#peak comedy right here bois

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Peter Falk (The Great Race, Robin and the 7 Hoods)—let me just quote Frank Capra: "the entire production was agony ... except for Peter Falk. He was my joy, my anchor to reality. Introducing that remarkable talent to the techniques of comedy made me forget pains, tired blood, and maniacal hankerings to murder Glenn Ford (the film's star)." i also just find scrungly little guys to be the peak of attraction.

Conrad Veidt (The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, The Man Who Laughs)—the ultimate goth boy! as well as classics like the cabinet of dr caligari, the man who laughs (which his character in was the visual inspiration for the joker) and casablanca, he starred in the german polemic melodrama different from the others in 1919 in one of the first sympathetic portrayals of gay characters in cinema, co-written by the gay researcher & activist magnus hirschfeld much of whose pioneering research on human sexual diversity was destroyed by the nazis

This is round 3 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut]

[editor's note: I received such an enormous volume of propaganda for Veidt I could only include some of it here—and unfortunately Tumblr isn't letting me repost any gifs at all, which I didn't expect! Please don't be offended if something you sent in didn't make the cut.]

"Just look at him your honor. Ich würde"

Submitted: Tumblr thread on Veidt

Submitted: Tumblr post on Veidt

Peter Falk propaganda:

"listen Peter Falk saved the day for me in robin in the 7 hoods. he saved me in it's a mad mad mad mad world. he damn right resuscitated me in the great race. every movie this man is in is made better by his presence and he should eat the competition alive."

Submitted: "1:56:30 on for Peter Falk's ass in It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. yes he falls off a building yes he drives a cab yes he hates the cops"

[mono-dot-jpeg]

conversations and quality time - d. malleus, s. idia, h. rook, & t. ace

summary; "i want a man who can yap, so i can enjoy his existence and ignore my own." - me

genre/extra tags; scenarios/hcs, shamelessly writing about my type of men, ranking (but not really) twst boys based of how much i would enjoy their yapping when im feeling empty, fluff, slightly comedy, ace is a loveable dickhead, idia and i are nearly one in the same (im sorry), gaming knowledge included (knowledge not required, it's funnier), rook is rook (and i love that for him), established relationships with all (dating), mischaracterization probably, reader is NOT YUU, written by someone who wishes to have moments like these with a friend, idia is my obvious favorite here im not sorry abt it

a/n; as the summary says. i thought of this like,,, at midnight and i thought abt characters i like and how they would ramble bc i love asmr where people just talk since i slept a lot surrounded by people talking casually during parties and it helps me just silence the raging storm in my mind about being a shitty adult

malleus draconia finds you with no troubles. he always knows when you're available most of the time. and he's always excited to be around his human companion. and he's even more excited to just spend time with you in general.

he could talk on and on for hours. and he does just that when he knows that you're not feeling very talkative or when you're feeling non-verbal. sometimes you just want to enjoy his presence, you like being in the moment. he doesn't question it at all. he knows that sometimes you might not catch everything he's saying, but he can't find it in himself to be frustrated at you.

his voice is so tender and gentle when it comes to being around you. just the right amount of deepness without sounding too rumbly(?). he talks about his interests or his day. sometimes, he even talks about his home if he feels like it. he lets you lay all over him if you want, while he talks. occasionally, he just stops talking to bask in your presence and how much he loves you.

he would read you a story if you asked him

10/10 would fall asleep to his voice

never gets mad if it happened

peak quality time

he would even sit in silence with you if you wanted to

idia shroud is the type of guy to not say anything about his interests until you ask. so you gotta initiate first, and then he just starts... and he doesn't stop. you ask one thing about the game he's playing all of a sudden, he's talking to you about this moba game that has shitty adcs and bad junglers? you might not understand anything of what he's saying, but he's so cute when he's passionate.

depending on the game he's talking about, his voice can change pretty quickly. he's a little squirrel-y but that's the charm of it all. he's more emotional about things that he would like to admit. crying over a lost 50/50 chance for his ssr roll, yelping upon getting dove under tower by 4 other players, complaining about grinding for materials for the newest armor set, laughing about how everyone is bad at the game except him then proceeding to cry about how he's bad at the game upon dying after his previous statement.

the only time he is calm is when he's lying in bed with you. he's still a little panicky, but that's just how he is. he ends up playing his mobile games to calm himself down. if you're lucky, you crawl into his arms without making him too flustered. (he's still getting used to having you in his arms and not a plain pillow.) this section is getting long, but his voice is quiet (when he's not playing a pvp game), deep but not as deep as malleus, but his voice is still like a warm fresh baked cookie or as warm as a nice home. and when he's just whispering to not disturb you... god, what i would do to make that happen for me..

god i love him.. he would do his damn hardest to make sure you're comfortable

he's not one for silent quality time imo

9/10 if you like gamer vibes, 5/10 if you don't like loud

but i love loud but not deafening.

the kind of person i would fall asleep in a discord chat with (not even a discord kitten joke. /gen)

rook hunt doesn't need to even be seen to be spending time with you. you somehow match his freak, and don't find yourself being scared when you feel his lingering presence. for all the compliments and praises he sings every day, he's also very quiet when he wants to be.

you've been dating him long enough to see him as a guardian angel more than a hunter, and he knows it. during the times he does decide to actually be around and not hide in a tree, he's the type of guy to gently praise you until you sleep or talk about every detail about you that he adores.

his voice is low and sweet. he talks quietly with an elegant softness that most pomefiore members are trained to have. when he speaks about things of beauty, he holds an air of admiration and adoration. it's mostly evident when it comes to you.

he would cure all my insecurities

he's so caring, he's literally that cute drawn emoji of just "holds in hands gently"

8/10, i can't handle too much praise, i simply die /j

giving guardian angel in an oddly endearing way

he is gentlemanly elegance !!

ace trappola is a tsundere. you hate to hear it. but he is, sometimes. but he's deceptively caring. he's grumbling about just simply wanting to sit around and do nothing but be near each other but he loves it. he's the one who somehow gaslights you (jokingly) into just sitting together or laying together into moments like these. he'll complain but he's giving you a blanket or tugging you into his hold while he's muttering like a grumpy kid.

he really is the kind of boyfriend who is really a best friend before anything. he's definitely sharing gossip and yapping away as you sit there in his arms, enjoying the way he speaks with energy and drama. he's a little dramatic but when is he not? though there's definitely been a moment where he drops some random lore/gossip about some person and you can't help but laugh in shock because how did he get this information?

his voice is kind of warm? it's hard to explain, but his voice is warm and has a natural mischievous tone to it. he talks to you like you've been around him for years and not just when you first met around the first days of being at nrc. he talks to you like you were his first friend. he's endearing.

he would annoy you if you fell asleep while he was talking

would poke, prod, squish whatever bit of body his hands could get to

9/10, -1 bc being ticklish with ace around is a play fight waiting to happen

giving friends to lovers sweethearts and i love it

we love a grumpy but loving boyfriend !!

[maxtermind]

SCENE 2 :: HOW MUCH TRAGEDY ↳ you were never not mine — carlos sainz ༉‧₊˚✧

★ : pairing :: carlos sainz x reader ★ : genre :: angst; fluff separated by a hidden emotional turmoil, carlos and y/n navigate the complexities of co-parenting their twins amidst the high-stakes f1 world. amidst paddock visits and personal healing, will they go further apart or find their way back to each other? ★ : a/n :: text posts are going to return from tom till then you can enjoy this<3 taglist form is in the series masterlist btw!! HATS OFF TO EVERY SINGLE SMAU WRITER BECAUSE THIS IS SO HARD LMAO

( series masterlist \ main masterlist \ drop a request )

carlos is typing... (y/n's pov)

f1 10 mins ago

f1 LET'S GET THE EUROPEAN LEG OF THE SEASON STARTED! 🇮🇹

username oh the admin knows what they did with carlos at the front lmao username can't wait for the races! let's goooo! 🇮🇹🏁 username so excited for this leg of the season! bring it on! 🤩 username hoping for some amazing races! good luck to all the drivers! 🙌 username here for the racing, not y/n’s drama ⤷ username ugh yes like can we focus on racing and not y/n’s drama? username italy, here we come! forza ferrari! ❤️ ⤷ username poor carlos, dealing with y/n’s drama and still racing username ready for some intense racing action! 🏎🔥 username who else is here for the drama? carlos and y/n's relationship update please! 😂 ⤷ username i hope carlos and y/n figure things out. it was so nice seeing her at the race again

yn.user 20 mins ago

yn.user behind every successful man is his loving fam❤️ congratulations papa sainz

username this is a joke, right? after all the drama? lilymhe wow such a hottie and a MOM? smash! ⤷ yn.user date and time🙏 ⤷ alexalbon uhm... im right here? username weren't you just out with another man? hypocrite ⤷ username loving fam? like she didn't just get caught with another guy? 😂 username wow, pretending everything is fine now? ⤷ username guess she's trying to clean up her image good luck with that username this is so fake everyone knows the truth username acting like a loving family after everything? sure, y/n ⤷ username like who the fuck are you fooling, y/n? we know the real story username you're so pretty, y/n! i bought the tickets just to see you irl username didn't take long for the fake posts to start

carlossainz 20 mins ago

carlossainz victory feels even sweeter with my kids by my side!🏆❤️

username congrats, carlos! the kids are your ONLY real supporters. username so glad you’re focusing on the kids and not the drama. ⤷ username victory without y/n? this is peak comedy😭 ⤷ username way to go, carlos! the kids are all you need! username finally, a win focused on the right people. congrats, carlos! username oh god we really lost the great war huh username great win, carlos! the kids must be so proud. ⤷ username this is the content we love. kids over drama! username well done! no need for distractions we're so proud❤️ ⤷ username the kids are his real mvps so lol username congrats, carlos! the kids are your biggest fans.

