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#not giving up
anothergoodtime · 3 months
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Far from perfect but making progress and that’s all I can ask for. Thankful that workouts have been helping me mentally and physically. Five months in and it’s become a daily habit. 💪🏻
Special shout out to @thoughtsnfeelingsofacloudedmind for keeping me motivated instead of letting me give up. 💕
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random-xpressions · 7 months
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Let her be the sin you wouldn't want to repent from...
Random Xpressions
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jngswheein · 1 year
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CHAEWON ♡ NO RETURN (INTO THE UNKNOWN) 230507 le sserafim @ inkigayo
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ekowolf · 6 months
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TW: Suicide (song)
how much can your skin crawl before you want to rip it all from your bones?
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Strong for Someone Else Pt.2. (TW: SA)
Her standing here broken was his victory lap.
She let her eyes glance downward. Oh Rao
Her body was a sea of red. Her white button down in tatters, filet open.
Her blue bra.
Exposed.
Her legs barely covered by the remnants of her skirt.
Exposed.
The matching blue underwear that should have been there but now nowhere to be seen.
Exposed.
Exposed.
Exposed.
Salvation was right in front of her.
She hoped.
She knew she didn’t deserve it but—she hoped.
Her mind cycling through images like flickering reel of film. The pain. The searing pain. The hands. The smell potent to her nostrils. The water overwhelming her lungs. The gravely voice in her ear. The hands. The cold metal shackling her legs, her wrists.
The hands.
She knew she was spiraling. She knew the darkness was consuming what little was left of her. Her strength giving its last gasp before her reserves were depleted.
Her body couldn’t even find another ounce of energy to pull her hand back the few tiny inches to knock.
Too far. Too much.
She did the only thing she could do, she called out to her best friend and hoped her superhearing could pick up the sound over the game night frivolity.
The voice that came out of her she didn’t recognize, much like the rest of her; it was breathy and raw, her chest screaming with the effort to expel it.
Almost there.
“K-kara…” Lena felt her vignetting vision pulse and close in on her further like the shutter of a camera.
How much time passed since she said her best friends name? Seconds? Minutes? Her mind was unlatching from reality. Was she even at Kara’s door? Maybe she was still…there…back there?
She felt herself falling forward, the door disappeared as if it was never really there at all. Or maybe it was her that wasn’t really there?
Falling. She was falling.
She waited for the ground to claim her, to eat what puny remains was left of her—it isn’t much.
But the ground never came. Instead she felt strong, warm arms catch her so delicately it could have been a cloud that kept her from the ground and she wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.
In a way it was as similar to a cloud you could get—her friend who touched the sky and danced with skyscrapers.
She scraped the bottom of her reserves and used the last drop of energy to open her eyes.
She just wanted to see her.
One more time.
One last time?
Blue eyes like the sky on a clear summer day right before the sun went down, twinkling its few sacred stars so they could be seen through the atmosphere. It was a gift to see both night and day at once. That was Kara.
She could see Kara’s mouth moving but there was no sound. It was as if her ears couldn’t hear anything past the thumping of her own heart. She watched as the blonde turned her head like Kara was saying something behind her. Yelling maybe?
Oh, she wished she could hear her beautiful voice, even then.
She dug so deep to bring her hand up to the warm cheek under those soul piercing eyes that seemed different in the moment. Trying to calm them but like a storm rolling through those eyes looked for release.
She rubbed her thumb gently underneath, catching a tear before it traveled too far down Kara’s soft cheeks.
“D-don’t cr-…cry”, Lena whispered as her lips stuck together with the stickiness of blood like glue curing on a canvas.
But her eyes are too heavy, her body finally giving in, the darkness being just another thing to claim her tonight.
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Kakashi is a broken man.
He’s not a man capable of taking a stance like Sasuke or declaring out loud that he wants the system to change. He had that kicked out of him age five when his father died, and further destroyed from him with Obito, Rin and Minato’s death.
The man hardly recognizes that he is capable of doing something because he is so stuck on his past mistakes that he doesn’t think he can do better. That’s why he’s so supportive of Naruto’s proclamations to do better.
He wants that.
He knows that’s the what the village needs.
But he cannot stand up and declare that himself any longer, so he’s the one who supports those who still have the strength to fight.
