#what if i fell apart and no one picked through the pieces to find what was left behind

[diariesofthelover]

A New Regular

synopsis: After his favorite bookstore in Gotham went out of business, Jason had to find a new one that he’d actually like. He decided to check out one a couple blocks down from his apartment in hopes that it’ll be a decent replacement, when he goes in he finds something worth coming back for.

notes: Jason Todd x reader, 3rd person pov, reader works at a bookstore.

Of course Jason’s favorite bookstore went out of business. It was a small store tucked away in one of Gotham’s less populated neighborhoods meaning that they never got enough sales and it didn’t help that their star customer was “dead” for a couple years.

Now he had to go searching for a replacement, god he had a strong dislike for that word, something that’ll at least be adequate enough since he knew that nothing could ever replace his original bookshop. Not with all the memories, the owners who knew him so well, the atmosphere, and that certain smell that brought him back to the last time where he actually felt happy. The place meant more to him than just a bookstore, it was a piece of his childhood that wasn’t tainted by anything, and now it’s gone.

His search began with another small shop that was only a few blocks down from his apartment, convenient. He wasn’t excited about this, no, he didn’t want to be doing this in the first place. His place should’ve never closed, it should still be there running and waiting for him, but it wasn’t which upset him more than he thought it would.

With a slight scowl on his face he made the walk to the unfamiliar bookstore by his apartment. Jason’s hood was up as usual, trying to keep his face away from people on the street for numerous reasons.

After a few minutes he made it to the possible replacement. It was nuzzled in between a cafe and a record store, fitting. It was small, smaller than the rest of the businesses on the block. With uncertainty Jason walked in, a doorbell sounded signaling his entrance. There were only a few other customers in the store, quietly picking out books to escape to, and no workers in sight.

“At least I won’t be bothered,” he thought to himself.

He headed straight for the classics, hoping to stumble upon a work he hasn’t read yet, practically impossible. As he searched through the novels he heard footsteps coming to this section, being who he was Jason was able to pick up on them several seconds before they got to where he was. When the steps came to a stop Jason looked up from the books to see who was near him now, was it curiosity, paranoia, or both?

What he faced was someone who was either an employee or an extreme book enthusiast as she was holding a stack of books that went so far up that her face was hidden behind the literature.

His first thought was to help, that’s the kind of guy he was or at least used to be, but he didn’t do anything as he looked away and went back looking for books to read. He wasn’t interested in meeting new people and talking to strangers anymore, even if they shared the same love for reading as he did. In fact, the idea alone made his stomach churn which is why he minded his business and kept to himself. People were probably better off without him in their lives anyway.

All of a sudden there was a crash as each book fell to the floor, the noise startling him a little.

“Shit,” he heard the girl swear under her breath as she squatted down to pick up the books.

Jason glanced over to her, she had a name tag signaling that she worked there as well as a defeated expression on her face. The longer he stood there not helping, the faster the guilt began to seep in.

God fucking damn it, fine.

Before he could even register what he was doing, Jason squatted down across from her helping her retrieve the dropped books.

“Oh thank you, you really didn’t have to,” she said shyly.

Jason didn’t respond, instead he gave her a slight nod as his way of saying, “no worries”. He was trying his best to avoid any eye contact and keep his eyes locked on the books but he couldn’t help but take a look at her face.

She was beautiful, fuck, so beautiful actually she may as well of come out of one of the novels she dropped. He quickly looked back down again hoping a blush hadn’t formed on his face, he knew that if he spoke now he’d stutter and make a fool out of himself.

She couldn’t help but steal a couple of glances of him as well. Her gaze went from book to him then back to the books then to his perfect face again. Some may have found him to look incredibly intimidating, most actually, and she did but she also thought him to be incredibly handsome. Maybe she’d been reading too much but he looked like he’d be a character from any of those classic romance novels that she loved.

Jason rose as he gathered the remaining novels. She looked up at him from where she was kneeling below him and to her he looked like god. Forget Austen’s novels, he was from a greek myth. His shoulders muscular and broad even under his red hoodie and brown leather jacket, his thighs thick with muscles hidden under the denim, and his height…well he was certainly tall, much taller than she. She had to be mindful of her facial expressions as she gawked at him for far too long.

He tried to make himself look smaller, tried to relax his muscles and hunch over. He didn’t want to intimidate her or scare her off. After being resurrected, his body began to change rapidly. Yes puberty kicked in but the lazarus pit was like an intense steroid resulting in him being huge, an absolute unit.

Sure, he liked how he looked when he was suited up as Red Hood but when he was without his mask and armor, he left like a brute. His size made him feel like some sort of monster. He didn’t want to scare good people away, especially women, but he knew he appeared incredibly intimidating to them all regardless of what he wanted.

And the scars, god that was the worst part for him. His body is scattered with them from all the fighting he’s done and violence he’s endured, his face not left unmarked either. As a kid, he thought they were cool, that it meant that you were strong and a survivor, now it makes him feel weak and reminds him of what has happened to him and what he became as a result. Each scar held a story, not the kinds he wants to be reading about.

All of these thoughts were swirling in Jason’s head as the bookstore worker looked up at him in what he thought was horror and disgust.

To his surprise she stood up with half of the novels in her hands with a sweet smile on her face.

“Thank you again, that was very kind of you,” she softly said still with a smile on her perfect face.

Jason hadn’t been called kind in awhile, it caught him off guard for a moment as a small smile broke out on his face.

“No problem,” was all he chose to say as he handed her the rest of the books.

“Do you need help finding anything? I practically know where everything is, especially in this section,” she let out a small laugh.

“I,” he cleared his throat, “I’m just browsing, thank you,” his deep voice contradicted his shy tone as he turned his back to her before she could see the blush that threatened to paint his structured face.

“Okay, well just let me know you if need anything, I’ll be around,” she said a little awkwardly.

Disappointed, she went over to the shelf behind Jason to do her job.

The two couldn’t help but look over their shoulders to sneak glances at one another, never catching each other in the process.

She only had one more book left to put away, Frankenstein. Of course, it was on the same shelf that Jason was currently browsing through.

“Excuse me, sorry,” she came up behind him to slip the last novel on the shelf. Jason stepped to the side giving her space, his eyes caught on the book in her hand.

She noticed his possible interest and stopped herself from returning it to its place.

“Oh, did you want to see this one?” She had a hopeful expression on her face as she reached the book out for him to take.

Jason read Frankenstein when he was younger but he hadn’t gone back to it since his death, he feared that it would hit too close to home. He didn’t want to relate to the monster, especially as much as he did, he wanted things to be different. He’d oftentimes fantasize about a life where he didn’t get killed or at least a world where Batman avenged him, these fantasies only screwed with his head more. Maybe it was time for him to really look at reality through a fictional lens, maybe it could help him figure some shit out.

Jason accepted her offer, his calloused fingers brushing against hers when he grabbed the book.

“Thank you,” he mumbled as he examined the new cover.

“I really enjoyed that one, it’s actually one of my favorites,” she beamed but got no response from Jason. She quickly grew embarrassed as she felt that he was bothered by her talking and overall presence. In reality, he wanted to hear more. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she turned away ready to leave him alone.

“Why’s that?” He suddenly asked causing her to turn back around again, his focus still on the book in his large hands.

Caught off guard she took awhile to respond, “The story, the character, well everything about it really I could go on and on.”

Jason finally looked at her, his cheeks heated but he didn’t care he wanted to talk to her.

“I’m listening.”

The pair went on to discuss the book that they both had a love for. Luckily, the store remained relatively dead and no one intruded on their conversation. Jason was mesmerized by the way she spoke and the way she thought. She was charmed by how good of a listener he was and his own takes.

For the next couple hours they had jumped from book to book, connecting pieces of their personal lives to literature, it was their way of getting to know each other.

He felt silly for ever worrying about finding a place that at least was decent. He ended up finding a treasure, one worth coming back for again and again.



[dragonofthemountain]

vent or something

[writingoddess1125]

The old men of One Piece finding out they have a child with you. Pt. 2

Due to popular demand I have a part two for you guys!

Shanks, Buggy, Mihawk xFemreader

Healthy Mix of Angst and Fluff

Support me on Ko-Fi

Part 1 <- -> Part 3

Buggy

The crew was quick to follow orders, Cabaji grabbing you as others grabbed your sons. Dragging you from the restaurant you called a home and out onto the streets, screamed fill the air as the village was being ripped apart. Your boys crying out in fear as the crew harshly brought you onto the ship you once were apart of.

You yelped as you were thrown into Buggy's room. Your boys being tossed in as well, you quickly grabbed Dee and Bee and brought them to your chest. Running your hands through their hair as they sobbed against you, shaking like a leaf and terrified.

"Ssshh it's okay my loves it's okay" you whisper trying to soothe them, holding them tightly to try and ward away the bad dream. After a few hours they finally fell asleep, You carefully rolling up and placing them on Buggy's large bed. It wouldn't be best to let them sleep in your arms since they were fairly large and when asleep could kick and roll. You couldn't risk injury if you were going to escape with the twins.

You tucked them into the big stripped bed and sighed- Surrounded by more of this circus shit made them look way more like Buggy then you cared to admit. Smoothing Dee and Bee wild blue locks with your hand you sighed heavily. Trying to come up with a plan to escape- but the plotting was short lived as the bedroom door opened.

Buggy stared at you and then glanced at the boys as they slept soundly in his bed. He was holding a large tray and set it down on the side table, meeting your eyes as he picked up a fork and took a bite from each both and even a bite of the bread, before taking a seat clearly wanting to show it was safe to eat and feed the children. You looked at the food it was 3 healthy servings of pasta with fresh bread and 3 drinks, 2 milks and a ale. You looked at him in question but you didn't dare voice anything. Instead gently shaking the twins awake-

"Eh? Mom?..." Dee mumbled as he rubbed his sleepy eyes. "Dinner is here" You say calmly, holding a bowl out to Dee who gently took it in his tiny hands before waking up Bee with a bit more force and doing the same. Splitting the bread in half and giving each half to your sons to make sure they had full bellies.

You ate your own food, Watching as the twins hungrily ate there like they hadn't had a meal before, havjng to make sure they didnt mess up the nice bed. However you kept glancing back at Buggy, feeling his eyes on you.

He sat across the room stull, watching you closely as you wiped their faces clean with your dress and handing them their drinks and even taking your own ale and sipping it. You saw Bee wat hibg Buggy closely, the two staring at each other silently.

"What are you looking at Old Man?-" Bee snapped as he glared at Buggy. You snapping your finger quickly at him.

"Attitude-" You hissed in warning. However heard a shuffle to see Buggy snorting a laugh and turning away to giggle-

"Damn these really are my Kids- I was at least 90% sure before but now it's 100%!" He laughed, actually Wiping the tears from his face.

"Mom what is he talking about?" Dee questioned first, raising a brow at the Clown in their room.

"Yeah and whats with hi-" You smacked your hand over your sons mouth. Knowing that the following question would lead to a fight you didn't have the strength for.

"Boys this is your father... Buggy the Clown. He's a Pirate Captian"

"Our Dads a clown-" Bee deadpanned as his face looked at you in what can only be described as confused horror. You sighing mentally by this, as Dee stared at Buggy suspiciously.

"How do we know?-" Dee started, But Buggy pulled the hat from his head and bandana to show his blue locks that were identical to their.

"Our Dads a Clown!?" Bee said again this time

"I'm a porate clown-" Buggy shot back as he frowned at the boy. The two locking in gaze of equal stubbornness and attitude.

Dee started to say"Is that why you took us?" But was cut off gloriously by Bee"If you're our dad then you suck! Why did you grab mom by her hair and make her cry!" He proclaimed, Jumping up on the bed and pointing to Buggy angrily. You urging the boy to sit down, But Buggy's gaze softened.

"I apologize- I didn't see it was her or else I would have never raided you town. Instead just picked you three up to take with me" He admitted calmly. The seemed to take the wind from Bee's sails as he sat back down- You also surprised to hear Buggy apologize or be so vulnerable.

"I want to have you three here with me and be apart of my children's life" Buggy started as he stared at you- You started to protest but he held up a hand.

"60 Days, that's all I ask. If in 60 days you don't want me in their lives I'll drop you and the boys off at a Marine Base with some berry. Enough to be comforble for the rest of your lives"

It was a good deal- a damn good deal. It's not like you had a berry to your name or a place to return to. That and he genuinely seemed interested in the boys, you gave a defeated sigh.

"Alright... 60 days- then we will talk from there" Buggy smiled at hearing you agreeing to this. Excitement shining in his eyes as he jumped up from his seat.

"Perfect! You all rest here. I'll leave and bring some supplies for you all" Buggy said calmly as he stood up and quickly left, a grin plastered on his face as he left you.

You should have known that Buggy was planning something. For the next 3 days it was like he turned the ship into a child's dream. There was suddently a absurd about of toys, sweets, every game imaginable too seemed to have suddently appeared. Buggy all to happy to shower the twins in anything they asked for, played any game they wanted.

You inwardly sighed as you watched the twins start to warm up to Buggy, More like clinging to him. Bee seemingly the most interested in him while Dee seemed to just love sailing. Having to be coaxed down from the crows nest were he would hide all day. At the mess hall however is were they fit in the best- It was like Buggy had cloned himself the two perfect best friends, aka himself.

Dee had taken to keeping his hair up due to his time in the crows nest and also had become more confident- pushing his brother back whenever he messed with him a bit too much- As for Bee it was like Buggy 2.0- Loud, flashy and ready to find trouble. It had been only 3 days but so much had changed, Currently it being evening dinner time.

Sitting next to Buggy in the mess hall, who had made it a habit of keeping you close you glared as your son then Buggy who was just laugjing "Benny (Y/L/N) get your monkey ass here right now!" You yelled as you saw your son running down the tables of the mess hall. Singing a made of sea shanty that the rest of the freaks were actually drinking and singing along to.

"Let the boy have some fun (Y/N)! It's not like he's hurting anyone- Besides what's the worse that can happen! Stop with the snooty attitude" Buggy proclaimed with a laugh, you saw Dee get a mischievous look in his eye before slipping under the table. You give a sarcastic smile, knowing your twins all too well.

"Fine then, I won't be snooty for the next hour whatever they damage you gotta clean" You proposes with a smile. He laughed and nodded.

"Deal! Finally now we can have some fu-"

And like a symphony of madness all hell broke lose. Dee had popped put from under the table and grabbed Bee's foot nid step. The singing child falling into a massive bowl of mashed potatos which managed to spray everywhere- coating all the people at the table in potatos and the floor which made a few Crewmates who had been walking slip and slam into tables flinging more food and creating more mess paired with a hunk of cake landing right in Buggy's face. Wiping the frosting as he watched the two boys make a run from the mess hall cackling like two Imps.

"Boys!!" He yelled, trying to wipe more of the pink frosting from his face. You smiled and handed him a napkin.

"Have fun Captian!~" You said with a grin and patted his shoulder as Buggy sat there red faced and glaring at you half heartedly. As if taking your cue, you got up and left. Giggling as you hear Buggy snap at some crewmates to grab something to help clean the mess.

Deciding to take the time for yourself you went to the main deck. Leaning against the rails as you watched the dark waves of the ocean and the setting sun. You couldn't lie and say you didn't miss the ocean, or the time to yourself. You stood there watching as the sun set and plunged the ship into darkness, the lanterns of the ship turning on as well as the ship seemed to be sailing in darkness.

"Enjoying your free time?" A deep voice snapped you from your thoughts. Seeing Buggy walking towards you, his face washed of makeup and hair in a ponytail. Having clearly just bathed after getting the mess hall cleaned.

"Yeah, I forgot how nice it is being on this ship.. How are the boys?" Buggy smiled at hearing you enjoying yourself before shrugging.

"Got them washed up and put them to bed.....They seem to like me" He boated, seemingly proud he had formed such a strong bond.

"That they do" You reply. Watching as he put his hands in his pockets a bit awkwardly, that tough Captian Facade crumbling a bit under his own anxiety.

"(Y/N) Why did you leave?... Was it me? Were you ashamed of me or-" He started, the back of his hand brushing against his nose as the enxiety slammed into his chest.

"What?.. No that's not why I left Buggy- I was scared. How the hell was I suppose to go through pregnancy on a ship? Hell the labor?! That was 36 hours to give birth to both of them!" Buggy winced at the thought, you leaned against the railing and stared at him.

"It was the fact that I couldn't predict how you would react and no idea how to raise a baby here. So in a village with at least some stability seemed like the best option- Even if it ment having to do it alone"

You admit, Buggy messing with his gloved hands. Sadness bleeding through his gaze as he sighed.

"I suppose- I can see your point... but I would have put everything on hold if I knew-" Buggy admitted, before rubbing the back of his head a bit hesitantly.

"You know- We only got 60 days and I've been wanting to take a vacation. Drop off the crew maybe for a bit and I know this really nice island" Buggy said casually. Your eyebrows raising at hearing this- He wanted to stop pirating just for you and the twins?

"What?-" You started but he cut you off quickly. "I mean it would only be a little bit of course- unless something urged me to stay a bit longer. However I think being on the open ocean can be damaging for super long term- I mean the meals can cause scurvy and who knows what else" He quickly justified, even at this distance you could see his ears turning red. You couldn't help but giggle at this, which caught his attention quickly.

"I'd like that Buggy.. But I don't want to take you away from what you love" you say, Watching Buggy take a hesitant step towards you.

"Who knows... 60 days can quickly turn into eternity.. if you want it to.. and i lost what i loved once- Ill never let that happen again" He said locking eyes with you which made you smile brighter.

Shanks

It had been 3 weeks since Shanks arrived- and it had been one journey, The man clearly loved to be a father. Willing to do anything for Vivian, her having the powerful pirate wrapped around her little finger and not even knowing it.

Shanks having let his crew take the time for essentially a vacation on his dime while ge stayed in your guestroom. Excited every morning to wake up and play with his daughter. He bought her so many toys, a chest full of pretty dresses, a giant stuffed monkey and a play wood sword since she had been so interest in his.

She had even taken to tying her favorite green ribbon on his sword since "It looks pretty" and he didn't have the will power to take it off. So for the most part, it had been complete and total bliss.

It was early morning when you heard some loud Noises coming from the kitchen area of your home- Getting up from bed and put on your robe and walked to see what all the noise was.

You stood in the kitchen with a raised eyebrow, the only word fitting this situation was- Hilarious. There sat Shanks, sat on the floor with his back leanes against the oven holding a old muffin. His eyes were covered in a thick layer of green glittery eyeshadow (from your makeup bag) hot red lipstick that was sneered on other parts of his face. Some bows randomly scattered in his red hair. His coat that usually covered his missing arm dropped over your daughter who was still in her baby blue tight gown and she was dragging behind her as she adding things to the spread on the floor. A bag of sugar, some water, a scattering of teabags and whatever had been in the fridge- including half eaten sandwiches and cupcakes which Shanks was currently chewing on.

"Starlight, I don't think there is anyway you can make the wate- I mean tea any sweeter" He said calmly, Watching Vi try to pour more sugar into her little China set with her chubby hands. Shanks cringing a bit at this as she poured him a cup and handed it to him.

"See! Now it's perfect!" She chimed and giggled loudly. He gave a smile as he set aside his muffin and sipped the tea, trying to suppress the cringe from the unholy amount of sugar that was mixed with water and a hint of a poor teabag.

"It's delicious Baby Girl- Fantastic" He choked out, working through a smile as he forced himself to take another sip. You couldn't help bit to laugh, which brought the attention of both Red Heads.

"Mommy!" Vivian chimed loudly running towards you still wearing Shank's cloak and you scooped her up carefully.

"I must say Shanks, you look fabulous" You said with a smile. Shanks Grinning up at you as he sat on the floor.

"I always thought I'd look good in green" He said, Gesturing to the sloppy eyeshadow. Rolling himself up to his feet as he smiled down at you.

"By the way are you ready for today?" You raised a brow-

"Oh boy what do you have planned?" Shanks only gave a wide smile before grabbing a box from the kitchen table and holding up a lovely yellow sundress for you and a similar one for Vivian.

"Fun day out!"

Shanks hadnt beem kidding about a fun day, staring with a lovely resturant on the island, sailing, having in a meadow and then time out at the park the sun started to set. Shanks held Vivian who was passed out against him, walking back to your home. The two of you talking about the time you two where together in the past.

"Thank you (Y/N).." He said softly, Smiling as he watched the sun set and the two of you walked up hill.

"For what?" He smiled brightly at you "Making me the happiest man in the world" You couldn't help but blush at hearing this. Looking away bashfully as you came up to your home, Seeing a man standing there a bit awkwardly.

"Yasopp! Glad you stopped by, This is (Y/N) and my darling daughter Vivian. She's asleep right now but I'm sure she'd love to meet ya"

Shank smiled brightly at seeing his fellow crewmate. However the look on Yasopp face said otherwise.

"Its lovely to meet you (Y/N)... but Captian- we have to talk.." He said softly, Shanks frowning at the tone he gave before gently passing Vivian to you.

"I'll be in a sec" He said, nodding you quickly head inside to get Vivian ready for bed. Yasopp and him talked outside, Shanks looked angry. Staring at the letter and running his hand through his hair clearly stressed. You finished cleaning Vivians face and got her in her PJs, tuckering her in for the night. In the hallway you could hear the should of bottles shifting, turning to see Shanks in the kitchen grabbing the bottle of whiskey you kept on the top shelf- his face twisted in anger as he plopped on the couch.

"You have to leave.. don't you-" You finally blurted out, watching him open the bottle with his teeth and take a sip. His eyes shiny with unshed tears, he nodded soberly as he took a hard swig of the drink.

"Shanks you can't finally meet her and just leave her life-" You stressed, anger bubbling in your chest as you stared at him. He sat slunched in the chair a swirling of different emotions in his eyes.

"They need my help.. and I can't risk it (Y/N).... I can't risk them finding out about you and Vi... they would kill you both" He whispered, shock slamming into you. Your eyes drifting to Vivian's room were she laid sleeping.

"...How long will you be gone" You whispered finally, sitting down on your sofa sadly.

"I don't know..." He whispered, defeat written on his face. Holding the bottle out to you, which you took and started to sip before passing it back.

"When do you leave?" Shanks took another heavy swig of the drink and held it out to you. "Tomorrow morning..." You nod at this- Taking another sip of the whiskey.

"...I-Is she going to hate me?" Shanks whispered, Looking up at were he knew Vi was. You shook your head "She doesn't have it in her heart to hate.." You said softly. He nodded at this and messed with the ribbon she tied on his sword, staring at it hard.

"I love her (Y/N).... so much it hurts.." His voice cracked. But he instead stood up, taking a heavy breath.

"I'm going to get some sleep... you should as well" He said softly, Turning and walking back to the guest room. Leaving you alone with the whiskey bottle, as you put it back in its rightful place. You could have sworn you heard hushed sobs... but left them be and went to cry in your own bed as well.

In the morning, the nice breakfast was made. Shanks feeding Vivian her oatmeal and letting her talk his ear off, you knew he needed this moment. Needed to have this with her. Once breakfast was finishes the three of you started the walk to the docks, Vivian holding Shanks hand as they talked about the pretty ocean.

Walking to the docks he saw the ship being loaded up, Vivian staring in awe at the massive vessel and giggled at the sight of all the men who stared at her and gave friendly waves. Shanks taking a deep breath to look at you both. Hurt shining in his eyes as he swallowed a hard lump in his throat. Kneeling down he looked at Vivian, his hand cupping her chubby cheek as he took a shaky breath holding back tears clearly. "Princess, I've got to go for a while.."

"But why?... you just got here?"

