#theres more life theres more time its fine live with it and continue

[kartana]

I feel so sad this sucks i can't stop thinking about doing everything wrong with v I feel like im gonna cry I hate going to sleep early the day after I stay up it's just hours of laying down with stupid train of thoughts that come at night and I can't sleep I just want to sleep I don't want to feel so awful in the morning I don't want to feel awful right now I wish I could just get my thoughts in order get to the point and cry and be done with it. Nothing is going to change from yesterday to today to tomorrow I will just have been miserable and things won't change because of it I wish the world was kinder I wish the world wasn't so cruel I wish things were different I want to cry and now I can't even feel that anymore.

[moonstruksandco]

⋆｡devil i know 𖦹°⭒˚｡⋆

PROLOGUE ; PLAYING GOD

pairing : mob!stucky x mob!reader

summary : your father risked his life for somebody else, now you have to work for him and his best friend

warnings : eventual smut (hehehehe) ; soft mean bucky (meaner reader) and steve ; hard headed reader with a violence problem ; meaner bucky, colder steve ; classism ; daddy issues ; hella violence ; fem!reader ; trailerpark!reader

a/n : yeeaaaaaaaaaaaaa i'm sort of out of my mind writing this, cuz i have a an unfinished tvd chap in drafts but i couldn't help myself, the daydreams went CRAZZYYYYY and I miss infinity war steve and cap and winter soilder look! this is dedicated to my sun ; reblogs and feedback are loved and appreciated

Its ridiculous

And you think you don’t care.

Well.

Its hard to ease into it, but you still know you should.

He sacrificed himself for someone else.

Took a bullet for someone else.

Someone that was never going to be you.

And now, he’s in front of you.

Not the one striving for his life, the one who got to live.

You know this life well. And you thrive on it. Born to fight, raised to live.

But never for him.

“He told me to watch over you,” He says with his golden hair and beard, looking at you seriously.

His eyes are too blue.

His office, or what he chooses to show face in, is cold. Everything is white or beige. Big open windows behind him, desk and monitor shining on his face.

“So…I have to work? For you. That were his last words?” Before he became a vegetable, you don’t say.

You’re clad in attire that almost didn’t even get you into his floor. Theres an oversized leather jacket draped over the chair next to you, denim skirt, groza strapped right underneath (and another in said jacket), white tank and low top sneakers ;because its blazing outside, obviously. Sweat still sticking, mind the very ventilated room.

You think back;

“I’m just here to see Steve Rogers,” you say to the point of exhaustion to the receptionist - secretary whatever.

You think if she was more gentle and nice about it, you would’ve given her grace. But she wasn’t, and hasn’t.

“Yes, but I told you I’ve spoken to him on the phone, and I’ve shown you the number that I could see you obviously recognized, plus the text he sent to come at this time.”

She rolls her eyes.

You decide you’re going to maim her.

“I’ve heard this all before,” She responds in a bored tone, “If you’re not on the sched-”

You’re beginning to pull out the dagger under your skirt.

A hand stops you.

“She’s fine. Let us up.”

You immediately pull on his wrist in retaliation. You think you’re about to break it, but he meets yours eyes.

Eyes to blue. But ones you don’t recognize.

And he stands by Steve now, hands clasped on his front.

You think he said he said his name was Bucky in the silent elevator.

He continues, “I’m not going to take whats owed to yo-”

“Well, he wanted you to, no?” you finish.

You cross your arms, leaning back slightly in the chair. “Just tell me what you need me to do.”

Steve sighs, look away from you, then back to you. “We need you to keep doing what you do best. But this time, for a cause that matters.”

“And that cause is…?” You sit up, confusion evident.

He stalls, as if confused. “You’re father.”

You slack by down, not amused and definitely not interesting

Steve continues, “Just pretend to be my assistant, do what you do best for him, and I’ll protect you.”

You laugh, a short, bitter sound that echoes in the sterile room. "Protect me?” He must be joking.”I think I’ll be fine without it.”

“You know who your father is, right?”

Your face morph into something close to irration.

Its not Steve, its the other blue eyes, and you look straight into his eyes, Bucky you think, “Did I stutter?”

The tension in the room thickens, Steve interjects, placing his palm up to interrupt whatever his (Bucky?) rebuttal was, “This isn’t just about you. It’s about preventing something bigger.”

Your eyes leave a pair of blues, to meet another;

Steve continues, “No one knows what happened. If they know the state he’s in, or even wher-”

“So what? I play assistant

“Exactly.” His shadow says.

You don’t like Bucky.

“You already have one. The bitchy one.”

Steve sighs, “You’re just a cover. You’ll be doing the real work.”

You lean back again, contemplating. "Fine. But if this goes south, I'm out," you say, standing up grabbing your coat.

Steve nods, "Understood,” He stands up when you do respectfully. We start tomorrow."

You scoff again opening the door to exit, “We start next Monday.”

The door closes behind you with a soft click, leaving Steve and Bucky in a tense silence.

Bucky turns to Steve, "Are you sure about this?"

Steve nods, "She was his right hand” He looks back at the seat you were sat on.”No ones going to do it as best as her.”

⋆｡𖦹°⭒˚｡⋆

working on chap 2 ₍ᐢ. ̫.ᐢ₎

[inamagicalhallucination]

au where atsushi gets hit w/ an ability and is in a coma and is fighting for his life

atsushi has a strong desire to live sure but also thinks that itd just be better (and that he deserves to) if he went and died in a ditch

becuz of this, so close to death, atsushi has little will to fight

mayhaps he's been feeling not good for a while but didnt realize how not good

anyway thats not important whats important is as per the ability he can still observe the world and the ppl he might leave as a ghost of sorts

he's floating around the hospital or following his friends, observing

he watches as kyouka cries holding his body's hand, begging him to fight, begging him to not leave and leave her alone - refusing to leave his side until someone has to take her away

he watches kenji try to pretend every things fine - reassuring anyone who'll listen that atsushi is strong - and talk to atsushi as if he's simply closing his eyes for a bit - seemingly in denial about everything

he watches junichiro alternate between trying to comfort everybody, trying to process everything and having fits of rage and hurt where he screams and yells and completely breaks down

he watches kunikida be there for anyone and everyone and try to continue as normally as he can but always being a little off - a little too slow, a little too tired - but still putting up a front until its just him and atsushi's body and he's apologizing for letting this happen begging atsushi to wake up

he watches dazai's face stay blank the entire time he's there only to drink more and more and get scarier and scarier - visit oda and ask the stone what to do - curse his own ability for not stopping the ability thats hurting atsushi - being too scared to go anywhere near atsushi in the fear that atsushi's regenerational abilities will stop working and he'll hurt even more