twitter

boo is typing... (y/n's pov)

lily is typing… (y/n's pov)

yn.user 20 mins ago

yn.user as my boys said: finally a worthy opponent✨

username this is why some people shouldn't have kids. username she's a mess. no wonder they broke up ⤷ username using her kids for attention. disgusting! carlossainz so you're also bad at scrabble? ⤷ username oh shit carlos didn't come to play ⤷ username you tell her carlos!! username no stability for those poor kids with her around. ⤷ username kids must be so confused with a new man every week username pathetic attempt to make carlos jealous. GROW UP, Y/N!!!

carlos is typing… (y/n's pov)

instagram stories

©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.

[tempting-andromeda]

I missed my boys so I’m back at headcanons

Misc headcanons

Characters: Arthur Morgan, John Marston, Dutch Van Der Linde, Charles Smith, Javier Escuella, Sean MacGuire, Lenny Sunmers, Kieran Duffy, Micah Bell, Eagle Flies

Arthur Morgan

Super awkward about gift giving but he loves giving you little trinkets from his adventures. Like a small flower or a pretty Little Rock

He’s just like “here” drops it in your hand and then stands there awkwardly

Doesn’t hide his facial expressions as well as he thinks he does.

He loves to gossip. If you tell him something juicy he acts like he doesn’t care but he’ll drop something even crazier with a smirk

Reluctantly tells you about his adventures but he just doesn’t want to brag

John Marston

Every time he asks for you to bathe with him it ends up with him getting a scrub down instead of getting headed (he doesn’t know why he expects anything else anymore)

Thinks burps are peak comedy.

He likes when you ask his opinion about things even though he’ll bullshit his way through

Like a purple or blue shirt? Hmm it’s cold so wear the blue one because blue is for cold.

Accidentally shows his buttcrack a lot. His pants just never sit on his hips right and I just…I can feel it.

Dutch Van Der Linde

He likes dates where you two go out into Saint Denis and pretend to be someone else for the night.

Likes picking out your outfits for you. He finds it romantic.

Has a thing for helping you tie or buckle your shoes

Always thinks the smallest knees is the biggest news or the other way around

Tries to dance with you in the most random of moments. Like you’re a little pissed about something and he’ll come up to you and just start swaying

Charles Smith

Cannot stand when people share food by sucking on peoples fingers. Like when people dip their finger into the cake batter and share it.

Has the most obvious side eye ever. He simply cannot hide it.

Favorite cuddling position is where you lay on top of him

He doesn’t drink much but when he does he’s a completely different person.

Will bluntly ask you a weird question like “what alcohol do you think would be your horse’s favorite”

Javier Escuella

Likes lipstick marks. Thinks it’s one of the most attractive things ever. Has a shirt where you left a lipstick stain on the collar

Says the sassiest shit under his breath 5 minutes after it’s relevant and gets pissed

Rehearses a conversation in his head before he has it

Makes you learn Spanish for “code words” but reallt he just wants to teach you Spanish

Has a habit of repeating words just for himself outside of conversations

Sean MacGuire

He thinks he’s the suavest mother fucker around. He will randomly share how he pulled you to random people

Makes the worst inside jokes he’ll never drop

Loves to spin you around randomly. He doesn’t care if you hate it.

Keeps food in his pockets (sometimes wrapped in cloth) and doesn’t see a problem with it

Thinks cringy pet names are the best like “snugglemuffin”

Lenny Summers

One of his favorite dates are leisurely strolls

He liked when you help him get dressed. Like help him with his vest

Idk why I think he has like the same idea as romance as those really happy old people

Likes when you keep him company while he’s patrolling

Loves cheek kisses! One of his favorite things ever!

Kieran Duffy

He likes to join you if you have a self care routine.

Likes to share things with you. Like some food or his clothes.

Makes the most out there “what ifs” or “would you rather” questions

Just casually knows how to do decent hairstyles because he got bored while working with the horses.

Wakes up too easily. At the smallest thing. You could twitch and he’s stirring awake

Micah Bell

Thinks it’s funny to ghost you. He always says stuff like “distance makes the heart grow fonder”

Really good at catching flies and mosquitoes

Will prompt the weirdest shit as if it’s normal just to fuck with you

Will give you the meanest compliments like “I hate inbreds…not you though” because he thinks it’s charming AND funny

Randomly gives you a good shove every now and then

Eagle flies

He absolutely loves getting a rise out of you like sometimes he does something stupid just for you to scold him

Affectionally bites. At first it was a joke but now he just casually does it. He’ll grab your hand and pressed a light bite to your wrist

Gets comfortable in the weirdest positions. Even while cuddling.

Talks about your future with him way too soon.

He thinks it’s funny to randomly “propose” to you

[kiwisluv]

jude bellingham blurb - barca vs psg

reader x bf!jude

set during the barca vs psg leg 2 champions league match

1.4k words - i guess not really a blurb at this point😭 also not proofread soz xx

You and your best friend were sat in the tv lounge at your uni, watching the Barcelona vs PSG game since you had downtime between classes. A little bit into the first half, a group of three boys had come by to ask if they could watch the game with you two, and you obliged, figuring it wouldn't do any harm.

By the time the second half started, you and your friend were regretting your mistake. The three boys were yapping about the game the entire time, which wouldn't have been terrible if it wasn't so obvious that they were trying to flex their "superior" knowledge about footy. The two of you just kept to yourself, making a quiet comment to each other about the game here and there, but you couldn't help but make eye contact every time one of the men confidently remarked about the game, only to be making an incorrect statement. It was almost laughable the amount of times they had messed up; when their fourth friend came at halftime, one of the men loudly went, "Bro, PSG just got a red card then scored on the penalty kick." You couldn't even wrap your head around how the boy could've mistaken what he was watching THAT badly. At one point, you could barely hold back your giggles as your best friend tweeted, "Barcelona fans are the type of people to stare straight into the sun during the solar eclipse."

You had also been texting Jude throughout the game, knowing he couldn't talk right now because the team was prepping for tomorrow, but still sending him your commentary like you always did for him to read later. This included texts like "RED CARDDDDD THIS IS PEAK COMEDY FROM BARCA" and "XAVI GETTING SENT OFF I'M DYINGGGGG!!!!!!" It's safe to say that you were happy to see the downfall of Jude's rival club. At one point early in the second half, you saw the photos of Jude from his press conference and showed your friend excitedly, raving about how fit he was, and laughing at one of the videos of him trying to understand a Spanish interviewer. When they boys caught notice of this, they side eyed each other, assuming that you were just some girls who didn't even care about football and just watched for the fit guys. This got them chatting even louder, reallyyy trying to show off their ball knowledge now. Because of your mention of Jude, they started talking about tomorrow's games and proceeded to rant about how City was gonna blow out Madrid. This struck a nerve in you but you decided to bite your tongue and just focus on the game and your friend instead of biting at their bait.

After Mbappe's second goal, you were absolutely raving, texting Jude something along the lines of "KYKYYYYYYYY." You cheered with your friend as the boys sulked further into their chairs, obviously unhappy with the scoreline. "I love my man, but Kyks..." you joked to your friend as you watched PSG celebrating all over the screen. "Can't wait for you to come to Madrid baby," you joking said to the TV screen, your friend giggling at your ridiculousness. This fit was interrupted, though, as your phone started buzzing and Jude's contact picture (a quite unflattering photo of him sleeping) filled your phone. Your heart instinctually swelled at the thought of speaking to your boyfriend, and you quickly answered the call. "Please tell me you just saw that goal," you said as soon as Jude's face filled the screen. It looked as if he was done with training and sitting in the team's makeshift common area. You could hear some of his teammates messing around in the background and even saw Cama passing by in the background.

"Well hello to you too," Jude said jokingly. You rolled your eyes at his sassiness, choosing to ignore this comment and ask if he was watching the game.

Unbeknownst to you, the four boys sat in the room with you were absolutely flabbergasted. They were looking at each other with the widest eyes, unable to believe what they were hearing. Your friend saw this, biting back her smirk at their reaction. "Hiya Jude," she greeted, peaking her head into the frame to say hi to your boyfriend, who she was also quite close with.

