#stuff that we were not AT ALL equipped to deal with or handle

[murkyhazed-is-archiving]

when your bestie for life but also former co-worker tells you the former work tea and you just

[wheneverfeasible]

🧠🪱Wriggly Wednesday🪱🧠

Thank you for the tags my lovelies! @queenie-ofthe-void @steviewashere

So we all know the florist/tattooist trope, yeah? Steve is the pretty little florist and Eddie is the tough looking tattoo artist, maybe their shops are even next door to each other, or at least nearby. It’s a great trope.

Except…

Eddie is the florist and Steve is the tattoo artist.

A bit of modern AU here too maybe but…Eddie got in trouble as a kid selling stuff , okay? He ended up in juvie for a bit, and he was terrified that this was it and his uncle would finally declare him a lost cause just like his father, but…he doesn’t. He encourages Eddie, knows his nephew could be better than any other Munson, and it helps. Eddie wants to be better.

He handles juvie well, gives up dealing, and serves community service helping out at the local garden (it wasn’t his initial choice, but he takes to it almost immediately). After everything is all said and done, community service over and he’s fully free once more, he still volunteers at the gardens.

Eddie, he discovers, likes flowers. He likes discovering the meaning behind them, the totally rad Latin names of them, and he likes growing something from nothing and watching them bloom. Eventually, when he’s older, he opens his own little shop.

He doesn’t look like your typical florist, all dark colored clothes and long hair and tattoos and piercings, but he’s knowledgeable in what he does and his flowers always look so pretty and nice and he’s happy.

Steve was a pampered rich kid, until he wasn’t. He did sports, and he liked them, but not enough to make a career out of it. He never felt that pull towards anything. He did like babysitting well enough, even if the kids were more like friends than clients, but it wasn’t something he wanted to do forever either.

Will, one of the kids he babysat, was an artist. He sketched and painted and even took up a bit of pottery for a while, though that phase passed quickly. But Steve was intrigued by the drawings Will made. He tried to recreate them, and Will actually helped his technique a little, but it still wasn’t quite what Steve wanted to do.

And then one day, bored while waiting for his little friends to finish gawking at the nerd store he took them to in the city, Steve grabbed a pen from the counter and started his little doodles on his own arm, since he didn’t have any paper. And…he kind of liked that. One of the kids, Jane, noticed his drawing and held out her own arm for him to draw on. And he liked that a lot better.

After that, Steve began noticing tattoos on people. Permanent drawings that didn’t wash off, and things his father absolutely hated. And there were a lot of different styles, he noticed. And soon Steve was purchasing books about tattoo techniques and styles, about the history of tattoos in different cultures, and, with the last money he ever got from his father, he bought himself tattoo equipment and fake skin to practice on.

Steve really likes drawing, but he loves tattooing more. He looks nothing like your typical tattoo artist though, with his pastels and polos and styled hair that still speaks of his prep upbringing. He’s not covered in tattoos or piercings, but he slowly makes a name for himself. He gets a job in a studio, attends conventions and things, growing in skill and practice until one day he can afford his own little shop all his own.

When a new tattoo parlor opens up right next door to Eddie’s flower shop, he’s ecstatic at first. He could use a new tattoo. Then he meets the owner and there’s no way this jock looking pretty boy can handle the sort of ink that Eddie wants. He sees the work the man does, pretty watercolor flowers and cliché anchors, and figures the guy would run screaming for the hills if he had to tattoo a screaming skull or something.

Maybe they kind of snip at each other in passing, though Steve seems to enjoy it and laughs at Eddie’s sarcasm, and Eddie…Eddie likes his laugh and his smile. Maybe Steve buys a single flower one day, then tucks it into Eddie’s hair with a smirk before leaving silently, and Eddie…doesn’t know what to do with that.

Maybe one day Eddie sees an original piece Steve is working on, a bipedal monstrous creature with slimy looking skin and a head that opened into petals full of teeth. It was metal as fuck. Steve explains it’s his own interpretation of a monster from this game these kids (not kids anymore) he used to babysit would play, and Eddie…Eddie realizes he’s in very real danger of falling in love with this man.

Lucky for him, Steve is already smitten with the metalhead florist who works next door; he’s just been waiting for Eddie to catch up.

For their first date, Steve tattoos him for free, then they go and get honest to Satan milkshakes afterwards. Their next date, Eddie takes him to the local public gardens and tells him all about the flora there, their scientific names and history, and afterwards they get coffee and talk about what they want in life. Their third date they go to a vintage drive-in movie, though neither could tell you what it was they went to see, far too busy with…other pursuits.

A few years later, after Eddie says yes to the ring, they get matching tattoos of the other’s initials in the petals of a flower with teeth. When they get married, they get the date they met tattooed to their inner wrist.

Later, they add the date the little girl they adopt officially becomes part of their family. A few years after that, that same little girl grins as she watches a new date be added to their wrists, holding the boy who just became her little brother.

By the time Eddie and Steve retire, their wrists are full of dates. Eddie tends to a little garden outside their home, their kids helping out whenever they visit with the grandkids, taking over when Eddie just wants to sit and enjoy the flowers. Steve is there with him, a canvas open as he sketches and later paints Eddie and their family amongst the flowers.

Sometimes, as a little treat, he’ll even add a little demogorgon hidden amongst the blooms for Eddie to find. Eddie always likes those ones the best.

-

No pressure tags: @derythcorvinus @katyawriteswhump @fkinkindagauche @sp0o0kylights @skitchskatchbat and you guessed it, tagging you first 😤 @stervrucht

[wildissylupus]

Can we get some OW New Blood headcanons? Whether it be some type of angst, heartfelt, or lighthearted interactions between the group.

Ask and you shall receive!! It's been awhile since I've done some New Blood stuff so let's see what I can do. Let's start off with some head canons first.

The New Bloods are the biggest human help in getting Zarya to unlearn her prejudices against omnics, it's mostly by telling her their own experiences with the Crisis (and with Hana it's her experiences with the Gwishi). They also call her out if she does or says something in line with her prejudice.

Cassidy is giving them all stealth training cause holy shit he cannot be the only person on that team who knows how to stealth, Baptiste is close but Cassidy knows that Talon stealth training is not going to cut it.

On top of that Cassidy is also giving specific training to D.Va so if she has to fight outside of her Mech he knows he can handle herself.

All of them know about Pharah's crush on Angela, either being told by Pharah herself or from Cassidy complaining that Genji and Pharah are hopeless at romance (he's been dealing with this for a max of 14 years at this point, he's allowed to complain)

They are all in agreement that if they are on a mission in a Talon base, they need to steal as much equipment as possible, mainly focusing on medical supplies.

They all make strategies on how to best use their skills together. They also sometimes include other agents abilities as well.

Pharah is the least foul mouthed of the group, only really swearing outside of missions, the rest? Not so much. By far the people who swear most often are Cassidy and D.Va.

----------------------- Cassidy: So I hear you you and Angie where around each other a lot while she was in Cairo, anything happened? Pharah: We just... hang out, spent time together, nothing other then what we would usually do before. Cassidy: ....Fareeha it's been fourteen years, for the love of god please make a move that isn't just flirty banter. ----------------------- Zarya: I don't understand how you have so many fans. Why do people like to watch you play games that they can play themselves? D.Va: The same reason why people play the Olympics and other sports, cause they like to see other doing something they love! ----------------------- D.Va: Ok so what if I initiate Self Destruct and you shoot them when they get behind cover! That way no matter what we're still hitting them. Cassidy: I don't know, might be able to hit some of them but I doubt it would be worth riskin' the Mech. D.Va: Oh, OH! What about if Niran launches you into the air and you shoot them from above! Cassidy: Hey...That ain't half bad! ----------------------- Baptiste: You know, you should really get some rest, it's not good to overwork yourself. Pharah: Have you been talking with my mum? Cause if she did you should tell her to take her own advise. Baptiste: No, no, I noticed it myself. Though I do think it's funny that both Ana and Cole seem to have the same issue as you. Pharah: Well, it kinda runs if the family. ----------------------- Pharah: Hey Cole, did I tell you that Jean thought we were dating? Cassidy: Ew, what?! What made you think that?! Baptiste: You two just seemed to have a lot of history! I was curious! Pharah: Yeah, it was our history that made you curious, nothing else more personal. Baptiste: Fareeha, I swear to god- ----------------------- Pharah: You know, you and Brigitte remind me of Cole and Angela when they were younger. D.Va: Ugh, Cass said the same thing, but I know I'm way cooler then he is! Pharah: HA! He would have said the same but trust me, it's a compliment.

