#n get afraid of how it reflects on my reality.

[anki-of-beleriand]

A heart Made of Glass ch. 13

Summary: Ten years ago you left Wanda and the Avengers to heal your broken heart. You never stopped being a hero, just as you never stopped being in love with her. But life had to go on.

Now, after all that time, she is back and with her is a young woman needing help and an enemy that may not be as afraid as Wanda to lay a claim on you.

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x Powered!F!Reader - Scarlet Witch x PoweredF!Reader - Past Wanda Maximoff x Vision

Warnings: Angst, drama, mentions of cheating, fluff, violence, smut, Switch!Reader, internalize homophobia, hurt, comfort, Wanda being a complete mess, anger management issues, jealousy, Requited/Unrequited love, idiots in love, swearing, mentions of alcohol. More tags as the story progess.

Author's Note: This story is a continuation of Dirty Little Secret I was really surprised at the response I got for the story, I did all the tags you guys ask for but if I forgot someone please do not hesitate to tell me. Thank you for the support.

Oh, I am back and this chapter is a wrap-up for the confrontation between Reader and Wanda. They had been given a moment of solitude before going back to their own reality, can they really get past through everyting that happened to them in the past?

Please, do remember English is no my mother tongue so forgive my grammar, spelling and funny mistakes.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 Chpter 12 - Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Can we change the past?

You never imagined this ordeal would end in the way it did.

The universe you left behind came crumbling down under the weight of its own shaky foundations, it became a cold unfitting world that disappear the moment you and the others touched the land of another Universe.

Everything was kind of blurry from the on.

You knew Wanda was taken away, and soon after you were also being carried to a room in which you lost consciousness after your body finally gave up. Your mind didn’t have the time to think about what had happened or what would happen after you were completely recover. You let things happened, and in that time you gave yourself to a blissful mindfulness in which you knew, sooner or later, you would need to face everything you had been running from.

It soon became evident that time was running out, with people coming in and out of your room checking over your physical and mental well-being before asking uneasy questions. Sometimes you would evade those questions, and some others you would give vague answers that would tell the others you were no fool.

You stretched out grasping thin air in your fist, tilting your head you started making a small sequence of Tai Chi you had learnt from Yelena. After more than a week of being in the hospital, you were finally able to feel your body as yours again. Your muscles flexed, and the shadows under your feet stirred with the silent command of your thoughts. You smiled glancing at your reflection through the window, everything was working just fine and you knew you were ready to go back home.

The door behind you cracked, and the knob turned to the left revealing the single figure of Doctor Jean Grey. The woman was beautiful, and her smile was infectious always putting your mind at ease.

“Hello, Y/N, how are you this morning?”

“Doc, I’m doing better now, thank you.” You spined around slowly, the shadows wavering around until they covered your feet, your smile grew cocking your head to follow the lead of your left arm then your right one.

“I certainly felt much better now.”

“I can see that.” The woman smile stepping closer to your bed while placing a single file on the breakfast table.

“Tell me you cam here with good news.”

Jean offered a single smile while taking a seat, she sat waiting for you to settle down on the bed. The room soon filled with silence that was only broken by the busy morning routine right outside your room. You had learnt your room was in one of the busiest wings in the hospital back in the Tower. Wanda had not been that lucky, though.

“Well, I do come with news, if they are good or not depend entirely on you.” Jean could see the change in you, even through the easy smile you wore the young doctor could see you were being overly cautious.

“Okay, I’m listening.”

Doctor Jean Gray sauntered inside the room with a light blush on her cheeks. Her eyes twinkling merrily glancing at the chart in her hands before settling then on you.

For some reason, the reaction of the woman made you squirm uncomfortably. You had been in this universe for two days now, but it wasn't until now that you were forced to go inside the examination room and get yourself a quick check-up. It was quite evident that in this world mutants and superpowered individuals were treated differently, and the rules governing each one of them were set to get control on the population. 

“You seemed rather chirp today, Doc, good news for you or me?”

Jean chuckled, placing the chart on the bed before putting a chair close to the bed.

“It's my anniversary, and I received quite the news today.” She stated tilting her head, you smiled back at her.

“Congratulations, then.” 

Jean nodded, putting a strand of hair out of her face, “thank you.”

“So that would be for you, what about me?” You finally asked leaning forward, your eyes drifting to the chart in your bed.

“Everything seems to be okay.”

“But…?” You arched a brow when Jean leaned back on the chair offering a serious facade.

“You had been quite silent in the last couple of days, keeping yourself out of everyone's way and most importantly,” here Jean stopped as if measuring her words, “your avoidance of your particular predicament has raised some concerns on our end.”

Silence followed such a declaration, you dared to lock eyes with the woman sitting in front of you well-aware of her ability to read beyond your initial thoughts. Jean didn't move nor did she give any indication of breaking into small talk, I stead she seemed to sit there and wait patiently for you to speak.

“I’m not sure I want to have this conversation.” You sighed, lifting a hand to the back of your head, scratching the nape of your neck. “But I guess it is inevitable.”

“It is.” Jean softened her features, grabbing the file she left on your bed, she opened it in a single page while presenting the form to you.

“How…how is she?” Your voice was above a whisper, but it was loud enough for Jean to hear it.

The woman leaned back letting you read the file while she started talking. 

“She is doing better now, trying to recover her magical core had been quite the challenge but our own team of witches and healers had come together to help around.” 

There was nothing much you could do but nod, your eyes drifted to the file with your thoughts trying to focus on a single issue at a time. Ever since the five of you got to that universe everything had been but a blur; your Wanda was taken straight to the hospital and she had been looked after Tony's team back in the Avengers Tower. 

“That's good.”

“I just want to do one last check-up before clearing you up, America has been waiting for you and the twins are very excited as well.” Jean chuckled, standing up making her way to the closest drawer and putting some surgical gloves out. “They seemed to think that having a pair of moms at their disposal would give them some kind of advantage in their mischief.”

You tried to hide your expression from the other woman, but it was inevitable. Jean offered a sympathetic smile while getting to work. 

“They are just children…” you mumbled feeling your body warm up, your muscles twitching just as Jean started testing your reflex. “I don't think they understand that much.”

“Mm, you would be surprised how much Billy and Tommy understand about the situation.” Jean leaned back, lifting her left hand and letting it hover right on top of your forehead. “They are pretty smart, and sensitive.”

You pressed your lips together not wanting to go into a discussion. Not that you could raise any arguments against that statement, you had noticed just how sensitive they were and how smart they were. They had come that first time into your room calling you mom without a care in the world, telling you about their day while also making you aware of how they had sneaked in to see you and Wanda.

Your counterpart had been amused by your reaction, while her Wanda had been just a tad bit concerned about the confusion the whole situation could create in the children. 

“If I were to be honest, you look more confused than them.”

“You told me you don't read minds unless you have permission.” You replied furrowing your brows, Jean had the sense of looking embarrassed but never lost her smile when looking back at you.

“You kind of scream that thought at me, sometimes it is inevitable.”

Jean then leaned back, grabbing your file and writing some notes down. 

“I think you're ready to go.” Jean cocked her head when the first thing you did was jump down the bed and go to the closest chair holding your clothes. “But Wanda…”

You winced, grabbing your clothes tightly before turning around, this time around Jean was looking serious, her eyes gleaming lightly.

“What about Wanda?”

The silence grew around the both of you, your body was already tensing the muscles you would need to run. Jean opened her mouth only to close it again as if she didn't know what to say or how to say it. 

“I think you should visit her, it can make a difference in her recovery.”

At the end of the day, this last visit from Jean Grey was just that, another attempt from these people to go to Wanda and make sure she was okay. For you to stop running and face her taking ownership of what would happen next.

It was complicated.

And you were unsure as to how to proceed or what was expected of you.

“Look, I just…”

“MOM!!!!”

Not sooner had you heard such a scream, you found yourself being tackled by a pair of bouncing kids. Your heart skipped a beat with your arms lifted at your shoulders height while the kids had their faces up to look at you with toothy grins. They were quite adorable, and in reality a part of you seemed to just instantly loved them, noticing the likeness they had to Wanda and yourself.

“Okay, guys let’s back up a little, remember what we talked to you about?” 

The room was suddenly very crowded, your counterpart came right in followed by America and Pietro. It became quite apparent that everyone was waiting for Jean to finish her last check-up on you before getting into the room and see how you were doing. You placed your hands on the twin’s heads ruffling their hair playfully while offering a tentative smile. 

“That’s okay, I’m getting used to the enthusiastic greeting.”

“And them calling you mom?” Pietro inquired, quaking his brow while placing his hands in his pockets.

You couldn’t help the little wince, recoiling from the comment with your body turning to the chair and grabbing your clothes once more. Billy and Tommy glanced at one another, with Billy opening his eyes really big while making a gesture with his head. 

“Anyway, I’m just glad to know your good to go, because I was thinking we can go right ahead and get a look around and perhaps…” America started babbling making her way to your bed.

You nodded absentmindedly, your attention drifting for a moment to your counterpart and Jean that had decided to step out of the room to have a small conversation. You couldn’t help but wonder what exactly was going on, and what they were discussing with your thoughts going over and over to the woman that was still unconscious somewhere inside the building. 

Everything was strange in this universe. 

A part of you knew that sooner or later the conversation of Wanda and you going back to your respective reality would come; but it was quite evident everyone was waiting for the right moment to intervene and perhaps get something done. 

“Well, I think you better change so we can get out of here,” Pietro broke your line of thoughts, his eyes gleaming mischievously with his lips curling into a familiar expression. “Billy and Tommy prepare something for you, and I bet you are dying to eat something that isn’t hospital food.”

“You are completely right on that one, I’m going to change and then…you guys can show me a good time.”

You offered a tentative smile, your heart dropping for a moment when the twins cheered babbling non-stop to America and Pietro. For a brief moment you wondered…

…was this what you were missing back home?

_______________

You had been welcomed inside the household of your counterpart. 

This time around, the guest room had been prepared and you could enjoy the joys of a soft bed and a nice view of the backyard while trying to get some sleep. The day had been quite unexpected, with the twins and America being active participants in different forms of conversations and different sets of games and rambles that you were not prepared to share with these people.

You had tried to get away from it, but Billy and Tommy were very adamant on having you close and including you in every single moment of their afternoon. You didn’t fight too hard to not be there, though. After a while you realised Wanda would not be joining the family outing and actually your counterpart ended up being just a good source of geek material that differed from the one you had in your own world. 

Not for a single moment did anyone mention the white elephant in the room.

And for that you were quite grateful.

But now, in the middle of the night with the stars twinkling above your head and everyone sleeping in the house you couldn't help but think about it. Time was running out, sooner or later you would need to go back and face the consequences of what happened back in Norway and in that other universe. 

Sooner or later you would need to face Wanda once more.

“It is pretty late for you to be thinking so loud.” 

You kept your attention on the stars, the room was completely dark which was one of the reasons as to why you knew she had come home already. The young woman took a few steps forward until she was standing beside you, her face turned to the sky with her arms hugging her tightly.

“I just couldn’t go back to sleep.” You shrugged leaning against the wall, your head tilted to the side. “It was quite an exciting day, I think I’m still in a sugar rush.”

Wanda chuckled, lowering her head, her eyes gleaming lightly, turning her attention to you.

“So I heard. The twins really took you everywhere and made sure you taste everything back in the restaurant, didn’t they?”

Your face fell when the memories of that day came back, the twins had never left your side while telling you stories about their adventures. Not for a single moment did they think or even entertained the idea of them not being part of your life in your other world. For them it had been natural to make sure that you and Wanda did not forget about them. That was one of the reasons why it had been a shock for them to find out you and they didn’t know about that restaurant.

“You should tell our other selves about this place, mom! I know they will love it!”

“Yeah, we love it, and you love bringing us here!”

It still burnt that this life was not yours, but there was nothing you could do. 

Wanda could read your thoughts; she could sense your pain and it was something she couldn’t take. Not with you. Wanda dropped her arms, stepping closer to you. Her hand felt warm on your face, brushing away your hair and mapping out the form of your jaw. It was so unexpected you couldn’t help but freeze in place the tension evident in the contraction of your muscles, your left foot stepping back and stopping waiting for the other foot to join. It didn’t happen, though, you stood there waiting for something else to happen. 

“They are good kids.” Your voice trembled at the very end of that sentence, but your eyes never waver in their hold of those green irises.

“They are. They are very much your children as much as they are mine.” Wanda offered a timid smile that soon vanished, whatever hold she had on you broke and the young woman turned around as if ready to leave. 

The tension in your body didn’t leave, and your mind was poking at you uncomfortably pressing over for you to speak. To say something, to ask the question you were dying to ask but didn’t dare to do so. It looked as if nothing else was going to be said that day, as if nothing else was going to happen and you were trying to get a hold of your beating heart when Wanda stopped by the door turning to the side and locking her eyes with yours.

“You will need to face her sooner or later, Y/N.” Wanda let her words sink in, her eyes softening lightly when she could sense the conflict inside of you. 

“Do I have to?” The question left your lips before you could stop it, Wanda lifted her shoulder stepping back. 

“I think you know the answer to that question,” she stated letting out a tired yawn, “what you really need to ask yourself, though is what would happen if that confrontation doesn’t come the way you expect it to be? What if it becomes everything you thought impossible with her? Are you ready to face that conversation? Are you ready to make a decision for you and her?”

You hated the fact this Wanda was so insightful and you hated even more that she was right. That was the real reason as to why you couldn’t sleep, as to why you were trying to bury your emotions and your memories, while also running away from what you were experimenting with. Of the changes that had come knocking on your door all those months ago.

“Have a good night, Y/N, rest and follow your instincts on this one because they…” Wanda left the sentence in the air, and it was you the one to finish it.

“They had never failed me.”

There was a flash of a smile and then Wanda left, closing the door behind her. 

___________________

But trying to follow your instincts was easier said than done.

A part of you knew the meeting was inevitable, after all, the both of you needed to go back to your respective Universe and this would never happen if you two kept on avoiding one another. But then, there was another part, the one you had been carrying with you for far too long, that was afraid of a confrontation that might broke your heart all over again.  

You played with time for as long as you could, taking advantage of Tony’s curiosity and Loki’s infinite questions. You became very helpful of Wong and Hank’s questions, and you couldn’t help but give in the twin’s whims every night before going to bed. Nevertheless, you had the days count on that universe, and it wasn’t as if you really wished to stay. You missed home, and you missed your friends and family; but the final step to get everything ready to go back was something you had never felt ready to do.

On the fifth morning you woke up on a guest room, you knew you couldn't run anymore. America had finished her breakfast and Y/N was reading the paper, no one did or said anything for a moment until you sat at the table with the coffee warming up the mug in your hands.

“Wanda is fully recovered.” Your counterpart stated, never leaving her eyes from the page she was reading, “she is confused, a little weak but ready to talk and go back home.”

“Talk?” You asked a little harsher than you were meant to.

Y/N lifted a single brow, her lips pursing tightly.

“With you.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but a kick on your leg made you stop. America was glaring at you, her head shaking slightly opening her eyes and glancing meaningfully at your counterpart.

“I know, I just…”

Y/N sighed, closing the paper and placing it slowly on the counter. Her eyes pierced you with a gaze filled with emotion, you shifted on the chair trying to look away but unable to do so.

“Whether you want it or not, you will need to have this confrontation. Whatever you are afraid of facing…I think you should get your shit together and face it right away. You are running out of time, and excuses.”

Your counterpart finished her tirade with a slap to the table, shaking her head as she stood up and left the kitchen. You cocked your head until you found America glancing at you.

“I guess there is no running from this, is it?”

America shrugged, biting her lower lip, “I guess not.”

You lowered your eyes to the counter before lifting them to ensure America was paying attention to you.

“Once this is over, are you staying or are you coming back with us?” The question caught her off of guard, America was looking shocked and her mouth tried to form a specific thought but was unable to respond right away.

You chuckled standing up, your hand on her shoulder.

“You would be more than welcome back home, but I know you missed this place greatly.” You squeezed her shoulder before walking away, a single wall of dark shadows spreading before you. “Think about it, America, I'll be back in a few hours and we will talk about me and Wanda going back home.”

“I will think about it.” America mumbled offering a half smile. “Good luck.”

You winked at her trying to show more confidence than you actually felt before crossing over the shadows and disappearing into them. The trip was short, with the shadows embracing you with a cold hold leading through the space until you stepped inside a dimly lit hall.

The place was completely silent, though you could make out the sound of chatter in the distance. You lowered your gaze to the floor, our ears twitching lightly ignoring the rest of the sounds and focusing on your heartbeat.

The last couple of months have been a complete rollercoaster for you. You never imagined, even in your wildest dreams, that Wanda would show at your doorstep with a young woman asking for help. For a very long time, you had put in the back of your mind the confrontation with Wanda. A part of you knew it would come, eventually. But you never intended to be the one to take the first step for the meeting to happen.

When you got to see Wanda face to face, and actually talk to her, your world came crumbling down around you. The barriers you had built around your heart and mind ended up not being as strong and resilient as thought them to be. Your heart still missed a beat at the sound of her laughter, and your hardened façade went away as soon as you saw the suffering and the heartbreak in those green eyes.

Wanda would always be one of your greatest weaknesses. 

And you hated yourself for that.

It was as if your own suffering didn't matter, as long as Wanda was fine and didn't have to feel what you felt. Yet you refused to believe her words or even offer forgiveness for the wrong doings in the past. All of this came crashing down in a single meeting, all the doubts and pain came back, but also the yearning and the confusion you were threatening to overwhelm you and leave you without a way out. 

You took a deep breath, your hand running through your hair helping your uneasiness. You closed for a brief moment, and your mind went blank emptying any thoughts that might come in and make you falter in your actions. The last couple of days, and actually the last couple of months, you had thought about this moment; you had given yourself and her a chance to step aside and let the past in the past and for the both of you ready to face the present without thinking too much about the future.

The room was in complete darkness, the lights were out and the curtains were still closed. You could hear the monitor in the corner, the bed occupied the left side of the room leaving a big sofa and a couple of chairs on the right. Hanging from the wall you could see the TV that was huge enough to almost cover the wall, the only thing that prevented this from happening was the side door leading to the bathroom. Tony was really into luxury, you closed the door behind you a little unsure on how to proceed.

The tension around the room only increased when you felt a pair of eyes on you. It didn't take too long for you to know who it was, you stepped forward making your way to the curtains. 

“Would you mind if I open them up? I prefer the natural light of the day instead of the artificial ones.” You turned lightly, finally locking your eyes with those of Wanda.

Your Wanda.

“That's fine.” She replied, her voice was but a whisper but you could get the strong laced tone that Scarlet used whenever she talked to you.

The room changed under the light of the day, while there was not much sun the sky was cloudless and the position of the tower as well as the floor you two were currently in allowed for the perfect setting for natural light. You glanced around a city that was familiar yet strange, the weight of that stare didn't leave you, not even when you finally turned around to lock eyes with her.

“You look fine.” Wanda lowered her chin, her fingers twitching on top of the bed wanting to do or say something else but unsure where her relationship with you stood at the moment.

“I wasn't that badly injured, but I think I did need the rest.” You took a step forward, then another until you were actually standing beside Wanda.

Wanda hesitated for a moment before moving to the left, she chewed on her lower lip before patting the spot on the bed.

“You can sit here, if … if you want, there is also a chair and…” whatever else Wanda was going to say was cut off by you taking her initial offer of sitting on the bed.

Wanda felt her heart do somersaults, her body tingling at your closeness and the little voice she had come to recognize as Scarlet’s whispering to her telling her to close the distance, to grab your hand, to not let you go. But she held back knowing that her position was precarious at best and whatever you had come to discuss with her needed to be addressed first. 

“How are you?” You fixed your position on the bed, well aware that the only thing you needed was to lower your arm and your hand would be touching Wanda's one. 

“I'm better now, a little sore and getting use to…” here Wanda trailed off with her brows creasing a little, “to be complete, I guess. It's difficult, but I think I am ready.”

Her words held a decisive tone, but her eyes were flashing the doubts running inside her mind. You realised right there and then that nothing much had changed in the last couple of years, there were things you could still read about her. 

“Ready for what?” You asked quietly, Wanda sighed shrugging.

“Going back.” She replied simply. “Getting out of your way, out of your life…I did promise you after all of this was over I wouldn't bother you any more…”

Her words stung your heart, spreading an electrifying pain all through your body until it hit your brain. You didn't understand why, exactly. That had been the deal, to help her out and then get her out of your life. Then, if you knew what was going to happen, how it would end, why were you having these doubts? Why did it hurt?

Wanda was in her own thoughts, a part of her she had tried to suppress, the one she tried to deny stirred in anger. Wanda wanted to speak out, to tell you she didn't want to go and that she certainly didn't want to pretend nothing had happened in the last couple of months. That seeing you had been one of her greatest joys in life, but it had also brought pain and sadness, that being in this universe seeing the twins and facing what could have been…

Without really noticing, tears started falling rolling down her cheeks while her heart shrank with the weight of her emotions. Wanda refused to give in, her fists closing tightly and her tears breaking her composure and without really wanting to she finally broke in front of you.

You observed the full process, the way her face changed and the tears pilling up her eyes. Wanda was trying to bottle up whatever she was feeling, whatever she was thinking. It was so easy to ignore everything the other woman was experiencing; it was easy to hold onto your shared past. 

But this was Wanda.

And you couldn't ignore her. That was the reason why you had to disappear after the breakup.

With a tentative touch, you let your hand fall on top of hers. Your thumb drew circles before leaning in and wrapping her in a hug. Wanda held onto you, her sobs filling the room while her hands tried to grasp your clothes. You didn't say anything, but for some reason you could feel it.

The apology you never allowed her to share with you. The broken heart she had been wearing ever since that day. 

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry…”

Wanda cried and once she started she couldn't stop. Fixing your position on the bed you made sure she was comfortably resting her weight on your left side, putting comforting arms around her while soothing her body with sweet caresses you had dared to make in anyone but her.

Whatever conversation you were meant to have with her, whatever it was you had come to talk to her about soon crumbled under the pressure of her tears and your own feelings for her. 

And just like that, you knew you couldn't let her go.

Not without a real conversation.

And not without a fight.

______________________

Wanda was not completely sure when she fell asleep, but right now she was completely aware of being awake resting on top of you with the warmth and comfort of your presence soothing her soul.

Her body tensed right away, though soon she relaxed into the embrace having noticed your even breathing and the relaxed posture of your body. You had fallen asleep as well and, at some point the both of you had ended up sharing the small hospital bed without anyone coming over to interrupt that moment.

Wanda nuzzled her face against your neck, she wished this was something she would share with you every day. How she had missed waking up in your arms, to see your smile in the mornings and your hyperactive body demand for the morning routine. Everything was so messed up, and she didn't know when she allowed her world to crumble into nothingness.

Her heart trembled with emotion, and her thoughts formed an idea Wanda knew was not completely hers but a figment of Scarlet. 

You have to fight back! You need to get her back! You need to tell her everything we discovered! Everything we know!

Her voice was demanding, yet it held a hint of desperation that Wanda was familiar with. It was the same voice she had woken up to back in the battlefield after the snap, the same one she had heard countless of times whenever she thought about you or a way to recover her life. Everything had been so complicated, yet it could had been so easy to recover her life to actually try to make a change and reconcile with everyone.

There were no more tears in her eyes, and the sadness and sorrow she had lived with all her life was a burden she was tired to carry with her. With some reluctance, Wanda let go of you stirring in the bed while trying to be careful in her movements, she missed your closeness and the warm that your body had provided but it was time for her to stand up.

You need to fight for her, you cannot lose her. Not again.

The voice echoed inside her head, and Wanda knew this time around she couldn’t allow her fears to stop her from at least getting a chance to be your friend. With that thought in mind, Wanda stood on weakened feet gathering her strength before walking towards the closes wardrobe and grabbing some clothes. She gave you one last glance before making her way to the bathroom, she would need to get ready for what would come next.

It was the cold what wake you up.

The cold and the fact you missed the weight of someone resting on your left side, you sighed blinking owlishly while patting the side of the bed where you were pretty sure your companion had been resting. In those glorious moments between being awake and asleep, you were trying to grasp the reality of the woman you had been holding. Your memory groggily moving through the smell of her shampoo, and the softness of her skin and then…

You remembered.

Wanda had been crying, you had held her, you had fallen asleep…

You stood up so fast that you fell of the bed hitting your head against the night table, while hitting your ass on the ground.

“Ugh, fuck…”

“Are you…are you alright? What…did you fall off the bed?”

You wished you could hide, but instead of that you lifted your face to see Wanda standing by the bed trying to hold back her laughter just as her eyes gleamed with worry. You could sense the blush forming on your cheeks, while your whole body seemed to protest under the pain of the hits you got when falling.

“I…yes, I just…woke up too fast and…I fell off the bed.”

That was all that Wanda needed to start laughing, she couldn’t help herself. She had seen you woke up and then lose all control while getting your feet entangled on the sheets and falling on your ass. It had been funny, and the fact that you now looked all embarrassed and were pouting made for the scene not only something funny but quite adorable.

You huffed trying to stand up, rolling your eyes while the other woman held against the bed trying to control her laughter.

“Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, little witch…” the nickname slipped your lips without giving it a second thought. That made the laughter died and once more the room was filled with a tension neither one of you were ready to maintain.

“I’m sorry it’s just…your face, and the way you fell, so full of grace…”

“I bet.” You rolled your eyes trying to check your head and body before settling your eyes on Wanda.

The young woman had put on some jeans and a white blouse, while her hair was still wet after the bath. You furrowed your brows looking away while catching the time on the clock on the wall. It was almost midday, which would explain why you were so hungry all of a sudden.

“I guess you really are feeling better.”

Wanda bounced lightly checking her hands and body, she wouldn’t say she felt better but she certainly was tired of being in bed while letting everyone come in and out to check her over. This world had a peculiar way to treat people with powers and having so many people with magical abilities come in and check her magical core had been extenuating and rather uncomfortable. The only time she had felt at ease had been with her counterpart, and that had been a whole different situation.

“I just need to get out of here.” Wanda finally revealed offering a half smile, “I heard from one of the nurses they have a nice restaurant right across the street, it has sandwiches and pizza…perhaps…”

You blinked a couple of times at the suggestion, your hand went right away to your pocket and your wallet. You hope the money you carried with you had some sort of value on this place, with a shrugged you nodded your agreement.

“Sounds like a plan. Lead the way, then.”

Wanda couldn’t hide her smile at the acceptance, she turned around and grabbing a jacket dragged you out of the room making her way directly to the elevator at the end of the hall. None of them noticed the camera watching their every move or the shadowy figure hidden in a close-by room. Your counterpart smirked shaking her head, she owed her wife a nice dinner. Wanda had always been right. Always.

In the security room, Wanda Maximoff allowed a tiny smile on her face, she lifted her stare to Tony and Loki, both of them shook their heads still slightly confused about the interaction.

“Now, what?” Tony finally asked staring at Wanda then at Loki.

“Now, we wait.” Loki replied waving away his hand. “For now, I think they are right, I’m starving and you ought to feed us, Stark.”

“Why is it always my responsibility?”

“You’re the one with money.” Loki replied ignoring the indignant huff coming from the older man, and the amused chuckled from Wanda.

_________________________

The restaurant was almost empty.

There were a few empty tables in the back, the one you chose was perfect for a nice conversation by hiding you two away from imprudent ears. The place was cosy, with decorations of blue and green creating a magical atmosphere with the dim lights around the establishment and the sweet aroma of spices that made you remembered home. You sat down facing Wanda who was looking troubled at the moment.

The waitress dedicated you a timid smile while putting a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Welcome to the Sandwich Emporium, what can I get you today?” Her question was directed at you, and her eyes never even bothered to look away as you grabbed the menu she was offering.

