#never brought it outside. never even took it out of the drawer.

[bats-and-the-birds]

I am thinking about the batkids and their rooms at the manor.

When Dick was first brought to the manor, Alfred put wooden letters that spelled out his name on the outside of the door to his room. He wanted the boy to feel like he belonged, and denoting the room as his seemed like the best way. At first, they spelled out "Richard", and were painted in red, green, and yellow -- the colors that his parents had worn for their circus act, that didn't have any other meaning yet. Dick pried them off the door and threw them away. He didn't want to accept that this was permanent yet. There were new letters on the door a few days later, blue this time, and spelling out "Dick" instead. Those letters got pried off much the same and shoved in a drawer, and they didn't get put back until a year later. He was too short to put them in the same place, so they ended up crooked, and Alfred found it too endearing to fix.

When he left the manor years later, he considered ripping the letters off the door and throwing them in the foyer on his way out. But he left them, and there they remained, crooked as ever.

Jason got his own letters when it became clear he wasn't going anywhere. He helped Alfred put them up on his bedroom door, standing on a step stool to make sure they got in the right place. His were evenly spaced and neatly aligned, and he refused to tell anyone that he cried over them that night. He'd spent months wondering if he'd ever live up to his predecessor, not just as Robin, but in the family as well. And now he had his own letters, just like Dick's, and they weren't going anywhere.

And they didn't. Even after he died. Bruce and Alfred both considered taking the name down to make walking past that empty room less painful, but in the end, they didn't dare touch the letters, just like they didn't touch anything else in the room. Years later, Jason would sneak into the manor through his old bedroom window and find his school uniforms still hanging in the closet, his textbooks on his desk, an open novel on his nightstand, and, of course, the letters still on the door, more of an epitaph than the one on his actual tombstone.

Tim fought for his name on a bedroom door. It took a while, but he trained, and he learned, and he forced himself into the role that he knew he could fill. Part of him thought that no matter how good and useful he made himself as Robin, he'd never really fill the role that the two before him did. He thought there might not be room for him after Jason's death, but he did it. He was older than the other two when Alfred finally put the letters up on his door, but he did it.

Later, when he left in search of Bruce, he didn't think for a second of taking his name down off his door. He'd earned it.

Damian's name got put up practically as soon as he got to the manor. He didn't think much of having his name on a door. If anything, it irked him a bit, being lumped in with the others, but it would have annoyed him more if he didn't get his own name. For a while, his name on the door, marking it as his from the hallway, was the only reason you could tell it wasn't the guest room that it had previously been. He had no photographs, had arrived with no personal affects.

That changed, eventually. As he gained friends, he also gained photos of them. He put up sketches and watercolor paintings of his animals. A dog bed got put on the floor for Titus. But the letters had been there from the beginning, and he grew to appreciate them eventually. His room, with the name on the door, was safe, and he liked it there.

Cass's letters showed up without much fanfare. They were simply there when she exited her room one day. "Cassandra" in black wooden letters that matched all of her new siblings'. She ran her fingers over them with reverence. She'd never been allowed to leave a mark before. Her life was predicated on being a shadow, but there was her name, in big letters, somewhere where other people could see it.

Steph had a room. She didn't want to admit it, but when she crashed at the manor, it was always in the same room. Her name was put up, and she took it down, and it was put up again, and she took it down again until it became something of a game between her and Alfred. If Steph was staying at the manor and Alfred didn't find a wooden S in a random cupboard, then have to search the house for the rest of her name, then he knew she was in a bad mood, and he usually made her favorite cookies and left them outside of the door with her name still firmly in place.

Duke's letters were waiting for him when he moved in. His name in bright yellow letters that matched his suit already in place. Of course it was, it's tradition at this point, and he's part of the family now. He had bounced around for a while now, and the letters on his door made him feel...calmer. It was a sense of permanence, and one he could learn to enjoy.

Barbara didn't need a room. She had her own room, in her own house, but Alfred still offered to mark out a space for her. She declined. When she did stay over, it was either in the cave or Dick's room, she didn't need her own. Still, that didn't mean her mark wasn't left somewhere. There was a study downstairs with a desk that she sometimes did her homework on as a child if she was staying over for the night. Now, the desk held a computer that was wired into the Batcomputer's network, a photo of her and her father, and, of course, tiny wooden letters affixed to the side that spelled out 'Barbara'.

[feluka]

biggest unsolved mystery in my life is that one day i opened my book drawer to find two identical copies of a book that i'm 100% certain i've only ever owned a single copy of. same edition, exact same condition, and the label says they've been purchased from the same bookstore. i have no idea which one is the one i've alwayd had and which one suddenly appeared, or where it came from.

[moonstruckme]

happy new year lovie!!!! i feel bad for requesting this bc just thinking ab the volume of ur inbox is a little overwhelming and ive gone a bit overboard 😭

but..... bodyguard!james finds out his mum is quite sick right before his shift one day and leaves to take care of her after letting reader know. he has to take the week off and reader is visiting and bringing them their favorite homecooked meals everyday (which she has memorised bc, bless him, james loves to talk abt his mum) and james is LOVEEESTRUCK. she's there, bright and early every morning (with a different bodyguard bc god forbid she leaves the house with no protection right in front of james' own two eyes!!!) with muffins and flowers and bags of food in hand :( james is enamored and so sweet on her!!!!! and reader is obsessing over how vulnerable and emotionally in tune james is at a time like this!!!!! i'm thinking maybe confessions are getting pretty hard to hold back by the end of the week ☹️🩷

thank you! (if you do decide to write this or if you dont for letting me ramble on in your asks x)

Don't feel bad my love! Thank you for requesting :)

cw: sick family member

bodyguard!James x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words

No matter how many times James has visited home throughout his adult life, he always manages to discover something he’s forgotten about living there. Like how particular his mum is about the way the dish towel is folded, or which drawer the scissors are kept in, or the ungodly amount of door-to-door salesmen that come by on a daily basis. 

Lately, he’s being plagued by the last. He recalls them being vaguely annoying when he was younger, but James’ family is currently going through a difficult time that leaves one with somewhat frayed nerves. He very nearly snapped at a particularly tenacious primary school student selling chocolate yesterday. Not one of his finer moments. 

So when the doorbell rings while his mum is trying to sleep down the hall, James has to make an effort to reel his wrath back in before he’s even answered it. 

Funnily enough, any negative emotion completely evaporates when he sees you on the front steps. 

“Hi,” you say, looking apprehensive. 

“Hi,” James echoes. He opens the door the rest of the way, nodding to the fill-in guard you’ve brought with you. “Hey, Singh.”

Singh nods in return. 

“I hope it’s alright that I just came by.” You give him a sheepish sort of smile. “I didn’t even realize I don’t have your phone number until now. You’re always just…there.” 

James laughs, the mood that’s descended over him since getting the call about his mum lifting slightly. “Yeah, I suppose I am. What brings you out, sweetheart?” 

You hoist the bags you’re carrying a bit higher in your arms. “I brought some stuff for you and your mom, if that’s okay.” 

A tiny hand fists around his heart, squeezing pleasantly. “Course it is,” he all but coos. “Come on in. Singh, you alright to stay here and keep watch?” 

Luckily, the other man doesn’t think to remember that James is currently on leave, and so defers to him with a curt nod. James shoots him a smile as you come inside, closing the door behind you. 

“They put Singh on day shift?” he asks, taking one of the bags from you and leading you into the kitchen. “He’s barely finished training.” 

“He seems fine,” you say in your good-natured way. 

“He took you to a location that’s never been reconned without even bringing another guard to post outside.” 

“It’s your mom’s house, Jamie.” The smile is evident in your voice, sweeter even than the smell wafting out of these bags. God, he’s missed you. “I doubt he suspects either of you are going to try and hurt me.” 

“He should be prepared for the possibility,” James says, but he can’t manage to work any menace into his tone even to tease you. You tilt your head at him, mouth curving up to one side like you’re well acquainted with his particular brand of silliness, and he lets his grievances go instantly. “You didn’t have to bring us anything, angel face.” 

You flush a bit at the endearment, directing a soft smile down at his family’s old wooden table (which is great, because now James is in the position of being jealous of a table). “I wanted to do something,” you reply simply. “How’s your mom?” 

“She’s alright.” Not great. Not worse, which is always good. If the only thing he accomplishes in a day is that she doesn’t get worse, James can feel good about that. “She’s sleeping in this morning.” 

“Oh, shit.” Your voice drops to a hush like the breeze blowing through leaves. “I haven’t woken her, have I?” 

James grins. “No, you’re good. She can sleep through anything.” 

You lose a breath. “Right, well I brought some meals to last you a few days,” you say, digging some containers out of the bag. “It can all be heated up whenever you’re ready to eat, and—oh, also some flowers. I know it’s stupid, but I thought they might brighten things up for you two.” James doesn’t think it’s stupid at all, but you go on before he can tell you so. “Can I put these in your freezer? I brought some muffins for this morning too, if you want them.” 

“Yeah,” James says, the word leaving him on a breath. “I mean, yeah to both. Thank you.” He grabs several of the containers as well, showing you to the freezer. You both start cramming them in between things, wherever they’ll fit. He takes note of the food as it goes in, a heady warmth growing in his chest. “Did you make all of this?” 

You hum in brisk affirmation. “I had plenty of time on my hands yesterday. Turns out things are pretty boring without you around.” 

“How’d you know what to make? This is all—these are our favorites.” 

You turn to him, a tenderhearted sort of smile curving your lips. “You talk about your mom a lot, Jamie,” you say. “I know all her favorites by now. And the things she’d make that were your favorites, too.” 

James hadn’t realized he’d spent so much time rambling about his mum. It hurts his chest a bit to think of it now, worse to think that you’d been listening so intently. 

“This is only really enough to get you through a few days,” you go on, oblivious to his yearning, “but I figured I’d come back with more if you’re both alright with it.” You look at him as you pack the last of the food away, your gaze careful. “I don’t want to intrude or anything.” 

“You could never intrude.” James isn’t sure how he gets the words out, his heart ballooning until it’s nearly cutting off his airflow. The cool air breezing onto one side of his face stops, and he realizes you’ve shut the freezer. “This is just…so, so kind of you. I don’t know what to say.” 

“James.” Your voice is soft. Your smile has faded, and now you look at him with an unabashed, steady kindness. “You don’t have to say anything. I can’t stand the thought of you and your mom going through this. I wanted to help, somehow.” One of your shoulders comes up in a sheepish half-shrug. “Even if it’s really small.” 

He wraps his arms around your shoulders, and you hesitate only a second before bringing your arms around him too. You squeeze him tight. James lets himself relish the feel of it, lovelorn. “It’s not small,” he says fervently. “It really…it means a lot, sweetheart.” 

You only squeeze tighter in response. When he lets you go, your gaze is sad. Worried. You ask without prelude, “Are you doing okay?” 

James gives you a half-smile. The truth of it. “Yeah, we’re alright over here. It’s hard to see her like this, but I think everything’s going to be okay.” You nod, solemn in your understanding. “Sounds like I might be doing better than you, actually, if your company’s bad enough that you’re entertaining yourself in the kitchen all day.” 

You crack a smile at that, and James’ heart lightens. “Yeah, Singh’s no you. He doesn’t seem to like to chat.” 

“Ahh, so that’s why you’ve really come out here, yeah? You just missed me.” 

“You’ve caught me.” 

It’s said like a joke, but James’ pride inflates foolishly nonetheless. “I hate that I can’t be there,” he says. “Especially now that I know they’ve put Singh on my shift.” 

“He’s not so bad,” you laugh, heading towards the table. You fold up the bags. “Anyway, it’s more important that you’re here. And I’ll be back in a couple days to restock you.” 

James fixes you with a look as you start for the door. “You really don’t have to.” 

“I’m going to,” you say breezily. “Don’t forget to put the flowers in water, and the muffins are strawberry chocolate chip.” He grins. His mum’s favorite. “I’ll tell Singh you were raving about him.” 

“Oh, please do.” He rolls his eyes, feeling lighter than he has in days. “Thanks, angel.” 

You shoot him a smile worthy of the moniker as you go out the door. “See you in a couple days, Jamie.”

[reysdriver]

Favourite Jumper | R.L.

Remus is looking for his favourite autumn jumper and finds it on you — remus x gn!reader fluff

warnings: none :)

words: 0.4k

a/n: let's ignore the thing about the stairs turning into a slide because 1, that's literally something out of a 5 year-old's dream house design, and 2, it's not convenient to write rn so shhh

Remus dug through his drawers, searching for his favourite jumper. He knew he hadn’t worn it in a while, but he definitely packed it with him; he actually made sure of it because he knew that even though it had been a hot summer, the seasons were changing quickly.

When he had dug to the bottom of every drawer and he still couldn’t find it, his first thought was that one or all of his fellow Marauders had stolen it. 

In just a black undershirt, he walked down the stairs to the common room, hoping to get his jumper back. When he reached the bottom and saw you sitting on the couch, however, he found his answer. 

“I was looking for my favourite jumper, but I think I just found it.” He said, standing next to you, looking down. 

You looked up at him with an innocent smile. “It was cold outside, and I knew you had the best jumpers, my love.”

“And what am I supposed to wear?”

You shrugged. “I saw you had others in your room.” You brought your hand up to the hem of your boyfriend’s thin shirt. “But, I don’t know. You look really hot in this, too.”

You could see your flattery got to him. An adorable blush spread across his face, but he didn’t want to surrender. “You may think I look hot, but I’m actually pretty cold. I’m gonna need my jumper, love.”

You put on your best pouty face to convince him to let you keep it. “But it’s such a good jumper. Plus, I get way colder than you; I think you should give it to me as a gift for being so great.”

He sat down on the floor next to the couch and kissed your forehead. “Yeah, you are pretty great. I’ll have to send a letter to my mum asking her to make more jumpers though.”

You took his hand off the pillow where it was resting and held it in yours. “Thank you, Rem. I’ll even give you one of my cardigans in return.”

He smiled thankfully even though he knew your clothes would never fit his tall frame. “Yeah, that sounds like a fair trade.”

[lokischocolatefountain]

Separation

Series Masterlist

Fandom: Narcos

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader

Rating: 18+ (*slaps the roof of this fic* This bad boy can fit so much smut, angst and fluff in it)

Word count: 8.4k words wtf

Summary: The last time Javier Peña saw his wife was almost three weeks ago in Steve Murphy’s apartment. He’d finally done it. He’d fucked up the only good thing in his life, driven her away with his neglect.

A/N: Why is it that whenever I write Javi, there’s angst? What is it about this beautiful pathetic man with big brown eyes (and big strong arms) that makes me want to hurt and comfort him? Also, if any of you want to be tagged the next time I post Javi (or just husband Javi) lmk and I’ll make a tag list.

The last time Javier Peña saw his wife was in Steve Murphy’s apartment, holding a sleeping baby Olivia Murphy on her lap as she consoled an anxious Connie Murphy. That night, he’d finally brought his partner home to his wife and child. Relieved, he went home only to find a note from his wife by his bedside informing him that she would be staying with a friend for a while. No explanations, no phone calls. Just a note.

That was almost three weeks ago.

Her side of the bed stayed untouched. Her bedside table was unusually empty without her novel of the week on it. When he reached out for her in his sleep, his heart craving the familiar comfort of her touch, he found it cold and empty. He’d wake up with a start, unaccustomed to an empty bed even though he’d spent all his bachelor life before her sleeping by himself. It was as though married life had been a cruel fantasy he was awoken from to be forced back into the reality of his lonely existence.

No matter how many times he longed to call her friend’s landline, he couldn’t bring himself to dial the number. She’d been by his side ever since he asked her to move in with him. Undying loyalty, a shoulder to lean on, a body to hold when he awoke from nightmares. She deserved a break from him.

The refrigerator sometimes had boxes of meals for him, his whiskey glass was chilled, her laundry done and dried for him to fold up. Dishes left in the sink for him to wash. He had a wife and she did come by the apartment but never when he was there too. She’d been like a ghost, slipping in and out and probably through walls without his notice.

Their anniversary came and went. Still no sign of her.

It wasn’t their wedding anniversary. It was the anniversary of their first date. That was not something they celebrated like they did their wedding anniversary but her absence made him remember and it fucking stung.

He’d finally done it. He’d fucked up the only good thing in his life, driven her away with his neglect. She gave him everything and asked for nothing. Not even the bare minimum. Her parents had begged her for a proper wedding and he couldn’t even give her that. She married him at the embassy and went home alone in the short white dress she bought herself from a regular store as he went off on some fucking raid that ended up failing anyway. She watched as her friends had weddings and baby showers and children while he kept her stuck in the same place in life.

And she was finally gone. After putting up with everything, she’d slowly disappeared from his life without him even noticing it.

Javi found himself outside her classroom. He’d walked into the English Literature department, opened her drawer and checked her schedule, ignoring the questioning staff with the same practiced authority he had as DEA agent.

For the first time, he took in the force that was Professor Peña in action. He knew she was a fucking genius. But to see her command the classroom’s attention was something else.

On one of their first nights together, he’d put his head on her lap and closed his eyes as she played with her hair and asked her unashamedly to read her book out loud to him. He had a reputation of being an asshole, of sleeping around a lot. There was an image of him being a callus man who hopped from one bed to the next. It couldn’t be further from the truth. He gave bits and pieces of his heart to every woman he slept with, he asked personal questions, kissed foreheads and comforted them over their troubles. He lied on the lap of the woman he would one day marry and asked her to read him a bedtime story of how Anna Karenina fell out of love with Alexei and in love with Vronsky. Javier may have been an asshole in others’ eyes, but on her lap, he was the man who kept his parents’ easy intimacy in the back of his head as he looked up at her and wondered if he could have something like that with her.

As she engaged the classroom in a discussion about Frankenstein’s creation, he witnessed everyone around him fall for her just as he did. He watched as she pulled them into discussions and got them involved in passionate debates amongst themselves about the nature of the creature. She was the perfect leader, knowing just how to steer the large group, get the stubborn young people to question their world views and lead them to answers to questions they didn’t even know they had.