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misskattylashes · 3 months
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What's that sound? Oh yeah it's just me weeping because I was supposed to see Miles tonight but can't go....
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poems-to-read · 2 months
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You are here
I have to put a lot of strength and faith With these thoughts to not
give up
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mysoulsecrets-blog · 1 year
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BEEN A GIVER!
After giving myself selflessly to the people who never valued my love, friendship and time, the ones I loved with all my heart and invested my whole to maintain the respect, bond, connections and relationships, I realised I need myself more for myself than anyone else and that's the reason I will never give up on myself.
ACCEPTING THE LOVE I DESERVE FOR MYSELF BY MYSELF. ♥️
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elialys · 3 months
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if i ever manage to finish this chapter and all its heavy conversations, I'll deserve the biggest fucking cookie
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p-h03n1-x · 9 months
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Yibo Official Weibo update 8.6.2023 It’s okay to be a sparring partner for other dancers, it’s okay if you can’t compete on stage, it’s okay to wear a “trash can” to perform! Chen Shuo is always saying: "I can."
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spookysalem13 · 2 days
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I had a dream last night 🌙 that I had a baby. That chaos was going on around me but I never stopped my loving gaze towards my baby who was holding my finger in their hand. That my cat Taffy came up to greet the baby & brush her cheek up against theirs, just like she does with me. To Taffy this is her way of showing affection. It's like kisses to her. 🥰
Then my baby turned into a toddler, they told me they really liked dinosaurs 🦕. And I told them it didn't matter who the companies made the toys for. If it was for boys or girls. All that mattered was that they enjoyed it. I played dinosaurs with my toddler in my dream as Taffy was always near, keeping a close eye to make sure they were alright.
Then I woke up. It was the sweetest dream. Yet, a hard one to bare. There's a high chance I may never be able to have children. Even adoption isn't an option unless I'm married, due to my specific health conditions. Not to mention this country has monetized adoption which is disgusting. So it makes it so expensive.
My dream in life since I was young child, whenever anyone asked me. Was always to be a Mamma. To raise children of my own. I used to say I didn't even care if I had to do it on my own. I was always so determined that I was going to be a mother one day.
The day doctors explained to me what the combination of having kids and my health conditions would do to me. My heart broke 💔 instantaneously. Though I never gave up hope that my health would one day improve enough to make it easier to handle.
I was told if I wanted to risk it, I needed to do so by the age of 25. Well I'm 25 now. And my health has been worse than ever before. But I'm still not giving up hope. I will never give up hope that somehow, some way, I will be able to have a child to love and raise and cherish.
I appreciate the moments I had in my dream last night. It made me really happy. I will keep trying to improve my health, I will hope with everything I have as I get older with my specific conditions that they won't hinder my ability to have a child safely for both of us. It's always been my dream and I will forever hold onto it. Despite the odds.
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fipindustries · 9 months
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no pressure buddy, you are just assembling the third attempt at your dream machine in front of your literal fans who traveled to see you
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ssnakey-b · 10 months
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FF8 English-French translarison, part 25: Four years later
Well, it only took four years but the translarison is back, baby! I told you I didn’t give up on it. That said, looking back, I found it amazing that some people seemed to follow it closely and get genuinely excited for new updates, and I have to admit I feel a bit bad to have disappointed these people. So to all those who have been following the Translarison from the start and were saddened to see it gone, I offer my apologies. If you’re still around and still excited for it, you’re real ones. Now, on the off chance that some of you stumbled upon this post with no idea what I’m on about, hi. I’m Ssnakey-B (fun fact: it’s short for SsnakeBite!), a French native and Final Fantasy VIII-obsessed weirdo. So, just a... short while ago... I decided to bring these two things together and start a playthrough of FFVIII where I would compare the English and French translations of the game, partly because I’m a bit mental, but mostly because I noticed quite a few differences between the two that I feel give a different view of the characters and various moments in the game, which i think highlight the importance of translation in how audiences perceive a work. So you see, it’s a translation comparison; a translarison, if you will. I also take the opportunity to analyze and comment on various moments from the game. Oh! And I go through this assuming people are already familiar with the game, so beware of spoilers. And whether you’re an OG or a newcomer, if you need to catch up, why not check this convenient list of links to every part published so far that I put together? Anyway, time to finally get back into it. Last time, we finished the CD 2 content with the second and final battle against Edea, putting an end to the Battle of the Gardens. And so, we return to find Squall moping in bed, because that’s what he does when faced with stressful situations, which is a mood and a half.