“I’m not sure, what do you recommend?” You glanced at the menu then back at Wanda, the redhead was glaring at the menu pursing her lips lightly while you merely frowned.

“Well, that depends on what are you looking for,” her tone of voice didn’t leave anything to the imagination, and you couldn’t help but raise a single eyebrow at that. The young woman opened her eyes wide blushing profusely. “I mean…I…”

“She is having La Tricolore and I’m having La Tartuffo.” Wanda point two pictures on the menu, before handing it over to the waitress, her eyes gleaming strangely while you just blinked slightly confused. “And I’m having some water, and she is having a cappuccino.”

“Very well, I’ll be right back.” The young woman left rather quickly, her ears burning red after having come across the redhead.

You had your eyebrows raised glancing over at Wanda who was trying rally hard to ignore you. After a moment she finally let out a heavy sigh, her head turned away from you.

“La Tricolore has beef, cheese, some hazelnuts, and that pistachio cream you…” here Wanda trailed off opening her eyes when she realized what she had done. “I’m sorry, I…”

“I like it, sounds delicious.” You placed your hands on the table not really bothered by what had happened but rather confused. “I’m surprised you remember.”

“I never forget.” Wanda brushed her hair away lifting her face to finally lock her eyes with yours. “I always…remember, Y/N.”

“I remembered too, Wanda. I remembered everything.” You stated but whatever anger you had held it had given way to bitterness and sadness.

Wanda winced tapping on the table before wiggling her hands together.

“I…I never got to…” She tilted her head, and you could see the tears hidden behind those green eyes. “I’m sorry.”

It didn’t even cover what had happened, all the pain she had caused on that day. But those words made your soul tremble, you scoffed shaking your head leaning back on the seat.

“It is too late, don’t you think?” You could see your words hurt her, and everything you had lived up to that point came rushing in piling up inside your mind until you just put everything away and left what was important.

Wanda nodded defeated, “I know, I just…I never got to say it to you.”

But it wasn’t about asking for forgiveness, and you knew that. And Wanda was also well aware of the fact. The question was not about forgiveness, the question was if you could move forward after everything that had happened.

“I never got to say it, I messed up. I was so afraid, I just…I didn’t know what to do, how to react, how to…deal with everything.”

Wanda spoke with a clear desperation tinge in her words, you could see the crumbling behind her eyes, how her soul would tremble while trying to tell you everything that you didn’t want to hear ten years ago.

“Vision was convenient.” Wanda said, this time around she grabbed the seat tightly her body completely tensed making her neck hurt as she forced herself to keep her head up and look at you. “I was so afraid, so lost and…and It’s not an excuse! I deserve your hatred! I deserved your anger! I just…”

“You could have told me, you know?” You finally said when it was obvious Wanda couldn’t continue talking. “I was there for you, and I could have helped. I thought you trusted me but instead of telling me whatever was happening you…”

This was not the conversation the both of you were supposed to have, or at least it wasn’t supposed to be this way. You weren’t supposed to understand, but to stand your ground and tell Wanda how much of a bitch she had been. But the last couple of days had taught you something about yourself, about Wanda and what could have been. And if Wanda was confused you weren’t fairing any better.

“I know you don’t get it, and that’s okay because you grew with Natasha and then you have Fury and Maria and Yelena…” Wanda waved her hand weakly, her tears rolling down while her eyes revealed the deep sadness she had always carried with herself.

“I lost everything, and I didn’t know how to deal…and you were strong, and brave, you were not afraid of anything and I was only me.” Wanda broke into a sob, with a crooked smile that showed you just how broken she was. How lost she was still feeling.

“I…after it happened I never…” Wanda started but couldn’t finish, you perked up at her words because this was something you hadn’t bothered to find out.

“What happened after I left? Were you happy? Did he make you happy?” You didn’t mean to sound so bitter, but your words carry with them poison that you had been holding for far too long.

“I didn’t stay with him, Y/N. I tried to look for you, to reach out for you but…but I couldn’t and I didn’t stay with Vision, I didn’t feel anything I just… I messed up! Okay? That’s what I did, and I didn’t know how to make it better and I’ve been trying to be good to make it better all these years…”

You wouldn't know about that.

Just as she was trying to do some good, you were trying to forget. It was one of the reasons why you kept yourself out of everyone's business and dealt with the superhero work alone. When Tony and Steve got into that quarrel and you saw what happened back in Lagos you knew you had made the right decision. Then, everything became more complicated and you just busy yourself with other problems, always trying to keep the team away while trying to get glimpses of news about Wanda. You knew it had been hard for her, and you also knew she was never alone.

Vision.

That had always been the main issue, wasn't it?

“I was on the run with the others, but I just wanted to disappear. Vision…he was helping me with getting a new identity.” Wanda leaned back tilting her head to the wall to hide the tears rolling down her cheek.

It was an answer to an unasked question. The conversation died for a moment, the waitress eyed Wanda before offering a smile to you placing the different orders on the table.

“Do you need anything else?”

“No, thank you.”

“Well, if there is anything I can do, I'm Anne.” The waitress offered one last smile walking backwards and then leaving you two alone.

The food smelled delicious; you grabbed your sandwich allowing Wanda the moment of privacy. The silence grew heavier just as you distracted yourself glancing around the place while taking another bite from your lunch.  

“I was just trying to live my life, and then when Thanos happened…” Wanda huffed turning to her food, she was no longer hungry if anything she wanted to disappear. 

Everything seemed so pointless, the look in your eyes would never leave, and she would go back to a world in which she was despised by the only woman she had ever been in love with.

“This is really delicious; you should try it.” You interrupted her, offering a full smile while grabbing another bite.

Wanda blinked confused; she kept her eyes on you then back on her food. For a brief moment, she hesitated, she was no longer hungry and if she were to be honest she felt tired. You took a sip from your cappuccino, placing your hand on the table, dangerously close to hers.

“I know you are hungry, Wanda. And I also know…I didn't want to know, but I get it.” You passed your hand on your hair pressing your back on the seat. “I'm tired of this, I just…”

“I can't take it when you look at me like that.”

“Like what?” You crunched up your nose, Wanda lowered her eyes grabbing her food.

“As if I am nothing to you, as if you…you hate me and…”

She trailed off putting the food in her mouth and silencing her words. You frowned, pursing your lips while playing those words inside your head. 

“I don't hate you.” You softened your features, your eyes glistening under the weight of memories. “I could never hate you.”

Silence followed your statement, the shivering discomfort of what your words could mean infused the atmosphere with questions Wanda didn't dare to ask. You lowered your gaze and focused completely on the sandwich that was still on the plate, and for a good half hour that was all you and Wanda did. 

When there was nothing else coming in between the unfinished conversation, Wanda put her hands on the table her eyes down casted. This was actually the very first time the both of you came face to face without anyone or anything coming in between. It was a confrontation you never thought would happen about something you had always imagined. It always came with different scenarios, but the outcome had always been the same. With you finally finding peace and never looking back, and with Wanda filled with regret for what she had lost.

This conversation though was completely different. You lifted your face finding those green eyes staring back at you with longing and a deep sadness that had become characteristic of Wanda. 

“How did you end up in Westview?” The question rolled out of your lips with a hint of bitterness you could not hide.

Wanda winced playing the napkin on the table, you waited until the woman started talking again.

“I found the box you hid in your room back at the Avenger's compound.” She stated simply, her lips breaking into a grimace. “I never…after you left I never went back there until after the battle with Thanos and Steve’s funeral.”

Your eyes opened lightly in realisation; you remembered the box in which you had hidden the future you hoped to share with Wanda. The ring, the map, and the picture…everything made sense now; now you understood why Wanda had chosen that place and how everything had fit at one point or another. The only thing that was out of place had been Vision, your expression hardened and Wanda could tell you were thinking about Westview the life she had created there.

“I never thought of him, you know? I went there because I wanted to…” Wanda snorted lifting her face to the ceiling, her voice trembling under the weight of the memories. “I wanted to understand, and in a way, I wanted to find a way to go back to you. Not as…I mean, I wanted to at least be…be your friend.”

You shifted on the chair hearing as Wanda finally tell you her part of the story, how she had been completely alone after coming back from the Blip. Steve’s funeral showed her just how alone she was, and how lost she really felt; she didn’t have a work or a home or even family and friends. She spent her time driving around until she decided to ask for help and went to the only person she could think of: Tony.

In all this time you could see the story behind her eyes, you could read the suffering and the deep sadness in the gestures and the words that carried with them the flashbacks of those days in which you were ignorant of Wanda’s fate.

“I went there to punish myself.” Wanda broke into a bitter smile, “I guess I did a good job.”

“Wanda…” You started but the words tangled in your throat, the other woman waited expectantly but after a moment her face fell.

“You don’t have to…”

“You don’t have to punish yourself anymore.” You frowned lowering your gaze to the empty dishes on the table, you were fully aware of her eyes on you. “All this time, isolating yourself while unable to reach out to anyone…then, finding yourself in Westview with this Agatha…”

Wanda swallowed down her tears, she was trembling with a flame of hope flickering inside her heart. Wanda knew she had created the world around Westview, she knew that her isolation and her grief had broken out into an explosion of her magic to create a reality she could deal with. But she also knew her magic had been tampered with, and her illusion had been corrupted.

“I never stopped thinking about you.” She whispered with her hands grabbing the chair tightly, her eyes filled with unshed tears.

You nodded standing up while making your way to where she was sitting, you offered your hand though your face never changed. For a brief moment, Wanda hesitated, she glanced at your hand and then with a trembling hand accepted it.

“They do look like us, you know?” You stated flatly, your hand warm against hers.

Wanda furrowed her brows, her tears rolling down her cheeks but her eyes gleaming in confusion.

“Why?”

“Billy and Tommy.” You stated simply. “They do look like us.”

_______________________________________

That night you sat right outside the house.

Music and conversation could be heard in the backyard, with the lights of the kitchen projecting shadows on the grass. The sky above hour head was still showered with white dots that resulted familiar yet so different to what you were used to; the air was cold but nothing you couldn’t take in a night like that one.

You took a deep breath filling your lungs with cold air, inside your mind thoughts came crashing down into a myriad of possibilities and plans yet to be executed. The conversation with Wanda had gone unexpectedly well, yet you knew a lot of things needed to be done and said before things would be okay.

“Aren’t you a little cold out here?” America crunched up her nose trying to balance the two glasses she was carrying with her.

You turned to her, chuckling before stretching a little to help her out.

“Aren’t you supposed to be a part of this great celebration?”

America shrugged offering a tiny smile, “the twins are distracted with Wanda, both of them, and the rest is just chattering around.”

“So you decided to come to me?” You shook your head taking a sip from the beverage the young woman had brought with her. “You’re crazy.”

“Not as crazy as you are.” America wrapped her hands around the glass eyeing you out of the corner of her eyes. “How are you?”

“I guess I’m okay, how about you?” You pointed with your head to the house behind you, “this is what you missed, isn’t it? Now that you are back, well…”

America nodded turning her body to yours, “I feel happy, but I also feel lost. I know that I found them again, and I have so many possibilities right now, I just…”

 “Don’t know what to do?” You asked, America shrugged lowering her eyes.

“I’m finally starting to understand my powers and to get some control over them, if I keep working on them I would be able to travel without getting lost.” America let out a sigh dropping her shoulders, “those are a lot of possibilities and right now I think I need stability and keep learning.”

“Wise words, you have grown some, kiddo.” You bumped against her shoulder; the young woman blushed lightly offering a timid smile. “It may take time, but I’m pretty sure you will learn to control them.”

None of you mentioned the possibility of America finding her way back home, while it was an option it didn’t mean that America would find it once she had some control on her abilities. But for now, the young woman was happy to learn more about her powers and herself, her heart and soul finally finding a place she could call home.

“You don’t mind me coming back with you and Wanda?” America finally asked biting her lower lip while taking the last sip of her drink to her lips.

“No, I think it’s going to be fun.” You replied glancing at the young woman, “but I have to tell you right now, the training is going to be brutal.”

“I didn’t expect anything else.”

You chuckled nodding, “good.”

America straightened up tilting her head to glance at you then back at the house. You knew what the question was she wanted to ask, but you didn’t rush it.

“Are you and Wanda going to be okay?”

“I don’t know.” The honesty with which you answered that surprised even you, you turned to America with a serious face. “I’m not sure what would happen, America, but I guess I’m willing to find out.”

“That’s good, right?”

You shrugged, and the young woman went back to rest her head on your shoulder still highly confused by your answer. The sound of laughter, music and conversation filling out the sudden silence that embrace the both of you, your thoughts coming back to Wanda and the day you had spent with her.

Only time would tell what would happen next, and you were waiting anxiously what would happen next.

_______________________________

Billy and Tommy were talking non-stop, they were excited showing Wanda the latest project they had been working on back at school. The young woman could hardly hold her tears while letting her children talk to her about school and their lives as if she had always been there.

At first, it had hurt.

Wanda knew they were not hers, and yet she couldn’t help but love them and see them with the same eyes she had seen the twins back in her universe. A part of her never thought she would see Billy and Tommy again, the moment the illusion had fallen around her and she discovered what she had done to Westview she knew there wouldn’t be a way for her to recover her children.

Yet here they were.

 In another world, in another universe looking the same as she had imagined them once.

This time around everything was as it was supposed to be, with you by her side raising two children being a happy family.  A part of Wanda felt envy for everything her counterpart had and she couldn’t have.

“Are you sure you can’t have a family of your own?”

Wanda huffed turning to the source of the voice, her counterpart stood right beside her with softened eyes staring at the twins that were getting ready for bed. Wanda dropped her arms to her sides, her eyes glancing back into the room then back to the woman standing beside her.

“I’m pretty sure, she…” Wanda wrapped her arms around herself furrowing her brows, “she doesn’t love me anymore. I am nothing more than…and ally, and even that would be to stretch out our relationship.”

The other Wanda pursed her lips, she stepped closer never letting go of those green eyes she was so familiar with.

“You don’t believe that.” Wanda stated holding back a smile when the other woman stepped back scowling.

“I have to believe it, I can’t…” Wanda sighed lifting her chin to the ceiling holding back her weakness, she didn’t want the twins to see her cry. “I have to believe it or I will break my heart once more and I can’t lose control of my magic, I…last time it didn’t go well.”

The room filled with laughter, Billy ran to the bed jumping up and down with Tommy trying to follow up before falling down on his face. Wanda couldn’t help but gasp ready to help out but stopping when a gentle hand wrapped tenderly on her forearm. It was strange to see herself staring at her looking the same yet being so different than she was.

The twins were back in the game, falling on bed while discussing some subject Wanda couldn’t hear pretty well. The fall was soon forgotten and both of them were ready to go to sleep.

“Go on, you can put them to be and I will wait for you here.”

“Thank you.” Wanda whispered to her counterpart entering the room and going to Billy first.

The woman offered a shaky smile, her trembling hand brushing away his dark hair while her lips curved into a smile. Billy smiled back blinking slowly.

“Are you okay, mom?”

Wanda nodded leaning in placing a single kiss on his forehead, “more than okay, Billy. Have a good night, baby.”

“Good night, mommy.”

Then, Wanda went to Tommy who was looking at her differently, he wrapped his arms around her hugging her tightly and this time around she couldn’t help but cry.

“I love you, mom.”

“I love you too, Tommy, now go to sleep.” Once more she placed a kiss on Tommy’s forehead and with that she stepped back walking towards the door. “Sleep well, guys.”

“Night, mom!”

The door close behind her, and Wanda stood there allowing herself the goodbye she had longed to have with the twins. She tried to give the right closure to her emotions knowing full well she would go back a world in which she would be all alone. No twins, no Y/N, only her.

“Thank you.” Wanda whispered locking her eyes with those of her counterpart, the other woman nodded curtly.

“I knew it was important for you.” The woman hesitated for a moment before continuing, “but you shouldn’t lose any hope, Wanda. You and Y/N…”

“Don’t, please.” Wanda said softly. “Don’t give me hope, don’t tell me it is possible because…god, I’ve been breaking my heart over and over again and I just…I can’t take it anymore.”

“Then don’t let it go, don’t let it go without a fight.”

Wanda lifted her face to see her counterpart dead serious, the woman came closer wrapping her hands on her forearms making sure Wanda could not look away.

“You love her, and I am pretty sure she loves you as well, whatever happened in the past it shall stay there.” Wanda then softened letting go of her grip. “Don’t give up just yet, you may be surprised.”

Wanda wanted to talk, she wanted to believe but at the moment she was just tired and overwhelmed by everything that had happened, everything she had lived up to that point. She was overwhelmed by the fact that you were so close to her yet so far away, that she would go back to a world in which the twins were not there and she would be, once more, alone.

________________________________________

It was a sunny day.

America went over the contents of her backpack, her body was tingling all over while a void filled with butterflies settled in her lower abdomen. She closed her eyes taking a deep breath, her hands trembling while she secured the zipper on the backpack.

“You look nervous, you know you don’t have to go, right?” Y/N came into the room glancing around before settling her eyes on America, the young woman turned around offering a tiny smile.

“I know.” She replied shrugging, her hands played with the band on her wrist she tried to look everywhere but at Y/N but at the end of the day she couldn’t help it, she lifted her face and let the tears fall down.

“I’m sorry.” America whispered waiting for a recrimination on her part, for Y/N to finally tell her how bad she had messed up the first time she had fallen on their Universe.

But it never came, nor from her or Wanda, or anyone for that matter. America surrendered to the warm embrace of Y/N’s arms, she let the tears and sobs she had been holding to scape and finally liberated her mind of the guiltiness she had been feeling all this time.

“Hey, kiddo, it’s okay, it wasn’t your fault.” Y/N whispered soothingly her hand drawing circles with a half-smile showing on her face.

“I just…I shouldn’t have run the way I did, I should have fight or something.” America replied, leaning back, she was furrowing her brows while lifting her hands. “I could have stayed and helped around.”

“It wasn’t optional, though. You had to keep going to survive, that’s rule number one in this line of work, America.” Y/N put her hands on her pockets, her hair falling to the side with an easy smile adorning her lips. “You did what you have to at that point and no one should ever blame you for that. If it hadn’t been that way well, I wouldn’t be here telling the story.”

America doubted very much that it would have happened in such a way, but she would never really know it for certain. Ever since she started travelling through universes consciously she had learnt to deal with the different realities, trying to adapt to them and survive them. She never thought she would settle in a single universe, much less that she would get attach to the people in it.

The sound of conversation broke the sudden silence in the room, the twins laughing with Pietro and Wanda yelling for everyone to go to the backyard was the signal America had been waiting for. She stepped closer to give Y/N one last hug.

“Thank you for everything you did for me, Y/N. I couldn’t say this the last time due to the circumstances…”

“Us running for our lives?” Y/N chimed in chuckling, America snorted rolling her eyes.

“Yeah, that, I mean you guys received me in your home and gave me a chance to a family, I just..I will always carry that with me.”

Y/N softened while giving the teen another hug, “anytime kid, you are welcome in our household whenever you decided to come back.”

“I know, I just think I am needed it elsewhere.”

“I think so to.” Y/N stepped back glancing to the open door. “Watch over them, make sure that they are okay.”

“I will.” America smiled grabbing her backpack ready to go.

It was almost midday by the time America and Y/n came out of the house.

The backyard was full with Tony and Loki working around the logistics and the twins just running around between the two Wanda’s and everyone else. You stood by the garden, the conversation that Loki was having with Tony, Wong, Hank and America had lost all meaning as you entertained yourself with the last sight of the world that could have been. Your body was completely tensed, your eyes drifting around until they fell on the form of Wanda, your Wanda.

“Are you ready?” Y/N asked, you turned to her shaking your head.

“Were you?”

“No, I was never ready whenever she was around.” Y/N replied shrugging, “but once we had made our mind there was nothing that could stop us.”

You snorted nodding, “that’s right.”

“Are you going to fight?” Y/N stepped closer, her eyes going from you to Wanda then back again.

“I am going to make things right, I’m not sure if they will end up the same way it did here.” You replied placing your hands inside your pockets. “I guess only time will tell.”

Y/N nodded stretching her right hand to you, an easy smile forming on her lips.

“I hope everything goes well for you and Wanda, Y/N, just remember what’s really important.” Y/N said grabbing your hand with a friendly squeezed. “Please, be happy.”

“Protect them and be for them whenever they need you.” You replied squeezing back.

“I will.”

“Well, I guess we can try the portal once more, are you guys ready? Did you say your good-byes?” Tony clapped before rubbing his hands, everyone went to get in position until the cries of two boys reached them over.

Tommy and Billy came running with Wanda following them close behind, Billy went directly to Wanda wrapping his arms around her while Tommy went to you.

“I’m gonna miss you.” He mumbled looking up at you.

You chuckled ruffling his hair playfully, “I doubt it, pal. You have your mom’s here, but I am gonna miss you.”

“Say hi to your Tommy for me, please? Tell him he has the best mom in the whole universe!”

Those words pierced deeply inside your heart, but the innocence and the smile in Tommy’s face made you held back any reaction that wasn’t one of agreement.

“I will, Tommy, be good.”

At the other side of the yard Wanda and Billy were having a similar conversation, Wanda hugged him tightly before trying to let go. Billy called to her, looking around before wrapping his arms around Wanda’s neck, his lips close to her ear.

“Everything is gonna be okay, mommy, don’t worry, mom will come around.” Billy offered a toothy grin to Wanda who was too shocked to talk. “say hi to your billy for me, love you mom!”

Wanda watched as Billy joined his brother right beside their mother, Wanda locked eyes with her counterpart who offered a half smile and a vision Wanda Maximoff would not talk about until several years later. For now, she was just filled with doubts, and hopes, and uncertainties and soon Wanda was drowned by the voices surrounding her.

“Okay, this shouldn’t be that difficult, everyone remembers their roles?” Loki asked once more standing to the side while pointing at America who rolled her eyes.

“I do, I remember.”

“Good, because if you fail the three of you are going to be traveling around without a proper destination and probably die a horrible dead.”

“That’s so comforting, Loki.” You replied rolling your eyes. 2Stop scaring America and do your job.”

Loki rolled his eyes flickering his hands while putting the golden book out of thin air, he sat down crossing his legs while looking to an invisible spot in front of him.

“Very well, your timeline is not that hard to find, it is the only one with a latent anomaly.”

“How can you tell is ours and not a random one?”

Loki glared at you before going back to his work, “I can sense it, and this one lack something, it is missing something, I guess that would be both of you.”

Soon everyone was taking positions, Wanda stood beside you shifting from one foot to the other, her hands wiggling nervously while she tried to keep her eyes right ahead of herself. You could sense her uneasiness, her hands twitching biting her lower lip. America came forward, she was showing off a frown filled with confusion that Tony helped erased with a whispered explanation.

You eyed Wanda out of the corner of your eyes, the woman was completely tensed still bouncing trying to hold onto something but unable to find herself at ease. You doubted it for a moment before you grabbed her hand in yours.

Her hand was warm and soft, at first she was completely tensed and rigid but as soon as she sensed it was you her hand started to relax and give in the feeling.

“It’s gonna be okay.” You whispered; Wanda offered a smile nodding.

“I know.” Wanda knew that as long as you kept holding her hand everything would be okay, she didn’t dare to say anything else but in a bold move she spread her fingers and soon her hand was intertwined with yours.

You jerked around but Wanda was completely focused on America, after a moment of hesitation you straightened up frowning lightly though your hand clasped tenderly Wanda’s hand.

“Okay, it was nice meeting you all, now let’s begin.” Loki closed his eyes and soon the golden light of his magic started gleaming powerfully forming a tight circle that surrounded you and Wanda alongside America.

America could feel the power, she was sensing it through her muscles and her fingertips while her mind became a mask of pure blankness trying to form an idea. She remembered the lesson, to follow the magic around her while also joining her energy with that of Wanda and Y/N, her power running through her arm in electric jolts and then igniting her eyes until she was finally ready to make it explode.

Pulling her arm back, closing her fist America stretched her arm hitting the space in between her and the backyard creating an explosion in the form of a Star. The portal opened until it was as big as America, you peeked in watching the white plains of Norway, or at least that was what you thought.

With a last glance to your counterpart and Wanda, you squeezed the hand you were holding tenderly.

“Ready?” It was all you could say before the young woman nodded and with a single step she dragged you right through the portal.

The world you three had left behind was waiting for you.

And you were not sure what would happen next, the only thing you knew for certain was that you didn’t want to let go of the hand holding yours.

The portal closed behind the three of you leaving everyone behind with many questions and little to no answers.

Billy and Tommy hugged Wanda still glancing the place where the portal had been moments ago. The woman glanced at her children knowing there was something bothering greatly.

“Mommy, do you think they will love us?” Tommy asked lifting his face to Wanda, Wanda furrowed her brows tilting her head.

“What do you mean, baby?”

Billy scrunched up his nose, “You think they will love Billy and Tommy the way you love us?”

Wanda softened at the question; she knelt in front of her boys not really knowing how to explain that in their world they both didn’t even exist.

“Billy, I’m pretty sure that they would be very lucky to have children like the both of you, and they would absolutely love you very much.” This answer seemed to satisfy the boys, and just when Wanda thought the topic was over Tommy talked again.

“They are gonna love us very much, mommy.” Tommy smiled snugging closer to Wanda. “Just like they love one another very much, that’s how you and mommy made us, right?”

Wanda didn’t answer, but a part of her certainly hope that Tommy was not wrong. She had always hoped that her love for you would survive in every universe, Wanda lifted her face to see Y/N looking at her with tenderness and love, and Wanda knew right there and then that her counterpart would be okay.

You never stopped looking at her like that, you just learnt how to hide it pretty well.

You were still pretty much in love with your Wanda.

And now that you were gone with her, only time would tell if love was still possible.

Wanda sighed wishing you would let go of your resentment and doubts and give yourself and her counterpart a chance.

With a last glance to the space where you and the others had been standing, Wanda turned around hopeful that the past would stay in the past.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Next Chapter: You are finally back to your universe, everything seems surreal as you and the others are taken to interrogation rooms before resuming your normal lives. Carol doesn't want to leave your side, and Wanda knows she needs to step aside even though that's the last thing she wants to do.

[noxtivagus]

so much

[winterarmyy]

Baby, Fever & Cuddles

Glimpses of the grumpy chubby alpha!bucky's love life.

Summary: When Y/N unexpectedly cancelled their date plan, Bucky’s troubled mind seemed to jump right into the worst case scenario, but the reality was not quite what he thought.

Note: This is a part of 《 And You're Mine 》 AU.

Pairing: chubby alpha!bucky x omega!female!reader

Words: 3.5k++

Warnings: a/b/o dynamics. fluffy and soft feels with our chubby!alpha!bucky.

P/S: My writing is quite rusty after months of not utilizing it, so forgive me for that. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy this short fic and happy reading! 🤍

Read my other works here: Masterlist

Bucky has been staring, or more accurately, glaring at the reflection of himself for far too long now. Completely distracted with the image on the mirror, he did not notice how his well-made bed is now crowded with piles of his clothing items.

Hoodies, jeans, dress-shirts and even the dinner suit that he got last year; they were all mixed up in an untamed way. He might need a couple of hours to re-organize those but it does not matter right now.

What matters is what should he wear for his second date with y/n? So far everything he tried on was either too fancy or too tacky. “For fuck’s sake, it’s just a coffee date. Just pick one and go, Jesus.” Bucky’s inner Alpha has been nagging him to get this over with, because he’s going to be late to the date, especially if he plans to pick-up a bouquet for her.

Now standing in his red Henley, which he deemed was appropriate, he could not look past the soft bulge on his stomach. The bright colour of the fabric did nothing to hide the unflattering shape of his belly. He twisted his body to the side and unintentionally grimaced at the sight.

Bucky instinctively sucked in a deep breath, trying to hide the extra fat of his body; giving a glance of the shadow of his past self when he was but a man with a well-built body.