"I know baby girl- But, see there is this trouble maker- His name is Luffy. Think of him as your big brother, he needs my help.. And I don't want to put you and your Mommy in danger while I go get him. So I have to leave-"

He said, Biting his bottom lip for a second as he let a few tears roll down his cheek. Reaching into his pocket and pulling out a solid gold coin- it was quite large and he carefully handed it to Vivian. Her little fingers holding the big coin and touching the detailed design thay decorated it, his Jolly Roger.

"But I promise I'll be back.. but until I do- you have to keep this with you. It's special, it will protect you from Pirates- And when I come back, and I promise I will. I'll trade you that coin for your ribbon back okay?"

He said softly, watching Vivian smile up at him at the promise.

"Okay Daddy.." She said softly before jumping and hugging around his neck. He held her tightly, wrapping his arm around her as if he didn't want to let go.

"Captian-" Yassop said softly, Shanks nodding and carefully standing up. Handing Vivian to you a bit reluctantly, Vivian own eyes starting to water. You held her close as tears rolled down your own cheeks. Shanks leaning in and kissing the tears on your face and one gingerly on your lips.

"I'll see you two again, I swear" He said softly, Stepping back as he followed after his crew. The crew somber like their Captian as he boarded, yelling out commands to set sail. Looking back as the ship began to leave the harbor, Waving at the two of you. Vivian waving back gently as tears rolled down her chubby cheeks clutching the coin close to her chest.

You and Vivian standing on the docks as you watched the ship sail and disapear over the horizon. You sniffles and wiped your eyes of the tears you didn't know had still been running down your cheeks.

Your daughter looking at you and wiping your tears, giving you a smile just like Shanks "Don't worry Mommy.. Daddy said he'd be back"

Mihawk

You stood in your tiny kitchen, rubbing your temple as the days situation settled on your bones. Your son standing next to you chopping vegetables silently, Clearly ignoring the elephant in the room.

"Alucare- Do you want to-"

"No" He cut you off quickly, quickly cutting down on a carrot like it had wronged him. You sighed at this setting the kettle on the stove to start a pot of tea. Knowing damn well what was coming- right on cue there was a knock to the door.

Turning you went to let in the Warlord, he looked like a kicked puppy. Awkwardly standing there at your door with his hat removed, his eyes glancing up at you hesitantly.

"(Y/N)..." He said softly, surprising you that he had even remembered your name. He stepped to the side, inviting him into your home and guiding him to your dining room were he took a seat at the kitchen table.

You took a seat as well, Alucare not turning from preparing the vegetables. A awkward silence following the trio as there was only the sound of chopping.

"Mihawk.. It's been a while" You finally speak, the Warlord nodding in agreement. Silence falling over you two again.

"Oh for God's sake. Alucare sit down please, we are going to get this out" You said, Hearing the shuffle of your son moving from his spot and sitting next to you. You couldn't help but stare in awe- The two sitting across from each other made it seem like they were looking at some odd mirror, they looked almost identical except for the age and minor changes.

"Mihawk this is Alucare, your son. As we can clearly can see. Alucare this is your father Dracule Mihawk"

You introduce, swallowing thickly as the two continued to stare at each other. Silence falling again over you all, Mihawk sighed and rubbed his temple. Turning his eyes away from this odd sort of staring contest.

"Alucare.. That's a good name.. How old are you?" Mihawk asked, staring at his child for a moment before Alucare looked away.

"I'm 16..." He said softly, Mihawk nodding at this before his eyes landed on you.

"How come you didn't tell me- I would have been here, helped you. I have a home and more" He asked, his eyebrows betraying him in pure confusion and he frowned. You sighed and rubbed the back of your neck.

"I was scared- How would it look like if some random person claimed to have some famed Warlords child.." You mumbled, still embarrassed by the whole ordeal. "Besides it wasn't even until after are alleyway escapades that I understood who you were-"

"I see..." Mihawk sighed as he stared at Alucare again, who seemed to grow a bit uncomforble at the direction of this conversation.

"Alucare do you wish to ask something of your father?-" You encouraged. Wanting to create a olive branch between the two.

"What is there me to ask? It's not like it's a secret that we are related or his reputation. The only thing I would wonder is how you found out about us-" Alucare said a bit dismissively, you felt genuine surprise at this. He had never shown anyone disrespect before until now-

"There were rumors of you that traveled to a Marine Base I was at- how a child looked like the famed Mihawk... eyes and all" Mihawk clarified. Alucare only rolling his matching yellow eyes at this, standing up from his seat.

"I'll be dismissing myself. Thanks for the talk" He said calmly, walking out the back door and slamming it shut behind him. You sighed and looked to Mihawk

"Hes normally not like that, I don't know what to say" You admit. But the Warlord just stood up with a understanding nod.

"Hes angry... that I understood.. I'll return" He said before following out the back door as well.

Standing by the grove of trees next to the house Alucare let the cool blade of the knives brush over his fingers, sighing as he quickly released the blade at lightning speed at the carved target on the old tree hitting bulls eye. Alucare walking to retrieve the lone blade and repeat the process.

"Impressive shot-" The deep voice only belonging to Mihawk sounded behind the teen. Alucare glancing back at the man as he resumed his position and went back to throwing his blade.

"Thanks I suppose-" Alucare mumbled as he continued to task. Mihawk sighing softly as he glanced at the sky.

"What is the true reason you resent me- One that you don't wish to express with your mother around" He finally asked, staring at the sky. Alucare faltering in his movements for a moment, keeping the blade in his hands for a moment.

"If you had been anyone else she wouldn't have had to suffer so much-" He admitted, his eyes showing a deep sadness as he sighed "I saw the way they looked at her, despite her smiling and ignoring it.. how she acted as a human shield for me. Because we share blood- How she would sit on the bed after working day and night to put that home over our head... how tired she was and then emotionally carying the brunt of people looking at her in either pity, fear otlr disgust for my sake"

He admitted, throwing the blade once again watching the blade stick deeply into the tree the handle being the only thing that showed. Mihawk quietly listened and clenched his hands.

"I understand... if I had known I would have protected her... I would have protected you- Nothing I can say can make up for 16 years of hardship... but I do apologize" Mihawk said, bowing his head gently.

Alucare looked at him silently for a moment. Looking away for a moment and went to grab the blade.

"...How do you sharpen a blade-" Alucare asked, In his own way accepting Mihawk apology and extending a form of communication. Mihawk gave a hint of a smile on his lips as he stepped forward.

"I can show you-"

Tag List-

For all the people who requested Pt. 2

@lunanight1021 @lolavegas20 @cuteastrash @thatcharmingmushroom @marsilis @thesadvampire @amecchii @zaphira-san @matronofthevoid @mothmans-left-nipple

[luvmila444]

can u make a story where chris takes reader on a shopping spree in victoria secret and he watches her try on underwear sets in the fitting room until he can’t take it anymore and fucks her! ☺️☺️

Victoria’s Secret- C.S

…………………………………………….. ☆ ★ ………………………………………………

Chris sturniolo x fmreader

summary: going on a shopping spree takes an unexpected but please try turn as chris becomes eager with lust after seeing you in a new set on lingerie.

content warning: SMUT; p in v; unprotected sex (stay safe!); cumming inside; mirror sex; dom chris; fingering; public (kinda?); cum eating; ass slapping; no use of y/n; ‘ma’ nickname is used

word count: 1.6k words

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

Considering chris has almost completely destroyed and ripped apart every good piece of lingerie you have owned, you were always desperate to buy new pairs. This was never an issue for you though because the way wearing sexy lingerie made you feel so confident and hot and was always worth it, along with the absolute awe stuck state that was Christopher Owen Sturniolo when he saw you all dressed up pretty and slutty for him. 

You had considered making this a surprise for your boyfriend but chris was quick with stuff like this and had almost begged to come with you to pick out his favourite pairs of underwear on you. You could almost never say no to him so of course he came along with you knowing he would pay for everything. 

You were in the dressing room of Victoria Secret trying on the many pairs of scandalous and revealing pieces as possible. When it came to a beautiful pink set you had been dying to get after seeing it in the catalogue, you had been almost too eager to put it on. However, the clasps at the back were different and now you had tried everything you could to attach the back of the bra, but it just would not come together. Chris’s was right outside practically on the edge of his seat waiting to see each of the sets, he wouldn’t mind helping you put this one together…would he?

“Fuck…Chris, could you help me in here for a second, please?” You asked so sweetly it was almost like honey dripping from your lips and pouring into the desperate boy's ear. He didn’t even register himself standing and making his way to the dressing room that you had concealed yourself in.

 Stepping inside, chris seeing you almost completely naked for him, yet concealed in such beautifully expensive fabric. You looked so perfect, like something right out of the magazines. The shade of pink you wore complemented your skin tone so nicely, bringing out the blush on your cheeks from the shyness you had felt from Chris’s powerful and dominant stare. He loved the image before him. You stood facing the mirror, your hair over one shoulder to expose your bare back and the unclasped bra, which you gripped in your fingers, awaiting Chris’s help. He couldn't take his eyes off your body in the reflection. 

His hands reached down and pulled together the clasp slowly, encasing your breasts in the expensive fabric.

"Thank you." you brushed down the sides of the body, adjusting it into place to allow it to become more comfortable. "What do you think?" Looking up at Chris behind you through the reflection. His hands slid up over your ass, up your sides, resting on your breasts to give them a squeeze.

 "I think..." he leaned down to run his hands back over your curves again, "I'm about to rip this to shreds and have my way with you."

You smiled through the mirror, shaking your head at him. "Oh, stop. We're in public. Seriously, what do you think of the set?"

A wicked and playful smirk spread across his face as his hands fell on your hips. He fiddled with the sides of your pink lace panties teasingly feeling your sides over the fabric. He shoved his hand into the front of them, his large fingers instantly finding your clit. He stroked over it in slow circles, watching your face contort in the reflection. Chris’s other hand found its way back up to your chest, reaching in to grab a handful of your breast.

Feeling moisture pool between your folds, he dug deeper between your legs, shoving two fingers inside of you. You yelped at the feeling. "Now, now, ma, you have to be quiet if we're going to do this." He whispered in his playful voice. You bit her lip, nodding at him eagerly in response.

His fingers pushed further into you, finding their home pressed against her most sensitive spot. You leaned back to his chest as he crouched forward to accommodate for their height difference.

You looked like you were being tortured, the way your face scrunched up as he jabbed into her. He felt you starting to drip onto his palm and your walls clench.

Pulling his fingers from you abruptly, he spun you around by your shoulders to face him. Looking down at your cleavage, he grew angry by the fabric covering you from him. He grasped the part in which had covered your beautiful tits from him and yanked in open, ripping the bra in half. "Chris." you cried, jaw slack by the shock of what he just did.

"It's a fucking piece of material. I'll pay for it." He twisted her back around to face the mirror, now enjoying the view so much more. Picking up his movements, you let out a needy sigh. "Now, be a good girl for me and cum."

"I will." You whispered in a pathetically whiney voice. "Just don't stop. Please."

You felt his cock, as hard as possible pressed against your ass. You rubbed back onto it, eliciting a low breath to escape from his lips. "Ahh fuck, ma." Were Chris’s last words before pulling your underwear to the side, listening to the seem tear, and fully enter you from behind. You haven’t even seen or heard him get his cock out, but he must have been fast from how desperate and eager he had seemed after he say you.

He gripped your waist tightly and he watched you both in the large mirror of the dressing room. He pounded into you relentlessly watching as your perfectly carved ass bounced of of him. 

Chris sent a light quiet slap to your ass cheek and you felt like you were in literal heaven. Your head fell back onto his shoulder, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you gripped his arms that held you close to him. 

“No ma, look me in the eyes while I’m fucking you,” he said in your ear so low that nobody else would hear. Your mouth fell open, awaiting a loud moan which was quickly muffled by Chris’s hand.

Your ass continued to bounce on his dick, as chris loved his mouth from your ear to the side of your neck, beginning to suck harshly at your delicate skin, while still remaining eye contact in the mirror in front of you.

“Fuck, chris baby, i-im gonna cum…f-fuck,” your words although still slightly muffled were perfectly clear to chris while he felt you clenching and tightening around him. You struggled to hold your eyes open as Chris’s hand moved up from your waist to your exposed tit and began to play with your nipples.

"Cum. Now." He had stated so clearly as he pinched your sensitive bud.

You did. Instantly. That was your breaking point. You squeezed him tight, gushing down on his cock, dripping over him. He kept his grip tight over her breast to hold you up while she wiggled up against him this now making chris reach his climax as well, shooting hot spurts of his cum into you. You stared at him through the mirror, the sight of him alone helping her along and intensifying your climax. You bit down on her lip as chris removed his hand to muffle her moan that still lingered on your lips, but a small one slipped out but it was too quiet for anyone around you two to hear. You both rode out your orgasms together, continuing to remain under each others intense stare. Panting heavily as you came down, he slipped his cock from your pussy and released his tight hold on you. Blinking through your haze, you leaned up against the wall, body weakened from your intense release.

Chris stood back admiring his work. He lifted his hand to his mouth, covered in the sheen of you cum which he had wiped from your sensitive folds. He licked each finger and his palm, lapping up any taste of you he could get. His eyes rolled back at the taste. His favorite. The one he couldn't get off his mind all morning while he tried to work in a room full of his brothers.

"Did that answer your question about the set?"

You let out a laugh, running your fingers through your hair. "I'll need another one now that this one is destroyed." Pulling the shreds of fabric off your shoulders.

You're both piled up everything she wanted and took it to the register after getting dressed back into your regular clothes. The cashier gladly rung everything up, pleased by your haul of clothing. Bralettes, corsets, garters. All of it to your taste of course. 

 At the end of the transaction Chris remembered the wad of fabric in his hand.

"This too." He dropped it onto the counter, staring smirking at the woman behind it, daring her to question him.

You turned pinker than the set placed infront of you when she stared down at the rumpled piece of lace. She felt bad for Chris' unapologetic behaviour, but this was very usual for him to flaunt you and the work he had done infront of everyone.

Without saying a word, she rang up the shreds of the dress. Swiping the sleek black card from Chris’s Prada wallet, she thanked you, mainly chris who had payed for everything, for your business and sent you on your way.

The second your feet hit the sidewalk; you busted out laughing at the interaction. She figured the poor lady would be scarred for a while over it. Falling into Chris’s side as you both giggled to each other. 

Fuck, you loved your days spent with Chris

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

A/n: i have been meaning to write this for literally the longest time ever (since i saw the request)!! I loved this idea so much but was just sop busy that i havent written in agesssss!! Pls send more requests because i loved writing this .

Ily my angels 💞

Tag list: @gamermattsgf @lovingmattysposts @mattsrootbeer @myl0vef0rj0hnny @luv4kozume @liz-stxrn @mattestrella @strawberrysturniolo @strniohoeee @itzdarling @skyslondon @3iysian @robins-scoop @chrizz333 @sstvrnioloo @chrizz333 @sturnioloenthusiast @mattslolita@annamcdonalds67 @mixvchelle

[kittyhui]

exes to lovers! seungcheol x reader

!!MDNI!!

[seungcheol ended your five year long relationship seemingly out of nowhere, leaving you heartbroken. two years after your breakup, you release your solo album, song written about the heartbreak you felt. now, seungcheol is trying to get your love back]

cw: idol x idol, angst w/ comfort, semi public sex, not grammar checked well😭

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“I think we should break up” is all Seungcheol says to you, sad in his eyes.

He walks out of your apartment, not staying to listen to your cries and pleads, asking for an explanation on why he was so suddenly doing this. He was a completely different person from the last time you saw him; his love-filled eyes replaced with cold and sad ones.

You tried to contact him multiple times after that; calls and messages never answered, leaving you and your heart shattered, your members having to pick up the pieces. A five year old relationship gone in a flash, without a reason, without even a thought of why. Did i do something wrong? Did he grow tired? Was there.. someone else? The situation hurt you so badly, that even fans could tell something was wrong. Your relationship was a secret from fans and from your company, save from the members. Your performance during promotions were off and it took you almost a full year to get back on your game, taking a hiatus at one time because it was just so bad. but you were feeling better now. It’s now past your two year breakup anniversary, and though you think about the good times of your old relationship, you weren’t consumed with grief anymore. You felt much better, better than ever. Better enough to release your first solo album, songs written from that time.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

[interviewer] So, What was the thought process behind this album?

[Y/N] All these songs are a part of a giant collection of songs while i was going through a lot of feelings haha. Most of these were my inner thoughts and feelings that I couldn't express to anyone else so I wrote them out. they’ve only now came out because I was finally confident in myself and these songs after years and my members helped build my courage to share them with you all.

[Interviewer] I’m happy that you were finally able to overcome your fears with your songs.

[Y/N] Thank you so much

[Interviewer] Do you think you could go more in depth about the song meanings?

[Y/n] Yea, of course. The first song on the album can be interpreted in multiple ways in my opinion. When I wrote this, I was thinking about someone I loved truly. I wrote this wishing that the way they ended it could’ve been that we just fell out of love. I wanted us to be tired of each other, to just want it to be over and so I wrote this point of view wishing this was the reality, even though I knew how much I still loved them. It’s very sad and kinda pathetic but yea haha.

For the second track, I wrote this because in this same relationship, the way we broke up was so rushed and I was not ready for it. I felt like they didn’t even feel anything towards me anymore and it broke me down so much. By the end of the song, I kinda accept it as the end and try to let them go.

Ah~ This third track was actually wrote when i was first in that relationship. We were both falling hard and fast and I had to let it out in a way. I can’t really explain more.

[Interviewer] And lastly, the fully english track?

[Y/N] This one really talks about how even if I’ll be in another relationship in the future, I’ll only think about and try to find them in the other person. I wrote this the latest out of all of them. I knew I was still in love with this person even though it’s been years since the breakup but I know I’ll always see them as my first and only love even if they don’t see me the same way.

[Interviewer] These are all truly beautiful songs

[Y/N] Thank you

[Interviewer] We just have a few more questions before we say goodbye today. Firstly, You said these songs were in a collection of other songs, will you release the rest of them as well?

[Y/N] Maybe, I’m surprised I got away making this album so hopefully I can push my companies limits a tad more.

[Interviewer] Next question, This relationship you sing about seemed really intense. Was it a long one?

[Y/N] Yea, It dont think I can go into too many details but it was a pretty serious relationship. When it ended, I took it very hard. I liked them for a long time before too so it was rough haha

[Interviewer] Last question, Because you produce and write songs for your group, Have you ever wrote about this relationship in those songs?

[Y/N] Honestly I couldn’t tell you. I try not to because I’m still not the best about this relationship I was in but it’s probably slipped in a few songs unfortunately haha

[Interviewer] Thank you so much for coming onto my show today!

[Y/N] I’m honored to be asked here for an interview, thank you. I’d also like to say thank you to my fans and anyone else who is listening in! Please enjoy my new album!

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Needless to say, your interview was seen by alot of people. Neitzens have been picking it apart since it came out, speculating on the mystery person you were talking about. Your fans were both happy for you and angry for you; ready to fight the person who broke your heart. Though the publicity was great for your album sales and streams, the constant news was really tiring now, especially now that you were promoting at music shows. Music shows that your ex, S.Coups of Seventeen, was also promoting at with his group. Singing a song about your heartbreak in the same place of the person who hurt you so bad, was awkward to say the least. The waiting room of the music show was the worst. passing by him and his group makes your heart pound. His eyes follow you when you pass by each other. you try not to meet his eyes. Your heart just couldn’t handle it. Your still wanted him yet you hated him at the same time. You wanted to kiss him again but also wanted to hit him. The last conversation you both had together was him breaking up with you. He hurt you so badly yet you yearned for him.

So when he approached you before your performance, you felt conflicted.

“Y/n?” The familiar voice fills your ears and you look up at the man standing infront of your sitting figure.

“Seungcheol? What are you doing” You didn’t actually think he would speak to you again, but here he was.

“Can we- can we talk?” He pauses, licking his lips nervously “I know you probably never want to speak to me ever again but I just want a second of your time.”

“You really have horrible timing. I going on stage in a few minutes. Please don’t do this now. You had two years to talk about this,” You look away from his, glancing to the side “We can talk.. after the music show is over. Don’t expect too much, though” You stand and walk to the stairs of the stage and he sighs, agreeing to meet later on.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The music show ends entirely too quickly for your liking, leg bouncing nervously in your dressing room and when you hear a knock at the door you know it’s Seungcheol. You open the door, the man in front of you quickly walking in and closing the door again.

“Y/n..” He sighs

“Seungcheol,” You try to sound disinterested but inside you just want to hug him. “Please just say what you have to say”

“I just want to say I’m so sorry for the way I ended things. I know I hurt you beyond belief and it hurts that I hurt you. I watched your interview and.. god.. I care about you so much.. I never wanted to break up with you but I had to..” His eyes brim with tears and he lets out a haggard breath.

“Then why did you? Five years, Seungcheol. I loved you for five years, hell, I still love you after what you did, but, just why? I felt like I wasted all those years for nothing. I want to marry you… I wanted to have everything with you.. You were my first everything and you hurt me like I was nothing..” You were choking on your tears at this point, the salty liquid pooling in you lips “You were more than just a boyfriend to me, Seungcheol. You were the love of my life.”

“Y/n.. I.. I didn’t break up because I wanted to.. your company found out.. they threatened your career if I didn’t break up with you.. I tried to convince them to let us be, but they were persistent and my company was pressuring me as well.. I shouldve fought for you more.. I’m so sorry. I wanted to tell you what was happening but… I was a coward. I never stopped loving you, y/n.. You’re the love of my life too. I had every intention of being with you until the day I died, and I want to fight for you now even though I didn’t before.”

The shock of what he said lingers in your mind. You look at him without saying anything. He sat down next to you, letting you process his words. After some time you finally spoke.

“I dont know what to say,” You start “I believe you even though that means my company did this too me but.. I dont know. I want to forgive you. I want you, Cheol. I want you to be in my life again. but it took me so long to recover from this. I dont know if we’ll ever be what we were before,” He looks down at his feet in defeat “But we can try..” He looks up at you again, eyes brightening.

He finally smiles, “You dont understand how badly I missed you…” He hugs you tightly before looking into your eyes and then looking down at your lips “can I..” You nod slowly, waiting for his lips to touch yours.

He kisses your lips with hunger, holding on to you for fear you might run away “Missed you.. Misses your touch.. ‘m so sorry, my love” He pushes you flat on the couch you were sitting on, kissing you face and neck with desire. He missed this so much. “I love you, baby. Please let me make you feel good.. Love you..” You whine at his words, hips grinding up at his.

“l-love you too, Cheolie.. Please.. Need you so bad” Your hands move up and down his clothed back. “Please..missed you too” He kisses you quickly, breaking away to remove the both of your clothes.

“Just a gorgeous as I remember,” He mutters under his breath. You can feel his hard member on your stomach, moaning at the anticipation of having him after so long. “Need to be inside you so bad, baby”

“mhm please, cheolie..“ You pull him closer, begging him to do anything.

“shhh, ill take care of you, baby.” he coos at you, finally pushing in, “shit- so tight.. you feel so good baby” he brushes the hairs out of your face, kissing your forehead gently. “So good for me, my love”

“Please move- Please I need it. Cheolie- Needed this so bad” You sob as he finally starts to roll his hips into yours, groans falling from his mouth.

“God- y-you’re too good, baby. Am I making you feel good, hm?” He fucks into you faster, rougher, breathlessly calling out your name into your ear.

“yes yes makin’ me feel so good- gonna cum soon” You hips rut into his, determined to make both of you cum.

“b-baby” He pushes your hips back into the couch, “Be good- i’ll let you cum, promise…” He breathes out hot breath, eyes blown wide as he pounds into you; your heat sucking him in dangerously. “Cum for me please, need you to cum, baby.”

