#oh how i miss you so /pos /neg | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

weabooweedwitch · 1 year

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Different anon here, I really appreciate when you vent here. Yeah you don't have perfect thoughts, you're not a self-sacrificing saint of patience and virtue, but seeing someone let out those thoughts without worrying about always seeming like the objectively correct person in every single situation is very liberating to me personally. I've been in a very similar family situation, and I also know I was not an angel in those circumstances either. Seeing someone else willing to talk about the nitty gritty shit instead of just "oh woah is me for they are toxic and I am but a fragile victim" fuck ESPECIALLY after you got raided for it? You're brave as fuck, brutally honest as fuck, and anyone can respect your feelings, but fuck I respect YOU. I hope you're able to cut ties eventually and live a more fulfilling life, my life didn't feel like it started until I was able to break free. I'll hold out hope for you :) (and also keep an eye out if you ever decide to take comms again because I totally missed that and would've jumped on it.)

I mean don't get me wrong, I do think and kind of analyze how I must be perceived when I say certain things, not in the sense that I adjust what I say but more so internally thinkg "I probably sound like a POS right now" but like, since part of the reason I vent is for, I guess, to help clarify certain things and, get feedback if people feel the urge to, that only comes from being honest, idk? Like I guess, not that I'm really saying this is her fault, but my mom told me "oh they only believe you because they plonly heard YOUR story" so many times I just settled into "ok well if I tell EVERYTHING as I can remember it, then I'll have more information to tell if I was right or wrong".

Like for sure I definitely overshare a lot but I also try and genuinely use it not just as comfort and just, letting loose of those negative feelings, but it's also like I guess, a diagnostic tool to gauge the situation? Idk does that make sense? Like sure I COULD write in a diary that only I can see, but would that help me realize if I'm making a mistake or if I AM the victim? Does that "answer" my racing anxious thoughts? It's like that. It's like a problem I'm trying to find the solution for.

Tbh me continuing to vent after the whole raid thing is kind of in itself a very co-dependant behavior on my part because it's sort of like, I am directly making myself a target for people to potentially really try and wound me, but it's also like, the pain of having to keep everything inside and not knowing "what I'm supposed to think" or if I'm right or wrong or, even just not being heard is really much more painful to me. The doubt and curiosity and guilt for, so many things in my life can literally eat me alive sometimes.

And I even recognize that my mom has done and tried a lot for me, more than a lot of other parents. But that also doesn't erase a lot of the issues we have? Like even if I learn to calm myself down and act more, I guess, appropriately, I would still be constantly hurt by these behaviors of hers? It would still be incredibly stressful to see her scold me for things she does all the time, and I'm still upset about how I can't even go "please don't interrupt me" and her immediate response being "but YOU interrupt ME all the time" like there is definitely a mutual respect and self improving that needs to go on, I by no means consider myself perfect in any way but I will say that I consider myself better than her at reading poeple and trying to behave appropriately and empathetically. one thing that had bonded us when I was younger was, it sounds fucked up in hindsight but when we were having so many problems with my sister we would be discussing like, what do we do, how do we act around her, hey did you notice that thing she did that might be a symptom, and my mom would tell me I was so so good at predicting how my sister would respond, not even inherently in a manipulative way, like I would go "im afraid if we tell her XYZ that that will only make her angry and she won't want to talk to us" and even with these recent stressful events with her, she praised me for being able to try and communicate with my sister as best I could and even after, like, that really stressful awful visit, she turns to me and says "you were right, you were totally right, she did exactly what you thought she would do"

And its like, I just wish, she respected me enough to try and give some credence and, idk, if im smart enough when talking about everything else, why am I never smart enough when I say "hey mom this thing you did, i think was wrong and it hurt me" or even just "hey mom please don't do that thing, I think that's really irresponsible and could backfire on us" and she just gets defensive. Like, to list an example of something that doesnt even have to do sith our relationship, she says I criticize her driving too much (which I totally admit I can do sometimes, I've been having nightmares since childhood involving being in the car and I'm naturally anxious in cars) but like then I can list examples of "hey mom when you turned left at that light you literally swung over so early you were briefly in the oncoming traffic lane and crossed over the double yellow line to get into your lane, you should drive farther forward and THEN turn, i see you do this almost every day" and its just automatically "ugh Miranda it's every day with you, I can't do one single thing right"

It's almost like you know, I'm losing my patience because she won't like review her actions, and then I have to bring things up all the time, and then she just feels attacked because I'm bringing them up all the time and this almost stubbornly refuses to do anything about it almost out of spite it feels like, which then just. Makes me more impatient and call those things out more.

And on another note, like I constantly whiplash between "God she drives me crazy, I hate her, she doesn't deserve my respect, she's stupid, i have to run away and never ever see or talk to her again" to "no I want to hug my mom and tell her about all these interesting things I've read and us watch TV together and smoke together and I'll miss her when I'm gone, I have to have to HAVE TO try and fix this before it's too late because what happened between her and HER mom has done so much damage to her". We might have a bad argument where I say shitty things to her and she says shitty things to me and we could be in the car as she drives me to work and I might try and make some small talk because, idk maybe it's BPD or mood regulation but sometimes I can move on from things quickly, and she'll just give me the silent treatment or reply with something snarky and I'll think "yeah I guess I deserve that"

And other things i worry about are like, when I was living in Florida with roommates there was an incident where she slipped and fell on the ice and she had horrible body aches and was struggling to go to the store and buy food for herself and I was panicking and wanting to try and have food delivered for her? She sometimes struggles to take the trash out because she needs her knees replaced and she's kind of, always had chronic issues she's still trying to find the cause for, and like, before this recent round of our relationship getting worse we had been discussing trying to get a first time homeowners loan together so we could finally settle down somewhere and have permanant housing, something that was OURS, no more apartments, no more awful neighbors

But those things are only possible if we can work together and both of us have issues? Both of us have our own problems that have to be worked on, and, I often wonder if either one of us are just "stuck in our ways" but there are so many times where, like, obviously money is a factor but there are so many times I'm not seriously looking into moving out not just because I'm scared of being on my own but also scared of leaving her by herself and scared that, what if we break that bond and never see each other again and suddenly one of us gets into an accident or she gets sick or, you know?

And on a flipside of that, while I was living away and paying my own bills and having you know my first ever job, she needed to borrow money from me a few times and it kind of devastated me because I thought, "oh I'm finally away and taking time for myself and she's still having trouble handling things, why can't I be allowed to focus on me, have time for me, have money for ME" because like. I do consider myself a caring and empathetic person but a lot of situations were pretty much forced on me where I had to expend myself or at least my mental energy on her specifically till I just felt, empty and unappreciated and used up.

I also recognize my mom wanting to use me as a friend and therapist also stems from issues she has with being able to trust and maintain relationships with other people but that's unfortunately a thing only really she and a counselor or something can focus on. I shouldn't have been tasked with, well, by her own admission there were many times where I was her sole pillar of emotional and psychological support and that was. That was such a heavy weight on a kids shoulders? And it eventually got to the point where I would say "hey mom sometimes i feel like you only talk to me when you need something or have to complain" and she'd brush me off until, I reached an age where I would tell her straight to her face "I don't care" because she wouldn't let me set those boundaries where her venting to me was a consensual thing, it eventually became "obligatory" and it'd literally be her like, talking and talking where you haven't said anything for like 5 or 10 minutes straight and I would see her do this to my grandma to the point my grandma would literally hold the phone away from her ear and occasionally only "check back" to see if she was still going.

Like when I try and step back and look at things analytically, I think a lot of this anger and resentment in me stems specifically from my pre-teen/teen years. I was still a kid and still emotionally vulnerable and, you know, not fully developed and needing my own help, but I was mentally and emotionally "mature" enough that my mom often confided a lot in me, and even later on she admitted she tried to treat me more as a friend than as a mom, but, it got to a point where I was a huge source of support to her in ways that were damaging to me. Like jesus when I first started working and me and my mom would like, talk about my day and my problems with coworkers, I remember, I so vividly remember thinking "gosh it's sure nice to like actually be able to understand this stuff now" because I would be in elementary or middle school and she'd be talking about complex inter-work issues I literally couldn't understand? I couldn't even understand or become invested in what she was trying to say and then "wasn't allowed" to disengage from the subject. I would be in a car with her liyerallt wanting to bail out onto the road because she'd be talking and talking and not even checking if you're listening or following along

I just. I constantly have to ask myself if this is a situation that can br permanantly improved and "be normal" and, that's going to take work from both of us, and unfortunately both of us are pretty good at finding excuses

#readmore for length. i gotta remember to trim these a bit

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gogolstoelicker · 2 years

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Can you do a cyan reader from show by rock for twst boys. also what animes have you watched I’d like to know?

Twisted Wonderland with a Cyan!MC

notes: •honestly i don't watch anime much since i kind of lose interest easily KSKSKS (i might missed some but) i think I've watched owari no seraph, bungo stray dogs, yuukoku no moriarty, vanitas no carte(?), assassination classroom, fairy tail, death note and karnival(i think I'm missing smth so I'll be adding if i remember)

•and i honestly read manhwas more (e: the return of the 8th class magician, who made me a princess etc)

•pls tell me i got her character right

Heartslabyul:

YOU'RE IN A BAND BEFORE???? WELL, HE IS HERE TO PROMOTE HIS CLUB;D

as soon as cater mentioned abt being in a band, your full attention is on him and he had never been more than happy

will tell u abt the club and will ask u to consider joining them (since they're in desperate need of a new member)

immediate relief when u actually join them not too long after

the one who spread you were an idol in ur world (probably how a certain someone finds out too)

tries to get a pic with u EVERYTIME

#withmyfavidol #chilling #theysofab😘

someone pls stop him

that someone being trey and riddle so yey⁉️

trey is more than happy to have u around

he knows cats have bad breathe (my cats.) so he made sure u took care of that

would take away ur pastries privileges if u refuse to take care of ur mouth

riddle is quite curious abt u

and he really likes ur style too!!

ur personality is smth he really likes and appreciates

tho, it would get on his nerves if you're against him since he's not really good with retaliation

ace and deuce experiments on u

actually, it was all ace's idea

deuce thought it was bad but got convinced into ace's plan

yknow that one grass that people wave around for cats to play with? yeah thats them

guess who lost their heads btw

Savanaclaw:

you have animal ears, they have animal ears

kinship???? /JOKE

anyways u probably have ur cat nap with leona sometimes

cat things ig

ruggie shitting tears bc now he have two people to wake up

well at least u dont take a nap every second and is hard to wake up unlike a certain someone

sometimes takes advantage of how you never suspects anyone but shh🤫 u didn't hear that from him

Jack is the one who suspects people for u

will be the one on the lookout for anyone that's trying to take advantage of ur gentle personality and how u never suspect anyone of anything bad

sometimes prays that u will so that u won't get into anything bad (COUGH COUGH azul's deal COUGH COUGH)

insists that he's only doing this for repayment of that thing with savanaclaw evil plan to win some sports

he lied, we all know he did, he actually enjoyed ur company

cheers u on abt u being in a band

in his own way ofc, he's not gonna be THAT obvious🙄🙄*proceeds to be exact that*

sometimes if u invite him, he will actually make time to attend one of ur concerts

u didn't hear this from me tho

leona? leona.

he doesn't care much

just a fellow cat, nothing much here

tho u are a breathe of fresh air from what he's used to

he quite enjoys ur company too but he would rather die than admit it

he especially enjoy ur afternoon cat naps together

Octavinelle:

doesn't matter what species u are, floyd will always want to squeeze u /pos

/neg if u hate being squeezed or just dislike physical touch

azul is like 🤔 hm. maybe we need a performer in here don't you think?

and then stare right into ur soul👁👁

fret not, he'll pay you!! will even prepare anything necessary for ur performance!

the deal is set and now u occasionally perform in monstro lounge

sometimes floyd tried to join in but jade grabbed him by the collar and made sure he does not step foot on the stage

jade is the mad scientist that tried to study u

u are technically a cat🤔do u play what cats play? do u eat those cat foods? can cats like u perhaps... eat mushrooms?👁👁

oh no run

don't worry! azul is here to save u!

by grabbing u by the collar and running away from jade who have his mushroom food in one hand

even floyd ran away, sometimes he'll hoist u up in the air and just carry u like a sack and run like that

speaking of which, they, azul specifically, likes ur personality

esp if u gave a honest feedback on smth for the lounge or them as a person

and ue gentleness is more than welcomed‼️

floyd specifically liked that abt u‼️

Scarabia:

HELLO‼️‼️‼️‼️- kalim to you

jamil trying to shush him bc he's yelling too loud in the hallways

kalim tried to get you to join the light music club!

he even gave u a tour and introduced u to who's the members‼️

he even tried to state the pros and cons of joining them‼️

which doesn't really take much convincing bc u literally said yes

one performance in and so suddenly yall got famous

so famous, other schools even heard of y'all and majority are yalls fans🤔

kalim is more excited than the whole group combined about that

now he believes you're their lucky charm

uh oh

better start asking jamil to turn that belief around

speaking of jamil, he's more than happy to have u around

you're not too loud and is up to troubles like a certain someone he knows and is actually prettu gentle

you're a breathe of fresh air

tho your straightforwardness might get on his nerves a bit🤔

just a bit tho

mostly when u disagree with him

other than that, totally no problems with u

more than happy to leave kalim in ur capable hands as he go and get his rest for once

also!! he's really happy how u still see him as him and not as kalim's shadow

it was really much appreciated that he just

Pomefiore:

oh vil and rook loves your style

gothic lolita??? and u look SO good in it???? MMM.

maybe u wanna join their dorm? hahaha that was a joke that was a joke

or was it.

if u asked, they'll be more than happy to dress u up😁

they got all the frills and ribbons here just. just come over.

don't play with the ribbons tho, this is a warning from vil

he appreciates that you're honest and would give a honest feedback abt smth he asked or with how he dolled u up

he's a celebrity and you're apparently in a band with the light music club that got so popular so suddenly so he can understand if u feel stress etc and would actually offer a spa day‼️

rook watching u from above the trees almost everyday like👁👁

u wondering why is ur senses tingling like someone is watching u or smth🤔

rook actually wrote u a poem sometimes to just appreciate u

someone needs to drag him away bc his poem seems like it will never end

felines(?) should be strong too right??🤔 - epel's first impression

you're strong or not, who knows. just show epel and we'll know ig

actually had his eyes on ur ears like 👁👁

like father like son ig (rook is the dad, no u can't argue with me on this one)

it looks soft so like uh one soft pat?😁pls?😁

likes ur gentle personality actually, that way, he can look and be manlier next to you

when uh, vil isn't around ofc

Ignihyde:

idia going ballistic bc omg!! someone who's in a band who's actually good at singing and actually had sone experience and is actually really good and is ac-

we get it idia:/

actually vibrates in his seat when u turn to look at the tablet he used to go to school

like wow! his idol is looking right at him!

yes, it's a tablet but it's his tablet so you have technically noticed him;D!

don't even ask how u became his idol so quick

probably the one who spreads about u that u just became so popular even outside of school

you're welcome btw

ortho is happy to have a new friend!

he doesn't have many felines or beastman friends (since the savanaclaw people are not really the friendliest), so he's happy that he got u as a friend!

he sometimes watch some youtube videos abt cats and what they play and test it on u🤔

like laser? those feather on a idk string???

probably a bridge for u and idia to start talking too

since he noticed how much of a big fan his brother is of you🤔

idia at first was a mess, he can barely get a word out

but at least he got that autograph💪‼️ (and picture he screenshot from the cctv HELP)

u might need to give him a few weeks for him to even start talking to u normally

Diasomnia:

goth with the goths

you were in a band back in ur world? kewl, how about u join the light music club and be in another band with mister lilia vanrouge over here;D~?!

definitely tries to get u to join the light music club, which does not take long bc u said yes abt it right away to being in a band🤔

since u like to shop for antiques, he is more than happy to indulge u in it!

lilia had lived for thousands of years, of course he have seen and own some antiques himself!

he's even more than happy to explain their history if it have some or maybe the artist if its a piece of art

since you're a cat, lilia had so much fun playing around with u

literally tried to test if you're just like a cat by pointing laser so u can chase it

sebek does think you're talented and made sure you know of it

may or may not have tried getting u to write a song about malleus but shh

he appreciates talents and is not afraid to let you know of it, even as an anti human

he also appreciates that you're honest, that way he can trust u more🤔‼️

i legit do not know how to write more for sebek

just think of sebek as a big chunky protector of his cat friend prefect with their cat monster

silver? silver (silver coloured emoji)

he likes your gentle personality

sometimes, he fell asleep in ur presence

like "oh its prefe- zzzzz"

can u blame him? it's soothing and a breathe of fresh air from what he's used to seeing and tolerating

malleus? over the moon.

like you're gentle and straightforward? 🤩🤩🤩🤩😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

he is just so happy to have u as a friend that he almost brought u a new instrument as a gift

oh he's more than happy to indulge u in some antiques he personally knows too

while he has not live for as long as lilia or travelled the world like him, he does know his fair share of antiques stuff in his long life

would even gift u them if u asked

if you allow it, he'll pet ur ears😁pls.

