#trigger warning grooming

[pearl484-blog]

My issue with Senti-Adrien

One of the reasons I don't like the senti-adrien theory is because I feel it takes away an important element of the environment he's grown up in: that pervasive feeling that it's wrong to not be okay with something, that it's wrong to disobey.

In the culture I've grown up in, Doublespeak is used A LOT. You are NEVER supposed to insult someone or have an impolite conversation with them. You can't express discomfort, and I always seem to find myself in disgreements where if I leave to cool down, that's not the right option.

Everyone -especially the women who face more social stigma- is likely going to get into a situation that they CAN'T leave. They don't know how, and they may not even have the tools to recognize that they WANT TO. That it's not healthy. After all, if someone hasn't done something OBVIOUSLY WRONG, you can't be impolite. Even if you're uncomfortable.

Of course, then it becomes a slow boil, the things you have to not react to (and sometimes even pretend you enjoy) become worse and worse, but never so much worse than the last time you didn't react.

In the end, a lot of people don't understand why you would be near people who make you feel uncomfortable. Why you can't stand up for yourself. Why you treat people who treat you like shit kindly.

Adrien could've been a girl and depicted this. A high class girl constantly under the spotlight for her father's fame could easily be pressured to be a sweetheart, a good girl, and everyone could see "oh, well, she's a girl. Of course she'd be taken advantage of eventually. An abusive father? Well, I'm not surprised."

But Adrien’s a guy who is under the same social pressures as a girl in a believable way. He's not expected to be abused in that way. He's a guy. Guys "can't be emotionally abused/not know this is wrong". Except, yes, they can. Anyone of any gender can be abused by anyone of any other gender, and a guy may show traditionally female signs of abuse and grooming as abused to the traditionally masculine agression and acting out.

First off, Adrien is a model. He's used to being constantly objectified. His body is literally posed for everyone to stare at as his job. He's also a teen model, and almost certainly has had to release private details of his life for strangers to obsess over in an environment that says this is normal. This is good.

He can't complain because much like girls here, it would ruin his reputation as a nice guy, so he's defaulted to a very normal coping skill in these parts. Rationalization. See, it's easier to keep your temper if you can excuse others behavoirs as perfectly reasonable to yourself. And with enough practice, ANYTHING can be reasonable. Combine that with the classic downplay, a classic of everyone in these parts -for the sake of politeness of course, and your reality is normal, bearable, not worth complaining about.

But it obfuscates mistreatment to outsiders. Outsiders who haven't internalized "this is okay. This is normal. This is expected". As Adrien interacts more and more with these outsiders, and they realize what Adrien does not, what he cannot, they become concerned.

And Chat? Chat Noir offers hope. Chat is proof that Adrien, without those social pressures, CAN stand up for himself, and he can do it while still being kind and empathetic and considerate. Chat is proof that deep down, Adrien would thrive outside of those pressures.

Yet, without Plagg, without his ring or an escape, he cant. He can't think of a way to do that since his reputation is on the line. It's enormous, that desire to make people think you're good, that you're not a trouble maker, that you're useful to them. Adrien, I feel, portrays that well.

It is a completely invisible, omnipresent force that outsiders cannot understand. You dont even understand how much of an effect it has on you until you're away from it.

The senti-monster theory makes that force one you LITERALLY cannot disobey. Now, some may argue that makes it work as a metaphor, but no. I think the fact that you CLEARLY have no choice, as seen by an outsider is to its detriment. Yes, being in that situation makes you feel like you have no choice, but to an outsider?

It looks like you do, you're just not taking it. It looks like you're too weak, or indecisive, or stupid to do the obvious thing and realize you're in an abusive situation and leave. There’s nothing an outsider can blame your "flaws" on, no excuse, and under the amount of pressure, nothing that you can say that would justify you be so weak/stupid/indecisive. Because unless you've been outside that culture in a way that let you realize what it did to you, all you can think is that it was just you.

[lemaistrechat]

This is the most vile plan Skeletor ever tried, and it’s not even close.

From 1983 mini-comic “The Tale of Teela”. There was enough of a time gap between this story and the writing of Season 1 of the 1983 cartoon for the premise of Teela being the Goddess/Sorceress’ offspring adopted by Man-At-Arms to be made more family-friendly for the episode “Teela’s Quest”.

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

What ended up happening with your psychologist appointment ?