he watches ranpo put up a strong face - take on more cases - find the ability user quickly but be unable to find any other way for atsushi to get better other than just getting better - he knows theres no way but still he pushes it becuz there has to be but even the ability user breaks down in a session w/ him and dazai and admits there isnt but there has to be

he watches yosano try and heal him over and over - through her ability and her actual knowledge in being a doctor - watches her stay by his side through everything - there to fix any small inconvenience he may have like a too bright room or a non fluffy pillow, waiting, obsessively checking his vitals

he watches the president hold everyone together - keep the ada floating and offering support to anyone who wants it - watches his face grow more and more tired as he waits - as they all wait - watches him visit atsushi's body and give him updates on whats happening, waiting

he watches naomi fill his room with gifts, keeping a bright smile on her face whenever she enters only for it to drop the second she's far away enough so that when he wakes up he cant see it

watches the clerks take turns visiting him w/ gifts and encouragement, helping the president hold down the agency, while trying to be strong

watches lucy spill hot tea on her hands because she's worrying about him again - watches her get upset and angry when anyone so as much hints that atsushi won't get up - watches her talk to him and try to convince him to wake up

and atsushi grieves becuz of his own lack of understanding on how loved he has become

akutagawa doesn't falter when he learns about atsushi and atsushi kind of wishes he did - when he sees atsushi he doesn't blink or react, simply nods and leaves - and atsushi feels strange at having confirmation that he does not matter much to him - sometimes akutagawa visits - not always and never in a pattern - random and quick visits where he only watches atsushi for a moment before leaving - in the end, atsushi follows him becuz watching the ada and lucy gets too hard - he expects akutagawa to go about his day, atsushi in the back of his mind - maybe a little concern for him as his partner but nothing to fret about

atsushi spends his day with akutagawa wishing he could reach out and touch him and hold im as he watches one of the strongest people he knows give in to their grief and fall apart, with no agency members to see him, no friend there to see what akutagawa surely calls his weakness, only him, atsushi's ghost, and gin's hurried footsteps as she comes home

anyway

why did i write this

[wonder2realities]

as someone who came into the manifestation / LOA space like before the void state and neville goddard was even talked abt - its rlly interesting to see how much ppl focus or try to act as if the void state is the only way to manifest

cuz like i found out abt the void state like 2 years ago through shifting, but prior to that everything ive manifested has always been super simple i mean currently im literally living my dream life in so many ways possible (i can go into heavy detail in another post lolz) and it was never through the void state or through me reading pages of neville goddard and theories and shit and this isnt me saying theres anything wrong with that its just interesting how no matter how much time passes and different trends with the community continue there's always this need to "logicise" and almost profit off of manifestation

for example i remember ppl would pay money for someone to write affirmations for them (idk if ppl still do this) or people would pay to get tips, i rmbr ppl paying money for OTHER PEOPLE to go into the void state in like 2022 so that they can manifest for you etc — that alongside the concept of manifestation coaches and influencers and its so...tacky

and the same thing goes for submakers, as someone whos had a lot and i mean A LOT of shitty experiences with larger submakers (cons of being a blk autistic ; not a lot of ppl want u to exist happily...if i had a penny for everytime someone asked me to manifest my autism away id be scrooge mcduck) — a lot of them also fall into this category of turning manifestation or LOA into this profitable business and its sad honestly

something that is free, where you dont need anything is being turned into something that is behind a paywall - its almost sinister honestly and rlly makes me feel bad for any younger ppl (like 10-15) who are getting into manifestation or interested in it because u basically have ppl being like "YOU CAN ONLY GET UR DESIRES IN THIS ONE WAY. IF YOU WANT, I CAN DO IT FOR YOU BUT YOU NEED TO PAY ME TONS OF MONEY!!!" - it almost gives a subconscious message that they cant do it on their own which goes against the whole point of manifestation and it just sucks ass

idk maybe im like a commie in the manifestation society #downwiththesocialhierarchy but it rlly irks me and i dont like it and again maybe its cuz i dealt with a lot of bullshit before the LOA community became more...minority friendly and that shit TRAUMATISED ME but like idk i just dont fw it yk

u can do wtv u want in wtv way u want for free, u cant buy a consciousness so you dont need to waste money on shit (obviously if u wanna support a submaker or someone thats perfectly fine but you dont HAVE to)

[jennilah]

sad stuff

oh buddy u know the mental state isnt amazing when ur cilantro plant is at the end if its harvestable life cycle and u cry

and you know it isnt the cilantro but just one more shitty thing

anyway whatever while im here being a sad sack, i might as well be an appreciative sad sack. ive debated saying anything, but i keep being vague about "going thru it" anyway

this whole year has been incredibly difficult with lots of ups and downs caused by many different things, with some of the most severe depressive episodes ive ever experienced in my life

and while ive been doing things to help myself like going outside and reaching out to friends and going to local events in Montreal, one thing thats been tremendous has been sharing art and headcanons and laughing with other Saw fans and especially the coffinshipping community. u guys are cool <3

this week my grandfather passed away. so, yknow, thats another thing that ive just been dealing with. and im fine i guess. my mood has been up and down, as you do while mourning. im better now than i was leading up to it, because theres a kind of peace that came with it. no more suffering and all.

so like yeah. art has been slow. hasnt exactly been my top priority. (though, ive managed to draw a record amount this year anyway. the power of having ship brainrot, I guess) ive just been feeling so overwhelmed and hopeless some days. my friends have been everything to me in these times

and you silly little guys who live in my phone, enabling my shenanigans and making me laugh. you make me want to create more. thanks for your continued patience <3

[saphrun]

Tim Drake HC if he never became robin

(Let's face it, no way he was normal. the brain rot is real)

He was thirteen when Jason died, and he was getting pretty concerned for Bruce, but also getting really off put by the violence becuase batman was never that violent

This pretty much culminates in THE INCIDENT

Tim isn't even taking pictures that night, he had after school detention, and because he knew gotham so well, was decently more muscular then the average person and very fast, he was taking his time

He watches batman almost kill someone. The man will never be able to walk again.

He calls the police, and continues hiding and following Bruce, because something was going on, and lets face it, he didn't really have any plans.

He doesn't know this, but lady shiva is in gotham, and doing the same thing

It turns out theres a villan AND hero intervention going on, where clark may or may not be guilt tripping bruce HARD into getting help

However, before Tim can trail him to the intervention, someone catches his eye

He's not that well dressed, Suit looks nice-ish, but the tie is obviously thrifted, and his watch is a little too good (classic signs of working for a gang, intimidation, spurts of money, clearly not knowing how to spend smart)

Tim decides that this is more important. Plus, what's he going to do tailing batman? Get caught while not even doing anything? No thank you

It turns out that guy worked falcon, and long story short, Tim ends up fighting a bunch of gang members in a wearhouse.