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carpedzem · 3 years

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I saw a while ago you got an ask from an anon asking for loveposting of Dream, and I was wondering if you could do it again but of just cc!Dream? For some reason, I'm getting a lot of baseless takes saying that Dream was totally responsible for Gee's harassment and he's trying to control twt by "taking away their freedom of speech" all over my dash and its both confusing and a little hurtful bc I've tagged cw negative but nobody tags their posts correctly, and besides, Dream is very vocal about his covid warrior takes, and I was hoping you could flood my dash with cc!dream positivity because I love him /parasocial

oh boy, nonny, it looks like you need a better people to follow o.o

first of all Dream is not responsible for Gee's harassment, if anything he could say nothing but chose to step in to save CC's asses even if we can assume he didn't support the idea. that control twt thing I don't even want to touch, it's just stupid. okay, with this out of our way ✨ love posting time! ✨

this is based on assumptions only but the possibility that he had The Talk tm with George about the party and still wrote that answer on twt, to make situation better. damn, he really loves his friends :')

Dream Covid Warrior We Stan

Change My Clothes is sooo??? <333 gods I love this song and I love that he has a chance to work with music and with artist he respect. and this song is so smoothing. lyrics are a little sad but also so hopeful

You miss all of the shots that you don't take :)

his recent irl content! it's not only h*t but also it's something endearing seeing he is, in fact, real person. I saw somewhere post that it also might be him getting used to being in front of camera and this makes me so soft :')

cargo pants were sent to him, why are we Like This, and he decided, yes, I'm going to do photo session with them, why is he Like This /pos

Dream's and Sapnap's friendships gives me so much feelings recently, they love each other so much, I'm so happy they can live together and see each other on daily basic and send themselves memes even if they are in the same house

the way he sometimes just hop on twt to cause chaos??? this is so funny. why did he 'bullied' his fan? why does he have 176 nipples? why did he 😳 Punz's ratio? and remember, he has a house

That Suit tm

when he says "Hi!", or giggle <3

the fact that he saves funny photos of his friends just to send them! and that he scrolls old messages and finds funny bits. he just, he loves them so much

he liked Tommy idea about where Manhunt should start and used it!

his "Well-" <3

I don't know if I ever talk about it but I absolutely love Quackity's stream when he was Dream's therapist. It's so funny, I find myself rewatching it once in a while. comfort stream for sure :)

on one of Puffy stream, when he was talking about beginning of DSMP and how long they all know each other! and the fact that DSMP brought dteam and Punz together again! gods, this is such a wonderful story, looking at how often they appear at each other streams like, this makes me so soft :>

just... he <3

#nonny #dreamwastaken #i tried to come up with a new ones I hope you like it! :D #also LMAO nonny dont make me start on freaking tagging in this fandom #hate hate hate anger

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minecraftrelatedrandomness · 3 years

Text

Aqua’s Live Reactions: “Quackity Visits Dream and Technoblade in Prison”

So... as it turns out, time zones, sleep, school and more school do not mix well with DSMP lore, since I’m currently typing the start of this post during my lunch break about 11 hours after the lore drop - the lore drop happened less than an hour before I was gonna sleep (which is already a fucked up sleep schedule on my part), so obviously I couldn’t watch the damn lore stream... and like 4 people did a loredrop today, so I’m prioritizing c!Quackity POV above c!Techno POV (might watch c!Techno POV later) and reacting to his side of the story first. Oh, and this is posted more than 11 hours after the lore drop because I have supplementary classes after school, mandatory school-sanctioned stuff, and I’m not risking a truancy record for the lore streams, especially NOT during my final year at secondary school.

Here’s a disclaimer: I’m watching the VOD and know next to nothing that has happened because I refused to check my notifications for over 12 hours just so I can get a genuine reaction out of this. I might have caught a glimpse of a spoiler while I was barely awake, but outside of trigger warnings that I asked for and that the TV Tropes (iconic/signature) quotes page has updated, that’s about it.

This whole post is within the context of the SMP, so /rp and /dsmp applies to everything under the cut.

0:00 - Since I’m watching the VOD, I get to see the comments in full glory. cc!Quackity has commented “oh no”. Oh no indeed. I am not sure what to expect. Something has happened, and it is bad, I can feel the vibes. Also, the comments have spoilers. Rough times.

0:14 - The netherite axe has so low durability......

0:20 - Holy shit, the shears are named “Wardens Torment”. They actually named the shears to be a torture implement

0:33 - Q why do you have like 5 bottles of enchanting, I don’t know what that’s for but I think it’s plot relevant in some way

0:58 - “ringing that stupid bell” LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THE BELL FROM THE LAST VISIT!!!!! TECHNO YOU CHEEKY BASTARD /pos

1:35 - “This is the most secure place on the entire server” and what if the nuke is hidden there? The missing Snowchester nuke? It’s just a theory, but I’m in the mood for a conspiracy at the moment

1:54 - “the point is the revival book” no it isn’t, you said it yourself in the last big lore stream

2:19 - “there’s two of them and one of me” yeah, q, i know. i know you. your weaknesses. and how you suppressed one of your own strengths to be able to do this shit. i know all about you.

2:25 - “they could do anything” ...paranoid tendencies much? I mean you’re right to be wary but still...

2:33 - really? an ad at this time? ffs the number of ads on youtube has only gone up since covid started........ i hate it here /neg

2:50 - “sleep. just in case something bad happens” oh i know..... this sounds like foreshadowing

2:55 - THE BELL SAD;FJASL;KJS;DALKFJAS;ZDJFAS;ZLDFKJAS; LMAOOOO WE CAN HEAR IT FROM BEYOND THE LAVA CURTAIN THIS IS AMAZING

3:14 - “it’s a long story” oh does sam know about dreamxd now?

3:35 - “I hope this is the last time I have to be here” oh q........ there’s some meaning behind this quote. i know it. but for the life of me, i can’t figure it out yet... does this mean you want to kill the two fuckers in there or something? you know techno has like all 3 of his lives intact, right? he’s gonna... well, I think you know what happened the last time you tried to knock him down a peg

3:46 - “it’s for the good of the country as well” ah yes so las nevadas is aligned with the prison officially? police state /j i mean it’s always been unofficially there but still...

4:30 - ah, so he admits it

4:32 - HOW DID THEY GET A DOG?? I understand q’s reaction fully. “What” indeed.

4:40 - sam’s right, the lava is acting weird. did dream and techno sabotage it or something? I remember how techno’s last couple of streams ended, or at least I’ve heard enough about it........... i think it’s sabotage

5:08 - “<Technoblade> cringe” LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IT’S SO TYPICAL OF HIM. HE’S BACK. MY LITTLE OINK OINK. /HJ

5:31 - oh so now DREAM is onto something? what do you MEAN you don’t have time and to hurry up?? do they have a plan in there or something? i know this episode is a jailbreak waiting to happen but there’s something bigger at play here, I feel

5:52 - LMAOOOOOO WAIT. WAIT. DREAM STILL HAS HIS LAVENDER RIBBON FROM THE LAST MCC ON. HOW DOES THIS MAKE SENSE IN A CANONICAL WAY. HOW. EXPLAIN.

5:53 - also sam WHAT DO YOU MEAN TO “KILL THE DOG”??? THAT’S A WHOLE PUPPER IN THERE. I mean I don’t sympathize much with c!Dream or c!Techno that much but I want to know how tf the dog got in there first at least

5:56 - q says “i’m not gonna kill a puppy-” sam says to kill the dog. well at least someone here has a semblance of morals here /j

6:28 - oh so it begins... he’s here... this is gonna be fun /s

6:44 - TECHNO DOESN’T KNOW WHY THE DOG IS THERE EITHER LMAO THIS IS RICH THIS IS EPIC

6:59 - love how they’re all just attached to the dog now. great job everyone (sincerely)... except dream. we know he refuses to name the dog because he thinks attachments are gross. we all know that.

7:07 - “let’s call it rat” RAT IS CANON LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

7:14 - “i would never respect someone who named their dog ‘rat’.” ok so is this make fun of bbh week now?? irl “rat” is just a nickname but everyone calls her that so-

7:23 - did techno seriously just try to knock him into the lava??

7:46 - ok so sam is pointing a bow at the jail squad- yeah... why. he has a good question. why, sir warden, why?

9:32 - ah. leverage. i see what you did. as if we all didn’t know from the start.

9:55 - LMAO. hostage situation that’s a win-win, and techno... we all know both of you can strangle this man with your bare hands. also the last time you tried to kill techno, we all saw what happened. /hj

10:00 - “that’s kinda harsh” no shit sherlock also HOW NONCHALANT DO YOU HAVE TO BE FOR THIS

10:08 - “Don’t do it.” Techno, you’re just feeding the toxic Rivals Duo fans at this point. Also, are you just trying to preserve your reputation of “never dying” or do you genuinely care? Because I doubt you do tbh...

10:38 - ads. gross.

10:46 - “doesn’t that kinda work out?” yeah, techno, point out the holes in q’s plans. I might disagree with your moral standpoint and compass but I’m allowed to find you funny and cool... yeah I love him too, my snarky boi

11:14 - looks like someone finally had the common sense to roast the potatoes over the lava.

11:23 - I’m just imagining the scenario in-universe because if we’re going by characters’ canon heights (plus some speculation for c!techno based on his cc’s height irl), c!quackity is the shortest one of the three so him threatening the other two is ngl a weirdly funny sight to see

11:42 - and that’s the point, dream. quackity gets the revive-book, and the whole server can be rid of you. that’s the point, good sir. we don’t want you here.

12:23 - q you’re sounding borderline hysterical here. you’re sounding almost desperate. i don’t know if this is intentional or not but you’re sounding... vulnerable.

14:08 - we all saw through that, both in and out of universe. you’re making it very obvious that you don’t want dream to give him the book, techno.

14:40 - y’all sounding half hysterical at this point

15:36 - ah yes trauma dumping time /hj /rp

15:52 - oh so he wants poetic justice, huh? should have gone the whole hog and brought a netherite pick instead of a diamond one.

15:59 - he’s gone. he’s fuckin’ gone. just before he could actually do the pickaxe thing. holy shit. lmao... in all seriousness though, I heard Techno was gonna get out earlier... I’m guessing through the enderpearl stasis chambers or whatever? this is gonna be fun..................

16:34 - i love how c!dream is still eating raw fukin’ potatoes. we all saw techno with cooked ones, right? why’s he still eating it raw? tell me

16:58 - “bring back the fridge” sir it’s in a dumpster, your honour

18:58 - ANOTHER AD??

19:53 - “if he could have escaped all this time then why didn’t he escape earlier” the will.............. philza opened it up,..... we called it, it was time

20:10 - bruh. can’t see the green boy. is he gone? i doubt it.

20:20 - the toilet. check the toilet. shawshank redemption or whatever it’s called, I’ve only heard of hamshank redemption from angry birds toons but check the fuckin’ loo, the toilet

21:10 - q is still hysterical, sam is still in denial, techno is probably back in the arctic, and my bet is that dream currently smells like shit in the most literal way

22:04 - oh no. loud noises. is this the alarm trigger warning I’ve heard of?

23:35 - what the fuck are those ender pearls doing there

23:50 - what’s to bet those are barrier blocks or something?

26:02 - underground base???!! also internal monologue time???!!!!

26:24 - ah. dramatic music.

26:55 - time is ticking..............

27:02 - battle log................

27:07 - “las nevadas has become a prime target”... for what? whose pov is this again?

27:11 - “dream has escaped prison” first of all, I doubt it, and second of all, ah ok, c!q pov still

27:28 - paranoia?? descent into paranoia?

27:43 - it’s raining outside las nevadas...........

27:47 - yo. yo this is huge. the lore drought has finally ended with the rain. also this was epic.

#aqua live reacts #dream smp #pandoras vault #technoblade #dream #quackity #awesamdude #my post #15 september 2021 #tw loud noises #tw violence mention #tw torture mention #dream smp spoilers

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k0kichiimagines · 2 years

Note

OH MY GAWD THERE'S ONES WITH SAEYOUNG TOO?? AHDHWHDHWHDHWHDHS /NEG

I personally can never really see Saeran as a love interest cuz I love Saeyoung with all ma heart and he actually helped me learn to love again (even though I don't rlly wanna be in relationships irl anymore) but ngl having Saeran as a brother-in-law sounds good SKSKSKS

No matter who you choose, you got an amazing brother-in-law basically lolol

I also read this one where Saeran keeps having dreams about you and he couldn't help but fall in love and poor boi wakes up having like breakdowns and stuff and IT HURT LIKE A B I T C H!!!

At the end where you and Saeyoung left for a date, he goes back to sleep to keep dreaming about you and sprays your perfume at a pillow so it has your scent basically and that broke me omg ajdbahdhwh it was actually the first fic I read where Saeran is secretly in love with you hhhhh!!! I can give you the link if you want! The writing was nice too!!

At my comfort universe, I think that Saeran got over it and is now glad to see his brother happy and they both have this relationship where they are playful with each other and Saeran even likes having him around. I read a fic recently where Saeran started having bad flashbacks and Saeyoung and you basically hug him and he calms down since he feels you two near him and it ends with you three cuddling on the couch HHHHHSHDHWHDWH!!!!

This one other fic, he was actually jealous of Saeyoung and when the power went out and you were cold, Saeran brings a blanket and covers you. He feels good when you leaned onto him, wrapping his arms around your waist and Saeyoung pouts and joins the cuddling pile too sksksks

I have the link to both fics thankfully!!

Also about parent headcanons and stuff like that. I personally never want to have kids but imagine with Saeyoung like he would be that kind of dad where he lets his kids get away with everything and more LMFAO, he is literally the only character who I wouldn't mind becoming parents with AND ALSO!! UNCLE SAERAN!!! MY DUDE HAS THE MOST PLAIN FACE AND HE TAKES CARE OF HIS BROS CHILD WITH NO PROBLEM AND IS THAT ONE CHILL COUSIN, NOT TO MENTION VANDERWOOD IS THERE TOO AJDHAHDHWHE /POS

Saeyoung brainrot Saeyoung brainrot Saeyoung brainrot Saeyoung brainrot Saeyoung brainrot Saeyoung brainrot Saeyoung brainrot!!!!!!!!

ohhh please do! itll break my heart but i like the angstsobs

AW THATS CUTE i love seeing the choi twins happy, in every end i just want to see them happy ♡♡

saeran likes to tease saeyoung by declaring he prefers his in law to his actual sibling as well, you two become besties frfr

saeran is the calm uncle fr, he's just showing them the garden and playing a few games

saeyoung is kinda father / uncle to be yelling aeroplane noises and running around in circles with the child on his shoulders, hyper energy, children simply love the mad

i feel like saeyoung doesnt mind having kids or not having them! he considers you and saeran (and miss vanderwood no matter how much he protests) to be his family, he's happy this family is safe ♥️

also you have cat children i dont make the rules he brings home a litter of kittens they're the family now KDHRJFN

#💌... stormflypriateskin #💌... mail

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gainaxvel3o · 4 years

Text

A Miraculous Tale of Rubybug and Cat Blake Chapter 3

Previous / First / Next

If I don’t, who will?

Glynda Goodwitch was never one for tardiness.

Every year she'd get a new batch of students and they would all be the same. On one hand you have the lazy and unmotivated, the ones who coasted through high school and came here expecting an easy grade.

On the other hand, you have the tired and unfocused. These people struggled to get into Beacon and feel the weigh of expectations thrust upon them. They fear that they will not be able to pos the grade with even a C.

The last group are the ones she both loved and feared. These students are eager, motivated and ready. They are fearless in the face of error and have so much potential ripe to be unlocked.

The common factor among these groups was that they all needed discipline. And she would show them that discipline.

Glynda would most certainly do that for the girl who walked into the room just as she was in the middle of her lecture.

"Good of you to join us Miss Rose," She said. "Take your seat."

Ruby nodded, clearly embarrassed over being called out like this. Glynda wasn't sure which of the groups she fit in yet. She could only hope that the short girl learned her lesson.

"You will be taking your seat next to- OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YOU TWO STOP THAT!"

A pair of girls interrupted their passionate make out session to look at their teacher. One of them had long brown haired and blushed furiously at Glynda's outburst. The other one, who had a black beret on her head and a pair of sunglasses, only smirked.

"Sorry teach," Sunglasses girl adjusted them. "We just couldn't keep to ourselves this time."

Glynda was not amused. "Well since you clearly can't manage such a basic task, then you won't mind if I have Miss Rose take Scarletina's seat?"

"I… well." The shy girl said. "No it won't be a problem Miss Goodwitch."

She moved up from her seat, Ruby taking her place on it. The shy girl had to sit next to Ruby, a desk apart from Sunglasses Girl.

Yang had asked her to make friends this year. Ruby felt she was pretty lucky yesterday, Weiss aside. Maybe this time might also work?

"…Hi!" Ruby said whispering to the shy girl. "I'm Ruby?"

She really hoped she wouldn't get yelled at.

"Huh? I'm Velvet. Velvet Scarletina." The shy girl smiled. "Pleased to meet you."

Oh thank God it was another nice one. However, before any more conversation could be said, Glynda had already returned to the lecture.

"We have only 20 minutes before class ends, so pay attention." Ms Goodwitch said to the students. "The Fashion Industry is a harsh and cruel place where only talent and luck will save you. Thousands enter but only few make it to the top. Because of that, we need to perfect our skills to stand out among the crowd."

Ruby took out a pen and wrote down on her notebook. She was already late, but maybe she could get this right. Something had to go right today…

_______________________________________________________________________

After class ended, Ruby made a bee line for the bathroom.

No one was there (which was odd but she rolled with it), so Ruby rubbed the earrings. Out from them came Tikki, who looked concerned.

"Ruby!" She screamed. "I was so worried did something happened?!"

The girl was forlorn. She sighed sadly.

"I'm so sorry Tikki," Ruby said. "I went to look for Nooro but therewasthisbadguyandheturnedpeopleintomonstersandIcouldn't-"

"Slow down Ruby!" Tikki waved her stubby arms in front of her chosen. "I couldn't understand… did you say monsters?"

She nodded. "Yeah… that bad guy I beat up the yesterday, Roman… he had this tacky bowler hat and awful eyeliner and was calling himself Chadwick (like that Pinocchio character) and he turned all the prisoners into these… these donkey people! It was horrible!"

"Donkey… people…?" Tikki tilted her head in confusion. "Now I know something is strange, Nooro is a kind Kwami. His powers shouldn't be able to be used for evil gain."

Ruby herself had question marks written on her face.

"If that's true then how comes Roman was able to get this power?"

"Because he wasn't." Tikki said. "He was borrowing it from whoever is Nooro's chosen… they wee wielding dark power."