[mariacallous]

As an american it's so damn frustrating all the choices political leaders here keep making

Aid blocked for 6 months single handedly by johnson while other gop members said they supported Ukraine but refused to sign the discharge petition (and then everyone praises johnson for his "bravery" as if he doesn't have oceans of blood on his hands for that delay)

Biden and the white house wringing their hands over allowing Ukraine to use US weapons on valid military targets getting even more people killed

Which, purely from a selfish point of view, all these choices not only kill Ukrainians, but they also weaken the US geopolitically by making use look like an unreliable partner (because we're being an unreliable partner). Even if you don't care about innocent people dying, a lot of these people care about China, and... do you think it's appealing to our pacific allies to work with us when they see us leaving Ukraine out to dry?

Do you think maybe Taiwan might end up thinking "ok, but will they send the military or will they bicker internally for 6 months?"

It's a disgrace, especially when the most humanitarian thing to do of properly arming Ukraine is also the most self interested thing the US could do and yet we still refuse to do it

Decimating the army of a major geopolitical rival by sending old equipment that we were probably going to have to dispose of soon, spending a minuscule fraction of the US federal budget for massive benefits to the US ranging from dealing serious damage to russia and deterring China, all while not risking any american troops... and we still can't be bothered to do it?

It's... it's just shameful. Makes us look like a joke, makes us look undependable, makes it hard to want to work with us when our own infighting gets in the way of us meeting our commitments

Disgraceful how the policy makers in the US have handled things

...I seriously think that if the US had basically opened the floodgates on support from the start it could have been so much cheaper for us while getting less Ukrainians killed... might have actually made russia think twice if as soon as they invaded they saw massive amounts of military aid in the pipeline... but no, we've been drip feeding it and for all the words about "as long as it takes" we refuse to actually do that

Anyway, sorry about this ask. Just... sometimes I see people make post about Ukraine and... there's not a lot of people I can talk with about this stuff who'll actually listen over here, they don't seem to get how important this is not just in terms of... what's good for us and good for the world, but just... innocent people are dying, people are dying trying to defend their homes because we won't give them the tools they need to defend themselves... and that really really bothers me cause I have a shred of humanity but... but not a lot of other people here seem to get that

Hope you're having as good a day as possible

I agree with you and it's so sad and sobering that there are many who don't see it this way.

[utilitycaster]

In the most recent CR episode I found it really interesting (and really concerning) that it Laudna's truth about wanting Bells Hells to ripcord out of saving the world came hot on the heels of Imogen's truth about not wanting to save the gods

Idk it could just be me, but it seemed like her truth was just another attempt to placate Imogen's moral confusion, while simultaneously pushing those things back onto the whole group

All it makes me think of is the fanon and 4SD discussions about Imogen and Laudna retiring to a farm and living happily ever after. What are either of their reasons for remaining with Bells Hells at this point, if their truths are that they don't want to save the world?

See, that actually seemed fine to me! Fearne had earlier admitted she felt they were ill-equipped for the job and likely to fail, so it's not just them who feel it, and honestly I think that Laudna's confession was one of the more valid ones that I hope get unpacked. Fjord and Jester made a very similar admission to each in both episode 72 and episode 118 of Campaign 2, of "hey, wouldn't it be nice if we just ran away somewhere quiet and never had to deal with this again" and I think that having that admission and then finding a way forward anyway is a really great moment. I didn't write at length about how Orym's "but we have to work together and do this" has also been a really big factor in the party's dysfunction because I covered a lot of that in my discussion of how he handles his own grief well and the grief and pain of others very badly, but honestly it's good that Fearne and Laudna are getting to "we don't have to do this, this was always thrust upon us because an old guy brought us to a cool orc who hired us to look into some stuff and in the process found out that the comparatively small-time political crook was tangentially involved in a a vast cosmic death cult conspiracy that several of our parents are also involved with."

My issue with Imogen is that she literally said two episodes ago she's never prayed and now she's claiming the gods never listened to her, as well as that her reasoning is the horrifyingly self-absorbed "they don't love her", but I actually think it's fine if this party does not wish to save the gods on the grounds of "we feel underqualified and overwhelmed and like we've been at the mercy of many (mortal) masters with no time to pursue our own interests." And I think that Laudna didn't force this specific thing on the rest of the party; she said they could all ripcord, but didn't say who should do it or who felt that way or force them into agreement.

I've talked about the campaign's earlier pacing at length and I don't want to revisit it at length because it evened out, but more so than any other party, Bells Hells has rarely had self-directed adventures. That's a big reason why they're such a mess; they didn't need to develop the tools to come to consensus because Eshteross or Ryn or Keyleth would give them tasks, so we never actually have delved particularly deeply into what most of the party members want to be doing, which is why we're here with this group that's mostly stuck together because they've had jobs to do. I think acknowledging that is an important step, because the task at hand (scouting on Ruidus) is in my opinion within their abilities, but they've been pushed and pushed and have finally reached a point where they can't just keep going. (This by the way is the underlying premise of this post; this is the fundamental reality of Bells Hells as a party. If you like that the most then hell yeah, but a lot of people who claim to love C3 are blaming the entire plot of the campaign for why the party is a mess which is like, so you like the premises of these characters and dislike the vast majority of the actual story in which they exist, and you really just want the story of Campaign 1 or Campaign 2 but Ashton is there.)

With that said though, I do agree that's kind of at the core of Imogen and Laudna. They're so insular, and that's been claimed as a feature, not a bug, for much of the fanon of that relationship. Like, I think Laudna is valid for this specific statement, but unlike Fjord and Jester, who had established in through the course of the campaign both deep ties to each of the rest of the Mighty Nein and a profound sense of responsibility in general, I find myself wondering why Imogen and Laudna don't go off and live in a cottage together and leave the rest of the party to handle this. I mean, Imogen is also impossibly tied up in the fate of Ruidus, but she dithers about the approach so much I wonder why she doesn't decide that perhaps she should stay out of it altogether and retire to that cottage with Laudna until it's all over.

Personally, my thought is that Imogen does in fact secretly like being the special Ruidusborn Exaltant On The Other Side, especially since she's realized her mother wasn't that (as she had hoped). I agree with the fairly common opinion that Imogen and Ashton are in many ways extremely similar people, but whereas Ashton just got a very brutal wake up call of "your parents did fuck up and you're not built different and your desperate attempt to be something special could have hurt everyone" Imogen is still out here going full Javert on everyone's personal thoughts. So I suspect she won't ripcord out in the end, and therefore Laudna won't. But I do think it's valid for Laudna to bring up, and indeed, one of the many things that would make great progress in fixing this party dynamic would be Laudna independently expressing her own needs some more instead of being Imogen's Yes-Woman or projecting her own desires onto other people as I suspect she's doing with Fearne and the shard.

[frozenjokes]

hOtgUy drops by to pick up his visor, and Cub viscerally regrets not googling his name before then (1/2)

Next

Tuesday was a big stocking day for the little shop where Cub worked, and easily his busiest of the week as he managed most of the stock, keeping track of what they had, sorting things, generally doing anything that kept him off the sales floor. The type of people shopping in a place like this tended to have fragile egos, and Cub, despite his previous best efforts, did not have a delicate touch. Self proclaimed superheroes would happily get into fights, suffer massive injuries, and generally engage in borderline suicidal behavior in the pursuit of a thrill, but say they have a big head one time, and you find out who the most sensitive members of society really are. (And she did have a big head, literally and metaphorically, it wasn’t Cub’s fault they didn’t have a helmet that fit.)