He takes out around half before, Oh lookie there, its batman, and he's rescheduled his intervention till the morning.

Tim is proper injured, a few good bruises and a couple generously bleeding cuts.

Then, because batman is fighting everyone in the warehouse, not just goons, because he doesn’t know what Tim is doing there, skewers him to the wall with a batarang.

Tim pretends to be knocked out but is going what the fuck batman inside his head

Shiva, who has been watching this entire encounter, and was very impressed by someone with little to no formal training goes and drops down menacingly from the rafters

She offers to train Tim and he's like sure ;-;

They go back to paris, and just to say, Tim's parents aren't just MIA. They straight up moved out of gotham and keep limated contact with tim, just making sure CPS doesn't get them into legal trouble

Tims fine with that too

So, in paris, Tim and lady shiva are kicking ass. Tim is learning to play dirty but also gains a strict code

He's very clear that he wont kill anyone, and that he believes keeping them alive is a sign of strength. that he wasn't so weak that killing them was his only option

They disagree but eventually Tim's pretty good at combat and Shiva sends him on his marry way (he beats her in a fight by drugging some food she ate four days prior and wouldn't set in until she was testing him)

Tim starts moonlighting league of assassins, just doing whatever really, and finds out the holly shit, Talia had a thing for bruce and his dead hero jason, brought jason back to life, send him and their secret love child to gotham, and also disrespected Ra's

He thinks shes so cool, and decides to drop by gotham, yk go home, throw in a public appearance with his parents, try the new zelda game

TURNS OUT HIS PARENTS DIE ON THE WAY OVER, ON HIS FOURTEENTH BIRTHDAY

What the flip man, says Tim, on live television, reading a text finding out his parents are dead.

He doesn't say what the text was about though, so the people of gotham make a twitter meme about some rando kid at a gala

The whole things kinda a disaster anyway, so its fine (its later known as The Gala of [insert year])

Dick Grayson just got back from traveling (space) and finds out Jason and Dami are alive/exist, and tries hiding in the back, ending up in the same room as Tim

_______________

"Why are you back here?" Dick Grayson asks the black haired kid sitting at the table, playing what looks like a knock off of neopets. "My parents just died." He says sagely, not looking up from his phone. Dick doesn't really know how to respond to that but ask more questions. "How- uh how did they die?"

Black haired kid shrugs.

[a-whispering-echo]

OMFG WHAT THE BAND DUST LORE IS CRAZY- LIKE THATS SO COOL!!! the more i hear about the band au the more i love

!! <3 <3 thank you! im going to take this as a 'i want more' and continue from where i left off on the other post! <3

running away from his home after his parents murder/suicide with baby Ash in his amrs, Dust walks for a VERY long time - nowerdays he wouldnt be able to tell you how far he went, because he cant remember where he came FROM in the first place, but he did it over a long time, barefoot, until he reached a city, where he found an alleyway, which he huddled up in with Ash for the night, because it had started raining.

at this point, Dust cannot speak english - his parents always wanted his primary language to be korean, and the plan was for him to learn english as he went to school - that never happened.

Dust became attuned to his new life quickly - he found out very quickly where to look for food, where to get cloth from, how to feed a baby - all sorts. he learned to tie his waist length bright blue hair up without a band to keep it away, he found out where to get free clean water from, and he just got on with it.

he never even found out that his parents had been found dead in their home by police, and that those police had found evidence of children living in the house. after such a long time searching for those kids, the officers couldnt fine any sign of them, and so, Ash and Dustin Calvateyla were presumed dead - murdered by their mother and their bodies disposed of somewhere - a monument was put up, with fake gravestones for them, in a row with their parents.

One day, Cross, as we will come to know him, runs away from home, sneaking out his bedroom window after a big fight with his father. it was surprisingly easy for the small 5 year old; one of the staff around the house were watching him at that moment, and his father was too busy in his study, so, out the window he went, and started wandering the streets while crying.

Until he walks down an alleyway, after hearing some song in some language he doesnt know, and finds a boy.

Cross grew up very sheltered, and in fact, hed never seen an asian person before, so, he was a little confused, but to this day, he can remember seeing Dust, holding Ash as hes drifting to sleep, singing in korean, and catching his, very scared and wary eye, and thinking he look SO DAMN COOL.

Likewise, Dust had never seen someone with albinism before, and he thought at first Cross was a ghost. which is why he was so scared.

Cross tries to talk to him - theres a small comic panel of this meeting somewhere! - and it doesnt go well, as he realises this boy doesnt know any english or spanish, so, he tries to communicate with him as best as he can.

After a bit, Cross' stomach rumbles, becuase hes been out for a while by now, and Dusts eyes light up, before he rushes of to this little bowl of what can only be described as warm, mushed up stuff, that Cross is pretty sure is NOT food, and shoves it under his new friends nose.

In Dusts mind, Cross is in the same position he is, hes out in the cold all alone, and hes hungry. Dust has food, and sharing food has always been a THING in his family, so, logically, he tries to share it. he doesnt know Cross has a home, that theres food waiting for him there, all he knows is Cross is ungry. and he doesnt stop trying to force it down his throat until Cross has taken a few sips of the 'stew'.

Cross also realises that hes ripped his shorts slightly in the alleyway, that theres a tiny hole in his clothing, and starts FREAKING out, becuse his father will see and get mad, he'll hurt him, he'll know he left the house, he'll-!

Dust doesnt know what hes saying, but he knows that Cross is upset about the hole, so, he pulls out a small needle and thread, its a sewing machines bobbin wheel, from what Cross can see, but thats not impostant, and without a word, he leands over and starts sewing the holw back up. its nowhere near perfect, but as long as youre not looking for imperfections, its not noticable.