"Dark power?" Ruby asked, "What do you mean?"

The red Kwami hesitated. She closed her eyes, ha an utterly serious look on her face. It was the first time Ruby had seen her truly afraid. It worried her immensely.

"Ruby, this is more serious than I thought. The power… it's similar to an ancient evil that me and the previous Miraculous users faced before. When we lost the butterfly miraculous we just thought it was broken. That would have been preferable to this."

Tikki opened her eyes, a fierce glare.

"Nooro's power has been corrupted by the Grimm."

Ruby scratched the back of her head. "Okay… And who are they exactly?"

A few seconds pass.

"Oh right. You don't know the legends…" Tikki blushed a little. However, she regained her composure. "The Grimm were terrible things… evil things. They fed on the negative feelings human beings have and used it to become stronger. Nooro is the Kwami of Compassion. His power is supposed to heal and nurture whoever he possesses, help them overcome their flaws. Instead, his power is being used to corrupt people into monsters!"

"Like some kind of… Grimmification." Ruby hesitated to say, "It would explain his power."

"Yes that's exactly right! We have to find whoever is causing this and beat them!"

"I don't know Tikki… he managed to beat me this time what if he does it again? How do we even depower him?

"Don't worry about you losing that time Ruby!" Tikki quickly reassured. "It was your first real fight, and now that you know more you can do better this time! As for how to depower him…"

She conjured up the yoyo. Tikki opened it up.

"Nooro's power is to posses someone and grant it powers. However, each of these victims have a special item that contains the butterfly possessing them. If you can break it, you can use the yoyo to capture the butterfly and undo their effects on the world."

"Yeah! I can get help from Chat Noir!"

"Chat Noir?" Tikka's eyes widened. "Shit, that means Plagg's out."

"Wait, who's Plagg? Is he a Kwami?" Ruby asked. "What's wrong with him?"

"Him I don't have a problem with. It's his wielders I'm concerned about." Tikki said. "Beware of those chosen by the Cat Miraculous, Ruby. Such people tend to a sketchy history. I wouldn't want to get you hurt by them."

Ruby shrugged. "I dunno Tikki, she seemed nice. She saved me out today and promised she'd help me find Chadwick."

"She did?" The Kwami raised it's stubby arm to her chin, scratching it. "Just be careful. She could be manipulating you for her freedom. Previous users would woo Ladybugs to receive a kiss, made from love… and then leave them at a moment's convenience. I don't want you going through that heartbreak."

Ruby blushed heavily. 'True love's kiss breaks the spell, huh… like a fairy tale.'

Ever since she was a kid, Ruby loved fairy tales. Tales of heroes, princesses and creatures that lurked in the woods, she loved how even though they go through horrible and painful things they would eventually have a happy ending. Maybe even get married! That seemed nice…

Nowadays, she still liked them. They were entertaining, questionable moments from heroes aside. But Blake had been right when she said the real world wasn't like a fairy tale. Ruby kept that in mind when Tikki continued talking.

"We should go find him immediately! When do we get started?"

"I… I have to be with my friends first." Ruby said. "Once dinner is over then I'll get search for Chadwick again. I promise."

If Tikki noticed anything up with Ruby, she did not say. She only nods, and vanished back into the earrings.

Satisfied, Ruby left the stall. She opened the door only for it to bump into someone.

"Blake? Oh I'm so sorry!"

Her new friend waved it off. "Don't worry about it, Ruby. Where are you headed?"

"I was… umm…" Ruby chuckled. "I was heading to the cafeteria!"

"Good. Me too."

"…"

"So um… wanna walk together?"

"…"

"Sure."

_______________________________________________________________________

Chadwick sat down on a rooftop, panting heavily.

He had made a reasonable amount of distance from the prison. Roman didn't do that much exercise before or during his stint as a crook so this was a bit more than he could take. He wished he had a cool limo getaway car.

Or a scooter. Scooters were nice.

The more Roman thought about, his entire situation was pretty weird. The moment that butterfly landed on his hand and he heard a voice in his mind Roman thought he had been going crazy, Getting the power to turn people into donkeys and fighting those pesky heroes did nothing to soothe his worries about being insane.

Maybe the voice in his head would stop being vague and finally explain herself. He hoped for that as a glowing violet butterfly symbol appeared over his face again.

“You failed to get the miraculous, Roman.”

"Give me a break, woman." He said. "I was just about to when those stinkin' cops were about shoot me."

“If you hadn't gloated for so long you might have been able to take both. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't take away your power and give it someone competent.”

That wasn't good. Roman had to think about this carefully. If he wanted to keep this power, he needed a plan of attack.

"Wait your disembodied majesty, I may have something that can get your special magic jewels!"

The voice hummed in thought.

“Go on.”

He got down on his knees and begged, "Now see here, Mayor Ironwood's gonna give a speech later today. It's gonna attract a whole lot of press… and a mountain of cockroaches I call people. So many people that I can turn into big grey jackasses and overwhelm those so called heroes and steal those earrings! I can make this work, trust me I won't do any screwing around that isn't in service of your goal!"

Chadwick hoped this would work. He wasn't prepared to go back to being Roman Torchwick, the puny criminal who got caught by a freaking toddler. With this power he can be more.

A feeling of sinister content flowed through him. The voice seemed to have made her choice.

“Very well. This is your second chance. If you fail, it is your own fault.”

Good. This was good. Chadwick gave no one but the air a cruel evil grin.

"Thank you mistress… say, what do I call you anyway? I'm pretty sure sure you're not just a voice in my head."

"Well Mr. Torchwick, I could be your magical godmother or your evil queen. So I guess I'll be your very own… Monarch."

_______________________________________________________________________

"Breaking news! The most unusual prison break!"

Lisa Lavender's voice and image was for all the students to see. The cafeteria watched with passing interest at the latest news to available.

"Reports found that all the prisoners had mysteriously disappeared, with donkeys found all over the place! Ladybug and a mysterious new Cat Girl were last seen fleeing the scene. No word had been given but suspicions are now placed upon Vale's latest vigilante…"

On one table, one Yang Xiao-Long sighed.

"Oh great don't tell me she's a fake. A real shame, If I can't trust an anonymous vigilante who can you trust?"

The same table sat not just her, but her… friends? Acquaintances? She hoped that these people were friends

"They can't be the ones responsible," Jaune said. "Okay maybe the Cat Girl might have done something but Ladybug could be going after the real bad guy!"

"At least she got a better costume," Ren said. "The other one didn't feel like her if I say so."

"I just know that I like Cat Lady's outfit!" Nora yelled while raising her fists up and down. "Quick Ren, do we have time to go shopping for cosplay?"

Yang rolled her eyes. She turned to find her precious sister and roomie walking towards them. Noting the seemingly forlorn look on their faces, Yang wondered if something had happened. If she should ask any questions.

"Yo Rubes! Blakey! Why not come with the cool kids at the table?"

Blake glared at Yang. "Call me that again and I'll end your life."

"What's going on Yang?" Ruby asked trying to prevent a problem. "How's the first day for you?"

"It's been going fine Ruby. Boring, but I met some cool people." Yang pointed at the TV. "We were just talking about Ladybug. People disappeared from prison and the news think it's her and some Cat Girl's fault."

Ruby frowned. 'They didn't say anything about Chadwick? That's so strange… or maybe that's how it is. The bad get away and the good get blamed…'

Blake had her own reaction. 'I expected the cops to cover up for their own incompetence. Police look out for each other, not the people. But… Cat Girl? Seriously? Would it have been that hard to get my name right? At least translate Chat Noir to Black Cat or something, I hate this.'

"Hey Pyrrha, you haven't said anything yet." Jaune said. "What do you think of this thing?"

Pyrrha seemed nervous about something. He wasn't sure what about, but Jaune didn't want her to be left out. She seemed pretty nice.

"Ah, well," Pyrrha said. "I'd rather wait until more information comes through. Sometimes we have to wait for the truth to come through right?"

"Yeah… that makes sense." Jaune nodded. "I hope her name is cleared. She saved my bacon and I'm not sure what I'd do if-"

"Ah, Pyrrha Nikos! Right in our midst!"

The group turned their heads towards the offending voice. The sight of Weiss Schnee with something that wasn't a frown or annoyance would normally be a pretty sight, but the gleam in her eye indicated that trouble was afoot.

The way Pyrrha was shaking from her words rang some bells in Jaune's head. She looked around to see if anyone heard.

"Um, could you please keep it down? I'm not-"

"This will be perfect!" Weiss interrupting. She clearly wasn't paying attention to her discomfort. "The great fashion model combined with the famous Vale athlete! Together we will be unstoppable!"

Everyone at the table looked at Pyrrha. Ren and Nora didn't really care all that much. A pal is a pal after all. Yang had an eyebrow raised. Ruby was rubbing her chin as gears were turning in her head trying to figure something out. Blake just stared impassively, not caring either way.

Weiss kept talking over them. Jaune had previously asked her out because she was pretty, but the way that Pyrrha tensed up at being recognized made him have second thoughts.

"I can see it now! We'll be popular! We'll be even bigger celebrities together! We'll get perfect grades! Nothing can come between us now!"

That about did it. Jaune had stood up now.

"You know what else is great?" Jaune said. "Me. Jaune Arc. Nice to see you again, Snow Angel."

Weiss was irritated at the buffoon from yesterday speaking to her. "You again? Haven't I told you enough that your incessant flirting will get you nowhere?"

"Yeah I figured. But you're not exactly being friendly yourself right now soooo…"

Weiss looked annoyed. Blake observed how Pyrrha seemed relieved when Jaune spoke up. She'll admit that this moment was about the most spine he'd shown but Blake thinks Pyrrha could do a little better than Jaune. He showed basic respect and nothing else.

Still, anything that annoyed Weiss was good in Blake's book.

"Jaune, is it?" Weiss said. "Do you have any idea who you've talking to?

Jaune shrugged. "Not in the slightest. Should I?"

"Miss Schnee, please." Pyrrha begged. "I don't want anyone to know!"

The ice queen ignored her words. "This is Pyrrha Nikos! Graduated top of her class at Sanctum, she's a super star football player who's athletics are known far and wide!"

Looks like the cat was out of the bag. Yang's eyes widened in surprise while Ren and Nora stared at Pyrrha with awe.

Pyrrha for her part was angry. It would have been foolish to think that her secret would be kept hidden for long, but she expected at least a week before it happened. Not immediately the day after arriving. She readied her fist to pummel the offending Weiss right now.

"Really?" Jaune tilted his head in confusion. "Never heard of her."

… What?

Pyrrha reeled a bit from the shock. He really didn't know her? Wonderful words to hear admittedly, but… really? Her fortune couldn't possibly be this good.

Any moment of shock Weiss had quickly disappeared. She scoffed at this clearly moronic ingrate too low for her.

"Oh please, you mean to tell me you're NEVER HEARD of the invincible girl who won the Mistral Football Tournaments four years in a row, establishing a new record!"

Jaune scratched the back of his head. "Can't say I've heard of them no."

Eye twitch. Weiss was feeling a very annoyed eye twitch happening right now.

"There's no way you could not know! She's on the front of every Pumpkin Pete's Marshmallow Flakes box!"

A loud gasped was heard. It came from Ruby, looking as if a lightbulb was shining over her head.

"Holy crap you were on my cereal boxes!" She pointed at Pyrrha. "I used to eat Pumpkin Pete's all the time back at Patch and I didn't expect you to be a real person! Holy crud this is SO awesome!"

"Yeah, I remember doing that for a charity event." Pyrrha chuckled, shaking her head. "Sadly the cereal isn't very good for you."

Yang laughed heartily. "That's what I keep telling Ruby, but her sweet tooth overrides her common sense."

"Hey!"

"Wow I can't believe you didn't say anything Pyrrha!" Nora said. "Must be so fun being a famous football player! Closest thing to football was when me and Ren threw badgers at the trees expecting them to break down and reveal HIDDEN TREASURE! They didn't though which is so disappointing."

"I kept telling you it wouldn't work." Ren said. "You find treasure inside of caves, not trees."

"See Ren, this is why you're my other half!"

Weiss rolled her eyes at this most unorthodox nonsense. She simply had to get Pyrrha out of there for her own good.

"So, after hearing all of this do you really think you're in a position to talk to Pyrrha at all? You're not quite on our level."

Jaune frowned. "If she wants to talk to us, then that's her deal, Snow Angel. Not yours."

"Don't be ridiculous." Weiss said. "Pyrrha come with me, you need to be with people of your stature!"

At that, Pyrrha stood up from the chair. She glared at the Schnee with fire in her bright green eyes.

"And I'm telling your right now, I don't want to be around you. I asked you multiple times to stop and you haven't done it. Now leave me alone. I won't say it one more time!"

Her stare made Weiss take a step back. Her attempt to save this pure maiden from the savage ingrates had clearly failed. Oh well, she would try again another time. She wouldn't be intimidated by anyone. Definitely not going to run with a tail behind her butt because she was scared.

It was definitely that.

"Fine," Weiss turned around, scoffing. "Throw your lot with useless peons! But I'll be there if you need a true equal."

The heiress stormed off in a huff. As she took steps away, everyone on the table smiled in relief.

"Wow you handled her so well Pyrrha!" Nora said. "Maybe we can break her Schnees Knees next!"

"I… really wouldn't want to do that." Pyrrha sat down again, blushing in embarrassment. "I get enough press already. I just want to be a normal girl right now, at least for a while. Normal knees and all."

"I know what that's all about." Ruby said. Then she frowned. "Ohhhh and I have her for a roomie! Crud my life sucks."

Unable to help themselves, everyone laughed. Yang placed an arm on her precious sister's shoulder and rubbed it reassuringly.

"Hey don't worry Rubes. It's one semester. Soon as it's done we'll work on transferring you out of there into another room. "

Ruby smiled. She was so lucky to have a big sister like Yang around. It always seemed like Yang knew what to say, what to do… how to do it… Ever since Ruby was a little girl Yang had been her hero, the light that shined in the dark. In every way that mattered Yang had the qualities of a hero. She could have been a champion if Ruby hadn't been picked.

Maybe she should be. Ruby still had time to rectify it. Maybe Yang can be the hero she could never be. maybe-

"Ow! Stop it! Stop it please!"

Everyone at the table turned from the table. burly looking guy. He had an ugly crew cut and muscles meant for wrestling. He had been grabbing someone by the hair. Aside from a few glares, no one was lifting a finger to help.

"Shit man," Yang said. "Wonder if a teacher's here."

She turned to her sister, but Ruby wasn't there. Yang followed the sound of footsteps and found she was heading for the trouble.

"Hey Ruby? Wait a sec!"

Ruby wasn't listening. The girl instead travelled to where the noise came from. As she got closer, Ruby could hear words being exchanged.

"Fuckin' bitch, not so tough without your girlfriend here huh?!"

The girl- Velvet Scarletina. Ruby remembered her from class- strained against his grip. "Leave me alone, Cardin! You bastard!"

Cardin Winchester grinned. "Yeah? Well who's gonna stop me?"

"Hey!"

He didn't even notice the tight grip on his arm before he felt the punch coming.

_______________________________________________________________________

Blake Belladonna waited outside the conference room.

After the incident at the lunchroom, Ruby and Cardin had been called away to receive discipline. Cardin had left a few minutes earlier, not all that worried. Ruby had been inside longer.

Worry had built up within her. Blake hoped Ruby wouldn't get in trouble.

That worry only increased when the door opened. Ruby stepped out of it, looking… unlike herself. Previously Blake had seen with sunshine and smiles pouring from her very being. Now, Ruby's normally flashy grey eyes seemed dimmed, as if dulled by resignation.

It was not something that made Blake happy.

"You okay?"

Ruby looked at her. Thankfully a small smile seemed to form on her lips.

"Maybe… Surprised to see you here Blake." Ruby said. "Where is everybody?"

Blake shrugged. "The headmaster been called to attend a rally later. Mayor Ironwood will be speaking. I decided to stay behind to get you."

"Oh…" Ruby looked away. "Good."

"… Ruby." Blake said. "What did they say to you?"

The girl didn't seem sure what to say. She then sighed.

"Cardin Winchester acted out of line. But you shouldn't have acted so violently. You have to think about his future prospects." Ruby mimicked. She sighed. "They said if something like this happened again I would be kicked out."

Then, Ruby frowned. "It's so stupid. Cardin was the one hurting people. He got a tiny reprimand, but I'm the one who's punished? I thought it would get better in University… but it doesn't. It's so unfair!"

"I'm not surprised." Blake agreed, nodding sadly. "The world can be pretty unfair."

Ruby nodded, not saying anything.

The pair were walking outside. Ruby had noticed that the students were being filed into a line.

"Why are they lined up? Is it for that rally you mentioned?"

"Yes," Blake answered. "Yang and the others are in a different group. We'll see them later."

"Ooohhhh… nice!" Ruby said. "So what's this Ironwood guy all about? I don't really read much news."

"… Ironwood is… controversial." Blake tried to find the right words. "He's considered popular for raising the economy in Vale but some of his policies have been questionable."

"What do you mean by…" Ruby bit her lip. "Questionable?"

"Well," Blake said. "He increased funding for the police department, allowing them access to military grade guns and weapons."

Ruby raised her eyebrows. "Doesn't that seem… excessive?"

"Some think it's needed."

"What do you think then?"

"… I think it's horrible." Blake said. "I haven't had the best experiences with cops, and the last thing we need is to give them more stuff to harass people with."

"Sounds about right." Ruby scratched her chin. "The sheriff back in Patch acted all high and mighty 'cause he had a gun. Freaked my classmates out whenever he walked near the school waving that thing around. If that's one sheriff imagine the whole department like that."

They walked a bit further as the line continued.

There was a thought that had been nagging at Blake. A relatively simple question she wanted to ask. Considering that they were going to be there for a while, it seemed about as right time as any to start.

"Ruby…" Blake said. "Why did you do that thing earlier?"

The girl turned her head around. "What do you mean?"