You could say he and his manager occasionally butted heads after incidents like these, disagreeing especially on how the aftermath was handled (admittedly, never well on Cub’s part, but he struggled to mask under pressure), but there was nothing either of them could do about it besides stick Cub in the back where no one could see him and pretend to like each other. She couldn’t fire him; a higher up was a family friend, and they knew Cub needed the help, and Cub couldn’t quit, because, again, money was always an issue, so the two of them just had to suck it up and deal. In the end though, it wasn’t a bad gig, not when he didn’t have to speak to people most of the time. It would just be a little nicer if his manager wasn’t always convinced he was doing a shit job.

Cub had been excited this morning for that to change, though in the flurry of handling supplies and dealing with deliveries, and having to micromanage everything, he had forgotten HotGuy was coming. The trucks had been late today, as well as a few other issues Cub had been dealing with, so he was still outside around noon, and coming back in to hear HotGuy’s voice was quite the scare. Mostly because he was so loud.

“-Oh yes! Positively delightful, knew exactly what the problem was and assured me you all would have exactly what I’m looking for. You know, I don’t often take a look around the smaller stores for the things I need; a lot of my equipment is custom made, but this place is just adorable, seriously, adorable. I’m so lucky Cub and I ran into each other! Is he here? Could I speak with him?”

His manager was clearly flustered, reasonable given that bigger names like HotGuy never stopped by smaller shops like this. It was cheaper, sure, but the quality wasn’t always there, and if you can afford the better stuff, you might as well spend the money.

“Thank you-” she finally said, “I’m sure I can get you what you need right here though, just a replacement for the visor screen, right?”

“Oh, that’s alright! Cub said he’d have it ready for me.”

Cub heard the strain in his manager’s voice, and it was quite clear the last thing she wanted was for Cub to say something rude or scare this high value customer away in some other creative way, “Cub’s very busy right now in the back, we get new stock on Tuesdays and he usually handles most of the-”

“I can wait!” HotGuy announced proudly, and Cub cringed from his place in the back. He couldn’t see his manager, but he could practically hear the strain in the silence, probably split 50/50 between bafflement that HotGuy was going to wait to be served and fear that he wanted Cub to be the person to serve him.

Probably fair, because when Cub finally poked his head out from the back, he was not ready for HotGuy to have no legs. The wheelchair itself was a sight; heavily customized to HotGuy’s colors but also full of stickers and even advertisements on the sides. Was- were those kitchen knives duct taped to the handles-? HotGuy himself was dressed in his usual costume, still wearing the cracked visor, but he had plain black sweatpants on as well, almost jarring in comparison to the rest of his intricate costume, though, more jarring was the fact there was nothing in the pant legs.

“Cub!” his manager hissed, not subtle at all, but maybe that was warranted given that his staring was just as conspicuous.

Cub jumped, scrambling to explain himself in a flurry of thoughts and stutters, but he and panic did not mix well, the resulting defensive coming out as, “He had legs yesterday-“ which was definitely one of the worst things that could have come out of his mouth, so he excused himself immediately. If he could escape out the back door fast enough, a stray truck might take pity on his plight and run him over. His manager broke the stunned silence, apologizing profusely, but she was completely drowned out by HotGuy’s laugh, an impossibly loud, barking thing. He said something, but Cub didn’t hear it or his manager’s response, though he did hear their shuffling and then- wheels? Was that the wheelchair?

“Cub?” Whatever Cub was expecting next, it was not HotGuy’s face poking in through the doorway. Probably much worse than his imagined worst case scenario, and Cub had to fight the urge to get up and run.

“Hi,” he managed instead, then, after the voices of literally everyone he knew started yelling in his head, he continued with a meek, “Sorry.” ‘That’s not genuine,’ something sneered, a mangled conglomerate of many voices, school teachers, old friends, parents- ‘Again, and mean it this time.’ “I’m really. Sorry.” Cub tried again, but it still wasn’t right, it still wasn’t human-

“It’s fine, I don’t care,” HotGuy said, far better at sounding like he meant it, “Nothing I haven’t heard before, though, usually that particular comment comes from kids,” Scar laughed, but seemed to realize pretty quickly that Cub did not find it very funny. Cub didn’t even want to know what his face was doing right now.

“I’m sorry.” That sounded better.

But HotGuy only cocked his head, something like concern dancing behind his eyes, though, it was hard to tell behind the visor. Cub didn’t even know what color they were. “Can I come in?” He sounded friendly. Cub’s voice didn’t seem to be working anymore, so he just nodded, miserable. HotGuy wasted no time doing just that, though he struggled a bit with the mess, another entirely mortifying thing to have to watch. Cub should get up. Do something about it. He didn’t, though.

“One of my prosthetics got damaged yesterday after we parted ways. CuteGuy wasn’t happy with me still, and he let me know it. The equipment is sturdy, obviously, it has to be, but there’s a lot of moving parts, and because I’m so active, maintenance has to be performed relatively often. Since one needs fixing up, might as well make sure the other is in tip top shape, yeah?” HotGuy was quiet for a moment, but Cub still couldn’t say anything, so the hero continued, looking curious, “Did you not know? That I’m an amputee?”

Cub opened his mouth to answer, but that just wasn’t going to happen, so he shook his head instead, embarrassment building. HotGuy looked entirely fascinated by that information, and there was some kind of odd open mouthed half-smile on his face, but Cub for the life of him could not tell what HotGuy was thinking. Luckily, the other wasn’t exactly trying to keep it a secret.

“I think I’m impressed. I also think I need to model with my wheelchair more. Goodness.” HotGuy stopped, plucking his phone from his pocket and looking something up, “No, that’s like- when you google me, that’s like the first thing that every website says about me! It’s what I’m known for- how-?” Cub cringed, but HotGuy didn’t seem to notice, shooting up in his chair.. Excited..? “You don’t even know how it happened! I bet you have no idea! Oh, I haven’t gotten to tell that story to anyone who didn’t already know in ages and- well, before when I told people the wounds were a little more raw if you catch my drift. Far more unpleasant- Oh!”

HotGuy was off in his own little world, and very clearly didn’t notice Cub flinch at the sudden noise. Honestly, Cub couldn’t even tell if he was looking at him.

“I’ll tell you at lunch! You’ll come to lunch with me, won’t you?”

Cub struggled to do much more than gape and gesture uselessly, and he wasn’t entirely sure if HotGuy understood what was happening, but he definitely recognized there was a problem, brows furrowed in concentrated thought. Finally, he clicked his tongue.

“I’ll give you the address! I’ll write it down,” HotGuy pulled a small notebook out of his pocket, humming to himself, before lighting back up, “And my number! Just in case you can’t make it. Or don’t want to come. You don’t have to come. But I really want you to! If you don’t come though you should text me. You don’t have to text me. But I’d really like if you texted me. Or call me! You don't have to call me. How does 1:00 sound?”

Cub stared, which apparently HotGuy took as a resounding yes, as he continued writing, just about as happy as can be. He tore the page out of his notepad then set it on Cub’s desk, patting it a couple times before turning right around with an enthusiastic wave, “Byeee!”

Cub scrambled to his feet, opening his mouth to say literally anything, but speech still wasn’t working out for him, and HotGuy was practically already out the front door. His manager was similarly speechless, but more in the normal way rather than the Cub way, so baffled, she wasn’t even wearing her signature customer service smile.

“Are you okay?” she surprised him with that, her tone far more gentle than he had expected, especially after a complete disaster. But she did look worried, and now that he thought a little harder about it, he had to guess he wasn’t looking so great. But Cub couldn’t say as much, so instead he ducked into the back room, returning with the note HotGuy had left for him.

Her eyes widened as she read it, complete disbelief evident in every feature on her face. Cub wasn’t sure why she was so surprised, he had no doubt she heard every word HotGuy said to him, but regardless, she returned the note, near silent.

“You should go.” She must have seen the distaste on Cub’s face before he even knew it was there, shaking her head, “You have to go. This- Cub! That’s HotGuy!” This was not in the least bit convincing, but his manager was a bit too distracted to notice. Honestly, he didn’t mind all that much. It was a little nice to be talked to like a friend. “Go, go on, rest up. Take as much time as you need, but if you don’t make it by 1:00 you’d better text him. Then tell me everything. He likes you, Cub!”

