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goodlucktai · 30 days

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15. "This is going to hurt, okay?" with leo for your zombie apocalypse au (maybe leo losing his arm??)

dialogue prompts

15. “This is going to hurt, okay?”

When the initial outbreak hit New York City like a bomb, Splinter was adamant that they bunker down in the Hidden City until the world was safe again. One almost-apocalypse was enough for him, thank you. This second one could be someone else’s problem.

Frankly, Donatello could see the merit in that. For those initial frightening forty-eight hours he was all but glued to the TV. A handful of staff and one anchor had remained barricaded in the Channel 6 news room, broadcasting what information they could until the station ultimately went dark like all the others. And what they had to share was grim.

Whistleblowers had been quick to throw CEO Theo Audrey’s pharmaceutical subsidiary under the bus as the catalyst, claiming the corporation was in the business of bioweapons. Whether or not that was true, it gave the world a name for the violently aggressive infected: Auds.

Raphael argued that they had the ability to help people, which meant they had the responsibility to. He was more careful with the word ‘hero’ than he used to be, careful in general with what he said around impressionable little brothers who wanted to live up to whatever idea he had in his head that they should be. But it was obvious to all of them what he thought was the right thing to do.

They had all looked at Leo then, their fearless leader. He was still growing into the role, but he had always been the voice of common sense that kept their heads above water.

Leo didn’t say anything right away, his mind racing ahead as he chased the thread of each argument to its end. He could account for inevitabilities and pitfalls and curveballs as easily as if it was all one big game of chess.

And finally he came to the decision he could live with, and said, “Raph’s right. We have to help who we can. But we’ll be safe, papa.”

That was three months ago. The world is still ending, and no cure is in sight, and Donatello doesn’t want to think about how those without portal magic are surviving when they have no choice but to venture out for food or water or medicine.

Sometimes he thinks Splinter was right. Other times he thinks about all the people who are still alive only because of his brothers’ inherent goodness and he can’t imagine having done anything else.

Today, the portal that brings the patrol team home is orange, not blue. Donnie’s heart is in his throat even before he processes the screaming.

“POPS!” Raph’s voice tears through the lair. He hasn’t sounded that frightened since those seconds before the Technodrome exploded in the sky. “Donnie, April—somebody!”

Donnie bursts out of the tunnel into the terminal that makes up their living room and all the air leaves his lungs at once.

Raph’s hands are bloody, and Mikey is crying, and Leo is writhing in their big brother’s hold. The once-bright yellow hoodie Mikey had been wearing that morning is stained an ugly rust color and pressed hard against Leo’s right arm.

“Shh, hey, it’s okay, we’re home,” Raph murmurs, none of the panic on his face making it into his trembling voice. “Raph’s gotta show Don. This is gonna hurt, okay?” He peels away the hoodie, fighting Leo’s grip on his own arm to do it. Leo chirps in distress, and it’s horrible, and Raph all but trips over himself to soothe, “I know, baby, hold on. Hold on.”

He finally reveals a gruesome, gaping tear in the flesh above Leo’s elbow. The edges are shaped like teeth.

“No,” Donnie says.

“We found a few families trapped in an apartment building. One of them had a little girl and she—” Mikey manages to choke out. “She started crying. It was so loud. The Odds swarmed the level we were on in seconds.”

No, is all he can think. No no no.

What apocalypse? The world is ending right here. The world is in Raph’s arms, bleeding and gasping and dying.

“Move,” Draxum says, as good as appearing out of thin air. Donnie’s situational awareness is apparently nonexistent right now but he still hears it when Splinter dashes into the room a second later, if only because of the wounded sound his father makes.

Draxum places his hands on Leo’s wounded arm just above the bite and they begin to glow. Donnie loses the strength in his legs before he completes the last couple steps between himself and his brothers, so he just crawls the rest of the way. He takes his twin’s hand and pretends there is nothing that could force him to ever let go.

“From what we have seen, the infection turns a new host in a manner of minutes,” Draxum says, expression fierce with focus. “How long did it take you to get him home?”

“Um,” Mikey says, scrambling to grab hold of something other than grief and fear the way he would rifle chaotically through the mess of sticker paper and sketchbooks on his desk for the right color copic or drawing pen. Blinking hard and rubbing away fresh tears on his sleeve, their youngest finds the courage to do anything besides just wail and scream the way they all would like to and says, “It wasn’t right away. My portals aren’t instant like L—like Lee’s are. I have to, um, draw the sigils in my mind the way you taught me.”

“Four minutes,” Raph offers. “And twenty-one seconds,” he adds a beat later. “Raph was counting.”

He leans down and presses his cheek to Leo’s forehead. He isn’t saying goodbye, but he’s holding close just in case. He’s giving Leo something sweet to go out on if he has to go. He’s crying, too, a steady, silent drip.

Splinter strokes Leo’s cheek with the backs of his fingers. Donnie isn’t brave enough to look at him. He can’t look at anyone.

There is no other way for this to end. There isn’t a cure. Any bite or scratch is an instant death sentence. Then Donnie’s twin would become something else, a violent, hungry shell of someone once good and loved, and they would have to deal with that. They would have to see it, the ugly wretchedness of it, and never make peace with it for as long as they lived.

And yet—

“He should have turned by now,” April says from just behind Donnie. Her voice is shaking, and she looks like she wants to collapse where she’s standing, but she still manages to claw something shaped like hope out of the worst moment of their lives. “That’s what you’re saying.”

“That’s what I’m saying. This virus is human in nature—mortal. There is a reason the Hidden City is unaffected. Yokai are creatures of magic. In much the same way I could not catch the flu from you, O’Neil, we cannot be infected by Odds. You Hamato call yourselves mutants, but you are yokai. At least in part.”

“And you wouldn’t have thought to mention something like this sooner?” Splinter hisses, something close to hate in his voice.

“How would you have liked me to test it, Lou?” Draxum bites back.

“Shut up,” April says. “What does that mean, Barry?”

“It means the virus has been isolated at the site of the infection,” Draxum says. “It will not remain that way for long. It will spread, very slowly, and eventually take him. This pain that he is in will not wane until he is gone. We must act before it is too late.”

Donatello’s mind is as quick as Leonardo’s, even though they are constantly racing down different avenues. He understands what Draxum has not yet said. What exactly he’s proposing.

They have to remove the site of the infection.

“I can’t do that,” he blurts, too loud.

“Someone must,” Draxum replies, not pulling any punches. “If you want it to be me, then it will be me.”

“What are you talking about?” Mikey says. “Dee?”

Donnie can’t speak. He presses his forehead to the corner of Leo’s that isn’t crammed fitfully against Raph’s shoulder.

It’s a terrible risk. Amateur amputations are the stuff of nightmares. And it might not even work. There’s no precedent. There’s just a one in a million chance and a family desperate enough to take it.

“Leo,” he whispers. “Hey. Nardo. Please. I can’t just. I need you to—I need you to tell me it’s okay. Lee. I need you to tell me what to do.”

He feels it almost instantly, the click and connect of a mind meld. Leo’s mind flows into Donnie’s as effortlessly as it has every time they’ve done this before, the mischievous wind of his ninpo breezing through Donnie’s lightning storm like the skies they belong to are one and the same.

There isn’t a conversation. Leo’s thoughts are muddled, fever-bright and confused, not at all like the shape they take when the wickedly clever slider is feeling like himself. But Donnie hears him anyway.

He understands just from this instant of togetherness that Leo doesn’t want to leave them. He wants to stay where they are. He would do anything to stay.

Donnie parts from him with a gasp. His siblings watch him avidly, tears streaming down their faces unchecked. Leo looks tiny in Raph’s arms. There’s already so little of him, and now they are going to whittle him down even more.

But the helpless screaming fear is no longer the loudest thing in Donnie’s head. It’s drowned out by the deafening rumble of a storm, that faraway sky that flashes with purple lightning and playful gales of blue. Nothing could be louder than the two of them when they have something to prove.

“You’re not going anywhere,” he says, one hand on his twin’s plastron over the spot where that fearless, unyielding heart beats for them. “Hear me? I’m taking this arm, but I’ll give you back a better one.”

The air goes out of the room as all of his siblings and his father suck in a breath and hold it. Raph’s grip on Leo tightens, as if he needs just one more second in a world where this doesn’t have to happen, where there’s another way.

Then he lifts his mismatched eyes and there’s only trust there when he looks at Donnie. Mikey’s hand grips the wrist of the one Donnie has on Leo. April puts her arm around Mikey.

They’re all here. They’re all going to stay right here.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #hamato donatello #hamato leonardo #disaster twins #hamato raphael #hamato michelangelo #april o'neil #lou jitsu #baron draxum #my writing #prompt #tmnt fic #camsthisky #I FORGOT ABOUT CASEY JR #IM SO SORRY #against the odds au

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theoutcastrogue · 6 days

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"The majority of high-tech patent lawsuits are brought by patent trolls—companies that exist not to provide products or services, but primarily have a business using patents to threaten others’ work. Some politicians are proposing to make that bad situation worse. ...

The Patent Eligibility Restoration Act, S. 2140, (PERA), sponsored by Senators Thom Tillis (R-NC) and Chris Coons (D-DE) would be a huge gift to patent trolls, a few tech firms that aggressively license patents, and patent lawyers. For everyone else, it will be a huge loss. That’s why we’re opposing it, and asking our supporters to speak out as well.

Patent trolling is still a huge, multi-billion dollar problem that’s especially painful for small businesses and everyday internet users. But, in the last decade, we’ve made modest progress placing limits on patent trolling. The Supreme Court’s 2014 decision in Alice v. CLS Bank barred patents that were nothing more than abstract ideas with computer jargon added in. Using the Alice test, federal courts have kicked out a rogue’s gallery of hundreds of the worst patents.

Under Alice’s clear rules, courts threw out ridiculous patents on “matchmaking”, online picture menus, scavenger hunts, and online photo contests. The nation’s top patent court, the Federal Circuit, actually approved a patent on watching an ad online twice before the Alice rules finally made it clear that patents like that cannot be allowed. The patents on “bingo on a computer?” Gone under Alice. Patents on loyalty programs (on a computer)? Gone. Patents on upselling (with a computer)? All gone. ...