She was a wonder.

If this was all he could have of her, he would take it. If she wouldn’t come home to him anymore, he would show up to her classes and sit in the back seat just to hear her voice and see her eyes twinkle with passion.

She didn’t notice him, her attention reserved for the students who asked questions and argued their points passionately. He had to wait until they’d all submitted their papers to her and had a little conversation to continue their discussions. He’d never seen students so reluctant to leave a classroom. He couldn’t blame them; he didn’t want to leave either. Only when most of her class had shuffled out did he have the courage to approach her desk.

He stood there, making no sounds, just fidgeting with his right hand as he tried to find the courage in him to speak to the professor who was counting the number of essays that had been submitted to her.

“Sorry, I have to get home now. Office hours are before class on Monday,” she said, not even looking up at him.

“Sure, if that’s the only way I’ll get to see you.”

She stilled mid-count, letting go of the papers as she looked up at him. She opened and closed her mouth, as though swallowing everything she thought to say.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, finally.

He shrugged and managed a half-smile. “Had to catch you somehow.”

When she said nothing, he continued, “Where do you go when you tell your students you’re going home? Because you don’t come to ours.”

He carried her papers, her handbag and her lunch bag to the jeep. As though he had to confiscate all her belongings to make sure she’d actually come home with him. As though he was afraid she’d slip through his fingers like the sicarios he chased.

Her hand didn’t cross the physical space between them. Her head rested against the glass of the window and her eyes were closed. She didn’t reach over to switch the radio on, didn’t ask him about his day, didn’t reach over to pinch his cheek or steal his aviators.

“Talk to me,” he said, his voice shaking as he realized he didn’t want to hear whatever it was she had to say. He wasn’t prepared for the harsh truths. All he wanted was to take her to bed and kiss her all over and hold her tight so that she would never leave. He wanted to cry like a little boy begging his dad to not leave for work because he would miss him too much during the day. He wanted to overwhelm her with his love, manipulate her mind into taking him back though he couldn’t admit to himself that at some point she apparently stopped wanting to keep him.

His hand was on her knee as he sat at her feet and looked up at her face expectantly for her to speak. It wouldn’t have taken him more than a second to get on his knees. He was no religious man. That stopped the day he buried his Ma. But he would get on his knees again and pray to her to stay, to be his benevolent goddess and forgive his sins for the nth time.

“I don’t know what I did, I really don’t,” his voice cracked as he confessed. “But it must’ve been something terrible for you to stop coming home.” It shamed him to discover that he had become the man he promised himself he would never be. One of those inattentive men who’d grown so comfortable in the kindnesses of their wife that they’re shocked when she decides she has had enough. Neglect killed love. And he had been neglecting her, leaving her alone most days and most nights as he traveled back and forth between Bogotá and Medellin.

She stared at him, her expressions indiscernible. She accepted his hands when he placed them on hers, the small action giving him hopes. “Whatever it is, I’ll fix it,” he begged, holding on tight. He needed her to believe him.

She shook her head and looked down at her lap. “It’s not— you didn’t do anything wrong.”

After relief came surprise. He hadn’t done something wrong this time? The relief was quickly replaced by worry. If he was the cause of her running away from him, he could handle that. He could change himself, fix whatever within was wrong to make her come home again. But it was something else, someone else…

“What is it, then?” He asked, cupping her cheek and gently directing her to look at him instead of her lap or the walls. “Is it work? Are your parents doing well back home?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing.”

He inhaled and rubbed his eyes. “It can’t be nothing. You left me. You packed up your bags and left. I think I deserve an explanation.”

She let out a sigh. “I’ll come back then.”

His hand curled into a fist and his jaw clenched. So that was it? All he had to do was ask? Her easy compliance made him want to throw something at the wall.

He got off the ground where he was knelt at her feet and began pacing across the room.

He expected some resistance when he barged into her workplace uninvited and demanded that she come with him. He expected— no, hoped for a fight for it would give him answers for her sudden disappearance. But she just walked with him to the parking lot, no questions asked. And now she just agreed to move back in. All because he demanded answers.

“Fucking tell me!” He yelled, his hand fidgeting at his side.

“I don’t want to fight,” she said, her voice too calm for the gravity of the situation. Like this didn’t fucking matter.

Oh, you don’t wanna fight? You don’t wanna fucking fight? You fucking ran off and you don’t want to—

“I don’t either, but you’re making it very hard to not do that.”

He heard her take in a deep breath before he heard the unmistakable whispers of sniffling. Great. Fucking amazing. Now, he’d gone and made her cry.

Her sounds of despair were enough for his rage to evaporate off him. He rushed back to her side and pulled her to his chest, forcing comfort upon her in the hope that it would serve as a salve to whatever wounds he’d ripped open. To his relief, she didn’t push him away. But she didn’t pull him close like she always did when he embraced her. Things had changed and he hadn’t even noticed it happening. All he could do now was hope that whatever this rift was between them, he could patch it back together.

—————————

Even in the blistering heat of Bogotá, Javier chose to keep his wife pressed to his chest when he slept. She was disgusted by their sweat combining and their clothes sticking to their bodies, but she indulged his need for closeness. She knew he loved with his body and she accepted his love, in all its sweaty sticky mess.

So he had no choice but to interpret the chasm between them on their marital bed as her rejection of his love.

As soon as he brought her back home, he had to leave for Medellin. Any hopes for setting things right had been crushed when he had to leave from work straight to the other city. He’d called home before he left, informing he would be gone for a long time once again. She didn’t say much, just hemmed and hawed before asking him to be safe out there. No exaggerated smooching sounds to make him laugh, no promises of what would be awaiting him when he came back home to her, no I love you before she said goodbye.

Over ten days after the call, he was back but without any of the feelings of satisfaction he usually had when coming home to her. Instead, there was just dread. She met him at the door as usual and wrapped her arms around him, but she separated without a kiss. The cracks in the foundations of their marriage ran deeper than he’d feared.

“Hey,” he whispered awkwardly when she finally opened her eyes. She stilled, her head jerking up as though surprised he was there.

“Hey,” she replied, her voice groggy from sleep as she shuffled under her blanket.

“I missed you so much, mi amor…” he said carefully, afraid that anything he might say would snap the last thread that held them together. His hand slowly crept into the space between them, an offering to share the littlest bit of marital comforts.

“Missed you too, Javi,” she conceded, not taking his hand but settling for playing with his fingers. He allowed her to lead, giving what little contact she took from him and taking back only as much, afraid to cross any lines.

Her nails were uncharacteristically unkempt. The woman he knew did not tolerate chipped nail polish, wiping all her nails with acetone when the paint began chipping off. Almost all her nails except her pinky had chipped paint now. Her thumbnail was bare.

“May I paint your nails?” He asked, hopeful. She nodded and he left their bed in search of the box in which she kept all her manicure tools and paints.

When they sat together on bed as he took the pink off her nails, they were closer. He handled her hands with care, refusing to scrub too harshly even when the pieces of glitter clung to her as stubbornly as he did. Manicures were something she got done from salons, but she painted her own nails just as often. She said it calmed her.

He then brought the glass file to her nails, reducing them to a shorter oval shape the way she liked them. Any longer and she found it hard to use her typewriter. He made sure to file the edges in the same direction, recalling that she’d told him filing in opposite directions was not good for nail health. He repositioned her hand in his, turning it left and right as he evaluated his work. Satisfied with the shape, he brought his lips to the finger, his eyes remaining on hers the entire time to check for any signs of rejection. He pressed little kisses from her fingertip to her wrist, relishing in the shy smiles she rewarded him with.

He repeated his work with the other nails and then used the little wooden stick she had to push her cuticles back in preparation for the paint. The shower would wash it off soon, but he still slathered some moisturizer on her hands, using it as an excuse to massage her hands. He pushed the excess cream beyond her wrists and up her arms.

He kissed the back of her hand and looked up at her, her eyes clouded with sleep and something else, her plush lips parting as his own traveled up her arm. “You feel so good, baby, so soft,” he praised, making her shudder. When he reached the sleeve of his t-shirt that she liked wearing to bed, he pulled it down, exposing her shoulder. As he neared her neck, she cradled his head in her hand, guiding him by his hair to place kisses where she wanted them. His lips went willingly, loving her up in every spot she took him to. She was all sweat, citrus shampoo and the jasmine of the lotion he’d rubbed on her. He breathed her in, her scent being his choice of drug.

She pulled him back from her neck, gazing at his lips before closing her eyes and leaning forward. He brushed the tip of his nose against hers, making her giggle. He smiled before leaning in again but kissing her chin.

“Javi,” she whined as he kissed along her jaw and the corners of her lips and even her nose, refusing to press his lips to hers.

“Yeah, baby?” He asked, feigning innocence. But she knew him too well to believe the act.

“Jodón.”

“Tell me what you want.” He demanded, craving the feeling of being wanted. He needed to know that she needed him just like he needed her, that she wasn’t just capitulating to his desires, that she desired him.

“Kiss me.”

He found himself grinning as he took her face in his hands and tilted his head, unhurried in how he grazed her lips with his. She took initiative, pressing her lips to his. She consumed him, not like a starving woman but like one ready to savor each second of her meal. He let one hand wander down her back, caressing her through the thin fabric but not daring to slip it under her t-shirt. He needed her to take this at her pace, unaffected by his greed and desperation to have all of her. It was fantastic how just a kiss from her could make him feel his heart beating for her.

He’d kissed other women before her and he enjoyed all those times. But with her, it was different. It wasn’t the first step in fucking, wasn’t a means to an end. When he kissed her, he wasn’t a lonely man trying to imitate a deeper intimacy he’d never had merely to quell his yearning for connection. In her lips, he found not just the thrill of desire, but the safety of home.

The first time he kissed her, every other kiss ceased to exist and she’d become the only one. Everyone he kissed after that first kiss left him unsatisfied. None of them tasted like her, didn’t send jolts of electricity through him, didn’t make his heart leap out of his chest.

She mewled into the kiss as his tongue danced with hers, giving in to her exploration of his mouth as she pulled him closer to herself. Taking her sounds as encouragement, he tangled his hands into her hair. He poured a month’s worth of longing into the kiss, asking with each sigh and moan ‘Can you feel how I yearn for you? Can you not feel how you broke me when you left and put me back together with just this kiss?’

She pulled back first and he found himself panting, taking in the air he didn’t know he was depriving himself of. He pounced back, needing her more than he needed oxygen. He took her lips between his, pushing her head into the headboard as he pulled her into a heated kiss. One hand roamed his shoulder and then his arms, up and down and driving him mad as the other rested over his heart. He brought a hand to hers, trapping hers over his heart. He felt lightheaded as she staved him of air, but he happily drowned in her. He needed her to feel him, feel how his heart beat to her tune, how it missed having her head rest on it as they slept in each other’s arms.

“Please, Javi. Need you…” she broke off to whisper. He placed one last kiss to her lips before he slid down the bed, pulling her to the edge before pulling her shorts off her. He dove in and licked her through her panties, savoring the taste of her wetness on the cotton. Her hand found his hair and tugged gently.

“You have no fucking idea how much I’ve missed having you, querida…” he said, placing a kiss between her legs.

“I miss you so much, Javi…”

“No, you don’t know,” he insisted, angered that she would claim to have missed him after she left him. If you missed me so much, why didn’t you come back? He pressed his thumb on her clit, pressed a bit harder than she liked and she whined.

“I’m sorry!”

“You left. You walked out on me, didn’t tell me shit and I was fucking miserable,” he confessed, passing on the hurt right back to her. She mumbled a few more apologies, but nothing would be enough until he got to take her again.

“Gonna let me show you how much I missed you, baby?” He asked, placing kisses on her belly. “Gonna let me make love to you?”

“Yes, yes, please. Need youuu—” she cried as he pushed the cotton of her panty aside to lick her.

“You need me?” He asked, licking her again. God, how he missed his favorite taste. “Did you miss my cock like I missed this pussy, baby?”

She nodded, but that wasn’t enough for him. He needed to know from her lips, needed her to scream for the entire city to know how she missed his touch. He pushed her legs back together and pulled her panties off before setting it aside. He wrapped his lips around her and sucked on her clit, exacting the sweetest little sounds from her.

“I need to hear you.”

“Missed you, Javi. Missed your cock,” she confessed, tightening around his finger as she did. He wished he had his cock inside her as he made her tell him how much she missed it. He would pull more confessions out of her with a promise of an orgasm and he knew she would say anything he wanted.

“You have ruined me, mi amor. Can’t make myself cum just as good anymore without this pussy. Hate my own fucking hand.” He praised before he lapped and laved at her core, licking her up as he made her wetter and wetter for him.

“I sneaked your panties out of the laundry hamper, took it with me to Medellin like a fucking creep,” he confessed, unsure if her cry of his name was the work of his fingers or the confession of his depravity. “The pink one with the stripes, covered in you from when you touched yourself, when you kept this cunt to yourself and kept me away. I needed to smell it when I wrapped my fist around my cock and imagined I was fucking you.”

She clenched around his finger and that sent a rush through him. “That make you feel good, Cariño? Knowing you’ve turned me into a fucking pervert?”

“Javi, baby please…” she cried as he busied his lips once again with her cunt. He would’ve left her pussy lips for the lips that cried his name so prettily but she kept him down with her hand on his hair. She fucked herself on his fingers, gasping when he added a third one to stretch her out further.

His idle hand traveled up her body, its every nerve ending enjoying having her tremble beneath him once again. He took his time, roaming everywhere, feeling every inch of skin that he would soon trap under him as he fucked her for the first in a long time. This was the longest they’d gone without each other ever since they decided to pursue what they had for real. Even with his job being the way it was, he managed to come to Bogota every now and then to have her.

She wrapped her legs around him, trapping his head with her thighs as she dug the heel of her foot into his back. He growled into her cunt as she thrust up into him, fucking his mouth and his fingers at the same time. She still wanted him in between her legs if nowhere else and if he had to, he would fuck her into staying with him forever.

A few more minutes of licking and sucking and she was pulsating around his fingers, her thighs setting enough pressure on him to make him fear that she might crush him. With a cry of his name, she came for him, coating him in her juices. He drank up all of her, not showing any restraint.

She pulled him up by his hair and he obeyed, kissing her lips to bless her with her deliciousness. He dipped his tongue into her mouth, meeting her tongue as she moaned with her own taste. He placed his hand over her collarbones, smearing her all over the place before he crept up and held her neck as he relished in the vibrations of her moans.

He gasped into the kiss as she wrapped her hand around him through his boxers. He grabbed her wrist and held her in place, keeping her from stroking his cock. It’d been too long since he had her and he wasn’t going to waste this morning by coming in his fucking underwear.

“Let me have you, baby,” he begged, dipping down to her neck to lick up her cum that he had smeared over her. He wasn’t going to let any of her go to waste.

“Yes, fuck!” She reached into his boxers and took him out, painfully hard and already leaking precum. He licked and sucked the skin until it was marred from his attention.

“Wanna be on top, please,” she begged and he rolled them around, acquiescing to her. She sat up on him, her knees planted on either side of him before taking her t-shirt off to reveal her pretty tits. Before he could reach up for her himself, she took command in taking his hand and placing it on her breast.

“Missed this so much, Javi,” she said as she stroked his cock. He kneaded her breast in his hand, enjoying having the ample flesh in his hands.

“Need to be inside you, please,” he breathed, trying as much as he could to clear his thoughts for if he focused on her hand around his cock and how gorgeous she looked on him, he would burst in an instant.

She obliged, adjusting herself over him before living him up with herself. She let him inside her wet heat, just the tip, before pulling back up. He groaned at the loss of contact, biting down on his lip as she repeated the motion, giving him just a bit of her pussy before pulling away once again.

He grabbed her hand and squeezed. “Don’t fucking tease. I haven’t had you in the longest time, darling. I need—ssss” he hissed as she took him in once more.

“I’m not teasing,” she gasped silently as she allowed a little more of him inside her. “So big, Javi. Haven’t stretched me out like this in s-so long,” she praised as she swallowed him bit by bit. “So fucking thick, gonna ruin me.”

“That’s right, baby… You love this cock, don’t you? Can’t go for anyone else ever again. I’ve made you mine,” he said, moving his other hand to her clit, moaning when she rewarded his touch by gripping him tighter.

“Mmmm love your cock,” she moaned as she struggled to take more of him even though he’d gotten her nice and wet with his fingers and mouth. Poor thing needed time to get used to his girth again after having gone such a long time without him.

“You are so beautiful like this… Look so fucking sinful trying so hard to take all of me, sitting on top of me like that and letting me touch your tits,” he praised as he played with her nipples, pinching and tugging and rolling between his fingers to make her tighten around him. She might have been on top, taking the reins, but he still had control. He knew her body like he knew the communas where he chased men, knew every shortcut, memorized every path, knew where to go to corner and capture them. He could elicit every desired response from her by touching her in the right places and saying the right words. She belonged to him, body and soul, and he enjoyed using every inch of her body to remind her to whom she belonged.

He let her set a slow torturous pace as she adjusted to him, groaning as she finally swallowed him to the hilt. It was pure bliss to be surrounded whole by her, to feel all of her wet, velvety heat. He felt her all over, from the tips of his toes to the top of his head and it was everything. She was everything.

It was sweet torment to be exposed to the cold air of the fan only to be swallowed back up by her hot cunt. He needed her so fucking bad, needed her not just for the carnal pleasures that sex brought but the feeling of home when he found himself buried in her— he needed her to devour him whole and keep him right there, inside her, all hers and nothing else. Only the Javier that belonged to her was worth existing. Everything else he’d become in over three decades of life was insignificant.

Inside the walls of their home, on their marital bed, there was no world outside. She brought him the delusions of safety and he luxuriated in it, allowing himself to forget everything that wasn’t her. The world was just her tight cunt, her tits under his hands and the filthy sounds from her lips as she slowly went from a woman in control to a writhing, moaning mess. He met her halfway with his thrusts when she struggled to keep up on top of him. He sat himself up and pulled her to his chest, giving in as she stole his lips. It was hurried and sloppy as they explored familiar territory, still as excited as the first time they kissed each other. Practiced lovers, savoring the familiar comfort of each other’s lips yet excited to find something new each time.