"Hi!" he smiled back with a wave to the camera. "And yes, I'm watching the game. We just got done with training."

"We watched some of your press conference earlier. It was alright," you joked to the man. This time it was his turn to roll his eyes. "Kidding, of course. You looked sexy," you said with an overdramatic wink. You couldn't hold back your laughter at the silly remark. "But for real, your answers were perfect. You actually sounded very competent and not nearly as cocky as you actually are."

"Wow. Thanks for that," he said in fake annoyance.

"I've already got screenshots of it in my camera roll."

"You're a creep," he deadpanned. "I can't believe my girlfriend is a groupie."

This had you gasping, holding your hand to your heart as you feigned offence. "Alright, goodbye now Jude." You pretended to go to hang up the phone but were cut off by Jude going "No no no no!"

After that little fit, he asked you about how your day was, how your assignments were going, etc. He even asked your friend about how her date was last night, surprising you that he even remembered about that. She took the phone from you to debrief your boyfriend about her night, telling him the story of the crazy guy she'd had dinner with. As the two chatted away, you watched the last few minutes of the game, feeling warm inside at how happy you were with Jude and how happy you were that he got along with your friends so well.

However, your thoughts were interrupted by the four boys, who had stood up and walked over to you. You looked at them puzzled, having a hunch about what they wanted. "Hey, um, we were just wondering..." one of the boys started, obviously nervous about whatever he was going to say. At this point, you knew what they wanted, and you couldn't believe the nerve they had after slagging off Madrid mere minutes ago.

"If you could say hi to Jude?" you finished the question for him. They sheepishly nodded, one of the others adding, "We're big fans."

You held back your eye roll at that last statement, taking the phone from your friend and turning it so that the boys could see Jude and vice versa. "Jude, these are the guys that were just chatting all about how City's gonna win tomorrow." You couldn't see your boyfriend's face, but you imagined him raising his eyebrows at this statement. You and your friend laughed at how caught off guard the boys were by your statement. They looked panicked, all four of them standing with their mouths hung open but not saying anything.

"Oof," Jude shook his head on the screen. "Don't say that around y/n. She'll have your necks for talking down on Madrid."

At this, the frontmost of the boys scratched his neck and laughed nervously. "Um, we didn't mean it like that...we were just, um, talking about the odds and stuff..." he tried to scrap up a pathetic excuse.

"What team do you lads support?" Jude asked.

The four looked at each other as if they were unsure of whether to tell the truth or not. "Barca..." one ended up saying quietly. His friend widened his eyes at this, quickly adding on, "But we think you're class! You've been mental to watch this season."

"Thanks, mate. I'll have to tell the Barca lads even their fans are supporting Madrid this season! No wonder with the state of this game." At this, you brought your phone back to face you, giving the boys a look as to say, Okay, you can go now. You almost felt a little bad for embarrassing them but then remembered how annoying they were during the game and didn't regret a thing. "You're brutal," Jude said, shaking his head at your antics.

"They were annoying," you replied with a shrug. "I think I have to go to class now. I'll call you before our train to Manchester leaves tonight."

He smiled widely at this, ecstatic that he would get to see you after his game tomorrow. "Okay. I can't wait to see you. You too (y/bsf/n)!"

"Yeah, yeah. Me too. I love you, bye!"

"Love you, too." he smiled brightly before hanging up the phone.

-

[strongheartneteyam]

[ all credits of the Neteyam pic go to the incredibly talented @cinetrix ♡]

Champagne Problems

Part 2

Pairing: Neteyam Sully x female!human!reader

CW: neteyam is a simp for reader, black cat gf/golden retriever bf "trope", a whole lot of angst, beach party, use of alcohol, some romantic comedy vibes, neteyam acting a bit cocky lol, reader is a tiny bit of a meanie towards neteyam, sexual language, sexual content, reader is a bit antisocial, flirting, emotionally unavailable bc of trauma reader, unrequited love (neteyam is the one having the unrequited feelings), sexual tension, commitment issues, exophilia, size kink, interspecies relationship, bad words. Hit me up to lemme know if I forgot something ahaha

Synopsis: Neteyam has had his eye on you for long but you always kept him away, at a safe distance. You have no feelings for him after all, you only think he's really attractive... right? What happens when he starts flirting with you at a Metkayina beach party and he just won't give it up? Will you finally give him a chance to show you how he feels or will you keep hiding behind the armor that you have for a heart? Neteyam is known among the na'vi as persistent and everybody knows he doesn't back off from a challenge. And you're his favorite one.

Reader is slightly older than Neteyam, for only 2 years.

Neteyam and Reader (AI Art)

Do you guys remember the story inspired by Champagne Problems by Taylor Swift that I promised like ages ago? Well... The first part is here? 🤓 A lot of people seemed to be excited to read this when I posted that sneak peak. Hope you guys like it! kiss kiss 💗

Slightly proofread.

Part 1 : Say Yes to Heaven

𓇼

If you dance, I'll dance

And if you don't, I'll dance anyway

Give peace a chance

Let the fear you have fall away

I've got my eye on you

(...)

Say yes to Heaven, say yes to me

Say Yes To Heaven (Lana Del Rey)

𓇼

"It's not like you're not gonna break me in half if we try to get down and dirty." You laugh a bit too much, the alcohol invading your brain slowly, making you care less and less about behaving in a "socially acceptable" way. Though you wondered if your not-a-bit-elegant-honesty mattered at all to Neteyam Sully, the na'vi boy sitting in the maroon leather couch, by your side, his huge size making the couch look ridiculously small. He was na'vi, after all. Totally different culture. The na'vi were way more upfront about their real thoughts and feelings.

Neteyam had been talking loudly, almost yelling, at your ear for the past 40 minutes, trying to make his voice sound louder than the party's music, so you could hear him try to convince you to hook up with him. As if the loud uplifting songs that echoed in the salty air of that Metkayina beach were not enough to bug your tired head, now you had Neteyam helping your headache get worse.

"That doesn't mean you can't let me take you home. Or even let me make you my mate, eventually, if we end up falling in love while we fuck under the starry sky. You might like laying with me in my hammock and letting me pleasure you more than you think. Maybe you'll want to be my girl once you get a taste of this na'vi spice" He was joking around with you while flirting.

His thick, muscular but still fleshy thighs were spread on the sofa way too much to your liking. It was almost like he was trying to show you how masculine or desirable - some bullshit like that - he was. You know, that kind of thing a lot of guys usually do when trying to seduce you.

You knew Neteyam was aware he was handsome, that his body was attractive. He had always had girls - na'vi and human - all over him since he was a teen, drooling over his beauty.

But if he thought his loverboy flirting that must have worked so easily with just way too many girls before was gonna work that easily with you, he was mistaken.

Okay, you had to admit he was being pretty insistent, though. Neteyam had been there for almost an hour already. You did not understand what was making him insist that much on you if you had an armor as impenetrable as the one of a human warrior of the Middle Ages, back on Earth. And those armors were really hard to get under.

"Listen" you took a last big sip of your champagne and put the glass cup on the wooden table next to the sofa "When you gonna give up, honey? It's not gonna work. I'm not hooking up with you." You looked him in the eyes.

Goddamn, were his orbs big compared to the ones of a human. 

They were beautiful, though.

Damn, (y/n)! Focus, girl!

"I'm known among my people for being disciplined, focused and getting what I want because I fight hard for it. You're my focus now, tawtute." (human) I'm not giving up on you. You're like my Ikran. You're wild and hard to get but I'll conquer you, sevin tawtute." (pretty human) "On the first try."

"Cocky much?" You smirked and shook your head in disapproval "No, but, seriously, Neteyam, are you out of your mind? Have you forgotten about tsaheylu? I don't have a neurological queue, babe. I know I have many braids in my hair," You pointed out your hairstyle "but they're all regular human braids. None of them have little tendrils on its tip. Sorry, Neteyam. We're Romeo and Juliet. And Juliet doesn't even love Romeo in this story. You're deemed to heartbreak." You said, like you could not care less about his attempts to win you over, sipping on your sparkling champagne, that went down your throat comfortably, making you feel cozy and safe. It wasn't gonna work, anyway.

You liked champagne a bit too much... you had to admit it was very possible that you had a bit of a drinking problem. Alcohol made you feel warm inside. In an emotional way too. It felt like someone was hugging you, when you would not let many real people hug you because you just were not exactly enthusiastic about having physical contact with just anyone. You only let your closest friends and some family members, like your little sister, hug you. 

Some people would often call you "cold" and say that you acted "like a queen, above everyone else", behind your back, but that could not be further from the truth. You actually hated how low your actual self steem was.

"Why don't you look at Munì?" You mentioned the curvy, tall, blue eyed Metkayina girl who clearly had a mad crush on Neteyam. She was incredibly pretty. Nobody could deny that. "She has been drooling over you ever since you got here. Give the poor girl a chance. She's such a cutie. If I liked girls, I'd easily do her. Look at those beautiful, long, toned legs. Look at her wide hips. Damn, she's yummy!" you were drinking too much, your honesty getting way too out there.