"Punching Cardin." Blake said. "You knew you were going to get in trouble, but you did it anyway. Why?"

Ruby frowned.

"… Blake? Remember what I told you last night? How I wanted to be like the heroes of those fairy tales?"

Upon hearing those words, Blake's face morphed into a subtle glare.

"Is that it? You wanted to play a hero?"

"No no, it's just-" Ruby shook her head, pinching her nose. "Listen. Cardin wasn't going to stop harassing Velvet, and no one was standing up for her. No one. If I didn't do something, who would? Evil triumphs when good men do nothing. When someone's in trouble, you have to stand up for what's right even if bad things happen to you. Because if you don't… if I don't… then we would be no better than Cardin. The world's damned if nobody did the right thing. Just like you helped me the other day with Weiss, I had to do something. The fairy tale heroes worked for their happy ending. I'll do the same, maybe for everyone else. You understand?"

"…"

"… Sorry."

"No it's fine."

The two said nothing. They continued their walk.

At this moment, Blake felt an odd mix of emotions. Ruby thought she was saving her that time with Weiss… the girl didn't know. That time, Blake hadn't helped Ruby out of any sense of kindness. All she wanted to humiliate the mighty Weiss Schnee, nothing more.

Blake couldn't even say Chat Noir was helpful. She only helped Ladybug out because Plagg told her she would solve all her problems. A simple kiss was all that was needed, and Blake would wait until they defeated Chadwick to ask her for that.

If there was one thing Blake knew, it was that she was not a good person. A good person would help out of the kindness of their heart, wouldn't help people because it was convenient. A good person wouldn't run away when they did something bad, or stand around and watch as someone was going to get hurt. If she was good, she wouldn't have that accursed Plagg on her fingertips.

Every day, Blake looked at herself in the mirror wondering when she will feel fine. Perhaps…

She looked at the ring in her finger.

Perhaps with this, she might finally feel like herself.

_______________________________________________________________________

The crowd had gathered at Town Hall.

They surrounded a tall platform that was surrounded by several armed guards. The wide metal fences kept the people back.

Amid the cheers and screams of the audience were students either too tired or too jaded to care about the conference either way. One of those was Yang Xiao Long, who, bored out of her skull, searched around for her friend and sister.

"Where's Blake and Ruby?" She said annoyed. "They're supposed to be here aren't they?"

"Hey relax," Jaune smiled. "The crowd's pretty thick after all."

Yang knew as much. Upon hearing claps from the audience, she turned her head to see a tall bearded man in a white suit walking towards the podium. He waved, a practiced smile on his face and a slight shake on his right arm.

He cleared his throat, before taking the microphone into his left hand.

"Thank you all for coming ladies and gentlemen!"

James Ironwood considered himself a lucky man. Having served in the military for years, he knew the value of sacrifice. How men on the frontline were considered expendable by the chain of command, how compromise was necessary in order to complete the mission.

"In just a few months, elections will be heading underway. I will be running a campaign for reelection."

James kept that same attitude in the political arena. He had to pull strings and make alliances in order to get stuff done. Things that have made people uncomfortable, even suspicious. It was worth it in Ironwood's mind.

"Thanks to me, crime rates have gone down by 20% and the city infrastructure has prospered in my time. If you can get me elected again, we can do so much more."

The city is infected by lowlives and scum. He will do whatever it takes to ensure order in his city. He will protect the people from themselves.

His words faded into the background of applause, as Yang heard an apology or two from behind her.

"Sorry we're late," Blake said. "Thick crowd."

"See, I told you!" Jaune pointed at Yang. "Don't be so worried."

Ruby looked up to the podium. "Has he said anything interesting?"

"Eh," Yang said. "Just drumming up publicity for his campaign. Nothing solid, like usual for politicians."

"… on my soul, I promise," Ironwood said. "I promise to do a better job this time around than I did before. I will focus on the real issues affecting this city, and drive them out from our town!"

That got a round of applause from the audience. Ironwood basked in the praise, doing a little bow here and there.

This was not the best part of the job, far from it. The best part of the job is getting behind the desk and going through the boring, practical paperwork that'll allow him to make the big decisions. James smiled. Things were going well.

"Excuse me, Mayor Ironwood! Just a question!"

Now the questions barrage. Sometimes he wished Winter were still there to sort this stuff out.

"Of course," James said confidently. "Just as expected from the press."

"What do you have to say about the Ladybug vigilante? And her Cat-themed assistant?"

Ironwood breathed with a heavy sigh. Of course this would come up. Might as well get it out of the way.

"I will make my position clear. Ladybug is a threat to peaceful society as we know it. If we allow her to run the streets unsupervised she will bring harm the innocent and destabilize order. Her existence will cause an escalation in crime. If she cared to save people, she would join the police. As soon as this meeting is done I will put together a task force to hunt her down."

Now that caused quite a stir. The people were going uproar at Ironwood's declarations, some baffled, some relieved but most of all confusion.

"Guess someone's not a fan." Yang crossed her arms. "Not sure if I'm liking the guy so far."

"He has to pay lip service to law and order." Blake said. "Potential backers wouldn't be too pleased with a politician who openly supports a vigilante."

"That guy's a load of crap!" Nora yelled. "Ladybug's not a bad guy and I'm sure she'd do a way better job of being a mayor than that jerk face over there! Ren do we have the eggs?"

"Nora no"

"Nora YES!"

Ruby herself was not sure how to respond. Ironwood raised a good point. What if she made things worse by stepping in? Roman turned into Chadwick because of her. Maybe-

"Glad to find someone who isn't a fan of that bug!"

Several bowler hats spread around the area. The guards protecting the rally had them stuck to their heads, and dropped their guns. One fired in fear. That caused the crowd to disperse!

"RUN FOR IT!" Someone said. "They're gonna- AH!"

Ruby looked around in horror. Everywhere people ran, there were a couple or so who were writhing in pain, turning into creatures they were never meant to be.

"Get away Ruby!" Yang yelled in her ear. "Run!"

"YANG!"

Ruby felt her sister push her away. She couldn't see Blake, her friends or anyone she recognized in the crowd. Even amid the crowd she was alone.

Her earrings glowed.

Perfect.

_______________________________________________________________________

The situation had turned insane.

It was as if Ladybug was not a lucky charm but a symbol of a doom according to the world of James Ironwood. All it took was saying her name and then the cavalcade of bullshit reigned on him today. To think James was looking forward to a nice meal after this event.

He hid behind the podium. He could that his guards were being turned into hideous beasts, and despair gripped his heart at the thought he could end up like them.

"What the hell is going?!" James tapped his ear piece. "What's causing these attacks!?"

"I don't know sir," The voice on the other line. "Everything is getting chaotic. You need to get out of there."

"Spoken like a true detective," Ironwood said. "This is clearly a terrorist attack. Coordinate the police to block the perimeter."

The static in his ear gave him no answer as to whether his instruction was heard. Just then, Ironwood heard a thud. He surmised that someone had landed on the platform.

"Excuse Mr. Mayor," The stranger leaning his head on the cane. "I hope you don't mind if I take the mike."

Ironwood glared at this gaudy looking villain. He took out the gun from his pocket, only for the criminal to knock it out of his hand with the staff.

"You're a parasite to our city," James said. "I will stop you."

The criminal laughed. "Nah. I don't think so. You just sit there while I wait for the bug."

The man who was Roman Torchwick smirked at the Mayor glaring at him. He never liked Old Ironwood anyway. This has been the second most amazing day of his life. Seeing everyone turn into the horrible monsters they are deep down, causing chaos everywhere… It was truly an honor to see.

He would have to thank the Monarch. Chadwick will get the miraculous, after prying it from Ladybug's dead hands.

"Chadwick!"

Speaking of whom…

"If it isn't the stupid brat I beat earlier," Chadwick turned his head towards the teenage heroine. "Ready to hand over your earrings?"

Ladybug clutched her fists. "You wish. What are you doing here, Chadwick? Why are you involving innocent people into this?"

"Ignoring your remark about innocents." Chadwick said. "I can say with certainty that you are in fact the one responsible for this."

She hesitated. Her eyes widened in fear.

"I… what?"

Good, Roman thought. Shiny knight types tend to be the most easy to manipulate. Just use their sense of shame to your advantage and you win the deck instantly.

"That's right Ladybug, YOU are the one at fault!" Chadwick said. "I was but a mere criminal that night until my new master sent a teeny butterfly and VOILA! Chadwick got his start! I have the power to turn everyone I want into stupid little mules, which I wouldn't have been able to do if you didn't step into the limelight."

The violet symbol of the butterfly appeared over his face.

"Hand over the miraculous my child," A whispery, angry voice could be heard in synch with Roman's own. "and you will save everyone."

She had taken a step back. Roman was close to getting to her. If he kept talking, he would get the Miraculous from her own hands.

"Come on…" He smirked. "Hand it over… and do nothing."

Suddenly Chadwick was struck by a staff to his skull.

He fell to the floor, blood spilling from his mouth. Chadwick looked up to see Ladybug's partner.

"You are a liar and a cheat. Ladybug won't listen to you."

Chat glanced at her partner. Ladybug was breathing in and out, trying to control herself. Chat had seen this sort of thing before. What was needed was encouragement. That was something she could do.

"If Ladybug had not interfered, you would have endangered the life of an innocent boy. You've had a life of crime beforehand. All Ladybug did was beat you before you could perpetrate more harm. She did the right thing then, and she does the right thing now. Whoever your master is, they are not ones to be trusted. If they would endanger the lives of civilians to get the miraculous then how can Ladybug trust them to stand down when she does? The only way for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing. Neither of us will stand aside to let you do as you please. Not now. "

Chat could feel the presence of her lady next to her. Ladybug stood tall, with yoyo in hand.

"Not ever." She said, staring down the criminal in front of her.

Chadwick wiped away from the blood from his mouth. Slowly he got up from the floor, facing the heroes in front of him.

"Stupid girls like you, always demanding things go their way. Fine. I'll just rip off the miraculous from your dead bodies!"

Yang won't lie. The situation was pretty weird.

One minute she and her friends were sitting at a boring political rally. Then everyone was turning into… Donkey dudes? She couldn't really tell what they were.

All she knew was, she had to punch. So she did.

Her hand hurts a bit, but these guys went down easily. That's a good sign.

"LAY OFF MY FRIENDS YOU BUTTS!"

Nora was off to the side whacking people around with her own punches. Now that Yang could take a good look, that girl was jacked! Not quite as much as her, but if Nora told a story about how she suplexed a bear Yang would believe it in a heart beat.

Ren wasn't doing too badly either. He wasn't hitting anyone, but no one was hitting him either. He was swift, moving like the wind to avoid getting swamped.

"Watch out Yang!"

Yang was caught off guard, getting hit from behind.

When she came to, a giant Donkey Man was standing over her. It was snarling, ready to attack anything was in it's way.

And she was right in front of it.

"… hey buddy?" Yang said nervously. "Sorry for hitting your friends?"

"HYAH!"

Something had hit it.

The giant Donkey Men fell to the side. Yang looked up, wondering who could have saved her then. Was it Pyrrha? Nora? Did Jaune do a second cool thing and save her?

Nope.

She certainly didn't expect to see a panicking, scared out of her own mind Weiss Schnee dropping a fire extinguisher.

"You people are idiots!" Weiss was practically screaming. "There are MONSTERS everywhere in this god forsaken street and you're just standing there and fighting?!"

"… Yeah." Yang said. "Seemed about right."

Weiss face palmed at that admission. "Whatever. Come with me, we can get out of here!"

"JAUNE!"

Yang and Weiss turned to the scream. Pyrrha was holding Jaune in her arms… or at least they presume it to be Jaune.

His hoof hands and transforming face are making it hard to be clear.

"Stay with me Jaune!" Pyrrha held Jaune tight. "Fight it! Don't let it control you!"

Yang didn't wait to ask the question. "What happened?"

Pyrrha frowned.

"I was trying to get away, but one of the hats almost landed on me." She said. "He sacrificed himself to save mine."

Jaune groaned in pain. Pyrrha gently rubbed his hair.

"Hey don't worry about it…" Yang tried to reassure her. She wasn't particularly fond of Jaune, but this was too much. "Ladybug will find a way to save him. I'm sure of it."

Yang hoped she did. She wasn't sure what's gonna happen if she couldn't.

_______________________________________________________________________

Roman remember when he thought this was the second best day of his life? He was mistaken.

Trying to dodge Ladybug and Chat Noir's attacks was a tricky feat. Unlike before, where they were exhausted by his Donkey Men, this time they were coordinated. They worked together.

If he tried to jump, Ladybug would use her yoyo to pull him back down. If he tried to run, Chat Noir's staff would bring him in. He would dodge one of the staff's swings, but Ladybug would punch him. He would swing his staff to try hitting them, but that just left him open for another attack.

'It is getting ridiculous!' Chadwick thought. 'Why don't they just give the fuck up and let me go?!'

"Ladybug!" Chat yelled. "The butterfly miraculous needs items to possess people. We need to find the item to break the butterfly out."

"Right." Ladybug nodded. "Working on it."

Ruby remembered Tikki explaining Nooro's power as well. She tried to guess at what item could have been possessed. Her first guess was the cane, but Roman was swinging it around without worrying about it. It was pretty sturdy too.

That left only one other place. How did he transform people into those monsters again…?

"Chat!" Ladybug yelled. "Aim for his hat!"

Chat raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

"I think his hat is the key! Break it or something and I can purify it!"

Roman was sweating bricks. He might actually lose…

"You're not stopping me! I have the power!"

He made a desperate charge at Ladybug, swinging his cane at her. However, Ladybug caught it between her hands.

"What the hell-?" Chadwick felt something come out of his head.

"Let's hope you're right, my Lady." Chat said. "Cataclysm."

The black bowler hat in her hand turned grey. Chat Noir gripped it even as the pieces turned to dust. Seconds later the wind carried the destroyed dust away from the palm of her hand. From the ashes, a glowing violet butterfly fluttered away.

"No no no" Chadwick was kicked away, tumbling to the floor. "Stop! Stop!"

Ruby knew what to do. She brought out her yoyo, and tossed it into the air. The yoyo opened up and captured the butterfly.

"Time to de-grimmify!"

"NOOOOOO!"

"Miraculous…CURE!"

The yoyo spun around. A storm of tiny insects burst from it, and covered… everything. Little ladybugs crawled everywhere, covering people, objects, anything in it's path. The average person would be horrified at the wave. It would have been a sign of a mini apocalypse.

However… it was the opposite of that.

The monsters that Chadwick brought into the world were undone. The donkeys returned to their original human shape, little by little.

"What… what happened?" Jaune groggily opened his eyes. "Did we… get em?"

"JAUNE!" Pyrrha held him close. Her eyes threatened to burst into tears. "You're alright!"

"Looks like Ladybug did it." Yang said. "Good on her."

The bugs where everywhere. More and more people were restored to normal. Any sign of damage had disappeared from their spread.

To make a bad pun… it was simply miraculous.

From the podium, Ladybug and Chat Noir were being watched by a curious audience. Some were frightened, unsure of what to say. Others…

They started clapping.

Ladybug and Chat Noir looked on at the audience applauding them. Both of them smiled. They beat the villain and saved everyone. What more would be needed?

"We did it…" Ladybug said, not quite believing those words. "We did it."

"Yeah." Chat placed a hand on Ladybug's shoulder. "We did."

Ladybug grabbed her hand. The two looked at each other again, closely.

"Was… there something you wanted to tell, Chat?" Ladybug had to ask. She needed to be sure about Chat's answer. "Anything at all?"

If she wanted to stop things here, if she wanted to be free from her curse… Ruby wouldn't have a problem. She did plenty, helping her today.

If Blake could hear those thoughts, she would violently banish them.

"No." Chat Noir said firmly. "We have yet to catch our mysterious butterfly villain. I will assist you until we manage to capture her, my lady. I won't let you down."

Hearing Chat say those words sent Ladybug's heart flutter. A blush appeared on her cheeks. She hadn't felt this way since…

Ironwood stood up from his hiding spot. He grabbed the microphone, and stared at the heroes in contempt.

"That criminal was after the likes of you two!" Ironwood yelled. "You two will be put under arrest!"

The crowd went insane. Yells and insults were thrown at the Mayor for his frankly godawful decision.

"What the HELL man?!"

"They saved our lives!"

"FUCK OFF!"

"LADYBUG! LADYBUG! LADYBUG!"

"I guess we should get going," Chat winked at her partner.

Ladybug nodded. "Yeah."

They jumped away from the scene. Ladybug swung in the air with her yoyo, while Chat crawled up the side of a building. The guards were disoriented from the earlier attack, so they didn't even try to fire on them.

Ironwood glared at the vigilantes.

"You won't get away with this, Ladybug. We'll hunt you down."

_______________________________________________________________________

"Oh thank goodness Ruby, thank you!"

Velvet had been crushing Ruby in a rather tight bear hug. She was shaking Ruby around wildly, which made the smaller girl dizzy.

"No problem Velvet," Ruby managed to say. "Stop crushing me."

"Sorry it's just," Velvet put Ruby down, smiling wildly. "Not a lot of people stand up for me, but you did! I'm super grateful for that!"

"Haha… it was nothing…"

"That was not nothing." Sunglasses girl came to the scene. "I'm Coco. Coco Adel. Thanks for helping my girlfriend out. Shame about Cardin not getting punished."

"Oh she was great!" Velvet hugged Coco. "I expected something like that to happen. I'm just glad she didn't sent away or something."

"Haha, that's true." Coco said. "Listen, Rubes? Me and Velvet need to do some work but thanks a lot. Hope to see more of ya in class."

The pair walked from Ruby.

Well that was nice. Ruby would say she did good today. She considered that a win. With that, Ruby turned around to head to her dorm.

Problem was, her dorm was all the way to the other side of the University. She'd have to cross the courtyard to do it.

It was also raining.