“Don’t ever leave me,” he begged, holding her face in his hand and making her look at him in the hopes that she would see just how much he meant it. “I can’t, without you… I— I c-can’t, mi amor— Please…”

“I w-won’t,” she managed to stutter out as she grew breathless.

“Promise me,” he demanded even though what he wanted to do was beg.

She opened and closed her mouth, unable to form words as he set a relentless pace, taking over as he thrust into her and thumbed her clit.

“Fucking promise me!” He growled, forcing himself into her in hard, merciless thrusts.

“Aaaah! Ja—”

“You’re mine. You’re fucking mine, get it? This isn’t— We aren’t just da-dating. I’m your husband. You can’t just leave like that.” He forced himself deep and inadvertently hit her cervix. She jolted in his arms and let out a pained cry, letting him know his mistake and he pressed a kiss to her cheek in a silent apology.

“Sorr— hnnng! ‘m sorry Jav—”

A tear slipped down her cheek and he kissed it, tasting her. He breathed her name the way a dying man would call for his god in desperation. He prayed her name, each syllable a request of Save me, never leave me, breathe life into this wretched man.

She pulsated around him, collapsing on his chest and relying on him to hold her up as she reached her peak. She was deadweight in his arms and he held her tight as he reamed into her, her back arching and her hair cascading down her back, shaking from his hard thrusts. She took him along with her, erasing his world and making herself his everything. She had dragged him to the peak of the world and now she was pulling him down and he went with her willingly, taking everything she gave him, getting lost in her body. She was like a breath of air after drowning for eternity, she gave him life, gave him meaning even though she’d been the one to rob him of it.

He wiped her tears and kissed her all over, showering her with all the love he had for her. But it wasn’t enough. No matter how much he poured out, he couldn’t show her the depth of his feelings for her. No words compared, no kisses came close to the place she had in his life. No matter how many times he told her he loved her, she would never know just how much.

“Te amo, Javi,” she broke off from their kiss to whisper. He collapsed on the bed and brought her down with him. He pecked her lips once and then twice before setting his gaze on her eyes.

“Si me amas…” he paused to take a breath. “¿por qué me dejaste? ¿Por qué?”

She looked down at her lap and fidgeted with her rings as she spoke, “Y-yo no quiero perderte.”

He shook his head as he said, “No me perderás. Yo soy tuyo.” He took her hand and placed it on his chest over his heart. “Tuyo.”

She scoffed, her hand curling over his chest. “More Escobar’s than mine at this point.”

“What?”

She shook her head and looked away, avoiding his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to— I shouldn’t complain.”

“No. No, you talk to me. What is this about?”

“We’ll fight if we talk about it. Like Steve and Connie.”

“Do you…? Do you want to leave…? Like Connie did?” He asked, unable to steady his shaking voice. Three weeks with her gone was hell enough. If she wanted to take off permanently, he didn’t know what he would do with himself. Hunting the hijo de puta had become his purpose in life over the past few years. But he now had another important purpose, a woman he’d made promises to. Promises he was insistent on keeping.

She shook her head.

He sighed as he tucked her hair behind her ear, needing to see her without anything in the way. It was fucking frustrating, not knowing what worried her so much that she couldn’t even talk to him about it, that she chose instead to run away from him. But he had to be kind if he wanted her to open up.

He began by caressing her cheek with the back of his hand. Gently, like soothing a wounded child. “Baby… If you don’t tell me what this is about, how am I going to fix it? Hmm?”

“It can’t be fixed,” she said, same as that day.

It took him a moment to know how to answer her.

“When I asked you to marry me, you asked that I give you all of me. Have I not kept that promise?” He asked, knowing that he had so far. No matter how ugly, no matter how broken, he brought home all of himself. To her credit, she accepted him just as he was.

She nodded and said, “you have.”

“Now I’m asking. I want everything, too. Whatever you’re hiding from me that has you worried will make us fight. Is it about my job?”

“I’m sorry,” she said as she nodded, head hung low as tears spilled out.

“No, no, nothing to be sorry about. Just talk to me. What about my job?”

“S-scared.” His chest tightened at the trembling of her voice. Relationships were not something he was comfortable with after he left Lorraine and it was alright for his dangerous new lifestyle as an agent in Colombia. There was no one else he was putting in danger because of his line of work. But then he had to go and fall in love.

It was one of the reasons he proposed to her as soon as he could. Being his wife offered her more legal protection than did being his girlfriend. And knowing that she was it for him, he saw no point in waiting. But she was still afraid for her safety.

He reached out quickly to reassure her.

“I’m here, okay? Our home is safe. Those bastards won’t dare touch you here, won’t dare touch a US federal agent’s wife. I got you,” he whispered into her ear and rubbed her back, hoping to help her relax in his arms. She didn’t. She just tensed.

“‘m not worried about m-myself,” she said softly. “Ever since Steve got kidnapped, I—”

He took in a deep breath and pulled her in closer even though there was no gap between them. What was he supposed to do? Tell her he was safe? Lying wasn’t something he was ready to do in their marriage. Even if he did, she wouldn’t believe him after she had to comfort a panicking Connie. He had the same job as Steve, faced the same dangers. It could be him next. And he might not be lucky enough to come home.

The CNP guys were in much greater danger than he was as an American. Call it gringo privilege. But he couldn’t make promises. He couldn’t promise that a jump from the roof wouldn’t end up terribly. He couldn’t promise that he would never catch a stray bullet. He couldn’t promise that a crazy motherfucker wouldn’t target him for the bragging rights over nabbing a US agent.

Small town sheriff Javier Peña hadn’t thought of all this when he signed up for this job in his mid twenties. There was just an opportunity to run away from a town that hated him— a town he hated more for how it smothered him from all sides as he grew and grew yet it remained small, insignificant. It was his chance to do something great, to be the good guy fighting big bag guys and he took it. He hadn’t been warned that he’d one day be sat holding his sobbing wife, speechless because he couldn’t make the most basic promise— to fucking stay alive.

“I’m sorry,” she whimpered, the tremble in her voice tugging at his heartstrings.

“No, no. I’m sorry.” Sorry I can’t give you more. Sorry I made you cry. He pulled her into his arms and sat on the couch, cradling her in his lap more for his comfort than hers.

“I shouldn’t complain. I know I married a man with a dangerous job. I signed up for all this, but… ‘m so scared, Javi. I can’t sleep at night. I wake up from nightmares and I lose you every single time. I get scared when I get a call because what if—” she stopped, breaking down into sobs.

There was nothing he could do to fix this, she was correct. The thing that was causing her all this agony was his whole life.

“Do you want me to quit my job?” He asked, regretting it the minute the question left his lips. What if she said yes? What if that was the only way to fix their marriage? He would quit. There was no question about that. But that would mean that almost a decade of his life’s work would be worth nothing. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself. Resentment would break anything they had left between them.

Please don’t ask that of me.

She shook her head and he had to keep himself from letting out a huge sigh of relief.

“Do you know I have students who— I shouldn’t tell you. I’m not on the field like you and I don’t know all the things you know, but I see everyday how he’s fucking ruined lives. I want you to catch that motherfucker. You’re in this fight and I’m not letting you leave it without crushing his blood empire. I just don’t want us to be collateral damage. I can’t bear losing you whether it is to divorce or a bullet. I can’t—” she brought her hand to her lips, biting on her newly shaped nails.

He swallowed, tugging her hand away from her mouth and giving it a kiss. “I can’t make promises about the latter,” he said softly, unable to look her in the eyes as he said it. He didn’t want to know what he did to her with those words. “You know I can’t. But when I die, whether it’s tomorrow or 40 years from now, I’ll die your husband. I don’t do divorce. You might think it’s not a big deal for me, the guy who left his first fiancé at the altar. But trust me, you’re a catch and there’s no way I’m letting you escape”

She laughed and nuzzled into his neck. He rested his head on hers and pressed a kiss to her hair. “I’m not joking. You should be very scared, baby. As far as I’m concerned, I’m it for you. Won’t let you leave no matter what you do.”

“Yeah?” She laughed, her eyes glinting with tears but also something new. Her lips quirked up in a mischievous smile. “What if I slept with a bunch of guys?”

He raised an eyebrow, reeling the unhinged jealous little man in his heart to join her in whatever this was that made her smile through her tears. “Good for them. Best pussy they’ll ever have. I mean, I will beat them to death for touching you. But you’re still my wife. Not divorcing you.”

“What if I fucked Steve?” She challenged, raising an eyebrow.

He knew what she was doing. She was making it personal, putting a face to the act and making said face a very familiar one. But he wouldn’t give her the satisfaction.

“Last thing he’ll ever do in his life. I’ll kill him and Connie will help me hide his body.”

“Mhmm? What if…..?” She trailed, looking into the distance as she stroked her invisible beard. “What if I let someone else knock me up?”

“You bitch!”

She gasped and shoved at his chest. “How dare you call me a bitch!?”

“How dare you even think of letting another man do that?”

“I won’t actually do that!” She defended, folding her arms over her chest. “I’m just trying to get a raise out of you.”

“And you did,” he supplied, making her scoff.

“How about…? Okay! What if I fucked Escobar?”

“Shit, I would tell everyone!” He laughed. “My wife? Getting that close to that piece of shit and living to tell the story? Yeah, I’d be on the rooftops with a megaphone. Oh and I’ll kill him. Of course. Goes without saying.”

“Well, you were gonna kill him anyway. What will you do to him for touching your wife?” She asked, twirling his overgrown hair around her finger.

Was this…? Noooo! He was just joking, but she seems to like the idea of him killing men for wanting her.

“Baby, what’s wrong with you?” He asked, laughing. She surprised him every goddamn day.

“I don’t know, you tell me,” she licked her lips and drew shaped on his chest with her index finger. “There should be an explanation for why I signed up for all this.”

“You like this, don’t you?” He asked, lowering the register of his voice the way she liked as he took her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “You want me to possess you, to hurt anyone who would want you that way I have you. You like that I can be a dangerous man.”

She shivered, but quickly stabilised herself, looking very blasé as she spoke, “Huh, that answers my question. I always wondered what kind of idiot would be with Escobar. I guess women just like to fuck a powerful man. And money. She’d gotta be in it for the money.”

“She married him before he got rich, actually. And it’s not just women who are attracted to powerful men,” he added, letting her know just how much he liked when she was in a position of power.

“Men too? You’re gonna tell me you want to fuck Escobar?” She asked, making him laugh. He pinched her bum, making her squeal and attempt to get off him. He pulled her back in immediately, not ready to lose contact.

“When I came to your class, I sat in the back the entire time. I enjoyed seeing you in your element, leading the discussion, getting a big room full of people to listen to you. And your ass in a pencil skirt. If I was your student, I would wank off every day thinking of you” he groaned, his cock twitching inside her at the mental image.

“Oh my god!” She exclaimed before hitting him playfully.

“Whaaat? I feel bad for those fuckers in your class, having to talk about Frankenstein’s monster to impress their hot little literature professor.”

“Don’t sexualise my job!” She looked positively scandalised. Like he’d suggested that she let him fuck her on the streets.

“Uh huh? Now you know how it feels? What was that you asked me for your birthday?” He teased. “On yds, the little interrogation fantasy. You’ve been begging me to tie you up and interrogate you.”

She hid her smile from him, covering her face with her hands, but he pried them off to see her looking so sweetly shy at being reminded of the depraved things she wanted him to do to her. “You don’t have to do it,” she said, shy and quiet and she played with her rings.

“Mmm thank you baby, but I’m gonna make your dreams come true. Just be happy I’m not CIA. Cause CIA has some terrible interrogation methods. They’ll fucking waterboard you.”

“Oh my god! Okay this isn’t fun anymore,” she said, getting off him, but he pulled her right back onto his cock, laughing as he caught her expression.

“Let me go!”

“No, no sorry. I shouldn’t talk about the CIA in bed, they’re such a turn off.”

“You think that’s why I’m trying to escape?? Javi, women don’t like talking about waterboarding with a dick inside them.”

“Okay, okay, I know. Just stay in bed. I have today off and I need to be inside you,” he said, rubbing her back in an attempt to coax her into foregoing her household responsibilities for a lazy day in bed with him.

“I have work to do. Papers to grade and clothes to wash. Oh and some pervert,” she said, poking his chest a few times. “has been stealing my panties so I have to go wash them before he gets to them.”

“Oh please, it was just one pair,” he lied, looking away quickly but it wasn’t enough for him to get away with it.

She squinted her eyes at him and he relented. “Fine. It was three. Pink one with the stripes, blue lace ones and a white cotton panty.”

“Pervert!”

“Or I’m just really in love with my wife. You should see the sweet side of it. You don’t know how other guys act on the field. It’s like as soon as they’re in Medellin, they aren’t married.”

“Uh huh?” She said as she tilted her head, her tone suggesting that she wasn’t convinced by his words. “And I’m supposed to be grateful that you aren’t sleeping around? Pendejo!” She punctuated her curse with a slap to his chest.

“That’s not what I meant!” He defended, taking her slapping hand and giving it a kiss.

“Sure, Cabrón.”

He laughed, amused at how adorable she was when angry. He pulled her down to lie down with him, her head on his chest and his hand in her hair. Mornings like these had become so rare. Even without their period of separation, they didn’t have quality time together. Work always called, always overwhelmed and left him with very little to give as a husband. Being too tired to do anything else, he couldn’t even take her out anywhere for dinner. But that would change tonight.

“I made dinner reservations for us. Are you free tonight?”

He’d booked it a while back, but he didn’t know if she would want to go with him after she left. And he didn’t want to promise her a date night before he knew for sure that he would have the day off from work. She did not take it terribly when he had to calculate on her for work, but something told him it wasn’t good for a marriage to keep breaking promises.

“Hmm, I don’t know. This pendejo said he’ll paint my nails and did a half assed job. I might have to book a nail appointment for the night,” she teased, making him laugh. He’d completely forgotten that their activities were preceded by his request to paint her nails.

“I’ll finish the job now,” he said, getting up, but she pushed him back down and trapped him in a loving hug.

“Later. I just wanna stay like this a little longer. Feels good…”

“I like when you hold me like this, mi amor,” he confessed, his voice softening as he opened himself up to allow himself to bask in the euphoria that holding her to his chest brought him.

“I- it calms me down. I need to hear your heart beating. I wake up from bad dreams sometimes and I can’t fall back asleep if I don’t lie down like this.”

He froze. He had no idea she had nightmares. “You never told me.”

“Didn’t want to worry you.”

He said her name softly, making her look up at him from his chest.

“You have to tell me these things,” he said, moving her hair out of the way so he could have an unobstructed view of her. Her features were soft, her eyes open, vulnerable.

“You have a lot on your plate already… I don’t want to be one of your problems.”

“Jesus,” he swore before sighing. “You’re not- I’ll never think of you as a problem. I understand why you worry. It’s not unwarranted. I would never ask you to hide your feelings for me. I thought we talked about these things. You’re the one who’s always telling me that we should communicate about difficult things. What happened to that?”

“Do you remember when I made you choose? Either date me for real or stop coming over for anything other than sex?”

He hummed in response, encouraging her to continue. They'd been fooling around for around two months back then and one night when he was dressing himself to leave, she forced him to confront how he’d been treating her— he’d been giving her mixed signals, pulling her in and pushing her away. He’d act like her boyfriend one minute but get distant the next and she was understandably annoyed.

“And you said you wanted to date me but you warned me that your job was dangerous and that attachments were a weakness. I didn’t want to be your weakness, I still—”

He shook her head, interrupting her mid-sentence, “I was talking out of my ass, I was just scared. And it’s different now. We’re—”

“Yeah but when I think of you strapping a gun and badge on yourself to go out and get shot at by those malparidos, I want to stop you,” she choked on her words, getting up off his chest and hugging her knees to her chest. “I told you I could handle it. That day and the day you asked me to marry you. But, I can’t. I can’t handle it. Ever since Steve was kidnapped- and I know you said he wasn’t in any real danger, but fuck! It was terrifying to see Connie like that and I couldn’t help but worry and put myself in her place. And I couldn’t stop thinking about every terrible thing that could happen to you and I just wanted to lock you up at home. So I left- because I don’t want to be your weakness. But I can’t be brave, I can’t be strong.”

It broke his heart to know that behind the scenes, behind her easy smiles and her strong shoulders he leaned on everyday, there was so much fear. So much insecurity. There was shame too. Had he been more attentive, he would’ve known without her having to tell him, without her having to run away.

He sat up, pulled her close and placed a kiss on her head. “You are brave and you’ve been so strong, putting up with more of my shit than you need to… Sometimes I think I won’t get through this with my soul intact if it weren’t for you. So never think that you’re my weakness.”

She listened, her eyebrows furrowed and eyes never leaving him. She bit down on her lip, pulling at the skin with her teeth, something she did when anxious. He reached over and thumbed her lip, not wanting to wait until she started bleeding.

“I… I’ve put you in a difficult position, but I would never ask you to hide your fears for my comfort. And you leaving definitely did not make me stronger. Just scared the hell out of me. I thought I’d done something so shit that you’d left for good.”

“Sorry I left… I just—”

“I’m sorry you couldn��t talk to me. Not like that would’ve solved anything,” he scoffed, rubbing his eyes. “Nothing short of stopping that bastard is going to solve this.”

“I know, I know…” she sighed.

“I’ll get him,” he affirmed, taking her hands in his. All the things he’d done since he landed in Colombia, all the things he’d lost because of that man… To think he might lose her too… It was chilling. He’d lost friends, made enemies, became the guy everyone called an asshole for not cutting corners, for not putting up with anything that wasn’t right. He’d lost so much, but she wasn’t going to be one of them. He wouldn’t allow it.

Javier Peña wouldn’t rest until Escobar was history.