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“So it’s all over, then.”
French Squall, no!! We literally just returned! Now’s not the time to give up!
Okay, joking aside, we do have quite a bit of difference right off the bat, as in English, his inner monologue goes as such:
(is it over...?)
(What happened...?)
(Rinoa......)
(What happened to Rinoa......?)
Whereas in French, it goes like this:
(So it’s all over, then)
(When it comes to Edea, at least...)
(But... for Linoa?)
(This story has only just begun!)
So yeah, very different tone I would say, with the French version sounding more determined, less confused. I’ll leave you to decide which one is more fitting given the circumstances. I think an argument can be made for both, depending on whether you believe it’s understandable for someone in his situation to be lost and confused, or if this lighting a fire under him reflects his character development.
Also, not entirely sure why the English version is going so crazy with the ellipses......
After a quick visit to the infirmary, Squall is told by Quistis over the intercom to visit Edea as she is back at the orphanage. Since we get to visit Balamb Garden again, let’s take the opportunity to check on the various NPCs before that, shall we?
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First, we’ve gota small difference with this kid who runs around the hall all the time. In English, he says “Come on! ... Take the pain! One more!” whereas in French, he says “I want to beat my endurance record!”. So in both versions, we get that he’s training hard, but we have a slightly different take on it.
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Next, we have he cafeteria ladies, the unsung heroines of Balamb Garden. The one on our left mentions students being obsessed with their weight in both versions but interestingly, the English one says a bit more, joking about how “They won’t be able to get a tummy like mine! Ahahahahaha!” which is absent from the French version entirely. Speaking of, the French cafeteria lady doesn’t just say that students are concerned about dieting but that she thinks they’re “more obsessed by calories than their exam”. MA’ AM.
THEY JUST FOUGHT AN ACTUAL BATTLE AGAINST AN ACTUAL ARMY.
THERE WERE HOCKEY MONSTERS.
I think that deserves SOME credit towards their graduation.
Anyway, that’s about it for differences with them although do keep in mind, in the French version, they’re all out of pretzels, not hot-dogs. This is a crucial difference.
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We’re not done with the cafeteria, however, as we get to this group, which I’m sure some of you have been looking forward to. And really, it IS interesting since you can’t directly translate the ifnamous “SaaD” pun (which i assume wasn’t in the original Japanese anyway). So how does it go? Well, shorter, mostly. Check it out.
First, here’s the English version:
“I must say, we’re pretty tough.”
“Word... I thought it was the end for me when we had that fight with the other Garden.”
“We’ve accomplished quite a feat. The fighting inside Garden, the battle with the other Garden... That wasn’t training. It was the real thing!”
“YEAH! There were lots of casualties from both sides, but we’re still alive!”
“YEAH! YEAH! We can DO IT!”
“But... We still aren’t SeeDs...”
“...So, we end up complainin’... SaaaaaaD...”
“SaaaaaaD...”
“Sometimes, I actuallly enjoy complaining... SaaaaaaD...”
And now, the French take on it:
We were brave on this one.
I thought we were going to die for sure!
There is a big difference between classes and a real battle.
Yeah! We managed to make it out alive!
We’re not that bad, after all!
But we’re still not Seeds...
That’s true. What a catastrophe...
How sad.
We truly are pitiful.
Again, you’d think being part of an actual battle would at least earn them some credits. I gues sit still wasn’t enough for them to pass already. Either that or the pun from the English team caused them to have some points docked.
You’re probably wondering if there’s anything interesting in what the Quistis simp Trepie ins aying. The answer to that is not really, although he doesn’t call her “sinful” because it’s somehow her fualt he isn’t getting any sleep.
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There isn’t much difference in the dialogue between these girls (in fact, it’s surprising how closesly it matches) but I did want to bring it up because it just occured to me that they are likely talking about Linoa, and I think it says a lot about her that in her short time in Balamb Garden, she apparently managed to make friends with some people to the point they want to go visit her in the infirmary.