Your desperation for each other was unmatched and you were sure that the people walking past your dressing room can hear the obscene noises coming from it, but you could care less. The pleads for more came out if your mouth like a ritual and Seungcheol knew you were close. One of his hands grip your own, telling you to cum, and what else can you do when his cock twitches inside of you so deliciously. You cry out his name once more before cumming hard. Feeling you pulse around him, he fills you up with spurts of his hot cum in you. “Fuck, did you so good, my love. I love you so much” He breathes out, pecking your lips once again.

You look into his eyes, dazed, and welling with tears again. His happy demeanor changes ones again. “Hey. Hey, Y/n. What’s wrong? Did i do something?” He looks you up and down, checking for injuries. Making sure he didn’t fuck this up again.

“No- i just- i just missed you so much, Cheolie,” you cry out. “Love you so much..” His arms are around you before you can even say another word. He murmurs I love you’s into your ears, kissing the tears rolling down your face.

“I love you too, baby. let’s go home hm?”

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

a/n: these are the songs i used as reference for the solo album songs:

1. Can’t Love You Anymore - IU

2. Goodbye - OOHYO

3. Fallin’ - Yoon Hyun Sang

4. Glimpse of Us - Joji

this was so spur of the moment #loveit

[your-bestamericangirl]

Tolerate It.

Paige Bueckers x reader || next: n/a || masterlist

(there will be a pt 2!!)

notes: ANGST , ooc paige cuz obviously she isn't this mean, also not really a lot of paige sorry- sorta setting it up for the caitlin picking up the pieces in the second part.

now playing: tolerate it by taylor swift

(Y/n) would not do this to herself again. The warmth that once kissed her features had long since burned out. Her head hung low, eyes tracing the trail of melted wax pooling under the once-lit candle. Each droplet seemed to echo the tears she dared not shed.

How long had it been? The streetlights pouring in through the windows had been the only thing capable of illuminating the empty chair. Unfortunately, that allowed (Y/n) to continue to remind herself that someone was supposed to be sitting across from her.

Her absence was equally overwhelming as her presence. She sat atop a pedestal of achivements. Before, they had been equals, minds intertwined through a delicate thread of gold. Eventually, she rose too far for (Y/n) to reach.

As (Y/n) stared into the flickering flame, the room felt suffocatingly silent. The oppressive stillness was broken only by the faint hum of the streetlights outside, casting long shadows that danced across the walls. The empty chair stood as a silent reminder of her absence, its weight pressing down on (Y/n) 's heart like a leaden anchor.

It seemed as though now, Paige only tolerated her love.

The click of an unlocked door echoed throughout their shared apartment, bouncing off the walls.

Steps sounded, their treads light, careful not to disturb the sleeping night.

(Y/n) kept her gaze locked on the wall ahead, lest her tears fell as she found Paige’s blameless eyes.

“You didn’t have to wait for me, baby.”

“You shouldn’t have kept me waiting.”

Paige’s face carried no regret. Her eyes shut, breath from the depths of her lungs was let out in a sigh. 

From her seat, (Y/n) craned her neck upwards to meet Paige’s unbothered gaze. She searched within Paige’s eyes, there laid not even a hint of remorse.

“I don’t know what you want me to say, (Y/n) .” 

She felt the weight of Paige's words like a physical blow, knocking the breath from her lungs. The ache in her chest deepened, a gnawing emptiness that threatened to consume her whole. She struggled to find her voice, to articulate the storm of emotions raging within her.

"You don't know?" (Y/n) 's voice rang with a mixture of hurt and indignation. "Of course you wouldn’t know how it feels to wait for someone."

Paige's expression remained impassive, unmoved by (Y/n) 's pain. It was a familiar sight, one that she had grown accustomed to over time. The realization only fuelled the bitterness welling up inside her. Wood gathered under her nails, scratched off as she gripped the table. Whether it be for stability or out of anger.

"I'm tired of waiting for scraps of affection, Paige," (Y/n) 's voice wavered, betraying the depth of her despair. "Why can’t you see me."

For a moment, there was silence, broken only by the steady rhythm of their breathing. In the dim light of the room, (Y/n) could see the weariness etched into Paige's features, a reflection of her own exhaustion. She always wondered how Paige could be so oblivious to her pleas for affection. 

Long ago, Paige had thrown her weight onto (Y/n) , overwhelming her senses all at once. Perhaps dulling out what their relationship really meant. When Paige suddenly stopped reciprocating anything, (Y/n) had been thrown off balance. Where had the longing gazes departed to? The warmth coursing through both their veins turned cold. Though it had been evident who was was capable of living that way.

"I know," Paige finally spoke, her voice soft but devoid of warmth. "And I'm sorry."

Eyes shut, (Y/n) scoffed. “So?” She questioned, surely that wasn’t all Paige had to say.

It was all she ever did. Early on, (Y/n) worshiped those little apologies. Welcoming them as they had been all she had wanted to hear from her lover. Soon enough, it had been clear that Paige was accustom to using empty words.

And so, (Y/n) found herself trapped in a cycle of longing and despair, unable to escape the crushing weight of her unrequited affection. 

“I said I was sorry. What more do you want?” At this point Paige stood, exasperated and defensive. Her eyes turned sower, expression twisted as she took in the state of (Y/n) before her. 

“Where did you go?” (Y/n) questioned, her voice down to a whisper.  As the candle burned low, casting eerie shadows that danced like ghosts in the darkness, (Y/n) knew she would not do this to herself again. But the ache in her heart, the echo of her lover's absence, remained as a haunting reminder of what she had lost.

“Why are you so sensitive? I just came back from Em’s, calm down.” The answer shot out, burrying it’s resentment into (Y/n) ’s gut and spreading throughout her blood.

“No, Paige,” At last, the table became stained with tears. Ever so slowly, (Y/n) ’s heart broke. “Did you ever love me?”

(Y/n) s heart sank as she waited for an answer that would never come. The silence stretched between them, heavy with unspoken words and shattered dreams. With a heavy heart, she rose from her seat, her gaze lingering on Paige's impassive form for a moment longer before turning away.

As she stepped out into the cool night air, (Y/n) felt a weight lift from her shoulders, a sense of liberation washing over her like a cleansing tide. The streets were deserted, bathed in the soft glow of the streetlights overhead. 

The night air was cool against her skin. (Y/n) breathed it in deeply, letting go of the pain and disappointment that had held her captive for so long. 

She left behind the empty promises and broken dreams of her past. She walked with her head held high, her heart filled with hope for the possibilities that lay ahead. And as she disappeared into the night, leaving behind the echoes of a love that was never meant to be, she knew that she was finally free.

a/n: OKAY HOPE YALL LIKED IT (may or may not be based off of my own experiences-) sorry for not that much Paige, but send in more requestssss LOVE YALL MWAH

[mncxbe]

Hello if possible maybe Akutagawa, Chuuya and Dazai when reader drags them out to a lingerie store with them and gives them free reign of what they can pick out for reader

oh my I absolutely love this prompt. I hope you like it♡♡

Victoria's secret

𝑨𝒌��𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂, 𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊, 𝑪𝒉𝒖𝒚𝒂 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: fluff/ a little bit of dirty talk♡

𝑨𝒌𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂

let's start off with our favourite mafioso

you're on a date in town and suddenly spot a newly opened Victoria's Secret store and you just have to take advantage of the situation

as soon as you enter the shop Akutagawa blushes so much and although he tries to hide it you notice

please don't tease him about it too much he'll straight up leave

he's a big fan of black or white laced lingerie and slip dresses, anything elegant and cute; but also has a thing for body harnesses and leather accessories (the port mafia influences)

he ends up buying you a few items that he carefully picked and you both like

One day you're walking around town after Akutagawa finished work. It was late afternoon and the city was bathed in a shimmer of gold and orange hues. Just as you were about to leave the crowded boulevard you were on, a glowing sign caught your eye; it was a newly open Victoria's secrets store.

Without a warning you seized your boyfriend's wrist and dragged him towards the shop.

"We have to go in there Ryu. Come on" you said in a chipper voice.

At first Akutagawa was confused by your sudden actions and words, but then his gaze fell upon the magenta glass that made up the exterior walls of the shop and the 'newly opened' banner that hanged below the store's name; his body grew stiff.

"There's no way I'm going in there" he said in an annoyed voice, causing you to turn and face him.

"Aww come on Ryu they just opened and-"

"No. I'm not stepping foot in that place for nothing. Please, let's keep walking"

"But we'll only stay for a minute" you pressed as you clinged to his arm, leaning closer to whisper in his ear. "I'll let you choose something nice for me, ok? Whatever you want and I promise I'll wear it next time we-"

"Ok ok I got it" he interrupted, trying to conceal the blush that began to tint his face with the back of his hand. "Let's go then."

With that, Akutagawa walked towards the store with you following close behind. A sense of uneasiness creeped into your boyfriend's body as he entered the store; the place was packed with drawers upon drawers of lingerie, faceless mannequins wearing matching colourful sets and flimsy nightgowns and clothing racks bearing dresses.

You spared Akutagawa a quick glance. His face was contorted in a doubtful expression, nose scrunched in disgust.

"I really can't understand how anyone could enjoy... this?" he said, motioning towards the display. "Anyway, let's see what we can find for you."

There weren't many people in the store so you could easily move around maze of shelves and boxes. Akutagawa's demeanour slowly relaxed as he kept digging through the drawers packed with lingerie, carefully considering each piece; at some point you left to look around the store yourself.

Around twenty minutes later he returned to you carrying a baby pink bag.

"All done love. We can leave now." he said, handing you the bag.

You eagerly reached for it, attempting to remove the fluffy material that had been placed on top of the items but he brushed your hand away.

"Wait until we get home, ok? Be patient"

You let out a displeased groan but ultimately closed the handbag. Fingers gently intertwined, you made your way back to your apartment.

Once inside you seated yourself on your cushioned sofa and eagerly opened the bag. It contained two sets of laced lingerie: one of them was fully back and the other one was white, adorned with black and silvery rose patterns. The fabric was soft and lightweight, like a leaf.

"Wow Ryu they're beautiful. I love them so much" you beamed, pulling him into a tight hug. "You're amazing love"

"Wait, there's more." he said in a suggestive voice, reaching inside the pocket of his coat to procure a package. "I just couldn't help myself when I saw it."

You raised an eyebrow at him as you began to unwrap the light pink paper; it opened like a cherry blosson, revealing a strappy bodysuit. The thing lines of leather were bound together by shining circles of metal A blush rose to your cheeks.

"I- uh. It's really pretty love. I didn't know you liked this stuff tho"

"I love it, darling" he said in a honeyed voice, a hint of desire flashing in his eyes. "Now go ahead and try it on dear. The night is still young."

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊

he's such a tease

he doesn't have that much money so he'll only buy you one or two sets but they're picked so carefully

but if he has more cash one week he'll surely get one of those silly animal print panties from the sales section

I feel like Dazai likes beige lingerie the most or those white see-through pieces with butterfly patters♡

trying on the clothes once you get back home is a must; like you're putting on a fashion show for him

It was a wonderful Sunday afternoon and your lovely boyfriend decided to skip work again to join you for a cup of coffee in town.

"Ah my bella if you keep tempting me with all these hangouts I'll surely lose my job" he said in an overly dramatic voice.

"You know the Agency needs you, so don't stress it. Plus, I hardly ever get a free day from work myself. Let's just enjoy it ok?"

Your remark caused a smirk to rise to Dazai's lips. The two of you quietly sipped your coffee before resolving to take a walk around town. As you strolled around the busy city, you suddenly spotted a lingerie store and an idea popped into your mind.

"Say, Osamu" you began in a tender voice "Don't you think you deserve a reward for skipping work today?"

"Oh really? And what exactly do you have in mind, bella?" he replied with a miscievous smile on his face.

You pointed at the lingerie store. "I'll let you buy anything you want me to wear."

Your sweet boyfriend could barely contain his excitement as he took your hand in his and began walking towards the store. "Well then let's hurry bella. I only have an hour until I have to get back to the office."

You've been in a Victoria's Secret shop before, but none of them was as large as this one; hundreads of drawers and clothing racks decorated the sides of the store while the middle was occupied by beautifully dressed mannequins and islands of boxes. People flocked around the cash register, carrying handfuls of garments.

Dazai whisteled in surprise. "There's surely many things I can choose from. If you want to you can go look around too."

You gave him a reassuring nod and with that, your boyfriend left. Around half an hour later, he returned with a couple of garments.

"I found these but I wanted to check with you if you like them." he said in a sweet voice. However, the glimmer of amusement in his eyes didn't go unnoticed. He held a see-through white bra adorned with drawings of vines and pink and red flowers in front of you.

"Look how pretty this is. You know what a perfect view I'll have when I use your tits to-"

"Osamu!" you exclaimed, covering his mouth with your hand. "You can't say that. We're in public"

Your boyfriend only chuckled at your reaction, gently removing your hand from his face.

"Ok ok I'll stop. But you got the point. You'd look amazing in this."

Then he cast aside the set and showed you a beautiful cream coloured silky dress; its cleavage was laced and it had two thin straps for your shoulders.

"I remembered you were looking for one of these a few weeks ago. Do you like it?"

A wide smile rose to your lips as you ardently nodded. It was indeed a lovely dress, which reminded you of a pearl; the material was soft and elegant and the colour perfectly complemented your chestnut hair and brown eyes.

"I love it honey. Let's get them"

"As you wish my darling" he beamed, walking towards the register.

That evening Dazai made sure you put on a show; he made you wear the things he got you, matching them with accessories you already had.

"Wow you look ravishing, dear. Do a twirl"

You obeyed and quickly spun around once, earning a smile from your partner.

"Now I also got you something else. I slipped it to the cashier when you weren't looking. Promise not to laugh, ok?"

"Um.. ok?" you said with a sceptical look on your face.

Dazai took out a pair of tiger print panties with 'Bite me!' on the front. You burst into laughter upon seeing them.

"I just couldn't resist they look so silly. Plus, they were on sale."

"But Osamu how will they even fit me? They look like they're from the kid's section" you said between ragged breathes, wiping a tear of joy from the corner of your eye.

"Well, there's only one way to find out if they'll fit. Go change bella♡"

𝑪𝒉𝒖𝒚𝒂

this man when I tell you~ he's the definition of lemme spoil you babygirl

he's more than happy to oblige you

walks so proudly in the store and immediately starts picking up things from you

unlike Dazai, he doesn't care about the price; if he likes a £200 matching he'll get it so he probably ends up buying half of the store

while he picks up the pieces the likes he keeps telling you how beautiful you'll look in them and how he cannot wait to get home to try out some of the things he got you

Chuya likes black or burgundy lingerie the best, but also anything with straps

"Chuu" you cried out, pulling at your boyfriend's arm "Come on the shop's going to close soon."

You somehow managed to convince Chuya to come with you to the newly opened Victoria's Secret in town by promising him that he can pick anything he wants for you.

"I'm coming darling." he said as he languidly opened the glass doors of the store. "After you, my lady"

You entered the shop, barely able to conceal your excitement. It was packed with people and garments of all colours: elegant lingerie and nightgowns, shoeboxes and bottles of perfume.

"Woah! I didn't expect it to be this big" you exclaimed "What do you think, Chuu?"

Your boyfriend's gaze lazily wandered around the room; he seemed utterly unimpressed by the store.

"I mean, it wouldn't be my first choice for a shop. I prefer things from Bluebella or Bordelle, maybe even Fleur Du Mal. But I'm sure I'll be able to find something for you in here too" he said with a wink as he began walking around the store.

Naturally, you didn't know any of the brands he mentioned but you assumed they were luxurious; Chuya had an eye for expensive things.

Your boyfriend seem carefree as he carefully explored each mannequin and drawer.

"Wow look at this" he said as he held a pair of wine red see-through panties before you "You'd look absolutely ravishing in these."

His hand then travelled along the expanse of a mannequin's chest. It was wearing a matching set of black lace lingerie; the panties were connected to the bra by two leather straps, bound in the middle by a heart shaped metal. One of his fingers hooked under the iron heart, gently pulling at it.

"Oh darling what I'd do to you in this. Imagine how pretty you'd look wearing this and one of my leather chokers. My, my doll we must get this" he said in a teasing voice, causing your cheeks to turn a light shade of pink.

You only had about half an hour until the store closed for the day, but that didn't stop Chuya from buying you six sets of lingerie, two red bodysuits, a silky slip dress and two bottles of perfume. You stepped out of the shop, yoir boyfriend carrying six little pink bags.

"Darling we shouldn't have gotten all those things. They were way too expensive and-"

"Shh dear let me spoil you today, alright? You deserve it." he cooed at you, leaning in to place a feathery kiss on your lips. "Besides, you can make up for it tonight."

"And what exactly do you mean my that?" you said back, copying his alluring tone.

A smirk rose to his lips as his free arm snaked around your lower back, pulling you closer to him His breath was hot against the shell of your ear as he spoke, causing a shiver to run down your spine:

"I think you know exactly what I mean, dear. It involves you wearing that beautiful bodysuit I got you"

[chososdiscordkitten]

✫Escort!Toji✫ pt 2

MDNI

Pt 1 here

Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x afab!reader Content: NSFW, direct continuation of pt 1, no use of y/n, comparisons, toji ruins ur shirt:( toji jacks off with ur panties, oral (f receiving) Implied oral (m), protected sex, 2 pics to help picture the positions bcs i suck at writing, toji cums in his pants AGAIN, reader cleans tojis fingers after yk, starts slow but eventually is rough, sweetheart used once, he is a confirmed panties stealer, no aftercare sowy

taglist:  @lostmymarblesstuff @vicravluv @mutsu422

⋆ ˚｡ ⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡ ⋆

Your eyes blinked open, feeling the dim light of the side table flood your vision making you go blind for a second. Suddenly very cold as you clutched onto the thin sheet on top of you. Your mind flashing back to what had happened before you fell asleep.

You sat up, looking at the clock on the side table, you had slept a whole 12 hours. It was 10 am Saturday, the next morning. You fell back into the pillows as you closed your eyes, remembering what happened last night. Remembering that you didn’t pay him, you shot up to check your wallet in fear that Toji had robbed you after fucking you to sleep.

Your inner thighs sting as you rummage through your coat. Opening your wallet and seeing it was full, counting the bills carefully. Your eyebrows furrowed, seeing it was all there. Thinking it was some kind of tactic to get you to keep coming back.

You exhaled, looking over at the room as you picked up the discarded clothing. ‘Shirt, skirt, socks, bra-’ you made a mental checklist. ‘Where are my panties?’ you looked everywhere. Under the bed, under the chair. The cracks of the mattress, the trash can. Nothing, thinking up a million reasons for why and how they disappeared.

Putting your clothes on as you look out the window from the doorway. Turning around and walking out. Now came the walk of shame, or so you thought. Walking down the hallway toward the elevator. Back to the lobby, avoiding eye contact with the same person behind the desk from last night.

“Um- Excuse me!” the woman said she reached out an arm towards you. “The room wasn't paid for- the gentleman said you would take care of it.” She said, looking you over as your face dropped.

“Of course-” you said, face warm from embarrassment. Walking over to the desk and looking down to your shoes as you heard her tell you the price. Quickly pulling out your wallet and giving her the cash, almost snatching your receipt as you hurried out of the hotel. In fear one of your co-workers would see you here. 

Though your coworker had a point, you did sleep like a rock. But the embarrassment after finally letting go of stress and the pent up frustration in your womb was a lot to take on at once.

Arriving at your apartment and plopping onto your bed,‘I'll never do that again’ you vowed as you looked over at the crumbled piece of paper with his phone number in it. Shoving your face in your pillows as you fought off the flashing images of him.

Face burning up as you remembered what he did, how filthy he was, and how much you liked it. A chill ran down your spine as you felt your leg twitch. Swiftly getting up to take a cold shower. The next days were the same, taking a cold shower in the morning and one when you'd come home from work.

Anytime a coworker had upset you, you felt a certain anger that you hoped would be gone if you fucked Toji again. A blind anger that made your finger scroll through your phone, writing out a text and almost pressing send. Inhaling sharply before deleting it. Nodding your head no as you remembered your vow to not to do that again.

In a more realistic way, the anger probably wouldn’t go away if you fucked him, but it would help you let out some stress, let some of the poison that pooled inside of you. 

Toji was worse. Finding himself being more irritable than he usually was. Telling his clients to ‘shut the fuck up’ whenever they tried to fake their moans, irritation coated his words knowing they could never even come close to sounding the way you did.

Knowing that with his clients, they did it just to keep him hard. But you? Your whines and pleads were practically forced out of you, eye twitching whenever he remembered how you came on his fingers.

He tried to not think of you, desperately trying to forget the fucked out expression that adorned your pretty face. Not even feeling the slightest bit of remorse when he’d snatch the cash out of their hands.

What pissed him off wasn’t that they sucked at fucking, or that they had no passion in their eyes. It was the fact that they'd ask him about his day, or ask him why he's doing this. Always expecting him to fall for them, almost making him tell them to get the fuck out whenever they’d say- “You’re going to charge me?” thinking that they were so good at having sex that he didn't need to be paid.

And there was nothing Toji hated more than when they’d ask him to fuck them raw, almost shuddering in disgust at the thought. Four days had passed since he fucked you. Still, he’d close his eyes and picture you while he drilled into the many clients. Your cunt, your tits, your teary eyes, and the way you fucking smelled.

The way you didn't hesitate to let him spit in your mouth. Remembering it made him throw his head back, biting his lip as he held back his groans. But it wasn't enough, they weren't enough.

In Toji’s alone time he would think how many women it would take to satiate this deep need for what you gave him a taste of. ‘10? No- 30?’ he’d think, he could count to 100 and he would still say no.

What Toji appreciated most about the interaction he had with you, was that you didn't try to get to know him first. You didn't ask if he could stay with you after, or ask him why he was prostituting himself.

Toji liked that you came to fuck, not to talk about feelings. He'd find himself stroking himself with your panties in his hand, eyes shut tight and hand practically strangling his cock. Soft groans leaving his mouth.

Teeth clenched tightly, holding his shirt up. He knew he should’ve woken you up to fuck you again. 

His hand was never enough, he felt pent up even if he came triple the amount of times that week. Toji had thought of how to get you to ask him to hook up again, knowing that if you took any longer to text him he wouldn't have any control with how rough he'd be with you.

That forgotten feeling of guilt pooling in his stomach again, thinking that's probably why you haven't contacted him. He thought ‘fuck it-’ feeling his cock harden at the thought of seeing you again. His thumbs hovering over the keys as he thought of what to type.

‘Tomorrow. 6pm. Same room.’ quick thumbs pressing the keyboard, feeling his cock twitch as he looked at the name he saved you under. Smirk on his face as he watched the message go from ‘delivered’ to ‘read’ in seconds.

You had just gotten out of your morning shower, wrapped in a towel as your cheeks turned warm at the text. Your mouth cracked open as you saw he texted first. Thinking it was odd but not unheard of?

‘Maybe he just wants his money’ you'd think, fingers hesitating to reply. ‘Okay :)’ you replied, hoping he didn't think you were purposefully stiffing him, in hopes that the smiley face would make the situation easier.

Hoping he wouldn't be pissed that you didn't pay him. That night you kept thinking about it. ‘Why wait four days to ask me for his money? Was he doing accounts and noticed a lack of it? Will my kidney be stolen if I show up?’ millions of thoughts raced through your head as you tried to sleep.

Mainly of if he was plotting some kind of great violence against you. But whispers of ‘I hope we fuck.’ in your mind as you drifted to sleep.

The next day was spent hoping the clock would go by as slow as it did the last time you saw him, but it moved at a pace that made you feel a frog in your throat and made your knee bounce up and down nervously.

What made you even more afraid to go is how you heard one of your coworkers complain about how Toji canceled her appointment. Shuddering at the thought that he was losing money just to get you to pay him.

Remembering his figure and how strong he was, hoping he would have mercy on you if he decided to teach you a lesson.