.

.

.

Series Masterlist

[gritsgigabits]

Slashers NSFW headcanons~

In celebration of 69 followers, I want to throw some sexy headcanons at y’all!

TW: NSFW (duh) and derogatory language

Jason Voorhees

Growing up with Pamela, Jason learnt early on that sex was a nasty and filthy thing that could never lead to anything good. When you first brought up the issue of taking the relationship further, it was difficult to get Jason to even talk about the subject with you.

You had to explain it to him that sex wasn’t only for horny teenagers or for one night stands – it could also be one of the most tender and beautiful ways of showing someone how much you loved them.

It took a lot of patience and many one-sided conversations on your part to get Jason adjusted to the idea of having sex. He was worried you would pressure him or become agitated because of his reluctance to sleep with you.

Having sex with Jason was awkward at first, as it tends to be for first timers. Jason is a big boy, both in height and… you know, so he wants to be extra careful when you two get intimate. He would never want to hurt you, unintentionally or otherwise.

Bubba Sawyer

Bubba hasn’t received that much sex education. Everything he knows he has learnt from Drayton, and all that Drayton ahs taught him is that sex is troublesome and if you want to stay out of trouble, you shouldn’t do it.

Bubba doesn’t consider sex to be a bad thing at all! However, he is very awkward and can’t seduce anyone to save his life. He is relieved that now that he has you, he won’t ever have to seduce anyone.

Bubba has this idea that he wants to be the most tender lover you could ever have, but it often backfires on him tremendously. He usually initiates sexual activities in a romantic way, and everything is sweet and sensual – until he is inside you.

From the first thrust onwards, he loses his senses and is concentrated on nothing but chasing pleasure. What begins as gentle sex soon turns into him madly thrusting into you at a pace that is both maddeningly satisfying and brutally irregular. It continues like that until he comes.

Despite Bubba’s tendency to get lost in the moment, he won’t leave you hanging if you don’t get the chance to come. After he’s finished, Bubba is always ready to lend you a helping hand or a skilled mouth if you need it.

Thomas Hewitt

Thomas is quite well-endowed, and he isn’t always as gentle as he should be. You might have to procure a bottle of lube to keep in the drawer of your bedside table because foreplay isn’t Thomas’ strong suit.

Although he can be too rough and impatient at times, Thomas doesn’t have sadistic tendencies when it comes to sex. He has a massive dick that will tear you apart of you’re not ready for it, but Thomas doesn’t want to hurt you.

In fact, Thomas’ preferences when it comes to sex are quite vanilla. He isn’t opposed to trying new things if you’re into some kinky shit, though.

The point is to keep as quiet as possible when you two are intimate, because you two live in one house with the rest of his family. It is would be awkward to hear Luda May scold you two at the breakfast table the next morning about how much noise you two were making.

Whenever you have privacy, Thomas likes to take you rough and draw out as much noise from you as possible. Hearing you scream (with pleasure) is a sure-fire way to get him close and over the edge.

Brahms Heelshire

The entertainment options in the Heelshire mansion are extremely restricted: unless you somehow convince Brahms to let you set up internet connection, you only have the record player, a TV that’s far from state-of-the-art, and each other.

Brahms is absolutely of the opinion that sex is the best pastime there is. He has the sex drive of a seventeen-year-old, and that combined with his demanding attitude results in him demanding you to spread your legs for him every day.

Brahms is a huge bottom in everyday life and wants you to be in charge of things outside of the bedroom. In sexual situations, though, he refuses to be the submissive party. It’s him on top, whether you like it or not.

Brahms is into BDSM-esque things: he likes to have you restrained by tying you up or physically holding you down. In the latter case, he gets off on proving to you that even if you tried to run away from him, he would catch you and wouldn’t allow you to go.

In the bedroom where he’s boss, Brahms has his own set of rules that he expects you to obey. If you don’t do as he says, you’ll be punished. It’s for you to decide whether you want to play by his rules or risk getting spanked until your arse is fiery red.

Michael Myers

As a rule, Michael doesn’t have a major sex drive. He likes to fuck, and if you’re feeling up to it, he won’t reject your passes at him. Michael might be well past his teens but he can still get it up with no problem.

For Michael, sex often lacks the emotional aspect. It’s simply a way for him to de-stress and release tension, and he often treats you as nothing more than his own personal fuck-toy.

Michael didn’t think there was anything more to sex than the point of shooting his load until he met you who demanded more from him. You constantly nagged him to think of sex as something meaningful, which seemed like a pain in the ass for him.

Michael is very adaptable to new situations, however, and decided to give it a chance to think of sex as something important in a relationship.

He would still rather take you hard and fast than put effort into seducing you, but he has found that he gets better results if he takes you into account more.

Happy wife, happy life, they say.

Billy Loomis

Considering his maniacal tendencies, sex with Billy can be borderline boring at times. He doesn’t really fantasise about anything and doesn’t have any specific kinks that he’d like to try out. He likes ‘normal sex’, as he calls it.

Sex with him can be romantic and sweet, and if you’re up for that pure vanilla action, then you two are going to hit it off and get each other off just fine.

If you’re more the adventurous type, you can convince him to get out of his comfort zone. You might find that Billy isn’t quite as against spicing things up in the bedroom as he assured you he was.

The element of surprise and good timing are your best friends when it comes to getting Billy to try something new. Present him with a butt plug in the middle of a make-out session, pull a puppy-eyed expression while telling him how much you want him to use it (or use it on you), and he won’t have the time to process the request enough to refuse out of principle.

Don’t worry though – Billy will loudly protest if you ever bring up something he honestly doesn’t want to do, even if you make the request while he’s thrusting into you and can’t think clearly otherwise.

[jina1028]

Helping Hand

Yunho x fem!reader

Categories: roommates!au, smut, masturbation (fem), sex toys, fingering, oral (f rec), vaginal penetration, non protected sex (don't do this irl), creampie, Yunho has a big dick

You just got home from a "couples date" that your friend insisted so much you took part in because "Come on, you're single, I think I like him but it would be less awkward if there's someone with me, and he has a single friend as well who's looking for a partner... Pleaseeee". Your friend begged until you reluctantly agreed, how bad could it be if you faked a little interest during the dinner and then parted ways forever after?

You thought you could do this sacrifice for her but you couldn't imagine the dickhead that would be your "date". He introduced himself looking between your eyes and your tits, he talked about how he wanted a woman that could settle down giving up her career if she happened to have one, because "men and women should have specific roles in society, they should think about cleaning home and raising children" and complained about the difficulty of finding such women nowadays, to which you thought you had an idea why he was single. For the sake of your friendship you bit your tongue everytime he said something stupid and your friend would nudge you in the ribs to warn you.

She later apologized, saying she had no idea he would be such a moron, but that still left you bitter. If he wasn't the man of your life you could still find someone nice to spend lonely nights with, to satisfy you sexually at least, but he wasn't even worth sharing your name with in your opinion.

You huffed closing the door of your apartment and kicking off your heels. Your roommate, Yunho, said he was going out with friends that night so that meant you were home alone for a while. You called his name to make sure and waited in silence for a second, no response.

You strolled to the bathroom to take a nice shower and get ready for bed. When you finally layed in bed though you felt the need to steam off your frustration so you closed your eyes and dipped your hand inside your panties, starting to draw slow circles on your clit, your wetness soon starting to collect between your folds, helping in your task to get off. But it still wasn't enough so you reached for the drawer of your nightstand looking for your vibrator, still massaging your slick clit with the other hand. You found it right away and turned it on at a low setting, resting it on your swollen clit. You let out a whimper at the feeling, thanking the fact that Yunho was still out.

Yunho. He entered your mind in that moment. You actually always thought your roommate was attractive but never wanted to take the risk of ruining your relationship with him, it would be awkward if he turned you down. So you settled for simple glances whenever he showed some more skin or laying next to him on the sofa watching TV, gladly accepting his absentminded caresses on your calves or little innocent squeezes of his large hand on your thigh when you sat crosslegged next to him focused on some action movie. You actually thought Yunho was hot, with his deep but soft voice, his tall figure and broad shoulders, and his funny and sweet personality.

Your mind began spiralling with thoughts of Yunho and what you would do to him, setting the vibrator on a higher speed, little moans and whimpers slipping from your throat, until your orgasm washed over you, your thighs clasped together, short breaths leaving your mouth, your heart racing.

You took just the time to clean up and went to sleep feeling much lighter.

That night you dreamt about Yunho.

The next morning you were woken up by a knock on your bedroom door, Yunho's voice calling your name "Wake up, I brought breakfast from our favorite cafe" he sang from outside the door. You stretched, yawning and groggily getting up from bed, reaching for the door handle and pulling the door open. You were met with a broad chest in a lopsided oversize t-shirt and a sweet tight lipped smile on your roommate's face. You startled a little, making him laugh while he took your wrist and excorted you to the table where sat a cream filled pastry and a hot cappuccino waiting for you, along with his own breakfast.

"Sorry I scared you, I was just about to peer inside to check if you were still sleeping when you opened the door and found me there".

"It's ok, I'll let it slide this one time just because I really love this pastry" you joked before biting said pastry and taking a sip of cappuccino from your cup.

"Ahh thank you for your magnanimity" Yunho exaggerated his bow leaning with his forehead on the table and clasping his hands together above his head, at which you snorted, almost sending your chewed bite to the wrong side of your pipe.

"So how was your date?" he inquired while you gulped some water to make sure not to suffocate yourself.

"It went so bad I actually have no words, he was a real moron" you started, recalling the worst, most memorable sentences you had to hear the night before, Yunho reacting as theatrically as he could, seeing how much you were involved in your storytelling to try and lighten your mood and succeeding.

"When did you come back last night? I didn't hear you, maybe I was asleep" you asked wanting to change the topic of your conversation.

"Oh..." he hesitated, averting his eyes from your face, a light hue of pink tingeing his ears "I stayed home and played a bit on my PC, the guys cancelled our plans last minute."

You felt your blood draining from your face "Were... were you wearing your headset? You didn't hear me come home?" You tried to act nonchalant, like nothing happened in your room, looking casually inside your cup while sloshing the liquid around, missing the way Yunho gazed at you, a little smile threatening to manifest on his lips. "I did hear you come" he answered, his gaze finally locking with yours.

You tried to clear your throat and come up with something to say but suddenly you felt so self concious, your now red face and burning cheeks, your trembling voice, wide eyes, lip biting, how much did Yunho hear? Your brain short circuited, then Yunho said the least expected "Want me to help you next time?"

Did you hear that right? Was he serious? Was he trying to make fun of you? He liked to joke around, yeah, but he would never try to embarrass you like that, would he?

Seeing you struggle with whatever was going on in your head Yunho decided to make a move and rested his hand on yours on the table "Tell me if I'm wrong and we'll pretend like this conversation never happened if you want to, but I think I saw some signals from you all this time... And I honestly think you're hot and I was kinda jealous every time you went out for a date, and even more when you would send me a text telling me you were staying out the night and not to worry about you. I wished it were me you were spending those nights with." he confessed lowering his voice on the last part.

This couldn't be a joke, you were sure now, so you decided to be bolder and answer to his previous question with a question of your own "What if I told you I need your help right now?"

Yunho smirked standing up from his seat and approaching you, bending down to brush his lips on your ear while purring "I'll never deny you a helping hand."

Your lids fluttered closed while he carefully caressed your cheek. You followed the movement of his hand chasing it with your lips to softly kiss the tips of his fingers. Yunho took advantage of that movement to move his lips from your ear to tour jaw and to your neck, leaving a trail of feather like kisses, the little hairs on your neck standing up from the shivers that traveled down your spine, a little gasp escaping your mouth. He brought his hands to your waist, squeezing and pulling a little soliciting you to lift up. When you did he attached his lips to yours, inhaling your smell deeply through his nose. He started walking you backwards towards your bedroom, pulling and biting your bottom lip, slipping his tongue in your mouth. You weren't caught off guard though and took the opportunity to suckle on his tongue, sending a shiver directly to his cock, making him groan as he pressed you to your bedroom door. You could feel his boner rubbing on your hip while he fumbled with the door handle. You stumbled to your bed pulling Yunho down with you, still kissing and playing with his tongue. Your hands went to his hair on the back of his head, tangling your fingers in his dark locks and pushing him to deepen the kiss. When he pulled away for air he stood on his knees to get rid of his t-shirt and with your approval he helped you strip too, pulling up your pajama shirt and letting out a little gasp and a curse under his breath when he found out you weren't wearing a bra. He attacked your neck sucking and biting, while lightly grazing your breasts and nipples with one hand and pressing his knee between your legs, rubbing your clit and eliciting a moan from you.

"Do it again" he groaned, doing the same motion to earn another sound from you. He suddenly felt greedy, wanting to hear more sounds, so he made you lift your hips to remove your pants, being greeted by a wet patch staining your panties, sticking and outlining your pretty pussy, not leaving much to Yunho's imagination. He was in heaven, finally being able to be the source of your pleasure, if it depended on him you wouldn't have needed to get off on your vibrator anymore, he wanted to be the only reason for your beautiful moans. He buried his nose in your clothed pussy and nudged your clit, wanting to hear more of your sounds, pulling your panties to the side, slipping his fingers through your folds and experimentally pushing one digit inside. Your little moans turned to whimpers and sobs when he inserted a second finger and curled them up, hitting your sweet spot over and over again, his mouth latched to your clit, suckling.

"Yunho, stop teasing and fuck me already" you lamented.

"Wow, not even a 'please' or 'thank you', so rude" he chuckled but nonetheless he detached from you to get rid of his pants and boxers, freeing his hard erection. You ogled at it with big eyes, never having seen anything like that in real life, long, girthy, veiny, slightly curved up and already leaking precum, it looked delicious.

Yunho peeled your panties off, impatient to stuff your pussy with his cock when he remembered "Wait, I don't have a condom".

"I'm clean and on birth control" you reassured him, impatience taking the best of you.

"I'm clean too. So do I really get to fuck you raw?" he beamed.

"I'm waiting" you urged him, to which he launched himself on top of you, kissing and biting your neck, grinding his hips into yours, mixing your slick with his precum.

When he finally pushed inside he had to go slow because of his size, in order for you to adjust. Both of you groaning with every little push until he bottomed out, resting on top of you until you gave him permission to start moving. You were ecstatic, every time he thrusted back inside it felt like he filled you more and more, and his pace was just perfect, hard enough but not so much to hurt you, fucking you so good. You thought so until he lifted your legs hooking them in his elbows, his hands pressed to the mattress on your sides, pistoning in long, smooth motions, hitting your clit with his pelvis with every move, perfectly angled to reach your g-spot. That's when you felt like you were living an out of body experience, you were transcending reality.

Yunho tried to stay quiet in order to listen to your every grunt and moan, allowing himself to only let out little groans and huffs, until he felt your walls contracting again and again on his cock, splurting clear liquid around him and on the sheets, urging him to reach his own climax and making him come hard inside of you with a deep growl, spilling and spilling, pulsing and twitching until with a last roll of his hips he stilled, then finally let go of your legs, rolling off of you to collapse on your side, panting hard.

Both of you stayed like that for a minute, spent and sweaty, catching your breaths. You finally rolled on your side intertwining your legs with his, smiling up at him "I think I'll need your help pretty often from now on"

Yunho smiled back at you, kissing your nose "I was hoping for 'every day', but 'pretty often' is ok too."

[wincestdailyheadcanons]

"I think it would do you both good to see each other." Jack says, taking the half empty beer from Dean's hand. 

The smile on Dean's face brightens his features up so much he looked 20 years younger. 

"I get to go be with Sam?" Dean asks. "Finally?" 

Jack shakes his head. "Not yet. It isn't your time." 

Dean scowled, grabbing the bottleback, taking a drink; "Then fuck off. Until I get to be with him again, heaven, hell, wherever, dont you talk to me. It shouldve been me in that barn, not him, and you fucking know it." 

Dean kept his body from shaking, his voice even, but he knew that despite the dim lights of the no name bar, Jack would see the pain 

in his eyes. The hurt, and loneliness in his soul that shined through the green that only Sam had ever been 

able to fill. 

"There's many worlds, Dean." Jack 

said, this time sitting across from Dean. The gesture meaning to show not only empathy, 

but equality. In this moment, he wasnt a God. He was just a guy trying to comfort one of the only fathers he knew. 

"In this world, Sam died. In another you do, in one you go on a different hunt and nothing happens." Dean looked up; "So, youre taking 

me to see a different Sam?" 

Jack nodded; "He's elderly in this world. Time is-" 

Dean held up his hand; "I don't need to hear the mumbo jumbo about time and space, just take me to him." 

Dean blinked, and found himself outside a well maintained brick house with large trees, and a well kept yard. Inside he could hear 

yelling. 

Dean rushed in, moving quickly through the house, and in the living room found a tall man with white hair, and a beard. 

"Why are you in here?!" Sam screamed at a young woman. "I want my brother!" 

"Mr Winchester, I'm your nurse, Hannah, your son asked me to he-" 

Sam grabbed a glass off and raised his hand to throw it. 

"Sammy?" 

Sam instantly responded to Dean's voice, the glass slipping from his fingers, and shattering on the floor. 

"Dean?" Sam asked, stepping forward, his bare feet moving towards the broken shards of glass. His eyes locked with Dean's. Dean and the nurse moved to stop him. 

Dean pushed Sam back onto the couch, ignoring Sam's tears of joy at seeing him. "Missed you, missed you." Sam sobbed, clinging to Dean's Jacket. Dean looked down at his sleeve. Dads leather jacket. Dean caught his reflection in a mirror above the fireplace. He looked how he did in 2005. 

Sam cupped Dean's face pressing their foreheads together. "I wanna go hunting." 

Dean closed his eyes, and sighed, taking in the moment. He hadnt realized he had forgotten what Sam sounded like, how it felt to hear his name come out of Sam's mouth, 

forgotten what it felt like to be home again. 

"Okay, Sammy." Dean obviously wasnt going to take Sam on a hunt but still the lie that he was a family friend, Sam's son had asked to come over was believed easy enough by the nurse. 