"I don't want her. I want you." He spoke, like he really meant it. "My hammock will be hanged between those two big trees you like to collect fruits from. I'll be waiting for you, if you want to meet me."

With that last line being said, Neteyam got up from the sofa and walked away, swiftly finding his younger brother Lo'ak and tapping on his back, like men usually do. Both brothers started what looked like an interesting conversation.

You were left alone wondering how Neteyam could say those words and walk away so nonchalantly. 

"Phew! I thought he'd never leave, girlie." Adeline screamed, coming closer to you.

She was your best friend. You guys knew way too much about each other, but that only drove you closer and made you two have a beautiful bond that felt unbreakable. She was one of the few people in the world you trusted with many of your secrets. But not even she knew everything about you. Yes, talk about trust issues…

"God, I was about to call his sister to take him away! Kiri is much more chill and quiet compared to her siblings. She's a sweetheart." You said, finally letting your guard down and being able to relax your body language, laying back on the couch and resting your bare feet on the wooden dark brown table in front of you

𓇼

You cursed yourself while you walked towards Neteyam's big light brown hammock, hanged between two big beautiful trees that reminded you of the Palm Trees that used to exist on Planet Earth.

Why were you doing that, anyway?

"Tawtute! You came." Neteyam smiled, relief all over his face 

You sighed.

"Yeah, but I'm still wondering why I did."

"Ouch!" He put his huge four fingered hand on his chest and frowned, like he was in pain

You rolled your eyes at him.

"Stop that, silly." Crossing your arms, you walked towards the big tropical tree in front of his hammock but still a little far

"Hey! Where are you going?" Neteyam almost screamed as you were already further away from him than you should be if you were actually gonna have sex with him

It was like you were running away from and showing up to the "job" at the same time. Go figure out.

You rested your back against that large tree, feeling the rough edges of the wood harassing your skin.

Neteyam was already almost there where you were. His long na'vi legs helped him walk faster than you anticipated.

Neteyam got next to you. You felt a little fear but a bit of excitement, simultaneously, when you realized your head only reached his hip.

Fuck, he was a giant next to you… why the hell did that turn you on?

"Are you afraid of me, yawntutsyìp?" (little loved one) Neteyam said in a lewd, low voice as you looked at him, feeling like a pathetic little ant looking up at a human

Was that how ants felt?

"No, silly, I'm not." You looked away from him and tried to focus on the way the eclipse had beautiful violet and blue tones

That almost worked. If it wasn't for Neteyam using his huge alien hand to stroke your hair softly.

"You're so pretty, tawtute." You could feel his gaze directed at you, you could feel his heat burning your skin. The desire he felt for you was almost freaking tangible. 

You kept your eyes on the stars.

"You're not gonna look at me, yawntutsyìp? Lemme see those pretty eyes, hmm?" Fuck, he was turning you on so much, your pussy felt good already and there was a tight knot forming in your lower belly. How did he do that to you with so little effort?

You looked up at Neteyam's face, your neck hurting. You did not expect to see a big bulge under his navy blue loincloth, though. Neteyam was so huge you could not help staring and your face totally betrayed your surprise.

"C'mon, I wanna feel your tiny body on mine." He paused and his big blue hand traced your collarbone and your shoulders "You're so small, tawtute… Hmmm…" he let out something between a moan and a growl "So soft too." Neteyam squeezed your arm, feeling your soft human flesh against his slender fingers "I love how different from na'vi girls you are. I'm so lucky to have you all to myself tonight."

Your breath was now labored and your pussy was soaked. Your poor panties were all wet.

"I'm dying to squeeze those titties. They look incredibly soft. But I won't do anything that intimate before you say "yes" first, yawntutsyìp."

•

Taglist:

@yeosxxx (u asked to be tagged in all my writings so I'm tagging u here hehe)

Comments are very welcome. I love all of you who take time to read my writings ♡ Thank you all so much from the bottom of my heart. If you wanna be added to the taglist, just leave a comment down below <3

[morgana-larkin]

So I saw a prompt from @meowmeowhissss for anyone who wants it and I really liked it so of course I wrote a fic for it. The prompt is:

Okay, I have a prompt for whoever wants it.

At the end of the school day R walks to the teachers lounge with a bushel of flowers for Melissa. As they turn the corner they see Melissa and Gary say “I love you” and kiss. R looks at the flowers, back at the two lovers, throws the roses into a trash can near by, and kicks the trash can. Just for a little comedy Mr Johnson sees this happens and he tosses his mop onto the floor and stomps away.

OKAY WHAT IF THE FLOWERS HAD A CARD ATTACHED AND AS MEL LEAVES SHE SEES A RANDOM CARD ON THE FLOOR?? SHE PICKS IT UP, READS IT AND IS LIKE “fuck.”

The fic is short and left on an open ending. Title based off of the narnia book: The lion, the witch and the wardrobe. Part of the fic has the scene from when Gary told Melissa he loves her.

Part 2 Alt End

The Vendor, The Teacher and The Roses

Warnings: open ended ending, angst/ no comfort

Words: 913

You race out of the doors at the end of the day to the flower booth that set up across the parking lot. You buy a nice bushel of different coloured roses and run back to the school.

You see Melissa’s car still in the parking lot and smile that she hasn’t left yet. You see Jacob on your way out and ask if he knows where Melissa went and tells you that she and Barb went in the direction of the break room. You walk there while writing a note on a little card that came with the flowers for Melissa.

Once you get to the break room, you hear voices and peek your head to see inside. You see Barb, Melissa and Gary and they’re looking at the vending machine.

“I owe you? I owe you what?” Melissa says confused.

“I love you.” Barb says to clarify.

“Well I love you too Barb but… oh… OH!” Melissa says as she catches on and turns to Gary and puts her arms around his neck. “I love you too.” She tells him and kisses him.

Your eyes widen as it happens and Barb turns around and walks away to give them privacy. You see her and you duck away hoping she didn’t see you. You turn around and walk away, walking by a trash can, you throw the flowers in it and kick it with anger.

Mr Johnson sees it and throws his mop on the floor and walks away with his hands up. “Not today.” He says.

Barb walks out of the break room, she saw you peeking in and turns when she exits the room to see you throw the flowers out and kick the trash over. She sighs and thinks ‘oh boy, this isn’t gonna end well.’ Barb knew to a certain extent the feelings you have for Melissa but she never said anything as it wasn’t any of her business and Melissa’s with Gary. She walks away in the opposite direction praying that tomorrow isn’t a disaster.

You drive home right away and as soon as you close your apartment door, that’s when your feelings catch up to you. Your heart broke when you saw Melissa and Gary declare their love for each other and then kissing. You knew they were dating but didn’t think it was anything serious since she barely talks about it. You feel like an idiot.

Melissa and Gary break apart. “How about I take you out tomorrow night? I know you don’t like going out when it’s a school day the next day.” He tells her and she smiles.

“Ya, I would like that.” She tells him and she leaves while he cleans up the vending machine.

When she walks out she turns to where you left and sees the trash can and the flowers. She picks up the flowers and the trash can. ‘These are really pretty flowers’ she thinks. Why would someone throw them out? She then sees a card and her curiosity peaked. She reads it and she feels her stomach drop.

‘Melissa,

I know that you would never know otherwise but I have been attracted to you since I started here. Your friendship means so much to me but I can’t keep my feelings down any longer. I have a huge crush on you and would love to go on a date with you.

Love,

Y/N

She looks at it and reads it over and over again and thinks of you and how blind she was. Of course you like her, you’re always trying to be close to her, giving her compliments, knowing what to say when she’s having a bad day. “Fuck” She says and she walks out with the flowers and the card.

When Melissa gets in her car she puts the flowers and card on the passenger seat. She puts her b hands over her eyes and groans. She then pulls out and goes to get out of the parking lot but then thinks. She can go left and go to her place or she can go right and go to your place. She doesn’t know which way to go, which direction to go in, the choice is eating away at her.

She knows she has feelings for you too but she’s also with Gary, and the two of them just declared their love for each other. But she also can’t deny that she’s thought about you and what it would be like to be with you. What it would be like if you were the one that waited for her in the break room to declare your love for her instead of Gary. What it would be like if you got to her before she made it to that break room, before Gary declared his feelings for her. She has to make her decision and she knows she has to make it right now. Whoever she chooses, she could lose the other.

She knows if she goes left to her place then that means she’s choosing Gary, and if she goes right that means she’s choosing you.

She then takes a few deep breaths and closes her eyes. She thinks about it for a good minute, weighing the pros and cons, she then turns her brain off and lets her heart decide. Then she opens her eyes again when she made her decision. She flicks the stick to put on her turn signal and turns.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta

@imaginesmultifandoms

@idonothingalldays-blog

@sexysapphicshopowner

@dvrkhcld

@lilfartbox1

@ricejucie

Let me know if you want to be added!