Its at this point Cross decides Dust is him new best friend, and that hes going to sneak out all the time to see him. hes going to teach him english, hes going to bring food, and theyre gonna be friends. and thats exactly what happened.

im gonna stop here again this time, like i said, LONGGG story hehe <3

[butchtwelfthdoctor]

the short answer is no the long answer is that there are a few possiblilties for how twelvespy would fit into the existing canon. the first is that twelve & the spymaster meet before twelve has experienced the events of world enough & time / the doctor falls, and the art in question that i just reblogged 18979187398 times shows him with his s9 hair, which does work timeline wise, if it was s10 i dont think he'd be able to cope both essesntially living with missy (OH MY GOD. HE IS PRETTY MUCH LIVING WITH MISSY IN S10. BWEEEUHHH..) and also being around the spymaster in any capacity, but yknow its that A Problem Happens in Space show so there could be but NAYWAYS, in that scenario missy has died on the colony ship, killed by simm!master, had her moment as the lumiat, been killed by missy iirc (if we're including audio continuity), and then regenerated into the spymaster, who is so so determined to never be anything like missy, never fall that far, to never (in his view) scrape the ground in front of the doctor, let alone admit he had any measure of attraction to them. spymaster burns down gallifrey because the timelords lied to him & also because he was so mad the doctor really was as fucking special a they always acted like they were. So. bearing this is mind.

would spymaster risk the timeline by telling twelve, if not that he probably dies on that colony ship too, that missy died there, killed by her past self, just as & becuase she was about to go stand with the doctor and probably try to save him - something thatspymaster would find embarrassing at best & disgusting at worst, BUT there's also like. A Lot to unpack there. esp if spy & twelve end up getting along fine (i think they'd complement each other's quietly and then explosivley deranged and angry sides, like thats a dynamic i want to see) - how do they ever discuss that. esp if twelve is with missy & if spymaster has met thirteen already then They Both Know that each other died during the events of the end of s10. how do you possibly talk about. that.

another option is that twelve bumped into the spymaster during one of the times he was disguised & stranded on earth but that doesnt quuiiiitteee work well for longer interactions cos then the doctor knows where he is & how hes disguised sooooo

BUT. the other option and the way funner (read : more messed up) option Is That. missy still dies on the colony ship in The Doctor Falls, from simmmaster shooting her, but that she somehow manages to regenerate, find the doctor again - maybe even save him??? from dying there?? maybe even before she fully regenerates you know? simmaster says 'dont bother trying to regenerate, you got the full blast' so if she thinks that she;s Dying For Real she might try to find the doctor before then. but she dies there and the doctor doesnt. bill & heather can still have their exit, just with less of the 'i cant leave the doctor' stuff. SO twelve Knows that missy dies (can probably infer some details that spy isnt willing to tell him), and now has spymaster with him who is far angrier (some of that directed at the doctor) - he didnt die alone as much but he still has tgat resentment there that make him into who he is, in such stark contrast to missy. the way simmaster reacts to her, the way spymaster decides conciously to never ever be like her ever again, BUT with twelve still there who Knows that missy was trying to be god, that she does have good in her heart like he always thought - OOH and spymaster could have this as some of the resentment towards twelve as well, that he Knows how close missy came to actually being good. and even though hes Not Like That Now he can still feel it insided of him and twelve is still there with his stupid sad eyes and its not like either of them could just say 'ok uhmmm see you round i guess' after that but its not like he was going to lock spymaster in the vault again ESPECIALLY if he saved twelve life even a little bit sdo thered be Tension and like what are they gonna do stay in the tardis???? together?????

ahah. uhm anyways

[shrimp-dumpling]

Made something stupid after remembering Eksval (my commandant oc) is still human and therefore cant live forever with the Gray Ravens lol

Item context:

He'll eventually die, he's still just a human. Eventually, some time later, the Gray Raven's won't have him as their commandant anymore.

He doesn't know if they think about it, he prefers they don't. He doesn't like them worrying about the inevitable, especially if its about him.

Of course, the Gray Ravens had never thought about it. Life without their commandant, someone they've bonded so closely with.

Its been a while. Tides and fights are getting desperate and busy enough to distract them from forming such thoughts.

During his rare amounts of spare time, bit by bit, he made a little toy. 3 gray ravens on a raised platform. When you touch their heads, they bob, and then go back up.

It also served as a camera of sorts, to record moments and preserve them.

It was a simple device, really. Eksval had also decided to color the gray ravens' eyes to match the Gray Raven members' main colors.

He goes to the debriefing room and attaches it on a shelf, making sure no one will steal it. He taps the head of the one with blue eyes, and as expected, it bowed.

Smiling in satisfaction that it was working properly, he leaves the room and goes off to tend to his business.

The ravens' eyes glowed in the dark. For now, there was nothing to record.

But one day, those records will be the only thing left of the commandant, a reminder of his existence to the Gray Ravens.

Item description:

A recording device made by a certain commandant. On a small, raised platform, stood three gray ravens. The ravens seems to represent the members of the Gray Ravens, though it was only evident due to the eye colors.

There was not a fourth raven though, signifying that the certain commandant who made it did not last. Or atleast, not permanently.

Engraved on the raised platform were the words "Gray Raven", as if it wasn't obvious enough that it belonged to them.

SLIGHTLY modified (as in i changed the numbers) song cuz i suddenly thought about it while making this (no eksval does not die it was all just a nightmare totally haha):

4 birds on a wire— (the gray ravens stood next to each other, contented and happy)

3 tried to fly, away, and the other— (missions took place, battles were inevitable. Due to this, the contructs had to leave and fight)

watches them close from that wire.. (the commandant watched over them, making sure nothing went wrong. It was his job to make sure they come back together.)

He says he wants to as well- (the commandant eventually joins their mission on the surface, even if it was dangerous. He tells them to not worry and that he'll be fine by their side,)

But he is a liar. (but it's not like he was the most honest man either.)

I'll believe it all— (even if the Gray Ravens were skeptical, especially Lee, they still choose to believe their commandant on his words)

There's nothing I won't understand (afterall, why would their commandant need to lie? Surely theres a reason for everything. The Gray Ravens trust their commandant.)

I'll believe it all (they trust his judgement, they believe in him.)

I won't let go of your hand (they wont let go of him, and he won't let go of them too. He'll continue guiding them, the sweet ducklings he has raised)

4 birds on a wire... (and once more, they were back together)

3 say 'come on', and the 4th said 'im tired..' (they had a mission coming up. They waited for their commandant but he didn't appear. Celia informs them that due to complications, the commandant couldn't go with them.)

The sky's overcast, (The sky hasn't been blue, not for a while now. Though they do wonder why it was cloudy, it was a little rare for it to be cloudy.)

And im sorry. (Celia couldn't tell them. No one could tell them what happened. They're so sorry.)

-

-

-

4 birds of a feather, say that they're always gonna stay together (it was a promise made. An empty one that Eksval felt sorry for.)

But one's never going to let go of that wire. (he was only human. As much as he was a great commandant, he was only human. He will always just be human.)

He says that he will, (promises are made, promises are broken. Eksval was never the most honest man afterall.)

But he's just a liar. (and yet, it still hurt when he broke that promise.)