PERA’s attempt to roll back progress goes beyond computer technology. For almost 30 years, some biotech and pharmaceutical companies actually applied for, and were granted, patents on naturally occuring human genes. As a consequence, companies were able to monopolize diagnostic tests that relied on naturally occurring genes in order to help predict diseases such as breast cancer, making such testing far more expensive. The ACLU teamed up with doctors to confront this horrific practice, and sued. That lawsuit led to a historic victory in 2013 when the Supreme Court disallowed patents on human genes found in nature.

If PERA passes, it will explicitly overturn that ruling, allowing human genes to be patented once again. ...

“To See Your Own Blood, Your Own Genes”

From the 1980s until the 2013 Myriad decision, the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office granted patents on human genomic sequences. If researchers “isolated” the gene—a necessary part of analysis—they would then get a patent that described isolating, or purified, as a human process, and insist they weren’t getting a patent on the natural world itself.

But this concept of patenting an “isolated” gene was simply a word game, and a distinction without a difference. With the genetic patent in hand, the patent-holder could demand royalty payments from any kind of test or treatment involving that gene. And that’s exactly what Myriad Genetic did when they patented the BRCA1 and BRCA2 gene sequences, which are important indicators for the prevalence of breast or ovarian cancer.

Myriad’s patents significantly increased the cost of those tests to U.S. patients. The company even sent some doctors cease and desist letters, saying the doctors could not perform simple tests on their own patients—even looking at the gene sequences without Myriad’s permission would constitute patent infringement.

This behavior caused pathologists, scientists, and patients to band together with ACLU lawyers and challenge Myriad’s patents. They litigated all the way to the Supreme Court, and won. “A naturally occurring DNA segment is a product of nature and not patent eligible merely because it has been isolated,” the Supreme Court stated in Association for Molecular Pathology v. Myriad Genetics.

A practice like granting and enforcing patents on human genes should truly be left in the dustbin of history. It’s shocking that pro-patent lobbyists have convinced these Senators to introduce legislation seeking to reinstate such patents. Last month, the President of the College of American Pathologists published an op-ed reminding lawmakers and the public about the danger of patenting the human genome, calling gene patents “dangerous to the public welfare.”

As Lisbeth Ceriani, a breast cancer survivor and a plaintiff in the Myriad case said, “It’s a basic human right to see your own blood, your own genes.” "

#information wants to be free #theory #I fought the law

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confused-rat · 7 days

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Btw, for those who don't know how fucked up using thalidomide babies as an insult actually is:

Thalidomide was an anxiety and morning sickness drug in the 1950s that was marketed as safe for pregnant women but actually caused severe deformities (and I mean it when I say severe) in fetuses that resulted in around 10.000 severely disabled children and countless miscarriages. The victims are still fighting to get adequate compensation.

So what lily is using as a haha gotcha insult here is a tragedy caused by severe criminal neglect by pharmaceutical companies, resulting in over ten thousand guilt ridden, traumatized mothers and women who miscarried, and ten thousand children born severely disabled if they were not already killed by a drug marketed as safe.

I'm sorry but if lily has any idea at all what that term means then she is a vile, disgusting person. She has no business using it.

What the fuck.

#lily orchard critical #lily orchard #lily peet #asks

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mallgothyamaguchi · 3 months

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what haikyuu characters would major in at My College™ -secondary characters edition!-

i’m having a lot of fun with this :) i’m kind of just doing main side characters and ones i have a good idea for, but if you have a request, feel free to send a reply or ask!

oikawa - …spanish major with latin american & caribbean studies minor. sue me

iwaizumi - easy easy easy mr. iwaizumi hajime (27) athletic trainer is pre-med track biology major and i stand by that

kenma - easy this kid is computer science to a t, but he also minors in business administration (influence of kuroo)

kuroo - business administration with minors in chemistry (can’t disappoint everyone’s fanon career for him as a chemist) and media & communications (he is a sports promoter after all)

fukunaga - look did i just put him in here to say that he’d be part of one of the many comedy groups on my campus? yes absolutely. theater major.

bokuto - not even furudate knows what he went to college for, so i get to go a little crazy with this one. i like to believe he’s on the education track and majoring in english & creative writing. he’d be everyone’s favorite english teacher in high school.

akaashi - similar path as bokuto major in english & creative writing, with the complementary english literatures major or minor

konoha - hehe public health and chemistry major, looking to get his graduate degree in medical leadership (my pharmaceutical boy) he will also most likely go to pharmacology school post-grad

ushijima - he’s the rare student with only one major and one major only: environmental science.

tendou - hot take, but a chemistry major with a theater minor

semi - he is a musician, so i will give him our music major, but he is also a civil servant (yall ignore that a lot), so i give him political science or political economy & public policy

aone - physical science major with either a project management or supply chain management accelerated program worked in

futakuchi - there’s definitely sustainability studies in there, but interestingly, i’d also add physics

koganegawa - i’d say physical science major as part of the dual degree engineering program, adding in the innovation and entrepreneurship minor

kita - most definitely an environmental science and sustainability studies major with a religion studies minor :) (yes i know he specifically says he doesn’t really believe in the gods, but i can’t help but associate him with religion…) i think he’d also be interested in my college’s abroad trip to japan, which focuses on ecology and religion in japan (i really want to go on this trip…)

osamu - easy. business administration.

atsumu - maybe an interesting take, but i’d say psychology. the amount of psychological warfare he tries to use i think is enough explanation.

that’s all for now! let me know if there are more characters you’d like to know about ! i’m having a lot of fun with this so please send in requests 🙏

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anthurak · 11 months

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Continuing my analysis and theorizing on Asmodeus, Mammon and the rest of the Deadly Sins of Helluva Boss and their backgrounds, characterization and where the show might be taking them, I’ve been thinking about what their expressions of their respective ‘Sins’ might truly represent for their characters. Both in the way they express it and even the whole reason they express a ‘Sin’ in the first place.

Now assuming that all of the Sins are Fallen Angels just like Lucifer, and their presence in Hell is a result of their expulsion from Heaven, and Hell being the new home they’ve built for themselves;

What if their expression of each of their ‘sins’ is a metaphorical or even outright literal trauma coping mechanism?

Like given what we’ve seen so far of how Vivzie and her team approach and interpret the ideas of Hell and Heaven, I think it’s all too easy to imagine them framing the ‘fall’ of the seven sins to be a truly horrific event that left all of them with massive emotional and mental scars and trauma. Like getting kicked out by the universe’s most controlling, rigid, conservative and violently judgmental family.

So what if the whole reason that Asmodeus, Mammon, Beelzebub and the rest started expressing and embodying their respective ‘sin’ was as a way of processing and coping with their trauma?

And of course, there are healthy ways of dealing with trauma, and unhealthy ways as well. Which I think is the true difference between the Sins.

Basically, Ozzie and Bee found healthy ways of processing and coping with their trauma, while Mammon DIDN’T.

More specifically, we see with both Ozzie and Bee that they are able to manage their ‘sin’ (ie; coping mechanism) so that it doesn’t become harmful to themselves or others: Bee is acutely aware of and concerned when someone is overindulging to the point of self-harm, while Ozzie strongly stresses the importance of consent when it comes to sex.

Mammon meanwhile, clearly has zero management or restraint over his ‘sin’. I think it’s all too plausible that Mammon’s obsession with wealth and attention for his ‘brand’ is deep-down a way for him to distract himself from some deeply repressed pain and trauma. Thereby showing how a coping mechanism can become harmful not just for oneself, but others as well.

And the best part is that even with the little we know of them at this point, I think we can already guess that Belphagor, Satan and Leviathan could display/represent other means of coping with trauma, either healthy or harmful.

We know that Belphagor runs Hell’s pharmaceutical business, so I think we can all agree that could easily be a way to show how medication can either help or harm in dealing with trauma. Satan being the Sin of Wrath could represent how anger can be used as a coping mechanism, while he apparently running a workout app could hint to him using fitness as a coping mechanism. And Leviathan being associated with social media of course has all kinds of potential to the show the good and bad ways THAT can be used to deal with trauma.

Over the course of its run thus far, Helluva Boss has shown itself to be in large part a story about dealing with trauma, with practically all of the primary and secondary characters having arcs heavily influenced or even outright defined by their struggles with past trauma. Blitzo, Moxxie, Loona, Stolas, Fizzerolli, Barbie Wire, even more minor or antagonistic characters like Octavia, Verosika and Striker. ALL of these characters have been shown grappling with past pain and trauma, with almost all showing that they are coping with their trauma in either a healthy or unhealthy manner.

Whether Moxxie recognizing that it is his father who is at fault for all the pain he went through and not himself, Fizzerolli finding a loved one who has helped him cope or Barbie Wire simply spending a long time in therapy to show the positive ways people can deal with their trauma. Or conversely, Loona’s closed-off, angry and generally anti-social defense mechanism, Stolas trying to throw himself into a relationship he doesn’t fully understand, or just… EVERYTHING that Blitzo has going on to show the harmful ways people can deal with trauma.

So I’d say it really only makes sense that with how the show has also taken steps to ‘humanize’ the Sins, that this theme of exploring how people deal with deep-seeded pain and trauma would likewise extend to them as well.

#helluva boss #helluva boss analysis #helluva boss theory #mammon #helluva mammon #asmodeus #helluva asmodeus #beelzebub #helluva beelzebub #analyzing the sins of helluva boss #healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms

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atleastpleasetelephone · 3 days

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Nights of Endless Love Part 26

A fic set in Vegas in 1971 at the start of Elvis' first residency that year, where he meets a Vegas showgirl who isn't interested. Smutty, fluffy, angsty drama.

To catch up with the other parts, go here. As always, thanks go to @vintagepresley for the idea in the first place and continued inspo! And many thanks to @eapep for her editing skills!