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

My memory is terrible so I wanted to do a breakdown of my stuff every once in a while. Might be monthly, might be whenever I feel like it. And also. Spoilers and opinions below, read at your own risk.

QL - Currently Watching

🇯🇵I Hear the Sunspot [1/12] - I'm so grateful that I get a new jbl just as I'm mourning the end of the last one. I didn't read this manga but I've watched the film, and I really liked it even if it felt unfinished. Hopefully with 12 episodes it means we get the full story. This was a very good first episode, I feel like we established the main relationships dynamics and got a good insight into the main characters core. Taichi is my new child.

🇹🇭 Knock Knock, Boys! [6/12] - I continue to enjoy this group. Jane turned out to be a great addition instead of what I feared, but Peak really needs to step up so I can keep rooting for him and Thanwa, cause I'm also not a huge fan of the ex coming back as an obstacle for the couple. Latte and Almond are really great together and I'm curious how Almond will deal with his feelings for Latte, when he actually realizes he's having them.

🇹🇭Love Sea [4/12] - Before anything else, I love the ocean and I love when shows get out of the city. Also I like Mut. Now. I'm not a Mame hater. I'm a 'trauma is the only way to write deep characters' hater. I'm also a 'trauma gives you an excuse to be an asshole' hater. But most of all, I'm very much a 'love will fix you' hater. So just don't give me 3 out of 3 and it's fine. Also this last episode, all the talk about money and contracts made me feel some kind of way, although it doesn't seem to bother Mut so... And as much I like having Aya on my screen, Mook is really testing that line between cute and incredibly annoying. I'm not sure how long I'm staying with this one.

🇹🇭My Love Mix-Up! [4/12] - So... this is not good. The technical aspects of this are actually bad. Considering the number of sponsors is actually kinda incredible that it's so badly put together. The sound, the lighting, the editing, overall just... not good. Now, the rest. Look I don't want to ruin anybody's fun, so I'll keep watching this one quietly, unless something outrageous happens. But for the record, and this is all I'm gonna say, they are ruining the best parts of these characters and this story, and even if I ignore that (which I can't because it's an adaptation), it's pandering and it's a lazy attempt at recapturing the magic of msp, with a worse script and recycled material. Also I cannot believe they didn't put Atom in a trashing bag.

🇹🇭 My Stand-In [1/12] - For a number of reasons I'm waiting to binge this one. I do love watching the gifs on my dash though, pretty is pretty.

🇯🇵Ossan no Pants ga Nandatte Ii Janai ka! [9/11] - It's so good. I love them all. This last episode I was close to tears in several parts but the street proposal ended me. It's definitely one of those shows that I'm grateful that I get to watch even if I can't always find the words to talk about it. These characters have my whole heart. [everyone should be watching this and the wonderful @isaksbestpillow has made that possible with her subs. Here is the post with the latest episode. ]

🇹🇭SunsetxVibes [3/12] - It's ridiculous, it's fun, it's cute. Sun is such a simp. Man basically proposed before they were even dating. And yeah the way it started was not amazing, with the lying, but these two actually communicate about their expectations and what they're feeling which is better than a lot of shows right now. And I adore the sides.

🇹🇭The Rebound [2/12] - Everyone is gay and naked. And they play a sport of some kind.

🇹🇭The Trainee [1/12] - OffGun are back! I really liked the set up for this. It's only the first episode but I really like how they are walking the line between the comedy and the seriousness of the workplace. I love a good friend group so I'm looking forward to seeing how the relationships between all the interns grow. Poon is once again playing the silly brainless child of the pack but I don't care, I adore that kid for some reason. And next week we already got Gun crying so what's not to like?

🇹🇭 Wandee Goodday [10/12] - I already talked about my feelings regarding the last episode. I'm here for Oyei/Cher and Plakao. I love Inn and Great, they deliver with the chemistry but the DeeYak storyline is just a mess for me right now. I am also not looking forward to the inevitable redemption of the terrible parental figure.

🇹🇭 We Are [13/16] - The friendships are still great and mainly why I'm watching. I have a really good time watching those scenes. Only 3 episodes left and ChainPun continue to be the tinniest of crumbs. I don't expect much from this couple at this point and I'm a bit disappointed. FangTan are so cute and such good communicators. They are my favourites. QToey are cute. Now, Phum and Peem. Look PondPhuwin are really good at looking at each other like they're the only person in the universe. However. There's only so many times I can enjoy them staring at each other in slow mo. Once per episode oughta be enough I think. Hopefully now that they're actual boyfriends it gets a little less annoying.

QL - Finished

🇯🇵25 Ji, Akasaka de - What an incredible journey. I have to say it has been a while since a show surprised me this much, for the positive. For most of it I wasn't sure where it was gonna go or how it would end or who would be doing the running. The way they played with the show within a show was so well done. I loved the change in pov, which I always love in jbls, but it not only gave us the opportunity to see how Hayama's crush started but also we were allowed to see behind the mask that Hayama had been keeping up. Speaking of. I love him, one of my favourite characters of the year. And Komagine Kiita did an incredible job. I can't wait to watch him again when Tengu returns. If I had to say, the one thing I wish I had was more of Shirasaki's backstory. I wanted to understand better why his self-esteem got that bad. But that ending was great and honestly, I earned it.

🇵🇭Marahuyo Project - Well that was excellent. This show is beautiful. I want to hug them all and walk next to them. I really don't have the words for it right now so just go watch it. Because these characters are incredible and the visuals are stunning. All episodes here.

🇹🇭 Only Boo! - This is getting tiresome. Here it goes. Why? It was so great. They were the cutest shit and I had a smile on my face the entire episode. Even with the singing. It was wholesome and the mains delightful. And then... Heartbreak, time skip, no consequences, unearned happy ending. I mean Moo is a great character still, and Kang is the best boy, but I'm tired.

Rose Watches OJBL

Mood Indigo (2019) - I liked this one slightly better than the first. I think the visuals are stronger and there are some incredible shots throughout. The sex scenes are some of the best shot that I've ever seen. I love Kijima so even though I'm not always on board with prequels, it was great that we got more insight into him. Obviously we know this relationship was doomed from the start, and Kido has a lot to do with how we find Kijima in the beginning of The Novelist, but I can't help but feel for Kido. He is a mess that is struggling between the expectations that are on him (put there by others but also himself) and the affection and desire he feels for Kijima. And even without watching The Novelist there is always an air that this will not end well. For lack of a better phrase, it just wasn't meant to be. I'm looking forward to watching the rest of this series.

Dangerous Drugs of Sex (2020) - One of my first thoughts when I was watching this was 'we are using the word unhinged too freely'. Cause Ryoji has little competition on that score. This is not an easy watch. I really liked the way it was shot even if at times that meant my view was too narrow so I couldn't look anywhere else but the 'uglier' parts. In completely different ways they were both stuck in an uncomfortable (yeah that's not really the best word but I can't think of another) place and I could feel that throughout. I'm not sure about the ending but they look happy, so what do I know?

Other - Watched

There's a lot airing so I didn't watch much outside ql. I finished Under the Skin and rewatched a couple of things. My watchlist got longer and I have a bunch of shows that I'll hopefully tackle during my summer holiday in July. Speaking of...

There is a lot coming next month, so here is a post with all the shows that have been announced for July that I updated to include Meet You at the Blossom that was recently announced. New jbl starts tomorrow!!!!

As usual my ask box is open for questions or requests. Have a wonderful week💜

[worlds-worst-ships]

Do you ship it? ((C*nt of the month edition) trying not to get banned)

Hi Matt! Since I know comedians these days love googling themselves and finding things about them that piss them off so they can whinge on stage about it, I have something to show you. Here's a list of people in history with disabilities who made more of an impact on the world than you could possibly imagine;

1: Michael Bisping, professional MMA fighter, had multiple fights at the highest level on the trot with an impressive win ratio with a missing eye, unbeknownst to anyone but him (would love to see you make fun of him)

2: Albert Einstein, most famed and celebrated professor of the 20th century, was on the autistic spectrum. Gave more to the world in a year than you did in your life.

3: Tim Burton, among the most famous directors, producers and animators in history, revolutionizing goth culture in his long career, is also autistic. He put in far more work than standing on stage and being a dick.

4: Stephen Hawking. Even an idiot like you knows this one. I'll leave it at that.

5: Hellen Keller, was literally deaf and blind for most of her life and was still a famous author. So whats your excuse for writing such shit, tasteless jokes?

6: Zack Gottsagen, an actor with down syndrome, became the first actor with down syndrome to present an Oscar.

7: Stevie Wonder. I imagine even he could see how utterly insufferable modern comedians are.

Nooooow then, lemme guess, "yOu'Re jUsT a PiSsEd oFf TrAnS pErSoN gEtTiNg OFfEnDeD" lemme tell everyone something about myself.

I'm not trans.

I'm straight.

I have no physical disabilities whatsoever.