("Tell me, was it such a crime to love you?")

[roseworth]

vote in my poll boy but also im gonna skew my own results by giving my opinion. here’s my personal ranking of rose writers

sean mckeever: FRESH HELL <3 literally THE rose book. also tt03 #57 slayed. he ALMOST gets knocked down on the list because a) the fucking shitshow that was terror titans and b) he backtracked on like 3 different character arcs as soon as he started writing tt and it pisses me off. but he redeemed himself with fresh hell

geoff johns: i hate johns so much. but he solidified sooo much about rose as a character that he has pretty much the definitive rose. what he did completely defined rose's relationship with her father and her attitude towards the titans/being a hero in general. whether they realize it or not, every rose writer after johns is writing his version of her. as much as i hate him he is one of the best rose writers and i will stand by that

christopher priest: i have not made it a secret that i love ds16. there are some aspects of his characterization that i dont agree with but for the most part he killed it tbh. hating her dad but still coming back to him, loving her brother but still keeping him at arms length, HOSUN!!! HER HMONG FAMILY!!!!!!! ily priest

ed brisson: SLAY. the only reason he's not higher is because i dont like the fact in general that she chose to be on stormwatch (she would not do that), and he used baby rose in ktr and didnt even mention lili (and DID mention that foster family. im still mad). other than that!!! everything about her struggle to be a good person in batb was soooo good, and so much about ktr was so good for her <3 thank u mr brisson

marv wolfman: i feel a little bad not ranking him higher given that. he created rose. but she doesnt really do much in the issues he writes. which is fair given that she was a new character that was just made to hang around on the sidelines at the time, so theres not a lot to judge in his writing. but he definitely laid the foundation that johns expanded on, and he was the one that made her so uh thnx marv

jt krul: i wish he had gotten more time :( i wish he had gotten to do whatever he was planning with lili, i wish we could've gotten to see more of his rose. his rose was def a different take than before given that she was more... mellowed out ig? it was a lot more lighthearted, just her hanging out with the team, being an older sister to damian (<3), and looking for her mom. hes not my fav just because i like it when shes a crazy bitch instead of a normal girl, but i completely understand why people like his rose. not to mention tt03 #77-78 slays so unbelievably hard

jay faerber: NANNY ROSE <33333 i love love love rose in titans 99 <3 this version of rose is DRASTICALLY different than any other rose, which is the reason hes in the bottom half, but i like it in the sense that its nice to know that she was just hanging out in between the two worst things to ever happen to her (her mom dying & slade drugging her). rose with roy and lian lives rent free in my head every single day of my life i love it so much, also that issue with rose & toni was so fun. titans 99 rose you will always be famous

adam beechen: he is going to hell for what he did to cass but for rose? he was fine. he helped with that one really good wilson family arc (tt03 #43-46), and wrote the only pre-52 rose & jason interaction (#47) so he gets points for that. and batgirl 2008 was pretty good for rose. but unfortunately he just didnt make enough of an impact on me to be ranked any higher

matthew rosenberg: unfortunately im mentally ill so i have a detailed explanation of what i think of rosenberg's rose but the short version is: i like him, he writes a good rose. its fun, shes well-written for the most part, but there are some :/ parts about it to me. i think if he continues writing her he'd be ranked higher but for now hes sitting pretty near the bottom of the list

devin grayson: i used to really like devin grayson's rose but. i have since changed my mind. it doesnt feel like rose. this is NOT the rose that stabbed her eye out because she thought slade was disappointed in her! shes too Quirky Girl here even though this is theoretically during the period where shes being drugged (honestly. i dont think grayson actually knew about the super soldier serum. and if she did it does not show) and we've seen rose in this era in tt03 and bg00, and this arc does not read as the same character at all. it was a good arc for her, and she had a lot of good moments here! but the characterization overall wasnt great

joshua williamson: i won't go on a whole tangent about the way williamson writes but. he has no sense of character voice, his characters all feel like blank slates to get the plot across, there are no character decisions being made besides what's needed for the plot. theres not a lot that i can put my finger on and say that its bad, but there are so few choices being made that its hard to say anything about his rose. to put a completely different character in rose's place in robin 2021, all you'd have to do is switch a few words around. williamson uses a vague idea of who a character is to guide what he wants them to do, and all his characters come out shallow. his rose wasnt BAD but it wasnt good at all

scott lobdell: every day i blow on a dandelion and wish for scott lobdell to kill himself

[internalself]

(RBs appreciated! this is for the community, so any way the community can find it, is help.)

I posted my take on a transjapanese flag some time ago on a separate blog i lost the login info for. The post is still up, but i thought id repost it here, because i made a higher quality version and it also has mascots now!

I personally call it the 4 season flag. The mascots are up to you what one you like more, I picked a pheasant because its the national bird of japan (Phasianus versicolor) while I picked a tanuki for the second mascot because its an animal that comes to lots of people's minds when they think of japan, but also because its a japanese animal even named after in english for its resemblance to an animal that is not. The tanuki is 友彩 Yua, the pheasant is 優羽 Yuwa. Neither of them have a gender, as in you can portray their genders however you'd like.

If anyone who has an account on a transid wiki would like to archive these terms and designs, be my guest!

Some less fun stuff under the cut

I would prefer if you kept use of these characters to positivity and education!

any "reclaimations" of these characters should be and will be considered theft.

The 4 seasons flag was created in my response to personally not liking the pink transjpn flag. i feel as though it feeds into stereotypes and a fixation on idol culture and "kawaii" obsession that personally i feel is a bad call to choose to boast about, but also it does not feel as all-encompassing, or like its painting all of us as being such. i didnt connect with it much. japan is much more than hello kitty and sakura season. if you connect with that, sure thats fine, but not everyone does so i wanted to make a flag that includes more people and recognizes more than what is the most consumable on the internet.

each stripe on my flag represents the 4 seasons. pink for spring flowers, purple for summer flowers, orange for autumn leaves, and white for winter snow. (i would have added blue for the rainy season and to represent the ocean but i wanted the flag to be recognizable and simple, as well as the colors to mesh together in a sort of sunrise look, due to the sun in the middle and reputation of japan being the country of the rising sun.) the cut through the lower half splits the autumn in two, because theres many colors of autumn leaves, and many people who comes from many walks of life who would unite under this flag. it continues into the center stripe to make a shadow of a mountain and the sky, representing both people who are closeted and people who are out, and people who are struggling and people who are happy. the sun is residual of the flag of japan and other transjpn flags. i also chose the 4 seasons as a theme because the seasons change as time passes regardless of where you live, sometimes it changes the way the world looks and sometimes not so much. people also change with time, sometimes they change physically and some dont, but no matter where someone is from, they can change, and it is natural to change.

here's the more reference intended images i made

please do not use my art for commercial reasons. i do intend to use the images at the top of the post for physical goods in the future.

please do not use my art for machine learning in any way

please credit me when using the designs! (if this blogs go down, you can credit my (as the mod who did this) art handle on many sites Togainunochi. if you want to refer to me as a person, its okay to use my first name Masato 真人.

