucking wrote smut, because i trusted the creators i looked up to and thought the detractors just didn't do enough research. surprise! i had my head completely up my own ass and was so balls deep in denial i don't even know what i was thinking. i had already started to stray from the fandom in mid-2022 or so and after i got a comment on a fanfic i had written like a year earlier showing me a more recent interview that confirmed the character to be underage everything just came crashing down. i deleted every fanfic i had published, basically went radio silent on my main blog before deleting or archiving all of that too. i haven't touched the fandom for that game ever since and that brings us to today, where i'm once again writing about it because i…almost feel like i haven't had enough accountability taken for it?? i don't feel like a deserve all these followers, i don't feel like i deserve this platform, because i don't feel like a lot of these people would follow me if they knew what i had done. if i was in their shoes, would i follow someone who half-wittingly made (occasionally nsfw) content of a proship when they were young? i probably wouldn't, no matter how much they regret it, and i certainly wouldn't feel comfortable with them being in the fandom again. that's why i wish so desperately i could delete my main blog because that's where everything happened and i wish i could just put it behind me. but that's the thing, am i sweeping all of this under the rug by almost never mentioning this and deleting all the content, or am i taking accountability by deleting everything i made so it can't be accessed by younger people like i was at the time? i don't know. some days i give myself leniency by saying i was a young teenager, a minor myself who was misled by adults i looked up to and took accountability when i was proven wrong, other days i feel like a hypocritical monster who had his head too up his own ass to acknowledge his mistakes until i had gone off the deep end. i don't feel like i deserve this blog, or this platform, or the creative spaces i've been given, not with everything muddling my past, no matter how young or easily impressionable i was, not with the knowledge i could've easily influenced other young and easily impressionable creators like me who looked up to me and just made a horrible cycle. i don't know. i'm sorry for all this word vomit, and i'm sorry for being an idiot

[fuyukogomesu]

Last X Night X Blimp

Hi! I decided to try to translate some of my fanfiction into English, like a kind of self challenge and make my fanfic be potentially more approachable (?) for other people. This being said, if something doesn't make sense or is poorly worded, I would be thankful if someone tell me so and explain why.  Summary: On the dirigible they had taken in order to go to NGL, the group of friends was resting. At least one half of them did, the other half was awake, thinking about what would they find there. Ponzu decided to go for a walk to clear her mind and ended up crossing paths with Pokkle. They began to discuss near a window, contemplating the starry sky. Genre: Romance Characters: Ponzu, Pokkle Rating: K You can also read it on wattpad Obviously Hunter x Hunter is not mine, and the fanart neither (I found it in pinterest, but I don't know the artist). The fic may spoil if you have not finish Kimera Ants arc. If it's okay then I hope you enjoy my fanfic!

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It was night, the stars were already high in the sky, with the moon by their side. Brighter than diamonds, they brought softness to the dark sky. Despite this natural show everyone was asleep, a well deserved rest. At least that's what she thought. After all, she was in a different room than the guys. And therefore couldn't guise what were they doing.

After deciding to leave for NGL, they searched how to get to Republic of Rokario as quickly as possible. They noticed that the blimp, that they had time to take, and would arrive the first there, departed from a city located not far away from where they were. So they had to take a train, and then run in order to don't miss the blimp.

The fact that Pokkle was already a hunter helped them a lot, specially because the airship was first class. The group of friends was aware of that before deciding to take it, but they still got surprised by this luxury, and by the fact that the blimp had a room for each passenger or group of passengers. Sure they were only small rooms but still!

The boys stayed together and that was how Ponzu found herself alone, separated from her friends. That didn't really annoy her, after all, it was past midnight. What bothered her was the sleep that didn't seem to come to her. But she knew perfectly the reason for that.