For the next two days, Dean took care of Sam. Fed him, bathed him, walked around the yard with him. Mostly though, they just talked. 

Sam seemed to be confused about what year it was, he mentioned Stanford alot. That was probably why Jack had sent Dean like this. 

"You wanna go for a ride in the car?" Dean asked, having found the keys hidden in a drawer and Sam immediately lit up, nodding. 

Dean took Sam to an empty field, 

and watched the stars. Dean clinked their beer bottles together. Sam didnt even notice his was non alcoholic. He just smiled; "Cheers, jerk." 

"Cheers, bitch." 

That night, Dean helped Sam into bed. Something in his gut told him Sam's reaper wasn't far off. Dean pulled up a chair to sit by 

Sam, and held his hand, squeezing it gently. He understood why Jack had brought him here. In the barn, there had been no time to say goodbye. The attack had happened 

so fast, so violently, Dean didn't 

have a chance to say anything to Sam. 

This was his chance. Dean kissed Sam's wrist;, "I am so very proud of you, how strong, and smart you are. How you never took any of Dads crap.”

Sam's eyes softened, he looked so tired. Dean continued. "You've always kept fighting, and I know how hard that had to have been for you." Sam closed his eyes, starting to drift off into sleep, a soft smile on his face. "Love you, De." 

"I love you so much, my baby brother." 

After a bit, Dean laid Sam's hand down, and stood, walking towards the door to sleep on the couch. "Goodnight." Sam called gently. 

"Night, Sammy." 

The next morning, he left before Sam woke up, catching Sam's son, who he had learned shared a name with him at the front door.

"Take good care of him." Dean smiled, chuckling to himself at the young man's confusion. 

"Do-do I know you?" He asked. 

Dean shrugged, and walked down the sidewalk. 

Dean Jr walked inside, setting his bag down on the floor in his old bedroom, before going to his dads room. 

"Hey, Dad." He said pulling a chair up. "Your nurse just left. He seemed pretty cool.”

There was a small framed picture beside the bed of his dad when he was younger, beside him sat the uncle he knew, but never met. He 

picked up the frame, analyzing it then looked 

towards the door. There was no way, no possible way.- 

But they were both wearing the same necklace... 

"Do I know you?" He had asked the man. 

"My big brother came and visited me." Sam told him. "We drove in the Impala" He smiled, stroking the amulet around his neck. "It was fun.”

[heartpiratedrabbles]

Insecurities Part 3

Part 1 Part 2 ~ Part 4

Buggy X Fem Reader

The twins, were now 5 years old and you were still hanging around the same island. The only difference being you’ve made it your home base now. You changed your name to outsiders and started a show called ‘Zazel’s Dazzling Circus’ and it had drawn in quite a crowd, the past two years were filled with traveling with your group to other islands but always returned home after a week or two.

        The friends you made were delighted when you had told them you were staying and even when you moved out of Gin’s house, opting to live in the circus itself, he made sure you knew you were always welcomed back and that he’d always be willing to watch the boys. Even going as far as getting a bed for both of them whenever they’d spend the night.

        Throughout the years you had slowly let your appearance go back, no longer dying your hair, and wearing the revealing performance clothes again. You couldn’t be happier with how it was going. There were times when you’d look at your boys faces and be reminded of their father, missing him and wishing to contact him but you’d push the thoughts to the back of your head. You’d kept tabs on him throughout the years, keeping newspapers clippings and bounty posters, being proud of your former Captain every time he made the front page. You didn’t mean to make a scrap book of him, but overtime you had amassed enough too and thought it easier to hide a book over a box of loose papers.

        Gin recognized your kids features almost immediately but had never pushed you on the matter. He still took care of them when you were away and loved them as an uncle would. And he never told the kids of their father either, which you were thankful for. You’d tell them when they were older, or when they’d ask you about it, whichever came first you supposed. They didn’t seem to much care about not having a father figure, after all they had plenty of role models in their life.

Benji had perfected the art of knife throwing and pick-pocketing already, opting to be a little thief despite having everything he could want. Azure on the other hand had taken after you with his contortion and acrobatic skills, using them to distract people for Benji or to even squeeze in through open windows to steal. And as much as you wanted to raise them right, you couldn’t help but encourage their sneaky ways, also teaching them how to defend themselves in case things went awry. You were, after all, a pirate for most of your enjoyable life, and would rather them be prepared if they decided they wanted to go out to sea one day.

One of your favorite acts to watch from afar was when your two boys would freak strangers out who hadn’t known there were two of them. The shock value of one of them disappearing and the other appearing behind the stranger was perfect to rob them blind. Most of the time the people who so impressed and confused they wouldn’t even notice the missing items at all.

What’s more, your circus had brought some fame to the island and caused more travelers to visit and see the show. It brought you great pride in seeing how successful it had become. As the ringmaster and headliner, you were ecstatic at the applause each night and the berries you were raking in.

Another gig on a different island was coming up and this time you’d be traveling with the crew; your circus had grown enough to be in 2 places at once and you had trusted members who took care of the other act when you were away. Still though, the twins were too young and oblivious to bring to another island to wreak havoc on, so you left them with Gin who’d happily look after them. Using his time with them to teach them more about sailing and pirating.

As you were saying goodbye to your boys you had noticed Benji playing with face paint, curious you walked behind him to see what he was doing. But as you walked closer your mischievous son noticed and quickly hid a paper in the drawer of his vanity, “You can’t see yet!” He had yelled all flustered. Azure snickered behind him and made a comment of not being subtle at all.

“Well I’ll be back in a about a week, can you show me then?” Your curiosity getting the better of you. You son nodded and you smiled before he got up from his chair to join you in a hug Azure following suit. “I’ll miss you boys alright? Don’t forget that if you do do anything to not get caught.” They groaned in acceptance before you departed.

~~~

        Cabaji roamed the tent, fitting in perfectly with the people around him, A traveling circus had come to town and piqued his interest, they weren’t common Afterall and he’d like to see how this one worked. He hadn’t made the show itself but had gotten there just as people were leaving as the clean-up process unsued. Strangely enough he felt a sense of calm as the chaotic backstage seemed to run near the same way as Buggy’s own circus.

        “Hey, I haven’t seen you before. Why weren’t you at rehearsal?” A man approached him much to his dismay. “When did Mistress Zazel hire you?” He leaned in closer to Cabaji.

        “Oh, I was called here to audition and lost my way” He gestured to the unicycle he was carrying and the man sighed.

        “I’ve told her to schedule auditions at better times than right after shows but she never listens. Follow me, I’ll take you to the small performance tent” The man believed him easily and Cabaji seemed pleased with himself. He could meet this Zazel and perhaps talk to Buggy about how she runs her show to him.

~~~

        “Mistress Zazel another auditioneer is here for you. I put them in the normal tent,” Your stage manager Hendriks called out from behind the curtain, you were cleaning off the make-up and glitter on your face.

        You don’t remember scheduling an audition but it had been such a hectic arrival that you could see yourself telling someone in passing to come after the show. You sigh standing up, putting your mini top hat back as you walk towards the tent. Hendriks told you of how he was carrying a unicycle with him and seemed to already be in a costume. You did enjoy the enthusiastic people the most. As you open the curtain you look ahead of you to see the back of a familiar man, causing you to slam the curtain shut quickly.

        Hendriks looked at you quizzically as you peaked in again. The man in question had already started balancing on his singe tired bike as though it was as easy as walking and despite the years that had gone by you could tell it was him. Blood rushed out of your face as you turned back to your stage manager, “Tell him I’m sorry but that there are no spots open at the moment.” And you quickly walk away.

        Back in your own personal tent you start pacing, it had been years. Years. Why was a former crewmate here of all places? And asking for an audition? What was he up too? You take out your transponder snail to call Gin, “Gin someones here. I don’t know why but I’m worried he’s-“ You babbled out as fast as the speed of light.

        “Y/N calm down. What wrong? Who is there?” Gin interrupted you and as you tried to catch your breath he continued, “…Is it Buggy?”

        That seems to hitch your breath again, you hadn’t even thought about the whereabouts of your former captain, “I. I don’t know. Cabaji is here though and I’m worried. I left on such awful terms” You were starting to panic, sitting down only to stand back up again.

~~~

        Cabaji sighed, his plan had failed and he was sent away. The man didn’t escort him out though so he had decided to take the scenic route and look around. As he continued he heard an oddly familiar voice and went to investigate. “Y/N why don’t you just cut the trip short, have Xavier fill in for you-“ The voice was clearly from a transponder snail but was more interesting was the name used. Did you truly run away to another circus? Buggy would be intrigued.

        Deciding to not get ahead of himself he listened in more, and your voice, a tad tired and more worried had reverberated through his head. This had to be you. He had to tell Buggy as soon as possible. Although he hadn’t seen your name in the program so it was clear you went under a different name now adays.

        “I’m going to the show tomorrow to confirm it captain.” The blue-haired clown had nearly screamed when he heard the news and promised he’d be there in no more than 3 days. “She might be leaving so at the very least I can see what her alias is based on who this Xavier plays tomorrow.” It was the happiest he had heard his captain in a while.

        “I’m stopping at a port tomorrow before heading to where you are. Update me the second you think she’s somewhere else, it’s the closest we’ve come to finding my doll” His captain had cooed out. The past five years had been weirdly restless, traveling and conquering areas that made the world government fear Buggy, but little did they know it was all in pursuit of a single person.

~~~

        The next morning Gin had gathered the boys to tell them that their mom was coming home early, it wasn’t unheard of but it didn’t happen often either. “Was she run out of town?” “Did she start a fight?” “Is this like the time she set fire to a bar?” The questions poured in and Gin pushed them off as much as possible.

        “Why don’t you get your mother something nice before she arrives? She should be getting back sometime tonight or early tomorrow,” Gin knew they wouldn’t buy something, instead opting to steal from a rich person, but as long as they didn’t get caught it didn’t matter, and with Azure’s planning skills and Benji’s knife skills, he wasn’t too worried about the boys as they ran off to scope out the area.

Gin was a little worried of how’d you react when you come home to find Benji’s poorly copied version of Buggy’s face paint, but decided to add more to your plate when there was nothing he could do. He did warn the boy to wash his face before you arrived though. Benji, on the other hand, had known you wouldn’t be too happy to see him in this face paint. Despite your efforts at hiding it the boys had seen you look at a wanted poster, sometimes crying, and Benji being a snoop, had nabbed one of the posters and immediately loved who he saw.

Azure did make fun of him this morning for how sloppy it looks, but for a first attempt at the full look he was quite happy about it. Azure deciding a much more subtle look of a ponytail with a small hat, and a scarf covering his face. He wasn’t ashamed of his nose, but it was much easier to hide from unwanted attention when the most obvious part of his appearance was hidden. Now though, it was time to find a present. Azure deicing to scour out the new arrivals of boats as Benji took to the crowd immediately, stealing petty berries as he got closer to the dock.

The people who called the town and port their home weren’t surprised to see either of the boys snooping around, and no one tried to stop them from swindling strangers either, sometimes even going as far as to cover for the boys if a particularly angry person didn’t enjoy there disappearing act.

Benji stopped in an alleyway, rummaging through his bag to look at the score so far when he saw his brother out the corner of his eye. “An interesting ship arrived just now, we should check it out” Azure hinted, this could only mean 1 of two things, a rich passenger ship had come through, or a weird ship that was out of normal had made it’s way to the dock. Benji nodded and shooed Azure to make a distraction.

        He turned the corner and hid behind a barrel near the ship he was certain Azure was talking about. A large circus tent was on the main deck that memorized both boys for a second before they got back to work. Another circus coming to town? The pride of the act and the anger of stolen spotlight mixed as both boys thought the same thing, steal from the first person to walk of the boat.

        Even if they wanted to explore another realm, they knew better than to get on any ship for any reason. The chances of being whisked away or caught skyrocketing when they were no longer on their home ground. As they waited, a man got off the boat wearing a captain’s hat and a large fur coat. This was it. Benji couldn’t get a good look at the mans face but there would be no need. Azure cause a small harmless explosion further down the dock, causing people to look and walk towards the area, and just as expected the man followed suit.

        Benji, taking the opportunity ran and ‘bumped’ into the stranger grabbing a rather large coin purse in the act. He was a few paces away when he turned back to bow his head as a fake apology when he froze. The face of the man had looked exactly like that of the poster, although a bit older than the version he had.

        Azure seem to have noticed his brother and started making his way through the crowd yelling his name. Hearing his name be shouted he realized his mistake and quickly started to go further, but the man had already spotted him. Despite being so far away he felt a tug on his unruly hair, “Where do you think you’re goin brat?” The captain had barked out, not amused in the slightest, “You makin fun of me with that awful getup?” Benji cried out at the slight pain and quickly grabbed a dagger, opting to cut his hair from the disembodied hand as his brother grabbed his arm and darted through the crowd.

        They could both hear the shouts of the man behind him but thankfully the people of the port had decided to try and hide the boys, a bookshop keep ushering them into the back room until the coast was clear.

~~~

        “What’s up your ass?” Alvida quipped as the clown angrily walked by.

        “Some brats makin fun of my look. One of ‘em even wore a wig and did an atrocious job my make-up on their grubby face” Buggy sat down opening a bottle.

        “You sure that’s not just because there’s a circus on this island? Coulda been admirers” She sipped on her own wine leaning back.

        “Sure, if you count them also stealing some money. The one kid came outta nowhere to save the stupid twerp too, they even cut their wig just to get away from me,” A huff, “And don’t get me started on that stupid fake nose he wore.”

        “Well I’m not condoning beating up kids, but if you want revenge your best bet would be going to the show and lookin for them there.”

~~~

        “He looked just like the man in the poster!” Benji and Azure were arguing on just who the man was. The blue hair looked a little too similar for Azure’s taste and the nose was already a telling feature.

        “I swear the man in the picture isn’t just a clown what if he’s-“ They both shut up when they hear the door creak open, “Hi Uncle Gin!” Benji quickly slides the poster under a bed and looks up at the man.

        “Should I ask what happened to your hair?” A rather large chunk was missing, making the uneven cut all the more noticeable, “Your mother won’t be too happy with me about it.”

        “We didn’t get in trouble if that’s what your asking,” Benji grinned up, ignoring the warning glance from Gin, “Well it was a quick escape. They didn’t get us though see!” The boy stood up, pulling his brother with him, and did a twirl to show no injuries on his body. Azure slowly also twirling around.

        Gin smiled, it was times like this where he was reminded they were still just small children, “Uh-huh, as long as you’re both safe. “How bout you two stay in for the night and wait for your mom?” The question was innocent enough but Gin had heard a bit of their conversation and didn’t want to risk anything. “And remember to wash your face Benji.”

~~~

        “Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to Zazel’s Dazzling Circus! Due to an emergency I’ll be filling in for our wonderful Zazel-“ Cabaji looked up amused, he hadn’t expected this. This Xavier fella was front and center starting the show himself instead of the normal Ringmaster.

        He wondered slightly if it was a mistake, if Xavier was filling in for more than one act, but it quickly became apparent that his only role for the night was ring master, and that the big show of the dangerous trapeze had been opted for a different act to suit his skills. So our little Y/N started a circus of her own huh? Buggy will certainly be ecstatic over this.

        After the show he got ahold of Alvida, Buggy decidedly off in his own world, “Yea he’s checking out this circus in town, what do you want?” She barked out impatient.

        “I thought I’d let him Captain know of Y/N Alias” He heard Alvida knock a few things over.

        “How are you sure it’s her?” After explaining the situation even Alvida was getting giddy over seeing her friend again, “Well spit it out Cabaji, what’s the name?”

        “Zazel-“

        “Like Zazel’s Dazzling Circus?” Alvida interrupted him quickly standing up at the news, after a quick confirmation she was beaming.

~~~

        Buggy was wandering the circus for any signs of the brats from earlier huffing a bit. This place seemed like a paradise, freaks walking everywhere and different acts happening constantly in different tents, a main tent for the main show once or twice a night. Some people were whispering while glancing his way and Buggy just seemed as though it was people recognizing his greatness.

        After wandering for a while, he stops in front of a booth where a man is organizing shelves, Not bothering to look at Buggy he calls out, “You can buy tickets for the main act 6 tents down from here.” He nods his head in a direction ignoring the clown behind him entirely.

“I’m not here for that. Is there a brat with blue hair red nose parading around?” Buggy huffs out, a little annoyed at the disrespect.

        “Ah you’re probably lookin for the twins. I don’t think they’re here tonight but if they are they’d be in a practice tent or around the main acts for the night.” The man didn’t even bother looking over his shoulder as he answered, Benji and Azure got in enough trouble that it was just common ground to reveal where they were at the circus. Besides this was their home turf, no one would dare cause trouble to them here.

        Buggy mutters a thanks while walking away, twins huh? Heading towards what he believed to be the rehearsal/practice tents. Searching around, not bothering to ask again. If they weren’t here for the afternoon, it wouldn’t do much to keep asking, but it is a good idea to scope out the area.

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

Hello!! I love your Carmy fics and (if you are still taking requests) I would love to see anything fluffy with him! Maybe like a late night up with him or literally anything!

This is completely different. It's giving more like first time meeting slash cute cuteness but I hope it's still something...

Chicago rain

Carmen wasn't a lady man. The anxiety that crippled him made any interaction awkward and robot-like at times. Hence why he practically always avoided any outing. Too many stimulations. Too little capacity in his brain to deal with it all.

But then you had walked into the Bear one day. The weather in Chicago was brutal. The wet spell was without doubt trying to drown the city at this point. Carmy was busy in the kitchen. It was past the breakfast rush but still a good chunk of time till the madness of lunchtime hit. So everything seemed slow. The pre-prep that was done last night allowed everyone to take a needed breather. Carmen heard voices from the front. Surprisingly Richie's voice didn't sound bitchy. A laughter echoed and the door to the kitchen quickly opened.