Bucky sighed out the breath that held, and his belly naturally morphed into the original shape. He really can’t hide his imperfections; not his belly nor his prosthetic arm. As he stares at the source of his insecurities, he remembered the night of his first date with her;

"Because Bucky, you are as lovable as a person can be." She placed his palm on either side of her cheeks, purring as the sensation on skin felt so right, "And I am absolutely honoured and proud to be standing here with an alpha like you." She smiled like she was the happiest omega on earth.

His cheeks heats into shades of red and pink as the memories remind him of her; the softness of her skin against his palms, that cute little purr she made and her sweet scent that he was already addicted to.

Before the blood managed to rush further down to his spine, he shook off the unholy thoughts produced by inner alpha. Bucky glanced at the mess on his bed from the reflection of the mirror and let out a sigh before glaring at himself, “What are you so afraid of?”.

Now that he was standing in front of her apartment, Bucky suddenly remembered why.

His heart pounds, his palms were sweating within his leather gloves, his fingers fiddled with the delicate material of the bouquet wrappings. The second date is different compared to the first; there’s more expectation, which means there might be more disappointment awaits.

Not that he would be displeased with y/n but he is afraid that she will be with him. A few sweet words that she spoke on their first date might work to calm him down at the moment, but it is not enough to make his years worth of insecurity disappear completely.

Bucky gulped nervously as he lifted his hand towards the door; he knew that he was quite early from the promised time, but he couldn’t help it. As much as he is afraid of what will come, he was as excited to see her again. She had been occupying his mind like no other; he misses her. A lot.

When he was about to knock on the door, his phone rang. Slipping it out of his pocket, his phone almost fell from his hands, when he read the name on the caller’s placeholder. Y/N. He took a deep breath and slid the icon across the screen, “Hello. Hi” Bucky’s tongue was already tied with just two words out.

“Hi, Bucky.” she greeted with softly. That alone was enough make his heart skipped a beat. “Hi, y/n.” Bucky could not control the dreamy undertone in his voice, if only she could see the soft haze in his gaze, “What’s up?”

“Really, Bucky? ‘What’s up’?” he mentally scolded himself for this choice of words. A brief silence followed his question. “Was that… hesitation?” a thought popped at the back of his head. “Ummm, listen, Bucky…” her voice dripped with uncertainty.

Bucky’s fist around the stem of the bouquet got a little tighter when she continued, “..I’m sorry. But, I think we should cancel our plans today. Umm, some, uh, something came up and I think I can’t make it...” Her cryptic reasons were just a buzzing sound in his ear now.

What was he expecting? That this time it’ll be different? He’s finally gonna have the happy ending he deserves? No. Of course, not.

“What was I thinking?” Bucky’s head slightly lean forward as he try to recollect himself, “I understand.” He replied. y/n quickly apologised for her sudden decision but Bucky was not really listening.

He was just trying to clear out the dark clouds in head by leaning his head to the apartment door. But when his hand was trying to support his weight against the wall, he accidentally pressed the doorbell.

“Shit!” he cursed under his breath. Panic arose when y/n asked if he could hold for a minute while she get the door. “No wait! y/n don--”, a few milliseconds later, the door was wide open, revealing the omega who's been occupying his mind for weeks.

“Bucky?” Her eyes widened; shocked at first but morphed into a pleasant smile. “You’re here?” she was awfully in glee to see the alpha, especially when she saw the pretty bouquet of carnations in his hand. But the joy only lasted for a short moment, until she realised, “Don’t tell me you were already here when I called you…” a soft gasp came from the smaller, her eyes glistening with guilt.

Bucky thought that there’s no way to go about this other than telling the truth, “Yeah. I’m sure you have a good reason to cancel our date. And since you’re here, umm, here.” hands trembling, he extended the bouquet towards her, his gruff exterior softened by the shy smile on his lips, “….for you.”

y/n’s cheeks flushed with delight as she accepted the flowers, “Awww, Bucky.” She held the soft petals towards her face, inhaling the spicy clove-y scent. Reminded by the time she first met him, the corners of her lips curled upwards into a tender smile before looking up at him with a sparkle of alluring mischief in her gaze.

In that split second, something was triggered at the back of Bucky’s mind. It seemed like he had seen this view before. In fact, it is almost identical. Including this very moment, when she tiptoed upwards, her tender gesture of cupping one side his chubby cheek and her soft lips pressed on the other, "Thank you for the flowers, alpha." She whispered against his skin.

When the omega looked up at him with that sweet smile on her lips, his inner alpha was ready to pounce on her and it was all from just that one innocent kiss, “You’re welcome, doll” His hand snaked around her waist, pulling her body close to his, “Glad you liked it.” He returned her kiss with his own, a gentle grab on the side of her head and a loving kiss on her cheek.

A pleasant shiver crawled all over his body, his cheeks heated up and his ears reddened. Bucky’s eyes soften into a hazy gaze that if she look closely, she might see hearts twinkling in his ocean blues.

He wanted more. More of her lips, more of her gentle touch. More of her.

Before the sounds of their soft laughter could spread, the loud shrieking sound of a crying baby coming from y/n’s apartment startled both of them to a freeze. y/n was quick on her feet, “Oh no, Daisy.” she gasped as she broke out from Bucky’s loose grip.

The omega purred in delight to his gesture, her hand instinctively went to grab on his shoulder; literally melting in his embrace when she lost her stance.

Good thing Bucky had his arms securely around her because if not she would’ve ended up on the floor. Bucky chuckled amusingly when he slowly led her body to lean back, almost dangling on his arm, as his kisses lingered on her jaw.

“Come on in, Bucky.” she shouted when she entered the living room area. Bucky didn’t reject her offer, and stepped into the foyer. Closing the door behind him, he saw how some of her shoes were organised at the entrance; he quietly took off his shoes and slipped into one of the fuzzy guest slippers that was laid on the side.

Stepping further inside, he realised that this was his first time in y/n’s home. He felt a wave of warmth enveloped him like a comforting embrace. His eyes wandered around the corridor, noticing the photographs on the wall; each frame a snapshot of cherished moments frozen in time. Smiling faces gazed back at him, capturing the essence of love and laughter that filled the air.

As Bucky entered the living room, he was met with the sight of y/n tenderly coaxing a crying baby into calmness; swaying the little bundle to the rhythm of her quiet lullaby. His heart skipped a beat at the gentle scene, though he knew instinctively that the baby wasn't her own. Any other normal person would’ve thought the opposite. But the lack of semblance in their scent gave it away.

y/n glanced up, a mixture of apology and relief in her eyes. "This is Daisy, my next-door neighbour's baby girl," she explained, her voice soft with concern. "Her mother caught a high fever all of the sudden, and Mr.Scott is out of town for work.”

Bucky’s steps stopped when he reached by y/n’s side, “The couple is not from here. They just moved from the UK a few months ago. They don’t have any family here.” Bucky silently listened to her explanation as his eyes peered at the baby in her arms; now calmed and curious of the tall stranger next to y/n.

“I volunteered to care for her while the mother went for a checkup at the nearby medical centre." y/n explained as she softly wiped the remaining tears on Daisy's cheeks, "I'm sorry," y/n continued, her tone tinged with guilt. "I know it's selfish of me to cancel our date because of this."

Her teeth sunk into her bottom lips. “I could’ve suggested a day care or something. But instead, I took the job.” She chuckled when Daisy babbled some incoherent words.

Bucky quickly intercepted her before she could come up with other lines of unnecessary explanation. He shook his head, a gentle smile gracing his lips. "No, don't be," he reassured her, his gaze softened as the baby chortled gleefully. "I can see why it's hard to resist."

The atmosphere shifted into something else; sweet and warm until the sound of the oven timer went off. "And that would be my lunch burning," y/n remarked, relief evident in her tone. Without missing a beat, she passed Daisy into Bucky’s arms, and he instinctively cradled her close.

It was his first time holding a baby. He knows that babies are small, I mean everybody knows that. But he never realises how light they are. No wonder people say they are fragile.

It's the softest thing he ever touched, he could not believe it. So, he does it again and again. Apparently it is amusing to Daisy that Bucky was playing with her cheeks, the little sweetheart squeal and chortle every time he poked his finger on her. There was no denying the fact that Bucky’s heart was tugged in several different directions whenever she shrieked in joy.

When Bucky’s hand reached to touch Daisy’s cheeks, he realised that maybe handling a baby with leather gloves and jacket was probably not the best idea. He skillfully took them off while cradling the baby close to his chest.

When he was done stripping to Henley, he brought his fleshed finger and poked Daisy’s round cheek.

Bucky momentarily lifted his gaze and observed the chaos unfolding in the kitchen with a sense of understanding, then turned his attention back to baby Daisy, who gazed up at him with wide, adoring eyes. "How about I stay and help you babysit little Daisy?" he suggested, a warm smile playing on his lips. "Seems like you could use a helping hand."

Y/n’s eyes widened in surprise, touched by his offer. "You would do that?" she asked, her voice tinged with disbelief. "I don't see any reason not to," Bucky replied with a shrug. "We're…" his words halted when he thought about it, "…mates. No, not yet." his mind spoke. Stumbling over the word as he corrected himself. "You, You're my girl, after all."

A blush spread across y/n's cheeks at his words, butterflies fluttering in her stomach. "Plus, I think little Daisy wants me to stay," Bucky continued, “Don’t you, flower?” his smile grew as the baby chortled and gurgled in agreement.

So, both of them took the role of being temporary parents while getting to know more about each other. If Steve was there to see this scene he’d tear up from how beautiful it was. The way they naturally tend to each other’s every need and how natural their chemistry clicked.

It was so effortless, as if they were two pieces of a puzzle finally finding their perfect fit. From the moment they stepped into the cosy haven of Daisy's world, there was an unspoken understanding between them, a shared connection that transcended mere words.

And the time flows like a gentle stream, Bucky and y/n found themselves swept up in the rhythm of their newfound relationship, even in the chaos of taking care of Daisy. Hours and hours passed, and when the sun set in the horizon, they nestled on the floor, a makeshift fortress of pillows and blankets cocooned them from the harsh reality of the outside world. Daisy, the tiny bundle of joy they were entrusted to care for, lay peacefully cradled in y/n’s arms.

As Bucky watched y/n’s gently sway with Daisy, he couldn't help but marvel at the tenderness in her touch. Her eyes sparkled with maternal warmth, a sight that stirred something deep within him. He had never seen such a sight before – so serene, so utterly captivating.

Daisy, in her innocence, reached out with tiny hands, her curious gaze fixating on Bucky’s metal fingers. With a playful gleam in her eyes, she chomped down on the cold material, eliciting a surprised yelp from Bucky. y/n chuckled softly, her laughter like music to his ears.

"Looks like Daisy's taken a liking to you," y/n remarked, her voice soft and affectionate.

Bucky grinned, gently wiggling his fingers out of Daisy’s mouth. His swift movement to wipe the string of saliva from Daisy’s mouth makes it look like Bucky was an experienced father, "Seems that way. Guess I'll have to watch out for that scary toothless mouth of hers."

The moment stretched on, each passing second filled with a quiet intimacy that seemed to enveloped them in a world of their own. Y/n leaned back against a mound of pillows, Daisy nestled contentedly against her chest. Bucky lay beside them, his gaze drifting between his omega and the sleepy child cooing on her chest.

Y/n's gaze lifted, her eyes meeting Bucky’s with a soft, shy smile playing on her lips. As she nestled further into the warmth of Daisy's soft head, a gentle blush crept across her cheeks, adding a rosy hue to her already radiant complexion.

"What’s on your mind, Bucky?" she asked, her voice soft and quiet as she settled Daisy into her crib for a nap before sliding back into his arms. Bucky wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close.

In that moment, Bucky found himself lost in thought. He couldn't shake the feeling of déjà vu that washed over him, a fleeting memory of a similar scene with another woman.

It can’t be. She was a beta and y/n is an omega. It would be impossible. But what if…

"I was just thinking..." Bucky began, his voice trailing off as he searched for the right words. "Yes?" y/n's voice was a soft melody, laced with curiosity as she looked up at him. Bucky hesitated, unsure how to articulate the thoughts swirling in his mind. "Have we met before?" he finally asked, his tone tinged with uncertainty.

A playful grin danced across y/n's lips as she teased, "I don't know. Have we?"

Bucky felt a pang of surprise at her cheekiness, but he pressed on, recounting the memory of rescuing a girl from a dangerous situation in a park. "I can't help but see similarities between her and you," he admitted, his browdls furrowing with concern. "So, you think that I'm her?" y/n's tone was light, teasing, but there was a hint of something more beneath the surface.

He hesitated, grappling with the uncertainty of his own memories. "I'm not sure...I never saw her face," he confessed, his voice tinged with regret. Y/n rolled her eyes playfully, a mischievous glint in her gaze. "Took you long enough to notice," she quipped, her words laced with humour.

Shocked with the revelation, his words stumbled, "But, but she's a beta, and you're..."He trailed off, his voice trailing as he struggled to find the right words. "An omega. Always was, still am," She finished for him, a knowing smile playing on her lips.

"But your scent?" Bucky questioned, his confusion evident in his voice, “It changed?”

"Scent blockers," She explained simply, her tone softening as she reached out to brush a stray lock of hair away from his face. "It's a long story, we'll get there soon enough. But for now..." She trailed off, her gaze meeting his with a warmth that sent shivers down his spine. "How have you been, Alpha?"

Bucky felt his heartstrings pull at the affection in her words, and without hesitation, he pulled her close, burying his face in the crook of her neck as he inhaled her scent deeply. "Better. Much better, 'mega," he murmured, his voice filled with a tenderness that spoke volumes.

Bucky briefly pulled away from her, their eyes locked in a silent exchange and he felt a surge of tenderness wash over him, his heart swelling with affection for this beautiful woman who had stolen his heart. He reached out instinctively, brushing a stray lock of hair away from y/n's face, his touch as gentle as a whisper.

As Bucky leaned in closer, the soft brush of his breath against y/n's lips sent a thrill through her. His eyes, filled with a gentle intensity, held hers captive as he closed the distance between them. With a tender touch, he pressed his lips softly against hers, a delicate caress that ignited a spark between them.

In that moment, time seemed to stand still as their lips met in a sweet and innocent kiss. She felt a rush of warmth flood through her, enveloping her in a cocoon of bliss. His kiss was like a gentle breeze on a warm summer day, soft and inviting, yet undeniably electrifying.

Y/n herself could feel the steady beat coming from between her thighs, she was pretty sure Bucky could feel it too. Of course he could, and he enjoyed the symphony of longing and desire that pulsed against his thigh. If she ever snuck her tiny hands on his crotch, she would know how much he enjoyed her soft lips; and her pretty princess part.

As they melted into each other's embrace, she lost herself in the sensation of his lips against hers; his hands rubbing the naked skin underneath her shirt.

While she was floating in the clouds, Bucky was at the brink of his sanity. He wanted to make his claim on her, to have her entirely to himself. and when the kiss deepened, he couldn’t contain his needy growl. His thick thigh naturally settled in between hers, gently guiding her hips down and her heat against the layer of his jeans.

Just as things began to heat up, a soft whine emanated from Daisy's crib, breaking the spell and bringing them back to reality. They pulled away from each other with shared laughter, their cheeks flushed with embarrassment as they realised they had been caught in the act by their tiny charge.

She glanced over at Daisy with a fond smile, her heart swelling with affection for the little interrupter. "So much for a second date, huh?" she joked, her tone laced with amusement.

Bucky met her gaze with a grin of his own, his eyes twinkling with mirth. "I wouldn't want it any other way," he replied, his voice filled with sincerity; they shared a final kiss, a promise of more to come, before turning their attention back to Daisy, who had already drifted back into a peaceful slumber.

As they settled back into their makeshift nest on the floor, Bucky and y/n knew that their love story was just beginning – a tale of unexpected encounters, stolen kisses, and the sweet promise of a future together.

End.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: im in my soft feels latelyyyyy and i miss this couple 😭 anyway, i hope you enjoyed this short fic 🤍

[penvisions]

of beskar and kyber {chapter 17}

Pairing: Din Djarin x Force Sensitive! Reader (the Mandalorian x Force Sensitive! Reader)

Summary: Din Djarin is not a remorseful man. Everything he's done, he's done for a reason. But he finds himself in an internal struggle as he tears through the galaxy for traces of you.

Word Count: 10.3k

Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical fighting, use of narcotics, use of drugs, reader gets drugged, reader gets kidnapped, reader gets tied up, kidnapping, controlling parent, toxic parent / child relationship, toxic parent / child dynamic, din has a lot of feelings, din reflects on his time spent with reader, death, minor character death, infectious thoughts, negative feelings, feelings of inadequacy, issues with intimacy, religious guilt, feelings of religious obligation, religious contemplation, so much guilt for our tin man, violence, derogative language, insinuations of sexual favors, a few instances of shouting, din loses his hold on reality (1) time, references to past instances of self-harm, references to past instances of suicidal ideations, let me know if i missed anything please!

A/N: an all din pov chapter, baby! who's ready for ten thousand words on how this man feels? this was a fun different way to approach the story and i rather liked it even if i am afraid to post it. there are so many different interpretations of din that are all so great, and while this is my personal one for the character in my fic, i'm still worried about how it'll be received

ao3 link || series masterlist || main masterlist || ko-fi

“Mother, please.” You begged, voice absolutely wrecked. Desperation settled in your gut, making you dizzy and nauseous. The illness of it was debilitating even through the hum of drugs waning in your system. Sobs were wracking your body, exploding from your ribcage in painful bursts. You struggled against the cuffs on your wrists, the cuffs around your ankles, rotating them in hopes of finding weakness but they were strong. But they were made of beskar, strong and programmed to shock you should you jostle them too much. Using the culture of the very people who had meant salvation now for damnation. She had made sure they would hold you this time.

She just sat there, watching you from the chair by the door. Long hair pulled up into a knot atop her head, blue tunic and black trousers flowing and clean. Her hands clasped in front of her, resting her chin against them as her eyes took in the slump of your form across the small room. You were on the ground, legs numb from the hard, unforgiving stone underneath you. Boots removed and down to nothing but your simple clothing. She had taken the pendant from you, the one Din had gifted you in the wake of your confession to losing the one from Akiz. It glinted over her own chest, visible where she allowed it to drape over the front of her collar.

“Please. I don’t want to be here. I want to go back to the ship. I want to go home.”

“Oh no, my darling, you won’t be going anywhere near that disgusting ship again. That Mandalorian has caused enough damage, stealing you away after taking your fob. I still had to pay the Guild fee for your bounty. Credits you know we didn’t have in the first place.” She paused, her hands clasped together, elbows on her knees, and she leaned forward to rest her hand atop them. A wicked smile overtook her as she eyed you across the room.

“Luckily, I found someone who was willing to cover the cost and offer to take you as their wife. They’ve put a lot of energy and credits into helping locate you. They will be here in two days’ time to collect you.”

She looked almost mournful at the idea of you leaving so soon after reuniting. Of sharing you with another after claiming to do everything she had ever done to you out of protection.

“But he swore to protect you from any threats, from the Mandalorians that seem to be obsessed with owning you, harnessing your power to help them crawl from the cracks of the universe they ran to hide in when their planet was destroyed. This man, he’s from a very important royal line that is deeply rooted in the New Republic.”

“The New Republic is a joke, they can’t even keep their own soldiers happy, let alone protect anyone.”

“Hush now, darling.” She got up and the black tin she kept in her pocket flashed in her hand. You began thrashing even more so, tears cascading down your cheeks as she approached you. The click of the tin opening sent you back to every other time you had heard that sound in your life, eyes going wide and your breath left you as if you had been hit square in the chest. “The time will fly by with this dose and then we’ll be off to our new home.”

He’d been searching the city for days.

Despite the thrumming of pain through his head, his vision blurring, and the helmet resting too heavy on the now soft, new skin that was his injury. Tender fingers carefully spraying bacta and skin itching as the tissue tried to heal with its aid. He wished for your smaller hands to be the one caring for him, but he was alone. Alone with a fussing child that was beginning to use his powers to get his feelings across since he was still learning how to talk and use his little voice.

Not taking any time to rest, instincts telling him something was wrong, that something had happened. You wouldn’t just run off, even with what had occurred. At least…not for this long. He hoped. He…hoped.

Stalking through the various casinos and cantina’s, searching for any traces of you to be found. Even in the hectic atmospheres of the racetracks and brothels, of seedier bars and establishments you may have ducked into or been taken to by the force of whoever had stolen you away. Snatched you from whatever you had sought out to calm yourself.

He sat in front of the tracking fob given to him when he first took the job to return you to your mother for hours. Set it atop the control panels in the cockpit, helmet removed and head in his hands as he contemplated turning the device back on. He had scoured the hotels and seedier hostels with it in his grip, to no avail.

It was as if you had simply vanished.

Your smiles and laughter, soft sighs and teasing quips a figment of his imagination.

Made up in the loneliness that accompanied the type of life he led. Missions, jobs, hunting, tracking, trading in criminals and runaways for next to nothing, refueling the ship and hitting the ground running again, taking to the air and space again. And again, and again. He didn’t realize how tired and monotonous it had all become, despite the thrill of his skills proofing to be elite time and time again. He didn’t realize how much he had been missing out on until you threw it all off track. Deliver the goods and credits to the covert, ensure they were safe and protected, collect another job, hunt, track, kill, injure, collect. Broke the routine he had been so accustomed to with an utterance of his dying language.  Rolling off your tongue with precision.

It had been striking. You had been striking and he had torn you down in a way he never wanted to, unintentionally with a fumbling lack of words. It was maddening, to search for days to find no trace of you anywhere.

There was no indication you ever existed aside from those left behind on his ship. The mug of caf sweetened with sugar and powdered milk at the table, the pack of your cigarras you always insisted on smoking outside while it was docked, the crate with your tools and materials used to make armor, the neat and organized labels you had applied to everything within the panels. The room he had set up for you….though you often split your time between his own and the hammock still hung up in the hold space.

He had left it all untouched, too afraid to erase the pieces of evidence that you were real. That you had been aboard his ship. That you had been trying to connect with him and he stumbled over his words so badly he made you feel unwanted on such a level that made you run.

Like the acts between you two had just been him seeking out pleasure with no real intent other than that behind them. The thought that you must’ve felt like he was just like every other person who had ever used you made his stomach turn and bile burn in his throat. Only his ploys had been steeped in honey and saccharine promises. He had frozen, the words he wanted to whisper to you lost in the panic of the moment, of wanting exactly what you were asking for. It had all been so overwhelming. It had been so real, felt so real, and it had been a jarring realization.

That he had wanted to remove his helmet and give into your request.

Despite the Creed he swore his life to. Despite the commitment he had made to you that would allow for him to do so in time.

But now it was too little too late.

After the third day, he was beginning to think you weren’t merely taking some time to yourself…

Maybe he was foolish to think he hadn’t messed up so monumentally that you had found a way off world and run even further from him. But he knew you weren’t the type of person to do that. To him, to ad’ika.

Burc’ya. Friend.

Ner kar’ta. My heart.

Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum. I love you.

Vencuyot riduur. Future husband.

You wouldn’t have run from him to that degree, loyal and devoted. Loving and caring, kind hearted at the very core of who you were. Even despite the tragedies and ill-natured things you had been subjected to in your life. Good. Too good, for someone like him.

He was beginning to think something had happened.

But without the aid of your communication, vambraces still set atop the makeshift table along with your main bag and armor, he had no way of knowing for sure. Just the niggling feeling in his gut that was burrowing deeper by the second.

He sent a transmission to Karga, asking if there was any news of your arrest before deeming the planet a lost cause and raising the ramp. He took the Crest up up up and into the air, helmet scouring the shrinking planet all the while, feeling an ache in his heart that he didn’t think he would ever get used to.

He had to push through, he had to focus. You needed someone to help you, wherever you had gone or been taken. You needed him to find you. He needed to find you.

Ad’ika had been in a constant flux from eerily silent to wailing as loud as his little lungs would allow, wide eyes brimming with tears the longer you were gone. Din had taken to wrapping the child up in the cloak he had bought you, securing it with the metallic flower latches and laying him down in the cot alongside him. Never sleeping, only laying down intermittently to pass the time. Rest evading him as his mind began to think of the things that could’ve happened to you.

Tatooine was his first stop, no response from Karga when he docked and secured the ship in Pelli’s hangar. Much to his disappointment, the travel through hyperspace hadn’t been too long, so a response was wishful thinking on his part. Spurred on by the endless possibilities of what happened consuming him.

He was silent as he handed her the credits from your bag, loathing that he needed to use them as he lacked his own. Even now, gone from him and hurt, you were still offering him help. Providing for him the way he should be for you, the way that he wanted to. The reality of having asked you to travel with him weighing heavily on his mind. Once ad’ika is settled with those who could train him, Din would need to take up working with the Guild full time again to provide for the covert. A life steeped in danger and endless threats, a life you already had far too much experience with. Perhaps…perhaps he could secure a tract of land somewhere, a place to return to after jobs. A nice cabin surrounded by trees and an endless supply of anything you may need. Or perhaps a shop front on Nevarro, for you to sell you wares. He would take extra jobs to provide that for you, work his hands to the bone and until he could barely move for how exhausted he was.

Because you deserved it. You deserved to be happy and he was beginning to think that may not be with him. Not if he was constantly away or you were left on the ship for days, weeks, months at a time while he tracked down his quarries. Constantly traveling through space and left to handle the ship alone.

Would…would you even want that type of life?

Wouldn’t it be another type of imprisonment, no reward but a tired and aching man in the bed beside you only a handful of nights? Half of him given to you, half devoted to his Creed.

I’d rather be dead than be someone’s captive again. Even if it’s as one to you, jatne vod.

Thoughts consuming him, there was no argument from him as he left ad’ika with her to look through the city.

The lack of your figure emerging from the ship didn’t prompt any questions from her, though he could sense them on the tip of her tongue and the front of her mind.

He set out, looking for the woman who you made friends with the last time he had landed the Crest on the sandy planet.

He found her, in the middle of a scuffle in the marketplace over a stolen loaf of bread. A child whose stomach was caved in and bruises over their arms visible when the sleeves of their tunic rose up. The vendor wanted the child to be taken in, punished for the attempted theft. But he could see how conflicted Sioban was with following that heated demand.

Diffusing the situation, seeing the form he had first encountered you in mirrored in the small child, he stepped forward and offered a handful of credits to the vendor.

“To cover the bread for the child, two loaves and that chunk of cured meat.”

“Sir, this has nothing to do with you. You don’t need to put yourself out for that ungrateful litte-“

“Take it.” Din’s head throbbed, exhausted and anxious, just trying to do something good. Something you would do. They were your credits, and he wanted to do this. At the fixed stare of his visor, the vendor released the child from her tight grip, nearly throwing the small frame to the ground as she did. Roughly, she gathered the loaf that had started the whole ordeal, a second one, and the wrapped meat. Holding it out for him to take.

Sioban ushered everyone who had stopped in their tracks to go about their business. Once the small crowd cleared and attention was diverted, Din turned to the child and crouched down.

“Here, for you.” He kept his voice a hush, not wanting the modulator to manipulate his voice into a threatening or menacing tone it tended to do, taking the emotion from his words more often than not.

“T-thank you, sir.”

“Now go and stay out of trouble.”

An enthusiastic nod and they were running off, disappearing down the street.

“Well, well, well. Mando is a softie afterall.” Sioban’s voice lightly teased. “Where’s Sarad and the baby? Or is this a solo trip this time around?”

“I would like to speak with you, if you have the time.”

“Something happened.” The woman’s features hardened, a slant to her brow as her eyes looked him over before settling on the visor. She didn’t look or feel like a threat, something proven further by your willingness to share a table with the woman. But Din was fighting his instincts, the ones telling him to chase chase chase, even with no actual leads as to where you had gone. And this woman might hold some clues or at least be able to offer Din a higher chance if he had someone on the ground of the planet you had run to once already.