He wasn’t entirely sure how to respond to that, so he simply didn’t.

Cub sighed through his nose as he turned around, fully intending on taking that break, but not on going to lunch. Lunch with a random famous guy was the last thing he wanted right now- god, and he’d kill for a nap. He frowned, but stopped short when he saw his desk, or rather, the little package on top of his desk. The visor screen- damn it.

It was HotGuy’s fault he had forgotten about it, but maybe it wasn’t, maybe it was Cub’s fault for making a complete fool of himself- HotGuy must have felt obligated to comfort him, surely. Embarrassing. Mortifying, even. If Cub never had to face the world again, it would be too soon.. But it would probably be responsible of him to actually give HotGuy the visor he came for in the first place. A proper apology.

He sat with a huff, eyeing the note with a creased frown. Yup, there was the name and address of the place HotGuy wanted to meet him, his number, and-

Cub dropped the little sheet of paper, then nearly fell out of his chair trying to catch it.

‘And HotGuy is a little much as far as names go, so please, call me Scar.’

[therealgchu]

Snippet Sunday

i'd forgotten it was snippet sunday!

going to post up a VERY ROUGH bit of writing. i'd started this a long time ago, was thinking of doing it as a vignette, but changed my mind, and is now going to be part of the next chapter. but, i've got a lot of changing to do.

this won't be published this saturday; instead i'll put up a vignette idea that's been floating around in my head based on jonathan coulton's you ruined everything song.

if you want to read To the Shore from the beginning, go here!

sneaky with the peeky

“I’m not leaving until we have this out,” Sam said, planting his feet in front of her. Hwa continued to stare at the floor. It was almost like she wasn’t even present in the room. “I thought we’d worked this stuff out a long time ago. What is going on?” Hwa turned, grabbed her old haversack, opened the safe and started dumping books into it. “What are you doing?”

“Leaving,” she said, not looking up. “I don’t belong here. I never belonged here. This was all a mistake.”

“What are you talking about?” he asked, following her around the room. A pit opened in his stomach as he started to understand what she was doing. “Hwa, you had a fight with Cora. I shouldn’t have shouted, but when it comes to her, I go into protective dad-mode.” Sam said in a softer voice. “Stop, just,” he tried to grab her arm, but she dropped low to the floor and instead grabbed empty air.

She crawled under the bed and prized up the floorboard. She dragged out her food stash and started shoving that in the haversack Some of the food fell out.

He’d never really spent any time in her room before. He stared at the couple of Chunks packages that had fallen. The sight of the food derailed his train of thought, “Why do you have food stashed under there?” he asked. Hwa didn’t respond, stood up and went around the bed, stuffing her plushies in the bag. She then zipped up the haversack and headed to the door.

He caught her and stood in her way. With his foot he caught the door and slammed it shut. “Oh no, you’re not getting out that easy. Not until we have this out.” He grabbed the bag out of her hands. “Now, talk.” 

Hwa sat down on the floor, again staring at nothing. Sam sat down on the easy chair in front of her and glared. They sat for several minutes in silence. He looked at the contents of the haversack, books, food, and plushies? What the hell, he thought. He knew she had some expensive equipment in that safe, yet she grabbed junk. Food hid under the bed? What the hell…oh shit, goddammit, when it hit him. During his time with the Rangers he’d seen behavior like that before. They liberated a spacer sex trafficking ring and he was there when they liberated the building where they imprisoned the people. When news came of the liberation, the people pulled up the floorboards and showed the Rangers where they hid food and what few sentimental and valuable things they managed to save. Oh god, he thought when the realization came crashing down.

“Hwa, just tell me what happened, ok?” he asked in a much gentler tone.

If possible, she appeared even smaller than she was. “She said she wanted to be like me,” Hwa whispered, still not making eye contact.

“What?” he asked.

“Like me. Cora said she wanted to be like me. I told her she should never want to be me.”

Sam shook his head perplexed. “Of course Cora looks up to you, you’re her captain. I don’t understand.”

“I was ten when I killed my first person. I was a lookout on a drug deal, and I saw a Ryujin guard headed towards us. I got up high, then got the drop on him. They don’t give kids guns, wouldn’ta been able to handle the kick-back, anyway. But, the knives they gave us were real sharp. I cut his throat from ear to ear, through his trachea and esophagus. I’ve always been freakishly strong. Never even made a sound. I even got promoted after that.”

Sam inhaled sharply, momentarily shocked by Hwa’s confession. He was having a hard time reconciling the woman before him to the story she told. He honestly thought that she just did a lot of hacking or lock picking. While she’d told him that she was a trained killer, the reality of what that actually meant hadn’t sunk in. But, it made sense how she was so good in a fire-fight. He’d never met anyone as calm and cool as she. She evinced no emotion when she fought. She might as well have been going to the grocery store for as mundane it seemed to her. Like she’d done a million times for years…which is what it exactly was.

[skymaiden32]

Negotiations

Read on AO3 here

Fandom: Thunderbirds

Tagging: @dragonoffantasyandreality @thundergeek59 @janetm74 @katblu42 @liseylou @amistrio @uniwolfcorn (Please ask if you would like to get alerts when I update or post new stories.)

Thundertober Day 3: Armour

Alan thinks they may have gone a little too far with the armour on his uniform.

Continuity: TAG

------

“Are you sure I need all of this…?” Alan asked, still a little uncertain as he waddled out of the fitting room. 

“Yes.” His four older brothers and grandmother in front of him chorused, causing Alan to grumble. 

He huffed. “I can barely move in this thing.” He was only vaguely able to gesture at the full body armour currently situated over his uniform. “And it’s really heavy…”

Scott grinned. “Good. That means it’ll work.” 

“Yep.” Virgil nodded. “Some of Brains’ finest work, if I do say so!”

“Plus,” John cut in. “Everything feels lighter in space anyway. It’s perfect for Thunderbird 3 missions.”

Alan sighed. “That still doesn’t mean it’s good for missions on Earth, Johnny…”

“Sure it does.” The older astronaut argued. “You’ll be on Thunderbird 2’s support crew; you need heavy duty stuff for that.” As an afterthought, he muttered, “And don’t call me Johnny.”

Gordon nodded in agreement. “When I tell you about all the scrapes and bruises me and Virg have gotten just for handling some of that equipment…”

“Yeah!” Alan tried to protest. “But you guys weren’t given full body armour to wear!��� At that moment, Kayo walked into the room. The Tracy’s watched as their adoptive sister took one look at Alan, and immediately had to stifle a giggle. Alan frowned. “See? She thinks it’s too much. Hell, Brains probably thinks it’s too much! You guys are being way too overprotective…”

“And is there anything wrong with that young man?” Grandma Tracy interrupted. “Your brothers and I just want to make sure you’re safe…”

“I know but…” Alan sighed. “Maybe we can compromise on it? I don’t need this much armour.”

“Alright kiddo,” Scott took charge of negotiations. “What do you wanna get rid of?”

Alan smiled innocently. “Is everything an option?”

Scott deadpanned. “No.”

“Eh. It was worth a shot.” The teen shrugged. “I’ll wear the shoulder pieces. Honestly, I think they make me look cool.” He admitted.

His older brother hummed. “Wear the chestplate too and we’ll call it even.” He held his hand out. “So, Mr Tracy, do we have a deal?”

Alan was quiet for a good few minutes. On one hand, he could try to get just a bit more out of this. On the other hand, Scott was serious about this. All of them were. And when someone in his family was serious, it meant they weren’t messing around. Scott wouldn’t budge. He never did when it came to safety. Alan smirked, reaching his hand out to accept Scott’s. “We do indeed…” The teen winked. “Mr Tracy…”

Scott rolled his eyes as he let go of Alan’s hand, pulling him into a hug and ruffling his hair. He was glad Alan had agreed to at least part of the armour, because if anything happened to him, he'd never forgive himself for not convincing him to wear more of it…

[welovemonstergirls]

My thoughs on the recent Skullgirls censorship

Okay. So. I’m not the kind of guy that’s gonna call anyone a pedophile or a neo nazi or a racist for raising a fuss at the devs cutting out what they did.

