#white cake recipe with oil

[thickest-slimiest-malware]

i made a cake themed after the dance scene in revolutionary girl utena!!!

[crim50n-r8er-reblogs]

Castella Cake from 1980

“…which answers the question of who came first?”

“Normally the guy.”

[nialltlynch]

my ugly little orange cream cake 🥳

[vaspider]

If you have celiac or otherwise can't eat wheat, btw, and you like bread, I highly recommend investing in a breadmaker. Even the best store-bought gluten-free bread does not hold a candle to the stuff that comes out of our breadmaker, and it's cheaper per slice even when we buy bread mix in single-loaf bags.

This is our breadmaker. Evie got it on sale, but it is an investment. I'm not going to pretend it isn't a chunk of change up front. There are cheaper ones, but the reason I like this one and think it's worth the money:

It has two smaller paddles, where our older bread maker that my mom got us and got destroyed by getting construction dust in it had one big paddle in the middle. This leaves a big hole in the middle of the finished loaf, which makes the bread much less useful for, like, sandwiches.

Zojirushi is not as well-known a brand in the US, but it's a Brand Name in Japan for good reason. Evie's had our Zojirushi rice cooker for over a decade & we had to replace the inner bowl once bc someone used metal utensils in it and scratched the non-stick coating. We expect to use this machine for at least a decade.

You can program your own cycles, which we found really useful. Evie built a custom cycle that removed the punch-down sections (gluten-free bread tends not to rise as much) and that made our perfect loaf.

A lot of bread machines produce very tall, square loaves, which are awkward to slice, store, and make sandwiches with. This produces loaves that make good sandwiches and toast, and the French toast slices don't crowd the pan.

The top heating element on this gives a really amazingly browned top crust that we definitely didn't get on our old machine.

It's so pretty.

So how is it cheaper in the long run if the machine costs $300+? A little like this:

We use Pamela's Bread Mix bc it's really consistent and easy - you need the bread mix, water, yeast, 3 egg whites, and oil. (We use avocado oil and find it best and most consistent, but regular vegetable oil works!) We buy Pamela's in bulk, and without any subscription discounts or whatever, the $48 pack of 3 bags makes about 11.5 loaves. With the cost of yeast and eggs and stuff, it ends up costing about $4.50 a loaf. (If you buy your yeast in larger bags & store it in an airtight container, you can create less waste and it's also cheaper.)

By comparison, a loaf of Franz GF Bread costs $7-8, and Canyon Bakehouse usually runs about the same.

However, that's not an apples to apples comparison because the Franz loaf is an 18 oz. loaf, whereas our breadmaker makes a 2 lb. loaf. Assuming even the lower-end cost for getting a Franz loaf at the store, an equivalent amount of bread would cost $12.42, and it's not nearly as good.

(Yes, gluten-free bread is fucking expensive. That's part of why I'm writing this post in the first place.)

Anyway, assuming you eat 2 lbs. of bread a week in your house - a breadmaker loaf, basically, to make the math simple - you'll end up spending $7.92 less on bread every week. That means that even at the most expensive cost for the Zojirushi, if you buy it at its highest price (don't do that! wait for a sale!) it'll take 50 weeks - about a year - before the breadmaker pays for itself. If you manage to get it on a 25% off sale (which we did), it pays for itself in about 9 months.

Nine months, I must stress, in which you are eating much more delicious bread.

We tend to go through a couple of loaves a week because toast, sandwiches, and melts are great food for people with low spoons.

Evie and I perfected the Pamela's mix recipe for this particular machine - I'll get it typed up when I'm downstairs next, along with the quasi-babka recipe. (Really, it's like a marble cake and babka and bread had a baby, and it's a family favorite.)

Bread good. The end.

[stardust-swan]

Everyday Ways I Honour Aphrodite

(NSFW warning)

🌹Roses, roses, roses. Rose soap, rose lip balm, rose hand cream, rose lotion, rose perfume, rose oil on my pillow before falling asleep, rose candles, rose incense, roses in my garden, rosewater toner, rose face mist, rose shower gel, dried roses in the bath... Just roses everywhere you can fit them.

🌹Reading romantic books and poetry, watching romance films

🌹 Reading books and poetry about Aphrodite

🌹Making myself feel beautiful with pretty jewellery and makeup. Even just a swipe of tinted lip balm boosts my confidence (I use French Girl Rose Noir). I try to wear at least a little bit of makeup or jewellery daily, even if it's just a pair of studs or a subtle lipstick

🌹 Even if I'm just staying at home all day I'll spray perfume and put on jewellery and do lipstick just to feel sensual while I'm lounging around playing Animal Crossing (currently wearing a comfy embroidered nightie, small gold hoops, a pretty bracelet and a little bit of YSL Orange Perfecto lipstick as I write this)

🌹 Embracing my sensuality. Swaying my hips, feeling the softness of my body, dancing freely, engaging in self-pleasure, taking nudes, trying to unlearn the shame associated with sexuality from my upbringing. I don't watch porn often as I find most of it unhealthy and misogynistic (I only like this one random Japanese couple's channel and some vintage and Korean softcore), but I enjoy toys (my favourite is the rose), erotic literature, erotic film, audio porn (usually in other languages because I find a lot of dirty talk just makes me cringe but I still get enjoyment out of hearing little moans and silky low voices so I get that and avoid secondhand embarrassment from bad dirty talk by listening to it in languages I don't understand), and erotic fine art.

🌹 I try to get really comfortable when I'm engaged in self love. Lipstick and perfume on, hair styled, lingerie or nightie that makes me feel sexy, a candle lit or rose, ylang ylang and jasmine oil in my diffuser, soft music playing. Then I'll position myself comfortably, and stroke my thighs, tease my nipples, squeeze my breasts, lick my juices off my fingers and use it like a lipstick, painting my lips and nipples or using it to lightly lubricate my clitoris. Running my hands all over my belly, thighs and breasts, experimenting with different types of pressure and stimulation. Just luxuriating in the sensual feelings I can bring to my beautiful female body.

🌹 Wearing jewellery with seashells, pearls, emerald, ruby, bronze, copper, gold, jade, garnet and iridescent beads

🌹 Enjoying apples, honey, figs, pomegranates, strawberries, raspberries, olives, lettuce, rosewater and chocolate. I like buying Guylian chocolates as they're seashell shaped, but any chocolate will do (my favourite chocolate bar to buy is white chocolate with strawberries). I also like foods that you can taste the rosewater in like rose macarons and Turkish delight.

🌹 Making foods with ingredients she likes, like honey cakes, Persian rose love spell cookies, rosewater nougat, Persian love cake, baklava, cornes de gazelle, mhencha, etc... I mostly stick to Mediterranean, North African, Arab and Persian recipes, as they commonly use ingredients like rosewater, honey, pomegranates, and figs.

🌹 Carrying rose quartz in my pocket and keeping rose quartz under my pillow

🌹 I use a rose quartz roller to massage oil into my face

🌹 I keep a mini Venus de Milo statue and a swan trinket box on my bedside table

🌹 Drinking a drink made up of honey, cinnamon, milk and hot water at night to relax

🌹 Wearing pretty lingerie under my clothes, even if it's a basic outfit

🌹 I often fall asleep to the sound of ocean waves

🌹 Gold highlighter swept on my cheeks and body shimmer on my collarbones, reflecting light like sun rays on the ocean

🌹 Doing little offerings, like spritzing her statue with perfume, or offering up a portion of food I'm eating that I think she'd like

🌹 Lighting incense in scents like myrrh, frankincense, rose, vanilla, cinnamon, ginger and jasmine

🌹 Drawing myself relaxing baths with fragrant oils and salts

🌹 Reading hymns, Sappho's poetry, and listening to Athanati Afroditi

🌹 Listening to music that's romantic or sensual (this is my playlist)

🌹 Carrying a hand mirror and admiring myself as I check my makeup

🌹 Adding honey to tea

🌹 Writing letters and poetry about love and beauty

🌹Admiring women I find beautiful without jealousy or resentment, just appreciation

🌹Using these emojis: 🌹🦢🌊🪞🍎❤️💘💗💕💋🕊️🫒💄

🌹 Wearing pink, red, aqua, and seafoam green

🌹 Being consistent in self care. No matter how low my spoons are, unless I'm so dog-tired I end up falling asleep on the couch at 8pm, I force myself to do my evening skincare routine - cleansing, toning, eye cream, moisturiser, oil. And I always feel better for it even if I was exhausted before. Much smaller but I'm also consistent in oiling the ends of my hair daily and spraying perfume before bed. And I keep up with getting my hair done and brows waxed every three months without fail.