She'd been staring at the ceiling for a long time, lying on the futon, her hat put down at her left. She was thinking, her head full of thoughts. She was wondering what could been waiting for them in NGL. Was the danger that great? Despite that she had begun to learn how to use of nen, her learning was far from being over, she was fully aware of that. She was sure her bees would be a great help for them. But what if in the middle of a battle she was completely useless? When she said she would go with the group, all of this crossed her mind, but didn't worry her that much. So why now? Could it be because the time to find out if either all this was true or false was approaching? No it wasn't that. It was rather a hunch. As if something inside her was telling her that it was not such a good idea to go there. But despite this feeling she didn't want to leave, nor did she regret staying with the group. She wanted to go and accompany Pokkle and the others. She didn't regret her choice.

Having enough tormenting herself with these ideas, she decided to get up and ramble in the blimp, without even taking her hat. She was hoping to be able to clear her head, so she started walking through the dark corridors. Some lights were on but did not light up the dark greatly, and the space between them, although variable, was most of the time rather large. The silence reigned supreme, letting the young woman hear her footsteps and those of one of the airship's staff, the only person she met.

After wandering the halls decorated with beautiful vases containing gorgeous flowers, benches, and some paintings of various genres and currents. She stopped in surprise when she saw a figure sitting on one of the benches next to a window, its gaze turned towards the night sky. Ponzu blushed a little, she had no trouble recognizing this silhouette. Sitting facing the window was Pokkle. The darkness seemed to drift away from him thanks to the soft light emitted by the moon and the stars. This same light that gave him a slightly lighter and bluish complexion, which went perfectly with his state. He was thinking, lost somewhere in his thoughts.

In front of this image she couldn't help thinking how handsome he was. So much more than all these decorations, and even than the floral arrangement that stood by the bench where his friend was siting, composed of blood red higanbanas, blue flaxes and yellow ones in the middle of white gerberas and some red roses. So caught up in her thought, she had no time to notice that suddenly, a pair of brown eyes landed on her. Right after a soft voice, that she knew well, brought her back to earth.

«Ponzu...» With only this word, she stopped blushing and finally noticed that the young man was now staring at her. «S-Sorry, I didn't want to bother you. -Don't worry, you don't bother me.» They smiled at each other and she approached him. «You can't sleep either?» He questioned as she sat down next to him. «No, I have a bad feeling about what awaits us there. -Do you regret following us?»

He hadn't finished his sentence yet, that she was already shaking her head from side to side in reprobation. Before continuing to speak she turned to the window to contemplate the heavens.

«No, I am still convinced that my bees will be useful to you. But we don't know what we will find. What if during a fight I turn out to be a burden more than anything else? If I can't fight or even support you...?! I wonder if I will be able to help you in another way, or if all I will be able to do is send messages... -Stop! -Huh.» She said turning back to him. «Even if it was the case, which I don't think, that will already be a great help. I thank you for that, you're the only one who can assume this role, I don't know how we would do if you weren't with us... -Pokkle...» She whispered with her cheeks a bit rosy as he smiled at her. «I mean, I say that but, I'm not in the best position to speak.» He replied looking away as they stopped smiling. «Me too, I keep thinking about what we'll find out there. I wonder if I'd be up to it, if I would be able to protect all of you in case of danger. And what if it gets too dangerous, will I be able to get you out of NGL safely? What if one of you die there? I-I-I would never forgive myself... -Don't say that!» She said taking his hand and smiling at him. «You know? If I'm able to go despite everything I've just told you, it's because you'll be there. I have full confidence in you.» She spoke smiling with a little blush, making the boy's cheeks warmer.

After laughing a bit for his reaction, she looked at the stars one last time before closing her eyes slowly. She then let herself fall to her left, until her head rested on Pokkle's shoulder, who surprised, widened his eyes. But he didn't pull away or push her away either. Instead he observed her.

She looked serene, her flushed cheeks gave her a really cute side, and her lips formed a beautiful and sincere smile. He had always found her beautiful. His cheeks became redder when he realized that they were still holding hands. But that didn't mean he wanted to let her go, quite the contrary.

Maybe I should finally tell her... After a last look at her he resumed his thoughts. Yes it's decided, if I am able to protect her at NGL, then I will confess my feelings to her.