I am, however, the kind of guy that’s gonna call everyone that’s throwing a conniption fit over a few cosmetic changes that effect NOTHING in the grand scheme of the game a pathetic, whiny, entitled crybaby BITCH for being so outraged about absolute NON-ISSUES.

What are you losing from not being able to stare at Filia’s ass in that one cutscene anymore? What’s being lost because they removed some armbands from the Egrets? This doesn’t make SENSE. All they changed was minor cosmetic stuff!

Filia’s panty shots? Who cares?! They’re not cutting out any of the stuff that makes people like the game, she’s still baring her midriff and wearing a belt in place of a skirt, that hasn’t changed! The sexualized stuff is still there! So Cerebella was censored in a FEW story shots where she’s in a non-consentinal situation where she’s literally about to be murdered or eaten, she’s still flashing her underwear in her actual gameplay! Parasoul, Ms. Fortune, Valentine, Eliza and Black Dahlia are all RIGHT THERE! Your precious sexual content hasn’t gone ANYWHERE, so this entire complain is just WORTHLESS and PATHETIC. You can’t handle the game being two percent less horny so you need to get all up in arms and review bomb the game in an active effort to hurt it because of some minor changes?!

The Egrets armbands make perfect sense! Maybe when the game was initially pitched they were meant to be something more Nazi-esque, but that simply isn’t the case anymore! EVERY time we see the Egrets in the modern age, they are portrayed as GOOD GUYS. Parasoul is a righteous ruler that genuinely wants to do what’s best for her people, and the men she leads are the only people in power that are FIGHTING FOR THE PEOPLE. They don’t want to have their biggest force of GOOD associated with LITERAL NAZI SYMBOLISM. Why is that such a hard thing for people to grasp?! I keep saying people claim that the Egrets are supposed to be the bad guys. No the fuck they’re not, what are you even watching to think that?!

Big Band’s story mode, that I can kinda get, it was very important to his overall character, that is the one thing I won’t fault anyone for being upset over. At the same time though, I get why they did it. It’s a very topical issue that they don’t personally feel well equipped to handle, and it’s possibly a bit too real for their fun action fighting game where a cartoon character fights a ninja nurse. I don’t agree with this choice, but I can understand it.

 The concept art... I can also kiiiiind of get, I feel like if they’re gonna delete guest art they can at least replace it with new ones so that the fans are still getting SOMETHING out of it, but I can see what prompted the change. Like, them wanting to censor the fanservice on Filia and JUST Filia is not a big deal! If you don’t want to play the game with both hands, just pick Parasoul or Valentine ffs. And how often do you even go into the art gallery to look at images you can just as easily get online? This is another non-issue that doesn’ have anything to do with the game itself.

Finally, the Soviet Announcer voice pack. ...That voice pack was literally voiced by their fucking ABUSER. I can understand them wanting the voice of someone that hurt them OUT of the game they’re working on. Even if they got a different guy to voice it, it’s still a bit that was MADE by their abuser, Mike Z used it in his tutorials for Tager and Potemkin and it became a running gag. That voice pack is a literal reminder of someone who hurt them. So stop crying about “Muh soviet russia pack doh!” and accept the fact that they don’t want to hear his voice because it brings back painful memories for them. It’s not that hard. And as for Ben’s alternate voice pack? It’s literally based around sexual misconduct. So yeah.

I’m just pissed off that my favorite franchise of all time is suffering because some entitled, whiny little puke stains can’t handle minute changes that effect next to NOTHING about the game itself. Like a few cosmetic differences is the absolute end of the world. If you’re like that and you’re reading this? Stop crying like a little bitch, put on your big boy pants and accept the fact that these changes are LAUGHABLY MINOR. The designs are still the same. The story is still the same. The gameplay is still the same. The characters are still the same. The art style is still the same. EVERYTHING THAT MATTERS IS THE SAME. WHO. CARES?!

[dangerously-human]

I was right a year ago, and I was right again now even though I told myself I was being foolish and immediately moved past my suspicion, because why wouldn't I when I was directly told otherwise?

Which is to say: the young whippersnapper asked me out today, after our hike. Sort of. He had written me a letter, and read it, so it was a bit more of a dramatic confession than anything else - but to be fair, that's definitely the vibe I was stuck on with crushes in my early twenties too. It kicked off with "I know we both know I was lying when I said this wasn't what I was trying to do last year," and I had to stop him to say no, I did not know that. That's the one piece of this that does bother me, because I agonized over that misunderstanding, I blamed myself for thinking way too highly of myself and reading the situation wrong, and I would have made different - more careful - choices had I known over the last year that he did have a crush on me. I stopped being cautious not to lead him on, but I don't think I can feel guilty when I was operating off of the information I'd been given. But aside from that, it was fine, and just like last time, I'm glad we cleared the air. I told him I was proud of him for trying, said I've only ever managed to do that outright once and it's hard, but I froze when he asked when because I do not want to encourage the jealousy factor I sense still simmering between him and the adventurer even a year past me resolving my own crush, so I said that was a story for another time, maybe - but at least I have a very good track record of keeping/getting back to normal with these friendships that had this complicating factor in one direction or another. That was apparently part of his worry, that I've been talking more about moving, whether that's the Ireland fellowship or just trying somewhere else for a year, and I "graduate" from young adults Bible study this summer, and he was a little scared of losing me. So again, I pointed out that I've got a good track record of maintaining friendships even when we don't share the same context anymore. He was respectful about everything, not at all pushy (just a tad dramatic), only objecting to my point from last year about the age gap - which I stand by, but it's not the only reason this wouldn't work for me, it was just the easiest one to say quickly last time around.

It feels a little messy, honestly - I'm genuinely surprised Bible study bestie managed not to give anything away when we were talking dating stuff last night (she helped me set up a dating app profile, which is a whole other challenge I feel far less equipped to deal with, if I'm being honest), since the young whippersnapper asked her and her husband for advice, so they were already in the loop. Which makes it easier, doesn't it, I can process with BSB without having to really catch her up on much. These things happen, in friend groups, where everyone's kind of involved to varying degrees. And partially it's a bit flattering, really. But I'm not going to date someone where I'd be the spiritual leader in the relationship, or the more mature in just about every way (among other reasons). I guess the good thing about functionally having this discussion split across a year like this is he's grown a ton in the meantime, so I don't think I hurt him nearly as badly as I would have before. And while I'm frustrated that he lied to me, we did end up with a closer friendship than I would have allowed otherwise, and it's a good one. I just... it's a lot, I guess. More for him than me, obviously. And I hope I handled it with grace.

(But there's a part of me that's yelling I TOLD YOU SO, too. Even in the midst of awkwardness, dang do I appreciate the vindication of being right.)

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #128

So… I have good news and bad news!

I will start with the good news! J and I are not dead! We're not even slightly injured! Yay!

The bad news is that the plane is pretty ah… pretty banged up. It's not totaled or anything; it's definitely repairable and J has insurance for it, so it's really not the end of the world. I can't show you any pictures yet, because J asked me not to (something about legality and insurance???), but I have them. Maybe I'll post them up tomorrow.

As for what happened... to my inexperienced eyes, it looked like J was going in for a landing. We've done this like a million times before; it was going as per usual. Until it wasn't. For reasons I don't understand, the plane started veering to the left and leaving the runway, and J couldn't get it to stop doing that, also for reasons I don't understand.

A bunch of rapid-fire decisions were made in order to avoid colliding into buildings or into other vehicles. He tried to get the plane to go back into the sky, but it wouldn't go up; it remained on the ground. So then he aimed it towards open spaces. When it still wouldn't stop, he aimed for the treeline.

Fortunately, by the time we reached the trees, the plane had slowed down a decent amount, and the trees were young and still relatively bendy and forgiving. J also thought to get a special harness for the seatbelt to go over our shoulder and chest beforehand, and it was a really good call for him to have made; planes come equipped only with little lap belts, and if we had just stuck with that instead of getting the harness, we might have ended up being thrown forward and mashing our heads on the controls.