Not even bothering to go home since the time was so close together, getting out of work at 5:30 and arriving at the hotel at 5:56 pm. Your feet numb as you walked past the front desk, making eye contact with the same receptionist looking at you.

Your work heels clacking against the tile floor. Stepping into the elevator as you fixed your shirt in the reflection. Adjusting the slacks you had decided to wear that morning. Sighing as you saw the elevator stop at the same floor.

Walking passed the same red doors as last time, only this time they were quiet. Probably because it was still light out, but it didn’t make your nerves ease. Making your thoughts race even faster as you walked passed the red doors.

Your legs slightly wobble as you reach room 203. Looking down at the carpet as you hesitate to ball your hand to a fist, knocking once and pulling back to knock again. But you heard the door knob jiggle after the first one.

This time no heavy footsteps or seconds before he opened the door. Letting your hand fall as you laid eyes on him. Tall figure looming over you. Toji’s jaw clenched tightly as he looked you up and down. You stared at him in silence.

His hand reached for your wrist as he yanked you inside. Slamming the door shut as he pressed you against the closed door. Tilting his head as he looked at you, Toji couldn't keep up this facade anymore. The pent up need inside his gut made him act before he could think.

Eyes roaming your shocked face as he leaned in closer, you mouthed a ‘what are you-’ as he pressed his lips to yours. Hands landing on your arms, holding you still as you felt him slide his tongue into your mouth. Feeling your confusion as you opened yours in return. Cock twitching as his half lidded eyes looked to yours that blinked shut. Seeing your face of worry fall to desire.

Your hands went to his forearm and shoulder to hold him back as his tongue reached deep into your mouth. Spit falling from the corner of your lips as you felt Toji’s hands undo the button of your slacks.

Sliding the zipper down as you felt his hand slide up your back. Noting how this felt much different than last time. This time he seemed more needy. Hands going to the buttons of your shirt as his thick fingers fiddled with the tiny buttons.

Groaning as he felt your hand slide down his torso, towards the tent in his pants. Lips sucking on yours as he struggled with the buttons of your shirt. His groans of frustration grew louder as his fingers slipped through the openings between the buttons.

Mentally cursing them as his fingers pulled harshly at your shirt. The sound of the flying buttons landing on the floor made you inhale loudly. Pulling your lips from his as he roamed down to your jaw, sucking on your skin leaving wet spots on it as he slid down to your breasts.

Toji’s hands wrapping around you as his fingers unhook the clasps of your bra. Simple and black, seeing as you didn’t expect this to happen. His hands sliding back up to your shoulders to push off your shirt, pulling the straps of your bra off of you. His eye twitched in anticipation when he saw your breasts.

Leaning into your neck, licking your skin while he made his way down to your bare nipple. Opening his mouth as his eyes rolled to the back of his head. Groaning at the feeling of your nipple in his mouth. Sucking harshly like he wanted something to pour out of it.

One of his hands going to tug at your pants, whines leaving your lips, feeling his other hand knead at your breast. Toji’s tongue swirling around your nipple as he felt your hands shove your pants down to your ankles and kick them off along with your heels.

His ears taking in every single one of your moans, making sure that this time he would have to take his sweet time with you. That he fucked you slow, like you had asked him last time.

The hand that tugged on your pants now rubbing your clothed cunt, his middle and ring finger sliding up and down your wet panties. Whining at the feeling as his eyes looked up to you, nipple still in mouth, letting out a low moan.

The vibrations against your nipple make you cry out, his fingers rough against your panties as his hand grips roughly at your breast, his stern face was full of pleasure. Your eyes scanning his features, seeing that he was getting off on making you feel good.

Letting your breast pop out of his mouth, his lips leaving a trail of spit down your sternum as he made his way to your throbbing cunt. This time you noticed he didn't ask how you wanted him, not telling you he charged per service.

There were no words spoken, no hesitation in what he was doing. Like he had thought about this long before you got here. Thinking if he was planning on doing this when he texted you- your went brain fuzzy, feeling his rough fingers hook to the sides of your panties. But to Toji? Your dripping cunt told him all he needed to know, seeing the mess you made in your panties just from his heavy petting.

Looking up at you as he slipped your cotton panties down, seeing your face churn with anticipation as he placed wet kisses down your torso. Smiling to himself as he felt the goosebumps form on your thighs before he slid his middle finger down your sopping cunt.

Feeling your slick coat his finger, your hips writhing at his touch. Toji’s cock aching in his pants as he slipped his finger through your entrance, pinching his eyebrows together as he held back a choked groan.

Feeling your cunt practically pull him deeper into you. Gaining a whine from you as you felt how slow he was going. Still looking up at you, his head on your hand, the other holding the wall for support.

Using all the strength you could muster to not shove your cunt to his face for relief. Sliding his finger back out, feeling your hips buck up as your clit begged for attention. Taking the hint, he leaned closer. His breath against your pulsating clit made you whine.

Lip tucked in between your teeth as his lips brushed against your clit. Wrapping his lips around the bundle of nerves, closing your eyes and lightly panting at the feeling. Letting out a stifled moan as your head flew back to the door. Trying to catch your breath as Toji slipped out his middle finger and pressed it to his ring finger.

Low groans leaving his lips and vibrating onto your clit, feeling his wet digit against the other. Slipping his two fingers back into you, moans leaving your mouth as his eyes rolled to the back of his head.

Your fingers tugging at his scalp, feeling his tongue swirl against you. Toji’s thick fingers scissoring inside of you made your back arch against the closed door. Eyes closed tight as you squirmed, feeling his lips suck on your clit, his fingers pressing against the spot that made your toes curl.

Loud moans leaving your lips, a shiver ran down your spine as his tongue sped up, cracking your eyes open and looking down at him, feasting on your cunt like he hadn't eaten in decades.

The hand on the wall moving to hold the locked doorknob, feeling yourself come undone in his mouth. Thrusting your cunt into his mouth, “I’m coming-” You muttered, your grip on his head made Toji groan against your cunt, feeling himself almost cum untouched in his pants. 

His lips not leaving your cunt as you let out quick gasps, moans littered with small ‘wait-’ as he sucked relentlessly. The fingers inside of you curling upwards, making you lift yourself onto the tips of your toes.

Gasping sharply as your mouth hung open, feeling Toji lift himself so his mouth would stay on your cunt. His hand goes to the back of your thigh, pulling you back down. Both your hands on the side of his face, trying to push his mouth away from your now overstimulated clit.

“Fffuck!” you moaned, looking down at him as he took another orgasm from you. Your hips buckled into his mouth as he slowed his pace. Small moans leaving your lips as he slowly slid his fingers out of you, shuddering when his lips finally pulled away from your cunt. Looking down to see him also looking down to his gray sweats.

A wet spot right where his cock would be. Heavy pants leaving your lips as you finally regained your thoughts. ‘Did he cum just by eating me out?’ your mind was reeling at the sight before you.

Hearing a shivering sigh leave his lips as he came down from what you had just forced out of him. He looked up at you, softer eyebrows than before at the realization that you had made him cum untouched. Not once in his life had that ever happened, his lips parted as you caressed his cheek.

‘Is this embarrassment?’ Toji thought, knowing that seeing you try to make him feel better only made his cock throb in his pants, and start to rise again. This time the want to fuck you wasn’t in his mind. It was something deeper, something primitive glimmered in his eyes as he arose.

Standing before you with a stern look on his face, as though you had done something wrong. Not even bothering to tilt his head down to look at you, his eyes were the only thing that were angled. The hand was just inside of you, raising and stopping mere centimeters in front of your lips.

Toji’s lips mouthing ‘Open’ as your hands clutched onto his forearm. Eyes not leaving his as you opened your mouth and pulled his hand closer to you. Placing an open mouth kiss to the tips of his fingers.

Tasting yourself and letting out a low hum. His jaw clenching when he saw you kiss down his fingers, licking up the side of them before wrapping your lips around him.

Eye twitching while thinking- ‘if this is how you suck my fingers-’ picturing your pretty lips around his fat cock, the image of his cum garnishing your face made him crack his lips open. Feeling your hand roam up to hold onto his palm, eyeing how your fingers could barely cover his palm. Just his palm.

Your lips dragging up Toji’s thick fingers, your eyes lit up with pride at how well you cleaned them. Slipping them from your mouth and placing a small kiss to the tips of them. Smile creeping onto Toji’s lips at seeing how good you were.

Almost picturing you wrapped in just a bow, a present just for him. Thinking about how he wanted to fuck you, which one of his fantasies he wanted to fulfill, looking into your eyes. Seeing you lean into his face, pressing a kiss to his lips before whispering, “How do you wanna fuck me.” Smile on your lips as you saw his eyes shine.

Smile now evident on his lips as he pressed a firm kiss to your lips, his hands pulling you from the doorway and guiding you onto the bed. His hands gently pushing you to lay on your back. Propping yourself onto your elbows and seeing him between your knees. Pulling his cream colored sweater off and tossing it.

Your lip tucked between your teeth as you scanned his physique. Toji’s fingers fishing in the deep pocket of his sweats, a flash of pain on his face when he felt the wrapper touch his hand. Holding it in his teeth before tugging his pants down, seeing his cock spring to freedom.

Smile on your face as you watched him slide the second skin on. Kneeling onto the bed, before his hands slid up your thighs. Playful smile on your lips as he pressed a kiss to them. Slowly moving you both higher up the bed, resting your head onto the pillows as his hand angled your bottom to turn over. Only he didn't break the kiss, forcing only your bottom half to twist.

Leaving you on your side, your hands holding your torso up to face him. Feeling his lips pull away from you. Hand on your ass to keep you still as you looked up at him. Feeling his cock graze your slick entrance, a small hiss leaves Toji’s lips as he slowly pushed his hips towards you. His fat tip making you whine, feeling your cheeks turn warm and wanting to turn over and put your face into the pillows.

The position he had you in made this feel too exposed. Too intimate. Toji’s hand going to hold you by your jaw, seeing you start to turn over. Low groan leaving his mouth before he spoke, “Mm, wanna see your face while I fuck you.” he murmured, making your cunt squeeze around him in response, smile on his lips as he drove himself further into you.

His hand goes from your jaw to your cheeks, holding your face tightly before pressing a wet kiss onto your pursed lips. A line of spit connecting him to you before he tightened his hand, making your lips part. Gathering spit onto his tongue and spitting it into the gap your lips made.

Everything inside of Toji tells him to thrust his cock into you, hard. But he couldn't risk it, he wasn't going to risk not having you come back to him. 

Toji’s slow hips pressing against your ass, his hand on your thigh pushing it further up so he could get a better view of his cock disappearing inside of you. The hand on your face going to your tit as he pressed you to turn your upper body, more than you were already doing.

Making you let out a choked whine, feeling him start to contort your body further and further. Your hand is going to push his hip in hopes he’d look up to see your face of pain. The trance your cunt put him in snapped when he heard your moans turn to whines, looking up to see fat tears fall from your eyelashes.

Struggling to keep the slow rhythm as he leaned down to kiss you, easing his grip on your skin. His lips soothing the ache before you pulled away, “Please- Harder.” whiny tone in your words as you looked into his eyes. Toji almost came when he heard you, sliding his cock out of you slowly. Dragging the ridge of his tip past your sweet spot.

Looking into your pained face before harshly thrusting into you. Hearing a small yelp fall from your lips, quickening his pace and seeing a smile form onto your lips at his thrusts. The sound of your moans was music to his ears. The same desperate moans you had gifted him the first time he fucked you, now leaving your lips again while he drilled into you.

The sound of his heavy balls slapping against your ass made you smile even harder if that were possible. Feeling your hand clutch onto his that rested onto your thigh only gave him more motivation, to keep fucking into you the way you begged him to. Feeling his knees tire at his firm thrusts, he laid onto his side close behind you. His hand angling your head to look into his eyes.

His hips thrusting into you hard, your nose brushing against his as you felt his hand go down to your closed thighs, urging you to open them with his hand. Hooking your leg to the back of his knee. Not even bothering to separate his digits before pressing his fingers to your hardened clit, moving his hand swiftly back and forth.

His eyebrows pinched upwards as he felt your cunt squeeze his cock. Opening his mouth with a low groan when he saw your eyes close. Your hand holding the back of his head, breathing the same air as him while you came undone onto his cock.

Opening your eyes and looking at him, before pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. Eyes half lidded as he pressed his lips to yours firmer. Feeling his hips stutter against your ass, throaty groans leaving his lips as he came inside the condom. Slowing his pace against you, exhaling as he rested his forehead to your temple. 

Raising your hand to caress his neck as his thrusts slowed, hearing Toji gulp into your ear. Trailing the hand that was on your clit to rest onto your side. Biting his lip to silence his moan when he felt your cunt suck him back in when he tried to pull out.

Unhooking your leg from his thigh and letting it fall atop the other, your face now looking away from him. Struggling to keep your eyes open, feeling his warmth behind you only made you want to fall asleep even more. Feeling his lips press a gentle kiss onto your shoulder, dread in his eyes when he slowly pulled out of you. Rolling over to lay on his back, hand resting on his torso. Turning his head slightly as he looked at your exposed nape.

The want to stay here, in bed with you, was strong. But not strong enough for him to actually stay. Furrowing his eyebrows when he felt his hand lift off his sternum to reach for you. Pulling it back before sitting up, flinging his legs off the edge of the bed. Rolling off the filled condom, noticing he came alot more than he usually did.

Tying a small knot at the top and tossing it to the trashcan next to the bed. Looking over to see your back, seeing it fall and rise as though you were asleep. Closing his eyes before standing, picking up his soiled sweats before he heard you turn over. “Before you go-” you slurred, sitting up and looking over at him.

Toji knew that this was too good to be true, here you go asking him questions- “Could you pass me my wallet?” You slouched over yourself, looking at his face.

Seeing his hands drop his sweats and go to where you kicked off your slacks. Rummaging through the pockets and pulling out a small bag, walking back to the bed and sitting in front of you. Placing it on your hand, “S’been eating away at me-” you murmured, unzipping the small bag and pulling out a money clip.

Seeing you pull the folded money from it and look at him, “How much do I owe you?” You asked, genuine tone in your voice. Seeing your face relaxed and coated with a sheen of afterglow. Plump lips and not caring if you were still naked atop the bed.

Smirk on his lips seeing you look at him seriously. “Nah, you don't owe me anything.” He replied, seeing you furrow your eyebrows.

“What? No- I took up your time. I have to pay you something.” You rebutted, turning your head slightly to show your confusion.

“Hmm- I’ll settle on lettin’ you pay for the room.” He replied, standing up and walking over to his sweats again, grimacing when he saw his mess. You looked up at the ceiling as you thought about it. ‘Doesn't he make them pay for the room and his services?’ you recalled, hand full of cash while you watched him put on his pants. Tiredness making you blink slowly as you process his words, “So I don't have to pay for your time?” You asked, once more before he left.

“You always ask this many questions?” He snapped at you, holding his coat in his hand as he looked over at you. Lips pursed in defeat, not saying anything else. Toji, feeling ‘bad’, walked to the chair at the corner of the room, grabbing the thin sheet that was always there. Unfolding it somewhat and walking over to you, placing it over your legs.

Seeing you look up at him, your pupils the size of saucers. Leaning in close to your face, smile on his face- “What's your name again?” he asked, hunched over with his nose centimeters from yours, furrowing your eyebrows at his question. Saying your own name in a confused tone, almost a question.

He repeated your name, calling out to you. Placing his hand to the side of your face, “Sweetheart?” he asked again, at this point just teasing you, “You call me anytime you need. Hm?” He mumbled, lowering his face closer to yours. You slowly nodded your head.

Closing your eyes as he pressed a wet kiss onto your lips. Pulling away and looking into your eyes. “I'll see you on Friday.” he hummed, dropping his hand from your face and turning away from you.

Hearing you mumble a small ‘mmkay’ before walking to the doorway, hearing you shuffle into the bed. Looking back to see you laying on your stomach, the money in your hand now carelessly splayed on the empty space next to you.

Hearing you start to breathe heavier, walking back and carefully picking up the cash, feeling the bundle form in his hand. The same thought from last time popping into his head, shrugging it off and stuffing it back into your small wallet.

Gently placing it onto the side table next to you before walking to the doorway again, purposefully leaving his cream sweater, knowing you wouldn't have anything to wear when you'd leave. Putting on his coat and zipping it up to hide the fact he didn't have a shirt.

Seeing your clothes in front of the door, seeing how desperate he was earlier. Not even bothering with the buttons of your shirt. Malicious smile on his lips when he saw your black panties on the floor.

Picking them up and stuffing them into his pocket before leaving. Whilst walking out, pulling his phone out, swiping away all the useless messages and missed calls. Going to your contact and changing your name on his phone, now that he actually knew what to call you.

Typing ‘203’ at the end of it. Before walking onto the sidewalk, the setting sun reminded him that these were his peak hours of work. One word filled his head when he remembered he actually had to work; Dread.

-

merry christmas eve!!!!!! for my fellow hispanics, this is christmas day for us. so excited to get all dressed up and hang out in the living room till 12 am to open presents. i will 100% write more for choso later, wish i could now, but i need to sleep. 

[gh0stswh0re]

"relax your throat, darling"

warnings: f! reader, blowjobs + deepthroating, mutual masturbation, domestic fluff, inexperienced reader, established relationship, mentions of the reader being a virgin prior to the relationship, soft dom simon, praise

a/n: i spent an embarrassingly long time writing this and it's still barely a meh. it can be taken as a pt3 to the ghost x virgin (!) reader fic, although it's not implied anywhere + it lacks any proper storyline. this is more of a dribble than anything else.

...

nearly twenty minutes have passed since he picked you up in the kitchen, threw you over his shoulder, and carried you over to the couch – all of your protesting, giggling and playful hitting were to no avail.

it didn't really bother you, the feeling of domesticity; despite how quickly it settled into your lives – living together for barely three weeks and the tiny four-room apartment already started to feel like home.

the early morning cuddles which soon turned into ruthless competitions of who stays under the blankets for the longest before developing the first clinical signs of hyperthermia.

the dim flames of the cheap candles playfully dancing as their sweet aroma of apple-cinnamon spreads throughout the entire apartment complex – it'd be the very definition of tacky if it wasn't for simon trying so hard – even preparing dinner, despite cooking being one of the activities he hasn't done in years, and burning his hand twice in the process.

showering together – because it saves water, of course.

the late-night chatters which followed; strangely enough, simon never makes any other environmentalist comments – what a bastard.

all the small pieces puzzled together into the safe and comfortable living space you two shared, and while he would never say it out loud – simon was utterly thankful for it. and for moments like these – when he had you pinned down on the couch, one hand pressed against your tummy as the other held your hips in place with his nasty mouth pressed flat against your cunt – he was thanking god. or whatever external divine force intervened with his dull life - where the wish to suffer was just a passive request of his subconscious mind – and brought you straight into his embrace. it all felt like a simple promise - a promise of something greater that life has to offer.

this was no rare occurrence – grabbing handfuls of his clothes, silently urging him to take them off, to allow your curious fingers to explore every inch of his body, ... all while he slowly leans back, as the gaze of his drowsy eyes pierces right through you – like a predator stalking his prey - watching your every movement, and studying each individual facial expression – he could sink his teeth into you and devour you whole at any given moment, but he choses not to. truth be told, he finds his own perverted pleasure in it – his body merely anything but a physical tool for you to experiment on - teasing him in all ways possible just to see which movement provokes which reaction in him – who would have guessed such a pure virgin would turn into such a filthy slut.

although, there was a specific thing you've been begging him to try out with you – deepthroating. it sounded fun and looked fairly easy too – seeming like a good time all around.

today, you've built up enough courage to take some of the control away from him – dropping down onto your knees, a hand stilled on each one of his thighs as your lips sank down on his dick,"you didn't- shit, darling" the adam's apple bobbed in his throat as his head fell back and he swallowed hard. "darling, hey- you don't have to" one hand rested on top of your head. "but i want to" he should've known by now - dumb comments get even dumber responses.

you hated admitting he was right – especially about things you've begged him for – but it was a bit too much.

your chin quivering as your throat spasmed around his cock each time he hit the soft palate at the back of your mouth? too much.

your knees burning as if you've been kneeling on fragments of shattered glass for the past ten minutes? too much.

your jaw growing sore as spit dripples down your chin onto your chest? too much.

the stifled moans cutting through his vocal cords up his throat, as the blackness of his blown-out irises consume the color of his eyes? too-fucking-much.

he noticed – warm fingertips crept behind your neck, traveling up to your hairline "hey now-". blood rushed to your face – tingling your cheeks and painting them a shy tone of red as your lips separated from him with a loud, wet pop.

the calloused pads of his fingers rubbed against your lower jaw, carefully easing the stiffness away right before his palm wrapped around your throat – constricting the airway just enough to get a giggle out of you – dipping his head down, he used the opportunity to slip his tongue past your lips, swallowing the musky taste which spread throughout his mouth.

"just like that, lean back-" releasing his grip on your throat, his hand dropped down to your chest - pushing you away slightly. "and touch yourself" breath cycled inside your lungs – into your mouth, out of your nose – faster and faster with each weary moment.

"you know how i like it" lust streaked through you – from your veins into your bones, swallowing your being entirely. you do know exactly how he likes it – two fingers spreading the swollen folds of your cunt as the third one circles on your clit – and just how much he likes it.

so you did it – leaning backward on your heels, your right hand slipped past your tummy down to your sex – fuck, embarrassment burned hot inside you, but you couldn't deny just how aroused the entire thing made you – wetness was practically dripping out of your aching cunt.

your eyes bore into his before your stare dropped down from his lips to his collarbones - now glistening with a thin layer of sweat - to his stomach – muscles tensing up – down to his lap – he looked massive even as his own hand gripped around his length.

a part of you wanted more – to just hop onto his lap, to soak right through the fabric of his pants as you straddled against him.

the other part, the greater part of you, was frozen in place – paralyzed as you watched his hand move up and down, and up – his thumb teasing the leaky, sensitive tip – and down – his hips thrusting back against his palm.

bliss started to blur your brain's function and soon only a single thought remained in that pretty little head of yours – as he'd call it – to cum, to cum hard, and to cum right fucking now.

"faster, little dove – sing for me" pure carnality.

[elliespeach]

tear you apart part two | ellie williams

pairing ellie wiliams x fem reader synopsis ellie owns her own vinyl store and the day you wander in changes both of your lives forever. she quickly becomes infatuated with you, desperate for your love that she believes is meant to be. when things in your life begin to spiral, ellie is there to catch you, but you'd never suspect she was the reason you fell in the first place. wordcount: 3.8k warnings: stalking both cyber and in person, ellie is obsessive, manipulative, a gaslighter, a pervert lowkey, possessive and easily jealous, shes also so delusional like top tier delulu, shes based off joe goldberg so i mean put the pieces together. this is all from her perspective, most if not all of the inner monologue is ellie's thoughts about you, the italics is verbatim what she is thinking in that very moment if that makes sense. like joe, all of her actions are justified in her mind, and she doesn't see anything wrong with them. reader has a dysfunctional family. pls lmk if i am missing something! authors note: obsessive ellie nation RISE, bit of a twist in this one hope shes yummy!!! i have plans i can not share w you yet but i am so hype for the next part, yall should be too, anyway... happy reading

ellie sat in the corner of the bar waiting for you and your friends to show up. she had gotten here way too early, but it gave her time to canvas the bar. the bartenders were swamped with orders, the band playing on the small stage were taking a brief intermission– which ellie was grateful for because she didn’t see the appeal. it was quite crowded, working in ellie’s favor. while she waited for you, her fingers were dancing over her phone any second she got. 

firstly, she checked in on you. no instagram posts, stories, twitter updates, nothing to indicate you were going out. finally taking steps to protect yourself, good girl. then, she set her focus on finding this woman. she copy and pasted the phone number into google, loading…loading…loading… god this wifi fucking sucks…

when the circle of death vanished, nothing came of the phone number. the white pages had nothing to report on, the links were dead ends and ellie sat back in her chair with a huff, annoyed by the anonymity of this woman. her thoughts were interrupted when she saw the door to the bar open and your friends and you strolled in. she slouched over, bringing her head down but her eyes remained fixed on you. shauna was the last one to come through the door, but she quickly brought herself to the front of the group and sat you all down at a table nearly across the bar. 

ellie rolled her eyes, knowing she would have to move to get closer. so she did, keeping her head down as she went through the small crowd to the other end of the bar. from this seat, your back was turned from her and she felt a little disappointed that she couldn’t see your face, but decided it was for the better. shauna immediately started to order drinks, a round of shots and margaritas on top of it. whats the occasion? 

she had to focus real hard, but she was able to make out the conversation happening. 