"I guess today wasn't so lucky," Ruby sighed. "Oh well. One bad thing in a day of good things I guess."

She was about to make a step, when she felt something over her head.

"Hey."

Ruby turned to see that Blake was standing next to her. She was holding an umbrella over her head.

"I was…. heading in the same direction." Blake said. "Maybe we could share?

Ruby blushed, but nodded.

The two headed out, the umbrella over their heads.

Ruby stole glances at Blake. She thought Blake looked so pretty then… it's like Chat Noir, the way she swore to help her and how she said she wouldn't let her down. Ruby knew that Blake wouldn't let her down either. Funny… both Blake and Chat Noir both caused her to blush so much today. She wasn't sure what that meant.

Blake thought about Ruby. All things considered, Ruby looked pretty cute right about now with the way she blushed. She also thought of Ladybug. Blake could have asked Ladybug for a kiss so she could go back to normal. Ladybug even seemed to give her an opportunity to do so. But then that would mean people would get hurt, and Ladybug would be alone. She won't let her down. Ladybug and Ruby inspired the good in her, it seemed.

As Blake protected Ruby from the rain, neither noticed two sets of eyes staring at them.

"I'm just gonna say it Ren," Nora said. "They're gonna be together together."

"It's incredibly obvious Nora."

18 notes · View notes

spadebrigade · 4 years

Text

eyes on you - sfw version

author’s note: hello! this is “eyes on you”, a version of my fic on ao3 that has the smut cut out. click here for the original, which also has the tags + summary

author’s note (continued): please note that this is a sequel to my longer work, a fortune i couldn’t foresee. but you don’t need to read it in order to understand this one shot!

we begin with this song. now onto the fic:

This was his moment. Kuroo closed his eyes, took a deep breath. It only took one phrase to spark a revolution, one song to set a nation’s heart on fire. And he was just the person to take on this challenge, delighting in the water droplets as they cascaded over his bare body. Taking in one more deep breath, he belted out:

“I love you, baaaaaby, and if it's quite alright

I need you, baaaaaby, to warm the lonely niiiiight~”

For the world to hear. Well--for Kenma to hear his terrible singing through the noises of the shower running in their shared apartment. He was just getting into the nonexistent music, singing excruciatingly slowly while he lathered his hair into a mohawk, before he stopped.

Why hadn’t Kenma banged on the door for him to shut the fuck up yet? Between the awful singing and the cheesy lyrics, he’d expected his boyfriend to have a complaint by now.

Rinsing off the remaining suds, Kuroo hummed the rest of the song to himself. He still couldn’t believe that he and Kenma were dating. All those years he’d been in love with his best friend, and it turns out it’d been mutual the whole time? He shook his head, muttering “what the fuck” to himself. But he couldn’t bring himself to be too mad about it, because they were together now. And as was his right as both boyfriend and best friend, he was going to annoy the fuck out of Kenma.

He slung a towel over his waist, not even bothering to dry off the drops of water that ran down his chest. He had far more important things to worry about, like bursting into Kenma’s room without knocking.

“What are you up to?”

Kenma sat in his desk chair with his back turned to the door. Kuroo didn’t need to admire him in secret anymore, but it was habit. Some part of his chest fluttered at the sight of his boyfriend so focused on his computer screen, ears covered by headphones and hair piled into a neat bun.

“I’m streaming,” Kenma said, occupied by some fantasy world on his monitor.

“What are you playing?” Kuroo stepped into his personal space, leaning forward and dripping water onto the keyboard.

“Oh my god.”

It was the utter disbelief in his voice that made Kuroo look up, to see wide honey-brown eyes. “What?”

“You’re half-naked and my camera is on.” He gestured to the stream of comments running across the screen. Kuroo caught a “WHO IS THAT” and plenty of tongue and water emojis.

“Oh.” He’d already forgotten he was in a towel. “Well--” He hadn’t signed up to perform for such a wide audience today, but he was going to deliver. “I gotta give the people what they want...Check out these guns.” He posed, flexing his biceps and making kissy faces at the camera.

“Get out,” Kenma pushed him out of the camera’s range. “You’re going to get me banned for pornography.”

He threw his head back into a hyena laugh, making his way towards the door. He was giddy, having achieved his goal of annoying Kenma for the day.

On his way out, he heard his boyfriend speaking into the mic: “The chat is being too much today. That’s just my roommate.”

Kuroo clicked the door closed. Right. Just his roommate.

When he sat at his desk later, trying to study, he knew that Kenma hadn’t meant it that way. They were boyfriends, and they were out as a couple to practically everyone they knew (Bokuto and Hinata had been particularly happy to find out, insisting on double dates that Kuroo agreed to and Kenma was horrified by). But Kenma was a Youtuber and hadn’t yet told his audience, for a number of reasons.

One was for their privacy. As Kenma had explained, “If my fanbase finds out I’m dating someone, they’ll have a lot of opinions about it. And that’s not something I want to deal with until I have to.”

And Kuroo understood that. But there was one reason that he wasn’t exactly comfortable with.

“Plus,” Kenma had said on that cold night when they were both sitting on their hard lump of a couch, “Yuuji and I have this whole thing going on right now. He’s been desperately single for a while and the fact that it looks like we might be dating is helping his views, and mine.”

Now, Kuroo chewed the end of his pen. He and Kenma hadn’t even been together that long, but he felt like he was already putting on a suit for the funeral of their honeymoon phase. When they had finally gotten together, the world didn’t stop for them--Kuroo had to pay attention to his exams, and Kenma had to pay attention to his Youtube career.

So much attention to his Youtube career. If he wasn’t recording a video, then he was editing another video, or streaming. At least Kuroo got to tag along when Kenma vlogged something, though he’d only be there to help with the camera.

But there was one thing he felt good about: they were going to have a Movie Night, a semiregular tradition that neither of them ever skipped. They’d take turns picking bad movies and Kenma would order some food, and Kuroo would cook something healthy in an attempt to balance it out. Last time, Kenma had chosen a film about a murderous car tire and this week, Kuroo planned to outdo him with a 2002 3D animated Christmas movie that was sure to be a heap of hilarious garbage.

Once he’d finally finished balancing the last of the chemical equations, Kuroo found himself in the kitchen, preparing cauliflower. It was a methodical process; washing, chopping, baking (even though their oven kind of sucked and raised the temperature of the entire apartment). He was in the middle of it when Kenma shuffled out of his room.

“Are you cooking?” He tilted his head, sniffing the air.

“Yeah, I found this dope recipe. It’s gonna be so awesome, you’re gonna have to like vegetables.”

“Right,” Kenma snorted. “Listen, I have to skip the movie tonight. I’m gonna hop on Yuuji’s stream and it’s gonna take a while.”

“Oh,” Kuroo said in a voice that he hoped covered the sound of his heart dropping to the bottom of his chest. “Okay.”

“Don’t you have homework to finish anyway?”

“Yeah.” He watched Kenma pluck an apple off the counter and disappear into his room.

Kuroo was left alone with the cauliflower. He lifted the bowl towards his face, staring at the zombie broccoli. “You still like me, right?”

It didn’t answer. He would have been worried if it did.

He continued cooking in silence. One missed movie night wasn’t a big deal, right? They could watch movies any time.

Or that’s what he told himself as laughter echoed from Kenma’s room.

≡

Kuroo thought that he could shake off these negative feelings, but they stuck to him like a wet paper towel.

He’d never been the jealous type in relationships. When his middle school girlfriend confessed that she liked another boy, he let her go with no hard feelings. With all his one night stands, he’d never felt possessive. If anything, he preferred to leave before he or his partner could marinate too much in their shame. But then again, when he’d been with all of those people, his heart had stayed behind in Kenma’s hands.

The word “jealous” left a rotten flavor in his mouth, but he couldn’t deny that was how he felt. When he went back into his room, pulling his laptop towards his face way too close like a preteen looking up boobs, he started researching this Yuuji that Kenma was spending so much time with. The Wikipedia page popped up on Google:

Full name: Yuuji Terushima

Occupation: Youtuber

Alias: PartyHair

Sliding in earbuds, Kuroo clicked around his channel. Immediately, his latest video began to autoplay.

“Welcome back, everyone! It’s your boy Yuuji…”

Kuroo frowned. This guy was fucking smokin’. A chiseled face, perfectly styled bleached hair, and was that a fucking tongue piercing?

He groaned. It was a secret wish of his to get blown by a guy with a tongue piercing. What if it was Kenma’s too?

A voice in his head told him he was being a total dumbass right now. And obviously, he didn’t think that Kenma would ever cheat on him--or actually leave him--based on who around him happened to be hot and have piercings. But Kuroo was still fucking mad about it.

After watching over an hour’s worth of PartyHair’s videos, Kuroo had brewed himself a fat pot of Old Man Grumpiness, complete with a dash of edge and a sprinkle of angst. One that he was still letting simmer when Kenma peeked into his room later.

“Good night.”

“Night,” Kuroo borderline growled, curling up under his blanket.

Kenma quirked an eyebrow in response. “I think you need to sleep.”

Sending incoherent mutters in response, he heard Kenma quietly click the door closed.

Kuroo would be damned if he waited his whole life to get this boy’s attention, only to lose it in a matter of weeks.

But he was still being a little bitch the next day, as Bokuto noted when they got lunch together.

“I’m not being a little bitch,” Kuroo crossed his arms, watching with annoyance as Bokuto scarfed down a burrito. “I’m just--I’m just pissed that he’s spending so much time with some other dude, y’know? We’ve only been dating a few weeks. Shouldn’t our hands always be in each other’s pants?”

Bokuto nearly choked, letting out a boisterous laugh. “Why the fuck would you assume that?”

“I don’t know!”

He shook his head. “Dude, if it really bothers you that much, why don’t you just talk to Kenma about it?”

“Because I don’t want him to think I’m some kind of possessive creep.” He leaned his cheek on his hand dejectedly.

“But you are some kind of pos-”

“Thanks, Bo, I get it.” He stared down at his untouched food.

“Look,” Bokuto gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze, “relationships are about communication, right? I always tell Akaashi what’s on my mind.”

“Yeah, I know.” Kuroo had heard plenty of times, from Akaashi himself, how it could be a little overwhelming to hear every passing thought about is it possible for two people on opposite ends of the universe to experience sunrise and sunset at the same time? And sometimes it was things like what do you think dirt actually tastes like?

“Me and Kenma don’t really work that way.”

Bokuto grinned knowingly. “Kuroo, which of us has been in a successful long-term relationship?”

He groaned, knowing exactly where this was going. “You.”

“And which of us was miserable until he listened to my genius advice to confess to Kenma?”

“Me…”

“Exactly,” Bokuto shot off some finger guns, before stealing some food off of his plate. “So maybe listen to the love expert this time around.”

He hated the fact that Bokuto was right, that he actually knew more about these things than Kuroo. But he didn’t need the reminder to know that Bo was an expert in loving people, was just natural at being adored and loved by everyone in the room. Kuroo, on the other hand, was not that kind of person. He was a little shit--and glad to be. But he didn’t want to only be a little shit to Kenma. He wanted to be a very nice shit, that smelled like roses. That you might want to cuddle with during a cold night. Okay, he was bad at metaphors.

♠

Kenma slid a hand over his face. “There’s more?”

He’d found himself having a peculiar problem ever since Kuroo had wandered into his room with a towel on. The entire internet was thirsting over his boyfriend.

The chat was spammed with comments, and within a few minutes, his Twitter was flooded with screenshots of Kuroo’s abs.

ana_the_beara: who the f**k is this hottie?! @ kodzuken

kr1kit: @ kodzuken says that’s just his roommate…

chanchan28: oh my god they were roommates

Kuroo had wandered into his room for all of one minute and now he had to deal with hundreds of thirst tweets, questions about his dating life, and speculations about Mr. Wet Abs’ identity. It was all a bit much for him to handle. (Though he did have to give credit to the people who made memes and edits during the stream, seemingly seconds after the whole thing even happened.)

He had a ton of damage control to do, especially considering how he and Yuuji were supposed to be dropping hints that they were together. He hoped that the other Youtuber wouldn’t be mad about it.

“That’s actually so funny,” Yuuji laughed on their phone call, scrolling through the memes. “But it could be a big help! It’ll, like, make more noise, y’know? Get people talking, which will get us more views.”

So that was one thing he didn’t have to worry about. But this whole “possibly-dating-other-online-people” business was starting to feel like more trouble than it was worth, as much as he liked hanging out with Yuuji.

How long did this have to go on for anyway? He’d much rather spend time with Kuroo. Speaking of Kuroo…

Maybe he could go for a movie tonight. So what if his homework was a day late?

♠

Kuroo was on the couch with his laptop, in the middle of solving equations that he should have done earlier, when Kenma walked into the living room.

“Hey, I have some free time. Want to watch a movie?” He settled in beside Kuroo, criss-crossing his legs.

He glanced at Kenma, before returning his gaze to his laptop. “I have work to do.” Shit, that’d sounded too sharp. Now Kenma was looking at him with furrowed brows. “It’s...homework.” He added awkwardly, as though that explained his terrible mood.

“Are you okay?” Came the inevitable question, gentle as it always was, laced with concern.

‘I’m fine,’ was what he’d wanted to say. That was not what came out.

“Oh so you want to hang out with me just because your schedule cleared up?”

He got a look of bewilderment in return, and looked away, his skin heating with embarrassment and anger.

A hand reached over and Kenma slowly closed his laptop, looking at him directly. He couldn’t bring his eyes to meet that catlike gaze.

“Are you saying that I don’t make time for you?”

There was the question. The confrontation.

“Well, you don’t.” As he said it, he felt like a petulant child, throwing a fit over nothing. But he couldn’t stop himself.

“Kuro, we’re both in a busy time right now. You know that.” His voice was measured despite the irritation that colored it.

He turned now, arms crossed and eyes glaring. “Why don’t you go hang out with Yuuji?” He spat the name.

Kenma blinked. Processed. “...You’re not seriously jealous of Yuuji?” Halfway between a question and a statement.

His shoulders scrunched as he sunk into the couch, silent.

♠

“Oh my god. Is that why you've been acting so weird lately?” He took Kuroo’s silence as an invitation to invade his space, gently pushing away the laptop and scooting even closer.

“You’ve been spending so much time with him! And half your followers think you’re fucking.”

“What does it matter if they think that when I’m fucking you?”

Kuroo huffed, turning his head away again.

“Kuroo, what does it matter when you’re the only person I masturbate to?”

He whipped his head back immediately, overcome by a blush that had already infected not only his cheeks, but also Kenma’s.

“I’m the only person you masturbate to?”

Now it was Kenma’s turn to look away. “I--I’ve been into you since forever. You already know that.”

He grinned. “But this is another level, kitty cat.”

Kenma groaned in frustration, his tied-back hair unable to cover the embarrassment on his face. “I’m out of here.”

“Kenma,” Kuroo said, in both shock and amusement at his boyfriend’s reaction. He didn’t have time to say anything else before Kenma was off the couch, out the room--

“Hey!” He scrambled to his feet, following after him. Kenma was fast, but not fast enough. Kuroo caught his hand in the hallway. He was anticipating a struggle, but didn’t receive one--Kenma’s face was turned away, but their hands were nonetheless linked together.

He led his embarrassed boyfriend into the room where this whole mess started, walking past the gaming setup and settling on Kenma’s bed. He sat among the pillows, but the bed’s owner settled in the farthest corner towards the wall, pressing his hands to his cheeks as though to absorb the redness.

“I masturbate to you, too.”

The confession relaxed Kenma’s shoulders, but his voice still came out quietly, “I always wondered--” He interrupted himself, shook his head. “Sometimes, I...I heard you doing it.”

Kuroo raised his eyebrows. “Me masturbating?” The answer to his question came in the form of sheepish nods. “...Did you like what you heard?”

“I--yeah, idiot!”

♠

A pillow landed on Kuroo’s face, earning his laughter. A devilish smile grew on his face. “Well, if you liked that song, I can give you a concert.” He was already shrugging out of his shirt. “You’ve got the best seat in the house.”

Maybe Terushima had a sexy piercing and some of Kenma’s time, but only Kuroo had the honor of gracing his boyfriend’s fantasies. And he was going to prove just how grateful he was.

“Did you see the news articles about your little display in my room?”

Kuroo snorted as he settled back, getting comfortable. “Did I make you jealous?”

“No,” he answered too quickly, crossing his arms. “Idiot.”

He let out his dorky hyena laugh, which, to Kenma, somehow sounded sexy. Before he could say anything else, Kuroo put on an enticing, yet filthy show for him to watch, which he may have participated in. Which may have involved a fantasy of a steamy shower in a lake house that they’d visited as kids.

When the show was over, they both settled back against the pillows breathlessly.

“Kuroo,” He began with a quirked brow, “if you were thinking of shower sex, then why set it in the cabin?”

He felt Kuroo’s chest shake as he laughed. “You’re finding plot holes in my masturbation fantasies?”

“Well, yeah.”

“It’s because...it’s scenic.”

Kenma scoffed at the obvious lie. “Come on, you’re clearly in a sharing mood today.”

“All right,” Kuroo sighed, looking up at the ceiling. “It’s because that summer...when we first visited that cabin...it’s when I first realized I love you.”

His heart skipped a beat. “It was?” Suddenly he racked his brain, trying to remember anything special that happened, any sign that Kuroo’s feelings towards him had changed. But there was nothing. They’d acted like dumb kids during that week away, just like they had every week before that.

“Yeah.” Kuroo smiled. Not that devilish grin of his, but one that was more honest, that spread over his face easily. “It was actually because of your mom.”

“What? Stop joking--”

“It’s not a joke!” He laughed, meeting Kenma’s eyes. “It really was because of her. I wanted to go to the deeper part of the lake without any adult supervision, and she wasn’t having it. It went something like…”

“I want to go in the lake.” Insisted young Kuroo, pointing to the opposite shore. “Me and Kenma wanna see the fish.”