He stared at the sky again, leaning to his right. Once his head rested on Ponzu's, he closed his eyes. They stayed like that for a while: in the dark, in a soft and comfortable silence, enjoying each other's presence... Unaware that this would be their last moment of intimacy.

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Hope you liked it (and that it was understandable)! Maybe I will translate more of my fics in future, I think it really could be good for improving my Enghlish. But I didn't write any other with this two characters.

Anyway, thanks for reading!

[xiu21chen99]

hxh headcanon/imagine.

again... still about hisoillu but about their engagement instead of illu's influenced fashion choice.

also this is more of... idk it gave reason why they chose to marry instead of uh other ways i guess??

i've seen so many fanarts where illu would break the news to the zoldycks or how killu would react to having hisoka as his brother in law- like srsly it's meme worthy at this point- and lotsa ones that showed how hisoka proposed as a joke or smtg but... I've been overthinking abt it these past few days sO i present to you how i think "the big question aka the proposal" happened... (manga spoilers??)

it's after hisoka resurrected himself obviously, and def after he killed kortopi and shalnark (so he knew there was gonna be empty slots in the spiders' lineup)

i imagine illu went back to the zoldyck estate after the whole fiasco and only heard of hisoka's "death" from rumors while he was on a mission

and then when he was idk maybe contemplating on whether or not he should visit the body(?) to pay respects or something, he gets a text message from the devil himself

their text went like this probably:

hisoka: hey~ where are you right now?♠️ (and no u can't tell me hisoka doesn't text w card suits u just can't-)

illumi: who are you and how did you get the phone you are currently using?

hisoka: ooh~ illu~ i feel betrayed, did you delete my number?♣️

illumi: hisoka is dead

hisoka: *image attached*

illumi: oh

illumi: hello hisoka, how are you still alive?

hisoka: you sound disappointed~♦️

illumi: i kind of am...

hisoka: rude, just tell me where you are♥️

...and that's how they met up?? ngl i think illu has a know-it-all syndrome where he just has to,,, k n o w everything

he's curious so he agrees to the meetup ofc

he's also surprised when he sees hisoka is in good shape when they meet (idk at a bar in an unknown city?)

they drink whiskey on the rocks because... you know...

hisoka explains how he survived and his next plan of action (which is terminate the spiders)

illumi makes a mental note of nen after death bc he's heard and seen it all before but... not to this extent,

this is gonna be,,, bland but i think this is the logic behind why hisoka chose to get married/engaged instead of just paying up front (reference to the ten dons' commission to get chrollo killed and chrollo's commission to get the ten dons killed)--

anyways here's how their conversation goes:

i: "why did you want to talk in person?"

h: "oh y'know, for old times sake."

i: "...right"

hisoka laughs, "okay so maybe i want to ask you for a favor..?"

confused, illumi asks, "why could you not have just texted if you wanted me to kill someone for you?"

h: "no, no- wait, actually, you're not too far off."

i: ~mOrE cOnfUsiOn~ "huh?"

h: "how do contracts for assassination work in your... family business?"

i: "half the promised pay before, the remaining half afterwards. should the target be eliminated by a third party, the assigned zoldyck still gets the pay and should the employer die, then the contract is terminated and the zoldyck will report back immediately."

h: "and has anyone made a contract to have themselves terminated?"

i: "i beg your pardon?"

h: "what complications will arise should your employer's target be... themselves?"

i: "i believe... i have never encountered such circumstance before. the people who hire us are those who have enough money and resource to have their enemies killed quickly. no one's tried to test the zoldyck assassination prowess."

h: "so... how will that work?"

i: "are you implying this is the reason why you have contacted me today?"

h: "yes~ ♥️" (how he said a heart emoji out loud is up to you, reader)

i: "it will be a pointless paradox. logically, the zoldyck will only get the employment bill. and i, myself, do not find pleasure in going for the kill like you lest i get my reward, so you will not get a contract out of me, hisoka."

h: "is there no leeway?"

i: "a zoldyck stands up to their word. so no."

h: "even for a friend?~ ♦️"

i: "we are not friends, hisoka-"

hisoka raises his glass of whiskey along with his eyebrow.