“okay, okay, but seriously, i have something to tell you guys,” shauna started to speak as the waiter was placing their drinks down at the table. 

“god, you’re pregnant!” dina shouted to the table, and ellie could hear your laugh clear as day. the same laugh that was used for her just two weeks ago. god, how she missed you. 

shauna scoffed, “i’m not pregnant!” 

then you chimed in, your voice sounding sweet as ever over the rowdiness of the bar, “then whats so important? should i down this shot beforehand?” you playfully picked up the shot from the table, ready to take it and ellie’s eyes didn’t leave you for a second. 

shauna gracefully pushed your hand down, the shot back on the table and she spoke again, “i’m moving to california at the end of summer,”

the mood at the table became somber at her words, the girls looking around to each other. “sorry, what?” cat spoke up, sipping her margarita. 

ellie smirked, taking a sip of her own drink. not a bad idea, shauna. sure, she knew you would be upset and she was prepared to be there for you to get over losing your best friend, but in time you’ll realize that shauna was never your friend to begin with, she just liked having you around to boost her up. 

“like your whole family? or just you?” you asked her, and when shauna replied saying her whole family, your head snapped back and ellie could see that the shot glass you had in your hands was now empty. 

“why?” cat spoke again, glancing around the table to you and dina. 

“nevermind on why, i just want to have a good night! let’s get drunk–” she called over the waiter with a snap of her fingers, classy. her eyes met the waiters and then went to you, “another shot for my friend.” 

“give me two, please,” you spoke kindly to the waiter, and ellie’s grip on her own drink tightened. no way shauna leaving was upsetting you this much? how could it? ellie reminded herself that you had been friends with her for years, and even despite shauna being the way she is, she’s still your best friend. she wanted to give you a hug, tell you that it was for the better, but she knew she couldn’t. at least, not right now. 

the bartender took ellie out of her gaze, “another one?” he said, pointing to her empty glass. ellie shook her head no, if you were going to get plastered, she needed to make sure she was okay to watch over you. the band started to play again and it rang in ellie’s ears, making it difficult to hear the conversation at the table. 

the waiter brought the shots over, and everyone took them almost instantly. using their margaritas as a chaser, ellie’s eyes rolled again. the next thirty minutes was her just keeping an eye on you while you continued to get more and more drunk. you mumbled out that you had to “break the seal.” and you got up and stumbled over to the bathroom door. ellie could see everything from her seat, so instead of blowing her cover she stayed in the bar chair. 

ellie wasn’t a girls girl by any means, but she knew that once someone in the group walked away, the shit talking would commence. you had barely opened the door to the bathroom when shauna started. shauna, out of everyone. shes not your friend. “shes taking it kinda hard, isnt she?” 

“i’ve seen her more drunk that this.” dina laughed, keeping her voice low as if you could hear her. 

“oh yeah, the night she nearly got hit by that cab walking back to her apartment was the drunkest i’ve seen her,” cat laughed with dina, and shauna stayed neutral. 

“no but like, me leaving, shes taking it kind of hard, right?” 

dina looked to cat, then back to shauna, “i mean, yeah i guess. you’re her best friend.” 

is that a smile, shauna?

“i hate to be the one making her feel like that,” shauna pouted, now seeking the attention of her other friends. 

“no, no, it’s not your fault–” dina gushed. 

“yeah, it’s like, thats on her, you know? you can’t control how anyone feels except for you.” cat said softly, placing an arm on shauna’s shoulder. 

jesus christ, the therapy words. where did you people come from? 

before they could continue talking, you returned from the bathroom, bumping into the table lightly before sitting down. “another shot?” you asked them, seeing their drinks were empty. you had at least double the shots they’ve taken, no, no more shots. tell her no. 

“yes!” shauna said enthusiastically, ordering more for the table. when they arrived they were gone within seconds. ellie was finding it hard to hold back, she wanted to take you by the arm and walk you home herself. though, it seemed with every shot you took, your mood brightened. you were laughing, loudly, and making jokes with your friends. it seemed like you had completely forgotten about the departure of your best friend. ellie was happy you weren’t upset anymore, but the level of drunk you were worried her. 

that's until someone was standing behind shauna, and when ellie’s eyes wandered up to see who it was, she almost choked on her spit but quickly repressed it. it was the older woman and she was looking directly into your eyes, your laughter had subsided from the previous joke and you went silent, crossing your arms and shifting in your seat. 

the woman's eyes left yours quickly, and she placed a hand on shauna’s shoulder. shauna turned around, seeing the woman and got up from her seat, embracing her in a hug. “hey mom! what’re you doing here?”

mom? you’re fucking your best friends mom? ellie nearly fell off her high top seat, for the first time that night she took her eyes off of you, turning towards the bar just to take it all in. no, no, you’re a sweetheart. you wouldn’t do that, would you? ellie’s mind was racing, but her image of you never faltered in her mind because she quickly figured out just what was going on. 

your own parents leave you to move across the country and your best friend lets you move into her place until you get your own. she recalls one of your tweets she stumbled upon from a year ago,  

@yndoesartstuff: tfw ur moving into ur besties childhood home bc ur own parents dont want u

  —— @shuanamavisxx: my parents want u! adopted child frfr

yeah, they want you alright… 

shauna’s mom must have been very supportive of you, for you to fall for her trap anyway. that kind of attention from a mother must have felt good, and ellie decided that shuana’s mom knew what she was doing. prying on your own neglectful mommy issues to get into your pants. shes a fucking predator. ellie knew you were a grown woman, but shauna’s mom was clearly in her fifties, thats being nice, and she found it fucking disgusting that her mom would do that to you. and then to have the audacity to make you so dependant on her that you beg her for attention over texts. 

ellie was seething. 

and apparently so were you, because you quickly got up from the table, excusing yourself with a quick, “be right back!” trying to sound as chipper as possible, but ellie knew. 

you came up to the bar and ellie swiftly lowered her head into her phone. you were too drunk to notice, but ellie heard you order yourself yet another shot. she almost said no outloud, but refrained herself, feeling the heat in her body build up. but the bartender had her back, “you're cut off. here's a water.” he handed you a cold glass of water and your eyes rolled. 

“pleasseeee? im not even that drunk!” you fired back, pushing the water back towards him. he looked you up and down, and you smiled at him, holding up just one finger and mouthing the word please over and over again. the bartender caved, pouring you another shot. 

what a fucking idiot. 

he gave you the shot, which you took almost instantly. you stumbled back to the table with your friends, shauna’s mom still there making conversation. and ellie turned to the bartender, “are you blind? shes wasted,” 

the guy shrugged, “shes a good tipper.” 

ellie scoffed, turning her attention back to the table. 

“so wait mom, why are you here?” shauna asked, sitting back down in her seat. 

“i’m actually on a date,” her mom smiled, making quick eye contact with you before doing so with dina and cat to not seem suspicious. she pointed to a table near the band and when ellie looked, it was a man that sat at the table. 

“its not a date if you’re married,” shauna rolled her eyes, a laugh slipping out with her words. she turned and faced the man at the table, waving passionately at who ellie assumed to be her father. ellie was sick just watching, and she couldn’t imagine how you felt. she’s just taunting you at this point. 

ellie could see you shifting uncomfortably in your seat and soon enough you pulled out your phone. since your back was to her, ellie could see your screen was blank, but you muttered, “sorry gotta take this guys,” before you got up and left the bar, putting the phone up to your ears as if you were actually on the phone.

they let you leave without a second thought. don't they see how drunk you are? she was on her feet, pulling her wallet out of her pocket to put a twenty on the counter before storming out of the bar herself. she glanced around once she was outside, it had grown dark but she could spot you from a mile away. 

you were trying to wave down a cab, way too close to the road for her liking. you were crying too, and ellie’s heart sank at the sight. while waving down a cab, you checked your phone, the bright screen nearly blinding you as you did but your fingers were quick to type. your feet kept going as you typed to try and keep yourself up right, you were swaying and teetering all around the sidewalk. all of the cabs went past you, not wanting to pick up a drunk girl who might vomit in their car. your phone fell out of your hands as you were trying to type, landing harshly on the sidewalk and ellie stepped forward just a bit, ready to lie her way out of how she came to find you like this. 

as you bent down to pick up your phone, a man got it before you could. he held it out for you and as you went to reach for it, he pulled it away at the last second. because of course he did. there was only about five seconds of back and forth between you and this guy before ellie’s feet started to jog over to you. she heard the tail of the conversation as she approached. 

“...i’ll give it back if you agree to have drinks with me.” he spoke in a ragged voice, he was head to toe in dirt and grim. typical male, its disgusting. you didn’t deserve this.

“no, just give me my phone!” you shouted back at him, words slurred to oblivion. 

ellie didn’t waste a second. “she said no, man.” she came to your side, putting her arm in front of you to block him. she saw you stare at her out of the corner of her eye but she kept her focus on the guy. 

“a guy can’t try?” he said with a small laugh, still holding your phone out of reach. 

“if shes saying no, then take the fucking hint.” ellie could feel herself getting angier, the heat in her body rising to her cheeks and her one fist balled up by her side. she doesn’t want to think about what would have happened if she wasn’t here, but her mind plagues her with it. im your hero. and this guy is about to fucking die. 

“maybe i’ll keep it, sell it for some money,” he taunted, examining the phone like a douchebag. ellie had it under control, she knew this guy would cave eventually, at least one way or another. but you had other plans and when you tried to reach for the phone in his hands he slapped your arm away. 

ellie fully stepped in front of you, her jaw tightening as she did, and the guy continued to run his mouth. “what? this your fucking bitch or something?” 

she didn’t even think about it, her fist coming up strong and squaring this guy in his nose. he stumbled back, dropping your phone to the sidewalk yet again. she shook her fist in pain as you quickly grabbed your phone from the ground. his nose was bleeding and he was clinging to it like he was going to die. 

you were laughing, which is the last thing ellie expected. your laughter was ringing in her ears as the guy started to get back up, very slowly. “shit, c’mon!” you laughed again, way too drunk, but you did something else ellie wasn’t expecting, you took her hand and started to run in the opposite direction. she obviously followed you, sprinting beside you down the streets of new york until it felt like a good amount of distance had passed. 

turning one last corner you both slowed to a stop, you were trying to regulate your breathing as ellie checked around the corner before turning back to you. “you okay?” 

“i’m-i’m great,” you sighed, still catching your breath. youre still drunk. way too drunk. “you look so–” 

“let me take you home, you’re drunk,” 

“i’m not drunk and i know you from somewh–” 

“you are drunk, at least let me get you a cab,” 

“the vinyl store!” 

shit. “oh, oh yeah, i remember you.” ellie stammered out, hoping your level of drunkenness would hide her stumble. 

“ellie, right?” you slurred and ellie nodded her head, “oh shit, thats what i kept forgetting to do, i need that album you recommended me!” 

ouch. if you didn’t have the day you’ve had, or better yet, the past two weeks, ellie would be more upset. was our interaction that forgettable for you? no, it couldn’t possibly be, you were flirting with me. and now you stand here telling me you forgot about me? she tells herself it’s because you’re drunk, you’d never say these things to her if you were sober. 

“come by anytime for it, it’s no biggie,” it’s not like i made sure it was perfect for you within the hour. 

“how about now?” 

“no, no the stores closed and you should get home,” ellie knew you would persist, she just wanted to see it. 

“please,” you dragged out, putting on the prettiest smile you could. “i’m not that drunk, plus i could use the pick me up.” 

ellie smiled, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a small key. “you’re lucky i carry this with me,” she said with a light-hearted laugh. “it’s only a few blocks this way, can you make the walk?” 

“jesus, i am not that drunk!” you laughed along with her, starting to walk in the right direction. “look,” ellie watched as you started to walk in a straight line, arms out to keep your balance. 

you stumbled a bit, and you definitely weren’t walking in a straight line. you’re adorable. “wow, i’ve never seen anyone more sober.” ellie mocked you while you regained your balance. 

“thank you,” you replied, ignoring her sarcasm and you returned to walking normally beside her. “what a coincidence you ran into me.” 

“yeah, really weird, huh?” ellie faked a laugh, stuffing her hands in her pockets and keeping her eyes forward. 

“well, i owe you for helping me out,” you held out your phone, which was now cracked. “and for the album.” 

she shook her head, “nah, you don’t owe me anything.” 

after a few more minutes of walking the store came into sight, sitting between two large buildings, the closed sign burning red in the window. ellie pulled the key out of her pocket and started to unlock the door, with you happily standing idle behind her. 

she held the door open for you to go in first, it was dark inside and the smell of wooden boxes was pungent. but as ellie stepped in behind you and flicked on the light switch, the store came to life. “wait here, it’s in the back.” 

ellie went through the beads into her back office, searching around in her desk until she found it. it was sitting next to the red thong she had swiped from your apartment and when she pulled the vinyl from the drawer and spun around, you were right behind her. “it’s seriously creepy back here,” you took notice, looking around the small room while ellie slammed the drawer shut. 

you weren’t wrong, and that’s why ellie had asked you to stay up front. the paint had begun peeling off the walls years ago, and the room was only lit up by a bare bulb at the top of the room. “this where you keep your victims?” you joked, dropping your voice and toying with the papers on her desk. 

“not here, i got somewhere else i keep them,” ellie returned your joke, although she wasn’t exactly joking. but you don’t have to worry your pretty little head about that. “here, pink floyd’s best album at least, in my opinion.” 

you gracefully took it from her hands, examining it before looking back to her. “thanks,” anything for you. anything. 

you both wandered out of the back of the store, and ellie could sense that shauna’s mom was still plaguing your thoughts. you had gone quiet, staring longingly at the album in your hands. “you wanna tell me why you were so upset before?” she asked casually, flicking off the light in the back room. 

you sighed, “i’m a mess, that’s all.”  you leaned against the counter and ellie positioned herself behind it, just like how we met. 

ellie didn’t mind that you wouldn’t open up to her, to be fair you both were still basically strangers. strangers that flirt. strangers that save each other from themselves. 

“relationships suck,” 

“how’d you know it was about that?” 

ellie blinked, think, idiot, think. “well i mean, you got wasted and you were crying. i kinda just took a guess,” 

“you got me there,” you laughed, taking in a deep breath. “people never change, i can’t seem to get that through my head.” 

“the right people will,” was all ellie replied with, a small smile appearing on her face. 

“yeah, yeah you’re right.” there was silence for a moment as you both held eye contact before you broke away with an embarrassed smile. 

“you deserve better than whatever this asshole is putting you through, you know that?” 

“you don’t know me,” you said shyly, the drunkenness wearing off. “i could be horrible and deserve it.” 

“i highly doubt that,” ellie knew what you were thinking, if she only knew i was fucking my best friends mom. ellie didn’t care, she knew who you were. if it wasn’t for that borderline predator, you wouldn’t be in this position to begin with. she wanted you regardless. she needed you regardless. 

“yeah well, thanks ellie. i should get home, like you said i’m a little drunk.” 

“a little?” ellie laughed, earning a scoff from you.

you playfully pushed her shoulder back, “i can hold my liquor, thank you very much!” 

ellie ordered you a cab to take you home, she would’ve walked you home herself but you insisted on a cab, not wanting to bother her. ellie would end up at her usual spot across the street from your place anyway, so she didn’t fight it, knowing she would see you soon. 

she glared up from the sidewalk while you shut your door behind you, pulling your cracked phone out of your pocket. it didn’t take long for you to throw it to the couch with a huff, probably an unanswered text from shauna’s mom. ellie sighed, she would have hoped your little run in with her would have lifted your mood but as you sat down on your couch, slowly starting to cry once again, she knew it was a lot deeper than you were letting on. 

you won’t be upset for much longer, i’ll make sure of it. 

-------

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[hearts4hughes]

hits different | trevor zegras

(trevor zegras x fem! reader)

a/n: i’ve had this idea in my notes forever, and i’ve just managed to finish it😭 it took wayyyy too long, but i’m proud of this!

warnings: intoxication, alcohol, angst, light swearing

the pulsating bass reverberates through your body as you stand at the bar, drink in hand, trying to wash your hands of the memories of a love gone wrong. your mind drifts to the mess that trevor made of you and the hurtful images that linger in your thoughts.

you wondered if he had already moved on. if he was cooking for another girl at his apartment, or if he had strolled through the streets of anaheim with her hand in hand. had he forgotten about you? three years of love washed down the drain like dirt and filth as he confided in another woman with his love. just the mere thought sends waves of nausea through your body.

it didn’t make sense. you thought breaking up with him was the right decision, but since then, all you’ve felt was pure heartbreak.

it all started with the duck’s bad season. he was frustrated and stressed. he thought he was the problem- even though he wasn’t- and he went into an emotional hole. at the time, you didn’t understand what was happening. you thought he fell out of love with you, so as hard as it was, you broke up with him. the second the words flew off your tongue, he broke down- sobbing, yelling, begging, anything that would help you stay.

you can't help but reflect on how you used to move on so easily, like switching out partners and escaping town, but everything feels different now. the bars you visit play songs that remind you of what once was, and it hurts like nothing you've experienced before.

“y/n,” julia calls out, snapping you back into reality, “you have to stop thinking of him, it’s not going to help.” her hand rubs comfortingly up and down your back. you look at her, your face completely blank of emotion. it’s easier said than done to forget about someone who preoccupied so much of your time, and the alcohol in your system isn’t helping.

“i know, i just,” you stammer, “i just can’t escape him. it’s like he’s haunting me. everywhere i look i’m reminded of the memories we made.” she looks at you with pity.

“love is a lie, babe. you know this already.” she says- the same thing she’s been telling you since forever. “remember when you broke up with aaron?” she asks and you nod in response. “you thought he was the one and that you’d never ever move on, but after a little bit you did. you just need to give it time and you’ll get over him.”

whining, you grab your shot, throwing your head back and downing it. your nose scrunched as the alcohol burned down your throat. “but what if i don’t want to get over him, jul? i don’t want to forget about him. i just want to be with him, i just want trevor.” your words were slurred- almost incoherent.

people around you began to stare and watch the unfolding scene. protectively, julia brought you into a hug, shielding your face from everyone before they saw your tears. “let’s get you home, honey.” she cooed, wrapping her arm around your waist and helping you out of your seat.

-

julia brought you home, making sure you got into your house safely before driving away. you swung the front door open and stumbled into your apartment. the digital clock on the wall read 2:20am. you ripped off your heels, discarding them somewhere in your living room, and walking into your bedroom. your hair was a frizzy mess, lipstick smudged, mascara smeared everywhere, but you could care less.

you find yourself alone in your room, surrounded by memories of the past, with one particular item catching your eye- trevor’s hat. it sits on a shelf, seemingly untouched since the day you parted ways. the sight of it evokes a rush of bittersweet emotions, and you can't help but pick it up, feeling its fabric against your fingertips. the hat holds a piece of him, a piece of the love you once shared, and the weight of the memories is overwhelming.

as you hold the hat in your hands, a wave of nostalgia washes over you. memories of your time together flood your mind – the laughter, the inside jokes, the intimate moments shared under that very hat. you miss him, and the feeling intensifies with each passing day. the warmth and comfort that his presence once brought into your life are now a distant memory.

you bring the hat close to your chest, hugging it tightly as if it was him. the scent of his cologne, faint but still lingering, brings you back to those tender moments when he would embrace you, and your heart aches.

with each tear that falls, you let yourself feel the grief, the longing, and the emptiness that comes with a wound that hasn’t completely healed. you find yourself whispering his name into the fabric, wishing he were there, holding you.

suddenly, you hear a key turning in the door down the hallway. is it him? is it trevor? or has julia come to take you away from your apartment and the suffocating reminders of him?

the door closes and you hear footsteps approaching your room. the footsteps become louder as the mystery person gets closer. you close your eyes, not bothered to know who it is; however, a small part of you hopes, even wishes that it’s him.

“love?” he calls out, causing your eyes to shoot open. you see him standing in the doorway- a blurry version of him due to the alcohol and crying. a frown adorns his lips as he looks down at you. your tear stained face and bloodshot eyes give him a hint of what you were just doing. “oh y/n,” he coos, making his way over to you and repositioning you into his lap.

his arms snake around your body, pulling you close to his chest. you open your mouth to say something, but the words get caught in your throat. he presses reassuring kisses to the top of your head as you cry into his embrace.

"i’m so sorry, y/n," he whispers, his voice filled with remorse. "i messed up, and i’ve been a mess ever since you left." you try to find the right words to say, but your emotions are too overwhelming, your heart too raw. instead, you bury your face in his chest, holding on to him as if he might slip away again.

"fuck, i thought you moved on," you manage to say through your tears, your voice shaking. "all i could imagine was you with another girl, trev.”

he sights, gently rubbing your back. "no, love, there hasn't been anyone else. i’ve been miserable without you. you were always the one."

“i thought you had fallen out of love with me, that’s why i broke up with you.” your voice trembles with hurt as he feels a pang of guilt in his heart.

his expression softens, his eyes searching yours for understanding. "i was going through a rough time, and I didn't know how to handle it. i thought i was the problem, and i didn't want to bother you with my struggles. i never meant to hurt you." you move your head away from his body, staring deeply into his eyes. he’s been crying too. in that moment, you realize that he's hurting too, and maybe, just maybe, there's a chance for healing and forgiveness.

"i miss you, trevor," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. "my friends try to take me out to have fun and get drunk, but i always end up slurring your name until someone puts me in a car. they’re going to stop inviting me soon.” you joke- a coping mechanism you’ve had since you were young.

he lets out a small laugh, bringing his hand up to wipe away stray tears, “i’m here now," he replies, "and i want to try again, to make things right. i love you, and my life is a fucking wreck without you."

“i love you too,” your voice is soft and sincere. a smile graces his lips and for the first time since forever, your lips connect with his, reviving what you thought was gone.

[hannibals-favourite-meal]

(Can I request Loki x plus!size reader) so loki and the reader are best friends and the reader is in love with Loki but he has a girlfriend his girlfriend is Sylvie maybe one night during Toni's party Sylvie went to the restroom the reader notices Loki is alone so she decides to tell Loki how much she loves him more than a friend Loki is just rude to the reader and makes one comment about her weight and tells her that he loves Sylvie the reader leaves the party early and bucky noticed he goes after the reader to make sure she is ok bucky finds the reader crying in her room bucky goes into comfort her the reader tells bucky what Loki said to her bucky tells the reader Loki is just an asshole for not making sure the reader is ok after that party the reader and Bucky spent more time together and soon developed feelings for each other and they start dating Loki is jealous when he notices the reader Bucky together Loki and Sylvie broke up they got into a stupid argument when Loki told Sylvie about what the reader said to him Sylvie broke up with Loki because she thinks Loki does have feelings for the reader so it's lokis turn to confess his love to the reader loki tells the reader he is sorry for what he said to her and that he was too blind to notice that he loves the reader and that he wants to be with her the reader tells Loki that she loves him but only as a friend because she fell in love with bucky so the reader and Loki just stay friends.

.⋆｡Glue Myself Shut｡⋆.