🌹 Doing exercises that make me feel sensual. I'm really lazy tbh but I push myself because I know Aphrodite would want me to take care of my body. I pick exercises that make me feel good and desirable, like yoga flow, belly dance, and exercises that target my womanly attributes.

🌹 Giving compliments!

🌹 Doing a big self care day every Friday (the day associated with her). Hot oil hair treatment, foot soak and exfoliation, removing old nail polish and buffing and filing nails, face mask, teeth whitening....

🌹 Going to the pond in winter and admiring the swans

🌹 Going to an art gallery in my city just to look at the painting Venus and Cupid (Day) by Fragonard

🌹 Sleeping on silk sheets as they feel sensual (they're also good for your hair and skin)

🌹 Making my own diffusers and cosmetics from natural, aphrodisiac products. Homemade bath salt with rose petals and pink salt, homemade lip mask with olive oil and rose oil, and adding oil of rose, jasmine, sandalwood, and cinnamon to a diffuser as I find these scents stimulating and sensual.

🌹 And of course, thanking Lady Aphrodite every day.

[azzayofchaos]

You said you wanted art requests, how about tango trying to bake something?? :D

Not me getting busy and then procrastinating this for a month and a half. O_O

oops.

Here’s the guy! I think he’s probably a good cook, and at least a decent baker, he’s been alive for far too long to have not figured it out. Unfortunately he’s partial to Nether food which doesn’t always sit well with his non-nether companions.

Probably not the image either of us would have thought of but it was interesting to draw at any rate. He’s making a ghast-jelly soufflés or something!

Some thoughts about food and the Nether? (You didn’t think you could escape my world building, did you?)

This particular dish I image to be a fluffy soufflé or mousse-like texture. It’s a relatively sweet dish, a rarity it the nether, though it could easily be modified for a more savory flavor.

The list of ingratiates might look something like this:

- The luminescent, warped-vine fruits that grow at high altitudes in the temperate zone. They are much smaller and more fragile than shroomlights, and are a rare source of sugar in the Neth. Most nether plants are savory, umami, or sour/biter,

— The viscous ichor from a ghast’s innards that whips up much like egg whites (there are eggs produced by some nether species but not ones well suited for this process)

— Aromatic herbs and spices that can be found in various biomes are a good addition especially when combined with the fruit juice to make a sauce. The specifics would vary from recipe to recipe, but the benefit of the dish is that it can easily be made with ingredients that don’t contain capsaicin which is present in many nether plants. (this dessert is considered one of the most palatable for overworlders as long as you can get past the use of ghast ichors.)

— some fat source, generally a hoglin lard or oil from stems.

— Salt! Readily available. It can often be found in large mineral deposits or salt flats in the rime zone or wastes.

Additionally, adding other ingredients can alter the sort of dish.

— The texture can be made more cake-like for example with the use of spore-flour, and hoglin or nut-based milks.

— Things like cacao, sugars, and fruit are coveted goods that the Neath has historically traded with the overworld for.

— I thought it would be interesting if there was a certain type of heat-resistant but heat-sensitive plant that curls/uncurls based on refined temperatures. It could be used as a thermometer!

[whimsigothwitch]

Mabon apple pie recipe

In celebration of Mabon next week, I am sharing my favorite apple pie recipe. I chose to share this a week in advance so that those who want to make it can prepare the ingredients. All ingredients can be plant-based, for those who are vegan the egg is not necessary (you may need to add a little more butter)

Witchy tips during baking:

Mix clockwise and say your intentions for the cake out loud, this could be "I welcome abundance into my life with open arms.", "I embrace the blessings of the harvest and celebrate the abundance it brings." or if you plan to share the pie with friends and family: "May this pie nurture the bonds of love and friendship among us."

When you sprinkle the spices into the cake, do this clockwise and say each correspondence out loud as you do this: Cinnamon: for love, and warmth Cardamom: for attraction and harmony Nutmeg: for prosperity and luck

Carve sigils of choice in the bottom of the pie before adding the filling.

Ingredients For the dough: 500 grams plain flour 1 sachet (15 grams) baking powder 150 grams of white caster sugar 50 grams of light brown caster sugar 150 grams of melted butter 1 egg Pinch of cinnamon, cardamom and nutmeg

For the filling: 1-1.5 kilos of apples 100 grams soaked and patted dry raisins (optional!) 1 tablespoon cinnamon (or more, until all apples are nicely coated)

To brush the dough before it goes into the oven: To give the cake a beautiful golden color, I recommend brushing the cake with 1 beaten egg OR a dash of milk of your choice before putting it in the oven.

Preheat the oven to 190 degrees celcius (374 F)

Peel and cut the apples into wedges, sprinkle with the cinnamon and the raisins that you have pre-soaked and patted dry.

Mix all the ingredients for the dough together until it becomes a crumbly dough (it should be able to stick together and not be too dry, if this is the case I recommend adding more butter to the dough!)

Grease a baking tin with butter or oil and line the bottom with baking paper.

Divide the prepared dough into 3 parts, and put 1 part over the bottom. Press this with your hands or a spoon with a little flour on it so that the dough does not stick.

Then take 1 more part of the divided dough and press it onto the edges around the baking tin. You can roll this out with a rolling pin and cut it to size, I think this takes too long so I just press the dough along the edges (about 0.5 cm thick)

Put the apple filling in the pie and spread it evenly.

Sprinkle the last remaining part of the made dough over the pie to get an apple crumble pie, if you want a lattice top: make a ball of the dough and roll it out with a rolling pin. Cut strips from the dough that are 1.5 cm wide and long enough to cover the pie. If you are making a lattice top, brush it with egg OR milk of your choice to give it a nice golden glow. If you have a crumb top this is not necessary.

Bake the pie for 40-50 minutes, but keep an eye on the pie because every oven is different! You know the pie is ready when you insert a toothpick or skewer into it and the apples can be pierced and the dough does not remain wet around the stick.

Let the pie cool down for fifteen minutes before removing it from the baking tin.

[najia-cooks]

[ID: Diamond-shaped cake slices arranged into a layered star shape, topped with powdered sugar, with dates and prunes placed around the edge of the plate. Two plates of Italian Christmas cookies are in the background. End ID]

Whole orange cake with sumac and pink peppercorn

This moist, flavorful cake is inspired by Sicilian torta all’arancia (orange cake) and Moroccan مَسْكُوتة‎ ("maskūta"). There is no peeling, zesting, or juicing of oranges required; oranges are added whole, and lend the citrus oils in their peels, the sweetness and flavor of their juice, and the tenderness of their pulp to the final cake.

Maskouta is a wheat-flour-based cake that often comes in orange or yoghurt varieties—this recipe combines both versions. The addition of yoghurt makes the cake incredibly tender, and adds a smooth tartness that perfectly balances the brightness, robustness, and slight bitterness of the citrus oils that infuse the cake. Cardamom and orange blossom water, both occasional additions in Moroccan orange cakes, add delicate aromatics that further round out the flavor of the cake; sumac and pink peppercorn add a sour, fizzling touch that draws the brightness of the orange to a head at the front of the palate.

Recipe under the cut!