“Yes.”

The conversation with Sioban hadn’t yielded any answers. If anything, it solidified that Din had absolutely no idea what to do. With no other leads, he fell back on his tracking tactics, searching for your last place of known residence.

Once back to the ship, he silently takes ad’ika from Pelli. Not responding to the looks or faint questioning he knew was on the woman’s mind. A nod, a formal shaking of the woman’s hand and he was guiding the Crest back into the air to comb over the planet as best he could. You had said you thought you were here when he took you from that compound, a home you had hidden away on this world after running from your mother years ago.

It took him nearly a week’s worth of days of flying low to the land before he caught sight of a structure.

Mind working overdrive as he strained his eyes through the visor with aided mechanics for any sign of life amid the vast stretch of the desert landscape. Sectors outlined and crossed out when they didn’t yield anything. Errant skeletons of a bantha, the Jawa’s traveling across the land, and Tusken settlements the only markers of time passing and the ship moving moderately along.

And then, suddenly.

There were two tall spires beside a moderate looking abode. Moisture farming equipment, the same you had told him about replacing shortly before your capture. Was all he had to go off of, a small conversation that you hadn’t expanded on in your time with him.

The structure was like most far out into the desert, mostly underground with a rounded and smooth stone roof, a door with a protected entrance to prevent sand from building up right up against it. It was modest, big enough for one person to have plenty of room. Abandoned, by his guess, the stone of the building chipped in places from sand and the spare storm weathering it down.

It had to be yours, it had to be, please let it be yours were his thoughts as he broke the lock still activated, ensuring the structure was protected even out in the middle of nowhere. Mos Eisley was an entire day’s travel away. Even more so in any other direction to another of the planets handful of moderate settlements. A good place to hide. Visibility on your side. A lonely place to hide.

I’ve always loved the forest.

The memory how your tired and injured features had lit up at the sight of Sorgan visible through the glass of the cockpit, the breathy gasp that had fallen from your lips sprung to his mind. You had been so calm, despite the precarious circumstances, stealing away moments to brush your bare fingers along the leaves reaching out from low branches.

You must’ve been miserable here. The land so dry and empty, the closest mountain ridges barely visible on the horizon. Even those were spotty with tangled roots that held little to no greenery. Sentencing yourself to the wasteland to live out your life in fear and comfortability, hoping the environment you weren’t fond of would throw those searching for you off your trail.

Glancing behind him, Din watched as ad’ika slowly made his way down the ramp. Little sounds falling from his lips as he took in the sight of his guardian in front of a new place he didn’t recognize. Raising his hands as he got to the bottom of it, Din retreated to it and lifted up the small child, holding him tight in the crook of his elbow as he descended down the few steps and through the open door.

It was dark inside, no lights on or power source even charged, no doubt. But definitely abandoned. Sparingly decorated, though he could feel that it was once your space. The kitchen equipped with a fancy caf maker, ample kitchen wares, potted plants and herbs that had long died and dried in the sunlight coming in through the windows. There was an impressively organized wall of shelving right above a desk in the large main room, presumably where you would work on crafting armor. The only way to support yourself in such an environment. Most likely making trips into town in order to sell or trade.

There were three interior doors at the back of the structure. A heavy duty one off to the side of the kitchen. That one contained a greenhouse set up, or as close to one as you could imitate underground and on so hot a planet. There was a large panel of controls beside the door on the inside, telling Din of the way you controlled the pressure and moisture of the room One to a storage room, more evidence of your time spent here. Full of large bins and crates, evidence of grains and dried food. Of the pieces of armor you lovingly and intricately crafted.

One to a fresher, the last to what was once your bedroom.

Underneath the bed is where he found it, with the aid of his helmet. The massive rug that took up most of the bedroom floor hiding it in plain sight. The trap door exposed when he moved the bed and folded the rug up.

It wasn’t secured with anything that he could see, even with the aid of his helmet. It looked just like score marks dug into the stone ground. And he recalled the way you could effortlessly wield the Force, the power you shared with the child. Perhaps you hadn’t wanted a way for anyone else to access what lay hidden beneath, using it to manipulate the hideaway you felt you needed even this deep in the desert alone. Forever paranoid and fearful of being tracked down and found out.

Sighing, Din tried to think of a way to break the barrier, knowing he needed to search the entire home.

“Ad’ika,” He called, turning to see the child had situated himself on the couch in the main room. Eyes wide as he toyed with a broken collar. He wondered if it had belonged to a creature you had cared for, run away or long since passed now. “Ad’ika, can you help me?”

Leaning down to pick up the occupied child, Din pointed a gloved finger to the marks in the stone ground.

“Ad’ika, see these lines?” A gurgle of acknowledgement, the tilting of his head. “There’s a door here, that leads underground. Mesh’la put it there, do you think you can open it?”

Din set him down in front of it, crouching down to hold his hand out in front of them both and mimic the way you would twist your hand in concentration to harness your powers.

“Just like Mesh’la, like how you take the handle from the lever in the control room?”

Wide eyes looked up at him, curiosity in them at the man’s words.

If this didn’t work…he could always resort to using the charges fastened to his belt. Force a way through the entrance, but he didn’t want to damage the space or the room below.

But the crackling of stone was sharp as it sounded in the air. The child’s small face scrunched up in concentration, his eyes clenched shut as he harnessed his powers. Quiet grunts falling from his mouth as he struggled to move the stone.

But it was working. It was opening, the telltale sounds of stone grinding on stone as the thick slab that acted as an entrance was pried open.

“Good job, ad’ika! It’s working!” He couldn’t contain the pride in his voice nor the rapid beating of his heart. Positive that any answers he was in search of would dwell below. He moved forward to help lift the heavy slab, shoving it along the floor and revealing a dark space into the lower level of the house.

Turning on the flashlight of his helmet, Din descended into the bowels of your hideaway. Dust enveloped him as he waved at ad’ika to stay put on the higher level until he cleared the space.

It was a large room, the same size as the whole top floor of the structure. Though it was only two rooms, a living room and a bedroom with a second fresher. The living room held floor to ceiling bookcases, filled to the brim with physical books. A holo net in front of the couch, signs that you spent just as much time down here as you did in the rest of the structure if not more.  He hated the realization that you felt the need to hide away even this far out in the desert, this far out in the galaxy. Forever paranoid and holding the fear that you would be tracked down. And he had been a part of that fear, he had been one of the many who had sought you out.

The crate in the bedroom caught his eye, beckoning him forward. Not only because of the hefty locks sealing it shut but because there was energy around it that made the tips of his fingers tingle. Much like his blood when he felt your body pressed up to his own, the sacrament of your trust in him personified.

Walking toward it, the small baby curls of his recently trimmed hair prickled on the back of his neck.

Snapping the thick locks, he kneeled on the ground in front of it and slowly lifted the lid.

His breath left him as the visor set into a midnight blue, almost black Mandalorian helmet peered back up at him. It was in pristine condition, as if it had merely been taken off for the man who he suspected wore it to partake in a quick meal and not the reality that it had been stored here for who knows how many years untouched. He hadn’t asked if you had kept it, after the man’s death, but he was felt the question bubble on his tongue more than once. But the answer was sitting obvious and blaring right in front of him.

Lifting it revealed the very same pendant he had gifted to you, attached to a thinly crafted beskar chain.

The one you had said you intended to show him in order to garner his help, to let him know of your connection to his way of life. Lost in the scuffle of being taken off guard and whisked away, but it was here, awaiting your return. He wondered why you hadn’t worn it that day, the day that set your paths up to cross. With slow movements, he began to remove the cowl about his neck, laying it down beside him.

With a held breath, he reached for the pendant and fastened it around his neck, tucking it beneath his shirt and layers of protective ware fronted by his cuirass. The cowl going back in place.

Beside the helmet…beside it was a neatly arranged line of metal hilts similar to the one you carried with you at all times. Similar to the one you had tried to buy your freedom from him with when first meeting.

Similar but not identical.

There were four of them. Lightsabers, you had told him they were called. That he now knew were an integral part of the creed you had been trained in. But the fact remained that he didn’t know the why of how many you had in your possession.

You had said each person similar in skill and training crafted their own, each unique and personal to an individual much like the helmets and armor Mandalorian’s adorned. Carefully picking one up, tingling traveling further up his arms and settling down his back, he tilted it to see that it did indeed house a crystal like your own. Each one had a different hue.

He decided to stay in the place that you once called home that night, locking up the ship after checking to see if he had received word from Karga. But when there were transmissions waiting to be heard, he secured the ship. His head hurting and his mind overwhelmed at finding pieces of you, proof that you existed outside of his memories.

Settling into the bed, he knew it was a lost cause as he tried to feel close to you. Reality reminding him you hadn’t slept in either of the cots aboard the ship in nearly two weeks now, years for the bed he now lay atop, cover bunched underneath his arms as he curled on his side and regarded the journal you left behind in your haste to run. Ad’ika resting atop the pillow beside his own, wrapped in your cloak as if it was the softest blanket in the universe. The child trying to feel close to you as well, missing you and growing more concerned each day.

Sleep evaded him, your voice loud in his head, the way you had sounded so devoid of emotion when he had failed to communicate with you. Tipping into different memories, the most prominent of the events back on Nevarro.

It rang in his ears, over and over, layering itself until it was a buzz he couldn’t rid himself of.

Ner kar’ta.

The desperation in your voice, the tears in your eyes, the way your hands shook as they reached out for him, how gentle they were when they cradled his helmet. The soft press of your forehead to his chest, to his helmet, to his hands grasped in your own as he lay bloodied and injured, barely conscious and so tired. So ready for death after a life that had only allowed him a glimpse of you. To ensure you could escape and continue to live, to be safe.

You had told him, as well as you could, what you meant to him.

Had shown him, with trusting him to press his skin to yours, body tangled with his own. Nervous giggles sounding into the air and seizing his heart as he wanted for more of them. Of the breathy sighs and sounds that fell from your lips as you let him caress your skin, the soft give of your chest, the plush give of your thighs, the velvet smooth apex between them.

Trusted him with the most intimate parts of you, parts of human connection. Even in the face of all that you had endured.

And then you has whispered it, half asleep and safe underneath him.

I love you. Future husband.

And he shattered it. With a foolish blunder of words he hadn’t been able to reign in, to explain himself and his own desires in a more coherent way. That he wanted you just as you wanted him.

Jatne vod.

Contradicted with the emotion bleeding from your expressive eyes, the firm line of your lips as you closed your mouth, resigned to a notion that you gathered from his stupid, ill thought-out words. From his lack of words. The way your hands shook for an entirely different reason, the way you shrunk into yourself, away from him.

And then you had been gone.

And it hurt.

He left ad’ika in the room, fast asleep atop the pillows.

Removing his helmet and hanging his head in his hands, he settled on the couch. For the first time in a long time, the Mandalorian known for being so ruthless, for being so focused and emotionless behind his helmet, cried.  

“Mando, I’ve received word. But it is best relayed in person. I will be awaiting your arrival.”

Ad’ika was not having a good day, he didn’t want to leave the house he could feel your presence in. He had already wailed and shook his tiny fists as Din tried to pick up him. Causing the migraine addled man to lose his grip at the sharp pierce of his cries to his head. That had only resulted in the thump of ad’ika’s bottom on the stone floor and more crying.

Din already felt bad enough, but he felt like the worst guardian in the galaxy for dropping his foundling, for not being able to manage his own pain and discomfort to care for another’s. A pang of fear floods him, igniting his instincts in a way it rarely did. And he froze in his crouched position, having been about to scoop ad’ika up.

The child must’ve shared in his foreboding, a shriek sprouting from him and causing Din to cradle his head as best he could with the helmet, knees kissing the floor harshly as he fell to them.

Something was wrong. Low in his gut, unease bubbled and stuck to his insides.

He felt like he was going to be sick, his head throbbing, pain prickling from the healing scar at the back.

And then his body felt numb, like all sense of command was not his to control and his vision blacked out.

Nevarro loomed in the distance, approaching fast. The ship rattled at the harsh landing, Din’s steps hard and fast as he disembarked, the ramp closing behind him as he crossed the new archway that had been erected in the time he had been away. Months had gone by, one with you and one without. Having to spend another week resting in the place you once called home. He had fallen ill, though of what he didn’t have an answer. Only that his head felt like he had been electrocuted and his limbs had been hard to control. Adi’ka too, had been lethargic, crying out long into the night every time the suns had set and darkness took over the planet. The search for you stretching far too long, anxiety thrumming over his skin.

Karga was in the reconstructed city hall, reading over something laid out on the table when the door boomed open, revealing the determined figure of Din, a secretary behind him frantically trying to warn the man in charge of his arrival.

“Where?”

“Sir, please, you need to check in-“

“It’s alright, he’s got clearance.” With a nod the woman was closing the door behind her, knowing it was serious if all protocol was being ignored.

Din repeated his question, forgoing a formal greeting.

“Well, I wish these were better circumstances.” The man stood up, coming around the table and leaned against it, his arms crossed over his chest as he took in the still form of Din across the room. The wide eyes of the child peeking out from the bag at his hip, small hands allowing him to climb from within it and jump from the moderate height. He cooed, walking the distance to Karga and lifting his hands toward the man.

“I’m still trying to get intel on that. But I do know that it was her mother, who struck a deal with someone of the Guild. He…was here still when we took back the city. He had taken the transaction separate from the Guild, not wanting word of it to get back to me. To you.” He relayed the information as he bent down to pick up the small being.

“I’ve got him locked up, but he’s not speaking.”

“He will.”

“Mando-“

He was gone in a blink, stalking out the door and toward the prison cells kept on the lowest floor of the building.

The stone steps opened up to a line of cells on both sides of the long room, Din stopped in front of the only occupied one. Body buzzing with anger that the inhabitant had not only hunted you down and captured you but did so on the orders of someone who’s voice triggered you through a transmission. He couldn’t begin to imagine the visceral reaction you’d have upon seeing her for the first time in years, having entertained the thought of killing yourself in order to not have to deal with her again.

And he feared, heat catching in his throat as he felt the prickle of tears.

I’d rather be dead than be shackled for one more second of my life!

You…you wouldn’t, right? Now that you had him to return to, someone to rescue you from being stolen away from the life you had carved out for yourself. It had been so long since you had been taken, days, weeks, and entire month. And he still had no clue as to where you had been crated off to. It would be more days, more weeks, maybe another month before he could figure it out. Did you already seize an unknown opportunity, try to escape? Or had you given up, too loaded up with whatever drugs your mother and intended pumped into your system to make you compliant? Would you have taken the endless out of harming yourself, seeing it as the only option as he failed to come to your aid thus far?

Would you be able to sense the desperation and endless efforts he was putting forth to find you? That he was trying, despite the way he was still healing, despite the sense of dread that he would be too late?

Would you be able to sense his worry and fear over you having to deal with something you never wished for? A forced reunion with your mother, back in her clutches and control. A forced marriage to a man you didn’t know, the obligations that came along with that notion…the very same acts that had caused you to turn to self-harm in the past, the scars of which were displayed on the skin of your thighs, the same ones that he had run his fingers over not too long ago…

A man bound in cuffs was slumped against the floor, back leaning on the wall behind him. He appeared to be alive, though if his answers didn’t aid Din in his search for you he wouldn’t be for long. Giving into the urge to startle the unaware man, Din banged a fist on the bars of the cell. Jerking awake, the man’s eyes flew open and his chest heaved.

The second he recognized the armor, his eyes narrowed and he frowned.

“It was just a job, nothing personal, Mando.”

“Is that why you went out of your way to hide it from the Guild records?”

“You’re too self-righteous, knew you’d come after me for hunting the girl.”

The snapping of metal was loud, sickening as Din’s shoulders forced the control panel to bend and spark.

The whine of the door swinging open deafening as the man pressed himself back into the wall, trying to get up on his feet. But he was too slow, Din’s hands hauling the man up by the front of his jumpsuit and slamming him into the wall. A crack sounded as the back of the man’s head connected with the stone of the wall. A wail punched from his chest as he lost the air in his lungs.

“It’s too late, her mother married her off to some high lord. She’s probably already knocked up with his heir by now. Living a cush life in some nice palace far away from here.” He spoke unprompted by a direct question. Knowing that it was useless to try and lie to the Mandalorian.

The mere thought of someone touching you had anger swirling in his chest and stomach, igniting him in a dangerous way. You didn’t like people touching you, you didn’t like anyone who wasn’t him touching you in any way let alone intimately. His voice was low when he breathed out his next question, an edge to it that commanded the truth.

“Where?”

“Don’t know, I told her mother you were probably going to find out, track me down and kill me for the information. Don’t know why.” The man flipped the stray hairs flopping over his forehead away, teeth clenching as he recalled the way you had slammed him harshly into the side of the alley.  “The bitch has a pretty face, sure, but she was a handful. Took a lot to take her out, but once I did, she begged so sweet for me to let her go.”

“Drugging someone isn’t something to boast about, it’s a last-ditch effort for those who don’t have the skill for the job.” Din’s words were a guttural sound, echoing across the floor. Blood dripped from the man’s nose, a vambrace knocked into it the longer the man talked. He didn’t know anything, but that wouldn’t stop Din from beating what he could out of the man.

“So what? It took her down and that’s what mattered. I saw her take down those Storm Troopers that overran the city, there was no way I was going to be able to without the hint from her mother. You’ll find another body to warm your bed. No need to fret over-“

Din’s hand was around the man’s throat in a flash, knuckles popping with the force. An ugly gurgle deep in his chest, body desperate for air, but he would never take another breath again. Windpipe crushing under his palm, Din took some comfort in the final, choked sound the man made before his body went limp.

Before it could even crumple to the ground, Din was walking out of the room and going straight toward the stairs.  

“Mando, I sent communication to Cara, she’s-“

“I’ve got what I need.” Din was careful as he lifted the child from atop the desk where Karga had set him with a snack. Exchanging adoring coos with the tired little being. Making sure to offer the rest of the pack of dried fruit to the claws reaching out for it, a whine falling from his mouth at the idea of leaving it behind.

“Not so fast-“

“I don’t have time. I need to find her.” Din snapped, fists clenching and ad’ika ducking down into the bag at the boom of his voice. “She’s been sold like a slave by her mother.”

“I’m going with you,” Cara was firm in her decision, not wanting to take any chances of your distance becoming permanent. Of it leading to the demise of the person who you had begun to develop into that she had glimpsed.

“No, I have to handle this myself. I was the one who failed to protect her.” He moved to continue through the room, toward the door. But Cara was suddenly in front of him, her arms crossed over her chest and her lips a firm line.

“Mando, you’re gonna need help. And she’s important to me too.”

It was a quiet trek back to the entrance of the city, more ships having landed around his own. He was about to engage the ramp when two of the attending guards approached him. But they spoke with Cara at the sharp gaze of the visor on them. Another ship was offered for them to use, curtesy of the city and of Karga. Something a little smaller, a little faster, nondescript and wouldn’t give away the presence of an enraged and desperate Mandalorian searching for his partner.

When the argument for a different ship didn’t take, Karga approached through the archway.

Cara was hesitant to point out that the ship was as obvious as Din’s armor. A sign to tip off those keeping an eye out for threats. She had been quiet, sitting in the office with the magistrate and the child while the body of the now deceased Guild member who had hunted you down was taken care of. Waiting for Din to emerge from the containment level. But now she stood beside him, urging him to see the benefits to changing ships, just for the time being.

“Do we risk docking the ship in a hangar?”

“Yes, we lie about the model.” Din insisted, not wanting to leave the Crest behind.

“What if someone knows?”

“It’s an old ship, pre-Empire, no one will know.”

“They’ll run it through the system.” Karga spoke up, wanting to be a voice of reason for his friend determined to rush, to not take a beat and think things through. “Mando, you owe it to her to be as stealthy as possible. If they know you’re coming, once you track down where, they may hurt her. Take it out on her.”

Din closed his eyes, hand coming to the front of his helmet and over the visor. He didn’t want to part ways with his ship, even temporarily. It would mean he wasn’t surrounded by the things you left behind, the proof that you were real, had been with him, shared in a life with him even for a moment.

With his words more of a grunt than anything, he conceded, knowing the two beside him were just trying to help.

“What did you do Mando?” She asked quietly, the book from your crate in her hands and pages flipping as she looked through it. Hoping to find some light on how to connect with you. Din had gathered supplies from the Crest, things you may want once he managed to find you and rescue you.Your armor and more of your clothing, the first things he packed into your bag. An insistence for you to never leave the ship without the pauldrons again that he would plead with you until you conceded. People would be less likely to confront you with the tell-tale signet of a clan and the Mandalorian armor. But then again, he never planned to stray far from you outside of the ship. He knew you were capable, more than capable, but he…he wouldn’t be able to handle loosing you again if he was able to get you back.

When he got you back, he argued against the self-depreciating and negative thoughts that were attempting to consume him.

The ship was in hyperspace, a three-day trip ahead of them to make it to the mid rim coordinates of your home world. Neither had been there but knew of the inhabitants being an uneven mix of humans and a reptilian race. Oceans and sprawling fields of tall grass making up most of the environment. It was a moderately size planet, had seen bases for both the Resistance and the Empire in it’s time. Though the more recent had been the former. Most likely spurred on by your suspected return to what you knew in the wake of the Temple’s attack. An event in your life that you had yet to open up completely about, allowing him small glimpses before it became to much to talk about. But it was easy to connect the fall of Mandalore and the fall of your Temple being equally devastating, an attempt to take out entire cultures.

“I…I made a mistake.”

“…how big of a mistake?” Cara didn’t look up from the journal in her hands, not wanting to make the armored man feel cornered. Allowing him the privacy and space to turn away from the question should he want to, feel the need to.

“She fled the ship, to get some space. She must’ve been distracted, too worked up to keep her head up and on alert. It…I’m the reason she was taken.”

“Mando, you know that’s not true.” Cara tried to placate him, knowing he carried a lot of guilt over what had happened, whatever it had been to cause all of this. “She didn’t have her saber?”

“She does- did. She.. they drugged her. Like you said, it’s the only way to take her down.”

“Wait, this looks like Basic. They’re the only characters written differently…”

Din was hovering, making out the words on his own.

“Betrothed.”

He recalled the same words falling from your lips, the reason that prompted you to make an escape. You hadn’t wanted to be someone’s wife, someone’s property. The name was in Basic as well, something you didn’t want to forget lest they come after you themselves. A shadow of your past hovering over you and hidden in the back of your mind as you set out on your own, determined to hide yourself away to prevent anyone from having power over you. Of belonging to someone, anyone ever again.

And yet…you had so readily agreed in his commitment to you, knowing that was the only way Din would be able to share in your affections and wants. Mandalorian religion and culture strictly forbade the removal of one’s helmet unless it was with family, with a spouse, with children of the same clan. To do so outside of those conditions would result in the label of an apostate. Striped of their involvement in the lifestyle and Creed. It was a serious thing you should hold reservations about, with your past.

And while he hadn’t pushed the parameters of it….he had wanted to. For you, for himself, to share himself with you in the way that you had felt safe enough to voice. The realization that you had agreed to such an all-encompassing thing, being with him made him reflect. Why were you willing to do so with him, for him? He was just a bounty hunter, one who had actively sought you out and intended to turn you into the very person who had stolen you away. Sold you like an object to someone for their wants and needs, to fill a space in their life whichever way they commanded it. He had been of the same mind when first encountering you, seeking you out for a trade of currency.

Din was not a good man, though he tried to be for his people. But being a good man to his people, being the sole provider for his covert allowed him to be fast and loose with what it meant to be good in order to do so. What did it matter if the person whose puck he had was truly guilty of the accusations calling for their surrender if it allowed him to delivery credits and supplies to his people? What did it matter if the job warranted for the person he was tracking to be delivered dead or alive and he chose to kill them based on the simple notion of them running and it allowed him to bring a ration of meals to his people?

What had he ever done to deserve someone such as yourself willing to let down your walls and allow him entrance? He had been at internal war, whether or not to turn you in the second you spoke Mando’a to him, healed him, saved him from that second raging Mudhorn even when you had to reason to do so. You easily could’ve let the cut on his arm fester, let the rampaging creature take out his already spent form.

But…it wouldn’t have been easy, he knows now. How you cared for those around you: from friendly vendors to women you seemed to see yourself in, to children who are simply hungry and have no choice but to steal, to ad’ika in bounds and waves, to him. The constant swivel of your head while out in crowds and among people, sousing out threats and people who may be on the lookout for you. The swiftness with which you turn into a fighter when threatened and your freedom is at stake.

The thoughts swirled around and around in Din’s mind as the ship traveled toward your home world. The last known location of your mother and potentially holding clues as to who she struck a deal with. The now dead bounty hunter not having gotten a name, only concerned with the exchange of credits for your capture. No questions, no concerns. The quarry’s capture the only thing that mattered. The man had taken the job and completed it. Had died as a result of it.

Din had been like that too, not that long ago.

Could have easily been the one being imprisoned while someone who cared about a quarry sought answers and revenge. But he was the one realizing how fragile things where, had been since taking two fobs from Karga and altering the very meaning of his life.

Something about the wide, beseeching eyes of the child had activated his heart. Opened it up and made room for the small being to fit into. The uncertainty he had sensed from the child once its eyes had looked into his own, spurring a sense of concern from the armored man over its life well beyond the need to deliver it to the client healthy and alive.

“She asked for something, for a…kiss.”

“But…your helmet.” Cara weakly argued, knowing how strongly he adhered to his Creed. Not even removing it in the face of grave injury and offered aid. Not even removing it in the threat of death.

“I know,” His words were carried on a heavy sigh. He sat heavily in the seat beside her, the hull holding a small set up for longer travels. Ad’ika crawled from her lap and over the table, situating himself in Din’s arms, claws reaching for the helmet to try and sooth the man. “She- she called me ‘jatne vod’ before she fled from the ship.”

The cracking of his voice was not lost through the modulator.

“She must’ve felt so rejected, so unwanted. And I- I just stumbled over my words so badly she ran.”

“She knows you care about her, Din.”

The sound of his name from her lips, so different from when you spoke it, whispered it, breathed it, was too much for him.

“I really messed up, Cara.” He admitted with shaky words.

“We’ll fix it, I’ll help you fix it.”

K’ath was a beautiful planet. All endlessly sprawling ocean, sandy beaches, and small clustered villages.

Simple. Life here was simple. Crops being tended to, the oceans being fished in, no signs of the war other than an abandoned base on the edge of the largest cluster.

Din hadn’t ever wanted to enter the planet’s atmosphere, to step foot on the sandy land. It was a place that held painful memories for you, the crumbling of a life you had been hopeful to return to in the wake of losing everything that ever meant anything to you. A hopeful refuge after a life of hardships, but it had only provided you with more. The stripping of your freedom and the control over your own body.

It was simple enough to find your home, your mother’s home. Asking after the armorer, claiming he was in need of repairs. A Kath woman had been kind enough to try and use her broken Basic to tell them where he could find the store front, but that no one had been tended to it for some time now. That the woman who was known to run it could be approached at her personal residence. That she was kind and could be persuaded to help even though she’d long retired from working.

It was empty, signs of disuse obvious from the outside. Tall reeds of grass sprouting up at the foundation, the windows thick with grime. It was humble, despite the ways in which Din had seen you return from a shop front, a bag heavy with credits in your possession. A skill that you learned from your mother lending you a way to support yourself and indulge in all the things you had to go without for so long.

There was only one transmission on the communication radio set up in the corner that Cara had rushed to once the door had creaked open. Sand was collected in the corners, another sign that no one had occupied the residence for some time now.

“She’s on Maldovan.” Cara shuffled into the bedroom from the main one, aware that the man was focused on something she couldn’t see. He was as still as a statue, peering into the darkness of the doorway in front of him.