I suppose it IS possible that they’re talking about an unrelated friend who could’ve gotten injured during the battle of the Gardens and there are more beds that we don’t get to see (it would be weird if there was aonly one) but at the same time, there’s no indication of that in either version of the dialogue. Although with that said, I did notice that there’s usually a group of three girls chatting around and here there’s only two of them, so who knows?
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There are a couple interesting things here. The dialogue with Zell is almost identical (also, always found it weird that he’s sometimes in his civlian clothes and sometimes in his cadet uniform in this bit. What a weird thing to put extra work towards), but this little girl’s lines couldn’t be more different. In the English version, she wants reassurance, asking “Is the scary stuff over? It’s over, right?”. But in French, she says “So the warm-up is over? I was just starting to have fun.”
So not only did this little girl apparently take part in the fighting in the French version (which contradicts Squall’s orders, BTW), she’s clearly developed an insatiable thirst for battle that can only be shortly quenched by the blood of her enemies. Terrifying and also great potential for a sequel. Just sayin’, Square-Enix.
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We also have a slight difference in tone with this guy. In English, he sounds still shaken yet thrilled by the battle, going “I...I fought too. And...and, victory was mine!!!” while in French, he’s much collected, going “I fought too. And I suffered no injury!”
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Next, we head to the library. This student explains that it is taking request for new books and weirdly, the line in the screenshot above is not in the French version. Another weird change is that he then says that he is “all for fiction” whereas in French, he says that he prefers news. The girl also says in English that she wants mystery novels and in French, she says she wants crime thrillers/whodunits and nothing else.
I guess mystery and crime novels aren’t mutually exclusive, but I feel like “mystery” is a much broader category, so that’s the kind of detail that once again hints at the translations being done independently rather than based on one-another.
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Next we have these two and this one is very interesting. First, in English, the girl on the left asks “So I guess we won?” but in French, what she says is more along the lines of “So I take it we won?” which is really weird because it makes it sound like she wasn’t there and doesn’t know what happened.
But more importantly, the one on the right replies with the above line, which is excellent, but in French, it becomes “You never really know who wins... But yes, I think we did.”
Yeah, the French version dropped the ball on that one IMO.
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And finally there’s this bizzarely rare NPC who I don’t think i’ve ever seen before and had to go back and forth multiple times to get to appear after switching to French. She’s sad in both versions but not quite as much in French, where she just laments “oh, this is all so sad” rather than outright crying like here.
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I believe that’s it for the first floor, let’s get to the second and meet Selphie! There’s an interesting little difference as she specifically says that the Garden’s BBS is fun, whereas in French, she calls it the “network”, even using the English term, which is surprising considering for once, it’s not a anglicism that we use in this context, really.
You may also have noticed that she’s wearing her cadet uniform, well she adresses that and interestingly, in both versions she calls them “regular” uniforms which might imply it’s not actually a cadet-specific uniform? Squall does keep it in his room even after graduating, so I guess that makes sense. But what’s really interesting here is that in English, she says those are nice for a change as you stop wearing them once you become a SeeD.
So I guess those ARE cadet uniforms but wait, she’s wearing right now so clearly they don’t stop wearing them and I’m way overthinking this, aren’t I? What I meant to talk about is that in French, she kind of has the opposite stance saying that while these uniforms are pretty neat, she prefers the SeeD ones (and she doesn’t mention anything about no longer wearing them).
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Quick stop by this guy to mention that he only breakes the fourth wall in the English version, which is surprising considering so far, the French one has been the one to have some fourth-wall breaking jokes.
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There’s no real difference here (other than the English version sounding more excited due to a liberal use of exclamation marks) but I did want to point out that this is the only NPC so far to acknowledge Squall as his boss.
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And that wraps all of the interesting bits I could find within Balamb Garden. Time to get to the orphanage! And here we have another example of how nearly identical phrases can have a different vibe in different languages. Here, in English, Quistis says “...I feel uncomfortable seeing her” while in French, she says “I am not very comfortable at the idea of seeing her again”.
Now maybe it’s just me, but I feel like the English take on it makes it feel more like Quistis is uncomfortable seeing Edea at all, as if her very sight made her uncomfortable, whereas the French one feels more like she’s talking specifically about hos strange it feels to go visit her after they nearly killed one-another. Small, but crucial differences.
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The difference between Irvine’s lines is much more pronounced. In English, he says “There’s so much we want to ask the Matron” and in French, he says “It’s weird to go see someone we fought” (which of course mirrors Quistis’ feelings).