18 and over only.

Pairing: Elvis + OC - Mia, a Vegas showgirl

Wordcount: 3.3K ish

TW: Drug abuse, health issues, angry!Elvis, a little bit of violence, crying, oral (f receiving), then much fluff.

A/N: This is the final part! I fully sobbed when I finished writing this. It's been a real labour of love and I will miss Mia and Elvis and their little world. Not to say that we might not go back and see how they're doing from time to time, but for now this is the end of their story.

“I’m so tired. Elvis this schedule is impossible.” Mia collapses down onto the sofa, still in her stage outfit. They’re more than half way through the stint in Tahoe, and she only has a two hour break before she’s due back on stage again. Things have got worse since she started going on with him to do a song or two in the middle of his set.

“It’s not impossible. You just need one of these shots,” he looks over to Dr Nick. “Nick, give her a shot.”

Dr Nick moves warily over to Mia. She pulls a face and puts her hand out to stop him. “Dr Nick do not give her a shot. She has autonomy over her own body.”

Elvis is standing over the other side of the room, still in his jumpsuit, sodden with sweat. One of his legs is jiggling about and he's fiddling incessantly with one of his big rings. Two of the tell-tale signs that Nick had been in here giving him a shot before the second show. As if she didn’t know already.

“Well don’t blame me if you can’t hack it.”

Mia stands up, annoyed now. “If I can’t hack it? You’re the one taking enough pharmaceuticals to floor an elephant.”

Dr Nick moves from foot to foot awkwardly. Mia wasn’t often in the room when he was treating Elvis, but he’d already got the impression she wasn’t keen on all of the drugs. He isn’t keen on all of the drugs either, but Elvis will only find someone else if he stops prescribing. He’s never seen them fight before, and he would like to get out before it turns nasty. He knows Elvis has a temper.

Elvis starts moving towards her in that ominous way he has, his lip curling, blowing furious air out of his nose. “I need them. This is none of your damn business woman.”

“None of my business! I’m only living with you and engaged to marry you!”

“Well maybe you need to learn to do as you’re told.” He grabs one of her arms and starts trying to manoeuvre her towards Nick, who is looking quite alarmed by this point. Mia wriggles and tries to get him off her. She sees his other hand coming to grab her and aims a kick at one of his shins. “Ow!” He almost shrieks. She uses the opportunity to pull her arm free and then slaps him across the face for good measure.

“You are not the boss of me!” She screams.

“You come back here,” he hisses as she stands, panting in front of him.

She thinks that she hasn’t actually gone anywhere and he could grab her from here if he really wanted to.

“I’m not having a damn shot, Elvis. I’m sick of seeing you take all this stuff. I’m sick of waking up in the night and checking if you’re still breathing. I’m sick of worrying about you all the time. I want you to rest,” she finds herself faltering, holding back tears. “I love you.”

He closes the gap between them, and for a moment she can’t tell if he’s going to kiss her or hit her. He pushes her the few steps back it takes to hit the wall, and then his mouth is on hers, his tongue pushing insistently into her mouth, his hands grabbing her arms and pressing them against the wall next to her head. Somewhere that sounds like a million miles away she hears the clunk of the door. Nick must’ve finally had enough.

“Baby I love you too,” he says, when he finally comes up for air. “I’m sorry. Let me make it up to you.”

He starts slowly unzipping her catsuit, kissing her newly exposed skin as he goes. He stops briefly to pay her nipples some attention, but it’s clear where he’s headed, as he presses kisses to her stomach and slides the zipper down all of the way to where it finishes between her legs. She gasps when he first licks her clit, firmly and repeatedly, looking down to see him on his knees in front of her, worshipfully. His tongue dips down lower, tasting her properly, his lips and chin slick with her juices. She whines, desperate for more contact.

“Put your leg on my shoulder baby,” he says, the words buzzing against her.

She does, feeling his fingers spreading her cunt so he can better access it, lapping at her, pushing his tongue inside. His thumb moves to rub her clit as he carries on licking, the fingers of his other hand digging into the skin of her thigh and ass. She moans, grabbing her breasts and rubbing her nipples. She’s so turned on even just at the sight of him kneeling in front of her like this, burying his face in her cunt, licking and sucking like his life depends on it.

He moves to suck on her clit now, looking up at her as he does it, his hair soaked with sweat from the show earlier and her arousal all over his face. He slides a finger inside her and curls it slightly, waiting to hear her reaction. She groans, feeling him hit that spot inside of her and wriggling to try and get more contact from his tongue.

“Hold my head Mimi. Do whatever you want with me.”

She shivers at the words. She loves it when he tells her to use him like this.

“Another finger…please,” she just about manages.

He nods and slips a second finger inside her.

She reaches down and takes hold of his head, fingers digging into his damp hair. She starts to roll her hips so that her clit rubs against his tongue, holding onto him gently and then as the pleasure starts to build she finds herself gripping him desperately, pushing her cunt into his face, not really caring anymore if he can breathe. She’s so close now, all she can think of is reaching that high. As her orgasm washes over her she grips his head even more tightly, crying out and feeling tears falling down her cheeks. She shakes and cries, finally letting him go and sliding down the wall, somehow getting her leg off his shoulder and ending up sitting in a little pile at the bottom of it.

“Fuck, honey.” Elvis is beet red, and he’s taking great gasping breaths.

She looks over at him, and realises she might’ve actually been suffocating him. “Oh shit. Are you alright?”

“Honey. You’re crying.”

Mia laughs, even though she’s still crying. “I’m crying, you’re nearly suffocated, this is all going great.”

He moves to try and kiss her and she holds her hands up in front of her face. “Ahh. Wash your face!”

He laughs and grabs her arms, pinning them to her sides. “No,” he replies, kissing her on the mouth. She can feel the slickness of his lips, covered in her juices, and taste herself on his tongue. “If you’re going to smother me the least you can do is kiss me afterwards.”

She laughs, and then he pulls her into his arms, leaning against the wall himself. “Baby why were you crying? I thought you were enjoying yourself.”

“I just felt overwhelmed. I love you so much and I really want this to work, but it’s just fucking exhausting. I’m sorry I nearly killed you.”

He chuckles into her ear. “It’s okay, I asked for it. In more ways than one. And I love it when you’re so uninhibited like that, especially all over my face.”

She squeals. It smells like sex and sweat all around her. They really need to shower before the next show.

He nuzzles her neck. “I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have got mad at you. You’re right, we can’t carry on like this. But I don’t know what else to do.”

***

They somehow finish the Tahoe commitment but tell Jerry and the Colonel that there’s no way they can keep up that level of work. It was what they’d suspected would happen, and although the Colonel has his views on how many shows Elvis and Mia should do, for once he keeps his mouth shut. Jerry has been a good influence on him from that perspective. He’s learning how to diversify, has even thought of taking on one or two more clients. Jerry suggests one show a night is more reasonable, tours could be longer but there would be more gaps between dates and fewer residencies. Mia and Elvis both agree, and leave the meeting somewhat relieved.

Mia knows the amount of shows isn’t the only problem though, and so she decides to broach something with Elvis as she watches him rubbing his belly and grimacing.

“What do you think about checking yourself into a hospital?”

Elvis almost jumps. “What? There’s nothing wrong with me!”

Mia puts her hand on top of his. “You’re not in any pain just now?”

He sighs. “Okay, but… hospital?”

“Please. For me. I’ll stay in there with you. We can order in whatever food you want. But I think you need to go and get checked out, and… maybe you need to come off some of what you’ve been taking.”

She’s very nervous about the last part of the sentence. He’s never taken interference in the drugs he takes very well in the past. She had thought she wouldn’t interfere in that part of his life, but the shows at Tahoe showed her that she had to. She watches his face twist into a variety of different expressions, as if he’s having a not-very-internal battle with himself.

“You’ll stay with me the whole time? Even if they want to do things to me? Look for stuff? You’ll be there? You promise?” He’s starting to sound a little panicked, but it seems like the agreeable Elvis has won this time.

“Yes. I won’t let them throw me out of the room. I’ll be there with you the whole time I promise.”

He takes a deep, shuddering breath. “Okay then.”

***

Mia keeps her word. They check into the hospital together and she’s there holding his hand as they do blood tests, check his blood pressure, put drops in his eyes. When they tell him he needs a colonoscopy he looks at her and she tells him it will be okay and she will hold his hands and talk to him the whole time. He nods like a frightened child but does whatever she says. They slowly take him off the complicated mixture of pharmaceuticals he’s been taking since he was in the army, working out exactly what he needs rather than what he wants. Mia stays up a lot of the nights, lying in the bed with him, stroking his hair and wiping his brow as he sweats and twists and turns uncomfortably in his sleep. With the best will in the world, his withdrawal is still horrible and he begs her to let him take something for it, crying in her arms.

A week after they first got there, he’s sat up in bed as she lays dozing after another tumultuous night.

“Hi there.” A voice Mia can’t quite place, deep and sonorous. She tries to ignore it, but Elvis’ response makes that impossible.

“Lawrence! It’s been so long!”

Elvis is feeling good for the first time since he checked into the hospital, and seeing Larry has made him genuinely excited, dropping the book he was reading and sitting up properly in bed. All of this jostles Mia so much she sits up again with a groan.

“How’re you doing, man?” Larry asks, sitting down on the armchair in the room.

“Great. So much better. They’ve taken me off a lot of things and… I do feel good for a change, Larry. They’re bringing me all these fresh fruits and vegetables and Mia is helping me decide which ones I like.”

He looks over at Mia, whose hair is absolutely everywhere, eyes barely open, looking like she needs to sleep for a week. He strokes her face. “Baby, why don’t you go to the room across the hall and get some proper sleep?”

The hospital staff had reserved them another room in case Mia wanted to sleep somewhere separately sometimes, but she hasn’t left his side for the whole week.

“You sure?” She replies, groggily.

“Of course, Angel. Larry can keep me company for a while and you look like you need to sleep somewhere comfy.”

She nods and shuffles off across the corridor.

“I hear you’re getting married?”