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Ingredients:

2 whole organic oranges

1 3/4 cup (210g) flour

1 1/2 tsp sumac

3/4 tsp pink peppercorn

6 green cardamom pods

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp baking soda

1 tsp kosher salt

2 tsp orange blossom water

3 Tbsp olive oil

1/3 cup non-dairy yoghurt

1/2 cup non-dairy margarine, softened

1 cup vegetarian granulated sugar

Sicilian and Moroccan orange cakes do not usually include butter; however, I find that a creaming method, which incorporates air into a solid fat such as margarine, helps replace some of the leavening power of whipped eggs.

Instructions:

1. Scrub oranges thoroughly. Submerge them in cool water (weighing them down with a plate) and soak overnight.

This step removes some of the bitterness of the orange peels. If you don't have time for soaking, or if you very much dislike any amount of bitterness in sweets, zest the oranges by taking off just the orange layer of the peel with a microplane or vegetable peeler; set zest aside. Remove as much of the white pith as you can and discard. Use the zest and the peeled orange slices in place of the whole oranges.

2. Remove oranges from water. Blend them, along with orange blossom water, until homogenous. The mixture does not need to be completely liquid.

3. Toast cardamom pods and pink peppercorns in a dry skillet on medium heat until fragrant. Grind in a spice mill, or with a mortar and pestle. Combine dry ingredients (spices, flour, salt, baking powder, and baking soda) in a mixing bowl.

3. Cream margarine in a large mixing bowl with an electric hand mixer for 30 seconds, until fluffy. Add sugar and cream for 2 minutes, until aerated.

3. Gradually add pulverized oranges and fold in. Add olive oil and yoghurt and fold to combine.

4. Slowly add dry ingredients and gently fold until combined. You should get a fairly thick batter.

5. Prepare a 9" x 13" (about 22 x 33 cm) glass cake pan with oil or margarine. Pour in batter and flatten with a rubber spatula.

6. Bake in the bottom of an oven at 350 °F (175 °C) for 50 minutes, or until a toothpick entered into the center of the cake comes out clean.

7. Once cake has cooled, cut into slices and arrange as desired. Top with powdered sugar.

[mossy-mischief]

Gavin's Marble Chiffon Cake Recipe

My friends, I have a gift for you.

I found the exact Marble Chiffon Cake recipe Gavin and Freelancer make in this video and from the baking stream. It's from The Taste of Home Baking Book. If anyone makes it, let me know how it goes! I haven't tried yet.

(Recipe transcription below)

Marble Chiffon Cake

PREP: 15 min. + standing BAKE: 1 hour + cooling YIELD: 16 servings

CAKE:

7 eggs, separated

2 squares (1 ounce each) unsweetened chocolate

1-3/4 cups sugar, divided

1/4 cup hot water

2 cups all-purpose flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

3/4 cup water

1/2 cup vegetable oil

1 teaspoons vanilla extract

1/2 teaspoon cream of tartar

FROSTING:

4 squares (1 ounce each) semisweet chocolate

1 tablespoon butter

7 tablespoons heavy whipping cream

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar

Let eggs stand at room temperature for 30 minutes. In a small saucepan or microwave, melt unsweetened chocolate; stir until smooth. Add 1/4 cup sugar and hot water; mix well and set aside.

In a large mixing bowl, combine the flour, baking powder, salt, baking soda and remaining sugar. Whisk together the egg yolks, water, oil and vanilla; add to flour mixture and beat until moistened. Beat for 3 minutes on medium speed; set aside.

In another large mixing bowl and with clean beaters, beat egg whites and cream of tartar on high speed until stiff peaks form. Stir a fourth of egg whites into the batter, then fold in remaining whites. Divide batter in half; gradually fold chocolate mixture into one portion.

Alternately spoon the plain and chocolate batters into an ungreased 10-in. tube pan. Swirl with a knife. Bake on the lowest rack at 325° for 60-65 minutes or until top springs back when lightly touched. Immediately invert the cake; cool completely. Run a knife around sides and center tube of pan; remove cake to serving plate.

For frosting, melt semisweet chocolate and butter in a small saucepan or microwave; stir until smooth. Remove from the heat; stir in cream and vanilla. Whisk in confectioners' sugar until smooth. Immediately spoon over cake.

[discotitsposts]

soft smells

spencer reid x reader who loves cooking and baking cooking and baking with spencer.

fluff! rated e for everyone!

i keep seeing cooking and baking inspo on pinterest 😫

this is the recipe for bruschetta i used.

(i wanna be his housewife so bad it’s insane)

You hear the front door open as you’re taking the tray out of the oven. You’re so excited for Spencer to try your latest creation, you’re not paying attention to your hands and accidentally touch the super hot tray.

“Ow!” You scream. Spencer runs in and sees you cradling your palm.

“Sweetheart, what happened?” He asks, concerned.

“I accidentally burned my hand.” You hiss at the searing pain. You reach for the freezer to ice your burn.

Spencer stops you, “Wait! Don’t ice it! Ice is the worst thing for a burn!”

Spencer makes you sit at the dining table. He grabs a few things from the medicine cabinet as you watch.

He takes a leaf from your aloe vera plant, and cuts the leaf open. He takes some of the gel from the leaf and rubs it gently on your burn.

You wince at the sensation.

He notices and says, “Trust me it will help.”

“I know.” You manage a smile.

He bandages up your palm and kisses it.

“Alright get more of those every hour.” He says smiling.

“More aloe?” You ask, confused by what he means.

“No, the kisses.” He hands you some medicine to help with the pain. You take it and go back to making your bruschetta.

You pick up the bowl you’d premade with the mixture of extra virgin olive oil, garlic, oregano , basil, onions, salt and pepper. Meanwhile, Spencer transfers the bread onto a cooling rack for you.

You brush the mixture onto the bread slices. It smells divine. Then you add the chopped tomatoes. It envelops Spencer’s nostrils and makes his stomach grow hungrier. He tries to steal a slice when you’re not looking.

“It’s still hot Spence. Unless you want your tongue to look like my hand I would put that back.” He sighs and puts the slice back.

You sprinkle basil on the bruschetta and tell Spencer to wait in the living room. He obeys silently. Stomach growling louder by the second.

In the living room, the soft smell of toasted bread and cheese fills his senses yet again. You’d added mozzarella on top and bring it into the living room some time later.

“Cooled off?” He confirms.

“Yes, try some.” He takes the biggest piece and takes a bite. He moans happily when the taste hits his tongue.

“Oh wow!” Is all he can say.

“Delicious. Nothing better.” You say wiping a crumb off your mouth. You look at Spencer whose face is covered in crumbs. His mouth is full. This is one of the funniest things in the world and you laugh.

He tries to say ‘something on my face?’ but all that comes out is,

“Thomeing o ma ace?”

“Yes!” You laugh so hard you can’t breathe and tears fill your eyes.

After he swallows, he kisses you.

“We should make food together more often.”

“As long as you don’t eat it all before it’s done.” You tease.

“As long as you don’t burn your hand first.” He fires back jokingly.

“Oh yeah? What should we make next?”

“Cake!” His eyes light up.

You giddily run with him to the kitchen to go make a cake. You make a strawberry cake together and Spencer decorated it with pink icing and white icing flowers. You slice up some fresh strawberries and add them on top.

It was the best cake Spencer had ever eaten. Even more so, since it was made with love.

-

the end

-

tags🍓-

(if you would like to be tagged in all future works you can let me know by commenting a 🍓!)

@whoisspence

@lemonadeinfuser

@fictionalobssed

@exoticisles

@in-another-april

@gallifreyan-idiocracy

[feyburner]

im the sponge cake/baking amateur anon and omg thank you so much for your words and recipes!!! i will definitely start making little things and try not to freak out and instead embrace this new hobby with all its fluctuations…i will definitely keep coming back here for questions and recipes if you don’t mind 🫡🫡🫡

Of course, anytime. Don’t worry, just start with the basics and build from there. It gets easier and more intuitive every time you do it—and there are SO many types of things you can bake, you’ll never get bored. Don’t like baking cookies? Pivot to cake, pastry, pies, bread. Think about what flavors you like and find recipes that highlight those flavors.