"I need one of our best sellers and someone to start a big cup of tea", Carmy frowned slightly, no one ordered tea here. "Cousin, do we have towels without holes in them?", Richie raked through the drawers, making a mess of a somewhat organized place. "Man put that back as it was, I'll grab one for the back", Carmen huffed as he walked towards his office. "Bring it out front", Richie called from behind him.

If only he had known. If only he had known that his heart was going to leap out of his chest the moment he brought that stupid tower out, he would have done a double take. Here you were, drenched to the last fiber of your skin. Shivering so hard Carmen could practically feel his own teeth aching from the friction. "Shit", he muttered under his breath, your big eyes darted up to meet him. You two stilled a bit yet your composure came back way quicker. "Sorry, I'll clean the floor, I know I left quite a...", but your rant was cut with Carmen stepping forward as he wrapped the towel around your shoulders. "Forget about it", he said, "It's nothing, Richie will take care of it".

Your cold fingers brushed over Carmen's warm hands and he practically let out a hiss at how cold you felt. His brain was working so fast that he didn't even realize it as he said, "Come over to the back. I have spare clothes you can change into". You looked back at him, shaking your head, "It's all okay, I'll grab a cup and will head out", you pointed to the absolute miserable weather outside. You both looked at it for a while before you huffed, "Yeah, I probably won't go out...", your voice died down. "Then, after you", Carmen gestured towards the kitchen and this time you didn't fight it.

You were pretty much drowning in Carmen's hoodie but the warmth of it was much appreciated. Carmen as you had learned along the way had prepared a full three-course meal. Pouring second of the soup. "My brother used to say that it warmed both the body and the soul", you smiled at that, especially when Carmen had sat to eat beside you. You watched him work after that. The rush of the kitchen. The shouting. The clacking of the pans. The smells. It all felt like a dance of some sort. A rhythm that was so easy to get lost in. You watched it till your eyes grew heavy and sleep pulled you in.

Carmen had felt your eyes on him all night. But oddly enough they didn't make him feel uneasy. Quite the opposite. He wanted to carry himself higher. Show off the place. The things he did best. By the time he pulled enough courage to look back at you, he had found you sleeping with your head resting on his office desk. Even in the midst of the chaos he had stepped out. Quickly whipping his damp hands before he took a proper look at you.

Never had Carmen seen a girl so pretty in his life. Rarely did any girl awaken any reaction in him. But there was something about you. Something that called out to him. Carmen gently ran his hand up and down your arm, making you flinch as you quickly sat up. Nearly falling over with the chair.

"God, sorry, fuck", you steadied yourself, Carmen's hand falling over your shoulders. He met your tired eyes, smiling softly, "Why don't you lay down", he nodded towards the little couch. It wasn't anything fancy, but it did the job. "No, I've caused too much trouble already", you muttered but Carmen shook his head. "Nap for a bit, we should close in a couple of hours. I'll drive you home then", he offered, getting drawn in by your eyes once more. You quickly tucked your hair behind your ear, "I will never repay you for all of this", you mumbled. Carmen shrugged his shoulders, suddenly feeling bold, "Have dinner with me sometime. If you want, of course... you can say no. I would understand and it's...", he ranted on. You reached to touch his hand and his movements stalled, "I'd like that", you muttered, feeling your cheeks growing crimson. Carmy only nodded before once again motioning you towards the sofa.

You followed his lead, tucking your legs towards your chest for more warmth. Carmen quickly looked around, reaching for his big blazer as he carefully draped it over your frame. You smiled up at him and he was quick to follow your lead especially when a yawn slipped past your lips. He watched you for a moment. Tucking the image of you deep into his brain before he slowly turned around, carefully closing the door behind him as the chaos of the kitchen sucked him right back into action. Yet the feeling of something good looming right behind these closed doors didn't leave him all evening long.

[f4riedimples]

MY COLLECTION

pairings: pimp!sam carpenter x f!reader

warnings: mentions of drugs,underage drinking,sexual harassment ,provocation dancing, prostitution

wc: 1241

a/n: hi everyone, just wanted to finally come back since I’ve only been active on wattpad recently. Hope it’s not too bad!

Oh.

this has to be the worst mistake of your life.

like your whole fucking life. You knew this was a bad idea but you loved Sam so you did it anyways. It took some time convincing but you caved.

you don’t even know why she wanted to start doing this. You were only dancing but even that made you feel a certain type of way because of the way it went.

Sam would invite people over, get them tipsy, get you and the “client” in the room, you would dance, get paid, and that was that.

you didn’t complain since it would bring in a lot of income a week.

On the fourth day you made just 950 dollars in two hours. And it just kept increasing from there. But this didn’t seem worth it anymore.

it all started just a few nights ago. Sam told you who you would take to the room and dance for and that was supposed to be it.

afterwards though you saw the creepy state the guy was giving you. After he paid all his money he tried to grab you but your waist and sit you on the bed.

you immediately got up not feeling comfortable. “No touching, nothing further.” You replied calmly before trying to move past the man and check your earnings.

The dance was quite short but he still paid around 300-400. “Take off your clothes.” He order as he looked you up and down.

you almost froze up in shock and disgust. You knew this would probably happen sooner or later. “That’s not my job.” You denied with a small bit of attitude.

“I’ll give you five dollars, just take your clothes off and fuck me!” He demanded impatiently assuming your it was part of your job or you should go further instead of just selling the fantasy.

“sir, like I said, that’s not my goddamn job.” You didn’t want to raise your voice since this wasn’t a regular. You never know what this man could pull out of do.

Things were getting too intense too fast and you just needed it to stop. As the man tried to get near you again you just wanted to grab the knife hidden in one of the drawers.

just as he was about to reach you, you heard a small bang on the door. “Open. Now.” It was Sam. It was Sam! You immediately ran to the door and unlocked it.

just so no one could sneak in and try to get a free dance with friends, it was a responsibility to lock the door.

Sam immediately came in and glared at the man. “What the hell happened?” She asked already seething. She had heard some of this from outside of the door.

“she won’t fuck me.” The man tried to stay confident even though he knew Sam would be pissed off.

“asshole, she’s a dancer, not sex worker.” Sam hissed before guiding you behind her. It made you feel a bit safer knowing Sam had did something and was here to help you now.

“get out.” Sam said and the man had no choice but to leave. After this Sam immediately stopped the party and everyone went home.

she sat you on the bed and lightly caressed your cheek with her thumb. “princesa, I’m so sorry. Did he hurt you?” Sam asked feeling guilty.

you shook your head only feeling a bit shook up. “No, he didn’t. Thanks for saving me.” You whispered a bit down by the experience.

“There’s no need to thank me. I’ll always protect you from weirdos like that.” She spoke softly before hugging you. You couldn’t help but tear up.

now however you were worried things would be different.

it had been around a month since the whole incident and you were Sam were out on a date. Sam had brought up the idea of bringing in another girl which made you feel a bit jealous.

you never knew if Sam could try to find interest in a new girl. Even though you knew she was joking you couldn’t shake off another feeling you had towards the idea. Fear. Or maybe guilt.

You knew Sam would probably bring in another really young girl desperate for money who wouldn’t know how dangerous this was until it was too late. You couldn’t imagine what could happen.

you couldn’t imagine someone else go through what you did or worse while you stand by participating.

that’s why you had to tell Sam what was on your mind. “Hey Sam? We need to talk about something serious.” you were gonna be open and hope for the better.

Sam immediately got serious and paid close attention. She stare at you still with her usual caring eyes as she waited for you to speak.

“I don’t think I wanna do this. Not anymore or ever again. This whole pimp and dancer thing is just not for me.” Even before you had agreed to do this you knew that even actual strippers or dancers can usually be followed home or harassed by creepy guys.

you knew that some men and other woman felt entitled to seeing more even if that wasn’t on the fine print.

Sam took a tense breath before shooting back. “Are you serious? Like- are you sure that you wanna do this?” Sam was cautious and hesitant not wanting to seem insensitive. She also knew this could lead to lots of troubles.

she tried to respect you and what you wanted. She tried not to be so blinded by the money. At the end of the day you were still her girlfriend.

“yes.” Your voice was soft and you almost felt bad. You didn’t want to disappoint Sam but you also wanted to put yourself first.

“then okay. That’s how it’ll go. I’m just surprised because you seemed to enjoy it especially when the nights were late.” Something about Sam’s last sentence caught you off guard.

on late nights you would decide to get a little extra tipsy to loosen up your nerves but not because you wanted to do more with these clients. “Excuse me?”

“you just seemed to really like it. You never complained.” Sam spoke a bit more quietly as if she was nervous to say. She started to realize maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

“you’re the one who asked me to do this. I could’ve said no but I didn’t because ends needed to be met and I loved you.” Sam was the one who had offered you this after seeing you give her a lap dance.

she realized how good you were naturally and decided that maybe she shouldn’t “let your talent go to waste”.

before this you never consider Sam would ever even have an idea like this. She would tell you how you would deserve the best but right now it didn’t feel the same.

You’ve been dating each other for around a year and known each other for way longer. how could this be your girlfriend.

“I know. And I’m sorry. I was selfish and was desperate to pay the rent and the bills and get more than cheap food.” You let out a soft breath as your nerves temporarily calmed down.

you reached out and held Sam’s hand. “And I forgive you.” You smiled sweetly before pressing a soft kiss against Sam’s lips.

but will things fall back in place?

[playername-player-of-games]

More of @chrisrin‘s gemcyt au :D part 2 to this!

//

Earth is…different.

It’s been raining for three days, (at least that’s what Etho called it, back when they landed). Three days of rain, no light from this system’s sun. Outside is reflecting how he feels inside, gray and storming and he’s-

He’s never going to see his diamond again.

It’s fine. That’s fine. He doesn’t think about it. He can’t think about it, not when it makes him feel like he’s raining.

He’s thinking about it.

She was beautiful, graceful- let him speak and laughed at his jokes. She complimented his fighting, thanked him when he helped her with even the smallest things- things he shouldn’t have been thanked for, in all honesty, like opening doors, or turning off the lights.

Stars, he’s really never going to see her again.

He curls further into himself. He’d reformed with a hooded cloak this time, the desire to hide manifesting physically as soon as he’d Reformed on the ship. He’d had to Reform twice, the first he did himself, without Etho saying he could. He’d been poofed immediately and whisked back into a drawer for what felt like centuries.

After they made it outside, he was allowed to Reform after the ship took off again. Etho said his hair turned black.

He doesn’t know what Etho’s talking about. He can see it, when he looks up at his fringe. It’s a darker green now.

It doesn’t matter. He’s never going to see his diamond again.

“Pearl?” Etho sing songs, footsteps crunching across the dirt of the kindergarten, “Peaaarl, you in here?”

Pearl stuck himself into one of the many gem-shaped holes in the wall, pressed as far back as he could manage, grateful his cloak is dark enough to blend in with the walls, “Go away, Etho.”

“I brought some friends,” Etho says, his face popping into view as he leans over the opening, setting down an oil lamp to light up the space, “you up for some chitchat?”

Pearl tugs his hood down. “Not really.”

“They’re nice, I promise,” Etho assures him, “they’re some of Impulse’s friends! Impulse was nice, right?”

“I guess.”

Impulse was nice, Etho’s right. Their little tour of Earth’s Gem Base had been brief but informative, with a few landmarks. Impulse’s forge. A warp pad. A crash site. Then Pearl got overwhelmed and ran, warping at random and landing in a kindergarten. Nobody came after him.

Until now.

“Do you wanna come out?” Etho asks.

“Not really.”

Etho laughs, “fair enough,” and disappears.

New footsteps- Pearl catches a flash of green and blue outside.

“I brought an aquamarine and a peridot,” Etho explains, voice louder now that he’s further away from the opening, “Grian and Mumbo. They want to talk to you about stuff.”

“Goodie.”

Etho bids him goodbye, and leaves. Then the aquamarine pushes his way into the hole, with a wide, one-eyed grin. There’s more than enough room for the two of them and all the rain water he’s bringing in here, but Pearl curls further into himself anyway.

“You’re Pink Diamond’s pearl,” remarks the aquamarine.

Pearl bristles, “I was Pink Diamond’s pearl.”

The aquamarine waves him off, “specifics don’t matter. All that matters is whether or not you’d like to overthrow the diamonds.”

Pearl freezes.

“Grian!” The peridot- Mumbo- scolds, “you can’t just say that!”

“Well, why not?” Grian turns around, his wings nearly whacking Pearl in the face, “it’s not like he can say no, if he goes back to Homeworld he’ll be shattered.”

They dissolve into bickering. Pearl doesn’t care. He can’t hear them.

Overthrow the diamonds.

It’s treason. Rebellion. He’s suddenly connecting dots he didn’t realize were there- the crash site. A hidden warp pad. So, so many mismatched gems living together in an uncharted, unregulated base. Not being allowed to Reform on the ship.

Oh stars- what has he gotten himself into?

The aquamarine yelps and disappears with a poof- Mumbo catches him, flustered when Pearl rushes past him, sword in hand, back to the warp pad, back to the warp, to warp, warp warp warp warp warp-

A blinding flash of light- he stumbles off the pad and falls to his knees.

Rebellion. Treason.

If he goes back to Homeworld, he’ll be shattered.

He’s being shattered right now, he thinks- that’s the only way he can think to explain this feeling. He’s being crushed, turned inside out, trying to reform in a place that’s too small. He shouldn’t be here- he’s raining- he should have stayed on Homeworld, should have let himself be-

Someone is humming.

He freezes. He’s good at this- disappearing into the background. He’s nothing. An accessory, a set piece.

He lifts his head.

They’re hovering over a lake (he hadn’t realized he’d warped to a lake), twisting in a way that looks like a dance, something bright and cloud-like in their arms. Something about their posture is familiar- friendly. Pearl pushes himself to his feet- his knees trembling, and forces himself forward.

One foot in front of the other. He makes out features- wings made of water. A bouquet of roses and sunflowers and little red things. Too big to be an aquamarine- a lapis? His gem a little to the left of where Pearl’s is, on his chest, right over where a human heart would be.

His humming has turned to singing. Pearl stops on the bank- he knows this lapis. This was one of the messengers, they used to talk all the time.

What is he doing on Earth?

The lapis bends over, dropping petals into the water, and notices Pearl with barely more than a glance.

“Oh, hello! You’re n-” he does a double take, eyes wide, his smile fond and familiar as if he remembers Pearl too, “you’re Pink Diamond’s pearl!”

This is the same lapis. The one he used to tease and trip in the hallways. They’d salute to each other- then to their diamond- then drop form and laugh. They made jokes- they called each other names and playful insults and make faces at each other when the diamonds weren’t looking. This lapis is- is like home, even after he disappeared for a hundred years without explanation- and he’s here right in front of him. Pearl feels like he’s being shattered all over again.

“Was,” he corrects, “I was Pink Diamond’s pearl.”

Lapis comes to hover in front of him, holding his bouquet. Pearl does not meet his eyes.

“What do you mean?”

“I uhm-” Pearl pulls his hood down over his eyes, “I fused with her.”

“Oh.”

Raindrops drip down his cheeks- he reaches up to wipe them away, turns his head to the sky and wonders how they’re getting on him if his hood is up. The sky is clear. Lapis lands in front of him, wings disappearing, his mouth a worried line.

“Why is it raining on my face?” Pearl whispers.

Lapis smiles, quiet, warm, and gently pulls Pearl’s hood down to rest on his shoulders, “you’re crying.”

Pearl sniffles, “what does that mean?”

“It means your eyes are making rain on your face,” he explains, still gentle. He tucks a little yellow rose over Pearl’s ear.

“How do I make it stop?”

“It’ll stop on its own, eventually.”

Pearl wipes his eyes on his sleeves. He feels exposed without his hood.

“Lapis-“

“Jimmy.”

Pearl makes a face, “what?”

“My name is Jimmy.”

Pearl scoffs, furiously wiping his eyes again, “what is with you Earth gems and your weird names.”

Jimmy laughs, moving to sit next to Pearl and tugging him down with him, “who have you met?”

“Impulse,” Pearl says, “which sounds dumb, and Mumbo, which sounds dumber, and Grian which sounds like grain!”

Jimmy laughs and nods again, “that’s us.”

“Stupid,” Pearl snaps. He needs his eyes to stop raining now.

“Would you like an earth name?” Jimmy asks, and Pearl scoffs at him again.

His first thought is no, he doesn’t want one. But then he remembers treason, and he remembers rebellion, and he remembers that he’ll be shattered if he goes back to Homeworld, and he thinks of making fun of long winded messages from important gems and making faces at each other behind the Diamond’s backs.

Surely naming himself isn’t the worst thing he’s ever done.

“Maybe.”

“Go on then,” Jimmy says, nudging him with his shoulder. “There’s lots of things to choose from.”

And there are a lot of things to choose from.

He likes the J from Jimmy’s name- it’s a good sounds- he just doesn’t know what comes after it. He looks around for inspiration. Jake isnt right. Jloud sounds weird, and so does Jeaf.

He takes a rose from Jimmy’s bouquet and twirls it around in his fingers- he can’t name himself Jasper, even though he’s off color he wouldn’t ever name himself after another gem. He can’t call himself Jimmy either, because then he’d be naming himself Pearl all over again and that’d just lead to problems.

He thinks further back- Impulse was showing him something at camp. Barrels of something called oil- the stuff in the lamp. Stuff for cooking. It’s stuff that helps other stuff work like it’s supposed to. He figures that’s a good a thing as any.

“Joil.”

“Joil?” Jimmy dissolves into laughter.

“Wha- hey, it’s not like it’s better than Jimmy!”

“No, no, it’s worse!”

Pearl growls at him, trying to be upset, but the way Jimmy is doubled over, cracking up, makes it hard to keep a smile off his face.

“Oh-kay, it’s bad,” he admits, trying and failing in the not laughing department, “but do you have a better idea, oh great Jim?”

“Maybe,” Jimmy straightens, smiling wide, “‘Joil’s’ a bit awkward to say, is all. Why not try Joel?”

He’s gotta admit that is easier to say.