Elvis grins. “Yeah. When the divorce is finalised with Cilla, we certainly are.”

“I’m so pleased for you Elvis. Things really seem to be turning out well lately.”

Elvis is beaming. Things were turning out well. He has an idea to make them even better. “Say, you wanna be my best man?”

Larry is taken aback. They hadn’t been in touch much recently, a hair cut here and there and a few chats, but nothing like the intensity of their relationship previously. He’d been wondering if they were just drifting apart.

“I’d be honoured!”

Elvis reaches across to shake the other man’s hand, firmly. “Wonderful. I’m sure Mia will be pleased too.”

***

Mia had never thought she’d be so nervous on her wedding day. What is there to be nervous about? Fluffing up the words? Tripping over her dress and falling on her face? Actually, both of those seem like pretty bad options. She smooths her dress down and looks at herself in the mirror. Life on the road hasn’t exactly stopped the ageing process. If anything, it’s accelerated it. She had her grey hairs dyed back to brown in readiness for today, there’s a lot of strong elastic holding her not-so-little belly in and a face full of make-up hides her tired eyes and wrinkles. But she finds somehow that she doesn’t mind so much any more. Elvis’ hair is still white and he is completely unapologetic about it. He gets his reading glasses out when he needs to and he ignores the jibes from the guys. They worship one another’s bodies, no matter whether they find wrinkles or extra fat there. Elvis is particularly delighted by the fact that she’s put on a little extra weight on her ass, kissing and kneading it at every opportunity. Every morning he tells her how beautiful she is, or sings Mia In The Morning, no matter how many times she hits him with a pillow and tells him to shut up. The tests at the hospital showed that he has a problem with his intestine that makes his belly swell from time to time, and Mia makes sure to show him how much she loves him whenever it happens. He’s given up trying to push her away when she pushes his shirt up and kisses him all over. In fact, he almost looks forward to it.

Mia smiles at her reflection. It had been one helluva year. When she’d started 1971, performing on that stage in the Tropicana, she had no idea things would turn out like this. That she’d be getting ready to marry one of the most famous men in the world. That she’d be so in love with him.

“You ready?” Amanda asks. Mia had to spend an entire drunken day catching her up on everything that had happened over the past couple of months, but she was the only person she wanted as her maid of honour.

“As I’ll ever be.”

Her dad walks into the room, blinking back tears at how beautiful she looks in her dress.

“Time to go, pumpkin?”

Mia nods and takes his arm. Elvis had encouraged her to get back in contact with her parents, so she’d invited them to the show when they visited her hometown. She was surprised when they came, and even more surprised how proud they were of her. She suspects it has something to do with Elvis, who put on the world’s biggest charm-offensive when he met them, and who of course they loved instantly. Her dad was over the moon when she asked him to give her away at the wedding.

She can feel herself shaking as they walk slowly down the aisle to meet the man standing at the end of it. Elvis is shaking too, he’s asked Larry approximately 15 times already whether he still has the rings, and until he saw her for himself a few moments ago, he had completely convinced himself that Mia wasn’t coming. The walk is interminable for both of them, Elvis sweating and worrying about stuttering his vows and Mia concentrating on not falling over her own dress. When she finally gets there and they turn to face one another, holding each other’s hands tightly, they both let out shaky breaths. And then they realise what they’ve done and both giggle. It’s like the rest of the world completely disappears when they look at one another. Until, that is, the celebrant starts to speak.

“In the presence of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, we have come together to witness the marriage of Elvis and Mia, to pray for God’s blessing on them, to share their joy and to celebrate their love.”

Despite their fears, the ceremony goes smoothly. Larry hands over the rings. No-one declares a reason they can’t get married, and neither of them mess up their vows. Elvis stutters a little but it just makes Mia love him more, if that were possible. They kiss passionately when they’re told they’re now man and wife, and little Lisa-Marie is the first person to start throwing confetti. Mia briefly wonders if it’s odd to have your husband’s ex-wife as one of your bridesmaids, but then decides she doesn’t care. Priscilla is still such a good friend to her, she’d even helped to pick out Mia’s dress.

The party that follows goes on well into the night. It starts with a first dance to actual Jackie Wilson performing (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher, and sometime around midnight Mia finds herself still in her wedding dress, trying to teach Red West how to rumba.

“Never thought you’d last, you know.” He says into her ear as she tries in vain to get him to stop standing on her feet.

“Oh really?” She laughs back, pushing his hip with hers.

“No. Thought he’d have enough of you being so bossy.”

“You should be concentrating or you won’t get any better.”

Red looks up at her. “I’m not really trying to get better, I’m enjoying you manhandling me if I’m honest.”

Mia bursts out laughing, shoving him back and away from her. “I’ll tell my husband you said that.”

“You’ll tell your husband he said, what?”

Elvis is suddenly behind her, his arms around her waist. She leans back against him and smirks. “Red West is trying to get close to me, husband.”

“Oh, is that so, wife?”

“Hmm yes. But I wouldn’t worry about him, I’m not interested.” She spins around in his arms and puts hers around his neck. “I just feel sorry for him.”

Elvis looks up at her and chuckles, humming with pleasure as she leans her forehead down against his. “He is pathetic, you’re right.”

Red rolls his eyes and huffs, wandering off to find someone else to annoy.

“How is my beautiful wife?” Elvis asks her as they sway back and forth to the music.

“I’ve never been better. How is my handsome husband?”

“I’ve never been happier. Today has been perfect. You’re perfect. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“I can’t wait either, lover.”

The band starts playing From A Jack To A King.

From a Jack to a King / From loneliness to a wedding ring / I played an Ace and I won a Queen / And walked away with your heart

***

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xxsabitoxx · 1 year

Text

Merlot 🍷

CEO Shinobu x AFAB! Assistant Reader

Warning: public sex, finger fucking, alcohol consumption, cunnilingus, bathroom sex, squirting, sadistic Shinobu / Dom Shinobu

A/N: a last minute pride fic, since June was a wonky month for me lol. Regardless, we’re queer year round on this blog and I have plenty of WLW ideas. This fic was honestly self indulgent lmfaooo 🥴

Word count: 3.1k

The red wine in your glass creates a bubbling sense of warmth in your body every time you take a sip. Your cheeks feel warm, your legs feel heavy, as if you’d never want to move ever again. You’re only half paying attention to whatever the man before you kms droning on about. Some sort of business proposal for the Kocho Family Pharmaceutical company. You can tell by the way your boss is sitting beside you, she’s not interested at all.

Kocho Shinobu, the youngest daughter of the Kocho family and also the heir to her father’s company. Her older sister, Kanae, respectfully declined her “birth right” and passed the heir title on to a more than willing Shinobu. You swirl your wine glass, bringing the contents to your lips and hoping it will eventually dull the insistent blabbering. You glance sideways at Shinobu, a similar wine glass sits before her on the table, but her hands are resting on her lap, leaving the contents untouched.

You let your eyes wander a bit lower, focusing on her chest. How shameless of you, you nearly chuckle as you pull your eyes away to look at the man once more. He’s not as fun to look at as your boss is, especially when she’s wearing a low cut dress. It was deep purple, just like her eyes, just like the ends of her hair. How the man before the two of you could even focus you weren’t sure, then again you’d rather his eyes not linger on her for more than necessary. Even then, you seemed oblivious to the fact that he was focusing on you more than Shinobu.

To make it even worse, you seemed to be painfully unaware of the growing agitation from the woman beside you.

Delicately, Shinobu moved one of her hands from her lap and placed it on the leather booth below. The gap between your rights was no bigger than six inches, if Shinobu could have it differently, you’d be squished together in the booth. Curse fancy restaurants and their attention to detail. She listened to every word the man uttered, she knew within five minutes of the dinner that she wouldn’t accept his offer. Yet, it’s been an hour and she’s letting him drone on so she can sit beside you, enveloped in the perfume she gifted you.

She glances at you, she can tell you’re completely uninterested in what is being said. Shinobu’s eyes linger, trailing down the column of your neck, ghosting your shoulders and collarbone, dipping even lower to your cleavage wrapped tightly in a satin black cocktail dress. The sight makes her mouth water. She shifts focus, her hand still resting on the leather separating your thighs. She finally reached for her glass, sipping it carefully. She times herself, setting the glass down a little harsher than necessary as she moves to rest her hand on your exposed thigh.

Her plan worked, you jumped a bit as her hand made contact with you, but it was masked as you being scared by the sound of the glass hitting the table. “Oh~ don’t mind me. Continue.” She ignores the way you eye her, cheeks warm from the wine and now from the shock of her hand on you. He shrugs it off, continuing with his blabbering. Shinobu is careful, her fingers tapping idly on the flesh of your thigh. She enjoys the way it bounces slightly under her touch, it’s just as soft as she envisioned it to be, lucky her.

She’s a little less careful as she squeezes your supple flesh, watching your fingers twitch as you grab your wine glass. She’s proud of the fact that you know enough to keep your reactions to a minimum. This wouldn't be the first time she toyed with you during a business meeting, but she intended this to be the farthest she’s ever taken it. Shinobu is the mood to see how far she can go before it’s too much not only for you but for the party that is forced to sit through it. She’d fuck you right here on the table if she could, but there are too many lingering eyes for that.

Your breathing is a little more ragged, the urge to take deep breaths is nearly overwhelming as her hands creep further upwards. Shinobu doesn’t stop once she meets your dress, going as far as to pull your thigh towards her, not stopping until your knee meets her’s. You keep your eyes trained on your wine glass as her perfectly manicured fingers scratch at your inner thigh. She’s teasing you, her fingers merely inches away from your sex but she won’t touch you just yet. “So, what do you think so far?” The direct question didn’t faze Shinobu as much as it did for you.

You swallow, blinking as you force a smile onto your face and look over at your boss. For the first time since sitting down, the two of you made direct eye contact. Shinobu smiles at you, nodding. “I think we’d like to hear more from you.” You’d never guess she wasn’t interested. He seems more confident, going into another spiel about the benefits combining both companies would have. All the while, Shinobu’s fingers are kneading the flesh of your inner thigh. Your brain goes back to autopilot, tuning the man out as Shinobu toys with you.