“No, Tetsurou.” Mrs. Kozume tutted. “What if something happens while you’re over there and we can’t help you?”

“But I can swim! I won’t drown.”

She put her hands on her hips. “What if Kenma drowns? Will you be happy if I die from a heart attack?”

“But I didn’t even hear what she was saying,” he chuckled. “Me drowning was one thing, but putting you in danger...that was something I could never risk.”

Kenma had no idea how Kuroo could do it--could make him fall in love more and more.

“I thought about it a lot. But I decided that if someone else drowned--this is gonna sound horrible,” He shook his head, smiling. “If someone else drowned, I wouldn’t be nearly as upset. Except maybe my dad, but. The point is, I cared about you more than anyone else. Your mom must have been happy because I dropped the idea of going that deep into the lake.”

“Can we stop talking about my mom?”

Kuroo broke into another laugh. “Fine, fine. There were a few times at the lake that I thought about kissing you, but I chickened out each time...I really wish you’d been my first kiss.”

Kenma felt his chest expand. He knew how much Kuroo regretted fooling around with other people before they’d started dating. “...You don’t remember, do you?”

He received a curious head tilt in response. “Remember what?”

♠

“My eleventh birthday.”

“Wha--” Kuroo broke off his own question in confusion. “I remember your eleventh birthday. It was a few months after we visited the lake. Didn’t we have a sleepover?”

Kenma nodded. “We did. But that’s not what I mean.”

“Enlighten me.”

“All right. But give me the blanket first. I’m cold.”

“Even while resting in my loving arms?” Kuroo sighed dramatically, before pulling the blanket up over them. “There. Now tell me.”

“Okay,” Kenma tucked a strand of hair behind his ear, looking at a spot on the wall. “My mom bought me that cake. Do you remember? The one with the hedgehog on it.”

“Right. Because you liked Sonic, but you wanted him to look like a real hedgehog.”

“Yeah,” He nodded. “And she only told us to eat one piece so we wouldn’t get hyper. But then she went to sleep and we ate mochi instead?”

“Because it’d take longer for her to notice it was gone.” Kuroo grinned.

“You got this bit of chocolate on your nose. And you were laughing about something--I don’t know what it was, but it felt like a light inside of me switched on.”

“Your gay awakening?”

He snorted. “Basically. But that wasn’t what I wanted to tell you.”

“What, Kenma?” Kuroo whined. “You’re leaving me in suspense here.”

Kenma ignored him. “Do you also remember how you said you wanted to stay up all night long? And then you fell asleep at 11:30.”

“Well we were playing volleyball all day!”

He chuckled. “Well...before you fell asleep, we were talking. You asked me if there were any girls I liked.”

Kuroo’s eyebrows rose upwards. “And what did you say?”

“Anyway, Kuroo...have you ever kissed anyone?” Newly-eleven-year-old Kenma asked as Kuroo yawned.

“Me? No.” He shook his head sleepily.

Kenma turned over to his side, looking at Kuroo intently. Kuroo, with his messy hair covering half his face and his arms tucked behind his head, stared comfortably at the ceiling.

“Is there anyone you want to kiss?” Kenma asked, his heart beating faster.

“Mm, I dunno.” Kuroo turned over to face him. “I’d need practice.”

“We could practice.” He said before he could think better of the words, his pulse in his ears. He started to think of something to say, to cover it up--

“Mhm.”

Kenma’s breath stopped in his lungs. He scrunched up his face, gathered up the courage, and planted a peck right on Kuroo’s mouth. The world tilted, forever changed.

“...Kuroo?”

The only reply he got was a loud snore.

“No way.” Kuroo burst into laughter, much to Kenma’s annoyance. “I was asleep?!”

“You were, you ass.” Kenma rolled his eyes. “It was so embarrassing.”

“I guess that’s why you never mentioned it, huh.” Kuroo said, pulling Kenma’s hair free from its ponytail to run his fingers through it. He supposed that he was forgiven for the actions of his twelve-year-old self when Kenma hummed contentedly and leaned into his touch. “Actually,” he said with a small smile, “I’m kinda happy that happened. Because it means we were each other’s first kiss.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“And you’re gonna be my last kiss, too.”

“...Kuroo?” Kenma gave him that cute, furrowed-brow look.

“When we’re all old and wrinkly, you’ll still be the only person I wanna kiss.”

Kenma scoffed, turning over. “What a dork.” But there was no hiding the pink that had bloomed on his cheeks.

≡

“So,” Kenma said to his camera, leaning back in his gaming chair. “Next question: what is Kodzuken’s sexuality? Ah, I might need some help with this one.” He picked up his phone, dialing a number before putting it to his ear. “Can you come in here? I need you for a minute.”

A moment later, his door opened. “You called, kitty cat?”

“I told you to stop calling me that.” Kenma scoffed. “Anyway, come here. I need to tell my viewers what my sexuality is.” He gestured to the camera.

Kuroo squatted beside his chair, rubbing his chin in thought. “Ah, Kodzuken’s sexuality...well, it doesn’t matter, does it? Because he's mine.”

He suppressed a chuckle, but a smile still leaked from his lips. “Thanks for clearing that up.”

“No problem.” He stood, pressing a kiss to Kenma’s cheek. “Don’t be too long, okay? I’m making dinner.”

“Okay.”

Upon hearing the door click closed, he turned back to the camera. “Well, this answers the next question: who is Mr. Wet Abs?” Kenma waved his hands, knowing he’d later edit in pictures of them together. “He’s not just my roommate. He’s my boyfriend.”

And whatever he’d have to deal with--however many questions, comments, or gaudy headlines--it was worth it.

Ending notes: a million thanks to both my good friend ana and the lovely lauren for beta-ing this fic for me <3 and thank YOU for reading! please feel free to let me know what you think :D

my ao3

my instagram: @ spade.yy

#Fic #kuroken #afifc #kuroken fic rec #eyes on you

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migleefulmoments · 4 years

Note

"No one will ever convince me he made that statement, and if you listen to his ACTUAL words about that, he didn’t say he wouldn’t take any more LGBTQ roles." Darren literally said that the gay community would have his head if he took another gay role but somehow to tinhats like Cassie, that means the next role he takes will be a gay character. I guess Darren meant that he knows the gay community will try to murder him, but he has faith in his ability to avoid their attempts. They're such freaks.

When they make grandiose and sweeping statements like this, I feel the full weight of the disinformation campaign they all embrace. Cassie claims “When you listen to his actual words…he didn’t say he wouldn’t take any more LGBTQ roles” so we have to see if she’s telling the truth or she’s manipulating reality in order to soothe their anxiety and allow them to easily fetishize the gay version of Darren.

What did Darren say? (You can read the entire Bustle piece (X))

“There are certain [queer] roles that I’ll see that are just wonderful,“ Criss explains when we speak at a recent event for Clorox’s What Comes Next in New York, a few days after he returned from an overseas tour with his Glee co-star Lea Michele. ”But I want to make sure I won’t be another straight boy taking a gay man’s role.“Although Criss says it’s “been a real joy” playing queer characters like Blaine, Cunanan, and Hedwig in the Broadway musical Hedwig and the Angry Inch, he now doesn’t feel comfortable taking those roles, which is “unfortunate,” he says. “The reason I say that is because getting to play those characters is inherently a wonderful dramatic experience,” he adds. “It has made for very, very compelling and interesting people.”

One of the reasons they claim they don’t think Darren said the words is because they claim that print interviews are fake:

12/18/18 ajw720 answered:

I would like to see a video as well, nonnie, as I don’t actually think he said any of this shit. Print articles are never, ever to be trusted. They are generally fabricated.

If you recall nonnie, D himself called out an article earlier this year (it may even be the one referred to in this piece of crap) for taking a quote of his out of context about his Filipino Heritage, likely as he was sick of being called white repeatedly. Fact is, while he is able to correct the “white” narrative, he, at this time, is not able to correct the straight narrative so he can’t even defend himself when this utter nonsense is published in his name.

First of all print articles aren’t generally fabricated and most CAN be trusted if you vet them properly. Claiming “ALL print articles are fabricated”- and therefore not to be trusted is a perfect cctrope because it gives them the out they need to label everything they don’t like-every single quote, every single story, and every single description as fake news. It’s the perfect strategy for ignoring everything Darren talks about that proves he isn’t Blarren- all the puns and sexual innuendos, all the crude comments, all the sweet things he says about Mia or his sexuality. All they have to do is remind their followers that it was in a print article and Woosh- it’s invalid. Trump is doing the same thing with his base-he’s grooming them to believe that the media is dangerous and that everyone fabricates stories about him. He calls them “the enemy of the people” so when the. NYT proves he laundered money for years through the Russian mafia or that he actively cheated during the 2016 election and is trying to cheat in 2020, his base will scream “fake news” and threaten to go all 2nd amendment on the rest of us.

Once again Abby uses something to prove her point but misses the fact that it actually proves she’s full of shit- Darren did push back on the interview where he was misquoted regarding his Filipino heritage but he hasn’t pushed back on any other interview he’s ever given. We can see he’s capable of pushing back, he’s interested in making sure he is quoted accurately and yet we’ve seen no other example- the reasonable conclusion is that is because the other interviews weren’t misquoted.

e Bustle piece and understand that he said he will no longer play LGBTQ characters. It’s clear that Darren has a far deeper understanding of the issue than Cassie and Abby. Splitting hairs and claiming he didn’t specifically say he would never play a bisexual or trans character is stupid. What Cassie and Abby are missing in the article is this paragraph:

This conversation about straight actors being cast in gay roles is about more than just LGBTQ actors losing out on Oscars, of course. It’s about Hollywood missing an opportunity to embrace new talent who would better serve these stories. And over the years, actors like Criss have become more sensitive to these types of concerns. The Versase star understands that there is an added honesty to actor getting to play characters who share their identities. “The commitment to that drama is told in such a way that it can really effectively reach people’s lives,” Criss says. “I think that really is important.”

Abby gets her wish- there is an audio recording of him making this statement-albeit it was 4 months prior to the Bustle interview and he seems to have evolved his understanding of the importance of representation in those 4 months. In the Hollywood Reporter interview he said:

“….But I do think about that now, you know, if roles come by that are LGBT leaning - I really think it would be insensitive to the gay community if I were to take another role. I think they’d have my head. You know, I would totally understand that. So I’m certainly cognizant of it. And while it is very tricky, I think the discussion and the questioning is really really important. And I think it’s good that we’re uncertain and I hope that we can find some kind of balance.” -Darren Criss, 8/26/18

I am an idiot and can’t remember how I got the audio portion of the interview on to my blog so I have to refer you to my old post if you want to hear Darren say the words (X).

I think you are correct- Darren is well aware the gay community will kill him but he doesn’t care because he has superpowers.

EDIT** I found this charming comment from Chrisdare who is a “journalist” yet she knows nothing about journalism. I got in an argument with her once and she schooled me that journalists aren’t educated.and will say anything a publicist tells them too. Whatever, Valentina, Google should be your friend.

Anonymous asked: It wouldn’t matter if you saw a video because you wouldn’t believe it anyway. You would say he was being forced to say it. Fact is CCers haven’t believed a thing

ajw720 answered:I believe many things nonnie. I also have a deep and fundamental understanding about hollywood works nonnie and that is something you clearly lack.

Further, if D was straight, i believe he would never allow them to portray him as an asshole. D is an incredibly intelligent human being, he knows exactly how negatively the straight push reflects on him. and frankly, it would not be necessary if he exclusively slept with female persons with vaginas.

Have a nice life living in delusionville.

chrisdarebashfulsmiles JCS shut the f** up.

When we talk about articles and how they are made we talk about facts. I hate when you come here busting balls on professional stuff when you don’t know anything. You can’t even imagine all the shit we do as journalist

It’s not a matter of cc but the fact they are ruining D’s life and career. And if you are a fan you need to start opening your eyes and stop being an enabler. I swear you should feel guilty when he will come out because you helped keeping him in the closet.

Talk about dellusionville!

**********Edit Edit *******(X)

chrisdarebashfulsmiles Because there’s a power of attorney that allows RR and Ab to do so. To say something D has to prove that the article is harmful and he has to do it through a legal action. And this means breach of contract with all it entails like the two years of stop from signing an anything.

That IS NOT how “power of attorney” works. But nice try- 10 points for originality and imagination!

***Edit Edit Edit *********

Anonymous asked: An article you should read to help you understand how journalism works .tinyurl/com/y9s49tms. German Reporter At Der Spiegel Fired for Fabricating Stories “On A Grand Scale”. “I’m so angry, horrified, shocked, stunned,” Der Spiegel deputy foreign editor Mathieu von Rohr tweeted Wednesday. “Claas Relotius faked, he cheated on us all.” Journalists can’t just make up stories or publish falsities no matter how much you want to believe that is happening in Hollywood.

chrisdarebashfulsmiles answered: It’s amazing how is crystal clear that you never worked in a magazine or in a PR firm. I work since 2004 and I don’t need an article… I know how it works. We aren’t talking about WSJ and serious stuff. We are talking about gossip and showbusiness so don’t try to be smug because you are failing.

Have nice day/ night wherever you are. :) it’s evening here and I’m enjoying my free time.

bjpb8 Oh, my gosh who is this person. People thrive on gossip and “Rags”. IT SELLS. First begain with papers like En/quire, The Globe, etc. Then spread to SM with blinds. You think other magazines and papers do not want to make money. Everyone prints what sells depending on audiences. Embellishment is part of the trade. They want to catch your interest, which feeds right into what PR wants to sell! Tts a sybiotic relationship at best! It is just some are more talented at making what sounds like truth out of lies. Its called entertainment. You might want ro “read” about it.

The author of the Bustle interview has a master’s degree in journalism from CUNY New York so it is more like the wall street journal than it is the “website” you work for Valentina. Journalists have a degree in journalism. Anyone can be a blogger - you’ve proved that.

****Edit Edit Edit Edit *******

D/arren did not write that post! (X)

12/19/18

ajw720 I have enough faith in Dar/ren Cri/ss personality and his respect and love for his fans to know that the comments attributed to him were not his. I’ve seem this happen before…I’m sure many of you have, also. Darr/en is stuck between a rock and a hard place right now. When he finally writes a memoir about this time, he will let us know about his anquish, anger and remorse. If one is a TRUE CC and Dar/ren fan, after years of roller-coaster rides via PR, et al…I will continue to take the advice of the person that runse THIS SITE. “Trust the process…”

***********************************************************************

@geminess We have to trust the process and believe that C and D are working hard towards an ending to this absolute tragedy that is legally clean and does not jeopardize either of their careers.

I believe in them, I cannot accept that D would ever willingly choose to represent himself in this manner and to continue this nightmare of a charade surrounded by utterly and completely vile, disgusting human beings.

Please, please, please may we be right. I cannot repeat enough there is no alternative ending that is acceptable but D breaking free by ending this sham of an encage, severing ties with his inhumane team, and eventually coming out.

And yesterday proved once again just how frightening the alternative is. I would fear for his career and his life. And it baffles and amazes me that anyone watching, even if you believe he is the straightest man alive, cannot see how harmful that article was. It was like he used the LGBT+ community to win his awards and is now ready to dismiss them.

(X) 12/19/18

Anonymous asked: On the bright side, this means we’re coming to the end right?

ajw720 answered: Anon, we honestly don’t know, but we can only hope. If D extends his time with these assholes, it will be very ugly for him personally and professionally.

But logic seems to say that this article, the literally offends every fan but the blind and naive, is wholly unnecessary if in fact they are going to continue a professional relationships. And it did not just the fans, think about how many award voters they offended yesterday with that utter piece of crap.

Absolutely and utterly unreal. Hard to believe they are able to get away with working against their client at every turn.

Logic? One thing the cc fandom has proven in the last 10 years is that they do not understand or care about logic.

12/24/18 (X)

ajw720 It’s interesting how there are such varying opinions on the “straight boy” article. And I think it comes down to 2 questions:

1. Do you believe D is a willing participant in his closeting?

2. Do you believe he actually said what the article alleges?

My answer to both is a resounding no (though he will be forced to validate the comments) and I have good reason to think this. But I certainly see why ones perspective is different if you answer one or both as yes.

This being said, no matter your answers to the above, I don’t see how it can be justified that he would dismiss b/laine in such a manner. And the timing, because I still think it makes him look like an ass and /or a coward as awards are voted for playing queer. And to repeat, I don’t think he should play queer again until his team is dismissed, so I’m not disagreeing with the premise, just the manner it was done, which again, I believe was without his consent.

Not posting to start a fight. Everyone is entitled to an opinion. I clearly am not afraid to state mine, which is very reasoned and based on a lot of information I’ve collected.

Just interesting that some very intelligent people, all of whom believe he’s closeted, can vary so much in what they believe.

#crisscolfer #Darren criss #Bustle #gay representation

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ofbuffoon-blog · 5 years

Text

hhhhhhhhowdy ! my name is amanda ( 18 , she/they & est ) and I just recently finished watching the society and it .............. fucked me up???? grizz ?? has my whole heart ?? but yeah !! I’ll keep this short : I live to play the sims, I have 2 cats + 4 rats and I love to take naps. oh !! and I’m super excited to be a part of this rp and to meet all of you and your characters !!

there’s info on my lil evie spencers under the cut as well as some wanted connections at the end. it is quite lengthy + I apologize but her past section especially got kind of long so I made a SHORTER VERSION if you don’t want to read all of it :~) I also have a BIO + STATS page up if you want to check those out .

( HALSTON SAGE / TWENTY-TWO / SHE & HER ) ─ EVIE SPENCERS was seen at the church after the bus dropped us off, right? SHE is known by others as THE BUFFOON because of her HUMOROUS & KINDHEARTED ways, but people also say she’s LOUD & SARCASTIC. maybe that’ll change once she figures out what’s going on with the town she called home. EVIE only went on the trip because SHE WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM HER MOTHER, so god knows how she feels now. BELLY LAUGHTER, MAKING SILLY FACES TO CHEER SOMEONE UP & HOT CHOCOLATE WITH BIG MARSHMALLOWS can’t help them now… so for the time being, welcome to the unnamed.