Aww thank you for asking! It actually went well. It was really really draining and emotionally exhausting though. I can’t go too much into detail because of confidentiality stuff but I wasn’t the sole reason my old psychologist ended up being asked to leave. But she said after finding out what he did she was very happy she let him go.

I ended up writing down everything that happened so a formal report / complaint can be made to the board. That was hard honestly because I just kept feeling like a horrible person for doing so. But the lady there was really nice and supportive.

TW -

So it turns out he was grooming me. And this probably sounds weird but it’s like I feel more affected by that confirmation then I do about what he did to me. Like don’t get my wrong I’m very uncomfortable with what he said to me. And I especially felt VERY triggered by him telling me lesbians could happily be sexually attracted to men just because that set my PTSD right off. But I guess just having the firm yes he was grooming me sent me a for a bit of a loop. Because it happened with a family member of mine when I was in high school too and I guess I just thought it was once and dusted thing. I didn’t think it would happen again. So I guess someone seeing something in me and wanting to groom me again just makes me feel weird. And it’s left me thinking why. Is it my personality. Is it my appearance. What is it. I felt a bit sad after as well because I kept thinking well it’s probably just going to happen again isn’t it.

Or just making me feel weird about mental health professionals in general. Because I have not had a good track record. So I can’t help but think maybe something is wrong with me or maybe I’m doing something I shouldn’t be or I’m too emotional since it keeps happening.

But for the most part I feel good about everything and I’m glad it’s all done now so I don’t have to worry about it anymore. I’m thinking I might order myself a book tonight as a treat ahah.

But thank you for asking and popping in. I hope you have a lovely day ☺️🌸💕

[alcorian]

i kinda agree with you, but what if a person writes pedophilic/csa texts? i don't think it should be allowed. even if it's fictional it's still cp and it pisses me off so much when people say it's fictional so it's fine

sigh.

look dude, do you know the person? do you know why theyre writing it? do you know how they feel about it? do you know who they are outside of their writing?

no, you probably dont. you dont know if this is someone writing about their trauma, or sexualizing their trauma (which is a legitimate way to cope with it, dont argue with me just because you have icky feelings about it). you dont know the author's intent (and you cant ever know for sure). you dont know if someone is exploring their fear. there are a million and one reasons for someone to write a story about a dark topic.

furthermore, fiction doesnt inherently hurt anyone. it just doesnt. there is no moral value to writing a story where CSA occurs because none of those characters are real and not a single real-life person has been harmed.

can it be triggering? can you find it disgusting? can you avoid it like the plague? certainly. i do. its a trigger for me.

but my trigger is my responsibility. i dont read stories involving CSA in any way shape or form. i ask people to tag it. and i never have to see it. crazy how simple that is. thats not sarcastic, i actually love how simple it is.

[idiot-mushroom]

was going through it last week

[allhailthequeenuwu]

⚠️⚠️TRIGGER WARNING Sa, Grooming, Doxxing ect⚠️⚠️

This video is explaining the controversy between the creator of YourBoyfriend Game AKA Fuboo & the toxic fans who are involved in the Drama. People have been doxx & harassed by these people for clapping back on Twitter but they have a bigger influence so I ask of you, people of Tumblr please spread the word & warn people of what's going on the the fandom

THE VIDEO IS HERE PLEASE GO WATCH IT AND SPREAD THE WORD

👇👇👇https://drive.google.com/file/d/1rmwtU5G1WnTcfdN9J4NG0HHBjwtTGl-V/view?usp=sharing

[welcomehomeincorrectquotes]

I need your help with the SCP: Welcome Home AU:

Possible Trigger Warning for: harrassment, pedophilia, abuse, grooming.

Do not interact if you feel this will be distressing for you. Take care of yourself.

I recently heard of some controversies surrounding the character Jack Bright and the original "creator" AdminBright.

Due to the nature of the SCP Foundation universe, Doctor Bright as a character that has become a beast all of their own, altered and improved through the creativity and hard work of many authors, artists, roleplayers, etc. That awful person doesn't really have a connection to the character anymore.

BUT

I do not want to make anyone uncomfortable or upset. I want everyone to have fun on this page.

So I thought I should ask for your opinions. What should I do?

My options are:

Keep using Jack Bright for the AU. The name is iconic and as previously mentioned, is a character lovingly put together by the SCP fanbase.