You’re aching now, an uncomfortable wetness becoming more prominent due to the air reaching your cunt. You feel your arousal, clinging to the fabric of your panties, it’s making you squirm. You feel warm, the sticky sensation making you want to get up and run to the bathroom but Shinobu’s fingers tell you otherwise. She’s using one finger to swipe up your slit, the material pressing further into your sex and collecting more arousal. You reach for your wine glass again, sipping the nearly black looking liquid in hopes of it hiding your struggle.

The last thing you expected was for Shinobu to play with your pussy while you sat in a fancy restaurant for a business proposal.

Then again, you were pretty naive for not expecting it. She continued like that for a while, sliding her finger up and down your covered slit until she could tell your panties were soaked. You set your glass down, fingers clenching as you moved to settle them in your lap. Though it was a bit of a struggle considering Shinobu’s hand was playing between your legs. You knew better than to touch her hand or even try and move it away.

Any sort of movement on your part would immediately bring attention. So you let her do as she pleased, just as you always did.

It was nearly agony, but it seemed Shinobu was feeling generous with you. Two slender fingers dipped under your panties, making contact with your bare heat. You swallowed, throat drying up as you reached for your wine, as if the liquid would do anything to quench your thirst. She continued the same teasing motion, sliding her fingers along your slit until they were slick with your arousal. She ghosted your clit, sliding over the sensitive bud before dipping lower, prodding your entrance.

Your legs fell open just a bit more, allowing her more space to do as she wanted with you. “Sir, could you repeat that last part?” Shinobu smiled sweetly, feigning innocence as she pushed her two fingers knuckle deep into your cunt. You nearly choked, watching the man’s attention shift from you to her and repeat whatever bull shit he had just uttered. Much to Shinobu’s dismay, his eyes returned to you after he repeated his sentence. Her annoyance made itself known in the way she roughly curled her fingers. You take a shaky breath, eyes nearly watering as she rubs against a sensitive part of you. The pleasure is building as she curls her fingers and scissors you open, completely avoiding your clit.

You’re thankful for the ambience in the restaurant, or else you were positive the man sitting across from the two of you would be able to hear the slick squelch of Shinobu’s fingers working you open. It’s embarrassing, to an extent. But the idea of getting caught also has your body reacting to her touch. Shinobu pauses her thrusting, pressing up against various parts of your walls until she finds that one particular spot. She knows she’s found it when your thighs immediately tense. To make matters worse, she takes the time to massage that particular spot. She watched your hands shake as you brought the glass of wine up to your lips again.

Your breath fogs the glass, barely able to let the liquid escape the cup as she forces a soft moan out of you. Your wine glass seems to swallow it whole, though the tiny smirk on her lips tells you she heard it. You put the glass down, the lingering taste of cherry and plum making you feel parched. Slowly, the heel of Shinobu’s palm roughly massaged your throbbing clit. You knew you were a goner the moment she started, the build up in your gut felt like a dam was about to burst. You could feel sweat forming on your brow, suffocated by the environment around you as Shinobu finger fucked you at the dinner table.

“Pardon me, but is your assistant feeling alright, Miss. Kocho?” You barely process what he is saying, rather you’re trying to steady your breathing as Shinobu’s fingers never falter. “Oh! She’s fine, you’ll have to forgive her sir. After one glass of Merlot she gets a bit dazed…” Shinobu glanced at you, jaw clenching slightly when she noticed how far away you looked. Perhaps she was taking it a little too far, she failed to consider the wine you had in your system. “If it’s not too much trouble, do you mind if we run to the ladies room?” Shinobu’s fingers were still thrusting in and out of your cunt as she spoke, the heel of her palm stroking your clit.

“Oh, I see.” He chuckled softly, it sounded almost predatory. “By all means, take your time ladies.” Shinobu forced her smile, pulling her hand away from your cunt entirely. “Thank you so much.” She was motioning you out of the booth, watching as you seemed to recollect yourself pretty quick. You were nearly running to the bathroom by the time Shinobu got out of the booth. The women’s room was dimly lit, just like the rest of the establishment. Luckily the music was much louder than in the restaurant, the stalls were closed off rooms. Nobody would see nor hear you. Perfect.

“Aren’t you risky…” Shinobu purred as she guided you into one of the stalls. “M-me? You just…” you couldn’t even say it, your face warm and body aching. You had been so close to coming and she had stopped, all because that oaf noticed your dazed look. Shinobu rolled her eyes, pushing you up against the tiled wall. “My pretty girlfriend is gaining too much attention…” Shinobu cooed softly, her body flush to yours. “I don’t like it, I’m the only one allowed to look at you that way…” you’re panting, completely engulfed in her. “Girlfriend, huh?” You teased her for the title, but it sent a wave of excitement through you anyways. This was the first time she had called you her girlfriend.

“Yeah, my girlfriend. You’re mine, if you haven’t figured that out already.” She huffs softly, there was the Shinobu you knew and loved. You lean forward, kissing her deeply, your hands roaming to her hips and holding them tightly. Your tongues swirl around each other, the lingering taste of merlot wine was intoxicating. Shinobu busies herself with your dress, pushing it all the way up and revealing the lacy panties she had been feeling rather than seeing. Your hands moved lower, the intentions to do the same thing clawing at your mind. “Ah, Ah.” Shinobu pulled away, cheeks flushed and lips swollen from the kiss. “You can worry about me when we go home, back to my place I mean. We can do whatever you want when we get there.”

She chuckles softly, thumb rubbing circles on your bare hip. “For now, let me have you… I won’t be able to turn that idiot’s proposal down properly if all I can think about is you and your pretty cunt.” You nod, lips finding hers again as she tugs your underwear down to your knees. The kiss doesn’t last nearly as long as you want it to, but you can’t complain as she drops to her knees before you. Your boss…girlfriend?… was about to eat you out in the stall of a fancy restaurant’s bathroom… while a potential client was waiting patiently back at the table. “Fuck…Shinobu are you sure this is…” the words die on your lips as her tongue licks a fat stripe up your inner thigh. “A good idea? Yeah, I’m positive it is.”

She can’t stop now, not when your kiss is lingering on her lips, the taste of your wine sitting on her tongue. She glances up at you one more time before pulling your hips forward. Only your upper back is braced on the tile wall, your hands fidgeting and unsure where to go as Shinobu grips your thighs. Her nails dig into the flesh of your thighs deliciously, violet eyes roaming over your needy cunt. She doesn’t say anything as she moves forward, lips connecting with your sex as her tongue prods your slit open. You whine immediately, chest heaving as your heart races. Shinobu’s tongue focuses on your aching clit, flicking the sensitive nub until you’re mewling. She lets go of one thigh, moving her hand lower.

You’re watching her with blown out pupils, breath catching in your throat as her fingers enter you again. You let yourself trust the music, moaning loudly as she searches for that particular spot again. This time, Shinobu finds it almost immediately. “F-fuck… carefully w-with that…” your voice is weak, especially when she begins massaging that one spot. She hums, sending vibrations through you as she switches from flicking your clit to sucking on it. “S-Ah-Shinobu…” you choke, the build up in your gut has returned tenfold. “I-I’m serious… Nobu… I’m gonna make a mess.” You’re squeezing your eyes shut, embarrassed because you know what’s coming. She didn’t slow, she moved quicker.

Sweet noises tumbled from your lips as your fingers found stability on her shoulders. Your thighs trembled with effort to keep yourself upright, but you were slowly losing that battle. Shinobu’s lips continued to suck on you harshly, her fingers massaging what you assumed was your “g-spot” until it felt like you were about to burst. “S-Shinobu… please… it feels like you’re gonna make me… pee.” You squeal, face warm as you feared what was to come. Shinobu seemed to laugh, vibrating your cunt. She wanted to tell you to just let it happen, that you wouldn't actually pee, but if she stopped, she was positive she’d lose what she’s accomplished so far. She was going to ruin you, here and now.

So, she kept going, pretending not to hear your desperate pleas. You felt tears burn your eyes, pleasure making your body shake as your orgasm was dangled right in front of you. You couldn’t stop it if you wanted to, Shinobu’s relentless pace made it hard to think straight. “S-Shinobu please… I’m gonna cum…” you wailed loudly, not caring if anyone heard you at this point. Again, too occupied to properly respond, she manages to pick up her already brutal pace. You stood no chance, body convulsing as you came. You’re gasping for air, legs nearly giving out as you blink away the spots in your vision. You had barely processed the shining puddle below you.

“O-oh fuck did I…” you’re still breathing heavy, embarrassment flooding you cheeks. Shinobu pulls away from you, her lips and chin shining with your arousal. She smiles, looking smug as she brings her fingers to her lips and sucks your arousal off of them. “You didn’t pee. You squirted.” Her tone dripped with sarcasm as she uttered the word. Somehow, you felt more embarrassed about squirting. “Don’t look so scared, it’s pretty fucking hot.” She smiles down at the mess you made, some of it is still leaking down your thighs. “If I was in the mood to be nice, I’d bring you out to the car and have you wait while I turn that idiot’s proposal down…”

Shinobu moved closer, managing to avoid the mess on the floor as her body pressed flush against yours. “But I’m not in the mood to be nice…” her tone was seductive, you’d even go as far as to say it was sadistic. “I want to see you squirm, pretty girl.” Her dainty fingers reached down to tug your panties up, watching as flinch when the cold material met your heat. “You can survive a little more, right? Listen to him drone on and on while you sit in your arousal slick panties? Your pussy aching and leaking…” you swallowed, her unfiltered language had you feeling hot all over. “C’mon, use your words, pretty girl.” You blinked.