I would prefer if you didnt but i cant stop if you..:

use my designs for political reasons other than transjpn acceptance

used my designs for violent or sexual imagery

used my designs for commercial reasons (on original art you made) without giving me a cut of any profits

portrayed my designs with mascots for microlabel "blank-queer" movements.

use my designs for hate or policing in any way, including portraying them as intolerant or unkind

portray my characters as any label outside of the one they directly are representing

yes, you may:

be inspired by my works (but please, be original. thats what gives a design charm!)

self ship with these designs

publicly be connected to these designs in any way (introject, kin, etc) but please do not make statements about me or the supposed beliefs of these characters as all encompassing. derivative designs are allowed (kinsonas, etc) so long as they are clearly listed as such and still credit me as the creator.

headcanon behaviors, likes, dislikes, fashion, gender, etc. but please remember the focus should always be when it comes to their identity, that they are transjpn.

use the artwork and designs with credit on works not including personal unrelated ideology (DNI banners, for example, would be not allowed.)

make moodboards, stimboards, etc, based off the characters

draw this oc next to other trace mascots or general radqueer mascots. (i prefer NOT blankqueers because some of them are openly anti-trace or otherwise tracist and i would prefer my designs not be connected to that, or to movements unrelated to them or containing otherwise personally disagreeable values which could make others interpret it as me agreeing with said values)

draw fanart of these designs, write fictions around them, etc.

really anything. i cant control you, i dont want to either. i would prefer that you stay mindful and respectful of me and other creators around you! my characters are just characters, but you actions may have consequences for yourself or for ME so please be careful and respectful.

please do not harass anyone that you see defying this list, but i would encourage a gentle reminder, and if behavior continues please contact me. if you drew these characters, you can also contact me because i would love to see it, and if it is okay with you, archive the fanworks with the rest of the character works! preferably send these to @ togainunochi on Cohost, where you do not need to be signed in to make an ask.

if you are interested in helping me spread anything else to do with trans-identity activism and discussion, i did coin the term "pwii" to mean "people/person with identity incongruence" as an alternative to transid/transx that includes people who may not use the label for any reason but is still important to the discussions surrounding incongruent identities to the physical or socially perceived self! i would be happy if this term got used more, i feel as though it could help with a lot of the divide between transid people and those using different labels.

i may edit this at any point.

please direct any questions to my art related question taking blog.

[streaminn]

wenclair angst bc i love suffering

continuing the “enid realizes she isnt much and does smth abt it” train, lets start with the season ending. 

Maybe Enid is still reeling from the “the mark you left is indelible” but is struck on how little she can give when she sees Wednesday look up to see Xavier.

its a stray thought that ruins her mind.

That he would fit so much better at Wednesday’s side. All gloomy and edgy and artistic-

From what we know from the show alone, he seems pretty rich. Dude’s in a secret club, the wiki mentions how his dad and most likely his family is famous enough to have the Addams family visit a funeral so its a slap to the face to see him give her a phone just like that.

Is enid poor? prob not, but i like to think that she’s atleast middle class that tends to be overlooked for her other better family members. Does she have a lil hoarding and possessive issue bc of this? yeah, itd explain why her bed got so many plushies and why she seemed so insulted when her window got taken apart by wednesday.

continuing, now that Enid knows that there are others that can give so much more, she kind of gets into a funk when she goes back home. The two face of her family now that she wolfed out has her cringing and she has two months and a week until she comes back to nevermore for the 2nd semester.  

So, maybe its the heightened emotions from the recent wolf out but an argument happens and Enid fucking books it from her home when it gets too violent. No phone, no wallet just her and the clothes on her body.

Maybe its the spite, maybe its her thoughts or maybe its the cliche that esther is controlling but Enid gets it in her head that she couldnt be anything with her family. She was outside her family’s clutches when she manages to transform after all.

She needed space, she needed time and freedom to get what she wants.  

It doesnt make sense but shes emotional, a lil high strung and her chest aches when she looks at how messy she is after tumbling around a forest.

So its decided. she needs time away from her family, the family that looks and prods and sees her as anything but who she is and goes to make smth of herself. The sinclair pack is small and nothing much outside of her home, so she decided to be bigger than that.

Its childish, its absolutely moronic to be something so much more than Enid Sinclair the late werewolf and when she notes that shes doing it because she just want to fit next to Wednesday?

it sends her to hysterics but shit- the last words Wednesday said to her reminds Enid that she actually was notable in someones life. 

Sure, theres Yoko but Yoko is a vampire. They live for centuries and its an asshole move to assume but Enid knows that she’ll be forgotten in time but Wednesday?

Wednesday held like her like she was precious and Enid so desperately wants to prove that right. She doesnt just want to be that werewolf who trails after Wednesday Addams. She wants to be Enid, the one who Wednesday can lean on fully.

Not tyler, not Xavier but her. 

But to be that, she has to be stronger, richer and maybe alot more resourceful. She isnt any of that and it hurts but its better to try than not do anything at all.

so with baggy sleeves and scratched knees, Enid straightens her shoulders to walk back home to fully execute her plans. 

Its all fine and dandy, she’s looking for a job and searching up proper work outs. Its all okay! Until, another werewolf pack comes to visit her town and now that she finally wolfed out, she’s falling face first into Wolf culture that she wasn’t fully exposed to before.

[quitealotofsodapop]

Monkey King Reborn Au misc details;

Cus I'm starting to obsess over Monkey King Reborn, Imma talk a little bit about important worldbuilding and story details. Some spoilers for the film itself ahoy under Read More;

Because in the events of the film had Yuandi/Primordium gathering a bunch of the big name demons together and a few die on the battlefield, the mid-way chapters of the journey get shuffled around a bit. Notably the pilgrims make it to Slow-Cart Kingdom a bit faster since a bunch of the threats are missing and their route has been altered.