Alter any previous mentions of Jack Bright for the proposed rebrand of Elias Shaw? They may not have the "star power" of Jack Bright, but they also don't carry the baggage that comes the name.

Move Jack/Elias into the background; they do not need to be here, and The Foundation has plenty of colourful characters that could play a role in the story.

Maybe we could just make a new doctor character for the AU, start on a clean slate? Maybe we can slip some cheeky references to ClownCoffin themselves in the character?

This is a heavy topic, one that could be upsetting for others, so please remember to be respectful and considerate to others when discussing it.

[nothing0fnothing]

My mom always used to tell me that I was so much more mature than the boys my age because "girls mature faster" and always told me to date older when I started dating.

The men in my family would tell me that the best way for me to succeed was to 1) get really thin 2) get really hot 3) marry an elderly man months from death 4) inherit his money after he died.

Constant discussions about how I shouldn't be dating teenage boys because teenage boys "only want one thing" and I should be waiting to date till my mid 20s when they've "calmed down".

But yeah it was totally my fault when a man in a position of power over me in his late 20s started dming me when I was 13 and I thought it was normal.

[wildflowercryptid]

something that's been weighing on my mind ever since learning about the situation with ezra / toonimal is seeing how these predators will take the active hostility that is frequently directed towards minors in online spaces to their advantage and use it to prey on vulnerable children. i think that we as adults in online fandom should probably come together and maybe rethink the language / manner we go about interacting with kids bc clearly the way things are rn is causing active harm.

like obviously, if you're an adult and aren't comfortable with minors interacting with you or your content, you should be allowed to set that boundary and should be vocal about it, ( especially if the content you create isn't safe for them to consume. ) but i don't think talking to them like they're a blight on all that is good and holy is the way to go about it. maybe just saying you're an 18 plus account will suffice, you don't have to tell them to fuck off.

[peachie-cottage]

THIS IS IMPORTANT. VERY IMPORTANT. PLEASE DO NOT SKIP PAST THIS AND PLEASE REBLOG. TW: GROOMING, SEXUALLY EXPLICIT IMAGES, SEXUALLY DRIVEN MESSAGES.

A user that goes by the name of @thelegendzapatacoll arrived in my DMs at around 4 am [i was asleep btw] and in the morning, i decided to respobd, because:

-I dont like to leave people on read n not respond it just seems rude

-He didnt seem like a bot

[here is the image proving that this happened lol]

Soon after, he almost immediately started asking about my personal info, as well as obvious sexually driven info

[more proof]

soon after he suggested sexting. He also confirmed himself to be an adult.

after, i declined his request to sext him, and even though i told him i was a minor, he still persisted, to which i tried to change the subject to food:

after which we had s conversation about food in general. I was trying to steer him away from a sexual conversation and at least give him a chance to realize his fatal mistake he was making.

up until which... it wasn't a mistake anymore..

soon after, i could no longer steer it away as he persistently messaged about his sexually driven interests, while still confirming to him i was a minor

in these messages, i tried to sound as neutral n as innocent as possible, to see how far he'd go

now with the rest of these messages, i don't even know what to say to this...

Now at that point, he was beginning to spam me because i was going AFK, taking these screenshots.

Once i had all the evidence i needed, i soon blocked him and made this post

Not even 30 minutes after me blocking him, he deleted his account, which didn't have much on it anyway, besides a few reblogs n some other stuff i cant remember.

THIS IS A WARNING, FOR EVERYONE.

BE CAREFUL ON THESE SITES. THINGS LIKE THESE CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE, AND CAN AFFECT EVERYONE DIFFERENTLY.

THIS COMMUNITY IS FULL OF MINORS, BE CAREFUL.

PLEASE, BE CAREFUL AND STAY SAFE.

[thelunarsystemwrites]

!Vent!

trigger warning, the following content discussion mental illness, trauma, child sexual abuse, swearing, victim blaming, aggressive behaviour. You have been warned.

Honestly I don't know what to be mad at.

Like, I was a kid. Who the fuck does that to a kid? In HIS own damn house! Why did that happen? Because I feel like I deserved it, or like it's my fault? I was a kid, i was old enough to talk and say no??

IT'S BEEN OVER TEN FUCKING YEARS why am I still afraid!? I'm so fucking pissed at myself because I haven't got over it.

BUT I WOULD NEVER SAY THAT SO SOMEONE ELSE!?

Just-

I dunno I'm tired.