The visor allowing him to take in the room you had been held captive in. There was bedding on the ground, no frame for it to sit upon. A chair on the opposite side, close to the door. No windows, no other entrance or exit. A small room that was bathed in darkness lest someone bring a lantern into the room with them.

“I don’t know that planet.” Din admitted, shifting from where he was standing at the doorway of what had been the locked room hidden behind a large wardrobe to look over his shoulder at her. The shifting of it had popped a drawer open, revealing needles and syringes, vials that had been long emptied. All signs that this was truly the home you had been kept in.

“Is that-?”

“Where San was kept locked up, yeah.” He was surging forward, hands reaching for the chains secured to the walls above the bedding and he pulled. Using all the strength he had to rip them from where they were bolted, the wall cracking and splintering as he did so. The heavy chains fell to the floor with a clang, metal that sounded eerily familiar as it collapsed on itself. Kneeling down, Din reached for one of them, the cuff in his hand heavy and he sucked in a breath as he realized why such a simple contraption had been able to hold you: the chains were made of pure beskar.

Far too heavy for your drug addled body to fight against.

Programmed to shock you should you move too much, the sensors lining the inside of the cuffs telling him as much. With a shout he tore the second, lower set of chains from the wall, throwing them across the room in his rage.

The image of you shackled to the wall of this dark room, consumed with thoughts of ending your life kept him on his knees, forced his arms to support him as he crumpled to the ground completely. His modulator crackling with the heavy breaths.

Surging up, he activated bright flames to flow from his vambrace. Intent on tearing down the entire house to the last stud and beam. Cara was quick to retreat back outside, letting the man do what he felt was necessary. She stood behind him as he made his way outside, the structure entirely lit up and beginning to collapse in on itself.

Dark smoke whipped around in the breeze coming off of the nearby shoreline, doing nothing to quell the licking flames. Cara was doing her best to sooth an equally agitated child in the bad slung across her shoulders. Though she knew it would take time for them both to come back from seeing the evidence of your heavy past.

They watched as it turned from burning wood, the outer stone walls crumbling from the heat that had been trapped inside, to a pile of rubble and ash.

He knew it was against the Creed, that it was a sin to leave behind something of his people. But the beskar that had contained you glowed hot amongst the ash, left behind as he walked away from the plot of land and back to the ship.

“The holonet has little information on Maldovan. Citing that it’s a desert planet with white sands, crystalline oceans that bring in a lot of visitors.” Din announced as he exited the control room, the ship constructed of only that and one other room off the hold space. One level, but enough for them to be comfortable traveling. Cara had tried to get Din to retire to the room once they returned to the ship and left K’ath behind, but he had insisted he was fine. Though the door to the cockpit had been closed and locked for hours now, well into the trip since the ship had been jumped into hyperspace.

“And their walled city.” Cara added, as she brought up a hologram of the planet to life from her cuff. She had reached out to Karga, asking him for any aid he had to provide them on the place they were traveling to.

“Yes… and if her mother knows about you then it will be hard to make a plan. Your armor isn’t exactly common and I’m sure she’s told the royal guard to keep an eye out for you.”

“Haran.” He cursed, knowing Cara’s words were true.

Shit.

It was entirely possible, and he wouldn’t put it past the woman he personally knew nothing about, going off of the words of her that you had shared with him. But surely the only city on the planet wouldn’t go out of their way to screen the many tourists that sought out the picturesque world.

Time seemed to be moving slowly and far too fast all at the same time. Thoughts continued to consume Din, all the possibilities of what could occur, what had already occurred making him feel like he was a child once again who knew nothing of the world or how it worked. The ship’s system beeping before it shifted smoothly from traveling through hyperspace and back to sublight settings.

The planet in view was covered in vast expanses of white sand and bright blue. An ocean planet as much as a desert one. It was small, a moon to a larger planet visible in the sky even within the atmosphere as the ship descended. The only city was surrounded by a large wall, protection from the two outcroppings that looked to be a racetrack and the well-established tourist destination on either side.

Maldovan was known as a resort destination, an entire smaller sector off set from the main city. The sector looked to be abundant with hotels, spas, shopping, anything and everything to keep individuals occupied and a steady supply of credits flowing into the local economy.

Cara had suggested she be the one to guide the ship through the planet’s atmosphere, handle the communication with the intake group, and land the smaller ship into the hangar. She suggested he stay behind on the ship while she registered the ship, paying the station fee for several days. And when she returned, there was a frown on her face and a worried furrow to her brow.

The woman was frustrated, that much was obvious. Din merely watched her as she closed the ramp, turning to him and explaining what information she had gathered during the short interaction.

There were two glaringly obvious problems:

Everyone wore light, flowing coverings and outfits in order to gain access into the main part of the city.

And there were wanted posters depicting Din’s armored form.

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dividers: by the lovely @cafekitsune

taglist: @clevergirl74 @strawberri-blonde @js-favnanadoongi @littlemisspascal @moonknight-s-cumdump @bookloverkat @golden-mando @beskarandblasters @feral-ferrule @bearsbeetsbeskar @76bookworm76 @anoverwhelmingdin @sarap-77 @picassopedro @sawymredfox @jessthebaker @genetics4life @mosssbawls

[luvfy0dor]

Henlo

The dad Fyodor anon

Descending from the sky with a request on this fine…. Well it’s night technically but

Ok you get it

You said you write modern AU’s

I have a few in my brain but rn I’m gonna go with the clearest one

You know the kind of stuff I always request

How about Dazai modern au as a young father?

Just him being young (maybe like early 20’s or 19 or something but young, you can pick) and he has a partner. But his partner had become pregnant unexpectedly. And after a really rough and confusing 6 or 7 months, they eventually settle on staying together and his partner wanting to see the pregnancy through (tho they don’t know if they’re gonna keep the child)

Tho ultimately, when the child is born, and Dazai gets to actually hold them, it’s different. And they do decide to keep the child

So basically that happening and Dazai trying to get his life on track so he’s not an absolutely awful father

You can choose if the port mafia is still a thing in this or not if you want more drama

And if Dazai is trying to either get out or work more to be more responsible

And if he turns to Oda for help. And if he was originally considering asking Oda to raise the child because he’s afraid he couldn’t

Essentially just young dad Dazai trying his best

Btw if you’re interested in other kinds of AU requests just lemme know. And maybe I got some Fyodor ones in my brain….. 👀

Happy late holidays friend

“We are Young and We Don't Care ♡⁠˖” - Dad!Dazai x GN!Reader ੈ✩‧₊˚

Warnings; Minimally proofread, Modern AU, reader is afab but gender neutral

Description; Dazai accidentally knocked up his partner, and even hours before the kid is born it's still a mystery whether or not him and his partner will keep it. But things can change, even within seconds.

A/n; Welcome back!!! This ask is cute, I hope I did it justice! Also feel free to drop the new Fyodor ideas ASAP please and thank you 😞🙏💯 Happy late holidays!!

★ Dazais immediate first thought would be to hand over the child to Oda, unsure of his fatherly abilities

★ The reality of fatherhood actually hits him when he holds the baby for the first time and he sobs.

ೃ⁀➷

D/n - Daughters Name

Dazai sat at the bar, swirling the liquid in his glass around. Oda sat next to him, fidgeting with a scrap of paper he found in his pocket earlier that day. "So, what'd you wanna talk about?" He asks Dazai with a cocked eyebrow. "Don't tell me you're runnin' from responsibility again." Oda says, only half serious. Dazai sighs and chuckles quietly, turning to look at Oda. "You know me really well. My partner is pregnant, and I wanted to know if you could..." He trails off at the end, feeling a bit of guilt weighing on his heart. "Take it?" Oda finishes Dazais sentence, being met with a nod from the brunette man. "Yeah. I don't think that I'm ready to be a father, and I'm not leaving my partner, that would be shitty." His gaze wanders towards the windows, the sills covered in a thin veil of glistening snow while flakes fall from the clouds overhead.

"And why is that?" Oda turns his body to face his companion better while resting his head against his fist. "C'mon, you know I'm just not father material. I don't know how to take care of a kid, nor do I know how to bond with it." He tells. His right hand rests on his knee while the other grasps the short whiskey glass by the rim, the orange light from the candles cascading an incandescent glow onto his skin. His cheeks and nose are still slightly red from being exposed to the cold, winter chill of the dark city even though he had gotten inside five minutes ago. "You just sound unwilling to learn, if you ask me." Oda replies. His hand moves from his cheek to run his fingers through his shirt, ginger hair while his statement makes Dazai reflect for a moment. "I don't think I'm able to learn." Oda shakes his head immediately. "You're always able to learn. You just don't want to. I can teach you how to take care of a child, even if you'd still rather hand it over to me." He says, his stubble slightly pricking the back of his hand before he takes a sip of his drink. Dazai sighs with his shoulders slumped, but he eventually nods in agreement. His stubborn personality has a tendency to soften whenever it came to Oda.

Oda started giving Dazai lessons whenever he was able to on how to deal with children, especially newborns. He taught Dazai how to how to hold them correctly and how to swaddle them, amongst many other essential skills for having a child. It took Dazai a couple hundred tries to get the swaddling down, but he was a natural at the multi-tasking part. He could carry around one of Oda's kids in one arm and make a bottle with the other without problem. He was also pretty good with making children laugh, even without trying. Oda taught him how to bathe and change a newborn and told him when the child could have things other than formula or breast milk. He was doing a real good job at shaping Dazai up into a, at the very least, prepared father. Although with these acquired skills, he still had his doubts and second thoughts.

Even as he's sitting in the hospital room with you and all the medical staff, his stomach continues to turn with indecision. He's stuck in a daydream, to keep the child or not to keep the child, that was his only question in the moment. He was so far gone that he barely registered the sound of cries coming from the newborn, but when he did he immediately snapped back into reality. His eyes darted around the room looking for the baby until they landed on her, laying on your chest. Your smile was contagious and Dazai couldn't help but unexpectedly choke up at the sight of the baby. The way you softly shushed her and pet her head made his heart swell. He immediately stood up and reached over to caress her as well, biting back his tears of happiness. He didn't understand how something he considered giving away made him feel this way, so happy.

When the nurses took the baby for the physical assessment, he frowned and reached for your hand. "We're keeping her, I don't want to give her way." Dazai says to you, kissing your forehead. "You did so good." He mumbles against your skin. You thank him and lean back, exhaustion overcoming you. "Good, I'm happy you want to keep her, too." A small smile makes its way to your face. He returns it and stands with you while you wait for the nurses to bring the little girl back. His hand rests on your shoulder, rubbing circles into your skin with his thumbs. His eyes light up like no other when he sees the nurse bring your baby back and he almost immediately reaches his arms out to pick her up and take her. His breath hitches and he stares at her sleeping form, unaware of the tears in his eyes until one falls down his face and onto d/n's baby blanket. He bites his lip once again, making them all the rosier as he sniffles and leans down to kiss her forehead.

The sight makes your heart flutter; you really did think Dazai would want to give her away, but he clearly changed his mind. An even bigger smile creeps onto your face when you hear him whispering to her, his dark brown bangs falling infront of his face. "I love you so much! I'm so glad to have you here, you're gonna be daddy's little partner in crime, huh?" You couldn't help but giggle with happiness. You knew neither you nor Dazai would be the perfect parents, but he really seemed like he was gonna try his damnedest for you; for your daughter.

[neonghostlights]

Chapter Three: Reflections, A Bench and Boardwalk Lights

A/N: I haven't been feeling very sure about my writing lately. Sorry if this sucks. Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary: Eddie Munson left you behind to chase his dreams before suddenly disappearing. When he shows up 5 years later, will he be able to work his way back into your heart?

Warnings: Discussion of past drug use and addiction, Abandonment, Mention of Heart attack and health issues, Very brief mention of Medication, Cussing, If I missed anything please let me know, 18+ Only Minors DNI

Word Count: 4.5k

Series Masterlist

You would hate to admit the amount of time you stood in front of the mirror. 

It had been several hours since you had spoken to Eddie outside the conference room earlier that day. It had been enough time to have the chance to squeeze in a nap, order some room service to fuel yourself, and to call Wayne to check on him. 

You kept the conversation with Wayne short to not reveal the massive shock that you’ve had since being here. You hung up the phone with guilt heavy on your chest. It felt like you were lying to him by not telling him everything but it was for his sake and yours. You thought it would be best to break the news to him about Eddie when you were with him in Hawkins since you weren’t sure how he would take it. 

You didn’t know if you could handle another scare with Wayne.

By the way the conversation on the phone went, it was impossible to tell if you were able to convince him that nothing was wrong and you were having a good time. You had to remember that Wayne was the man that single handedly raised Eddie and was always able to see through his bullshit. 

You applied some more chapstick to your lips. It felt like you were a teenager again. Getting all dolled up to see your crush for a late night rendezvous. If you had a net, you would trap those pesky butterflies that were fluttering about in your gut. 

You hadn’t brought many casual clothes with you on the trip. Just some jean shorts and a t-shirt just in case you did decide to sneak away to the beach while you were here. You were glad you decided to bring them so you wouldn’t have to go down there and meet him in your professional work clothes. That would have been awkward. 

It was just Eddie afterall, the guy who had taken care of you during a violent bout of food poisoning from the restaurant he took you to for your one year anniversary all those years ago. 

If you two weren’t already close after one year, then that surely took care of it. 

Despite the butterflies, you had mentally gone back and forth the whole time you got ready on if you wanted to actually go down to meet Eddie or not. Part of you thought that maybe you didn’t want to hear what he had to say, afraid that it would ruin the vision of Eddie that you had held onto for so many years. Would what you learned tonight destroy all of the sweet memories you two had shared? Prior to the break up things had gone so well. Yeah, Eddie was immature and flighty at times but he always made it up to you in his charming way.  There was no doubt in your mind that you had loved him despite everything. 

You wondered if the years and distance had given your mind a better version of Eddie than he actually was. 

A part of you raged at the thought of leaving this hotel tomorrow morning without giving him a piece of your mind.

You hated having to wonder this, but would he really care if you told him how much he affected Wayne’s health? 

The old Eddie you knew would care. He would be horrified to hear what had happened. In reality though, you didn’t know this new Eddie at all. 

Who was he now? You didn’t see a ring on his finger down at the restaurant but that doesn’t mean you didn’t miss it. Was he married now? Did he have kids? A family? A lot can happen in five years as you were well aware. 

Did he create a whole new life while you were mourning him? 

The reminder that he is now a stranger wearing a familiar face made you decide that you would not go down to talk to him. 

It was after nine o’clock by the time you changed your mind. Again. 

You were running fifteen minutes late and it had taken a lot of back and forth to talk yourself  into leaving the room.

The sandals on your feet echoed against the polished floor as you speed walked to the elevator. What if you had wasted so much time upstairs arguing with your reflection in the hotel mirror that you had missed your one and only chance at answers?

You pushed the lobby button to the elevator repeatedly once you made it inside, hoping that would make it move faster. The elevator jolted as it caught up to your button pushing, making your stomach flip as it descended. 

You practically ran out of the automatic doors when it dinged to let you know you reached the lobby. The poor traction on your shoes caused your feet to go sliding for a moment before regaining your footing and speed walking into the vast room.

The polished man working behind the reception desk gave you a strange look. You gave him one back. This might be a fancy hotel with a lot of business people, but this town was also a beach destination in California. You standing in the lobby clutching your chest and panting definitely wasn’t the weirdest thing he had ever seen. 

The enormous lobby was practically empty except for a few wandering people either coming in or leaving. Your eyes darted back and forth, hoping that Eddie hadn’t left because you were late. 

Finally, you spotted a pair of denim clad legs sticking out from the side of a chair across the room. You shuffled forward, wiping your hands on your shirt to combat the clamminess.

“Eddie?” You asked with a shaky voice, still breathless from your rushing. 

He whipped his head around in the high back chair, trying to get a good look at you. Once he confirmed it was you, he stood quickly. 

“Hey,” he greeted you. He was dressed the same as when you had seen him earlier in the day. It was funny how he looked good dressed up in his waiter uniform but also dressed down like this. The younger version of you, the one that you had been fighting all evening, felt their heart skip a beat. 

“Hey. Sorry I’m late.”

“Yeah. No problem,” he said as he fiddled with the rings on his hands, the same ones from five years ago. “There’s a spot we can go to talk if you want?” He asked as he eyed a few men in suits that walked through the lobby past you. 

“Close by?” You trusted Eddie enough to know he wouldn’t allow you to be harmed, but you weren’t sure about running around the streets at night in a strange city. 

“Yeah, right down the street.” He must have noticed your wariness because then he said, “If that’s okay with you? We can stay here if you want.” 

“No. It’s fine. We can go. Lead the way,” you gestured your arms in front of you, prompting him to show you where to go. 

And with that, you let Eddie lead you out of the hotel. 

The walk to wherever you were going was silent besides the sound of people around you and honking car horns. 

The hotel was located in a busy beach district. You think that’s how these conferences get so many people to come, by promising them a relaxing day at the beach but instead you spend most of your time locked in a meeting room. 

The closer you got to the beach, you could see the pier ablaze with activity. A ferris wheel spun around with bright flashing lights and the smell of popcorn and fried food permeated the air making your mouth water. 

You thought at first that maybe that was where Eddie was taking you to, but instead of ending up on the pier he took you down to the right where a bench sat on the boardwalk. 

The site of the attractions on the pier  made you think of the time you and Eddie had gone to the annual Hawkins carnival. He was so funny then, so lighthearted. Nothing like the quiet anxious stranger that walked tensely beside you. You remember laughing so hard with him that your side would hurt. That night at the fair, he had kissed you when the ferris wheel reached the top. It wasn’t the first kiss you two had shared, but it was the sweetest, the taste of cotton candy and young love melting on both of your tongues. 

You let out a sigh at the thought. Life used to be so simple. Love used to be a hopeful concept to you. Now, you were ashamed to admit you were bitter. You hadn’t been on a real date in forever. Besides the occasional fling, most of your nights were spent with either Lissa or your cat. 

It was dark out, but people still busied around. A few coming and going from the pier while others were on night time walks that were well illuminated by the boardwalk lights.

The ocean was too dark to get a good look at, but you could see the sand glittering like little stars, reflecting the lights around them. You could hear the waves crashing loudly, battling the noises of the tourists around it. 

Eddie sat beside you on the bench, silent for a moment before speaking. “I should have brought you here during the day. I remember back then you always wanted to see the ocean. I didn’t know if you had the chance to go yet or not…” He trailed off. 

“Nope. This is my first time,” you admitted. 

“Sorry,” he apologized. You wanted to ask what for, but you weren’t sure even he knew the reason. “Figured you would’ve come out here with your boyfriend earlier.” 

You rolled your eyes and shook your head. Of course he had to bring up Vance. Vance that you were sure was knocking on your hotel room door by now since you told him you were going to bed early and definitely not going out to meet a certain pretty, long haired waiter. You weren’t shocked when Vance admitted he heard the conversation between you and Eddie when he asked you to meet earlier. After some persuading, Vance had gone out with your boss and a few other coworkers for dinner and he was probably back at the hotel by now. 

Eddie caught on to your eye roll. “What?”

“You haven’t seen me in five years and you're more worried about my boyfriend than me,” you said with a shrug. 

“I just didn’t think that guy would be your type.”

Funny because Vance had said the same thing about Eddie back at the restaurant. You wanted to laugh, but you also didn’t want to let Eddie in on the joke. 

“I guess you don’t know my type anymore, Eddie,” you replied. 

He winced. “Yeah, guess you’re right. How have you been though?”

This time you did let out a laugh. “Cut the bullshit pleasantries, Eddie. Where the hell have you been? We all thought you were dead.”

Eddie took a deep breath of the saltwater air. “It’s a long story.”

“I think we have some time,” you said, not mentioning that you had a morning flight and actually didn’t have that much time. But if you rushed him, he might not give you the whole story. If it came down to it then you would just have to sleep on the airplane. 

“Right, well. You remember when I left Hawkins to come out here to California because that lady at The Hideout promised she could help us make it big?”

You nodded, bitterness brewing in your veins. When he had mentioned her when he was breaking up with you, he had said she promised them the world. Over the years, you wondered if he followed her for more than that. You wondered if there had been something else going on between them when he left. 

“Yeah. That was bullshit,” he started, pulling you out of your thoughts. “We came out to LA and it was okay for a couple of months. Me and the rest of the band were all crashing together and it was a lot of fun. Until we realized that she had stolen our money and took off. The guys headed back to Hawkins after that,” he explained. 

“Wayne called me when that happened. Right before I left school for winter break. He told me all the guys came back to Hawkins because they got scammed but you didn't come with them and it had been a few months without you,” you informed him. 

“I was going to come back with them at first but then I realized how much of a disappointment I would be if I did. I figured I could stay out here for just a few months longer and give it a shot on my own. But that didn’t work out..” he trailed off. 

“Why didn’t you call and tell anyone that? You could have at least written a damn letter. Like I just said, we thought you were dead,” you said harshly. His excuses weren’t good enough for you. 

“The plan always was to make it big and come back and get you. I need you to know I really planned on coming back for you. To me it wasn’t a break up, I just needed to focus on making all of our lives better. I watched Wayne struggle with bills all of the time and you were so damn responsible for the both of us. I didn’t want to hold you back anymore and that’s exactly what would have kept happening if I stayed. It wasn’t fair to either of you for me to sit around and do nothing anymore. It had been on my mind a lot at that time so when we got the offer I jumped on it. I thought I would get all this money and I could prove to you and Wayne that I wasn’t stupid after all,” he let out a dry laugh that told you what he was thinking wasn’t funny at all. “When it became pretty obvious I wasn’t getting anywhere and I was about to call it quits and come home, I got mixed up with a bad crowd in LA.”

You wanted to tell him that he was never stupid. He was creative, smart, and wonderful. But your mind couldn’t get past what he meant by getting in with a bad crowd. 

“How bad of a crowd?”

“Drugs,” he admitted after a brief silence, searching your face to see your reaction. 

Your heart sunk all the way to your gut while your blood chilled. You couldn’t tell if it was the ocean breeze causing you to shiver or the heaviness of what he was telling you. Eddie noticed your goosebumps and stripped off his leather jacket, handing it over for you to slip on. You didn’t fight him on it. The warmth felt so good surrounding you when you put it on. 

Eddie had dealt drugs back in Hawkins but that was just weed. He never messed with anything else. 

“What kind of drugs?” you asked, your voice shaking from your shock. 

“I don’t really want to get into that. They aren’t important any more.” 

You nodded, allowing him to start talking again. He seemed okay now but if it was that bad for him that he couldn’t come home, then what all did he go through out here?

“I’m clean now,” he said quickly. He must’ve seen where your thoughts were going. 

“I’m proud of you. And I’m so sorry you went through that. I just want you to know neither me or Wayne thought you were a disappointment. We just wanted you to come back.” And you meant it. Eddie looked at you like he didn’t believe it but then you saw it, the hint of sadness in his eyes. You wondered how long it had been since someone told him they were proud of him.

“It was bad for a few years. I didn’t realize how bad it was until one day I saw this damn ladybug.” 

“A ladybug?” You asked, not following what he was talking about. 

“Remember that one time we were sitting out on the picnic tables by the trailer?  You were trying to get me to study for some test. And I told you it didn’t matter because I was going to fail anyways? Well right after I said that, a ladybug landed on my nose. I tried to squash it but you yelled at me and told me it was supposed to mean goodluck.”

You nodded, vaguely remembering that day. It was funny seeing Eddie flailing from a harmless little bug. 

“I saw a ladybug and it made me think of you,” he admitted sheepishly. “I remembered what you said and I took it as a sign. I guess it kind of brought me back to reality a bit. After that, my buddy I had met when I first got here helped me get clean, get a job, and basically that’s what I’ve been doing since,” he explained like it was that simple. It was not that simple. 

“How long have you been clean?” You asked, scared to know the answer. 

“A little bit over a year,” he admitted. “I’ve been working at the hotel restaurant ever since.”

You weren’t sure what to say. You were angry that Eddie had gone through that, but also so proud that he made it out. 

Eddie took your speechlessness as a sign to keep going. “I still didn’t call after that because I didn’t want you or Wayne to know what I did and what I got into. I figured you would think that I just started over out here. I didn’t want you to think I was dead, but I also didn’t want to admit how much of a god damn failure I am. And I remembered how mad you were at me and how much I hurt you and I thought that you would just be better off without me in your life at all. ”

“You are not a failure.” You shook your head forcefully. “When you didn’t come back I blamed myself. I am so mad at you still, Eddie. I would’ve come down here in a heartbeat and helped you.”

Guilt pounded at you. There were times you had been hard on Eddie to get his shit together. You didn’t realize you were hurting him instead of helping him. 

You couldn’t help but feel like this was all your fault. 

Eddie sighed, leaning his head back and looking at the sky before he shook his head at your words. “I know you would have but you didn’t need to see me like that. You still have every right to be mad at me though.”

“I know.” You sighed. 

Eddie smiled at your answer. “I couldn’t believe it when I saw you at that table. I couldn’t believe that you were here. After all this time going back and forth on whether or not to go home and you just show up here.” He shook his head in disbelief. “I knew you’d be successful. I mean, what’ve you been up to? What’s your life like now?”

You shook your head, becoming angry again because this whole conversation he hasn’t asked about the one person who is supposed to be the most important to him. “You’re not even going to ask how your uncle is doing?”

Eddie sputtered for a moment. “Do you know how Wayne is doing?”

You looked back at him wide eyed. “What do you mean? Of course I know how Wayne is doing. Who do you think has been taking care of him since you left?”

It was a low blow. And Wayne didn’t exactly need taking care of. But it was still the truth. Eddie left and you stepped up to the plate. 

“What do you mean taking care of him? Is he alright?” Eddie sounded frantic now as he leaned closer to you. 

“He’s fine,” you said calmly. “But he’s got some health issues now.”

“Like?”

You fumbled, not sure how to break the news to Eddie. “About a year and a half after you disappeared, I got a phone call in the middle of the night because Wayne decided he was going to drive out to LA and find you himself without telling anyone. He made it all the way to Colorado before he had a heart attack on the side of the road. It was mild. He’s fine. I get him his medicine once a month. I make sure he goes to all of his doctors appointments. He had to cut back hours at the plant so I help him with his bills even though he fights me on it every time. I even tried to get him to move to Indianapolis to be closer to me just in case but he won’t because he’s afraid if you come back you won’t know where to find him and I just-” The strange look on Eddie’s face made you stop your rambling. 

“You do all of that for him?” His voice was breathy like he couldn’t believe it. 

“Of course I do. I wasn’t just going to abandon him too.”

Eddie nodded sadly as he processed your words, knowing that you weren’t wrong. “Does he know?”

“No. I talked to him earlier to check on him but I couldn’t tell him over the phone. I have to do it gently.”

Eddie dropped his head in his hands from shame.“I don’t know how to thank you for taking care of him when I couldn’t. I’ll make it up to the both of you, I promise. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt more than they already were. He’s really okay though?” He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. You could see the tears shining in his eyes, illuminated from the lights around you. 

“He just needs to take it easy, but you know how he is,” you admitted with a shrug. 

“I really thought he would be okay without me…”

“He is okay. He just misses you, Eddie. Promise me if you make things right with him that you won’t just disappear and break his heart all over again. I don’t think he can take it.” 

You wanted to add that you couldn’t take it if he broke your heart again too. But he didn’t owe you anything. 

“I won’t. I promise I’ll make it right. Seeing you here was the sign I needed. I’ll fix this…” He trailed off looking at you with a thoughtful expression. “Besides taking care of Wayne, tell me about your life now,” he requested. 