However, they do end up encountering the Yellow Robed Demon shortly after leaving Slow-Cart Kingdom and wandering into Baoxiang. There they learn of the King's missing princess and Tripitaka convinces the gang to investigate (Wukong groaning the whole time). Cue the giant wood-wolf demon who didn't get the mesasge that his reincarnated sweetie didn't remember him/and wants nothing to do with him now he's forced 13 years of marriage on her. Despite causing some confusion (Tripitaka gets a little cursed its fine *lies*), Kui Mulang gets put down quickly with Wukong on the scene from the very start. However... theres a few loose ends that neither Princess Hundred Flowers nor her father have interest in keeping...

Pigsy, carrying a half-wolf demon child on his back: "Explain to me how we've become a damned nursery?" Wukong, carrying the younger pup against his chest: "Because the Princess and King disowned them, and Master refuses to let them be culled or left to the wilds." Pigsy: "No I mean. Why are we dealing with them?" Wukong, blushing a little: "We uh... Macaque asked to keep them." Pigsy: "Such a whipped husband you are!" Wukong: "We aren't married!" Pigsy, swatting at SWK while the pup on his back laughs: "Then its shameful you have so many children while unwed!" *fighting continues* Macaque, whispering to Xiao Qi: "I think your baba and uncle are fighting again little one. Hopefully you wont squabble as much with your elder siblings." Xiao Qi: *is just delighted to have siblings* :D!!

The two half-wood wolf demon pups are named Zhu Yu/茱萸 ("cornelian dogwood") a pre-teen girl, and Ku Ai/苦艾 ("wormwood") a toddler-age boy. Neither are particularly happy or understanding why they can't live with their mom and/or dad anymore, and frequently act out by going wolf on the pilgrims. Neither are much help in a fight, but they're pretty good at sneaking around.

The Lady Bone Demon chapter also goes... very differently than in canon. Especially since she has a debt she wishes to "cash in" from a certain monkey, and a tasty-looking monk for her to eat... A team spilt occurs like in the book, and the Six Eared Macaque cashes in a different favor to make it up to them. Especially after the Bone Demon threatens someone very dear to both monkeys.

Jin and Yin are there too. They've devoted their new lives to fufilling a life debt to the Six Eared Macaque ever since he "saved" them after Yuandi's battle. He finds them annoying.

[aggressiveguitarnoises]

i have media studies exam (although mock so its fine) that i didnt study for so im gonna force myself to practice by applying barthes narrative theory to season 1 hannibal (vaguely tbh cuz its the whole seasom but ok)

hermeneutic codes(how do u even pronounce this omfg) :

enigma codes, they are def crucial to this show as each episode raises more and more unanswered questions as the audience continues watching the show, questions like who is commiting the crimes, is will ok, does he know how fucked up his clocks are, is crawford fucking stupid, is abigail ok, what the hell is hannibal doing, why are they using cat guts for strings, are the dogs gonna live oh my god please can the dogs be okay for once

usually done by leaving cliffhangers for each episode

it drives the audience forward and interests them so they continue watching the show to find out the answers to their questions

its also a convention to use hermeneutic codes for horror crime shows like hannibal

Proairetic codes:

action codes, the actions done to drive the narrative forward, previous events drive other events into action. ngl this one is fucking stupid to apply i dont get if i ever apply it correctly

in hannibal, proairetic codes tie a lot with hermeneutic codes as the actions of the characters raise questions for the audience questioning their choices and makes the audience wonder what will happen next. the action creates tension and makes the audience wonder how the created problem(if there is one) will be resolved. for example when hannibal lecter called abigails father to inform him that "they know" and that fbi is on the way. this drives the narrative forward as then the audience wonders how the characters will react and wonder how the actions will affect the story. this action ended up with abigail becoming an orphan and their suspect dead, creating a few side plots and introducing new characters. this constant tension created by each action drives the narrative forward and engages the audience to continue watching the show

semantic codes:

connotations, things associated with something, the deeper level meaning of a symbol. this one is hard yet so easy cuz theres literally SO many of them

they basically give insight into the plot and characters, building personalities and maybe even starting the deep questions the audience will have

for example, for hannibal, hes quite sophisticated, the semantic codes for that would be how he wears suits all the time, his overall style and his acquired taste. those things connote sophistication, wealth and even control and power (especially the suit and his high respected position as a psychiatrist)

but another thing that can be derived from things like how hes always careful, always has a cloth that doesn't leave any fabric fibres, how he doesn't use anything digital, only physical things like journals to leave no traces, the fact that hes literally eating his evidence lmao, his knowledge and experience of human anatomy and mind connote that hes a careful, experienced, ambitious man and prob(definitely) is a serial killer

symbolic codes:

it has such an easy concept that its literally confusing to understand. its basically symbols, binaries, a thematic/structural device, but it's basically about themes and contrary signs specifically, which is ig why its kind of difficult to understand since its specifically binary symbols

some symbolic codes in hannibal would be life vs death, clearly a reoccurring theme with all of the crimes happening, good vs bad, murderers and their victims, health? both physical and mental? stability? work vs personal life? idk its so hard to pin point it even tho its so easy and common idk

a better example woukd be the bad vs good binary used in star wars with ghe colours of light sabers

Cultural codes:

literally cultural and social conventions, knowledge that comes from the outside world of the text, specific connotations used

example, FBI for crimes and america, religion and faith, the whole fbi units especially medical, even Christmas is a cultural code as its a celebrated event of certain social and cultural and religious conventions

bruv i cant think of any more examples even tho i know theres so many

hope yall enjoyed my silly analysis of hannibal as my media studies application practice if u read it all xx

[ozymoron]

tell me a bit about sophia (i mean if u want) im interested

gladly. i love talking about her

shes a 20 something year old german trans woman living in nz. shes 5'10" (somewhere around like 177.80cm) and a lesbian. she uses she/her pronouns but is fine with being called a guy or people using he/him for her as long as she know they believe her when she says shes a woman (like they dont mean it in a transphobic way). she has a deep voice and a german accent i havent really got much of the worldbuilding down yet but i do have most of her personality down. also her story takes place in some vague year between 2000 and now

shes kinda a huge loser like in the sense that she spends most of her time just sorta sitting around at home drinking beer and smoking while listening to industrial and hardcore and metal and shit (shes almost definitely depressed but im yet to explore that side of her lmao). she drinks and drives, shes incredibly wreckless. she kinda doesnt care that much about others but more in a way where shes just kinda always in her own head only thinking about herself and what she wants but when it comes to the people close to her shes incredibly protective like a guard dog. she acts like kinda a silly idiot around her loved ones but as soon as someone even looks at any of them wrong, shes fully ready to kill them. she clings onto her friends and stuff like theyre the last thing she has left. less in a desperate kinda codependent way and more in a "i could not live without you i will protect you with all i have trust me please stick around and keep me in your life i will make my existence worth your while" kind of way