I'm tired of holding myself to a higher standard than everyone else but I don't stop doing it?? And I'm fully aware of victim blaming right now but i feel like I deserve to be blamed, and if I ever told my family they'd hate me.

[skiddlecat]

i'm sorry but the fact yandev is like "i may have engaged in sexual misconduct with a teenager but i, a 35 year old man who definitely should have known better, was actually the one being groomed and i was the victim the whole time!!! also i'm probably autistic so all of my actions can be excused!!!!!!" is actually fucking crazy. BEING AUTISTIC DOESN'T MAKE YOU GROOM KIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[riftdancing]

Why do you hold me...

...like you always owned me?

Every time I try to escape...

You bring out the tape...

Then I bite 'till it breaks.

• PART ONE • PART TWO <-

If you are interested in this plotline and want to know more I've talked about it in depth in this post.

[allhailthequeenuwu]

Your Boyfriend - The Allegations of Fuboo & Her Husband By Queen Serafina

A Youtuber Queen Serafina has made a video about the YB Controversy, so pls go watch it now: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6vxJt8zT4g

[sacredtime]

TW: GROOMING AND PREDATORY RELATIONSHIPS!!!

Darlin in their teen years when they started rebelling against the pack and subsequently their parents started becoming friends with older people that seemed ‘trusting’ regardless of if they were empowered or not.

They would make these friends and not all of them were bad of course. They’d talk to teachers and friends parents who would give them the guidance and support they weren’t getting or the guidance and support Darlin didn’t feel like they were getting from the pack and their parents.

But then there were the adults they clung onto weren’t good characters. These awful people saw poor Darlin as a toy they could use for their own means. They would start by being someone they (Darlin) could vent to and get support from before things would go all wrong.

Darlin would get attached to these people, feeling like they belong around them, a stable place finally and they would be pushed into a relationship because they feel like they finally have stability. Only these awful people would make it worse and alienate them even more.

Darlin would rebel more with their parents because regardless of how you think Darlin’s parents are, they would probably be upset and concerned that their child is an dating adult and would try to keep the two apart and keep Darlin safe. Darlin’s so blind to the danger they’re in it feels like they’re losing an important part of their life again just like when their family moved to Dahlia.

This leads them to unfortunately meeting Quinn. While most of these people after they have their fun or the novelty of dating young Darlin leaves they throw Darlin away, but not Quinn. Quinn was the toxic thorn in Darlin’s side and it took Quinn attacking Darlin’s friend for them to end things this time and when the dust settles and what feels like the first time in forever they’re able to see clearly and how wrong the relationship was and how wrong their previous relationships were and the manipulation they faced not only from Quinn but all these other people who took advantage of their naivety.

And what hurts Darlin the most is now they’re truly alone. They don’t have the Shaw pack to fall back on, they don’t have their family to fall back on; and they couldn’t face anyone after that, no one from their past with how blind they were to everything and how cruel they were just to stay with people who used them so disgustingly.

Darlin was alone and had a mess to clean up not only to get revenge for their friend but themselves as well.

[nothing0fnothing]

Hey remember when that grown man molested and groomed me into thinking it was okay for like, almost 3 years and when everyone found out I got treated like I, the 13 year old child, was the bad one who broke the rules? And then I spiralled down into a pit of rage issues and bad mental health because nobody thought it might be necessary to get me help after such an ordeal so I just had to tough it out and work it out alone? and not just regular alone, like truly alone, because I was pulled out of every social extracurricular I was in and had all my hobbies taken off me as punishment so all I could really do was sit alone in my room thinking about everything I'd just gone through and how bad it was? and it was especially bad because it was summer and my parents were so angry at me they didn't talk to me basically at all so it just became normal that I went days to a week at a time without speaking to a human being the whole time, essentially leaving me alone in a time I should have been having conversations about what happened to me and how I can heal? And nobody talked about it at all for like 5 years and pretended it didn't happen to me and I had no reason to be sad and depressed and mentally ill because I had a perfect life? And literally the only evidence I had that what happened to me wasnt just forgotten was brought up was as a joke at my expense when I was 20 and moved out? And when I, a then 20 year old who still wasn't healed from that experience because why the fuck wouldn't I be? Said that the joke wasn't funny and acknowledged for the first time that it wasn't my fault I got met with some weird remark about how it was actually another 15 year olds fault because she also got groomed?

Yeah me neither idk why I brought it up.