One-sided Loki x plus size reader

Bucky x plus size reader

You figured he would feel the same or at least he would like you enough to let you down easy, but when your world begins to crumble, someone else’s hand gather the shattered pieces

Warnings: rejection, angst, unrequited love, fat shaming, Loki is an ass, friends to lovers, fluff, self-deprecation/hatred, implied smut

WC: 2k

A/N: I totally didn’t steal this title from a Noah Kahan song

Minors DNI

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The loneliness seemed to settle into your bones like a freezing wind. The chill words of your former friend ringing in your ears, slowly ripping your spirit apart. You knew he was with someone, someone wonderful. It was selfish and a downright asshole move.

But he was standing there, dressed in an all black suit, his raven hair falling perfectly around his face, and more importantly, he was alone. Your heart hammered so loudly your vision almost shook with the force of it. Your feet carried you over to him, through the throngs of people that had crashed Tony’s party, almost as if you were under some spell. He greeted you with a smile and offered a drink but you turned him down, your courage already weening.

There was a beat of silence where the music died and there was a lull in conversation. You couldn’t stop the words if you tried, they spilled from your lips, tumbling over themselves as you stammered. “I love you.” Everything froze and the smile on his face curled into a disgusted frown.

You couldn’t remember every single thing he said but it haunted you all the same.

“How dare you.”

“I’m with someone far better than you.”

“You’re a selfish child.”

“Why would I ever want to be with someone like you?” His green eyes seared into your soft body, picking apart each and every inch of yourself that you hated. You curled in on yourself, the final blow coming when Sylvie returned to his side once more, looking like the true goddess she was. She gave you a devastatingly kind smile.

“Oh darling, you look absolutely beautiful!” She cooed, slipping perfectly under Loki’s arm as he continued to glare at you, making it a point to place his left hand scandalously low on her slim hip. So, you ran.

The pain that ripped through you was like nothing you had experienced before. Your heart was broken, your trust shattered. Fat tears dripped down your face, ruining the carefully applied makeup that you spent hours on. It all felt so stupid now. No dress or makeup or hairstyle would change you into someone you could never be. None of it would make him love you.

You locked yourself away, ripping the nice dress you had bought to shreds before burying yourself in the soft sheets of your bed. Your tears had long-since dried, leaving streaks of mascara down your full cheeks and hiccuping breaths that just wouldn’t go away.

The door to your room opened quietly, letting in a sliver of light before it shut once more. There were three heavy footsteps and then your bed dipped with the weight of another person. “I’m not going to ask if you’re ok because you obviously aren’t so I’m going to ask what you need right now.” Bucky’s voice chased away the freezing draft and you breathed a sigh of relief.

Your arm shot out from beneath your blankets, offering a hand to your friend. His melodic chuckled rumbled through the room. The mattress shifted again and suddenly Bucky was under the covers, nose-to-nose with you, his smile glinting even in the dark.

“I was an asshole tonight.” His dark eyebrows furrowed, prompting you to continue. “I-I told Loki that I was in love with him.” A comforting yet cold hand laid itself upon your wide hip, giving you a comforting squeeze.

“He said that he could never love someone like me and he- fuck- he looked at me like I was the most disgusting he had ever seen. And then Sylvie was there and she was just so nice. And… I’m an awful person.”

Bucky huffed and then tugged you closer, forcing your face into his hard chest as his mismatched arms wound around you, keeping you in place. “You’re not an awful person. You made a slightly dumb decision but everyone does that. But dumb decisions do not excuse the way that Loki spoke to you.” And only then did you finally relax, exhaustion washing over you. “We’ll figure this out, I promise.”

——————

Your whole body felt sore from crying, but you woke up pleasantly warm, surrounded by muscles and blankets. You had fallen asleep still tucked against your friend and apparently he hadn’t let you go for a single second. 

The morning sun fell over you both, bathing him in a beautiful light that highlighted his strong jaw, dotted with day-old stubble. Your eyes traced over the curve of his face, taking in his round nose, the smile lines beginning to appear around his eyes and the corner of his pink lips. The dark circles that were almost permanently beneath his stunning grey eyes were only now fading, leaving only a tinge of purple. 

You ran a finger down his jaw, smiling as he shivered and his arms tightened around your waist. Your touch settled on the warm skin of his neck, taking comfort in the steady beat of his pulse below your fingertips. “Thank you.” You whispered, your eyes shutting once more.

When you awoke again, Bucky was still there, holding you close.

—————— 

It had been a little over two weeks since the ‘incident that will not be named under any circumstance’ and somehow, your whole life had turned around. You no longer cared when you saw your former friend pinning Sylvie to the wall, their lips fused together in a passionate kiss even if that was quickly becoming less frequent in the past few days. You brushed off the glances your way when you and Loki were alone in a room together, however rare that would be.

Because through it all, you had a knight in shining armour to come and steal you away. Bucky kept your gaze firmly on him, his fingers constantly intertwined with yours. He showered you with praise and funny stories, bringing you gifts and food. Bucky lifted you up, reminding you just how incredible you really were. He danced with you while no music played, he cuddled you during movie nights, he held your plump thigh whenever you sat next to him. 

And soon enough, he kissed you. It was the middle of the night in the communal kitchen. You both had just demolished a truly ungodly amount of takeout and a comfortable silence had fallen over you both. One hand laid on Bucky’s chest as your giggles died. His smile slowly fell into a frown, his eyelids fluttering. 

The cold metal of his left hand settled on your soft jaw. His eyes fell to your lips and suddenly he was close enough that you could feel his breath fanning over your face. You don’t remember who moved first but you did know that in that moment, everything else disappeared except for him.

And when the need for oxygen became too great, Bucky didn’t pull away very far. There was barely an inch between your lips as you caught your breath. He beamed at you. “I’ve waited for so long to do that.” You smiled and pulled him in for another kiss.

Your sides hurt from laughing as you and Bucky climbed the steps up to the Avengers Tower. Your whole body trembled with giggles. “Are you serious? Steve really did that?” Bucky chuckled along with you, moving all your shopping bags into one hand so he could pull the door open for you.

“Yeah this kid who was a buck even soaking wet tried to climb up the side of a fucking building to rescue a cat.” Your giggles resumed again with an added fervour. Just as the elevator doors opened, another voice called out to you. Both you and your boyfriend turned to the source of the sound.

Loki was striding to you with a purpose, jaw set, eyes blazing with an emotion you couldn’t quite pinpoint. Bucky stiffened behind you but the comforting touch at the base of your back told you that he wasn’t mad at you. “I need to speak to you, in private.” 

“I don’t know if that’s such a great idea, all things considering.” Bucky’s words escaped his lips almost like a growl, throaty and dangerous. And you were ashamed to admit that it sent a shiver of arousal down your spine.

“Bucky, it’s ok. It’ll just be a minute.” Your gaze flicked to your partner but he just nodded.

“I’ll be upstairs, call if you need me.” He gave your elbow a secretive squeeze and disappeared behind the stainless steel doors but not without a warning glare to the other man. As soon as Bucky was out of sight, Loki breathed a sigh of relief, his shoulders falling.

“Firstly, I do wish to apologise for how I treated you the night of Stark’s party. I was cruel to you for no reason at all and for that all I can say is that I’m sorry. You are my friend and a beautiful woman. That night I made a grave mistake.” The pounding of your heart was so reminiscent of that night. The fear, the anxiety but this time, you knew what he would say and you knew that it was now your turn. Loki took in a deep breath, his hands trembling at his sides.

“My dove, I am in love with you too. I was too blind by my own pride to see it at first but Sylvie knew. She left me, she told me that you were the one that I truly loved. So here I am, begging you to give me a chance.” He shocked you by grabbing ahold of your hands and tugging them to his cold lips. “Please my love, please let me worship you the way you deserve.”

Pity curled in your gut as he kissed your knuckles. “Loki.” He flinched and immediately released you. “I am truly sorry that you and Sylvie broke up, she obviously made you happy. And I am sorry that my actions led to this but you cannot ask me to give you a chance when you showed your true colours and hurt me so badly. You were not my friend at that moment. You made me doubt my self-worth and you made me feel awful. I know that what I did was shitty too but that is no excuse.”

“Besides that, Bucky and I have started seeing each other and I think it’s going pretty well so far. We can be friends but the trust that I had with you before is gone.” Your voice had lifted to a gentle coo, like it could possibly soften the blow. “I have nothing left to give you.”

——————

Bucky wouldn’t admit out loud that he was anxious. So instead, he cleaned. He knew that you had feelings for him, maybe not as deep as love- yet but only a fortnight ago, you were declaring your love for the man who, he presumed, was now telling you that he felt the same. 

Bucky loved you with his whole heart, he always had. Not only were you kind and patient with a laugh that made him melt, but you were beautiful, both inside and out. Anyone would be lucky to have you and he could not comprehend not only how Loki rejected you so cruelly but how you gave an old soldier like him a chance.

He was so caught up in scrubbing the already clean dishes that he didn’t notice the figure standing in the kitchen doorway, silently watching him work. “If you clean those dishes anymore, they’ll disappear.” His whole body sagged as you spoke.

Immediately, he abandoned his work and sprinted to you. You laughed as he pulled you into his arms, burying his face in the crook of your neck. He didn’t have to say anything and neither did you. Everything he needed to know was in the way you held him close, how you kissed his temple, in how  you tangled your fingers in his hair. 

“So… do you want go fuck my brains out and then get some ice cream?” Bucky hauled you into his arms and ran faster than he ever had in his life.

(I couldn't help myself)

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[dreamywriter143]

I Wish I Knew

Genre : ANGST, Slow-Burn, Unrequited love, SFW,Romance.

Status: Oneshot-Completed

Parings : Neteyam X Reader,

Warnings: Sad Neteyam, Unrequited love, Mutual Pinning, Mentions of blood/bullets, Mentions of alcohol and consumption (Please be advised), Panic attacks.

Inspired by; Bad Habit by Steve Lacy

Summary: Neteyam and Y/n have been joined at the hip since they were children. Growing feelings for one another was inevitable due to their close proximity. But Neteyam always suppressed his feelings in fear of losing his friendship with her. But as they grow into adults he can’t help but wonder, had he missed his chance?

Word count: 5.9k

———————————————————————

“How did you find me?” Neteyam asks, his eyes strained forward. He didn’t bother turning to face her as she set herself down. Her feet mirrored his as she dangled them over the edge of the cliff.

Neteyam knew it was her, he didn’t have to look to confirm who it was. He knew the moment she softly landed her Ikran, the coo of the creature he knew by heart because that always signaled her arrival. Her scent wafted through the light breeze as the air caused his body to freeze up. It was a scent he memorized. Because it smelt like her, because it was her. 

“Call it intuition?” She chuckles softly, the breeze picking up in the slightest. Her braided locks clacking against one another, the sound of the beads crashing caused Neteyam to quickly glance her way. 

Y/n peered up into the sky, the stars mirrored amongst her e/c irises beautifully. Neteyam stopped himself from getting lost in them, which he caught himself doing often. It was weird considering she was his dearest friend, his oldest friend. He just couldn't help the fluttery feeling that consumed him whenever she was near. He didn't know when it started, but as he grew, so did his feelings.

Neteyam and Y/n grew up joined at the hip, even though she was younger by one year the girl never hesitated to follow Neteyam to his duties. Always marveling at how he slowly but surely became such a great warrior, outranking all in his age group. Neteyam also adored her, he respected how she tried to become a warrior herself. Even though she fell short many times, it never deterred her from her goal. That same goofy smile plastered on her face even when her body was littered with bruises. 

Neteyam thought of her as a distraction at one point, but as they both grew up he realized how much he needed her support. Someone to talk to, someone to pour all his raw emotion on. And Y/n was always eager, her shoulders waiting for him to lean on as the days of stress pulled him down. It was as if she always knew how and what he was feeling.

 “What did he do this time?” Y/n whispers softly. 

Neteyam’s ears twitch to the sound of her voice, laced with concern and question. Neteyam had once again been on the receiving end of his fathers words. He was tasked to help Lo’ak with his tracking skills, but that skxawng decided to run mid session, almost getting eaten by a threatened mother Pululukan. Neteyam had barely made it in time to save Lo’ak as well as himself. The array of leaves covered in ointment scattered all over his body proved that it was indeed a close call. 

“He almost got eaten by a mother Pululukan” he replies solemnly.

 He catches the way Y/n’s eyes scrunch together at the mental image. Her brows furrowing together, her lips forming into a frown. 

“Let me guess, you took the blame?” Y/n asks, more like declares. 

She knew Neteyam like the back of her hand. Of course he took the blame from his brother, always has and always will. It’s just that each time he did, he never could recover the pieces that Jake tore apart upon each lecture. That’s where Y/n came in, always ready to piece him back together. 

“You shouldn’t protect him all the time. He’s 15 Neteyam, he has to realize the stunts he pulls have consequences” Y/n says, her body turning to face him. Neteyam averts his eyes, not wanting her to catch his gaze that was already lingering on her. 

“It’s my job, I’m the eldest son. If I don’t watch over my siblings, who will?” Neteyam replies back, refusing to look her in the eyes. Y/n sighs out in defeat. She knew how much Nteeyam loved and cared for his siblings, she felt the same way being the only child. That's why she stuck to the family like glue. As if they were a second family.

“Then who will have your back?” She asks, her voice laced with concern. Neteyam finds his lips twitching at her words. She never failed to surprise him with her caring nature. It was astonishing to the young warrior that someone like her, who was so kind and nurturing, was also a warrior. Someone that equaled his skills at times.

He turns around to face her, locking eyes. He felt his breath hitch at their close proximity, how her eyes shone under the moonlight with such allure. He felt like he was being sucked in, and he didn’t feel it within himself to deny the feeling. 

“I was hoping you would”  a smile twitches along his lips. 

Y/n let’s out a giggle, her eyes filling with a twinkle which left Neteyam starstruck. Oh how beautiful she looked under the moonlight, it had to be a sin. 

“I thought that was a given” she teases, playfully nudging her shoulder against his. The feeling sent a jolt of electricity through his body, causing a pleasurable shiver to run along his spine. It was moments like these that made him feel alive, that made him feel sane. So much stress has been put upon him since birth, all washing away with a mere smile. 

“Just making sure” Neteyam easily replies back, opting to lean against her shoulder. Something they did often when they sought each other for comfort. Y/n hums happily, leaning her weight against his. She rests her head against him, breathing in the night sky. 

“You are obligated to take care of your siblings Neteyam. That I respect. Just….take care of yourself too, ok?” Y/n suggests softly. Neteyam lets out a sigh, nodding his head, agreeing with her words. Seeming satisfied by his non verbal response Y/n smiles wide.

 “And I’ll always be here for you Neteyam. I’ll never leave your side. You are my best friend after all” she teases her eyes locking onto the moon, oh how majestic it looked.

Neteyam thickly swallows the lump in his throat. At that moment the feeling of serenity left him. He enjoyed his moments with Y/n. Over the years it seems as though these particular moments held all his happiness. It felt great when he was naïve to his feelings.

At first he was confused as to what the quicken heartbeats meant when he would stare into her eyes. He questioned the butterflies in his stomach, and an unfamiliar fluttery feeling whenever she gazed at him. 

It took him a while, but once he realized what he was feeling, it was already too late. The feeling had grown without his knowledge. What was once a simple crush grew to infatuation. He felt cursed, cursed to loving his friend who didn’t love him the same way. The unconditional love that seemed to grow year by year. 

~~~~~~ 

“Shhh, don’t speak!” Kiri shushs, crouching down near the tent. The close call with the RDA left quite an impact with the Sully children and Y/n. After Y/n had decided to accompany Lo’ak and Spider on their adventure, all so she could keep a watchful eye on Tuk. They got caught by the RDA. Y/n desperately held Tuk within her grasp all while her tswin was harshly being held against her.

The moment Neteyam heard Y/n’s name over the com an unexplainable dread came over his form. They had his siblings, they had Y/n. What if he was late? What if he couldn’t save her in time? As he quickly showed his parents the quicker way he was determined to find her. He was determined to ensure her safety. 

Neteyam didn’t have to think twice about going against his fathers orders and got involved right away. Because he knew, if it were the other way around, Y/n wouldn’t hesitate to disobey orders from her leader to save his siblings, himself included. 

The relief that flooded Neteyam’s system was like waves after waves as he realized everyone was safe and unscathed. He pulled Y/n tightly against him, relishing in her heat as she shook under his hold. Sobs racking her body in full force. She was terrified by what had transpired and Neteyam felt useless being unable to console her. 

As the siblings and Y/n eavesdrop on the parents' conversations, Neteyam keeps a firm grasp of Y/n’s hand. Ever since the incident Y/n has been desperately latching into him. Her fear is getting the best of her. Neteyam felt horrible for what she went through, but loved the feeling of her needing him, wanting to hold him. 

“He had our children. He had them under his knife!” Jake hisses.

Y/n audibly gulps. Was he actually suggesting they leave? Flee the clan? Y/n felt her heart drop to her stomach with a sickening feeling. They would leave her, her second family would leave her here alone for their own safety. And Y/n couldn’t do anything about it. She wanted them safe more than anything, but the fear of them leaving caused her to choke up with unbridled sadness. 

Feeling her eyes sting with tears Y/n pushes herself into Neteyam’s embrace. He was shocked at first but welcomed it. Would this be the last time he held her? Feel her pressed up against him like this? He would wake up every day not seeing her face? Neteyam’s throat closes up at the thought, letting Y/n nuzzle into the crevice of his neck. He wraps one hand around her for support as he bites lips furiously. He couldn’t cry, as much as he wanted to. He is a warrior after all. He had to stay strong.

“What about Y/n? She was protecting Tuk, they know she is close to the family. They will hunt her down Ma’Jake” Neytiri cries in fear.  

Both Neteyam and Y/n freeze up at her words. Lo’ak and Kiri glance at the duo, horror stricken as well. It was true, Y/n tried her best to cover Tuk during the entire altercation. They didn’t bother inspecting her hands while they were focused on Lo’ak and Kiri. But her involvement meant they knew her. And where to find her.

 “I’ll speak to her parents. It’s not safe for her here” Jake says, causing Y/n to gasp in shock. She covers her mouth before looking at each Sully. Confirming what she heard was true. He was suggesting she go with them. 

Feeling an overwhelming amount of emotion Y/n abruptly stands up, before sprinting towards her tent. Neteyam moves to follow her but Kiri stops him midstep. Her expression of worry for her friend.

“Give her some space, brother” 

~~~~~~~~~

“How did you find me?” Y/n asks softly, her back facing Neteyam as he took tentative steps towards her. He purposely made sure his steps were heard, he didn’t want to startle her after all they’ve been through the past few days. If he wanted to go unnoticed, he would have succeeded. He was very silent with his footing. 

“Call is intuition?” Neteyam lightly teases, taking a seat beside her. His shoulders slide against her, feeling her body cold against him. Neteyam flinches upon contact. How long had she been out here? 

“Eywa Y/n, you’re freezing. How long have you been out here?” He questions his eyes trained in her. She turns her head to face him, her puffy cheeks covered with the stains of her tears she had shed a while ago. She sighs out, shrugging her shoulders in response. Neteyam frowns, he felt sick to his stomach seeing her like this.

The past two days have been utter hell for him. After Jake declared the decision to the family he went on about how Tarsem would be the next Olo'eyktan. Not to mention when Jake left to relay the news to Y/n’s  parents. They were upset at first but stressed for her future, they agreed that for her future she needed to flee. For her own safety. Y/n’s parents reluctantly agreed to the request, she would be unsafe the longer she stayed within the village. Ever since that, Y/n had been actively avoiding the Sully’s, Neteyam included. 

Neteyam lost his birthright, and best friend all in one day. 

He's been through a rollercoaster of emotion's and sadness the past few days, but he was able to come to terms with it. His family came first, if he were to lose his title for that, then so be it.

Neteyam also wanted to approach Y/n many times but respected his sister's wishes to give her space. By the fourth day he was fed up, he couldn’t stay away from her. He had to ensure she was ok, he also missed her terribly. Thus why he came all the way out here in search of her. He missed her terribly and couldn’t help but blame himself for everything that has happened. 

“I’m sorry…” Neteyam whispers, his voice cracking under everything he felt. Y/n’s eyes snap to him, concerned glossing over irises in confusion. 

“W-what? For?” She asks scooting closer to him. Neteyam clenched his hands into fists.

“For you getting involved….for forcing you to leave everything you’ve known, your family, your friends, for us..” he admits, head bowed down shamefully. Y/n lets out a shaky sigh, taking her small hands and using them to cup Neteyam’s cheeks. He allows her to lift his face up to meet her waiting eyes, all while still cupping his cheeks. 

“Neteyam…..I was sad, the first day. But I’m at peace with it. I will not endanger our people, my family, just so I can stay here. I’m fine with coming along with your family. In fact, I’m grateful your family thought of me and my protection” Y/n says softly. Neteyam lets out the breath he was holding, his shoulders relaxing significantly. He felt a huge weight being lifted off his shoulders. He couldn’t explain how happy he was to hear this. She was ok with coming with him, she was at peace with it. How could he not feel happy? 

“Then….why have you been avoiding us?….have I done something to upset you? Has someone else done something?” Neteyam asks, he tries to play it off as a regular question but it came out as a plea. His need for her seeping through his words. Y/n thickly swallows, as if his question caused her to choke up again. Neteyam sits up straighter, placing his hands over hers. Y/n clears her throat before taking a deep breath. 

“I-it’s you…”  she says, causing Neteyam to go slightly stiff. 

“All your life you’ve been training to become an Olo'eyktan. You’ve worked so hard, proved yourself and gained so much respect amongst the people. I know, because I was always there to watch you from afar. Admiring your strength and vigor-“ Neteyam felt a sad smile twitch along his lips. She’s always been there, always watching him grow. Always seeing him.

“-once I heard Tarsem being announced as the next leader, it was as if a part of me shattered…..here I am, watching helplessly as my best friends dream slips through his fingers….all because I couldn’t try hard enough to keep Lo’ak from venturing out” Y/n croaks, tears streaming down her face. 

Neteyam is quick to wipe the fresh tears away from her cold skin. The past few days Y/n had been beating herself over the fact that she may be the reason Neteyam had lost his birthright. What he dreamt of every day. In a way, his dream became apart of her dream as well, as she watched him grow.

Neteyam pulls her in for a hug, his heart soaring but his heart crumbling. “It’s not your fault. Please don’t blame yourself Syulang. Please” Neteyam begs, feeling Y/n shake that much harder under his hold, unable to hold back her cries of pain. After a while Y/n settles down, slightly pulling back to wipe her eyes. 

“Neteyam, I-“ 

“Don’t you dare apologize” he interrupts her, swiping the streaks of tears along her cheeks. His gaze stern. Y/n seems to frown at his word but understands he didn’t want to speak of the matter any longer. 

“I was sad,” Neteyam says, causing her ears to twitch with attention.

“I was sad that I’ve lost my goal, that I have to leave everything I’ve known growing up. I lost my title that I worked so hard for, but I can prove myself again. I know it. This isn't the end Y/n, but a new beginning…also a part of me is happy knowing I have my family to rely on….happy that I’ll have you” he admits, words that felt like stones to his heart because he knew Y/n wouldn’t interpret his words for what he actually wanted to say.

‘I love you, I need you with me’

“Oh Neteyam. I’ll follow you to the ends of Pandora. I’ll always be by your side.” She croaks, pulling him in for a tight embrace. Neteyam presses his head against her temple, inhaling her scent. A scent that always gave him comfort.