“Y-yeah…” she shook her head at your weak response. “Now, that’s no way to talk to me…” she fixed you with a stern glare, her lips hovering over yours. “Y-yes ma’am, I’ll be good and wait.” You choked out, head moving forward on its own to try and close the distance. Shinobu smiled, one that was genuine. “Good girl.” She purred softly before closing the distance for you, her teeth sinking into your lower lip so you were forced to open them. You gasped, tasting your own arousal on her tongue mixed with wine, your hand cupping her cheeks to keep her from moving away. It was your longest kiss yet, perhaps your sloppiest too. Shinobu pulled away for air a moment later.

“Now, save the rest for later. We have a long winded proposal to turn down.” She smirked, tugging your dress down and taking your hand. “Shouldn’t we…clean that…” you look down at the mess then back at Shinobu. She shook her head “don’t worry about it.” You had a funny feeling she liked seeing how embarrassing it made you, but then again, you couldn’t be mad at her for it. “Whatever you say, Miss Kocho.” Her grip on your hand tightens, eyes narrowing as she looks at you. “Call me that again and we may never leave this bathroom.” It wasn’t a threat, rather, it was a challenge. “Miss Kocho…” it was your turn to purr, smiling smugly as she shut her eyes and inhaled deeply.

“You’ll be the death of me.”

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im-totally-not-an-alien-2 · 2 years

Text

Halloween prompts no. 14

Danny gets thrown into the Blue Exorcist universe, saw how Rin was being treated and straight up kidnapped him when no one was looking and took him to another dimension/reality/whatever to keep him safe.

Rin, as you can imagine, doesn't take kindly to being kidnapped and tries to roast Phantom. The fact neither understands the others language did not help. Danny, taking a gamble, dropped his phantom form and raised his hands in surrender.

Rinse eyebrow twitched and he asked wtf he thought he was doing. Danny got an idea and raised a finger ask if asking one moment please before bringing out his phone and typing into Google Translate.

Things go better after that, Rins still kinda mad and demanded to be taken home but Danny refused, saying he wasn't going to send him back to a place that would treat him like that! The fight escalated until Danny confessed he died because people ignored the abuse and neglect from his home situation and he terrified Rin will face a similar fate. This finally took the wind out of Rins sails. Rin comforts Danny who may or may not be crying.

This is when the local heros show up because it turns out they landed in the dc universe. They realize they've pretty much melted part of the city they were in during thier fight and scram before anyone can get a good look at them. They're branded as mysterious villains almost immediately.

Danny and Rin take to stealing in order to survive and start teaching eachother thier language so they don't have to keep relying of the translation app. (Also they can't reliably recharge the phone) They're bonding and building up eachothers self esteem. Rin enjoys having someone who let's him protect them as a big brother should and Danny enjoys feeling safe and protected for once in his afterlife. They both start wearing masks and start stealing bigger marks as supervillians in order to survive.

The Justice League Dark is absolutely freaking out because why is a Gahena demon and some kind of Lazarus Pit child working together?? Demons from Gahena never come here cause they shouldn't even be able to and they had no idea Pit People even existed up until now. And why are they stealing such strange things? The bank robberies they understood but the baby food incident? (They stole a bunch of baby food to help the homeless and low income population) The lab thiefts? (Danny recognized the type of machine they were making was designed to be a portal when the press conference about it said nothing about portals. So he stole it and destroyed it cause it was sus.) The JLD knew they were missing something.

Batman himself eventually tracks them down and finds out

1. They are 14 and 15 year olds.

2. Both are traumatized

3. Black hair blue eyes

4. Both have supernatural abilities they can't fully control

5. Both are very sweet and are being more vigilante than villain

Bruce has already mentally signed the adoption papers.

Unfortunately, Danny has bad memories of another billionaire who kept trying to adopt him and is avoiding both him both as Batman and as Bruce Wayne. The boys run in to Harley Quinn and she figured out these kids needed help. She aids in thier language endeavors and if the only reason she knows Japanese as well as she does is from her binging anime for a few months during a quarantine caused by Scarecrow then thats her business.

Anyway, she gives them not-therapy since she can't ethically give them therapy therapy and in exchange they pay her with cash they stole. Neato. Rin eventually gets onto an ADHD medication that suits him and he's doing so much better. He uses a lot of the coping skills aunt harley taught him and its like hes a totally different person. Granted Rin has to take an ungodly high dose for it to work due to his demonic heritage but they make due. They already rob banks, whats a few pharmaceutical companies?

Ivy and Harley pseudo adopt Rin and Danny and sometimes the boys would just come over to Gotham to hang out or play with the pets. Rin loves cooking and has taken over the kitchen in his and dannys safe houses. He does most of the cooking and keeps the kitchen spotless. Danny does the laundry and dusting and they share most other chores. Rins used to having Yukio sleeping in the same room as him so sometimes he sneaks into Dannys room in the middle of the night to sleep on the floor.

Danny keeps waking up and moving him to the bed. Neither say anything about it and Rin assumes he slept walked into the bed and flees before Danny can be woken up and weirded out. Miscommunication! Yay!

Meanwhile the birdie brigade are on thier tails and watching/spying on them every chance they get. They're already making preparations in the manor for two more people.

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marivanilla05 · 1 year

Text

Pokemon AU (panels read right to left, start from the left page)

A list of everyone's teams are (warning: long post):

Shinichi/Conan:

Stoutland: He received it as a Lillipup from his parents and it has been his partner since. It's also a very responsible pokemon and makes sure Shinichi doesn't get into (too much) trouble.

Absol: He caught it in New York during the golden apple case. It's a very gentle pokemon but freaked Ran out when it first appeared.

Scorbunny: It's Conan's pokemon. It randomly started following him around during one of his cases, and he decided to catch it to try and separate Conan from Shinichi since Shinichi 'left' his pokemon with Conan but eventually got attached to it. It's very playful and has very strong kicks.

Ran:

Bewear: It hung around Teitan elementary when it was a Stufful, and Ran begged Shinichi to help her catch it since he was the only one with a pokemon at the time. Her parents were surprised when she brought it home, but it quickly became part of the family. It has a tendency to hug Shinichi a lot, who swears that it wants him dead.

Lopunny: Yukiko gave it to her as a gift before Shinichi's parents left. It's very strong and often accompanies Ran during karate training.

Minccino: It's not technically Ran's as she hasn't caught it, but it lives near the agency and always attempts to clean up Kogoro's messes. Ran's thinking about catching it but is worried that Minccino might not want to be caught since it was initially shy.

Sonoko:

Leavanny: Shinichi and Ran helped her catch it because she wanted a pokemon, and her mother wouldn't let her have one. She didn't like it at first but grew to love it after it saved her from an ursaring. Her mother wouldn't let her keep it at first, but she was stubborn, and eventually, her father convinced her mother to let it stay.

Furfrou: Her father received it during a business trip abroad, but didn't have the time to take care of it so he planned to give it away, but Sonoko begged him to let her keep it. It enjoys going shopping with her.

Meowth: It was Makoto's but it immediately got attached to her and since he goes on a lot of tournaments she offered to take care of it for him. It's protective of her (as all Makoto's pokemon are) which causes her to get a bit annoyed, but it's also very spoiled.

The Detective Boys:

Conan caught them because he believed the detective boys needed pokemon since they may get into some dangerous situations.

Ayumi has an oddish, Mitsuhiko has an elekid, and Genta has a magby. They happened to find the three while playing in a park and Conan decided they'd be a good catch since the three pokemon were already friends.

Eventually, the detective boys each capture a pokemon themselves as well. Ayumi -> Igglybuff Mitsuhiko -> Morelull Genta -> Cubone

Haibara

As Shiho, she didn't have any pokemon, as the BO only saw pokemon as tools/weapons and no members owned one. It took her a while before she opened up to the idea of having one.

Solosis: After deciding to have a pokemon, the detective boys make it their mission to find the perfect one. This lead to them being dragged into a case (as usual) which involved a man who worked a pharmaceutical company and solosis was his pokemon. They solved the man's death, with some assistance from solosis, who was left without trainer at the end of the case, so Haibara decided to take solosis. Since it helped its previous trainer with his job, it made an ideal partner for Haibara.

Gengar: Haibara caught it on her own. It would follow her around sometimes before she caught it (or solosis) and she'd make some analogy to it being a dark shadow of her past, so she fought it with solosis to stop it from following her, but ended up catching it. It ended up being Elena's old pokemon that was eventually released after her death. Although it seems like a scary pokemon, it is very kind and sweet and was following her around to protect her.

Agasa:

Magnemite: One of Agasa's first partners. It's very ditzy and clumsy. It would sometimes make its way to Shinichi's house and shock him in his sleep. It still does that to Conan whenever he comes over.

Klang: A pokemon Agasa caught when he traveled to Europe for a convention. It's a silent pokemon and loves to help Agasa around with his inventions. Shinichi says it's more reliable than Magnemite.

Togedemaru: Agasa recieved it from a trade with Fusae before she moved away. It is very responsible and overall Haibara's favorite due to the fact it puts a lot of effort into ensuring that Agasa maintains a healthy diet. Together, they are his nightmare. Shinichi, Ran, and Sonoko used to play a lot with it, as the detective boys do now.

Heiji:

Arcanine: On one of his 'adventures' as a child, Heiji found a wild Growlithe that was hurt. He snuck out a lot of food and bandages from home to try to help it until his parents found out and took it to a center. He was allowed to keep it as long as he didn't go out alone at night anymore (to which he agreed because you're no alone if you have a pokemon, right? Also, what his dad doesn't know won't hurt him.) As an arcanine, it's very loyal and strong, in which Kazuha says, "like trainer, like pokemon." It's also very playful and can pin Heiji down very easily when roughhousing.

He also has a Braviary and a Sirfech'd (that he received from his father)

Kazuha:

Xatu: When she was a kid, she woke up one morning to a Natu at her window and swore to Heiji that it was a sign. She begged him to help her catch it and they spent the whole week trying to find it again before eventually giving up. When she woke up the next morning, she found it again at her window, and with no hesitation, she threw a pokeball at it and immediately caught it. She calls it her lucky partner. Heiji gets unnerved by its staring.