i: "oh..."

h: "didn't you tell dear killua that a zoldyck didn't need friends?"

i: "you... are an associate, someone reliable in the killing world. it's different."

h: "hypocrite"

i: "i ask you for favors and you make me return them. it is not like we spend our time together leisurely like killu with that island boy..."

hisoka clinks their matching glasses of whiskey even though his is already empty, a shit-eating grin on his lips.

i: "you suggested we meet here."

h: "this isn't the first time we went out to drink, right illu?"

i: "regardless!! i will not kill you just for half the money. i do not like wasting efforts on fruitless missions."

h: "as i said, is there no exception, to make sure you get my money if you were to succeed in killing me?"

i: "are you doubting my skill, hisoka?"

h: "that's not the point right now~ ♠️"

i: "wait, why do you want me to get all of your money?"

h: "haven't we just gotten over this subject? because you're my friend, of course."

i: "i... we are not friends, hisoka."

hisoka claps, "that's it! illumi!! ♣️"

i: "eh?"

h: "marry me! that way in our prenup I'll make sure you get all of my money, and even without a prenup you'll still get it since you'll be my only relative! that solves it!"

i: "hisoka, are you sure death did not took a toll on your brain? you did say you used Bungee Gum only on your heart and lungs..."

h: "i'm being serious, illumi!! and doesn't this solve your earlier conflict? we don't have to be friends, we'll be husbands!"

i: "do not use that tactic with me, you manipulative bastard. stop joking."

h: "this is purely beneficial for you, honestly i don't get why you just won't accept it."

i: "then humor me this first, why now?"

h: "dear illu, i've been to literal hell and back. i think it's time to leave my mark in case i fail to escape death again."

i: "was it that bad?"

h: "you'll love it there, illu~ ♥️"

h: "on a more serious note, though, i do plan to marry you. out of everyone i've encountered, you're the most eligible candidate. you're powerful, fully capable and extremely pretty to boot! you're the ideal husband!"

(blushing obviously, illumi downs the remaining whiskey in his glass) i: "death has changed you, hisoka."

h: "so?"

i: "fine."

h: "excellent!"

and in one fell swoop, illumi has a pin against the curve of hisoka's jugular, wrist held tightly by hisoka- a card matching against his own neck.

"not yet, dear husband." hisoka whispered into his ear, "we have to manage the papers first. and i've a request before you do."

they let each other go at the same time, not even breathing an unnecessary breath in the other's personal space (well, they're nearly pressed thigh to thigh anyways, what's the point of personal space anymore-)

"a condition rather than a request, really."

"what?" hisoka orders them refills, and downs his when it arrives.

"join the ryodan first."

glass already pressed on thin lips, illumi's confused hum resonates softly into the concave utensil. "why?"

"so things can get more interesting. i assume you know of the dark continent expedition that's soon to take place?"

"father has advised i take part on it, since kalluto told me the ryodan plans to rob some cliches who'll join the expedition- to look after him. you want me to join them?"

"yes, and i plan to board as well, don't fret."

illumi's eyes turn to slits, "how should i know you would be there? i can't take your word when you might just disappear when we've all boarded."

hisoka grins, wide then wider, "you should know by now illu, i plan to avenge my wounded pride. that damned chrollo didn't even fight me properly."

tilting his head, illumi stared at the man beside him, "is that not contradictory? i thought you did not mind your opponent using whatever means necessary to win?"

"magicians use tricks and misdirection to awe the audience," hisoka says almost thoughtlessly, "chrollo's a narcissistic hypnotist who used the audience as a damned shield because he knew he couldn't handle me face-to-face."

he groans, tinged in regret. "i shouldn't have picked heaven's arena, if i'd chosen a more discreet location then maybe the damage won't be this bad."

"damage?" illumi rests his chin on his palm, facing his husband.

hisoka swipes a hand over his face, and the glamour comes off. the picture he sent illumi now present in front of him. he was missing a nose, his left hand didn't have any finger left and dried blood chipped on his white skin. "oh."

with another swipe, everything's made correct again. hisoka was grinning again. he downs the remaining alcohol and leaves jenny bills under the emptied glass.