Oh a couple more pieces of advice:

1. ALWAYS read through the ENTIRE recipe at least 2x before starting.

2. Mise en place! Gather all the ingredients together before you begin—so you don’t get halfway through only to realize you’re out of baking powder.

Here’s my recipe for Chocolate Velvet Cake. It’s a deep, dark, rich chocolate cake. Pictured here with Whipped Cream Cream Cheese Frosting, one of the only frostings I have ever liked.

CHOCOLATE VELVET CAKE

makes 2 x 8-9” cake layers

INGREDIENTS

2 cups (240g) AP flour

1 cup (200g) white sugar

1 cup (200g) dark brown sugar, packed

2 tsp baking soda

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp kosher salt

1 cup (227g) buttermilk* or sour cream

1 Tbsp white vinegar

1 cup (200g) neutral oil

2 eggs

1 Tbsp vanilla

1 cup (240g) freshly brewed steaming hot coffee (or 1 cup boiling water + 1 Tbsp instant coffee/espresso powder)

3/4 cup (60g) Dutch-process cocoa powder

*To make buttermilk: 1 cup milk + 1 Tbsp white vinegar or lemon juice. Stir together and let sit 10 min to curdle and thicken.

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350°. Grease 2 x 8-9” cake pans and line with parchment paper rounds.

2. Bloom cocoa: Measure cocoa into a large liquid measuring cup (for easy pouring later). Add 1 cup (pre-measured or by weight) hot coffee in increments, whisking in between, until mixture is smooth. **If you add coffee all at once you’ll get lumps. Add a little, whisk to a smooth paste, then add rest.

3. Mix dry ingredients: Sift flour, sugars, baking soda, baking powder, and salt into a large bowl (or bowl of stand mixer). Whisk thoroughly to combine. **Sifting really matters here. The final batter is very thin and if you don’t sift you will get lumps of flour.

4. In a separate bowl, whisk together buttermilk, vinegar, oil, eggs, and vanilla until smooth. While whisking, pour in coffee-cocoa mixture. Whisk until smooth.

5. Pour wet ingredients into dry and mix with a rubber spatula until just combined, scraping bottom and sides of bowl as needed to catch any dry pockets. Do not overmix. Batter will be thin.

6. Divide batter evenly between cake pans. Bake 30-40 minutes until a paring knife inserted in the center comes out moist but clean. Start checking at 30 minutes to avoid overbaking.

7. Cool in pans 15 minutes (no longer), then turn onto a wire rack to finish cooling. Let cool completely (1-2 hours) before frosting.

NOTES

- Cocoa: Dutch-process cocoa powder = the ultimate dark-as-night chocolate cake, but natural (regular) cocoa powder works just as well.

- Usually you can sub greek yogurt for buttermilk/sour cream, but not here. It doesn’t have enough fat.

- Buttermilk/sour cream + a little added vinegar react with the baking soda and cocoa powder to make a fluffy but velvety soft crumb. (Think baking soda volcano, but cake.) You cannot taste the vinegar at all.

[emeraldbloodcrown]

Once More

Chapter: Three - New Acquaintances Pairing: Poly; Tattoo Artists!141 x Baker!Female Reader Summary: Not getting the answers you want, you decide to catch a break at the town's festival, meeting two new strangers. Content/Warning: Still none, Kyle's dimples Word Count: 3.1k

Sharing a look with Anna both of you crouched by her sides, hooking an arm around her and guiding her movements until she could settle down on her bed. You swept another look over her body, trying to see the beginning of a bruise or her favoring an arm; anything to prove that she was injured. But you couldn't tell and she wouldn't say.

"Alright," you huffed exasperatedly. "Yell if you need anything."

Your grandmother waved you off, turning her hand as if to shoo you out of her room and you watched her pull the covers over herself before Anna closed the door.

You walked down the stairs in silence, a charged atmosphere between you both but Anna only addressed once you were back in your room.

"Do you buy it?"

Raising one of your eyebrow, you shot her a skeptic look. "Do you? Heavens, I don't want her to actually be injured but the way that just sounded… Plus, I can't shake that she's hiding something."

Anna furrowed her brows, "Anything in particular?"

"No, nothing I could point out but it's sitting there in the back of my mind, like things just don't fit together."

Climbing back into bed, you pulled the covers over you, setting an alarm for the next morning with the decision to start figuring out if your mind was playing tricks on you, or if there was truly something your grandmother was keeping to herself.

The next morning came faster than you had expected it, your entire body still aching from the day before and desperate for more sleep, and your finger hovered over the snooze button - just ten more minutes, or an hour - before you woke up enough to remember why you had set it so early to begin with.

The reason how your grandmother wound up owning a bakery had to do largely with her love for sweets. According to your father she had always been baking and progressing recipes to perfection. That was a similarity you apparently shared with her but where your drive came from a plethora of food allergies that made store bought foods feel like a round of Russian Roulette, she simply didn't like the taste, always complaining why she should buy it when she could make it so much better.

A sentiment that was soon shared by family and friends and after the first few people who hired her for making cakes and treats for their parties, she started to dream about doing that for a living and once her children had been old enough, she was able to fulfill that for herself.

Your grandmother had an unmatched love for good sweets and you reckoned that, with her age, it had been a long while since someone had gotten her something that hadn't been from a store, which could be just the right thing to get her to be more indulgent once you ask her some questions she's probably not gonna like.

Question was just what you were gonna make for her.

By the time you had something to show for your efforts, it was already an early morning and you could hear the slow, single footsteps of your grandmother making it down the stairs.

"Smells good in her, dearie. What're ya making?"

She circled the counter, one hand clutching the corner tight enough her knuckles were turning white and peaked into the pot.

"Quarkinis, hm?"

You hummed, rolling another ball out of curd dough and dropping it carefully into the hot oil.

"Gonna use powedered sugar?"

You hummed again.

"You used vanilla pods?"

Another hum.

"Two or three?"

"Don't play me; you've always used two and a half."

From the corner of your eyes, you could see her lips curl into a soft smile, nudging your side.

"I never understood your obsession with these. Ever since we made that trip to Germany, you just couldn't get enough of them."

"Cause you brought me there in the midst of the carnival season. Of course, I was gonna get hooked on sweets, music and bright colours. And," you raised a finger for emphasis before pointing it at her, "you combined Kreppels and Quarkinis for me so I wouldn't have to decide which I liked more."

There was a pause before your grandmother addressed the elephant in the room: "I also made them for you whenever we needed to talk."

"Sure did." Taking the last batch out of the oil and turning the stove off, you grabbed her a plate with the already filled in sugared curd balls. "Come on."

Your grandmother and you sat down in front of each other, the plate between you. She took one, observing the shape, giving it a small squeeze before taking a bite from it. 

She closed her eyes for a moment, her smile widening and pride shining in her eyes when she opened them again.

"Alright, what do you wanna talk about?"

"How did the fire start?"

You could visibly see how she was closing herself off: her shoulders drew high, lips turned into a thin line and her gaze hardened.

„I told you. Electric fire. The wires were old, was bound to happen one day."

You nodded. The report she had shown you when you had gotten back did state the cause of the fire as an electric one. Anna and you had already decided that you wanted everything of the bakery be new so that nothing could backfire on you due to age or over usage, so you had called someone to check and redo all of the wiring.

The thing was, given the tight-knit community, you had wounded up getting the son of the man who had done the check-ups for your grandmother, so they had both shown up for the appointment, meticulously checking everything after the father had apologized to you - 'could‘ve been your granny just the same' - and what they had found had raised more questions than answers.

All of the wiring was just as it should be, except for the one that had caused the fire. Which, father and son had pointed out, had started at a strange angle. It was too burnt now to truly tell, but you knew what they were trying to imply.