In the end, for us, it just felt like if you're in a car and you slam on the brakes suddenly. We were rocked and shaken, but not in any way injured. Because J saw to our safety ahead of time and was able to make good decisions even when the shit hit the fan, we lived. Stuff like this isn't normally something people get to walk away from unscathed.

It was an amazing combination of luck, prior planning, and skill on J's part that allowed us to remain unharmed. My faith in J and his ability to pilot a plane has not wavered. In fact, if anything, I trust him even more than I did before; now I am certain that if something unexpected happens, he can STILL keep us safe, because I just got done watching him do it, and the way he handled it was AMAZING. I couldn't be more proud of him!

A short while later, a bunch of police folks and some firefighters showed up, as well as some staff from the airport to make sure we were okay. It was a lot of people in our vicinity generally, and it was a lot to deal with, but I dealt with it on my own until J was able to emotionally recover enough deal with it; understandably, he was shaken far worse than I was. But we got it sorted out. Answered some questions. J filled out some insurance form. People gave us lots of kindness and reassurance along the way. The manager of the airport drove us to a nearby hotel. All things considered, everything is fine.

Of course, we're still very shaken. Both of us had a fuckton of adrenaline surge through our bodies. My hands are still shaking and my chest is tight and trembling as I write this. But we're okay, so don't worry. It's just adrenaline, and adrenaline can't hurt us by itself.

So... we're not home yet. We're at some other place because we thought it prudent to stop the plane to get gas. We're about 2 hours away from home by car. And what's more, we have to stay overnight here in order to deal with insurance stuff in the morning. Then I suppose we'll ask M or Br or both to come fetch us from here.

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but whatever it is, I'm sure we'll figure it out. Even for big scary stuff like this, the solution, ultimately, is to just take things one step at a time.

On the bright side, I was able to snag you a bunch of really great pictures today! I love taking pictures of beautiful things for you, and I love showing you my world! Here, please enjoy these extra, because they were hard-won, and also because if things had turned out differently than they did, I might never have gotten a chance to share these with you, and that would have been sad, because I DID A GOOD JOB WITH THESE:

...I love my planet. I hope that if I show you enough pictures of it, maybe you could like it, too. I certainly love yours. And I love you, too, just in case you forgot. But I hope you don't forget, because part of the whole reason I write these letters is so that you can remember that you are loved by someone, somewhere, not for what you look like or for what you can do, but for who you are as a human being.

Oh, oh, oh!! And!! Today!! In the hangar before we left! J and the flight instructor practiced landing and flying and taking off for 2 or 3 hours before we headed home. So I chilled in the hangar with music by myself, and these two old men came in, and one of them spoke to me for some reason, which wasn't bad. But! I had my earphones in, so I had to ask him to pardon me and repeat himself.

Well, he was all like, "Yeah, get those things out of your ears!" in the same way that cranky old men generally like to do when people younger than them use technology. And you know? The version of me who existed prior to the letters I wrote to myself probably would have cowered and said, "I'm sorry sir."

BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT I DID TODAY!!! 🤩🤩🤩

Instead, I looked at him square in the face and said, "Excuse me, but I'm an adult human woman and you don't get to tell me what to do. Would you like to try again?" And!! Oh!! Sephiroth!!! I think he expected me to be all meek and submissive, because the shocked "Oh fuck!" look on his face was ABSOLUTELY!! PRICELESS!! And he spluttered for a bit before finally introducing himself properly! I was really glad that he tried again. But I think he was a bit too embarrassed about how rude he was before to interact with me much further than that; I'm not too sad about that, though.

...I wonder if you'd be proud of me. I mean... if you could read any of this, and if you've been able to read any of the stuff I've written so far. I wonder if you could see how much I've been learning and growing and trying to get out from under the oppressive thumb of the memories I carry. I wonder if you'd be proud. And I wonder if you'd use my growth as inspiration for your own.

I'm pretty tired, so I think I'm going to stop writing now.

I love you. And I'll write again tomorrow. Please stay safe.

Your friend, Lumine

[lake-archive]

Chapter 48 - A Beast

AO3 Link

Characters: Annette 'Ann' Dorste-Hülshoff (OC), Osamu Dazai, Doppo Kunikida, Unnamed male character (Friend's OC)

Words: 1,672

Previous Chapter - Masterlist - Next Chapter

All this pondering inside their head… The thing said not leaving it. Honestly, they knew that they were being very risky here. They had heard it several times, some type of scolding. 

“Don’t involve yourself in the business of the Armed Detective Agency. That’s our business. You’re not trained nor equipped to handle stuff like that.” – So Dazai every single time, one of the few times he would put on a more serious face towards Ann and tell them off. Everytime he would leave for a mission. How did they know? Well, easy. He said it every time he was heading out somewhere else and would not be back at the usual time. It was as if to reassure them, to not worry about him when he was away. 

‘He would come back, this was not the first time he dealt with this stuff.’ They would try to get themself to agree. They would try to calm down based on those words. They would try to put themself at ease. And yet something would always linger within. Something was always putting them at some type of doubt. And their ‘other self’ the nights before? They would usually not make it any better.

“Of course this man would run his mouth dry.” Annette would scoff usually whenever Ann would tell them about it. “He will be alive today. But what about tomorrow? It always lingers in your mind, doesn’t it?”

They were never told flatout what to do and what not to do. Even when they had asked what they were supposed to do… All Annette did was shrug it off quickly. “I do not know.” Every single time. Were they encouraging Ann or were they just trying to plant false seeds? They claimed to be ‘them’ yet they were not someone Ann could figure out so easily if at all. Their blank expressions especially made it difficult to read them. They didn’t know what this one was aiming for, why the time was spent in such a way. It was something they just couldn’t figure out. Nor would they figure it out anytime soon most likely. Though if the goal was to plant seeds of fear and doubt…

Then it sure had done wonders. Because Ann decided to ignore Dazai’s words that morning. Just when he had left the apartment and Ole had drifted to his nap they had snuck right outside and followed along. Though it took lots of hiding and sneaking, even having to hurry inside the back of a car to drive along, hiding as if they were luggage. It was there where they had overheard a little more.

“So so, where’s our trip today~?”

“It’s not a trip you idiot!”

“Same thing, isn’t it? Are we going to see something super fun?”

“Take this mission more seriously, will you? Anyways, we’re going to this facility to retrieve this ‘werewolf’ the scientist spoke of.”

“Scientis? Not some old geezer?”

“Oh you get the point! Squeezing the information out of him was a bit of a pain… Do you even know who we’re dealing with here?”

“A big, scary werewolf!”

“An Ability user!”

“Oh? You don’t say. You really had to ask the old man for that?”

“Can you just sit back and listen already!?”

The two men who were conversing, one was Dazai and the other was Kunikida. Looks like it was a mission for the two, a quick one at that. Everything falling into place, a little too quickly. Even Dazai had pointed it out. It was as if this scientist wanted someone to clean up for them quickly and swiftly.

To cut a long conversation short however it was rather simple, at least from what Ann had overheard – An artificial Ability user had gone rampage. Apparently this person was used for several experiments for around three years. Yet not too long ago they snapped and a beast broke out, slaughtering everything and everyone in its way. Once it smelled you or you were in its sight you were pretty much done for. It would be quicker, either massacring you or eating you alive. The scientist inside the office had been one of the lucky ones to escape the scene and perhaps was the only survivor. Experimenting on a person though… Then again apparently it was not uncommon underground. People could be that twisted and in pursuit of more power… Still… 

Then again, that was what the two had been talking about. Of course the validity of these claims had to be checked. “But if it’s really a person running rampant we’re not going to turn a blind eye.” Kunikida had said.

“Hey, I wasn’t even close to thinking that.” Dazai had said, though having let out a slight laughter at that. 

Though as for how this ‘beast’ was identified… There was a description available, though a vague one.