So you did. You told him about your job. Your best friend, Lissa, and your cat, Junie, that had the attitude of a teenager. You told him about your apartment in Indianapolis that you might have to give up to move back to Hawkins eventually to be closer to your parents and Wayne. You told him that you were trying to get a promotion at work, hence why you came on this trip anyways. And lastly, you told him that Vance was not your boyfriend. 

“Wait so that asshole that kept touching you last night was not your boyfriend?” He asked incredulously. 

“No. Just a coworker that can’t take a hint.” You shrugged. 

Eddie shook his head, his jaw tensed and hands in fists on his lap. “You want me to talk to him?”

“I have to work with him. You’ll just make it worse. Besides, don’t you have a girlfriend out here or something?” 

Eddie looked at you confused. That question had really come out of nowhere. “Of course I don’t.”

You hated to admit you were surprised but also relieved. “What about that lady that you followed out here? You two never had a thing?” You hated how forced your nonchalance sounded. You knew he could read right through it. 

Eddie let out a laugh. “Baby, no. There was never anything like that. I did tell you she was like sixty years old right?”

Baby. He had called you baby. A jolt traveled through your heart at his words. Did he really mean it when he said it or was it just a cruel slip of the tongue? 

“No,” you admitted slowly. 

Eddie shook his head. “It was just business until she stole from us. Nothing more. I promise.”

You looked down at the ground instead of saying anything else. 

“When do you leave?” He finally asked. 

“I have a flight in the morning,” you said, looking at him to see what he would say. 

“Shit. And it’s getting late. I’ll walk you back,” announced before reluctantly standing, sticking his hand out for you to grab and pull yourself up.

The walk back wasn’t as silent as the walk there. You both moved slowly, neither of you wanting to admit that you didn’t want the night to end. Eddie took his time pointing out which stores were scams and which ones he had funny stories about. He also told you how to get to his apartment from the hotel even though you would never have the chance to go there. You felt like he was telling you just in case. 

 There was something between you and Eddie that you couldn’t deny. It was obvious that five years hadn’t healed you like you thought it would. Especially since you were able to intensely feel all of the emotions you had been locking away by just being near Eddie for a short amount of time. 

You wondered if Eddie could feel it too. The spark in the air that was mixing with the salt water. You were still pissed at the situation but you wanted to understand what he went through. You wanted to be patient with him like you used to be before the world gave you a hard shell. 

Eddie escorted you back up to your hotel room, letting you know he’ll be fine walking back to his apartment alone.  You both paused in front of the room door, neither of you sure what to say next. You stripped off his jacket, handing it back to him even though you wanted to keep it forever. 

You were about to ask him the question, the big ‘now what?’

But before you could, Eddie had pulled you into a bone crushing hug. You were shocked, at first, but found yourself breathing him in and leaning into his embrace. 

“I miss you,” he whispered into the side of your head. His breath blowing over the sensitive skin of your neck gave you chills.

“I miss you too,” you admitted softly. 

He pulled back, taking another look at your face like he was trying to memorize every feature. 

“Do you want to come inside for a little bit?” You asked softly, not ready for the night to end. 

You braced yourself for what he might say.

Your heart fluttered when he said yes. 

[thosehallowedhalls]

three princes walk into a bar

Books: Crimes of Passion, The Royal Romance, Rules of Engagement

Pairing: M!Trystan Thorne, Liam Rys, Leo Rys

Rating: Teen

Word count: 1200+

Summary: Liam has been roped into fixing Trystan's public image. Leo? Leo is just along for the ride.

A/N: This is the seventh chapter of the Round Robin 2024 saga, hosted by @choicesprompts.

Over the rim of his martini glass, Trystan examined the two men watching him. 

"You two trying to get into comedy or something? Three princes walk into a bar?"

"I'm a king," Liam corrected.

"I've had to deal with a lot of bullshit this week, Drakovia," Leo shot back, hunched over his own glass. "Don't test me."

"I'm just trying to understand why the two of you sought me out here, Cordonia One and Two. Aren't you," he pointed at Leo, "one of us degenerates in need of a PR miracle? And you," turning to Liam, "a little busy ruling a country?"

Leo downed his whiskey like a shot of tequila. Appalled, Trystan shook his head. "It ought to be a crime to treat a fine blend like that."

"Believe me, if you'd had the week I had," he glared at Liam, "you'd want to gulp down a good whiskey too." 

"Which brings us to why I'm here," Liam added. "I've been assigned as your partner."

"You're fucking with me. How the hell does a king get roped into playing PR consultant in a reality show?"

"Hypothetically, a king gets a desperate call from an old friend after your original partner quit."

"I see Bertrand is not above a guilt trip. Good for him. But what makes you think I want your help?"

Liam leaned closer. "Let's be honest here, Trystan. Your public image is a mess. At this point, short of solving a murder, I'm your only option."

"I'll take the murder. Got any dead bodies handy?"

"Afraid not. And no offense, but I really don't see you as a detective. You're too scatterbrained for that."

"Ouch." Trystan sipped from his martini. "Enlighten me, then, Coach. How do you plan to make an honest man out of me?"

Liam took Trystan's wrist and pushed it down. "First of all, you put that drink down. According to a cursory Google search, there are barely any pictures of you from the past three years, minimum, where you're not holding a drink."

"You're calling me an alcoholic?"

"Considering I haven't seen you in almost eight years, I have no idea. But you certainly look like one, and that’s what matters."

"Ohh, appearance makes reality. Is that a royal saying? I always thought it was a Queen Viktoria saying." 

"It's a rational person saying. The next step is making you look like you have other thoughts besides who you're going to screw next." He made a face. "Maybe Leo could take some pointers there."

"Hey, you're not my partner, I'm just along for the ride. Besides, may I remind you, I'm happily married."

"I'm aware, and I also know you're faithful to Katie. But if you keep acting like you did before you were married, the public will think it's not a big leap from getting wasted and puking on bushes to cheating on your wife."

Trystan exchanged a commiserating look with Leo. "Was he always like this?"

"Unfortunately."

"Pity."

"Back to you," Liam continued unaffected. “You were exiled almost eight years ago, and it doesn't look like you'll be welcomed back into the fold any time soon. We both know you didn't have anything to do with Countess Juliana's death..."

Trystan drank again. "Do we?" He asked softly. 

"Right. I know you didn't have anything to do with Countess Juliana's death." He jerked a thumb in Leo's direction. "So does he."

"You're a lot of things, Drakovia," Leo agreed. "But a murderer isn't one of them."

"Too bad everyone else disagrees."

"Indeed. But you're still a prince, your actions still reflect on your country, and it's only a matter of time before King Maksim and Queen Viktoria tighten the leash."

Trystan sighed and ran a hand over his jaw. His stubble contributed to the general air of dissipation that enveloped him like a mist.

"If you want to keep your comfortable life," Liam continued. "You'll make sure to go from 'drunken waste of space'..."

"Christ, Rys. Why don't you tell me how you really feel."

"... to 'proper gentleman.'" 

"Proper gentleman? Seriously?"

"He can't help it," Leo put in. "Put a man on a throne long enough, he'll start to sound like an etiquette manual. Then again," he turned to his brother. "I'm not sure you weren't born this way."

"Carry on like this, brother dearest, and I'll make sure your partner swaps places with Olivia. She finished with Carrera early anyway, I'm sure she could fit you in."

Leo grimaced. "As I was saying, Liam makes excellent points."

"Coward." Trystan gestured to the waitress. "Bring me another one, will you, darling?"

Liam pinched the bridge of his nose. "Did anything I said in the past twenty minutes get through?"

"Maybe? I vaguely recall something about proper." He laughed when Liam dropped his head into his hands. "Relax, Your Majesty. I'll be on my best behavior all week."

"By whose standards?"

"There goes my loophole." Trystan sighed. "Look, I couldn't care less about my public image, but I'm not in any rush to face my mother's wrath. Besides, you're quite frankly pitiful right now. Saying no would make me feel like I was kicking a puppy. A sweet, annoying puppy."

Leo slapped a hand on the table. “Thank you! That's what he reminds me of! A thirty plus year old mystery, solved in a single night. Maybe you really should be a detective.”

Liam looked heavenward when Trystan and Leo laughed and clinked glasses. Praying for patience, no doubt. "Not quite what I was going for, but I'll take it."

"So what's the plan, oh wise one? We've already covered my drinking.”

“We’re going over the basics.”

“How to Be a Productive Member of Society 101?”

“Exactly. And as your partner…”

Trystan sighed. “Can we come up with a different word? I don't really do partners.”

“As your mentor…”

“Partner it is.”

“... It's my responsibility to make you look squeaky clean for the cameras.”

Leo groaned. “Liam, no. I'll grant you that he needs to improve his reputation, but squeaky clean won't do. People will start theorizing that he died and was replaced with a clone. Or a very elaborate AI video.”

“You might be right. What do you propose instead?”

“He leans into the role of loveable rogue. He works hard, he plays hard. He's aware of his privilege and doesn't take it for granted.”

Liam turned to face his brother. “That's rather good. Why the hell haven’t you been doing that?”

A shadow passed over Leo’s face, but he grinned. “Wouldn’t you like to know? But you’re not my partner, thank God. So let’s focus on our exiled prince here.”

Trystan blew out a breath. “Look, I’d like to get out of this island sooner rather than later. Can we get this over with?”

“Surprisingly, Leo makes a good point. Too big a change wouldn’t feel authentic. You still need to come across as you, just…”

“An upgraded version?”

“Exactly. So.” He pulled out a leather-bound notebook and a fountain pen. “We begin.”

Three hours later, Trystan had a headache, Liam was inching ever closer to a migraine, and Leo… Well, Leo had his face buried in another drink. But the sense of satisfaction permeated the air.

“There’s hope for you yet, Thorne,” Liam said delightedly. “Two more days or so and you’ll be ready for the cameras.”

“Oh joy.”

“But.” He planted his hands on the table and leaned forward. “If you screw this up, I’ll personally make sure that your next partner isn’t as nice as me.”

Trystan laughed. “Fear not, young Jedi. No offense, but I’m done with partners. Never again.”

[pearlywritings]

Bath is better when shared

synopsis: what is a better way of spending the evening if not taking bath with your lover?

pairing: Diluc x fem!reader, Kaeya x fem!reader

tw: fluff, kinda suggestive in Kaeya’s part

word count: 2k+ in total

a/n: digging up my drafts... these were started in May of 2022, good lord

Diluc

Warmth. Being a Pyro user, Diluc was constantly surrounded by warmth. It seeped through his skin and straight to his bones, or maybe it was the other way? Come to think of it, the other way it actually was. From the beats of his blazing heart the warmth spread through his body and warmed his skin, quite literally making him a walking heater, as those who were close to the winery owner called him.

Then why did it feel like he wasn't only exuding warmth but also consuming it? It didn't make any sense for a man of his character - he always gave and usually refused to receive.

Yet his cheek felt warm, pressed to something soft and smooth. His heart fluttered under something warm - something that didn't belong to him. He felt his hair - scorchingly red - being touched and caressed, who would ever touch the fire?

You did. You softly watched his relaxed expression, long eyelashes on his cheeks, mouth slightly ajar and puffs of breath caressing the skin of your breast. Your palm lay on his broad chest, just over his heart, feeling its steady beating. Your other hand was tangled in his hair; wet strands clinging to your fingers and cascading down his shoulders, trapped between your bodies.

Sleeping Diluc was cute. You wished you could capture this moment somehow, as he completely relaxed around you and gave in to letting you be the one to hold him and not vice versa. His weight, fully draped over your body, wasn't unwelcomed; if anything it grounded you in reality, reminding you that he was real, he was there, with you, alive and well, and was finally resting after days and nights of his never-ending self-imposed duties.

You were happy and cheering to your past self for convincing your lover to get a bigger bath, so you could fit there together effortlessly. Now it was truly paying off, as you could  stretch your legs in any direction not afraid of them getting numb and relax alongside the man who held your heart in his hands. 

But even with the warmth of his body the water was slowly getting colder, and you had to coax the man out of his drowsy state to dry and head to bed.

Diluc’s throat strained with a soft groan when you gently scratched blunt nails over his chest.

“Firefly, we need to get out, it’s getting chilly,” your voice was sweet, yet firm, fingers now tapping on his skin, the other hand releasing the strands of blazing flames. Your lover let words register in his mind, savoring the sound of your voice and the fond name you loved to call him. With another barely audible groan, he turned his head to face the ceiling and cracked both eyes open, squinting and blinking from the light intrusion. However when his sight was back to normal, the first thing he saw were your enchanting eyes. He was spellbound by their beauty, by devotion and love reflected in their depths, corners crinkled in a silent smile.

“Are you back with me?” Fingers gingerly brushed his fringe away and lingered at his cheekbone, sending tiny jolts of electric pleasure through his system.

“I am,” came hoarsely, but he didn’t care, absolutely captivated by your smile, sleepiness still etched in his features.

“How about we get out?” You repeated your suggestion, feet planted on the bottom of the bathtub, aiding you in slightly rearranging your position to straighten up.

With his back pressed to your stomach and his head resting on your chest Diluc had little desire to move, but you were right. Lifting his arms from under the water, he put them on the edges instead and pushed. Your hands instantly reached to his shoulders, kneading tensed muscles and eliciting a pleasured exhale from the redhead.

“I hope you don’t feel too discouraged. I am ready to compensate with cuddles in bed, does it sound good?” His eyes dropped closed, body too comfortable to move, though he managed to nod.

“I’d love to, my flame.”

“And you will not run to your office right after we exit the bathroom and change?”

“Mm, no…”

“Promise?”

“Promise…”

It felt like Diluc had never had a harder time to get up in his life. With bliss infiltrating every single cell of his organism it was a hard task to gather the strength and stand confidently on his two feet. It got easier, when he had to help you by offering an arm to latch onto.

“Thank you, dear,” your lips were so tempting, moving and shaping with every word that left your mouth, and the man found himself unable to divert his gaze.

“Kiss me,” the suddenness caught off guard not only you, but him as well, redwine eyes widening in surprise, while yours narrowed in a teasing manner.

“Oh? Is it going to be my way of thanking you? I sure don’t mind. Now, come here…”

Arms wind around his neck and his firmly gripped at the curves of your hips, bringing you closer, heat radiating off of his body and penetrating you all the way inside. Lips met in a slow, languid kiss and Diluc contently hummed, when you took some initiative. The affectionate action gave him just enough power to step out of the bath, not breaking the lock of lips, and then hoist you up to bring you out as well. A soft squeal of yours was what broke the kiss and plucked at the strings of the man’s soul. How could you be so perfect…

“Come on, let’s get dry before you are reduced to nothing more but a puddle, no way I am dragging you to bed,” your joke was met with a quiet chuckle of his own, as he turned to grab the towels for both of you, following your suggestion.

“Sure, my flame. Was I a bother?”

“Never, Diluc. I enjoyed it as much as you did.”

At that his lips stretched into a small smile. Yeah, he indeed enjoyed it.

Kaeya

Letting out a sigh, Kaeya lowered his head on the edge of the bathtub behind. Today was downright exhausting. Jean busied him with recruits' training on top of his daily patrol and paperwork, which lately was a lot. Archons, where did people manage to find so much trouble to submit so many reports!?

Huffing, the man moved his tense shoulders, water just barely reaching the middle of his chest. It was so warm and welcoming, aching muscles relaxing and skin tingling as if prickled with many many tiny needles. Honestly, he missed the horses, as his two legs had to carry him on throughout the day and sometimes even night.

Elbows resting on the edges of the tub and one knee bent, Kaeya sighed again, fingertips lazily brushing the water surface, eyes closing and a weary expression frozen on his handsome face.

"You sigh so much and so dramatically, which makes me think you are the Anemo Archon and are trying to blow something off," your teasing voice reached his ears and a smile tugged on his thin lips. There you were, his main source of good vibes.

"Is that so?" Turning his head and opening his always uncovered eye he spotted you in the doorway, shoulder supported by a frame, arms loosely crossed over the swell of your, barely covered by a robe, breasts and your pretty eyes watching him softly.

It almost made him forget he was a Cryo user as warmth spread in his chest.

"Oh, don't give me that lovesick look, handsome. You make me think you'll melt any moment," you chuckled, teasing him yet again, achieving a much wider smile of his.

"Can't help it, snowflake, you are too pretty to not look at."

Another hearty chuckle he loved so much. He also loved that glint in your eyes whenever he gave you a compliment, which he tried to do a lot just to see it.

Reaching out a hand, he gently curled his fingers.

"Join me?" 

Not uttering a word, you simply stepped further into the room. Fingers tugged on a knot that kept the sides of the robe closed and you sensually shrugged it off your shoulders. Kaeya's star-shaped eye was full of appreciation, yet his lips couldn't help but curl into a teasing smirk.

"My, I might think you were planning to join me from the very beginning, snowflake."

As material hit the floor, you stepped even closer, leaning down and gripping the edges of the tub.

"Well…" as you leaned in even more your lips hovered impossibly close to his. "What if I did, hm?"

Soft breathes caressed each other and his calloused fingers touched your skin, trailing to your waist, gripping it. A shiver sent by a chilly feeling of his fingertips cut that small almost-nothing that separated you and your lips finally molded together.

It was a dance of cold and hot, one that Kaeya genuinely enjoyed and always looked forward to. The kisses ignited flame in both of your hearts, melting away the bits of his frustration collected during the day in his, and reminding you to comfort your lover in yours.

In the meantime his chilly fingers sent jolts of pleasure through your system, blood rushing to all the sensitive places.

He needed more.

As he was ready to drag you into the water with him you softly tutted and took his hands, drawing them away from your waist.

"Not so fast, handsome," and you straightened up, carefully lowering his hands in the water. "Why don't we make this evening even better? You deserve some pampering."

With a wink you swiftly turned around and made your way to the door. In all your naked glory, hips swaying and surely breasts softly bouncing with each step you took. Just the image of you comfortably walking unclothed in your shared apartment sent delicious shivers down Kaeya's back. You were a beauty worth waiting for and in Kaeya's eyes everything - each perfection and imperfection - was special.

Said eyes softened when you came back with a wine bottle in one hand and two glasses in the other.

"Oh? You decided to spoil me, love?" The sweet nickname left his lips effortlessly, making both of your hearts flutter - yours from the lovely affection and his from understanding how comfortable he was in the relationship with you to speak such a word sincerely.

His palms rested on your knees and then slid higher right to your hips, as you first stepped into the bath and then lowered yourself right into his lap.

A cork made a characteristic 'pop' and soon the dark liquid filled the glasses. The bottle was left on the floor for the time, making a muffled knock sound against the tiles, quickly followed by a clicking sound, echoing off the walls of the bathroom.

"In what honor are we drinking?" Kaeya twisted his wrist, letting the wine swirl within its crystal clear confines. You shrugged your shoulders, hand resting on his chest, the other busy with the glass.

"I don't know. Any ideas?"

The man didn't think for long, eyes fixed on your face and thumb rubbing the skin on your thigh.

"Darling, you are so pretty it hurts," he whispered, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to your collarbone. "And I propose to drink for that. For the beauty of the woman I am lucky to call mine."

The kiss he received after the wine was sipped on intoxicated him much stronger than the alcohol itself. Leaving glasses on the wider edge of the tub, you became tangled in each other's embrace, chests pressed close, fingers in each other's hair and mouth devouring one another. 

Evenings like this were Kaeya's favorite, for they brought great comfort and the sense of domesticity - something he missed a lot in his life. And you, the one who never failed to make him feel that way, ought to be cherished and praised.

Stay assured, you wouldn't leave that bath, and then most likely bed, without being thoroughly satisfied.

[blingblong55]

Eternal Sleep- John Price

F!Reader, loss of a child, stillbirth (I'm not sure if this is the correct term), angst, some fluff

This super short one is dedicated to all those mothers whose babies are in eternal sleep.

Inspired by: Sign Of The Times- Harry Styles

R/N and John, are a happy couple in their early to late 30s. They met when John was a lieutenant. Met each other's parents and decided to not get married simply because they weren’t ready to elevate their relationship to a legal one.  Or that's what John says. In reality, he's afraid of giving in and failing, but he really does love her. They've been together for over 7 years, Some may say it's been the best 7 years of these two love birds' lives, but we’ll leave that up to you. 

And nearly about 8 months ago they found out they were pregnant. John got a promotion as a captain and R/N got a promotion at her office. She's now a manager of a small but important team. They’ve saved up for their baby’s life, it's not much, but it's something! Jolene is now on maternity leave and John in about 3 weeks will be on leave too.

He decided to not get any vacations since the announcement of her pregnancy just so he could save the days for their baby’s arrival, he even works extra hours too.  R/N is now at their baby’s nursery, she's placing everything they might need for when the baby arrives. She holds her stomach and looks at the reflection in the window, She feels the baby kick her belly,

  “Just a little longer my sweet angel” she smiles. John arrives, he leaves his bags at the door and walks upstairs. “How is my pretty girl doing?” He walks behind her and hugs her. She never understood how a girl like her could be with a man like him, but she was lucky nonetheless. “Pretty good for a chilly October” She looks down and watches as the kids go by, running in costumes and candy in their bags.

“Soon our little angel will be running down the streets with a bag of candy,” he says, he walks back to the hallway and turns the heat on, “I don’t want the both of you to get sick darling.” he loudly says as he walks back down the stairs. “Promise we won't!” She answers back and walks downstairs too.

“How was work? Any new drama I can hear about?” she asks, sitting down on the sofa and smiling. He laughs knowing she lives for all the gossip he’s about to give her. “C’mere, my sweet sweet r/n” 

And for the remainder of the evening, he watched her as she gasped, laughed and even added comments to all the gossip he had for her. Once he finished his rant he leaned in and kissed her, Do her lips taste like heaven, pure heaven and I’m the one who gets this glory he thought.

“Marry me, R/N, marry me darling, please” he almost whispered his words. His face got warm. And when he thought she’d say no her smile creeped in and she looked him in the eyes, “The answer is yes, but are you sure? I know you have that issue and-”

“Can I kiss you? and give you this ring?” he furrowed his eyebrows, afraid of her response. “John? You don’t have to ask me silly” She placed her hand on his chest.

“Consent above all my darling”

She nodded her head. 

He was never the one people would think he'd settle down and start a family, but the dates and many days he spent with R/N he slowly and hopelessly fell in love with her. He never thought of another woman. In fact, when another woman would tell him they bought new perfume he’d ask which one they wore because maybe his lady would like the smell of it, anything that he would see or hear about he would immediately think of her and wonder if she'd like it. If she talked about a new makeup, jewelry or any sort of product he would write it down and take her to the stores that weekend. But she always felt bad and would only get one thing, just one. 

-3 weeks later- 

R/N slept on her side and John slept on a chair beside her, patiently waiting for her to get any sort of signal their baby was ready to be delivered. At around 2 a.m. she woke up and he jumped to her side, “You think it's time doll?”She nodded and he ran to the nursery and grabbed the bags they had prepared a few days before tonight, he rushed to the car and back to her, she was already sitting on the bedside. 

The entire way to the hospital he kept checking on her, he held her hand and would often kiss it. 

Once they got there a nurse rushed outside and took her inside in a wheelchair. He waited out in the hallway and paced back and forth. He had promised her he wanted her to feel free when delivering their baby. But curiosity kicked in, and he made his way inside her room. There she was, smiling through the pain. She reached her hand for him to take, and he walked to her side and held her hand in his, “You got this, you’re so strong” he kept whispering in her ear. The nurse gave him a towel so he would dry the sweat off his forehead. When he thought everything was going right he heard alarms going off and more doctors rushing in. They pushed him aside and took her elsewhere.

A nurse told him it was so they could focus on R/N and the baby. He stayed in the room alone. Walking through the room, he called his parents, and they called hers. He cried and even prayed. He hadn’t done that since he was nearly 6 years old. A kid praying for his brother's return now praying for his girl and baby’s life. He remembered all those moments of him and her dancing in the kitchen while they baked some food for Easter and running down streets drunk and messing around.

“I think I love you!” he said as she took her hand and kept running from their friends and she kissed him, and at that moment he knew there was no other girl for him. No one could replace her, she filled up his heart, and memories. To him, she had become his gold memories, the ones he went back to when he felt sad. 

A doctor walked in, his face told what his voice couldn’t say. 

“Doctor?” he walked up to him, “She is fine, you can come in now.” John still had doubts, why didn’t he mention the baby? “And our baby?”

“Looks healthy” 

Once he walked inside of her new room for at least the next day or three, he saw them. He felt all that weight gone from him. A tear threatened to fall down, but he played strong. “Hi handsome” she whispered, her voice sounded weak, like she was sick. But he understood that she went through too much pain to even mention this. “Hey, beautiful” his voice cracked. His hands felt sweaty, but when his eyes laid on his baby all that fear and nervousness left his mind. 

“Is this angel really ours?” a nurse walked back in, ready to poke another needle on the baby’s foot. R/N nodded. “You want to hold it?” He looked at her and nodded, his smile widened. “Please,” he answered. Thankfully her bed was pretty wide and he sat right next to her. She handed her their baby. He was afraid of hurting it, “W-wow, darling….you created this, thank you. Truly thank you. Now I have these two angels with me.” he kissed the baby’s forehead and smiled. “Thank you R/N for making me a father. I respect how strong you are, seriously babe.” 

But tragedy struck. The baby stopped breathing. The nurse rushed to their side and called for backup. She took the baby off his arms and rushed elsewhere. John walked into the hallway. A security guard kept him out there. About ten minutes later a doctor came up to him. A few nurses followed behind. “I’m sorry” he paused and looked down, “we did our best, Your baby fought for every breath left in their little chest, but it wasn’t enough.” 

John took a few steps back and shook his head, the tears now became a river stream. “Please tell me this isn’t true, Our baby can’t be dead, please.” he cried and at moments his voice would give up on him. “Can I see her?” was all he was left to say. “Please, I need to see my r/n” his voice felt weak, almost like a breaking point.

“My baby, where is it? I held it but they took it away, do you have it, John?” His eyes water and his skin shivers, how is he supposed to tell her this news? “Darling, our baby” he inhales and looks at her, Her eyes are filled with joy, but when she takes another look at him it all vanishes. “They did everything they could, they even gave us this.” he hands her a teddy bear, the weight of their baby. R/N held tight and cried. She shook her head and cried for so long that he walked out and into the hallway once more, he cried out there. Holding himself. Holding the pieces of a memory, the memory of a forever sleeping baby.

[yawntutsyip]

₊˚୭ paring: Rotxo x Reader | angst with happy ending in part two

₊˚୭ summary: after Rotxo starts to realize he had feelings for his best friend he gets scared and begins to avoid them thinking it was for the better not knowing that they felt the same and was doing more harm than good.

₊˚୭ authors note: I hope you guys enjoy this! part two will hopefully come soon, it just depends on what my schedule looks like!

masterlist | part one , part two

“Rotxo~ What are you doing here by yourself?!” You called out with a smile and tackled the boy by jumping on his back, he was caught off guard and you both started falling down a small ‘ahh!’ coming out as he got startled. Before you landed on your back he swiftly turned so that he ended up falling first with you on top of him. 

Rotxo looks up to see his one and only best friend. (Y/N). “What are you doing?!” He laughed as he tried sitting up slowly, making sure you didn’t fall. “I’ve been looking all over for you!” You said and finally moved over to sit in front of him. 

“I wanted to show you this underwater cave I found! I went exploring the other night and it was the most beautiful thing ever! Oh I just have to show you Rotxo!” 

The boy couldn’t help but smile as he watched you talk to him, a child-like grin on your face as you eagerly explained to him what the cave had looked like, but if he was being honest he tuned out and started staring at you, noticing things he hadn't noticed before. 

How your hair neatly framed your face, and how your nose was the cutest thing ever, your eyes sparkled like the sun reflecting off the ocean waters. 

The way you used your hands when you talked about something that made you happy, and how a faint dimple would show on your cheeks only when you were smiling, the corners of your eyes creasing. 