Someone had meddled with it.

"We just so happened to get the same electricians as you." 

"Oh, James‘ son? How nice of him to take over for his father" 

Her smile reappeared but it didn‘t reach her eyes, too practiced, as she went into an anecdote about something James did in his younger years.

"Sure, he also said that it‘s unlike his father to mess up like that-"

She didn‘t even let you finish properly before she started into an excuse.

"Well, didn‘t you always say that old people have a hard time coming to terms with the things they can‘t do anymore? And it‘s not like James‘ father is getting any younger either."

"Grandma."

She halted at the tone of your voice and watched as you crossed your arms and leaned over to rest them on the table.

"What aren‘t you telling me?"

"I don‘t know what you‘re talking about"

"All of the wiring was good. Kinda unlikely for it to burn your shop down, don‘t you think?"

"It was an electric fire," she insisted.

You knew you should back off but you also had the feeling that if you didn‘t push now, you might never get any clear answer from her.

"That‘s not true, and you know it!"

Her chair scratched over the floor as she slammed her hands on the table and got up.

"Stop it. You have no idea what you‘re talking about, just focus on rebuilding and leave everything else in the past. Where it belongs, I mean it."

You watched her leave before you deflated and pressed your hands over your head together. That wasn‘t ideal, but even if it wasn‘t the outcome you had hoped for, her reaction did show that something was off.

You took your time cleaning up, so by the time Anna found you, you were sitting on the window sill in the living room, window wide open and the hand closest to it holding a lit cigarette.

She came to a stop next to you, holding your shoulder to squeeze in and take a seat next to you, resting her head on your shoulder.

"Been a while since I've seen you smoke."

"Been a while since I've had a reason to."

She took the cigarette from your hand, taking a drag from it herself before she answered. "Yeah, I heard both of you yelling. Got anything?"

You shook your head, a bitter expression taking over your face. "Nope, only told me to drop it."

Anna scoffed and you couldn't help but smile. Years of working together had taught her that you were known for your stubbornness, often taking up fights with management for the sake of your residents' wellbeing. She had experienced it so many times that she had grown used the tone of voice that would precurse you not listening.

The same tone that was in your voice right now.

"Which you're obviously not gonna do."

Wrapping your arm around her shoulder, you squeezed her body. "Aww, look at you knowing me so well," You took your cigarette again, taking another drag, "No, I know something's going on."

"Well before you make that bomb explode, we got a festival to get to."

The sun was just starting to set when you and Anna arrived. The town square had been transformed: fairy lights and colorful pennants with the town's emblem hanging between the old street lamps and a stage right in the middle of it with several stalls loaded with a wide variety of food or little trinkets to buy.

You watched the pre-teens dancing to a mix of popular songs on stage before you hooked your arm with Anna and wandered into the masses. Quickly you noticed that nearly every family business was represented on this festival in one way or another but any bigger shop, those that had hundreds of branches all over the country, were missing.

A sudden pull from your elbow made you stop and look to Anna who had stopped, her fingers still in the crease of your elbow but she was focused on something on your left, her eyes filled with a child-like wonder. You had an inkling what had put her in such a state but you followed her line of sight, and heaved a sigh when you saw indded what you had been expecting.

Behind the row of food stalls were a few festival games set up, among them a shooting gallery with the woman working it advertising a giant sparkling Pegasus as the main prize.

"I want it…"

"5 pounds for three tries; that's gonna add up fast."

"I knooow"

You almost laughed when you heard her honest-to-God whine and you couldn't help but egg her on a little.

"You don't need it, tho"

Anna grabbed your arm with both hands and shook you while she kept whining.

"I want it so bad. I need it! Come on, have a heart."

"Okay, okay!  Where's your cut off?"

"500," she replied instantly and you snapped your head at her.

"The fuck you are; go lower. We ain't made of money."

"495"

"Try 50 or I'll keep your wallet hostage until we're home."

"You're a horrible friend," she said while grabbing the bills from you and stomped towards the game.

"For keeping you from bankruptcy? Yeah, so horrible."

Your only answer was Anna flipping you off. Laughing to yourself at that, you decided to take a look around to find something to keep you occupied while Anna tried to score her new friend.

You set your eyes on a claw crane and found if Anna could waste cash, so could you. Most people walked past the money trap, leaving only one person in front and you used the time to figure out which prize you wanted to try for.

"Bloody hell," he exclaimed in front of you, smacking his hands against the machine as it beeped sadly, indicating a loss. Noticing your eyes on him, he turned slightly, allowing you to see his, admittedly, pretty face; clean shaven and dark skin so soft to the look that it made you think of needing to do more of a skin care routine.

"Sorry, didn't mean to shout."

"All good. Which one were you trying to get?"

He made space for you and you stepped to the controls of the machine, feeding it the money for the first try. Surprised by your question, he pointed to plushie of a red panda holding a heart.

"That one. For my girlfriend."

You smiled at that and set the crane up for the panda.

"Oh please, you really don't ha-"

"They're a favorite of hers?"

You got on your tip toes for a moment before you decided to take the arm a little more to the left and letting it go down.

"Yeah, saw some compilation of them and has been obsessed ever since."

"That's cute."

The claws opened and closed around the leg, slipping a bit but had grabbed enough chunk of the body that it held on. You cheered the machine on as it so ever slowly moved to the front, and jumped in joy when it slid down the hatchet, and the machine beeped a success.

Taking in by your joy, the two of you high-fived before you went to retrieve the toy and give it to him.

"There was really no need for that but thank you," he said, adorning a sweet smile that dimples pop out in his cheeks.

"Anyone willing to get that angry for his girlfriend deserves some help. Besides, I often get lucky with these machines. Only them, tho," you laughed.

"Gotta remember that for next time then. I'm Kyle, by the way." Putting the panda under his arm, he reached to offer his hand and just as you were about to give him your name, you heard it being scremed by a very familiar voice.

Turning around to the commotion, you saw Anna waving, and when she noticed she had your attention, she waved the giant Pegasus in her arms.

"Unbelievable…"

"Your friend?" Kyle asked and, once you nodded while sighing in exasperation, he continued, "She looks fun. And she's found Johnny."

You looked again. Hooked around her arm was a man: tall with a mohawk, shirt exposing the intricate sleeve on his right arm, and an easy smile on his lips as he chatted with Anna and let himself be dragged by her to where you were standing with Kyle.

"Look!" Anne yelled when she was close enough, excitement bubbling in her voice.

"Can't believe you actually won it."

"Oh no, can't take the credit for that," she pulled Johnny closer, "he got it for me"

Mohawk guy - Johnny - winked at Anna, "Cannae leave a damsel in distress, aye?"

"And I'm sure you only had noble intentions," Kyle scoffed, smirk on his lips to which Johnny only rolled his eyes.

"I see ye got the toy fer yer girl."

Kyle clasped a hand around your shoulder: "Curtesy of my new friend."

Clapping his hands together once, Johnny said, "That calls for drinks. Come on."

You joined Anna's side just as Johnny went to Kyle, wrapping an arm around him and patting him on the back.

"Glad you could make it."

Johnny lead the three of you to the backside of the festival where a couple restaurant had their outdoor seating left open and offered food and drinks for a lower price. Naturally, seemingly ever table was occupied but Johnny found one almost hidden away at the far back.

Anna and you sat down next to each other with both of the boys opposite tou, and when you all had a drink, you clinked your glasses together in a toast.

"To new acquaintances."

Talking to new people had never been your strong suit, especially when you couldn't hide behind one of your expertises. But there was just something about how Johnny and Kyle created a pleasant atmosphere that even you could let yourself loose and not worry how you might be perceived.

"Am serious, Simon looked ready to murder him. Poor lad just about pissed himself."

Johnny had been retelling stories of their work, most of them having a Simon guy at the front of some customer forgetting their place.