‘The beast usually stands on two legs mostly yet sometimes would also use all four. It was at least able to do just that. It is massive, imagine a polar bear massive, even when standing on its two legs. The eyes may glow at night, as intense as any dog’s. Sharp claws and teeth, described as razor sharp. When it opens its mouth one may spot the teeth, almost an equivalent of stairs. The fur in itself seems colorless, gray mixed with some black, though one may describe it as the standard wolf fur.’

Overall it was a… Sight. Yet it helped as Ann knew what to look out for when walking around themself. It wouldn’t take long anyways for the car to park and the two men exiting it shortly after. When no longer hearing them they also decided to exist, falling right outside, onto the ground. And finally they got a sight onto the building, the facility in question.

Though it looked run down, barely resembling a building. The roof was missing, the walls cracked and it seemed to be at the brink of collapsing. The walls are close to cracking, as if something or someone had blown up most of them. The ones at the higher level at least were completely gone. But that was just the sight on the outside… The inside was its own can of worms.

Just when taking one step in there Ann had to stop, noticing that they had stepped on something. It wasn’t anything fleshy or bloody yet equally as terrifying. And it wasn’t even that deep into the building. They had bonked against it with the tip of their shoes, making them kick it aside. It was a hollow sound, as if kicking a stick. But it couldn’t have been… Curiosity had gotten the better of them and they lifted their gaze down… Only to be greeted with the sight of a bone being kicked. And when they turned their gaze to where it was coming from they just stood there for a moment, staring in disbelief.

Right in the corner was something. The flesh had been completely devoured and only a messy pile of bones remained. It was barely recognizable, everything but the skull. And the skull was not one of an animal, no… It was that of a human. 

Their legs froze. They had read of imagery regarding human remains as well as drawn images but actually seeing something like that… They didn’t know how to react. It had just been lying there. The bones were licked clean, their stomach twisting at the thought of it. They could only imagine what had happened right then and there… And the images forming in their head made them want to throw up. Who would do such a thing!? Was this… There was no way… Right? 

And yet their legs shook for a moment, taking in the sight for longer than anticipated, longer than they probably should have. Yet they knew that they had to continue moving. This was a little unnerving. Maybe this was a bad idea… They could always sneak outside and sneak inside the car, wait until it would turn back and… And… 

Ann looked around all of a sudden, their eyes scanning the area for a short moment. Wait… These were empty hallways, yeah. And… It all looked the same. Where had they been going actually? They couldn’t tell. It was all broke, no sign readable any longer. And the windows all broke down. Not just that but the doors… All run over yet looking the exact same. The dirt all over made it even more difficult to tell where they were. Though one step forward and a small hole would break down in front of them, making them stop right then and there and look down… Only to notice that they may have walked upstairs, enough to have their stomach twist at the height. And now they just noticed that they were walking on dusty, shaky ground. But they were also lost. Uh… This was a stupid idea. But they got a little too ahead of themself, thinking that it couldn’t be so bad. What had overcome them actually!? Ugh, this was infuriating.

“I… Should just find my way back and—” Though they were interrupted all of a sudden, a loud howl echoing through the halls. So much that said walls shook and they noticed dust falling down. And then they heard loud steps. Wait, was that— 

It overcame them, knowing that they had to leave. Even if it was just a regular animal it was too scary to think about! They could not risk it! However, just before they were attempting to flee to wherever, the next best place they could think of, they suddenly fell over. Usually they would quickly get up yet something just… Stopped them. yeah, it all stopped. 

And before they could even attempt doing so they heard the wall cracking on the right… Only for it to be crushed into pieces right after, having them turn to the side and look at the sight in terror. 

Th… That is…

Previous Chapter - Masterlist - Next Chapter

[spoiledlemonsbiggestfan]

SORRY I DISAPPEARED

Hello there! It has been way too long since i updated you guys on how i've been doing, and i've probably only got myself to blame on this one. But i have FANtastic news to share! (get it? Cus i'm fan? Genious, i know.) I finally managed to get a job! And a decent one this time, no more cleaning mediocre school halls for me! (Horrayyy!)

So this entire hiatus hasnt been for nothing, i've been very hard at work finally being able to persue the thing i love the most, writting! Now i can officially call myself a journalist instead of an amature blogger. The self-improvement sure is real, love to see it. Sadly, I am constantly restricted from putting my heart and soul onto the paper in favor of transmitting what could be classified as useless information to whoever is bored enough to watch the news. And that constant restrain has made me miss the days of the good ol' Fan blog, so i guess you could say that's the reason i'm here. I've missed writting whatever i want to without the need to always double or triple check my work, its fun to not worry if every single word i type fits into my current streams of thought and stuff like that. But you don't wanna hear about all of that do you? You wanna hear about the funny stories! The authentic work experience i have gained! Atleast i hope so, because if not then youre probably in the wrong blog. But if that IS what you came here for, bluckle up bukaroo because im about to tell all about the working woes and friendly foes!

First off the job aplication process was VERY off-putting, my 2 future bosses took care of the interview and they asked... odd questions. They were also always a little too...rude. But thats ok! Nothing that i havent already handled. On the job i have met some interesting personalities such as suitcase! (I was given permission to state her name, duh) suitcase is very kind and funny, but she also has social anxiety, which is weird considering she is one of the few reporters we have, the type that usually goes out, interviews others and deals with harsh weather conditions for some reason. Suitcase is always busy going from one place to another so she can grab the needed fotage, and since im normally the one who writtes her scripts, i get to go with her sometimes! The news channel utilises this totally not ominous and cramped mini-van to cary all of the needed equipment and people. Surprisingly enough, my supervisor is the one who drives the van! She's quite chill, her voice is so smooth that i have to stop myself from yawning when i'm around her. Dont get on her bad side though, i once saw her almost yell at our make-up artist. Speaking of that, they both have some weird relationship going on, i genuinely have no idea if they are friends or enemies and at this point i am too scared to ask suitcase about it.

Working there is pretty chill, i tecnically dont need to phisically be there but hey, a bit more of social interaction wouldnt hurt. Besides, i wouldnt have met suitcase if i only sent my scripts via e-mail! So its a win-win! What else do i have to say abt work? Hmmm.... oh yea! I have a funny story to share!

On my first few days, suitcase told me that the make-up artist was an extreme chatter-box that preferably likes to "spill the tea" on everyone. But if you've been following this blog for a while now, you'd know that im not really good with understanding these types of frases, so for the longest time i thought that this guy actually spilled tea on people on porpose. (he looks really refined, so i just assumed he would be the kind of guy to like tea) So i, being extremelly cautious to not get tea on my lovely red paper, avoided him for like 5 days straight! He eventually caught on and complained to suitcase about it, she then told me so, and i explained my conundrum to her. After she explained what the frase actually meant, we couldnt stop laughting! I never actually apologised to the guy, i sure hope he doesnt hold grudges!

[nature-nerd-sarah]

it's your turn! Narrativise your life! Find a moment that has the core of a novel you'd read and then MAKE IT SO

I've thought about it, and barring any stuff that I should really talk through with a therapist first (the Dutch healthcare system is so overtaxed and understaffed that I probably never will), I think my first year of uni could be pretty good.

Get into uni to study biology. My first ever relationship ended in a break-up near the end of summer vacation, and I have pretty bad social anxiety, but whatever. I'm gonna try my best to make a new life in uni.

Rent a room from a private landlord. It's small and has no outside windows. The only sunlight comes from a window into the hallway, which has an outside window. Whatever.

Dutch unis have a thing called "introduction week", where new students get sorted in groups to do activities during the day and parties at night. I start drifting away from most of my introduction group pretty much as soon as introduction is over. We were just randomly sorted anyway.

I do end up becoming friends with three of them, E1, B1, and L1. Too lazy to think up fake names, so you're just getting the first letter of the first name, and a number if there's more than one person with that letter.

Also met a girl at a camping trip during summer, M1, and we kind of stay in touch. I feel attracted to her, but don't realise this is an after-effect of the break-up.

A new housemate moves in, D1. He complains whenever stuff gets to loud for him, which is anything above a whisper after 6pm, and anything above normal talking during the day. He sometimes starts banging doors and shouting because you're too loud.

I hang out with E1, B1, and L1 at uni for a while, start getting closer and eventually start dating M1, and try not to get into D1's way at home.