Gosh, you were so beautiful…not just the way you looked but how you were such a kind hearted person and always made sure everyone was comfortable, always knowing how to bring up the mood whenever you walked into a room. There was nothing to not like about you.

Your lips looked so soft, he found himself wondering what they would feel like pressed against his-

‘Stop it. She’s your best friend.’ 

“Rotxo? Hello~ is anyone there?” You say while tapping on the boy's head. “What? Sorry…it sounds cool (Y/N)! I can’t wait to see it” Rotxo snapped back into reality and smiled at you. “Good! Now I gotta go help my mother with something but meet me back here by eclipse! See you soon” You tell the boy and give him a kiss on the cheek before getting up and running away. 

Rotxo watches as your figure slowly gets smaller and smaller until you are no longer in sight. His cheeks warm up as he covers the spot where you kissed him with his hand. Why was he blushing? Why did he get butterflies in his stomach when you kissed his cheek! You always do it but why all of a sudden it’s different? What was happening to him?

“Yo Rotxo! Wanna come with us ilu racing?” A voice called out to the boy, he turns around and was greeted by Ao’nung his other best friend, who was standing behind him. “Ayeee what’s got you all flustered for, you alright?” Ao’nung asks with a smirk on his face but was slightly concerned for his friend.

 “Yeah yeah I’m okay, uhm let’s go!” Rotxo replied and sat up. “Race you there!” He shouted and started running, getting a headstart. “Bro that’s not fair!” Ao’nung shouted running after him. 

The sky slowly got darker as the eclipse began, Rotxo stood in the sand letting the water run over his feet as he waited for you to show up. “You’re here! Yay I can’t wait to show you! Let’s go!” You say as you run up to him grabbing his hand in yours and pulling him along with you into the water. 

The boy stared at your intertwined hands as his heart began to thump so loudly he was afraid you would be able to hear it. You call an ilu and hop on creating the bond before looking at Rotxo signaling him to get on. “Oh I’ll call my own ilu (Y/N)-“ he tried to speak but you cut him off. 

“Rotxo! Come on! Just get on, it'll be quicker!” You said patting behind you. “If you say so…” he replied and got on the ilu behind you, his hands landed on his thighs not knowing where to put them. “You’re gonna fall off if you don’t hold on silly” You laugh and grab his hands and place them on your hips “hold on tight!”

Soon you both were off, gliding through the water. It took a bit get there but soon you arrived. You told the ilu to slow down and turned your head to look back at Rotxo. "We are here," you signed to him and hopped off the ilu with Rotxo following shortly as you began to swim into a cave. 

Rotxo stares in awe at the bioluminescent plants lighting up the cave as they swim through, a couple fish swimming past them. After a bit of swimming they finally reach a cave opening and swim up, sounds of heavy breathing echoed as the sound bounced off the cold stone walls. 

You run up and trace your finger across the wall and quickly the cave walls glow, shining enough light to see each other. “Isn’t it pretty Rotxo!” Laughter leaves your mouth as you admire all the plants and small creatures that lived within them. 

“It’s very beautiful (Y/N)” Rotxo said in awe but wasn’t looking at the cave, he was looking at you. You turn back around and run up to him grabbing him by the arm. “Wanna see something even better? It’s gonna blow your mind” You look at him with the biggest grin. 

You loved sharing things with Rotxo, he was your best friend since childhood and you could never find someone better. You two were attached at the hip, always going everywhere with each other, and throughout the years you watched as Rotxo grew from being a shy awkward little boy into a young and handsome, more outgoing man. 

It wasn’t surprising when you realized you had feelings for the boy. You were confused by your feelings but wouldn’t risk ruining such a strong relationship with him so you tucked those feelings deep inside but still couldn’t stop your heart from fluttering every time you saw him. You could only hope that one day you will muster up the courage to confess, but that was for another day.

You led Rotxo deeper into the cave as you guys started crawling upward until you finally reached another cave with a clear open space and a large hole at the top, letting the moonlight in, lighting up the darkness. “Where did you even come across this? it's so amazing!” Rotxo exclaimed, looking at you with wide eyes. “I just went exploring one day and I found a baby ilu and followed it in here and then kept exploring” He laughs to himself, only you would follow a baby ilu into a mysterious cave. 

You walked further into the center and layed down on your back on the moss covered ground staring up at the stars. Watching the stars was one of yours and Rotxo’s favorite things to do together when you guys were younger, you both would sneak out past the eclipse when your families were asleep and lay in the sand staring up at the sky. 

Rotxo soon made his way and laid down next to you on his back, arms behind his head to create a makeshift cushion. You both laid there in a calming silence, basking in one another’s presences. “I miss when we used to do this, but now we have so much chores to do around the village that we never have time” You told Rotxo and turned your head to face him, only to see he was also facing you. “I do too”

Noses nearly touching as there was only a few inches between you guys. Your breath gets caught in your throat as you fight every urge and intrusive thought to just lean in and close the gap. Unbeknownst to you, Rotxo was doing the same. He wanted to kiss you so bad but he was scared. He cherished your friendship too much to ruin it. But it was as if your eyes were luring him in, as if he was under some kind of trace, as he leaned closer, and closer.

Before he could close the gap, Rotxo immediately pulls away and sits up quickly. “Uhm, It’s getting late I think we should start heading back to the village before they start thinking we went missing” You found yourself blushing in embarrassment and thanked Eywa for the cave not being lit up enough so Rotxo couldn't see your face. “Yeah, yeah you're right we should probably go haha..”

Both of you stand up and give each other one last look before walking back to the entrance you came in through. You called the ilu and both of you got on, it stayed quiet for the rest of the ride, it wasn't a calming silence like it usually was but was awkward and filled with tension. 

The whole ride back seemed longer than it was going to, and every second was killing you. As soon as you reached the village Rotxo quickly said goodbye and goodnight before walking straight to his Marui and you walking to yours. 

Both of you went to sleep that night with one thing on your mind. ‘Did I mess things up?’

The next couple days, you come to realize that Rotxo has begun to avoid you. Everytime you called his name he ran in the other direction, away from you. Your heart broke each time as you watched him hide away. It’s not that he wanted to but everytime he saw you he couldn't stop his heart from beating so fast or how his cheeks got warm and how he felt like he had butterflies in his stomach.

 He didn't want to admit what was going on and figured he just needed some alone time to get all his feelings situated. The first day you started noticing him being weird, it was when you had just caught some fish, you were so excited because it was your biggest catch yet, of course being super happy, you wanted to go and show your best friend. You two always showed each other when you caught a big fish.

“Rotxo!” You called out, walking fast with the big fish in your hand but being careful enough not to drop it, before you were able to reach him he turned his back and ran off. But you didn’t think much of it, maybe he just didn’t hear you? You stood there and let out a sigh. ‘Maybe next time’

The second time it happened was when you saw him hanging out with Ao’nung and a couple other boys you didn’t know very well. You decide to go and join them as you were quite bored and just finished your chores for the day. “Hey guys!” You called out to the group of boys and gave them a big wave, smiling. “Hey (Y/N)!” They all called out back to you except for one. 

“Sorry guys, I actually forgot that my grandma asked me to grab her a couple things for her…I uhm gotta go..” Rotxo said while awkwardly scratching the back of his head before running away before you could stand next to him. “Hey Rotxo! Where are you going- Rotxo?” You watched as he ignored your calls and kept walking away. You knew he heard you that time, definitely…we’ll maybe he was in a hurry? Yeah that’s it. 

“Oh…okay bye!” You call out to the boy. “Did something happen between you guys? Your always together but I swear I haven’t seen you guys talk at all this week” Ao’nung asks you with a concerned look on his face. Rotxo was his best friend, yes, but so were you. He could tell that it hurt you when Rotxo ignored you. Lately you didn’t have that signature smile you always wore. The smile you showed was fake, and it was obvious as you couldn’t hide the sadness in your eyes.

“Uhm…no…it’s nothing important haha…anyways~ why don’t we go and race ilus?” You smiled trying to change the subject and ignore the stinging pain in your chest. “Losers gets to take the winner's chores” A boy piped in and dashed to the water with everyone following behind you and Ao’nung being the last. “Hey, you can talk to me if something is going on, you know that right?” He says catching your arm before you could run. You stood still for a second before giving him a half smile and nodding. “Of course now let’s go before were stuck doing everyone’s chores!” 

It’s officially been a whole week since you and Rotxo talked last. You felt lonely, having no one to talk with. Sure you had a couple other friends but they weren’t the same, with Rotxo you could tell him anything and he wouldn’t judge you, you could cry to him about the stupidest things and he wouldn't  make fun of you but hold you and let you cry on his shoulder. You missed your best friend. It was as if a piece was missing from you.

You let Rotxo off the hook, making excuses for him as to why he had been avoiding you but you were tired of this. You were going to confront him, that’s why you were standing in front of his Mauri about to walk in but as you took a step forward your mind began to cloud up with thoughts causing you to second guess if you should really be doing this. Taking in a deep breath you shake the thoughts off. 

As you are about to walk in, you walk face to face with the boy you’ve been looking for. “Rotxo!-“ “(Y/N)?!” Before he could go hide back inside his Marui you grabbed his hand. “Stop! I’m tired of you avoiding me like I’m some sort of deadly disease! What is going on with us? Did I do something? Please Rotxo! I miss you! I miss my best friend” You told him as tears began to pool in your eyes, struggling to hold yourself together. 

‘best friend.’ the words stung as Rotxo repeated them in his head. That’s all he’ll be.

Roxto’s heart broke at the sight, you standing in front of him, holding his arm so desperately as if he was a feather that could blow away any second, eyes shiny with tears that threatened to spill.  “(Y/N)” he said but couldn’t muster out any other words as he held your face in his, wiping tears that slowly slid down your cheeks. 

He wanted to just tell you how much he loved you, more than a friend but he felt disgusted by himself. How could he feel this type away towards his own best friend since childhood, it was wrong. You didn't deserve to have a friend like this and he didn't deserve to be called your best friend.

A couple moments of you two standing there before Rotxo takes a big inhale before letting out a sigh and lets your face go, taking a step back with his head down. “I think it’s best if we stopped being friends.” Your eyes widen at his words. “Rotxo?-“ before you could get any words out he shook his head.

"Why? Did I do anything? I'm sorry if I did Rotxo! I'm sure we can just talk it through- it doesn't have to come to extremes-" You tried explaining to him as tears continued to fall down your cheeks. "You didn't do anything. I just can't be friends with you anymore. I'm sorry." He told you with his own tears falling down as well.

"You can't just end a sixteen year friendship like that Rotxo! You can't just say goodbye- lets sit and talk about this come on" He knew you would stand there all day trying to talk if he let you, but he couldn't let you. He had to end things here before it got worse.

"(Y/N)! I told you to leave! Go home! I don't want to see you again. I don't care about this stupid friendship anymore. I was just friends with you this whole time because you were an outcast and I felt bad!"

Every word that left his mouth was like getting stabbed repeatedly in the chest with a knife, and then having someone shove salt in your wounds. How could he say something like that to you? You don't even recognize him anymore. The feeling of sadness was no longer there but replaced with anger and confusion, and betrayal.

A sorrow filled laugh leaves your mouth as you watch him take off the friendship bracelet and hands it to you after he takes one last look at it. Unbelievable. You grab it from his hand and stare down at the bracelet, your tears start to drop on it, staining the leather with dots of darkness.

"Goodbye (Y/N)." Rotxo says while trying to hide the tears running down his face and quickly walks inside his Marui, shutting the door flap close. You couldn’t move. It was as if you were paralyzed, time stopped, all the air from your lungs sucked right out as if you got hit by a huge wave you weren’t prepared for. “Rotxo?” You whimper out hoping he would come back out and say this was all some silly joke.

Tears fell from your eyes like rain, running down your cheeks past your lips and off your chin. An unbearable pain began to overwhelm you that was coming from your chest after realizing he wasn’t going to come back out. You turn around and begin to walk with your head down, tears falling down on the pathway. dark spots stained the ground.

You couldn't go home, no not like this. You started heading to the one place you knew you'll be left alone. The cave you had shown Rotxo earlier that week. Once you arrived you crawled up to the smaller cave and laid down onthe patch of moss, under the moonlight.

You laid there in your own silence until you looked up and saw the stars twinkling. ‘The stars’ you thought, not a second later tears blurred your vision as faint whimpers fell from your lips that quickly turned into screams of sorrow. It hurt so much. What happened? What went wrong? You gave a quick glance at the bracelet clutched in your fist before hugging it close to your chest as you continued to cry your sadness out while staring up at the stars.

tags: @goddesslilithmoriarty @ash-mcj @atwow69 @itzjustm3 @eywas-heir @gender3nvyy @kenzi-woycehoski @ilovejakesullysdick @definitelynot-here @buckyb4rnes @iikatsukii @jakesully-sbabygirl @fanboyluvr

[ctitan98official]

Anonymous: Don’t know if it’s my mommy issues talking but I would like some Mom!Jill valentine headcanons please 🙏 (love you bae 😘)

I’m glad you requested this, my friend! I just rewatched Death Island and my Jill simping has returned, stronger than ever (I don’t know how that’s even possible). Anyway, I decided to do baby Y/N and Jill because she would be so cute with a little one to take care of T^T Let’s get into it!

“Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit,” Jill murmured. In the dim glow of her bedroom, she sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the pregnancy test in her trembling hands. The positive result had just blinked on the small screen and stared back at her, unwavering. Her heart raced as a mix of surprise and excitement flooded her.

It was almost 3 AM and Jill had finally worked up the courage to take the test after buying it hours ago.

But… To be honest, she didn’t really need the test. She had already been pretty certain she was pregnant. The nausea, the missed periods, the headaches… She knew her body and something was happening to her. Something amazing.

She covered her mouth as tears streamed down her cheeks. She never thought she would be a mama for real. It was a secret fantasy of hers. She always imagined retiring from the B.S.A.A. and starting her own family.

From the very moment she found out about you, she loved you.

As the reality of impending motherhood sank in, Jill’s mind whirred with thoughts of the little life growing within her. She began to imagine tiny fingers and toes, the soft coos of a newborn. She was so ready to hold you.

Months passed, each one a step closer to the day when her world would change forever. Jill embraced the changes in her body, marveling at the miracle unfolding. She talked to you almost constantly. She couldn’t wait to meet you, but she also felt like she already knew you.

The nursery took shape with care, reflecting the anticipation of your arrival. Jill wanted everything to be perfect before you came home.

Eventually, after all her body had gone through, the moment finally arrived when labor pains gripped her. At long last, you entered the world.

Jill’s eyes glistened with tears as she cradled you in her arms for the first time, marveling at the tiny features that mirrored her own. She was a mama finally.

“Hi, Y/N,” She said quietly, smiling as your little hand gripped her finger. “Mama loves you so much, sweetheart,” She told you.

You looked up at her with wide eyes. You had absolutely no idea what she was saying, but you loved the sound of her voice.

Your confused expression made Jill giggle. She leaned in to nuzzle her nose against yours.

From that day forward, Jill’s life revolved around you. When she held you, she discovered a love deeper than she could have imagined. Her, now sleepless, nights were spent bouncing you in her arms and singing to you. While she had never been quite this tired before, she had also never been this happy.

If she’s having trouble getting you to stop crying, she makes up funny dances or songs and isn’t afraid to get goofy. You always end up laughing and Jill cracks up at your reaction (And her less-than-refined dance moves).

Jill’s absolute favorite thing to do is nurse you. The soft, snuffly sounds you make while you eat are so cute. She rocks you and tells you stories from her life as you suckle. Literally no one has better stories than her.

The bond between you two grows more with each feeding (If that’s even possible). She gently pats your back and encourages you to eat. Even when you’re fussy, Jill is able to coax you to latch on. “Eat for mama, baby,” She’ll say. Her gentle voice and smile immediately put you at ease. She’s a natural.

In these tender moments, as she watches you contentedly eating, Jill marvels at the beauty of motherhood. The uncertainty of her parenting abilities has transformed into confidence. She embraced the challenges, finding strength in the love she felt for you.

She was always meant to be your mama and you make her a better person.

Masterlist

[noxtivagus]

mhmmm starlit waltz.... sometimes i find my mind just wandering back to that. lil thing i wrote years back. from time to time. i really want to rewrite it soon before 2022 ends ><

[sagewritings]

Night Fever - Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader

pairing: steve harrington x female reader

synopsis: after escaping vecna’s curse and the terrors of the upside down, nightmares and trauma started taking over your mind and body. hopefully, you and steve’s feelings for each other will be enough to save you.

word count: 2.5k

warnings: mentions of curse, trauma, death threats

request: [anon] hi!! i would love to request (if it interests you) a steve x reader ‘one of them is presumed dead and then is found but is severely tortured/traumatized’ fic! they are my SHIT and i never seen any with steve x reader (usually only eddie x reader). id love it if vecna got a hold of steve or the reader, maybe after the s4 finale, and made them confuse reality with nightmares and all that good angst. i know this is a lot and not everyone likes angst, but i thought id ask!

a/n: hello everyone! it’s been a while since i’ve posted here on my blog (i’m so sorry i got busy with college) but i missed writing fics for steve so here’s one! just a disclaimer, this fic is based on the events from more than a woman and staying alive. i recommend reading them beforehand to fully understand where the reader’s trauma came from but you can still read this on it’s own :)

if you’d like to check out my other works, you can check the pinned post in my blog :>

i hope you’ll like this fic! happy reading!

*＊✿❀○❀✿＊*

  It’s two in the morning.

A thin layer of sweat covered your forehead, your hand on your chest as you tried to control your breathing. It’s been days. Nine days to be exact, and the ninth time you woke up from a night of disturbed sleep.

Frustrated, you threw the blanket away from your body and sat up. Realizing that it was still very much dark outside, you dimly opened the lamp beside your bed and walked yourself towards the bathroom.

For more than a week, every night has been like this. You, wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, go to the bathroom to wash your face, and settle by the window to read or listen to music until the sun rises.

You looked at your reflection in the mirror and saw how drained you look. How could you not, when you’ve spent no longer than two hours of sleeping?

You never told your friends your dilemma, although you didn’t have to because they can see it. Steve, especially.

He noticed the way you grew quiet, staring blankly ahead in class while you mindlessly played with your pen. He saw how you started losing your interest, slowly turning down every hangout invitation from your friends. He didn’t miss the way your shoulder slumped and your mouth frowned either. It wasn’t a look of disappointment. No, it was grief.

Steve felt as if you were vanishing right in front of his eyes, and it scares him that he doesn’t know the reason why. He tried to approach you multiple times, but in every occurrence, you appear startled and scared before dodging the topic.

After splashing your face with cold water, you silently walked back to your bed and laid on your back. You were too awake and scared to go back to sleep, but with fatigue quickly taking over your body, you can only hope for a dreamless night.

===================

You weren’t sure whether your headache was caused by your lack of sleep or the overwhelming amount of voices surrounding you. Both, perhaps.

Your friends managed to get you out of the house an hour ago, inviting you to lunch at a diner. They said that it was time to unwind after the rough events that took place several days ago. And looking around the large booth, your friends occupying every seat at the table, you start to feel comfortable.

Steve sat beside you as he admired your small smile that he hasn’t seen for a while. He leaned closer to your ear and whispered low enough for only you to hear. “Are you alright?”

You kept your smile and nodded. You didn’t speak a lot these days, afraid that once you open your mouth, all of your burdens will spill out. Steve returned a grin and leaned back, glancing at you from time to time while he simultaneously finished his meal.

You and Steve haven’t made it official yet. Although you two are aware of your feelings for each other and it is clear that you are more than friends, your behavior lately has not allowed him to ask you to be his girlfriend.

On your other side, Max also stops to look at you, her eyes becoming soft as she silently observes how tired you looked. Your eyes met, and you tried your best to look as delightful as you can be.

“What?” You asked her softly.

“You look tired,” Max answered honestly. She kept her voice balanced and quiet, careful not to disrupt the conversation that Eleven and Mike are having beside her. “Have you slept?”

“Of course I did.” You replied coolly. “Just not enough.”

“Are you having nightmares?” You were shocked by her question but maintained a straight face, not giving an answer but you realized that she already knows. “It’s okay, I’m having them too.”

You looked at your younger friend sadly. Max has been through a similar experience as you, probably even worse yet here she is, smiling and laughing as if nothing has happened.

“How do you do it? How are you moving on?” You whispered.

“I just… I don’t want to spend my life in fear. The last time I did, I almost died.” She laughed slightly, but there was no hint of humor in her tone. “Just find a reason to move on, Y/n. There might be one that is much closer than you think.”

You didn’t miss the way her eyes shifted to Steve quickly.

Maybe she was right. Maybe you can move on.

===================

You woke up on a cold hard floor.

It took a while before your sight turned clear enough to assess your surroundings. Hardwood floor, light beige walls, a window, and a door in front of you. You realized that you were in your bedroom, only without the furniture and posters that used to make your room lively.

“Dad?” You screamed, pushing yourself up from the floor. You started walking around but your feet felt heavy and slow. “Dad!”

The door bursts open. You were expecting to see the corridor of your house but took a step back when red smoke immediately entered the room. You shielded your eyes and nose as you felt the air inside the room become heavier. You rushed towards the door, but instantly regretted the decision when you recognized the scene before your eyes.

Four pillars, thick dark vines, and a red sky. The last time you were here, you were almost killed.

Upon instinct, you turned around in hopes to go back to the room, only to find the door no longer there. Your breathing became panicked as your mind tried to process whether this is real or not.

“Y/n…”

Your hands felt cold upon hearing the low taunting voice.

No, it couldn’t be.

“Y/n. Did you think you could get away from me easily?”

Despite the loud footsteps that you could hear behind you, you refused to turn around and shut your eyes.

“Oh, that won’t do. I’ll always be here, Y/n. You can’t escape me.” Vecna laughed deviously. Your back was still turned against him, but you can sense his presence becoming closer and closer with each second.

You opened your eyes slightly and shifted your eyes as far as you could without looking at the monster. You hoped for an escape, just like the previous times. There was none.

“Can’t you see? There’s no way out.” He laughed even louder.

“You’re not real.” You said to him, trying to convince yourself as well.

“But I am, and I won’t stop until I have your soul. Your death will be my victory.” Tears pooled in your eyes as his laugh echoed. 

You couldn’t take it and run, unsure of where you’re headed but that was the least of your priority. You needed to find a way out. Fast.

===================

After the quick lunch at the diner with your friends, you immediately went home to calm your pounding head.

Steve, still worried and determined to find out what has been bothering you, decided to stop by your house several hours later. He knocked on the door and was slightly surprised to find your father by the door.

“Hey, Steve!” Your dad greeted him warmly.

Steve Harrington’s charm works for many people, including your father. While he is protective of you as his only daughter, he has already observed how gentle Steve is towards you. Only an ignorant person would not notice how you and Steve admire each other. From the simple glances to the subtle touches, there is no denying that you like each other.

So when your friends came over and told him that you and Steve finally confessed, he smiled approvingly. It’s about time.

“Hi, sir. Is Y/n here?” Steve asked politely.

“Ah, yes. She’s upstairs. You were with her a while ago, yes?”

“Yep. I just want to check on her.” Steve replied.

The smile your father had on his face grew small when he heard Steve’s words, motioning him to step inside the house. “Go ahead. But can I ask you a question, Steve?”

“Sure, sir. Anything.”

“Is she alright? I know my daughter, and I know that these past few days have been tough on her. I just don’t know why. And I won’t force you or her to tell me. I just need to know if she’s fine.”

The sincerity and concern behind your father’s voice moved your friend’s heart. He loved your dad as his own, feeling more connected with him than towards his own father. And so his conscience feels heavy every time he has to lie to him about the supernatural beings that your friend group has been facing. If he knew that his daughter had been cursed, your father would lose his mind and would probably lock you up to keep you safe.

“She’s fine, sir. Don’t worry.” Steve shot him a confident smile, ignoring the twisted feeling in his stomach. How ironic is it that he’s telling your father not to worry when he is restless?

Your dad nodded understandingly and patted Steve on the back.

Steve went up the stairs quietly, eyes scanning through the picture frames hanging by the wall. He knew the pictures all too well after visiting your house countless times.

He arrived in front of your bedroom door shortly and knocked. When you didn’t answer, Steve tried twisting the knob to see if it was locked. It’s not.

He knocked again, this time announcing himself. “Y/n, it’s me, Steve.”

No answer. 

Your dad said you were here, right? Maybe you were inside the bathroom?

Carefully, Steve slowly opened the door and peeked inside. He quickly spotted you on your bed, tucked underneath your weighted blanket with your eyes closed. He walked closer to you and adored how peaceful you looked. 

He smiled softly, wanting to touch your face but afraid to wake you up. Knowing how tired you must have been, it made him happy to see you finally at ease.

If only it lasted.

Steve turned around to leave your room when he heard you whimper. He turned around to face you once more. Your calm aura is now overtaken by scrunched eyebrows and low cries.

“Dad.” He heard you mumble as your face twisted with discomfort.

“Y/n?” Steve tried reaching out to you, confused whether you were awake or not. “It’s Steve.”

Your eyes remained closed as you continued to sob in your sleep, making Steve realize that you were experiencing a nightmare. He softly placed a hand on your cheek, hoping to wake you up but failing. Then his eyes widened in panic when he felt you shake.

“Y/n.” He called your name again, maintaining a calm voice to avoid startling you. “Come on, open your eyes for me.”

He heard you whisper a phrase, but your voice was muffled because of you crying and shaking. Steve rubbed your upper arm soothingly while continuing to call your name.

It wasn’t long until you gasped and opened your eyes, frantically sitting up as if you were trying to catch some air.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re alright.” Steve sat beside you, his right hand going up and down your back while the other held your hand.

Although aware of his presence, you couldn’t look directly at Steve as your mind is still trying to process what you have just seen. It took you a whole minute to calm down, breathing heavily as you wiped the tears away from your face.

“Steve.” You finally acknowledged him, speaking his name softly.

A new wave of tears exited your eyes when you finally felt vulnerable. You cried deeply, the stress and exhaustion from the previous nights suddenly poured out from your body. Steve held you close and stroked your hair while you cried against his shoulder, whispering comforting words while he patiently waited for you to calm down.

Whatever your nightmare was about has absolutely wrecked you.

“H-he’s going to come after me.” You finally spoke after a while, your voice hoarse from crying.

“What?” Steve asked, his fingers brushing away the strands of hair that fell against your face tenderly.

“Vecna. He’s still after me, Steve.” You cried out.

You remembered it all. The grief that you felt after you lost your mother, resulted in you and your father moving to Hawkins. How that grief became the key to Vecna cursing you. You remembered the first time you heard that a student was killed. It didn’t take long before two more followed, and then it was you. Almost you.

The headache and constant worry over yourself and Max. Seeing her rise in the air with her eyes glazed in white. You knew you looked like that too, never forgetting the terrified look that Steve has on his face every time you came back.

Then there was the clock, the bats, the Upside Down. 

You recalled how Eddie was accused of murder and how your group tried to protect him from Jason’s vile friends. You remembered the vines pulling you against the pillar while Vecna’s terrifying figure towered over you. Your heart almost pumping out of your chest as you ran away from him and towards Steve.

“That’s not possible, Y/n. We killed him, remember?” Steve tried to convince you.

“I know that. I want to believe that. But he’s still in my mind.” You explained, starting to feel the weight on your chest lighten a bit after confessing to Steve. “I can’t sleep without seeing him. Sometimes he threatens me, sometimes he threatens my dad. He showed me images of you dead.”

You broke down even more. 

Steve didn’t know what to do. He wanted to comfort you but he can’t do anything else other than hold you. Seeing you in tears as you voice out your fears hurts him, but he knew he had to stay strong.