PAST

born & raised in oldvale + the younger of 2

evie and her family were always tight ; father was as nurse & mother was an animator for an up and coming series on youtube and they were heads over heels in love with each other

her mother was always quite a strict parent. she tended to call herself the “bad guy” when she would say no to things & her father would say yes. her father, on the other hand, was more laid back. never took anything too seriously and had the ability to make someone smile with a single look ----- needless to say : evie took after her father. her mother even called her her father’s “mini me”

evie was a good girl. got good grades and never disobeyed her parents. she always apologized after having an argument with her sister and simply “ agreed to disagree ” instead of continuing

everything changed when, at age 15, evie got a phone call from a police officer in the middle of recess. she and her sister got to the hospital as soon as they could to meet the officer. to their shock and heartbreak, there was a car accident that involved their parents and a drunk driver that hit them head on. they were in the emergency room for what seemed like an eternity. finally, the doctor came out and told her that her mother was going to be fine but --- her father was in critical condition. and that she and her sister should go in and say their good-byes. and so they did

everything seemed different after her dad’s passing. the air in their house was ... heavier. evie’s sister went through multiple depressive episodes and her mother started to drink more & evie heard her crying during the night ; honestly, she wasn’t sure if her mother was getting any sleep at all. you even once heard her speaking to a higher being. she said : “why him? why not me?” which absolutely broke evie’s heart

her mother was never the same after her love died. it was like a piece of her went with him. she was constantly on her daughter’s backs ; yelling and getting angry when things wouldn’t get done her way. she even went as far as to slapping evie’s older sister across the face when she tried standing up for them. it got to a point where evie was afraid of her mother

despite everything, evie stayed the same. she was still humorous and tried to keep the mood light. she did this as a way of honoring her father, in a way. to keep his silliness alive. sometimes it got on peoples nerves but she didn’t care. not one bit

in school, evie was pretty popular. not in a “ queen b ” sort of way but more like .... she was friends with everyone and never really fit in with just one clique. she loved this & loved being able to have a solid circle of friends

criminology was something that always interested evie & she spent countless hours watching true crime + missing persons cases. it was actually what evie ended up going to university to study

^^ but evie’s mother had a very set image of what she wanted to see her daughters do. she would always try to control every aspect of their life ; the clothes they wore, how they spoke, the activities they took part in. she even went as far as to picking jobs for them to choose from which was 1) doctor or nurse, 2) dentist or orthodontist or 3) a teacher which neither sibling wanted to do and when they told their mother, she was legit distraught. so much so that she threatened to kick them out. and so, evie allowed her mother to control her life. it wouldn’t be forever, after all

evie actually snuck behind her back and applied for a criminology major in university & she never told her mother about it. the whole time, her mother thought she was going to school to become a teacher

the last thing she told her mother was: “stay safe while we’re gone.”

PRESENT

not a day goes past that evie doesn’t think about her parents

she constantly makes jokes to keep everyone from being too afraid or panicking

evie also is trying to set up a “ game day ” to relief some stress ; some people don’t think it’s a good idea but she does

she ........... is very upset about being away from her mother. yes - part of her loathed her mother for trying to take control of her life but the woman was still her mother ; someone who lost the love of their life and evie couldn’t blame her mother for the way she changed. she wishes so badly to just hold her mother and apologize and thank her for everything she’d done

every night, evie has these “ talks ” with her father. she’ll just lay in bed and pretend she’s talking to her father ; talk about her day, how things are going. she even sometimes asks him if he knows where they are & how they all got there in hopes of hearing some kind of answer. but she never does

OTHER INFO

PINTEREST BOARD

evie was actually named after the pokemon : eevee .... because her father was a DIE HARD fan of the game but they had to make the spelling acceptable so "evie” it was

bisexual | enfp | ravenclaw | true neutral

pos traits : humorous, kindhearted & welcoming neg traits : loud, sarcastic & clumsy

WANTED CONNECTIONS

best friends :: someone evie can trust ; someone who she can’t imagine her life without

enemies :: someone who gets on evie’s nerves ; someone who has a mutual disliking

crushes :: someone who gives evie butterflies ; someone who she wants to kiss

past hook ups :: someone evie has slept with ; someone she probably tries to avoid

fwb :: someone evie sleeps with occasionally

literally anYTHING AT ALL

annnnnnnd yeah ??? sorry this got so long omfg fdjkgsd ; hit me up if you feel like plotting with my babycakes , mwah

#unnamed:intro #:^^^)

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stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale · 6 years

Text

confessions and constellations [2/3]

Summary: AJ finds a crumpled up piece of paper with a poem on it. Not understanding what it means, he shows it to Clem. It seems that the two of them have a mystery on their hands. They know who wrote it, but… who is the poem about?

Preview:

Again and again, he tries to write, tries to push those negative thoughts away. Hell, he even takes a break from the poetry format and just jots down his feelings.

When it's just the two of us, you make me feel like I have a purpose here. Suddenly, survival isn't just the one and only goal day to day. Making you smile feels just as important as living does. I want to stay up late with you and talk and laugh and hold hands and look at the stars and make up stories about each of them. Give them all names and stupid voices until the sun comes up and they fade away.

I know I’ll never tell you any of this. I’ll never tell you how much you’ve grown to mean to me over all these years. You’ve always been there in the corner of my eyes and now you’re all I dream about.

I want

Aasim sighs.

I want you.

How pathetic.

Warnings: Aasim gets hurt in more ways than one. AJ’s an awful detective but he’s trying his best. Mitch pukes.

Author’s Note: This one’s pretty long. Thanks to everyone who read the first part! I really appreciate it! Maybe we’ll find out who the poem’s about. spoiler alert: we don’t not until the final part

Part I | Part II | Part III

---

The bright warmth shining in through his window is deceptive. When Aasim tugs the heavy blanket off himself and kicks it to the floor, the cool air immediately clings to any free skin. He feels goosebumps rise along his neck.

He had another dream last night.

In his mind, the images replay over and over again. He memorizes as much as he can. He flips over onto his side and yanks open his desk drawer to pull out one of his many notebooks. This one is red with a torn cover and some water damage on the bottom half. Drowsily, he flips to the next blank page and pulls the cap of his pen off with his teeth.

He jots down the little details before they flee his memory forever. They’re scattered, barely sentences.

the moon was enormous / not white? it was gold like the sun but cold gold/cold

fireflies instead of stars

in a city? we were on top of this huge building lots of windows

we kissed again

He fills up the page before tossing it onto his desk. He lays back to stare up at the ceiling.

It’s another day of survival. He’s to go check the traps and hunt after breakfast. Then, it’s back to work on his poetry...

Fuck.

Aasim groans, flinging his arm over his eyes.

He really thought he had something last night, he really did. But, after reading back what he wrote it just seemed so... bad? He could never read something like that out loud and expect to be taken seriously. No way in hell.

And, after he crumpled the paper up, it occurred to him once again that the whole poetry thing might be a huge waste of time and energy.

Being in love is a huge waste of time and energy.

It’s not something that’s going to help him survive day to day, it’s not going to feed him at night, and it’s not going to guarantee a roof over his head. Being in love, or rather, having this stupid, intense, mind-numbing crush wasn’t doing anything good for him. If anything, it’s just eating away at him, exhausting both his mind and his body, wasting his time.

And for what?

For some fantasy of love? Of being loved? Of not waking up alone and having someone there to kiss him and hold him and just... be there?

That’s all it is: a fantasy. A dream. Just like the ones he has almost every night.

He could continue with his plan, sure. Write the poem, write the note, confess with the poem, huge romantic moon, and...

... and have one of two outcomes:

Rejection. Eternal heartbreak. Death.

Acceptance. Temporary happiness... Death.

Because that’s all it ever ends with, right?

Aasim rises from the bed and moves about his room, continuing with his morning routine to distract himself with his thoughts.

He’d try his hand at poetry again.

But, he knows the truth.

Those poems will never be heard by anyone but him.

“Live in your fantasy,” he mumbles to the cold, empty room.

---

AJ wouldn’t stop talking about the poem.

“I like the part about the stars showering,” he says. “Like, they’re falling to the ground? Can you imagine if all the stars really fell like that?”

Clem smiles. “It’d be quite the sight, wouldn’t it?”

AJ nods. “But,” he holds up the paper, “it couldn’t compare to his crush?”

“So he says.”

Clem had read the poem out loud twice this morning, and each time it made her feel a little more guilty. And a little afraid. What if Aasim happened to walk by and hear them in their room? Not that Aasim ever comes this way, but still.

“So!” AJ rubs his hands together, “where should we start?”

Clem replies, “We should narrow down the suspects.”

“Sus... sussspects?”

“Like, who we think it could possibly be.”

“Well, it’s not me,” AJ says firmly.

“And it’s not me,” Clem agrees. “And, I think it’s safe to cross off Tenn and Willy, too.”

“And Rosie,” AJ adds.

Clem laughs. “Okay, so who do we have left?”

AJ starts counting on his fingers, “Marlon, Violet, Louis...”

“Mitch and Ruby.”

“Mitch, Ruby, um, Brody, Omar...”

Clem says, “I think that’s it.”

“Here,” AJ pulls a wrinkled piece of drawing paper off his desk and a crayon. “Write all the suspects down!”

Marlon Violet Louis Brody Ruby Omar Mitch

“There,” she says.

“So, we gotta see if any of them have freckles, right?”

Clem nods. “That’ll help narrow it down.”

Honestly, she wasn’t sure what to expect. She hadn’t really paid much attention to the tiny details of anyone’s faces.

Well, with one exception-

AJ hurries to the door.

“Hold it, goofball!”

“Clem,” AJ pouts.

“What are the rules?” she says, holding out her hand. AJ reluctantly gives her back the poem.

“You keep the poem,” he mumbles.

“And?”

“And never ever tell Aasim.”

“Right, and don’t tell anyone else,” she pockets both the poem and the list of suspects and nudges him with a smirk, “think of it like we’re undercover detectives. No one can know what we’re investigating.”

AJ grins. “Got it!”

---

AJ’s... not very subtle.

At all.

The second they get outside, his narrowed eyes are darting from one person to the other. He’s tense, ready to strike at any moment.

It’s very obvious that something’s up.

Clem tries to act normal as the two approach Violet.

“Morning, Vi,” Clem greets.

Violet yawns, stretching her arms over her head. “Good morning, I guess. Little cold, though.”

“Seems like summer’s over.”

“Awesome,” Violet sighs. She turns to smile at AJ but is surprised by his overly intense stare.

“Um...?” she quirks a brow. “Are you alright, AJ?”

“Fine!” AJ takes a step towards her. “Hmmm...”

Clem forces an awkward laugh, placing her hand on AJ’s shoulder and pulling him back. He then relaxes, looking up at clem and shaking his head, mouthing quietly, “No freckles.”

Violet shoots Clem a puzzled look.

“AJ’s paranoid,” Clem lies. “Had a, uh, bad dream that one of us is... secretly a robot.”

“Huh?” AJ frowns. Clem pinches him. “Oh! Yeah! Right! Robots!”

“A robot?” Violet scoffs. “Well, hate to disappoint, but I’m human. Though, I’d check up on Marlon.” She smirks, leaning forward and whispering loudly, “Only a machine would think that hair looks cool.”

Clem let out a sigh of relief. Even if Violet doesn’t completely believe them, at least she’s playing along.

“Marlon...?” AJ whips around to search for Marlon. He spots him talking with Brody over by the gates. Before Clem can stop him, he’s wandering over to them.

When he’s out of earshot, Violet says, “Robots, hm?”

“Yeah,” Clem sighs. “Robots.”

“Where’d he learn about robots from?”

“An old book we used to read together.”

“Right...” Violet crosses her arms. “You know, you can talk to me if something’s going on, right?”

Shit.

“Are you sure?” Clem jokes. “You could be a robot trying to trick me into telling you all my secrets.”

“Could be.”

They both watch as AJ stands close to Marlon, pointing up at his face. Marlon’s expression is surprised, and, if Clem’s guessing right, a little offended. Brody chuckles beside them as AJ’s shoulders fall, disappointed.

“Well, guess I should go find Tenn,” Violet says. “Don’t want him to miss breakfast. Talk to you later?”

“Sure,” Clem smiles.

“Have fun finding your ‘robot.’“

Clem nervously waves as her friend walks off.

AJ sulks back over to her, staring down at his feet. “It’s not Marlon,” AJ sighs. “He doesn’t have freckles, he has pimples,” AJ looks away, a little embarrassed, “there’s a difference, I guess.”

“Big difference,” Clem chuckles. “What about Brody?”

“Nope.”

Clem pulls the list out of her pocket.

Marlon Violet Louis Brody Ruby Omar Mitch

“Three down.”

She was positive even before they made the list that Violet wasn’t the one. Sure, she and Aasim got along fine, from what she’s seen, but Clem couldn’t imagine Aasim falling for someone like Violet.

Or Marlon, for that matter. After all, the two of them were constantly fighting about the safe-zone, among other things.

And Brody, well, Clem couldn’t think of a time where she saw Aasim talking with her long enough for any real connection. So, that made sense.

“Look!” AJ points towards the doors where Mitch and Willy are coming out.

Immediately, Clem notices that something’s off with Mitch. He’s hunched over, hand on his stomach and his feet dragging in the dirt. Willy follows him close behind, clearly panicked.

“Suspect!” AJ whispers, already running over there.

“Wait, AJ- ugh!” Clem shoves the list into her jacket and follows.

Mitch seats himself at the table before flopping over, motionless.

“Mitch...?” Willy asks. He pokes the top of Mitch’s head. “Are you dying?”

“Probably,” groans Mitch.

AJ sits next to Willy. “What wrong with him?” he asks.

“I don’t know!” Willy cries. “I found him like this!”

AJ shakes Mitch’s shoulder. “Hey, let me see your face!”

So subtle.

Mitch yanks his head up to stare blankly at AJ, who begins inspecting ever part of Mitch’s face.

AJ pokes his cheek. “Your face is dirty.”

Mitch’s face meets the wooden table with a loud thud and a pained groan.

“Well, well...” Omar’s voice rings behind them. Mitch visibly tenses. “Mitch, what’s wrong?”

“You fuck off, right now.”

“Could it be that you have a stomach ache?”

“No-ugh!” Mitch curls up on himself some more.

Omar shakes his head, placing a hand on Mitch’s shoulder. “Now, what could you have eaten that would make you sick like this?”

“I hate you,” snarls Mitch.

“Could it be, oh, I don’t know, that moldy chunk of beef jerky that I warned you repeatedly to not eat?”

Mitch snaps up, glaring at Omar’s smug face. “I don’t have a stomach ache!” he exclaims. “I feel fucking fantastic! Best I’ve felt in weeks!”

“Oh, really,” Omar says flatly.

“I feel so good I could fight a fucking bear.”

“A bear? Well, in that case,” Omar gestures over to where breakfast is cooking, “I guess you’ll need an extra helping of rabbit so you can be extra strong for that bear-”

Omar doesn’t get to finish. Mitch is up and running back towards the trees with a hand over his mouth. Clem doesn’t dare look, but oh, she can hear everything.

Omar cringes. “Told him not to eat it.”

“Man...” Willy frowns. “He gonna be okay?”

“Yeah,” Omar smiles. “He’ll feel better once it’s all out. I brought out a water bottle for him, too. He’s gonna need to hydrate after all that.”

Willy leaves the table to run over to Mitch. They watch as Willy pats the vomiting boy’s back.

AJ leans over and whispers to Clem, “It’s not Mitch. No freckles, just dirt.”

Clem nods. She figured. Mitch doesn’t seem like Aasim’s type, anyway. Although, that would’ve been an interesting turn of events. What a couple they’d turn out to be.

Marlon Violet Louis Brody Ruby Omar Mitch

More disgusting dry heaving sounds can be heard.

Omar tsks before turning to Clem. “Breakfast’ll be done soon. Wanna do me a favor?”

“Uh, sure?” She really hopes it doesn’t involve cooking with him. She’d never do that again.

“I’m gonna make up a plate for Louis. When you’re done eating, wanna take it up to him?”

AJ jumps up. “Yes!”

“Great,” Omar seems pleased with AJ’s enthusiasm and doesn’t notice the boy’s inconspicuous inspection of his face. “Figured he’d want something. He didn’t look too good this morning.”

Clem’s brows furrow. “Like Mitch, or...?”

“Like he was sleep walkin’ with Marlon dragging him by his ear.”

“That good, huh?”

“Yeah,” Omar chuckles. “I made him some coffee. Hopefully, he’s perked up by now.”

Omar leaves them to check on the food.

Clem sighs. “It’s not Omar,” she whispers.

AJ shakes his head. “Not a single dot.”

Marlon Violet Louis Brody Ruby Omar Mitch

She frowns. “That leaves us with two suspects.”

“Louis and Ruby,” AJ says. He’s anxious, Clem can tell. “Which one do you think it is?”

“...I don’t know.”

They grab their breakfast and sit down. Clem has to tell him several times to slow down before he chokes, and that even if he does finish, he’d have to wait until she’s finished, as well.

While he wasn’t the most patient of them all, Clem couldn’t say she didn’t understand. Honestly, she was just as anxious to see Louis.

Though, that does bring up a problem, one that she’d been ignoring.

She knows for an absolute fact that Louis has freckles.

She knows this because she’s spent plenty of time staring at his face.

She also knows that Louis and Aasim are almost always paired up to go hunting.

Louis and Aasim talk.

A lot.

It’s not impossible that Aasim could have feelings for Louis, and it’s definitely not impossible that the poem could be about him.

But... it’s also totally possible for the poem to be about the other remaining person on her list.

Ruby.

Clem can’t remember if she has freckles or not. But, if she does...

This might mean they need to find a new clue.

---

He’s not hungry, he decides.