I actually don't get along with a lot of lgbt people because they're, guess what, PEOPLE, very few of whom I get along with anyway. Its never once been to do with their identities or rights, but purely because, as is the case with every demographic, most of the ones I've met are pricks.

"BuT ThEy GEt OFfEnDeD-" yes, when you deliberately scroll twitter looking for offended lgbt people, you tend to stumble across them. Wouldn't ya know it?

Anyways. Comedy is dog shit. Getting up on stage and deliberately being edgy because you've lived no sort of life away from people who you know you'll offend is not talent. Its something a 14 year old with an inferiority complex would do. Thanks for being another nail in the coffin of actual, watchable comedy.

Oh yeah, and if you want an example on how to actually joke about domestic violence, cross-reference the name "Wilbur" on my blog. See, its funny when you're making fun of the abuser and the fact that they do these things, but not when you mock a victim and make fun of them for having these things happen to them. Never once do I mention his victims, its purely making fun of him and the sheer absurdity of his behavior in the scope of who he is. And we're on Tumblr, literally the symbol of people getting offended, and never once have I gotten backlash for those jokes, so you, as a man with a Netflix special, have no excuse for such lacking creativity.

One last thing, for my readers... anyone wanna bet some petty cash that a woman or three from his past are gonna come out with a few tasty bits of drama about ol' Matty boy, if you know what I mean?

[cosmiiqueer]

replaying mcsm!

i havent touched this game in about 3 years and now im going back through it because i have terrible terrible brainrot

ep 1

-i still had the opening narration memorized oh my god

-THE OLD MINECRAFT TEXTURES DISTRACTED ME SO MUCH absdfkhsh i kept being like :0 old cobblestone texture! when i was supposed to be making choices

-the original oots are all so goofy

-REUBEN, ,, ,, gently holds. baby. protect baby at all costs.

-petra and lukas and their whole thing still make me so insane

-the animation has some really nice little details that i don't remember ever paying attention to before, like jesse's wooden sword breaking in half before poofing. it's a nice blend of minecraft logic and irl logic i think.

-also girl i KNOW you have the materials for a stone sword! you cannot convince me that wooden sword is your best option

-i played mcsm on a tablet in ye olde days, and even though i have played it on a computer before, im not fucking good at it !!! kept almost missing or fully missing arrows and embarrassing myself lmao

-i forgot how unnecessarily STACKED the va cast is like. matt mercer how did you get here

-i love ivor i love ivor so much he is so dramatic

-"ashley johnson sounds like she's trying really hard to sound cool" -my partner. ohhhh he's right. she does.

-i don't actually ship jesstra (kind of over shipping in general) but jesse having a huge dumbass crush on petra is a headcanon i still enjoy. she's silly.

-yes i always play as fem jesse i simply cannot handle oswald's voice for long stretches of time

-I LOVE THE MUSIC SO MUCH, ,, I REALLY MISSED IT. it's so GOOD. i love how many characters and things have their distinct themes, i love how it sounds similar to minecraft music, i'm just literally obsessed with it. ep 1 alone doesn't really have tracks that i go specifically insane over (thats more in s2) but boy does it have some iconic ones. like look me in the eyes and tell me ivor's theme isn't iconic. you can't.

-like i forgot how melancholic the order's temple track is?? that one gave me the most intense 'im still fourteen playing this game for the first time' feeling that i really wasn't expecting

-who in the ocelots had the legit redstone knowledge to make a working rainbow beacon. which one. i need to know.

-truly love the moment of lukas being like "if you're cool with petra, you're cool with us :D" while the other three are standing behind him, VISIBLY not cool with you. peak comedy.

-axel and olivia are the funniest bitches here. some of the jokes fall pretty flat but they definitely have the most lines that do make me laugh

-lukas and axel are such highschool mean girls to each other. calm down.

-heading to Boomtown because i literally don't remember a thing about it lmao

-i still love this game a lot. i stopped hyperfixating on it around 2019-2020, and replaying it back in 2021 didn't rekindle the intense interest i used to have in it. but god, i missed it a lot. i think it's really fun to rediscover something you used to love so much and i'm looking forward to continuing when i have time

[brothebro]

Any dp/dc fic recs?

of course! Honestly, i love so many of them and I'll try to include as many as i can in my list here! The Undead Lockpicking series by Milaley: In which Danny has a lockpicking youtube channel and he lockpicks the Watchtower. Hilarious, excellent 10/10

The Bat Trap by Threee: Honestly a good ol twin switcheroo with many funny moments but also a lot of delicious angst! (a Damian & Danny twins au) Just, chef's kiss!

GLXY:PSSNGR by socraticat: Danny takes the place of his alternate universe self who lives with vlad in Gotham after vlad killed his parents. Muchas angst, lots of worldbuilding and fantastic action!

A second life by Die_Erlkonigin6083:Kid Danny who has memories from a past life and currently is Dick Grayson's clone baby (and a bunch of others but mostly Dick's) Adorable 100/10 recommend>

lex luthor's ascent from supervillainy to fatherhood by halfagone (milkywxy): Epic. Dad!Lex and and dimensional travel son!Danny. Sweet and super well-executed Cass/Danny. 10/10 i need to catch up with the latest chappies but it's so freaking good I am aaaaaa

Rooftop Express by EmeraldsAndAmethyst: Danny/Jason. Awesome af. Crime lord Jason ftw! Danny is a (supernatural)delivery boy and professional enigma in Gotham

Our Empty Graves by suomifae: Hazmat Suit, no one knows au! Danny/Jason in which Danny finds himself helping out in Jason's gang. Very cool story building, ideas and execution. Im literally screaming in every chapter. so so good!

bloodlines by halfagone (milkywxy): Danny is Diana's and Bruce's son. He of course doesn't know that. There's a prophesy involved that says Danny will end the world, Diana finds out accidentally about it and finds out she has a son (memory wipe shenanigans) and GOSH. There's so much awesome stuff happening and it's a pleasure to see them piece together the facts. 10/10 Diana rocks

Summons by DizzlyPuzzled: Ghost king Danny in which because he's underage his father gets summoned in his stead. Bruce would very much like to know why he keeps getting yote through summoning circles. Just the right amount of funny, family fluff and angst.

If You Give a Bat a Burger by Cielle_Noire: BOI I HAVE NO WORDS. the plot in this is thiccc and juicy and delicious and the mystery is the cherry on top! Danny lives in Gotham, does some ghostly sigil stuff around to protect Gothamites from bad ghosts, it backfires, we don't know why. Red duck candles are involved. The Batkids are chaos. and im here eating popcorn because it's all super entertaining to watch unfold. 100/10 jessica's duck candle

Friendly neighborhood vigilante by Elizabehta_Beilschmidt: Jazz/Jason THE FIC. honestly one of the best Anger Management fics i've ever read. Love the way Communication between partners is portrayed here and how they overcome the hurdles despite the shitshow that is both their lives (affectionate). 10/10 would read again

Danny Fenton: Dead and Loving It by HyperKid: You need an ao3 account for this one, go go go go make one because it's super worth it! Jason/Danny. They meet at the graveyard, your honour! They actively mess with Bruce and the rest of the Batkids! Gala Shenanigans! What else can i say? Go read!

Worm Off the String by TourettesDog: I am licherally dying of laughter. Peak comedy. Danny/Tim ft little baby man Danny who Tim thinks is Danny's weird af pet. Honestly, so GOOD. 100/10 comedy gold.

Press Heart to Subscribe by Die_Erlkonigin6083: A Danny/Damian fic in which Danny is a streamer and Damian watches his stream. Super cute, well executed, 100/10 sweetness scale

Imprint by Hashtag_DriveBy: Babes i dunno what to tell you. I've done fanart of this fic. De-aged baby Danny and DadHood. Human-ish Fright Knight and Excellent friend Roy. Guys seriously. SO SO SO SO GOOD. 100/10 I wanna see the kid reveal to the batfam and am vibrating out of existence imagining scenarios. - There are more but I can't possibly list them all in one go, I'll make another fic rec list later 💙

[evelili]

I just finished your Magnum Opus, and it was super great. I especially loved the Pinkie chapter (which surprised me because she’s my least favorite character!). Anyway, do you have any mlp fic recommendations?

oh boy do i have a list for you, strap in!

if you read my magnum opus writeup, you may have seen i mentioned three authors that dragged me back into mlp. if you're interested in sciset (and what's probably the most popular eqg fic on the entire site), Long Road to Friendship by Albi is a longfic that started after the first eqg movie and is a rlly lighthearted read. i don't normally care for OCs but gosh if i dont accept Albi's version of trixie's parents as canon in my heart haha. if you're interested in pony adventure fic, i also rlly liked Sunset of Time, another rlly well done longfic ive carried in my brain since i first read it xd

the second author, Monochromatic, aka the raritwi authority aka someone who has a GREAT taste in editors, has written three of the most formative longfic ive ever read: The Enchanted Library, its sequel The Enchanted Kingdom, and Crimson Lips which i unfortunately can no longer link since she's taken it down, but i believe you can still buy physically through PFP if you wanted to take a gamble on it (it would be a very good gamble). apart from her longfic though i also adore some of her shorter works, including but not limited to The Choices We Make, a really interesting Pinkie study that's definitely shaped how i view her, Your Own Worst Enemy, which is just. peak rarity content, and Injuring Eternity, which while being one of her older works still has certain passages that wreck me emotionally on sight.