“That’s fine,” Joel says. “You can call me that.”

“Well then, it’s nice to meet you, Joel,” Jimmy says, ever smiling, “welcome to Earth.”

[underthecrazy20]

Always with you ~ Yang Jungwon

Genre: Vampire!au, Soulmate!au, fluff, angst.

Warnings: Asylum esk themes, blood and some horror esk moments.

W/c: 4k

A/n: None of the actions/personalities portray any of Enhypen in real life. It's just for entertainment purposes.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You sat in the window seat of your room in the orphanage, reading a book on animals of all kinds. The stuffed animals were perched along the ledge as well as on your rocking chair and the bed. They were the selected few the orphanage caretakers provided to keep you entertained, even though you were 'almost' eighteen, you wanted to keep them with you. A wardrobe stood up on the north wall–the same as the bed–at the foot of the bed frame. In the corner your body faced, was a cabinet with drawers and a few unimportant dusty objects that were on top. A simple faded green circle rug sat in the middle of the wooden floor with books of all kinds laid out open to the crisp air. Your plain light blue dress was spread out around your legs keeping your pale skin covered, and your waist long hair was pinned back nicely in its normal half up half down style you were always instructed to wear. 

     A gentle breeze came over you through the crack of the opened glass pane window, causing you to look down at the big front yard. Other kids played with outdoor games or dolls in the grass under the great oak trees; but you stayed inside in your personal assigned room for two reasons: one, the kids were frightened of the cold behavior you possessed around them and two, you were a vampire and was afraid they would be suspicious of how you did not behave like them. But you, out of everyone who stayed in the orphanage, only knew of your dark secret and had been determined to keep it that way. The sun was blocked behind the gloomy sky in the afternoon sky as the day went on; today was the day that no one had to go to the medical room for a check up. 

     The rain stopped thirty minutes ago, allowing the kids to play outside. Most kids that arrived here were sick and went under special treatments. But rumor has it that the treatments didn't turn into anything else but death. The caretakers favored treating you because of your dead like appearance and no matter what they put into you it would never make a difference. Of course you knew exactly why and the caretakers were slowly beginning to exploit what you were with each test. Something they injected into your neck did weaken you for a few minutes and made you lethargic which you did not like. But because you were a vampire you came back to your senses quickly and the caretakers would act as if nothing happened and that you were healthy.  Not really fitting in and being the weird freak out of the bunch of kids that come and go here was beginning to feel stressful without anyone to relate to in this place. 

Your abilities are to speak with any type of animal as well as take control of their mind and body. You tried your best to hide your gift as it previously caused trouble and damage to you back at the old orphanage you stayed at.

~Back at the previous orphanage~ 

     Outside near the kitchen side of the building, hidden in the forest trees, you hunted for your next meal. All the other kids could eat freely with each other, while you took your food that the kitchen maids prepared for you to the woods where you could properly dispose of it and eat your kind of food. When you had gotten a rabbit to eat, one of the newcomers that arrived two days ago took interest in you and secretly followed you into the forest without you knowing. He didn’t find anything suspicious until you turned around freezing in place.  Finding him standing a few feet behind you brought panic into your mind. Jungwon, who was also a vampire, was not surprised or scared like you had thought he would be. He only told you to be careful of how you hunted and then left without another word. But you ignored his warning and continued to live the way you wanted, Jungwon being with you every step you dared to take.

   >>>

     The forest was beginning to become dusk as you walked back to the orphanage after drinking your third animal that day. As you stepped over a fallen log, a sudden twig snapped behind you. Pausing, you stayed still using your hearing to detect anyone around. After a few seconds of waiting, you heard nothing happening, so you continued to walk on. But not even taking two steps forward, a hand catches your wrist turning you around mid-step. You were then standing face to face with Jungwon. He was holding his index finger up to his lips to tell you to be quiet. Your defense cleared your mind once you figured out it was him who grabbed you. 

"What are you doing out here at this hour?!" he whisper-shouted. You huffed pulling away from his strong grip. 

"Eating," you replied, with a shrug. He sighed in frustration, glancing at the forest cautiously. 

"If you don’t be careful someone will notice," he warned you. You rolled your eyes and began to walk again in the direction of the orphanage. 

"I will be fine, you worry too much Wonnie," you teased him. He caught up with you and grabbed your hand. 

"I worry because I care about you," he explained, sternly. “Do you remember what I told you that day by the pond?” Jungwon asked you. You sighed, turning to face him.

“We will protect each other for eternity,” you recited to him. He nodded, bringing his hand up to brush your hair behind your ear.

“I meant it, I want you to be safe, okay?” he spoke gently.

You smiled with a short nod and gave him a sweet kiss on his lips. Then continued to walk with him to the edge of the forest where you both could see the big stone house. You both walked up the side of the building rounding the corner to the front door. Reaching the great double doors, he stopped you from continuing into the orphanage.

"I love you, you know that right?" he asked in a whisper. So that any prying ears didn’t hear.

“I love you too,” you whispered back, giving his hand a squeeze.

     Jungwon and you connected immediately after your first encounter, it did take a few days to talk to each other after the incident in the forest, but you two were inseparable after that. You both did everything together in secret to avoid suspicion. Jungwon was caring, protective, and loyal to you. He was your best friend and soulmate, the very strong bond was growing the more you two were around each other. It would be unbreakable soon enough.

     Unfortunately the bond went to ruins in a matter of hours, the next morning very early when the days began to stay dark longer. You were in the upstairs living room reading a book by the fireplace using the light to see the words on the pages. Some footsteps brought you out of the world of ink. Before you could process any action, you were grabbed by two males that were much bigger than you, they pulled you up and dragged you down the stairs. You did not dare to make a sound as the other kids were fast asleep. The men took you outside down the dirt path to the front of the gate to a wagon that was parked close to the road. 

     The dawn was still far from peeking over the horizon, the only light was the lanterns on the wagon. All the while in the distance stood the headmistress who watched you be taken away with relief. The wood scraped your back at the force they used to hall you up into the wagon. Taking one last glance at the house, fear and pain filled your heart as you realized Jungwon didn’t know you were being taken. He would be so worried and heartbroken. You can’t just leave him.

“Jungwon!!” you suddenly shouted out, startling the men in the wagon. They quickly silenced you before you could call once more. As the world around you went dark and the sound and movement of the wagon began to drive away from the orphanage leaving your heart clenched in pain. Your bond ached for the presence of your soulmate.

     In the later morning, Jungwon made his way through the whole house trying to find you, the confusion and fear blocking his mind was making him dizzy. As he entered the family room, he noticed a book turned over on the floor next to the fireplace. He came up to the book and picked it up, finding that it was the same one you had been reading. 

“They took her early this morning,” a soft voice spoke behind him. Jungwon looked over his shoulder seeing a boy with black hair and pale skin around his age standing in the doorway holding a teddy bear. His name was Sunoo.

“Who took her?” he asked, he could feel his own eyes turn at the thought of someone hurting you. Sunoo shrugged.

“Someone, who doesn’t like vampires,” he responded. Jungwon stood up rushing up to him, getting up in his face.

“What makes you think there are vampires here?” he questioned as if it was a threat. Sunoo let out a giggle. 

“You're not the only vampire who lives in this building,” he whispered. Jungwon backed away in shock. What? He is a vampire too? How is that possible? Just then another guy much taller than Jungwon and Sunno came in. His name was Heeseung, Jungwon remembered.

“Sunoo, leave him be,” he ordered. “The others are waiting,” Was he also a vampire? 

“I'll be around if you need our help.” without another word Sunoo left the room. Jungwon sighed looking at the open window. 

“I will find you," he vowed, speaking aloud as if you could hear him. 

~Back to present orphanage~

     You had not seen Jungwon since that early spring morning, leaving you to fall into a depressive state, everyday the pain in your heart grew as the days dragged on without Jungwon. But about two weeks ago, it was going to be your three year anniversary of your stay at this orphanage. One partly cloudy afternoon, you were outside when a hummingbird flew down to your figure, who was placed in the middle of the garden, squatting down to the plants picking the required daily rations of herbs for the kitchen. At first you were not interested and irritated with its presence, but after a few tries to grab your attention, you finally looked up at the bird sitting on the little wooden label stuck in the ground. You had found a little skinny white ribbon in its beak. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you gently took the string and plucked a basil leaf tying the ribbon around it then gave it back to the hummingbird. Sending it back where it traveled from. 

     Another week went by, around eight o’clock in the morning the same hummingbird came back this time to your window with a little note tied to its foot. You rushed to the window, opening it letting him come in. Once you retrieved the note it said, 'Wait for me.' Jungwon. You sat all day long with butterflies in your stomach trying to understand the message. A call from outside by the headmistress broke your train of memories. The boys and girls got called inside for afternoon tea and snacks making you mentally cringe. As for you, the thought of food other than blood did not peak your interest. Speaking of snacks, it was almost pre-feeding time, which was only one hour. 

     Closing the book on your knees, you began to stand up when a sudden movement came from outside of the window down in the trees. You looked to the distant trees near the edge of the forest immediately spotting a tall male around your age leaning against a tall tree. He was looking right at you with curious eyes, he had chestnut brown hair and his clothes were a different style then the boys who stayed here. His eyes were like a doe's and he also had a soft handsome face and seemed to be fairly tall. Your eyes remained on him until a few kids came back outside to collect their toys distracting you for a second. When you looked back at the male he had vanished. Humming in confusion, you shrugged it off walking away from the window.

     Right around supper time, you finally needed to eat. Placing the last book back onto the shelf, you straightened up moving to the closed door reaching out to the door handle. When you opened the door however two female caretakers stood at the door blocking the way out. Their faces looked soft and friendly.

“The headmistress wants to see you, come with us,” the first one informed you. Feeling nervous and uncertain, you nodded slowly and followed them down to the left of the hall, but instead of moving more to the left to go downstairs to the office, they moved to the right. So you continued to walk past the entertainment room then down another hall reaching the end of it to the last door on the right. A feeling of dread came to your mind as the door opened and your body began to retreat from it. The second female caretaker caught your arm before you could rush back to your room. Quickly, she silenced you by covering your mouth with her hand, she then had help from the first caretaker and together they dragged you down the wooden flight of stairs down into the basement. The treatments were held down here, only, it was not a new month, so your treatment was already completed. 

     Fear clouded your mind as the stairs became more and more less, you did not know why you were being brought down here, but you did not like it.

“Please, my treatment is already complete! Why am I down here?” you asked as you fought their grip. Of course you got no answer. As your feet touched the cold damp stone floor, a male caretaker met the three of you at the end of the steps to help control your erratic behavior.   Fighting the attempt to use your full strength, the door to the hallway leading to the room was in view now. Unfortunately, it was not an examination hall, no, it was an experiment hall with the metal chairs in the center of the room. The dimly lit hallway showed the headmistress of the orphanage standing with her arms folded neatly in front of her. A fierce look of determination and disgust plastered on her pug like face. 

"Why am I going to the experiment chairs?" you frantically questioned her. She smiled reassuringly, which you saw right through. 

"Just a few extra tests we need to do," she simply replied. You panicked by stuttering out noises  of confusion. She gave a blank expression before giving a small nod to the door to her right. Without another moment to spare, the male caretaker began to drag you to the hallway. 

"No! Please! Call it off?!" you cried out. "I don't want to be tested!!" No one listened. You tried to break free without using your vampire strength, but it didn't work as well as you wanted. The door opened and the hallway came into sight. Your body was forced forward; there were small windows above the doors on both sides lining the hall, the sun was beginning to set giving the atmosphere an orange hue. 

     A door, five rooms down from the main door, opened and a few female nurses surrounded the small box-like room working on setting up medical equipment. In the center a chair with leather straps was standing. Something in you snapped as soon as your eyes came in contact with the metal chair, shoving your arm hard to the right, you sent the male to your right into the wall making it cave in slightly. A different male to your left immediately grabbed your free arm only to struggle shortly after to keep his hold on you. Before any more damage could happen from you, a sharp sting came from the nape of your neck. You screamed in pain, then reaching back to your neck gripping the object, you pulled it around to your eyes, it was a syringe with a blue residue left in the tube. No! Slowly you began to lose control of your surroundings, slumping to the floor as your vision faded into darkness. 

***

     You woke up in a forest full of trees, it was dull and misty outside around early morning. The birds sang sweetly in the trees and life in the forest was starting to wake up. Looking around the surrounding area, you noticed someone standing off in the distance. Walking closer, the person was wearing a gray blue sweater that had a hood, it was a strange style and looked from a different century. He seemed to have been looking around like he was lost until his eyes fell upon you. It was Jungwon. You felt as if your heart jumped to your throat, he was standing in front of you. Dashing a few feet ahead to close the distance between you both to touch him; a sudden invisible glass like wall trapped you from going any farther. You screamed out his name but he couldn't hear your cries. 

   Then the scene changed to a warm homey living room you had never seen before, but it wasn't the one that looked like a home, more like a boarding house. There were seven boys entertaining one another with a piano or dancing while some of them sat on a sofa laughing. A certain boy in the corner caught your eye immediately, it was Jungwon again. He was also watching the others play before his gaze turned straight to you. A smirk came along his face as he tilted his head to the side slightly, giving you a peek of his fangs. Found you.

***

     Jerking awake on the experiment chair, your body felt like led, it was only limited by the leather straps buckled down along your fatigued figure. The room was dark except for the small spotlight above you; to the right in the faint light was the door and a rolling table that had surgery tools displayed. Your senses heightened when your nose smelled something intensely sweet. Your mouth started to feel dry and tight, glancing to the table next to you was a bowl that held a deep crimson red liquid. Blood. But it smelled different, it was much more sweet then the blood you normally consumed. It was human blood.

     One nurse was present in the room, but she was busy taking notes at the desk in the nearby corner to notice you wake up. With a powerful pull you tried to break free from the buckles, but to no avail nothing helped. Your voice could not bring aid either, you were stuck until the other nurses would come finish the work of the test, now that you were awake. But the blue liquid would soon wear off and you could officially escape this place you once called home. Your baby blue dress is replaced with a plain white dress as well as your nicely pinned hair was now down in a tangled mess from threshing around.

“Oh good, you are awake,” the nurse said, standing up.

     A few minutes passed of sitting in the chair, the nurse finished not long ago attaching strange wires and needles in your arms. But you could slowly feel your strength come back to you each second that went by. Suddenly, the faint smell of smoke and fresh blood filled your nose. You sharply turned your head to the door. What was happening? Just then you could hear loud breathing and footsteps coming from upstairs. Then the word fire was shouted out faintly.  Looking at the nurse at the desk, she finally stood up after hearing a female cry out from down the hall behind the closed door. She opened the door glancing both ways down the hall before her gaze fixed to the left. The look of fear and terror came upon her face, she then quickly shut the door locking it, after it was secured, she came over to the table of tools grabbing a surgeon knife as a weapon. Your eyes stayed fixed on the door curious as to what was out there in the hall.  You heard slow stocking footsteps echo in the long hallway, before it stopped in front of the door. It was quiet, except for the shaking breath of the nurse who was cowardly hiding behind your chair. Your eyes watched the door’s movement carefully.  

     The lock on the door slowly unlocked itself before it creaked open wide. In dim lighting from the lights in the hall, a figure stood tall, it was a boy with blonde hair. He didn't look but fifteen years of age and held a playful smirk. His eyes were the only thing holding your attention at the moment. They were the color red. Blood red. His peering eyes gazed around the room landing on you and then behind you. As he stepped in the nurse screamed bloody murder and moved closer to the wall. 

"Who are you?!" she squeaked. The boy stocked into the room keeping silent as he made his way to her. She dodged him and ran to the door only to be blocked by his frame in a blink of an eye. Superspeed. He then broke her leg and caught her as she fell to the floor and dragged her out into the hall. You sit frozen as you hear her cries fade into nothing, the smoke is getting worse and you could hear the orphanage breaking above from the fire. Not even a second after the nurse was dragged out a different person appeared in the door frame. He was shorter than the boy you previously saw, he had brown hair and puppy-like eyes. Glancing down the room he spotted you, he looked to his right and motioned his hand in this direction. Was he going to hurt you? Are there more vampires? A sudden strong pull grew in your chest taking your breath away. It couldn’t be. The boy moved out of the doorway letting in another person you didn't expect to see. Jungwon took his friend’s place in the doorway looking in. When he saw you, he didn't spare a second coming straight to you. 

"Good job Jake!" he praised his friend. 

"Jungwon?!" you exclaimed in shock. He gave a small smile, but then frowned at the wires and needles in you. His eyes turned red in anger, he began to take them off. Then he grabs the leather straps, breaking them off your body. As soon as you were free, you threw your arms around him holding tight feeling the ache of the bond heal.

"I'm here," his gentle voice said, returning the hug. He didn't change in personality, but his voice was more mature and smooth since the last time you saw him. He pulled away cupping the side of your face to look at you.

"I can’t believe it’s you, I missed you," you whispered, admiring his face. Even after years of not seeing him you faintly remembered his facial features that strongly return to your memories all at once. 

"I missed you too," he said, kissing your knuckles. 

     Just then the surrounding of the building began to crack and crumble under you guys. Slipping out of the chair, your legs gave out under you from being in the chair without movement for too long. Jungwon then picked you up without a thought and transported you to the outside. When the cool fresh air hits you, you breathe in relaxation, the grass under your feet feels soft as Jungwon sets you down. He did however keep his arm around you to make you stable while you two watched the building go up in flames. 

     Soon six boys came out from the forest in a rush. You realized they were from that fever dream you had not twenty minutes ago. Jungwon's arms wrapped tighter around your frame. Resting his forehead against your temple in relief as your gaze continued to watch the fire consume. 

"You're free now," he whispered. The realization came upon you and your body slumped into his body, your eyes closing in the process. He was right, you were free. 