Aasim finds himself back in bed with his head tucked under the pillow and the blanket wrapped around his body.

He decides, for today, that he doesn’t want to exist.

He just wants to sleep.

He’ll exist again tomorrow.

But, not today.

He forces himself to count sheep. He pictures them jumping over a white picket fence. One, two, three...

He counts so that he doesn’t think of anything else.

Four, five, six...

Nothing but sheep.

And a knock on his door.

“Aasim?” Marlon’s voice calls. “You in there?”

He remains silent, unmoving.

“C’mon, dude! Breakfast’s ready!”

No.

“Remember, you and Louis got hunting duty today!”

No.

The doorknob wiggles and his stomach drops. He can hear Marlon step in.

“Aasim?”

“I’m sick,” he lies unconvincingly.

“Yeah, me too, buddy. Now, get your ass up.”

Ugh.

---

When Clem turns around with the food in her hand, she sees AJ already climbing up the ladder to meet Louis. She thanks Omar and quickly follows after him.

“Louis!” She hears AJ enthusiastically greet.

“Hm? Oh, hey, little dude.” Louis isn’t so excited. His voice is deeper than usual and weirdly muffled.

Clem balances the food in one hand and cautiously climbs the ladder.

She nearly snorts at the sight before her.

Louis is sitting on his chair wrapped with a heavy, tattered blanket over his head and shoulders, covering his mouth and nose, only revealing his eyes. Said eyes are half-lidded and unfocused. One hand with an empty cup sticks out from the mess of blanket.

Clearly, this is the perfect guy for lookout duty.

AJ takes the empty cup away from him and sets it aside. “You’re still tired?” he asks. “But, you had coffee. That always wakes me up.”

“Bean juice is just a big, fat lie,” Louis mumbles. “A conspiracy, I say.”

Clem approaches him with a smile and offers him the plate. It takes him a few blinks to register that it’s her.

“Good morning, sunshine,” she teases.

“And, suddenly, I don’t feel like death anymore.” Louis sits up and shrugs the blanket off down to his waist. He takes the plate offered to him and inhales the scent. “Never before has rabbit ever looked so divine,” he offers her a lazy grin, “thank you.” He scoots over, patting the place beside him.

Clem glances away as she feels her lips twitch and curl, but before she can move to sit, AJ lets out a huge gasp. When Clem looks back at them, AJ’s face is inches apart from Louis’. This seems to snap Louis awake as he nearly drops his plate at the sudden closeness.

“Well, uhm, hello, AJ?”

“You have freckles!” AJ points an accusatory finger in Louis’ face, nearly poking him in the eye. “Clem! Louis has freckles!”

Heat rushes through her body and pools in her cheeks.

“AJ!”

AJ pulls back, covering his mouth with both hands to hide his growing smile. He points at Louis again, bouncing with excitement.

Clem is left there, frozen, unsure of what to say. Louis’ wide eyes hold many questions.

“Uh, yes? I’m aware?" Louis says. "Am I missing something here? I think I’m missing something,” he says.

“It’s you! You’re-”

“The robot!” Clem blurts out. “Yep, Louis is the robot! Good job, AJ!”

“...What?” Poor Louis never looked so confused.

From the corner of her eye, she notices AJ’s expression drop, turning into something close to a mixture of embarrassment and guilt. He covers his mouth again. Clem can tell he’s mentally kicking himself for almost exposing their secret.

Louis eyes the two of them. “...I’m sorry, but I must be in a dream or something. Is that what this is? I fell asleep on watch and now I’m a robot? That’s the only explanation. Also, how are my freckles a sign of my being a robot?“

“Well, uh-” Clem bites her lip. “It’s just, AJ had a dream last night that one of us is secretly a robot, and that robot could've had freckles, so he’s a little paranoid,” she lies once again.

AJ’s arms fall loose at his sides. “Yeah.”

“One of us is actually a robot, huh?” Louis thinks about this as he chews his food. “My money’s on Omar. How else is he able to take a rabbit and make it taste good? Only a machine could do that. Except, I don't think Omar has freckles."

"He doesn't," AJ sighs.

"Then again...” Louis frowns, “what if I am the robot, but I just don’t know? Like, I’ve been programmed to think I’m human when really I’m just a bunch of wires and buttons.”

Clem didn’t know what she expected really, but she’s not at all surprised that Louis would be taking this idea personally.

“That would explain that charming sense of humor of yours,” she smirks.

“Hey!”

She takes a spot beside him, pushing aside the blankets. She tosses the binoculars over to AJ to keep him busy. “Anyway, never seen you like this before,” she changes the subject.

Louis readjusts the blanket so that it’s laying over both their laps. “Not exactly a morning person,” he admits. “Or a bean juice person.”

“You gonna be okay to go hunting?”

“Are you coming along?”

“I can.”

“Then I’m more than okay,” he grins, winking at her. She rolls her eyes and turns away to hide her own smile.

“Who’re you hunting with?” AJ asks.

“Who else?” Louis snorts. “Aasim and I are the dream team hunters.”

“Aasim,” AJ repeats slowly. “I like Aasim. He’s nice.”

Clem shoots him a warning look.

But, AJ ignores her. “You like Aasim, too, right Louis?”

Clem has to refrain from smacking her forehead.

“When he’s not being a sourpuss or a buzzkill, sure. Aasim can actually be really cool,” Louis replies, completely oblivious to what’s being insinuated. “And, believe it or not, he does have a sense of humor. Sometimes.”

“So, you guys are friends?” AJ pries.

And Clem hasn't felt this frustrated in a while.

Holy shit.

---

After Marlon barged into his room and forced him out of bed for a second time that morning, Aasim figured counting sheep wasn't written in his fate today. So, up he was and at his desk. His notebook lays open, almost mocking him with the number of scribbles and doodled hearts.

Again and again, he tries to write, tries to push those negative thoughts away. But still, more paper is wasted as he tears pages out and crumples them up.

Hell, he even takes a break from the poetry format and just jots down his feelings.

I want

Aasim sighs.

I want you.

How pathetic.

---

"Louis? You up there?"

Clem looks over the side to see Ruby standing there with her hands on her hips. She waves down at the redheaded girl. "Morning, Ruby!"

"Mornin' Clem! Lou with ya?"

"Doc! You've come to take my place!" Louis gleefully jumps up. He scarfs the last bite of his breakfast and gathers his blanket before motioning towards the ladder. "Ladies first-"

AJ hurries past them both and moves down the ladder.

"Or small child first, whatever."

Clem rolls her eyes, quickly going down to stop AJ from getting too close and personal with Ruby. She’s the only other person on their list, which meant that if she didn't have freckles, then the poem was definitely about Louis.

Mystery solved, she thought bitterly.

But, when she gets down there, she grows worried. AJ's staring up at Ruby.

"Uh-oh," AJ whispers.

"Somethin' wrong, AJ?" Ruby asks.

AJ shakes his head and turns around. He, not so subtly, points at Ruby with a panicked look.

She hears Louis huff from behind. “It’s super uneventful out there. Not a single member of the smelly patrol to report,” he says. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I hear my bed calling-”

“No, you don’t!” Marlon calls over to them, shooting Louis a stern look. “You and Aasim are hunting today!”

“If that’s true then where is he?”

Marlon approaches them.

“He slept in this morning, he’ll be out soon.”

“Slept in?” asks Ruby. “Doesn’t sound like him. Is he sick, too?”

“No,” Marlon answers shortly. He turns back to Louis. “In the meantime, get ready. And,” Marlon points at him, “don’t be late.”

Louis holds his hands up, dropping the blanket as a result. “Excuse me? I’m ready to go, it’s Aasim who’s late. Guess I’ll just have to take Clem instead.”

“Nope,” Marlon shakes his head.

“Why?” Clem questions.

“Need’ja to help Violet and Brody today. They’ve, uh, kind of been on one lately. If you could try and keep the peace, then maybe they could get some actual fishing done, yeah?”

She’s not happy about it, but gathering from Marlon’s tired expression, it’s been a hell of a morning for him. Best not to argue.

“Alright, I’ll find Vi, then.”

“Thanks.”

Louis sighs, disappointed.

“Don’t look so down,” scolds Ruby. “Aasim can’t do all that on his own.”

“Yeah, I know-”

Clem feels AJ tug on her sleeve, pulling her aside.

“Clem,” he whispers, “Ruby has freckles, too!”

“I noticed.”

“So, which one is it?”

“I have no clue.”

AJ reaches into her jacket pocket. “Maybe we should read it again-”

“AJ!” She looks around and smacks his hand away. “Not here.”

“But, Clem!”

“I, ugh, I know you’re curious AJ, but now is not the time. We’ll talk about it later. Don’t let it bother you, and don’t say anything while I’m gone.”

“Okay...” AJ pouts. When Clem’s not looking, AJ sneaks the balled up paper in his fist into his pocket.

---

The air isn't as cold now as the two boys walk through the woods. Louis is close and unaware of how many times he keeps knocking shoulders with him, a stupid grin stuck on his face as he hums quietly to himself. He carries Chairles up on his shoulder and inhales the forest scent deeply. Since they left the gates, he hasn't shut up. Aasim's short with him, barely giving any real responses.

He can't help it, he just... feels so shitty.

He doesn't know why. He felt fine yesterday until bedtime came, and he had a pleasant dream, but... once his thoughts really get the best of him, it's like a switch is flipped and the floodgates of constant annoyance and agitation are opened.

They check the closest traps and find them untouched.

After the third trap, Aasim notices his hand starting to ache. His grip on the bow is tight, stiff. He shifts it to the other hand to stretch out his fingers.

His mind keeps wandering back to the page he wrote before they left, the one where he jotted down all his feelings then proceeded to rip it to shreds.

Because, lately, it seems like everything he writes is just absolute garbage.

"So," Louis starts, "if you could have any superpower in the world, what would it be?"

Aasim frowns. He's not playing this game. “No.”

"The power of 'No,'" Louis thinks about this, "I wouldn't have picked it myself, but it does seem fitting to someone like you."

Aasim tries his best to ignore him.

"Me? I'd have the power to breathe underwater.” Louis sighs then. “I wish Clem could have come with us.”

Of course, he does.

“Yeah,” replies Aasim flatly. “She’d actually help out.”

“Hey, I help. I’m here, aren’t I? In fact, I was ready before you!” Louis protests. “I get things done. Just because I have a different way of doing things then you doesn't mean I'm the slacker here."

Aasim says nothing. He continues to walk until a hand rests on his shoulder, stopping him.

“Alright, grumpy pants, what’s up?”

Aasim shrugs out of his grip and keeps moving. This earns him an elbow to the arm.

“Yoo-hoo, Aasim?” Louis flashes a big grin. “You’ve been like this since we left. Seriously, you look down-”

“Can you just,” Aasim snaps, “shut up. Please.”

Louis stops. He cocks his head, studying Aasim’s disgruntled face with worry. “Dude, are you okay?” he asks. “You’re not usually-”

“No, I’m not okay." Aasim shoves him, hard. "I’m sick of hearing you talk. Just shut up and do what you’re supposed to.” Aasim turns and walks away, still fuming, without another word.

Louis watches him, stunned, hurt. He rubs at the freshly sore part of his chest where Aasim pushed him and follows at a distance.

There aren’t many walkers wandering about. Aasim manages to shoot two rabbits, and they find another one caught in a trap.

Louis says nothing the entire time.

Aasim can feel how heavy the air is between them, and he hates it.

Fucking hell, he hates it.

They come across a walker caught in a trap. It’s missing an arm and a jaw. There’s an arrow sticking out of its shoulder. Skin slides down its bones with every movement.

Louis makes no jokes. He doesn’t toy with the monster. He just takes Chairles, hits the walker twice, successfully killing it, and silently cuts it down while Aasim watches.

The body lands heavy in the dirt. Aasim sets his bow against the tree and grabs the walkers ankles and drags him away. Just as he’s about the reach some bushes, the body gets caught on something.

“Shit,” he mumbles. He hears the sounds of footsteps and Louis’ grunt as he resets the trap. He unhooks the walker's shirt from a rock protruding from the ground. His elbow brushes against the arrow, so he yanks it out. It wasn’t very deep with only the arrowhead being buried within the rotten flesh. Aasim uses his shirt to clean it off, spitting on it to help polish it. He hears a raspy growl from behind him.

Aasim whips around, losing his balance as the new walker stumbles towards him,

“Ah!” Aasim’s hands fly up to shove the walker away from him. The walker falls back, as does he. Immense pain pierces through his side and sends shocks throughout his body.

“Aasim!”

Louis is there, grabbing the back of the walker’s shirt when it tries to crawl towards him and forces the monster back. Aasim rolls onto his side, realizing that he’d fallen onto the arrow. Now, it sticks out of him loosely. “Fuck, fuck!”

The sound of the walker's skull being crushed echoes throughout the forest.

Aasim grinds his teeth together and squeezes his eyes shut. With shaking hands, he yanks the arrow out. “Argh! Fuck!”

Hands are all over him. “Aasim, don’t! Shit!” Louis hikes up Aasim’s jacket to inspect the damage. His flesh is torn, bleeding profusely. Louis, panicked, looks around for something to stop the bleeding before shrugging his jacket off and lifting Aasim up to tie it around his waist.

More horrifying shocks of pain. “Don’t-!” Aasim protests, trying to push Louis away. But, Louis holds his ground, double knotting the sleeves of the jacket around him.

“You’re not bit, right? It didn’t get you?”

“No, shit, it’s just the arrow.”

Aasim tries standing but stumbles. Louis catches him, carefully helping him to his feet.

“Fuck, that hurts,” Aasim groans. He feels tears sting his eyes at the throbbing heat but holds them back.

“Here, let me-”

“I can walk,” snaps Aasim.

Louis takes Aasim’s back and his bow. He keeps a comforting hand on Aasim back as they walk back to the school.

And all Aasim can think is, you fucking idiot.

---

Ruby’s gentle with him.

His back’s to her as she works on stitching up his side. Louis is there, too, keeping a close eye on him and handing Ruby everything she needs.

When they first walked through the gates, Ruby was already grabbing him and chewing Louis out.

Louis tried to explain what had happened, but Ruby was too worried about getting him inside. Marlon and Omar had questioned what happened, but Ruby shooed them out the door. Aasim’s surprised she let Louis stay, though.

Shit.

It’s cold. There are goosebumps rising on his bare back and arms.

He buries his face in the pillow, wishing he could just sleep. But, every time that needle pierces his tender flesh, he’s reminded that sleep is currently just a fantasy.

“You two need to be more careful,” Ruby says.

“I know...” Louis says quietly. “The walker just appeared-”

“You need to be alert, always! What if one of you got bit?”

Aasim squeezes his eyes shut and says, “It’s not his fault.”

Ruby’s hands still.

He continues, “I wasn’t paying attention. He was fixing the trap like I told him to. I was stupid.”

Ruby sighs. “Well... like I said, you both need to be more careful.”

She finishes stitching him up and sits back. “Louis, could’ja fetch some more water, please?”

“Sure.”

He hears Louis leave and close the door. Ruby’s wiping the blood off his skin with a damped towel.

“How does that feel?”

“Fine.”

“Truly?”

“No, it hurts.”

Ruby gives a sympathetic smile. “Well, least yer honest, for the most part. It should start to feel better soon. Wasn’t really all that deep. Ya did do more damage by just yankin’ the arrow out, though. Shoulda left it.”

Aasim nods.

“Hey,” she nudges him. “Aside from the wound, you doin’ okay?”

“Fine,” he repeats.

“I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t have to.”

Her fingers go to brush back the hair that’d fallen over his face. “Heard you slept in. Usually yer an early riser.”

He says nothing.

“I was thinkin’ about somethin’ today. It just occurred to me, really,” she says. “Do you remember that time we were in the green house and Mitch dared you to eat one of the mushrooms growing?”

A smile sneaks its way onto his lips. “But then I challenged him to a mushroom eating contest?”

“And he ate, like, six of ‘em while you didn’t eat any,” she giggles. “He certainly was a winner.”

“Was he, though?”

“Surprised he lived though that, honestly.”

“Some things never change.”

“No, not really...” Ruby sighs with a sweet smile. “Y’know, if ya ever wanna talk, I’m here.”

“...I know.”

Ruby stands. “You should be okay to walk around, jus’ don’t strain yerself, okay? Do ya need any help getting dressed?”

“No.”

“I’ll leave you to it, then.” Just as she’s about to leave, she turns and says, “I’m glad yer alright, Aasim.”

He starts to count sheep.

---

Eventually, after a few hours or so, he does get up. After he’s dressed and heads outside, he’s greeted by almost everyone, checking up on him and making sure he’s okay. He doesn’t see Clem, Violet or Brody anywhere, or Mitch, for that matter. He does spot Louis on the couch by himself, shuffling a deck of cards with a faraway gaze.

He knows he should go over there and apologize, but fuck, he can’t bring himself to do it.

He sits on the steps in front of the entrance, wincing at the pain aching in his side. He huffs, rubbing at his tired eyes. He wished he’d just stayed in bed. What a shitty day.

“Hi, Aasim.”

He’s startled by AJ. “Oh, uh, hey.”

“How’s your side?”

“Hurts, but I’m fine.”

“Good. I’m glad.”

Aasim nods, not sure what else to say. He does notice that the child seems nervous. It’s likely that he doesn’t know what to say, either.

“Aasim?”

“Yeah?”

AJ looks away and starts fumbling with his hands.

“I’m sorry,” he finally says.

Aasim raises a brow. “Okay...?” he says. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not like you stabbed me.”

“No, not that.”

“Oh...” Aasim frowns. “What, then?”

AJ then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. “This is yours.” He moves up the stairs and hands Aasim the paper. Then, he begins to ramble. “I-I didn’t show anybody, and I really like it, you know. I don’t completely get it but I like the way some parts sound.”

“What are you-”

Aasim unfolds the paper.

a thousand stories I could write about us in the night sky

His heart plummets into his stomach.

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