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Since the characters not in your team are standing in this area, we’ve got different lines depending on what your party is, so let’s quickly go over them. In English, Selphie says “I’ll go after you, Squall. Ok, ok?” and in French, she says “You speak first, OK?”.
Now that’s a very interesting one because I feel like the French version makes Selphie sound a bit more nervous and relying on Squall to break the ice, which goes to show they’ve come to trust him as their leader, even when interacting with Edea.
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As for Zell, in English, he goes “We’re meeting the Matron... M-Man, I’m nervous”. His French counterpart is more calm, saying “It’s a bit stressful seeing the governess after what happened”.
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Small thing I noticed, Cid tends to nervously chuckle a few times, which doesn’t happen in French, making him seem a bit more eloquent. For example, here he says “I’m sorry” in the French version.
There is also a small difference before he asks them to forgive Edea where in English, he says “I don’t care about myself... But...” while in French, he says “I know I disappointed you”. Again, one of those small things that does change the overall feel of the scene a bit.
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Interestingly, as they start talking with Edea, I noticed that this is a rare (possibly unique) occasion where some of the lines are the same for multiple characters, although it’s all variations of “We attacked you even though we knew you were our Matron” in both versions.
There isn’t a huge amount of difference in Edea’s speech at first, the only somewhat notable one being that in French, she explicitly tells them that she could become possessed again at any given time while in the English version, she trails off after saying “At anyime, I may...”.
Also interesting is that each character has a different line if you try to leave before Edea is finished, which is admirable attention to detail, but also not so great if you’re some sort of fool who for some reason decided to compare two translations of the same video game and has to reboot the game each time to try different party combinations, only to find that the unique lines aren’t different enough to mention anyway.
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Something I want to point out is another example of the difference in how text is formatted in both versions, as we’ve seen in some of the pre-hiatus entries. As you can see, in the English version, “Sorceress Ultimecia” is highlighted in blue, which is not the case in the French translation, where the name isn’t different from the rest of the text.
We eventually reach an interestng divergence in the speech. Nothing major but in English, Edea explains that "There was no way I was going to let Ultimecia get a hold of Ellone. The only thing I coud do was... ..Surrender my soul to ultimecia and lose control my mind”.
Note how the way she says it here sounds like she willingly let Ultimecia take her over so she couldn’t go after Ellone. Meanwhile, in the French version, Edea says that she “refused to let her bewitch Ellone. In revenge... I am the one she possessed”.
So this one makes it sound more like Edea somehow stopped Ultimecia from possessing Ellone, and Ulti taking Edea instead was a punishment. Quite a different take on the story.
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This difference seems to be confirmed a bit later in the English text, where Edea says that if Ultimecia tries to take her over again, she’ll “make a stand this time”, implying she didn’t resist initially. This distinction is absent from the French version.
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Another interesting small difference; in French, Edea tells the group “I need you, children” when mentioning the fact that they may be forced to fight again, in contrast to the English version, where she refers to them as “Young SeeDs”. One sound smore like she’s appealing to them as the children she raised, one as the soldiers they’ve become. Once again, it’s a small detail, but one that I think allows for a different reading of the situation.
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And now, we get to the part where Edea mentions Adel for the first time.
Ah, crap...
Well, I would have had to mention it sooner or later.
So, the French version did something weird with Adel. Now we all know, Adel is an unusual character in that despite being a woman, she has a clearly masculine body (and I don’t just mean because she’s muscular. Women can be muscular, but she has other masculine characteristics). And I guess the French translator was confused and decided to turn her into an intersex character.
To my knowledge, the French version of the game is the only one to have made such a change and er, yeah, once I found out, it was pretty awkward, and it hasn’t gotten better in modern days where trans, non-binary and intersex representation and rights are a much bigger concern, or at least a more mainstream one. I also want to mention in passing that they use the term “hermaphrodite” which isn’t exactly proper these days, but I want to remind everyone that back then, the word “intersex” wasn’t commonly used (in fact, I’m not sure it existed at all), so I won’t hold that against them at least.
Now, I guess that change in itself wouldn’t necessarily be a huge issue (although it does kind of break the rule that only women can become sorceresses, especially as they usually refer to Adel using male pronouns from what I recall), a bit awkward but ultimately not that big a deal...