"come, lovely husband. we're to elope and legalize our union!"

illumi follows suit after downing his own glass, "i think there might be another loop hole, if you were to join the family. zoldycks do not kill family."

"so if i were to wed you, here and now, you'd think me more of a family than alluka?"

"alluka is not family."

"are those your words, illumi? or silva's?"

"i..."

"wow, you're really just as fucked up as i am."

"where do you plan to take me? i've just said i cannot kill family."

hisoka chuckles, "then you're the one to take my name, of course."

"preposterous!"

"who the hell still uses that word?"

"i am and will always be a zoldyck-"

"exactly. it's just legal papers, if you kill me then you'll just be a widow and even get your name back! see how everything'll work out in the end?"

"hisoka-"

"are you doubting your skill of assassination, my dearest husband?"

"... i better get the most expensive ring in this damned city."

"that's the spirit! now let's go get married!"

"wait, hisoka. what is your last name?"

later that night, when they leave a chapel, something gold glimmers on hisoka's bungee gum/texture surprise ring finger. a matching one around illumi's finger.

unlike hisoka, though, illumi had an extra red glimmer right under that gold, in the dead center of a silver band of intricately designed pattern. hisoka had foregone the traditional diamond in favor of a 16 carat ruby engagement ring, such a curious choice but illumi accepted it all the same...

(much later on, hisoka took both rings as collateral and reminded illumi that he would get them back even if he died bc it was in their damn prenup- and bc it was technically bought under illumis name and that's how hisoka assured illu that he'd be on that black whale,,, bc he had the rings and planned to give them back to him there)

"I thought a red gemstone was better suited for the rather bloody and murderous ending that our relationship will inevitably come to, wouldn't you agree?"

-Hisoka Morow whenever someone mentions his preference of proposal ring...

"I disagree with most of his ideals, our relationship has always had a fragile foundation, and I knew from the start that we'd eventually end up killing each other."

-Illumi Morow, nee Zoldyck when asked about his thoughts on his husband...

[nobodysuspectsthebutterfly]

Hello! If you don't mind me asking, are you planning on watching House of the Dragon? I'm personally unsure about it. I was cautiously optimistic about it since D&D are not involved, but the recent casting news have been ugh disappointing imo. What do you think?

Hey anon! Sorry to say I kind of mind you asking because my inbox is still closed (to everyone except my secret Santas, which is why the ask page is accessible at all), but then I realized it’s possible if you’re on the mobile app only, you haven’t seen said note in my askbox, or my FAQ, or anything of the sort. And with older metas of mine being reblogged recently, it’s possible you may be confused. (I hope you’re on mobile only and not just ignoring my requests.) So I wanted to inform you of that... but also, y’know, I kind of wanted to make a post about the HotD cast anyway? And this ask is as good a prompt as any... so, you’re lucky, but please don’t push your luck. ;)

So, straight up: I currently have no plans to watch House of the Dragon. HBO is not getting any of my goddamn money, I don’t trust like that. And hunting down illegal livestreaming sites is a pain in the ass and I regret ever doing it for GoT, as well as regretting getting drunk every weekend enough to dampen my senses to ever tolerate that show. Yeah it’s different showrunners and writers, I know. It’s still (mostly) the same executives at HBO and even if the pervert producer is gone (or is he?), you know they still just want to sell sex and violence and dragons to an audience that thinks fantasy is for geeks.

Also, considering that Fire & Blood’s story of Dance of the Dragons has very little actual narrative or dialogue, and the historical record is deliberately untrustworthy, that gives them pretty much full rein to do whatever they like with the story and characterization and words without even being slightly obliged to GRRM at all. Furthermore, since the story is wholly political with virtually none of the magical side of ASOIAF (excepting dragons), and honestly does not have much in the way of themes or depth that main ASOIAF or even D&E has, I think it will be very hard for an adaptation to show even those brief sparks of quality that used to make me wistful GoT couldn’t be that good all the time and eventually just made me frustrated and depressed. Note I do like the history and characters of the Dance despite myself, despite its many many many textual issues, but I don’t need to see an adaptation, I have a very visual imagination. I don’t watch a lot of television to begin with, I don’t see why I should start again with this.