"Wait, wait," you interjected, "so Simon's the big guy, right? Dressed like he's ready to rob a bank, that one?"

Johnny nodded vigorously, almost bouncing in his drunken giggle fit.

"And you have actually customers who throw a fit with him?"

Anna and you looked at each other incredulously, ready for Johnny to anounce it was a joke but nothing happened.

"So people are insane here, that's good to know."

You finished your drink, taking another look at Kyle. He had been joking with Johnny and sharing his own stories but for a while he had been absolutely quiet, eyes glued to the phone while his thumbs flew over the screen. A sharp curse escpaing his lips, getting Johnny's attention too, before he threw his drink back, patting his jacket for his wallet before Johnny stopped him.

"I got ye. Donnea worry, can pay me back later."

"Thanks, man. Sorry, I'll make this up to you," Kyle said, shifting his eyes as if to include you and Anna in the apology.

"Take care"

Anna nudged you, showing you the time.

"We should probably get going too," she said, raising her hand to flag down a waiter.

That seemed to get Johnny's attention, his head turning back to you both.

"Sure, ye girls mind if I bring ye home? Jus' tae be safe."

You hesitated for a moment but Anna jumped on the chance, swooning about him being a gentleman and hooking arms with him as soon as you were ready to leave. You could practically see hearts in her eyes and you realized where this was heading; sighing.

The entire way home,the conversation kept going but mainly between Anna and Johnny but you found yourself smiling at his attempts to keep you a participant and not just a listener while Anna chatted his ear off.

It didn't take long until you were almost home, bakery to your left when Johnny stopped, observing the work you had been doing.

"Damn me, almost back to her glory."

"And we're not even close to done," Anna exclaimed, letting go of Johnny in favor of hugging her new friend to her chest.

Johnny looked at you, "Cannae wait. Ye ever need help, ye know where ta find me."

[kd-heart]

Telesphore Berry liqueur cupcakes

Officially, Telesphore's cupcakes should be snake-berry and swamp apricot, which are clearly unavailable to me, so I went with berries from a fresh batch of berry liqueur and some almond and vanilla extract. Which means these are going to take longer to perpare than usual, since you need at least two weeks to make the liqueur (the berries need to sit in sugar and ferment for about a week and then at least another week to macerate with the alcohol of your choice). I went with a fluffy cake that I overbaked, to get a nice, crispy exterior.

Recipe under the cut and on ao3

If you know how to make vișinată or afinată or any other kind of -ată, or a cordial, you're set. If you don't, I recommend looking up a recipe, but what I did was put a bunch of blueberries, redcurrants, strawberries and sliced apricots (get the pieces about the same size as the berries) in a 1L jar with about 200gr sugar, in layers, and leave them for about a week. Shake the jar every now and then, so the sugar dissolves. About a week later, you'll have some nice syrup and some fermented fruit - fill up the rest of the jar with vodka and leave it for at least another week. (You're supposed to leave it for three months for vișinată, for instance, but that would just make this whole recipe's prep time ridiculously long. You can let whatever's left from making the cupcakes age properly afterwards. A week is long enough for what we need here).

Now, for the cupcakes proper.

Ingredients:

4 eggs, separated

200gr sugar

1tsp vanilla essence

1/2tsp almond essence

150gr flour

1/4tsp salt

4tbsp oil

2tbsp water

a few drops lemon juice

200gr berries from the liqueur (this will include about a tablespoon of alcohol) (if you don't want to use alcohol, you can use fresh berries and apricots. don't worry about it)

Preheat oven (Gas Mark 4/180° C/350 F).

Separate the eggs

Mix the yolks with 2tbsp sugar, half the salt, the vanilla and almond essence

Beat the egg whites with the rest of the salt, a few drops of lemon juice and the rest of the sugar (add it gradually), until you get stiff peaks

Incorporate as much flour as you can into the yolk mixture

Gradually incorporate the whites into the mixture (switch to a fork or a whisk at this point)

Gradually incorporate the rest of the flour, one tablespoon at the time

Carefully incorporate the berries into the batter.

Spoon the batter into the muffin tray and bake for 30min

Leave them in the over for a couple more minutes after they're done, to make sure they won't deflate.

Let them cool in the tray for 1-2min after you take them out and then let them cool completely.

Frosting:

250gr mascarpone

3tbsp sugar

1tbsp berry liqueur

a few drops of blue and red food dye

Mix until stiff

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Vil Schoenheit - Apprentice Chef Vignette

"Master Chef"

[Kitchen]

Master Chef ― Vil Version ～Let's Make Chocolate Cake 1～

Ghost Chef: I know you said you wanted to take the Master Chef course so you can appear on a cooking show…

Ghost Chef: But I can only teach you how to cook. I don't know anything about television programming.

Vil: I completely understand that. My purpose here is only to strengthen my cooking prowess.

Vil: As I learn the proper techniques and gain experience, each movement I make will start to naturally refine, wouldn't you say?

Ghost Chef: I get it. I feel a bit better after hearing that, Vil-kun. Alright, let's get started on a Chocolate Cake!

Vil: A classic pastry, everyone's favorite. I suppose I should pre-heat the oven.

Ghost Chef: Oh, nicely done. Set it to 180°C.

Vil: Set it for 180°C and… It's now pre-heating. So then, I'll start the prep now.

Ghost Chef: Crack open the eggs into the bowl, then add the granulated sugar. Mix it thoroughly until it's white and thick.

Vil: I understand. Now that I'm taking a look at the ingredients before me, I see that we'll be using a lot more granulated sugar than I had expected.

Vil: It reminds me of the first time I made dressing, I was taken aback by the amount of oil needed for it…

Vil: Unless you make it yourself, there's no telling what kind and how much of certain ingredients are in a dish.

[mixes batter]

Vil: I've been stirring and letting it take in oxygen… It's starting to become fluffy and white.

Ghost Chef: Look at you, moving your hands and speaking at the same time. Is that something you'd have to do on those TV shows?

Vil: That's right. If all I do is cook silently, that would be completely uninteresting, wouldn't you say?

Vil: On top of that, my own pride wouldn't let me appear as though I lack the know-how.

Ghost Chef: Hmmm, that's pretty rough… Alright, go ahead and stir in the cocoa powder and wheat flour.

Vil: I see they're already mixed together. Now I'll just sift it properly so there are no lumps…

Ghost Chef: Nice, well done. Mix it all well together with the rubber spatula as if you're trying to slice it.

Vil: I just need to scoop the batter from the bottom of the bowl and make sure it evenly blends together… Baking cake is much more laborious than I thought.

Vil: Everything has been tidied up, and I've finished making the apricot jam for the cake.

Ghost Chef: The cake sponge has probably cooled enough by now. Try popping it out from the mold.

Vil: Right. …The cake slid out of the mold just like the recipe said it would. Very nice.

Ghost Chef: Alright, now pour the apricot jam you made earlier onto the surface.

Ghost Chef: And spread it evenly across all sides with a palette knife.

Vil: So a thin layer of the jam is spread over the sponge-like surface, to help smooth it out.

Vil: This is exactly how it would be preparing to apply makeup.

Vil: Especially if I think of the jam as the primer, and the chocolate as the foundation.

Ghost Chef: Ahaha. That's an interesting way to put it. Now, let's make the chocolate glaçage.

Ghost Chef: Put the chocolate in the bowl and melt it by immersing the bowl in hot water.

Vil: And then I stir it with the rubber spatula like so… It's starting to melt from around the edges.

Vil: As the chocolate warms, its sweet scent starts to pervade the air.

Ghost Chef: Heh, maybe that aroma will even be trailing out of this kitchen.

Ghost Chef: Oh, looks like the chocolate has all melted. Next, immerse the bottom of the bowl in cold water.

Vil: We just melted it, and now you want me to cool it?

Ghost Chef: Yep. By applying heat and cold repetitively, the cocoa butter in the chocolate can crystallize.

Ghost Chef: When you temper in this way, you can make a velvety rich chocolate glaçage.