... but what makes this so much worse is that, while one variation on how the characters react to Edea asking if they know about Adel, one of the lines (which are shared across multiple characters, at least in the French version), isn’t too terrible, referring to Adel as a “half-man, half-woman being”, there’s one where the character, either Zell or Irvine, uses a term which... well, I don’t know if to call it an outright slur is quite right (it doesn’t help that French people aren’t quite as offended by slurs as English-speaking people tend to be), but it’s not exactly a respectful term for someone who likes to crossdress.
Look, I’m not even gonna bother trying to find an English equivalent, it’s not necessary and that’s one can of worms I am perfectly happy leaving closed. I just wanted to bring it up because I feel it would be unfair to you to hide it. I don’t even think the translator was trying to be insulting to anyone, it was just a very poor judgment call that ended up messing with canon and creating an unfortunate situation for no reason. Know that we here at the Translarison say “Trans Rights!” and “Intersex Rights!” and I know damn well that the FFVIII cast does as well, awkward translations be damned.
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With that out of the way, back to business. Edea mentions that she received her powers at the age of 5. This seems to confirm that she was already a sorceress before reciving Ultimecia’s powers. There is also a difference in translations as in English, she says that she received her powers from “the previous sorceress” which sounds like there can only be one at a time (which is immediately contradicted by them bringing up Adel).
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Next, when Squall brings up Linoa, his English self says that her body was called and she wasn’t moving, so no wonder Cid took it to mean that Linoa died. However, his French self says that she “fell into a deep coma”, which IS accurate, but also makes it weird that Cid still has the same reaction.
Speaking of him, his reply to Squall sounds more tactful in French to me.
English:
“Squall, I understand how you feel. But you are in a position of leadership. The other students at garden have a right to know the outcome of the battle and what’s to come. Take whatever information you can get here, back to Garden. Remember, it wasn’t just Linoa. Everyone fought.”
French:
Squall, I understand that all this is emotionally exhausting for you. But think about your role as leader. The BGU students are relying on you. You mustn’t forget about the fate of your comrades. Linoa’s life isn’t the only one on the line.
And after Squall says “I understand, but...”, Cid still comes off better in French, as English Cid retorts “But, but, but... that isn’t something a leader should say...” which sounds horribly dismissive, while French Cid says “No ‘buts’. A true leader forgets his personal issues...” which not only feels less dismissive IMO, but also seems to refer back to his own actions, as he had to train SeeD to fight Edea in spite of his own feelings.
Oh, and when punching the wall afterwards, French Squall thinks “...... Fool” and I’m honestly not sure if he’s referring to Cid or himself.
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There aren’t many differences while Edea explains Ultimecia’s goal and Squall reminisces about Linoa, but there is an interesting one. In English, when someone asks what would happen to the world if time was compressed, someone else answers “I can’t even imagine a world where time is compressed!”.
In French, Edea (presumably) clearly answers “If time is compressed, we will all plunge into nothingness.
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And as the game fades back to Balamb Garden, we end with Xu a.k.a. Shu. In English, she tells Squall “I don’t want to say this in front of Quistis and you, but... I don’t know if some people will be so forgiving”. In French, she doesn’t actually speak directly to Squall, whispring to herself “Squall and Quistis are too king with the priestess. I’ve got the feeling that the others won’t forgive her so easily”. And yes, it’s a whisper because it’s not using the transparent text box.
Well, that is it for our first entry back. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did (the weird Adel stuff notwithstanding) and that you’re looking forward to more, I know I am. Don’t hesitate to let me know what you think of it and if you have any questions, my asks are open and of course you can leave them as a comment if you prefer.
Take care and I’ll be seeing you for part 26. No promises on when it’ll be out, but hopefully before another four years.
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First day of classes and I'm already drained 💔 last night I was too anxious and I only got like two hours of sleep. Aside from that, first day was kind of bad. I missed almost all questions and I had to talk to my teachers since I'm not gonna be able to attend all classes because of my job (I hate working and studying at the same time). Pretty much, bad beginning. Hoping for a better tomorrow 🤞
Things I did today:
- Attending all classes and talking notes.
- Started reading Call Down The Hawk, by Maggie Stiefvater.
- Painted my nails.
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alixismix · 10 months
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bluefishbaby · 5 days
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