However, I’m not going to avoid spoilers or discussion, and I’ll probably follow the show the tumblr way, through gifsets and video clips and people bitching on their blogs etc. If, somehow, by some miracle of good screenwriting and acting, the show manages to transcend its source material, I’m sure I will be informed. And then, if and only if then, I may try watching. (Without, of course, giving HBO any of my goddamn money.) We shall see.

(Though I certainly don’t know why anyone in Targ standom would ever watch a Dance adaptation considering almost every Targaryen and everyone else in the story is terrible except Helaena and the kids, and considering how the story ends, unless y’all are gluttons for punishment? (I do not comprehend hatewatching, sorry.) It’ll probably be fun at first to see the adventures of those “precious silver douchebags” (to borrow a friend’s tag), but eventually rocks fall, everyone dies, including the girlboss you know you’ll hope the story will be changed enough that she succeeds. Just letting you know now, she won’t.)

That said. I’ve been following the casting news and I think the hate/fear/wild screaming is entirely overblown. Yeah, I know, but wait, just listen. On Friday I officially welcomed @naomimakesart to the “favorite character is now played by an actor who looks nothing like most fanart and is mostly known for wildly different roles” club. I still remember that day in September 2009 when my brother texted me “yarp”... and that right there is the thing. Yeah. Rory McCann looks very little like most pre-GoT Sandor fanart... but many fans grew to love him anyway. (There are some who never did, of course. And yeah the character went off the rails by the end, but truly, who didn’t. Having seen his audition, having spoken to him and heard him wistfully talk about book scenes he loved, I’m convinced if Rory had only been given Sandor’s actual scenes and such, he would’ve killed it. Sigh. Deep, deep sigh.)

And Rory isn’t the only one. Neither of the actors for Jaime and Cersei were considered “beautiful” enough at first. I recall very clearly people bitching about Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (about his nose particularly?) because they had wanted Tarzan-era Travis Fimmel to be Jaime. (Seeing people bitch because current-Fimmel isn’t playing Daemon made me laugh out loud for both BEYONCE?! meme -type “why would you ever cast him omg he doesn’t fit my headcanon Daemon at all”, and amazing amounts of fandom flashbacks.) Lena Headey was “too square-jawed”, “too mean-looking” (since at the beginning you should never be able to guess she’s evil), “too dark-complected”, “too mannish”, not at all attractive enough. (Tricia Helfer was the most common “but I wanted” for Cersei, btw.) And of course “they don’t remotely look like twins, ugh!” Note, there’s receipts for all of this, none of it is made up. (Unfortunately.) Those two actors are just the ones whose casting wank I recall most clearly, particularly because oh how the turn tables.

Also. You know, there’s a post with Matt Smith and Mark Simonetti’s TWOIAF Daemon going around with shrieks of horror... and I’m finding it maddening in a “am I crazy? am I  the crazy one???” way, because Matt looks like the painting. Their features are not that dissimilar.

Same deepset eyes. Same cheekbones of doom. Same thin lips. Same protruding chin. Same high forehead. Same invsible eyebrows ffs. Matt has a squarer jaw, and a longer more rectangular face, and a wider nose, but considering that Daemon’s features are not described in the text, and this is the only official ASOIAF artwork that shows Daemon’s face straight on, I can for sure see why he was probably shortlisted to begin with. And that’s not even getting into to his role in The Crown, which I’ve heard is very well played with politics and palace intrigue... and if you doubt Smith can play seductive/roguish and/or evil (depending on how you LARP as a Westeros historian), or look good with long hair... well. I do not want to watch the movie, but this trailer is disturbingly enlightening.

And as for Rhaenyra... y’all know this show is starting at the beginning of the story, right? When she’s a teenager? Not a voluptuous MILF? Yeah, Emma D’Arcy doesn’t look like a Magali Villeneueve painting (though who does, good lord), but you know who she does look remarkably like? Harry Lloyd.