He knew all that had happened, being beside you throughout everything. He would be lying if he said that none of it affected him. No, it was imprinted on his mind. The images of his friends fighting against those deadly creatures, seeing you and Max floating in the air while he can’t do anything aside from hope. Steve hated every second of it.

Yet he knew that you faced worse. If only he could take away your fear, he would.

He gently shushed you, kissing your forehead while he continuously whispered “I’m here.” You two stayed like that for a while, arms around each other as you released your pain through your tears.

“I’m sorry.” You said to him after a while, pulling away slightly to wipe your tears with your hand.

“Hey, you don’t need to apologize. Don’t ever apologize. You shouldn’t have gone through all those things.” Steve looked directly into your eyes as he gently held your face, determined to make you believe him. “You are strong, Y/n. You inspire me, you inspire Max, all of us look up to you.”

You sniffed, hugging him again while thanking him.

At this point, you weren’t sure whether you’ll be fully healed again. But Steve is right, you are strong because you survived. And Vecna is gone, your friends made sure of that. You didn’t know how long it would take you to move on without fear constantly nagging you. But with Steve holding you close, his relaxed breathing calming your own as he leaned back beside you, you didn’t worry.

Finally, you fell asleep without dreaming.

[wildsupernova]

counting calories.

Summary: Since middle school, you’d been starving yourself in an effort to achieve the same body as all the other girls in your grade. When you start dating Steve, he’s the only one that seems to notice.

based on trauma comfort prompt 13 from the x reader prompts list: “when was the last time you ate?”

pairing: steve harrington x reader

Warnings: mentions of symptoms of eating disorders

Word count: 2.3k

a/n: hi everyone! i know it’s been a while, but i wanted to start trying to get back into writing again. this fic, while inspired by the prompt, pulls from the struggles i faced for a long time with body image and eating issues. what’s described in this fic comes largely from my own experiences with eating disorders, and may not look the same to the struggles of others also suffering. i’ve been lucky enough to have a support system around me to help me recover, but remember that recovery is not linear. to anyone else suffering, things can and will get better, and i know it can be hard, but don’t be afraid to ask for help! i hope this brings you some sort of comfort, and helps you know that people care about your recovery. <3

x reader prompts list | complete masterlist

You were trying. Not very hard, but you were trying. You told yourself that was all that mattered, that you were making some sort of effort, but in all reality you were just trying to make yourself feel better about giving up. The only thing you were trying to do was starve yourself and convince everyone around you, including your reflection, that you weren’t.

Your body image issues started young. Growing up, you didn’t look like the other girls, all sunkissed skin and long legs that they started to show off more the older they got. You didn’t get the middle school growth spurt that made so many other girls need a new bra two cup sizes bigger or a new dress with a longer skirt because their curves couldn’t be contained in their old ones anymore. You didn’t lose the baby fat everybody else seemed to know how to slim down, your face never seeming to look any older than a child. While everyone else around you grew into their bodies, yours never changed. 

You saw how all the other girls drew attention from the boys in your grade. You’d heard plenty of the boys whisper to each other about whose ass looked best in their new jeans, or which girl had the best cleavage in her low cut t-shirt. At the public pool during the summer you watched as the teenage boys go googly eyed at the big chested lifeguard, and you watched silently as your friends garnered the attention of any boy you’d had any interest in. In your mind, the only thing holding back from gaining their attention was your pudgy stomach and lack of curves.

So, around the beginning of eighth grade, you stopped eating as much. Breakfast became nothing more than half a bowl of cereal dumped into the trash or a thin slice of buttered toast, never too many carbs or too much sugar. Lunch was a rarity, something you’d just rather not eat because you couldn’t count the calories. Dinner was shoveled in your mouth in a desperate need to quell the hunger that had been building ever since your missed lunch, guilt and regret taking root every time you cleaned a plate. You were much too scared to try and make yourself throw it all up, instead doing workouts in your room every night in the hope it would burn off the extra calories. 

The cycle continued and never stopped, even when senior year began and you finally grew into the body you’d been vying for since middle school. Despite your body finally catching up to your age, you still saw something different when you looked in the mirror, a mess of extra fat and too many curves. Nothing ever looked right to you, shirts not hanging the right way, pants always too tight, despite being made to fit that way. So you continued your cycle of skipping meals and desperately trying to work off the few calories you did consume, forcing you to struggle with violent migraines and an overwhelming exhaustion.

Dating Steve Harrington didn’t help matters. You attributed his interest in you to your efforts of starving yourself, convinced that your system had finally worked in your favor. After extensive trial and error, your efforts had finally paid off, gaining the attention of the boy you’d been chasing after for months. He was everything you could have asked for; sweeter than any guy you’d ever met, always making time for you even when his schedule was full, calling every night to tell you how much he loved you and how he couldn’t wait to see you again tomorrow. For the first time, you were over the moon with happiness, intending to hold on to the relationship for as long as fate would allow. In your mind, keeping Steve interested in you boiled down to one thing. He’d surely leave if your body wasn’t perfect, so you did what you could in an effort to stay as slim as possible.

You’d been disappointed when you weighed yourself two mornings ago. You’d gained weight since the last time you’d checked, a disappointing step you felt led you in the wrong direction. For the past three days, you hadn’t eaten anything but a couple thin slices of toast and a few granola bars throughout the day, eating only enough for you to be able to stay awake and avoid passing out on your bedroom floor. 

Steve had begun to notice something was off about you. It had been your usual Friday night date night at the diner, but instead of ordering your usual burger and fries, all you’d gotten was a small vanilla milkshake and a caesar salad. The next day, when he’d visited you on his lunch break to bring you lunch at work, he’d pretended not to notice you ball up the other half of your sandwich and throw it in the trash along with your unopened bag of chips. 

It became hard to ignore when you visited him at work to drop off lunch, sandwich and chips stapled inside of a brown paper bag. The bell atop the Family Video door jingled as you pushed it open, skipping across the dingy gray carpet in your beat up and sharpie-vandalized Chuck Taylor’s. Steve flashed you a smile from behind the counter, one you couldn’t quite fully return due to the pounding headache caused by yet another day of granola bars and water.

He leaned over the counter to press a soft kiss to your lips as you handed him the bag, muttering a ‘thank you’ against your skin when his lips trailed to your cheek. You sat cross legged atop the counter as he opened the bag and looked inside, stuffing it under the counter to dig through on his lunch break. 

You sat and talked for what felt like forever, the store empty aside from Robin and the occasional customer that stopped in and decided not to rent anything. Your watch beeped as the clock hit 1:30, signaling your coming shift at the arcade and the end of your conversation with Steve. By now, your head was pounding behind your eyes, as if someone was inside your head with a hundred tiny hammers and chisels. The nausea was beginning to kick in as your stomach swam, trying to digest food it couldn’t find, and your eyes were starting to droop from exhaustion. Hoping to leave the store before Steve noticed, you hopped off the counter a bit too fast, head spinning and causing you to lean your hand against the counter for support. The nausea in your stomach only got worse as did the pounding in your head, knees beginning to buckle under your weight. Steve rushed to your side, placing one of his arms around your waist to steady you. 

“Woah, woah, it’s alright. I’ve got you, I’ve got you.” You looked down towards the ground in an effort to hide your reddening cheeks, embarrassment warming your ears and face. “You alright?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Just stood up too fast, I guess. I have to get going so I’ll see you later okay?” You made a move to rush out of the store, but Steve’s hand around your wrist stopped you, his arm lightly tugging on yours to guide you back towards him.

“When was the last time you ate?” You didn’t fully register the question at first.

“What?”

“When was the last time you ate?” Steve repeated his words, firmer in tone this time, urging you to tell him the truth. The lie slipped off your tongue like it had with your parents and friends, floating into the air before you could pull them back. 

“I ate lunch before I came, I had a sandwich and a-”

“A salad, yeah, you always have a sandwich and a salad. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, everything is always a sandwich and a salad. You need to come up with a better lie if you want to convince me you’re taking care of yourself properly.” “But I am.”

“No, you’re not. I’m not blind, Y/N. Every time I bring you lunch or we go for a picnic, you always toss half of your food back into the bag and throw it away. Whenever we go out to eat at the diner you only ever order that stupid salad that can’t be filling in any way because all it is is lettuce and some caesar dressing. You’re always popping pain killers because you always have a headache, you're always tired, you're always annoyed by the tiniest little thing. I know what happens when you don’t eat. Now be honest with me, when was the last time you ate?”

There was a moment of silence that floated between the two of you, Steve’s eyes staring down at you as if he were begging you to tell him the truth. You opened your mouth and shut it again, unsure of what to say, whether you should be truthful or tell yet another rehearsed lie that he’d likely see right through. Instead of making a choice, you said nothing, shifting on the balls of your feet and ringing your hands together as your eyes counted the stains on the carpet.

“Hey, look at me.” Steve put his hands on either side of your face, tilting your head up to look him in the eyes. “You can talk to me, okay? I want to help you, but you have to be honest with me.”

“I haven’t eaten anything since Monday.” The confession rolled off your tongue like bile, words tasting sour as they left your lips. Steve’s eyes widened, taking a small step back in shock.

“You haven’t eaten anything in three days?” You shook your head. “Why?”

“Steve, I gained three pounds since last week. I was worried that if I ate too much I’d keep gaining more weight and then I’d get fat and then you wouldn’t love me anymore.”

Saying it out loud, it all sounded completely irrational. You were an adult now; you should be worried about college applications and moving out of your house, not how many calories you ate in one day. It all sounded so stupid once you finally admitted it, and the shame began to manifest itself as shaky hands and tears. 

“Who told you that you were going to get fat?” You shrugged, lacking a solid answer. “Sweetheart, gaining three pounds doesn’t mean you’re getting fat, it’s totally normal to gain a little bit of weight here and there.”

“But-”

“No, no buts. If you keep starving yourself like this, you’re gonna make yourself really sick. Even worse than you feel right now.”

“But if I eat too much then…”

“Then what? If you’re worried I won’t love you anymore when you get ‘fat’,” He held his fingers up by his face to make air quotes around the word. “Then you don’t have much going on in that brain of yours because you should know that I’ll love you no matter what you look like.”

“Really?” He laughed as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Yes, of course. It doesn’t matter what you look like or what you weigh. I love you because you’re you, not because you look like some magazine cover model.”

“I guess I always just kind of…assumed.”

“Well, now that your assumption has been proven wrong, will you please start taking care of yourself again?”

You hung your head, another flush of embarrassment tinting your cheeks. 

“I…I can’t. I’ve tried to before but everything always falls back to what I’m used to.”

“Then let me help you, okay? Let's work through this together, starting with you eating a proper meal.” Steve went back behind the counter and pulled out the brown paper lunch bag, setting it on top of the counter and pulling out everything inside.

“Steve, I can’t eat your lunch, what about you?”

“I’ll walk a few blocks to the sandwich shop and get something later. Right now, you need to stop worrying about me and start worrying about yourself.”

Steve sat there and watched as you slowly ate the meal, holding a quiet conversation with you to distract from how hard it was to swallow, or how everything you put in your mouth tasted like it had no flavor. He didn’t let you leave until everything in the bag had been eaten, despite it making you late for your shift, promising to bring you lunch everyday and sit with you if that’s what it took for you to stay on the right track.

He kept his word, bringing you lunch every single day and holding conversation so you didn’t have to think about what it was you were eating. Each day, the food tasted better, and each day, you stopped thinking so much about what it was you were eating. Sure, there were the bad days, but recovery always had the bad days, the days where you would weigh yourself and cry about the result, or the days where you had no appetite and the simple idea of eating made you want to throw up. But Steve held your hand every step of the way, guiding you through the bad days and congratulating you on the good ones. 

Getting yourself back to normal was something you never thought you’d be able to achieve. Turns out, all you had to do was ask for a little bit of help.

[11thsdoctress]

I seen that you been asking for request for writing and I can't get out of my mind the idea of a one shot based of snap out of it by the artic monkeys. Where the doctor (ideally 10th but I don't really mind if you use any other) had a relationship with the reader in the past and they meet before a long time and reader is gonna get married and the doctor try to stop them. Sorry if was too long of request and thank you in advance! ✨

oK SO IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO WRITE THIS,,,, bUT,, I LOVE THE PLOT I WANNA TAKE TIME AND DO IT JUSTICE,, I wanted to stick with the prompt to it's exact originally, but I just went on and branched out tbh,,, I hope I did a decent job (after all I wrote this with one braincell) also,,, I love Ten (and David Tennant in general),, I've been meaning to write something with/about him,, he's sooo adorkable :(( ========================

Just Like Old Times (10th/Tenth Doctor x Reader)

Fandom: Doctor Who

Ship: 10th/Tenth Doctor x Reader

Warnings: n/a Word Count: 2276

It was a fickle feeling, knowing that the both of you had something going on, even though you knew the Doctor for just a few years, it felt like he was a childhood friend for more than a decade or two. 

Now your world was back to its normal, dull, and mundane manners, leaving the TARDIS was the hardest decision you’ve made in your life, but who could blame you? Not even the Doctor could blame you for a time of some normalcy. 

A few years had gone by, you met a man, and suddenly everything happened so quickly, from the first few small dates to outings, to him proposing, to which you said yes, After all, you were in love with him, right? Or the idea that he reminds you of the Doctor? Are you really in love with the man that you call the love of your life? Or was it just an infatuation?

You try to shake your head away from these thoughts since it was the day of the wedding ceremony, it was still really early, the sun barely touching the horizon, and the bridesmaids were still fast asleep, you decided to take a head start in preparing for your big day, you pass by your wedding dress on the mannequin, a nice white gown, with some blue accents to compliment with the dress, you took a moment to try to process the moment, but you went ahead to prepare.

—------

*whirring, buzzes, beep-boops, whoooosh-*

It was one of those nights when the Doctor reminisces about the two of you, he always had a feeling that something was missing every time he woke up, and starts a new adventure, hell, even sometimes see you in his peripheral, only to be his imagination playing with his brain and hearts, 

The moment you walked out of the TARDIS was extremely difficult for the Doctor to move on from, He tried to forget everything for a bit, but it was no use, all he could think about was that it was his fault that you had left him with his time-traveling box, 

He had blamed himself that he had put you at a distance, blamed himself that he knew that he was afraid for you to get closer to him, not only of putting you in danger, but afraid to allow himself to express how much he loves and adores you in all the ways he could imagine.

“Oi! Spaceman, where are you heading off to this time?” Donna had pulled him back to reality as she looked a bit worried before grabbing the keys to her home.

“Oh it’s nothing, just thinking of visiting some old friends.” he put on a smile before saying his goodbyes to Donna and heading back to the TARDIS’ console and sighing,

“Maybe I do need to relax.” he looks at the monitor, and his reflection on the monitor, “Alright, let’s pick this date then.”

*whirring, buzzes, beep-boops, whoooosh-*

The TARDIS had landed on in a sunny morning in London, next to a beautifully decorated garden, the door swung open, The Doctor cheerfully opened the door and looked around the place, he smiled bitterly as he recognized the familiar garden, stepping out and started to empty out his mind from the adventures.

He had wandered off in to the garden, the sights and scents of roses, orchids, and lavenders had filled him, bringing back all the memories of him and you in this very place, the time you had brought him ice cream from your favorite parlor, the time he had read you a book while having a picnic, and the countless times of afternoon to night strolls.

All of these bittersweet memories flooding his head filled his hearts with the familiar flutter and heaviness of the guilt that was lingering with him for a while, it was a momentary bittersweet bliss he felt until he saw a signage,

“Mr. & Mrs. Wellington Wedding Ceremony”

Intrigued and curious, The Doctor went around to sneak in and to look who were the lucky couple. Spotting the groom, he just mumbled to himself, “eh, could’ve been worse.” before trying to find out who was the lucky bride,

The Doctor snooped around more to satisfy his curious brain, as he got to a photo album of the couple, he slightly regretted feeding his curiosity by finding the album to see you in the photos.

He felt that the world around him froze, he didn’t want to believe the thing he was seeing, he looks around him, before running to the back of the venue. His hearts were racing as he was trying to calm down, He wanted to deny that he saw you in those photos, he was trying his very best to get you off of his mind.

He wandered around until he reached the park, little ways down the road, not that far from the wedding, settling on the bench near the river, he was trying to convince himself that you were happy with someone else, but there was a nagging feeling in him that he has to do something. It was truly an internal battle, his mind was now wandering into endless, ‘What if’s’ and hypotheticals, until he was interrupted by a voice he tried to forget and  at the same time, longed to hear,

“Doctor?” 

—------

The wedding was a disaster,

James, your supposed soon to be husband, was delaying the wedding hour by hour, since his business was on the edge of a international deal to make them skyrocket in the stocks. You felt stupid to let him tend to his business instead of pushing through with the wedding, and honestly now it felt like the wedding ceremony was skipped entirely.

You tried to keep yourself together, convincing yourself that it was better for the both of them, since, at least it’s going to help the both of you in the finances in the future, but hell, you couldn’t even live and experience the wedding ceremony itself. There was this feeling that bothered you, and to take a breather, you headed to the back of the venue to calm your nerves, to prevent yourself from snapping at the disaster.

As you slowly inhaled and exhaled, to lower the tension and stress of the situation, there was a figure at the corner of your eye, walking to the bench you once had great memories with a memory, the more you looked and analyzed the figure, you were in disbelief when you saw the familiar brown suit and the messy hair, you had to make sure in what you saw was not a hallucination, you were frozen there, you couldn’t believe it, he was there. The Doctor was there.

You had debated with yourself, thinking on which was going to be your next move, let him be or approach him, 

Taking a gulp, you slowly approached the bench, mustering up all the courage you needed before letting out,

“Doctor?”

It felt that time had stopped, it was surreal for the both of you, for you, you’d never thought that you would say that word or name ever again, 

For him, he’d thought he would never hear that voice calling for him ever again,

He quickly turned around, stumbled a bit as he was trying to come up with something to say, 

“I-It’s been a while, huh?” you look down, “would’ve sent you an invite, but didn’t know how to…” You awkwardly say, just to avoid the the silence,

There was a pause, an unbearing one, before the both of you say at the same time,

“I’m sorry!”

Both of you were surprised on how the apologies came out at the same time,

“I should be the one saying sorry here.” The Doctor went a bit closer as he looked at you, “I was the one that was scared to say anything-” 

“No, I should be the one apologizing since I was the one that walked away on what we could’ve fixed!” You insist as you looked at him, 

“Seems like both of us have things to say sorry for.” He says, trying to make the atmosphere less intimidating,

As it became more comfortable and exchanging jokes and banter, the both of you sat on the bench next to the river, asking questions just to catch up, everything was easy going and breezy,

“Never thought I would land on your wedding day.” he says as he sighs, trying to hide the bitter thoughts that accompany with it,

Never thought I’d see you again after what I did.” You look away, regretting the harshness of the reply,

“Wouldn’t blame you.” There was a while of comfortable silence before the Doctor had to ask the question that was in his mind for a while,

“Do you still love me? Or do you resent me for everything?” He asked as his voice had a hint of sadness and nervousness as he was trying to brace for your answer,

“Doctor, I could never hate or resent you, honestly, for a while, I resented myself for walking out, not doing anything to get to you, or at the least-” you sigh, “said yes to this.” gesturing to the white gown you were wearing, “but I can’t do anything about it, can I?” 

“Then how were you so sure that this type of forever suits you?” He suddenly asked,

“What do you mean?” You looked at him, 

“Well, you’re questioning a major choice that affects your life, why did you say yes to this?” 

You thought about his question, it was something you really had to ponder, realizing alot of things, you met your soon to be husband at your lowest time, and he very much acted like the Doctor,

The more you thought about the reasons, the more you realized that you were still very much in love with the Doctor subconsciously. Slowly by slowly, you were regretting the choices you had made ever since walking out of the TARDIS, 

The Doctor suddenly pulls you in an embrace, noting your habit of spacing out and shaking, as soon as you realized what he was doing, you snapped out of the state of overthinking and calmed down, “I can’t just back out of this, I have to push through with this, I signed up for this, I have to take that…” 

“You can.” 

“No I can’t.”

The Doctor was about to say something, until you heard your soon to be husband calling to you, “Baby, what are you doing with this guy?” He harshly grabs your wrist, causing you to whimper,

“What the hell you think you’re doing? Treating her like that?” The Doctor was not happy with that.

“So? She belongs to me.” He plainly and arrogantly says as he was dragging you away from the Doctor’s comfort,

You could feel the anger piling in the Doctor as he was trying his best not to punch this guy, “I’d be careful if I were you.”

He pushes you in his car, “As if.” He gets in the car and it speeds off, You were hopeless, you were comfortable and honest for once in a while. As the car was speeding off, it was the uncomfortable silence that stressed you out the most, James was about to say something but the driver of the car interrupted, “Is that a flying blue box?”

You looked through the window behind you, seeing the familiar TARDIS, you had hope in you for once,

James notices the flying blue box behind the car as well, “What the hell is that?!” 

The doors of the TARDIS opened as The Doctor was now in sight with his sonic screwdriver in hand, he points it to the car door on your side. Noticing the plan, you were about to jump out of the 120mph car and into the blue box, but you felt a grip on your wrist,

“You’re not going anywhere.” James angrily says, The blue box is now next to the car, matching the speed, 

“Yes I am!” You punched him square in the face,

As he winced in pain, he lets you go, in the window of opportunity, you hurriedly made an effort to grab the Doctor’s arm and jump to the TARDIS, in which you ended up landing on top of him and the doors shutting,

As the TARDIS flew up and into space, both of you took a moment to catch your breaths before both of you broke into laughter,

“I miss this!” you exclaimed as you both sat up,

“I miss you.” He says as his laugh turns into a smile,

You blushed at his sudden confession, not really expecting that he would still feel that way towards you, however, you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t feel the same way.

“I miss you too.” you say as you leaned your forehead against his, a usual thing that the both of you did, The Doctor’s smile grew wider and his hearts beat faster after hearing you say that,

He slowly held your face and leaned in closer for a kiss, and it felt that he was longing for this moment for a while, it lasted for a few minutes before he scooped you up, carrying you bridal style, as if he was the one you married.

“The next time I see you in a wedding gown, I better be the groom.” He says, making the both of you laugh as he carries you towards the TARDIS’ halls towards his bedroom, after all, the two of you needed to rest before going on more adventures, just like old times.

======== author's note: aaaaaaaaaaaaa I hope to write more since I really love doing this, and ofc requests are open, wait for announcements for it hdksjksdjfhkdsj hope ya'll enjoyed this-

[pascaloverx]

Hit The Road

Chapter Eight

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Summary: You are a hunter of supernatural beings who is forced to experience a new reality: being a vampire. The only thing stronger than your thirst for blood is your thirst for revenge.

Author's note: The characters mentioned here were created by Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec, based on the book series of the same name by author L. J. Smith. They don't belong to me. That said, this fanfic will be short. This fanfic may address scenes of violence, inappropriate language and adult content. Minors should not interact with this story. Also some information here is not in the order of the series or the same way it happened in the tv series. I'm changing some things to fit the fanfic story. Hope you like it!

You wake up scared as if you had a nightmare, a soft scream of horror escapes you. You analyze the room you are in, recognizing it as Damon's room. Not seeing him makes you afraid. Did he die while you were fighting to survive? Or maybe you're hallucinating...

"I thought you wouldn't wake up so early. It's strange for a vampire to spend two days unconscious." You hear Stefan's voice as clearly as day. You are extremely happy to see him. Without having much strength, you get up staggering and go to hug Stefan.

"I'm so relieved to be here. I thought I died, I actually thought we both died. Please make sure no one died." You speak with a weak tone in your voice almost like you couldn't find strength to talk.

"No one died Y/N. But you could have died thanks to your stubbornness. If Damon and I hadn't run here and found Caroline with Klaus' blood..." Stefan seems more stressed than usual when he face the reality of your actions. You look at him tenderly and give him a peck on the lips. You want to make it clear that you are grateful for everything and that you are sorry.

"Where is your brother?" You ask, still in Stefan's arms. He seems apprehensive but after a sigh he answers you.

"With Elena, she hasn't left his side since we arrived. After we saved you, Damon finally felt the consequences of the werewolve's torture." Stefan says as he hugs you even tighter. It seems like he knows you're feeling slightly uncomfortable about Elena being with Damon.

"You know that I can't demand any type of monogamous relationship from your brother, right? You don't need to be afraid to tell me that he's with someone." You say trying to stay strong both physically and psychologically. Feelings really are a great weakness.

"You don't need to deceive me, Y/N. I can feel your discomfort from here." Stefan speaks as if you were obvious to him. A puzzle that he has already solved and is used to.

"Now I know why we were in a secret relationship. You're sexy when you think you know something." You say, kissing Stefan right after.

"Sex will not solve our problems. As much as I want to, I don't think it's right for us to do this. Before I thought you were a stranger and now I know that even though I don't remember, I love you." When the words finish coming out of Stefan's mouth, you understand the burden of having returned to the Salvatore's lives.

"I love you too, even if I don't remember it. I would still like to sleep with you today." You speak sincerely looking at Stefan with a needy expression.

Stefan is silent for a while as you reflect on how comfortable you feel with him. Does Stefan know that he is like home to you? Cozy and comfortable, a place you want to belong. You observe him and decide to try to make him stop rationalizing what he is doing.You start by lifting your feet and kissing Stefan's forehead, then kissing his cheeks lightly, kissing near his eyelids. You kiss both sides of the neck softly, as if wanting to show your desire for someone. As soon as you feel Stefan is receptive, you kiss his lips firmly. He returns the kiss, increasing the intensity with which your mouths and his are intertwined.

"Am I interrupting something?" Elena speaks in an extremely serious tone entering Stefan's room. Did she not learn during her life that knocking on the door is the correct thing to do when you're entering someone's else room?

"Yes, you should use good manners and knock on the door before entering. It's okay that you've seen Stefan naked but I could be in a much more compromising situation." You speak being as direct as possible. She had to interrupt her moment with Stefan right when you were almost convincing him to sleep with you.

"Did something happen to Damon?" Stefan says, composing himself, and looking at the two of you.

"He's already much better, I was just going to let him know that I'm going home to take a shower and probably will come back later. Even during Damon's sleep, he kept calling a name. Y/N, to be exact. Maybe you guys should check on him." Elena says a little desapointed, and you somehow understand her. It must be difficult to see that you are no longer the only woman in the lives of the two men she loves. She left quickly after saying that to you and Stefan.

"Let me go see your brother and you can take a shower to calm down. Maybe another time we'll finish what we started here." You say pointing to Stefan's visibly aroused dick. He is embarrassed, but kisses the corner of your mouth. It's almost as if we communicate through looks. Then you head towards Damon's room.

"I heard you need a babysitter until your girlfriend gets back. I hope you don't mind me coming, but after all I'm your wife. I'm supposed to take care of my husband." Do you speak as soon as he enters Damon's room, seeing him half naked trying to find clothes to put on.

"You used to hate it when I called you wife. But I'm fine, don't worry. You should be resting." Damon speaks disinterestedly, as if he doesn't want to talk to you or look at you.

"Did I do something that pissed you off or is there at least a reason why you're avoiding looking at me?" You ask with a little anger on your tone of voice.

"You were irresponsible in putting your life at risk for me. You could have died thanks to your stupidity." Damon speaks completely out of character. You smile without believing the words he is saying.

"If I hadn't choose to go with Stefan, you wouldn't be here, but your ungratefulness is beyond realizing that, right? You question him, looking him in the face. Your fingers are slightly directed close to Damon's bare chest.

"Next time, choose yourself. That's what I would have done." Damon speaks rudely.

"Are you saying you wouldn't try to save me if it could mean your death?" You question, directly getting upset.

"Without even thinking twice." He responds so sharply and directly that you don't even notice when you slap him across the face. There is a limit to how far you can go and Damon has surpassed it. This bastard. It doesn't even take you long to leave the room crying.