“I know, I’ll always be there for you Y/n. Always'' 

~~~~~~~~~

“Watch his head!!!” Lo’ak hisses, struggling to pick Neteyam up on the rocks. Tsireya steadies his legs, Y/n and Spider holding his side as they haul him over as gently as possible. Y/n winces at the sharp pain on her arm, her tears staining her cheeks. She helps set Neteyam down as he looks up at her, concern lacing his painful expression. 

“Y-y/n” He whimpers out, seeing the distant look in her eye. That of fear. 

After Neteyam and Lo’ak decided to find  Spider deeper in the ship, they didn’t notice how Y/n snuck in after them. She stayed quiet making sure to stay a few feet behind them, her knife in the ready to assist them if needed. 

A lot has happened over the past few months, the quick adaptation to the sea, the Metkayina clan not accepting them and dealing with the RDA once again was like hit after hit. Y/n had failed to keep Kiri safe when the Ikran snatched her away; she refused to allow Neteyam and Lo’ak to get hurt under her watch. 

Her attention snaps back to Neteyam and Lo’ak jumping down taking on some of the human soldiers. Y/n doesn’t even hesitate jumping down to assist them while Neteyam and Lo’ak stare at her in shock. Seeing a soldier get up she grabs the gun off the floor, shooting the man shakily. 

“Y/n! What are you doing here?” Neteyam demands, snatching the gun from her shaking hands. Y/n looks over at the three who stare at her in astonishment.

 “I can’t let you do this alone. Now let’s get out of here!!” Y/n encourages her ears twitch at the sound of rapid footsteps nearing them. As they run away from many soldiers, Y/n sends Lo’ak and Spider to jump into the water safely while Neteyam fires the gun to distract the soldiers shooting their way. 

“Go! Go!” Neteyam hollers, his eyes focused on the soldiers who refuse to give up. 

“Not without you!” Y/n demands, her eyes widening, seeing the soldier come closer for a clearer shot. “Shit!” Y/n shoves Neteyam pulling him with her. She glances over her shoulder seeing the avatar directly point the barrel of his gun towards Neteyam. Towards his chest. Using her adrenaline to her advantage she shoves Neteyam into the water, tumbling after him. 

The moment she crashed into the sea she heard the happy screams of Lo’ak and Spider as she desperately looked for Neteyam. She noticed the crimson in the water before she caught sight of Neteyam, holding onto his arm in pain. 

“I’ve been s-shot” he struggles out. The three words Y/n never wanted to hear. 

As she helped Tsireya pull Neteyam into the Iiu she was shocked to see the blood in the water increase. All of a sudden she feels a sting on her side, glancing down she is able to see a flesh wound, where the bullet had grazed her as well. It seemed as though colliding her body against Neteyam caused the bullet to gaze at her arm as well as his. 

Y/n snaps her attention back to Neteyam as he regulates his breathing. Luckily the bullet hasn't penetrated his arm, but the gash was deep enough to cause a lot of blood. Neteyam was about to pass out from the blood loss. Y/n shakily puts pressure on his wound, drowning out the sounds around her. 

Tsireya audibly gasps seeing blood pour out of Y/n’s arms. The girl was in shock, therefore not registering how everyone was around her, as well as her own injury. Her attention solely focused on the wound  as she tried to stop the bleeding. 

“Y/n!! Your arm!!” Lo’ak screams in hysterics, his father rushing towards them. Seeing Neteyam on the floor he clutches down, noting there was no wound on his chest, just his arm. 

“Is there an exit wound?” He asks crouching down to his level. Neteyam groans back, glancing between his father and Y/n.

“N-no, it's just a graze….Y/n save m-me” Neteyam says through clenched teeth, pain cursing through the entirety of his arm. Jake looks at Y/n  with relief but it disappeared upon seeing her own gash.

“S-she’s hurt dad, p-please” Neteyam whispers, seeing how Y/n’s eyes were glazed onto him, as if she were in a trance, in her own world. She didn’t register her pain or when Jake had instructed Tsireya to hold onto her wound to stop the bleeding.

 “Y/n '' Neteyam calls again, causing her to break eye contact, resting on his face. Her initial shock wore off at the sound of his concerned tone. 

“You’re hurt” Neteyam breathes out, feeling some relief flood into his system with her pressing tightly against the wound. Y/n shakes her head.

 “You Skxawng you almost died. Don’t worry about me” she assured shakily, sending a tear sticker Tsireya a small smile. Neteyam coughs, his feeble attempt to laugh at her tone. She sounded like a mother bird, always stressing over everyone including him. 

“T-thank you. For saving me” 

Y/n smiles at his words, her eyes glossing with warmth. She felt panic rise deep within her at the sight of so much blood. But seeing him alert and responding proved that he was ok. He was alive.

“I told you I’ll always be there for you. I’ve got your back” 

~~~~~~~~~ 

5 years. 

It’s been five years since that fateful day. The day they won against the sky people, since the day Tonowari and Ronal accepted them as true Metkayina. One with the Reef.

Since then the Sully’s and Y/n have accomplished a lot. Lo’ak was finally recognized as a man, completing his Iknimaya. He was Metkayina now, able to prove Payakan as a hero as the people accepted him.

Neteyam also completed his Iknimaya. Claiming a Tulkun for himself as well as a Tsurak on his first try. He was known as a fierce warrior amongst the clan, Tonowari and Jake were greatly proud of his accomplishments. He had proven himself, and was seen as a mighty warrior. He finally felt like he gained what he once lost.

Kiri and Y/n also finished their Iknimaya with equal results, following Ronal and her teachings as Tsahik. And today, Tuk had finally completed hers. Thus the celebration that had been held for the majority of the day in celebration of her. Her feats at such a young age were being appreciated greatly. 

Once the celebration had died down, the group decided to sit around a fire, taking sips of the celebratory alcohol to reminisce about the past.

“Do you remember when Payakan swallowed you whole? I was so scared that you were sent to Eywa!! If it weren't for Tsireya and Ao’nung then I would have had to throw hands with a Tulkun in your memory” Neteyam lets out a booming laugh, Tsireya cracking up next to her mate. Lo’ak rolls his eyes playfully at his brother's antics, nudging Tsireya who sat beside him, their hands clutching small cups of liquor.

Y/n laughed aloud at the memory, she sat perched on a large log beside Kiri and her mate Roxto. His hand held her against him as she laid her head on his shoulder. The alcohol evading her system.

 “Oh yea? Who was it that fell face first into the sea right after they tamed their Tsurak?” Lo’ak taunts, Roxto snickering loudly at the memory. Neteyam frowns, drowning his drink in one go. Y/n giggles, her eyes crinkling with happiness.

 “I have a better story, how about that time Lo’ak burst into tears when getting his first tattoo? I remember the big fat tears rolling down his eyes'' Y/n teases causing Lo’ak to scoff loudly. Tsireya giggles at the memory, how Lo’ak clutched her hand in a vise-like grip that left a bruise. 

“Hey! Not fair, you’re defending Neteyam again!” Lo’ak accuses causing  Y/n to send a playful wink across to Neteyam. Neteyam smiles, his heart thumping wildly against his chest. He didn’t know if it was the alcohol but Y/n looked absolutely breathtaking under the moonlight. Her hips grew fuller over the years, her bust also growing a few sizes, beautifully adorned with shells of the sea. Her hair had grew straight down to her waist, the tattoos running down from her arm all the down to her thighs. She looked stunning. 

“Neteyam?” Tsireya calls his attention to her, his head snapping towards her. Embarrassed to have been caught gazing towards Y/n’s direction.

“Sorry, I blanked out for a second. The alcohol is strong. What was the topic?” He asks, glancing at Y/n who takes a tiny sip of the sweetly tangy drink. 

“We were talking about crushes. Lo’ak said he didn’t like anyone but me-“ Tsireya furiously blushes as Lo’ak smirks wide. “-I admitted to a childish crush I had as a child that died down a long time ago. Before I met Lo’ak. Now it's your turn. Have you had any crushes?” She asks.

Neteyam feels hot under everyone’s watchful stare. He forced down  the sick feeling in his stomach, as he forced his stare on the fire in front of him. He didn’t stare at Y/n across from him, the girl who had his heart for years. The love that seemed to always  torture him, knowing he could never have her. How could he love her? Was he even worth her? These questions always kept his confession at bay after all these years. 

He didn’t feel worthy of himself and he feared losing her altogether. He feared that if he spilled the longing he had for her, she’d run away and never turn back. Which is why he never even attempted to confess to her, painfully opting to watch from afar. Loving her from afar. It didn't hurt much since he grew accustomed to the pain, learning how to numb the burning jealousy and sadness within. He knew she didn't love him, that was the only thing that keep him sane.

There was no other female that ever held a candle to her, no other girl who took his breath away. No girl who caused his soul to smile with pure joy. There was no one that took up his heart the way she did, from the very young age of 13. It had always been her. 

“Not really. Back home I was so busy with my duties I hardly had time to look for a potential mate let alone a crush. I did feel something once…… but it ended quickly. It also didn’t help that I had to stay vigilant and watch over my troublesome siblings”  he states, earning a glare from both Kiri and Lo’ak. Neteyam was shocked at how easily he was able to lie through his teeth. He added a tiny bit of the truth in there to make his story believable. 

 Neteyam stifles a laugh, looking anywhere else but Y/n. He didn’t want his feelings to betray him, after many long years.

The group seems satisfied with his response as they move on to Roxto, then Kiri. Both admitting to never having feelings for anyone else until they met each other. How romantic. 

Then, it landed on Y/n. 

“So, did you have any childhood crushes??” Tsireya asks giddily, genuinely interested. Y/n giggles covering her mouth with her hand, her cheeks turning purple in embarrassment. Neteyam finds himself smiling at the gesture. 

“I did, and it wasn't a childhood crush. It was serious until I realized I didn’t have a shot and I had to move on” Y/n starts, every eye on her. All equally invested.

 Neteyam goes stiff. She liked someone? It wasn't a child-like crush, it was serious. Who was it? Had he turned her down? How didn't he notice? Neteyam is bombarded with these questions as he leans closer into the circle. Now fully invested. 

“Who was it?” Roxto asks, sitting on the edge of his seat. Y/n chuckles, sending Neteyam a quick apologetic glance. Neteyam’s eyes furrow in question. 

“It was Neteyam….” 

Neteyam’s ears flatten against his head, his breathing comes to a halt at her words. 

“I loved Neteyam for the longest time, ever since I was a little  girl. I always followed him around” Y/n adds chucking at the memory fondly. Everyone shares smiles, wanting to hear more.

 All while Neteyam sat frozen in time. She loved him? Ever since she began following him? ‘How could I have been so blind….w-we both l-loved each other?’ Neteyam felt stupid, he hated himself for not noticing. All that time thinking he wasn't good enough, all that time worrying he’d lose their friendship over a confession. All of the pain that came with watching her from a distance. All that pain. All of it could have been avoided. 

“Did you know?” Lo’ak asks causally causing Neteyam to jolt up. 

“N-no I n-neve-“ 

“I made sure he didn’t notice. I honestly never thought I had a chance which is why I decided to keep everything under wraps” Y/n quickly cuts in. In her eyes Neteyam looked disgruntled and slightly uncomfortable. When in reality he was beating himself up for being so foolish.

“How did you get over it?? When did you get over it?” Kiri asks, causing Roxto to nudge her. “You don’t have to answer if that makes you uncomfortable!” Kiri quickly adds, 

“It’s fine, we're all adults here. And it was a while ago I guess…I took many years to get over him. But eventually I did and now I’ve finally moved on '' Y/n looks at Neteyam apologetically. 

“I’m sorry Neteyam, this must be so uncomfortable. Hearing that your best friend once had a crush on you” Y/n says apologetically causing Neteyam to finally find his voice in the middle of his shock. 

“No. It’s f-fine. If I knew I would hav-“ Neteyam whispers his feeling blubber inside of him. He felt he had to let her know, know that he felt the same. That he still feels the same. His feelings almost slip past his lips as Ao’nung walks towards the group with an annoyed sigh. Holding a tray filled with drinks accompanied with a gourd. 

“Next time you guys want drinks, don’t order the future Olo'eyktan to grab them for you” Ao’nung grumbles, handing Tsireya the tray who passes it around. Neteyam mechanically accepts his glass, his eyes sorrowfully watching as Ao’nungs seats himself beside Y/n. Pulling her into an embrace. 

Y/n stares up into his eyes lovingly as Ao’nung places a careful kiss on her cheek. 

Neteyam feels sick to his stomach as he watches the mated pair cuddle against one another. His entire life he suppressed his feelings. Feelings he thought were forbidden. Dwellings he thought would harm his friendship with the girl he longed and dreamed about. 

He painfully watched the last 4 years as Y/n and Ao’nung got closer together, eventually announcing their union before Ewya. Neteyam felt a part of him die that day, but he was okay and happy knowing she found someone she loved, after all, what he felt was unrequited, she didn't love him back. Therefore he never had a chance. 

But now, all that self talk and self reassurance crumbled as Y/n had confessed she once loved him. For so long. 

There was a perfect moment in time where  they both mutually loved another. 

‘Only if I wasn't a coward’ Neteyam cursed, his eyes stinging with the unshed tears as he watched Y/n nuzzle against Ao’nung. Her mate for life.

He missed his chance, long ago. But now he would have to live with the knowledge he lost her not because she didn’t leave him back. But because he was too much of a coward to fight for his love for her. 

“Hey, are you ok?” Lo’ak whispers quietly, ignoring the chattering group. He made his way over to his brother who had been dead silent for a while. He catches the glossy look in his brother's eyes, how he watched Y/n from across the fire. A look filled with longing, sadness and regret.

 Lo’ak felt his stomach lurch at the thought that Neteyam might be on the verge of crying. 

“Neteyam?” He calls again, Neteyam finally turning to his brother. His eyes blown wide as he struggles to hold in his tears. Small gasps escaped his body that caused his body to shake. Lo’ak realizes the symptoms Neteyam was having, a start of a panic attack. He quickly pulls his brother up, letting him rest all his weight against his body. This catches the attention of the group as Y/n stands up, her face scrunched with worry. 

“Nete-"

“It’s fine, he’s feeling sick. Told you guys he can’t hold his liquor” Lo’ak jokes teasingly. He tosses Tsireya a knowing look before excusing himself from the group. All the while having Y/n’s  worried stare focus on the retreating boys. 

As they walk a good few feet away Lo’ak glances at his brother's defeated face. The tears run along his cheeks freely as he tries to regulate his breathing. His face was in complete mourning, as if he had lost something of high value.

Lo’ak was able to put the pieces together, Why he had been acting differently. Why his brother always looked at Y/n as if she held the stars, in complete wonderment. And why he looked completely distraught hearing Y/n confess about her past feelings. 

“It was her….you loved her didn’t you” Lo’ak states causing Neteyam to whimper out in pain.

 “Yes” he gasps. He felt as though his world was crumbling around him. 

“It has always been her” 

Lo’ak felt his heart crumble, his brother, the mighty warrior looking defeated as the life in his eyes disappeared. It was as if he felt as though he had nothing else to live for. 

Neteyam choked in another sob, unable to control himself any longer. He desperately wished he could go back in time. Tell his younger self to open his eyes. To take the step he couldn’t take.

He couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if he was aware of her feelings back then. Would they have been mated? Would they be this stupidly in love? Would they begin to start a family Neteyam always dreamed about. Neteyam couldn’t help but wonder. 

‘I wish I knew…..’ his vision became blurry with the endless tears. His sobs taking him full force, causing him to shake in Lo’ak’s arms. 

‘I wish I knew you wanted me’

____________________________________________________________

A/N: Hi!!!! I hope you enjoyed, I was was in a angsty mood so I decided to finish this idea I had for a while. I'm not good at writing angst so this is my attempt! Let me know what you think! I love receiving input from you guys. Also, Thank you for 250 Followers!!!!! I'm so blessed!! I love you guysss!!!!

[everlastlady]

Mammon + Servant Reader (Female)

✘Posted: 11/4/2023

✘Story Contains: Fem reader, Reader is a maid, Bubble baths, Gentle Mammon, Slight Nudity, Favoritism, & Feel good times.

✘Word Count: None, writing this on mobile y'all

✘Author's Note: Decided to do Mammon with female reader, I'll do a male reader soon. Just decided to cater to my female readers but I promise I will cater to my male readers. Remember to eat a meal or a snack, drink some water, get some fresh air, take your medicine, and remember that you are loved. If you loved this story remember to comment, click or tap that heart button, reblog with tags, and blaze if you can. Always remember to support your local writers. ♡♡♡

✘Summary: {Name} is a simple maid for the greed lord Mammon. {Name} isn't sure why Mammon always calls on her and always wants him by his side when he wanders his home. But she doesn't mind because she finds her master funny and enjoys how gentle he is with her. But what happens when {Name} gets sick? And it's time for Mammon to take care of them.

" It's okay sir, I'm sure that you will fine someone better than Fizzarolli. " She spoke softly to her boss Mammon who sat in the large green chair. As the imp news woman spoke about what happened at the show. The maid named (name), picked up the remote and pointed it at the large screen and turned it off. Once it flickered to black. She looked over at Mammon who was still fumming over what happened at the clown pageant. " I don't understand, I gave him everything! " Mammon's voice deep and demonic as he slammed his fist onto the table, sending a large crack through it. (Name) smacked her lips. She would have to get that fixed. " sometimes, you can give someone everything and they will still leave, I understand that you are frustrated sir but don't let this stop you from making money; I'm sure someone new will come along, what about the Glam Sisters? " (Name) walked over to Mammon's liquor cabinet. " Comas, after a piece of the set fell on them, they both ended up in the hospital in comas, besides they don't really fit the image of what I'm looking for. " Mammon muttered. (Name) noodded her head and set down the glass of liquor for Mammon. The greed demon looked up at (Name) and smiled. " Thanks, I know I always say this but you are my favorite maid, far better than the rest! You always do your job right and know how to keep a smile on my mug. " Mammon chuckled and took a drink. " Come drink with me, (Name) " Mammon grinned looking up at the maid. Her soft (E/C) looked at Mammon before shaking her head. " No, thank you, sir, I still have work to do; it's not good for one to be drunk on the job. You can cause a lot of mishaps that way putting others in harm and yourself. " (Name) said with a darling smile.

" See that is why you're my favorite (Name)! So smart and responsible with your duties. Maybe next time on one of your vacation days, you and me can drink together. " Mammon said. He would actually love to have a drink with (Name). And you wouldn't have to wear that plain maid outfit. Mammon wondered what (Name) would look like in different outfits. What dresses would (Name) wear or outfits that weren't dress related. Mammon never really seen (Name) outside work. He knew that she lived in the Pride ring and had an apartment. That's all he really knew about (Name's) life since she barely sooke about herself, she listened more than she speaks. " So (Name) how the payments on your apartment? Going because I've been thinking about giving you more payment, maybe you could buy yourself a nice house. " Mammon smirked. " It's going well, besides my loud and annoying neighbor. It's been good but I don't think I need a bigger payment. " (Name) said while tucking a piece of her hair behind her pointed ears. " Aww, come on; yes you do because you are responsible and work hard so tonight expect me to send you a shit ton of money. Now run around and tell the cook to prepare dinner. " Mammon waved his hand to dismiss (Name).

She smiled and bowed, walking out of Mammon's office. Mammon stood up and stared at the spot that (Name) stood in. " Lord of greed giving out money, I must be crazy... " Mammon looked away. " She better get a nice house with that money, a beautiful one at best. " Mammon sat back down. But there was no time to think about (Name) because Mammon had to find a replacement for Mammon so he would probably have to hold another clown off. His little fucked up beauty pageant, but hey if it helps him find Fizzarolli's replacement. Then he would be glad to hold one again. Especially have Fizzarolli and Asmodeus banned from it even that little imp with the gun that had showed up. When night time had finally coated the sky. Mammon sat in the dining room. The table decorated with food. (Name) stood next to Mammon holding a bottle of the greed demon's favorite wine. " (Name) how about you sit down and eat with me. " Mammon took the bottle wine and set it on the table. " And that's an order, just in case you try to come up with some excuse. " Mammon gestures towards the chair at the end of table. " Hey cook! Bring out plate for (Name)! " Mammon yelled. (Name) walked over and sat down - with a smile, the chef brought out a plate that had lemon pepper chicken, mashed potatoes covered in gravy, pasta,and vegetables that were just steamed. The night went well, Mammon made (Name) laugh with his jokes and stories. She listened to her master's rants and ideas.

Mammon enjoyed seeing (Name) laughed. The way her giggles slipped off her lips and coated his ears like honey. How her shoulders moved when she laugh, even that snort was adorable. Mammon felt hot in the face. He couldn't believe that she had made him feel this way for such a long time. But he never acted on these feelings because he was busy making money. But he always made sure that no one tried to get at (Name) which is why so many servants were fired for trying to hit on her. After dinner was done, (Name) stood up and bowed. " I'm grateful that you invited me to join you for dinner, sir, everything was delicious and I appreciated our conversation and the jokes you told. " (Name) spoke through a fit of giggles on the last part still remembering Mammon's joke about clown fish. " No problem, I also enjoyed eating with you. Way better than those dinners I have to attend with Lucifer and the other sins. " Mammon stood up smiling but he stopped noticing how (Name) wobble a bit when standing straight up. Did she drink to much wine? No that couldn't be because she had to drive home. " (Name)? " Mammon walked over to (Name) . " You okay mate? " Mammon reached out. Before she could respond she threw up on yourself and the carpet, (Name) would have fallen and hit the floor but Mammon caught her before she could pass out.

" (Name)! " He called her name and held you close not caring if he got her vomit on him. (Name's) eyes flickered opened as she coughed. " I don't feel good... " Her voice sounded dry and low. " Y-You are going home, let's go get you cleaned up. " Mammon picked up (Name), poor girl could barely speak it hurt to speak so she wouldn't fight back with Mammon who brought her into a guest bedroom. (Name) always took care of him, he will now take care of her. Mammon managed to grab a large shirt that had his logo on it. (Name) could sleep in that and get out of that disgusting maid outfit that was covered in vomit. Mammon ran (Name) a bath. He made sure the water wasn't too hot or cold. He added in some bath salts and oils. Mammon turned towards (Name) trying to figure out how to not make this sound creepy. " (Name) take off that outfit and get into the tub, we gotta get you washed up mate, this bath will help a little. " Mammon offered his hand. (Name) nodded weakly and took his hand, stepping into the bathroom. Mammon turned around as (Name) peeled away her clothing and stepped into the tub - it smelled like mint and honey. She let out a relaxing sigh. Mammon turned around and got on his knees as he began to wash her up. " You don't have to do that sir. " (Name) said in a tires voice. " Shh, yes I do, you always take care of me, so for the night just let me take care of you please. " Mammon said while washing up (Name).

She nodded her head as her boss Mammon washes her up. Avoiding her chest area and crotch area. She held onto the tub when Mammon lifted her leg to wash it. This felt nice, so she enjoyed herself. Mammon took a cup of water and poured it over (Name's) head as he washed her hair and face. He would let her handle the rest while he went to go get her towels and medicine. He could have gotten servant to do this but no, he wanted to take care of (Name), Mammon returned and helped (Name) out of the tub. She dried off and slipped into the large dark green shirt that Mammon gave her. It had his logo on it. " Sorry that I couldn't get you any undergarments. " Mammon said with a crimson blush. " It's fine, I usually sleep without them more comfortable that way. You feel less trapped. " (Name) said while taking the medicine that Mammon brought her. She crawled into the bed as Mammon placed his hand on her head. " Your fever is going down a little. " Mammon said with his hand placed on (Name's) head. " I'm going to stay by your side so scooch over. " Mammon moved over before getting into the bed with you. He laid next to you and stared at you. " You look cute in my merch. " He said. (Name's) voice was still a little dry but still did her voice to talk. " Thanks, the material feels soft. " She said while playing with the blanket.