Vil: I understand. I'll make sure that this cake is enveloped by the most gorgeous chocolate glaçage you've ever seen.

[Kitchen]

Master Chef ― Vil Version ～Let's Make Chocolate Cake 2～

Vil: So, we lower the temperature of the chocolate by immersing it in cold water… and then warm it before it hardens?

Ghost Chef: That's right. And don't let up on the stirring. The slightest change in temperature can affect it.

Vil: I can't allow myself to get distracted one bit, hm. I need to be able to continue conversation even while concentrating on the task at hand.

[tempers chocolate]

Ghost Chef: Wow. Tempering is a pretty difficult task, but you did pretty good for your first time!

Vil: Temperature management is just as important in potionology, you see. Even a 1°C difference can transform a potion into poison.

Ghost Chef: I see. I guess your potionology knowledge came in handy, then.

Vil: There's also the way the recipe needs to be fully understood and followed to the letter and the ingredients need to be carefully prepared, measured and mixed in…

Vil: As well as how everything needs to be thoroughly blended together until the desired outcome is realized… Potions and baking have much in common.

Vil: Those who have a penchant for potions and poisons could have what it takes to be a pâtisserie.

Ghost Chef: I-I think it's a little scary to think about how the ability to craft poisons could help bake sweets.

Vil: Joking aside… How does the chocolate glaçage look now?

Ghost Chef: Perfect. That's all you'll need for the tempering. Time to finish the cake!

Ghost Chef: The trick here is to take the palette knife and spread the chocolate before it cools and hardens completely.

Vil: To present a beautiful cake, the chocolate must be uniformly spread over the total surface.

Vil: I only need to think of it as though I am applying foundation after having used primer on the face already.

Vil: Alright, I'm ready to pour the glaçage now.

Vil: The cake sponge is now completely covered in the glaçage. Now I'll use the palette knife as if it were a make-up spatula…

Vil: …LIKE THIS!

Ghost Chef: A-Amazing! Usually, we'll get amateurs overusing the palette knife and leaving lines everywhere, but…

Ghost Chef: You've not a single wasteful movement! What a beautiful display…

Vil: Heh, done to perfection. This is my masterpiece, combining techniques from both make up and potionology.

Ghost Chef: It looks so smooth and shiny and beautiful. It would be a shame to cut into it.

Vil: I fully agree… But I suppose we must head to the judging venue momentarily.

[Cafeteria – Judging Venue]

Idia: I thought I'd just order a choco cake to get a quick sugar high but then… Next thing I know, I'm dragged into this mess...

Vil: So, my judge is Idia, I see. I'm rather surprised you ordered the chocolate cake.

Idia: HIEE! N-N-N-NO WAY, VIL-SHI!?

Idia: Th-There's no way I'm getting out of this without an earful no matter what I say. I'll just smash the like button, so can I go…?

Vil: Stop thinking and tell me what you honestly think. Here, have a taste.

Idia: I-I just need to eat and get this over with… [chew, chew]…

Idia: …I…I g-guess… it's good…?

Idia: Tho this is just a singular opinion… It in no way guarantees or endorses the actual flavor of the product…

Ghost Chef: Uhh, right, so I guess that's a passing grade then. Good job, Vil-kun.

Vil: Indeed, thank you. But more importantly…

Idia: Y-YOU'RE THE ONE WHO ASKED ME TO JUDGE, WHAT DO YOU MEAN MORE IMPORTANTLY!?

Vil: I wonder how I looked while cooking. Let's check the camera footage.

Ghost Chef: …Ah! You recorded yourself with your smartphone while cooking!? I didn't even notice!!

Idia: His eyes are just glued to that video… Despite deleting my comment from his IRL feed…

Vil: There doesn't seem to be many issues with how I do any of the basic techniques, like breaking eggs, or mixing the batter.

Vil: The issue is with tempering. I was so focused on the task that I couldn't spare a single glance towards the camera…

Vil: My conversation level dropped immensely. It seems I still have much to improve on.

Vil: Not only do I need to present my food beautifully, but myself as well.

Requested by @sakurakudo and @dare-to-walk-alone.

[five-miles-over]

For All Time, It Was Always You

Chapter 2: Mrs. Laufeyson

A/N: Thank you everyone for all of your positive comments! I really appreciate it, and hope you'll like this little continuation from the suburbs AU inspired partly by Wandavision.

Summary: After Loki leaves for work, you explore your new house and try to fit in with this world that feels too perfect to be real.

Pairing: Loki x Wife!Reader

Warnings: None really. Talk about 'traditional' gender roles. A surprise cameo. And silliness.

You waved goodbye, standing at the doorway as a black Chevrolet Bel Air departed from the house with Loki in the driver's seat. And like the doting wife that he thought you were, you blew a kiss in his direction.

When the car disappeared from your line of sight, you meandered into the sea green kitchen and filled a steel kettle with water, letting it sit on the stove the way a hen sat on her eggs. While the kettle grew hot, you searched the cabinets for tea bags,…and anything else that might help you understand this new, suburban world. A world in which you were the newlywed wife of a TVA employee who shared a name with the Norse God of Mischief. 

Next to a box of Earl Grey Tea was an entire section of the cabinet dedicated to biscuits of various brands and flavors: chocolate Hobnobs, Jaffa cakes, McVitie's digestive biscuits, shortbread, Bourbon cookies, and Oreos. At least three, unopened tubes of Oreo cookies. Were all of these sweet treats for you, or for your - you couldn't believe you were actually using this word - husband?

With a shrug, you grabbed a tube of the Oreo cookies, ripped it open and started eating them one by one. Holding the blue wrapper in one hand, you continued searching through the other kitchen cabinets. 

You found nothing but flour, brown sugar, white sugar, spices, marmite, extra virgin olive oil…, and two jars of strawberry jam from the same brand for some reason. And then, something next to a box of spaghetti caught your eye. A cookbook, with various pages dog-eared, titled Delicious Recipes For All Time, Always.

You blinked, carefully taking the book from the shelf. For All Time, Always? That's a weird title to call a cookbook…, a vague title as well. Inside the cover was a handwritten note, scribbled in blue pen.

The way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Congratulations on the wedding, Mrs. Laufeyson! Loki's a lucky guy.

-Mobius M. Mobius

So that's who Loki was talking about at breakfast. He mentioned cancelling plans with someone named 'Mobius'. Someone who was making him watch tedious videos at work today. 

Jumping to the dog-eared pages of the cookbook, you came across various recipes: poached eggs, blueberry pancakes, macaroni and cheese, spaghetti bolognese, green bean casserole, Cumberbatch pie, curried chickpeas in coconut milk, angel food cake with strawberries and cream, chocolate mayonnaise cake…

Whiiiiiiieeee!

You whipped your head over your shoulder and immediately silenced the kettle's whistle, turning off the stove. Damnit, you went looking for tea bags and found yourself exploring everything except tea bags. Shaking your head, you shoved an Oreo into your mouth and opened the box of Earl Grey tea bags. 

Then, you opened a cabinet filled with plates, bowls, and cups, grabbing a white ceramic mug for your tea bag. On the top shelf of the cabinet was a pastel blue gift box. While the tea bag steeped in hot water, you reached for the box using a chair as a makeshift stepping stool. Inside the gift box were two mugs labeled 'Mr.' and 'Mrs.' in gold calligraphy And like the cookbook, there was a handwritten note as well. 

For all the mornings you'll have together. Congratulations to you both, Mr. and Mrs. Laufeyson! May the years ahead be filled with lasting love and happiness.

-Jeremy, Joyce, and Bill Hazeldine

With a gasp, you quickly closed the box and put it back on the shelf…only to open the box, taking another peek at the note. Mrs. Laufeyson...you underlined those words with your fingertip. Taking a deep breath, you put the box back on the shelf for good, promising to never use those mugs unless you were with Loki. 