At some point, B1 and L1 pair up for a uni assignment. Bad idea. They're too different in how they work, end up fighting, and the friend group falls apart.

Start getting second thoughts about dating M1 around this time too. She's... a difficult person to deal with, and I'm not equipped to handle all that.

At some point, the landlord is having some work done to the bathroom. It's pretty necessary work, but very noisy. D1 attacks the workman over this. They beat each other up pretty badly, and the landlord kicks D1 out.

Meanwhile, I start hanging out with another friend group at uni, an introduction group that did actually stay together. E2, D2, B2, M2, E3, L2, and L3. L1 also hangs out with them, because she's becoming toxic bffs with E2.

I realise I can't with M1 anymore. She really is too much for me to handle. At the time I have some weird superiority complex about breaking up with her, in hindsight I feel bad for using her to get over a previous relationship. Such is life, I guess.

I realise a studymate, D3, lives near my house. I greet him in the way to uni one day, and we end up going together a lot. We also meet up for drinks sometimes.

The friend group I'm hanging out with is becoming pretty toxic. L2 and L3 are talked about barely behind their backs for being too lovey-dovey of a couple. Truth is they're both autistic, and L2 has some pretty bad anxiety that L3 is helping her with.

I at some point mention that I'm bi to this group. I didn't think it was even that remarkable, but they do. I feel a real shift in how they treat me going forward. Especially E2 and L1 become much colder towards me.

I end up hanging out with D3 at uni more as well. Also with his friends M3, N, and T. They're all pretty cool. L2 and L3 start hanging out with us more too, because we're not being shitty about them being lovey-dovey.

I go for drinks with D3 and L3, and the friendship is really cemented. We make a group chat, and start doing most of our assignments together.

This all happened in a little over a year. That final friend group (D3, L2, L3, M3, N, and T) has been my stable group of uni friends for 8 years now. They're the ones I recently came out to as trans.

[matoitech]

the bot fighting thing you've got going on for zag seems really interesting, do you mind elaborating on it when you get the chance?? :0 is it a fun sport or is it like, an actual harmful thing in that society

yeah id love to elaborate, thanks for asking :D i havent like sat down and figured out how it for sure functions yet so this stuff is all subject 2 change, its just kinda how i was thinking of it as i was making him, but i think like whether its a fun sport or whether its harmful depends on where its held and what kind of bot fighting it is!

zag was in an official bot fighting league that was more like wrestling or MMA fighting (its 'realer' than wrestling but they play it up in a similar way). its broadcasted and you can buy tickets to go watch it in stadiums, its probably a pretty big thing in that society (human wrestling or MMA fighting does still exist, but bot fighting can have different appeals) he was probably somewhat well known in circles of robot fans and human fans Of robots and bot fighting. the company who created and contracted him tried to play down him exiting the league bcuz he was kind of viewed like an embarrassment and they had no idea how to handle him (i mean their entire company model of a womens robot fighting league relies on selling this incredibly silly view of gender, with ROBOTS, so yeah they were not equipped to deal w his existence) so he kind of just disappeared once the season was over and no one knew what happened to him for a while. but i digress!

whether its just a sport or legitimately harmful also depends how the actual robot character views it- zags career was harmful to him in a sense of his own personal identity, and that was a big part of why he was happy leaving- as well as it just taking a toll on his body, and theres certain things robots cant rly fix unless they have good money to change the entire way their like base is built and not just their visual plating. but while the companies probably had shady business practices it wasnt REALLY back alley shit, which DOES exist.

i think its similar to our world in the sense that we have different kinds of fighting considered a sport and ones that r illegal, dangerous, and more back alley (esp things like dogfighting or cockfighting) i think its very likely theres a lot shadier companies or just teams of people building bots to beat the shit out of each other in more 'underground' battle rings but zag wasnt in that world. he might have fought in some robot-ran underground rings after he exited professional botfighting to make some cash now and then (who knows tho, he'd never tell you if he did) but as far as his personal backstory goes i think it was more harmful emotionally than in the society. that might change tho cuz im tempted by all sorts of different tracks wiht it lol

im not rly sure how robots are viewed by that society and by the humans (slash furries? im not really sure if its a human or anthro populated world lol. prob anthros i know what im about, its just easier to say 'human' vs robot) yet exactly tho, so that will influence a lot of decisions on how harmful bot fighting is in their society, ultimately! im also just not sure how 'violent' even the leagues zag was made 4 were i have 2 figure that out.. i call it wrestling but its gotta be like a lot more violent than that lol

[the-cookie-of-doom]

I've been in nursing school for a year now, and the stress of everything has been seriously wearing me down. After nearly 4 months in clinical being made to feel like an idiot, I find myself doubting my choices more often than not. But then I'll have an interaction with a patient at just the right time to remind me exactly why I'm here, suffering through his god-awful program.

A few weeks ago, a patient my age came in, massive trauma victim. She'd been camping in the mountains for a few days when she crashed an ATV. Honestly, she's lucky to be alive. Her friends had to run 2 miles through the wilderness to get to a payphone and call for help. She'd spent a week in the hospital by the time I met her, when she'd finally asked someone if there was any way we could wash her hair.

The normal system we use is these shower caps that have soap in them, and they're awful. Especially when you have thick, curly hair that's almost down to your waist. Walking into that room, seeing this poor kid who could barely move due to her injuries, my heart just broke. Her hair was so dirty after almost 2 weeks without a proper shower that it looked wet from where I was standing in the door.

Together with another nurse tech, we managed to improvise and figure out how to get her hair washed. The beds aren't made for it, we don't have the equipment for it, and like I said she could barely move. But we made it work. I spent probably an hour and a half carefully washing and combing through her hair with nothing more than a regular barber's comb, until it was completely clean and tangle free, and braided it after so it could stay that way.

Just this week I was able to help another young woman that I wasn't assigned to. I didn't know anything about her situation, but I overheard another of my classmates (her assigned student) tell the nurse tech that she needed help and didn't want him to do it. The nurse tech essentially told him it wasn't her responsibility to accommodate that, she was too busy, and the patient needed to either accept his help or get over it. I overhead, and stepped in to see what was wrong.

When I got to the room, the patient was crying and hyperventilating, couldn't tell me what was going on, and looked overall distraught. I was able to just sit with her for a few minutes to calm her down, find out what was wrong. She was hot and sweaty, needed a new gown/sheets. Understandable, no problem. I went and got the stuff, brought her a cold drink and a fan, got her changed, etc. The whole time she kept apologizing because she didn't know what was wrong with her, she wasn't usually like that, she didn't have anything against the guys it was just too much...

The whole time, that nurse tech from before was with me, too. Despite telling my classmate she didn't have time to deal with it, she almost immediately followed me into the room, kept trying to take over what I was doing, all while looking incredibly frustrated with the patient. Making her feel even worse. Once we were done I got the tech to leave so I could talk with the patient, let her know it's okay, that she was just overwhelmed and it's understandable. I reassured her that we're there to take care of her, she deserves to feel safe and taken care of in the hospital. The whole time, she didn't feel comfortable asking for anything else because of how she was treated before me.

Nursing school focuses on building a therapeutic relationship with patients. We need them to trust us and believe they'll be taken care of. It's easy to say you chose health care because you want to help people, but it's also really easy to lose that compassion. Sometimes you don't realize you're doing it. I don't blame that nurse tech, she really was busy. And when you're a working nurse with multiple patients to care for, you don't always have the time to spend an hour or two washing someone's hair, or handling their emotional breakdown with patience. But I think too often, people don't even try.

These relationship's with patients are exactly what's getting me through the misery of nursing school. I'm not out there curing anyone right now, but I know I'm having a positive impact in people's lives. I'm doing my best to show that you can still trust that when you're in the hospital, during one of the most vulnerable times in your life, someone will be there to take care of you and care for you.

I've worked in health care for two and a half years now. My philosophy has always been to maintain patient dignity above all else. It's so easy to forget the person lying in that bed is still a person, and not just a patient, or a set of tasks that have to get done at a certain time. You can't let yourself forget the care in healthcare.