Two hundred years later, your steps were light as you made your way to the table where the members talked with one another. The business room was completely dark, the only light that was present was the city lights of New York outside. Your long black sleeve pencil dress sparkled in the light making you look like a diamond. You came around the table carrying your glass of red liquid, you gave Jay and Heeseung a smile as you passed them and then slipped in between Ni-ki and Jungwon. Ni-ki playful bumped your arm in acknowledgement, you smirked and repeated the same action to him. Jungwon noticed your presence after his conversation with Jake ended. His arm came around your waist hugging your frame close to his. You wouldn’t have changed meeting him in the forest that day, because as fate would have it, he would be in return your soulmate in eternity. 

“You look beautiful my love,” he complemented. You grinned at his words.

“Thank you Wonnie,” you responded. He smiled, slightly shaking his head at his nickname, looking back at the live city.

“Are you ready for a new beginning?” he asked in a whisper. You locked eye contact with him before leaning in, pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. Hearing the countdown of the New York ball drop.  

“Always with you,” you replied in the same tone. Jungwon smiled, hugging you close if that was possible, allowing you to lean into his side. Then you and the boys raised your glasses to the new year of the 2000’s ready for a new beginning to happen.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[littlemelaninfics]

Welcome to Boston

an: this wasn’t requested but I’m high asf right now (not on purpose bc I have work in 30 minutes), but I thought this was cute. Enjoy ☀️

tw: smoking weed, fluff, reader is 21+

You lounged on the bed flipping through the Firestick waiting for Chris to finish getting himself and Dodger ready for the day. You both woke up past 11:30, the soothing sounds of outside keeping you lull. It's rainy and cold which makes the perfect weather to stay in and watch movies, but you couldn't find one.

It wasn't necessarily a horror movie vibe; maybe tonight. Action? No. Drama? Ugh. You slam the remote down on the bed and flop backwards letting out a big sigh.

"Heeey. What's all that for?" Chris asked walking over the bedroom threshold. You sat up briefly taking in the physique of his sweatshirt covered torso and gray lounge shorts,

"Babe, you're not cold?"

He shook his head, "Heater's on," he said crossing to the bed and plopping down,

"What's with all the sighing?" He started to rub his hand over your thigh as you started to answer him,

"There's nothing to watch."

"There's nothing to watch or you don't know what to watch?"

"Is there a difference?"

"I guess not," he said with a chuckle. "What about a psycho-thriller? You love those."

"I don't have the mental capacity for that right now."

"What about a comedy? You don't have to pay full attention and you get a few laughs."

"Hm. Fine, I'll give a look."

"I'm gonna grab a quick snack. Want anything?"

"Just water please." He nodded his head and walked out. You scrolled through the endless pages of comedic movies and landed on a comedic duo you and Chris both loved. You hadn't seen the movie, but the synopsis sounded interesting. You cued it up to start when Chris walked back in the room,

"I thought you were getting a snack."

"We don't have much. We've been eating on the leftovers my mom left I guess we didn't notice. Find anything?"

"I'll Instacart some stuff here and yeah! It's called "The Interview" with Seth Rogen and James Franco. Have you seen it?"

"No, I've never heard of it, but okay." You were quickly ordering groceries when you realized Chris hadn't moved from across the room. Feeling eyes on you, you looked up and at him, who was grinning like a kid.

"What? What did you do?"

"Nothing... yet."

"Yet?"

"Just.. found something that may make this day even better."

"What did you find?"

Chris brought his hands from behind his back and held up the baggie of weed and swishers, giving them a very enticing shake. You looked at what he was holding and shook your head, letting a small smile creep.

"Oh you just happened to find that?"

"It was in the back of a drawer in the kitchen. I didn't think I had any left."

"Baby...you know I gave that up. Weed is weed. It's nothing special."

"You gave up SoCal weed. This is Boston weed."

"And what is 'Boston Weed'?"

"The shit that'll change your life." You looked at him for a second before giving in. He gleefully walked to his side of the bed and climbed in. He got comfortable, handing you your water and opened the baggie.

"Whoa!" You both exclaimed. The potent odor of the raw flower permeated the room before a spark was even lit. Chris brought the baggie to his nose and inhaled deeply.

"Smells like a Saturday filled with Looney Toons and Captain Crunch."

"Babe, how old is this stuff?" You asked, hinting that it may not be safe for consumption if he was smoking it in his teens.

"Like 6 months." You rolled your eyes and ginned looking back at your phone at how childish he could be sometimes. You were finishing the delivery order while Chris took the nearest book and set up to roll.

"They should be here by the time the movie is over. It's gonna take a little longer because of the rain."

"That's fine. We can keep ourselves occupied," he said holding up the tightly rolled blunt.

"Chris Evans, that is a beautifully crafted j. Willie Nelson himself would be proud.

"Thank you, baby," he said holding the blunt to his lips and lighting it. You watched as he inhaled the smoke deeper into his lungs. He leaned back on the exhale, head hitting the headboard. He kept his eyes closed as he took another hit, holding it in and passing you the blunt. You looked at it for a second and then back at Chris who was already glossy eyed.

You took a deep breath and put the blunt to your lips, sucking in the potent smoke. You held it as long as you could before exhaling followed by a string of heavy coughing,

“Oh what the fuck,” you said between coughs.

“I told you that shit is different,” he said laughing at your pain.

You swallowed hard and took another hit after your chest stopped burning so much. The same thing happened, but not as strong. Then you went for a third,

“Whoa whoa hey. Puff puff pass, remember? And take it easy. This’ll have you stoned into next week.” You two passed the blunt between yourselves until you noticed the movie was already on. Your attention turned to the screen and you zoned out until your brain registered something funny which enticed you to laugh.

The movie was a little more than half over when your stomach started to growl,

“I think I have the munchies,” you said without your eyes diverting from the film.

“I know I do.”

“Wanna get a snack?”

“We have to go to the store.”

“Oh yeah. I can’t drive for shit right now, should we walk?” You asked holding your hand out in front of your face as a test of sobriety. Chris slowly turned his head to look out the window,

“It stopped raining. Should we walk?”

“Wait. Didn’t I say we should walk?”

“No you said you were hungry.”

“Oh yeah. Um, yeah. Let’s get dressed.”

The two of you took almost 20 minutes to get ready to walk half a mile but you finally made it to the front door. Chris got distracted yanking your hood over your head and calling you his little Eskimo baby. The two of you giggled in the foyer for almost 2 minutes before grabbing the knob.

When the door opened, both of you instinctively inhaled the fresh air deeply, letting the chilled Boston air hit your flushed faces. You smiled slightly as the beautifully golden sun beamed down on your cheeks. The sky after the rain was your favorite. You were about to take a step, when…

“I can’t.”

“What?” Chris asked looking down at you.

“I can’t do it,” you replied starring blankly ahead at the slick driveway.

“Do what, baby?”

“Move.”

“Ha! You can’t move?”

“No.”

“Do you want me to carry you?”

“Then people will know for sure that I’m high.”

“Babe, people are going to know. Or they might not because they’re probably high too.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive. Just walk slow. We’re not in a hurry.”

“Okay,” you said as you reached for his arm to help guide you down the front steps. The two of you walked linked together to the corner mart. You picked out everything you have a craving for or might crave later. You went to check on Chris and saw he abandoned the “pick what you can carry” and opted for a whole ass basket.

“Babe.”

“Don’t look at me like that. It’s supposed to rain all weekend and I’m not coming back out if I don’t have to.” His logic wasn’t flawed so you emptied your arms into the basket and walked the rest of the store with him. The security guards must’ve had a good ol’ time watching you two laugh at absolutely everything and do silly dances in the isles to the music.

It was finally time to check out and you waited patiently, thinking about what you would eat first…or if you should elevate the high and then eat. You were pulled from your thoughts when Chris put his hand around your waist and walked you out of the store. Luckily the baggers were great because you only had three bags each to carry back home.

You were in mid conversation when you walked up the driveway and Chris stopped midway. You were finishing your sentence when you looked at him,

“What?”

He looked at the bags in his hands and then back up to the door as if something wasn’t making sense. You followed his eyes up to the porch and dropped the bags in your hands to cover you face.

“We already ordered groceries,” Chris said as he turned to you.

“Yes. Yes we did.”

“Hopefully the power doesn’t go out,” he said picking up the bags you dropped and waking up to the door. You couldn’t help but let out a little giggle at the oopsie you both made.

‘Maybe we can donate some’, you thought as you entered the house and closed the door.

[awisespirit]

THE DEVIL WITHIN?!

(SIYEON VER.)

GP SIYEON X FEM READER

Warnings: ⚠️ maybe be triggering for some⚠️ ⚠️ landlady Siyeon⚠️ ⚠️GP Siyeon ⚠️ ⚠️ Reader being touched against her will?⚠️ ⚠️ Mentions of sexual trauma⚠️ ⚠️ Mentions of Chocol, Dami and Jiu⚠️

A/N: Hey guys! To the anon who requested for a Siyeon ver... I tried my best. Kinda feel like it's sloppy tho and I'm sorry for it. Will definitely write a part 2 for it. This part might be a little confusing as it was originally supposed to be posted after Jiu's version but yeah... You guys will see soon. Hope you loves enjoy it. 💕😶‍🌫️.

(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾)~(~‾▿‾

"look y/n I don't fucking care the hell your going through right now. I need the damn payment. It has been 2 months. Either pay up or I'm kicking you out."

"No please Siyeon-nim just give me one more day I'll find some money. I'll pay you b-back please don't kick me out. T-their s-still after me."

"Do I look like I care slut? Maybe I should call Chocol let her know where you are!?"

The rent was due, yet again and it's 2 months payment this time. You had no job, a runaway, no money the only shelter you find was under the Lee apartment. The place was decent with a shared kitchen and bathroom. Lee Siyeon was your landlady and housemate. She's a really close acquaintance of Jo Gayoung also known as Chocol.

Yes Chocol the woman was after you, she was waiting on having you as a payback for your father's debt that he left before disappearing.

Why was your life so fucked up? First Dami then Chocol then Jiu.... Who's next next in line to use you for their pleasure?

Siyeon reached out for her phone on the table.

"n-no please Siyeon-nim I'm begging you d-don't do it. Is there any other way I could pay you back?"

You become desperate, you didn't even realize what you were sounding like.

Siyeon lowered her gaze to you, something on her mind.

"anything?"

"y-yes! Anything!"

Siyeon's eyes filled with an emotion that brought back bitter memories for you.

"S-Siyeon- ah"

You were lifted up on her arms. she brought you in her room and dropped you on to her bed.

"take everything off." Her voice was calm but it did hold that sinister aura.

She took out some chains from her drawer.

"you said anything, therefore I'm gonna make you be my fucking little cum slut."

It's her. The woman you thought who would at last be your saviour from the horrible world outside, is now the devil you never knew about.

Your arms and legs being tied to the bed frame.

"n-no please. Don't do this to me!-"

She shut you up with her lips. You tried your best to get yourself free by wriggling you arms and shouting. But where did that get you?

Nowhere, absolutely nowhere with a harsh slap to your cheek.

Her left had a firm grip on your neck slowly restrainting the air from you.

"look, I'm a person who doesn't change my mind often. If I've made up my mind, then it is what it is slut."

Another hard slap to your face. Tears already streaming your cheeks. Her smirk made you sick.

She removed her shirt and pants. She craked open a fresh can of beer it seems and drowned it right away. This gave you more memories about the one who was after you.

"your a monster." You whispered enough for her to hear.

"Yeah I am. I'm a fucking monster who's gonna treat you as my fuck toy."

Then she removed her shorts as you come face to face with her member.

She pushes herself into your mouth with no time.

"ahh yes, suck it like stupid whore you are."

Her cock was deep in your mouth it made you gag everytime she the very back of it.

"your mouth itself is so good, then how great would that pussy of yours feel? Fuck it I'm gonna fuck it. Fuck your thight pussy over and over, again and again."

"And I'll fucking cum in you, fill you up with my cum and make you carry my children! Got that my cum slut?"

-THE END-

(ノ^_^)ノ(ノ^_^)ノ(ノ^_^)ノ(ノ^_^)ノ(ノ^_^)ノ(ノ

[tenisperfection]

Visitor, a 6 x 12 drabble. Buck and Eddie talk about the shooting.

Like clockwork, there's a knock right as the mac and cheese is ready.

"Oh my fucking god," Buck isn't even sure he's whispering anymore, and he isn't sure he really cares either. Briefly, he considers not answering—he is recovering from being dead, after all—even as his feet carry him to the front door automatically.

"Hi," Eddie says hurriedly and brushes past Buck into the house. Buck peers out into the hallway to check for Christopher and then remembers that he and Denny are having a sleepover. Mike from down the hall gives him a weird look that he quickly shifts into a smile, and Buck smiles back awkwardly.

"Um, hello?" Buck says, voice slightly raspy. He clears his throat. Eddie, in the five seconds since Buck let him in, has somehow managed to grab two beers from the refrigerator and is in the process of opening them.

"Hey," Eddie answers shortly, uncorking the beers deftly in a motion that's always been distracting.

"Did you just come to steal my beer?" Buck asks. "Or did Maddie—"

"Maddie didn't send me," Eddie says with a small smile. He slides one of the beers towards Buck and grabs the oven mitts from the second drawer below the counter like he's done it a thousand times before, because he's done it a thousand times before. "So Bobby brought mac and cheese?"

Ten minutes of mouthfuls of cheese and pasta and comfortable silence later, Buck broaches the topic again.

"So not that I'm not having a good time—"

"I came over because I didn't tell you the whole truth before and I came over before my courage wore off," Eddie says calmly. Buck briefly marvels at how steady Eddie sounds, even as his own chest feels a little funny. He should probably make note of that, but Eddie keeps talking.

"I think it took me by surprise," he says slowly, eyes on his nearly empty plate.

"Being shot? I'd hope so," Buck blurts out because he knows what Eddie is talking about, and then immediately winces. Eddie laughs, eyes finally coming to rest on Buck. The funny feeling intensifies.

"No, your question earlier," Eddie clairifes. "We hadn't spoken about it all this time and now—" he trails off, eyes wavering again. He takes two sips of his beer in quick succession, one of his nervous tics.

"—now we are," Buck finishes.

Eddie nods but says nothing, drinking his beer again. Buck feels as though he's siphoning off metaphorical liquid courage from Eddie.

"So let's talk about it," Buck says.

Eddie looks up at that. To Buck's surprise, he smiles. For a man who has habit and routine etched on his skin, he is constantly surprising Buck.

"I was hoping you'd say something like that."

-------------------------------------------------

"I did mean it when I said that I thought that was it," Eddie says. They've moved to the balcony, the night beautiful and endless and vast. Eddie's voice is quiet again, but his eyes never leave Buck's. "But I didn't tell you the whole truth."

"Okay," Buck says, hoping Eddie would continue, and somehow knowing that he would.

"I remember pain. I remember seeing blood. I remember falling down. I remember blood, on you. I remember thinking you were hurt and how I couldn't move enough to get to you."

There is blood in Buck's mouth, metallic and distinct and Eddie's, and there is a street that is once again a street but was once the setting for the worst day of Buck's life. There is a lazy Wednesday night and Eddie sitting across from him, warm and alive and eyes on Buck.

There used to be days when Buck couldn't separate the two.

"I remember Christopher. I remember thinking I won't watch him grow up."

Buck doesn't jump when Eddie's hand comes to rest on his own, but he does realize that he's shaking a little. Eddie's hand on his reminds him of Taylor's when she's held them that day outside the hospital, though Eddie's feels much less temporal, much more like belonging.

"I remember you. I remember watching you. I remember how still you were, how scared I was."

"I was so scared," Buck says, and he turns his hand so he's gripping Eddie's tightly.

"I remember you saying you were okay, and I remember how I let go then. I remember thinking I'd never see you again."

There are tears on Buck's face that should've fallen that day on that street. Eddie stays still next to him, his hand so, so warm and alive. Buck rests his forefinger on his wrist and feels his beating pulse. Alive. Awake. Alive. Since his own experience with death, Buck thinks he understands the distinction between those a little more.

"What do you think would've happened if we'd spoken about this then?" Eddie asks unexpectedly amidst another descent into silence during which Buck's face feels less wet. It's the first time all evening Eddie sounds anything less than sure.

"Then?" Buck echoes. "You mean after you woke up?"

Eddie shrugs. "Maybe. Or after we got home."

"At your party?" Buck asks, and he can't help the note of amusement in his voice. "In front of Ana and Taylor?"

Eddie laughs. "I guess that might have been weird." He sobers up a little as they descend into silence. Buck wonders if Eddie would move his hand any time now. He wishes he wouldn't.

"I've been thinking about the what-ifs, ever since you came back to us," Eddie says. "Maybe we would've been different if we'd only spoken about it then."

"Then you didn't get the story right," Buck says quietly, and for all the times they have come close to this in the face of almost certain death, it's almost impossible that they're here now, sitting on Buck's balcony and sipping beers like they have a thousand times before.

"Yeah?" Eddie asks slowly.

"The story isn't about the what-ifs. It's about being here in this life. It's about acceptance. And forgiveness. So I don't think you should think about the what-ifs. You should think about the present and what you do have now."

Eddie could take the out. Eddie could lighten the moment and use Buck's self-help book spiel to goad him lightheartedly. Buck would laugh then, casually move his hand away from Eddie's and bully him into bringing Buck another beer. They've played this game before. Buck has it down to a science.

"Okay," Buck hears Eddie say. His heart soars. "Okay, you're right."

"Okay," he echoes. Eddie squeezes his hand and doesn't let go, and for all of Buck's advice, he sees down a never-ending array of nights just like this, just the two of them here like this, day after day, month after month, year after year. It doesn't feel quite like a what-if. It feels like a future, and Buck thinks that Eddie just told him that they should have it.

They talk into the night, and Eddie doesn't go. Buck does bully him into bringing him more beer and Eddie doesn't go, instead dragging Buck in to the kitchen with him, eyes dark and warm. Buck laughs and cries into the night, and Eddie does it with him. Eddie stays.

They pick up Christopher from the Wilson's the next day. Buck follows Eddie and Christopher home, and this time, he goes home for good.