Kogoro:

Slaking: He caught it as a vigoroth when he was still on the judo team. It's generally a lazy pokemon, but when the situation arises, it's an excellent fighter. Shinichi privately calls it the "second embodiment of laziness" the first being Kogoro himself.

Watchog: It was Eri's. She left it with him to make sure he was taking care of himself, although he thinks it's more of a nagging nuisance instead.

There's more but I probably write that all later.

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teecupangel · 2 years

Text

Desmond dying gives us the easiest way to throw him anywhere we want thanks to how mysterious the Eye, the Calculations, the actual Global Aurora Borealis device, and all these other Isu bullshit work.

Throw him back to the past to meet the other AC protagonists? Now easier with the existence of the Reader.

Keep him alive in the modern day or throw him further forward (like Watch_Dog Legion timeline maybe?)? Yeah, just say the device didn't kill him but changed him somehow and there was a delay (temporary death), or use some other Isu bullshit to revive him.

Wanna make crossovers? Easy. Every other series you can think of can be part of the Calculations that the Isus didn't choose. Just to name a few:

Horizon Zero Dawn? Change Abstergo to Far Zenith and you're good to go (Faro being a Templar gone rogue is also optional)

Resident Evil? Abstergo's main line of business is pharmaceutical which is also Umbrella's main line (you can make the initial viruses based on some failed Isu research to survive the solar flare)

Prototype? The Zeus virus can be based on a failed Isu research that perhaps Tinia researched (OG Alex Mercer being a Templar optional)

BBC Merlin? Magic came from the humans who got experimented ala Aita and Juno in Atlantis who then passed it on to their descendants together with the Isu genes (also if you like the headcanon that eyes turn gold when they use Eagle Vision, this means Desmond gets to be treated as a sorcerer who has no idea what's happening)

Animal Crossing? Desmond wakes up in a world where evolution was different and he is being driven to a town by some animal-looking person who isn't weirded out that he's sitting on the back of his taxi and, for some reason, now in debt

Armored Core? The Templars decide that making bigass robots is a good idea for some reason and the whole 'humans had to go underground for a while' can either be because of the solar flare, some other Isu bs, or because humans are humans

Prince of Persia? The dagger of time is a POE and it's the one that pulled Desmond to this timeline

Dead Space? The Marker is a POE and the supposed civilization that got taken out by the necromorphs before could be the Isus who couldn't escape to Earth

In conclusion:

It is very easy to turn Desmond into an isekai protagonist.

#the prototype one is actually an idea i have for a protocreed fic #also the resident evil one #this is what happens when i can't sleep #assassin's creed #desmond miles #teecup writes/has a plot #you can say a series and i'll probably be able to find a way to throw desmond into that series

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toulousewayne · 9 months

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My DCU Aesthetic: Gotham City

I have entire folder of pictures and ideas of what I want Gotham City to look like in the next film. I’m excited for what James Gunn has planned, but this is what i would do to our favorite crime riddled city. *I will be using photos to serve as visuals. I do not claim them as my own.*

Wayne Enterprise:

I loved the animated series and still watch it. I loved the Dark Deco style and I feel like the next live action Gotham City should borrow from that style especially when it comes to older buildings or those with wealth. Wayne Enterprises is not the original Wayne Tower however. Wayne Enterprises is a new building and housed most of the new branches. Like Wayne Pharmaceuticals, WayneTech, Wayne Entertainment,etc. While the WayneTech is the largest of several divisions Bruce Wayne does invest his time into the other divisions which has their own heads. Like Lucius Fox being the head of the WayneTech division and Tim Drake was once the CEO and the head executive over several departments and still acts as CEO when Bruce can’t attend to certain issues.

GCPD:

I think GCPD is one of the if not the oldest building in Gotham. It houses all of Gotham Finest, as well as the home of the Bat Signal. Commissioner Gordon runs the police for and wants to maintain order as well as restore the order within the precinct. Prior to him joining it the police department was extremely corrupt and made dealing with the mob. The building is old and has went through several revisions and additions like the major crimes building and the maximum security holding cells to hold and temporary hold some of Gotham’s most infamous and dangerous criminals until further transportation.

Old Gotham:

Old Gotham is the largest and south most port of the city. A lot of old family industries are rooted here along with a lot of businesses , the financial district and Gotham’s fashion district are located here. It also where most of the other popular locations are like Slaughter Swamp,Blackgate Prison and Lady Gotham.

New Gotham (Somerest)

New Gotham is the small and most central of the three larger islands. It’s the island that connects Arkham Island to the mainland. It is also where newer companies and corporations have housed the building on this island since its restoration from No Man’s Land. Gotham’s East End is here protected at lot by Catwoman herself. Chinatown is also here as well.

North Gotham (Burnley):

North Gotham is the north most part of the city. This is also the most historic part of the city with a lot of wealthy residents and city officials residing in this area. Gotham State University is also in this area and has several popular small shops, Townhomes, City Hall,cafè, and as well as several prominent landmarks like Gotham Cathedral and several other smaller churches like Devity Church.

Wayne Manor:

Stately Wayne Manor located in the Bristol district, just outside of the city limits. It’s where some of the upper class residents. Most of the older families settled here but a lot of them in last few decades relocated to the city living in penthouses and townhouses. It’s also home to several of Gotham’s oldest and most prominent schools.

Gotham City Map:

I used this map and different variations when I am talking about my version of Gotham city, as well as thinking of locations within the city for storytelling. As well as a additional one I found that looks like a an irl map of Gotham, which is part of New Jersey.

#batfamily #dc comics #dc universe #dc live action #batman #batfam #dick grayson #gotham knights #jason todd #tim drake

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heyiwrotesomethings · 1 year

Note

hey can we get a part 4 on Crash

angst to tooth rotting fluff

in case you need ideas :

shinobu tell her back story

reader tells theirs

or they tell each other something that happend during mission

Crash Prt IV: Comfort

Shinobu Kochou x They/ Them Reader

A/N: PrtIII I always go re-read previous parts when people ask for sequels and I noticed that they kind of already had a bit of a sharing of backstories in the previous part so I kind of went the mission route. Hope you can find something to like about this, thank you for reading! Word Count: 1,641

Shinobu noticed something was off after she had read the latest letter from (Y/n). Not only had it come a few days later than it usually would, but the words were also lacking their usual cheer and the letter itself was a bit shorter than what was normal for their usual correspondences. It was hard not being able to see each other. Sometimes for weeks at a time.

Being Hashira, they had little free time and even when they did, that free time almost never seemed to coincide. They would still come to visit the other if they weren’t downright exhausted, but since the other had to work, they still weren’t getting the quality time they both desired.

Shinobu briefly sat back in her chair. If she remembered correctly, (Y/n) should be scheduled for a period of rest soon. She leaned back over her desk and retrieved a fresh piece of stationary and began penning a response, inviting (Y/n) to rest within the Butterfly Mansion. Even though Shinobu found herself with more work than usual, it would be nice to at least be in proximity of her beloved. A sentiment she was sure (Y/n) could agree with.

She rolled the letter up and secured it with En. She made sure to thank her crow and promise her extra seed when she returned, noticing how the usually content bird looked a bit ruffled having to leave (Y/n)’s crow, Unmei, so soon when they had only just arrived from their long flight. Having been spending more time together themselves, the crows had become quite the couple as well. Literal love birds; It was rather sweet.

If all went well, they would all have a good three or four days together within the mansion.

Shinobu was surprised to see En return with a response early the next morning, showing yet again that she was one of the fastest Kasugai Crows in the corps. She plopped the letter in Shinobu’s lap and promptly went to roost with Unmei until the other crow had to return to (Y/n).

Shinobu opened the letter, finding the same lack of cheer as the previous message, but at least they had agreed to come and had expressed that they were looking forward to seeing everyone. The poor slayer must have been really going through it as of late. Hopefully a little time off would help them perk right back up.

***

On the morning that (Y/n) arrived, Shinobu was much too busy to greet them right away. She assumed it was fine since she knew the other girls were more than qualified to help (Y/n) settle in as they had done a handful of times before. (Y/n) would probably be exhausted and want to sleep anyway, so she didn’t think too much about it until they came knocking at her laboratory door.

“(Y/n), good morning love. It’s so good to see you. I would have thought you would want to nap.” Shinobu could afford a brief pause in her work at that moment, so she looped around the table to greet (Y/n) with a quick peck on the lips and what was supposed to be a brief hug, but (Y/n) kept her close even after she moved to let go.

“I just really wanted to see you. Is it all right if I hang out in here with you?“

“I suppose that will be fine. As long as you promise not to distract me,” Shinobu teased. “There is much to be done.”

(Y/n) managed a half smile, “I’ll try to stay out of your way.”

That was a bit strange… but Shinobu chalked it up to them being tired from their trip. She gave them another quick peck and cleared a small spot at the table for them before diving right back into her pharmaceuticals. An influx of patients had really put a dent in their supply, so Shinobu had been working overtime to restore it, one drug at a time.

(Y/n) silently watched Shinobu work, slowly slumping over in their seat until their head was resting on their arms over the table. Their eyes dropped shut and their breathing slowed. Shinobu’s eyes flickered to them briefly and she smiled to herself while she continued to grind some dried sage into a fine powder.

It was some point after she started measuring the powder that (Y/n) started to become restless, a sudden sob pushing past their lips startled Shinobu and made her knock over the measured powders over the table. She was not annoyed in the slightest however, she was much more worried about whatever nightmare was plaguing her beloved’s mind.

“(Y/n), darling, it’s only a dream,” she soothed, stepping over to their hunched and quaking form in hopes of waking them before they could experience anymore sorrow, “come back to me, wake up.”

Shinobu looped an arm around the and used the other to lightly scrape her fingers up and down their back. Her cheek rested high between their shoulders blades, but she quickly had to readjust when (Y/n) jolted in their seat, back now pin straight. Even so, they still weren’t quite awake yet.

“(Y/n),” Shinobu called their name more sternly now, hoping to bring them back sooner, “wake up!”