Mammon turned his side to look at (Name) who did the same to look at Mammon. " Sir... " (Name) began to speak again. " Call me, Mammon. " Mammon said running his fingers through her hair. " Mammon thank you for taking care of me, I'm also sorry that I ruined the carpet. " She looked down. " It's fine, I can get it clean; besides I've been wanting to replace that carpet with a new one. Taking care of you is something you deserve, you always take care of me, so I decided to take care of you... I don't know your my favorite and I like you. " Mammon he hoped that saying that didn't make things awkward between (Name) and him. " I like you too. " (Name) smiled tiredness filled with their eyes. She rested her head on Mammon's chest, while he continued to play with her hair, but soon he leaned down and kissed her. (Name) pulled away quickly. " Mammon, you'll get sick! " She had worry in her voice. " I don't care, I will be fine. " Mammon went back to kissing (Name) who soon melted into the kiss. She enjoyed this moment between her and Mammon. This was no longer just a maid and her master. But just two people who love each other and care for each other. Who take care of each, who soon will have a future together.

Mammon's Clowns aka Mammon Tag List:

If you want to be added to the Mammon Tag List Let Me Know.

[frvnkcastles]

WAITING FOR THE LIGHT ➵ F. CASTLE

Summary: After a tense argument, you get triggered and Frank is there to pick up the pieces.

Warnings: Past abuse (Frank does not hurt the reader), implied PTSD, feminine nicknames, cursing, hurt/comfort

Word count: 1.5k

Author’s note: This was also a request — I promise I’m gonna try my best to start replying to asks with the corresponding fics! I'm still very much figuring this whole thing out. Stay safe lovelies <3 (Also by now you may have figured out I’m out here naming after FOB lyrics, hehe.)

He would never hurt you. He wouldn’t. Ever. You knew that — and yet, all reason and logic flew out the window just like that as soon as he raised his hand in retaliation.

You couldn’t even remember what you were arguing about, your mind only locked in on that one moment that made your heart hammer in your chest and any words drain from your throat. He had been heading out the front door of your apartment and you reached for his arm, only for him to pull it away and lift his hand, in the process. That was all. Just... moving away from you.

And you still flinched. As soon as he turned to you with his hand up in the air, you flinched. He saw it, saw the panic flash by your eyes, saw the way your throat closed up on you and saw how you took a step back in blind fear. Within seconds, whatever had been building the frustration in his chest evaporated and the heavy bag carrying his guns fell onto the floor with a thud that only startled you further.

”Baby...”, he breathed out, tilting his head to the side while reaching for you with both hands, only for you to react by stepping back and forcing a quick smile onto your lips.

”It’s okay”, you uttered out, running your fingers through your hair and nodding to confirm your own words as you trailed away from him. ”I’ll—I just—I’m gonna... the—the bathroom”, you stammered before turning your eyes away from him, unwilling to face the stare aimed at you as you headed down the hall to hide in your bathroom.

As you disappeared behind the door that was firmly sealed and then locked, Frank couldn’t help but take in a heavy breath and bury his face in his hands. The urge to kick something was almost irresistible, but aware that it would only scare you further, he settled for pacing back and forth and grumbling into his palm.

Whoever had caused you to react like that, was going to fucking suffer. You had always been the one person to look at Frank without fear, and here you were now, hiding from him behind locked doors. He could hear your suffocated cries, too, and it broke his heart in two — how could he do that to you? How could anyone have done that to you?

He struggled to suppress his anger at himself and anyone else who had made you cry, but eventually, he exhaled and stepped over to the bathroom with a gentle knock. ”Sweetheart”, he began, only to realize he had no clue what the fuck to say. There was no excuse or defense, after all. ”Hey, I get if you don’t wanna see me. But tell me you’re alright, yeah?” he pleaded, the despair evident even in his rough voice as he leaned his forehead against the door and squeezed his eyes shut. He felt sick to his stomach.

He heard your sob through the door, and when you unlocked it, he didn’t hesitate to carefully open it and peer in, only to find you lurched over the sink with your head in your hands. You were shaking and your breaths were far too shallow to his liking, and for a split second, right before his instincts kicked in, he felt awfully helpless and unsure what to do.

”Sweetheart…”, he frowned, ”hey, can I touch you? That okay?” His hands reached for you gently, and with a desperate nod, you swiveled towards him and fell against his chest. He cradled you in a tender embrace, one that you wanted badly to wash away all the raw memories of unwanted, hurtful touches. Frank… he would never hurt you.

”It’s okay, baby. Take your time, aight?” he whispered, his gravelly voice grounding you as he rubbed soothing circles on your back. He didn’t waver, not once, the thought of this being too much never crossing his mind. He was going to stand by you through everything — he had decided on that very early on, and his mind could not be changed.

You hiccuped, and damn-near hyperventilating, you clung onto Frank’s shirt like it was your lifeline. ”I’m—I just— I thought…”, you sobbed, and closing his eyes, Frank nodded.

”Shh, sh, shh, I know. I know, darlin’. C’mon, try and take some deep breaths for me, yeah?” he tried quietly and solemnly, and managing a frantic nod against his chest, you followed his example and drew in longer breaths, calming down your panicked state with each inhale.

”C’mere. Let’s get ya outta this hot bathroom. We’ll sit down on the couch, huh? That sound good, baby?” he suggested, talking you through everything, gentle and careful as he began guiding you into the living room. Still sniffling, you let him lead and wiped your eyes, a surge of embarrassment rearing its head in your chest as you sat down on the couch.

”I’m sorry”, was the first coherent thing you managed to speak, your shaky hands fiddling with the sleeves of your shirt as you avoided Frank’s gaze on you. ”I’m really… really sorry”, you added, lifting an ashamed hand to your face as you sighed.

Immediately, Frank was reacting with a mixture of a scoff and a snort — one that you had no time to overthink when he was speaking up.

”You got nothin’ to be sorry about, sweetheart. That wasn’t your fault. Ever. You got that?” he pressed with demanding words but his tone was genuinely soft and concerned for you. He didn’t want you to dwell in unfair guilt or worry, and he needed you to know that. ”I was an asshole”, he continued, before taking in a weak breath and looking down at his fingers. ”But I would never, ever touch you in any way you don’t want to me. I’d never hurt you. I know I’m—I’m a scary guy, yeah? But you never have to be scared of me”, he went on, desperate for you to trust him again.

Quietly, you nodded in understanding, not sure what to say. You believed him, of course, yet words failed you and, in doing so, left Frank fearing the worst.

”Are you?” he whispered weakly. ”Scared of me?”

At that, you looked up at him with widening eyes, your hand automatically leaping to his in a way that made a weight roll off of his chest. At least you still didn’t mind touching him. ”No”, you promised with a shake of your head. ”I was just... startled. But I know. I know you wouldn’t, I do”, you sighed, and with the need to console you somehow, Frank tenderly swiped his finger across the back of your hand to caress the smooth skin there.

”Has that, uh... has that happened before?” he asked lowly, his eyes trained on where your fingertips rested across his, unsure if he’d be able to handle your answer. You could hear it in his voice — the strain, the unwillingness to know mixed in with the insistency on hearing all about it.

Swallowing, you nodded. ”Yeah”, you whispered, not elaborating further but it was enough for Frank to pinch his nose and breathe out with anger.

”Jesus”, he muttered, his heart pounding in his chest and his trigger finger itching — and yet, he gulped it all down and gave you a careful glance. ”I appreciate you tellin’ me. As much as you want to talk about it... I won’t leave your side or judge you, ever”, he vowed, and wiping a tear from your eye at his kind, protective nature, you smiled at him.

”I wish I had met you earlier”, you laughed dryly, not really amused but certainly grateful for this man by your side. ”I’m really lucky to have you now”, you added with your eyes watering up, and with his stomach lurching at your fragile voice, he inched over to you on the couch to press a kiss onto your temple.

”And as long as you want me, I’mma be right here”, he swore.

It seemed almost funny, now — it had been a complete misunderstanding, and certainly, whatever you had been arguing about had been completely forgotten about by now.

”Is there anythin’ else I should know? I don’t ever wanna make you… y’know. That was pretty hard to watch”, Frank swallowed, clearly remorseful, and it made you feel guilty, too.

”I, uh, I don’t really react well if someone raises their voice at me”, you explained quietly, and listening attentively, Frank nodded. ”Arguments happen, I get that. It’s not me trying to get out of it. I just… hope we can have an adult conversation instead of screaming at each other”, you continued, and Frank reacted with his hand coming over yours.

”Hey, shit, that’s more than fair. You got it, darlin’. I’ll, uh, I’ll try my best to make sure we don’t fight, period. But if it comes to that, if I’m outta line, you tell me, okay?” he insisted, and with a weak smile, you squeezed his hand.

”Thank you for being so understanding”, you whispered, and with a sad chuckle, Frank scooted closer to kiss your temple.

”You deserve nothin’ less, sweet darlin’.”

[lanas-delight]

the one that got away.

♫ rec: when i was your man by bruno mars

✰ an enhypen scenario || word count: around 2k, w/ fem-presenting!reader, heeseung, & sunghoon

✰ description — years after an anniversary dinner gone wrong, heeseung finds himself singing at your wedding as a favor to you and your new husband, even if that meant he’d have to bury his feelings and his regrets from the past.

✰ warnings — angst. literally just a lot of angst.

✰ note — inspired by the off my face cover by heeseung (and A LOT of kdramas....). 🤍 enjoy !

(why didnt i change the warnings good god IGNORE THE OG WARNINGS ITS FIXED NOW I FORGOT TO CHANGE IT WHEN I COPIED THIS FORMAT FROM MY OTHER DRAFT OMLLL)

The sun had fallen in the early evening. The sky was dark, though plastered with stars. It was a day in mid-July, a clear day after a week's worth of rainy days, and the air felt so clear, the breeze so warm but soft. It was a day that would begin your new life, and relive in your memories every day for the rest of your life. You knew that too well.

In a white tent surrounded by a meadow of sunflowers, lights all around, lighting up the grounds as the wedding march echoed from the grand piano, everyone was standing, watching as you, the bride, walked down the aisle, hooked arms with another’s arm, as you approached your fiancé, soon-to-be husband, Sunghoon. His furrowed brows raised at the sight, you in a beautiful white dress, lace at every edge of the dress, your hands delicately shown off bare, your ring finger empty only for a few more moments. Sunghoon gazed at you, admired every piece of you, curving his lips into a smile. A whisper, “You’re so beautiful, Y/N,” comes from his mouth for only you to hear. Your cheeks heated up, just like they did on your first date, when he said a cheesy pick up line to make you laugh, which it did, but you felt your cheeks heat up, like you were blushing, too. He noticed it quick.

The priest started to speak, everyone took their seats once again. It went quiet, only the soft echo of crickets in the far distance behind the strong voice of the priest’s. He goes on to welcome the guests and start the speech to where Y/N and Sunghoon would repeat his words and then kiss to confirm their marriage to one another. They had said their vows privately that morning, backs facing each other on a wide bench by the water. It was beautiful, and it respected the tradition of not seeing each other before the wedding. It was your idea, and Sunghoon tried his best to not sneak a glance but he knew you looked so beautiful.

You had this day planned out since you were six, the first time you took one of the pillow sheets and put it on your head like a veil, prancing around the house like a happy bride. You picked out your ideal dress through boredom on a late night in middle school, chose what your bouquet would like in after a trip to a community garden. You had met the most perfect man, had the perfect life, your perfect wedding, but there was something missing.

In the crowd, in the middle of the third row on the left side, sat Heeseung, his hands knotted together in his lap as he watched you kiss him. His face was pale, his eyes wide but inside, he felt his heart shatter and all the little pieces fell to his stomach. There was a part of him that knew he had no reason to feel this way, but he couldn’t help it.

He wasn’t supposed to be there. He only went because you asked, as a favor. He was a singer, a very good one, and the original singer you had hired came down with the flu last minute so you called him in a panic as a last resort. He said yes, which surprised you, but you were thankful. You gave him a list of songs that the original singer had made for their performance, and Heeseung told you he’d be there and that was the end of it. Now, at the wedding, you had forgotten he was to attend at all. You felt his stare, amongst the other eyes glued to you from all around the room, but his was distant, yet it tore you apart little by little.

After the kiss, everyone rose from their seats and clapped, cheering for you and Sunghoon, except Heeseung. He didn’t stand with the others, but once he did, he turned and scooted through the other people in the row so he could get ready for his performance at the reception.

If he was asked about how he felt, not that he ever would be, but if he was, he would say that it took everything in him to stay for the reception and to sing in front of everyone—old friends, some faces he didn’t recognize, and the family he was supposed to be apart of. It was his fault, everyone in that room knew it, claiming more than Heeseung did, but that wasn’t true. He relives his nightmare everyday, seeing you with another man, happier without him.

You and Sunghoon had gone off to change into more comfortable, though still formal outfits, with Sunghoon wearing a lighter colored suit, a loose tie and one open button at the top. Meanwhile, you looked like a diamond, white dress that fell to just above your knees, maybe of silk and satin, oh it looked wonderful on you. It was the dress Heeseung had picked out for you years ago, but you had forgotten that. It was now the dress that you and Sunghoon would have your first dance in. Nothing Heeseung ever did for you mattered anymore, maybe it never once did.

Everyone had taken their seats at their tables, drinking champagne and waiting for the speeches to start. Heeseung sat at the stage, his face low to keep hopefully no attention on him whatsoever. You and Sunghoon sat at this long table, with the maid of honor, best man, and the bridesmaids and groomsmen all on either side of them. The best man started first with his speech, his name was something with a “J,” an English name, but his accent was no American. He was apparently dating the maid of honor—who started her speech directly after the best man’s—which made Heeseung smile a bit because he had met the maid of honor plenty of times before, when he was with you. She used to be voluntarily lonely, never wanting to date because she could never find the one. But it seemed she did. They have a son, last he heard. He was happy for her, even though he knew that she hated him for everything that happened with you.

Sunghoon’s speech was next, and it was absolutely beautiful. Poetic, if you will. He spoke nothing but beauty and love of you, every word a new meaning for you, describing every perfect you behold. It made Heeseung want to fall apart right at the spot. He promised himself he wouldn’t let himself fall down this hole again, that he’d move on and fall out of love with you, but that could never happen. He was stuck on you. There wasn’t a single reason to him that made him not love you, or even consider the possibility of not loving you. You were his moon, his star, his every part of him, but you didn’t love him. You haven’t loved him for a long time. You weren't his, and he wasn't yours.

Then, it was time. Sunghoon and you walked to the middle of the dance floor, holding each other’s hands and preparing to dance as Heeseung stood up and approached the microphone stand. He glanced back at the pianist behind him who nodded at him before starting to play the song, Off My Face by Justin Bieber. Their song. But it wasn’t theirs anymore. He was sure that it never was.

Heeseung clears his throat quietly as he turns back to the microphone, one hand wrapped around it while the other fell to the stand, holding it gently, space between his palm and the pole. He starts to sing, every note and every line perfectly harmonized as the couple danced together.

Everyone watched the couple quietly, with eyes of admiration and small smiles, but only one ever looked at you and it was you. Sunghoon’s back faced Heeseung for a few moments as you and him swayed together, and that was when, just between the chorus and the verse, you had met eyes with the boy you once loved, the one singing at your wedding to another man.

Once the song was over, Heeseung stepped back to take a drink out of his water just as everyone else joined in on the dancer floor for another song, one more upbeat than the slow, love song he had just sung for the couple’s first dance. He sang another song, then another, and a couple more before his set was done and he grabbed his stuff and headed out of the reception tent. He headed to the parking lot just a hundred feet away but just before he made it there, his name was called and his heart stopped for a second. It was you.

“Heeseung, wait,” you caught up to him, holding your heels in your hands so you wouldn’t break them or twist your ankles trying to catch him before he left. “You’re leaving?”

Heeseung quickly looked over to the tents then back to you. “Yeah, I, uh, finished my set.”

You reached your hand out to him, “No, you should stay. Enjoy it,” you gave him a smile, “Might be the only wedding you’ll attend,” it was a harmless joke, but Heeseung took it differently.

“Are you saying I won’t get married?” His voice sounded hurt, but stern at the same time. He was trying to stand his ground, while dying on the inside.

“What? No, I— I was joking,” You lowered your hand, “What’s wrong?”

But Heeseung raised his eyebrows. “What’s wrong?” He scoffed, “You asked me to sing at your wedding, of all things, of all people, you asked me to come here and relive everything that happened.”

You were confused, “Relive? You mean I would have to relive it? You broke my heart, Heeseung. You were never going to marry me. We had no future—”

“Did I say that?”

“Say what?”

“Did I say I would never marry you?” Heeseung repeated, “Did I ever say we had no future?”

You stepped back, “Well no but you never did anything that proved otherwise.”

But Heeseung shook his head and rubbed his face, trying to stay calm as you continued on.

“You never told me you would marry me, you never even asked about our future or even talked about it. You and I were together for three years and there was nothing you did that gave me any hope at all for us.”

Heeseung clicked his tongue, pushing his hair back, “God, Y/N, are you really that oblivious?”

You furrowed your brows, “What?”

“I was going to propose to you that night.”

Seven years ago, you and Heeseung met at your work—a cafe at the time—because that morning, he was craving a frappe and he knew that the cafe you just so happen to work at made the best coffee. You were his barista, and he fell in love with you the moment he saw you. He left his number on a napkin and you waited a day to call because you didn’t want to seem desperate, but also that you didn’t want to see him again either. On the first date, so memorable, you read out your favorite quotes from your favorite books, which he asked for because he knew you liked to read. Over a handful of dates and a million talks, you and him fell for each other—hard. He was all who you wanted, for three years, he was the boy you wanted to marry. He was your endgame, or you wanted him to be it.

For your three year anniversary dinner, he had made a reservation at your favorite restaurant, bought your favorite flowers, and dressed in your favorite suit of his. You wore his favorite dress, a white, short dress that fell just above your knees. You two headed to the restaurant around six, seated around six-thirty. It was good at first, he opened the car door for you, held the restaurant’s door open for you, pulled the seat back and pushed it in for you. He did what he always did. But for months, you wished for more. You had been wanting to hint for him to do something more, to take the next step in the relationship, but it was never the right time to talk about it. But instead, you dropped hints. For a year now, every day, you’ve dropped some kind of hint, and only realized that morning that it had been a year, and there was nothing. No conversations about the future, not even a poke at it. Nothing. You had enough.

During appetizers, you broke the silence, which was only there because he was eating and you were sipping on your wine, with a simple, but cold statement—“I don’t think this is going anywhere.”

Heeseung, confused and taken aback, almost spit out his food. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about us, Hee. You’ve done the same thing over and over again, for the last three years, and you’ve never even given the thought of asking me to marry you.”

“Y/N—”

“And I’ve dropped hints, every single day since our two year anniversary—a year of this cycle, I can’t,” You shook your head, “I had your mother talk with you about proposing, I had your brother talk to you endlessly about his own wife. God, I even had a fake email about wedding rings sent to you by my friends so you’d finally ask me!” You abruptly stood up from your seat, everyone in the room was staring at you and him. You sighed. “I can’t wait around anymore for you.”

Heeseung stared at you, tears slowly forming in his eyes, those bambi eyes of his, “Y/N . . .”

You shook your head, “It’s over, Heeseung.” And you grabbed your coat and left the restaurant. He sat there, completely still. Everyone stared for another few moments out of pity before turning back to their own dinners. Heeseung slowly took out the box from his pocket and set it on the table, opening it and looking at the ring he had bought months ago, waiting for this exact day to propose to you and to make you his bride. But he was too late. He was just a day too late.

“I took you to your favorite restaurant, asked you to wear my favorite dress—which you’re wearing for him tonight, ironic enough!—and I wore your favorite suit. I took you there and I ordered your favorite foods, your wine, everything. I had it all planned out. I was going to tell you how much I loved you after we ate the appetizers,” Heeseung declared to you then, a choking sob in his throat, “I was going to propose to you minutes after you decided we were over. I noticed every hint and I planned it all, from the beginning. But I was too late. Right?”

You had started to cry, “Heeseung . . .”

He shook his head, “I have never stopped loving you, since the day I met you. Not even when you ruined me, when I cried for months on end, for the humiliation, the heartache, I have never stopped loving you. Until tonight,” he turned, "Goodnight, Y/N."

“No, Heeseung, please,” you went towards him, grabbing his arm, “Please,” implying you wanted a second chance, just a few yards from your newly wedded husband. Heeseung knew he didn't love you anymore. Tonight was his closure. The regret, the miserableness, the mourning of what could've been—it was finally over.

“You remember that quote you told me? On our first date?” Heeseung stared at you, coldly, “Maybe if you were the moon, I could’ve loved you the same,” he then scoffed, “It had always been about us, huh?”

You shook your head, “Hee, please—”

“No, Y/N.” Heeseung took his arm out of your grasp, stepping back from you, “Congrats on your marriage,” and he walked away from you, leaving you to fall to your knees on the grass, crying to yourself as he got into his car and left. You got up a few moments later and returned to the wedding.

You never told Sunghoon what happened, claimed you fell on the way back to the tents after you had gone out to thank Heeseung for coming since he was leaving so abruptly, and Sunghoon, being the kind person he was, didn't question any of it. He helped you get cleaned up and danced with you until it was time to head off to your honeymoon. But Heeseung never left your mind.

Months went by, then years, and Sunghoon never knew what you had done that night, begging Heeseung for another chance, that you would've thrown everything you had for the boy you broke. He never knew.

On the night of Christmas Eve, the one following your eleventh wedding anniversary, the kids were asleep in their rooms while you and Sunghoon put out the presents from "Santa." One girl, and two boys. You didn't think you'd want kids, let alone three of them, but you loved and cherished your kids entirely. Your oldest was ten, middle was seven, and the youngest was three. You had gotten them toys, clothes, etc., but that didn't matter. It was when you seemed off, like you did every Christmas, every Thanksgiving, every holiday. Sunghoon finally asked about it, and that's when you told him.

You told him about Heeseung, what he said to you, how you feel about him, and the absolute and miserable regret you had for letting him go. Sunghoon didn't say anything for a while. He just stared at you blankly, not sure how to respond or react, so he didn't. He just sat down on the couch and covered his face with his hands. You tried to sit with him but he scooted away before turning to you, telling you that he should've known. You reassured you loved him now, but that wasn't enough. You both knew it wasn't enough.

Divorce followed shortly after, joint custody where the kids will spend every other week with either parent. Sunghoon was cordial about it all, which was good for you, you guessed, but you didn't want a divorce. You loved Sunghoon, but not the way you should've all these years. He deserved better, and you wish you could've gave him what he deserved, but at the end of the day, you didn't love him. You loved Heeseung.

You searched Heeseung up the moment it came to mind, thinking you could go back to him as your last resort—just like before—but to your unfortunate surprise, Heeseung was married. On the night of your wedding, Heeseung drove to the bar to straighten out his thoughts over a few drinks. There, he met his future wife who sat beside him and actually bought him a drink because he was looking at her a lot but not actually making a move. They married the next year, and have a son around your oldest's age. He looks at her the way he used to look at you. He didn't love you, and hadn't for a long time. You lost him, and that was never going to change. There was nothing you could do to get him back, to make things right, to fix your marriage, your family, to get closure. Alone, you were, but you sought out to get better.

You started therapy, and eventually, convinced Sunghoon to go to couple's counseling with you. A year or so passed, you and Sunghoon decided to give it another try. You wanted that happy ending, and you worked for it. You loved Sunghoon, more than ever, never to lose that love, because he was your husband, the love of your life, the father of your children. Sunghoon was who you wanted to love for eternity, not Heeseung. You didn't love him anymore. You finally moved on, just as he had.

Because he wasn't yours, and you weren't his.

end.

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a/n—i'm gonna be completely honest.. i was watching a lot of kdramas when i thought of this shit, but i hope you guys enjoyed it anyways! thank you for reading <33