and the third author responsible for my magnum opus is the one and only Aragon, who i can not only recommend for his fics but ALSO for his blog posts and comics (see the comic index on his profile for links to all of them, as well as this amazing blogpost about his neighbour that is just peak comedy). he's also the writer responsible for the banger longfic Crime and Funishment which absolutely defined my writing aspirations for a few years and is the definition of comedy if you looked it up in my heart, as well as In Hindsight, yet another banger rarity fic, and Love Is In Doom which is just bloody, silly, stupid fun (and has sunset shimmer in it)

and then if we want to talk fics i love written by other authors, Sleepless Knights by r5h has my favourite brand of scitwi written right into the margins, Administrative Angel by horizon has one of the most amazing endings to an opening chapter ive ever read AND an amazing celestia, The Best Night Ever by Capn_Chryssalid is a fandom classic with a groundhog day twist on the gala episode from s1, Side by Side by Krickis is a feel-good rarijack oneshot w a focus on lgbt (specifically trans) themes, Wax Earplugs by Reedhoarse has a dysfunctional mess of an adagio dazzle that i adore, Merge Request by FanOfMostEverything has all the scitwi/midnight shenanigans you could ask for wrapped up in the relatable content of github hell, Guppy Love by PaulAsaran is a rarijack longfic with an incredibly realistic setting and an interpretation of mermaids that i love so much, Doused Flame by heartlessons has me handshaking on the "sopping wet pathetic relatable guy" flash sentry interpretation that won me over recently, 80 Days 'Til the World's Farthest Shore by Cynewulf feels like reading a professionally published short story (and i mean that in the best of ways, it's enthralling), and finally if you'll allow me to be self-centred a bit i also am very proud of my two oneshots Heartstrings and Something About Midnights if you wanted to check em out too xd

oops long post!! im not sorry for it, i hope you can find something in here that catches your fancy (or even all of it haha), there's soooo many incredible fics in the fandom it floors me every day that i can read all these incredible works for free!!!

[sortasirius]

"Ghost of a Second Chance" and the Haunting of Eddie Diaz

Okay I finally have some semblance of cohesive thoughts on this episode, so here goes.

Long ass post below:

First of all, the stalker/kidnapping situation was, in fact, harrowing. 911 always knows how to pull off a good twist, I had no inkling that she HADN'T been kidnapped by her husband until Athena figured it out.

The theme of this whole post is, essentially, that I love the way 911 handles past trauma. It's messy and difficult and often not a linear path to healing. We see that with Maddie and with Eddie in this episode in particular, with foreshadowing for Bobby as well.

Sorry I just love seeing them work a call, like these are my emotional support firefighters <3

I'm also loving this arc with Hen and Karen, they're such good parents and are fighting so hard for Mara. And to have Denny be the one she talks to first? To have him be the one that she opens up to? They've raised him so so so well.

Chris is the best and I love him.

And so...Eddie.

"Not too late. We can turn around and leave her now."

Yeah alright, throwaway line meant to be a joke. Sure. But we really don't know Marisol like that. We haven't spent enough time with her to know that he doesn't actually feel this way. Hell, the last time we had a scene with her he was asking her to move out and grinning from ear to ear when she agreed. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to understand that...he's just not that into her.

And here we are, with Chris and Marisol walking ahead of him, and Eddie looking into a store to see Shannon's literal doppleganger folding some shirts.

Immediately, we get scenes of them together. Laughing, kissing, looking at one another, but there are a few things that I find interesting here, first and foremost how these shots are colored.

They're washed out, not fully black and white, but sort of greyscale. I saw someone else talk about how they're colored this way because Eddie doesn't remember them clearly anymore, and I have latched onto this, it makes perfect sense.

I do think part of him is terrified of losing these memories, clinging to them in a way, and seeing this woman in the store sort of brought them all to the surface, giving him something to almost cling to.

"You okay? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Yeah haha, just saw the double of my dead wife in the store, no biggie.

I have to laugh.

When Maddie realizes that Catherine never told her that she was with her husband, you can really tell that this call is dragging up a lot for her, which goes back to my point on how well this show portrays non-linear healing. Even though she left Doug in the woods and moved on with her life, even though she has Jee and fought her PPD and won, even though she's married to Chimney, a part of her will always look over her shoulder expecting to see him there. She's come such a long way, but trauma like that doesn't just go away, it's something that she'll battle forever.

I'm also loving the look into the broken foster system for Hen and Karen. They want to do right by Mara, but how can they when they're not given all the information, when they weren't told about Tyson because Deirdre wasn't allowed to tell them?

I loved Amir's scene with Maddie and I'm DEPRESSED that he's going to try and kill the love of my life Bobby.

Eddie just LURKING outside this store to see mirror Shannon...boy...

Sorry but the "do you trust me?" YOU'RE SELLING HIM A CANDLE GIRL HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU.

"Well then you have no reason not to trust me." Spoken like a true serial killer lmfao.

Unfortunately Eddie Diaz is in the depths of delusion and this corny line worked on him.

You have to admit it is so fucking funny that he's on the brink of cheating with a sales associate trying to sell him an ugly ass keychain who looks like his dead wife who asked him for a divorce approximately 37 seconds before she died. Like that is peak comedy and I won't pretend otherwise.

"It's me, your husband?" Chim I know you say this to Maddie 400 times a day and I love you for it.

"Tell me about the woman in the passenger seat of that car."

He's so open with her, so unafraid to see her as she is, the good and the scary, and he loves her anyway, just as she loves him. Sorry I'm just emo about them.

I genuinely could not tell the difference between blonde Shannon and bangs Shannon. I had a meltdown through that entire scene thinking that he was fucking Kim. But it's fine because he was just fantasizing about fucking his dead wife while carrying a conversation with his girlfriend.

Eddie Diaz let me study you.

I find this idea so fascinating, the way he’s clearly looking at their relationship with rose colored glasses, how he remembers the positives only, not the fights, not the arguments, not the fact that he ran away from her twice when he enlisted in the army. He only remembers the good sex, the smiles, the laughter, even though that was a tiny part of their relationship, nearly negligible at times.

This isn’t the first time Eddie’s done this either, he’s talked before about how their relationship was “magic” when it definitely wasn’t.

Overall, I find this a really interesting look into grief, into how we remember the best parts of people we loved, how we can be so willing to forget the things that didn’t work, the anger and the fights.

Eddie has never really dealt with Shannon's death, he’s pushed it to the side for Chris, keeps going even when he feels like he’s going to break apart. And now it seems like it's finally caught up with him, like meeting Kim tore it all open again, and he's haunted by Shannon again, by his guilt for how it ended and what he wished he had done differently.

OBSESSED with Buck tackling this guy like yes himbo king use those football skills.

AND Dad reflexes Chim I truly am living.

I feel like Vincent has no idea that she brought Tyson to see Mara, and I feel like that will come back into play later.

Domestic Buddie and Chris scene <3

Look not to be a total shill for Buddie (who am I kidding we all know what I am) but there's something so...weirdly intimate about Eddie just knowing their pizza order. And it's their order, not just Buck's, like Eddie would be joining them if he wasn't meeting "Marisol."

They are seriously family shaped and I love them.

Jee and Chim and Maddie GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

Now, for the elephant in the room: Kim and Eddie going on a date behind Marisol (and Buck’s) back. Look, I know I’m in the vast, vast minority here, but I don’t hate a cheating arc in fiction. It happens in life, more often than most people want to think about, and it makes for an interesting storyline. But at this point, Eddie hasn’t really cheated (even thought I was CONVINCED he had with that flashback lmao). He’s toeing a dangerous line, yeah, but having dinner with Kim isn’t inherently cheating, even though he is lying to Buck and his real actual girlfriend.

It’s fascinating to see him be okay with this but his “catholic guilt” stands in the way of him having sex with his girlfriend because she was a nun once. I think him seeing Kim like this really hammers home the point that he doesn’t even really like Marisol. He’s certainly not committed to her in any meaningful way, or he wouldn’t be entertaining Kim.

And let’s not forget, he’s lying to Kim too! He told her he was single and he’s not!

Kim isn’t Shannon, she will never be able to fill that void that Eddie is still desperately searching to fill, because no one can fill that void, not even Shannon.

The theme of the episode is, in its way, stalking. The overall plotline of Kyle stalking and kidnapping women, Eddie sort of following Kim around, even Karen making that offhanded comment that she felt like a stalker. But it feels like Eddie's guilt and unprocessed grief over his relationship with Shannon is stalking him in a way. He believes that their relationship was perfect, that if he could just find the right woman, everything would be fixed, he wouldn't have to grieve her anymore. But that's just not how things work, and I don't believe that there is any woman, not even Shannon herself, that could fit on the pedestal that Eddie has created for her.