shes a wannabe badass but also just is a badass. like she acts all cold and stoic but laid back, i guess in a way trying to seem all mysterious and cool but mostly just comes off like a bit of a jackass (cause she kinda is a bit of a jackass but she means well. sometimes.) i havent got to this part of the worldbuilding so i dont have an explanation for why she is this way but im planning that theres something she has to fight against or something like that. i have a bit of a vague idea of what i want but no specifics but she has a side to her where like shes actually kinda badass. she wears a wolf mask and carries around this baseball bat which the tip is like covered in nails and shit. im planning she gets covered in blood often because women covered in blood is awesome. im planning a theme with the group of characters she hangs out with where they all wear some kind of animal mask and each have their own weapon which like reflects their personality and whatnot

she works in a fast food restaurant which i feel like explains a lot about her

she mostly wears the mask to hide her identity but also to just hide her face in general. shes not insecure about how she looks but more just worried about what other people think of her. shes on hrt but she wants to keep her body hair cause she likes her body hair which includes her facial hair though she does regularly shave it cause she knows it gets her misgendered. she also wears a spiked collar and sometimes a leash (if shes not wearing a leash shes wearing some kind of bondage harness thing) both to continue the whole wolf dog thing shes got going on and also for sexual reasons of course

she has a romance thing going on with another oc of mine called blair (the name is a placeholder im so bad at picking names). blairs tiger/big cat coded shes more of the happy-go-lucky chaotic type. sophia goes incredibly soft for her like the whole trying to be a stoic badass thing completely drops around her she would sacrifice herself in a heartbeat if it meant blair was kept alive and safe which worries the fuck out of blair cause half the time she does not need to sacrifice herself but she puts herself in danger for blair often times for no reason cause she believes its what she needs to do to keep her safe. like her life is meaningless without blair so she'd rather be the one to die than live without blair. which like yeah theres a flaw in her logic cause like if she dies shes still without blair and now blairs sad but yknow. maybe she'll figure that out someday not sure tho shes a little stupid

idk what else to write so ill just add little tiny things i added to her for fun her favourite movie is evil dead 2 (this is me projecting onto her), she moans when she pees, she would give everything to be a werewolf, she had her drivers license taken from her she still drives tho. she shouldnt but she does, she hates beer but drinks it anyways. i think she doesnt know theres other kinds of alcohol. no idea how she doesnt know maybe she just hates herself and wants to drink shit that tastes bad for fun,

shes all i have left im going crazy

i also have a playlist for her if anyone besides me cares i care so fucking deeply. also my tag for her i feel also illustrates her personality well

[snoopyliker]

okay so. still trying to piece this all together before you know its done for me so Pausing the episode heres what im understanding

the santo berço is a town that exists in a place where the membrane is incredibly weak and the reason the people look different is because we know that bodies begin to shift and change when they stay too long in these areas so i believe the gray skin, point ears, and such is a side effect on these people who were once “ignaro” they transform the longer they stay. my thought process at least rn regarding their appearances

the reason the black eyes stood out to me is because during the 6th episode with the fight when they were losing the power checks and theyd lose control and their eyes would get blacker as if consuming them right? and theyd begin to have black tears running down their face. which is really fucking specific so im wondering if the black eyes there is the same type of scenario we’re seeing here. sorta implying some sort of controlled state? or heres the thing they call themselves lucidio? i forgot how to spell it kekw which is im assuming derived from the word lucid and that sorta represents an awareness of a dreaming state. unsure if that plays into something here with their consciousness and awareness of everything it seems

the blacksmith said the tree represents their life in a way and i found it interesting that the trial is this three year thing where when they return they chop down that tree. its like a metaphor for what happens when they choose to stay in santo berço right? this tree is growing their life and when they return its cut its no longer able to continue growing it stays in that state forever now. staying in santo berço is like ending your life the growth of it. and i wonder if thats what its meant to basically mean.

what i found interesting was that the gatekeeper was brought when he was 8 and he remembers his life before santo berço and the fact children can be brought here was really interesting to me because they generally lack a sorta agency when it comes to making decisions? idk if the gatekeeper talks more about his backstory but im assuming he was brought by his parents or guardian to live here. hes 23 now so this town has existed for a Long Time. a fucking while.

what i found interesting was they themselves dont quite understand the maze and treat it as this legend and tale. but it has this thick mist around it which we know to mean an area with a very very weak membrane. which isnt surprising with all of this. but they dont seem to know that themselves. the 5 statues i assumed were the doctors but i havent gotten there yet to where anything is said about them. so im just assuming the 5 guardians are them but the thing is their documents were recent years like 2019 and 2020 and we know FOR A FACT this town has existed way longer. so either the 5 guardians arent the doctors who were doing this project and founded this town and instead someone else OR IT IS THE DOCTORS AND THERES SOME TIME TRAVEL AT PLAY.

they all are relatively aware right like they knew about caprizinha and they knew about other towns nearby and they know how cellphones and the seemingly how different the world is outside their town etc the only real confusing discrepancy is how they bring people. supposedly just asking? and people accept? and stay forever? and are seemingly happy forever? murcilos case was really odd because when we met him he really seemed to love his girlfriend jessica but when asked about her here he said well you know theres other things to life and generally the notion that its fine he doesnt care he left a life behind with no warning to anybody. like it holds so little value? thats where im like okay clearly theres some trickery something isnt adding up for people to just vanish and leave their lives. but again theyre in this town right now and dont seem to be manipulated in any way? they still have that option to leave according to the blacksmith but again they did enter in an unexpected way.

now when they found the town they did pass by a fog where they couldnt see anything except the path and an illuminated way that led them to santo berço so i wonder what exactly happened there. because they were looking for The Cave and instead found this town and its like okay how does that fucking happen. i keep going back to cesars reaction where they were going to enter the forest. the feeling that there was no going back and that shiver.

now i think back to what the doctors were doing and trying to achieve and the major question remains as Why? i wish i had taken photos of all the documents so i can read them all myself again lmao. whats the reason? they live without names just titles they have no technology or electricity they called those things aberrations. why why why why whats the point? how is this town used in an ulterior motive. its not just a town it functions to do something clearly. but what?

ok ima play the episode again ive just been ranting kkkkkk

Still so confused about the old man fml. ik on one of his papers it was written “im the blacksmith” but like was he really? is the symbol burn mark on his back one of those markings the people of santo berço seem to have on their faces the same? do all blacksmiths have that marking on their back? was his tongue cut because he left santo berço? i need to understand how he plays into this meu deus. did he even write that paper? was he just holding it? he clearly knew enough to run down that basement and release subject whatever the fuck