She then noticed (Y/n)’s eyes focus on her, and after a tense moment, they slumped back against the table, exhausted and breathing just a bit erratically.

“I’m sorry.” They croaked.

“Shhh, just breathe for a minute. You’ve done nothing wrong.” But the sentiment only seemed to make (Y/n) feel worse, their back trembled violently beneath Shinobu’s hand.

Shinobu coaxed them to breathe between light touches and after a time, (Y/n) quieted. With tender care, Shinobu lifted (Y/n)’s head and dabbed at the corners of their eyes with the sleeve of her haori before cupping their cheek with the palm of her hand, skimming her thumb over their damp skin.

“Are you going to be alright? That must have been an awful nightmare. Poor dear, you’re still shaking.” She shrugged off her haori all together to give them an extra layer. “It was only a dream, let the feeling pass.”

“But it wasn’t just a dream.” (Y/n) whispered, “Those people really died because I didn’t get there in time.”

“We can only do so much, my love. You did the best you could. At the end of the night, that’s all any of us can say.”

“They were newly weds. They looked like us.”

Shinobu pulled them in to rest their head against her chest, stroking the back of their head, they continued speaking after a moment.

“There was nothing I could do but lay them together in their final moments, help them hold each other’s hand. They were too weak to even speak, they just, stared at each other until they were… gone.”

“I’m sorry, darling. You did help them stay together in the end. I’m sure putting them next to each other in those last moments meant more to them than you will ever know.”

Shinobu held (Y/n) until they pulled away on their own. Their eyes caught the mess of powder on the table, but Shinobu was quick to bring their attention back to her.

“It was only an accident and wasn’t even your fault. Don’t worry, I have plenty more.”

“Still…”

“No.” Shinobu tapped the bridge of their nose, then kissed it for good measure, “How about we take tea in my room?”

“You don’t have to let your work suffer because of me. I’ll be fine.”

“You are my priority as well. Kanao and Aoi are plenty capable of doing this task and will probably be happy to do it just to make me step away from the lab for a bit. The only thing suffering right now is you, and I cannot have that,” another kiss and a gentle tug of their hand, “come with me now.”

(Y/n) squeezed Shinobu’s offered hand, grateful for the warmth and the unique feeling of those lotion smoothed calluses. They could hold her hand forever if she’d let them.

“Okay.”

They saw Sumi, Kiyo and Naho in the hall as they left the lab and they were eager to lend their assistance. One went off to make tea, one to get Kanao, and another to get Aoi to help with the medicine demands while Shinobu took a short break.

It didn’t take long for (Y/n) and Shinobu to be cuddled up in front of Fugu’s tank, watching the fish lazily swim about while they sipped the relaxing tea brew Sumi had whipped up with some help from Aoi.

“I wish it could be like this all of the time,” (Y/n) murmured behind the rim of their cup, “I wish I could be with you every day, that demons didn’t exists and we could just live like normal people.”

“We will just have to make the most of the time we do spend together. Just as anyone else. No one truly knows how much time they have. Even if demons were out of the question, there are many other factors at play,” she leaned back from her position sat between (Y/n)’s legs and let her head rest against their chest, “No matter what we may face, every second I get to spend with you is a victory. I feel like I’m really getting away with something when I get to be with you like this.”

(Y/n) put their empty cup back on the table so they could hug Shinobu closer to their front and hide their face against her neck. They took a moment to burn the feeling into their brain, the comfort of Shinobu’s bedroom, the wisteria scent that clung to her, and how her fingers ran over their own. They really were getting away with something special, weren’t they?

“I love you.”

“And I love you.”

#demon slayer oneshots #demon slayer x reader #kny oneshots #kny x reader #shinobu x reader #shinobu kocho x reader #shinobu kochou x reader #requests #anonymous

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vykker · 11 days

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Oddworld Headcanon 6/?: Vykker Families

I was looking at concept art of the Vykkers, my beloved perfect science boys who have never done anything wrong, when I read this line:

"Headley, the Vykkers' auctioneer, is a rare case among the species. Most Vykkers are consumed by the surgical and pharmaceutical industry, but some, like Headley, work on the fringe of the family business." - The Art of Oddworld Inhabitants, Page 222.

Hearing it described as a "family business" was interesting, but I assumed it was more of a metaphor for their species in general. Not literal. But then, I saw this image:

"Humphrey and Irwin Vykkers knew that together they could bring experimentation to the forefront of modern science, as long as they stuck together."

Wait- is Vykkers a surname?

I think everyone and their dad headcanons Humprey and Irwin as being a vicious married couple. Even when I played MO for the first time as a little kid, I thought Irwin was Humphrey's comically shrill wife. They even flirt at the end of the first cutscene where we meet them, with Irwin calling Humphrey a genius and Humphrey rolling his eyes playfully like he's not loving it. So lets assume these twisted old fruits got Vykker-Married and started a thriving business empire. What does "family" look like to a vykker?

One piece of lore that I've always found hilariously fitting is that a vykker's greatest love is always for themselves. Vykkers are a unisex species and breed via self-insemination, which is often seen in snails, but even occurs in reptiles. I loved the idea of Vykkers being so self-absorbed, they don't even want to breed with other Vykkers. Now, some irl lizards perform what's called pseudocopulation, wherein the ritual of breeding triggers ovulation, but no actual breeding occurs. Not saying vykkers do this. Stop thinking about it. I said stop thinking about it! What I'm saying is, there are examples of animals not requiring another of their species to breed, but still mimicking the ritual of it, either as instincts left over from their non-hermaphroditic ancestors, or for other reasons we haven't confirmed yet.

What I'm saying is, vykkers could have the framework in place to experience romantic feelings even if it's not strictly necessary for their species' survival. Alternatively, two vykkers may pair off just for the societal benefits. I imagine two vykkers who are friends, have the same shitty values, and want to live the same lifestyles might choose to get hitched. Benefits would include a dual income lifestyle, having someone you can rely on to help you, certain legal protections and benefits, someone to manage your estate if you die, and not being lonely at home by yourself.

But also- they can raise their kids together. The vykker parenting style is something I've put a lot of thought into because there's so many interesting and funny possibilities.

First off though- how many kids do vykkers have? I always pictured them as laying a single egg once per lifetime or something. But then I noticed in this official, rendered art... Humphrey has NIPPLES!

He has FOUR nipples. At first, I thought only his bottom pecs had them, but then I saw this concept art, where its clear that vykkers are meant to have four:

Interns don't have nipples. Mudokons don't have nipples. Their chests are completely smooth. From what I can tell, the mudokon, slig, and glukkon queens- who are covered in boobs- are the only other individuals to have them. Maybe it was just added to be a creepy design element? But then again... vykkers ALSO have belly buttons. It does not appear that interns or mudokons have belly buttons, but it's a little hard to tell. Their skin is so texturized, it's possible they do have them and it's just not noticeable.

So why do vykkers have four nipples AND belly buttons?* I hate this line of questioning. I was a lot happier imaging them just laying an egg every once and a while. However, I'm not sure about that now. I think... vykkers might be livebearers. They might have 4 offspring at a time.

*Egg-laying reptiles actually DO have belly buttons but they don't look the same as mammalian belly buttons. It's more of a line. Google "corn snake bellybuttons". Theyre very cute!

Consider the following: imagine if Humphrey and Irwin had kids. Our inventions are doing well, lets get some inheritors going so they can hoard our family wealth and never share it. The two of them would have at LEAST 4 offspring but maybe 8. How do you do science and keep EIGHT babies alive? There's no way either half of this couple is going to stay home to care for them! So they invent Baby Chow. Baby Chow makes babies grow at an extreme rate- don't need to pay the babysitter as long- AND it frees up your arms so you don't have to breastfeed.

Remember when Vykkers Labs was described above as a "family business"? Imagine if Humphrey and Irwin had 4 kids each, then their 8 children got married and each of the 16 vykkers had 4 more baby vykkers.... I failed algebra in high school but:

16 x 4 = 64 vykkers!!! And that's just if three generations of vykkers had one litter each! There could be a LOT more, assuming they can be pregnant more than once, AND assuming we are looking at like, 4 or 5 generations of vykkers at this point, considering how they love to artificially extend their lifespans through surgery and treatments. And how they might just hand their kids off to the nearest intern to serve as a nanny while they immediately get back to work, thus minimizing any repercussions that might stop someone from having a ton of kids.

So when they say Vykkers Labs is a family... I think its literal. I think a lot of the vykkers we see in Munch's Oddysee are direct descendants of Humphrey and Irwin- their children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and etcetera- or are outside hires hoping to marry in to their wealthy family business. I think our boys' genetics are alllll over Vykkers Labs, their laboratory that they own, and would never want to share with anyone BUT their clone-offspring.

On a related note: childrearing-wise, I picture vykkers as the worst kind of PTO moms. You know how vykkers can only truly love themselves? Well, since they reproduce asexually, that would mean that each child is a literal clone of their parent. It stands to reason that vykkers would be overly and obnoxiously consumed with making sure their clone-child has the best of everything. Not exactly love, more like control and possessiveness. More like wanting to give them everything you never had as a kid.

Can't you imagine a vykker parent, with that awful shrill voice, shrieking at some poor school counselor because their little Timmy would NEVER lobotomize the class pet, how dare you accuse him of such a thing? Or, how DARE you not let little Timmy join the Dissection Team- I have friends in the Magog Cartel, you know!!! The entitlement level would be off the charts. Every School Board Meeting would end with someone getting stabbed.

I could also see Humphrey and Irwin being like "we will raise our children communally so we never know who made who :)" then immediately getting paternity tests behind the others' back, lol

Anyway what are your thoughts? Writing this made me want to write some horrible vykker OC's who are Humphrey and Irwin's shitty entitled grandchildren.

#oddworld #headcanon #vykker #vykkers #vykkers labs #also I just realized: all of the vykkers in MO are purple #Doc Vykkers in SW is green #my HC is Doc Vykkers is a different lineage who married into the Vykker family at some point but never got past the fringes #he kept the name Vykkers though because it's a household brand. More credibility

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