The way that Shannon has kind of haunted Eddie's narrative from the moment she died, how she looms over every relationship he has... he's always chasing her memory, but not her true memory, he's chasing the memory that he's creating for himself. The beautiful one where they never fought, he never ran, she never left. But that memory doesn't exist, and it never has.

Eddie is looking for something that he’ll never be able to find. He’s looking for a woman that can be the mother that Shannon was to Chris, but with a partnership that doesn’t make him want to run away…or panic…or cheat.

Where is he going to find that? I think we all know he’s already found it, just not with a woman.

I’ll be so interested to see what this turns into. I love the idea that Buck or one of the others meets Kim and she looks nothing like Shannon to them, because it would be so unsettling for everyone to basically be like “what are you seeing in this random woman that makes you think of your dead wife?” What’s the fallout going to be? Eddie is obviously not well, he’s spiraling and will likely hide it from everyone, just like he tried to hide his struggles with PTSD from everyone as well.

He’s such a fascinating character, and I think the way the writers are bringing up this catholic guilt storyline now could be really compelling if it leads to a larger realization. Marisol is a red herring, we don’t even care enough about her to learn her last name, but she’s a catalyst for Eddie’s guilt at being with someone that brings up his feelings about religion, about what’s “right” and “wrong." And I feel like this could lead to a larger realization.

Maybe even about the man who is more of his partner and parent to his son than any of his girlfriends have been.

[cerealforkart]

I made myself these little dress up dolls because everyone’s getting changed all the time, here’s the first batch, outfits pre-episode 13

Design notes under the cut

[part 2] [part 3]

Lincoln

* I would first of all like to thank Lincoln for being shaped like a model (long boy) and thus very easy to dress up

* I forgot that Link needed to tear off his sleeves to make Normal a diaper in lesson 14, so in lesson 11 he grabs a sweater when I assume he goes home between escaping the FBI and returning to school

* Lincoln is so comically tall the Teeny costume (which I just moved from Normal to Link and edited to match Link’s pose) only reaches his knees. It actually looked so stupid that I had to edit it to make the Teeny costume slightly longer in the legs

* Link has two roombas in his room, he’s a clean boy, he isn’t walking around Taylor’s house in his bare feet, he doesn’t trust like that, it’s sock time

Scary

* I actually originally planned for Scary to have more piercings, but I forgot to add them in lesson 1. Let’s just say her mom won’t let her go crazy on the piercings, from what we’ve heard in rad facts (wouldn’t let her get a tongue piercing or learn guitar) that sounds in character

* I wanted to do the Shit Garden logo on Scary’s shirt like one of those metal bands that only people who like metal can actually read, but I only have so much time and patience

* I want so badly to play with Scary’s hair more, but I haven’t really had the chance, I hope there will be more excuses to give her different styles in the future, I like the braided bun for fancy occasions a lot

* Big T-shirt and shorts are peak pyjamas, love it for her. Also, you don’t need to know how long I spent trying to come up with something for her shirt to say

Normal

* Don’t tell anyone but I kind of miss drawing Teeny’s big stupid head every day, it was easy comedy

* I did actually draw a Jimmy Buffet design on the shirt before scribbling over it, you can barely see if you look closely

* I don’t actually have anything to say about Normal’s dance outfit so I guess I’ll just take this opportunity to talk about my Normal design in general. He was the one it took me the longest to land on and I’m still unsure if I’m happy with him, I want his hair to be long enough to just sorta hang and be greasy, but not so long that it will get in his face too much and I still consistently fail on it

* Not much to say about his sleepover fit either. Froggy :)

Taylor

* I had originally planned for everyone to be wearing their bracelets on their left wrists but in episode 8 it’s mentioned that Taylor is wearing his on his right, at that point I think I had only drawn Taylor’s bracelet once so it was easier to just change his and let him be a special boy (also, they keep the bracelets on post-FBI because Taylor never really has an opportunity to take it off and the others wear theirs in solidarity)

*After Lesson 10, Taylor swaps out the crest of friendship from Digimon to wear his dad’s ring of swapping as a necklace, he tends to grab at it when his dad or the topic of betrayal comes up

* I hate Taylor for his dance fit. No longer my favourite son

* Not really a design note but I watched the Sailor Moon dub in three parts on youtube with my little sister huddled around our home computer after school, we’re real OGs

Hermie

* I finally decided to add the Joker makeup to my Hermie design, I found a powdery sorta brush to use for it so now he’s a true clown. Good for him I guess

* You may notice that I’ve tweaked my Hermie design and his colour scheme just a little bit. This is because white Hermie is dead and you know what? Good for him. I also made his hair a little wavier for Scam, you’ll start seeing the updated Hermie design (as if you can tell there’s a difference other than the very slight change in hairstyle) in lesson 16, because I drew the lesson 15 pages before episode 23 came out and I wasn’t going to go back and change them

* Stupid Joker tie. Hate it

* No sleepover fit for Hermie. Tragic. They need to have another sleepover and include him

[devilofthepit]

hiii thanks for rbing my horror recs post! sorry it took a while but here's your recs! :)

based on ginger snaps i'd recommend the lure (2015), the witch (2015), the living dead girl (1982), stoker (2013), bones and all (2022) and carrie (1976) about blood thirsty/outcast girls who want to be loved :(

based on saw i'd recommend the collector (2009) & the collection (2012), my little eye (2002), cube (1997) and dread (2009) because they're all about being stuck in a trap/experiment with peak 2000s vibes/editing.

based on the lost boys i'd recommend near dark (1987), fright night (1985) and let the right one in (2008) because they're some of my fav vampire movies and the crow (1994), the craft (1996) and sleepy hollow (1999) for their beautiful goth visuals.

based on american mary i'd recommend may (2002), martyrs (2008) (with caution. i love it but it is Rough), the loved ones (2009) and audition (1999) because they're all disturbing movies about complex female characters.

based on scream i'd recommend urban legend (1998), house of wax (2005), you're next (2011), haunt (2019), totally killer (2023) and the cabin in the woods (2011) because they're all about (masked) killers starring cool female characters.

based on blade i'd recommend abigail (2024), 30 days of night (2007), underworld (2003), planet terror (2007) and the machine girl (2008) which are some of my favourite action horrors, mostly about vampires.

based on american psycho i'd recommend maniac (1980), nightcrawler (2014) (thriller) and funny games (1997) because they're all about insane men on the loose.

based on scary movie i'd recommend the blackening (2022), the final girls (2015), behind the mask: the rise of leslie vernon (2006), shaun of the dead (2004), what we do in the shadows (2014), black sheep (2006), zombeavers (2014) and zombieland (2009) for some parody/meta/self aware horror comedies.

hope there's some you haven't seen yet! :)

THANK YOU SO MUCH :)))) the crow is another one of my favorite movies u have such good taste i can’t wait to watch the ones i haven’t seen!!!

[brsb4hls]

Right, this will probably be one of the most wank-inducing polls ever, but I just gotta do it.

Personal opinion and explanation (kinda) under the cut.

Here it comes:

Why do I ask?

Well, to me it seems pretty clear Jensen seems ok with Misha getting his 15 minutes and acting what was important to him, but does not want to get dragged into it.

He has become more fan positive, but with the occssional foot in mouth and mocking.

I keep seeing takes like 'if Jensen has any say in the revival, Destiel will be fully canon' and I absolutely do not see it this way from what I've witnessed.

Dean is Jensen's most popular character and I feel what Jensen likes most about him apart from emotional depth and the hero thing is that Dean is 'cool' in old people terms. (Jensen is 'old people' kinda compared to some of his fan base).

He f.e. loved the purgatory storyline mostly because he got a rad new jacket and weapons.

He said so himself in an interview.

He wants Dean to be in the spotlight being awesome.

And yes, this will absolutely sound homophobic, but I think that Jensen feels Dean being openly bi would 'ruin' the character for some of his fans.

That doesn't mean Jensen himself is homophobic, he is an actor and interacts positively with queer people, but he has an outdated mindset (most likely due to how he was raised).

I know he played a bisexual character once, but nobody outside of his hartcore fanbase remembers that and he did not act it out on screen. It was all lip service and mostly about Marilyn anyways (talking about 'Blonde' here).

And then it never happened again.

In 'The Boys' he was so painfully straight it almost did not fit the show.

So I simply don't think it would fit his 'portfolio' (he is often type-cast anyways) in his eyes.

Then in 'The Winchesters' Cas wasn't even mentioned. It was all about nostalgia. And Jensen easily could have slipped in a neutral acknowledgement.

So, let me know what you think and why.

Also, no, again, I don't want to imply Jensen's homophobic, he is just socialized in a certain way and has an age where he grew up with 'gay jokes' being peak comedy.

This is all subjective speculation, I do not know that man personally, so I'm aware I have no actual clue like the most of us.

I'm just interested in how people come to completely different conclusions.