Same jawline. Same nose. Same thin lips. Same sharp cheekbones. Notably, same kind of sharp cheekbones and deep-set eyes as Matt Smith. HBO evidently has a concept of a “Targaryen look” that’s a little bit quirkier than supermodel-Greek statue-gods on earth, yeah, fine. But it’s consistent, and they look like family, and that-- that is good casting.

And yeah, in a few months to a year or so, you’ll see them in costume and wigs and makeup, you’ll see them in motion and speaking lines, and go Oh. That’s different. Never mind. And while people will make fanart of the show depictions of the characters and those will probalby get popular, they’ll also keep doing fanart of their pre-show headcanons, and those too will be popular. (God knows when I draw or visualize book!Sandor, Rory does not come to mind, lol.) Either way, there’s no reason to panic. We’ll live.

(Though will we live well? Got to wait on the writing and showrunning for that, alas.)

[dorkshadows]

OK I WANTED TO REPLY TO SOME OF YOUR TAGS- this is sneakydraws btw- 1st of all im super happy you liked the ao lie comic and THAT YOU CAUGHT THE PONYTAIL=DRAGONTAIL PARALELL- i wanted to make it more obvious but i couldn’t fit it into the space SO IT’S LOWKEY SURPRISING IT STILL CAME ACROSS... 2nd of all don't EVER think i (or FLB for that matter) could ever get sick of your tags!!! they're so lovely to see!!! if anything we worry that all this fanart is overwhelming, it's a lot i know 😭and finally since you expressed your... intrigue... at the phrase ‘cats hs au’ it’s. it’s a hs au of the characters from the cats musical. as in the og stage musical. which FLB was briefly obsessed with last year and got me into as well. the entire thing is on my blog under the ‘cats hs au’ tag and it’s actually fairly long 😭😭😭idk why the shit she shows me has to be the weirdest most obscure thing 90% of the time but i usually end up loving it so i can’t complain can i!!! ANYWAY im still recivering from ch16 but thank you for your service the western 17jttw fandom is literally like 4 people and yet we have this amazing fic thanks to you!!! xoxo

Hi Hi!! Thanks so much for the message- sorry it took a while to reply! (and I'll be replying your ao3 comments over the weekend!!) I loved the Ao Lie comic. Ah, so glad I wasn't imagining the dragontail thing! It was deliberate and I can't thank you enough :D It came across perfectly imo

I'm really glad you guys aren't annoyed by the long tags! I try to be as detailed as possible because I know how long drawings take (or maybe you guys are geniuses who do 5-second drawings, but it still deserves the appreciation), and getting art of my humble fic is honestly one of the best gifts an author can receive :'D And I needed to let you guys know that I 100% notice and appreciate every detail you put into them. (And no, not overwhelming at all! The opposite of overwhelming! I feel absolutely spoiled by your lovely art and no joke, it's one of the things keeping me motivated throughout the weeks, the possibility of seeing your arts!)

For some reason, I thought the cats HS au was going to be a crack jttw x cats!the musical/movie high school au XD I'm so glad you and FLB vibe on everything- having a friend to share a braincell with you is the best feeling. There is so much power in the obscure and niche asdfasdf It forces you to embrace the inner weirdo. Best of luck on your cats hs au! (love that you specified the stage musical and not the cgi film LOL)

Hope the rest of Act 2 is treating you well ;) And ahh, it's my pleasure. When I first started posting that fic, there were virtually no readers (I vividly remember receiving my first comment on ch. 6, and my sworn bro earl supporting me by reviewing the one and only platonic chapter involved! #loveyoubro) but for once in my life, that didn't stop me LMAO Suntang took over my soul like nothing else ever had that year (and it continued through 2018, and would have continued if not for the pandemic alas), and I kept publishing anyway. I regret nothing!

Seriously an honor to know you enjoy the fic, and thank you for your service to our 17!fandom of +/- 4. And hopefully I can finally finish the fic up in the near future!