By this point, the tea was hot enough to be enjoyed but not scalding that it would burn your throat. You took a sip, relaxing in its warmth, holding the mug with both hands. "Mrs. Laufeyson", you repeated to yourself. You looked down at your left hand, the emerald ring still on your middle finger just the same way it was this morning. 

After you finished drinking your tea and scarfing down the rest of the Oreo cookies in the container, you wandered into the living room. It was just across from the kitchen, a pastel yellow room with white bookshelves containing all kinds of hardcover and paper cover works. One would probably need an entire decade just to finish reading all the books kept inside the living room. You tilted your head and wondered which of the books were your husband's choice. But before you could sit down on one of the couches, you heard the doorbell ring.

"Who is it?" You asked, fixing your hair. 

A light, female voice came from outside. "It's Joyce!" As you made your way to the front door, you caught a glimpse of yourself in mirror hanging in the hallway. Your hair was miraculously styled, and you were wearing a cute set of pajamas…It almost made you stand still for a moment just so you could admire how desirable you looked. No wonder your husband was so lovey-dovey this morning.

The doorbell rang again. Putting on your best smile, you dragged your feet towards the door and opened it. 

Standing outside was a thin, middle-aged woman -presumably Joyce - with a bowl cut hairstyle, wearing a light blue shirt and straight-leg jeans. "Oh hello, dear. So good to see you again!" She gave you a warm smile and a hug, rocking you in her arms.

"Good to see you too, Joyce." You politely reciprocated her hug and let out a small laugh. "Thank you again for the mugs, they're lovely."

Joyce placed her hands on your arms for a moment, looking up at you. "I haven't seen you both since you came back from your honeymoon. Oh, look at you…" She marveled, "Married life seems to be treating you well."

"Thank you so much," you looked down, deciding to be as demure as possible, hoping they wouldn't ask too many questions about the honeymoon. "I…I couldn't be happier, Loki is so sweet to me." When your eyes met Joyce's, you touched the back of your neck. "I…He makes me feel like the luckiest lady in the world, Joyce."

Joyce quietly laughed with you. "You remember my son Bill, right?" Towering over Joyce was a lanky teenage boy with golden curls, blue eyes, and the face of an angel. He wore a grey t-shirt, worn-out jeans, and beat-up sneakers. 

You reached out to shake his hand. "Of course I do," you lied. "Hi, Bill."

"Afternoon, Mrs. Laufeyson." Bill greeted you with a smile that could make London light up during a blackout. "Congratulations again."

"Thank you." You placed your left hand on your heart, showing off your wedding ring just a little. "How are you, Bill?"

"I'm alright, thank you." Bill nodded. "I've been working with the church, teaching Sunday school. Thought it'd be a nice way to spend my summer after my first year of college."

"That's very thoughtful of you."

"Thank you. I thought it would be good for my theology course to do something like that," Bill admitted before reaching into one of his jean pockets, procuring a small blue velvet box. "Actually, I have something for you, Mrs. Laufeyson." 

You covered your mouth in disbelief. "Oh, Bill…"

"Please, take it." He extended the box to you. "I bought it for my former-girlfriend Jewel." Blinking, you gingerly accepted it, running your finger along the lid. "Former girlfriend…You broke up with her?"

Joyce intervened, "He had to do it, dear. She was nothing but trouble."

"I'm so sorry."

 "No, I'm sorry." Bill shook his head. "I bought it for her a long time ago, but I suppose it was never meant to last. But, I really want to give it to someone. Please, consider it a belated wedding gift, Mrs. Laufeyson."

You smiled, opening the box to find a sterling silver bracelet. Simple, yet elegant. "Thank you, Bill. I'll treasure it. If you ever want to talk, or just stop by for some tea, the door will always be open for you."

"Thanks, Mrs. Laufeyson," he graciously said. "And I hope Jewel finds someone else who'll make her happy."

The three of you stood quietly outside your house before you spoke up. "Joyce, would you and Bill like to come inside for some tea?"

"Not today, dear. I'm so sorry, Bill's coming with me to do some errands. And I'm sure you might need to catch up on some sleep after such a busy honeymoon." Joyce teased you a little with the last bit. "Might only be a matter of time before you and Loki get a visit from the stork."

You laughed, looking down again. You remembered how Loki hugged you from behind this morning and teased you with the idea of "finishing what you started on the honeymoon". Almost instinctively, your free hand rested on your stomach.

"We should have dinner sometime, Loki and I would love to have you over, we can catch up," you blurted. Joyce enthusiastically agreed and said she and her husband would love that.

"Tomorrow night," Joyce promised. "Would seven-thirty be alright?"

"Absolutely!" You nodded, already imagining how to tell Loki when he came home from work. "I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"See you tomorrow." Joyce and Bill waved goodbye as they climbed into their car and drove off. 

Something ached inside you as you watched them drive off, maybe because it reminded you of the way that Loki drove off this morning while you stood at the doorway waving goodbye. As you closed the door once again, you pondered over going out tomorrow, even if it was just something as small as a mid-morning stroll while Loki was out. But for now, there were other things that needed to be done.

Tagging: @anukulee @smolvenger @pineappleandro @lotsoflokilove23 @talklokitome @rumin8ting @12-pm-510 @painedfever @iambetterthanbefore @princess-ofthe-pages @thenotoriouserg @lokischambermaid @lokiismineforever @lokidbadguy @lokisgoodgirl @lokisprettygirl22 @holdmytesseract @wheredafandomat @wolfsmom1 @lovelysizzlingbluebird @evelyn-kingsley @muddyorbsblr @stupidthoughtsinwriting @icytrickster17 @thatdummy-girl @fantasyfan4life @huntress-artemiss @itsdoni @gruftiela @ellooo0ooo @ireallyneedtherapy @jennyggggrrr @turniptitaness @lokiforever

[ask-barbatos]

Hello, everyone. I was fortunate to receive the recipe for my birthday cake from our human exchange student, and I have been given permission to share it here with you.

I do not have a picture, unfortunately, as it was very quickly eaten. I apologize that I was a little too slow to pull out my camera.

Important notes

Keep all ingredients at room temperature unless otherwise stated.

Make sure your baking soda and powder are fresh, within 6 months of opening.

Recipe can be scaled up or down. If you must divide an egg, scramble it first and measure it's volume to divide from.

Mint Chocolate Tea Cake

Dry Ingredients:

266g / 2 cups All-Purpose Flour

332g / ⅔ cups Granulated Sugar

60g / ⅔ cup Unsweetened Cocoa Powder

10g / 2 tsp Baking Soda

5g / 1 tsp Baking Powder

2.5g / ½ tsp Salt

Wet Ingredients:

120ml / ½ cup Vegetable Oil

2 Large Eggs

8ml / 1 ½ tsp Peppermint Extract

240ml / 1 cup Buttermilk (Can Substitute 1 tbsp distilled white vinegar + whole milk, let sit 15 minutes)

240ml / 1 cup of HOT Earl Grey + Mint Tea, with or without leaves

Sift and blend together the dry ingredients until mixed.

Separately, blend the wet ingredients EXCEPT the hot tea.

Mix the wet and dry ingredients together.

Finally, mix in the hot tea. The batter will be quite wet. (Barbatos: Be cautious to not overmix your batter. Mixing too much may yield a dense cake.)

Bake at 177°C/350°F until an inserted toothpick in the middle comes out dry.

Cupcakes: 2/3 full for 15-18 minutes 10cm/4in round pan | 180-238ml/¾-1 cup batter | 18-24 min 20cm/8in round pan | 720-960ml/3-4 cups batter | 35-40 min 30cm/12in round pan | 1.8-2.4L/7 ½-10 cups batter | 40-45 min 28x18cm/11x7in rectangular pan | 1.2-1.6L/5-6 ⅔ cups batter | 45-50 min 23x33cm/9x13in rectangular pan | 1.8-2.4L/7 ½-10 cups batter | 40-45 min