[aime187]

A Bit of Rambling and Overthinking (as I always do, to myself, unfortunately), and A First Step (that I rarely take) [About Fanarts & Self-doubts]

Umm, so... I am trying to draw fanarts of Markiplier... To test myself, to push my limits, I guess..?

And uhh... I did... Two as of right now, and two more as WIPs...

I've only show them to my friends on Discord servers, so I thought that... I want to try to post them here... But, umm... I'm scared..? Anxious..? Nervous..? I mean, I've drawn and post fanarts online before, but... I don't know... Maybe I just feel like my art isn't good enough, decent enough or something..?

So, umm... I'm just gonna put this WIP of an attempt at drawing Damien (...I just missed him...) here and not going to put the usual tags... Like I'm just gonna put: my art, fanart, digital art, WIP... I'm not going to put Damien the Mayor tag because it's still a WIP... After I post this one of course...

So, yeah... First step... Why not..?

I just hope I will not regret making this post and that WIP post...

[tryharder-bitch]

Stranger Things: could Robin be bi?

Since season 3 aired, I have seen all sorts of discourse about wether Robin is gay or bi and well, time to add my own two cents.

In my opinion, Robin being a lesbian was one of the best trope subversion of this season. Her being Steve’s love interest would have been predictible and rather boring. Instead, Steve is finally allowed to have a friend of his age without the complications of it being a love story! It shows that you can find happiness in other ways that romantic love! And she was very well written, not reduced to her sexuality but fleshed out as an actual interesting character, useful to the plot! So yeah, I'm glad they went for it.

Of course, Robin and Steve have a great chemistry and they would make a cute couple - but then Joe Keery has chemistry with pretty much everyone, that's just this little man's magic.

And of course, Robin could be bi irl. Sexuality is fluid after all, and even though she rejected Steve, there is a tiny possibility that she could still be attracted by him and yada yada yada.

But it would be a major faux pas to make this her storyline. Why, you ask me?

Stranger Things is a Netflix show airing in 2019. Honestly, it was even a bit surprising that we had to wait until season 3 to have some queer rep. We’re in an era in entertainment where diversity is widely reclaimed by at least a part of the audience. Netflix is run by (mostly) smart people who are eager to answer those demands - in order to, ya know, make money (not that I think they don’t care for representation, but tbh they’re here to sell in the first place).

Right now, Robin is the only canon queer character in Stranger Things (I'm not counting Will, because even though it's pretty obvious that he has some sexual identity conflicts going on, the duffers could still chose not to follow through with that plotline). And when you have the opportunity to show the only gay character in your show be happy in a gay relationship, you can't put her instead in a seemingly “straight relationship”. That would pretty much erase her queerness in the eye of the casual watcher - a sort of "she's queer but dont worry, not that much" (i know her being canonically bi and in a relationship with Steve wouldn't make her straight, please don't @ me and keep on reading).

I would love to see more bi rep in fiction, believe me. And I would be glad to have a bi character in Stranger Things, as long as they're well written.

But as much as I regret this, most people have an easier time understanding homosexuality than bisexuality. Bisexuality is still in this grey zone with lots and lots of misconceptions, whereas nowadays most people get the fact that you can be gay - even of they don't approve it. Therfore if you want to add queer rep in a show, you're probably wanting to begin with something simple, easy to understand. So boom, you choose the gay character!

I feel like the duffer brothers are using Robin to test the waters. If people are happy with her storyline, good, they can add more rep, and if people don't like her being gay... well, she's not that important to the plot, so they can gently push her aside. I think the duffers know their audience and care more about pleasing the mass than writing a specific story they absolutely want to tell - which is both a good and a bad thing, maybe I'll write a post about it. But if they decide to keep Robin (and she's very cool and people love her so I'm pretty sure they will), they are clever enough to exploit her queerness in order to give us a compelling sense of representation.

Now, if you want to ship Stobin, write fanfictions, draw fanarts of them, of course you're free to do it. That's what fandoms are for, so enjoy!

Just don't act like it's canon (because it's not) and don't hope it will become canon (because it won't).